#I NEED TO HAVE THEIR FULL BACKSTORIES TO SET UP THE FIRST SESSION AND THESE LOSERS JUST WONT??? DO IT???

[suddenlymicah]

ugh i need to clean so much and i only have until tomorrow at 6:45 am (its 3:55 am rn and i have to clean up my entire room and plan about an hours worth of d&d for the characters to meet up for first session and they cant even fucking decide who is coming.)

[slavghoul]

Interview from Upset Magazine 6/2023

Words: Steven Loftin

Like an apparition manifesting within a dense fog, it was through radio static that Swedish rockers Ghost were formed. In the kindergarten he attended as a young boy, Tobias Forge found himself enamoured with the music crackling through the little toy speakers. From this point forward, he began picking apart the notes and melodies - his journey toward the lore and canon coming into focus as he sat, trying to figure out how this black magic could be summoned.

While it would be many years before he would don his garb as Papa Emeritus, the essence of what his future would sound like was being set through his exposure to a wide variety of music. If any proof were needed, just look to the impressive list of covers Ghost have put their ghastly mark upon, including 2016's 'Popestar' EP, which included the band's takes on Echo & The Bunnymen ('Nocturnal Me') and Simian Mobile Disco ('I Believe').

Ghost's latest EP is another covers bonanza. A five-piece offering of Tobias's backstory, 'Phantomime' plays out like a Greatest Hits radio playlist - a fitting throwback to Tobias' first dalliances with music. Of course, when a group more aligned to the metal/hard rock community bust out covers, including Genesis and Tina Turner, eyebrows are raised. To this reaction, Tobias scoffs. "In 1991, Genesis was one of the biggest bands on the planet! That was a huge hit. In the mid-80s, when I had an older teenage brother who rented every VHS movie that came out, of course, we saw the fucking Thunderdome, and that was a huge hit, and it's still being played on Swedish radio. It's an evergreen; it's not an eclectic choice at all," he declares. "I grew up listening to Stranglers because my brother liked them. What else do we have, Iron Maiden - I mean, are you kidding? I'm a metalhead!"

Originally conceived during the sessions for their fifth album, last year's 'Impera', there were two folders on his computer's desktop: one named 'Impera', the other simply 'Covers'. As the ideas for 'Impera' grew, Tobias would enter his usual routine of working on a cover or two. "At any point, when you lose a little wind in writing your own things, it's quite nice to say, 'Today let's go in and work on the covers'; you can choose anything you want, you can work on absolutely anything you want. And you don't have to finish it, you don't have to release it, you don't have to do anything, but just continue working."

He likens it to the freedom of being a theatre owner who, instead of trying to pen the next greatest Broadway phenomenon, opts to have a go at something already timeless and perfected.

"Maybe you're like, 'Okay, so this fall we're just going to do a reinterpretation of Hamlet instead, that's going to be fine, and that keeps everyone working, and that keeps a project moving along! And I find a similar thing with working on covers. So as I was writing "Impera', the covers folder was also growing exponentially and at a point. I had this idea that was going to be a full-length album."

With COVID restrictions meaning the original producer for 'Impera' was stuck in the US, Tobias had to source a replacement. It would be Klas Åhlund who stepped up to the plate. But, on one condition. "He was pretty upfront. He was like. Yeah, I only want to make the record; I don't want to work on covers," Tobias remembers "Fine, fine, fine, that's fine." he shrugs. "So, after the 'Impera' recording was done, I felt as if making a completely different, whole record again: I didn't have time for that. I didn't have the energy for that. But once I trimmed down the number of songs to only these five to make a very rocky record, it loosened up the screws a little bit for me in terms of like, "Okay, so now I know what the EP is going to be - it's going to be a full, full-throttle rock one."

Ditching some rumoured softer covers, including U2, Misfits, and Motörhead. 'Phantomime is instead a delectable slice of Ghost doing what Ghost do best: creating theatrically big rock. It's Tobias's mark upon some bonafide classics, including Iron Maiden's 'Phantom of the Opera' which feels as befitting to Ghost as it does seeing Papa Emeritus kick the bucket ready for his next iteration. While the focus was on creating this small dose of Tobias's musical DNA, it also served another purpose; to simply be "not very complicated." The project began with the mindset of "we can make this recording loosely - quick but stress-free - as opposed to making a record which is your hard fifth record that needs to live up to certain standards. So it was just a very inspired, very simple recording, actually."

After the complexities of 'Impera' which wound up requiring two studios simultaneously running in parallel "to be able to work efficiently" - Ghost was morphing into a taxing experience for the band leader, "It was just a bigger thing [and] way more stressful."

Deciding to strip that covers folder down to the five tracks, by all accounts, 'Phantomime was a measured and reserved effort. "It ended up being me, an engineer, and an occasional musician coming in and doing something. It was so much looser, so much more mentally Feng Shui," he smiles, relief glowing in his voice. "And I think that that reflected a little bit on the two different records. They're meant to be related - they are definitely related - they were made roughly in the same time, but they're completely different things."

'Phantomime' plays out like a ghoulish social commentary. Starting with a searing rendition of Televison's 'See No Evil, the journey traverses the scourge of Televangelism (Genesis' Jesus He Knows Me') with a delightfully-fitting NSFW video, the instant gratification humans require to feel (The Stranglers' Hanging Around"); the pull back into cruel reality (Phantom Of The Opera"), and the resulting undying hope from a degraded society (Tina Turner's 'We Don't Need Another Hero"). Each offering is bolstered with Ghost's dramatic, theatric rock licks and Tobias's powerhouse vocals.

With 'Phantomime' in the bag and the European leg of the 'Impera' tour imminent (Tobias is currently holed up in preparation), the idea of reflecting on how he came to go from a young boy listening to the static sounds of pop hits on the radio to orchestrating not only a feverishly adored band and its lore but finding the capacity to embrace his inner music nerd, couldn't be more timely. Tobias's relationship with music has always been one of intrigue. He's a pop songwriter with the ambition and ideas of a stadium rock band, which, in essence, explains perfectly why Ghost can sit in a unique, exponentially growing and expanding space.

"My earliest inclination of wanting to transform into something else was definitely Twisted Sister," he recalls. "You know, "I Want To Rock' and 'We're Not Going To Take It' - that was a huge record in 1984, and in 1984, I was three years old," he says. "My brother was 16, so everything that was going on pop-culturally amongst teenagers was happening in my home."

It was thanks to his brother that much of Tobias's relationship with music was formed. He's introduced him to various giants of the time, like tectonic plates being pushed around, impacting and shaping his musical landscape. Translating for young Tobias the attitude of punk at the time, as well as everything else that was 'in', he remembers, "When I was a kid, and he was supposed to babysit me, as a pacifier he would put me in front of [Sex Pistols mockumentary film] 'The Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle"," he laughs. "And then when that was over, he would just switch to [X-rated cartoon] Fritz the Cat. And I loved that stuff, of course. That was as much [about] the expression and the attitude. Of course, I loved the songs, but it was also filtered or combined with big songs for me." Those big songs ("Men At Work 'Down Under'," he initially cites, "those sort of songs still have a unique place in my in my writing") would eventually entwine with his darker side that he'd explore as he grew older. "Whilst my whole adolescence was completely in the name of extreme metal, I always had a very soft spot for Top 40 rock and pop radio always," Tobias explains. "And I've listened to that all my life. So it's almost equal portions of Venom as it is anything. that was on the radio."

Also, witnessing shock and glam-rock bands explode intrigued Tobias. He became swept away in the idea that not only could you push a boundary to its absolute limits with convictions and over-the-top grandiosity, but you could do so with songs that quantifiably bop. But, as time has gone onto prove, it wasn't pop music that enamoured Tobias enough that he wanted to become a pop star. It's the mythology and mystery that has become his calling card.

Tobias remained an enigma under the disguise of an evolving form of the iconic Papa Emeritus (now in his fourth incarnation) until 2017, after a lawsuit from a previous iteration of his backing band's rotating cast, the Nameless Ghouls. Visual and video components to releases are often hoovered up by the fandom, stripped apart for meaning and potential. Instagram posts are referred to as a '[Message From The Clergy]" (a phrase later claimed for 2022's Best Of playlist), and lest it is forgotten, the Ghost 'Grucifix' - the prominent crucifix deconstructed into Tobias's gothic 'G' logo - which ties together the vision, religious imagery and satire that would become a core part of the Ghost experience.

His musical ambition and education colliding in the middle of his Venn diagram between dark metal and pop magic is thanks to the likes of the aforementioned Twisted Sister and W.A.S.P., as well as his teen years in the black metal community. "Their first record was also a huge impact in Swedish media," Tobias remembers. "There was this big sort of Satanic panic thing going on at the time in the fall of 1984. Where you had essentially all those things happening. You had Mötley Crüe 'Shout At The Devil', which came out a year earlier, and they were there because they toured with Iron Maiden in 1984, so there was a lot of focus on these shock-rock bands. I saw that as a kid, and I was immediately blown away - it was the coolest thing I've ever seen. And I think that that was the trigger that made me identify as that is how I want to express myself."

Decoding the songs he'd hear also became an integral part of that expression. "That was the only thing I did for years before I started writing my own songs." Recalling his time in kindergarten, they had a piano and guitar, which Tobias became infatuated with. Instead of playing with the other children, he would find himself enraptured, listening to the radio or flipping over whichever cassette happened to be loaded at the time. He would then imitate the sounds he was soaking up. "A lot of those early beginnings of how to learn and how I've learned how to understand music filters through everything I do now," he explains.

The early records he'd find himself trying to unpack included KISS 'Alive' and Pink Floyd's 'Piper At The Gates Of Dawn' - disparate matches, but undoubtedly Ghost fuel with hard rock melodies and psychedelic tendencies. "I had the first and the second Pink Floyd on a double LP that was called 'A Nice Pair'. And that's the shit that I sat and listened to and played guitar to," he says proudly. "That's weird music, that's really weird chord sequences and melodies that sort of went nowhere. And, that coloured me a lot in my vision of this is how you write a pop song. Of course, I knew more conventional writing as well. But I figured that this resonates with me, and I want to write more like that."

Tobias is the first to admit that the influence his musical exposure has had on him isn't the most straightforward. "For all the years that I was in bands, up until Ghost, basically when I was in bands not doing well, I got a lot of, I wouldn't say stick, but it was always like, 'You write weird songs, there's something weird about them, and it will never really become anything because it has that sort of weirdness to it".

As he grew, the songs he'd heard reflected this inherent strangeness he'd constructed. Before the days of mass formulaic pop factories, the music emanating from the radio abided by the strictest rule of needing to at least be approachable, but within these confines, artists of the 70s and 80s would push the envelope as far as they could. Citing Nik Kershaw's 'The Riddle' as one example, "Holy shit, if you would have taken that song and taken it to a chord structure masterclass amongst pop writers now who want to write songs for Miley Cyrus or The Weeknd or any of that sort of level they would say, no, no, no, no, that this will never work. It's too strange. It's too weird. You can't do that; it doesn't have the normal chord progression.

"There are a lot of songs from the 80s that are like that," he reckons, "compared to the now, more informative way of writing, the 80s was braver actually, and it worked well. And those songs are evergreens in a way that a lot of the top radio shit from seven years ago is forgotten, and that's the stuff that I grew up with when I started playing the guitar."

Having made that inner sanctum, he would enter kindergarten a reality, one where he can explore those recesses of his mind shaken by the musical earthquakes he experienced; now, he's matured and deeply entrenched in the reality. "Throughout the modern day of pop writing, I know a few professional pop songwriters, and we continue having these conversations because in pop," he says, "where some of them work prolifically on really high releases, they're like, it's strange how the business wants everything to be so informative. Everybody wants a weird song, but still, all the big songs are usually very, very formatted [and] very, very simple."

While unpacking the songs he'd heard back in the 80s offered Tobias a chance to comprehend what makes a good song, it, more importantly, helped him to set out doing it on his own. When digging into crafting a new Ghost number, Tobias explains that "each new song is a little bit like virgin territory with its own riddle to be solved, and is always a combination of the horror of maybe not solving the puzzle, with the thrill when you do. And it's never easy because each new song needs something new. And so you constantly need to feed your ability with knowledge about how other things are."

Breaking it down into a figurative example, he likens it to being like a detective. "I'm assuming that part of being a great detective is to constantly have an open mind, but also constantly learning about human behaviour and wha people do. If you just had 100 forensic classes, but you know nothing about people and how they live their lives, it's gonna be hard to solve crimes." The same rings true for writers who have to read to improve and further understand language, while comedians pull from real-life experiences - music is no different. Tobias's early days of stripping down songs to their basic parts and then rebuilding them have remained a constant endeavour. "But that's how you write songs as well; you go and absorb new things."

The covers process, as mentioned, is a release for Tobias. When things are stuck when trying to piece together a new chapter for the Ghost bible, a cover offers up a chance for something lighter. "Working on covers can be equally euphoric," he confirms, "because it's fun to understand a song whereas, on the other hand, it can be almost demoralising because you're like, I can't believe that this song is so much better than anything that I've written! And it's so much easier. It's so simple."

"I find myself overcomplicating things often, but you might not hear the complicated detour that I took to end up at the more understandable, straighter version that ended up being the actual recording," he continues. "That's a never-ending struggle because that's how it's supposed to be. It's not like you write the one song. I don't think I know anyone or know of anyone who's content with the idea of having written one huge song. And then you know, okay, that's nirvana for you. You don't write the one song the same way that if you're a comedian, it's not like, 'Oh, I just told the funniest joke. So now I'm done".

While Tobias is one for wanting to keep the ball rolling and on a constant endeavour to continue his musical evolution, he knows there's a limit. Every release of Ghost must have a purpose. Nodding to the 60s method of firing singles out on all fronts, eventually compiling them for a full-length release, Tobias acknowledges his relationship with his fans is based on a more long-term understanding. "That's not how we do things; we make an album, and off of that album, there are singles - it's a 70s/80s thinking. And I don't want to refrain from that - I don't want too many singles to be these autonomous little creatures."

But the world is different now. It's a Wild West where being in the masses' consciousness is key, so things may have to change for him. Admitting that right now, he knows he's post-release of Ghost's last canon entry, 'Impera', which arrived back in 2022, and while 'Phantomime' is a reasonable enough bridge, sooner or later, he's going to have to play the game of ensuring Ghost ramp up. Earlier this year, Ghost collaborated with Def Leppard's Joe Elliott on a re-release of 'Impera' cut 'Spillways' which, while a fantastic addition to their arsenal, adds to the same notion Tobias is fearful of. "I'm slowly preparing for making a new record that's going to come out in 2024, which is way too long for the current contemporary music climate; you need to be ever-present," the last phrase hanging in the air ominously.

That doesn't mean he has to lower his standards, however. No Ghost release will exist just for content's sake. Everything must have its place. He even reckons a 14-track album is "a lot of music", and he still sees an album as being "22 minutes of music per side" - true to form, currently, no standard issue of any Ghost album breaches 12 tracks. He's even ready to aim for the likes of The Rolling Stones and The Beatles by swiftly lobbing a couple of spicy takes out. "Look, man, I don't even think that 'Exile on Main Street' is that good. Not even the fucking White album is that great - break it up! Both of those records would have been better if they were trimmed down to singular records."

That pop mind breaking through; Tobias is someone who knows that music is entertainment. Certainly, a medium which often leads to more bulky connotations, but it must entertain. It's why he doesn't pay any mind to those naysayers that yearn for Ghost to be more metal or to follow a different path. This is Tobias's game; we're just privy to the sermon. These days the floodgates are open and, when compared to previous decades, as Tobias remembers it, "you had to buy your own records. Whatever additional music you got, that wasn't maybe heard on the TV or the radio, when you took something from someone else, was usually a choice, so music styles could in some way be a little bit more insular back then just because you weren't subjected to as much." He mentions his beloved death metal as being a signifier of the changes happening. "Back in the day, when I was starting listening to extreme metal, that was completely embraced by a certain little subculture or group of mostly teenagers and 20-somethings. Whereas in the 2000s, when Vice started doing black metal reporting, all of a sudden you have indie personalities who were fans of Darkthrone, and so, obviously, what ended up that turned into this fusion, which was a positive and very natural thing."

This cultural shift is another reason Ghost's space is widening and its success growing. "Nowadays, people are a little bit more open," he admits. But, with this comes issues. "As time has progressed, metal and hard rock, as well as most genres that have been around for a while, [they've] gone from this youth culture to a conservative institution because so many of the fans are now aged." The passage of time waits for no one. But, more presciently for culture, it also means our understanding of what is 'good' and what should be where is moulded differently to when we were younger. "Unfortunately, that happens to most people regardless of who you were when you were 20," Tobias reckons, "or your ideals when you're like 40/50/60 years old. Your brain starts morphing into a slightly more conservative, slightly more nostalgic... You don't want things to change."

Tobias is the first to hold his hands up and admit the same has happened to him. He yearns for 1984 and even 1990-94. He would even be happy with 1987, back to those days with the crackling radio and a childlike spirit. "That would be so much cooler. I loved that way more than in this day and age. But I can't sit around and mope about that because it's not a problem that it's not 1987."

'Phantomime' is proof nostalgia can be a useful tool. It fuels with passion, and Ghost is Tobias's Neverland. "There's such a debate about what we are and why that is." Ghost are a band that, thanks to Tobias's musical education, transcend time. They exist on their own plain and with the evergreen, timeless sounds of yesteryear echoing around Tobias's head, long may Papa reign with his gloved melodic iron fist.

[popculturebuffet]

More Than Meets the Eye Retrospective: Shadowplay (Issues 9 through 11) (Patreon review for Brotoman.exe)

Hello all you happy autobots and welcome back to my look at more than meets the eye, long delayed due to a lot of scheduling delays, a draining move, and general shenanigans. But it's finally time for us to take a look at Shadowplay.

Shadowplay is easily one of the most important arcs of MTMTE, not only seting up a lot of character backstory, but also fully establishing Roberts vision of Cybertron past that he dabbled with back in Chaos Theory, a place where the senate is corrupt, the Decepticons are slowly planning a coup that will sadly turn from righteous rebellion into nightmarish dictatorship not unlike what they replaced, and functionism lingers in the background. And at the first time I read this arc..

While I liked it well enough, being a tense story that characterized Optimus well and gave him spotlight at a time when he wasn't in any of the comics on a regular basis, it still felt a bit like a neat side tangent.

I've come around since then for a number of reasons: The first is, especially on re-read this arc is REALLY good and in a continuity where Optimus didn't get to shine that often, it's another character piece that makes me sad he never joined the lost light. He got to lead but this really gets to who he is as a character and shows him at his best. It also has plenty of nice depths for the autobots featured, and seeing who they were pre-war really adds some layers and shows just what the war did to each and every one. The other is simple: I was reading the story for the first time. And sometimes something extraneous at the time ends up being important. In this case both how cybertron used to be is vital to the future of those who left it behind. So with that's lets do a little shadowplay and see how the past will ultimately nearly destroy the future...

Content Warning: Self Harm and Suicide Is Discussed

We open in pre war cybertron, some time after the last time we saw it in chaos theory. The Decpticon movement in in full swing, and two bots are discussing the recent clampdown, basically a bunch of curfews and othe rnonsense to try and fight back against them. But one of these bots, Nightbeat isn't remotely convinced this will work while his buddy Quark

Sadly not that one, is paranoid about it and assumes they'll force Alt Mode Changes when they get in power. While they'll do much worse, remember this idea. It'll be important next season. As will Nightbeat.

For now though Quark's casually day drinking is interupted by some blood.. from a corpse hung above

Cut to present day at Swerves where Ratchet joins a group consisting of Rewind, Chromedome, Tailgate, Whirl, Skids, Drift and of course the man himself. Swerve. As for why.... well as put in the page image THEIR GONNA FIX RUNGS BRAIN. After everyone gets a chance to react in shock and disgust and this stupid stupid joke , (Minus swerve who isn't shown reacting and likely helped Rewind set him up), we find out it's not AS obnoxious as it sounds: Swerve is still comotose and Rewind brought them all here to try and fix that on Chromedome's advice. See Domey's figured out why our Psychatrist pal's still in his coma: His body is starting to function but he can't fully heal till his mind does. Hence this exercise: The group gathered here isn't random as it seems: most were involved in a story in cybertron's past, the same one from the cold open, each crossing paths with a certain future robot space jesus. Rewind himself wasn't, but has both archival footage and has talked to some involved, so he can fill in the gaps. As for Tailgate and Swerve.. well Tailgate is just a nice guy and was likely let along so he can learn more autobot history, and Swerve owns the only place they could do this session nice and quiet, only needing a closed sign. (The bar has been reopened it turns out. ). And frankly it's swerve: you think he'd miss anything where he'd have a chance to talk and crack jokes?

So here's where we are: Nominus Prime, one of the senators, was nearly assainated and has vanished since while the corrupt senate we saw last time is only getting more and more strained as the citizens, paticuarlly the aformentioned decipticons, are pushing back more and more.

It's here the first of our familiar faces enters: Chromedome. Dome was working in Mechaforensics, even had a diffrent name but for clarity's sake Rewind is having him use his current one. He's working with Prowl

Who while not as awful as present, still has a rod wedged up someplace uncomfortable, possibly a cybertronian voltzwagon. The plan has all the hallmarks of a decipticon: i'ts pointed straight at the functionist council building, their graffiti is on the back. It's bad. we then get a nice diversion as Skids wants to know Prowl more, as he's going to be a recurring character and all and we get Swerve naturally hurling a ton of insults at the asshole and as for Rewind..

I love how Roberts not only embraced Prowl's tantrum becoming a meme, but decided to just make it a character trait. I also like how both of them can recognize the exact sound he makes It's then time for Drift's story.. which is good because Rodimus is getting antsy. At the time Drift was a drug addict, plugging boosters into his head. Ratchet makes sure to emphasis WINNERS DON'T USE DRUGS.. mostly because Tailgate's present. At any rate he gets hassled by two random dipshits... and stopped by Optimus, aka orion pax at the time, who then procedes to badassily take them both out in seconds. With Drift, known as roller then, comotose Optimus takes him to Ratchet... .. and then procedes to play with him by having the known atheist say adaptus be praised. The two wrestle a bit and Chromedome sidesteps this foreplay by pointing out this dosen't make sense: Apparently Ratchet was already cheif physician> Turns out though Ratchet was also unfufilled, so when Optimus, being optimus, suggested a secret center for addicts since the council , like most goverments, cares not one iota off a shit if people with a serious addiction die horribly, he gladly took it up. It also fits well with his character: Ratchet is older so of course he's already even further into his career, he likes helping and he likes a challenge.

Once he saves the future Drift, he encourages him to make something of his life.. while Drift plans to simply go to a refurbishment clinic and donate his body instead. The present day drift then has to go before Hot Rod tries to rebuke his amnesty.. and that's only half a joke as Drift geninely isn't sure if he can do that and isn't keane to find out. As for what the clinics were, Rewind helpfully explains for Tailgate, who nicely serves as an audience surrogate here. He even has a helpful ad

I also love the repacaging of something most older transformers fans like Roberts would be familiar with and fond of, the g1 manuals, into something fucked up, i.e. an add for cheap and nasty body tourisim. We don't know where it lead but we'll find out later. For now though once Drift leaves... Ratchet finds out there's bigger worries to deal with. Pax gestures to the news, something Ratchet dosen't like already for being state propoganda.. but likes even less finding out Nominus has offically been declared dead. More disturbingly Ratchet realizes their cause of death.. has to be wrong. It's said to be a rusted fuel pump, and the rust spreading to his spark casing.. but his fuel pump was pristine when Ratchet examined him post attack.. and with Optimus already theorizing to ratchet in a past conversation that the attack was a false flag attack from the senate itself Ratchet concludes not only is the senate behind this.. but they now have the matrix of leadership, all thanks to sentinel prime who no matter the reality is apparently just the biggest dick in existance.

Optimus reassures Ratchet he's not crazy or paranoid: they did clearly do this.. and he has a friend he wants him to meet

On that note we're back to Chromedome and Prowl. And we get another lovely toy based sight gag

Before the results tell prowl their going to Transluctna Heights next, the cybertronian beverley hills. Silciate Palm Trees and energon pools.

We then cut to Ratchet and Optimus who are meeting with the Senator, the same one from the end of Chaos Theory. This still works even if you had'nt read that story, as to me reading this comic the first time I assumed he and optimus had met previously and simply had a history.. and they do as seen with Chaos Theory he's the one who was convinced our hero could one day be a prime. Ratchet is mostly here to throw off suspiscion, since the senator already used most of his captial saving optimus from certain death at the end of chaos theory. That added context will be important in a bit but for now the Senator confirms that yup they killed Nominus for having a fake matrix. The only reason the senator isn't doing anything is because he's smarter than that and knows having a seat is way more useful than wringing Sentinels scrawny tickish neck. Speaking of which, The Senator is genuinely scared of what's going on. Also if you were curious where Megatron was during all of this he is alive, they simply have him on an asteroid mining as killing him would make him a martyr. His mining assignment is, once again, naturally important for later.. just not this storyline.

For this one we close the main story with Chromedome and Prowl investigating the swanky, richest of the rich only district of cybertron.. only to get a body thrown at them.

While we close the issue starting our b-plot for this three pater as we find out WHY Rodimus was so antsy for drift to get there NOW.

Yup... and honestly... this is the rare case where I genuinely DON'T know what happened here. We'll get an explination shortly and I THINK that's what indeed happened.. but I can't be sure for a number of reasons I don't want to spoil. The point is Red Alert's dead and Hot Rod thinks Cyclonus did it.

We see a lot of blurbs and what not on the news. The most important two are Senator Sherma, whose trying to pass a decipticon regestration act.. and if you've ever read x-men you'll know that's a pretty terrible idea and prejudice to boot, while we also get a hint against ratioisim, which I THINK is supposed to be some form of functionisim. For those wondering , Functionisim is basically determining your worth based on your alt mode and what purpose it serves. And if that idea sounds shady, racist and classist, you can see why the decipticons exist.

I also really like Roberts adding these shades to the decpticons existnace: Their still bad people mostly, but I love the idea they sprouted from a genuinely good place. From an opressed working class lorded over by a corrupt senate. It's an exploration of the idea a movement can easily be corrputed. YOu only have to look at say communisim: It's not a horrible idea on it's surface and modled right it can be done well.. and when molded wrong under someone like stalin it becomes an opressive facist state, just as democracy can be molded into one just the same when , as seen with the cybertronian senate, a few powerful folks wield said power regardless of the people's actions. As we've seen with Optimus , Nightbeat and Ratchet there are PLENTY of autobots who fully agree with their message.. they just won't agree with what that message becomes. It's one thing when the message is "take down the corrupt police state we all hate", it's another when the message becomes "Peace through tyranny"... a message really not that diffrent from the senate. The only diffrence.. is Megatron just comes out and admits he's going to rule over you as a dictator while the senate lies and says things are fair while constantly stacking the deck however they like. It makes me really wish Roberts had gotten to full on write the reboot when it happened, but alas, it wasn't meant to be.

Back with the cop plot, Chromedome is chasing around one of the perps on a flying bike. I wonder if you can play card games on it? For now the chase dosen't take much effort as the idiot he's chasing goes into a narrow garage.. that turns out ot be a no fly zone, complete with the cybertronian equilveant of saftey glass.. and being cybertronian that means anything speeding blows up real good. Prowl is already doing what he does best: casing the room and being mildly dimissive. Being an authortarian cockballon comes a little later but joining the police is a good start. That said we see how diffrent he was.. as he ACTUALLY APOLOGIZES

Yes when he finds out about the glass he genuinely apologizes and hopes Chromedome is okay. In the apartment they find both red alert and a decepticon manfesto and shrine. The senator was a secret deciptcion.. and given what else we know it's obvious the senate is trying to clean house of anyone that would oppose them.

Back in the present, Rodimus has turned Perciptor's lab into a makeshift inergation room. And it turns out.. he's taken in Cyclonus for no other reason than he's Decipticon adjacent. That's it. This is pure profling.. and it also provides a really intresting role reversal. Usually when these two talk Magnus is a stick in the mud doomsayer who follows regulations as his one true religion, while Rodimus, hot mess he may be, tends to give people chances and think outside the box. It's essentially a wackier version of Kirk and Spock.

Here though that same adherence to order and regulation that often makes Magnus the butt of the joke.. makes him the reasonable one for a change.

He does.. but only because Drift is unlawfly interogating him. Rodimus is just rashly assuming because decipticon, while Magnus rightly sees he's bungled this whole investigation by unlawfully arresting someone who did nothing wrong, they have no reason to bring in. Drift isn't much better as we see a nastier side to him. While he's a former decpitcon himself he treats Cyclonus hostile and subtly threatens him.. and gets driven into the table in response. While Magnus DOES hold Cyclonus back... if you look at the panel bellow he's not hurting him or anything. He's only holding him to prevent a fight that would only make this more of a farce. And Cyclonus speech makes it VERY clear how much of a farce this is and is honestly CHILLING with the recknoning in police we've been going through as what Rodders did.. is really what MOST police did and many still do

It's a damming speech and shows what Roberts has masterfully done so far and will continue to do: Show that the Autobots, while the good guys.. aren't flawless. We've seen it in how human they are and how goofy they can be... but we wee here the less endearing sides of their humanity, the judgmental side and tencndy to fly off the handle. Cyclonus also makes a valid point: they think winning the war makes them absolute victors.. but Cyclonus, while not impartial, is a mostly outside observer: he AGREES with the decipticon cause, but really isn't one. He can see the self righteousness and tendency to see themselves as absolute right the autobots are devleoping, something festering even worse back home, and he sees the same system that required the decipticons in the first place slowly reforming. And we've seen this cycle: the senate replaces a corrupt mad man, they become corrupt authorarians. MEgatron replaces them, he becomes a power mad dictator. While the autobots have a leg up on booth..there's no guarantee they can't fall just as hard or fast , and this book will more than prove that.

At anyr ate Cyclonus is absolved as First Aid thinks he has it.

Back at the crime scene, Chromedome and Prowl are backed against the wall. Prowl hasn't fought yet so he's scared shitless, Chromedome is enjoying that but it's not really helping the situation.. but someone arrives who does

If you ever find yourself wondering why optimus is in charge.. well it's mostly on the heart and sense of conviction, but if your wondering how he stayed in charge and stayed alive.. this is why.

Prowl then.. yells at Optimus, not only assuming he's a citzen but just being a dick. Optimus then flashes his badge and is disapointed what he heard about Prowl was exagerated. Yes even OPTIMUS FRIKKIN PRIME, PRE PRIME CANNOT STAND PROWL SOMETIMES. Optimus casualy says that Prowls report on all this will just get lost, and Prowl hopes "i'll never be as cynical as you orion pax"... bud.. your already.. so much worse.

Prime plans to follow up but he's wanted ON THE MOON... and I love a job where I get to say that. He's wanted at prison, as it's time for whirl to enter the story. Whirl also gets defnsive when ratchet rightly points out why he's arrested when he tries to blame optimus: He tried to murder a prisoner in his cell. The fact Megatron is evil later.. dosen't really justify it at all, as we saw. The senate were using him as a pawn to get away with worse stuff.

But the fact is by this point Whirl has realized the senate used him, and took away his hands, with a really crushing panel of him admitting why he's brought optimus here beyond REVENGE

They took everything he was from him and he can't do anything to them, as i'm sure many like him can't either. But he can tell optimus there's a plan for a large bombing, a false flag attack.. and to catch the Senator in the crossfire. We also see IMpactor getting introduced as Whirl's cellmate. Naturally for the wreckers there first meeting.. is impactor beating his head in.

One of my faviorite lines in the comic.

Anyways we get back to Prowl and Chromedome , and we get a really intresting bit: Chromedome can tell SOMETHING'S going to give and wonders if they'll survivie it, and while prowl denies it at first.. it turns out as much as he likes to bury his head in the sand at this point in his life, he hasn't buried it straight up his ass like his present day self.

Yeah I kick myself in hindsight for not only not noticing Chromedome and Rewind were a thing, but that PROWL and chromedome were in the past. I"m still shocked how oblivious I was, especially since I picked this one specifically because LIndsay Ellis had mentioned the idw transformers comics had gotten queer. I've gotten better at picking up on gay subtext, intentional or otherwise, but it's still hilariously tone deaf. It's also weird to see Prowl.. actually be romantic. Roberts does the legwork the other book simply dosen't seem to care to do in making Prowl a tragic figure: Sure he's absolutely the worst and Roberts makes no real attempts to prove that. If anything he shows the potetial was there.. but this arc really hammers in that Prowl before the war.. was a far better person. He still was entirley by the book, but he opened up to Chromedome, his partner in both senses, didn't want a war, and generally had good in him. I made a cop joke before.. but Dome IS trying to be good police. He belivies way too much in a corrupt system.. but contrast that to the Prowl we saw in issue 1 and will see again when the crossover comes: an authoratian nightmare who sees his boyfriend trying to get a measure of peace.. and sees it as a waste. Who sees the end of a years long war as just a lull in combat. Who in his own book is carrying out black ops bullshit and stoking tensions between autobots and decipticons. Prowl had the potetial to be what he is now always sure, but he wasn't etched in that. Becoming an autobot made somes lives better.. but for Prowl it just caused him to double down on his worse traits and become an outright monster.

The fight is also just.. sad. Instead of talking through their issue.s. rewind just snaps. He just can't face Rewind's history with Prowl or see that there WAS good in the man whose caused his partner such pain.. but also can't healthily cope with it. Then again as we'll learn heathily coping is not something Rewind's really EVER done.

Back with the plot , Prowl finds out to his fury that Flatfoot, his superior officer despite the name, has leaked his report, proving what Optimus said. Things only get more suspcious when they meet Trepan, the head of the clinic.. and after Chromedome sense ssomething shady, the sinister needle hands are a giveaway, Domey incapcitates the guy and our unambgiously gay duo find the insittute: tons of robtos removing brain moduls, rewiring... even before he became a mnemosurgeon, Domey was already intrested in the science and thus can recognize it. Trepan escapes but our heroes take their valuable intel to Optimus, who had Ratchet and some others round up the good senator from his school for gifted autobots.

Optimus puts all the pieces together while Prowl bitches in the background: Domey and PRowl found a list at the clinic, that turns out to be a list of decipticons regestered as a polictical party. Turns out while Senator Sherma wanted it to LOOK like decipticon attack.. but not blame them right away, getting more cons to register.. then inittating ANOTHER false flag to make it look like the deciptcons betrayed them. As for how.. the how is utterly horrifying: they plan to BLOW UP nominus' corpse with a fake rigged matrix. Optimus' only recourse? They ahve to steal it We're onto the final issue and naturally Prowl thinks this is madness, wants nothing to do with it and is a right asshole as he flees, telling him not to let DOme go on the mission

Dome went to gather some of the senators pupils. I.. .wasn't remotely joking about the x-men comparison: Since the functionists obviously are baffled and apalled by beings who have extra talents beyond their alt modes, the Senator has been shielding them in his building for gifted autobots and brought a few to help: Skids himself is a super learner, able to learn anything in record time, which seems useless until you realize this means he can pick up any skill as fast as the flash and retain it unlike said flash. The others are windcharger, who has telekensis Kyle and Gltich, whose design I like a lot and who can mess up machinery. So in otherwords, Progidy, Hellion and Shadowcat. Got it.

We then break for a second as Ratchet examines rung and Swerve brings some old fashioned nightmare fuel to the party, which this being the comic that it is, is entirely real and requires gloves. When Chromedome worries about this eating up their insides, Swerve reveals this isn't rewind's FIRST session. It's not even his second. It makes sense though: this is a complex prospect and it's not unlikely every autobot here met Optimus at some point.. nor that unlikely that it'd fall apart, hence attempt 3 here. We also get an intresting fact about Rung that will be VITALLY important way down the line

We return to the story to find out this is what likely broke the two up for good, as Prowl, being prowl, just left with no explanation. They still need a full plan but skids having a mini matrix on his face, a religious thing back then the comic dosen't go into gives Optimus an idea: He spends Domey to talk to our good buddy ironfist, pre horrible tragic death. Being a massive fanboy even back then, he's more than willing ot help in exchange for getting his life sized model of Delta Magnus

So now our hero have a fake to swap for the fake. Before they leave on the heist though Ratchet and Optimus' Friend Roller Roller Da

An old friend of Optimus' on the force we just meet here but , say it with me "WILL BE IMPORTANT LATER". This arc could've easily been called "TRUST ME ALL OF THIS HAS A PAYOFF. ALL. OF. THISSSSSSSS. " And it does. One benefit of having to go over these issues with a finer tooth comb than my usual lagomorph lenth attention span allows is I catch just HOW well crafted this story is.

Anyways Roller hacked the system and finds out there's some weird stuff about the guy, a few charges, as you'd expect.. but also the fact Optimus isn't the ONLY person he's been grooming for this roll. Optimus.. dosen't care. He's not naive, he gets the senator likely has backups, and is with the guy not because he's truly buying what the man's selling on "being the next prime" and all that.. but becauase he's a good man in a broken system whose trying his damndest to fix it. A bit creepy sure, but someone he trusts enough to do this. if he didn't they woudln't of gone this far.

We get back to the present.. and it's one of the most heartbreaking scenes in the comic so far. And you KNOW that's already saying something. We find out what happened to Red Alert.. and it was suicide. Granted i'm still not sure it was entirely suicide or if the very least he wasn't pushed further by the knowledge of what was going on and the pressure of his already bad paranoia being kicked into overdrive. I won't know till he comes back. It's handled incredibly well.. including the fact that even now Rodimus makes it about him.. but in a way that just.. punches you in the heart. Rodimus takes it personally, feeling that if one of his crew is suicidal.. he shoudl've noticed. But the sad truth with mental illness is sometimes.. someone is just suffering so bad till they break. As someone who has had suicidal throughts... sometimes you just keep those to yourself till your already on the edge of it. What's worse is while they DID save him... Magnus suggests not putting him back on line just yet. He's understandibly worried given all the trauma it'll just happen again and plans to revivie him whent he misions over or at the very least when they have the time to help him. The results.. are just.. pure pain

Normally when rodimus asks this, it's clear he just wants a second opinon that will likely agree with him.. but here it's very clear from what happens next.. he just DESPERATLEY wants any othe roption, anything but this... and ultimately it's best for red to take a nap till they can help him... rodimus left utterly destroyed. Just the pannleing here is perfect.. it's clear Rodimus feels he failed... and the failures will only add up as the journey goes on. For now though we're back to the finale of our main story: So naturally for a heist the place their breaking into, the Primal Basicla, is super well guarded: any plane that tries to fly by deactivates, pressure plates along the floor to alert the guards, and said guards are trigger happy monsters with the orders to "take alive """IF POSSIBLE""""" which is code for

Thankfully thanks to said no flyzone the top is unguarded so they simply get to work: Windcharger lowers them down, Glitch shuts off the force beams, at great personal pain, and Swerve uh... uses his grappling hook to lower optimus mission impossible style. Hey at least it's a vital job. Problem is the things rigged. WOrse problems are back at base. For reasons unknown, Optimus decided to honor Prowl's wishes and Chromedome was left on sercurity with Roller Roller Da. The Senator assumes Optimus was being paranoid.. when who would it be at the door but hired goons

Who just burned down The Senator's institute for gifted autobots. Back at the heist, Optimus calls on Ratchet, whose roll now becomes clear beyond "Map guy": He was Optimus' backup plan: since he can't disarm the locks he uses reverse psychology on ratchet telling him he coudln't POSSIBLY unlock it in time. Ratchet knows he' splaying him.. but he's wrong and Ratchet does. He almost drops the matrix.. but thankfully Windcharger got bored and uses his telekensisis kyle to lift ratchet back up.

With the heist a success Windcharger starts slowly taking them back.. but Optimus, being twitchy that Roller hasn't contacted him JUMPS OFF THE FREAKING SKY THING AND INTO THE STREETS FAR BELLOW to go after him. Good thing too as he gets there before they can murder the senator. Sadly.. there's no happy ending here. Prequel and all that. The hired goons hold Roller Hostage.. and the Senator being who he is, agrees to go peacefully. The goons TRY to leave a guy for optimus to fight.. but optimus still has the bomb of leadership, hurls it and the senate covers it up the same way they covered up the academy. Gas leak. the silent killer. What's worse is while Optimus and Domey head for the instutitute.. it's already cleaned out.. and Domey also has a horrifying realization about the name: it's called that.. so people THINK there's only one. As he explains in narration, there turned out ot be one under EVERY refurbishment clinic.

So with that... it's all over. For now. There's no real happy ending... in the past. in the present though as the defcon klaxons ring... RUNG SPEAKS. This whole plan worked. Back in the past though we get one final coda as some creepy assholes plan to do the oepration on the senator, a complete personality swap.. a turn to logic.. and iwth that we find out just who this guy is.. and it's one of the most chilling, brilliant and tearjerking moments in the entire comic

Yup one of the nicest bots in transformers.. becomes a cold murder machine who will soon, or likely sometime next year for our purposes, nearly destroy all of cybertron. Someone who might of created a better future as Cybertron's greatest hero.. has become it's greatest monster. My jaw dropped when I read this and now having read dark cybertorn and knowing how the other side of this story plays out for him overal.. it's just an utter gutpunch. Even when I wasn't a fan of this story, I LOVED this ending.

As for shadowplay itself.. it's excellent. It's still not relaly one of my faviorite arcs, as it's one of the heavier ones, but the heist in the third act is great, there's some nice backstory shading and like I said that final twist is fucking phenominal. I'ts a story that only gets better as you see every piece it sets up for the rest of the comic fall into place, and on reread the red alert subplot fucking broke me. It's a great story Next Time: .. is in september, as I was SUPPOSED to take the summer off to do Beetlemania, which is now too far ahead to not do, but mtmte returns in september for an annual as Magnus takes the spotlight and a lot of stuff sure does happen. Thanks for reading.

[sanguivor]

Okay. I can't take it any longer. I NEED to ask you to tell us more about Velthryn, if you'd like to just. Dump anything about her, her backstory, campaign, art, what she looks like, whatever. I wanna KNOW.

I am so incredibly happy for this ask because Velthryn is my pride and joy, she's the best thing I've ever done, and she breaks my heart.

she's my very first d&d character and I played her for over three years in a campaign with my friends, we finished it last year actually and I'm still thinking about it. everything about the campaign was homebrewed, from the setting to the lore and the history of the people that live there, and it's so incredibly rich and detailed it's incredibly impressive considering that was the first time my friend dmed anything, so the story and the plot are entirely him but everything Velthryn was like the weirdest love letter between the two of us. I'm so incredibly proud of how her personal story played out.

I've talked a bit about her before (I have a tag for our campaign here) but never went into detail because I managed to keep her backstory a secret for THREE YEARS for plot reasons so this is the first time I'm going in depth about her like this I'm excited.

Velthryn is an assassin rogue moon elf from the far north, a land constantly blanketed in snow and ice even in the summer months, and under near constant night for most of the year. she's specifically from the Black Cathedral (Astaeran in Mavel'en, the archaic language moon elves speak) which is one of only two places inhabited in the far north, the other being the city Leirion, and both are inhabited solely by moon elves - the rest of the continent is separated by mountains, superstition, and sometimes the moon elves blades.

the Black Cathedral is a cult where generations of moon elves are raised in isolation to make offerings and prayers in blood for the Night Father so he might usher in what moon elves call the eventide, endless night and sleep not just for them but everything and everyone. a gentle end of the world. Velthryn was one of five moon elves called Nightdaughters, who are chosen every half a century to bring death to what the Cathedral call the five fated to die on the continent. just before the start of the campaign she and her sisters (Maevan, Ylaria, Helle, Honoria) found the first of the five; a farmer and his children still asleep in the early hours of the morning, and their deaths were not gentle. Velthryn, raised with the belief that death was a gentle mercy, could not reconcile the bloodlust she shared with her sisters so she did what no Nightdaughter should ever do or has ever done. She fled, and by sheer luck or fate ended in the company of the three others who should have been her sworn enemies but ended up being her greatest and only friends.

knowing full well a Nightdaughter who abandons her pilgrimage and her sisters should take her own life or be hunted by her sisters Velthryn stayed with what became our d&d party not because she thought the Cathedral was wrong but because she thought she could fix what she and her sisters had done. She was going to give a proper end to the five fated to die, give a proper prayer to the Night Father.

and for the next three real life years I got to figure out how Velthryn would navigate a strange world without the safety and familiarity of her sisters and their pilgrimage, how she would come to terms with the knowledge everything her Cathedral taught her was a lie, from the pilgrimage's purpose to the very existence of her gods, I got to make the heartbreaking decision in session where she sacrifices herself in place of one of the five fated to die in an attempt to save them and to atone for leaving her sisters, her pilgrimage, her god and her belief, only to come back from the gentle peace of death by the very god she died for who wanted more from her. she watched and felt most of her sisters die, dealt the killing blow for Maevan, she and Ylaria spared one another but went their separate ways, and Velthryn returned to the Cathedral alone. the campaign ended with Velthryn realizing the only mercy she could give the Night Father was the gentle peace of death, and as his last Nightdaughter she was the one who held the blade that brought the end to the old gods, whether they are or ever were gods no longer mattering.

she also once did 144 points of damage in a single attack. I LOVE assassin rogues <3

she's incredibly quiet and soft spoken, a good liar not because she's charismatic (the opposite actually) but because her expression is as unchanging as ice, she's intimately familiar with death and killing but she's not cruel, does not abide needless suffering. the first time she spilled blood on solid ground free of snow she slipped on it. she killed an oni single handed in two turns of combat (my dm is STILL mad at me) before anyone else had a turn. she's so unnerving she spooks horses just by being near them, and she hates them for being foolish and clumsy. she's so unused to sweets she thinks they're gross. she has a passive perception of 24, absolutely nothing got the drop on her. she's a rogue but she can't pick locks or pickpocket to save her life. her party had a paladin and a cleric and she was somehow the most devout of all of them. her fave colour is purple because of the purple in the arctic lights. she's my babygirl she's a murderer she's my everything <3

visually I've always had Vel compared to a ghost, piercing white eyes and hair with unnaturally pale skin in constant contrast to the black garb gifted to Nightdaughter's and her uncanny ability to disappear (+17 stealth by the end of the campaign lmao) she's often likened to a specter in appearance and thematically throughout the campaign. she was fully supposed to die but post campaign she's replaced the previous Elders of the Cathedral who she and the party killed in revenge for what happened to her and her sisters, it's the only time she was never merciful in her killing, and with centuries ahead of her she means to ensure the old gods rest is not disturbed.

I have a tag for her: x

two playlists: x + x

and a pinterest board: x

also a tag for her complicated love and rivalry with maevan: x

and a playlist for them too: x

there are so many different things about her I haven't even touched on, like the fact she and Maevan took the places of the fourth and fifth meant for sacrifice, but soooo much of the lore and campaign plot ties into the other party members and those aren't my stories to tell (though feel free to ask @mismageus about Áine, the little sun elf cleric who's saved Velthryn's life in more ways than one I know she'd love to talk about her)

anyway thank you soooo much for the ask I love talking about Velthryn <3

[motheatenscarf]

Almenor D&D went very well tonight and was intensely fun and memorable, the whole party managed to kill a god and we're not even at endgame yet.

So much backstory, but the shortest version is thus;

Our DM has established that some of the gods are mortals who used HORRIFYING fanes of immense and profane power to ascend to godhood, essentially merging themselves with the natural divine power of a concept given form. These gods are generally more powerful and less changeable than the naturally occurring ones who shift with mortal expectations and belief, and they also hate each other and have vendettas against one another. One of these bad dudes is a mortal once named Istaphon who merged with the concept of Corruption/Ruin and has been manipulating the Sun Goddess, the Sun Pope, the Sun Religion, and now there's a big war between the gods that's spiraling out of control onto the material plane causing untold destruction and their followers are deciding now's the time to be crazed zealots about it. I mean, they were before, but now even moreso to the tune of a full on siege and straight up plagues of Egypt type shit going on.

Notably, there is no gate or bulwark or veil or ANYTHING that can physically separate the gods from the material plane in this setting; they can come down whenever they want. The only thing that was ever stopping them was mutually assured destruction and the threat of the Material Plane's destruction meaning no more followers meaning no more power. The ascended mortal gods don't have to worry about that as much though, and ever since the Sun Goddess took her own life rather than allow Istaphon's corruption to reach her, her Pantheon and church started getting more paranoid and zealous, and her divine sidekick god, described as an archangel, went BERSERK in her absence and apparently had a semi-mortal daughter, whom we... y'know, killed, because she was full on Spanish Inquisition evil, so he went insane and tried to kill us, and then the divine balif god showed up to try and drag the archangel home, but he got ganked, and then the archangel's equivalent in hell went, oh sweet, no cops to stop me now! And then archangel killed HER before our lich god came to stop him, and then every other god went, fuck it, everyone else is doing it, and now there's a godswar, and we're in it, and it's... insane.

So, we're trying to pick up the pieces where we can, and currently in this session the Sun Pope was leading a siege against the city we'd JUST freed from the Sun Emperor (who was the husband of the archangel's lunatic daughter whom we murdered, so he's not happy with us either) and was vowing to make us pay for our apostacy. We brought the Orcish god of ass kicking, Sun Pope called down the god of Civilization, they duked it out in a field while we fought off hordes of angels and pitted straight up dragons against each other.

We're level 18, insane shit is happening!

We're only fighting HERE instead of being at any of the other like, FORTY places that are about this awful, because the Sun Pope has an artifact we need to forge a godkilling weapon designed by our lich-god buddy named Bel-Katash, whom we call B-Kats, because 1.) we have to break the fanes that turned these mortals into gods in the first place so no more can be made and also so that they can't be used to summon the WORST of the asshole gods, an ancient primordial being of chaos who takes on the form of a dragon, a reinvented Tiamat, and 2.) it would actually be great to have something to threaten these assholes with so they stop fucking up our material plane! We should maybe kill the gods, actually!

Anyway, B-Kats only designed this weapon because he was a mortal himself once, but he made a baaad deal with, essentially Istaphon, out of desperation to escape execution at the hands of his enslavers. B-Kats isn't a GOOD dude, he only ascended to godhood by snorting the souls of his empire of descendants like a line of coke after a thousand years of lichdom to gain enough power to kill the previous god of undeath and steal his job, but he isn't the WORST dude because at least all he wants is never to be a slave again with no one holding power over him or his soul. He doesn't want the world to be plunged into perpetual chaos and he has no interest in the petty wars raged by the other gods so... fine, we'll work with that!

Back to the present, we manage to finally punch a hole in the Sun Pope's defenses and incapacitate her in like 2 rounds with some of our hardest hitting tricks, and she calls upon her angelic guide to help her. And he answers!

Except her angelic guide is Istaphon, who wants to brag about his evil plan and thank her for starting his mission of ruin so thoroughly. Then he casts a plague on all of us because he also means ruin and corruption in the form of DISEASE and PESTILENCE, so that's fun! We've all got like maybe 10 rounds at most before this plague kills us if we run, and we have maybe ONE round before he obliterates us if we stay; what are we gonna do?

We all say fuck it, hail mary, go down swinging!

Sorcerer starts it off by using her 9th level spell slot to cast Wish and try to break the strands of weave stitching Istaphon to Ruin. She makes some STUPID high save to succeed and then another so as not to die immediately. She succeeds on both, but is knocked down to 0 hp and has her strength reduced from trying to control THIS much magic around, y'know, RUIN HIMSELF. My Warlock sees this and is close enough that he can try some insane bullshit, making a grab for the successfully untethered essence of Ruin and casting Plane Shift to banish it to the depths of the Abyss where Tiamat is still trapped. The hit lands, the thing is banished, but my boy fails his Con save and instantly dies from, y'know, Plane Shift being a melee spell and having to PHYSICALLY TOUCH the IMMATERIAL CONCEPT OF RUIN in order to banish it from the Material Plane.

With Istaphon momentarily weakened, our Cleric casts HIS hail mary and casts Gate, trying to call forth Bel-Katash so he can have his revenge. Bel-Katash comes through and is like, HELL YEAH, and restrains Istaphon, freeing up our Rogue to grab the artifact off the Sun Pope's rotting body and assemble the final piece of the blade before landing a fucking crit and shattering him on impact, the blow rupruting out and killing basically everything below a certain HP threshold in like a mile radius and instantly killing our unconscious Sorcerer and almost killing our Cleric and Rogue, who are still plague stricken and fucked up.

Bel-Katash says good job, I know you still need that blade to finish destroying the fanes, but that blade is a loaner and I'll be coming back for it. Ominous shit, but COOL, thanks, we'll burn that bridge when we get to it, I guess.

Cleric now only has like 3 rounds before he dies, and our DM just asks what he does. Thirty seconds of panicked spell scrolling and spell slot availability checking later, he can, in order, cleanse our Rogue, revive me and our Sorcerer, and then DIES, with like... one level 2 spell slot left and nothing else. Sorcerer and I wake up just in time to see him gurgling on his own diseased blood as our Rogue begins to panic because he thinks he's the only survivor. Rest in-

Just kidding, Death Ward kicks in and he's at 1 hit point! Fuck yeah, Clerics!

We head back to our headquarters in the recently liberated palace over a mile long march of corpses and we are all FUCKED UP with several levels of exhaustion and over the trek realize that my boy has a withered and nonfunctional main hand that he can barely cast spells with and is definitely cursed as fuck, but we did it!!... for now.

There is... so much else to do, but we assembled the god killing blade and it is OPEN SEASON NOW, BABY! Curses be damned!

It was a very cool moment where everyone got to show off and do what they do best, and it was very fun. I'm still super hype about it and this was like 4 hours ago. My Warlock is definitely getting a new fucked up looking cursed arm out of this and GOD, I wish I wasn't broke from Christmas shopping, I want to commission art of this new look so badly, my poor Warlock boy is like if Tyr were a stringbean nerd, sacrificing his arm to delay the fuckin wolf time and give the world time to prepare.

[miloscat]

[Review] The Lord of the Rings: The Third Age (GCN)

I’ve been sent back, until my task is done.

So I took some time off from my quest to play Lord of the Rings games. Quite some time, in fact. But no matter. Previously, I’d wrapped up the movie-based tie-ins and was ready to start on sidestories. So, after EA Redwood Shores (later known as Visceral Games) finished the Return of the King game, they started on a game ostensibly called LotR Trilogy, teased at the end of the former. I don’t know if this is what they were planning it to be all along, but the name at least changed.

I’ve heard people call this a Final Fantasy X clone. I can't really speak to that, but it’s certainly a turn-based RPG with one of those initiative queue systems. Progression is streamlined: some areas have branching paths but many are straight corridors, the skill trees are simple, there’s no shops and no currency. The traversable zones seem like little more than set dressing until the next drawn-out battle. These are mostly prescribed (most areas have no random encounters) and give predetermined loot. You’ll be spending a lot of time in the menu between battles fiddling with stat numbers and equipping the new drops (they’re cosmetically reflected on the characters which is nice).

If it sounds a bit railroaded, well it is. Or you could view it as one of those miniature trains in a model village, a pleasant ride to see some sights. I do recommend turning on Easy mode in the options, as it will reduce the amount of time you’ll spend watching those belaboured battle animations. (Note that I tried to play this on my Xbox but the disc was too damaged and failed after my first session, so I continued using Dolphin; the blessed speed-up feature saved me figuratively millions of years.)

There is some freedom with your character builds and your choice of party. I chose three of the six available (Idrial, Morwen, and Berethor) and used them as much as I could, and got by just fine. There’s a mechanic where you gain skill points in one of your two ability fields for each time you use an action of that type in battle. This incentivises using your skills—and they are useful—to learn more of them. I literally never used the ordinary attack! The game throws restoratives at you and you’ll frequently level up for full heals too, plus the save points replenish you. OK, so I was on Easy but the way I see it the harder difficulties were just wasting my time, and there was some challenge later on anyway.

Anyway, as an RPG it’s fine, but how is its use of the licence? Well, it feels quite fanfictiony, for better or worse. The story plays it safe by following a B-team Fellowship, closely shadowing the actual Fellowship and cleaning up after them, and almost all the six party member are expies of other characters, at least on the surface. Berethor is a Boromir type, although you find out later that he was secretly brainwashed by Saruman... and also Sauron I think? He’s a paladin type with excellent party-wide buffs. Idrial is just Arwen in the Fords of Bruinen scene, has sword but mainly healing and magic. Elegost is Strider-like, a Dunedain ranged attacker and debuffer. Hadhod is a Gimli-esque dwarf, a tank with some defensive and fire spells. Later you find Eaoden aka Éomer-lite, a Rohirrim knight with some technical buff skills, and Morwen. She’s a bit similar to Éowyn but the most original, a woman of Rohan with a tragic past and a need for vengeance who fights with double axes and thievery skills.

There’s some developments with these folks, aided by cutscenes with new narration by Sir Ian over movie footage, lending some authority while bridging the narrative to the films’ events... and the events and backstories of the game and its characters. You see, it’s told in a disjointed way, and supposed twists are just tossed off, so it ends up feeling a bit half-arsed. There’s even an unnecessary forced love triangle. It doesn’t help that several of the actors seem to be Americans faking British accents, and the voiceover recording in general could have used a pronunciation coach, but this has frequently been a problem in the movie games with their proper nouns.

It is fun getting something of an original story in this world, but it sticks very closely to the movie events for most of the time, unlike the later and more ambitious War in the North. The new characters are fun but heavily retreading known archetypes. You do get a ridiculous climax by fighting the Eye of Sauron at the summit of Barad-dûr: this is the fun kind of nonsense the game could have leaned into more, and even it seems thrown in at the last minute with no lead-in at all. There’s apparently a co-op mode but it is separated from the main game in some way, and the touted “Evil Mode” where you play as the baddies is a minor side-event that’s just a series of battles. Basically I just wish this game had gone harder and more out-there, but it’s a fun fluffy bit of fanservice all the same.

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

been seeing too much positivity in this fandom so i'm here to spread bad vibes

what's ur least favorite episode and why is it episode 3 the gentleman pirate i'll go first:

goes the hardest with secondhand embarrassment as a source of humor. the first 3 episodes in general do this, but this episode is absolutely The Worst. lucius's little speech in spanish jackie's makes me want to die. someone wrote rlly good meta abt how they stop using secondhand embarrassment for laughs once ed shows up, which is true and is great, but ed doesn't show up until the very end of this episode so we have like 20 minutes of laughing at stede to get through.

on a similar note, this episode teeters a little too close to beating a dead horse re: stede being a shitty pirate. like we've had two full episodes of him bumbling around like an idiot and i'm ready to move on. we know blackbeard is coming soon and that's where my investment lies; i don't rlly need to see stede flailing around in the republic of pirates to know stede is completely inept. i got the point last episode, thanks. Where Is Taika.

compared to the rest of the show this episode feels aimless and i think it's because the characters are kinda aimless. like, it feels like the first session of a new dungeons and dragons campaign and the DM doesn't have the full storyline planned so you're just running around doing random shit until something sticks. i think the main reason for the directionless vibe is that all the other episodes have ed and/or stede (aka the Protagonists of the show) going through some sort of emotional change or mini-character arc as the real core of the episode and i started listing them but realized that's insane so i made a different post for that. things happen to the characters and the characters do stuff, but there's not any change or growth.

overall this episode mostly just sets up things that are important later (spanish jackie, jim's backstory, izzy and stede's animosity), but the payoff doesn't come until later in the season, so on its own a lot of this episode doesn't stand out. the only payoff in this episode is ed showing up at the end which is GREAT but like it's the last thirty seconds. i have a whole episode to get to before then

and not 2 b like "this show is problematic!" (but like nothing's perfect yknow, it's important consume media critically) (and like this is kinda done intentionally and played for comedy) but stede in the republic of pirates gives me poverty tourism vibes. like i know that's the POINT but god it's so frustrating. i've already made a post abt how i want him to get called out for shit like this so i'm not gonna get into it here but like. rich white man walking through poor slums full of people vomiting and dying and being like "i'm so at home!" "lucius sketch my picture next to this corpse!" is not rlly that funny to me. personally.

i've been forcing my family to watch the show and after this episode my mom said she found this episode boring. that's right folks my mommy agrees w me. so there.

anywayyyyyy there are a lot of things abt this episode i DO like (jim being jim, ed saving the day, "genital pirate") and it's a very important episode for the show as a whole. but when im rewatching the show i spend most of this episode on my phone lol

[witchoftrinity]

1 from basics, 2 from OCs !

Munday Questions

Do you tell your friends / family that you write?

Half my friends are also writers writers/rp people too so its a boon to my sanity when I don't need to explain how out of pocket my muse choices are. As for my family well...yeah I haven't lmao.

They do know I do DND stuff so realistically it shouldn't be too hard to explain this as well. It'd be more trying to tell them the muses I do and not sound like a lunatic.

Who was your first OC?

its been so long I wouldn't even know. Beyond DND characters there's definitely around 2 dozen characters just lost to time that I wrote down concepts for and never really expanded upon.

I think the first real one I developed significantly was a Fate Master that I still use relatively often to this day. She wasn't anything special, really most of it was just other character traits that I cut off and slapped onto her but that's what we all did way back when. Nowadays I actually have a coherent idea of who they are and not some hobbled mess but goddamn their FC changed a few hundred times and really shows how my tastes went.

I'm talking like Deadman Wonderland to Tokyo ESP to Otherside Picnic to whatever is on my mind today. If you ask how it got to that point I LITERALLY would not be able to tell you it just happened. But she's someone I sat down and wrote out a backstory and all that jazz. Nowadays there's stuff like XIV where I can shove most of my energy and call it a day. But past Allul was crazy don't screw with them.

How do you create an OC? What are your steps for developing an OC?

I'm very sorry that this part is long but really its just me rambling with my bad opinions especially as someone who does canons a lot more nowadays. Anyway...

"Just do it. Within reason." - Allul 2k24

This is like 30% a shitpost but also like 70% serious. I feel too many people get hung up on handling everything at once rather then taking it one step at a time. Your mind (especially someone like myself who goes full ADHD constantly) just can't work that way delegating everything to where it needs to go. Then you lose motivation, do nothing, all the above and nothing ever gets done. At least that's how I've noticed my mind goes.

Basically my mindset goes

1. Jot down the idea for a character or group of them. 2. Ruminate over how/what they might do in said setting. Main goal smack dab in the middle. 3. What forces/motivations are helping them reach that goal? Friends? Foes forcing their hand? Outside forces beyond our comprehension? Those are the circles around that middle goal. 4. Other ideas, potentially characters that are intertwined with them, etc.

So Teacher Allul is in session and four an example like this I'll do a certain someone that reared their head here for awhile. Ofc I feel DND works off different rules because you are (usually) at the DM's mercy but that doesn't mean you can't have a compelling OC.

For Asuna "Step 2" I really wanted to try and push the whole "sheltered royalty wants to find out about the real world" vibe but not make it basically her defining character purpose. "Step 3's" forces that influenced her was...well her actually dying and coming back as a ghost on top of the world ending threat that the campaign had. The people she met along the way and getting closure with those intertwined with her own past helped motivate her IC to keep pushing to finally get some that ending she wanted and still open the book for more adventures down the road.

For your own characters just existing in their own universes or other canonverses you definitely have more breathing room since you can fill them into the blanks or have something in the story influence them. It helps ease your mind and connects the goals much easier then your own mind. But ofc YMMV and most importantly, you should have fun! If something isn't seeming right look at it later and find out what you aren't enjoying. it's your character and you can do whatever the hell you want.

[missspringthyme]

January 23rd, 2024

Another thesis meeting today that I was NOT late for. Fuck yeah! Small improvements!! In fact, I was early!! This meant that I had to stand awkwardly outside my supervisor's office because he was in a meeting, but hey at least he saw that I was early. I'm also doing a fantastic job at putting together some very cute business casual outfits, absolutely love playing professional dress up and I finally feel like I'm finding a style that makes me look put together but not like a little kid wearing their parent's clothes.

I got to see the EEG lab for the first time today, and when I was in there my supervisor mentioned that if we wanted to observe on a high-density session that we could do so. I put a reminder in my calendar so that I could ask him to sit in on a session at a reasonable time. Otherwise, I would absolutely forget.

It took a while to get things set up in the lab because nothing was working (ha, gotta love academia) but testing is done in this sound proof booth. There's a camera inside so you can sit outside the booth and observe or give directions, but for this study we will sit inside with the participant. While the door was open I kept looking at the screen that showed the live feed from inside the booth, because it meant I could see myself fully from the back. It's wild how rare it is to see yourself in ways that are normal for others. I'm already such a slut for mirrors, but oh boy was that a trap. I kept reminding myself to look away so that my supervisor and the greek girl wouldn't notice how entranced I was.

When I used to act, they have to take a recording of the silence in a room for editing, and that means a room full of people barely even daring to breathe while a guy stands very seriously with a boom. I wonder who was the first person to realize that they needed the silence from a specific room during sound editing, it must've seemed a bit odd to do the first silent room recording. Anyway, one movie that I did we took a silence recording right before a scene where I was going to be asleep in a bed while "my mom" had this big emotional moment and sobbed next to me. So we were all in the bed, and I was doing my best not to rustle the sheets or squeak the mattress, but I vividly remember this moment because it was the first time I realized how heavy and uncomfortable true silence can be. The recording felt like it stretched seconds into years and all I wanted to do was have it end. To yell or clap or whatever other noise that would cut through this thick jello. Being in the sound booth is like that, but at least with the experiment running or people talking it goes away. I got to try the mobile eeg on, which was fun, and then we got sent home with them to mess around and figure them out.

We had dnd that night, so I put it on former Italian roommate and third culture Australian and let them look at their brain waves. Of course, they didn't really know what they were looking at, but I just kept saying "That's you! That's what you are. A collection of electrical signals!".

DND went well, they liked the backstories and spent 1 hour of real time with the halfling shop keeps I created called Pimmy and Pizzy. German American's boyfriend was visiting so I offered to have him control authentic australian's inner demon. This resulted in him losing most of his money and acquiring all the bullshit items at Pimmy and Pizzy's stand. He and German American also immediately wanted to risk it all with the deck of many things, and neither of them pulled very well. I think I'll have to implement more opportunities to gamble in the future. French girl is leaving to go back to Paris soon, so I'm trying to make her last few in person sessions as fun as possible. Although I really thought they would get further in the campaign than they did this session. C'est la vie.

[pablice]

I Ate Boiled Eggs for Breakfast and Lost 20 Pounds in a Month - My Weight Loss Story

The Backstory of My Journey I had a major wake up call that made me realize I had to make a lifestyle change to become healthy. For years, I had been eating processed and fried food with very little nutrition or fiber. I had an unhealthy relationship with food and I was feeling unmotivated and lethargic. It was time for a change. My first step was to start researching how to create a healthier lifestyle. I read about the benefits of diet and exercise, and I decided this was the best path for me. I wanted a diet plan that I could stick to long-term, and I decided to create my own tailored plan focusing on whole foods. I made sure to be realistic and focus on making sustainable changes. My Diet Plan and Exercise Regimen To achieve my weight loss goal, I planned regular shorter exercise sessions with cardio, strength and core training throughout the day. For instance, my exercise regimen included one hour of walking, fifteen minutes of sprints and an hour of core and strength training thrice a week. Additionally, I invested in a jump rope which enabled me to incorporate this easy and efficient exercise into my daily schedule. When it came to my diet, I decided to follow a low-carb and high-fiber plan. I made several swaps like quitting processed foods and replacing them with fresh fruits and vegetables. I also incorporated lean proteins, nuts, and dairy into my diet while avoiding fried and sugary foods. This plan helped me to feel nourished and full while curbing my cravings. The Results: 20 Pounds in One Month At the end of the one month, I was surprised and ecstatic to see that I had succeeded in my goal. After carefully tracking my daily food intake and exercise, I was delighted to find that I had lost 20 pounds, halfway to my ultimate goal. This motivated me to continue following the path that resulted in 20 pounds of weight loss. I found a new sense of energy and determination. I had identified the key points which allowed for my success and strived to build off them over the next few months. I could not believe how quickly I was able to change my habits and I was excited to see what other accomplishments I could achieve. Adjustments I Made to Ensure Long-Term Success In order to ensure long-term success with my weight-loss journey, I had to make some lifestyle adjustments. One of the first and most necessary changes I made was to create a set schedule for eating and exercising. This allowed me to hold myself accountable and make a plan that I could follow consistently. I also incorporated mindful eating practices, such as taking my time to savor each bite and listening to my body when I began to feel full. The second adjustment I made was to emphasize the importance of quality over quantity. I aimed to eat nutritious foods that were full of important vitamins and minerals, which helped me to feel satisfied with less food. I also made sure that any type of activity that I chose to do was something that I actually enjoyed, making it easier to stay motivated and continue toward my weight-loss goal. How Boiled Eggs Fitted Into My Diet Plan I decided to incorporate boiled eggs into my diet plan because they're a fantastic source of lean protein. They offer essential vitamins and minerals, such as iron, and provide a balance of healthy fats. Boiled eggs are a convenient option when I'm on the go and need to grab a snack. I also enjoy the versatility of being able to add boiled eggs to soups, salads, omelets, and sandwiches. Having boiled eggs for breakfast or as a snack gave me much needed energy. They can also help with weight control—a boiled egg contains seventy-five calories, and it's full of protein, which helps to provide satiety and keep hunger at bay. Boiled eggs are also easy to stick with as part of a meal plan since they can easily be prepared. It was convenient for me to boil eggs in large batches and store them for quick and easy meals. Tips for Making Boiled Eggs Tasty and Nutritious One easy way to make boiled eggs tastier is to add a bit of extra flavor. You can easily add extra flavor by sprinkling them with herbs and spices. Try adding some garlic powder, salt, pepper, oregano or Thyme. This adds a delicious flavor to the boiled eggs that can make them even more enjoyable to eat. You can also make boiled eggs more nutritious by adding other nutritious ingredients. You can add a few slices of tomato, a few slices of bell pepper or some spinach leaves. This adds important vitamins and minerals to the egg, making it a healthier option. You could also try adding a teaspoon of olive oil for added benefits. Managing Challenges Along the Way The journey of healthy eating and regular exercise wasn't a smooth one. I faced many obstacles to staying on track, from my willpower weakens caused by cravings for unhealthy snacks, to days that I was too busy or tired to exercise. I dealt with these setbacks by routine consistent changes. Instead of giving up entirely, I set smaller, achievable goals and addressed the root of the challenge. For example, when I was tired, I would spend 10 minutes stretching or doing yoga instead of skipping exercise altogether. I also allowed myself small daily treats like dark chocolate to stave off cravings for unhealthy snacks. These strategies helped me stay on track, even when the going got tough. Possible Health Benefits of Eating Boiled Eggs Eating boiled eggs can offer a number of benefits for health. One of the biggest benefits of boiled eggs is that they can provide a great source of protein. Protein is essential for muscles, organs and other body tissues, helping us to stay strong and healthy. Additionally, boiled eggs contain essential vitamins and minerals such as iron, zinc, folate and vitamins A, B12, D and E. Further, eggs are low in calories, so they can help you to reach your desired weight and maintain it. Boiled eggs are also a great source of healthy fats, which have been linked to many health benefits, such as improved heart health and lower cholesterol levels. With all of these benefits, boiled eggs are an ideal way to add something healthy and nutritious to your diet. What is the backstory of your journey? I was always overweight and unhealthy, until one day, I made the decision to start taking my health seriously. I decided to create a diet and exercise plan that was tailored to my needs and that I could stick with over the long-term. Through careful planning and diligence, I was able to achieve my goal of losing 20 pounds in one month. What diet plan and exercise regimen did you follow? My diet plan consisted primarily of whole foods such as fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins. I also implemented a calorie counting system to ensure I was consuming the right amount of food in order to meet my weight-loss goals. As for my exercise regimen, I committed to doing a minimum of 30 minutes of exercise five days a week. What adjustments did you make to ensure long-term success? I made a few key adjustments to my diet and exercise plan to ensure my long-term success. I made sure to include a variety of nutrient-dense foods to keep my energy levels up and to ensure my body was getting the vitamins and minerals it needed. I also varied my workout routine so I wouldn't get bored and would continue to challenge myself. How did boiled eggs fit into your diet plan? Boiled eggs were a great option to include in my diet plan as they are incredibly nutritious and low in calories. I would usually eat boiled eggs for breakfast along with some other nutrient-dense foods. What tips do you have for making boiled eggs tasty and nutritious? To make boiled eggs both tasty and nutritious, I recommend adding herbs and spices such as garlic powder, onion powder, oregano, and paprika. You can also add other healthy toppings such as diced tomatoes, avocado, and some feta cheese. What challenges did you face along the way? One of the biggest challenges I faced was staying motivated and committed to my diet and exercise plan. I found it helpful to set daily and weekly goals and to reward myself for reaching them. I also made sure to have a support system in place to help me stay on track when times were tough. What are the possible health benefits of eating boiled eggs? Eating boiled eggs can provide numerous health benefits, including improved heart health, increased weight loss, increased muscle mass, enhanced brain function, and improved eye health. They are also rich in nutrients such as protein, vitamins Read the full article

[d4rkde4thangel]

Fox’s Universe

So I decided that I am having way to much fun with this ranting into the void format so I will continue by describing the overall world that our cast inhabits.

To lay some groundwork we our located on Earth, this needs to be specified due to aliens existing and my character is one of them, currently in the campaign it is 2022 due to weird scheduling shit. The first session took place, in universe, in 2020 and Covid did not happen. The key things to know about Earth in the campaign are as follows: The Meta Gene- Think of this like the X-Gene from X-Men or the Meta Gene form DC and you get the picture. Basically every 1 in 100,000 people have this gene giving them SUPER POWERS! It is important to set this up due to this leading to the founding of... The I.B.M.A- Standing for the International Bureau of Metahuman Affairs. Whilst there were/ are other agencies similar to the I.B.M.A. it is arguably the most important. For most of the campaign our group was working for/ with the I.B.M.A. until its recent disbanding. Before they disbanded they were kind of shady assholes but assholes with authority that inspired many of the villains of our world including some P.C. villains. To sum up the I.B.M.A. would either hire metas or lock them up with basically no trial and after they got shut down things have gotten a little more hectic recently. Universal Vessels- Basically the universe has six (I think? Fox will let me know.) fundamental forces that make up the Mask’s universe and each force has a designated vessel to contain excess energy and enact their force’s will. I will describe each force and their vessel in posts designated for each force. The Zela Ray- This is where I am forced to describe a bit of Tilia’s backstory. Hailing from the planet Androlus the Zela Ray are a militaristic terrorist group that wished to liberate the oppressed lower cities of Androlus. An unfortunate side effect of this is now they have a bit of a might makes right type mentality and have a thing for purging their weak. Oh and yeah they are actively on their way to Earth. In order to help everyone understand how scary they are all Anlans, Anlans being short for my characters species, can shapeshift and have telepathic capabilities. This without mentioning Anlan technology.  Other then those key things there are of course other various groups of interest with varying power levels. Most recently the group to watch out for that I will close with is...

THE CRIMSON YOKAI!-  These are a relatively recent faction but one with wide reaching influence and some powerful fucking members. From what our, non-dickhead, P.C.s have gathered it is mostly run and managed by Percy Green. Yeah... so if you read the main post you may remember Percy and that I called him an asshole... this is why. Even though, technically, Percy is not the official leader he does most of the organizational stuff. This is why the Yokai is so dangerous by the way. Due to a P.C. going full villain this group has the brain power of a PLAYER CHARACTER. Normally that would make the group fucking useless but Percy has BIG BRAIN! OH, and if that wasn’t enough Percy is one of those fucking vessels I talked about earlier, specifically the vessel for ,what I call the bullshit force, Cosmic. Basically so far the Yokai has publicly destroyed every Meta Human Regulation Agency and key Government buildings across the world. To the point that a literal impending alien invasion is our group’s secondary concern. With all of that out of the way I think this post should help bring some of the over all world into focus for everybody. Oh one last thing the Multiverse is real in our campaign and I will not even fucking touch upon that anymore then I have. Thank you for indulging me even if you wish you hadn’t.

[unordinarytales]

Adventuring Spotlight: Wages in Vice

I finished running my first published adventure late last month; the Wages of Vice from Journey through the Radiant Citadel written by T.K. Johnson. In the past, I had been skeptical of published adventures as I was worried about integrating them into a current campaign and it felt like "cheating" in terms of adventure prep. I always took pride in creating my own worlds (the current incarnation is Feyruin; a collaborative world created by our game group) and writing my own stories (and we know what they say about pride).

However, when Wizards of the Coast released Journeys through the Radiant Citadel I loved the concept, and I picked it up on launch day. My first campaign in our shared world ended over the summer and then we had the game search project though we had space in our schedule amid the winter holiday schedule toss-up.

Since we have a collaborative world, I had been tentative to read the full book as I didn't want to spoil adventures that others might run. After negotiation with the group, I picked Wages of Vice as it matched the needed level, and this spotlight article from Polygon made the adventure sound fantastic:

Your heroes arrive in the city of Zinda, and it’s a festive atmosphere. It’s time for the March of Vice, a Carnival-like celebration where revelers sweep their sins and vices into the sea. It’s loud and colorful. There’s street food and rides and a huge Mardi Gras-style parade. And then they trip over a dead body.

I normally am a Lazy DM and thought it best to read through the adventure to get a sense of the full story and pacing. After that first reading I was hooked; the adventure immediately grabbed my brain and made me excited to run the story. I decided to set the location within our shared world rather than include the Radiant Citadel and nestled the setting into Feyruin. Then I took the characters from the prior campaign and rolled the adventure premise into their backstory making a nice holiday special style-adventure.

The adventure is great. After a brief introduction to the mini-setting, the author lays out the encounters with narrative threads to drive the story. The encounters include combat and social elements with call-outs for major non-player characters and mechanics for story elements [1]. After the adventure conclusion, there is a gazetteer that provides more information on the mini-setting and includes other adventure hooks for exploring the setting.

I completed the adventure in 3-sessions and it went well. My fears and pride were squashed outright.

I was able to add the adventure into the world and modify the hook to mesh well with the character.

I was able to make the adventure my own by modifying the NPC motivations and the backstories. And I could not have come up with as vibrant an adventure on my own without the framework.

The only issue I had with the adventure was my own. The character had a small NPC entourage (the group traveling about trying to garner support for a rebellion, which is what brought them into the adventure). I had trouble working with them during the encounters, and juggling them with the player to scale the combat encounters properly.

Another issue(s) I had was pacing the encounters and making sure I had the threads straight between the different sessions. We managed though I think more experience DMing will make this an easier skill. I want 2023 to be a year where I run more games and I am trying to look at DMing as art; it is never perfect and I will always be growing.

There are no stat blocks given in the book and instead the author refers to the Monstrous Manual to provide that information ↩︎

[clockworklozenges]

So, a good five or so years back, I played in one of the best worst DnD games I have ever been in. The DM had bought the Libris Mortis book, which, if you were unaware, was a 3.5 splatbook adding in a lot of undead stuff, including some monsters and undead player races and stuff. Wanting to try it out, me and my gaming group decided to play things from it, our then DM deciding to run a completely homebrewed session. This proved to be a...

Terrible Idea™

(for the uninitiated, never homebrew something you do not fully understand unless it's just cosmetic. If you want to make all elves worship the god of garlic bread, Ultimo-Metatron-Omega, go ahead, but unless you know how the game works, don't make mechanical changes). So we all picked stuff from the books-one player played a skeleton Sorcerer who in life was a tribal shaman, but an attempt at healing went wrong, turning him undead as his life energy was replaced with negative energy, explaining why most of his spells were necromancy and suchlike.

Another player played Krug, an antipaladin in very spiky full plate. He was a zombie made by a necromancer of a paladin who was fighting him, but his allies killed his would-be master before he could assert control, and not wanting to just off him, his allies just...yeeted his body into a portal and hoped it'd re-kill him. It did not kill him hard enough. It did, however, explain his stats which...oof. He had already got debuffs to some stats due to being a zombie, and rolled abysmally. Fortunately for the player, he played mostly to socialise, so didn't much care.

I played... Count Nox Feratu, the Campire. As in, a vampire with a very camp German accent, which I did not break for the whole time I was playing him. To the point where "ach, nein, I haf bin heet! Heal me, meine freunde!" was par for the course. My overly camp vamp was a wizard, but due to level adjustment was a bit of a shoddy one. For backstory, he'd been ousted from his clan for ineptitude, and had sworn revenge. I was going for a swordmage build but never got there. All his spells were utility or just necromancy spells.

Our last player played...sigh...Damien Bloodmoon, cleric of Nerull, God of murder and undeath. He was one of the clerics from the book's murder Domain, meaning that he got buffs to damage. He was a vicious arse both in character and out of it, and was so dripping with edge compared to the paladin with the same IQ as a horse after its trip to the glue factory, the shaman who thought killing fixed people and the Campire that if you gave him a pat on the back you'd have finely diced your hand into a red mist. Not going too outlandish with his backstory of wanting to dominate the world as his undead thralls, Damien F***ing Bloodmoon had only taken spells which either charmed live people, dealt negative energy damage or messed with ability drain and suchlike, which he used with aplomb on townsfolk on our way to our objective. He was also, importantly, playing an elf of some sort, I forget which kind. Meaning that of the party, only one was alive.

So, just as an aside, for those of you that haven't played 3.5e DnD or have only played 5e, in Libris Mortis, undeath was gone over in detail, and had a litany of pros and cons. For one thing, undead had only the HP they had-folks like Damien F***ing Bloodmoon could be 'dying', and had some time to be stabilised before meeting the reckoning of Papa John and dying proper. Undead did not, it was just how much you had and if you ran out, poof, you're dust, bones and fertiliser again. You were also harmed by positive energy, so healing spells hurt you, as did potions of healing. However, undead were kind of hardy - poison immunity, some had resistance to non-magical melee damage, stuff that drained your ability scores and levels didn't work on them, some crits wouldn't do extra damage, and the best part- negative energy healed undead. Meaning all the spells our party had which damaged others like the living Damien Bloodmoon were curative ones for us. Keep this in mind.

So, we began our quest, learning of a necromancer a nearby town was plagued by. After using our skills (to whit: Damien Bloodmoon charming and drawing the life force out of random villagers and the only potion seller in the town whilst we went shopping. Krug got a snazzy hat, which we put on top of his helmet, and we chatted to townsfolk as I looked alive enough to pass as human and the shaman had a fake beard and toupee that people were too awkward to point out was fake so went along with it) we learn that the necromancer has a base of operations in the cemetery. "Oh ja, zo original, dahlink. Ve vill need to educate zis guy on vhat is chic and vhat is just shabby!"

So we head there and the nightmare begins. Damien Leads the charge, using all of his knowledge to deduce that the shambling horde moving towards us were stronger-than-your-average-bear undead, and he was right. These were powerful armoured zombie mages of some sort, casting ability draining spells, negative energy ray spells and even having auras of negative energy that dealt damage on a failed Fortitude save. Even their punch and quarterstaves did negative energy damage as well as the usual bludgeoning or unarmed. However...only one of us was really in danger and the DM's face fell when the squishy casters walked up and began shanking their super-special homebrew zombie wizards, being healed by the damage of their attacks as we cut them down.

Like I said, one of the benefits of undeath is that negative energy actually heals you. So the strikes of the magic staves and punches that hit us did some basic damage. Which was then immediately healed by the negative energy their weapon strikes and spells were doing.

However, you'll recall that Damien Bloodmoon was an elf. And not dead. Being a Cleric of a death god doesn't mean that you have the abilities of an undead. That meant that even with the DM being merciful, by the end of the first fight he was covered in blood, mud and withered away to just above half his original strength and constitution. More were patrolling, so we had to run. But that posed a problem.

Remember Krug had heavy armour? And recall his awful stats? He in fact, hadn't got enough strength to wear the armour he'd been given for backstory. He didn't, according to the DM, have enough to remove his own armour. And we attempted to, but also failed our checks according to the DM. And Damien Bloodmoon refused to help, simply blaming Krug and his player. Krug's player thought it was hilarious, and Krug only had enough Intelligence and Wisdom to say his own name, so saw no problem. And Krug, Nox Feratu and Shaman realised that there really...wasn't a problem.

For us, at least.

We slogged through three combats dragging Krug and wading through the mud with him. His speed was so slow that for every step he took, we took about ten. The DM was confused and infuriated that his encounters weren't working, but refused to change them. So we had fun role-playing. Or at least three of us did.

Damien Bloodmoon refused to roleplay, and none of his ranged spells could affect the zombie mages. When he went into melee, he came out wounded as all hell. He went down twice, and it was only the healing supplies of the shaman that saved him.

All the while, he was... Let's say not best pleased. Damien Bloodmoon was getting increasingly wounded, exasperated and longing for the sweet embrace of death as reprieve from the humiliation. His player was getting increasingly redder and rage-filled as time passed. Each fight ended with our characters stronger than ever and his a bloody pulp on the floor, with poor in-character knowledge (and terrible rolls) preventing him from realising why.

Eventually, we reached the final boss, pausing only to paint Krug's armour in contact poison just in case, and to find a stick to help the now-partially-crippled Damien Bloodmoon, cleric of death and murder, walk after being beaten up by angry zombie wizards for hours. And it had, indeed, been hours. Among us, only Damien had a bonus to strength, and we had two swords, a mace and a staff between the four of us. Meaning it was re-death by a thousand cuts for the enemy and a slog and a half for us.

We reach the necromancer and, having taken so long due to dragging the oblivious Krug with us, his big ritual is complete- he raises a fist-sized black onyx egg aloft, crackles with arcane power and causes the bones around him to coalesce into one massive creature - an undead, giant-sized rust monster, radiating an Aura of pure negative energy. Krug opened his arms wide, eager for the metal-eating monster cockroach to free him from his poison-painted metal prison. It ignores him as he's still very far away. Me and the others have our weapons and armour devoured.

Our DM was very much a stickler for note-taking. So because Damien Bloodmoon hadn't written 'clothes' on his sheet, his armour being eaten by the monster left him naked and afraid.

It became clear that the DM had done another f***y-wucky. See, the Aura of negative energy healed me and the Sorcerer by more than its other attacks did. So whilst Damien Bloodmoon was naked, soaked in mud and bleeding to death almost crushed to a pulp in the fetal position, rocking backwards and forwards as his player seethed with hatred, the Shaman and the Campire set about beating the thing to death with our bear hands and a stick.

The session ended once we killed the necromancer, or rather when Krug walked up to him, closed his arms and just crushed the noodle-armed bad guy to death with the weight of his ridiculous armour and poisoned him with its paintwork.

We never revisited the game afterwards. We were told later on that the DM wanted us to use the non-undead races. But at no point had he said as much, even when we asked him about our characters and the restrictions on them. We also learned a valuable lesson. DM for the players who are there, not the ones who you have an idealised mental image of. Tailor your game, otherwise you'll get a sitcom featuring a camp nosferatu, a shaman with no healing, a paladin who could barely move and a Cleric of murder who was ironically the only one at risk of actually dying.

[nanowrimo]

5 Tips for Finishing Your Novel

April’s session of Camp NaNoWriMo is drawing to a close, and you might find yourself nearing the end of your novel. If you need some tips on writing and polishing the ending of your story, author Derek Murphy is here to share a few! Plus, you can check out the rest of our novel-finishing resources on our #NaNoFinMo page. 

You won NaNoWriMo and have a 50k collection of scenes and sentences, but how do you clean it up and get it done? How do you make sure it’s finished, satisfying and enjoyable? Here are 5 powerful strategies for finishing your novel and some helpful writing tips that will push you past the finish line.

1. Give it a satisfying resolution.

In order to have a powerful story, your book should probably focus on a main character’s change or transformation. There’s an inner war, a.k.a. the character’s emotional healing, and an outer war: the conflict that forced the reckoning. If it’s a purely symbolic internal realization, you can mirror that with actual conflict in the real scene: the breaking of a dish, a fit of rage, a sudden ray of sunlight (or a storm… this should not be pleasant; It’s a breaking point and spiritual death/rebirth).

You can clarify the moment of change by setting up an illustrative contrast, a before and after, that shows how those internal changes have resulted in real-world consequences or benefits. Each character’s unique challenge will match their personal weakness or fear. The price for victory is the one thing they have so far refused to do, or something they cannot give up or bear to lose.

Make sure your protagonist has gone through a transformative struggle to arrive at deep insights, knowledge or awareness. Find a way to deepen the incidental scenes so that they become instrumental to a deeper purpose, leading towards an identity-shifting event.

The plot is what happens, and it’s important. But you can make it more dramatic and meaningful by making sure you demonstrate how hard it was and what it cost. It matters, it is remarkable, because it forced your protagonist to change.

Your conclusion might include:

Physical tension as allies perform a tug-of-war battle against resistance, that shows how difficult this struggle is, and how much force is required.

The consideration phase, as characters are tempted last minute or the price for victory is revealed: the sweet memories that give them awareness that this fight is worth the cost or risk (you need to show them making the choice, knowing what they will lose).

The final flashback, as the full backstory is revealed so we can see exactly why this conflict is so difficult or meaningful for the main character.

2. Add (unresolved) conflict.

Your story is made up of the events and scenes, where something happens. Each new event will push the characters further into the plot. Slow scenes where nothing is really happening can be red flags, so the first thing to focus on is increasing conflict, drama, suspense and intrigue. This is what creates urgency. The full reveal, demonstrating why THIS challenge is so difficult and powerful, should happen just before the final battle or resolution.

You want to make sure every scene, especially in your conclusion, has enough conflict. I recommend these three:

Outer Conflict (threats): Challenges or obstacles that prevent the character from achieving goals.

Inner Conflict (doubts): Moral struggles, decisions, guilt or shame, anger.

Friendly Fire (betrayal): Strong disagreements between allies or supporting characters. 

You want to extend and deepen the potential conflict, without resolving it too easily. The biggest destroyer of conflict is conversation: when your characters just sit around and talk to each other. Most conflict involves a lack of information, and a desire for clarity. A lot of conflict is perceived or imagined.

The most important information needs to come last, and come at a great price. The information that has an emotional impact, and influences their actions and decisions, should be big reveals at dramatic peaks. A surprise or twist should be treated as an event: each scene is leading towards a change or new piece of information that provokes the protagonist to respond.

3. Fill plot holes with character motivation.

After you’ve made sure that “what actually happens” is intriguing (opening questions and raising tensions without resolving them) you can focus on making sure the plot holes are filled, and characters are properly motivated – these two things are usually adjacent.

You can find and fill plot holes by asking:

Why are the characters doing this?

Why does any of it matter?

Basically, readers need to respect the main characters enough to care what happens to them, so their choices and actions need to make sense within the given information. If there’s a simpler, easier solution, readers will get stuck up on “why didn’t they just…”? To fix plot holes and gaps in logic or continuity, or make the story go where you need it to, you can add urgency, fix the mood of the scene (bigger stakes require bigger justifications), show characters in a weakened mental state, or raise concerns but have them dismissed, with an excuse or justification.

You need rational characters to make plausible choices that lead to dire consequences. You need show why they don’t do something easier, or nothing at all, or why they face clear challenges, despite potential obstacles.

They’ll also require a deeper motivation, for why they’re willing to put themselves in identity-destroying conflict, rather than just giving up or running away. Why do they stay in THIS fight, when they’ve run from similar ones? If they weren’t ready at the beginning, why are the ready now – what changed in them, as a result of your story’s journey?

Your protagonist needs to have a strong, consistent internal compass, and it needs to be revealed through incidents that establish their character. This is who they are. Without this reliable core identity, we won’t be able to tell a story that forces them to change. 

4. Let readers picture your story with detailed description.

In the final stages of revision, you can begin improving the description with specific details.

It’s smart to start – or end – a chapter with a vivid, immediate scene. You want to leave readers with an image they can see in their minds, hopefully connected to the feeling you aim to evoke. You can close a chapter with a reference back to a motif or image, with a deeper or more reflective context; applying meaning to the metaphor. This will help readers feel engaged, be moved, and leave a lasting impact.

Vivid scenes are mostly a matter of detailed description, so add the specifics about the story environment. Be precise, not vague. Instead of “she put a plate of tea and snacks on the table” you can write “she gently placed an antique porcelain teapot on the table. I could smell it was Earl Grey from the scent of bergamot. The half-sleeve of Oreos and can of onion-flavored Pringles seemed incongruous with the fancy dishes, but I knew she was making an effort to welcome me.”

Focus on the sensations and feelings; but also zero-in on any potential sources of conflict or internal emotions or states of mind. In my example above, the host might be nervous or ashamed of her spread; or perhaps she has a degenerative brain disease and doesn’t notice the incongruity. Tensions are unspoken, potential sources of negative feelings. They hover in the background of your description.

Readers will remember the pictures you put in their heads, not the words on the page.

Description should serve and be bound to the story, not distract from it.

It should be squeezed into and around the scene action, when the protagonist is using or exploring.

Show what’s different, not what’s the same.

Leave space for readers to fill in the gaps, but get them started in the right direction so they aren’t surprised later.

Sidenote: be careful about your metaphors, analogies and similes. Each one will put a picture into readers’ minds, and it can quickly get overcrowded with imagery. You’re asking them to ignore your real scene and think of something else. Use them to confirm and amplify the scene you have, and limit distractions.

5. Prepare to publish.

Typos are bad, but perfectionism will ruin you. This section is about editing and proofreading, but I don’t have time for all that, and you don’t either. The real problem with a story is rarely the number of typos. A very clean book isn’t better if people stop reading.

You can solve a lot of common writing problems, with my big list of 25 common writing mistakes, and self-edit your manuscript to make it as good as possible. After that, a copyeditor or proofreader isn’t always the best investment (and it can also be the biggest publishing cost).

Instead, use an editing software (I like Grammarly) to root out obvious mistakes, but don’t dwell on the small stuff like perfecting every word or rearranging the commas. Spending a very long time wrestling a poorly-written manuscript in shape is less effective than getting something (actually) done to the point where you’re comfortable sharing it.

This may be difficult at first, but you can’t learn and improve without genuine reader feedback (from people who aren’t your mom or best friend; nor the short-sighted opinions of a self-proclaimed literature enthusiast). You need to find readers who enjoy your particular genre, and the sooner you find them, the more valuable feedback you can get.

Shorten the feedback loop: Get over the fear and focus on learning by getting feedback early and often. However, this doesn’t just mean joining a writer’s club: writers are brutal and might focus on trivial things. The safest bet is to make it public, on Wattpad at least. Or get a cheap cover and throw it up on Kindle, Draft2Digital or even your own blog.

Making it public is scary and vulnerable, but it’s better than letting the fear of messing up keep you from the brutal, necessary experience of allowing readers to tell you what they liked and disliked about your writing. Will some people be critical? Yes! But guess what, you’ll get negative reviews even if you’re a brilliant, famous writer. Those are inevitable. And the first negative reviews may teach you more about writing than 10 years attempting to self-edit, afraid of putting your book out into the world.

PS. You can use resources, like my 24-chapter plot outline, as a way to spot story gaps in your manuscript and improve the structure (especially if your book suffers from a “soggy middle.)

Derek Murphy has a PhD in Literature, writes urban fantasy and is the founder of the alliance of young adult authors. More recently, he’s started sharing writing tips on http://www.writethemagic.com

Top photo by Adegbenro Emmanuel Dipo on Unsplash.

[thelastspeecher]

West Coast Trio AU - Angie’s Sweet Ride

A little while back I decided Angie gets a motorcycle in the West Coast Trio AU (also known as the Nerd Stan/Greaser Angie AU).  Here’s the origin for that motorcycle, as well as a little bit more backstory for Stan and what he’s doing at West Coast Tech.

——————————————————————————————

             Stan was walking back to the dorm from class when he heard a familiar voice coming from the parking lot.

             “You really got it fer me?”  Stan immediately changed direction to follow the voice. He arrived at the parking lot, where his friend and secret crush, Quinn McGucket, was speaking to someone he recognized as one of her brothers.

             Harper, right?  The one that works in Hollywood?  Harper was grinning at Quinn, who bounced on the balls of her feet excitedly.

             “Of course I got it fer ya!  I said I would, didn’t I?”

             “Yes, but still!” Quinn gushed.  Harper chuckled.  He held out a set of car keys.  Quinn reached for them, but he yanked them away.

             “Ah, ah, ah.  What are the rules?”

             “Don’t tell Ma ‘n Pa.”

             “And?”

             “Don’t expect any birthday or Christmas gifts fer a while.”

             “Got it in one.”  Harper handed the keys over to Quinn, who promptly let out a very un-Quinnlike squeal of delight.  “Take good care of her.”

             “Of course!” Quinn said, waving a hand airily. Harper chuckled again.  He looked up, catching sight of Stan.

             “Oh, yer paramour is here,” he drawled.  Stan blushed.  Quinn looked over.  She scowled and punched Harper roughly.

             “Don’t call him that!”

             “Is that any way to treat the person what just gave ya yer own set of wheels?” Harper asked.  Quinn punched him again, eliciting a laugh from her older brother. “Don’t just stand there watchin’ like a stranger, come on over!” Harper called.  Stan grinned slightly and walked up to the siblings.  As he got closer, he could see a motorcycle parked next to the curb. “Whattaya think of Angie’s gift?”

             “Who?” Stan asked.  Harper snickered.  Stan blinked. “Oh, right.”  He and Ford had learned a few months back that Quinn was actually his friend’s middle name.  She used to go by Angie, a nickname of her first name, and her family still referred to her by it.

             But she doesn’t seem to mind being called “Angie”, at least.  Stan’s musings faded away as he finally registered what Harper had said.

             “Wait.”  Stan stared at Quinn.  “This is your motorcycle?”

             “It sure is!” Quinn crowed.

             “Do you even know how to drive it?”

             “I wouldn’t have asked fer one if I didn’t,” Quinn said tartly, crossing her arms.  “I’ve been takin’ lessons fer ages.”

             “Right.  Duh.” Stan frowned.  “Is that the reason you kept turning down D, D, and More D sessions with me and Ford?  You’ve been taking motorcycle lessons?”  Quinn winced.

             “It’s part of the reason,” she said slowly. Harper snickered.

             “You like that game?”

             “Only ‘cause Ford finally set up a sci-fi campaign,” Stan said.  “I’m not a big fan of fantasy crap.”  Harper raised an eyebrow curiously.

             “You can do sci-fi versions of it?”

             “Yeah.”

             “Huh.  I might have to look into it m’self.”

             “Ugh, I’m surrounded by nerds,” Quinn muttered. Harper laughed.  He ruffled Quinn’s magenta-colored hair.

             “Who was the one what got a full ride scholarship to West Coast Institute of Technology?” he teased.  Quinn elbowed him.  “All right, all right.”

             “Why’d you get a motorcycle?” Stan asked, staring at the aforementioned vehicle.  Quinn grinned.

             “Harper was actually the one who brought it up. He said that my new ‘look’ needed a motorcycle,” Quinn drawled.  “And when he mentioned it, well, I latched onto that idea right quick.”

             “Bein’ the amazin’ brother I am, I got her what she deserved.”  Harper ruffled Quinn’s hair again.  “Now I’m good on gifts fer a while.”

             “Yes, yes, ya most certainly are,” Quinn said. She let out another uncharacteristic squeal.  “I can’t believe I’ve fin’ly got m’self a motorbike!”  She pulled something out of her pocket.  “I got the driver’s license yesterday!”

             “Cool, can I see?” Stan asked.  Quinn handed her driver’s license to him.  Stan looked down at the card.  He grinned.  “You’re pretty photogenic if even you look good in a driver’s license picture.”

             “Aw, shucks.”

             “Huh.”  Stan frowned. “There’s a pretty big typo, though.”

             “Really?” Quinn said, sounding disappointed. “Where?”  Stan held out the driver’s license and pointed at the first name. “…Oh.”  She rubbed her forehead.  “That ain’t a typo.”

             “What do you mean?  It’s gotta be.”

             “No, it’s not.”

             “But it says…”  Stan squinted at the print.  “Banjolina?”

             “Stanley.”  Stan looked up at Quinn, who had a pained expression on her face.  “My older brother is named Fiddleford.”

             “Wait.  Your name is actually Banjolina?” Stan asked, aghast.  Quinn nodded.

             “Now ya see why I go by my middle name.”

             “Hey, don’t say stuff like that,” Harper scolded. “You were named after Pa’s fav’rite sister!”  Quinn crossed her arms.

             “You don’t have any authority in a conversation ‘bout names, Harper,” she retorted.

             “And Stanley does?”

             “Well, my twin is named Stanford,” Stan said. Harper nodded.

             “Right.  Carry on.”

             “Please don’t tell Stanford my first name,” Quinn begged.

             “How does he not know already?” Stan asked. “Aren’t you guys in classes together?”

             “When they do roll call, I interrupt while they’re stumblin’ over my name and tell ‘em I go by Quinn.  But half the time, they don’t even try my first name, they just say McGucket.”  Quinn scowled.  “And they don’t usually get that right, either.”  She shook her head.  “Whatever. Promise ya won’t tell Stanford?”

             “I promise,” Stan said, handing back her driver’s license.  Quinn grinned.  “So, are you gonna take your new ride for a spin or what?”

             “Eek!” Quinn squealed.  She rushed over to the motorcycle.

             “Put yer helmet on,” Harper called.  Quinn waved at him dismissively, but put on the helmet that had been resting on the motorcycle’s seat.  She carefully got on the motorcycle and turned it on.  “Be careful on that thing, lil sis.”

             “I know, I know!”   With that, Quinn zoomed away.

             “Think you’ll take a ride with her once she’s had some more practice?” Harper asked Stan.  Stan shrugged.

             “If she came back and offered to take me for a ride, I’d take her up on it.”

             “Really?”

             “Yeah.”

             “Wow.”  Harper shook his head.  “Yer too trustin’, kid.”  He raised an eyebrow.  “Or maybe yer just too head over heels fer my baby sister.”  Stan felt his cheeks redden.  Harper chuckled.  “Don’t worry, I won’t get on yer case.”  They watched Quinn do donuts in the parking lot.  “At least, not ‘til ya actually start datin’ her.”

-----

             Stan watched Quinn sketch animatedly.  They were sitting underneath the big maple outside the biology building, waiting for their next class to start.

             “Whatchya drawing?” Stan asked.  Quinn looked up.

             “I’m just tryin’ to figure out some ideas fer detailin’ my bike,” she chirped.  Stan cocked his head.

             “You just got it and you already wanna customize it?”

             “Stanley, I’m the youngest of six.  I need to customize all my possessions.”  She blew a strand of magenta-colored hair out of her face.  “Includin’ my hair.”

             “I get that.”  Stan leaned over to look at her sketches.  “Uh, what are these?”

             “Daisies!”

             “Um…”  Stan stared at the misshapen blobs.  “What kinda daisies look like that?”  Quinn sighed.

             “I know, I ain’t exactly an artist.  In my defense, I don’t practice much.”

             “Don’t you have to do drawings for science stuff? I’ve seen Ford do it for his biology classes,” Stan said.  Quinn elbowed him.

             “You say that like yer not majorin’ in science.”

             “Psychology is way different from biology or physics.”

             “Yeah, yeah, yeah.”  Quinn looked down at her notebook with a slight scowl.  “My professors give us a lot of wiggle room fer anything we have to draw.  Ford’s an exception when it comes to artistic ability in the sciences.  Luckily, I’ve got a backup when it comes to findin’ things in the field.”

             “What?”

             “My camera,” Quinn said proudly.  Stan nodded.  He’d seen Quinn’s vintage camera before; she said it was one of her favorite possessions.  But he had yet to see any pictures she’d taken with it.  “I can’t draw worth a darn, but I can make a salamander look like a movie star.”  Stan couldn’t help his grin.

             She walks around campus with a baseball bat she can and will use, but she still tries to avoid saying too many four-letter words.

             “Well, if you want, I’m sure I could get Ford to draw up some daisies,” Stan said.  “And you can show those to the guy who details your motorcycle.”

             “Or you could draw ‘em yourself,” Quinn teased. She slid her notebook into Stan’s lap. “I’ve seen yer lil doodles. They’re awful nice.”  She held out her pencil.  Stan took it from her.

             “You drive a hard bargain.”  He began to idly sketch out some flowers, trying to remember what daisies specifically looked like.  “Why flowers?  Don’t motorcycles usually have flames?”

             “I’m namin’ her Daisy.  After my horse back home.”  Stan looked up.  “What?”

             “You’ve got a horse?”

             “I grew up on a farm.”

             “Is that common for people on farms?”

             “Fairly common, yes,” Quinn said, poorly hiding a smile.  Stan smiled in return before turning back to his sketches.  “When are ya goin’ to want a ride on her?”

             “Any time you’ve got a spare helmet for me.”

             “Yer mom ain’t here to scold ya, y’know.”

             “I dunno.  I feel like there’s a decent chance she’s actually psychic.  She had an uncanny knack for knowing when I was gonna sneak outta the house or do something that might hurt me.”

             “I don’t hear the word ‘uncanny’ often,” Quinn mused.

             “I learned it from comic books,” Stan muttered.

             “Hey, no need to be ashamed by that.  Ya learn new words how ya learn new words,” Quinn said. She tilted her head.  “I’m a bit surprised yer so eager to go fer a ride on my new motorbike.  Yer not exactly a daredevil, and I am technically still a new driver.”

             “I’ve got good reason to not be a daredevil,” Stan said flatly.  Quinn sighed.

             “Yes.  I know,” she said in an undertone.  “After bein’ sick fer so long ‘n becomin’ so weak afterwards, I can’t blame ya fer avoidin’ anything that might bring ya back to that.”

             “Yeah.  I’ve had my fill of hospitals.”  Stan sighed. “Didn’t stop me from asking Mom and Pops for a motorcycle back in high school.”

             “Really?  Why?”

             “The same reason you wanted one.  They’re cool as all hell.”  Stan snorted.  “I thought Mom was gonna have a heart attack.”

             “I’m assumin’ they said no?”

             “Yep.  I barely managed to convince Mom to let me learn how to drive a regular car. Motorcycles were solidly off the table.” Stan erased a wobbly line and redrew it. “Sorta wish they weren’t.”

             “They aren’t anymore.”

             “Heh.”  Stan smiled at Quinn.  “Yeah.”

             “By the by, why’d ya decide to major in psychology?” Quinn asked.  “I don’t think ya ever told me.”

             “It’s a bit personal.”

             “More personal than anything else we’ve shared with each other?” Quinn said pointedly.  Stan rolled his eyes.  “C’mon. You can tell me.”

             “Fine.”  Stan looked back at the notebook.  “I wanna help kids who went through the sorta stuff I did.”

             “Bein’ sick?”

             “Well, yeah, but…”  Stan resumed drawing flowers.  “…my folks weren’t as good as it sounds like yours were.  Being sick was bad enough, but the way Mom and Pops handled it…”

             “Not well?”

             “That’s putting it lightly.  Pops didn’t think it was an excuse to get out of anything, even when I could barely walk up the stairs, and Mom kept me under lock and key.”

             “That stinks,” Quinn said softly.  Stan merely grunted in response.  “I understand how that could weigh on ya as a child.”  She leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder.  Stan froze. He could already feel his cheeks turning red at the close contact.  “I think it’s mighty great of ya to want to protect others from somethin’ ya went through.”

             “Really?”

             “Yeah.  I’d call it downright heroic.”

             “I’m not a hero.”

             “Maybe not today.  But someday.”  Quinn smiled up at Stan.  “After all, what is a hero if not someone who protects children?”

[justanotherpersonsuniverse]

Game Master Akuma AU by  crisisdparity

Xavier Duchamp was rather proud of himself. What he had before him was an absolute masterpiece of a campaign if he did say so himself. The product of over six months of study, research, and rebalancing efforts followed by two weeks of discussion with his five players to hash out schedules, meeting times, characters, backstories, potential character arcs, and getting them set up with a messaging app that was really good for sending discrete messages between the GM and the players. Valentine and her boyfriend Justin were onboard in an instant. Within days, he’d greenlighted their Half-Elf Bard of the College of Glamour whose spell list was 100% Illusion spells and Half-Orc Fighter (Eldritch Knight) who was focusing entirely on Abjuration as Rena Rouge and Carapace respectively. Olivia had spent a few days coming up with a Halfling Rogue and debating subclasses with him until settling on Scout. Along with some discussion over how her special magic item’s stunning and paralysis effect would work with Sneak Attack, the campaign had its Vesperia. Jeanette had gone back and forth with him for a week looking at various homebrew subclasses for her Gnome Artificer before they both agreed on one particular Master Tinkerer entry that would be balanced and do the character justice. And with that they had their Ladybug. Even Matt was on board with a stealthy human Chat the Barbarian using the Path of the Beast. The class choice was something Matt had insisted on (and that Xavier would have suggested anyway just for the high hit point totals given Matt’s history with characters dying) and he’d even come up with a backstory that Xavier felt was quite compelling compared to Matt’s usual efforts. Morally ambiguous, likely to be tempted by promises of power, but with a great deal of story potential to work with. Which was a relief. Getting a new player into their group to replace Matt was not something Xavier really felt comfortable with. There were too many unknowns with introducing a new person, far too many for him to risk his masterpiece on an unknown factor. He knew Matt. He could work with Matt. Despite the history. He’d put everything he had into this. Every known Akuma ever fought by the heroes had been made into a boss-tier foe. He’d carefully documented each and every power the heroes had shown to craft special legendary magic items based on the Miraculous. Hawkmoth and Mayura themselves were going to be the final bosses of his campaign. In response to criticism about the difficulty of his campaigns (he tried to make them fair, but still challenging enough to be memorable), he’d made several guest NPCs based on every other hero that had ever been called upon, statted out like player characters that might show up in a pinch to help. He even had a genuine Deus ex Machina that he was ready to use to get the players out of a truly impossible jam if they found themselves in one. Not always, but a few times at least. Enough to get them to the point where they wouldn’t need it anymore. —– It was thirty minutes in, right in the middle of exposition from the Guardian NPC, when Xavier got his first message on the app. Matt/Chat - Chat’s going to wait until everyone breaks up and follow Ladybug stealthily. Xavier/GM - Starting party conflict on the first session? Not what I’d advise, but it’s your character. Go ahead and make your Stealth roll now. Matt/Chat - <photo> 17 Xavier/GM - Yeah, that beats everyone’s passive Perception easily. You’ll sneak off handily without anyone noticing. —– “Jeanette, Ladybug is grabbed from behind by an unknown assailant. Roll to resist the grapple.” “Geez, already? Okay, what did my assailant get for their grapple? How screwed am I?” Xavier pretended to roll a die while consulting the message from Matt. “19.” “Okay, difficult, but not undoable… Crap.” “What’d you get?” “Nat 1…” “Hah! I rip off her earrings and claim them for myself! The Wish is mine!” “Seriously Matt?! What the hell?!” “Because it’s payback time! Payback for every character of mine killed in these hellish

campaigns!” “Oh, come on! You’re not the only person whose had a character die at this table! <GM> runs some pretty challenging campaigns, but they’re always fair!” “What about the time he killed Allric the Allmighty in a single round of combat?” “Dude, you tried to Leroy Jenkins straight into melee with a 4th-level Wizard that had a CON penalty. Even at full health you had like 10 hp.” “14!” “Not much better, dude.” “Guys, it’s fine. I can handle this. Okay, Matt. Chat the Barbarian managed to get the earrings-” “Yeah, Ladybug screams bloody murder when he rips them out. Good luck getting out of this in one piece.” “The moment Rena hears Ladybug scream, she bolts for the sound.” “So does Carapace.” “Vesperia too.” “-and with their current locations and movement speeds, I assume you’re all using the Dash action?, you’ve got maybe one round to decide on your Wish before they’re all over you, so choose carefully. And be aware that I plan to grant whatever you wish for in the worst possible way, just as I would if any of the others pulled this.” “Rena screams ‘What the HELL, Chat?! We’re supposed to protect the Miraculous, not use them for our own selfish purposes! Didn’t you listen to the Guardian? Such actions always bring misfortune upon those who misuse the Miraculous!’” “Because I am Chat, avatar of Destruction and I WISH THIS WORLD NEVER EXISTED!” There was dead silence at the table. “Matt… What… just… WHAT?!” “Hah! You like that?! How does it feel now that the shoe’s on the other foot, huh?!” “What the hell is your problem, Matt?!” “My problem? MY problem?! Do you know how much time I’ve spent making characters for these shitty campaigns only to have them turned into paste in one session?!” “Because you made primary spellcasters and played every last one of them like a barbarian, charging in headfirst without thinking! All of us breathed a sigh of relief when you revealed that your character finally matched your playstyle!” “I HATE BARBARIANS! THEY’RE BORING! I SHOULD GET TO PLAY CHARACTERS THAT CAN AT LEAST CHUCK FIREBALLS!” “THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP RUNNING THEM FACE FIRST INTO ENEMY SWORDS!” “NONE OF YOU COULD EVER HANDLE THE FACT THE I MAKE MORE AWESOME CHARACTERS THAN ANY OF YOU, SO YOU JUST LET THIS DOUCHEBAG KILL THEM OFF SO YOU WOULDN’T GET OVERSHADOWED BY HOW AMAZING I AM! WELL NOW I KILLED SOMETHING YOU ALL WORKED HARD ON, SO SUCK IT! I’M DONE WITH ALL OF YOU FOREVER!” “MATT! HEY! GET BACK HERE YOU JERK! MATT!” “Crap, I think Olivia might actually kill him this time…” “It’s going to take all of us to stop her from getting arrested at least.” Xavier just watched numbly as the rest of the group ran out of his apartment. Over six months of work. Gone in less than an hour. He’d given so much to making sure this would work. He’d apologized to Matt at least twice for every character of his that had died to get him to come back. He’d agreed to demand after demand just to keep a familiar face on board, never dreaming he’d pull something like this. He’d nearly gotten fired from his job trying to rearrange his schedule to fit with everyone else’s. They’d somehow, miraculously, gotten the whole day with no other obligations among any of them and decided to make the first session a true marathon. They’d meet in the morning after breakfast and eat both lunch and dinner at the game table before calling it a night late in the evening. It was barely 10:00 in the morning and the whole campaign he’d slaved over for months was kaput. He never noticed the butterfly landing on his custom Miraculous-themed Game Master screen and being absorbed into it. “Game Master, I am Hawkmoth. Few people appreciate the kind of effort that goes into making something truly grand and memorable. I shall give you the power to bring your entire world to life and in return, I ask only for a few simple things.” This was wrong. Hawkmoth was the worst of the worst. The kind of person who would be at home among all the final bosses he’d ever made for his campaigns. Heartless, manipulative, cruel. “Not

enough? Ah, but what is a game without players? How would you like to have the Miraculous heroes themselves run your great campaign? Surely they would be far more appreciative than those ungrateful peons that left you alone with nothing but the broken remains of your efforts.” He knew all these things, but the allure of bringing the world he’d spent so much time on to life… What creator could ever turn down an offer like that? “I, the Game Master, accept… Hawkmoth.” “Excellent. And in exchange, you shall bring me one of two things: The Miraculous, or the identities of their wielders.” “No.” Hawkmoth was silent for a moment. “I beg your pardon?” “I said no. I am the Game Master. I make the world. I craft the challenges. I decide the rewards. But I do not do anything for anyone. If you want these things, get them yourself.” “If you refuse me, it shall be very unpleasant for you.” “No. As Game Master, I decide the limits of all powers within my realm. And I decide that you have none over me.” And with that, he unleashed his creation over all of Paris, drawing everyone and everything within into his sphere of influence. —– Ladybug blinked the spots (ha) out of her eyes as the flash of light died down and looked at herself. She didn’t remember transforming, but she was clearly in her spots. Except her red and black superhero uniform didn’t usually look like it was headed to a steampunk convention. Looking around, she tried to figure out what had happened and her eyes landed on a familiar belt and pants combo. Problem. Whoever this was, their groin was at eye level for her. She looked up. And up. To find a grinning Chat Noir, sans anything resembling a shirt and having put on at least a foot of height and apparently a hundred pounds of pure muscle, grinning down at her. “How’s the weather down there?” Chat Noir chuckled as he flexed his unfairly attractive muscleman physique. “I WILL END YOU!” the heroine snarled, already 100% done with whatever new insanity Hawkmoth had cooked up. Characters: Ladybug - Gnome Artificer (Master Tinkerer - Homebrew) Chat Noir - Human Barbarian (Path of the Beast) —– Vesperia had to admit, as Akuma attacks went, this was pretty dope. She was currently a halfling. A halfling! If it wasn’t for her fantasy ensemble being yellow and black, she’d have thought she stepped straight out of Lord of the Rings. Of course, fantasy setting or not, there were still things she’d have rather left back in the real world. Like racism. And stigma against mixed couples. Not directed at her, but rather at the two walking down the street next to her. “You know, people are staring…” she said as she craned her head to look at her companions. “Let them,” the Half-Elf Rena Rouge (who looked like a cross between a musician and a belly dancer) said from her perch atop the shoulders of the heavily armored (and surprisingly buff) Half-Orc Carapace. “They’re just jealous because their boyfriends can’t carry them everywhere.” Characters: Vesperia - Halfling Rogue (Scout) Rena Rouge - Half-Elf Bard (College of Glamour) Carapace - Half-Orc Fighter (Eldritch Knight) —– Ryuko blinked as she studied the apparent snake-man-thing before her who claimed to be Viperion. She lifted a hand to study it and found what appeared to be bronze scales covering every inch of her skin. She sniffed herself, smelling the sharp tang of ozone. What was she? And why did she appear to be wearing wooden armor? Characters: Ryuko - Dragonborn (bronze) Druid (Circle of Storms - Third Party) Viperion - Naga Sorcerer (Divination Magic - Homebrew) —– Polymouse giggled as her friends ran over her. Okay, she’d freaked out a little to find a swarm of mice (with hair like hers no less) crawling all over her surprisingly mouse-like body when she’d come to in the middle of some forest somewhere. But she’d gotten over it pretty quickly. It helped that her new friends were adorable. It might help more if she could figure out where she was. Or find another person. Characters: Polymouse - Kobold

(rodentlike) Ranger (Swarmkeeper - Reskinned) —– Purple Tigress sighed as she felt the hair (fur?) on the top of her head being shifted around and twitched her new catlike ears in mild annoyance. “Are you quite done?” “Almost!” Pigella’s cheerful voice answered. “Your fur is so comfy!” Tigress sighed. Of course Pigella would end up being a fairy, and having her normal cheerful enthusiasm cranked up to previously unimagined levels. “I love you dearly, but if you start shouting 'hey listen’ I will stick you in a bottle.” “Aw, I love you too! Hey, what’s that?” “I think it’s my character sheet?” Characters: Purple Tigress - Tabaxi Paladin (Oath of Glory) Pigella - Fairy Cleric (Order Domain - Reskinned) —– “According to my analysis, we have been placed into what appears to be a Dungeons and Dragons campaign under 5th edition rules,” Pegasus stated in a mechanical monotone. “I am apparently a Warforged Wizard using the School of Conjuration whose spells create portals to bridge dimensions and summon or banish my intended targets. You are what is known as a Simic Hybrid, with the class of Monk, following the Way of the Drunken Master.” “Aweshum,” King Monkey slurred, his generally human appearance clad in monk’s robes marred by his monkey-like hands and feet as well as the monkey tail swishing behind him. “Why do you keep slurring like that? According to my sensors, your gourd is filled with only water.” “Gotta keep up appearanshes!” King Monkey grinned as he continued faking drunkenness. Characters: Pegasus - Warforged Wizard (School of Conjuration - Reskinned) King Monkey - Simic Hybrid Monk (Way of the Drunken Master) —– Hawkmoth studied the dark red horns growing out of his head in the mirror. The change in appearance was disconcerting, but he felt a rush of power in this new form that he’d never felt before. “Hmm… perhaps I can work with this…” “Speak for yourself…” Mayura muttered off to the side, ruffling her peacock-like feathers in annoyance as she tried to glare at the beak on her own face. Characters: Hawkmoth - Tiefling Dark Lord, Warlock Patron, Contracted by Lila Rossi, Volpina, Queen Wasp, and many others. Mayura - Kenku Assistant to the Dark Lord, Creator of Monsters —– “Oh, come on!” A figure in a cyan and white hooded robe complained as they waved a similarly colored umbrella around angrily. “Everyone else gets to be part of this adventure, why can’t I join them?” “Because you’re too OP. You’d completely break everything and remove all challenge from the adventure.” “But sitting around is no fun at all!” “If you like, I can put you in the position of the main quest giver. Your job would be to direct them towards their enemies and means of becoming stronger.” “That’s it?! I’m on 'mysterious hooded figure’ duty? Boo! Why can’t I fight with them?!” “Because you’re too OP. But if you insist, I’ll allow some Deus ex Machina interventions.” “YES!” “Five.” “I’m sorry?” “I’ll allow five interventions at your discretion to aid them when they are in peril. Once you have come to their aid five times, I will allow no more meetings save to impart quest information.” “That’s it?” “Yes. Choose your interventions wisely.” “So… if I manage to save one for when they fight Hawmoth and Mayura in the final battle…?” “Then I would allow you to join them of course.” “Score!” Characters: Bunnyx: Mysterious Hooded Figure, Deus-ex-Machina (5) Game Master: Akuma Lord of the Miraculous Campaign —– Addendum When the Game Master is finally purified and the damage reversed, it turns out that he took the effort to trap all of Paris in a temporal stasis bubble so that no matter how long passed inside no more than a few moments passed outside. Meaning that after what seemed like months in the bubble, it’s basically less than a minute after he was akumatized when everything is put back. All his friends, minus Matt, come back in bringing a new person named Zack that they vetted themselves to take Matt’s place in case he pulled something like what he did. And while he

has a similar playstyle to Matt, he’s savvy enough to know what kind of characters that is suited for and he loves playing barbarians. They all sit back down and restart the game they were all looking forward to.

—-

oh wow- that’s- wow. good job dude, seems like you worked on this a lot. Next time You should post this on your own account though, as this isn’t getting tagged or anything. Thank you though, you did a good job with this.