#I saw dead apple in theaters

[catsxratsxbats]

I've been in the bsd fandom for uuuuuh *checks notes* 8 years. Hello mentally ill lgbt community

[lycanlovingvampyre]

MAG 154 Relisten

Activity on my first listen: apple cutting + sitting thrilled on the couch.

Ah yes, I remember it so clearly when I heard that episode the first time. I was almost done cutting apples, but I didn't quite feel satisfied after MAG 152 and 153, those are statement that were a bit subtle for me. So I thought "Okay, I'll give one more episode a shot" (even though the episode title didn't sound particularly interest-piquing) and then it’s a Gertrude tape and I had some problems following a lot of Gertrude statements before, I don't know, her voice makes me sleepy xD And I was already prepared to drift away during this episode again and felt a bit demotivated. But I kept going. Well, best fucking decision ever. As soon as I realized she's reading from the Catalogue of the Trapped Dead I was like "Ohhhhh!"

JON: "And I started to pay attention to the ones I… wasn’t drawn to. The tapes I instinctively wanted to discard." That's very clever, go against what the Eye wants!

JON: "There was one, this one, that my hand… pulled back from. I dropped it, twice, when I went to pick it up." Lol, that actually sounds funny. Like "Whoops! I dropped it... Woaa, dropped it again, ahaha, clumsy me."

JON: "I am the avatar of awful knowledge and revealed secrets." Oh Jon, you theater kid!

GERTRUDE: "“When he opened his eyes, he of course saw nothing" Ok, she already read that part and still couldn't guess what was necessary to quit. Already talked about this in MAG 111 - because of this I think those memory-ghosts of the Catalogue work like the appearances of people plugged into the Matrix, a mental projection of their self. How they most liked seeing themselves. So when it comes to depicting Book!Eric, I think he'd still have intact eyes. Cause he says he "destroyed them completely", I can't imagine how one could not see that, if the appearance is the same as in the moment of death.

I love how similar Eric and Gerry sound, and I don't think it's because of the ghostly echo. After all, we do have a recording of Gerry without that effect. Very good VA choice!

ERIC: "I know that I’m not really Eric; I’m just a memory someone wrote down. It hurts, most of the time." Primarily it's probably meant to be an effect of the Catalogue's nature, of the Fears just doing their job. But I guess the knowledge of not actually being you also makes it weird and uncomfortable. Sometimes I think about that, like what are we anyway? Isn't the memory of oneself's entire life basically what makes one that particular person (+ hardwired personality probably)? Because it still matters on which hardware we run. Otherwise, how would we explain body dysphoria?

ERIC: "You too. (beat) You got old." GERTRUDE: "Better than being dead." ERIC: (short sigh of a laugh) "Fair enough. To be honest, I’m impressed, more than anything. Hard to get old in this business. You either die, or you, uh, stay young. (short, uncomfortable pause) …How did Mary look?" GERTRUDE: (same sort of short laugh) "She got old, too." Well, let's see, this is in 2008. My educated guess from MAG 35 was that Gerry was born sometime around 1983 or 1984. Perhaaaps 1985 when we'll go with the most extreme numbers from MAG 35. We don't know when exactly Mary killed Eric, Eric says he left the Archives months before she killed him. So, Eric died.. what? 1984 or 1985? So he hasn't seen Gertrude in over 20 years! He probably saw Mary a few times since she summoned him to bounce off ideas of him. But even if she kept doing that for a few years and then stopped, 15 years would still be a long time with visible changes^^

ERIC: "And Gerry? Have you seen my son?" Nawwww... He actually calls him Gerry, like he always wanted friends (and probably loved ones) to call him.

ERIC: "Yeah, it doesn’t feel great. But being dead, I s’pose you don’t feel things quite as strongly. Little bit – flat." Ha, flat like a piece of paper!

ERIC: "Elias? Elias Bouchard, seriously?!" GERTRUDE: "Hm, he’s changed a lot." <.<

GERTRUDE: "So. What did they not want me to know?" ERIC: "I quit." GERTRUDE: "You – Sorry, you quit?" ERIC: "Yeah. I figured out how." Well, on my first listen I was sitting at the edge of the sofa at that point, staring wide-eyed at the TMA logo in the YT video on screen.

ERIC: "You know, you were never actually all that nice to me when I worked for you, Gertrude. Not like Michael, or Emma." Hahahaha, very good, let her dangle a bit! I'd like to say I'd do the same but I know that in the end I never want to give people, one: what they did to me, and two: something they could hold against me in return.

Eric: "I don’t know what she saw in me, not really." Not-really counter of S4: 20!

ERIC: "You were almost there, you know, with your theory that James could watch us from any eye, even an illustration. What did you do? How did you sever that link?" GERTRUDE: "My God!" Yeah, at that point I said "Fuuuuck" out loud... My spouse was sitting on the couch next to me was like ?? and I just kept saying "Fuck" over and over again. First: Eyes are one of the body parts I find the most horrific... I can watch every body horror torture splatter movie without problems but when it's about eyes... Fuck off! If I'd be in that position I'd be like "Yeah, you know what, I actually like the Archives! Screw that, y'all go ahead and do what you must do, but keep me out of it." Second, I love moments like this in fiction! The last one like this I remember was when I read The Last Wish (The Witcher) by Sapkowski, specifically The Lesser Evil. When that innkeeper (or whatever that guy was) explained what happened in Tridam and it dawned on me what Renfri was about to do (just like it dawned on Geralt in that moment. I love having the same reaction like characters. When I can discover huge things alongside them).

[TAPE CLICKS ON.] [JON SIGHS HEAVILY.] JON: "Fuck." [TAPE CLICKS OFF.] Yah, same...

JON: "I know. I know what you said, but I just – (inhale) I think I’ve found a way for us to leave the Institute." [BRIEF PAUSE.] MARTIN: "O-kay…?" JON: "Yeah. But it’s – (heavy inhale) It’s pretty drastic." MARTIN: (hah) "What, you going to gouge your eyes out, or something?" [BEAT.] MARTIN: (gets it) "Fuck off!" Such an iconic piece of dialogue xD

MARTIN: "Erm… like, I mean… permanently? Or…" This has the same energy as answering "In general?" to the question of "Haven't seen a dog, have you?"... Those idiots^^

JON: "But we could leave here, you and me. Escape." Eeek <3

JON: (squawk) "Uh, I, I don’t know. I don’t – know. But… maybe it’s worth it? The risk – y-you and me, together, getting out of here –" [MARTIN SNIFFS.] JON: "– one way or another." MARTIN: "Jon." Double Eeeek <3

So what's going on here has a name, URST or UST. It stands for UnResolved Sexual Tension, although I don't like that term cause it's just as well used for unresolved romantic tension. Especially when we're talking about a couple with an ace character, or when it's used in a show for minors about minors (Miraculous is a textbook example). So basically it's a trope to keep suspense going on by having all kinds of obstacles to keep the love interests from actually getting together, usually also having them pine after each other over and over again + once in a while giving them a scene in which it looks like they finally get somewhere. Full disclosure: I'm a sucker for that trope. I loved that in Inu Yasha, I love this in Miraculous (although it's getting a bit destroyed by all the What-if-episodes with a subsequent time reset or memory wipe) and of course I love it in TMA.

JON: "I mean, whatever their plan is for me, I am damn sure that doing that isn’t it. I’d derail everything – we could derail everything, and then just – leave!" Time travel fix-it for TMA is extremely difficult because you basically have these powerful forces which had it all planned out. I think there are actually two points in TMA where it could really take a very different turn. One of them is here. If Jon blinds himself, he won't belong to the Eye anymore and can't complete the ritual. And given what Annabelle says in MAG 197 it sounds like Jon will even survive being cut off from the Eye. (There’s of course still the problem of just going ahead with a new Archivist, so it’s only a temporary resolve...)

MARTIN: "Nothing; It’s just – (one more laugh) It’s just ironic, that’s all." That's totally in the sense of "At any time before taking Peter's deal I would have run away with you in a heartbeat. But back then you never came to me and now when you do it's me who won't do it"-ironic, right?

@a-mag-a-day

[culturalgeekgirl]

If I see one more post about Goncharov that criticizes another person’s take like “Did they watch a totally differnet movie” I am going to go insane Like, they probably literally did Do we not know the thing? about the reels? This is part of why Goncharov was lost media for so long. Yes there were a bunch of rival investors who all had claims, including maybe some mafia fronts sure, but that was honestly not that unusual at the time and that isn’t what caused The Problem. So: the copies of Goncharov that were held in private collections, or in storage in individual theaters, they all had the same first reel. But the second reels had huge variations, largely converging on similar third reels that still contained some major plot divergences. (This is a bit of a simplification, I’m saying “three reels” because it’s how the problem is usually discussed, but that’s not precisely accurate. Back in the 70s and 80s, films were shipped around in 6-8 mini reels, which projectionist would splice together into 1-3 big reels that they’d put in the tray to run in sequence on the projector. But since most of what we have today is the already-spliced together projection reels, that’s how it’s talked about. There’s a whole alternate school of thought that one of the major releases isn’t just a tighter edit, it’s MISSING an entire mini reel (4? 5? this is where I get lost tbh) I’m loosely remembering an explanation I saw on a film collector’s forum sometime in the early 2000s. I am not an authority on the number of mini reels/cans/whatever.) Anyway, various edits had been licensed out to different regional distributors, and nobody could tell who owned the rights to which version of the movie. There were a bunch of companies that knew they had the ability to distribute SOME version of Goncharov, but not, definitively, WHICH version. You’d assume these were regional edits for different markets with different rating and cultural standards, but multiple different versions of the film ended up circulating in every region. For years, none of these companies were willing to take the financial risk of releasing something if there was a chance another film company would be able to come forward and show proof that actually THEY owned the version with the apple scene at 35:02 or whatever. The Russian distro company was the first one to release a digitized version, as far as I know, I guess because the distributors were like “what are they even going to do to us?” and piracy wasn’t exactly taboo in the early Russian DVD market. With Scorsese involved you’d think the US one would have been easy to wrangle but iirc the studio that technically owned the rights had been in like three mergers so it took a while to sort things out by the time home video had become popular. Still that’s why you might have caught a TV edit in the late 80s? I had a friend that had a VHS version she’d taped off some channel that was full of commercials but still included all the swears and murders. That’s how I watched it for the first time - pan and scan baby! Side note: this is what the ending of Clue is riffing on: the fact that even in the US you could never be sure what ending of Goncharov you’d see when you went into the theater. Like almost every joke in Clue, I did not get this joke as a kid. afaik film preservationists are still looking for Matteo’s director’s cut, but I have no idea how they’d know it if they found it. I’d link to sources but all these forums are long dead and poorly cached, so you get my loose recollection instead.

[acemapleeh]

Tag Game To Better Know You! Send this to people you’d like to know better!

Thank you @fizzycherrycola and @hetagrammy for tagging me <3

What book are you currently reading?

Currently, and very slowly, making my way through How to be a Victorian. I haven't had a lot of free time to be able to read as much as would want to this year. I hope next year when I change my job, I'll find something that gives me more time to do so.

What’s your favourite movie you saw in theatres this year?

I'm like, trying to reach back in my mind all the movies I've seen this year in theaters. The Menu was a really fun watch for the most recent thing I watched. Bullet Train was also a ride, pun intended. I'm trying to remember what I watched in theaters versus at home and honestly, I think I watched a lot of movies that were released this year at home.

What do you usually wear?

In warm or hot weather, t-shirt, cargo shorts and flip flops. In cold weather, loose cut jeans, t-shirt, flannel, hoodie, and either converse or boots.

How tall are you?

As tall as Arthur's canon height.

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event?

Capricorn and I share a birthday with the day the Treaty of Ghent ended the War of 1812

Do you go by your name or a nick-name?

Irl I go by my real name but everywhere online I go by Ace

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?

Nope :) I wanted to either be a marine biologist or an author. I'm a 5th-grade teacher and my life has been in constant stress and pain since.

Are you in a relationship? If not, who is your crush if you have one?

Yes, I am happily married 💗

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?

What am I good at: retrieving information and remembering trivial knowledge, writing, making quick and stupid memes, singing, and point-and-click adventure games

What I'm bad at: cooking, effectively communicating my feelings and wants and needs, any sort of physical activity, drawing, knowing any brand or type of car like help me, and telling when people are lying

Dogs or cats?

Cats 🐈

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favourite picture/favourite line/favourite etc. from something you created this year?

Honestly, my favorite piece I've written this year was Come Ashore for Rack and Ruin, like, I feel like the whole piece just came together and felt really good to write. Same with the second chapter of Dreams of Philadelphia. These are my favorite lines from them respectively:

Matthew didn’t fall anywhere special, he didn’t stand out amongst any of the other dead Canadian soldiers that Alistair finally stumbled across. His body lay upright and Alistair risked a precious second to push the lad’s goggles to his forehead to reveal glossed-over, grey-blue eyes staring towards the heavens; maybe the lingering spirit of Matthew could see it a little clearer now. Like everyone, he was covered in gore and mud. Alistair didn’t think the lad could be any quieter than he already was. Silent as a church mouse now quiet as a Catholic grave.

A place Alfred had long associated with life and freedom, one of the birthplaces of who he was reeked of death. Open windows that once lead way to cheerful laughter and freshly made apple butter now let the souls of the dead pass through as well as the stench of decay.

What’s something you would like to create content for?

A dream would be to write something similar to the American Girl books, some good historical fiction for a younger audience to get young readers interested in history but not just for America but for other countries as well.

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with?

Other than Hetalia? Furthering continuing my downfall of being a 2012 tumblr entity by rewatching Doctor Who.

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

Honestly speaking my job. I was really looking forward to working at a school as an assistant and was proud to have been offered a higher position early on. I wanted to do well. I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to help teach these kids. Every step I take feels like a punishment like I made the wrong choice of what I'm doing.

What’s a hidden talent of yours?

Is being good at the Sims count? Like, I'm really good at decorating interiors and making Sims. Where on my resume can I put that I'm good at creating characters as well as aesthetic image boards.

The only thing I've surprised my wife with doing is being really good at handling all sorts of watercraft such as a jetski and kayak.

Are you religious?    

Not really, no.

What’s something you wish to have at this moment?

An electric blanket, hot coffee, and a new pair of slippers. You cannot put a Californian in weather below 50 degrees.

I’m going to tag some folks to do this if they so wish: @the-phoenix-heart @the-aph-circus @senditothemoonn @myrddin-wylt @crumpled--notes

[loosejournal]

Cowpunk by Diane Seuss

Do you think your suffering is exceptional? Maybe. Maybe not. The times are strange, no doubt. In the heat of it, what I believed was the heat of it, I shouted like a dockworker that I was unafraid. Come at me,

I hollered, you can only kill me once. There is nothing left to take. I’ve said that before. I still hear the echo from when the flames licked my feet, my fearlessness a cabaret.

Of course, there is more to take. I’m copious and so are you. My pipe. My roses. My stubborn mule. My burbling brook which must be traversed to get to the island of blue lawn chairs.

My loaded apple trees, raspberry bushes, and prefab on a slab, and memories of Petra, with three teeth, who made a salsa just for me when she saw me coming toward her diner, Petra’s. My high school drama

teacher, Jim, his hair bronze, his pallor ruddy, his gait exceptional. I believe we should marry, he said to me one night, blowing smoke rings, driving me home from play practice. I was Mary Warren in The Crucible. I’d just learned

to insert a tampon. There were no boundaries then, and Jim was queer. His real love was the boy who played The Boy in The Fantasticks. I could feel my blood let down like breast milk into the fabric

of his car seat. I loved the theater. What luxury, putting on plays in the middle of a cornfield. The witch I played giving me license to go into fits in front of the student body.

Jim was fired, and died. Petra’s dead. The berry bushes are a dream. The island is a pipe dream. The pipe is a hallucination. Still, I’m copious, and so are you.

[moonmanager]

Treasure island movie

He discovers that Silver hired his old shipmates, and all of them are pirates from Captain Flint’s crew. Once on the ship, Captain Smollett expresses misgivings about the crew, especially since their “secret” voyage appears to be common knowledge.Īfter days at sea, Jim is sitting in an apple barrel when he overhears Silver and the crew planning a mutiny. The Squire hires Captain Smollett and his ship for the expedition, and hires a cook, Long John Silver, who befriends Jim and claims he can rally up a crew. Jim shares the treasure map with the Doctor and the Squire, and the Squire at once declares the three of them must go on a voyage to uncover the treasure. By the time Jim returns with Doctor Livesey and Squire Trelawney, however, the pirates have already looted the tavern and Bones is found dead. Bones knows the pirates are after his treasure map, so he gives it to Jim for safekeeping while Jim goes to fetch help. The second pirate hands Bones a black spot-a mark of death. While young Jim Hawkins is looking after the tavern his mother runs, two different pirates come looking for William Bones, a sickly man who’s been hiding there. (Feel free to skip ahead to our review.) Synopsis In case you fell asleep part way through, here’s a quick synopsis of the story. Treasure Island is the thirteenth movie in our Disnerd Movie Challenge, and after watching it last night we have a few thoughts to share. The apple barrel scene with young Jim trying to avoid being skewered by Silver's knife made my kids scream, and what more can you ask from a kid's movie than a good, safe scare? This is a must have movie for any serious video collection.Arg, ya mateys! Welcome back to this here blog. The story is a little long in the tooth, but the key points, such as the delivery of the black spot by Blind Pew, and the recapture of the Hispaniola, are still tense and exciting, even to a generation weaned on Stargate and Spiderman. The last time I viewed it was probably about ten years ago when my youngest child was still a pre-teen, and Newton's performance as the quintessential rogue who can slit your throat without a qualm while you are laughing at one of his jokes was just as impressive to me when I was 50 as when I was 10. (apparently it also impressed Richard Dreyfuss, who does an homage to Newton's Long John in 'Jaws'). I saw this flick fifty years ago, when it was first run in the theaters, and it left an indelible impression in my memory. Robert Newton, however, is the definitive Long John Silver. The Charlton Heston version has the advantage of a wonderful Chieftains soundtrack, and some richer production values than were possible in 1954, but somehow Heston never comes across as the kind of man who could weld a band of misfits, convicts, perverts, murderers and general misanthropes into a functioning pirate crew.

Wallace Beery is always worth watching, and his black and white version has many strong points, but he never quite convinces me that he is the black hearted devil who is second only to Captain Flint himself in his cruelty. I'm not sure if this is the cinematic version which best captures the ethos of Robert Louis Stevenson's book, but it is the version which provides the best movie experience for the viewer, and probably the film that most people think of whenever some one mentions Treasure Island.

[docrotten]

[Horror News] Tim Burton’s WEDNESDAY, Apple’s GODZILLA, Romero’s DAWN OF THE DEAD, and more

Welcome to HORROR NEWS RADIO for AUGUST 22, 2022. JOIN THE GRUE-CREW FOR casting news for the MONSTERVERSE TV series heading to Apple+, along with trailer news for Tim Burton's WEDNESDAY series on NETFLIX. All this, and more, coming up next…

I am your host Doc Rotten and this is HNR, the official GRUESOME MAGAZINE HORROR NEWS podcast. Back with me again are the scariest, goriest, bloodiest co-hosts on the 'Net.

Dave Dreher, the lead news writer at Gruesome Magazine

Crystal Cleveland, the Livin6dead6irl

And Vanessa, Podcasting Rock Star and International Cosplay Queen

UPCOMING FILMS

Regal Theaters Brings George A. Romero's DAWN OF THE DEAD back to theaters this Halloween… NOW IN 3-D!

https://rue-morgue.com/romeros-dawn-of-the-dead-is-returning-to-theaters-in-3d-for-halloween

What to watch this weekend (August 26), you ask…

THE INVITATION from Screen Gems heads to theaters

A young woman is courted and swept off her feet, only to realize a gothic conspiracy is afoot.

d. Jessica M. Thompson

cast. Nathalie Emmanuel , Thomas Doherty, Stephanie Corneliussen, Sean Pertwee

MANEATER from Saban Films heads to VOD

After an accident during their vacations on a paradisiac island, a group of friends is stalked by a large shark.

d. Justin Lee

cast: Nicky Whelan, Trace Adkins, Shane West

ALIENOID from Well Go USA heads to limited theaters

The door of time opens between the swordsman who wants to seize the legendary divine sword at the end of the Goryeo Dynasty and those who chase after an alien prisoner imprisoned in a human body in 2022.

d. Dong-hoon Choi

WATCHER streams on SHUDDER beginning August 26

A young American woman moves with her husband to Bucharest, and begins to suspect that a stranger who watches her from the apartment building across the street may be a local serial killer decapitating women.

cast. Maika Monroe, Karl Glusman, Burn Gorman

CASTING NEWS

Mari Yamakoto joins the cast of Legendary's Apple Live-Action MONSTERVERSE series AKA the Untitled Apple/Godzilla and the Titans Project

Set after the battle between Godzilla and the Titans, revealing that monsters are real, follows one family's journey to uncover its buried secrets and a legacy linking them to Monarch.

previously announced series regulars Anna Sawai, Ren Watabe, Kiersey Clemons, Joe Tippett, Elisa Lasowski, Kurt Russell, and Wyatt Russell.

https://deadline.com/2022/08/mari-yamamoto-apple-series-legendary-monsterverse-1235095697/

TRAILERS

WEDNESDAY heads to NETFLIX this OCTOBER

starring Jenna Ortega in the title role, alongside Catherine Zeta-Jones, Luis Guzman, Gwendoline Christie, Christina Ricci

  FEEDBACK

Don Joe: Doc is going beast mode with the beard! Haha!  I do enjoy this new News segment and wish I'd discovered you guys sooner. Saw 10 - bring it on, I love this series so much.  I'd love a reboot (not happening, I know) to bring John Kramer back. I'm down with any King adaptation, no matter how good or bad it turns out, they're always interesting. All of those new streaming films look good but since I've never seen Orphan and ending got spoiled for me, I'm looking forward to watching them both now. Lisa Frankenstein - love the many takes on this story and how it has become it's own sub-genre of horror. GDT's COC (lol) - amazing, looks so good and makes me extra excited for my fav time of year.

Thank you for hanging out with the Grue-Crew. Be sure to hit the LIKE, SUBSCRIBE buttons, or Share with a Friend. Every click counts.

Check out this episode!

[antidisneyinc]

Top 10 Embarrassing ‘The Batman’ Things

I drafted this a couple days ago when I saw it and I guess at least enough people have sat for this 3 hour long empty fanboy vehicle that I can go ahead and post

I was ready to enjoy this movie at the very least for its cast but it honest to god just made me really embarrassed for them. so here’s my personal catharsis list of cringe The Batman moments, spoilers under the cut obviously:

Paul Dano’s Riddler giving the most hilarious over the top PSYCHO!!1!#!!! performance perhaps of all time. People at my (male fanboy dominated) screening were cracking up BEFORE he even took off his mask, and by the time he started squeaking ave maria (no joke) most of the theater was in uncomfortable stitches. People are going to defend it saying ‘he’s supposed to be a cringe internet radical” but there is no way that we were supposed to find the serial killer antagonist this ridiculous and I cannot wait for the meme clips

Colin Ferrell looking like the goblin king the whole time and being the ugly punchline. Just hire actors who are the size you want next time instead of making grotesque prostheses for a laugh

The DARK DARK DARK GRITTY tone being undermined constantly by how fucking silly Reeves’ universe is. Batman tampers with every crime scene so much it’s a joke by the end. They hold off on arresting him like ten times despite his name appearing on every dead body. Also every “grisly” moment is completely censored or omitted for the rating which makes characters being horrified at things just really funny and anticlimactic

Everything just being weirdly awkward, as movies tend to be nowadays now that test screenings drive the edit. Even the batmobile reveal is super weird, with the car stuttering and stopping. Literally not a single crowdpleasing moment to be found that wasn’t undercut by uncomfortable and hollow filmmaking

The Wayne family plot. There are 3 scenes back to back where bruce just listens to different people telling him different backstory on thomas and martha wayne who were apparently scandalous political figures for some reason. It could’ve just been ‘thomas wayne was yknow a capitalist’ but instead is some weird thing with martha being institutionalized and thomas having mob connections, it takes up like 45 minutes

The copaganda, as always. Singling out the “bad apples” and revealing that there’s a whole bunch of ““good cops”” who the mob bosses couldn’t bribe is supposed to be a gotcha moment

Matt Reeves’ Rian Johnson aura when he tries to inject some social commentary in the form of catwoman calling out the “rich white privileged assholes” only to be wrong and vengeful, actually

On that note, the endlessly infantilizing Revenge is Bad Actually theme, played for the billionth time on cinema’s largest violin and with selina kyle as the naive, damaged would-be killer

Uncomfortable laughs at my showing were second only to exasperated breaths as the movie just. Kept going. Like a solid hour too long. A guy in a batman shirt in front of me who’d been riveted around the one hour mark cried finally as the credits rolled and didn’t bother to stay for a credits scene

Last but not least the embarrassing requisite Joker tease at the end, like this is just any run of the mill trash DC movie. Which it is

hope that helps :) 

[writerchic6]

What would you want to see in American malls today?

Hey y’all my local mall is up for sale and my county commissioner is working to find ideas for what they can do to reinvigorate the complex.  It’s been dying for years and only the movie theatre there is really worth going to, if that.  I’ve said for a while that I wish that malls would be really cool again like you see in 80s and early 2000s movies.

The Starcourt Mall scene in Stranger Things was like the greatest thing I’ve ever seen and the irony is that mall isn’t too far from me and it’s absolutely deserted in irl and was sold as county offices for only a few million dollars cuz thats all it was worth.  And I went to that mall once as a kid.

As a 20 something I do remember when my local malls were a place to be, and while some malls are still more active than others I think overall the mall scape as a whole could do with a an overhaul and actually be a place to be again.

I know that people say online shopping killed malls, but they’ve been on the decline much longer than this recent amazon boom.  With the popularity of retro things, Mallcore and and dying mall aesthetics, I think theres a real market to appeal to more young people and give communities a better place to hang out than just the sad dregs that are left with just a few junk stores.

My mom has often talked about how malls in the 80s and 90s were almost an all day experience.  There were movie theaters, hair salons etc (in more upscale malls those still exist) but there other things like bookstores, music/record stores, and arcades.

I also know theres a big difference between American suburban malls and shopping centers in Europe etc.  Theres plenty of shops along side larger department stores.

What are malls like in Europe as well??

My Mall Ideas

I think malls should try to compete with online retailers like amazon but do what they were originally designed to do: be a central community pedestrian space for the suburbs with shopping but can also have resources for the community the same way libraries etc provide just on a much larger scale.

Have recreational centers/areas in place of department stores that have left

internet cafes/study spaces

bookstores (like Walden books use to be in malls)

ARCADES (not just game stop but actual arcades/gaming stores like tabletop games)

Pop/sub culture stores (not just hot topic and box lunch, but definitely have both of those and other like it with even a wider array of stuff)

RECORD/MUSIC STORES!!

technology co-op or radio shack like store where you can get basic device help or purchase a new/second hand one (side eyes apple and its genius bar)

thrift stores

independent stores or boutiques

80s mall aesthetics

I think the appeal of malls is both their central accessibility and the experience of going out to the place. I think this is best exhibited by Target. I think i saw an article or post of the internet that said that the draw of buying something from Target is literally do the experience of shopping there. You go because of the feeling of experience as well as getting the things you need. Almost like a miniature mall, with books, an entertainment section, groceries and starbucks/pizza right at the door. Malls could be like this or more.

TL:DR

Malls are dead and i have a chance to help improve the one in my area. What would you want to see in a mall today? 80s mall culture? arcades?

If you know of malls that have been turned into different things (like it think there's this giant bookstore in texas that use to be a mall) please let me know in the replies

Please reblog and reply, and spread as you can

Thank you! 😊

[lycanlovingvampyre]

MAG 154 Relisten

Ah yes, I remember it so clearly when I heard that episode the first time. I was almost done cutting apple, but I didn't quite feel satisfied after MAG 152 and 153, those are statement that were a bit subtle for me. So I thought "Okay, I'll give one more episode a shot" (even though the episode title didn't sound particularly interest-piquing) and then it starts with Gertrude and I had some problems following a lot of Gertrude statements, I don't know, her voice makes me sleepy xD And I was already prepared to drift away during this episode again and was a bit demotivated. But I kept going. Well, best fucking decision ever. As soon as I realized she's reading from the Cataloque of the Trapped Dead I was like "Oh?"

JON: "And I started to pay attention to the ones I… wasn’t drawn to. The tapes I instinctively wanted to discard." That's very clever, go against what the Eye wants!

JON: "There was one, this one, that my hand… pulled back from. I dropped it, twice, when I went to pick it up." Lol, that actually sounds funny. Like "Whoops! I dropped it... Woaa, dropped it again, ahaha, clumsy me."

JON: "I am the avatar of awful knowledge and revealed secrets." Oh Jon, you theater kid!

GERTUDE: "“When he opened his eyes, he of course saw nothing" Ok, she already read that part and still couldn't guess, what was necessary to quit. Already talked about this in MAG 111, but because of this I think those memory-ghosts of the Catalogue work like the appearances of people plugged into the Matrix, a mental projection of their self. How they most liked seeing themselves. So when it comes to depicting Eric, I think he'd still have intact eyes. Cause he says he "destroyed them completely", I can't imagine how one could not see that, if the appearance is the same as in the moment of death.

I love how similar Eric and Gerry sound, and I don't think it's because of the ghostly echo. I do have a recording of Gerry without that effect. Very good VA choice!

ERIC: "I know that I’m not really Eric; I’m just a memory someone wrote down. It hurts, most of the time." Primarily it's probably meant to be an effect of the Catalogue's nature, of the Fears just doing their job. Put I guess the knowledge of not actually being you also makes it weird. Then again, what are we anyway? Isn't the memory of oneself's entire life basically what makes one that particular person? And still, it matters on which hardware we run. Otherwise, how would we explain body dysphoria?

ERIC: "You too. (beat) You got old." GERTRUDE: "Better than being dead." ERIC: (short sigh of a laugh) "Fair enough. To be honest, I’m impressed, more than anything. Hard to get old in this business. You either die, or you, uh, stay young. (short, uncomfortable pause) …How did Mary look?" GERTRUDE: (same sort of short laugh) "She got old, too." Well, let's see, this is in 2008. My educated guess from MAG 35 was that Gerry was born sometime around 1983 or 1984. Perhaaaps 1985 when we'll go with the most extreme numbers from MAG 35. We don't know when Mary killed Gerry, Eric says he left the Archives months before she killed him. So, Eric died.. what? 1984 or 1985? So he hasn't seen Gertrude in over 20 years! He probably saw Mary a few times since she summoned him to bounce off ideas of him. But even if she kept doing that for a few years and then stopped, 15 years would still be a long time with visible changes^^

ERIC: "And Gerry? Have you seen my son?" Nawwww... He actually calls him Gerry, like he always wanted to.

ERIC: "Yeah, it doesn’t feel great. But being dead, I s’pose you don’t feel things quite as strongly. Little bit – flat." Ha, like a piece of paper!

ERIC: "Elias? Elias Bouchard, seriously?!" GERTRUDE: "Hm, he’s changed a lot." <.<

GERTRUDE: "So. What did they not want me to know?" ERIC: "I quit." GERTRUDE: "You – Sorry, you quit?" ERIC: "Yeah. I figured out how." Well, at that point I was sitting at the edge of the sofa staring wide eyed at the TMA logo in the YT video of screen.

ERIC: "You know, you were never actually all that nice to me when I worked for you, Gertrude. Not like Michael, or Emma." Hahahaha, very good, let her dangle a bit! I'd like to say I'd do the same but I know that in the end I never want to give people one, what they did to me, and two, something which they could hold against me.

Eric: "I don’t know what she saw in me, not really." Not-really counter of S4: 20!

ERIC: "You were almost there, you know, with your theory that James could watch us from any eye, even an illustration. What did you do? How did you sever that link?" GERTRUDE: "My God!" Yeah, at that point I said "Fuuuuck" out loud... My spouse was sitting on the couch next to me was like ?? and I just kept saying "Fuck" over and over again. First: Eyes are one of the body parts I find the most horrific... I can watch every body horror torture splatter movie wihout problems but when it's about eyes... Fuck off! If I'd be in that position I'd be like "Yeah, you know what, I actually like the Archives! Screw that, y'all go ahead and do what you must do but keep me out of it." Second, I love moments like this in fiction! The last one like this I remember when I read The Last Wish (The Witcher) by Sapkowski, specifically The Lesser Evil. When that innkeeper (or whatever that guy was) explained what happened in Tridam and it dawned on me what Renfri was about to do (just like it dawned on Geralt in that moment. I love having the same reaction like characters, when I can discover huge things alongside them).

[TAPE CLICKS ON.] [JON SIGHS HEAVILY.] JON: "Fuck." [TAPE CLICKS OFF.] Yah, same...

JON: "I know. I know what you said, but I just – (inhale) I think I’ve found a way for us to leave the Institute."[BRIEF PAUSE.]

MARTIN: "O-kay…?"

JON: "Yeah. But it’s – (heavy inhale) It’s pretty drastic."

MARTIN: (hah) "What, you going to gouge your eyes out, or something?"

[BEAT.]

MARTIN: (gets it) "Fuck off!"

Such an iconic piece of dialogue xD

MARTIN: "Erm… like, I mean… permanently? Or…"

This has the same energy as answering "In general?" to the question of "Haven't seen a dog, have you?"

JON: "But we could leave here, you and me. Escape."

Eeek <3

JON: (squawk) "Uh, I, I don’t know. I don’t – know. But… maybe it’s worth it? The risk – y-you and me, together, getting out of here –"

[MARTIN SNIFFS.]

JON: "– one way or another."

MARTIN: "Jon."

Double Eeeek <3

So what's going on here has a name, URST or UST. It stands for UnResolved Sexual Tension, although I don't like that term cause it's just as well used for unresolved romantic tension. Especially when we're talking about a couple with an ace character, or when it's used in a show for minors about minors (Miraculous is textbook example). So it's basically a trope to keep suspension going by having all kinds of obstacles to keep the love interests from actually getting together, usually also having them pine after each other over and over again + once in a while giving them a scene in which it looks like they finally get somewhere.

Full disclosure: I'm a sucker for that trope. I loved that in Inu Yasha, I love this in Miraculous (although it's getting a bit destroyed by all there What-if-episodes with a time reset or memory wipe) and of course I love it in TMA.

JON: "I mean, whatever their plan is for me, I am damn sure that doing that isn’t it. I’d derail everything – we could derail everything, and then just – leave!"

Time travel fix-it for TMA is extremely difficult because you basically have these powerfull forces which had it all planned out. I think there are actually two points in TMA where it could really take a very different turn. One of them is here. If Jon blinds himself, he won't belong to the Eye anymore and can't complete the ritual. And given what Annabelle says in MAG 197 it sounds like Jon will even survive being cut off from the Eye.

MARTIN: "Nothing; It’s just – (one more laugh) It’s just ironic, that’s all."

That's totally in the sense of "At any time before taking Peter's deal I would have run away with you in a heartbeat. But back then you never came to me and now when you do it's me who won't do it"-ironic, right?

[aggressive-positivity-network]

Hello! I was wondering if I could get some childhood headcanons for the mercs, thank you!

I’m taking a break from the longer headcanons - I’m finishing all my existing requests before opening up my headcanons back up - so I’ll do this one to get the gears turning. There are two here, but I will do more if prompted:

TF2 Merc Childhood Headcanons

Spy:

Spy was a shy child. Painfully shy.

His family was poor, so he had to steal most necessities. By the time he was twelve, he could hop or climb over most fences and hide in most buildings.

The entire reason he became a spy was seeing poorly translated VHS tapes of American espionage films. Spy was frustrated that he never looked the part - he had no suit, no cigarette, no girls.

But, not to worry, he would get all of those things when he went to Britain for schooling.

As a child, though, all he could do was pretend.

He had a “gun” made out of sticks and rope, mimed having a tie, hat, and overcoat, and drew a few shaky feminine features onto a pillow (whom he dubbed Mademoiselle Coussin).

This change in play actually helped him socially: whenever he felt nervous, he would just pretend he was a spy instead of a petite, messy-haired boy with freckles. This caused his popularity among the street boys to spike, and they were soon at his beck and call.

However, despite his fulfilling life as a street rat, he turned back into that timid mouse of a boy whenever he was home. He never dared use his charm on his parents. He already caught a flogging when he tried slicking his hair back.

This led to an odd, one-sided relationship with life where he put on two different masks for two different places, but could only be his true self when he was alone.

He learned to stifle and release emotions at will (keeping himself from crying when he was hit and then letting the tears flow when he was fooling unsuspecting tourists), and was cynical about any relationship that didn’t benefit him immediately or at all.

Except for one.

Every Christmas, a specific fruit vendor, an elderly man named Lucas, came to town. He would give one piece of fruit, usually an apple or peach, to every child that came to his stand. They never had to pay - they only had to say Merry Christmas.

Spy only hung around the stand for the first few years - his house was so far away that by the time he got there, most of the fruit was gone - but one Christmas, Lucas beckoned him over.

The vendor reached beneath his cart and pulled out a single orange, which happened to be Spy’s favorite.

“Joyeux Noël.”

“J-joyeux Noël, monsieur.”

Lucas held out the orange, which Spy accepted gratefully and held in two tight hands.

“Merci beaucoup, monsieur! Merci, merci!”

Lucas only smiled and waved his hand.

This became a tradition for many more years.

Spy would come to the cart, wish Lucas a warm holiday, and would receive an orange that had been saved for him.

But, one Christmas, Lucas didn’t come. Nor the next one. Or the one after that.

Even though Spy knew he was never going to get an orange from that cart again, he still went to that street every Christmas until he left France.

Now, whenever Spy receives an orange, either as a mandated vitamin supplement or if he happens to steal one from a witness’s house, he puts it in his suit, only eating it in his smoke room.

And if he is feeling particularly nostalgic, he’ll, just like he did when he was a child, eat the peel.

Heavy:

Heavy had a wonderful childhood compared to most of mercs.

His father was only vaguely present - and later absent - but his mother was a huge force in his life.

Though Heavy was never bullied exactly, since he was big even as a child, he was ostracized for his size and general clumsiness.

He often broke things, hurt other kids and even staff, and put holes in the wall simply because he was a pre-schooler in an elementary schooler sized body.

But, no matter how many calls she got from the school, Heavy’s mom knew that he wasn’t violent - all she asked was for him to try and fix what he had broken and apologize to the people he had hurt.

“My child, a bear may be big, but they are strong and beautiful. So are you.”

One day, after a particularly rough week of shattered vases and bruised classmates, Heavy ran from school into a random building, blinded by tears and shame. He ended up ticketless in a large theater, but he was only a child, so no one noticed. They assumed he was just someone’s kid.

He ended up on the roof, breathless and gasping between sobs.

Suddenly, he heard an orchestra beginning to play. He looked through a glass pane built into the roof and gazed at the stage below.

He saw one petite ballerina making her way across the stage, doing a few twirls as she went. Then, a much bigger man, who was almost as big as Heavy’s father was, came from stage right and joined in the dance.

Throughout their performance, Heavy kept wincing, expecting the enormous man to crush the small woman. But he never did. The performer moved with grace and a quickness that the boy didn’t expect.

Something awakened in him - a realization that he too could be nimble, despite his size. As the performance ended, Heavy went back down the stairs, his confidence renewed.

He became fascinated with ballet, and watched tapes of shows over and over again until he knew all the steps by heart. At first, he only moved his feet so his arms wouldn’t break anything. Then, as he grew more controlled, he learned how to dance and step around things.

His mother got less calls home, more and more kids began to trust and like him.

He still wasn’t popular by any means, but at least he could play soccer without breaking someone’s arm.

With that success came interests in all things quick, dainty, and detailed. Heavy learned how to knit, paint, and play a bit of piano. He was never very skilled at any of them except for knitting, he enjoyed practicing his coordination and mitigating his clumsiness.

But, one day, Heavy made the mistake of bringing his knitting to school. It was around Christmas, and he had to finish his sister’s sweater so he could wrap it.

The boys, who now knew that Heavy wouldn’t hurt a fly, started teasing him mercilessly, calling him a sow (female pig), a bitch, an old crone, and all sorts of other nasty names.

Heavy, with growing frustration, said something along the lines of, “Will it be your dead mother, then, who will mend your shirt when you are old? Or will you willingly catch your death?”

What Heavy didn’t know was that one particular child’s mother died a few months ago.

The boy went into a rage, giving Heavy a black eye and a bleeding nose before he finally took him by the underarms and held him away from him like a rabid chihuahua. Finally, the boy tired himself out. The other kids had since run away, not wanting to get in trouble or get beat up by Heavy.

The bully, after finding that he was helpless to the situation, began to cry, letting out all the emotions he had been shoving down in order to save face in front of his abusive father.

Heavy went straight into protective mode, having dealt with his younger sisters and their own grievances. After the bully calmed down a bit, he admitted his feelings, and how awful his circumstances were.

Heavy didn’t say anything much, but just handed him a pair of knitting needles and a ball of yarn. The boy learned to knit that day, and after Christmas, many other abused boys came seeking the same kind of closure and validation.

He made many friends this way, and it pretty much eradicated his bullying problem - so much so that he was pretty much untouchable to anyone looking to make trouble.

Though violence is how Heavy makes his money now, the merc learned from the very beginning that the best way through life is a gentle touch.

[thetorchwoodarchive]

[Image Description: a banner for the Across the Bay Crossover Fics You Didn’t See Coming fest, featuring beach signs on a tropical island, reading “Cardiff by the Sea”, the name of the fest, “authors”, “torchwood” (partially obscured), and “one shots” (partially obscured), and a warning sign where Myfanwy chases a swimmer]

ACROSS THE BAY: CROSSOVER FICS YOU DIDN’T SEE COMING MASTERPOST

Thank you everyone for submitting your crossover and fusion fic  recommendations. Below are all submissions and some of our favorites! 

Is it Insensitive for Me to Say by aliciajazmin (EstherJohnTosh | complete | 2441 | T)

Toshiko Sato and Esther Drummond absolutely will make fun of their boyfriend for deciding to attend an audition, while also attending said audition with him. 

Crossover With: The Outer Worlds 

Golden Apples and Norse Gods (Or How Ianto Got His Groove Back) by blackkat (JackIanto | complete | 1592 | G)

Ianto finds himself back from the dead and, apparently, in the position to double-cross a power-crazed Norse god intent on conquering the Earth by taking out a team of superheroes. Must be a Tuesday.

Crossover With: Avengers/MCU

The Magic of Torchwood by Bella the Strange (JackIanto, IantoJohn, JackOther, Non-Torchwood Ships | wip |  546,512 | T)

The Torchwood team have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Set between Adam and Reset. Rated T because of Jack Harkness, swearing, mature themes, slash etc… it’s Torchwood!

Crossover With: Harry Potter

Welcome to Torchwood by Jackdaw818 (Gen | complete | 1601 | T)

A strange creature behind the Ralphs, a break-in at the Museum of Forbidden Technologies, and visitors in Night Vale. Overall, a slightly unordinary day for Cecil Gershwin Palmer

Crossover With: Welcome to Night Vale

Torchwait for iiiiit by lady-demacabre (Gen | complete | 3k | K+)

When Shawn and Gus are called in on a case for an eccentric collector of alien objects, they get more than what they bargained for. One shot, Psych oriented.

Crossover With: Psych

Theme and Variations by nemo_baker (JackIanto, GwenRhys, OwenKatie | 5817 | T)

Time Agent Jack Harkness is sent back in time to solve the mystery of a mysterious train bombing. The problem is, he only has eight minutes to do it.

Written for Reel Torchwood screening 8 on Livejournal. Movie Prompt: Source Code (2011)

Crossover With: Source Code 

Day Tripper by Croquemboucheballpit (Gement) (JackBessie the Third Doctor’s Car, Bessie the Third Doctor’s CarLightening McQueen (past) | complete | 2360 | M)

Bessie’s like any other companion: far from home, more than she appears, and always up for an adventure.

And Jack Harkness really will seduce anything that moves.

Crossover With: Pixar’s Cars 

An American Volunteer by That_one_kid (SteveBucky, BuckyJackSteve | Complete | 4395 | T)

What if Captain Jack Harkness met Steve & Bucky during the war? What if he ran into them again, present day?

AKA

Captain Jack Harkness and his mission to seduce the two gorgeous, capable soldiers who keep running into him.

Crossover With: Captain America/MCU

Statement #0041708 - Future Sight by Jackdaw816 (Gen | complete | 1690 | T)

Statement of Lisa Hallett regarding a peculiar mirror found at a car boot sale

Crossover With: The Magnus Archives

(Un)Welcome Aboard by Jaune_Chat (Jack | Complete | 4,154 | T)

To make ends meet, Mal listens to a suggestion from Inara than he rent out the other shuttle. She has the perfect candidate, a charming Companion named Jack…

Crossover With: Firefly 

Death and the Definitely-Not-A Maiden by Odsbodkins (JackIanto | Complete | 3,6K | PG-13)

When Jack dies, Death is there to meet him. Every time. Written in 2008 for the Doctor Who Crossover Ficathon. Takes in Torchwood to end S2, Doctor Who to end S3, Discworld to Soul Music.

Crossover With: Discworld 

Remarkable by snowwhiteliar ( JackIanto, IantoLisa | Complete | 20.971 | PG-13)

Summary: Once upon a time, in a small village in a distant province of a peaceful kingdom, there lived a boy called Ianto

Crossover With: Fairy Tales 

Got That Friday Feeling Again by NancyBrown (OwenOther, JackIanto, GwenRhys, GwenOwen | Complete | 18.3K | R)

HELP HELP HELP HELP

I AM TRAPPED IN A TIME BUBBLE

The magic marker all over the nice chintz wallpaper bled and smeared as Owen wrote in increasingly desperate lettering across the walls. Ls and Ps dragged down, wiggly at the end or drawn out in slashed strokes.

He ignored the pounding on the door frame. He’d shoved the wardrobe in front, which always kept Jack out for twenty three and a half minutes. He ignored the sweat and tears and snot dripping down his face, down his mouth. He ignored the high-pitched singing from his own throat, “If you want my future, forget my past,” chanted over and over.

HELP

Crossover With: Groundhog Day

Back, and Back, and Back a Little More (Future Optional) (JackIanto, JennyVastra | Complete |  32591 | M)

Accidentally shot into the past by a time-travelling car, Ianto has to fix his own mistakes or he won't have a future to go back to.

Crossover With: Back to the Future 

Truth, Justice by NancyBrown (SupermanOwen | complete | 414 | M)

The green shit does not work. Warnings: dubcon (AMTDI)

Crossover With: Justice League Unlimited/DCAU/Superman 

Quis Custodiet Ipsos Custodies, or, A Humourous Interlude Between Epics by  copperbadge (Gen | complete | 749 | T)

Ianto neglected to introduce himself as he informed the senior staff that Atlantis was now under the jurisdiction of Torchwood, whatever Torchwood is.

Crossover With: Stargate Atlantis 

Never Have I Ever by  st_aurafina (JackIanto, JackDoctor (past/implied), PepperTony (implied) | complete | 1714 | T)

Written for the prompt Ianto, Donna and Pepper end up at a secretaries'/assistants' conference and have a conversation about their bosses.

Crossover With: Ironman/MCU

Beware the Sparkles by elisi (JackIanto, JackEdwardBella | complete | 4793 | T)

It's terribly simple. The good guys are always stalwart and true, the bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats, and we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies, and everybody lives happily ever after. Oh and Jack has sex with sparkly vampires.

Crossover With: Twilight 

The Death Note Discovery by KaibaGirl007 (JackIanto | complete | 18,992 | T)

“You’ve clearly just got a notebook belonging to some geek, a rather sick geek I’ll give you that, who likes to keep note of people’s deaths.” - Will the team resist the urge to use the Death Note or will one of them give into temptation? 

Crossover With: Death Note 

A Confluence of Personalities by  galaxysoup (JackIanto | complete | 4839 | T)

Conner Kent’s body might be dead, but his soul has apparently decided to take the scenic route.

Crossover With: DC Comics/Young Justice Comics 

Imposters Among Us by  gwendolyncooper (JackIanto, GwenRhys | complete | 9117 | M)

The Torchwood team (+Rhys) are out for a night of fun when they end up on a spaceship with no power, no info, and no crew. Known only as THE SKELD, the team tries to fix the ship and figure out what happened to its previous occupants.

But something out there is killing them.

Something that may be someone they know.

Crossover With: Among Us 

Traitors (Among Us) by princessoftheworlds (JackIanto | complete | 440 | G)

In a happy future, the team plays Among Us, and Ianto suffers.

Crossover With: Among US 

Tagline: I saw the VIDEO. Got the CALL? What Next??? by  BricklingGhost (TeamGwenee) (JackIanto, JackSamara | complete | 2424 | Not Rated)

'Tagline: I saw the VIDEO. Got the CALL? What Next???

Bollocks. That’s just a myth. Some git showing off and claiming to be the one person alive who Samara doesn’t bump off. He’ll be boasting that he’s been chosen to kill Voldemort next.'

When another unsuspecting victim falls foul of the cursed tape, he is pointed towards Captain Jack Harkness as his only hope for salvation.

Crossover With: The Ring

(My God, He Just) Came and Went by  Brokenpitchpipe (SteveBucky | complete | 1591 | M)

It starts on a cold, snowy September night in 1916, on the day Winifred Barnes walks to Doris Lindow’s house to see her new telephone and catches the eye of a handsome young man on the other side of the street. He tips his hat as she sees him, and she flushes scarlet and nods in return.

And nine months later, a little baby boy screams his way into the world.

But that’s not when it starts. Not really.

Crossover With: Captain America/MCU

Beast Inside by Flamingbluepanda (JackIanto, OwenTosh, GwenRhys | complete | 26934 | M)

"Argue with anything else, but don’t argue with your own nature.” - Phillip Pullman

Inside us all, there is an animal that expresses our soul. How would the world change were those animals outside?

Crossover With: His Dark Materials

Rifts and Robots by Paycheckgurl (JackIanto | complete | 3021 | G)

Jack and Ianto’s date at the movies is interrupted by two robots with no theater etiquette.

Crossover With: Mystery Science Theater 3000

The Jack and Ianto Show by Paycheckgurl (JackIanto | WIP | 7392 | T)

Jack and Ianto are a regular couple, living a quiet life, and trying to fit into the quaint Village of West Castle. Sure they're keeping the secret that Jack is an immortal time traveler from the future, with a fantastical machine called a vortex manipulator that can manipulate time and space around them, but they have much more pressing concerns. Such as strict bosses and nosy neighbors. Everything is perfect, a dream come true.

And Jack is going to keep it that way.

Please Stand By...

Crossover With: WandaVision 

Mutually Assured Uncooperation by  princessoftheworlds (JackIanto, OwenTosh, MarthaMickey, FitzSimmons, LincolnDaisy (past) | complete | 31547 | T)

Aliens, time-travelling, resurrections. These are all experiences familiar to not just one but two top-secret organizations that have a hard time keeping a low-profile. Figures that they would encounter each other eventually.

Or: the five times that SHIELD and Torchwood had an encounter that neither were pleased with, and the one time they had to work together when two of their own were taken.

Or: There's Kree running amok in Cardiff, including a murdered one, and Torchwood is on the case, but so is SHIELD. Also, don't forget the memory-manipulating aliens there too!

Crossover With: Agents of Shield/MCU

all i know is (infatuations) by  princessoftheworlds (JackIanto, JackJohn,  OwenTosh, LisaIanto | complete | 439 | T)

Seventh-year Slytherin Ianto Jones handles a break up, getting a boyfriend, terrible emotional misunderstandings with his best friend Jack Harkness, being miserable, and reconciliation. (Not precisely in that order.)

Crossover With: Harry Potter

[starlight-vixen-emiko]

Lukanette Minific October: Poison

Author’s Note: This is based on another fanfic I wrote.

Writing Marinette and Luka in theater is fun!

So without further ado.

~~~~~~

Having Juleka direct a school play was certainly something.

But it was October, and Juleka said that the school’s production of Snow White should be a horror. And after a moment of thought, Luka and Marinette agreed that would be fitting.

Juleka sat in the front row narrating the play.

“And the handsome prince finds Snow White dead on the ground with a bitten apple next to her,” Juleka said, in her best storyteller voice.

Luka gasped at the sight of his princess lying on the ground. He knelt beside her and placed a gentle hand on her cheek. Marinette couldn’t help but smile lightly at her boyfriend’s touch. Then again, Juleka was in the front row and couldn’t see her break character. Luka smiled as well, knowing she would open her beautiful eyes soon as he moved his lips near hers.

“But little does the prince know that the poison apple turned the princess’s lips blood red! And kissing the princess causes the prince to die as well!” Juleka cried with great enthusiasm.

Luka only pecked Marinette’s lips before he moved away and gasped. He tried his best pretending to hiss and wail in pain before he collapsed next to Marinette.

Juleka clapped her hands. “Perfect!”

Luka and Marinette couldn’t help but laugh a little bit while they lay beside each other.

“Ok, you two can get up now,” Juleka cried.

Luka opened his eyes and saw Marinette opening her bluebell eyes and beamed at him. They got up together and took a moment to sit.

“Well,” Luka took a moment to scratch his perfectly groomed prince hairstyle. “I am never going to see the story of Snow White the same way again.”

Marinette took his hand and smiled at him. “It was fun though.”

Luka chuckled, thinking about how he acted out dying from a poison kiss. “Yes, it was,” he replied.

The couple stood up hand and hand as they walked around the cottage kitchen set.

“Ok you two,” Juleka said. “You’re free to leave now! But be sure to come here bright and early tomorrow!”

Marinette and Luka gently climbed off the stage and took a moment to meet with Juleka.

“Thank you Juleka, I need to make candied ‘poison’ apples anyway,” Marinette said.

Juleka looked up from the script she was reading. “Apples?” She asked as her eyes lit up.

Marinette smiled and nodded. “Yes! And lots of ‘poison’ fruit punch.”

Juleka removed her director’s hat and sorted her papers before getting out of her seat. She ran over to her brother and Marinette.

“Can I come as well?” Juleka asked. “I could use a delicious poison apple.”

Luka smiled and wrapped his free arm around his younger sister. The three of them walked out of the auditorium together for more Halloween fun.

Juleka could talk about the joys of joke poison all night.

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

tagged by @jivewise; thanks!

rules: tag nine people you want to know better.

three ships: Steve/Loki might be my favorite ship; it’s one of very few I’ve actually written for. definitely fond of Loki/Valkyrie. and I guess I do genuinely ship Loki/Sylvie--for various reason I might’ve been happier if the show hadn’t made it explicitly romantic, but it’s a canon queer ship for my boy, and they’re both so cute, and the fanart is great, and also there’s pain, and the anti-Sylki stuff from disgruntled Lokius shippers is, uh...well, I did say their behavior would make me start genuinely shipping Sylki out of sheer spite, and here we are. 

last song: apparently, “You Are The One” by A Place To Bury Strangers, because it’s in my huge playlist of completely random songs I got from completely random places

last movie: uhhhhh. I...don’t know? I mean, the last movie I saw in theaters was Birds of Prey...and the last disc I stuck in my Xbox was the show recording for Cirque du Soleil’s La Nouba, which is not actually a movie (and I was only playing it because I wanted to drown out my asshole neighbors’ noise and we were close enough to our data cap that I didn’t want to stream anything)...I think it might have actually been Haywire, which was months ago, and I only watched it because I’d been vaguely interested when it came out and it was about to leave Tubi or one of the other free streaming sites. no, wait, around the end of July I watched Burrow, a short film on Disney+. and a couple weeks before that I watched Here We Are: Notes for Living on Planet Earth, a different and longer short film on Apple TV+. does that count?   

currently reading: The Night Manager by John Le Carré, because I liked the show a lot (primarily for...reasons that I imagine are obvious) and had some mild fic/headcanon ideas about a specific scene, so I figured I might as well read the version that actually lays out Jonathan’s thoughts about various events to see if I’m totally off base. (verdict: nah, I was dead on about some of it, and I still had a reasonable interpretation for the part that wasn’t explicitly mentioned in the book.) in general it’s, hmm, in that genre of media that I’m pretty sure I’m too stupid to appreciate entirely because apparently I need a lot more things spelled out for me? (if the word “intrigue” shows up anywhere in a plot description, I’m probably lost. or even if it doesn’t but it could.) and of course there are various passages that make me roll my eyes about cis straight dudes, and I’m partial to the show (again for reasons that are probably obvious, but also because we don’t get Jonathan’s internal monologue in the show and sometimes he thinks some shitty straight-dude things about women), but it’s still interesting, and there’s the occasional passage that makes me sit up and go “well okay, dude can write, damn.”

currently watching: nothing, I guess. I’ve been meaning to rewatch the whole Loki show now that it’s all out, and I still need to watch the behind-the-scenes episode for it, plus several other things on Disney+ (WandaVision, TFatWS, The Mandalorian, What If I guess, behind-the-scenes stuff about Disneyland/WDW that my dad mentioned yesterday, probably other things I’m forgetting), but I don’t have Disney+ right now and I don’t want to use the 30-day code I have until I think I’ll make better use of it than I did the two months I bought. which is impossible to know because I’m just...very bad at TV, somehow. I was watching Earth At Night In Color, See, and Ted Lasso with the last few days of the free year-and-a-half Apple TV+ subscription I ended up mostly wasting...and that’s definitely not “current” because it was over a month ago. uh, I’ve also had an anon message in my askbox for a week or so recommending Crash Course Mythology’s videos on tricksters, so that’s something else I’ve been meaning to watch.

currently consuming: just ate some lasagna 

currently craving: if you mean a food item, 95% of the time when I’m craving something, my brain and body very helpfully refuse to tell me what it is, and the other 5% of the time it’s something that isn’t available to me. for non-food, I don’t know, I’m always craving more Loki merch.

gonna tag, um... @ladylowkeyed @taaroko @bedlamsbard @simuran @aurorawest @swinging-stars-from-satellites @adreamer67​ @iamanartichoke @scintillatingshortgirl19 but only if you feel like it, of course. and/or anybody else who sees this and wants to do it should consider themselves tagged

[woulddieforsamwilson]

Paper Rings

It wasn’t like he didn’t know who James Barnes was, he just had no reason to become friends with the boy. He didn’t think they’d be very good friends anyway; James was always with the stronger kids, the ones that would beat Steve up at the end of the day, and that’s where he belonged. James was strong and sturdy, both reasons that half the girls in their class swooned over the boy. But despite all this, James never picked on Steve for being as thin as a stick or beat him up for fun. And Steve swears that one time, during art class when Steve was being praised for his work, James smiled at him.

It was probably nothing.

It wasn’t nothing.

The moon is high

Like your friends were the night that we first met

Went home and tried to stalk you on the internet

Now I've read all of the books beside your bed

Steve didn’t know what happened, one second he was walking home so he could clean before his ma got home, the next he was pulled into a familiar ‘ally.

“Hey there Rogers” Robert, a boy a few years older than Steve who looked 10 years older, “how’s old dad?” Steve glared and squared his shoulders, Robert laughed, “‘think if I were married to your ma with you as a kid, I would want to die too” Steve growled and clenched his fists, ready to hit the boy in front of him, but before he could try, James-fucking-Barnes strolled into the ally.

James was smiling brightly like the best thing in the world just happened to him, which, from what Steve could tell, was probably true, “hey Rob what-” James’ face fell as he saw the scene before him, “what are you doing?” Robert turned and looked at James, “just talking to Rogers. I think we’re gonna be best friends!” Robert and his goons laughed loudly, but James didn’t.

“Right well… why don’t we go get some pie down at Anne’s, hear she’s got a new apple pie out” Robert smiled, “sure James, but first, wanna ‘talk’ too little Stevie here?” 

“No, now can we go?” Robert rolled his eyes, “fine, let me just finish up our chat, then we can go,” Robert kicked Steve in the leg, sending him toppling to the ground, Steve groaned as his head hit the trash can behind him, but he always got up. 

Steve opened his eyes and pushed himself into a crouching position and looked up just in time to see James punch Robert in the face.

“What the hell!” Robert yelled as blood poured from his nose, “pick on someone your own size!” James yelled, crossing his arms and standing protectively in front of Steve, “you’re crazy Barnes!” Robert said, turning away and running back to whatever hellhole he came from, his goons followed.

When they were all gone, James turned to look at Steve, his gaze was piercing and comforting, like the look, his Ma gave him when he came home with bruises. “Are you okay?” Steve glared and pushed himself fully up, “I’m fine,” James looked instantly relieved, but Steve continued, “but you don’t have to stand up for me, I can take care of my self” James scrunched his eyebrows like this was the most ridiculous thing he had ever heard, “you call getting your ass kicked ‘taking care of it’?” Steve rolled his eyes, “yes, because if you would’ve given me a few more minutes I would’ve had them right where I wanted them” James laughed-and for a moment Steve’s heart stopped-but then it was over and he was talking, “right, see ya later Stevie” Steve sputtered in protest, because the only person who could call him Stevie was his Ma, but James was already gone, possibly taking Steves heart with him.

That night Steve made it his life goal to become friends with James Barnes.

The wine is cold

Like the shoulder that I gave you in the street

Cat and mouse for a month or two or three

Now I wake up in the night and watch you breathe

Bucky was an idiot. He’d been working up the courage to talk to Steve Rogers since he first saw him, but he could never muster the strength. But of course, his stupid brain chooses to introduce himself to Steve at the worst possible time.

And now, he lost half his friends.

Was it worth it? Probably. His ‘friends’ shouldn’t have picked on Steve. Steve who weighed less than his book bag, who was always sick and bruised, who only had a mom, Steve who was perfect in every way.

The next day, a Saturday, Robert and his goons showed up at his door. “Barnes. Can we talk” Bucky nodded and stepped out of his house, closing the door behind him slightly. 

“Is this about yesterday? Cause if you think I’m gonna apologize-” Robert rolled his eyes “yeah we figured you wouldn’t apologize. But we still want to be friends” Bucky smiled, these guys weren’t as bad as he thought, “but we don’t want you to talk to Rogers anymore” Bucky’s smiled faltered, he didn’t want to stop talking to Steve after he just got up the nerve to speak to him, but he also didn’t want to lose all his friends in one swoop. He could go back to just admiring from afar, like before, “alright, but only if you stop picking on other kids, especially Steve” Robert nodded and held out his hand, ignoring the rock at the bottom of his stomach, Bucky took Roberts hand and they shook. 

Bucky was the worst person ever. After he defended Steve, the younger boy had tried to approach him several times, always nervous-and as time went on-expecting the worst. Bucky wanted to be friends with Steve, but Robert was somehow always around, and so Bucky always shut poor Steve down. 

Eventually, Steve stopped asking. 

Bucky was walking home again, he could already smell the dinner his Mama was making back home, and his stomach growled in anticipation. “Wow your little crush on Barnes must be huge, no other reason you would keep talking to him even when you know what we’re gonna do to you” Bucky stopped dead in his tracks, Robert had promised, he wasn’t going to hurt Steve-or anyone else, but baby steps-Robert may be many things but a promise-breaker wasn’t- ”I can do this all day!” He heard Steve’s voice call out, surprisingly confident considering his situation.

“Hey!” Bucky yelled, stepping into the now-familiar ally behind the movie theater, “thought we promised?” Robert sighed, clearly exasperated, “c’mon James, have you not seen how this fairy has acted around you? He’s in love with you! Wouldn’t you beat him up if he was in love with us?” Bucky glared, “no” and then he punched Robert for the second time.

It was the start of a beautiful friendship.

Kiss me once 'cause I know you had a long night

(Oh!) Kiss you twice 'cause it's gonna be alright

Three times 'cause you waited your whole life

(One, two, one two three four!)

Years later they had graduated high school. Bucky was working at the docs and Steve was taking art classes. 

One night Bucky came home completely exhausted. He sloppily untied his shoes and undid his shirt buttons. Once he was done he wobbly walked over to the couch where Steve was sitting, a drawing pad on his lap and a pencil in hand. 

Steve looked up at Bucky’s disheveled self and blushed, but didn’t comment. Bucky flopped down on the old couch and sighed at the comfort that enveloped him. 

“Buck?” Bucky hummed, acknowledging he heard Steve but not opening his eyes, “could I kiss you?” Bucky’s eyes shot open, staring up into Steve’s own eyes, which were full of fear, before his mind could even process what his body was doing, he was nodding excitedly. 

And then, for the briefest of seconds, Steve’s lips were on Buckys, and then they were gone. 

But Bucky wasn’t done. He sat up quickly and looked at Steve, “Steve?” the younger boy nodded, “could I kiss you?” he nodded again, and that night was filled with small kisses and happy feelings. 

I like shiny things, but I’d marry you with paper rings

Uh-huh, that’s right

Darling, you’re the one I want and

I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this

Uh-huh, that’s right

Darling, you’re the one I want and

Paper rings and picture frames and dirty dreams

Oh, you’re the one I want

“Marry me?”

It was a question both had thought about before, but neither brought up, too afraid to scare the other. 

But on a particularly rainy afternoon, it was blurted in the middle of the kitchen.

“What?” Steve asked half in shock. 

“Marry me” Bucky stared at Steve, love, and devotion clear in his eyes. 

“We-I” Steve took a second to control his thoughts, “we can’t get rings,” he said simply. “Steven Grant Rogers I would marry you with paper rings,” Steve’s heart melted, but quickly broke when he thought of all the terrible things getting married would do.

“Steve? It’s okay love we don’t have to I was just thinking…” Steve looked up at Bucky with tears in his eyes, “I can’t do that to you! You have your entire life ahead of you, I could die any second! You deserve someone better, someone, who could take care of you and love you till you grow old! I can’t do that Buck!” Steve cried out, all his insecurities leaking out.

It was silent for a full minute before Bucky stood up and walked toward Steve, for a second he thought Bucky would slap him, but instead, Bucky grabbed his face and kissed him harshly.

“Stevie, you’re the one I want. No one else, just you” Steve looked at Bucky’s face and knew it was true, “yes.”

Bucky froze, “what?” Steve took a deep breath, “yes, I’ll marry you” Bucky’s face broke out into a beautiful grin as he laughed, Bucky picked Steve up and spun him around, making the blond laugh giddily. 

A day later, in their small apartment, they were married.

I want to drive away with you

I want your complications too

I want your dreary Mondays

Wrap your arms around me, baby boy

The Grand Canyon was going to be their honeymoon. They had been saving up all year to go anyway, but since their wedding, they had decided to make it an unofficial honeymoon. 

A week before they were going to leave, Bucky received a letter telling him he was drafted.

[teenwolffanclub-me]

Haunted House

(Stiles Stilinski x Reader)

Request: What about a haunted house with Stiles?? I love the adrenaline rush but also I think it would be hilarious for someone who deals with literal supernatural creatures to go to a haunted house 😂

Word count: 1,315

Warnings: none, just haunted house shenanigans

Notes: I added Scott bc I couldn’t help myself, hopefully that’s okay! Also, send me more fall themed requests bc I’m obsessed!!

———————————————————————

A high pitched scream echoed through the small hallway, making you recoil back in fear.

A broad-shouldered figure rammed into your front as they tried scurrying away from whatever had startled them. The boy turned to face you, his chocolate eyes wide with panic.

“What? What was it?” A shaky voice rushed out from behind you.

“I don’t know. I thought I saw something.” The boy’s eyebrows rose sheepishly as he shrugged.

You slapped a hand against his chest for scaring you unnecessarily. “Scott, get it together. You’re literally a fucking werewolf!”

He frowned at you, offended by your accusatory tone. This haunted house was scary as shit already, and the three of you had barely gotten ten feet inside. Werewolf or not, this was not his idea of fun.

As if on cue, an angry voice shouted urgently from the entrance. “Get a move on! We have a line out here!”

“You heard her.” You swept your arm forward, gesturing for him to finish leading the way.

He scoffed, already feeling terrified enough for one night. “No way.”

You swiveled around to look at the boy behind you, catching a glimpse of his wide-eyed expression before he forced it into a more neutral one. He squared his shoulders and cleared his throat, glancing between his two partners-in-crime quickly.

“Fine. Sure. I-I’m not even scared, so...” He brushed past both you and Scott, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes in disbelief.

“Okay, Stiles.” If you knew one thing about him, it was that he liked to pretend he was fearless.

Realistically, you all knew this was fake. This wasn’t even one of those haunted houses that required a waiver or anything. It was literally put on by the high school’s theater department.

Plus, you’d already been through enough real terrors to supply a lifetime of nightmares. Jackson turning into a murderous kanima, Allison’s psychotic grandpa, a pack of alphas, and an ancient nogitsune to name a few. But there was just something about teenagers covered in fake blood jumping out of the dark that never failed to get your heart pumping.

Stiles took a few tentative steps forward and you looked at Scott expectantly when he didn’t move. The two of you fought silently for a few seconds, both jerking your arms in his direction, insisting the other go first. After a few long moments you finally relented with a scowl, rushing to catch up.

You crowded up close to Stiles’ back and grabbed one of his hands for comfort. You weren’t going to admit it to either of them, but you were actually pretty scared. Stiles spazzed wildly at the unexpected contact, whipping around to face you with wide eyes.

“Holy fuckin’ shit! Don’t do that!” He whispered harshly, his heart racing in his chest. He literally thought he was dying for a second there.

You looked at him incredulously and quietly yelled right back. “Are you kidding me right now? I thought you weren’t scared.”

His honey eyes twitched at your mocking tone before he begrudgingly turned back around. You walked forward slowly, hand in hand, for only a second before a room to your right illuminated to show a man dressed as a farmer. He was using a chainsaw to cut someone, who was suspended up like a scarecrow, in half.

It was a combination of the jarring volume of the saw, the guy’s maniacal laughter, and his victims screams that had you bolting up the narrow hall.

You put a hand on your chest as you tried catching your breath. Stiles hunched over, resting his hands on his knees for support as his chest heaved. You’d think he just tried to run a mile with the way he was gasping for air.

“Remember when I said that we should always listen to everything I say and never question any of my ideas ever?” Stiles huffed, looking up at you with a harsh glare.

You just smiled sheepishly. “I thought it would be fun...”

Fall had just started, after all. Beacon Hills tended to get freezing way too soon, and you wanted to soak up the autumn festivities while you could. Lydia and Kira had outright refused to come, despite your various attempts at bribery.

The boys were the only ones that usually humored you, anyway, so nothing was new there. Stiles turned back around and you continued down the path slowly, jumping at every single small noise or masked person who jumped out.

You were just beginning to think that you’d gone a suspicious amount of time without anything happening, when suddenly a person dressed in a terrible Freddy Krueger costume popped out of nowhere. Seriously, it looked like someone’s school project or something.

You screamed, more startled than actually scared. Stiles’ hands wrapped around your biceps and he shoved you in front of him, using you as a human shield. That plan only lasted a split second before he thought better of it and moved you behind him instead.

The guy’s yelling was all jumbled up beneath his mask, but he was determined to get a good scare out of you. When he slashed what you hoped was a fake knife at you, Stiles lunged forward and punched him right in the face.

Your jaw dropped in shock as the poor kid crumpled to the floor, moaning in pain. Stiles’ eyes widened in horror beside you. He was honestly more surprised than you that he’d just done that, but it was just his knee-jerk reaction to the sight of someone trying to hurt you.

He grabbed your hand tightly and speed-walked down the hall, ready to get the hell out of there. You happily let him drag you along, not wanting to be there anymore than he did. It was only after a few seconds that you realized you no longer felt Scott’s presence at your back.

“Wait!” You breathed, stumbling to a halt. You spun around only to confirm that he actually wasn’t there. “Where’s Scott?”

“Oh, Jesus. Are you kidding me with this? How did he get lost? There’s literally only one way you can go.” Stiles was more annoyed at the delay than anything. He just wanted to get this over with and drink some overpriced apple cider in the safety of the pumpkin patch outside.

“We have to go back.” You took a step in the direction you’d just come from, but had no choice but to stop as Stiles tightened his hold on you.

“Absolutely not.” He shook his head quickly and tugged you closer to his side. “He’s probably already dead, you know? He would want us to make it out of here. So we should really just—”

At that moment, someone popped out from behind a black curtain you hadn’t even noticed. Stiles spazzed beside you with a shout, dropping your hand to flail his arms upward before bolting down the hallway.

You stared at his retreating figure, jaw dropping at the way he’d just left you so easily. You glared at the masked stranger before stomping your way toward the exit, completely over this whole thing. Only a few moments later, you emerged from the haunted house, your narrowed eyes landing on Stiles as he bent over and clutched at his chest.

You were about to lay into him for abandoning you, when you caught sight of Scott sitting on a bail of hay a few feet away. He had the nerve to smirk at you in amusement, a cup of apple cider in one hand and a pretzel in the other. “Took you guys long enough.”

“We are never...” Stiles gasped for breath and raised an accusatory finger your way. “Ever doing anything like that again.”

You just rolled your eyes, knowing full well you’d force them into doing this again next year, and they would let you.