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aerialflight · 3 years

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Fic Rec (it's been too long and I read a whole lot of fics)

I've read so many fics these past couple of months and my need to share them to the world has seized me by the throat. Please enjoy and support these fanfic writers! They are the best. XD

[Naruto]

Nine-Tailed Foxes are Dead by RowlettLesbian

Ship: Shikamaru/Naruto

For Konoha, it's been one month since the preliminary Chunin exams. For Naruto, it's been six. And he wasn't in Konoha.

At the end of his ordeal, Naruto walks into the Chunin Exam finals without his left arm.

Shikamaru is very concerned. And, eventually, very precious to Naruto as they work together to solve the mysteries of Konoha and bring kindness to the Shinobi world, one adventure at a time.

(I would die for this fic. I know the summary sounds doom and gloom but IT'S NOT. This fic made me fucking cry, I don't think I've ever read a fic that characterized Naruto so right. He's so full of hope and love and develops into the best version of himself and I'm so HERE FOR IT. And it's not just Naruto, Shikamaru is absolutely amazing here along with Kakashi and surprise surprise Ino, I can't BELIEVE it took me this long to stumble across this fic. Also THE WORLDBUILDING IS TO DIE FOR!!! And the plot! Is! So! Interesting! Just, everything about this fic is just amazing so please PLEASE read this!!!)

The End of the Uchiha by RowlettLesbian

Ship: Naruto/Sasuke

“I promise, little electric spirit of this shrine,” he whispered into the soft dirt and fallen leaves, “I will never gain the eyes. I will never pass them on. And I will make sure the eyes end in my brother, so that they can’t hurt anybody anymore. I will be the last Uchiha, and see to the end of the Copy-Wheel Clan. Then all of the hatred here can stop, and my family can rest peacefully. I promise, little shrine.”

Sasuke is more than his brother thinks he is. He's more than any Uchiha has ever been. He will kill his brother, but it will not be vengeance.

It will be mercy.

(Same author as the one above, they are the gift that keeps on giving. Seriously, HOW did I NEVER FIND THESE FICS before now??? One of life's greatest mysteries. The author's sense of humor is so on point here along with the atmospheric writing that's so vivid in the mind. Their writing style is so recognizable to me now and makes me fall into the world they're creating, it's stunning. Sasuke here makes me want to hug him and the idea of him living like a feral ghibli character has me LIVING. Check the tags of the fic, all of it is true, hand to god. Please give all of the author's fics a shot, it's a rabbit hole I'm thankful I fell into!)

mil fantasmas (gritan en calma) by LegaciesandMemories

Post-Tsukuyomi, something in Uchiha Sasuke's mind shatters. The same night, Yamanaka Ino falls asleep and doesn't wake up for 15 days.

---

In which Ino and Sasuke both wake from the aftermath of the Uchiha Massacre with the ability to see ghosts, and no one is prepared for the fallout.

(This fic has arrested my curiosity and eagerness to know what will happen next. These poor kids need so many hugs and Ino is getting the spotlight she deserves. I am so excited for this fic and what it has in store! Please read! XD)

Lichtenberg Figures by Asteroid_Duck (JustThatOneGirl1815)

Name: Kakashi Hatake Rank: Jounin Status: Missing Nin Missing Since: June 15th, 271 AD Note: Flee on Sight . . . Haburashi looked his team in the eyes— three, fresh out of the Academy genin— and resolved to teach them as best as he could. And right now, his lesson was simple: “Stay. Away. From. Kakashi. Hatake.”

(Dimension travel fic with a slice of Kakashi being an absolute troll and dealing with the shitty hand he's been dealt with. Seriously, the man has the worst luck in all of Konoha. Also, the mystery of the other Kakashi's history has me leaning by the edge of my seat, I need to know.)

The Governess by Ysmirel

Ship: Kakashi/OFC

"“What,” he finally asked, “is so funny?”

Ibara bit her lower lip to keep the chuckles in, still smiling and making absolutely no effort to get more space between them, seemingly perfectly at ease within reach of a trained shinobi. Her self-control wasn't all that good, as she ended up snorting and was overcame once again by another fit of laughter. “I just- It's just-” She struggled to speak, trying to catch her breath and wiping away tears of mirth with the hand that wasn't still holding onto his vest. Finally, she looked him in the eye and said, with a smile that was all teeth and without a hint of her previous drunken stupor, “and who's going to believe you?”

As he stood there, stunned by her words and change in demeanor, he realized with dawning horror that she was right."

In which Kakashi finds himself at the other end of the troll shtick, and he doesn't appreciate it all that much.

(It's so hard to find self-insert fics with a fresh concept these days, especially in the naruto fandom. Not that I don't enjoy and devour a lot of self insert fics like it's going out of style, but it's just so nice to find something new and shiny and really damn good. I'm so pumped for this fic and how it's going to develop so please join me in rooting for this fic!)

half a league (until the valley of death) by SpectersShadow117

Kakashi can think of no reason for Sasuke's inexplicable and drastic change in behavior. He doesn't like the desperate, haunted gleam in his student's eyes, and he also doesn't like the nagging feeling that he's missing something very important. Aka: Future Sasuke goes to Past Sasuke and gives him a reality check with Specific Intentions, but as with most Uchiha, his methods leave much to be desired. (Featuring: Childhood trauma FTW, Konoha's shitty care of orphans, and absolutely no one having a fun time.)

(Sasuke wanting to change the future out of complete and utter spite has me LIVING. Sasuke is such a Mess here and the twist on the time travel premise is so good and the kid is so Traumatized and Desperate and Not Having A Good Time. Naruto and Sakura developing as better ninjas and Kakashi trying his best makes me want to scream. Also, how Sasuke thinks about Itachi makes me want to cackle. I am 100% down for this. I am rooting for this kid, go get them! XD)

[Harry Potter]

fruit loops in time (circle around me) by justprompts

Ships: Harry/Draco, Remus/Sirius

"This is Crabbe, and Goyle," the blonde boy says, pointing at the two boys next to him. "And I'm Malfoy, Draco Ma - "

Ron laughs, and Malfoy immediately bristles.

"Think my name's funny, do you?" Malfoy says, angrily. "No need to ask yours - "

"You're honestly so cute," Ron interrupts, yet again, shaking his head. "So tiny. And so angry, all the time. It's adorable."

Alternatively Ron Weasley, Time Traveller Extraordinaire, is stuck in the same seven year Hogwarts Loop, repeating the same thing over and over again. Naturally, he's so done with everything.

(This is the greatest hp fic I've ever read. I LOVE RON WEASLEY and by the time you read this fic SO WILL YOU!! This is the fic I WISH I have the ability to write. I read this entire fic aloud to my brother and we spent literal hours howling and talking about how utterly insane and incredible this fic is, it's amazing. This is hands down my favorite Ron Weasley. You Can Pry This Fic From My Cold Dead Fingers.)

[Boku no Hero Academia]

Kacchan's Cult by Ourliazo

Pro Hero Ground Zero is attacked, originally meant to be de-aged out of existence by a desperate villain but is instead launched into his 14-year-old self.

But Katsuki is a fucking pro so whatever, time to fuck up someone's day. And sure, maybe he's only one man, but that's why he conscripts the entirety of the UA student body into tearing down some criminal empires.

(It's time travel, crack, and Bakugou being his usual explody, competent self. What more in life do you want? Seriously though, please read. I'm obsessed with this fic and having a Good Time!)

Cleaning Crew; Teaching Kids to Value their Safety, for Fun and Profit by Reavv

Takenaka Hideo is a thirty-two year old, in mild desperation for money, who has just been hired as a new janitor for UA's support staff. He has a quirk that lets him find lost objects, a liaison with the police because of it, and desperate desire for competent co-workers.

Oh, and he's already lived a previous life, in a world where quirks and heroes didn't even exist.

Not a big deal, though. It's not like you ever see the janitor playing a big part in action movies. He's here to get paid, and that's it.

On the opposite side of the equation, class 1-A has to wonder at the new UA cryptid that always seems to show up when things are on fire, and who keeps trying to convince them to let the adults handle the fire extinguisher.

(A great deal of fun packed into one fic. That is how I title this fic and nothing will change my mind! Hideo just wants to quietly do his job and not get in the way. I Relate. Please read!)

Poltergeist by WriterGreenReads

Class 1-A is haunted.

Well, not really.

I AM dead, though.

World's friendliest poltergeist, at your service.

(I don't know how I got so sucked into OC fics, but I found some fantastic fics along the way so I have no regrets. The author really tries to push the premise and I just love all the interactions and dynamics that form as the fic gets further in. And the OC character and all the hijinks they get up to cracks me up! At the same time, it's pretty heartwarming and it's practically a friendships galore fic! Definitely recommend it!)

invincible by supercrunch for Engrin

Ship: Bakugou/Midoriya

This is the way the world works: the sun rises in the east. The strong come out on top. Bakugou Katsuki rockets through life like a comet and Midoriya Izuku stumbles after. If he believed in such things Katsuki would say it was written in the stars. That some god of war had looked at him and said this one. That he’d been passed along a line to get his blessings – genius, willpower, fearless ambition – and dropped off on earth.

Then, of course, there is the question of Deku. The spitfire runt. Deku, no matter what the world does to him, never stops hoping.

Until, of course, he eventually does.

(Katsuki broke him. Snapped him in half like a twig and now has to scramble to put Deku back together. “We can do this, Deku," he says slowly. "There are so many mysteries that never got put to bed. Criminals roaming around looking to hurt people and you and me, we can fix that.”

There’s a long pause. The comforter slips a little off Deku’s skinny shoulders and drowns him. “You mean like a team?”

In that split second, Katsuki makes a decision he’s never even considered. He swallows his pride. “Yeah, Deku. We’d be a team.”)

(If there was any other way canon could've gone, this is the story I would've wanted. It's perfect.)

Inadvertent Wilderness Therapy by Cacid

Following an unfortunate encounter with a teleporter on the last day of internships, Bakugou Katsuki and Hakamata Tsunagu spend some quality time in northern Canada.

In no particular order they will: build ugly survival shelters, stalk rabbits, run from polar bears, reflect on the chemical composition of trees, insult each other, and complain about krumholtz.

(THESE TWO. TOGETHER. IN THE WILDERNESS. IN FUCKING CANADA OF ALL PLACES. I still can't believe this fic actually exists and just how INVESTED I became in their relationship. Blue Jeanist instantly became my favorite ranked hero with this fic alone. HIS SENSE OF HUMOR IS TERRIBLE, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH FNIEWOPAF. BAKUGOU DOES TOO. IT'S FUCKING INCREDIBLE. *incoherent screeching into the wild*)

[Stranger Things]

Baci D'aria by RabbitDarling

“Love is worth the sum of itself, and nothing more.” ― Alice Hoffman, Practical Magic

Steve learned a lot at his Aunt's side before she passed but his favourite thing she taught him was baci d'aria; special little spells that you created from the heart and put into the food you shared.

In opening his heart and gifts to those around him Steve slowly finds himself a family in a way he never thought he'd get to experience. One by One he collects pre-teens to trail in his wake like ducklings and Steve can't even refute it by the time he realizes what has happened.

(This fic is so soft and Steve is just collecting people and winning them over with his magical food (literally). I am always a sucker for heartwarming, good for the soul fics so if you want to make yourself hungry and feel all warm and gooey inside, read this!)

(Don't Fear) The Reaper by TeaFourTwo

Ship: Steve/Billy

He looks down at the blood on his hands and on the floor and wonders why the memory hasn’t broken yet, why he isn’t back in Starcourt mall with control of his body again, wonders if he's even still alive at all. Is this hell then? Or perhaps purgatory? It certainly isn’t heaven, that’s for sure. None of this makes any sense…but then what's new—nothing in Billy’s life makes sense anymore.

Billy laughs then, loud and long and unhinged. It's the only sound in the whole house, and it bounces off the walls like a fucked up echo, like the world is laughing with him.

“Jesus christ you’re insane…” It’s Max’s voice and it’s shaking. It only makes Billy laugh harder, because Max has it all wrong. Billy isn’t crazy, it’s the rest of the world that’s insane.

Billy dies a hero of sorts. He wakes up back in his bed on Saturday morning, the third of November, 1984...nearly nine months earlier.

(Billy is stuck in a time loop and it's slowly driving him crazy. And the fic shows just how much influence Billy did have in the plot and how doomed the world is without him in it. Great character exploration with Billy's character and all the ways he's so messy and human. Definitely recommend it!)

[Knives Out]

The Road Less Traveled By by UisceOneLove

Ship: Marta/Ransom

If Harlan wants to leave Ransom to be on his own, fine. He'll show him just what Ransom Drysdale is capable of.

or, where Ransom chooses to prove his abilities through means of the non-homicidal variety and finds himself becoming exactly what Harlan was hoping he would.

(I found this fic out of sheer chance and god, Ransom is just, so fascinating to me as a character. Marta of course is the Best here and I will forever stan her. Seriously, this is such a good fic! Please read!)

[Haikyuu!!]

Sky Full of Stars by grilledsquids

The Hinatas are twins. They're practically identical.

But while Shouyou seeks out Karasuno's volleyball team to become the next Little Giant, Natsu is scouted to to play soccer for Shiratorizawa. While Shouyou sets his eyes on playing volleyball at the highest level possible, his sister wonders how much longer she can play soccer... and if it's worth it to keep going.

A Natsu-centric story featuring: Shiratorizawa VBC shenanigans, too many soccer OCs, mild teenage drama, a little bit of plot, and Semi Eita not knowing what a period is.

(It's just!! So cute and wholesome!!! The Shiratorizawa volleyball team is so fleshed out along with the OC characters for the girl's soccer team and I swear, it's been a long while since I've laughed this much at the sheer shenanigans that happen in a fic. It's surprisingly hard to find good gen fics in this fandom so finding this gem made me so happy! If you want a fic that brings a smile to your face, read this!!)

like water by speakingincode

Ship: Oikawa/Kageyama

“Oikawa,” Iwaizumi says, and when Tooru looks at him, he can read My best friend’s an idiot off the crease of his eyebrows. “Are you telling me you spent the last three years weirdly obsessed with Kageyama – I still remember the time you made us play him on a dumb whim, you know – and now you’re at his beck and call? Are you okay? What the hell is wrong with you?”

“I’m— I’m not at his beck and call! I said no last week. It’s… It’s like you said. I get bored easily. I saw him at the park a couple weeks after they played Nationals and called him a perfect little tyrant, and he pestered me into spending time with him after,” Tooru says. “I’m not a monster, Iwa-chan. If he wants the company of his cool, handsome ex-upperclassman that badly, who am I to begrudge him?”

Or: Oikawa doesn't know why Kageyama keeps asking to meet him on Saturdays. He also doesn't know why he keeps saying yes.

(The fact this fic is canon-compliant and covers post-canon too makes me want to shout to the heavens. Fucking incredible! One of the best Oikakage fics ever and it's a crime how it's not at the top of the ship tag. Please please read!!)

twist into your shape by kakkoweeb

Ship: Oikawa/Kageyama

The only thing better than sweets were sweets containing paper that told you whether your future would be good or bad--or in Kageyama and Oikawa's case, paper that somehow caused you to live inside each other's bodies.

(Everyone probably already read this fic but it needs to be said, you need to read this fic. How these two try and manage each other's lives and slowly start to care about one another is so beautiful and sincere and I am ready to wrestle anyone to the floor and comply them into reading this fic. Doesn't matter if you like the ship, you will become a fan if you read it, I promise. Please please read!!)

Take the Long Road Home by pepperfield

Ship: Kuroo/Sawamura

When Azumane Asahi goes missing before his engagement meeting with Kozume Kenma, what other option is there but for Daichi to impersonate his brother and fake his way through a first date with Asahi's fiance?

Okay, let's be realistic - there were probably at least four other options.

Unfortunately, Tetsurou couldn't come up with any of them either, so now he's here flirting with Kenma's future husband while trying to keep his web of deceit from collapsing.

It's going to be an eventful day.

(I got obsessed with this ship alongside Oikakage and SO WILL YOU. THE POTENTIAL. THE BANTER. THE FACT THEY'RE BOTH DORKS AND THE FIC HAS IDENTITY SHENANIGANS DANCING ALL OVER IT!! I had so much fun reading this and these two are MEANT TO BE FENIWPAF. If you don't see the potential of this ship, you will now.)

a misunderstanding a day keeps the boyfriend away by bartallen for betuls

Ship: Kuroo/Sawamura

Kuroo doesn’t fall in love hard and fast like many others do – he falls slowly, and very very softly. Most of the times he doesn’t even realise he’s in love with someone until it’s too late.

(Kuroo is the dumbest man alive and I've never related to someone so hard in my life. God help me.)

You like me. by roseknight

Ship: Daishou/Kuroo

Kuroo nearly lived a Daishou-free life, and sometimes he looked back and wondered how much better and how much worse that would've been.

(I didn't even know who Daishou was until I read this fic and now I can't unsee the potential this ship has. I'm a ruined woman and I regret NOTHING.)

Kings of the Road, Kings of the Universe by EzzyDean

Eight magical captains, one bus, an entire summer (and country) waiting for them.

What could possibly go wrong?

(The magic of friendship meets the magic of a summer road trip meets pure magic.)

(CAPTAIN SQUAD IS THE BEST SQUAD SOMEBODY PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SEND ME SOME CAPTAIN SQUAD FICS I AM SO IN LOVE WITH THIS SQUAD IT'S A PROBLEM AAAAHHHHHH!)

宿縁 : See You Soon by MissKiraBlue

Ship: Oikawa/Kageyama

Upon arriving at the train station of death, an impure soul is granted a second chance at life against his will. Reincarnating into the body of Kageyama Tobio, a 15-year-old boy who recently committed suicide. Tobio's soul will depart at death and the soul needs to slip in to replace it. If the soul's reformation succeeds, he’ll reenter the cycle of rebirth and regain the right to be reborn. He will have three months to accomplish this task.

“Even though you had enough of life,” the soul whispered into the void of the room, “you were still afraid to hurt your hands, Tobio.”

Afraid of giving himself a scar, if he survived.

He touched his pulse and grasped life and couldn’t help but pity Kageyama Tobio.

"You wanted to die and now I’m here making you live again," he whispered into the night.

(I'm not even exaggerating when I say out of all the fics in this entire goddamn, too long list, this is the fic I'm anticipating and heart eyeing the most. It's only starting, but I already cried on chapter fucking 2, the power of this fic, holy shit. The author also wrote the hq time loop Every Tomorrows series, which I have an undying love for and am full on praying for the day it updates, so you KNOW this fic will be just as good. (Anybody who hasn't read this series, where the hell have you been?? Read it!!) Just, everything about this fic hurts me and something in my chest just aches when I read this fic. Go into it blind with an open heart and I swear to you, it's going to change your life. I'm already calling it. Seriously though, please please read!)

[Crossover]

Learning to Fly by Asteroid_Duck (JustThatOneGirl1815)

Fandoms: Boku no Hero Academia, Naruto

The number three hero is a walking (well, flying) contradiction in every sense of the word. This includes his teaching skills. Why had Tokoyami agreed to this internship again? Oh right. He’d thought he was actually going to learn something. …….remind him to never be so optimistic again. . . . OR, Kakashi Hatake is reincarnated as the pro hero, Hawks. Tokoyami Fumikage suffers as a result.

(The reincarnation fic I never thought I needed and it's so good!! I've never really paid attention to Tokoyami and this fic sent me headfirst into loving him. Their dynamic is so interesting and I just love how their relationship develops. Also, Kakashi trolling the poor kid made me cackle, it's great! Definitely recommend it!)

Si Vis Pacem by athenoot

Fandoms: Boku no Hero Academia, John Wick

Everything has a price. That's what John has always known and will forever remember, even in death.

Which is pretty ironic considering his current circumstance.

Instead of a grown, scarred, weary body belonging to a man as cruel and broken as him, he's inhabiting a younger, smaller, unblemished one belonging to a child with strangely colored hair, and is living in what seems to be a superhuman society.

Well. May it never be said that John isn't a strategist. He can live with this. Maybe.

(Somewhere out there in the universe, he's certain he could hear the laughter of his enemies from beyond the grave.)

Or: John Wick is reincarnated as Midoriya Izuku. The world should probably watch its back.

(This should be one of the crackiest fics I've read in a while, but it's taken so seriously and I'm so HERE FOR THIS. John Wick being John Wick in a world of quirks and heroes is the GREATEST, honestly, he's so badass. Bakugou, I feel for you, you must be so fucking confused lol. Bakugou trying his best to be a good friend is one of the best things about this fic. Trust me, this fic will make your day, promise!)

A Girl's Mind is a Dangerous Place by clenastia

Fandoms: Naruto, Fairy Tail

Natsu wakes up in Sakura's body. It only gets worse from there. Also known as: In Which Natsu has No Idea what to do with Boobs.

(I binged this in two fucking days, I couldn't put it down. This fic reminded me why I liked fairy tail when I was younger and why Natsu is honestly such a great protagonist, god. And the fic does that thing, you know, the Thing where when two worlds collide, the characters struggle to acclimate and adapt to a completely another world with different rules and mindsets against their own. This fic is seriously one of the best when it comes to that aspect, it's incredible. I am going absolutely feral over here for this fic to update, I'm waiting in the wings, ready to pounce like a tiger, all the metaphors man. For the love of god, read this fic.)

Give me a landscape made of obstacles by Melise

Fandoms: Naruto, Natsume's Book of Friends

Kakashi Hatake isn’t who he says he is.

Because the truth is that he’s actually a youkai in disguise, a wolf spirit named Madara who stumbled across the Hatake clan during the Warring States Period. Intrigued by the shinobi he saw, he’d proposed a temporary alliance in which he would offer the clan protection in exchange for their teachings.

Decades later, Madara is surprised to find himself inadvertently summoned to Konoha by the last living member of the Hatake clan. Sakumo Hatake, who is mourning the recent deaths of his wife and stillborn child, doesn’t want to be alone anymore. So with his permission, Madara takes the place of Sakumo’s deceased son in order to watch over the last Hatake.

(Fusion in which the youkai of Natsume’s Book of Friends all exist in the Naruto world. No knowledge of Natsume’s Book of Friends required).

(Before this fic, I only had a very vague idea of what Natsume's Book of Friends was, and honestly, I still don't know much about it. But I didn't really need to know to get into this fic. I love the worldbuilding and the relationships Kakashi forms, both supernatural and mortal. I love how Kakashi's inhumane ways affect others around him, whether to stress them out or become used to the strange. You can go straight into this fic without knowing anything and absolutely still have a fantastic time. I definitely recommend this so please read!)

#Fanfiction #AO3 #Fic Rec #Fic Rec List #Naruto #Harry Potter #Boku no Hero Academia #Stranger Things #Knives Out #Haikyuu!!#Crossover #John Wick #Fairy Tail #Natsume's Book of Friends

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sneverussape · 3 years

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snape fic recs - old magic/epic worldbuilding

related to this post. i decided to dig through my bookmarks and wrack my brain for some of the fics i remember reading that scratched this particular itch. this will have fics that had the characters practice old magic and are more focused on the adults/hogwarts staff rather than the kids, or if the kids would be mentioned they would not be the main povs. these will be multi-chaptered, often long (and obviously au), and some of them have pairings. please heed the tags and warnings that the individual authors would have left; what you consume is your own responsibility. the fics are also listed in no particular order:

In His Name by moira of the mountain - After the Final Battle, a fallen Snape is hidden, bearing Tom Riddle's last Unforgivable. There are three Secret Keepers and a Muggle healer to protect him, but will it be love - or an obligation - which finally frees him? - no pairings // kinda brotp between mcgonagall, snape, and hagrid // also unfinished so fair warning. the lore is so rich though, it feels like how magic in hp should have been.

Death’s Dominion by MMADfan - Severus Snape’s life was changed when he was hit by an errant spell, and he comes to a decision that defies Dumbledore’s wishes. Even the fate of the wizarding world is altered by this ill-cast curse and Snape’s subsequent resolve.Long after the spell has dissipated, its effects continue echoing in the lives of Severus, Albus, Minerva, and Hermione, and they bring with them a shadowy figure whom Snape does not trust and whose motivations and influence on Minerva are murky. Not all is as it seems, and conspiracies and schemes swirl around Severus as he continues on his path of deception to his final confrontation with the Dark Lord. A “Light” fic of love, loyalty, and redemption. - mm/ad, ss/hg // this fic. is LEGENDARY. this is one of those fics that require your full attention and will eventually suck you in and spit you back out with your whole life changed. it will take you on a whole rollercoaster of emotions. the mm/ad pairing is quite an obvious one but the ss/hg is a subtle one and it’s more friendship throughout the whole fic than an actual romantic relationship. the ocs (a lot of them minerva’s family) are also SO well-made you’ll forget they’re not canon.

FALLING FURTHER IN by kaz2 - Hermione begins to learn something of the man behind the dark sarcasms of the classroom. - ss/hg, also features wolfstar, brotp between the faculty and severus // this was one of the fics i had in mind when i did that last post about missing old hp stories. this was started in the early 2000s and the author had free rein on a lot of the material. flitwick and sprout are married here and are the cutest things on earth. it’s also set during the summer leading into harry’s final year so all the teachers are staying at hogwarts and are all good friends with each other. hermione is there as well because her parents had been murdered by death eaters and so she’s spending it with them. the way the ww is written here is so...epic, jkr couldn’t even. snape lives in an invisible tower called serpens tower, the teachers often go to a brothel-which-isn’t-really-a-brothel in hogsmeade, the other teachers often baby severus subtly because he’s the youngest, wolfstar are tolerable and remus actually learns to brew his own damn wolfsbane, etc. the story is in story format until near the end iirc and then the author outlines what happens next rather than writing it out. i can’t blame them; it really is a massive undertaking.

The Crest by sheankalor - Dumbledore only holds partial say in who the Head of House is. Severus Snape is nominated as the Head of Slytherin, but has to pass a final test. Can he? Does he work well with the other three Heads of House? And just what is The Crest? - no pairings // staff fic // one of the rare one-shots but it’s in an au which feeds into other stories // i loooove the lore in this. it provides an explanation as to how a house head is approved by the school and i’m a sucker for any fic that has the faculty getting along.

Balance by rabbit and -v-Jinx-v - Hogwarts is under siege, and it's going to take everyone to find a way out of danger. - no pairings // brotp minerva and severus, also harry and draco form a friendship // this is one of my personal faves. it’s not only old magics but the entirety of hogwarts come together to battle against dark forces (not even death eaters but...balrogs...and other things). there’s no build-up to it; you enter the story after the battle’s already begun and then you get taken along for the ride. also has a part where the heads of houses meet the founders and there’s this epic dance that’s reminiscent of the danse macabre in The Graveyard Book (if you’ve read that you’d know what i mean).

Another World by Aeryn Alexander - Detention with Snape turns into something of an adventure for Hermione and Ginny, not to mention Professor Lupin, as they all discover that Hogwarts holds a terrible secret that none of them want to learn. - ss/hg, rl/gw // this fic took me by surprise because i didn’t expect it to go the way it did based on the summary lmao. the 4 basically get trapped in a mirror version of hogwarts after a potions accident, and the mirror world has literal demons in it. they have to find a way to get back into the real world while not getting killed at the same time. i actually liked lupin in this one and he and severus form a tenuous friendship.

In One Spirit by mavidian - Voldemort and Dumbledore prepare for war and survival. Plans go awry, intrigues abound and nothing is what it seems. Snape created the Dark Mark but that mistake may cost him everything. Can Hermione be his saving grace? - ss/hg but it’s such a slow build you barely notice it during even the first 20 or so chapters because he’s his usual asshole self and they’re too busy trying to protect hogwarts // the concept of this fic and the lore it built up...wow. the faculty are all friends and they’re trying very hard to protect hogwarts using their own magics and their own clever schemes (war brooms? battle wands? blessing tree? filch even gets powers!). voldemort is also equally devious here and snape has loving pureblood parents! (not that it matters, he’s still an ass, but then it’s nice to read about him having a nice family for once). neville also steps up as a member of one of the Traditional Families so he’s quite a BAMF here.

yo pls feel free to add your own recs to this post, i’m pretty sure there are loads more out there!

#fic recs #old magics #worldbuilding #snape #hp

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ghostlywritten · 3 years

Text

If Only I Had Stayed In The Shadows - Chapter Five

James Potter x OC

Words: 3,5k

Prologue Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four

Time flies fast when you have fun. And I had a lot of fun for a week after the party. Despite the harsh weather, despite the essays piling up, despite the training sessions getting tougher it was all worth it in the end when I was left alone in the Common Room with James, chatting about everything and anything. Occasionally even Sirius, Remus and Peter would join us if they weren't in the mood to go to sleep yet and we would play Chess or Exploding Snap.

Of course I knew I would never be part of their unique friendship quartet but I was glad they would let me join in on their fun from time to time. Though I suspected they mainly missed James and didn't want to abstain from him too much.

One particular evening left me alone with Sirius and a few empty bottles of Firewhiskey after Remus and Peter decided to head to bed early and James insisted on retrieving some midnight snacks, sneaking off with a Disillusionment Charm. How he had managed that spell when we hadn't learned it in class was beyond me. Anyways, this got to be the first time I had ever been in the lonely presence of the school's heartthrob with no one and nothing in the near vicinity to distract him from me.

I swallowed nervously whilst the dark-haired boy seemed pretty relaxed, his posture slouched in his armchair.

"You know, I do wonder sometimes how things come together," Sirius' voice cut into the silence and I looked up from my fiddling fingers in my lap to see him pensively watch the flames flicker around in the fireplace, the light giving his features a warm glow.

"In what way?" I asked quietly, not wanting to somehow interrupt his peaceful posture.

"I mean, the way things have turned out in the end," he said, waving his hand to gesture around us, "Everything that brought us to the point of sitting here in the Common Room of the Gryffindors in the middle of the night. I got the best friends I had ever imagined I would get. Ever." I smiled at this. "I'm a Gryffindor, which is the least likely house a Black would get in. I ran away from home and am living with my best friend the life and with the family I've always dreamt of." Now this wasn't exclusive news. Everyone knew about Sirius' escape from the Black House last summer and that he was staying at the Potter's. I was sure a lot of people had their opinions on it but were clever enough to not voice them out, at least not with any Marauder nearby.

I was a little surprised however that he opened up about it when he had refused to say anything on the matter for the past months. One glance at the empty bottles on the table gave me the answer though. 'Everyone gets a loose tongue after a few drinks. Good thing I don't drink...much.'

"I'm glad you are out of there," I said sincerely, recalling the one time I had been pushed into the boy's locker room by my fellow female, giggling team members and had caught a glimpse of the many bruises on his back. I didn't know why but I immediately had a hunch that those hadn't only been from Quidditch. They had looked too nasty. My attempts to talk about child abuse with him were instantly cut off by the boy himself, the cold glare still giving me chills even in mere memory.

"Me too," Sirius sighed blissfully, "The Potter's are truly the best."

"Now all that is missing is the future Mrs. Black," I teased.

He wiggled his eyebrows, "I have encountered a lot of worthy candidates so far. Wanna be next?"

"Thanks, but I'd rather not catch anything," I replied, wiggling my eyebrows back at him. He gave me a mock affronted look before he smirked devilishly, my breath catching involuntarily at the handsome enhancement of his features, "Don't worry, I wouldn't ever date the future Mrs. Potter."

I almost choked on my spit, "Excuse me?"

"Oh, you heard me just right," he barked out a laugh at my red face, "And you can't tell me there is nothing going between you two."

"Ehm, I can because there is nothing going on between us," I retaliated, forcing down the blush from my cheeks.

"You don't have to hide it from me," Sirius said with a shrug, his shit-eating grin still ever so present on his face and I grimaced at him, "I don't blame you. And the Potter's are the best family you can meet."

"Sounds like heaven," I replied deadpanned and he nodded his head with wide eyes and a straight grin before he reached for his forgotten half-empty glass of Firewhiskey. Sobering up slightly, I pondered on my next words before voicing them out carefully, "Don't you miss your actual family though?"

"Hm?" Sirius hummed but I knew he had heard me clearly, stalling as he took a long sip of his drink.

"You don't have to answer that if you don't want to," I added hastily when I noticed how his features hardened, "I'm just a curious cat, wondering if I could ever leave my family like that."

"Do they abuse you mentally and physically every hour of the day?"

"Ehm...no."

"Then you don't have to wonder about it," Sirius said darkly, "You can consider yourself one of the luckiest people on earth." I kept quiet, watching him close his eyes and breathe in deeply through his nose. 'Maybe I should have just kept quiet like always,' I thought, mentally kicking my tactless ass.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked," I apologised softly, looking down at my lap awkwardly. Hearing him sigh made me peek at him through my lashes, "It's okay, Cec." I beamed in relief at the nickname. "My family is just a touchy subject."

"I get it, you don't want anything to do with them," I agreed quickly, trying not to agitate him further.

"It's not that I don't want to...," he sighed for the umpteenth time, rubbing his eyes tiredly, "I just can't deal with them anymore. And Reg..."

"Regulus Black? Your brother, right?" I asked, having heard that name before. Apparently, he took after his brother, being the heartthrob of his year and part of the Slytherin Quidditch team albeit a Seeker.

"Yeah, my little brother," the dark-haired boy said, a smile unconsciously lifting the corner of his lips before they dropped into a bitter frown, "Of course, he is just as brainwashed as the rest of them, all thanks to our dear mother," he almost spat the last word and I winced at the hatred in his tone. At this point, it almost sounded like he was talking to himself, barely realising the other presence in his proximity. "I wish he would have just come with me," he mumbled, a vulnerable look on his face.

"You could still try to be close to him," I offered a weak suggestion, which he immediately dismissed with a scoff/hiccup. "Yeah, right. As if he would listen to me after I ran away. He won't even look my way anymore."

"But-"

"Don't think I haven't tried. He even said we weren't brothers right when I left." I frowned at the crack in his voice, my heart squeezing slightly at the pain in his eyes. Who would have known how much he suffered under all that loud and playful facade of his.

"Maybe he was just mad that you were leaving him behind," I pondered softly, racking my brain about how to make him feel better, "Sometimes we say things in the heat of the moment that we don't really mean." Sirius kept quiet, pensively watching the flames as he refused to make eye contact. I looked away from him, figuring he wouldn't like eyes on him at his vulnerable state, "I think, you two could still be close despite all the differences."

"...You really think so?"

"Yeah, one of you just has to make the first move."

"How do I know he won't reject me?" he asked like a small child, the armchair he sat on suddenly looking too big for him.

I thought it over. The possibility of rejection was definitely there, I wouldn't lie to him about it. After all I knew nothing about his brother's personality. "You don't," I responded, "But the world is full of lonely people waiting for the other to make the first move. And so many bonds get lost because of it. Don't you think that's sad?" His grey eyes snapped over to mine for the first time we had started this serious talk, surprise flickering through them before they were set into something akin to determination.

Before he could open his mouth to say anything though, James came bustling through the portrait hole, his arms packed with various snacks as he giggled like a fool. "Dig in, guys!" he cheered, dropping everything on the coffee table and just like that the serious mood was broken.

I watched Sirius pick up some cookies, munching on them as he chatted up a storm with James about the upcoming Quidditch match. By now, I knew it had been mostly the alcohol that made him spill everything. I just hoped he wouldn't feel too awkward about it the next morning.

The game against Slytherin had packed a punch. The Hufflepuffs' Bludgers were nothing against their aggressive tactics.

Let's just say no player got out there unscathed and the Snitch got caught by Regulus Black - the Slytherin Seeker - just before Angie managed to get a goal that would have gotten us a win if it had only been a few seconds earlier.

I rubbed my sore side where a Bludger had hit me at the beginning of the game as we went inside the locker room, the Slytherins celebrating on the field and laughing at our backs.

"Worst game ever," Frank, who was trudging next to me, muttered and I nodded wordlessly, my eyes watching the stiff back of our Captain as he led us into the little hut.

"This game was pathetic!" James hissed as soon as the door closed to our locker room, "Nothing worked the way we have practiced. Sirius, Frank where the hell were you two when they rained the Bludgers down the Chasers?"

"I-" Sirius started but James continued, still heated, "Oliver? You're the Keeper, right? You are supposed to keep the Quaffles out of the hoops and not hit them through!"

"I didn'-"

"And Angie? Were you even on the field? I couldn't bloody see you once near the opposite hoops."

"James, I was trying everything," Angie protested next to me, "The Slytherin Chasers w-"

"Don't even try any excuses on me," James spat agitated, "I know you want to quit after break but the way you play makes me think you want me to kick you out right now."

"James," I spoke up astonished as Angie sat back with a pissed off look. I knew he could get angry from past experiences during matches but that was straight out rude. "Calm down, we all tried our best."

"Tried your best?" the boy hissed, and I resisted the urge to tell him he sounded like a snake. No, that would probably make him madder, "If that's your best you can say bye-bye to your dreams of becoming a professional Chaser, Cecily. Not even the Montrose Magpies would want you!"

My eyes widened in surprise, his words cutting a knife through my chest.

"James," Sirius started this time, his gaze actually serious for once as I deflated into my seat, feeling more hurt than I had expected, "It's enough now."

The Captain sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose to calm himself. "Fine. Get dressed, we will talk about this at practice next week. Whoever needs to go to the Hospital Wing, stay back. We will go together."

I jumped out of my seat as soon as he dismissed us, rushing towards the girls' room to take a shower and change, his words repeating in my head like a mantra.

"Don't take him seriously," Angie soothed, interrupting the silence around us, "He always gets pissy when we lose a game."

"I know," I said with a sigh, wincing when I touched my side. Angie grimaced at the already bruising spot, "You should get that checked by Madam Pomfrey."

Nodding in agreement, we walked out together.

"Don't you wanna wait for the others?" Angie asked as I kept walking. "No, let's just go," I said over my shoulder, forcing her to concede when I didn't stop.

"Ms. Grant," Poppy greeted me, "It's been a while. I hope you realise, neither the sweets nor Mr. Potter have changed my mind, no matter how persuasive the Pixie Puffs can be."

"It's not that," I replied, shaking my head at Angie when she gave me a questioning look, "I just need to get my side checked."

"Ah, the Quidditch match between Slytherin and Gryffindor has been today, right?" Poppy remarked, frowning at the sight of my bruise when I lifted my shirt, "Honestly, this game should be banished from school. It always gets way out of control."

"Still nothing that you can't fix," I replied, watching her shuffle through her cupboards after setting me down on one of the beds.

"What was that about Pixie Puffs and Potter?" Angie asked as we waited.

"Just me unsuccessfully trying to get an internship here at the Hospital Wing," I explained quietly as the doors of the Wing opened once more to reveal the other players trudging inside, pushing aside the few Slytherin players that tried to walk in as well. Luckily, they were in too much of a good mood to stir up a fight like they usually would, instead opting to just verbally make fun of the boys in the background.

"Didn't I tell you to wait?" James asked annoyed as he sat down on the unoccupied bed next to us.

"Yes, and I didn't," I snapped back, pissed off at both him and the pain in my side. James opened his mouth, but Sirius clasped his hand on his shoulder, shaking his head. Shooting the grey-eyed boy a grateful look I turned around as Poppy came back, gesturing for me to lift my shirt. I obeyed, hissing as she applied some balm on the bruise but sighing immediately in relief as the pain diminished into a dull ache. "Apply this once more tonight and it should all be well by tomorrow," the matron instructed as she handed me the tube and I thanked her with a quick smile before I hopped off to leave. Bidding the others goodbye, I ignored James' lingering look, particularly at my bruised side, and left to have a quick dinner and head to bed.

This day had been exhausting enough.

The following days were miserable to say the least. The Slytherins were still gloating about their win, classes were hell as nothing went into my brain and on top of that I wasn't on speaking terms with James and therefore, the rest of the Marauders as well.

It wasn't like I didn't want to, but his words had left a sting more painful than the bruise on my side; Bringing up my deepest desire and throwing it back in my face was a big no-go. I almost regretted opening up to him like that and the more days passed with him not talking to me the more I wished I hadn't ever walked up to the Quidditch pitch for that game with a little extra-confident swagger in my steps.

I also wished I didn't have to attend the regular Quidditch practices; James was more commanding than usual, which led us to double laps and longer simulated games until it was pitch black outside. The only bright side was that at least Sirius tried to cheer us all up and even occasionally chatted with me in-between breaks.

"I think something is wrong with Peanut," I mused, adjusting my grip.

"Something is wrong with what?" Sirius asked perplexed.

"Peanut," I repeated, gesturing towards my broom. The dark-haired boy stared at me. "You...named your broomstick Peanut?" he asked slowly, uncomprehending.

"Yeah, why?"

"Just- no matter," he dismissed quickly, his lips twitching in amusement, "Why don't you tell James that something is wrong with Peanut? He can fix it."

Raising a brow, I stated, "First of, Peanut is a splendid name for a broomstick." I rolled my eyes as he burst out into small barks of laughter. "Secondly, I'm not on speaking terms with our dear Captain right now and you know that."

"Yes, I do." It was his turn to roll his eyes. "And I still think it's ridiculous."

"It's not! He mocked me!" I protested.

"Yeah, but weren't you the one, who told me that people say things they don't mean in the heat of the moment?"

I narrowed my eyes at him, "I don't appreciate you using my words against me!"

Sirius grinned before he turned sirius again, "He was angry, and I can safely say that he did not mean a single thing he's said back then."

"And why isn't he talking to me then? He hasn't even apologised!"

"Because he is also proud ass. Or rather, he doesn't know how to approach you," Sirius snickered and my eyes widened in surprise.

"He doesn't know how to approach me?"

"Yeah, he thinks you are angry at him-" "Which I am!" "-and he is still trying to figure out how to apologise." I stayed quiet, watching the subject of our conversation fly around the field, giving instructions to each player. "If you let it up to him, I would say he will work up his courage by the end of the year. At the earliest."

Later that evening, I decided to stay up after dinner. The others went to bed quickly whilst I sat on my bed with my broom on my lap, contemplating whether I should go down or not. I didn't even know if James still waited at the fireplace as I hadn't been there the past few days but figured it couldn't hurt to try.

Putting my robe over the sleeping clothes, I softly padded outside, carefully taking a peek around the corner into the Common Room after walking down the hallway. The space was empty except for one lonely person lounging on the loveseat in front of the warm fire, the sight achingly familiar.

Swallowing nervously, I gripped my broomstick tighter as I headed down the stairs with purposefully loud steps (as far as possible with socks on). His glass-rimmed eyes snapped over, widening, and he immediately sat up when I approached him.

"Hey James," I greeted him awkwardly, holding my broom in front of me with both hands, almost as a form of protection.

"Hey Cec," he breathed out as if in relief, his eyes rapidly flickering from me to the broom and back to me.

"Um-"

"Come sit," he offered quickly, patting the seat next to him and I obliged, relaxing and simultaneously feeling nervous at the proximity, "Why do you have Peanut with you?"

"Oh, right. Ehm, I think something is wrong with it," I explained, handing it over at his request, "It's not turning as smoothly as it used to."

"Hm, 'might have gotten tweaked during the last game," James mused, brows furrowed in concentration as he examined every inch, "It got hit by a lot of Bludgers, didn't it? Bloody Slytherins. But nothing I can't fix."

"Yeah, I figured that was the cause," I nodded in agreement and his eyes flickered over to me, the fire giving his irises a honey-coloured tone. "What about you?" he asked softly, "Is your side doing better?"

"Perfectly healed, thanks," I informed him, melting slightly on the inside at his concern, "You know Poppy." He cracked a grin at the nickname (causing my heart to miss a beat) before looking back down at the broom, his gaze turning serious.

"Cecily, I...wanted to- you know- I kind of said some messed up things after the game," he stammered slightly, fiddling with the broomstick nervously. My features relaxed at his nervous state and I allowed a small smile as he continued, "I really shouldn't have said what I said- you know the thing with the Montrose Magpies and you- and everything else I said to the others, I didn't mean any of it and I will never do it again, I solemnly swear! I guess, what I'm trying to say- and what I've been trying to say the past few days, but I didn't know how- well first, I figured I should probably give you some space since I never do that with Evans and she always gets madder and madder, but-"

"James," I cut him off and he immediately shut his mouth, "It's alright."

His brown eyes widened, "Really?"

"Yeah, I get it. It's okay."

"You are not mad anymore?" he asked tentatively, staring incredulously as I shook my head, "It's that easy?"

"Well, it can be," I replied with a grin before sighing, "I just don't wanna be mad anymore." And I missed his presence. But hush.

James also sighed, in relief as he leaned back. "Good, I don't think I could have waited any longer."

"Waited? For what?"

"Asking you out, of course."

This time, I really choked on my spit.

Chapter Six

#James Potter #james potter x oc #james potter x reader #james potter imagine #james potter fanfiction #marauders imagine #sirius black #remus lupin #Lily Evans #marauders era #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #harry potter imagine #marlene mckinnon #Marauders

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imaginejamesandsirius · 3 years

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Hi. Thank you for your wonderful works, they always make my day! I would like to request a story featuring pregnant Sirius and James not reacting positively at first. Perhaps even some nice Sirius&Lily friendship with Sirius crying on Lily's shoulder and Lily later setting James straight. Thank you. Hankycka

((A/N: Nothing explicit, but there are mentions to issues conceiving, just in case that bothers anyone))

"I'm pregnant," Sirius said, smiling.

"Oh no," James said.

Sirius's smile was gone in an instant. "What?"

"No, I didn't mean- it's- oh bugger."

He blinked at James. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know," James said miserably, covering his face with his hands.

"Great," Sirius said flatly, his good mood leaving in a rush like air being let out of a balloon. "I'm so happy to see that you're overwhelmed with joy. I'll just go share the good news."

He didn't know what he was going to do or where he was going to go, but he ignored James calling his name and left, then found himself on Lily's doorstep and figured why not? Lily probably wouldn't react the same way that James had, and he could use someone being nice to him right now. He knocked on the door and waited anxiously for it to open. It was times like this that he was glad they lived in the same neighbourhood, because otherwise he would've walked around the block, then gone back home and asked James if he was over it yet.

Lily answered the door a minute later. "Sirius, hi. Come on in," she said, holding the door wider to make room for him. "I wasn't expecting you. Did I forget that we have plans? And do you want a cuppa?"

"No, no plans, but some herbal tea would be nice, if you've got it," he said, pulling off his shoes and following Lily to the kitchen. "Do you have a minute or are you busy?"

"I've always got time for you. Besides, Remus is at his doctor, so I could use a distraction while I wait to hear from him. What's up?"

"I'm pregnant."

Lily beamed, turning to face him with the kettle still in her hands. "That's great! I bet James was over the moon. Erm, wasn't he?" she added upon seeing his downtrodden expression.

"Not so much."

"Well what did he say?"

"'Oh no' and 'bugger'."

Lily blinked. "Please tell me you're joking."

Sirius shook his head. Saying it aloud to someone else didn't make him feel any better about it. In fact, it made him feel worse. James-- as Lily said-- should've been over the moon. There had been a few years where they thought that they'd have to try and adopt before learning that Sirius was still fertile and could carry naturally (though it might take some time with his medical complications). It should've been the best news ever, or at the very least, good news. "I thought he'd be happy, but he acted like it was the end of his bloody life. I just- I know that it wasn't smart or healthy or whatever the fuck, but I walked out and... wound up here. I wanted him to be ecstatic about this; I was when I found out, and it lasted all morning until he-" Sirius broke off with a frustrated sigh. "I know that it's big news, but I thought it was happy big news. I was expecting some disbelief, yeah, because we've only been trying for a couple months and Doctor Prewett told us it might take years, but I never thought he'd be upset about it. I don't really know what to do when James is upset with me. He usually isn't, so I've never had to learn how to deal with it. I mean," he amended a second later, "little fights over where I put the remote and whose turn it is to clean the loo, but nothing like this."

Lily put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. She finished filling up the kettle and put it on the stove. "I'm going to make a call, but it shouldn't take long. I'll be right back, okay?"

"Okay," Sirius said, and he was so dejected that he didn't find it strange she suddenly had to call someone.

She went to her room and closed the door, dialling James's number.

"Hello?"

"Hi James, it's Lily. I thought you might want to know that Sirius is over at my house."

He breathed out a sigh of relief. "Thanks. I'm sure you're not my biggest fan right now, but thank you for calling. He didn't take his phone or his keys, and I didn't know if he was going to come back or- thanks, Lily. Is he okay?"

"Honestly? No. What were you thinking? I thought you wanted to have a baby."

"I do, and we do, but I've got news of my own that doesn't make the timing great."

"Okay," Lily said slowly. "I want to be understanding and respect the fact that this is your relationship and everything, but maybe you should've said that to Sirius instead of 'oh no'? Just- look, obviously I don't know the specifics of your relationship, and I don't like to stick my nose in your business because we made that deal our last year of Hogwarts that if I kept out of your relationship, you'd stay out of mine, but he's really sad. Like, ridiculously sad. He doesn't know what's going on, and he thinks you're mad at him or summat. So please, come over and apologise or say that you'll explain or whatever it is you need to do. Because it's kind of a prick move to make a pregnant person this sad."

"I know; I panicked. I'll be right over. Can you tell him I'm on my way? Or hand him the phone so I can tell him?"

"I'll tell him. And James? Thanks."

"No problem, Evans. I know you're a disaster when people start crying."

Lily snorted but didn't argue-- mostly because it was true. She hung up and tucked her phone back in her pocket as she walked back to the kitchen. She meant to tell Sirius that James was on his way, but she froze when she saw that he'd started crying. "Erm." She was having a bit of an 'oh no' moment herself. She wasn't good when people were crying, but she also wasn't going to just leave Sirius like this. She walked over and gave him a hug. "It's okay."

Sirius sniffled and didn't say anything. He hugged her back, so she figured she should get comfortable as they waited for James to arrive.

It didn't take long, and he didn't bother to knock on the door. For once, it didn't annoy Lily that he walked right in. Sirius wiped at his face when he heard footsteps, and he glared when he saw that it was James. "What're you doing here?" he asked, and Lily shot James an apologetic look that hopefully conveyed she hadn't had the opportunity to tell Sirius that he was coming over.

"Well, you're my husband, and you sort of ran out before I could explain."

"What's to explain? I'm pregnant and you're mad about it."

"Can we go home and talk?" James asked, which was good; Lily had already been present for more of this conversation than she wanted.

"No," Sirius muttered petulantly.

James glanced at Lily. "I know it's your house, and I'm sorry, but do you think you could give us a minute?"

"Sure. I'll just erm-" she jerked a thumb over her shoulder "-be in the spare room." She'd be able to find something to do there until they were done. And if she couldn't, she'd be able to sit and wait just as well in the spare room as she could in front of the telly.

James walked over and sat in a chair next to Sirius. "I'm sorry I reacted like that," he said quietly.

"Why did you?" Sirius asked, looking over at him with betrayal written all over his face. "We were trying to get pregnant, and now that it's happened you're having second thoughts? It's a little late for that."

"No," James said immediately. "Not second thoughts, nothing like that, love. It's just that the timing's kind of- well, rubbish. Moody announced the team for the new project over in the States."

He blinked at his husband, eyes wide. James didn't have to say that he was on the team for Sirius to know that's what had happened.

"It got announced today, and I was trying to think of how to tell you. I thought we might put off trying to have a baby for the next year so that I would be able to move back home, and-" his breath caught and he didn't bother trying to finish his sentence. "I don't know what to do. I can turn down the assignment, but it would set back my career; this is supposed to be a golden opportunity. If I turn it down, there won't be another chance like this for years. Although," James said with a sigh, "maybe it's worth considering. There's no point in working on advancing if I'm going to be taking care of a baby two years from now. And back when we first started talking about kids, I promised you that I'd be there for you for all of it. My point is, we need to talk about this. I don't want to make a decision without thinking it through, and I'm sorry about not telling you how happy I am." He started to smile, and when he reached for Sirius's hand, Sirius turned to twine their fingers together. "I mean, bloody hell Sirius, a baby? We've been dreaming about that for years. Of course I'm happy. I'm just worried. And- yeah, a little upset that these two great things are happening at the same time which means I won't get to enjoy one of them as much as I was hoping."

"Yeah," Sirius said, because he one hundred percent understood what James meant. "We can- I dunno. Eat, sleep on it. Talk more." With his free hand, he wiped at his nose. It itched, but there was nothing he could do about that here. "Ah bugger, I did sort of take over Lily's day, didn't I?" He retracted his hand from James's and got to his feet, feeling embarrassed that he'd burst into tears at Lily and Remus's house. And that he'd run away from James. Gods, what had he been thinking? He'd been upset, yes, but if he wanted some space, he could've just gone to their room. Or to the backyard. Hindsight was twenty-twenty.

"I'm sure she'll forgive us," James said, pulling him into a quick hug. He pressed a kiss to the side of Sirius's head. "I love you so much, you know that?"

"I know."

"And I'm so sorry I didn't tell you what was going on right away."

"You did try, in your defense," Sirius mumbled.

"Well I should've been quicker about it." He kissed Sirius's head again, then stepped away. "I'll go tell Lily we're leaving."

#prongsfoot #marauders #sirius black #james potter #lily evans #fanfic #background lily evans/remus lupin #no magic au #established relationship #married #post hogwarts #siriuslystarbucks #mpreg

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bothcreativitybois · 3 years

Text

The Mayor’s Sweet Treat Chapter 3

Wordcount: 2955

Ship: Intruality

TWs: Food, horses, dogs, skipping meals, a little bit of past angst, sexual references, swearing

Taglist: @star-crossed-shipper @crazydemigod666 @idont-freaking-know @someoneiwasnt @seraphiie @the-sympathetic-villain @cute-and-angsty-princess @lonelymuffin

Remus flung out of the truck and smashed on the bakery door.

“Wakey wakey!” Remus shouted at the doors. Above him a window opened. Patton smiled down radiantly. The cold night breeze rustled his hair dreamily while Remus’ long locks thrash slightly.

Remus you dumbass! He isn’t used to this!

“You’re an impatient one, Mr Grinch.” Patton joked.

“Actually it’s Mr Manzana.” Remus shouted back. “Are you coming down or not?” Patton giggled and closed the window. A few seconds later he appeared beside the building.

“So where are we going?” Patton asked as Remus walked up to him. Remus laughed.

“The best place in town, which is conveniently also the only place.” Remus joked. Patton followed him down the street to a little restaurant with a yellow sign. Remus opened the door for Patton as they entered the small restaurant. There were a handful of tables set up with only one in use. Remus walked over to greet the small family at the table. Patton followed awkwardly.

“Remus!” A gruff father looking figure shouted and pat Remus on the back. “Good ta see ya.” Also at the table were two small children and an elderly lady.

“How are you doing, sweetheart?” The elderly lady chimed in. Remus smiled widely while Patton just sort of shrank behind him.

“Staying out of trouble as much as possible.” Remus chuckled, both the adults laughed.

“Which for you isn’t possible.” The man laughed heartily. Remus smiled and put a hand on his shoulder.

“Clyde, let me introduce you to Patton.” Remus held a hand out as to present Patton. The man looked at him happily.

“Great to meet ya.” Clyde stood up and enveloped Patton’s hand in a strong handshake.

“You too.” Patton said meekly. The large man laughed.

“Don’t worry, I don’t bite.” Clyde joked. “Remus however…” He elbowed Remus who pulled a fake innocent face.

“These darling angels are Taylor and June.” Remus ruffled the hair of the two children who both tried to push his hand away. “And this is Ms Cath. She taught me when I was the kids' sizes.” The elderly lady stood up and hugged Patton. The hug was soothing, it reminded him of his mother. He thought about how long it’s been since he was hugged… a couple months?

“Welcome to our little town, honey.” Ms Cath soothed. “Well let you two get back to it. But if you ever need anything then just stop by the school and see me.” The old lady winked. Remus put a hand on Patton’s back and after a few more words with the family guided Patton to their own table. Patton looked around the restaurant. Not in a nervous way, just the way you do when you enter a new place. The people he’d just met were chatting happily and enjoying their food. Remus snapped his fingers to get Patton’s attention.

“Hey so the waiter is a friend of mine and he has some unique features. Don’t to stare, it upsets him.” Remus whispered. Patton nodded politely just as the waiter in question showed up.

“So this is the baker I heard about?” The waiter said. Patton looked up to see a little name tag reading ‘Janus’. The man had a large black birthmark and a lazy eye. He figured that’s what Remus meant.

“I like your hair.” Patton smiled. Janus touched the small bun his dreads were pulled back in. His face was surprised.

“Thanks.” He turned to Remus. “You getting what you always get?” Remus laughed.

“Don’t fix what ain’t broke.” Remus confirmed with a wide smile. “And an extra for my friend here.” Janus nodded and scribbled something down on his notepad.

“Great. I’ll be off work at midnight so if you plan on taking ‘your friend’ home then please be done by then.” Janus said calmly and walked away. Patton blushed but Remus simply laughed. He looked down at Patton, he realised how uncomfortable he looked.

He reached across the table and grabbed Patton’s hand. He noticed a small tattoo on Patton’s wrist he hadn’t seen before, a little frog.

“Sorry, I kinda threw you in the deep end there.” Remus apologised. “Janus was just joking around, he’s really nice albeit a little dry and blunt.” Remus attempted to reassure Patton, it seemed to work as he released the tension in his shoulders a bit and nodded. Remus pulled his hand away.

“Everyone here seems really nice.” Patton said. Remus smiled and looked around.

“It’s that small town spirit.” Remus replied. “When everyone knows everyone no one is really mean… well except for some of the older families who have weird rivalries but that’s a story for another day.” Remus was so calm, it was weird. Usually he was bouncing off the walls by now but something about Patton was keeping him on the ground.

“Tell me about growing up here?” Patton asked. Remus took a deep breath. There were thousands of stories racing around his head and he needed to find a way to summarise them all.

“It’s chaotic but somehow also predictable.” He eventually answered. “From the outside it’s like a horse rolling around on it’s back. It looks ridiculous but it knows exactly what it’s doing.” Patton was amused by the analogy. He understood that Remus was a country kid but now he was just being cliché. Not to mention Patton knew next to nothing about horses.

“And what does it mean when a horse rolls around?” Patton asked, genuinely curious about the silly behaviour of horses. Remus’ face lit up.

“Most the time it means they got colic and are trying to dislodge whatever got stuck. But if it’s a younger philly they could just be having fun. Colic isn’t serious though, usually it’s solved just by leading it for a walk or a shot of penicillin.” Remus explained. Patton watched how Remus’ eyes sparkled as he talked, he seemed a lot more in his element. “Colic is what keeps the vets round here in business. Pretty much everyone has a horse and the farms all have at least three. I got one still livin’ at my parents place, I’ve been meaning to move her to mine but she’s scared to death of trailers and I don’t have the ti-” Remus was cut off by a groan from Janus who had appeared with two plates.

“Kraken is fine on the farm, they have good use for her.” Janus began. “If we brought her to our place she’d be stuck in a paddock all day and only get ridden every week or so.” Janus placed down the plates with two tall burgers. “Two lamb burgers, one with extra pickle and barbeque sauce.” Janus pulled a face as he announced the last part.

“Thanks.” Patton smiled happily. Janus nodded and walked away. Patton looked over at Remus who was taking pickles off his burger and putting them on a napkin. “Why did you order extra pickles if you aren’t eating them?” Patton was confused. Remus looked up and smiled devilishly. He liked pickles, but always ordered extra for something special.

“You’ll see.” Remus winked as he wrapped up the pickles and put them in his pocket.

The two men didn’t talk much as they ate. Remus was used to being the kind to devour food quickly while everyone else told him to slow down, so he was surprised when he saw Patton finished his burger first. Patton was just happy to be eating real food again.

“You finished that fast.” Remus said as he took the last bite of his burger. Patton looked up and blushed. Truthfully it was the first thing he’d eaten today, he had skipped breakfast and was too stressed to eat while working. Patton laughed awkwardly. Remus reeled, he meant it as a compliment but was worried Patton didn’t take it that way. “I mean that in a good way, pancake. It’s hard to find people who can keep up with me.” Remus quickly added. Patton giggled. Remus stood to leave but Patton stopped him.

“Wait! We need to pay.” Patton fretted. Remus looked over Patton and winked at Janus, he sighed and waved them away. Patton watched the weird exchange and didn’t notice Remus grab his hand to pull him out of the restaurant. He was tugged out so fast he nearly fell down but he couldn’t help but laugh. Remus pulled him down the dark street as they both cackled.

“Where are we going?” Patton asked through the laughs. Remus looked back and flashed a brilliantly evil smile.

“You wanted a tour, didn’t you?” Remus said as he halted to a stop. Patton nearly ran right into him if it wasn’t for Remus’ outstretched arm. “Here is where we start!” Remus pointed to the building in front of them. A brick building with a clock above the door.

“Mindville Council Hall?” Patton read from the sign next to him. Remus shook his head and shook his pointed hand. Patton followed the line of sight to, “The… clock?” Remus nodded excitedly so fast he looked like he might burst. He reached into his pocket and took out the napkin from the restaurant.

“The clock hasn’t worked in years.” Remus said as he took a pickle from the napkin, he handed the rest to Patton. “This is a way better use for it anyway.” With that Remus hucked the pickle slice into the air towards the clock, it hit the glass cover with a barely audible splat. Remus would come here as a kid and throw all sorts of things, but he found out quickly that pickles were not only the most accessible but also stuck the best. Remus celebrated with a loud cheer and took the pickles from Patton. “Give it a try.” Patton gently took a pickle and looked up at the clock. It was at least ten meters up.

“I’m not sure I can get it…” Patton conceded. Remus took a pickle slice and laughed.

“Who cares?” Remus shouted as he threw another pickle, this one hitting above the first. Patton took a deep breath and pulled back his hand. He closed his hand and threw the pickle as hard as he could. He looked up in time to see it land just short of the clock. He blushed in embarrassment but to his surprise Remus hollered.

“Whooo!” Remus cheered. His whoops were brash and loud, like when the electric mixer hit the edge of the metal bowl. “That’s a great shot!” Patton smiled at the enthusiasm and grabbed another slice. Remus did too and they both threw them together. Remus hit the 4 while Patton’s was just shy of the clock again. Suddenly the lights of the building turned on around them. “On to the next place!” Remus threw the napkin with the rest of the slices and began bolting down the road, Patton stood shocked for a second then followed.

“Aren’t you the mayor?” Patton huffed as they ran. Remus was surprisingly fast and he had trouble keeping up.

“Yes, and?” Remus said, barely breaking a sweat. When they were far enough away Remus slowed down and started pointing out the shops they walked past. “That is the butcher, if you ask nicely they’ll give you bones that aren’t big enough to sell as dog bones. That’s Salamanders Silk, one of the 7 places I’ve gotten a cut that needs stitching which is ironic given it’s a clothes store.” Something told Patton this tour wouldn’t be overly informative of the actual places. “And this is the bakery that makes amazing muffins.” Remus stopped. Patton realised they were in front of his shop. He looked up at the bare walls of the building, it looked abandoned. Every shop in town had nice signs and lovely paint but his just looked sad.

“How about I give you a tour?” Patton chimed in happily. Remus looked down and nodded excitedly. Patton walked up and unlocked the door. “Welcome to Froggy and Doggy Bakery.” Patton sang happily.

“Finally, I get a name.” Remus joked. Patton sighed and looked up at the empty space where a sign should hang.

“Yeah I need to get on to the sign company again.” He said sadly. Remus took a mental note of Patton’s qualms.

“How’d you get the name? Is doggy your favourite position or something?” Remus asked as he walked in. Patton locked the door behind them and flipped on the lights.

“Actually it’s based on a story my mother told me as a kid.” Patton started. Remus regretted his previous statement. “There was a princess who had two suitors, a prince and a farmer. She asked each to bring her an animal as a gift. The prince brought her a well bred dog with beautiful hair. The farmer brought her a small green frog. She took each pet and announced she would be marrying the farmer. The prince got mad and demanded her to answer why. She said that anyone can go out and buy a dog, but the farmer had spent time catching the frog and cleaning it to present to her. Even though his gift wasn’t the most pretty or conventional, it had the most effort and thought put in it.” Patton smiled as he told the story, Remus was entrapped by his words. He clearly had fond memories of that story and it was reflected in how happily he told it.

“I think that’s my new favourite fairy tale.” Remus said when Patton finished talking. “Is that why you have that tattoo as well?” Remus gestured to Patton’s wrist. He nodded.

“My ex was a tattoo artist and he did it as a birthday gift.” Patton said as he rubbed a thumb over the small frog drawn on his wrist. It took him a moment to realise he had just come out to a man he’d met only earlier today. He looked up expecting some sort of reaction from Remus, but he didn’t care. Remus was just looking around the bakery, closely inspecting a sign on one of the walls. Patton found it refreshing to have someone not have a big reaction.

“Art gallery? What’s this for?” Remus asked. The wall had no art on it, just a few small shelves. Patton walked over to join him.

“Oh my mother had the idea that artists could put up any art they had to sell here for a small fee. That way we could generate more business while helping people.” Patton informed. “That reminds me, is there a homeless shelter I could donate any unsold items to?” Remus was surprised. Patton had never been here and already wanted to help the people. It was admirable.

“Well there aren’t any homeless shelters here because there isn’t a need for them, but there is one in the city as you probably know. It’s an hour drive but they’d probably be very happy with a donation even once a week.” Remus explained. Patton looked back blankly.

“Why would I know that?” Patton asked.

“You lived there before you moved here, didn’t you?” Remus thought it was obvious. The only people who knew about this town were the people living in it and some of the people in surrounding areas.

“No. I lived on the coast.” Patton said.

That’s in the very least 3 hours away. Remus thought.

“Why’d you move here then?” Remus asked plainly, not knowing that for Patton it was a loaded question. Patton crossed his arms and looked down. Remus noticed. “Oh- uh- you don’t have to answer.” He stammered quickly trying to comfort Patton. He was curious but didn’t want to make Patton uncomfortable.

“Thanks.” Patton whispered. It hurt to think back to the time before he moved. It hurt to remember how he pretended to be happy so much that he even fooled himself. He shook his head to get rid of the thoughts and smiled at Remus. “How about some dessert?” Patton chirped. He really bounced back quickly. Remus wasn’t sure if Patton was serious or flirting so he just nodded his head. Patton clapped and made a happy noise. He led Remus up the stairs to his apartment and unlocked the door, the whole time Remus becoming more and more confused what this invitation entailed.Patton opened the door and allowed Remus to enter. He entered the small studio apartment with an impressive kitchen. Remus didn’t know how to play this. Did Patton think this was a date? Even so he was so sweet and kind that Remus didn’t pin him as the kind to give it up on the first date. Remus tentatively walked over and sat on the large bed. Patton looked across the room where Remus had taken a seat on his bed. It suddenly hit him how his offer may have sounded. Thoughts crashed against Patton’s mind. He quickly walked over and opened the fridge. Patton pulled out a few small caramel tartlets and brought them over to Remus. “Ta da!” Patton announced.

Oh of course. Remus thought. Of course Patton meant actual dessert. He’s a fucking baker.

Patton once again was alone but this time he was a lot happier.

“They look great.” Remus said as he admired the lovely caramel tarts with chocolate shavings.

“Take them. As a thank you for tonight.” Patton pressed the plate into Remus’ arms. Remus took the plate and tried one of the tarts. The rich caramel melted in his mouth and blended perfectly with the buttery shortbread crust. “And tell Janus I said thanks too.”

“He’ll love these.” Remus mumbled, shoving another in his mouth. Patton giggled. Remus said his goodbyes and left.

#sanders sides #the mayor's sweet treat #sanders sides small town au #sanders sides fan fiction #sanders sides fic #intruality #intruality au #patton sanders #ts patton #remus sanders #ts remus #janus sanders #ts janus #tw food #roman took over

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blacknailpolishonguitarstrings · 3 years

Text

Vintage tee..

The wind howled behind the fogged-up windows of Gryffindor Tower, hissing and rushing. The Common Room was bathed in the warm, golden, glow of slowly dying scarlet and amber flames in the fireplace, painting mystical shadows across the stone walls. The figures woven into the tapestries decorating the room sat unusually still, probably asleep already, just like the golden-maned unicorn who lay peacefully at the feet of the lady with the red rose. Silence reigned in the room, interrupted only by the crackling of the logs and the scratching of Sirius’ quill on his parchment, while minutes ticked by on the grandfather clock standing next to one of Godric Gryffindor’s many portraits, empty at current times.

“Merlin’s bollocks!” He swore all of a sudden, slamming down his quill. “Why must it always be so bloody cold here?”

“You now have a broken quill, very smart of you,” said an amused voice behind him.

Sirius gasped, startled, and knocked over his ink bottle.

“And now you also have a stained Transfiguration essay, Minnie will be delighted tomorrow morning.”

“Thank you, Remus, for always being such a wonderfully supportive friend, I don’t know what I would do without you,” muttered Sirius sarcastically.

“Oh come on, quit grumbling Pads, I swear, you do nothing else these days,” Remus continued teasing, coming up behind him.

He rested a hand on the back of the sofa where Sirius sat amidst scattered parchments and books, painfully close to his shoulder. Close enough, at least, for his heartbeat to quicken immediately, and he thanked Merlin he seldom blushed, or else, he was sure, a deep, hot, red flush would be creeping up his neck now.

“ ‘Am not,” he replied peevishly.

“You are such a child sometimes,” said Remus, swinging his long legs over the sofa and settling down next to him, folding them under him like he always did.

And again, Sirius couldn’t help but notice, he was close to him, agonizingly so.

“What has you up so late anyway?” He asked, changing the subject, attempting fruitlessly to distract himself of the way Remus’ short brown curls seemed to be threaded with gold in the firelight, and the way his usually sharp, bony features softened in the dim light.

“Couldn’t sleep, the full moon is approaching and as you already know I always feel restless on these days,” he answered lightly, but his tone held a certain snappiness, barely perceptible.

“I’m sorry, Moony,” whispered Sirius, desperately wanting to touch him, offer him some sense of comfort, but not daring to, afraid of betraying his inner feelings.

“It’s fine, I’m used to it,” he waved it off, yet a certain tension had settled in his jaw.

Quietness settled between them, not exactly uncomfortable, but still hanging awkwardly in the air, waiting to be filled with all the untold words running through their minds. Sirius stared blankly at his essay, trying to concentrate, but the words swam before his eyes, blurring and mixing, not a single piece of information staying in his busy mind. Remus just watched the dying embers very carefully, as if trying to avoid doing or saying something, while the gusts of wind kept shrieking in sporadic spurts behind the tightly shut glass panels. Somehow though, Siris still felt cold, chilled to the bone, even below his jumper. He shivered. Wordlessly, Remus looked at him briefly, an odd, dark spark flashing in his honey brown eyes speckled with green for a fraction of a second, before taking off his knitted wool cardigan and handing it to him.

“I’m not cold,” protested Sirius, trying very hard not to stare at Remus’ permanently slightly tanned skin and the silver scars crisscrossing across it, peeking from beneath his old, worn-out Pink Floyd t-shirt.

“Liar,” he replied, shoving it into his hands. “Just accept the help for once and don’t be so bloody stubborn, there’s nothing shameful about being cold, you know.”

“What about you though? Aren’t you going to freeze?”

“First of all, you’re exaggerating, it’s not freezing, it’s spring, it’s merely chilly. And second of all, no, I won’t, because I’m a werewolf and I’m always hot,” he said simply as if it were a universal truth.

“You have no fucking clue,” thought Sirius, a small ironic grin playing across his lips.

He remembered the exact day he realised he had fallen fast and hard for his best friend, that night last winter when he had appeared at the brink of death at the Potter’s. Remus had of course acted as any good friend would, but something about him struck him as different, yet he couldn’t quite place his finger upon it. In any case, the irrevocable truth of the butterflies fluttering in his stomach every time he was alone with him remained: he had a big, huge even, crush on Remus Lupin. And it was maddeningly infuriating.

With a defeated sigh, Sirius took the knitwear from Remus' warm hands, threading his fingers with the strings of dark green wool.

“It’s green,” he sneered.

“I thought this one was your favourite,” pouted Remus playfully. “You always steal it from me.”

“No, I don’t!” Exclaimed Sirius, making a falsely offended grimace.

“Yes, you do!”

“That was like...once!”

“Okay let me see: you stole it once from me when you were sick back in Third Year, then you took it that time we went hiking near the lake by the Potter’s house, you take it regularly and fall asleep in it in the Common Room, you—“

“Okay okay, I get it,” interrupted Sirius. “I’m sorry if it bothers you please tell me so.”

“No, no,” said Remus hastily. “It’s fine. You...you look...it looks good on you.”

He bashfully ran his hand through his hair, his cheeks tributes pink, and Sirius couldn’t help the rush of satisfaction that ran through his veins like electricity.

“Is that a compliment I hear? From you?”

“Oh come on Padfoot, don’t give me that look, you know you look good, you’ve got half of Hogwarts at your feet!”

“All I hear is that you find me gorgeous,” he smirked back, flipping his hair dramatically.

“Your ego is unbelievably enormous,” scoffed Remus.

“Besides, they’re not who I want…”

Oh shit, had he said that out loud?

“Really? And who are you interested in?”

Yep, he had. Bloody hell.

“That is a secret for me to know,” he replied, praying his voice did not waver and betray his inner turmoil.

“Interesting, in all the years I’ve known you no one has caught your attention for more than a few hours, she must be very special,” said Remus pensively.

Sirius wasn’t sure, but it was almost as if his voice carried a certain sadness.

“Who said it was a she, Moony?” He whispered, staring right at him, unconsciously counting every single freckle peppering his nose and cheekbones.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to make any assumptions. Well,” he added, standing up. “I think I’m gonna head back to bed, good luck with your essay Pads.”

Disappointment filled him, he had hoped Remus would stay a little longer, but he ignored it, tugging absentmindedly at the already-frayed cuffs of his friend’s cardigan, too big for him.

“Sleep well, Moony,” he mumbled, too distraught to look him in the eye.

Remus nodded and went back up the stairs.

“If only you knew it was you,” mumbled Sirius to himself, watching him go.

He never heard Remus’ barely perceptible whisper:

“You have no idea how much I wish whoever it was I, instead of whoever it is.”

#fanfic #marauders fanfiction #wolfstar #wolfstar fic #Remus Lupin #sirius black #pining #idiots in love

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j-amespotter · 3 years

Text

★ epiphany – r. l.

"with you, i serve. with you, i fall down."

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Nymphadora Tonks (if you squint)

x. x.

Summary: Throughout his life, Remus fought many battles. Only once was he ever on the brink of victory.

Genre/Warnings: angst, war, death, torture, mentions of lycanthropy

Word Count: 1.7k

A/N: i'm officially on summer break, so expect more writing from me!! this one actually took a lot of time and effort so please share your feedback. not a reader insert, just some canon character insight. i think about remus's last moments a lot :( let me know if you'd like to be added to my taglist!

masterlist

1978 - With you, I serve.

The moon was bright but not quite full. It shone on two boys, both fresh out of school and on the precipice of becoming men. As much as they tried to deny it, there was an aura of naiveté surrounding them, one that would soon deteriorate beyond their imaginations.

“Come here,” said Remus Lupin, a tall, tired boy, tugging his companion’s sleeve. “Behind the bushes.”

“It’s child’s play, this job. What’s Dumbledore playing at?”

Remus was paired up with James Potter, who was growing more and more impatient by the second. “Prongs, we are trainees. We’re lucky to have an assignment at all.”

The two friends were seated on a small hill overlooking a large, dreary house. It belonged to the Travers family, a family notoriously pureblood, notoriously Slytherin. A family most likely in league with the greatest threat to the Wizarding World in several decades—Lord Voldemort.

The severity of the situation remained unspoken between them. If caught, James and Remus would be killed within seconds. Remus silently wished he shared James’s conviction regarding the ultimate invincibility of the right cause. But there was something inside of him that would remain unconvinced for a long time.

“There’s no way Travers isn’t a Death Eater,” said James. “I say we attack. They know we’re careful. They’ll never see it coming.”

“Perhaps,” said Remus. “Although, I doubt they are unprepared. Stealth is the only path to success.”

James snorted. “Okay, Professor Moony.” Years later, the same voice on a nearly-identical face would be addressing him in the same manner, with an amount of long-faced sincerity that would destroy him. But Remus did not know that yet.

After a while, Remus broke the comfortable silence between them simply because of a lingering curiosity manifesting within him. “Do you really think we can win this?”

James turned toward him. When he spoke, Remus thought he sounded a little scandalized. “Of course I do. And even if we don’t, there isn’t a single part of me that won’t die trying.”

Remus hummed, though he could feel the hesitation brewing inside of him, the same hesitation he found himself constantly suppressing around his friends. It was not as though he didn’t share the same sentiment; that wasn’t the case at all. It felt blasphemous to let his thoughts wander at times, but he couldn’t help himself. The truth was loud and clear. Remus was fighting this war for those who wouldn't do the same for him.

Something about the setting and the shape of the moon kept him lost in his muddled thoughts. “Why did you become an Animagus?”

James looked slightly taken aback, running a hand through his hair. “You know why.”

“Indulge me.”

“Because, Remus, we care about you. We wanted to help you,” said James. “We still want to help you.”

“You have done more than enough, James.” And it was true. James Potters didn’t exist in the real world, and that was a fact that was becoming blazingly clear the longer Remus spent in it.

There was nothing more to be said after that. James only sighed, staring out with a strangely thoughtful expression. “You know something?”

“What?”

“Think I’m going to ask Lily to marry me.”

Remus swallowed. “Wow.”

“Yeah,” said James. “I haven’t told anyone.”

Remus found that hard to believe. “Not even Sirius?”

“No, not even Sirius. Just thought of it, actually. Besides, something tells me Sirius would laugh in my face.”

“I don’t think that’s true,” said Remus, though it was always hard to tell with Sirius. The idea of James getting married sounded so far-fetched, and yet, made more sense to him than anything ever had in his entire life.

“So, what do you think?”

What did he think? Honestly, he felt a twinge of envy that James had someone to propose to, that he didn’t have to think twice about it, that in all likelihood, when this war ended, James would live a long, happy, healthy life with his wife and enough children to form his own Quidditch team. “I think that you definitely should.”

James’s face broke out into a wide grin, one that made Remus feel warm inside. One that told Remus that it wasn’t actually a whim, that James had been thinking about it for weeks, and that when it came to Lily, he always seemed to turn to Remus. It was a bittersweet sentiment, but one that he had come to appreciate.

“Guess I’ll need to figure out who my best man will be,” mused James.

Remus rolled his eyes. “She hasn’t even said yes yet, Prongs.”

James harrumphed. “Of course she’ll say yes to becoming Mrs. Arrogant Toerag.” He puffed out his chest dramatically, only to lose his balance and fall forward into the bushes. “Wow, we really suck at this whole ‘stealth’ thing, don’t we?”

“Shut it, will you?” whispered Remus, though if he had known how few moments he had left to share with James, he wouldn’t have reprimanded him at all.

Suddenly, a scream coming from the direction of the house interrupted them.

“What was that?” asked James. Both boys had their wands at the ready.

“They’re torturing someone,” said Remus, suppressing a shudder. He winced at the sound of another piercing scream, one that shredded his insides with every resounding decibel.

James began to rise. “We have to go in and help them.”

Instantly, Remus grabbed his arm and pulled him down. “James, we can’t. We will blow our cover, we’re likely completely outnumbered, and we were told to call reinforcements if anything got serious. We are trainees, remember?” When James begrudgingly slunk down next to him, Remus nudged him again. “Send a Patronus to the Prewetts.”

As James retreated several yards into the woods to conjure his great silvery stag, Remus turned his attention back to the house in front of them. After hearing another scream, he was beginning to lose his nerve. We can win this, Remus chanted to himself like a sacred mantra. We can win this. We can win this. We can win this.

Three years later, wizards all over Britain would celebrate their victory over the Dark Lord. But with three dead friends and one a murderous traitor, Remus Lupin would have nothing to celebrate. And he wouldn’t for a very long time, not until he stared into a pair of startlingly green eyes in a train compartment several years later.

1998 - With you, I fall down.

His heart raced as he watched the silver dome shatter around the castle. A swarm of dark, hooded figures made their way towards them. With one hand over the photograph in his pocket, Remus thought of Teddy—his vibrant, turquoise hair, his soft coos, and the sparkly eyes that looked just like his own.

We can win this. We can win this. We can win this.

It is different now, he thought to himself, I have Harry. A son. A wife. For the first time in his life, Remus Lupin had a proper family.

We can win this. We can win this. We can win this.

He was able to see his reflection on a window. Under all the worry pooling his features, Remus saw the ghost of a smile that looked so achingly familiar— the weary but indestructible smile of a new father, the one he last saw during his final moments with James many, many years ago.

He thought of Dora, who, despite his desperate pleas, followed him to Hogwarts to fight what was beginning to feel like the end. After he righteously begged her to return to safety, she scoffed teasingly. “Honestly, Remus. You should know better.”

She was right, and there was nothing more to say. She kissed him hard before they went their separate ways for the last time. Remus weaved through crowds of warriors, gaze wandering from time to time for a glimpse of either his wife or his young protege. Any sign that Dora and Harry were alright would ease his ever-growing nerves.

We can win this. We can win this. We can win this.

He thought of a late-night in his dormitory. It was the end of his seventh year. The four Marauders were sitting on each of their four-poster beds, picturing this moment, having no idea what was to come, just the confidence that it would and that they would win.

“I think it’ll be at the Ministry,” said Sirius.

“Or Diagon Alley,” said Remus thoughtfully.

“With Dumbledore leading the charge,” added James, a note of excitement in his voice. “I’d give anything to see the end of him.”

“Me too,” grumbled Sirius, struggling to hide the bitterness lacing every word. It had only struck Remus then that Sirius would be fighting his own flesh and blood on the other side. He knew better than to mention it.

“We could die,” said Peter quietly.

“We could,” affirmed James. “But I have a good feeling about it. It’ll be our moment, lads.”

Remus had only heard of Wormtail's death from Bill, who heard it from Harry. Peter, so afraid of death, so willing to do anything to avoid it, killed by his own hand. The last of his friends to go. In his wildest dreams, Remus would have never thought that he would be the last Marauder standing. Alone.

But he wasn’t alone. Not anymore. He had Dora, Teddy, and Harry. Harry, brilliant Harry, the Boy Who Lived, the boy who, unbeknownst to him, changed Remus’s life. The boy who would carry out his father's dream. The boy who would win this for them all.

We can win this. We can win this. We can win this.

Remus heaved a tired sigh. His legs felt as though they were about to give out. Despite his unique set of skills, Remus spent more time sickly than able. Especially now, nearing the age of forty. No longer did he have the agility or stamina of his youth.

He was in the center of the fighting in the courtyard. Suddenly, Remus felt a sinking, silencing feeling inside of him. Swallowing it away, he turned around, grip on his wand accidentally loosening for the quickest second.

The man in front of him was smirking, a forthcoming light blinding any identifying features. Remus's wand slipped from his fingers.

The last thing he saw was green, consuming his vision like a swarm of Dementors closing in on him. The spell hit him squarely in the chest.

He always wondered what death would feel like, often equating it with the debilitating pain of his monthly transformations. But it wasn't like that at all. Death was like falling. An eternal, endless fall into nothingness.

Moments away from victory, Remus Lupin fell down.

Mischief Managed.

Taglist: @iwritesiriusly @sheismadness @she-seeks-magic @amourtentiaa @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @queenofblacks @duckie-dunham

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harrytpotter · 4 years

Text

RIGHT PLACE, WRONG TIME — Part VII

Plot: Y/N finds herself trapped in a time in which she doesn’t belong only to learn that maybe that was her place all along.

Pairing: James Potter x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2,7K.

Right Place, Wrong Time Masterlist.

A/N: Each chapter i write of this story leads me to believe that’ll be at least a couple more than originally planned because i keep wanting to add things to the plot lol. Anyways, hope you guys like this chapter, i’m excited with this! :)

“Thought I might find you here,” you smiled at James, who sat at the higher goalpost in the Quidditch pitch.

“Aren’t you just a show-off riding your broom upright?” He chuckled at the vision of you standing on your feet on top of a broom several metres above the floor. “Come here,” he patted the spot beside him.

“What the bloody hell is that?” You nodded at a squared piece of metal James held with his left hand as you seated next to him.

“Oh, this?” James asked as he turned the box to you whilst levelling it with his eyes and pressed a button. “That’s a Muggle camera. A Polaroid, if I remember its name correctly.”

You quirked your eyebrows when the camera started to make some noises and suddenly spilled a black square with a white frame. James laughed at your reaction as he took the piece of paper out and started to shake it furiously. The black square soon transitioned into a very still picture of you smiling dreamily at the photographer. James handed it over to you.

“Why isn’t it moving?” You frowned, analysing the picture. “Godric, I look terrible.”

“Muggle pictures don’t move. They just... stay still I guess,” he chuckled. “You look perfect and I’m keeping it,” he grabbed the picture from your hands with a smile.

Biting your lower lip amidst a smile, you pulled the camera from James’ hands and, without a warning, snapped a photo of him as well. As the camera tossed the paper out once again, you took it in your fingers and started to shake it exactly like James did. When his handsome features showed on the paper, you couldn’t help but smile at the adoring gaze he was giving you in it.

“And I’m definitely keeping it,” you held the picture in his direction so he could see it.

“I look like an idiot!” He protested with a laugh.

“You look cute!” You argued, smiling.

He stared at you with the same gaze the picture you held had eternalized.

“Where did you get it anyway?” You asked after a while, handing the camera back to him.

“With me, of course!” Sirius’ voice reached your ears.

Turning your head to your right, you smiled at the sight of the raven-haired boy with stormy grey eyes. “Owning a muggle camera, Sirius Black? If only mommy dearest could see you now,” you teased, laughing.

“I’d say I’d get disowned, but bugger me, that already happened,” he shrugged with a loud laugh, flying on his broom until he was in front of you and James.

“It’s nice to see you smiling again and making jokes about your misfortunes,” you smiled dearly at your friend.

“Like you once told me, I’m much more than my twisted family,” Sirius smiled back at you. “Thank you.”

You, Sirius and James smiled warmly at each other for a few seconds before the grey-eyed boy pulled the camera from James’ hands and got ready to snap a photo of the two of you, “strike a pose, lovebirds!”

James quickly got a hold of your waist and brought you closer to him, planting a kiss on your cheek. Tangling your legs with his, you wrapped your arms around his neck and smiled playfully.

“Aren’t you such a cute couple?” He winged his brows, showing the picture to you and James.

“Aren’t you such a tosser?” You rolled your eyes at him, pulling it out of his hand. “And that’s mine.”

“That I am! But you know what I’m not?” He mischievously lifted a brow at you.

“I’m positive I’m going to regret asking, but… what?” You crossed your arms defiantly.

“A bloody coward who are afraid to own up to their feelings!” He shouted amidst a hearty laugh, speeding off in his broom.

“Oh you did not just call me a coward, Sirius Black!” You cried out, hopping on your broom and flying after him.

You could hear James’ laugh behind as he followed your trail whilst you cut through the air in high speed, chasing your other best friend. The three of you looked like little kids, flying across the corridors of Hogwarts, laughing, cursing and teasing each other, completely ignoring the fact that neither of you should be out of bed by this time.

After a few rounds, Sirius got a little advantage on you and James and got off his broom, ditching it recklessly inside the nearest broom closet and starting to run on foot. He ran for about five minutes before stopping to catch his breath and hiding behind a statue. Sirius shut his eyes down as he tried to stead his breathing and suppress the laughter that threatened to burst from his lungs.

“Where the bloody hell is this damned dog?” You hissed at James, trying not to alert Sirius of your presence as you hopped off your broom yourself, a little further from the bloom closet.

Landing right beside you, James took his index finger to his lips and grabbed you by the hand, pointing his head to a shadow with a curly long hair standing a few meters ahead of you. Exchanging mischievous grins, both you and James started to tiptoe in its direction, ever so silently. Once the boy entered your visual field, you realised he had his eyes shut and, looking at James, you bit your lower lip devilishly. The messy-haired boy nodded at you with a lopsided grin as the two of you cautiously got even closer to Sirius, ready to startle the living hell out of him.

However, before you could scare him away, the loud sound of footsteps and an incomprehensible nagging approaching your location startled the three of you. Sirius widened his eyes and James pushed you behind the statue, before getting into hiding himself.

“You do realise this space is quite small for the three of us, don’t you?” Sirius shot you and James a glare.

“At least we’ll go down together, Pad,” you wiggled your brows sarcastically. “Unless you’re a bloody coward who’d much rather throw your own friends under the bus to save yourself.”

“Like I said, love, you’re the only coward among us,” he smirked gleefully.

“Aren’t you just asking to be hexed, Black?” You smiled wryly at him, wand in hand.

“Please, go ahead; I’d love to see that!” Remus joked as his head popped behind Sirius. “What are you three idiots doing behind this statue anyway?”

“We just heard footsteps and-,” James started to talk but suddenly stopped as he realised something. “That was you, wasn’t it?”

“Guilty,” Remus shrugged playfully. “When I woke up and didn’t find you in your beds I figured you’d be doing something stupid, so I came looking for you. Then I heard your very discreet and quiet giggles and cursing and decided to follow you idiots.”

“Did you just prank us by pretending to be Filch, Moony?” You asked, astonished.

“Indeed, my dear Beastie,” he smirked satisfied.

“That was… genius!” James frowned in awe.

“You were supposed to be the nice one, you know that right?” You winged a brow at him, a lopsided grin forming on your lips. “Come on, boys, let’s head back before the actual Filch catches us.”

Taking the lead, you started to walk up the corridor, James by your side and the other two boys right behind you. The four of you were still discussing Remus’ brilliant tactic when a distant meow erupted with the wind and made you all freeze.

“That was not funny mate,” James rolled his eyes at Remus after the initial shock. “That bloody cat creeps me out.”

“It wasn’t me,” Remus frowned. “I swear!” He added at the sceptical stares.

“Well, in that case…” Sirius rested his left hand on Remus’ shoulder. “RUN!”

You, James, Sirius and Remus held hands as you lot desperately ran in the opposite direction of Mrs Norris’ meows. You passed through the halls heading to the Gryffindor Tower like a blur, laughing and slipping, chests pounding and adrenaline cursing through your veins.

“I- I think- I’m going- to faint,” Sirius muttered breathlessly, stopping abruptly. He leaned against the rock-wall, a hand on his chest and another on the wall, steading him.

“Seriously, Padfoot?” James rested his hands on his knees, catching a breath. “We’re literally one turn away from the Fat Lady portrait.”

“Well, Prongs, ‘m sorry if not everyone here is a damn jock!” He quirked his brows with annoyance.

“You realise you’re also on the Quidditch team, right?” You chuckled.

“As a beater!” He cried out hysterically. “It’s not like I have to run in my broom through and through across the pitch for the entire match!”

“Padfoot…” Remus started, massaging the bridge of his nose to suppress a laugh. “Stop being such a drama queen, would ya?”

Before Sirius could hit back, a new meow sound alerted you of Mrs Norris’ closeness. Turning on your heels, the lot of you got ready to get back on running towards the opposite direction, but a creepy laugh coming from the hallway ahead of you, frustrated your plans.

“Fuck, it’s Filch!” James hissed, heaving a sigh.

“Now what?” Remus asked hopelessly. “If we turn around, we’ll run straight into Mrs Norris. If we go this way, we’ll run straight into Filch.”

“Well, we obviously can’t be here like sitting ducks,” you muttered, pacing around and desperately wishing a way out.

“Would you stop already?” Sirius rolled his eyes at you when you were about to complete your third round.

Before you could tell Sirius off, a sudden noise of rocks moving was heard and a large door made of bronze materialised itself on the wall out of thin air.

“What the bloody hell is that?” You asked no one in particular, approaching the door with a straightened arm, ready to touch the patterns engraved on it.

“Our way out, apparently,” James said as he took your opened hand in his and pushed the door open, dragging you inside the unknown room.

Sirius and Remus followed the two of you, closing the door behind them whilst looking around the peculiar room. It was messy and had all sorts of things scattered around it: an old enchanted harp that was playing a soothing old music by itself, a wooden cabinet with a strange shape and endless piles of old books and trinkets.

“What is this place?” You asked, gobsmacked. You had never seen it before and you were sure if anyone would know what that room was, it would be the three boys standing beside and behind you.

“I- I don’t know…” James whispered, equally awestruck. “We’ve never seen it before.”

Splitting up, each one of you followed a different direction, all eager to explore the newly-found refuge in Hogwarts. You wandered through the aisles, taking in the most strange and unique sights as your eyes spotted interesting magical objects. Turning on your left after a few meters, you went deeper and deeper into the labyrinth of junk, stopping suddenly when something odd caught your attention. On top of a blistered, small old cupboard laid a stone bust of an old warlock wearing a dusty wig. What really stood out to you, however, was an ancient discoloured tiara, sat lopsided upon the bust. It was beautiful and unique: a silver diadem in the shape of an eagle with open wings; it had a blue sapphire shaped like an oval right below the eagle’s head. Etched upon its surface was a quote: "Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure." You found yourself hypnotized by its beauty; it was as if you could feel an invisible force pulling you to it, wrapping you in its magnetic strength. You stretched your arms, reaching for the strange object. A cold and cruel chuckle filled the air.

“Y/N…” The voice to which the chuckles belonged to, whispered. You could feel your skin crawl, terrified, but you couldn’t break out of the trance.

Your fingers were almost touching the diadem when you felt a light pressure on your shoulder. Looking to your left, you found James staring at you with a frown.

“Are you alright, love?” He asked, narrowing his eyes. “I’ve called your name a few times but you didn’t seem to be listening.”

“Yeah- Yeah, ‘m fine,” you muttered slowly, retracting your arm and clutching your hands together on your chest.

James tilted his head as he eyed the object that had you so interested, turning his body in its direction. “What is it anyway?” He asked, walking towards the stone bust and motioning to grab the tiara.

“Don’t touch it!” You bawled as you quickly grabbed his hand. “I don’t think this is… good.”

“Do you think this is… dark magic?” James asked incredulously. “It wouldn’t be inside a room in Hogwarts if it was.”

“I just...” you started, resting your face in your hands. “Just please don’t touch it, ok? If anything ever happens to you, I-“

“Hey,” James whispered, taking your hands off your face. “I find it extremely cute that you’re worried about me, but you don’t have to, okay? I’m never leaving you.”

“Promise?” You stared pleadingly into his eyes.

“I promise,” he reassured you with a sweet smile. James cupped your cheeks with his hands and placed a kiss on your forehead, closing his eyes and letting his lips linger on your skin for a little bit longer before pressing his own forehead against yours.

You rested your hands of top of his and smiled at the messy-haired boy. The urge of kissing James felt so right in this moment, but you knew that was your hopelessly-in-love heart speaking. Unfortunately, your head knew better and the image of Lily and Harry floated in your mind, so you just stood there, staring lovingly into those piercing hazel eyes.

“They’re too quiet, Moony! I think they’re making out, we can’t barge in there!” You and James heard Sirius’ urgent whispers to Remus on the other side of the junk pile.

“They’re not making out!” Remus’ voice whispered back. “I too wish they were, but I don’t think they are. Are they?”

“No, we’re not!” You shouted with a roll of your eyes, smiling and getting away from James before your two friends could see you.

“But you should!” Sirius winged his brow as he entered your vision field.

“I agree!” James shrugged playfully, winking at you.

“Aren’t you forgetting about a little detail called Amos Diggory, mate?” Remus teased, pursing his lips together to suppress a laugh. “Too soon?” He added at the death glare James sent him.

“You can tease all you want, Moony,” James gave him a lopsided grin. “But don’t complain when you’re not chosen as best man in our wedding.”

“Excuse me? Wedding?” You looked at James, flabbergasted.

“Well, yeah,” he shrugged before wrapping his arm on your shoulders and guide you to the door. “I’m making you Mrs Potter one day.”

“You sound awfully sure for someone who doesn’t even got the girl yet, mate,” Sirius joked.

“But I will, Pads, but I will!” He patted his friend on the shoulder with his free hand.

“Aren’t you a cocky git? Godric!” you bumped your elbow against his side.

“What, love? You seriously thought I’d hand you to over to Diggory without a fight and watch him being happy with the woman I love? Not a chance!” He said bluntly with a confident smile.

You grimaced as you stared at the floor without knowing what to say. Your cheeks were warm and your stomach stubbornly fluttering at his words.

“Alright lovebirds, as your future best man that will always look out for your best interests, I advise you to head back to bed before the day rises and get some sleep,” Sirius smiled satisfied at his two smitten friends.

“And who made you best man, again? That will be me and you know it!” Remus teased, playfully wrestling the raven-haired boy.

And like that, amidst wedding chats and playful teases, the four of you headed back to the Gryffindor Tower.

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Taglist: @treestarrrrrrrr @fanfic-enthusiast-collector @jgtfvhsg @jullianerey @silver-winter-wolf @ladylizziesficsaves

#james potter #james potter x reader #james potter x you #sirius black #sirius black x reader #remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #sirius black imagine #remus lupin imagine #james potter imagine #harry potter #harry potter imagine #harry potter x reader #the marauders #the marauders imagine #rpwt imagine

187 notes · View notes

mtherhino · 3 years

Text

One side, two lives

Chapter twelve

You should be thanking me

First Previous Next

Warnings: talk of anorexia, self hatred, lot of swearing, swords, a bit of blood and general angst

Virgil yawned as he walked out of his room. He had finished beating Remus in super Mario carts a while ago and had decided to take a nap. As soon as he left his room his anxiety shot up. The former dark sidegriped his chest and leaned against the hallway wall to keep from falling down. He didn’t know why but he suddenly felt like he was on the verge of having a panic attack. He took a few deep breaths to try to calm himself down and not hyperventilate.

Once he calmed himself down enough to actually stand he started walking to the living room. He saw Patton sitting on the couch looking upset and Logan sitting at the dining table with annoyance written all over his face. Virgil didn’t know what to do. He had never been that great at comforting people and he didn’t even know what happened in the first place.

The former dark side looked back over at Patton again who was mumbling to himself and had a fairway look as he stared at the floor. Virgil couldn’t make out what he was saying but he heard the words “right “ and “wrong” a few times. In the end Virgil decided it would be better to try to talk to Logan rather than Patton, at least that way he couldn’t figure out what happened to make everyone upset and Thomas’s anxiety spike so suddenly.

The anxious side walked over the table and sat down. Logan looked up and Virgil gave him a confused look, the meaning was pretty clear, ‘what the hell happened?’ The logical side sighed and put down his book. He explained everything that happened during and after the wedding, making sure to keep his voice down the whole time. Although he tried to tell the story without any biases a bit of annoyance and anger slipped into his voice when he told Virgil about the others skipping over what he had to say.

When he finished his explanation Virgil didn’t know how to feel. He knew it was wrong what Roman had said to Deceit, even if he does hate the despicable snake, and he defiantly needs to apologies, but that doesn’t excuse the others behavior. Roman was trying to do what he thought was right, though his decisions may have been pretty bad he wasn’t trying to make all this shit happen, plus’s all of them had decided that Thomas would go to the wedding. Not only that but they all should have listened to Logan sooner, maybe they couldn’t have avoided some of this.

Not being able to think of anything to really say the purple clad side sighed tiredly. Logan nodded in agreement.

“That’s, that’s defiantly not good, any of it. I’m sorry you were talked over, I should have been there –“. Before he could finish his sentence Virgil was cut off.

“I mean no offense by this but I think it was a good thing you weren’t there. There was enough chaos as it was having anyone more there would have just added to it.”

Virgil went to argue but stoped himself. He knew deep down that Logan was right but that didn’t make the feeling of guilt and fear that was rooted in his mind go away.

“Thanks Logan. Now that I have all the fact I think I’ll go talk to Patton about all this. This was really helpful.” Logan smiled a little at the praise as Virgil went to talk to the father figure of the mind scape.

Virgil sat down on the other side of the couch from Patton who still had a faraway look in his eyes. The anxious side’s eyes softened, the description of Pattons panic attack didn’t sound good, and he wasn’t even there for it to see how bad it really was.

“Hey Pat.” The moral side looked up when he heard his name and seemed to be surprised to see Virgil next to him. Once he realizes it though he quickly put on a clearly strained d smile and sat up a bit more, putting on his “cheery” attitude.

“Oh hey kiddo! I didn’t hear you come in! What’s up?” Patton said with a smile. Virgil continued to look at the fatherly side with a sad expression.

“I heard about what happened today.” Patton’s smile faded into a look that wasn’t quite readable until it was replaced with a much sadder smile.

“I see. I’m sorry if we caused you any stress kiddo. Me and the others just had a…. disagreement on what was the right thing to do.” Patton tried to explain.

Virgil hummed and offered Patton a side hug. The moral side leaned into the hug and Virgil tried to comfort him. Just as the anxious side was about to say something all three light sides heard running coming from the hallway. The yellow clad dark side stoped in the entrance of the hallway, distress written on his face. Patton stood up and quickly walked over to deceit Janus.

“Janus whats wrong?”

“I most certainly wouldn’t like to know if any of you have seen Remus. I definitely “can” find him in the dark side of the mindscape.” The lying side said, worry dripping form his words.

Logan’s head shot up when he heard that, finally putting down his book and walking over to Janus, a concerned look on his face. It slightly surprised Virgil how worried the logical side looked, usually he showed as little emotion as he could.

“No I haven’t even seen him today, which is odd.” The logical side mumbled out the last part, confusing the others in the room. “Are you sure he isn’t in the imagination?” Logan said with a concerned frown.

The deceitful side shook his head.

“He “wouldn’t” have told me if he was going.” Janus said with sad and slightly guilty eyes. Virgil wasn’t sure why they held guilt in them but he decided it was about time he joined the conversation.

“I was playing Mario cart with him earlier today but that was at least two hours ago.” The anxious side said as he stuck his hands in his hoodie pockets, not liking the fact that the others where now looking at him. “He was acting like his normal Remus self at the time so I don’t know what could be wrong.”

The sides took a minute to ponder what could have happened. Out of know where a dark and ominous aura took over the room. Janus summoned his cane as soon as he felt it and the other prepared themselves for whatever was too come. Virgil watched in awe and horror as the room changed around them.

The warm tan colors on the wall shifted into a dark grey that had bits of gold speckling the color. The curtains became long and changed into a blood red velvet fabric. Almost everything in the room took on sharp twisting edges that looked like they could belong in a castle. Lastly a throne materialize from the ground at the back wall of the room, the perfect place to survey everything. The throne was a dark black that seems to soak up any light that touched it. The back and seat had some maroon red cushioning, gold tipped the edges of every spike, as well as right above where the head would be if someone where to sit down in the mighty chair. The room finally settled and it looked a lot more like a throne room then a living room. The sides took a minute to take in the now slightly unsettling features to the mindscape before a voice spoke up from behind them.

“Much better. The whole room was so bland, not at all befitting of a king.” An oddly familiar voice said. All the sides turned quickly to where the voice was coming form and saw a figure emerge from a cloud of mist. The figure, the side, had his head bowed so that they couldn’t see his face. Janus stepped in front with his cane in a defensive position ready to protect the others. Virgil tried to focus more on the new side and saw that had he had a golden cape trailing behind him as well as a glowing sword that he held in front of him like a cane, ready to be used if the need arises.

Virgil gasped a little and took a step back, making the others even more nervous then they already where. The reasons for the anxious sides actions where because he recognized this person in front of him. It’s him. The one I saw in my dreams, the one that kil-, Virgil shook his head trying not to think about that part of his dream. But how is this guy here? How is he even real?!

Janus was the first to say something as he raised his cane at the stranger.

“Who are you, and what do you want?” The snake like side hissed out, sounding a lot braver than he actually felt. The royal side laughed, a cruel and cold sound that made the other sides, light and dark, stiffened. The figure raised his head and the group group gasp lightly. Because there staring right at them with the most evil look any of them had ever seen, was their friend and prince, Roman.

Virgil was the first to speak this time.

“Roman? It that you?” The anxious side said with tears in his eyes as he took a small step forward, only for Janus to hold out an arm stopping him. Although the sides where all just aspects of Thomas, they each had little differences about there faces that made it easier to distinguish who was who, no one side could look exactly like another, not even Janus. However there stood someone that looked exactly like the creative side they all knew and cared for, all except for the side’s red and golden eyes. The side also had a black streak in his otherwise brown hair. The Roman- look-alike side barked a harsh laugh at the smaller side’s words.

“You think I’m that pathetic excuse for a side? Your idiotic prince? Well thankfully for all of you, I’m not.” The side said with a smile. Virgil growled and was about to speak up in Roman’s defense before Logan covered his mouth. The now angry purple side turned to the logical one of the group and glared. The taller side shook his head and mouthed the words ‘just wait’, his eyes giving away that he was more than a little weary about the situation. It took a minute but Virgil eventually nodded and Logan let him go hesitantly, both turning back to the new side.

“If I may, if your not Roman as you say, who are you?” Logan spoke up boldly. A smirk formed on the red eyed side’s farce.

“Well, Logan, I’m something a thousand times better than that stupid prince.” The side took a step forward, his word dragging behind him, while the others stepped back. “Im the most powerful side you’ll ever meet,” another step, “the true king of the imagination,” another step, the others backs hit the wall.

“And most importantly of all,” the side swung the sword forward so that it was now at Janus’s throat.

“The new king of the mindscape.” His smile was wide and his eyes glowed a dangerous gold.

“I am Pride.”

Janus glared at the person in front of him.

“That’s impossible, Roman holds the roll of pride. He’s literally Thomas’s Ego.” The dark side said. Pride growled in anger and Janus had to admit, he was tempted to take a step back. Still the yellow clad side had to hold his ground, besides, there was nowhere to go.

“Maybe he was at one point, but for quite a while now, even while imprisoned, the roll of pride has belonged to me.” The side smiled. “Roman hasn’t done a great job of filling in for my job so I decided to come back. That fool could never do anything right, don’t you agree?” When pride said does words he looked directly at both Patton and Janus. Janus only glared at the side more, but Patton wrapped his arms around himself, lowering his head in shame and guilt. The king’s smile only grew as he saw the effect his words had on the sides.

“What do you mean it was his roll?” Virgil said while he tried to stop himself from punching the man, though he wasn’t able to stop his glare.

“Why its quite simple really.” Pride said with what would be called a charming smile if it wasn’t so sinister. “You see when creativity was split into Roman and Remus, it wasn’t quite the clean cut everyone hoped for.” Patton only cowered more as the king spoke. “Remus wasn’t pure evil and Roman wasn’t pure good. Remus not only represents intrusive thoughts but also embodies self confrontation, which can help Thomas, where as Roman is not only Thomas’s hopes and dreams, but his pride and ego which where always considered as bad things.” Pride was frowning as he spoke about what he represented being something evil.

“That’s what Thomas and Roman where always told. That being prideful lead to selfishness and only thinking about yourself. It wasn’t long before Roman, who was still a child, started to hate this side of himself and kept thinking that if one part about him was wrong then he must be a bad person. I honestly don’t know where he could have gotten such black and white thinking from.” As Pride said this he glared at Patton, making the moral side tremble. Janus stepped between his gaze and glared right back at him. Pried rolled his eyes and continued, his sword now lowered.

“As Roman grew up his self hatred never stopped, and slowly but surely, he started to break.” The others eyes widened as they started to catch on to what pride was getting at. Pride smiled at the fear that was present in all there faces.

“Remus had tried to help his brother but to no avail, and one day, Roman couldn’t have been more than 13 years old, the young prince ran as far as he could into the imagination as voices screamed at him in his head, Remus chafed after him. The brothers ran all the way to the tallest mountain in the imagination, the land had shifted around them to make it easier for them. When Remus had finally caught up to his brother he found Roman crying in pain and with cracks of gold littering his skin. And before he knew it, Remus wasn’t looking at just his brother, but another entirely knew side.”Pride grinned as horror made its way onto all the sides faces. This is what he wanted, for them to see what their actions cost him.

“Roman had willingly tried to split himself again to make all of you happy, except this split didn’t turn out as well as the first. There just wasn’t enough to make two whole sides from an already split creativity. Since I was only a fraction of what he represented Roman stayed himself while I became something, new. So me and Roman where still connected afterwards, the only thing was that only one of us could exist in the mindscape.” Pride frowned at the floor as his memories darkened.

“I was the first to realize it, so of course I tried to kill him. If only one of us could exist, then it was going to be me.” The king’s frowned turned into a glare and his voice became harsher. “Roman caught on quick and started to fight me, Remus was still on the sidelines not knowing what to do and who to help. I’ll admit I wasn’t the brightest back then. While we fought I yelled at Roman about how everyone was going to pay for what they did to me.” The king shrugged, but the movement held much more anger then he thought it would.

“I would say I was right to be angry. I mean I was only created to be thrown away. Unlike Remus there wasn’t anything good that I represented. I was just the thing that everyone hated and wanted to get rid of, the thing everyone despised.” Pride turned his glare to the sides, all of them looking regretful as they found out about what their actions had caused. Good, Pride thought, they deserve to feel like shit after what they’ve done.

“ I would have won the fight if Roman and Remus hadn’t cheated. After hearing what I had said Remus had decided to help out Roman. After a while they finally beat me and my form started to disappear. They both that I was just too unstable, that I died and Roman just got his flaws back. And that’s how it stayed until recently.” The sides took a minute to take in the information.

“Wh-what happened that, that made you come back?” Patton asked, still not being able to look at Pride. Pride grinned, a mixture of joy, anger and satisfaction in his eyes.

“Well when Roman sacrificed what could have been Thomas’s big break his confidence was shattered, and since he became weaker, I finally grew strong enough to speak to him.” Patton’s eyes grew wide. Im the one that said we should go to the wedding. I’m the reason pride came back? I’m the reason where in this mess? Patton thought to himself.

“After that I helped to lower his ego and pride bit by bit, though it wasn’t very hard. I only told him things he already thought about himself. Plus Thomas was feeling so disheartened that Roman literally got sick! Ha! Honestly even if I never said a word to him I’m certain that his depression and self loathing would have done my job for me.” Pride said, chuckling a little at how simple it had all been.

Virgil felt nothing but white hot anger and sadness for his prince. This scumbag had been making Roman feel worse about himself than he already did and he took joy in it?! What kind of selfish bastard does that?! This time it took both Logan and Janus acting quickly to stop Virgil from charging and punching the royal side in the face.Pride turned to the enraged side and smiled.

“And that’s not even the worst of it. Before I even came back Roman was already suffering. He had horrible insomnia because he was worried about disappointing others by not getting his work done. And not to mention his eating disorder.” The other sides turned to Pride in confusing, except or Virgil, he simply looked broken as Pride confirmed his suspicions.

“Oh, don’t tell me you didn’t know? Roman had terrible anorexia, he could barely stomach eating half the time, if he could get away with it he would skip put on eating for days. He hated how he looked and even shape shifted in front of others to make himself look skinnier.” The king smiled at the horror and sadness that was painted on the sides faces. “Once he even said to me that he only ate because he didn’t want to pass out and not finish his work. He didn’t want to dissappoint everyone.”

Pride laughed distracting the others from their thoughts.

“Today just turned out to be the last straw for him. After trying his whole life to be good and be what other people wanted him to be, being called the evil twin broke him. His only purpose in life was to be Thomas’s hero and now he wasn’t even that.” Janus dropped his cane when he heard that. He knew after the video ended that he went too far and that he needed to apologize to Roman but… he hadn’t meant to hurt him like that. A thud was heard form behind him and when the dark side turned he saw that Patton had fallen to his knees, tears pouring down his face.

Pride ignored the fallen side and kept talking, wanting the other sides to hurt as much as possible.

“Once again Roman ran away into the imagination, except this time no one followed him. On accident he found himself right where it all began. He felt horrible for what he said to Janus and didn’t think anyone would ever forgive him. In the end Roman wished that he could disappear, spare everyone from his mistakes, so I helped make that wish come true. Your prince gave up, so I came back.”

The others let the words sink in. They had broken the prince so much he had wanted to just go away so that they would be ok. All of them had tears in there eyes at this point. Virgil did his best to keep his voice steady as he spoke.

“Where is he then. Where’s Roman, and Remus too for that matter.” Pride smiled and the room seemed to grow colder. “Honestly you should be thanking me that I got rid of those idiotic twins for you.” For a moment it seemed like time stoped. There was only silence. Then Virgil let out a cry of rage and charged at Pride. Logan didn’t hold him back this time, instead he charged with him, both of their eyes overflowing with tears.

Pride seemed unconcerned with the two enraged sides charging at him. He simply swept his hand to left and the whole room rotated, sending the two light sides crashing into the wall. Virgil groaned as he turned around and leaned against the wall. His noes was bleeding and he was fairly sure that he broke it. He looked over at Logan to see the logical side rubbing his head and with his glasses on the floor next to him, now broken in two. Before they could stand up a glowing sword was pointed at their faces.

“Just give up. Your friends are gone, and there never coming back.”

Wow it’s been a while. Sorry iv been gone for so long guys, school just started up again and it been hard trying to find time to just sit down and write. Anyways I hope you enjoyed this slightly longer than average chapter, I tried to put all the angst in it I could. I hope that your all on the edge of your seat waiting to find out what happens next. Well I’m going to go die now, have a good week humans, bye!

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@lovelivingmydreams

#my writing #roman sanders #sander sides #virgil sanders #pride!roman #prinxiety #intrological #remus sanders #logan sanders #deciet sanders #patton sanders #slight mention of eating disorder #mention of self hatred #roman angst

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aidanchaser · 3 years

Text

Chapter 19: The Fox and the Hare

Table of Contents beta’d by @ageofzero @magic713m @ccboomer @aubsenroute @somebodyswatson

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Everyone Lives AU Chapter 19 The Fox and the Hare

Remus pulled his cloak closed around his throat as he fought the stiff winds that pushed their way through London. His bones ached enough after the full moon without stepping out into a bracing winter, but he ignored the protest in his joints. Not only did he want the details about what had happened to James, he was eager to see Tonks.

He had only seen his wife once since his abrupt departure back in August. The guilt for leaving her in the first place still ached if he reflected on it for too long. He knew that James and Lily were right. Tonks needed him, and he needed to be with her. If he, James, and Lily had not been caught leaving the Longbottoms’ estate, he probably would have gone straight back to Tonks. But James’ capture had changed everything.

They had lost James and Harry in a day, and though they trusted that Harry was safe, it was not the same as knowing that Harry was safe. Lily and Remus had spent most of their days scouring every scrap of newspaper they could get their hands on for any clues or sightings. The phrase, “no news is good news,” was repeated often, and though they believed it when it came to Harry, each day without news of James seemed to wear away a little more of each of them.

It wasn’t until they were finally able to connect with Sirius that Remus had felt comfortable leaving Lily for a few days and risking a return to Tonks’ house to apologise.

He had known he would be lucky if Tonks accepted his apology. Though he was still afraid of all the things he had been afraid of when he had left, he understood now that his fears were something they had to share.

Remus was not used to sharing the weight of his burdens with others. It was something none of his friends were particularly good at, but he and Lily had been forced to practice it these last few months. If they had not shared their anxiety over James and Harry with each other, they might have torn each other apart.

Though Remus did not think he deserved to be forgiven, Tonks had welcomed him back with an astonishing grace. Remus wished he had shown the same grace to Sirius, when he had betrayed him to Snape during their years at Hogwarts, or that they had shown each other the same grace with each other after the truth of Peter’s betrayal had been revealed. There was no knowing what they might have gained in the last fifteen years if only they had learned to forgive themselves and each other with half the ease that Tonks did.

Unfortunately, Remus and Tonks had not had much time together during his visit. Not only were Death Eaters watching her parents’ house vigilantly, the Muggle-born Registration Commission visited frequently to make sure that Ted Tonks was not hiding nearby. Remus may not have been Muggle-born, but blood-purists weren’t any more fond of what he was, and the Ministry was almost as desperate for his head as they were Harry’s.

So he and Tonks had filled their few days with as much as they could. His admission of guilt and his apology were all he really had the emotional fortitude for, but there was so much more for them to take care of beyond their reconciliation.

Once Tonks had assured him that he was forgiven, she had immediately begun planning ways to stay in touch. She was the one who had suggested they use the Times and had given Remus and Sirius their code names.

“We can’t use Moony,” she had said, “since too many people you went to school with are Death Eaters. Sirius can be the Black Sheep. He’ll think it’s funny. I’ll be the White Rabbit, and you can be… the Silver Fox!”

Remus had blushed and become suddenly self-conscious of his greying hair, but he hadn’t argued with her. A fox was better than a wolf. “What about Lily?” he had asked.

She had taken a bit longer to come up with a code name for Lily, but she had eventually suggested Red Hind. So when he had seen a classified ad in the Times from a White Rabbit claiming to have news about a Red Hart, he had known instantly that it meant James. He only hoped no one else had recognised the message and decoded the meeting time and place.

The other crucial thing he and Tonks had discussed the last time they had seen each other was her pregnancy. There was still every possibility that their child could be a werewolf — though Remus prayed to God, Merlin, and whatever else might hear him that it would not be — so they had to make sure Tonks had the right sort of care.

“I talked to my friend Penny,” Tonks had said.

Remus had looked up at her from his seat on the floor beside her bed. “What did you tell her?”

“I didn’t name you, if that’s what you’re worried about. I wouldn’t do that to you.” Tonks had slid off the bed and sat down beside him. “She recommended a Healer to me. I know Mum said I ought to find a midwife, but I thought — you know, just in case — it would be best to have a Healer.”

Though they had not done much but talk for two days, Remus’ well of emotions had been thoroughly drained, and he had not had it in him to do much more than hum in agreement.

Remus was still trying to wrap his head around being a father. On good days, he was a little excited. He had helped raise Harry, after all, and he had the benefit of James and Lily’s experience. But there were still days that his guilt and fear overwhelmed him, and he wondered why he had ever dared to fall in love with someone in the first place.

Today was not one of his dark days. Today, he was excited to see Tonks, to hear how she was doing, and to know what she had learned about James.

A short walk from the rundown brick building, whose worn name labeled it “Purge and Dowse, Ltd.,” rested a copse of trees that guarded a steep drop in the ground before leveling out into someone’s residence. Remus slipped down the frost-hardened embankment until he was no longer in view of the street. He looked around for Tonks but a crack startled him, and he pulled his wand from his cloak.

She was behind him suddenly, and it took all of Remus’ mental fortitude not to curse her immediately as she threw her arms around him and kissed him.

Though Remus did not want to pull away, he remained practical. “Dora — stop — One of these days it won’t be you and I’ll end up dead for hesitating.”

She pouted, as she always did when he pulled away from a kiss too early, and wrinkled her nose until it was almost entirely absorbed by her face, then grew it back out. “Good enough?” she asked.

“And if I’m not me?”

She shrugged.

“You shouldn’t be Apparating, you know.”

“See? That’s something only the real Remus would say.”

“Andromeda would say it too.” Remus held her at arm’s length for a moment and looked her over. It was hard to make out any details about her figure beneath the cloak, but he thought she looked well. She was a bit flushed, but seemed happy, all things considered.

“You are alright?” he asked.

“Of course.” She started up the embankment. “Come on, we don’t want to be late.”

Remus hurried after her. “Late for what? I thought you had news about James.”

“Not here in the open.” Tonks grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the condemned shopping centre across the street.

It took everything Remus had not to dig his heels in and throw a tantrum like a toddler. Not only was he impatient for her news, he had no interest in entering that building unless it was a life or death situation.

“Wait —” he said.

But Tonks wasn’t paying attention to him. She led him around the corner to a window decorated with a set of shabby mannequins, half-dressed and faded by sun. She whispered something into the glass, then finally turned and looked at Remus.

“Oh,” she said. “We’d better do something about your face. May I?”

Remus was worried about being recognised, certainly, but that wasn’t his main source of fear. He didn’t know how to explain the anxiety that crawled up his throat to Tonks, though, so he nodded dumbly.

“I’ll be careful,” she promised. “It’s harder on others, but McGonagall always said I had a knack for it.”

As Tonks pressed her wand against his cheek, Remus felt the sharp, gaunt lines of his face fill in and soften. He could see the edges of his hair darken. He imagined she was getting rid of his most noticeable feature as well: his scars.

Once she was satisfied, she pulled him through the glass window.

Unlike the last time Remus had visited, in the dead of the night after the battle in the Department of Mysteries, the lobby of St Mungo’s was full. People crowded around on all sides and made a cacophony of unfortunate noises — retching, shrieking, singing off-key — but Tonks ignored the chaos and pulled Remus into the line behind the reception desk.

He squeezed her hand and focused his attention on exactly two sensations: steady breathing and her fingers laced through his.

Remus had been to St Mungo’s exactly three times as an adult. Once, when Harry had fallen into a Bearded Bramble and had developed a rash that was beyond his skill to treat, then years later when Arthur Weasley had nearly been killed on duty for the Order, and finally two summers ago, when Voldemort had attacked the Ministry, and James, Lily, and Dora had all nearly died.

Each time, Remus had been here at St Mungo’s because someone he cared about was in danger. It was easier to manage his anxiety about St Mungo’s if there was a larger, more pressing anxiety consuming him first, and if he wasn’t the one submitting himself to a Healer’s care.

He reminded himself that, in all likelihood, they were not here for him. Tonks had even obscured his face. There was no way for anyone they spoke with to know who he was, or worse, what he was.

When they reached the desk of the Welcome Witch, Tonks told her that they had an appointment.

“Name?” the Welcome Witch asked.

“Black.” Tonks said without hesitation.

The witch directed them to wait, and Tonks pulled him into one of the uncomfortable wooden chairs along the wall. Remus wondered if perhaps the conversation with the Welcome Witch had not been about an appointment at all. Perhaps it was another coded message. Had the Welcome Witch been the one to tell Tonks about James?

He took a moment to wet his lips before asking, “Is James here?”

Tonks shook her head. “We’ll talk where no one’s around,” she whispered. “Where could be more protected than a Healer’s office?”

He wanted to ask if they really needed to be here, if he could not just take her to Lily, but before he could find the words, a young man in green robes stepped out of the lift, glanced at the clipboard in his hand, and announced, “Nymphadora Black.”

Though none of those names were ones that Tonks liked for herself, she jumped to her feet and tugged Remus with her. As the young man pushed the button for the first floor, a high-pitched whine began to rise in Remus’ ears. When the lift doors opened only a moment later, Tonks pulled him forward again. But this time, he didn’t follow. Remus’ feet were stuck to the floor as surely as if he’d been hit with one of Sirius’ Permanent Sticking Charms.

“Remus?” she asked.

His mouth was dry. He wanted to remind her that she shouldn’t use his real name, but the words didn’t come. He wanted to tell her he would wait outside, and he would be there for her after this was over, no matter what, but those words didn’t come, either.

With an incredible force of will, he stumbled out of the lift.

The first floor itself had not changed since he had been here with the Weasleys during Arthur’s stay, and it had not changed since he was a boy. The smell of alcohol and antiseptic made him dizzy, and the dark paneling seemed to disappear at the edges of his vision, giving him the strange impression that the walls were disappearing as they passed — along with their exit. It was all he could do to stumble after Tonks and the Healer.

The walk was longer than any Remus had taken down this hall, he was sure of it. They passed ward after ward until, finally, the young man opened a door and led them into a private office. Remus could not focus enough to read the name on the door, but through the high-pitched whine in his ears, he did make out the young man’s words.

“The Healer will be with you in a moment, Ms Black,” he said.

The office was small and sparsely decorated. Most of the space was taken up by the desk at the center and a pair of chairs opposite. The only real personalisation to the room was a photograph of a sunrise hanging next to the window. The sunlight glittered on the surface of a lake as the photograph moved, but the sun remained on the horizon in permanent dawn.

Bookshelves lined the other walls, and Remus was able to recognise a few of the texts from Sirius’ collection, though Sirius would never have kept his books organised so neatly. Even though Remus was not familiar with much of Healing magic, he could tell that the shelves were organised into sections on anatomy, Charms, and, he noted glumly, an entire three shelves devoted to dangerous Creatures. There was more than one text on werewolves.

“Remus, sit,” Tonks said. “You look like you’re about to faint. I’m not giving birth yet.”

Remus fell into one of the chairs and forced himself to look at her.

He had been so excited to see her, and now he wanted nothing more than to run. He struggled to bring his thoughts into line, into any reasonable order so that he might explain himself. He tried to remember why they were here.

She crouched beside his chair and put a hand on his wrist. “Did I accidentally make you look that peaky or is something wrong? Remus?”

His tongue felt like lead, but he remembered, distantly, why they had needed a private office. “What did you learn about James?”

Worry creased her brow, which was an unusual look for Dora. She rubbed the back of his hand with her thumb and though she could not know how much it helped, he allowed the gentle touch to ground him.

“He’s definitely alive,” she said. “Cedric Diggory stopped by after one of the M.R.C.’s absurd little raids. Mum’s about ready to put traps in the cupboards, she’s so tired of them tearing up her pantry.”

Usually, Remus was fond of Tonks’ wandering stories. She included details about people that made him laugh or that simply showed that she cared. At this moment, however, he could only process so much information.

“What did Diggory say?” he asked.

“Some Snatchers brought James in two nights ago.”

“Snatchers? Why — how?”

Tonks shrugged. “Still working it out, but we — oh!” She abandoned his hand and pressed her palm against her stomach. Her face turned from worried to silly in an instant.

“The baby started kicking a couple weeks ago. Here,” she grabbed his hand and placed it on her belly.

Remus had been looking for changes in Tonks’ body, but they were far too subtle to observe beneath her robes. Now that he was touching her, he could feel the new curve of her stomach. She wasn’t much bigger, just fuller, but Sirius and Lily had both told him that the obvious growth would probably come soon. Remus just hoped he would be around to see it.

Then, beneath her stomach, something moved, pressing against his hand. Remus pulled away.

Tonks laughed. “It’s alright.” She reached for his hand again.

But it wasn’t alright. Panic thrummed in Remus’ every muscle and bone, and the only thing that kept him from leaping out of his chair and pacing the room was Tonks’ hand around his wrist.

The day had started out so pleasant. He had been so happy to see her, and so excited to finally have a lead on James. Now he was sitting in an office in St Mungo’s on the floor for Creature-Induced Injuries, facing down memories of some of the worst moments of his childhood and every possibility that the same future awaited his own child.

“Remus.” Her joy was gone. Instead, her voice was firm but gentle. It was the same voice she had had at the kitchen table when she had asked him to go on this journey with her. “Hey, look at me, please?”

He did. She bit down on her lower lip, pulling her worried frown into something closer to a pout. Her cheekbones were sharp today, and her eyes grey. She looked more like her mother than her father. She looked more like Sirius. He might have wondered if she did it on purpose, but the last time he had seen her, she had chosen the same round face she’d worn when she met him, the face she’d had when she’d married him. Both of those faces were Tonks, just as both his joy and fear were truly him.

They both flinched as something — the baby — their baby — kicked against his hand.

“Will you tell me what’s wrong?” she asked.

He appreciated the way she had phrased the question. It did not give him room to lie, at least not in the ways he was used to.

“I wouldn’t know where to start,” he said.

The door behind them creaked, and every piece of tranquility that Remus had managed to cling to evaporated as the Healer walked in. At least Tonks did not let go of his hand, even as she stood.

The Healer had short, grey hair, and she wore a lime-green smock. Remus struggled to guess her age. She did not look old, exactly, but she looked worn in a way that suggested her experience outstripped her years. It was a feeling Remus was familiar with. She had a pale but pleasant smile as she looked first at Remus, then at Tonks.

“It is you,” she said. “I wondered how many Nymphadoras there were out there.”

Tonks wrinkled her nose. “Only the one, which I expect is best for everyone.”

“I take it this isn’t a social visit, or you wouldn’t have made an appointment? I don’t get many appointments. Most people don’t plan on any of the injuries they get working with Creatures.”

The Healer removed her smock and used her wand to drape it on a hook by the door. She took a seat at her desk and eyed Remus curiously. “Are you the source of Tonks’ name change?” she asked.

“Oh — er —”

Tonks saved him. “Yes and no.” She sat in the empty chair with a bit more care than usual, and Remus wished he’d had the foresight to help her. “We are married,” she said, “but I thought it’d be best to use my mother’s maiden name.”

Remus thought that was an unusually prescient decision for Tonks to make and wondered if Andromeda had suggested it. He noticed, too, how she had not bothered to introduce him to the Healer. “Tonks” and “Lupin” were equally undesirable names at the moment.

The Healer’s smile was sad, like she sympathised with Tonks’ decision. “It’s certainly… unfortunate times.” She fidgeted with an opalescent pendant at her neck. “You still haven’t said why you’re here.”

“Oh!” Tonks sat up straighter. “Penny said you could help us. We’re having a baby.”

The Healer blinked at them. “I’m not a midwife. I can help you find one, if you like, but I work with injuries from Creatures. I deal with venoms, broken bones, and bites.”

Remus was proud of himself for not flinching when she said “bites,” but he did squeeze Tonks’ hand a bit more tightly.

“I know,” Tonks said, “but we have sort of… a unique situation.” She looked to Remus for help, but he did not know how to help her. He knew what she wanted him to say, but he could not give it. He could not out himself to a Healer.

Tonks bit down on her lower lip. “It’s just something we want to be sure about, and if the baby is, er — cursed — we want to make sure that we have everything we need. Penny said we could trust you.”

Though Tonks was looking at Remus as she said it, the Healer’s hands stopped fidgeting with her necklace. Her pleasant voice turned guarded. “What else did Penny say about me?”

“Only that you’d help us,” Tonks assured her.

Remus could see Tonks struggling to build an argument that convinced this Healer they would need her without telling her what Remus was, and as much as Remus wanted to keep his identity from this woman, he did not see any other way to get what Tonks needed.

But knowing that he needed to tell this woman the truth, for the sake of Tonks and their child, was so far removed from being able to do it. He had spent three decades doing everything he could to hide the truth about himself from others, especially from someone like this woman in front of him, who had every legal authority to confine him. He did not have the courage to tell her the truth.

But, really, what secret was left to keep? His face was printed in every issue of the Daily Prophet with a very clear warning about what he was printed beneath his picture.

Remus sank down into his chair and did his best to make himself appear small and nonthreatening, and though drawing attention to himself was the very last thing he wanted to do, he said, “I —” The words caught in his throat as the Healer looked at him. He swallowed and started over. “I don’t think Tonks introduced us.”

The Healer looked at him warily. “No, she didn’t.”

Instinctively, Remus reviewed in his mind the distance from his chair to the door in her office, and weighed his speed against how fast she could draw her wand. It had not been long since his last transformation and parts of him still ached. He did not like his chances.

Tonks squeezed his hand again.

“I’m her husband — Remus Lupin.”

A new anxiety filled Remus, purely because he had no idea how to interpret the Healer’s response. Her stiff posture visibly relaxed and she even smiled a little. It did not fit with anything he had encountered before. Fear, anger, suspicion — even pity — were responses he was familiar with. This was entirely unprecedented.

“You look different from your picture in the Prophet,” she said.

“That’s my handiwork,” said Tonks.

The Healer tugged on her necklace pendant as she eyed Remus, and Remus searched for a more comfortable sitting position, even though he knew it wasn’t his physical position that was uncomfortable.

Finally, she pursed her lips and said, “I think I understand why Penny suggested that you ask for my help,” the Healer said. “And I understand why you were so afraid to ask. But Penny was right: you can trust me.”

They spent the rest of the meeting discussing Tonks’ health and pregnancy. The Healer, as she had said, was not a midwife, and had to consult a few of her books throughout the meeting. She never reached for her books on werewolves, though they touched on the possibility. The Healer was confident there was no recorded case of birth complications because of lycanthropy, but she admitted she didn’t know if that was because it had never happened or it had just never been written about. More impressive to Remus than her knowledge of lycanthropy was the care she spoke with. Remus had never had a pleasant interaction with a Healer who had known what he was. Until today.

They set dates for Tonks to check in with the Healer, and though Remus might not be able to be present for all of them, simply knowing the plan helped. He knew, too, that if they had simply found a midwife and left lycanthropy out of it, his anxiety would have remained wild and untameable. Having a Healer who understood them allowed Remus to manage his fears in a way he was entirely unprepared for. He had never met Tonks’ friend Penny, but he thought about sending her a very grateful letter, and wondered if he shouldn’t meet more of Tonks’ friends from school. Tonks had integrated into his pack easily enough, and maybe he shouldn’t be so terrified of getting to know hers.

As the meeting came to a close, the Healer stood to escort them out.

“Oh —” Tonks did not stand, even as Remus started to get up. “Could Remus and I have a moment, just us?”

“Of course.” The Healer held out her hand. “It was a pleasure to meet you, Lupin.”

Remus shook her hand, and it wasn’t until she was gone that he realised he had not gotten her name.

“Are you alright?” Tonks asked.

He nodded, and was a bit surprised to find that it was actually true.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I really thought we could get through that without telling her everything, at least not right away. Maybe I should have come alone, but I just wanted you to be with me for as much of this as you can.”

“I understand.” He ran his hand over his mouth and tried, desperately to put the truth in his words. His instinct was to tell her that it was alright, and everything had worked out, so what point was there in talking about what had gone wrong? But Sirius’ admonishments about lying echoed in his memory. He had to be truthful with Tonks, who did not know him the way Sirius did, and never would if he did not let her.

“I just wish you had explained before,” he said. “I don’t… care much for hospitals. It would have helped to be prepared, to know who we were meeting and why.”

An apology rose in her face, but she bit it back. She let his words hang in the space between them, and he could tell she was wrestling with patience as much as he was wrestling with honesty.

“Okay,” she finally said. “I am sorry — I’ll pay more attention. I’ll communicate better and try to at least talk through my impulses before I drag you into them.”

“Thank you.” Remus looked down at his hands and twisted the plain gold wedding band on his finger. He still had not figured out what Charm James had put into it.

“You never finished telling me your news about James,” he said.

“That’s why I asked for some privacy, so I could tell you, but I wanted to make sure you were okay first.”

He nodded. “I am, truly. Tell me what Cedric said. You said Snatchers were involved?”

“Yeah, that’s weird, right? I don’t know how James ended up with Snatchers, but they took him to the Ministry and he’s in Azkaban now.”

“You’re sure?”

“Thelborne got confirmation of James’ arrest and safe transfer to Azkaban. The Ministry hasn’t made James’ arrest public yet, but Cedric thinks they will soon. He said that it’ll be the best way for them to get Harry.”

Remus’ stomach dropped and the temporary peace he had found withered away. “I guess we should pray that Sirius finds Harry first.”

Tonks raised an eyebrow. “You think Sirius won’t also show up and make a scene?”

He tightened his jaw. “I’m going to make sure that he doesn’t. We’ll find a way to get James back, but we won’t do it by walking into a trap.”

She reached out and took his hand. He could tell from the careful way she traced the lines in his palm that she was preparing to say something difficult. He wondered if it was difficult to say, or just difficult to hear. Perhaps it was both.

“I’m going to say some things about Sirius,” she finally said, “and I do have questions I want you to answer, but you don’t have to answer all of them, or any of them, I guess, if you aren’t ready, okay? Is that… enough preparing you before I jump into something?”

Remus felt his throat tighten, but he appreciated her attempt at delicacy. He nodded.

“Did Sirius talk to you before you left back in August?”

Guilt flared. It was tempered by the fact that he was here now, that he had sat through a very difficult meeting for her sake. Knowing that helped him find his words again. “A little. He mostly admonished me for being a coward.”

“That’s not what I told him to say.” She frowned down at Remus’ hand. “You know he still loves you, right?”

“I chose you,” but even as Remus said it, he heard the denial. Sirius had called him a liar, not just because he lied to his friends but because he lied to himself.

“Why?” she asked.

It had been one year ago, almost exactly, that Sirius had pulled a very similar conversation out of Remus. Sirius had forced Remus to talk through his feelings, for both Tonks and Sirius, and had then denied Remus his choice. Sirius had all but insisted that Remus choose Tonks. Remus did not think he had made the wrong choice — though he had certainly doubted himself in those first few weeks after learning about her pregnancy — but he wondered why Tonks was bringing it up now. He did not think saying, “Sirius told me to choose you,” was the assurance that she wanted.

“Because I love you,” he said.

“But you also love Sirius,” she said. And it wasn’t a question.

He swallowed. “I do.”

The wedding band that James had given him grew warm, suddenly. It was not uncomfortable, but he pulled it from his finger anyway, and his heart broke.

Glowing script on the outside of the band read, “Moony & Dora,” and on the inside were the words, “Mischief Managed.”

How unfair, for him to solve James’ silly riddle and discover Sirius’ gift in an admission of love not to his wife, not to the person and bond that this ring symbolised, but to someone else entirely.

Dora’s hands closed around his, hiding the words from view and forcing him to look at her ring finger, decorated in two bands — his mother’s ring and the band that matched his.

“I’m not mad, Remus. I’m not jealous or upset, okay? I love you, and I know, with absolute certainty, that you love me. You’ve shown it in a hundred different ways, some precious and some obnoxious, but I know that you truly love me. And I know it’s been a lot of hard work for you to understand that I love you. I can imagine that it took a lot of hard work to understand Sirius’ love, too. That’s what I really wanted to say, that you’re allowed to have everything, Remus. You really are.”

Remus struggled to put meaning to her words. He understood them, of course, but to truly know what she meant was a hurdle he wasn’t sure he was ready to climb just yet.

“Christmas is just a week away,” she said, “and I think if Mum doesn’t get to see Sirius and Regulus, she’ll lose her mind, so take a week to think it over, to figure out what you want — you know — to prepare yourself, and then we’ll talk it over again.”

Remus was not sure a week would be enough time, but he was glad to have a different conversation topic. “How are we supposed to see you on Christmas? I’m sure the watch on your home will be doubled.”

“We’ll come to you. Mum and I can Apparate to wherever you are. If we’re lucky, we’ll get snowed in and won’t be able to leave you.”

She smiled, but he could not bring himself to match her joy. There might be joy in him somewhere, but it was buried under so much fear, guilt, and anxiety.

“You shouldn’t be Apparating at all,” he finally said, and she kissed his cheek.

Their goodbye was always going to be a bit melancholy — there was never any guarantee they would see each other again — but it was much more subdued than Remus would have liked. He did insist on Apparating Tonks home, to make sure she didn’t Splinch herself or the baby still growing inside of her, before Apparating back to the place he, Sirius, Lily, and Regulus had been hiding out in since the last full moon.

The winds were stronger out in the countryside, and the cold sharper. Remus shivered and hurried through the protective barriers around their hidden camp and into the safety of the Potters’ tent.

Warmth and the smell of freshly brewed tea hit him immediately. He heard Sirius’ voice, and his heart rate doubled with both the joy of knowing Sirius was home safe, and the anxiety left by Tonks’ parting advice.

Then, he heard an unexpected voice, and his anxiety vanished instantly, replaced with all-consuming wonder and joy. Though he was nearly dizzy with happiness, Remus ran from the small entrance to the curtained-off kitchen. He barely had time to take in the dark messy hair and thick glasses before Harry was in his arms.

Remus held him tightly, unsure that this moment was real. He wondered, briefly, if this entire day had been a dream. Had he really met Tonks? Met a Healer who had been kind, knowing what he was? Had his wife really suggested it was alright for him to still love Sirius? Was Harry really, truly here? Was he safe?

He opened his eyes and looked at Sirius and Lily, still seated at the table with patient smiles. Surely they had been just as overwhelmed to see Harry.

“Where?” he mouthed to Sirius.

When he finally could let Harry go without being afraid that Harry would disappear before his eyes, Sirius told him how he and Regulus had finally found Harry at Privet Drive.

Lily handed Remus a cup of tea. “They came back as soon as Sirius found Tonks’ message in the Times today. Which, speaking of, what did you find out?” Her eagerness for news of James was so thinly restrained that Remus hurriedly shared what Tonks had told him about James, how he had been taken to the Ministry by Snatchers.

“But that doesn’t make sense,” Harry said. “Why would Vol —”

“No!” Remus and Sirius shouted at once as Lily also said, “Harry, don’t —”

Harry tensed, startled by their sudden outburst. “What?”

Lily’s voice shook as she explained. “The Ministry has put a Taboo on the name. Anyone who uses it will immediately draw the attention of Snatchers.”

“It’s probably the most intelligent thing they’ve done to track down the Order and other supporters of Dumbledore,” Sirius added. “Those most likely to use You-Know-Who’s name are those most likely to be fighting against the Ministry.”

“It’s how we nearly got caught in Godric’s Hollow,” said Remus. “They nearly got Mad-Eye last month, too.”

Harry frowned, but did not argue. “Okay, fine, but I still don’t understand why Vol — er — You-Know-Who would change his plans for Dad now. Why keep him prisoner and suddenly hand him off to Snatchers after almost four months?”

Remus had been mulling this over, too, in-between thoughts about Tonks and Sirius, and he didn’t like any of the answers he had come up with.

“Maybe,” Sirius suggested, “James escaped, and was recaptured by Snatchers before he could find us.”

“I doubt it,” Remus said quietly.

“You’re the one who said no prison could hold Prongs,” Harry said.

Lily’s green eyes were unusually cold as they evaluated Remus. “You think it’s a trap.”

Tonks and Cedric certainly seemed to think so, and Remus was inclined to agree with them. “If the Ministry announces that they’ve arrested James,” Remus said, “and if they publish a date for a trial, we have to let it happen.”

He was met with shouts of protest from everyone at the table.

“I know that’s not the news we want,” he said over them, “but the most likely explanation for why James has been moved from the Death Eaters to the Ministry is to use him against us.”

“What if we raided Azkaban instead?” Lily suggested.

Sirius shook his head. “That’s ridiculous. You can’t break someone out of Azkaban.”

“Why not?” asked Harry. “Regulus broke out of Azkaban.”

“Regulus is a cat! I know James and I can change our form too, but you think they haven’t added protections against Animagi since that’s how both Barty and Reg escaped? You think you can just waltz right in and find James amongst thousands of cells? Even the Death Eaters that broke out two years ago had the help of the Dementors. We’ll just have to be ready to take James at the trial, even if it is a trap.”

“Where is Regulus?” asked Remus. He wanted assistance from someone else willing to look at the situation practically.

“Said he had to run an errand.” Sirius looked at Harry, like Harry might know more about it, but Harry only shrugged.

“He hasn’t told me any more than he’s told you,” said Harry, but Harry lied the way James did, which was to say he lied incredibly poorly.

Lily drummed her fingers against her mug. “I still think I could do it.”

Remus sighed and shook his head. “As strong as you’ve gotten without the use of your wand, Sirius is right. We can’t take on Azkaban. And I’m right — we can’t get James at the Ministry. You know he’ll be furious if we lose even one person trying to save him.”

“We can’t do nothing,” Harry said.

“You’re not coming no matter what we do,” Lily said. Before Harry could argue, she said, “I’ve only just got you back from Merlin knows where, and I’m not about to let you run off again.”

“I’m not going to run off! I want to help Dad!”

Remus finished his tea while Lily, Sirius, and Harry argued. He was exhausted from the extreme highs and lows of his day, and did not have the patience to carefully talk his impulsive friends down from their half-baked plans. There was no sense in raiding Azkaban or the Ministry. They would lose, and if the Ministry got a hold of Harry, Voldemort would kill him, and that would be the end of everything.

While Sirius tried to outline a plan that involved impersonating Hit Wizards, Remus left the table and washed his cup. He listened half-heartedly as Lily pointed out, rightly, that it would be impossible to know which Hit Wizards to impersonate. Harry suggested that if he could get his hands on a broom, he could fly in and out of Azkaban, and Sirius had to explain why the wards around the prison made that impossible.

Remus abandoned the kitchen in favour of peace and quiet. He retreated to the bunk that he had been using these last few months. There were three bedrooms in the tent, and Remus supposed he would have to share this bunk with Harry from now on. He didn’t mind. He thought that might even make it easier to keep Harry from running off again.

Remus trusted Dumbledore — Dumbledore had saved his life in a multitude of ways — but whatever Dumbledore had left for Harry terrified Remus. Dumbledore so rarely left instructions without explanations. Even the prophecy had been kept secret for a reason. There was no reason, as far as he could fathom, why Dumbledore would ask Harry to keep a task secret from James and Lily.

Remus was usually the first person to suggest that Harry should make his own choices, but the weight of the world was a burden no one person should bear. Harry said that he had his friends, but it was obvious that Ron and Hermione weren’t here. If they were in danger, the conversation at the table would surely have gone differently. But wherever they were, they weren’t with Harry, and that worried Remus. He was not going to let Harry do this alone, anymore than he was going to let Lily storm Azkaban alone or let Sirius walk right into a trap set by the Ministry.

Maybe he was almost ready to be a proper parent after all.

He was just about to drift off when he heard someone walk in. He was familiar with the weight of Sirius’ footsteps and wondered vaguely if, for some reason, Harry had decided to bunk with Regulus, and Sirius had been shunted off to Remus’ bunk.

“Promise me you aren’t about to tell me Lily or Harry have run off to Azkaban,” he murmured without opening his eyes.

The weight of the bedding shifted as Sirius sat down. “No, we’ve at least agreed to wait for more news, whether from the Prophet or Tonks.” Sirius paused, then asked, “How is Tonks? You didn’t say much about her.”

“I thought the information on James was more pressing.”

“Is she okay?”

“If she wasn’t, I would tell you.”

“Are you okay?”

Remus didn’t answer. Not because he wasn’t okay, exactly, but because he was not sure how to tell Sirius about his day with Tonks and assure Sirius he really was alright.

“Remus —”

“We visited a Healer,” Remus said. He did not open his eyes. He did not want to see the worry on Sirius’ face. “It was fine. She was actually… kind. She knew Tonks already and she listened to our concerns. Then we used the privacy of her office to talk about James without being overheard.”

Sirius was quiet long enough that when he finally said, “You really need a Healer other than me?”

Remus opened his eyes and was relieved to see that Sirius was grinning.

“Have you ever helped birth a child?” Remus asked with a matching smile.

“I was present when Harry was born. And I didn’t pass out like James did.”

“I didn’t get the Healer’s name, but I’m sure you’ll meet her soon.”

“I guess if you like her, I’ll trust your judgement.” Sirius stood and stretched.

“Sirius — wait —”

He did, but Remus wasn’t entirely sure what he wanted from Sirius. He thought of all the effort he put into being honest with Tonks today, and wondered if he had enough strength left for this conversation.

“James said you designed the wedding rings,” he finally said, which was as close to what he wanted to talk about as he could manage.

“Everything alright with them?”

“I was just wondering how often someone really says, ‘I do,’ outside of wedding vows.”

“As often as you want to, I suppose.”

What Remus had wanted to say, the other half of that conversation with Tonks, slipped away. He appreciated Tonks’ grace and kindness, but he did not know how he could ask that same grace of Sirius. It seemed unfair.

“Why?” Sirius asked. “Do you want me to change it?”

If Remus really wanted to change it, he could do it himself. He was only stalling, working up the courage to say what he needed to.

“It’s just that… Tonks said something interesting. She said that I’m allowed to have everything I want. It just sounded a lot like something you said to me last year.”

Remus could count on one hand the number of times he had seen Sirius blush. He bit down on his lip to restrain a smile as Sirius’ cheeks turned red.

“I didn’t put the idea in her head, if that’s what you’re getting at.”

“I just want to know if you and Tonks are… on the same page about it.”

Sirius looked away. His jaw worked as he gnawed on the inside of his cheek. “I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it.”

Sirius was a better liar than James and Harry, only because he had far more experience. But none of them were as practised as Remus.

If Sirius needed more time to think about it, that was alright with Remus. He had only had the last few hours to even consider the idea, and he wouldn’t mind considering it for a while longer.

The idea that Remus could have everything he wanted was a bit overwhelming. He knew that Tonks had not meant literally everything, but it was nice to imagine the possibilities of everything, of a perfectly healthy child, of James home safe, of Harry trusting them again, of the war ending —

He supposed that was the point, wasn’t it? That everyone else allowed themselves to imagine those things, so why couldn’t Remus? Why couldn’t he let himself want all of that and more?

The answer was easy enough: he was afraid. He was so afraid of disappointment that he avoided wanting altogether. He told himself that he did not want anything, that he did not deserve anything, simply because he was afraid of the moment he would find out he could not have what he wanted.

But he couldn’t lie to himself anymore. Remus wanted everything.

#remus lupin #nymphadora tonks #chiara lobosca #this one is for all the remadora fans the wolfstar fans and the hogwarts mystery fans #i see you all and love you all #hogwarts mystery is some of the best post canon content ever created btdubs #its so on point #rec me your best narratives for it before I feel compelled to write my own #dh

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awanderingdeal · 4 years

Text

Summer Camp AU - Chapter 3 - Leo

Sorry about the wait on this one! Our darling Leo will be taking us through this chapter.

CW: mentions of injury (minor)

Fic Rating: T

Please message me if you feel that any content warnings need to be added or the rating is not appropriate.

Thank you to my wonderful betas @bkfstclubmember and @fleetingpieces.

The characters in this fic belong to @lumosinlove and you should definitely go and check out her fics!

For previous and future chapters please see my masterlist

Leo had only been to summer camp once as a kid, and that had been back in middle school. It had escaped his memory how draining it was to meet so many new people, learn the layout of the site, and to keep track of all the rules he needed to remember. Between that, and the bruises littering his body from the evening of Dodgeball and Capture the Flag, Leo was exhausted. Happy, but exhausted.

Regulus hadn’t crept back into their cabin until the early hours of the morning and had declined coming to breakfast in favour of more sleep. It meant that Leo was alone when he set his breakfast tray down at an empty table. He was only able to savour the quiet for a couple of minutes though, before the chaos of camp caught up with him.

“Leo!” a boy said, startling Leo into looking up from his eggs. He recognised him from the game of dodgeball; he’d hit Leo square in the chest. Besides, it would have been difficult to forget that face. Cropped curls, a chiseled jawline and deep brown eyes. He’d cut his camp t-shirt into a low tank top. Leo noticed the scars, a slightly paler brown than the rest of his skin, peeking out through the oversized arm holes. He’d never seen anybody wear them so proudly before and it made him want to smile. Not only for the other boy, but for himself. Because if 13 year old Leo, heck if 17 year old Leo, had been told that one day he’d be in a place that would allow him to be authentically himself, and he’d be surrounded by others who understood what it was to be different, he never would have believed it.

“Morning,” Leo had to glance at the boy's badge; he was awful with names. “Thomas,” he said with a smile. He’d only said two words to the boy yesterday, but Thomas seemed like the type who would be friends with anybody that was willing.

“Call me Talker,” Thomas said, reaching out a hand for Leo to shake. “Please.”

“Morning, Talker,” Leo repeated with a laugh, shaking the hand before shovelling more eggs into his mouth.

Soon the table was full, and Leo found himself in a heated conversation about whether kindles were better than books. Somehow, that led to him lapping up James’ stories of previous camp disasters until Lily shoved her boyfriend and told him to stop scaring the rookie.

The chatter was interrupted by the static of a microphone. Everybody, including Leo, turned towards the source of the noise. A flustered looking young man stood over by the buffet table, clutching his hands around the microphone so hard that his knuckles were white. James cupped his hands around his mouth and hollered, “Go Loops!”

The man smiled and gave a nervous cough, but the encouragement seemed to work. “Hi everybody, I’m Remus Lupin. Most people just call me Loops though. My pronouns are he/him and I’ve been coming to this camp for the last two years. Clearly I didn’t suck too much, because they hired me as a medic this year,” he paused, his eyes searching the crowd. They landed on the man that Leo had met as Regulus’ brother the day before, and his smile grew wider. “I’m going to be leading the first aid training this morning, so if you could all be out at the pavilion in 15 minutes that would be fantastic...thanks.”

The room fell silent as Remus set the microphone back in its stand and walked off, receiving a pat on the shoulder from Dumo as he passed. The hall soon erupted with noise again as people finished up their food and made to follow the instructions they had been given.

“Alright! Let’s go save some lives,” Thomas boomed, downing the last of his glass of milk and grabbing his tray. He’d only taken two steps before he turned back around and flashed a grin at Leo. “Nutty! I forgot to say. Dumo asked us to film some promo TikToks and your beautiful face would be great in it. You in?”

Leo had no idea who ‘us’ was, but he’d promised himself to take every opportunity that this camp threw at him so he nodded, and gave a small, “Sure, why not?”

“Great, I’ll see you after dinner then,” Thomas said, walking off with a bounce in his step.

When Leo made his way to the pavilion, he was given a card with the number 1 on it by Remus. He didn’t know what it was for, but clutched it in his hand as he looked around for Regulus, hoping they had managed to wake up on time. He was relieved to set his eyes on them talking to June, a girl that Leo had met yesterday. She had been a bit intimidating, leaning against a tree, dressed in biker boots and a leather jacket that he later learnt had a bisexual flag stiched into back. However, she’d turned out to be extremely friendly and Leo relaxed knowing Regulus was in good hands.

“Okay! Listen up, folks,” Remus called out. “Each of you has been given a card with a number on it. There is one other person with the same number as you. Please find them, they are going to be your partner for today’s training session.”

Different people seemed to have different strategies for finding their partner. Some decided to stay where they were and just shout their numbers. Others darted around asking each individual what their number was. Leo didn’t need to use either to find his. With his first glance across the crowd, he settled his eyes on a person holding a card with the number one on it. With a triumphant smile, he weaved through the other counselors quickly so as not to lose sight of his partner.

“Hey, I’m Leo. I think you’re mine,” Leo introduced himself, glancing quickly at the nametag on Logan’s chest before looking up at his face again. The action had become almost habitual already.

Logan peered from under the brim of his hat. He had deep green eyes that Leo swore were looking into his soul as they swept over the length of his body. “Yeah, I suppose you are,” the boy said eventually. “My name’s Logan, but I guess you already know that. Pleased to meet you.”

“The pleasure is all mine,” Leo mumbled quietly under his breath. He had promised himself that he wasn’t going to do the cliched ‘summer camp romance’ thing. After all, he’d just gotten over the ‘closeted jock’ situation and that hadn’t been fun, to say the least. He wanted to be done with men for a very long time, but it didn’t hurt to look, right?

Before Logan could respond, Remus had gathered their attention again and they got swept away with learning how to recognise and assist the injuries and ailments that they were most likely to see over the coming weeks.

“Merde!” Logan gasped, pulling Leo from his thoughts. He figured that he had wound the bandage too tight around Logan’s arm.

“Sorry! Sorry,” he apologised, trying to remove it as quickly as he could. “Are you okay?”

Logan frowned for a second, “I am fine. Why would you ask that?”

“Was it not too tight?” Leo asked, gesturing to Logan’s arm, a little confused.

Logan’s features knitted into a tighter frown before he seemed to have a realisation. “Oh, non. That was fine. Perfect. I will never bleed to death with you around,” he said, gesturing for Leo to do the bandage again so that Remus could inspect his work.

“Okay…” Leo hesitated, “Why did you swear then?”

“You’re the angel,” Logan grinned, and Leo just grew more confused. Logan huffed out a laugh. “I believe you met my boyfriend yesterday. Tall...although, not as tall as you. Red hair. Bit of an idiot.”

“You mean Finn,” Leo smiled, remembering the boy from yesterday. “Wait. Did you say boyfriend?”

Leo had been one of the people allocated to defend his team's flag. His back was to it, but out of the corner of his eye, he could see the blue, white and pink stripes. Dumo had taken the opportunity to educate the counsellors on the flags of different identities before letting each team choose which would be theirs for the game. A timid looking blonde girl had whooped so loudly before her pale cheeks had turned crimson that it had been a unanimous decision for their team to take the trans flag.

It had been eerily quiet for a while when three people came crashing out of the trees. Leo recognised two of them; a Russian boy who had insisted everybody called him Kuny instead of butchering his name, and Jackson Nadeau. They were both on his team.The person they were chasing was not. Leo glanced to his right, checking that there was nobody coming from that direction before he tried to intercept the intruder. Leo had thought he was fast, but they had easily whipped past him and Leo was left watching them run. He didn’t have time to call out between seeing the rock and watching them fall flat on their face.

“Are you okay?” Leo shouted, forgetting the game as he ran over to check they hadn’t hurt themselves too badly. He was worried that they weren’t moving, but just as Leo kneeled down, they groaned and rolled onto their back.

“Shit,” Leo said, taking in the blood dripping down the pale skin. “Hey, I’m Leo. Can you tell me your name?” Leo asked, already knowing it was Finn from the name tag, but he wanted to check that the boy knew himself.

“Fi-Fish,” the red haired boy slurred, blinking rapidly. “Am I in heaven?” he asked, reaching up to cup Leo’s face.

“No, you’re at Camp Gryffindor. Not quite heaven, but pretty close,” Leo gave a nervous laugh. “Just stay still. We’re going to get somebody to help you.”

“You look like an angel to me,” Finn whispered, making Leo blush. He gave a little cough before looking up at Kuny and Jackson, who had joined him at Finn’s side. “Can one of you go and grab a medic, please?”

Leo had been meaning to check up on Finn. Both because he had been worried about him, but also because he hadn’t been able to get that red hair and those freckles out of mind all night. Finn was beautiful, of course he had a boyfriend.

“Yeah,” Logan nodded, his smile widening a second. “My boyfriend who apparently met an angel last night. He’s not wrong.”

Leo scratched at the back of his neck before continuing to wrap the bandage around Logan’s arm. “How is he?”

“He’s fine. He’ll have a headache for a few days, but Lupin fixed him up,” Logan reassured. He hummed and pulled at the grass with his unoccupied hand. “Wouldn’t shut up about the blue-eyed angel called Leo though. I tried to make him stay in bed today, but he insisted you were real. Seems you are.”

Leo thought his face was going to permanently take on its new shade of pink with the amount of blushing he was doing. “Isn’t it weird for you? Your boyfriend calling me an angel?”

Logan shrugged, “Non, he didn’t lose his eyesight just because we got into a relationship. Besides, I trust him.”

Thankfully, Remus chose that moment to join them, praising Leo’s work and making a few comments on how it could be made a little better. Once he had gone, Logan began to tell him about his life growing up in Canada as if the previous conversation had never happened. Leo wasn’t sure whether he was relieved or frustrated.

In return, Leo told Logan about the cooking classes that had led him to applying to work in the camp kitchens that summer. He found that Logan was actually a good listener, and nearly ended up spilling the details of the drama that led him to taking those classes as a replacement for the hockey games he was due to be playing. Another time maybe. Leo wasn’t going to think about how much he hoped there would be another time.

The rest of the morning session seemed to fly by after that, and soon Leo found himself saying goodbye to Logan in order to find Regulus for lunch.

“I’ll see you around,” Leo smiled.

“Sure thing, mon ange,” Logan said easily, and Leo tried not to read too much into that.

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anxiouslyfred · 3 years

Text

Painted Diving Gear

Summary: Remus is a diver and teaches it to tourists so of course occasionally some of the gear gets lost. That why his soulmate, genius that they must be, has learnt how to return the gear, designs painted onto the edge to claim it before losing them once more.

/\/\

The was a familiar oxygen tank sat in the middle of Remus's flat that morning.

Honestly it wouldn't be anything worth commenting on usually, except this particular tank had been lost a month prior, left behind on a hired van by accident. The company had claimed they couldn't locate it to return the item and from the painting on its edge that made a lot more sense now.

His soulmate must have received the gas tank at some point between him realising it was missing and contacting the company. Remus had been ecstatic the first time something he lost turned up back in his flat, just with a painting added onto the edge. It seemed the artwork was enough to swap ownership between them so far as whatever the magic moving objects between soulmates was concerned.

He didn't have much time to delay though, only just having gotten up in time to head to work. The tank was easily thrown into his trunk to take in with him and some ready roll icing was grabbed to eat as breakfast on the way in. Remus might not care for having breakfast but knew better than to dive with no energy, especially in the middle of the summer vacation period.

The Diving company was already open when he arrived, another of the team having opened up and started taking bookings for the day. The oxygen tank got a raised eyebrow when Remus brought it in.

“That soulmate of yours probably gets worried sick every time you loose one of those.” Janus offered but waved to the edge of the room.

They'd made something of a display of the equipment since it started coming back. Neither of them were sure what type of paint was used on the equipment or whether it was safe to be used in the oceans or not so erred on the side of caution. The last thing Remus wanted to do was accidentally harm the creatures and corals he dived down to see and show to tourists in small groups so unfortunately the scuba gear that got painted on and returned was just left to one side for the moment.

So far they had 4 oxygen tanks, various scuba masks and a few pairs of flippers all painted by whomever Remus's soulmate might be. The designs had started off as somewhat plain, simple swirls and patterns done over the front of them. Gradually, with each item returned the images grew more complex, from featuring ocean life, to spiders, until today's intricate design. The was an octopus wrapped around a pile of knives, most of which Remus could recognise as ones he'd lost throughout his life. It was almost as though his soulmate was attempting to paint an image of who they thought he was, and that idea thrilled him.

All Remus could tell about his soulmate was that they were a freaking genius who figured out how to return lost items when nobody was known to have managed that ever before.

“Nah, they don't. They wouldn't try returning to someone they think could have died losing an item.” Remus brushed the comment away, making sure the latest one was stood clear to see for any customers that walked in.

Janus was finally able to properly see the painting now it was down, smirking at the image. “And it seems like they even have a collection of knives to challenge your own. Must be a perfect match.”

“Once again wrong. That's my collection of knives. They just get to look after it for a while and it's even better than some of those rusting at the bottom of the ocean too.” Remus corrected, snatching their bookings diary from the counter to check if they'd be taking walk in customers today or if something particular needed setting up on the boat.

“Of course you lose more knives than you manage to keep, how could I be so misguided?” The sarcasm rolled thickly through the reply. “Does that mean they presume you are an octopus rather than a human then?”

Remus cackled, thrilled at the suggestion. “I wish I was. Those lovely babies are so brilliant, shame today's a boring day so I probably won't get to see any.”

“You never know, the next walk in could be an avid diver needing to rent equipment and get shown the most interesting places to dive.” Janus suggested, a wobble of his head betraying how outlandish he thought the idea was.

Remus just snickered, heading through to where the boat was moored so he could check everything was prepped for use.

The walk-in customer they did have unfortunately wasn't an avid diver when Janus called him back through to the shop, but a tourist hoping to learn something about diving because of something to do with their soulmate. The reason had come out in a mumble just as Remus got through so he didn't quite catch it.

“I can do that. There's some shallows in a quiet cove just around the coast I can teach you in. Come through and I'll get you set up with the gear in your size before we head out.” Remus had already walked through into the other room, expecting the man to finish staring at their displays and follow.

A few minutes later he was still alone and Janus poked his head through the door. “Your display of returned items seems to have broken our customer. Come and fix it!” With the order given he'd returned back to the counter.

Once Remus was back in the front of the shop the man was still gaping at the items, reaching out to follow the lines of the knives on the one brought in today. “Yeah, that's some pretty awesome artwork. My soulmate does it so they can return them to me, but since I don't know what paint was used we've been avoiding using them where possible.” He commented, resting his head on top of the customers trying to get their attention.

“I'd be a fucking idiot if I figured out how to return them and didn't also do research on what paints are used on diving equipment, or can remain in tact under the pressure and salt water of the ocean.” Came a snapped back reply. “Are you seriously trying to tell me that the first time I try to learn something about my soulmate I end up in your freaking shop?”

Remus stepped back just enough the guy could turn around, tilting his head. “Well if you're the one who painted them, I guess I am. Let's get you some permanent gear so I can properly teach you how to dive over the rest of the week, or however long you're in the area.”

“Well if this gets mentioned to the friends that dragged me on this holiday that might just be permanently. What's your name anyway, or should I just call you Knifapus?” The man asked, looking Remus up and down.

There was a snicker from the counter but Remus ignored it, shimmying a little. “You can call me anything you like, Spidat, but my name is Remus.” A number of the items his soulmate had actually lost had spiders and bats on them and most were dark despite the fluffy nature a lot of them shared; the nickname had come from a year where any words Remus could combine would be mixed.

“Let's stick with Virgil or something that uses real words, shall we? Are you serious about getting me permanent diving gear, cause I don't think I can afford that?” Virgil corrected, glancing over at one of the displays of the gear they had for sale.

“Soulmate privileges.” Janus called over. “It can come out of the company funds, but only if you actually are going to use it for more than a couple of days.”

There had never been a policy like that in the company before and Janus had actually insisted to his soulmate he couldn't give them a discount for the gear just to enable them dragging him out on the sea. Remus wasn't going to argue though. Diving had always been a way for him to share his darker thoughts without people giving him concerned looks, but it had been Janus's escape to isolate and calm down for years.

“And here, I was just hoping one of those soulmate privileges would be getting to use the equipment I so painstakingly returned.” Virgil's whine was exaggerated, but the twist of his lips and quirked eyebrows showed how entertained he was by the idea. “Honestly though, I have no clue if I'm going to join you diving much. Isn't it terrifying to get that deep underwater with no way to breathe if the oxygen tank comes loose or something?”

“I taunt death daily and he's yet to do more than wave while clearing up the devastation humanity is sending to the oceans.” Remus insisted, excited to share the experience.

Virgil groaned. “Damnit, am I going to have to play, 'Let's not die today' with you too? It's bad enough with friends running into busy roads because there's a dog on the other side.”

“You're the one that came looking for him, otherwise I'd sympathise.” Janus snickered.

“Let's try a small dive today and see if you could work up to coming on the deeper dives in a few years time.” Remus compromised, still bouncing between his feet and reaching forwards to tug on Virgil's arm.

“That we can do, I guess.”

#remus sanders #virgil sanders #Janus Sanders #dukexiety #platonic dukeceit #diving

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cotncandyboifics · 3 years

Text

The Bidding of the Prince Twins: Chapter 1

AO3 Link

Masterpost

Chapter 2 ~

Pairings: (vague/qpr) Loceit, eventual Analoceit

Word count: 2,977

Story summary: Virgil finds himself being held hostage in an unknown location. His two suspected captors seem to care for him more than any strangers should, especially strangers who kidnapped him. But were they really the ones who kidnapped him? That aside, Virgil also can't shake the feeling that there's something familiar about them. He just can't pin-point what it is. As time passes, the layers of lies the three of them are caught in are gradually peeled away, one by one.

General CW: U!Roman, U!Remus, food, kidnapping, implied Stockholm Syndrome, moderate to severe amnesia, swearing, sexual innuendos, graphic descriptions of gore/violence/scarring, minor character d-aths, anxiety attacks, panic attacks, non-graphic descriptions of needles (will be added to as I write more)

Chapter CW: food mentioned, minor amnesia, kidnapping hostage, swearing, non-graphic description of anxiety attack, non-graphic description of a needle (let me know if i missed anything please!)

Author Notes: <none>

...

Virgil winced, squinting sharply as a blinding white light was trained on his face. A giant light getting forced into someone's face would be jarring under any circumstances, but it was especially so considering he had previously been engulfed in an almost equally jarring darkness. He'd also just awoken from an unexpected stint of disorienting unconsciousness.

He felt a presence behind the light, and the edges of hair tufts caught bits of light from behind the cone of death that was focused on him. The figure was clearly tall, and though Virgil was seated, he could easily tell that if he weren't, this person would probably be a head taller than him at the very least. He tried to twist his wrists in the several zip-ties that had them bound together behind his back, as well as to a rod running up the center of the back of his chair. He clenched his jaw, looking down as the light sent a shock-wave of pain through his eyes.

"Virgil Black." A stern monotone voice came from where he'd seen the shiny bits of hair before. It's familiarity wasn't striking, but it had a relatively calming effect on Virgil's nerves, so his mind didn't feel the need to follow that train of thought.

"That's me, man," He tried, voice coming out slightly hoarse. "Mind explaining why the fuck you've got me tied up in this interrogation basement? Last I checked I'm not involved in any CIA bullshit," He sneered. Suddenly, he heard the sound of someone pushing a chair out and standing sounded somewhere to his right, behind the first figure. Someone else was there too. A step or two sounded as the second entity vaguely came toward Virgil. Great, two assholes to shake off.

"Very funny." A deeper voice came, much snarkier than the first. Virgil felt his spine tingle. This voice was oddly familiar as well, but he was still too out of sorts to try and figure out why.

"I apologize for the unsavory conditions, but it is imperative that our identities be kept classified for the time being. All we need is a minute amount of information, and we will be on our way." The first voice again. A very small clacking sound of plastic came from near the figure's face.

"Imperative to what?" Virgil hissed between clenched teeth, looking back up at the mysterious person. This time, he was able to pick out another feature; the light also caught what appeared to be the rim and lens of a pair of square prescription glasses. That explained the plastic clacking, he guessed. Virgil doubted they could be any other sort of glasses; it's possible that this person was a constantly-wearing-sunglasses type, but based on his brief time interacting with them, Virgil didn't really buy that. As well, some part of his intuition told him they were most certainly prescription, the same part that had noted the familiarity of both voices.

"That will also have to remain classified for now. But enough." The voice grew firm. Virgil tried to keep himself from swallowing audibly. "What are the most recent events that you remember, Virgil?"

He tried to think. "Well it's awful hard to recall anything with that giant light in my face, so can I have a minute to think? On top of that my memory is shit anyway because of my anxiety. Is that cool with you, thing 1 and thing 2?" A scoff came from Thing 2, seemingly off in the corner. Virgil hoped the half-hearted remark would keep them entertained as he tried twisting his ankles. They were tightly and securely duct taped to the legs of his chair, which was slowly cutting off his circulation. He felt his toes starting to grow cold and tingly. That meant he'd only been secured like this for a short amount of time, a couple minutes at most.

"By all means. Take your time." Still the first figure's voice, dripping with sincerity. Virgil detected what seemed to be a hint of remorse in their voice, as if they genuinely felt sorry, or at least uncomfortable with what they were doing. Virgil wondered why the second person was so evasive. He figured he'd try to provoke them into speaking again soon.

But for now, he had to think. What was the last thing he remembered? Before a throbbing headache, before the pitch black, before the sound of heavy rusty doors whining open and closed, and two sets of footsteps approaching him. He hadn't really registered them at the time; he'd been too disoriented, he guessed from some sort of anesthetic.

He tried to think back further. He pulled basic facts from his mind, hoping to jog his memory. He lived in New York, in a one-bedroom apartment with his roommate and best friend Patton. They'd fit two twin beds in their little bedroom. They were both Seniors at NYU. That started things off, at least. He spent a lingering moment recalling the cat they both took care of together. Her name was Natalie, and she was pitch black, each and every hair on her body a rich raven shade.

He knew Patton had planned to have a little get-together with some Psych major friends he had, and encouraged Virgil to bring some of his Techie buddies. They'd gone shopping for snacks last night.

He figured he'd start with that.

"Well, I remember Tuesday night for sure. Me and my roommate went grocery shopping. Getting snacks for a little get-together we were having. Not my idea, of course. I'm not a huge fan of parties, or-"

"We asked for your most recent memories, not your life story," drawled the second voice. Virgil smirked behind his bangs. "Will you get on with it already? Unless Tuesday night is really your most recent memory."

"As much as your- contributions - are appreciated, J, I am conducting this interrogation, and I'd prefer if you'd keep your snide comments to yourself for at least the first session," The first voice came again, hushed and sounding strained. Virgil clung to what little information he got from the comment. The second voice belonged to someone who could be identified as "J" apparently, and this was the first... session? Virgil had to set his mental notes aside for the time being though, since he had evidently not yet produced an adequate response. "My apologies, Virgil. My colleague is... rather, anxious, to... move things along. You may continue."

"No sweat. Sounds like J just needs a bit of a chill pill." Virgil smirked in the general direction he'd heard J's voice coming from. He was met with an almost disturbing silence. As expected. "Anyway. I remember shopping, and heading home, and... eventually sleeping. Ah, I guess I woke up a little late Wednesday morning, because I was rushing around and shit. My roommate looked kinda worried about it, but that's just how he is." Virgil paused for a moment. He wondered if these two mysterious figures knew about Patton and NYU and where he lived and everything, and considering he knew nothing about them or what they wanted from him, he wouldn't have been surprised. Regardless, he figured it would be best to keep things as anonymous as possible for the time being. "...Hmm. Then I think I rushed onto the bus. I think I caught it just before it was leaving. I got to, where I was going, and did what I was meaning to do, and then... I guess I headed home? I remember the thing I had to do, and finishing it, but... after that things get kinda foggy. I dunno." He paused again. A beat of silence. "Then again, I'll probably remember more in a few minutes. Especially if I'm not being literally slowly blinded." He finished, looking up at the figure behind the light with as large eyes as he could manage. The figure cleared their throat.

"Thank you Virgil. As well, there is no need for anonymity. We are fully aware of your roommate Patton, and the Economics lecture you nearly missed on Wednesday. However, your attempt at omission was... if nothing else, entertaining." Virgil scoffed under his breath. Even if his anxiety had predicted this just moments before, he was getting really freaked out now. It's never the same at all, imagining worst case scenarios and actually living them. The initial shock of this whole situation was wearing off, giving way to panic.

"At this time, in return all I can offer you is this. You are aware of the second man in your presence, I'm sure. For now you will know him as J, as you clearly caught on to rather quickly."

"He loves the witty ones," J's voice came this time directly from Virgil's left, and much closer than before. It took all of Virgil's self control not to flinch away. "So you'll entertain him well. He's L, by the way."

L cleared his throat. "Yes, thank you J. I shall be addressed as L. You will likely only see both of us at once. Perhaps on rare occasions we will each come in alone, but J and I are partnered, so that would likely do little more than impair our... performance."

"Partnered? Performance? What am I, a high school science project?" Virgil snickered bitterly. "My wrists are starting to hurt pretty fucking bad. This is pretty sketchy, L. I didn't fucking do anything wrong. Why am I here?" Virgil tried not to let the shrill breathiness overtake his voice too much, but the anxiety rising in his chest was far from merciful. He tried to calm himself internally, but that wasn't exactly working out.

"I can understand your frustrations," L replied, and the glint of his glasses shifted, the small plastic clacking sound coming again with it. Virgil realized it was just L adjusting his glasses, likely out of habit. "But, for your safety, I cannot give you a direct answer to any of those questions yet. Ah, except; no, you are not a high school science project." Virgil could practically taste the smirk on L's face. He wanted to spit at him. He wanted to tear himself out of the fucking zip ties and duct tape. He felt his heart pounding in his chest.

"Listen, I get that you two are having a jolly good time fucking me up, but I'm," Virgil struggled, each word becoming harder to force out of his trembling mouth, "I'm kinda freaking out here." He hated the way his voice cracked then.

Virgil could see the glint of L's glasses shifting again, the tall man turning to look at his sarcastic counterpart. A short nod, and with a small clicking sound, the light was shut off.

Somehow, the room seemed darker than it had before. The change was so disorienting that Virgil couldn't pinpoint just where the sounds of shuffling of feet around him were coming from or going. No screeching metal door sounds came though, so he knew J and L had to be in the room with him still. His breathing was becoming very labored, and it overwhelmed him as the only sound he could hear. God, how he hated anxiety attacks.

"Virgil." J's voice came from directly in front of him - J was likely crouched to be on Virgil's level - and it was uncharacteristically silky smooth. He flinched that time, but was able to keep himself from hissing. He was only sure it was J's because of its specific inflections; there was no way this could be L, and there was certainly no fourth person in the room (he hoped). "I understand you are very disoriented right now, but the last thing we want to do is cause you an anxiety attack. My sincerest apologies for triggering the beginning of one. That aside, I need you to focus on your breathing. Nothing but your breaths and the sound of my voice."

His voice felt like butter melting, gliding across a hot pan and leaving a silky trail. Or maybe like warm honey running down flushed skin. Virgil was captivated, and thank fuck, because if it weren't for Fuck Face #2 over here, he doubted he would have been able to get out of this one so easily. So he focused, focused hard on the labored breaths he was huffing.

"Now, I need you to try to slow down. Just a little bit. Slow down for me. Feel the air filling and retreating in your lungs. Let it stay a little longer. Then, let it leave in a gentle skip instead of a frantic sprint." God, if Virgil wasn't Fucking Freaking Out right now, he'd probably be trying to flirt with Mr. Butter-tongue, considering the shivers going up his spine weren't only thanks to his panic disorder.

Gradually, he managed to slow down. It wasn't a straight path, but eventually he got there. J continued cooing sweet nothings to him as he came down before any sort of climax. He thanked the darkness for hiding his horridly hot face from his captors. He heard a slight creasing of fabric.

"All better?" J's smile was practically visible with the way he almost sweetly sneered those words. His voice came from higher up, so Virgil knew he must've stood once again. He just scoffed in a half-assed cover up.

"Sure, Fuck Face Number two." He tried rocking himself side to side in his chair, but it seemed to be attached to the floor. He groaned.

J tsked a few times. "Is that any way to talk to someone who just kept you from what would surely have been a horridly exhausting anxiety attack? Honestly. You ought to be more grateful, Virgil." Virgil was beginning to passionately hate the way J talked; so sassy and drawly, as if he thought he was some serious hot stuff. Virgil wanted to smack him something awful.

He heard soft receding footsteps, feeling J's presence recoil.

"So how does this work? Is someone gonna have to whip out my dick for me when I have to pee?" Virgil prodded at the void around him.

"Very funny, Virgil. No, you will soon be... enlightened, regarding your temporary living situation, so to speak." L's voice came again, finally, from slightly to the right. It was a lot less variant in tone than J's, and Virgil greatly appreciated the constancy.

He couldn't respond soon enough; he felt something pierce his skin on his left outer thigh. Warm breath teasing at skin behind his left ear was the last thing he remembered. "Go to sleep, V. We'll see you again very soon."

"Night night, J," He whispered, before the lights really went out.

...

Logan sighed, shrugging off his navy pinstriped suit jacket as he shut the door behind him. He held it by the collar in one hand, turning to survey the disheveled mess that the observation room had become over such a short period of time.

Piles and piles of paper were stacked high on the wall-to-wall desk, and stacked higher on the floor. The interrogation light - just an industrial Flashlight with a cone of metal wrapped around it's end to amplify it - had been discarded lazily in one corner. Janus was seated at said desk, slouched over himself on a fold-out metal chair, resting his chin on his palm as he looked out through the false mirror at a peacefully sleeping Virgil.

His hat was resting on a corner of the back of his chair, along with his gold-encrusted swallowtail coat. He looked a bit of a mess. His hair was fraying and splaying everywhere. His eyes looked tired, even if Logan could only see his one blind eye from this angle. The jagged scars that crept up his neck and covered the side of his face seemed paler than usual.

"Are you okay, Janus?" Logan inquired as neutrally as he could manage, sitting beside his friend.

Janus merely side-eyed Logan, in his all-knowing way. "I think you and I both know the answer to that question."

"Look, I know this method is-- well, disconcerting," Logan's words rushed out of his mouth as if they were being chased, "but we do not have another choice right now. We will get this over with soon... we will find a way to get through this." Logan cleared his throat and fidgeted with his tie. Janus considered rolling his eyes and responding snidely, but he knew Logan wasn't taking kindly to these new... circumstances either.

"We will." He settled on an attempt to be reassuring. Janus had always been good at that, or at least he'd been told so. He only wished it worked on himself too, especially now. Logan offered a small smile.

A long silence overtook them. They both simply sat side by side and observed their unconscious hostage. He was sprawled rather inelegantly across a deep grey satin bed, one arm wrapped in a death grip around a plush pillow. His leg stuck out haphazardly over the edge of the bed, and his hair was in worse shape than Janus' - which was saying something, since Janus' hair was notoriously wavy and curly and constantly out of sorts, while Virgil's was just straight. His mouth was slacked open, but he didn't snore. His eyebags were somehow visible under his black eyeshadow.

Logan broke the silence first. This normally would have dismayed Janus, but again, these were... unusual circumstances. "Well, he seems figuratively out cold for the time being. Shall we seek out some sustenance?" Logan shrugged his suit jacket back on. Janus didn't move a muscle.

"I'm not hungry right now. You go ahead, I'll make sure he doesn't wake up and start tearing out his hair or something." Janus' somber tone stole his voice's usual sarcasm. Logan rested a hand on his shoulder with a great softness.

"I'll grab you a little something. Try not to stress yourself out too much." With that, Logan set a water bottle on the desk beside Janus' elbow and left in near silence.

Janus heard a faint receding clicking as Logan walked away down the hall.

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littlemessyjessi · 4 years

Text

How They’d Be As Mukbangers: Harry Potter Characters

How They'd Be As YouTube Mukbangers

James: Every video has a theme. Like, I'm not even playing. Holidays? All kinda of holiday themed food. Quidditch World Cup coming up? Things inspired by the country of his favorite team. Just a random day? Everything is blue. He's that type of way.

Sirius: If a mukbanger was a thirst trap. I could easily see him really getting into. Dark background, black gloves, aesthetic as fuck and like, he doesn't even talk. He just sits there, looks hot and somehow makes eating looking incredibly sexy. And he fucking knows it. Bitch also one hundred percent rolls his eyes back when it hits his taste buds. Licks his lips and his fingers. Takes way too big of bites. Most people would say it's cringy how sexual his videos are...but everyone is secret subscribed anyway. With notifications on.

Remus: This goes one of two ways. If he's in a good mood and things are chill, he'll find a recipe, make it to the mother fucking 't' and then have a little mukbang slash review on said recipe. Nice lil chat. Sweet tol bean. Precious. If it's near the full moon there ain't none of that. Ya boy, brings in his monstrous plate of food, sits it down and just tears into like a fucking beast, no talking. Just nom nom nom. Unintentionally thirst traps and people opening talk about when Remus goes beast mode.

Peter: Candy and sweets channel! Small mukbangs with reviews from different candies from Honeydukes!

Lily: Lol, Lilypad. She ain't playing around. Her videos are planned out, edited and just generally finessed to perfection. Even had music added to it with tiny vlog segments as it's set up. It's a little pretentious but she does have a good following.

Marlene: This bitch. Fucking competitive eating queen. Tiny ass lil ho can eat you under the table, bro. Think RainaIsCrazy on YouTube. She can fucking smash. Usually does eating challenges from different resteraunts and competitions. Often, challenges Remus on his wild days. He's a beast but she still wipes the floor with him.

Dorcas: The collab. Dorcas always has good food and good company. She's all about sharing a meal with someone and talking about random things.

Alice and Frank: The couple channel. It's generally filled with so much fucking cute and the food is always tasty. It's sickening they feed each other but you also can't help but awww.

Molly Prewett/Weasley: Family recipes. Molly's channel are tried and true recipes from the Prewett family. Cook with me and tons of kitchen life hacks. Also, that woman can turn a ham sandwhich into a full course meal. Bet. Always taste tested by Daddy Weasley. Yes, I said Daddy Weasley.

Lucius Malfoy: The most pretentious fucking channel to ever exist. It's a whole fucking production that admittedly he does put a lot of work into. Somewhat thirst trappy like Sirius' but instead of just having a plain black background he goes out of his way to shove as much of his manor into. Only eats the most expensive food fucking on the planet and of course, it's prepared by House elves cause he's a twit. (Yes, I know this is Thranduil but honestly wouldn’t put it past Lucius to be this fucking pretentious.)

Severus Snape: Actually pretty solid content. His exquisite skills in potions actually made him a rather good chef. Tasteful shots, edited well with music over everything and subtitles. Simply audio for the eat portion at the end. Nothing too fancy for the background. Often just a very clean kitchen. Solid content though.

The Black Sisters: Mass chaos. Part vlog, part drama channel, half the time the food never even gets finished because of fights.

Bill Weasley: The Traveler. A lot of egyptian food. Some made by hand. Some vlogs from street food while he's out just generally doing his job. Short videos but solid. He's hot and he picks good food. It works for him.

Charlie Weasley: This extra ass bitch. He's the bitch that does all that outdoor cooking. You know what I mean. Shots in the woods, roaring fire. Lit by a precious dragon child no doubt. Dragons lounging in the background like those bitches who always have their dogs there. Yes, I'm jealous. Close up shots of him cutting things on a custom wood cutting board. Everything he makes causes your mouth to water. God damn, scarred, freckle faced bastard just gobbles it up and ends every fucking video with a wink. Charlie Weasley is the ultimate thirst trap and he fucking knows it.

Percy: Percy's channel could be epic but instead is boring as fuck. Why? Because he insist on having the most snooze worthy meals that are 'sensible' and THEN he proceeds to talk about politics. He actually had a pretty decent following of other like minded individuals but my god- politics and porridge, Percy? Really?

However, once he chills the fuck out, leaves the ministry to do something else - it’s a game changer. Brings the family on for mukbangs. Does videos with mummy weasley. Percy grows his hair out and Bill teases him for being a copy cat. Much better. Still talks politics but it’s fucking hiliarous and now the food is poppin.

Fred and George: Alright, this shit right here. Every fucking bit of it is a self promo for the shop. Meals inspired by and that would go well paired with 'this product'. Like, that's the whole thing. And then they run an add for their shop at the end featuring the product. It works for them because they're smart, they're hot and they're also wildly entertaining with their constantly sibling squabbling. But yeah. Big promo for the shop.

Ron Weasley: Honestly, out of everyone. Ron probably has the most followers and it's because he doesn't say shit while he's eating. He sits down with a massive fucking turkey. Nods at the camera and just tears it up. It's literally so satisfying. All the food is prepared by his mother. So it's obviously fantastic. ( I just had to use this gif.)

Ginny: Gin's channel is usually team building videos with the Harpies. 'Cheat Day: Vlog and Mukbang w/the Harpies' type of vibes. It's cool though and since it's a famous quidditch team the fans enjoy the behind the scenes action and actually drop all kinds of recipes for them to try in the future.

Hermione: Hermione could easily veer off into Percy's channel of misery when she gets started on her rants but mostly they're really chill videos. Mukbang and Book Review type of vibe. Or sometimes even the playing of an audio book while she does her thing. All in all, wholesome.

Harry: Lol, I swear. Fucking awkward bean. Harry's videos are literally of him making the simplest of things and being so fucking awkward. "Er, well, hi guys. So I'm about to head out for work. Running a bit late. But we're having a bit of toast and jam." Like it's literally just little videos of him eating whatever throughout the day. But of course, since he's Harry Fucking Potter- his follower count is astronomical.

Neville: Now, this boy. This boy is a goblincore gobbo's wet dream. Gardening videos with homegrown veg. Recipes from Grandmother. Have a nice Veggie Pot Pie with Professor Longbottom in the Hogwarts Greenhouse. There is a fanbase and it is huge.

Luna: Honestly, the weirdest fucking channel in the world. Like she finds the weirdest things to eat and goes from there. But Luna is bae so it's cool. Also, a thousand percent does Smoke Sesh + Mukbang videos. You know it's true.

Dean and Seamus: Literally, eating in the most crowded pubs as they visit football games around the country. Seamus will definitely pull the Irish card from time to time to have a drinking competition. He wins everytime. He may be a little dude but shit- homie can hold his own.

Cedric: Honestly, it's so fucking pure. Straight up did videos during his time at Hogwarts in the Hogwarts kitchen. Such kind little conversations with the house elves. "Hey, guys. Thanks for coming back to another video. Today we're making some really tasty biscuits. Whispy, one of the talented bakers here in the kitchens, is here to help us today so please say hello to her in the comments." He'll also always make extra and leave them in the Hufflepuff common room for everyone to enjoy. Like, it's honestly so pure and he's such a soft boi and oh my fucking geeeeeeerrrrrrdddd!!!!!

Draco: Actually takes it really seriously and put a lot of hard work into it. Nothing like his father's ego-tistical recipes. Surprisingly, every. single. recipe. is a muggle recipe. How would he know? Because he cross referenced with Granger of course. Cooks it himself. No magic. Lots of random talks. Just like a monologue of things and it gets kinda deep sometimes. Like, it's the channel to go to when you need advice that you didn't even know that you needed. Still eats incredibly proper. It's that pureblood raising of his. Old habits die hard.

Tonks: Pure chaos. "Hey, today we're having Mum's homemade lasagna and I'm also getting a new tattoo. Might dye my hair. Don't really need to since I can do this but whatever. So yeah, there's that. Like it's just all over the place and you'd think it would take but the chaos is too good not to watch. Literally gives herself beaks and snouts while she eats. It's iconic.

Dumbledore: Mother fucker just sits at his desk, stares straight into the camera and eats a lemon drop. Like a weirdo. The video usually no more than a minute and each video is just some variation of that. Meme lord.

Hagrid: Tea With Hagrid. Also, so the recipes suck, they too, but Hagrid is a peach and it's relaxing to see his gentle half giant there in his hut, pumpkin patch out the window and Fang laying by the fire. It's a mood and he's just like the comforting Dad figure.

McGonagall: Honestly the best one in the entire world. She makes a full course traditional Scottish breakfast... and then transforms into her animagus the cat...and promptly knocks it off the table. A fucking legend.

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