#I DONT CARE IF NO ONE LOOKS BEAUTY CRAVES EYES BUT WILL EXIST WITHOUT IT

[whythobro]

No no no cause what if Magnifico was a star? Keyword there being ‘was’. For one reason or another he was taken from his parents and brother (star) and stripped of his divinity and marooned on earth, maybe a vengeful family member which could have been a reference to Hercules (HERACLES).

He’s left with some magic and is raised by farmers. One day he finds out about his past, he gets angry and runs off and while he’s gone his home is attacked, he comes back right as the bandits leave and he tries to save his parents but can’t and they die. He runs off and is just kind of there for a year or two before a powerful sorcerer finds him and recognises his magic and so takes him in and trains him.

AND WHEN THE MOVIE HAPPENS HE TRIES TO STEAL STARS DIVINITY OUT OF JEALOUSY AND HE SUCCEEDS BUT STAR CONVINCES HIM TO GIVE IT BACK BECAUSE HE’D HAVE TO GIVE UP AMAYA.

It’s all like:

Star: “You’ll get the whole world and all its power. But it’s at the cost of her.”

Magnifico: *Visibly conflicted* “… I just want to go home.”

Star: “You already are.”

[yesimwriting]

Dying Starlight

A/n: i dont think an audience for this exists?? ik it’s not shadow and bone related, but ive been reading red queen and i wanted to try writing maven and ive been playing with this idea. umm...on the off-chance that there is an audience for this i do think of this as more of a series but i’ll probably end up deleting this lol 

(Series?) Summary: reader is a childhood friend of Mare’s who isn’t officially part of the Scarlet Guard but gets captured by Maven. As a prisoner, she feels like her mind is being messed with as she begins to see a more human side of Maven. The new King tells himself the only thing he sees in her is that she’s a way to get to Mare, but something about her genuiness is infectious. 

-- 

Irony twists things. Right now, the irony that my last thoughts might be about how I wish I had been trusted with a suicide pill twist my impending doom into something almost comical. I’d laugh, but I’d rather not startle the rats in my cell. This has been their home for presumably years, but I’ve only been down here a few hours. 

I scratch the back of my wrist, staring at tired stone walls like they’ve done something to me. I wish I knew what time it was. How long have I been down here? How long has it been since I was separated from Mare? An hour? Three?Each passing minute strikes me like a bullet, but I can’t count them. I’ve never had a talent for accurately feeling the passage of time.

My head aches, frustration and dread tangling themselves in the pit of my stomach. Mare told me the Queen can search through someone’s mind, seeing memories even they can’t remember. What will they do when they see I know virtually nothing? What will happen when they see how close Mare and I truly are? i can’t do anything and the unknown hurts more than my bruised rib. 

The sound of the heavy door that divides the luxury of the castle from the wasteland of the cells creaks. I only let my arms flinch, moving from my side to wrap defensively around my stomach. Dull footsteps echo down the pathway that lead to the cell I’m in. I don’t cringe, not even when the sound of walking stops. 

I was not born into a rich family, but I was born into a proud one. Fear was practically a criminal act in my household. I’ve been trained to suppress all signs of weakness. My eyes don’t leave the stone wall, I mentally trace the pattern of a long crack in a specific rock. It reminds me of the slope of the Big Dipper. 

Will I ever see stars again? The answer leaves a sharp pain in my chest. 

“Mare told me about you.” 

The words jar me, my stomach dropping in revulsion. Mare had trusted him, and here he stands--successful because he’s a traitor. I know what it’s like to be the most overlooked sibling and to crave to change that. I know what it’s like to want to succeed more than you want air in your lungs, but I don’t think I’d ever betray someone. I like to think that there’s a line even the monster in me won’t cross. 

I don’t look at him, partially out of an attempt to protest and partially because I’m afraid of what I’ll see. “She might have mentioned you in passing.” 

His scoff is ridiculous. “She didn’t lie about your sense of humor.” 

That almost makes me wince. His words are too close, too personal. It’s like he knows me. I turn my. head, ready to cut through the uneasy beginning to get to the miserable middle if it brings me to the end faster. 

“You’re here to torment me, not make small talk.” Turning had been a mistake. I regret it instantly. His expression is unforgiving--cold, sharp, and made up of only angles. But that’s not why I stare. I did not expect him to be objectively attractive. The fine slope of his nose, the sharpness of his cheekbones, and the ice blue of his eyes. I need to snap out of this mindset. I’m sure his beauty will not be so distracting when he’s burning me. “Though some might consider that the same thing.” 

He scoffs again, the sound dry. The sneer of his lips does not diminish his attractiveness. The fact makes me loathe him. “I wonder if you’ll still be so prone to humor after you’ve been broken--any information of worth extracted from your thoughts.” 

“Let me save everyone the trouble and just tell you everything that I know now.” My back straightens despite the pain in my ribs. I look pathetic, dirty and in a torn dress. He’s regal, dressed in fine, all black clothing. “I know that Mare wanted to kill you today, I know that she needed a distraction and that her distraction needed to be expendable, which is why I’m sitting in front of you.” I squeeze my hands together awkwardly, a bit of genuine irritation rolling in my stomach. “That’s literally all I know, I’m not even part of the Guard.” I scratch the back of my wrist. If I were him, I wouldn’t believe that, but I’m being honest. How pitiful can one person be that they’re worth more disconnected from the group they work for than as an actual member? “You don’t take that kind of risk for someone that’s only skill set is in thought.” 

I didn’t mean to say that out loud, but I don’t regret it. Maybe he’ll think that my story is so pathetic it has to be true. “You have to know more than that.” 

“The Scarlet Guard only reaches out to me on a need-to-know basis, and anything worthwhile to you is something I clearly didn’t need to know.” In a way, I’m glad I can’t give him anything. “So are you going to kill me with a bullet or do you prefer more flamboyant executions?” My death should be plain. I am human completely--I bleed red and I have no powers. “I do think anything more than a simple death is more trouble than I’m worth.” 

His lips press together oddly, something beneath his expression tightening. “You don’t think your dearest friend will return for you?”

The sarcasm in his voice sparks something in me I thought only my sister could. “I think she has a lot of responsibilities and I wouldn’t blame her for having priorities.” 

His eyebrows draw together. “I think you’re painfully unaware of how attached to you she is.” I press my lips into a thin line. “She’ll come for you.”

Something selfish in me hopes that he’s right. No one has ever wanted me enough to come back for me. My mother wanted perfect daughters that knew how to only think in terms of trapping men with stable careers. My sister did it, but I could never manage, and to my mother that made me useless. 

“If you believe it,” I mumble beneath my breath.

I don’t know if he hears me. I can’t bring myself to care if he did. “For your sake, you better not have lied to me.” 

My back relaxes against the raspy wall, fighting down a grimace as the motion irritates my rib injury. “Cross my heart, Your Highness.” 

I watch him carefully, his expression turning into something much more grim. “A King is referred to as His Majesty.” 

“My father was a prominent war general and my mother only wanted daughters she could use to social climb.” I fight down a grin. “I know what I said.” 

His expression darkens into something bone chilling. “I am the King and you’ll refer to me as such or deal with even less pleasant circumstances.” 

I fight against the urge to cower, picturing Mare’s strength in my veins. There’s weakness in everyone, and if I squint I can see the thin cracks in him. “You have everything--the crown, the power, the support of the people, and it’s still not enough. You won and you still feel like you’re competing.” 

“You don’t know anything,” he seethes, practically growling. 

I shouldn’t press him, but the more he reacts, the more weaknesses are revealed. “I know what it’s like to have a sibling that’s the sun, and no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, you’re always trapped in a shadow.” 

The lighting makes his eyes look almost glazed over. “My mother will be here soon and the truth will be revealed.” 

He can run from me, but not the truth. Cal has nothing, he has everything--the father that never cared for him is dead, and yet he’s still trapped. Our similarities hurt me more than my physical injuries. 

Maven turns, his gaze moving off of me feels like the removal of heavy shackles. “It would do you well to not press me. You’re worth as much whole as you are broken.” 

There’s the strangest hint of something more to his voice. I wonder if he’s speaking to more than just me. “You haven’t won until that voice in your head telling you that you’re not enough is silenced.”

“You’re a powerless girl who isn’t even wanted by a dying cause and couldn’t find a husband to drag her above the poverty line. You know nothing about me, and if you keep pretending I’ll slaughter you in front of your dear friend.” 

He leaves without another word. I fall asleep with my back against the wall and my ribs aching. 

[ryosmne]

Safe Place.

Yakuza! Nanami Kento x gn Reader

Hello everyone, this fic is in collaboration with my dear friend @sunfloweroranges you can read their fic here :D

I kind of changed my writing style for this one, I'm trying out different things so let me know how it goes, feedback is always welcome, that's all from me hope you have a good time reading 💜

Summary: You're clueless

Warnings: mentions of blood, mature themes, mentions of murder and head chopping, language, yandare Nanami if you squint.

Grocery shopping is never fun when you're alone, especially making your way back home in the cold winter months, it gets dark so early.

A slight twist of your gut had made you walk back home in a faster pace. Turning your head every couple of steps, you never saw anything, yet this feeling never left even when you got through the main entrance of your apartment complex.

The elevator was broken once more, and you were already out of breath from rushing back, as you took the first steps up, your next door neighbor, who looked way too scary for your own liking bumped your shoulder on his way down.

Jeez he's in a hurry today.

Mumbling a quick apology, even though he was the one that was at fault, you quickly found the strength to run up the stairs and lock yourself in. Some short of commotion was coming from outside the complex that you didn't really care to hear.

That pink haired guy, your neighbor, who was build like a damn door, always got himself in some short of trouble, hearing him yell profanities or even throwing punches was a far too often occurance.

Why did he have to live right next door?

It's safe to say you did the best to keep the hell away from him, not that he seemed to bother with you, neitherless he was fucking scary.

Kento was ten minutes late, he was never late, except for the days that he had to clean up someone's mess, the days someone underestimated the power he held or the days someone dared speak your name. He wouldn't even tell them 'dont you dare speak their name' or anything along those lines. There was no warning when it came to mentioning yo,u only taking immediate action.

Naturally you were in the dark about all of that, Kento -or Ken as you would often referred to him as- kept you far far away from the darkness of his world. That was his way of keeping you safe and at the same time having you as his personal way out of his work and in his defence he didn't completely lie about his employment. He was an investor, just a bit of a different stock market than what you had in mind.

As far as you knew, Nanami Kento was an extremely successful business man, he chalked up his tattoo covered body as just his preferred style, since he is this good at what he does, he likes to say that his work place doesn't give a damn about his ink covered skin and the expensive gifts that he always pressures you to accept are just another benefit of his high profile job.

"Darling, I hope you didn't start without me." Wrapping your arms around your extremely sweet boyfriend you left a small kiss on his lips watching as the corners tagged upwards in an equally sweet smile the moment your lips left his.

"Of course not Ken, it's Friday remember?" Fridays are the established date nights in, you and Kento cook and dine together. More often than not you end up slow dancing to some jazz, or with you laying on his chest Infront of the fireplace, listening to his heartbeat, talking about life while he strokes your hair until the dawn.

Tossing him an apron, after he -like the gentleman he is- tied yours, you got to work on today's dish: Chorizo carbonara.

"You're never late on Fridays, bad day at work?"

You spoke while slicing some papers.

"Yeah, the stocks are all over the place and it's getting me stressed, but it's our night darling, anything else isn't of importance."

Kento always found a way of distracting you when it came to talking about his day, he is always quite vague and when his palm rested on the small of your back gazing down at you with those adoring eyes, it's hard to keep focused on anything other than him.

"Why don't you tell me about your day love?"

He always asked you that, Kento is in awful need of the calm that the mundane life you live carries. He craves to feel that, he still loves the power he holds over people, the way the mare mention of his name makes others tremble in fear of what the man will do to them shall they not comply to his requests -more accurately orders-

"Thankfully work was pretty good today, I finished grocery shopping so we could cook, I got us that wine you really loved too. The neighbor is being weird again but that's not new, maybe moving out isn't a bad idea."

Everything was like music to Kento's ears untill that last sentence. You had mentioned moving out before, but Kento always found a way to convince you not to. The rent was good, this house is close to your work, he would always reason with you until you changed your mind. He never pushed too hard fearing that you'd suspect something, but you only smiled and ended up agreeing with him.

You see, unbeknownst to you, your weird neighbor is Nanami's most trusted man, he's protecting you twenty four hours a day, even as you walked up the stairs today he dealt with another threat that was headed right your way. No, you cannot move before you know everything, but Nanami can't bring himself to break your bubble, he loves you and you love him, the real him, he would never scare you by letting you take a peek at his point of view. Maybe he should run away with you afterall.

"He doesn't look that bad, love. I'm sure he wouldn't hurt a fly."

Nanami knew he was capable of a lot more than that but it was true, your neighbor was an ally and although he would hurt lots of people, you were on the list of people to be protected and Sukuna took his bosses orders very seriously.

"Besides, my love, anyone would have to get through me first before attempting to lay a finger on you."

With the way his lips moulded on yours and his velvety tone, how could you not believe every single word that just came out of his mouth. Kento would die before letting anything happen to you, that little statement helped bring you comfort.

"You must really love my house Ken, can you pass me the butter?"

The moment your back was turned, Kento let out a breath of relief. That little voice in his head he always pushed away yelled at him to tell you everything, he burried it in the back of his mind once more.

"Can you believe that? I swear she drives me insane- Ken are you listening to me?"

That was weird, Kento always gave you his full attention. Perhaps he was tired today.

"Yes darling, you were talking about that Satoru guy, the one who annoys you at work."

Yeah you were, but that was while you were still eating, about twenty minutes ago.

"Babe, you're tired, let's go to bed, we can pick up where we left off another time, you need to rest."

The habit of staying up all night on Fridays had really stuck, but sleeping when your partner clearly needed to, is very much on schedule although it rarely ever happened.

Getting up from the sofa, tagging at Kento's arm to follow you to the bedroom had Kento irritated at how concerned you grew for him. He still feels you're too good at times, all the time to be exact.

You only heard him sigh before he pulled you back on the sofa, having lost your balance in his sudden move, you landed on top of him.

"Stay with me a little longer my love, I'm sorry I spaced out, I'm all ears for you now."

Another invitation for you to just talk to him, he didn't care about what. Kento loved the tone of your voice, how it changed pitch depending on what emotion you held or what you were talking about. His voice was quite monotone, like everyone else's around him. He had to grow thick skin and throw away all short of feelings, but everything he locked away years ago came rushing back the moment he spilled coffee on you six months ago. You hadn't even complained about the burning sensation on your skin as he helped clean you up, you just gave Kento a smile telling him that everything was fine and these things happen.

In his world they don't, someone can breathe the wrong way and lose their head, all it took was your damn smile and that statement to get him to need something different than what he had. Kento never thought he missed a thing, he found out how wrong he was that very day.

Sometimes he wished he never took the time to help you out back then, but that was only because he didn't know that he'd put you through all this.

"So I'm just sat there in a staring contest over the last price of cake, I won but my eyes still feel a bit dry."

You laughed, Kento stared down at you with a fond smile, your head on his lap and your hands tangled in his, brushing his knuckles and examining every bit of his skin with such care, God you were beautiful all over.

While Kento's hands were very interesting a small detail in the cuff of his shirt got your stomach to drop.

"Ken, is that blood?"

He swore he cleaned up, he always cleaned up before coming back to you, he never missed a single splatter. Maybe rushing home after not one, but two people tried to harm you today put him on edge.

He had missed a single drop. He was absolutely disgusted that even that tiny part of someone who dared to say the name y/n out loud infront of him and even threatened your existence was anywhere near you.

"Sweetheart that's probably tomato sauce from cooking, thanks for pointing it out, you know I hate staining my clothes, I'll go change."

Your meal didn't contain tomato sauce.

Why was your gut telling you that something was off?

Kento seemed a bit tense tonight, was it just a bad day at work?

He never really conversed on his profession. The huge dragon that started from the back of his thigh, ended on his left shoulder covering his entire back was just his 'style'. You swore you heard him talk to the pink haired man who lived next door but he told you he was on the phone. Everything little bit of suspicious behaviour you had previously payed no mind to, came to you. On top of that what was his reason to lie about a drop of blood on his sleeve? He could've said it was a paper cut or something, Why did he lie?

Behind the bathroom door Kento only cursed at him self.

Why didn't he lie better?

[nishimochas]

❁﹝ enha!tegories ﹞

‣ ⒈  enhypen as some of my favorite cottagecore-esque songs.

❁﹝ lee heeseung as like the dawn by the oh hellos. ﹞

“ and like the dawn, you broke the dark and my whole earth shook. i was sleeping in the garden when i saw you. ”

light crept through the windows over your slumbering figure, heeseung's eyes steady over your face, studying every curve, angle, every dip and crevice. a sigh escapes him, content, as his fingers brush over your features in a soothing manner. the soft simper he wore blooms into a smile as your eyes begin to flutter open. you share his smile with a sleepy one of yours and snuggle closer to his frame.

"good morning, sunshine."

the moniker is met with a chuckle as he leans in to press a gingerly kiss on your crown. your arms circle his frane loosely, savoring the warmth. heeseung's heart swells when his eyes meet yours. he knows he hasn't yet seen a more beautiful sight, and he doubts such a sight to even exist in earth.

to wake up next to you for all the mornings of his life, to have you as his first sight with each break of dawn – nothing would ever compare.

“ you were the brightest shade of sun i had ever seen. ”

.

× 🌼 ×

.

❁﹝ jay park jongseong as home by jacob banks ﹞

“ so baby, baby, won't you let me in? i'm knocking on your door so let me in. i just need someone to love, i just need someone to hold. ”

the afternoon had been quaint, pleasant and proper enough for a leisurely nap. you curled up within the blankets as your system drowns out the tv noise, thoughts drifting away. as if in instinct, your hand reaches for the mess of pillows by your side – where jay usually sits, limbs in a tangle with yours as you both doze off. you couldn't hold back a sigh; it wasn't quite like home without him there.

buzz buzz.

you check your phone for the notification. an immediate smile tugs on the corner of your lips upon reading the message.

[ from: jjongddaengie 😎 ]

i'm almost home, baby. wait for me?

and so you set your phone aside and envelope yourself with the soft fabric, fighting the urge to giggle in anticipation. as the white noise of the movie you half paid attention to lulls you to sleep, you enter oblivion in the knowledge that in not very long, jay will come back home and see you as you are. you know you'll be greeted with two arms around your waist and a kiss on the shoulder; and at that moment, you know you'll always find home right where he is.

“ i need someone to kiss goodnight, and to give my heart a home. ”

.

× 🌼 ×

.

❁﹝ jake shim jaeyoon as coffee by beabadoobee ﹞

“ don't stay awake for too long, don't go to bed; i'll make a cup of coffee for your head, i'll get you up and going out of bed ”

nights like these, when it is calm and the winds are gentle, are best enjoyed with a cup of hot coffee. it's become a habit for you jake to lounge on your front porch, each with a steaming cup with hand as you two chat about everything there is under the sun and beyond. this night was not very different; same seat, same sweaters, same mugs, only this time, there was complete silence between the two of you.

you'd expected it to be tense, for an unsettling echo of quiet to descend between you. but much to your surprise, this... this was comfortable.

"jakey?"

"yes, love?"

you breath almost hitches at his answer – no matter how many times he's been affectionate with you, it'll always feel special. different. like there was no other soul in the entire universe who could ever say it the way jake does.

you take a sip from your coffee cup and glance back at him, wearing a proud grin only he could ever give you.

"let's do this more often."

“ won't you come down and get me? i like it when you hold me tight. ”

.

× 🌼 ×

.

❁﹝ park sunghoon as yellow by coldplay ﹞

“ look at the stars, look how they shine for you and everything you do; yeah, they were all yellow. ”

driving out at such an ungodly hour was, prior to being an impulse, something you and sunghoon have given much thought to. it was only when the two of you were still wide awake after having tried everything that you hopped into the car for your late night escapade. a song you weren't familiar with played in the radio station to fill the silence, but you were far too focused on counting the billboards to notice.

"twenty two... twenty three... ooo look, it's one of those ads about billboard ads–"

you roll down the car window to see further out, still counting under your breath each time you pass one by. he glances to his side and sees you; you two looked so cliche, almost straight out of a music video. he pulled over at an empty park and your displeasure was immediately made known.

"hey, i wasn't done counting..."

sunghoon chuckles from the driver's seat and pulls you in by the wrist, lips pressing softly against your temple in the most delicate of brushes.

"you can go back to counting when i'm done kissing you."

“ your skin and bones turn into something beautiful. do you know i love you so? ”

.

× 🌼 ×

.

❁﹝ kim sunoo as strawberry blonde by mitski ﹞

“ i love everybody because i love you – i dont need the city and i dont need proof. all i need, darling, is a life in your shape; i picture it, soft, and i ache. ”

the sun was especially kind today – it's warmth remained watchful over the grass you and sunoo sat on, but through a veil of clouds so as to not be so glaring. the perfect day for a picnic, as he said so himself. he always goes all out for them; whatever you craved for, he had it all. you looked through his basket with a giggle, noticing a few delicacies he doesn't usually bring.

"why macaroons?", you ask while helping him set up the mat and the containers.

"didn't you say you wanted macaroons last week? i thought i should bring some for you! i tried baking them but they didn't turn out very nice–"

his babbling was halted with a macaroon to the mouth, sending you both into a fit of laughter. you'll never get tired of how considerate he is, how much he pays attention to the things you say and how much sunoo truly cares. you popped a strawberry macaroon into your own mouth and rested your temple against his shoulder. now, you couldn't help but wonder: would it have tasted better if he made it?

“ look at you, strawberry blonde – fields rolling on, i love it when you call my name. ”

.

× 🌼 ×

.

❁﹝ yang jungwon as santa monica dream by angus and julia stone ﹞

“ goodbye to my santa monica dream – fifteen kids in the backyard drinking wine. you tell me stories of the sea, and the ones you left behind. ”

it's nearing three in the afternoon and jungwon's just about finished with helping you pack. he ushers the last suitcase out and into the car where your father waits for you. it wasn't difficult to tell that he was trying to avoid your gaze.

"hey..." you take his hand in yours, making him see you eye to eye. there's something quite crestfallen with how he looked at you; you had to go and pursue your dream away from home, he knew that, and he was happy for you. but you knew him better than that.

"i'll miss you, dork."

he could only give you a little smile, but it was more than enough. you look behind him and see the fridge door, battered with polaroids, receipts and letters. reminders of you, so he'll never forget.

you wave goodbye and so does he, not caring at all to wipe the tear streaking down his cheek. he'd miss you so and you all the same, but no matter where you are, or where you'll go – jungwon knows he'll be dreaming of you each and every night.

“ i'm singing songs about the future, wondering where you are. ”

.

× 🌼 ×

.

❁﹝ ni-ki nishimura riki as kiss me by sixpence none the richer ﹞

“ nightly, beside the green, green grass. swing, swing, swing the spinning step, you wear those shoes and i will wear that dress. ”

"hurry, we'll miss the fireworks!"

ni-ki half dragged you through the open venue, clad only in socks and you in his shoes with you broken heels in one hand. you could barely hold your laughter; you'd assume the punch had no alcohol, but given how giddy you were, it wouldn't have been surprising if it were revealed to be booze.

"cinderella! wanna get out of here?", he shouted beside you, the sentiment almost drowned out by the cacophony of fireworks and cheer. you took him by the wrist and maneuvered you two through the crowd. he'd figured that was a yes. you two found a cozy nook under the garden tree, spending the rest of the prom night watching from afar and laughing at his dirty socks.

"man, i'm seriously convinced that thing had alcohol in it." he laughs and nods along, peering over for a better view of your face.

"is that why you're so pink, then? drunk blush?"

immediately flustered, you hurry to cover your warm cheeks with two hands. another laugh escapes him – you almost expected him to tease you. but instead, ni-ki takes your hands away from your face, nudging your chin up so your eyes will meet his. you couldn't miss the smug grin he wore even if you wanted to.

"hey, kiss me."

“ lift your open hand, strike up the band and make the fireflies dance; silver moon's sparkling, so kiss me. ”

❁ :: i'm honestly kinda disappointed in this HSHSB brain go brr, but i hope u guys like it 🥺💕 (edit: i really should have proofread this wow)

[zuffer-weird-girl]

PAL I GOT SOMETHING! We all know Kai is a stubborn ass. But think, when he gets all comfortable with S/o he would be sappy as shit. Only when she cant hear. So could you maybe write something similiar? Kai surely has trust and abandonment issues, so he would be carresing her face, murmuring how his angel is the only light of his life, he thinks she is asleep, and with the cherry on top, he brings her close and murmurs shakily at the verge of tears "just don't abandon me in the dark"

*ugly sobbing while doing 👌*

"Is late. Stop making such a fuss about it, you look like a brat." He said nonchalantly but with a bit of irritation as you stuck your tongue out, eager to finally pass that damn cursed phase of your game.

Mimic betted money on this shit, and you aren't losing 80 bucks again!

"Not today satan." You muttered, not noticing how Chisaki's eyes twitched a bit before he let out a sigh and yanked the control out of your hands.

"No!" You whined, making grabby hands at the already overhauled console "I was almost there!" You got up only to bury your face in his chest, suppressing the urge of smirking at how his body tensed a bit "You're so mean..." you groaned as he rolled his eyes, patting your head once or twice as a signal for you to get off from him.

"Sure. Mean is the right word to use against a yakusa boss."

You put your arms behind your back as you walked chest to him and back to your shared bedroom, smilling up at him.

"I would rather call adorable, handsome, love of my-"

"Hush." He hissed while opening the door as he gave you a glare, ears tinted in pink "You went insane or something to call me such things?"

"Hey, I am your partner. If this is what insane means than yep, totally insane here." He scoffed while rolling his eyes at your smirking self.

"You're ridiculous."

"And~" you almost singed while making your way to him "You love me for it!"

"Atture is the best word to use on this to be honest." He arched one eyebrow at you as you fake pouted, huffing a bit but smilling at noticing the hints that he was smirking.

His cheek bones and that look of his, gave it away as always.

"Fine..." you sighed and plopped down on the bed "Ready to call it night then?"

"I've been calling for the past half hour to go to bed you brat." He growled while you shrug.

"Bets with Mimic are always something to be serious about." He almost face palmed at that.

"You idiot needs to stop bargaining with him. Immediately."

He got into bed and you wished him a good night while he only grunted in return, turning off the lamp as he closed his eyes, which you soon did the same, snuggling your self on the crook of his neck despites his grumpy attitude.

Sleep soon came and you were out like a light...

~

Gentle yet rough fingers danced around the skin of your face... you could feel it.

Yet you didn't opened your eyes, at first thinking it was some of those ultra realistic dreams until you felt a strand of your hair falling, the same hand carresing your jaw and cheek coming to put back on place as a familiar quiet scoff echoed in the room.

"Even sleeping you can still be the incarnation of beauty itself... this is madness." The voice of your boyfriend was so close to your face, his warm breath even bringing you chills from the difference of the temparute of the father cold room.

The voice belonged to Kai, yet it was... different. It was quiet, not filled with power. It was sweet and gentle, not with the usual arrogance or stoicism of his... it was too... soft.

You felt his hand cupping your cheek as his thumb brushed gently over your skin. A rare and quiet chuckle escaped from him and you almost cursed out loud for missing such a sign.

"Heavens (Y/n)... what have you done?" He said as his voice became quieter and quieter, almost as if he was too afraid of wakening you up.

But no. Your Kai Chisaki? Afraid of something?

"Such a despicable creature like me, you made into someone almost too soft to handle with the mafia..." his thumb stopped moving around your cheek to only brush on the slightest on the bottom of your lip "And also make me, out of all people, feel like... are deserved, and believe that a feeling like you gave me... exist."

You wanted to lift your eyebrows and ask what was wrong to him as soon as you notice a little break on his talking, but you remained still, in favor of not ruining his moment... that he clearly did not express it when you were "awake".

"Neither parental love I had. Being throw out on the streets as soon as the incident happened. I was lucky enough to be found by the old man..." by the tone of his voice you could tell that his eyebrows were furrowed, only by remembering that unfaithful day... "And I don't even need to remind the many things you went through only because of me... I took so long to accept such gentle and warm touch, that my stubborn ass simply refuse to have it when you have those beautiful eyes open."

Your heartbeat seemed to stop at that little confession, his hand coming to your hair to untangle some of the knots as his free one replaced the other in your face. And you had to adjust you almost giggled at hearing him swearing.

"... I am pathetic. No matter how much I consider you pure and clean from this world... I still tense at your touch, worry about cleaning and germs. Yet, not only I came to... crave it, but you are the most patient out of both of us angel..." you felt the point of his nose touching your forehead slightly "You deserves so much... yet I am still too selfish to even share the brightness that you bring with the others... this brightness pushed my dark thoughts away... always had, and most probably always will."

You suddenly felt yourself being pulled into his hard and toned chest, his head making home in the crook of your neck as he shakily sighed, clenching on your back.

"Wrap me in your sacred embrace, bathe me with your unconditional love, but don't abandon me in the darkness alone ..." your eyes burned at listening to those words spilling from your boyfriend's mouth, and the urge to cry only intensified when he sniffed and and a certain dampness started to appear on your neck.

The worst? You couldn't move. Since he was opening himself like that because, to him, you were asleep.

He chuckled bitterly as his lips moved in your neck.

"I don't think I could take it that such a divine person like you... left me. Even though you-" you couldn't take it anymore, if he said one more word about this, yourself was going to break down.

How much Chisaki had been boltingdup his emotions? And for how long..?

You pretended to stir in your sleep, stretching your arm to hug him. You got worried at how he quickly silent himself and didn't dare to move a muscle. His body once fully relaxed, now tensed at the threat of you wakening up.

A bit later, some minutes or so, he got just inches away from you, cupping your face in his hand as your faces were not even inches apart.

You could feel his stare at you, and now you could only pray that he still thought you were still sleeping.

He scoffed and you felt his lips in the middle of your forehead then in your lips, soon bringing you his chest again as he combed his fingers in your hair.

"I love you (Y/n)... more than you will ever know." In his voice you could feel his smile on it, making you shut your eyes tight at preventing any tears escaped and fell on him.

He loved you. In his own way he loved you, you knew it already... but hearing him staying so ocassionaly and... peacefully like that, it made your heart burst in joy.

You nuzzled even more to him with a satisfied smile, coming back to dream land at the feeling of your boyfriend's skilled hands combing your hair as the other carresed up and down your back...

Bonus!

You grumbled at feeling the rays of the sun hitting directly at your face. You reached out for the warm chest you so craved for only to whine at only feeling cold sheets beneath your hand.

"Next time listen to me and go sleep on the right schedule." At hearing his voice you immediately smiled, remembering the events of last night as you sitted up on the bed to look at him.

"I swear." He sighed as he put on his gloves and looked at you with those nonchantly golden eyes he had "I am everthing but a babysitter. So I would suggest that you take your sleeping schedules more seriously for once."

He arche done eyebrow as he looked at you, smilling as your gaze never broke from him.

"Are you sick?" He asked nonchantly, but the worry was evident in his eyes, but soon dissapeared when you shook your head, still with that same face "What's that smile for then may I ask?"

You giggled and he only hardened his gaze getting close to you to prove that this was not a joke.

But he got caught out of guard when you cupped his cheeks, caged his legs to bring him closer with your own as your lips made contact with his; since he, luckily for you, hadn't put his mask yet.

His internal gasp was so evident that you wanted to giggle, but you still kissed him passionately, making sure to carres both the back of his head and jaw line as he grunted, finally easing a bit.

Ou parted away to catch your breath as you smiles at the wide eyed man with his cheeks painted in pink. Parting your legs, you rolled to the other side eof the bed, giggling as you make your way to the bathroom.

"C.. Care to explain this bold action and out of no where without a single explanation?" He asked in almost disbelief as you shrugged, smilling sweetly at him.

"Just felt like it. You deserve all the love in the world, Kai Chisaki. And I am making sure I the one bringing it the most possible." His eyes widened a bit before he scoffed and averted his eyes.

"Just get in there already." He said nonchantly ,gaze to the window and back toward you "We dont have all day."

You nodded and opened the door, only peaking at it to see him touching his lips with his gloved hand befor ehe dropped it with a sigh, a very very quiet chuckle as he shook his head.

You finally saw it, the one scene you've been craving since last night. Chisaki's smile.

And you were the one who did that. And surely you couldn't feel more special than you were feeling like now.

[wrestledwiththegods]

I see you do yandere requests and 💦 so what do you imagine the darker papas and Copia are like?

Okay. So. Without going too deep into it, in the time between me writing my original rules, and getting this ask- I had a long and meaningful conversation with a friend about yandere and how a lot of its hallmark traits resemble stereotypes of certain mental illnesses. How this has been harmful to those groups, the stigma, etc. Please know this is not me talking down about your ask or saying you cannot enjoy that content, but I've decided to not write that specific thing for my hcs.

That being said, I am still MORE than happy to write villainous or "darker" hcs that dont involve that specific "obsessive" yandere feel. If that makes sense.

Sorry I hope you still enjoy this!

Also note: most of these have multiple outcomes depending upon certain factors. Ill be tagging anything villain or "darker" as darkau so people can blacklist!

Papa Nihil is a mad king type of villain. It's his world, baby, and maximum hedonism is the goal. He may be older but that does not at all stop him from seeking pleasure even at the risk to his own health. Fucks everything that moves. Holds parties to an extravagant degree. Definitely the kind of bad guy to monologue about past exploits and deeds with the turn of his hand like they weren't horrible things to do. We all (read: other people who aren't him) have to make sacrifices for the church. When he first sees you, you seem like a fun new toy, so to speak. "Cute" is the first word to come to mind.

Likely he first tries to buy your affections. A wolfish smile on his face as he asks if you want a taste of the good life. You two could have some fun. Yet even if you say yes, he soon finds its not enough. Why? He asks himself with a frown. He tries harder, takes more of your time if you let him. You get pulled away from work to have meals with him. He actually asks personal questions about *you* that normally he wouldn't give a shit about in a plaything. But you're not just one of those silly siblings of sin he plays around with.

He hasn't felt this way in a very long time. Its the most serious he's felt in a long time. He still wants to fuck around and basically be his worst self, mind you. But he wants you to be at the top with him. You two can burn brightly together, taking in the best of what his awful actions have bought you. This is if you say yes. If you say no… he smiles. No hard feelings! You'll never be forced to do anything you don't want. It's like he turned off his personality at the drop of a hat. You'll still get gifts after that. Feel his eyes on you around the church. The parties get louder, his screwing around more apparent when you walk in a room. Still, you'll feel his focus on you and nothing else. Almost like he's anticipating for you to change your mind. He'll be waiting.

Papa I - Papa I has always been assumed to be the least threatening of the Emeritus family. He likes to garden, kept to himself after getting off stage. Much of his real "work" is private, you see. Whether it's preparing a poor lost lamb for a ritual after they had betrayed the church for some personal gain. Or slowly and intricately cutting into their skin sigils for the Morningstar. Hes even been known as the best if you need a torturer (although thankfully it is rarer in these days).

You probably take his notice when you express interest in one of his many poisonous plants- lily of the valley. Only if ingested, he tells you. But if you think those are beautiful, he has a lot more he can show you- his private collection.

Its shortly after that you find your duties reassigned to his office. Its out of nowhere, but definitely a step up. The way he phrases it to you is that he needs more help with the garden as one of his previous assistants needed a change of pace. And from what he's heard of you plus your interest, you seem perfect for the job! Really, he just craves to be beside you. Listen to you chatter as you both work the soil, see the sweat roll down your neck on hot days-

The difference between Papa I and everyone else on the list here is that he probably won't make a grand move or gesture. He pines. Hopes that you'll see his feelings and his darkness and love all of it. But deep down he knows how unlikely that is. That one day he'll show you the beauty of ritual hands on. See the blood glisten oh-so-beautifully on your skin. He still sighs happily thinking on it.

If you never express feelings for him, he basically devotes himself to making your life better, in his perspective. Changes your work schedule so its timed well for you to get a good night's rest. Looks out for things you might *need.* If there is anything you want to learn, he's more than happy to show you himself or help you get the resources you need. When it might get bad is when someone expresses interest in you, or you to someone. Ah… well. They're just not good enough for you. Not in his mind. He'll tell you rumors he's heard. Talk to them directly to get them to back off. He has an entire checklist in his mind that they have to meet. Pretty much no one will.

If someone does (its possible but unlikely), however, he feels his heart break. He still pines. And longs. But he lets you go to that person. After all, no matter what horrible things hes done, he wants you to be happy. His heartache is worth that.

Papa II- Papa II as a villain is actually a lot closer to the steteotypes and rumors about him normally- ruthless, cold, and seemingly doesn't care about others. He has this anger deep in his core that is never fully expressed. Truly, he is a sadist in that he usually enjoys the pain of others at his hands. Likes helping out on those rare occasions torture is a thing with Papa I in the lower underground sections of the church. Always seems like hes looking for someone to punish, and usually in a very unpleasant way. Yes, this has extended to death if he deems the "crime" severe enough. The sadism extends into the bedroom for harsh "games"- however he's not a monster when it comes to sexual partners. Still gives them aftercare, even if its a tad on the unfeeling side and more out of obligation.

It probably wasn't just one thing that put you in his sights. He noticed you one day probably doing something kind and kept running into you. He likes picturing your heart racing when you see him, like prey in the face of danger. Over time he starts developing a fondess that he can't quite deny. It's strange. Its been so long since he's genuinely felt this way about anyone, he doesn't know how to react at first. So he pulls out some stops. You get letters, at first, delivered by a ghoul. Later they come with expensive gifts he thinks you'll look good in or enjoy. You should wear it. It pleases him so much to see wear something he got you. Its sort of a subtle claim in his mind. He does expect replies delivered to a certain ghoul or place. Eventually the ghoul comes and there isn't a letter. You're being summoned.

He asks you straightforward to be his prime mover. He's honest in his intentions that he wants you exclusive only to him. He would give you the same if you asked. In fact, he would give you almost anything if you asked. At first this might all seem business but you might notice the slight flush in his cheeks, the unusual hesitation in his voice- little tells. Also the fact he's never asked anyone to be his prime mover, as far as you know. If you say yes, you find he's more gentle when its just the two of you. He has this warm smile in bed you'll catch. He kisses your forehead softly and its this aching tenderness. When others are around, no one would ever know.

If you say no, you are dismissed and he thanks you for your time. Its as if you don't exist to him after that. He just… walks past you like a ghost. Won't acknowledge you if you were to say anything, though I certainly wouldn't. Basically the walls he let down for a brief moment are back up and reinforced. It hurts to see you around, but hes stronger than that. There are things to do in the church. He'll take out these feelings on someone else.

Papa III- As a villain, Papa III is a siren. He's beautiful, says all the right things and pulls lost souls down to the depths with him. On a quick glance, he just seems like someone very devout to the principles of the church and/or hedonistic party guy. His favorite thing to do is lure new people to the church, have them do horrible things and then offer shelter from the other world who will no longer accept them. All with a cute wink or a few silver laced words. This applies to his relationships. He moves fast and likes whoever is interesting at the time- platonic, romantic, alliances. If he decides you're not fun anymore, you get a kick to the curb if the former. The latter usually just ends up to some horrible fate. He thrives on people wanting him so badly they would do anything.

Which is why you as a concept is frustrating. Likely he's already picked you up as someone to have around as a casual fuck or in his "entourage", so to speak. He doesn't fuck around when he wants someone. But you've lasted so long, held his interest. There's a shitty little mercurial part of him that keeps denying what should be obvious. Some days he thinks he'll get rid of you in the morning. Other days he thinks how he can't live without you. He probably has his epiphany when someone else suggests it might be time for you to go. His reaction is filled with anger and aggression. The person seemingly disappeared the next day.

Suddenly he'll be a lot more affectionate. Act like you're his partner in how he conducts himself instead of a follower. All his other sex partners are dumped but not replaced. He asks you be exclusive and practically fucks you to oblivion when you agree. He took after his father in the wolfish smile department. That's what you get from him if you start questioning any of this. Why wouldn't he? You're his favorite. He loves you. The truth of the matter is, even if you didn't love him back, as long as you don't betray him- it stays like this. He adores you and wants you at his side.

If you had answered no to any of it in the first place, he would have gone on without a thought. Oh well!

Papa Copia- Copia is pulling all the strings. He has been for quite a long time. That's why he's papa now, no? Everything and everyone is bent to his will, at least for now until they need another reminder. He's had others killed or just plain framed to get them out of his way. But through it all, the shy and incredibly awkward mannerisms he exaggerated to put peoples guards down, were the most real around you. In gatherings in the church he'd find himself staring, quiet and calculating. He'd slip into fancies about what it would be like to have you romantically. Something about you makes him feel… like an ordinary man. The vulnerability made his heart race and dangle over an imaginary precipice.

Once the new Papacy is official, he comes to you, privately. No, you're not in trouble, he smiles and gives a nervous laugh. He has a proposal. He wants you to be his prime mover. His jewel above all others. If you accept, you'll be treated like royalty in the church. Hanging on his arm at events where no one would dare to touch you or speak ill of you. Sometimes when you're alone he just likes to hold you. Out of all the terrible, rotten things on this earth, you're actually his. Once he realizes he can trust you, he tends to have more vulnerable moments. Things he's probably never told anyone. No matter how stained his hands, he will make sure you are never hurt.

However, you're free to tell him no- He'll be shocked, perhaps try to charm his way. If you still say no, he leaves to think on it. As much as it pains him, if he cannot have you, he would rather not see you at all. He's not going to kill you or hurt you though, no- you might think so for a moment when you're pulled into his office with Imperator behind him. Instead he tells you with some regret that you are to be transferred to another church. He'll miss you, as will the members of the main church of course. But you're needed elsewhere. That's it. As if it was just routine. The next week you leave and he watches you from a window, something in his chest aching. You are his soft spot. And he can't risk having that exposed if he can't have you.

[hufflautia]

hI this is a tOTALLY ANONYMOUS PERSON ASKING. and i am asking u to answer everything on here😌

lmajfniasnf yall i forced menna to send me this ask and i was kinda kidding but also a bit serious but also kinda kidding- ok anwyas here we go 

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed? closed 

(2) Do You Have Freckles? no 

(3) Can You Whistle? yes

(4) Last Song You Listened To. “Needed Me” by Rihanna

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour? grayish green

(6) Relationship Status. in love with loki<3! 

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now? cold, my fingers are cold and menna knows this 

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky? no i did not, quite the opposite actually! 

(9) How Many Followers? around 650 

(10) Zodiac Sign. taurus

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour? brown

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily? yea

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower? usually 

(14) What Books Are You Reading? no book bc i have no brain cells 

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14. 

“i cannot imagine,” replied the scarecrow; “but we can go and see.” -the wonderful wizard of oz! i forgot i had that book, i got it from library for school last year but then quarantine hit and i couldn't return it bc the library closed 

(16) Favourite Anime? i barely watch anime, so i guess “Attack on Titans”, being that its one of the few animes I've watched

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of? my math teacher 

(18) Do You Collect Anything? only the souls of the innocent. also chapstick. 

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch? wontons that fucked my stomach up bc the meat was not cooked properly :D don't we love that?????????????!!!!!!

(20) Do You Dance In The Car? not rlly 

(21) Favourite Animal? dog 

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics? no 

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed? usually 11 or 12- depends on day

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now? no 

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean? pool 

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog? clandestineloki

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water? i don't care as long as its safe

(28) What Makes You Happy? my siblings, my best friends, loki, tom hiddleston

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

i saw this and thought it was a good fit but then i realized it was too calm so

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music? without

(31) Dogs Or Cats? DOGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be? yellow 

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox. i don't care

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean? I've never swam in a lake before, so lake

(35) Do You Believe In Magic? yea

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing? gray

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue? no 

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It? depends

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You? yes 

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now? of course, loki will always be an obsession of mine bruh 

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly? nO BC IM SCARED OF BUTTERFLIES 

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People? yes:’( 

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams? of course

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes? yes 

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry. ParaNorman

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds? sunflower seeds

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be? the neighbourhood

(48) Are You A Picky Eater? kinda 

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper? eh 

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning? kinda 

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write? yes 

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud? depends on mood

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents? wrap 

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up? sleepy hallow ft foushee- deep end freestyle 

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather) winter?? 

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now? l o k i (my original answer was warmth but its basically the same thing) 

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed. 

(58) What Is Your Gender? female

(59) Coffee Or Tea? tea

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About? nope, i finished it on Friday and Saturday like a bad bitchhhhhhhhh

(61) What Is Your Sexuality? bisexual

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning? depends on day 

(63) Favourite Pokemon? squirtle i guess

(64) Favourite Social Media? insta 

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories? they're fine 

(66) Do You Get Homesick? kinda 

(67) Are You A Virgin? ill leave it up to ur imagination bitch (MENNA IM SO SORRY IM NOT CALLING U A BTICH IM JUST SAYING THAT IN GENERAL) 

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now? i forgot the name, but its white and fancy and from the same brand 

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm that is a very good question, probably the motel 

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life? AHAH depends on what u mean by “still in my life”!!!!!!! i guess technically yes, but I've already cut off those bitches in my head 😌 manifesting it into existence <3 

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters? avatar 2 

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex? i don't have one 

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now? “not you, i didn't wanna hurt you”

(74)  What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest? brown bc if i say any other color, its probably a yt person and also brown be smexy

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set? yes, yes 

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate? honey buttered biscuits 

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone? among us, maybe Minecraft 

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not? no bc i don't know how and i would call for someone else to help 

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?probably bc I'm a hermit

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network? amsifnda this is ME ur talking to 

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People? yes kinda, unless they're awkward (aHEM BREAKOUT ROOMS WITH NEW BUT AWKWARD PEOPLE-) 

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them. i used to but not anymore 

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?  i want it closed but the person i share the room with leaves it open bc they say we’re gonna fuckin suffocate if we leave it closed and i hate it bc ✨trauma✨! DONT WE LOVE TRAUMA??!?!?!?!??!?!?!? :D............

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today? i baked biscuits, i did college stuff, i showered

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed? usually mismatched pjs 

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now. chapstick, natural skincare serum, lotion, face masks

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person? day 

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc. don't have any

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

a snake chased me and it was weird as fuck

(90) Favourite Soda Drink? don't have one 

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite? people laughing, violin and piano, my friends voices, my siblings voices

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More? SWEATS

(93) How Do You Look Right Now? comfy 

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You. showering

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want? maybe an important quote? “dont trust owls” imprinted on my face

(96) Favourite YouTuber? stephanie soooooooooooooooooooooo 

[ficsandcatsandficsandcats]

*tosses coin to my writer, o valley of plenty* if I may get a little Jask fic where the reader is cursed to be extremely ugly, and is ashamed and hides in a cloak/helmet/whatever to hide her face. Obviously shes in love with him, but theres no way he would ever love someone so hideous. Inevitably, one day someone sees her without the mask, (I dont care who, it can be anyone, even Jask) and they end up talking feelings and shame and all that good stuff.

Fandom: The WitcherPairing: Jaskier x ReaderWord Count: 2,236 Rating: Ga/n: I love the concept of a reader being cursed and bonding with Jaskier over emotions instead of the usual “you’re hot, I’m hot, let’s fuck” (though my catalogue supports that I am not against this particular trope at all). I had a bit of a dilemma when trying to figure out how to approach because I am very cognizant of the way ugliness is socially constructed and I didn’t want to put a bunch of features on blast that someone may recognize in themselves and feel shitty about. Fanfic should either make you happy or sob or sigh but it should never make you feel bad about yourself. So I put a bit of a spin on it and I hopethat’s ok. I think I’ve still got the core of what you’re asking for here and I hope I handled it well. Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk.

There were those who spurned fairytales. They dismissed the stories of fairy godmothers and curses as children’s tales, moralistic tools for discipline. You knew better. You knew all too well how real fairy godmothers were, and how vicious they were when their charges were mistreated. You’d never been able to glean from your father what act he committed to enrage the fairy so but you knew the fallout. Your mother died in childbirth and you, against all odds, stubbornly clung to life and survived. Another punishment had to be handed down and the curse was placed. When you looked in the mirror you saw someone plain. Features indistinct and uninteresting, a canvas of a person. 

You were the lucky one. When others looked at you, they saw the face of the ugliest creature their imaginations could conjure. The fairy had been clever, knowing all too well that beauty was in the eye of beholder and that the only way to ensure your misery and loneliness was to make sure that every eye that beheld you saw something so uniquely gruesome to their own taste that they could not look past it. Your father was included in this and though he denied it you knew between that and losing your mother he was not able to feel or express love for you as he would have been if you weren’t so repugnant in his eyes.

You took to traveling and healing, still clinging to life like you had in your infancy, still determined to fight for your space in the world. Travelling meant you never had to get to know anyone too well or get too close. You’d tried using paints as other ladies did if they wanted to change their appearance but this only seemed to intensify the revulsion you inspired. You ended up wearing a heavy, hooded cloak and a kerchief about your mouth for extra measure. You were an intimidating figure but you tried to balance this with a soft voice and greater skill in healing. If you could offer something to people, you could briefly get the interaction you craved. But you always kept travelling and you rarely ran into the same person twice.

Until Jaskier.

You met him the way you met most people; providing a service. He’d come by your wagon in a rough state, explaining as you cleaned up his wounds that he’d gotten into a disagreement during his performance the night before. He was charming and kind, only asking about your odd attire once and then leaving it be when you made it clear you didn’t want to discuss it. He paid you more coin than you would have asked and you felt grateful that you’d had the chance to meet him and knew it would remain an encounter you kept close to your heart the rest of your days.

And then you saw him again. This time he caught you unawares, out on a very rare excursion away from your wagon to get some supplies. You’d never had someone see you a second time and look so happy about it. He joined you on your shopping, haggling with the shop owners and asking you for advice on the songs he was writing. He tried to get to know you a bit more, asking about how long you’d been traveling and why you’d chosen healing as a profession. It was easy to talk to him and you almost forgot he couldn’t see the burden you hid beneath your wrappings. He walked you back to your wagon, even going so far as to help you up into it, his hand grasping yours lightly to support you. Your touch starved skin tingled for hours in the spot his hand had been.

The third time you saw him was the worst day of your life. You’d known you were taking a risk by leaving the wagon without the hood and mask but you tried to convince yourself that you were only going down to the river for a moment to bathe. It was early winter and you knew no one would be around, smartly tucked up in their houses with their loved ones and fending off the frost. The water stung your skin but you enjoyed the sensation, happy to be free of the heavy clothes for these moments.

And then you saw him.

You clamored out of the river but you’d only pulled on your dress, still scrambling for the cloak when he stopped in his tracks. Confusion followed by recognition followed by even more confusion washed over his face and you felt your heart break as he cautiously approached.

“Y/N?” he asked. There was no point in pretending, the cloak and kerchief were in hand.

“Jaskier,” you said. You stood across from each other in silence for what felt like ages. You weren’t sure what you were expecting him to do. Not everyone who saw you was cruel, some were just afraid which was almost worse. Jaskier just looked confused and intrigued. His eyes kept traveling over your face like he was trying to commit it to memory.

“Say something,” you said finally, your voice choked with repressed tears. He walked towards you slowly as though he were trying not to spook a horse. By the time he reached you the tears fell from your unblinking eyes. You kept looking for the moment he would turn. The revulsion that would shatter the lovingly preserved memories of him forever. He reached out and brushed away the tears and then reached down and took the cloak from your hands. You stood unmoving as he gently wrapped the cloak back around you, lifting the hood to cover your half-frozen hair. He held the kerchief in his hand but didn’t cover your face, just fidgeted with it as he worked to form words.

“So this is your deep secret,” he said. You nod, unable to form words.

“I’m disappointed.”

The words broke your heart.

“I thought it would be that you were a murderer or a dangerous fugitive,” he continued.

“What?”

“Well, I mean, unless, are you?” he asked.

“No,” you answered.

“Ok so you wear the cloak and the kerchief and the layers and things because…” his voice trailed off, leaving the question open for your answer.

“Because I’m hideous,” the words are like ashes in your mouth but you’re accustomed to the taste.

“According to whom?” he asked. You scoffed incredulously.

“Everyone. Literally everyone. That’s how it works.”

“That’s how what works?”

“The curse.”

“You’re cursed? How fascinating.”

His words anger you and you fear that he’s mocking you, that maybe the kindness he’s shown is just an act and that this a fresh way to experience cruelty. You thought you’d seen them all.

But you tell him the story. You tell him about the curse and your mirrorless childhood and the moment you saw your face and the worse moment when you began asking people to describe you and learned the true nature of the curse, far beyond the loss of a mother or a plain face. You don’t know when you both sit on the ground but at some point you’re there next to each other, leaning against the wheels of the wagon as the words continue to tumble out of you like a dam that’s finally broken. No one has ever heard this much of you, seen this much of you, or sat this long with you in your life and you stop caring how he’s going to react at the end. This isn’t about him anymore, this is about you releasing all that you’d carried and all that you’ll carry with you for the rest of your life. When you’re done you notice he’s taken your hand at some point and his thumb is softly rubbing soothing circles around your knuckles.

“So now this is my life. I stay hidden for my sake as much as everyone else’s. I heal because it’s better than sitting locked up in a house all my life and because it helps me feel… well, just that I suppose. It helps me feel. I would rather feel those brief moments of connection than stay numb my whole life,” you say. You’re startled to see there are tears in his eyes and he pulls you into a hug, not sure if he’s comforting you or himself but you hug him back though you’re long out of practice.

“I’m so sorry,” he murmurs into the hood of your cloak, “I’m so, so sorry.”

“Everyone has their curses I suppose,” you mumble, a little embarrassedand uncertain how to respond.

“Yes but the worst part is it’s all so stupid. So people find you ugly, so what? What could that possibly have to do with your worth as a person?” he asks.

“It’s easy to say that when you’re beautiful,” you say bitterly.

“Beauty doesn’t secure your place in people’s lives. It sure as hell doesn’t make them want you around either,” he says. “But tell me you realize this can’t keep on forever.”

“What do you mean?” you ask.

“Well this… lonely existence, it’s miserable. No offense. Even you said as much. Are you really going to just hide yourself away forever?”

“I didn’t… I don’t see any other option.”

His hand is warm as it gently cups your face and your heart nearly leaps out of your chest.

“Take me with you,” he says.

“What?”

“Take me with you. I make a better travelling companion than most think. And I can help! Not with the healing and such but… listen, I had a friend who was treated much the same as you describe and I was able to help… bridge the gap between him and the people around him,” he says.

“How did you do that?”

“I wrote a song. Now, I’m not suggesting I write a song unless…” his voice trails off and he waggles his eyebrows winningly but your stony face is answer enough.

“Yes that’s what I thought. In any case with me by your side your loneliness is eased and if being there doesn’t communicate a more welcoming message I can at the very least defend your honor.”

You laugh, the sound foreign to your ears.

“And how will you do that?” you ask.

“I… will figure that out!” he vows.

“Can I ask you something,” you ask, growing serious again and avoiding his eyes.

“Anything.”

“What do you see? When you look at me? What do I look like?”

He considers the question and then pulls out a journal and quill from his travelling bag. You try to lean over and see what he’s doing but he pulls the journal away from your sight, tsking at you and telling you to be patient. Your stomach twists in knots as he glances between the journal and you and just when you’re about to lunge for it, he makes a final flourish and hands you the book.

A sob wracks through your body the moment your eyes meet the page and a trembling hand covers your mouth.

“I’m not an excellent artist but I don’t think it’s so bad,” Jaskier says, concern furrowing his brow. You can’t form words for a while, the jagged sobs seemingly endless as Jaskier rubs your back, confused but trying to be supportive until your sobs break into something that sounds a little less heartwrenching and then breaks into laughter. You look at him, eyes shining with tears and something else, something a bit more hopeful and new.

“It’s me,” you whisper, pointing to the drawing. The drawing of the face you saw in your reflection as a child, just older. The face no one has ever seen until this man who’s looking at you like you’re insane but also very relieved that you’d stopped crying. Well, not entirely, but they seem to be happy tears now.

“Yes I know,” he says.

“No, Jaskier, Jaskier, it’s me,” you can’t explain what this means just yet. There aren’t words and you aren’t sure you understand yet yourself.

“I see you,” he says, wiping away some of the tears again, leaning in closed to rest his forehead against yours, “I see you.”

There are those who spurn fairytales. They dismiss the stories of destiny and of a love that cannot be repelled by curses or the weight of a life heavy with trauma. You know better.

[connordavidscamera]

Falling in Love | Connor Brashier

A/n: this is a repost from my Shawn account!! This is my piece and is not stolen.

Summary: you just can’t believe how in love you are with your fiancé.

Warnings: fluff

Word count: 1.8k

***

Staring at my fiancé from across the room, I still can’t help but think I’m dreaming. Never in a million years did I think I would be able to keep this man interested long enough for him to even want to marry me. But here we are a month into our engagement, at our party with all our friends and family, and I still think I should wake up any second now.

I knew I was a goner the first time he kissed me - when the whole world stopped existing until we pulled away for the much needed oxygen to find its way back to our lungs. It was almost too perfect, the way his lips curved against mine, the way his hands cradled my face like that was its rightful place - since that day, it has been. I’d never understood what people meant when they said sparks flew when they kissed someone. But I understood that day.

Our relationship was never rushed. We took everything slow and steady (even though people had their opinions about how long it took us to go public on his insta, or how long it took for us to say I love you. Except, hi, that’s no one’s goddamn business, but go off, I guess.) And I’ll admit, it did take longer than expected for either of us to say those three words to each other - eight months, actually. But you could feel the love in the relationship even without them. It was in the way he always picked up the phone when I called, no matter the timezone. It showed when he would come back from tour and he’d come to my apartment just to fall asleep on my chest because my heart beat lulled him to sleep. And how his hands always found their way to lock with mine whether we’re walking to the car, or dancing in a crowded club, or eating dinner and we’re sitting on opposite ends of the table, so he reaches over and it’s like that cutesy couple thing you see in all the movies. We didn’t need the words to feel them.

And just looking at him and his nonchalant attitude, no one would think that he had a romantic side. And they definitely wouldn’t guess that for our first six dates, before he finally asked me to be his girlfriend, he sent me flowers the next day. And then when we started actually dating, little love notes would just pop up everywhere. Like when he slept over and would wake up before me, I’d find a sticky note on my bathroom mirror that would say something like “Your smile is the best part of my day.” And there have been a few instances where I wasn’t feeling my greatest and he just showed up hours later - seeing as these moments only seemed to happen when he was off on tour - and he’d cuddle me on the couch while we watched shitty rom-coms until I felt better. And it may not be a big deal to anyone else, but when he talks to me, or listens to me talk, his eyes are always trained on me, and I think it’s kinda cute.

And he’s the most caring person. Not just with me, either. He looks after his own. His brother got in a fight one time and Connor was there instantly to patch up his wounds and give him a place to stay so he wouldn’t have to face their mom. Another time Alessia fell coming off the stage and he sprinted to get her ice for her swollen ankle. He made sure to check on her every thirty minutes or so, even though he was working and couldn’t do much for her then. And he is always, always there when I’m sick to my stomach, or sick of life. He’s there drawing hearts and smiley faces over the problem area with his finger, whether it be my stomach, or back, or my mind. He takes care of his own and that to me says everything about our future.

And this boy, Jesus Christ, he is so creative. I’ve never known anyone whose mind works like his. He can see a plain brick wall and immediately his brain clicks and it’s suddenly turned into an aesthetic Shawn’s next shoot. And he doesn’t just focus on faces, he goes and he gets the beads of sweat on Shawn’s hairline, and the rings on his fingers. And he edits his videos in such a way that you can’t possibly watch it only once and feel like you’ve seen everything. It’s fast paced and beautiful and I could watch him edit for hours on end and never get bored. The way he layers photos on top of videos and how he knows just  the right time to make the music swell in a scene. He’s talented and I hope he knows I think so.

He’s so random too. I never know what to expect with him. We can lay in bed while he’s stroking my hair, pulling me to sleep when he asks, “What if cows screamed when you milked them?” Or, “You know, Popeye ate a lot of spinach, but I don’t think that’s the real reason he was so strong. He had to be taking steroids.” One time he came into the room at 3 in the morning, woke me up and asked, “When you were a kid, did you have those suction cup ball things that you would throw at a wall or a window and they’d just stay there?”

“Connor, I’m trying to sleep.”

“I know, but this is important.”

“Why?”

“Because I just bought a dozen of those and a dozen of those sticky slappy hand things.”

And he’s spontaneous (not just in the things he buys off Amazon at 3 AM). There have been many occasions where he has called me up and told me to pack an overnight bag because he wanted to go to the beach or Disney or because he found this bookshop in Nevada that he thinks I’ll enjoy. And then of course there are the more “extravagant” trips he likes to take at random points in the year. We spent last Christmas in the Bahamas because he wanted to wear shorts on Christmas day and he couldn’t do that if we were going to a family Christmas party apparently. Another time we flew to New York because I said I was craving something from this one restaurant we went to last time we were there. He doesn’t wait a second. If I mention wanting something, we’re gone in hours, or it’s already ordered and on it’s way. There is no way to fully know what his next move is gonna be and that keeps the relationship exciting.

And he sees things so vividly, remembering them in soft light, sometimes though in overexposure. He tells stories- AMAZING stories - through the lens of his camera. He puts everything into perspective in such a way that you can’t picture it any other way. You can’t see Shawn on stage and not immediately think of the thousands of girls and women crying because they’re in the same room as him and he’s there and he’s beautiful. And you can’t see him running to hug his fans without seeing the pure elation from the ones he touches. Connor gives you the pieces to make one whole and leaves nothing out, not even once. He never strays from the real story he’s telling, although he might go into a few others while doing so,he always finds his way back.

And despite his resting scowl, he’s not a fighter. He puts off this “I dont give a fuck” type of vibe, but he’s a softy. Until someone says something they shouldn’t. It’s only happened twice. When we were out with friends and I was getting us a couple waters from the bar. This man, who was way too close to me, tried to buy me a drink, his hand playing with the straps of my dress. I was uncomfortable, but I couldn’t find Connor in the crowded space and I had nowhere to escape to when he started getting even more touchy. And then I heard it, the unmistakable sound of skin hitting skin. “Come on, we’re going home.” He said roughly into my ear and he pulled me away, out of the club. Only for him to be Connor again, my Connor. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you? God, I oughta kill him. Can I get you something?” I just shook my head and wrapped my arms around him. He let me. Of course he did.

The other time was early on in the relationship. We were hanging out with his brother and some of his friends from school. I don’t really know what happened, but one of Dylan’s friends said something about me. Connor told me later it had to do with him having me in his bed while he did awfully dirty things to me. Con went off on the younger boy, his face red with anger. He looked like he would blow steam out of his ears at any second. Dylan and I had to pull him out of the room, and let’s just say, he and I don’t go anywhere near that guy anymore.

“You’ve been staring at me for a while now, sweetheart.” Connor said, suddenly at my side, his voice low in my ear. “You’re giving me bedroom eyes. Can’t take care of you with all these people here.”

I hum, finding his fingers to lace mine through. “Hmm… that’s never stopped you before.”

“No,” he presses a gentle kiss to the side of my neck. “But we are kind of hosting this party. So it would be rude to just disappear for 20 minutes.”

“Who said it would take that long?” I giggle, connecting our lips in a quick peck.

He hums into my skin, “Later, kid. When I have you all to myself and we can be as loud as we need to be.”

I nod, biting my lip. “We could always kick them out early.”

“Patience, y/n. Want me to take care of you?”

I nod desperately. “Please.”

“Then you gotta be good for me. Because the guys are staring at us right now and neither of us will hear the end of it if I take you right now.”

I whine. “Okay… but I want everyone out in an hour.”

He kisses my lips one more time before pulling away from me. “I’ll see what I can do.”

“I love you,” I say just loud enough for him to hear. 

“I love you, sweetheart.” He throws me a wink before disappearing in the sea of people that fill our home.

***

I hope you enjoyed (again)! Please like, reblog, and leave feedback!!

[thehopefuldandelion]

Birds, Dreams, and other Happy Things

A/N: Hey everyone! This is my first fic EVER( I’ve read a ton but have never written one). I have been really loving the song Dream a Little Dream of Me specifically by Doris Day and I wanted to create a little fic about it. All grammar mistakes and errors are mine. :)

One shot, everlark...

And I do not own the hunger games...

FanFiction.net : 

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13456901/1/

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“You ready Katniss?” my roommate and singing partner, Johanna, asks me.

 “I guess,” I reply, “what if they hate the song?” 

“They won’t, otherwise I’ll beat them to bits.” That’s Johanna for you. Always telling me the God honest truth. Ever since I started working at this crusty, dilapidated bar a couple years ago, my life has changed. For the better, I guess. Life as an Everdeen has never been easy. Low paying jobs and Ramen have become the highlights of my shitty existence ever since my father died, leaving my mother to check out. My sister, Primrose, has had the happy childhood I never knew because of my efforts. At 16, I became a parent to her after my mother abandoned us, taking my dad’s life insurance money with her. Hell, I don’t know where she is but I hope I never see her greedy face again. Regardless, bills still have to be payed including Prim’s pricey college tuition. My rent is already 2 days late and I can’t afford- 

“Katniss,” someone calls in a gruff voice waking me out of my trance. I recognize it immediately as the bar owner, Haymitch Abernathy’s, voice. "You're on in 2.”

 I reply with a simple, 

“Thanks Haymitch.”

 Here goes nothing. 

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“Peet, pleaseeeeeeee. I really need a wingman tonight. You are the best man for the job,” I can almost hear the pout in my best friend Finnick’s voice over the phone as he says this. 

“Finnick, you know I can’t. I have an important meeting tomorrow I need to be well rested for. This is my final opportunity to expand the bakery throughout the country,” I tell him in reply.

 I've known Finnick since we were in diapers, running around, eating baby food. He’s always been a great friend, especially in college, but can be a real douche when it comes to any and all responsibilities. 

“I’ll have you home by 1 at the latest. C’mon Peeta. You need the distraction after Delly-” 

“DONT TALK ABOUT HER,” I cut him off and then take a deep breath, “Ok, I'm sorry I yelled but you know it's still a sensitive topic for me.” 

He’s not wrong about me needing a distraction. I had just walked into our apartment, excited to tell Delly the news about the bakery, when I see her butt naked on another man. His name was Thom or something like that. What an asshole.  

“Fine,” I grumble, "I'll come BUT only if I get to leave when I want.” 

“YESSSSSSSSSS!” Finnick squeals like a schoolgirl causing me to roll my eyes. And that’s that. 

——————————————————————————

I place a kiss on my father’s picture with my index and middle fingers, a ritual I do before every performance no matter where it is. James Everdeen was a man with both spunk and spirit and sang with the most beautiful voice. If you listened closely enough, you could hear the silence of the birds as if to hear his melodious singing. It wasn't the same since after he died and I am still grieving his death. My mind strays to the thought of Prim hearing me sing tonight. Her college is out of state preventing us to see each other more than 4 times a year. I cherish every second of her company when she visits. 

As I step onto the worn stage and in front of the 1950’s style microphone, I remember how exhilarated I become whenever that spotlight focuses on me. On my left are the backup singers, Johanna and Annie, while on my right I can hear Thresh drop a beat as Gale plays the keyboard. My body and voice are one as the words seem to flow out of my mouth in tandem with the moving of my body. “This is for you dad,” I think to myself. 

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The bar Finnick drags me to is called Abernathy’s, a small but welcoming place, near his apartment. Once inside, we both grab drinks and head over to a rectangular table. I notice Finnick winking at a stereotypical busty blond with fake eyelashes and large boobs. I roll my eyes exaggeratingly while I turn my attention to the stage (more of an elevated platform only 2 or 3 feet off the ground) as someone announces the next singer. I don’t catch her name because of Finnick’s obnoxious flirting.  

The girl, no, woman who walks out takes my breath away. From her toned, olive legs to her enticing grey eyes and dark hair, she is the most beautiful human being I've ever laid eyes on. The moment she opens her mouth I am captivated by her melodic voice. It is both sultry and sweet with a touch of harmony. I’m hooked like a fish on a line. It’s official, I’m a goner and I don’t even know her name.

 -----------------------------------------------------------

Stars shining bright above you   

Night breezes seem to whisper I love you

Birds singing in the sycamore trees

Dream a little dream of me 

As my eyes wander over the surprisingly filled bar, I notice a pair of crystal blue orbs that seem to stand out from the rest of the crowd. His orbs are locked onto mine in a comfortable gaze. Who is this man? Why is he here? And why, oh why, do I want to sing this song for him?

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Say night-ie night and kiss me 

Just hold me tight and tell me you'll miss me

 When I'm alone as blue as can be 

Dream a little dream of me 

The attraction between the singer and I is heated and I can't seem to tear my eyes away from hers. It seems as if time has stopped and it’s just the two of us. She seems to be singing the song directly at me until she continues searching the large crowd. Who is this woman who has captured my heart in a matter of minutes? 

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Stars fading but I linger on dear  

Just craving your kiss 

I’m longing to linger till dawn dear 

Just saying this 

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you  

Sweet dreams to leave all worries behind you

But in your dreams whatever they be 

Dream a little dream of me 

I tear my eyes away from his muscular body and slightly curled blond hair and focus on finding my sister in the crowd. Her small, slender frame and long blonde hair aren't hard to miss so I spot her right as the musical interlude ends. She gives me a smile filled with an emotion that reminds me of the day she convinced me to sing again. It was a deathly cold winter morning only a couple days after my father’s accident. I shut out the world and anything that made me feel happy including singing. I felt guilty, like I shouldn't sing because my dad is dead and I'm dishonoring him. Prim, darling, Prim dragged me out of bed, made me eat a hearty breakfast, and said she had signed me up for the Christmas caroling competition in town. No matter how much I bitched she would not have it. I did sing and I realized that my dad is still with me, both in my heart and voice. Humming and singing around the apartment has become a habit of mine ever since. Hey, singing pays the bills so how can I complain?

------------------------------------------------------------

Stars fading but I linger on dear 

Just craving your kiss 

I’m longing to linger till dawn dear 

Just saying this 

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you  

Sweet dreams to leave all worries behind you 

But in your dreams whatever they be 

Dream a little dream of me 

Dream a little dream of me 

Dream a little dream.... of me 

When the song concludes, the singer turns her back to the audience and says goodnight seductively over her shoulder causing me to drool. I must have really zoned out with thoughts of her because Finnick shakes my shoulder several times before I respond. 

“You ok, dude?” he asks concerned, “What were you thinking about?”

 I nod my head, anxious to go talk to the dark-haired goddess who just walked out of her dressing room. I jump out of my seat, startling people around me and walk (ok, run) towards my future.

------------------------------------------------------------

As soon as I sing the last note, a wave of contentment envelops me like a blanket. This is where I belong, on a stage, honoring my father through song. 

Annie drags me off stage and leaves to get drinks for all of us. Thresh, the gentle giant he is, just pats my back and smiles. He has never been much of a talker but I appreciate his calming demeanor when I have a shitty day. I feel an arm wrap around my shoulder and see a familiar face, Gale. My best friend since we could hunt. Gale has been Prim and my life support for since my father died and would lug me out of bed on days my depression got the best of me. I can’t imagine life without his ugly face.

“Great job out there Catnip. You always do great,” he tells me. 

I scrunch my nose in response to the nickname he gave me when I was 11. 

“Not too bad yourself. Is Madge here or...?” 

“No, she’s complaining that everyone would laugh at her swollen feet.” He then looks at me with a humorous glint in his eye and says, “Pregnant women. Am I right?”

 Madge and Gale have been dating since high school and are now married with a baby on the way. I often find myself daydreaming about having what they have but I snap out of it. The chances of me having someone who cares for me and would want a family with me are slim. Some would say I’m picky but its more that I’m cautious. I saw what happened to my mother after my dad died. Love destroyed her in the end and I don't know if I could live like that.

 “I wouldn’t know,” I huff, “I will be in my dressing room”.

——————————————————————————

I bump into Johanna on my way back to the dressing room. She notices the scowl on my face.

 “What’s got your panties in a twist?” she asks mockingly. 

“It’s none of your concern, Johanna.” How am I supposed to explain to someone that what I want most of all, I can and will never have.

 A couple minutes later, after I’ve changed into more comfortable clothing, I hear a knock on the door. 

Johanna, in a screeching voice, says, “Brainless, you better get out here. Haymitch wants you to mingle with people.”

I gag. I don’t “mingle”. I avoid people at all cost. My sister is out there waiting for me, though, so I grudgingly walk into the main bar area.

------------------------------------------------------------

There she is. The closer I get, the faster my heart starts beating. She’s even more beautiful up close than I could see from afar. The singer is wearing skinny jeans (which make her ass look divine), a flowy green blouse with a hint of cleavage, and not a trace of makeup can be found. Her hair is in an intricate but effortlessly messy braid. My fingers itched to unbraid it and run my hands through her luscious long locks.  

The woman is hugging a shorter blond headed girl who I assume is a friend or, possibly, sister. This intense urge to grab her by the waist and kiss her senseless bubbles up within me. I push it back down knowing I need to be of sound mind when I confront her. 

As I get closer, the blond girl says something about a cat to which the singer responds with a scowl. I’m about to tap her on the shoulder when a drunken man, about a head taller than me, with bleached hair steps in front of me and asks if the singer wants a drink. She tries to refuse but he doesn’t take no for an answer. On an impulse, I go up to her which shocks the man. 

“Hey honey,” I say while putting an arm around her waist and kissing the side of her head, “I’m sorry, I had to go to the bathroom.” 

My mind gets lost in her forest scented shampoo. She smells like evergreen trees during Christmas and her sweet perfume mixes nicely with the smell.  

The beautiful singer looks at me with wide eyes and a shocking expression on her face.Just when I thought this was a stupid idea, she continues the act by saying, “It’s ok, dear.” She then takes it a step further by laying her head on my chest as well as most of her body weight. 

The douchebag looks pissed, mumbles “whatever”, and walks away.

“Thanks for that...” She says and inquires for my name. 

------------------------------------------------------------

“Peeta,” he responds with a crooked smile, “Peeta Mellark.” 

My first reaction to Peeta saving the day was to yell at him but as I smelled his scent, cinnamon and spices, I decided to play along.

 He sticks out his hand for me to shake. 

“Katniss, Katniss Everdeen,” I tell him. When I shake his hand, I feel goosebumps rise on my skin and an electrical shock go through my arm. I pull my hand away and look at his face. It’s obvious Peeta felt it too.

“Hey, could I maybe buy you a drink?” Peeta questions me nervously. 

“That would be nice,” I say in reply excited to see where this night may go.

Peeta and I end up talking the whole night through. He tells me that he grew up in his parent's bakery and wants to open a new one in New York. His 2 older brothers, Rye and Bran, were troublemakers until they settled down. As the night continues, we seem to drift from surface level topics and dive into the darkest parts of our pasts. When I learn about his abusive childhood from his mother, I start bawling caused by the 1 too many beers I’ve had. I recount stories from Prim and I’s childhoods and my job here at Abernathy’s. When my parents were brought up, I was reluctant to tell this handsome man about my dad but as soon a s I do, I'm comforted in a way I have never felt before. Haymitch eventually yells at us to get out of the bar and I leave with a content smile on my face. 

While I’m walking to the taxi, too intoxicated to drive, Peeta calls my name. 

“Katniss, can I have your number? So, we can... you know... talk... and... stuff?” 

As I turn around, his floppy blond curls are bouncing while he runs towards me. I giggle at his hesitant tone. We exchange numbers and I give him a kiss on the cheek which puts a pink blush on his face. 

------------------------------------------------------------

Katniss and I went on our first date about 2 months later. A simple romantic picnic in the park while watching the sunset.

“Beautiful,” I said but not at the sunset. 

Without warning, she straddles my lap and gives me the shortest kiss making my body ache for more. From then on, we were inseparable. I love her and I want the whole world to know but I am not sure how to tell her. 

------------------------------------------------------------

I have fallen hopelessly and incandescently in love with Peeta Mellark. He’s been there through every painful period, strenuous performance, and temper tantrum. Without him, I’m lost; But how do you tell someone you love them when you have never been in love before?

 -----------------------------------------------------------

I hear the apartment door open and shut. Small, olive arms wrap around my waist. Katniss deeply sighs against my back.  

“Long day?” I ask. 

“Yeah. I missed you,” she tells me in return. 

I turn in her arms so I can face her and kiss the top of her head. Those beautiful silver orbs lock onto mine. A stray hair falls out of her braid, which I push behind her ear in a loving gesture. She rises on her tiptoes and brushes her lips against mine. Katniss sighs into my mouth as we tangle our tongues together.

 I can feel her tug on the hem of my gray Henley shirt which causes me to say sarcastically, "I didn’t cook us dinner just so it could burn.” 

Katniss gives off a hearty laugh and I fall in love with her even more. It seems just yesterday I was listening to her sing and admiring her beauty and now I get to call her my girlfriend. We both serve our plates and talk as we enjoy a relaxing evening at home. 

------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning, I wake up and see a handsome, naked Peeta beside me. The sunlight flooding in from the open window hits his golden curls in a way that makes it look like he is wearing a halo. His muscular arms are wrapped around my slender waist and I lean my head back against his chest. This is what I have always dreamed of but never had.  

I give Peeta a languid kiss and his eyelids slowly open revealing those crystal blue eyes I’ve come to love. 

“If that’s my wakeup call every morning, I’m never leaving this bed,” he says in a low voice. 

“Peeta, I love you.” 

I said it. That confession is finally out in the open. I close my eyes, scared of his response. 

He puts a finger under my chin, causing my eyes to open. 

“Katniss, my love, I love you as well,” he says with a crooked smile.

 In that moment, I realize that Peeta is home. And as long as I'm with him, I will never feel lost.

 We spend the rest of the day in bed, repeating our confessions of love, and kissing to our heart’s content.

 -----------------------------------------------------------

A/N: Ahhhhhh that’s it! I hope you liked it. Anyway uhhhhhhh ill check in with you all later. Bye ;)

[weissfai-blog1]

Love Bites.

AePete AU

"There are no accidental meetings between souls."

Pete is a vampire. AND NO – he is not some sparkling diamond vampire – though whoever look at Pete will say he is a sparkling Prince – but no – Pete is not a twilight vampire nor is he Bram Stroker’s Dracula vampire. 

He is a half Noble vampire. His mother is a powerful dragon seeker while his father is a full blooded Noble. 

The Nobles are an ancient and powerful race that possess great strength, speed and telepathy as well as various blood related abilities, such as the talent to grant similar powers to others via contracts "of blood and soul". They reside on an island nation, known as Lukedonia, that cannot be detected by human senses. They have guarded humans against predators and the forces of nature as long as they have existed, due to a genetic inability to ignore the slaughter of the weak, helpless humans. Thousands of years ago, they were worshipped as gods by various cultures around the world.

However, the Nobles are nearing extinction due to a scarcity of females to mate with. With their lifemates, male Nobles live emotion-filled colorful lives. Without them, the males fight the madness that causes them to choose between suicide or the thrill of killing humans by draining their blood, becoming soulless vampires in the process.

But he doesn’t apply to these category as he is not a full blood Noble. 

Pete is a gentle and way too sweet and shy half Noble that his father deem him unworthy of the gift and vanished him, and because his mother loves Pete so much – they both abandon the life in Lukedonia and travel and after a hundred years of traveling to different countries, they settle to Thailand. 

Pete’s mother was born in Thailand. She loves the country, the people, the beauty and the serenity of the land.

Pete and his mother change their surname to fit in with the Thai people and they settle on an old mansion. His mother told him to live like a normal boy and because Pete doesn’t crave blood like ordinary Noble, he is free to go out even on sunlight. As he is also a part Dragon Seeker, he doesn’t turn into ash or die if the sun hits his skin. He is what the others may call Day Walker.

Pete’s mother looks at her son. She worries about Pete as the first to being a half Noble and half Dragon Seeker boy to ever live. Most of the half-breeds die at their 50th years of age. But Pete is nearing his 300 years of age and though he is the same as the Nobles who lost their colour of sight, Pete never changes. He doesn’t crave blood (though she gave him blood via blood bag through blood bank), doesn’t go dark, every night she administer a soul and spirit check on his body but its clean… more like pure. Her son has a purest white soul. 

Putch heard about the legendary Noblesse but never given it a thought. For all her life, she knew only of one Noblesse and that person is not half but a full blood Noble.

Putch told Pete to live his life freely. Whoever he chooses, whether it be human or of the same kind, she will support him. 

Pete met Ae. 

Pete was walking out of his campus when again the pain in his head hits him, the pain and disoriented blurry visions keeps on popping out in his head. He wasn’t aware what’s happening in his surrounding when he heard a shout and someone drag his body and both of him and the other stumble in the ground with a loud impact.

‘Are you driving to hell?! And you! What the hell are you doing not looking where you’re walking?! Are you planning to die?! If you are, choose a place where I’m not there!’

Pete doesn’t understand what’s happening but his heart then begun to hammer and his visions doubled… the ground… its grey… he looks at his surrounding and he was blinded by the burst of colours.

COLOURS!

He can see colours… 

But the only time a Noble can see colour is when they find their lifemate through voice or connection.

‘Oi! Are you okay?!’

Pete stumbled once again on the ground and clutch his heart tight. 

Its beating crazily and there’s a line. 

A magic being woven.

A connection being form.

Pete found himself being raise by the person and for the first time he looks at him.

Pete gasped.

Black obsidian eyes looks at him.

‘Are you okay? You’re bleeding!’

He what?! Impossible!

He looks and yeah, he is bleeding. But why?

That’s their first meeting.

The man who gave him colour and light ~ Ae. A small boy but with sturdy muscular body and a harsh foul mouth.

Ae cannot help but feel lucky and at the same time with the thinking: “Did I ever save the whole country on my past life to have a friend like Pete?” 

Each and everyone who knew Ae will know that he is a brute. He doesn’t have any sweet bone in his body, he doesn’t even have a STOP DON’T SAY IT brake on his mouth. He will say what he want to say especially to some idiots who lacks braincells. 

Pond calls Ae: “Son of a Beast! He will kick his only best friend and whacks my head if I so much get on his business and be nosy! See this! See this?! That’s his fist! My skull already has a dent in the form of his fist!”

Ping: “The greatest man but has the foulest mouth on the planet. He doesn’t care nor doesn’t give a damn what other people will think. I have never been the receiving end of his fist and kick so I’m happy to say that he is still a friend I can count on.”

Bow: “Tactless beast! He just made someone cry when he flat our rejected her. But that’s what I like about Ae, he never take advantage of people and will always be there to help others.”

Can: “Ae is the bestest of the best man out there! He doesn’t give a damn and will help me even though he doesn’t know me! He is a great bastard buddy!”

Captain of the Football Team: “Ae is our MVP. He may be 174 cm shorty but he can kick those asses good bye! We love Ae in this team. He brings glory to us! Well except when he beat us Sports Science when he is an Engineering Major…”

LadyBoys: “I don’t know how the hell a muscular, sexy abs, yummy muscles belong to that shorty with foul mouth! This is an outrage! He even give me the middle finger when I told him if he wants to spend the night with me! Such barbaric action against me a lady!”

Pete chuckles to the different description of Ae. 

For him, Ae is the opposite of what they say and he cant help wander why. Ae is sweet to him. Ae never finds him annoying and he is always pinching his cheeks or ruffling his hair. Ae told him that he likes his hair, soft and silky (well he is a half-Noble so his hair is entirely different from humans) 

Ae never rush him when they are eating. Its hard for him to swallow cause he is not used to eating the food Ae gave him, he eats either fruits and drinks blood via blood bags from blood bank. So its really really hard for him to swallow any meat and vegetables.

Ae cares about his safety that Ae will bike all the way to his apartment and drop him off (when all he did was walked, he is a Noble so walking for an hour or so is nothing to him, or he can just jump building to building or well, fly – he is not human after all)

The Engineering Department won the game with Ae’s two points versus Sports Science and instead of joining the seniors and juniors at the party, Ae went to Pete. Pete was alarmed when Ae was at his apartment. Pete looks at the full moon and this is the time that he is very weak and the blood bags are not stored in his freezer where he usually storms them.

He has been feeling weak for the couple of days and the blurry visions and headache keeps on attacking him.

Ae was worried because Pete promise to watch the game only he didn’t show up. Pete never miss a game and he was not answering his line messages as well.

‘Pete, what’s wrong? You’re so pale.’ Ae was scared for Pete. Pete’s skin is milky white with a blush but the Pete before him is pale as ghost.

‘Ae… please go. I’m okay. Please please go.’

‘No! I will be here! Tell me what to do!’

‘Ae please! Go!’

Ae was angry now when Pete seems to be pushing him. 

Pete was crying and Ae doesn’t know what to do. Ae tried to hug him but Pete pushed him -  a little bit strong that made Ae stumbled and hurt.

‘OH! AE! Im sorry! But please please. I don’t want to hurt you! Please go!’

Pete was scared – he can feel hunger. 

He had never felt his way before.

He can smell it… the delicious smell of blood. He clench his teeth and told Ae once again to go.

‘No! I will not go!’

‘Ae please… I don’t want you to hate me… please’

Ae is crying now as well, ‘Please tell me Pete what’s wrong with you?’

‘Ae… I… I- please just go.’

‘No!’

‘Ae!’

Then everything on Pete’s memory become a blur and then darkness.

He doesn’t remember anything.

What he remembers is the sweet taste of blood in his lips.

He woke up and was shock. 

He was scared.

‘Ae?’

Everything – his surrounding is full of blood. Dried blood.

‘NO! NO! AE!’

‘What?’

‘Huh?’ Pete looks up and saw Ae running to him. Ae in his shorts and wet hair. 

‘Pete are you okay?’

‘Ae?’

‘Yes.’

‘Ae!’

‘Yes! That’s me! I mean yes what?’

‘You-you’re okay… what-what? Blood?’

‘Ah. Well… First of all, Pete this is not my blood. This is the blood from the bag inside your freezer. And well, some of them are your blood.’

‘What happen Ae?’

‘You kinda turn dart vader last night. You push me – well more like – haul me – good thing it was a soft sofa and went to the freezer, you open the blood bag and drink it, but you throw it away saying ‘It taste like rot’ and then you look at me-‘

‘Ae! Oh my! Did I hurt-‘

‘I’m not hurt. I understand what’s happening even though I don’t believe it – but you well, your eyes turned blue and your fangs kinda shows and told me your are so thirsty. I offer you my blood-‘

‘NO!’

‘Well yes, but when you are nearing me, you bite your own arm. And told me to get out.’

‘Then why are you still here?’

‘I can never leave you Pete. You look like your dying. And you were speaking about soul contract or blood contract-‘

‘GOD NO!’

‘Well – I don’t want you to suffer… and I understand that you need blood. I gave it to you freely.’

Pete then put his trembling hands to Ae’s neck, removing the towel, and yes, there it is his bite.

‘Ae! Oh God! I’m so sorry!’

‘Pete don’t be. I agree with it.’

‘No! no! You don’t know what it means-‘

‘It means that you’re going to drink my blood from now on. That my blood is the only blood you’ll ever drink.’

‘Ae why? Why didn’t you leave. I’m  a monster Ae. You should have left me…’

‘Pete. We have been fighting last night more than hours – me telling you to drink my blood while you insisting I get out. You even threatened to kiss me and enchant me with your other spell from your mother side and I still stayed.’

‘Why? Why Ae?’

Ae smiled and put his two hands on Pete’s cheek, ‘Because you are not a monster. You are a pure cute vampire. My vampire.’

THIS IS NOT THE END. There will be a proper chapter by chapter story fic. Thank you.

Author’s Note : I was looking for another name for Vampire when I remember about the webtoon that I’ve read years ago (its still on going) it’s a Korean manhwa title: NOBLESSE. I borrowed the title or the race and some places. I just don’t want to say just a vampire.

[darktwistydamaged]

✨ Small minds can't comprehend big spirits. To be great, you have to be willing to be mocked, hated, and misunderstood.

✨ "Maybe I'm a pig. Maybe I'm an ass. Maybe I'm a vermin like everybody says but I tell the truth, it's the only thing I've got going for me."

✨ "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - #WinstonChurchill

✨ Don't tell me i'm the prettiest u've seen.Tell me I'm a warrior, tell me I'm stronger than any blows I've taken & that I wear the scars well

✨ A badass crazy, tells the truth. Soft but strong. Knows her worth. Unapologetic & honest. The type of woman u go to war beside not against.

✨ There's fire in her. If loved correctly, she will warm your entire home. If abused she will burn it down.

✨ When someone dies of cancer, we blame the disease. Suicide is a disease, dont blame the victim for losing the fight.

✨ She's a masterpiece of chaotic beauty.

✨ She's like a tornado with pretty eyes & a heartbeat. A stubborn heart, messy mind, reckless soul.

✨ We are masters of unsaid words but slaves of those we let slip out.

✨ She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles.

✨ She's fire and ice, you'll fear the cold and crave the burn.

✨ She wears strength and darkness equally well. The girl has always been half goddess, half hell.

✨ She is art. What the fuck do you expect from her other than, confusion, beauty and god damn soul?

✨ Fierce soul. Brave heart. Strong mind.

✨ Sometimes hell is the person who promised you something heavenly. The devil is good at pretending to be everything you want.

✨ Like death, she was breath taking.

✨ Stop being afraid of being crazy, instead guard yourself from being "too" sane. This is the artists way.

✨ Beauty may be dangerous, but intelligence is lethal!

✨ She is both hell fire and holy water and the flavour you taste is based on how you treat her.

✨ Chaos & beauty intertwined. Whiskey in a tea cup. Angel eyes. Acid mouth. Messy mind. Reckless soul

✨ A hopeless romantic with a twisted mind and high standards.

✨ Make a plan. Set a goal. Work toward it. But every now and then, drink it in. 'Cause this is it. It might all be gone tomorrow #GreysAnatomy

✨ I will not settle for anything less than a soul deep, electrifying connection.

✨ The lips of a sinner, a devilish kiss.

✨ She has that "set the whole fucking world on fire" look in her eyes, kind of bad ass vibe to her.

✨ An acquired taste, not for the faint hearted.

✨ Nothing is ever designed to offend. You choose to get offended.

✨ Every heart is like a phoenix. It may catch aflame and burn to ashes, but it will be reborn, stronger than before.

✨ The world isn't split into good and evil. We've all got light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. #SiriusBlack

✨ Three things that can not remain hidden, the sun, the moon, and the truth. #Buddha

✨ I love you more, the more I love you.

✨ You're down, but you're not out and whatever is going on in your life, you keep fighting. #JenniferLopezTrueLove

✨ In the same way negative experiences can bring you down, having positive people around can help lift you up. #TrueLove

✨ Every ending is also a beginning. We just don't know it at the time. @shemarmoore #CriminalMinds

✨ She's a terribly real thing, in a terribly false world & this is why she is pained so often.

✨ I don't want normal and easy and simple. I want painful, difficult, devastating, life changing, extraordinary love.

✨ She never looked nice, she looked like art & art wasn't supposed to look nice, it was supposed to make you feel something.

✨ The tragedy is not to die, but to be wasted. #HannibalLecter

✨ She got her daddy's tongue & temper. Sometimes her mouth could use a filter. God shook his head the day he built her oh, but I bet he smiled

✨ U bring out the best in me. I don’t mean better manners, or a sense of maturity or whatever else this world expects of me. I mean, u make me want to climb rooftops, run wild, act inappropriately, take risks & pursue my dreams with passion & integrity - U make me feel like living

✨ I am fire. If you want something salty & sweet with no opinion, I’m not the woman for you. I spit flames often!!

✨ You have set on me, but you are not the sun.

✨ Don't let what he wants eclipse what you need. He's very dreamy, but he's not the sun. You are.

✨ Good, better, best. Never let it rest. Until your good is better and your better is best. - Tim Duncan

✨ I want somebody with smart intellect and a heart from hell, kisses so deep like a bottomless well.

✨ Lust is when the mind desires what the heart admires. Love is when the mind admires what the heart desires.

✨ “The world has already been too tough on her, the least she needs is tough love. Be tough when you need to be, but always be soft with her. She has thorns, but she is a flower.”

✨ She slept with wolves without fear, for the wolves knew, a lion was among them.

✨ She that dare not grasp the thorn, should never crave the rose.

✨ Hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things I couldn't do for you. Hate me in ways, ways hard to swallow, hate me so you can finally see whats good for you.

✨ You’re so screwed up that you make me, make sense.

✨ "If you love someone, you tell them. Even if you’re scared that it’s not the right thing. Even if you’re scared that it’ll cause problems." #GreysAnatomy

✨ "Too often, the thing you want the most is the one thing you can't have. Desire leaves us heartbroken." #GreysAnatomy

✨ A queen will always turn pain into power.

✨ "The only voice that matters is the 1 in your head. The one telling you what you probably already knew. The one that’s almost always right.”

✨ Do not hide your face. The moon is covered in craters yet still commands our attention, even in the midst of all those glittering stars. What I mean to say is, you are magnificent, for all your imperfections, simply as you are. - Beau Taplin

✨ Damaged people are dangerous because they know they can survive.

✨ The only way you can be mistreated, is by allowing yourself to be mistreated. #TrueLove Jlo

✨ Deception and perfection are wonderful traits, one will breed love and the other hate.

✨ I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow & the soul.

✨ "Each person we let ourselves care about is just one more loss somewhere down the line.." - Meredith Grey

✨ Why do we always want the ones who don't see us, instead of the ones who do?! #YoureNotYou

✨ Every time I break, I come back stronger than before 💎🔹

✨ Loving someone is just delayed pain, eventually you’re going to lose them, one way or the other. #InsidiousChapter3

✨ “She’s tough. She tries to hide it. She’s difficult. But if you make an effort, she’s worth it. She’s worth the effort.” - #McDreamy #GreysAnatomy

✨ I am not the girl the guy gets at the end of a movie. I am not a fantasy. If you want me, earn me!! #OliviaPope #Scandal

✨ It’s gonna hurt me to hate you, but loving you is worse. #CardiB 

✨ Don’t focus on what if, focus on what is. - #IrreplaceableYou

✨ “When your heart breaks, you’ve got to fight like hell to make sure you're still alive. Because you are. That pain you feel? That's life. The confusion and fear? That's there to remind you, that somewhere out there is something better, and that something is worth fighting for.”

✨ I survive because the fire inside me burns brighter than the fire around me.

✨ She feels powerfully.

✨Deeper than you’ll ever understand with a heart of endless vision for the unconditional for every aspect of the flawed soul. She’s complicated. She feels everything and nothing; the good and the bad all at once. All the time!!

✨ "And when at last you find someone to whom you feel you can pour out your soul, you stop in shock at the words you utter - they are so rusty, so ugly, so meaningless and feeble from being kept in the small cramped dark inside you so long." — Sylvia Plath

✨ If you can still find the beauty within the darkest days, sometimes, that alone is an accomplishment. When you feel like you’re drowning, like you can’t even deal anymore, stop for a moment, recollect, take a breath. Then you begin again.

✨ You like because and you love despite.

(You like someone because of all of their qualities & you love someone despite some of their qualities)

✨ A strong woman is one who feels deeply and loves fiercely. Her tears flow as abundantly as her laughter. A strong woman is both soft and powerful, she is both practical and spiritual. A strong woman in her essence is a gift to the world.

✨ All things that live, die. This is why you must find joy in the living, while the time is yours, and not fear the end. To deny this is to deny life. To fear this... is to fear life. But to embrace this... Can you embrace this?

You are stronger than you think. - #IKillGiants

✨ Being normal isn’t necessarily a virtue, it denotes a lack of courage.

✨ Like the moon, she had a side of her so dark that even stars couldn’t shine on it. She had a side of her so cold that even the sun couldn’t burn on it.

✨ Broken girls blossom into warriors

✨ A rose can never be a sunflower. A sunflower can never be a rose. All flowers are beautiful in their own way, and that’s like women too. - Miranda Kerr

✨ Inside everyone there exists a dark side. Most people rise above it but some are consumed by it until there is nothing left but pure evil

✨ Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light. - #HarryPotter #PrisonerOfAzkaban

✨ Don't you ever let a soul in the world tell you that you can't be exactly who you are - #LadyGaga

✨ You either get bitter or you get better. It's that simple. You either take what has been dealt to you and allow it to make you a better person or you allow you to tear you down. The choice does not belong to fate, it belongs to you.

✨ She’s a strong cup of black coffee in a world that’s drunk on cheap wine and shallow love.

✨ “Every day you wake up and have a second chance, to do whatever you want, to be whoever you want. The only thing stopping you, is you” - #SecondAct @JLo

✨ It starts with the eyes, she's got to have those kind of eyes that can see through the bullshit to the good in someone, 20% angel, 80% devil - #DominicToretto #FastAndFurious

✨ Ignoring your instincts is like blinding your soul. #TrustYourGut

✨ Let me be clear, my love is unconditional but your presence in my life is not. The moment that you prove that your value of me does not measure up to my sense of self worth — i’ll have no problem unconditionally loving the memory of you.

✨ Intimacy is beyond kisses, cuddles & sex. It’s is crying at night about your past to someone who listens & comforts you. It’s getting a headache, taking a nap & waking up to your partner rubbing your back. Intimacy isn’t all to do with sex, it’s the small things that count

✨ The people you can joke around and have fun with that don’t fit in a box, take no shit, kick ass when needed... the fiercely badass, kindhearted, deep down sweethearts and that are kind of assholes but not full assholes. Yeah, those are my kind of people.

✨ Everything is temporary; Emotions, thoughts, people & scenery. Do not become attached, just flow with it.

✨ It's okay to put your heart on your sleeve. Okay to have that softer side - the softer side in the sense of being able to listen, to deal with fear, to not always be so dominant. 😋 @shemarmoore

✨ Just a reminder: You’re whole without someone else. You are not a fraction. You’re a complete masterpiece all by yourself; you do not need anyone else to validate your existence.

✨ To the women of the world. You’re sexual. You’re soulful. You’re emotional. You’re spiritual. You’re magic. You’re both of the light and the dark. You’re human. Don’t deny any aspect of who you are. A healthy soul is a whole soul.

✨ Be the villain you were born to be. Stop waiting for someone to come along and corrupt you. Succumb to the darkness yourself.

✨ Being dark and twisty is not a flaw, it's a strength.

✨ We're all in the same game, just different levels, dealing with the same hell, just different devils.

✨ She is the kind of dark you only see in a cemetery in October on a haunted Halloween night .

✨ #Chemistry - an attraction that can’t be quantified or explained

✨ All you can count on is now, this moment, because in a blink, everything can change - #Dexter 

✨ The smallest thing can change your life. In the blink of an eye something happens by chance, when you least expect it. - #TheLuckyOne

✨ Sometimes, finding the light means you must pass through the deepest darkness - #TheLuckyOne

✨ Sometimes things hit u all at once. You’re up one day, then down the next. Life is one big wave. All we can do is flow, adapt & transform.

✨ There are three types of people, those at the top, those at the bottom & those who fall. - #ThePlatform

✨ There are things that will happen that will make you feel powerless, that will make you feel insignificant but that’s it, they’re just feelings and sometimes you have to stop feeling & start doing. #Underwater

✨ Yeah I’m somebody’s DUFF, guess what? So are you, so is everybody. There’s always going to be somebody prettier, more talented or richer than you. That should affect how you see yourself. - #TheDuff

✨ Made wiser with heartache. Made stronger by pain.

✨You don’t have to climb a mountain to stand on top of the world.

✨Even the ugliest of places can be beautiful as long as you take the time to look.

✨It’s okay to get lost, as long as you find your way back.

✨ There is beauty in the most unexpected of places

✨There are bright places even in dark times, and if there isn’t, you can be that bright place, with infinite capacities

✨ Physical attraction is beautiful, but it’s the mental attraction that leaves you wanting, needing, craving.

✨ Jealousy - A sign of insecurity, a sign of weakness, a sign of obsession

✨ Like roses we blossom and die.

✨ I have absolutely no need to be liked or understood.

✨ I'd rather be scary than cute. Cute isn't always memorable, but nobody forgets scary

✨ Greatness, lies not in being strong but in the right using of strength. He or she is the greatest whose strength carries up the most hearts, by the attraction of his own. - #Wonder

✨ This darkness of mine cries out for light and all you did was lurk in the shadows. - 🖤

✨ Your demons, your darknesses are part of your masterpiece, your beautiful dark art

✨ What hurts you, blesses you. Darkness is your candle.

✨ “We owe it to the people that we lost, to live the lives that they can’t “ - Meredith Grey 💔

✨ You only get mad because you care. Anger is often an expression only shown towards people and things you care about the most.

✨ To live, is to suffer and to survive, you’ve got to find meaning in the suffering.

✨ She is the wolf they could not ensnare, the voice they could not silence and the fierce wild spirit they could not destroy.

✨ I’m not tearing down my walls for anyone again, you want to know what’s inside? #Climb.

✨ You're a flower. Don't compare yourself to weeds just because they grow faster. 🌷Slow growers have the most resilient roots. 🌱🌻

✨ To find me; you must first unbury me.

✨ Bury me in a dark forest, smelling of the earth, alone with the creatures forevermore.

✨ She’s part lady, she’s part wild, and she’s all fucking storm.

[maahiscreams]

little brown hands

i) help  cried the little brown boy (innocence violated)  help  screamed he little brown boy (rotting inside)  who was born a girl  help, help, help  nobody heard the little brown screaming boy maybe if he stayed a girl  they would make more of a fuss after all boys dont cry, do they?

 ii) his thin brown fingers  fluttered about  little brown boy  tending to flowers  eyes down, chest sucked in  he knew he wasnt  masculine  but he wasnt a woman  despite what was between his legs  despite how he rotted  between those little brown legs  he thought  the flowers were prettier than him

 iii) little brown youth  talking to flowers  he begs make me one of you  i want to be beautifu l i want to feel beautiful  the flowers couldnt talk he was obsessed little brown youth craving beauty in his life

 iv) brown man  still little  just as delicate  yet brittle  man of contradictions  quiet  screaming inside  flowers were his only friend  he felt like a wilted rose  dried up  dead

 v) he strove to exist  without a toll on anyone  like a flower  he looked pretty, was admired  but he never let them know  he was dying  he needed love  little brown man  weak as anyone could be 

 vi) people were more than happy  to pluck his petals  but nobody thought  to care  for the little brown boy  killing himself  to keep others happy.

[deliciouskook-blog]

We don’t talk anymore (Jikook Cover) Scenario  Jungkook x Reader

Hello guys

This is my first Tumblr post and first fanfiction inspired by the beautiful cover released by JUNGKOOOK&JIMINNN 'We don't talk anymore'. I know Jungkook has done the cover alone before but I think this version is more powerful and made me feel things as many of you would probably relate and Jimin's sweet voice is everything I love him so much..... I'm in tears rn :'(

Anyways so when i heard this song i just grabbed my lapotp and typed this, its raw and not proofread and was literally just me blabbering cos of the feels i got from the cover and so i imagined a really sad relationship. I hope you enjoy it!!

I don't know if anyone's going to even read this but my friend told me to post it anyway so if you like it please give me some love!!! I accept requests <3 and would probably write better if i wasnt so emo ahhahahahahahahhaha (i shouldnt lie to myself ill never stop feeling emo while stanning bts)

Word count: 1.9k

Y/N POV

It’s been a long time since you felt the spark that initially ignited your relationship, you always had to put your 100% and felt like it was dying anyway, there was nothing that can be done to save it and that’s when you thought it was time to start seeing someone else and move on.

You called him a day before you decided to forget the hell that you have been through because of him but like all the previous calls that turned to voicemail this time was no different.

It was the familiar female voice again ‘the mobile number you have called is not available...’

You felt ashamed that he has put you through this and hurt your pride, because no matter how much you called he just wont answer.

Y/N: ‘jungkook I need to speak to you’ – delivered at 10:31 pm

‘please just answer the phone..’ – delivered at 10:32 pm

‘jungkook’ – delivered at 10:32 pm

but nothing

5 minutes later… the messages were checked as ‘opened’

So she decided to call again but there was no answer.

Jungkook: ‘I wish you could stop calling me at night you know im at practice’ ‘I wont answer I’m working so good night’ – opened at 10:40 pm

Y/N: ‘why are you like this?’ ‘whats wrong?’ – opened at 10:41 pm

Jungkook: ‘nothing is wrong’ – opened at 10:42 pm

Y/N: ‘don’t lie to me can you please call me back after practice?’ – opened at 10:42 pm

Jungkook: ‘yeah.. later’ – opened at 10:45 pm

You stayed up all night waiting for his call it was an agonisingly slow night but you waited for him to call you like a fool anyway. 3AM came around and still no call. He never practices this late.

So you decided to call one more time. And unexpectedly there was an answer.

‘hello? Jungkook?’

silence

‘yeah… wussup’

he sounded drunk and you were speechless…

‘werent you at practice? Why are you drunk’

‘im not drunk’

‘well okay then what are you’

‘im jungkook’

no shit

‘ok jungkook we need to talk but I cant talk to you if your drunk’

‘youre already talking so carry on… what is this 39 missed calls all about’

‘where are you, can I see you? and if you answered the first call there wouldn’t be 39’

‘no im going home now so just say what you want’

‘okay… I just don’t think this is going to work out between us’

silence

‘jungkook’

then he laughed sarcastically

‘are you breaking up with me?’

‘yeah I jus-‘

‘okay then’

‘jungkook I need to tell you why’

‘I don’t.. think I care…’

= call ended=

Jungkook woke up with a severe headache. The time was already 2 past noon and he had no idea what hes done the night before but all he could remember was drinking so much.

The truth is he didn’t know why he drank so much in fact he didn’t know why he gave up doing anything besides work the past few month, he knew his relationship with you was dying slowly and he knew It was his fault but the Wings tour and his musical career was eating him and was far more important, at least in the company and BTS’ eyes.

He thought that you could wait for him but his career cant, he knew it was selfish and hard but he had no other choice and he didn’t know better, because he was only 19 and he could only handle so much.

You woke up around the same time, you didn’t get time to sleep at all from crying over the ended phone call, you knew it would be hard but you had to move on. You knew you didn’t deserve him and that made your relationship rocky at first, but as jungkook told you he loved you repeatedly, you slowly gained confidence and learnt to love yourself too but that all came crashing down because he clearly doesn’t love you anymore.

You knew the only way you would get over him is erasing him completely from your life which included blocking his phone number, for his own good you knew he was a good guy and probably would try to befriend you after these 3 years but you couldn’t handle seeing him as not yours, but just a friend. You took out your phone and as you unlocked it, you saw the selfie you had at their last date together and couldn’t help but cry even more because all that has to go too.

= 3 months passes by=

Authors PV

As you slowly learnt how to live life from scratch, Y/N served another caramel late to who seemed to be a distressed customer. She had quit her old job which was close to big hit’s main building and decided on a new beginning.

Within these 3 months she had met a guy who’s a regular at the café named Zico, he would throw way too many compliments about the coffee than one would give but she found it cute as at least for what seemed like years, she’s started to receive the attention she craved… but she cant help but think of jungkook whenever she sees him wishing that he would be the one who would give her these compliments and taste coffee that she only recently learnt to master but obviously that life doesn’t exist anymore.

But as she is in south korea, bts are increasingly becoming a hot topic and their songs were played everywhere as if her memories of him weren’t enough reminder.

Slowly Y/N got to know Zico even more, and naturally they dated. She couldn’t deny how good he treats her, maybe its because it’s a new relationship but he was there when she texted and even called her when she didn’t turn up for work because she was sick. He showed that he cares. Jungkook didn’t.

On a fated evening, when the new couple chose to walk next to the Han river a familiar figure stood on the way walking with what seemed another familiar figure but she chose to ignore it and continue walking holding hands with her new lover.

What Y/N dont know is jungkook has been growing crazy the last 3 months, he had tried to reach you so many times, he doesn’t remember the phone call that night and he thought that you ended the relationship alone and hasn’t decided to even talk it with him. He missed you so much and every day he realised how much of it was his fault, it was his fault that you had left your old job, your neighbourhood, changed your number and disappeared. He wished you were happy but deep down he hoped like himself that you weren’t able to forget him.

Then he saw you walking, he looked at jimin who was trying to distract him from the sight that he has also seen. Jungkook felt angry and tried to contain himself, but soon after he was washed with feelings of sadness and regret, deciding to walk up to you anyway.

‘Y/N ?’

you looked at him with surprised eyes, which Zico has returned to you in confusion.

‘can you give me a minute?’ you said to Zico who nodded and walked away

‘you look well’ you said to him

‘is that all you have to say to me’ he said to you with tears in his eyes

‘I don’t remember you wanting me to say anything at all… but say what?’ you replied returning a hurt face.

‘why you left me like this’ he said looking down knowing exactly what you left but he had to hear you say it

‘you didn’t want to hear it.. remember?’ you said to him as you laughed away your tears

‘what are you talking about?’ he asked you

‘you said to me you didn’t want to hear it, remember you were kind of drunk actually but I knew if I didn’t tell you right there and then, you would never pick up’ you admitted

‘you couldve texted me at least’ he said defeated

‘you don’t even reply anyway… I need to go’ you walked away

then he watched you combining your hands with your new lover as you continue walking. Jungkook went back to the company’s building with Jimin who tried to comfort him, he saw the pain that Jungkook went through the past few months, but he couldn’t deny that he was the one who screwed it up for himself.

Jungkook entered the studio where he was meant to record aimlessly, he always overworked himself when he was feeling lonely or sad and today he was broken. He scrolled down his Spotify playlist and encountered a song named ‘We don’t talk anymore – By Charlie Puth’, it was always there but he never really bothered to listen to it, but tonight he tapped ‘PLAY’.

By the end of the song he was sobbing, he remembered how much he wanted to come back to you when he had a day full of schedule, he expected you to be there texting him sweet words when he couldn’t make it to dates because he couldn’t perfect his practice, celebrate happy occasions with you but there must be a good reason that she left him he thought laughing to himself as he related to the lyrics of the song. He was so drawn to the song that he decided to cover it hoping that the fans would like it too, but more importantly as a message to his gone girl.

=3 weeks forward=

‘Did you hear the songs Jungkook released this month’ said a co-worker to the other ‘No no what is it called? Put it on’ the other one replied

They played the cover that the entire of nation of Korea has been obsessing over, and for the first time the you heard it. And you felt as if you were shot in the heart. You could hear the sincerity in his voice and realised how the hell did things come this far, because you couldn’t imagine your life without him no matter what.

‘I need to go somewhere can you cover for me please? you said to one of the coworkers and ran outside the café to big hit, cursing yourself for deleting his phone number.

And as you ran to the building you asked the familiar security who still remembers you if jungkook can be called down.

You felt like life at that moment was like a ticking bomb and you needed to tell him whatever you were feeling at that moment, you’ll probably regret it but at this moment you didn’t care.

But it was too late as you saw him walking down the stairs with another girl’s hand around his. You felt like you were shot a second time, this time earning a much severe injury. You laughed at the thoughts you had, the he sang this for you – it might’ve had no meaning at all. With tears running down your cheeks you ran before he could notice you catching a TAXI, but he did see you and realised that you came back. Jungkook let go of the girl’s hand to run after you but it was too late… he watched the TAXI drive off.

Many tears were shed that day.

[twilightttv-a]

WHAT PLANET ARE YOU? 

Aaron

VENUS You’ve always been in the shadow of someone else and it’s something you know you’ll never be able to escape. You feel like you’ll never manage to live up to the person you’re supposed to be and nothing you do is going to be good enough - it’s just good enough to scrap by. The harder you try, the harder you fall, and you’ve fallen from the pantheon, darling. You’re lost in knowing where to go when you aren’t trying to be better than sometihng, prove that you’re worth it; it’s become an obsession much in the same way bracelets become. Pieces you wear like armor in public to hide how you’re adrift in a world that didn’t wait for you

Andy

MARS You like to think you’re an open book, but the more you talk about yourself to other people, the more you find they barely know anything about you. There’s so many little crevices you haven’t discovered about yourself and so many things you think are obvious that really, really aren’t - there’s a storm on the horizon, always just out of reach, because you’re so out of tune with yourself. You try pleasing others more often than you try to take care of yourself and it shows in the way your nails are always dirty. You always need to have music playing - it’s like you’ve Pavlove’d yourself into doing something, anything, everything when there’s background noise. There’s too much going on for you to process it all and you’d much rather look at memes than look at the news, but you look at the news anyway, because why not? Why is it so bad to watch it all fall apart without being able to do anything about it?

Bryce, Forest

SATURN Do you know why you like being the center of attention? Do you know why there’s always something people are drawn to, why it’s always the same thing and why you always get taken advantage of? Do you know why you always say “I’m fine,” when someone asks if you’re okay? Tell you what, darling, take a look at Saturn’s rings and ask why they’re found more beautiful than Jupiter, when they’re just rocks and ice. Are you just rocks and ice? Or do you want to be more than that? Don’t you want to be somebody with a voice, someone more than just a passing face in the crowd? You don’t know what your dreams are and you don’t know how to deal with criticism, but somehow, sometime, you’ll figure it out. For your sake, I hope you do. I know you do. And don’t suffocate on your way there - you’re in real danger of sinking if you don’t keep going. And you don’t want to sink again, do you? It's hard to pick up the pieces. You're stronger than that.

Ciryke, Nilo, Roxanne

JUPITER You want to be bigger than life. There’s this crushing feeling in your chest of doubt, that it’s not going to matter when no one remembers you because you aren’t memorable, but you crave the feeling of being something, of being someone, anyone memorable enough for people to recognize. You want to be someone that gets stories told about them - used to dream about seeing your name up in lights. You practice too hard and you tire yourself out, and you never know when to stop because you’ve been told all your life that the system is fair and that if you work hard enough, you’ll get a shot. You know now that it isn’t like that, but you’re going to try, and you’re not gonna stop ‘till you drop dead. Otherwise, you dont know what to do with yourself. What else is there to do? You’ve got a dream, and that makes it all worth it, doesn’t it? Does it?

Mal, Rickey, Tyrus

EARTH No amount of blankets is going to change the fact that you’re still falling apart inside, that it feels like everything you’ve ever done wrong is crawling underneath your skin, that you feel like there’s something wrong with you but everyone says that it’s fine, you’re fine, it’s all going to end up okay but you can’t change anything, no, it’s not in your control, they say. They’re wrong. You deserve to get better. Don’t you? Aren’t you tired of the bags under your eyes, of the weight on your shoulders? You have a hard time figuring out which relationships are toxic because they’re so fundamentally ingrained into your personality - or so you think - and you don’t know quite how to take care of yourself. You want to touch the stars but you’re so stuck in your problems rather than your dreams it feels like drowning, not flying, and it’s hard to tell the difference between the two feelings of weightlessness.

TJ

MERCURY You’ve got an intimate relationship with the things that can hurt you - they’re familiar in the same way putting away laundry is. You don’t know when to cut people out of your life and you don’t know when you’re angry. In fact, you’re burning with resentment, anger, but you can’t figure out why and it’s on the backburner so often you forget that you’re even angry. Everyone tends to look past you and the more you think about it, the more you don’t care. You know you can’t be a burning star in everyone’s life but you hate the idea that other people can be. Sometimes, it’s easier to put your phone down and pretend you don't exist, pretend that staring at the wall will make it all better. It doesn’t.

Trevor

NEPTUNE You’re the forgotten one. It doesn’t matter where you go, but you’re the forgotten one. You don’t mean to be, it’s not something you enjoy - it makes you feel alienated and makes you sink further, further than you’d ever like to admit to another living human being. You haven’t quite found the select few that would die for you - and if you have, you haven’t realized it yet, have you? You have your doubts - and that’s okay, really, it’s hard to trust when you’re always being left behind. You’re not lesser for it. Regardless of whether you’re left behind physically, emotionally, or academically, it’s okay. It’s okay to take more time than you need and it’s okay to be slower than others, because that’s how you’re wired and you need to be told that that’s okay. It’s in our nature to be different, to be individual - that’s what makes us special, no? Not a single perfect replica in the world - and you need to own that. It’s easier said than done, but there’s never going to be another you and you need to accept that to get your life in order, to do what you want to do. Take a look at your priorities, at your life, see what’s making you miserable. It’ll be glaringly obvious when you do. And, perhaps, give yourself an apology.

[novapopstar]

Let me tell a story about true love and loss.

This is one of my favorite stories to tell. And at the same time, its one of the hardest. You don't really get second chances. But if you were able to take that second chance in something you horribly screwed up on, you would take it, wouldn't you? This is gonna sound exactly like those very cliche white boy romance movies that try to be kinda edgy, i know it does in the beginning. Ive lived long enough to know that. But she... She was everything to me. Ive lived so long feeling nothing. She brought a spark to my dead soulless empty life. She was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. Its the reason i took that second chance. She can never know i exist. It was the beginning of summer of 2015. The final day of high school. I finished the exam at least an hour and a half early. And as most 18 year olds do, i put my earbuds in at full blast and passed out at my desk without a care in the world. Im awoken by an earthquake. The worst earthquake imaginable. My name is being screeched by what i can only describe is a Pterodactyl. I pull my headphones out of my ears. "What, Kamyrn?" I am not a happy boy. "The bell rang like 15 minutes ago." Are you serious? "You...didnt wake me up sooner?" The pterodactyl shrugs. "Didnt seem like i needed to just yet." I shouldve punched him right through his ginger face. He had a pale complexion, although more color than mine, freckles on his nose and cheeks, bright green eyes and the most irish looking red hair youve ever seen. Hes actually Italian. Hes basically what you call a cinnamon roll in meme terms. "So theres a music venue happening tonig-" "Nope." I stand up quickly, fix my bangs, and throw my hood up. I tried to bee line for the door but the fucker is always faster. I do NOT do social gatherings. Hes lucky i even talked to him. "Cmon, Tyyyyy! I want you to meet my friends. Theyre playing tonight!" "You know i dont like social events. I cant handle them. Besides i have to get home an-" He grabs my arms and pleads with his eyes. "Just this once? Pleaaaase?" I sigh. I hated it when he did that. I loved him so much i could hardly say no to him most of the time. "Fine. When do we go?" "We can start heading over right now. Theyre setting up and we can watch them warm up!" "You actually seem more cheery than normal. Anything special happening tonight?" "The Goddess, Tyler!!" Of course. "The Goddess" was a girl named Diana. The love of his life. She was literally too perfect. Beautiful black flowing hair, the deepest of blue eyes, beautifully pale skin, the most perfect smile. The sight caused Kamryn to become speechless. Especially since her father was there at the venue. The venue was basically as normal as you can get i guess. Smelled of sweat and heartbreak. The colors were a mix of greys and more greys. It was a really spacious area with some dining tables and chairs. I believe there was a bar at one end of the room. And right in the back was a big stage where they kept all the equipment for the bands. Big speakers lined the sides of the stage including the top of walls for surround sound in the building. This....this was the place i met her. Kamyrn was being interrogated by Dianas father, Marcus. Kamyrn sweating profusely. I mean, i dont blame him. Marcus was ripped and that rugged look and deep voice of his was something to feel threatened about. If you can picture what a roman soldier looked like, ya got Marcus. Diana was giggling and watching Kamyrn squirm the whole time. My senses were broken when the lights dimmed down and the first show was about to start. And as if an Angel has glided across the stage, she appeared. She was the most stunning thing i had ever laid eyes one. Shoulder length chestnut hair, from afar youd think they were green but she actually had hazel eyes, she had the sweetest smile, and i cant forget the red streaks in her hair. Her voice was something of an angel. And i caught myself staring. Ive never been a believer in love at first sight, but, damn... There was no mistaking it. I had slowly began to fall for her that night. But of course, i always have something come up to ruin my moments of bliss. Heres the part where things get complicated as all hell. I finished that graduation exam an hour and a half early because, ive taken it at least 25 times by now. At least at that school. I passed with flying colors because i know all the answers a little too well. The reason is the dumbest reason you have ever heard of. Im an 182 year old, as of 2015, vampire with the body of an 18 year old. All my features resemble a scrawny emo kid. Right down to the black nails, the black eyeliner, and the black emo hair. My purple eyes are natural however. Right now im having what is called Cravings. Now listen, i do not love being a vampire. Ive been running from that life for years. So i cringe at the thought of feeding off a humans. But at this moment in time, i am in need NOW. Therefore i cannot just waltz over to the nearest bloodbank and "charm speak" my way into dinner. I had to do my best to leave the venue without causing suspicion. I keep my eyes closed as i turn to Kam, holding a hand to my head. "Kam, dude im really sorry. The whole social thing is really getting to me. I really have to head out. I do not feel well." "Im really glad you tried to make it though, Ty. Ill check in on you later okay?" I nod and make the horrible mistake of opening my eyes. Kamryn wasnt looking however. But someone else did. My eyes tend to change color depending on the need. Right now theyre clearly gold. Gold for hunger. I quickly make my way out into the alley way. I hate every second of this. The alley smells like rotting shit and cat piss. Its the least of my worries. But its all i can smell. I need that trace of blood. Now. This isnt fun for me. I hate having to walk up to an unsuspecting human and trick them into letting me feed. This woman didnt deserve it. But they dont know what theyre doing when the "charm speak" is involved. Im able to pin her to the wall at this point, shes moaning in pleasure very loudy as i sink my teeth into her neck. I want to vomit. But i swallow and keep it down. She slumps down the wall unconscious. I didnt bleed her out, i never drink enough for that to happen. I fix her body in a way that when she wakes up, she'll think she just passed out from intoxication. Poor girl.. "A vampire? Never wouldve thought." I spin around, blood sorta dripping from my chin. I had made sure i was alone. It was just Marcus. But i didnt know why Marcus would have known. "Clean yourself, boy." I dont even blink as i wipe my chin furiously. "W-why did you follow me?" "I know the actions of a vampire when they need to feed. You showed clear signs back at the venue. I also saw those eyes of yours." "Well, what do you want from me?" He smiled wide. "Youre obviously no threat if youve been living the human world for so long. You nearly looked like death feeding off that woman." I looked defeated. "I didnt have the time to make it to a bloodbank, sir." Needless to say, i was taken back to venue after it was all cleared out. Kamryn looked worried as hell when i got back. "Dude, are you okay? I thought you were going home?" I smiled weakly. "I just needed to take a walk. Marcus found me to tell me to come back so i could meet your friends." Kam flashed a big smile. "Well the only one thats still here is-" "Emma." The Angel had spoken. Kam decided that was good enough and had walked over to flirt with his goddess. "So, a vampire huh?" I blinked. "Im sorry..?" She pointed to the shoulder area of my jacket. The fact Kam never noticed still annoys me. She laughs. "Thats not really the reason. I just know." She smirked. "Ive seen a few in my day. None looked like you though. Why are you trying so hard to seem human?" I felt it was pointless at this point. "I despise vampires." "So you despise yourself?" "Precisely." "Does Kamryn know?" "He can never know." She nods in understanding. "So yeah, im Emma Grayson." She extends her arm and i shake it nervously. Her hands were always so soft. Not to mention calloused. But the best hands ive ever held. "Tyler Deravious." This Tyler didnt realize what he was getting himself into. How this meeting would change his life for the worst. You dont get a third chance. If i could turn back, i would. I cannot begin to tell you the regret i feel writing this all down. I ended up leaving my apartment that i had been illegally living in for years now and i moved into the mansion that i never knew existed in chicago. This mansion housed demon slayers. An immortal roman soldier demon slayer and his adopted daughter. I had chosen to slay demons as well. Including my kind. Things only get more complicated from here. ------------- So im thinking about writing a story out that ive had in my mind since 2015. Im not the best at writing but maybe i can get better along the way if i stick with it. I dont have a name for it yet, but heres the prototype Prologue for my most favorite story ive thought of. This story is an emotional rollercoaster. But it follows the life of Tyler Deravious, a Rogue Vampire who hates the thought of being a vampire. He becomes a demon slayer and learns what its like to have a family after so many years. Falls in love. Learns to be less awkward and more brave. He has to help defeat a great evil that threatens to destroy Chicago, and maybe the world if hes not careful. It might just turn out too much for him. Im really hoping i can do something with this. Its all original! So take my shitty prologue and give me some critiques.