#I HAVE SO MANY EMOTIONS AROUND THIS SCENE

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

So with some of the takes I've been seeing in the Wandee Goodday tag, I wanted to share my perspective.

Just to note - I firmly believe art is subjective and what we see can vary a great deal based on our own perspectives and lived experiences. I'm not calling anyone wrong, I'm just saying this is my personal take on things. (I feel like this should be obvious, but nuance is so often lost online).

And my main goal with watching QL is fun and escapism. I'm here to have a good time. I tend to go with the flow, I like imperfect characters (I even like the fucked-up ones), and I trust the characterization and plot elements to be doing what they need to do until a problem shows within the narrative itself.

Ok, disclaimers done - here's my take on Dee & Yak's interactions around the fake dating idea.

I think all of their interactions are deeply affected by the degree to which they have already developed genuine feelings for each other, but are not yet in a place to admit it, even to themselves.

Do I think Yak has real concerns about being out as a boxer trying to hit a career high? Absolutely. But I think his quick jump to a "let's end this" reaction was mostly a kneejerk attempt to protect himself for what he felt when Dee, the man he is already emotionally connected to, and desperately wants to be able to kiss, dropped a request for fake dating over a real deepening of their relationship.

We don't yet know the level of societal homophobia this show is aiming for, BL land can go many different ways with this, but considering his brother's openness in the gym that he owns, training boxers, there is a tone being set. Yak literally holds hands with Dee in the middle of the street. He doesn't panic when people recognize him at the hospital. This may change, but I'm going to trust the signposts that his career concerns are valid, yes, but are not the dominant issue between them.

Similarly, is Dee competitive and overly focused on winning? Clearly. It's set up in his earlier conversation with Yak for a reason. But at the same time, his insistence that it has to be Yak is not just about his need to win - again, this is about genuine feeling. He wants Yak. This is a way to get Yak, and to frame it to himself in a way that feels less scary and vulnerable, especially after being hurt by Ter.

I know a lot of people saw Dee as being pushy. I do agree with that, and yes it is going to cause more issues for them in the future. But I wish more people also saw Yak holding firm to his boundaries and refusing to give in to the immature behavior from Dee, showing why he's such a good partner for Dee.

And sure, we haven't seen Dee support Yak as much so far, but the scene with the mother and child wasn't there just for kicks. Dee is empathetic and caring, and that will be important in his relationship with Yak as well. He is there for people when things are at their worst.

Some people see Dee on the bridge as being manipulative.

I saw Dee as finally cutting out the toddler shit and being emotionally real about why he's taking the scholarship too seriously, how sensitive he is to what people think of him, why Yak is someone he trusts implicitly, and how he knows it's not Yak's problem and it isn't fair to expect him to fix it.

Some people see Yak as finally agreeing to fake date as showing he is weak to emotional manipulation.

I see a man who has more agency than that. I see a man who is affected by seeing genuine vulnerability both because of how caring he is as an individual, and because of how much he wants a real emotional connection to Dee. And eyes-open, he makes a choice.

These are two characters who have never just been friends with benefits from the beginning. And the narrative has never been about what they are saying. It's about what they are feeling.

[destieltropecollection]

Destiel Trope Collection 2024 | Day 20: Canon Compliant

hunger | @autisticandroids Rating: Explicit Word Count: 1,632 Main Tags/Warnings: Endverse Cas/Dean, Endverse, Bittersweet, Discussion of Lazarus Rising, Angel True Forms, Dirty Talk, Fade to Black Summary: Endverse Cas talks about what it was like to have Dean inside him.

There'll be peace when you are done - are you done? | @brainfuzz Rating: General Word Count: 3,216 Main Tags/Warnings: Post-Finale, Post-Episode: s15e20 Carry On,Post-Canon Fix-It,Fix-It Summary: Like most fans, I thought the final episode was terrible. I also thought were gaps that made no sense, and not just the missing people (who was Sam's wife, really), but gaps in the story. The biggest gaps for me were the “find anything? Yeah I got something” leading to a pie festival, which somehow abruptly turned into a vampire clown clownpires, clowpires? hunt, with no explanation of how that happened. So, I figured it out. And fixed the ending so it made sense all at the same time.

no proof one touch | @watchinghimrakeleaves Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 5,389 Main Tags/Warnings: Post-Finale, Love Confessions, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Dean Winchester in Heaven, Castiel and Dean Winchester Reunion in Heaven, Castiel is Jack Kline's Parent, Everyone Ships Castiel/Dean Winchester Summary: When Castiel learns that Dean has entered heaven, he's determined to avoid him to save them both the pain of dealing with his confession. Dean is equally as determined to find him, leading him to put up signs for Cas anywhere he thinks the angel might be.

Day after day, sorrow in his heart | @silver-stake-through-the-heart Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 20,058 Main Tags/Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Dean Winchester, Castiel (Supernatural), Alastair (Supernatural), Jack Kline, Mary Winchester, Sam Winchester, God | Chuck Shurley, POV Dean Winchester, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Angst, Emotional Hurt, Mental Breakdown, Self-Loathing, Suicidal Ideation, Suicide Attempt, Pining Dean Winchester, References to John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Brief Lisa Braeden/Dean Winchester, Self-Blaming Dean Winchester, Nightmares, Castiel's Handprint (Supernatural), Episode: s04e01 Lazarus Rising (Supernatural), Temporarily Human Castiel (Supernatural), Demon Dean Winchester Arc, Godstiel Arc, Dean Winchester's Season 13 Widower Arc, Castiel and Dean Winchester's Season 15 Divorce Arc, Episode: s15e18 Despair - Castiel's Confession Scene (Supernatural), Post-Episode AU: s15e19 Inherit the Earth (Supernatural), Hopeful Ending Summary: Everything begins when he crawls out of a tomb with no name, where he's been buried alone. So alone, in fact, there isn't a single living soul miles and miles around. Everything begins earlier, but he can't remember it. Everything begins later, in a barn, and each second of it is engraved in his memory. There are so many beginnings for this story, and so many ends—each and every one breaking his heart.

An Abundance of Light (WIP) | @presentlydean & catidono (AO3) Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 56,340 Main Tags/Warnings: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester, Donna Hanscum & Jody Mills, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester, Castiel & Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester, Castiel & Jack Kline, Slow Burn, Original Characters - Freeform, nephilim & cambion, Jack as God, hunter hub Sam Winchester, Eileen deserved better 2k22, Internalized Homophobia, Canon-Typical Internalized Homophobia, Suicidal Thoughts, Self-Isolation, self-destructive behaviors, Communication Issues, Canon-Typical Violence, Angst with a Happy Ending, kissing for comfort and also gay, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Past Child Abuse, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Panic Attacks, conflicting love languages, They're stupid your honor Summary: Jack’s new rules for heaven are simple: no intervening in human affairs. But when Dean is mortally wounded on a hunt, that simple directive becomes impossible for Castiel to follow, so he does what he does best and rebels, returning to earth to save Dean. But life on earth after Chuck is more complicated than any of them could have predicted. Dean retreats from the world, Castiel struggles to meet Jack’s expectations, and Castiel’s deathbed confession still hangs unresolved between them. They are free now, but having freedom and knowing what to do with it are two different things. After years of trauma and pain, learning to make a different kind of choice—a kind that will allow them to heal—is easier said than done.

Far From Heaven: Part One | @Taymarpigeon Rating: Explicit Word Count: 102,086 Main Tags/Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Heavy Angst, Gratuitous Smut, Fluff, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Top/Bottom Versatile Castiel/Dean Winchester, Hurt/Comfort, Dean Winchester Has Internalized Homophobia, Homophobic John Winchester, Extremely Dubious Consent, Wing Kink, Canon-Typical Violence, Angelic Grace as Lube (Supernatural)Angelic Grace-Powered Orgasms (Supernatural)Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Dom/sub, POV Alternating, BDSM, Risk Aware Consensual Kink Summary: For years people have joked about Dean and Cas being boyfriends, Dean shrugged it off 'cause, well, reasons. As for Cas? Well he's Cas! Probably didn't even know what his dick was for before Metatron stole his Grace. But Metatron did steal his Grace. Cas is human now. And Dean certainly knows what his dick is for. Sometimes a relationship doesn't start with flowers and a boombox held on your shoulder outside your crush's bedroom window. Sometimes it starts with a homicidal Angel, a failed date, and arguing in a storm.

[hippopotamusdreamer]

SKZ Code: Behind the Scenes

genre. A (heavy), F (eventually at the end)

warnings. Cheating, gaslighting, arguing, grabbing, cursing, swearing

additional notes. Female! Reader | You/Your pronouns, reader is aged between Hyunjin and Han, includes all members of Stray Kids

pairing. Yoon Jeonghan x Reader, Platonic!Felix x Reader, ot8 x 9th member reader

w.c. 7.6K

synopsis. Things get heated as emotional problems follow Y/N on set after an overdue encounter with her boyfriend. So what happens when something happens to triggers that fresh memory?

a/n. This is my first ever "published" kpop fic...be nice to me LMAO After having watched SKZ CODE ep. 40, that scene between Hyunjin and Han really stuck with me and just would not get out of my head, thus, this is the result. Constructive criticism would be nice, I feel like I added a lot of detail and it could get muddled and just become a wall of text, let me know what you think.

This in no way reflects the actual persons involved/based in this fic, nor their actual character. This is purely fiction.

Friday, 11:53 PM, unknown club in Hongdae

There were people all around you. Many of which were bumping and grinding on each other as they enjoyed themselves in all corners of the darkened building. The bass that reverberated throughout the entire club you were currently in was thumping so loud that you couldn’t differentiate it from the wild beating of your heart. The thrumming in your body kept you grounded as you walked through the dense crowd. LEDs were blinking with multicolored filters and there were even a few fog machines that made the place more hip than cliché. Unfortunately, the constant flashing of said lights made the oncoming headache you had, worse.

God, you wanted to leave.

You weren’t even supposed to be there in the first place. But you had gotten a text from Nayeon an hour earlier that just had “???” and then immediately after a photo of what looked like your boyfriend looking really fucking cozy with some girl for someone who had supposedly stayed late for practice at his company that night.

So there you were, in some random club in Hongdae, trying to keep yourself from turning into a mess. Dating ban be damned, you weren’t the only idol that had tried to date in secret, and you certainly wouldn’t be the last. Yet in this instance, as you made your way to the second floor VIP area, maybe you should have just followed the rules instead…

Was sneaking out of your dorm at the risk of your reputation and that of your group to get some answers a good idea? Absolutely not. And having had left yours and Hyunjin’s nightly skin care routine; claiming a, now very real, headache to go there didn’t make it any better. You’d be in for the scolding of a lifetime if any of the guys were to find out you where you were.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Saturday, 12:45 AM, VIP lounge, unknown club in Hongdae

Moving past the bouncer of the VIP section, Nayeon walked up, having waited for you to come. One look at your distressed state and she quickly pulled you into a hug. Letting go and without another word she turned you to the left and you finally came face to face with what you had been hoping was misunderstanding until this very moment.

Just like it had been in the photo Nayeon had sent earlier, there he was. An overly relaxed looking Jeonghan manspreading in his seat as an unknown pretty girl, who looked far too comfortable for it to be their first time together like this, sat perched on his lap. You both watched as she leaned down to whisper in his ear, placing her hand none too subtly on his chest in the process. The grin he gave her as he wrapped his arm around her waist was what snapped you out of your stupor.

“Y/N, wait!” Nayeon yelled after you as you finally found the will to move forward. Certain now that the thrumming you felt earlier was your heart and not the music.

You were practically in front of them and yet they paid you no mind. In their own little bubble, ignorant to the storm inside you. “Yah… Yoon Jeonghan, are you fucking kidding me?”

Jeonghan glanced at you slowly, like he hadn’t a care in the world for whoever was interrupting him, only to sit up from his slouched position, eyes wide in shock. Instantly pulling away from the girl that had basically plastered herself onto him. “Y-Y/N! What are you doing here?” He managed to stutter out, frantically looking around, unsure of how you got there.

“I should be asking you the same thing. The PLEDIS building sure got a damn upgrade since the last time I was there,” the venom in your voice apparent even over the loud music.

“Baby, please, it’s not what it looks like!” He gets up from his seat to get into your personal bubble to be heard. You see from your peripheral that the girl he was with slink off to somewhere else. The booming of the music made it hard to hear him but it’s easy to tell that he was trying to make excuses. Jeonghan probably felt the same way because in the next instance he was grabbing you by the arm and all but dragged you to the outside smoking balcony. You try to jerk free but he’s stronger than you, though he is struggling.

“Let me go!”

The balcony is empty of other people surprisingly and the music is still loud out there but at least you’re able to hear each other better as he whorls around to face you.

“Not until you hear me out!”

“There’s nothing for me to hear! It looks like my boyfriend was about to get Real. Fucking. Personal. With. Someone. Else.” You punctuate each word with a jab to his chest.

He grabs on to the appendage only to then forcefully let go as he steps away from you. The tick in his jaw letting you know he was already annoyed.

Good. So were you.

“Look would you just chill the fuck out! We weren’t even doing anything.”

“…She was sitting on your lap and you weren’t doing shit about it…”

“So she was sitting on my lap, who the fuck cares?”

“I do! And as my “boyfriend”, you should have had some respect for your partner and not do shit like that! How do you think that makes me feel Jeong?”

“Oh my god babe, it’s not that serious,” he says as he rolls his eyes, as if exasperated. He raked a hand through his hair, frustration evident in his body language.

“Ok, so if you were to see me with some random guy in the position you were in just now, it’d be fine? Is what you’re telling me?” You question hypothetically while aggressively gesturing to the building behind you.

“Babe…”

“No, I want to understand. Cause you’re saying it wasn’t that bad right? So I can just go inside and find some guy to get with and you’ll be ok with it, right?”

“…You’re starting to piss me off.”

“News flash, I’m already pissed off. If Nayeon hadn’t—”

“Nayeon? Oh yeah,” he spat out as he rolled his neck, “now it makes so much fucking sense. You know she fucking hates me babe, hasn’t liked me since you introduced us eight months ago. I told you she’s not a good friend if she keeps trying to break us up.”

“Oh my god, not this again...,” Now it’s your turn to roll your eyes.

“She’s always putting shit inside your head about us! She’ll say anything—"

“That’s not the fucking point right now! The point is that if you’re willing to do this in front of people, what kind of things are you doing when no one’s a-fucking-round! I know what I saw Jeonghan!”

“Jesus fuck! I made out with someone one time at a party and now you hold it over my head!”

“Because if DK and I hadn’t’ve caught you you probably would have slept with her! You practically had your hand up her dress that time!”

“She literally means nothing to me!”

“So, you’re willing to risk our relationship for nothing?”

“You’re being so dramatic right now for no reason!”

“No reason?” You were stunned.

“It’s not that big a deal! God, if I had known that you were going to be this insecure about our relationship, I wouldn’t have even asked you out!”

“I’m only like this because of what you did!”

The both of you were far too into your heated argument to notice that the door to the balcony open and close.

Only a split second passed as Jeonghan latched onto your arm tightly again and got in your face. You whimper out at the sudden contact knowing full well you’d most likely have a hand shaped bruise to cover up later.

You wince as pain radiates up your arm.

“Let’s get one thing fucking straight—”

But he never got the chance to finish his sentence as he was forcefully yanked away from you. The familiar multicolored hair of you bandmember stands in front of you as Jeonghan nurses his now bruising cheek.

“Felix…?” You whisper in wonder. What was he doing there? How did he know where to find you? Your heart picks up from the adrenaline of this night.

“Don’t you ever put your hands on her again, do you hear me?” Felix said evenly, glaring daggers at Jeonghan. Felix may have been shorter than him but in that moment, he was the most intimidating of the two.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Saturday, 2:19 AM, Felix’s bedroom – VOCALRACHA dorm

You sat in the back of the blacked-out car that Felix has pulled up in. The driver giving the two of you a moment as Felix comforts your hunched over crying form.

You had learned that when you had first confronted Jeonghan, Nayeon had a feeling something would go wrong and immediately went to call Felix. He had been in the middle of playing one of his games when he got the call and proceeded to also sneak out if his dorm to meet her at the front of the club. From there, he got the gist of the information and made his way upstairs with the thought of being a mediator. Only with what he witnessed, it quickly put an end to that idea.

It was Felix who had opened the door to the balcony in the middle of your argument and lost it when Jeonghan put his hands on you.

After that was a bit of a blur for you as Nayeon and Felix maneuvered you through the club discreetly in case someone saw and the media get a hold of that information. All you knew is that Jeonghan tried to come at the two of you but the 63 taekwondo medal holder put him in his place. Felix eventually managed to get you out of there safely but not before letting you confirm out loud that it was officially over between you and Jeonghan.

Jeonghan was too busy writhing in pain to argue back.

So here you were, finally allowing yourself to feel all the emotions of the night, crying into Felix as he pats your hair soothingly, protective arm wrapped around you.

“I’m sorry you had to come out h-here,” you hiccup.

“It’s alright Jellybean, I’m just glad I got there in time to stop him from doing anything more to you. How’s your arm?”

Sniffling, you pull back from him and shift your arm forward. He turns on the flashlight from his phone to see and the both of you come face to face with the repercussions of angry actions. As you thought, an outline of bruised digits were beginning to form like a bad tattoo on your bicep.

He sucks a breath between his teeth as he ghosts his fingers over the bruise. He’s silent as he tries to reel in his anger as he fights himself on going back inside and beating the shit out of the other idol.

But one look at your tear-stained face stops him.

“I’ll tell Chan and Lee Know-hyung that I called you over to our dorm later so they won’t go looking for you. That way you can just stay in my room.”

“Oh Lix, you don’t have—”

“No it’s ok, I don’t think you should be alone right now and I’m pretty sure you don’t want anyone to know about what happened.”

You stay quiet because you know he’s right. Reluctantly, you nod at his offer, grateful for the angel of your group.

He gives you a small sad smile as he brings you back into his arms, placing a comforting kiss on your head. Doesn’t say a word when you quietly start to cry again; just continues to pat your hair as the driver comes back into the car and takes the both of you back to Felix’s dorm.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

You spent a total of 5 days in Felix’s room, crying. You finally managed to explain to Felix that you and Jeonghan had been secretly dating for about 10 months until then but that he had already cheated one you at least once, that you know of, before at an after party of one of the award shows. One of Jeonghan’s members had been with you when you caught him in the act and had gotten you out of there before a scene was caused.

You’d forgiven him after some heavy persuasion on his part but that left you feeling insecure about the relationship since it happened just about a month ago. He’d always had anger issues, but the night at the club was the first time he ever tried to grab you like that. When Nayeon eunnie messaged you that Friday night about seeing him with a different girl this time; you had to confront him before he had a chance to deny it.

You felt bad but Felix kept reassuring you that it was ok that you stayed there and that made you want to cry more. As he promised, he messaged the oldest members of your whereabouts. And with good timing too since according to Chan, Hyunjin had went into your room Saturday morning to wake you for the morning skin routine, but you were gone and he was about ready to freak out.

After that first night, Felix came up with the plan to say that you got hit with a weird bug and that it’d be too much of a hassle to move you back to your room in the 3RACHA dorm (plus  you and Hyunjin) so you might as well just stay in his room for the time being. Minho came to check on you that night, but Felix managed to convince him that it wasn’t bad enough to go to the hospital; you just needed to rest and eat something not too heavy. It wasn’t that far off from the truth honestly, and it was a good excuse to stop anyone else from checking up on you.

So Felix’s room was now a designated “quarantine zone” and no one was allowed to go in and bother you. Felix being the only one able to go in and out since it was his room after all. Your phone had been bombarded with texts from all your members trying to check up on you, pinging every few minutes with memes and well wishes. It wasn’t until you kept getting back-to-back calls and texts from your now ex-boyfriend that you turned off your phone, not wanting to deal with him now or ever again.

Just like you thought, the bruise on your arm had gotten darker and it was easy to tell what had caused it. With just one glance at your arm, you knew that with how protective the guys were over you, that the entirety of Stray Kids would go looking for a fight with your ex and your group absolutely did not need any heat in the media right now. It was hard enough keeping Lix from going out there once he looked at your arm again and taking matters into his own hands. Let alone all eight of them if word got out.

No, you had just wanted to wallow in self-pity for now.

Currently, Felix sat next to you in bed as you lay curled up by his side. He was letting you know that Chan had stopped by again to check on you when you were asleep earlier and had left you your designated SKZOO, a bear cub named Gom-N/N-ie, to “help you feel bettah.” You felt guilty for lying to him, all of them really, after that while accepting your SKZOO from the sunshine man. Bringing it to your chest, you bury your face in the familiar feeling of your plushie.

“You know you don’t have to go tomorrow, right? We can tell the managers that you’re sick, too,” Felix’s deep voice broke through the quiet of the room from his spot next to you as he gently combed his fingers through your hair. Tomorrow all of you were to begin shooting for a special new episode of SKZ Code for Chuseok. You’d completely forgot about it until you overheard Minho and Innie talking about it outside of the door earlier.

You were quiet for a moment, contemplating on what you should say and do. You know you can’t keep hiding out in Felix’s room like this, it’s not fair to him. He doesn’t like lying to the other members either yet is doing it just for your sake. He’s been working hard to deflect any and all questions, comments and concerns about your wellbeing while also placating everyone else. You’ve definitely put your younger member in a difficult position.

You owe him a lot, your little sunshine.

“…I’ll go.”

His hand stills in your hair, waiting to see if you’ll say anything else.

“I’ll go with everyone tomorrow. You’re probably sick of me being in here anyways,” you quietly laugh out.

“Naur, what?” His Aussie accent coming out as he switches from Korean to English and back again. “I’m not sick of you, I could never be. If anything, the others are jealous cause I’m the only one that’s gotten to see you!”

“That’s such a lie, Lee Yongbok!” you finally laugh out loud for the first time since Friday night while swatting him in the leg playfully.

“It’s true, noona! Binnie Hyung was about ready to tackle me to get inside the room yesterday!”

The image alone of your buff bun trying to tackle your sunshine lad had you in stitches. What you didn’t see was the loving gaze of said sunshine, glad to see you at least somewhat happy again after everything that’s happened.

For this moment in time, that’s all he could ask for.

Felix gently grazes his fingers over your bruised arm, his smile slightly faltering at what he sees. Moving his hand back to your hair, he gently pulls a few strands just to get your attention.

“It’s gonna be ok, you know. I’ll be there to help you if you need it, alright? You’re not gonna be alone.”

“I know Lix…thank you. For everything.,” you respond quietly.

His only action is to bend down and give you another comforting forehead kiss. The two of you remain quiet for the rest of the night until it was time for bed.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Thursday, 8:15 AM, VOCALRACHA dorm

As soon as you followed Felix out of the bedroom, you were accosted by the one and only  maknae on top.

“Noona!” Jeongin yelled out, too loud for what time it was. “Are you feeling better? Do you need more medicine, a doctor?”

“Yah! Let her breathe.” The three of you jump in the middle of the hallway as the admonishing tone of Minho could be distinguished from the kitchen. He’d probably heard Innie from all the way over there.

Chuckling, you give him a small smile and a pat to his head to calm him down.

“I’m ok right now Innie, thank you for checking up on me.”

“You really had us worried noona, Lee Know-hyung was about to burst in there and take you to the hospital himself as soon as he found out you weren’t feeling good if it weren’t for Felix hyung.”

You’d figured something like that was bound to happen. You were even more grateful to Felix for all his efforts. You giggle at his comment and the three of you continue to the kitchen where Seungmin was also waiting.

“Morning everyone,” you greeted, sitting down next to the second youngest of you all.

“Are you sure you’re feeling ok enough to shoot today?” Seungmin asks quietly while placing a cup of juice in front of you which you gratefully take. You nod in agreeance as a bowl of porridge is placed in front of you. Minho pats your head before walking away to get the other dishes for breakfast.

“We’ll let the director-nim know that you should take it easier today at least,” he says while serving the rest of the guys at the table. Before you can protest, he sends you a heated look that leaves no room for argument.

With a twitch to your lips, you can’t help but to agree with him too. “I understand, thank you for breakfast.”

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Thursday, 11:15 AM – SKZ Code shoot location, dressing room 1

Meeting the other half of your group went just about the same. Except more scolding from Hyunjin for skipping out on your daily routine. Although that was mostly an excuse because he was just so worried when he didn’t see you in your room that first morning.

“Really Y/N-ie, you should have messaged me first!” the pout on his lips not hard to find as he tugs on your sleeve.

“Y/N-ah, you should have seen him!” the boisterous voice of Changbin joins the two of you as you sit in your designated dressing room waiting for your leader’s return. The two of them immediately ambushing you, much like Jeongin this morning, upon your arrival. “He wouldn’t stop bothering Channie hyung for information on how you were doing!”

That evokes the lankier one of the two to get flustered and from there the two start a playful argument of no-I-wasn’t’s and yes-you-were’s. Just being with them again really did set your mind and heart at easy after the past couple of days. Not to mention a good distraction.

A quiet “noona” catches your attention from the squabble in front of you and has you turning to face Han questioningly.

“I brought you a red ginseng drink to keep your health up today.”

You wanted to cry again for an altogether different reason. Your members cared for you so much, each in their own different ways. You don’t know what you’d do without them.

“Ahh, thank you, Hannie. I’ll drink this right now.” The initial taste of the ginger is gross but it had a hint of sweetness at the end so the overall drink wasn’t too bad. Especially if you try to take it all in one go.

Han sits next to you on the couch, Felix following shortly after, as I.N and Minho join in on the fray to annoy the already hyped-up boys. Although they could all be loud and wild sometimes, it was just a part of their charm.

Chan comes back into the room about 5 minutes later gaining everyone’s attention.

“Alright, I got everything squared away with the director and producers. Y/N, they know you’re just getting better,” he states, staring directly at you as if he—, no there was no way, right? “So, you’re going to be given more of the easier things to do alright?”

The panic in your head only allows you to nod at him as you grab Felix’s hand for a quiet support. He doesn’t skip a beat in intertwining your hands together.

“Great, we’ve got 10 minutes before they want us to start going to make up and changing. Then we’re all going to film an intro piece for the episode. Anyone have any questions or problems with that?

When no one responded, Chan just nods and heads to the far corner and sits with his phone for a bit. You can’t help but think you feel his gaze every once in a while but brush it off as paranoia.

The time eventually comes to split off as the boys go to their own designated dressing room and you stay in the current one. The stylists helping you to get ready for what is surely to be an interesting shoot if the hanbok you have to wear is anything to go off of.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Thursday, 1:15 PM – SKZ Code shoot location

[I.N - Lee Know's younger sister, Yongbok and Y/N's aunt]

[Changbin - High school jock / Always steps up to keep his family together]

[HAN - A sweet but strict father (But somewhat seems polite)]

[Hyunjin - The sassy mother]

[Lee Know - A tough woman but a lenient mother to Yongbok and Y/N]

[Seungmin - Survives through the attacks by Lee Know, I.N, and daughter’s Y/N and Yongbok]

[Yongbok - Sassy and brave like his mom, sister, and aunt]

[Bang Chan - The youngest son, loves his mom the most and hates his brother / Is always losing out to cousin Yongbok]

[Y/N – The exasperated oldest of the grandkids back from university/ Yongbok’s sister]

One rainy Chuseok morning, the SKZ Family are gathering in a long while today CHUSEOK SPECIAL : SKZ Family Returns

You stand off to the side, waiting for your cue to join, with the rest of the group as Channie and Felix do the beginning of the intro skit. It’s hard to keep the giggles in with how cute the both of them look and act.

“Hi...,” Chan started out shyly.

“Hi!” Felix sassed out immediately in response.

“How old are you?”

Felix counts slowly with his fingers, “…Three. How about you?”

“I’m five. I’m older than you.”

Felix plucks out two more digits to make five on his hand.

“You’re right.”

“Mm”

“You don’t look older though.”

“Why are you talking down to me?”

“Mind your own business.”

“Don’t talk down to me!”

“Don’t yell!”

“Okay…,” Chan whispers out. “Mommy!”

“Daddy!”

They both start crying and that’s your you cue to walk into the frame behind them.

“Hey! Stop crying!”

“Noona!” “Eunnie!”

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Filming was going smoothly so far. It was just the beginning though so nothing too taxing had happened yet. Felix just finished introducing himself as three-year-old Yongbok who gets her good looks from her mom and wants to live with her mother after their divorce.

“Waaah, my little sister is so cute,” you say out loud with a smile, Felix sticking his tongue out at you in response.

“Yes, both of my daughters are so cute,” Lee Know says while pinching your cheek since you sat beside him. There went your smile.

“Ahh! Mom!”

“Y/N-ie, it’s your turn to introduce yourself,” Seungmin, as your father, says not even bothering to help you out. You make a noncommittal sound as you fight with Lee Know to let go of your cheek still. More than half the guys laughing at your antics.

“Mom, please!”

“Ohh, but how can I let go of these cheeks huh,” he says in a babying tone, as he does in fact, let you go.

You rub your cheek as you sit down on the stool and face the proper direction.

“Hello, I’m Yongbok’s older sister, Y/N. I’m tirelessly working on maintaining my high marks in school but currently on break from university. So I’m glad to be home and able to spend this time with my family.”

“You get you book smarts from your dad,” Han says chuckling.

“And your street smarts from your mom,” Seungmin joins in. Lee Know, jokingly takes the bubble gun blower in front of him and aims it at his ‘husband’.

“That’s right, so you better watch what you say.”

You’re laughing at the scene before you as Hyunjin continues the skit, “Y/N-ie, what are you studying in college?”

“Uhh,” you didn’t really have a concept for this character, until you lock eyes with Chan and then the kiddie computer in front of him. “I’m studying…m-music producing?” you get out before laughing since producing was certainly not your forte. And everyone in front of you knew that.

“Noona is so cool,” Chan says from his spot on the ground. “Better than my older brother.”

“Aww, thanks Channie,” you beam at him as he beams back.

“Yah Bang Chan!” Binnie yells from behind him before yelling in pain because Chan leaned back against his legs.

“Changbin, don’t yell at you brother,” Hyunjin says as his mom.

“Mmm, my daughter is so talented. Getting in the best university of the country, getting good grades and look at her face, just like me,” He strikes a little pose. “Maybe next holiday she’ll bring home a boyfriend,” Lee Know continues in character.

The smile on your face freezes as your heart zings in pain. You’ve become still in your seat as you feel Felix’s eyes on you. He being the only ones to notice your hands balling into fists on your skirt.

“…Mom,” you start off slowly. Your hesitancy easily mistakable for your character’s young adult/college student love life being interrogated by their parent. “That’s…”

“She doesn’t need to be dating in college,” Seungmin cuts you off. “We met in college and now we’re getting a divorce!”

“Yeah but she won’t meet a mistake like you and go through any hardships. So she’ll be fine .”

Grin faltering, you begin to bite the inside of your lip to stop your eyes from getting glossy. Your nose starting to sting, a tale tell sign that you wanted to cry. Your actual hardships flashing in your mind.

“Mommy, daddy, don’t fight,” Felix tries to distract them.

“We’re not fighting,” Lee Know quickly responds as you get up from your seat to switch places with him. Felix quickly looping his arm around yours, taking your hand in his, giving it a quick squeeze.

You give him one back as you stare at a spot by your feet.

.

.

.

Despite the earlier hiccup, everything was going fine. Both Lee Know and Seungmin went on to introduce themselves, which was a skit about how Lee Know got married for money and that they were in the process of getting a divorce more than anything. And then Innie looking out for his nieces because what was said in front of them.

It was then decided that Yongbok was going with Lee Know and you were going with Seungmin. Both kids pouting at this information for being separated.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Next up was Han, who’s outfit immediately got torn to pieces by everyone in the room. Him trying to explain that he got his style from his father caused everyone to derail in laughter.

He brings back everyone’s attention by restarting his introduction.

“I’m Yongbok and Y/N-ie’s uncle, but I could be their new father.”

“Their new father?” Lee Know questions immediately as you and Felix looked shocked at him.

“I mean, I’ll be that much kinder to them.”

A few of the members understand what he means by that and Hyunjin speaks up in relief, “I was worried.”

“Hey, just a few days ago,” Seungmin speaks up from beside you asking a seemingly innocent question until it wasn’t. “Did you enjoy dinner with the friend I introduced to you?”

There was a pause in the room. Han looking a little shell-shocked as he responds.

“Why are you mentioning that now?”

Everyone’s quiet as Hyunjin gets up from his seated position. Your heartbeat picking up, flashes of your very recent tragedy of a relationship flashing in your mind. All the heartache came rushing back as the scene before you kept unfolding. Your heartbeat picking up in your chest as you look between the two.

“What does that mean?” Hyunjin asked cluelessly.

“You knew mom’s a jealous person!” Changbin yells from his spot next to I.N.

You can’t say anything as the ball of emotions in your throat gets bigger. Felix tries to comfort you but gets pulled away by Lee Know who’s trying to cover his eyes.

“Close your eyes and open your nose,” he says to Felix. If only you could shut out the blood rushing in your ears.

The deep breath that Hyunjin takes is something you felt from deep within your core. “Try explaining yourself.”

“What?”

“Try explaining.”

“You didn’t tell her?” Seungmin jumps in with a grin, making the situation worse. “I thought you did.”

It’s a joke. It’s a joke. It’s a joke.

You repeat to yourself as you try to control your breathing. It’s not their fault that you basically went through something so distressingly similar not even a week ago and they didn’t know about it. Staring at your lap, your hands begin to tremble and you can just feel your lips wobbling.

“Honey,” Han laughs out nervously.

“Was she prettier than me?”

You bring your hands up to cover part of your face. That had been one of many questions that had been plaguing you since the first time Jeonghan had cheated on you. You never got a good look at the first girl and the second girl was definitely pretty to you. You close your eyes, eyebrows furrowing, to try to block out the scene. You hope they can’t here you sniffling.

“…Yaaahh,” is all that Han can respond with, wanting to avoid answering the question.

Did he even feel guilty for what he did? Or did he just move on as if the last 10 months together didn’t mean anything?

 A warm hand on your knee makes you open your eyes and you’re met with Chan’s concerned gaze as your eyesight becomes blurry with the tears quickly gathering there. His concern quickly becomes full on worry as a single tear drops down your cheek.

You needed to get out of there, quickly. It was a wonder how the others haven’t picked up on how upset you’re getting.

“Mom, no one’s prettier than you,” Changbin pipes up as he stands up next to Hyunjin.

“That’s right!”

Did Jeonghan ask his members not to tell you anything? Were they in on everything?

 “Lee Know…?” Han questions.

“Huh?”

“Don’t tell them we met yesterday.”

Would they have told you if they knew? Or did they all laugh about you behind their backs? Did Jeonghan even like you, or did he just keep you around because you were convenient?

This endless cycle of negative questions kept spiraling in your mind as the skit the boys were doing continued to play out before you.

Lee Know, with a grin on his face, turns to look at Hyunjin who’s sat down next to Seungmin again. “It’s fine, I saw someone today too.” Hyunjin says in retaliation as he grabs onto Seungmin.

“Wait a minute…” Han starts but you’ve had enough by this point. The sob you try to hide was heard throughout the group and everyone freezes.

You hurriedly get up from your spot between Seungmin and Felix and trip twice trying to get out of there. The chaos that ensues as the fabric of your hanbok getting caught under your foot was instantaneous as Chan, Changbin, and Felix immediately try to catch you. The small leg space not making it easy to leave quickly.

“Noona?” I.N asks fearfully, breaking character as he sees the state that you’re in.

“Y/N-ah?” Minho asks from his side of the couch starting to get up from his seat.

Han, Seungmin, and Hyunjin quiet in their shock of what’s happening.

“Sorry—,  I—, Please…,” you sob out as you finally get out of the cramped space. Felix and Chan following right behind you as you run to the restroom to lock yourself in there. The door closing in both of their faces. The brief look at your expression, blotchy and covered in tears, breaking their hearts.

You hug yourself as you slide down against the door, finally allowing yourself to cry fully. Even through your sobs, you can hear the other members coming up to the other side of the door to check on you. You could faintly make out the deep timbre of Felix’s voice most likely trying to diffuse the situation which makes you cry more. You weren’t ready to face any of this, or them, now. Should have just stayed home instead of making a mess like this.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed when you heard a gentle knock on the door behind you. Your tears still flowing slowly but at least you weren’t full on sobbing now. Sniffling, you’re hesitant as you look towards the locked doorknob.

“Y/N, it’s just me,” Chan says from the other side. “Everyone else went to go talk to the manager and director to give us a break right now.”

Not saying anything, he clears his throat before asking quietly, “Do you think you can let me in?”

The double entendre isn’t lost on you. Whether Chan knew what he said or not was unknown to you. With some tentativeness, you manage to wiggle to the wall to be able to unlock and open the door for him.

Chan slips into the restroom and closes the door swiftly behind him. You look small to him as you sat huddled into yourself on the ground. Not like your usual boisterous self. He doesn’t say anything as he sits down next to you. Doesn’t pressure you to say anything, either. Just sits with you, waiting patiently for you to be comfortable enough to tell him what’s wrong.

So you sit there in silence for a few moments more. Trying to gather the courage to lay yourself emotionally bare to your leader. You pick at the fabric you have on, sniffling every now and then until Chan gently places his hand over yours in comfort. And to probably stop you from tearing a hole in your clothes…

He lets you play with his hand until you manage to take a deep breath. For the second time since the whole fiasco happened, you find yourself confiding your problem with a member. Going into a bit more detail than what you did with Felix.

You told Chan everything while on the floor in that little restroom.

How you first met Jeonghan, how you kept bumping into him after the shows you all did, how you ended up exchanging numbers. To how you kept in touch after that, kept meeting up until he eventually asked you out. Occasionally sneaking out of the dorm to meet up with him at his insistence.

You thought Chan would get mad at that, but he didn’t say anything. Just squeezed your hand to get you to continue with your story.

You told Chan how you caught Jeonghan cheating the first time, and how DK all but dragged you out of there but it didn’t even matter because you saw everything. That messed you up mentally and was the reason why you had messed up a lot during dance practice the next day.

Chan remembers the day you were talking about. He thought something was wrong but kept it to himself, hoping you’d come talk to him about it, but you never did.

You explained the fight that happened a week after catching him back then. How you eventually, and stupidly, ended up forgiving him and continuing the relationship only for him to go behind your back and do it again a couple of days ago.

“So you weren’t sick?” he cuts in, finally breaking his silence.

“I mean…not in the contagious sense…,” you explain while turning to him. He nods, letting you continue as he tries to wipe the dried tears off your face.

“So yeah, Nayeon called me up that Friday night and I had to sneak out to Hongdae. Sorry…about that by the way…,” you clear your throat, avoiding eye contact with him altogether. “So I saw him literally in the act again and had to confront him about it this time. We ended up going outside and basically just having an all-out screaming match with each other. Where, by the way, he tried to gaslight the shit out of me, but it didn’t work. Thankfully, Felix showed up when he did though because Jeonghan ended up grabbing me really hard. Who knows what he could have done if Lix hadn’t gotten there in time.”

You let go of Chan’s hand, which was still intertwined with yours, to rub against your bruised shoulder.

“Wait…he put his hands on you?”

You don’t pick up on his tone as you nod and take off the jeogori jacket layer of your hanbok. Presenting your, now, heavily bruised arm, Chan takes it delicately in his hands.

“I asked the stylist to try to use coverup on it, but it was just so dark and it still hurt so she couldn’t do much about it in the end.”

Gently, he touches the colorfully marred skin not saying a word, his jaw ticking in anger at what he’s seeing.

You don’t even get a word out before he’s up and bolting out of the restroom. Face clouded in rage.

“Ch-Chan!” Scrambling, you grab the jeogori from the ground and run after him, not even bothering to put it back on. “Chan, wait!”

The other members of your group had managed to clear the room of the staff and had been hovering close the door the entire time, waiting patiently for the two of you to come out. What they weren’t expecting was an infuriated Chan and an anxious you to come out of there.

“What’s happening,” Changbin asked, lowkey getting worked up just seeing his leader on edge.

“I’m gonna kill him,” is all Chan says.

“Who?” Han asks, also getting anxious.

“Noona, what happened to your arm?” Innie asks from beside you, gently grabbing your bruised arm. That captures everyone else’s attention. Your face pales as you realize your mistake.

“Is that a bruise?” “Why does it look like a hand?” “Who the hell touched you?” “Noona, are you ok?”

“I— ,” you’re on the verge of panicking, not knowing what to do.

This catches Chan’s attention and breaks the trance of rage he’s in. He makes his way back to you and brings you into a big hug. He holds you in his arms as you try to hide away from everyone’s prying eyes.

But honestly, they’re just so worried about you.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Channie whispers into your hair. Shaking your head, you understand everyone’s concerns, you just wish it wasn’t revealed this way.

Keeping your face in Chan’s chest to hide, your muffled response is heard. “Long story short, I got into it with an ex a couple of days ago because he was cheating and he…put his hands on me…”

Just like you thought, they were all visibly upset for you.

“This happened to you…and I was…” Han became visibly pale compared to the others as his actions up until you ran out sprang to his mind. That prompted the other boys, besides Felix, to realize why you had gotten upset enough to leave the set in the first place. All of them immediately apologizing to you, getting upset with themselves and begging for your forgiveness.

“Who is it?” Seungmin asks menacingly from somewhere behind you, voice quivering with emotion. Guard dog mode being activated.

“No, guys—”

“He’s gonna wish he only got a bruised arm once I’m done with him,” Changbin says while rolling his neck in annoyance now. Minho and Felix are taking off their own hanbok’s as I.N and Hyunjin stretch out themselves, preparing for a beatdown.

“Noona, seriously, who did this to you?” Han asks you quietly next to you, mood sad yet protective.

“Guys really, there’s nothing to forgive. You didn’t know what was going on, you don’t have to do anything,” You pipe up, finally pulling away from Chan a little. His arms tighten around you slightly, not wanting to let you go fully.

“Y/N, we have every right to want to have your back on this. He’s not gonna get away with putting his hands on you,” Chan explains to you still upset about all the information that you’ve shared with him.

“No, I get that, I swear,” you rotate in his arms to face the others. “I appreciate all of you wanting to go and kick his ass. But I swear it’s not necessary. Felix already beat the shit out of him. His company put out a statement saying he’s taking a break for a bit for ‘health reasons’.”

All of you turn to Felix, who’s now taking off his headband, cool expression on his face. “I’m not against kicking his ass again, Jellybean.”

You stare at him dumbfounded until you burst into laughter because of course he wouldn’t. None of them would be. Because this is your family away from family. They’re dead set in wanting to protect you, and each other, from any and everything that could be harmful.

The others stare at you as if you’ve finally lost your mind which prompts you to just say, “I love you guys.”

Felix, besides Chan who is still holding you, is the first to step up and give you a very much needed hug. A little confused, the rest of the guys follow suit and you all end up in one massive hug.

Until one of the younger boys starts fighting with Changbin and they all break away.

“Don’t think this lets you off the hook for sneaking out of the dorm, Y/N-ah,” Chan says out loud from behind you as you’re still wrapped in his arms.

“You did what?!” Minho could be heard yelling, which causes you to groan.

© hippopotamusdreamer, est 2016. all rights reserved.

[foodsies4me]

The trainees protecting Magnus is now immortalised as one of my fav head cannons to ever exist. Mostly cause Magnus deserves to be loved and protected and pampered. He has been doing this for others for centuries and secondly he deserves it cause he is just amazing and beautiful soul.

Secondly I actually got so emotional at all the trainees banding together to give him hugs and bring him snacks. Magnus really went from single bachelor with no soul mark trying his is unloveable to the being loved by a handsome Shadowhunter and his clan of protective lil beans. I can only imagine the scene after when Malec are alone and Magnus just breaks down cause ‘fuck, I really am adored for more than my magic’. Cue protective and soft soulmate Alec and just all the emotional reassurance cuteness ☺️

You’re honestly amazing. Like never miss a beat, always on point in ways I could never imagine ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

As a (waaaaay too late) follow up to the Magnus getting hurt prompt and getting some trainees cuddles. (I am running so far behind on my prompts which I know all meant as prompts but they spark too many bunnies and then I want to write them.😂

Anyway here is the short follow up to that first prompt.💜

Magnus watches as the trainees walk out the door in pairs of two and threes. They’re all stalling, Hideaki “accidentally” forgetting five different pencils while Max forgets his socks, shoes and needs to pee before he runs out of excuses he can use. Clara is clinging to him, pouting and arguing with Alec that Magnus needs another Sad Pancake Day despite his injuries having entirely healed. 

Seeing the displeasure on their faces – the disappointed pouts that not even Aloysius and Ariadne manage to hide has something squeezing painfully in Magnus’ chest. Something warm and tender and painful, tearing and healing old wounds as Magnus struggles to keep his voice light and teasing.

Chairman Meow is pouting as well.

It’s not as visible as the crossed arms and downturned lips the trainees have adopted, but it’s visible in the way he’s swishing his tail and twining himself around the trainees’ legs, trying to stop them from leaving in a way Magnus doesn’t dare to.

“-okay Magnus?” Alexander’s voice pulls him out of his internal stewing. He’s looking at him, waiting for an answer. He has Clara and Steph hiked up on one arm while Leo and Barika are dangling from the other and he doesn’t even seem to notice it and the sight makes Magnus’ heart tighten again.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that darling.”

“I’ll see you tonight?” he repeats, rolling his eyes when the reminder Alexander will be back tonight causes another wave of protests.

“Now, now my darling beans – it’s only until Saturday. I’m sure you’ll all survive a few days without me there.”

“But we don’t want to,” Payton grouches this time around. “Can’t you just come live with us at the institute? And then Chairman Meow can come too and we don’t have to wait.”

“Alright, that’s enough out of all of you,” Alexander interrupts before anyone else manages to fit another word in. “We’re already late so say bye to Magnus so we can go home.”

The chorus of Fine’s that echo through his loft sound somehow even more unhappy and displeased than everything else the trainees have said before this point. They bid him goodbye with quick stolen hugs and promises to see him on Saturday before Magnus is alone again in his too-big and too-empty loft.

“Meow,” Chairman Meow complains when the door shuts behind Alexander, the sound high and whiny.

“I know, Chairman,” Magnus sighs, sitting down on his couch so Chairman Meow can climb onto his lap. His chest is still hurting, his heart overflowing with more emotions than he knows what to do with. “I know. I miss them too.”

If later that night he ends up with tears in his eyes when Alexander hands him the drawings and get-well cards the trainees made him, his heart too full of love and care, then that’s only between him, Alexander’s shirt and the privacy of his wards. 

[celestie0]

🪷 girl fuck these people I'm really sorry you're getting so many messages bitching about no smut in ch10. Like who even cares? Does a story or chapter have no value if the characters aren't going at it like rabbits and fucking and sucking on each other?

At this point if you're so disappointed about no hanky panky just go read one of those pornhwas where the characters start screwing at the drop of a hat.

I would've loved that chapter with smut or without smut idgaf it doesn't even matter to me (and the same is for most of your readers too, I'm sure of it). We've all stuck around with your work for so long, and we have faith in your direction as well as your decisions regarding the pace of the plot. It's never that serious, especially not to the stage that bozos feel the need to weep in a writer's asks and swamp them with negative messages. Go jack off or play dj with your hello kitty and go to sleep like the rest of us.

Again, no matter what you do with your work it's entirely your choice. Ofc we as readers can have our own takes and how or why we interact with the work can vary, but it shouldn't reach this stage. I've seen this same story of bullying and pestering authors on tumblr too many times with other authors whose work I enjoy, and many have left their blogs because the harassment made them lose interest in writing and sharing their pieces. It's fucking heartbreaking. Pornhub dot com is right there for y'all to be doing entirely too much in the asks of these writers who are already overwhelmed and write and share all this FOR FREE. If you have so many qualms about it pick up that bic and get to writing bitch!

I'm sorry babe take care! We love you🫂

AHHH LILYPAD ANON I APPRECIATE U SM THIS MEANS THE WORLD TO ME 😭😭 you’re always so kind to me i sobs

yeahh sigh :( i was just a bit upset that ppl were already finding fault w a chapter i haven’t even released yet just bc it doesn’t have smut in it 😭😭 like i obviously know by now that i can’t make everyone happy, but it’s not right to subtly pressure me into a certain direction for my story (ik this is a normal thing authors/writers have to deal with, i am just a weakling unfortunately 💀💀 my therapist wld agree)

i know it’s not most of my readers though :”) everyone is so sweet n kind n patient, i just don’t understand the some few that think that just bc they tell me they’re disappointed there’s no smut, that i’m somehow gonna go back to my 80pg dissertation of a chapter n make it 100pgs just to add some for them 😅…like no. what it DOES make me feel is icky n sad

frankly it’s really uncomfortable to make an author feel bad that there’s no explicit sexual content in a story 😅 your horny brainrot is showing. like, i AM def planning to write smut in kickoff, there will be multiple smut scenes to come. but even if i suddenly chose not to include them anymore, that’s my right to do so.

and yes, if they want smut, they can write it themselves. why do i need to be the one to write it for you? i don’t owe anyone anything.

i totally agree w you. honestly, i feel bad sometimes setting these boundaries, but you’re SO RIGHT in that SO many authors leave their platforms bc of hateful asks/pressuring comments etc, i’ve seen it time n time again. bc it’s true that it DOES get to people, especially when creating art is already a very stressful thing. i don’t have to passively tolerate rude strangers on the internet just because i’m trying to protect n pursue my passion

thanks sm for trusting my direction :”) and YES absolutely!! i love it when my readers disagree w character actions or emotions, bc characters have flaws n i’m intentional about those flaws, so it’s exciting to see opinions my readers have, even if they’re in disagreement, because it’s interactive w my work. not that i expect anyone to interact ever. i understand that i post on my own accord, so readers can choose whether to interact on their accord as well.

but something about pressuring me into writing explicit sexual content into a story that i’d like to think is a lot more than just smut, is really disheartening.

- ellie 🐸

[physalian]

How to Make Clean Romance Entertaining

@bananasugarwarrior ask and you shall receive

As an ace/arospec, I approach writing romance very differently than many authors and this is kind of my wish-fulfillment list more than anything.

Biggest detractor of implying anything in scenes you didn’t write: You don’t have those scenes to explore character development. I touched on this in What No One Tells You About Writing #6 and the problem I ran into a few times when writing ENNS and other works is that if you fade to black, you can’t continue important conversation or an exploration of boundaries, or fluffy new emotions, if they’d otherwise be in those missing scenes. Sex scenes are, unfortunately, prime real estate for some rich character development.

So you have to work all that rich character development around it. It’s up to you where you want to draw the line of “use your imagination” but everything up to the missing smut, and after, remains more prime real estate. You have loads of other options to explore clean intimacy and some I borrowed from this list that I reblogged about ways to show non-sexual intimacy between characters.

There’s more to a relationship to explore between your characters than just how good each other is in the bedroom. Here’s a few suggestions:

Tragic Backstory stuff and emotional boundaries

One teaching the other a niche or important skill to succeed/survive

A common physical threat, like monetary problems, job insecurity, sickness, or an actual challenge/quest/adventure/mission

A common emotional threat, like a lack of communication, or exercising an anxiety or phobia, or issues over speaking their minds

A common goal: Marriage, children, a new car or home, competing for joint acceptance into a team/group/club/prize competition

There’s also plenty for your love interests to think about their significant others aside from how sexy they are and how badly they want to get in their pants.

Introvert A can love how much B is an extrovert, or vice versa

A loves that B is good with animals, or children, the elderly, etc

A can love B’s skill and passion for their hobbies or a movement they believe in, or their stances on morality and the actions they take to back it up

A can love B’s skill as a teacher, their patience, kindness, and understanding

A can love B’s relationships with their friends and family, their maturity (or lack thereof), their work ethic

A can love B’s quirks and tics, like how they organize things or if they sing in the shower or how they dance when they’re listening to headphones

Point being:

And take this with a grain of biased salt because I’m ace and think sex is superfluous anyway: If you can’t write your characters in love with each other without sex, I won’t believe they’re in love with sex. Fiction, for me, that takes the narrative shortcut of “these two are the main couple of course they’re going to get together, I don’t have to do any work on writing why they’re in love you just came here for sex” annoy me, and quite a lot of other people, too, if the amount of gay ships that ignore the canon hetero couple are anything to go by.

The arc of their relationship doesn’t have to culminate in sex. Their arc should be specific to what these two characters want to achieve out of a romantic relationship. For a lot of people, that’s sex, but for others, maybe it’s just someone to cuddle on the couch with and watch movies, or someone they can finally trust and let in and be emotionally vulnerable with. Someone they can explore the town with, or travel, or take to dinner. Someone who doesn’t belittle them or laugh at them or disregard their interests.

Substitute relationship climaxes other than sex:

A finally trusts B with a secret they’ve been hiding for fear of ridicule, and B accepts them wholeheartedly (not Liar Revealed)

A and B finally perfect some routine they’ve been slaving over for months (like a dance or if they’re combat partners, a difficult maneuver)

A has been in love, but in doubt, and finally understands that B is The One when B is the only one to show up for A’s big speech/recital/presentation/gallery that no one else cares about

A has never let themselves be in love and it’s something wholly unspectacular that completely bowls them over with an epiphany

A is touch-averse and their biggest leap into physical intimacy is a huge hug, and B can’t be prouder of them

A and B narrowly survive some dangerous situation and have a serious realignment of priorities and newfound mad respect for each other

Actually, circling back to the whole “gay ships that ignore the canon hetero couple” thing:

This has been said before but if you’re looking for how to write a romantic relationship without sex, look no further than the male leads of many mainstream pieces of pop culture. Here, the presumption of romance isn’t built in, thus the writer has to actually put in effort to make these two characters like and respect each other, and give them things to talk about that isn’t just flirting. That’s what makes them feel more believable than the main man’s relationship with the cardboard lady lead.

[papabearbobbynash]

In a light note maybe not so light at the end it's such a win to have begged for years to get some Bobby lore and receive this. I mean, Bobby has been kind of a supporting role for years, his arcs mostly consisted of a supporting role or were around someone else. Since S1 I think it's the first time we see such prominent presence of Bobby's character in the show, where he has an arc actively in works each episode. This current arc is in the works since the cruise, can you believe it?

Honestly for someone who had lost hope on Bobby lore on FOX era, receiving something that instigate even more questions, but most importantly, something that added into the equation of many his scenes it makes sense and in fact makes certain scenes even more gut-wrenching or emotional? This is like i'm currently living on a dream until thursday episode hit me like tim hit his head on the table

[bigbadmuerte]

"It's not a game, I promise. In fact, it's all been rather disorienting to me," Philip rubs the back of his neck nervously, thinking back on the fire. "Your presence is a comfort to me though, Brother," he says, a small smile crossing his face as he meets Caleb's eyes again. "I know it must be difficult for you to be here from, you know...beyond, but I'm glad you are here. No one else in this place would understand what our lives have been like. I know you wouldn't abandon me and you've always been there before...but sometimes I..." he trails off for a moment, hands balling into fists. "I was just afraid she was going to take you away from me!" He exclaims, the emotion bursting out before he could rationally plan his words. "I know about you and Evelyn. And I know she comes from...somewhere else. Through that gateway. Caleb, I was afraid she was going to whisk you away to some other world and I'd never see you again. I never had anyone else. You were my only real friend, but you know that." He takes a breath, steadying himself, trying not to look at the hovering dagger but remain focused on his brother's face. "Learning of your death has made me look back on our relationship and there are some things I really think I should say even if they don't matter now that you're...you know. I know my approval doesn't matter and you've probably already lived a long, happy life with her, assuming she wasn't responsible," he gestures awkwardly to the dagger. "But, Caleb, you know a witch wouldn't exactly be my first choice, but my opinion doesn't matter so much either and if she made you happy and she was kind, that's really what matters. So I'm happy for you. I shouldn't have let my fear get in the way. Caleb, I'm sorry."

".... what..?"

Caleb's face goes blank, his jaw slack. That natural confidence he always holds falls off, shattered by a series of three words. Tears start to form in the corners of his eyes. He snaps to look at Death, pleading, who sighs and alights the flame in his hand further.

"Fine. Fine," he mumbles. "But I don't have the strength for this for very long."

When the fire grows, Caleb's form becomes more solid. Not quite opaque, but close. As soon as the change settles, Caleb rushes Phillip, tackling him in a tight hug that Phillip has not felt for hundreds of years. He starts sobbing the instance his brother is in his arms.

His tears don't quite feel damp.

"I thought I'd lost you! I thought I'd failed you, Illy!" He tries, unsuccessfully, to choke back the sobs. He just has to speak around them, face buried in Phillip's shoulder, hands knotted in his shirt. "I knew I shouldn't have left you, but I was so scared you'd hate me for loving Evelyn! I was a coward and it cost us everything! She kept telling me to tell you but instead I just ran because I was too scared of disappointing you!"

Caleb's whole body heaves as he cries. It's an odd sensation to experience, considering how still his chest is. "I just... I was so mad at you for so long for what happened...! It didn't feel fair, but then... I kept seeing how hurt you were, all the time, and you couldn't let any of it go... I just should've said something, anything...! But I didn't and it cost us so much...! I hurt you when I said I'd always be there for you and I can't undo that, no matter how much I wish I could..."

He presses his forehead further against Phillip. "I'm so sorry, Illy, for everything..."

[helpimstuckposting]

I’m a ghost and you are a shadow

Part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven

—

When they finally got around to leaving the backyard, once Steve had collected all the little bits of himself that felt tattered and stretched to their limits, he glanced back at his bedroom window. He caught the blinds swaying just a bit, as if someone had been peaking through and just stepped away. It was easy to imagine Eddie, pulling his mess of curly hair over his face to hide even though Steve hadn’t seen him. He wished he’d come back down.

Eddie was the only constant back in his world. He may have been states away, chasing some kind of purpose that Steve had lost among the bodies, but he called at least once a week. Just to say hi. Just to make sure they were both alive. Steve thought maybe he’d been so used to calling Wayne, he just didn’t know what to do without him. If Steve could be that filler in his life, that voice on the end of the line whenever Eddie reached for the phone out of habit, that was fine by him. It was the only thing he’d started to look forward to.

He wondered if his Eddie would be sad when no one picked up the phone this week. Steve felt a little like the small child hiding amongst the clothing racks again. He’s sure Eddie would notice. He’s just not sure if he’d care. Maybe he’d also send the nanny if he could.

Steve steeled his thoughts as they stepped back into the house, trailing slightly behind Robin as if that would delay the inevitable. She told him it was okay, that he could trust this different version of his mom but he wasn’t quite sure he could believe her. Maybe this Linda was different. That still didn’t make her his mother.

Back in the living room, Nancy, Max, El, and Dustin looked up when he entered. Dustin looked so apologetic that Steve almost felt bad for his reaction. He looked like he wanted to tell Steve sorry, that he didn’t mean to blurt that out, or that he didn’t mean to startle him but he couldn’t get the words out. Steve just nodded at him with a small reassuring smile and ruffled his hair as he passed, sitting back down on the couch with Robin.

They were back to the looking at each other thing, so Steve took pity on them and broke the silence.

“I'm okay, we can call her. Did you tell everyone else?” He asked.

Nancy shook her head. “We were waiting for you, we didn’t want to do anything behind your back.”

Steve nodded, heart squeezing tightly in his chest at the reminder that they cared enough to do that, to wait for him. He turned to the kids that were no longer kids, sitting together on the second couch, Dustin on the left and the two girls on the right.

“Still got the walkies?” He asked. Dustin nodded, pulling the two-way radio out of the bag at his feet.

“Always,” he replied.

“Are you ready?” Nancy asked, eyes caring and worried. She emphasized that it was okay if he wasn’t, if he wanted a few more moments to prepare for what was sure to be a stampede. Steve reassured her it was fine, that they’d have to say something eventually, and Robin squeezed his knee to offer her support, letting her hand rest there to keep him anchored to the spot.

“The rest of the boys should be in town. Will and Mike work at the arcade and Lucas is working at Family Video.”

Steve smiled, it seemed like they’d passed down their shitty strip mall jobs to the next generation. It was still so weird to know the kids were the same age he was when Starcourt opened, older than Robin was.

Dustin clicked the radio on and took one more glance at Steve before pressing the talk button.

“Mike, Will, Lucas, this is Dustin, do you copy?” He waited a few seconds, static coming through the other line. “I repeat, Mike, Will, Lucas, do you copy?” Another few seconds of pause. “We’ve got a 10-17, I repeat, a 10-17, do you copy?”

The line clicked in response. “Uh, what’s a 10-17 again?” Mikes voice filtered through the speaker.

“I think it’s a request for a pick up?” Will’s voice responded on the same line.

“That’s a 10-16, isn’t a 10-17 out of service? Why are you telling us you’re out of service? Over.”

The line clicked again, “That’s a 10-7, Mike,” Lucas’ voice responded. “Over,” he tacked on.

Dustin was clearly ready to vibrate out of his shoes in disappointment. The voices filtering through the static of the walkies made something fuzzy in Steve’s brain. The banter and the arguing and the crackling of the speakers, he could remember it like it was yesterday, like he hadn’t been missing it for four years. He was starting to get misty-eyed again and clutched onto Robin’s hand, still resting on his knee. She squeezed back.

“You’re all useless, it’s urgent business! I repeat, urgent business! Over!” Dustin yelled through the receiver.

Max rolled her eyes on the couch next to him and sunk back into the cushions, arms crossed. El followed her example, crossing her arms as well and relaxing into Max’s side.

“You don’t have to repeat everything, you know,” Mike answered back, tone snappy and impatient. The familiar sound of arcade games crackled out vaguely in the background and Steve could picture him leaning against the prize counter, rolling his eyes as he ignored some little kid in favor of answering Dustin.

“My shift is over in thirty minutes, how urgent are we talking?” Lucas responded.

“Uhhh,” Dustin glanced at Steve, eyes looking just this side of manic, “Try back from the dead urgent.”

“What?”

“Dead?”

“Who’s dead?”

“Who’s back?”

Dustin pressed the talk button to cut them all off again, “Just finish your shifts if you have to and meet back at Base Nora, he’s not going anywhere. Over and out.” Mike, Will, and Lucas tried calling out over each other, the line cutting in and out about ‘who’s not going anywhere?’ and ‘what are you talking about?’, but Dustin just clicked the walkie off instead of answering.

Max leaned forward again, arms still crossed against her chest, and looked at Dustin like he’d finally lost it. “That was the absolute worst way you could have handled that.”

“Yeah but how fast do you think they’ll get here now?” he responded. Steve shook his head as a smile pulled at the corner of his lips. He had to admit Dustin was clever. Rude as hell, but clever. Max just smirked back at him.

“Oh they are so fired.”

“I don’t think Keith can afford to fire them,” El laughed.

Keith, Family Video, the kids, it was all so similar to his world. If it was just this, just the party and Robin and Eddie, it would be fine. The fact that his house was Base Nora, that it was clearly well used by many people and filled with laughter and the sunlight of the morning peaking through the windows, it filled Steve with longing for what he’d lost in his world.

He couldn’t even remember the last time he’d opened the blinds in his house. It was always dark, quiet. He barely even turned the lights on most days, just fumbled through the house hungover and half blind. If it was just the kids they had to tell, he’d be excited to see their reaction, to know that everyone was safe.

However, with the conclusion of one task, the other much more daunting task was at hand. The lightness in Steve’s chest from the kids’ banter was slowly stripped thread by thread, unraveling the warmth he felt and replacing it with cold dread. Robin pulled him up and they all made their way back into the kitchen.

He glanced again at the picture wall, taking in the images he was too panicked to really see before. He stepped closer. There was a picture of the party at a beach, though Steve didn’t know where. He’d only ever seen beaches from expensive hotel windows, before his parents deemed him old enough to stay home alone. Here, the other Steve was smiling, arms around Eddie and Robin, who both had their hair up in buns, kids fighting in the background. There was another picture of the party in his living room, blankets strewn around the floor, kids huddled around with a movie on in the background. He couldn’t tell which movie, but the kids weren’t looking at the screen anyway, they were all huddled around laughing at he and Eddie, sleeping soundly splayed out on top of each other.

Steve wondered how much happier this Steve was. How much more he had. He did things, went places, surrounded by friends, always touching and talking and laughing. He had the party, all safe, he had his mom. But he’d died, left it all behind and Steve was in his place, taking that spot from him. It didn’t seem fair. Steve really didn’t belong here.

“Steve?” Robins voice called as softly as he’d ever heard her. He turned away from the pictures to where she was standing by the phone, already held in her hand. She tilted her head toward the dial on the wall, silently asking if he’d like to do the honors.

He shook his head but walked over to her, stepping in as close as he could. She wrapped an arm around his waist and held the phone to her ear, inexplicably dialing the Wheeler’s number. He glanced over at Nancy, leaning against the archway to the kitchen.

“Our moms have girls’ days sometimes. That’s where they all are now,” she whispered as Robin finished dialing. He could hear it ring. The phone anxiety was creeping back up on him, clawing at his throat. What if she’s mad they interrupted, what if she’s sad he’s not really her Steve, what if she doesn’t care, what if-

“Hi Karen, can I talk to Linda?” Robin’s voice cut through his spiral. He could hear Mrs Wheeler on the other end calling out for his mom, heard giggling in the background and wondered how many of their parents were there. Linda. Robin Buckley was on first name basis with his mother. The more things stay the same, the more they change or whatever the fuck that saying was.

“Hello? Robin?” His mothers voice called out through the speaker. Robin gripped his waist tighter, squeezing three times. He tapped her hand three times right back. It was okay. He’d be okay.

“Hi Linda. I uh… sorry to interrupt!” Robin responded.

“Oh, nonsense, is everything okay? You’re all there, right?” Her voice was so soft, so kind. The last time he’d heard the same voice it was cold, hard like stone. A frigid ‘We’re very disappointed in you, Steven’ tossed his way before his father threw down job applications on the kitchen table. He blinked back the memories and tried tuning back into Robin.

“-don’t really know how to explain it, we just… uh. It’s about Steve.”

It was silent on the other end of the line. The static counting down the seconds before his mother cleared her throat to respond.

“What about Steve, Dear?”

Robin turned to look at him, a vague panic in her eyes as she didn’t know how to respond. They probably should have thought this through more, figured out something to say before calling. It was too late now.

“Um… uh… Something… happened this morning and we think it’s, you know, campaign related,” Robin emphasized, as if she were adding a wink, wink onto the end of her sentence.

She continued, “There’s some, uh, gates we think have opened and someone’s stumbled back into our lives.” Steve felt her shrug helplessly, letting go of his waist to give Nancy a sort of ‘please help me, I’m drowning here’ look, gesturing frantically to the phone. She marched over to them and slid it out of Robin’s hand, stepping in between the two of them.

“Hi, Linda. We think you should come home and see for yourself. It’s a lot, so just… try not to freak out,” Nancy added. Robin smacked her hand to her forehead, that would definitely make someone freak out.

Steve didn’t hear the end of his mom’s call, just the whispered frantic arguing between Nancy and Robin. Eventually, though, Robin hung up the phone and they all looked at each other. At least that was over now. The actual explaining this though was going to be harder. Where did they even start? Everyone was going to flip out the second they saw him, and Steve was exhausted enough already. He couldn’t wait for this part to be over, he just wanted to rest.

This much energy, this many people and conversations and socialization wasn’t something he was used to anymore. It was a bit suffocating, but that could also have just been the panic. It would take about fifteen minutes to get here from the Wheeler’s house, same for the boys at the strip mall — though, Steve wasn’t sure if they’d finish out their shifts first or just make a break for it. They were never good at impulse control.

He decided to sit on the staircase at the entryway. He figured being right there would sort of rip the bandaid off, so to say. So, he sat on the cold hardwood steps, felt Robin plop herself down next to him, and he waited. The dark wood table against the wall of the entryway was the same in his world, though there was a vase of fresh flowers, recently filled. Alive. In his world, they were never real to begin with. Instead, there was a large vase of scented sticks, some minimalist bullshit decor that meant nothing. He stared at the flowers, outlined each and every one to keep his mind away from the panic, to keep himself rooted to the spot.

He used to sit here after saying stiff and formal goodbyes to his parents. He’d watch them leave, tell them have a safe trip, close the door behind them and then just… sit on the stairs. He’d sit for minutes or hours or whatever amount of time it took him to get over himself and get back on with his life. Who cared about some superficial woes of a rich boy? What was he going to say, that he missed parents he never really had? That he wanted his mommy? It was pathetic. So he’d dust himself off, though a spec of dust probably didn’t exist anywhere in the Harrington house, and call up Tommy and Carol to tell them he had the house to himself again. He could fill it with as many people as he wanted before they got back, he was fine.

Now, instead of shaking himself out of it, he was snapped back by the sound of high heels against the brick steps outside. He held his breath, or maybe he just forgot to breathe all together. Before the handle was touched, a stampede of sneaker noises caught up to the heals on the steps, the panting and gasped complaints bleeding through the door.

“Hi, Mrs Harrington,” he thought it was Will’s voice that filtered in.

“Hi, boys. I’m assuming you got a cryptic call as well?” She teased. She teased. He’d never heard that tone before in his life.

“Yeah, Dustin called right in the middle of our shifts!” Lucas accused, as if Dustin didn’t specifically tell them to finish their shifts before coming over.

“Aren’t you going to get in trouble for that?” She asked

“Oh please, Keith can’t afford to fire us anyway,” Mike muttered.

With the greetings out of the way, someone finally gripped the handle. The rattling of the metal put a fire under Steve’s ass and before he knew it, he’d booked it around the corner and just out of sight.

“Wait, Steve-,” Robin shouted after him, though the door finally opened and she was confronted with four startled faces before she could run after him.

“Steve?” Lucas shouted.

He muttered a quiet fuck under his breath and braced himself. He couldn’t just leave Robin floundering around by herself out there, that was too cruel. So, instead of being an absolute coward he took in a deep breath, held it for just a few seconds until his lungs felt stretched to their limits, and then he let it all go as he stepped around the corner.

—

Sorry about that one guys, I hate cliff hangers but I never know where else to stop these lmao you'll meet Linda Harrington in the next one! We'll also hear from Eddie 👀

I'm still adding to the taglist as well, so feel free to ask!

@weirdandabsurd42 @sirsnacksalot @space-invading-pigeon @aliea82 @goodolefashionedloverboi @emly03 @bestwifehaver @mentallyundone @13catastrophic-blues @estrellami-1 @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @likelylad @aellafreya @wxrmland

[virgothozul]

adfgfsgafsgvhhg 

[kaidanalenkosprmanager]

THE BEST OF THE NORMANDY SUMMIT

Featuring: Cmdr. Sophie Shepard, Primarch Adrien Victus, Dalatrass Linron, and Urdnot Wrex With: Comm. Specialist Samantha Traynor Commander, you need to keep Cerberus at bay- I can't overstate what a victory a treaty between the Turians and the Krogan would be for the Alliance. We need all the help we can get... Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)

[dragonsongmakhali]

between work ramping up and some family issues, I've got zero time for xiv or tumblr 😭 I miss the wonderful characters (and their lovely creators!) who live in my phone

[merriclo]

went to see the barbie movie a few days ago and hm. weird

[sapsolais]

i hate the movie theater bc i can't be autistic in there

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

I LOVE. WEIRD GROSS ALIEN POSSESSION.

[uwooyoungs]

kinnporsche finale just wrecked me i will be emotionally unavailable for the next 7 business days 💕