#I love them but next episode isn’t giving me hope

[alaanz]

Back at it again at the Kristy Kreme. Man alive did ep 8 decide that the fluffiness is now over.

There was finally the kiss we’d all been waiting for, and it was so right for them. They’re on such unstable ground trying to get what they each think is the best outcome. But this one scene gave a moment where they met in the middle ground of all of this. Ayan respected akks boundaries and wariness. He asked him if he could kiss him and then asked him to tell him if he wanted to stop. I’m so in love with this! Ayan understands that it’s so hard for akk to allow himself to feel what feels and let it be ok. So ayan created a comfortable environment for akk to let him know that it’s safe and he’s okay to be himself there. The kiss was so brief but it was a moment of vulnerability for both them. It was a steady step towards each other.

Ayan is much better at communicating how he feels and what he wants because he’s been able to thrive in an environment that encouraged and allowed for this. Akk may have had this when he was younger but that was squashed when he went to Suppalo. Both at home and at school he’s constantly plagued by the pressures and expectations of everyone around him. There’s nowhere he can just fully relax and take some of the burden off. Now where really except for with ayan. We’ve seen ayan provide akk with a space for akk to let some of the weight off and fall apart a little. And ayan keeps providing this space for akk. Ayan is no longer trying to push akk away with flirting, he’s actively trying to bring him closer now and learn more about him. Ayan just wants to be with him and relax with him. But akk just seems to be moving further away.

Akk and ayan were getting closer up until this episode. Then the kiss and confession happened and it was suddenly all too much for akk to handle. The expectations keep growing, directly from the school and indirectly from his parents, and akk losing his grip on everything. He’s at a point where he doesn’t know what to do so his instinct is to push everyone away. Akks got so many cracks and the only way for him to heal is if he breaks down and starts again. But he’s not letting this happen, he’s trusting to hold on tight to what he’s built in Suppalo and avoiding facing how he feels.

Akks being emotionally abused by the head teacher. Chadok is using the fact that ayan can’t afford university against him and stop him leaving. There was a threat in the way that he held akks shoulder and akk knew it. Akk is scared of facing the consequences of disappointing Chadok. He’s scared yet he can’t see that what Chadok is doing is wrong, that he’s not just doing what’s best for him. Akks been manipulated into thinking that this is fine, that he should be able to handle the responsibilities of the school and that he should be the best and not make any mistakes. He can’t see that he’s being controlled, and it really hurts. He’s lashing out and hurting the people around him too, he has no idea what to do with all that he’s feeling and is self destructing. It’s only a matter of time before he completely breaks under the weight of everything that’s being put on him.

And AYAN my god you’re scaring me. That scene between ayan and his mum was heart wrenching. Ayan took way too long too long to answer his mums question for my liking. Even the mum started to look scared. I was not expecting this and part of me is disappointed in myself for being shocked. I know that ayan is going through the trauma of his uncles death and he keeps reliving it. But he’s gotten so used to deflecting and avoiding that I kind of forgot how badly he’s hurting from all of this. I want this to be explored more, because it was clear from ayans response that he’s struggling but he won’t talk about it.

It’s easy for ayan to talk about his feeling to akk but he really struggles opening up about his life to him. Whereas akk cannot talk to ayan about his feelings for him but has opened up slightly more about his pressures as a prefect. They’re both going though they’re own things but they’re not fully connecting with each other. They’re on different pages almost. They can’t talk to the other until they actually accept they’re feelings and come to terms with them for themselves. Their relationship will take a lot of work for it to work, and it’s going to be difficult, but they can make it work if only they start opening up and rely on the other more. Once they do this then they’ll be able to help the other and offer stability for both of them.

[bakugoushotwife]

a/n: omg heyyy i make my grand return with my humble offering to @ohkento 's reddit theme collab!! i also have a piece for shouto coming up next, but here is the first one!! i took a while off after kinktober so if this is bad....lie to me!

warnings: dark content. nsfw. no minors. yandere theme gojo, no physical harm to reader, baby trapping, threats (not to reader), female reader, breeding, pentration, oral (fem!receiving), reader is kinda dumb lol.

summary: STORYTIME: I (28M) CAN'T STOP BREEDING MY GIRL BEST FRIEND (28F)!! it's a serious problem...i'm really reaching my breaking point here. i've been in love with this chick since high school and she keeps chasing other guys...but fucking me when the dates go wrong, help!

it’s been his dirty little secret since his years at tokyo tech. you’ve always been a looker, never were you short on attention from lesser men that aren’t worth your time—and yes, that includes when geto crushed on you all through the second year of school. but they never were quite what you were looking for, and every night of passion or attempt at a meaningful connection always ended the same—dialing up your closest confidant satoru to come console you and stuff your cunt full and wipe your tears–to make it better, like best friends do. 

satoru was all too aware of your little predicament, because he had struggled with the same issues–except he realized his fate years ago and was determined to have it. you are his and his alone, no matter how many scrubs that try to take you from him. if only you would open your eyes. you were obviously hopelessly in love with him, of course—that’s why no one could compare! and that’s why you always turned your teary eyes and pretty pussy to him after yet another date gone wrong. he knew he was the only cure, and he’s given up on hoping you’d see the truth for yourself. 

he tried to play the patience card, licking your tears off your face as he pounds his love into you, telling you that you’re worth so much more than those guys you keep letting break your heart. he tried being the nice guy that holds you after yet another promising prospect never texts you back–buying you dinner and bouncing you on his cock until you were crying from pleasure instead of heartbreak. each time, he buried his load in your womb until it was spilling out around him—hoping to give you no other choice but to pack your bags and move onto his estate to further the gojo clan with the very man at the head of it, but it seems your ovaries were just as stubborn as you are. he didn’t know how much more of this he could stomach—just waiting to be your knight in shining armor while laying in bed at night, staring at the pictures of you, both lewd and cute alike while wondering just how long it would take to have you laying beside him in his bed instead of the pixels on his phone screen. 

he’s had enough. it’s clear his plan isn’t working as designed. you must be on birth control—which is both irritating yet complimentary to him. of course you wouldn’t let these bums knock you up. is it insulting that this applies to his seed too? of course, but then again the whole dynamic was rather insulting wasn’t it? fucking other men and crying to him about it when they aren’t the perfect man for you. no shit—no man will ever know you like he does. none of them could ever compete with the life he could give you if you would just face the music. he doesn’t get it either. why bother? why look elsewhere? obviously you’re attracted to each other—so why won’t you make the next natural jump and stop it with the drama-packed weekly bachelorette episodes?

that’s okay. it’s really fine. satoru is such a good friend that he’ll help you, like he always does. he would simply help you to the conclusion that he wants and then everything can proceed according to plan! it shouldn’t be too difficult anyway, you’ll be calling any moment now! you had a date with yet another sure disappointment that gojo knows will desert you as soon as the date is finished. he’ll be dry and boring after the promising conversations you had in the days leading up to the date—you’ll be confused yet again—and the guy won’t pay either, set for split-bill city. gojo knows all of this because he’s ensured that’s what happens, of course! and this is the thirty-sixth man he’s had to pay off to show up to the date and forget about you. a price he’s more than willing to pay no matter how high, though it’s definitely added up over the years. and you know what—now that he thinks of it, none of them deserve you because their weak nature and corrupt morals. he’s been proven right every time, each one of these bottom feeders would take the money no questions asked—maybe that was due to his threats of horrific death if they so much as answered a text message from you again, but who could be sure? 

this one was especially easy to pay off, too. he didn’t even think twice about taking the money. it almost makes gojo mad. he clearly wasn’t heartbroken to walk away from you, and god you deserved so much better. you deserve a man that is willing to pay off any and every suitor that comes into your life just to make you his. you deserve a man so crazy about you he can hardly recognize himself. you deserve…well, him. he’s devoted himself to you for over a decade and it’s time for that to pay off.

your unique ringtone gets him out of his own head to answer, and of course, you’re crying and asking him to come over. pretty girls like you never learn, huh? that’s all forgiven though, as he is a teacher and it’s his passion to help you understand. 

“of course sugar. i’ll be right over. mhm–don’t mention it. that’s what friends are for.” he hums to you over his end of the phone, picking up his car keys to make it to you in record time. you’re your same beautiful self as you answer the door and welcome him inside, though he can see the tear tracks staining your face. it makes him pout a little at the sight no matter how used to it he is. he hates that you let these cretins upset you like this. 

“hey baby.” he pouts sympathetically with you, ducking under your arm to gaze around your familiar living room for any signs of a man he hadn’t yet heard about. he exhales a deep sigh when he finds none. he’s got his hands in his pockets, lips tightened in a knowing grimace. “so what was it this time? no—let me guess: split the bill and then he let you walk home in this weather?” 

you close the door after he’s entered with a heavy sigh. your bleary eyes fix on your hand still clasped around the doorknob, “yeah.” you tug your lip between your teeth and turn to face him. you didn’t have to answer him, for he already knew. it was borderline routine at this point and you were already embarrassed enough. you draw your arms around yourself to feel your own warmth, shaking your head. what was wrong with you? you used to be pined after, wanted—and now you couldn’t even get non-sorcerers to call you back. you haven’t had a second date in years, nor had an orgasm that wasn’t satoru’s handiwork. but even he didn’t want you permanently. you were a good friend and an even better fuck, that’s all. you knew it was pointless to yearn for him, sure he felt nothing other than his ever-present sense of duty and loyalty every-time he took your pain away–no matter the lies that poured out of his saccharine lips to do so. your sad eyes fix on his face, letting your plump bottom lip bounce out from your teeth’s trap. he smirks softly, cock rising because it knows exactly what that look means. 

but unfortunately for you, he won’t just hold you in his arms and promise that you’re worth so much more than you let yourself believe. tonight, he’s going to take what’s rightfully his—and his plan is already working beautifully. you never look away as you walk from the door to him, bracing your tiny and ineffectual hands on his chest. “what’s wrong with me, sato?” you pout, batting your long lashes up at him. his heart could stop just from that look alone. the comfort of his large hands covering yours soothes you already, making the tension drop from your shoulders. 

“you’re naive.” he answers, eyes as bright as ever as they glow like fireflies in your living room. if you were going just by the expression on his face, you’d think he said something kind or even funny, the way he grins softly and blinks his white lashes down at you in wait of your reply. you’re sure you misheard—every other time you asked this question he always said, “maybe you’re just too pretty, huh? ever thought of that, sugarplum?” 

“huh?” you tilt your head to one side, watching his expression shift to amusement. “naive? wh-what do you mean by that?” 

“well, if you weren’t so naive, you’d know, now wouldn’t you?” he pokes his tongue between his teeth, tucking his hands behind his back while you still lean helplessly against him. he likes feeling the weight of your body on his, and he’ll like it even more when he knows it’s a permanent thing. “you’re on birth control.” he states, and your confusion sets in even deeper. your brows furrow, but you nod. 

“yeah? what about that makes me naive?” you posit, used to his antics for the most part. you’ve been around him far too long to mistake his bluntness as an attack to you, even if it stings just a touch. though you did ask, and you have used him as your sexual relief and shoulder to cry on for years now. maybe he’s fed up with lying to save your feelings. 

he looks around for a second, humming. “where is it?” 

you also know better than to question him. if he’s asking you these questions it has to be for a reason—and you don’t have to understand him in the moment. just do what you’ve always done and trust him, support him on and off the battlefield–and never hesitate. it could be the difference between life and death. you learned that on missions together years ago. 

“in my nightstand?” you tilt your head to the other side. he has to admit your astonishment is adorable. he smiles down at you, cupping your cheek lightly. his fingers are so long that his thumb rests on the corner of your lips, fingertips brushing back your hair. 

“go get it for me.” he says as if he asked you to pass him the remote. you narrow your eyes to really study him—and then you see it. the teeming rage, the simmering crazy behind his eyes as they look at you. he is the most powerful man in the world, even if you were scared, there was nothing you could do but obey. but you trust him. and you nod. you turn to pad off to your bedroom and the clicks of his expensive boots follow. you’re used to the butterflies tickling your stomach as you lead him to bed, but you know something’s different this time. you feel like you’ll puke butterflies. but nonetheless, you pull the drawer of your nightstand open and fetch the little foil pack out of it, only a few pills missing from this month’s prescription. you turn to face him with it, mind racing on what he could possibly be doing. knowing him, he’s toying with you–trying to make you as nervous as possible and all this worrying is for no good reason. 

he sits at the edge of your bed, seemingly watching you with interest. he’s happy that you’re humoring him, that’s for sure. not even the faintest hint of protest. maybe you’re not as naive as he thought. in fact, your effortless obedience has his the crotch of his loose hakama’s tightening quickly. your heart jumps in your throat at the sight of him as it usually does—satoru gojo is far too beautiful to be in your house, supposedly telling you why you couldn’t keep a man. the black compression shirt was nearly criminal when it was wrapped around his perfect body. 

“good girl. now flush ‘em down the toilet for me.” he beams, blinding white teeth baring to smile at you. it was a simple request, really. he needed you to stop taking that poison and to stop entertaining the idea of other men. 

“why?” you swallow harshly, voicing your underlying suspicion. 

“don’t you trust me, baby?” he replies with a quickness, tilting his head to mirror yours. he’s doing well to keep himself together–you don’t understand his love for you yet, but he’ll take care of that. he’s a teacher, remember? “that stuff’s not good for you.” 

you hum. the side effects have been brutal, but you’re hardly in the spot for a baby. you can’t even get a boyfriend, much less a baby daddy. “yeah…i know. sucks taking it. guess i could get an iud or something instead.” you think aloud, voice becoming distant as you turn your back to him and dump your pills in the bathroom attached to your small room. you really undersell yourself. you could have been his bride eight years or so ago and been living large. but he’s going to fix it now. his jaw clenches at that declaration, and you feel him watching you the entire time—the doorway a straight shot from the spot he sat in on your bed. 

“no.” he says simply, the lightheartedness gone abruptly. it sends a shiver down your spine, makes your brain alert to the changes within him as he stands and cages you into the bathroom, broad arms stretching to block off the doorway. 

no? he doesn’t want you to protect yourself in any way? that seems a little ridiculous, but maybe he had a good reason. “satoru…i can’t get pregnant right now.” 

“why not?” he asks, looking over your little body nearly trembling from the darkness of his cursed energy growing more oppressive, nearly sucking the air out of the room. your heart pounds, more confused than you were at the start. 

“because i’m…single?” you try carefully, not sure exactly what you were dealing with here. satoru has always been so happy-go-lucky, even when he shouldn’t be. you remember begging him to talk out his stress so that he didn’t explode right after suguru left. so this anger you see set in his features shocks you, his bright and clear sky-colored eyes are clouded and murky, more cerulean than you’ve seen before. his brow is set and you can see the muscles twitching in his jaw. but he’s still smiling, and that for whatever reason is still real. 

“there’s that naivety again, princess.” he licks his teeth, shifting his weight from foot to foot. you look like a deer in the headlights, and he’s giddy at the rush that gives him. you’re finally in his grasp. “you’ve never been single. not since hmmm let’s see, march fifteenth, 2006.” he grins at you–”which makes all this dating real offensive, sweetheart.” 

you want to laugh, but decide against it considering his unpredictability. you shake your head instead, backing yourself to the wall. “what on earth are you talking about? we’re friends–”

“friends that fuck!” he laughs a strained snicker, straightening his posture. “and make sweet hot love, of course. friends that cuddle on the couch and have sleepovers. come on. we’re both adults, don’t insult me. you love me! which is great, because i love you too. i love you so much i’ve made sure that no one could steal you from me.” 

your brows must reach your hairline at that. “stop, satoru. don’t say that! you can’t mean it–fuck, you’re supposed to be married to a kamo or zen’in girl so you can keep making powerful gojo’s right? isn’t that what you always said in school?” 

“you’d give me powerful gojo’s.” he smirks, breaking the barrier of the bathroom’s threshold by stepping closer to you, leaning down to be on face level. “i was only trying to make you jealous sugar! just like this whole stunt you’ve been pullin’, dating around to try to find someone that makes you feel like i do? tch, hahahaha—it’s impossible!! just stop it, be mine and be happy like you should be.” he grasps your chin with a surprising gentleness given his unhinged and maniacal laughter, smiling down at you with something you recognize as his power-trip going off the rails—but. 

but you’d be lying if you said you were scared. he’s declaring his love for you in the most profound way possible, however crazy it–and he–may be. and you’d be lying if you said he didn’t absolutely see right through you. he has the six eyes after all, you should have known he knew what you were trying to do. you were trying to numb the pain of never being his…but you were actually manufacturing that whole scenario. you’re the only girl he’s ever seen, and it’s clear from the desperation mixed in with the insanity—he needs you. 

you reach back and flush the toilet, letting the little white pills circle the bowl and disappear entirely. satoru gojo has always been insane. you’ve seen it firsthand on many missions and battles against curses and sorcerers alike. it just surprised you to see him turn that look upon you–but now you know it was just to get your attention. 

though you don’t doubt what he’s capable of, you have no intention of pushing him to find out.

his eyes go from crazy to ravenous in seconds. you’ve accepted his proposal with hardly any effort and he intends to show you the difference between his sweet hookups and his passionate need to claim the woman of his dreams. 

“so you…scared off all those guys?” you ask, raising a brow as your face still rests in his clutches. he swipes his thumb over your bottom lip, nodding vigorously. 

“sure did, princess. i was trying to let you figure it out on your own…” he sighs, brushing your hair back behind your ears as his eyes scan over your body again. he needs to feel you. “but you’re not a quick learner, hence why i’m on plan b.” he winks, scooping you over his shoulder moments later. he puts you on your bed, the short walk made shorter by his teleportation. he’s just too impatient, brain swelling with the flashing images of you in traditional wedding attire and round with his heir. it all feels within reach now, and he has to try it out now. “gonna show you how bad i love you–you’ll never go anywhere else.” he mutters, lanky frame swallowing up your body, hips pinning yours to the bed beneath you. “you’re gonna give me a gojo and you’re gonna look so fucking good doing it.” he mutters, lips attaching to your neck reminiscent of the way they have a million times. though this time, there’s intention behind it—or well. this time you’re aware of the intention behind it. 

in all your times together, his dirty talk has been contained to praising your body and how good you feel to him. his incantations to knock you up has your heart beating funny and wetness pooling between your legs. you make a soft gasp sound for him, elongating your neck to let him leave real marks of possession where you’ve previously resisted. your body writhes and twists under his as his teeth knick and nip bruises into your skin. he’d spell his own name with them if he could, even a ring and a baby wasn’t enough in his eyes. he needs the world to know you’re his, that you’ll always be by his side, that you were born to be his. 

“that pesky birth control’s gonna have to wear off though–so we have time to get married before you get pregnant–if that matters to you.” he moans at the idea, hands sliding under your top to push it over your head. his mouth moves to suck the swells of your tits once they’re exposed to him, humming out his satisfaction at the warm skin. your head digs back into the mattress—mind absolutely drunk on his affection and devotion. it’s all you’ve ever wanted and now it’s right here, and from the man you’ve always wished you could have—how could you ever deny him again? 

your hands pull at the fabric on his back, hips bucking up for a source of friction. he breaks away from marking up your chest to bare his to you, throwing his t-shirt into some corner of your room to be forgotten about until tomorrow. this wouldn’t be your room much longer anyway–you’ll be moved into the estate within the next two days, he wouldn’t be able to live without you now. then he’s pushing you up towards the headboard, ripping off your lounge shorts to reveal those cute panties he knows you wear when you’re trying to impress him. color him fucking thrilled at your puffy pussy lips indenting the fabric around them, making him groan at the sight. he thumbs at your clit through the cotton, sparkling eyes flickering between the growing wet spot in your panties and the adorable scrunches of your nose and the pinch of your brow from the pleasure he’s dishing out before he’s even really touching you. you’re so cute he can’t pace himself, needing to consecrate your importance to him in the best way he knows how. 

you help him get you out of your underwear, shamelessly spreading for him after hundreds of rendezvous—you’ve lost your shyness and he loves it, loves seeing your neediness for him in the glaze of your pretty doe eyes and the way you swing your hips around to beg for his attention. “tell me you love me.” he hums, nosing apart your pussy lips. his cock throbs at the scent, and you feel goosebumps break out across your skin at his command. 

“you’re the one for me, sato. i love you.” you whisper so intimately he can feels his cursed energy pulsing like the rest of him. he groans, submerging his face in your cunt with a genuine pleasure you’ve only seen from him. he loves eating you out, loves the taste of you on his tongue—loves how your noises only rile him into fucking the bed, whining and grunting with his own neediness that he could only unleash once he’s properly readied you for it. 

“you taste so fucking good baby…so sweet down my throat. get loud, i don’t care it’s an apartment. you’ll be moving out soon anyway.” he smirks, latching onto your clit to make your legs jolt like they always do. it makes him giggle every time, and the vibrations feel even better against your sensitive bundle. he rolls it around his tongue, letting his index finger explore the wetness he’s helping you create. he pokes into your entrance, knowing how violently you craved something inside. his thoughts are confirmed by the way you clench around the digit, whining and bucking into it for more. he’s more than happy to oblige, finger fucking you with two long and thick fingers while his tongue works overtime on your clit. he loves watching you at this part, enamored by your face as your hips involuntarily jump from the bed, smacking your clit into his nose instead of his skilled tongue. 

your entire body is warm, jerking like you’re receiving electrical shocks from the pleasure satoru reigns down, gasping and sputtering on the edge of orgasm just a few minutes after he started. it’s always like this with him–though this time was special because you knew your life was changing before your very eyes—that satoru’s energy was growing so rapidly because he’s letting go of all kinds of stress and pent up frustration and anger. “please—wanna cum please sato–”

“daddy. i’m daddy now. ask daddy nicely.” he chuckles as he leans his head against his free hand, curling his fingers into the spot he knows so well just to watch your mouth drop and eyes widen in absolute blissful shock. you nod–brain fuzzy from his constant teasing and his new nickname. 

“daddy!! yes—daddy! please, oh my god—daddy let me cum!” you sound so good when you say it–it’s all he ever wants to hear for the rest of his life. he can’t wait for you to make him a real daddy. 

“oh missus gojo can do anything she wants.” he coos as if he didn’t make you expressly beg for permission, lowering his face to your cunt again with precise licks, shoving your hood back to absolutely abuse your sensitivity. your legs develop a mind of their own and you’re spiraling over the edge before you can understand what he’s doing. floating balls of color cover your vision and you scream his name just as loud as he wanted. he grins in satisfaction, hands resting on your knees so he can push himself forward for a sloppy kiss; slick covered lips sliding against yours so you could taste your own essence via his tongue shoving its way in your mouth with a hearty moan. you match his eagerness, making out with satoru with more passion than ever before–because you both have the security of knowing it’s real this time. he maneuvers his hips until his leaky tip catches on your hole, his breath shaky as before he shoves in like he always does. you squeeze him so tight it’s not hard to believe why he lost his fucking mind over this pussy. he truly would do anything to make you his, thank god you didn’t put up a fight. 

“fuuuuck–” he whines a little, finding it nearly impossible to even move in the first place. you feel the burn of his fat and lengthy shaft parting your walls like they routinely do, mouth dropped wide open in pleasure. satoru hovers inches away from your face, so close that the ends of his hair tickle your forehead as he picks your legs up—holding you by the back of the ankles before he sets a brutal pace. his nuts clap into your ass from the way he moves, length curving just right to fill you to the brim. he doesn’t even have to try all that hard to bottom out against your cervix, finding the way you moan and twitch so adorable. “this is why you have to be my wife—i need you for life, sweetheart.” 

your eyes widen at that declaration–though you already realized that satoru would never let you out of his clutches again. you knew he would marry you as quickly as possible based off of his desire to also knock you up as quickly as possible—but hearing him call you that, first missus gojo and now his wife, it all felt so real. his cock slamming into you only drilled it in further, his eyes glowing brighter than you’ve ever seen. the air also grows its own electric field, suffocating and thrilling all at the same time. your eyes are glued to him, entranced by the feral look on his face. you try to hold onto him, but he’s moving so punishingly you can’t even get your hands to work, mind and body on cloud nine. “you’re so beautiful. i’ve been in love…with—you–for years now.” he says in between deep breaths, trying to contain all his focus into drilling you unconscious. 

you shudder, feeling that was completely in the realm of possibility. his balls ache, the need to breed you just as heavy as all the other times you’ve come to him to clean up every mess of yours ever since he’s known you, the need to make you his in a way no one else would be allowed to—it’s carnal. he can’t stop until you’re full of his seed and it takes. he needs to see your breasts heavy with milk to feed his baby from. he needs to see you struggle with the weight of your belly so he can urge you to rest and let him serve you like you should be. he needs to see what the combination of your love looks like; what these last ten years of hard work would become. he’s painting your insides white and still pumping just as fast as before, watching your face tick and jerk with the pleasure you’re experiencing as you tip off of your own peak. he grins, shoving that cum as deep as it will go. he stops when he knows your body can’t take anymore, cuddling you to his chest until you fall asleep safe and sound. he has the whole world in his hands, and that’s never been enough. now he can sleep with a genuine smile on his face. he knows your body will regulate in a few months off the birth control—but that doesn’t mean he can’t get plenty of practice until then. after all, he has a problem! he has to breed his pretty little girl best friend turned future wife. 

[spence-whore]

I wonder if u might do a Spencer besties to lovers fic (:

‘Best Friends’

Spencer Agnew x Reader

a/n forewarning, i read through this like four times but i don’t have the time to heavily edit it. please overlook the mistakes lmao but i hope you guys like this one:)

Ever since your first day at Smosh, you have felt loved and important. They were like a huge family, just welcoming you in. There was one specific crew member that you grew close to and that was Spencer. Everyone was always giving the two of you shit because you were always glued to each other’s hips. They swore up and down that the two of you were going to pull a Courtney and Shayne but on the entire crew, announcing the fact that you and Spencer were together this entire time.

When in reality, he was just your best friend. You would give everything for it to be more than that but it never would turn out that way. He only sees you as his best friend, nothing more.

“Y/N!” Angela screamed while standing in front of your table. You were currently eating lunch while scrolling on your phone.

“Angela!” You attempted to scream back before giggling and almost choking on your chips.

“Your husband was looking for you.” Amanda announced while pulling up a chair beside you. You rolled your eyes and glared at her. “What did he want?” She just shrugged her shoulders and started to talking to Angela about the next shoot. Their rambling lasted for a good five minutes talking about some characters they were wanting to try out in Try Not to Laugh before you heard footsteps approaching from the corner.

You could immediately tell it was Spencer. You didn’t even have to turn your head to look and see who it was. “Hey Spice.” You said loudly while stuffing your mouth with more chips. Spice was some dumb inside joke, the two of you had from whenever you had to go get your wisdom teeth taken out. Spencer was the one to drop you off and pick you up. You could not get the name Spence out, you just kept calling him Spice.

“Another reason to add to the list of why I think they are soulmates. They can literally tell it is him walking up just from his footsteps. What the actual fuck?” Angela said to Amanda rolling her eyes.

“Hey short stack. I got you a coffee and a chocolate croissant from that one place you-“ He stopped talking for a minute while staring at you.

“What are you staring at me for?” You asked looking at him weirdly, mid stuffing your face with more chips.

“Isn’t that my hoodie?” Spencer asked while pointing towards the hoodie you have on. You had gotten cold and passed by his desk earlier. You noticed he had a hoodie thrown on his chair and figured, hey, he wouldn’t miss it?

You just smiled at him before grabbing the coffee and croissant. “You’ll have to pry it off my dead cold body before you can get it back. It’s comfortable and it smells like you.” You said before thinking about what you were saying and felt blush flooding your cheeks. “Wait, I mean it smells good.” You said really quickly while covering your mouth and looking at him and everyone else with a panicked look.

“I’m not complaining that you have it on. I was just wondering where it went earlier and literally told Shayne I bet that you had stole it. You look cute in it anyways. You can just bring it to me later whenever you come over.” He said with a faint smile on his face. “You still are on for tonight, right? For us to finish the next episode of Fallout?” He asked tilting his head while looking down at you, practically sliding down in your chair.

“Yup. I will be there.” You said real quickly, praying that the heat in your face will go away. He just nodded his head before smiling and walking away.

Angela, Amanda, and Courtney, who joined the table during the interaction, all stared at you while you tried playing it off as confused.

You just stared back at them, “What? Is there something on my face?” You asked while wiping at your face.

“Uh, nothing but the color red.” Courtney answered quickly before laughing and shaking her head. “When are you two going to admit the fact that you are head over heels for each other? It is so obvious.”

You could feel your face getting even redder while the three laughed over how much you’re practically melting due to the teasing. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. So, tell me more about the character you were wanting to test out during TNTL?” You asked.

A few hours passed by and it was time for you to leave and head over to Spencer’s place. You were walking out of the office whenever you bumped into Shayne.

“I heard you and Spencer are gonna attempt to finish up the rest of Fallout. How are you liking it so far?” Shayne asked walking aside you.

“It’s been pretty good. I never realized how much I enjoyed watching a show like this with someone else. It’s so fun to just watch something like that together and witness their reactions while the stuff is happening.” You explained while getting excited over the thought of hanging out with the man and eating snacks.

“I think you just like the idea of hanging out with Spencerrrrrrrrr.” Shayne said with a huge smile covering his face. “He’s really excited to hang out with you too. It is literally all I have heard about today.”

You started to complain whenever he first teased you until you heard him comment about Spencer being excited to see you as well.

The two of you had hit the parking lot and were about to separate. “What do you-“ Shayne cut you off before you could even finish. “Y/N, please stop acting like you can’t see it.” Shayne laughed before smiling at you. “Sorry, that sounded a bit harsh but everyone can see it and I’m pretty sure you can too. That guy is so hopelessly in love with you. You can’t tell me he isn’t.” You didn’t know what to say, you just stared at him.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Shayne said while giving a polite wave and walked off towards his car, where Courtney was waiting on him.

Some time passed by and you were finally walking up the steps to his house. Something about tonight felt different. For some reason tonight, you were nervous. It was just Spencer. He is your best friend, so you had no reason to be nervous. Shayne’s words were sticking in your head though. Any other time, it wouldn’t get to your head but man it was really fucking with you tonight.

You had a spare key to his house, so you just unlocked the door and walked in. “Hoooooneeey, I’m hooooooome.” You yelled trying, trying to not giggle.

“Hey Y/N.” You just hear Spencer respond and see him pop his head around the corner. “I’m just changing into comfier clothes. You can go onto the living room.”

All you could think was weird. He usually carries on with your comments whenever you enter his house.

You just thought, maybe he was tired. So, you tried thinking nothing of it and headed into his living room. You got situated on his couch and started pulling up the next episode of Fallout.

“I put your hoodie on the counter.” You nodded towards the kitchen area while forcing a smile at him. He just nodded his head okay and sat down beside you.

Spencer is usually the touchy type of friend. He is always touching you in some way, either it grabbing your legs and throwing them over his, arm against yours, something like that. Tonight was different though. He had a distance between the two of you.

“You ready to start?” He asked before nodding towards the TV and you just nodded your head yes.

It was killing you. There was something going on and you couldn’t tell what. It was like there was a blanket of thick tension laying over the two of you. You would look at him out of the corner of your eye and catch him glancing over at you. He would catch you looking over at him then looking back at the TV. It was starting to drive you insane, so you had to speak up.

You grabbed the remote and paused the show. “What is going on?” You asked while turning towards him.

“What are you talking about? We’re at the part where-“ You realized he was about to explain the part of the episode, so you cut him off. “No, what is going on with you? You seem upset tonight.”

He looked at you then stared at the TV for a few minutes. You sat in silence as well, thinking maybe he needed it till the silence got deafening.

“Spencer? I don’t understand? Any other night we hang out, we’re always cracking jokes with each other and talking about our days and tonight-“

It was like it happened within a flash.

Spencer turned to face you while you were talking and you thought he was turning to listen to whatever you were about to say. You couldn’t be further than wrong.

He grabs both sides of your face and cuts you off. “Can I kiss you?”

It was like all of the words immediately got stuck in your throat and you just stared at him in shock. He started laughing over the way your face starts getting red in his hands. “What?” was all you managed to squeak out.

He inched a little closer to you, “Trevor was calling me an idiot for not realizing how much you like me. At first, I thought he was ignorant, of course. I thought there is no way they would have the same feelings. I, then, remembered how you acted earlier today over the hoodie and the comment about liking how I smell. It was like something just clicked. You also blush anytime we have an interaction. I could be wrong and if I am, I’m so sorry for butchering this friendship, Y/N, but can I please just kiss you already?”

You couldn’t even get words out. All you could do was shake your head yes and immediately, it was like all of the words left your head. He didn’t do the stereotypical ‘starved’ kiss that happens with the friends to lovers trope. He just softly pressed his lips against yours while pulling you closer to him by your face.

This lasted for a minute before he slowly pulled back. Your hands immediately fell to his wrists that were under your chin and you both just stared at each other.

“Your face is probably the reddest I have ever seen it. I’m going to assume everyone was right?”

You just smacked him on the chest and then wrapped your hand around his neck and pulled him close to you, “Yes, you dork.” You kissed him again but didn’t last long before he pulled back again.

“Wait, mentioning earlier… I wanted to ask, so you like the way I smell?” He says with a stupid grin on his face and wiggling his eyebrows.

“Oh for fucks sake, just kiss me again already Spencer.”

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Must you, Japan? has become Thank You, Japan

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

BL OLYMPICS! Week 3

This is my last week of passing out metals in various sporting events, as part of the weekly updates.

Aug 2024 Week 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

Century of Love (Weds Gaga) eps 9-10fin - There were a lot more unnecessary dramatic speeches than there was practical medical aid being administered. Very extra, boys. I wonder how long it took them to get that "birds meet hug" shot? Meanwhile, great grandpa‘s attitude that he knows best in every way is thoroughly annoying, and yet absolutely appropriate to his age. My great gramps (RIP), had he had the body of a 20-year-old, would behave in exactly the same self-righteous know-it-all way. The doctor is great. I would like him to get his own romance please? What happens when you are the villain in someone else's reincarnation story? There's a whole fanfic there. And yes I cried. I am a sap for this kinda thing.

Final thoughts:

This is a great little show about a young man who fell in love with a pretty girl 100 years ago, and when she died in his arms, he was cursed to live until he could meet her reborn self. Only this time around, she’s reborn into the body of a man. I love it when Thailand gets all up in its own historical business and reincarnation and shizz. I like this pair (it’s not DaouOffroad’s fault I didn’t enjoy most of their first series.) Daou’s wushu is pretty snazzy and we got a fun meet cute. (Erm... Remeet cute? Meet cute 2.0?) Plus this is a very PRETTY show. Despite some ham handed comedy moments, this ultimately has more in common with something like I Feel You Linger in the Air meets First Love Again, then (as one might expect) Until We Meet Again or The Director Who Buys Me Dinner. The leads turned in great performances, although Daou outclassed everybody else on that screen. It’s a good story and a great BL. I’m not sure this is going in my rewatch rotation, but I can’t find any major faults with it beyond a certain level of camp that is sadly endemic to lackorns. Also I’m going to give it credit as the kind of BL that one could safely recommend to lovers of melodrama and historical romance, without having to qualify it as “good for a BL.” It was, to put it succinctly, simply a VERY ENJOYABLE show. 

Under those auspices I really can’t give it anything less than a 9/10. 

Bronze in Fencing

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 10 of 12 - It’s cute. They were cute. I enjoyed it a lot. I talk quite a bit about why they're using nai as a you pronoun here:

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans (Fri iQIYI) ep 6 of 8 - Honestly the side couple is truly stellar in this show. I wasn’t sure about them at first but now I absolutely love them. Not sure how they are going to resolve such intense dislike (from JJ) by the end of the series. But I’m interested to see them try.

Meanwhile, there isn’t anything else airing right now that makes me laugh as much as the behind-the-scenes from this show. Highly recommended.

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) eps 1-2 of 12 - Oh it is so much fun. I’m particularly delighted that our musician is a drummer and I don’t have to listen to him sing... I hope. I’ve been waiting for Big to lead a BL forever. I’m disposed to enjoy this. We can all be confident in one thing, the kisses are going to be great. I like the side couple too, very indulgent daddy. While I am disturbed by the tortoise in the tiny tank, I love the extrovert friendship group. They remind me of my own college crew. It is a cute premise, but I will need them to actually be together in the same room, looking longingly at each other a smooching within the next couple of episodes.

YouTube served me both episodes 1 & 2, and I don’t think it was meant to. So this may be next week's review as well.

The Trainee (Sun YouTube) ep 6 of 12 - I wasn’t wild about this ep or where this show is going. But I enjoyed the language play. 

Gold in Linguistic Gymnastics

(my new favorite sport)

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - Wow. Sam admitted it just out loud like that! Right after a betrayal? Balls on that boy. Worked on Yo tho. Too well, actually. I wish Yo had made him suffer and dragged him over the coals for a while. But I guess Yo really really likes him back. Meanwhile, the GL side plot also moved quite rapidly. A lot happened in this episode.

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 4 of 12 - Them ALL jumping into the water was totally ridiculous. It’s still a little slow, because it is a pulp, but I’m rather enjoying it.

Knock Knock Boys (Thurs Gaga) ep 12fin - Almond and Latte were cute. The breakfast with the four of them was funny. I did laugh a lot. Almond getting "first time" advice from his two resident gay dads (or at least trying to) was super sweet. Also I got a lot of smiley kisses. Nice final ep.

Ultimately how do I feel about this show?

A story about 4 boys of differing personalities who end up living together and pair up, falling in love. Slow moving and waffling, with some artificially generated family drama makes this a classic Thai pulp except that in general it's a smiley kiss of a show. It had plenty of good qualities like great communication and sexual rep (including toys, first time, safe sex, and sexual identities). The heat levels were on point and well executed, and the performances were good. It’s just that the script and the directing were lackluster, rendering it ultimately forgettable. Still, fine on a rainy afternoon with some camomile tea or whatever. 7/10 

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 9 of 10 - I’m getting some sort of PTSD from this show, It is making me feel like I’m the problem. Trash watch

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Cosmetic Playlover (Japan Tues Gaga) eps 1-2 of 8 - Anyone surprised by this jump in the standings? Yeah, probubly not. Anygay... this show is GREAT. Warped af but great. Lemme try to explain.

I actually said out loud during ep 1, "Well this is boundary pushing." By which I mean mine and everybody elses. But it’s Japan, *checks watch* it’s about time they turned out something edging into unpalatable and kinky. And because it’s Japan, I’m more forgiving than I would be were this show nested in the clumsy hands of say... Thailand. So actually this being me, and me being of questionable taste, I’m enjoying this show a lot.

You want me to list the ways? Sure.

Younger seme with grabby hands.

The younger one identified the elder gay as his personal property and it’s now: single motivation, on target, against all odds.

Uke cares about his work and not much else.

Seme cares about the uke and not much else.

Uke is gonna make this boy WORK for it.

That one particularly Japanese style of obsession that I actually adore.

Passes the sniff test!

I’m being reminded of that KBL Love Mate. Which I believe I enjoyed but no one else did. For exactly this set of tropes. Only Japan is better suited to handle them. For me this is a case of:

Must you,Japan? = Oh yes? Well, thank you very much, Japan.  

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 8 of 10 - enter the evil girl character. Yawn.

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 6 of 10 - It is what it is. 

It's airing but...

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 2 of 12 - I did not catch ep 2 before they took it down from USA YT. I don’t know why it’s down. Either they got a deal for distribution off YouTube or there’s some sort of scandal. Frankly, I wasn't particularly impressed with ep 1 so I’m not rabid to find wherever it’s gone or why. Still, perhaps someone will let us know the sitch in a comment? It's a me problem. I'm figuring it out.

Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun ????) 10 eps - OMG a uni student who looks too young and a... COP. GAH. The subversion and kink of it all. Why can't I find it? Do I have to go grey?

4 Minutes (Thai Netflix/Grey) - A rich boy at uni suddenly gains the supernatural power to see four minutes into the future. I have a source, but I've decided to hold off and binge if it ends okay, since it's only 8 eps. I depend upon y'all to tell me if it's safe.

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - it's your funeral (or, more likely, one of the main characters'). You can argue but... statistics. You know my feelings on this matter. MY BLOG, remember?

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer IS COMING IN SEPTEMBER!!!! (Yeah this is gonna sit here until then)

Next Week Looks Like This:

Ooo, nice spread.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming This Month!

8/12 First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) 12 eps - About a singer with stage fright and his timid fan stars Charles (H4 the puppy one) and Michael Chang (the youngster in My Tooth Your Love), plus side couple featuring a Thai actor Jame (Koh in Gen Y) and Liu Min Ting (of Guardian fame). What a damn tean. I can't wait. With thier powers combined!

8/13 Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues YT) 10 eps - supposedly Jinlo with air this on their YT channel. Stars August (Love Sick) so I'm excited despite Jinlo's poor reputation. From the trailer it looks like it's following the original pretty closely... just Thai style. GIMMEEEEE!!!!

8/16 The Last Time (Thai Fri YT) ? eps - Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something.

8/22 The On1y One (Taiwan Thurs Gaga) 12 eps - announced in 2023 this one has a high school set stepbrothers trope and is reputed to be high heat. From Taiwan! It's made for me. Based on a novel Mou Mou from the Your Name Engraved Herein folks, so it could go dark. Still, I'm very excited.

8/22 The Paradise of Thorns (Thai movie) theater release - Jeff Satur is back but this does not look like a BL (the gay lover's death is the inciting event). More in Goodbye Mother vein. Looks dark and dramatic. He opposite and extremely well known actor Toey Pongsakorn who has never done gay before.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENT

Linguistic flirting trope! One of my all time favorites. FANTASTIC. (I did keep hearing Gun yelling Papiiiiiii! in my head tho.)

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

[winterrrnight]

midsommar with bsf!Rafe and reader who at a certain point sneak out and start reminiscing how they would always do the same when their were little.

I'm in love with the way you write them, I'm truly in awe at the level of intimacy you can create with those two. expect so many more asks from me because I'm hooked and ilyyy

since we’ve now established this is the sweet sweet🦉anon, I really love this req (and all the other ones you sent) so so much 💘🥹✨ I loved writing this sooo much and I hope you like it tooooo xx thank you so so much for your sweet words I love you from the bottom of my heart 🥹

bsf!rafe who sneaks out of midsummer with you for some alone time… <3 listen to sexy to someone by clairo, cause, well, it’s clairo!!!! <3 cw: suggestive content (as always, no smut!), mentions of skinny dipping, weed consumption, references to canon events from the midsummer episode in S1 <3 for @ladyinbl00d who today absolutely made my day with her beautiful words and who was also honored with the sneak peek to this 🤭 i love u davi you’re my whole world 🤍

part of this little universe <3

it’s that time of the year again; peak hotness accompanies the sixth month of the year, as everyone dress up and come together for the awaited holiday: midsummer.

you are accompanying rafe; as you always do for this holiday, your arm looped into his as you both walk out along with the rest of the camerons. both of you are adorned in matching shades of baby blue, and you have a little flower crown fixed on the top of your head. rafe passes you a small smile as he leads you along with his family, everyone around you all clapping and cheering for the most powerful family on the island.

the celebrations continue to happen around you, and in between you and rafe get separated; him going with his friends for some ‘business’ (you caught the air that he got JJ kicked out), and you with your friends just simply talking and chatting, sipping away on your mocktail.

amidst your conversation with your friends, you feel an all too familiar hand brush your side, slowly trailing under the slit of your dress to gently graze your bare thigh. you feel him breathing down on your neck, and for a second, just for a second, you feel yourself completely lifted away from the conversation with your friends – but you quickly ground yourself back.

“hey,” he says softly into your ear. the conversation between your friends doesn’t essentially stop; this isn’t a rare sight for them.

“hey,” you murmur, rafe’s arms now wrapping firmly around your waist from behind, his chin resting on the crook of your neck.

“come with me,” he says softly, pressing the most subtle kiss behind your ear. his tone isn’t a request and it’s also not a command; but you know there is absolutely no room for argument. you give him a nod of your head and excuse yourself from your friends and follow him out, him making sure no one, especially his dad catch you both leaving.

he leads you to the nearby beach which is almost completely empty as everyone is gathered for midsummer, where you both sit down next to each other on the sand, the waves lapping up till your feet under the darkness of the night sky.

a breeze blows past you two as you both sit silently next to each other on the beach, the sound of the waves filling your ears. you hear the flick of a lighter and turn your head to rafe to see him lighting up a weed joint, watching the momentary golden glow. he hands you the joint after taking a hit himself, and you take a deep drag, blowing out a plume of smoke after that.

“I fuckin’ hate midsummers,” rafe mutters, as you pass him the joint and he takes a hit. “all that attention to my dad, everyone is always asking me when i’m going to start at the company… same bullshit each time. I’m so sick of it.” he takes another hit of the joint, letting out a cloud of smoke before turning his attention to you. “but this…” he says, his voice now starting to take on a softer tone as his fingers curl around yours, “this is the only good thing each time.”

you smile softly at him, squeezing his hand back as he hands you the joint back and you take a hit. he watches you intently; watches how your lips wrap around the end of the joint, how you take a deep drag, and how you let the smoke roll off your tongue releasing it into the air. he takes your intertwined hand and presses a soft kiss to the back of your knuckles.

“thank you for coming with me, seriously,” he murmurs, pressing another kiss to the back of your hand before letting it go.

“of course,” you smile, handing him the joint back. “there’s nothing you have to thank me for,”

rafe acknowledges your smile with one of his own before hitting the joint. a beat of silence passes over you two before rafe speaks up again.

“I love how we do this each time,” he says with a smile, the joint dangling in between his lips, “this sneaking away from everyone. right now, my dad must be giving some lame ass speech using words like ‘power’ and ‘integrity’, and will smother all his love on ms. sarah there, and everyone would practically be eating out of his hand.” he snorts, shaking his head. “it’s nice to get away from that suffocating place to get a breather. you’re the only one who understands.”

you scoot closer to him and rest your head on his shoulder, and his hand comes to rest on your thigh right under the slit, where he gently traces small circles against your flesh, his touch almost featherlight.

“you remember when we sneaked out from the celebration the first time?” you start. “we were, what, 8? and your dad was so desperate to make you meet all his business associates but your little antisocial ass was just not having it,”

he lets out a chuckle at your words, nodding. he pulls the joint from his lips and slots it in between yours. “I had more than enough of business talk that night. and you were the only one who caught the look of uncomfort on my face. you helped me sneak out from there and we came right to this beach, and we shared a pack of sour patch kids.”

you laugh softly at the memory, letting out some smoke before holding the joint between your fingers. “yeah,” you say. “and it just became a tradition over the years. we used to share candy, and now we’re sharing a weed joint. we really leveled up our game huh?”

rafe chuckles with you, both of your laughters mixing together in a symphony just like they always have all these years. “we certainly did,” he says. “I’m proud of us you know?” he teases, his fingers continuing to trace circles on your thigh.

“I am too,” you grin, taking a hit of the joint again.

“but my favorite one was when we were 18,” he says. “when we went skinny dipping in the water,”

you laugh at that, nodding. “that was… that was really something huh?” you murmur, getting comfortable against his shoulder.

“mhm,” he hums softly, looking at your head resting on his shoulder, and leaning down to kiss your temple softly. “it was really good,” he murmurs.

you look up at him, your eyes flicking down to his lips for just a second before going back up to his eyes. “you know…” you start speaking, and you can feel the subtle start of the influence of the thc over your thoughts, “i wouldn’t mind doing that again,” you whisper.

rafe looks down at you and catches your subtle glance at his lips. “you wouldn’t?” he whispers back, a smirk starting to slowly pull his lips.

a coy smile spreads on your face and you shake your head. “I wouldn’t, no,” you murmur.

the small smirk on his face turns to a full grin as his fingers reach out to your shoulder, trailing over the strap of your dress. he starts to slowly tug it down, the strap now hanging off your shoulder. rafe feels his heart starting to thump in his chest, and he knows, oh he just knows what the night has in store for you two.

“well then…” he mumbles, leaning down to press the softest kiss on your exposed shoulder.

“... what are we waiting for?”

[httpdwaekki]

soft raven | b.c.

summary: channie comes to visit you while you paint your nails, turning into you painting his nails.

wc: 2.4k

a/n: idk how i feel about this but i wrote it a while ago but channie's part to my nail painting series woo! also please pretend one of those nail polish bottles are black because i cannot for the life of me find a picture of black nail polish that isn’t on nails that matches the aesthetic LMAO. i hope you all enjoy, remember to eat, drink water and take your meds, ily <3

please consider donating to this fundraiser!

minho | changbin | hyunjin | jisung | felix | seungmin | jeongin

(photos are not mine! credit to owners!)

you were sat at your desk, glasses slipping down your nose, headphones sat atop your head. you had one headphone pushed behind your ear as your monitor displayed a random adventure time episode. you had various nail polishes displayed in front of you, deciding which combo you wanted to do. 

unbeknownst to you, chan was leaning against the door frame, watching the internal debate play out as your eyes dart to each color. he had been in his office/studio working on a few tracks while you were keeping yourself entertained at your desk, playing games with felix, watching shows, etc.

 now you were having a creative war in your brain, trying to come up with unique color combinations and patterns. chan stayed there for a moment, heart swelling with love and overwhelming adoration. he watched as pick out different colors, tongue sticking out slightly as you examined the bottles carefully.

he pushes off the door frame, walking up to you, placing his arms on the back of your chair,. you felt movement behind you causing you to look at the culprit. you smile, pushing up your glasses, “hi bub.” turning your attention back to the small bottles filled with every color of the rainbow.

“what are you doing, bug?” he asks, leaning against your chair, glancing over your shoulder. “i’m trying to decide what color i wanna paint my nails.” you moved to lean back against your chair, causing the aussie boy behind you to shift, wrapping his arms around you.

you lean your head back, lips pursed, silently asking for a kiss. he smiles before placing a sweet kiss to your soft lips. you pull apart before looking forward, leaning your head against one of his arms wrapped around you. “ can i pick out your colors?” he asks, staring at the miscellaneous colorful bottles.

your cheeks warm, “you want to?” he nods, before releasing you, moving to grab your old chair in the corner of the room, pulling it up to your desk. you scoot over, giving him space to slide in next to you.

he becomes serious, analyzing each bottle individually, before grabbing two colors, a rich, inky black and a soft, light purple. you look at him with waiting eyes, he sat there looking at the colors for a moment before he looks over to you. his signature side smile, dimple on full display as he slides the two bottles to you.

“these two?” you ask, grabbing the bottles out of his hand. he nods, “can we try something?” you hum, prompting him to continue. “so i saw a video of a girl getting her nails done and she got her nails done one color and then painted her pinky black.” you nod, turning towards him. 

“and then she painted her boyfriends nails and she painted all of them black and then painted his pinky the color she painted her nails.” he finished shyly, looking down at the two bottles in your hand. “so you want to paint my nails with the purple and then my pinky black and then i’ll do the opposite for you?”

you watch as chan’s cheeks slightly reddened as he lightly nods. you giggle, placing your hand on his cheek. “that’s so cute baby, i’d love to do that with you.” you quickly kiss his cheek before letting out a happy squeal.

you shake your arms in excitement before turning back to your desk, you take off your head phones, placing them on your monitor. you quickly put all of the other colorful bottles away where they belong before grabbing all the things you need to prep his nails. you had already prepped yours since you were planning on painting them anyway. 

you look back over to the aussie boy next to you,` looking at you with pure adoration, falling more and more in love with you. “what?” you ask, looking at him with big eyes. he smiles, shaking his head, “nothing, what you got there?” he points to the various tools you set out.

you explain each one as you grab the nail polish remover and some cotton pads. “so the stick is gonna push back your cuticles and the clippers are gonna trim them before i use the nail polish remover to remove any oil on your nails.” he listened intently as you explained each item.

“okay so here’s the question, do you want to paint my nails or do you want me to do both?” you ask looking back to him. “maybe you do both this time and i’ll watch and then next time i’ll do your’s.” you nod before grabbing the towel you use specifically for doing your nails.

you lay the towel out in front of him before grabbing his hands and placing one on the fabric, keeping the other in your hand. “okay, i’m gonna clean your nails quick and then i’ll start painting.” he nods before looking at the screen in front of you, the cartoon still playing on the screen.

you notice this, placing his hand on your thigh before grabbing the headphones, “here.” you whisper, gently placing the headphones over his ears. he looks over at you with a pout. “what’s wrong bubba?” you ask, small smile making it’s way on your lips at his cute antics.

“now i can’t hear you.” he whined, his pout somehow bigger. you giggle before pushing back one of the speakers off his ear. “better?” you ask. he immediately smiles before turning his attention back to the animated jake and finn in front of you. you smile to yourself as start pushing back his cuticle.

“if it hurts please let me know, i don’t want to hurt you okay?” you look up to him, catching the slight nod as he was already engrossed in the show. you smile at your boyfriend before going back to work.

you push each cuticle back with care and precision before placing his hand on the towel before grabbing the other, repeating the process. you place his second hand back on the towel before grabbing the first and the clippers.  “try to stay still okay? i don’t wanna cut you.” he looks over after hearing your serious tone.

he smiles, giving you a firm nod before turning back to the screen. you slowly make your way around each finger, mindful not to get anywhere close to his skin. you finish the first hand once again moving to the second before repeating the process once again.

you put his hand back onto the desk, before grabbing the base coat, shaking the bottle. the movement caught chan’s attention, “oh what’s that? base coat?” he asks, looking at the bottle of clear polish in your hands. you nod your head, humming and you unscrew the brush from the bottle.

you place the bottle on the desk before putting your hand out, waiting for him to place his in yours. he gives you his hand, returning his attention to the screen, fully engrossed in the animations.

you paint each nail with precision, tongue poking out in concentration. after you finish the first hand, you place it back on the towel before tapping his other hand causing him to move the  second one towards you, eyes glued to the screen. you can’t help but look at him with pure adoration, the way he looks captivated by the show while fully trusting you to do whatever you want to his nails.

your cheeks warm before you grab his hand, painting each nail with the clear polish. you placed his hand back down, screw the brush back into place, turning your attention to the screen as you wait for his nails to dry. luckily you refuse to watch anything without subtitles so you were able to follow along easily.

you lay your head on his shoulder, placing an arm on his thigh, drawing random shapes on the soft skin. you feel him place a long loving kiss on your head before laying his on this same spot. you both stay like that for a moment, enjoying each other’s presence.

after a few minutes you gently tap his thigh, signaling him to move. he let out a small whine before moving, looking at you with a pout. “don’t give me that look, mister.” you scold him playfully. “you’re the one that asked me to paint your nails.” he mimics you before huffing, turning back to the screen.

“hey.” you whine, catching his attention. once he turned to you, it was your turn to pout, his eyes softened immediately “that was mean.” your frown deepens, jokingly crossing your arms. “oh baby, i’m sorry.” he coos, attempting to apologize. you turn your head the other way, nose up, egging him on.

“my bug, please.” he begs, you can only assume his puppy dog eyes are on full display. when you don’t react he brings out the big guns. he scoots his chair impossibly closer to you while pulling you closer to him. “sweetheart, please.” he begs, grabbing your arm, entwining your fingers before bringing your hand to his lips, placing a sweet kiss to the back of it.

you look over at him, actively fighting the smile attempting to make its way onto your face. “come on sweetheart, you know i was just playing.” he says, his voice dripping with sweetness. you can feel your face getting warm as you cave. “that’s not fair.” you grumble, pulling your hand away, causing him to pull back, scooting away slightly.

“what’s not fair, sweetheart?” he asks, feigning innocence. you glare at him. “you know what, don’t play coy.” you accuse, scooting your chair back into the desk. you glance over catching the sly smirk gracing his lips, fully aware of the effect that pet name has on you.

you roll your eyes, small smile on your lips as you grab the bottle filled with the dark polish. you shake it quickly as chan settles next to you, placing his hands back on the towel. you unscrew the brush, placing it on the desk and take one of his hands before painting each nail.

taking even more time than you did with the previous clear coat. taking extra care to make sure each nail is coated perfectly with no streaks and nothing on the surrounding skin. after painting the first four with the darker shade before grabbing the lighter, lavender shade, painting his pinky with the same caution.

after finishing the first coat you repeat the same careful process with his other hand. your tongue starts poking out as your concentration increases, fully committed to the task at hand. so committed you didn’t realize chan had abandoned watching the nostalgic cartoon to watch you meticulously paint each nail with care.

you continue to repeat the process for a second coat, ensuring the color would but rich and vibrant. it’s only when you finish painting his second pinky purple that you notice his stare. you lay his hand back on the towel before looking over to him, realizing he’d been staring at you, causing you to do a double take.

“what?” you ask, pushing up your glasses that were slipping down your nose, tilting your head to the side. his cheeks redden slightly, before smiling and shaking his head. “nothing.” he looks down at his nails, his smile getting impossibly bigger. “it looks so good bug, thank you.” you smile.

“i’m glad you like them.” you say before grabbing the top coat giving it a shake. “alright i’m gonna give that a few minutes to dry then i’ll put on the top coat. and then once that’s dry you’ll be all set.” he nods, turning his attention back to the cartoon.

you place the clear bottle on your desk before scooting slightly closer to him and the desk. you relax back in your chair, placing your arm on his back, hand landing in his hair, lightly scratching his scalp. he lets out a hum of satisfaction, leaning his head back into your hand like a cat.

a few minutes pass and you decide it’s time to apply the top coat. you sit up, taking your hand out of his hair, shaking the bottle once more. you hear a whine coming from beside you. “what’s wrong?” you ask, looking over him.

he pouts before letting out a yawn. “i was almost asleep.” he say through the yawn. “well let me finish this quick then we can go lay down okay?” he nods, before yawning once more. you made quick work of coating each nail with the clear polish. “ alright sleepy head, you’re all done.” you screw the top back on, gathering all your tools and paints, putting them away neatly.

“what about your nails?” he asks through a yawn once more. “i’ll do them tomorrow, right now i think it’s time for bed.” you say, taking the headphones off his head, running your hand through his soft hair. he gives you an understanding hum, before closing his eyes.

you place your headphones in their respective place before closing all your tabs and shutting off the colorful pc. you stand up, chan following closely behind. “just be mindful of your nails okay? the top coat is still wet.” you warn helping him up before pushing the chair back to the corner. he comes up behind you, placing his arms around your waist, chin on your shoulder before following you out of the room.

you flip the light off as you walk out, making your way to your shared bedroom. you switch on your bedside lamp before you round the bed to your sleepy boy’s side, giving his arm a tap, signaling him to let go. once he lets go, you move the blankets, giving him space to lay down. 

he sits down, moving to get under the covers with your help. “careful bubba.” you remind him, as he settles into the soft mattress. he lifts his hands as you move the blanket to cover him. you round the bed sliding under the blankets before putting adventure time on the tv and turning off the light.

chan opens his arms for you to lay in, burrowing into his chest, getting comfy. “i love you, sweetheart.” he mumbled, kissing your head before letting out another yawn. “i love you too, channie.” you say, placing a kiss above his heart as his breathing evens out, taking him into dreamland as you follow slowly behind him.

do not repost

[juuuulez]

🎧 | are we still friends?, michael berzatto.

don’t get green skin (green skin), keep contact (keep contact) / don’t say, "goodbye, smell you later" (bye, later) / nah, i can't / i don't want to end this season on a bad episode.

writing this was really fucking brutal for me. i’ll do something nice and sweet another time because this was rooouuughh.

Established Mikey/You, platonic Richie/You, generally just sad stuff.

request a playlist roulette here!

Being with Mikey was warm. That’s the only way you could describe it. Warm in the way he’d look at you, the way he smiled, laughed. His tendency to touch everyone. Kisses on cheeks and hugs from the side. You wanted that in your life, you welcomed it, warmth and love.

But now it’s cold and the cold is biting. It’s harsh and relentless, seeping through layers of black silk, penetrating the nice coat you bought for this occasion. The cigarette between your lips flares with each inhale, a reddened spark you cup your hands over, in futile hopes that it’ll give off heat. It doesn’t.

“Nice shoes.” You remark the second they’re in your vision, black and shiny. It’s not like you look up, either, staring down at the pavement and Richie’s pointed dress shoes. But you know it’s him: you can smell his cologne mixing with the smoke in the air, creating a scent that’s harsh and bitter but seemingly appropriate.

“Thanks,” He mutters, following your gaze. “Tiff bought ‘em.”

You want to make fun of him. Make some stupid remark, berate him for folding so easily, for doing what she says with no complaint. It’s what you would’ve done, what Mikey would’ve done: Lettin’ her make you pretty, huh? What— you gonna be wearing lipstick next? It’s so close yet so far, you can basically hear it, and you’re sure Richie can hear it too.

“She around here?” You end up asking instead.

And Richie shakes his head, already lighting up a cigarette. “Had to go relieve Eva’s babysitter. Some fuckin’ thirteen year-old from our street.”

“Yeah, well, one day she’s gonna be that thirteen year-old.”

The silence settles between you again, thick but not suffocating. Just there. You’re fine to leave it that way, you’ve been standing here regardless, leaning against a brick wall in the parking lot across from the funeral home. Five cigarette butts have fallen to your feet, and you intend on adding to the pile.

“Heading home after this?” Richie asks.

You don’t look up because you don’t want to see the look on his face. Worry. You hate worry, because you lived in worry. A perpetual fear, an anxiety settled deep in your gut, making your skin tingle and itch. But Mikey never seemed to mind; he taught you not to worry, to laugh more, to care less.

Look where that got you.

“Dunno,” You shrug, dropping the cigarette butt to the floor. It sizzles on some residual snow, which you squish down under your nice heels. “Was gonna try and back out of the lease.”

“Thought you loved that place?” Richie is quick to counter, “Y’know, green tiles and whatnot.”

It was a little apartment, one you’d found after hours of hunting. The green backsplash in the bathroom had caught your attention, and you’d spent days chatting anyone’s ear off about how you’d style it.

But now you shrug it off, appearing indifferent. “It’s not that big a deal.”

It’d been five weeks. Five weeks of domestic bliss, or, your equivalent to that. Of finding little trinkets and unique homewares to furnish the new place. Of getting excited after work, because you get to come home to your boyfriend, instead of an empty bed.

Boxes were still shoved into most corners of the place, not yet unpacked. For a moment you wondered if that was the intention. That, in not unpacking, Mikey was saving you the grief of eventually removing his presence from your place. He was making it easier, cutting out the middleman.

“Maybe Chicago isn’t for me.”

The words slip from your mouth before you can stop them, and you’ve finally looked up, meeting Richie’s gaze. It’s odd because he’s looking at you, and not at the same thing, like his mind is elsewhere. You get it. Your mind is also elsewhere.

“Fuckin’ stupid,” He mutters, shaking his head. “That’s bullshit and you know it.”

So you shrug, another cigarette pinched between your teeth. You don’t remember lighting it. This weird haze has you on autopilot, you’ve been in it all morning. Maybe all week.

“I dunno. Might be good to get away for a bit.” You try to justify.

“Nah, fuck that. You’re not goin’ all alien on us,” Richie continues to contest. “There are people here for you. Y’know.. Tina ‘n all the cooks, and fuckin’.. fucking Fak, and Nat.”

“Natalie said—“

“I know what she fuckin’ said, it’s bullshit.”

Richie flicks out his cigarette, letting it drop into your little pile. His jacket is ironed and those shiny shoes are covered in snow, and for the first time in ages, he looks nice. You notice it. You notice the effort he’s put in, despite everything, and you know he feels the way you do.

“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” He begins. “You’re gonna come to The Beef once a week. Eat a sandwich, talk to us, ‘n shit. And you’re gonna come to family, too. Always.”

There’s a grimace on your face at the idea. Stepping foot in the restaurant seems like a colossal task, let alone attending family. Because that’s the thing, you weren’t family, not anymore. You’d hoped that one day you would be, for certain, a Berzatto. And now that wouldn’t happen.

“I’ll try.” You end up saying, even if dread builds in your stomach. It’s the most you can do.

Richie seems to understand, letting the silence linger for another moment. “C’mon,” He sighs. “We’re getting a drink. I’m gonna pull one smile outta you tonight.”

The notion of smiling, today, seems foreign. Yet you obey regardless, following along as Richie’s hand finds your back, and he swipes the cigarette from your mouth to throw into the snow.

It ends up being a good night. As good as it can be, at least. Each memory shared, each story told is laced with an underlying bitterness, something that settles on your tongue and behind your eyes. It’s thick and equally cold as the air; prickling like goosebumps. Richie feels it too. Everyone does, but you convince yourself that it’s not forever, that it’ll go away and the warmth will return.

[xthescarletbitch]

Do take requests? If you're willing it'd be nice if you could write the ladies of bg3 on the recieving end of a strap on for us tops? It's hard to find content for us Minthara loving tops and I like your writing 😭. We're starving!!

i'm technically not taking requests for bg3 at the moment, but i couldn't resist. thank you so much for your kind words. i hope these are to your liking. <3

bg3 ladies receiving the strap (x reader)

18+, minors do NOT interact

cw: reader!giving strap-on

word count: 1700+

author’s note: i'm experimenting with formats at the moment, and i think this one is becoming a favourite (making it pretty is also a lot of work so i am refraining this time lol). also, i struggled with karlach's. i'm sorry in advance.

lae'zel

lae’zel generally likes to take your strap the same way she gives it: rough. on those occasions, she’ll urge you to pick up the pace and fuck her good, even wrapping her legs around you to pull you in deeper.  “say please,” you tease, showing her that you’re the one in control.  it’s a risky game to tease a githyanki, but you know that she’ll relent–you’re the one with the strap attached to your hips, after all. you have the option to give her exactly what she wants if she chooses to comply. “chk,” she grunts, going over the options in her head. as if deeming the circumstances worthy of this very rare word, she mutters under her breath: “please.” you slow down, getting a bit theatric with the next words that leave your mouth: “please, what?” you can see her expression go from one of frustration to one of desperation. she needs this. you smirk, knowing that she’ll give in. “please,” she pauses, astonished that she’s actually begging for something. “please fuck me harder.” your smirk grows as you lift one of her legs over your shoulder, picking up the pace and giving her exactly what she begged for. the erotic sounds leaving her mouth only prove that you’re doing an excellent job… that, and the claw marks on your hips. she’ll never speak a word of it to anyone, but lae’zel also enjoys the slower, more passionate episodes of sex. she relishes in the moments of your bodies slowly grinding together, a pool of sweat shared between the two, your heartbeats in sync as the tempo remains consistently moderate. she wants her hands in yours as you stare deeply into her eyes, giving her the kind of strokes that make them roll back. words of affirmation are definitely welcomed here–she likes to hear that she’s taking you so well.  lae’zel isn’t satisfied until she has came at least three times from your strap. she wants to be soaked in sweat, covered in marks, and out of breath by the time you’re done. it takes a lot to tire this githyanki out, but she makes it so worth it with her beautiful reactions. when she reaches that final orgasm–when she can’t possibly take it anymore–she’ll grip your shoulders with a passion, pulling you close to her, groaning in your ear as she is taken over that edge. her legs will shake before giving out under you as the mess between her legs gets all over her thighs.

minthara

minthara makes it clear that you should earn the right to fuck her with the strap, turning it into a little game. the little game usually involves you eating her out until she’s wet enough to take you. what she won’t tell you is that the end result will always be the same: she’ll gladly let you take the lead. while she does love topping you on multiple occasions, she also enjoys it the other way around. she can’t help the small smile that comes across her face when you offer to top her. she’ll stand there envisioning the scene in front of her, hoping you take no mercy on her.  it should be said that she won’t be silent–and i mean that in terms of the sultry sounds coming from her mouth, as well as the string of commands that she’ll throw at you. it is really hard for her to just sit there and take it, and sometimes it becomes a game of power and control–one you’ll happily play. “faster,” she directs, grabbing hold of your hips and aiding you in doing so.  it is at that moment that you move your hands to be on top of hers, quickly grabbing and pinning them above her head. she’ll smirk and try to wiggle free, but you don’t allow her to. you make it clear that you’re the one calling the shots right now, not her. she loves the power struggle and won’t fight you too much. she’ll just note the incident for when she fucks you next. the struggle continues, and she loves every moment of it. sure, being in control is fun and standard for her, but there’s something exciting about letting another person take the reins. her favourite display of power on your part is when you tie her up or use other means to restrain her. she goes crazy for that. cast a spell to have her stay in place as you pound into her pretty pussy and just wait for her to give up completely.  “that’s it,” you tell her, admiring the sight below. “you take me so well.” she looks so good under you, a sentiment you remind her of constantly. she’ll smirk and hide her embarrassment by assuring you that she fucks you better–urging competition… and well, you opt to change her opinion on that, giving her more of what she wants. never will you see those cheeks blush, but you know in the other ways her body reacts to you that you’re hitting all the right spots.

shadowheart

shadowheart gets very playful when taking the strap–a display that drives you crazy (in a good way). when you’re fucking her good, her moans will be unapologetically loud. she doesn’t care who might hear; she’s doing it. her face will twist in pleasure as you hit her g-spot, followed by a chant of your name. and she does all of this as erotically as she can, knowing that it’ll only entice you to give her more. there are also moments where she’ll get embarrassed easily, depending on her mood, but she’ll enjoy it all the same. you have to tease her about it, though. a little humiliation here and there never hurt anybody, right? if she’s trying to be inconspicuous about how much pleasure she’s in, she’ll cover her mouth and/or face. she wants you to play along.  “no,” you say, grabbing her hands and pinning them to the bed. “i want it all.” her cheeks flush a bright pink as she attempts to wiggle free of your grip, but she can never quite do so. you take the time to pull out of her slowly, looking down to see the strings of wetness connecting her pussy and your strap. she follows your eyes, taking in the sight before her. a small groan escapes her lips, but is quickly interrupted when you slam the strap back inside of her. she throws her head back and moans loudly, giving you just what you wanted. she likes it when you’re a bit rough, after all. be prepared for a game of her testing just how rough you can be with her. she will savour it all. when she feels herself getting close to her climax, shadowheart will grab your face and drag it down to hers, crashing her lips against yours with fervour. she takes your bottom lip between her teeth, applying more pressure the deeper you get. she releases it when she’s really close, her incessant moans escaping into your mouth. with each brush of the strap against her g-spot, she holds onto you tighter. she wants you as close to her as you possibly can when she cums all over your strap. body worship is also a must when she’s being fucked by you. admire her out loud and allow your hands to roam her body. call her a good girl, and tell her that she’s doing a great job. she’ll get much wetter for you anytime words like that come from your mouth. she wants to feel sexy and adored (which is easy when she’s with you).

karlach

karlach will ride you anyday, anywhere. she loves the feeling of how deep you are inside of her as she bounces on your strap, her hands on your abdomen to hold herself up. she also enjoys the extra stimulation of your hand strumming her clit, inching her closer and closer to her orgasm (one of many).  she’ll take you in various ways. aside from riding you, karlach really has no preference. she just likes each session to be as passionate as possible. she shows a lot of her love physically, and wants to be shown the same. she wants your hands on her as much as the situation allows. the feeling of your skin against her own just makes her feral. she can never quite consume you as much as she wants to, though. being able to give up control and be vulnerable with another person is big for karlach. luckily, it’s so easy with you. she’ll let you do whatever you want with her, happily taking all that you give her. she takes it like a champ, too. remind her of that. you’ll hear karlach curse a lot during sex. she struggles to find the words to describe how she really feels, so a string of profanities will escape her mouth at any given point. “fuck,”she moans when the strap continuously brushes against her g-spot. “oh my fucking gods.” her head will be thrown back, her hands squeezing whatever is beneath her to keep her grounded in this plane of existence. she’ll beg for more, asking you to go deeper inside her.  “please,” she pleads. “i need more.” and more you give her, without any hesitation. you like to admire the way her face contorts every time you bottom out inside of her, resting there for a moment (at her request) before pulling back out and repeating the process.  clitoral stimulation is also big for her, as hinted at before. if your hand isn’t on her clit, hers will be. she’ll rub circles as you thrust into her, moaning at the sensation she feels when her fingertips brush against the strap.  karlach also likes to watch all that’s going on. she’ll angle herself in a way to see the strap go in and out of her, feeling herself grow wetter at the sight. a moan or two may also escape her mouth.  and when she cums, she cums hard. she grips you tightly as her pussy clenches around the strap, wanting you to stay inside her as she goes over that peak. she’ll recover quickly before asking for more.

[lesbianpepsi]

Fuck it I love you

pairing: sam carpenter x fem!reader

summary: When paired with Tara Carpenter for a project you were expecting a B or maybe even an A. Not falling in love with Tara's older sister, Sam.

series masterlist

words: 2.320k

warnings: mean sam, light swearing, reader being down bad for our sammy, bad writing

authors note: alright my darlings the first chapter to the sam mini series as promised. the wonderful anon who requested this, my dear i am so sorry it took so long for me to get to this. although it's taken a while, i do hope you still enjoy this! feedback and comments are greatly appreciated:)

The wonders of college. 

You get to meet new people, explore your sexuality, party like there’s no tomorrow, try new things and staying up till three in the morning  crying over a piece of work that’s due that very morning that you decided to wait till the last minute to do only to instantly regret it, saying you’ll never do the same mistake next time but  knowing deep down inside you will. 

And of course the trials and tribulations of group projects. Something everyone loathed, and if anyone said otherwise they’re lying. 

You have never been a fan of group projects; so when your professor announced that you’ll be doing a pair project you couldn’t tell if you wanted to slap him or cry. Probably both. The absolute worst thing about projects that involve more than one party member is awkwardly asking a stranger if they’re willing to work with you.

That’s why when you heard that familiar sweet voice speak to you, you couldn’t help but smile. 

“You cool with doing this together?” Tara Carpenter asked you with a nervous smile. 

You and Tara aren’t exactly friends, more like acquaintances; if one missed a presentation the other would give them their notes to copy off of, saving a seat next to each other, saying hello if you ever see each other around campus. 

It isn’t the fact you don’t want to be friends with Tara, she seems like a really kind woman but she’s quite distant and quiet. You can’t judge her or shame her for it since you’re shy, awkward and always in a state of anxiety. 

Maybe this would be the push to make you and Tara become friends. 

You smile at the brunette with an appreciative gleam in your eyes. “Please. I was already planning a speech on why the professor should allow me to do this alone.” Tara laughs, covering her mouth with her hand as the corner of her eyes crinkled with delight. 

“Lucky for me then.” Tara stays silent for a few moments before she added. “Do you wanna just get the whole awkward phone exchange now?” 

You chuckled, nodding your head as you dug out your phone from the pocket of your hoodie, unlocking it and passing it over to her. Tara stares between and your phone almost bewildered with the fact you just passed your phone over to her without hesitation, rather than just saying your number. 

She slowly takes your phone and adds her phone number into your contacts texting herself before passing it back to you. You smiled at her as you pocketed your phone back into its original space of your pocket. 

___________

A few days have passed ever since you and Tara exchanged phone numbers but no plans had been made on when you two should start. You refused to leave this till the last second like you’ve done so many times before, swallowing your nerves you unlock your phone and send Tara a message.

Me (11:32am): hey tara it’s y/n from class, i was wondering what day we can meet to start our project. i was thinking we could meet in the library whenever you can :) 

Instantly you shut your phone off after the message is delivered; there always has been something so weirdly intimidating about messaging someone you don’t really know. Deciding to distract yourself you go make yourself a sandwich for lunch, leaving your phone in your room. 

After two episodes of New Girl and a delicious sandwich had been eaten you returned to your room in search of your phone. Flopping down on your bed you grab your phone and see Tara has messaged you back.

Tara (12:15pm): hi y/n:) if you’re free we can meet today to get started on our project? the only issue is that i can’t come to the library

Me (12:23pm): im more than good with today!! :D

Me (12:23pm): do you wanna come over to my apartment then??

Tara (12:24pm): actually is it alright if you come over to my apartment, around half two?

Me (12:24pm): yeah idm, just as long as we start it lol. where do you live?

Tara (12:28pm): the apartment complex near Blackmore, apartment number 56

Me (12:28pm): okie dokie, see you soon :D 

Tara (12:29pm): 😊👍

You grinned to yourself slightly proud you’ve decided to be smart and start this project early. You just hoped the actual planning of the project would go just as smoothly. 

___________

At two you decided to leave your apartment, wearing a simple white shirt along with some mom jeans. Not even ten minutes into your walk it began pouring down with rain, leaving you sprinting towards the complex as your heavy backpack hit your bag with every step. 

Slamming the double door entrance to the apartment complex open, you instantly gasp for breath as water drips off of every part of you. 

How fucking typical. 

You pull out your phone and with wet fingers you send Tara a quick message before slowly starting to walk up the stairs. 

By the second floor you started to get tired, by the third you began wondering why the fuck there isn’t an elevator in this place, by the fourth you’re questioning your life choices and by the time you arrive on the fifth floor you’re breathing like a life long smoker who just ran towards the store after noticing they’re out of cigarettes.

Like a zombie you walk over to the apartment door with the number ‘56’ on it, sluggishly you raise your hand and knock on the door two times.

After a painstakingly long time a woman answers the door, and you’re pretty sure your heart explodes at the sight of her. 

She’s got olive skin that looks so irresistibly smooth, dark brown eyes that glared at you, she’s around the same height of you if not maybe a bit taller. She’s leaning against the door frame as she’s only opened the door a small amount so her figure could be shown. 

Her lips are pulled in a tight straight line as her arms crossed over her stomach, the tight grey vest top she’s wearing showing off her impressive biceps. She’s glaring at you with her cold eyes as she glowers down at you. 

“Who are you?” She asks in a voice that is ever so raspy, her eyes gazing up and down your body. Your ears burn scarlet red at her eyes checking you out as you stare at her in awe. “I’m, uhm, Tara’s project partner. Y/n L/n.” You stutter out as you can feel your heart beating erratically in your chest. 

If this isn't gay panic you don’t know what is. 

“Why are you so wet?” She questions with judging eyes.

‘Cause of you

“It started raining after I left my apartment and I didn’t bring a coat.” You explained with a nervous smile as you locked eyes with the woman’s. 

She hummed as she turned to look behind her, after a few seconds the door opened wider and Tara appeared next to the woman, the height difference between the two almost making you laugh.

Tara smiled a small smile to you before it faded and changed into shocked one. “You’re soaked.” She states in a matter of fact way. You laugh nervously as you nod your head, rubbing the back of your neck with your hand. “Started raining on the way here.” 

She frowned concerned as she took a step back, allowing you to enter, while the older woman still stayed in the doorway, glaring daggers at you. You swallowed nervously as Tara glared at the woman. “Sam, she's fine, don't be a bitch.” 

Sam

Sam stares at you for a while before she reluctantly leaves the doorway and back into the apartment, you smile at Sam’s behaviour as you turn to look at Tara.

“Sorry about her, she's just really protective over me.” Tara apologises with a smile as you enter the apartment, closing the door behind you. 

As you get a good view of the apartment you notice two other people talking to Sam, you've seen them around Blackmore.

The three of them are glaring at you as they whisper among each other. When they notice you’re looking at them they silence, all silently staring back at you.

Without thinking, you wave your hand at them as you smile. “Hi, I’m Y/n. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen you two before around campus.”

Tara doesn’t allow you to say more as her slender fingers wrap around your wrist as she drags you towards the dining table, your eyes remained on her beautiful sister Sam.

“I'll get you a towel, you prepare.” Tara tells you with a smile before taking off. You nod your head as you do as she said, take off your backpack and take out everything from inside it and place it onto the table.

Tara thankfully returns a few minutes later with a towel and a dry hoodie, she passes them over to you.

“You can borrow the hoodie if you want since your shirt is more than less see through.” She says with an amused laugh, you look down at blush at the fact it’s quite obvious you’re wearing a black bra.

“Thank you.” You tell her with an embarrassed laugh as you shamelessly take off your shirt and throw it into your bag before putting on the hoodie. It's warm and slightly too big for you, but you don’t mind it. 

Grabbing the towel you place it under you, making sure you wouldn’t utterly soak the chair from the rain on your pants.

She gives a smile before she begins talking about her plans on what you two could do, stretching to reach the notebook full of notes you had brought with you. 

You tried listening to Tara, you truly did, but not even five minutes after Tara had begun talking Sam had entered the kitchen to make a drink.

Suddenly every word Tara uttered it went into one ear and flew right through the other. 

Her back faced you as she grabbed the glass from the top cabinet, not even having to go on the tip of her toes to reach it, something the shorter Carpenter would definitely have to do.

You smiled without noticing the longer you gazed at the gorgeous woman as she carried on making her drink. 

“Y/n.” 

You snapped your head back at Tara who had her eyebrows raised. “Did you listen to anything I said?”

Sam turned to look at the both of you as she leaned against the counter, sipping her drink. Her eyes focused on you as she drank at a slow pace.

You smiled nervously at her to which Sam only scowled back at you. 

“Yeah, uhm, work and stuff right?” You waffled with a smile, Tara simply sighed as she shook her head. She went to say something but got interrupted by her older sister.

“Is that my hoodie?” Your head whips back towards Sam’s direction, Sam’s eyes focused on you. You blushed as you noticed Tara and let you borrow McHottie’s Sam's hoodie, not hers.

Your fingers toyed with the bottom of the hoodie nervously, before you could reply with utter gibberish Tara answered over you. “I let her borrow it since she was completely soaked.” She explained with a brief tight smile.

Sam hummed as she dropped the glass onto the counter. “But why give my hoodie to her? Why not yours?” 

“Because It was closest to me, Sam. Jesus she isn’t going to do anything so calm down.” Tara defended you in an annoyed tone now, her eyes glaring at Sam as she leaned on her hand. “And tell Chad and Mindy to cut it out with the staring.” 

“I can give it back if you’d like?” You gingerly asked. Both of the girl’s heads snapped towards you at your words. 

“You don’t have to-” Tara started before Sam interrupted her speedily 

“Yes. Give it back.” She demanded, pushing herself off the counter as she advanced towards you. Without hesitation you ripped the hoodie off of you, pulling it over your head quickly as your shirt rolled up with it.  

You smiled sweetly at her as you passed her the hoodie with your right hand, your left hand not so subtly pulling down your shirt. Her fingers grazed over your knuckles as she retrieved the jumper from your hand, her eyes ogling at your shirt momentarily. 

Her eyes connected with yours again as she pulled the hoodie to her side, she glowered over you as you looked up at her with a nervous smile. 

She’s so fucking pretty, oh my fucking-

“Don’t give my stuff out again, Tara.” Sam told her sister as her eyes stayed glued to yours, “Sure, whatever, will you just leave now?” Tara says with annoyance clear in her tone, Sam stared at you for a few more seconds before she fulfilled her sister’s wish by leaving the kitchen silently. 

Your eyes followed her leaving until she was out of your sight. Your eyes landed on the glaring twins to which you smiled awkwardly at them before you returned your attention back to Tara. 

The shorter girl huffed as she flicked through a few pages of a notebook. “Sorry about her, she’s just really protective over me.” She apologised again.

You smiled dreamily at her as you thought more of the older sister. “You don’t have to apologise, it’s actually kinda sweet.” 

Tara gives you a funny look as she snorts a laugh, her fingers finally stopping as she lands on the particular page she was looking for. “You must be delusional if you think Sam is sweet.” 

Guess I’m delusional then, you thought with a smile as your eyes gazed over the half full glass Sam had left in the kitchen. 

[bitchcakegreen]

I finally watched all four episodes of season 3 part 1 and I have thoughts, as a fan and as a screenwriter/former romance novelist, and professional director. I didn’t have netflix but I got it for this season. I did this kinds of analyzations and such during Game of Thrones. Hopefully people enjoy reading. Full disclosure, I have not read any of the Bridgerton books. (I’m about three chapters into Romancing Mr. Bridgerton)

First off, give me all the Pen and Colin all the time. I’ve been hoping they get together from season 1 and I’m so happy Shondaland didn’t make us wait another season, as the books go in a different order. There’s a lot of subtle nuance to Pen and Colin’s scenes, Colin always seeking out Pen wherever they are, the tent pastry scene followed by Colin clearly eating the same pastry as Pen did. The tent scene was freaking hot. I said what I said. Things of this nature make their love affair so lush. It’s that journey to getting to the carriage scene that’s so thrilling.

I didn’t mind Francesca’s subplot or the Mondrich one but I do agree with many I’ve seen here that the subplots almost took over. There was a lot of emphasis placed on things other than Pen and Colin which annoyed me somewhat. Hopefully when we get to part 2 there will be more intense focus on Polin and the subplots are just rotating around them because right now, with the pacing of these first four episodes, it’s the opposite. Polin feel as if they are somewhat an afterthought.

The Cressida redemption movement I don’t think will last into part 2. I think all this work is to try and make the audience sympathize with her and then when she goes after Pen, Pen as Lady D, and so forth we are supposed to think “OH! But she was being so nice.” Hopefully I’m wrong and they follow through on her storyline because if they don’t…they wasted a lot of time and storyline on her instead of focusing on Polin.

I’m ambivalent about Lord Debling, so meh. Sorry about it.

Anthony and Kate - absolutely unnecessary but I know why they brought them in. One, he is the Viscount so he would be around. Two, they are fan favorite. I get it. I accept it. It was just wasted real estate for me. But to each their own.

I love Mr. Finch and I LOVED he got to be such a beaming brother-in-law for Pen in the green dress. I do wish they hadn’t shown us the dress reveal in the trailer. It would have been such an awestruck moment for us to see it first in the show. Sweeping cape removal and glittering loveliness.

Pen’s sisters and their race to get pregnant. It’s all a setup for Pen to be pregnant first or with the male heir by the end of the season. Cute but really long winded in getting there. There is a now since deleted promo clip of Pen, with Colin standing behind her, where she takes his hand and places it on her stomach. So we’re getting a pregnancy nod somewhere next part. May even be why she faints in whatever scene they show in the trailer for part 2.

Eloise needs to get her head out of her butt. I don’t think she’s angry Pen is LW but more angry that she didn’t figure out Pen was Whistledown sooner. She’s mad that Pen didn’t try to see her during the offseason, yet she tells her at the end of season 2 to get the fuck out of her life. Get it together Eloise. I love Eloise, don’t get me wrong, I adore her. I just want her to stop acting like an ass and TALK to Pen.

There is discourse about the second Colin threesome scene, but there really shouldn’t be. There’s a reason for it. It showcases that Colin is done with the charade he’s been playing all season. He isn’t the bon vivant, dashing rake he’s supposed to be. It’s jarring but it’s a scene with a purpose.

All the Polin scenes are delightful. The balloon scene might be my favorite - the pastry scene I include in this. And of course the first kiss and the carriage scene (which lives in my head on repeat) but I have to say, I wanted more Polin screen time. I think if we spliced all the Polin scenes together we see that out of four hours of film, they have maybe a cumulative 1 hour of screen time. Which isn’t much for a couple that is the lead of the season. Hopefully the ratio will be better in part two.

Merit badges and raises to the Featherington coachmen and to Pen’s maid Rae. They are MVPs and are totally gossiping about Polin. You know that tea was flowing in the servant’s quarters about the carriage ride…

Scenes I hope we get in part 2.

1. Full on sexfest with Pen and Colin, the likes to rival Daphne and Simon.

2. Whistledown reveal to Colin. First I want him angry - that passionate angry we use in romance novels. The kind where the hero is always “I’m so mad at you right now I can’t see straight but I need you writhing with passion underneath me screaming my name RIGHT NOW!” kind of angry. I want ripped corsets and torn skirts. If you know you know.

3. Pen and Eloise make up.

4. Big stupid lavish wedding.

5. More unhinged Queen Charlotte wigs. Because reasons.

Sorry this was such a long post, but I needed to get my thoughts out. Thanks for reading if you made it this far. Now excuse me while I go watch part 1 elevenity million more times.

[resident-quilt]

Shrue’s descent into radicalism and what the Silt Verses says about our world today

(also, regarding the giant poem that the episode titles make) ITS A TUMBLR ESSAY BABYYYYYYYYY

Kill your gods. Starve them out, topple their statues, forsake their comfort— Kill the stories that gave birth to them. Tear away your flesh that bears their marks.  Adjudicator Shrue, Ep. 43

The Silt Verses is a story born of its time, to a 21st century world which is slowly decaying—and everyone in it is doing their part to help it decay just a little bit faster. It speaks of capitalism, of corruption, of power and belief and environmental destruction and the rift between generations. When Charles tells Val he can’t really stand behind the idea of a family (“You wonder about what kind of world we’re bringing children into, y’know?”) I had to pause and gather myself; it’s something we hear from so many Gen Z’ers today.

But then Shrue’s speech came, and it made no sense.

Shrue calls for an end in any form it can be given. They call for the loss of all faith and love and community in the world; they call for us to kill the stories of our history, to kill the figures we believe in and the ones that give us hope. Anything, everything, all we can give to stop the decay and degradation of the world. They demand us to defeat the corrupt system we have built by trading our lives to do so.

If our words and stories sustain them, let us fall silent. If our communities rely on them, let us drift apart and die, lonely, in the polluted wilds amongst the howling winds of long forgotten deities.

It made no sense because TSV, most simplistically, embodies “no ethical consumption under capitalism”—and this solidly did not fit. So I cast about for an answer to what it all meant, because TSV had grown to be more than the “folks, look where capitalism got us” which I thought it to be. And Shrue's “we can’t do anything to escape the system but die” was just too flat a conclusion. 

Then I fell upon the poem compiled from each episode’s title.

It begins with the start of humanity: a story of things that have happened, things people have believed, things which have roamed the land from then til now. 

Let me speak first of revelations, and next of dark deceit. Then I’ll speak of champions, of lovers, gods and beasts.

And so the poem continues in a description of this story, until it eventually twists to become entirely self-destructive around Chapters 18-24. It's a reference to how everything in the TSV universe seems to eat itself: their system of gods, sacrifices, even the characters themselves.

If I could trace with bloodless fingers, if my hands could shape the flow, I’d bear this song to the precipice and rend us both to dust below.  We’d both go plunging downwards, one final fall from grace— I’d howl, I’d scream, in victory, and we’d be gone without a trace. 

At Chapter 25, we get a respite from the story. We get a short poetic break which concludes that yes, we’re doomed to die—but we continue as we are despite it, and write our story even if it’ll be lost in the end. It’s a classic conclusion that a lot of literature and poetry fall to, because it’s so very human. It’s a cliche, and it’s a cliche for a reason. 

But we’ll never be rid of each other, my song, my sorrow, and I,  So I’ll bear it trembling onwards: to drift on, to dream, to die.

With that, the poem progresses forward until it starts addressing our end and what happens when we face that. It screams of last-ditch efforts keep on believing, even as we plunge down and down and the world just gets worse and worse. Shrue’s speech takes place in “One Last Song of Revelations” (the title is so fitting!), where they vocalize their realization that their pacifist attitude isn’t doing shit to change anything. 

But when they switch towards radicalism because it’s, evidently, the only way anything will ever get done—the only way anything will get the exposure to maybe make an impact—they speak of the destruction of society as a whole. Not the eradication of capitalism, nor the installation of kinder gods, nor the lowering of sacrifice ceilings. They speak of true destruction. Utter destruction.

Shrue’s speech isn’t some call to action, nor does it embody any concrete ideology which the writers are trying to convey. It’s just an expression of desperation. Nothing is working; no one is listening. 

What this poem sounds like is a story of how our world goes. It's its birth, its self-destruction, its philosophical revelations, its finale.

When we began following Carpenter and Faulkner in the reeds of the White Gull River, we were consuming a commentary on capitalism. Now, it’s more. It’s a commentary, yes, but it’s not only that—it’s an exploration. The Silt Verses is a tragic exploration of our world as it connects to theirs, of how we’ve been driven so far and been corrupted so deeply that only radicalism makes a difference because only radicalism is what gets the notice and attention to spark moderate change. And that same radicalism is going to destroy the society we have left.

But it’s all the same in the end, because society's collapse was going to happen anyways. So at least someone had it in them to fight for something.

GAHHHH I LOVE THIS SHOW

[sunshinechay]

So I finally caught up on My Stand In after being 3 episodes behind due to irl reasons.

The last three episodes have been a lot and while I’m sad to have missed the weekly discussions, I’m also kind of glad I watched all three at once because it gave me the opportunity to get to watch Ming’s progress rapidly rather than waiting (which my ADHD brain is very happy about) and the one thing really stuck with me through all three episodes.

Of the three who knows Joe is Joe, Ming is the only one to figure it out completely on his own. He doesn’t overhear anything, he isn’t told by anyone. Even the priest (is that what he is? Citation needed) won’t give Ming the straight answer he seeks. Joe is neither dead nor alive but a secret third thing, his soul has transmigrated to another body entirely.

Before, when he didn’t know, we got the small kernels of change. Ming is much more straight forward than he used to be. While he was never one to mince words, he is more truthful and up front, even with Joe 2.0. He is honest with him from the start about exactly what he wants. He doesn’t tell Joe the real reason why he wants it, but that’s understandable given that no one else is willing to believe Ming when he says Joe is still alive. So why tell this new stand in why you want him to be so.

Then he figures it out. He puts together the context clues and believes the impossible because he’s the only one who never gave up hope that Joe would come home, would come back to him. Joe does come back to him and Ming immediately sets out to ensure that Joe exactly where he stands in terms of how Ming feels about him. Ming needs Joe to understand exactly what he wants. Ming is probably always going to be the type of person who will use underhanded tactics in certain situations, but it’s completely understandable why he uses the contract to keep Joe with him.

Ming offers up explanations where Joe didn’t ask for them, because he knows that Joe deserves them, whether or not he asks for them. He wants Joe to understand that he regrets a lot of his past actions, including what he did for Tong at the end. Ming had all but admitted that if he could go back and change it, he would.

Ming is willing to confront so many issues head on. He is learning to deal with his emotions in a way that is more productive for them all. He has started to feel more of his emotions out loud in a way he didn’t before. He promised himself he would change if Joe ever came back and so far he has kept his promise. He will better himself and he will grow. He will no longer be stagnant.

He is even willing to tell his father that he is dating Joe. The mere mention of it clearly terrifies him more than he has the words to express, something that Joe picks up on right away and tries to protect both of them from. Preemptively breaking up with Ming to try and save them both a worst heartbreak than simply breaking up.

Tong had spent so much of the show attempting to prove again and again that Ming is under his thumb. He knew that Ming was in love with him in the past and still believes he is now, but he is wrong. Ming will no longer allow himself to be manipulated by Tong and by extension his mother. So he will shoot their ace out of the sky by doing the one thing that terrifies him the most. He will tell his father that he is gay. That he is gay and dating a man. A man named Joe.

He will accept what comes next because the only other options is to lose Joe and Ming absolutely will not do that for a second time. He is willing to lose everything, as long as it means he doesn’t lose Joe.

[wildlife4life]

Fuck-Friday Coda

Tagged by the always lovely @theotherbuckley @perfectlysunny02 @cal-daisies-and-briars @aroeddiediaz @exhuastedpigeon @hippolotamus @loserdiaz @wikiangela @daffi-990 @tizniz and @diazsdimples Thank you all so much for all the tags throughout the week and today! I have eased back on working NFL Buck because I am absolutely swamped with school. I have started clinic rounds and somehow the classwork has doubled for the next set of courses. Which holy crap. So a lot of my days are for studying, homework, and quizzes. Add on being a mom/house wife and yea, not a ton of time to work on my favorite WIP. But I am making time on Thursday to watch the newest 9-1-1 episodes and write codas, because I started them in the final episodes of season 6 and really enjoyed it! So I made a goal to make a coda for most if not all of season 7 episodes! 2/2! I will try my absolute damnest to get some work into NFL Buck because it is my baby and I know how much it is beloved. Until then, enjoy the season 7 codas. Posted to ao3.

7x02 Coda

“We-I…” Buck tries to find the right words again, but he has no idea what they should be.  He doesn’t know if he should be defending himself along with Eddie and Chimney, proclaim that they were just being honest with internal affairs. Or if he should defend Hen and the betrayal she felt when they couldn’t back her up.

Rock and a hard place, with Buck being squeezed tightly in between.

Chimney left the locker-room soon after Hen, with the passing false hope comment, “She’ll come around.”  His phone was half-way to his ear before disappearing around the ladder truck, most likely spilling the entire ordeal to Maddie.

Buck slumps back down on the bench and leans his head against the lockers, closing his eyes with a defeated sigh. Still standing close by, Buck hears Eddie hum in agreement. Yea, tonight was very much a downer.

“We should have had her back.” Buck finally says.

He feels additional weight added to bench and pressing warmth along his arm and thigh when Eddie sits beside him. “We did. We just all put our foots in our mouths trying to show her.” He assured.  He gives Buck knee a gentle squeeze, “You more than me with that whole ‘right call’ comment and wanting to give Captain Collier’s a hard time.”

Buck groans in embarrassment, “I was trying and horribly failing to lighten the mood.”

“The mood was dead on arrival; you had no chance.” Eddie chuckles.

They both go silent, stewing in the hurt emotions left behind by Hen and Chimney, mixing with their own anxiety and worry. It kind of reminds Buck of the last time Hen was captain and that man died at the happiness convention. God that felt like so long ago, when really is less than a year.  Yet here they all are, questioning themselves on the job after losing a patient and without Bobby’s steady leadership to help guide them through it.

Buck could only hope this didn’t send him or anyone else on the team into a spiral of questioning their purpose in life. And he really hoped it didn’t lead to another brush with death, for anyone of them.

The hand on Buck’s knee never left and gave another squeeze, pulling him from his past wallows and has his eyes fluttering open. He looks over at Eddie and sees an understanding smile gracing his lips. “That man’s death isn’t on us. We we’re working on the worst of the crash, and we saved that girl and her mother.  Hen made the right call, the same one Bobby would have made and when those lab results concur with her story, she’ll be back, and we’ll find a way to make it up to her.”

Buck takes a moment to let Eddie’s words sink it and pull him from the beginnings of a self-deprecating spiral. He did his job, he gave his facts of the event truthfully, and Hen would come around. In all regards, Buck just needed to learn how not to put his foot in his mouth, because at the moment it really was a nasty taste.

Slowly most of the tension that had built up during Hen’s confrontation eases away and Eddie felt it through the press of his shoulder into Buck’s, “That has to be a record.” He comments before getting to his feet and reaching a hand out.

Buck doesn’t even hesitate and tries his damnest not to flush too red as Eddie hauls him to his feet with little to no effort. The man has a girlfriend and Buck was done chasing. “Uh yea. Turns out when you stop trying to search for the life’s great moments and instead live in them, internal spiraling is easier to pull out of.” He explains. Eddie also is a big contributor, but Buck isn’t going to admit that to said man.

“Well… At least those self-help books will make good kindling for the next campfire.” Eddie cackles and Buck swats at his shoulder which only makes him laugh harder.

Eventually Buck joins in and the pit of dread dwindles further. He embraces this moment and knows eventually everything is going to be okay.

Short but somewhat sweet I hope! Tagging (no pressure): @jesuisici33 @fortheloveofbuddie @rogerzsteven @lemonzestywrites @evanbegins @buck-coded @devirnis @glorious-spoon @thekristen999 @spotsandsocks @hippolotamus @sunshinediaz @watchyourbuck @lover-of-mine @hoodie-buck @elvensorceress @gayedmundodiaz @giddyupbuck @jeeyuns @bekkachaos @buddierights @try-set-me-on-fire @rainbow-nerdss @thewolvesof1998 @eddiebabygirldiaz @spaceprincessem @eddiiediaz @honestlydarkprincess @doublecheekeddiaz @prosperdemeter2 @transboybuckley @nmcggg @monsterrae1 @dangerpronebuddie @missmagooglie @thebloomingheather

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - THERE IS SO MUCH ON RIGHT NOW, it's crazy-making!

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

July 2024 Week 1

Ongoing Series - Thai

Wandee Goodday (Sat YT) ep 10 of 12 - I am with Dee, noodles do solve everything. The brothers were SO GOOD together. I’m getting to really love a back drop in BL, it’s like the mic drop of gay boys smooching. This is such a good show. I had a big grin on my face while also crying a bit. Everything I want from a BL is happening right here, in front of my eyes.

Did they gloss over the trauma a bit? Yes. Do I care? No. I don't like dwelling in trauma in general, mine, friends, online, or in my BL.

The Rebound (Weds Gaga) ep 2 of 12 - All Thai mafia is gay… again. Yes, it’s still great. No, I have no idea why they’re dropping so many eps at once. That’s not normal for a Thai drama. But I’m not gonna complain except there’s a lot on right now. I like the side couple too. I also like Frank’s poor little rich kid side dish action. I mean, Meen is an ult for me, but Frank is giving excellent second lead syndrome. Suspiciously aggressive and a touch stalker, but I don’t mind a boy that sus if he that cute. And of course, with the mafia involved there is kidnapping.

Look, is this the best show currently airing? No. Which is why it slid a little in the standings. But that's only because Wandee hit it out of the park this week. Frankly, this may not be the best BL airing right now, but it’s the best BL for me.

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 4 of 12 - That oppa bit was fucking genius. (You get it right? If you don't, I can explain.) And I immediately adore the secretary character as a result (I typed that as "reslut" and that works too.) Pleased to have such a "rich man and his spoiled boy" dynamic it going already. A dynamic I am personally IRL familiar with from the 90s. Also, kiddies stop filming adults at play! Sheesh.

I pretty much love all the couples in this show. It’s lots of fun. SamYo’s cat and mouse thing is delightful. Meanwhile, the mains are so sweetly hesitant about kisses and everything (hilarious coming from this pair). I love them and their awkward first time, or whatever is going on.

Do you know what? After that "oppa" comment this lead pair makes me feel a little bit like I’m watching a gay K-drama, similar style of personalities and everything, even the random martial arts ability. And the outing. I'm getting Business Proposal vibes. Nothing wrong with that, I was weaned on K-dramas.

All in all, great episode.

My Stand-In (Fri iQIYI) ep 11 of 12 - Yet again I spent the entire episode saying "poor Joe" over and over again. This time I didn’t cry though.

The pat way to end this is to have Joe walk through that door and then wake up back when he was about to get into the motorcycle accident. So that none of it ever happened. I suppose we’ll see what they do next week but I hope it isn’t that.

We Are Cute (Weds iQIYI) ep 14 of 16 - Do you know what this friendship group reminds me of the most? The old Love Sick music club boys. This is just the college version... 10 years later. (Love Sick was one of the few shows where I mostly didn’t yell “no singing” at the screen (also Ingredients). In my defense, I didn’t know any better back then.)

As boyfriends, PhumPeem are even more puppy/cat paring. And I am even more delighted by it. And them. In fact, this show is ALL puppy/cat pairings. I’m not mad about it.

"I’m hugging you so you won’t feel hungry" is the weirdest pick up ever. But Phum is weird. 

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans (Fri iQIYI) ep 1 of 8 - The PittBabe team behind a new restaurant set BL full of hidden agendas and starring my new favorites SailubPon. I’m reminded so much right off the bat of PokeTongue’s side dish couple in What’s Zabb Man. Interesting, considering that came from Pon’s former studio. Love the call out of obnoxious content creators (not to mention corporate property developers). I like the chef character, he’s nicely complex. In fact, so far I like most of the characters, it’s a good range of different personality types. The plot is a little contrived and complicated but I don’t mind because the characters are such fun.

The Trainee (Sun YouTube) ep 1 of 12 - Reported on this last week already but here's what I said:

Gun still looks like he’s just out of high school. Madness.

The set for the print shop reminds me of Mork’s dad’s place in ‘Cause He’s My Boy? I swear GMMTV has only 3 sets.

I wasn't looking forward to this show at all. Maybe I just needed more of a break from OffGun? Cooking Crush happened yesterday.

Whatever, because I was absolutely riveted by this first episode.

I’m enjoying The Trainee a lot. Like, a lot a lot. It's not higher up just because there is so much good content from Thailand airing right now.

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 5 of 12 - Still a chaos muffin no matter which country. So earnest. So cute. Talking stage commence!!!

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 4 of 10 - I got so bored I started looking up ways to organize my sunglasses. Trash watch here.

Knock Knock Boys (Thurs Gaga) ep 6-7 of 12 - The exes are odd. I like that Latte finally got some backstory.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) Ep 2 of 10 - I’m still enjoying this quite a bit. It’s paralleling the manga quite closely, which is nice. But it’s not gonna be a particularly exciting drama if this continues. The manga is rather quiet (pun intended to amuse not insult).

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - Look, if some kid followed me to college and changed the whole course of his life because I was nice about his dead bird? I'd be skeeved as fuck too. It's odd and uncomfortable, in that way Japan loves. Visuals are on point but can't say I'm enjoying it as yet. Still, it is JBL, and so I am intrigued and open to all possibilities.

It's airing but...

The Last Time (Thai Fri YT?) - Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something. Can't find it.

OMG Vampire (Thai Sun ???) 10 eps - I've put the search on hold for and y'all can let me know if it's worth tracking down once it ends?

In case you missed it

Blue Boys finished it run. I like it quite a bit. This felt a lot like a Strongberry short series. It’s very curtailed and could’ve used some legs but I've been trained into ignoring that for Korean BL. Short has always been their thing. Essentially, two boys who were acquaintances in high school are reunited and it turns out always had crushes on each other. It’s definitely an extrovert meets introvert scenario, and this being Korea, they can’t resist a tiny love triangle in the eleventh hour. But it all came out fine in the end. It has great kisses and higher heat than is normal from Korea. All in all, a surprisingly charming offering. Recommended with some reservations around the brevity of plot and character development. 8/10 

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer released to Korean theaters 5/25. HoTae & DongHee, side couple from Unintentional Love Story are back! Same actors, same character names. I love them. Devastated this hasn't had international distribution. I demand you tell me the moment you find it!

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

July Releases to Come

7/10 Century of Love (Thai Gaga) 10 eps - trailer here, DaouOffroad are back, this time as fated mates in a quasi historical paranormal moment. San has spent many lifetimes waiting for his lost beloved, to reincarnate from her death a century ago. But if he fails to find her within this century's time window, he will succumb to a tragic death. And this time she's a boy. Very much Director Who Buys Me Dinner meets First Love Again, hopefully better than both. I love this pair and think they can handle the premise, it's whether the storytelling is up to the challenge. I'm curious to see but I have reservations.

7/24 I Saw You in My Dream (Thai Weds WeTV) - Dee Hup is behind this one so I have high hopes. Younger boy chronically teased his whole life by the older boy next door suddenly starts having horrific prophetic dreams about his bully and must save hime.

7/26 4 Minutes (Thai Netflix or iQIYI?) - Great is a university student from Faculty of Business and the son of a wealthy business owner. Out of the blue, he gains the supernatural power to see four minutes into the future.

7/29 Battle of the Writers (Thai ????) - trailer here, TutorYim return and while I adore them, I really hope this is better than Middleman's Love. Won't be hard. However: that premise! Ugh. Something something authors fighting - save me. Why don't writers understand that nothing is more boring than writers?

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Product placement du jour! Also the only product placed in a BL that I regularly enjoy myself.

Yes I cried. I'm a sap.

The faens in the wive's positions! So cute.

All Wandee

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in it's infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

There's these tricks, remember.

[thelonewolf48]

The most beautiful image in The Loyal Pin...

According to me and me alone!

If you want to dive into my overthinking brain and see me nerd about photography and why I think this particular shot is the best so far...

Then jump after the cut because it's gonna be a kinda long post!

Before episode seven falls upon us, I want to talk about one scene that makes me lose my mind and that previously commented on Twitter (because I refuse to call it X).

I’m sure there are more prepared people out there to talk about this, but my very amateurish ass can’t stop the word vomit I’m about to post.

I love photography and cinematography.

I love The Loyal Pin and, of course, FreenBecky.

I didn’t come here to tell you how beautiful TLP is, we all agree of its beauty. But, there’s a scene from Episode 6 that I can’t take out of my head for many reasons. If they did this fully knowing what they wanted from this, then they have all my respect! But even if it was a more instinctive choice, I still want to praise them for the shot!

I’ll begin by saying that movies and series can tire our eyes. We have less than seconds to react to the images thrown at us. Some directors make an effort to film in a way that we don’t get tired, that we don’t have to work much to focus on what they want us to see. I won’t go too deep into this topic because it is not the reason why I'm posting this rant.

I’ll try give a short explanation:

Here, we have a medium close-up shot, obviously the point is their faces and their feelings.

Then we jump to the next cut.

And here the magic happens!

Once the image changes, our eyes don’t move! We might not notice because it’s a cut instead of a fade, but this is what it looks like when we merge both images together!

With that our of the way, let’s get to the main point!

First, this is a beautiful Wide Shot! It contains so much more information than we can think. And I want everyone to admire it!

This one feels powerful and it moved us because they’re placed in one of the four intersecting lines when divided in thirds.

Second, we have frames!

And lastly, the image is also divided by 2 very contrasting color temperatures. Warm and cold!

This division is what I want to talk about.

We know why we are in this scene. Lady Pin is heartbroken because they don’t have much time left and they just finally confessed their feelings. So, she feels sad and in pain. She’s feeling blue… and blue is a cold color!

We have visuals of her feelings, not only for what we are seeing in the scene but also on how the cold of the room is trying to eat the warmth of the chandelier!

In contrast, we have Anil trying to give as much comfort as she can. She is hopeful of the future because she knows their love is real and because she will return so much faster than last time. Anil’s warmth is trying to conquer Pin’s cold.

But she is feeling sad too, although she tries to be positive about it, she doesn’t want to leave. I believe this also represents her own feelings of guilt for hurting Pin. Of course, we know it wasn’t her fault but the guilt is there too, she also feels powerless and I dare say even defeated.

That’s why the image isn’t divided in the middle, and both are on the colder side of the room.

You guys have no idea of what happened in my head when this image popped up!!

Maybe there will be other scenes that will make me go wild… But so far, this imagine right here is a masterpiece.

Or maybe I’m reading too much into it!

[thebestofoneshots]

Gilded Constellations | wolfstar x reader

Series Masterlist | Previous episode

Pairing: Wolfstar x Reader Word Count: 10.3 K Warnings: none Prompt: You finally throw the magical party that you'd been planning for Marlene. The night gets even more bewitching as you engage in a series of party games, including a daring game of Potion Pong and a spirited game of truth or dare. As secrets are unveiled and dares become more challenging, the first sparks of romantic tension begin to ignite. This IS a wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it. THIS EPISODE CAN ALSO BE READ AS A ONESHOT

Fooled Around and Fell in Love

Thanks to Peter’s retellings of the Gryffindor try-outs, you’d gone from the new girl in sixth year, to a little bit of a quidditch celebrity. Some smaller kids would go see the Quidditch Practice, and according to James, he’d even seen some of the players from other groups trying to get a glimpse at you when you were in the Great Hall. Trying to measure if the stories had actually been real or if it was all just school gossip. 

A smaller Gryffindor girl even approached you once, to ask if it was possible that you taught her how to do the triple backflip you’d done last Friday. You had to awkwardly explain to her that you hadn’t done a triple backflip, but that you would be happy to help her get more confident on her flight technique someday. She’d gone back to her friends with a huge smile, her friends squealing when she told them the news. 

“Peter made me into some kind of celebrity,” you complained to Mary as the two of you walked to the courtyard together. You had teamed up with her for your Herbology project, and you were on your way to the garden to find some dried leaves to turn into fertiliser. 

“No-uh,” she said, shaking her head “You did it yourself, love.”

“I didn’t go around telling everyone about the tryouts,” you responded as a pair of young boys passed the two of you, looking at you with wonder.

“But you slayed those tryouts by yourself! You did that backflip trick, not Peter. And he’s not the only one who’s been retelling the story all over the school. I heard Teddy tell his friends about you a couple of days ago in the common room.” 

“Well, either way, it’s hard to get used to all of this attention. In my older school, I wasn’t so popular.” 

“And you thought coming here and making friends with James Potter and Sirius Black of all people would let you blend into the background?!” 

“I kinda brought it onto myself, didn’t I?” 

“You’re gonna have to take that new-fund popularity and embrace it.” She said “Or you can just do whatever Remus does, he can somehow be a hot shot and still blend in the back when he wants to.” 

You raised your eyebrows, it was true, even when he was with the boys all the time, he tended to stay in his own little friend group rather than talking to everyone the same way Sirius and James did. 

“I’ll ask him sometime…” you said as you crossed the gates with Mary. Then leaned onto her, “Isn’t that Holden Crawford? Next to Alexander Wood?” 

She nodded, “you should invite them now that they’re together.” 

“Yup,” you said, giving her a small pat on the back and walking towards the Hufflepuff head boy. 

“Hey Alex,” you said with a smile. 

He turned to you, and smiled when he identified you “Gryffindor, aye?” He pointed at your tie. 

You nodded “I guess so,” you replied “I wanted to thank you for being so nice to me on my first day.” 

Holden, who stood next to him, raised one of his eyebrows “Ahh.. so you must be the infamous (Y/N) everyone’s been talking about.” 

“Infamous? Hope not!” You teased with a smile and handed him your hand to shake “(Y/N)(Y/LN), nice to meet you.” 

“Holden Crawford,” he replied, shaking your hand. 

“The Ravenclaw… seeker?” You asked with a bit of a smile. He raised his eyebrows in response “James told me all about the other teams. Gotta know who you’re going up against.” 

“And… you’ve done your homework.” You nodded. 

“Anyway, I gotta go…” you said pointing at Mary, and after a couple of steps, you turned back to them “Actually boys–“ you said walking back towards them “–this Friday the Gryffindor Tower is having a party. I’m helping plan it. It’s for Marlene’s birthday.” 

“Your beater…” acknowledged Holden. 

You nodded eagerly, Holden knew Marlene, that was perfect. “Yeah exactly! Anyway, I’m in the planning committee along with Mary over there,” you pointed at your friend “and I think it would be great to have you guys there. You know the more the merrier,” you said that last bit with a smile.

“I’ll come if you come,” Holden said to Alex. Who seemed to be thinking about it. 

“Come on,” you animated him. “It’ll be super fun, I promise! I’ll help pick the music out.” 

Alex finally nodded “Ok, we’ll see you there.” 

“Brilliant! 8 PM, Gryffindor Tower. Don’t miss it!” You chimed “Anyway, I am in the middle of picking up some dried leaves for herbology so I’ll leave you boys to your things,” You said before walking back to Mary. 

“So...?”

“They’re coming,” you said with a proud smile. “And Holden knows Marlene. As in, he instantly identified her as Gryffindor’s beater.”  

“Oh, she’s so gonna shit herself when she sees him at her party.” 

You nodded and the two of you walked inside the small green area to pick out some dried leaves, levitating them from their place on the floor and placing them on the satchel Mary had brought. You then walked together to the greenhouses and started the spell that would turn the leaves into a very potent fertiliser, even if it took some time. Professor Folly would evaluate you based on how efficient the fertiliser was in the end. And you’d found the recipe on an old book in the library, that promised to both potentiate the growth of plants and maintain them. 

September 10th, 1976

When the day of the party arrived, the air buzzed with anticipation. You were in the Gryffindor tower, along with Remus and Beth, attempting to decorate the area. Beth had asked her mom to send some streamers and she was magically sticking them all over the ceiling. You sat on one of the coaches and used your wand to blow some balloons that she’d also gotten from her mom. You had the idea to fill some of the balloons with glitter, and you’d blow them up when she arrived, leaving a trail of sparkly glitter all over her, and everyone else. 

“We’ll be finding glitter in our dreams after today,” said Remus as he sat down next to you with a box of tapes. You finished timing one of the balloons and leaned over the box to take a look at the stuff he had. Led Zeppelin, Bowie, The Clash, Queen, Abba, they had it all. 

“What will you choose?” You asked him, he pulled out a cassette with Sirius’s elegant handwriting and handed it over to you. “Marauder’s mix tape?” You asked. 

“It’s what we call ourselves,” he said “Sirius invented it back in the third year, it’s still a thing now.” 

“Fitting,” you said with a smile. And turned the tape to take a look at the songs. Smiling when you saw Rebel Rebel in the list. “

“He made this one over the summer,” he said pointing at the cassette, “and he brought a music player too,” he stood up “I’m going to go get it now, wanna help?” 

You nodded and stood up, walking behind him towards the boys’ dorm. “Excuse the mess,” said Remus as he let you into their room. He was being silly, there wasn’t much of a mess. Maybe some candy packaging on the floor and one of the beds wasn’t done. You saw a Queen poster on top of said bed. 

“Lemme guess,” you said pointing at the bed “That’s Sirius’.” 

Remus nodded “It was an easy guess.” 

You took that as a challenge and started scanning the rest of the beds, the one to the left of Sirius’ was well done, and it had a hard case for glasses on the nightstand, you pointed at it “James’” Remus nodded, with his eyebrows raised. You kept looking. Now there was a bed lousily made and one that was neatly done. The lousy bed had some parchments on top, along with a bag of chips. The other bed had a nightstand with some books, and a sweater folded over near the pillow, very neatly placed as well. You pointed at the one with chips “Peter’s, and the neatest one is yours, obviously.”

“Almost perfect, I’m next to Pads.” 

“But the glasses case?” You asked confused. 

“They’re for reading, my eyes get tired at night.” He then walked towards a dresser “Mind giving me a hand?” He asked, you nodded and walked toward it. It looked slightly heavy, but you placed your hands on the other side, ready to help him pull “Just make sure nothing from the top falls, m’kay?” He then pushed the dresser, with an ease that had you stunned. Maybe it just looked heavy. Behind the dresser, there was a small hole in the wall, filled with all sorts of things. From hand-rolled cigarettes, to prank supplies, and scary-looking vials with labels on them. 

“You’ve got a secret stash?!” You said surprised, kneeling down to look at it better “How? Does my room have one too?” 

“James blew up the wall while practising bombarda in 4th,” Remus explained “We didn’t want anyone to find out so we rearranged the furniture to hide it. Sirius figured it’d be a good place to hide stuff.” 

“Do you mind?” You asked, nodding towards the little hole, he shook his head and you grabbed one of the bottles “Shrinking solution?”

“We brewed it last year, Prongs and I stole it from Slughorn’s office.”

You grabbed another one “And…” you looked at the label “Vanishing Solution.” 

“Sometimes you gotta get rid of the evidence.” You laughed, Moving some things around, you found some dungbombs, neatly stacked. And behind them found a box of Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder. “Oh, and you’ve got some good stuff in there too,” you said as you grabbed a Magazine with a very dotted young woman –with nothing to cover her chest–, she had a seductive stare and blew kisses at you. 

Remus snatched it from your hands “Sirius must’ve put it there,” He said all too quickly, throwing the magazine under a bed.  

“Hey! I don’t judge,” you said, raising your eyebrows “It’s a boys’ secret stash after all.” 

“But I don’t–“ 

“–you don’t need to excuse yourself, Remus.” You said and pointed at the back “That’s it, isn’t it? the cassette player?” 

Remus nodded and pulled it out, dusting it off “We left it here all summer.” You helped him put all the things back in their place. Except for the dirty magazine that was still under the bed somewhere, and stood up, going back to the side of the dresser to push it back to its place. 

You tried to push it before he grabbed onto the side. But it was impossible, the dresser was heavy. At least for you, for Remus, who pulled it with ease back onto its place, it seemed like lifting a feather. You stared at him as he turned to grab the cassette player, he was tall, the tallest of the group, and he did have nice broad shoulders. Again, the sexy pirate analogy came to mind, but he didn’t seem particularly strong. He didn’t have thick muscles like James or Teddy. Which completely clashed with what you’d just seen him do. You shoved all those inconsistencies to the back of your mind and followed him towards the door. 

The two of you walked downstairs again, finding Beth still working on the streamers, as Remus went to set the cassette player on the farthest section of the recorder you went back to your balloons, levitating those that were ready all over the common room. As you were doing, you saw Lily and Mary arrive, they both carried snacks and other food things in their hands. Mary had a huge bowl and she placed it on the table Lily was arranging it, and she set herself to prepare a punch. “It’s Mary’s signature punch,” explained Lily “She makes it for every party, everyone loves it.” 

“I’m looking forward to trying it,” you said with a smile. When you were done with the balloons you rushed towards Lily and helped her finish the refreshments area.  

Sirius and James arrived later. Carrying several bottles in their hands. “Are you sure those are safe?” Lily asked, frowning at the bottles.

“Yes Lils,” said Sirius rather exasperated and turned one of the bottles around for her to see the label was still on “They were purchased in Hogsmeade.” 

“By who did you say?” 

Sirius smiled, “Nice try Evans, it’s still top secret.” 

“When is Marlene getting here?” You asked as you helped James with some of the bottles. 

“Tom is distracting her,” said Beth from somewhere. “She’ll be here at around 8:30.” 

“Well then, everything looks ready,” Sirius said with a clap of his hands “Imma go put on some nicer garments.” 

James, who was still wearing some Quidditch gear from practice, also left the room. You’d been allowed to skip after saying you felt bad, that way James entertained Marlene and you could focus on decorating the common room. 

Remus was already wearing casual clothes, while Lily, Mary and yourself went up to change. 

Once in party clothes, with glitter all over your eyes –that Mary had insisted you had to put on–, you went back down, finding some people were already making it to the party. You identified a couple of kids from your classes that were from other houses. Holden and Alexander were both already in the party too, which made you smile, nudging Beth so she was aware too. Then she smiled wickedly and leaned into you “I’ll go make some arrangements for later,” she said before disappearing in the swarm of people.  

“What’s she up to?” Asked Sirius, who somehow had ended up beside you. 

You shrugged in response “I wish I knew,” you said and saw him drinking from a black mug. “What you drinkin’?”

He licked his lips “Mhm.. this?” He asked, raising his cup “Wanna try?” 

You raised an eyebrow and grabbed for the mug, feeling his cold rings as your fingers brushed over him to take a hold of the mug, and pulled the mug up to your lips. You winced once you’d taken a sip, you were not expecting for the liquid to be straight-up iced vodka.

“You didn’t even try to water it down,” you complained, handing the mug back to him. 

He just shrugged “I like it, cools your throat down.” 

You rolled your eyes and pushed him gently “At least put some juice on it or something.” 

“It’s the expensive stuff, you’re not meant to water it down.” 

You rolled your eyes at his remark when Mary came out of nowhere and pulled your arm "Sorry Sirius, I’m taking her with me,"

You raised your eyebrows at that but followed alongside Mary, "What’s wrong?" You asked her preoccupied. She looked like she’d been running and had a blush on her cheeks, well perhaps running wasn’t it, you thought as you noticed her slightly dishevelled stance. 

"Nothin’," she responded casually, "I brought you here because I wanted to introduce you to someone," she pulled you into a corner "he was at the bleachers when you were on tryouts. I got good word he’s been wanting to meet you ever since."

Your eyebrow rose, yes the try-outs had been the talk of the castle for the past week, but someone wanting to befriend you after it… perhaps it wasn’t so incredible "Who is it?" you asked.

You felt a looming presence from behind and the two of you turned around, a very tall boy, probably as tall as Remus, was there, with a huge smile on his lips "(Y/N), this is Minho Yun, Minho this is (Y/N)."

You smiled and held your hand out to shake his, "Nice to meet you.”

He shook your hand “Nice to meet you too.” 

He started to talk again but Tom came rushing through the door like a madman “Everyone HIDE!” He roared as he jumped behind one of the coaches. No one moved, he stood up again “Marlene’s coming you whackheads, find a freaking hiding spot!”

“Shit,” you said before running towards a small closet-like spot hidden behind one of the wall rugs you’d found a couple of nights before after your quill sharpener fell out of your hands. But once inside you found yourself sharing the spot with someone else. “Puppy?” You asked when you smelt the same cologne you’d felt before. 

“(Y/N)?” He asked “What are you doing here? This is my spot!” He whispered-yelled. 

“Well then, move over so the two of us can fit comfortably,” you retorted, he adjusted himself a little, and you managed to fully enter the small space “Shouldn’t be long.” 

You could feel his hot minty breath near your forehead “So… how’s your potions essay going? Remus a good partner?” 

You nodded, realising later he probably couldn’t see you. “Great, he’s brilliant, I don’t regret switching with James.”

“You switched with James?” He asked shrugging “But Slughorn said–” 

“–We switched before,” you explained. “didn’t make a fuss about it like you. Sorry, you got paired with Slime-head tho. How’s it going?” 

“We split the tasks,” he sighed. “That way we don’t have to see each other more than necessary.”

“And quidditch practice today?” You asked. 

“Oh good, we missed you though.” 

You nodded again, perking your ears to see if Marlene had already arrived. Nothing. “Do you mind if I ask you why they call you Pads?” 

“Short for Padfoot.” 

You raised your eyebrows, looking up at him with “Yeah, I remember that was your nickname, but why?” 

“Sort of an inside joke, can’t really tell you without the boys all agreeing on it.” 

“Oh,” you said with a nod, turning your head back to the door, “must have to do with everyone’s nicknames then.” He nodded. You took a deep breath. You did not expect Marlene to take so long to arrive. “Do you still have the–?” 

“–here,” he said, handing over his mug, "you took a sip, and then another. 

You gave him back his mug and exhaled “Sorry to take your spot.” 

He shrugged, you did not see it, but you felt him, that’s how close you were standing “No problem,” he said honestly “I don’t mind you being all over me,” he teased. 

“Sirius!” You reprimanded, he chuckled. 

“But, in all honesty, love, I’m really happy that you came to Hogwarts.” 

You looked up at him again “I’m really happy I came too. You weren’t joking when you told me how amazing your friends were.” 

He bit his lips as he smiled, god he was stunning, even in the dark “They are, aren’t they?” 

And then you heard the portrait door open, giving Sirius a complicit look as the two of you jumped out of the hideout, alongside everyone else, Marlene was taken aback by seeing so many people “One… Two… Three!” You counted. 

“Happy Birthday Marlene,” everyone screamed, you waved your wand and half of the balloons blew up, sprinkling glitter over every single person in the room. You smiled when you realised the stunning shower of glitter. Some of it fell over Sirius's hair, he shook it off, like a dog would, causing more to drop over you. You closed your eyes tightly and nudged him “Sirius! It’s gonna get on someone’s eyes.” 

He gave you a look “Remind me, love. Whose brilliant idea was to have glitter shower over every single one of us?” 

You averted your gaze, annoyed, and nodded “Just be careful!” You said before running towards Marlene, holding her gift in your hands. You’d gotten her a Holyhead Harpies jersey, you remembered she’d mentioned it being her favourite before. 

When she looked at you, all filled with glitter she pointed an accusing finger “You weren’t sick!” You shook your head with a smile. 

Remus, who had walked closer to the two of you, smiled and placed a hand over your shoulder “She helped with the decorations.” 

“And Potter just… let it happen?” She asked. 

“He didn’t have much of a choice,” you said with a half smile “Happy Birthday Mars! I hope you have lots of fun!” 

Both you and Remus hugged Marlene and then retired to allow the people who were crowding her to give her their own hugs and gifts. You walked towards a less crowded area alongside the boy, and when you turned to him, you realised he had a piece of glitter over his lash, so you placed a hand over his shoulder, “something wrong love?”

You shook your head, “Lean down a little, yeah? You’ve got some glitter over your lash…” he complied and bend his knees until he was about your height, you carefully grabbed his head with one hand, to steady him, and used your other hand to take a piece of glitter away from it, looking at Remus so close, you realised how pretty he really was, he had beautiful chocolate eyes, with golden sparkles, that looked absolutely surreal, inhuman almost. He wasn’t pretty like Sirius who had a very ethereal, fae-like look to him, he had a more haunting and enigmatic look. But after a second, he gave you a questioning look, as if to ask if you were done, you nodded and pried your hands off him with an awkward smile “It’s done!” 

“Thanks.” 

After that some girl took Remus away from you and you went to sit alongside Lily, who was talking to Peter. 

“I think we succeeded,” you said sitting next to Lily, who scooted over to give you some space. 

“Totally!” She smiled, “Peter said he’ll bring the cake at 10:00 pm,” 

You leaned over to look at your friend “Need any help with that Pete?” 

He shook his head, “This… This 5th-year girl will help me, actually.” Both you and Lily rose your eyebrows. 

“Oh… Our Pete’s got a date…” you teased. 

He instantly went red “It’s not a date…” 

Now you shared a look with the redhead “Want some advice?” She asked, placing a hand over his forearm. 

“No… don’t worry about it,” he said, almost thinking if he should ask “We’ve been talking a bit, that’s all.” 

“That’s how it starts,” you said. 

Lily leaned back on the couch “Ah… young love, how beautiful it is.”

You laughed “What are you, 80?” You teased, “What about your young love?” 

“I don’t have any young love,” she said, standing up straight and turning towards you. 

“Yeah sure,” you scoffed. “There isn’t a messy hair, hazel-eyed boy pining for you at all.” 

Lily went red now “(Y/N),” she said, dragging out your name “We don’t talk about that!”

“But we should,” you told her, “don’t you like him back? He’s handsome! Not my type of handsome but handsome nonetheless.” 

“Oh yeah,” she teased “I know your type of handsome all right,” she said, eyeing Sirius, who was talking to Remus.

“Evans! Don’t you dare change the subject!”

She laughed at that “He’s just so… sometimes he can be exasperating!” 

You laughed, in the short time you’d known James Potter, sometimes might have been an understatement. He had his mind pretty much set most of the time, he was thick-headed and maybe a little unhinged, but he was kind, and so full of love for his friends it was hard not to imagine him making a lovely couple with Lily. 

“Hm… maybe he can make up for his bad traits in another way,” you suggested, the other way implicit in the tone you used, and she right up hit you with one of the pillows. 

“All right guys!” You heard Beth shout as she came down with a box in her hands “It’s playtime!” 

“Oh no,” you heard Lily whisper.

Beth finally reached the bottom of the stairs and placed the heavy box on a long table that you set out with some drinks “It’s time to play potion pong.” 

“Potion Pong?” You asked Lily, who looked distressed. 

“All right, gather up, we’re making two teams of four people “Marlene Love, you’re the birthday girl, so you’re playing yes or yes.” She then turned to you “(Y/N), this is your first time in a Gryffindor Party, so you’re also in. I’m playing duh, and Evans,” she said to Lily “You playing today, yeah?” 

“Last time I got a vomiting potion!” She complained. 

“No vomiting potions this time, don’t worry about it.” Beth said dismissively “Potter, you’re in, cause you let lovely (Y/N) out of practice to help with decorations, you, Ravenclaw boy,” she said as if she wasn’t well aware that Ravenclaw boy was Holden Crawford, Marlene’s crush “You’re playing too!” She looked around then, “Minho? Where you at? You said you wanted to play last time in the first round, yeah?” She asked out to everyone “He actually holds the resistance of potion pong title,” she explained, “and… Sirius? Wanna play?” She asked last. Sirius nodded, and you all gathered around the table. Beth divided everyone into two teams, She, Marlene, Holden and James, against Minho, Sirius, Lily and you. 

“All right, the rules!” She said as she started setting the table, bringing lots of vials with different colour liquids out of the box, opening and placing them in a triangle position in front of each side of the table “Simple game, each turn a player gets a ping pong ball, and you have to try and make it enter one of the vials with potions by bouncing it on the table at least once. If it goes in, someone from the other team has to drink the potion it fell on.” 

“What kind of potions–˝ you started to ask.

“–Well if I tell you then where’s the fun?” She said placing her hands over her hips in a reproaching manner “The team that drinks all the potions first loses. If a player is disabled, for whatever reason it might be, he still has to take a shoot in his or her turn. There’s no skipping players, and no cheating, so hand over your wands.” Everyone complied with her demand and she placed them all in a jar on the mantel. “Excellent, if we don’t have any questions, let’s get started.” She pulled out something from her pocket and opened her hand in front of everyone “These are magic beans, each of you gets one of them, you can take it if you can’t stand the effects of the potion, but only after you’ve spent three turns with the effect on you. And… you only get one,” she said with a wicked smile “so if you use it up with a potion that’s not that bad, then you’re gonna have to suck it up and deal with the next potions by yourself, sorry.” 

“And how did she come up with the game?” You whisper-asked to Lily. 

“Beth is pretty well known for her party games,” she responded, leaning into you “and she has the resources to make them all happen too.” 

Everyone walked closer to the table and picked a bean from her hand. Since you didn’t have where to put it, you handed it over to Sirius “Mind keeping this for me?” 

He nodded and placed it in his pocket. Beth spoke then “All right! Witches, wizards, It’s time to start. Mars, it’s your birthday, which means you shoot first.” 

Marlene nodded and grabbed the pig pong ball, shooting it towards the table and having it bounce very close to one of the vials, but failing her shot in the end. 

“It’s ok Mars, not everyone gets it in the first round,” Beth reassured her.

Minho took the ball next, bouncing it and shooting straight into a cup with light blue liquid. He smiled cockily while everyone who was watching cheered. “It’s gonna be you, love,” he said pointing at Beth “It’s only fair since you brought the game.” 

Beth shook her head with a bit of a smile and gulped the mixture down in one go. “Hic–“ she started, “I think it’s –Hic.” 

“Hiccup haze,” you concluded. 

James raised an eyebrow at you and mouthed “How do you know that?” 

“I used it on a teacher I disliked once,” you said with a shrug. 

Lily looked at you with her eyes open wide and her hands covering her mouth “Please remind me not to make you my enemy!” She said and you laughed. 

It was now James’ turn. He grabbed the ball and had it bounce against the table twice before it landed right on a cup, he made a small victory dance and looked straight at you, “Bottoms up, darling.” 

You rolled your eyes but picked up the pink-coloured cup from the table and took the potion in one go. Soon enough all the content in your mouth was turned into jelly, along with the liquid of the potion, “Uggh, I hathe thees slimy feelin’. ”  

Everyone laughed, it was your turn now, so you bounced the ball on the table and somehow scored. “It's payback mopherfugher!” You said pointing at James, who took in the yellow potion in one gulp.

Out of literally nowhere, James Potter turned into a cow. You laughed historically as you heard him Mo, almost choking with your jelly mouth. “Thers a coow pothion?” You asked in between laughter.  

Everyone in the room was laughing along, except for Lily next to you who looked mortified and James –the cow– who just mooed pathetically. And he would have to stay like that for a while. 

Beth was next, she didn’t score. Sirius followed, and he didn’t score either. Marlene’s turn came again and he finally scored, having Minho take the potion this time. He got a potion that made his voice come out in a series of high-pitched squeaks and chirps, like a bird. You giggled along with everyone. 

Sirius shot next and scored, having Holden take the potion, he drank the greenish liquid and shrugged, shaing his head as if nothing had happened. But when he opened his mouth a bubble floated from it, popping after it was just above everyone's head “I don’t think It had any effect,” the bubble said, finally letting Holden’s voice out. Everyone laughed. Then it was James’ turn. Beth moved a little to let the cow close to the table and placed the ball in its mouth. He let it go and it rolled pathetically on the table.

You pulled a face to him and grabbed the ball “Zorthy djaaames!” You said with a shrug and shot. You didn’t score. Beth took the ball and shot herself this time, scoring.

“You’ve-hic– been safe so far Lils –hic,” he said “Go –hic– ahead love!” 

Lily looked at the yellow potion with a frown and reluctantly drank it. Then she started staggering, as if drunk “Everything’s spinning,” she complained, so you walked towards her to hold her. Maintaining her steady. She grabbed the ping pong ball and somehow scored, this time Marlene drank the potion and she started glowing, literally glowing, shining like a lightbulb. 

A bubble came out of Holden’s mouth and popped “Wow Marlene! You really are the star of the party!” You laughed, your mouth was finally getting back to normal, and James turned human again, ending up sitting on the floor and mooing as he turned human. 

He quickly stood up, stretching slightly before he grabbed the ball and shot, having it go straight into one of the cups, he then looked at Sirius “You haven’t taken anything, have you Pads?” You exhaled, thinking he would target you after you made him turn into a cow. 

Sirius looked to the side but grabbed the vial with the black draught, drinking It in one sip. His hair suddenly turned red. He looked at James with an extremely distressed face “What have you done to me Prongs? You ruined my hair!” 

Everyone stared quietly and you handed the ping pong ball to Minho, who probably tried to say thanks but chirped instead. He shot and missed. Beth took the ball next, and shot, right into a purple draught. He gave you a look. “How’s the jelly mouth love?” 

“Almoth gone.” 

“All right, go ahead then.” 

You grabbed the mysterious looking potion and downed it in one go. Your face instantly lit up. giggle brew, you thought as a giggle escaped your mouth, you’d felt this before. A ticklish sensation spread all over your body, which caused another giggle to come out. Lily, who was still dizzy, turned to you with concern. 

But her concerned face looked so hilariously amusing, that it caused you to burst into fits of giggles, too difficult to contain. Then, then you saw Sirius, the beautiful Sirius Black with his hair bright red, oh he’d hate it if someone took a picture. Someone should take a picture, you thought and looked around trying to find someone who would. And there you saw it, Alex, your Hufflepuff friend, had a Polaroid in his hands. So you turned to him with a smile and shouted “A picture–“ you said, bursting into a breathy laugh in the end “Take a picture Alex,” you said, turning to him, holding Lily and having Sirius and Minho turn to the camera. By the time Alex clicked on the camera button to snap the shot, you had managed to place Sirius’ arms over yours and Minho’s shoulders, your cheeks flushed with joy, and eyes sparkling with mirth. 

When Alex handed you the picture you laughed again, you felt so much joy. The picture was absolutely hilarious and you laughed again as you looked at it. “Who’s turn is it now?” Asked James. Sirius grabbed the ball from your cup and took a shot, it landed right on a cup, splashing the two other cups left on his table, and you giggled again, finding it amusing. 

“Who’s drinking it?” Asked Minho, he’d finally gotten his voice back, you giggled remembering the squeaks and chirps. 

Beth did, and suddenly she was in slow motion, every movement seemed like it’d been slowed down, which only made you laugh even further. She took a shot and failed. Minho took the next shot and it landed on one of their cups. Marlene drank it and her tongue suddenly transformed into that of a snake. Hissing as she tried to speak. You tried not to laugh, you really did, it was her birthday after all, but you couldn’t suppress the wave of amusement that’d hit you and bursted into laughter again. 

Lily shot and missed. Beth shot, in slow motion, and it hit right on the cup. You laughed again. Minho downed it since he was the only one not affected by a potion at the moment. Well, Sirius only had colourful hair, but he was making a drama about it. Minho started tap dancing the moment he took the drink and you giggled yet again. 

Eventually, it was your turn again, and you landed the shot, effectively finishing the game. Beth walked towards you and placed a potion-shaped pin on your shirt. It said “Potion Master,” you giggled as you imagined yourself in Slughorn’s clothes, you couldn’t help it, all you felt was a state of sheer merriment and delight. 

Everyone started to take the beans Beth had given them at the beginning. Lily went straight to sit down to try and get a sense of stability and Sirius’ hair turned back to normal. You got close to him and grabbed a strand. “It was cute in red too.” 

He rose an eyebrow cockily, of course he would “Was it?” 

“Yeah,” you said in between breathy laughs. 

He grabbed your jaw in between his hands, you giggled when you felt his cold rings against your skin. “Open your mouth,” he ordered. 

“Kinky!” you responded with a smile, but complied “AAAhhh.” 

He instantly put the bean inside. You munched on it. Finally coming down from the high the potion had you in. 

Then Sirius leaned closer, still with his hand on your cheeks “Now love, do you still want me to be kinky?” 

You playfully pushed him back and used your finger to warn him “Don’t play games with me Black,” you said before walking towards Lily on the couch. 

When you were finally sitting down you saw Peter coming in through the portrait with a huge cake in his hands. A girl making sure he didn’t trip accompanied him. 

You smiled and started singing loudly “Happy birthday to you…” 

Everyone started to sing along “Happy Birthday to you… Happy Birthday dear Marlene, Happy birthday to you…” Marlene hadn’t taken her bean, so she was still glowing like a fairy as she blew on the candles with everyone around her, you noticed a flash from the camera and once everyone was back in their seats as Peter and Remus helped cut the cake, you took the photo they’d taken during potion pong again. 

You stared at it for a while, you looked so bloody happy it was insane “Did you like it?” Alex asked, approaching you. 

“I absolutely love it!” You told him with a smile “ You can really tell I’m drinking giggle brew tho.” 

He frowned, “I don’t think so,” he said, pulling out another picture from his pocket and handing it over. In this picture, you weren’t holding Lily yet, James was a cow and Sirius’ hair was black. Definitely, before you took the potion, but your smile, it was just as bright as in the other picture. You blinked a couple of times, looking at the picture and back at Alex “I regretted not being chosen to play,” he told you “You guys were having so much fun.” 

“I’ll make sure Beth picks you next time. Can I keep this one too?” 

“Hold up,” he said, grabbing it from your hands “Gemino,” he whispered, the picture split in two, creating identical copies. “I need to keep them for the yearbook.” He explained. 

But you looked at him surprised. “You just… you just used a Gemino Curse.” 

He smiled proudly, “You’ll see it in charms on 7th, It’s sooo useful.” 

“I bet! Is it too hard? Could you teach me now?” 

He seemed to think about it for a minute and nodded. Eventually, Mary came looking for you and dragged you to the table to get some more pictures taken along with the rest of the Gryffindor gang. 

Once the party was over, most people were gone except a few of the older kids. That’s when Beth came down with another small box in her hands. “It’s time for the last game of the night,” she said with a smirk and pulled out a potion from the box. 

“Is that… Veritaserum?” Asked Lily. 

Beth nodded “Welcome to truth or dare, where absolutely no one can lie.” 

Your draw dropped in shock “For real?” You asked, and Beth nodded. 

“Come on, we’ll sit in a circle.” she said with a smile “Those brave enough, of course.” 

“HOLD UP! What kind of dares?” You asked. 

Lily turned to you. “Any kind of dare. Last time I had to levitate every single one of the objects in the room.” 

“Yeah, this time might be a bit different. See everyone will write 3 dares and 3 questions on a piece of paper. And we’ll place them in these bowls,” she lifted a blue and a red bowl. “Then each turn you’ll choose truth or dare and pick one.” 

“Aha,” you said and walked towards her “What’s your plan?” You mouthed. 

“I’m playing matchmaker today,” she replied mischievously and nodded towards Marlene and Holden who were talking in the corner. 

“I see,” you said with a smile, you decided you’d become her accomplice, making sure all the dares and questions you wrote were relatively romantic. Little did you know your matchmaking would bite you in the back. “Who else is playing?” You asked.

“I’m in,” said Lily walking to fill up some papers “Mary, Marlene?” 

“We’re coming,” said Mary. Holden stayed by Marlene’s side and took some paper to fill out as well. 

“I wouldn’t miss a good truth or dare,” said Sirius, pulling Remus along with him. 

James and Peter joined you next, and eventually around 12 people had gathered along, all sitting in a circle. You sat right in between Lily and Sirius. Beth grabbed a glass and poured all the veritaserum inside, taking a sip and handing it over to the person next to her so they could do the same. Once everyone had taken a sip, the game started.

“Marlene, you’re the birthday girl, which means you go first,” she said looking straight at your friend, “truth or dare?” 

Marlene, who was sitting in between James and Holden responded “Truth,” and then went to grab a paper from the red bowl “It says, Which Deathly Hallow would you choose if given the chance: the Elder Wand, the Resurrection Stone, or the Invisibility Cloak?” She seemed to think about it for a minute. “Easy, all the other brothers died, I’ll take the invisibility cloak.” She turned to her right “Holden, truth or dare?” 

“Dare,” he said and grabbed a paper “Take a sip from the mystery potion left over from Potion Pong… How do I find that?” 

“Oh,” said Beth pulling something out of her pockets “Here it is,” she handed it over with a smile. 

Holden grabbed it and did what the potion told him “I think it did nothing,” he said, but then Marlene accidentally brushed her arm on his and he started laughing “Oh, stop, please! No tickles!” 

Everyone looked at him confused and once he finally stopped laughing Beth spoke “Oh, Maybe it was Ticklemania.” She then turned to Tom, who sat next to Holden “Truth or dare?” 

“Dare,” he responded and grabbed a piece of paper “Make a floating sculpture with items around the room, All right then, not that hard,” he said and started lifting random objects until he made a floating dolphin. “Your turn Beth.” 

She went ahead and grabbed a dare “Take off a piece of clothing and switch it with the player next to you.” She nodded and took off her scarf, switching it with Lily’s headband.

Lily grabbed a dare “Kiss the player to your right –on the mouth– for 3 seconds.” She then turned to you “To kiss… to kiss her?” She asked, shocked. 

Karma, you thought, you’d written that one. But if you called this one kiss off then all dares could be called off and your matchmaking would fail. So in order to succeed in this ordeal, you would have to kiss Lily. Not that you minded too much, Lily was very pretty, and she always smelled really nice too. 

“It’s what the dare says.” 

She exhaled but nodded “Ok,” she turned to you “Are you sure you’re ok with it?” 

You nodded and you both leaned in, locking lips together. It was over quite fast and all you could think of after, to lighten the mood, was to joke about it “Great kisser Evans.” 

She scoffed and lightly hit you in the arm “And you expected me to be bad? I’m offended!” You both laughed along after that. But it was your turn now. 

Everyone seemed to be avoiding truth so far, and to be honest you also wanted to avoid it, especially since you’d written some of these questions and you definitely did not want to respond them. So you went for a dare. “Perform a spell or charm that can entertain the other players in the room.” You nodded and used a spell to puncture the balloons, causing them all to make a funny sound as they blew all over the room, you leaned down when one of them passed over your head. You smiled when it was done and made a bit of a bow before sitting back down. 

“Sirius, Truth or dare?” 

“Truth?” He said before grabbing one of the papers “Have you ever used magic for personal gain or to break the rules at Hogwarts? If so, explain the situation.” He laughed right after reading “Which one do I even say?” 

“Oh, tell them about the clock,” said Peter. 

“No, tell them about the time you got Peeves to help on a prank.” 

“Yeah guys, go ahead please, continue telling everyone about ALL the pranks we DIDN’T get caught doing. What could go wrong?” Remus said exasperated. 

“I know,” said Sirius “One time, we created a rainy cloud and enchanted it to follow around some disagreeable Slytherin students.” 

Minho, the only Slytherin in the room, laughed first “Oh! That explains so much. Severus was so pissed that day, but he had no way of proving it was you.” 

Sirius nodded, surprisingly, even if Minho was a Slytherin they seemed to be pretty good friends. Maybe it was because they were both beaters. What you didn’t know is that Minho had been the one to help them get the alcoholic beverages, since he was in 7th and had already turned of legal age, all the Marauders had become his friends like that. 

“All right, Moons, your turn,” Said Sirius. 

“Dare,” he responded without beating an eyelash and grabbed a piece of paper “Give a 10-minute foot massage to the person on your left?” 

You laughed when Sirius threw him a teasing look. 

“A FOOT MASSAGE FOR PADFOOT?! WHO EVEN WROTE THIS DARES?”

“Who cares? I get a free massage,” said Sirius as he was unlacing his boots. Remus sighed. Finally, Sirius took his boot off, showing a pair of colourful Gryffindor-themed socks. That’s what you call commitment to a brand, you thought. Sirius then turned his feet towards Remus and let his head fall on your leg “Do you mind?” He asked looking up at you, you could see his dark lashes framing his stunning icy blue eyes, but also noticed how he asked after he had already gotten himself all comfortable.

“No really,” you replied, and he nodded in response, closing his eyes as Remus started rubbing his feet. And damn were you a little jealous as you saw Remus pressing his strong hands on Sirius’s feet, he was clearly, really good at massaging. Sirius’ face told you everything. 

Then it was Imogen’s turn, a Hufflepuff girl you’d shared classes with before. She was very smart, you remembered. She picked truth and grabbed a paper “Fuck, Mary, Kill: Slughorn, Kettleburn and Nightshade.” She said, “Ummm… I’d murder Slugorn, fuck Kettleburn and Mary Nightshade.” 

“You’d fuck Kettlebrun?!” Asked Beth shocked. 

“Between him and Slughorn? Every single time!” Imogen responded. 

“And you’d marry Nightshade?” Asked Peter. 

“Who wouldn’t marry Nightshade?” 

You nodded to what Imogen was saying “No, no, Imogen has a point,” you said pointing a finger at her “Seraphina is stunning.” Sirius looked at you with a raised eyebrow, he still lied his head on your right leg “She has this grace to her, she’s like a ballerina.”

“She was a ballerina,” Said James as he munched on something.

“Really? How do you know?” 

“She’s friends with our parents,” explained Peter, and grabbed a paper himself. He also chose truth “Do you like anyone? If so, say who it is.” Peter was instantly red and looked around as if checking if a particular person was still in the room, he took a deep breath once he was sure, and let himself speak “Yes there is, it’s this very pretty Ravenclaw girl from Fifth called Annabeth.” 

“Annie Doxon?” Beth jumped from her seat “You have a crush on my cousin?!” Peter nodded, still shy. “Ok then, you break her heart, I break your nose.” Peter nodded, he knew Beth wouldn’t be too excited about it anyway “But I’m happy, at least you’re a good guy, I’m sure you’ll treat her well,” she cheered “Potter, you’re up.” 

James grabbed a dare and after reading it out loud he tied his shirt over his belly and started belly dancing as best of his ability allowed him. And surprisingly, he was actually pretty good at it, which had everyone laughing. You leaned over to Lily, careful not to disturb Sirius, whose hair you’d started playing with at some point and whispered “Bet he’s got some sick moves in the bedroom too,” she gasped and hit you lightly, turning red as a tomato. Which just caused you to laugh even more, Lily was definitely going to end up with James Potter. And they’d probably have the cutest children. 

Eventually, it was Marlene’s turn again, she chose dare and ended up giving Holden a massage, and Holden had to hold hands with her for the rest of the game when he got his dare. By the time Mary was taking her paper, the sand clock you’d set to measure the 10 minutes Remus would rub Sirius’ feet was over and he shoved Sirius’ feet off his lap.

“Oi, a bit more careful there Moony!” He complained as he finally sat up straight again. 

“Yeah?, well I’ve had enough of your stinky feet,” Remus retorted. 

“Take that back, My feet are NOT stinky!” He then turned to you “Are they Love?” 

“Sirius, no matter how much I appreciate you, I will not be smelling your feet.” 

He pouted and was about to speak again but got interrupted by Mary “Fuck James, marry Remus, Kill Sirius,” she said carelessly. 

“Who put our names in the–“ Remus started. 

“–You’d kill me? But I’m beautiful!” Sirius gasped. 

“I wouldn’t wanna deal with the drama,” she responded simply. 

“And I’m certain I’d be a better lay than Prongs too.” 

“You wish,” James snapped and threw a pillow he had at Sirius’ face. 

“LOOKS LIKE IT’S MY TURN!” Said Tom with his hands extended to the sides to get everyone's attention. He took a truth as well. “Name a teacher you’d hate to see naked and a teacher you’d like to see naked. WHO WROTE THIS?! You guys are sick. I’d hate to see Slughorn naked. I’d like to…” he shuddered “I don’t want to see any teacher naked.” 

“You have to name someone,” argued Imogen. 

“But–“ 

“Name it, Name it, Name it,” everyone started to choir. 

“Professor Spellman?” 

“Profesor Spellman!?” Asked Peter confused. 

Tom shrugged, “I bet he’s ripped under those robes.” 

Everyone laughed. On Beth’s turn, she had to do a cartwheel and then it was Lily’s turn, she went straight for a dare “Kiss for 30 seconds, whoever is in front of you,” she said looking up from her seat and discovering it was none-other than James Potter. 

You tried to hold a laugh. And patted her on the back, she turned to Beth distressed “Can’t I just Kiss (Y/N) again?”

“Can’t stop thinking of me, huh?” You teased with your eyebrows raised, Sirius’ personality was rubbing on you. She gave you a reproachful look, as if asking for help. 

“Rules are rules love,” said Beth and motioned for Lily and James to get closer together. She awkwardly did, James just stood in his place, frozen in shock. 

“I– I’m gonna start, m’kay?” She asked James.

He nodded awkwardly, and in an instant, they were locking lips. Their kiss was nothing like yours and Lily’s, just a peck and then done, no, they were kissing. James had even grabbed Lily by the waist and pulled her closer at some point. Those thirty seconds were up, and you were sure they were still kissing. But eventually, Lilly broke this kiss off, clearing her throat and crawled back to her seat next to you. 

You turned to her “You good?” You asked with concern. She nodded a slight blush creeping onto her cheeks. You smiled and grabbed your paper. 

“Sit on the lap of the player to your right for the rest of the game.” You read, with a bit of a frown “Seat on the lap of–?” 

“–Sirius Black.” Finished Lily. 

“Don’t you…?” You were about to ask, but Sirius had already accommodated himself and waited for you with open arms and a welcoming smile. Of course Sirius wouldn’t mind, he was Mr. Flirt after all. “Kay then,” you said and moved to his lap. He held you by the waist and set his head on your neck. 

“Mind passing over a dare paper?” He asked. 

You leaned in and grabbed one and opened it for him “Let a player draw something on your arm,” you read. 

He shrugged and handed you his arm. “There you go love, draw me a Picasso.” 

“I could just draw a dick,” you teased. 

He nudged you with his head “Draw something nice, would ya? I’ll leave it on all week if you do.” 

You raised an eyebrow and nodded as you used your wand to bring your quill and ink closer, dipping your quill in the dark ink and drawing on Sirius’ arm. 

“We’re almost out of papers,” said Beth as she leaned over the two bowls. 

“We should probably end soon anyway,” Lily said, stretching her arms, “It’s getting kinda late.” 

“What’s it gonna be Rem? Truth or dare?” Asked Beth. 

“Dare,” he chose again, not even thinking about it, he leaned over and grabbed a paper, looking visibly pale as he read. Not that you noticed, you were very focused on Sirius’ arm. 

“Well then? What does it say?” Asked Beth. 

Remus didn’t say a word. Imogen grabbed the paper from his hand and read it “Kiss the person to your left for one minute straight.” The second those words left her mouth your pen went completely sideways, leaving a straight line in the middle of your drawing, you looked up, alarmed. 

“But… there’s two people on Remus’ left,” Imogen continued. 

“Three people kiss?” said Beth as an option. 

“Three people kiss? What on earth is that?!” Asked Remus alarmed. 

“It’d be too awkward for a minute straight,” said Imogen as she shook her head with a soft tsk, she wasn’t convinced. 

“Pick one then,” Beth said with a shrug.

“Well, it’s obvious, (Y/N), she’s the girl.” Said Peter. 

“But I had to kiss her too, that doesn’t matter in this game,” argued Lily.

“And Sirius was to his left originally,” chimed Holden.

Remus’ eyes darted from one person to the other, looking further mortified at the second. “Let’s just wand, potion, spell it,” you intervened “Destiny chooses instead, how does that sound?” Remus looked at you and nodded. 

“Well then,” you shifted on Sirius’ lap so you could see him directly, “Ready?” 

“Do we do it in the first result or two out of three?” He asked.

“I– I don’t know… Rem?”

“Two out of three.” 

“Well then, it’s settled.” 

The two of you positioned your right hand on top of your left “Wand, Potion, Spell.” You said together. Sirius’ hand turned into a fist with his thumbs up, Potion, beating your extended palm, spell.

“Ok, again,” he said. 

“Wand, Potion, Spell.” You repeated this time you chose spell, beating his wand. 

You gave him a look, Remus was still holding his breath right next to the two of you.

“Again.” 

“Wand, Potion, Spell.” You both choose spell. “Wand, Potion, Spell.” You both picked wand. 

“Sirius!” You complained. 

“Not doing it on purpose luv!” He argued back. 

“Ok, this is the one, ready?” He nodded. 

“Wand, Potion, Spell.” Sirius chose spell, you chose potion. 

“(Y/N) Won,” said Beth, “It’s settled then, go ahead.”

You threw her a look “I’m gonna end up kissing the entire circle with this game,” you complained as you tried to move off Sirius, but he tightened his hold on your waist. 

“Gotta stay here till the end of the game, remember?” He asked, not allowing you to budge. You turned to him with a frown. 

“He’s right, if you get off you’ll get a penalty,” agreed Imogen. 

You gave him a confused look and he just shrugged, “Rules are rules.” 

Remus moved closer instead “You sure you’re ok with it?” He asked, sincerity in his voice as he stared at you, faces inches away from each other. You nodded and closed the gap between the two of you. 

As your lips met Remus', you instinctively placed your right hand on his shoulder to steady yourself, Sirius' hands remained securely wrapped around your waist, you could feel his subtle shifts beneath you as you continued to kiss his friend. The nature of the situation made you wonder if you had ever found yourself in such an uncomfortable scenario before. No, not that –it was weird– but it wasn’t particularly uncomfortable, in fact, Remus’ kiss was quite nice.

It was delicate and it was sweet. Remus tasted of chocolate and rum, and you let yourself enjoy the moment, you were sure Sirius was intently staring at the both of you, you wondered what he was thinking as you felt the muscles of his tights tense, and relax. As you explored the gentle rhythm of Remus’ kiss, any apprehension dissipated, replaced by a growing sense of ease, even with Sirius staring at the two, it was strangely enjoyable. The gentleness of Remus' lips against yours seemed to resonate both affection and curiosity, you wondered if he was being gentle because that was in his nature, if he was being gentle because it was you he was kissing, or perhaps because you were in the middle of a dare, and that’s what would be expected of him. 

Eventually, the last drop of sand from the hourglass reached the bottom, and it emitted a soft sound. You and Remus finally separated, looking at each other with breaths slightly heavy, both attempting to regain your composure. Once you caught your breath you decided you had to do something to ease the situation, or something. So you channelled your inner Sirius Black and reacted as he would, you smirked; “Well then Remus, thank you for that delightful kiss, love that you put in an effort even if it was just a dare, anyway, who’s next? I really can’t be the only one who keeps kissing everyone around me, can I?” People laughed at your reaction, Remus was shaking his head with a small smile slipping from his lips, maybe he had kissed Sirius in the end. 

Sirius leaned into your ear, whispering “Smooth way to divert the tension luv,” he whispered as Imogen grabbed a paper, and you gulped as Sirius' breath brushed your neck. 

“It’s me,” said Imogen, still processing how you’d been so brave to kiss a boy while sitting on another’s lap. She wanted to be like you when she grew older “It says: If you could be anyone in this room, who would it be?” She seemed to think about it for a second “I mean… right at this moment? (Y/N), she’s gotten the most action tonight.” 

You laughed, reclining against Sirius unconsciously, “Well, then, switch with me,” you told her as a joke, but you felt Sirius’ hold tighten, as if reproachful. 

Peter leaned in for a paper “Give your best friend a lap dance.” He read. “What?! Who wrote this?” You laughed, at least you hadn’t gotten that one.  

“Get up Jaaaames,” you heard Sirius say in a sing-song voice from behind. He pulled a chair with magic to the centre of the circle and set the record player to “Love to Love You Baby” by Donna Summer. 

James sat on the chair with a smile as Peter stood up, walking in front of James and started to dance. Peter was not vibing with the song or the dare for that matter. But he pulled through, even with Sirius’ constant teasing “Come on Pete, you’re not getting tips tonight if you don’t put in an effort!” 

You eventually joined the teasing too, whistling as Sirius continued talking. Once the song was over Peter went instantly back to his place, hiding his entire face between his hands and questioning all the life decisions that had led him to that moment. 

There was only one paper left, and it was James' turn. He leaned in and grabbed the truth paper “Have you ever had a crush on anyone in this circle?” He read, and then he nodded “Of course I have. But you all know who it is already.” 

Lily coughed several times “Well, game’s over,” she said as she stood up and pulled Marlene towards the fire with her “We should sleep soon, so go ahead, time to open the gifts.”

Marlene raised an eyebrow at her, she just shrugged. You, like the good friend you were, decided to tease her further, finally leaving Sirius’ lap and walking behind her “Wow, Lils, never seen you run from a situation faster than that.” 

“Shut it, luv.” She Told you and pulled you to sit on the sofa, the rest followed you seconds after, all walking towards the comfortable living room-like setup in front of the sofa. Once everyone was comfortable, Beth urged Marlene to sit on the rug in front of everyone to open her gifts. She’d gotten a quill set from her parents, a magical chess set, an enchanted journal, some fun jewellery, the Jersey you’d gotten her and many other things. 

You all sat comfortably in front of the fire as she continued opening her gifts.   

You leaned down next to her when she opened a box with bright red wrapping “Is that quidditch polish set?” You asked with a smile “That’s brilliant!” 

“Thanks,” said James, of course, he would have been the one to give her that “now you can be the fastest beater.” 

Sirius looked at him with a shrug and hit him on the arm with the back of his hand in a reproachful manner “Way to drag your friend down, mate!”

“Hmmm… there’s only one way to find out,” Marlene said with a shrug “A race…” she smirked at the last bit. 

You looked at her and then back at Sirius, eyebrows raised slightly and nodding along with Marlene “AND you know, Sirius Black does owe me race…” 

He looked at you with an amused look on his face, his eyes shining at the dare “You’re on.” 

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A/N: I swear this has been one of my favourite chapters to write so far. What was our dear Sirius thinking when he stared at you? What was Remus thinking? So much drama I love this sm. Some interesting things are coming soon, stay tuned lovelies <3