#I wish I could find a complete guide to see if I got all the writing on the Rheddig and the history of Athia

[phoenixiancrystallist]

Month 3, day 17, got a couple more frames done on the face, but I had to stop because a) am sleeby tired, and b) the cat is so upset that I'm not settled down for bed, and therefor snuggles, that he's dropping gnarly cat farts at me. So, gonna go to bed and fix both issues XD

[areyouwell]

Nyctophobia

Noun: An extreme fear of the dark. Children or adults may have Nyctophobia if they are afraid to be left alone in darkness

Ch.1

Pairing: Logan Howlett x F!Mutant!Reader

Warnings: None as of yet, but we'll get there ;)

Word count: 9.2k

A/N: RIGHT FUCKERS ITS TIME. i don't think i've written a fic this long in goddamn years but here we are. DEFO ooc Logan and also timeline what timeline? Kitty is older than the rest of the students cuz i love her and i said so. reader's mutation is currently shadow-walking but that'll develop as we go on so slay boots. also I have no concept of word limits sooooo 9k chapter let's fucking go

How long had it been? Six months? A year? Two years? Honestly, you couldn’t recall. It felt like it had been forever since ol’ Charlie had sent you travelling the continent. Sure, it had been your idea to try and find mutants before they experience the most traumatic event of their lives, but you didn’t think he’d send you, and certainly not immediately. Though you were glad he did, you didn’t think Scott would make as good an impression as you could.

But, now you were back. Thank fuck. You could finally rest your weary legs and put down your heavy-as-shit bag. And at least now you could work on developing your mutation. Shadow walking. Or at least, it is now. You thought that was the extent of what you could do, just disappear and reappear whenever and wherever there happened to be a shadow cast on the ground. Or on a wall. Or anywhere really. But, Xavier had gently suggested that, perhaps, those shadows could be manipulated one way or another. You wished to fuck you knew how because your bag was all but cutting right through your shoulder.

Your boots crunched against the gravel as you took a deep breath, making your way inside. It was nice to notice nothing had changed. The lawn was still neatly mowed, brickwork hadn’t aged a day. It smelt like comfort. It smelt like home. But before you could even knock on the door, at least being courteous enough not to slip through the shadows, the oak burst open and two unidentified arms had wrapped themselves around your neck in one of the most warming hugs you’d ever received, accompanied by a high pitch squeal.

You knew instantly who that would be. Brown hair spilled across her shoulders, smelling faintly of lavender. “Hey Kitty,” you grinned, dropping your bag to return her tight embrace. It truly did feel like forever.

“I’m so happy to see you it’s been years! We thought you were never coming back! Scott thought you’d died and Charles wasn’t telling us, Logan didn’t think you even existed and that we were all lying, Jean thought you’d just got sick of this place and dipped, it was carnage!” She rambled, her deep brown eyes sparkling slightly. You had to take a minute to actually comprehend what the fuck she was saying before your lips split into a broad smile.

“Well, I can tell you that I’m not dead, at least not yet, and I do very much exist and I am not sick of this place despite what Jean may think. And– wait who’s Logan?” Your brain had only just caught up with the fact that Kit had mentioned a name completely unfamiliar to you. Just how long had you been gone?

“Oh, right yeah. A new teacher,” Kitty kept one arm around your shoulder as she guided you back inside, stopping only when you realised your bag was still left discarded by the front door. “He uh, sorta took your position as PE and combat professor… sorry.” She looked genuinely apologetic, whilst internally, you couldn’t be more grateful. You always thought you weren’t ever cut out to teach, and whilst you sometimes enjoyed it, you were always too worried about the kids being hurt. 

“I’m hurt, a girl’s gone for a year or two and you replace her? What kind of school is this?” you cracked a smile, Kitty’s face morphing from remorse to relief. She really thought you’d be upset? You were touched. “Anyway, what time is it? Where is everyone? I thought classes stopped at–” You were cut off abruptly upon entering the lounge.

“Welcome back!” you covered your face at the chorus of voices, laughing behind your hands before clutching your heart dramatically. 

“Christ! You’ve all just knocked five years off my life!” you grinned, faces both familiar and unfamiliar laughing and smiling just to see you.

“They’ve been looking forward to this for days. Ever since rumour of your return started circulating, they’ve been pestering us nonstop for a date. Eventually, someone caved,” You didn’t need to see Scott’s eyes in order to know he was giving Kitty a pointed look behind his glasses. You looked back to see her looking sheepish.

“Yeah well… they can be really persuasive.” She shrugged, taking your bag off your shoulder and placing it out of the way. You sighed at the loss of weight, rolling your joint slightly. 

“It’s good to see you,” Scott pulled you in for a brief hug, clapping your back once before pulling back, letting the rest of your friends and pupils make their way over. You were consumed by various arms of embraces, questions about your travels, introductions to new students, reminiscing with old students. It was quite possibly the best moment you’d had since you left. But a face caught your eye at the back of the crowd. A young girl, with the same dark brown hair you remember, only now a streak of brilliant white framed her face.

You made your way over, shuffling through the crowd, clasping hands and shoulders with people you knew before finally getting to her.

“Hey you,” you smiled gently, remembering how timid and easy to scare she used to be. You were caught off guard completely by her sudden bright smile. 

“Hey.”

“How long’ve you been here? I didn’t actually think you’d listen to me to be brutally honest with you, thought you’d just shrug it off and continue your own path,” you were relieved to see she had listened to what you’d said two years ago. You’d urged her down this path, to find the school. You’d already known Charles would take her, it was just a matter of her taking herself here.

“Uh… about that…” you’d only seen a smile that sheepish on Kitty. You cocked a brow, head tilting to the side slightly before a hand on your shoulder caused you to whirl. But it was just Ororo. Clearly, your travels had affected you more than you originally thought. 

But Storm wasn’t looking at you, you could only see the back of her white hair as she frantically waved at someone through the crowd, beckoning them over.

“Logan!”

Ah, you guess that made sense now.

Whoever you’d expected to walk through the crowd, you threw that image out your mental window the moment you saw him. 

Now you understood why he taught combat and PE… he was fucking ripped. White t-shirt leaving nothing to the imagination. The facial hair was an interesting choice, but you couldn’t say it didn’t suit him. He was very… rugged lumberjack looking.

You placed a hand on your hip, brows raised in intrigue as he made his way over. You don’t think you’d ever seen a grumpier-looking man. 

“Logan, this is Phantom,” your eyes slid to Ororo as she used your mutant name. 

“Ah, so you do exist,” his voice seemed a perfect match for the rest of him, just as rough and rugged as the worn jeans he was wearing. You nodded, mouth quirking into a small smirk.

“Heard there was some debate over that, glad I could put it to rest,” you outstretched your hand for him to shake, something you were surprised he actually did, calloused palm encasing your own.

“Can ya blame me?” He asked with a raised brow, dropping your hand after a beat too long. Clearly unaccustomed to civility, judging from his appearance. 

“Guess not. You’re also the son-of-a-bitch that stole my position, right?” You asked, wanting to be a lot more serious than you actually were being, but for some reason, you couldn’t help grinning slightly. 

“Language!” Storm elbowed you slightly. Guess you’d forgotten how to behave around the kids too.

Logan held his hands up in surrender. “In my defense, I didn’t think you existed,” though he also seemed serious, you thought you could detect something that could be perceived as humour in his hazel eyes. You couldn’t keep up your poorly constructed façade anymore, waving your hand as if to physically clear the air between the two of you.

“I’m kidding, you can keep it. In all honesty, I was never really cut out for it.” You shrugged. “Besides, I’m–”

“She’s being super modest by the way, she rocked as that professor!” Kitty called from the other side of the room, somehow managing to listen to your conversation. You didn’t know how, since the entire welcome party was still chatting way, but you cast her a withering look nonetheless. 

“So I’ve heard,” Logan’s eyes slid from Kitty back to you as you scoffed.

“Though, of course, it was purely hypothetical, since I didn’t exist and all.” You teased, gesturing to your very much existing self. You silently triumphed over the fact you managed to drag a small smile out of him, realising that making this man pull any other expression other than irritation was something to be proud of. 

You hadn’t realised how completely caught up in the introduction you’d been before you noticed the girl still standing next to you, eyes flicking between you and Logan with a small smile pulling at the corners of her lips. 

“Anyway,” you continued pointedly, “you were saying? So you didn’t come to find this place?” your head tilted again slightly in confusion. “How did you end up here?”

Rogue looked from you to Logan, who’s eyes were still trained on you. You looked between them. “Nope, still confused. How did…?” 

“Well, after you found me, I did carry on my own path, which led me to some shady bar where Logan found me,” she explained quietly.

“More you found me but sure.” He shrugged. You could tell there was some kind of bond between them, one you could recognise was only built through trauma. You’d heard a little of what happened with Eric through Charles’ telepathic link, but he always reassured you to continue what you were doing. But you often wondered what could have happened if you’d returned. 

“So, you brought her here?” You asked, trying to prompt the story forward. Honestly, you wanted to know how he’d succeeded where you’d failed. You could be incredibly persuasive when you wanted to be, but Rogue was stubborn on another level. 

“Me? Nah, didn’t know this place existed at that point.”

“Seems to be a common theme with you,” you couldn’t help the subtle teasing grin spreading across your face, nor your laugh as he rolled his eyes skyward.

“Never gonna live that down, am I?”

“Not whilst I’m still breathing,” you winked, before turning your attention back to Rogue and completely missing the way his features shuddered slightly. “So how’d you get here if tall, dark, and broody over here didn’t know about this?” 

“Tall, dark, and– what?” He asked, bewildered.

Ororo snorted in amusement, before stepping in. “That would be us. We’d been tracking another mutant, Sabretooth, and he just so happened to be tracking Logan, or so we thought at the time. We found Sabretooth, and these two at the same time. Brought them both back.” 

You nodded in understanding, now finally having got through the whole story. Well, maybe not the whole story, you knew there were details you definitely were missing, but at least you got the jist.

“I see. Glad it wasn’t my lack of persuasive skills then. Though I guess a life or death situation isn’t much better. How’s your mutation coming along?” you asked, only now noticing the black, elbow-length gloves she was wearing. Ah.

“Still hard to control, but I’m getting better at it!” She looked genuinely enthusiastic about her mutation, so much so that it almost brought a tear to your eye. When you’d met her two years ago, you didn’t know if she even wanted help. She’d been so lost in her despair and self-loathing that you didn’t think she had long left with the way her mental health was going. So to see her so happy, your throat closed up slightly.

“I’m glad, I really am. You deserve this, Rogue. All of this,” you gestured to the room around, to the friends she’d made, to the haven she’d found.

“Oh, my name’s Marie. Guess I didn’t tell you before.” She shrugged, and you had to laugh to stop yourself from crying. 

“Marie it is.” Her story touched your heart, and to see she managed to get her happy ending… fuck you were so close to crying. You had to change the subject before you broke down in front of these people. “Oh hey, is my room still the same? Wouldn’t mind freshening up a little, been a long journey.” Two birds with one stone. You could leave the situation and cry in your bathroom whilst taking a shower so you didn’t smell like the wrong end of a skunk. Perfect!

“Uh…” Storm started.

“About that…” Kitty continued, coming over to stand alongside Storm. You looked between them, before shooting a glance to Logan who seemed to be showing absolutely no remorse.

“Your bed’s real comfy, bub” he smirked, and you gaped.

“You’re fucking kidding me?”

“Language!” both Ororo and Kitty said at the same time, and you winced.

“Fuck, sorry. Shit! Argh!” you gave up, throwing your hands in the air. “I’m not letting any of you off the hook. This is betrayal at its finest! Giving him my position I can handle, but my damn room? That’s shocking behaviour from the both of you!” You pointed at them accusingly, shooting a glare to the man next to you who was doing nothing but lowly chuckling. You breathe out a sigh. You had the best room in the whole mansion. Or at least you did, before Muscles McGee stole it from you.

“Don’t blame those two” Jean placed a calming hand on your shoulder. “we didn’t have another room made up when these two arrived. It was supposed to be temporary, but–”

“The view was too nice to pass up on,” Logan interjected. You realised he probably thought it was his turn to tease you. You knew that view was nice, it was overlooking the entire grounds behind the school. And whilst you were going to sorely miss it, you weren’t so heartless that you’d take it back from him. Besides, in a weird way, you felt like you owed him. He found Marie, and whatever transpired between them, she seemed happier now. You guessed you maybe had him to thank for that.

“Yeah yeah, alright fine. I concede. Where am I then?” you asked Jean, who broke into a broad smile.

“You’re in the one above, still got the same view, don’t worry,” she elbowed you slightly. That wasn’t so bad actually. Same view, same side of the mansion, just one story up? You breathed a sigh of relief. Yeah, you could do that.

“Good enough, I’m still mad about it though.” Your eyes narrowed at four of them, Logan included, before cracking your neck in preparation to take your bag all the way up the stairs.

Kitty clapped her hands excitedly, and you raised a brow in suspicion. “What’s got you so giddy?” you asked as she once again slid her arm across your shoulders, guiding you back towards the door. 

“Oh nothing, just glad you're home. It’s been kinda boring without you.” You laughed at that. With everything that’s been going on, you didn’t think any of them had time to be bored. But you appreciated the thought nonetheless. 

Eyeing your bag on the ground, there were times when you really wished your mutation involved some kind of super strength, because as happy as you were to be home and have a room just above your old one, you really didn’t want to lug that thing all the way up. And all the damn lights were on, so slipping up through the shadows was a no-go. You blew out a breath in preparation, rolling your shoulder once again, before you were stopped by a broad hand landing on your arm.

“I got it,” Logan’s voice weaved butterflies through your stomach. You hadn’t realised he was behind you before he was leaning down next to you and effortlessly slinging the bag over his own shoulder.

For the second time that afternoon, you gaped up at him, left almost speechless. 

“Super strength?” Was all you could say, hoping to Jesus he knew what you were asking. You watched his features morph from confusion to amusement as he shook his head slightly. 

“Nah, not quite.”

“Then how the fu–” you were reminded of the children present by a sharp elbow to the ribs from Kitty. “–uuun. How fun.” you gave up on your question, much to his mirth. The sight had your brain short-circuiting. You wouldn’t deny he was good-looking. You’d be fucking crazy to deny that. But there was something else hidden under all those knowing smirks and sharp glances. Something that you wouldn’t mind uncovering. 

Deciding that was a quest for another day, you turned abruptly on your heel, making your way to the staircase before once again stopping in your tracks. This was starting to get on your nerves a little. However, any irritation soon died as you finally saw Professor Xavier.

“Ah, I wondered whether the commotion was your return.”

You snorted a laugh. “No, you didn’t. You absolutely knew it was my return.” You quipped back, earning yourself a laugh from the man.

“As quick as ever. And I see you’ve met our Wolverine.” Charles nodded to Logan next to you, and you turned to him in bemusement. 

“Wolverine? Seriously?” you asked, laughing at his shrug. “Can’t think why…” your sarcastic jab paired with your pointed looks from his hair to his body brought another amused smirk from the man. 

“I thought you two would get along. Get yourself settled back in and meet me in my office and your earliest convenience.” You nodded back to Xavier, unable to take a moment to process what he meant when he said he thought you and Logan would get along before Kitty began dragging you towards the stairs.

“C’mon! You’re gonna love it!”You were slightly worried about what it was but followed her nonetheless.

Logan had to admit, he didn’t mind carrying your bag up four flights of stairs. It wasn’t the worst way to spend his afternoon. And as much as he wasn’t the kind of guy to stare at a woman’s ass, he wasn’t mad that he was behind you. 

Everything he’d been told about you had been proven correct. At least, everything he’d seen so far. Whether or not you could hold yourself in a fight was up for debate, but everything else, your wit, your charm, heartbreaking kindness, humour… it was all right there in front of him. 

Literally.

He’d lost count of how many times he’d had to bite back a smile or a laugh, stunned by the fact that you actually managed to break through and pull both from him. Even now, as you paused before the landing that lead to your old room and sighed wistfully, had had to stop himself grinning. And he was glad you turned back around quickly after throwing him a pointed glare over your shoulder because that was another smile he was struggling to rein in. Fuck, how did you do it? He’d only known you for half an hour and he’d displayed more expression than he had in his whole two years of being here. 

He was in huge trouble. 

The stairs finally flattened out to the top floor landing, Kitty still leading the way down the corridor until the final room. It was isolated, like his one floor below, and he guessed you must like it that way. Which he thought strange. The way you were with others, he hadn’t exactly pegged you for being someone who liked her space. But then again, he’d only known you for thirty minutes.

He had to remind himself of that. 

“Here we are!” Kitty grinned excitedly, stepping to the side to let you open the door yourself. Logan knew what you’d find behind the wood. He’d helped set it up after all. Some twisted guilt forced him into helping. At least, that’s what he told himself. 

You eyed Kitty suspiciously, before twisting the handle on the door, pushing slightly to reveal what she was so excited about. 

If Logan was being honest, your expression was worth all the consuming guilt he’d felt by taking your room. A smile of pure, unadulterated awe wiped all thought from his mind, your eyes were practically glowing.

“You… Kitty, you didn’t need to do this,” You looked back to the giddy girl and pulled her into a tight hug. Everything you remembered was here. Your posters, fairy lights, and every single plant you’d nourished and grown made your room look like a rainforest. The light in the ceiling had been covered by patterns to ensure there was always shadows cast somewhere, whether it be floor, wall, or ceiling. 

“It wasn’t just me! I employed help,” Kitty smiled, taking the liberties she knew she had to sit cross-legged on your bed. “And others offered to help.”

Logan held his breath as he felt your attention shift from Kitty to him, meeting your gaze of sheer wonder. 

“You helped?” you asked, taking your bag from his shoulder, though he was almost too caught up in your gaze to notice.

“Here an’ there…” he muttered, trying to calm himself by leaning against the doorframe, folding his arms across his chest, attempting to escape your eyes by looking around your room. 

“Here and there? That’s such a lie! He’d heard about your mutation, the shadow-casting thing was his idea!” Kitty grinned excitedly, and you all but choked on the realisation. He did this for you. He didn’t even know you, and he did this for you. 

“Kitty, that’s en–oof!” Logan barely had time to react before your arms were around his neck, your chin resting on his shoulder. Your scent hit him like a truck, and it was nothing like how he’d imagine it. Not that he had imagined it…

“Thank you,” you whispered earnestly, and any guard he’d put up previously melted away. He didn’t exactly return your embrace, but his hands somehow found your waist as you pulled back, keeping your arms across his shoulders. “Maybe I can forgive you for stealing my old room now. Oh! And my job. And not believing I exist,” your grin held more mischief than he ever thought possible, but now you were back to teasing, he felt his thoughts return. 

“Anythin’ else?” He asked, mirroring your expression.

“Not yet, but I’m sure I’ll think of something,” was it Logan’s sudden and overactive imagination, or did your eyes just flicker to his lips?

Was it the sudden physical contact that made your body hum this way, or was it just the fact that he could bench-press three of you? You didn’t care, and somehow, you didn’t think he did either. 

Until very suddenly and very abruptly, you did care. You stepped out of his hands far too quickly for his liking, your arms falling back by your sides. Though you didn’t look like you regretted anything. 

“I really appreciate this, from both of you. And whoever else helped. This is… well it’s better than what I was imagining,” you gestured to the room around you. It truly was perfect for you. They’d really outdone themselves. He’d really outdone himself. And you couldn’t help the warmth that spread from the centre of your chest to your limbs. You wanted to know more about him. “What’s your mutation, by the way? You never said,” you asked before you could stop yourself, and Logan blinked in surprise.

Holding his fist up, he flexed the tendons holding his claws. He no longer winced when his knuckles split. No longer grimaced as he sliced through his own flesh, though watching your face did cause him to worry just a little. 

You held your silence for a moment, not really knowing what to say. That looked painful as fuck, but you felt that asking might make it worse. “I see…” was all you said, before it hit you. “Wolverine! I get it now. It made sense before but now it actually fits!” You exclaimed, chuckling at his confusion. 

“Whaddya mean it made sense before?” 

“Don’t think too much into it,” you winked again, and Logan swore his heart stopped. 

“Yeah, alright Phantom.” He cocked a brow at the playful narrow of your eyes before you melted into the shadows right in front of him. He’d been made aware of your mutation, having overheard Jean using both you and Kitty as examples of phasing mutants, but to actually see it for himself? He couldn’t say he wasn’t impressed. He glanced around the room, retracting his claws as he looked for where you could have gone. 

“Get it now?”

Logan whipped around to see you standing behind him, arms folded across your chest, a mischievous grin plastered across your features. 

You always felt a sense of freedom when you released yourself into the shadows, like holding yourself in this corporeal state was somewhat of an effort. But letting yourself be free, to move like liquid amongst the darkness, it was like refueling a beaten truck. 

Logan’s lips quirked into a smile as he nodded once. “Got it,” the silence lingered once again, some kind of charge energy crackled in the space between the two of you before he cleared his throat. “Kitty, we should– the fuck?” 

You popped your head to the side, peering around Logan to see the space on your bed Kitty used to be sitting in was now completely empty. “Guess she left,” you shrugged. “Or she never existed.” That earned you a flick to the forehead from Logan, and you laughed, batting away his hand. How long had it been since you’d felt this comfortable with someone this quickly? Either it had been years, or never. 

“I’ll leave you to it,” he smiled, this time completely unrestrained. And fuck was he gorgeous. But you had to remember this was a man you’d just met. 

He had to remember this was a woman he’d just met.

“Yeah, thanks. I’ll uh, see you later?” You didn’t mean for your voice to sound so hopeful at the end, but honestly? It was worth seeing him turn back to you with that same smirk you’d seen countless times already.

“Sure.” He said, before closing the door. 

You sat heavily on your bed, your head in your hands. “What the fuck?” 

Little did you know, Logan was having a similar reaction right outside your door, his back against the wood as he pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. “What. The. Fuck?”

Having almost drowned yourself in the shower, using that shampoo you’d missed so dearly on your travels, you’d changed clothes into something a lot more comfortable, a loose pair of sweats and a spaghetti strap tank top, before heading down to Xavier’s office where he’d just spent the last ten minutes explaining his plans to further your mutation. And to be completely honest with yourself, you hadn’t listened to half of it. 

“So, in short, your ability, whilst appearing similar to Kitty’s, is actually entirely different. Where Kitty phases through objects, you become those shadows. Your molecules break down completely, unlike Miss Pryde.” He finished his explanation slowly, and you didn’t have the heart to tell him you had no idea what he’d just said. Luckily, when conversing with a telepath, you didn’t have to.

Charles sighed, rubbing his forehead slightly. “You’ve always said you felt a strain on yourself whilst corporeal, yes?” He asked, and you breathed in relief. Finally, a question you could answer.

“Yeah, it’s like I’m holding water with my bare hands. Or something like that,” you nodded, looking at yourself slightly curiously. “So, I’m not like Kitty?” you clarified, looking back up the the professor, who shook his head. 

“I’m afraid not. We were mistaken before, simply assuming you were just another phasing mutant. But Jean ran some tests on your blood, and it was quite remarkable.” You’d almost forgotten the woman was in the room until she cleared her throat, her red hair pulled up in a tight ponytail. 

“I think you describe it perfectly. Your molecules are being held together, more or less, by string, or so to speak. Not real string, but I think you understand.” You nodded. You actually did understand, because that’s how you constantly felt. It was, however, incredibly unnerving. What would happen if that string frayed? Or worse, fucking snapped altogether? Sensing your distress, Charles covered your hand with his own.

“My dear, that’s why we brought you back. We’ve been incredibly lucky so far, and clearly, you have an innate ability to control the string. It’s led us to believe that your abilities don’t stop at shadow walking.” He looked at you with understanding as you took this all in. He’d mentioned to you previously that he thinks you could do more. 

“Shadow manipulation, right?” You asked though the question was rhetorical. You knew that’s where they were going with this. Charles glanced at Jean who nodded in confirmation. 

“Essentially, yes. We think you could pull shadows from an already existing cast and wield them to your heart’s content. In… theory.” She hesitated, and you blew out a breath.

“But in practice?”

“In practice… honestly we don’t know. It will be a learning curve for all of us, to be blunt.” You nodded a little numbly. You’d only just returned and already you were being bombarded with hard truths. 

Once again sensing your distress, Charles cleared his throat. “Well, I think we should continue this discussion tomorrow. You’ve had a long day and perhaps right now isn’t the best time to be entertaining new ideas.” He threw another look to Jean and she nodded again, standing from her seat.

You couldn’t agree more. This was a lot to take in. Especially since you’d become so comfortable with your mutation, believing that you were just another phaser like Kitty. But now, you were something else completely, something unknown. Even to yourself. It… scared you. And you didn’t scare easily. Worry? Sure. Impending sense of dread? Absolutely. Fear? Never.

“Right. Thanks, Professor. I’ll uh, see you tomorrow then.” You dipped your head goodbye, before leaving his office and closing the door behind you. Tea. You needed tea. Fuck you needed something stronger than tea, but since this was a goddamn school, alcohol was strictly prohibited. 

Fuck’s sake. 

Dragging a hand down the side of your face, you absently made your way to the kitchen and flicked on the kettle. Muscle memory guided you to the drinks cupboard, moving aside the jar of decaff coffee to reveal your personal stash of teabags. Whilst primarily you were a coffee drinker, when it was this late in the evening, you tended to steer clear of the caffeine. You weren’t the best at sleeping to begin with, let alone when your mind and body were buzzing. 

You didn’t turn when you heard footsteps behind you, and the scrape of one of the chairs against the wooden floor, too focussed on rifling through the cupboard adjacent to the drinks one for our favourite mug. A gift from Kitty, she’d had custom-made for the print on the side to say ‘Phasers Forever!’. It made you a little sad to think about now. But, thankfully you found it, nestled right at the back next to the mug you’d gifted her. Also custom-made, but this just had the image of two hands with their little fingers linked. You’d made sure the gloves matched the ones you both wore in your suits. 

Dropping the teabag into the mug, you instantly savoured the scented steam as you poured the hot water, even the aroma calming your slightly frayed nerves. Wow, that meeting had seriously rattled you. Looping the string and tag over the lip of the mug, you turned back to the room, only to almost drop your freshly made drink in surprise.

Logan. Hair slightly damp, in a white v-neck tank, sat at the far end of the table, leaning back in the chair with a bottle of what you could have sworn was larger in his bear paw of a hand. That same fucking smirk pulled at his lips. 

“Phantom.” He raised his bottle in greeting. You wished you could match his energy, but honestly, you were drained from the day and the meeting. But you tried nonetheless.

“Wolvie.” You smiled back, though you could feel it didn’t reach your eyes. And clearly, he noticed too, expression shifting from self-assured confidence to slight concern.

“You alright?” Logan had only known you for less than a day, and he already knew he really didn’t like seeing you despondent. 

“Yeah, fine.” It almost pained him physically seeing your eyes remain dull with your liar’s smile. That was something else he realised in that split second. 

He really didn’t like you lying to him.

“Uh huh?” Fuck, he definitely knew you were hiding everything. How the fuck could he possibly tell that? He didn’t even know you! You sighed heavily, hoping it would help your next half-truth.

“I’m just tired. Long day, lots of emotions. Are you hungry? I’m starved and was gonna make pasta if you wanted some,” You tried your best to steer the conversation away from how you were feeling. Once again it wasn’t exactly a lie. You were starving, having not eaten since this morning, and it was now ten in the evening. 

Logan knew you turned away quickly so you didn’t have to see his suspicion. If you weren’t ready to talk about whatever was bothering you, he knew he shouldn’t push. But, to his surprise, he found himself wanting to know. He wanted to know what was up, and maybe, just maybe, he could make you feel better. It seemed doubtful, but it was worth a shot. “How was your meeting with Charles?”

Your shoulders tensed, spine straightening. Gotcha.

“Yeah, fine. Just easing me back into life here basically. Nothing earthshattering.” Now that was a flat out lie, and once again you refused to turn around as you brought the kettle over to the tap, filling it to the max line before placing it back on the stand and flicking the switch. You found it easier to lie when you were busy doing something else and making pasta seemed perfect. Crouching to one of the lower cupboards, you pulled out the pack of wholewheat, refusing to eat any of the sugary white bullshit. Unfortunately, the one downside of busying yourself so remarkably well was that you weren’t always paying attention to what was going on around you.

For example, Logan walking up behind you to take the packet from your hand and place it on the counter. You turned, realising he’d given you minimal space to move. He was so close you could smell the gel he used in the shower. Woodsy and smoky, like a forest cabin. He smelt fucking great, but to be honest, you were too busy trying to avoid eye contact to care.

“S’that why you look like your pet just died?” You knew he was trying to be teasing, trying to lighten the mood, trying to create a comfortable environment for you to open up in, but you didn’t know him, and he didn’t know you. With a deep breath, you stepped to the side and out of his reach, opening the fridge to look for something to make a nice creamy sauce with.

“Look, Logan. I appreciate it, and what you’re trying to do, but at the same time, I don’t know you. And you don’t know me. So, and I mean this with the utmost respect, fucking drop it. I’m tired and I have genuinely had a long day, what more do you want me to say?”

Logan blinked. And blinked again for good measure. He wasn’t expecting you to be so sharp. He didn’t know why he wasn’t expecting it, but you really took him by surprise. That seemed to be all you were doing since the moment he met you. Though this one stung a little more than he cared to admit. “That might’ve been the nicest fuck off I’ve ever heard. But it was still a fuck off.” He shrugged. He knew deep down you were right. You didn’t know each other, and maybe was was expecting a little too much from a three-hour friendship. If he could even call it that. 

“I didn’t mean–” You turned back from the fridge just in time to watch his disappearing form leave through the door, hearing his footsteps recede back up the stairs. You cursed inwardly, hating yourself for how you handled the situation. Though, looking at the pasta on the counter, you had an idea as to how to fix some of this. 

It had been roughly half an hour since he’d left you in the kitchen, recognising you needed space, and in all honesty? Retreating to lick his own wounds. He didn’t know why he wanted you to open up so badly. It wasn’t like he had a long-lasting friendship with you. He met you today, for fuck’s sake. Only hours ago. Shit, this morning he still didn’t think you existed! Logan groaned at the memory of you shutting him down, wishing he’d handled the situation differently, and stopped prodding when he knew he should have. Fuck!

He’d just managed to resolve to come and talk to you, before there was a thump at his bedroom door, followed by another. That wasn’t any kind of fist knocking… 

With deliberate caution, Logan stood from his bed, shining claws sliding through his knuckles as he approached the door, only for his nerves to be calmed when a familiar scent wafted through the cracks in the door. He didn’t dare get his hopes up until he turned the handle, pulling the door open to reveal you, stood before him, two steaming plates of pasta held impressively in one hand, and two bottles of larger in the other, your foot raised to kick the door a third time. 

“Before you slam the door, I brought peace pesto pasta, homemade so you know it’s good.” You were honestly surprised he opened the door, though you eyed his claws cautiously. Who did he think it was?

Logan noticed your line of sight, retracting his claws to cross his arms, a brow raised. “Peace pesto pasta?”

You nodded. “Homemade, don’t forget.” Logan smiled slightly at the hope in your eyes. “And also beer so you physically can’t turn me down.” You raised the two bottles in your hand, and he sighed as if you were a nuisance. Unfortunately for him, that couldn’t be further from the truth. 

“Homemade peace pesto, beer, and…?” 

You stuck your tongue in your cheek. “An apology.” You reluctantly admitted, looking anywhere but his face. “Can I come in or are you gonna stare at me all evening? These aren’t the most balanced plates, been a while since I was a waitress so…” you mumbled in explanation, earning yourself a quizzical look.

“You were a waitress?”

“Yes and it was a long time ago but we can talk all about it if I can set these down somewhere they won’t fall on your feet,” you said hurriedly, borderline pleading with your eyes for him to let you in. It wasn’t as if he was about to say no, there was just something comical about the way you were managing to hold everything in your hands. 

With a click of his tongue, he gestured for you to enter with his head, closing the door behind you as you set one of the plates down on the window seat, rubbing the red skin of your arm where the hot plate had ever so slightly burned you. He instantly felt bad, crossing the room with the intention to take your arm to look at it before you stuck it into the shadow on the wall, removing it again to reveal your skin pristine again.

“It wasn’t that bad, just uncomfortable,” you shrugged, handing a plate and bottle to him. Logan shook his head at what he’d just seen, giving you a look of ‘fair enough’ before taking the plate and beer gratefully. How long had it been since someone cooked for him? Though you’d done it as a peace offering, it still warmed his heart slightly. That and the fact it smelt fucking divine. 

“I’m sorry…” you started, mindlessly poking your pasta around your plate with your fork after making yourself comfortable on his window seat. He guessed it used to be your window seat, but it still made him happy how comfortable you looked. “The Professor told me something in the meeting and… rattled me, that’s all,” you shrugged, popping a few pieces of green pasta into your mouth and chewing thoughtfully. 

Logan decided to wait for you to continue, cracking open the bottle top of his beer with his teeth. Raising a brow as you looked over at him in slightly disturbed awe. 

“How did you not just break your jaw?” you asked, flabbergasted at his seemingly endless pool of abilities. 

“Not much can break it, considering my skeleton’s adamantium.” Logan was starting to like when you gaped at him in shock, admiring the way you jaw went completely slack, eyes wide. 

“Wait, how don't you– ohhhhh…” It had taken you a while to notice just how much the bed dipped when he sat down. No wonder he was so ripped, he had to be that strong in order to fucking walk around. “Any other secrets you're hiding?” You asked, before instantly regretting the question when his eyes met yours.

“You wanna talk about keeping secrets now?” He asked curtly.

“Walked into that one…”

“Yeah, you kinda did.” 

You sighed, fiddling with the bottle cap of your beer. Not to remove it, just to feel the sensation of the almost serrated edges helped to ground yourself. 

“You know about my mutation, the whole shadow-walking thing?” You asked, to which Logan responded with a nod, finally taking a bite of the pasta you’d made. Your heart swelled with pride as he paused, looking from the food to you with an impressed smile. “So, turns out, it’s nothing like Kitty’s. It’s not phasing like we originally thought, but something totally different.” You started to explain to an intensely listening Logan. “Kitty phases through things. I actually become the shadows I enter. Like, it’s not still my body but just in the shadow, my molecules break down to literally be the shadow,” you could tell he was trying to understand, his head tilting slightly to the side in a way you genuinely found cute. “It’s like, I’m holding water in my bare hands,” you started to demonstrate, placing your plate and bottle down beside you to cup your hands in front of you. “And this, this is my body. My corporeal body. But, when I dive into shadows, that body breaks down,” your cupped hands splayed apart, fingers spread to simulate a liquid splash. Logan nodded thoughtfully through mouthfuls of pasta. “How Jean explained it was that my molecules are held together with some kind of thread, and I control that thread, but it’s a constant strain… Like, I can feel my body being held together. And it just… I don’t know. It scared me I guess.”

The room fell into silence as you finished your explanation, Logan setting his somehow clean plate to the side, leaning his elbows against his spread knees, beer bottle clasped in both hands. “I uh, don’t really understand what’s scary bubs, sounds like this is an opportunity to develop it, right?” he asked, eyes searching your face for any sign you were reassured.

You sighed, the back of your head softly hitting the wall behind you. “Well apparently we’ve been lucky so far, and my control over this string or thread or whatever the fuck is stronger than they thought but… I don’t know, I guess what first went through my mind was what would happen if the thread snapped. Would I just stop being able to shadow walk or–”

“Would you stop altogether, and be able to do nothing but shadow walk,” Logan finished, realisation dawning on his gruff features. You nodded slightly, not wanting to speak anything into existence. 

“Exactly.” You whispered, staring into your borderline untouched pasta. You honestly didn’t know what to do, and you didn’t know what could be done. Surely, at this point, it was just a matter of time, right? The thought hit you like a lightning bolt. If it was just a matter of time, you just burdened this poor man, who you’d only met hours ago, with the knowledge that, eventually, you were likely just simply dissolve into nothing, cursed to live forever in the shadows of others. “Anyway, yeah, that’s why I had a face like, how did you put it? Like my pet just died,” You did your best to imitate his voice, hoping to shit it would lighten the mood of the room, but it only earned you a look of sympathy.

Fucking sympathy. You hated sympathy.

You’d come in here in the hopes to make things right with him and apologise for how you were earlier, but the one thing you really didn’t want, and never fucking wanted, was sympathy. You sighed heavily, preparing yourself for whatever ‘I’m so sorry this is happening speech’ he was clearly getting ready to spill. 

But for the umpteenth time in the short while you’d known him, Logan surprised you. Taking your bottle of beer from your side, he cracked the lid off with his teeth, the same as before, before handing it back to you. You, as stunned as you were, managed to take it from his hand, the soft skin of your fingertips brushing the backs of his own. You smiled in resignation, raising your bottle in some tragic excuse of a toast. ‘To the inevitable’ you wanted to say, but you physically bit your tongue before taking a long sip of the slightly bitter liquid.

“It won’t come to that,” you’d forgotten, in the period of silence, that you were waiting for him to say something. You tilted your head in confusion, and it honestly took all of Logan’s willpower not to launch into you and wrap you up in his arms. He really needed to pull himself together. “Look, I was pretty fuckin’ helpless when I came here. And I know you remember the state Marie was in. Neither of us thought we were worth savin’, but look at us now,” in complete honesty, Logan still didn’t think he was worth saving, but that was neither here nor there. “He’ll help ya. You’ll get this under control. And it ain’t all bad. He already said you had more control than he thought,” You could feel his eyes search your face as you closed yours. Maybe he was right. Charles had said you had more control over these strings than he thought. 

Logan was right. That was a good thing.

“Well, we’ll see tomorrow. That’s when we really start everything. We have another meeting before we’re straight into training, seeing if we can really develop this mutation before I cease to exist. No pressure right?” You half-joked, your lips quirking up into what you hoped was a smile. Or, at least, a lopsided one. 

Fuck he wanted to kiss you. Kiss you. When the hell was the last time he’d felt like this toward anyone? He hadn’t wanted to kiss anyone in goddamn years, and here you were, a woman he didn’t even believe existed a few hours ago, waltzing into his life and making him feel things like wanting to fucking kiss you. 

“I uh… ya know I wanted to apologise too.”

Well, that caught you off guard. “Wh– wait what? Why? What for?” you couldn’t help firing off questions at speeds you didn’t know you were capable of, utter bafflement contorting your features. 

“You were right. I don’t know you. And you don’t know me.” Logan watched as your face transformed from confusion, to hurt, to acceptance. 

“Yeah…. I did say that didn’t I? I–”

“But,” he interrupted, stopping you mid-sentence. “That doesn’t mean I don’t wanna know ya…” Logan almost laughed aloud at how your eyes went comically wide. Did you know how cute you were? When you weren’t telling him to fuck off, that is.

“I– Uh, okay, sure… what d’ya wanna know?” you asked, hoping to fuck you didn’t sound ridiculous. If you didn’t, Logan didn’t seem to mind or care. 

“You can start of by tellin’ me how or where you learned to cook so well,” you scoffed loudly, rolling you eyes. “Nah I’m serious kid, that was fuckin’ great,” Logan leaned against the headboard, an arm positioned behind his head as you too made yourself comfortable again on the window seat, resting your elbow on your raised knee.

“Kid? Do you know how old I am?” you asked, smirking slightly. Though you were a little embarrassed, there was no way you’d show it. Kid? Did he seriously think you were that young? 

“Do you know how old I am?” he retorted, that same self-assured glint dancing in his eye. You peered at him in scrutiny, emphasising how hard you were looking at him by squinting intensely.

“I’d put you at around like, early thirties? Maybe mid? Am I hot or cold?” you asked, kinda hoping he was in the same sort of age bracket as you were. Not for any specific reason of course… just for… science.

Yeah. For science.

Though your heart deflated slightly at his bark of a laugh. “Not quite. Try mid to late hundred and thirties. Give or take a few years.” Once again you gaped at him, mouth wide open, jaw completely slack. He could get used to that sight. Dangerously used to it. “Take a picture bubs, it’ll last longer.”

“B-but… how–? Y–? Hundred and– what the fuck?” You couldn’t get over it. Though your mind was still reeling, you managed to recover quickly. “Why you don’t look a day over ninety. You’re in good shape for a fossil, though I was wondering why I was getting a lot of calls from museums recently… probably looking for their exhibit back,” you smirked wildly whilst Logan just stared at you, trying his fucking damnest not to let his disobedient lips quirk anywhere other than down. 

“Ya done?”

“I’ll probably think of some more. But, in all seriousness, how?” You asked, and Logan couldn’t detect anything other than genuine curiosity.

“Regenerative. I heal real quick, but that also keeps my body in good condition. Dunno exactly how old I am, but it’s around hundred and thirty,” he shrugged, and you whistled lowly. “So?” he prompted, and you looked up.

“So what?”

“How’dya make the pasta?” 

You snorted in amusement, before launching into an explanation about your brother and how he always had an interest in cooking and had taught you to cook simple things, like how to make a béchamel sauce, or how to make pesto from scratch. And if you weren’t so caught up in your storytelling, you would have noticed Logan drinking in every damn word like he was parched for conversation. Listening to you talk, the cadence of your voice, the way you pronounce every letter and the way you occasionally drop a letter, it was hypnotic. You didn’t have an abundance of energy, and whether that was simply because you were exhausted after the day you’d had, or if that was just who you were, he didn’t know. But honestly? He didn’t really care. 

As long as you kept talking, that was all that mattered. If he could take your mind off tomorrow, or your situation by letting you ramble about the smallest of things, he would. And he would pretend the whole time like he was doing this for you. And not because, at the end of everything, he liked listening to you. 

“Anyway, that’s how you tell the difference between a Thoroughbred and a Quarter Horse. And I will not make that mistake again.” You’d somehow weaved from topic to topic, the conversation ebbing and flowing for hours, you both taking turns in sharing random stories from your pasts, little anecdotes that gave context to who you both were as people now. And it was only thanks to the brief silence and the conveniently timed chime of the clock did you realise how late it was. Or rather, how early.

It was one in the fucking morning. How the hell did that happen? Your eyes slid back to Logan, who at some point had made himself comfortable on the opposite side of the window seat, and you watched as he had the same realisation. Holy shit.

“I should probably–”

“Look, you should–”

You both started to speak at the same time, before pausing to let the other talk first. It was gross and awkward and cringey but, for the life of you, you couldn’t find it in you to care. 

You stood, gathering your long abandoned, though now empty plate, and crossed the room to grab his from the bedside table. You heard Logan sigh heavily behind you in what you assumed was exhaustion. You couldn’t blame the man. You’d been talking for hours. 

Logan followed you to the door, holding it open for you as you stepped out into the hallway. You placed the crockery onto the floor, freeing your hands to wrap your arms around his neck in a similar embrace to the one before. Only this time, you felt his strong arms return your hug, wrapping you up tightly against his chest.

“Thank you. For letting me talk for hours. You don’t need to pretend you enjoyed it, by the way. But thank you all the same.” You stepped back, and Logan leaned against the door frame, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Yeah well, you brought peace pesto and beer. How could I say no?” He quipped, and you chuckled lightly. He wasn’t about to admit he enjoyed your company far more than he should have done, and he sure as shit wasn’t about to admit he wasn’t pretending to like it. His eyes softened at your laugh in a way he’d stopped them from doing all evening. “I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”

You peered up at him, a knowing spark dancing in your iris. You noticed. Of course, you’d noticed. That was almost exactly what you’d said to him earlier. The same hopeful lilt and all. 

“Sure.” Was all you said in return, before picking up the empty plates and bottles off the floor, and turning away to head back down the hallway. You refused to look back, worried that if you did, you’d run straight back to his room and never fucking leave.

But if you had. If you had just turned to look over your shoulder, you would have seen him leaning against the doorway still, eyes following you down the stairs, and lingering still, long after you’d disappeared.

Yeah… he was definitely in trouble.

[moremaybank]

INNOCENCE + STEPCEST — r.c

pairing rafe cameron x step-sister!reader

warnings unprotected sex, fingering, slight (??) oral sex (fem. receiving), stepcest (obvi), innocence kink, loss of virginity, rafe has a daddy kink, language/dirty talk

author's note i'm so sorry for the wait on this, but i hope it was worth it ♡︎

kinktober masterlist ;; rafe masterlist

⋆༺♱༻⋆

Rafe’s hot breath on your skin made the hairs on the back of your neck rise, and goosebumps started to form in response. His fingers pulled at the strings of your dress, loosening the straps so he could gently tug them down your shoulders. He littered wet kisses there as his nose took in your scent. 

Sweet, hypnotizing, you.

“You’re so beautiful, princess,” he breathed, turning you around to face him. His warm palms brushed over your covered nipples, feeling them perk up beneath his touch. Your breath grew shaky as his hands trailed down your sides, skimming over your waist, hips and thighs. They slipped underneath the bottom of your dress, teasing the waistband of your panties. “So pure.” 

“Rafe, we shouldn’t.” Your voice trembled and you shivered. “It’s not right.” 

“It is, baby. It is right. You just don’t know it yet.”

You watched Rafe crouch down, raising the bottom of your dress above your hips. His nose traced your slit, feeling the soft cotton and lace fabric rubbing against it. He inhaled deeply, eyes rolling back as he savoured it. Pulling the thin number down your legs, he let them pool around your ankles before helping you step out of them. He pocketed them, saving them for later when he couldn’t have you with him, under him. 

“I don’t know what I’m doing,” you murmured timidly. Your cheeks were hot to the touch, and the nerves were taking over. Rafe was gorgeous. Dangerous and thrilling, so much so that you didn’t know what to do with yourself when you were around him. He made you feel things you hadn’t known to exist, a million different feelings flooding you and leaving you breathless.

“That’s okay, sweet girl. I’ll show you.” He rose back onto his feet, his hands now finding your face. He peered down into your eyes. “Bet you haven’t even touched yourself, have you? Don’t even know all the ways I’m gonna make you feel good.” 

Rafe’s hands stripped you of your dress, casting it away on the floor. His blue eyes lit up once he got a look at your body, stripped and completely bare before him. His hands moved delicately, brushing over your tits and stomach so lightly that you shivered. Then his touch dipped, ghosting over the front of your core. You trembled, slightly shocked, and a smile tugged at the corners of Rafe’s lips. 

“You’re like a doll. Dainty and soft and gentle. And if I’m not careful,” he pauses, his bottom lip sinking between his teeth momentarily, “I could break you.” 

You gulped, feeling the blood rush to your poor, untouched pussy. It throbbed at his words, his tone, hell, just him in general. But you were puzzled. You’d heard the rumours constantly circling the island about him. Rafe Cameron, Kook Prince. He could have anyone he wished. So, why did he want you?

“Rafe?” You voiced out, quiet as a mouse.

His head ducked down, and he dragged his lips across your clavicle, up your neck to the base of your jaw. He inhaled deeply, drinking in your fragrance again as he hummed in response. “Hm?”

“Why me?”  

Rafe pulled away from you, looking down into your eyes so deeply as if he was trying to hypnotize you. He probably could manage to do so, looking and speaking the way he did. But he guided your hand to the prominent bulge he was sporting, helping you rub on him gently. His broad chest rose as he sucked in a breath, eyes fluttering at the contact. 

“You see how hard you make me, sweet girl?” You managed to give him a nod, unsure if your voice was even still present. “You drive me insane, and I don’t even think you know it. Always wearin’ those short little skirts and dresses, smelling so damn good. At first, I thought you were just being coy, but now I know…you’re just innocent. Pure and clean. And baby, that just makes me want to ruin you. Do you want me to ruin you?” 

“Please,” you breathed. 

“Please what, baby? You want daddy to get you nice and dirty? Ruffle those perfect feathers?” 

You nodded again. “Yes.” 

“Say it. Say it for me.”

“Please make me dirty. I wanna be dirty for you, Rafe.” 

“Daddy,” he corrected. His hand found your throat, cupping it at first before squeezing a tad. “Not Rafe. Daddy.” 

“Please make me dirty, daddy.” 

“Good girl.” 

Rafe led you backward until the backs of your knees hit the edge of the mattress. He instructed you to lie down but prompted you to stay up on your elbows so you could watch him. “Eyes on me. Want you to watch, so every time you look down here, you’ll remember that I’m the only one who makes you feel good. Got it, angel?” 

“Yes, daddy,” you agreed. 

“See? Such a good girl already, listening to me and doing everything I say.” Rafe sunk to his knees again, using his large palms to urge your thighs apart. His fingers massaged your sensitive skin, inching closer to your core with each movement. His lips followed, leaving a trail of wet kisses up your flesh. When he reached your core, he let his tongue trace feather-light lines around you, letting his hot breath fan over your most intimate places. Then he upgraded to licking stripes through your folds. He flicked his tongue over your clit softly, watching you squirm for him at the foreign feeling. 

You felt hot, could feel the heat pricking at your skin and the nerves bubbling in your stomach. You weren’t quite sure of the ache in your core, or sure of what all these surfacing feelings for Rafe meant. But you knew without any doubt that you needed him in ways you couldn’t even comprehend. The thought of partaking in an act that you definitely shouldn’t have been, with someone equally as forbidden pulled at you. Reeled you in and promised not to release you if you didn’t explore it. 

Rafe’s thumb started to rub circles into your bundle of nerves, and he watched your mouth gape open. Your chest heaved as you kept your eyes trained on his actions. You let out a soft moan. 

“‘M warming you up, sweetheart. That feel good?” 

“So good,” you exhaled. “More, please.” 

“Yeah? You think you can handle it?” His hand came up to the seam of your lips, and he nudged his middle finger into your mouth as he ordered you to suck. You did, lathering his digit up in your spit. He gave you another crooked smile when he withdrew it from your mouth, and brought it down to your entrance, running through the slick seeping from you. He probed his finger, pushing in ever so slightly and revelling in the breathy moan that escapes you. Slowly, he slides inside, not stopping until he’s knuckle-deep. Your walls welcome him in, the fit tight and snug. “So tight, princess. Squeezin’ me so tight, and that’s just my finger.” 

You already felt an inexplicable feeling in your belly, barely there but beginning to rumble when he started to push in and out of you. A string of whines falls from your lips as he continues his work, each intrusion more euphoric than the last. His thumb brushes over your clit, starting to stimulate it again. 

“I want you to cum, baby. Can you do that for me?” He hooked the finger inside you, hitting a sweet spot inside of you and turning you into putty. He took your cries of pleasure as a yes and swapped out his thumb for his tongue. He lapped at you while speeding up his fingers, and eventually, you erupted. Your release gushed out of you, the warm, glowy feeling rushing through your body. The fine hairs on your skin stood high, your shivering sprouting them up, and you sunk into the mattress as you tried to catch your breath.

What Rafe had done to you was a rush. The way you felt was addicting, and you never wanted the pleasure to stop. You only wanted more. You couldn’t bring yourself to dwell on how wrong it was, because how could something so fucked up feel like heaven to you? 

You pawed at him, trying to get his attention. “I want more. Want you.” 

“I’m right here, princess. My finger’s still inside you. ‘N my mouth’s about to be back on you.”  

“You know what I mean,” you spoke, biting back a whine. You could see the ‘cat got the cream’ expression painted on his face. He knew you craved more than just his fingers or even his mouth. But he wanted to hear the filthy words on your tongue. 

“You can say it, sweet girl,” he encouraged. “Tell me you want my cock.” 

Your eyes left his, feeling raw and exposed under his heated gaze. He was already turning you into someone you couldn’t recognize, but it was someone you wanted to be. You looked at him again, speaking up. “I want your cock, daddy.” 

“There’s my good girl,” Rafe grinned, quickly working to rid himself of his clothing. He urged you to scoot up on the mattress, and he followed you, lying you at the head of the bed. Your legs spread on their own accord, allowing Rafe to slot his body in between them. You both could feel the heat radiating off of each other’s flesh, the desire burning so brightly that it might even blind you. Hell, it already had blinded you. 

Rafe cupped your cheek gently and leaned in, finally letting his lips mould with yours. It started slow, but not devoid of passion. Then it deepened, and his tongue pushed its way into your mouth, licking at you and letting you taste the remnants of your sweet release that still lingered on him. He sucked on your tongue, the action sending more fire between your legs. He pulled away just slightly, enough to speak against your lips. 

“I’m gonna take this slow, sweetheart. All you have to do is sit there and look pretty for me, yeah?” 

“Yes, daddy,” you said, your doe eyes boring into his. 

The look on your face made Rafe’s head spin. You were a dizzying concoction of virtue and innocence, yet you were more than willing to be walked into the dark side by him. You would take his hand and let him tug you into the depths of hell and everything that accompanied it. He almost didn’t want to stain you, change you forever, but then he thought about how no one else had ever had you in a compromising position like this. No one had ever touched you or tasted you, or been inside of you the way he soon would be. And nothing would ever be great enough to make him walk away from that offer.

Drawing back from you, Rafe spat down onto your core, watching it dribble down your folds. He gripped his cock, guiding it through your folds to lube himself up. Unable to resist, he rutted his length against your clit, providing you both with some friction. He wanted you as wet as he could get you before he stretched you out, which wasn’t to say that you weren’t already dripping with both your arousal and release, but he wanted you on cloud nine when he finally buried himself inside you. 

“You ready, sweet girl?” His eyes found yours as his tip kissed your entrance. You nodded, giving him a yes as your hands ran up his forearms, bracing yourself. He pushed inside bit by bit, feeling the pure bliss of your tight, wet heat casing him in. It took everything in him not to slam inside of you because feeling you felt so damn good and he needed you fully wrapped around him. But still, he managed to take his time. 

Your body was tense, muscles clenching at the wide stretch of his intrusion. Your nails printed crescent shapes into his skin, and your eyes welled with tears. It stung, and Rafe noticed the pained look on your face.

“Hey,” he cooed, “Relax for me, yeah?” 

His fingers sought after your clit, massaging it the way he’d learned that you liked to relieve at least the tiniest bit of discomfort. He ducked his head down, letting his lips paint sweet kisses into the crook of your neck. He made his way up, eventually finding your mouth and kissing you as he finally bottomed out. The stimulation on your clit didn’t stop, only continued as you started to feel that pleasure inside. Rafe shifted, and the small movement filled you with butterflies. You looked up at him, eyes pleading silently as you moved your hips against him.

“Can I move, baby?” 

“Please.” 

He pecked your lips and began to pull out of you. He didn’t go too far before pushing in again, hearing you moan. He guided your legs around his waist, and you held him close, tighter and tighter as he continued thrusting into you. His lips peppered kisses anywhere they could reach, nibbling and sucking, licking, and whispering sweet words of praise as you took him. 

“You feel so good, princess. So fuckin’ tight, can barely take it.” 

Your hands moved from his arms, looping around the back of his neck as you stared up at him—the sight before you majestic. Rafe was undoubtedly perfect, so handsome and devilish. His lust lit his eyes up, making the blue orbs sparkle. His jaw was tense, bottom lip caught between his teeth as he took what he craved from you. His hands cascaded along your sides, squeezing your hips as he started to fuck you deeper, more calculated. His only goal was to turn you into putty in his hands, and he was far-past succeeding. 

“You like it, baby? Like the way I feel inside you?” He questioned. You whimpered out a yes, clutching onto him. “You gonna tell our parents how hard your big brother makes you cum?” 

Your walls started to clamp down on him, milking him as his words goaded you. 

“What about letting me fuck you while they’re home? Gonna have to be nice ‘n quiet if you don’t want them finding out about our little secret.”

Your cries had reached shameless heights, growing louder as the discomfort faded away completely. Rafe’s hands both cupped your face, holding your eyes on him as he wordlessly reminded you that he was the one responsible for the high you were riding. 

“Oh, baby,” he crooned. “You’re so beautiful. Knew it all this time. But you’re fuckin’ perfect while I’m fucking you.” 

The look on your face was pathetic, your brows pulled together and jaw slack as Rafe kept you locked in the intimate moment between you. He knew what he was doing, there was no doubt about it. He had you right where he wanted you, and to be honest, you didn’t want to be anywhere else. You now knew that all you needed was him. 

“You gonna cum for me, baby?” He nosed at your cheek, leaving a kiss there too. You couldn’t manage anything more than a mewl, and his head rose to look at you. His voice carried a soft tone as he spoke. “Tell me.” 

You felt his intense gaze trained on you, even as your eyes shut for a swift moment. He was waiting for your response as if the tell-tale signs your body was giving him weren’t enough confirmation. 

“‘M gonna cum, daddy. I’m close,” you croaked. “Please let me cum.”

“You got it, sweet girl. Go ahead. S’gonna feel so good, promise.” His forehead plastered against yours as his thrusts grew more selfish. Your orgasm shattered you into a million pieces, the rush eliciting the loud call of Rafe’s name. He nodded, letting you feel it. “That’s it. There we go. So good, princess. So damn good.” 

He twitched inside of you, right at the edge, about to fall over. “Gonna cum inside you. Gonna claim you. You’re mine, got it?” 

You nodded, eyes hooded and hazy as you tilted your head up to kiss him. 

“Tell me you’re mine, baby.” 

“Yours,” you repeated. “All yours.” 

Your words gave him the final push, and he came inside you. You felt the warmth of his cum painting your walls, and you clenched around him again when his groan filled your ears. He cussed loudly, and nothing had ever sounded better. 

“That’s right,” he spoke, going back to your conversation from earlier. “You’re mine. No one else will ever have you the way I do.”

⋆༺♱༻⋆

RAFE TAG LIST (JOIN HERE): @pankowperfection @maybankslover @bmo-bri @hemogloban @princessbetsy123-blog @slytherhoes @whoisdrewstarkey @dreamingwithrafe @vigilanteshitposting @softherveauxs @adoreyouusugar @f4ll-for-you @tell-me-when-ur-ready @bbycowboi @jjmaybankisbae @enhypens-hoe @loverofdrewstarkey @countryclubkook @earth2starkey @angelofcigs @belcalis9503 @em0-b0ysworld @koalalafications @aerangi @cantstoptheimagines @thatsthewaythechrissycrumbles @rafesthroatbaby @maybanksbabe @slut4drudy

[enhaheeseung]

Toxic - L. Heeseung

Pairing: heeseung X fem reader!

Warning: smut, unprotected sex, dirty talk, fingering, angst, cum eating, arguments, cursing, dry humping, multiple orgasms, mentions of cheating, crying, the words slut and whore are used.

Genre: ex’s, toxic relationship, smut, mdni!

WC:4,351k

“Knew you’d be here,” you hear an all too familiar voice say right beside your ear, and you can’t even react before his large arms encase your figure.

You jumped slightly and set your cup down on the kitchen counter, as well as the bottle of alcohol that you had been drinking that night.

With your shaky hands, you attempt to take his arms off you, but the effort is futile, and you end up resting your hands above his that lay on your waist.

“I waited a whole hour to finally get you alone, baby. Your friends were stealing you away from me,” he laughs softly, his warm breath tickling your neck. “But now,” he steps a bit closer, brushing himself against you, and you feel your knees grow weak as his bulge rests between your cheeks. “You’re all mine,” he nibbles on the tip of your ear, earning a quiet gasp from your beautiful lips.

“Hee,” he melts when you call him by the nickname you gave him all those years ago, chills running up his spine as he shudders against you, inhaling a sharp breath while subtly pressing his crotch on your backside.

He lowers his hands to your hips, gripping them firmly and pulling you against his chest, your body completely flush with his, leaving you no space and no choice but to feel the thick, pulsing outline of his stiffness.

You let go of his hands, letting him use your body as you clutched onto the kitchen counter to stabilize yourself, and you wish you could say you were doing this with him cause you’re drunk, but you’re far from that cause he came to you only a few shots in.

A part of you felt guilty for letting him back in so easily, but one touch from him and all rational thoughts were out the window. The only thing swirling in your brain right now was the thought of him laying you on your back, spreading you wide open, and taking every last ounce of dignity from you.

He smirks down at your connected bodies when you take matters into your own hands and grind your ass against his hard-on. “Let me take you home,” he whispers and taps your waist two times, momentarily knocking you out of your trance as you agree and let him guide you out of the party.

He feels lucky when he’s able to sneak by your friends. The last thing he needs is for them to interfere like before.

He took you to his car, the scent filling your nostrils and bringing back so many memories of the late-night drives or grocery runs you both used to go on back when your guy's relationship was healthy.

Without much thought he put the keys in the ignition and started his car driving back to your place based off nothing but muscle memory from all the times he used to pick you up for dates he looked to his right seeing you stare out the window and he can’t believe you’re actually sitting here with him right now after everything you guys have been through.

He puts his hand on your thigh and hides his smile when you jump slightly from his touch.

He sees you visibly relax, and he strokes your bare thigh with his thumb, inching his hand up higher and higher till he feels the warmth between your legs. He settles his hand there, kneading and tugging on the soft flesh, working you up for what’s about to come, and by the time you arrive home, your panties are completely drenched. You feel embarrassed for getting so turned on by a simple touch, but you can’t help it. You were undeniably addicted to your ex.

Guiding him upstairs to your apartment room feels all like a blur cause as soon as the door shuts, he’s got his hands all over you, groping every last inch of your skin as his lips press roughly against yours.

Taken aback by his ferocity, your hands clumsily find his strong back, using it as leverage to brace yourself for his hungry kisses. “Oh, heeseung,” you moan into his mouth, and he loves it as it gives him the perfect entrance to your warm, wet mouth. He slips his tongue inside with no permission, but he knows you’d never refuse any of his advances.

“Fuck” he whimpers when you run your fingers through his hair and tug harshly on the roots.

He stumbles his way over to your bedroom, your lips never disconnecting for even a moment as you both discard your shoes somewhere neither of you is even concerned with right now.

Leaning back to finally catch a breather, your eyes flutter open, and he smiles softly while stroking your cheek with his thumb, admiring your beauty up close after so long.

He trails his hands down to your waist, gripping the hem of your shirt, and with your help, he lifts it over your head smoothly, tossing it to the ground.

His hands move to your back, unclasping your bra effortlessly as if you two had just done this yesterday. “Missed this,” he mumbles softly at the sight of your breast, his big hands automatically cupping them, thumbs brushing softly on your nipples as they harden under his sensual touch.

“Mmph,” You bite your lip from the sensation, your hands lowering to the button on his pants, popping it open, and lowering the zipper on his jeans. As soon as you take your hand off his zipper, you cup the pulsing bulge inside his pants, squeezing him softly and taking his breath away.

“Oh my god,” he breathes out, looking down at your hand stroking his throbbing length. “Y/n,” he throws his head back, eyes falling shut from the pleasure as his tip continues to leak and soak straight through his underwear.

You take the open opportunity to attach your lips to his neck placing the most softest kisses he’s ever felt on his skin.

He tilts his head to the side, making it easier for you to kiss and mark up his neck while you jerk off his cock faster. “If you keep doing that, I’m gonna cum” he whispers, eyes still closed, showing zero restraint to the upcoming pleasure despite wanting to make you finish first.

You slow your movements, giving him a break, and he makes the most of it as he gently grips your waist and lays you in your bed.

He does the rest of the work and takes his pants off before getting on the bed and looming over you to take your pants off as well. You assist him by lifting your hips and letting him peel the jean material from your legs, leaving you in only your underwear as he throws your jeans off the bed. “You’re so beautiful,” he says while tracing your inner thighs with his fingertips, your skin forming goosebumps from his teasing touch.

Removing his hands from your skin, he slowly opens his blue flannel one button at a time, watching your eyes become filled with desire with each one he unfastens.

Your legs spread apart just a bit, but it doesn’t go unnoticed by him, and he can tell how much you want him when you grip the sheets and writhe on the bed beneath him, desperate for him to do something.

And he does. He lays beside you, his left hand running along your clothed cunt. “Hee,” you breathe out, arching into his touch and trying to lift your hips to meet his movements.

He presses a bit harder, adding more friction for your pleasure, and he lowers his face to your chest, taking your perked nipple into his mouth and sucking on it softly as he looks up at you, eyes blown wide as if he’s waiting for some kind of approval.

Slipping your panties to the side, his thick fingers come in contact with your bare cunt for the first time tonight, and he runs his digits through your drenched folds tapping your clit gently and rubbing the wetness all over your mound.

Humming against your chest, he slowly eases his finger inside you, taking your breath away.

You grip his wrist for some kind of support as he gently fucks his finger into your heat, little moans slipping past your lips.

He adds a second finger in you stretching your hole open, his thumb circling your clit in soft circles.

Releasing your nipple with a quiet pop, he kisses around the erect bud, placing soft kisses all over your plush breast.

“So good.” You don’t want to let him know he still has this much power over you, but the way his fingers work inside you makes it impossible.

“Yeah? You feel good, baby?” He lays his tongue flat against your chest, licking every inch within his reach, his fingers gradually picking up the pace as he curls them and starts rubbing that spot he memorized all those years ago. It was still carved on his brain despite your guy's separation.

His left leg hooks over yours, his obvious hard-on rubbing against your thigh as he absentmindedly humps your leg. “Ah ah,” he moans shakily, his wet tip getting stimulated by the softness of your thigh.

The action only turns you on more, and the feeling of his scorching length throbbing against your thigh while he pumps your wet walls has you clenching so tightly around his fingers, letting him know you’re not far off. “Hee close, so close,” your arch, your back further into his touch, eyes squeezing shut as you lose yourself in the pleasure of an orgasm that you dreamed of every night since the breakup.

“I know, baby.” he pecks your chest, rutting faster against your thigh, creating more friction the closer you get. “You gonna cum for me?” He whines out, his own orgasm creeping up on him suddenly.

“Yes,” you nod your head over and over, looking down at where his hand was pleasuring you in ways you couldn’t imagine. “Cumming” you helplessly choked out, legs shaking uncontrollably as you had your first orgasm in years.

“That’s it,” he whispers against your ear. “My girl cumming so hard around my fingers” he softly kisses the shell of your ear, his hot breath heightening every last little spark of hot pleasure you felt. “Give it to me, all of it.” The feeling doesn’t fade, and it seems like your high was dragging on forever. Just seconds later, you feel another rush of pleasure flow through you, and a second orgasm comes crashing down around you unexpectedly.

His thumb works gently on your clit as a warm liquid squirts out from between your legs the wet sounds loud and sloppy as his fingers fuck your cunt till you give him everything. “Oh my god, heeseung fuck” you moan loudly, your body quivering in the aftermath as little wet splashes stain your bed as well as heeseung’s hand, but he loves it the way you’re literally wetting yourself all because of him.

“I got you” he nudges your face with his nose, slowly riding your high out until you’ve given him every last ounce out of your perfect pussy. “Baby, you’re so wet you’re dripping on me,” he says in a daze, soaking up the image of you wet and shaking with pleasure when you come back down from that indescribable experience you hid your face in his neck, feeling embarrassed by how your body reacted to him.

He pulls his fingers out of your stretched hole, your squirt running down his wrist as he slurps your cum off his fingers.

The front of his underwear was covered in translucent precum, and he felt like he couldn’t wait for another second to be inside you, especially when he rested on his knees and saw the creamy substance leaking from your entrance. He just knew it was going to feel like absolute heaven to be inside you again.

He quickly pulled down his boxers, revealing his hard veiny cock to your desired-filled eyes as you lay there just waiting for him to fully undress.

On second thought, you couldn’t wait. His underwear only made it to his ankles before you sat up and gripped his shoulders, maneuvering him on the bed, so now he was sitting against the bed frame.

You immediately sat on his lap, circling your hips as your wet panties brushed against his leaky dick. “Condom?” You wrapped your arms around his neck and positioned yourself to ride his thick cock.

He shakes his head back and forth. “mm mmm.” he really didn’t have one because he was not expecting tonight to go like this. “But we don’t need one, baby. Let me fill you up.” he caresses your arms up and down. “Know you love it when I cum inside it” he squeezes your arms a bit more tightly, letting his possessive side take over.

This should have been a red flag for you, but at the moment, it was so hot that it clouded your better judgment, and the idea of him filling your hole with his hot cum and claiming you as his had your brains turned to mush and by the look on your face you didn’t even have to give him an answer for him to know you wanted it too.

You lifted your hips up, and he pushed your panties to the side, giving him just enough access to your little hole. He gripped the base of his cock, putting the tip in and giving you that nice little stretch before pushing in a bit more. “Oh,” you moan, rolling your head back as he spreads you open with his dick.

“Oh fuck god, y/n,” he whines, his hands rushing to your sides to grip onto something to ground himself.

You gently sat down, careful not to overwhelm him. You bounced lightly on it, getting both of you used to the sensation, and naturally, as it started to feel better and better, it wasn’t long before you were sunken down all the way on him, his tip touching your cervix as your pussy lips kissed his full balls.

“Kiss me.” his breath was heavy, eyes barely open, as he tilted his head up, waiting for your lips to touch his.

You ran your fingers through his hair, bringing his face closer, zeroing in on his perfect pink lips and connecting them together.

You can feel him twitch inside the moment you stick your tongue in his mouth. He moans quietly, feeling breathless from your kiss, his fingertips pressing harshly into your side, and you completely take his breath away when you start riding his long cock.

His mouth falls open, and the kiss is no longer a kiss. It’s just you licking, sucking, and biting every inch of his mouth.

You feel the grip on your waist loosen, and he becomes limp, his fingers lifelessly resting on your thighs as you bounce up and down up and down.

The sound of your skin clapping against his, mixed with the obscene wet sounds between your conjoined bodies, makes his head spin.

His heart pounds wildly in his chest, his eyes glossy with pleasure as you fuck your cunt on his cock.

You leaned back eyes fluttering open and you stare into his love filled ones biting your lip and tilting your head to the side using every last ounce of energy to ride him. “I-“ he tried to speak, but nothing came to his mind. He was too overwhelmed with the feeling to form a coherent thought.

“Feels good, huh?” You say through a heavy breath as he nods frantically.

“Yes, so good, please, y/n,” he whimpers and presses his face to your chest, messily licking and sucking the flesh, the warmth of his tongue making your nipples grow hard. “Please, I’m so close, y/n you’re gonna make me cum”

“Okay, baby,” you kissed the top of his head, and the warmth he felt inside of him was nothing like nothing before the softness mixed with the pleasure was all it took for him to let go. “Fill me up, hee, make me yours.” You don’t even know what you’re saying, but right now, it feels right. “Only want you.”

“Me too,” he whines out, muscles tensing as he releases himself within your heat, filling you up just the way you wanted. “Mine all mine,” he grunts out every word with each rope of cum that stains your warm insides. “All fucking mine,” his words shoot straight to your core, your cunt clenching around him, milking his creamy seed until you are stuffed to the brim with white hot cum.

He starts thrusting up from below you, his balls smacking against your ass as he turns animalistic, his strength returning in full as his grip becomes tighter. The sudden change of sensation takes you by surprise, and he easily flips you over, getting on top of you, his left hand immediately clasping with yours beside your head. “Legs on me,” he groans softly as you obey his command.

He grips your thigh, hoisting it up high on his waist, his tip reaching the deepest part inside you. His thrusts are deep and precise as his thick tip drags against your gummy walls, stroking every last ridge and crevice, bringing you the utmost pleasure. “Uhh heeseung,” A shocked whimper escapes your swollen lips, your free hand clutching to his wide back, and your sounds make him absolutely feral. You swear you see stars as he pounds into you so fast and deep.

“I love you,” he breathed out while scanning your flushed face, his hand slipping between your bodies to finger your clit so you can both cum together this time. “I love you, y/n,” you moan at his confession as you stare into his eyes, your body slipping further up the bed while he gives it to you, and at the moment, you know you can’t resist uttering the words. “Say it back, please,” he whimpers out, his strokes becoming inconsistent the closer he gets. “Please,” he begs in a desperate voice, needing you to say the words back to him to confirm you feel the same way as he does.

“Love you too, hee so much.” You cup his cheek, his brows furrowed, and his eyes fill with tears as he buries his face in your neck, whimpering nonstop about how much you mean to him and how much he loves you. “I love you, I love you so much,” you confess in your moment of weakness, and you let go cumming around his cock your walls desperately clenching on him, begging to be filled up.

“I love you,” he confesses one last time before he cums. He squeezes your hand, groaning as he fills you with all of his love, his hips never wavering as he fucks not one but two loads of warm cum inside you, plugging up your pulsating hole with his thick base to ensure that nothing spills out.

He peppers your neck in kisses, moaning as you dig your nails into his back while the remainder of your high starts to fade away.

Heavy, exhausted breaths fill up the now silent but steamy bedroom, and you both lay there enjoying the last few faint pulses between your bodies before you even think about moving.

He props himself up on his elbow, staring down at your beautiful blissed-out face as he strokes your cheek with his thumb.

You look back and forth between his eyes, guilt slowly but surely filling your system. “Pull out”

“Why?” He whispered, confusion evident on his face. Without answering his question, you place your hands on his chest, gently pushing him back, and he doesn’t want to go against your will, so he very reluctantly pulls out of you, his cum streaming out of your hole like a river.

You quickly cover up with the sheets, hiding from him something you’ve never done after being intimate with him, which makes him even more confused.

Before he could even offer to clean you up, you were basically kicking him out. “Go”

“What do you mean go?” He asked.

“Just go, heeseung. This was a mistake, and we both know it.” his heart shatters at your words because how could this be happening? Just a minute ago, you were giving yourself to him, begging for him to make you his again, and the next, you’re just willing to kick him out and call making love to him a mistake?

“A mistake? So you regret it?” You could hear the hurt in his voice, and it made you feel even more guilty. “I don’t understand, y/n” his voice shakes slightly, and you know this was a bad idea from the fucking start. How could you let yourself get swept up by him again? He was supposed to be your ex, but here you are fucking him like you’re still both together, giving him mixed signals because even though your heart wanted him, your brain was telling you that he was no good for you.

“Heeseung, don’t,” you say, holding back your own tears. “You know this was never gonna work, and you kept coming back until I finally broke down and slept with you, but this does not mean we’re back together. When we broke up, I told you I’d never be getting back together with you.”

He gulps down the lump in his throat, staring at nothing in particular after taking his eyes off you.

He covers himself with his hands, the feeling of nakedness making its presence known. He stands up from the bed, wearing his underwear properly and buttoning up his shirt.

It’s silent except for the sounds of him rummaging through your room to find his pants. He puts them on, zipping them up, and he takes two steps to walk out of the bedroom before standing still. “So you said you love me. Was that a mistake, too?” You nod your head slowly, avoiding all eye contact with him, and he lets out a few chuckles before it turns into full-blown laughter.

You looked up at him, confused as to what he thought was so funny about this heartbreaking situation.

“I get it now.” his laugh settles, and he can’t believe he was stupid enough to even think this would work.

“Get what?” You questioned.

“I know what it is.” You look at him, puzzled, and wait for him to continue. “You’re nothing but a fucking slut” he says, and you whip your head in his direction, looking at him with pure shock. “Don’t look so surprised. It’s quite obvious you’re getting it from someone else.” he chuckles pathetically at himself. “You don’t need me no more 'cause you have been running around to all these parties and hooking up with random guys every night, right? You let them fuck you however they want, and you love it too, huh? Getting your slutty hole filled with a new guy every night?”

“Heeseung that’s not true and we both know it” you grit through your teeth trying not to show your emotions you can’t believe that’s really what he thought of you.

“Save it!” He shouts. “Tell me, do they do it better than I do? Is that why you left me in the first place? Cause I wasn’t doing it for you anymore, huh? Was I not big enough for you? what was it?” He interrogates.

“Heeseung, stop!” You shout back on the verge of tears.

“Why y/n? We both know you cheated cause I was never enough for you, but did you really have to do that to me? You know I still love you.” his voice cracks, and it breaks your heart when you hear his soft sniffles. You hated hearing him cry. It was the absolute worst. “Fuck I hate this so much,” he whispers to himself and swipes a hand over his face drying his tears. “But fuck it, I’ll just face it. I’ll never be enough for you. I’m pathetic. I haven’t even been with anyone since we broke up 'cause I’m still caught up on you, but you’re living the life you gave up on me a long time ago.”

You wish he’d stop doing this to himself. This is one of the many reasons why you had to break up with him in the first place. He never saw his worth and never thought you could see it, either. He never saw just how lovable he was and how easy it was to be yourself around him.

You never understood what made him so insecure in your guy's relationships. You never once thought about cheating when you were with him. You’d always go out of your way to make him feel loved, but it was just never enough.

Or maybe it was your fault. Maybe you gave him signs that you’d cheat, maybe you gave him signs that you didn’t love him.

But at this point, everything ruined your friendship, your trust, your relationship, your love.

But you tried cause even though everything was a mess, you still loved him, and though you couldn’t tell him that, you at least wanted to try and make him feel better about himself. “Heeseung, you are enough.”

“Yeah, right,” he scoffs.

“Heeseung, I know we’re over, but you deserve love, and I’m sorry I can’t give it to you,” you tell him, all while feeling completely helpless in this situation.

“Is that what you tell every guy you let inside you?” The room falls silent yet again, and you feel so weak and broken that you can’t even say anything back. If that’s what he wanted to believe about you, then fine, everything was over between you and him anyway.

He shook his head at you and walked out, slamming the door behind him, and you finally let the first of many tears fall.

As hurtful as it was, you’re glad that conversation happened, and now you just hope that he’ll leave you alone once and for all.

You just couldn’t handle him anymore because he was toxic.

[meo-on-prairie]

Deserve Better

Prompt: After a shitty breakup, involving a douchebag of an ex, who makes you realize he never loved you to begin with. You went to your best friends for comfort, but instead of telling you “you deserve better”, they show you the best you deserve. 

Word count: 1786

Tags: FLUFF, a tablespoon of Angst, hurt and comfort, Gojo and Getou being sweetest boys, satosugu established, satorugu x reader not yet, mention of: manipulation and love bombing.

Rambling: This is an extremely self-indulgence fic, heavily inspired by my shitty ex lmao. I just wanna be sandwich between Gojo and Getou to comfort my angry heart :((. This is a mini series, I wanna able to make this series to be compose of a bunch of stand-alone fics that merge together. This is my first time writing after a long while so… 

//////

“He was a pathetic liar!” you shout as soon as Suguru opens the door. Tears are streaming down your faces and you can’t seem to make them stop. The sight of your face full of anger and sorrow quite nearly broke Suguru’s heart. Oh, how he wished he could erase your pain. Not make your pain go away, no, he wanted to erase it from your life completely.

Satoru walks toward the door after hearing the loud commotion, “what did he do this time?” he said knowing exactly who was responsible for your tears. With all honesty, Satoru is only asking for your sake, if he could have it his way, violence is always the answer.

Satoru and Suguru are used to this, it’s been 2 years of this clockwork. Ever Since you start dating your pathetic boyfriend, Anthon, it been a cycle of you venting to them about your relationship problem, them telling you to break up with the fucker, and you “work it out” with the douchebag, who can only tell lies and empty promises, the next day and all is good for about 1 month. It’s the same cycle of them clearly seeing that you are being manipulated, yet unable to do anything. But then again, what can they do? They’re only your friends, nothing more even if they want to be more, and as friends, the only thing they can do is be there for you.

Anthon was your first love, your glasses were not tinted, it was dyed rose-pink. You loved him with everything you got, always there to support him mentally, emotionally, and even sometimes financially. In return, he would love-bomb you with constant, nonstop, overly cheesy affectionate words. He also made a lot of promises to you: of marriage, of spoiling you, of being a better man for you, of being faithful to you; all of which are empty and meaningless in hindsight. They’re so meaningless in fact that it led you to break-up with him 2 weeks ago.

You were tired of his empty words, so you laid down your boundary, you told him you would never want to marry someone who refuses to find a job to support themselves. His answer? “Why can’t you be nicer about these things? Your words cut deep”. Anthon was a man of nothing, he had nothing but his words, and even then he couldn't even keep them. But you loved him, so you put it all aside, all his actions, all his shortcomings, his unwillingness to change for himself; you put it all aside and waited with baited breath, surely, surely…. Surely he’ll do as he said. He never did. 

“Come in first, the night is cold, I don’t want you to get sick” Suguru ushers you through the door and into their apartment. As Suguru guided you toward their living room, Satoru went into the kitchen to grab some tissues, water, and something for you to eat your feelings away. 

As soon as your body touched the soft velvet material of their couch, you crumbled into Suguru’s arms. He pulls you in closer to his body as yours shakes and heaves, you two sit like that for what feels like an eternity as you let the tears that carry your pain and sorrows fall from your eyes. Your hands balls up Suguru’s shirt as you cry in his embrace, you try to control your sob but it only makes your body shakes harder, almost hyperventilating.

“Shhhh, take your time, let it out. I’m here… we’re here… we’re not goin’ anywhere”

“He said he loves me! He said he wanted to marry me! And not even 2 weeks after our breakup, he’s getting his dick wet and telling another girl he loves her!” you choked out in anguish, still in denial that any of this is real.

“How did you find out about that?” Satoru asked, carrying a tray full of food; after hearing your sobs, he decided that a few snacks wasn’t going to cut it. 

“Because the fucker doesn’t even have the decency to keep it private, he been posting her all over his social media!” you swipe out your phone in frustration, pulling up Anthon’s account to show your two best friends the picture of your ex and the girl sitting on his lap, kissing. 

They both make a face when you show them the picture, “gross” they said in unison as Satoru places the tray on the table and sits down on your other side.

“I’m just so angry, I can’t believe I wasted 2 years loving someone who never was truthful to me! How can I be so stupid?” your tears are boiling hot, they feel like acid on your skin.

“Hey, hey, look at me, you’re not stupid for simply loving someone.” Satoru cups your face with his hands, nudging you to face him, his thumbs gently wiping away your tears. You close your eyes and feel the warmth of his hands. It’s comforting to be held so gently.

“That’s right, don’t shame yourself for being strong enough to love someone with all you got. That’s a strength, not a weakness.” Suguru agrees, pulling a couple of tissues from the box and handing it to you. 

You take the tissues from him to wipe away the tears and blow your nose, it was getting a little hard to breathe from crying, “Thank you… It just hurt realizing that even though I loved him, he never loved me; at least, I don’t think someone who loves me would go out of their way to hurt me like this. Him posting her and rubbing it in my face not even 2 weeks later makes me feel like… I just wasn't worth loving…”

“You’re right, someone that loves you wouldn’t hurt you like he did. But that doesn’t mean you’re unlovable. To us, you’re worth all the love this world has to offer…” Suguru whispers, placing his hand on your shoulder, and he means it. God, does he mean it. Satoru can see it in his partner’s eyes, the same feelings he has.

Satoru and Suguru have loved each other deeply since they were kids, but they always feel something is missing in their relationship. When you walt into their life when they were 15 through the door call “physic group project”, they thought something was wrong with them. They still very clearly love each other, their love is still burning, but their hearts forget how to beat when you smile at them.

How can they not fall for you? You’re kind, so kind you would push aside your shyness and discomfort to help those that need it. You’re intelligent, you quite literally carried them through that physics group project. And dear god, the way you just fit perfectly into their dynamic makes them realize very quickly that they desperately want you to be a part of their life. So desperately, they couldn’t bring themselves to tell you about their feelings in fear of scaring you away from them forever.

“Tell you what? Let’s watch some true crime documentary that you like so much since you’re secretly a sociopath, maybe they’ll give you the inspiration of what to do for revenge?” Satoru said with a smirk.

“If inspiration striked you, we’ll be your executioners.” Suguru added, smiling in relief seeing that you're feeling better after letting it all out. You let out a small giggle and nod. 

Satoru turns on the TV and searches for “Unsolved” while Suguru goes to grab the three of you a blanket. When Suguru comes back with the blanket, you get comfortable cuddling between the two of them on the couch. Between Satoru’s jokes about how if he was the detective case wouldn’t have gone cold, and Suguru’s soft chuckles of ‘sure babe’ at his boyfriend’s comment,you start to feel a lot better. 

You have always felt the most at home with them. It felt natural to be with them, Satoru’s humor brings laughter into your day, Suguru’s gentleness makes you feel safe. They ground you. You’re starting to wonder why you were even with the dirtbag when you have best friends who show you how you should be treated. But before you can think more on that, drowsiness takes over you.

It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep. With how hard you were crying and the emotional turmoil you experienced, it would be more surprising if you stayed awake. Satoru looks over to the sight of your sleeping face. He squeezed Suguru’s hand he been holding behind you on the headrest of the couch.

Suguru looks over at Satoru and notices where his gaze was directed at. “I don’t want to see her like that again. She deserves all the sunshines life has got to offer, not heartbreak” Satoru whispered softly. 

“Do… you think⸻” Suguru started

“Yeah.” 

It’s a silent agreement between them. They’re done with watching you on the sideline. They’re done with seeing you in pain. They don’t want to be afraid of losing you anymore if it means they have to leave your happiness in the hands of some other dudes that’s not them. In the hands of someone that doesn’t know how to cherish it like they do. 

Suguru gives Satoru’s hand 3 long squeezes, I love you. A soft and silent affection flows between them. You always joke that they’re each other's twin flames due to how they seem to be sharing the same soul; their ideology, way of thinking, even how they feel. They’re so similar despite different personalities it’s uncanny. But they think that if they’re each other’s twin flame, then you would be their soulmate. 

They let go of each other's hands so Satoru can carry you into their guest’s room. Well, they call it that but the color and decorations they have in it are all catered to your liking, plus no one beside you ever stays the night anyway. 

Suguru opens the door to the room for Satoru. They laid you down and tucked you in. 

Suguru went into the bathroom to get a damp face towel. He softly wipes away your streaks of tears so you can sleep comfortably without feeling the stickiness from your tears. 

They closed the door as quietly as possible so they don’t wake you, not before glancing at you one last time. 

Looking at each other, eyes full of love and determination, they silently vow to each other. They’re going to make you fall, sweep you right off your feet. They’ll treat you like you’re their most prized treasure. You’ll fall for them so hard, you’ll forget you’ve ever loved anyone but them.

[r3starttt]

Abby x sick r!

Your eyes were so puffy already it was painful to keep them open. This was probably the third night this week you were unable to sleep due all the coughing and fever and just the general annoyance that comes physically and mentally due the flu.

And if being sick wasn’t enough, being sleep deprived had been causing you some nightmares whenever you tried to sleep. You’d only got some rest in those small moments before actually falling asleep, when you’re not too conscious yet not sleeping either, and even though those five minutes felt so good it wasn’t enough.

You were just so exhausted and frustrated, not being able to do anything but stay in bed all day. Too weak to even shower, you felt so disgusted about yourself and so ashamed for letting Abby see you like this. She insisted you looked hot still, her pretty girl, but you didn’t feel like that at all.

And you loved her and loved that she loved you so much too, but couldn’t help but feel like shit for being such a burden, for not being able to help her as you usually did. Whether you stood at home or you went out with her you always did something to keep things calm for both, to make your life’s easier. And now you couldn’t and besides that you looked horrible and felt horrible and you needed her like never but didn’t feel like asking her for anything, she was working so har lately, to attend you and help you recover. You couldn’t ask for more.

Until today. Your throat just felt so sore, your eyes felt like you’ve been crying since forever due the little sleep you’ve got and the sickness itself. And your nose and lips were burning from how much you’ve been blowing your nose lately. You needed her, to find some comfort, to see if maybe she’d got you to sleep as she usually did, just anything she could provide you, it would help and you were desperate for some of it.

“Abs… babe” your small pats on her shoulder woke her up, trying her best to open her eyes and see whatever was wrong “what happened?” the sleepiness of her voice made you smile almost immediately, waking a small regret on you for not waking her up the other days you struggled to sleep. You knew she wouldn’t mind it, but it didn’t feel right.

“can’t sleep… and everything hurts” just as you spoke you could feel the knot of tears forming on your throat. It was all the exhaustion and frustration finally coming out. And Abby knew, she noticed just by hearing your voice that you needed her, and she also knew that you only needed her when you were containing yourself for too long. So she didn’t hesitate on waking up completely, rubbing her eyes and gently sitting in the bed, opening her arms so you could cuddle with her.

“Shhh shhh it’s okay… you’re alright now” her voice was a little bit husky, yet so comforting and smooth. you crawled to her arms, making yourself some space in between all the blankets “how long have you felt like this huh? you know I don’t mind taking care of you” you could feel her arms slowly embracing you, pulling you closer to her and leaving just the right amount of space in between your bodies so you could properly breath “I’m sorry” your tears started to stain Abby’s shirt, making her heart ache “don’t apologize baby… it’s alright yeah? just let it all out”

The tears finally coming out of your body, her pretty voice guiding you trough your sleep and the warmth of her body made you have a proper sleep finally. It took her long enough to get it but it worked, after some minutes you were already pressed on her, head buried deep on her chest and arms holding on her shirt gently. You couldn’t look more prettier.

And even though your sleepy expression could still scream how overwhelmed you’ve been feeling and your breathing was still unsteady, you were finally able to rest. Not as you wished but just enough to help you get better. And it was all because of her.

[windvexer]

dealing with a nonthreatening entity in your home, if you can't easily communicate with spirits

just how I'd do it, the flowchart I'd personally work with, UPG ahead, etc; take what you like and leave the rest behind.

Nonthreatening: An entity which hasn't harmed you or tried to harm you, or isn't an active threat to you or your household, even if they may have acted in unpleasant or disruptive ways.

Dealing with: Sorting out the situation so that you feel comfortable with what's going on.

This post is about resolving a spirit situation in your home that you're uncomfortable with. It's not a general guide on spirit work, and it's not a recommendation for how to treat all spirits in all situations.

Banishing should probably not be a first step when dealing with an unwanted/surprise/unexpected spirit, or learning that a spirit exists where you didn't expect to be one.

Ideally, for the diplomatic spirit worker who wants to be regarded well by the otherworlds, several other steps come first.

Decide what you'd ideally like to do

Ideally, do you want the spirit to leave completely?

Never interact with you or make its presence known?

Hang around as long as it doesn't bother room mates or pets?

Integrate into the household and be a spirit room mate?

Become a part of your spirit family?

Etc!

Not saying you'll get your wish but it's a good idea to sit down and figure yourself out before you go and start moderating the life of an entity.

Like if your actual feeling is, "I do not want this guy here and I won't be comfortable in my home unless he leaves," then don't set out on purpose to make the guy a spirit home and give him house rules. Skip to the endgame step of asking him to leave.

Check on wards and protections before you take action

Not trying to be an alarmist but every now and then a random guy ends up being a big jerk, and in that situation the preferable option is to have just checked up on what tools you have on hand.

If you can communicate with spirits

Talk it out 👍 you may have to make compromises, especially if you're working with Big Guys who have a say in things, but by and large I find that if you can make the spirit a nice little house in a place they like and some solid house rules, a lot of situations are going to be resolved real fast.

If things go tits up, banishing.

If you can't easily perceive/2-way communicate with spirits

When perception isn't easy/possible, take reasonable steps and wait to see what happens.

If the stuff that was bothering you is resolved, count that as a win 👍

If you're still encountering problems, take the next step; do this until you've exhausted all options, and then move to banishing.

When you take actions, clearly affirm your intentions and expectations. Do not invite open-ended conversations that you can't participate in.

🛑 "If this spirit house isn't suitable for you, please try to let me know. I'll see what I can do to change it."

✅ "I've made this spirit house for you. Please make use of it according to your desires, but move on to another property if it isn't to your liking."

Set or review house rules

This isn't a comprehensive guide, but all you've really got to do is write down a list of rules, ritually read it off, and then stick the list somewhere you won't lose it.

A lot of spirit problems can be resolved by establishing solid house rules

A lot of panic about powerful spirits and faulty wards can be resolved by fixing accidental loopholes

Get your rules lawyer friend to help troubleshoot

E.g., "uninvited spirits aren't welcome here." Is a spirit still uninvited if you carry it in while it's inside of an object? It can get a bit tedious but it's a miracle spirits can understand human language at all, much less the miles between what you actually desire to occur versus what gets codified.

If a new spirit arrives or behavior occurs that you think is against your house rules, review your rules to see if there could be a loophole. Then, 'set' them again by re-reading them in a ritual setting. During that time, specifically ask the spirit to stop its bothersome behavior.

Divination or consulting with other practitioner friends can really help troubleshoot house rules.

Popular house rules include things like:

Don't mess with my dreams or sleep

Don't scare or make yourself known to house members or pets

Never go into my bedroom

Don't interfere with my spells or ritual workings, even if you're trying to help or protect me

Wait for a little while and see if that resolves things.

Make the guy his own little house

A spirit bothering someone isn't always them just being mischievous. Active spirits who roam around the house bored as hell can accidentally make themselves known. And ordering a bored guy to never do anything fun isn't necessarily a recipe for a happy household.

Make the guy a nice little area with some things to enjoy, especially little fidget toys and shiny stuff, and invite him to dwell in that area and make use of the enjoyable things.

This doesn't need to be in the shape of an actual miniature house.

Crochet basket, thermos with the lid popped open, desk organizer, pile of little cloths, small box with or without a lid, old jar, plastic tub, books stacked to make a nice private corner, etc.

Include a soft bed, which can take the form of comfortable cloths or a nice little pillow you crochet, etc.

Include things the spirit might like or use, such as coins, a fidget spinner, a mini rubix cube, a sun catcher, etc.

Spice it up by decorating it all nicely and including pretty things, like a nice printed silk scarf, a paint job or facade on the container, or lovely objects placed nearby.

Focus on privacy - give the guy somewhere to go so he can relax and unwind, and not constantly be bothered by people.

Most vitally, ensure that the spirit house won't be disrupted. Don't place or design it so that children or unwitting partners might "tidy it up" or take it down and play with it.

You don't have to do a big ritual cleansing or consecration or whatever.

Invite the guy to dwell there. Enter magical headspace or initiate ritual communication in whatever method you prefer.

"My guy, I see you are a part of the household. I've made you this house to use if you want to. Either way, bothering my partner has got to stop. If I need to talk to you for anything, I'll come back to this location. Anything I leave right next to the house is for you."

If the guy is stuck to an object, take that object somewhere nice

Learning how to bind a spirit to an object is a valuable skill for a witch. Sometimes nature does the job for you and the spirit is bound to an object on arrival.

Move that bad boy to a nice location, possibly to a spirit house you build, or maybe outside, even at a faraway location (I've left a few spirit vessels up the mountain, myself).

Make sure to positively affirm that you are taking this action to help the spirit, and your goal is to put it in a nice location.

Sit down with the dude and tell him to knock that shit off regardless of house rules

Presumably we're at this point because the spirit is still around, you don't want to actually tell him to get out, but something is happening that isn't working for you.

Despite the sarcastic section header, it's actually probably wise for you to own up to your own role in the situation.

Most spirits aren't jerks or stupid. They may be trying their best to interpret your words and behaviors.

You may be being unintentionally confusing or contradictory.

You may be laying down rapidfire changes that's making the spirit nervous or confused.

Your own magic may be creating barriers or impossibilities in the spirit world that prevent them from doing what you're asking.

They may be reacting to unseen situations you're completely unaware of.

A little humility goes a long way in soothing the waters.

Go to the guy's spirit house, if he has one, or otherwise go to where he's known to dwell; or, go to your usual working area. Enter magical headspace or initiate ritual communication.

Say something like,

"Hey, I need these very specific things to change. I don't mind you staying here, but it's my responsibility to care for this household, and I can't have this happening. If you are unable to stop doing this, I must politely request that you leave this household and find a new place to dwell."

(Note: If you're trying to cultivate psychism and want to be a spirit worker and so on, this is a great juncture to actually invite communication in whatever form might come - even if that communication comes slowly over days or weeks. But if that's not your jam for the present situation, you don't have to.)

(Maybe a controversial take, but you have a responsibility to do your best to do right by the spirits. We all have our limits and you also have a duty to your household, but if the reality is "I can't perceive or get input from spirits," you're limited in what you can do. Acting fairly and taking reasonable, diplomatic steps can sometimes be the best you can do.)

Ask the guy to leave

Enter magical headspace or initiate ritual communication.

"I'm sorry, but this isn't working out. I hold no ill-will towards you, but you must now depart and find a new dwelling outside of this property and this home.

It might be a good idea to invite him into a little vessel and then take that somewhere nice, but far away.

You can cleanse and bless a river rock and invite the guy to move in there, and then go take that somewhere you think is nice, or even just near a new apartment complex where he could find other residences, etc. I often find the vibes when transporting a spirit vessel to be very strong and they can be very opinionated about where they want to be left.

If you transport a spirit vessel to a new location, consider bringing a small offering (like a pinch of tobacco, or some bottled water) and pouring them out near the vessel in dedication to the spirit.

Announce that you're parting ways in good faith, and if you should ever meet again, that it will be in peace.

If all that fails, banishing is next

[mxstly-melancholy]

can i request a william afton x reader where they watch a porno together, and then like try to re-create it??? (if that makes any sense)

Idk why that popped into my head lol i just thought it would happen on a night in with afton :)

-🌌

I changed this up a little bit 🌌 anon! I hope you don’t mind <3

William Afton X Afab Reader

Warnings: Porn, Thigh riding, breeding, lots of pet names, sub/dom undertones if you look hard enough.

(this is horrendous I’m sorry I wrote it at 6 am with no sleep)

You laid in bed bored out of your mind. William wasn’t going to be home anytime soon, you thought, so you decided to pull up some porn videos on your phone. You couldn’t help but do that every time you were home alone and bored. It was a good way to get your mind off the burdens of life.

You click on a video, it shows an older guy wearing a suit (how ironic) and a younger woman. He guides her to straddle his thigh, letting her ride it. He comments about how naughty and what a whore she is.

You felt tingles through your body, wishing so badly William would let you do this. The video kept playing and your panties got wetter and wetter as the time passed. This man has made her cum all over his thigh multiple times before pounding her, such a lucky woman.

Your thighs were pressed together as you sat in bed, you felt pretty dumb making yourself all hot and bothered because William shouldn’t be home for another hour.

That is what you thought, because as the girl in the video was cumming loudly, the bedroom door opened. You practically throw your phone across the bed, trying desperately to mute it.

“I’m home early, dear… I see you’ve kept yourself occupied.” William laughed at your embarrassed face, putting his tie down on the dresser.

After you successfully locked your phone you hid your face in your hands.

“Welcome home..” you mumble into your hands.

William giggles at you and sits down next to you on the bed, loosening his belt.

“What was it that had you so entranced that you didn’t hear me come home?” He asked.

You sigh, “I don’t think you’d find it that interesting. It’s just boring… vanilla.. stuff.” You kind of lie.

William turns to you, “Well, show me.” He holds his hand out waiting for you to hand your phone over.

You shook with nervousness, but complied.

William unlocked your phone and put the video on, skipping through parts here and there. You could see his erection grow in his pants by the minute.

After a few minutes that seemed to last forever, he hands your phone back and looks at you with a mischievous smile.

You put your phone on the nightstand and as you turned around he was in your face, kissing you passionately. Shocked, but not complaining, you lean into him.

“Well, come on then.” He pats his thigh.

Your eyes widen with excitement, and quickly jump onto him. His hands came to your hips and started moving you immediately. You felt bad neglecting his obvious twitching cock in his pants, but before you could make out a word, your mouth fell open with a soft moan.

“That’s perfect… This is what I love to come home to. My perfect little slut just waiting to be used and ruined.” He whispers out. His words make your hips twitch and your pussy throb. Your panties were completely soaked and all you wanted to do was rip off your pajama shorts.

“So good for me.. my perfect girl.” He moves your hips faster against him, loud moans escaping your lips.

“Will..” you breathe out, holding onto his shirt collar tightly.

“Yes, darling?”

“Please… I’m… so close.”

And just like that, you were shoved off for a quick moment while he unzipped his pants, looking at the obvious wet stain you had left on his thigh. Before you could even protest against being removed from his thigh you were dragged onto him and he forced your shorts and panties to the side, sliding into you quickly. You yelp, and claw at him. “F-fuck!”

His feet were grounded into the bed and his knees bent, he began to ruthlessly pound into your dripping pussy.

The moans that escaped you both were loud, long and echoed throughout the bedroom.

“W-William! Oh fuck-“

“So fuckin’ pretty for me doll- Mhhf!”

You couldn’t help it, your orgasm took over you like fire spreading, you shook and cried on him as he continued to use your hole.

“Already? Come on baby keep up!” William teases you, watching your twisted expressions as you become overstimulated. One of his hands comes up and grabs your neck gently, making you look at him.

“Is this what you wanted, hm?” He asks.

You could barely get yourself to make out words, you nod and tears fall.

“My beautiful girl… I’m gonna cum so deep in you, you want that hm?” He rambles on as his thrusts get sloppy, his orgasm nearing.

You basically go limp on him, just holding yourself up enoguh so he could continue to fuck you.

“G-god- damn-“ he grunts out as he pushes as deep as he can, cumming deep inside of you. You can feel his hot cum pouring inside of you and it causes you to shiver and moan with him.

You both fall breathlessly, holding onto each other. William giggles, “God, I needed that.”

[rafeandonlyrafe]

only a little jealous

words: 700

warnings: established relationship, girls flirting with your boyfriend, drinking

“no seriously, does she not know that we are together?” you ask your friend, watching a girl flaunt herself in front of rafe, who looks completely disinterested as he sips his beer. you’re not even sure if he realizes that she’s showing off for him as she’s dancing right in front of where she’s sat.

“she probably doesn’t care.” your friend replies, and her words ring true when the girl makes eye contact with you, smirking. 

“oh, hell no.” you say, leaving your friend by the table as you head over to rafe. you walk past the girl, making sure to knock into her as she sways her hips. you sit yourself down right on rafes lap, who gives you a big smile, the first one he’s had on his face since you left him to go chat with your girlfriends.

“hi beautiful.” rafe says, squeezing your bare thigh as you peck a kiss to his cheek, leaving a mark with your peach lip gloss.

“hi handsome.” you say in response, smirking as the girl walks away now that you’re back, taking up all of rafes attention, not that he even cared about her in the first place. “you okay, baby?” he asks, squeezing your hip. you nod, but you know the sour look on your face is still evident. 

“babyyy.” rafe warns. you roll your eyes and fall against his body, resting your head against his neck. “i just hate the way everyone flirts with you.”

rafe lets out a barking laugh, making you furrow your brows and pinch his side. “rafe!”

“no, it’s cute, it’s so cute.” rafe laughs, arms squeezing you tightly against him. “you’re so jealous.”

“i’m a little jealous.” you correct him. “and it’s only because girls trip over themselves for you.” “if you’re only a little jealous why’d you come over here as soon as a girl got within five feet?” 

“i just missed you. i’m going back to my friends right now.” you say defiantly, too stubborn to admit that it really bothered you.

“okay…” rafe looks expectantly at you, and you eventually get up. you leave him with a kiss on his lips as you head back to your girlfriends, always meeting his eyes and seeing the smirk on his lips when you glance over at him.

you let out a sigh of relief with topper comes to sit next to rafe. you hope that no girls would interrupt their conversation so you decide it’s finally time to dance. it’s toppers party, and he assured rafe that there wouldn’t be too many guys, that way he could feel secure with letting you go off on your own.

a favorite song of your friend group comes on and you all squeal, heading to the dance floor to twirl around and sing. you dance for a couple more songs until your feet start to hurt in your heels and you need a drink. you leave your friends, promising you’ll be back soon.

you head to the makeshift bar, grabbing a white claw before heading to find rafe. you see him still sitting in the same chair, but instead of topper occupying the sofa next to him, it’s two girls. one is dressed in an incredibly low cut top, you’re honestly surprised that her boobs aren’t completely exposed. 

rafe isn’t even looking towards them, but you can see him replying with one word answers. your blood boils, wishing that people would just leave your boyfriend alone, especially when he clearly wasn’t interested. it’s not like there girls were just looking for a conversation as they twirl their hair and bite their lips.

you walk over, realizing you know one of the girls from high school.

“oh, hey madison.” you say, faking the excitement in your voice. “i see you’ve met my boyfriend. so sweet of you girls to attempt to entertain him while i was dancing, but rafe seems awful bored, so i’ll take over from here.”

madison goes to reply, but you cut her off with a big smile plastered on your face. “buh-bye!” 

you sit down on rafes lap, not even watching them walk away as you place your hand on rafes jaw, guiding his lips against yours. slightly too buzzed to feel embarrassment, you let yourself get lost in the kiss.

“literally so jealous.” rafe mumbles against your lips, biting it gently before releasing it with a chuckle.

“oh if you wanna see jealous, i can go dance with topper.” you say, starting to get up, but rafe grabs your hips and pulls you back down onto his lap, “oh, i don’t think so.”

[baby-yongbok]

hiii since you were asking for suggestions, may i request bf!chan being pissed by bumping into their s/o chatting with their ex? i’ve been thinking about this scenario for a while since i don’t know if he would play cool and then be mad for a whole week or would alfa the situation

Thank you for the ask, bestie! When I think of Chan seeing you talking to your ex my first thought is Jealous!Chan. I feel like he's a bit of a possessive person even if he doesn't really mean to be but he does it from a place of pure love and a bit of fear. I feel like he wouldn't know what to do with his emotions until some time has passed... You'll see what I mean lol anyway, Hear me out...

Jealousy, Jealousy

Word Count: 1099

Genre: Fluff with a sprinkle of angst? like just a tiny sprinkle

✨Masterlist✨

Chan wanted to surprise you. You had been having a rough time balancing work and classes lately so he wanted to do something special. He had it all planned out, he was going to get food from your favorite place and your favorite flowers to make you smile. He knew that if he went to a particular strip mall that he could pick everything up in one go and get home before you got back from studying. He crossed the busy street stepping onto the curb when he saw it. Honestly, he wished that he was hallucinating, he wished that maybe it was just a girl that looked a lot like you - too much like you. 

Unfortunately, his wish wouldn't come true today. You stood there with your backpack hanging on your shoulder as you casually chatted with your most recent ex. The two of you didn't end on bad terms but that didn't matter to Chan, he didn't like the way your ex looked at you and ghosted a touch to your shoulder every time you would say something the slightest bit amusing. Everyone knew that Chan was a bit possessive but what he felt in this moment was a bit more than that, there was a small pool of anger bubbling inside of him that he couldn’t seem to control. 

Before he knew it he was stalking towards you, shoulders back and chest slightly puffed out to assert his dominance. He reached the two of you before you even saw him coming, his hand possessively finding a home on your shoulder and pulling you back into him. He took you by surprise and from the look on your ex’s face he was quite taken aback too.

“Baby, I thought you were coming home after studying.” Chan says not completely looking at you. His gaze was semi fixed on your ex and the way his eyes scanned Chan’s frame, he hated every second that the two of you stood in front of him but what he hated even more is that you welcomed it.

“Oh, yeah I - uh just ran into an old friend. Chan this is -” You’re cut off by Chan’s voice, his tone assertive and uninterested.

“I know who this is.” He looked down at you with burning eyes and you knew exactly what that look meant, he was angry. “We should really get going, come on y/n” 

Without another word or glance from Chan he tightened his grip on your shoulder and guided you away from your ex not even giving you the chance to say goodbye. It’s not like you would anyway, you knew better than to get on Chan’s bad side and since you already seemed to be there you didn’t want to push it. 

“Chan what was -” He glared at you and you stopped mid sentence deciding not to try to talk to him just yet. This was a conversation to have at home and nothing in the world could explain how much you dreaded what was to come. 

“So we just talk to our exes now?” Chan asked as he closed the door behind you both. You hadn’t even gotten to take both of your shoes off yet and the dreaded conversation was already beginning. 

“Baby, we just ran into each other as I was leaving the cafe. He was literally telling me all about his new girlfriend and I was telling him about you, my lovely and very jealous boyfriend.” Chan’s face twisted at your statement. His arms crossed and his gaze was fixed on the hardwood floor for a second before he spoke up. 

“I am not jealous, y/n” He stalked past you and took a seat on the couch avoiding eye contact with you. “I’m angry, I’m not jealous.” 

You followed him, taking a seat in the free space next to him. “What exactly are you angry about?” You ask with furrowed brows. You lay a hand on his shoulder and smooth reassuring circles into it.

“I’m angry that you were speaking to him! I’m angry that he looked at you, that he smiled at you. I’m angry that you were standing there with him instead of being home with me… I’m.. I’m just..” Chan’s voice got smaller and smaller as he processed the words that were coming out of his mouth. A small sympathetic smile ghosted your lips as you allowed him time to process his emotions.

“Fuck.” He whispered sharply before laying his head back against the couch. “ I am jealous… aren’t I?”

“Yeah, baby, I think that you are.” You lay your head on his shoulder and his hand finds its way to your thigh giving it a tight squeeze that you know is meant to be apologetic. You appreciate it as the two of you sit in silence for a minute or two. 

“I’m sorry…I’m not usually the jealous type I just… when I saw you talking to him it felt like all of my defenses went up and I just couldn’t stand the thought of him trying to get you back. My imagination went wild and I just didn’t want to lose you.” You shifted a bit, placing yourself in his lap and snaking your arms around his neck as he lifted his head to look at you. His lids were low and you could sense a bit of shame in his voice. 

“I understand, Channie. I probably would’ve gotten a bit jealous if you were talking to your ex too, but that’s okay cause you know what that means?” He looked up at you with furrowed brows and shook his head. “That means that you love me and I love you too, more than you will ever know. People get jealous sometimes, it’s natural, we just have to make sure that it doesn’t consume us and we have to trust that our other half won’t hurt us.” 

Chan shakes his head, taking in your words and processing them slowly. “ You’re right, y/n… I’m sorry for all of that. I trust you with all of my heart and I promise I’ll get better with that.”

“I forgive you, Channie, everything is fine.” You lean down, resting your head in the crook of his neck as the two of you hug and share some deep breaths. 

“But like, next time I’d rather you walk right past him. Kinda like he’s invisible ya know?”

“Don’t ruin the moment, Chan. We were getting somewhere.” You smile against his neck and he lets out a faint chuckle. 

“Okay okay, I’m just kidding… kinda.”

[housewilson]

A MASTERLIST OF ALL THE BOOKS I COULD FIND IN TIM'S BOOKSHELVES

As someone who basically sees Tim Laughlin as my own version of Jesus Christ (I kind of wish I was lying but I have a 'beyond measure' tattoo branding my skin so perhaps I'm entirely serious), I simply needed to know what was on those shelves of his. And this was a hard task to achieve, believe me... but I got much farther than I initially thought I would.

(I've got so much to say about all of these books and how they might string together to create a deeper understanding of Tim as a character but I won't go into it here... maybe in a future post or video essay, who knows).

If you wish to help a girl out and attempt to figure out any of the other books I simply can not crack no matter how I look at the screenshots and mess with the adjustments... here's a folder full of 2k sized screenshots of those shelves.

Before I list the books one by one, I want to make a couple observations:

1) Almost all of the books I was able to pinpoint are non-fiction. The ones that aren't are children's books.

2) Topically, we see an interdisciplinary interest in:

History: from a book on a king in 4BC, to a survey of landholding in England in the 11th century.

Somewhat current historical events: books on World War I and II.

Western Philosophers: specially from the 16th to the 18th century.

Aesthetics: there's at least 2 books on the subject matter, but I couldn't find the second one, sadly.

Spirituality: not only christian/catholic; some of these books touch on Eastern practices such as Buddhism and Hinduism.

Fairy tales / children's books.

Psychology: specially in regards to mysticism and sexuality.

Science and scientific discovery/research.

3) A lot of the history, current events, and spirituality books are autobiographies/memoirs.

4) A lot of books (specially those on sciences and philosophy) tend to be more so anthologies or overviews on a subject matter rather than a book written by one specific author on one very concrete topic.

Overall, this all reflects very well an idea Jonathan Bailey himself expressed in a brilliant interview you can watch here if you haven't yet:

"Tim has buddhist flags in his 1980s flat in San Francisco, he has crystals, he is someone who is always seeking other ways to understand human experience. Which is probably tiring for him. Throughout the decades, he sort of appears as completely different people. At the crux of it there's this extreme grinding, contrasting, aggressive duality between feeling lovable and not feeling lovable. There's such shame in Tim. But it's the push and the pull which keeps him alive.”

This desire to understand human psychology, spirituality, and the ways of the universe through as many diverse lenses as possible, as well as a predilection for non-fiction, expresses very much to me that insatiable thirst for truth that defines his character so strongly.

OKAY, THAT BEING SAID. Here's the list in chronological order of publication.

PS. if you decided to click on any of the following titles it'd definitely not take you to a google drive link of the pdf file where you could download and read these books for yourself. Because that would be illegal and wrong.

Journeys through Bookland by Charles H. Sylvester (1901?) (1922 Edition)

I don't know which specific volume he owns, sorry, I tried my best but the number is not discernible (hell, the title barely is). If anyone wants the download link to these hmu because I'm not about to individually download all 10 right now.

10 volumes of poems, myths, Bible stories, fairy tales, and excerpts from children's novels, as well as a guide to the series. It has been lauded as ‘a new and original plan for reading, applied to the world’s best literature for children.’

Pilgrimage by Graham Seton Hutchison (1936)

This book provides a view of the battlefields of WW I through the eyes of the average fighting man. 

One curious thing about this book is that it's author, a British First World War army officer and military theorist, went on to become a fascist activist later in his life. Straight from Wikipedia:

"Seton Hutchison became a celebrated figure in military circles for his tactical innovations during the First World War but would later become associated with a series of fringe fascist movements which failed to capture much support even by the standards of the far right in Britain in the interbellum period." He made a contribution to First World War fiction with his espionage novel, The W Plan."

The Seven Storey Mountain by Thomas Merton (1948) 

The Seven Storey Mountain tells of the growing restlessness of a brilliant and passionate young man, who at the age of twenty-six, takes vows in one of the most demanding Catholic orders—the Trappist monks. At the Abbey of Gethsemani, "the four walls of my new freedom," Thomas Merton struggles to withdraw from the world, but only after he has fully immersed himself in it. At the abbey, he wrote this extraordinary testament, a unique spiritual autobiography that has been recognized as one of the most influential religious works of our time. Translated into more than twenty languages, it has touched millions of lives.

This book requires no introduction. It's the one he keeps the Fire Island's postcard in and the one we see him re-reading in episode 8 after Hawk brings it to the hospital with him at the end of episode 7.

Just a little detail I noticed:

Apparently he liked the book so much he visited Gethsemani, which was the home of its author all the way up till 1968.

For all we know, he might have even met its author!

Sexual Behavior in the Human Male by Alfred Charles Kinsey, Wardell B. Pomeroy (1948)

When published in 1948 this volume encountered a storm of condemnation and acclaim. It is, however, a milestone on the path toward a scientific approach to the understanding of human sexual behavior. Dr. Alfred C. Kinsey and his fellow researchers sought to accumulate an objective body of facts regarding sex. They employed first hand interviews to gather this data. This volume is based upon histories of approximately 5,300 males which were collected during a fifteen year period. This text describes the methodology, sampling, coding, interviewing, statistical analyses, and then examines factors and sources of sexual outlet.

Yes, Charles Kinsey is indeed behind the Kinsey scale that has done so much for the LGBTQ+ community.

Their Finest Hour (1949), The Grand Alliance (1950), and Closing the Ring (1951) by Winston Churchill

Winston Churchill's six-volume history of the cataclysm that swept the world remains the definitive history of the Second World War. Lucid, dramatic, remarkable both for its breadth and sweep and for its sense of personal involvement, it is universally acknowledged as a magnificent reconstruction and is an enduring, compelling work that led to his being awarded the Nobel Prize for literature in 1953. 

The European Philosophers from Descartes to Nietzsche by Monroe C. Beardsley (1960)

In so far as we reflect upon ourselves and our world, and what we are doing in it, says the editor of this anthology, we are all philosophers. And therefore we are very much concerned with what the twelve men represented in this book--the major philosophers on the Continent of Europe--have to say to us, to help us build our own philosophy, to think things out in our own way. For the issues that we face today are partly determined by the work of thinkers of earlier generations, and no other time is more important to the development of Western thought than is the 250-year period covered by this anthology. Monroe. C. Beardsley, Professor of Philosophy at Swarthmore College, has chosen major works, or large selections from them, by each man, with supplementary passages to amplify or clarify important points. These include: Descartes - Discourse on Method (Descartes), Thoughts (Pascal), The Nature of Evil (Spinoza), The Relation Between Soul and Body (Leibniz), The Social Construct (Rousseau), Critique of Pure Reason (Kant), The Vocation of Man (Fichte), Introducciton to the Philosophy of History (Hegel), The World as Will and Idea (Schopenhauer), A General View of Positivism (Comte), The Analysis of Sensations and the Relation of the Physical to the Psychical (Mach), Beyond Good and Evil (Nietzsche).

The New Intelligent Man's Guide to Science by Isaac Asimov (1965)

Asimov tells the stories behind the science: the men and women who made the important discoveries and how they did it. Ranging from Galilei, Achimedes, Newton and Einstein, he takes the most complex concepts and explains it in such a way that a first-time reader on the subject feels confident on his/her understanding. Assists today's readers in keeping abreast of all recent discoveries and advances in physics, the biological sciences, astronomy, computer technology, artificial intelligence, robotics, and other sciences.

The Heavenly City of the 18th Philosophers by Carl L. Becker (1932) (1962 reprint)

Here a distinguished American historian challenges the belief that the eighteenth century was essentially modern in its temper. In crystalline prose Carl Becker demonstrates that the period commonly described as the Age of Reason was, in fact, very far from that; that Voltaire, Hume, Diderot, and Locke were living in a medieval world, and that these philosophers “demolished the Heavenly City of St. Augustine only to rebuild it with more up-to-date materials.” In a new foreword, Johnson Kent Wright looks at the book’s continuing relevance within the context of current discussion about the Enlightenment.

I find the particular choice of adding this book very curious and on brand, since it explores the idea that philosophers of the Enlightenment very much resembled religious dogma/faith in their structure and purpose. Just... A+ of the props department to not just add any kind of book on philosophy anthology.

Herod The Great by Michael Grant (1971)

The Herod of popular tradition is the tyrannical King of Judaea who ordered the Massacre of the Innocents and died a terrible death in 4 BC as the judgment of God. But this biography paints a much more complex picture of this contemporary of Mark Antony, Cleopatra, and the Emperor Augustus. Herod devoted his life to the task of keeping the Jews prosperous and racially intact. To judge by the two disastrous Jewish rebellions that occurred within a hundred and fifty years of his death -- those the Jews called the First and Second Roman Wars -- he was not, in the long run, completely successful. For forty years Herod walked the most precarious of political tightropes. For he had to be enough of a Jew to retain control of his Jewish subjects, and enough of a pro-Roman to preserve the confidence of Rome, within whose territory his kingdom fell. For more than a quarter of a century he was one of the chief bulwarks of Augustus' empire in the east. He made Judaea a large and prosperous country. He founded cities and built public works on a scale never seen before: of these, recently excavated Masada is a spectacular example. And he did all this in spite of a continuous undercurrent of protest and underground resistance. The numerous illustrations presents portraits and coins, buildings and articles of everyday use, landscapes and fortresses, and subsequent generations' interpretations of the more famous events, actual and mythical, of Herod's career.

Readings in the Philosophy of Art and Aesthetics compiled by Milton Charles Nahm (1975)

A college level comprehensive anthology of essays written on the arts and the field of aesthetic philosophy.

The Mustard Seed: Discourses on the Sayings of Jesus Taken from the Gospel According to Thomas by Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh (1975)

This timely book explores the wisdom of the Gnostic Jesus, who challenges our preconceptions about the world and ourselves. Based on the Gospel of Thomas, the book recounts the missing years in Jesus’ life and his time in Egypt and India, learning from Egyptian secret societies, then Buddhist schools, then Hindu Vedanta. Each of Jesus' original sayings is the "seed" for a chapter of the book; each examines one aspect of life — birth, death, love, fear, anger, and more — counterpointed by Osho’s penetrating comments and responses to questions from his audience.

(You don't know how fulfilling it was to find some of these books and just sit there like "oh my god, yessss, he'd SO read that".)

A Third Testament by Malcolm Muggeridge (1976)

A modern pilgrim explores the spiritual wanderings of Augustine, Pascal, Blake, Kierkegaard, Dostoevsky, Tolstoy, and Bonhoeffer. A Third Testament brings to life seven men whose names are familiar enough, but whose iconoclastic spiritual wanderings make for unforgettable reading. Muggeridge's concise biographies are an accessible and manageable introduction to these spiritual giants who carried on the testament to the reality of God begun in the Old and New Testaments. - St. Augustine, a headstrong young hedonist and speechwriter who turned his back on money and prestige in order to serve Christ - Blaise Pascal, a brilliant mathematician who pursued scientific knowledge but warned people against thinking they could live without God - William Blake, a magnificent artist-poet who pled passionately for the life of the spirit and warned of the blight that materialism would usher in - Soren Kierkegaard, a renegade philosopher who spent most of his life at odds with the church, and insisted that every person must find his own way to God - Fyodor Dostoevsky, a debt-ridden writer and sometime prisoner who found, in the midst of squalor and political turmoil, the still small voice of God - Leo Tolstoy, a grand old novelist who swung between idealism and depression, loneliness and fame and a duel awareness of his sinfulness and God s grace - Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a pastor whose writings and agonized involvement in a plot to kill Hitler cost him his life, but continue to inspire millions

Portraits: The photography of Carl Van Vechten (1978)

Can't find a file but you can borrow it from archive.com in the link provided.

During his career as a photographer, Carl Van Vechten’s subjects, many of whom were his friends and social acquaintances, included dancers, actors, writers, artists, activists, singers, costumiers, photographers, social critics, educators, journalists, and aesthetes. [...] As a promoter of literary talent and a critic of dance, theater, and opera, Carl Van Vechten was as interested in the cultural margin as he was in the day’s most acclaimed and successful people. His diverse subjects give a sense of both Carl Van Vechten’s interests and his considerable role in defining the cultural landscape of the twentieth century; among his many sitters one finds the leading lights of the Harlem Renaissance, the premier actors and writers of the American stage, the world’s greatest opera stars and ballerinas, the most important and influential writers of the day, among many others.

Report of the Shroud of Turin by John H Heller (1983)

Heller, while a man of science, was nevertheless a devout man (Southern Baptist). He viewed his task concerning The Shroud with great scepticism; there have been far too many hoaxes in the world of religion. The book describes in great detail the events leading up to the team's conviction that the Shroud was genuine; last - not least - being Heller and Adler's verification of "heme" (blood) and the inexplicable "burned image" of the crucified man. Although carbon dating indicates that the image is not 2000 years old and that the cloth is from the Middle Ages, there is not enough evidence to disprove Heller's assertion that the Shroud is indeed genuine.

Context for those who may not know (though I doubt it's necessary): The shroud of Turin "is a length of linen cloth that bears a faint image of the front and back of a man. It has been venerated for centuries, especially by members of the Catholic Church, as the actual burial shroud used to wrap the body of Jesus of Nazareth after his crucifixion, and upon which Jesus's bodily image is miraculously imprinted."

It is a very controversial subject matter and I definitely don't know that from going to an Opus Dei school since the day I was born till the day I graduated high school.

Mysticism, Psychology and Oedipus by Israel Regardie (1985)

I've tried my hardest but despite many Israel Regardie books being on the world wide web, I can't find a copy of this specific one.

Mysticism, Psychology and Oedipus, from the Small Gems series is one of these mysterious alchemys which Regardie and Spiegelman crafted for the serious student of mysticism. Mysticism, Psychology and Oedipus by Dr. Israel Regardie and his friend, world renowned Jungian Psychologist, J. Marvin Spiegelman, Ph.D. was created to reach the serious student at the intersecting paths of magic, mysticism and psychology. While each area of study overlaps they also maintain their own individual paths of truth. One of Regardie’s greatest gifts was his rare ability to combine these difficult and diverse subjects and make them understandable.

Domesday Book Through Nine Centuries by Elizabeth M. Hallam (1986)

In 1086 a great survey of landholding in England was carried out on the orders of William the Conqueror, and its results were recorded in the two volumes, which, within less than a century, were to acquire the name of Domesday, or the Book of Judgment 'because its decisions, like those of the last Judgment, are unalterable'. This detailed survey of the kingdom, unprecedented at that time in its scope, gives us an extraordinarily vivid impression of the life of the eleventh century.

The following two are a fuck up on the props department part because they were published after 1987 but we'll forgive them because they were not expecting for me to do all this to figure out the titles of these books, I'm sure:

The One Who Set Out to Study Fear by Peter Redgrove (1989)

This book barely exists physically, rest assured it does not exist online... LOL.

The author of The Wise Wound presents here a re-telling of Grimm's famous fairy tales, written in a manner and spirit more suited to the present day. Each story is rooted in the original, but cast in an energetic style that is both disrespectful and humorous. 

Essential Papers on Masochism by Margaret Ann Fitzpatrick Hanly (1995)

The contested psychoanalytic concept of masochism has served to open up pathways into less-explored regions of the human mind and behavior. Here, rituals of pain and sexual abusiveness prevail, and sometimes gruesome details of unconscious fantasies are constructed out of psychological pain, desperate need, and sexually excited, self- destructive violence. In this significant addition to the "Essential Papers in Psychoanalysis" series, Margaret Ann Fitzpatrick Hanly presents an anthology of the most outstanding writings in the psychoanalytic study of masochism. In bringing these essays together, Dr. Fitzpatrick Hanly expertly combines classic and contemporary theories by the most respected scholars in the field to create a varied and integrated volume. This collection features papers by S. Nacht, R. Loewenstein, Victor Smirnoff, Sigmund Freud, Jacques Laplanche, Robert Bak, Leonard Shengold, K. Novick, J. Novick, S. Coen, Margaret Brenman, Esther Menaker, S. Lorand, M. Balint, Bernhard Berliner, Charles Brenner, Helene Deutsch, Annie Reich, Marie Bonaparte, Jessica Benjamin, S.L. Olinick, Arnold Modell, Betty Joseph, and Janine Chasseguet-Smirgel.

Let's not forget another book we know has been present in his shelves at some point:

Look Homeward, Angel by Thomas Wolfe (1929)

It is Wolfe's first novel, and is considered a highly autobiographical American coming-of-age story. The character of Eugene Gant is generally believed to be a depiction of Wolfe himself. The novel briefly recounts Eugene's father's early life, but primarily covers the span of time from Eugene's birth in 1900 to his definitive departure from home at the age of 19. The setting is a fictionalization of his home town of Asheville, North Carolina, called Altamont in the novel.

And Ron Nyswaner mentioned in a podcast (might be this one? I'm not sure) that he scrapped from the script a line where Tim recommends this poem at some point:

He specially emphasized the line "If equal affection cannot be, Let the more loving one be me".

And lastly, if anyone wanted to know:

His copy of the bible is the Revised Standard Version by Thomas Nelson from either 1952 or 1953.

Because why the hell not figure out what specific translation of the holy bible a fictional character was basing his beliefs on — as if the set designers cared nearly as much as I do.

[jareaul0ver]

Talk Too Much

Summary: You never learn when to shut your mouth, so JJ has to shut it for you.

wc: 1.7k warnings: smut (r recieving), fingering, oral, cursing, semi-public sex (in a bathroom where they could easily be caught) pairings: jennifer jareau x fem!reader

It was a boring day at the BAU. There weren't many days that the team wouldn't have any cases, but today happened to be one of them. You needed to find a way to entertain yourself, so you started bugging everyone.

You tried to talk to Spencer, but he was too distracted with the stack of books piled on his desk. Emily was chatting with Penelope about something "top secret". Dave was telling Derek about his famous pasta dishes, which you found incredibly boring, and you knew well enough to not bug Hotch.

That left JJ as your only option to bother, and that you did. You walked over to her office and smiled at her. "Hey, you."

She looked up from her desk filled with paperwork and softly smiled. "Hey, Y/N. You need something?"

You shrugged and walked into her office, sitting yourself down on the chair across the desk from her. "Not necessarily, no." She flashed you a slightly confused look. "Jayje, I'm bored. I'm going to go crazy if I don't talk to someone."

She sighed but her smile grew. "I've got paperwork to do, but if you want to talk, then talk." JJ immediately knew she'd end up regretting this decision, as once you got started, you didn't stop.

However, she loved the way your face lit up when those words left her mouth. You immediately opened your own and started rambling about complete nonsense.

For a while, JJ thought it was adorable. She loved seeing how excited you'd get when you'd remember a detail to add onto the end of one story, then remembering something from another, making you talk about that.

But eventually, that cuteness that she ever so adored faded. She found herself staring right at your lips, wishing she could just grab your face and press her lips against it. She was getting so lost in watching the way your lips moved while you talked, that she didn't even realize you had stopped.

"Jayje?" You questioned, waving your hand gently in front of her face.

Her eyes darted up to meet yours and she blinked a few times. "Hm?"

"Are you even listening anymore?" You teased her, even though you knew for a fact that she wasn't, and she probably was just zoning out to get through the conversation.

She hesitated for a moment before standing up. She walked around her desk and grabbed your arm. She dragged you up from the seat and out of her office. "JJ, what the hell-" She shot you a look, making you immediately shut up.

The two of you ended up in the bathroom. She gently guided you in before stepping in after you and locking the bathroom door behind her.

"Are you gonna say anything to me, or-"

Her hand flew up and covered your mouth. She breathed out. "God, Y/N, you talk way too fucking much." She moved her hand from your mouth, and it wrapped somewhat loosely around your neck.

Without hesitation her lips were pressed feverishly on yours. You were caught off guard, but once you regained your senses you immediately kissed her back.

Pure bliss spread throughout the both of your bodies, but JJ wanted more. Her body was heating up, and all she wanted in this moment was to take you entirely.

She gently squeezed your neck with her hand and a small gasp left your throat. She slipped her tongue into your mouth and groaned the second your tongues swished around each others. Her hand trailed down your body and landed on the side of your abdomen, her other hand mirroring the placement on the other side.

She squeezed your sides and pulled her lips away from yours. Before you could protest, her lips attached to your neck. You sucked in a sharp breath and leaned your head, giving her better access to your skin.

JJ was careful to not leave any marks on your skin, even though she so badly wanted to. Her hands flew up to the top button of your shirt, and she easily unbuttoned it. She pulled back from kissing your neck and looked you in the eyes, asking silently for permission to continue.

You nodded without hesitation and she immediately pressed her lips back against yours. Her fingers found the next button, and then the next, and the one after that. Soon enough your shirt was fully unbuttoned and hanging loosely on your body.

You shivered a bit at the chilly bathroom air brushing over your bare stomach. JJ placed her hands on your hips and squeezed them tightly, eliciting a whimper from your lips.

You quickly felt the heat growing warmer between your legs, and you didn't know how much longer you could go without breaking down and begging JJ to pleasure you.

As if she read your mind, she kissed down your collarbone, all while sliding her hands up your back and to the clasp of your bra. She unclipped it in a swift and easy motion, and peeled both your shirt, and bra off of you.

Your clothes fell to the floor and JJ wasted no time in bringing one hand to knead a breast, while taking the nipple of the other in her mouth. You clasped your hand over your mouth to ensure that no one but the two of you heard the whimpers that escaped your mouth.

You bucked your hips against her, trying to feel the friction you needed, but it wasn't working. You whined quietly. "JJ, please."

JJ pulled back and her hands dropped to the zipper of your pants. "Please, what?" She tilted her head as she undid your zipper painfully slow.

"Please, just fuck me. I promise I'll be a good girl and shut up." You pleaded her. You almost couldn't take her teasing anymore.

JJ chuckled lowly. "Oh, I was planning on it either way." She swiftly made work of your pants and they slipped down your legs and onto the floor. She placed her hands underneath your ass and lifted you up, placing you on the bathroom sink.

Your breath caught in your throat. All that was left as a barrier between the two of you was your panties. JJ placed her hands on your thighs and moved them up towards the waistband of your underwear.

She kept her eyes on yours as she hooked her fingers around it. You assisted her in pulling them off. She looked down at them before discarding your panties to the floor. When she looked back up at you, a small smirk was playing on her lips. "You're soaked, honey. All for me?"

Your lips parted and you nodded dazedly. You watched as JJ slowly got down onto her knees. She placed her hands on the insides of your thighs and spread them apart. She licked her lips at the sight of your dripping cunt.

"God." She breathed. "You're so fucking perfect." She kissed the insides of your thighs, and you instinctively tried to close them, but JJ's strong grip kept your legs wide apart. You bit your lip as she got closer to your heat.

She swiped her tongue through your folds and a moan escaped both of your lips. You covered your mouth with your hand. The last thing that you both needed right now was for someone to come knocking at the bathroom door.

JJ found herself utterly entranced by your taste. She didn't hesitate to latch her mouth onto your clit and start sucking. A string of quiet curses fell from your lips. She pulled back and looked at you from below. "You're gonna have to stay quiet for me, honey, can you do that?" You nodded but she shook her head. "Use your words." She demanded softly.

"I- I can stay quiet." You shakily breathed.

"Good girl." She mumbled before attaching her lips right back on your clit. She swirled her tongue around it, noting how you bucked your hips every time she sucked a little harder. She noticed every reaction your body had to her actions, and she relished in it.

She brought a hand up and without warning teased a finger into your entrance. She slowly pumped it while keeping her mouth stuck to your clit. You threw your head back and bit your lips so hard you were convinced you'd draw blood.

She slipped another finger in, and started curling them inside of you. The hand not covering your mouth flew to her hair and you gripped it tightly. JJ moaned against your core, sending shivers through your body.

She kept her movements going for a little longer and you felt yourself nearing release. You whined through your hand as your hips rolled forward against her face and on her fingers. "Jayje, I- I'm close." You said breathlessly.

She quickly inserted a third finger and quickened her pace. She sucked and prodded your clit. You were starting to get louder, so she pulled her mouth away. Before you could protest, she stood up and locked her lips onto yours.

You groaned into her mouth at the taste of yourself. She used her thumb to rub circles on your swollen bud. Your moans and noises were getting caught in JJ's mouth.

She pulled back just enough to whisper, "Come for me, Y/N." She pushed her lips back on yours feverishly, and with a few more pumps and curls of her fingers you came undone.

She slowly helped you come down from your high. Your forehead was pressed against hers and you could feel each other's breath of your faces. She gently pulled her fingers out of you, causing you to whine.

She brought her hand up in between your faces. "Open." She whispers, and you immediately comply. She places her fingers covered in your juices on your tongue and you hum in satisfaction.

She pulls her fingers out and leans in to press a delicate kiss against your lips. "Let's get you dressed, hon." You nod and slide off the sink. You let JJ help you get dressed again.

After you've both fixed your appearance you turn to her with a small smirk. "Maybe I should talk more often, if this is how it'll end up."

[hyperfixatedoncrimminalminds]

can you do an Aaron hotchner x teen!daughter reader where the reader is about 16 or so and she gets her period at school and has nothing and she’s anxious to call Aaron (this is a few years after Hayley’s death so reader has no mom) but being the great dad he is he helps her out and pampers her for the rest of the day.

Aaron Hotchner x Teen Daughter Reader

Request:

can you do an Aaron hotchner x teen!daughter reader where the reader is about 14 or so and she gets her period at school and has nothing and she’s anxious to call Aaron (this is a few years after Hayley’s death so reader has no mom) but being the great dad he is he helps her out and pampers her for the rest of the day.

Third person pov...

It was just like any other day at school for 14-year-old Y/N Hotchner. She sat in her math class, trying her best to pay attention to the lesson, but her mind kept wandering off.

She couldn't shake off the sudden discomfort she was feeling in her lower abdomen. It was a new feeling for her and she was starting to feel anxious.

Then she rememberd this morning, Y/N Hotchner woke up feeling shitty, the 14 year old jsut wanted to lay in bed all day and not move, but eventually her Dad forced her to go to school.

The teenager knew exactly what was going on - she was getting her period. She had been dreading this day for a while now, knowing that she would have to face it alone without her mother.

It had been a few years since her mother, Hayley, had passed away, and Y/N still missed her terribly. She wished her mother was here to guide her through this new experience.

As the class finally ended, Y/N made a quick escape to the bathroom, hoping to find some relief. She rummaged through her backpack, hoping to find a pad or tampon.

But to her horror, she realized she had nothing. No pads, no tampons, not even a spare piece of paper.

Panic set in as Y/N mind raced with thoughts of how she was going to make it through the rest of the day.

She couldn't focus on her classes, and she was afraid to ask a teacher or a friend for help. She felt completely alone and helpless.

She couldn't believe she had forgotten to pack them in her bag. She didn't know who to turn to. She couldn't call her father, Aaron, at work and she didn't have any close friends at school.

Feeling embarrassed and alone, Y/N decided to call her father anyway. She took a deep breath and dialed his number. As the phone rang, her heart raced, and she prayed that he would answer.

"Hey, N/N" Aaron's voice came through, the young girl forced herself not to cry as she spoke, she knew he could sense the concern in his tone.

"Dad, it's me" the H/C teen said, trying to keep her voice steady.

"Is everything okay?" Aaron asked, sensing the worry in his daughter's voice.

It was just a normal morning once his children left home he was at work, The team was busy working on their latest case and wrting uo whay happend

Aaron was absorbed in reviewing the evidence, when his phone suddenly rang. He glanced at the caller ID and saw that it was his daughter.

Who he had complete custody of after his wife her mother, Haley, had passed away a few years ago.

Aaron's heart skipped a beat, as he immediately answered the call, worried that something had happened to his daughter.

'Hey, sweetheart, is everything alright?' he asked, his voice filled with concern.

'Dad, I- I have a problem,' his daughter, who was now 14, said nervously.

Aaron's mind immediately went into overdrive, thinking of the worst possible scenarios. 'What is it? Are you hurt? Do I need to come pick you up?'

'I got my period at school, and I don't have anything with me. Can you please pick me up" his daughter explained, her voice shaking with embarrassment.

Aaron was momentarily taken aback by his daughter's confession. He had never expected to be having this conversation with her at such a young age, but he knew he had to be there for her.

"Okay swetie, dont worry im on my way, see you soon" He quickly reassured her and told her that he would be there to pick her up from school.

Aaron let out a sigh of relief, knowing that it was just a natural and normal part of growing up.

'Thank you, Dad,' his daughter said, the relief evident in her voice.

Aaron quickly wrapped things up at work and rushed to his daughter's school.

When he arrived at the school, his daughter was waiting for him at the entrance. She was relieved to see her father's familiar face, and she could feel the tension dissipating.

As soon as she saw him walking into the school, Y/N couldn't hold back her tears. She ran into his arms, feeling safe and loved. Aaron held her close, soothing her with his familiar embrace.

"Dad, I'm so sorry. I didn't know who else to turn to" Y/N apologized as they walked to the car.

"Don't apologize, sweetheart. I am always here for you, no matter what" Aaron said, placing a comforting arm around his daughter.

As they drove back home, Aaron could sense how uncomfortable Y/N was feeling.

He tried to lighten the mood by joking about awkward first period stories from his own teenage years, thought Y/N still felt awkward.

Once they got home Aaron handed his daughter a plastic bag filled with products for her, Thanking him she ran upstairs to change and finally be comfortable.

When she came back down she found her dad sitting in the sofa. "Thanks dad" she tells the man crawling into the sofa next to him.

Aaron smiles at his daughter and hugs her tightly. "It was no problem Sweetie ill always be there if you need me" he tells the teen making her smile.

The awkwardness of the situation finally over. Aaron made his daughter a cup of hot chocolate and let her relax in the living room. He could see how tired and drained she was from the day's events, and he wanted to make sure she felt pampered and taken care of.

He brought her a warm blanket and put on her favorite movie, letting her lay on the couch and rest. Throughout the day, he made sure to check on her and bring her anything she needed. He even surprised her with her favorite takeout for dinner, knowing that she probably didn't feel like cooking.

Despite the embarrassment and discomfort, Aaron's daughter felt grateful for her dad's presence and care. She knew that she could count on him no matter what, and that made all the difference in the world.

As she lay in bed that night, she smiled to herself, feeling lucky to have a dad who not only supported her but also knew exactly how to take care of her. From that day on, she knew that she could always count on him, no matter what life threw her way.

The end!

Hope you liked this oneshot! 4th one today wow I'm on a roll, sorry for any grammar and Spelling mistakes.

Request are open!

Word count: 1200

[fitgirlfemdom]

Small dick anon here. When I was 185lbs it measured 5 inches, but by the time I was 270 pounds it was only 4 inches with all the fat around it. I never used to have any complaints about my size but once I got bigger it changed. I would only occasionally slip out of someone before and was able to get a good amount of motion. By my biggest weight I had two sexual experiences. The first was with a longtime fwb who loved my dick I was around 260 and my partner likewise. With the extra weight it never stayed hard for as long, and I realized unless I was like totally hard I couldnt stay inside them at all. Theyd guide me in, I’d thrust my heavy overly sweaty body forward and when id motion back it would fall out. I ended up feeling so embarrassed after a few minutes of this that I took my half hard dick and just rubbed it against their clit using my hand and eventually I thrusting my shaft against them. In the end they came a couple times.

The next time I had sex I was even more out of shape at 273 and it was with a girl who was at least 270 herself. I tried fucking them missionary the same as the fwb but our stomachs were both so big. The same thing happened as before but I got hard enough to stay in. I literally couldnt actually thrust it forward it basically was just weight shifting without any friction. This only lasted a minute before she asked me to fuck her from behind. Her ass was huge and I barely got any friction, also had to rest my stomach on her ass to even get inside a little. She put her hands on the wall and rode my dick and that was the only way anything happened. Id never had it happen before but after about a minute i told her I was going to cum. I meant this to mean “slow down” but she started saying “cum for me baby” and pushed her ass into me harder. I came less than 10 seconds later drenched in sweat and completely out of breath. Id barely done anything. I felt so embarrassed I didnt even try fucking her again. She definitely didnt cum and she barely felt it at all.

I also had an online relationship where I showed her my dick and asked if she thought id be big enough to fuck her from behind or if id need a strap and she said “definitely a strap.” Apparently the first time i sent her a video of me touching myself it started with me being flaccid and between how fat my fupa was, you could only see the head and she thought i had a clit until i got harder. I’m 240 now so its still a small dick but i remember at my highest weight when i was flaccid even peeing had to be done sitting down because i didnt have enough length to aim and id have lean over to get the job done and then wipe up after like a girl. I wish I could have stayed that weight for longer, I really wanted to find a thin girl for the first time in my life just so I could see how disappointing I would be. Ive trained myself to cum in under a couple minutes and someday i hope I can get to be over 300 pounds so I can truly be pathetic. I was so close to buried penis syndrome I know with the right guidance and support I could get myself there and be a bit pathetic neutered fuck toy for someone to abuse and humiliate lol

AGHHHHH i've got a lot to say about this.

this reads like a fantasy scenario i'd post on here. the slow degradation of your sexual nature from average dude to sexual degenerate gets me going.

i've also heard from multiple pigs in my DMs that sex gets very difficult at the 270+ size, with cowgirl being the only suitable position. i can only imagine how difficult that would be if your female partner was also fat. honestly i'm having trouble understand how that would even work, but i digress. the girl's ass being so fat you couldn't even penetrate? honestly i feel bad for everyone in this situation. her riding you and making you cum in thirty seconds surprised me, as if i was in that situation, there's no way i'm letting a pig cum that quickly. omg i would've rode your face for an hour til you calmed your horny ass down

the last paragraph GOT ME. having such a small, covered dick that girls think you have a vulva is crazy. as a thin woman, i've never seen a dick that small in real life. i think the smallest dick of one of my partners was 4 inches, and it was so unsatisfying i swore off sex for the past year 😭 i can only imagine going out with a loser, giving him a chance, and getting home to seeing a one-inch nub between his legs. would you be able to penetrate anything with that? you'd probably have to just get oral for the rest of your life. i wonder how crazy it would feel to have a way smaller surface area, but the same amount of nerves, as an average sized cock. do you think you'd be sensitive? do you think you'd be able to have a vibrator on your little cockhead for more than a few minutes without shooting ropes? do you think if a pretty girl just sucked on your little cock for a few moments, you'd start moaning like a pathetic gooner? you'd want so bad to just fuck her like you used to be able to, but your dick just isn't good enough. you'll probably just end up humping her ass with your gut on her back while you cum down her thighs.

so helpless at sex that you'd just be reduced to sitting under your girl's desk, eating out her cunt while you jerk off your little nub between your fingers. eventually, you might get quite good at it. she might never even let you fuck her again, binding you up in a custom chastity cage because it's not like you can use it anyway.

aghhh thank you for this message small dick anon. i wish more of my inbox messages were like this

[aizawasbrattyprincess]

w h a t’ s  m i n e  i s  m i n e

f!reader x ryomen sukuna (jjk)

tw: nsfw + non-con + monsterfucking + double penetration + breeding + dead dove: do not eat 18+ MINORS DNI

word count: 1.9k

a/n: Kinktober story #2 is with the king, Ryomen Sukuna. I can’t believe I haven’t written a Sukuna smut yet! Anyway, I really enjoyed writing this, but this is really dark, so please read at your own risk! 

⋆ Kinktober Masterlist

buy me a ko-fi?

゜。+。゜゜。*。゜゜。＋。゜*゜。゜。+。゜゜。*。゜゜。＋

“What did you say?” your father challenged, his voice low and dangerous.

Behind him, your mother was silently shaking her head, begging you not to speak your mind. You had obeyed all your parents’ wishes since you were young, never questioning or disagreeing because it was ‘best for you’ even though you hated it. This time, however, it was not an option. You knew your worth, despite being a daughter in a lower-class noble family, and you were not going to tolerate being married off to a family full of misogynists. As poor as you were, you would not stoop down to the current head of the family, Zenin Naoya, and beg your to-be husband to save you and your clan. You wanted to be selfish, just this once. Was it so wrong to search for your own happiness?

Mustering your courage, you firmly replied, “I said no, father. I will not marry him tomorrow.”

“How dare you, wretched bitch!”

Before you even realised it, he had slapped you hard across your face, leaving an angry, red imprint on your cheek. You were foolish to think that your mother would step in and help you. Instead, she had done the opposite, reprimanding you for being rude to your father. You couldn’t believe it. The look in their eyes was enough to tell you that they were both cowards, willing to give you up just so they could survive. They had never cared about you, and you only had yourself to blame for not noticing earlier. This life was cruel, and you have had enough. 

So you left and never looked back, grasping at your only chance at freedom. Ignoring the frantic pleas for you to return, you kept running into the deep forest, knowing no one, not even your parents, would dare to set foot in. No one was that suicidal. After all, there were rumours of a cursed demonic beast living in the forest which mercilessly killed humans should they enter its domain. Unfortunately, no one came back alive to confirm it. But you didn’t care. Whatever monster it was out there couldn’t possibly be worse than Zenin Naoya himself.

You didn’t know how long you had been on the run; all the trees looked the same, and it felt like you had been going around in circles. You were starting to get out of breath when it suddenly poured, the rain drenching you in seconds. With no lamp to guide your way, you trudged forward carelessly, hoping to find shelter in the darkness of the night. Thankfully, you quickly came across what looked to be an abandoned temple that seemed safe enough, so you went in without thinking twice. You could barely step forward without tripping over the uneven stone floor. Then, as if sensing your presence, the torches on the walls lit up all at once, startling you. You could finally see a long, winding corridor ahead of you, beckoning you to keep walking. Taking a deep breath, you kept close to the left wall until you reached a room that was completely bare, save for the empty throne in the middle. You could probably rest until the rain stopped, but something felt terribly wrong. You got the notion that someone, or something, had been watching you ever since you entered the forest.

“Well, well… What do we have here? A lost little bunny, seeking refuge from the storm.”

The low voice came from the throne. An attractive man with tattoos all over his body was sitting on it, legs crossed over the other and his chin resting on his right hand. You started to panic when the room began to transform — the walls disappeared altogether, and skulls and bones were scattered all over the stone floor that was now filled with a thick liquid resembling blood. Maybe it really was blood; you didn’t really want to know. However, everywhere you looked, you couldn’t find a way out. You were trapped.

“Who are you?” you questioned, failing to mask your shaking voice.

“Curious one, aren’t you?” he mused. “The name’s Ryomen Sukuna. I used to rule these lands thousands of years ago, and people revered me like a God. I’m sure you’ve heard of me.”

Ryomen Sukuna. His name was all too familiar. He wasn’t just a monster. He was the King of Curses, responsible for millions of deaths in search of power and glory. It seemed like the rumours of him being resurrected were true after all. If you had remembered correctly, he was dangerous, highly intelligent and manipulative. There was no way you could fight, much less exorcise him. You were no sorcerer; you knew nothing of spells and the like. You needed to figure out how to escape his innate domain before he could make his first move. But with his piercing red eyes staring right into your soul, you froze, too scared to think or even breathe.

“N- no, I don’t think I have. Actually, I’m really sorry. I should probably get going now. My husband will get worried if I’m not home soon.”

“You think I’d let you leave here alive after lying to me? Know your place, lowly human,” Sukuna growled, and you knew you had messed up. “Don’t worry, you’ll make a fine meal.”

He rose from his throne, reaching his full height of over three metres tall and revealing his true demonic form. You hurriedly stepped back as he took a step forward, but all you were doing was prolonging your inevitable death. You didn’t want to die, not like this. However, if you hadn’t left home, you would be living and suffering for days on end, and dying by Ryomen Sukuna’s hand sounded like the much better choice. Accepting your fate, you stood still and closed your eyes, waiting for death, but it never came. 

You felt his hot breath on your neck as he spoke, “Hah, to think I would’ve forgotten the sweet smell of a virgin! I guess it’s our lucky day. I’ll have you as my mate instead.”

With brute strength, his four hands grabbed your clothes and ripped them to shreds, leaving you naked in front of him. Your pathetic cries as you tried to cover yourself up had Sukuna laughing. There was no use in yelling for help; no one would hear you, and even if they did, he would never let them get close to you. Sukuna would’ve loved to see you fight back or run away, taking great joy in the thrill of a chase, but he wasn’t complaining about how downright submissive you were. Poor little bunny, he had frightened you to the core. He picked you up with ease, the tongue of the mouth on his stomach eagerly licking your body to taste how delicious you were. It was cute to see you struggling in his hold as if you could get him to stop. You let out a little yelp as he roughly threw you onto the throne, caging you in his arms.

“You should be thanking me. I never let anyone else sit on my throne.”

Sukuna spread your legs wide open, taking in the sight of your pretty cunt, just waiting to be used. As impatient as he was, he couldn’t fuck you straight away without prepping you. He wouldn’t want you to break before he could have his fun. Getting down on his knees, Sukuna devoured your cunt while his hands busied themselves with playing with your breasts and rubbing your clit. You were ashamed at how wet you already were for a demon like him. No, you weren’t enjoying it. You couldn’t possibly be. Yet, your body felt unbearably hot, and you needed more.

“Fuuuck,” you moaned involuntarily, succumbing to his temptations.

“Bet that feels nice, huh, little bunny?” Sukuna chuckled, looking up to see your flushed face growing redder as he inserted three of his thick fingers inside your cunt.

The foreign sensation made your hips buck forward as another strangled moan escaped your lips. You tried to shove Sukuna away, but the increasing pleasure was starting to cloud your mind. Just before you could reach your high, Sukuna slipped his fingers soaked with your juices from you and removed his kimono, revealing his veiny cocks. It wasn’t just one, but two fat cocks of monstrous length with both heads flushed and dripping with precum. He placed them at your entrance, slowly rubbing against your folds.

“No, no, no! Please, don’t!” you pleaded, hastily shaking your head. There was absolutely no way those things could fit.

“Are all humans so dramatic? Relax, you’ll be fine.”

Sukuna flipped you over before you could protest again. There was a tight grip on your hips. Then, he split you open as his cocks thrust deep inside you, your belly bulging and walls stretched impossibly wide. It hurt so badly that you screamed, but Sukuna paid no attention to your pain, too obsessed with how small and tight you were. He couldn’t remember the last time he had thoroughly enjoyed himself. Your cheeks were damp and streaked, and your legs nearly gave out, but Sukuna held you steady as he drove hard and fast. When you thought you could finally accommodate his size, it felt like he was growing thicker. You orgasmed unexpectedly, spurring Sukuna to bury all of himself inside you until his tips hit your cervix. Your head lolled back, and your body trembled, but he wasn’t planning to stop any time soon, his unrestrained pace making you see stars that you thought you were blacking out. Sukuna’s sharp teeth sunk into the skin on your neck, claiming you as his while one of his hands returned to your neglected clit, harshly rubbing it until you squirted everywhere. You thought you had heard him whispering praises in your ear, but your desperate whines were too loud to make out the words.

Waves after waves of pleasure washed away the pain, and it felt like hours until his hips began to stutter. With a final few thrusts and a satisfied grunt, Sukuna pumped his seed into your womb, stuffing you to the brim and not letting a single drop go of it to waste. He finally pulled out of your abused cunt and admired your exhausted body, littered with bite markings and dried blood, now slumped against the throne. Your eyes began to flutter close, and you were about to pass out when you felt Sukuna moving you. Draping his kimono over your body, he pulled you onto his lap as he sat on his throne. You leaned into his broad chest as he gently caressed your dishevelled hair, lulling you to sleep. Sukuna found it amusing that you were so quick to trust him, and all he needed to do was show you a bit of affection.

“When you’ve rested enough, I’ll fuck you again and again until the only thing you can think of is having my cocks in you all the time. But,” Sukuna warned, forcing you to look up at him. “If you're not pregnant in the next few months, I will enjoy torturing you to death for wasting my time. Understand?”

Heart sinking into despair, you were rudely reminded of the role you were made to accept. Perhaps this was your punishment for all your sins, and there was nothing else you could do but nod. Sukuna grinned at your compliance and rewarded you with a tender but possessive kiss.

“Now, sleep tight and sweet dreams, little bunny.”

゜。+。゜゜。*。゜゜。＋。゜*゜。゜。+。゜゜。*。゜゜。＋

[sleepyorchidmonster]

After Chapter 7, Malleus and by extension Briar Valley had to deal with plenty of backlash.

In an attempt to appease the public (and control Malleus), the Senate organized a press conference with world leaders and NRC parents (there's A LOT of overlap between those two groups).

The main idea was to show the Senate as capable advisors that would guide the young Draconia, cementing their status in Briar Valley while also "protecting" and isolating Malleus.

What really happened was that Mrs. Rosehearts yelled at them for ten hours straight.

You see, Riddle was worried about how his mother would react to the entire Chapter 7 situation, so he made sure to explain everything to her, casting Malleus and Lillia in a more favourable light.

And it acually worked! You see, despite all her failures as a parent, she is still a mother at the end of the day, and the idea that a son would go to such great lenghts, overblotting and almost dooming the entire world, just to keep his parental figure safe, was quite touching.

She also has a newfound respect for Lillia, how he spent all those years looking for ways to get Malleus to hatch, how he went above and beyond to care for the Prince, even while banished, how he adopted and raised Silver (who is the only student she actually respects). HOW HE LITERALLY SACRIFICED PART OF HIS LIFEFORCE FOR MALLEUS TO HATCH!

On the other hand, she HATES the Senate. Mostly because she put herself in Meleanor's shoes: imagine you're about to die and decide to entrust your unborn son to your friend, only for said friend to be unjustly banished, leaving your kid in the hands of a bunch of entitled senators that completely DISREGARDED YOUR LAST WISH (Mrs. Rosehearts hates it when people don't do what she says, so she feels personally offended by that last bit, the fact that Malleus almost died also doesn't help).

Anyway, she's angry and, since the Senate IS encouraging people to air their grievances with Briar Valley, might as well seize this opportunity!

Malleus, Silver, Sebek, Lillia, Baul and Maleficia feel vindicated. Since only the housewardens and Diasomnia were invited for the event, the group chat was crazy.

The housewardens were all sitting together near the back of the room, alongside Silver and Sebek (they DON'T want to draw attention to themselves, especially since most of them are overblot survivors), so they could easily chat or sleep. Meanwhile the students back on campus were watching everything at Ramshackle.

As a small bonus, a few ways to avoid panic attacks, by Riddle and Trey:

*Mrs. Rosehearts starts talking*

Trey: Hey Rook!

Rook: Oui?

Trey: What is the meaning of beauty?

Rook: :D

*Rook starts monologuing and nobody can hear the TV anymore*

Meanwhile Riddle:

*School chat*

Epel: So, how long until she stops yelling at people? It ain't funny anymore...

Riddle: Since she yelled at Trey's parents for five hours because they gave me a tart, maybe ten or fifteen hours?

Ruggie: Wtf

Deuce: Are you doing okay, dormhead?

Riddle: I have a fully charged phone with a crosswords app, headphones playing all the Queen's rules on loop, and an entire bottle filled with the strongest calming tea I could find.

Riddle: Moreover, I'm currently seated beside the sleepiest students in this school (Leona and Silver). Their calm disposition creates a peaceful environment.

Riddle: Therefore I shall be able to keep panic attacks AND overblots at bay!

Ace: Just say yes or no...

*15 minutes later*

Riddle: I beat the game, there are no more crosswords

Vil: Chess.com

Vil: NOW

Vil: Wake Leona up, we're having a TOURNAMENT!

Idia: Congrats, u just got a World Record

Idia: Also I'm sending you a list of games later...

They left a bit after the seventh hour mark.