#I just sort of realized I haven't been very active in a while

[shadowduel]

all i wanna do is untie all your knots, dissolve all your thoughts

[heartz4levi]

could you do some general nsfw (and maybe sfw if you feel like it) headcanons for hyuna?

i blinked and suddenly, i had a valentine !

☆ thinking abt hyuna valentines day hcs . .

☆ hyuna (alnst) ,, gn reader . . i already wrote some hyuna nsfw hcs so here are more hcs (sfw + nsfw) but valentine's day edition ,, sfw section is sappy ,, nsfw section is also sappy ,, servicedom!hyuna ,, sub!reader ,, praising ,, this is just very vanilla and loving and heart melting to make up for what unfolded in wiege.

hyuna openly expresses her love and adoration for you every single day.

valentine's day is no different. in honor of the day that brings every couple a little bit closer, she'll be even more lovey—dovey than usual, ensuring that both you and her will enjoy the day spent together to the max.

the day will start like it always does. waking up in hyuna's arms, she'll press a kiss to your forehead when you begin to stir into a state of consciousness, muttering a groggy "good morning."

on some days, you two take the liberty of staying in bed a while longer, cuddling and basking in the silence that engulfs the room. your presence is like a soothing balm for hyuna, always easing her nerves and grounding her whenever she needs it. even in those moments where she doesn't know she needs it.

regardless of wether one of you gets up to make breakfast or you eat leftovers (or takeout.. that exists in this universe right?), breakfast will be served in bed. your side will be pressed up against hyuna's, looking almost like two leeches that can't let go of eachother even when having breakfast.

around noon, when the sun has reached its peak of the day is when the true valentine's day activities start.

if you've been rambling nonstop about a place you'd like to visit, something you really want to buy or a cute date idea that struck your mind, hyuna will take you to that exact place, buy that exact thing for you or go on that exact date with you. seeing the smile tugging at the corners of your lips, the sparkling of your eyes upon realizing that she made one of your small (but still very valuable) dreams come true is all she could ask for.

hyuna could live off of the bright, sweet smiles you shoot her way throughout the entire day for years and years on end.

if you haven't been rambling nonstop about something of the aforementioned sort, hyuna will wrack her brain to find someplace to go where both you and her could enjoy something nice and fun. a place where you two can make memories.

long story short, hyuna goes above and beyond to meet not only her needs, but also yours for valentine's day.

all needs.

at the end of the day, right when you think that everything is over with and you can rest, hyuna proves you wrong. in the best way possible.

carefully laying you down on the bed, her hands begin to wander across the expanse of your body, undressing you with slow and gentle movements. her eyes take in your body as more and more skin gets revealed up until all articles of clothing you were wearing have been discarded.

hyuna presses her lips against yours in a tender kiss filled with love. it doesn't become heated by the time she pulls away, beginning to trail featherlight kisses from your jaw to your collarbone, in the valley of your chest, onto your stomach and your thighs.

hyuna will take her time with you, treating you like a precious jewel that costs several fortunes, like a deity that she was born exclusively to worship. multiple orgasms will wash over you in that one night, but none of them are overwhelming. hyuna brings you to the point of climaxing through the pleasant, soft ministrations of her fingers, mouth and so on.

she'll whisper words of praise to you all night long, allowing countless "i love you."'s to slip past her lips, letting her lips come in contact with every inch of you while you moan and mewl for her, giving hyuna continous bouts of determination to show you just how much she loves you.

again. because every breathing moment of hers around you is spent expressing how you mean the world to her.

[lu-is-not-ok]

Hi! I was wondering what your thoughts were on the relationship between Hong Lu and Xichun. Namely (if I'm interpreting this correctly), how much he seems to care for her well-being. This has been nagging me since Canto 7 but he was so insistent on her being careful or joining up with him. Like you can tell how bothered he was. And HL, while often repeating some form of "my family sucks" doesn't usually let it linger? He makes a joke and moves on. I haven't heard anyone talking about it but this is the first time HL has shown care towards any of his family, even if later he is all "yeah if she dies, she dies, oh well". You're not fooling anyone, you.

You're right on the money with that one! When Hong Lu calls Xichun his 'most amicable sibling', I believe he's very much being truthful about that. Because while yes, she's rude and tends to do everything in her power to push him away, there are small moments that show that their care for each other is in fact mutual.

After all, she herself even points out that if it was any other sibling he ran into, he would have already been taken out. But Xichun doesn't do that. She doesn't kill him, or try to capture him, even though she's clearly aware that their Family is actively looking for him.

In a way, she's similar to Hong Lu in that she's never entirely straightforward with how she feels about things. She often puts on some sort of facade to hide the true meaning of her words, just in her case it's a mask of hostility, likely to defend herself in her position.

There's two moments in particular I feel that exemplify this by alluding to how Xichun actually feels towards Hong Lu, beneath her anxieties and prey animal rage.

The first one is this.

I've already gone at length about this scene from Hong Lu's perspective, how the thought of being an embarrassment to someone else in his Family causes him to shut down and default to trying to nod along and speed through the conversation as fast as possible. However, I think Xichun's response here is likewise notable.

Because she almost immediately backs up. It feels almost as if she's lamenting that he's still dealing with such situations as badly as he did back at home, and after giving one more 'jab' (one that you could even read as a backhanded form of assurance that she is in fact safe for him to be around), she takes the hint and ends the conversation.

The second one is the exchange that leads to them parting ways.

This is perhaps the most obvious Xichun has ever been about her own worries for Hong Lu. She's very visibly showing concern and outright anxiety over the thought that Hong Lu isn't taking things seriously and putting himself in danger. And then I believe she realized why that is.

If you've seen any of my analyses and theories, you know that I'm a firm believer that Hong Lu lied about the reason why he left the Jia household, and that in reality he's a runaway. This moment here is I believe the moment Xichun realizes that he ran away as well, and as such his goal is completely different from hers. As Hong Lu himself later states, "The path diverges, and we must each take the other trail."

After that exchange she continues to show concern for him, if somewhat indirectly.

I don't think she's saying this just to give advice on what Donqui/Sancho might be feeling at the moment. I believe she's implying that she's recognising that Hong Lu himself might be or at some point have been in a similar situation, and is thus attempting to empathize with him. Hong Lu's response here feels like he's taken the hint and is confirming it, clearly speaking from a much more personal place and experience.

And then, of course, is the moment they split up.

Another one of Xichun's backhanded assurances. She might sound rude here, but the essence of what she's saying is clear here. She will come back for him and maybe even support him.

So, yeah! Hong Lu not only cares about Xichun, but has every reason to! She's clearly one of the few Family members he has that actually seems to care about him in return! Even if it is buried underneath her harsh demeanor.

And regarding the one scene you bring up, well, I might as well repeat my own full interpretation of it now that we've gained more insight into Hong Lu after the check-up intervallo.

Note how Hong Lu directly interrupts Gregor here. I believe Hong Lu here is reacting very emotionally, effectively snapping at Gregor for what he implied. Part of it I believe is the implication that the death of a loved one would hold any substantial meaning to Hong Lu, something he is extremely philosophically opposed to due to viewing all kinds of death as meaningless.

But the other part of it is, well, that the thought of someone he loved dying in front of his eyes brings up memories he doesn't want to acknowledge. So he snaps back with as straightforward an answer as he can come up with so as to not give himself the time to dwell on the idea. Because it sure is suspicious he has yet to mention the one other person in his household that is ought to be very amicable towards him, no?

[bookish-bogwitch]

Thank you @roomwithanopenfire, @rimeswithpurple, @blackberrysummerblog, @nausikaaa, @larkral,

@hushed-chorus, @alexalexinii, @monbons, @whatevertheweather, @run-for-chamo-miles,

@artsyunderstudy, @mooncello, @brilla-brilla-estrellita, @forabeatofadrum, and @aristocratic-otter for the tags over the past few weeks. I've had a crazy month (90% in crazy a good way) and too frazzled to come up with my own WIP posts, but have enjoyed reading yours and being included.

Here are six ten moody little sentence from Chapter 11 of Basil Pitch's Diary. (In case you missed it, I posted Ch. 10, September, a few weeks ago, then fled the country.) Baz is hanging in in Niall and Dev's room:

The last time I was here with Niall, he’d told me to hold out for more than ear scritches and the occasional carrot. Now we sat on his bed with a chessboard between us. “Baz,” Niall said quietly. “What are you doing?”  “Beating you.” I moved my queen to menace his remaining bishop. “With Snow, I mean.” Niall did that thing where the rook and king hop around, which shouldn’t be allowed, and I realized he’d won. Again. Somewhere, in a parallel universe, there is a me who grew up with someone to play against, demolishing a Niall who never went to math camp.

Below the cut: musing, a posting plan, and more tags.

Musing: I've actually written a ton since the last chapter even though I've been AWOL, but for a while no matter what I wrote, Baz felt out of character. I'd write a scene, like it, and then think "but why is he doing this?" Then I'd rewrite with Baz behaving completely differently, and that also felt OOC.

I worried that I'd somehow doomed myself with inconsistent characterization, but then I figured it out: Baz at this point is deeply inconsistent. He presents himself to the world one way, he tells the reader / himself that he's something else, and deep down he's a secret third thing. And sometimes his masks slip.

To some extent this is every unreliable narrator. But boyo has REALLY tangled himself up at this point. Something's gotta give. Until it does--which it will, soon--I have to be very clear in my mind, even if Baz isn't, about which Baz is driving the Baz at any given moment.

A lot of you can do that sort of thing intuitively. I can't. So I've been building this out (showing you just the headers b/c spoilers):

This might stultify some (most?) of you. For me, though, it's freeing. When my brain isn't trying to keep track of everything, my imagination can unfurl.

"'Everything'?" you ask. "This isn't that plotty a fic." It's not, but it's already 2.5x longer than anything else I've written, which means developing skills I haven't needed before. Anyway, my BPD chart and I are having fun. We're very happy together.

Posting Plan

I pushed myself to get Ch. 10 up before leaving home for three weeks, because Ch. 9 had ended on such a wretched note. While I was happy to have gotten it up, I didn't love the self-imposed time crunch (though betas @cutestkilla, @facewithoutheart, and @thewholelemon were fuckin' heroes). Feeling rushed had me stressing and second-guessing choices that were probably fine.

My plan now is to pause updates until I have at least a very rough first draft of the final chapter, then post it all at regular intervals. I know a longish pause means some folks who'd been reading along will wait until it's complete, if they return at all. To those folks--sorry, and I get it, and thank you for reading in the first place, and I love you.

Tags and shy waves to @brendughh  @beastmonstertitan  @carryonsimoncarryonbaz  @carryonmylovelies  @creepyspice

@comesitintheclover @cows4247 @confused-bi-queer @artsyunderstudy@chen-chen-chen-again-chen

@chronicallyhomoerotic @drowninginships @dragoneggos @excalisbury @emeryhall

@erzbethluna @ebbpettier @fight-surrender @fatalfangirl @gay-at-ikea

@fiend-for-culture @forabeatofadrum @foolofabookwyrm-activated @arthurkko @j-nipper-95

@gekkoinapeartree @goblindad-emoshit @henreyettah @hertragedyconnoisseur @hushed-chorus

@icarus-n-flames @ineffable-grimm-pitch @ic3-que3n @ionlydrinkhotwater @iamamythologicalcreature

 @ileadacharmedlife @ivelovedhimthroughworse @shrekgogurt @im-gettingby @youarenevertooold

@monbons @mooncello @raenestee @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @messofthejess

[radioactive-yuri]

my jiraorotsu vision is like this btw

(elaboration under the cut)

orochimaru and jiraya: jiraya definitely envied orochimaru from a very young age because of their skills, whereas orochimaru was, as a child, mostly neutral about jiraya, seeing him as a mere irritant and an obstacle to overcome. i can't imagine he was ever too kind to them as kids, and i do think that despite their apparent disinterest, whatever form of taunting jiraya subjected orochimaru to as a child definitely built some level of resentment in them for him. despite all that, i still think they both grew hesitantly, awkwardly, unwillingly attracted to each other as they grew up. i think orochimaru eventually found themself unwillingly amused by jiraya's shenanigans; they're fascinated by anomalies and "moving objects", and jiraya most definitely caused quite a bit of movement in the village that kept them entertained. i think jiraya, without even realizing it himself, gained a new urge to impress orochimaru. whether that was a genuine form of attraction on his part, or a mere extension of his inferiority complex, nobody really knows.

jiraya and tsunade: they hold a level of affection for each other that's a lot more pure in its form than anything we get to see between either of them and orochimaru. as children, tsunade was irritated by jiraya and found him disgusting, and jiraya saw tsunade as both a stuck-up princess...and also his crush. their dynamic was always that sort of lightheartedly childish dance of "i like you" "leave me alone", but as they grew, jiraya came to respect tsunade on a deeper level as their healer and the heart of their team, and tsunade came to understand jiraya better as a person.

tsunade and orochimaru: as kids, orochimaru definitely took comfort in tsunade. i think a lot about what they were like as a child, and what tsunade was like as a child, and the dynamic that always seems to emerge in my mind is one where tsunade came the closest to being a safe person for orochimaru. they were very quiet as a child, and probably let her do all the talking on their behalf. she was their standard for what a "normal" child was, so they'd look to her for proper emotional responses to situations. she'd hold their hand by instinct whenever they entered a social situation. she'd let them under her blanket on particularly cold nights. they developed a crush on her without even realizing it, there was no single moment of falling for her, it was just the realization that they'd grown attached to her warmth. they only noticed it when she was away from them. and even now, as adults, after everything that happened, both of them still hold traces of this dynamic. orochimaru trusts tsunade by instinct, approaching her for help even while sick and in pain, and tsunade still considers it. because helping them, healing them, protecting them, it all comes so naturally to her. she has to make the conscious choice not to do so. and they're hurt when she does make that choice, because to them, it still feels like a betrayal, even though they haven't been allies for years. because the expectation is still set in their mind, the assumption that tsunade senju is "safe". they don't hesitate to attempt to kill her, of course, but they don't actively want to do it either. after their family, she was the first person they got close to caring for.

[markantonys]

While I still don't think the show has done enough to show why the world despises and fears male channelers (since it really should've been embedded into the world building, so far we only know that the Aes Sedai hate and fear them) and it does kinda lessen the impact of the narrative that none of the EF5 had at least an initial gut reaction to Rand being able to channel. I do wonder how they're gonna handle that topic moving forward, cause it kinda has to be addressed now that Rand is actively channeling. I could see it being expanded more deeply as Rand's madness progresses/tie it into his arc.

the show has made it ABUNDANTLY clear that Male Channelers Are Considered Bad News By All. it IS embedded into the worldbuilding. was the king saying that logain's gone mad and trying to kill him not enough for you? was the people of tar valon jeering and throwing fruit at him not enough for you? was rand and mat saying "hey if i'm a male channeler please kill me" not enough for you? was rand's terror the second he realized selene saw him channel not enough for you? was selene's act of how a normal person would react to finding out her boyfriend can channel not enough for you? was his heartbroken yet unsurprised reaction to her rejection not enough for you? was the whole backstory of a male channeler causing the apocalypse not enough for you? do you think that show-onlys are completely incapable of putting all these pieces together along with aes sedai treatment of male channelers and coming to the conclusion that male channelers are probably not very popular with most people and it's going to be very tough for rand that he is one?

literally what else should they have done that would make sense within the very small world and very early story of the first 2 seasons/3 books that they didn't already do? shown emond's fielders sitting around the dinner table talking about how much they hate and fear male channelers when none of them has ever met one and thus it's not relevant to their lives? wasted time doing a whole sidequest for rand in s2 where his abilities are discovered by some Average Citizens and they react badly? shit all over show!mat's characterization and given him a negative reaction to rand in s2 that would not make sense for his current show headspace, just for the sake of furthering rand's randpain? i'm sick of the rand stans who act like rand is the only character who matters and mat's characterization should be sacrificed just so we can go "oh poor rand uwu even his own best friend is mean to him". portraying mat in 2x06 as the sort of person who bullies and kicks his best friend while he's down would've been beneficial because......? what is so wrong with the show making the ef5 feel like mutually loyal friends instead of "rand is the best and most loyal friend in the world but the rest are little shits who abandon him as soon as the going gets tough"? seeing as in the books, mat continues to be an extremely loyal friend to rand throughout the series but most readers are too stupid to see through his unreliable narration and realize he doesn't mean it when he says that rand channeling is like him eating babies, i'm not surprised the show decided to simplify things in order to convey the true heart of mat's character (loyal and caring friend to rand) in a more obvious manner.

and i guarantee you that no show-only is going "oh, it's only aes sedai who have a problem with male channelers, everyone else thinks they're cool". that's not happening. show-onlys are not stupid, and they understand that male channelers are considered bad news by all; or maybe they haven't thought much yet about how male channelers are viewed by the average public, but in future seasons once we see rand getting shit from the average public, they are not going to be surprised or confused or go "but i thought it was only aes sedai who had a problem with them and everyone else thinks they're cool?", they're going to go "oh, well we've seen how much aes sedai hate them, so it makes sense that everyone else does too". stop. think for 2 seconds about "have i actually seen a large number* of show-onlys misunderstanding X and/or do i think it's plausible that a large number of show-onlys would be likely to misunderstand X, or do show-onlys have enough context clues to figure out X for themselves or to be unsurprised when X is expanded on and made more explicit in future seasons and i'm working myself up into a state over a non-issue?"

*there are always going to be a handful of people incapable of critical thinking who willfully misunderstand what the show is showing us, just like there are readers like that with the books, hence unless a LARGE number of general-population show-onlys are misunderstanding X, as opposed to just 20 idiots on twitter, i do not consider it a failure by the show in portraying X.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Fully Set-Up Johnlock Discord Server up for Adoption

@theshopislocal said:

Hiya :). I had a question for you, [...] Around this time last year, I got back into Sherlock fandom (series four kinda killed my interest for a long time, but I got recced a Sherlock fic that got me back into it). Since I left Sherlock fandom, I’d gotten into others (Spn, Harry Potter, etc), and joined a couple of discord servers that were super fun and very helpful.

So I started looking round for a Johnlock discord server, and found basically nothing. The ones that existed weren’t very well organized, or weren’t maintained well, etc.

So I put together a server myself. Set everything up, even coded a Mrs Hudson bot to help out around the place. A couple people I knew from other servers joined, and we had a nice time for about a week or so, before I realized that I’d expended all of my gumption on the making of the server.

Turns out that, while I’m good at the technical side of things, I’m not really mod material.

So I’ve got a kitted out server, with custom bots and emojis and a broad range of channels, and, not to pat myself on the back, but it’s a pretty nice server—and I have no idea what to do with it.

I was hoping you might know of someone who is still active enough/interested in the fandom to adopt the server from me? Someone who would actually advertise and get people to join? Someone interested in doing the mod stuff that it turns out I’m terrible at? I’d be happy to stay on as tech support, and the Mrs Hudson bot runs on a dedicated server that only costs me $2 a month, so I’m happy to maintain her as well.

You seem like someone in the know in the current fandom, so I thought I’d ask. If you can think of anyone or you want an invite link to the server, let me know. Although, fair warning, the server has very few members and is currently very quiet :/.

[...] The Snape/Harry server I’m in has all these events and fun stuff and I’m just.. not really able to do all that, but I feel like the Johnlock fandom deserves a nice community server like that, if that makes any sense?

Thanks for your time.

======

Hi Lovely!!

First off, sorry again for putting this aside for so long... I haven't been having the best couple weeks, LOL.

Secondly, as we discussed, I would LOVE to have my own discord server, but here's the thing: I am Lazy™, and I just don't have the energy to run one full time and ensure Mods and stuff are sorted out, especially since I do have a full-time job on top of very little free time and running this blog, LOL. I'm not gonna lie, I am a lazy bitch, hahaha.

AND as I mentioned, I'm happy to put the callout for anyone interested in taking over a Discord server :) From what I see so far, you put SO MUCH work into the server, and it's very very nice!! I truly hope that it gets picked up by someone, I'd be sad to see your hard work put aside.

If anyone is interested, please contact @theshopislocal and they can provide you with more details! 💜🖤

Please reblog if you can to put more eyes on this :) As I said, it's a BEAUTIFUL server, and I would love for someone to be able to take over moderation duties from Lovely!

[dearweirdme]

Hi Rain,

I've been watching BV 4 recently and wanted your insights on Tae and taekook in this season. Tae seemed really sad and disconnected to me and tk barely interacted or made efforts to hang out with each other.

While members chose group activities, Tae chose to explore the city alone. BV is a time for them to spend time together as a group and enjoy but i sensed a weird block from Tae's end. He was there physically but not really mentally there if that makes sense. Especially important since they started the season saying they hadn't met or spoken to each other in some time.

Jimin is an empath and hence we saw him really taking efforts including Tae in activities and taking care of him. Other members just let him be.

This season was late 2019, was this a period when Tae wasn't doing well? Did you get the feeling that he was disconnected from the group? Till when did this continue and was this observed in other content as well?

Similarly in context to Tk, do you agree that they do seem distant. And doesn't it give some credence or probability to the timeline or story of them having drifted apart as friends?

As a Tae biased army it does make me a bit sad seeing Tae in this season. Would really appreciate some insights on how you or older Army's perceived this.

Hi anon!

Edit after finishing rewatching all episodes: Aside from me being in a rewatch kinda vibe the last month or so, I could not for the life of me recall feeling the way you (anon) did about this BV series. It was some time ago that I watched this in full, and I started to wonder if my recollection about Tae was perhaps flawed. But after rewatching, I still don't see Tae disconnected and sad. I haven't once seen this sort of vibe "Jimin is an empath and hence we saw him really taking efforts including Tae in activities and taking care of him. Other members just let him be." I paid attention to Tae and Jk ofcourse, and while I agree this is a very low Tkky series, I do not feel that they were avoidant or awkward. I saw them together in the background of things. They looked at each other with smiles and love all throughout, they went to walk, sit, stand next to each other often. As a Tkkr, this is what I feel was still going on in 2019: I don't believe in the narrative that Tae and Jk grew apart. It makes no sense to me in a wider context and I feel there is plenty to point at that not being true. It's ofcourse possible they had rocky times and therefore had moment that they seemed off, but I don't think they were ever distant for as long as the general narrative would have people believe. I believe BH made an effort to make it seem like Tae and Jk weren't something special, but rather just bandmembers.. and not the closest ones for that sake. You'l find special interactions or outings with many pairs, but never Tae and Jk. they are mostly together with other members present. I believe that was a conscious choice, and probably a definite plan that was come up with when Bh realized Tae and Jk were a couple. When you don't believe Tae and Jk are together, tis is not something you consider to be possible. I think for outsiders, nothing weird will be found during this BV series. As Tkkrs however, we are missing the physical closeness we know Tae and Jk had (even during 2019). For example, this was them in august and october (before and after BV was fimed).

So what we know about Tae and Jk, does not fully come out during this BV.. and I think that was an editing choice, but also Tae and JK and the members knowing what the deal is and that they just can't be Taekook for a few days.

About Tae's mental health.. it's hard to say exactly when he was going through the worst period.. or if it perhaps was fluctuating in intensity. I don't think from this footage we can say that he was feeling down. It's not how I see it anyways. But, people with mental health problems very often know how to mask very well, so it is ofcourse a possibility that that's what he was doing. I think it likely that Jk's scandal effected them during this trip. Jk felt the need to appologize, and whether that was something hé felt he needed to do, or something that he was told to do.. it's obvious the issue was something they dealt with while in NZ. I think it would have bothered both Tae and JK.

Anyways.. it's interesting how different people can have such different views on the same footage 😂

Warning… this is long. Your ask prompted me to rewatch, and I did a little note-taking while watching the episodes. At this point I have only rewatched 5 episodes, I wanted to post this today because it’s loooooooong and I kinda said I would. I’m gonna watch the other episodes the next couple of days and edit this post when I have finished. This is going to be my opinion on footage that was taken while I wasn’t in fandom yet. So I’m unable to talk with the point of view of someone who went through this realtime. Feel absolutely free to comment or send asks with additions.

So, they spent 6 days in New Zealand right? What we got to see was only a couple of hours of their time there. Yoongi said that 80 percent of film is edited out.. that is no joke, that is actually true. On top of that, the stuff that is chosen to be in the released footage, is the exciting/interesting stuff... while we might see some clips of members just hanging around (because the message is supposed to be that they're relaxing.. while this is still work for them on a certain level... you can't actually relax when there's a film crew around).. they're not going to show boring stuff (or stuff we're not meant to see). Tae and Jk are pretty lowkey and aside from my believe in their relationship being hidden, I also think their moments are not deemed interesting enough at times. Their vibe is different from Jk and Jm's bolsterous interactions, it's different from Jm and Tae's cute supporting vibe. Jm is an extrovert, very clearly so... and extroversion is often deemed fun to watch. While Tae has been described as an extrovert at times... I also think he has a strong introverted tendency (and he turned out to be an infp while taking the test) so Tae and Jk together are just a lowkey couple. To add to this further, Jm is an empath, but so is Jk. Their differences in extroversion is why the way it's practiced is also different.

Now.. more specifically about BV4. For context.. Tae did seem to have mental issues during 2019/20... and during this BV Jk went through the tattoo artist 'scandal'. Mental health issues are a tricky thing... because we're not always able to tell from the outside what someone is going through on the inside. So take into consideration that we’re possibly not even able to understand the actual state of Tae’s mental health fully from the little bit of footage we’re given… same goes for any member really.

To start with the "not having seen each other debate that popps up a lot". I think this is blown up way out of proportion (probably thanks to Jkkrs pushing it as a debunk). I'm not really aware of what both of them were doing around this time. They had a month off, which isn't that long if you also go traveling. Anyways, it's possible they needed time apart.. I can imagine things being tough from time to time, so maybe this was intentional. Maybe they just had different plans... Tae traveled a lot with friends and family, and maybe Jk just wasn't into that? Maybe Jk's perception of time was off and it was less long than he thought since he'd seen Tae. Maybe it's a members and Tae situation. Maybe he's very aware of not being able to mention Tae as flippantly as he does other members. Maybe they were off atm (though it doesn't seem like it to me). All sorts of possibilities, but I doubt they weren't in contact at all. Being apart while knowing that in a bit you'll be spending plenty of time together again is pretty doable for most people. You'll never see Jk and Tae act like a couple in content for real, they know they can't do that on camera. BV, ITS, Run, Interviews... it's all work and they will always behave according to that.

In general I think there's nothing weird about their interactions, but rather that it feels something is missing. We know Jk and Tae are touchy and they hang off and on eacch other.. we don't get that here. On top of that.. when we do see them together it's mostly them with other members around, while other members do go of as pairs. It's almost as if Tae and Jk need chapperonnes 😂.

I'll get into the episode after the cut.. otherwise everyone will just be annoyed by how long this is.

Episode one is basically them travelling. It's rather uneventfull. A lot of sleeping and Tae wasn't feeling great for a bit. I'd say every Jk/Tae interaction was pretty normal. I don't feel Tae was off during this ep and we get Jk and Tae interactions a few times with them seeming completely normal to me.

Episode 2 starts with Tae and Jk in front seats of the campervan and then next to each other in the restaurant. Seems normal to me. We see some traveling, some shopping... Jk talking to sheep... Tae happily learning the Chicken Noodle soup dance. Tae and Jk together might not be the main focus, but they can be found close to each other often enough. Jk goes off on his own in the morning, when he gets that chunk of snow. I tend to think he wanted some time alone, since he didn't even wait for a camera to join him... Tae asking him if he's alright I interpret as him checking if Jk is mentally okay. People need space sometimes, that doesn't mean they have issues with the group they're with.. but rather that they need time to just be without having to consider other's feelings and wishes for a bit.

In episode 3 they start with a hike, and Tae does wander off a bit.. but I don’t feel it’s because he wants to be alone.. but rather to see where the path leads them. When Jk approaches the table where Tae, Hobi and Jin are eating he doesn’t hesitate to touch Tae’s back. There’s more driving and shopping. Jk takes Tae’s pic at a reststop. They eat, shop and drive again. Jk takes pics if Tae again and they laugh together like normal. Hobi, Tae, Jm and Jk practice the Chicken Noodle soup dance again. I feel Tae is participating enthusiastically in everything they do. He comes up with ideas, he laughs freely, he interacts with the others naturally. Tae and Jk keep bot being the main focus, yet they do continue to find each other all throughout. We see them standing close, touching, laughing, walking together. I feel there’s no avoidance or weirdness from their side.

Episode 4 kicks of at the accomodation they're staying at. When Yoongi prepares their food Tae gets Jm, Jin, and Jk to participate into a joke-ish skit thingy.. Jk smiles at Tae adoringly. After dinner we do get Tae taking a walk in the dark alone. At that point though, you see several members taking a moment for themselves. I don't feel Tae was particularly sad. Pensive maybe? I think it's too short a clip to tell. The next day has them shopping again, and we get headband Tae and Jk (my weakness 🥰). Tae and Jk do the Chicken noodle soup dance with Hobi at the lake, after which Tae and Jk review the footage closely together. They go hiking as a group and Tae and Jk are closeby nearly all throughout. Tae asks Jk to stop because he wants to take his picture. More hiking. The episode ends with a chaotic preparation of their camping site. Again, I don't feel that Tae is particularly sad or distancing himself. They all take moments of solitude, which is pretty normal to me during a group vacation.

I'm now at episode 5 and I have not yet felt that at one point Jm was the reason for Tae to partake in group dynamics, but rather I feel Tae was enjoying himself. He takes initiative, goes to help when he can, is funny inbetween, has no trouble taking on stuff like driving, interacts with all of them.

During their dinner preparations and meal at the campsite Tae was very much taking a backseat. It didn't seem like him having a hard time to me though, I tend to think he was just tired. Preparing dinner isn't his thing, so the camera wasn't on him much because of that too. Dinnertime is often Yoongi and Jin's time to shine. Tae leaves to go to sleep without announcing it, and yes I think he was done for the day. I don't think it has anything to do with Jk or the members, but they had a tiring day with hiking, Tae drove for hours, and anyone will get sleepy in front of a campfire. It is possible that he felt sad ofcourse, but I don't feel that particularly showed in this footage. Jk was the one to ask where Tae was, he also took a quick peak to watch him sleep. They wake up in the morning and Tae does seem a bit subdued to me... but in all honestly, so does everyone else. When they leave the hottubs we see Tae wearing one glove.. just like Jk. During the drive Tae seems fine and happily participates in the singing. Tae chooses to do the swing while he could've easily passed.. he was even the one to try and persuade Jm. Tae enjoys it so much that he himself asks to do the catapult as well. Whe don't really see Tae and Jk's reactions to each other's jumps. When deciding who goes shopping for groceries.. I could swear I see Tae and Jk share a glance (but that's also possibly just me). Tae and Jk go shopping for groceries with Namjoon and Yoongi, Tae once again wears one glove on his hands. All seems well and we later find out Jk bought Tae a jacket.

In episode 6 Episode when returning to the camp site, Tae immediately tells Jm about the jacket he got from Jk. Tae is helping out at the camp site quite a bit. Tae is the one who asks Jm to come horseriding the next day. He also super cutely asks to hold Namjoon when they sleep. The next day they go on the helicopter flight and Tae is so happy to land at the snow. Jk is making a snowman. Vmin are the cutest. Namjoon and Jk trying to sled are hilarious. After that Jm and Tae spend some time together horseriding/cycling, but at no point do I feel it’s Jm trying to involve Tae.. I rather feel Tae is enthusiastic just because of himself. There’s really little Jk and Tae interaction in this episode. Jk was basically with Hyungline the whole time, while Vmin had a lot of moments. Only in the story untold do we get a bit of Tkk interaction when Tae gives Jk sunscreen.

Episode 7 starts with members arriving at the last place of their stay. Tae isn’t feeling well (carsick). Jm and Tae end up rooming, and Jk ends up with Namjoon. We see Jk sitting with Tae while he’s lying at the couch in the background. We see Jm massaging Tae who’s still not feeling well. Tae does go and watch when Jk prepares the fish. After dinner they play uno and Tae and Jk are next to each other. They interact normally I’d say, though they are mostly busy with the game. Jk has no problem leaning into Tae to help him decide which cards to play. For some reason we suddenly see Jk in the other side of the table. Tae seems to be in good spirits to me. Jk very confidently states that he’s the one sharing a room with Tae, which isn’t the case. Jk returns to sit with Tae after the game. Tae has to wake everyone up and hangs over Jk’s sleeping body for a while. So many headbands 🥰. Tae again is the one to ask Jm to ride the cable ride together. Tae and Jk ride to the top separately, which is a bit odd to me since they were the last two to go up. Later in the car Tae easily mentions Jk’s snoring and goes to describe it. Tae is a bit late to lunch, but in the Story Untold we learn he told them to start eating because he would take a while. We get to the part where Tae wanders through the city alone while the others chose to go on group activities. I think it’s important to point out that this is the only time that has happened during this trip and that I feel he was pretty involved with the others the whole time. You can’t really say Tae went out on his own, because he’s with a camera man. He looks in good spirits to me, so possibly he just really wanted to enjoy the city while the others went for more action. Doing things alone when you’re on a group outing can be very important because having to be social constantly can be draining. In the Story Untold we learn that Tae has muscle ache (from horse riding), so possibly that’s why he wanted to go to the city instead of doing something active.

Episode 8 starts with where we left off in episode 7. Tae is walking around town, having a burger and icecream. Jk is at the new fishing spot with Yoongi and Jin. Tae is home first and is super funny (to me at least) by hiding from Namjoon, Hobi and Jm when they return. At this point Tae is very clear about not going with the other's because his butt hurt 😂. Tae helps Hobi and Jm with dinner preparations and joins in normally and happily imo. They do funny skits. Jk walks in when Jm and Tae do a scene... considers what he's seeing for a few seconds.. and decides it's nothing new 😂. Jk tries to but in wiht the cooking, which neither Tae and Jm want him to do and they send him away. Tae: "I got rid of the intruder" 😂. Later on Jk helps Tae get the rice.. again nothing weird about it. They have a very happy dinner after which they start to dance and sing. Tae and Jk are next to each other, though not physically close like we know them to be. To me they seem a normal, happy part of the group. Tae looks at Jk dancing with a huge smile on his face. We get an entertaining game of UNO during which Tae is proud to not finish last. Jk goes off to bed as soon as he's done. Tae stays to watch the others finish.

During their solo interviews both Tae and Jk express having had a great trip. Tae hopes fans won't have a problem with him having gained a bt of weight (which... hello, he looks amazing) and eating a lot. Jk actually apologizes for the tattoo artist 'scandal', but he emphasizes having been happy on the trip.

[singleactionjack]

Just had a realization about It Has No Name from Midnight and it's keeping me awake

What if it just doesn't know any better?

Spoilers for Doctor Who series 15/season 2 "The Well"

I've been seeing all these conversations about the Midnight entity since the episode came out across here and Reddit, people making all sorts theories about the creature and how it worked. Even I have contributed a few times about it. How it may or may not operate, what it looks like, if it was truly beaten, etc

But I rewatched Midnight recently and something stuck out to me that I haven't gotten it out of my mind.

In the beginning of Midnight, after the Doctor visits the cockpit of the vehicle, the mechanic (in training) says he spots something on the surface while the screen is up. Twice, he points out seeing something move, like a shadow or something, running.

A bit later, after the pilots have been atomized from the creature ripping the cockpit open, the civilians aboard the ship all begin to witness contact from outside. Banging that seems to demonstrate something is physically outside, banging in response to the crew on the inside. Eventually, this leads to the banging leading to an ever more paranoid Sky Silvestry, before she appears to be affected by...something.

After the banging ends and Sky appears folded up in the car, someone aboard indicates how thick the walls of the vehicle are, and how "nothing could get in". Nonetheless, the episode proceeds to operate as if something has possessed Sky, inhabiting her body. "it" mimics everyone, until eventually synchronizing with them and speaking at the same time. All the vehicle inhabitants begin to panic, paranoia overtaking them as they begin to speculate to the point of violence, plotting to throw Sky out of the ship. Blah blah blah, it's Midnight. A classic.

But looking empirically, after The Well, what did we actually see? We never see the creature actually get inside the vehicle in Midnight, we only saw it presumably affect others remotely. Invisibly manipulating Ms Silvestry, seeming to draw something from the Doctor, draining him.

Contrast that with The Well, where this "supposedly the same creature" apparently stands at 12 o'clock behind people, brutalizing people and causing chaos. It seems inconsistent and strange, but then I remember Midnight.

The walls were too thick.

The Well seems to chronologically introduce the creature by stating that it crawled out of the hole they were drilling for diamonds. People actively saw /something/. Something in the room, something physically present. No barrier between them and the creature, drilling breaking that barrier down before they knew any better.

Now it's in the building, in the base. And what comes from it's presence? Paranoia, violence.

It has me thinking, what if the people (and The Doctor) have it all wrong? What if It Has No Name isn't "behind someone" at all, but doing exactly what it did last time?

They treat Aliss as an innocent victim for the entire episode (at least the doc and Bel do), but the entire first half of the episode they are building a profile on this "creature" on incomplete information.

I think it's very possible that the Midnight Entity is doing exactly what it did the first time. It isn't evolving, or anything like that. It's manipulating people from afar and stoking paranoia in people.

I think it's not behind Aliss, or Bel, or the captain. It's remotely manipulating Aliss, and slinking along out of sight in the distance.

It clearly has the capacity to affect people's minds, and it makes me think it's just doing what it knows

Hear me out

Midnight might be the first time it gets to interact with any other creatures. The first two creatures it interacts with get vaporized immediately. It knows of other life but only through their deaths.

It knocks on the rest of the ship, curious of what's inside but cautious to not do anything to the contents. It hears commotion in response, and connects in the only other way it knows how.

It takes control of Sky, listening to others. It would like to communicate with them but it doesn't know how. So it uses Sky to repeat things others say as a means of understanding the language through Sky.

Eventually it figured out and begins branching from Sky to others, grasping their words and mimicking them as they're being said as a way to understand their use of words. Context, tone, not just repetition. Words aren't enough, they need to grasp the thoughts. But all the little humans are terrified, paranoid, and those feelings are all directed towards Sky- towards the entity.

Because of that, perhaps it assumes that this sort of thing is what other creatures do: sling accusations, make threats. So it looks at the room And finds the one outlier- The Doctor. He's not having the accusations, they should do that to him too. So it starts to make Sky only mimic /him/ because he doesn't conform to its understanding of these creatures.

Through Sky, it latches onto him, peering into his mind through his words, his voice. It puts that paranoia on him, makes him participate in all it knows, what it thinks humans do. Fight, panic, and die. It's thrilled to meet other creatures, beings with such complex experiences. Latched onto 10 through Sky, it even begins to describe this to the crew in words taken from him Fascinated by the strange violence filled lives they lead.

And only after the stewardess throws Sky out does it lose its grip on them.

Eons later, it's still on the planet. Sure, the sun is dead, the planet uninhabited likely since the Tenth Doctor advised them to "build a pleasure palace elsewhere". And all of a sudden, there are creatures there again. Humanoid creatures, drilling for diamonds, safe in their little environment controlled settlement. But their mining creates a way in.

It gets inside, seeing these frail familiar creatures, and handles them just like it did those eons ago. But now it knows their language, and their anatomy isn't too different from what it knows.

Clearly, that means they're supposed to turn their backs on each other and die in horrible conditions! It's thrilled! So it laughs, happy to help them do what they're supposed to be doing, psychically bonding to a person at a time. Encouraging people to die until it had only one host left, a host who couldn't hear it's whispers.

I think it learned humanity through our deaths and strife. Ten initiated first contact by accident and it wishes to speak to the creatures it met, but it only knows the language of death. It meets other creatures again and simply only knows how to communicate with them through death and suspicion. Thousands of years to hone its act, actually present in the room, able to use its immense strength to break every bone in someone's body. But it's not behind them, not literally. It's just psychically controlling people again, watching from nearby, and enjoying it's work. Helping us do what we're supposed to.

Perhaps it even performs this "staying out of sight behind people" because it believes that to be the reason the creatures it first met expired so quickly. Fast enough to stay out of sight, but physical enough to be there in that moment.

I don't know, it's better than it being an evil entity who just wants to kill people

Maybe 15 coming up with the whole 12'o'clock thing was something it was only doing up on him suggesting it. Maybe it was only behaving so "predictably" at times because others suggested it should. modifying it does by what it thinks these creatures want. Someone sees it behind them and breaks the mirror in panic, and it assumes they all should be like that. Performing theatrics when it feels people want that. But never truly understanding the creatures it's with because it only knows them through strife and death.

[efingart]

How do you came up with Mila’s story? I have to say is one of the best Bell stories I have ever read. Very cool.

Hello! Oh my god thank you so much!! It makes me so happy when people like JWIN 💙💙💙 I know it's a beast of a story and still going lol. (Also I'm going to refer to Bell as she here to make it easy)

How did I come up with it? Well, it all started with Cold War and Frank Woods kicking a Soviet Guard in the face 😂. That was the moment when I realized that Frank Woods was my guy. (I played Cold War before BO1 & 2 I knew nothing.) Also, given that before that mission, Frank was the first person in the Cold War crew with whom I felt any kind of genuine camaraderie. He's the first person who gave Bell a real compliment and then he rescues her like that?? Be still my heart.

The gears really started turning when Bell and Woods got to the fake American town. And of course, there was that memorable moment when Woods jokes around about loving Bubby, the Burger Town mascot (I think his love of Bubby/Burger Town is something more, it's about small joys. I could write an essay on it, but that's not the question here). Anyway, yes, this ALL is part of it I promise. So I had this idea in my head of Woods and Bell going to get burgers after their mission.

And that idea stuck with me after the end of Cold War. I just felt sad for Bell. I wanted her to have some nice moments amidst all the bad. Because I liked all the Safehouse characters I wanted to see them and Bell having human moments. And I firmly believe that Woods and Mason didn't know what was going on with Bell (they just don't act like it and that is another essay lol).

And then I went back and played Black Ops 1&2 because I loved Woods and Mason so much. And damnit if Black Ops 2 wasn't a gut punch. It hurt so much to see that after everything he went through Woods was alone. Not that anyone has to be in a relationship to be complete in life, but I was feeling sad about Bell already and now Frank. It just felt natural to me to bring them together.

My first approach to telling the story was through a comic. I started with the Burger Town story. But when I got to what would have been the final page of that part I realized I didn't want to just tell a story about happy memories. She was suddenly so alive to me. And while Bell's status was basically certain since they didn't cover it in the MP (and still haven't covered it in 6) - we didn't see her die so I can explain around it.

At that time, a comic took far too long to produce, so I decided to just write the story. And at first, I thought JWIN would be maybe 6 chapters. It would still have the structure of memories plus "present day" but Frank would have saved her faster. BUT THEN I realized well shit what would Frank's motivation be?? Sure they spent a night together before either of them knew anything, but now she's his enemy! So I had to figure out a way to plausibly get these two together and also redeem Mila.

From there, was (and still is) a lot of research about Soviet activities during the Cold War to see what would work for Milas past. I wanted to write the story in a way that Mila's memories or any other action sequences would fit well into a Black Ops game. I know Black Ops will grab things from history and expand on them to create a well-rounded story so that's the approach I wanted to take. And I want things to at least sort of make sense. The last thing I want is for a reader to be pulled out of the story for something like that.

It's also very important to me to stay true to the characters. I refuse to compromise a character for the sake of the story. To me it's part of the challenge of a fic. If there's something I want them to do I need to set up the story to direct them there or they just won't do it and I'll have to figure something else out. It was also important to me to have the other characters grow and reveal things about themselves.

Also, I don't like to compromise on canon. JWIN fits in the spaces between canon. So yeah, I was biting my nails before BO6 came out and MP does have me a little on edge but, I can get back to more regular updates. PHEW

I hope that answered your question. If you want me to expand on anything or if you have any other questions feel free to ask! I so appreciate you reading and enjoying JWIN and taking the time to tell me. 💙💙💙

[basedstoutland]

One things that has been fascinating about Toonami is how Tom became lowkey so procective of Sara overtime. Just how they became much closer to eachother overall lol. But I sometimes i imagine how would he cope if ACTUALLY loses sara for good. Hope that makes senseee

Oh definitely. According to the wiki, she was first activated sometime after TOM 1 started running things and with how we first see her in The Intruder, it was probably very shortly before that. It also states how they grew real close really quick. They definitely did get closer and closer as the years went on. I'd say the first time we really get to see this is in Trapped in Hyperspace where according to the TV tropes page for the event (and not the wiki), he risks getting infected with an evil virus to save her from the very same one. It gets even more obvious in the Toonami webcomic that explains TOM 3's origin, Toonami Endgame. In this one, SARA literally gets kidnapped by a robotic space pirate and TOM's main goal is to save her and all that...Remember how in Intruder II she theorized that their intruder (before they realized it was The Intruder) was after her AI Core so they could use it? Seen here at 1:41 in. It's definitely them thinking back on the incident that happens in Endgame. And then he just becomes more and more protective after seeing her die...twice. Once in Intruder II and again in Countdown. He's...definitely traumatized by these events. He even tells them all to get to the ship and leave him behind in The Forge...it's not really clear whether he knew for a fact that SARA would copy herself and then stay there with him and create a new body and everything. He was probably more concerned...maybe to an irrational amount, about her than he was for himself. ...And then she brought him back, melted a gun just be being constructed from hard light and being badass, and blew up all the remaining evil aliens that were after their new friends by literally controlling their ships to blow up. I've also noticed- how in The Return (at 0:09 to about 0:38), when he thinks SARA somehow became the old version of herself...he almost sounded tired while also confused. If she really did become the old version of herself then, he probably would've tried fixing it, hopefully... ...I really don't know how well he would cope with actually losing SARA permanently. Though it does remind me of something- a comment on a video of this intro.

Specifically the first part that says: "If I haven't noticed, I think TOM's small moments of depression might be the aftermath of Intruder 2 and Countdown plus the reason he felt lonely at the start of The Forge; he never enjoyed SARA getting killed off and wants some sort of security to save her, and just imagine what that sort of feeling of dread could be if that was to official occur--he would really feel completely lost, and even small talk is what TOM could be doing to mask his uneasy fear of that happening. But hey, all of this is just my opinion, feel free to think whatever else it could be..." So yeah...TOM himself has probably thought of the possibly already...and it leaves him in such a depressed state... Thanks for sending the ask and giving a reason to over explain things Toonami related... This whole answer could've been a few sentences long, huh?

[lady-of-ocs]

Me, posting about something OTHER THAN sports anime? It's more likely than you think

Alright, so as I mentioned in my post yesterday, I am ✨ill✨ (seems like I got it from my dad who got it from work because it took half of his office out at the exact same time). We think it's a form of the flu and I have been suffering for five days.

That being said, yesterday after I made my Haikyuu post, I was like "I want to watch something soft and fluffy and that I don't need to put energy into reacting to" so I started rewatching what's become one of my favorite animes, Sasaki and Miyano! (I believe that the manga is called Sasaki to Miyano, but when I found the show it was and instead of to)

And there is a reason why I like this anime. It's cute, it's gay, it's fluffy, it's slowburn with cute moments sprinkled in throughout, all of the characters are cute and sweet (on top of the main romance, the friendships in this show are super nice and I LOVE these little guys, the leads' friends are so supportive of them and I could cry), there's very minimal drama, it's wholesome (unlike some BL animes that high key scare me and that I'm too afraid to watch), the relationship is healthy, the main ship has the most amazing height difference, etc etc etc. I could go on. There are 12 main episodes and a little bonus 13th one and the dub is so funny and sweet! There's also a movie (I'm gonna rewatch that after I post), which, as far as I know, doesn't have a dub, but it's still really enjoyable. I also really enjoy the way this show is animated and how it sounds. The visuals and music are so great. I'm very particular about the animation style of the shows I was (see my mini rant over season 4 Asahi from yesterday), and I REALLY like how this show looks. It's a comfort show, honestly, which is why I chose to binge the whole thing while I'm sick. Grinning through the pain, baby!

I also just realized that Kagiura (a side character who mainly appears in the bonus 13th episode and the movie) has the same English VA as Oikawa! I was sitting there staring at my ceiling because I knew I recogonized it from Haikyuu, and then it fucking hit me and I was like "OH MY GOD IT'S OIKAWA." This was especially noticable when he called another character "meanie" and all I could thing of was him asking Iwa why he was so mean to him. How have his voice lines from this show not been used in an Iwaoi animatic, actually??? Haikyuu fans, get on that shit. (P.S. Kagiura also sort of has a side romance with one of the more active side characters, Hirano, though they don't get together in the show or movie, and as far as I know they haven't gotten together yet in their spin-off manga either. Their moments are hella cute, though, and I wish that I could have more of them!!!)

All this to say that I highly recommend Sasaki and Miyano. More people should watch it. The fanart here on tumblr (and what little I've found on Instagram) is also really cute. I cannot say enough great things about this show and it really is just a cute little feel-good show. Minimal drama and misunderstandings, great communication between the leads, happy ending (lack of a happy ending is why I'm too afraid to watch whatever that swimming anime is despite hearing that it's a great show), and ON SCREEN KISSES (well. One. I think the movie has more? I'll know in a bit).

SO HERE IS MY ESSAY TELLING YOU TO GO WATCH SASAKI AND MIYANO. IT WILL LITERALLY ONLY TAKE YOU A DAY TO WATCH IT ALL. GO FORTH AND BE GAY.

[misc-obeyme]

I like to think that lilith's Angel DNA was still active or strong enough to last generations after generations. So if her Angel DNA got more thinner and thinner after generations, it would make sense for Mc to gain power AFTER forming some sort of pacts with the brothers.

This makes me wonder if Mc is the "special one" in her lineage to awaken this sort of power within themselves. If Mc had siblings, wouldn't that mean that Mc's siblings could also gain/awaken their power, too? Since they all share lilith's bloodline. Which could make some things very interesting.

I completely agree with you that Michael (or god) have their eyes on Mc considering how powerful they are (regardless of whether they're human or Nephilim). Maybe that's why Raphael was sent to the Devildom to keep one eye on Mc. Both realms are currently not at war, but i'm sure neither of them want that powerful being, aka Mc to become the others side weapon if something were to escalate. Maybe this is why Solomon once asked Mc to side with humanity instead. (I can't remember what lessons it was in NB).

Either that or they would try to get "ride of" Mc if they become too powerful and dangerous. and once more, according to biblical lore states that ridding the Earth of these Nephilim was one of God's purposes for flooding the Earth in Noah's time. So they have done it before.

Also, off topic but; You used to watch Supernatural?! Omfg, this brings back memories 😭

-Angsty Anon.

Oh dearest angsty anon. I did indeed watch Supernatural. I started watching while season 5 was airing. For many years, I was obsessed. Though it got to the point that I just watched out of habit because by the time I had invested in twelve or so seasons, I was like I'm gonna see this thing to the end.

Which is funny because I still haven't watched the end. One day, I will watch the last half of season 15. Who knows when it will be, but one day I'll do it. I also rewatched the first 8 seasons, but it's been a while.

Anyway, I think you can go with any of the options regarding the angel DNA. The game's canon on this topic is sparse so I really think you can just come up with whatever you want.

I hadn't previously considered the implications of MC's siblings. I suppose that's why I considered most of MC's power to come from their pacts and so on. My own MC has an older sister and I can't believe I never realized that she would also have some of Lilith's DNA. My MC's mom might, too!! Oh man I kinda feel like that has to be the case because it'd be really funny.

Sorry got a little off topic there. Raphael's cover story is that he's there to be the new exchange student, but I think his ulterior motives are to watch both Simeon and MC. And you know likely to report back to Michael about the goings on in the Devildom in a more general sense, too.

Does the Celestial Realm know about MC's heritage? I can't remember. Lucifer was keeping Lilith's resurrection a secret from his brothers, but I'm assuming nobody else knows? Does Simeon?? These details are eluding me.

I'm just wondering if that would matter to the CR, you know? Just another reason to keep track of MC is their angel DNA, right?

I wonder if they'd even be able to "get rid of" MC, even if they tried. It's hard to say since we don't know how powerful Michael or God/Father is. On the one hand, I would think MC's power would be off the charts at this point, but on the other hand well... that's God we're talking about, right? LOL.

Anyway, here's hoping no floods happen just to take out MC. We get enough of that from Lotan being summoned.

[solavelyan]

Introspection for week 1 of @the-wip-project's Getting to know your story (through writing it).

I've really fallen out of the habit of doing regular solo writing in the last year or so (or… kind of longer than that, 2023 was comically horrible for us), so I signed up for this as an accountability thing to help me get back into it.

And then in the leadup to it I outlined a separate thing and realized, well, that's not really the point of the WIP Project thing, is it? So I grabbed another idea from the barrel that I keep putting off because I could never get my thoughts together to make a useful outline. We're wingin' it.

The characters are super familiar to me, but I'm grabbing them from a period of time where their motivations and drives are different from what I'm used to, specifically to force myself to ask if they've already developed the traits that make them who they will be in the future -- and a lot of the time so far, the answer has been "kinda but mostly not really", which is exciting to me.

And obviously it's fanfic, that's why I'm posting this on my Dragon Age sideblog (but I did sign up with ~bogunicorn I promise it's just me)

Set in 9:34 in Ostwick right after the Qunari uprising in Kirkwall, Thayet Trevelyan is a Templar in the Ostwick Circle -- a position that she took in order to protect her younger brother, who is her father's illegitimate son. Her closest friend and ally is Aeryk, the First Enchanter who ended up in a southern Circle after fleeing Tevinter 11 years ago. When she manages to convince her mother's family that her half-brother is actually her full brother so that they'll collect him from the Circle and bring him to Minrathous for freedom and education, she also finagles a legal escape from Ostwick for Aeryk -- with the condition that they marry before they make it back to Minrathous. They make it to Tevinter's capitol, and then… I don't know because I haven't gotten there but I hope it's good drama.

I've written Thayet a lot, especially in private storylines with my partner, and only gotten to write Aeryk a bit, since he's the wife's character that I have some shared custody of (which means I enjoy writing him a ton, I love him, he's so cool). Their interplay is really fun to write, especially when it feels so different from an RP-style narrative; when you do that kind of writing, the audience for it is really just the people writing the narrative and pretty much nobody else, so I tend to put in jokes or asides that I think will make my partner laugh or that I find fun but cheap. But if I'm writing for an audience of people I'm not in direct conversation with, the relationship with the audience is totally different, so the places in the narrative where there might be in-jokes, or very long conversations that are allowed to meander, or some other signs of RP-as-an-activity that don't really apply to solo writing, I end up having to fill in with details that anchor them so they're readable to strangers.

My wife is beta reading for me, and my first draft of the first chapter had some pacing issues that were making the foundation shaky, so to speak. It was just a bit too quick, and while the romance was certainly there, it was relying too much on the vibes of the other fanfic that it's sort of spun off from, when I really don't want to make that a pre-requisite read. In adding trying to mend a janky transition, I ended up going with a completely different tone than I expected.

I often end up feeling like my first draft of a thing lays down the text, and the second going forward are like laying moss on top of it to make the text more subtext-y. That was definitely true of what I worked on this week.

Initially, they got into a pretty nasty fight! It was damage grinding against damage and making sparks, and while I do love that for them, I had an issue with the transition between subjects in the conversation that I asked for help ironing out. And when I filled in the empty space that was fucking up the pacing, the tone went somber and stayed that way.

And I like it a lot more, because both characters are really showing off the inherent conflict in their flaws. I think it's more effective to see them both tired and beaten down and kind of disappointed rather than raising their voices or being openly dismissive of each other. They're both acting from places of shame and wanting to prevent more damage in the future, neither of them are advocating for the wrong thing, but their trouble to communicate comes directly from wanting to do the right thing and not knowing what to say to get there. And I find this internal conflict more compelling in the second draft, I think.

This is shaping up to be about trying hard to do the right thing when you have no good options, and also about self-doubt and finding your worth in situations that make you feel like you have none. And (this IS a romance) about holding onto the people you care about the most even when everything is trying to keep you from being happy with them.

Finally, one fucking fic that isn't inherently about the nature of grief. Nature must be healing a little bit.

[animasola86]

A few changes are coming...

Hello, dear followers of this very blog.

The title of this post says it all: I am in the middle of re-structuring a few things around here because my focus has shifted a little.

About a year ago I started this blog as a home for my Hogwarts Legacy hyperfixation, I took a deep dive into fanfiction, into oneshots, into smut essentially. I wrote so many things centered around Sebastian Sallow it's almost embarrassing in hindsight. But I am not embarrassed, I am actually quite proud of having been able to write so much, of having a muse to guide my creative (and dirty) thoughts.

It's been a real blessing.

But as you may have noticed, my focus, my fixation, has shifted, fizzled out a little.

It started when I began writing for Professor Sharp, dipping my toes into the older man/younger woman dynamic, and to be quite honest with you, I am still knee-deep (or even deeper) in that trope. It's always been a passion (a secret kink?) of mine to have an age (and size) difference between characters, so eventually I moved away from that particular character as well and focused on characters of my own.

I'm still currently writing my original story Innocence Lost over at @animasolaoriginal (about a cowboy and a girl, a slow burn love story), but the smut writer in me has yearned for something more, so I posted a few Smut Drabbles, very short little smut scenes I couldn't put into my story yet (or ever).

And from that very sentiment of having little outlets for my horribly dirty mind, grew another idea for an original story, something I'm still working on (I'm eight chapters in already), and this time I will finish it first before I post anything, I'm forcing myself to do that, yes I will (famous last words, huh? Don't quote me on that...)!

What I'm trying to say is, this blog, that has been focused around HL and Sebastian Sallow, will turn into the smut blog it has always been, but no longer featuring our beloved freckled pixel boy. I kept my smut drabbles neutral, dropped no names, no descriptions, just, well, faceless porn really, so anyone could imagine any character in the male and female characters portrayed if they wanted to.

I find freedom in doing so, being able to write anything and not put it in the confines that is writing for British characters set in the 1890s without having to put them in various AUs all the time.

And so I'll continue writing what I like, and I hope you will follow along.

I know most of you probably also follow me for my HL screenshots that have mysteriously stopped appearing as well. I still have my vast library of posted screenshots, don't worry, they will stay (everything will stay, this is just about future content), but if I ever dive back into the game (which, tbh, I haven't played in a long while, haven't even updated yet or checked out the new photomode), I will post new screenshots on a sideblog I will have yet to make.

Just to keep this blog cleaner. And smuttier.

Imagine finding my screenshots of pretty Scottish landscapes or cute Magical beasts (or broody pixel boys) and then scrolling down to find a filthy little smut drabble right under it. It just doesn't mix well anymore. (It never did, but I only realize that now, oops, sorry to everyone who probably stayed away from my blog for that very reason).

So, to wrap this up: I will remain a smut writer, if you are in need of a little erotica to spice up your day (or night), you will always find something of the sort right here.

I'm also not leaving the HL fandom, I'm still an active follower (read: lurker), and I feel like my time has come to let other people contribute to it. And if you follow the #sebastian sallow smut tag, you'll find a lot of authors that still mainly focus on him, so if you don't want to imagine him in my anonymous smut scenarios, you'll find plenty of other sources around here, don't worry!

I, for one, want to expand my horizon a little, look into other fandoms. I've read so many fanfics/oneshots centered around characters like Joel Miller (who I loved ever since playing The Last of Us for the first time), Arthur Morgan (who inspired my cowboy phase tbh) and even characters I never knew I needed in my life, like Simon "Ghost" Riley (who I didn't even know before because I never played Call of Duty), but this is tumblr, you are exposed to a lot of things if you allow them in - and it's been an absolute blast to find new things to obsess about.

So I hope that you, dear followers, can forgive me for branching out, for turning this once HL-centered blog into not just a multi-fandom blog, but a place for smut enjoyers of all types.

Because I found my calling, and it's writing porn. It is what it is.

TL;DR:

Future screenshots will find a new home in a yet to be announced sideblog.

The content will become more neutral, so that anyone can imagine anyone in the roles of the protagonists.

(I may still write for specific characters in the future, to be determined which one, maybe I'll return to write for Sebastian Sallow or Aesop Sharp one day, who knows, I still have some unfinished WIPs after all...)

There will always be smut. Because smut is life.

And with that, I thank you very much for reading this far. And I thank you for sticking around, for enjoying my content, in the past and in the future, hopefully. Thank you for your patience with me and for joining me on new adventures!

Cheers!

[littlest-bugz]

Love Isn't A Feeling

[one neurodivergent person's experience with the feeling of love]

This post is going out to my fellow neurodivergent folks, especially those who struggle with social concepts like the feeling of love and other similar things. This post has been drafted and redrafted about four times. This is a complicated subject to talk about due to the nature of the subject I'm talking about.

Ever since I was a child, and into my now early adulthood, I have always struggled with forming emotional connections to others. While detachment isn't inherently a bad thing, what I have going on was born out of trauma and abandonment, but I didn't always realize that. This lead me to wondering why I couldn't form meaningful emotional connections with others, and why things seemed easier for others than for me. I have always known I was 'different' in some capacity when relating to my peers, which boiled down to me having undiagnosed Autism.

Cue to me in 2024, the current year. I had been in a romantic rut, very much yearning on main. I have always craved a partner in some capacity, but as I continued to brew on the thought- I couldn't remember the last time I had felt love for another person. I honestly don't mind being alone, but something in me churned at the thought of not having felt love for another person for so long that I forgot what it felt like. I wasn't worried, per say, but I was concerned about what had happened to make me like this. Admittedly, I am a deeply traumatized, but I don't think that alone would crush that. I stewed for days before I brought it up in therapy.

I talked to my therapist, who is also Autistic, about how I couldn't feel love or have not in ages. That's when she dropped a bombshell-

"Love isn't a feeling- it's an experience."

So I was confused because I had been led to believe that love was a feeling- It's baked into western society that love is a feeling. I began to poke at her, asking what she meant by that because I couldn't believe what she had told me.

She went on to explain that love is the collection of three things; Trust, Respect, and UPR.

UPR is a concept that is personal to my therapist- she's talked about how she hasn't heard much talk about it outside of her practice, and I personally haven't heard anything about it outside of her. UPR is the abbreviation of Unconditional Positive Regard. This means extending grace to a person, knowing that everyone has their flaws and downfalls. It means forgiving when it's safe to. For example; if you're in an actively abusive situation, UPR doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. UPR is reserved for those who don't personally hurt you on purpose, essentially. People mess up and will hurt you on accident, but it's different when its abusive.

So she explained to me that love is the concoction of three previously mentioned things, and I felt like it just clicked for me because if I thought by the list she had given me, I truly did love some people- such as my friends. I asked her why so many people view love as a feeling because I had thought the same thing for a long time, and she explained that it's something, at least in the US, that is baked into our society. Think of it; The Hallmark Movies, The holiday of Valentine's. Many depictions of love portray love as something you feel, something that can be 'at first sight', if that makes sense. That made a lot of sense to me because I had never believed in the concept of love at first sight, and now I knew I was right in that assertion.

Love isn't and has never been a feeling, in my opinion. You can go your whole life not 'feeling love', but when you think about how its a matter of Trust, Respect, and UPR, it suddenly becomes a truly tangible concept. It suddenly becomes something you can point out within friendships and other sorts of relationships.

Of course, there will still people who do not love, even including this concept, but I hope this post can help explain something that can typically be hard to grasp as a neurodivergent person- I needed an explanation of love from a fellow Autistic individual in order to understand it, and I know not everyone has access to a therapist, let alone one that is also Autistic.