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whumble-beeee · 2 months

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The Man in the Sweater Vest

The (Un)Official Guide to Hero-Keeping | Cont'd from Part 7

Content: attempted noncon, threatened mouth whump, disabled whumpee, trans whumpee, scissors, tied up/handcuffs, noncon unshirtening, noncon touch, past captivity references, graphic threats, blood, crapton of whump. As a treat :)

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Excerpt from: The (Un)Official Guide to Hero-Keeping; a self-help guide for villains and bounty-hunters

[Inevitably, there will be disagreements on how you should treat your captured hero. One villain might want to just hold the hero hostage long enough to finish their dastardly plans. Another will want to break the hero’s will entirely! Or anything else in between!

But when working together with other villains, bounty hunters, henchmen, etc, it is crucial that everyone is on the same page about how your captured hero is to be treated, lest your hero end up with a few less limbs than you meant them too, or your months of breaking down the hero's fragile mind is undone by a single nice gesture.

Always communicate effectively, your hero will thank you for it (or curse the day you were born)!]

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Sweater-vest stumbled back, reeling from the punch and clutching his face before pulling his hands down and gawking at the blood staining his hands.

“STAY AWAY FROM ME!!” Stan screamed.

An intense elation washed through his chest despite the surprisingly sharp exploding pain that crackled up the very bones of his arm when he punched the man, and the now freshly ripped open scabs and bruises from where he’d forgotten to account for the handcuffs and yanked on them violently, streaming new ruby red over dried light brown that already carved down his arms;

Because he'd got him. He'd got him! Punched him, made him back off! Stan did that! He'd finally managed to actually do something about the atrocities being committed against him and it was so, so sweet.

Relatively short-lived, though.

Vaughn, the sweater vest man, started to giggle to himself as he wiped the blood streaming from his nose onto his sleeve. Elation gave way to tentative confusion. Then a sinister seed started to take root in Stan's gut, the roots already reaching out and tightening around his body.

“You-...” Vaughn giggled some more. “You– you think–?...”

He started fully laughing, speech overtaken by an apparent hilarity that Stan must’ve just been too shocked by the sudden mood change to understand. He was cackling. Then practically shrieking, crazy, loud, heaving laughs.

He must be crazy.

Insane.

Well and truly insane, the way he was shriek laughing into his shining red-stained hands.

His gaze snapped up to Stan, and Stan could practically hear the horror movie crackling effect with how fast it snapped up, crazy maniacal shudders still overtaking his body, piercing gaze turned wide, animalistic.

“You think you can HURT ME?! HURT ME?! AHAHAHAHA!!”

Suddenly Stan slammed into the wall, cuffed wrists pinned above his head, chest to chest with the crazy man and staring up into his crazy bloodshot eyes.

“You can't hurt me,” he growled into Stan’s ear through gritted teeth. ”I don't feel pain. I carved that weakness out a long time ago, my brain doesn’t register it anymore! And I did it so I could deal with horrible little brats like you–” he slammed Stan's wrists into the wall, “--however I see fit! So I could do whatever I wanted to them. So that even if they fight back, they always, always, always lose.”

He pulled back and leaned into Stan's face, staring the captive directly in his glaringly defiant, wide and shining eyes. Hot shaking breaths misted surprisingly minty breath onto Stan’s cheeks, nearly overpowered by the metallic tang of blood that still poured down his face.

“Always submit. Just like you're going to.”

Stan pulled down hard against Vaughn's grasp, struggling and wiggling and tugging and screaming and kicking and doing every single little thing he could to, if not escape, at least make this as difficult as possible.

“Get away from me!" He cried. "GET AWAY FROM ME, get OFF of me, I’m not gonna let you do this you sadist, you can’t do this to me!! LET GO–!”

A punch to the gut. Stan tried to double over and wheezed as much as he could with his arms pinned up, which delivered him right into another punch to the face.

Then something cool and sharp stabbed into the soft underside of his chin, straining his neck with how far his head pushed back into the wall.

“This is why I like to keep my victims gagged,” Vaughn gritted. “That bounty hunter of yours never does it, no matter how I tell him to. Always has to do stuff his own way, never listens. All he does is talk talk talk, always has a retort for everything. So defiant, and so is every single subject he brings in.”

A dull aching throb emanated from where Stan’s head pressed into the wall. Black spots dotted his vision.

“You–... y-you can't–”

The scissors pulled back and dove toward Stan's mouth, eliciting a loud cut-off scream of revolt as he cowered and squeezed his eyes shut from some vain, animalistic instinct to protect himself.

Then he pried open his eyes again, confused when no cutting metallic pain ripped through the fragile flesh of his face.

The handle of the scissors were fuzzy, too close for his eyes to focus.

They weren’t that far into his mouth.

Just enough that if Stan tried to close it, his teeth would clip on the tip of the metal blades instead.

The scissors lifted slowly, tapping on his top teeth, tilting his head up until he stared into Vaughn’s metallic blue eyes once more.

“I could always prep your throat with these if you like,” he drawled softly, letting go of Stan’s cuff chain and instead lightly grasping his thumb and forefinger under Stan’s chin, forcing his mouth open further. A small sob crackled out from Stan’s throat.

“It would be so easy… I could just–”

The scissors lurched further into Stan’s mouth, and Stan let out another involuntary squeak and an open-mouthed, unintelligible pleading of “no, no, no, no…” as tears started to sting at his eyes.

But he let him do it.

He even still held his arms up, because surely if he tried to fight back now, with the scissors in his mouth quite literally pinning him to the wall… He didn’t even want to think of the consequences.

“Careful, dropje. Wouldn’t want to cut yourself. Be quiet, be still, be good for me, right? You can be good for me? You can finally shut the hell up. No more fighting.”

He let go of Stan's chin and let his hands wander lower, caressing Stan’s sides, the curve of his waist, making his entire body tense and shudder. His breathing turning loud and shallow as he cringed away.

Vaughn just giggled.

“See? Isn’t this better? You’re not getting hurt, you’re doing what I say…” His fingers slipped under the waistband of Stan’s pants again. Slower this time. More deliberate.

It took all of Stan's willpower to not start hyperventilating at what he knew was about to happen. He knew. It was always this, wasn’t it?

Vaughn’s voice lowered as he leaned closer, pressing his body into Stan’s. He could feel the fibers of the stupid damn sweater vest against his stomach, deceptively soft, almost pleasant. The hard blade of the scissors tapped on the tip of his nose. “Because you physically have no other–”

BANG!!

Stan screamed.

Vaughn screamed.

The ghost of the gunshot echoed off the cinderblock walls.

Vaughn also nearly fell backward, pushing off of Stan just in time for Stan to fall to the floor in a duck-and-cover position and pray to whatever gods would listen that his last day on earth wouldn't have been spent dealing with two of the worst people he'd ever had the displeasure of being kidnapped by.

Wait, scratch that, his knee reminded him. He'd had worse.

His heart threatened to jump out of his chest completely, but he finally realized that in fact, he was still alive. So he opened his eyes to what he never thought to be one of the most beautiful sights in the world;

Deeby.

Gun pointed to the sky and streaming a light grey smoke into a small puff of explosion that hadn't had time yet to dissipate.

“What in the ever-loving SHIT are you doing?!” he shouted.

He was completely maskless, face now on full display, fiery eyes matching his equally fiery sneer. The sudden absence of the mask almost scared Stan more than the gunshot, the sight making his heart beat in his throat.

Then, for just a split second, Deeby's enraged eyes met Stan's stare. His eyes scanned down his body, looking him up and down, his face changing ever so slightly when his gaze caught in Stan’s chest. A slight crinkle of the eyebrows, a small tilt of the head. Then his eyes widened in some sort of realization, and Stan felt his heart turn to ice.

Recognition.

No.

He couldn't have realized who he was.

Just because of the binder?!

Stan choked on his own throat as the collar suddenly constricted once more and he was dragged violently forward to his knees.

“Your fucking dog punched me in the face!” Vaughn shouted, jangling Stan around enough that he had to grab the collar just to gain back his breath.

“Just because–!”

Vaughn jolted Stan's collar back hard and cut him off with a violent gag.

“I was disciplining him.” Vaughn narrowed his eyes at the mercenary. “Like we're supposed to.”

Deeby’s jaw set. And still, he managed to find a slight smug smile within his fury. “That why your face is gushing blood, then? Disciplined him too hard?”

Stan didn't even realize when they started, but tears were practically streaming down his cheeks now, chest heaving in panic. “Deeby, Deeby, he was gonna–”

“Shut up!”

A kick this time, straight to the back of his spine, and Stan's throat strained hard into the collar before breaking free of Vaughn's grasp and nearly face-planting into cold concrete. He scrambled to get up, but the same foot planted on his back and slammed his chest right back to the floor, grinding the heel of its shoe into the captive’s spine. Stan clutched at the ground, screams barely bit back by force of sheer willpower.

“Christ, man! Stop it, get off!” Deeby yelled with uncharacteristic urgency.

The force pinning him down suddenly released, followed by the scattered footfalls of someone catching themself from nearly falling over.

Stan just lay there limp. Heaving and shivering. He couldn't move. His limbs felt like heavyweights, the world tilted on it’s axis, and he was sure that if he lifted his head up, he would lose every last morsel of that protein bar he'd shoved down earlier.

But at least now no one was methodically turning him into a fine red mist anymore.

Deeby stood between the two of them like an impenetrable stone wall, hand resting on the unlatched holster of his gun and pointedly ignoring Vaughn’s stuttering disbelief as he patted at the pockets of his jacket, pulling various probably very sharp things out and shoving them into his pants pockets.

Protecting him.

“You– You just–...” Vaughn finally composed himself. “You pushed me off! You're saving him? He needs to be taught a lesson!”

Stan tried to push up despite the dizziness. “Only–... D-Deeby, he was trying–”

“Shut up, Stan, I know, let me handle it! Here.” Deeby slid his jacket off and dropped it practically on top of his captive’s head, never once letting his gaze slip from Vaughn. Stan shakily pulled the brown leather of the jacket over his shoulders before he had time to think better of it, doing his best to just enjoy the show and not think about the implications of what was currently happening.

“Because he wouldn't let you put your dick in him without a fight, right?” The bounty hunter said sarcastically. “Or– or– or because he wasn’t gonna let you mouth-gore him without complaint? Let you ‘teach him a lesson?’ Yeah, I am stopping you. Piece of shit.” The bounty hunter grabbed the scissors off the floor where they landed when Vaughn dropped them after the gunshot. Then he used them to point sharply at the door.

“Get out.”

Vaughn scoffed and melodramatically rolled his eyes.

“You got the message from Lana then? Is that why you're acting like such a belligerent wittle babeee?” Vaughn posited in his most obnoxious baby voice.

Deeby bristled. Stan could've sworn for a moment he could see the man shaking.

“Yes,” he said, slowly. “I talked to Lana. Your useless job is done. You can go back to being an even more useless sidepiece now.”

Vaughn’s shoulders tensed, and he laughed.

“Good! And I’ll make sure to tell Lana all about you taking the side of the disobedient dog of a test subject–”

“Yeah, go cry to your girlfriend about it, he's under my jurisdiction and I'm not gonna let you fuck that up because you feel the need to live out your perverse power fantasy with the helpless people you kidnap and torture. As if it isn’t torture enough to have to be in the same room with you at all.”

Vaughn clenched his fists at his side and forced on the worst imitation of a smile Stan had ever borne witness to.

“You better watch your tone, Deathberry,” he said, sickly sweet voice doing nothing to mask the hissing rage. “I could have you in the same spot as him in ten seconds. Don't ever–” he jabbed Deeby in the chest. “–forget that. You're only allowed to be out here roaming around with your fancy gun and your fancy cowboy boots because you're useful, otherwise you'd be locked up with the rest–”

Vaughn had just started to reach for the holster on Deeby's belt when, faster than Stan could perceive, a flurry of movement between the two men, a cry of surprised fear, the shuffling of feet and spinning of bodies and suddenly Vaughn was pinned back first to Deeby's chest, a wire that Deeby pulled from somewhere stretched taut between his fists and pressing a hard line directly under into the skin of Vaughn's throat.

Vaughn's hands quickly flew up to the wire to try and pull it off his throat, then just as quickly let go when he realized the wire would sooner cut through his hands before it would be pried off.

Stan couldn't help but stare.

“You're just about at the end of my rope, Verhulst,” Deeby growled, accent fully presiding now as he stepped backward and pulled Vaughn toward the door. “Don't you ever put your filthy hands on my gun.”

A slight rasp to Vaughn's voice was the only thing that denoted anything was amiss. “You sure this is about the gun, Deebs? Sure you're not taking your frustrations at Lana out on me?”

“Trust me, if I was takin’ my frustrations at Lana out on you, bud, you'd be dead.”

Vaughn's eyes shot to Stan, and his smile broadened.

“Ohhhh, I see. So what then, you are falling for the captive? I'm sure Lana would love to hear about how you're going soft, how you miss her, and how spectacularly you're failing at finding someone better so you have to–”

A small gurk finding its way from Vaughn's throat as he was pulled to a sudden stop.

“You know what, maybe I am. And maybe you should use your mouth to do something not completely useless for once.” He spun the both of them around to face Stan again.

“Apologize to ‘im.”

What?

Vaughn stared at Stan, apparently more stunned by the notion of apologizing than the motion of having a garot wire to his throat. Stan… honestly had to agree.

“Come again?”

“Apologize to Stan. For tryin’ to rape him. It's the least you could do.”

“You want me to… apologize?? To the test subject? You really are losing it, Deathberry, let me go.”

The wire dug into his throat more. “Say sorry, doctor.”

Vaughn glared at Stan. Stan glared back as well as he could.

“I can't feel the pain of this, you know,” Vaughn's voice came, even raspier. “You're not doing anything.”

“You can still bleed out from a slit throat. Still drown to death in your own blood as it slowly fills your lungs,” Deeby dismissed lightly. “Still bleed out. Very quickly. I wonder what would happen if I hit your carotid–

“And I wonder how Lana would feel about you slitting her head scientist and boyfriend’s throat.”

“Probably call you a little bitch boy for invoking her name every time you need to defend yourself like a spoiled toddler ‘steada bein’ a man about it and defending yourself. Or maybe not. You’d never know, you’d be dead.”

“You wouldn't–”

Deeby twitched the wire across Vaughn's throat and a line of red bloomed across the light tan of his neck. Vaughn's face grew just a little bit paler. He brought his hands up to graze across the wire and felt the warm wetness smear across his fingertips.

“Apologize.” Deeby growled. “Now.”

Vaughn's eyes flitted back to Stan, fully appraising the wonderfully wide-eyed mess he'd had pinned against the wall only moments before.

He narrowed his eyes.

Took a deep breath.

Stared daggers directly into Stan's soul.

“Sorry.”

Oh you bastard.

“Go jump off a cliff!” Stan yelled, erratically reaching into the jacket pocket he'd seen Deeby pull the protein bar out of earlier and luckily finding many more, one of which was immediately thrown directly at Vaughn. He couldn't even attempt to dodge it, and it hit him directly in the chest.

The mercenary let out a singular loud laugh and spun Vaughn back around, letting the wire retract into what Stan now realized was a little housing box on his weird arm sleeve thing and shoving Vaughn at the door as hard as he could.

“Guess he doesn't forgive you. Better luck next time!” he laughed. Stan genuinely thought (and hoped) Sweater-vest would fall flat on his face, but he managed to grab the door and right himself before that happened. Shame.

“Now get out.” Deeby said.

Vaughn glared with a literal snarl, jaw half a second away from cracking in two. Right before he took a slow, deep breath and reset his features to a forced neutral. Then an easy smile. “As you wish, my liege.”

He bowed exaggeratedly low in a show of mock respect, retrieving his scissors from the ground in a surprisingly graceful sweeping motion as he went. Deeby just rolled his eyes.

“Oh, and Stanny?” He drawled, peeking back from the door as he left and pointing his scissors directly at Stan's face with a flourish. “I look forward to seeing you soon~.”

“Get outta here!” Deeby yelled with a threatening stomp toward the door, at the same time Stan stuttered out a very surprised and agitated “In hell!”

The door slammed shut.

Stan could swear he could still hear Vaughn's deranged laugh echoing through the room even as an eerie silence fell over them.

He was finally gone. Finally.

See you soon.

He didn't completely understand why his breath continued to quicken. He'd won that encounter, right? Or… well, Deeby had. But still.

I look forward to seeing you soon.

He felt dizzy. More than the concussion could have caused. This was different, made him feel like he was suffocating, even though Vaughn was no longer here to strain the collar against his throat. Yet he could still feel the knuckles digging into the back of his neck.

I look forward to seeing you soon. In hell.

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#whump #heroes and villains #whump writing #whumper #whumpee #hero whump #defiant whumpee #kidnapping whump #captivity whump #trans whumpee #disabled whumpee #(un)official guide #attempted noncon #noncon undressing #IT'S BACK BABYYYY #GAH I've been so excited to post this #I missed this so much #extra long and extra whumpy for all your waiting #whos idea was it to let me go on an accidental month long hiatus #WHO WAS IT #anyway I'm going into tech week irl for the musical i'm in #so I might not get to the next chapter next weekend #I'll definitely try to tho #I genuinely missed writing and posting this story too. I've got so much more of it to tell #anyway I hope you like this chapter it was a bitch to wring it out of me but I did it #and its glorious #Also vaughn is such a cringefail I love him so much #and we've got some secret hidden Deeby lore sprinkled in there!#making this like an easter egg hunt #did you find it?

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matrixbearer2024 · 3 months

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Okay okay, hear me out! Vox POV of the "Get Off My Screen" series with Velvette or Valentino finding out about collage reader.

How would that go? Would Vox even tell us that they know? What would those two think of Vox hiding this from them? "You mean to tell me, you accidentally found a way to commune with the world of the living MONTHS AGO, AND DIDN'T TELL US?!" - Val or Vel (not shipping reader with those two tho, just Val and Vel finding out about Vox's crush on a human (Valentino being pissy about it))

Oops, Guess I Spilled The Tea

Vox x CollegeStudent!Reader

A/N: Wowowowow I have so many filler episodes now ahdosndkaks the direct continuation is actually finished and I'll probably post it right after I finish the interludes. Even if I'm working on the finale, if you guys come up with any ideas or suggestions still feel free to drop them in and I'll write out the scenario! Whether it's before Reader's death or after, go on and drop the idea in my inbox! After all, what's a good story without the fun content? As always, happy reading and I hope you all enjoy this installment!

A/N: While I initially wanted this to be more comedic and lighthearted, I don't think Vox would be taking it that way by the time this confrontation happens. He and dear Reader have been chatting together for a little over a year and a half by now, so while he has loyalties to the Vees- he's probably a protective mess all the more since he'd been slowly catching feelings too.

Waking up that day, Vox grunted when he realized it was his phone buzzing to life that roused him.

Ughh... wasn't his daily alarm for a few more minutes?

Sitting up and stretching, he sleepily grabbed his phone to check who'd want to bother him so early in the day.

Only to end up with a dopey smile on his face when he realized it was just you.

Somehow, you'd actually risen earlier than him this time.

"Wakey wakey eggs and bakey you workaholic picturebox!"

That was rare, he knew you were the type to have a million alarms because the first one wouldn't be enough to get your butt out of bed.

Well, he probably wouldn't want to get up either if it was waking up to you.

Wait-

What?

What the fuck.

Vox shook his head, woah... okay- maybe he wasn't quite awake yet.

"Well aren't you just a ray of sunshine, what's got you so cheery this hellish morning?"

He replied back with a waving emoji of himself, taking his phone with him as he left his bedroom to go and make a cup of coffee.

Unlike you, who for whatever reason he couldn't understand-

Preferred tea.

He chuckled remembering how that conversation went.

"Ehhh??? You like drinking your coffee black? Remind me never to share a morning drink with you."

"Oh really, what's your drink of choice then? Can't be much better."

"I like drinking tea thank you very much, it's healthier too from what I've heard."

"Ewww, leaf water."

"Ewww, bean juice."

A fond smile unconsciously wormed onto his screen as he turned on the coffee machine.

"Bean juice... that's so fucking stupid."

Though as quickly as his smile appeared, Vox replaced it with a poker face when his acquaintances came into the room.

Velvette was expectedly on her phone and Valentino was just dragging himself to the breakfast table.

His good mood would've just shattered had his phone not buzzed again and taken his attention.

You sent him a selfie of you on the way to university, the morning sun lighting up your face and your surroundings.

Not to mention the genuinely cheerful expression you wore.

Vox didn't really remember much about the mornings from when he was alive.

After all, it was a long time ago.

But this... seeing your picture-

That made the overlord think he'd crutially missed something when he was alive.

His fans whirred louder as he stared at your picture-

Were you always that pretty?

Though he was quick to click off it when the coffee machine beeped loudly, reminding him it was done.

"It's amazing outside! Seriously dude, if you weren't all dead and everything you'd probably enjoy the weather today."

He slowly sipped his coffee while typing back a reply with his free hand.

"Maybe? I'm not really a morning person, you know I get up just because I have to."

"Well who knows, it's not like we can find out now anyway. Anyhowww, I hope your day goes well! I know it rarely does with Valentino's tantrums and Alastor screwing up your stuff but still!"

"Forever the optimist huh?"

"Nah, I just think today would go great for both of us. Call it a hunch."

Vox just rolled his eyes before putting the phone down.

He was thankful he'd been drinking coffee, otherwise there was no way he could conceal the grin that threatened to break out on his face.

Though, what he hadn't expected were the other two Vees to be staring at him like he'd grown three heads.

He glanced between them and suspiciously raised an eyebrow.

What was going on in their minds?

"Vox, who the hell were you on the phone with?"

Velvette spoke first, crossing her arms and staring at the overlord in question with narrowed eyes.

Did she wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?

Vox didn't bother answering her question, just continuing to drink his coffee.

"Oh come on Voxy~ you haven't been spending much time with me either~"

Next came Valentino's whining, stretching along of his hands to sensually stroke his colleague's arm.

To which Vox just pulled away from the moth's grasp and made an odd expression.

The other two Vees knew what that was.

Disgust and annoyance.

It's never happened before to Vox's knowledge-

It's never happened that Valentino's hands on him just felt so... wrong.

Especially when the pimp overlord used to warm his bed or even take him for a rough night to forget the day's stresses and problems.

Nights that Vox had completely forgotten over the course of time he'd been chatting with you.

Nights that became less and less of an occurrence when your friendship blossomed.

All to the point they'd stopped entirely.

It was a subconscious decision, a bad habit he didn't notice that changed until today.

Of course- his reaction didn't sit well with the moth.

"You fucking asshole! Who the hell is it Vox?! Have you been fucking another whore behind my back?!"

Vox felt his blood boil, he didn't know even know why-

Why he felt so... angry for you.

Angry that Valentino thought you were just another fling.

Angry that you'd been disrespected and called a "whore".

He let out a frustrated sigh and put his coffee mug down.

So much for having a pleasant morning like you'd hoped for him.

"I don't owe either of you an explanation. I don't need to justify why I've been doing the things I have nor do I need to always tell you guys what I'm doing."

Vox glared at both his colleagues, the words ended up spilling from his mouth before he could stop them.

He didn't know why he suddenly felt protective of you, even when he knew neither Valentino or Velvette could capitalize on your peculiar situation without his help anyway.

Not that they'd want to.

You weren't anything special to them.

Not a person of power, influence or even wealth.

You were just you.

A person who was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Or well, by conventional standards.

You always told Vox you didn't think so, sometimes even going as far to call his company a blessing in disguise.

Ha, as if.

"It's nothing big anyways, you're just making a fuss."

Valentino slammed his fist on the table when Vox brushed him off.

Did he fucking think he was better than them or something?!

Tensions rose high in the room, until the familiar sound of a phone buzzing caught the attention of all three.

It wasn't Velvette.

It wasn't Valentino either.

Which only left Vox.

The technology overlord sprung up from his chair to grab the device which was just nonchalantly resting on the table.

But he wasn't quite fast enough.

Velvette swiped the device before he could grab it and unlocked the device.

Of course she'd know all the passwords, who do you think managed all the Vees social media accounts?

Though, what she saw nearly made her drop the phone.

"You've been talking to a LIVING person this entire time and you hadn't told us?! How long has this been going on for Vox?!"

Velvette screeched, causing the overlord in question to cringe from her tone.

Blegh... she was like a haughty child.

Valentino's reaction wasn't any better, ripping the phone out of Vel's hands and just continuing to yell at Vox.

At this point, he'd just turned his hearing sensitivity all the way down.

At any rate, his day was pretty much ruined already thanks to them sticking their noses in his business.

"'Professor's being a bitch again, how's your day been going?' Vox who the fuck is this?!"

"Just someone who got caught in the wrong place at the wrong time, nothing special."

"Uh huh, you wouldn't be so protective if they weren't special to you."

Valentino was about to type out an angry reply to you before the phone in his hand erupted into sparks and frayed wires.

Vox didn't want to resort to it, but he could always just get a replacement phone.

Better than you possibly getting the wrong idea.

Even if he had to explain later on that his colleagues were not really happy that he'd hid this situation from them.

"We will continue this conversation later, I have a broadcast in ten minutes and I cannot be fucking late."

With that, he'd left both Velvette and Valentino irritated and angry with him beyond belief.

Stepping back into his bedroom, Vox leaned back against the closed door with a sigh.

Just a year ago and he would have thought nothing of your situation.

He wouldn't have cared if his colleagues found out-

Hell, he would've probably encouraged them to bother and annoy you.

If they even took advantage, he wouldn't have batted an eye.

But now...

Vox rubbed a clawed hand over his screen.

What in Lucifer's name was fucking wrong with him?

A/N: 👀 Voxy is just confused and stressed, the story can't all be sunshine and rainbows but this isn't exactly angst? All this drama while our dear (Y/N) is just going about her day HAHAHAHAHA- So here have some tension on a plate while I go back to making more lighthearted stuff :)

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin vox #vox x reader #hazbin hotel vox x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #vox #hazbin vox x reader #vox x you #Get Off My Screen Series

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fuckyeahisawthat · 2 months

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thank you so much for that excellent chani post. i've seen some annoying takes on twitter about how not making her totally devoted and subservient to paul makes her 'unlikeable' and i'm like. buddy. i think that speaks more to how you see women. than anything about her. this chani is very dynamic and interesting to me.

i'll be honest and say i've not read the books. this is me speaking from what i've seen of summaries, but i think giving her a real cause to fight for yet also genuinely loving paul gives her an interesting struggle, and also plays into how the portrayal of the fremen (seems to me to be) more diverse and nuanced. as in, the fremen themselves seem to have more of a push-and-pull to them. the clarification of how different fremen believe differently (the south being more fundamentalist) is a very important thing to include in a movie where you can run into the danger of saying that all adherents to a foreign, islam-adjacent (in coding) religion are all fundamentalists. that can (in less nuanced hands) be a pretty irresponsible thing. so showing that there's also more secular/pragmatic/less dogmatic sectors of the culture seems a pretty good counterweight.

so yeah. this is how i processed it as a movie-goer. and having chani represent that aspect (believing in people over prophecy, action over religion) and having stilgar as the humanized face of the southern peoples (showing that yknow, regardless of being fundamenist beliefs, theyre still PEOPLE with the capacity for love, friendship, honor) makes total logical sense. you're not just "telling" us that there's different aspects to fremen culture, you're SHOWING us by showing different characters who represent those aspects, without demonizing either or turning either into a one-note stereotype.

Thank you! I'm not someone who was a long-term fan of the books before the movie came out (I tried reading Dune as a teenager when I was reading a lot of classic sci-fi but found it too boring) but I did read Dune and Dune Messiah after the first movie came out, both because I wanted to know what happened next and because I wanted to have an opinion on how the movies worked as adaptations.

(book and movie spoilers below and also I basically ended up writing a whole essay in response to this)

My single biggest frustration with the book is that after they arrive at Sietch Tabr and Jessica drinks the Water of Life and becomes Reverend Mother...the book up and skips two years of the story and when we next see Paul he's already got Fremen followers who are ready to die for him and he's in an established relationship with Chani. Oh I was SO MAD when I got to this part. I was like FRANK. FRANK!!!! Did you seriously just skip two years of the most interesting part of your own story???

The thing is, even though I know that Frank Herbert's intention was to write a critique of the idea that oppressed people need an enlightened external (white) savior to liberate them...if you don't provide an alternate explanation for what's happening then you end up falling into some Orientalist tropes anyway. And because, in the book, we don't see the process of how your average background fedaykin comes to trust Paul as a military and political leader, there is nothing in the text to counter the idea that the Fremen are a bunch of unquestioning religious fanatics easily swayed to do violence by belief in a prophecy.

My second biggest frustration with the book is that we're given no reason at all why Chani would fall in love with Paul. While she has some memorable scenes, she doesn't have a lot to do as a character in the book, and she's missing from a whole chunk of the end...because she's in the south...because she and Paul have a baby, Leto II, who's then killed off-page when the sardaukar attack the south. (I'm honestly really glad they cut this from the film, because it never seemed to be given the narrative weight it deserved in the book.)

So you can imagine how happy I was when the Villeneuve movies figured out how to address both these frustrations by tying them together. The fedaykin don't just blindly accept Paul because of some prophecy. They come to trust him because he proves himself as a fighter, and because he starts out from a place of genuine solidarity and humility--which it is possible for him to do because he has no structural power over them at that point. And Chani falls in love with him for the same reason, in that heady environment of fighting side by side for a political cause, and maybe for the first time in a while starting to believe that you can win.

I think the Villeneuve movies improve a lot on what's in the book in terms of how the Fremen are portrayed...when we're with the fedaykin and/or Chani and Stilgar. There we see political debates and discussion and the fact that not all the Fremen think the same way. And we also see little humanizing moments of folks just hanging out, celebrating after a victory in battle and just shooting the shit and being friends.

I do wish the movie had extended this to more parts of Fremen society. If there's one thing I could have added, it would be seeing more of daily life in Sietch Tabr. It makes sense that when we're seeing things from Jessica's POV, she is more distant from and suspicious of the Fremen, seeing them as a force to be manipulated, but I wish we had even one or two scenes of people just being people in the sietch. It felt kind of weirdly empty and not particularly lived-in as a place, and I think they could've easily countered this, with scenes from Chani, Stilgar or Paul's POV, and that would have made it hit even harder when the sietch is attacked.

If there were two things I could have added, I wanted more exploration of the people of the south. Why are they more fundamentalist than the Fremen who live in the north? (We get one line about how "nothing can survive [in the south] without faith" but I wanted more than that.) While I think the movie did a fantastic job of humanizing and differentiating the Fremen we see around Paul, when we get to the south it does backslide a little into "undifferentiated mass of fanatics." Surely the people of the south also have some diversity of political views.

I think there are some interesting threads they could have pulled on in terms of how proximity to direct colonial violence shapes people's ideology. Sietch Tabr is one of the closest Fremen communities to Arrakeen, the seat of colonial control. They have probably had to mount some kind of armed resistance for generations just to keep from being wiped out. I can see that producing skepticism of the prophecy ("well I can't sit around waiting for a messiah but I do have this rocket launcher") as well as resentment at the idea of someone swooping in and taking credit for a struggle that you've put your life on the line for, and probably a lot of people you know have died for. There seem to be some generational differences, too, where young people of Chani's generation put less stock in the prophecy, while the true believers are mostly older. I can see faith in the prophecy coming out of despair--when you've been fighting for decades with no change, maybe you draw the conclusion that only an outside power coming to your aid will make a difference. While the people of the south are still under colonial rule, maybe being generally outside the reach of direct Harkonnen violence (the Harkonnens don't even know they're there) makes the concepts of both oppression and liberation feel more abstract and more receptive to being filled in with Bene Gesserit mysticism. It seems absurd to want more from a movie that's nearly three hours long already...but I wanted more of this.

Still, I do think they managed to improve on a lot of things that frustrated me or are simply dated about the book, while keeping the political thriller/war drama/epic tragedy elements that I think are the heart of the story, and in some cases drawing them out more clearly and effectively than the book did. The best kind of book-to-film adaptation imo is one that has a strong point of view in terms of what the story is About, on a large-scale thematic level, and is not afraid to change individual elements of canon in service of telling that story the most effective way possible in a cinematic medium. While there are always things I want more of, I feel like Denis Villeneuve really, really understood the assignment in terms of the overarching themes of the the story and he delivered so fucking well.

#dune #dune spoilers #dune part two #dune part 2 #dune 2021 #dune books #chani kynes #asks answered

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randomfandomblabdom · 11 months

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I really need to vent about how much I like Cal and Merrin's dynamic in Jedi: Survivor cause they've quickly become probably my favorite canon pairing in the franchise.

I absolutely love that this relationship is built on the basis of friendship, respect, and a genuine mutual understanding of each other. From gameplay comments and conversations, Cal is very clearly so enamored with Merrin and literally everything about her. I know it's become a bit of a joke how clearly into her he is but he just thinks she's the most incredible being in the entire galaxy and it's honestly the sweetest thing. The writers could have very easily made his connection to Merrin a weakness or had it where it made his struggle with the darkness harder but I adore that they allowed him to be completely smitten with her and presented it as a strength. It's refreshing not only in Star Wars but in media in general, at least in my opinion. Love being presented as a positive asset is something so deeply missing in media nowadays - especially romantic love. Far too often in this day and age, love is presented as a weakness or something that will only bring you down, so I respect the fuck out of this writing.

Oops, this got really, really long so I'm putting the rest under a cut. It's kind of spitfire, so I apologize if it feels random.

I love how their first kiss is Merrin basically making a split-second decision where she realizes she doesn't want to die without kissing him at least once even if it runs the risk of making things awkward should they survive. Is it cliche as fuck? Absolutely, but it works so well in this instance. Cal being so dumbfounded, gawking at her like a fish, trying to process what the hell just happened that BD has to remind him they're literally about to die is the best thing too.

I appreciate that Cal is so obviously hesitant about giving into any sort of romantic feelings for Merrin because, of course, he would be due to his upbringing. He's pushing so hard against it to the point that he's even completely reluctant to so much as discuss it with Bode when they're on the Lucrehulk. Personally, I don't think Cal is oblivious to their potential feelings for each other. I've never been a huge fan of treating Cal as completely naive. He still might be a bit emotionally stunted, sure but he's lived 10 years outside of the Jedi Order at this point. I think he's hesitant to talk about it because first of all, it's really none of Bode's business but also, if he talks about it, he has to admit it, and if he admits it, that makes it real, and if it's real... well fuck, now he has to do something about it either way which is exactly what he's trying to avoid. I think he's trying to stay as neutral about it as he can until he gets to a point in the story/his arc where he decides he actually wants or feels ready to make a decision. Bode almost gets it out of him too before they're interrupted. The progression of Bode's questioning during that mission is something I actually find really interesting but that's a different topic.

Many people have pointed this out but Cal smiling so brightly while Merrin is clearly freaking the fuck out of Bode is just the cutest thing. Not only because he finds such humor in her scaring the shit out of people for fun when he of all people knows it's a running joke but he also goes along with the joke any chance he gets. He does this even when she's not around. People will be freaked out by her and he still plays along and it's not even like, "Yeah, I know, she's fucking scary bro," it's more like, "Yeah, I know, she can wake the dead, isn't it amazing how scary she is!" Someone else already pointed this out in another post but that feels almost more intimate than any kiss they share. His attraction to her encompasses all sides of her including those that many people find incredibly terrifying and I find that so endearing, he wouldn't ask her to change for anything. He's the only person who genuinely isn't freaked out by her in the slightest but not only that, he finds that side of her to be so incredible. Also, Cal being so blase with Bode about his obvious attraction to Merrin a mission prior and then having the most blatant sexual tension with her in front of Bode in the next scene is peak comedy, I don't care what anybody says. Like, Cal, honey, you just spent the entire previous mission trying to convince Bode (and yourself) there's nothing there and/or you're not pursuing it, so you're not doing yourself any favors by looking at her like that, standing that close to her, and speaking to her with the cadence of a lover bro.

I love that the second Cal walks onto the Mantis after killing Rayvis, she instantaneously picks up on the fact that something's wrong. Literally instantaneously. You can see her face drop the moment she sees him. She just knows something happened. Her ability to read him insanely well is something that is introduced very early on in the game, most noticeably in the campfire scene, and it stays consistent over the course of the story. The following conversation they have is honestly one of the best moments between them in the entire game. It's this type of conversation I've been wanting to see with a Jedi and their potential lover since Revenge of the Sith. He is so open with her even in a somewhat roundabout way about his genuine fear of losing himself and while the conversation is not explicitly about their relationship, the implication is still there and she 100% picks up on it, especially since he wonders aloud why Santari didn't see the change in Dagan before it was too late. Instead of shaming him for his reservations or calling it ridiculous or anything else she could have said at this moment, she instead decides to possibly help curb those fears and give him some comfort regarding it. She goes on to basically tell him in so few words she knows what she's signing up for and is willing to cross those bridges with him if they come. It's a great difference between Cal and Dagan. Though it's never outright stated that Dagan and Santari were in love, I feel like it's... pretty heavily implied, or at least he was definitely in love with her (was I the only one who read it that way??) but whereas Dagan demands that Santari talk him away from the darkness and seems to almost expect her to, Merrin herself plainly offers to do it with no prodding on Cal's part. It doesn't seem to be a burden Cal wanted to put on her, not something he was inherently expecting of her but she willingly offers, it is her choice, she wants to carry that burden with him. While she does seem maybe slightly annoyed by his hesitancy regarding their relationship to each other, she is also so incredibly patient with him while he's stewing over what he wants to do. It's beautiful. As a side note, "A shared dream is not so easy to wake from," is such an amazing line. Seriously, I want merch with that quote on it.

I liked that going through with the relationship was Cal's choice in the end. Merrin didn't push it, she didn't pressure it. She let him bring it up and come to her when he was ready and if that meant potentially being rejected by a man she very clearly adores, so be it, and I have no doubt she would've respected that choice if that's what he'd wanted. I know a lot of people seem to think he only makes this decision due to Bode's questions earlier but it really seems to be a combination of multiple things that lead to this. Bode picking his brain definitely got him thinking about it, maybe more than he wanted to, but I do think the other big part of Cal being willing to go forward with it at this moment is his confrontation with Dagan that, while an illusion, did cause him to come to grips with his own mortality in a way. "How does it feel knowing you're about to die. That your life meant nothing." As Cal says, Dagan uses an extremely powerful force hallucination based on fear here, so while losing himself to the darkness might scare him, his life being completely meaningless is what he seems to fear the most. Cal's journey throughout Survivor encompasses many things but one of them revolves around feeling aimless and finding a purpose, preferably outside of being a hired weapon that will surely and slowly consume him. It's what everyone consistently tells him: find a home, settle down, embrace happiness because it's fleeting, the path you're on is not healthy and will consume you otherwise...etc. His decision here to give in to his romantic attraction to Merrin is a culmination of all of these interactions and conversations he's had throughout the story, how they've influenced his line of thinking, and him coming to his own conclusions regarding what he personally wants and at this moment, when things are finally, calm and everyone is in a good place with a plan going forward, he personally decides there's no point in living up to the expectations of the Jedi when the Order doesn't exist anymore and wants to see where this could go.

I love the fact that when Merrin witnesses Cal's darkness in the ISB, it's made abundantly clear that she's just as afraid of losing him as he most likely is of losing her. I do think a major reason why she was able to talk him down at the moment is that he fundamentally understands what it feels like to lose everything and everyone, your entire livelihood. That is what they first bonded over and it's something that keeps them bonded in the saddest, yet most profound way and he would never want to add himself to the list of people she's lost. She's also doing exactly what she said she would. In an instance where again, she reads him like a fucking book, she can tell just from his responses on the intercom that he's losing himself and is guiding him back. She immediately went to rescue him as she says. No question, no argument, nothing, she simply does it. She made him a promise and she kept it and in that moment, he promises that she won't lose him, he won't allow it. This is a fundamental difference between Anakin and Padme's dynamic and Cal and Merrin's. While Anakin's love for Padme quite famously ends up extremely selfish in an "I would lose myself to ensure you're not ripped away from me" type of way, Cal and Merrin's dynamic is leaning towards a more selfless, "I won't allow myself to be lost because I can't let that happen for your sake," type of way and god damn it, I love it.

There are several interactions they have in gameplay that I'm lowkey peeved weren't included in cutscenes and one of them is when Cal returns to the Mantis after all but demolishing the ISB, they have this really short but great interaction where Merrin says that if he ever feels that way again, he needs to tell her. She doesn't even ask him to do it, she all but demands it, "If you feel that way again, you will tell me." She's demanding communication from him regarding the darkness and he doesn't fight this demand at all. He agrees to respect this request and I fucking love that from both of them. I will genuinely be kinda upset if we don't get a moment like that in the next game.

I like how their kiss after they've successfully navigated the abyss is kind of their first kiss inverted but instead of "omg we might die, I need to kiss you" it's more "holy shit, we survived, I need to kiss you," but instead of Merrin initiating, now it's Cal. I'm probably reading too much into that but whatever, it's cute.

This isn't about any one part in particular but I do love that it looks like the headcanon so many people had regarding Merrin most likely being quite physically affectionate is turning out to be true.

...I think that's enough for now lol I might add on some things later

Apologies for any typos and thanks for indulging my rambling if you got this far.

#star wars #jedi survivor #jedi survivor spoilers #cal kestis #nightsister merrin #merrical #calmerrin #cal x merrin #dagan gera #santari khri #bode akuna #mine

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djarindroid · 3 months

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Unspoken Care

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

Summary: OK SO I cannot stop thinking about Daryl and I had to write something, so here is a short lil fluff story I wrote. (I've barely proof read this so please forgive me). (Set in Alexandria, post Negan)

Word Count: 614

The sun had been beating down all day, you were sure it had to be the hottest day of the year. The heat however didn’t mean that the work on Alexandria stopped.

After hours of work, you were finally trudging your way home, weighed down by your tired body. All you wanted was a shower, a hot meal and to crawl into bed for a much needed rest.

You somehow managed to drag yourself up the stairs, ready to haul yourself into the shower. Although as you reached the top step you noticed steam pouring out of the cracked open bathroom door, of course someone had beaten you in there.

Sighing, you headed towards your room but as you walked past the bathroom door it gently swung open just enough to reveal Daryl.

‘Long day?’ He asked.

‘You can say that again,’ you joked. ‘Let me know when you’re done in there,’ you added as you made to walk past the door.

Before you could get past though Daryl pushed the door open further to reveal a steaming hot bath. ‘Figured ya’d need this when ya got back,’ he scratched the back of his neck as he spoke.

You blinked, Daryl had run you a bath? He’d always looked out for you but this felt different, more intimate. The exhaustion that had clung to you began to lift, replaced with a warmth that had nothing to do with the steam rising from the tub.

‘Thank you,’ you managed with a genuine smile breaking through. Daryl nodded and quickly disappeared downstairs before you could say anymore.

As you soaked in the relaxing water your mind drifted to Daryl and everything he does for you. The unspoken care he provided, that he never thought twice about. It wasn’t just about running you a bath, it was about understanding you without the need for words, a true connection that can only be forged after what you’d gone through together.

You closed your eyes and sunk further into the water, feeling the knots in your shoulders loosen. In a world where vulnerability was a luxury, his actions for you spoke louder than any words ever could. You truly felt safe and cared for in a way you knew no one else could make you feel.

After what felt like an age, you stepped out of the bath with a new found energy. You slipped into a pair of clean joggers and a hoodie, and ventured downstairs. As you made your way down a creak alerted Daryl to your presence, prompting him to look up from a map he was studying at the kitchen island.

His eyes met yours and you felt the corner of your lips tug up into an undeniable smile.

‘Feel better?’ He asked with a signature gruff tenderness.

You nodded, unable to quash your smile even if you wanted to. ‘Much, thanks to you.’

He looked back to the map with a shrug, ‘just figured ya could use a break.’ You didn’t miss the small smile he tried to hide.

The rest of the evening unfolded with a shared meal and quiet conversation, the weight of the day lifting further and further from your shoulders. Whatever this unspoken bond connecting you and Daryl was, grew stronger the longer you sat in each other's company. You didn’t feel the need to address it, you were sure Daryl could feel it too.

And as you sat on the sofa next to each other at the end of the night you didn’t think twice about resting your head on his shoulder as you drifted off to sleep, feeling the most comfort you’d felt since the apocalypse had begun.

#I tried to add small daryl-isms to the way he speaks I hope it came across as intended #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon x you #daryl dixon fluff #daryl dixon #the walking dead #daryl dixon fanfiction

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tan1shere · 2 months

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Could you write a Young Miko story where she notices the reader is being distant. And when she asks it’s because of hate she’s receiving online and she’s not used to it. Like Miko comforting the reader maybe? So cute to think about.

My Angel

Young Miko x female reader !

A/n: Your wish is my command my love ! I especially find this fitting right now, so I hope this helps whoever reads it when you're facing hurtful people <3

Warnings: none, comfort only !!! Buttt maybe a bit of hate and language ? Small breakdown ?

Masterlist

It rang through your brain constantly. You couldn't get rid of those same words. Over. And over. Miko had noticed this change in you, she didn't know what was exactly going on but today she decided to get it out of you. You were drifting from her, it hurt her as she missed you. You knew the 'perks' of being with someone in the public eye, it wasn't as easy as you had thought. You were so confident that any hate you got you'd be able to handle it, ignore it even. Boy were you wrong. It kept on going, nonstop of how you didn't deserve her, how they'd be better. That, you could handle. You knew miko chose you for a reason. She wouldn't be here if she didn't want to be. But it started getting more brutal. Little details you even hated about yourself, they'd mention it.

Then it got to the worst of the worst kind of hate. The 'kill yourself' and so on. It was getting to you near the end. You couldn't handle it anymore.

As you sat watching TV, you couldn't stop thinking about this one message you got. "Miko is just sorry for you, she doesn't love you, I mean look at yourself. You don't belong here or even in this world at that point. Go kill yourself." It played in your mind all day, a little voice chanting it. You couldn't let the last part consume you, but you were beginning to let it just happen. We're they truly right? It was tricking your brain into thinking it was. All the voices, all the messages. You couldn't think properly. You get a tap on your shoulder, it was Miko. She was finally home. You look at her, a bit startled but your expression changed back to its gloomy self.

Although you didn't look sad per say, your demeanor was cold, off-putting. "What's up with you lately?" She just asks at random. You furrow your brows, keeping looking at her. "What do you mean?" Fiddling with your fingers, you kept looking at her. But you couldn't bare it. "You've been so distant, have I done something?" She wonders, sitting beside you. You just shake your head. "So is there something?" Now you look to the side, such a stupid give away but you could feel tears pooling and you didn't want to look stupid. She gently grabs your face, and you curse because when she does a warm liquid comes down your face.

There was no stopping them, they had been bottled up inside for far too long. "Shhh, talk to me." She brings you close rubbing your hair. "Please? Im really worried." She continues speaking, doing her same actions. You couldn't form words, you sob and sob. But her sweet heart understands completely, she takes her time with you. Knowing that whatever it was wasn't easy. Gentle touches on your hair and your cheek as you rest your head on her should. Your crying had subsidied thankfully. Your eyes stung so you just closed them. "Want to tell me what's up mama?" Her tone was soft, and comforting. "I've, been getting quite a lot of messages.." You spoke quietly, feeling your throat hurt also. Having let so much emotion out you were just genuinely tired. "What messages love?" A sigh escapes your lips. You grab your phone to just show her as it'd be easier.

She reads everything, comments, dms, posts. It hurt her, not only were they being cruel to the woman she loved, but her own fans. "It's so hurtful." Your quiet voice speaks up. "I know, I know.." She sighs now. "You don't deserve any of this, you've hardly been in anything anyway, this is so disgusting." You hated the fact she was still reading the stuff, you could see how upset she was about the whole situation. You grab your phone gently, setting it aside. "I didn't want to worry or upset you-" She shakes her head. "I'm glad you told me. Although I wish you would've done it a bit sooner, I'm glad I know now." You nod. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you til now." She kisses your forehead. "I chose you for a reason, none of these hating loosers." You smile as she speaks a small laugh coming out of you. "There she is." Shes the one smiling now, you blush at her words. "Keep that, it suits you." She refers to your smile. "Oh Miko. How'd I get so lucky." You put your head back onto her shoulder.

"How did I get so lucky with you." She rubs your arm, as a comfortable silence approaches. "Don't listen to them from now on yeah? And if there's anymore, please tell me. Its no good keeping it to yourself like that." You nod and smile at her. "I'm glad you chose me." "I'm glad I chose you too my angel."

#young miko x reader #young miko #young miko fluff

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snowmist-hashira · 11 months

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Hello! You might know me though XD I hope you're having a good day/evening! <33

I've been seeing a couple of gorgeous fics about Muichiro x Tsuguko! Reader, so I was thinking of trying Muichiro x Ordinary Civilian! Reader this time hehe. It's up to you how you're gonna write this, so there's this young lady that Muichiro saves from a demon when she got lost in the woods and eventually she conveyed how much she finds him cute. Muichiro has never experienced this sort of thing, so he didnt mind when she asked if they can exchange letters. Their pacing in conversation was normal, except Muichiro wasn't the type to write too long and was straight to the point. Despite that he never fails to respond to her letters, there was a sense of wanting more like she wished he had been a little more dedicated to writing longer sentences but she realized she can't ask him that. Until one day, he stopped writing back and it took 2 weeks to hear from him again. She got really worried, and was scared that something bad might have happened to him and when she did hear from him again, he actually went to visit her house which surprised her. Eventually, she was teary eyed and a bit upset and scolded him that he should've responded to her instead of making her worry like that. Muichiro understood so he genuinely apologized. She notices how Muichiro seemed different from the first time they've met. It turns out, he's got his memories back and he's sorted out many things including his feelings for her. He admitted that when he saved her, he thought she was actually beautiful and she reminded him of the golden gingko tree. Muichiro never understood his feelings before and was new to this, but he didnt want to stop writing to her. As she was shocked at this and was trying her best to digest everything he said, he said he wanted this time to be near to her and keep her close. He wanted to see her everyday, so he asks if she could live with him. (I think the most suitable key phrases would be: "I fell in love with you.", "I regret my inconsistencies.", "I feel you even though we are apart.") Omg idk if this was too much, I wanted to provide specific details with the best I can 😭😭 I'm quite excited how this'll turn out, you're really such a wonderful writer 🥺🥺 I'll also lookout for your other chapter updates waahh sending you support and love 💜💜

[Chapter title: Unveiled in Letters]

[Requested] Muichiro Tokitou x Reader

Wattpad:[KNY Fanfiction] (One shots) Tokito Muichiro x Reader Archive:Kimetsu No Yaiba: Tokitou Muichiro x Reader Master list:♠ Information ♠ Word count: 2,276

Artist link: https://twitter.com/oekaki_eririn

I am open to requests for Muichiro x Reader content, and I also enjoy engaging in roleplays. If you're interested in either, please feel free to check out my pinned post for more information. ~ ♠ I have just returned from my trip, and I feel like I may have rushed this particular piece. I'm not sure if I was able to capture all the specific details accurately, so please forgive me if I missed anything. I hope that it still meets your expectations, and I appreciate your patience. Here is the result!

It happened in an instant, catching Y/n off guard. With the intention of taking a leisurely walk in the nearby forest for a change of scenery, she found herself losing her way amidst the dimly lit woods. As Y/n stumbled through the darkened woods, her heart pounding, she suddenly caught a glimpse of a sinister figure lurking among the trees. It was a demon, the tales of these flesh-devouring creatures, once dismissed as mere stories, suddenly felt all too real.

Frozen in terror, Y/n desperately searched for a way to escape, but her mind was clouded with panic. Her eyes fell upon the gruesome scene of blood and felt the unmistakable aura of hostility, a chill ran down Y/n's spine, intensifying her fear. The menacing creature advanced towards her with a palpable sense of malice, leaving her paralyzed with terror. She tried to scream, but her voice failed her, suffocated by the overwhelming fear.

With her eyes tightly shut, Y/n braced herself for the inevitable, prepared to face the demon's claws tearing into her flesh. But to her surprise, no pain or injury befell her.

As Y/n opened her eyes, her heart pounding in her chest, she was met with a sight that defied all expectations. The demon that had approached her, brimming with malice and hostility, had disintegrated into a pile of ashes. In its place stood a young boy with striking black hair that faded into a vibrant mint color at the tips.

The boy's presence exuded an otherworldly aura, and the blade he held in his hand emitted a soft, ethereal glow that illuminated the dimly lit forest.

As Y/n gazed into the boy's eyes, a sense of calm washed over her, transcending the initial shock of the encounter. His mint-colored orbs meeting her golden ones, though devoid of life, held a certain depth and grace that captivated her as if resonating with tranquility and understanding.

Without looking back, the man continued walking, his gaze fixed ahead. However, Y/n couldn't resist the urge to call out to him, her heart pounding in her chest. She clenched the fabric tightly, summoning the courage to speak.

"Um!" Her voice trembled, causing the man to pause in his tracks, his body turning slightly towards her as if awaiting her words. "T-Thank you," she managed to utter, her gratitude ringing through the quiet forest.

With a small nod of acknowledgement, the man seemed ready to resume his departure. Sensing the moment slipping away, Y/n mustered up the courage to speak, hoping to extend their brief encounter.

"C-Can I... know your name?" Her voice wavered, the question hanging in the air. The boy, seemingly in his mid-teens, regarded her with an unreadable expression. His gaze shifted downward briefly before he answered.

"Muichiro Tokito," he replied, the words carrying a hint of detachment.

Muichiro Tokito. The name hung in the air as Y/n absorbed the sound of it. She repeated it softly to herself, committing it to memory. There was something about the name that felt significant, as if it held a hidden story waiting to be unveiled.

Desperate to keep a connection with Muichiro, Y/n summoned her courage and boldly made a request. "I-Is it okay if we exchange letters?" The words tumbled out, tinged with a mix of anxiety and hope. She knew it was an unconventional proposition, but there was something about him that captivated her, and she yearned to learn more about his enigmatic nature.

Muichiro blinked in surprise at her peculiar request, she was fully expecting to be declined. However, after a moment of contemplation, he nodded in agreement, accepting her proposal. Y/n's eyes sparkled with delight, her golden orbs reflecting a bright smile as she expressed her gratitude for his acceptance.

And so, their exchange of letters began. While she poured her heart out, sharing her thoughts, emotions, and daily experiences in great detail, Muichiro's responses were brief and concise. His letters consisted of a few sentences, sometimes just a single paragraph, and he often used only one sheet of paper, leaving the rest blank.

Y/n couldn't help but notice the stark contrast in their letter exchanges. She couldn't help but feel a tinge of disappointment. She longed for more expressive strokes, longer sentences that would provide a deeper glimpse into Muichiro's world. She yearned to understand him better, to unravel the layers of his personality, and to forge a stronger bond through their letters. Deep down, she wished that he would dedicate more effort to writing longer sentences in his responses.

Nevertheless, Muichiro never failed to reply to Y/n's letters each time, and she still cherished and appreciated his responses, even if they lacked in length and words. The fact that he took the time to acknowledge her and maintain their correspondence meant a great deal to her.

His consistent replies became a source of comfort for Y/n. Even if his letters didn't contain extensive details or expressive strokes, she knew that Muichiro valued their correspondence and respected her desire to get to know him better. It was a silent affirmation that he was willing to invest in their exchange, albeit in his own unique way.

Y/n's appreciation for Muichiro's responses grew as she began to realize that perhaps his brevity and simplicity held their own kind of beauty. His concise words held meaning, and she started to notice the subtle nuances in his choice of phrases. It was as if he had mastered the art of saying more with less, leaving room for interpretation and deeper reflection.

As time passed and Muichiro's replies ceased, Y/n's worry intensified. What was once a steady flow of letters turned into a silent void. Her worry escalated with each passing day as the pile of unanswered letters grew taller, resembling a small mountain of her unanswered thoughts and emotions. The absence of Muichiro's replies left her feeling unsettled and anxious. What could have happened? Why had he suddenly stopped responding?

She replayed their previous exchanges in her mind, searching for any signs or clues that might explain the sudden silence. Had she said something wrong? Did she unknowingly cross a boundary? Doubt and self-blame crept into her thoughts, adding to her growing distress.

Days turned into weeks, and Y/n's worry transformed into a constant state of sickness. She couldn't shake off the feeling of unease, fearing the worst. It was as if a deep void had formed within her, longing for the connection she had cherished so deeply.

Muichiro did showed up at her house after two weeks of silence, he stood before her, smiling and seemingly unharmed, Y/n's initial surprise quickly transformed into a mixture of anger and hurt. The floodgates of her emotions opened, and tears welled up in the corners of her eyes. Without thinking, she lightly smacked his chest, her hand connecting with a mixture of frustration and sorrow.

"Why?" Y/n's voice quivered with anger as she scolded him, her voice laced with disappointment. "Why did you disappear without a word? I've been worried sick, drowning in a sea of unanswered letters!"

Her words came out in a rush, her emotions overwhelming her. The mountain of unanswered letters, the sleepless nights filled with worry, and the longing for a connection that had been abruptly severed all converged into a whirlwind of anger and hurt.

Muichiro's smile faded, his eyes reflecting a mixture of remorse and understanding. He reached out to gently touch Y/n's cheek; his voice filled with genuine remorse. "I'm sorry, Y/n. I didn't mean to cause you distress or make you feel abandoned. I should have communicated with you beforehand."

Y/n's anger wavered as she saw the sincerity in Muichiro's eyes. The tears in her eyes blurred her vision as she tried to reconcile her emotions. She lifted her gaze to meet his, her tear-filled golden orbs widening with realization.

The once lifeless mint-colored orbs he possessed now seemed to shimmer with a newfound gentleness. There was a noticeable change in him, something that Y/n couldn't quite put her finger on. A glimmer of gentleness that hadn't been there before. It was as if a veil had been lifted, revealing a depth of emotion and vulnerability that she hadn't witnessed until now.

Muichiro's transformation filled Y/n with a mix of hope and curiosity. She wondered what had prompted this change, what battles he had fought within himself to reach this point. But above all, she was grateful for this newfound glimpse into his true self.

Muichiro noticed her awestruck gaze, and a small smile curved on his lips, as if he could read her thoughts. "I regained my memories," he said, referring to his previous amnesia. While Y/n had never minded his condition, seeing him more expressive in his facial features made her heart flutter.

The admiration for his cuteness and charm deepened further after that. Y/n listened intently to his explanations, including his newfound clarity about his own emotions.

"I was able to sort out a lot of things," he continued. "Including my feelings for you."

"… ‘Feelings for me’?" Y/n repeated, her heart skipping a beat at Muichiro's words., her voice laced with uncertainty, trying to comprehend the significance of his words.

His admission that he had sorted out his feelings, specifically his feelings for her, sent a wave of surprise through her.

Muichiro's eyes met hers, his gaze steady and sincere. "Yes, Y/n. I've come to realize that my feelings for you run deeper than friendship. The more I got to know you through our letters, the more I realized how much you mean to me.”

"I don't fully understand these feelings, but I do know that I want to get to know you better," he confessed. It began to make sense to Y/n, realizing that despite the brevity of his letters, he had always made the effort to keep the correspondence going.

He continued, his voice sincere, "You're beautiful. Your eyes hold a sense of longevity, reminiscent of the color of a gingko tree." It was a unique and poetic comparison that resonated deeply within her. His ability to see beauty in the small details of the world around him only deepened her admiration for him. A visible blush tinted Y/n's cheeks as Muichiro praised her.

Y/n's mind raced, trying to process the unexpected confession. She had admired his charm and cuteness from the beginning, but she hadn't dared to hope that he felt the same way about her. Her lips parted in astonishment, struggling to find the right words.

“I’m sorry for being inconsistent with my letters.” Y/n's heart fluttered as Muichiro's hand gently cupped her cheek, his touch radiating warmth and tenderness. The softness in his gaze mirrored the gentleness of his touch, deepening the swirl of emotions within her. It was a moment of vulnerability and sincerity that left her speechless, unable to find the right words to express the depth of her feelings.

"I apologize for my sudden disappearance, but now I want you to be with me.” Muichiro's caress on her cheek, his thumb gently gliding across her skin, sent shivers down Y/n's spine. His touch conveyed a depth of emotion and a sense of protectiveness that was difficult to put into words. Y/n's heart raced with confusion at his words.

Y/n's voice trembled as she asked, "W-What do you mean?"

Y/n's heart skipped a beat as Muichiro's smile filled her with warmth and anticipation. She couldn't help but feel a hint of disappointment when her bangs got in the way of their contact, but the soft kiss on her forehead still sent a wave of affection through her. "I want you to be by my side," he repeated, his voice filled with sincerity. "I want to see you every day."

"I can protect you from demons, and I can provide for the both of us," Muichiro expressed, his words filled with confidence. "Will you stay with me?"

His words carried a sense of unwavering determination and a promise to be there for her, no matter what challenges they may face.

Overwhelmed by a flurry of emotions, Y/n found herself at a loss for words. Her heart thumped in her chest; her cheeks flushed with a deep shade of red. The warmth radiating from Muichiro's actions and words seemed to melt her into a puddle of blissful contentment.

Y/n's nod was a silent affirmation of her acceptance, and she found solace in resting her head on Muichiro's chest. her heart filled with a mix of emotions: love, excitement, and a sense of security. She leaned her head onto Muichiro's chest, finding solace in the steady beat of his heart. It was a gesture of trust and vulnerability, allowing herself to be close to him and feel the warmth of his presence.

Muichiro's soft smile deepened as he gazed down at her, his eyes reflecting tenderness and affection. With gentle care, he parted her bangs, ensuring that their connection remained uninterrupted. Y/n's breath hitched as his lips met her forehead in a tender kiss, a gesture that conveyed a promise of love, protection, and devotion.

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aroace-polyshow · 2 months

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I couldn't stop thinking since your post about wxs parents, or more specifically the tenma parents, bc they actually interest me a lot

Because like, the tenma mom DOES actually come up sometimes in saki and tsukasa's side stories and an area conversation. And not just the fact she taught them to play piano, i mean more familial situations. She even appears by herself and it's usually when they're at the house and she seems really sweet and caring actually

And also whenever Tsukasa brings her up (which he seems to do more often than Saki? Or at least from the stories I've read, i might be wrong) he speaks of her in a way that seems quite fond and might imply that she is around at the house at least usually

In contrast, though, the tenma dad almost NEVER comes up. Like the only time I remember him being mentioned (that is NOT about tsukasa bringing up That Show they watched as kids or the family visiting saki at the hospital bc that's obvious they're there) was once in the hinamatsuri event about how he bought the doll stand and some helmet when they were little? smth about how he impulse buys things

And that was it. He didnt even appear

He's never actually appeared by himself at the house or any side story to my knowledge (do correct me if I'm wrong) and he doesn't SEEM to be around the house on a daily basis at all

Even in the past when tsukasa stayed at home alone it was tenmama he got calls from, at least the one they showed us

Tenpapa's job is also never mentioned unlike tenmama's. And like tenmas are implied to be at least somehow recognisable or respected of a family, or at the very least by people like the Aoyagis since they are always stated to hold them in such regard, but is it just about tenmama playing the piano? Or maybe there's smth more about the dad that we don't know?

He's just. Such an enigma. We barely have any crumbs. Even in that image of baby tenmas seeing a show for the first time from the beginning of wxs main story shows a little bit of tenmama, like we can see her hair and all, but we can only see tenpapa's hand

It's just... where is he?? At work? What does he do?? Why don't they talk about him that much??? Why won't they show him in side stories??? Am I reading too much into it???

He makes me so mad pls Sega tell me more about the tenma family im insane about them

ANYWAY sorry for writing almost an entire post in your asks it was supposed to be shorter but I accidentally spiralled deeper

Anyway tsukasa and saki definitely love their parents and at the very least the mom seems like a rly caring and overall present person in their lives. They never say anything bad about the dad either if they ever do. They seem like good parents overall. The whole tsks neglect thing, yes, of course it wasn't a good decision to leave him alone at home, but it doesn't make them bad. Tsukasa never even mentioned anything that could imply he holds it against them and ik he is stupidly forgiving sometimes and sometimes forgets about himself but still. You get me. Besides we don't really know the extent of it all so shsuhd

We just need more tenma lore dammit

do not apologize for long asks they make me very happy to read :3

i didn’t know all that abt tenmamom though!!! i practically never read side stories so. yeah no wonder i missed her fjbsjdbajdn

sega please give us more tenmadad content. or any at all really…..

and yeah!!! i can understand wanting angst but the tenmas are genuinely a happy family and they make me happy :3 i don’t think of his parents as bad even with tsukasa’s childhood bc like, it wasn’t something they wanted to do yk. doesn’t mean what happened with tsukasa wasn’t Bad ofc. either way i love the tenmas. sega can we get more tenma lore. please

#asks #long post

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surely-galena · 11 months

Text

ToT Main Story 9 Commentary/Thoughts (Part 3)

[1] [2] [3]

This is the final part and I will be including some longer thoughts (and my bingo card) at the end! I've purposely stayed away from other people's episode 9 posts while I write this up (notably Zak and Sam's) so their thoughts don't influence mine, but I am definitely looking forward to seeing if the feelings/concepts I'm picking up align with what other people are thinking. Heads up that the commentary here is going to be slightly out of order so I can push my longer thoughts to the end.

Ohhh. Okay, this got me. Marius was literally physically attacked and no one (except Vincent probably) has genuinely cared enough to ask about Marius the person and not Marius the suspect/informant. I'm really glad MC chose to ask this question rather than let Luke interrogate him right off the bat. And the fact that Marius is surprised also speaks so much as to what he was expecting... I did not think I would be getting treated to good MariRosa today.

(He went down to the NSB office... alone. Marius...)

Vincent's back on the case again, I see. Truly, what would Marius do without him?

This bit confused me. Didn't Luke only tell MC about his illness in his first anniversary card? Am I missing something from the timeline here?

And hey, more details about the incident. The fact that Luke contracted the illness during his treatment and that the drugs were suspected definitely point toward NXX influence.

Longer Thoughts Incoming, Here We Go

All right, first thing. This scene on its own doesn't say much. It's when combined with the other things I've picked up on that it feels... a little off?

I don't know if I've spent too much time with fanon!Luke or if I've simply been reading too much into it, but episode 9 Luke feels different. He's really aggressive this time, which is nothing strange, we've seen Raven before, but it also feels like he's relapsing into keeping MC/Rosa in the dark? (It's not quite that, either, I'm having a hard time putting the exact feeling into words.)

That scene with Julian where Luke is trying to push him into standing up for himself? It was well meaning, but gosh was it tense -- especially with the lack of communication with MC. No wonder she felt the need to step in and help.

There's a lot of fist banging on tables and harsh sentences from Luke, a lot more often than usual (to Julian, to Skye, to NXX members). It's a good reminder of how scary he can be, but it also provides massive whiplash from all the fluff we've been getting recently.

Additionally, Luke's interactions with the other NXX members (notably Marius and Artem) feel more distant. Like they're potential enemies, not coworkers/teammates.

I also think it's possible all of this is because Luke is getting desperate. He's getting worse, the meds are doing less and less for him, and he knows he's running out of time. Despite this, he's still alive. He's still able to change his fate -- or at least he hopes he is -- but to chase after his goals, sacrifices have to be made. He can't afford to dawdle or spend time not getting to the point, because time is slipping through his fingers and he needs to do as much as he can before he's entirely done for.

Basically? I think Luke is becoming increasingly stressed and he's (either consciously or unconsciously) taking it out on everything happening around him. The only people he's been truly open to in this episode are Aaron and MC herself. He's beginning to close himself off, even to MC (*points to the final scene with him covering her eyes and talking about lying to her*). Physically, he's not fine, and mentaIly, I don't think he's doing okay either, and that is concerning.

Okay, now onto the second major detail that has been nagging at me. These are from the final scenes as example excerpts, but is it just me or have the NXX been weirdly hostile to each other throughout this entire episode?

In one of the earlier scenes (after Marius speaks with Tyson), Marius runs into Luke. The conversation sounds like fairly normal NXX team banter, but Marius' demeanor is strange:

"But when [Marius] gives Luke a side glance, his eyes reveal a sense of sarcasm and coldness, completely different from his tone." (Main Story 09-01)

I'd assume this is because of the recent NSB action regarding Pax, the press, and the NXX Team's investigation. Luke is a potential weakness in the NXX Investigation Team because he belongs to the NSB. But after all the team building events MC put her heart and soul into, this is honestly kind of tragic. For them to fall apart so easily, because it was only ever her who glued them together.

(I know @roshie-writes has mentioned something to me about the NXX team falling apart, but I didn't know it would be so soon, or be so abrupt. Not like this...)

Not only do Luke and Marius have some kind of under the surface conflict, we have Luke and Artem who have a much more overt kind of conflict (i.e. Luke pushing for Skye's guilt and Artem being Skye's attorney). I've got to say that this is really interesting because we've never had Artem and Luke on opposite sides before. It's always been Artem vs. Marius or Artem vs. Vyn. To have Luke be isolated because of his association with the NSB (and potentially his illness) is an interesting story move (even if it hurts the found fam enjoyer within me).

Considering we're passing off the lead role to another boy after this, MC will no longer be tagging along with Luke in the next episode. This means that while Luke and Artem are on opposing sides of the conflict, MC has the advantage of being middle ground (because, y'know, they're all in love with her).

Even so, this part surprised me:

It's not out of character for Artem to prove MC wrong. What stands out is that he usually does it kindly. This is a laugh that MC knows to be directed to an opponent, and it hits harder when they're work partners. If there is anyone Artem can expect to be an ally, it's MC. But not in this case. Not now, when tensions are so high.

Then we have Vyn, who's being, what? Switzerland in all of this? In this episode he existed to have one conversation with MC, along with the absolute boldness to take it in front of his mystery guest. You do you Vyn, we love our behind the scenes guy doing suspicious things as usual. Notably he hasn't chosen a side yet, and neither has MC. We know that MC will follow her heart, and that Vyn will always look out for MC in his own way (which is true for all the boys), but it might be interesting to keep an eye on him as we head into Main Story 10.

I know the ToT main story can get pretty heavy, but this one was more emotionally draining than I thought it'd be. I'll have to see how it all connects before making a proper judgement about how much I liked it, but overall I'm glad we gained a lot of new info (and more questions to delve into later).

Here's my bingo card for the episode. I was so close to a bingo, but I got to cross off many boxes anyway!

#tears of themis #okay now I'm off to read sam and zak's posts I am so curious to know what you both thought

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eccentric-nucleus · 4 days

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so, i finally finished (posting) my huge, novel-length teenage mutant ninja turtles fanfic. i just posted the final epilogue over on ao3!

here is my director's commentary on it, if you want to read even more about it. this contains spoilers for the whole thing. maybe read the epilogue first and sit with that for a minute. also this will probably be pretty incoherent if you haven't read the whole thing. it's just a disconnected series of thoughts i have about the story, really

man, this story. this is maybe the longest thing i've ever written? like 'the new hive' and 'hell game' had more words (i think) but they were mostly a disconnected series of sex scenes with thin connective tissue between them. this is ~200k words of a single, linear, mostly-plot narrative. i'm writing scenes that aren't just about getting the two leads to fuck!! that's weird. it's definitely the most ambitious thing i've written. kind of weird that it's tmnt fanfic. that's just how it worked out, i guess.

so back in 2022 i watched the rise of the tmnt movie because people kept talking about the animation quality of the fights and that got me into a spiral of actually paying attention to the ninja turtles. i had never been into them & genuinely i think a huge part of getting into tmnt stuff was that rise actually varied the design of the turtles so that they weren't all basically identical save for color-coding. turns out visual design was the missing mystery ingredient.

also in 2022 i was burning out on writing 'goblin cave', when what i had intended to be a fun little writing exercise ended up getting algorithmically surfaced and getting me hundreds of comments on each chapter. that got a little stressful and i wasn't really enjoying that, so i stopped. but i was like, hmm you know i mostly just write weird porn but maybe i should write something a little more ambitious. with a plot, and everything. 'goblin cave' was (in my mind) all about a character who was created for violence deciding art was a much more worthwhile pursuit. but the main character of that doesn't know what art is. because it's a magical dungeon core. and i was still thinking a lot about dead zones of the imagination, by david graeber. so i was like, okay, let's do this again but in a slightly more self-authentic way and make it weird gay porn with weird animal dicks. let's give michelangelo ninjaturtle a monologue about how the powerful are utterly insulated from any consequence.

(also early on, after watching most of rottmnt, i stumbled across this blog post about the tmnt comics and the end of the world. that ended up being deeply influential on the fic too. i've been kinda in a state for the past few years and this fic is absolutely a part of me working through a lot of complicated feelings about the world and the future. lol people talk so much about people writing dark fic 'to cope' but this was pretty much the first time i've outsourced my emotional processing by having bad things happen to fictional characters.)

so uhhh where to start here. the setting of the fic is this complicated messy mashup of a half-dozen tmnt continuities. it's very rise-heavy, since... that was the only series i had watched(/read) when i had determined the major plot points, but there's a lot of bits and pieces from all over.

to roughly outline the characters here, a huge influence on mikey's personality in this is... mikey's 'dr delicate touch' persona in rottmnt. in the sense that... okay yes yes that is a kid's show and all of his dr delicate touch lines are, you know, setups and punchlines. you think he's going to be nice but actually he's mean! etc. but in-universe it's like, wait hold on a second. mikey is like the most emotionally-intelligent of the four. he absolutely knows when people are on the edge of flipping out and need a calming out to a stressful situation. and instead he freaks them out more! mikey's hobby is: being mean to his friends & family, for fun! what a fun character trait.

i was thinking about this tweet a lot, too. i read some writing advice once that people tend to make characters who are supposed to be likable too squeaky-clean. nothing but positive character traits for them! but actually every 'positive' character trait is exactly the same as a 'negative' one; it's just a matter of focus and degree. a character is light-hearted and comedic? they can never take things seriously, even when they really should. a character is willing to do anything to protect the people they love? so they're violent and threatening and scary if they happen to decide you're something that they need to protect against. etc. i was really dedicated in this to bringing out the worst characteristics of everybody's personalities.

mikey was also very deeply inspired by: all the garbage progression fantasy stuff i've been reading. i've complained about this several times on this very blog, but a constant theme in most progression fantasy is 1. the main character will constantly get more and more powerful and 2. the main character will never really have their relationship with the rest of the world changed via that power. it's just stat-ups. they just have higher stats so they're more powerful. mikey is the most powerful person on the planet and it's fucking ruining his life. he knows that there's nobody capable of actually checking his behavior, & he's in this constant state of thinking he's maybe a few bad days away from murdering half the planet and incredibly aware there's not really anything he can do about that aside from constantly worry. he's kind of an anxious mess.

mikey absolutely thinks it's more ethical to murder somebody out of the sheer glee of seeing people crushed before you than murdering somebody for something as tedious as mob orders. you're satisfying a deep, raw desire felt from the heart! that's good!

what he'd like to do, in some sense, is just hang out in his studio and chill with other artists, but he knows the world is not gonna let him do that. things will come up. a lot of his being a creepy bystander thing while people get murdered is b/c he's very much formulated his morality to be like... it is not his responsibility to fix other people's problems. other people will do what they want and that has no bearing on him. is that a pretty cowardly and self-serving morality? sure! but he was kinda designed to rule the world & his flinch away from that pretty much defines him as a character in this. that's kinda the morality he needed to end up on to convince himself not to be a genocide machine.

he's incredibly aware he could basically be a superhero, & all it would take is... giving up on all his hopes and dreams and constantly engage with his abilities. and being a superhero isn't that many steps removed from living up to his full design spec and just taking over the world and ruling as god-emperror. idk how well i hit all those notes in the actual fic, but, that's what i was going for. mikey as the narrator clearly doesn't want to talk or think about it so it's never really directly confronted.

raph is... okay so i guess a fairly common piece of fanon, for rise especially, is to characterise raph as having multiple personalities? whether that's him just having alters or him having full-blown MPD depends on the fic. my fun little nod to that is that he's kind of a disassociative mess. he has kind of failed to reconcile the disparate aspects of his personality and he switches between one of several different facades depending on the situation. also, you know. the trauma.

(i didn't really mean for it to be as such, but there is this theme in the story about names? despite everything else mikey has a crystal-clear self-conception of himself and has one name, which he gave himself. raph, who has kinda failed to build his own personality, has a collection of name other people have given him, none of which he feels actually fits him. donnie has a more fluid self-identity and also has roughly a million aliases and false identities & constantly slips in and out of character when it's convenient. leatherhead still going by the name mikey gave him goes hand-in-hand with that bit where mikey meanly thinks about how maybe leatherhead's entire self-conception is hung up on something mikey said to him once, etc. this is one of those things that i'd go back and make more present if i did go back and clean up the rough draft, b/c as it is it's there, but it doesn't really do a whole lot.)

this fic was inspired by... i had read a few big aus that were just like, taking the characters and loose bits of setting and going off in completely different directions. some of NeiNing's aus were a definite influence, plus like, this one au where raph is an ex-con mechanic, etc, etc. just like "i am going to play out a completely unrelated drama using turtles as the dolls". maybe most directly influential was Of Knights and Thieves, where donnie & mikey are corporate espionage hacker/thief types and raph & leo are do-gooder vigilantes. the original concept for this was much more heavily focused on the art forgery. in a very early draft the idea was leo would get involved much more actively in trying to track down the creator of the false takenobus. then i was like, "i am going to crash a completely separate story concept about the dark armor into the side of this art-forgery story". the filename for the story is still 'lol grindr hookup art thief'. that is not really where the story went.

oh man, the art stuff. i made some posts about this at the time! that are now several years old. here's one! i did end up getting a traditional woodcut printing of Tokaido 53 stations, no. 11, Hokone. in a lot of ways doing all the art research was more satisfying and fun than writing the extensive downward spiral that was the latter half of the fic. but, hey, that's life too i guess.

also raph in this is... okay, so, i don't mean this in a mean way. i really liked the fics! but cndrow has written several raph/donnie fics where raph is just like... like a repeated theme in them is raph confessing eternal love & talking about how he's like, mentally planning on them being together forever. on the first date. and sure sure everybody has different tastes; i'm absolutely sure that my interest in guys who are mean leads to some stories that are extremely offputting to some people, etc. but it's like, oh man, raph, please slow your roll a little. if somebody said they were planning our future wedding all of ten minutes into talking to me i would flee the room. & the raph in blinded by the summer sun is very much inspired by that. sadly, i never fully committed to that. originally i even had a line in chapter 9 where slash was like 'please tell me you didn't drop the 'i love you forever' on this guy already' to imply that that was, you know, a theme for raph, but i chickened out and cut it. raph as a kind of rolling series of bad relationships characterized by him falling forever in love w/ his latest crush until the relationship detonates and leaves him not really understanding how things went wrong. but i don't think that's expressed well like, at all. but that ideally should characterize a large part of why he keeps chasing after mikey even well after the point where it would be reasonable to disengage. also to convey some of the downsides of a character believing in true love. it's rough out there in the world.

also thank you tumblr user averyterrible for writing this goncharov post. that was the point in the story where i was like, actually i have been writing raph as way too much of a sad boy. if i want to play in the space of crime drama, there needs to be some crime! he's a yakuza assassin. he needs to chop off somebody's fingers with bolt cutters.

to me, the central question in the fic isn't really 'will the mikey/raph relationship work out' or 'will mikey succeed in his plans', it's 'why is mikey doing these things'. & i think the leatherhead chunks in chapter 23 finally give enough context to what's going on with mikey to let people answer that? like oh, mikey is a mess.

(lol the initial setup for the early chapters are supposed to give an audience response of like, "oh no, raph has some dangerous secrets" "oh no, raph is a violent yakuza murderer! i hope mikey is going to be okay interacting with raph" "...oh no, i hope raph is going to be okay interacting with mikey")

a lot of the story really is about how... mikey & raph's relationship is in a lot of ways very adolescent? they have not had a lot of prior experience with healthy relationships, and they're trying, but, uhhhhhhh. mikey likes to act like he's so cool and above-it-all and unaffected by things happening, but that's actually just b/c he doesn't really care about most things. when something happens that he genuinely doesn't like he immediately snaps and has a giant meltdown. (we see this once with raph, when mikey has a panic attack and throws up when raph blows him off wrt warning him of bishop, and once with donny about the armor, where mike immediately starts tantruming and threatening to kill himself. mikey is very bad at resolving conflict. he's kind of a brat, actually.)

like every character in this is in some way their worst self. they're all pretty awful people. but they're all also trying to... grapple with their place in the world and try to be better people. to even figure out what 'better' means. this is a story about how 'being a good person' is a constant struggle, not to 'do the right thing', but to even figure out what's 'right'. it's about picking yourself up again after a bad period and going, well, let's keep going. like mikey has a lot of traits but one that i, the author, actually think is fairly admirable is his ability to get back up and keep going after a really bad period. which is funny b/c characterwise that goes hand-in-hand with his callousness. just shrug off all the misery you caused other people, i guess! see above about positive/negative character traits.

(also uh there's another tmnt fic author whose work has a lot of... a Bad Guy is constructed/identified. then helpless children (or teens!) are rescued from him. then the bad guy is ruthlessly & violently murdered. sometimes onscreen, sometimes offscreen. and then it's nothing but chapter after chapter of people being happy and cutesy to each other. and like, i get it. but the, like, recurring theme there of the Bad Guy having done something fundamentally unforgivable that separates from all understanding & mercy, to which the only justice is a violent death, just strikes me as... simplistic. sometimes people do really awful things and part of grappling with that as an adult with an adult moral conceptualization is realizing that you gotta look past your initial reflex to punishment.

or like, mikey's whole childhood in this really fucked him up but a huge part of his identity is him having to form an identity from that. having to make the determination of which parts of him are 'him' and which parts were done to him. lol @ him aggressively and extensively rejecting everything about what draxum made him to do & then blithely being like 'we were engineered to eat humans anyway' as a defense for all the corpse-eating. mikey you just like eating people & have decided that part does align with your self-identity. mikey would really not appreciate anybody being like 'i'm sorry nobody saved you from that' b/c that (to him) would basically be the same as them saying they thought he was fundamentally, irreparably damaged & was going to be forever incapable of being anything other than what draxum made him to be. he wouldn't take it well.)

uhhh what else. i mean there's a lot. fun fact pretty much every time mikey gets mad at somebody else he's hugely projecting. even his pacifism is like... hmm maybe he should have killed draxum. a lot of his talk @ raph about splinter is secretly mikey relitigating his feelings about draxum. oh what's that mikey you think that splinter is only playing happy family b/c he's immortal and he has infinite time to spend humoring somebody's illusions but that when push comes to shove he'll drop all that? gee i wonder if that might apply to any dynamics in mikey's own life. lol at mikey being like "wow red your life is kind of a fucked-up nightmare of weird psychopaths playing like they're happy family" and then two chapters is like "hey come meet my family. we live in my genocidal dad's bombed-out lab and we're treating him like a weird racist grandpa". i kinda wanted something that would complicate mikey just being like "i am a pacifist now and i don't kill anybody"; mikey that's all well and good but like half his inner tension comes from not being sure if he should've left draxum alive. that's kinda the mirror to him debating whether or not actually killing leatherhead would've been better. (in a few years shelldon is gonna go through a period of not wanting to talk to any of them. mikey & donnie are better parents than draxum but that's such a low bar.)

(likewise at the end when mikey is like "this is raph's healthiest relationship so far!" to leo, like, this is more mikey projecting. really the raph/casey relationship was probably better for raph & casey, idk, who can say. but is mikey's relationship with raph the healthiest romantic interaction he's ever had? yes, absolutely. we don't get to see the mikey/leatherhead relationship really up-close and personal but it should be pretty clear that it was pretty awful for everybody involved. compared to that, the mikey/raph is absolutely mikey's healthiest relationship so far. just. low bars.)

lol i am a little concerned that mikey's tendency to monologue, & especially his whole political monologue near the end, will get people to think he's just acting as an author's soapbox. i mean, okay, the little author's note where i'm like "as always, mikey is a perfect role model and everybody should do what he does" was a fun little joke. but, oof, the number of fics i've read where the authors feel the need to loudly and repeatedly disclaim that This Story Contains Things The Author Does Not Condone In Real Life is pretty disheartening. way to have absolutely no faith in your audience. but likie, the part where mikey is pretty much flat-out like, "actually i think my moral framework is whatever is necessary to justify my actions" is meant to be pretty damning. maybe not of mikey specifically as a character, just of, you know. the whole world where that's a pretty common outlook among people with power.

lets talk about the rape. part of it is that it felt like it would be inauthentic to go through the entire story without mikey seriously violating one of raph's boundaries. part of it is that mikey here kinda has the trifecta of ASPD, ADHD, & bipolar, and the thing with that is it's very easy to just say that but a little more difficult to convey the personality traits involved. this isn't really something ever stated as such in the fic, aside from various people calling mikey crazy + raph calls him a sociopath once. it's kind of too didactic to just flatly state "and this is what's wrong with mikey!" imo. but. this is a story about violent people. imo you can't just gesture to a character with the background level of callousness for the genre and go "okay this is a clinical sign"; you kinda gotta do something more direct. 'wow mikey sure is CRAZY and WEIRD good thing it only shows itself as him being slightly mean to people'. no. mikey has done some pretty horrible things in the past and clearly isn't fully done with that.

(i did pretty much go straight down the list of symptoms there. impulsive, suicidal, aggressive, violent, risky sex, arrogant, limited empathy, no regard for other people or social norms, difficulty with relationships, arson, etc, etc, etc. but it's not like he's a 'realistic' portrayal here, since... i mean, he is a super-powered ninja. there's a level of 'superficial charm' here but we do get enough of mikey's interiority to be able to tell he's a total mess in a way that's not particularly constructed.)

also it's like. raph graphically tortures several people to death & i didn't really feel the need to disclaim that here. murder is usually seen as a lesser crime in fiction than rape. people love their violent blorbos but the second there's the implication of sexual violence people freak out. the usual line people say is that the threat of murder is a little more removed for most people than the threat of rape, which idk if i fully agree with. but part of it is also to draw a line between raph's violence and mikey's boundary violation. like mikey says, well, raph tried to non-consensually murder him a few times too.

anyway i don't think i really stuck the landing with that either, in part b/c raph's response to it. he's a little too pathetically accepting of things at the end instead of being angry + violent. that could use a rewrite or two.

honestly i'm kinda sick of this story now? which sucks a little, since i kept realizing things about the story all the way up to the very last moment of editing. if i had waited to post any of this until i was done with the first draft... well, it'd be a very different story if i went back and turned this rough draft into something more complete. i never really did manage to hit the character beats with raph i was hoping to. oh well. like, i still like it. but i can definitely see all of its weak points. i guess that's just part of the process of writing. it'd be worse if you wrote a giant novel and came out on the other side not more aware of your failings as an author.

i feel like raph isn't super well-realized in terms of character motivations. or... his relationships aren't shaded in as well as they could be. if i were redoing this whole thing i'd definitely include some chunks of raph pov just to lay out more concretely what he's doing & what his life is like when he's not in the same scene as mikey. i kinda included that raph+donny conversation at the very end just for jokes, but actually ending every chapter with a little section of non-mikey pov would've helped ground a lot of the characters. raph isn't super well-developed and leo is pretty much incoherent absent external familiarity with his character's deal. they're not conveyed super well, in part because, well, any time mikey is onscreen everybody is having to deal with mikey. it's a problem.

but something that absolutely could have worked as a secondary narrative to the story is the whole thing with raph working w/ the oroku. that was a bit of a late addition to the story. it's meant as a reference to, you know, all the times raphael ends up being compared to/assuming the mantle of the shredder in the comics. but as it is since we don't get any real looks into exactly what's going on in yakuza town when mikey's not around none of that got developed very well, imo.

it was very important to me that mikey not learn any lesson here. where things are at in the end are pretty much the exact same as where they were in the beginning. the bit in the pizza scene where he's like 'you guys get to live and i get a boyfriend' is very accurate. literally the only change in mikey's life through this entire thing is that at the end he is in a relationship w/ a guy who he can tell some of what his life is like to. not that it's a super healthy relationship, but it is there.

well, that, and also now he's maybe out of time. (uh, so the laughter at the very end of the epilogue is mikey realizing he's out of time. the whole epilogue really is about how he's got all these conflicting tensions of who-knows-what in his life, & then right in the middle of the tension it's like, whoops, the utrom aren't coming in 10 years or 20 years, they're coming now. and in a week you're gonna be getting some really pointed questions about how you know the utrom envoy. and in a few years, well, there's gonna be some planetary evacuation) like the whole story is about... anxiety. mikey feeling the weight of the future on him in every moment. actually seeing things collapse would be a relief; you'd get the release of all the potentiality collapsing into an actual problem. the moral of the story is you get what you get and in the end all mikey's actions, good or bad or otherwise, have bought him is nine more months of ignoring his problems.

anyway sorry to all the tmnt fans who were expecting a happy cheerful mikey/raph story. this is actually about the fundamental injustice of existence. whoops!

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phantomrose96 · 2 years

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Chrissy help how do you keep motivation for such huge writing projects?? I've seen you posting about abot for a long time but I just clicked it and it's got like 360k words. My guy you are incredible and if you've got secrets to share I'd be very interested. Major props to you

(ABoT)

I'm hoping to resurrect Dickinsonian-era "paid by the word" writing gigs and retire off ABoT Kidding! kidding! I make 0 dollars and 0 cents off ABoT do not sue me IP holders.

More genuinely it's a couple things I guess. One big and simple one being just--I really like the story. It's long because there are a lot of parts I like and wanted to tell. Another is spite, because for a long period of time between 2017-2020 I thought I would never be able to come back to the story so it's something of a "fuck you look what I made anyway."

But I really REALLY think the biggest part to this all was the (tough, but doable) process of learning to be okay with this story taking however long it's gonna take, and being however long it's gonna be.

Back in the days when Tumblr was really a hub for fandom, fandom attention was extremely fleeting, and when you had any of it, it felt like it was always moments away from vanishing. Tourmaline, my 80k Steven Universe fic, I wrote in the span of just over 2 months. I had a chapter out roughly every 2-3 days for that entire sprint. I'm proud of pulling that off. But my main motivation for doing that was absolutely the fear of losing people's attention and interest if I dawdled even a little.

Early-days ABoT was like that too. The first 9 or 10 chapters were all posted in intervals of about 2-3 days apart. I was staying up extremely late to do this which wasn't good for me and I was doing it because I was afraid of losing people's interest and I was getting more intimidated the more I realized how long ABoT would likely be. And then for school and life reasons, my update schedule absolutely had to slow. And I was having a bad time because it was like I could feel myself losing readers and losing relevance, and the backlash was growing, and even when I was finding the time to write I'd started burning out hard on my passion for the story. I'd get frustrated with my own plot and characters, and you can't write a good passion project while frustrated with the characters.

And then I kinda quietly admitted defeat because the stress and the backlash were too much to handle and I couldn't wring anymore of this from myself. After a 1 year, 2 years, I was pretty much sure my readership was long gone. I still thought about the story constantly! I still cared. I just figured I'd missed my window and would never be able to come back except to backlash.

Then just shy of 3 years, I said "fuck it, actually" and wrote the next chapter (okay it was a lot more complicated than "fuck it" but that would take too long to explain.) And in FACT, a ton of the readership came back! It was an extremely warm reception! And new readers, too. Just a lot of really warm, positive feedback. Which absolutely blew my mind because it was completely at odds with my feeling that things needed constant updates to cling to relevance. And the idea of "well if they waited 3 years..." has helped me a lot with allowing time and breaks between chapters. I don't burn out on them. I edit them more. My update schedule's been more like 2-6 weeks between chapters, rather than days.

Allowing that down time, letting ABoT be a steady jog instead of an all-out sprint, has been absolutely crucial to getting as far through it as I am. Even right now, it's been pretty long since chapter 45. I dove super deep into putting ch45 together and I kinda needed some time off after to decompress and step away to not risk burn out. Which was very needed and helpful and now I'm back to chugging through ch46.

There was an old comment, I think on Reddit, that I read years ago which has stuck with me ever since. Someone was recounting a conversation with a single mother who was considering going back to college to get her degree, but was hesitant to do so because she would be 40 by the time she graduated. To which the other person responded "You'll be 40 anyway."

And "you'll be 40 anyway" plays in my head a lot. Like, ABoT's been going for almost 6 years. Well 6 years were going to pass anyway. ABoT might not be done for x-many more months. X-many more months are gonna pass anyway. Time's gonna happen anyway. So I'm not worried about whether this thing is still going by then or not. I'm just keeping at it until it's done.

#ask #abot #a breach of trust

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sugaredrhubarb · 4 months

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Reading with Ru: 2023 oct/nov/dec fic and book recs

Hello hello! Back again with some final recs from what I was reading towards the end of the year. Gonna start with cod because that's where most of my moots are, and then some from other fandoms and published romance I've been enjoying as well.

Just in case this goes outside my little circle, please check the tags of anything I rec; I'll try to mention if I think something is particularly dark, but don't read anything you won't like!

COD

landscape with honey by @ceilidho - (bear shifter!price x reader) starting with ceil because, at this rate, I can't write a list without including her. my friendship with ceil partially started from bugging her asks about bear price, so this one is always gonna be special, but I genuinely love it, ceil writes blatant dubcon really well (as we all know), but I think it's in fics like this—when the hero is just a little off, and the reader is caught between what seems too good to be true and a gut instinct that something isn't quite right—that her writing really thrives. Anyway, I'm okay with a big, burly man hibernating with me in a cozy cabin in the woods for a winter. (side note: we need to be talking about ghost x feral witch reader more)

Mind the Drop by @sprout-fics - (BDSM au, price x reader) more aftercare in fics!!! This wonderful one-shot is based in a universe where people are biologically designated as dominant or submissive. Reader is a sub who is feeling the effects of some missed aftercare, which Price takes notice of and offers his... assistance. Honestly, this is just some really well-written comfort and aftercare from a fun concept.

My daddy didn't love me, so I guess I've moved on to you by @makoodles - (price x reader) clearly, I was back in my Price era, and this fic hits on the central theme of my attraction to him in the first place: daddy issues :) So, if you may want to read 17k of Reader and Price succumbing to their attraction and mutual daddy kinks, this one is for you.

Light On by @peachesofteal - (ghost x singlemom!reader) I feel like everyone was reading it, but if you haven't checked out this lovely story yet, please do! It's nice to take a break from the darker fic, and this one is so lovely while still acknowledging Simon's trauma and obsession. Peaches is an excellent writer, and this sent me down a rabbit hole of single-parent fics and books! I could read so much of this.

Pornstar!ghost by @ghosts-cyphera - ( x reader) lo is on a little break right now, but this is another wonderful entry on the soft side of cod fic. I really enjoy Ghost's charisma and confidence on display here, and every update had me giggling and kicking my feet. (I found lo through her price wife x 141 post, which is also a must read)

okay, so @ohbo-ohno (hopefully) knows I love her, and she wrote a ton and is constantly throwing out mind-bogglingly yummy drabbles, so here are some of my favs from her kinktober and 1k celebration: price x reader breeding (surprise, surprise), soap x reader somno (drugged noncon), 141 x reader orgy, ghoap ft price deepthroating, 141 x free use reader (the dream), kingpin price x reader, ex husband price x reader, gaz x reader a/b/o, and my personal fav I think about all the time ghoap x brand new vampire reader. Maybe got a little carried away, but I adore Bo's work, and she has a unique ability to make everything hot.

And finally, @charliemwrites. When making this list, I was tempted to just rec everything Charlie has posted in the last few months, so if you aren't reading her stuff already, I'm jealous that you get to experience it for the first time. Obviously, it would be a mistake to not start with her current fics: charmed slasher simon (he's a serial killer, so violence warning) and woof woof johnny, which are both so fun and compelling, I get so excited whenever I see a new update. I almost daily think about this dark(ish) Price decides you're his wife post. Charlie also writes just wonderful fluff and lighter but emotional relationships too, and both childhood friend simon and bodyguard!gaz have a special place in my heart

other fandoms

casualties by little fools writing/tianawritesfic - (darklina) yet another person I could rec every single work by. This is a boyfriend's roommate cheating fic with the perfect amount of mean man.

You kept me like a secret (i kept you like an oath) by burninghoneyatdusk - (darklina) I genuinely think everyone should read this; it's modern setting, so no canon knowledge needed. Alina wakes up after an accident and discovers she's pregnant, but she doesn't remember the last year of her life, doesn't know who the father is, and most importantly, doesn't remember the affair that ended her relationship. I could talk about it for ages, but I'm just gonna share my comment on the last chapter: "every action, line of dialogue, description, and internal thought felt deliberate— not a single word felt wasted. you stripped both aleks and alina bare and it felt impossible to not take them in completely. i don't even know how to talk about the therapy sessions and alina's healing. the exploration of her guilt, her past, her anger, her confusion it all felt so earnest and raw. what a gift to read."

Bury Us Both by morriganmercy - (Lavinia Lucia/Nick Bruin) this is sibling incest! For the love of god, don't read it if it's not your thing. I know nothing about The Royals of Forsyth series (books?), but this was recd by someone, and I saw the tags codependency, slowburn, heavy angst, pining, and religious guilt, and now here we are.

bonus! published romance I enjoyed

links are to goodreads

Return to Monte Carlo by Cate C. Wells - set in 1982, fmc runs away from her stifling life with her rich italian husband and his snobby family before discovering that she's pregnant. fun, smutty, warning for miscommunication galore. i saw some comments about the fmc being immature but she's swept into this crazy life at like ~19 so idk enjoy your smut and stop thinking so much.

Between the Devil and Desire by Lorraine Heath - a widowed duchess must learn to get along with a notorious self made rogue when he is given guardianship of her beloved son. I'm a sucker for historical romances and for single parent stories but the combo is so hard to get right and this one did it for me! while sometimes a little ridiculous, i felt the characters actions had clear motivations. watching the mmc's relationship with the son grow was really nice and it actually made sense given his backstory rather than the sudden "guy who hates kids suddenly cares" trope other books do. (warning for discussions of childhood abuse and sa)

Luna and the Lie by Mariana Zapata - say what you will about MZ slow burns but no one else can get me to read 600 pages for one sex scene at 95% in. are most of her character's really similar? yeah. but they're never annoying and i love that they're always good people trying their best. i love all the small details and i love me an older man who is secretly down horrendously bad only to gets worse and worse at not showing it.

Icebreaker by Hanna Grace - people have things to say about this book. do the characters get together early on? yeah. do they hook up in the back of an uber filled with their friends? also yeah (i thought it was hot so). is their very little plot in a 400 page book? sure. i'm here for a good time not to be intellectually challenged. i actually enjoyed seeing their time together and really enjoyed that they just fucking communicated even if there were mistakes along the way. plus big nice hockey player who cares about consent? swoon my little canadian heart.

check the reading with ru tag for more!

#reading with ru #oh boy it's so hard to pick favs #if you read any of these lmk!!#ao3 #fic rec #fanfic recs #fanfiction #cod #darklina #book recs #romance books #romance recs #i had an aneurism trying to make sure everything was linked right

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livwritesstuff · 2 months

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can i ask where you get your inspo for your joanie munson series? i want to write more fics for emma but i dont really have, to put it lightly, good childhood memories or experiences so im not really sure how to make them realistic or "cute"

hello hello

not sure if this was meant for @shares-a-vest bc miss joanie munson is their oc (and such a lovely one, might i add, i love their series), but i like talking about myself so i will be responding to this either way 😁

my upbringing was also uh..dysfuctional to say the least, and a lot of the foster/adoption side of the story is (loosely) based on a situation i grew up in the periphery of, so not much of this is necessarily based on my own lived experiences as a child.

i think my inspo generally comes from 3 places:

1: the internet -> TikTok, reddit, YouTube, etc., and it doesn't even necessarily have to be kid-centric. this post, for example, was inspired by a screenshot of a TikTok that got posted onto instagram. i used reddit for bits and pieces of this post too. people get pretty real on reddit - it's not great for facts, obviously, but i find it to be a good resource for hearing about other people's lived experiences

2: interactions with kids -> i am the oldest of about 100 cousins (it’s actually more like 25 but that’s still a lot i think) and i've grown up with kids of all ages basically my entire life. i also babysat for years and worked with a lot of teenagers at retail jobs.

3 - my own life, be that conversations i overhear, or, occasionally memories of my own childhood. i do also think a small part of me is creating a kind of childhood i wish that i’d gotten, which…i dunno that might make me sound like a crazy person but whatever (this post is 100% just me projecting lol)

in terms of realism, writing kids is genuinely not easy, especially when they're younger. i definitely recommend doing research on developmental milestones for whatever age you’re writing, and I have a general rule for myself that the younger the kid is, the more I try to avoid writing dialogue for them because I think it's really hard to capture in writing the specific way that young kids/toddlers/babies speak.

and then i think that sweet spot where cute and realistic intersect really comes down to remembering that you're (probably) writing from the perspective of a parent. parents (usually) adore their kids and eat up every single thing they do, so it's really more about the way the parents are reacting than what exactly the kid is doing. this post is a good example - moe isn't really doing anything out of the ordinary here; steve and eddie's perspective on it is what makes it feel special.

hope this helps <3

#liv says stuff #liv's steddie dads verse

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rawliverandgoronspice · 10 months

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New anon. I've been a few reading your thoughts and general posts, and I really agree so strongly to many of them. Some of my biggest pet peeves in the story were really how weirdly disjointed it felt, with missing reasoning and foundation? If I may share my thoughts? I wish they had genuinely focused more on characters besides Zelda, because by the end of the storyline, and having watched all the tears, I was left more confused and empty, and not satisfied at all. Not to be rude to Zelda, but I really stopped caring about her because I was so hyperfocused on wanting to know more about the Zonai, Sonia, the Sages, and Ganondorf... and then nothing, well except two tears, and they gave almost no plot relevance? It was such a pity. The sages? Who? Why? How? Every sage showing the exact same memory with only a tiny bit of their personality sprinkled, but nothing about them as sages made me miffed. Ganondorf felt really like a missed opportunity, I think you, other anon's and everyone has already said it. In my words: Lost potential. I don't even need a big sobstory or anything, a monologue like in WW? Yeah he's angry that the Zonai are wasting their "god like powers" but WHY is he so angry about it? How are the lives of the Gerudo? Why are they split? Even if he was raised to crave power, just getting more of a look at why would have been nice. The Gerudo sage would have been a perfect candidate to get some explanation. (I'd have much preferred that over some of the more slice-of-life Zelda tears tbh.) I know it's called "The legend of ZELDA!" But I always took that to be more along the lines of "This is the legend of Zelda, but we (the player) see the legend from behind the scenes." Zelda being a major player and royalty would obviously be more interesting to in-universe historians, and easier to write down, with Link always just being "The hero clad in green!" But us, as the player, we see what really occurred, how the hero came to be, and that he's not "just a hero" but he's actually just a guy, who then takes up the mantle of hero. I just wasn't too invested in Zelda's story, especially since she's just background noise for a lot of the story. (Idk how to best word it, pardon me.)

Hello, thank you for the ask and sorry for taking so long to reply!!

Yeah, I mean I don't even think that Zelda got much opportunity to be a character either, despite her being the throughline for most of it. I don't feel like I learned anything new about her character that I didn't know from BotW, and some aspects developed in that game were gone entirely. As you said, she does feel like background noise, a witness to other people's story. Her nerdiness is set-up and then never really paid off (despite her and Mineru interacting), she gets no personal interaction with Ganondorf... I actually don't think they ever speak to one another directly, for the whole game????

Just went out to check that out and... Ganondorf says Zelda's name to her once, then Zelda asks him how he knows their name. That's it. That's the entire sum of their conversation in the entire game, and it happens in the first 5 opening minutes. Unless you count fake Zelda, but even then that would only be a single sentence, and honestly I don't think it counts?

The more I dig around and the more I'm truly baffled by some of the narrative choices made in this game. Like I want to be Normal about it again (and managing, slowly, just getting through the last asks) but.... honestly I don't understand what happened. The straight up refusal to build up any kind of actual dramatic tension between the leading trio is so baffling to me. Like, not to dip back into the TotK Rewrite Well, but: why didn't they fully commit to the OoT route, since they were already so far down, where Zelda is the only one to suss out Ganondorf is out to get them, and so the tension is concentrated between the two of them, where she tries to save Rauru and Sonia from his scheme but can't (which would also give weight to her sacrifice as she turns into a dragon)? Then you'd have an actual reason to feel invested in the plot and want to avenge her and those she cared about! Why are the stakes so split out between Rauru, Zelda and Mineru, to the point where nothing has any oomph and you, as Link, feel pretty much uninvolved in the entire situation?

Like, sure the buildup to the final fight was amazing, the soundtrack is sooooo sososo good, the mood and ambiance is probably at its best, the fight itself is a little treat, but. I really felt like I was a Hyrule appointed cop having to walk into the freaky abandoned basement and yelling "sir I've been mandated by the royal family to formally ask you to stop dumping experimental chemicals into the sewers of the kingdom" to the local weirdo squatter in his broken hot tub, and then fighting about it.

But personal investment and stakes really didn't land for me. I was glad to see Ganondorf, tho I would have prefered him telling me anything other than generic anime villain stuff before repeatedly punting my face into the floor. But yeah. The story was disjointed, and it kept me from enjoying the extremely carefully crafted mechanics to their fullest capacity. :(

#tloz #asks #thoughts #totk #totk critical #totk spoilers #zelda #ganondorf #rauru #mineru #thanks for the lengthy ask!!#still not over how ganondorf and zelda have ZERO interaction in the past #like.... what was the point then???#seriously what was the point???????#that's utterly insane to me

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