#I had to stop taking birth control today and I just got kind of sad when I turned off my alarm for the last time LMAO

[l-sincline]

Random tmi rant in the hash of tags bc I’m sad ab it

[mermaidsirennikita]

IAD Hero Power Rankings: Part... V?

Almost forgot that a new sexy babe entered the villa and took over today!!!

Rydstrom Woede, demon (king), Kiss of a Demon King

Pros:

--called Sabine a "good girl" even when she's actually being a bad girl

--is explicitly a dom

--the first time he smiles is after she flips him off

--is into spanking

--takes Sabine to a bar and everyone leaves the bar because she's evil and he's all "awwww baby I don't understand why they don't like you :(" when she's committed, like, war crimes... down ridiculous...

--his big comeback to his enemy is like "lmao well I'm about to make your girl's eyes roll back in her head SOOOOOOO EAT IT CUCK"

--has two elaborate fantasies in this novel: a) suspending Sabine from the ceiling and edging her until he lets her grind against his face B) watching Sabine cuddle their cute baby. The duality of demon king

Cons:

--I mean I guess he did some pretttttyyyyy dubious shit to Sabine, but only after she did them to him

--met a woman and became her friend and talked to her for days and literally didn't remember fucking her once until she reminded him.... I thought it was funny

--that time he went at Sabine's tits for so long that the next day she was all "THEY HURT SO BAD" so I assume he was like a newborn baby or something

--"I don't have any fetishes!!!!" has every fetish known to man

--was so down ridiculous that he went to try and kill himself to save her... this is a pro... but I'm gonna pretend it's a con

--is pretty hard on Cade who was just trying!!! his!!! best!!!!!!!!!! but again this is only mildly a con because his disappointed dad thing is hot

2. Conrad Wroth, vampire, Dark Needs at Night’s Edge

Pros:

–exceedingly good at removing obstacles between him and what he wants

–a virgin and SUPER embarrassed about it in a way that is INCREDIBLY precious (when he finally fucked this woman and went “So I was good?” I almost fucking wept)

–murder puppy only wants death and blood (until he discovers………… other things)

–a natural born dirty talker

–BABY BOY…. BABY BOY…./EVIL

Cons:

–has erectile dysfunction for a significant part of his book, he gets better but I was so sad for him

–I mean, is fully insane and wants to murder his entire family, but nobody’s perfect and Nikolai kinda deserves it

–wears sunglasses indoors

–got aroused while buying underwear for her and had to limp home

–made Bowen MacRrieve sad and that makes me really upset because I love Bowen MacRieve

3. Bowen MacRieve, werewolf, Wicked Deeds on a Winter’s Night

Pros:

–is a werewolf general

–was celibate for 1200 years after his lover got so scared of his wolf form that she gored herself on a tree stump (lmao)

–spent those 1200 years trying to bring her back to life

–great at catching and preparing seafood

–breeding kink (wants to put all the bairns in Mariketa)

–kinda into bondage…?

–gets hard at the thought of Mariketa’s carnage, even when he is the carnage

–update pro: gets sent to a party by himself so that Mariketa can run an errand and just sits there confused and miserable at the bar by himself waiting for her to show up even though he knows people there; I imagine this is much like that SNL skit about a dog park for boyfriends, where the shy boyfriend hides under a picnic table

Cons:

–kind of a fuckboy (will say his dead lover’s name when he comes, ONE TIME, but “Mariketa” and “Mariah” begin similarly so)

–doesn’t like it when Mariketa chant incantations into her mirror because it creeps him out

–breeding kink (casually tries to get her to stop taking birth control)

–makes fun of Mariketa’s vibrator, even if I found that actually hilarious

4. Lachlain MacRieve, werewolf, A Hunger Like No Other

Pros:

–chewed his own leg off to get to Emma, pinned her to the ground in broad daylight, and inhaled her neck like a fucking FREAK

–actually pretty good at being the werewolf king (saves Bowen from his own stupidity multiple times, much daddy, very authoritative)

–saw Emma kill her own dad and basically swooned

–is absolutely down to get his blood sucked… through his penis (I believe he says that’s the only way he’ll accept BJs now…?)

–gets by on missing 150 years of progression purely on intimidation, which I personally find deeply sexy

Cons:

–I mean yes Lachlain is one of the rape-iest IAD heroes even if most of that was werewolf instinct and burning alive for 150 years

–doesn’t know how to use an iPod

–but will max out your credit cards

–a werewolf supremacist (is this a bad thing…?)

–says “Kiss me like you want to live” which I guess I should put as a con because it’s non-consensual but whatever I was dow–

5. Cadeon Woede/“Cade the Kingmaker”, demon, Dark Desires After Dusk

Pros:

–extremely loyal to his brother (which I found cute)

–orders ahead to get pre-packaged food for Holly to accommodate her OCD, while helping her Walk on the Wild Side

–was the first guy to 69 with his heroine in this series

–stalked Holly for like a year (stalking is love)

–gets adorably tongue-tied around her, but not in a lame way

Cons:

–lied to Holly for like… that entire book lmao (even though it was fun)

–is called the Womb Raider for a reason, apparently (a little tooooo potent)

–sort of fucks with Holly’s birth control, in the sense that he made sure she was super fertile, but to be fair Holly did not… actually… take birth control

–threw out Holly’s OCD meds, though I chalk this up to the year the book was published

–just sort of drove around giving Holly head for WEEKS while Rydstrom was getting sexually tortured, so like…. maybe doesn’t have GREAT priorities…. maybe has the best priorities… Rydstrom was fine…

6. Nikolai Wroth, vampire, The Warlord Wants Forever

Pros:

–deeply efficient and good at his job (being a bloodthirsty warlord), which turns his mate on as much as it should literally everyone else

–scars all over

–very family-oriented, which means he’s extreeeeemely daddy, and very much uses that in the bedroom

–will try to make nice with your bitchy sisters for you

–is receptive to therapy, even if the therapist was his beaten and bruised brother whose advice was basically “do better”

Cons:

–did steal Myst’s chain and used it to make her come on command; which, while I liked it, was very much non-consensual

–insecure about Myst’s history as the greatest femme fatale of the last couple millennia (though he gets better and decides to be a sex-positive feminist)

–that time that he turned his little brothers into vampires against their will

–was so down bad that he literally started to waste away when Myst didn’t let him get off for five years

–does not properly heat his manor

7. Sebastian Wroth, vampire, No Rest for the Wicked

Pros:

–basically a virgin when he meets Kaderin

–Gentleman in the Streets Freak in That Random Nightclub Where He SNAPS

–joined the mile high club remarkably fast

–throws out all his principles for her

–Speaks Like Dracula but in a “I vant to suck your clit” way

Cons:

–borderline beta, or as beta as a murderous centuries old vampire warlord can be

–a little tooooo accommodating of Kaderin’s bullshit

–could have been more demanding, to be honest (Bowen and Lachlain would noooot have been as patient as he was, which some would like but I was a little weary of)

[messyworldxx]

Echoes of Memories: Transition of Pandemic Life to New Normal

I thought 2020 was going to be as planned, yet, it was a year full of surprises and unplanned happenings. February 4, 2020, I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy named Arch Gabriel.

I was 19 that time and everything was new to me. Of course, as a first time mom, everything was overwhelming. I didn’t have a mom who could teach me things.

March 14,2020, there was news that there has been a virus called Corona Virus and needed to lock everything down for a week. Students and some are very happy because of course, no classes and work. But, there were lots of COVID cases and the lockdown needed to be extended. Everyone was curious, and kind of worried because people were not able to work and didn’t have money to support their everyday needs.

(ctto)

Meanwhile, I was recovering from giving birth and still getting used to being a mom and having a baby who is completely dependent on me. I was not able to go out for quite a while already and started to get very irritated with everything. Small things affected my mood big time and I cannot control how I react over things. Waking up every 2 hours to feed and change Arki’s diaper was getting exhausting for me. Washing the clothes, cleaning the house, and feeling imprisoned inside our house started to take away my happiness. I didn’t understand why I was acting that way when my one true dream since elementary came true, to become a mom. It was a long term dream of mine since I never had a mom growing up, I wanted to make my child feel and experience everything that I didn’t.

The news started to make me scared and anxious about everything. I was cleaning the house twice a day, washing my hands every hour and was very scared to go out. Mostly, I was scared that I was going to lose everyone due to the COVID outbreak. My father and I were always open about things. He was there when I could not control my tears and started crying non-stop. I did not sleep for three straight days because I was so scared that someone was going to die. I called Papa while crying, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t even speak and figured out the main reason why I was acting that way. Papa was very worried and kept on asking me what was happening until that same day, my OB Gynecology doctor told me that I might be experiencing Postpartum Depression. According to her, moms, especially the first time ones, mostly experience Postpartum Depression and it highly affects the mood of mothers.

I guess, having to spend a month inside our house without seeing anyone other than my baby made me feel like I was alone all throughout my journey of being a mom. Since that day, my Papa has become my comfort. Every time I feel like crying without any reason, I’ll just call him and he makes me feel comfortable and calm every time.

Fast forward to December of 2020, I was starting to get used to the routine of being a mom and having to stay inside the house due to COVID. Until, my aunt or godmother got sick unexpectedly and needed to be confined at Westlake Hospital. She had an infection with her blood and after a week, she died. She was my Papa’s first cousin and one of my favorite people. She was one of my second mothers and her death made me feel very sad. I was crying for a week and starting to ask God why it happened. I was questioning Him why my godmother, Ninang JJ, died. The thought of death scares me until today. It was 2 days after Christmas when she died, t’was the saddest holiday that I ever experienced. My Papa comforted me the whole time and explained to me that death doesn’t mean she left me, she will always be there looking over me. Until holidays passed, everything was starting to go back to normal, although we were still sad about the sudden passing of my godmother, we are now able to spend a day without crying.

My son, Archy, started learning new things, and babbling words like Mommy and Daddy. The experience of being a mother still excites me until now. His little achievements make me feel very proud. Yet, I still feel like there was a void inside me, my achiever self. I miss the achiever, studious, and active Nicole. I asked my Papa if I could go back to school. My father asked me to get my records and enrolled me again. I was very happy and thanked everyone, especially him.

It was a hot afternoon, the same day, when my stepmom called me and asked me to go to our house because apparently my father was having a high blood attack and didn’t want to go to hospital. She also asked me to buy medicine and I immediately left our house and went to the nearest pharmacy. It was the longest tricycle ride that I ever experienced. I felt like the time was so slow and it took a while for me to reach our house though it was just 5 minutes away. When I reached our house, I saw my father laying on the bed and he said “Oh, bakit ka nandito?” I said “Ayaw mo raw kasi magpadala sa hospital, halika na, hindi ka naman i-confine doon, para lang hindi na tayo kinakabahan.” He said okay and when he got up, he couldn't stand at all and I was very shocked. He was also mumbling the words when he spoke so I already knew that it was Stroke. I drove the car and we brought papa to the nearest hospital which is Evangelista Hospital. When we got there, everything was so fast. He got his CT scan and the doctors found out that there was bleeding on one part of his brain that is connected to his vital organs. He needed to be confined in the ICU, but since it was COVID the ICU was full during that time. The nurse set up an ICU at the emergency room. We were calling hospitals, hoping there would be a vacancy at their ICU, but there was none. We accepted the fact that he will be staying at the emergency room.

That night, April 28,2022, the doctor said he needed to be intubated because his oxygen is dropping already and I was the only one allowed to make decisions since I am already at the legal age and my mom was not there. I am an only child and came from a broken family, grew up with my Papa and we endured everything together. I asked the doctor if it was the only option and he said yes, so I signed the waiver and they intubated Papa. He was awake when he got intubated and I could hear him in pain during the procedure. I was praying and asking the Lord to comfort him. After that, I went to him and said “Papa, sorry ha? ‘Yan nalang daw kasi ang only option kaya ako nag yes. Laban tayo, Papa ha?” He couldn't react with his face but his foot was swaying back and forth and I knew that he was listening. My stepmom and I continuously assured him that we are there with him. I needed to go home because I needed to feed and prepare Archy for tomorrow since I knew that I would not be able to take care of him since Papa is in the hospital. I told Papa that I’ll be back. When I got back, the doctor was there checking on him. He was having a fever and about to have a heart attack when the doctor told me that he is now brain dead or comatose. He had no reactions and his body was withdrawing the medications that were given to him. The doctor’s exact words were “Sa sobrang critical po ni daddy, baka hindi na siya umabot mamayang hapon.” That exact moment I couldn’t feel anything at all. The doctor asked me if they will revive Papa if ever his heartbeat goes flat and I said no. Papa always wanted to have a peaceful death and no electricity at all. I immediately called our family and asked them to go there because of Papa’s condition. I went to Papa and whispered in his ears, “ Papa, hindi na po kita pinarevive ha? Alam ko nakikinig ka ngayon at alam ko na alam mo na mahal na mahal kita. Ikaw na po ang bahala, huwag mo ako alalalahanin kasi pinalaki mo ako na matapang, kaya ko ‘to.” A tear fell down on his left eye and I knew that he was still there, listening. I knew my Papa was listening to me that time, he was still with us. I couldn’t cry that time. All I could think about was I needed to be strong because Papa needs me. My aunts and uncles came and they bid their goodbyes to Papa one by one. When his last sibling bid her goodbye, his heartbeat went 5, 10, 15, but never flat. My other aunt said, “Kuya, okay na. Pahinga ka na, sino ba inaalala mo? Si Nicole, kami na ang bahala sa kaniya, hindi namin siya papabayaan.” After my aunt spoke the last word, his heartbeat went flat. I froze, it seemed like everything stopped. That exact moment, the only thing that was running in my mind was I am now alone.

I lost Papa, he left. He died. I hugged him until the St. Peter's staff came to get his body. I still can’t believe that he died. I couldn’t feel anything during that time. Honestly, I was in denial and when I saw him inside the coffin for the first time, I still cannot feel anything. I needed to sign papers for the funeral and such, I have a lot on my plate since I was the only one allowed to. People came and I was surprised to see that he had a lot of friends and people who loved him so dearly. Papa was the kindest person I knew but also the most introverted person. I did not expect that he would have a lot of friends. Everyone was saddened by his passing. I couldn't sleep that night, it felt so unreal. The second day of his burial, I kept on looking at him, making myself believe that it’s really him inside the coffin. Second night was the last night and that was the time that I cried. I cried very much because thinking that it would be the last night that I would get to spend with the person who became my anchor for 19 years, my person, my best friend, the person who never got tired of me, the only person who kept encouraging me and believing in me, My Papa. I cried non- stop and I kept calling him, asking him to wake up. The next day, everyone was very busy preparing for the funeral and I was there still crying. When we were at the cemetery and about to say our last goodbyes to Papa, I was really crying and shouting. It felt like my heart was going to explode because of what I was feeling. I lost my person, he is now gone and I cannot see him forever. That thought killed me, and it will always leave an empty space inside my heart.

 After that happened, everything never went back to normal. I still cry about him until today, remembering him and how he loved me so much still makes me miss him very much. I was so mad at my mom that time because she never came, even a glimpse, she did not say sorry to Papa for everything that she did. She was not there for me. I was all alone with Archy, my son. I kept asking God, “why me?” Why do I have to endure all this pain? What did I do wrong for Him to do all of these to me? I was so mad and felt like everyone was going to leave me. I pushed everyone away. It was still pandemic, so I used that time to isolate myself from everyone. I promised myself not to put myself back to that situation again wherein someone will leave me and I’ll feel broken and lost. As a result, I isolated myself.

Not until my 20th Birthday, May 16, 2021, my family greeted me and asked me if I would like to celebrate my birthday with Papa at the cemetery since it’s been almost a month since he died. I said yes, and started asking for help. I told them that I was not feeling well like I used to before. I told them about my thoughts, and my aunt who is in Canada asked me if I want to get checked by a Psychiatrist. At first, it was hard for me to say yes since I was in denial and I told myself that I am okay and I can do everything on my own. But then, my aunt said, “Hindi naman dahil nagpa-check ka ay baliw ka. You are okay and what you’re feeling is valid. You just need help to overcome those feelings kasi para sa anak mo rin at sarili mo. Archy needs you.” That was my wake up call, my son needs me. He needs a mom and I remembered my forgotten promise to never abandon my son and make him feel alone like what my mom did to me. All my life, I continuously lose the people that I love and because of that, I always felt like every time there is someone who genuinely loves and cares for me, they’ll also leave one day. I always felt like something bad was going to happen and that made me feel very anxious about my environment. The doctor prescribed me a sleeping pill which will help me sleep every time I can't. She also referred me to a counselor and the counselor asked me to write everything that I feel including my thoughts down to a notebook, and I did. I wrote everything from the anger that I am feeling for my mom, that I get scared that someone I love will leave again, that I felt alone since Papa died, that I still blame and doubt myself because of the decisions that I made when he was still in the hospital, that I question God why He is doing these things to me. I wrote everything down then I burned it.

After that, I realized like I never had to endure all the pain alone, I have people who continuously believe in me aside from Papa, I have Archy who needs and looks up to me. Then, I realized that everything has its purpose. Papa always wanted me to go back to school and after he settled my school fees, he died. Maybe, that was his last mission here on Earth. Second, I got pregnant early maybe because God knew that I needed someone whom I can hold on to and that will keep me going because Papa will die earlier than expected, and that’s my son, Archy. Everything that is happening around us has their own purposes and we should never question the Lord. I excelled at my subjects and joined competitions that I enjoy while also working at night and being a mom 24/7. The COVID virus is still in the Philippines together with its new variants, yet, the cases are slowly getting controlled and slowly getting back to normal. We are now allowed to go to malls, buy groceries without the need of a quarantine pass, but still need to be cautious with our actions since there is still a virus everywhere. I still miss Papa, but the thought of him being with Jesus without the feeling of any worry, pain, etc. makes me happy. I am indeed proud that he raised a strong, independent, and brave woman.

Looking back, maybe the reason why I needed to go through all the pain is for me to learn, discover, be stronger, and strengthen my faith with the Lord. I never knew that I could move on from all of the pain that I endured. However, thinking about what happened during the 2 years lockdown, everything was so fast. While the state of our country is going back to its normal routine before pandemic, the lessons that the COVID virus taught me are unforgettable. I really enjoy being a mom of a 2 years old beautiful baby boy, Archy. I am having fun being the Vice President Internal of a wonderful organization. I love working for my company. Lastly, I am enjoying the journey of being me. Life may not be perfect, yet it has a lot of lessons to learn. I may not have everything that I want, but I have all that I need. I may not get the highest grades in class, but there are lots of things that I am grateful for. I may not be the perfect mother, but my son is growing beautifully.

The pandemic may have left us with emptiness, broken hearts, painful memories, but it also left us with realizations and lessons that other situations can not. While things are slowly getting better, I will never forget how this pandemic changed my life. The pain is still here, especially the pain of losing Papa, but I know that slowly, everything will get better.

This is Nicole Aubrey Canarias. A mom, daughter, grandchild, niece, employee, student, and fighter. I survived throughout and I know that I always will. I will end this essay with a quote that I read in a book. It says, “I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship.” Every challenge is an opportunity to learn and grow. Life is full of storms; it is your response to each storm that determines where you eventually end up. Keep on fighting, love. Life goes on and there are lots of things to be grateful for. 

[moonxknightx]

𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐀𝐋𝐖𝐀𝐘𝐒 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔 (𝐏𝐓.𝟓)

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 --- Jonathan Levy x F!Reader ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄 --- Slight angst, fluff and smut ;) ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐌 --- Scenes From A Marriage ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 --- Smut, 18+ content, piv sex, first time sleeping together, soft smut, cowgirl, missionary, breeding kink, Reader is on birth control, i think that’s it?? ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘 --- After ignoring his calls and texts for two days, Jonathan decides to visit your apartment in hopes you will talk to him.

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝟒 | 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝟓 | 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝟔

YOU HAD IGNORED ALL HIS CALLS AND TEXTS. Because you were jealous. God that’s pathetic.

It’s been two days since Jonathan got a call from Mira. Two days since you kind of walked away from Jonathan.

You knew that you were overreacting, but you just couldn’t help it. The jealousy you felt once you saw it was Mira calling Jonathan.

And the feeling you got when Jonathan told Mira that he would be there in half an hour. While he was with you.

You weren’t even mad at Jonathan. You could never be mad at Jonathan. You just felt sad he chose Mira over you at that moment.

Did he still love her? Was the first thought that came to mind and you hated it. Absolutely hated it.

That’s why you tried to distance yourself from Jonathan. Because what if he did still love Mira? You were only being in the way then, right?

“Please call me (y/n). Please. Let me talk to you.” Jonathan’s voice spoke through your phone. It was the seventh voice mail you got today.

You sighed and pressed the delete button. You were about to turn off the lights and go to bed until you heard something near your window in the living room.

Slowly, you turned around and walked to the window. Carefully you pushed the curtains aside and looked outside to see…Jonathan?

He was waving at you while holding small stones in his other hand. What the hell? What in the high school movies was this? You thought while opening the window.

“Please let me in. Let me explain it to you. Please.” Jonathan yelled. You tried your best not to smile which was difficult due to the fact that Jonathan was currently standing below your window, begging for you to let him in, purely just to talk to you.

“Go to the entrance.” You yelled back before closing the window again. You quickly ran towards the intercom next to your front door and pressed one of the buttons which opened the door downstairs.

“Thank you!” You heard Jonathan’s voice yell, causing you to smile a tiny bit.

You waited for Jonathan to come upstairs and once he was, you opened the door for him and let him enter your apartment.

“Thank you.” Jonathan sighed once you closed the door again. “No problem.” You said softly while heading towards the kitchen.

Jonathan quickly followed after you and watched how you pulled two wine glasses out of a cabinet.

“You want a drink?” You asked, not even looking up at him. “Yes please.” Jonathan answered while looking at you.

He watched how you grabbed a bottle of red wine and poured him a glass before handing it over to him.

When your own glass was filled as well, Jonathan dared to take a sip of his wine, you following suit.

It was quiet for a moment. Bot not really knowing what to say. Until Jonathan cleared his throat.

“I’m sorry (y/n).” He said while looking at you. You finally met his gaze and it seemed like the world had stopped for a moment.

It was then that you realized how much you’ve actually missed him these past few days.

“I’m sorry that i had to leave you the other day. I really am. I just- Mira sounded so…”

“Why did she call you?” You asked suddenly. Jonathan furrowed his eyebrows.

“What?” He asked.

“Why did she call you and not one of her friends?” You asked, feeling the jealousy build up again.

“I-i don’t know.” Answered Jonathan truthfully.

“Do you still love her?” You asked while folding your arms.

“What?” Chuckled Jonathan while looking at you, thinking you were joking.

“Well? Do you?” You frowned, letting Jonathan know that you, in fact, weren’t joking.

“What no of course not! God how could i still love her after everything she’s done?” Jonathan asked out loud with a faint smile on his face.

“Then why did you leave me…for her?” You asked quietly. That question broke Jonathan’s heart. He would never leave you for Mira. It was never his intention to make you feel like he did either.

“I would never leave you for Mira.” Jonathan said.

“But you did.”

“No i didn’t. (Y/n) look at me. Mira is unstable okay? She has been for awhile now. And as the mother of my child, i do somehow still care for her. Do you understand that?” He asked while looking at you.

“Yeah.”

“Good. Listen, the fact that i care for her, doesn’t mean i still love her because i don’t.” Jonathan continued.

“How can you be so sure of that?” You asked quietly. Jonathan laughed. He wholeheartedly laughed before walking around your kitchen island so he was standing in front of you.

He grabbed your face with both of his hands while looking down at you.

“Because i’m already in love with someone else.” Jonathan smiled softly.

“Who?” You asked in barely a whisper, causing Jonathan to chuckle.

“With you of course!” Jonathan smiled while cupping your cheeks.

“What?” You asked suddenly. You were definitely on cloud 9 right now.

Jonathan chuckled while shaking his head. “It’s you! It’s always been you! Since the moment you came up to me in the parking lot, saying you were worried about me, i just knew it was you. I love you (y/n). God i really do. And saying it like this makes me feel like a teenager all over again. God this is embarrassing, so i’m just gonna stop talking now.” Jonathan rambled before quickly looking away from you, avoiding your gaze.

“I love you too Jonathan.” You suddenly said, taking him off guard. “You do?” He asked softly. You nodded, causing Jonathan to smile.

“I’d really like to kiss you now…can i kiss you?” Jonathan asked while looking down at you, still holding your face in his hands.

“Yes you can kiss me.” You giggled. Jonathan’s lips curled up in a even wider smile and smashed his lips against yours, causing you to stumble back a bit.

Luckily the kitchen island was there to catch you. You immediately wrapped your arms around Jonathan’s neck while pressing yourself against him, wanting to feel him as close as possible.

“Fuck i’ve wanted to do this for so long.” Murmured Jonathan once he pulled away from your lips to catch his breath.

“Me too.” You said while pressing your forehead against his.

“I’m really sorry that i made you feel like i chose Mira over you. Because i would never, ever do that, i would always choose you first, always.” Explained Jonathan before kissing you again.

Jonathan moved his hands from your cheeks to your waist and from your waist to your ass. “Jump.” He said into the kiss, while grabbing your ass.

You did as Jonathan told and jumped. He was quick to lift you onto the kitchen island while pushing your legs apart so he could stand between them.

“Is this okay?” Jonathan asked while pulling away from the kiss to look at you.

You frantically nodded. “Yes.”

Jonathan chuckled before pulling you back into him. He could literally kiss you for hours and never grow tired of you. Which is exactly what he did.

At one point, Jonathan succeeded in lifting you into his arms and carrying you to your bedroom where he continued to kiss you.

And then after awhile, both of your clothes had disappeared while you were on top of Jonathan.

“Are you sure this is what you want?” Asked Jonathan while aligning his hard cock at your entrance.

You nodded. “I’m sure.”

Jonathan placed a gentle kiss on your cheek before pushing into you, causing both of you to gasp at the feeling.

“Oh shit!” You cursed while digging your nails in Jonathan’s chest.

“Are you okay darling?” Asked Jonathan quickly. “Yeah it’s just sensitive. Don’t stop though, just go slow please.” You breathed while pressing your forehead against Jonathan’s.

“Of course.” Smiled Jonathan softly while placing his hands on your hips, slowly guiding you up and down his cock, causing you to moan.

“Shitttt….it feels so good.” You moaned while throwing your head back slightly.

Jonathan bit his lip while digging his nails in your hips. “You’re so warm and tight.” He grunted while thrusting his hips upwards which caused you to fall over.

You buried your face in Jonathan’s neck and tried to keep your voice down.

“Here let me.” Jonathan offered before switching positions with you so he was on top this time.

He slowly pushed his cock back into your pussy and thrusted into you at a slow but deep pace.

“Don’t stop.” You begged Jonathan as he fucked into you.

“I won’t. Not until i’ve made you come.” Jonathan groaned while looking between your bodies to see his cock disappear in the confines of your wet cunt.

“Fuck i think i’m close.” You managed to say between moans while also looking at the way Jonathan’s dick disappeared into your pussy.

“Yeah? Are you gonna come for me?” Asked Jonathan while speeding up his thrusts, causing your mouth to fall wide open.

“Yesss.” You moaned while your legs started to shake, letting both you and Jonathan know that you were only seconds away from coming.

“Go on sweetheart. Come over my cock.” Jonathan grunted while fucking into you as deep as he could.

Within seconds, you had released all over Jonathan’s cock with a high pitched moan, which also immediately sent Jonathan over the edge.

“Fill me up Jonathan.” You moaned softly. Jonathan did as you asked him to and came inside of you, painting your inner walls white with his cum.

“Fuck!” Groaned Jonathan as he filled you up with his cum while helping you ride out your orgasm.

“That was…” You started while staring at the ceiling. “Amazing.” Jonathan finished while looking down at you, meeting your eyes.

“It really was.” You smiled. Jonathan cupped one of your cheeks before leaning down to kiss you.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him closer to you, if that was even possible at this point.

Jonathan chuckled into the kiss and collapsed on top of you. “I’m sorry.” He muttered shyly.

“Don’t apologize.” You smiled while cupping his cheek.

Jonathan gave you a quick peck on your lips before pulling away from you, wanting to pull out of you, but you were quick to pull him back into you, causing Jonathan to laugh.

“What are you doing sweetheart?” He chuckled. “Don’t pull out yet. I like feeling you.” You muttered while burying your face in his neck.

Jonathan smiled and nodded. “Okay.”

“Are you tired?” He asked after a moment of silence. You nodded. “A bit. You?”

Jonathan nodded as well. “You can stay the night here if you wish to.” You spoke quietly while wrapping your arms around Jonathan’s waist.

“Would you like me to stay?” Jonathan asked softly. You nodded.

“Then i will stay.” Jonathan smiled before kissing the top of your head.

“Good night darling. I love you.” Jonathan smiled proudly while looking down at you.

“Good night Jonathan. I love you too. Very much.” You murmured before closing your eyes, quickly drifting off into a deep sleep as did Jonathan, in the warm confines of your arms.

(A/N): It happened guys! It finally happened! I really, really hope you all enjoyed this chapter cuz i sure did while writing it! Thank you so much for reading❤️

Tags 🏷️: @lucianadraven32 @sunshytea @graciexmarvel @theimaginarylady @oscarisaacsspit @ethanhoewke @quixscentsposts @mccn-bcys

[montanababe7]

Holy 💩🤯

Reading this book has brought so many aha 😤 moments to my attention. I was told by a friend just a few months after mike and I, got married that when she first had met me-she said I was acting like I was 16 (even though I was 27 years old. Here’s something most of you don’t know. My birth mother demanded that I call and text her every day. Let’s just put it this way-the restrictions of c o v I d 19 were nothing compared to the nightmare level of 27 years worth of control that woman had on me. One minute, when I was doing exactly what she wanted me to do-I heard from Jesus according to her and the moment, I decided to not listen to her-suddenly she compared me to a d e m o n. Her text messages after getting married to my wonderful husband; they were so toxic and mean, that one day for my own mental health and sanity, I decided to block her from all forms of social media.)

So. To those of you-whether you be a family member or a friend, and you don’t understand why on earth I don’t speak to that creature. This is just a teeny tiny minuscule piece of just one of the many long; and exhausting sad chapters of my life during basically three decades worths.

Now you all know why my children don’t know their grandmother. It is for their own protection. I will never allow that woman to ever hurt them-the way she hurt me. It is my job as a mom to protect them.

My dad has been great. He and Becki, have been amazing and loving in my life, Michael’s life, and in our children’s lives. I can never thank my dad and Becki for all they’ve done for us. Dad is one of the biggest reasons why I’m still here and alive today. After I had Bella, I wanted to end it all. My dad’s gentle loving heart and kind nature had stopped me taking my own life.

Mike is forever grateful to you dad that his wife is still alive and is here with him to this day.

Oofda. That was a heavy.

Jesus take the blessed wheel.

Jesus is amazing

I pray my birth mother receives help. I truly do.

Now you all know more. Thank you for listening and for caring🙏🏼

-Jessica Wolf

[finelinevogue]

Can you write something about when Harry and Y/N broke up but fans speculate that they got back together and they did get back together. They broke over something stupid, please. You don’t have to do this exactly it can be something like that.

let’s see how this turns out! hope it’s what you wished for?!

The last few months had been rough.

What had started as rumours of a breakup between everyones favourite couple, you and Harry, had turned into an actual breakup.

It had started by Harry spending more time with Olivia, due to press for Don’t Worry Darling. They were always hanging out with each other, even when there was no publicity stunt telling them to. You found it appropriate at first, wanting the movie to gain some form of reputation, but after a while you believed it turned South. It was becoming a definite friendship and not just because they had to. It was the way that Harry would bring Olivia over for dinner without checking with you first, or taking the dog for a walk with her not you, or even staying longer out on stunts than they needed to just because they wanted to.

So you challenged Harry on it. Hell, even the tabloids were challenging you both - claiming Harry had split from you for Olivia. You made him question whether he thought his actions were irresponsible and appropriate or not, to which he thought there was nothing wrong and thought you were being irrational. You didn’t speak to him for the rest of the day, only to find him later on the phone speaking to Olivia about how crazy you’d been acting about it all. So you showed him crazy and walked out.

Until today.

For over a half a year your sister had her wedding planned and Harry was supposed to be your guest. You were nervous about turning up without him, because your family were very judgy. Your sister couldnt help being the smarter and the prettier one, but she also didn’t have to parade it around so everyone knew of it. Your mum and dad thought you a disappointment for the longest time, but once you’d gotten a job and had moved out they were a bit more loving over you. Still didn’t hide the fact they desperately hoped for you to have a relationship. It wasn’t that you were bringing Harry along to prove that someone loved you, but more to prove that they would never fully be satisfied whether you had a boyfriend or not. There would always be a podium stand slightly lower for you to stand on.

However, they didn’t know about the breakup.

“Y/N, nice to see you. Where’s Harry?” Another guest asked you, relatives of your mum. It was the same question over and over again, no one really caring about how you are but instead whether you’re in a positive relationship.

“Oh um I think he’s just running a bit late.” Was your chosen answer to respond to said question. It was repetitive, but it kept people off your back.

The wedding was completely beautiful. It was in a beautiful church and was decorated to perfection. The theme was white and royal blue, something your sister had always dreamed of. Children played amongst the pews and family relatives mumbled to each other about gossip. There was still a heavy sadness to the event. Maybe it was because your sister hadn’t asked you to be a bridesmaid - instead, choosing her best friends instead - or maybe it was because you missed Harry so much.

He’d fucked up. He really had, but it didn’t take away that burning passion for him that spread like a wildfire in your belly. You missed him. You still loved him. Worst of all, you had to pretend everything was all alright in front of your family when actually you were breaking apart inside.

Harry hadn’t messaged saying that he was or wasn’t coming, but after everything that had happened you were confident he was going to be a no show, and you would be the embarrassment of the family once again. Your relationship had been very private and exclusive, but Harry’s fans were so investigative you wouldn’t be surprised if they knew that you’d broken up and were aware that you were at a wedding today without him. Neither of you had made a public statement about your breakup, but neither of your wanted to damage each other even more. Fans suspected though and rumours travel fast.

“Y/N how are you doing? How’s Harry?” Another aunt came and asked you, this time with your mother in tow.

“Oh he’s great, yes.” You smiled forcefully, not actually having a clue how your ex-boyfriend was doing. You didn’t keep up with his social media because you were afraid of what you might find.

“Where is he? Is he here?” Your aunt asked.

“He’s late, apparently.” Your mother answered for you, sneeringly. “You’ll be made a fool of if he’s a no show Y/N.”

“I know.”

“I hope everything goes well for you both.” Your aunt kindly said, before waiting for your mum to say something nice too. That was a mistake though.

“Well it’s unlikely she’ll find someone again!” Your mother laughed and pulled your aunt away from you. You furrowed your eyebrows and let your heart sink low.

What were you thinking, letting Harry go like that? Your mum was right, you were never going to find anyone else again. You were so lucky with Harry. He was so kind and so patient with you, but obviously he’d run out of steam towards the end. It doesn’t surprise you. You’ve always been told you’re a mighty handful and you need a lot of work put into looking after you, so you understand why you were probably too much for Harry. The showbiz life had never really been something you’d completely submerged yourself into, whereas you guess for Olivia it was rooted in her from birth. She understood Harry’s world the same way he did hers. They would match perfectly for each other, if that’s what they wanted.

You watched the room continue as usual, but you couldn’t keep yourself here. There was too much sadness welling deep within you that you wanted to just run and then keep running. So you did, only to get as far as the bench in the front courtyard. The outside felt calmer and more freeing than inside, you sat and absorbed it for a while, not realising that you were crying until your pretty multicoloured dress had grown darker with a pool of your tears.

“Shit.” You tried rubbing the tears out, but only made you cry a little harder. You thought about your makeup running and tried to compose yourself, fanning your face to calm it down from the heat now.

“And here I was thinking weddings were supposed to be happy.”

You stopped fanning your face to look at him. You couldn’t believe he was standing there, dressed in a beautiful white suit and salmon pink shirt underneath to compliment the colours of your dress - the outfit that you’d helped him pick out over a year ago. He’d remembered. He trusted that you’d still be wearing this dress. He was a sight alright. A vision of beauty and love.

“Harry?” You questioned, wiping your under eyes to clear away any running mascara, not quite believing he was standing there.

“So what was it? Bad music playing? No vodka? Or maybe there’s nowhere for you to escape to go read the book I know you have stuffed away in your clutch bag.” He stood at a distance from you, hands in his trouser pockets, to make sure you were comfortable.

“I brought vodka instead of the book.” You chuckled, reaching into your clutch to prove it to him.

“Lucky for you, i’ve come to save the day.” Harry reached to the inside of his blazer pocket and pulled out a Kindle. You’d always been debating whether or not to buy one, because the feeling of having a book to turn its’ physical pages is a feeling second to none. “Take it, it’s yours.”

Harry handed it out to you and you stood up to reach for it hesitantly. Harry assured you that it was okay and that you’d been reading too many books if you thought it was a trap of some sort.

“Thank you, Harry.” You spoke sincerely. You stroked your thumb over the cover and turned the case lid over to start up the screen. The screen lit up and it was set to a picture of your favourite quote, annotated just as you would have in your own book. You chuckled and let a few tears drop from the kindness of all of this.

“And then…” Harry unlocked the Kindle with your birthday as the password, before clicking on the library so you could discover what was waiting for you on your virtual shelves. Harry had downloaded all your most favourite books, whilst also downloading the ones he knew had been on your to-be-read list. He’d even added a few of his favourite books too, just because you liked reading his recommendations.

You smiled, but felt so lost.

“W-why are you here, H?” You asked, closing the lid and bravely looking up into his enchanting eyes. You had to control yourself not to comment on how wondrous they looked.

“To save the day.” He chuckled in repeat, until he knew you weren’t taking that for an answer. “Because I fucked up. Big league time.”

“Yeah.” You whispered, looking down at your shoes to see that they weren’t that far apart at all. He was so close to you, yet he wasn’t yours to catch.

“And i’ll never forgive myself for letting you walk out of that door. The promotion shit with Olivia? Done. I’ve finished. I explained that the movie isn’t as important to me as you. You,” Harry paused to breathe out, and took the risk of guiding your jaw up to meet your gaze with his soft hand, “you are real Y/N. You’re so important and key to my life and it bloody terrified me, still does actually, to think that you make me feel this way. I want everything with you. Marriage, kids, a home. A life. I was so worried I would screw it all up, though, to the point where I did screw it all up. I lost you and so I lost me. It’s selfish of me to ask whether any part of your heart still wants me, but—”

“Yes.” You quickly interjected before he could say something he’d later regret. “There is, yes.”

“R-really?” He stumbled over his response, not expecting you to react so soon but his words had got to you. His feelings were vulnerable and raw and it reminded you of how much you love him and feel safe with him.

“Why? Would you like me to say different.” You teased.

“No,” Harry rushed, stepping closer towards you, “God now. Stay, please. Forever, if you’ll have me?”

“I can deal with forever.” You leaned up to where his lips were, craving the taste of them against yours so badly. “Can I?” You looked between his lips and his eyes, watching his eyes coo in admiration of you. His arms snaked around your neck and cupped the back of your head, resting his ringed fingers against your skin delicately.

“You don’t have to ask, angel.” And with that you didn’t hesitate to reclaim your clips on his. He tasted as sweet and as soft as you could remember. The hint of mint sweets he kept in his car could be tasted all over his mouth, and he could no doubt taste the vodka on yours. He took no time in rushing to have his tongue exploring your mouth once mouth, biting on your lip when he got the chance to. He wanted you to remember this moment and how much love he has for you, and always will. Just as you do for him.

Hesitantly pulling away you smiled at him cheekily, feeling so much lighter and happier to have him here. With you in his arms so expertly.

“What?” He asked, leaving a quick kiss to your nose, inhaling his scent as he did.

“Just can’t believe you’re here.” You stroked his cheek with your thumb, and he leaned into your touch so comfortably. He had missed you so damn much, and it showed.

“Let you down once before and I wasn’t going to do it again.”

“So you’d have shown up even if I hadn’t?”

“Not happily, but yes.” He laughed thinking about it.

“Why?” You laughed with him.

“I’ve got to make my impression on your family somehow. Need to remind some of them how amazing and beautiful their special Y/N L/N is.”

“Some are going to need a lot more persuading than others.” You sighed, side-frowning over your words.

“No offence, but anyone who doesn’t treat you as a fucking diamond doesn’t deserve you and should watch out for kick up their backside from me.” You laughed over his empty threat and buried your head against his chest, listening to the heartbeat and rumble of laughter that came from within. This moment alone felt like home. Safe and warm.

“I love you, H.”

“Bloody love you too.”

Harry ended up returning to the wedding with you, much to your mothers surprise, and you both enjoyed the celebrations together. You shut yourselves out from everybody and just danced, talked and drank the night away.

You were so in love.

Later, photos got leaked of the wedding and it showed you and Harry dancing away in one of the backgrounds of the photos. It was supposed to be a shot of just the bride and groom, but you two have managed to get caught in it. You looked so caught up in each other that you still weren’t even aware the photo had been taken. You and Harry had determinedly avoided the camera all night, exactly for this reason, but a part of you was kind of happy that this one photo got leaked, because it showed the world that Harry was yours and you were his. It showed that you were together, or back-together as addressed by some FBI fans, and that you were stronger for it.

[shokobuns]

“𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐭”

in which you slowly give into your desires.

PAIRING: maid!zenin maki x f!housewife!reader

GENRE: smut, some fluff, some angst, slowburn (ish)

WORD COUNT: 5.6k

WARNINGS: nsfw, 16+ smut, slowburn ish?, mentioned misogyny, infidelity, unhappy arranged marriage, angsty marriage, overstimulation, fingering, oral (f receiving), kitchen sex, sex in shared bed, face sitting/riding, 69, exhibitionism, squirting, light degradation, praise, pussy slapping, finger sucking, spit kink, consensual panty stealing, masturbation (f), first time for oral, slight corruption, implied dumbification, dom!maki. slight mommy kink, humiliation (kind of)

“I love you.”

“Love you, too, Honey.”

You peck your husband on the lips goodbye before he’s out the door with a briefcase in hand and his suit as neat as ever. Staring at the leftovers, you sigh before eventually picking up the plates and pilling them in the sink, scrubbing off the sticky mess of maple syrup. Soap suds cover up your gloves as you lather them in bubbly water and plan out the rest of your day. The dishes, the laundry, a few episodes of that one show you barely pay attention to, lunch, more dishes, more laundry, a start on dinner.

You can’t help but wonder — Is this it?

You love your husband, something you remind yourself repeatedly when he’s gobbling down on the rice on his dinner plate and when he’s leaving his dirty clothes all over your bedroom floor. You love him. You want to bear his children, want to raise them, want to do the chores so that he doesn’t. You want to cook, to clean, to do everything for the sake of his pleasure. It’s what your mother insisted, it’s what she did, and it’s what her mother did. You love your husband.

Is this it?

Twenty years old, a husband with a stable living, something that can suffice for the rest of your life. All you need is to do your chores, give him your body, be his prim and proper wife. It sounds fairly easy, another thing that your mother insisted, so what is it?

Why do you crave more? Why do you have to remind yourself that you love him, love this life at all?

Your thoughts are interrupted by a knock on your door. When you open it, you’re met with the sight of a tall girl with glasses. She’s in a black maid dress that stops at her knees, complemented by the white apron that flows along with the part of the skirt, ruffling at the end. She has a bag hanging on her shoulder and her expression shows slight amusement at your surprise. Surely, she’s at the wrong house, right?

“Are you (Y/N)?”

“Y-Yes,” you stutter out, not realizing that you were staring, “Uh, w-who are you?”

“I’m Zenin Maki, but you can call me Maki,” she observes your figure, noticing the sly nervousness radiating off of your expression, “Your husband hired me. Said he wanted someone to help you out.”

“O-Oh.”

“May I come in?”

“Of course.” You move to the side, watching the woman scan your house. It’s slightly messy, a result of your husband not cleaning up after lounging in the living room, and she doesn’t waste time to clean it up, rearranging the decorative pillows and helping you carry the leftover dishes to the sink. Just as you’re about to put on your gloves, her hand comes out to grab your wrist and the other takes it out of your hand. “Don’t. I got this.”

You step back, watching Maki put on the gloves herself, lathering the dishes as you did before. You don’t know what to do, standing there awkwardly as she places them in the dishwasher. It’s a given opportunity to observe how her skirt stops right above her knee, flowing out naturally and modestly accentuating her body. Her headband compliments the look, her hair tied back with bangs covering up her forehead, stopping short of her glasses. Warmth creeps up your neck to your cheeks and you sharply look away, focusing your vision on the bowl of apples on the center of the dining table.

“You can rest, Miss. But I’m going to need help putting away the dishes later. Is that okay?” She asks and you turn around to give her a nod. “Is there anything else you need done?”

“Oh, no, it’s okay, you really don’t need to-”

“I was hired to help you out with chores. Please, do not worry about me.”

You sigh in defeat, looking directly at her face, her pretty face. She had a sharp expression, piercing eyes that can bore into your soul, defined cheekbones. A sensation of uneasiness rested in your lower belly and you realize you’re staring when she waves a hand over your face. “Hello? Miss?”

“S-Sorry! I was just thinking about something!”

“Oh. Well, I was just asking if you can help me put some of the dishes away just for today. I don’t know where everything is and I don’t like disorganization.”

“Of course. Of course.”

“You need anything else?”

“Folding the laundry, for now, I think? The clothes should be dry. Everything is upstairs.”

She follows behind you as you bring her out to the terrace where your laundry hangs on a string. Dresses, button ups, and ties of earth toned colors adorn the area and you touch the fabrics. The sun had definitely done its job. Maki is already setting up the ironing board that was previously laying in the corner of your bedroom and gathering your husband’s work attire together. When she’s done flattening the creases on the pieces of clothing, you take them, hanging and folding. With her help, you were finished in half the time it usually took you.

“Thank you, Maki. Really, I appreciate it.”

“You don’t need to thank me, Miss. Your husband hired me to do my job and I am happy to help.”

As you hang your last dress, you give her a smile.  

—

“Honey, I’m home!”

Your husband’s voice sounds throughout the house as he’s met with the sight of you and Maki laying out plating foods and placing them on the dinner table. He smiles and you walk towards him to greet him with a hug and a kiss. Maki continues with the task, sparing a glance at the both of you. “You didn’t tell me you hired a maid,” you whisper to your husband, “Though, she has been very helpful.”

“I’m glad, Honey.” He replies, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“Kind of curious as to why you hired one in the first place.”

“I’ll tell you later. Let’s have dinner, alright?” He shoots you a grin before looking over to Maki. “Feel free to stay for dinner, Maki!”

“I’m alright. I should get going anyways—”

“Nonsense!” You husband eagerly responds, pulling out an extra chair just for her, “My dear wife here says you’ve been helpful.”

“I have classes.”

“Oh. Well you might as well take some home!” You suggest, walking over to your tupperware cabinet.

Before you go back to your husband, you plate some food for her to take home and make sure she makes it back to her car as she walks out the door. You let out an involuntary sigh, leaning against the doorway and feeling content that you now have an extra hand.

“So?”

“So, what?”

“Why do we need a maid?”

“Simple,” he grabs your hands from across the table, “I think we’re ready.”

“Ready for what?”

“Ready to have kids, silly woman!” His laughter booms throughout the entire room, “I mean you’ll have to get off birth control and everything, but I think it’s time.”

You laugh nervously as he leans in for a kiss. “Honey, don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t know about this.”

“What?” He stands up, his eyebrows furrowed together in confusion, “Why not?”

“I’m just kind of, uh, scared? I don’t know if I’m ready and we just got married a few months ago, you know?”

“Come on, don’t be scared,” he reassures you, kissing your cheek, “I hired Maki to be our maid to lay the stress off of you. I offered her an in-house job, which she’ll be starting next week, just so that you could rest easy while you’re pregnant.”

“In-house? Is she going to live with us?”

“Of course! She’s a college student, so she doesn’t mind getting paid and living in a house,” he explains before going back to the topic, “So please. I want you to have our baby. We can start tonight.” He suggests, wiggling his eyebrows.

“O-Okay.”

—

The next few days, the cycle continues.

Maki comes in the morning, usually just about right before your husband leaves for work, and she helps you throughout the day. Doing dishes, folding clothes, cleaning the bathroom. Most of the time you help her, usually against her will, but it leads to a calm and comforting silence when you work together. She’s moving in soon, two days to be exact, and you think it’s time to get to know a little bit about her.

One problem; She’s reserved, which intimidates you, and you’re too scared to start a conversation.

Eventually, you’re going to have to break the ice. So you do it as she’s ironing the clothes and you’re putting them away. You think up a few basic questions, mulling them over as to not make her uncomfortable because you want to get to know her.

“My husband tells me you’re in university right now. What’s your major?”

“Sports science.” She replies bluntly, continuing her task.

“Oh, cool cool,” you try to figure out a way to continue, but come up blank. Maybe she doesn’t want to talk.

“What do you do when your husband is not around?” She asks curiously, as if she sensed your desire to hold the conversation.

“Chores, usually,” you frown, “Sometimes I watch TV, but I wish I was able to do other stuff. I really like painting, too. But I haven’t done much of that ever since we got married.”

“Oh. Why not?”

“Well, I’ve always wanted to become an artist. I’ve been doing it since I was a kid, but my family wanted stability for me so they introduced me to a family friend’s older son,” you smile, memories of your younger self filling up your head before a sense of sadness falls over your expression, “They said this would be good for me. And it is. My husband is a good man, I have a roof over my head and dinner on the table everyday, you know. I’m not complaining,” you pause, reeling out of your own thoughts, “Sorry if I just overshared.”

“No, don’t worry about it,” she reassures you, “Just out of curiosity, how old are you?”

“Twenty.”

“That’s funny, I’m twenty one.”

“You’re closer to my age than my husband,” you laugh, folding another white button up before placing it in a drawer, “We are in very different positions.”

“Yes, we are,” she chuckles, “A struggling college student and a cool housewife.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say cool—”

“Nonsense!” She grumbles, an attempt to mock your husband.

“Nonsense!”

“Nonsense!”

The both of you laugh and you realize how she seems almost angelic. The look in her eyes that was once piercing and intimidating was soft and heavenly. Her cheeks are flushed red and her smile was alluring. Before you even realize it, a feeling of warmth settles in your lower belly and it gets harder and harder to take your eyes off of her. Her chuckle was music to your ears and you’ve internally decided that it was one of your favorite sounds.

—

“Goodnight, Honey.”

He plants a kiss on your sweaty forehead before turning his back towards you, opting to hug a pillow on the side instead. Everything is wet, sticky, and gross, but before you can say anything, your husband is already fast asleep, little snores filling the air of the master bedroom. You lay down for a few minutes, staring at the ceiling in the dark until you gather up the last of your willpower to get up and clean the mess between your legs.

It was an okay night.

Sure, you came, but it was just boring. There was nothing to it, only the huffs and groans and praises from your husband as he lived out his fantasy of finally being able to breed you. You’re happy to provide him, as long as it makes him happy, because he loves you and you love him. Even if you have to clean up the mess yourself, even if you don’t finish, even if that rush of loving emotion that everyone seems to describe never hits you.

You’re happy.

That’s what you tell yourself anyways. Yet, your fingers rub furiously on your clit while the other pumps in and out of your dripping cunt. You’re close and you pretend that it’s her fingers You pretend that it’s her fingers that you’re clenching around, her mouth leaving soft kisses from your neck down to your exposed breasts. You pretend that you’re tugging on dark hair, asking for more, but when you come down from your high, the ringing in your ears stops suddenly and the snores overtake your hearing once again.

Maki.

It’s wrong, disgustingly wrong, but there’s no way to escape her. Not when she’s in your house in the morning, the afternoon, and the evening. She helps with everything, things that you didn’t even consider yourself, talks to you about the things you like. And you know that her favorite color is black, her family would have much rather preferred if she went the same route you did, and she likes junk food a little too much.

You also wonder when you should tell your husband that you definitely have not gone off those pills.

—

“Miss?”

“Yes?” You respond, a grocery bag in your arms filled with different fruits, vegetables, and meat. Although you've made a few additions to your list and you were unsure at first, but as Maki empties it, her eyes light up at the sight of the bright little bag.

“You got chips?”

“Well, yeah. They’re for you. I know you liked them.”

She beams at you and it’s almost blinding. There’s an odd flutter in your stomach and you ignore it, but it only becomes stronger when she rips open the bag and munches on the whole thing in seconds. The small satisfied moan from the first bite has you internally celebrating. She looks at peace. All she’s doing is eating a bag of her favorite chips, yet it fills you with some unexplainable feeling of warmth. You make another mental note to buy even more next time.

—

“What do you think of him?”

“Who?” She asks, sitting up on the couch as she watches you get lost on the canvas in front of you.

“My husband.”

“Oh,” she pauses, her hand coming from under her chin to think, “He’s pretty cool, I guess. He also pays me which is pretty cool, you know.”

“Come on, I won’t tell him,” you insist, coming close, your hands involuntarily brushing over hers. She doesn’t pull them away, letting you rest them, enjoying the extra warmth.

“I mean, he’s a man, alright.”

“What does that even mean?”

“No offense,” she continues, finding the least rudest way to say it, “He’s kind of basic, you know? Which isn’t bad but he yells at the TV when watching football, has you light his cigarettes, and waits for you to serve him food. Just your typical husband things, I guess.”

“Are you saying my husband is boring?” You ask with a stoic face, watching the fear fill her eyes.

“No, no! That’s not what I—”

“Kidding,” you chuckle as she purses her lips before joining along, “I was just curious.”

“Well, why?”

“I don’t know,” you say, sighing as you think of all the times he did anything romantic for you, “He’s a good man, you know that, right?”

“Well, of course.”

“He brings me flowers, gives me goodnight kisses, tells me he loves me, but—” you pause, afraid to finish the thought. Your heart pounds at the mess of ideas on your mind and you’re ashamed, “I don’t know if I feel that love thing those people always talk about.”

“What do you mean?”

She’s intrigued to say the least. You’re fiddling your thumbs with a nervous smile on your face. All the while, the music you put on fades in the background until it’s only the two of you, hearts beating fast, blood rushing to your cheeks. When you finally look her in the eye, she doesn’t miss how glassy they look and that’s when her suspicions are confirmed without a verbal sentence — you’re unsure.

“He- Well, I don’t know. Forget I said anything about it,” you clasp your hands together before getting back to work in the kitchen, “And please, don’t tell him.”

Uncertainty, you’re most definitely full of it, but Maki is almost sure she’s figured it out before you have and she likes to think that she’s gotten to know you. She’s picked up how you play with your fingers when you’re unsure, how you smooth down your dress when you try to keep your composure, how that your smile loses genuinity while you’re at the dinner table. She decides it’s not her business, she’s only the housemaid and you’re just the housewife she works under.

But she’ll always be there for you with open arms if you need it.

—

“We gotta make breakfast, Maki.” You poke her side, waking her up from a deep sleep.

You’re already ready for the day, the top half of your hair already tied in a bun and a lilac colored dress adorning your figure. She’s caught off guard when she opens her eyes and you’re sitting up on the side of the bed poking at her hip. Her vision is blurry without her glasses, but she can clearly smell the sweet scent of vanilla perfume. Taking in a deep breath, she sits up, too, reaching for her glasses on the bedside table.

And her sleek, black hair cascades down her shoulders, though it’s slightly messy, you’re tempted to run your fingers through the soft looking strands. You’ve seen Maki in her maid uniform at home, jeans when she goes out to shop, but the sight of her in a satin night dress was different and your breath hitches when the blanket falls off the upper half of her body. It’s a loose fit and she looks absolutely ethereal, almost like an angel.

She turns her head to the side and you fake cough, trying to make up for staring a little too long. “I know your day doesn’t start yet, but I was hoping to get some help on breakfast today. Is that alright with you?”

“Of course, Miss. I’ll go get ready right now.

“Cool.”

You walk down to the kitchen, preparing a pie crust for your quiche and reading through the recipe you were given by a friend. By the time you blind bake the crust, Maki joins you in her usual attire. “Need anything, Miss?”

“While the quiche is baking, I just need you to make some cookie dough. Just the usual, my family is coming over later.”

“Of course.”

She gets to work right away, finding the ingredients immediately as you fill up your empty pie crust and dance around the kitchen. Right after the quiche is placed in the oven, your hips sway along with the music that plays in the radio. It’s all soft and slow, Maki smiling at your antics while you jokingly attempt to serenade her. She’s mixing in the chocolate chips into the dough and you walk forward, energetic and lost in the song.

You don’t think much of it when you grab her hip and your faces come closer together. One second, you were playfully dancing around your kitchen and the next, your breaths mingle, the gap between the two of you closing. It’s her who decides to lean forward, soft lips meeting together, your back suddenly meeting the edge of the counter. Her hands rest on the surface, each on either side of you, and her lips taste like cherries. Your hands come up to her cheeks as your mouths meld together until it’s hard to breathe.

You pull away first, remembering that your husband is still sleeping upstairs. “What are we doing?”

“Don’t know,” she replies, her hand starting to trail under the skirt of your dress, “It feels right, though.”

“Should we stop?” You mutter, just barely enough for her to hear.

“Do you want to?”

“No.”

It gives her the extra rush of courage to get under your dress and push your body until your back is flat on the counter. Luckily, there was nothing underneath except for a pair of plain black panties, a damp spot right in the middle. Her thumb presses on your clothed clit and by the way your body squirms she knows you’re sensitive which only adds to the sadistic fun of pulling down your underwear at an agonizingly slow pace. “Need you,” you breathe out, your legs being positioned on her shoulders, “I need you, please.”

“I got you, Baby. Don’t worry.” She replies with a smile, her breath hitting your wet cunt.

Your breath hitches as her tongue trails up from your hole up to your sensitive pearl and she moans at the sweet taste of your arousal. Her hands keep a firm grip on your thighs, holding them open as you bite your lip to contain your moans. He’s right upstairs, you think, but any thought of caution starts to leave you once her soft lips wrap around your clit, sucking on the bundle of nerves causing your knuckles to turn white as they grab onto the edge of the counter.

Your husband has never touched you like this. Ever.

The feeling of her mouth is foreign, but welcome. Before you know it, the grip on one of your thighs loosen and two fingers slip into your soaked cunt. She’s gentle at first, the pumps of her digits ever so delicately pressing against your g spot, but once you hike up the skirt of your dress and thread your fingers through her hair, she speeds up, hitting hard and fast. “M-Maki— Shit!”

You squeal when her tongue starts massaging your clit and your walls clench despite being empty, “Such a pretty girl,” she coos, watching in awe at how your slick coats her fingers, “Such a pretty pussy.”

Lewd praises and squelches fill the kitchen air as the coil in your stomach builds and snaps until your cunt is gushing all over her. Your back arches as you reach your high and she leaves a trail of kisses from your thigh to your sopping pussy. Bringing her fingers to your mouth, she gives you one command.

“Suck.”

You obey, wrapping your soft lips around her digits, swirling your tongue and she gives a graceful smile, brushing a thumb over your flushed cheeks. A sheen of sweat covers your forehead, but the sound of footsteps brings you out of your thoughts. Maki pockets your underwear, giving you a wink, before washing her hands and taking the nearly forgotten quiche out of the oven.

By the time you hear the footsteps of your husband, you’re decent, minimal signs of physical exertion just barely noticeable. She’s going through her usual routine of plating your food in front of the two of you, doing the dishes, laundry, everything. You want to say something, you really do, and you’re left with your own questions.

At night, you’re left pondering the strong women with silky black hair whilst in the arms of your husband.

—

Two days.

That’s how long it’s been since you’ve gotten the most mind blowing orgasm of your life. Your panties are still missing, though you don’t mind knowing who has them. And when you think about the things your mother has told you repeatedly about your perfectly structured life, it crumbles with each second. When you look at the face next to you, the indifference in your heart starts to become more and more prominent.

And even though you should feel guilty — well, you do — you also don’t regret it at all.

You still do your chores as expected, make the bed, cook dinner. You still organize the laundry, do the dishes, and tend to your rose garden. You still disinfect, fold, and have sex with your husband who’s indifferent to your pleasure every night. Almost every domestic activity was accompanied by Maki, who often sought to take over or help.

Yet, she wouldn’t even look at you.

She wouldn’t say anything that didn’t pertain to a grocery list or a command and it was infuriating. Still, you were determined to bring it up — how could you not? As you fold blankets on the couch and think, you call out her name. “Maki?”

“Yes, Miss?”

“Are we going to talk about what happened?”

“What do you mean?”

Your heart drops a tiny bit, it was an expected response based on the fact it felt like she was avoiding you, but you still had to swallow the lump in your throat. “Nevermind. I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing?” She asks as you’re looking down on the rug, trying to focus on the pattern instead of the woman in front of you.

“I’m just sorry I brought it up. I’m sorry that I made you uncomfortable. I’m sorry that we did whatever that was,” you take a deep breath as forming tears blurred your vision, “I’m sorry that I can’t fucking do this, Maki. I don’t love him. I can’t love him.”

She sighs, scooching forward and closer to you then pulling the half folded blanket from your hands. “You shouldn’t be sorry. This was my fault.”

“You don’t understand.”

“Try me.”

“You’re just, I’m just—” you inhale again, trying to find the right words to say, “You’re different. You’re different from him in all the best ways. You listen to what I have to say, you care about how I feel.”

“That’s something that any good friend would do—”

“I don’t want to be your friend.”

“Oh.”

She brings her fingers to your chin, nudging your head up until you’re looking her in the eyes for the first time in days. She gazes at you, appreciating every curve and every mark on your skin. You take this as an opportunity to lean in, planting a soft kiss on her lips. She doesn’t stop it, instead indulging in the act, cupping your cheeks.

It soon becomes hungry, her tongue slipping past your lips, you being rolled over onto your back as she slips her hand under your floral dress. She presses a finger against your clothed cunt, causing you to gasp and throw your head back. At the same time she leaves sloppy kisses on the exposed skin of your neck and you struggle to form a coherent sentence.

“M-Maki, stop,” you whimper and she pauses, “Wanna make you feel good.”

“Oh?” She smirks, giving you another breathless kiss, “Wanna put that mouth to use, Baby?”

“Yeah,” you breath out, “Wanna make you feel good, Mommy.”

Her expression is filled with pride as she drags her fingers across your face and into your mouth. You comply with the silent command, wrapping your lips around the digits and sucking softly, swirling your tongue around them. “Good girl.”

You let out a hum while she discards her panties somewhere on the ground and her bare cunt hovers over your face. It’s intimidating, yet the sight of her glistening folds makes you wet. All you wanted to do was taste her, drink up all of her juices, and when you finally do you can’t get enough. Despite the lack of experience, you do what you think would feel good, giving experimental licks, noting when her body twitched and when she would let out a saccharine moan.

“Fuck — you’re doing so well,” she coos, carding her fingers through your hair, admiring the sight of your half lidded eyes and the feel of your tongue, “You sure this is your first time eating pussy?”

You hum in response which sends vibrations throughout her body, causing her to throw her head back. You grip onto her lower back, desperately bringing her wet cunny closer to yourself and she rolls her hips, grinding herself on your mouth. You’re already addicted, lapping at all of the cum she has to offer, watching intently as her mouth forms an o shape and she soaks the lower half of your face.

“Such a good fucking girl, aren’t you?”

She gets off your face and you smile with pride, tugging off the rest of her maid uniform until she’s completely bare in your living room. Every curve of her body fills you with even more lust and you’re sure your panties are soaked just from the sight. Her thighs are defined, muscular even, and you kiss them before going back to her ruined pussy, lapping at all the slick.

“You’re so pretty, Maki,” you utter, your breath hitting her neck as you come back up to her face.

She pushes you backward until you’re flat on your back, pinning your wrists together before ripping off your panties. Maki wastes no time, two fingers entering your hole and curling with every thrust. “You got this wet from eating me out?” She questions cockily, leaving an open mouthed kiss on the shell of your ear along with a nibble, “You’re a cute little thing, aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” you whimper in between breaths, “Feels s’good.”

“Yeah?” She responds, watching you come undone underneath her.

Your orgasm builds up with every pump, the coil in your stomach tightening. She fastens the pace, every movement being calculated, her fingers knuckles deep in your cunt. Her fingertips manage to brutally hit the spongy spot inside of you, causing your legs to shake. Your back arches when her lips wrap around your clit, the simultaneous stimulation making your body tremble in delight. You’re gushing all over her fingers and she stares in awe as your slick drips down your thighs.

“Can we go to the bedroom?” You request meekly, barely recovering from your last orgasm.

“Of course, Baby,” she beams at you, body gleaming with a sheen of sweat, your heart fluttering in your chest.

Maki picks you up bridal style with almost no effort, pressing kisses all over your face on the way upstairs. When you finally get to the bedroom, she lays you down gently, almost as if you were a delicate piece of glass. But the moment of soft intimacy doesn’t last.

It doesn’t last when her pussy hovers over your face with her head buried in between your legs, licking hot stripes on your folds, sucking on your pearl while her fingers brush on your legs before finding their way back to your ruined cunt. Your tongue presses on her slit and her hips lower until your mouth is full of pussy. Her sweet taste is addicting and concurrent moans only heighten the pleasure, vibrations shooting through both of your bodies. Her thumb circles your clit furiously as she pulls away from your cunt to speak.

“You like this, don’t you? Ain’t this the same bed where you get fucked by your husband?” She questions demandingly, slapping your cunny.

You whine into her cunt, the sudden pain causing your walls to clamp around nothing. She laughs sadistically, pinching your clit, biting at your inner thighs.

“S’good, such a good little slut,” she coos, her nose tickling your clit as her face inches closer, “Bet you like getting fucked by your maid, don’t you?”

You can only respond with a squeal, her hand laying another blow to your aching pussy. “Don’t worry, pretty girl. I got you.” She reassures you, mouth ravaging your cunt, slurping every drop of cum you had to offer. She’s close to her own orgasm, you can tell by the way she rides your face, soaking the lower half until the sweet droplets slide down your neck. You massage her clit with your tongue as she comes down from her high, but after yours, she doesn’t stop.

Instead, she continues to feast on your cunt like a starved woman, the pressure in your stomach building for the nth time that day. Coming again almost hurts, but she ignores the high pitched wails spilling from your lips, the sounds only encouraging her to keep sucking until your body trembles. At this point, you’re light headed, vision gradually becoming blurry. Your walls are pulsating, your mind is unable to process everything at once.

Especially the shocked man who stands in the doorway of your bedroom.

And at that exact moment, you let out a sob as Maki sadistically looks your husband right in the eye, her mouth still devouring your overstimulated cunny with fervor. Your hole leaks milky white, staining your shared sheets and you cry out her name, hopelessly gripping onto the plush of her ass for stability, digging your nails into the flesh. When she pulls away, a string of spit connects from her mouth to your pearl and her pupils are blown, cheeks covered with your arousal, all the while maintaining eye contact with him.

As if there was no one in the room, she readjusts her until her face hovers over yours, her swollen pussy present on your thigh.

“Open.”

You comply readily and she grabs your face with one hand, squishing your wet cheeks so hard that they start to ache.

“Good girl.”

She spews into your mouth, watching the blob as it glides down your tongue and you swallow obediently before she comes down for a sweet kiss. The taste of yourself makes your head dizzy with lust. Let it be known that the horrified figure standing in the doorway could never make you feel as good as the maid.  

Oops.

© this is a work of @crybabygumi, all rights reserved. do not plagiarize, copy, or repost my work on other platforms.

[keanureevesisbae]

But professor… - c.8

Summary: Walter and Penny adapt to Maryland

Professor!Walter Marshall x Penny Townsend (Asian ofc)

Wordcount: 2.1k

Warnings: None

Masterlist // But professor… masterlist // Previous chapter //

Tomorrow Walter and I are going to move to Maryland and there is just one more thing I need to do: buy some snacks. My cravings have been all over the place recently, so a trip without snack is asking for trouble. Walter is packing the final things with my mom and dad and in a minute they are going to put everything in the truck and U-haul. Since I’m the only one that knows what I really want, I decided to go on a little grocery store trip.

I’m wearing an oversized sweater on top of my leggings and it’s almost the only piece of clothing that is able to hide the bump. I’m seventeen weeks pregnant now, meaning the bump is harder and harder to hide, however this sweater will do. The chances of me running into someone I actually know is next to zero, but better be safe than sorry.

I walk into the grocery store and grab a basket, slowly filling it with what I want. ‘There she is,’ I hear a voice say, one I haven’t heard in so long and certainly haven’t missed.

Fitzgerald.

Every hair in my neck stands up straight. I simply pull my lips into an awkward smile, before walking off to the register. As I’m scanning the products, he actually follows me and I hate how this guy never understands the message, spoken or unspoken.

‘So, you haven’t been coming to classes,’ he says.

‘I know,’ I say, ‘I quit. Been looking into some other things.’

That is already more than I actually wanted to share with him, but hopefully it’s enough to make him go away.

‘Oh really? What you been looking into?’

Just fuck off, Fitzgerald. ‘First of all moving back home,’ I say, packing everything in my bag. ‘New York never really was the place for me.’ After paying for my snacks, I walk out of the store, only to hear the footsteps of the guy who just won’t leave me alone following behind me.

‘Did you hear that professor Marshall is quitting?’

Yes, I actually helped him writing his resignation letter. ‘Oh,’ I say, ‘I didn’t.’

‘Apparently he got a job offer somewhere else.’

Yep, in Maryland. ‘Good for him,’ I say. ‘Well, I gotta go. Bye, Fitzgerald.’

He wants to say something, but then his eyes widen. ‘Yeah, bye,’ he says. He quickly turns around and is gone by the time I looked over my shoulder at him.

What was that about?

When I look up, I glare at Walter, who is standing on the other side of the road, leaning against a street light, his arms crossed. I walk up to him and without saying a word at first, we get mixed into the crowd. ‘What was that about?’ I ask him.

‘Nothing,’ he says, a little too nonchalant for my liking, ‘just wanted to make sure that you weren’t carrying anything too heavy.’ He pulls the bags from my hands and adds: ‘I hate that snotty kid.’

‘I had everything under control,’ I say, poking his side. ‘Did you see him scooting away?’

‘I wish I had it on video,’ Walter chuckles.

My parents are already in the U-haul they rented to make moving as quickly and easy as possible for us and I hand them some snacks.

‘Oh, honey, I’m so glad you’re moving back,’ mom says, after our final pee. Walter just handed over the key to the realtor of his loft and stands behind me, before he says: ‘I know I am happy to move to Maryland. I quite love the place already.’ He presses a kiss on my temple.

My parents get in the U-haul and I wave to them as they drive off. Walter helps me in the truck and when he sits next to me, he gives me a kiss. ‘I love you,’ he tells me.

‘I love you too, Walter.’ I take off my sweater, before strapping myself in the seatbelt. ‘It’s ridiculously hot in here,’ I say, leaning back against the seat.

‘Twenty bucks you are gonna be cold within half an hour.’

I glare at him. ‘That’s mean.’

‘Ah, princess, don’t pout. You know how that makes me weak.’ I continue to tut my bottom lip out and he chuckles. ‘Let’s just hope the baby doesn’t get your pout, because otherwise I can never say no.’

‘No matter what the baby looks like,’ I say, ‘you’re gonna be unable to say no anyway. You are such a push over with me, this baby will wrap you around their finger in no time.’

‘Ai, exposed.’ He holds my hand in his as he drives off and gives me a kiss on my knuckles.

‘You thought about the co sleeping thing I mentioned to you?’ I ask him.

He sighs. ‘Yes and I’m not sure about it. I mean, we could place a crib in our room, right?’

‘But that’s so sad for the baby. To be alone like that after living inside my stomach for so long. What if they don’t be to be alone? They are not gonna sleep in our bed forever, Walter.’

‘I know,’ he says, ‘but… what if I crush them? I mean, they would be in between us, so… That means no sleep for me.’

I start to laugh. ‘That was your worry? Oh, Walter.’ Since I’m already close to him, I wrap my arms around his neck to give him a kiss on his cheek. ‘Aren’t you absolutely darling?’

I actually spot a faint blush on his cheeks.

I decide not to push it any further, because I feel like this co sleep thing is something that needs to simmer for awhile. ‘Can I ask a question?’ I ask.

He nods. ‘Of course.’

‘What if something goes wrong,’ I start, but he is having none of it.

‘No, no, no, nothing is gonna go wrong.’

‘But what if?’ I say. ‘I mean, something could go wrong during birth.’

He clenches his jaw, not wanting to talk about it obviously. ‘I see,’ he mumbles.

‘What I wanted to say was that if I am unable to answer, that you should decide what happens, okay? I’m one hundred percent sure you are going to choose the right thing for us.’

He smiles. ‘That’s what you wanted to tell me?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Oh, princess, princess, don’t scare me like that, okay?’

I smile. ‘Sorry.’

✎ ✎ ✎

Walter and I bought a house and never in a million years did I expect to have this type of domestic life at only twenty one, however it’s exactly the life I have now and I wouldn’t change it for the world. The move from New York and Maryland went pretty swiftly, especially because my parents helped a lot, since it’s only twenty minutes from my parents’ place.

The place we chose was already pretty great, but Walter and I decided—okay, I decided—that some wallpaper should cheer it up. It was a lot of white and it made me feel like I was at a dentist. There’s lots of pastel going on now, mint green, baby blue, soft pink and some yellow.

However, Walter did all the work, because he doesn’t want me to do anything. Too much work can’t be good for the baby, princess.

He now works at the Maryland Police Department and he is actually enjoying it a lot. He now is on patrol duties, but it will only take a few months before he is back as a detective again.

Weeks have gone by and today marks me being twenty seven weeks pregnant. I won’t lie about it, but I’m very over this pregnancy already. Everything hurts. My head hurts, my stomach hurts, my boobs hurts and don’t get me started on my back. I’m mostly sitting on the couch, reading both informative books and novels if I’m not mindlessly watching Netflix shows.

I am a horrendous cook, but I continue to try some things for Walter, because I hate it that he has to both work and cook himself some dinner when he’s off.

Walter comes back from work and smiles when he sees me. ‘There is my beautiful woman,’ he says. ‘Princess, princess, aren’t you gorgeous.’

‘Stop,’ I chuckle, trying to get up from the couch, but fail miserably. ‘I’m sorry, but dinner got burned.’

He smiles. ‘That’s okay, princess. I’ll order some take out, don’t you worry.’

‘I’m really useless,’ I admit. ‘I’m so sorry.’

He scoffs. ‘Don’t say stuff like that. You’re never useless.’ He wraps an arm around my shoulders and pulls me against his side. ‘Tell me what did you do today?’

‘I went to that meeting,’ I say, ‘talked about being a first time mom. It’s just that…’ I place my head against his shoulder. ‘I’m scared.’

‘Why is that, princess?’

‘What if I’m a terrible mom?’

‘You’re not gonna be a terrible mom,’ he retorts. ‘The audacity to think you’re gonna be a terrible mom, when I know that you are nothing but sweet, kind, lovely and you will be a wonderful mom.’

‘Really?’ I ask.

‘Really, darling.’ He places his hand on my stomach and says: ‘It’s okay to be scared, however, you have nothing to worry about. Not when I am right here for the two of you.’

✎ ✎ ✎

The next day, while my mom and I are folding some baby clothes, we watch dad and Walter finish the crib. Mom has been sharing embarrassing baby stories about me and to make things even worse, my dad adds a few stories to it, some I didn’t even know.

Thankfully Walter really enjoys them, because he chuckles loudly. It took him awhile, but he is really liking it, having my parents around.

‘You really don’t want to know the gender?’ mom asks me.

‘No,’ I say, ‘I like to be surprised.’

‘Walter,’ my mom sighs, ‘can’t you talk some sense into her?’

‘Sorry, CC,’ he says, ‘but I kinda like the surprise too.’

She scoffs, before she lets out a chuckle. The baby already made the bond between my parents and I a lot tighter and for that I’m forever grateful.

I resit a little and Walter wouldn’t be Walter if he didn’t notice immediately I was slightly uncomfortable. ‘Princess, are you okay?’

‘Yeah, just my back hurts.’

‘How about you go to bed?’ Walter suggests. ‘Rest a little? You’ve been up pretty early on.’ When I don’t stand up immediately, he walks over to me and crouches down in front of me. ‘What’s wrong, princess?’

‘Nothing, just tired and in pain, that’s all.’

He nods, pulls me up and holds my hand tightly in his. I want to apologize to my parents, but my mom simply tells me not to worry. ‘Pregnancy can be rough, darling,’ she says, ‘so please don’t worry.’

I wonder if it’s hard for my mom to see me pregnant, when she couldn’t get pregnant herself. She never said it to me, but still I wonder from time to time. Even if she does have some hard feelings against it, she never shows it, as she is super supportive of the pregnancy. I give her a kiss, just like I give my dad a kiss and mom says: ‘Walter, did you even sleep last night?’

‘No, this one woke me up,’ he says with a smile.

‘You should sleep as well. You had a late shift the day before yesterday and you two should get a lot of sleep when you can. When the baby is here, she’ll keep you up.’

‘We really don’t know the gender, mom,’ I say with a chuckle. ‘I don’t know if they are gonna be a he or a she.’

‘Worth a shot, you gotta give me that. Okay, you go rest, we finish up in here and let ourselves out. We love you.’

‘Love you too,’ I say back, before Walter and I walk towards the bedroom. He helps me out of my sweatpants and into the bed. I hug the pregnancy pillow, and the bed dips down a bit when Walter gets underneath the thin blanket behind me. He places his hand on my stomach, before kissing my temple. ‘You comfortable, sweetheart?’

‘I am,’ I whisper. ‘I’m sorry I’m keeping you up.’

‘No, don’t do that.’

It only causes me to sniffle, but Walter knows exactly what to do when I have these slight emotional outbursts. He pulls my back closer against his chest, despite him being very warm, he tugs the blankets over our bodies and warms me up even more, giving me more kisses on the side of my face. ‘It can get pretty rough, princess,’ he says, ‘and that’s okay. Just let it all out, okay?’

‘Why are you so sweet?’ I hiccup.

He chuckles. ‘Well, you’re gonna be the mom of our kid and you’re my girlfriend. Of course I’m gonna be sweet to you. Forever and ever, princess. Forever and ever.’

[yourmidnightlover]

pain reliever

TW: descriptive talk abt period cramps ig?, talk abt cysts, mutual pining lol

Summary: in which spencer and Y/N love each other but refuse to tell each other. Y/N's having major period pain, the effect of a cyst, and spencer comes over to comfort her.

WC: 3,744

A/N - this one’s a bit of a rollercoaster. it has three different POV’s so just bear with me please!

masterlist

--------------------

don't get me wrong, working at the BAU is amazing and definitely has it's perks, but it also has several downsides too. one of those pesky little downsides includes the amount of time off we have.

meaning we don't have much downtime.

this was one of the rare occasions when we were able to have two weeks off, the result of a very strenuous case.

this time was so exciting, spencer and i planned to go out to a movie he'd been dying to see. nobody else wanted to go with him and were being absolute jerks about it, so i automatically stepped up to go with him.

i went to bed the night before we were supposed to go out after showering. i was actually excited to be able to spend some time with him.

i couldn't help but begin to have feelings for him soon after i joined the team. i mean, who would be able to resist those amazing curls, the sweet smile, kind spirit, not to even mention how smart he is.

he didn't know that, of course. and i planned for him to never know. i was able to keep it a secret for 5 and a half years, and i didn't plan on stopping that streak anytime soon. i didn't want to ruin the friendship i had with him by confessing my undying love for him only to confirm my fears of it being unrequited.

i woke up groaning, the effect of an intense pain on my neck, back, and uterus. I almost immediately knew what that meant, sadly.  

i ran to the bathroom, only to find my suspicions confirmed. my period has always been irregular but about a year ago, i started getting terrible cramps when it wasn't anywhere close to the time for my period.

i went to the doctor to find out a cyst had grown on my left ovary so i started taking birth control per my doctor's request. the only thing about the birth control i was on was that it made me sick when i was on the green pill, so i had to stop taking it.

not taking it meant my period was always a surprise. but hey... at least i wasn't pregnant i guess.

when i took the birth control, it also lessened the cramps. not taking it also brought them back. sometimes not even the extra strength mydol was able to subside the terrible cramps that would ripple throughout my body.

those cramps meant that i needed to cancel my plans with spencer. i could only hope he wouldn't take it as me not wanting to spend time with him.

although, i certainly didn't want him to see me like this.

i decided i would take a shower in attempt to wash the dirty feeling off of my body. I could just call him after i got out and tell him i have a bug or something.

i took my time washing myself, letting the hot water soothe my aching muscles. cysts normally only affect the uterus area and cause discomfort at most times, but it always becomes severely worse during that time of the month.

luckily, my doctors helped create an appointment for a procedure to remove the cyst. the only catch being that the appointment is still 6 months away.

i finished showering and wrapped a towel around my body before popping two mydol's in my mouth and swallowing. i grabbed my cell and quickly dialed spencer's name.

"Y/N! hi. what's up?" he asked sweetly. i could hear the excitement in his voice.

"hey, spence," i started, already feeling terrible for the sad news. "i won't be able to go out today. i really, really wish i could. i came down with something and don't think i'm well enough to go out. i'm so sorry," i murmured, already regretted having to cancel.

"oh... that's okay. are you alright? do you need me to take you to the doctor?" he asked all worried. i giggled softly.

"no, that's alright, spence. thank you though. i think i'm probably just gonna get some house work done in the meantime," i declared with a sigh.

"you're planning on cleaning when you're sick? another reason to never doubt the strength of a woman, i suppose," he quipped, another laugh erupting from my chest, this one being louder.

"that, spencer reid, is why you're my best friend," i said with a smile.

"that and the fact that you actually listen to my incessant babbling and rambles," he remarked.

"i actually happen to enjoy those rambles, doctor. don't sell yourself short," I demanded in a sweet tone.

"thank you, Y/N. you should get some rest. don't overexert yourself," he said sweetly. "in all the years i've known you you've only been sick a number of times, so i would imagine you really don't feel too well," he declared. "goodbye."

"goodbye, spencer. s-sorry again," I stammered out.

I hung up the phone before actually getting dressed in some proper underwear. I threw on some loose shorts and skipped putting a bra on, my boobs were really sore, opting for just throwing a tank top on.

i started with doing the dishes from last night. the medicine was kind of kicking in, not fully taking the stabbing pain away but lessening it enough to where it would be manageable.

once the dishes were done i started doing the laundry, taking breaks in-between loads. during the breaks i made sure to drink a lot of water to stay hydrated.

part of me was debating going to the store to pick up some dark chocolate, ice cream, kale chips, and some chinese, but i decided against it.

i'm sure if i went out i would immediately regret it and have the pain 10x worse, just because that's my luck. so, suffering alone it was.

once i finished all of the laundry, i sat down on the couch. i had been going for about three hours, and definitely felt the toll it was taking on my body.

i turned on FRIENDS and grabbed a heating pad from a bin in my living room. i placed the pad on my upper back and groaned at the heat.

before i knew it, i was dead asleep.

SPENCER'S POV

i didn't buy it.

she never gets sick, and when she does it's like she's dying. she doesn't laugh when she's sick, and her voice wasn't as nasally.

don't get me wrong, something was obviously wrong with her, but she wasn't sick sick. maybe another sick.

what else would cause her to cancel plans with me? she's never done that before.

although, there was one time where she mentioned her needing to go to the doctor for a consult about a cyst. maybe it was the cyst?

wait... her uterus. the cyst was on her uterus.

we were on a case a couple months back, and this unsub was hard to track down. when we managed to figure out where he was, she ended up having to chase him down. she had to run a mile for at least 7 minutes before actually getting him. he was only 25 and was an exercise fanatic.

after catching the guy and bringing him in she had a hard time hiding her discomfort. even at the station, abut an hour later, she was still grabbing her lower stomach in pain. when i asked her what was wrong she told me about the cyst and where it was.

although, the cyst never really affected her energy level since then. she was able to go out on cases and perform perfectly fine.

the only thing that it could've been would be her- ohhh!!

oh...

i should get her something. food. she loves food.

she's probably in a lot of pain right now because of that. she shouldn't have to handle that pain 24/7. she was so sweet, and caring, and generous, and loving, and undeserving of any sort of discomfort.

to be honest, i've had the largest crush on her since after she joined the BAU. who wouldn't?

she's such an amazing person. just being around her lightens my mood. not to mention her beauty. don't get me wrong, i absolutely love her mind and everything about her personality, but the beauty she beholds is beyond anything i've ever encountered. then again, maybe the feelings i have for her boost that beauty in my eyes.

it was that beauty that kept me quiet. why would someone with beauty as ethereal as hers even look at a guy like me? it's like she's not meant for this world. she's too good for this world.

i'm in too deep now to share my feelings. i would do anything to keep her light in my life, even if that meant keeping all my love for her bottled up.

my heart ached at the thought of her in pain that i can't help her subside. the least i could do is be there for her.

i quickly grabbed my keys- yes, that's right. i'm driving for her. what kind of man am i?- and headed out of my apartment.

i went to the grocery store and picked up some of her favorites, dark chocolate, mint chip ice cream, kale chips, and... chinese. she loves chinese, so surely that's what she's craving. if she doesn't want it i would gladly get her whatever it is she does want.

i would give her the entire world if i could.

after picking the items up, i made my way to her place and pulled her key out of my pocket after she didn't answer my knock the first couple times. We had both decided to give each other a copy of our keys for safety purposes, result of me becoming the designated driver after a girl's night out gone wrong.

long story short, all the girls left with someone, leaving Y/N stranded at a heavily populated bar. if the girls weren't drunk when they left then i know i would've scolded them for leaving her in such danger. hell, they were FBI agents and left a friend who wasn't in her right mind alone in the middle of the night.

the only reason i was able to pick her up was because she drunkingly called me, slurring her words together. that's a story for another time.

i held the bags in one hand and the chinese food under my arm while i unlocked the door and quitely walked in. i saw her laying down on the couch, looking so peaceful.

SECOND PERSON

spencer looked at you as you slept. he noticed the heating pad laying on your back as your face was partially smushed from the couch. he'd never seen anything so adorable.

he pushed a strand of hair out of your face as he gently tapped your shoulders to wake you. you squinted at him in confusion for a second before you finally spoke.

"spencer? wh-what're you doing here?" you questioned him in disbelief.

you had no idea why he was here. you had told him you couldn't go out, right?

"me being the amazing profiler i am figured out what was actually wrong," he gloated. "i brought your favorite snacks and came with chinese food. if you want something else i could always go back out and-"

"did you drive?" you squeaked.

"why wouldn't i? you're in pain right now, that's the least i could do to somehow help you," he gushed.

you felt tears pricking your eyes at his confession. how could someone be so selfless and kind as to put themselves though something they hate doing for you?

"hey-hey, what is it?" he worriedly questioned.

"i-it's just... th-that's so sweet, and nice, and you hate driving, and you're such an amazing person, and i don't deserve you," you sniffled out, the tears flowing past my eyes as you sat up on the couch to give him a place to sit.

He grabbed the heating pad that fell off your back and set it on the coffee table before wiping your tears. His arms wrapped around your shoulders as you lightly cried into his shirt for a few minutes before pulling back.

"sorry about your shirt," you whined.

"don't worry about it. and i truly think it's me who doesn't deserve you, Y/N," he said softly. "now, let's dig into the food. i'm actually hungry right now, i had to smell it the entire way here and it's been taunting me ever since," he said seriously, eliciting another laugh out of you. "oh! there she is! i love hearing your laugh," he smiled.

"oh, you're just saying that," you waved him off as he feigned offense with a loud gasp.

"are you accusing me of lying, Y/N? i'm terribly offended," he shot his hand over his heart in an attempt to mock pain as he groaned.

"i would never, spencie," you taunted with a smirk before getting an actual cramp.

your face contorted slightly in pain as you bent over in an attempt to ease the discomfort. it felt like someone was stabbing your entire lower stomach and punching you all at once. the pain and sudden movement made your head begin to throb intensely, so you didn't know where to put your hands. your stomach or head? you chose stomach.

spencer felt horrible as he watched you go through such pain.

"what hurts, Y/N/N? let me help you," spencer pleaded.

"head. really bad," you groaned.

he got behind you as his hands found your temples and began massaging them gently, being able to subside the pain pulsing in your head. while your stomach still hurt, the pain became bearable again, allowing you to sit up and face spencer. he saw that your eyes were full of tears once again and his arms flew around you.

he hated that you had to go through that... every month too? your pain tolerance has always been high, something spencer learned after you got shot in the thigh and didn't even shed a tear, so he knew the fact that tears were in your eyes had meant the pain had to be terrible.

"food?" he said softly, you nodded eagerly, still being wary of the headache.

he went into your kitchen and put away the ice cream, chocolate, and kale chips before getting the chinese. he grabbed you a water bottle from your fridge before exiting the kitchen and sitting beside you on the couch.

"why didn't you tell me they were this bad?" spencer wondered.

"i didn't want you to worry, or see me like this," you shrugged.

it was true, you hated anyone seeing you hurt or weak. you prided yourself on being tough and strong enough to withstand most things. the fact that a measly monthly period was breaking you hurt your ego more than you'd like to admit.

for spencer, he didn't care. the only thing he wanted to do was make sure you were okay and be there for you when you weren't. he was determined to help you through this time. it made him feel... important. he enjoyed caring for others as it gave him a sense of purpose.

"Y/N, i don't care what state you're in. i always enjoy seeing you. and i'm always here to help you. asking for help makes you stronger than you'd think," he soothed you.

one thing you loved about him was that he always had a way with words. he was able to make you feel safe in the most dangerous situations, calm in the most chaotic, comfortable in the most destitute, and all with words.

you ate your food rather quickly after realizing you hadn't eaten all day. you were unashamed of eating that much, too. you'd become so comfortable with him over the years that you didn't feel embarrassed over something as routine as eating as you normally would with others.

after spencer finished eating he insisted on cleaning up rather than you do it yourself.

and to think, you thought you couldn't fall deeper in love with the man and here you were, falling deeper the longer he stayed.

little did you know that spencer was already madly in love with you.

he came back and sat beside you gently, looking at you with the utmost adoration that you couldn't see since you were back to being doubled over in pain.

"let's get you laid down, hmm?" spencer suggested as he gently rubbed your back.

"mhmm," you agreed, sitting up far too quickly. your back shot out in pain as you tried to straighten out, bringing a groan to your lips and causing you to twist your torso in an attempt to avoid any more hurt. "i guess i can just stay here," you said, resuming the doubled-over position.

spencer wanted to cry himself seeing you so defeated. you were the most strong-willed person he knew and here you were, giving up on something. he wouldn't let that happen.

"you'll be more comfortable in the bed. i'll carry you since you can't get up, okay?" spencer suggested.

you hummed in defeat as he swiftly scooped you up, leaving your body folded up as you swung your arms around his neck. he laid you down on the bed gently as you groaned at your back stretching out.

"turn over on your stomach," spencer ordered.

"wh-what? why?" you wondered.

"you'll see when you do it, ms. stubborn-pants," he teased.

you groaned and flopped onto your stomach, reaching to cuddle the pillow your head was resting on. spencer secretly wished he was that pillow.

his hands fell onto your back, applying light pressure right between your shoulder blades.

"ohh, this is what you were gonna do," you hummed in content as his hands continued to work their magic. he gathered your hair and pulled it to the side as he worked his way up to your neck. "ugh that feels amazing, spence," you groaned.

spencer huffed a laugh at your enthusiasm, him being happy that he can subside some of your pain. if doing something as simple as giving you a massage made you happy, he was happy.

spencer worked his hands back down to your shoulders and worked out nearly every single knot on your back. you felt your breathing slow from the relaxation and didn't even realize how good of a distraction your hands on her body were. if only you could massage my boobs, you thought with a laugh.

"umm... what?" spencer questioned.

"hmm?" you questioned, suddenly realizing that you had said that out loud. "i didn't say anything," you said, your voice raising an octave as you spoke.

spencer knew what he had heard, but decided to drop it to make you more comfortable.

"right, sorry," he said with a smile. maybe you did have feelings for him.

he continued the massage and noticed you were asleep after about ten more minutes. He sighed as he watched your hair move with each breath you took. he relished in the fact that he helped you achieve something, that he was useful for something.

"god, i love you so much," he whispered. "i love you so much, i don't even think i could tell you how much i truly love you."

you were awake. you heard him. you heard every word. you were in that weird between stage when you weren't really asleep, but you weren't necessarily awake either.

"i love you too, spencer," you spoke.

spencer shot up at your words, realization hitting him as you stirred in what he assumed was your sleep. you rolled over onto your back and looked into his eyes.

"i love you so, so much, spence," you smiled, noticing the shocked look on his face.

"y-you do?" he babbled.

"of course i do. how could i not?" you quipped, noticing his utter nervousness.

"i-i can't believe it. you love me?"

"how many times do i have to say it? i love you, spencer reid. i love you," you said as the shocked expression on his face turned into one of pure happiness and joy.

"i love you, Y/N Y/L/N. i've loved you for so long..." he trailed off, bringing your body into his arms.

"and fyi, i mean the romantic way if you didn't catch that," you joked.

"good because that's exactly how i meant it," he said, pulling back to look at you once again. "ca-can i kiss you?" he asked as his hands were balanced on the back of your neck.

you nodded eagerly before his lips crashed into yours passionately as you placed your hands on his face. the feeling of his sharp jawline with his scruffy facial hair something you've been wanting to feel against your skin for far too long.

spencer tugged gently at your hair, bringing a soft moan to your lips, allowing his tongue to enter your mouth gingerly. he was immediately granted dominance as you allowed his tongue to travel into your mouth, investigating it thoroughly.

you were both in a state of euphoria as you delved into each other's presence in a new manner. both of you knew this discovery would change your relationship, but you had both gone through every scenario in your minds in the many years' past.

you finally pulled back at another sharp pain in your uterus.

"ouchhh," you grimaced.

"are you okay? what can i do?" he wondered eagerly.

"just cuddle with me?" you asked with pleading eyes.

"of course i can," he smiled.

he moved up to the headboard and laid his head on one of your pillows after getting underneath the covers. after he opened his arms, you rested your head on his chest and threw one arm over his torso, interlacing your legs underneath the sheets. he brought one arm around your waist as the other drew you closer across your shoulders. You nestled your head into his neck and inhaled his comforting scent.

"you smell good," you giggled.

"thank you," he laughed at your compliment.

"spencer?" you asked.

"yea, Y/N?"

"you're my pain reliever."

[raysofcrosby]

37 and 45 for matty please!

37. “welcome to fatherhood” + 45. “you’re getting a vasectomy. that’s final.” w/ matty tkachuk

The one thing you and Matt both agreed on from the moment you got married and even before, was that you wanted to have at least, 4 kids. He grew up with a brother and sister while you grew up an only child, both of you wanted your future kids to experience life with a sibling by their side. 

And Matt especially had been eager to start a family from the moment the words “I do” left both of your mouths. He spent most of your reception whispering into your ear all of the things he had planned for the nigh, how he couldn’t wait to get you alone and just how excited he was for your honeymoon in Turks and Caicos— “I hope you don’t plan on leaving the room for the first two days...you know, adjust to the time difference and all.”

It was only an hour time difference between Turks and Caicos and your permanent summer residence in St. Louis, but Matt didn’t care— it didn’t matter, and the two of you definitely didn’t leave the room until your third day into your two-week honeymoon.

Which is why it was no surprise to anyone that you found out you were  pregnant a little over two months later when you were packing up to go to Calgary for the season. You were packing up some of the bathroom stuff when you came across a box of tests from your bachelorette party when it was decided the group of you would play “pregnancy test roulette” which thankfully— no one was actually pregnant.

But there was one left and instead of taking it with you or just leaving it behind, you decided to use it and see if maybe the back to back...to multiple back nights on your honeymoon and even then after, resulted in you being pregnant. Matt came into the bathroom, having stripped down to his gym shorts by the time he reached your bathroom only to see you holding the pee stick in hand.

“Is that?”

“I’m pregnant.”

He only stood there shocked for a few seconds before he swept you up into his arms and kissed you, the excitement shining in his blue eyes as he put you down and smiled. “We’re gonna have a baby.”

Your pregnancy was actually...pretty idyllic when it came to first pregnancies. Your appointments all went perfect, you were in good health throughout and even though at most times you were sure that your moodiness would chase Matt away at any given moment, he never faltered. He was with you every step of the way whenever the Flames schedule permitted it.

He took pictures of the ultrasounds to send to family, if he was on the road he’d always send you a text asking for a bump date, and then get a little cheeky asking straight up for a size check on your chest because he ‘wanted to see how the boobs are looking.’ He was loving, attentive and you felt more than lucky to be able to have him with you throughout.

You were sitting in the friends and family box at a Flames game when your water broke all over the nice fancy carpet floor of the suite. Both your Mom and Matt’s were helping you out of the suite, your last words to Keith before leaving for the hospital being “tell him my water broke, but do not let him leave this game!” A wish that Keith abided by and that Matt, when in an intermission, sent you texts worrying about missing the birth. You assured him that you doubted that you’d be having a baby in the 20 minutes of third period hockey.

The Flames won, Matt skipped media and came rushing to the hospital to be by your side, making it right as you were getting your epidural. Your families were in the room with you, waiting to pass the time and trying to distract you from your contractions. By the time you were fully dismayed, both you and Matt were escorted to the delivery room Brady yelling out via FaceTime that he hoped Matt didn’t pass out.

Out of all the books and websites you read and from the stories some of the WAGS had shared from their experience and friends experience, the pain was definitely worth it in the end. At one point, you thought that Brady’s chirp might actually come to fruition and Matt would pass out, since he was starting to look a little pale, but thankfully it never happened and his color returned once that small little cry erupted throughout the room, bringing the both of you to tears as he brushed your hair back and kissed your forehead, whispering small praises as you held the baby on your chest.

Grayson Tkachuk proved to be every bit his father. From the moment he was born— he was just always fussy. Fussy when he was tired, when he was hungry, when he was and and even when he was happy, he couldn’t stay still and couldn’t stay quiet. You were thankful that both of yours and Matt’s parents stayed around for a few weeks to help you and Matt adjust to parenting, especially you since right after Grayson was born, that following week was the Flames longest road series of the season.

Your late night FaceTimes with Matt and even the ones he had on free days, you could see that he was feeling sad and even a bit guilty that he wasn’t there to help you out. But you assured him that your parents were a great help and that if he felt so bad, he could change the first dirty diaper Grayson had the moment Matt came back. “Sure, it can’t be that bad.”

Matt came back late one night, your parents were all away in their guest rooms and you were struggling to fall asleep after Grayson’s last feeding. You felt gross, tired and in desperate need of a shower, but that didn’t stop Matt from cuddling you into the bed and kissing you endlessly.

“How’s my baby?” He mumbled, kissing along your jaw.

“He’s sleeping, thankfully.”

“No, my other baby.” He laughed, leaning up on an elbow. “You, you dork.”

“Oh, I’m—“ Graysons cry came through the baby monitor and you sighed, nudging him away and standing up. “I’m feeling like that.”

He shook his head and for up with you. “Come on, let’s go see our baby.”

You walked down the hall to Graysons nursery, his cries getting louder as you neared the crib. You knew what kind of cry it was, ready to tell Matt what he needed before he picked up Grayson and shook his head. “His butt is heavy.”

“Diaper change, Matty.” You laughed, walking with him over tot he changing table. You helped Matt get Grayson undressed from his onesie, Matt instantly gagging at the smell the was coming from Grayson.

“Oh my God, it’s leaking!” He groaned, shoving his nose into the crook of his elbow and looking at you with pleasing eyes. “He burst the diaper.” 

“You called dibs on the first diaper change of your return home. You smiled, leaning up and kissing his cheek as you patted his shoulder. “Welcome to fatherhood, Matty.”

++

Eight years and three kids later,  you’d become all too familiar with those signs of pregnancy— or so you thought you had. Grayson was a random positive pregnancy test, Madelyn was a ‘watch your period tracking app religiously’ planned kind of pregnancy and Sienna was not quite planned, since you found out you were pregnant with her only 7 months after having Madelyn.

You and Matt loved having the three of them so close in age—Eight, six and five— and while the three were also at each other’s throats over the smallest of things, toys, food, who’s car seat went where, they were also all extremely close. Most mornings, it wasn’t rare to find both girls cuddled with their big brother in his bed, or him sleeping on the floor in between their beds.

Their favorite time of the year, which also happened to be yours and Matt’s as well, was when both families got together at the Tkachuk’s lake house during the week leading up to the 4th of July. It was endless days of laughter, watching your kids play with their cousin and coo over the newest and smallest member, a baby boy Emma and Brady had welcomed only two months earlier, making their four year old son Tucker, a big brother.

Nights spent grilling out and enjoying the night summertime air only to wake up early the next morning to go out on the water— you loved it all. It was arguably the best time of the year.

Until the worst stomach cramps you ever felt in your entire life, ended up with Matt rushing you to the hospital where doctors listened to your assumptions of maybe it being your appendix. It was...a pleasant surprise when they came back and told you that you were pregnant before being told to relax while they brought an ultrasound tech in to make sure that everything was going okay.

“Pregnant.” You huffed, rolling up the tank top and stuffing it beneath your bathing suit top. “Pregnant! I was just pregnant!”

“Actually...it’s been awhile, five years. We wanted to wait a bit since Mads and Sie were so close in age.” He replied, spinning himself around in the stool. “And hey, with this being baby number four, we reached our goal.”

“And after baby number four, I’m staying celibate.” You mumbled.

You went back on birth control after Sienna was born, but it just never agreed with you. Through the last five years, you’d been through the implant, the pill, the iud— and all of them messed with your hormones so much that you and Matt went strictly back to condoms, much to both of your disdain for them.

“Alright, Y/N, I’m here to check to see what’s going on with your little one today,” the tech smiled, walking into the room. “Not your first rodeo?” She laughed, picking up the gel as she nodded at your rolled up t-shirt.

“Our fourth.” You replied, no longer phased by the cold feeling against your skin.

“Well congratulations again,” she smiled, turning on the ultrasound machine before picking up the wand. “I assume that you know what this is?”

You and Matt both nodded as she placed the wand against your belly, moving it around. “Can we do that thing we did with Madelyn? Guess the gender and whoever’s right gets to pick the name?” Matt smiled, holding your hand as he rested his chin on your arm.

“As long as you don’t turn it into a bet with your teammates.” You nodded, glaring at him. “I’m still not amused with the fact you almost let Sienna’s middle name be Sam because Sam guessed the gender correctly.”

“Sam’s not too bad—“

“Sienna Sam Tkachuk?” You asked, raising an eyebrow. “It doesn’t flow Matthew! If this is a boy, we’ll let him use his winning bet as a middle name, but no more bets with the guys.”

The ultrasound tech laughed as Matt started to blush. “Okay, agreed.” He said, kissing your knuckles before looking towards the tech. “So how’s baby number four looking?”

“Well, you’re definitely not around 8 weeks like you thought you were. You’re more around 12 weeks and the babies are doing great. The pain you felt was probably more having to do with your pelvic floor trying to prepare for them.”

“See, babe? The babies are fine.” Matt smiled, looking at you before snapping his head back to her. “Wait, babies?”

“Babies,” she smiled, turning the screen towards the both of you and pointing at the three different figures on the screen. “Baby A, Baby B and Baby C, and they’re all looking good in measurements and I don’t see any worry you should be having.”

Your jaw dropped and you felt Matt’s grip on your hand fall as the both of you stared at the screen in shock. “Babies...plural...three,” you said, letting out a small laugh. “Triplets?! I’m having triplets?!”

“Mhhm, and I’ll get these scans for you. But just know that they’re doing great and with multiples, your doctor is probably going to want you to check in a lot more. So when you go back home, be sure to make an appointment as soon as you can.” She smiled, handing you a paper towel before walking to leave the room.

Matt got up and walked towards the screen, staring at it before squatting down beside you and staring at your belly, poking it. “Huh...I guess I can kinda see a bump. I can’t believe there’s three mini us’s in there.” He turned to you with a big smile, only to let it falter as soon as he saw your glaring eyes.

“You’re getting a vasectomy. That’s final.”

[sweetyyhippyy]

Part of You. Spencer Reid x OC! Character. Chapter 13.

Chapter 13: Planning

Summary: Bridgett freaks out and panics when she waits on the results of a very important test. She forgets about it and Spencer finds it. Planning for their future ensues. 

TW: Mentions of pregnancy, language, slight mention of injury and blood, dirty talk, talk of breeding, fingering, orgasm denial (non intentional). 

Word Count: 2.9k

A.N.: Guess who almost forgot to post today? 😳 This is chapter 10 Spencer as well! Next chapter out on Saturday!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bridgett sits on the edge of her bathtub, picking at the hangnail on her thumb, her leg bouncing up and down quickly as she waits for the timer to go off. Bridgett was now officially almost 7 weeks late, and now she was starting to panic. Spencer and her hadn’t been extremely cautious the entirety of their relationship, even the night in Idaho they weren’t careful, but they were careful enough to not be worried about the outcome. She looks at the timer on her phone, how the hell had it only been 30 seconds?

How am I going to tell Spencer? How am I going to tell the team? Can I even still work if I’m pregnant? JJ worked. Just not in the field. Do I still even want to work after I have the baby? What am I going to name the baby? Is it going to look like me, or Spencer? What if I have twins? Nana Rosie is a twin. Twins run in the family. Am I going to let my family see the baby? Am I going to tell my family I’m having a baby? Why did you let him cum in you, you idiot?!

“Bridgett?” Spencer’s voice echoes through her apartment.

“I-uh-I’m in the bathroom. Hold on!” She yells back, grabbing the test and throwing it in one of the drawers in the sink.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!

Bridgett flips the sink handle on quickly to drown out the sound of her panic.

Well you gave him the key! Of course he’s going to come over unannounced, you dummy.

“Okay, you’re fine. Relax. Just don’t mention the fact you might have his child growing inside you!” Bridgett whisper yells to herself in the mirror. She wets the rag hanging up on the wall and presses it against her face, taking deep breaths before drying her face and shutting the water off and heading out to see her boyfriend. Bridgett can hear him fiddling around in the kitchen, one of the pans falling to the floor loudly, Spencer cussing to himself. Bridgett laughs, making him turn around.

“Hi.” He smiles innocently, picking the pan up off the floor and putting it in her sink.

Bridgett smiles, leaning up to kiss him. “Hi my love. Whatcha doing?”

“Well, I wanted to make you dinner since tomorrow is a special day and we have work tomorrow. And these… are for you.” Spencer pulls a bouquet of flowers out from behind his back, trying to play it off as a magic trick but he really pulled them off the counter behind him. But Bridgett wasn’t going to let him know she knew his secret.

“Aww, thank you baby. They’re very pretty.” She gushes, kissing him twice. “Can you hand me the tall vase up there above your head?”

“I should tell you, one of the flowers is fake. I also have this card for you.” He says, pulling the card out of his satchel.

It was a homemade card, cut in the shape of a heart. She pouted her lip out exaggerated, making puppy dog eyes at him. It could have been the possible pregnancy hormones, or the fact that her boyfriend was the sweetest person on the face of this earth, but she could have cried right then.

“You gotta read it too.” Spencer says, beaming down at her.

Bridgett opens the card, a short message written on the inside.

“My love for you will last until the final flower dies. I will forever be grateful that I have you and have the pleasure of loving you. -Spencer”

Bridgett melts into his arms, nuzzling into his chest. “I love you so much, Spence.”

“I love you too.” He responds, pressing a kiss to her head. “I’m going to make a little surprise first for you in the kitchen, why don’t you go take a nap, because you need to not be anywhere in there.” Spencer says, gripping her shoulders and turning her around toward her room.

“Are you kicking me out of my own kitchen?” Bridgett laughs at Spencer herding her out of the room and into her room.

“Take a nap, and I’ll come join you in about an hour.”

“Okay.” She responds, kissing his lips lightly. “Just don’t burn my kitchen down.”

Spencer rolls his eyes teasingly and shuts the door behind him. Bridgett kicks her shorts off and climbs into bed, snuggling underneath her sheets.

***

“Bridge?... Bridge?... Bridgy?” Spencer calls her name, softly shaking her shoulder. Bridgett finally jumps awake, her eyes wide as she looks at Spencer. Once she registers that it was Spencer she lays her head back down on the pillow.

“Hmm?”

“Do you uh… have band aids? I had an incident.”

Bridgett lifts her head to look at where his wound was but Spencer hid his hands behind his back where she couldn’t see.

“In my bathroom. First drawer on your left. Are you bleeding to death?”

“No! I’m…” Spencer stops mid sentence, his voice tapering off.

Bridgett waits for him to finish his thought but the room falls silent again.

“Spence?” Bridgett calls out, lifting her head again. The door to her bedroom was still open but she could see the light to her bathroom reflecting under the door. “Spence? Did you find them?” She asks again, kicking the sheets off and crawling out of bed . Bridgett pushes the door open and sees Spencer still standing in her bathroom, his back turned away from her.

“Spence? Are you okay? Did you hurt yourself that bad?”

Spencer turns around, the blue and white stick in his hand.

Shit.

“Shit.” Bridgett sighs, gnawing at her bottom lip.

“Are you… are you pregnant?” Spencer asks, looking back at the test.

“I don’t know… I took the test and was waiting and then I heard you come in so I threw it in the drawer and forgot about it.”

“Do you think you are?”

Bridgett shrugs her shoulders, “I’m late. I didn’t get my period last month and I was supposed to get it a week and a half ago and it never came so I just wanted to see. It could be a lot of reasons why I’m late but me being pregnant could be a big reason. We’ve never been careful, and I’ve been lax on my birth control.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you’re late sooner? Tell me you were going to take a test?”

“Because why worry you unless it’s real? I don’t think having a baby is something both of us really want… at least not right now. Right?”

“I always figured if you got pregnant, then it just happened and you would decide what you wanted to do from there, if not then we would just wait until we were ready.”

“Are the results still on there?” Bridgett asks, walking up to Spencer. He shows her the test, the screen reading.

Inconclusive

“Damn it. I’m going to have to take another one.”

“Do you want me to run to the store and get you another test?” Spencer questions, throwing the stick in the trash.

“No, the box comes with two. I didn’t take the other one. I can actually do it now.” Bridgett says, grabbing the extra test and opening the wrapper around it. Spencer stayed in place, watching her.

“Spence… I would rather you not watch me please.”

“Right, sorry.” He awkwardly replies, exiting the room.

Spencer paces around the living room waiting for Bridgett to be done. His head was swimming with “What if’s”. And maybe he was a little excited to possibly be a dad, it might not have been when he wanted, but he’s always heard people say “You’re never fully ready to be a parent.” And maybe they weren’t ready but they would figure it out together.

“Okay we have to wait 3 minutes.” Bridgett says, walking into the living room to see Spencer still pacing. “You’re nervous.”

“Ye-yeah a little bit. Aren’t you?”

Bridgett sits on the couch crisscross, patting the spot next to her. Spencer joins her on the couch, putting his hands on top of hers that were shaking a little bit.

“Yeah of course I am. This definitely wasn’t in our plans but if I’m pregnant… then we’re going to be parents.” She laughs a little bit. “And I’m kind of excited to possibly raise a baby with you.”

“Yeah, I am too.” Spencer says, kissing the back of her hand. “And I hope they look like you.”

Maybe being possibly pregnant wasn’t absolutely horrible. Sure Spencer was scared, but he was taking it a lot easier than Bridgett thought he was. There was no doubt that Spencer was going to be the world’s best dad, especially since his own father wasn’t there.

“Since when has 3 minutes felt like 3 hours?” Spencer complains.

“This is my second time waiting, trust me I know the feeling.”

The pair sat together trying to find anything to talk about to distract them from how slow time was actually moving. But everything that they talked about somehow led back to Bridgett potentially being pregnant.

Finally the timer that Bridgett had set went off, both Spencer and Bridgett getting up from the couch together and walking to the bathroom. Bridgett walks in by herself, picking up the plastic stick and looking at the digital screen. Bridgett bit her bottom lip to avoid making the face she wanted to make.

Disappointed.

Bridgett looks over at Spencer, handing him the test with a sad look on her face.

“No?” Spencer questions, taking it from her and looking for himself.

“No. I guess my body is stressed out and that’s why I’m late. But I’m not pregnant.” She responds, a hint of disappointment in her tone.

Spencer kisses her shoulder, trying to make her feel better.

“I’m sorry, baby. I know it was a scary thought at first, but then once we started talking about it, the thought of having a baby with you sounded perfect.”

“Maybe we should talk some more about it.” Bridgett says matter of factly.

“Yeah? You want to start a family?”  Spencer asks, trying to suppress a smile from creeping across his face.

“Come lay down with me in bed and we can talk about it.”

Both of them walk out into her bedroom, Spencer crawling in first and Bridgett laying right on top of him, laying her head on his chest and Spencer’s fingers playing with her hair instantly.

“So, you’re serious about wanting a baby with me?” Spencer asks after a few seconds of silence.

“Yeah, if I wasn’t serious I wouldn’t continue having unprotected sex with you. We’ve been together for 5 years, you know minus me leaving for a year and then you know you were involved with someone else when I came back. You’ve been a part of my life for 8 years and I would like to think it’s time to maybe be a ‘conventional’ couple and have a baby… or two.”

“Or two? Let’s get past the first one and then we’ll talk about a second one.”

“Maybe we should try for… hmmm 6.” Bridgett jokes, turning onto her belly to see her boyfriend's reaction.

Spencer gives off a fake laugh, rolling his head against the pillow under him. “I don’t think so. We can talk about having…” Spencer pauses, thinking before he answers. “Three. Maybe 4. 4 might take some convincing.”’

“I think both you and I know I can be very good at convincing.” Bridgett says with a playful smile on her face. She sits up on her knees, pulling Spencer up to sit up against her headboard, he licks his lips as Bridgett climbs in his lap, smirking at him as she settles into him, rubbing his face.

“You think you have me wrapped around your finger don’t you, pretty girl?”

“Ask the team, they’ll confirm you are. It’s not a bad thing. I like that you’d do anything to make me happy. Because I’d do the same.”

Spencer kisses her lips softly, careful not to make any sudden moves that would lead to the multiple rounds of sex they were going to have anyways.

“You do a lot to make me happy, Bridgy. You didn’t complain about going to the Edgar Allen Poe puppet theater with me even though I know you didn’t want to go. Or any of the lectures you’ve gone with me to. All the Doctor Who episodes you’ve sat through.”

“I want to make your nerdy brain happy.” Bridgett smiles, kissing him again, wrapping her arms around his neck and moaning into his mouth. She quickly pulls back from the kiss.

“You know I mean ‘nerdy’ in the most loving way possible, right?”

Spencer laughs, squeezing her cheeks in his hands, making her look like a little chipmunk. “Yes I know.”

Bridgett nods her head, going back in for a kiss. It wasn’t long before both of them were shirtless and needy for each other, Spencer nipping at the skin on her exposed chest when Bridgett pulls back from the kiss for air, which makes her whine.

“Are you trying to make a baby tonight?” Bridgett jokes, feeling Spencer’s soft touch on her shoulder blade while he sucks the light tan skin of her collarbone. Bridgett gasps, feeling him lick the bruise he was making.

“Why not? We could try for a Halloween baby.” He whispers in her ear. “We both love Halloween.” Spencer’s fingers slipping underneath her underwear and diving right into her soaking wet middle.

Bridgett’s head falls back a sigh of relief echoing in the room, feeling his fingers slip inside her. “Sounds like a plan.” She responds, drowning everything else going on in her mind out and focusing on the pleasure her boyfriend was giving her.

“Lay down right here in between my legs.” Spencer says, assisting Bridgett down onto her back. She rests her legs on both sides of Spencer’s upper thighs, open to him, but a fabric barrier standing between what Spencer was craving. He pulls the waistband down her hips, Bridgett lifting her butt up to get them all the way off.

“So pretty.” Spencer says low, massaging both sides of her inner thighs. Bridgett watches Spencer’s face as he studies her body;  every curve she has, the stretch marks she was still insecure about, the cute moles scattered throughout her stomach. He gives his middle and ring finger a coating of spit then slides his fingers back inside her. Spencer loved being able to see her full body reaction to his touch. She massaged her nipples as he played with the wetness, moaning softly.

“I love you, Spence.”

Spencer looks over at her angelic face, her brown eyes were half open but were focused on him.

“I love you too. Just think, in a few months we’re going to have proof of our love. You want me to put a baby in you?”

Bridgett didn’t know what it was, but hearing Spencer ask if he wanted her to put a baby in her made her clench around his fingers. It turned her on to hear him want to take their relationship to the next level.

“Yes. I want you to put a baby in me, Spence. I want to have your baby.”

His fingers continued to thrust in and out of her dripping core, trying to quickly coax an orgasm out of her before fucking her. Bridgett stared at him, the best she could, as he fingered her. She almost wanted to take a picture of the way his mouth was parted, his tongue licking his lips every so often which made his lips look so plump and kissable. Spencer could tell when she was close every single time by the way her body tensed, and her walls got more slick, and this time was no different.

“Oh shit.” He cusses, pulling his fingers out of her quickly, making Bridgett whine loudly and desperately. Spencer awkwardly gets out of bed and runs out of the room.

Bridgett rolls onto her stomach, laying flat against her mattress, annoyed that she was denied her orgasm seconds before overcoming her.  A few minutes pass and Spencer comes back in quietly, laying his head against the small of her back, kissing her bare skin.

“I’m mad at you.” She mumbles, her face still buried in the mattress. “I was so close.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I was so distracted that I forgot about the cake I was making you in the oven… it’s kinda good I remembered because I didn’t burn it.”

“I would have rather you let me cum.” She mutters, still not looking at Spencer.

Spencer snorts, wrapping his arms around her body, placing kisses on her back. “Can I at least show it to you before you stay mad at me?”

Bridgett turns her head to look at her boyfriend, narrowing her eyes at him before turning back over and getting out of bed, throwing her T-shirt back on and slipping her underwear back on. Spencer looks at her, proud of his work. Bridgett looks at the cake pan that was in the shape of a heart, the closer she looks at the cake she noticed it was a giant cookie.

“Awww you made me a cookie cake?”

“Yeah, I know you’re not a huge fan of birthday cake and you like cookies better so I made this.” Spencer looked like a toddler who was showing off their drawing they made.

Bridgett grabs Spencer’s cheek and kisses him sweetly. “I love you, so, so much. Why are you so perfect?”

Spencer kisses her forehead twice, “I love you too. I still have some stuff to do to finish it, but I need to finish something else first.” He says, pulling her arm to bring her closer.

“And what would that be?”

“I think you know.  Baby time.”

[eideticmemory]

FINE LINE | SPENCER REID

Two decades and two children later, you and your ex-husband learn to navigate the world of co-parenting.

Word Count: 2,604.

Warning: Daddy issues, mommy issues, angst, drama, romance. Love to see it.

You could feel it. The light illuminating your face, touching it with a gentle heat that made your eyes flutter open. Your head felt heavy, as if your neck was attempting to support the weight of a canon ball. You rested your skull on the back of the chair you sat in, eyelids dropping just above your irises. Just in the distance, you could make out a cinema screen. Large, blurry, projecting a bright white screen.

Her image appeared in the center of the square, perfect, in place, still. But you could make out the grin on her face. Watching her dark red lips release the words, “Hello, sleepyhead.”

You could just barely muster up the strength to part your lips, pushing out a small gust of air. It was hot and made your mouth feel like it was on fire.

“H—“

“Oh,” she interrupted you, gently, quietly. You jumped at the feeling of her touching your arm, her palm tight around your forearm. She was cold, freezing, but you could still feel warmth radiating off of her. “I’m afraid you can’t stay too long this time. It’s time to wake up.”

“Hm?” You whined. “Mm?”

“Wake up,” she repeated. “C’mon, wake up. Wake up, wake up, wake u—“

“Up!”

You jolted, violently, harshly, your eyes springing open to reveal the usual sight of your bedsheets.

“Mom, wake up,” an exasperated voice sounded from beside you, the words catching your attention instantly. Tightly.

“Huh?” You mumbled, flickering your eyes up to the figure at your side, sitting on your bed, looking at you with a concerned stare. “Hm?”

“Are you alright?” Eden asked. Sunlight shone on her face, giving her the appearance of an angel. Sent to wake you, pull you back into reality. “What were you dreaming about?”

You let out a long sigh, as if you could even begin to explain your subconscious mind to your 15-year-old daughter. “Oh, y’know,” you whispered, sitting yourself upright and resting back against the headboard. “Just...lions, and tigers, and bears.”

“Oh my,” Eden responded, her big brown eyes concentrated on your face.

You chuckled underneath your breath, and let out a quick huff. “Oh, shoot, is your brother up?”

“He’s up, he’s dressed, he’s fed, and reading the Illiad.”

“Oh?” You stepped out of bed, pulling the duvet over your legs to reveal your pajama pants. “What happened to War and Peace?”

“He finished that yesterday.”

“He gets quicker every hour,” you shook your head.

“It’s a genius thing,” Eden shrugged. She fiddled with the ends of her hair, watching the strands brush over her fingers as she chewed her lip. “Hey, mom?”

“Yeah, kid?” You replied, standing in the bathroom mirror as you began to get ready for the day.

“You—you know dad, right?”

You stopped in your tracks, any and all movements coming to a halt. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and you spun on your heels, slowly, until you came face to face with Eden. “Uh . . . your dad?”

“Yes.”

“Tall? Long, brown hair? Hazel eyes? Has a birthmark on his right thigh?” You listed, toothbrush hanging from your mouth.

“Ew,” Eden cringed. “Yes.”

“Never met him in my life,” you shrugged.

“Mom.”

“Kid,” you tilted your head, face softening as you realized how nervous she was. “What’s up?”

She sighed, ducking her head down to avoid eye contact. “I invited him to my sweet 16.”

“Oh.” It came out like reflex. You said the word before you could fully process the information.

“Are you mad?”

“No—huh? E,” you rushed to sit beside her. “You don’t have to hide inviting your father from me—you—you don’t have to invite your father at all. He’s always welcome to visit on your birthday. And of course he should be at your sweet sixteen.”

“Really?” Eden questioned, eyebrows raised. “So, it will be a nice day? A nice party? Everyone will be nice to everyone?”

“Yes, yes, girl scouts honor.”

“Good,” she nodded, a satisfied smile on her face. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen him.”

“Oh, babe,” you murmured, tucking her hair behind her ear. “It—“

“Mom!” A shrill voice struck both of you with fear, coming out of nowhere.

“Yes, my love?” You directed at Emerson, watching him fidget with his hands in the doorway. His shaggy brown hair covered his face slightly and his button up was tucked into his khaki shorts.

“My chess tournament starts soon, are you coming?” He asked.

“I wouldn’t miss it for anything in the world, kiddo. You and your sister go downstairs while I get dressed.”

They’re obedient, your kids. Kind, driven, smart — with an average IQ of 187.5. The could take over the world if they really, really wanted to. But they don’t. They just want to go out for pizza, and get their twenty dollar allowance every week, hang out with their friends, focus on school, and . . . to see their father. You solemnly set your toothbrush down in the bathroom, looking at yourself in the mirror — tired, worn out, nauseous from another . . . dream? Nightmare? You’re not sure, and frankly, you don’t want to think about it.

So, you pushed on. You got dressed, fixed your hair, used light makeup to cover your exhaustion. Stepping out into the bedroom, your eyes quickly fell on your cellphone — the device laying on your bedside dresser. Hands on your hips, you shook your head, telling yourself not to do it. It’s not necessary, it’s overbearing to even think about.

Then, you remembered who you were dealing with here. And you rushed over to picked up the phone.

“[y/n] Reid,” he beamed. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“I heard you talked to E,” you whispered, pacing back and forth in your bedroom.

“I did,” Spencer confirmed. “She called me the other day.”

“To invite you to her birthday party.”

“Yes.”

“And are you planning on coming?” You asked.

“Of course I’m planning on coming. It’s my daughter’s sixteenth birthday.”

“Right, right, it’s not like you missed her fifteenth, or thirteenth, or her twelfth, or her actual birth, or anything.”

“[y/n]—”

“Listen, I didn’t call to argue, or even talk,” you sighed. “I just called to tell you that this party isn’t an option. You will be here Saturday at 10 o’clock sharp, you will help decorate, you will spend time with your children, and you will make this the best damn day Eden Reid has ever had. Understood?”

“I have to help decorate?”

“Spencer—“

“I will be there. 10 o’clock. I will help decorate, I will spend time with my children, I will make this the best damn day Eden Reid has ever had. I understand.”

You released a quiet huff, like your lungs couldn’t stand to hold the breath any longer. “Thank you.”

Spencer let out a soft, sad laugh, “Haven’t done that in a while.”

Chess gives you anxiety. You understand it. You can conceptualize it, and even play it. Well. But the bubbling in your stomach every time you witnessed a game — particually one where your eight year old son is playing — comes back to haunt you again and again. You don’t worry about Emerson, he can take care of himself. He’s like his father in that way, the game is in his blood. But the tension, the speed, the risk. It made your breath lodge in your chest, and every so often, you had to sigh to regain control.

The only thing that could pull you from that stress is Em. Emerson Derek Reid, the little half smile on his face when he wins a match. It makes the three hour tournaments worth it. Watching your boy play against college level students who have been playing all their lives. Yeah, so has he.

He jumps off stage in an excited state, rushing towards you with open arms. “You’re a tiger, kid!” You exclaim. “You killed it.”

“Thank you, thank you,” he shrugged. “It’s really my opponents’ fault, they wouldn’t know a queen from a rook if it was looking them in the face.”

“Ooh, cat fight.” E remarked, causing Em and you to laugh.

“Hey,” you said. “Since you’re both already out of school today . . . wanna play hookie?”

“Mom? I am shocked!” E gasped, trying hard to contain a laugh.

“Oh, c’mon, we never get to hang out anymore since you guys started these college classes and my business went up. I’m off work, you’re already out of class, let’s just do it. Let’s go shop and eat and hang out and I will write you guys an excuse for tomorrow, okay?” You rambled, putting your hands to their shoulders.

Em and E looked at each other, and after a minute, they looked up at you and nodded.

Your very, very favorite people on the whole planet.

You took them to the mall. Bought Em some new clothes, but he wasn’t really interested. You and E did most of the picking. He sat in the corner of the store reading and only participated to try on outfits you guys had picked out. You both squealed and told him how cute he looked, and he scrunched up his nose. Just like . . .

And then you bought E some shoes, some vans. There was a huge sell, and she fell in love with everything she tried on. And you fell in love with seeing her happy so you ran up a bill.

“Okay, which one of us is dying?” E said as you sat at lunch. Em bursted out laughing.

“Wha—neither of you! I just wanted to spoil you guys. You kill yourselves all week with school, even though it’s summer. And I never see you, that’s all.”

“Mhm,” Em hummed, an unconvinced look in his face as he eyed his sister. “I bet someone died.”

“Em!” You exclaimed, E’s laughter blending in. “God, you guys are morbid.”

“Our parents both worked in the FBI, we’re basically trained,” E giggled.

Just then, you got a call. Work. Fuck. You stood from the table and stepped outside, excusing yourself first.

“[y/n].”

“Can we close the Pickett case tonight?”

“Raven . . .”

“I don’t want that boy in that house for one more second. [y/n], I will send you more of my notes, but . . . read them, read them. You will understand. Please.”

You sighed, “I’ll be there at ten. If you are not there at ten . . . I’ll wait for you. Let’s do it.”

“Thank you! Thank you, thanks! Bye. Sorry. Bye.”

You took in a deep breath and shook your head.

Nothing was going to spoil your lunch. Not today.

The car ride home, the three of you vibed to music. Your kids knew every word to Fleetwood Mac’s discography and it was your greatest accomplishment. They even developed their own dance routine to Dreams when they were younger.

Your very, very favorite people on the whole planet.

You pulled up to your house, and as you approached the driveway, you saw a familiar car parked out front. Your stomach flipped, caved in, skipped, hopped, and jumped.

Words can’t even described what it did when you saw him.

Sitting on the porch swing.

“Dad?” Em exclaimed loudly in excitement. You parked in the driveway, eyeing Spencer the whole time.

“Dad?” E said quietly, confusion in her voice. “Did you—“ She directed at you, interrupted by her brother hopping out of the car.

Em ran up to Spencer, and his father scooped him up in a quick motion, spinning him around and kissing his head.

You let out a quick huff, turned to E and smiled, “C’mon, go say hi.”

You followed E out of the car, and watched as she tip toed towards Spencer. She suddenly skipped and jumped into Spencer’s arms.

“Hey, dad,” she said.

“Hey, kid!” He replied, before putting her on her feet. “Your hair is getting so long!”

“Yeah,” she twirled her hair and laughed. “What are you doing here!”

“I wanted to see you guys . . .” He turned to you. “And your mom, who’s quiet as a mouse.”

“Hello,” you shrugged, giving him a kind smile.

“Are you staying for today, dad?” Em asked, tucked under Spencer’s arm.

“I was actually hoping to stay until Sunday, if that’s okay with your mom, of course.”

Your very, very least favorite person on the whole planet.

“Please, mom? He can be here for my birthday!” E pipped.

Em. E. Em. E. Those big, pouty eyes of theirs staring you down. “You can stay in the guest room,” you told Spencer.

“Is that close to your bedroom?” Spencer smirked.

“Heh,” you huffed. “Don’t push it. You can stay upstairs.”

“Yes! C’mon, dad! I made a new model that I wanna show you!”

Later that night, you made the kids pasta. It was one of your finer cuisines, taught to you by an old friend, and they asked for it all the night, especially when they needed to study.

Spencer wandered into the kitchen after getting settled upstairs. “Woah! I thought we could go out for dinner, huh? My treat?”

“We would, dad,” Eden said. “But we both have tests tomorrow. Calculus and Physics. Maybe tomorrow.”

You set their plates down and looked up at Spencer. You walked over to him, eyeing him knowingly as you led him out of the kitchen.

“They’re nerds,” Spencer laughed.

“They’ve also both got an eidetic memory. It’s gonna take them all of three minutes to study, then they’ll be all over you again,” you told him, walking out onto the back patio.

Following you, Spencer closed the door behind him, isolating you two on the porch.

You sat down, plopped down, and looked up at him, “Why are you here?”

“Subtle.”

“Spencer.”

“I mean it, you should be a federal agent.”

“Spencer.”

He sighed heavily, “I have some things I want to . . . handle.”

“Here?” You asked.

“Yes,” he hesitated. “I haven’t been enough a part of the kids’ lives—“

You rolled yours eyes. Yeah, you knew that.

“I want to fix that, to have a real relationship with them.” He continued.

“You’ve always been able to,” you shrugged. “You get distracted.”

“Work,” he muttered.

“Always is.”

“And . . .” he whispered, his eyes flickering back and forth between you and the ground.

You furrowed your eyebrows, “And?”

“I — I want to fix my relationship with you.”

Huh.

“I want us to go to therapy.”

Huh.

“Wha—“ You stuttered, rising from your seat. “Spencer, what?”

“Not couples therapy. Nothing . . . romantic,” his voice cracked. “But we can’t keep acting so . . . poorly around the kids. They’re smart, they notice things. They always have.”

“Spencer, how are we gonna go to therapy? You’d need to dig up Freud himself and have him work on us full time.”

“I just think we need to talk,” he murmured. He stepped closer to you, breathing deeply as he towered over you. “Will you please just think about it?”

You stared him in the eye, let out a heavy exhale.

Spencer.

[minghellafine]

Full interview below.

The first thing Max Minghella does when he joins our Zoom call is ask me about the weather. It wasn't just a conversational cliché though, he really wanted to know what it was like where I was. I tell him I'm in New York City, where spring can surprise you with a day that's colder or warmer than it looks. This particular day was chilly. "I'm always cold," he interjects, "I'm reptilian. My body finds a way to keep me cool." He shivered as he spoke, sitting in his sunny backyard in Los Angeles wearing a T-shirt. I checked the temperature right after our call. It was 80 degrees in L.A.

Despite any discomfort, Minghella is just really happy to be at home. Unlike the millions of people who spent 2020 in quarantine, he was working on season four of The Handmaid's Tale throughout the spring and summer."I'm sort of jealous of people who have this moment to pause and reflect," he says soberly. "Even with all of the trauma it's caused and all the things that obviously were detrimental, I know a lot of people who've had big life changes in the past year."

He acknowledged, however, that creating something in a time when everyone wished they could escape was ultimately a lucky thing. "There was a ubiquitous sense of gratitude," he adds.

Outside of the global pandemic, the dynamics on set had shifted — this season, his co-star Elisabeth Moss (or "Lizzie" as he affectionately calls her), was a director. "She was amazing on set," he explained. "Just very in control and it ran super smoothly. When I saw the episodes she directed, it just kind of blew me away. Her style — it's very cinematic and it really underlines the sci-fi elements of the show. It has a real kind of scope and confidence to it. I think she's a real filmmaker."

RELATED: Marvel's New Face Danny Ramirez Has the Range

Minghella's character Nick has an interesting arc this season too –  he's realizing his role as a senior member of the Gilead ruling class, but also still in love with June [Moss]. It's a complex character that challenges you as an audience member. He is the brooding love interest, and while you may root for him and June to be together, you also have to see him for what he is: an architect of a world that kidnaps women and uses them for childbearing.

What made the previous three seasons of the show even harder for viewers to digest was the fact that people so badly wanted to believe there could be a good guy defector — maybe even Nick — in a room full of bad guys. During those years, many people felt that the dystopian elements of the show were reflective of the nationalist agenda being put forth in the United States by the Trump Administration. So much so that a group of protesters famously wore Handmaid costumes to protest anti-abortion bills and Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh's confirmation hearings. Without saying much about the parallels in the show — other than chalking them up to "pure coincidence," Minghella felt the Handmaid's Tale, whose protagonists are anti-Gilead, are "on the right side of history."  He added diplomatically, "Ultimately, I'm most proud because I think it's really great fiction."

I get the sense that the pursuit of "great fiction" is something that consumes Minghella. He's someone who appreciates art (he got his big break in 2006's Art School Confidential), and his parents are Anthony Minghella, the late award-winning director of The Talented Mr. Ripley, and actress Carolyn Choa. He loves details (see our earlier weather conversation). Even the way he talks about Los Angeles has a story-like quality. He tells me about how he knew when the city became his home after a feeling he got driving past the Silver Lake 7-Eleven. As he told it, I pictured it like a scene in an indie movie starring Zach Braff.

"I had this sort of pathological obsession with movies from birth. [My mother] worked for the British equivalent of the Motion Picture Association, so she would watch three films a day. By three or four years old, I was just kind of an obsessed movie person." It's his favorite movie, Beverly Hills Cop ("I think I saw 100 times by the time I was eight years old," he says) that inspired another big role he was working on during quarantine: Minghella stars as a detective opposite Chris Rock in the Saw franchise spin-off Spiral: From the Book of Saw.

"The movie was so serendipitous for me. I feel like I almost manifested it in my life," Minghella muses. "There's a line very early in the movie where we're investigating these crime scenes and we come to a grizzly one. My character looks nauseous. Chris's [character] says to me, 'Are you okay?' And my character says, 'Yeah. I mean I'd been dreaming about this since I was 12-years-old.' And that was a very kind of weird line because it's just true."

Now at 35 years old, Minghella is feeling settled. He is still a "film nerd" that gets giddy with each new opportunity, but he's less anxious about the results. Next thing on his list? Vacation.

"I'm hoping in May once the movie comes out I can run away somewhere."

Read on for his cheesy would-be campaign slogan, his fast-food weakness, and the time he escaped a tornado while working on a film with Blake Lively.

Who is your celebrity crush?

Mary Tyler Moore.

What's the last thing you do before you fall asleep?

I listen to 1950s radio shows. Usually Dragnet. I was researching a project in that period briefly and got sort of into the radio culture of that time. And now I find it incredibly soothing.

Favorite villain?

Hans Gruber.

Describe a memorable dream.

I had a recurring nightmare as a child in which my grandmother turned into a cat. So Tom Hooper's Cats was very traumatizing to me.

First album you ever owned?

My mother bought me the Top Gun soundtrack on audio cassette.

If you were required to spend $1,000 today, what would you buy and why?

I would do anything to help a distressed dog.

If you ran for office, what would your slogan be?

Some kind of tacky pun using my first name. "Take it to the Max," or maybe "Max on, Max off."

Name one place you've never been but have always wanted to go.

Easy. Japan. I went when I was one, but I don't think that counts.

What's the most uncomfortable outfit you've ever worn?

I did a film called Art School Confidential and I had to wear a beret and I found every moment of it truly humiliating. I remember being completely traumatized by it.

Describe your first kiss.

My first kiss was at a bus stop. I was 14 and I lied and told the girl that it wasn't my first kiss, but I think it was probably immediately evident that it was.

What's one dish you're always tempted to order if you see it on a menu?

There are so many things. That's the sad answer. French fries is the truth.

Favorite on-set memory?

I did a movie called Elvis and Anabelle with Blake Lively like 100 years ago and we shot in Texas. There was a tornado one night that forced us to evacuate the set and we had to sort of drive off in a hurry. I put on this song by The Knife called "Pass This On" in the car which is very dramatic and cinematic. The tornado was sort of in pursuit of the vehicle while we were speeding away. And it was just far enough that it wasn't life-threatening, but also a radical visual. That's one of my favorite life memories.

The Handmaid's Tale season 4 premieres on Hulu April 28, and Spiral: From the Book of Saw hits theaters on May 11.

Photographs by Emily Malan. Grooming by Sonia Lee for Exclusive Artists using La Mer. Polaroid Photos by Max Minghella. Special thanks to Polaroid. Production by Kelly Chiello.

[smallheathgangsters]

Second Youngest | S!S

A/N: I’m sorry, I really struggled with this one, but I hope it’s okay. Also, I had to make a few changes to the original request to boost my creativity and to me, it just made a little more sense this way. 

Request: a very long one by @amys-small-world

Shelby!Sister

Word Count: 1826

Type: angst, a little bit of fluff

----------------------------------------------

Life had never been kind to Y/N, from the beginning on. Even her last name didn’t change any of that. Being a Shelby sounded like a privilege, something everyone wanted to be. Nobody daring to disrespect you and receiving everything you ever demanded, no questions asked. But when your own family doesn’t accept you as their own, the Shelby name transforms itself into a burden instead of a blessing. And that burden never went away for Y/N.

Being the second-youngest sibling and unfortunately not sharing the same mother as the others were features that were weighing heavily on her shoulders. Especially the fact that she had resulted out of an affair with a backstreet whore their father had been having behind his wife’s back, spoke for itself. She wasn’t a Shelby the family was proud of. She was the sibling nobody mentioned to anybody. The mistake none of them wanted to talk about. The reason for their mother’s worst heartbreak. Having a fling with a prostitute was one thing, but getting her pregnant? A whole other story.

That meant, that Y/N had to grow up by herself. Even though the Shelby’s took her in right after her birth and made sure to give her a bed to sleep in, food to eat and eventually work to do, they didn’t give her attention, even a second of their time or love at all.

To put it simply, Y/N had no idea what it meant to be loved.

As a child it had been easier, since she had friends to play with at school. But as she grew older, she lost those connections and Polly made sure to keep her inside to do housework instead of fooling around outside and getting into trouble with the other kids. So, Y/N spent most of her days cleaning and cooking for the Shelby household, instead of collecting memories like all the other teenagers.

Never receiving the brotherly protection like Ada had, she’d been forced to fend for herself since. Like the time, when she went grocery shopping by order of Polly and a group of kids her age started following her and calling her names and eventually tripping her, so she fell into a puddle on the street. She returned with her clothes soaked and dirty, making her get a horrible telling off by her aunt. If anything like that had happened to Ada when she’d been Y/N’s age, the boys would have made sure to beat the life out of those kids and that they never even dared to get near her again. But since she was the bastard child her brothers didn’t care about, nobody was there to defend her and keep her safe.

Therefore, the next time she came across the same group of kids, she punched the boy who had tripped her, right across the face, most likely breaking his nose by the cracking sound and his painful screams.

When she returned home, Polly asked her why there was blood on her dress. Y/N didn’t answer, keeping it a secret, like countless other things that would happen in the following years of her life.

At the age of twenty, Y/N was a wreck. Even those four years, when her three eldest brothers were fighting in the war, weren’t any different to the ones before. While Polly had taken over the brothers’ business together with Ada and some other women, Y/N had been tasked with the care of little Finn and the maintenance of the house. It had been acts like those, that made her feel so useless and so out of place. Would she ever be good enough for anything else?

Most nights she cried herself to sleep. She just couldn’t understand how she was still in this awful position. She waited twenty years for her family to hopefully one day change their ways, accept her as a family member and stop acting as if she wasn’t even present. It was horrible knowing that her family was expanding the business without including her even in the slightest way. Was she really that worthless? Why did everybody blame her for something she had no control over? Would this ever change?

It was the day before her twenty-first birthday. Y/N had had a terrible night, waking up multiple times and having awful nightmares, if she did fall asleep. Thoughts about her future had kept her from getting rest. Since the only thing she’d ever done was housekeeping at home and never got to broaden her horizon by finding a job outside, she felt like she could never escape this life she was living. She wanted to be a nurse or a teacher or seamstress. Anything but staying trapped in this state she was in.

Knowing it was still very early in the morning and the rest of the Shelby family was still sound asleep, Y/N rolled out of bed with a groan and put on some clean clothes. She decided that she needed to take a walk in the empty Birmingham streets before her unpleasant daily routine would start over again. She carefully padded down the stairs, making sure the old wood wouldn’t creak too loudly and grabbed her coat before stepping out into the cool, dewy air and closing the door quietly.

This kind of silence was rare. It was just before five o’clock, what meant that even the early risers weren’t awake yet and factories didn’t start their machines before six. Enough time for Y/N to clear her thoughts, to make sure she wouldn’t go crazy today. Because she felt like being at the verge of completely losing it.

She wandered along the cobble, passed little boutiques and bakeries and eventually ended up in front of the catholic church Polly often went to pray in. She wasn’t religious in any means, but she’d always found peace in the serenity inside the church walls. How her heels clicked on the marble floor and the people in the time-consuming paintings on the ceiling kept their eyes on her, giving her all of their attention, unlike her own family.

After entering, Y/N sat down in one of the rear rows, as though she’d be stepping too close to God if she’d gone any further. God, who most likely didn’t care for her or her existence. She sighed, propped up her elbows on her thighs and placed her head in her hands. Then, she let her eyelids close, realising just how tired she was. Lack of sleep being the least relevant one of all the reasons. Feeling the tiredness creeping up on her, consuming her entire body, she stretched herself out on the cold, hard church bench, her eyes not opening even a tiny bit.

She knew she’d fall asleep, but what she didn’t know, was that she’d eventually sleep through the entire morning. The loud bang of the heavy church door slamming against the wall, tore her from her uneasy sleep, making her sit up in panic.

“Y/N? Is that you?”

It was Finn’s voice. She knew immediately that she was in trouble. Although his tone didn’t actually sound very angry.

She wrapped her arms around her body, not answering his question and silently hoping that she’d be overlooked. But that clearly wasn’t going to happen, since she was the only one in the church and she’d stupidly shot up when hearing the alarming noise.

She heard his footsteps get closer and internally prepared herself to be yelled at, and if not from Finn, than from Polly later on. She tried her best to stay strong and hold back the tears forming in her eyes, but it was all too much to handle. She didn’t want to go back home. She wanted to run away or at least just stay here, by herself, as long as she could.

Surprisingly, Finn didn’t grab her by the arm and pull her with him or even tell her to get up. He didn’t say anything at all. He shuffled into the row and sat down next to her.

With her hand in front of her mouth, she muffled the sobs escaping. Then, she felt a hand on her shoulder, squeezing it gently.

“Family’s looking for you,” she heard Finn mumble.

Y/N took away her hand from her mouth and sniffled. “I– I know …”

Finn sighed. “I’m not going to tell them where you are.”

His unexpected statement made her sobs stop immediately. “W–What did you just say?”

Finn pulled back his hand and interlaced his fingers, resting his entangled hands on his thighs. “It’s not that I don’t see my family being very … unfair to you.”

Y/N almost scoffed, but wasn’t able to hold back her eye roll, which Finn noticed. “I totally understand that you’re angry.”

“Angry?”

That was the moment she suddenly couldn’t keep her thoughts from spilling over her lips. “You think I’m angry? Finn, I’m broken. I’m actually so fucking heartbroken. My own family made it their mission to make my life a living hell. I’m over being angry. I just want to leave!”

Her voice was laced with disappointment and hurt. This was the first time she’d ever told somebody the way she was truly feeling.

Finn gave her a sad look. “I’m sorry, Y/N …”

“It’s not your fault, Finn,” she sighed, scratching at the dried-up spots on her hands. “This started even before you were old enough to realise what was happening …”

Finn started chewing on his lip uncomfortably. “I never understood why they didn’t want to accept you. You’re my favourite sibling, you know that?”

Her head turned to her brother, a hint of shock in her face. “What?”

“You were the mother I never had. You took care of me when I was a kid, played with me, cooked for me. I didn’t know that you were forced to do all of that, but I really appreciated it, even at that age. I know I never showed it after I got older and I regret that.”

His words went straight to her heart, making it contract in a way it had never before. Y/N tried to respond something, but her breath just got stuck in her throat, making it unable for her to speak.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to reply anything to that. I just wanted to let you know. And I’d love to help you start a new life somewhere, if that’s really what you want.”

She shook her head. “All I ever wished for was to have a family. A family that loved me and involved me. But not even waiting for twenty-one years made a difference. It’s all still the same.”

He gulped, grabbing her hand. “Let me speak to them, okay? I want them to know that I care about you. And if they’re not willing to change, I’ll help you get out of here. You deserve better.”

Y/N started crying. “I deserve better …”

[tehfabbooty]

Jealous Part 2

The next morning came quickly. You started the day by sneaking to houses on the outskirts of the city to find clothes to disguise yourselves in. While dressing your self in some green and black clothing, gou watched Katara helping Toph with disguising here intrigued by the waterbender's makeup skills.

"....And there. Not too much that you'll stick out to people, but enough to make it more difficult to recognize you,"Katara said as she applied the last touches.

"Thanks, Katara. I would've done it myself, but ya know...,"the blind girl said, grinning.

She was stunning with her hair down like that, you thought in jealousy. Her long black hair went down to her butt, her bangs pinned away to show more of her face. Katara somehow had adjusted Toph's everyday clothes to look a little different and a little more feminine and it made you jealous with how great she looked while you, a waterbender, looked awkward as hell in your earthbender clothing.

Zuko noticed your jealous looks at Toph, so gaining courage, he walked by as if in passing and muttered to you, "You look amazing, Y/N. Like a real earthbender."

You blushed, just now noticing him in his disguise. "T-thank you, Zuko. So do you."

Zuko was dressed in a pretty similar outfit to what he wore in Ba Sing Se, it was just missing the hat he wore to cover his scar. But his hair made up for it, being long enough for partially cover the scar.

His face reddened as well. "Thanks."

You two stood there for a few seconds, awkwardly waiting for the other to say something, but Sokka started talking to the group again.

"All right, everyone dressed and ready? Great. Oh wow, you look great, Toph!"he said, making the earthbender blush, which you have never seen her do before.

"Okay, anyways, we are going to split up in twos. Katara and Y/N, you girls do the shopping for anything useful to us since you're girls, you love shopping -"

Katara punched him in the arm.

"- You didn't let me finish!"Sokka whined, rubbing his arm. "And you're the most responsible and smart with money."

"Aww, thanks Sokka." You walked up and kissed his cheek.

The green-eyed monster flared its head again inside Zuko. It took a little bit of control, but Zuko managed to not huff and glare at Sokka. He just thinned his lips into a thin line.

"Toph, you come with me. We do well with food shopping. Aang and Zuko, you guys search the other areas looking for anything useful to us also, like weapons and other resources. Or information we could use. Also keep a lookout for any Fire Nation soldiers,"Sokka added. "You guys are our best defense. Anyways, we meet back here by evening or sooner. Got it?"

Everyone agreed, then set off for the city of Kuidaore.

......

Around midday, you stopped at a stand to get a drink while Katara scoped a jewelry store out.

"Hey, Y/N, come look at this!"

You paid for your drink before following the water bender inside the store.

"What is it?"you asked before freezing inside the door.

All around the store before you were jewelry pieces from all four nations. You have never seen a store so diverse that it included all nations, especially the Fire Nation. Your jaw dropped as you walked around, amazed.

"Whoa,"you whispered to Katara as you both gaped at Earth Nation jewelry before Katara and you set your eyes on the water bending pieces.

"Oh my God. It's so beautiful,"you said in awe as you stared at a neck choker. It had an opal gemstone, your birth gemstone in the center of the choker necklace. All along the rest of the piece were smaller Opal stones varying in shades of blue along the clear material of the fabric of the choker, making it appear as if only Opals adorned your neck.

"Ooh, that is beautiful,"Katara agreed in a hushed tone.

"May I help you ladies with something?"a strong male voice said behind you.

Gasping in surprise, you and Katara spun around to face a man no older than nineteen staring down at you with a smile on his kind, handsome face.

"Oh, I apologize for scaring you. My name is Lin Chang, and I own this fine establishment,"he boasted, puffing his chest out a little.

You and Katara exchanged glances before giggling a little. "Well, aren't you successful then,"you told the man. "You have gorgeous jewelry, Mr. Chang."

He beamed at you. "Please, call me Lin."

You smiled wider. "Okay, Lin."

He turned his attention back to Katara. "I see you ladies have an eye for our Water Tribe pieces. Would you like to try some on?"

Katara's eyes widened in excitement. "Ooh, yes please! Can I try that one on?"

As Katara tried on a bracelet, you smiled kindly at Lin. "I won't be trying on anything today, Lin. But thank you."

You made your way around the store, checking out the other nation's cultural pieces.

Stopping at the Fire Nation's area, you eyed the beautiful gold and red ornate pieces in wonder. Red had always been your favorite color for some reason.

Finally, you stopped at something that made your heart soar.

There, in a glass case by itself, was a gorgeous Fire Lily hair piece, a piece that looked similar to what the royals would wear in their hair, except it looked exactly like a Fire Lily. Orange, red and gold. You couldn't tear your eyes away from it.

Heart thudding in your chest, you suddenly remembered a conversation you once had with Zuko. How his favorite flower had always been Fire Lily's. Since orange was his favorite color.

Swallowing hard, you looked at the price tag and your eyes widened in shock before your face fell in disappointment. It was way too expensive for you to just drop that kind of money on. But it was so beautiful...

"Hey, Y/N. Find anything interesting?" Katara had suddenly appeared next to you, scaring you.

"Oh, uh. Nothing." You blushed furiously.

"Wait, why are you looking at Fire Nation jewelry? Don't you want to -" She stopped talking before a grin spread across her face. "Wait, are you shopping for your lover boy?"

You gasped in embarrassment. "Katara! He is not my lover boy!"you hissed, face so red it matched the Fire Nation pieces.

She giggled. "Whatever you say."

"He's not! I just like .. The uh, style. I like the jewelry they make. And, I love red." Your eyes darted away from Katara's, looking for an escape.

She giggled again. "Mmm, okay, Y/N." Her eyes landed on the hair piece you were just admiring. "Oh! That is so gorgeous!" She got closer to it, her eyes scanning the details of it. "This would look amazing on you!"

Your eyes widened, shocked. "It would?"

"Of course!"Katara replied. "You should get it!"

"But it's so expensive, Katara. I don't want to spend TOO much money...,"you said worriedly.

She scoffed. "Oh, please. Treat yourself this one time. I think it'll be worth it. And besides...." She got close to your ear. "I doubt he'd be able to resist you with this thing on."

"Katara!"

You both giggled to yourselves, unaware of Lin's eyes watching you.

.....

"Ugh this so boring! Why do girls like this?" Zuko complained as Aang just HAD to scope out every shop and stand.

It was already midday and they barely had seen a quarter of the area they were supposed to scope out, due to Aang wanting to read and learn and gawk at every little thing he found interesting.

"Calm down, Hot man. This is the last item here. Then we can move to the next shop, I swear!"

Aang had stopped to look at an air bending toy, amazed by how the air would keep it spinning without anyone physically touching it.

Zuko sighed. This was going to be a long day. Especially without seeing you. Is it sad Zuko was already missing you and it's only been a couple of hours?

By the time it reached late afternoon, Aang finally stopped checking out every detail, complaining about being tired and hungry and needing a rest. Relieved, Zuko led him to a nice little restaurant.

"So what looks good to you, Zuko? I can't decide!"Aang exclaimed excitedly.

"Oh, uh. I'm not really hungry. I think I'll take a walk while you eat,"he told the young avatar.

"Okay! Don't go too far."

Zuko grunted in response before leaving the small cafe and heading down the street.

Finally, some time to myself, Zuko thought.

As he strolled through the city, giving soft smiles to little kids and nodding at other citizens walking past, he suddenly noticed something intriguing.

Fire Nation colors through one of the windows of a store caught his eye, so he decided to check it out.

Upon entering the store, he realized it was just a jewelry shop.

"Meh,"he said to himself, turning to leave, but he noticed something.

He approached the counter cautiously, his eyes roaming over the beautiful piece of jewelry.

Remembering that you had told him your birthday was in October, his eyes stopped on a gorgeous neck choker covered in small opals around the clear fabric, before his eyes stopped on the Opal in the center.

He pursed his lips, considering.

A few minutes later, he exited the shop, accidentally running into Aang outside.

"Hey! There you are. I told you not to go too far,"Aang said.

"I didn't." Zuko leaned towards Aang's ear and in a low voice said, "But I need your advice again."

.......

Evening was slowly beginning to roll in, and you knew you needed to head back to the rendezvous point, but you and Katara were having too much fun enjoyingthe city, finally living like you weren't fugitives.

Stopping at a small cafe, you two decided to get a cup of tea before heading back to camp.

You told Katara your order before finding a nice table near the wall and the front door so as to keep an eye on anyone passing.

You sat down before closing your eyes and smiling to yourself. It was such an amazing day. Sokka was a genius, you thought to yourself.

Suddenly, a voice started speaking to you that you recognized. It was Lin from his jewelry shop!

"Hey, Y/N, is it? Funny seeing you again!"the boy exclaimed, stopping by your table.

"Oh. Hi, Lin! Nice seeing you too!"you replied with a small smile.

Suddenly Katara appeared. "They gave us to-go culs since they're closing,"Katara told you. "We should head back."

She turned to Lin, realizing his presence. "Oh, hey, Lin!"

"Hello. Would you ladies like me to accompany you back?"he asked politely, his eyes darting between you and Katara, but mainly staying glued to you.

"Oh, uh. That isn't necessary, but thank you!"Katara answered sweetly.

Standing up, you two headed out of the shop.

But Lin followed. He jogged to catch up with you.

"Then I can just walk you to the edge of the city. I figured you girls must be camping nearby. I've never seen you ladies before,"Lin said, smiling.

"Oh, uh, thank you. We appreciate it,"you told him, getting a tad creeped out now.

Meanwhile Zuko and Aang were also just starting to leave to head back to camp.

"Man, today was so fun. I miss days like these!"Aang said sadly.

"Don't worry. You'll get plenty more of these once we end the war,"Zuko assured him.

Aang decided to change subjects, so he started rambling on about something else, but Zuko wasn't listening now. His eyes picked up something. Something he didn't fucking like. At all.

Ahead of them were you and Katara. He was relieved to know you were safe. But there was a man next you. One he didn't recognize. One who was getting too friendly with you.

And you seemed to be enjoying it.

The green-eyed monster inside Zuko reared its head back again, furious. It threatened to break out. Zuko had to clench his fists and bite his lip to keep from blasting that asshole into smithereens.

Aang, who finally drifted off into silence noticing Zuko wasn't listening, finally seen what his firebending friend was glaring at.

"Uh, Zuko -"

"I'm not going to hurt him, Aang. I promise,"he muttered quietly to him.

Finally they reached the outskirts of the city, where Mr. Asshole finally parted ways with you, but not before touching your shoulder and smiling down at you.

Zuko could feel his blood boiling.

This was it. This was where Zuko was going to lose his shit.

Suddenly, a hand touched Zuko's overheated arm. He glared daggers down at Aang for a moment before stopping to take a breath.

"Good. You have controlled your anger. Now that's something Azula definitely can't do,"Aang complimented him.

Zuko chuckled lightly, but he was still furious. How dare this strange man touch HIS girl? The fuck. How dare she LET him touch her.

Ah, well. At least we'll never see that bastard again, Zuko thought to himself smugly.

Back at camp, everyone marveled about their finds. But Zuko couldn't concentrate or join in. His eyes burned into your face. He so badly wanted to just claim you now, in front of everyone. But he knew he had to wait.

But patience was something Zuko of the Fire Nation just did not have.

Standing up, he marched over to you, grabbed your arm and said, "Can we talk?"

You looked up, startled. You've never seen Zuko so mad before. Sure, you've witnessed his rage, but never seen such a wild fire burning in his golden eyes like this. It worried you. Did you do something wrong?

Before you could answer, he led you away anyways.

It was a good ten minutes later, and you wanted to ask where he was taking you, but you didn't dare. You kept quiet.

Finally, he stopped. His grip on your arm didn't loosen.

You stared at the back of his head. "Uh, Zuko, can you let go -"

He spun around to face you, anger and jealousy all over his face. This was kind of hot, you weren't gonna lie.

"Who was he?!"he demanded.

"Uh, who, Zuko?"

"Don't play dumb! That man you were flirting with!"he snapped.

Your eyes widened. "What? Flirting? I wasn't flirting with anyone!"

"Bullshit! I saw the way you looked at him!"

"I wasn't looking at him in any sort of way! Damn, Zuko, what has gotten into you -"

Suddenly he backed you into a tree, both hands slamming to either side of your head, trapping you between the tree and his body.

"Bull. Shit,"he said through gritted teeth.

You rolled your eyes. "He was just a shop owner. We went into his shop earlier to check out his jewelry -"

Zuko's eyes widened a little. Jewelry shop?! Must be that one he went into earlier. . .

Eyes not narrowing, he leaned in a little and whispered, "Yeah? So why was he walking you outside?"

Your face flushed. "Why does it matter?"

"Cause it just does!"

A smile started to appear on your lips. "Are. Are you jealous?"

Zuko stared at you in shock. "N-no! I just ... I just don't trust him! And you shouldn't either!"

"I was safe. I was with Katara, Zuko,"you explained calmly. Though you were not calm.you had goosebumps all up and down your skin, your heart was pounding in your chest at his proximity, and a blush was forming on your cheeks.

"Yeah, well. He could've killed both of you. Or followed you back to us!"he blubbered.

"We could've handled him even if he did!"you shot back.

"How would you know? Two water benders against - what - an earth bender? Or maybe a fire bender!"

You groaned. "I can take care of myself. Even if I somehow died, you still got Katara. Nobody actually needs me -"

His eyes bulged out of his head. "Nobody needs you?? I need you! I've always needed you! I'll ALWAYS need you!"

Before you could reply, he slammed his lips into yours, finally claiming what was his.

Letting the shock subside, you wrapped your arms around his neck, moulding your lips with his.

He shoved his whole body onto you, crushing you against the tree as his tongue invaded your mouth. You moaned at the feeling of his weight on you, and you felt him smile against your lips.

After a few, he pulled away, staring lovingly at your swollen lips. "You are mine. All mine. Nobody else's."

Before you could respond, he pulled you towards him and laid you down on the ground.

"And I'm gonna show you!"he exclaimed.

Suddenly you felt your pants disappear. Seeing that you have gone commando, Zuko groaned in delight before burying his face into your pussy, using his arms to pin your legs and body in place as he ate you like the queen he thought you to be.

"Ahh, fuck! Zuko!" you moaned loudly.

You felt him chuckle against you. "Keep moaning, baby. I want the world to know who is mine and who I belong to,"he told you in a sultry voice.

You groaned. Him talking dirty was SO sexy.

He laughed a small laugh into your crotch. "You like that, don'tcha?"

You watched as his eyes flickered up to meets yours as his tongue darted in and out and played with your clit, making you a moaning, sweaty mess. He loved watching you fall apart for him, and especially the fact HE was the one making you fall apart. Not that douche bag shop owner.

"Mm mm mm, Zuko. Please." You had a strong grip on his hair, guiding him in your pussy and keeping him there.

He glanced up at you again. "Mm what baby?"he murmured before tongue fucking your pussy again.

It was getting too much. After everything, the jealous, his dominance, now this. . . . You needed him inside you. Right. Now.

Suddenly he stopped. He pulled his head back to look at you more clearly.

You groaned in protest.

"Tell me what you want,"Zuko said.

"Zuuuukooo,"you cried. "Please."

"Please what? Tell me what you need."

"I need you inside me! Fuck me Zuko!"you rasped.

You barely got the words out before he was stripping himself, his cock bouncing free. He lifted your legs up before positioning himself and pushing in. No hesitation, no wait for you to stretch. He was taking what was his.

"Ughhhh!"you winced in pain.

"Shut your whore mouth. You were a bad girl, flirting with another man, when all along you knew you only belonged to one man!"Zuko bellowed. "Me!"he shouted as he bottomed himself out.

You cried in pain and pleasure as his cock filled you so good.

It was only a second before he was pounding you into the dirt, his chest crushing yours as he placed his lips by your ear.

"Tell me. Who's girl are you?"

You moaned loudly.

He lifted your ass up so he could spank it. "Say it!"

"Y-y-yours Zuko!"you gasped.

"Damn fucking right. About time you learned that too." He turned his head and started attacking your neck with kisses. Sucking and swirling his tongue all around. He took your ear lobe into his mouth before letting it out with a loud pop, then went back to leaving hickeys everywhere on you.

It was too delicious. You were so close and he was making it so much worse.

His lips found their way back to your ear. "Cum for me, princess. Let me hear you moan my name while I feel your body shake."

Oh fuck. There it goes.

You cummed so hard it finally got to him too. He pulled out right as his cum spilled all over the grass next to you.

After a few minutes of panting and calming down, you both sat up. Finally, he grabbed the back of your head and forced your lips to his for a loving kiss that said everything.

After pulling away, he smiled at you. "I love you so fucking much, Y/N. You don't even know."

"I love you more,"you panted, grinning.

"Oh I don't think so. I got proof."

"What?" You looked at him in confusion as he stood up and pulled his clothes back on. You did the same, waiting for him to answer.

"Close your eyes."

You did as you were told, facing the bright full moon that hung right above both of your heads.

Suddenly you felt something on your neck and before you could say anything, he told you to turn around and open your eyes.

You did, and then gasped.

Zuko was on one knee smiling shyly at you. You looked down to see that he had bought you the opal neck choker from the shop.

"So uh . . . I heard that when you want to, uh. Um," he stuttered, blushing profusely.

Aww, you thought. He's so cute when he turns back into the shy awkward boy even though he just got done being so dominant and jealous with you.

"Will you - Ugh. Fuck it. Fuck what Aang said. Will you marry me??!"he demanded. He stared into your eyes, his full of hope and nervousness and love for you.

Your cheeks felt like they were on fire.

"Yes!!!"you shouted.

You tackled him to the ground, kissing him hard on the lips before standing up and grinning at each other.

"I got a gift for you too. But it's not for you to wear,"you admitted, blushing.

"Oh?"

"Close your eyes."

You pulled the hair piece out before fixing your hair up into a high ponytail before securing it into place at the base of the ponytail, making sure the Fire Lily faced front and center.

"Okay, you can look."

His eyes opened. He looked at you confused for a moment before his eyes caught the hair piece. His mouth dropped open and his face blushed once again.

"I guess this could signify who I belong to -"

You didn't finish as he grabbed your face and kissed you again. Then he peppered your face in kisses before pulling back and staring at it in awe.

"Yes it does signify that you belong to me. But so do these." He tapped a finger on the side of your neck, making your face redden even more.

"To be honest, I think everyone knew already."

"Yeah,"he chuckled. Then his face darkened. "But not that shop owner."

Grinning, you pulled him back into another kiss.

You definitely have to make him jealous more often.

[getitinbusan]

Full Service

 -Namjoon Smut

PAIRING: Namjoon x reader

GENRE: Smut

WARNINGS: Oral M/F, Kind of sort of but not really public sex, Swearing, Intercourse (x reader in my fics is always on birth control with a trusted partner) Long term cheating.

RATING: 18+

WORD COUNT: 2200

SUMMARY: Other than having nothing, Namjoon would be the perfect boyfriend. You need to choose your family and their money or the poetic love of your life. 

Driving through the darkness, you watched for the box of lights that kept the station illuminated to appear. In the distance you could just make them out, they were like a homing beacon in the night, and like a moth you just couldn’t stay away.  It had been a bad day and only Joon could fix it. 

Your tires slowed as you pulled in, the headlights shining into the window alerting him to your arrival. 

Walking out he crossed his arms on your open window and rested his head on top of them.

“Full Service tonight Y/N?” he gave you a dimpled smile.

Turning the ignition off, you climbed out of your large black Range Rover and walked around the vehicle to stand next to him. 

“I don’t know why a tiny girl needs such a big car,” he chuckled while wrapping his arms around you.

“Only the best for my family Joon, if it’s not a status symbol it’s not for us.” You’d repeated your father’s motto so many times it rolled out of your mouth too easily. 

He dropped his arms and began to walk away from you, opting instead to take up a defensive position by the pump.

“So what happened today? What pissed you off so much that you came here looking to slum it with me?”

He was unusually upset at your words, his face turned into a frown and his eyes looked sad. 

“Hey, Joon… what’s going on? I thought we were both cool with this?”

You questioned him but you weren’t sure you wanted an answer. 

“I’m just trying to correlate how my dick is good enough for you but I’m not.”

And there it was. For the past 8 months you’d been showing up here whenever you needed him.  What was he to you? A friend with benefits, an ego boost, an escape? 

“Joon please, you know my situation. I can’t just leave my fiance and disappoint my family. I thought you were okay with helping me let off steam.”

You walked over to him and laid your hand on his shoulder, “You’re the only real thing I have in my life.” 

Sighing, he looped his finger into the waist of your jeans and pulled you close to him, “It’s starting to hurt Y/N.” 

You leaned your head onto his chest and inhaled, the smell of gasoline hung onto his clothes creating a scent memory that made you crave him.

"What should I do Joon? You know how I feel about you but my family would disown me. I’d lose everything."

You looked up at him hoping he could just understand. 

He knew he had nothing to promise you other than his love and his poetry, so he offered the one tangible thing he could.

"I’d take care of you in all the ways he can’t." 

You began to say his name when he cut your words off with his lips. Gripping your hips he pulled you closer.

“I know he can’t fuck you like I can, you wouldn’t be here if he could.”

He gripped your hair and ran his tongue up your neck sending shivers down your spine. Grabbing his hand you pulled him into the building, the bell ringing above the door frantically as you made your way into the store.

Pushing him back against the counter, you fumbled with his belt desperately trying to get it undone.

“Right here?” he asked “Aren’t you afraid someone will see?” 

Rubbing his hardened cock you stopped to look him in the eye and teased, “You’re not getting shy on me now are you Joon?” 

He stopped you, cupping your face. “Y/N, I’m not the one with something to lose. I’ll take you right here in front of the window if it’s what you want.” 

You dropped to your knees and kissed his bulge through his jeans stopping to bite delicately at the tip. A soft “fuck” escaped his mouth, “please baby girl.”

You loved when he begged, nothing got you wetter faster than knowing how much he wanted you. 

Lifting his shirt you moaned at the sight of his pubic trail, your nose against his abdomen licking your way down its path. Popping the button of his denims you looked up at him while slowly working the zipper down. His blue boxers sat low on his hips and you pushed them down just enough to expose his rock hard cock. 

Reaching in you cupped your hand around his balls and rubbed them while he twitched impatiently waiting for your mouth. He looked beautiful with his eyes closed, his smile upturned, and his muscular chest moving with his heavy deep breaths. 

His cock always smelled like soap, and it turned you on thinking about how he must give himself a few gratuitous pumps in the shower, maybe thinking about you. 

Your head was spinning, you needed him, wanted to give him something more. Wrapping your arms around him grabbing his ass, you thrust him towards you. Circling his beautiful firm pink tip with your tongue you teased the bead of precum leaking from his slit. 

“God you taste good,” you let out before plunging him deep into your throat.

The animalistic grunt he let out encouraged you to continue. Wrapping your fingers tightly around his base you held him firm while you pushed and pulled your mouth over his length working him into a moaning mess. 

Suddenly he stopped you, pulling you up into him he swung you around to the back of the counter and pushed you down out of sight.

“Shhh,” he whispered.

You could hear a series of voices approaching. The bell chimed and you were no longer alone.

“Hey Joon, what time are you off tonight? Should we wait around?” 

It was a male voice speaking but hearing others in the background you guessed it was his wild band of housemates.

“No, it’s okay, I think I might be late closing tonight,” he answered, trying to get them to leave. 

You decided to keep going, see how he’d handle a little head under the counter. Your hand pumped his now softening erection while your mouth gave his exposed balls little kitten licks. The frustration on his face as he tried not to surrender to the pleasure you were giving him was humorous.

A deep voice broke through the others, “Is that the famous Y/N’s Range Rover out there?” 

You froze, had he told them about you? 

He stammered trying to come up with an answer. “Yeah, it needs some work so she left it here.”

There was laughter amongst the boys and too many things being said, you strained to hear while keeping pace. 

“You love her”

“You are so whipped Namjoon”

“Are we ever going to meet her? I for one don’t believe she’s real” 

“I told you guys he wasn’t going to break up with her like he said”

“Yeah, I thought you said you were calling it off.” 

You halted your movements in reaction to this information, his dick definitely needed to not be in your mouth anymore.

He glanced down at you on your knees hiding behind the gas station counter. Even with the unflattering fluorescents highlighting the tears glazing over your eyes, you were still the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. 

He felt like an asshole, his head hurt at the thought that this may be the last time he’d see you. He needed to explain.

“Listen guys, the boss has been reviewing our shift tapes and I don’t want to get in trouble for having you hanging around, I’ll just meet up with you later back home.” 

You didn’t see it, but his eyes looked down towards the counter hoping they’d get the hint.

“Oh! Shit, sorry Joon, ahh.. yeah we’ll get going.” The bell chimed and you were alone again.  

He reached his hand out to help you up and pulled you into his arms.

“I’m so fucking sorry Y/N.” 

You couldn’t be mad, how could you blame him? You had a fiance, you were using him for sex, you knew he deserved so much more.

“I guess we had to end it eventually,” you said as a tear fell down your cheek. “Is it because you don’t love me?” 

He shook his head at you, “Without you, there’s no me, you’re the best of me.” 

You threaded your fingers with his and grasped his hand tightly, “I love you Joon.”

Kissing you softly he whispered, “I love you too.“ 

In a desperate last attempt, you tangled your fingers into his hair and pulled him closer to you. Your lips became one as your tongues searched for their counterpart. Lifting you up he placed you down on the customer service counter and moved to stand in between your legs.  

As close as he was, it wasn’t enough.

"Joon I need you inside me.”

It sounded desperate but you didn’t care, the thought of never being with him again was devastating.

He gently caressed your cheek and wiped away a tear that lingered there with his thumb.

“It doesn’t have to be over, but you have to choose, I can’t share you anymore.” 

His hand slid under your skirt and his fingers moved delicately over your panties.

“Don’t talk right now, just let me prove how much I love you.” 

Shifting the fabric to the side, he ran his fingers through your wetness until he was coated enough to slide one into you.

With one finger inside and his thumb drawing circles on your clit he used his other hand to unbutton your blouse.  Pulling down the cup of your bra he exposed your erect nipple and leaned in to circle it with his tongue. He was well aware that combining the two moves affected you in the best way.

He knew your body, your needs, he could make you cum in seconds if he wanted to, but he didn’t want to, not tonight. 

Getting on his knees he grabbed your panties and pulled them down, tossing them aside. Pushing your thighs apart you could feel his warm breath getting closer to where you wanted him the most.

His tongue moved slowly over your clit, circling and sucking as he slid his fingers back in. Taking his time, he languidly enjoyed every drop of excitement he coaxed out of you. 

With your legs shaking, he eased himself away.

“I need you to slow down baby, I want you to cum with me, okay?”

You could only nod in agreement, your head was floating in the clouds incapable of coherent thoughts or words. 

His mouth met yours softly, and you moaned into the kiss. He pulled away and smiled knowing that tasting yourself on his lips turned you on more than it should. 

His stiff cock was still out and he couldn’t take waiting anymore. Moving in to meet your entrance, the counter height lined you up perfectly. He slowly pushed into you and simultaneous sighs escaped you both. 

This was right, he belonged here, how could this be the end? You became a tangle of arms, legs and mouths, not wanting to miss any part of each other.

Reaching the end, climax imminent, he held onto you tightly while he gave his final thrusts and came inside you. 

Neither of you moved. Afraid to break away, the tears rolled down your cheeks. His hand was in your hair and he whispered, “I want to be a part of your page, I want to Interfere in your story, as your lover.” 

He fell out of you and pulled away turning his back. He was zipping himself up and the permanence of it all hit like a ton of bricks.

“Joon, please…” you pleaded.

“I just can’t anymore,” he choked out through his tears. 

“No, listen to me… please…Joon, take me home.”

You placed your hand on his shoulder and he turned back to look at you. 

His eyes were red and his lips were quivering.

“My home?”

You nodded.

“It’s not what you’re used to Y/N, it’s dirty and I live with 6 guys… ”

You rested your forehead against his. “Joon, as long as I’m with you it doesn’t matter. With you, anywhere will be home.”