#I just pray I’ll be able to sleep tonight

[gelsomini]

there’s something about getting kebab on the way home after a tinder date

[st0rmyseas]

I hate my lifeeeee

[froggibus]

Finders, Keepers - slasher!Jason Todd

Pairing: slasher! Jason Todd x f! Reader (reader uses f pronouns & has a pussy)

Genre: smut/NSFW

Word Count: 2k

Summary: as you feel his knife pressing into your skin, you look up at him through teary eyes. “I’ll do anything to live,” you say, but Jason intends to make you deliver on that promise.

CW: (Tagging this as possible noncon because you get held at knifepoint and fuck him so he doesn’t kill you, but eventually get into it) dubcon, maybe noncon? , knifeplay, reader gets held by knifepoint, serial killer! jason todd, stalking/chasing, oral (m! receiving), face fucking, fingering, finger sucking, cervix fucking, size difference, unprotected sex, creampie, kinda yandere themes?

day 2!! we are still going strong lol. absolutely love the idea of Jason Todd being a slasher, I kinda went for a cross between Michael Myers, Ghostface and Jason Voorhees here. anyway, hope you guys enjoy :)

Kinktober Masterlist

You dive and roll behind the marble countertop, covering your mouth to hide your teetering breath. Your ribcage aches with every beat of your heart, the pounding so loud you swear you can hear it echoing. You only pray he doesn’t notice.

Thick bootsteps fill the room, a menacing rhythm of rubber on hardwood. Each step is slow and sturdy as he approaches your hiding spot. He’s playing games with you, the thrill of the hunt almost as good as the kill itself. You only hope that you won’t be his latest victim.

You see the tip of his boot round the corner and suddenly your time has run out. You spring to your feet, catching a glimpse of your terrified features in the shiny red metal of his helmet before sprinting as fast as you can to the back door. You throw the glass door open so hard you swear it cracks, but you don’t have time to worry about property damage. Not tonight.

As soon as your slippers meet the grass, you’re tearing through the lawn and towards the woods. You can hear his thick footsteps behind you, but it doesn’t sound like he’s running. He never runs. The whole time he’s chased you has felt like one big taunt, like he’s getting off on your fear.

You almost sigh in relief when you make it past the property line and into the thick woods. You duck behind a thick oak tree, glancing over your shoulder to see if he’s still there. Your tensed muscles relax when you don’t see him anywhere. You must have lost him.

You wait behind the tree for what feels like hours before you hesitantly crawl out, attempting to find your way out of the forest and back to society. Back to help. 

But it’s dark and the moon is hidden behind clouds, and you must have dropped your phone somewhere in the chase. All of the trees look the same and you can’t seem to remember where you came from. 

Your shoulders slump when you look to the dark path ahead. There’s no way out, at least not until daylight when you’ll be able to see better. But that still leaves six hours of you hiding in the woods from a psycho killer hellbent on sinking his blade into you. 

You cast your eyes down to your bare legs and slippers. You’d been sleeping before this, wearing only your pyjama shorts and a giant t-shirt. Even if you can wait him out until daylight, you’ll freeze to death first.

You turn around and walk straight into a tree. No, not a tree. Horror dons on you as you realize you’ve walked into a six foot wall of muscle and leather. You have no time to react before his arm grabs your waist and holds you against his muscled chest, his blade resting on your throat like a promise.

“P-please!” You cry out, trying to stay perfectly still. The sharp metal is just barely grazing your throat for now, but you know any sudden movement could change that.

He doesn’t answer, but you can hear his breathing through that damned mask. It’s fast and strained, and his chest rises and falls in time with it. You squeeze your eyes shut and try to picture good memories, try to picture that you’re anywhere but here. 

He keeps his strong grip on you, keeps his knife at the base of your neck. He can practically smell your fear, and it’s fucking intoxicating. Your heart is racing, all of your muscles tremble in his arms. He’s been following you for a while now but he never thought you would put up this much of a fight.

God, it’s going to feel so good to take your life.

He starts to press the blade into your neck and you cry out. Not quite a scream, or at least not a scream of terror. It’s more of a strangled whine, but it has him stopping in his tracks.

“Please,” you whine again. “Please don’t, please! I’ll do anything, please.”

He listens to you whimper, the sounds like music to his ears. He can’t count the amount of times you’ve said please, but he keeps his knife off your throat for the time being. He wants to see just how long you’ll beg him not to take your life.

“I mean it! I’ll do anything,” you can barely breathe, every inhale short and strangled. “Say the word! But please, please don’t kill me.”

You can’t tell if he’s listening to you or if what you’re saying even makes sense at this point. All you can focus on is the knife in his hand and the arm around your waist. Your words start to sound strange even to you, the word please losing all of its meaning.

Jason loves the way you squirm in his arms and plead for your life, and fuck, you look so cute doing it. He wants to sink his knife into you, wants to feel your skin break apart at his touch, but he’s starting to think he can split you open a different way. 

He cuts off your pleads by shoving you to your knees on the ground. He twists his knife so that it rests on the back of your neck, the tip of the blade threatening to plunge into you if you don’t do a good job.

You stay perfectly still, looking up at him with teary and confused eyes. Is this it? Is he going to kill you now? You can’t tell. You watch his every move, every tensing of his muscles, just waiting for him to kill you. 

The hand that isn’t holding the knife reaches up to his belt buckle and suddenly you hear the clatter of the metal on the forest floor. You tilt your head in confusion, watching as his thick fingers tug open his zipper and release his cock.

Despite the cold night air, you feel impossibly warm at the sight of his hard length. Does he…is he expecting you to suck it? After all, you did say you would do anything to survive.

When you don’t make a move, he prods the knife into your skin just enough to draw blood. That’s all it takes for you to lean forward and open your mouth, letting his tip glide across your tongue. The taste of salty precum floods your senses.

He puts his other hand on the top of your head, guiding you along his shaft. His cock is so big it stretches your jaw, and you’re sure you’ll be aching tomorrow. Better sore than dead, though. You keep your eyes closed and focus on the task at hand. It’s easy to forget that you’re on your knees in a forest being held at knife point when he has his cock in your mouth. 

You bob up and down, trying to take as much of him into your mouth as possible. He fills you up enough that you have to breathe through your nose and every thought you have is fucked away.

You’re so caught up on his cock that you don’t even realize you’ve started to bounce up and down, grinding your crotch into your leg. You only notice when you grow so wet that you’ve started to smear your own juices onto your skin. You steady your hips, hoping he didn’t notice how your body is reacting to him.

Of course he noticed, though. He can’t take his eyes off you from behind the mask. It’s intoxicating watching your cute little face strain around his big cock while you desperately hump your own leg. You’ve been so good using that pretty mouth, he thinks you deserve a treat.

You don’t protest when he grabs you by your hair and lifts you up, still keeping that blade pressed against the back of your neck. He releases you and lets you stumble forward onto a tree, bracing yourself against your hands. 

You try to keep perfectly still, but gasp when you feel the cool metal of the blade between your legs. He puts one hand on your hip to steady you, and uses the other to cut open the crotch of your pyjama shorts.

A thick, gloved finger slides into the opening of the fabric and starts to stroke your wet clit. You shiver from his touch and tighten your grip on the tree. He slides a finger into your soaking hole. You whine and move your hips back, trying to get him deeper.

He slides another finger inside of you, pumping only a few times before pulling both out. He reaches his hand around and shoves his slick coated fingers into your mouth. You gratefully accept them, sucking your own juices off of the leather.

His cock brushes your entrance and you brace yourself, closing your eyes in anticipation. He slides in slowly, splitting you open on his thick shaft. A moan forces its way past his fingers in your mouth when he bottoms out. He’s so big you can feel him everywhere, his cock pressing into your cervix.

He pulls out and slams back in, his movements making your whole body shift. He pulls his fingers out of your mouth and sets his hand on your hip, using it as momentum to drive you up and down his length. The hand holding the knife rests on your ass, the handle just barely touching you.

His thrusts are brutal. He pushes all the way in every time, before pulling out and slamming back in again. Your stomach aches from how good he’s fucking you, your legs starting to shake from how you’re standing. You were trying to keep the moans in at first, but he’s so big and so deep that you can’t help it. 

You can hear the squelching noise from your own pussy, feel your hot juices try to leak out whenever he pulls away only to be fucked into you again. You’re getting so close, so needy and desperate. You rock your hips back and forth the best you can, trying to meet his thrusts and get him even deeper. 

“I-I’m so close!” You cry out.

Jason hears your cries and lewd moans, feels the way you’re clenching around his cock. It’s almost unthinkable that you were begging for your life previously, and now you’re about to cum around his cock. He knew he made a good choice with you.

“Please,” you whine again. “Please, I need to cum, please! I’ll do anything, please.”

Your begging is like music to his ears, and suddenly he’s lifting up your leg and holding you up by your waist. This new angle lets him go deeper, the tip of his cock grinding against your cervix every time. It only takes a few more thrusts before you’re gushing around him, going limp in his arms.

Jason holds you up and continues fucking into you. You feel so good and tight around his cock, and he’s so close. He practically uses your body like a fleshlight, tossing you around anyway that makes him feel good. It’s not long before he’s cumming inside of you.

He pulls out, watching as his hot cum runs out of your ruined pussy and down your sticky thighs. God, you’re a mess.

As you come down from your high, you suddenly remember the situation you're in. You press yourself against the tree, pulling your knees to your chest. He watches you, staring at you as you cower. A couple tears roll down your cheeks, though you’re not sure if they’re from fear or from pleasure.

Jason leans forwards and slowly wipes them away. Your hair is an absolute mess, your skin all sweaty and sticky, but you look so fucking cute like this. He tilts his head at you and smiles behind the mask.

Yeah, he thinks he’ll keep you.

[sarahisslytherin]

the hour of the wolf.

jon snow x reader

summary: your nightmares of king's landing follow you to castle black. jon does his best to comfort you.

contains: angst, talk of sa, ptsd, crying, hurt/comfort.

a/n: this one's bittersweet, also first jon and official got fic!

word count: 0.7k

Wind howled outside your cabin at Castle Black, the sound not unlike a ragged scream. You had heard screams like it, had heard them leave your own lungs on several occasions over the past years. You squeezed your eyes shut, praying for sleep to drag you away from your thoughts. But in the pitch black of your chamber you saw the face of every man who tried to hurt you, tried to put their hands on you. You squirmed and writhed and howled but they gripped you all the same. It felt real, too real. You choked on a gasp as you shot up in bed, the cold hitting you like a wall of ice. You were covered in only the thin layer of your smallclothes and the furs that blanketed the bed. You would find no rest here, at least not tonight.

You laid on layer after layer, preparing for the day ahead even though it was the middle of the night. But you had to do something, anything but lie there and relive the horrors you experienced in King’s Landing. You tugged on your furs as you left your room, the harsh northern winds paralyzing you momentarily. Your boots thudded against the wooden floorboards as you made your way through the corridors and down to the courtyard. 

There he was, cloaked head to toe in fur. His sable curls ruffled in the wind, snowflakes catching in them as they fell. Your friend from childhood, the first person you thought to run to once you’d escaped the claws of King’s Landing. Jon Snow. How he had held you when you arrived at Castle Black a fortnight ago, your eyes sunken and your skin pale. You had run to him with a fervor you hadn’t felt in years. You had wept onto his shoulder, nestled deep into the furs as he held you like he would never let you go again. And now here he was. Awake, like you, during the hour of the wolf.

“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked, his voice gravelly and laced with concern as he watched you trudge towards him through the snow. You shook your head in response. “I know the feeling”.

You came to stand beside him, observing the snow-covered railings. “Does it ever get easier? Sleeping, living?”

He was quiet for a moment, considering his words. “It does.” he decided. “The wounds heal over time. They become scars. You remember how you got them but they don’t sting the way they once did.”

You prayed he was right, prayed the gods would be merciful with you in a way they hadn’t for so torturously long. “I have tried to be strong, Jon. But I feel I can’t go on anymore. It is all-consuming. I lie awake at night and I see their faces.”

Jon’s whirled in your direction. You hadn’t spoken to him about what you’d suffered just yet, though he was dying to know. “Whose faces?”

Your mouth went dry. “Joffrey, Cersei, Meryn Trant, the executioner. Men who had taken me and tried to have their way with me. They flash before me when the world grows too quiet.”

Jon’s eyes did not leave you as you spoke. “If I had known, I would have put a stop to it.”

“How would you have stopped it?” you snapped, glaring at him in a way you knew deep down he did not deserve. “There was nothing you could do, nothing I could do.”

Jon came up close to you now, a gloved hand coming up to cup your cheek. “You are strong. Six hundred men here and you might be the strongest of us all. Aye, we might be able to cut down our enemies, but none of us would have endured a fraction of what you did. You are as much a warrior as any man here, do you hear me?”

A single tear slid down your cheek, and Jon was quick to wipe it away. “I hear you.”

“If anyone touches you, calls you a name or so much as looks at you a certain way- you come get me, and I’ll take care of it. Understand?” he pleaded with you, and when you looked into those deep brown eyes of his you wanted to cry.

“Thank you, Jon.” you whispered, burying yourself in the crook of his neck as he cupped the back of your head. He shushed your quiet sobs with all the patience in the world, placing a ginger kiss on your temple.

“I love you.” you sighed into his ear. It was the first time you had ever spoken of the sentiment you knew existed between the two of you. And you decided to breathe life into it with words. “I have always loved you.”

“So have I, love.” he choked out as he held you flush against him. “You’re safe now. Try and get some sleep. I'll stay right here. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

You knew you would sleep easier in the hours to come, but for now you just held onto the one thing in your life you knew you could trust.

tagging: @velvetcloxds @oweninadaydream @spxllcxstxr @shemisseshome

[foggyperfectionangel]

You left

Jasper hale x reader

Tw: sad and ed

Summary: after leaving with his family y/n finds out that Jasper as returned to forks.

It’s hard to think that what jasper and I was real when the last word he spoke to you was I don’t love you anymore, that was the day I felt my heart rip in two. When Jasper left it was like he was never there to begin with and everything began going back to how it was before I knew him, I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, I didn’t want to talk to anyone all I ever did these days was lay in bed and stare at the ceiling praying that it was just some bad dream that I could wake up from.

I knew Bella was having a hard time as well but I couldn’t bring myself to visit her because before because I didn’t want another reminder that the Cullens was gone and Jasper the only person able to drag you from the dark place of my own mind. Jasper was the one who got me to eat again and now I don’t even have the energy to cry.

Im sick of being alone in my sadness so I went to see Bella maybe she could cheer me up a little bit she seemed a bit happier since she started spending time with Jacob. Charlie let me into the house he seemed glad to see me again, I walked to Bella’s room when I heard talking from behind the door I thought it was Jacob. I open the door and my heart shatters seeing Edward sitting on the bed with Bella.

‘Your back’ the mumble words are all I could get out before both of them rushes over to me

‘Y/n….’ Bella starts but I cut her off and look and Edward ‘are the others back?’ I ask trying to hide the tears in my eyes.

‘Yes’ that one word feels like my heart is being put through a paper shredder ‘how long’ I look up at Edward tears staining my cheeks.

‘A few weeks’ those words send me over the edge as a walk down stairs as fast as I can needing to get out of there my whole world feels like it’s caving in on me and I can’t handle it. I held on to hope all this time that Jasper still loved me that he was trying to protect me from himself but now he doesn’t want me at all anymore he couldn’t even let me know that he was back.

I rush home and snuggle into my bed tear streaming down my face as I sob feeling worse then I did when Jasper left me.

I wake up to a cold hand running down my cheek, slowly my eyes flutter open and I see pale skin and blonde hair ‘hi darlin’ the smooth southern draw of jaspers words make my heart flutter as tears well in my eyes.

‘Jasper?’ I ask as rise to my feet and stand in front of him.

‘Yes sugar’ he reaches to wipe my tears but before his hand can reach my face again I smack it away as jaspers eyes go wide in shock.

‘You left’ I sob ‘you said you don’t love me’ Jasper pulls me into his arm ‘shhh I’m here now’ i struggle to get out of his grip ignoring his words as I cry.

‘Y/n look at me…. Please darling’ I stop fighting when him and look into his eyes watching as they good wide seeing how thin and pale I’ve become.

‘I love you but it was the only way you would let me go but please y/n give me a second chance’ a sob leaves my mouth as Jasper picks me up in his cold arm and puts me in bed cuddling me.

‘Sugar I need you to listen to me ok’ is firm voice worries me as he stares into my eyes ‘I know you don’t want to eat so we will sleep for tonight and in the morning I’ll go buy all your favourite foods and I’ll show how sorry I am for leaving you y/n I love you’ before I can respond Jasper pulls me into a passionate kiss pouring all of his feelings of sorrow and regret into it as he pulls away he strokes my hair and doesn’t leave my side as I fall back asleep.

[corynation]

OMG NO 😂😂

From what i saw from greys he isnt dereks brother i think ??

Also... Mark slept with dereks sister in the show so i thought it was ok to ask?

Sorry if i didnt make myself clear tho 😂

But she can totally not be dereks sister

Anyway sorry for the confusion

New Beginnings

alex karev x reader

tags : angst, some fluff, uhhh more tags, this is a little everywhere but i hope its okay, not that sad but enough to need a part 2

“Derek? Wha-“

“I need to stay here tonight.” He kept his head down as he shuffled his way through the door, water drops flowing off his hair.

“Is everything okay? Where’s Addison?” The look Derek gave you was almost enough to answer every question that was running through your head. You stood silently as he threw his duffel bag on the couch, his soaked jacket following. He plopped down in the arm chair, palms rubbing his face.

“I’ll get you some hot cocoa to warm up.”

“No don’t I’m fine.”

Your eyebrow raised at his poor attempt in deterring your concern.

“Oh god you look like mom.” Derek chuckled, lighting the heaviness in the room.

“What happened with Addison Derek? Why are you here?”

His face dropped once more almost immediately. The change drawing regret straight out of your core. “I found her sleeping with Sloan.”

“Mark!?” Hearing the most unexpected name come out your stomach churned in a way that made you swear you were about to hurl. The barriers around your emotions all crumbling at once.

“Are we really surprised.” Derek sighed, flattening himself out onto the couch.

“I mean? Yes? No? I don’t.. I mean he’s your best friend?” Surely it wasn’t out of character for Marks sexual.. tendencies to say the least. But still there was a part of you that couldn’t believe he’d sleep with the wife of the man he practically called a brother. Especially after growing so close to him in the past months. You shared everything together and nothing that was said or done could’ve prepared you for this. Your heart ached more then it ever did before, both for Derek but also yourself. Mark was your first, and you had naively convinced yourself he’d be the last. And though you wanted more than anything to curl up in a ball on the floor with Derek and sob your eyes out until the numb feeling that soared through your nerve endings disappeared, Derek didn’t know anything about you and Mark, and you sure as hell weren’t about to have this be the time he finds out. It took more then you thought you had in you to conceal your emotions. Fighting back the familiar sting of tears became a war for the first time, but you stood your ground against it. Sure you and Mark hadn’t taken the time to talk about making things exclusive, but really you didn’t think you needed to. What you felt with Mark was enough to flood your senses full, not able to even consider someone else entering the picture.

And maybe you were stupid to think he felt the same.

It felt futile to hide the burn in your chest, knowing it was evident in your face. But still you tried to mask your feelings, hoping it would be seen as nothing but compassion towards your brother. You’d drag the sun out by your bare hands to bring sunshine after a life of darkness if it meant the best for Derek.

“Yeah well obviously that doesn’t mean much.” The scene of Derek face down on the couch with his arms dangling at weird angles was almost comical enough to bring you out of your anger. In a sad attempt to stifle your laugh, a small giggle escaped your lips. Derek just looked up from his resting spot and gave you the warmest smile you’ve seen from him all night, the picture perfect resemblance of a child.

“Derek I don’t-“ You were cut off mid sentence by the ringing of Dereks phone. He was hesitant to pick it up, most likely praying to himself it wasn’t the two talks of the night.

“Hold that thought I have to take this.” He cleared his throat before answering the phone, his eyebrows stiffening. “Hi Richard, sorry for emailing so late..” Was all you caught as he stepped out of the room.

The anticipation building in you was almost enough to drive you mad. Derek had been on the phone for ten minutes now and you weren’t able to hear any of it. You had began your (what felt like at least) 100th lap around the room, as Derek finally stepped back in. The suspense in the room falling instantly as his demeanor brought nothing but a strange joy.

“Richard Webber from Seattle Grace just called.”

“Okay..?” You sat down on the couch, Derek following.

“He found us both a job, very well pay, I’d be head of neuro, and you’ll be a trauma attending ! It’s perfect! He said he could even throw in a sign on bonus for you for the sudden notice! We start Monday.”

“At Seattle Grace?”

“Well obviously.”

“Derek? Are you insane? Like are you actually going insane because if you are I can understand why.”

“Am I.. Are you going insane? Y/n this is the perfect job opportunity! It’s everything you’ve worked for come on!”

There was a shared silence between the two of you, you each studying the other trying to feel out the mix of emotions you both had been throwing out into the room. Derek looked at you with eyes of an insane man, his lips a curl of typical mischief.

“Derek. This job is in Seattle. Seattle Washington! We live in New York! You can not bring in a life changing job, and move, that I have to do in two days and expect me to jump at it! I know you want to get away from Addison right now but Seattle seriously? Don’t you think that’s taking it a little far?”

“Yes! That’s the point. Come with me or don’t but you’ll sure as hell look idiotic for not.” You let out a sigh at his words, your jaw tensing.

“Derek we’re talking about both of our whole lives right now. Our family is here, our homes, hell our jobs!”

~

“Y/n! welcome to Seattle Grace. I know the offer was a short notice but I appreciate you coming.” Richard Webber, the chief of Seattle Grace, greeted you at the entrance. A great smile plastered across his face as he reached out to shake your hand.

“Of course Richard. Thank you for the offer. I know you wanted me out sooner but like I told Derek, it was insane for me to do the move in two days. So I really do appreciate the exception, it was more than generous of you.” You smiled, accepting the greeting.

“Oh i know it was. But anything for an old friend’s family. And it would be great to have another genius on hand.”

“Old friend?”

“Oh yes, Dr. Shepherd and I have worked on a few cases together in the past. I’ve spent my fair share of time in New York.” Richard spoke as he began to walk through the hospital, his hand reaching behind him to motion for you to follow. “Now I know Derek has been working here for a week now, and could show you around, but I’m going to go ahead and assign you an intern for the day. Someone to show you around and have do all the unnecessary paperwork for you.”

“Oh no Dr. Webber, no need to do that. You’ve already accommodated so much around me. Surely I can find my way around today.”

“Absolutely no need for that Dr. Shepherd. Let me make the day easier for you please.” You smiled at Richard and nodded, fully appreciating the gesture. He nodded and turned around, his finger pointing to a shorter woman across the room at the nurses station.

“Bailey!” The woman whipped her head around, eyebrows raised and an unfazed expression spread on her face. She began walking towards you and Richard, five other doctors following her lead almost immediately. You giggled to yourself as they all looked like a scene of baby ducks following their mom; though these baby ducks did look particularly tired and worn.

“Can you give me one of your children please. I need someone to be with Dr. Shepherd for the day while she settles in. You know like show her around yada yada.”

“Karev go.” Dr. Bailey ordered turning around and beginning to walk back to what she was doing.

“Me? But I’ve got-“ One of the doctors that had been following Bailey began saying, walking backwards to keep up with her in order to plea.

“Karev. GO.”

He stood in the middle of the room, arms up in defeat. You almost felt bad for him until he turned to face you, eyes narrowed and lips pursed as if this was somehow your fault.

“Come on lets get this over with.” He snarled while walking back towards you.

“Hey don’t be pissed at me, I sure as hell didn’t want you to be the one showing me around.” Karev stopped to take a good look at you, almost completely dumbfounded after your response. He scanned your face, either trying to decide who you were to talk to him like that, or the opposite of the spectrum and he was just trying to hide his admiration.

Your grand hospital tour was finally coming to an end after almost two hours. Alex had taken the time to show you each wing, introduce you to each head of department, and even showed you the vending machines that are least likely to scam you. At first he had seemed like a nightmare to be around, almost like a brooding angsty teenager who didn’t like anyone, but after warming up to him (or maybe him warming up to you?) Alex actually seemed more then tolerable. He made you laugh more then you have in awhile. His presence lighting you more than you’ve felt since your first night with Mark, which in all honesty bewildered you more then you imagined. Questioning yourself on how, or why you had become so comfortable around Alex in such little of time.

Honestly he felt like Mark felt. But for some sick reason, that maybe was just a play on your emotions, the man you had just met three hours ago made you feel lighter then Mark had in 20 years. He felt like a flow of fresh rain water after a drought, cleansing you of all toxins and slowly making you new. He was rain and you were the starved flower.

Yet Mark felt like the water saved from the last rain. Still coursing through your veins and settling into your heart and soul. Something that once kept you alive, was once your everything, now something you couldn’t get out of your system without feeling like you were sucked dry, moments away from an inevitable end.

It hadn’t quite struck you how much the Mark situation had hit you before now. Really you hadn’t had time to feel how the situation made you feel. The thought of butterflies returning to you uncovered a deep empty void that was quick to cover your senses.

The sudden wave of emotions hit you hard, but still you tried to remain as unaffected by it as possible. Though you knew you had done quite the shitty job of that after you caught Alex glancing at you with concern from the corner of your eye.

“So,” he coughed, obviously trying to diffuse the odd tension that had began. “What department do you plan to work in after residency?”

“Well actually I’m a trauma attending.”

“Attending? You look younger than me!”

“Well I am 24.” You giggled at the widened eyes of Alex, his jaw practically on the floor.

“24!?”

“Yep! Baby of the family.”

“Baby of the entire hospital! I mean how’d you even get here?”

“Well Dr. Karev that is a long story we could discuss over coffee tomorrow morning.” It was out your mouth before you could even sit to consider it. Alex looked taken aback for a moment, obviously not expecting that just as much as you were.

“Deal.” Alex warmly smiled, his eyes gleaming with something more than before.

okay hii!!! this req is so late im so sorry😭 also this isnt the og post but i cant find that one so I am using this!!! im gonna be honest ive wrote this little by little over the past few months so i really hope its all somewhat cohesive ????? idk atleast readable but im also crossing my fingers that this is okay cause its my first req :)

so without being said i hope you guys enjoyed and i will be making a part two trust 🙏🏻

and listen i know being 24 and being an attending is like damn near impossible but its greys. there was literally a unfazed bazooka in a guys chest.

[kurishiri]

01 . . . happy birthday, alfons! ˗ˏˋ🪞´ˎ˗

— this translation may not be 100% accurate or may contain creative liberties for characterization or narrative flow purposes. if you enjoy, please consider reblogging, but don’t repost or claim these as your own!

— this is a fan translation of alfons’ second birthday story. for full enjoyment, i would recommend you to read his first birthday story and his and elbie’s past records story, but it’s not required!

— cw: smut 👍

——Mirror, mirror on the wall,

What, pray tell, entails the happiest birthday celebration of them all?

A scrumptious cake? A beautiful scene of the night? Or a surprise present? Perhaps, a most sweet, blessed kiss?

If I were able to shower your birthday with wonderful memories to make you happy,

and if you were able to bury that empty expression you sometimes show, with a genuine smile…

…I wonder how much of it would remain in your memory?

Kate: Hey, Alfons, could you clear your schedule a week from today?

Alfons: A week from today, you say? …My, now what might that day be?

Kate: Jeez, don’t tell me you forgot. Your birthday is coming up, isn’t it?

Alfons: My birthday… Ahh! Now that you do mention it, indeed that would be the case.

Alfons clapped his hands together, as though having just realized just now.

Alfons: Do you plan to celebrate it, by any chance?

Kate: Of course! It’s a special day that comes around only once a year, and besides that, we couldn’t really do much for your birthday last year, so…

K: …that’s why, if anyone else invites you to something on that day, please decline. Like last year.

Alfons: Very well, I will do as you say then.

Kate: Great! I plan to have a packed schedule on that day, so you better be prepared!

Alfons: I see your words resemble that of a declaration of war. One that I accept.

A: Well then, I will be waiting most patiently like a good child, yes?

And so, holding onto the promise I made with Alfons, I made plans for his birthday.

However——

The night before his birthday, with a little bit of pleading from him, I couldn’t bring myself to say no, causing me to fall completely into his trap.

Kate: Mn—ahh… plea—sto…hh!

Alfons: Indeed… you can stop if you wish. I don’t have the slightest intention to restrain you here.

A: Go on now, by all means you may let go if you so wish. I won’t chase you down, after all.

(But even if you say to let go…)

I was on top of Alfons, straddling him, where our bodies connected.

I tried to let go by raising my waist, but…

Kate: …ah, mn…!

Just the slightest movement caused me to feel my insides being rubbed, enough for me to feel good,

and I ended up falling back down, the heat inside me reaching ever more deeply than before.

Kate: hh… haa…

Alfons: Dear me, was all your talk about wanting to stop naught but empty words?

Kate: That’s not… ahh…!

Holding my hips, he thrust into me from below,

and the pleasure I had been trying to hold back was forcibly brought out.

Kate: Hngh… I said ‘just a little,’ but this…!

Alfons: Hehe, that should be my line, no?

A: Seeming to want me so, and reluctant to let go, that’s your body, is it not?

Tonight as well, dragged into the waves of pleasure, I drowned in him.

—— The next morning ——

(I overslept…!)

It was the day of Alfons’ birthday, and yet when I awoke, the sun was already high into the sky.

(It’s because we did all those things late into the night…)

Kate: Hey, Alfons, wake up already!

Alfons: …In two hours I will.

Kate: We can’t afford to sleep away two more hours! Come on, let’s get ready quickly.

Putting aside his unreasonable demand to sleep in, I somehow dragged him out of the bed.

(I’ll celebrate so much so that Alfons can have an unforgettable birthday!)

first. next →

full masterlist 🪞🍰 ╱ ko-fi ☕ (30% of proceeds will go to doctors without borders for donations $17↑)

[kamidukki]

[AKNK] Berrien’s Daily Life Memories [BOX vol. 1]

[Note]

Long time no translate, so my skill gets a bit rusty.

The beginning of a day

(Yawns) My eyelids are still heavy… On such mornings, let’s have a cup of simple, plain tea, shall we?

(Inhales) How relaxing… There is something special about drinking tea while watching the sun rise.

Well then, now that I’ve felt refreshed, I have to go get ready to greet the Master.

Today, a new day has begun, hasn’t it? ♪

I want you to get well

Lono-kun, how have you been feeling physically?

[Lono: Oh, Berrien-san… Sorry that I’ve caught a cold.]

It’s fine, please just lie down.

[Lono: S-sorry…]

Do you have an appetite, Lono-kun? The truth is I cut up some oranges for you.

[Lono: Thank you so much. I’ll eat them. …Huh, their shape is…]

Correct. They’re rabbits. Don’t they look cute? I thought it’d make you happy.

[Lono: Happy you said… Ha ha, I’m not a child you know]

(Chuckles) But aren’t you laughing, Lono-kun?

[Lono: Of course, I am. Did you peel them for me, Berrien-san?]

I did♪ Thanks to that I was able to see your smile.

Looks like my efforts paid off♪

For other’s sake

Hmm~ I wonder what I should do for my day off today…

I was thinking about helping others, but…

“Get a proper rest on your day off at the very least!” was they told me instead.

(Chuckles) It seems like I’ve caused everyone concern.

But when I see someone in a trouble, there’s no I way I can just walk away.

[Ammon: Argh~! Cleaning this up is gonna be rough…]

Oh? Just now, I heard Ammon-kun’s voice…

He sounded in need of help. I shall go see him and lend my aid.

(Chuckles) As I thought, working for other’s sake suits my personality better♪

Bedtime routine

(Yawns) Now, let’s get some sleep… I’ve prepared tomorrow’s attire. Put the doll charm here, add the cologne on it… Done.

(Inhales) This scent gives my mind a sense of security, after all.

Tonight too, may I sleep in peace without having a nightmare...

Well then… Good night.

Overcoming fear of bugs

(Sighs) Even I know how pathetic it is... If my fear of bugs remains as is, the Master may think of me as an unreliable butler one day.

I have to get over this fear by any means… And for that reason…

First, I’ll start by familiarising myself with the bug encyclopaedia...

Ugh…! Gh… (heavy breathing)

Uh… it’s more realistic-looking than I thought…

I will stop here for today. Any more than this will probably hinder my works.

Ugh… I pray the bug pictures I saw just now won’t appear in my dream tonight…

On weapon handling

Haa~ today’s training is tough too…

That being said, compared to everyone else, I’ve become more accustomed to handling a weapon.

The first time I held this spear in my hand... Rather than swinging it, I felt like I was the one being swung by it.

…Now, I can handle it well, as though it’s a part of my body.

This must be the result of my daily training.

With this spear, I shall be able to protect the Master when necessity arises.

(Chuckles) Let’s keep on training for a bit more today, shall we?

Beloved Teacup

Ah… How did it come to this… For my beloved teacup to end up broken…

It’s been my favourite for a long time, what a shame…

Now that I think about it, this teacup holds a lot of memories... From the day I finally bought it, having been so taken with it at first sight in the shop... It is also with this teacup that I've tried out several new blends...

We spent teatime together each day...

Today, the time to say farewell has finally come. What a shame…

Goodbye, my teacup of memories…

Thank you for everything…

…

I can’t bear to throw everything away after all. At the very least, I shall keep the pieces.

Peaceful time

Ha~ the weather is great today.

Since it’s time for break, I might as well stroll in the garden.

Fu fu. It looks like Ammon-kun is working hard to take care of the flowers like usual.

On the other side is… Haures-kun, who is giving Lono-kun and the others a training.

Oh? Over there is… Oh my. Lamli-kun seems to be chased off by Nac-kun again.

(Chuckles) It's just the usual, peaceful, scenes of our daily life.

However… Until the angels come, it is a brief moment of peace.

Considering our battles, I value these moments even more.

May this time of peace continue for as long as possible...

Berrien’s Sigil

D-do you want to see the sigil on my body…?

[I want to see it]

…Understood. It’s a little embarrassing, but if that’s what the Master wishes…

Then, I beg your pardon, for I have to take off my tops…

…

Err, well…

If the Master would like to touch it, I also do not mind…?

A smile for you

Berrien Cliane is… a very kind-hearted butler.

Whenever I feel tired, he’d serve me a tea, all while giving me the soft smile of his.

[Berrien: Master, you seem tired. Be it unease or restlessness, I know it’s all difficult in more than one way. Even so... whenever that happens, please think of it this way. ‘Do I remember my grievances from a year ago? Or even ten?’ That’s right… most worries will be forgotten as the time goes. That’s why, Master, please show me your smile. Whenever you do, it brings me a sense of joy.]

[Thank you, Berrien.]

…While saying so, Berrien smiles at me like he always does.

When I'm with Berrien... a smile just naturally comes to me.

Berrien is… a gentle butler, who’s always there for me.

[pokechbi]

Healing Simon (Chapter 2)

Simon "Ghost" Riley x Psychiatrist!femreader

MDNI !!

WC: 2.1k

enjoy lovies <3 I missed you all! pray to the writing gods that I get out of this funk lol

You stared at the email on your laptop, the cursor blinking on the empty reply line. You chew your nail as you think of a reply. You had given your email to Simon to contact you whenever he needed to talk outside of your office, but never expected him to actually use it considering how he was practically forced by Price to attend your sessions. Although something in you knew it wasn’t so forced anymore. It had been a week since your last session, the night before you’d see him again. 

Having a hard time tonight. Can you talk? 

-LSR 

You typed your reply, hitting send without a second thought.

Absolutely, Simon. You have my number :) 

-

Less than a minute later, your phone rang. You let it ring twice before picking it up. 

“Hello?” You say, a slight shake in your voice. You definitely weren’t used to clients calling you personally. Especially this late. 

“Up at this time?” He says smugly. You hear the smirk in his voice. You smile, scratching the skin behind your ear. 

“Couldn’t sleep. What about you?” You reply. 

“Same here. Don’t you have to be up early?” 

You lick your lips, biting back a smile at his concern. His voice gruff, yet gentle and warm in your ears. 

“I’ll be alright, Simon. What’s been on your mind?” 

He takes a pause before speaking. The line is quiet, a stark contrast to your TV running in the background. You grab the remote, muting it. 

“Just need to talk, love. That’s all.” His change of tone has you concerned, realizing you need to distract him. But nothing has you captivated more than his painfully British nickname for you. Love. It flows off his tongue so easily, so sweetly. Feels like sugar running through your veins, sweetening you. 

“I’ve been gardening lately. Probably not the right time, considering how it's almost winter.” You chuckle. You replied on a whim, knowing he probably could not have cared less about your failed gardening experiments. You hear him chuckle on the other end, the sound shocking you as you haven’t heard his genuine laugh in the months he’d been seeing you. 

“What are you growing? Or trying to, at least.” His sarcastic remark makes you smile wider, a small giggle leaving your lips. It was nice, being able to hear how he sounded outside of your office, talking about things that seem small and insignificant. Like a close friend. 

“Well, I’ve managed to sprout a few tomato plants, some green onions too. Those things grow like crazy.” You respond. 

The line goes quiet again. You fill the silence. 

“I’ve got some nice indoor plants too, they’re less complicated to care for, you know?” 

“What kind?” He asks. 

“The easy kind” You reply, the smile evident in your voice. He chuckles. You feel good, knowing you’re helping him. Even if it’s the smallest bit. 

“I can’t keep a plant alive to save my life. Just got no time for it.” He continues with a gentle sigh. You smirk to yourself, imagining Simon overwatering a plant, thinking he was helping it rather than killing it. 

“I can show you a thing or two, if you want?” You ask. You don’t know what came over you, or why you thought he’d want to learn how to care for a plant by his psychiatrist. “I’m no expert, though.” You continue, not wanting to break the moment. 

“I’d like that.” He seems to jump at the opportunity, not regarding the insinuation that he’d need to come to your apartment to do so. You lie down, turning on your side as you stare at the wall ahead of you. 

“Who knows, maybe you’ll become good at it.” You say gently, a hint of hopefulness in your voice, fully knowing Simon was not the type of man to be good at gardening. It couldn’t hurt to try, though. 

“I’m sure with a teacher like you love, I’d be good at anything.” He catches you off guard, your eyes widening and mouth hanging agape. You try to find the words, but he interrupts you. 

“Thank you for taking my call.” He says, his voice sounding distant. “I needed it.”

You take your lip between your teeth, biting back a smile. “Of course, Simon. I’m here for you. Always.” 

“Night, love.” He says, the smirk evident in his voice.

“Goodnight, Simon. See you tomorrow.” You hang up. Your mind races miles a minute, repeating his words in your head. 

With a teacher like you, love, I’d be good at anything. 

So you weren’t the only one feeling it. 

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You sat at your desk, the clock creeping to 2:00PM. Your appointment with Simon was in less than 10 minutes, and you were still strongly feeling the effects of what he said to you last night. 

Am I overthinking this? Is he just being friendly? Is he naturally flirtatious? 

The questions ran through your head and swarmed through your subconscious. There was no possible way he was actually into you. There were plenty of factors at play. You had been the only one picking at his brain for the past six months, the only one who seemed to care enough to know what was going through his head. Was it that? Or was it the fact that you had been the only consistent thing in his life, and it was taking a toll on him? 

You got up, pacing behind your desk as you waited for him. Sure, you were attracted to him. You liked his presence, his strong, unwavering aura. He was a man who was sure of himself, and that was a guaranteed turn on for women who had only managed to attract the wrong types of attention from all the wrong kinds of men. 

And yet, there you were: spraying extra perfume in all the most intimate places. Behind your ears, your upper forearms, your ankles. Today, your dress being shorter than the pencil skirts you usually wore, the v-cut just a tad bit deeper. Your heels just a bit higher and your legs just a smidge more shaved than usual. 

A knock at the door brings you out of your head. You throw your hair behind your shoulders, walking over to the door. You pause for a moment, then swing it open. Simon stands there, in his usual attire. You notice his eyes shift under his balaclava, a glint of something different in him today. You take notice of this, stepping to the side as you let him in. You close the door behind you, directing him to the chair as if he hadn’t been sitting in it every week for months now. You walk to your desk, your strides slow and calculated. 

“I like your dress. What’s the occasion?” He asks suddenly. You turn to him, noticing how his eyes slightly struggle to stay above your chest. You smile to yourself at him noticing your change in attire. 

“No occasion, I just felt like looking nice today, that’s all.” He hums in response, nodding his head slightly. 

“You always look nice.” You chuckle softly. You walk towards the chair across from him, sitting slowly, keeping your eyes on his. You notice his gaze flit to your legs, and back up to your eyes. The boldness of his glances made your heart leap in your chest. 

“Well thank you, Simon. I’m glad you think so.” You fidget with your fingers, keeping eye contact with him. “Do you want to pick up where we left off last week?” You open your notepad and uncap your pen. “What’s on your mind today?” 

“Not letting me forget why I’m here, huh.” He chuckles softly, resting his right ankle on his left knee. Simon was often hard to read. And he knew that. He only expressed what he wanted people to see, and it frustrated you. You were putting some serious elbow grease into picking at his brain, yet he kept his walls impenetrable, letting you in slowly but surely. 

You capped your pen, setting your notepad aside. You looked at him and smiled gently, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. You leaned back in your chair, folding your leg over the other. You had a feeling this day would come, when Simon needed a break from the professional shrink-talk. He needed a friend, one that didn’t constantly remind him of his duties as a soldier. Someone to get away with. One that wasn’t legally obligated to share his thoughts and innermost secrets with his superiors. 

You see a hint of amusement in his eyes as you continue to exchange looks to each other. The silence was growing, but not uncomfortable. He watched as you got up and walked over to the door where your jacket hung. He kept his eyes on you while you put it on, your dress rising slightly as you raised your arms. 

“You like coffee?” You ask, grabbing your purse and opening the door. He chuckles, rising from his seat and following you out. 

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ 

“They’re closed.” Simon says, bending down to read the cafe’s open hours. You peer inside, seeing nothing but chairs on the tables and the lights completely off. 

“Well, shit.” You say, laughing to yourself. He looks down at you, and you swear you see a hint of a smile in his eyes. “What now?” You say shyly, the embarrassment evident on your face. 

“Your offer for the gardening lesson. Does it still stand?” He says. You smile, hearing the smirk in his voice. Your breath catches in your throat, thoughts racing through your head. Surely it would be unprofessional. It was completely forbidden in the psychiatry world to allow a client into your home, much less a client who had unbearable tension with you. It scared you. The thought of being alone with him, in close quarters. What would happen? You’re sure Simon wasn’t stupid. He knew what was at play. The stolen glances, the slight flirting between you two over the months. It was obvious. 

“Of course. We can have coffee at mine instead.” You say, breaking the silence. He nods, following you back to your car. As you walk back down the street, the wind picks up and your hair flies everywhere. You give up on trying to keep it in place, letting it flow wild. The wind blows your dress uncomfortably high, and you feel a breeze hit you in places that shouldn’t be hit. You look back to Simon, noticing how he watches you struggle to keep it down. You smile at him, smiling nervously. How embarrassing. 

You reach your car, pulling your keys from your jacket pocket. Before you could pull the door open, you feel a strong hand wrap around your wrist. His touch on your skin feels comfortably warm, in contrast with the biting cold. You turn, meeting him eye to eye, your lips hanging agape. He takes a step towards you, your chests only inches apart. 

“Thank you. For getting out with me.” He says, the look in his eyes sincere. You stare up at him, looking between his eyes. Oh how badly you wanted to reach up and kiss him. The urge settles deep in your stomach. You place your hand on his bicep, squeezing gently. He looks at your hand and places it over yours. He takes it in his, interlacing your fingers. The warmth from his hand spreads throughout your body, settling in your core. It was strong and big, his grip unwavering and protecting. 

“Anytime, Simon.” You reply, the shake in your voice giving you away completely. He leans down, pressing his forehead to yours. You close your eyes, tightening your hold on his hand and wrapping your other arm around his neck instinctively. 

What the hell has gotten into me? This can’t happen. It feels wrong. He’s my patient, for Christ's sake. But fuck, does it feel so good. He’s so warm. So..big. 

You feel his hand rest on your hip, squeezing slightly. You relax into his touch, his body heat practically melting you. You open your eyes, and take a step back. 

He wastes no time in lifting his mask, and pressing his lips to yours. 

[alimaybankkk]

gut-wrenching

summary: jj begs you to stay at his house to prevent his father from hurting him before a breakdown. when you’re there, you help him understand sympathy. the next morning, jj feels the same sympathy you described and also feels guilt.

warnings: mega mentions of abuse, jj’s shitty dad, MEGA ANGST, a bit of fluff but honestly mostly angst

pairing: jj maybank x kook!fem!reader

as you walked into his house, you regretted agreeing to jj’s protests for you to stay with him for the night. hours earlier, your blonde haired boyfriend had kissed you all over your face trying to convince you to come and sleep with him for the night, and you had eventually agreed.

“would be so nice. ‘m not allowed to come to your house no more because dad doesn’t let me. but i want to.” he’d cried, kissing your nose.

the hot tub bubbles surrounded you and you sighed. “jj, who cares what your dad says? he’s a dick. be a dick back.”

he frowned. “you don’t get it, do you, baby?”

you knit your eyebrows together, and eventually shook your head.

he sighed. “he said he’d break my nose if he heard ‘bout me being on figure eight again.”

you sighed, petting his wet hair. you felt terrible. the feeling was gut-wrenching. “you work there, though, right? at the country club?”

“yeah, i do.” he said, massaging your back. he turned on a jet and let it pound on your back. he knew it had been hurting a lot the past few days, and he’d been doing whatever he could to make you feel better. “he don’t care about me being on figure eight, to be honest. he just is mad ‘m dating the prettiest kook there is.”

you scoffed. “is that so?”

“yes, baby,” he kissed your cheek. “y’know, princess, he wanted me to rob you the other day.”

you gasped. your head felt like it was spinning. “what?”

“i didn’t—i didn’t do it, though, baby.”

“good,” you muttered. he kissed all over your face.

“he only cares that i don’t sleep your house. ‘cuz if i ain’t gonna steal, why go over at all?”

“oh. so he’s fine with you dating me?”

“yeah,” he said. he kissed your shoulder and sat up. “but he’s mad ‘cuz i didn’t rob you.”

“what?”

he chuckled. your heart dropped. you knew what he was about to say. “i haven’t been home in days, ‘cuz i know he plans to hurt me. but if you’re there, he ain’t gonna do it. gotta keep his reputation up, ‘m i right?”

your heart at the bottom of your stomach, your mouth open, and tears filling your eyes, you pulled him close into a hug and kissed the back of his head. “yes, j, you’re right.”

you felt the flutter of his adam’s apple when he let out a sob. he started crying tearless cries, holding onto your body like it was the only thing keeping him alive. “i hate it, i hate it!”

you cried with him, almost feeling the pain he felt. not almost—you did. you felt every bit of it. “i know. i know, j.”

“why won’t he stop?” he cried. you felt his tears coming down his face when they slid onto your back.

“jj, it’s okay. i love you so much. i’m coming over tonight, okay?? i’ll stay with you. i’ll do it. for however long you want me to.” you cried. tears slipped down your face, too.

“i love you. i love you. i love you, so much.” he sobbed. you tilted his body weight down, so you sat down together and you held him in your arms.

* now, you opened the door to jj’s house. it smelt like beer and weed. jj did both, but he never smelt like it. he was always able to clean it up and smell like some sort of tropical paradise or something.

so that way you knew it was luke. luke had contaminated jj’s air. you even heard coughing. but that wasn’t the worst thing you heard. it was definitely the loud music and the yelling. the floorboards creaked as you moved forward, praying jj wasn’t hurt.

music up to full blast, luke telling jj he was nothing but a disappointment, and jj’s cries and yells were the only thing you could hear. and so your breaths grew heavier and louder, faster and more panicked. you stepped into the hallway, watching the fight go down. you stayed quiet.

“SHUT UP!” yelled jj, his voice sounding like nothing but boyish cries. you only wanted to take him into your arms and kiss him until he felt better.

“you’re momma knew about you,” luke said, pointing his finger at jj. “if i woulda known you were gonna be like this, i woulda left with her. maybe then you would have shut your mouth in an orphanage, boy!”

luke went to swing at him, and jj sobbed. before luke could go any further, you cleared your throat.

they turned. jj’s eyes were droopy. it looked like he had no reaction. he just stared at you.

but luke chuckled and turned to you. “well, well, if it ain’t the kook princess!”

“mr. maybank,” you muttered breathlessly.

“you should be ashamed of yourself, girl,” he chuckled. jj got up quickly to protect you, but luke still hadn’t moved. “why would such a rich young lady want to date a bastard like him?”

you bit your lip. “i wouldn’t call him that, mr maybank.”

he bit the toothpick that had been in his mouth. “and why not?”

“your son, mr. maybank, is the sweetest boy i’ve ever met. i would say you raised him well but i’d be lying.”

he looked infuriated. jj shoved you out of the way so you wouldn’t get hurt, but even then luke hesitated.

“go on, now,” said luke. “i don’t wanna hear nothin from you two.”

“yes, sir,” you answered. you made sure jj was on the opposite side of luke as you followed him to his room.

jj immediately collapsed onto the foot of his bed, crying quietly. he didn’t want to anger his dad. besides, he knew that when you left he was going to hurt him anyway. he just didn’t wanna make it worse.

“j?” you said quietly, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. “are you okay?”

“get off of me,” he said quietly. you jerked your hand back quickly and sighed. you stood, grabbing your pillow and setting it next to the one that belonged to jj at the top of the bed.

“j, did he hit you?” you asked in a gentle voice.

he shook his head. “he was gonna. but you saved me. you stopped him. see what i mean? thank you, baby.”

you nodded, really wanting to hold him. but you didn’t want to touch him and scare him. “i didn’t do it just for you, you know?”

he looked up.

“i did it for me, too. every time i see you hurt, i feel your pain, too.”

he gave you a glare that suggested you were pushing it and you shut your mouth. when jj was vulnerable, he was ashamed of himself. he didn’t want to feel any more of the pain, so he shut down anything that might let him feel happy for sympathy.

“jj, you know i care about you, right?” you asked, placing your hand on his. you expected it to jerk away, but he only flinched slightly and sank into your touch.

“i know.”

you nodded, swallowing. “so you have to let me care about you. you need to let me hold you. you got to let me be honest with you.”

“honest, how?”

“j, if i let you get hit out there i honestly would have made him hit me, too. i promise you, jj. even my own injuries hurt less than what i feel knowing you’re hurt. can you understand that?”

he took a deep breath but finally nodded. “thank you.”

“i love you, okay?” you said, crawling closer to him. he nodded and kissed you, sighing right after.

“ ‘m sorry. it’s just, ‘m so scared that ‘m gonna be like him.” jj said. you felt your heart break.

“no,” you said. “you could never be like him. wanna know how i know that?”

he thought for a moment, then he said, “how?”

“because if you could treat someone important to you that way, you would have done it to me already.”

his frown turned into a smile. he sat up and kissed you, taking his time to lay down and cuddle with you after.

“when we have kids, i won’t do nothin’ to them. right?” he asked.

“right. i know you won’t.”

he looked you in the eyes, a glare shining like no other. “can you make sure i won’t?”

“i don’t have to.”

* the entire night had been the best feeling ever. knowing jj was safe and in your arms after waking up every hour to make sure of it relieved you like nothing before. the relief that flooded through you was so great that you almost cried, petting his hair and kissing his head for ten minutes straight before going back to bed. thankfully, he slept soundly through the night without your touch waking him.

jj was still asleep, buried deep in your chest with his arms around you when the sun shone through the windows and onto your eyelids, making them an orangish pink for you to wake up to.

you sighed of happiness, trying your best to wiggle out of bed without waking your sleeping boyfriend.

you creeped into the kitchen, hoping to find something you could cook for jj and have him wake to a good breakfast. you looked through the cabinets and the drawers, but almost everything was filled with beer.

and weed.

you sighed, knowing the beer was luke’s. you were looking through the last drawer when you heard footsteps, immediately regretting the fact that you had woke jj.

“jj, go back to sleep, i’m just gonna find something to eat for you, okay?” you asked, standing. when you stood, you saw that it was not jj, but luke. “oh, um… good morning mr. maybank?”

“i saw you going through my drawers and shit, girl, what do you want?” luke asked, coming closer.

you backed up to the counter, gripping it. “no, sir. i was just looking for something to make jj. he can get hangry if you know him. anyway, if you had other plans i can go back to bed.”

mr. maybank shook his head. “i don’t got no plans. wasn’t plannin on feedin him anyway. ‘sposed to punish him.”

“mr. maybank, sir, he has to eat. he hasn’t eaten in two days.”

“that’s his own fault. maybe he shouldn’t stay away from home for that long.”

you shook your head. “he has the right to eat. he’s starving. i heard hi stomach this morning.”

“you’re on his side?” luke asked, clenching his fists.

“no, sir, i—”

but you were punched. luke punched you over and over again, dropping you to the floor. blood sprayed on the floor and he kicked you in the gut.

you gasped for air but nothing came up. “mr..”

he stomped on your gut, punching you over and over again. there was a puddle of blood on the floor when he reached to punch your nose, but he was stopped.

jj had come in with a plastic foldable chair. “what is wrong with you??” he cried, kicking luke over and over again. first, he hit him with the chair, and then he grabbed a glass of beer from the table and poured it on top of him, smashing the glass right next to his face. he was sobbing, kicking and punching his father.

he drew his fists back, bloody and white. he cried, holding you tight. you could hardly move, but it was enough to drag jj’s foot away from luke, signaling not to fight anymore.

he cried more when he picked you up from the ground and carried you to his room. he sobbed on his bed, not only blood staining his sheets, but now also tears.

you could hardly talk, but it was enough to say, “i’m sorry, jj.”

he cried. “i know what you mean. i feel it. it’s gut-wrenching.”

“huh?”

“the—the feeling. like i feel your pain. but it feels worse.”

you nodded, just looking into his eyes with no emotion but pain. “jj, can we fix this, it… it hurts. am i going to die?”

jj broke at that, punching the wall. he hated luke so much. what kind of monster of a person would do that to someone?

he carried you to the bathroom and placed you on the counter. he lifted your shirt and gave you a tissue for your bloody nose. he disinfected your wound first and then cleaned it with water. you were not bleeding anymore, but he still had to patch you up.

there was another wound on the other side, so he copied the process and tenderly kissed it when he was done. he wet a rag in the sink and cleaned your face off, and soon you looked clean with a few cuts and a black eye, but you were no longer bleeding and you looked beautiful to him. he looked at you with eyes of nothing but love and a tear slipped from his eye. “i’m sorry. so sorry. i know i said i’d be safe here, but i didn’t think about you. well, i did, but i thought you would be safe, too. i’m moving out of here. i don’t care about my dad no more. i’m leaving and i’m moving into the chateau.”

you winced, suddenly feeling the pain once more. “move in with me. my parents love you. and i do too. i love you, jj.”

“i love you, too, pretty girl. i’ll never let this happen to you again.”

—————-——————————————————

a/n: bro. almost cried while writing this for some reason?? lots of angst.

part two here!

[dw19791967]

That Type of Girl Part 4

Pairing: Dean x reader (Eventual), Sam x reader (Platonic)

Warnings: language, unrequited love, angst, mentions of torture, mentions of self-hate, fluff.

This is the fourth fic I have ever written, all mistakes are my own. Please be gentle on me!

____________________________

Dean's POV:

“Where the hell is she Sam?” I was pissed. Why the hell would she open the door without us being here.

“I’m not sure man, I’m looking. I promise we will find her.” Sam was searching on his laptop.

“I think it’s that Rick dude she mentioned, I mean she knew something was up with him. I don’t understand why she would be so stupid.” I can’t lose her. She is my best friend.

“Looks like there are two possibilities for where he would take her, he must have smashed her phone because I can’t pick up a GPS signal.” Sam looked at me.

“Where was the last location ping?” I looked at Sam’s screen.

“There, it’s that one.” I pointed to the closet location. Close to where her phone pinged. “Let’s go get my girl.”

_________________

Y/N's POV:

God, I can’t wait for the ass chewing the boys are gonna give me. Anything is better than listening to Rick whine and groan about how much he hates women. It’s been about five hours since he took me. He has sliced me more than a Christmas ham. I guess better me than some other helpless woman.

“Wondering when your saviors will come, sweet Y/N?” Rick started working his way towards me again.

“Actually I was wondering something about you. Why is it you pick women to prey on, hmm? Worried a big strong man would be able to see through your BS?” I smirked at Rick.

“You know you are one annoying bitch, Jesus how do the Winchesters put up with you?” 

Rick smacked me across the face. Hard enough to make my mouth bleed.

“What can I say, I am a joy to be around.” I pray the boys are close.

Rick starts to come close to my face. “As soon as your big giants get here, we can really get this party started. That is if they come to save your fatass.” 

I spit blood in his face. “Aw thank you for the compliment, I actually don’t think I have much of an ass but if you do, well it must be true.” I smiled at him.

“You bitch, you are so dead!” Rick lunged towards me. I am exhausted, I can’t even keep my eyes open at this point. Guess this is the end.

“Hey asshole!” Dean rushed into the building.

“Well, looky here sweet Y/N. It looks like they came to save you after all.” Rick walked towards Dean.

“You know, I have been more annoyed in the last five hours than I think I have been my whole life. I give you props for not kicking her to the curb. Why don’t I do you and your idiot brother a favor and kill her now?” 

“Listen, Rick is it? I don’t know what the hell your problem is and frankly I don’t give a damn. What do you say I do you a favor and kill you quickly?”

Rick glared at Dean.

“Well, suit yourself I guess. We will do this the hard way.” Dean smirked.

_______________________

The next thing I know I am waking up in the backseat of baby. 

“Hey Y/N we are almost back to the motel, then we will get you patched up alright?” Sam looked over the front seat at me.

I turned over and closed my eyes, sleep seemed like the best idea right now.

I felt the car park. I opened my eyes to see the driver door slam. Great Dean’s pissed, just what I need tonight.

“He’s pissed right?” I asked Sam.

“He was just worried about you, we both were Y/N.” Sam pats my hand.

Once inside the room I sat down at the table. Dean glared at me from his side of the bed.

“I will let Dean patch you up, I’ll go grab us something to eat. Burgers ok?” Sam looked at me.

“Yeah that is fine, thanks Sam.” I gave him a slight smile to show that I am ok.

With Sam gone the room filled with awkward silence. I hate having Dean mad at me.

“You know it was incredibly stupid for you to open the door without back up right?” Dean moved towards me.

“I know Dean.” I sighed. I hope he makes this ass chewing fast.

“What would have happened if me and Sammy didn’t make it there in time Y/N? Do you know how that would have mad us feel?!” Dean is radiating anger. He was pacing the room.

“I know Dean, I’m sorry I really am. I thought it was you or Sammy at the door. I promise I wouldn’t have opened it, if I knew it was him.” I started to cry. If I cried it meant one of three things. I was really really happy, I was angry, or I was sad. It is a mixture of two and three right now.

“I know I am an idiot and I should have been more careful, I promise I will try to be better.” I looked at Dean with tears in my eyes. I hated disappointing him.

Dean sighed. “Look sweetheart, I care about you a lot, I just don’t want to think about if something bad happened to you and I wasn’t there to stop it.”

“I know Dean, I am really freaking sorry.” I moved my leg towards him and winched. Damn the cuts are starting to hurt.

“How about you take a shower and I will get you stitched up?” Dean moved to help me stand.

“Ok.” I made my way slowly to the bathroom. Once inside I started the shower. Dean made sure I made it ok. 

“I’m gonna set the stuff up, I’ll lay your pj’s on the sink for you. Holler if you need me.” Dean looked at me. His eyes can usually tell me what he is thinking. Right now, it looks like they are full of worry.

“I will, promise.” While in the shower, I mentally prepare myself for Dean to stitch me up. I usually liked Sam doing it because I knew he wouldn’t judge my body and not that I think Dean will, I just don’t want him to see the whole me. Of course Dean had seen bits and pieces but not the whole thing and definitely not a lot at once. Dear Lord, please let this get over quickly.

I made my way out of the bathroom. Dean had left my favorite oversized shirt and pair of my boy short underwear on the sink for me. Ever since we decided to split laundry duty this is something I have gotten to be ok with him seeing. I had my hair up in a bun. I needed it out of my face.

“Where are the cuts at?” Dean had me sit down at the table. 

“Mainly my thighs, hips, and chest.” I sighed. This is worse than Rick torturing me. 

“Ok, let’s start with your legs first hmm?” Dean got on his knees to work. “Tell me if I’m hurting you.”

The needle went through my skin. This was nothing compared to the damage Rick had already done.

“You ok?” He looked at me with concern in his eyes.

“I’m fine.” I gave him a small smile.

“You know your freakishly strong pain tolerance is coming in handy right about now huh?” He grinned.

“Yeah I know. I’m so blessed.” I giggled.

He worked on my thighs and hips for about twenty minutes. I looked at the fresh stitches across both of my legs. I am really gonna impress the boys now huh.

“Ok, now for your chest. How do you want to do this?” He looked at me again, eyes full of worry.

I knew he was worried about making me uncomfortable. But honestly I am so exhausted at this point I just want to get this over with. He has already seen dozens of stretch marks and cellulite across my thighs. 

“How about I take my shirt off and cover the girls and you can stitch?” I looked at him. I am praying he will not be grossed out. This is a line I thought we would never have to cross.

“Sounds good sweetheart, I’ll turn around while you do what you need to do.” He is a gentleman after all.

I covered my boobs and stomach the best I could. “Ok, ready.” I closed my eyes.

Dean got to work. These ones didn’t take as long. Thankfully Rick was interrupted before he could keep going. 

“Alright, all done.” He finished covering the big cut with a bandage. 

I opened my eyes. “Thanks Dean.” 

“No problem sweetheart.” He winked at me.

Damn him why does he always do that.

I blushed.

“You know I love you right Y/N?” Dean moved to put the supplies away.

“Of course Dean, I love you too.” I was still holding my shirt over my boobs and stomach. 

“I don’t know what all Rick said to you but I want you to know I think you are beautiful and perfect the way you are.” Dean looked at me, except this time his eyes lacked worry. No this time, it almost looked like he was happy.

“Well thank you.” I blushed again. Why is he saying these things? Surely he is bullshiting me.

“I know you may not believe me and that’s ok. But I really do mean it.” Dean made his way to me.

“Dean, I appreciate you saying it. Rick did make some comments but that’s ok, he’s a demon and I don’t really give a ratsass what he thinks and now he’s dead.” I looked at him.

“I know you don’t always think highly of yourself, but you are an amazing person. I don’t know what I would do without you.” Dean brushed his hand against my shoulder. 

What is happening? Why is he being all mushy? I am so confused. 

“I know Dean, I feel the same way.” I looked at him again.

“No, I’m not sure if you do sweetheart. You see, the thing is, I’m pretty sure I am in love with you.” Dean looked me in the eyes now.

Oh shit, what in the hell is happening?!

________________________________

Tag List:

@hazel-eye-coffee-shop-girl-blog

@deanspinsterwitchs-readinglist

@pandasrdbest2341

[bullet-clubs-bitch]

I would love a BCC smut headcannon fic! I’ll leave it up to you! Not many people write about all of them. Thank you! 😊

Fine Print

An: This started out as some form of head cannons and turned out to whatever this is. I honestly don't know what this is.

Blackpool Combat club X Fem reader

Main Masterlist

Word count: 835

Summary: When Regal betrayed the BCC they were in search of a new leader and somehow you fit the part. You should have read the fine print

When Regal turned on the BBC months ago I didn’t know what to expect. Sure we all knew it would happen at some point but did that point need to be right now? I had the pleasure of being ringside for the match against Mox and MJF, I saw firsthand the look of betrayal on Jon’s face once he realized what had happened. 

The next few weeks were a bit of a daze, originally I was just being used as a distraction, as bait for this feud with Max. I honestly didn’t mind it, I still hated him for what happened during our days in the pinnacle so when Regal came to me with the idea I had to accept. Now that he’s gone the BCC needed a leader. I would assume the torch would be passed to Mox or Danielson but me? What did they see in me? Why did they want me to take over their sacred club?

Those next weeks as the new leader of the BCC went well, almost too well. We would travel and room together since that’s what factions do but I always felt like there was something else. The way the boys would exchange looks between the other hoping I didn’t realize but I always did. The way they would get jealous when other male talent approached me backstage. I almost felt like I was pray and they were predators waiting to find the right moment to attack. 

Tonight I had a match on Dynamite against Hikaru Shida, of course the boys needed to be ringside for my match. When I arrived at the arena I could feel everyone’s eyes on me, almost like I did something wrong. Just then Shida came up to me. 

“Hey Y/n!” Shida said, approaching me with a big smile 

“Hi Shida, you ready for tonight?” I asked 

“I’m ready to kick your ass” She said laughing “But I came to give you a bit of a heads up” 

Heads up? Why would I need a heads up?

“I think your little club is mad at you?” Shida said to me before a “Good luck”, with that she left

I stood in the middle of the entrance frozen in fear. What did I do? Everyone knows not to piss off the blackpool combat club. Trying to prepare myself for the absolute worst I walked down a few halls until I made it to our private locker room. I knocked on the door, no response, so I knocked again, still nothing. I slowly opened the door and realized it was pitch black in the room, just then I felt someone grab my arm and pull me inside. 

I tried to move, make a sound, but I couldn't. Whoever grabbed me had a tight grab on my wrists from behind with one hand, the other covering my mouth. Still I tried to escape but then I felt it and I realized exactly what was going on. I could feel the hard erection pressed against my ass. My body now was able to relax, just for a moment. Then that’s when I realized that it was Mox who held me, at least I thought it was, I was still in the dark. 

Just then the mystery man let go of me and the bright lights turned on, revealing the entire blackpool combat club. 

“Where were you yesterday?” Mox asked as he slowly approached me, now face to face 

I didn’t know how to respond 

“I’m asking you a question: doll face, where were you?” Mox asked again, voice louder this time 

“Home?” was all I could manage to stay

“That’s just not good enough, you see we don’t appreciate you not joining us yesterday” Danielson said “The BCC we eat, we sleep, we train together. You know this. So why weren't you here yesterday?”

I didn’t know what to say, truthfully I wanted to travel to the show alone today. I was starting to grow a bit uncomfortable at times, I swear Yuta was watching me in the shower the other day. 

“What’s the matter? Cat got ya tongue?” Mox said as he grabbed me once again, pressing my ass against the bulge in his jeans. “You feel that Y/n? This is what you do to me, I’m pretty sure you do this to all of us. I’m going to say this once baby so you better listen. You may be the leader of this club but I will tell you what to do. Part of your job Y/n, will be to help me out with this little problem I have here alright?” 

Just then, Mox gave the others a nod to which Yuta, Claudio and Bryan left the room leaving me and Mox alone. 

What have I gotten myself into?

[ieatsaltychildren]

REPLACED

Obey me x replaced!reader

I did use she/her pronouns in this. Theres not a ton of dialogue and was honestly part of a vent💀 Remember that I’m in no way trying to romanticize any of this.

TW!- mentions of an eating disorder, suicide, overdose, death, probs OOC, angst no comfort.

Some songs I listened to while writing this- Rock Bottom-Eminem, The way I am-Eminem, 4 morant- doja cat, Alone-doja cat, 25 to life-eminem. Literally these on repeat😭

Life is hard. We all know this, but why did this have to happen? Why did she have to come along and take them away? Why did they choose to leave me?

I shouldn’t have trusted them. The one time i let my guard down and this happens. Mila, the bitch who took them away. I was nice to her, i tried to be her friend, i wanted to get to know her but apparently she only wanted to see my downfall and the brothers kneeling for her.

I don’t like talking about when she first came, but for the backstory i will. Diavolo thought it would be a good idea to invite another human to be an exchange student. At first i was overjoyed. I wanted to have another human girl to talk to and relate to, but once she showed up everything went wrong. She started framing me for shit she did, and i just stood there and took the scolding i got.

Eventually all the brothers just went to her and ignored me. They only talk to me if they need something done or they yell at me. I still always try to get them to love me, yet i always fail.

She even was able to get the angels, royals, Solomon, mephisto, and even Thirteen and Raphael on her side. Everyone left me. Every day is just a repeat. Wake up late most days, have lucifer remind me of how much of a failure i am, skip breakfast, go to classes, probably skip lunch, go to classes, go back to hol, force myself to eat dinner, eat dinner in my room, and sleep. Every day. Theres nothing to be excited about when i wake up anymore. No more hanging out with mammon, no more being levis player two, no more sleepovers with asmodeus. The only one who remotely cared about me was barbatos. Maybe he could help me get back to the human world but it wouldn’t be any better.

What hurt most was mammon, my first man leaving me. He swore. He fucking swore that he would always love me yet he still left me. We weren’t even dating so why does it have to hurt so much.

Even fucking beelzebub. He always acts so sweet but he left to. They all did. Maybe its good mila came along. She showed me that they weren’t trustworthy. It still hurts though.

I just want it all to be over with. If liliths not gonna kill me then I’ll do it myself.

My lifes been shit anyways. It never got better. It sucks to always wake up stressed. It sucks to always be hoping and praying that ill just die. Mila coming along and replacing me just added onto it.

I have attempted at my life multiple times since she came. Never has it worked. But maybe that will change soon. Maybe that will change tonight. I wonder how long it would take them to even notice, they didn’t notice my failed attempts so why would they notice a successful one. I wonder how they would react, the royals, angels, every single one of them. I already know mila would be happy. Maybe they would feel the same.

The laughter of the brothers and mila snaps me out of my daze. It reminds me of the short lived happiness i once had. The happiness i wish i still had. But soon it would all be over. Once the pills fully kick in I’ll finally be happy.

I have tried overdosing before. It didn’t work last time but it should work now. I have a good feeling. Or maybe thats just the drugs. I didn’t even write a goodbye note to them yet. It’s fine though.

Hearing their laughter in my final moments hurt but felt so good at the same time. It’s kicking in. It’s finally working. Ill be free.

My vision got blurry. I could only hear a distorted version of their voices that eventually faded out. Then it all went black. Its the end

Im free

———————————————————————

It had been a few days since you died. No one knew until 4 days had passed. Mammon needed to borrow money from you for diavolo knows what.

He knocked on your door “Y/nnn, open up I need to ask ya somethin”

No response

He knocked again and yelled “y/n?”

No response

So he went to tell lucifer. I don’t know if he intended on telling on you or was concerned. Probably the first option.

“Lucifer, y/n won’t open her door”

“What do you want me to do about it?” Lucifer sighed sick of his brother’s shit.

“I just need to get some grimm from her”

“Just go in. She’s probably just sleeping”

“Fine then” mammon replied starting to walk out the door.

As he approached your door he got a certain nervous feeling. He just ignored it, nothing bad could happen, right? Wrong.

As soon as he opened your door he saw you dead on the floor, drug bottle in hand.

He stood there frozen. How could this happen?? He was supposed to protect you. He was your first man. He hopes you were just passed out but deep down he knew.

He ended up calling for his brothers. This is the one time they really actually looked at you in months, hell almost a year. Mila was happy, as expected but she covered it up with tears.

Soon solomon, the royals, and angels showed up. Raphael, thirteen, and mephisto even showed up.

They all realized how shitty they treated you. They realized how badly they fucked up.

———————————————————————

I might honestly make another ending where y/n keeps pushing and ends up fucking mila up or goes back to the human world and tries to get her shit straight. Im not sure tho. Might do how they would react too y/n dying AND where you went after you died. I wrote this for 3 hours straight😭😭😭 my hands are cramping

MAYBE THE END

[angel2el]

DONE WITH YOU (ELVIS PRESLEY) -- PART ONE

Hello everyone! Part one is now out! For those who don't know, this is my first ever series about Elvis leaving the Colonel. Thanks so much to my lovely editor @landlockedmermaid77 for all of her help and lovely friendship.

Please leave a comment or ask letting me know what you think!

-----

Jerry wakes up at 2:30am to a slow, lazy knock on his door.  He lifts his head up slowly.  He’s exhausted from the previous night of partying.  Slowly, he makes his way out of bed toward his hotel room’s door.  Another knock.

Groggily, he opens the door.  Elvis is standing, shivering, in nothing but boxers and a white night shirt with his arms crossed across his chest, eyes down.

“E..” Jerry starts.  Elvis takes in a breath and puts a hand on his brow.

“Jerry…Jerry, I can’t do this anymore.”  

Jerry opens the door and beckons for Elvis to come in.

“What happened?”  Jerry puts a hand on Elvis’s back.  It’s burning hot and covered in cold sweat.  Elvis groggily makes his way to the couch and sits down.

“The…the colonel’s got me workin’ like a god damn dog, Jerry,” Elvis mumbles exhaustedly.  Jerry sits next to him and rubs his back gently.

“Have you been sick?” Jerry asks.  “You’re burning like a damn piece of coal…”

“I threw up…I don’t know how many times.  I been up all night, Jerry.  Can’t get an ounce of sleep.”  Elvis sniffles and wipes his eyes.  There’s eyeliner smudged around them.  Poor thing couldn’t even get his makeup off, Jerry thinks.

“You need rest, Elvis.  You got two shows tomorrow.  You sleep in my bed tonight, alright?”  He turns to look at his bed and only turns around when he hears a sob.

Elvis shakes his head as his whole body shakes with a sob.  

“I can’t Jerry…I-I can’t do another show…I done hundreds.  Thousands. Thousands and thousands and all that…all that fat bastard wants is more.  Suckin’ my blood like a damn vampire.”

“I…I don’t like him.  You know that, E.  But think about the fans.”

“All I think about is the fans.  All the Colonel ever thinks about is himself.  Wh-why can’t nobody think about me for once?”  Elvis puts his head in his hands.

“I’m sorry, E.  I wish I could do more.  Just come to my bed and try to get a little rest.”

“I don’t wanna go to sleep if it means I have to wake up,” Elvis sobs.

“Don’t you say that.  Don’t say that, Elvis.  You’ll feel better in the morning.  Have you called ‘Cilla?”

“Twice.”

“She hasn’t picked up?  She’s just sleeping, Elvis.  You need to get to bed.”  Jerry helps Elvis up and guides him toward the bed, easing him onto it.

“I can’t sleep without my pills, Jerry.  Go get my pills.”

“You didn’t take em?”

“I tried.  They all came right back up.” Elvis turns onto his side and curls up a little.

Jerry places a hand on Elvis’s forehead.  “You in any pain?”

“I got no clue.  My whole body just feels numb.”

“It’s those damn pills, Elvis.  You’re killing yourself with those.”

“You act like I got a choice, Jerry.  I can’t do anything without ‘em.”

“You can sleep right now.  That’s all I need from you.”

“Bring me another blanket.”

“You’re burning.  I can’t do that.  You know it.”

Jerry sits down on the bed next to Elvis and brushes the hair out of his face.  “Close your eyes.  I’ll get you some fever medicine in the morning.”

Jerry turns on the lamp and opens a book on the other side of the bed.  In the light, Elvis looks worse.  His face is white as a sheet and eyes red with tears.  Jerry can only pray he’s well enough to perform in the morning.

Sleep comes to Elvis quicker than he thought it would,but it doesn’t last long.  He’s up only an hour later to a pain in his stomach and rising nausea.  He shoots up.  Jerry jolts up next to him, having fallen asleep as well.

Elvis stumbles to the bathroom and loses all the rest of the water he’d been able to get down before collapsing by the toilet.  Jerry rushes into the bathroom, rubbing Elvis’ back.

“You’re sick as a dog, Elvis…” Jerry puts a hand to the other man’s forehead.

Elvis whimpers slightly at the touch,“I need my…my pills, Jerry.”

“I can’t do that for you.  You got two shows in the daytime.  Let’s get back to bed.”

Elvis silently shakes with a sob, a tear running down his cheek.  Jerry brushes the hair out of his face and puts a hand on his friend’s shoulder.  “Don’t cry, Elvis.  You’re gonna be alright,” he attempts to comfort him.

“I’m done with that Colonel,” Elvis manages to get out.

“We can talk to him in the mornin’ about that.  D’you think you can go back to bed or are you in too much pain?”

Elvis wipes his eyes.  “I can sleep,” he whispers.  Jerry grabs him by the sides and helps him up and into bed.  

“You can have the whole bed to yourself again, E.  You can even have the whole suite to yourself if you want me out of here,” Jerry says.  Elvis nods.

“I want you to stay.  Just stay in that chair and make sure the Colonel don’t come in here,” Elvis says, pulling the covers over himself.  Jerry nods.

–

Jerry isn’t sure how much time passes before the phone is ringing and sunlight is pouring through the window.  Elvis is curled up on his side, shaking like a leaf but still asleep.  Jerry, too, had fallen asleep.  He goes over to the phone and picks it up.

“Yes?” Jerry says quietly.

“Jerry?”

“‘Cilla?”

“Yeah, it’s me.  I heard the phone ringing last night but I didn’t get up.  Thought it might be Elvis, but when I called his hotel room first thing this morning, he didn’t pick up.  Is everything ok?” Priscilla sounds worried.

“Something’s wrong with him, ‘Cilla.”

“What do you mean?” her voice is a little frantic now.

“He’s got a fever, and he’s apparently been throwin’ up all night.”

“All night?  Should I fly out and see him?” Priscilla asks.

“Maybe.  I think he needs someone right now.” Jerry glances at Elvis.  He’s pale and has his arms crossed over his chest.

“Is he in pain?” Priscilla asks.

“I’m not sure.  Those pills are keepin’ him numb, far as I know.  But I’m not letting him take any more.”

“Good.  Those pills are killing him, Jerry,” Priscilla agrees.  Suddenly, Elvis stirs, and Jerry turns to look at him.  He weakly starts to sit up.

“He’s up now, ‘Cilla…”

“Can I talk to him?”

Jerry nods,  “Yeah.  Elvis, come over here.  ‘Cilla’s on the phone and she wants to talk to you.”

“‘Cilla?” Elvis slurs out.  

“Yeah.  She wants to talk to you.  She’s worried,” he says.

“I…I can’t get out of bed,” Elvis says, looking down at his legs.

“He says he can’t get out of bed.”

“I’m flyin’ out,” Priscilla says,  “Tell him I’ll be there by tonight at 9pm, will you?”

“Of course,”  Jerry says,  “Bye now.”

“Bye bye.”

Jerry hangs up the phone and turns to Elvis,  “She’s gonna be here by 9 tonight, E.”

“Oh…okay,” Elvis says drowsily.

“You in any pain?”  Jerry asks and Elvis nods.

“My stomach is killin’ me.  And…and my head.  And my…my right ankle.  Did I tell you I rolled it on my way to your room?”

“No, you didn’t,”  Jerry approaches the bed and lifts the covers off to look at Elvis’s ankle.  It’s bruised and slightly swollen.  He winces.

“It hurts like hell, Jerry,” Elvis says.  

“You can wear a brace while you perform today.  You got a matinee show at 12 and another show at 9, ok?”

“I…I can’t,” Elvis says softly.

“You have to,” Jerry says solemnly.  Suddenly, there’s a knock at the door.

Jerry rushes over to open it.  It’s the Colonel.  He barges into the room and sees Elvis on the bed, in pain, pale, shaking.

“Mr. Presley, what seems to be the issue here?  You should already be in the dressing room getting ready,” the Colonel scolds.

“He’s not feeling well, Colonel.  He’s been sick all night, feverish, throwing up…there’s something wrong with him,” Jerry explains.  Elvis looks down to avoid making eye contact with the Colonel. 

“Dr. Nick will give him all the necessary medication he needs to be able to perform today,” the Colonel says, glaring at Elvis,  “Isn’t that right, Mr. Presley?”

“...yessir.  That’s right,” Elvis mumbles exhaustedly.  

Elvis shifts in bed.

“He needs something to settle his stomach.  And some pain medication for his ankle.  That’s all, though,” Jerry says firmly, “All these pills you’re pumping him full of are doing nothing but hurting him.  I’ll send somebody to get ‘em for you, Elvis.”

The Colonel frowns.  

“Are you his manager now, Jerry?  As far as I know, I am the one who makes the calls as to what goes in his body.”

Jerry stands up, walking closer to the Colonel.  

“I ain’t his manager.  I’m just a concerned citizen, Mr. Parker, and I’ll be taking care of him in between the shows.”

The Colonel is taken aback, but grits his teeth.  

“I am his manager, Mr. Schilling.  I will decide what happens to him.”

“Actually, I think we should let him decide,” Jerry says, turning to Elvis.  He’s still looking down at his lap.  

“Elvis, would you rather have me or the Colonel decide what happens to you from here on out?”

“....” Elvis swallows.  

“You,” he whispers.

The Colonel frowns.  

“Very well, then.  Mr. Schilling will prepare you for the shows today, and if that’s what you prefer, he can take care of you from here on out.  Since you don’t need me, I also assume you don’t need my…financial support.”

Jerry shakes his head. The Colonel’s trying to manipulate Elvis again.  He gets closer to the Colonel.  

“Don’t you try trickin’ him right now, Colonel.  He’s vulnerable, and all you give a damn about is using him to make more money.”

Jerry glances back at Elvis, who has his head down.

“That isn’t true.  I care deeply about Mr. Presley,” Colonel Parker says.  “Which is why I’m trying to help him through these next two shows.”

Jerry grits his teeth and shakes his head,“You don’t care.”

Elvis draws Jerry’s attention with a deep, shaky inhale.  

“It’s alright, Jerry,” he says softly, “I…I can do these shows.  Can’t let the fans down.”  He sounds more than sad.  Regretful.  Almost as if…almost as if he regrets ever becoming a musician.

“Wonderful,”  The Colonel smiles, a chilling, evil grin that makes Jerry’s stomach turn,“The dressing room is waiting for you now,” he says, gesturing for Elvis to come over.  Elvis slowly stands up, wincing in pain, and makes his way over to the Colonel.

Elvis puts a hand to his brow and speaks in a low, exhausted voice. 

“Let’s go.”

—-

Jerry watches quietly as Elvis gets his makeup done.  His breathing is shallow 

and slightly labored as he looks down at his hands, which are trembling.  

“You know you don’t have to perform today,” Jerry says softly,“You’re not in a good state right now.”  Elvis glances at the Colonel, talking to a costume designer about twenty feet away.

“I…I can’t defy the Colonel,” Elvis says, his voice barely above a whisper.  The makeup artist can hear him, but she doesn’t say anything.

“Just last night, you were talking about leaving him for good,” Jerry says, staring into Elvis’s eyes.

“That was delusional.  That was the fever talking.  I can’t let him go.”

“God, Elvis, why not?  Can’t you see he’s hurting you?  You’ve done nearly a thousand shows this year alone,”  Jerry counters.

Elvis shakes his head.  

“I can’t leave him.  Not after all he’s done for me.”

“All done,” the makeup artist says softly,“You’re ready to perform, Mr. Presley.”

“You need rest, Elvis,” Jerry says quietly.

“I….I need to perform right now.  I can rest between the shows.”

“Elvis, this just seems so dramatic.  You were just talking about leaving him…”

“I don’t know if it’s possible, Jerry.  That’s all,”  Elvis stands up slowly,  “I gotta get on stage now.”

“Talk to you after the show, Elvis.”  

Elvis nods.  

“I’m serious.  We need to talk,”  Elvis just nods and walks away.  Jerry follows him backstage and takes his seat.

As soon as the curtain comes up and Elvis is revealed to the audience, the room’s noise is deafening to Jerry.  He presses his lips together as he realizes he forgot to give Elvis any medicine before the show tonight.  He knows Elvis can do it.  He just doesn’t want him to.

Jerry puts a hand to his brow and sighs, watching Elvis sing his heart out like he always does.   He gets up and walks around the hotel a little, then goes to the bathroom.

At 12:34, Jerry comes back from the bathroom to check on Elvis.  He’s pushing strongly, but his face is white as a sheet, and his left leg won’t stop shaking.  Jerry leaves to call Priscilla after a few minutes.

At 1:08, Jerry returns to see Elvis with a hand on his brow and his chest rising up and down with shallow, desperate breaths.

When 1:45 comes, Elvis is drenched in sweat and gripping his microphone stand for his life.  His knuckles are white, and his whole body trembles as if he’s completely relying on it to keep him from falling down.

Jerry almost wants to go on stage and stop the show.  He sits backstage, biting his nails and tapping his foot.  When Can’t Help Falling in Love finally starts, Jerry feels a sense of both urgency and relief.

Elvis is pushing through the song.  Sweat is pouring down his face, and he can barely catch his breath, but he gets to the last verse and tilts his head to the sky as he finishes the song, almost as if he’s asking God for mercy.

The song finishes and the curtain starts descending.  Jerry lets out a sigh he didn’t realize he was holding in.  Elvis keeps his head up to the sky.  His breathing is ragged, uneven, and can only be described as desperate.  He is unmistakably spent.  

Jerry starts to approach Elvis as the curtain comes closer to the ground.  Elvis doesn’t move a muscle.

Jerry moves a little closer, trying to get a read on Elvis’s expression.  He can’t see any sign of emotion on his friend’s face.

Elvis breathes in loudly and deeply.

He breathes out.

Jerry blinks and turns to Marty, who’s approaching from the other side of the stage.

When he turns back to look at Elvis, he finds him on the ground with his hand over his chest and his eyes fluttering shut.

----

Loves, thank you so much for reading. Let me know what you think!

[fullofgutsndopamine]

long distance dreaming (don’t remember how you tasted)

college au feat hasan

"Hasan," You huff, "I'm just not hungry."

His eyes narrow at you, "You're literally always looking for a snack-"

"Nice," You roll your eyes, taking the pillow from behind you to chuck it at him. "You dick."

Like a pro, because he's definitely use to this move from you-he ducks in record time, makes the pillow hit the wall behind him.

He pops back up, "Missed."

"Hasan!" You lean forward, about to grab another pillow from behind you, but he puts his hands up in mock surrendor.

"Fine," he says, but the smirk that pulls on the edge of his lips says something different, "Listen, I'm gonna be late for my meeting-i'll text you?"

It's a question, not a stament.

“Maybe.”

As if you’d be able to fall asleep without calling him, without hearing his voice or his stories form the meeting.

“I’ll make it up to you,” he promises, rounding to the bed and leaning in to squeeze your shoulder. “I promise.”

You can smell his cologne, dark and woodsy, along with the toothpaste he used earlier, and you try to not think to hard about it, instead shoving him.

“Go, before you’re late.”

He gives you one final look before slipping out the door, leaving with a gentle knock to the door.

You and Hasan were inseparable since your first day at school.

He’s a year ahead of you, but the room advisor for the form you stayed in-and somehow, he knew you were anxious your first day.

you’d insist you were playing it cool, have no idea how he realized you were scared, nails bitten down to bloody beds, dark bags under your eyes from the lack of sleep-

Hasan would tell it how it is.

He could practically feel the anxious energy radiating off of you-and he remembers his freshmen year, how terrified he was, how he puffed his chest out and acted confident until he was-

So naturally, he came to your side, knocked shoulders with you: "You new here?"

And when you didn't break into a smile, immediately become putty in his hand, instead a simple shrug, too anxious to even speak any words, he instead breaks:

"I got you," his voice is low and quiet, not the Hasan you'll know later, when he doesn't whisper, only yells, needs to be heard, "Just stay by me."

And you haven't left his side since.

The next day you come home to a small collection of granola bars stuffed under your pillow, an assortment of peanut butter and chocolate chip-

Hasan answers on the fourth ring-

"I have like, two seconds top-"

"You know, you aren't very sneaky."

You're huffing but grabbing the handfuls of granola bars, stuffing them into your nightstand drawer, holding your phone with your shoulder and praying he doesn't hear you slowly unwrapping one of them-

"I don't have the slightest idea what you're talking about-"

"Hasan, you bastard-I can hear you smiling-"

"And I can hear you eating them," He counters, "I gotta go. I'll call you tonight?"

"Give 'em hell," You sigh, "Talk to you tonight."

Days pass.

Hasan acts like he always shares his food, ranting about his classes as he sits across from you, acting like he's full and giving you leftovers-and for awhile you fought it, until it wasn't worth it and you just took it.

More time passes-the hiding spots get arguably worse or better, depending on how your mood is after classes: hidden in the pages of your used textbooks, shoved in the sleeves of your pajama top-on top of the bathroom door, where you can't reach, so you have to wait for him to come over, act like you can't see his smirk as he says:

"Who would do such a thing?"

He holds the food up by his head, where you can't reach it: "Tell me you love me again."

"Hasan," You'd huff, face bright red, "I don't-"

"That's not what I asked," He tsks, "Let's try again. Let's see-"

And the routine continues until he finally gives in.

"How much do you love me?"

It's Hasan, obviously.

He isn't slurring, his voice is clear, and it's only 4 in the afternoon-

"Depends," You try and play it cool, "What's in it for me?"

There's some light yelling in the background, followed by Hasan cussing, his voice comes back forced:

"Look, can you pick me up from our security office?"

"Hasan," You gasp, "You dick. What did you do?"

He sighs, "Can I explain when you get me?"

And you can hear how exhausted he is, how done he is with it, so you agree, hanging up and all but running in

To say Hasan looks pathetic isn't saying enough; sitting on a bench, his shoulders slumped until you finally call his name and he stands:

"Fuckin' finally."

The smirk that pulls on his lips says he's teasing, but you don't let him off that easily.

"No," You shake your head, "You're gonna tell me what happened."

He groans, "Can I buy you a coffee?"

Security pops their head up, "Off campus, I'd assume."

Hasan is looking at you as he rolls his eyes: "Obviously."

"You can buy me a coffee after."

He groans, "I got caught borrowing snacks-even though it's on my fuckin' account."

The last part is yelled over his shoulder, like he's trying to dive the point home to security.

"Snacks?" It hits you, "Hasan, you dick-"

"Don't read into it," His face is bright red, his hands play with his hair, "I just fuckin' misunderstood the rules of the café."

You open your mouth, close it, open it again-

"You dick," You huff, "You do owe me a coffee."

This time, his fingers tangle into yours, his shoulders slumped so he isn't towering over you as much:

"Come on," He pulls your hand, "It's a date."

And he smirks as he sees the red spread across your face.

[harlowsbby]

Somethin Tells Me

Maybe love wasn’t meant for you or being loved was something you’d never experience, you hated the way you always had a big heart and such huge feelings.

You thought that Jack was the one that he’d be the one you’d be able to settle down with but you were wrong. You knew Jack’s career was important and always seemed to come first but weren’t you important? Didn’t you matter too?

You sat on the couch and twirled and fiddled with the hem of your skirt, tonight Jack was going to take you out so he called you earlier that morning while he was in the studio to be ready by 7pm, the key term in this sentence ‘was’.

It was now pushing 11pm when you finally heard the front door opening up, you looked up seeing a very drained and exhausted looking Jack coming through the door.

“Baby, shit I’m so sorry baby Neelam asked me if I was able to stay longer and finish up a few verses on a few of my songs and I just.” You pulled your lips into a tight smile you didn’t feel like hearing his thousand and one excuses as to why he wasn’t able to come home.

“It’s fine Jack honestly we can just try again another time I’m sure.” You kicked off your heels before walking over to him you placed a small kiss on the side of his lips before heading upstairs.

He stood there almost frozen like as you walked upstairs he knew deep down that you were upset but you weren’t about to let it show. Once you got back in the room you removed your makeup and tossed on a pair of pajamas and got into bed.

You don’t really remember anything else after that just the sound of the tv downstairs and the microwave opening and closing, this is how every night seemed to go for the past month. You in bed heartbroken while Jack stayed downstairs figuring out ways to right his wrongs.

————————————————————————

“So she didn’t even yell at you? She didn’t argue back with you or anything?” Nemo laughed and leaned back into his chair. “So I don’t see what the problem is then? You’re good if she wasn’t upset I wouldn’t even worry.”

Jack was back in the studio with Neelam and the rest of the guys they were all taking a break when Jack decided to bring up what happened last night.

“No she didn’t and that’s the thing usually she’d yell at me or say how upset she is but this time she just went to sleep and told me we’d rescheduled another day.” Jack felt defeated some part of him thought you might’ve just given up on what the two of you have and moved on from him mentally.

“Well I mean from experience I know a girl isn’t going to wait around forever for you.” Nemo slapped Ace on the chest. “So she’s going to leave me?” “I mean I wouldn’t exactly say that Jack but I just don’t know really.”

Jack knew he had to pull himself together because if he didn’t the most important women he’s ever known will walk out his life. You loved Jack truly and dearly but this life wasn’t what you signed up for, you were tired of sitting and waiting around late hours of the night for Jack to come home, you wanted to enjoy dinner with him and actually go to sleep with him by your side but instead you’re waking up with nobody by your side.

“What should I do?” Nemo thought about it for a second he really wanted things to work out better Jack and Yourself. “I’d say take the jet to New York didn’t she say she always wanted to go? Get a penthouse suite and stay a few days up there, just spoil her and spend time with her.” Jack bit his lip nervously. “You think it’ll work?” Ace nodded. “Shit if it doesn’t work for her I’ll go.” To which Urban and Nemo tossed pencils at his head.

Jack could only pray that you’d be willing to go with him to New York, he texted you saying for you to pack your bags. To which you responded by say why he smiled and texted you back saying you’d see.

He stuck his phone back into his pocket with a smile on his face, he was determined to get things back on track soon enough.

————————————————————————

“Are you going to be there or not Kirah? I need you to be there.” You whispered into the phone as you finished packing up your suitcase.

“I promise I’ll be there waiting Y/N but are you even going to talk to Jack about it? I mean he deserves to know.” She told you which caused you to pause what you were doing.

You’ve been with Jack for 2 going on 3 years and everything had been going good up until this point, Jack had his ups and downs and times when he wasn’t doing well or he’d shut you out.

There was more into this other than the fact that he had empty promises and never spent any time with you. Everyone only saw what was on the surface that’s how Jack wanted it to be.

flashback

“I feel like you don’t got me like how I got you.” You expressed to Jack the two of you sat across from each other in therapy. The therapist nodded and jotted down everything you were saying.

“What do you mean Y/N? I do everything for you I make sure you have everything.” You sighed and leaned back into the seat and looked up at the ceiling. “A relationship isn’t about material things Jack I’m not a materialistic person I need you there physical, I need you not a bunch of flowers and necklaces I don’t give a shit about all of that.”

“So what is it that you want from Jack?” You looked at Jack who had a bunch of concern and sorrow written over his face, he knew what you wanted from him. “I want him here with me I wanna be able to kiss my man and be with him in the morning, I’m tired of waking up to a cold and empty spot in the morning.”

“Are you able to do that Jack? Are you willing to cut back time to be there for Y/N.” You felt like you were being selfish right now but at the end of the day time was precious and you were done spending your time traveling around the world doing shit you weren’t happy doing anymore.

“I can.” He lied.

flashback over

“Just promise me you’ll be there.” Kirah was quiet for a few seconds. “I’ll be there I just hope you aren’t regretting this.” She hung up just in time because in came Jack.

“Baby, are you excited for tonight?” He grinned from ear to ear you smiled and nodded as you finished zipping up your suitcase. “I am you know I love New York.”

“Who told you that I was taking you there?” He said with eyebrows raised, “Ace might’ve texted me.” He groaned and rolled his eyes. “Remind me to slap him up later but come on the jet is ready.”

Jack grabbed your suitcases and duffle bags while you got into the car once he loaded the car up you took out your phone when you saw you for a text from Kirah saying she just made it to the airport.

Jack shifted his eyes to the right to try and see what you were doing more like who you were texting, you put your phone back into your lap when you realized he was trying to look.

“Who is that?” He bluntly asked you looked at him with your eyebrows raised. “Why does it matter?” He chuckled and shook his head at you. “It doesn’t it’s just whatever.” You huffed and faced the window, the rest of the ride was silent till you arrived.

You spotted Kirah’s car a few feet away from the jet. “You need help baby?” Jack asked as he came around the corner to the back of the car. “No I have it I’ll be a few feet behind you.” He nodded and took his stuff out the front seat.

While he was walking ahead you started walking in the direction of Kirah’s car, she got out the car and waved at you. “I’m excited for everything I’ve got planned I can’t wait to show you around.” Jack spoke but when you didn’t respond he looked behind him seeing you were halfway to Kirah’s car.

“Y/N!” He yelled and dropped his bag and ran over to you. “Just hurry up and put it in the car.” You rushed as you finished putting your bags. You turned around just in time to see Jack. “What Jack.”

He frowned and pointed at the car where all your stuff was in. “What.. I mean what’s going on I’m confused.” You sighed and licked your lips. “I’ve been thinking and I just don’t think things between us are going to work out anymore.”

His heart started racing. “I thought we were working things out though we’ve been attending therapy and I mean.” He started to blink rapidly. “I mean.. I s-swear things were getting better.” You felt like you were being selfish right now but you felt maybe a break is needed and that you’d both be able to find each other again if this was meant to be.

“I just can’t Jack time and time again you’ve let me down and I can’t keep doing this.” You spoke your voice barley above a whisper. “I told you within time everything was going to get better.”

You looked up at him his blue eyes now filled with tears, his hands now balled up into fist. Kirah even had tears of her own in her eyes she so badly wanted you to stay and work things out but you were grown and knew what you wanted and didn’t want.

“That’s the problem I don’t have any time left.” You gave him a half smile before getting into the car, Jack watched the car drive off till it was no longer in his sight, he just lost the women of his dreams and who knows if he’d ever get you back.