#FUCKING EXPLODES?

[saewokhrisz]

you could think better with a hole in your head

[deaths]

Purple, violet, and plum, but you didn't hear that from me 💜

Purple - You’re hot. Violet - I would date you. Plum - I would fuck you.

WHAT!!! UM THANK YOU THANK YOU

[riacte]

not romantic not platonic but a secret third thing [what would happen between earth and the moon if the earth stopped spinning as illustrated by xkcd randall munroe]

[liquidstar]

Yes, Greece still exists, we didn't all die 2000 years ago. Yes, people speak Greek. You people are so fucking stupid for real. So many of you claim to love ancient shit but can't even acknowledge the actual living culture of the people whose mythology and classics you romanticize. You keep leaving annoying comments about how you just forget Greek people still exist, thinking you're being quirky because you love ancient stuff soooo much that you forgot about the people it came from. You think about it so little you don't even realize that an actual Greek person has to read this shit, making it clear how little you actually care about the culture beyond the romanticized (and westernized) mythology. Don't claim you love Greece, don't use our mythology anymore if you can't acknowledge that we're still around without making it about how little you think about us. It's mind boggling that you'd think a Greek person would read this and think you're anything but obnoxious. Explode.

[lotus-pear]

can't stand them

[greelin]

it feels like it’s fucking 11pm. and it’s not even 7

[theboxfort]

[Image Description: A white text box: "Accounts created after May 8th, 2023 have the 'For You' tab as the default dashboard tab. Other existing users' dashboard tabs are not changed. We are also working on making dashboard tabs even more customizable, including adding the ability to choose which tab appears first." End ID.]

From the latest update (June 2nd, 2023)

Oh, fuck this. If you're a new user, don't forget to set your dashboard to Following and turn "Based on your likes" and "Best stuff first" off

EDIT: A few corrections

For new users, you can't change the default back to Following. This means that whenever you open up your app/go to your dash, the first tab you'll see is the For You tab

Note for the previous point, I can't confirm this since my account is rather old, if anybody has an examples, I'd appreciate it

Yes, some people mentioned that you don't have to turn off Based on your likes and Best stuff first, but that's mostly my preference since (to me at least) it does not work, it just shows me random shit that is absolutely not based on my likes

My main problem with this update is that it strips the user from being able to choose what they wanted to see. It's totally cool if you use the For You tab, but it shouldn't be the default option

Additional points from the tags and reblogs:

You can turn off public likes and followings, again, not mandatory, but it's an option

Make sure to turn off Tumblr Live (pretty sure it's only available to US users, which I am not one) since it apparently drains mobile data

There are (browser) addons and extensions that allows you to block elements or make your tumblr experience better, like uBlock Origin (an adblocker which can be used to block certain elements from showing up) and the XKit Control Panel/New XKit

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

so in an attempt to actually use positive thinking, anytime i fuck up and my brain reacts as if ive cause a minor apocalyptic event, i compare my fuck up to the 4 minute fuck up committed by the crew of the uss william d porter.

and only today, as i was having to explain what happened to my mom when i was explaining the whole comparison thing, did i realise that most people dont know about it and ive decided that needs to change because its objectively hilarious.

...which is a weird thing to say about an event that occured on a warship in 1943, specifically november 14th.

see the uss william d porter was a fletcher-class destroyer but you dont need to know what that means, just that she had guns that went bang bang and that she was escorting another ship, the uss iowa, to cairo.

while they were on their way there, they performed some gun trials like testing the anti-aircraft guns or the torpedos. and while they were running a torpedo drill, the crew of the porter managed to fire a live torpedo straight at the iowa which you know, in terms of a list of things to do while escorting a ship, shooting a torpedo at them is not on that list.

especially if the president of the united states is on board.

yeah so fdr was on board and the gun trials were actually his idea, and part of the trials was that they were conducted under radio silence.

and that means the crew of the porter couldnt just call the iowa to be like "move out the way, we accidentally shot a torpedo at you."

but they did have signal lamps and you know, the signalman on board was trained to signal this exact kind of message.

...and uh never mind, the signalman did manage to successfully tell the iowa that a torpedo was coming toward them but wasnt as successful when it came to the direction the torpedo was coming from.

not all hope is lost though because the signalman could still use the signal lamp to correct his previous mistake and-, never mind, he announced that the porter was reversing, which she wasnt.

yeah so at catastrophic mistake number 3, they broke radio silence to warn the iowa and she managed to turn out of the way just in time which meant no one got hurt. and even though the inquiry into the incident led to chief torpedoman (fantastic job title btw) lawton dawson being sentences to hard labour, fdr intervened and waved away his sentence, saying it was all an accident.

but yeah, so thats my new measure for "how much did i really fuck up?" and when i compared accidentally picking up a pencil case without a tag on it in wilko, turns out it was a very minor fuck-up. yes, the cashier had to ask another worker to grab a duplicate so they could scan the barcode, but i didnt nearly kill the president during wartime via accidental friendly fire

[chloesimaginationthings]

This will be the first scene of FNAF 2 movie…

[paesthethyc]

The singular thing i contributed to drawpile last night

this is lee’s bartender senshi au

[isjasz]

☀️⭐🌙👁️👑

This is the way you are supposed to play this game.

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

guyyyyssss

so we're out for a meal at one of those fancy tasting menu places and they went on about the sourdough for some elements of it so i was obv delighted to talk yeast with the chef

and when they bring us out our bill stuff and little extras at the end of the night look what i was gifted:

he's goin in my checked luggage, looks like lassy is getting a NEW SIBLING SOURDOUGH!

[providnce]

#let her speak

Derry Girls (2018-2022) Season 2 | Episode 3

[packet-of-staples]

Day 190 of drawing Papyrus until he cameos in deltarune. I fucking hate him, why is he like this. Ass in the air like he just dont care fr. I love his goofy ass so much I need to study him under a microscope.

[cabinette]

[saphushia]

the hardest part of the job is breaking the news that lactose intolerance is more permanent than death