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#I am so happy that he is living a wonderful life
erabu-san · 2 days
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First of all, I would like to thank you so much for all your support and your kind message !! Thank you so much for being patient with me too !! (you will see, I thanks a lot in this post lol)
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Haha tbh I believe that ignoring and move on is a great way too! Yeees when I read this anon ask, I was wondering if they are living somewhere where pale person are oppressed and they are personally in this case and it affects them so badly that they have so much hate in them or they are just being hateful toward poc w/o any explication ? It was a bit uncomfortable And what is appealing with Genshin Impact (for me) is the fact that they use real culture to create their game ; even in the last survey, they ask if we like Natlan's authenticity (weird they only ask abt environment and music, i think they know they have issue with character design bahaha). I learn a lot about persian, algerian, but also chinese and even about french culture ! It is because people recognize themself that they start talking about it. I know there is a lot of controversial topic in Natlan, but because of this, I learn a lot on Hawai'i 's culture too. So yes, even if it is fiction, representation *is* important. And it is because they take inspiration of their culture that there is people who want a better representation, and in my opinion, this is something to not ignore !
About taking well what anon said, thank you so much ! If i can be honest tho, I didn't take it very well neither, or just I don't know how do I really felt at the moment I am an adult but I still hard time to distinguish what is morally okay or not, what is bad and good ? So if someone doesn't tell me they are explicitly a bad person with bad intention, I won't get it haha (ofc I grew up and now I identify my value and morals, but I still questionning if my morals are objectively great or not- yeaaah i was called weird for that, I am aware) Since forever I always try to understand other so I can communicate properly (at least I try), and that's why I am always interested on how does people think, why do they react in this specific way etc etc. Pro, I am patient and can take even the most violent take "well" (all depends. I am still a human) Con, I give free speech to those who have a "bad" take </3 and I apologize for that aaaa
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KFSDLFSD I wish to express my angryness sometime but I just don't know if it is really adequate What if I interpret their text in wrong way as they initially try to say ? I wasn't feel offended by what they said, I was just uncomfortable because their opinion is something I consider hateful. and what if i was wrong??? But reading you all's opinion just affirm that's they were indeed rude ! I should stop overthink, life would be easier Maybe next time I have a doubt I will ask my friends's opinion before answering ksdkfsf
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Oh my god thank you !!! If i can be honest, I draw Kinich this way because when I draw him w a darker skin for the first time, I thought "Oh !!! he looks so cool !!!!" and seeing a lot of positive comment abt my Kinich just makes me happy so I keep him like this ! And thank you for sharing with me informations !<<333 This is not overstepping at all ! And it is a reciprocate feeling anon ! It might be a bit weird but "angry" is such a complex feeling for me. I feel it but I don't really know how to express it in the most healthy way and it is super frustrating. So... seeing people getting mad at something I also disagree on makes me feel better !! And for this, thank you all !
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I SNORT SO HAAAARD Damn Macron you again..........!! I didn't put all ask here but I read them all !! Thank you for sharing with me your opinion and reaction, it is truly interesting (and way more relaxing that the hater anon kskskss) !! and again, your support is truly meaningful for me. You all have sincere gratitude Hope y'all have a great day !! Stay hydrated too <3
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misstiramisssu · 1 day
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I am having an aggressive emotional hangover after playing the To The Moon Beach Episode and need to talk about it. I want to talk to other fans about it but alas, I am alone in my fervor rn.
Polite spoiler break (just in case) but tldr I am satisfied with the end but also an aggressive romantic so I've just been CRYING
How dare Neil say the things he says and do the things he does? The man's been dead since the first game? And yes this whole series has always been about managing grief and loss and living life to the fullest and we knew, we knew, we KNEW he was going to die but the undying flame of hope still burned in my heart for a sliver of happiness for these two but we instead get to see our beloved Eva crumbling and broken in the wake of her closest confidant's passing and how she has to keep going on despite that. Yet she keeps crawling back into the comfort of his last gift to her and ruminating in a world that'll never be. I'm aching FOR these sweet characters never being canonically able to express their feelings, to share a shred of their reciprocated feelings... and that's okay.
Part of me wants to read and write fan fiction where they get to simply be. The fantasy and all... And that's part of what fan fiction is for... At the same time, I jokingly wonder if that would be doing the same thing as Eva, ruminating... It's a dramatic stretch I won't linger in but I hope my intention comes through?
And what really got me was how dare this man only tell her he was in love after he died? And by his computer shadow self? That must have been so devastating for her to hear. Though she doesn't say I love you too in the game she's upset that he made that decision for her and is so reluctant to let him GO? That she fights with the virtual version of him to have the one she actually loves even if it's only an echo of the self? It's so MUCH.
I AM DISTRAUGHT AND CAN'T STOP CRYING.
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Pic by Polly
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Person with no whimsy: Why are you trying to trick g-d with loopholes? 🙄🙄🙄🙄
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angelmush · 2 months
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the other day i walked around the golden lake w my love and the sun was setting hot and orange and we watched a brown duck preening through the weeds, ducking her head under the dark water. the cool lake swallowed up my tired feet to the ankles and we counted the dog walkers with their curly panting doodles and their handsome german shepherds and their whip smart little terriers and we admired the careful construction of a sand castle whose moat held determinedly against the lapping of the waves. we could feel in our chests the persistent thunderous thumping of celebratory music at the finish line of the lakeside 5k, welcoming each gasping runner across its bounds. and i felt like crying. i felt like curling into myself and crying. we walked through the swamp of the bird sanctuary afterwards and listened to the woods sing and croak and groan and then we went and got ube and yuzu gelato and devoured it suntired and sweating on the couch in our living room. and i was so overcome w a deep and true unshakeable happiness and a sort of confused grief that i wanted to sob and sob and sob.
#i am so happy for the first time in my entire life#a consistent and true joyfulness#i am in love w my life#i want to stick around to see it#and i mean that w my entire being for the first time in my whole life#and to say that means confronting the first 24 years of my life where that wasn’t true#where i was miserable and heartbroken and unkind and dishonest and cruel#and i didn’t want to be alive#even when i was doing well i still didn’t want to be alive#for 24 years.#i had no fucking idea being alive could be so easy. i had no idea.#i want to hold myself and tell them i want to wrap myself up and say it will be BETTER#it will be so so far from perfect but it will be so so good you just have to hold on#i am so happy but i am mourning#i don’t know how to articulate it at all i just feel#happy but grieving#i LOVE this new city we live in i LOVE it here#i like my job enough to stand it for enough hours a week to get by#i have the time and the energy to throw myself into hobbies like knitting and cooking#i watch one or two good movies a week#i eat delicious food i’ve made and from restaurants we want to try#i’m IN LOVE. with my girlfriend in a way that’s so overwhelming and unlike anything i’ve ever felt that words don’t do it justice#i have friends who are gentle and patient with me when it’s hard for me to reach out#i am fighting agoraphobia tooth and fucking nail and i’m seeing the world and experiencing it#i laugh every day!!!! every single day!!!!#i have a goofy wonderful dog and an incredibly sweet cat#i talk to my baby brother all the time and he tells me he loves me and he’s graduating college soon and i’m so fucking proud#i wish i would’ve known how good it would all become#i wish i could’ve known#personal
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hermes-helpol · 1 month
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Sitting outside during a storm, watching, listening; enjoying the rain and the lightning and the thunder and thinking of Lord Zeus.
Thinking about his stories; what I know and how much I know I'm oblivious to. Wondering what I can learn from him. Reminding myself to research him later.
Thanking him for the storm. For every drop, every flash; every rumble.
Thunderstorms are something we have always adored both collectively with my system and together with our family/mother. But this one was truly magical because I got to experience it with Lord Zeus in mind.
I love religion 💜.
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starlooove · 8 days
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My fave thing about my vs is subtly changing them to look more and dress more like Johnny over time - give em a day where they go back to their og styles as like a push against it - and then have them settle in more
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toastsnaffler · 4 months
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oh wow just saw flatmate messaged saying another friend passed smth on like oh okay. I didn't realise he went too u didn't say. in fact none of u said anything to me so that's great
#he lives hours away thats a lot of travel just for drinks#when she asked me she said it was her + one other person. going out for drinks in evening.#but clearly she took the day off work bc ghosts dont do laundry. so it was a whole day trip. so why tell me it was just drinks#unless she just wanted a good excuse for me not to come. okay 👍#i cant even make myself mad abt it like fair enough man. i get it.#and if last weekend is anything to go off she probably wont ask me at all in the future#well as long as they have fun it doesnt matter i guess. im tired of feeling like im just intruding in everyones lives#and everyone fucking lying like what u say doesnt line up with how u act i can tell its not real im not that fucking stupid#ive dealt with this so many times before average autistic experience im tired of naively believing ppl and then the rug being pulled#sorry for being the way i am and for wanting things and for trying to take up space i give up its not worth it anyway#at least this is giving me smth to feel shit abt instead of just formless malaise. makes it easier to deal with that way#anyway. just need to get my shit enough together to leave the house by 3 so i can pick up this stuff for work#and i can do most of my other chores tmr so thats fine#i hate how much fucking time i waste feeling awful. no wonder other ppl have time to watch n read n create n whatever so much more than me#half of my fucking life is spent in my head trying and failing to emotionally regulate im so so sick of it#i wish i never had to think a single thought again and maybe id be happy#jesus fucking christ. well i need to leave my room soon bc i need to pee im not depressed enough to piss in a bucket just yet#hope i never get to that stage again amen uni was pretty fucking dire#.vent#hate weekends so fucking much what a waste of free time
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murobrown · 4 months
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#hello i just found out my dad might be getting another divorce and he's not telling me :))))#he might be already separated from his wife living back in my hometown with who knows who :))))))))#so he left a woman who he has cheated with on my mom and basically destroyed whole family :))))))))))))))#i don't have any reliable sources for this ans I can't ask him but it is eating me inside#and I had my suspicions since Christmas but I just thought they are having some tough period#so whenever I called him I tried to check of everything is okay and everything seemed okay#and I just hope they're still maybe just going through something but they will end up back together again#and i won't know because we don't talk about our problems in my family you need to be always happy#and god forbid you bother someone with your problems#i am sorry of this is too personal but it's making me freak out a little bit#i just can't stop thinking about it#and is it bad that I actually feel sad that I won't ever see his cats again if his wife keeps them?#ugh how the fuck can you divorce twice in your life?????#and does this mean that I also have some fucked up genes in me????#i was kinda hoping he would come to visit me for my birthday because I don't want to be alone but I doubt it will happen now#i just miss him and i want that he's hapy#okay that's enough i just needed to get this out of me#have a wonderful day everyone I'm going to take a shower because I ran 5km today so at least that's something positive
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the-trans-dragon · 1 year
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Hehehe >:3 got a kissie and some headpats from a pretty girl >:3 muahahahahahaha >:3
#sorenhoots#sometimes i remember that i am living the life that i ached for during lonely years#like i just get to wake up and live my gay little life??? kinda fucking awesome even if many other parts of life are very stressful#im so glad i met my wife who loves me for who i am 🥰🥰🥰🥰 and 😈😈😈 heheh then i met my other partner???? like. i thought my wife made me#the happiest i would ever be and then WOOSH i met ANOTHER person who makes me incredibly happy? i did not know the happiness could DOUBLE.#i figured it was like 0%-100% and my wife made me like 100% of my capacity for happiness and then its like 200% now and im realizing that my#capacity to experience joy and peace isnt static and frankly probably increases steadily over a lifetime as i grow and change and learn to#appreciate things more. anyways im in a content happy lil gay mood this morning :3#my partner got to visit us recently to help us get emotionally ready for some stressful stuff but now the most stressful parts are done and#now that the stress is fading i am finding so much happiness has been in my chest waiting to burst! it was sooo good to see my partner hehe#and the situation is even cuter because my wifes partner also came to visit and my wifes partner is my partners wife also so like. adorable#symmetry. my partner and my wifes partner have another partner and if you draw out a little diagram of us you will see it is shaped like a#house :3 a square with a triangle on top :3 hehe metamours everywhere :3 super super super wonderful metamours. its literally almost like a#fairy tale to have a polycule??? like?? im so excited to live somewhere that isnt like 9 hours from them. oh my god they also have a cat and#shes the cutest. me and my wife have a cute cat also and we are like 👀👀👀 tenatively anticipating that they will get along 👀👀👀 ive#specifically worked with my cat to help her know how to behave around other cats. my neighbor is retired and does TNR on the local strays#and they get attached to her and hang out in her backyard or her house lol like one snuck in and this was before they had any cats and they#didnt know he snuck in until he hopped onto her bf's chest at night to snuggle up. and hes a big cat and if you felt him drop onto your#chest in the pitch black of night you might absolutely mistake him for a racooon or possom or some other beast. anyways he sneaks into all#the houses down the street apparently and is just kinda like “the retired people down the street”'s cat lol. and daisy would hiss and yowl#out the window at him but i always tried to show her that he is friendly (and give her treats to attempt to tell her 'he isnt a threat. have#a snack. see? if he was a threat then we would not be having snacks.' and eventually he ran into us while i was letting her outside on her#harness and!!! i was absolutely ready to defend either of them from the t#other but they just cautiously sniffed each other and then laid down. it was fascinating to observe. daisy also responds really well yo#to meeting new people :3 though she proved me wrong by hiding from some maitenence ppl recently. but then she met my metamour and was pretty#much instantly like 'oh ok ur family? sounds gok#sounds good.' so thats cute and i hope if we end up in the same house with the other cat in the polci#polycule. well i hope they get along!!!#idk what we would do if they didnt. there are lots of other housing arrangements (like renting a duplex or next-door apartments or#something) but i want them to get along anyways :3 no matter what sort of living arragement works out best. i think theyd be good for each
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kanene-yaaay · 2 years
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Nothing better than to think about Mob Pyscho 100 and how it is a story about self acceptance and love and how you are able to impact everyone around you just like everyone can change you as well and then when I realize I am already crying about that awesome anime once again literally twice because it's *beautiful*
#spoilers#mp100 thoughts#it's just..... this anime is so much full of love#love for your friends that accepts you and make you discover new things to be happy about.#love for your brother that is there for you no matter what and that cares so much that it hurts him#love for your master that is silly and pretentious but that *cares* and guides and helps and listens and and and#love for your childhood crush because she was the one that knew all the sides of yourself and accepted them anyway#love for the spirit that is grumpy and sarcastic but that would do anything to help him when he needs#love for the club that still accepts and cheers him thro all the challenges again and again#love for his friend who once was an enemy but now is at his side at any moment that he needs for absolutely anything#there is just..... aaaarg! so much of it! for the people that attacked him but now is out there living their normal lifes!#and love for himself. that last part of him finally starting to accept his powers healed me in ways that I didn't even realize that I neeed#gosh#maybe I will rb this with all my rambles about the characters and especially Ritsu because they give me so much feelings#kanene being kanene#it's 12 am which means that is the perfect time to hug my sis while sobbing ny hearts content because a bunch of 2d characters made me#wonder about the beauty of live and the importance of giving yourself a chance to live#f u c k#and gosh the bean is like 14 years old calm down mah man calm down
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malusokay · 1 month
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5 Classics for girly girls 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
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Emily of New Moon
The bittersweet process of growing up and finding where you truly belong... The perfect read for the start of a new school year. After her father’s death, Emily Starr is sent to live with her snobbish relatives at New Moon farm. Thrust into an unfamiliar and often cold environment, Emily faces numerous challenges. However, as time passes, she begins to adapt and discovers the beauty in her surroundings. With the support of her new friends—Teddy, Perry, and Ilse—Emily not only finds solace but also discovers her own creative talents, helping her carve out a place for herself in this new chapter of her life.
“If it's IN you to climb you must -- there are those who MUST lift their eyes to the hills -- they can't breathe properly in the valleys.”
Jane Eyre
A true classic for all my fellow gothic-lit enthusiasts, Jane Eyre, reminds us that everyone deserves a love that consumes, challenges, and transforms the very core of your being, offering both profound joy and deep heartache (we love a good situationsship). Following Jane Eyre, an orphaned and mistreated girl who endures a harsh upbringing but grows into a strong, independent woman. As she takes a position as a governess at Thornfield Hall, she encounters the enigmatic Mr. Rochester, sparking a profound and tumultuous romance. Their intense connection is marred by secrets and personal demons, revealing the complexities of their relationship.
“Jane, be still; don't struggle so like a wild, frantic bird, that is rending its own plumage in its desperation." "I am no bird, and no net ensnares me; I am a free human being, with an independent will; which I now exert to leave you.”
The Secret Garden
Mary Lennox, a spoiled and neglected girl, is sent to live with her uncle after the death of her parents. Initially ill-tempered and withdrawn, Mary’s curiosity is sparked by rumours of a hidden, abandoned garden on the estate. As she explores and begins to restore this secret garden, she experiences a beautiful shift (glow-up era). The once gloomy and sickly Mary starts to bloom alongside the garden, rediscovering happiness, vibrancy, and a sense of belonging, making the story a heartwarming tale of growth and recovery.
“At first, people refuse to believe that a strange new thing can be done, then they begin to hope it can be done, then they see it can be done--then it is done, and all the world wonders why it was not done centuries ago.”
Pride and Prejudice
Truly a classic that has shaped my romantic expectations hahah... Elizabeth Bennet battles societal expectations and her own misjudgments in 19th-century England. When the aloof Mr Darcy (he'd totally be a ghoster in the 21st century just saying...) first crosses her path, their initial encounters are fraught with tension and misunderstanding. However, as Elizabeth delves deeper, she uncovers the complexities of Darcy’s character and her own heart.
“I could no longer help saying that I loved him. I loved him not only for his sake but for his own sake. I loved him because he was the only person who had ever really loved me for myself. I loved him because he had made me feel that I was worthy of being loved.”
The Little Prince
A young, otherworldly prince from a tiny planet travels across the universe, meeting various inhabitants and learning profound life lessons. His journey brings him to Earth, where he encounters a stranded pilot and shares his reflections on love, loss, and the essence of human connections. Through whimsical adventures and encounters, The Little Prince explores the importance of seeing with the heart rather than the eyes and reminds us of the value of friendship and innocence.
“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye. The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or touched; they are felt with the heart.”
you guys asked for more academia/book stuff so I thought this might be a nice start, especially since I know that many of you are just getting into classics; these are all very much suitable for beginners!! <3
love ya ・:*₊‧✩
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rajaagaza · 2 months
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🚨URGENT NEED🚨
Don't be afraid, my child!🥲
Hello, I am Rajaa from Gaza.
A mother of a child who has known nothing in his life except fear, hunger, deprivation, killing, and the sound of bombing.
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He has no fault and doesn't realize what is happening. He wakes up terrified from sleep and doesn't understand what is happening around him. He cries from the sounds and doesn't understand why.
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Every time I must not show my fear and laugh so that he doesn't startle. 🇵🇸❤️🍉
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We must every time reassure him and convince him that this is a game that requires laughter, but he laughs out of fear and anticipation, as if he feels that what we are experiencing can't be a source of happiness and laughter.🍉🫂
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The truth is that what We are experiencing something so horrific that it can't be described. We are unable to even express it. But the mind of my child will not comprehend all this cruelty and injustice.💔🩸
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Son you have been deprived of safety, tranquility, health care, food, water, and even clothes.😟💔
And yet, I will remain by your side, my beloved, and I will not leave you. 🫂🍉
Don't be afraid, my child. This world contains everything and its opposite.
There are good people, my son, who always strive for good.
We will definitely find someone to help us survive all of this We will find someone to support us to rebuild our dreams and our lives.. Only then will you realize how full of satisfying and wonderful things life is.. which I will not stop telling you about until you live them..
Help me get my son to safety and see him grow up in a place suitable for living as he deserves. Join me to find a safe life and a better future for him Our children deserve a normal life like all children in the world
Thank you 🇵🇸🍉
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neil-gaiman · 3 months
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hi neil. i've held off on writing this message for a bit because i didn't know if i could get it out or not.
i work in a senior healthcare facility. not a nurse or anything, i actually just serve food to the residents, but it's given me the ability to get to know a lot of the people that live there. because of this, i was able to befriend a wonderful lady named sally. she would always come talk to me while i served up the meals, and we'd have nice chats. she spent most of her time reading books, since she didn't like to do many of the activities with the other residents, and since she loved books with mystery and suspense, i loaned her my copy of american gods, thinking that she'd enjoy it. and she did! i loved it when she'd come talk to me about the chapter she'd just read, our little chats about wednesday, just everything. i was happy that she liked the book.
our chats kind of tapered off after awhile, and we didn't talk as much. she's had my book for well over a year now, which i hadn't minded, but she eventually started picking up our chats again, about the book. but she was talking about how she had just started reading it and that she was really interested in it so far. i came to realize some time later that sally was actually just finally showing signs of dementia, which was saddening for me to hear, but it's one of the heavy realities of working in a facility like this. she had always struggled with some memory and speech issues, but i'd always chalked it up to her older age.
anyway. i am saddened by this onset, but at the same time, i am also finding some strange comfort in knowing that she will come up to me at breakfast, wanting to talk to me about american gods, because she's forgotten that she's already read most of it, and she just reads the first few chapters over and over. she doesn't leave her room without it, she brings it to the table with her every day. when she leaves the facility with her family for an outing, she brings it with her. i am just. so comforted knowing that your book i loaned her a year ago is a source of joy and delight for her, and continues to be so over and over. i know i'll never get that book back, and i won't ever try to get it back from her, even if she stops reading it. i want her to keep it.
i now have a streak regarding losing my books that you've written, i'm two for two now, haha
idk. i'm just really kind of overwhelmed today by all the emotions surrounding it and i'm just happy that you wrote something that she likes so much, and that we talk about it even though she doesn't remember that we've talked about it a dozen times before. i love each and every chat with her so much, and i want to keep having them with her for as long as i can. thank you for your work.
Some of the happiest hours of my life were spent with a friend with advanced Parkinson's dementia, sitting on his porch with him, both of us reading. And he read the same few pages over and over and it was okay.
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chuluoyi · 8 months
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first ultrasound with gojo (love entries) headcanons?❤️
࿐ ࿔ 🕰️ 「 12:55 P.M 」
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*sigh* why am i so weak to domestic requests... this is just a little thing i wrote in one sitting while stalling my nanami fic (and after coming back from the company retreat!) sobs, i'm going back to it i promise!! :')) this loosely takes place after daddy-to-be <3
a part of gojo's love entries
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“now let us see…”
you were lying on the examination table as the ultrasound gel made contact with your still flat abdomen. the sheer coldness and the way the probe pressed hard on your skin made you wince a bit, until that discomfort was eased by a comforting squeeze of your hand, prompting you to turn your head towards the source.
your husband, gojo satoru, offered you a smile so warm it made everything else fade into the background. beyond his sunglasses was the way he always fondly looked at you, as if he was silently assuring you that he would be by your side every step of this journey.
you couldn't help but smile back at him.
“ah, here’s the baby,” your doctor gestured at the monochrome screen with a grin. “around five weeks now. it’s the size of a seed.”
a seed? your gaze fixed on the screen with a sense of wonder. honestly you couldn’t really pinpoint where your baby was, until you saw one dot that the doctor zoomed in.
and there it was—the tiny beginning of life. the product of you and your husband’s love, growing steadily inside you.
suddenly it felt so real that you were carrying a new life. your heart overflowed with warmth, swelling with emotion, and you struggled to hold back tears as your gaze shifted between the screen and satoru, who offered you a comforting pat on the head.
“hush,” he whispered softly, seemingly moved too after looking at the living testament of his baby on the screen. “don’t cry now, hmm?”
after seeing the sonogram and had it printed, both of you sat before the doctor as she instructed you to take things easy from now on, and through it all, satoru held your hand firmly in his, attentively listening to everything the doctor mentioned and even proactively asking questions in return.
“doc, she gets dizzy and nauseous easily, can you prescribe her something to make it bearable?”
“i can certainly prescribe some anti-sickness medication, but i highly recommend you to have plenty of rests and eat healthy food too to reduce morning sickness—”
“hmm, and can you recommend anything to improve sleep? she can have trouble sleeping too…”
honestly it touched you to see satoru picked up on these little things about you despite being away so often. only now did you realize that he had always been watching over you, without fail.
back at home, he sat you down on your bed, back to being a carefree clown who would draw laughs out of you.
“now, little mom,” he began, his lips already turning up into a grin as he took your hands in his, kneeling before you. “you need to listen to me very closely, okay?”
you snorted. “don't address me like that!”
“uh-oh, no squirming,” satoru warned playfully, pinching your cheeks, and you swatted his hand, holding back giggles.
oh my. just what a blissfully happy couple you were.
“first thing first, now you are to have lots of breaks and rest,” he declared, amusement melted a bit from his tone. “the doctor said so. it'll help with your nausea too. if you feel the slightest bit unwell, you have to go back and rest.”
you rolled your eyes. “yeah, yeah...”
“and no staying up late too,” he added, fixing his clear eyes on yours. “especially not for waiting for me to be home.”
that got you to clamp up. so he noticed it too, the way you would always wait for him, even at the cost of not sleeping at all. satoru never really said anything all this time, but now you knew, he was indeed worried.
once again, your chest burst with love and warmth. but still...
“can you promise me that?” satoru asked you gently, his smile still in place, but you knew the underlying command behind those words. “i'm coming back. always. i have everything i want here, with you. there's no way i'm not coming back.”
you hung onto his every word, and much like spellbound, you let go of everything and nodded.
“and now baby...”
he then shifted his focus to your tummy, gently brushing his fingers across it, and the gesture stirred something inside you, making you throb with emotion.
“you only have one job. grow big and healthy, and you can even bother mama sometimes! just don't make her too sick or i'll worry...”
somehow your vision blurred with tears, hearing how unusually earnest he was. “satoru, you're so silly.”
but as always, he would pick this moment to flip the switch, reverting back to his usual teasing.
“hmm, what's that? you're getting soft now, aren't you, mommy~?”
“...why do you have to sound like that? you're making it lewd on purpose!”
in this little world of love of yours, it was just you and him, along with the tales of your life together. you had weathered various moments side by side, and now, as you were embarking on another significant chapter with him, you were certain that everything would be alright.
satoru pulled you to the bed and smothered your head with kisses, trapping you between his strong arms. “hmm, comfy now?”
“mmm, yeah. keep cuddling me...”
and from his side, he was sure, that right now, everything had never been and felt so right than ever before—with the love of his life and future in his arms.
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thelov3lybookworm · 6 months
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As a slut for angst today “tolerate it” has been stuck on a loop and now I am imaging an angsty fic where Az just slowly begins to forget about reader and she threatens to leave but he doesn’t take her seriously and is so utterly destroyed when he comes back home and she’s gone…
Like I feel like it’s on brand with him and his duty to his job and whatnot. Plus the lyrics are so him coded “while you were out building worlds where was I” / “took this dagger in me and removed it” LIKE HELLO???
(But I also love a good happy ending so I feel like if azzy groveled hard enough… 👀)
Tolerate it.
Summary: She is fed up.
•○●⛦●○•
A/n: ehehehehehe angsttttt yummy yummyyyy
Enjoy!
•○🌑○•
Y/n laughed at Feyre's pathetic attempts at skipping the large puddle on the ground accumulated due to the rains that had Velaris freezing overnight.
Feyre failed miserably, her boots and leggings getting wet from the splash that signalled her downfall against the watery enemy of hers. But Feyre was not fazed. She simply laughed alongside Y/n, her eyes crinkling as the two of them made their way back to the river house.
It was visible already now, Y/n could even make out the grains in the wood of the door as it opened, and her brother in laws, along with her mate, spilled out.
Y/n could see from the corner of her eyes as her sister lit up at seeing her mate, her husband and the father of her child. The moment his eyes met her, she took off, her arms spread as she ran up to him and threw her arms around his neck. Rhysand did not hold back either, clutching Feyre to her chest with as much enthusiasm as she held him.
It made Y/n smile.
Y/n then glanced behind the embracing couple to her mate, the overwhelming urge to hug him too and to claim him in front of anyone watching making her start walking towards him without even realising.
Which was reckless, as the moment he realised she was walking towards him to hug him? He took a step back.
Y/n knew that he hated being affectionate in front of others, but this was cruel.
So to not get embarrassed by his rejection, Y/n turned swiftly towards Cassian, her other brother in law, who stood not too far from where Azriel did, and hugged him instead.
Cassian, Mother bless his heart, did not even question it.
He wrapped his arms around Y/n and literally lifted her off the ground, cackling when Y/n's fist made contact with his shoulder over and over again as she demanded to be put down.
Y/n had to stop herself from thinking back to that day. She did not want to relive the pain she had felt, the sadness and anger.
Y/n watched his eyes fluttering, wondering if he was dreaming. Wondering who he was dreaming about.
It definitely was not her, that was for sure.
Y/n, feeing a little sadness taking root in her heart, returned to the portrait in her hands, questioning if it would even be worth it finishing it up when he sure as hell wouldn't even acknowledge it. Or her.
Y/n glanced at the paint supplies she had placed on the coffee table next to her, having wanted to capture a moment of him letting his guard down, of him being vulnerable using her best paints, knowing he would not care.
She guessed living for as long as he had, life and the small things didn't matter as much anymore. Maybe that was why he loved to go on the missions Rhysand, Y/n's brother in law, gave him.
It probably gave him the thrill nothing else did anymore.
With Y/n's sister just having given birth to the starlight of the court, Rhys had become more and more protective, sending his brothers and anyone and everyone at his disposal to check and report about every trivial thing that made his primal mate and father side get protective.
Slowly, Y/n reached for the brush that rested in the cup half filled with coloured water, deciding to finish the half done portrait. If he did not care... she did not now what she would do then, but she did know she was tired of being tolerated by him.
But what could she even do? It was not like she could just up and leave.
Y/n blinked.
Or... could she?
Y/n shook her head, as if to dislodge the though, and with a sigh, she let herself get lost in the soft skill of painting her sister had taught her long ago, when staying up and huddling under worn blankets was the only thing bringing any warmth.
Trying not to think about the fact that the last time she remembered him caring for her, genuinely caring for her, was only when the two had been in their early stages of relation ship and the mating bond was a very new experience to a newly made fae Y/n, she continued using the soft and strong, long and short strokes to finish up her latest masterpiece.
Of course, Y/n never would call herself a creator of masterpieces, but any and all art that included her perfect mate was destined to be a masterpiece.
Time lost its meaning, and all that mattered was capturing the perfect angle for his eyes, nose, lips, shoulder.
Nothing existed but Y/n, her art, and her muse.
Nothing existed but the soft rise and fall of his back as he lay sprawled on his stomach, the effortless way his wings draped across the whole bed, taking up space three wingless fae could have slept in.
Where Y/n would have slept in, on days when everything had been filled with stars and dreams, wrapped under his warm wing like it were a living blanket.
When he pretended he was nothing, absolutely nothing but her mate. Her husband. Not a spymaster, not a shadowsinger, not a brother. Just her mate, her lover.
Those days were far gone now.
•○🌑○•
Despite the fact that she knew he would most definitely not care, Y/n was excited.
And that was downplaying what she felt.
The wait was killing her, the amount of adrenaline in her bloodstream making her want to jump around to get rid of the energy that made her shiver, her limbs going cold and warm at the same time. She had to push her fists together and shove them between her thighs to keep them from shaking, which did not help at all.
So Y/n waited, her body clenched in anticipation as she stared at the doorway that led into the living room, a big grin on her face.
She glanced once at the sketchpad in front of her on the table, admiring her artwork for a moment.
She never liked whatever she made, always feeling like it lacked something. So for her to be excited to show off her art to her mate was a huge indication to how much she loved the portrait.
The familiar scuff of worn boots drew Y/n's attention, and she shot to her feet, pressing her fists to the back of her thighs.
It had become a habit of Azriel's, to purposefully make some noise before he stepped in view so as not to startle her with his appearance.
The action melted Y/n's heart every single time.
He stepped into view, as ethereal as the day Y/n had first seen him as a human, just as beautiful as he had looked that day as he tried to get comfortable on the small chair in the manor on the other side of the wall, just as loveable as that day when she had ended up losing her heart to the low born fae that should have intimated her.
He was fumbling with his armor, making sure it was all secured properly before he left for whatever mission Rhys assigned him for that day.
He glanced up just as he walked past Y/n to the kitchen counter, a small smile gracing his face before his attention was again diverted.
Y/n tried not to deflate at his lack of enthusiasm.
"Good morning love. Look-"
"Good morning Y/n." He cut her off, his voice void of emotions, as if he was tired of saying the same thing every morning and wanted to get it over with. He didn't even glance at Y/n as he said it, and Y/n pretended not to notice that he used her name instead of whatever endearing name he would have picked before.
"I will be on a scouting trip to Illyria, and after I have a meeting and dinner scheduled with Rhys and Cass, so I will be late coming home. Don't wait up."
Y/n's smile faded. "Don't wait up or stay out of my way?"
Azriel froze. "What?"
Y/n released a humourless laugh. "Nothing. Go have fun."
Azriel turned, giving her a hard look. "You know I would rather stay at home with you."
Doubtful.
Y/n so badly wanted to say it to his face, but she did not want to fight with him so early in the morning, so she sighed, smiled and nodded.
He started walking towards the door, and despite her anger, Y/n walked forward to kiss his cheek.
She did not miss how he recoiled.
Y/n masked the hurt before he could see it, and he gave her an awkward smile before he maneuvered to walk around her, careful not to brush against her.
Y/n watched him walk away, staring hard at the door even long after he'd left.
She then glanced at the portrait she had abandoned on the table, and, her heart hardening, turned away.
She was tired of having her love be tolerated, and she would not have it be that way anymore.
Either he accept her love the way it was, loud and clear, or he go find someone else.
And so, she turned, walked up the stairs to the bedchambers she shared with Azriel, and began to turn it back into just his bedchambers.
She would no longer be tolerated only because some godly entity thought she and him would make great, powerful kids and tied them together with a string.
She deserved to be cherished.
•○🌑○•
Part 2
Taglist: @bubybubsters @eos-princess @nightless @harrystylesfan2686 @cassie6392 @kennedy-brooke @tele86 @miluiel1 @hnyclover @minnieoo @sidrapotter @piceous21 @mybestfriendmademe @saltedcoffeescotch @eve175
Azriel Taglist: @darthdumbasss @foreverrandomwritings @azrielsmate3 @celestialend
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