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feelbokkie · 15 days

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L♡VE IN F♡CUS | Chapter 4

PAIRING: idol!Changbin x fem reader

WARNINGS: mention of food/eating, one swear word, some angst

GENRE: smau, crack, angst, fluff

P♡V: 1st/2nd person (depending on how you view it)

SUMMARY: Amateur concert photographer Y/n has recently been promoted to junior music journalist. Her first assignment? An exposé on the popular Kpop boy group, Stray Kids. Spending an entire tour doing in depth interviews with eight men seems simple enough, but one member isn't exactly open to the idea. Will Y/n be able to break down the walls around his heart, or will her big break turn into a big disaster?

TAGLIST: closed

W♡RD C♡UNT: 4,981

SCREENSH♡T C♡UNT: 15

A/N: sorry for disappearing without a word

PREVIOUS | MASTERLIST | NEXT

“So, how does all this work?” You ask from the couch behind the set of chairs Chan and Changbin are currently sitting in, a third one is empty between the two of them.

“Like producing or all of the buttons?” Chan asks, spinning around in the chair to give you all of his attention.

“You can explain the buttons if you want,” You adjust yourself comfortably on the couch, making sure to find a way to sit so you can take notes without hurting your back later. “But I meant producing.”

The three of you are currently sitting in a recording studio that the company rented for the group to use on their last day in Sydney. One of the inclusions that everyone agreed on is a mini CD-R of each member's solo song from the tour, and one rerecorded song for the group version broken up into a special racha version. The boys wanted to get the recording as quickly as they could before they got too tired from touring, which is why you're up at the earliest time you've needed to be so far.

Chan starts to roll up the sleeve of his black hoodie, thinking for a moment. "Well, when Han gets here--"

"If Han gets here. I guarantee you that he's still asleep right now." Changbin whines, his voice still heavy from sleep.

"I'll send a text to the group chat in a second to have one of the other kids swing by his room before they come over." Chan rubs his eyes as he pulls his phone out of his pocket and sets it on the table behind him. "We can do the first two songs without him right now I guess."

"They're just the solo songs so we can manage." Changbin yawns. You can't tell if he's telling you or reassuring Chan.

"Yeah, you're right. Anyway," He pulls off his cham and fixes his hair before placing it back on. "Someone will be in the recording booth with headphones that play the backing track while everyone else can hear from the speakers in here. Basically, everyone out here is listening to make sure that the recording goes well. That whoever is in the booth is keeping pitch, or pronouncing everything correctly, and so forth. Or if something doesn't sound right, we can fix it right then and there. It's not always in one go though so sometimes we have to take the best bits of each take and splice them together."

"And then you take the mostly recorded track and do whatever tweaking needs to be done in post?" You question as you write down what Chan explained.

"Exactly! Someone's been doing their homework." Chan claps once loudly in excitement, the sudden noise causes Changbin to jump in his seat.

"I've always been a good student." You smirk to yourself as you look through your questions to ask. "I've watched some of your recording sessions on YouTube. You--"

The door swings open, stealing all of your attention. On the other side, Jisung stands holding four coffees in a carrier in one hand and another, larger iced coffee in the other. He's mostly hidden away in a large beanie that falls just above his eyes, a matching black face mask, an oversized hoodie, and baggy grey cargo pants.

"I know I'm late, but I bought an apology gift." He says, holding up the drink carrier.

"More like a bribe." Chan laughs, turning the seat next to around so that Jisung can sit in it.

"Here you go, noona." Jisung hands you one of the iced coffees before taking his seat between Chan and Changbin.

"I can be bought." You joke as you take the drink.

You watch as Jisung settles into his seat, handing both Chan and Changbin their drinks before placing the remaining fifth cup on the table behind them. Chan takes a sip of the coffee and turns back to you. "Noona, you were asking us a question."

"I'll ask it later. You guys have a lot of work ahead of you. I'll be like a fly on the wall from this moment forward."

All three of them nod in agreement. Recoding nine songs in one day isn't impossible but it is a lot of work. The three of them turn around again and discuss something briefly that you can't hear. Unsure of what else to do, you recheck your notes as they talk, trying your best to give them privacy in the too-small room.

"Ah, I'm suddenly nervous to record this song!" Chan laughs nervously while throwing his head back.

"We've all seen you perform it seven times already." Jisung pats him on the back to reassure him.

"Yeah but..." His voice trails off as he slowly makes eye contact with you as he spins around.

"You're nervous because of me?" You point to yourself for confirmation.

"Well, the song is a bit..." His voice trails off again, scratching the back of his increasingly red neck.

"Oh, so you can take your shirt off in front of Stay but you can't sing the song in front of noona?" Changbin teases.

"At this point, noona is like my sister. So it's..."

"I'm pretty sure your actual sister was in the audience this weekend. Your entire family really." You remind him.

"Oh my God," He sighs, burying his head in his hands.

"Ah, Bang Chan! Just hurry up and go in the booth already!" Changbin yells, getting annoyed and dropping all formalities with his leader.

"Okay, okay!" He gets up and takes one more sip of his coffee. "It's a song about trains anyway so I don't know what I'm getting worked up about."

"Hyung, be so fucking for real right now. We're all adults here. Just--"

Smack!

"Ow! What was that for." Jisung rubs the spot on his thigh that Changbin just smacked.

Changbin doesn't say anything. Instead, he nods in your direction, warning the younger man that you're still listening. You roll your eyes and raise your hand up. "It's off the record, don't worry."

After some punches to the air, Chan finally makes his way into the recording booth. He places the large headphones over his ears and pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket. He unfolds the paper and then places it on the music stand in front of him. He signals for you to turn around and cover your ears with a sheepish smile. You respond by shaking your head 'no' and snapping a quick picture of him with your camera.

Jisung gets up from his seat and takes the seat that Chan was sitting in earlier. He pats his previous seat with his hand while looking through the papers in front of him. "Noona, sit here. Come be an honorary member of 3racha."

"I promise you that your careers are safer if I sit back here." You chuckle slightly.

"Then come up here and keep us company. It feels weird sitting here with just two of us. Feels like if Cerberus was missing a head."

"That's a bit dramatic, no?" You question as you gather your things.

"It's 3racha. You need all three of us. Cerberus is just a two-headed dog without the third head. Or worse, a regular dog. 2racha isn't a real thing." Jisung says with a faraway look in his eyes. You can almost see a glint of fondness as he thinks back about something.

"Can I quote you on that?" You ask as you set your things on the table.

"Technically Vocalracha is 2racha," Changbin interjects. Without looking up from the papers he's now flipping through, he pulls out Jisung's chair for you to sit on. Without hesitation, you quietly thank him while taking the seat.

"That's not the same thing and you know it hyung." Jisung whines, stomping his feet on the floor, gently shaking the table.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

All three of your heads snap up at Chan who is now mouthing something at you.

"Oh, his mic is off," Changbin says while he looks at the set of buttons spread out across the table.

"Hold on, this system is different from the one we're used to. Everything is in English too."

"They showed us how to use the equipment earlier but I forgot which one is the mic on and off button," Changbin explains.

Your eyes scan the table and find the button labeled 'microphone on/off'. Afraid of accidentally hitting something and messing with the entire system, you quietly point to it. Changbin follows your finger and presses the button without any hesitation. You hold your breath for a moment, scared that you might have found the wrong button. All three of you stare at Chan while Jisung signals for him to talk.

"Is my mic on now?" Chan asks softly.

All three of you let out a sigh of relief before Jisung presses the intercom button in front of him and leans into the mic. "Yeah, hyung. We can hear you now, loud and clear."

"Okay, good. Are we good to start now? I want to get my song over with before the other kids get here." Chan teeters back and forth on his feet and swings his arms back and forth like a child waiting for their parent to get done talking to their friend. It's an insane image of a man who is about to sing a song that is definitely not about railways.

Jisung turns to look at Changbin who is looking at a little piece of paper in front of him. You can see small diagrams of buttons and little notes on them in Korean that you're almost certain he wrote himself. He gives Jisung a thumbs-up as his finger hovers over one of the buttons.

"Yeah, we're going to start now, hyung," Jisung tells him before sliding the intercom away from him.

Chan resumes his position in front of the microphone. He flashes all three of you an innocent smile before signaling that he's ready to start. Both you and Jisung watch Changbin as he presses one of the buttons. Soon after, the opening notes of "Railway" play over the speaker in the room. Chan makes a motion pointing up which causes Changbin to scramble as he looks for another button while referring to his little cheat sheet. Changbin presses the button and Chan gives him another thumbs-up before singing the opening lines of the song.

You sit quietly between the two younger members of 3racha as they work, careful to not distract them. You've been with them for two months, but this is the most serious you've seen them. Most of the time, they're goofing off and picking on each other or the other members. Changbin quietly nods along to the music while reading the lyrics sitting in front of him. Every few seconds he writes a little note on the page. Jisung is also reading along with the lyrics. After Chan finishes the first verse, he waits patiently while drinking water as Jisung and Changbin quietly discuss among themselves what parts they should have him fix. After a few minutes, they go over what went well and what he can do to improve. Chan nods along before the three of them rerecord the first verse. After the second recording, they replay both versions of the recording for Chan to hear. This time Chan seems a bit dissatisfied and asks if he can try one more time. Once more, the opening notes play and Chan redoes the first verse. During the review of the third take, all three of them are satisfied and go to the next verse.

This process continues for each verse, chorus, and adlib until all three of them, but most importantly Chan, are happy with the final product. Afterwards, Chan switches places with Jisung and it starts all over again. Jisung's recording goes a bit faster than Chan's due to fewer notes from the other two producers in the room. While Jisung records, both Chan and Changbin are quietly explaining everything to you so you have a bit more context of what's going on. After Jisung is done, he takes Chan's seat again while Chan moves over to Changbin's seat so they can record the next song. Changbin's recording took the longest of the three because of how much he was joking around. After that, they managed to get started on the 3racha hip-hop version of "Runners," all while spending more time messing around than focusing. Still, the three of them are done in nearly two hours.

For a moment, you're left alone in the recording studio while the three men take their break outside of the room. You sit quietly on the couch, your new permanent spot now that all three producers are done recording, and add to your notes about the experience. You don't notice at first that Changbin is the first one back in the room. He's quiet for a moment as he reclaims his spot at the end of the table.

"It's not as fun and glamorous as our recording session videos, huh?" Changbin asks quietly, finally breaking his silence.

You slowly lift your head up and blink at him, confused for a moment. You don't think there's been a moment where he's spoken to you first before. At least, not unprompted. Not without another member being in the room.

Changbin continues to stare at you, waiting for your answer. You shake your head and put your notebook aside, "No, I think it's very interesting. I'm learning a lot about making music and you three in general. I really love music so seeing how it's made is really fun."

Changbin slowly nods his head as he spins back around. You roll your eyes as you pick up your notebook again. A few seconds later, Changbin turns around again. You freeze midsentence, waiting for him to say something.

"Do you want to experience the other side of it?" His expression is soft and genuine. You've only seen this expression on his face when he's with his members, never with you. Then again, you haven't been alone with him yet. Maybe the overprotective, intimidating part of him is an act.

"What?" You set your notebook aside once again, "Like, inside the recording booth?"

"Yeah," While his face is softer towards you than you're used to seeing, he still refuses to smile. "For your article. You're still writing that, right? In addition to everything else?"

"I am still writing the article. And I'd love to step inside the booth." Notebook in hand, you follow as Changbin stands up and leads you to the door you've watched all three of them go through.

You wait patiently as you watch Changbin adjust the height of the mic for you. After a few moments, he quietly leaves the room and takes his spot back in front of the soundboard. He motions for you to put the headphones on.

The recording booth is smaller on the inside than you imagined. Much more stuffy, hotter than the room you were just in. It must have something to do with all the soundproofing that needs to be done. You roll up the sleeves of your sweater while you look around the room, taking in every little detail.

"Noona, can you hear me?" Changbin's voice rings through the headphones.

"Yeah," You turn, giving your full attention to the man on the other end of the glass. You always thought that there was a speaker overhead that was connected to the intercom in the other room.

"Good," He nods as he takes a sip of his now watered-down coffee. "I'm going to play something so you can hear what it's like."

You give him a thumbs up as you watch him search through Chan's laptop. After a moment, finding what he's looking for, he turns to look back up at you. "So you're going to hear a quick-timing beat and then the music is going to start."

You wait while watching Changbin as three ticks of what sounds like a metronome play in your ear right before the instrumental track for "Runners" starts. Your head bobs along to the music as you mentally sing the lyrics of the song you've heard countless times. The music is so loud, you're almost certain your heartbeat changed to match the tempo.

Just as soon as the song starts, it ends right when the first verse should end. You quickly grab your notebook and jot down a few notes before looking back at Changbin again.

"Is it always like this? Like," You pause for a moment, trying to find the right words. "is it always just the backing track? I've heard that some artist hear their own voice too."

"You can hear your own voice if you want it that way but it can get a bit confusing so we don't. Some artists will have their guide playing if they have one or a metronome to keep the tempo. If we're layering or doing adlibs then we'll have what we've already recorded playing instead to make it easier for us and the person mixing the track."

"I see," A million more questions float into your mind as you take note of what Changbin just told you. But you decide to keep them to yourself for now. You still have a few more hours before the day is over.

"Do you want to record for real?" Changbin asks suddenly.

You pause for a moment, contemplating his question. It would be a bucket list item you would be able to scratch off the list. But the idea of performing a--song let alone performing a song in front of the original artist--is intimidating. "I can't sing,"

"We have autotune," He says as the corner of his mouth twitches up into a smirk that he can't hide.

You bite your lower lip as you think about the next time an opportunity like this will happen again. With your career, it probably won't happen again in this lifetime.

"Okay, but no laughing."

"Well, not in front of you."

"I changed my mind." You go to pull the headphones off and go back into the main room.

"I'm kidding, I'll be nice. I promise." He says quickly, his infectious laughter ringing through your ears. "What song do you want to do?"

"'Runners' is fine." You breathe as you readjust the headphones on your head.

Changbin does something on the laptop for a moment, probably turning on the autotune for you, and then makes an 'okay' symbol letting you know he's ready to go.

You say a silent prayer that you don't completely embarrass yourself in front of Changbin or any of the other members who are bound to walk back into the studio at any moment as the metronome chimes in your ears again. As the song starts, your voice is a bit shakier than you hoped. It's one thing to pretend to be an idol recording a song in the shower. It's an entirely different beast standing in a real recording booth while singing in front of an actual idol.

The song goes on longer than it did when Changbin was showing you how it sounded earlier. He's probably letting you go for as long as you can before cutting you off. Unfortunately for him, and his ears, you know the entire song.

Claps erupt in your ears just as the song finishes. You turn to the side to see that Chan and Jisung have returned from their break and that both Seungmin and Jeongin have also arrived. You quickly rip off your headphones, grab your notebook, and leave the booth with your eyes on the floor so that none of the boys can see how red your face is. You're not sure when any of them came in, and for your sake, it might be better that you didn't know.

"Wow, noona, do you want to join us in Vocalracha?" Jeongin jokes as you take your spot back on the couch.

"I think Vocalracha has enough members, thank you very much."

"Just switch places with Seungmin, nobody will notice the difference," Jisung suggests as he takes his seat next to Changbin.

"I'll notice," Seungmin deadpans as he takes the spot next to you on the couch.

"Does that mean I'll be Vocalracha leader then?" Jeongin's eyes light up with a mischievous twinkle.

"I think for noona's sake, you shouldn't be the leader. You'll run it like the military." Chan laughs, ruffling Jeongin's hair. In return, Jeongin pushes him hard enough to cause him to stumble.

Jeonging climbs over both your and Seungmin’s legs to get to the empty seat near the couch in the corner. "And Seungmin hyung doesn't?"

"I'm nice to you, why are you lying? Spend a day in danceracha with Lee Know hyung and you'll be crawling back to me, begging for forgiveness." Seungmin pouts.

Jeongin him off while pulling his phone out of his pocket. "I bow for no one,"

"You bow for Stay." Chan reminded the youngest man.

"That's different. I respect Stay." He replies without missing a beat.

"You don't respect me?" Seungmin asks, his mouth drops open, feigning shock.

Jeongin turns to Seungmin and points at himself. "Maknae on top,"

"Guys," Changbin warns. Both Seungmin and Jeongin turn to the older man, confused by the sudden warning. Changbin only replies by nodding in your direction.

And just like that, he's back to putting a wall between you and the entire group.

"Noona knows that we're only joking," Seungmin says softly, turning back to you with soft eyes. Almost like he's apologizing on Changbin's behalf. "Don't you, Y/n noona?"

"I vaguely remember one or more of you saying something about how Jeongin would be scary if he was one of the hyungs so..." You tease as you pretend to flip through your notebook. You slightly glance up and make eye contact with a worried Changbin. "I'm only joking, I know Jeongin has a soft spot for each of you and to take what you guys say with a grain of salt. Like when Seungmin says he hates you, he doesn't really--"

Seungmin throws his hand in front of your mouth, not close enough to touch you, but enough to get you to stop talking. "Hey, hey, hey, no need to expose me like that, noona."

"Okay, okay, well leave the two maknaes alone." Chan laughs, as he takes his seat next to Jisung. "Which one of you wants to go first? Or did you want to start by doing Vocalracha's 'Runners,' drama version?"

"I'll go first. Someone spent the whole car ride worried about doing his sexy concept in front of noona." Seungmin sighs as he gets up and walks straight into the booth.

"Hey," Jeongin cries, looking up from his phone.

"I'd like to remind everyone that I've already seen all of your stages. Multiple times. I've already seen the belly buttons and abs and heard all of the lyrics enough times in the past two months for you to not be worried." You reassure him.

"Couldn't be me," Chan clears his throat as he turns back around. You can see how quickly his neck and ears are getting red just before he pulls his hood over his head.

"You are the biggest offender, don't lie." Jisung laughs while hitting Chan on the shoulder.

"Seungmin, are you ready?" Chan changes the subject as Seungmin pulls his headphones on. Seungmin responds by making a silly face and doing a thumbs-up.

***

The rest of the day pretty much goes how it did earlier. Seungmin got done with his recording almost as quickly, if not faster than Jisung did earlier. Jeongin took a bit longer because he nitpicked each of his takes to make sure they were perfect. By the time they were done with their solos and recording "Runners," drama version it was time for lunch and the remaining three members of the group came with food for everyone. After lunch, Danceracha got started with their version of "Runners" before doing their solo recordings.

You tried to focus as well as you could but with the room full, there was always something happening on the side that always caught your attention. The other members only got scolded by Chan, Changbin, and Jisung, who were in full producer mode, a handful of times for their volume or overall playful antics. And while the day didn't feel like it lasted that long, when you checked your phone, it was basically dinner time.

"Alright, Lee Know-ssi, you're all done." Chan yawns into the microphone. You are almost certain he didn't get much sleep last night after the two of you spent the entire day exploring Sydney for his solo zine.

"Thank god!" The second oldest yells as he quickly pulls off his headphones and joins all eight of you in the main room.

With nowhere left to sit, Minho sits on Changbin's feet. Nobody else is phased by it, and after spending time with the group, it doesn't puzzle you as much as it once did.

"Hyung, get off," Changbin whines.

Minho tilts his head back and looks at Changbin innocently. "Why?"

"Never mind," Changbin mumbles as he gently pushes Minho's head back forward.

You do your best to hide the smirk threatening you appear on your face as you pack up your equipment. You didn't use much today, just your camera and your notebook. But still, you make sure to disconnect the lens from the camera and over both of them with the appropriate caps and then slide them into your bag. You close your notebook with a satisfying tap and put the pen into the wire spiral before putting it into your bag. Satisfied that you packed everything, you stand up and sling your bag over your shoulder.

"If none of you have any plans, we can all head out to dinner for our last night in Australia?" You ask softly.

You want to treat the boys after a long day of work that you know they wouldn't have had if it wasn't for you. It's the least you can do. That is if you can find a way to pay without them knowing or trying to beat you to it.

"A little bit later? There's something the kids and I have to talk about first. If you don't mind waiting, it'll take about an hour. You can go ahead and wait at the hotel if you want." Chan says while stretching his arms in front of him.

You nod with a smile. "That's fine. We can also go another day too. No rush. Have during your meeting. Or text me if you still want to go."

Trying not to trip, you slightly knock into Felix's leg as you leave. You give them one final wave goodbye just as you leave.

You walk to the entrance of the studio, passing by a few random people entering the building. Deciding to stay cool, you wait in the lobby and dig around your bag, looking for your phone so you can call a car service to bring you back to the hotel.

Panic slowly sets in when you don't feel your phone in your bag. You check your pockets quickly before emptying your bag on the couch in the lobby. Pens, gum, your headphones, camera, notebook, wallet, and a bit of trash fall out. But not your phone. You think for a moment, you could have sworn that you put your phone in your bag. You checked the time, set it on the arm of the couch, and then...

It's still in the studio. You shove everything back in your bag. No longer panicking, you move slowly. You could wait around for the group to be done with their meeting and grab your phone so you don't disrupt them. But waiting for an hour, with nothing more to do feels a bit daunting. You could try to head back to the hotel and see if you could ask one of the staff members to message one of the members to grab your phone but the key to your room is in the back of your phone case. And with the security precautions in place for the group, you're almost certain you're not going to be able to get a spare key from the front desk.

"Here," Someone mutters furiously under their breath.

You turn around quickly, only to be met face to face with Changbin, his other hand clenched tightly in a fist. Even with his jaw clenched, you can see spasms of irritation across his face.

"T-thank you," You stutter as you take your phone from him.

Without saying a word, he turns back around and starts walking back to the studio. Halfway he stops, turns back around, and walks back towards you quickly.

"If you're going to bug us, you should learn to hide your phone better." He growls in a low voice.

"Excuse me?" You scoff in disbelief at the accusation.

You thought that you had Changbin figured out. That he's lovely in general but he's protective of the group. But now, as he stares at you with his nostrils flared and pure anger in his eyes, you fear that everything about him is an act.

Before you can explain yourself or even try to diffuse the tension between the two of you, Changbin disappears back into the hallway again.

You tightly grip your phone as you hold back your screams of frustration. You take a few deep breaths to calm yourself down, ignoring the needle pricks of anger stabbing the back of your eyes. Once you've calmed down enough, you pull up the car service app on your phone and order a ride back to the hotel.

—

Buy me a coffee?

—

TAG LIST (closed)

Red means that it wouldn't let me tag you (either at all or properly)

@amyyscorner @puppysmileseungmin @lixie-phoria @yongbbokkie @spearb-99

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@marked-unknown @lanatheawesome @theblindhag @skz-f0rlif3 @f9clementine

@kalopsian-thoughts @ismelllikechlorine247 @hyunjineret @kangaracharacha @slut4colinbridgerton

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@jutdwae-archives @dazzlingjade @itzella @divineinsanity

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arcadia-of-pluto · 8 days

Text

Twist of Fate; Seventeen

Pairings; LADS OT4 x reader

Word count; 4,562

Themes; isekai, eventual smut, slowburn, canon divergence

Rating; 18+ for swearing and eventual mature themes

Notes; Only update for this week! I decided that it's better to drop my updates down from multiple to just one per week– just until I get a few buffer chapters in-between where my chapters are here and what I'm currently writing!

Also Tumblr on mobile seems to really hate anything over 4k so I'm not sure what to do when it comes to posting longer chapters– but if I do, I probably won't be able to add itallics and bold, but I'm sure no one would mind if I didn't go through and add those little details.

Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter! It's yet another memory one that will span over two chapters (including this one).

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Masterlist

“Y/n…Sweetie, wake up.” You hear a voice and a gentle hand shakes your shoulder. Your eyes slowly opened and your cheeks felt damp. Once your eyes are fully open, you wipe your face and rest a hand on your chest. It tightly grips the front of your dress as you struggle to breathe. Your gaze goes to Sylus with wide eyes and you look around, confused to see the interior of a car and not the beautiful lake you were just at.

The only reminder of your dream laid In your hand…A gem, devoid of colour as if its power had been drained, was in your palm. Was this the aether core Xavier found? No…no way that would've followed you back.

“Where..?” You were still disoriented, trying to keep a grip on which reality was your own. Your hands were trembling.

“We’re back at the house, sweetie. Or did you forget where we were going?” Sylus's voice sounds soft. It sounds too kind, much sweeter than his usual tone with you. Were you somehow in a different kind of dream now?

“No— I...” You hold your head in your shaking hands. “I had a dream...It..” You want to punch yourself in the chest– anything to try and fix the disorder nestled deep in your heart.

“I know, you started crying so suddenly. I was almost scared.” Sylus seems rather calm as he speaks, not waiting for you to elaborate as he opens the car door, “I told you it would be happening more often. You just need to be prepared for it.” His hand reaches out for you as the cool breeze nips at your skin.

“But I felt– Months passed, Sylus. Seasons changed and it’s only been an hour.” You stammer as you try to get out of the car, but your knees almost give out underneath you.

Sylus lets out a sigh and picks you up bridal style. “Was it scary?’ He asks, softly, as he carries you inside. “No…just really sad,” You reply, resting your head on his chest, “And I feel even more tired than before…I felt like I haven’t slept at all…”

“It’s just the first of many,” He muses, not bothering to ask what it was about or explain how he knew so much as he enters your room, and lays you down on your bed. “I’m sorry there’s not much I can do for you,” He speaks in a low register as he takes your hair down from its up-do, running his fingers through the strands, before he gently removes your jewelry. “But I can sit right next to the bed if you want me to. You know I don’t sleep around this time.”

You press your lips together in a thin line, before quickly nodding as you grab his hand, “Please?”

Sylus doesn’t give you a response, but he keeps a tight hold on your hand while you slowly fall back asleep…

The next memory is more involved than the last. You’re not sure who this one is about just yet, but judging by the ghastly sight of bloated corpses and water steadily filling up a ship as a storm raged on, you can only assume it’s Rafayel’s.

From what you could see, it was a dark and stormy night on the high seas. Some of the ship’s crew were talking about a sacrifice that had gone missing and to let down the sails as the stormy sea was too strong from their ship. The large boat was rocking back and forth from the force of the waves, and you almost felt seasick.

You notice waterlogged bodies floating past you as you were hidden behind a wooden storage box. Then, suddenly, your arms are seized in a tight grip and you’re dragged to the edge of the deck. Your eyes widening as the sight of the dark, unforgiven see was all you could see below. “Now throw her overboard!”

What? You were the sacrifice!?

Amidst your surprise, you begin to hear a faint melody, a song sounding as if the sea itself were singing to you. Calling out to you, almost, and like an invisible hand, the melody calms down the raging whirls of the ocean and the winds die down.

“Fools…Any further and a storm would be the last thing on your minds.”

Rafayel?

Though you can’t ponder on your thoughts for too much longer as you’re tossed overboard. Your limbs spread out in a panic as you try to slow your descent into the depths. You can hear the emissaries cheering as you, their sacrifice who was raised for years just for this very reason, finally fulfilled your purpose.

A sinking sense of fear overwhelms your body and the salty ocean water drowns out your pleas and cries for help. Briny water engulfs your body and your eyes burn as you try to keep them open from under the crashing waves. You could’ve tried to hold your breath, but it was already too late.

Your panic had caused you to take in gulps of water and you felt your vision fading. You could feel yourself slowly…and painfully suffocating. Before you lost consciousness, however, you felt something warm envelop you.

Whenever you resurfaced, you greedily gasped for air, coughing out salty water, and felt the cool rain hit your face. Then, you turn toward your savior but your pleasantries die on your lips as you meet his beautiful, otherworldly eyes.

Those familiar, charming bluish-pink eyes.

“Were you abandoned?” He asks, holding an ornate flute as he seemingly stands on top of the now calm waves. The ethereal melody you heard earlier had since disappeared as he was no longer playing his flute.

“Save me…please.” Is all you can croak out and the purple haired man chuckles. He sits down on a piece of driftwood.

Under the moonlit night sky, he looks at you, the scales on his neck emitting a faint glow. He’s lemurian?

“Did you ask for my assistance?” He asks, raising a brow as he rests his arm across his leg. Then, you take a moment to look at him, really look at him.

He had paint-like markings on his face under his right eye, the paint marks were also along his shoulders and chest. Were they tribal markings? He was wearing gold jewelry, the bangles wrapped tightly around his biceps and wrists. A sheer, blue sash across his right shoulder seemed to be the only form of top he had on and his pants were more of a white and gold tunic.

He brings you back to the situation at hand by holding his hand out to you. That’s when you realize his nails were also painted black.

You reach out toward him but, when your hands touch, flames burst forth from his fingers. You let out a squeak of surprise and jerk your hand back, but he starts laughing, amused at his little joke. You, in turn, puff your cheeks out and grab his hand tightly.

Even if this was a memory from the past, it seems Rafayel still acts just the same. It almost makes you want to stay in this dream forever, having missed the man after not seeing him for some time.

The man makes a noise in the back of his throat as you squeeze his hand, “Release me.” The scales on his neck are raised ever so slightly like a cat’s bristling fur. “I said release me!”

Another thought crosses your mind, an even older memory that a lemurian’s kiss can allow one to breathe underwater. This gives you an idea since you’re trapped in the ocean with no other way to survive, you decide to take your chances.

You suddenly reach forward to cup your hands on either side of his face, catching the man off guard, and kiss him. Your lips smash against his in a clumsy kiss, your teeth clinking together in your desperation for survival.

The lemurian lets out a small gasp of surprise as you plead with him again to save you. Your vision becomes more blurry by the second, but you desperately try to hold his gaze.

After a long silence passes, his voice rings in your ears– low…soft…almost like he’s casting a spell to enthrall someone, “I will grant you deliverance and in exchange, offer yourself, your everything to me. Become my follower mortal.”

After this exchange, you assume you passed out. You hear children whispering about whether you’re alive or not. As the conversation turns toward the children wanting to use your possible dead body for dissections, you open your eyes.

The first thing you notice is that you’re in a rather luxurious room. It’s completely covered in the colour blue. From the drapes across the windows to the bedsheets, to the walls.

The children are, understandably, surprised that you woke up in the middle of their conversation. “Where am I?” You ask, slowly sitting up, “Am I below the waves?” You realize you’re probably asking too many questions and bring your hand up to rub your temples. “Keep your distance– she bites.”

You knew that sassy demeanor like the back of your hand. You puff your cheeks out, annoyed that he had to scare those poor children with nonsense.

Rafayel stood by the door with his arms crossed over his chest and, as you took a moment to take him in during the daytime, you realized he was quite attractive. He was always attractive, but in his lemurian garb, he was all the more so.

Though, you do notice that his mouth is swollen and there seems to be a wound on his lips.

Oh, did you…

Once he meets your gaze, he glares at you. “Uhm...where am I?” You finally ask after a few moments of silence.

“A single glance would reveal that you’re in Lemuria. Treat her wounds and give her clean clothes. I’ll inform Elder Amund that we’ve found my devout follower.” He says and you fiddle with your fingers in your lap. “Uhm, you’re my savior right? I should express my gratitude—”

Though, he leaves before you can even finish your sentence.

Maybe…You should go back to the real world after all. You miss Rafayel.

A young girl with beautifully braided blue hair pops up from her hiding spot and excitedly sits on the edge of the bed, “Worry not! When Rafayel brought you back, it seemed you’d been vomiting bubbles with the crabs for a fortnight.”

Then she continued, “My name is Algie and he’s Konche. You’re the first live human we’ve met! Well...There are ones who swam along the currents, but none of them could talk like you.”

The blue haired boy next to her scolds her, “You’re scaring her, sister. Look, her hands are shaking like a shrimp seeing a whale for the first time!”

“My apologies, I didn’t mean it!” Algie quickly clasps her hands together apologetically. “You’re fine. Don’t worry about it but…May I ask why you brought me here?” You ask, head slightly tilted to the side.

“You’ll know when you visit the temple.” Algie says, “It’s a very, veerrry long tale. I’ll tell you on the way!”

She said that in the Deep Sea lies the forgotten kingdom of Lemuria and that the God of the Sea lives there. He protects whatever the briny sea touches and his followers include not just denizens of the ocean, but also humans. His most devout followers must gift him a heart so he has the strength to protect Lemuria and becomes the god recognized by the entire ocean.

Hmm…Rafayel did say ‘we found my devout follower’. Does that mean he wants your heart? And not in the romantic way??

It’s said that the Sea God of this generation was born in flames as dusk turned to dawn and only he can use fire.

Huh, Rafayel did use fire earlier…

In the Tome of the Sea god, it’s stated that in Whalefall City’s temple lies a great flame that has burned for thousands of years and that if this fire were to ever go out, then Lemuria shall fall into a deep slumber for centuries.

So…to keep the flame alive, the Sea God requires a certain human follower. It cannot be a lemurian, it must be a human because they are some of the most selfish, greediest creatures so when they offer their hearts, love, or even their lives, it’s considered the most precious form of worship. This Tome also confirms that Rafayel will be the last God of the Sea.

Once in the temple with Rafayel, you gaze upon the fire in the middle of the room. It almost resembles a sun about to go out.

“She’s most suited to be the one.” You hear Rafayel say and you really hope he doesn’t mean to toss you into the fire as a sacrifice. “Her?” You hear an older voice from across the room.

A man in a robe, holding a staff, questions, “She is the human your Quintessence has decided on?”

“‘Twas more of fate’s whimsy. I wandered about on the earth and became her cushion when she fell.” Rafayel speaks as if you were a stray animal that he had brought home out of the kindness of his heart.

“For now, I shall forget that your Quintessence snuck out and burned the guard’s hair. I must ask again, is she truly to be the human your Quintessence is bound to?”

“As long as the Sea God’s ceremony is assured, I’ll make her my follower.” Is all Rafayel says in response before he goes back to being the sassy Rafayel you truly know, “However, we should remove all of her teeth and nails. I worry she’d bite and scratch us if given the opportunity.”

“I-I don’t think that’s a good idea,” You finally manage to get a sentence out. Amund sighs, “Once a lemurian is bound to someone, it’s impossible to go against their wishes. She will have the power to command your Quintessence. When the two of you barely know each other, is that something worth giving?”

The light flickers on Rafayel’s face and he lowers his head to ruminate about his answer. Then, the Elder leaves so you and Rafayel are alone.

“So…if you’ve yet to decide, can I be set free? I promise I won’t speak of this to anyone.” Though you try your luck, Rafayel continues to stand there. “The day has dragged on long enough. I’m tired.” He sighs, finding a comfortable spot on the floor to sit down.

“What’re you doing?” You question, still standing up. “Sleeping.” He answers simply. “Why??” You are appalled but Rafayel continues, “Wake me before nightfall.”

“You—”

He ignores you, leaning his back against a marble pillar as he closes his eyes. The temple is heavily guarded, so all you can do is sit in a corner and ponder how you were going to escape. Though your thoughts are regularly interrupted by Rafayel’s breathing and after an hour of it, you’re fed up by it. “Rafayel! Ra-fay-el!” You try to wake him up, hands on your hips. Though, he doesn’t react.

A small blue fish suddenly appears and begins swimming around his shoulders.

“Oh– where did you come from? You’re so cute...” You muse, reaching a finger out to poke the fish with a small smile on your lips. “Do you know the way out, Oh little fish?” The fish swims in a circle and settles on your finger as you softly giggle at it. “Do you understand me?” You softly ask the fish, completely endeared with it, “Could you show me a way out?”

Flicking its translucent tail, the fish swims to the stained-glass window behind the alcove...

“Half a day has disappeared like sea foam,” You sigh, walking through the beautiful hallway of the temple, “Why have we returned to these crossroads?” A pout dances across your lips, “Do you lack a sense of direction or do all fish have terrible memory?”

Twirling its tail, the fish suddenly swims into a crowd and leaves you behind. “Where–” You sigh, shaking your head, “I can’t believe I’m trying to talk to a fish.” The fish finally leads you to a coral reef and goes into a small hole in the city’s walls.

“Do I have to swim through that?” You question and the fish spits bubbles at you, almost as if trying to communicate. “I’m coming. I'm coming.” You sigh, swimming through the narrow passageway until you’re on a beach alcove.

You dust the sand off of your knees in triumph. “I’ve definitely got to think of a way to express my gratitude to the fishies…I could possibly feed them during the Sea God’s ceremony,” You murmur to yourself.

“Was it fun to explore Lemuria?”

You nearly jump out of your skin at the sound of Rafayel’s voice. “Rafayel!?”

“There is no need to shout my name.” He says behind a silk curtain, before he steps out to face you.

He lifts his finger and the little fish swims around it, then transforms into a blue scale that lands in his palm. The fish was his own creation!?

“You planned this?” You groan. “‘Twas a test for you. Elder Amund was right. Human promises are nothing but meaningless words.” “Huh– When did I make a vow to you??” You were a bit exasperated.

“I told you to wake me before nightfall, didn’t I?” Rafayel crosses his arms over his chest and then yawns, seemingly not upset in the slightest. “Besides, when I saved you from the ocean’s clutches, we made an oath. Did you forget?”

“That…counted? Look, you’re the sea god, respectful and awe-inspiring. Can’t you consider my rescue an act of kindness and let me go?” You rub the back of your neck as you look away from the man.

“I am not a God who answers every whim. The ceremony is to take place in a month and, as you’re aware, ceremonies always need–” He rests his chin in his hand as he narrows his eyes, filling you with a sense of dread.

“...Followers right? There are plenty on land. You know? The ones who wear robes and pray to you every day. They’re more devout than me.” You quickly cut him off, not wanting to hear him say the word ‘sacrifices’.

“Alright…Then, return to me your life.” He says, one hand on his hip. His other hand reaches out toward you as if grabbing an invisible rope that’s tied tightly around your neck. Though you're unsure of what he’s doing, suddenly you can’t breathe.

You place a hand over your chest, doubling over for a moment as you reach toward your throat and cough. Water enters your nose and throat. Did he…take away your ability to breathe underwater? “Wait, wait!” You panic, air bubbles escaping your mouth as you try to speak, “I’ll do anything you ask!”

Suddenly, a grin spreads across Rafayel’s lips and he loosens his hold. You find yourself able to breathe again. “‘Tis not worship I desire. From the very depths of your soul, I seek only the purest devotion.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“The tides ebb and flow and with every setting sun is a moon rising. ‘Till time’s end, I should occupy your every thought. You must believe in me alone.” Rafayel says as he walks closer to you and your eyes widen a bit.

Okay, that’s hot—

“You mean I…” You trail off and the tips of your ear turn a pretty shade of pink. “Think of it from another perspective,” He pokes your chest, specifically where your heart lies. He acts as if he’s stating a truth, “Thou must find a means by which thy heart becomes smitten with me.”

‘Find someone who will kiss you, even if you do not give them the world. Love a soul that is like your own, that which compliments you. Love and death are the most important things in life. Death is a matter of time, so love with all your heart can muster.’

- Lemuria: Tome of the Sea God, Chapter 3

The two of you ended up sneaking to the top of the temple’s spire to watch the sunset. After a few days, you had grown used to the Lemurian’s snarky demeanor. You had also learned a bit more about him, like how he doesn’t like people touching him but is fine with you gently holding his hand.

You recall Amund saying that once the Sea God is bound to a person, they’ll do anything they command so as Rafayel sits down in the shade to nap, you decide to bother him for a bit. His eyes are closed with his arms crossed over his chest, so you reach your hand out to grab his.

“Make some flames for me,” You ask. Rafayel lifts his fingers up before curling them back around yours, but doesn’t say a word.

“Hmm...I didn’t work at all,” You murmur with a pout. “Don’t waste your time.” He lazily opens his eyes. “One should practice silence when watching the sunset.” He drops your hand, resting his arm on his propped up knee.

“Do you want to see the real sun, Rafayel?”

“I do not.” He simply says and the blue fish from earlier reappears. “You wanted to sneak onto the beach the day we met,” You say as the fish swirls around his palm.

“Your tongue barely moved when we first met. Back then you were rather…” He trails off, bringing his hand up to his mouth to tap his lips.

A crimson red blush appears on his ear tips before spreading across his cheeks. His eyes widen as he catches your gaze and he quickly looks away.

“This side of you is much more to my liking.” He finally finishes his sentence.

You tap his shoulder, “Hey, so on the surface we have a Sea God ceremony too. We play wonderful songs on lyres and...”

“Were the surface world as lovely as you claimed, you’d be elsewhere,” He glances toward you before looking back up at the light in the distance.

“There are evil people on the surface! Once they learnt you were Lemurian, your tears that turn into pearls would be harvested day after day endlessly.” You try to spook him, though deep down you knew there would actually be humans as evil as that. Rafayel crosses his arms over his chest as he shakes his head, “If you were to persuade me to bring you to the beach, you’ll run away.”

Though after a few moments of silence, Rafayel leans back against the marble column behind him. “Is the surface world’s sunset different from the one in the ocean?”

“Honestly...my memory of it is hazy…” You trail off as he closes his eyes and you take your chance to sit closer to him. Your head slowly drifts down to rest against the column as well– close to him but not touching him since you recall him saying he doesn’t like to be touched.

“You take me to see the sun and I’ll take you to see the festival...What do you think?” You ask as you look up at him, drinking every detail of his face. Though, as silence fills the room, you realize Rafayel had most likely fallen asleep. The tranquil nature of the situation also somehow makes you sleepy as well and your head leans against his shoulder, almost close enough to touch his head.

Though, you’re hesitant to fully lean against his shoulder. Suddenly you feel a hand on your shoulder, pulling you closer and hear Rafayel tiredly go, “Mmhm.” almost as if saying you’re okay to lean on him. You lift your gaze to look up at his face, worried he was awake, but all you see is his closed eyes. His face way too close to yours, so you instead close your eyes and rest your head on his chest as you join him in sleep…

After a few days, Rafayel decides to go to the beach with you to watch his own celebration first hand. You tell him of how the emissaries on land had adopted you and raised you as a follower of the sea god, only to tell you that you were a sacrifice years later.

You talk of how you wouldn’t have been able to escape because of the island’s size. It was nice to be able to actually talk with someone about your situation for once.

Then, you both enter the festival with driftwood masks that Rafayel made and you overhear a storyteller.

“Unable to break his vow with the girl and his own burning passion, the God of the Sea left the ocean and lived happily ever after with his beloved...”

The children talk amongst themselves after the puppet show. “But Lemuria is centered around bonds. Without it, the Sea God won’t remember or obey her!” A little girl says, clearly upset over the ending.

“What are you talking about? The God of the Sea will find his beloved and live happily ever after,” The little boy next to her sighs, not understanding her.

The young girl lets out a huff of annoyance before tugging at your sleeve as she looks up at you, “What do you think, Miss? Will the Sea God be with her because he loves her or because of their vow?” “Uh...” You glance over at Rafayel before clearing your throat, “All of those legends of Lemuria are just made-up nonsense…”

Though, you seem to have made the wrong choice as the children start crying. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t...” You panic, not used to being around children enough to deal with the situation.

“What about you, Sir? Does Lemuria exist? Would the Sea God gift his heart to a human?” The girl quickly turns to Rafayel for an answer.

The man in question, the Sea God himself, rests his chin on his hand before nodding, “He would. Lemuria is my homeland, so that is how I know.”

Should...he be saying that? You tried to cover his mouth with your hands, but he pushed you away.

“What are Lemurians like?” She asked, excitedly.

“Hmm…Their tears turn into glimmering pearls, and their voices bring dreams of wonder. Their blood can make one live forever or even resurrect the dead.” You really don’t think Rafayel should be saying this but the girl quickly sighs, “I already knew that.”

“Lemurians don’t fall in love with people they’re bound to. ‘Tis a human fantasy.” Rafayel says with a shrug and you can’t help but frown.

“What else?” The little girl jumps up and down.

“Are you that curious?” Rafayel teases with a smile ghosting across his lips. It seems like the Sea God adores children– how cute.

Though, you could only faintly hear the conversation from afar, having walked away after Rafayel said Lemurians don’t fall in love with the humans they’re bound to.

Hmph, you’d just drink your sorrows away with some pomegranate wine.

You take a sip of the wine, being distracted by all of the lights and stalls like an excited little puppy.

Suddenly, the girl walks up to you and tugs on your sleeve again. “Miss! Your friend said that if you don’t return soon, he won’t keep waiting.”

Also, woah! I did not expect my bad weather drabbles to blow up like they did! Does that mean yall want to see more drabbles in the future?

If yall have any ideas for some, I'd love to, at least, try them out! Because I really didn't expect so many people to actually like it. I kept checking my Tumblr and being like "woah 35 notifs???" And then I'd check again and "WAIT, there's 25 more???" So, I'd love to keep doing them. They'd be good to post in-between my ToF schedule!

Hope yall enjoyed this chapter! I'm hoping it still makes sense that the reader can't fully control their body during these memories...I'm not really sure how to convey that tbh.

Taglist; @orphicmeliora , @yoongi-tunes , @mitzkooni , @hiqhkey, @tanspostsblog

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sunflowersandsapphires · 1 month

Text

Make a mess of me

Of Oak and Ivy, Chapter 9

Series Masterlist Next Chapter

pairing: Matt Murdock x fem!reader

summary: In college, Matt Murdock had two best friends, Foggy Nelson and you. However, life had no intention of letting you graduate with him. When he reconnects with you in adulthood, he is troubled to see the hand God has dealt you and vows to use every tool at his disposal to save you from damnation.

warnings: SMUT. YES FULL P IN V SMUT. (don't get too excited y'all, the pining isn't over yet.) swearing, slight degradation, underage drinking

a/n: The biggest shout out to @gracethyomen for ghostwriting the sexy parts because my asexual ass had no idea what I was doing. This was the first time I ever attempted smut so I hope you all like it. As always, comments and reblogs help encourage me to write more!

w/c: 3.1k

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT:

The floorboards beneath Matt’s feet trembled as the throbbing bass boomed throughout the bar. Around him, groups of students screamed along to the lyrics of the pop song blaring through the DJ's speakers. Gripping the neck of his lukewarm beer, he lifted the bottle to his mouth—met with more resistance than he was expecting when the ancient remnants of spilled drinks on the tabletop clung to the glass. He tried not to scrunch his nose as his finger drifted across a patch of an unidentified sticky substance on the surface in front of him.

Shoving thoughts of the unpleasant sensation aside, Matt chugged the rest of his bottle, relishing in the warm current rippling through his veins as his past few drinks finally started to take effect. Breathing deeply, his lips twitched up. Despite the stifling heat of bodies grinding against each other and the acrid smell of vomit coating the place, he felt wildly at ease. His senses were still overactive, but he could feel them dulling as his brain grew fuzzy. Face slackening as his cheeks turned rosy, his mouth broke into a full grin.

“Are you feelin' it, Murdock?” Foggy laughed, clapping him on the back clumsily. His roommate's breath, which reeked of bottom shelf vodka, clouded against Matt's cheek as he patted the other man's back.

Smiling dopily, Matt leaned into the arm Foggy had around him. “Not at all,” His sentence broke off into a laugh he didn't recognize. Had that come from him?

“Oh he's feelin' it.” Foggy cackled gleefully, tossing a proud look to the girl across the table from the two. “I told ya: the cheap stuff works faster.”

“I'll have to agree with you there, buddy.” Matt snorted, rolling his loosening shoulders.

“I'm still not convinced.” The girl giggled. Her dangling earrings clinked on their chains as she shook her head.Matt hid a knowing smile behind the lip of his now-empty bottle as he felt her and Foggy flush with warmth in tandem, their pulses sprinting like jackrabbits.

"Oh Foggy would know. It's not his first time here." Matt squeezed his friend’s knee, shoving it towards the girl in what he hoped was an obvious gesture. "Did he tell you how he met the bouncer?"

Puffing out his chest, Foggy beamed. Launching into a rather embellished story of how he'd met the senior by saving his younger sister from being mugged. Nothing had happened really, he'd yelled at the guy (who had promptly scurried off), but Matt kept his mouth shut. Who was he to deny Foggy a connection with this girl he was clearly into?

If only he could tell Foggy that she was equally into him, that he didn't need to try so hard. Keeping his senses a secret from his best friend was nearly impossible when alcohol lowered his guard.

His face must have fallen because Foggy scoffed at him. "What did I say, Murdock?"

"Nothing, I just realized it's my turn to buy a round." Matt gave an exaggerated grimace, his body flooding with relief when Foggy and his admirer laughed in response.

"Buy another three shots," Foggy requested, turning back to his admirer. "I'm not done trying to convince Miss Stahl here that she's going about this 'drinking' thing all wrong."

"Trying to get me drunk, Nelson?" The girl responded smugly, tilting her head at him.

"Hey, we'll see where the night takes us," Foggy stated emphatically, spreading his arms wide.

Matt smirked, shoving his chair away from the table and heading to the bar. Squeezing his way through the crowd of his inebriated classmates, he gripped the sticky bartop to cement his place in line. Hearing the bartender drift towards him, he threw up a hand and called out the request.

“Sure thing, man. It'll be a minute.” The bartender called back, busying himself with the plate of cocktails he seemed to be making for the gaggle of sorority girls off to Matt's left.

Matt nodded politely, leaning his weight against the sturdy wood planks of the bar. The air around him shifted as the scantily-clad girls split off towards an open table, one staying behind to bring the drinks. The hair on his neck prickled as her attention turned toward him. He couldn't help but smile as he felt her heart rate speed up, her limbs flooding with renewed warmth. Stepping closer to him cautiously, her hair rustled as she tucked it behind her ear.

“Matthew Murdock, right?” She asked, taking a seat on the stool next to Matt's hip.

“Who wants to know?” He asked with a cocky grin, tilting his head at her.

She giggled in response, her chin tipping towards her chest for a moment before she held out a clammy hand. “Shelby Norton. Um, I'm holding out my hand and I now realize you can't see that.”

With a soft laugh of his own, he held out his own hand. “I'm Matt. Nice to meet you, Shelby.” She clasped her small hand around his, shaking once before withdrawing her arm.

“Nice to meet you too. We had Torts together, last semester, I think.”

“Did we? I'm sorry, I'm not great with faces.” He joked, taking a step closer to her when she laughed.

“That's alright. I was always too shy to speak up, but I loved your comments on the cases we read. Especially when we discussed MacPherson.”

Matt felt his ego glow with pride. She'd clearly had her eyes on him for some time then. A slight blush crept up his neck and across his cheeks. “You're too sweet, thank you. Did your friends also force you to buy them a round?"

"Uh sort of," She snorted, twisting her hands around each other. "I'm trying to rush a sorority next month so a friend of mine invited me out to 'get to know' some of the girls. They told me freshmen had to pay."

"Mmm that's a shit deal." Matt sympathized, pouting a bit to express his distaste of the hazing. "I could split the cost with you, if it would help."

"Oh you don't have to do that!" Shelby protested, but Matt held up a hand and plastered on his most convincing smile.

"Well, how else would I be able to buy you a drink?" He slid the tip of his tongue over his bottom lip as she giggled in response. His heart was strumming in tandem with hers, arousal growing as he picked up the scent of hers being carried on the stale bar air. Slipping a bill from the stack on his pocket, he pressed them into her palm.

“That's really sweet of you, Matt. How can I repay you?" Shelby chuckled sweetly, perching on the edge of her seat as she traced his forearm with a single finger. As she drew a line over his skin, goosebumps rose in the wake of her touch. She didn’t have long nails, he realized when he could feel the warmth from the pad of her finger when she touched him. He could hear her heart beating just a tiny bit faster at the contact, making him smile minutely. Eager. He didn’t mind it.

“Do you always proposition people when they offer you drinks?” He teased, “If so, what would a beer get me?”

He heard the soft sound of her lips separating as she smiled at his joke, leaning in to brush her lips across the shell of his ear before she whispered breathily. “Forget the beer.” With that same finger that had run the length of his lower arm she turned his chin just a bit to better align their mouths, pecking him gently on the lips to test the waters.

He took the bait, molding his mouth to hers with a soft sigh, near-empty beer bottle forgotten- somewhere? He didn’t care enough to worry where he’d left it, prepared to lose himself in the warm body currently wrapping a toned leg around his calf.

“Is your roommate here with you?” Shelby murmured against his mouth, stroking her other hand down the front of his threadbare shirt to the button on his worn-out jeans.

“He’s not coming back later.” He reassured her, winding fingers through her hair to the back of her neck. “Something tells me he got lucky.”

“Not as lucky as you’re about to be.” She cooed, nipping lightly at his jawline.

“What about the group you came with? Won’t they miss you?” Matt asked, a bit breathlessly.

“Let them.” Shelby answered, tangling her fingers with his and tugging him towards the open door at the back of the bar.

"That was so good babe," Everett groaned, setting his fork down with a clink.

“It's boxed macaroni, don’t get too ahead of yourself.” You chided, laughing lightly as you plopped the cardboard container on top of the teetering stack of empty beer cans in the recycling bin. “Okay what are we watching?”

“I’m still kinda hungry.” Everett confessed with a knowing smirk, leaning towards you across the small couch as you took your seat.

“You want me to put another pot on?” You asked, moving to stand again to make more macaroni.

“Not exactly what I had in mind,” He growled, tugging you into his lap with one quick movement. Yelping in surprise, the sound quickly morphed into a pleased hum as his lips landed on yours.

“Ah, I see. This was your plan all along.” You murmured between heated pecks. “Praise my work in the kitchen so I'd take you to the bedroom.”

“This is a studio apartment, babe. This is the bedroom.” Everett noted, jerking his head towards the full bed in the other corner of the room. Sliding a large palm between your shoulder blades, he held you steady as you arched into his touch, smashing your lips to his again. His free hand roamed over your body, sliding over your thigh before gripping it gently. As his thumb continued to swipe from side to side, you sighed appreciatively, rocking your hips into his in response.

“So worked up already?” He laughed, bringing his mouth to your jawline and pressing a line of open-mouthed kisses towards your pulse point. “Slow down, babe. We've got all the time in the world.”

Anticipation fading slightly, you nodded, feeling heat rush to your cheeks. “Sorry.” You tried to push away the feeling of being scolded, especially with Ev’s hands being where they were. You wanted to enjoy this as much as he always seemed to.

Smiling with a small chuckle, Everett didn't answer, simply locking his lips with yours again.

Cupping her neck gently, Matt rested his forehead against hers—breaking their lips to allow her to come up for air.

“You doin' ok?” He panted, heat flaring in his gut as her soft hands continued to draw patterns over the skin of his waist despite his interruption.

Nodding against him, she gulped in a breath. “Oh yah.”

Smiling hungrily, Matt pulled her back to him once more. “Glad to hear it, beautiful.”

Touching his lips to hers once again, Matt relished in the feeling of her body responding to his; a simple kiss throwing her off balance enough that he was practically keeping her upright. Swiping his tongue over her bottom lip, he grinned into the kiss when she moaned in response.

Stumbling backwards until his calves touched his mattress, he planted himself on it, lifting her onto his lap without breaking the kiss. Her arms released his hips, flattening on the bed as she pressed her chest into his. Following her lead, Matt collapsed against the stack of pillows, threading his hand into her soft hair.

Unlatching her mouth from his, she grinned against his lips, taking a moment to catch her breath. “Sorry, I got winded.”

Chuckling, Matt rubbed his thumb over her scalp comfortingly. “That's alright. Take your time, sweetheart.”

Her rounded nails dragged down his chest as she admired him for a moment. “Wanna take this off?”

“Happy to.” Matt pulled the shirt over his head, tossing it to the floor as she did the same with hers.

Straightening his posture as the brisk air pummeled his exposed chest, Matt felt a smug grin creep onto his face as her heart rate spiked, her eyes trailing down toward the button of his jeans. “Like what you see?” He teased, trailing a finger over her arm and towards her jawline.

“Mmhmm.” She nearly whimpered, digging her fingers into his biceps as she dove into him for another heated kiss. “You're gorgeous, Matt.”

He chuckled into her mouth, tugging on her bottom lip with his teeth as he cupped one of her covered breasts. “Can I take this off?”

“Please.” She whined, fumbling with the button of his pants.

Tightening one fist around the bottom of the headboard, you rutted your hips further onto the head of Ev’s cock, hissing with pleasure as it stretched your cunt. He continued to slam his dick into you, the slow, delicate rhythm quickly boring your libido. The orgasm you craved began floating further and further from your desperate reach.

Moaning his name, you cupped his ass with your free hand, shoving his hips closer to your own. The twinge of wonderful pain made your vision flicker, and your optimism returned--only to be quickly snuffed out when the building hazy sensation receded once again.

“Fuck!” You cried out, gritting your teeth in frustration as the shaft of your boyfriend's cock pumped in and out of you. Digging your nails into his flesh, you dropped your hand from the headboard, trailing it over your stomach before running a finger over your own clit.

Your hips bucked with pleasure, a moan slipping through your parted lips.

“You close, sweetie?” Everett asked, between pants.

“Yah,” You nodded, drawing circles over your sensitive bud and grinning as orgasm once again descended upon you. Your pulse jumped, blood rushing from your heart towards your slick thighs. Pleasure began to crest over you, it's fantastic cloud slowly wafting up and—

With a ferocious movement, Everett slammed his cock into you, knocking your head into the bed frame with the force. Great. Bubble popped, you traced circles over your clit with renewed urgency as Everett began to moan.

Sliding his tongue back into her, Matt smiled against her entrance as Shelby arched her spine with a moan. Gripping her shuddering thighs with vigor, he pulled back, perching over her with a smirk. Her arousal clung to his nose and stubbled chin. Letting his hand drift back down to her thighs, he traced delicate swirls up and down them as she caught her breath.

“Fuck, Matt. That was—”

“Good?” He asked loftily, as if he couldn't read her body like a braille essay.

She chuckled, grabbing his neck and yanking him down for a kiss. Her tongue slid into his mouth readily, mixing the taste of stale alcohol with the arousal coating his tongue. Shifting one knee in between her legs, he hummed happily as she began grinding her hips over his leg.

Nudging her face with his own, he licked a stripe over her neck, kissing the tender skin there before sinking his teeth in carefully.

“Matt!” Shelby cried, hands grappling for his waist as he continued to bruise her neck.

Cupping one of her breasts in his hand, he circled her nipple with his thumb before dragging his fingertip over the stiff bud as she bucked her hips with a whimper. His stiff cock stretched the fabric of his boxers as the noises continued to fall from her lips without pause. Ridding himself of his final piece of clothing, he traced a finger through her dripping folds.

“You ready, sweetheart?”

“Yes, Matt, please!” She begged, heart pounding in her chest as she chased another orgasm.

Readying his cock in front of her entrance, he slowly lowered his hips until the head was inside of her, giving her a moment to adjust to the stretch. Gasping in a breath, her hands—still grasping his waist—contracted, hauling him closer to her.

Smiling wildly, Matt rutted forward, groaning in pleasure as her walls squeezed his dick. She was quivering beneath him, whining his name as climax rapidly approached.

“Oh fuck, yes. Yes!” Everett growled.

He was close. And if you were planning on not faking your own climax, you needed to speed this process up.

Wetting your lips, you let your mind flood with images of Everett kissing you, marking your neck with his perfect teeth, tugging your hair—things he hadn't done since the first month or so of your relationship. The way droplets of sweat would creep down his torso after he worked out. The way he kissed you after you got an answer right in a tutoring session. Clasping your neck in his large palm as if you were the most precious thing in the world. Because you were. You were his girl.

Whimpering as your body leaned into the growing thrill, you bit your lip to keep from screaming as a voice echoed in your mind.

“That's it sweetheart, just like that. So good for me.” The familiar rumble was delectable, drawing you in like a moth to the flame. You moaned softly, keening upwards with desire. The voice hanging over you chuckled smugly. “You like when I praise you, hm?”

“Yes,” You responded, letting your eyes fly open as orgasm finally reached you. Hovering above you, was the source of the voice. Blank hazel eyes, customary devilish smirk, gorgeous dark hair—all staring back at you as you shook with orgasm.

Not Everett.

Matt.

His low voice looped in your ears as you rode out your high. “So good for me, sweetheart. So good.”

Letting your eyes flutter shut with a massive exhale, you sagged against the mattress as the muscular body on top of you went rigid. A different voice—Everett's voice—groaning with delight as he came. “Fuck, that's it! Yes, yes, yes!”

Opening your eyes again, your brain went blank. All you could do was lay there and heave in breaths, your body still sparking with the remnants of an electric climax. Everett planted a sloppy kiss on your mouth, collapsing against the mattress beside you.

“Damn, babe. Talk about an ego boost. I don't think I've ever heard you make sounds like that.”

Chuckling nervously, you tipped your head to grant him access as he pressed his rough lips against your pulse point. “Yah, yah it was good.”

Snorting, Everett tucked you against his side, your sweaty skin pulling slightly as it dragged against his. “That might've been the best I've ever had, seriously.”

“Yah, me too.” You murmured, reality and dread settling in your chest like dead weight.

Taglist: @eugene-emt-roe @abbyhaslongshorts @mrs-bellingham @abucketofweird @yeonalie @jadeunstablexx @spider-murdock @0ctober-writes @danzer8705 @mattmurdockstateofmind @supervoldejaygent @dorothleah @zomtart @marytheweefrenchie @cheshirecat484 @siampie @ignore-mp3 @silas-aeiou @rev-glut @screechingphantommaker @spiderstyles04 @paradox-brody-chase @msjb2002 @blue-devil-of-the-lord @pigeonmama @daisy-arien0 @yarrystyleeza

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a-star-that-burns-brightly · 4 days

Text

CH2-13 Thoughts + CH2-14 Predictions

Hello DRDT Fandom! CH2-13 came out about four or so days ago as I'm posting this, and I finally mustered up the energy and mental strength to write down my overall thoughts, and also general predictions for what I think is to come in the next episode. A lot happened in this episode and we have a lot to cover, so let's get started! Before we do though, I think I should give us a reminder of where we currently are in terms of the swear chart and the bingo card, as of CH2-12 Swear Statistics

Bingo Card

Just like the last post, I'll be separating my talking points into character categories, so let's jump straight in with the big man himself...

Levi

Quick Disclaimer: I myself am still trying to unlearn the mindset that having low or no empathy is in any way a moral failing. If I say anything wrong or rude, please politely correct me. Remember kids: Your feelings, thoughts, and emotions, what you feel and how you feel them if you do at all, do not have any moral weight, they are simply aspects of your brain and you cannot control your brain. The only thing that has moral weight is your actions.

So as we learned in the previous episode, Levi has the murderer secret! And as we learn in this episode, he apparently killed four people, one of which being his father. DRDT continues to take Danganronpa's standard tropes and incorporating them in unique ways, in this case Levi represents the trope of the Chapter 2 Serial Killer reveal (Genocide Jack, Peko, Maki). I love that DRDT keeps doing this and I hope it keeps it up You know what else is staying consistent, though?

(x) Levi: That incident happened when I was in my junior year of high school. Levi: My junior year was also the year that Hope's Peak scouted me as the Ultimate Personal Stylist. Levi: To my understanding, it would've reflected poorly on Hope's Peak to recruit a murderer, so they pressured the court into not pressing charges.

US-HPA being morally corrupt as all fuck, that's what! Like no, seriously, it makes more and more sense as for why Xander David and Mai were most likely forming a revolution against this damn place, cause wow. The choice to scout out Levi during his Junior Year, when he was still in high school, is...interesting. Given that this Hope's Peak takes in College-aged students, why not just wait until Levi has graduated high school? In fact, that probably would've been even better because by then Levi definitely would've perfected his skills in styling by then, and thus would further justify him being enrolled in the academy. We don't know whether or not Levi was scouted before or after his incident, but given how Levi explains the events, I'm willing to bet this was after. Which...makes thing especially strange. But I'm sure it's no big deal. I mean, it's not like we have any evidence of US-HPA preying on vulnerable childre--

(x) Min: The Ultimate Contest for Eminent Students was made for a very specific target audience. Min: Those children who had no talents, who would consider spending their entire lives preparing for one single test for even a chance to become an Ultimate...

Oh. Well isn't that funny, huh?

Part of Hope's Peak's branding in general is the promise of a better future, which is something that Levi clearly wants. So I can most definitely see why the idea of being enrolled in the academy appealed to him. Levi being a delinquent in his teenage years definitely tracks, given how we know that his family was full of bad influences (including himself more than likely). And I am absolutely not surprised that Levi ended up killing his father. I think a lot of us theorized for a while that the person he killed was linked to his family.

I'd absolutely adore to learn more about Levi's family situation and what exactly their relationship with each other was, because "We were bad influences on each other" can mean a lot of things. Given the fact that not even the police cared about the death of Levi's father, I'd be pretty willing to believe that Mr. Fontana is a wanted man who has done a lot of criminal harm to others. That might even be where Levi formed the mindset that people are defined by their actions. Maybe, that's my best guess and it doesn't even include his mother and brothers, lmao. Anyway, that's enough of Murder, Corruption, and Daddy Issues. Let's talk about the other thing that was revealed about Levi this episode, or more-so put into words. His low, if zero empathy. Firstly, those who are headcannoning Levi is ASPD, I see you and I love you. So much. But I would be lying if I didn't admit that my first thought upon watching this scene was "Levi is so Autismcoded" lmao But in all seriousness, I absolutely adore this side of his character. In general something I've always loved about Levi is the fact that he, to put it bluntly, does not know how to act. He's constantly seeing what others do and copying them, and asking them for guidance when he doesn't know what to do. His first appearance shows him using Xander and Teruko's appearances to wager what kind of person they are, which is more than likely how he got into styling in the first place. He's basically masking and trying to appear as what he views as normal because he's aware that his lack of empathy is not something most humans possess. And his actions reflect that of what he thinks a good person would do in these scenarios, whether that be your friends not inviting you to an event, or someone profusely bleeding from their neck. To put it in simple terms: He's masking. I love that. It really reminds me of the experiences had by my neurodivergent friends, and even though Levi is not canonically neurodivergent, the fact that so many people headcannon him with ASPD or Autism really goes to show how DT-Dev nailed that kind of experience, and how well they wrote Levi's low empathy in general. Well-done, DT-Dev :D ...Also I think it's safe to say that Accomplice!Levi is not happening. Damn it, I really liked that theory lmao.

Ace

[not even three minutes later]

...See, this is why I always believed Ace was telling the truth about David and Arei's conversation, because wow this man is competing with the former in the Shitty Liar Olympics.

If Ace's sense of security around Levi wasn't already shattered, it sure as hell is now. Which is very upsetting to see, but also very entertaining to me as an aficionado of toxic yaoi. I was never really an Acevi girl, it was just never something I was attracted to (probably because for a majority of CH2 Part 1's airing I really didn't like Ace lmao), but this combined with the Other Thing I'll talk about later has definitely sold me on it. I hope they get worse.

I can't remember what post it was, but I remember seeing someone talk about Ace very much projecting a friendship onto Levi that was never really there between them, and looking back, I absolutely agree. I mean, where the two of them really friends? I do think that Levi does, or did, genuinely like Ace. I don't think he would've been hanging around him in Chapter 1 if he didn't. But it was simply just that, he liked Ace. Ace loved Levi, and saw him as his lifeboat in the midst of this scary unfamiliar situation. Even if everyone else either was annoyed by or straight-up disliked Ace, even if he could die at any moment, he could still rely on Levi as a presence of safety and security, but that all came crumbling down.

ace can you please change your sprite

The fact that Ace, the man famous for jumping to conclusions, not thinking anything through or in depth, and switching his opinions on others on a dime, is even asking for Levi's defense at all, is proof enough to me that even after everything Ace still wanted to cling onto the fantasy of their friendship he had built up in his mind. But upon hearing that Levi never cared about what happened to him, he can no longer do so. ...And why do I think Ace got attached to Levi so quickly?

(x) Ace: I was totally right all along to burn our friendship--No, I can't even call it it "Friendship." Ace: There's only one person in my whole life who I've ever been able to call my friend. That I ever thought, even for just a short time, that you and I were "friends" is an insult to his memory.

Yeah it's time to talk about this.

So for those who are not in the know, DT-Dev confirmed in a now-deleted ask that this friend of Ace's is named Taylor Riley.

(thank you to @/nicohakobyan / weightedblankett on twitter for providing this screenshot)

We know very little about this man other than his name, his gender, the fact that he was Ace's friend, and that he's dead. We don't actually know that fourth one, but I think "insult to his memory" speaks for itself lmao. As such, we do not know the details of his relationship with Ace... But I've made more out of less before, so let's get to talking. Here's what I think:

I think that Taylor was a presence in Ace's life much similar to how Levi was to him in Chapter 1: A strong protective figure that helped to make the scared-of-everything Ace feel a sense of safety. And then some form of incident happened that resulted in Taylor's death, leaving Ace alone, heartbroken, bitter, and terrified. That sense of security he once had was ripped away from him, and without Taylor, he doesn't know what to do with himself anymore.

And then in the killing game, he meets Levi, who provides him with a similar feeling of safety. Immediately he begins to project the memory of Taylor onto Levi and as such becomes attached, quickly considering Levi a friend because of it. And I'm not entirely pulling this idea that Ace was projecting Taylor onto Levi out of my ass, either.

Ace: dark blue/purple (reasoning: refuses to provide reasoning)

When we first got this answer, most people assumed this was referring to Levi, but I honestly think it is more likely that this is referring to Taylor. But those colors are still part of Levi's design, which automatically sets up a parallel between both Levi and Taylor Ace projected his relationship and the memory of Taylor onto a man he barely knew, and when that man lost his patience with him, his fantasy was swiftly kicked with the steel-toed shoe of reality. Hell, Ace's reaction after Levi snapped at him may had been due to his illusion of safety crumbling beneath him, but going down the road of this theory, Levi snapping at him might've been the first time Ace truly saw Levi and not Taylor. He had been giving this man a script and a role to play, and Levi responded by tearing up the paper and telling him to fuck off. In a sense, you could say that in that moment, Ace lost Taylor a second time.

Since I don't think Ace is going to be the killer as he was knocked out and thus did not have any knowledge of the murder mechanism (at least not including the theory that he tried to kill himself, which... Is a possibility, but I don't think that's the case). And if he does live past his chapter, I honestly think Chapter 3 will mark his breaking point. Any fantasy of Levi that he was clinging onto with his pinky has now shattered into pieces ten times over, the person who tried to kill him is still alive and for all he knows, could do it again whenever the hell they want to and people will take their side over his own. Next to no one in the cast likes him and they make that explicitly clear, and worse of all, he will still be trapped in this godforsaken...whatever facility this place is meant to be. So to cap off this section that got way too long, Ace Trauma Dump is on my Chapter 3 bingo card, and if we get to see Taylor and his design includes dark blue and purple I will actually become spaghettified. Please survive Ace, you are finally starting to become not C-Tier

Hu and Veronika

Lumping these two together because I have about the same amount to say about both of them and their secrets were revealed together. Hu's secret is the Hopeless Child one, and Veronika's is the Self Harm one. I think after CH2 Part 1 most of us predicted as such, but it's still very satisfying to be right. What I'm more interested is this supposed pact that they made off-screen. I have to assume that Veronika went to Hu pretty quickly to reveal her secret to her given her general disinterest in topics of suicide and self harm. So I'd wager this pact was probably made at around CH2-5. Not that that really tells us much about the actual conversation, but it's nice to have a time-frame for reference.

I don't expect the actual conversation to be shown because from what we currently have it doesn't really add much of anything, but it would definitely be cool.

(x) Hu: I've been quite selfish this whole time, keeping my secret because I didn't want you all to think less of me...

I've said this before in this post, but I absolutely believe that David eventually coaxed and pressured Hu into revealing her secret to him, as well as why she kept it for so long. And I also think David implanted, or I guess more accurately watered the seed in Hu's head that she was inherently selfish for not sharing her secret. That, I think we would benefit from a flashback, but maybe I'm just biased because I desperately want Hu lore. Please DT-Dev, I'm on my knees Hmm... what else?

(x) Veronika: After all, my own so-called secret isn't even the worst thing I've done. Isn't that so utterly disappointing for this motive?

Oh yeah there's that. What the fuck, Veronika? Like, I feel like this is something I should've expected this, but for some reason I didn't. I'll be honest here, I really have nothing right now. But whatever Veronika is referring to here, I feel like it has something to do with her 'dearest friend' mentioned in the CH2 Q&A (who's name is Alyssa Belyaeva.) What Veronika actually did? I do not have the slightest clue, you can never know with this girl. But no matter what she did, I will probably love her even more for it. Glad that DT-Dev seems to agree with the precedence of supporting women's wrongs.

Teruko

...So I'm glad to see we're all in agreement that that is not her fucking secret. I mean, I'm sure it applies to her. She is an orphan, her parents are out of the picture, and though we don't know the whereabouts of her brother and neither does she, she most likely assumes he's dead as well. But honestly, given the fact that again this is not her fucking secret, I'm starting to wonder if that's really the case... Can Teacher Tawaki theory still live on? I'll save that for another post.

Anyway what was I talking about? Oh yeah, that is not her fucking secret.

And this little bitch knows that for a fact.

I won't go too deep into this because there have already been people discussing it better than I could, but this silent agreement the two of them have to not share Teruko's true secret is so palpable and interesting to me. David knows that Teruko's secret isn't that, but for whatever reason, he is keeping his mouth shut. And he just gives Teruko that shit-eating smirk. Have I ever mentioned how much I love Teruvid? I fucking love Teruvid. But yeah, I still think 100% that Teruko's secret is that the killing game is all her fault. It just does not make sense for Xander and Min's secrets to belong to anyone other than each other as they are dead. And in general it just makes sense for Teruko's character and her role in the story. And I can't help but feel like Teruko's actual secret will be revealed at the end of the Chapter.

Eden

... I mean. Do I really need to say more? I swear I made this exact joke in the previous thoughts post, but I can't help it. It applies perfectly to this CG. When this CG, this fucking JUMPSCARE of a CG, popped up on my screen, I'm pretty sure I ran around in a circle screaming in my room for a total of ten minutes. The first of two times I would do that during this masterfully crafted scene. I want to think of some kind of insightful analysis, but the truth is basically in your face. Eden was the one who gouged out Xander's eye. Why did she do it? Where does this fit into the overall lore? I DON'T FUCKING KNOW What the fuck am I supposed to say? This CG is basically all we have, and we'll definitely have to wait for more information. Especially since Eden is totally the culprit, but we'll get to that in the predictions section. (yeah if you can't tell my writing juice is starting to run out, but if I get this out any later than today I will kill myself)

David

(...for a scumbag, he's kinda cute.) So first of all, David is slowly becoming the funniest character in the cast in my opinion, which is a huge achievement in a cast full of very funny characters. And in general I think as a character he perfectly captures DRDT's general tone of half-and-half both silliness and angst, like yin and yang. Secondly though, the big thing that David did in this chapter (besides keeping Teruko's secret and being funny) is lying to Eden about the rest of the conversation he had with Arei. Ultimately, I think David himself saw that action as a good deed.

Think of it from his perspective: This is a man who has had hope and change presented to him on a silver platter multiple times, and then had it violently ripped away from him. And the most recent example of that, Arei, presented him with a better future and the possibility of change only to be killed upon trying to act on said change. If he told Eden that Arei still had hope, that she still wanted to change, it would aspire Eden with that same hope that in his eyes is destined to crash down on her. So instead of inflicting that same pain onto her, he instead chose to say nothing at all Maybe I'm giving David too much credit, what he did was still at the end of the day, incredibly dickish. But that interpretation is what makes the most sense to me personally. That's all I really have to say in regards to David... So, let's move onto what was, in my opinion, the star of this week's episode.

Arei

Arei Nageishi.... Ohhhh save me Arei Nageishi.... Arei was already one of my favorite characters in the cast due to her personality, design, voice acting, and most of all the character development she had throughout the course of Chapter 2. But this episode, this scene... It cemented her a well-earned spot in my top four, sitting only behind Whit, Teruko, and David.

The flashback scene of Arei and David in this episode is honestly up there with some of the best scenes in the whole show to me, almost solely because of how it caps off Arei as a character postmortem, and the story that she, along with Chapter 2 as a whole, is meant to tell. This whole chapter has been themed around the idea of what classifies a good person, and this flashback scene provides such a great payoff to that theme and it is everything I could've ever wished for. The message I got from Arei's story is that, ultimately, the idea of a "Good Person" and a "Bad Person" are nothing more than just that. Ideas. And in being ideas, they are above anything else, arbitrary, subjective, and at the end of the day, incredibly meaningless when it comes to discussing actual human beings. Insistence on categorizing yourself and the people around you into boxes of "pure saint that can do no wrong" and "irredeemable demon who will burn in the pits of hell" is a fast track to viewing a complicated, colorful world into a few shades of black and white. That's how David views the world, and has viewed the world probably for years. And I'm going to be honest and say that I think before being confronted with the truth of David's actions, Arei was heading right down the same path that he had headed.

(x) Arei: Of course I wanted to change myself. Who wants to be a grab-bag of negative personality traits? There's not even anything positive you could say about me. Arei: Still, for the longest time, I thought it was stupid to even try. I'm rotten to the core, and I might as well be a different species from saints like Eden and you. Arei: A pig never hopes to grow up into a human, because it knows that such a metamorphosis is impossible.

And this is the line that really, really makes me think that. She calls David and Eden saints because (up until this moment) she viewed both of them as the ideal of what makes a good person, similar to how David views Xander. And on the contrast, claims herself to be rotten to the core, ontologically evil with no redemption in sight. She's even performing David's habit of self-dehumanization, likening herself to a pig in the same way David likens himself to a cat in the LGI video, which goes to show how this mindset of black-and-white is, above all else, a dehumanizing view on the human race that relegates people into cardboard boxes with the flaps taped shut. If she didn't find out the truth of David's actions, I am confident that she would've done down the same path that he did, becoming convinced that she will be a terrible person until the day she dies because she cannot reach this worthless standard of a good person that she has set up in her head. But we know that's not how it goes. Arei does realize that the man she once thought of as a saint might be, in his words, a lying manipulative scumbaggy piece of shit. And upon realizing that, the second half of the message unlocks itself. There is no such thing as irredeemability.

Change is a part of being human. Humans are not built to run in a hamster wheel for the rest of their days, reliving their mistakes over and over again wallowing in their self-hatred and guilt. Eventually, they have to get off the wheel and start taking the steps necessary to grow, change, develop and flourish to properly better themselves. (This applies to yourself just as much as it applies to the worst, most depraved individual you know by the way) The alternative is living in a four-by-four black box of self-loathing and relentless stagnancy, which is not productive for the person or the people they've hurt. It is only when you reject these black-and-white categories of "Good Person" and "Bad Person" and accept that no matter what you've done, you're capable of becoming better, that you can achieve true growth and change. The way this message was executed, especially through a character that dies before the halfway point of the story, is something that I marvel at as an aspiring storyteller. DRDT's beating heart will always be its character writing, and this scene is one of the primary examples of that. Thank you, DT-Dev, for making Arei Nageishi and the rest of your amazing cast of characters. :D

Extra Thoughts !!! - FURUYA FANDOM (me) THE TRACK PLAYED LETS FUCKING GOOOOOO!!! - I am very excited to find out more about Nico's attempted murder given all of the questions surrounding it. If the method of murder really was replicated, and Nico wasn't the culprit themself, you guys should take a wild guess who that implicates. (this is probably obvious by this point, but I really don't believe in the theories that suggest that someone other than Nico was responsible for Ace's attempted demise, be it Hu or Ace himself. I feel like it doesn't line up with the current narrative direction that Nico seems to be going in, the physical evidence of them stealing the turpentine, and...I'm gonna be honest, I just don't like it lmao. I'm sure DT-Dev would do it well, but just as a premise I do not favor it. Nico's attempted murder + subsequent regret from it felt like such a big moment in the chapter's narrative in relation to the themes of All That Glitters and the cast revealing sides to themself that weren't as prevalent before, as well as the themes of change and moving on from the past littered all throughout the chapter. I think if Nico's attempted murder was responsible by anyone but Nico, it would just dampen the impact of their overall story for me. That's just me though.) - WE FINALLY GOT ANOTHER NONSTOP DEBATE LETS GO BOYS!!! Nonstop debates I MISSED you - "Hey why does Whit know so much about hangi--" Look. This man is so unbelievably suspicious in every single way that for the sake of my sanity, I'm just gonna assume DT-Dev chose a random character to give the hanging explanation. It is the only way I will survive this chapter - But hey, at least we got this

- As always, I adore the new sprites we got this episode, especially Ace's new ones. It's probably the first sprite of his that actually appears emotionally vulnerable when he's not bleeding profusely from the neck. And of course, I loved David's shit-eating grin towards Teruko, I hope he never changes. - Speaking of Teruko, us getting Tutor Teruko was lovely. She is perfect, she is a little bit of everything all of the time.

(x) Whit: If you're so inclined to complain, Sir Light Pollution, why don't you try and think of some good evidence? Charles: Light pollution? Whit: You know… Cuz he had stars, and now he doesn't, and light pollution makes stars disappear… or… or… something….. Charles: I am truly impressed…by how bad that was.

- I love these dorks so much. I can tell DT-Dev has a lot of fun writing them.

- Teronika Consent animation! I guess after Acevi's Soap Opera, DT-Dev decided to feed the yuri crowd as well. Love it when we get to see those little sprite animations, too.

Predictions for CH2-14 - The episode is 40 minutes long, the longest episode we have had so far. (40 minutes of DRDT content... I'm excited just thinking about it!) Because of that, I think I will just start with my biggest prediction: I think we're getting the culprit reveal this chapter. I don't think that just because of the length either. When you really look at it, we have basically used every piece of evidence at least once with the exception of three: - The conditions of the gym (which I assume will be discussed next) - The scuffs on the ground - The ball of starchy clothes All three of those pieces of evidence I think can definitely be cleared up in the span of 40 minutes, especially since full focus is now on the murder case. I don't necessarily think the trial will end in this episode, but I think we have at least one more trial episode to go before the post-trial + execution + ending of the chapter. - And as the culprit reveal is approaching, I have formulated a tier list of who I think is least - most likely to be Arei's culprit. I will provide my reasoning for each.

No. 17/16 - Xander Matthews + Min Jeung I mean, what it says on the tin. They're dead, and thus couldn't had committed the murder. No. 15/14 - MonoTV + Arei Nageishi There are explicit rules against them being the culprit. Rule 8 and Rule 11 in particular. No. 13 - Teruko Tawaki She is the protagonist. Didn't stop Kaede, but I highly doubt that's where DT-Dev is going. No. 12 - David Chiem Other than the previous five who I've all disqualified from being the culprit, David is probably the character I suspect the least. He has an alibi for the time of the murder, getting breakfast with J and Veronika, and thematically...well, he's basically being set up as the antagonist. I don't think we'll be rid of him this early lmao. No. 11 - Charles Cuevas Charles has a fear of blood and dead bodies, and though I wouldn't say that completely disqualifies him from becoming a culprit in the future, in a case like this with such a complicated mechanism like this where he'd have to be in very close proximity with the body at all times? I highly doubt it. He also has an alibi for the fish (He was with Whit). No. 10 - J Rosales J both has an alibi for the fish (Arturo following her around), and an alibi for the morning (getting breakfast with David and Veronika), and both of those alibis can be confirmed. I don't think she did this. No. 9 - Veronika Grebenshchikova I'll be honest, I really don't see Veronika committing a murder at all. She clearly wants to see this through to the end, and killing someone would come with the risk of her being executed, which I don't think she would see as a satisfying conclusion to her story. That, combined with the fact that she has an alibi for the fish (bothering Teruko) and an alibi for the murder (getting breakfast with David and J) makes me think she didn't do this. No. 8 - Nico Hakobyan You might think it's weird to place Nico this low on the overall tier-list despite them not having an alibi for the fishes, and their morning alibi being...somewhat flimsy but I'll get to that with Hu, but here's my logic. Nico was driven to attempt murder from very specific circumstances. That being, Ace's relentless bullying and abuse towards them. Nico has said before that they'd understand murder if the perpetrator didn't like the victim, and while I don't think they exactly liked Arei, I do not think they harbor the same animosity towards her as they did towards Ace. I truly believe that Nico would only ever resort to murder if they truly despised the person in question and saw no other solution. So that is why I feel comfortable placing Nico at eighth. No. 7 - Hu Jing Hu is also another character that I think some will be surprised to see so low, but I don't think this was her doing. She has an alibi for the fish (cleaning up with Eden), and though again her alibi in the morning is very flimsy (having tea with Nico in the morning,) I do believe she is telling the truth because if she was lying about her alibi, I think the brutally blunt Nico would call her out for it. I'm sorry, I just simply cannot imagine Nico letting that shit slide regardless of how many theories I read. Not to mention I can't really think of a motive for why she would kill Arei specifically when, if she really did want to kill someone, Ace is right there. No. 6 - Whit Young Whit is supremely fucking suspicious and a lot of his behavior in the trial is literal shenanigans, even more so given the fact that he doesn't have an alibi for the actual murder. But he does have an alibi for the fish (again, he was with Charles) which is the main sticking point of Whit!Culprit. His other sticking point is his lack of motive, both in terms of the secrets and Arei specifically. I don't know like- just look at this man, do you think he did this? /joke

No. 5 - Levi Fontana The number one suspect in the fandom for a while, and he's only at number five. He ultimately lacks an alibi for the morning, and his alibi for the fish was that he was doing his laundry... With no one else around. Shady as fuck. But I think given his principles discussed in this episode ("it is a good thing to make sure someone else doesn't die"), and the genuine desire to be helpful he has expressed throughout this trial, I think him being the culprit is unlikely. That's why I was adamant on him being an accomplice for a while because I still thought he had some role in the case, but oh well. No. 4 - Rose Lacroix I'll be honest, Rose is only this high because her alibi situation is worse than Whit's and Levi's combined. Both of her alibis are that she was sleeping in her room, which cannot be proven and can be very easily lied about. But other than that, I don't think she is the culprit. I think this case requires too many physical maneuvers for someone as lethargic as Rose to pull off successfully, and if she were the culprit I don't think she'd bring attention to the missing grippy tape at all. No. 3 - Arturo Giles Arturo does have an alibi for the fish (following J), but does not have an alibi for the morning. Unlike basically every other character here, something else that puts Arturo above them is that he was capable of overhearing Eden and Arei's conversation and forging the note. But there is also a discrepancy present that is also present with every character here, and that is the fact that Arturo did not witness Nico's attempted murder or the condition of Ace's body and the gym, so there was no way he could've replicated the murder method used for Ace on Arei. So though logistically he is a more likely possibility, I don't think it was him. No. 2 - Ace Markey Ace, to me anyway, is the second most likely candidate to being Arei's killer. He does not have an alibi for the fish and could've very easily grabbed them after David and Arei left the Relaxation Room, and he doesn't have an alibi for the morning either. He has a very clear motivation for taking a chance at killing someone, of "someone literally sliced my neck open not two days ago and I know I am not safe here I need to get the fuck out." If you choose to factor in strength, Ace is one of the strongest members of the cast and would be more than capable of the physical maneuvers made to kill Arei. Though I personally don't believe in this theory, if you think Ace attempted suicide instead of Nico trying to kill him, he has the murder method down lock too because he tried to commit it onto himself. He has been shown to be nosy, so it is not improbable that he listened in on Arei and Eden's conversation. And lastly, he is one of the only two suspects who was capable of stealing the grippy tape that was used in the murder. All of the evidence is practically stacked against him... But there are a couple of problems. One, if you believe that Nico did try to kill Ace, than the point about Ace knowing the exact method of death goes out the window. He was knocked out by the turpentine, and woke up in extreme pain in a blinding fury of rage and bloodlust, I don't think his surroundings would be the first thing on his mind. But a much bigger issue we have is the question of... Why would Ace take the tape? Following this theory, his murder plan wouldn't had started until the day after Nico's attempt on his life, it would make no sense for him to take the tape then. These two sticking points are why, though a likely candidate, I do not think Ace is the culprit. That award of main suspect goes to...

No. 1 - Eden Tobisa Yeah, if you've spent any time on this account you probably know I'm an Eden!Culprit truther. There are many well-written posts about this theory that I'm sure you've seen so I'll try to keep this short, but though the theory does have a few flaws to it, the big one being Eden's alibi for the fish that she was cleaning up with Hu, I think Eden being the culprit makes the most sense from an evidence, thematic, and motive standpoint. I know some people have dropped the theory upon the fork reveal, but DRDT is not unbeknownst to killing off characters with certain mysteries left unanswered. That is basically all for my predictions related to the culprit, but I still have some predictions for the overall episode. - Nico's gonna get placed in the hot-seat, obviously, which will definitely cause a reaction out of both Hu and Ace. And I honestly feel like the two of them are going to keep interrupting Nico until they eventually snap. And I hope that happens honestly because unless you count the "I'll kill you" line, we have yet to see or hear Nico when they're actually angry angry. Nico obviously doesn't like conflict, but they might have to get over that if they actually want to defend themself knowing the other two. - I'm still holding out hope we'll get a Random Guess segment lmao - And lastly: I need Whit to break the forth wall at least once I didn't put that on the bingo card for fucking NOTHING

Conclusion I'm gonna be completely honest, I do not have the energy to write anymore and I just want this out lmao. But overall, this was one of my favorite episodes in the whole series. I loved the Levi and Ace stuff, I like that we now have all the secrets, and like I said, the scene with Arei is probably one of my favorite scenes in the show. CH2-14 is going to be a wild ride I can already tell, and if we do find out who the killer is, you will see me screaming. Regardless of if it's Eden lmao.

UPDATED SWEAR STATISTICS CH2-13

UPDATED BINGO CARD

#finally....finally its done...haha...ITS FINALLY DONE!!! /ref #desperately hoping at least one of you gets where that's from #this took way longer than it needed to because I have been in a creativity rut this last week and it has been fucking my ass #that and there was so much to discuss with this episode compared to the last one #but its done. hopefully ch2-14 post wont take me too long #hopefully #danganronpa despair time #drdt

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tonyspank · 1 year

Text

HEART

Warnings: Swearing, Frankie, bad writing and a taser?

A/N: Currently writing the next chapter for The Party & The After Party, also this could be read as GN! , there's a few mentions that you're a female tho

Words: 2.7k

Tara Carpenter x Female! Reader

Being Chad Meek's best friend had a lot of benefits. Including, knowing when a party was happening. This is exactly how you found yourself at this house party, dressed up as Spider-Man.

You knew Chad from your football team, he was your quarterback and you were the first female wide receiver to ever play in Blackmore University or the NCAA division in general.

Due to that everyone knew who you were, but you didn't care about the fame or the popularity, you just wanted to enjoy college and get to play football alongside your best friend.

There had been times when people would try to befriend or even date you for your name instead of your actual personality, and it made it hard for you to truly make friends or fall for someone.

Your trust issues began when your ex-girlfriend cheated on you with Frankie. She was the first person (other than Chad) to introduce herself to you and show you around campus.

The two of you started dating about three months after your friendship, and something always felt a little off. It felt as if you were on the same page but on different levels. You wanted to stay out and watch stupid thriller movies and cuddle on the couch while she wanted to go out to parties and show you off anytime she could.

You and Kayla did have a couple of things in common, you got along well, but if anything it was intuitively that you were more like friends or whatever. Sure, you guys were intimate but it still didn't feel right, you were never in love.

And you surely knew she didn't love you.

Especially, after seeing her under Frankie in your own dorm room.

Yeah, that was very disrespectful.

She then proceeded to tell you that she never liked you and only used you for Instagram followers and more friends. Yes, it hurt. But it was better to have her out of your life than to be living with a lie.

After your breakup with Kayla, you thought you'd be sad, but in reality, it just opened up your eyes a bit more. You felt more at ease.

"What's wrong with my sweatpants?" You ask, your voice slightly muffled through the Spider-Man masking over your face.

"I'm telling you I've never seen Spider-Man wear sweatpants," Chad tells you, taking a sip of his drink. You playfully roll your eyes looking over to Ethan for his help, noticing he speaks up.

"Actually, he does in the Miles Morales Spider-Man and Andrew Garfield's Spider-Man did behind the scenes."

"But none of that is live action," Chad argues his case causing you to let out a sigh.

"Regardless of how uncanon my Spider-sweats are." Chad furrows his eyebrows shaking his head as you continue, "I still have the best costume here."

"I think Ethan's outfit is pretty cute," Chad says, motioning to Ethan who smiles in response. You jokingly pinch the curly-haired boys' cheeks, "Yeah, but Ethan's just cute in general."

Ethan slaps away your hand while Chad shrugs nodding in agreement. "I'm going to go bother the lovebirds!" You quickly announce, patting Chad's shoulder before leaving.

You make your way through drunk college students and sweaty bodies before noticing Mindy and Anika cuddled up on the couch, walking over you softly push them apart, sitting right between them.

Mindy sends you a playfully fake smile leaning in close to whisper, "I'm going to fucking beat your ass after this party." She fake laughs afterwards noticing that Anika is watching. You fake laugh as well, but side-eye Mindy in slight fear which she can't see due to the Spider-Man covering your face.

Anika is about to say something but her eyes wander off, worry filling her face. Both you and Mindy follow her view, and you notice a female pirate walking alongside Frankie.

You clench your jaw as Anika voices her worries, "Ohhh, I don't love that." Mindy hums in agreement, Anika quickly gets up, softly grabbing the pirate's arm. She turns around with a smile listening to her friend. "Hey, wanna call it a night?"

The smile is still prominent on her face she looks around before answering, "No, uh. I actually think that I'm still going to hang, but you guys don't have to wait for me."

Frankie speaks up with a smirk on his face, "Don't worry. I'll take care of her, I'm Frankie."

Anika shakes her head, "And I'm spectacularly uninterested in knowing anything about you." Frankie scoffs in response while the female Captain Hook laughs, leaning in as she lowers her voice. "No, dude. Anika, I'm not that bad."

She takes a few steps back, slightly walking away. "But I appreciate you looking out for me." Frankie sends Anika a cocky smile before following the dark-haired girl.

You decide now is the time to step in, "I'm going to go help her." Mindy nods her head, sitting up on the couch as you walk over to Anika.

"I'll follow her. You get Chad." You instruct, Anika mumbles, "Okay." And you both walk off in different directions.

"Aren't you that girl involved in that 'Stab' shit in California last year?" You hear Frankie as, she lets out a chuckle, "No. That's a different pirate."

Standing at the end of the steps you speak up, "Frankie! Hey, why don't we keep the party down here? I'd hate to miss out."

Frankie and the pirate turn around at your voice, and you feel Chad beside you. "I think we're good Y/L/N." He replies, recognizing your voice through the mask.

"Well, Tara's good down here." Chad joins in, and immediately Frankie responds. "I'm sorry. I didn't catch that."

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, you did." Chad remarks, trying his best to stay calm. Tara walks down a couple of steps, standing in front of you and Chad. "No, Chad it's fine. I want to."

Frankie walks down too, getting close to Chad's face. "Yeah, see Chad? It's fine she wants to." He turns back around but not before roughly grabbing Tara by her arm, she lets out an, "Ow." and you swiftly grab Frankie by his shirt, pulling him down the stairs.

"Don't fucking grab her like that." You push him away into the wall and a crowd suddenly appears, you don't notice Chad checking on Tara as you're focused on the Frat boy in front of you.

He pushes you back, "Get the fuck off me!" Tara removes herself from Chad's grip walking behind you and gripping your Spider-suit as much as she can, using all of her drunken strength to pull you away from Frankie. "Guys! Guys stop."

Chad angrily steps in, grabbing Frankie by his shirt, and pushing him onto the ground. And as you're being pulled away by Tara, Mindy walks in waving a hand basically telling you to go help Chad.

You glance at Chad then Tara who's shocked at the sight going on in front of you, then at Mindy. You knew Chad could handle himself for a couple of seconds until you got the drunk pirate out of the situation before she hurt herself trying to split up another fight.

"Excuse me!" You shout at the crowd, nearly everyone steps out of your way as you slightly and as softly as you can pull Tara away. Your heart drops when someone suddenly appears in front of you, "Hi! Sorry to interrupt, I'm just going to tase you really quick." Before you could plead your case, you feel a sharp pain in your stomach causing you to drop to your knees.

"Fuck!" You yell out, slapping your hand against the wooden floor. It felt like every muscle in your stomach had a Charlie horse, and you couldn't help but stay curled up on the ground even while Mindy rushed to your side, alongside Tara asking you if you were okay.

Chad was also there too, with a bloody nose. He takes off your mask, showing everyone your squinted eyes, furrowed eyebrows, and your parted lips.

Sam stands there, confused and guilty. Did she tase the wrong person?

"Sam! You tased the wrong person!" Mindy shouts at her. Oh. She did tase the wrong person.

You roll over onto your back, your hands on top of your stomach and you sit up. The group is silent, waiting for your reaction. "Fuck... that really hurt." You mumble, letting out a small laugh after.

Chad smiles, confused but begins laughing with you and everyone soon joins in, helping you up from the ground. As Chad and Mindy both have your arm making sure you were okay Sam walks up, and her face is filled with guilt.

"Holy shit! It's that psycho girl!" Someone yells out from the crowd. Sam sends a slight glare before turning her head back toward you.

"Shit. I am so sorry. I didn't mean to—" You cut her off with a wave, "It's okay." You then tell the twins you're okay, and they reluctantly let you go.

You look around looking for Frankie who definitely deserved the thirty seconds of pain you went through. Noticing he's gone you now focus on Chad, who whips his nose with a smirk on his face.

"I won the fight." He informs you with a jolly smile on his face.

Tara storms in front of the group, in embarrassment and anger at her sister.

"Tara! Will you stop!" Tara doesn't stop but only slightly turns her head to speak to her sister. "I cannot believe you did that, you embarrassed me!" Tara faces the front again, continuing her struts.

"I was trying to help you!" Tara turns around, upset if it wasn't obvious before. "And look what happened!" She raises her voice, motioning to you. Your face heats up in embarrassment, as you scratch your nose.

"You're out of my life for five years then you can't even leave me alone for five seconds!" She shouts, throwing her arms up.

"Because you're not dealing with what happened to us. Have you ever gone to see the counsellor at least once?" You look around the group, seeing Mindy let out a sigh watching the scene unfold in front of her.

"No, and I'm not going to." Sam shakes her head, "Why not!"

"Because I'm uninterested in living in the past like you are." Sam furrows her eyebrows, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Chad then takes in a deep breath, tired of the back and forth between the two siblings. "Hey, guys, come on—" He's unheard or ignored as Tara continues. "It means I'm not gonna let what happen to us for three days define the rest of my life!"

"So you're just going to pretend it never happened?" Tara closes her eyes, trying to calm down, and when she reopens them her tone is softer than before.

"What are you doing here Sam? In New York." Sam scoffs, as Tara continues. "I mean y-you're working two shitty jobs to help with.. rent, whatever, but what's your plan?" She stumbles a bit on her words, and you think it's due to the alcohol in her system.

Sam slightly shakes her head, not knowing what to say as Tara proceeds with her point. "I know what I'm going to do. Okay? Because I'm going to keep going to college, I'm going to get my degree, and I'm gonna live my life."

You twist your lips and shift your weight from one foot to another.

"My life," Tara says, slapping her hand against her chest. "That I know." Sam eyes her sister with a slight furrow in her eyebrows. "You just follow me here and you won't let me out of your sight."

"Just trying to look out for you." Tara speaks up, "I—" but cuts herself off, letting out a sigh as she runs her hands down her face. "I know. I know you are."

"You can't do it for the rest of my life though, you have to let me go." There are footsteps heard coming up, Tara turns her head and before anyone could react or say something, Sam is getting a drink splashed onto her.

The girl yells out, "Murderer!" as her one of friends records. Sam gives the girl a shove causing her to slightly stumble back, quickly Chad and you hold Sam back not wanting her to do anything rash. "Fuck is wrong with you, bitch!"

The girl points at Sam, "You guys should stay away from her. She knows what she did!" Sam pushes Chad away, and Tara joins in with you trying to hold back her surprisingly strong sister. "I didn't fucking do anything!"

"Sure, bitch." The girl says, walking away backwards with her friends.

As the group walks away you stand back waiting for Sam as she rings out her shirt, Ethan takes notice of this, walking back and offering her tissues. She eyes the boy before taking the tissues out of his hand. Ethan walks off once Sam looks at him.

You walk to Sam, offering her your Spider-Man mask, "Uh, it's not a tissue but I'm sure it'll help?" She shakes her head waving it off.

"Also, um. I'm Y/N, and for what it's worth I think you're a good sister for trying." She stares at you a bit before nodding, and you begin walking away following the group.

Before you know it you're standing in the middle of the Carpenter-Bailey's living room, awkwardly. Chad is settling down, taking off his jacket and hat and putting on a t-shirt.

Sam, Tara, and Quinn were all in their selected rooms as the rest of you were in the living room.

"Chad?" He hums in response turning around to face you, "I think I'm going to leave."

"Oh, okay. Need me to walk you home?" He genuinely asks, you shake your head. "Nah, it's fine. Tell Tara and Sam it was nice to meet them."

You wave goodbye to Mindy and Anika who are sitting on the couch in front of you before exiting the apartment.

Moments pass and Tara's back in the living room, looking around. "What are you looking for?" Mindy laughs confused, Tara looked like a lost puppy as she searched around the small apartment.

"Where'd she go?" The two girls and Chad furrow their eyebrows. "Who?" Anika asks.

"Uh, Chad's friend." She utters, embarrassed. Mindy immediately noticed how pink Tara's cheeks were and the paper in her hand. Mindy shoots up from the couch, "What's that?"

Tara's eyes move to Mindy's view, she quickly pockets the folded note. "Nothing! I just felt bad that Sam tased the fuck out of them when they wanted to help me."

Mindy turns her head at Anika and Chad, raising her eyebrows and they instantly get the message. Tara thinks you're cute, and that note would confirm it. "Oh!" Chad says, standing up from his chair. "I could always give it to her."

Tara's eyes leave Mindy and go to Chad, "Really?" She says hopefully, "You wouldn't read it right?"

Quickly he shakes his head, "No. No. No! Of, course not!" He holds out his hand so Tara can give him the note, and she does. Anika watches this from the couch, but her jaw drops when she sees Mindy's hand snatch the note and runs to her with it.

"Mindy!" Tara shouts, trying to run after her but Chad grabs her, and all Tara can do is watch Mindy open her note in, reading it out loud.

"hi! this is tara, the pirate from the party. sorry that we had to meet on such terms, please let me make it up to you, from tara. HEART!" Mindy reads, shouting the last bit.

Chad lets Tara go with a shocked face, and Tara covers her own face in embarrassment.

Everyone's head turns to the door, noticing you standing there. "Hi..." You awkwardly, mumble out. "I forgot my mask." You tell them, pointing at it beside Anika on the couch.

Mindy looks at the mask, then at you. "How long have you been here?"

"Um.." You scratch your eyebrow. "Long enough to accept Tara's proposal." You laugh, with a cheeky smile.

Tara smiles widely, her face nearly as red as a tomato.

#reader insert #jenna ortega x reader #wattpad #jenna ortega #tara carpenter #tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x y/n #tara carpenter x you #scream #scream 6 #tara carpenter x fem reader #jenna marie ortega

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bradtomlovesya · 2 years

Text

Choices. 1

One: It Has Always Been Her

Peter Parker x reader series

Summary: Everybody forgot who Peter Parker was. All his world tunerd grey until he met you and you started dating. It could have been perfect if it wasn't for the fact that MJ comes back and, surprise! She remembers EVERYTHING.

Warnings: Pure Angst!, some descriptions of sex (+18), swearing, mentions of death.

w/c: 4.2k +

a/n: First chapter of this series. I hope you enjoy it and by "enjoyt it" I mean, cry with me, lol. Likes, reblogs and comments are much appreciate it as always. If you want to be added to my permanent tags there's a link on my masterlist and if you just want to be added for this series tag list you can leave a comment. Gif not mine

Series Masterlist

"Can I come in?" he asks with his hands in his pockets.

"I don't think that's a good idea" you deny. Your voice comes out in what is little more than a whisper.

"Y/n... please, I just want to talk" he pleads. His gaze is as pleading as a puppy's when he sees that you only have one bite left and you haven't given him any yet.

"I think I need time" you say without looking at him.

~How did I get to this place?~, you wonder. ~How did it all end up so fucked up?~

Maybe we should rewind it so we can understand.

—---------------|°|-------------------

- 8 months earlier -

Second semester of college. You're a nervous wreck, how will your classes be this semester, will you be able to understand everything you need to?

Anxiety invading your body like thousands of electric currents flowing through you. You can calm them, but you can't get rid of them. They are part of you, your anxiety is just trying to keep you safe after all.

You look at the small piece of paper in your hands, it's the only thing you had on hand at the time to write down the room number of your classes after asking the secretary. Of course it was more of a scribble than anything else. The lady was in a hurry, after all.

"Excuse me" you walk up to what appears to be your classroom and there is nothing but a boy sitting in the back. "Sorry, sorry to bother you" you bite your lip, the boy looks up somewhat sheepishly and watches you. "Is this Mr. Anderson's class?" you ask at last.

"You're in the right place" he nods with the warmest, friendliest smile you've ever seen.

Slowly the room begins to fill up, you try to make your way through but fail miserably. It's a buffalo onslaught and you're just a little bunny. The chairs fill up, there aren't many empty seats.

Your eyes meet his again, he's watching you. He tries to tell you something and that's when you see him point to his backpack on the chair next to him. He's saving you a seat.

Your heart slows down, all means you already have a place to sit.

You walk over to him and carefully sit down as he removes his backpack.

"I appreciate it very much, you saved my education" you try to break the ice the only way you know how, by making a little joke.

Luckily his sense of humor is just as strange and you manage to get a chuckle out of him.

"I'm glad I did..." he pauses, waiting for you to tell him your name.

"Y/n, I'm Y/n Y/l/n" you extend your hand in greeting and he takes it without hesitation.

"Peter Parker" The smile never leaves his mouth.

Deep down inside you know you should have met him.... You were never one to believe in coincidences, but you did believe in fate.

Even if this could be your place of peace and your downfall at the same time.

- 7 months earlier -

"You can't tell me you've never seen the star wars movies" Peter denies, a rebellious curl decides down his forehead and distracts you for a second.

That thing he told you about him not being popular at school was hard to believe. Peter was the most interesting, kind, simple, honest and tender person you've ever met. Not to mention that his little freckles, deep-set eyes, chocolate hair and Greek God body made it even more difficult to believe.

You knew he'd had a girlfriend. However, Peter always avoided the subject. He would say that he had broken up with her because they would go to different colleges but only that. You knew it wasn't a subject you should bring up, not if you didn't want Peter's mood to change at the drop of a hat. Not in a bad way, just like his energy would suddenly go out.

"Well you can show them to me now, can't you?" you bite the end of your pen. You were supposed to be 'studying'. To be honest, it was hard for you to concentrate when he was looking at you with that cute smile.

"I think so..." He nods slightly. "Surely you don't want to keep studying?"

"Pretty sure, that's not the only reason I invited you over" You avoid his gaze and a pink tint covers your cheeks. You're embarrassed and Peter knows it. He can hear your heartbeat racing. That would matter to him if it weren't for the fact that his is the same.

"Then let's watch the first movie" He nods. "I like spending time with you."

Your heart melted... Oh, if only you'd left it in the freezer.

- 6 months earlier -

You found out Peter was spiderman by accident, you didn't mean to and neither did he.

You were in his apartment because you had decided you had had enough of hiding your feelings. You liked Peter, a lot. You couldn't go on with the uncertainty anymore, you really hoped he would like you back.

You had the keys to his apartment, you lived in the dorms and your roommate wasn't very quiet, let alone calm, so Peter offered you his apartment to study in during exam season. However, you decided to use the small advantage to prepare something nice for him, something you could confess to.

You prepared a dinner for both of you and put on that skirt that Peter once said he liked because it brought out the color of your eyes.

Everything was ready and would have been perfect had it not been for Peter aka Spiderman. He decided to go out patrolling the neighborhood that night and found himself engaged in a battle that left him breathless. He came out victorious, but more tired than usual, his senses were not very sharp and he allowed himself to enter through the window of his room and remove his mask without realizing that you were already there. Sitting on his bed waiting for him.

"Peter?" you murmur petrified. You definitely weren't expecting this, let alone him.

"Y-Yn? W-What are you doing h-here?" he looks you up and down and stutters. You don't know how to explain it but you still try "I can explain" You look at the mask in his hand.

"You're spiderman" Your gaze is lost. You try to get back to the here and now.

"No!" He exclaims but denies right after. "I mean, yes but-" He's even more nervous than you are.

He didn't want you to know. Having the important people in his life know that he was spiderman brought him nothing but trouble.

More importantly, he didn't want to put you in danger. You, the only good thing he had achieved after all the bad things that had happened exactly 8 months ago.

"Oh wow..." You stand up and your eyes search his. "That explains why you were disappearing without saying where you were going" you sigh in relief "I thought you had a girlfriend I didn't know about or something... this is totally a relief."

"A relief?" now he's the one who's confused. "So bad it was that I had a girlfriend"

"Maybe... a little" you shrug. You came here to be honest and that's what you're trying. Even after the bombshell of information you just got, that doesn't change anything, the reason you came is the same.

"It's good that you're not scared but what are you doing here? As far as I know we didn't arrange to meet, did we?"

"Now the surprise was for both of us" You joke to lighten the mood.

"You're not wrong there" he laughs lightly. "What kind of surprise?" He looks at the pair of candles around you.

"One where I tell you I like you, Peter" you say bravely. You feel proud that you could do it even though your palms are shaking.

"And after this?" His eyes don't leave yours. His heart is beating a mile a minute, he couldn't believe you felt the same way he did even though he was worried about what might happen after you discovered his other side.

"You being Spiderman doesn't change my feelings for you, Peter. I like you and spiderman won't make it any different" You smile at how crazy that sounded. The guy you like is spiderman.

"I like you too" his smile widens and he takes a step towards you.

"Really?" you ask incredulously.

"Totally" he nods and you place your arms around his neck.

You don't know what to say so you choose to do. You move your face and kiss his lips. You really hope he reciprocates and, apparently, your pleas have been heard because he does reciprocate.

Your first kiss, the first of many punishments.

- 5 months earlier -

You know Peter is not someone who opens up easily, actually. You think you're his only friend (now more than friend) at this university.

When he's not with you, he's on patrol, attending his classes or doing homework in the library, which he usually does with you as well.

You are both excellent study partners. Peter, besides being your boyfriend, is your best friend and teacher. He is your person and you are sure that you are his.

However, you were surprised when you asked him why he never talked to you about his past friends or family.

"My parents died years ago. My aunt was my only family member and she died recently and my friends went to college in another state so we lost touch." Was the only thing he answered.

You were dying to know more. You were too curious. You weren't insensitive though and you didn't want to push him to tell you things you knew he wasn't ready to say.

Maybe you should have asked a little more. Maybe about why he ended his last relationship, because you knew he'd had one.

Or why he never talked about it. All of this was an unknown to you.

- 4 months earlier -

You had been dating for two months as an official couple when you both decided to move to the next level in your relationship.

Peter knew you were a virgin and had never done anything with anyone beyond a steamy make out session and you were surprised (and somewhat relieved) to learn that he hadn't either even though he had a girlfriend.

Peter commented that he and MJ had never gone any further, however, he was open to going as fast or as slow as you thought best.

And so it was, when in one of your hectic make out sessions in his small apartment, you ended up with your lips around his cock and the tip of it hitting the back of your throat.

Clearly you both agreed and that wasn't the only thing that happened that night. A few minutes after his cum ran down your throat, your boyfriend knelt on the bed and spread your legs and positioned himself between them.

More than returning the favor, Peter was going crazy over the soaking wetness of your hormones in the big wet patch that inhabited your panties. His arachnid senses were driving him to a point where he found himself drooling to taste you, to devour you as if he hadn't eaten in years.

And, with your consent. Peter wasn't going to stop until the last drop of your fluids was tasted by his tongue.

- 3 months earlier -

And then came your first fight. You were upset with Peter aka spiderman, because he hadn't answered your messages all day after going out on patrol the night before without telling you he had returned home safely.

His excuse was "my phone ran out of battery" but you knew it was a lie because every time you sent him a message, the word "received" appeared and two little popcorns reinforced it.

The messages did arrive. Peter just didn't want to answer them or was too busy to do so. Either way, he was lying to you and that's what bothered you the most.

You already knew he was Spiderman, what else could he be hiding from you? you asked yourself.

What you didn't know was that Peter made a trip to MIT every week to check on Ned and his ex-girlfriend MJ.

It was probably best that you didn't know. Parker wouldn't know how to explain it to you and he didn't want to have to.

You were his girlfriend now, you were practically all he had. But it wasn't easy for him to let go of what he had lost with such regret and he wondered how things would have been if everything hadn't gotten out of control.

And that was the reason why the brown-haired man didn't answer the phone. He couldn't answer it to the present, which was you. As he watched MJ, who was his past, study through the window of one of the libraries.

You were finally able to settle your argument. Peter apologized and said it wouldn't happen again. However, he never gave you a real explanation of what had happened and, since it was the first time, you preferred not to argue and let it go.

You didn't want to pressure him, although perhaps you were being too understanding.

- 2 Months before -

And you finally had your first time. The first time for both of you, together and as individuals.

It was a bit awkward due to your mutual inexperience but once you got the hang of it, you couldn't stop and it became a magical night that neither of you would ever forget.

"I'm glad you were my first time" you heard him murmur in your ear as he moved his index and ring fingers over your arm in a caressing manner.

"I'm glad you were mine" you smiled and left a kiss on his lips. All you wanted was to freeze this moment in time and treasure it forever.

You had had your first time with someone you loved and you knew he wouldn't leave you just because you had already had sex with him.

Peter was a kind and sweet man. He was everything you had always dreamed of in a perfect boyfriend and nothing could ruin the bubble of happiness you both had gotten into.

That night, the hazel-eyed boy couldn't sleep. His thoughts wandered as he watched you sleep and, for the first time since the incident. He allowed himself to be completely happy without feeling guilty about what he had left behind.

For the first time in a long time he allowed himself to feel complete and loved. In addition, he made the decision not to check back on the people of his past. He had to move forward just as they had done and because he had you.

You were now his world and all he wanted was to make you happy and protect you from all evil and danger.

That night. Peter understood that all the love and peace he had lost. Now he had regained them with only one person and that person was you.

It was time to make new friends, enjoy his present and look to the future.

- 1 month earlier -

One night, Peter was kissing your neck while you were sitting on his lap. You slid your hands under his shirt and heard him moan as your fingers brushed against something you didn't know was there.

"I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" you asked in a sweet but concerned tone.

"It's okay, I'm fine" He tried to affirm you with one of his smiles but you knew it wasn't right.

"Can I?" You looked him straight in the eye as your hands traced the edge of his shirt. As soon as he nodded, you lifted it up and saw a cut that wasn't there yesterday. "Peter, what happened here?" your voice sounded sad. It was the first time you had seen a cut that size on his abdomen.

"I slipped and fell on a glass. I'm fine, it's not serious, darling" He ran his hand across your cheek and tucked a lock of your hair behind your ear.

"It's serious to me" you sighed and looked him in the eyes "Can I help you clean it and bandage it?" You mumbled. The brown-haired man nodded with a slight smile and watched you walk into the bathroom.

Unbeknownst to you, that was the first of many times you helped Peter with his bumps and bruises. Plus, you became his accomplice and his chair girl at the same time.

Now Peter Parker understood that he was not alone, he had you.

- Two weeks before -

You and Peter were at the fair. You had gone through most of the rides, especially the ones that make you throw up, and thought it was time to get something to eat.

"Hot dogs?" you asked as you held his hands in front of you.

"I'm dying for a hot dog" he nodded with a smile and tried to go for them but you stopped him.

"Wait here" you laughed. "Can't a girlfriend treat her boyfriend to a hot dog?" You raised one of your eyebrows.

"Sure she can" the brown guy laughed, grabbed your waist and kissed your lips "don't be too long."

"I won't" you smiled and kissed his lips one last time before walking towards the stall that wasn't too far from there.

Peter smiled as he watched you walk away until a voice called out to him. A voice he hadn't heard in a while.

"Peter?" said MJ behind him. Peter turned and froze not knowing what to say. "Peter it's me, MJ" Michelle took a step towards him. "I remember everything."

Peter's mind began to spin and his heart began to race.

"How?" your boyfriend asked in just a whisper.

"Maybe you were erased from my memory but your stuff wasn't" MJ smiled slightly "the necklace, your pictures and among other things were still in my room at my parents' house" she sighed. "It took me longer than I expected but I told you. I figured it out once, I'll do it again" her eyes were watery.

"You were always so smart" Peter smiled and took another step forward. He knew he shouldn't. You'd be back any minute but the shock and excitement was too strong. "You remember..." peter took her face in his hands.

"I do" she nodded smiling and wiped a tear from Peter's cheek.

Before either of them realized it, their lips were already pressed against each other. MJ remembered. That was all Peter was thinking at that moment and it would have been perfect except you were a few steps away from them, two hot dogs in hand and a completely broken heart as you watched Peter, YOUR Peter, kissing someone else.

- Present day -

"Y/n... please, I just want to talk" he pleads. His gaze is as pleading as a puppy's when he sees that you only have one bite left and you haven't given him any yet.

"I think I need time" you say without looking at him.

"Time? Y/n, please. Let me explain," says the chestnut while holding the door so you don't close it.

"What are you going to explain to me? Why you had your tongue in someone else's mouth while I was watching you?" You stop trying to close the door and look him in the eye.

"It wasn't just anyone" he walks past you and enters your apartment without your permission. "It's MJ."

"Your ex-girlfriend? That's supposed to make me feel better?" your head hurt. You hadn't eaten or slept well for two weeks.

"No, y/n. It's not that" he denies. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, just let me explain." He tries to take your hands but you take a step back.

"You said you were over because she was in another university" you cross your arms.

"That's partly true" he sighs. "A year and a few months ago Mystery revealed my identity to everyone. MJ was my girlfriend at the time and my best friend's name was Ned-" he takes a breath and continues. "I went to doctor strange and asked him to cast a spell but it all went terribly wrong and I-"

"What does this have to do with you kissing your ex?" you frown.

"The point is. Villains from many multiverses showed up and to right my wrong Dr. Strange had to cast a spell making everyone forget who Peter Parker is" he continued.

"Including MJ?" you ask.

"Including MJ" He nods.

"So you broke up because she didn't remember you. Not because you wanted to break up with her" you deduce.

"Yeah and, the night of the fair. MJ showed up and said she remembered everything. I don't know how but I got carried away with my emotions and did something stupid without thinking about anything else-"

"Or anyone else" you interrupt him and dry your tears with the sleeves of your sweater.

"You don't know how sorry I am. I never meant to hurt you. I love you more than anything, Y/n" his eyes crystallize.

"But you love her too" your voice cracks. "What do you plan to do now? What's your plan, Peter?"

"I... I don't know" he dries his nose with his arm.

"You love her. You didn't want to leave her." You sob. "Why don't you go back to her then? You can tell you're not over her" you were trying to stay strong but it was practically impossible.

You didn't even understand how you believed his crazy story, but this was Peter we were talking about. Spider-Man in a world where people disappeared for 5 years because a purple alien had snapped his fingers using the infinity gems. It wasn't too crazy to believe that everyone forgot who Peter Parker was.

"I am over her. I decided to stop watching her the first time we- we slept together" he whispers in a sigh.

"When?" you frown. "What?" you analyze word for word what he said "You decided to stop watching her? What the fuck does that mean?" Now more than hurt, you were confused and annoyed.

"I-. I used to go to her college and watch her and Ned just to see how they were doing and to make sure nothing bad happened to them." He tries to explain. "One of those times I forgot to text you and told you my phone was out of battery." He swallows.

"I knew you lied to me, Peter. You were never good at lying," you sob. "But I never believed you were watching your ex all this time" you sit back on the couch. You are weak, as weak as someone famished. "I thought we were both 100% in this relationship but you kept clinging to the past" your vision is blurry, you don't know if from tears or lack of sleep.

"I know I should have been honest. I shouldn't have lied to you. I should have trusted you with my thoughts and feelings... it's just not easy for me" he sits down next to you and his hand rests on your knee.

"So what are you doing here then, Parker?" you use his last name. You're being serious and he knows it. Although, if he's bothered by your name calling, he doesn't say so. "It's more than clear that you've been waiting for this moment for a long time. Why don't you go with her? I can't compete with that, I never could." Your eyes watch the tile and you just hope you don't faint. It all feels so overwhelming.

"It's not about competing. It's not a competition, love." The endearing nickname leaves his lips but doesn't give you butterflies this time.

"Of course it's about competing! What was me? Your consolation prize?" You look him in the eye. He can't hold your gaze, he knows he did too much damage. "You settled for me just because you couldn't have her? Well congratulations, your pleas have been heard. Now get the hell out of my apartment!" You raise your voice and get up from the couch. You are upset with him but with you more than anyone else for allowing yourself to love him without first asking more questions and pressing for an answer.

"Y/n please...don't say those things. You know I love you. I fell in love with you the moment I met you" his gaze is pleading. He doesn't want to leave, he doesn't want to leave you but he doesn't know how to stay either.

"I don't know if you love me, I don't know if it's true" you sniff. "What I do know is that I love you and you hurt me like I never thought you would. Don't get me wrong, besides your girlfriend, I was your best friend and as a friend I understand how happy you must be that your first love remembers who you are. But I also understand that that "first love" is not me. Pick her, Peter. Go to her. You were always more hers than mine. Even when we were together you were looking for her."

"---I don't want to be your second choice, it hurts too much." You squeeze your eyes shut to still your sobs. "Pick her, it was always her."

It has always been her.

-------------------------------------

Peter Parker Tags:

@raajali3 @fangirling-galore @powerpuffluuvv @itszulli @hallecarey1 @xoxokiaraaxoxo @kaitieskidmore1 @lnmp89 @pure-a-tea @vixparker

'Choices' Tags:

@parkerpeterparker2004 @afro-hispwriter

If your user name is lined it's because tumblr didn't let me tag you :(.

#peter parker angst #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker #peter parker au #peter parker and reader #spiderman x reader #spiderman fanfiction #spiderman #no way home #spiderman tom holland #tom holland spiderman #tom holland #fanfic #fanfics #fanfiction #angst #angst with bad ending

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gravedigginbbydoll · 11 months

Text

The Wolves of Hawkins Wood

werewolf! Eddie x F! Reader

AN: BuT ArEn'T YoU on A BrEaK? mind ur business okay, stfu. jk jk I love y'all. I'm currently just taking a break from Hawkins University AU, but recently got an itch to write this. This'll be a super short little series probably and may contain smut but will mainly be fluff and angst! It will not be updated regularly, but it's just a side project for funsies. Also I will make a masterlist for it later, i swear! It's based off of The Wolves of Mercy Falls (one of my favorite favorite series), and meant to just be kinda cozy but spooky themed bc werewolves? Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: MDNI! possibly mature themes and smut in the future. Werewolves, injury, scars, animalistic violence, depression, identity struggles, near death experiences, trauma, love/ drawn to at first sight. MC is kinda a wolf girl? (i'm channeling and healing my childhood self, okay?)

Chapter One: Valruv

You had moved to Hawkins one winter, the bitter cold and snow new to you. The days consisted of you exploring the wilderness, the trees and snow all new to you. You took plenty of photographs, hoping your camera would capture the rawness of it all. You had wandered a bit too far one day, your foot slipping as you fell off a small ledge, spraining your ankle and breaking your arm. You shouted and groaned in pain, laying in the snow, skin going numb. You must’ve hit your head, the way your vision was going in and out. You felt your vision go black and your mind race. The next thing you knew, you woke up to yourself being dragged by the hood of your coat to the edge of your backyard and the forest. You panicked, trying to sit up slightly, feeling pain shoot up your arm. You winced, trying to turn your head instead. A large wolf with an almost light chocolate brown coat and warm brown eyes holding the hood of your jacket between gentle teeth, dragging you to the edge of the clearing. You felt your heart race but a sort of calmness washed over you. How did this wild creature know where you lived? The wolf soon bounded off, but not before staring at you with intelligent almost human eyes.

You had received help after that, calling an ambulance with your good arm and letting your thoughts take over. You were helped and warned against being outside near the woods alone when the weather and conditions were not kind. You took the advice with a grain of salt, your mind still on those intelligent eyes.

After that, you began to sit out on your deck every evening, watching for the wolf. You still couldn’t understand how it saved you or why. You would see the wolf and occasionally it’s pack every so often, a chill running down your spine and your heart picking up. Their howls pulled at your heart, the sound melodic and mournful. You felt drawn to them. You needed to know why.

Which led to you frequenting the bookstore, skimming shelves of nonfiction on wolves. You had so many questions. Why did the wolves here seemingly disappear in the spring and summer according to townsfolk? Why did that one save you? None of the books answered the questions. Not a single one. The weather was getting warmer and you still hadn’t found answers.

You stood in the bookstore at the section you were at constantly, eyes skimming to try and find something new. You had no answers and just more questions. Hawkins itself was an odd town, what with the small population and ever present gossip, a persistent trend of individuals winding up missing. You found a slightly newer book, one with frayed backing and yellowed pages. You smiled at it, clearly happy you found something in the monotony of the usual visit. You walked up to the counter, rummaging through your bag and not looking up, placing the book on the counter.

“Just this?”

The low and unfamiliar timbre of the voice caused you to look up, your breath catching in your throat. A tall man with unruly brown curls stood before you, his eyes a warm brown. It seemed he was littered in tattoos and silver jewelry. He wore a worn out Megadeth shirt, the black faded to an almost gray. You looked up into his eyes, feeling your face heat up. His eyes…reminded you of the wolf. You also didn’t recognize the man, which was saying a lot as Hawkins was a small town. You nodded at the stranger, pulling out a twenty to pay him. You felt your mouth moving and heard the words come out before you could stop yourself.

“Are you new here?”

He rang you up and took the bill, blinking a bit in surprise at your question but then smiling a crooked grin, dimples appearing.

“No, I just visit when the weather gets warm. My Uncle Wayne lives in town.”

You nod, grabbing your book and heading off. Your mind still swimming with questions…but now a small piece was also consumed by the stranger.

The next time you ran into the stranger, you were talking a walk along the edge of the wood, lost in thought. You were staring up at the trees, oblivious to your surroundings. You felt a shoulder bump yours and you flinched, turning to apologize.

You saw his eyes first, the warm brown tone still causing the hairs on the back of your neck to stick up. You looked up at him in apology, voice soft.

“Sorry, I was looking at the trees.”

He chuckled, shaking his head. His unruly brown curls were now in a messy bun, making his eyes more visible. You smelled wood on him…bark, dirt, crisp air, sweet and almost over ripened fruit. Along with something musky and almost…animal-like. You wanted to inhale the scent.

“It’s alright. They’re beautiful.”

He stared unabashedly at you while saying it. You felt your stomach twist in nervousness and your heart leap as your face heated up slowly. You grinned and gave a pathetic excuse for needing to go, dashing off in the other direction to stamp down the feelings.

The next time you saw the stranger was unexpected.

You were headed to the local bar in town, clearly tired from a long day at your 9 to 5, wishing you didn’t have to pay bills on top of your Photography gig. You opted to meet a cute coworker here, swayed by his charming smile. But truthfully, all you could do is worry about where the wolves had gone. Where your wolf had gone. You ordered an easy drink, something like a Rum and Coke, and sat at the bar in thought. You were pulled out of your daze when the stranger came out onto the bar's very pathetic excuse for a stage, a red electric guitar slung across his back. You watched as he and group of guys began setting up their instruments.

You studied him openly, thankful that his back was facing you for the most part. His hair was up again in that messy tuft of curls. He wore a band t-shirt that had the sleeves cut off, his arms on full display. You could see now in the stage light the pretty ink decorating his skin and the chunks and patches of silvery pink flesh that were scars. He had a few on his arms and one on his shoulder. You couldn’t help but wonder what it was from, as they didn’t look like an average scar from a cut or falling off a bike. They also seemed like…chunks of flesh bitten out and scarred over.

You quickly turned to face your drink when he turned around, feeling embarrassed for your silly obsession. Just…something about him was so…intriguing.

The stranger seemed to walk up to the mic, tapping his finger on it before his cheerful and energetic voice came through the speakers. You kept yourself from turning around.

“Heyo, Hawkins! I’m Eddie, this is Gareth, Jeff, and Rich! We’re Corroded Coffin and-”

Your eavesdropping (could you call it that if he was announcing his presence to the bar?) was cut short when your coworker, Tommy, showed up. He scrunched his nose in the direction of the stage before smiling down at you.

“Lemme pay for your drink and we can head somewhere…quieter.”

You nodded, Eddie and his band in the background, but you could clearly hear his melodic singing voice and his impressive guitar skills. You tried to ignore it.

Tommy paid for your drink, grabbing your hand and helping you off the chair, guiding you by the arm towards the door. You could somehow still feel those powerful brown eyes on you.

Winter was creeping in, winds crisp and the scent of fall fading. You mourned the loss of fall. The sidewalks no longer filled with the familiar crackle of fallen leaves, the scent of apples and fresh rain now replaced by icy sleet and the smell of smoky firewood. But at least it meant you could be provided some comfort by the wolves.

You had recently started feeding them, leaving out little pieces of meat at the edge of the clearing, watching through the window as they would grab it and run off. You even got to feed your wolf, smiling as it ate the meat gently from your hand and you gently pet its scruff, the smell of the wild woods still in its fur. It was an intelligent animal, and you wanted a way to express your gratitude for the creature saving you.

However, it seemed your efforts led to more damage than good.

The wolves seemed to be closer to town, and after the disappearance of Chrissy Cunningham and her fiance Jason Carver claiming she was dragged away and mauled by wolves, the town was issuing a hunt on the local pack. The mayor was clearly pressured by the townsfolk to carry it out. The mayor urged people to stay inside as they attempted to drive out the wolves. You felt your heart squeeze at the idea, seized by fear at the thought of never seeing your wolf again.

You stood on the edge of the clearing, hoping and praying maybe the mayor would give up. Maybe the young Chrissy had run away, disillusioned by her seemingly perfect life. In the midst of this tumbling string of thoughts, you spotted a familiar outline in the trees of a wolf, clearly unstable and stumbling. You walked over cautiously, seeing your wolf stumble out into the clearing near your house, the poor creature’s fur caked in blood. You saw the wolf stumble and you felt your heart seize. How could you help it? What would-

And then you saw the wolf lay and curl up, seeming to shake and whine as a muzzle shortened and fur peeled back, limbs lengthening. You stood there, heart pounding as you stared down at the creature- no, the human.

There on the ground lay a naked and shivering Eddie, curls free and matted with blood, a pale hand pressed against his neck as his eyes rolled back and fluttered weakly.

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chvoswxtch · 1 year

Text

trouble

pairing: frank castle x fem!reader

summary: it's been almost two weeks since you've seen frank, and in his absence, you've been left in the questionably capable hands of billy russo.

warnings: swearing, angst, mentions of alcohol, brief mention of death

word count: 6k

a/n: this is part 3 of this series! i'm so so so happy that you guys are enjoying bodyguard frankie. I still don't have a clear idea of how many parts this will be, but as long as you keep wanting it, i'll keep writing it. as a reminder, this is going to be a slow burn. ;) & as always, feedback is welcomed/appreciated!

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It had been two weeks since you had seen Frank. You had found out from one of the other bodyguards that he was on a special assignment, and was due back in another week or so. It was hard not to let your mind wander about where he was, what he was doing, who he was with…if he didn’t like being away from you as much as you despised being away from him.

He probably hasn’t thought about you once.

You shoved that thought as far back into your mind as you could, focusing back on the blank document that was currently mocking you from your computer screen. A knock sounded on your door, and as you looked up, you saw a face that you’d been seeing more and more of lately in Frank’s absence.

Billy Russo.

“Mr. Russo.”

“C’mon Y/N/N, how many times I gotta tell you to call me Billy. Mr. Russo’s so…formal.”

“Says the man always in a three piece suit.”

“I got appearances to keep up.”

Billy flashed you a charming grin as he smoothed out the lapels of his suit jacket, undoing the middle button as he closed the door behind him and took a seat in the chair directly in front of your desk.

“Are you always this hands on with all of your clients? I’ve seen you more this past week than I’ve seen my own boss.”

“Nah, you’re a special situation that requires special attention.”

“Why’s that?”

Billy leaned back in the chair as he looked at you, that cheshire grin splitting further across his lips as he let his eyes wander shamelessly over your figure. Billy Russo was one of those guys that knew he was attractive, which only made him less attractive to you. He always looked too perfect. Always dressed in the most expensive suits, not a single hair ever out of place, beard always trimmed and neat, constantly being driven around in numerous luxury cars. While he wasn’t overly cocky, there was a smugness about him that made you want to roll your eyes every time he was around. Billy owned the company that Frank and the others worked for, but you hadn’t been able to figure out why he had been coming to visit you at least once a day for the past week.

“Told Frankie I’d look after you personally.”

Frankie.

You sat up a little straighter at the mention of Frank’s name, staring curiously at Billy as your face morphed into an expression of interest.

“Why?”

“Because he asked me to. Apparently, you like to cause trouble.”

Billy’s eyes twinkled with mischief as he adjusted the Rolex watch on his wrist, never once breaking eye contact with you. Whatever hope that had been ignited by the first half of his words was immediately snuffed out by the second half.

Frank wasn’t concerned about you. He had warned Billy about you.

Tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, you crossed your arms over your chest as you leaned back into your chair and stared blankly at your computer.

“I’m not causing any trouble any time soon. Trust me.”

“Regrettin’ your decision that caused all this?”

Billy gestured between himself and the other bodyguards outside your office, the grin on his lips faltering as he stared at you with genuine novelty. Narrowing your eyes slightly as you stared back at him, you pursed your lips and shook your head defiantly.

“I didn’t cause anything.”

Tapping his index finger against the wood of the arm chair, Billy cocked his head to the side as he surveyed you silently for a moment.

“Can I ask you somethin’?”

“I feel like even if I say no you’re going to anyway.”

The playful smirk returned to Billy’s mouth as he held his hands up in surrender for a moment before letting them drop back onto his lap.

“You can tell me to fuck off if you want.”

Letting out a dry laugh, you rolled your eyes as you glanced around your office before focusing back on him, giving a gentle nod of your head.

“Go ahead.”

“Why did you do it?”

The faint smile on your lips disappeared at his question. You lightly dug your nails into your palms, a slight sense of enragement filling your veins as you stared blankly at the notes in front of you. People had been asking you that ever since the article came out, and you were sick of justifying yourself.

“Because I didn’t want those assholes to think I agreed with anything they stood for.”

“You did write an article praisin’ the Punisher. He took justice into his own hands. That’s what those guys think they’re doing-”

“I didn’t praise him. I wrote an article about the complexities of vigilantes and the weaknesses in the justice system. What the Punisher did wasn’t right, but he never hurt anyone that didn’t deserve it. These…these cowards, they’re homegrown terrorists. They go after anyone that doesn’t agree with them-”

“And you thought it was smart to antagonize them?”

Billy leaned forward with his forearms on his thighs, staring directly into your eyes with a look of severity you hadn’t seen in him before. Shaking your head slowly, you let out a deep exhale of frustration before meeting his gaze again.

“They took my words and twisted them to fit and justify their own fucked up narrative. I didn’t want them or anyone else thinking for a second that I agreed with, or believed in their bullshit ‘cause’. They’ve hurt and killed innocent people. I wanted them to know exactly what I thought of them. And I’d do it all fucking over again, exactly the same. I don’t regret anything.”

Maybe it wasn’t the brightest idea to offend a group that had been terrorizing New York with various bomb threats and attacks, but you couldn’t sit idly by while they used your Punisher article to justify themselves. Maybe you shouldn’t have verbally eviscerated the leader that had called into your radio interview, or write that scathing follow up piece that further dismantled his ego. It certainly would have kept him from threatening you and everyone that worked at your paper, forcing Homeland Security to get involved, and causing you to walk around with an assigned shadow the past few months.

But what was your other option? Stay quiet and let them think you were on their side just because they were dangerous? Live in fear of pissing off some weak man with a fragile ego?

Fuck that.

Billy’s lips once again split into a wolfish grin, and his eyes almost seemed to be glowing with something that resembled pride. He nodded his head in a sign of respect, settling back into the chair as his eyes once again roamed over you.

“I see why he likes you.”

Blinking a few times, you stared in dumbfoundment as Billy’s words settled in your ears. A dark chuckle left his lips as he stood, buttoning his jacket up while he made his way over to your door. Pausing in the entryway, he lightly gripped onto the handle and looked at you over his shoulder with a smirk.

“See you Saturday night, doll.”

“W-what?”

“The gala. You’re goin’ still, right?”

“Uh…yeah. Why?”

“Who do you think is takin’ you in Castle’s absence?”

Stunning you silent for the second time in less than two minutes, Billy’s lips spread into a smirk as he dropped his left eye into a wink, closing your door shut behind him to leave you alone with a flurry of thoughts swirling around in your head like a snowglobe that had been violently shaken.

The gala.

Fuck.

Frank was supposed to be your escort. He was the primary one in charge of your detail at all times. Billy had assured your boss and Homeland that Frank was the best of the best, and the only time he swapped out with someone else was when they changed shifts during week nights. Or when he was pulled to do something that was more important than protect you from a terrorist group, apparently. A part of you wondered if he really was pulled, or if he had requested a break from you after the shit you had pulled.

There was no denying the disappointment you felt at the thought of not getting to see Frank all dressed up for a black tie event. It made sense Billy would be the one to take his place. He would blend in a lot easier than Frank, but he wasn’t who you wanted to spend the evening with. Dragging your palms down your face, you let out a deep exhale as you picked up your notes for the article you were supposed to be working on, the words blurring together in a jumbled mess as you read over them for the millionth time. You’d had an extremely hard time focusing lately with Frank being gone, trying your hardest not to think about the look on his face when he had left, the wedding ring around his neck, or anything about him. But now with Billy’s confession echoing in your ears, it was even harder.

I see why he likes you.

»»———　　———««

Billy was having the absolute time of his fucking life, and that annoyed you to your wits end. There wasn’t a single person in attendance at the gala he didn’t know, or didn’t seem to want to kiss his ass, and since you had promised not to cause any trouble, you weren’t to leave his side at all. Which meant you had to wait for him to finally shut the fuck up whenever you were ready for another trip to the open bar.

A tiny piece of you hated to admit that having Billy as your escort wasn’t all bad. He’d picked you up in a Rolls Royce and practically undressed you with his eyes, keeping his compliments professional but not bothering to hide the hunger in his voice. While it stroked your ego the way he kept eyeing you in your dress, you quickly remembered that Billy Russo hit on anything with tits and a heartbeat. It did make you breathe a little easier that he was such an important person though, hoping that meant no one would try anything with you while you were in his company, and that the night wouldn’t end in fireworks.

Sipping at your third glass of red wine, you watched as socialites and powerful political figures alike mingled in their fanciest outfits. An hour into the event you’d convinced Billy to let you sit at a table in his direct line of sight, growing bored of following him around like a shadow as he networked. Lightly trailing your index finger up and down the stem of your wine glass, your mind once again drifted to Frank. He wouldn’t have let you sit at a table all alone. He’d be the one following you around.

You wondered if he’d like your dress. It was a simple emerald green satin gown with a low cut back and a deep v line that stopped at your sternum. You’d originally picked it out with him in mind, wondering if the way it hugged your body and showed off your figure would finally get your resigned bodyguard’s attention. A dry laugh left your lips at the thought of him, knowing he realistically would’ve just grunted in response when you asked if he liked it, looking anywhere but at you as he scanned the room like a guard dog.

You missed Frank. You wondered if you would’ve gotten him to joke with you again if he had come tonight. You thought about picking out pretentious victims from the crowd with him, making up stories about who they were, misreading their lips on purpose knowing what they were actually talking about was far more ridiculous than anything the two of you could come up with. You wondered if he would’ve danced with you if you asked. You wondered if he would’ve asked.

You wondered where he was.

You wondered if he was with his wife.

Swallowing the rest of the bitter burgundy contents in your glass, you glanced up when Billy’s tall figure suddenly appeared in front of you. He eyed your empty glass, flickering his eyes to yours with a playful arch of one of his dark brows.

“You gonna pace yourself?”

“I’ll be fine. You’re lucky I’m not drinking tequila.”

“So I’ve heard.”

Rolling your eyes, you leaned back into your chair and smoothed your dress out, tucking a loose curl behind your ear. Billy unbuttoned his suit jacket as he sat down beside you, turning his body towards you slightly.

“You know, I’ve never seen someone look so unhappy at a party.”

“I’m not unhappy.”

“You’re not havin’ a good time. What, I’m not good enough company for you?”

“How would I know? You’ve spent the whole night being the life of the party instead of my security escort.”

Billy stiffened slightly beside you, causing you to let out a deep exhale as you turned your head to look at him with an apologetic expression.

“I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair. You weren’t even supposed to be babysitting me tonight. You should be having a good time for having to put up with my shit.”

Billy placed his hand on your wrist, causing you to face him again as he looked at you completely void of his usual playful charm.

“Hey, I’m not babysittin’ you. I’m here to look after you. I know Frank can be a bit too hands on, so I was givin’ you your space. Didn’t want you to feel suffocated, that’s all. But if I’m bein’ too hands off, I can change that. Whatever makes you feel more comfortable.”

The sincerity in Billy’s voice caught you off guard, and it made you feel guilty. He didn’t hardly know you, and he certainly didn’t owe you anything. He was doing all of this because it was his job, and as a favor to Frank. Glancing around at all the people in attendance, you nibbled slightly at the inside of your cheek before looking back at Billy.

“Did…did he tell you about that night in the bar?”

Billy sat up a little straighter as his lips pressed into a set line, giving a slight nod of his head in your direction.

“He did.”

“That was my fault. I fucked up. And all I’ve been able to think about since…is how any one of those guys could’ve been one of them, and that would’ve been it. I haven’t felt comfortable in a crowd since. Shit…I haven’t felt comfortable since I got that first death threat. But I wasn’t really…scared until that night. I don’t know what would’ve happened if-”

Letting out a shaky breath, you averted your gaze down to your lap, brushing your hair away from your face as you held onto the back of your own neck in an attempt to self soothe. You weren’t sure why you were telling Billy all of this. You weren’t sure why you were feeling so vulnerable and emotional. But you were suddenly feeling grateful for his presence as he took your hand into his and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“Hey, nothin’ is gonna happen to you tonight. I promise. If you want me to stay with you, I will. I’ll go where you go. You want me to fuck off, I will. You just let me know what you need. You wanna leave?”

“No…no I didn’t…nearly have a breakdown in my bathroom because my hair wouldn’t cooperate just to leave so soon.”

The edge of Billy’s mouth curved upwards into a smirk, nodding slowly as he leaned back in his chair and ran his fingers through his own hair to push it back into place.

“I know the feelin’.”

Rolling your eyes, you let out a soft laugh as you stared at him incredulously.

“Oh please. Like Billy Russo ever has a bad hair day.”

“Hey, you see the finished product, not the bloodbath it took to get there.”

Billy abruptly craned his neck to look past you, furrowing his dark brows as he nodded sharply at someone before glancing down at you with a softer expression.

“You excuse me for a sec? I’ll be right back, I promise.”

“Yeah, sure. I’m gonna go find the bathroom anyway.”

Billy paused in the middle of standing up, glancing between you and the hallway that led to where the bathrooms were, lifting his brows up slightly as he looked at you again.

“I can wait for you if-”

“No, it’s alright. Besides, I know you got eyes all over this place.”

Looking up at him with a soft smile on your lips, you watched as Billy’s lips pulled into a wide grin before he winked.

“Goddamn right I do.”

Never in a million years did you think you would be baring your soul to Billy Russo, or that confessing your fears to him would make you feel lighter, but surprisingly it did. Perhaps you had been just as wrong about him as you had been about Frank.

For the first time all evening, you felt like you could actually breathe. Billy’s words had a calming effect on you, and you didn’t feel anxious anymore as you walked alone towards the bathrooms. The long hallway was surprisingly empty and seemed to go on forever. You paused as you noticed a set of french doors at the end of the hall that were slightly opened, revealing a balcony of some kind. You walked right past the bathrooms as your inquisitiveness got the better of you.

“Where you think you’re goin’?”

Instantly freezing in place, a surprised gasp flew past your lips when a familiar deep gruff voice cut through the sound of your heels clacking along the empty tiled hallway.

You knew that voice.

Frank.

Quickly spinning around, your eyes widened considerably as you took in the sight in front of you; Frank Castle in a sleek all black suit.

He was the most cleaned up you had ever seen him. Frank had been growing his hair out lately, enough for you to notice it had a bit of a curly texture to it, but it looked like he had gotten it trimmed recently, and it was pushed back into a neat style. There weren’t any bruises or cuts littering his face, and it looked like he had just shaved since his usual five o’clock shadow was gone. The suit somehow made him look even bigger. His shoulders looked immensely broader in the jacket, and the dark material clung to his bulging arms and thick thighs as if it had been tailored to fit him perfectly.

The thought briefly crossed your mind that it probably had been if it had been provided by Billy for the event.

Thank you Billy Russo.

You were all of a sudden painfully aware that Frank had been staring at you silently, essentially watching you ogle at him as he waited for your answer. His features were set in an indifferent expression that had a hint of irritation lingering beneath, one you had gotten all too familiar with, and it caused a flush of scarlet to coat your cheeks as you parted your lips to speak and tried to remember how.

“I…just…was curious. About what’s out there. I saw the door was open…and…what-what are you doing here?”

“Russo’s fuckin’ job apparently.”

Blinking a few times, you were stunned silent by the anger that bit through Frank’s words, noticing the ember of vexation that burned in his deep espresso eyes. Your brain was still trying to process the sight of him in a suit, and you struggled to figure out what he seemed to be pissed off about until Billy’s name clicked it all into place.

“Don’t be mad at him. I told him I was just going to the bathroom and coming right back. That’s…my fault. I got sidetracked.”

“Didn’t realize you two were so close.”

A muscle feathered in Frank’s jaw as his coarse voice spit those words into your ear, and you crossed your arms over your chest as you leaned against the wall and lightly shrugged your shoulders, averting your gaze to the fancy tiled floor.

“I wouldn’t say that. I think tonight is the most I’ve ever talked to him.”

“Seemed pretty close when you were holdin’ his hand.”

Flickering your eyes up to meet Frank’s, your lips parted in shock.

How long had he been here?

You furrowed your brows slightly as you tried to figure out what he was talking about. A look of realization spread over your face when it dawned on you that Billy had held your hand at the table earlier when you had opened up about the night at the bar with Frank and your current apprehensions about crowds.

Why did he sound so pissed off about that?

Shaking your head slowly, you tucked some of your hair behind your ear as you stared down at the floor once again, unable to meet his fiery disappointed gaze.

“That wasn’t…he was just being nice. I was giving him shit about spending more time flaunting himself than looking after me. It’s…been a long week and I wasn’t…I was feeling uneasy about being here tonight.”

In a flash Frank was in front of you, his large hand lightly gripping onto your chin to force you to look up at him as his eyes frantically searched over your form.

“Why? Somethin’ happen?”

The way Frank could switch from a broody, intimidating man that could snap someone in half with his bare hands to a gentler version of himself that spoke to you and touched you as if you were made of glass in less than a millisecond nearly gave you whiplash and always left you in a daze. You stared up into his concerned eyes almost in a trance, lightly wrapping your fingers around his wrist as you let out a breath.

“No. Nothing happened, it's just…since the bar…I’ve just…been kinda freaked out. I’ve never really liked crowds, but now they make me even more nervous. It’s…it’s my fault. I did all this to myself.”

“Don’t say that. You didn’t do nothin’ wrong.”

“I put myself in danger. When I wrote those articles…when I said what I did to him…that night at the bar…I just…have a really awful habit of putting myself in bad situations, apparently.”

Frank’s lips parted slightly, as if he was going to say something, but you were caught on the way his features had softened substantially as he stared down at you. There was an emotion lingering in his eyes that looked like pity, or maybe remorse, but you couldn’t make it out. It was always so hard to read him.

“Oh, shit.”

Frank instantly turned his head in the direction of Billy’s voice, dropping his hand from your face and standing up a little straighter as his expression of annoyance from earlier returned full force.

“You wanna tell me why she’s alone?”

“She was just goin’ to the bathroom, Frankie. Relax. I got four guys watchin’ cameras, and twelve posted around the whole place.”

“I asked you for one thing, Bill. One goddamn thing.”

“Frank-”

“I asked you to watch her, personally. That means watch her. Not parade yourself around like fuckin’ royalty while she sits by herself at a fuckin’ table and wanders around the goddamn place alone.”

Billy instantly pressed his lips into a hard line, his eyes narrowing slightly as he stared at Frank’s irritable form. Frank looked absolutely pissed off as he glared back at Billy, and for whatever reason, you felt the need to come to Billy’s defense. Moving to position yourself between the two men, you placed your hand on Frank’s chest to get his attention.

“I asked him to do that, Frank. I didn’t feel like mingling with anyone. We thought it was a smart idea if Billy looked like a regular attendee instead of a bodyguard in case anyone tried anything, and I really didn’t want the extra attention. He made sure I was where he could see me at all times. Frank, he’s been coming by my office everyday to check on me while you were gone. Please don’t be upset, it was my idea. I just didn’t want the headache.”

Frank clenched his jaw as he stared down at you, his dark eyes occasionally flickering over your head to meet Billy’s. Letting out a deep exhale through his nose, he nodded his head towards the other direction of the hallway.

“If you’re done fuckin’ around out here, get back inside.”

Frank’s voice was so rough as it came out, it felt as if he’d physically slapped you across the face. You did your best not to let your emotions get the best of you, quickly dropping your hand from Frank’s chest as if it had burned you. Giving a light submissive nod, you swiftly turned on your heel to walk back towards the party. Billy eyed you with pity as you walked past him, and you promptly dropped your gaze, not wanting him to see the hurt that threatened to slip past your waterline.

Bypassing the table that you had been sitting at, you made a beeline for the open bar, tucking yourself away at the furthest corner as you ordered your fourth glass of red wine of the night. The bitter taste on your tongue was nothing compared to the bitter resentment you felt towards Frank right now. He had been so hot and cold with you lately, it was driving you mad. You could never tell where you stood with him. You had never wanted so badly to look into another person’s mind to figure out what they were thinking or feeling. Frank was a brick wall when he wanted to be, and you weren’t sure if you had the patience or the strength to try to break through.

Ten minutes later, you felt Frank’s presence beside you before you saw him out of the corner of your eye. The scent of his cologne was more intoxicating than anything they were serving tonight, and you resisted every urge to move closer to the source.

“Might wanna consider slowin’ down. That’s your fourth one.”

So he had been here all night.

You weren’t in the mood to argue with him, so you simply slid the glass over on the bar towards him and turned around to walk back to the table. Frank caught your wrist to halt your movements, and you looked up at him with furrowed brows. His lips were downturned into a frown that tugged at your heartstrings, and the lighting above the bar cast a spotlight on the guilt pooling in his eyes.

“I didn’t say stop, just…be careful. You have a hard time findin’ your limit.”

“I know where it is, Frank. I just ignore it.”

Frank’s face twisted up with an emotion you couldn’t decipher, and as you went to tug your wrist free from his grasp, his fingers tightened to hold you firmly in place.

“Hey…look, I’m uh…I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Bein’ a dick, back there. I didn’t mean to. I…just…I asked Bill for a favor-”

“Because I’m a handful.”

Frank’s dark brows knit together in the center of his forehead as he stared down at you, features drawn in confusion.

“What? No. Cause I trust him. I know what he’s capable of, and I know he’s the only other person that could protect you as good as me.”

A fresh spell of heat pooled in your lower belly at Frank’s words, and a rosy tint rose to the surface of your cheeks.

Frank hadn’t warned Billy about you. Frank only trusted Billy with you.

“Oh…I thought…maybe you…had told him I was trouble.”

Frank cocked his head to the side while he looked at you, and suddenly a faint smirk curled at the edge of his mouth as he chuckled lowly.

“Well, that you are, sweetheart. But it wasn’t that. Matter of fact, I’m kinda disappointed you didn’t give Russo a run for his money. You only like fuckin’ with me?”

Sweetheart. There it was again.

You immediately blushed realizing Frank had been onto you, trying your best to hide your grin as you feigned an expression of mock offense.

“Frank Castle, when have I ever fucked with you?”

Frank narrowed his eyes slightly in a playful glare, arching one of his dark brows in challenge as his lips spread into a devilish grin.

“You want a list?”

Granting him a roll of your eyes, you sank your teeth into your bottom lip as you giggled, lifting your hands up in surrender as you shrugged your shoulders.

“Okay, fine. Maybe I do. Will not confirm or deny. But, I can tell you that Billy isn’t nearly as fun to be around, and I was worried that he would have an aneurysm if I derailed even a second of his perfect life.”

“Probably, but woulda been damn funny to watch.”

These were the moments it was the hardest to be around Frank. When he did let the broody facade drop. When he smiled at you, joked with you, and acted like he genuinely cared about you and that you weren’t just some assignment. Because it made it all that much harder when he inevitably switched back into your ruminative bodyguard.

“You look really good in a suit.”

As soon as the words flew past your lips, your heart started to beat faster. Those four glasses of wine were finally catching up to you and slowly dismantling the filter between your mouth and your brain. Frank’s grin faltered, and he looked completely taken aback by your comment. He quickly cleared his throat, lightly tugging at the tie around his neck as he timidly met your eyes.

“Uh, thanks. Gotta be honest, it’s real fuckin’ uncomfortable. Don’t know how the hell Bill wears these things all the goddamn time.”

“He can’t pull off jeans and a regular shirt like you can.”

Jesus Christ please shut the fuck up.

As the heat of embarrassment flamed in your cheeks, you swiftly turned your head to look anywhere but at Frank, trying your hardest to find a new subject of conversation.

“So-”

“You wanna dance?”

Frank looked just as surprised by his own question as you did, lifting his hand to awkwardly scratch at the back of his neck before gesturing around to the party.

“Since we’re s’posed to be blendin’ in and all that. You don’t gotta, just thought-”

“I do.”

A timid smile spread over your lips as you looked up at Frank, swallowing thickly as you held out your hand for him to take. Glancing between your eyes and your hand, Frank gave a slight nod and grunted quietly in response before taking your hand to lead you to the dance floor. Your hand trembled when you raised it to place on Frank’s shoulder, a quiet gasp leaving your parted lips as his large hand settled on your waist. He clasped your small hand in his large one, his deep brown eyes glancing around at everyone over your head.

“Um…can you dance?”

Frank looked almost offended by your question as he looked down at you, cocking his head to the side.

“You didn’t think to ask me that before followin’ me over here?”

“Just curious.”

“What? Don’t I look like I can dance?”

“Oh, yeah. Absolutely. I mean you’re so…graceful.”

“Smartass.”

A fit of giggles slipped past your lips as you momentarily leaned your forehead against Frank’s chest, giving his hand a gentle squeeze before pulling back to peer up at him with a grin.

“Just don’t step on my toes, please. I really like these shoes. And I’m pretty sure you would break them considering you’re twice my size.”

“Just for that I’m gonna do it on purpose. See how much trouble you can cause with two broken feet.”

Your mouth immediately fell open as you stared up at Frank with wide eyes.

“Frank!”

His eyes crinkled at the sides as he bellowed with laughter, shaking his head slowly as he lightly squeezed your waist.

“Aw c’mon, you know I’m kiddin’.”

“Actually, I don’t. I think you would. And just for that, I’m requesting a new bodyguard.”

“No.”

“What?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Cause I said so.”

You glared up at Frank with a smug grin spreading across your lips, jutting your chin out defiantly as you shrugged.

“Not your call.”

“Actually it is. See, the guys report to me, and Bill ain’t gonna challenge me. So, as I said before, no.”

Frank tilted his head to the side as he stared down at you with the ghost of a smirk covering his lips. The look in his eyes caused a fire to erupt in your lower belly, and you rolled your eyes so that you could look away. Frank was surprisingly a great dancer, making it feel as if the two of you were floating around the dance floor together effortlessly.

“You uh…you look nice.”

Whipping your head up in Frank’s direction, you stared blankly up at him as his words translated in your ears.

“What?”

“Your dress and all. Meant to tell you earlier. You uh, look…beautiful.”

The sincerity in Frank’s voice and his gaze made your heart swell, feeling as if it had completely swollen inside your ribcage. Taking in a sharp breath, you lightly squeezed onto his shoulder to steady yourself as your voice came out quiet.

“Thank you.”

Frank grunted quietly in response with a nod of his head, averting his gaze to survey the room like it was second nature. You couldn’t stop staring at him as his words swirled around inside your head.

“You’re really good at this, you know.”

A timid smile appeared on Frank’s lips as he chuckled lowly, glancing briefly down at you.

“Was worried I’d be rusty. I ain’t danced like this in quite awhile.”

“When was the last time?”

The smile on Frank’s face was instantly torn away like a vengeful tide erasing a sandcastle. You stilled as you watched his dark eyes immediately harden, the outline of his strong jawline becoming sharper as it set roughly. The shift in the mood felt as if someone had tossed a bucket of ice cold water over you, and you fumbled to backtrack.

“Sorry, I didn’t-”

“My wedding.”

Frank didn’t meet your eyes as he spoke. The playful tone of his voice from earlier was long gone, leaving nothing but the rough gravel behind.

“I…I’m sorry. I…it must be difficult for you. I’ve never been divorced-”

“Didn’t get divorced. She died.”

Frank’s confession knocked all the wind right out of your lungs. He said it so…casually, but with so much pain and anger layered beneath the syllables. The only reason his eyes met yours again was because he noticed you had stopped dancing. Frank’s eyes had become wild, completely blown open like a wound with shades of rage and grief. It caused a shiver to caress your spine.

“Frank-”

“Don’t.”

There was a hard edge to his voice, a warning mixed with a plea as he stared down at you. Giving a slight nod of your head, you snapped your mouth shut, unable to tear your gaze away from him. Frank stared you down silently for a moment before relinquishing his grip on your waist and dropping his hand from yours to take a step backwards.

“Bill will take you home.”

“What? Where are you going?”

“Got somethin’ to finish up.”

“Right now?”

Frank’s impenetrable glare stunned you once again into submission, and you found yourself nodding again since you didn’t trust your voice. Giving you one last final look over, Frank forced his way through the crowd towards the exit, leaving you completely stunned and all alone in the middle of the dance floor.

tags: @jwjeepers @day-dreaming-goddess @messymissy @itwasthereaminuteago @strawberry1042 @queenofthenoobs @wanda2themax @neverlandcity @charmedkim @stilldreaming666 @dark-academia-slut

#frank castle #frank castle x you #frank castle x y/n #frank castle x reader #frank castle x female reader #frank castle x fem!reader #frank castle x f!reader #frank castle fic #frank castle series #bodyguard!frank castle x reader #bodyguard!frank castle series #bodyguard!frank castle fic #the punisher #the punisher fic #the punisher series

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rosella35 · 5 months

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Borrowed Courage: Chapter 12

*Edit* = Kaleb's dad's physical description has changed because I'm indecisive and for next chapter's lore ;)

Oop. The last time I updated this was October 2022. I've completed an entire Master's degree since then ^^'

Thank you for being patient with me everyone! You have @fireflywritesgt and their incredible writing recently to thank for me rekindling my G/T hyperfixation and picking up my slack with Borrowed Courage. I hope you enjoy this mammoth of a chapter, kicking off the morning after Brooke and Kaleb's video call.

Word count: 7.4k *whistles*

Content warning: contains angst, swearing, and borrower gang tattoos(?)

****

A normal weekend for Kaleb was relatively boring by human standards, but to his borrower side, it was a welcome change of pace. His daily use of Upsize and constant interaction with humans meant that by the end of the week, Kaleb’s mind and body were battered to the point of exhaustion. It was for that reason that he’d come up with a rule for himself that on his days off, it was strictly ‘borrower time’. The concept was exactly as it sounded; Kaleb’s Saturdays and Sundays were spent tinkering away within the walls at his original size, going on the occasional borrowing trip (mostly out of habit than necessity), and if he really felt like it, travelling to the city’s aptly named interspecies zone with one of his upsized family members. As much as he loved attending school and blending in with human society, there was a deeper, almost visceral part of Kaleb that relished the moments he got to spend living unapologetically as a borrower.

Unfortunately though, this weekend was going to be different. As his phone’s alarm went off bright and early on Saturday morning, Kaleb groaned, dragging himself reluctantly out from under his mothers’ handmade quilt of fabric scraps and across the room to silence it. He braced himself on the side of his propped up phone for a minute, hiding a yawn behind the back of a hand and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes with the other. Bands of light streaked through the cracks in the wall that separated his cobbled-together living space from the human-sized apartment outside, illuminating hundreds of tiny, floating dust particles that no borrower could ever seem to escape from. Kaleb studied them intently for a minute, trying to distract himself from the overwhelming urge to flop back into bed.

There’s no time to sleep in, he reminded himself, because today, he had a mission. A very un-borrower-like mission that involved breaking his own rule.

In his meagre defence, Kaleb hadn’t expected Brooke to actually take him up on the offer to study together in his family’s apartment. In fact, if he were being honest, he’d made that comment in the spur of the moment to sound cool in front of his human neighbour. This brought him to his current predicament: Kaleb had lied about having human guests over. Well, at least guests Brooke’s age. The truth was, the only human who had ever stepped foot in the Finch residence was Evie, and for good reason.

This is gonna be a long day. He thought, staring longingly at his unmade bed one last time.

With a begrudging sigh, Kaleb forced himself into his morning routine. He pulled on a fresh pair of handmade clothes, ran his repurposed toothbrush through his unruly bedhead, and set out into the ‘hallway’ that led to his family’s main living area. His cloth shoes were silent against the dust-covered timber floor, which was really a support beam that ran horizontally from one side of the wall near his human bedroom to the open kitchen and living room area on the other. On a normal Saturday morning, Kaleb would take his time with the trip, admiring the infrastructure of the apartment walls from a perspective he was fairly sure not even the human architects who designed the place would ever experience. Today, that luxury was swept aside as he turned the corner and shimmied down a knotted line stapled to the connecting support beam. From there, he speed-walked the last few feet’s distance towards a door crafted from the sturdy plastic cover and spiral binding of an A6 sized notebook.

“Hey mom, dad? You there?” Kaleb called as he crossed the threshold, leaving his shoes on a mat at the door.

Having constant access to Upsize and by association the human world meant that the Finch household was more accessorised than most borrower dwellings. The floor was carpeted for starters, hence his mom’s strict no-shoes policy. Their kitchen and living room area had been purposely built parallel to the human-sized equivalent, which allowed Kaleb’s dad and uncle Rodney to construct a series of tubes and pipelines that provided water, electricity and gas. The kitchen itself boasted a functioning gas stove and range hood made from a small aluminium funnel that filtered the steam outside.

On the other side of the room was a walk-in pantry that housed a wide assortment of nuts, dried fruits and repurposed glass trinket bottles filled with pickled vegetables. There was a sprig of rosemary and a bay leaf almost as tall as Kaleb himself leant against one side of the doorframe, and a stick of cinnamon on the other. And, on the apartment’s kitchen counter that could be accessed through a door next to the pantry was his uncle Rodney’s most prized possession, a mini fridge meant to hold human cosmetics, that allowed the Finch family to do what most borrowers could never dream of—store their perishables.

Kaleb’s mom, dad, and twin sisters, who were seated at their popsicle stick dining table having breakfast, glanced up in surprise when he entered the room.

“Someone’s up early.” His mom remarked, looking over his shoulder at a leather watch pinned horizontally across the wall to check the time. She gestured for him to sit down in a spare seat before leaving her own chair to fetch him a plate and cutlery. Kaleb did so, fighting the urge to drool as he took in the plate of steaming dime-sized pancakes, syrup, and berry slices his mom had prepared in the centre of the table.

“Heh, yeah. Morning.” He greeted, thanking her as she handed him a simple plastic plate repurposed from a button, a copper wire fork, and a knife he was fairly sure had once belonged in a set of Cluedo. Kaleb wasted no time helping himself to a stack of pancakes, maple syrup, and a slice of strawberry, momentarily distracted from his reason for being up so early in the first place.

As if reading his mind, his mom continued. “It’s not like you to be up this early on a Saturday. How was work last night?”

“Same old.” He said around a mouthful of pancake. “They’re talking about letting me start working the drive through next month, which sounds kinda cool. Apparently the pay’s a bit better than flipping burgers.”

“Ooh, I wonder if you’ll get any pranksters.” Juno piped up eagerly from her seat at the other end of the table. “Y’know, like those people on TikTok!”

Kaleb smirked across at his sister. For their thirteenth birthday and in preparation to begin attending human school next year, Juno and Paige had been gifted their first ever mobile phone, or in other words, their gateway into the world of the internet. Since then, the pair of them had been chattering non-stop about all of the amusing things human influencers did to entertain their loyal fans on social media. “If I do, you’ll be the first one to hear about it.” He promised her, before turning back to his mom.

“Actually, I was hoping to ask for you and dad’s opinion on something.” Kaleb started, setting his knife and fork down as he mulled over his next words.

His parents both looked at each other, and then across at him with concern. “Sure, Kaleb. What’s wrong?” Asked his dad, leaning across the table to grab a wedge of blueberry.

“Well… nothing’s wrong, exactly. I just…” He squeezed his eyes shut, finding himself clamming up all over again. Why was it suddenly so hard to speak?

“Is this about apologising to that girl in your class?” His mom interrupted, lacing her fingers together. “Because if it is—"

“No, no, it’s not that.” He replied before she could continue with what was sure to be another lecture. “Well, I mean, it is, kind of…” Voice trailing off for the second time, Kaleb gritted his teeth in frustration and decided to just get it over with.

“How do you feel about me bringing someone from my class over to work on a project next week after school?” He blurted out.

Instantly, the mood around the dining table shifted. “Someone from your class… Wait, you mean a human?” His mom realised, an incredulous look plastering her face. “You want to have a human over? In our apartment?”

“Who?” His dad enquired, scratching his stubbled chin thoughtfully. “Is it someone you’ve told us about before?”

“Well, about that…” Kaleb began to fidget idly with his fork, preparing himself for the reaction his next words would almost certainly garner. “It’s actually Brooke Tucker. Y’know, from downstairs?”

“Brooke Tucker…” His mom was the first one to connect the dots. “Hold on, you mean the girl your teacher called me about… the exterminator’s daughter?” She looked positively aghast.

Meanwhile, from the other end of the table, his dad chuckled, amusement glinting in his hazel eyes. It was the perfect example of how he and Kaleb’s mom couldn’t be any more different when it came to handling situations involving humans. “I take it your apology was well received, then?”

His mom’s icy gaze shifted from Kaleb to her husband. “Hugo, this isn’t a joke.” She scolded, pointing her own wire fork across at him accusingly. “Don’t you see how risky that is, letting a human like that into our home? What if she notices something amiss, or worse, someone gets seen?”

“Margalo, dear, let’s think about this for a minute.” Kaleb’s dad cut her off from her fretting, well practiced in calming her anxious antics. “It’s not like Kaleb’s going to be giving her a private tour of the walls. I’m sure the two of them will just study together in the main room like I’d imagine any other human students would. Am I getting that right, Kaleb?”

“Pretty much.” Kaleb confirmed, endlessly grateful for his dad’s support.

His mom glanced helplessly from her husband, to Kaleb, and then back again. “I know, but that doesn’t eliminate the risk involved here.” She protested. “With that… man… for a father, that girl is probably more observant than your average human, and besides all that, I heard from Kaleb’s teacher that she brags about torturing borrowers in class. Why on earth would you want to bring someone like her into our home?”

“Yeah, about that.” Kaleb said, recalling his conversation with Brooke from the other night. “It’s a long story, but turns out, she actually made all of that stuff up to try and get me to leave her alone. I… I think I can trust her.”

Margalo Finch narrowed her eyes. “You think, or you know?”

Meanwhile, Kaleb’s dad was appraising him with that observant look of his that always seemed to peer deep into one’s soul. It was the same look he got when he was thinking of a new protagonist or plot-line for one of his novels. “She has no reason to suspect us, dear.” He finally said, addressing his dishevelled wife with the calmest voice he could muster. “Even if Kaleb did provoke this Brooke Tucker girl about her father’s…” he coughed “…line of work, that doesn’t mean she’s automatically going to assume there are borrowers living here. Besides, plenty of young humans are getting into borrower rights activism these days, and if she’s had a change of heart so quickly, then isn’t that a good thing? One less thing to worry about with Kaleb going to school, hmm?”

As he listened to his dad defending him, Kaleb felt a pang of guilt that both of his parents were blissfully unaware of how much Brooke already knew about their family secret. He’d thought about telling them what had happened; how he’d made the fatal error of running his mouth on the apartment roof that night and paid the ultimate price for it; how he’d escaped with Evie’s help and against his better judgement, confronted Brooke again the following night; how he was finally starting to see eye to eye with her, as rocky as that process was turning out to be. But he just couldn’t bring himself to do it, at least not yet. A part of him was afraid that if he did, he would never be allowed to attend human school or use Upsize again. That was a gamble Kaleb just wasn’t willing to make.

“I… I understand that, but why?” He was jolted from his thoughts by his mom, who stared across at him with an expression that was a mixture of confusion and defeat. “I’m proud of you for making things right with her, but I thought you couldn’t stand the girl.”

Kaleb let out an exasperated sigh. That question again. It was one he was still grappling with himself. Why was he making this much of an effort with Brooke? He decided to shelve that debate for the time being, instead casting his mind back to the conversation he’d had with his mom earlier that week. “It’s like you said, isn’t it?” He recalled. “That the humans own the world, and we just live in it. When I thought about it that way, I wanted to make more of an effort to see things from Brooke’s perspective, y’know, just like any other human would. I guess I figured if I do that,” Kaleb almost laughed at the absurdity of his next words, “then maybe we could even be friends someday.”

Kaleb wasn’t sure if it was the delivery of his conviction, or the fact that he’d used her own words against her, but he could see the fight leaving his mom’s pale blue eyes. She sighed, relenting. “Well… I suppose it’d be alright to have her over, so long as it’s just the one time.”

He breathed a sigh of relief. Well, that’s the first hurdle crossed. “Thanks, mom.”

“You’re actually gonna bring home a human then, Kaleb?” Juno exclaimed. “That is so-o-o dope!”

“Dope?” Their dad asked, bemused.

“Yeah!” The borrower teen declared proudly. “We’ve been practicing our slang for human school!”

Kaleb groaned, pinching his brow. “No one uses that word anymore, Juno.”

“But Damon said—”

“If you’re actually listening to Damon, then that’s your first mistake.”

“That’s what I said!” Paige piped up smugly from beside her twin, and Kaleb reached across the table to give her a first bump.

“Okay fine, I won’t say it again.” Juno relented, before quickly turning back to her older brother with an impish grin. “But still, Kaleb, are you sure you wanna have a girl over? Our apartment looks so povo.”

“Hmm… I’ve definitely heard that word get tossed around, but only by this one Australian kid in class.” Kaleb confirmed as he processed the rest of her remark. “You do have a point, though.” He straightened up in his seat. “That’s kind of the other reason I got up so early this morning.”

“Povo?” His mom repeated in confusion, to which Hugo Finch sighed.

“I believe our children are comparing the main apartment to something akin to squalor.”

“Well, I suppose we do have quite a bit of… extra furniture.” She surmised with a chuckle, starting to lose some of the tension she’d built up from before.

‘Extra furniture’ was a stretch. The truth of the matter was that by nature, everyone in the Finch family was a kleptomaniac. Kaleb had seen a few episodes of Hoarders on YouTube, so he knew their human-sized living space wasn’t overly messy per se, but the fact remained that the Finch apartment currently functioned as more of a storage space for its residents’ various trinkets and bits-and-bobs than a place you’d expect humans to be living in. After all, it wasn’t like most of the giant furniture they could have purchased to fill the rooms would ever be used in the way it was intended. In fact, the only reason the apartment contained things like an old table and chair in the living area and Kaleb’s springy mattress were for the human-sized borrowers to have somewhere to sit while they waited for their Upsize to wear off in the afternoons.

With that in mind, Kaleb revealed his next big proposal. “How about this,” he declared. “I have some money saved up. If you let me have Brooke over to study, I’ll turn the apartment into the most decked-out human condo you can imagine.”

Margalo eyed her youngest son skeptically. “That’s the first I’ve heard about these savings.” She pointed out. “Doesn’t most of your money go towards your Upsize?”

Kaleb cringed at the reminder of his current financial situation. “Well, yeah, but I have some left over.” He protested.

“Hmm,” was all his mom replied with as she mulled over the idea in her head.

His dad spoke up next. “It would be nice to add a little bit of charm to the place. Who knows, maybe if it were more inviting, I would spend more of my time writing out there instead of in my office.” After earning a raised eyebrow from his wife, he added, “It’s just a thought. I’m sure Evie would appreciate it, at the very least.”

Juno, meanwhile, looked positively ecstatic. “Yes! A home make-over! I’ve always wanted to do that, since I saw this interior design page online!” She exclaimed giddily, jumping out of her seat with her hands still planted on the table.

“Yeah, c’mon, mom.” Paige agreed. “You’ve gotta let Kaleb do it, our apartment will look so awesome at the end! We can even take those cool before-and-after shots like they do on Youtube.”

With bated breath, the four of them waited in suspense for Margalo Finch’s final verdict on the matter. At last, Kaleb’s mom spoke up, though not without first taking a long, thoughtful sip of her peppermint tea. “Just to be clear, whatever this ‘home make-over’ is going to involve, it’ll have to come out of your bank account.” She said sternly. “Your father and I are able to pay for your schooling, but that doesn’t mean we have the money to afford this, too. Remember, your Upsize delivery is tomorrow. It’s not going to be our fault if you have to miss a week of school because you ran out of money to pay for it.”

Kaleb nodded his understanding. Every second Sunday, he made the journey to the next suburb over, where for lack of a better term, he made the exchange of two-hundred-and-fifty dollars’ cash for his next package of the highly secretive size-changing pills. “Don’t worry about that. I’ve got it covered.” He assured her, which was only partially true. Satisfied with the way things had gone with his parents, Kaleb thanked them for breakfast and got up from his seat. “Well, I’d better get to it then. I’ve only got this weekend to pull this off.”

Before he could make his exit, Juno and Paige both leapt out of their own seats, flanking their older brother on either side. Juno looped her arm around Kaleb’s, gazing up at him with wide, pleading eyes. “Hey bro, if you let us take some of your Upsize, we can help out with the decorating?”

Kaleb hesitated, weighing up the idea in his head. Their offer wasn’t exactly surprising, all things considered. Ever since their dad had permitted them a trial run of Upsize earlier in the year, the Finch twins had been itching to venture out into the human world again. Kaleb couldn’t blame them. For him, experiencing life from a human’s perspective for the first time was like tasting a forbidden fruit. Once he’d seen everything the bustling city beyond the walls had to offer, the apartment building, despite being roughly the size of a city itself to a borrower, had never felt smaller.

“Well, I guess this would go a lot quicker if I had some extra help…” Kaleb started to reply, but paused, reminded of the abysmally empty plastic jar in his room where he kept his medication. “But I’m down to my last two pills, and I’ll need at least one and a half for myself…”

As though reading his mind, his dad chimed in. “Don’t worry about that. I’ll go collect your delivery tomorrow for you if your sisters want to help out.” He gave the twins a pointed look. “It’ll do them good to take a break from technology for the day.” In a lower voice, he added. “That’s all they seem to talk about anymore.”

Kaleb nodded gratefully, before turning his attention back to Juno and Paige and their identical gleeful expressions. “Okay, but that still means I only have enough Upsize left for one extra person, and only for half a day. You’ll have to do rock paper scissors on it.”

The borrower family watched in amusement as its two youngest members played best of three. A moment later, and Juno let out a triumphant cry. “I win!”

Paige folded her arms and stuck out her bottom lip in a pout. “Fine. But you better let me tag along, too, okay?”

“Okay!” Juno looked relieved that her twin wasn’t mad. “I’ll even wear the overalls Damon bought me with the big pocket on the front, so you can see everything!”

Kaleb had taken to leaning against the doorframe with his arms folded, smiling at their conversation. “Well this is new.” He joked. “I was starting to think I’d need to butt in, but it sounds like you’ve already sorted things out.”

“Ohshut up, Kaleb. We’re not twelve anymore.” Paige snapped indignantly. “I can take the loss this time.”

He raised an eyebrow. No, but you’re barely a year older than that.

“Anyway, Mr. big shot.” Juno continued, hands on her hips. “Forget the Upsize. Do you really have enough money to buy all that human furniture?”

“Well, no.” He admitted, before shooting them a coy smirk, the irony in what he was about to say not lost on any of them. “It looks like we’ll just have to borrow some things along the way…”

****

While Kaleb and his sisters worked tirelessly from morning till night on their DIY apartment makeover, Brooke’s weekend was shaping up to be as dull as ever. She spent her Saturday locked away in her room, humming along to the latest Five Seconds of Summer album through her AirPods as she scrolled away aimlessly at social media. She wasn’t really paying attention to her phone, though. As she lay there with only her thoughts to entertain her, Brooke couldn’t help but mull over the events of the last week, and the many encounters she’d had with her classmate-turned borrower whose family happened to live on the third floor.

It still felt surreal to look back on it all. So much had changed in such a short time; about the way Brooke viewed society, about the way she viewed borrowers, about the way she viewed Kaleb Finch. It was a lot to process, and she still wasn’t sure how she felt about it. A part of her still wished she could go back in time and stop herself from going up to the rooftop that night, if nothing else but to prevent the torrent or emotions—the confusion, the guilt, and everything in between—that followed.

Even so, Brooke would be lying to herself at this point if she said she wasn’t at least a little curious about the secret life of her upstairs neighbour.

Bored as she was, the human girl couldn’t help but wonder what Kaleb was doing at that time. Would he be out and about exploring town? Considering his poorly concealed fascination with anything human-made, she could definitely picture that being the case. Or maybe he was hanging out in his own bedroom in the walls; a sight Brooke still hadn’t managed to rid from her mind after getting a glimpse of it during their video call last night.

Or maybe… she glanced lazily up at the ceiling, studying the grate of the air vent in the corner, half expecting to see a pair of much smaller eyes staring back at her from the other side. Maybe he was passing his time stalking her again, waiting for the perfect opportunity to sneak out from within the walls. She found herself scanning the room almost involuntarily, studying every nook and cranny that a borrower could possibly conceal themselves in. She felt her phone slip out of her hand as her heart filled with strange sense of… was it yearning? Curiosity? The thought alone made the human girl shudder in discomfort.

Did she… want to see him again? Brooke was struggling to deny it at this point, especially after last night. Weird as their conversation had been, it had unlocked a part of her that she thought had been buried long ago. Maybe she was lonely after all; lonely enough that even the company of her former bully was preferable to returning to the way things were. After all, the alternative couldn’t be true, could it? She couldn’t have really been enjoying spending time with Kaleb… right?

Stop thinking about him! Brooke’s thoughts screamed, bringing her internal monologue to a screeching halt. You’re not that desperate, Brooke. Get it together! The human girl would have slapped herself again had she not been paranoid about the footage somehow making its way onto the landlady’s security camera feed. With renewed determination, Brooke snatched up her phone and flopped over onto her stomach in bed, opening up her Netflix account. If binge watching the latest season of Stranger Things couldn’t distract her from thinking about her borrower neighbour, she didn’t know what would.

****

It was at exactly three thirty-five on Sunday afternoon when Brooke realised that ignoring Kaleb’s existence would be easier said than done. After a night spent glued to her phone screen like the teenager that she was, Brooke had committed to watching the last few episodes of the season on her laptop while she simultaneously updated her Spotify playlist with 80’s songs from the show’s latest soundtrack. Just as the credits rolled after the final cliffhanger, Brooke’s reeling thoughts were interrupted by an email notification in the corner of her screen. Still in the midst of processing the show’s ending scene, she clicked on it, raising an eyebrow at the sight of the subject line: Integration Day.It was sent by Mr. Bell, her history and home room teacher, and Brooke immediately felt all of her concerns about Stranger Things drift away as she read the message.

Dear Students,

I hope you have all had a relaxing weekend.

I am emailing in regards to an initiative the school is putting forward in an effort to promote borrower inclusion into the human education system. Beginning this week, the first Friday of every month will be Integration Day, during which we will be inviting those students living with borrower tenants aged 13 to 20 to have them participate in classes.

If you would like to be involved in this initiative, I have attached a consent form below. In order to be considered, the form must be completed and signed by both your parents or guardians, as well as the parents or guardians of the borrowers wishing to attend school as part of the program.

More information regarding the initiative will be announced in home class tomorrow morning.

I look forward to seeing you all then.

Yours sincerely,

Mr Bell

Brooke closed her laptop abruptly, frowning as she took a minute to process the information. This was a surprise. Of all the things she expected her teacher to agree to host, a borrower education scheme certainly wasn’t one of them. It was almost funny, she thought. Had Brooke received that email even a week earlier, she probably would have had a very different reaction to the one she was experiencing now. She imagined herself fuming in front of the laptop screen, cursing at the borrower race that seemed to find every possible way to make her life miserable. Hell, that part of her was still there, in some way. Mostly though, Brooke felt… indifferent about it all. She wasn’t as angry as she probably should’ve been—would’ve been. Instead… Yep, there it was again.

Brooke couldn’t help but wonder how Kaleb felt about the Integration Day announcement.

Running her fingers down her face in exasperation, the human girl decided it was as good a time as any to get some fresh air, if anything to put some distance between herself and… whatever thoughts her head kept conjuring. So, she got up out of bed, tugged on her pair of well-worn doc martens without bothering to properly do up the laces, and set off into the neighbourhood, bidding her parents a brief goodbye on her way out.

The street was quiet, save for a group of teenagers riding skateboards and laughing amongst themselves out the front of the local diner. Brooke tore her eyes away from the familiar green plaque emblazoned with the letter ‘B’ hanging in its window. Surprising (and frankly, unsanitary) as it was that borrowers were allowed in a burger joint of all places, she didn’t want to think about that right now. Trusty earbuds in, Brooke trudged along the sidewalk, letting the world fall away for a moment as she listened to the comforting riff of a punk rock song.

Eventually, hunger won against out against her mindless wandering, and she stopped by the bakery to grab a ham and salad sandwich on her way back to the apartment. Before long, Brooke found herself sitting against the railing on the rooftop to watch the sunset, absentmindedly nibbling at her late lunch as she took in the pink and orange hues of the sky.

“Damn, am I gonna have to find a new place to do my evening brooding?” A familiar voice piped up, as if on cue, and the human girl barely refrained from cringing at the sound.

So much for avoiding him. The nagging voice in the back of her mind taunted. It’s almost like you were hoping he’d be here—

Brooke swallowed down those thoughts, as well as her mouthful of sandwich, hard. Trying to compose herself, she tilted her head in the direction of the voice, eyes widening momentarily in surprise to find Kaleb standing at the top of the staircase a few feet away at his borrower size. He was learning casually against the cement wall with his arms folded, a halfway smile on his face that the human girl could barely make out from this distance. She noticed with interest that he was decked out in what she was coming to label his ‘borrowing outfit’ again; tiny black fingerless gloves, a cropped brown jacket and beige undershirt, khaki pants and what looked to be a brand new set of (barf) rat leather boots. A coil of string attached to a fishhook hung from a loop in his belt, and that ratty looking satchel of his was strung across his body, looking somewhat bulkier than usual.

Realising she was staring, Brooke coughed. “Yeah, sorry, there really isn’t enough space up here for two.” She quipped, gesturing to his smaller form with her sandwich. “Even when you’re… like this.” That raised another question. “Why are you small, anyway?” Brooke’s trademark nonchalant attitude returned in full force like the trusty emotional shield it was. “Surely there’s something productive you could’ve been doing today.”

She could have sworn he gave a tiny eye roll at her comment. “Speak for yourself.” Kaleb scoffed, stepping out towards her so he didn’t have to speak so loudly. “And I don’t have to be human-sized to be productive, geeze.” There was a pause. “To answer your question, though, I’m waiting for a package. The company that… organises my Upsize comes every Sunday afternoon with a delivery. Since I ran out early though, dad’s gone to get it for me.”

“That doesn’t sound sketchy at all.” Brooke smirked.

A flutter of wings caught her attention, and she watched as a pigeon landed a few metres away, head tilting curiously at her food. Out of the corner of her eye, Brooke didn’t fail to notice Kaleb already taking a few cautious steps backwards, towards the top of the staircase. With a cheeky grin, she tore a piece of bread from her sandwich and tossed it directly in front of the borrower’s escape route.

Less than a second passed before chaos ensued. Pigeons descended from the sky to fight over the crumbs, and Kaleb let out a startled yell, falling unceremoniously onto his backside with his arms held protectively over his head.

“W-What the hell, Brooke?” He cried, scrambling to a stand and slowly edging towards the shadow of her torso. He looked up at her indignantly with his tiny arms folded. At his size, the sight was almost cute, though she would sooner die than admit that to him out loud. “Are you trying to kill me?”

“Relax, they’re just pigeons!” Brooke’s grin widened. “C’mon, don’t you guys train them as pets and shit?”

“You try training a wild animal twice your size, see how well that works out for you.” He grumbled back, thoroughly unamused.

Brooke smirked, stuffing the last of her sandwich into her mouth. As the pigeons, realising there was no longer food on offer, finally dispersed, Kaleb sighed irritably and took a seat about half a meter away from her, one knee drawn up to his chest. Chewing thoughtfully, she noted the uncharacteristic slump in his tiny shoulders. The human girl had an inkling as to why that might be.

Following her hunch, she spoke up. “I take it you got the email then? About—”

“Yeah, I got the email.” He interrupted, kicking a minuscule speck of rubble with his shoe. With how close he was sitting to the railing, it sailed right over the edge of the roof, and Brooke was once again left to wonder how Kaleb was able to sit so calmly before a relative five-hundred foot drop without losing his nerve. A Borrower’s tolerance to heights was no joke.

“So?” She pressed, adopting a cheshire cat’s grin. Reaching out, she poked him in the side with a finger. “Want me to take you with me to class on Friday? I think everyone would get a kick out of it, especially Amy Snyder.”

Kaleb swayed where he sat, not even looking up at her. His gaze remained focused on the city view ahead of them, as the sun dipped further into the horizon. “You’re not funny, y’know.”

“Really? I thought it was plenty funny.”

“Can’t you take a hint?” he snapped, irritation plain on his tiny face as he finally turned to glare up at her. “I’m not in the mood for your stupid human jokes right now.”

She leaned back on her elbows on the uneven concrete floor, looking down at him tauntingly. “Clearly. I’m confused, though. Isn’t integration what you lot were pushing for in the first place? I would’ve thought you’d be happier than this.”

Kaleb grit his teeth. “You call bring-your-borrower-to-class Friday ‘integration’? This whole thing is just a publicity stunt, to boost Westmount’s reputation as a ‘diverse learning environment’.” The borrower shuddered. “Tch. I can already see the headline.”

“Well, at least they’re making an effort, right?” Brooke pointed out. “That’s more than you can say about other high schools.”

“The whole point of borrowers attending human school should be to learn. This is more like show-and-tell than anything.” Kaleb shook his head stubbornly, hands clenching around the strap of his bag. “Nope.” He decided. “I don’t want anything to do with it.”

Brooke stared at him for a moment, his five-inch-tall form silhouetted by the glare of the setting sun. A question was nagging at her mind again, one that had been stewing there since her heated debate with him on the same rooftop just the other night. She tilted her head to the side. “Kaleb, why do you hate humans so much?”

He looked back at her, caught off guard for a moment as the question sank in. “I—”

“Kaleb? You up here?” A distinctly male voice called out suddenly, and the echo of human footsteps could be heard traipsing up the stairs. As if he’d stepped on a live wire, Kaleb was on his feet in an instant, his face losing several shades of colour.

“Shit, that’s my dad.” He announced in a panic, flashing her a jaunty salute. “Gotta go!”

“Your—what?” That was all the warning Brooke got before the borrower took off at full speed towards what was no doubt a secret pathway behind the stairwell. The human girl sat, blinking in shock at how quickly Kaleb had made his escape, just as the sound of a man clearing his throat behind her reached her ears.

Brooke wasn’t sure what she was expecting when she took in the sight of who she could only assume was Kaleb’s upsized father as he stood at the entrance to the rooftop. “Um, good evening.” He began, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly as he greeted her. “Sorry, I didn’t realise anyone would be up here at this hour.” He warbled. Brooke hadn’t failed to notice the way his hazel eyes darted across the roof as he spoke, no doubt checking for any sign of his currently much smaller son. Frowning faintly, he returned his gaze towards her. “I’m looking for a borro— I mean, a boy around your age. He always comes up here to watch the sunset, you see.”

Brooke almost snorted at his ramblings. That was definitely a trait Kaleb had inherited. Everything else about him, though, was not at all how she’d imagined the borrower man to look like. For starters, he was lean and wiry, even more so than Kaleb, with shoulder-length brown hair tied in a messy bun at the back, showing only the slightest hints of greying. His skin was a deep olive colour, almost sun-kissed, as though the man had spent more of his life outdoors than in. His body was littered with faded scars, one particularly gruesome one on his leg that looked almost like an animal bite, and another jagged line across his forehead, cutting through one of his eyebrows. He even had his right ear pierced with two simple black studs, making him look less like an author and more like a seasoned warrior from a video game.

What surprised Brooke most about the man though was the sleeve of tattoos running up almost the entire length of his left arm. At a glance, she could make out the realistic designs of what looked to be a field mouse with its teeth bared against an opposing finch, surrounded by strange symbols completely foreign to her human eyes but looking suspiciously like the borrower equivalent of gang signs. That and the fact that the mysterious man in question was unapologetically wearing a t-shirt that said ‘World’s Greatest Farter (Father)’, boxer shorts, and fluffy slippers left Brooke’s mind completely blown.

Realising he was waiting for a reply, the human girl forced herself to speak. “I haven’t seen anyone, sorry.” She spluttered. You owe me, Kaleb.

“Oh, well, that’s alright. I’m sure he’ll turn up eventually.” Kaleb’s father responded, hesitating as he stared her down with almost the same intensity as she had just done with him. “Actually, I don’t believe I’ve seen your face around here before.”

“Probably not.” She replied glibly. Brooke for one had certainly never seen the man before, otherwise she might have done a better job hiding her bewilderment. As it was, she was still trying to wrap her head around the fact that borrowers could have tattoos of all things. Shutting down that particular train of thought, the human girl focused back on the conversation at hand. “My family and I just moved in the other day.” She continued, standing up and nodding in his direction. “I’m Brooke.”

Instantly, recognition flashed in the man’s hazel eyes, and he beamed across at her, closing the gap between them and holding out his hand. “Oh! You must be Brooke Tucker. Our new downstairs neighbour. You know of my son, then—Kaleb.” He cleared his throat a second time as he introduced himself. “My name is Hugo. Hugo Finch. My family and I live in apartment thirty-five.”

“Nice to meet you.” She answered, awkwardly shaking his hand and trying not to think about how at his normal size, she would be able to fit her own hand around his entire body. “And yeah. He’s in my class.”

“Yes, he’s told us a lot about you.” Hugo said with a nod, making the human girl’s eyebrows raise in surprise.

“Really?” Brooke gave the upsized borrower her most innocent smile. “All good things, I hope.”

“Oh, of course.” He said without missing a beat. “He tells me the two of you are working on a project together for modern history at the moment. It’s nice to see him making some new friends at school.”

Brooke winced at that. “I wouldn’t exactly call us friends.” She said, dancing around that particular topic. “But yeah, we’re getting there with the presentation. It helps that we live in the same building, too. Definitely makes it easier to get our research done.” She forced out a chuckle.

“I’ll bet it does.” Hugo agreed pleasantly, seemingly oblivious to her awkwardness. “I hear you’ll be visiting our apartment after school this week for a study session, too. Sounds like the two of you will be finished before you know it at this rate.”

Brooke smirked at the indirect mention that Kaleb had apparently asked his parents if he could have her over to study. Cute. “Yeah, seems like it. It’ll be good to get it done early, I guess.”

“You’ll love what he’s done with the place, too.” Hugo continued, his expression full of pride as he spoke about his son. “It was a mess before, but he and his sisters really stepped up this weekend to clean it up.” He gestured to his blatantly stay-at-home attire. “I even tested out the space for my work today, as you can probably tell. Before, I was renting out another… office because of the clutter, but I can definitely see the appeal of working from home now…” He trailed off with a chuckle, paying no mind to the human girl in front of him as she struggled to process this new information.

“I didn’t realise Kaleb was… redecorating.” Brooke said slowly, not sure whether to be amused or unsettled. She felt herself fidgeting uncomfortably with the inner seams of her hoodie as she recalled her conversation with the borrower in question last night, and how she’d jokingly suggested taking him up on his offer to have her over to his place. Surely Kaleb hadn’t spent the entire weekend cleaning out his family’s apartment just for them to study in… right? There was no way that could be true. She felt her cheeks redden at the mere thought.

Brooke was jolted back to the present when Hugo gave a breezy laugh, looking almost as uncomfortable as she did. The man wrung his hands, his expression reminding her vaguely of a deer caught in the headlights. If Brooke didn’t know any better, he’d just told her something he wasn’t supposed to. “R-Right, well, I’m sure he’ll tell you all about that at school tomorrow.” He warbled, glancing down at his wristwatch. “Speaking of Kaleb… if you’ll excuse me, I really should be getting back to tracking him down. It was nice talking to you, Brooke. I’m sure I’ll be seeing you around.”

Before Brooke could string together a reply, he’d darted back down the stairs almost as quickly as Kaleb had fled the rooftop not even ten minutes earlier. All the human girl could do was stare, hand raised in a wave that had come far too late.

“Yeah. Nice meeting you too…” She muttered to the empty rooftop, as the breeze whistled through her hair and night finally settled in.

Brooke was beginning to wonder if it was a borrower custom to run off mid-conversation. With how much she’d already learned about humankind’s smaller counterparts and their strange and secret culture in the past week, she didn’t think anything would surprise her at this point. Yet she still wanted to know more, a desire that both scared and excited her. She wanted to know more about Kaleb’s world, just like he wanted someone to share it with. Her heart just wasn’t ready to admit that yet.

For now, the human girl settled back into the blissful ignorance she was used to. She sat down heavily with her back up against the railing, and turned her music back on.

“My life is so weird.” Brooke sighed up at the stars.

#g/t community #g/t writing #borrowed courage #kaleb and brooke #sizechange #sizeshifter #the borrowers #tinypeople #gianttiny #borrowerau #angst #shrinking #sfw

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sunkissedscribbles · 2 months

Text

Prejudiced - Chapter Five

this is only a part of the series, the previous and next chapters can be found here

a/n: i had so much fun writing this with all the internal struggle cassie’s facing currently, and with what happens at the end of chapter xx

word count: 5903

tw: mention of sex (i think it’s going to be a constant warning from now on), swearing?? (that one too), use of alcohol, mention of drugs, skipping meals

summary: drifting away and bottling feelings up takes a toll on cassie and starts to shut down

<previous chapter

dividers by @chachachannah

The next day, being the first day of lessons and a Friday, I'm sitting with Ki, Enzo, Theo, and Mattheo at the Slytherin table, eating breakfast. I'd lie if I said I didn't miss Hogwarts' food.

"Miss Black," I hear McGonagall's voice from behind and I turn to look at her. "Some habits never change, do they?" she points out how I'm sitting at the Slytherin table again as she hands me my timetable. Her facial expressions aren't bitter because of it like my housemates'. I think she's just glad the rivalry isn't a hundred percent true.

After thanking her for handing me my timetable I look at the paper in my grip.

"What do you have today?" Ki peeks over my shoulder and answers herself as her gaze scans through my timetable: free period, Herbology, DADA, free period. I finish early on Fridays, I state to myself relievedly. "DADA. With that creepy-eyed old man?"

I must let out a short chuckle at her declaration.

"Some habits should change," exclaims a voice behind us, in a tone of boredom. I swear McGonagall and Snape share a brain. I mutter the professor a 'good morning,' then he places the timetable in front of Kiara next to me. "Your timetable, Miss Bianchi." He then hands the timetables to the boys as well.

"Thank you, professor," Kiara says clearly, with the most charming smile she could ever put on, Snape then turns away with a dull and strict expression.

This man takes away the leftover will I have to live, honestly.

"The only reason I was willing to come back to Hogwarts," Ki exclaims in a lovey-dovey tone and a matching gaze that makes me want to vomit. I share a look with the boys – they think the same.

I slide our timetables next to each other on the table, observing them both to know what classes we have together.

"I needn't get up," Ki grunts when pointing at the free period today: it's free for the both of us. What's more, she's got a free second period with the boys as well while I'm having Herbology. This means I'm not going to have any Herbology lessons with the Slytherins this year. Which means...

"Oh, I'm fucked," I let out a big, troubled sigh, to which Kiara looks at me with a questioning expression, the boys also peering over the table and Enzo over my shoulder. I just point at Friday's second period. She lets out a laugh and nudges me with her elbow, the others looking for some sort of explanation.

"You won't have Flower-boy helping you during lessons, huh?"

"Fuck off, I'm gonna fail this year."

To that, she just shakes her head and waves me off. She knows I won't fail. I do too.

"I'll just help in the afternoons," Enzo murmurs to me with a sweet smile, still leaning over my shoulder and I mutter him a thank you in response.

Enzo and I have studied a lot in the greenhouses over the years, just sitting on the floor. Well, I've been the one studying and he was the one who's been talking all the time, about flowers and herbs, of course. But I've always loved listening to him and hearing what this or that flower means when given to someone and which herb you could make Wolfsbane Potion out of, for example. He's always had an interesting way of explaining things I had no clue about — no wonder I passed with an E every year in Herbology.

Today, we were here to celebrate our birthdays. I mean, neither of us celebrates their birthday today or this week; both of us were born in August but we couldn't manage to meet up during summer so we had to be creative.

I got him a book about magical flowers, his favourite sweets, I baked his favourite cookies with a little bit of help from the house elves in the kitchen, and gave him a framed picture of us. In the picture, we are seen last school year. It was taken by Ki on a winter Hogsmeade Saturday in the record store. The picture is moving, thanks to magic, capturing perfectly how we are dancing to the music. Although it can't be heard in the picture, I remember we were dancing to 'Crocodile Rock' by Elton John, which is one of his favourite muggle songs.

I step into my dorm room, finding Ki on my bed, messing with my guitar.

"When I said 'you can come anytime,' I didn't exactly mean when I'm not here," I set my bag down next to my desk, smiling lightly at the girl.

"Flower," she points at me with a frown. "Who got you... it was Enzo, wasn't he?" she smirks as I'm hanging the yellow chrysanthemum up upside down to dry it. I just nod, feeling a little bit bad and guilty. "Why the face?"

To that, I pull the necklace out from under my shirt. She gestures to me to come over to her — she wouldn't get up even if there was an earthquake.

For my birthday, Enzo got me that beautiful chrysanthemum and a silver necklace in the shape of the constellation Cassiopeia with a small sun-shaped charm hanging on the left side of the constellation, basically by her feet as she is depicted horizontally.

"Pretty. Why the face?" she looks up into my eyes, my guitar in her hands, still, resting on her thighs as she repeats the question.

"Because it's silver. Silver. Pure silver — you know how much that costs?" I start walking up and down in the room, practically freaking out because of guilt.

"Cass, you do realize you could easily buy that too, don't you?"

"I know! I know I could but you know what I got him? Biscuits! And a book and a picture! And that's it! And he got me a silver necklace and that gorgeous flower!" I run a frustrated hand through my hair. "What, now I should buy him a Swatch? This boy is insane!"

"No, he's just rich. And so are you. And so am I, what about it? You could just buy him, what, Honeydukes," Ki shakes her head, clearly not understanding my problem. "The whole shop, I mean."

"No, Ki. I know I have some money but that's not the point. He got me all these and I got him stupid little things. A bloody picture is what I gave him!"

"I took that 'bloody picture,' show some respect," she points at me with raised eyebrows, offended by the adjective I used.

"Right. But he got me expensive jewellery," I sigh, looking at the necklace through the mirror.

"Yeah, the boy's head over hells for you."

"That's heels," I correct her, admiring the silver guiltily.

"I prefer hell so it stays that," she shrugs as she starts strumming the intro of 'Highway To Hell' on the guitar, making me laugh.

I shake my head, looking back at her, the charm between my fingers, "How do I thank him for this?"

"Wear it. And let him shag you. You like the necklace?" she asks and I nod, rolling my eyes at her comment about having sex with Enzo. I walk over to my bed and drop myself down onto my back.

Enzo knows how much of an obsession I have with astronomy and names; he thought it would be the perfect gift for me as Cassiopeia is my first name, as it's clear from the constellation hanging in my neck. And my middle name is Apollonia, meaning 'belonging to Apollo,' the Greek god of music, poetry, archery, and the sun — that's why the sun charm by Casiopeia's feet.

Ki gets up from my bed, taking my guitar as if it was hers. She stops by the door when she's already opened it, looking at me, "Don't forget 'bout tonight," then, making sure I nod, she closes the door, disappearing behind it and I stay there in my room, alone with my thoughts.

I promised her to attend the party later in the Slytherin common room; the first one of the year.

Slytherin parties have always been of the kind you see on TV. Drugs from the Hufflepuff students, the common room smelling of that and cigarettes, alcohol, and sweat, people dancing to the music, making out either in the crowd or in a secluded corner, or shagging elsewhere, locked away in the dorms. And if you weren't a Slytherin student, you must befriend one for invitation, and to be given the password.

This is my first time attending one of these, actually, but not my first time being in the Slytherin common room. I've never been much for drinking, which people would consider me dull and a prude for. But for Merlin's balls, I'm barely fifteen. I walk past a few students, then get myself a plastic cup of whatever alcohol gets in my reach before I make my way to my group of friends.

I plop down onto the armrest of the couch next to Ki who's sitting on the couch itself. It's only Ki and Theo yet, Enzo and Mattheo are nowhere to be seen.

"Thought at least you'd dress up," Theo smirks with a suggestive, cocky grin and I roll my eyes.

"I'm not dressing up for you," I raise my cup to my mouth.

"C'mon, would it really hurt giving up on this tomboyish shit for one night?" he nudges me.

"Would it hurt not to try and take your friends to bed?" I snap at Theo annoyedly. It's not that I don't want to give up on this 'tomboyish shit.' Wearing these rather large and loose clothes simply feels nice, I don't have to worry about my body and don't have to sit with my arms covering all the body parts I'm insecure about.

I then look at Ki when I feel the girl tugging on the sleeve of my t-shirt. She's sitting next to me in a pair of sweats and a big T-shirt — she's never been one to wear at least jeans and probably never will be either. The look on her face tells me more than words would ever do and I almost know what she's thinking.

Ki turns back to face Theo and in an instant, she pulls her shirt up just enough to reveal her boobs to the boy's eyes, earning a gobsmacked look from Theo that's replaced by a mischievous grin in no time. And the ones surrounding us? They cheer and whistle at her, getting a furious look from me that screams 'Look at her like that and say goodbye to your nuts' in return.

"Want me to taste them?" a boy from behind the couch Theo's sitting on, who's a year ahead of us, Adrian Pucey, says with a devilish grin. But all his comment does is earn Pucey a punch in his face by a furious Theodore Nott flying over the backrest of the couch before Ki could even respond.

The students nearby all gather around us and Ki and I jump up from the couch too to see Theo and Pucey wrestle on the floor, accompanied by the sounds of the boys' insults, huffs, grunts, and finally, the sound of Pucey's nose breaking. In the meanwhile, nobody is doing anything besides yelling encouraging words at the boys to kill one another.

"What's happening?" I feel Mattheo's warm, alcoholic breath on my neck as the boy is trying to yell louder than the crowd around us.

I can barely even process the information myself as we are still only watching the boys but by the time I realize someone should do something about the boys on the ground, Theo is already up on his feet with bloody knuckles and a bruised face.

"Ki's flashed Theo and Pucey made a comment about her boobs, so Theo punched him," I explain briefly to Mattheo, looking into those deep brown eyes while Kiara is talking to Theo in an irritated tone about how she could've defended herself.

"And now they're going to bed," Matt points in our friends' direction but by the time I look there I can only see their backs turned to us, both gesturing fiercely to the other while Theo's pulling Ki furiously into the direction of the dorms to continue their argument there. Witnessing their arguments I never know if they'll end up throwing punches or snogging. "Bet they'll get together."

I shake my head, the both of us still looking in the direction where they've just gone, "Just sex."

"Three galleons," he turns to me with a vigorous grin and his hand stretched out for a shake.

"I'm in," I shake his hand with a smirk after a few seconds of thinking.

Mattheo gets asked by a Slytherin girl to dance, so I'm just standing there with the cup of alcohol in my grip, leaning against a wall, and watching the scene in front of me escalate. The girl in question is Daphne Greengrass from a year below us. I can't help but feel jealousy arise in me as I watch her shiny, straight blonde hair and that pretty face on which not a single pimple ever shows up. Not to mention her slender figure and how her body's just starting to be more feminine but how mature she already looks — of course, my friend said yes to a dance. He'd have been stupid not to. She's the type to make me want to turn invisible or bury myself alive in shame as my insecurities take over me. Feeling small and left out now that Mattheo's having a dance with that gorgeous girl, Ki and Theo doing Merlin-only-knows-what behind closed doors (I have a few guesses), and how Enzo's never showed up, embarrassment and an uncomfortable feeling grow on me, telling me to back away and head to my dorm instead.

The next morning, I'm just playing with my scrambled eggs at the table, opposite Mattheo and Enzo, Theo on my right. They are talking about something, but I'm so zoned out that I can't even make out what it's all about.

"Cass," Theo pokes my side and I jump away about half a metre at the impulse. It took me by surprise and there are no girls who like to be poked in the side and no one can tell me otherwise. "You quiet."

"I'm fine," I shrug as I put my fork down. I don't want to talk about anything right now. "Where's Ki?"

For one, she is a lazy person and despises waking up, that's for sure. But she's never late. It's been ten minutes since she should've shown up.

"And why should I know that?" Theo raises his brows, to which Mattheo and Enzo share a look.

Enzo didn't show up at the party yesterday and I left shortly after Mattheo didn't come back from that dance with Daphne after minutes that seemed long and lonely hours to me, and Theo, well, he went away to argue with Kiara. And I felt left out, that's why I left instead.

Without an answer or any further explanation, I get up from the table and walk down to the Dungeons and into Ki's dorm room through the Slytherin common room.

"You up?" I open the door without knocking and make my way over to the bed.

"Let me die," she groans, and I can't help the little smile crossing my lips.

"Not today. You have to get up."

"I can't."

"Yes, you can," I sit down on the edge of the bed and run a hand through her hair as a form of encouragement.

"Can't."

"C'mon, get up."

"But I can't," she whines, looking up at me with desperation in her eyes.

"Yes, you can. Or what, you got shagged?" I tease her. We've been through this little back-and-forth a few times before.

Silence.

This is enough proof for me and my eyes widen at the revelation. Who- Theodore Nott, who else?

"You and Theo?" I ask finally, after a few seconds of silence and she nods.

Suddenly a weird feeling washes over me. It's something I can't really explain, something I can't depict with words just yet. Just knowing she's done it... I feel old, all of a sudden. It's so weird. No, I'm weird.

"But it's casual," she shakes her head and sits up cursing as to why her muscles are so sore and I can't fight back an amused chuckle, although my eyes still aren't very sincere.

It takes some time and a few encouraging words but I persuade her to get up and we make our way up to the Great Hall. The boys aren't there by the time we sit down. They hate waiting, of course, they ate their breakfast and went their own way.

"Aren't you eating?" Kiara snaps me out of my thoughts as she's eating her cold cuts.

"Ate already," I shake my head with a faint smile as I lie, the scrambled eggs I put on my plate are still there, untouched, a few seats away. I just can't wrap my mind around how she and Theo have had sex. I mean, I know I made that stupid bet yesterday. But I didn't mean it a slight bit. At least not yet. Why am I still thinking about it? It's not even my business.

Trying not to fall behind immediately on the first week, I'm studying in the library with headphones on, when Kiara and Enzo sit down across me at my table. They've been out, Ki and Theo haven't talked all day and Enzo and Mattheo seem to have fallen out a bit these days, only interacting when necessary.

They seem to have bumped into Professor Moody, judging by Kiara's next sentence.

"This man's a creep," exclaims Ki which Enzo's traumatized expression only confirms as he slumps on the chair. "And that eye — I swear it has x-ray function."

Looking up from my book, I just nod with an unreadable expression. I agree with them about how weird Moody is, but I say nothing. Ki looks at me, concerned.

"Why so quiet?"

"I swear you and Theo are the same," I refer to the boy pointing out I was quiet at breakfast in a tired voice. She frowns and Enzo furrows his brows.

"Cass-" he'd start but I shake my head.

"I'm fine. Just tired, is all," I run a hand through my hair.

That's not true, though. I mean, yes, I'm tired. I always am. But I'm just not in the mood for socializing, not up for any company today. Not at all up for their company today, even if they are my best friends. Maybe I'm just selfish, maybe it is wrong to feel this way, but I can't help it; jealousy and a sense of betrayal creep upon me. There's also this thought in my head all day, about running out of time. Not having been kissed yet, not ever having been drunk, not one fag smoked — all my friends have done either some or all of these and even more. Not that I couldn't do it, but shouldn't my first kiss be, well, special? With someone I truly love. Or maybe I'm naive for still believeing in true love.

"I think I'll take a nap," I stand up from my chair and pack my things into my backpack.

"What's up with her?" I hear Enzo ask Ki quietly as I'm walking in the direction of the door.

"No idea," Ki sighs with concern in her voice.

Late at night, I'm sitting by the window with my notebook laid up against my thighs as I'm writing into it, head laid against the cool glass of the window sideways as I'm listening to the storm outside, watching the lightning when I hear an urgent knock on my door. Getting shaken out of my thoughts, I look up with a frown. I don't know if I have really heard that or if I'm just hallucinating. The line of short knocks is repeated and I get up from my sitting and walk over to the door that reveals a trembling, sweating Mattheo.

"Matt-"

"Can I come in?" he asks in a shaky voice, on the verge of crying, and I nod and step away from the door to let him in.

"What happened?" I ask in a concerned, worried tone as I watch him pace back and forth in my room with that same scared look on his face that I used to have as a kid when I always ran to my mum's room after I'd had a nightmare. The memories of these nights are still living rent-free in my head; telling my mother I have had a nightmare and her comforting me, telling me it'll be alright, telling me no one wants to hurt me.

"I-I had a nightmare," the answer echoes in the quiet of the night my room holds. I reach my hand out for him, my instincts kicking in; he's just a boy, breaking down in front of me- no, he's my friend who's come to me for support. And my heart's breaking that I'm seeing him like this.

"C'mere." Mattheo doesn't need any more reassurance that he can trust me with this, he closes the distance between us and still trembling, now even letting his tears run across his cheeks like rivers, he wraps his strong arms around me and so do I, rubbing his back as I hug him close, afraid he'd slip through my grip if I weren't.

"I-it was awful. He came at me and..." he sobs into the crook of my neck, barely able to squeeze a full sentence out of himself. I just run a hand through his hair, damp from his sweating, to comfort him.

"I told him I-I won't join his boy band. And he... he used a curse," by the time he gets through telling me his rather traumatic experience, dream-his interaction with his father, his voice cracks and lowers into a painful whisper.

"It's okay," I hug him tighter, and to that, he squeezes me more against himself as well. "It was just a dream."

"But it felt so real," he trembles again, shaking in his whole body as he holds me so tight.

I don't let go of him, nor does he break the contact either.

"I-I-I'm sorry I just came to you without anything... and for having you listen to this shite. It's just... only you know about it and I don't want to worry Theo," he pulls back to look at me after a few moments of him being comforted by me and me being comforted by the long hug we shared. It was much needed for me too.

"Don't be silly," I chuckle softly and shake my head. "You're not a burden. And I'm glad you came to me," I squeeze his arm reassuringly.

Minutes later, we're sitting on the cool wooden flooring, our backs against the walls that have the window in-between, just calming him down as we watch the storm outside, listening as the heavy rain crashes against the window, gifting us with the music of nature itself.

"Haven't seen you all day," Mattheo exclaims after some time of just staring off into the void, probably trying to cool down after the nightmare.

"Been at the library."

"Yeah, Ki told. But after that?"

"Took a nap."

He frowns. I can tell what he's thinking just by the way he looks at me, his eyes shining in the dim light of the night as the moon is peeping through the clouds, trying to steal the night back to have all the attention to himself.

"You haven't come down for dinner either," he points out, trying not to sound too concerned.

"Slept it through."

"Cassie-"

"No. I'm fine. Stop worrying about me," I sigh and look out the window. I don't know what to say after this. I feel like I've killed the mood as well.

"Okay. Sorry," he mutters and I leave it at it, not saying anything else. I would say something to not be sitting here with a friend in complete silence but it feels as if I had no thoughts. No feelings and no thoughts, except for the ones about yesterday. I feel empty, completely vacant, like the bottles of firewhisky consumed the day before in the Slytherin common room.

I want to ask him how that dance with Daphne went. I also want to ask him what happened after I left yesterday (but I'm not even sure if he'd noticed I sneaked back to my dorm), if he knows where Enzo was (which I could just ask from the guy in question, but again, it's not my business). But lacking of words to express all these thoughts and feelings that frame the thoughts about last night, it's just easier to keep them to myself as I can't find the right way to phrase and voice them.

"It was the Cruciatus Curse. The one he used in my dream," he says after seconds of silence when he realizes I'm not going to denote any of my possible thoughts, trying to sound neutral about it but his tired voice cracks once again and it comes through more as one filled with concern and some fear.

Opening my eyes, I have to think through what happened last night. Mattheo came up for comfort after he'd had a nightmare and after I refused to talk about what was bothering me, as an unspoken agreement we decided to sail onto lighter waves and talk about casual stuff; films, the Triwizard Tournament, music and avoided talking about school at all costs because it could've been traced back to his nightmares through how he's relieved to be back at Hogwarts after a summer all-too-long with Theodore Nott Sr., and the unforeseen events of the World Cup that still haunt me.

So, he insisted on going through my collection of vinyl and mixtapes. Most of the vinyls are from the attic at home; I've found some David Bowie, Queen, The Clash, and T. Rex albums up, in a box with the label only being "G.P.12" written with big, capital letters. I assume these are the stuff dad's listened to before he died. When I found the box I immediately took it to my room to go through the collection. I've been listening to them all summer long — much to Kiara's exasperation — and definitely have grown fond of them in the time being.

My music taste mostly consisted of the kind of rock that teens usually listen to when they're first met by some good rock songs and decide 'This is not music taste, this is a lifestyle' only to grow bored after listening to these few songs by the given artists for months on repeat. I mostly listened to AC/DC before, mixed with some Nirvana, Guns N' Roses, Black Sabbath, Deep Purple, Aerosmith, and Led Zeppelin. But only their top hits — basic, aren't I? I mean, my mixtape I've been listening to on repeat, wearing it out to the point it almost broke, and consisting of Back In Black, Highway To Hell, Hell's Bells, T.N.T, Thunderstruck, Sweet Child O' Mine, Paradise City, I Was Made For Lovin' You, Smells Like Teen Spirit, Welcome To The Jungle, Immigrant Song, Paranoid and The Trooper should be considered a unique taste that totally describes me, right?

That was until this summer when my taste in music got turned upside down, almost completely by finding out I'm more into glam, and the more singable and melodic (and queer) side of rock.

So, Mattheo insisting on going through my vinyl and tapes is what ended in us falling asleep while the record was still playing. And it is also what results in me waking up in the morning on a mountain of tapes, my legs tangled up with the boy's. I sit up and take notice of how he's sleeping on the other end of the bed, on his back. I just watch for a few seconds, taking in how peaceful he's looking, just for once in a lifetime; no forehead wrinkling, no tense facial muscles, just a relaxed, calm expression as he's sleeping soundly, unaware of his surroundings. I watch as his chest rises and falls when breathing, how he occasionally takes a deeper, sharper inhale, releasing stress even in his sleep.

Cass, stop.

You're being a creep. He's your friend, you can't be just staring at him while he's asleep. In your dorm, in your bed.

Our legs are still touching.

With a sigh, I pull my leg away from on top of his and as I start to get up to stretch, I realize that he is indeed in my dorm and he couldn't be farther away from where he's supposed to be.

His dorm. In the Slytherin area.

Because right now, he's in the Gryffindor Tower and there's no way no one will notice if he just leaves like this. For Merlin's sake, how on earth have I got into this? Not that I care for my own good about what my housemates would think of me if they ever saw him walk out of my dorm like this, through the common room, it's not the case. But there are already too many rumours about us, all rude ones and I don't think we'd ever need more.

I look at the clock; it's 7:58, on a Sunday. The common room is filled with people.

I let out a sigh and go over to the bed to wake Mattheo up. But he just rolls over to his stomach and tells me to fuck off. After trying to be nice a few more times but getting the same response and even nudging him doesn't work, I decide to use the same technique I usually use on Kiara.

Turning my back to him, I lie down on top of him, my limbs hanging on the two sides. He finally takes notice of this and mutters in a calm tone. "What are you doin'?"

"Trying to wake you up," I reply in the same undisturbed tone as I'm staring up at the ceiling.

"Isn't working," he murmurs back and when he isn't moving, I take the initiative of the situation and get up, practically straddling him as I kneel up by the two sides of his hips and start to continuously (gently, may I add before someone said I'm abusing my friend) hit him. But when he only lets out a grunt, I lean forward and bite his arm. To that, his eyes open.

"Finally," I state satisfied, and just as I am about to get off of him, he rolls over to his back and pulls me back down and in a second, he's towering over me. I can feel his breath on me when he pins my wrists to the mattress.

"Did you really bite me?" he asks with furrowed eyebrows in a slightly playful tone, and I nod, trying not to become flustered at the positioning as I can feel his warm breath on my collarbones, his hands gripping my wrists and his hips brushing up against mine.

"You didn't respond to anything else," I smirk playfully, mixed with a sense of innocence.

"Why even did you wake me up?" he then looks over at the clock on my bedside table and groans when he sees it's only 8:07. "Ugh, Cassie."

"Shut up, you have to get out of here unnoticed," I try to free my wrists of his grip and he frowns, not understanding why he has to get out with no one noticing he's ever been here. I then tell him how weird it would get, how many new rumours we'd start, and stuff. I really do not need to be in the spotlight right now.

This is what results in me going over to Harry and Ron's dorm to borrow the well-known invisibility cloak from my friend. And this is what ends up with Mattheo and I under it, trying not to slide down the stairs as we both want to be the navigators. It all goes smoothly until Seamus and Dean make their way up the narrow staircase and we have to press up against the wall — and against each other. The next time we almost get caught is when I nearly trip on the hem of the cloak and Mattheo catches me, holding me tight against himself and I pretty much get a heart attack at his closeness again. What is up with me today?

Anyhow, we make it out of the Gryffindor common room and get into a secluded corner of the other corridor so that we can take the cloak off without being caught.

"You're really not as dumb as I initiated," he nudges me with a devious grin under the cloth and I smack his arm but I'm not able to hide a smirk from forming and Matt pulls the cloak off us. This is when I take notice of a familiar mop of brown hair passing by the entrance of the corridor and I shove Mattheo inside a nearby broom closet, almost tripping in the small, dark space.

After shaking himself out of astonishment, Mattheo grins at me and starts to tease me.

"Princess, we could've just stayed in your dorm. Your bed would've been much comfier to-"

"I'm not having sex with you, Mattheo Riddle," I poke him in the chest, practically pressing him against the wall behind him, and just when I say the word regarding physical contact with another person, the door opens, revealing two of our friends, about to burst out laughing, stating our close proximity with two of those charming Italian grins.

My cheeks flush out of embarrassment as I look at Ki and Theo and a stupid grin spreads across Mattheo's lips as well, mirroring the two, one of the kind that makes me really want to jinx him.

"She just jumped at me," Matt exclaims as if he were a victim of my desires, earning a sting from me on his arm hanging between us. "Ow. See? Feisty, this one."

"In a broom cupboard? Bold choice," Kiara grins and I shoot her a glare, a mix of frustration and fluster.

"And the initiator as well," Theo teases, and with a sigh and a grunt, I go to shove past them and leave. It's too early for this shit. Mattheo will explain to them what happened, anyway.

"Leaving without a kiss?" Mattheo calls after me and I can feel my blood boiling. I let my impulsive behaviour take over me as I turn around, and without thinking, I grab the back of his head and pull him down to crash my lips against his. He provoked me, he got what he wanted...

...Or have I taken it too far?

But the kiss only lasts a second, until I realize what I've done. Not giving him any time to react; to pull me more into the kiss or conversely, push me away, I break away from the boy, leaving him surprised, cursing in my head, and ignoring my friends' calls, I start running back to my dorm.

What have I done?

thank you if you made it this far! comment to be on the tag list.

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ax-y10 · 1 year

Text

Soundcheck

In which- A flirty Wilbur doesn't quite match with a nervous reader

a/n: This is for a writing trade with @lanaxoxoxoxoxox. Sorry if it's shit but I'm currently writing this right before I'm going to help my friends with training for their soccer game

Chapter info: Short... sorry, based off of this, almost kissing, small spaces, pinning against a wall (well, Joe, in this instance), eye contact, flirting, nervousness, friends to lovers?, claustrophobia, swearing, slightly suggestive?, teasing

Pronouns: None (You/Yours)

Masterlist:

Between Wilbur's flirty comments and the rush of losing one of Mark's drumsticks, you weren't having such a great day. Wilbur would not shut up and kept trailing behind you, spewing pick up line after pick up line, "Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see," "Wilbur, I swear to- shut the fuck up and help me find Mark's drumstick,"

And Mark wasn't much of a help either, and encouraged the flirtatious remarks, pushing Wilbur towards you and shouting out a pick up line for him to say. At one point during soundcheck, Mark decided to hatch a plan with Wilbur, which you were very unaware of, and surprised you were when you stumbled forward, a hard surface behind you.

"Joe? What the fuck. Is happening? Why the fuck is Wilbur pushing me towards you? Please, tell me something," You begged for an answer. Why were you being caged in? Why was your long-time crush, Wilbur fucking Soot, backing you up against Joe? Was he in on the plan too? Does no one know you hate small spaces?

Getting scared being pushed up against Joe and Wilbur slowly leaning towards you, you were getting nervous, moving your legs up and down and rubbing them against each other in nervousness. Fair enough, it's a tiny space, but you can move and get away, right? Wrong.

Soon enough, Wilbur's long ass arms were right next to your head, his palms pressed flat against Joe's back, and his head tilted to the right, as if leaning in for a kiss. It's stupid, and you know he doesn't like you back, but what if? What if he's liked you as long as you've liked him? What if he's actually leaning in for a kiss? Should I kiss him? Should I tell him to stop? Should I-

And you were both separated by Ash, Wilbur sending you a wink, seeing your tomato red cheeks, and going back to the soundcheck at hand.

He's going to regret that...

#wilbur soot #wilbur x reader #wilbur soot imagine #wilbur #wilbur soot x reader #100 follower event #100 followers #event #follower milestone #wilbur soot fic #wilbur soot fluff #wilbur soot drabble #wilbur fluff

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ughgoaway · 1 year

Text

i hate matty healy- chapter 5

content warnings: 18+ (mdni), smut, blowjobs, swearing, drinking, questionable decisions and probably other things I'm forgetting <3 word count - 4600-ish

a/n: hi again!! sorry this is kinda long it got away from me, if it's too long and you prefer shorter chapters pls let me know! anyway, this chapter was fun to write but rereading it I lowkey hate it but if I try to go through and edit it again I will kill someone so I'm leaving it be <3 I'm currently obsessed with matty + the red guitar and that's all my brain can think of!! thats all byeee

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Old pictures and posters cover the ceiling staring back at you. An old blur poster, next to an oasis one because you could never choose. Pictures of your sixth form prom, you arm in arm with George after you got cancelled on by your original date and he stepped up to take you. And of course, the very first poster of the 1975 to be printed. Technically it was the first poster of Drive like I do but one day Matty came over announcing they had changed the band name. Again. And crossed out drive like I do and scribbled “the 1975” over the top.

If you didn't know better you'd think that poster was the only one up there, it seemed to grow each time you stared up. Every time you lay down on your childhood bed you are met with a picture of him. The dickhead you're trying to convince yourself you really do think is a dickhead. But here you are again. At 3 am staring up at his face. The moonlight filtering through your window was highlighting the poster almost mockingly. God even the moon was working against you.

You growl in frustration and go onto your phone in an effort to distract your racing mind only to be met with another photo of Matty and the boys. Fucking Matty. It felt like he was stalking you. Which would be impressive considering you and him hadn't spoken in 2 weeks, not since that night on the tour bus.

As you expected the guys hugged and made up the next morning, consoling each other like 15-year-old girls. But the same couldn't be said for you and Matty. You hadn't spoken at the last show, in the airport or even on the plane home despite being sat together. It was a very frosty 14 hours. But if he was going to be stubborn, you would be stubborn right back. You hadn't let him win before and you certainly wouldn't now.

Only a few miles away Matty was in a very similar situation to you, staring at the ceiling willing his brain to stop swirling. As you were all on a brief break from tour Matty thought it would be best to come home to Wilmslow, just to make sure he wouldn't see you in London. Because if he did he's not sure how much longer he could keep up the stubborn act, and he was nothing if not competitive.

He really did feel bad about that night on the bus but he needed you to crack first, he couldn't lose again. Little did Matty know that you had thought the same thing, you were desperately craving the comfort home gave you and the distance from him. In trying to be apart the two of you had only pushed yourself closer.

Fresh air. That would sort you right out, normally you couldn't take a walk at 3 am but that was in London. Wilmslow was nothing like London, the most dramatic thing to happen in months is Ken and Linda's divorce so you didn't feel like you were at much risk for being brutally murdered. Unbeknownst to you, across town Matty was having the exact same thought. Well, almost the same thought, he can't say Ken or Linda crossed his mind.

Cold air filled your lungs and your mind flashed back to the night at the club. The weird eye contact, the awkward cigarette and the strange silent agreement all shot to the front of your mind. Shaking your head you try and tell yourself to just stop thinking. With no place in mind you just began moving, the thought of standing still for 5 more seconds seemed impossible to you. Before you knew it your feet were taking you in the direction of the skate park, a place you frequented a lot when you were younger.

Desperately tagging along with your older brother to start with but as you got older it was your brother and his mates, who soon became your mates. Well some of them did. The one glaring exception to that was also on his way to the very same skate park, old skateboard in hand.

Matty had slithered out of his mum's house as quietly as he could, trying not to wake her or Louis up, knowing he would never hear the end of it. Before he left he grabbed his board from the cupboard under the stairs, he briefly thanked whatever God there may be that his mum hadn't binned it on any of her cleaning rampages.

With each step you felt your mind freeing, being home always put you at peace; apart from your mum sometimes but you would never tell her that. Eventually, you see the skate park start to come into view, you'd tried to stop at the corner shop to get some alcohol before remembering that you weren't in London, and the corner shop closed about 7 hours ago.

The smell of freshly cut grass filled your senses the further into the park you went, it comforted you as you trudged your way across the large football field that separates the main park from the skatepark. After many complaints from parents about “hooligan teenagers” the skate park was moved slightly further away from the play equipment.

For a second, you could've sworn you saw a shadow on one of the ramps, but you wrote it off as an animal or something. No one else would be out at this time. You are pretty sure the whole town of Wilsmlow was asleep from 9 pm to 7 am every day.

You reached the top of the smallest ramp and sat down swinging your legs over the ledge and for 5 whole minutes, you hadn't thought of Matty once until you heard an unmistakable voice ring out from below you.

“You’re kidding me right now.” You froze, briefly thinking it was your imagination but nope, you looked down the ramp and met with the eyes of the very man you were desperately trying to avoid thinking about.

You had no witty reply, no quick retort because at that moment you couldn't think of anything worse than seeing him. Especially when he looked like that. His normally perfectly manicured curls were fizzy and unkempt. He was wearing an old pair of tartan pyjama trousers, a ripped oversized harley davidson t-shirt and a fluffy cardigan that if you were to guess, was his mum's. Dark circles surrounded his eyes which looked slightly sunken, and in his left hand was the same board you coveted from all those years ago.

Maybe it wasn't the rockstar performer Matty that most people knew, but this was your favourite Matty. The Matty only a few people saw, the slight sleep-deprived domestic Matty always had a soft spot in your heart. Not that he knew that, you're not even sure you knew that until you saw him in that moment.

Silently he jumped up next to you and sat down, both of you chose to ignore the way your shoulders brushed and the way spark it created. After a few beats you got the courage to speak up, “is that the skateboard you taught me to skate on?” you asked, remembering the long few weeks of learning to skate. It was a summer of many bruised knees and drunk nights in the park; to this day it was one of your fondest memories of home.

Matty jumped slightly at your voice, not expecting you to be the first to talk, “Yeah, mum never threw it out I guess. Do you remember how shit you were?” He giggled out the last sentence, his shoulders shaking your own. You eventually started to laugh with him, if you were honest with yourself you really were shit. Ross had taken to skating so quickly you thought it would be the same for you but it wasn't.

“Yeah, I do. Remember that I was such a shit student that all the boys fobbed me off to you? They knew you wouldn't go easy on me like they did.” This caused a loud laugh to bubble out from both of you which soon turned into sleep-deprived cackling that had you holding your stomachs and gasping for breath.

Eventually, you got your breath back and lay down staring up at the sky, Matty soon followed suit and the silence resumed. But this silence was slightly more relaxed, still not pleasant but it was better.

“Hey, you want to go back to mine? I have a bottle of wine stashed under my bed from my 19th that I'm desperate to drink right now.” Matty whispered, despite no one being around it still felt like it was right to whisper. He expected a hard and fast no from you but instead, you were quiet. A little too quiet, Matty turned his head to look at you and was shocked to find you already facing him.

He stared into your eyes and admired the way your eyelashes fluttered against your cheek. You did the same to him, loving the way the moon reflected in his deep brown irises.

Just as quietly as he asked you responded with a simple, “Yes, let's go.” Soon enough you were walking side by side down the streets of the small town you both grew up in. This time, the silence was comfortable. Unusual, but comfortable.

The keys rattled in the door of Matty's door as he opened it, slowly he poked his head around and thankfully no one was awake. He ushered you in and you followed him slowly up his stairs, a sense of familiarity washed over you as you looked around. His house hadn't changed from when you were young. The same Beatles artwork lined the hallway and the stairs were still covered in a deep purple carpet that Denise always insisted she would replace “next year.”

Matty's room was also the same you thought as you walked in, you hadn't spent much time in here but over the years you'd picked up Ross from band practice or sat with the boys getting high. It was still very similar to your own, every surface was covered in posters. Various bands littered the walls along with posters of his favourite movies, pulp fiction and true romance took pride of place above his bed.

Of course, it was still matty so there was also a rather large “Legalise it” poster above the keyboard in the corner. His bed was decorated with black sheets covered in small white stars. The headboard had fairy lights wrapped around it, you had made fun of Matty when he first put them up but he insisted they were “fucking vibey.” And to be fair to him, when you were stoned they really were.

You sat down on the bed and Matty got on his knees to begin looking for the wine stashed under the bed. Already slightly drunk just on the presence of Matty you joked, “Now there's a sight I like, Matty Healy on his knees” An unimpressed look fell over Matty's face as you began to giggle at your own immature joke.

“Such dirty jokes darling! And in my childhood room nonetheless” Matty jokingly retorted after coming back up victoriously, a bottle of wine in hand. The springs squeaked when he sat down next to you, he unscrewed the wine and took a quick sip before handing it over to you.

The maroon liquid slid down your throat and immediately calmed your racing thoughts, you knew it couldn't work that quickly but in that moment you didn't care for logic. “As if this room hasn't seen a lot worse over the years Healy, I've heard the horror stories!” you smirked as you handed Matty back the bottle. Passing it back and forth between you, both taking short sips and enjoying the pretty cheap wine.

“Horror stories! Sweetheart I’m wounded” Matty joked holding a hand to his heart and acting as if you had stabbed him. His childlike actions solicited a small laugh out of you, soon a hush fell over you both as you looked into each other's eyes and wordlessly kept swigging the wine.

Matty's eyes flicked down to your lips so briefly that if you blinked you would've missed it. But you didn't miss it. And he didn't want you to. Your breath shifted as he started to move ever so slightly closer, as if he was testing the water.

You didn't have the patience to test the water and crashed your lips into his, pulling his face into yours. He quickly reciprocated and pulled you into his lap gripping your ass as you ground down into him, only the thin fabric of both your pyjamas kept you separated.

You felt matty hardening beneath you and a plan formed in your head, with a smirk you broke the kiss. Matty desperately chased your lips but you pushed him away and began slithering down his body, before long you were on your knees in front of him. “You know I never did apologise for the other night” you drawled out, sliding your hand up his clothed thighs, rising up slightly on your knees.

“Oh- yeah- I meant to apologise for that-” Matty began to ramble, with the way you were looking up at him- how could he not? He was starting to stutter when you interrupted him with a hand on his chest.

“Matty im the one apologising remember? What did you say again? Oh yeah, ‘next time you come crawling back to me you'll have to beg on your knees.’ well here I am, on my knees.” You began to press small slow kisses up his neck, licking and sucking when you reached the edge of his jaw.

Matty swiftly realised you wanted this, and you wanted him. He slipped right back into the new version of him you had begun to love. “Well baby, I did say beg and I haven't heard that yet” he tried to keep his voice steady as you hit a particularly sensitive spot behind his ear.

Sitting back on your knees slightly you make eye contact with Matty and breathe out, “Please let me suck you off Matty. Please. I promise it will make you feel so much better.” you punctuated the end of your sentence with a particularly dirty kiss that pushed Matty right to the edge.

“Shit- yeah go ahead baby” Matty sighed out and soon enough you were making your way back down his neck and torso.

You pressed your face into the warm skin of Matty’s stomach, pushing hot kisses down his body until you reach his waistband. You let a shaky breath out as you pull down his trousers and free Matty's achingly hard cock. He let out a strained moan as he looked down at you, seeing you on your knees looking up at him with doe eyes and fluttering your eyelashes is going to be the death of him; he was sure of it.

“I've been thinking about doing this for a long time” You muttered, letting your lips and tongue delicately brush against Matty's tip. He growled in response and griped your hair harshly, desperately trying to avoid just fucking your mouth.

“C'mon sweetheart stop teasing or I’ll- shit-” Matty's complaint was cut short by you taking him in your mouth all the way down and swallowing around him. His fingernails scratched your scalp as he grabbed and pulled your hair.

Your nose brushed the dark curly hairs and the base of his dick as you held it in your mouth, focusing on the deep buzz of desire making its way through you. Matty jerked his hips forward at the feeling causing you to gag but at that moment you didn't notice, the only thought in your head being making him feel good. Your hand press his thighs against the bed, revelling in the noises coming from Matty, each new grunt and groan fuelled your ego.

You began moving up and down on his cock, taking what you didn't have in your mouth in your hand and jerking it. Slowly you gain confidence and start moving quicker, twisting your hand at the base and going up and down his shaft. Tracing the large vein on the underside with your tongue each time you move up and down. You came fully off and began making out with his tip, giving the underside kitten licks and groaning at the taste.

The low groan that resonated out of you caused Matty to jerk forward once again, you took it as an invitation and dropped your hands from his thighs and looked up at him. You keen into his hand hoping he would understand your silent plea. Your blood-red nails trailed down Matty’s legs leaving scratches in their wake. Matty thrusts again in your throat, loving the feeling of you marking him; the pleasure mixing with the pain.

Tears are streaming out of your eyes and spit bubbles at the corners of your mouth but you couldn't care less at this moment because Matty was looking at you with such hunger it causes wetness to pool in your underwear. Looking up at him you begin to beg with your eyes, desperate to have him claim you.

Matty delicately swipes the mascara-coloured tears from your cheeks and asks the question he's been so desperate to since you dropped to your knees “You want me to fuck your mouth huh baby? fuck you up a little?” you nod as fervently as you can with his cock resting in your mouth, causing Matty to spit out a string of curses.

“Yes fuck- I always thought of doing this to you in here shit-” Matty sighs out as he begins experimentally thrusting into your throat. You were too lost in the haze to hear his comment and began to gag slightly as his cock hits the back of your throat. A low moan from you encouraged Matty to go faster and soon enough he was fucking your throat wildly, ignoring any gags from you only being spurred on by the moans leaving your filled throat.

Each time Matty's hard cock hits the back of your throat you have to hold back a whimper. His cock fit perfectly in your mouth and you loved feeling him. Matty had received many blowjobs in his 29 years of life but he would swear on anything that it has never felt this fucking good. Each time you tightened your throat around him caused his mind to reel and made his grip on your hair even more viscous as he puppeted your head up and down his shaft.

You swallow around Matty as he stares at your mouth stretched out around his cock, marvelling at your closed eyes; you were obviously enjoying this just as much as he was.

You couldn't get enough of the feeling of his heavy dick in your mouth. You flicked your eyes open to stare at the man in front of you, taking delight in the way sweat drips from his brow as he works himself in and out of your mouth.

“Such a good girl for me yeah? Knew you'd be back on your knees just not like this fuck.” Matt's head lulled back and he closes his eyes a low groan coming from deep within his chest. “I’m gonna cum sweetheart shit- look at me yeah? Look in my eyes when I cum down your throat.” As soon as your eyes meet, Matty is cumming hot and thick down your throat.

After a few seconds Matty pulls out and tucks his dick back into his boxers, as he looks back at you he sees you swaying slightly on your knees obviously fucked out, cum dribbling out of the corners of your mouth. Matty grips your chin and pulls your face up to meet his, “open your mouth.”

As you do he's met with a sight that made him weak, your tongue was heavy with his cum. A primal growl comes from Matty as he leans down and spits in your mouth, snapping your mouth shut with his hand on your jaw.

“Swallow,” he demands. A squeak of shock leaves your mouth only to be followed quickly by a moan as you swallow down the mixture of cum and spit. You try to grind down on something absentmindedly, desperately trying to alleviate some of the pressure building in your stomach.

Matty notices your feeble attempt at feeling some relief and pulls you up onto the bed, holding your neck possessively as he says, “Oh baby did you get all worked up by me fucking your mouth?” You groan and give Matty a nod, desperate for him to help with the wetness between your thighs.

“I would help darling but this was an apology remember? You needed to say sorry to me, and you have. But you won't be getting anything in return. You should be thankful I let you suck me off.” he paused briefly a filthy smirk coming across his face. “So say thank you, baby”

Your voice was raw and scratchy from Matty's rough treatment as you breathed out a meek, “Thank you Matty” he smiled appreciatively at your obedience and cruelly patted your cheek.

“Let's go to sleep now baby, come lay down with me,” Matty said as he lay down on his bed, patting the empty space next to him. You joined Matty and the two of you begin to lazily make out until the post-orgasm haze got the better of you both and you fell asleep on Matty's chest, rising and falling with each of his breaths.

Sunlight streamed through the curtains and illuminated the small space you were asleep in, dots and streaks moved through the room as the trees swayed and allowed sunlight to peak through and dance on the ceiling. Matty stared at your sleeping figure and thought about how peaceful you looked. He's only ever seen you so at peace once in his life before, the day he finally saw your apartment for the first time.

Unlike the other guys, Matty had never been inside your apartment let alone slept over but the others were always there.As far as Matty knew your apartment could be a secret drug den but all he's ever seen is the 3-meter-squared entryway. Until the day he finally got a peek when he picked Ross up on the way to the studio.

Ross had forgotten something inside so ran to grab it and accidentally left the door open, Matty immediately stuck his head in and began looking around; he ignored the fact that he was so eager to see how you lived.

Plants were everywhere, even trailing down the walls, which was strange to him; he never thought of you as a plant person. Large colourful sofas filled the living room as well as bookcases overflowing with old novels and nicknacks. They were dark oak, Matty assumed they were another charity shop find and admired the small rose engraving that trailed up the side of them.

Framed photos of you and the boys were on almost every surface, the sight warmed his heart a small bit. Despite spending 24/7 with them you still wanted them around in some way or another. Soon enough Matty realised that quiet music was filtering through the apartment and he felt himself being drawn toward it.

He began to follow the music that he now recognised as Otis Redding’s love man record; one of his favourites. The sight he was met with made his mouth go dry. You were standing in your pyjamas, softly swaying standing at the oven cooking pancakes. A small smile graced your lips as you mouthed the words, your hair wet from a shower. Matty couldn't help but feel his heart flutter at seeing you in such a domestic setting.

The large windows that were all over your apartment left you standing in a sunbeam, if Matty didn't know better he would think it was a spotlight. The light was filtering around you perfectly, bouncing off your pink silk pyjamas.

Matty didn't like how he felt at that moment. He felt a sense of yearning. To see this again, as much as he could. To be standing with you singing Otis Redding. Obviously, he knew as soon as you saw him this illusion would be shattered, and it was, but he almost began to enjoy the discomfort of standing there, knowing it was caused by you.

Before long you spotted him, called him a perv for staring and pushed him right back to the entryway but Matty has never forgotten how you looked that morning. How restful it all felt. It reminded him of now as he watched you breathe, your hair sprawled over his pillowcase with a small smile on your lips. God, even when asleep you were beautiful.

Wait. No. Not beautiful, just tranquil. Silent. Before he could spiral much longer you woke up from your sleep and smiled at him, observing how the sun behind him illuminated his frazzled curls and almost looked like a halo around him.

“Hi,” you said simply, not quite awake but aware someone needed to say something otherwise you're sure you'd be sitting in silence for the next hour. “Hi,” he said back the exact same way, with an airy quality surrounding the word.

The pressure was building between the two of you to have a real conversation about this, whatever it was. Because at this point it had to be something. But you weren't ready for that conversation and neither was he, all you both wanted to do was live in this moment. With the sun heating the room you were in, the light hit all the right places around you. So you did what any sane person would do at that moment, proposition him.

“Wanna have sex?” you bluntly said, raising your eyebrows suggestively. A Cheshire cat-like smile broke out on Matty's face as he leaned in and began kissing you. This kiss began slow, his lips moved slowly and carefully over yours, he moved his hand from the bed up to your cheek and pulled you in harder.

The kiss began to heat up as you grabbed Matty's bottom lip between your lip and pulled on it. In response Matty growled and pulled away, he laid down and grabbed your hips, pulling you onto him just like last night.

You pulled away and sat up to admire the man under you, he had taken his shirt off at some point in the night leaving his chest bare, his pale skin was stark against the black sheets. You traced each one of his tattoos with your pointer finger admiring how his muscles tensed with your featherlight touch. His lips were red and puffy from the rough kisses, his cheeks were pink and he was flushed all over, giving his whole body a small glow.

Matty whined impatiently and pulled at the hem of your shirt prompting you to take it off. You quickly followed his request and stripped off the baggy shirt revealing your bare chest, your nipples pebbled at the cold air. Matty groaned appreciatively and sat up to begin assaulting your chest with kisses and leaving small hickeys in his wake, delicately scraping his teeth against your breasts. He marvelled at the breathy moans you let out as he continued his movement.

The door of the small room creaked open but both you and Matty were too preoccupied to notice, soon a voice broke the silence.

You screamed and pulled the blanket up to cover your bare chest. All three of you stood there and stared, chests heaving in shock and eyes wide. How the hell were you going to explain this? Fuck.

#i hate matty healy series #matty healy fanfiction #matty healy smut #matty healy fanfic #matty healy x reader #matty healy #i love that pic of matty #this feels like too many hahstags but whatever #here you go i hope you dont hate it too much!!

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