Pt III good omens but i STILL SOMEHOW haven't watched it (and i'm increasingly passive aggressive)
i'm now basically held hostage adopted as mascot by this fandom. it's fine i'm fine *SIGNALS FOR HELP DESPERATELY*
Alright fuckers I swear this time I'm going to get some shit right. Without further ado, here's my third attempt at a good omens summary:
Everything everywhere is queer all at once
Angel Aziraphale and demon Crowley on earth likey each other
The car is a bentley and it is BLACK not silver and everyone is very upset about this. my bad yall it was reflecting light therefore i guessed more silver than black but I'm not Anish Kapoor take your black.
Then it is yellow, and aziraphale likes it. crowley preferred the black because he's a flamboyant emo.
God is a deadbeat absentee parent and you are all children of divorce.
There's a naked archangel and they cause problems for the husbands somehow. By being naked? By being an archangel? By being at their doorstep? Who knows not me
They were actually married for 6000 years, they just are the last to know about it.
Crowley is on fire. Like, he's slaying for sure, but also he is literally on fire, like Aziraphale's bookstore.
The actors like I said before are Michael Sheen and David Tennant but this is the place where I finally admit that I don't actually know who is whom. I'm going to assume Michael is Aziraphale because Michael sounds angel-y and David is Crowley because uh Michaelangelo made David and was gay for him.
Terry Pratchett is not fictional.
He co-wrote the book with @neil-gaiman, who IS fictional, because he does not have social media. Several of you have assured me that he is in fact a fandom inside joke. I like to think he would be proud of me.
They adopt a preteen and Crowley gives him bad advice.
At some point a baby was delivered to someone and was exchanged for the son of Satan. Idk if the baby is the preteen, or the son of satan is the preteen, or neither. This could be a fanfic, I have no way of differentiating the fanfic from canon on tumblr, except that the canon is weirder.
Crowley does not go down a chute. He goes down a telephone cord after making himself microscopic to pole dance on a pin with shroom-induced backgrounds.
During this his stage name is Disco Tony. Get it king go slay you're making better life choices than I am tbh.
Aziraphale is a biblically accurate angel, and you have all gone to extensive lengths to prove this to me. I understood nothing, but there you go.
It's all very queer, just like the fandom.
Crowley is a retired demon but he still sins by breaking the speed limit.
They eat at fancy restaurants and bicker but like in a sexual undercurrent way.
Crowley gives Aziraphale a private dance that is not a lap dance, it is an apology dance, but not in a kinky way, until it is.
Their haircuts keep changing and range from 'this is acceptable and gay' to 'i let a drunk chimpanzee take gardening shears and a blowtorch to my hair'
It's all ineffably queer my good fellows
Everyone keeps trying to convince me Neil Gaiman is the villain yeah no guys I know it's really you. Y'all be like 'SEASON TWO BROKE ME' and then you're making headcanons to make it sadder yeah I see you mmhm.
There is a final fifteen. It is sad. What is it? No one told me.
The demon turns goats into crows and the angel turns them back and then children are turned into newts (does the angel turn them back? who cares not yall) and the demon was the snake in the Eden garden and everyone's furry game seems to be on point.
There are a rather lot of children. I have not seen them. But I am assured they are there. They are, guys. I assume they were turned into the alcohol Aziraphale and Crowley drink or something.
There was an apocalypse plotline. It was averted. It is not important. You don't talk about plotlines in this fandom, no sir.
Crowley doesn't want to go to heaven. Aziraphale is sad.
The kiss is not nice, just like this fandom. It is queer, just like this fandom. It is sad and desperate and masochistic, just like this fandom.
Aziraphale doesn't want to stay back with Crowley. Crowley is sad.
Season 2 ends. Fandom is sad.
Everyone's sanity is hinging on the promise of a happy ending in season 3. Good luck guys.
Y'all better appreciate this. I can't even boast to my mother about this legacy of mine, hey mum your son has been held hostage kidnapped inducted into a cult adopted by a fandom he's not part of look he's winning at life.
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Love Hotel(Emo!Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader)
warnings: smut, unprotected sex, mirror sex/katoptronophilia, water jet masturbation, alcohol, reader and Nanami are 19+, love hotel
word count: 2.4k
pairings: Emo!Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader
summary: you and Kento struggle to find time to be intimate now that you're both full-fledged Grade One sorcerers who work for Jujutsu Tech, and you lie to Gojo about a mission so you and Kento can have a night alone together. you end up in a love hotel together
a/n: this is sort of in the universe of most of my other Emo!Nanami fics and reader who are sorcerers together. Can be read apart or together with the others :) dividers by the lovely @benkeibear
taglist: @beneathstarryskies @an-ever-angry-bi @seireiteihellbutterfly
@benkeibear @namikyento
@adharadotcom @heyitsd1yaa
@darkstarlight82 @galactict3a.
@erebus-et-eigengrau
@aomi04 @isabelzoldyck
Wanna be part of the taglist? Here's the link!(Please make sure to have an age indicator in your bio plz!)
It’s been weeks since you and Kento have had a moment alone. Ever since becoming full-fledged sorcerers, it’s just been mission after mission. If it’s not missions, it’s training. And if it’s not training, it’s Gojo always hanging off one of you.
It goes without saying, you two were becoming quite pent up. Even just trying to have a moment alone to kiss and unwind was becoming difficult. Most nights, you two settled into your new shared apartment and just ate and went to bed. While you cuddled the whole night through, it was becoming just not enough. You two craved more than just cuddling. You needed affection, kisses and needy intimacy.
So the next time you both knew you had the day off, Kento figured out the perfect way to get Gojo to leave you both alone. He lied effectively about a mission you two were supposed to go on.
“I didn’t hear about this,” Gojo says, his tone accusative.
“That’s because you’re not involved.” You come to Kento’s defense. “It’s just for him and I.”
Gojo frowns, but then he laughs and ruffles both of your hair. He leaves you both, which makes you so proud of Kento’s little fib. It was the perfect way to get your senpai to leave you both alone for the whole afternoon.
After you both get dropped off in the city, Kento takes your hand and leads you down a few dark, damp alleyways. Then you emerge in another part of the city. The lights are a bit more neon, the people look a little stranger and you cling to Kento a little more. He ushers you towards a very dimly lit building.
Inside the building, you realize it’s a hotel of sorts. Kento walks you over to one of the machines and he presses a button. There are photos of rooms showcased on the touchscreen. He scrolls through some of them, then turns to you.
“Which one do you prefer?” He asks you, seeing your cheeks turn pink.
All the rooms seem to have such a kinky vibe to them. Some of them have poles in the middle of the room, one of them has a stage in it, and one of them looks like some sort of wild sex dungeon. Finally one catches your eye. It’s the one with a heart-shaped bed, a jacuzzi tub in the bathroom and a mirror on the ceiling.
“This one,” you tap the screen and select it.
Kento smirks playfully and then he enters his bank card into the machine. He discretely pays for the room and grabs his receipt; the only proof that either of you have even been here.
The ride up to the room is a little tense. But only because you both were so excited to finally have some alone time together. Kento mentions that he paid extra for an overnight stay in the room. He kisses your temple, whispering sweet nothings in your ear.
He unlocks the door to your room with the keycard, and then you both enter. The room is bathed in a red-pink glow from the lights, and it accentuates the décor in here. The floor is a white and gray marble color, with a plush white shag carpet near the heart-shaped bed. The sheets are silky pink and blush red satin, just asking to be rolled around in.
Your eyes widen as you take in the sight of the very reflective mirror on the ceiling. Kento closes the door behind you both, ushering you inside gently. You notice that there is a small kitchenette area close to the door of the bathroom. Walking around, you take in more of the room.
A large flatscreen TV sits in front of the bed, and there’s also a very comfortable looking white loveseat that’s nearby for watching movies or any other activities. You make your way over to the minibar and look inside the mini fridge.
“Make yourself comfortable,” Kento says as he approaches you. “We could try out the jacuzzi first.”
You grab two beers from the fridge and you follow your lover into the bathroom. It’s all pink tiles in here with more of the same red-pink lighting. Even the jacuzzi is heart-shaped, which makes you snort. Kento laughs with you as well. Then he turns on the shower, giving you both a moment to be able to rinse off before you get into the tub.
With both of you rinsed off and your beers opened, Kento helps you into the now filled heart-shaped tub. He turns on the jets, making you moan as they begin to hit your sore muscles.
“This is too nice,” you comment as you rest your head on Kento’s shoulder.
Kento chuckles and sips his beer, “We needed this, honey.”
Both of you sigh happily as you rest in the warm water. The jets work their magic on muscles, loosening you both up. The beer makes you both feel a little more aroused than usual. Kento leans over and he kisses your lips softly, tentatively at first.
Soon you’re leaning in as well, your lips melding with his. He places his beer on the edge of the tub, his free hand coming to cup your chin. It’s not long before you’re adjusting your position so that you’re facing him almost directly. Your thighs open just a bit to allow him to get even closer to you.
That’s when you feel it. The jet hits your thigh and you squeal against his lips. Kento pulls away, a concerned look on his face. You laugh softly, taking a sip of your beer to calm your nerves.
“The jets,” you say. “I bet they could feel really good.”
Kento’s eyes widen and his cheeks redden. He then helps you get into a good position so that the jets are focused on your crotch. One of his hands reaches down to begin rubbing your clit. He presses kisses to your neck, biting and nipping softly.
“How’s this feeling, honey?” He asks you, kissing your neck.
You let out a moan as the jets begin to thrum against your clit, “Fuck, it feels amazing.”
He helps keep your legs spread as the jets work their magic on your swollen nub. The pleasure keeps building more and more, making your whole body shudder. You try to warn Kento that you’re about to cum, but all that comes out is pathetic little whimpers and moans.
“That’s it,” Kento coaxes you, “Cum for me.”
His hands come up to begin kneading your breasts. That’s all it takes for you to come undone. He tugs at your hardened nipples, prolonging the pleasure even more. You cry out his name as the pleasure washes over you; the tightening sensation in your lower abdomen finally releasing as your orgasm hits you hard. The jets continue to thrum against your clit, and that coupled with Nanami’s able fingers has you squirming from the overstimulation.
Finally, he brings you to sit on his lap and he holds you to his chest. Slowly, your breathing begins to normal out. Kento presses soft kisses to your temple and then all down your neck. He then leans in close to whisper in your ear.
“You looked so fucking sexy cumming like that,”
His words make your heart skip a beat. You turn to face him and your lips meet in such a sensual kiss. His hands feel so good on your skin; he caresses you so sweetly. To Kento, you are the most precious thing in this world.
“Come on, let’s go try out the bed.”
He helps you out of the jacuzzi and pulls the plug to let it drain. He grabs the soft, fluffy towels to help you both dry off and then you both slide into the complementary silk robes hanging on the wall. His hand finds yours and he guides you back to the bedroom.
You settle on the bed, looking around the room once more. Kento heads to the minibar and he finds a bottle of champagne. You watch as he uncorks it, and he pours it into two flutes. He comes over to the bed and passes one of them to you. You toast to your relationship and the amazing lie your boyfriend thought up so you two could have this amazing night together.
Kento sits on the bed with you, drinking champagne with you. You two share soft, sweet kisses and chat lightly. There’s no real pressure between you two. It’s just a peaceful time. It’s rare to have this time together and you want to soak it all in and savor it.
Eventually, after a few flutes of champagne, you start to feel needy again. Kento found a channel on the TV that just plays music, and it’s playing some of your favorite songs. Soon you feel him pushing you to lie back onto the bed. He unties the knot of your robe and strips you. Then he takes off his robe, and pulls the covers up over you both.
For a few minutes, the two of you are just making out. Soft kisses turn into more teeth clashing and tongues fighting for dominance. Your legs spread around him, wrapping around his broad frame to pull him in even closer. His hands soothe down your body, stopping only to tug on your nipples. Then one of his hands slips between the two of you, rubbing your clit slowly.
You pant as his fingers work your swollen clit, making your body heat up so quickly. You’re pulling him in for another sloppy kiss; your fingers are buried in his hair and tugging softly. Kento’s cock throbs and twitches to life.
“Shit,” he sighs. “I forgot to bring condoms.”
You swallow hard. While you had gone on birth control for other purposes, you and Kento had decided to use condoms while having sex. It was just a means to be even more responsible. You hadn’t brought condoms with you either.
“It’s okay,” you kiss him. “Let’s do it anyway.”
Kento feels like he could faint from your words. He’s been dreaming of the day he could finally slip into your pussy raw. He never wanted to pressure you into doing anything you weren’t comfortable with, and he always used condoms that felt basically like being inside of you raw, but nothing could even come close to that feeling.
“R-really?” Kento asks, his cheeks and the tops of his ears are pink.
You nod your head. “Yeah, I want to.”
Kento reaches between you, grasping his cock. He’s practically shaking with excitement. He slides the tip between your soaked folds, making you whine and beg for him. Then he brings it to your dripping entrance, pushing in slowly.
“Oh fuck,” Kento whines.
Inch by inch, he enters your warm cunt. It’s so snug and wet and he’s not sure how long he can last like this. He’s panting like a dog in heat as he continues to slide into you until he’s bottomed out. You watch as his eyes cross from the intense pleasure and he slumps against you.
“Too fucking good.”
You gently rub his back, soothing him from the intense pleasure. You have to admit it’s intense for you too, and you never thought it could feel like this. Eventually, Kento pulls himself up and begins rocking his hips. His large hands rest on your hips, pulling you in with every thrust of his hips.
“You feel so good,” Kento grunts. “So fucking good. So warm and wet.”
He leans in to kiss you hungrily. Your tongues roll together as he fucks into you a little faster. When you pull away from the kiss, you look up. This is when you notice the mirror that’s right on top of the bed. You thought you’d be so insecure about watching yourself have sex with your boyfriend, but seeing just how sensual it is, you find yourself even more turned on than before.
The way Kento’s back muscles flex as he fucks you harder just makes you see your man in such a different way. He’s gorgeous when he fucks you like this, but what surprises you is the way you like your own reactions in the mirror. It turns you on and arouses you to see yourself in the throes of pleasure.
“Like seeing yourself like this?” Kento asks in a breathy tone. He looks up behind him, seeing you both in the mirror. “Does it turn you on to watch me fucking you?”
You nod your head, your mind practically blank from being fucked so good and being so aroused. Kento chuckles softly before he pushes your legs to your chest. He’s much deeper in this position, and his cock is hitting your sweet spot dead on this way.
“Cum for me,” he whines. “Need to feel you cumming on my cock.”
He leans down just a bit to spit on your already wet clit, rubbing it in with his thumb. The steady rhythm of his cock inside of you was pushing you closer to that sweet release. The muscles in your groin begin to tense up once more, signaling just how close you are to cumming.
“Ken,” you whimper. “I’m so close.”
He kisses you. “Let go for me,”
He lightly pinches your swollen nub and that’s what pushes you over the edge. Your nails dig into the muscles in his back, dragging down as your walls begin to pulsate around him. Kento’s face is buried in the crook of your neck as he feels his own release becoming imminent.
“I’m cumming,” he whines. “C-can I cum inside?”
“Yes, please!”
He doesn’t need to hear more before his hips stutter. Your eyes flutter back and forth from him and to the mirror above you as you watch your boyfriend go through exhilarating pleasure. His moans are desperate and animalistic all at once as he spurts thick ropes of cum deep inside your still-convulsing pussy.
Once he comes down from his orgasm, he slumps against you again. This time his mouth finds one of your nipples, suckling softly. He huffs a little when you begin to run your fingers through his hair.
“I love you,” you pressed a kiss to his forehead.
He looks up at you, “I love you too.”
Neither one of you will regret lying to Gojo about this night.
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HII!! Idk if your taking requests rn but if you still do,can you please do Bakugou having a emo gf?? I honestly don't know if you still write mha stuffs, so ignore this if you don't!! 🙏🙏
ღBakugou having an emo gf
ʚCont: Swearing, fem! reader
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a/n hi!! idk if you wanted it to be texts or a oneshots or wtv so i went with headcanons!! and yess i still write for mha, my inbox is open if you get creative ;)) also, my conception of emo might but kinda stereotypical so i apologize in advance!!
Bakugou had an emo phase in middle school and you can NAWTTT change my mind. Now that he´s older and more mature, he´s become closeted about this phase of his. But trust, if he hears any type of emo music, he knows deep down in his soul that he´s jamming to that shit.
That is why, in terms of how aggressive he is with people, emos are at the bottom of the list, including you.
Of course, when you first walked into class he was still the abrasive person he is. Nevertheless, it was clear to anyone who had known him long enough, that he treated you with just a little more respect than he did with others.
You never understood it, but you never questioned it either. What little bit of peace there was with the blonde was to remain untouched and unshattered. That is until Mina whispered ideas into your head that Bakugou had a thing for you. At first, you tried to convince yourself that it was just Mina gossiping as always. But that didn´t mean you weren´t just the slightest bit more aware of Bakugous mannerisms towards you.
During his infatuated phase, though he would rather die than call it that, he had walked past your room only to stop abruptly when the muffled music reached his ears. The rythm of Panic! At The Disco was heard through your speakers, your melodic voice humming the lyrics. He´d be lying if he said he didn´t know the songs by heart. He did.
And despite his embarrassment of people having this knowledge, his gut told him you wouldn´t judge. Hence why he found himself knocking on your door.
"Bakugou? Do you need something?" You ask, not having expected the sudden visit.
Why did he come here again? His throat suddenly felt dry and his tongue heavy.
"I heard your music down the hallway, it´s too damn loud" Smooth Bakugou smooth.
"Oh. Is it? I´ll turn it down"
Just as you turn back around, he abruptly speaks.
"I like it" Well that sounded dumb "The group I mean. It used to be my favorite"
If you weren´t surprised before you sure are now. Yet you didn´t dislike it.
"Really?....Wanna come in to listen?"
The friendship stage was blurry to say the least. Neither of you knew whether you were treading a line between friends or lovers. But it felt right.
The respect he held for you from the beginning grew the more he learned about you. Between all the dumbasses and extras he was surrounded with, you seemed to be the one with the most refreshing mind. Your passions and views about the world amaze him to no end and he finds himself learning from you.
Of course, everyone else could see the palpable tension between you. It was clear as day yet neither of you made a move. It was infuriating and your dear classmates could only take so much before they intervened. Luckily, a small push was all that was needed for things to go smoothly.
They went with the classic plan. Making plans with friends only to end up ditching you and leaving you all alone with your now crush. Bakugou caught on quicker than you did. And while he wanted to strangle the idiots, he knew it was now or never, he had to stop chickening out.
"What are we?" He asks out of the blue while walking back to the dorms. He could feel your eyes on him, but he didn´t turn his head, too scared to look.
"What do you want us to be?" You counterask, your heart inevitably thumping in your chest.
"If I tell you will you still stay?" You can only muster a nod.
"I want us to stop dancing around our feelings. I want to take you out. On a real date"
With a grin, you lean close and place a kiss to his blossoming cheek. "I´ve been waiting for you to ask"
The relationship wasn´t all that different. Rather, it was more like an upgrade. He still does the things he does but now under the claim of being your boyfriend. And yes, he came out of the emo closet, though it was pretty transparent. Don´t tell him that though.
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