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#I’ve been to two weddings in my entire life
emeraldbabygirl · 1 year
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I blame Na Dokhyun the former member of History for these very sappy romantical marriage thoughts. Cause I’m constantly judging male idols for getting their girlfriend pregnant and then deciding to get married yet that’s what I write about. It’s either stated or implied that all my smut are with a boyfriend, I’ve never written any smut where the idol is your husband.
Like for me personally, maybe I’m just too old school and think this is the way it should be, instead of jumping right into the marriage after the baby after only like 3 years of a relationship (as an example) I would want to date that person for way longer than a few years because if I’m wanting to get married I want to be absolutely positive that the person I’m dating is the one I want to marry. I don’t want to marry and then 3 months down the road decide it’s not working. Plus if I’m planning on having children I need to get used to marriage life first and want to settle down with that person before I start thinking by about getting invested in a kid. I do not want to just have a kid and then like some people break off the relationship of divorce and then I’m tied to that kid and the man can just go off and do whatever without paying child support.
Maybe I’ve just been around bad relationships and assume the guy with always leave or the relationship won’t work out, like, a prime example being my parents relationship which is the reason why I told myself I never wanted in a relationship in the first place cause I was afraid I’d get involved with someone like my father and end up the same way. Another thing I do is when idols get married and have kids and then they divorce and the wife sometimes is stuck with everything and I just assume that’s how it could be for me like, every relationship is different and as far as idols there are some good marriages and such like I think Rain and Chen are doing great (even tho I don’t agree in getting pregnant before marriage hell I wouldn’t even be comfortable having sex until after marriage but I’m just old school I guess) anyway like there have been 3 idol marriages I know of that just didn’t end up well and I don’t want that but sometimes I get that “baby fever” or the “marriage feelies” and I just want that. Like I believe I’m too young rn to get married and have kids, the whole she-bang but woman don’t have a long ass time to wait before their internal clocks stop ticking.
Like I always told my mum I’d never be in a relationship, I’ll never get married, “I’m sorry I can’t give you grandchildren.” And I think she’ll probably die knowing that. But what if I decide later on down the road I want to starting dating and that leads to eventually getting married and having a child like my mum will die thinking I never wanted that. Like, I really really try not to think about these marriage and other life thoughts cause I get pretty upset I mean I watched this episode of a show centered around a wedding and all three times I saw the episode I just cried. Like I don’t have a father to walk me down the aisle, I don’t have a father for the father daughter dance (if that’s even really a thing) and now it’s like if I don’t get into a relationship and get married and pop out children in the next couple months to a year I’m afraid my mum will never know whether I did or not. I’m afraid she’s die before I even get in a relationship, she won’t see my boyfriend or to her horror my girlfriend or whoever it may be Idk, she won’t be at my wedding she won’t see the new house I move into with my husband she won’t be there for my baby shower or anything leading up to the north of my offspring and she won’t see my child or get to hold her grandchild.
And I know it upsets her cause she hoped for grandchildren and her sister has like 4 and she’s jealous and I feel bad cause I want my mum to be happy and get to hold a child and she wants the bloodline to continue but damn to the bloodline really end with me and my siblings. I’m afraid she’s just not going to be around by the time I decide to do this stuff if I really want to. Or if she is she won’t be able to see my bf or the wedding of the grandchildren cause she’ll be completely blind. Ugh! Idk I want to cry :( sometimes I want to be in a relationship and I want to have a cute wedding and I want my mum to cry at my wedding and I want the whole “something old something blue something borrowed something new” OR WHATEVER THE HELL IT IS and I want the whole the groom can’t see the bride til the wedding and bridesmaids and all that stuff that goes into a wedding but I feel most of the time that because of everything that’s happened in my life and the way I act and talk about men irl that it’s just not for me and I should push every relationship/marriage/child bearing thought out of my head :(
Ugh I’m done rambling thanks Dokhyun for those unwanted sappy and gross thoughts
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steviescrystals · 1 month
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there is no feeling worse in the world than missing your grandma :/
#she died two months before my eighth birthday#and every time i realize i’ve lived well over half my life without her i go a little bit insane bc that just doesn’t feel right#like soooo many of my favorite memories are with her how is it possible she was only in my life for less than eight years#my grandpas on both sides died before i was born so all i’ve ever had is my grandmas#and there’s also the horrible guilt i feel all the time knowing my other grandma is still alive but i rarely ever see her#but when i was a kid she lived an hour and a half away from us and this grandma lived around the corner#so we saw her all the time and every christmas fourth of july etc that whole side of my extended family would all go to her house#she moved into that house when my mom was 2 years old and lived there for the rest of her life so 40 years#and when she went into hospice care her one request was to die in that house surrounded by her kids and grandkids so that’s what happened#my parents bought the house after she died but we lived there for less than 2 years before moving to arizona#they’re both from colorado but they met in arizona and me and my sisters were born here#and the main reason we moved back to colorado in the first place was to be near her#but when we moved again my parents sold the house to our neighbors who had two daughters that my sisters and i grew up with#and they’re still our family friends to this day and we used to go on trips to national parks together every summer#we didn’t see them for maybe five years but then two summers ago their older daughter got married and we went to her wedding#which got us talking about how long it had been since our last trip so we went on another one last summer#this has turned into a tangent but it just makes me so happy that they’re still in our lives#and this great family we’ve known almost my entire life is living in my grandma’s house#she had a pool in her backyard which is super common here in az but not so much in colorado#and she let us invite these girls over all the time to swim so they grew up spending almost as much time in that house as we did#last time we were in colorado we went to have dinner with them and swim and it was like being transported back to my childhood#that house is just so special to me and i felt so blessed to be able to go back there since this family bought it instead of strangers#in a perfect world everything would align in a way that would let me buy it when i’m older and have my own family there#i’ve never had a strong attachment to any other house we’ve lived in but that one will always be my grandma’s house in my mind#i just love and miss her so much she was the most amazing grandma i ever could have asked for#my mom still has a lot of her childhood friends on facebook and whenever she would post pictures of me and my sisters as kids#everyone would comment that i looked exactly like my grandma did when she was a kid and that makes me so so happy#anyway. idk. i just miss her sm she was an angel and i’m so happy she was such a big part of my childhood#lj.txt
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fairene · 7 days
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one of your girls / ln4
part one
lando norris x fem!reader
reader uses she/her pronouns, no use of y/n.
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you are just one of his girls. a frequent regular. but something changes, and you are his favorite.
a/n ⋯ how do i explain myself...? guess i can't! this will be divided into two parts for the sake of dramatics, and truthfully i can't contain my excitement to share this with you all. reader's dresses are left to be ambiguous for your imagination, only the cut of the dress is described (perhaps a color, once, but i forget); as usual, it is always up to YOU what you are wearing;) i will be focusing on requests before the next part comes out!
inspiration ⋯ VIDEO
warnings ⋯ SMUT / 18++ minors DNI!!! language, drunk hookup, choking (slight), oral(m!receiving), unprotected p in v (wrap before you tap!), fingering!(f)receiving, overstimulation, feral lando. sickeningly in love lando, but not here; non monogamous (yet), insecure reader.
wc ⋯11.3k (unedited.)
your phone rang in from your bag, the vibration shocking you from your conference room in new york. you had been visiting there for your job, meeting with clients, and overall needing to schmooze the entire fucking office. you were sick of it at this point. 
and it was sunday, too. who works on a fucking sunday? you. because what’s life without the overtime pay? 
until you saw lando’s contact card lighting up your screen. you blushed, instantly, thinking of just how a week ago he had you laid out on his monaco penthouse, screaming and weeping his name while he fucked you rabidly. 
you answered, clearing your throat. 
“hello?” 
“i won! i won!” he shouted, the background noise of crowds drowning out the baritone of his voice. you raised a brow, but were quick to connect the dots. you’d been so busy with work that you’d forgotten that the race must’ve been over, you were only able to watch the beginning before you were swooped up into a meeting. 
your hand flew to cover your mouth as you stepped into your office, shutting the door. you couldn’t be loud, and tears began to welt in your eyes. “did you really?” 
“yes, yes! god, i’ve wanted this so bad…” he was absolutely full of rile and cheer. you could hear that from his voice clear as day. you were so happy for him. you wiped a stray tear that fell down your face and rolled to your chin. 
“i’m so happy for you, lan.” you breathed, laughing when your voice hitched with emotion. you knew that he caught it, letting out his own gasp at your retention. 
“you cryin’ for me?” he said your name, know damn well he had a cheeky smirk on his face. you scoffed, rolling your eyes and even he could hear the action. 
“shut up. let me be happy for you.” he laughed again, deep and rich, but relieved that you picked up the phone. it was hard for him to get your attention, though you felt vice versa. 
“let me be happy, then,” your brows raised at what he meant. “come to miami. tonight.”
you froze, your fingers fiddling with the hem of your work shirt. “lando…” you sighed. “you know i can’t…”
“please…!” he whined into the phone. 
your resilience to him was not good. clearly.
“call my boss.” you heard him yip and pop his lips. he was giddy and thrilled that you accepted his advances. it never did take much, though, did it? 
you hung up the phone before you could say anything else and settled back into your temporary station before you were back in monaco full time. the office here was more than sufficient and, you couldn’t help but thank god that you were here when lando called. the flight to miami wouldn’t be more than three hours. 
your boss knocked on the door a few minutes later with her brows raised. 
she spoke her name and you perked up. “you didn’t tell me you had family in miami,” she said, crossing her arms. but she wasn’t angry. 
“i do.” the lie was swift. but it wasn't really a lie, was it…?
“your cousin called me, said that you need to use pto hours for a wedding…” she looked at her apple watch. “which is in a few hours?” 
you gulped. “what can i say,” you shrugged, “i’m a workaholic.”
your boss shrugged, turning to leave. “take the week off, you deserve it.”
so this is what working so hard got you? damn. you practically leapt off your seat, packing away your laptop and other essentials you had brought to the office. when you were skipping down the steps of the building to the parking garage, you got a text. 
flight leaves 6
> one attachment 
it was lando. you opened the text as you were unlocking your door, realizing he sent you a boarding pass. he already filled out all your information. he wanted you there that bad, didn’t he? you wouldn’t even consider the two of you close friends rather than buddies who fuck. 
you hearted the message and raced home to pack. 
when you touched down in miami, there was a car waiting for you outside the airport. you were shocked with such lively treatment, but weren’t one to start complaining. the ride to lando’s hotel wasn’t very long, either, but it was beautiful. 
when you stepped out you were greeted by the miami breeze, refreshing from the stagnant air in your humid new york building. 
“thought you were gonna chicken out,” his voice was light and airy. you were so dazed by the grandeur of the building that you didn’t see lando standing there at the entrance. you immediately gaped at him, embarrassed that you were caught off guard. 
“on what, this? luxury? be for real!” you stifled a laugh. he held out his hand for your bag, and you gave it to him. but it was really meant for your hand. 
his other hand wrapped around your waist, pulling you close. he peppered light kisses to your neck, but not your mouth. your relationship wasn’t intimate like that, it never was. kissing was the next step to love, you told him, and you never reached for his lips with the amount of times you’ve fucked. 
but he did. 
there was always something about your aura that allured him. it drew him in like a moth to flame, and he would happily burn if it meant being in your presence. but he wasn’t ready for a relationship, so he told himself, and neither were you…so you told yourself. 
yet you’ve explored each other’s bodies like vestigios conquerors. you knew what made him tick, he knew what made you squirm. it was a fair trade, you thought, and you had no intention of staying exclusive to him. 
but you’d make it known to him that when you were both together, there were no other girls around. no boys. it would be just the two of you in your own world, but it was on a time limit. 
your hand found the back of his neck, leaning into his lips, but you pulled back when you heard some whispering– paparazzi. 
you said nothing as you shifted past him, ripping his head from your neck. he looked confused before he glanced towards the growing crowd around the hotel entrance, some phones being whipped out to record. but he honestly didn’t give a fuck. 
but you did. the last thing you wanted was to be plastered as a whore all over your feed. you still needed your fucking job. 
“what,” he said, coming closer to you. you took a distancing step back. he came closer. you didn’t move this time. “you didn’t miss me?”
him and his fucking ego. 
but you did. 
“want me to show you?” you spun around, full of sass. he let out a light laugh, pressing his shoulders back and straightening his posture. little to your knowledge, he was rendered speechless and his dick tightened in his pants. blood flooded to his abdomen, which had him shifting on his feet. this fucking girl. 
“come on,” you cooed, nudging his arm. “i came here to celebrate, no? and you haven’t even bought me a drink yet!” you got him there. he nodded, quickling showing you up to his hotel room in miami. it was a beautiful room with a living room and a single bedroom with a king bed. 
when you were up there you got a good look, running your hands over the fabric of the couch and the untouched champagne sitting on the coffee table. “this doesn’t count,” you picked up the bottle, turning to face lando from where he stood, placing your luggage on an armchair. 
“what? not expensive enough for you?” you rolled your eyes at him, placing the bottle back down on the platter with the glasses. you made haste opening your suitcase, rummaging through the outfits you brought for the duration of your stay, and in particular, your dress. 
you pulled out the carefully folded fabric. you held it out in front of you, impressed by the lack of wrinkles, and turned to lando. 
his jaw fell agape, staring at the magnificent piece. it was a longer dress that went to your mid calf, and sparkled in the dim lights of the room. he moved closer to you, running his fingers over the fabric. you gulped in his presence. 
“shit,” he sighed out, followed by a laugh. “better put it on now.” you raised a brow at him, confused. “else we won’t make it out that fuckin’ door.” 
you stifled a giggle and ran towards the bathroom, changing quickly. 
there was a knock at the front door when you were just finishing up your look. lando answered when you peeked your head out of the archway to the bathroom. it was carlos. 
“ready yet, mate?” 
lando shrugged, moving out the way so carlos could make eye contact with you. he said your name with a cheer, brushing past lando to wrap his arms around you. he kissed both your cheeks in greeting, you returned it. lando hummed to himself, wondering what that kind of affection was like from you. guess he’d never know, huh? too intimate, the words rang in his head. 
fuck off. 
“you flew today?” carlos asked you. you nodded. 
“had to celebrate, didn’t i?” you let out a giggle, covering your stained lips when you glanced at lando who was focused elsewhere, his jaw clenching. it had your joy dying in your throat, suddenly feeling like there wasn’t any reason to smile at all. 
“of course!” carlos cheered, slapping lando on the back which had him falling back to earth. “can’t believe he finally did it.” lando’s first ever formula one win was an astronomical achievement. you wish you could’ve been there in person. 
“neither can i…” your voice trailed when you were focused on his freckled face. a constellation, you called it, and could lose yourself in counting them. and lando was looking at you and your beautiful face. he was addicted to you, he learned, and no girl could fuck him like you could. 
carlos glanced between the two of you and raised his brows. “right, then.” he cleared his throat. “let’s get going then, yeah? got the whole grid celebrating you, lando!”
you were quick to put on your heels and grab your clutch. lando waited by the door for you, holding the door open. 
when you brushed by him, he grabbed your arm and twisted you around. he pushed his head close to your chest, which had you flushing. 
“lando!” you scolded beneath your breath. 
“you smell like me,” he raised a brow. 
shit. you thought he wouldn’t notice. “grabbed your cologne on accident. was rushing…replaced it with mine, see?” you raised your wrist for him to smell and he did, nose brushing against your sensitive skin. your veins pumped just beneath a thin layer. you felt him inhale and you had shivers running up your spine. he glanced at you again, dropping your hand. 
“think mine’s better.”
he meant it. you smelling just like him had him on fucking edge. he didn’t understand why it mattered to him to such a high degree. the primal inclination soaring right over his head, but he knew you were his for the night. longer he would wish, but he would take anything he could get from you. 
you only rolled your eyes at him, proceeding to walk down the hall. he caught up with you, hand coming to your lower back to guide you. when you made it to the elevator, he stuck his head into your neck again, breath hot as it fanned against your skin. you leaned into him, but stomped your heeled foot. 
“lando…” 
he grumbled something inaudible. 
“speak, won’t you?” you gripped his chin, pulling him upward. 
“driving me fuckin’ crazy.”
your breath caught in your throat. he was always touchy, but it was never this intense. the way he grumbled against the skin of your throat, the needy vibrations which plucked deeply at the strings of your heart. but there shouldn’t be any of your heart involved.
“you’re just a madman, then.” 
he chuckled. “gonna lock me up?” 
if only, you wanted to say, but held your tongue. 
“papaya does look good on you.” you giggled, hand roaming his chest. but you were right about his madness. he was sickeningly crazy. he should be institutionalized, even, in the comfort of your home. what a hell that would be, wouldn’t it?
the drive to the club was short. it wasn’t very far from the hotel. the inside of his expensive mclaren had you dazzled, though it wasn’t really his, just a rental whilst he was in miami. still, your fingers found the pleasure of finding the leather that boarded the doors, wondering just how much leather you could adorn as decoration. 
lando, on the other hand, was white knuckling the steering wheel the entire time, debating whether or not his hand would find a good home on the skin of your thigh. your dress had been too long for that, though, and he didn’t…fuck, he didn’t even know. he was anxious to be with you this weekend, not hesitating to call you to be the first one to come down to congratulate him.
he had so many other girls. why did he choose you? he didn’t know it himself, wasn’t sure if he was ready to face such intense truths, but his heart led him astray dialing your phone number. he didn’t even hesitate nor want to connect with another girl, just you. 
fucking hell, and you looked heavenly in that dress. he would spend the entire fucking night shifting his pants to hide his stark boner from your eyes. 
rolling up to the club, he gave his keys to the valet and you stepped out, fixing the fabric of your scrunched dress. you made your way over to him, elegant as ever, when the cameras began to flash. the amount of attention frightened you, and your phone fell to the ground. it clattered against the pavement. 
lando reached down smoothly to pick it up for you, his movements lingering for a moment. when he rose, his hand grazed the back of your exposed calf, trailing up your body to rest on the fabric of your lower back, the top of your ass. you wanted to swat his hand away teasingly, but for the night…you’d allow it. the cameras flashed more and more. lando only separated from you to take a few selfies with fans, but that had been it. 
his hand found your back once more, pulling the fabric down that was scrunched at the back. he also did it as an excuse to rest his hand on your ass. guilty!
and you let him. more cameras flashed. he was yours for the evening. so you’d relish in the momentary fame, but would surely be horrified by the comments the next morning. but fuck it, you looked hot in this dress and wouldn’t let these heels go to waste. let them envy you, for you were surely going to envy the next girl on his arm. what? no you weren’t. that thought was fleeting. you were shocked that you imagined of such a scenario. 
inside the club was an ambiance of celebratory cadence. it was lively. the bright lights, cheering on goers. everyone seemed to swarm lando, congratulating him and patting him on the back. he was so happy here. 
you attempted to shimmy out of the limelight to give him the attention he deserved, but he tightened his hold on you, digging his fingertips into your waist. you were surprised, looking at him with confusion, but he didn’t even take his eyes off of one of the mclaren engineers who attended the festivities. 
playing arm candy wasn’t your specialty, but you had the basics down. smile and laugh. straight posture. being fucking perfect. easy stuff, you know? surely sitting in an office chair for your day to day would enthuse a straight spine. surely listening to your old, ratty coworkers jokes would have you rolling with laughter and smiles. surely it was the easiest thing in the world to be perfect for lando norris–
your name was called by a girl at your side. it was alexandra!
you gasped, swinging out of lando’s arms and throwing yourself into her. she caught you, looking absolutely elegant while doing it, and smiled into your hair. 
“thank god you’re here!” you cheered, your hands landing on her shoulders to steady yourself. she looked stunning this evening. but she always did. you envied her for that much. 
“of course!” her french accent was sweet and endearing. her voice was even softer. “none of us would miss it. i’m glad you’re here!” 
alexandra and you had grown a relationship over the past few years you’ve been acquainted with lando. she seemed to always be where you were, and by coincidence, the two of you followed each other on tiktok and realized you had, if not, the same humor. you began messaging each other back and forth, and there you had it– a beautiful friendship between the two of you. being long distance best friends was hard, but it was times like these that you were grateful to see her. 
lando had froze when he felt you slip from his grasp, a horrible feeling of incomprehensible dread washing over him that he couldn’t pinpoint why. he interrupted the conversation he was having to see you with your arms wrapped around alexandra, kissing both of her cheeks. his face flushed, hand tightening on the drink he was given by his mates. 
why not him? 
lando excused himself and clung to your side. you jumped at the feeling of his hand around your waist, eyes snapping up to meet his… irritated ones? you were at a loss as to what could warrant such a look, but you didn’t let it linger when you shifted closer to him, your hips against his thighs. he seemed to relax both his body and face, giving alexandra a smile.
she was amidst congratulating him when charles and carlos approached. rebecca at carlos’ side. 
“is this a party or…?” charles remarked, luring you all to the center of the room to dance. lando glanced at you. you could feel his eyes, but you didn’t meet them. not yet. you thought that if you had, you wouldn’t be able to stop tonight. not with how good he looked, not with how he smelled. 
on the dance floor was no better. his hands were all over you. it was a bittersweet homecoming to feel so close to you, so flustered. but you loved the way he made you feel. pure adrenaline. alive. your hips swayed and grinded into his own, him matching your pace with a drink in his hand. there had been one in yours too, but you downed it already. 
at one point when the beat dropped, they all began to shout his name. you included. his cheeky little smile had him muster the courage to down his drink, emptying the large glass. whoops and hollers filled the club, and there were no more words to describe how magical this night was for him. he would remember it forever, and you couldn’t blame him. 
he was magnificent in the spotlight. with a charming tongue, funny jokes, and charisma that had him swooping up any girl he could want. there were a pack of women surrounding him before he pulled you by the arm, interrupting your conversation with alexandra, twirling you to be plastered against his side. the women’s attention didn’t last long after that. 
“cheeky, aren’t you?” you raised your lips to his ears, daring to lay one against the top of his throat. you felt him swallow, his adams apple thick and bobbing. 
“don’t like to be a cornered animal.” you knew it was meant to be a joke, but there was a layer of truth to it that you couldn’t ignore. lando didn’t do well in crowds without flustering with anxiety. to that truth about him, you could toast to. 
you were back on the floor with him in a matter of minutes, engaging in conversation with alexandra and charles. lando was talking to others as well, but he was firm against your back, hand on your stomach. the action had you blushing, unable to forget any time that he’d lay his hands there, asking if you could feel him. and you could. now, you could feel the imprint of his cock behind you. you didn’t know how he could last this long without asking you to fuck him in the bathroom, but you weren’t complaining. 
yet!
steadily as the night progressed, he would be laced with sweat and the smell of him. a mix of body odor, sure, it smelt like lando. your lando for the night. he flashed you a smile as he leaned over your body from behind, both hands gripping your hips against him. 
you returned the gesture, but were much more bashful than he anticipated. you were giving him that look. a look that he had become trained to respond to. his dick instantly hardened. pavlov was onto something, wasn’t he? 
you both had been there for hours. you could only handle so many more amped up bass drops. and you were both plastered enough. it was around four in the morning when you were tumbling out, giggling and laughing at who knows what. 
one of the valet club drivers even drove the both of you back to the hotel. neither of you are in the state to drive. 
in the car, one of your legs was atop his, slotted between his thighs. you could feel his pulsing cock and your mouth watered at the sensation. he was staring at you through dangerously dark eyes, reflecting back your own stare of desire. it was like looking in a mirror for the both of you. ravaging and desperate to have one another’s hands on each other’s bodies. 
lando took liberty and lowered his head to your exposed shoulder, pulling down a thin strap of your dress to your bicep. he kissed the skin tenderly, an action too intimate for your own good, but you were too fucking drunk to deny it. 
“fucking beautiful,” he muttered into your skin, quiet for only your ears to touch. you let your fingers trace up the side of his face lazily, feeling your gaze spinning beneath his tender words. 
“i’m proud of you,” you whispered, brushing a stray curl from his sticky forehead up into the rest of his hairs. “you know that, don’t you?” 
your voice had been tender. delicious to his drunken ears. though he knew he’d remember this sober– he had a feeling. how could he forget that tone of voice, your gentle touch, clearly breaking the bounds of what was too intimate.
he gulped, eyes flaring wide at your declaration. his hand found your thighs then, gripping the soft flesh with depth. 
your fingers traced down to his bottom lip, puckering the flesh, but dropped to the car seat with a laugh. you brushed off his shocked expression, leaning back into the cool leather. but his grip didn’t relent. he kept his eyes on you, too, unable to find something else to fixate on. you were the object of all of his desires. he confirmed it then when he was desperate to hear more of your unsolicited praises from your lips. 
he craved your lips. 
lando’s head dropped to your waist, his face nuzzling into your soft flesh. he kissed through the fabric of your dress, desperate to feel you beneath such a guarding sheath from your skin. you turned your head to look at him from where your gaze latched to the window, your hand rolling down the curve of his neck. 
you kept your hand there for the remainder of the drive, but didn’t look down at him. you knew you’d be face with those desperate, glistening green eyes of his. you’d fall weak beneath the light of his love, and you’d find yourself disappointed when he didn’t want what you did. a relationship, dare you think it just for one second. 
the valet driver dropped the two of you off and was able to manage a cab on his own back to the club. lando tipped him a hundred euros for his time, beginning to sober himself enough to walk in a straight line and speak without slurring his speech. 
you were the same. stretching your legs from the car, hands above your head in a dramatic feline stretch. lando’s eyes were on you the entire time, gaping at your figure. your ass. his lip caught between his teeth, and you caught him ogling. 
your hips began to sway beneath the music of his eyes. you’re unable to resist his humorous allure, crumbling the second the second the corner of his eyes uplifted. a smile followed, his gapped, perfect, teeth shimmering the reflections of the pale moonlight. 
he stretched out his arm for you to join him at his side. you sashayed there, twirling in your heels that ached your feet. but you did it for him. you’d do it all, though the alcohol was driving your thoughts. 
lando swooped you into his grasp, wrapping his arms around your waist and digging his fingertips into your hips. you laughed amicably, his presence both a comfort and a feat of pride. 
you mustered the strength to break his hold, trotting up the steps of the hotel. your heels were loud in the quiet, tender moments of the rising miami sun, and your giggles even more so. lando wasn’t far behind, skipping the steps to catch up with you. 
you’d never seen him hit an elevator button harder. you resisted the urge to laugh, knowing it was an impossible situation to be so loud at dawn. so you bit your fist in your mouth, choking down a sound that lando yearned to hear. 
when the elevator arrived he jumped right in, dragging you along– though it’s not like you hesitated– by your elbow. 
he immediately began trailing kisses down your throat, the column of your neck, your collarbones, shoulders. he left no place untouched by his devout, worshipping lips. he’d often say in the heat of the moment that you were the best thing he’s ever tasted– a man feral for your sweet nectar– but you just thought it to be the post-euphoria sex high. 
the british driver muttered something into your neck which had your eyes flaring wide, uncertain if you heard him correctly. 
you pushed his head back, gripping at the curls near the base of his neck. “what did you say?”
he looked flushed. embarrassed. he choked on his words, shaking his head. he was clearly brushing it off. 
“nothin’.”
he resumed devouring your neck, saliva dripping onto your dress, but his words bubbled. 
the ding of the elevator alerted both of you. he was the one to lead the way to his hotel room, swiftly opening the door with skilled ease, and had you against the wall in minutes. he gripped at the fabric of your dress, tempting to rip it. you hissed with contempt. “don’t,” he looked up at you with heavy eyes and a half toothed smirk, challenging you. “too expensive.” 
you felt him scoff against the skin of your chest. “‘too expensive.’” he mocked. 
but he heeded your words, gentle with how he lowered the straps to your forearms. your head lolled against the wall, eyes glistening with liquidated pleasure. there was nothing better in the world that could feel better than lando norris’ lips against your skin. each press was a blessing, a kiss of life, hungry for the divination you relented this evening. 
“so fucking beautiful,” he breathed when he shimmied you out of the dress, neatly undoing the zipper. you wore nothing under the dress besides panties, which had his eyes gawking at your taut, perked nipples. you shifted forward, desperate for his touch on your suddenly cold body. 
lando didn’t wait. his cock was already painfully hard in his pants, punishing the fabric for being so restrictive. he pulsated, precum already ruining the pair. 
his lips found your nipple, other palm fisting the firm flesh. you let out a sweet moan that was delicious to his starving ears, your hips bucking into his for a relenting yearn for release. he let out the deepest chuckle from his throat, finding such impending amusement for your desire. 
when he was contempt with the titillation of your nipples, he moved to the skin of your belly, biting softly at the skin. enough to leave bruises for his own eyes when he’d see you next. next. there was always a next with you. 
but you had other plans. 
your hands reached for his face, pulling him to meet your eyes. his own blew wide, flickering to your lips, to your eyes. 
“let me,” you whimpered, reaching for the buckle of his pants. he’d stop you, usually intending on getting you off with his lips or tongue before he could even cum. but tonight, he couldn’t resist your lips. you looked up at him with pure heaven written in your iris’. 
he swallowed before nodding his head rapidly, his forehead leaning into yours. “yeah, yeah, please.” 
lando norris wasn’t a man to beg. he didn’t have to do any of that shit for his other girls– they were always eager to please him, fuck him, suck him off– but for you…
your lips found his neck, feeling the thick muscles with your tongue. it was arousing how muscular each part of his body was, thundering with endurance. 
there was a soft mewl in his throat when you slid your hand down the front of his pants, beneath his briefs, over the length of his cock. the sound excited you tenfold– wishing that you could hear it a hundred times over again. it was addicting how he wanted you. 
when your finger grazed his tip, his hips bucked instinctively into you, just how yours had. he cursed under his breath, letting his head fall limp into the crevice of your neck. 
you laughed into his skin, finally falling to your knees to drop his pants and briefs. his cock sprung free, red and vibrating for your touch. your touch. you often wondered how his other girls treated him. if you were better, if you were the worst. obviously not the worst if he was the one to call you after his first win, right?
one hand stroked his length, traveling to his balls, simultaneously glancing up at him. he was staring down at you, riddled with urgency, a pleading look reflecting in your eyes. his bottom lip caught between his teeth when his hand found the back of your head, stroking the sides of your face. 
his thumb caressed your bottom lip. it caused your lips to open for him, and his thumb found your tongue. you swirled it around the pad of his finger, never breaking the shared look between you two. you let him go with a pop, and he found his hand at the base of your neck again, hand wrapping a makeshift ponytail with his hand. 
your lips swirled around the head of his cock, swallowing the precum that dampened his briefs. he held back a rumble in his throat which annoyed you, so you took him wide in your mouth, bottoming him out in the back of your throat. 
your cunt clenched around nothing when his whole body sang in praise of your lips. he faltered when you began a steady pace of back and forth, stimulating his balls with your other hand. curses fell from his lips, sinful words, and he gripped your hair tightly. with his other one, he fell forward against the wall, bracing for dear life.
but you didn’t relent. faster and faster you went, and you were awarded by his hips snapping into you, cock gagging your windpipe. you choked, tears forming in your eyes, but it was divine how satisfying it was. to see his eyes rolling back into his head, hands shaking, desperate to feel you up. from this position, below him, you could see the entire world. you had it all on the tip of your tongue. 
“fuck, baby…” he groaned. you felt so good around him. warm and tight. it felt like fucking home for him. somewhere he’d always come back to. and he would. no other girl could make him feel this way, had him about to cum in a matter of three minutes. your lips were made to take his cock, and he would yell that to hell and back for the entire world to know. 
he felt you moan against his cock, the sound echoing in your throat. he swallowed harshly, drool dripping down the side of his chin at the sight of you alone. you were perfect. 
and when your hand came to run over your nipples, kneading at the skin of your breasts, he felt his abdomen tighten. you found so much pleasure in sucking him off that you felt the need to touch yourself. fuck, he never thought he’d see something so hot in his entire life. 
he knew he’d been done for in a matter of seconds. with a firm grip of your hair, he pulled you back from his cock. you looked offended, disappointed when the drool from your lips trailed down your chin. 
“not yet,” he uttered, gripping the side of your face with his other hand. his cock was angry, furious at the lack of attention. he was practically fucking edging himself. “wanna cum inside you.” 
say less, you wished to say, but all that came out from your lips was a whine. 
and then you were laid out on your back on his bed. the white sheets were clean and made, cold beneath your scorching skin. 
lando traced two fingers up your thigh, the junction of your hips, your waist. you shivered, toes clenching at the sensation. then to your naval, your pussy, your dampened underwear. a ruined pair, no doubt. he smirked, lip curling. 
“all for me, huh?” 
you nodded instantly. 
his hand slapped against your flushed pussy. you whimpered, grasping at the sheets. 
“words, pretty girl.”
“yes!” you gasped when you felt him tug the underwear down your legs. “you, you, you, lando. all you.”
he practically purred. your folds were swollen and glistening, drenched from how his cock pounded into your mouth. “so wet,” he observed, twisting his fingers to trail up your slit, gathering the slick between his fingers. he raised the pair to his mouth, tasting your sweet juice on his tongue. your legs pulsed together, eager for friction, a quiet mewl leaving your throat at the sight. “tastes like heaven.”
“lando…” you were getting impatient now. rightfully so. he stood there with his hardened cock, teasing you with his firm fingers. 
“what’dya want, baby? hm?” he asked, knowing damn well what the answer would be. yet he’d trace his hands gently up the sides of your body, fingers dancing over your nipples. you writhed. 
“you.” you said endearingly. “fuck me, lan, please.” 
he was so impressed with your manners that he couldn’t resist slipping his cock inside of you. atop of you he caged you in, a blessed enclosure, lips pressing to your exposed chest. you whined at the initial stretch, always finding yourself so tight around his thick cock. 
“fuck, lando.” you hissed, teeth clenching at his immaculate girth. it was a pleasurable burn, and your arousal only had you clenching around him. he huffed through his nose, hot hair breathing over your skin. 
“i know, baby,” he reassured you with his bittersweet voice. “y’can take me, can’t you? always such a good girl for me.” 
you whined at his words, low moan bellowing in your throat. you squelched with your slick and he could feel it. he smirked, having the gall to chuckle, even. but you didn’t punish him for it, especially not when he began to move his hips back and forth, a pair of fingers coming to rub against the bundle of nerves placatated at your clit. 
the sensation of feeling him slip in and out of you was impeccable. you could find no other pleasure than his cock nestled inside of you, filling you to the absolute hilt of your dreams. the imprint of his dick had him riled with lust when it ran over your lower belly. 
“feel me here,” his hand came to grab yours, bringing it to the imprint of his cock inside of you. “don’t you?” 
you nodded, lip catching between your teeth and opposite hand threading through his curls as if you were a needle and thread. “so good, lando, please. keep going.” 
and he did. if you asked him to do anything right now, he would’ve. the slapping of skin echoed in the hotel room, filling silence with vulgar sounds from both of your lips. lando was a moaning mess at the pulses of your cunt, intent on sucking him dry from his cum. and he was an expert at navigating your clit, pinching and swirling the rough pads of his fingers. 
your eyes rolled in the back of his head when you bucked your hips for a better angle. “deeper,” you said, finding a grim satisfaction at the thought of him splitting you open. 
his eyes flashed to yours, bloodshot and red with lust, and shifted so your thighs were over his shoulders. your back arched for him and he was pleased to see your receptiveness. his hips didn’t falter, and neither did his hands. 
this angle had been more than what any gospel could provide. more than any destiny written out for you. fucking him was written in the stars, you knew it for certain, and you blossomed into a glistening constellation before him. for he was the entire universe for you, and you just a mere fractal in the midst of it all. 
but oh, how that wasn’t true. how you were the sun in which he orbited, woke up and thought of. you were the first person that he called after his father, needing your presence with him in miami. he needed this. your cunt. your pleasures, your moans. you, it was on the tip of his tongue, edging its way forward through the kisses he laid upon your neck. 
you were drenched in his saliva, coated in the thick musk of lando norris. he would never say it aloud but he dreamed of the day to see his cum dripping down your thighs, full of him, the remnants of your love affair sticky and haughty with each step that you’d take. 
it was a primal instinct that became so vicious. it overtook him, thwarting him into a dick-measuring contest whenever you went out with him. he’d keep you close. his, the message would be clear. no man would approach you when he had his hand on your lower back, your hips in his hands, your pelvis grinding against his own. you were his own keepsake. the light at the end of the tunnel. a brazen warrior that he’d follow into any battle. 
the only battle he was intending on winning was the war of your heart, blessed be his troops. 
it only took a few more harsh thrusts of his cock and twiddling of his fingers before you were painfully close to a release. he could feel it. he knew it like the back of his hand. your trembling legs, intense writhing against his hold, your breathy moans. he wished he could take a picture of you, flushed and desperate, and keep it in his wallet. 
“come on, baby.” he urged, feeling the own heat of his orgasm rising in his lower stomach. he had been resisting the urge to cum for your sake, always finding a deeper satisfaction in seeing your overstimulated face after the fact. 
“come for me, won’t you? pretty thing. i’ve got you,” the words of praise that were only meant for you. he didn’t call any of his other girls ‘baby’, but you wouldn’t know that. you couldn’t know. it would ruin all of this, wouldn’t it? wouldn’t it? 
i’ve got you, he said tenderly. it’s what had you compulsing, drenching his cock in your slick. your orgasm washed over you like a tidal wave, drowning you in the euphoria of what was lando norris’ pleasure. 
he was staring at your worn out face, his own tongue coming to swipe at his bottom lip. he was ready to feast on you. 
lando’s own orgasm was swift to follow. the rhythm of his hips faltered, sloppily, aggressively. the overstimulation against the walls of your cunt was delectable. 
“come for me,” you begged him. it had his eyes flaring once more, shocked to hear such a request from your pretty lips. “inside me, lan, need it…” 
“fuck…” he groaned, and with one last snap of his hips he was spilling out inside of you. his forehead fell into the crook of your neck, breathing heavily. your chests moved in unison, catching your breaths after such an intense fuck. 
you were sticky against him. his body fell atop of yours, and your hands wrapped around his back. one hand came to run up and down his neck again, which had his eyes fluttering with sleep. but he didn’t let himself, and instead moved to get a towel for you both.
he slipped outside of you, the warmth of your cunt had his expression falling. he saw your face, too, empty once he made his way to the on suite. he grabbed a handheld towel and ran it under the warm water, and crossed the space between the bathroom and the bed. 
lando let it run up your thighs, between your legs. your cunt was swollen still, his cum thick and dripping from your slit. he smirked to himself, cleaning the remnants of himself from the immediate vicinity, but wouldn’t go further. 
you were aware. entirely too aware of how warm you felt. how filled you were. it was filthy how good sex with him was. you could never orgasm with any man but him. 
lando fell to the bed beside you, opening the sheet for you to slip in beside him. you hesitated, never having spent an entire night with him, except for a few drunk evenings. did this count? you weren’t sure. you’d certainly remember that mind blowing orgasm. 
but his eyes were drooping with sleep, weary when you hesitated. you couldn’t resist, and slid in beside him, comforted by the furnace of his body. 
lando’s head found home, once more, in the side of your neck. you brushed the hairs from his sweating forehead, roamed through his scalp. you ran circles through his hair until you heard the soft snores coming from him. it only took a few seconds for him to fall asleep in your arms and for once, you were perfectly content with that. if this was what your life would be, then so be it. 
the british driver woke approximately twenty four hours later. 
when he woke, you were not there. 
he was startled as he searched for you, but there was no sign of you. he sat up in his bed, sun peeking in through the curtains. he rubbed his eyes, hand resting on the spot that you had laid in. there was an imprint from your body. 
when he checked his phone, he knew he was in deep shit. 
“fuck.” it really had been a full day that he slept through.
but there were no texts from you. 
his gut tightened, heart beating loudly in his throat. why are there no texts from you? 
he scanned the room to find a glass of water on the nightstand, previously iced from the ring of water around the side of it. and there was a note, too, with some ibuprofen. he picked it up. 
had a good night
proud of you always
text me when you’re up x
and it was signed by you. 
he folded the piece of paper.
he supposed it was a good night. the best sex he’s ever had, in fact, and wouldn’t forget his own confession in the elevator. he wasn’t sure if you heard it or not, but there was a part of him that wanted you to. 
“you were always my favorite,” he spoke into the column of your neck. 
the next time you saw lando was in monaco. 
you were back home and invited by alexandra to the paddocks for the home race of charles. you accepted, of course, hoping to catch a glimpse of lando. 
you hadn’t texted him much, but neither had he. you heard first from him on that tuesday morning and it had you smiling at the airport, bags in hand. you texted back, and it was sporadic from there on out. it’s been a few days since either of you’ve said a word, and it was beginning to wane on you. 
alexandra repeated your name. 
“yeah?” you responded, head snapping towards her direction. 
“i asked if you were feeling alright.” 
“oh.” you breathed, laughing it off. “of course, do i not seem okay?” alexandra shook her head, petting leo’s little head in her hands. 
“you’ve been quiet, that’s all.” 
and you had been. but since she noticed, you were determined to make her forget about it. 
“nervous for charles,” you lied. but alexandra bought it and agreed with you, shedding her anxieties for her boyfriend’s home race. 
you were standing on the balcony with her in ferrari’s hospitality. you looked elegant today, matching alexandra’s own vibe. your hands were clasped together as you were leaning down, watching the drivers go in and out for their free practice. 
alexandra was still ranting about how nervous she was for charles when you saw him.
the papaya was noticeable from anywhere. 
lando
lando and company. 
a girl trailing behind him. her hair was done neatly, blonde, painfully thin. you grimaced against your will, face scrunching with a bitterness you had never felt before. 
alexandra tapped your elbow before she looked down at what you were staring at. 
“asshole.” she remarked, scoffing. 
you raised a brow. “you think so?”
alexandra nodded as if it was obvious. “don’t know why he brings them around,” she sighed. “not when he could have you.” 
you never felt so flattered before. you blushed, thanking her for saying something so kind. though you denied having feelings for him. she knew it was a lie this time. 
lando glanced up at the balcony, finding your eyes inevitably. he could feel your stare at the back of his head. 
and he fucking waved. 
the girl beside him looked up, too, but she did not. 
you could see lando’s smile from up here, but in your intensive bitterness, you did not wave back. you stood and turned to go back into ferrari’s hospitality, not thinking twice about your decision. 
the rest of the weekend you spent in bitter earnest. you’ve never seen yourself in such a state. but you plastered on a smile for alexandra and charles, entirely too elated when he crossed the finish line first in monaco. you held her as she weeped with joy. 
and, of course, you were invited to the festivities for the evening. your attitude was soured by the girl latched to lando’s arm throughout the entire weekend. but he looked so nonchalant with her, careless. none of it mattered. you’d put on your best dress for the evening. 
in the club you were found nursing a martini in your hand, not quaint on the taste, but were keen on getting wasted. you didn’t want to deal with whatever shit storm of emotions were brewing inside of your head. seeing lando with another girl was not new for you to witness. it was the norm, in fact, and you never thought about it otherwise.
but something changed that night of his win in miami. you knew it. he knew it. the words he uttered into your neck in that elevator was sending you up the wall and skyrocketing into the abyss of the universe. and you believe that somehow, he would find you.
he would find you. 
lando saw you instantly when you entered with alexandra and charles. rebecca and carlos paired together, too, leaving you the odd one out with no arm candy on display. good, the thought was impulsive. 
the girl beside him was giggling at something he said. but it wasn’t meant as a joke. he was convinced that she just had no idea what he was talking about, and was eager for a good fuck from him. he knew his skills of pleasure were not in comparison to any low life dude, but no girl could fulfill the void of receptiveness. of yearning desire. 
so when he tilted his head back to down the rest of his drink, he grimaced at the taste, and turned back to the girl he brought with him. but he kept stealing glances at you in your short dress. it was like you were punishing him– were you? he suddenly felt like a dog, a bad boy, reared and chained to the dog house outside your house of a heart. 
but you didn’t see him. not for a while, actually. you were intent on staying true to your morals– staying away from him this evening. he only brought trouble for you. confusion. you were sick of this back and forth, and most importantly, this rotten feeling of jealousy. it wasn’t a good look on you, or so you thought. 
“dance with me?” alexandra asked you. you accepted, of course, grabbing her hand and holding it high above the crowds as she led you to the dance floor. you were both twirling and laughing with your drinks in hand, purely electric with the rap music. charles joined her, gripping her from behind. you couldn’t help but watch, gulping down the feeling of envy. 
alexandra noticed. she knew what you were going through, even if you wouldn’t say it aloud. your ‘relationship’ with lando has gone on for far too long without any real commitment. everyone knew he was your favorite girl to be around, except you. you were the only one, apparently, who didn’t know that lando looked at you like a goddess reincarnate. 
and when you shook off your thoughts of envy, your eyes found another pair staring back at you.
sharp emeralds, piercing through the musk of the club.
your breath hitched, catching solemnly in your throat. 
the blonde was grinding up against him, throwing her head back against his shoulders. one hand was on her hip, the other with an empty shot glass in his hand. the girl was enjoying herself, at least, and you wondered if he fucked her the same as he did you. 
his eyes didn’t leave yours as his hips swayed in motion with hers. his hair was disheveled, a coat of sweat gleaning on his forehead. 
the pair of you were waiting to see who would break first. who would succumb to the challenge. you wanted so desperately to win, to grab another random man and kiss on his neck, but you were detested. 
the air inside the club felt heavy, and the world would collapse on you. the weight was too much on your shoulders as you became lightheaded. 
“i need air,” you said to alexandra before you fled from the dance floor, leaving your glass on the counter. 
the air of monaco was brisk when it pierced your skin, your thighs, your shoulders. but it was a much needed refreshment from the confines of that fucking club. you felt nauseous, sickened by lando’s eye contact with you. how dare he. 
you looked around before turning the corner of the club, seeing a pair of men smoking a cigarette. 
“care to share?” 
the men glanced at one another and the one holding the pack nodded. he handed you one and you placed it to your lips. he held out the lighter, too, and lit it for you. 
you weren’t one to smoke. it was a drunk cigarette kind of night. 
they insisted on you staying with them, talking each other up to be some pair of scrouges who deserved your attention. you politely declined their advances and walked the other way, feeling colder when the tobacco hit your lungs. 
when you blew out your first puff, it wasn’t long before the cigarette was ripped from your lips. 
“hey–” 
“this shit isn’t good for you.” 
lando.
he found you out here. rather, he chased you out. the minute he saw you turn your back he scrambled, pushing past every person that came in his way.
you scoffed, unable to look at him as you crossed your arms. 
“you don’t know what’s good for me.”
he paused, sucking in a tight breath. his jaw clenched. the cigarette was thrown to the ground, crushed beneath his foot. 
“rude–” you uttered, cut off when he grabbed your elbow. that had you looking at him. and his expression didn’t disappoint.
his eyes were widened, pupils blown wide as he looked into your own. his lip trembled momentarily, jaw entirely too tight for his own good. 
“what’s going on with you?” he wondered, holding eye contact with you. 
“nothing.” you answered instantly, brushing him off. but he didn’t accept that. 
“‘nothing,’” he mocked. “you’re not a very good liar.” 
you hummed. “thanks.” 
the conversation widdled down, but he wasn’t about to give up. 
“tell me,” he requested, his face pulling closer to yours. you had to give it to him. he was determined. but you were too.
“there’s nothing to tell.” you bit back. 
“i care about you. come on–” your name fell sweetly from his lips. he was prepared to grovel at any second now. 
but you cut him off. “ohhh…! yeah, right, you care? pfft, no need to pretend, lando.” 
he pulled back, shocked that you got in his face. your words were cruel, but he felt the double meaning behind them. 
“what?” he asked, softly. you knew then that he was hurt. 
but jealousy was a monster.
“i wish i was as stupid as you think i am.” you rambled, hands thrown up with emotion. but you were done with this conversation. “fuck it, i’m leaving–”
but he used his other hand to ground you before him. “don’t.” he pleaded. eyes watering. 
“what? like you’d notice?” 
then the bells chimed in his head. an alert that he understood what this was. he was stupid in not knowing what was happening before him. 
you’re jealous. 
“didn’t take you for a jealous type.”
you scoffed. “you’re ridiculous.”
but he shook his head and tsked. “can’t believe it, baby, that you hid it for so long.” 
“fuck you.”
he blew out a huff of air as if he were wounded, hand coming to run over his chest. it was a fatal one, that was for sure. you tried again to push past him, but to no avail nor universe would he let you go. 
“come home with me.”
his words were determined, sincere, though there was a layer of softness to it. like unsweetened honey that poured from his lips. 
you stared at him. “what?” 
he laughed. “you heard me. let me take you home.”
you couldn’t tell if he was being serious. couldn’t tell if he was mocking you. your facial expression dropped from its intense anger. 
“don’t…” you started, feeling the heat of emotions that you’ve been burying come to the surface. your eyes swelled with tears but fuck, you promised you’d never cry over him. “don’t be mean, lando.”
his smile dropped. he knew then that you weren’t playing around, messing with him in the ways you usually had. what was this feeling inside of him? guilt? he wanted nothing more than to fix whatever he’s done. the instinct blazed a fire through his veins, igniting a deep rooted reaction that he feared only you could bring out of him. 
his hand came to cup your cheek. you flinched backward, staring at the palm of his hand through your wet lashes, but allowed his touch. 
“come here…” his hand dropped from your cheek to hold out for you to melt into. an invitation for a hug. 
you hesitated, shifting closer on your tip toes. when you were in close enough reach, he grabbed you, earning a yelp. 
his body was warm. he pulled you flush against his chest, his head coming to rest on your shoulder. his hands were wrapped firmly around your torso. was he shaking? 
he was. lando was wrought with a surplus of emotion when he saw your anger diffuse. he loved to feel all of your emotions, it reminded him that you cared about him. but when he saw it disappear, faze into an abyss of melancholy, his heart set into overdrive. he never got such a rush of adrenaline before. not from racing. not from anything else in his life.
you relaxed into him, shutting your eyes. there was a wet stain from the single tears that fell from your face on his shirt. 
but you didn’t care. he smelled so good. it was lando. your lando. 
“let me take you home.”
your nose buried into his shirt. his stubble dug into your neck. 
“your place,” you muttered. “i want to go to yours.” 
his place was always for special occasions. but to your unbeknownst knowledge, you were the only girl he’s ever taken there. the only woman he’s fucked in his bed. 
he stuttered. “yeah,” he cleared his throat. “yeah, of course we can.”
you didn’t even end up texting alexandra goodbye. you were too wrung tight with your jealousy, coined poignantly by lando himself. he was quick to catch on to your attitude shift, but you could tell he was frightened. at least you wished for it to be. 
but he was. his heart plummeted when your anger reached him. it did more than touch him, it ripped him apart, had his heart bleeding in plain sight. anyone could see it except you. it was never you who saw the love beneath his eyes. 
lando’s apartment was just how you remembered it to be. 
open space, loosely decorated. it was rather bland. 
“you kept it!” you ran your fingers over the displayed teddy bear, one that you had won for him at a fair. 
he shut the door behind you two, locking it. he let out a soft hum. “‘course i did.” 
he said it like it was obvious. he would never get rid of anything that you’d give him. you squeezed the teddy bear in your palms, but dropped it when you felt lando’s arms wrap around your waist from behind. 
his lips found your neck in an instant. 
“i missed you.” 
you tensed. back arching, you turned your head to look at him, angled perpendicular to his face burrowed into the junction of your neck and collarbones. 
“really, now?” 
he chuckled against your skin, fanning his warm breath through your body. the hairs on the back of your neck rose instinctively, choosing to hold your breath instead of express anger. though you couldn’t help the huff through your nose. 
“you’re so vicious when you’re jealous, darling.” he thought this was funny. it angered you even more, attempting to writhe out of his hold. but he didn’t relent, keeping you taught against his chest. asshole. 
“am not.” 
he tsked. 
“sure.” he continued his trail of kisses down your neck. you fell into him, head lolling back and eyes rolling. fuck, his lips were always so good. he was so good to you. 
“am not.” you said again, biting back a moan when his hands came to your forefront, parting your legs for his hands to rest between your thighs. 
“whatever you say.” 
your hips grinded against his own in retaliation which had him humming in soft praises. his fingers trailed the lining of your panties, other hand holding your hip firmly . 
“because i’m not–” the moan that was pulled from your throat was pure divinity to lando’s ears. his fingers had run up your slit, teasing your entrance. blood ran down to your body, fueling your cunt to a puffy state. your weight went lax against his hold, which he was perfectly capable of supporting you. 
“not what?” he dared you to continue, not when he had you numb in his hold already. he was clearly cocky. you could hear the smirk in his voice. 
“i’m not–” you were determined. but lando was coming back in full force. his middle finger teased you, pushing between your slick, finding the warmth of your walls. you sucked in a tight breath, feeling just how wet you’ve become. 
“so wet, baby,” he said into your ear. “what were you saying?” 
“fuck–” you sighed, whining. “i’m not jeal–” 
and then he seized the bundle of nerves around your clit, curling his middle finger inside of you. you cursed, sweat beginning to bead around your forehead. 
“mhm.” lando proved himself right when you couldn’t mutter out a sentence, becoming dumb on his fingers alone. he began a steady pace with just a singular digit, flexing in and out of you supported by your natural lubrication.  
“more–” you pleaded. it had him standing up straight, reacting to your soft pleas like he was a dog to a treat. pavlov, and all that shit. he found himself staring down at the sight of your two– his finger etching in and out of you, drenched in your sweet nectar. if he was no better than a dog, why was he about to drool? 
“yeah? you can take another?” you were rapidly nodding against the back of his shoulder, biting your lip.
“yes, please. please, lando.” you mewled, gripping at his forearms that caged you in. you never wanted to be chained down, but for pleasure like this, you felt as though you could make an exception. 
he obeyed. adding a second finger was close enough to your release, and you knew that was barreling forward at any minute. if he kept this assault of your clit up and the delicious curl of his fingers, you would melt into a puddle. 
and you knew he would. if lando started something, he would finish it. the only priority for him was to make sure you reached an orgasm. that was a promise, forever and always. 
he found himself bucking his hips into you, the sight of you weak in his arms becoming too much for him to handle. the friction between his pants and your hot cunt was too irresistible. what can he say? you were just pure bottled heaven. 
his thumb had been applying more intense pressure to your clit. your face was entirely flushed now, brightened from his attention. he was entirely to carnal to hear the noises you made. noises for him to hear, no one else. 
but his pace was slow. teasing. you felt like this was a punishment. your lip curled, face contorting with both pleasure and angst. “please, please.” you whimpered. 
“what, baby? what do you want?” smug. always so smug. 
you gripped his hand that was flexing inside of you, tightening your grip. he chuckled deeply. 
“wanna come? that what you want?” 
your head bobbed up and down, breaths coming in fast pants. “need.” you corrected him, and he thought that he would fall dead at your feet. his jaw clenched, muscles in his arms flexing, and he would give you want you needed. 
you needed him. 
that was all that he needed to hear from you. 
you turned your head to look up at him with your bloodshot eyes, dreary with lust. lust for him. your lashes fluttered against your brow line, lip quivering with a singular wish. 
he wanted nothing more to kiss you. 
“fuck.” he groaned, your thighs were drenched in your slick, a sight he thought could never be hotter. and when he curled his two fingers sweetly, your hips bucked aggressively. he knew exactly how to navigate your body, but it was always so thrilling to see you react in such a way. 
“yeah?” he smirked, “that good?” 
“so good, lan,” the nickname you used for him was not intentional. it had his dick throbbing in his pants. fuck.
your words of praise would only have him working harder. he didn’t even need to add a third finger when your stomach snapped with tension, coming loose all over his fingers. your vision blurred, legs shaking rapidly. you cried out, head lolled against his shoulder. he held you tightly, and you didn’t miss how he stroked your hip with his thumb. a soothing action. 
how he could ever find this kind of pleasure in another woman, he didn’t know. but the challenge begged– could he ever admit that? 
his fingers remained buried in your cunt whilst you rode yourself free from your high. it was impossible to look anywhere else but you. 
and when he removed them, showing you the mess you made, his popped them into his mouth. it was such a vulgar statement, but you found yourself blushing. he sucked on his fingers, letting them out with a pop, clean as a whistle. 
“heavenly.” he reaffirmed. “no girl compares.” 
you froze, still delirious from your orgasm, but it had you spinning in his hold. he was slightly blurred in your vision, but you could make out his faintly cocky expression. 
“really, huh?” 
your attitude would have him rising, cocky attitude falling away instantly. 
he gulped. “guess so.” was this it? 
a smile grew on your face. your hands wrapped around the back of his neck, grooming through the back of his head. he smiled lazily, lip catching between his top teeth. 
but things like this didn’t last forever, did they?
there was a pounding knock at the door. it had you frightened, shifting your panties back into their rightful place. your fingers fixed your appearance the best you could, whilst lando adjusted his dick in his pants. 
“open the fucking door, lando!” 
it was a woman’s voice. 
your brow raised. 
“i know you’re in there with that bitch,” the woman seethed. you could feel her anger through the door– but you could feel your own flying through the roof. bitch? you didn’t fucking think so. 
you pushed past lando who was about to open the door and he called your name, attempting to stop you. 
the door flew open. “bitch?”
the blonde girl stood there. she clearly didn’t expect you to open the door. but she didn’t back down; fine. 
“yeah. bitch.” you straighten your posture. “he told me not to worry about you–” what? “and here you are, fucking him.” 
not quite, you wanted to correct her. 
“fuck off,” he said the girl’s name. “me and you aren’t a couple.” but she rolled her eyes anyway. 
“you promised me a good fuck, lando,” she had such a venom to her bite. it had you bristle. “i didn’t think you’d stoop so low.” 
“hey, now, don’t be–” lando started, but you were done. you had enough of this night. you turned back into his apartment and grabbed your handbag, your phone, and threw on your heels. you didn’t hesitate brushing past the pair. 
lando called your name. 
but you only turned your head over your shoulder. your gaze read an entire sentence that he felt up his entire body. 
two can play this game. 
2K notes · View notes
murdockparker · 3 months
Text
Mr. Bridgerton and the Baker
Benedict Bridgerton x Reader
Summary: Covered in flour. It is how she usually spent her days, working hard at her family's bakery. She just hadn't expected to have met him in such a state.
Word Count: 11.8k
Warnings: pining, angst, fluff, a small assault (reader gets hit, not by Benedict!), mention of pregnancy (like, literally a line or two),
A/N: Did I write an entire fic barely based on that one scene in Camp Rock where Mitchie is covered in flour? Yes. Do I regret it? No.
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With the melting of snow and the promise of new starts, the social season was nearly upon the ton, nearly upon all the potential suitors and debutantes—all waiting with bated breath to secure a match this year. Of course, those in waiting were of high status, usually tied to the aristocracy or drowning in wealth beyond compare.
The others? The ones not blessed with endless funds or pure luck of royal lineage had the privilege, nay, honor to serve those who would be so fortunate. For the many, it included servicing the estates—butlers, lady’s maids, governesses, home chefs and the like. For the patrons on Tilbury Street, it included the less sought after roles, polishers, cobblers, modistes and bakeries. One bakery in particular was the prime choice for the aristocracy, a diamond in the rough as some may say. 
“I just simply don’t understand why we cannot have our chefs prepare the pastries for the ball,” Eloise Bridgerton nearly groaned, her arm hooked onto her mother’s. They had been walking up and down Tilbury Street for the better part of twenty minutes, simply enjoying the fresh spring weather. “I’ve never known them to make horrid dishes.”
“It’s the first Bridgerton Ball of the season, Eloise,” the dowager viscountess murmured politely. “Along with it being the first Kate has had the pleasure of hosting, putting an order in here is a fresh foot forward, one that’ll impress our guests.”
Eloise barked back a laugh. “If it is so important, why is Kate not here to make the order herself?”
“That, dear sister, is an excellent point.” Following close behind the two Bridgerton ladies was a rather tall shadow, equally as dashing and nearly as clever—Benedict—the second eldest son of the Bridgerton brood. “Surely Anthony could spare his wife for one afternoon, I can’t imagine it being so difficult to pry them from their bedroom—”
“Benedict Bridgerton!” Violet snapped, turning hot on her heels to face her son. He could only laugh.
“Oh Mother, you must relax,” he said lovingly, patting both hands on her shoulders. “You know better than I that it could have been a far fouler thought—why, I can easily imagine three other ways I could have expressed my way of thinking.”
“Ah, ever the poet, Benedict,” Eloise smiled wryly, pushing her way to the front of their clump. No one had the heart to mention the glaring fact that it was likely she didn’t know the way in which they were headed. 
“This bakery,” Violet continued half-heartedly. “Is a prestigious supplier for the ton—you may recall their exquisite cake that we had ordered for Daphne’s wedding.”
Benedict hummed contently. “It was a good cake,” he practically nodded off at the thought. The decadent sponge nearly brought him to tears—of course, it could have very well been the relief from undue stress of Daphne’s season altogether, having nearly lost his older brother to an unnecessary duel.
“I think it was far too sweet,” Eloise said, scrunching her nose in distaste. “I had to drink nearly three cups of tea to clear out the sugar on my tongue.”
“Ah, but what’s life without a little bit of sweetness?” Benedict nearly sang.
“Perfectly fulfilling,” his younger sister quipped back.
The dowager viscountess could only sigh, her eyes reaching up to the clouds above. While she loved nothing more than being the mother of all eight of her perfect children, their endless bickering and bantering grew vexing. It merely took the Bridgerton siblings another minute of arguing before stopping in front of a quaint storefront—the sickeningly sweet aroma filling the street. “We’re here.”
“I could have told you as much,” Benedict mumbled, rubbing his temple lightly. “The scent is… overpowering.” If he were lucky, the headache that was quickly forming would dull fast.
“But Benedict,” Eloise turned hot on her heels. “What’s life without a bit of sweetness?”
Violet Bridgerton was quick to catch her second eldest's hand before it met the back of Eloise’s head. “If it’s too much for you, dear,” she released her grip. “Please feel free to wait for us out here. It should only take a moment.”
“Like a ‘moment’ at the modiste?” Benedict crossed his arms, his brow nearly touching his hairline. “If I recall, the last time I accompanied you to the dressmaker, I spent over an hour basking in the summer sun.”
“Nothing logical stopped you from coming in,” Eloise drawled. “Of course, if you wanted to managed to stay pleasant with the seamstress, one should have kept it in his trousers—”   
“We’ll only be a moment,” Violet hushed Eloise quickly, grasping the top of her arm firmly. “There seems to be little wait. We’ll be on our way shortly.”
He huffed towards the sun—while there had been little heat near the start of the English spring, the sun was warm against his skin. Benedict enjoyed being outdoors more often than not, it was usually the reason he accompanied his mother on their errands nearly every other day of the season. That, of course, and the fact it got his worrying mama off of his back to be wed. With Anthony finally securing a match, it was only fitting for Violet Bridgerton to be working her way down her list of endless children—having only two of eight married off. “It should only be a moment,” Benedict reassured himself, watching various other families and couples walk by. 
That is, until he heard a rather loud bang coming from the alley beside him. He should have known better—he was taught better—than to investigate outlandish sounds, especially in town, but Benedict Bridgerton was nothing if not curious. He peeked around the corner, holding his breath, preparing to be met with a wild animal of some kind. His view was shaky at best, hardly could see a thing around the bricks. If he wanted a better look, he’d have to take a few steps towards the unusual noise. 
A large white cloud had enveloped the small alley, it was difficult to even see a few meters ahead, let alone what could have caused the loud commotion. Benedict waved his hand through the mysterious fog, trying to clear some air. “Hello?” He heard a soft squeak. An animal, it had to have been, Benedict was sure of it now. “Is anyone there?” 
A cough rang through the alley, startling him more than rogue vermin could have. The cloud had begun to dissipate, the white settling on the stone street below. Flour, if he had to guess, given the location.
“I’m alright,” a voice murmured quietly, another soft cough following quickly after. The shape of a person came into view, the air finally clearing enough for him to make sense of the scene he came upon. It was one of a woman now covered head to toe in the white powder—she had no distinguishable features, the flour was caking every bit of her body and dress. Just striking eyes that made Benedict’s heart jump to his throat. “Just… made a mess.”
“So it seems,” Benedict hummed, stepping over a pile of powder to get closer. “Do you require any help?”
“No, no,” she laughed. “I wouldn’t want you to get dirty. I fear I’ve got quite enough of that for the both of us.”
“I don’t mind getting dirty,” Benedict said quickly, his tongue moving faster than his brain. “But… yes, I suppose it’d be for the best if I refrained from getting any flour on me. May I ask how…?”
“Clumsy,” she uttered simply, the shrug of her shoulders speaking nothing but truth. “I must have the slipperiest fingers in town—I wish I could say this was the first time…”
“Manage to cover yourself in flour often?” Benedict’s lips pulled into a jesting smirk.
“Nearly every other day,” the woman sighed. “We’ve grown accustomed to purchasing an extra sack or two just for situations like these."
“I hardly doubt you could be that clumsy,” Benedict laughed, leaning against the stone wall. “But, I am painting quite the image in my head.”
“Oh I do hope I’m decent in that image, Mr. Bridgerton,” she giggled, curtsying in a near-mocking manner.
“How do you know—”
“Everyone knows your family, Mr. Bridgerton, I’d be a fool to admit I don’t know who you are—though you and your brothers all blur together, so I am merely taking a shot in the dark in which of the four you are.”
“Oh?”
She nodded once, a flurry of powder falling from her hair. A muffled shout from the back door startled her, grabbing her attention. “Ah,” the woman waved the air in front of her face, “I suppose I should take my leave—get cleaned up.”
“Of course,” Benedict said simply. “I won’t keep you.” In nearly an instant, the mysterious dusted lady disappeared from view, diving into the back door. He was taken aback by her candidness—having addressed him so forwardly without the pleasantries of a name exchange. “Damn,” he mumbled to himself, kicking residual flour off of his polished shoe, “I never asked for her name.” Would it be too forward to knock on the back door to ask for her? Benedict Bridgerton couldn’t wrap his head around the interaction—she nearly sent him into a tizzy.
“Brother?” 
Eloise stood at the end of the alley, clutch in hand, face pinched in confusion. 
“Ah, I suppose you’re finished?”
“Hardly,” Eloise scoffed, “Mother insisted on doubling the initial order ‘just to be safe’. She’ll be out in a moment.” 
“Perhaps I should go inside to accompany her—”
“And leave your unwed sister unchaperoned in this part of town?” Eloise pressed a hand to her brother’s chest, stopping him dead in his tracks. His eyes danced quickly to the street in the distance, clearly not paying any attention to his sister. “Benedict?”
“Hm?” He glanced down. “Ah, maybe we should both go back inside—”
“You’re…” she pushed on him harder, nearly sending him backwards. “Acting strange. Not terribly long ago you wanted nothing to do with this place and now, you’re dying to jump into the building that brought you so much strife?” Eloise removed her hand from him, settling it down by her side as she glanced at him up and down. The blues of his outfit were covered slightly in a white power—not enough to really notice, but enough to give the appearance of filth. “And you’re covered in… flour?”
“I don’t wish to share every moment of my day with you, dear Sister,” Benedict said simply, sighing contently. “My business is my business.”
“Business,” Eloise parroted. “Sure.”
Violet Bridgerton had finished the order quickly, mumbling something about the higher prices this time of year—she had gotten a good deal regardless. Benedict was hardly listening, for he was already planning his next trip to this very bakery, hoping to meet the girl in flour once more. 
He never did get the chance, to go back to town. His studies took up most of his free time, any other moment he had was spent with his ever-growing family. Just recently, his sister Daphne brought over her newest addition—another daughter named Belinda—who happened to be yet another spitting image of her mother. Benedict had a theory that every new Bridgerton baby will simply just inherit all the Bridgerton features, so far he had been proven correct. 
“Damn,” Benedict mumbled, violently dabbing a paint brush into his water cup, the colors swirling from the end.
He had been in his studio for the last few hours, mixing endless pigments and oils together, trying to concoct the color in his mind’s eye. It was impossible, he theorized, to create the exact shades and hues of her eyes. It was the most striking thing he remembered about her appearance—save for the copious amount of white flour caking her form—and Benedict Bridgerton had come to the conclusion that her eyes were simply forged by God Himself, a color not meant for mortal recreation.
“Why can I not…” He sighed, slumping back in his stool, paintbrush nearly hitting his trousers. “This is impossible.”
The grand clock beside the door chimed out. It was nearly time to get ready for Anthony and Kate’s ball—an occasion he was most dreading, save for enjoying the few pastries that came from the quaint bakery down in town. Reluctantly, he began to pry himself from his studio and made his way to the washroom, preparing to soak away any remnants of her.
“Mother,” (Y/N) chimed out, tying the serving apron to her waist, “I don’t see the reason for my attendance this evening. Surely the hosts of the event will have their own serving staff?”
“(Y/N),” her mother exasperated, throwing a towel down. “Your brothers are ill and bedridden and have been the last few days. Your father and I are counting on you to help fulfill the order, my back isn’t what it used to be, if you recall.”  
The girl sighed, her eyes rolling right up to the cracking ceiling. “How funny, it seems your back flares up nearly in time for deliveries to be made,” the girl mumbled.
“What was that?” Her mother turned quickly towards her only daughter. “I’m sure I misheard you.”
“You must have,” (Y/N) sang. “For I said I’m willing to help with the delivery, mother.”
The older woman narrowed her brow. “Never do I hear such sass from the boys… Perhaps a bit of manual labor will refocus your priorities.” 
“I already agreed,” (Y/N) reiterated. “As if I had terribly too much of a choice…”
“No,” her mother clicked, slapping the a rather large ball of dough that resided on the floured surface. “You do not. Now come, help your mother roll this out.”
She had gotten ready for the ball in record time—seeing as how she’s never gotten ready for one. (Y/N) dug through her mother’s wardrobe, finding an old and somewhat outdated green dress to wear, but it did the trick just fine. It was far nicer than the frocks she had owned anyhow, a light embroidery laced the edges and was sure to be run over by her fingertips endlessly throughout the evening.   
“The carriage is here!” Her father couldn’t have shouted louder throughout the small flat. Their home resided above the bakery, a quaint little thing with only two bedrooms—(Y/N) had the pleasure of sleeping in a rather over-glorified closet. If she reached her arms out, she’d be able to touch two of the walls easily, but like everything in her life, she made do. Unexpected child? Unexpected room. 
“I’ll be right there,” (Y/N) said, tying the now-cleaned apron around her waist, checking herself in the reflection of her water pitcher. “Damned hair,” her fingers moved to tuck a loose ringlet back into position—she had spent the better part of the evening trying to style it. 
“We need to load the carriage and make way to Bridgerton House,” her father repeated, smoothing his formalwear out. He hardly had the chance to wear it, seeing as situations like this happen only once in a while. “We must make a good impression, perhaps we’ll find more business this evening.”
“That’ll be a blessing,” her mother agreed, heading down the stairs to the bakery. “We could always use more business and the dowager viscountess is well liked around the ton, surely she’ll have pleasant things to say about our work.”
“I thought we let the pastries ‘speak for themselves’,” (Y/N) chimed in, carefully picking up a parcel. Her parents simply glared at her, allowing their daughter to silently move along with the loading process. 
The silence continued throughout the lengthy ride to Bridgerton House—the bakers not uttering a word until disembarking to unload all of the sweets. True to her original thought, the Bridgertons had their staff do the bulk of the unloading, carrying each parcel and box into the grand room that was to be the heart of the ball, all that was left to move was the elegant cake specially ordered by the dowager viscountess.
“Do you need a hand?”
“Oh, that would be—” (Y/N) turned around to the mysterious voice, only to find the same Bridgerton boy from earlier in the week standing behind her. “I—Mr. Bridgerton, I’m sure I can find my father to assist, you really don’t need to—”
“I insist,” Benedict held up his hand, effectively cutting her off. “I shouldn’t allow a lady to carry such a thing on her own, it would be most improper.”
“I’m certainly no lady,” she scoffed, readjusting her apron. “I’m not a part of your ‘season’ or whatever it is you lot do during the spring and summer months.”
Benedict barked out a laugh. “Debuted into the Marriage Mart or not, you’re still a lady and I am ever the gentleman, so please, indulge me.”
A blinding heat flushed across her cheeks—she was sure it was visible from down the street. (Y/N) stepped to the side to allow Benedict to grab ahold of one side of the tray, her hands curling around the other. “Thank you… for your help.”
“It’s no bother,” Benedict said truthfully. “I’ve been practically bored out of my skull all afternoon, this is truly the highlight of my evening.”
“Helping me carry a cake?” She asked, turning a corner carefully.
“Seeing you again,” he hummed unabashedly, noting the way her grip stiffened. “Though I must say, I think I prefer you without the flour.”
“How do you know that girl was me? I was covered head to toe.”
“Your eyes,” Benedict said simply. “They’re the most expressive and exquisite eyes I’ve had the pleasure of viewing.”
Benedict Bridgerton. The man who made her speechless.
“That, and I made a bold assumption when I saw you and the pastries arrive this evening.” He laughed lightly, afraid to drop the masterpiece. “I assumed correctly, no?”
“You,” (Y/N) tried to allow her cheeks to cool before continuing.“Would be correct. Very wise you are, Mr. Bridgerton.”
“Benedict.”
“Benedict,” she repeated softly, twisting herself to set the cake down on the table. “My apologies.”
The ballroom was grand—much nicer than any place she’d dream of residing in—delicate decorations hung from the sconces, flowers covered nearly every inch of the free space. It was, in every meaning, elegant. “This is… where you live?”
“Ah,” Benedict rubbed the back of his neck. “My brother has been kind to allow me to stay here since he married, seeing as I only have my own property in the country. But yes, this is one of the homes I grew up in.”
“One of the homes,” she repeated back to him. “And here I thought I was spoiled with my broom closet.”
He turned a vibrant shade of red. “Oh! I didn't mean to—”
Her laughter filled the ballroom, the lightness practically lifting Benedict upwards. “I was merely teasing. I’m well aware of your status and wealth, Mr. Bridgerton—” 
“Benedict.”
“Ah! Sorry,” (Y/N) felt the twinge of shame hit her chest, it was small but enough to keep her in line to avoid making the mistake again. “I meant it in jest.”
“Funny girl,” Benedict clicked, waving his finger lightly. “You’ve got quite a sense of humor.”
“Growing up with nothing more than sacks of flour and parcels of sugar allows one to get creative with her jokes,” she explained carefully, treading lightly as to not make it sound completely miserable. “Though, I think they were a better audience anyhow…”
“You wound me,” a hand grabbed his heart, knees buckling towards the ground. “Oh how the lady wounds me.”
“I believe I told you, Benedict, I certainly am no lady.”
“Well, the lady has neglected to give me her name,” he peeked up from the floor—having found quite a cozy position. “So how else should I address such a fair maiden?”
“Fair maiden,” she scoffed playfully, voice barely above a whisper. “Certainly am nothing close to a maiden… but, if you must know,” she paused, “my name is (Y/N), (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”
“(Y/N)…” Benedict repeated it, mostly to himself. He rose from the floor, eyes not leaving her own. “What a beautiful name.”
“I—thank you. I suppose you should give my parents such a compliment, though. I am simply the recipient of such a gift.”
“Well, when I ask your parents for permission to court their daughter, I’ll pass the message along.”
She froze. 
“Ah, what was that?”
“I hate to be so bold,” Benedict sighed, shoving a hand into his pocket. “But I feel the need to let you know of my intentions—my interest in you.”
“Oh you must be mistaken,” (Y/N) shook her head. “You’d want nothing to do with a girl like me. Surely there are other women in the ton who strike your fancy?”
“Nope,” he said simply. “Not a one. You, on the other hand, with your striking eyes and seemingly endless beauty, piqued my interest. If I may be honest, I haven’t stopped thinking about our encounter in the alley—it’s been on the forefront of my mind for days.”
She blinked, the gears in her head trying to keep up with the words Benedict was speaking. “But I am not from your world, Benedict. Even if I was interested in pursuing a courtship—”
“Are you not?” His eyes struck wide open. “I’m quite the catch, you see. Well-bred, scholarly and, if I might say so myself, I’m quite the talented artist. Easy on the eyes, too.”
“Benedict.” He stopped and looked at the woman. She was practically glowing in the candlelight. “While I’m not saying I’m… not interested, I can’t help but feel like you are infatuated with the idea of me and not… me.”
“How do you mean?”
She laughed humorlessly. “You don’t know me, truly. My likes, dislikes, how I take my tea, what weather I fancy—”
“See,” Benedict grabbed her hand, “I wish to know those things. Is that not the purpose of a courtship?”
“I am not from your world, Benedict. I have priorities, a duty to my family and our business—I can’t spend a moment thinking of the frivolity of a courtship with a man of your status.”
“But if I were, say, the butcher’s son it would be different?”
“Yes,” she removed her hand from his. “Of course it would be. I’m surprised you haven’t thought this through.”
“I have been thinking it through since we’ve met,” Benedict nearly spat, feeling anger bubble up in his chest. “I am not the type of man who wishes to court just anyone, you know.”
“So you wish to court me just because you can? Because how ever could I say no?”
“I—of course not!”
“We’re perfect strangers who shared a moment—albeit an endearing one—out in the middle of an alley. We both cleaned up and went about our lives,” she shook her head. “Nothing cosmic or magical about it.”
“I did not expect you to be so against the idea, unless… there’s another man of your affections?”
She groaned, pinching her nose. “No. No other man. Has a woman ever said no to you before, Mr. Bridgerton?”
He paused, clearly taken aback.
“Well,” she smoothed the tablecloth, the wrinkle in the bottom corner was annoying her, “let me be the first, then. No, I am not interested in a courtship, nor do I think I have any interest in a courtship—with you or anyone—so do not take it terribly too personally.” 
“Never? Don’t you plan to have a family of your own?”
“I already have a family,” she said simply. “I have no time for foolish ideas of having an adoring husband, three beautiful babies and a peaceful life out in the country.”
“That seems awfully specific—”
“No matter,” she waved. “Thank you for your interest, Mr. Bridgerton, I am flattered, truly.”
She walked away, hoping to hide in the carriage the rest of the night. Was she a fool? To turn down a courtship from such a sophisticated and notable man of the ton?
Benedict seemed to think so. True to her comment, he couldn’t recall a time in which a woman had rejected his advances—never in the name of a courtship, this would be his first—so to watch her walk away stung deeply, like a thorn to his heart. He was genuinely interested in the girl, he knew it. He just needed to prove it to her.
Days had passed since the Bridgerton ball and (Y/N) had successfully faked a stomach ache and ‘rested’ in the carriage until the night was over and done with. She was busy in the kitchen, working hard on a batch of fresh loaves for the storefront. Flour dusted her apron—the humor not lost on her—as she thought more and more about Benedict’s proposal. 
The bell to the shop rang out, her brother’s voice gave a muffled greeting, nothing out of the ordinary for a regular day at the bakery. It was calming, to work with the dough, taking virtually nothing and creating something delicious was soothing to her soul. She continued to knead the dough, working it like clay against her palms before the door to the back swung wide open.
“(Y/N), I do believe you have a visitor,” Harry, her second eldest brother smirked. He had finally recovered enough to help around the shop again, much to their mother’s delight. “One of the gentlemen variety, if you must know.”  
She stopped dead in her tracks.
“Did he give you a name?”
“Only asked for you,” Harry shrugged. “I figured you must’ve been expecting him,” he walked closer to her, taking over the kneading, “brought you flowers and looks rather fancy.”
She wiped her hands off on the already soiled apron, clapping her hands once for good measure. “Don’t over-work those, I’ll shove your face into the oven.”
Harry’s laugh rang out through the kitchen as she braved the door to the store. She knew it was inevitable, to expect him to come and try to woo her again, though she wasn’t expecting it so soon. The door felt rough against her palms, swinging wide open to the storefront. Sure enough, a one Benedict Bridgerton was standing by the counter, eyeing the various loaves on display. 
“Ah, Miss. (Y/L/N),” Benedict said, almost bowing. “I’m delighted you could join me.”
“Mr. Bridgerton,” (Y/N) smiled sickeningly sweet, forced beyond all measure. “What a… surprise.”
“A wonderful one, I presume?” He jested. Her eyes found the colorful bouquet quickly, she was trying her hardest to not make eye contact. It was ornate—fancy, just like her brother said—decked out in a healthy mix of wild blooms and expensive looking flowers. “Ah! My apologies, these are for you,” Benedict said, lifting the bouquet across the counter. 
She reluctantly took them, cradling the bunch as if it were a newborn babe. “Thank you, Mr. Bridgerton.”
He swallowed thickly at the formality of his name, but bit his tongue. “I must say, you looked exquisite at the ball, but I think your natural element suits you more favorably, why, you’re practically glowing.” Benedict pointed to her floured apron and messy frock, having been in the kitchen all morning. “Less flour than the first time.”
Her grip tightened around the bouquet. “Is there anything I can help you with? Perhaps another order for your mother?”
The man shook his head, laughing lightly. “No, no order. I just wished to see you.” The bluntness of his answer nearly shocked her, but the effect wore quickly.
“Perhaps I wished the opposite?”
“Oh, my dear,” Benedict practically mewled. “If that were true, you wouldn’t have come out here in the first place, now would you?”
Like a gaping trout, she had no reply. Perhaps he was right. She didn’t have to come out to the front of the store, the gnawing curiosity got the better of her and practically pulled her through that door. 
“If you are here to try to get me to change my mind—”
“I wish to spend the afternoon with you.”
She blinked.
“Just one afternoon, allow me to try and prove how serious I am about courting you,” Benedict said earnestly. “After that, if you are still of the same mind, I will never bother you again. You have my word.”
Hesitantly, she lowered the bouquet, her shoulders slumping. She was thinking so hard about his offer, Benedict swore he could see steam rising from her ears. “I… cannot just leave the bakery, it’s my family’s livelihood—”
“I’ll buy the lot,” Benedict said, pressing a handful of coins onto the counter top. “Sell me whatever it is you make in a day—a small price to pay for a moment of your time.”
“You cannot simply throw your money at things and expect it to always work out for you, Mr. Bridgerton,” she said sternly, eyeing the sack of coins longingly. She would be kidding herself if the offer didn’t sound appealing. “I am no woman on the corner, you cannot buy my time.”
“Then consider it a tip,” Benedict hummed, pushing the bag closer to her. “For your excellent service at the Bridgerton ball. Nothing nefarious, nothing expected of you. Just a man buying some bread.”
“Loads of bread,” (Y/N) mumbled, quickly calculating how many loaves he truly was willing to walk out with. The amount of money was unclear, but if she had to wager, he practically bought out the whole storefront. Her parents would be thrilled—they could even take a rare day off, just because their daughter spent the afternoon with a practical stranger. “Fine. One afternoon.”
The glee that washed across his body did not go unnoticed, he practically lit up the room with his joy.
“You won’t regret this,” he said seriously. “Trust that my intentions are pure and—”
“—honest and true,” she droned, finishing his thought. “Yes, yes, I understand.”
Benedict nodded. “Right. Well, shall we?”
“Will you allow me a moment to change? I do not think you wish to spend your day with a girl caked in flour.”
“Funny enough, I wouldn’t have it any other way,” he grinned. She was unamused. “But, if you insist.”
It didn’t take long for her to clean up, a change in her frock and a readjustment to her hair was all that was needed. She found herself staring in her mirror a bit longer than usual, taking in her features. Could he really be interested in her? He seemed so taken by her looks when she herself considered them… so plain. She shook her head, effectively jumping out of her haze and proceeded to head back downstairs to meet her suitor for the afternoon. 
“Perhaps you were right,” Benedict said softly. “This may be your best look to date.”
A heat warmed her cheeks and it wasn’t the summer sun. “Flattery will get you nowhere, Mr. Bridgerton—” 
“Ah!” Benedict waved a finger. “If we are to spend the afternoon together, I insist you call me by my given name.”
Her lips pressed together in protest. “If you insist—”
“Oh and I do, my darling,” Benedict nearly sang.
“Benedict,” she corrected. “What sorts of plans do you have for this afternoon? Surely you did not produce such a grand gesture only to leave our day up to chance.”
“I am feeling quite parched,” Benedict said, almost ignoring her comment. “Care for a spot of tea?” In their walk down the street, he had managed to stop right in front of a quaint little tea shop. She hardly noticed.
“And if I do not care for tea?”
“I hear they have excellent scones and biscuits,” Benedict countered. “Surely not sweeter than you, but delicious all the same.”
“Sweeter than my scones, you mean?”
Benedict raised a brow, puckering his lips lightly. She heard him correctly the first time. “So. Tea?”
They sat at a small table near the back of the shop, a hot pot of herbal tea sat between them. It looked entirely domestic, a pot of tea shared between lovers, any onlooker could have deduced as much.
“Pass the honey?” (Y/N) pointed to the small jar next to Benedict’s hand. He nodded and pushed it closer to her.
“You take your tea with honey?” He probed.
“Herbal tea, yes,” she confirmed, stirring a spoonful into her cup. “If it is black tea, a healthy amount of milk is entirely welcomed in my drink, no sugar.”
“Interesting,” Benedict said, watching her intently stir the honey until it dissolved into the hot liquid. “I prefer plain black tea myself, though occasionally my brother Colin will bring exquisite teas from his travels across the seas.”
“And Colin is which brother?” The question slipped out quickly, she hardly noticed she had asked.
“One of my two younger brothers,” Benedict smiled gently. “Not much younger than I, but I do have a few years on him, not as many as I have on Gregory, of course. He’s practically the babe of the family—save for sweet Hyacinth.”
“Eight children…” She thought aloud. “Were your parents working towards a record number?”
“I always jest that they wished to complete the entire alphabet,” Benedict mused. “But, alas, twenty six seems a bit much.” He took a sip of his tea, enjoying the lingering aroma. “So, you know there are eight of us?”
“Everyone knows your family,” she said simply. “Do not flatter yourself.”
“Of course,” he hummed into his cup, a smile brewing from his lips. “You have siblings, yes? I believe I met your brother earlier.”
“Two older brothers,” (Y/N) groaned lightly. “Jack and Harry, the latter being the one you met. They are… oh how do I put this? Exceptionally irritating.”
Benedict laughed into his drink. “Sounds quite a lot like my siblings.”
“My parents expect Jack to take over the bakery,” she explained quietly, her voice lowering. “But he has no desire to bake whatsoever. He can hardly make a sponge cake.”
“And a sponge cake is…?”
“One of the most basic cake recipes a baker can learn,” she continued. “I usually end up being the one who pulls the slack Jack creates.”
“And Harry?”
“When he isn’t galavanting across town with the ladies of the night, he is holed up in his room doing Lord knows what. Certainly nothing that helps the family business.”
“You care a lot about your family and the business,” Benedict said, stating what is clearly the obvious. “Surely your parents see it too?”
“Oh no,” she shook her head wildly. “That is the most asinine part of the ordeal! They simply do not see me as an asset to the bakery—something that should rightfully be mine should the time come.” She sighed, throwing her head into her hands. “But, I am expected to keep my head down and decorate cakes like a good girl.”
“You say that as if you are their pet,” Benedict scoffed lightly. “Do they truly expect such obedience from you?”
“I wasn’t wanted,” she said simply. “My parents merely wanted a son to take over the business—Jack, he’s the oldest. Good for nothing, as it turns out. Harry was to have an extra set of hands around the bakery, but now he’s their prodigal child. Me? I was shacked with an over glorified closet for a room because there truly was no space for me.” She sniffled. “At least they got a decorator out of it.”
Benedict tentatively put his hand on her shoulder, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “You’re more than a decorator. Surely your parents see that too?”
“They’ll see some use of me when I get home,” she said into her cup. “Seeing as you bought out our store just to spend a measly few hours with me. I’m sure that in of itself is worth having an accidental daughter.”
Benedict all but scoffed at this. “You cannot be serious.”
“Not everyone comes from loving families that wish to do nothing more than pop out babies left and right,” (Y/N) deadpanned, placing her cup back on the table. “If it were truly up to my parents, they would’ve stopped after Jack. But, much like the society you come from, an heir and a spare, I suppose.”
“And you?” Benedict almost felt afraid to ask. 
“It’s like you said,” she finished her cup of tea. “I am simply a pet.”
Benedict was never one for fights, but he suddenly had the urge to put his fist through a handful of faces in that moment. “That’s awful.” It was all he could say. 
“That’s life,” she shrugged, picking up a biscuit and examining it closely. Her nose scrunched. “If you were trying to gain my favor, perhaps you should’ve taken me somewhere with better biscuits. It’s insulting to a baker to see such poorly made ones, especially in a place like this.”
He knew she was trying to change the subject. “I shall do better next time.”
“Yes, I suppose you—” she stopped. “That was a rotten trick and you know it.”
“I am certainly no magician, (Y/N),” Benedict finished his tea, hiding the most devilish of smiles from behind the cup. “But seeing as we’re finished with our pot, perhaps we can take a turn about the park?”
“You’d risk public outcry and a scandal for being seen with a commoner in the park?” (Y/N) asked, pulling herself from her seat. “What would Lady Whistledown say?”
“You know of Lady Whistledown?”
“Everyone knows of Lady Whistledown,” she scoffs. “I may not have the pleasure to afford her column every time she publishes, but occasionally our regulars will leave their pamphlet for me once they’re finished.”
“Only read the good bits, I take it?”
“As much as I don’t understand the world you come from, Benedict, reading Whistledown helps me fill the gaps I am so obviously lacking. Truly, even if I did grow up in your society, I doubt I’d be able to understand much more than I do now anyway.”
“I reckon you’re right,” Benedict said, a laugh escaping through his nose. “I’m not one for society anyway—never cared much for it.”
“Surely news of this would cause a scandal, though?”
“News that I am simply walking in the park with a friend? Oh how the newsboys will have trouble selling that story,” Benedict mused, leaning down towards the lady. “Perhaps if we were seen doing something less proper, I suppose. Do you wish to be doing something less proper, (Y/N)?”
She didn’t dignify his question with a response, though, the rouge on her cheeks was answer enough.
It only took a handful of minutes to walk to the park, the tea shop was so close already. How convenient.
The other ladies in the park, the ones of a more genteel breeding, they were dressed finer than anything (Y/N) could have put on. She felt out of place. She usually did, of course, but something about her outdated frock in contrast to how striking Benedict looked and dressed? It felt rather foolish. 
Perhaps it was the notoriety of the Bridgerton walking beside her, or the self consciousness of being underdressed enough to catch the eyes of anyone walking past, but it felt like she was a spectacle—something in a museum or on display. She was holding bright light, nearly shouting at everyone that she was not enough, not worthy to be in this park, let alone with this man.
“I am tired of walking,” (Y/N) said suddenly. 
“We have only just begun,” he laughed. “But if you require a respite—”
“Let’s sit,” (Y/N) said just as quickly, practically running to the edge of the pond. Perfectly out of sight to everyone.
“How secluded,” Benedict mused. “I daresay, I never thought you’d be so agreeable—”
“Hush,” (Y/N) admonished, holding a finger up. “I am simply in need of a break—away from prying eyes.”
Benedict nodded, not daring to pry further. He watched her slump to the ground, her dress skirt billowing around her like a cloud before settling to the gravity. He continued to stand. “I rather like this park.”
“A park is a park.”
“Have you been before?”
“Here?” She shook her head. “Obviously not.”
“My family, we would come to London during the social season,” Benedict explained. “Our usual residence is out in Kent—anyhow, my father had this spectacular notion to come to the park every week as a family. Looking back, it was probably to save face and show a united Bridgerton front.”
She looked up at Benedict, who was currently plucking a few leaves off of the low hanging branches of the tree. “Sounds wise.”
“He was the wisest,” Benedict agreed. “Keeping the ever-growing number of Bridgerton children entertained became a sport. Anthony, Colin and I were always squabbling, drove my mother rightfully insane, so, my father had a bright idea.”
“Paste your lips together?” She offered. 
Benedict knelt down, close to the edge of the water. “No, but I do not doubt that idea crossed their minds,” he laughed, bringing the leaves in his hands to view, “my father suggested racing.”
“Horse racing?”
He shook his head. “We’d each pick a leaf and follow it to the other edge of the pond—kept us entertained for hours, running back and forth to reset our leaves and chase them down.”
“Smart man,” she hummed, genuinely impressed by the late viscount’s cleverness.
“So, pick your contender,” Benedict said softly, displaying the spare leaves like cards in a deck. 
“You are serious?”
“Dead serious, I’m afraid,” Benedict clicked, pushing his hand a bit closer to her. “Come on, humor me.”
She looked down at the leaves and back up at Benedict, his blue eyes rivaling the color of the pond. Taking an interest in the middle leaf—it was the longest and skinniest—she plucked it from his fingers. “This one.”
“Excellent choice,” Benedict said cheerily, dropping the other leaves. “I am more inclined to a smaller one—seems they move faster down the shore.”
“Size isn’t everything, Mr. Bridgerton,” (Y/N) crossed her arms, resting them on her knees. She would never dare to admit it out loud, but she was having a bit of fun.
“Ah, perhaps not,” Benedict jested with her, her jab not even shocking him in the slightest. “But, I reckon it will be a close match regardless.”
After insuring that the lovely lady in his company was watching his movements closely, he set the leaves down on the surface of the water. “Finish line is by that tree over there,” he pointed, finally letting go with his other hand.
“May the best leaf win,” she giggled. Giggled? Good Lord. A crooked grin cracked on his face, focused too intently at the company rather than the match at hand. “Are you not going to chase them?”
“And leave you?” He scoffed. “Perish the thought.”
“I just thought,” her gaze was caught on the leaves, still floating down the edge of the pond—slower than she anticipated, “well, I suppose I wanted to get the whole picture of your family tradition.”
“Shall I run along the coast, then?” Benedict asked playfully, rising back to his feet, thumb pushed towards the water. 
“Only to humor me,” she shrugged, not even fighting the smile on her face. 
“Well, in that case,” Benedict began to remove his jacket, throwing it beside her. With a light jog he caught up to the leaves, they hadn’t gone very far anyway, perhaps if it were a windier day he’d have a faster time to keep up with. “You are in the lead!” He called out. 
“Brilliant!” Her hands were clasped around her mouth, a cone to help amplify her shout. His smile was like the sun, warm and inviting—she wished she could spend the day in such a warmth. Benedict practically jumped for joy when the leaves made it to the final stretch, crossing to the rocks on the shore. Nearly falling into the water, he managed to scoop the leaves up and jog back to the woman in the grass. “Well?”
“Well, what?” He asked, nearly out of breath, smile still pulling his lips upward. 
“The winner?”
“Ah,” he fell to the ground, sitting comfortably next to the baker’s daughter, pocketing the leaves. “A secret.”
“So you lost?”
“Oh, I assure you, if you won I would be celebrating you until the end of our time together,” Benedict sang. “However…”
“I lost?” She scoffed. 
“A gentleman is humble in his successes,” he explained carefully. “We could go again?”
“No,” she said, humor in her voice. “I think that was more than enough excitement for one afternoon.”
“For once, we agree,” he said. “May I…? Could I ask you a question?”
“If you are proposing marriage, I am afraid I’ll have to decline—”
“No, no,” he laughed heartily. “Nothing of that sort.”
“I suppose I could find it in myself to answer a different question, then.”
“You were cold to me this morning,” Benedict noted, twirling a blade of grass between his fingers. “But not on the day we met. What changed?”
She sighed, pulling her knees to her chest, gaze locked out on the now setting sun. “I… am not entirely sure.”
“Surely it was not the leaves—”
“The leaves may have helped,” she admitted. “Humanized you, in a way.”
“Was I inhuman before?”
“Naturally,” she retorted. “I mean, is it not obvious?”
“You were protecting your feelings,” Benedict finally realized. “All this time. You did not wish to be hurt—truly afraid I was merely stringing you along as an elaborate prank or ruse? Is that right?”
“How could someone like you ever have an interest in a pauper like me? The baker’s daughter and the son of a viscount?” Tears dotted her eyes, threatening to fall. How she came so close to crying was beyond her. “It seems implausible.”
Benedict dropped the grass, fully looking at the lady beside him. She had made herself nearly as small as she felt. He had hit the nail on the head. A gust of wind blew by, bringing leaves down from the tree above. 
“I do not think less of you because of whose daughter you are,” Benedict said softly, removing a stray leaf from her hair. His fingers guided her head towards him, begging for her to look his way. “I care only about you. Getting to know you. Frankly, your father seems like a mostly alright man, but I do not wish to know him the way I wish to know you.”
“You may wish for that,” she sniffled. “But what would the rest of your world think? You, trying to court a woman below your status—”
“The only people who should be caring so deeply about my potential courtship are my intended and me,” Benedict said sharply. “The rest of the ton can frankly kiss my rear end.”
This raised a laugh out of her. It was bubbly and pure, almost like the one of a child. “You truly don’t care what people think about you?”
“No,” he shook his head. “I do not.”
“How freeing that must be,” she said. 
“Being the second son has its perks,” Benedict looked at her, really looked at her. “No one expects me to be proper all the time. I am given the freedom—financially and otherwise—to do as I please. I do not have to worry about inheriting a title, siring heirs, that is my brother’s responsibility.”
“Why me?”
His head quirked. “I do not understand?”
“You could court any girl of the ton,” she said. “And I am sure more than half of them would never turn down a chance to be courted by a Bridgerton—”
“They wished for the title,” Benedict sighed. “To be Viscountess Bridgerton, to marry my older brother and have the notoriety. That ship has already sailed, I'm afraid. You are kind in thinking that many women would be after me though.”
“You are not ugly,” she listed, “you have a great humor about you, a pleasant demeanor and a kindness in your eyes. The women of the ton must be foolish, then.”
“Perhaps the foolish one is you?”
“I beg your pardon?”
“You truly think those things about me?” He asked, awaiting a response. Her jaw was slack, clearly not about to give him any sort of confirmation to his question. “I believe your words, I do. But perhaps you should look at yourself with such eyes?”
“I-I don’t understand—”
“Our class differences aside,” Benedict said, as if it was easy to just ignore that, “while I was taken by your beauty at first—your eyes are something the Gods themselves forged in the fires, stars rivaling their shine—it was your continuous personality that kept my attention. Granted, it helped you were once covered head-to-toe in flour, it really brought out your features.”
Her cheeks flared at the recollection of their first meeting. “It was not my finest moment.”
“And you were vulnerable all the same,” he continued. “You cared not for who I was, yet, you showed an interest in me anyway. You may not agree with that statement, but you and I know it to be true in some shape or form. The only thing that holds you back is this notion on our classes—”
“Perhaps I am interested in you,” (Y/N) cut him off. “Perhaps I wish to be courted by you, attend balls and dress in pretty gowns, drinking expensive drinks and whispering sweet nothings. But that is all that it is—a wish. I know my place in this world, it is a right shame you have such a fantasy about yours.”
“(Y/N)…”
“No,” she stood up, brushing the blades of grass and leaves off of her skirt. “I hoped that you would understand, Benedict. I agreed to this afternoon because it felt like I had no choice in the matter—you practically bought my time, after all. What I did not expect,” she hiccuped, “I did not expect that I would enjoy such an afternoon.”
“You enjoyed yourself,” Benedict rose to his feet, desperate to match her gaze head on. “Why can you not allow yourself to have that joy? Allow your heart to follow its call?”
“I do not have such liberties to listen to my heart,” (Y/N) said softly. “I must use my head for every choice I make. An afternoon with you allowed my family to have enough money to make it through the end of the season without going hungry—”
“And an afternoon with me has brought such happiness to fill your soul for much longer—”
“Happiness has little importance,” she scoffed. “I would rather see my family healthy and surviving than even think about a notion like happiness or joy.”
“You have said yourself that your family treats you like a pet,” Benedict took a deep breath, trying to regain his composure. He needn’t explode in the park. “Why do you care so much about them if they care so little for you?”
“Because it is all that I know!” The candle had finally reached its end, burning out with a sizzle. “All I have ever known is my life in the bakery, rising early to make the dough, peddling samples to those walking by and hoping—praying—that they step in our store and purchase something. Because a sale of a few loaves of bread or cakes meant we could afford to buy vegetables for a soup, something to eat with our days old bread.”
“If you were with me, you wouldn’t ever need to think about things like that again,” Benedict said, his voice wavering on a whisper. “I could support you, support your family.”
“And that is precisely why I do not wish to continue this,” she raised her finger. “I do not need an affluent man to come and save me—”
“But I could help—”
“I do not need your help!”
“You obviously do!”
She took a step back, the tears from before finally reappearing in her eyes. “O-obviously? Because I am of a lower class you believe, in that giant and empty head of yours, that you can simply win my favor by saving me? Offering riches and experiences that I should be grateful and thanking every God that will listen that you are even willing to give me?”
“You know that is not what I meant—” 
“You believe that because you are who you are, and I am who I am, that I couldn’t possibly say no to you,” her gaze flicked with anger, a fire looming. “While the ladies of the ton have their choices, I do not, so it makes it easy for you to pine over someone who simply has no choice in the matter.”
“No—(Y/N)—”  
“This afternoon has been lovely,” (Y/N) spat, looking to the skyline—the sun had finally set, “but I am afraid that the afternoon is over. I shall be taking my leave.”
“Please reconsider,” Benedict begged, willing to try anything to get her to stay. “I wish to know you.”
“A shame, then,” (Y/N) said, turning around. “Wishing for something so foolish.”
“Her head is in the clouds,” Jack whispered.
“No, I reckon her head is in the dough,” Harry mumbled back to his brother. 
“I can hear you, you know,” (Y/N) ground out, working hard on a rather unruly clump of dough that simply would not cooperate. “And if I can hear you, you are close enough to be helping.”
“But that is so exhausting," Harry groaned, leaning against the countertop. “Besides, how are you ever going to impress your betrothed if you do not keep such toned arms?”
She threw the dough against the counter—hard. “He is not my betrothed.”
“But you wish for him to be, no?” Jack giggled, playing with a few burnt buns—a mishap of his own creation.
“I say, Sister,” Harry said. “Why do you not pursue that Bridgerton? He clearly is interested in you, or, have you forgotten all of the flowers he has sent?”
The front of the shop was practically a florist’s dream—covering every free inch of counter space with beautiful bouquets. Her mother simply refused to throw out such lovely blooms, even going so far as to fish the first one out of the trash after her daughter made quick work to dispose of it. “How could I possibly forget about the man who continuously flaunts his wealth to get what he wants?”
“He wants you, surely that is not lost on you?”
“Of course not,” she continued to knead, a few hairs falling into her face. “But he is so insistent on getting me to agree to his whims simply because—”
“He has money, (Y/N),” Jack scoffed. “Good money. Christ, you spent half of a day with him a few weeks ago and we were able to finally purchase meat for dinner. Imagine if you married him—”
“So you want your sister to be married off for your own financial gain?”
“What else would you marry for?” Harry laughed. “Love?”
She stopped kneading. “Why do you not go and try to marry a wealthy lady, then? Hm? Surely a woman of genteel breeding would be much taken by the idea of a rugged baker—”
“That Bridgerton is already interested,” Harry shrugged. “At the very least, if you end up with child he would provide enough funds—”
“First you wish to marry me off, now you wish for me to have his bastard?” She couldn’t help but laugh, ignoring her hard work on the counter. “Why can I not make my own choice? I do not wish to be with Mr. Bridgerton, I wish to stay here at the bakery.”
“Fucking stupid,” Jack scoffed. “If I were in your shoes, I would let the gentleman pay for anything my heart desires—forget about this wretched place and move on with my life.”
“And abandon our legacy?”
“You mean my legacy,” Jack corrected. “I am to inherit the bakery, it is my birthright. You? I suppose I will allow you to continue your grunt work here—” 
“Who else will do the baking?” Her voice rang throughout the kitchen. “Mother and Father are nearing the end of their career, both becoming too frail to continue with the rigorous task of this place. I am the only one—the only competent member of this family who can keep this shit afloat! And you want me to just… give that up?”
Jack stood a little straighter. “It was never your place.”
“Harry is set to inherit the bakery now, you know it. Yet someone had to fill the shoes of the family fuck-up instead, no?” 
It was a sharp pain, suddenly and all at once against her cheek. It took her only half a second later to realize what had happened, her other brother’s face was only a confirmation on the fact.
“Jack, what the hell?!” Harry practically screamed. “You hit her?”
“She insulted me!”
“You deserved it,” Harry said, pushing his older brother back. “She only spoke the truth—”
“So I am allowed to be walked over by my baby sister?” Jack scoffed, pushing Harry back. “A woman? No fucking chance, mate.”
Her hand had covered her cheek, already feeling warm to the touch. Everything was too much, too loud, too bright. She had to get out of there, had to forget all about the dough on the counter, forgetting all about the brother who had just smacked her silly. The back door wasn’t locked—no surprise as Jack was the last one to use it—making it easy for her to push into the alleyway and into the rain. 
Rain. 
Pelting like bullets, the wet drenched her clothing in a mere instant, making it harder to escape. Where had she planned to run anyway? She had nowhere to go, her entire world was contained to the four walls of the bakery, never daring to explore the rest of it, not when her world was already so encompassing, so inviting. 
In theory, anyway, it seemed.
So, she ran. A mix of running and walking, she kept moving forward. By the time she left her part of town, she knew her brothers would not bother coming for her. The rain alone was a deterrent, even Harry, the one who loved her more, wouldn’t dare to brave the elements just to reel his sister’s whims in. 
A splotch of purple entered her vision. How long had she been moving? Did she even expect to come here? Did her subconscious send her in this direction for a reason?
She knocked on the bright door before she could find out.
“Good evening, ma’am,” a butter said politely. “What business do you have?”
“I am here to call upon Benedict Bridgerton.”
His quill had soaked the parchment below with ink, having left the tip upon it for far too long. He had been lost in thought, contemplative, especially the last few weeks. Benedict knew he had hurt her, had insulted her very being, yet he still tried. Every other day he’d send a fresh bouquet to the bakery, a new poem attached to the stems. Perhaps she read them? He knew it was more likely that she burned them, in the ovens or otherwise. 
At the very least, he knew that the blooms were being displayed at the shop. Hope. That is what it had given him.
“Mr. Bridgerton, you have a caller,” a butler knocked, opening his door a crack wider.
“A caller? In this weather?”
“She seemed rather insistent,” the butler shrugged. “She is waiting in the drawing room—I already sent for tea and towels for the lady.”
“A lady is here to see me?” Benedict quirked his brow.
“A Miss. (Y/L/N),” the butler said. “No calling card, soaked to the bone and she seemed a bit… out of sorts.”
Benedict had already risen from his desk, practically pushing past the staff member to reach the stairs. Missing a step or two, he made it to the drawing room and shoved the door open. In the center of the blue room was (Y/N), dripping onto the wooden floor, shaking like a leaf.
“(Y/N)…” 
“I-I had nowhere else to go,” she began to explain. “I did not even realize I was here until I knocked on the door. It was foolish—”
“No,” Benedict shook his head, reaching to take her hand in his own. “It is quite alright. You are more than welcome to be here.”
His hands were warm, or perhaps she was just that cold, making them feel like a fire. “I am so sorry, Benedict.”
“For what?” He asked genuinely. 
“Everything?” She offered. “I-I am not sure of what, exactly, but I feel that I need to apologize.”
“You needn’t apologize for anything,” he said. “Not with me, not ever.”
She looked up at the ceiling, afraid to make contact with his blue stare. “I needed to get away. My brother he—Jack hit me.”
Benedict froze, his entire body went rigid. “I’ll kill him.”
“I suppose I deserved it,” she shrugged, now looking at the ground. “Talking back to him, assuming things that could never be—” 
“A man has assaulted you,” Benedict squeezed her hand tighter. “Brother or not, he put his hands on you. You did nothing of the sort to deserve such a thing.”
“I don’t think I can go back there,” (Y/N) said softly. “Perhaps this was just the moment that gave me clarity. Opened my eyes, so to speak.”
Benedict took a good look at her face, red and splotchy, whether it was from the smack or the tears, he could not tell. “Tea is on the way, I shall request a cold compress for your cheek—”
“I do not wish to impose.”
“You shall wish for nothing here,” Benedict said quietly, firmly. “You will stay until the rain lets up, or, you provide me with a suggestible plan for your next steps.”
“I cannot go back,” she finally looked up at Benedict. “As much as I would like to, I simply cannot.”
“If you do not want to go back, I will support you. If you want to leave town, the country even, I will support you,” he said seriously. “Please allow me to support you.”
“I could never ask you for that—”
“You are not asking, I am offering,” he clarified. 
“Benedict…”
The rain seemed to lessen, if the pelting against the window had anything to say about it. The noise had dimmed, not as violent as before. “To know that you are safe, that you are cared for, that is all I care about.”
So, in the center of the blue Bridgerton drawing room, soaked to the bone and dripping all over the floor, she kissed him. It was a sudden thing, pulling him down towards her lips, the contact much quicker than she had expected. He returned the favor in kind, wrapping his arms around her and holding her tight, kissing her in a way he had yet to truly experience. 
If his hands were like a fire, his lips were an inferno. Fighting for dominance, it was all encompassing. How had she gone so long without a feeling such as this? The burn was coming from inside, not a superficial one atop her skin as she was quite used to, but this burn, this feeling, she could find herself craving this. 
“I-I am sorry—” she pulled away.
“Never be sorry,” Benedict shook his head. “Not for that, not ever.”
“I should not have done that…”
“No,” he agreed, a chuckle leaving his lips, “but how exhilarating it felt, regardless.”
His thumb ran lazy circles on her jaw. She leaned into the touch. “I do not know what to do, where to go…”
“But you cannot stay here…?”
She smiled sadly. “You know me scarily well, Benedict.”
He thought for a moment. “So… leave.”
“Excuse me?”
“Leave town, leave the country—”
“I do not have the means to do such a silly thing.”
“I will pay your way.”
She scoffed, trying to pull out of his embrace. He wouldn’t release his grip. “Benedict…”
“I told you, I wish to support you. Emotionally, financially, I want to be there for you,” Benedict said. “Even if we are not—if you do not want to be together romantically, I want to ensure your safety and your health, your well-being. A friend.”
She tried to find the lie in his eyes, in his tone. Coming up empty, she had no excuse to not believe him. 
“France,” he said, as if struck by lightning.
“France?”
“I hear only the expert bakers study in France—I have no doubts you could go to learn,” he explained. “I could pay for your travel, housing, you name it. Ask for it, and it is yours.”
“I doubt anyone would want to teach a woman, no matter how lovely a thought it might be.”
“I have a cousin,” Benedict explained. “Her and her husband own a café—I am quite certain that they would love to hire an expert baker to add to their inventory and menu. You could earn your own income, make your own way. A fresh start.”
“A fresh start…” she repeated. “That sounds too good to be true.”
“I shall write to her in the morning,” Benedict said, holding her hands again. 
“And you…?”
“I will only come with you if you want me to join,” Benedict said slowly. “I will not trap you. I want your happiness, your freedom.”
She nodded, understanding.
“I think France sounds nice,” she smiled. “Will you write to me?”
“Every chance I get.”
“Even if you are vexed with me?”
“Especially if I am vexed with you.”
She kissed his lips again, sweeter and softer than the first time.
“Sounds perfect.”
A year. An entire year had passed and she couldn’t recall a happier time in her life. The only time that something could have rivaled it was a visit to a tea shop followed by a respite by a pond—in handsome company all the while. 
They kept correspondence, just like they promised. Every week came a new letter, a new story to be told by the poetic Benedict Bridgerton. She tried to rival his words, explaining every detail about France, about her new life, but something was nagging. She missed him. They had grown close over the correspondence, leaving her heart wanting more. But, she knew when she left for France it was to fulfill her dreams, leaving a foolish notion like love on the back burner.
“(Y/N),” Marie, the Bridgerton cousin, called out behind her. “We are in need of more buns.”
“I just restocked the buns,” (Y/N) giggled, turning to the blonde. “What? Has someone mysteriously bought the lot?”
“Oui,” Marie said with a jest, heading into the storage room, “perhaps you should go bring more out?”
“You are in luck, the last batch just finished resting from the oven,” she said, carrying a tray on her shoulder, “I will bring them out with haste.”
“I am sure he will appreciate it.”
(Y/N) faltered, hand already pressed to the door leading to the front shop. A tingle ran through her spine, her heart picking up to a freeing flutter. 
Could it be?
“You know, I would buy your entire stock,” the man hummed, looking thoughtfully into the display case, “but I fear I would be recreating a rather taxing memory for the both of us.”
“Benedict,” she gasped, nearly dropping her tray. 
“You look radiant,” he mused, that wicked grin of his breaking on his face. “Much like the first time I saw you—covered in flour.”
“I am in my element,” (Y/N) said sweetly, “just as you would expect.” She had noticed that Marie and her husband were not in the café, the sign flipped to close. “You planned this.”
“Do you insinuate that I bribed my distant cousin to close her café to give you the day off, travel all the way to France, hoping I could spend the day with you?” Benedict scoffed playfully. “You truly do not know me at all.”
“I do not think Marie would take a bribe,” (Y/N) said slyly, knowing how much of a champion the cousin had been for the baker and viscount’s son to get together.
“She refused payment,” he admitted, agreeing with her notion. “But, was ever eager to see you get out of the kitchen and enjoy yourself.”
“You hadn’t written to me in two weeks,” (Y/N) said, walking around the counter. “I was worried.”
“I needed to refrain from our correspondence, I fear I would have let the surprise slip otherwise.”
“Smart man,” she hummed.
“I am known to be smart occasionally,” he shrugged.
“What are you doing here?” She finally asked. “N-not that I am not happy to see you, of course, but as you had said, this is a surprise.”
“I came to study art,” Benedict said, a hand in his coat pocket. “I felt that if I truly wanted to learn the craft, I needed to learn from the masters—many of their works are housed here in France. I even began to rent a little home in town, finding the need to stay a while.”
“That is the only reason?”
Benedict’s gaze softened. “Of course it is not the only reason.”
Her heart fluttered again.
“It is only fair that I try this again, correctly and without the prying eyes of society, this time,” Benedict said, clearing his throat and spinning around.
“Correctly?” She giggled, watching him twirl to face the door.
“Ah, good morning miss!” Benedict said, turning back to face (Y/N). “I must say, you look ever-so-pretty—tell me, do all bakers have a beauty such as your own?”
“I would wager no,” she said, trying to keep serious. “Most of the bakers around here are men.”
“Shame. Might I learn your name? It seems only fair—I fear I might just die if I do not know the sweet sound of it.”
“(Y/N),” she sang. “My name is (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”
“Benedict Bridgerton,” he stretched out his hand, reaching for her own. She allowed him to take it, a soft kiss was placed on the back of her cracked hand—a working hand, one that she was proud to have. 
“You are very charming, Mr. Bridgerton,” she hummed, looking deeply into his blue eyes. “Pleased to make your company.”
“I assure you, I am more pleased to be in yours,” Benedict insisted, kissing her hand again. “Tell me, do you have plans this afternoon?”
“It seems my schedule has cleared up,” she looked to the sign on the door and sighed. “Why? Do you have any suggestions on how I should spend it?”
“Might we take a turn around the park? A friend of mine has written to me about just how lovely one nearby is, I reckon I would like to see it for myself.”
She smiled brightly at him, as if he held the world in his hands. Instead, he held two leaves between his fingers—brown and cracked, but clearly treated with such care. They had been the same ones from their time at the park the first go around, she was nearly certain. Why else would he bring dead leaves with him?
"Leaves?"
"You see, my family, we have this tradition of racing with leaves—I would very much like to share it with you. These two in particular seem to be very lucky, thought it would be best to bring them along."
His smile melted her heart, endearing and thoughtful in the same breath. She could get used to a smile like that.
“Well… what are we waiting for, Mr. Bridgerton?”
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lina-lovebug · 1 month
Text
Pretty Boy
Warnings!!: oral - both fem and male receiving, fingering, teasing, praise
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Kurt Wagner was a saint.
He prayed daily for his own sins. He didn’t believe in telling someone he would be praying for them because he had no business in their privacy. To be honest, Kurt didn’t much like to hear the shameless and endless berating against those who did not follow the book of God.
Kurt Wagner took a vow.
He took a vow of celibacy, believing himself to be restrained and would wait until he was wed to give himself to whom he loved. But if he’s being honest with himself, he took such a vow because he never thought he’d get married. 
“Look at me,” he’d say, “who would want to devote their life to someone who looks like me?”
You did.
You called Kurt Wagner “the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen”, and from then on, he knew he was fucked.
You showed up like the sun, shining and unexpectedly beautiful. So stunning that Kurt never thought you’d look twice at him.
Let alone be underneath him.
Kurt wanted to do you justice. He pressed his lips against yours with desperation, like a dehydrated man having his first drink of water. It was sloppy at first, because all he wanted to do was touch you. His hands carved out each curve of your skin, memorizing it in his mind like a beautiful painting.
His tail trailed up your dress, which you wore specifically for him. It was his shade of blue, and allowed him a glimpse at your lace underwear when you bent over. You had been teasing the poor boy all day with subtle touches and even trailing his own hand up your dress, teasing your inner thigh underneath the dinner table.
“Kurt. . .” you pleaded, begging for him to touch you. But you made it quite difficult for him today, seeing as he had a raging hard on at dinner and couldn’t get up.
He’d make you beg for it.
“Hmm?” He hummed teasingly against your skin, tracking hot kisses down your neck.
“Kurt, touch me.”
His tail laced itself around your underwear, tugging it down your leg with such slowness that you knew he was doing it on purpose.
“I need you,” your voice was breathless as he brushed his canines against your pulse point.
“Need what, mein schatz? Use your words,” he encouraged softly, gently biting down on your neck whilst grinding his hard on against your sopping wet core.
“Your finger. Please,” his three fingers weren’t normal or human sized, but thicker.
Thick enough to make you wonder how good it could make you feel.
With your underwear at your ankles, his hand began to venture downwards whilst continuing to mark you with his mouth. He had made several impressions upon your neck already, but craved more. He wanted your entire body to be decorated in hickies because they’d remind him that you chose him.
He hissed quietly as he felt you, “Bei Gott, (Y/N). . .all this for me, my love?” You were soaking wet and he dipped a finger inside. You lulled your head back gently, savoring the feeling of his thick and long finger.
Never in a million years did you think Kurt would be such a tease.
He went achingly slow, savoring your walls around his singular digit as it slid in and out with ease. But he knew he wouldn’t last much longer.
Which was where his predicament lied.
He didn’t want to break his vow to God. 
So, he’d compromise.
By making you cum in every other way possible.
But god damn, did he want to press his cock inside of you and watch as you two became one.
“Faster, Kurt,” you gasped, and he did as you wished. Working his slender finger into you, seeking out your g-spot whilst his other finger began to gently circle your clit. Your eyes widened gently, hips bucking upwards involuntarily and earning a deep chuckle from Kurt.
“Look at you,” he whispered in awe, “so pretty.”
You mewled at his words, and Kurt watched your pretty pussy before taking his thumb off of your clit. And replaced it with his tongue.
“Kurt!” You gasped unexpectedly, one hand coming down to tangle in his hair. He smirked against you, his tongue tracing circles around your clit before gently taking it into his mouth. You further clenched around his finger, getting closer to that sweet release. 
“Taste so sweet, liebling,” he practically moaned against your clit, sucking on it gently whilst working his finger further inside of you. 
“Oh fuck,” you cursed, thighs encapsulating his head but he fucking loved it. Your plush thighs around his head, legs quivering with the need for an orgasm made him harder.
If that was even possible.
“So close,” he purred, “cum. Cum on my finger. Let me taste you.”
With a few more pushes and his sweet tongue, you released with a weak cry. He still worked his finger inside of you, drawing out your orgasm and leaving you panting against the bed. He pulled his finger out slowly, licking it in view of your eyes.
That’s when you saw it.
He was straining against his pants, pre-cum soaking the front.
“Kurt,” you whimpered softly, sitting forward. He looked down at you, confused momentarily.
“Are you alri-agh!”
He was extremely sensitive. Once your hand gently wrapped around his cock through his sweats, his eyes shut and his hand wrapped around your wrist as a low moan released.
“You-you don’t have to,” he said. He didn’t care if he had to go jack off later. Well, he did but he knew his vows. 
“But I want to,” you pressed, “you made me feel so good. Let me make you cum, baby.”
He was putty in your hands at that point. That small plea paired with your begging eyes led him to sitting on the bed whilst you got on your knees, and he swore this sight was better than the Heavens itself.
His cock sprang free, gently hitting his stomach and he watched as you looked at it. He felt nervous, wondering if maybe you thought it-
A startled moan left his mouth as you dragged your tongue along his shaft. His hands gripped the sheets below him, his citrine eyes staring down at you. 
You further pressed on, your lips around his tip and you soon realized just how much he needed this. How much he deserved this. You slowly bob your head, taking him in inch at a time. Your warm mouth alone made him feel like he was already close.
“Zu gut,” he whimpered softly. You pulled back momentarily, deciding to tease him.
“What was that? Use your words, baby."
A strangled moan escaped him as you fully took his cock into your mouth. His hands gripped the sheets tighter, refusing to lay a hand on your pretty head. He didn’t want to make you gag or choke on accident, but he was using every ounce of self restraint.
“Just-just like that, (Y/N),” he was embarrassed but you savoured those precious little sounds coming from him. They were whimpers and soft moans, which encouraged you to deep throat him.
His tail flicked wildly on the bed, twitching every so often when you took him deep.
His eyes rolled back gently, but he didn’t want them to. He wanted to look at your pretty face, your eyes as you graciously took care of him.
“Close, baby?” You questioned, pulling away momentarily. He nodded eagerly, and you laced your hand with his. You licked his tip before taking him back into your mouth, and his hips bucked forward. You gagged slightly at the sudden jump, but it only made you want him more because he was enjoying this so much.
He felt it building, and fast. 
“So nah dran. . .” he gasped, his German sounding babbled, “I-I’m close.”
His hand clenched around yours, squeezing as his tail twitched wildly. You felt him cumming quickly, and kept him inside your mouth. He came soon with a weak cry of your name, panting slightly as his cum filled your mouth.
You swallowed, not complaining because his sounds and facial expressions were enough.
“Thank you, mein schatz,” he breathed out, his eyes practically glowing as he wiped your hair from your face.
“I’d do it everyday if it means you keep making pretty sounds,” you responded, earning a purple hue on his cheeks.
But he didn’t oppose.
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number1mingyustan · 10 months
Text
Today, Tomorrow, and Forever ☾ ♡
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husband!seungchol x fem!reader, newlyweds au
Warnings: cursing, explicit smut, unprotected sex (missionary), soft sex, oral (f.), multiple orgasms, body worship, creampie, soft!dom cheol, they are so in love
Summary: You mean everything to him and more
Word Count: 2.3k
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(a/n: school started again and i’ve been so inactive i’m sorry y’all 💔)
You feel like a teenager again. The two of you are giggly and stumbling all over yourselves, drunk off of your love and the little bit of champagne you shared earlier.
Seungchol pushes the elevator button once for the sixth floor, and when it doesn’t immediately light up he starts aggressively pressing it over and over again. You giggle, placing your hand on top of his.
“Calm down baby… there’s no need to rush,” You grin.
“I finally got you all to myself… don’t wanna waste another moment.” He says.
The elevator door is about to close and Seungchol is already plotting all the things he’s gonna do to you when you get upstairs. Matter of fact, what he’s planning to do to you right here in the elevator even.
But before he can act on any of his desires, a hand stops the elevator from closing and a woman steps inside. She’s a little breathless, making it obvious she was in a bit of a rush to get here.
Seungchol has to hold himself back from groaning out loud. He finally got a moment alone with you and it’s been ruined again.
You nudge him when you notice the way he’s blatantly rolling his eyes.
“Thank you, I thought I wasn’t going to make it,” The woman says as she fully steps into the elevator.
“Mhm. What floor?” Seungchol asks with the least bit of interest in his voice.
You nudge him again and he sighs.
“The fifth please,” the woman says with a smile. “And might I just say…. you are gorgeous. Congratulations to the two of you I’m assuming.”
She takes notice of your attire.
Seungchol is holding the bottom of your white dress with the utmost care so it doesn’t drag.
It’s your wedding day, well wedding night really now. It’s the whole reason Seungchol has been so antsy and handsy.
As much as he loves all your family and friends, the reception was meant to be over hours ago. He didn’t want it to end, considering it was still your special day, but he wanted some alone time with his beautiful wife.
Conversation started to get exhausting, hearing the constant congratulations and saying ‘thank you’ and smiling for hours on end.
He truly couldn’t have been happier, but he wanted to spend some time with his beautiful wife.
Nonetheless, today was the best day of your entire life. You can’t help but look down at the gorgeous ring decorating your finger.
“Oh! Thank you,” you smile. “Yeah… it’s our big day.”
“I wish the two of you the best.” She smiles.
“Thank you,” Seunchol smiles. “We appreciate it.”
She gives another genuine smile. “I know you probably know this, but marriage isn’t easy by any means. But just know that no matter what happens, she’s always right.” The woman jokes.
Seungchol chuckles and looks at you with a genuine look in his eyes. “I didn’t have to marry her to know that.”
The woman laughs and the elevator sings when it reaches the fifth floor. “Well this is my stop. It was nice meeting you too and I wish you the best.”
“Thank you,” you smile.
She steps out and waves before the doors shut again.
“She was sweet,” You comment.
“Mhm,” He pulls your body closer to his protectively. “But now it’s just you and me for the rest of the night.”
He starts leaving kisses along your neck. But before it can escalate, the elevator reaches the sixth floor and the door opens in front of you.
He holds the key in his pocket and begins pulling you out the elevator and toward your room for the night. He doesn’t let your dress touch the ground, even as he scrambles for the key and opens the door.
When he does, your eyes go wide at the sight before you.
The hotel room is incredible. It’s spacious and the bed is huge, decorated with rose petals and a bottle of champagne. The pillows are heart shaped and there are balloons touching the ceiling.
“Do you like it?” Seungchol asks.
You turn back at him with glossy eyes. “I love it. I can’t believe you did all this.”
“You put so much into planning the wedding… I figured I could do a little special something for you.”
You’re quick you wrap your arms around him. He nearly drops the train of your dress with how much force you use to embrace him. He holds you in his arms, rubbing your back lightly.
“I know I’ve said it a million times… but you look so beautiful.”
The love in his eyes is pure and genuine. There’s a slight glimmer every time he stares at you and he couldn’t hide it even if he wanted to.
You don't hesitate to place your lips on his. It's a sweet kiss but it escalates quickly. He holds you by the waist gently as he kisses you back. Your lips mold together perfectly as he holds you close to him.
The kiss grows passionate quickly, and he's soon lifting you up and placing you on the large bed gently. He kneels down in front of you and helps you to take off your heels. He rubs your feet soothingly, allowing his head to disappear under your dress momentarily to leave loving kisses along your legs.
He places your shoes upright on the floor before standing to his feet and leaning over to capture your lips in another kiss. Your hands undo the buttons of his tux and the white button up he has on underneath.
He stands shirtless in front of you with a grin plastered on his face. "You're so beautiful," he mumbles. He plants a kiss on your shoulder before his hands find their way to the zipper on the back of your dress. He slides it down with care and helps you step out of the dress.
He takes your wedding dress and hangs it up before returning to you on the bed. He pushes a loose strand of hair behind your ear softly. "Can I take this down?" he asks.
You look up at him with soft eyes and nod.
Carefully, he takes out all the pins holding up your hair and allows it to fall down onto your shoulders. His hand cups your cheek and he kisses you again.
He crawls on top of you without breaking the kiss. He plants his body between your thighs and runs his fingers along your exposed skin.
"Wait! I bought a new set just for tonight!" You break the kiss and sit up on the bed quickly.
He pushes you back down onto the bed gently. "Baby don't worry about it. Save it for this weekend when we go on honeymoon. Don't wanna waste another minute."
Singlehandedly, he removes his belt and tosses it onto the floor before doing the same with his pants. He begins kissing down your neck, trailing down to your collarbone and the curve of your breasts. His hand undoes the back of your bra before he tosses it and continues trailing down your body with kisses.
"Cheol..." you whine when his puckered lips reach the hem of your panties.
"Don't tell me you're being impatient now... you were ready to do an outfit change a few minutes ago," he chuckles.
"That's only because I suddenly remembered. It's what most couples do on their wedding night, no?"
He grins. "When have we ever been like most couples?" He slides your panties down and tosses them before he spreads your legs and dips his head between your thighs.
He doesn't warn you before attaching his lips to your clit and sucking on the sensitive bud. You hiss and arch your back off the bed at the sudden jolt of pleasure pulsing through your body. Your hands fly to his hair, gripping his strands tightly.
He licks a stripe between your folds before reattaching his lips to your clit and sucking. You squirm beneath him, but he doesn't mind. It actually boosts his ego, knowing he can make you squirm so much and so quickly.
"Shit," you breathe out as you tug at his hair.
He grins when he feels your arousal starting to coat his face. He's determined to make his new wife feel good and he's relentless in his movements. His tongue is everywhere, darting inside of you and latching along your clit.
You're still writhing beneath him, struggling as he pleasures you to the max.
Your husband has always been a giver.
"Cheol-ah! I'm close," you warn him.
You can feel him grin against your skin. He wraps his arms around you thighs and pins your body down. His tongue is moving quickly, heart set on making you cum on his tongue.
You're whining above him, unable to stay still even as he holds you in place. He can't help but go faster, nose nudging against your clit as his tongue laps your folds, moaning against your skin and sending vibrations coursing through your sensitive body. He's bringing you closer to the euphoric feeling he's wanted to give you since the words "I do" slipped out of your mouth earlier today.
Your back is arching off the bed when you cum and your hands press his head down against your cunt. You're grinding against his face, hips pushing against him and nearly suffocating him.
Not that he minds. If he ever were to die, he could only hope it was between your thighs like this.
Your body is completely overcome with pleasure. He doesn't stop, simply tilting his head up to watch the way your body trembles and how your chest rises and falls quickly as you come back into your senses.
He crawls back up on top of you, pushing your messy hair out of your face. His face is just a few inches away from yours, you can still the the glisten on his lips from your arousal.
"You're always so good at that.... I don't know how I got so lucky," you breathe out.
He grins. "I'm the lucky one baby."
"Cheol... want you inside of me," you look up a him with lust in your eyes, nudging your nose against his.
He's quick to pull his underwear off and toss them onto the floor. The two of you are tangled beneath the sheets in a matter of seconds. His body hovers over yours once again. He strokes his length slowly, eyes admiring and scanning over your body.
He tip teases your folds before he pushes in to fulfill your needs. He tried going in slow, but you were so wet that his length slipped all the way into you. You both breathe out at the sudden feeling.
Your walls are hot and wet and sucking him in. He holds himself up on his hands with his mouth hanging agape. It feels like your first time with him all over again.
It may be your first time together as husband and wife, but it feels foreign despite the many times you've done this. The intimacy is on an entirely new level. There is so much love and adoration radiating from both your bodies, it makes your heart feel full.
"Good?" he asks.
You nod. "Yeah."
He kisses your cheek before allowing his head to fall into the crook of your neck. He draws his hips back before thrusting back into you. His thrusts re slow, but deep. He pushes into you with full force, filling your cunt every time he moves.
He's in no rush, he simply wants to make you feel good. You feel hims groaning and moaning against your collarbone each time he bottoms out.
Your wrap your legs around his torso, pulling him closer and forcing his length deeper inside of you. Your head sinks into the pillow and your eyes fall shut.
"Ah-shit," you breathe out.
The bed shifts beneath you every time he fills you up. "Feel so good Angel," he coos. "My pretty wife."
You can only moan out in response. It feels so fucking good.
"You're taking me so well baby... really were made for me," he moans.
He begins sucking on your neck, leaving dark hickies along your skin. You really are his, his everything. His wife, wearing his ring while marked up with his love bites.
He never thought he'd see this day. He's been thinking about it since the day he met you and now he can't believe you're really his for the rest of eternity.
His love for you is pure and unlike anything you've ever experienced before. He understands you and is willing to do anything to ensure your happiness.
"I'm cumming... fuck," you warn him.
He groans against your skin, indicating that is orgasm is approaching too. He thrusts deep inside of you a few more times before you both fall apart. You cum at the same time, moaning out in unison as he fills you up and you experience another euphoric high.
He pulls out, licking his lips as he sees his cum drip out of you, mixing with your own arousal. He rolls onto the bed next to you, laying on his side so he can still look at you. His fingers move your hair out of your face again, this time playing with the strands gently.
"I love you so much," he says.
You breathe heavily. "I love you more."
"Impossible," he says before placing a sweet kiss on your lips.
He pulls you closer to him, not caring how sweaty you are or how messy your hair is now. He holds you in his arms, fingers tracing over your skin lovingly.
He'll clean you up later, for sure. But right now, he just wants to lay in bed and hold his pretty wife for a little bit longer.
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© number1mingyustan - Do not repost without permission.
2K notes · View notes
celaenaeiln · 3 months
Note
in like a one person gets one, who would dicks soulmate (platonic or not idk) be? i’ve asked this to several ppl and the answers are usually wally, donna, or jason though i’ve seen some ppl say slade, roy, and bruce.
Anon your ask has literally been haunting me at night. I thought I knew the answer but then you hit me with a Donna!! But between Bruce and Donna, I can't decide so I'll just present a case for both.
Bruce
Bruce and Dick are soulmates on a cosmological scale. The DC universe ordained them to always find each other because they're quite literally a fated pair.
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Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight Issue #23
Bruce: The only regret is that I'm out there alone. It felt good having someone at my back, being part of a team...but no sense wasting time wishing for something I'll never have.
Dick: He's cool, dad...d'you think we'll ever see him when we play Gotham?
The universe literally brings them together no matter the circumstances.
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Convergence Issue #4
"The bond between you and Bruce Wayne echoes in every reality."
I don't think there's any stronger evidence for Dick and Bruce being soulmates than this.
But if that's still not enough I have more-
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The Multiversity: Guidebook
In Bruce's world he lost Dick and in Dick's world he lost Bruce, but still in the end they somehow find each other. In every universe that has Batman, if someone is his partner it's always Dick.
In the medieval ages world-
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Batman: Dark Knight of the Round Table Issue #1
The world of "A Christmas Carol" with Ebenezer Scrooge -
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Batman: Noël
In a world where Bruce is a doctor at Arkham -
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The Batman of Arkham
Dick is always there as his second.
Here's another interesting but depressing fact: In worlds where Dick Grayson has died as Robin, Bruce Wayne has never taken in another Robin.
This is because on top of the fact that Dick and Bruce as fated to meet, Dick means the entire world for Bruce. Like sometimes Bruce will come across a case with a child involved and the first thing he'll think about is Dick.
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Batman: City of Madness Issue #2
Bruce's mind and life is literally consumed by Dick Grayson on a cosmologically spiritual level.
Donna
Donna is Dick's soulmate on a twin-sister spiritual level. Dick and Bruce are two halves of a whole, yin and yang. Dick and Donna though are one person. Their relationship is like taking paint and mixing it together to get something new. Like in those comics where two people look at each other and there's a "zing!" and suddenly it's an instant connection. That's them.
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Titans (2016) Special 1
additionally:
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Titans (2016) Special 1
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New Titans (1988) Issue #89
Dick and Donna have no secrets. They're like a jigsaw puzzle, their pieces fall right into place.
He's always there for her-
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The New Teen Titans (1980) Issue #38
They're so special and integral to each other that when an evil witch erases Donna from everyone's memories, there is only one focal point for her. One focal person for her throughout the years. Even though he doesn't remember her, Dick literally goes back in time with his future daughter Mar'i to help Donna, his soul-sister-
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The Titans (1999) Issue #25
In every. single. moment of Donna's past Dick appears again and again to comfort her and be her pillar from Robin to civies to Nightwing. In the "Who is Donna Troy" Arc, as the story goes from the origins of Donna to the present, it becomes very clear that Dick is her centerpoint.
They're the definition of soulmates.
She knows him better than anyone else and he knows her. She even had him walk her Donna the aisle for her wedding. He was given that honor because of who they are to each other.
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Tales of the Teen Titans Issue #42
I...
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just-
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Tales of the Teen Titans Issue #50
to love like that...
They're made for each other.
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munson-blurbs · 5 months
Note
Tui request?? Eddie gains a little weight after the baby is born and Ms heart looks amazing post baby and Eddie becomes sort of self conscious and Mrs sweet heart shows Eddie how much she loves his dad bod
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Single Dad!Eddie x Fem!ReaderSeries
Summary: When Eddie starts feeling insecure about his newfound dad bod, you make sure to prove how sexy you think he is.
Warnings: smut (18+ only, minors DNI), oral (m! receiving), p in v, breeding kink, Reader breastfeeds (no lactation kink), mention of weight gain and a "junk food diet"
WC: 1.7k
A/N: Thank you to @jo-harrington for helping me with the pacing and to @corroded-hellfire for help with the dialogue!
Eddie Munson thought you were stunning the night you met at the Hideout. On your wedding day, he surmised that he was marrying the prettiest woman in the world. And when you got pregnant with Hendrix—especially once your bump became more prominent—he’d sworn up and down that you couldn’t possibly get more beautiful if you tried. 
That statement, of course, is easily refuted by his current sight of you with six-month-old Hendrix nestled into your chest. You gently move the rocking chair back and forth as the baby drinks from your breast, your shirt hiked up so he can easily latch onto your nipple. You wince slightly as he suckles, though it isn’t nearly as painful as when you’d first begun nursing him. 
“He’s getting so chunky,” you muse, running your finger over the roll that’s formed on his little wrist. You look at your husband to gauge his reaction, your smile fading when you see his distant expression. “Hey, what’s going on?”
“Nothing.” It’s a blatant lie, and you both know it. 
You sigh, carefully adjusting your position to sit forward a bit. Hendrix is unfazed, too focused on his lunch. “Tell me the truth. You know I always find out, anyway.”
“You’re right,” Eddie agrees with a small laugh. There’s no sense in trying to hide it, not when you can read him like a book. “Guess, um, guess I’ve just been noticing that Hendrix isn’t the only one putting on weight lately.” He looks down at his stomach guiltily.
A delicate frown tugs your lips downward; you notice for the first time that he’s wearing a jacket despite the warm May weather. “So? You’re adjusting to being a father of two. Instead of both of us taking care of only Harris, we now need man-to-man coverage.”
“Yeah, but you’re fuckin’ gorgeous,” he protests. Your pregnancy glow has carried over to a new-mom glow, despite the exhaustion. Christ, you even make sleep deprivation look good. “And you’re the one who had the baby.”
“Eds,” you say softly, the weight of his statement heavy on your shoulders, “you spent my entire pregnancy and this post-partum hell reassuring me that you loved every version of my body. Why wouldn’t I feel the same way about yours?” Hendrix has stopped eating, so you fix your shirt and prop him up to burp him.
He shrugs, cheek pinched between his teeth to stifle emotion. “I dunno, I just…” he exhales long and loud as he searches for the right phrasing. “Your body made life; mine made the decision to eat chicken nuggets and mac ‘n cheese off of Harris’s plate instead of vegetables.”
You offer a hint of a smile at his humor, though his words are laced with true insecurity. “Let me put this little man down for his nap and show you just how incredible that body of yours is.” There’s a mischievous glint in your eyes when you stand, the baby satiated and ready for his midday sleep. Harris is at Charlie’s house for a playdate, which means you and Eddie essentially have the afternoon to yourselves.
Hendrix’s milk-drunk state has him falling asleep quickly, and you take Eddie’s hand and lead him to the bedroom. As soon as the door shuts, your arms are draped over his shoulders, and you press your torso to his. You give his earlobe a little nibble before bringing your lips to his neck.
“You know what I see when I look at you?” you start, letting your hands rest on his biceps. “I see the arms that carry our boys to bed every night.” You leave a delicate kiss on the spot you just mentioned before gently pulling off his shirt. “And your chest is perfect for any of us to rest on.” Another kiss, this one received with a shiver. 
He shakes his head. “‘S not how I used to look,” he responds guiltily. “When I was younger, I lived off of Doritos and Mountain Dew–didn’t gain an ounce. Guess it’s catching up to me now,” he grimaces, giving his belly a little pinch.
You intercept the motion, gently pushing his hands from his stomach. “Did I know I love this tummy most of all?” When he cocks a disbelieving brow, you smile and elaborate. “It reminds me that you don’t have to settle for a junk food diet anymore. We’ve created a little home with safety, love, and delicious food. I mean, you could do some sit-ups, I guess, but…” you shrug, scrunching your nose as you say the words, “I kinda like having a little something extra to hold onto.”
“Really?” He still doesn’t allow himself to fully accept this truth, so you try another method.
“Really,” you affirm, pulling him in for another deep kiss. “I need you,” you growl, your core already flooded with need at the prospect of worshiping him. “Need you so bad.” 
Eddie moans under his breath when you suck a bruise just above his collarbone. His hands grip your hips to tug you even closer, and you can feel him stiffen in his jeans. With a knowing grin, you drop to your knees and leave a hickey right next to his navel. 
“You are,” you mumble against his skin, fingers coaxing open his pants button, “ridiculously sexy. ‘S not fair.” You unzip him, pulling down his jeans and boxers in one swift motion. His erection stands at attention, and you intend to show him plenty of it; but you have one last item on your agenda. “Eds, this ass? God, I could bite it all day.” You giggle as you lean around to sink your teeth into the meat of it, and he yelps in surprise. “Only want you, Eddie,” you say, now looking up into his eyes. “Only ever wanna make you feel good.” 
“Oh, fuck,” Eddie groans, throwing his head back as you flatten your tongue and lick the underside of his shaft. “Thassit; take your time, Sweetheart.”
You take the tip between your lips, swiping at the pre-cum already dripping from it. Slowly, you allow more and more of him in your mouth until your nose brushes his pubic hair. 
“Mhm. Kee-Keep going, mmf, little faster now.” 
You eagerly oblige, swirling your tongue in that way that drives him wild; sure enough, you feel his thigh twitch next to your cheek. You assumed he would finish in your mouth, and you look up at him in confusion when he pulls out of it. 
“I gotta…fuck…gotta be inside that tight pussy of yours.” He grabs himself at the base, eyes begging for you to let him in. 
You shed your clothes and toss them in a heap on the floor, walking towards him and pushing him onto the bed. He grins when you straddle his waist and kiss his lips hungrily. 
“Gonna take care of you tonight, Eds,” you coo, grinding your wet center over the ridges of his cock. “You always make me feel amazing, honey. I wanna return the favor.”
Eddie nods, adjusting his hard-on so you can sink onto it, enveloping him in your warmth. He stretches you perfectly, and you let him know with a pleased moan. 
“Oh, fuck,” he hisses, nails digging into the flesh of your ass. “I’ll never get tired of that feeling.”
“Good,” you smirk, letting him bottom out before you begin moving again. His grip stabilizes you enough to ride him, rolling your hips teasingly. Your lips are beckoned by his chest tattoo, and you plant kisses all over it. “Mine.” You claim him with that one word, and he gives himself to you fully.
You sit back up to bounce on him, his hands reaching for your breasts and gently cupping them. A whine emanates from your throat as he thrusts up into you with more rigor.
“Kiss me?” he pleads, lifting one hand to clasp around the back of your head, bringing your face closer to his. There’s no need to ask twice; you lean in and kiss him passionately, 
As much as you want to take the lead, you can’t deny how incredible it feels when he thrusts upwards. You whine pathetically as he drives his cock deeper within you. 
“Take it so well, Sweetheart,” he grunts, pinning down your thighs. “Got me tempted to knock you up all over again.”
His words have you clenching around him, your breaths shallow. You brace yourself on his chest, moaning out his name. 
“Eddie, your body,” you whimper, unable to complete the sentence. Your mind is too focused on your building orgasm. 
“What about it, honey?”
You take as much of a breath as you can. “Your body makes me feel so fucking good.”
“Prove it,” he growls. “Cum for me. Cum all over my cock.”
Pleasure washes over you, his length brushing against your sweet spot and driving you over the edge. “I-I’m cumming—”
“Mmf, m-me, too—fuck!” Eddie’s eyes roll as he finishes, pumping you full of his release. He pounds into you, draining himself completely. 
You lay on top of him until he whispers in your ear, “Sweetheart? I gotta pull out.” Sure enough, he’s gone completely soft, absolutely spent. 
All you can manage is an mmh, pouting when he withdraws. Eddie laughs kindly and kisses you, one hand cupping your cheek. 
“Have I ever told you that you’re the best wife in the world?” he asks, nose gently nudging yours. “Not just because of all that—which was phenomenal, by the way. Five stars.” You swat at him and he laughs harder. “I feel so…safe when I’m with you.”
Your lips ghost the tip of his nose. “You are safe with me,” you remind him. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” he says, holding you as close as he can. He pauses for a beat before speaking again. “Can I ask you something?”
“‘Course.”
Eddie clears his throat. “That thing about liking when there’s something to, um, ‘hold onto,’” he starts, cheeks filling in pink, “did you mean that?”
It’s your turn to kiss him passionately, lips parted, tongue grazing his. You roll your hips again, fingertips brushing the soft side of his torso. It reignites the fire within him; his cock twitches slightly. 
“Does that answer your question?”
--
916 notes · View notes
queuestarter · 5 months
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(finnick odair x reader)
cw: none
link to the request → finnick and reader get pregnant and have a shotgun wedding
open to finnick requests !!
“Wake up.”
You straddle Finnick’s hips as he sleeps, slapping at his chest to get him to wake up even sooner. He scrunches his nose at the gentle slaps, so you resort to the next best thing.
“Finnick,” you drawl, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him firmly. “Wake the hell up.”
His eyes slowly open, a smile growing on his face when he sees you on top of him. “Well, hello. Good morning to me.”
You roll your eyes but you can’t find it in yourself to get annoyed with him. “I have good news. Do you want to keep being annoying or do you want to hear it?”
Finnick flips you both over so that now he’s laying on top of you. He wraps his arms around your shoulders and nuzzles his face into your neck. “I’m up for some good news.”
“Sure seems like it.”
“I am!” He insists. 
“I guess I’ll just say it then. We’re having a baby. I’m pregnant.” A smile immediately breaks out across your face. You haven’t said the words out loud yet, so just acknowledging it is making you ecstatic.
Finnick pulls away from where he was kissing your skin quickly. “What? Are you serious?” His eyes frantically search yours. When you nod, he sits up fully and starts punching the air.
“What are you doing,” you giggle, hand covering your mouth. “What kind of reaction is that?”
“Yes! Yes, yes, yes!” He continues to punch the air before launching himself at you. “I did that. That’s my baby in there.” He kisses your lips twice before moving down to your stomach, which is currently covered by one of his shirts. He lifts up the fabric before speaking to your belly. “Hello, baby. It’s me, your daddy. You don’t know it yet, but this is the best moment of my life.”
You bury your face in your hands. “You’re so embarrassing.”
“Let’s get married,” Finnick says suddenly, pulling away from your skin. “Right now.”
You pull your hands away from your eyes and look at your boyfriend. His smile is so bright and his entire being is just radiating warmth. Without much thought, you nod enthusiastically. “Yeah. Yes, let’s do it.”
Finnick’s smile only grows wider, which you didn’t think was possible. “Right now?” 
“Yes!” You insist, getting up off the bed. “Go get dressed.”
You pick out a little white sundress that’s been sitting in the back of your closet for years. You grab some sandals and pull your hair back into a low bun. Finnick chooses a flowy white top and a nice pair of pants.
You two leave your house hand in hand and make your way to the beach. Finnick carries a woven net and you carry a small bowl that will be filled with sea water.
The two of you stand on the shoreline, quietly whispering the words of your district’s wedding song to one another, each verse broken up by small giggles and wandering hands. Finnick drapes the net over your heads and you brush each of your lips with the ocean water.
When the two of you kiss, it’s salty and short, but you decide that it’s the best kiss of your life. There’s no one there to witness you and Finnick’s matrimony, but neither of you care.
“This is everything I’ve ever wanted,” Finnick says, still under the protection of the net. “You’re everything.”
Your eyes well up. “I love you, Finn. You and this baby and this life we’ve built together.”
You two kiss once more before walking home.
-
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littlejuicebox · 6 months
Note
Hi! I'm not sure if you take requests so if you don't, please ignore this and I hope you had a wonderful Christmas.
I just read your Astarion X Tav fanfic where Astarion proposes. It is said that the ring he got glows whenever Astarion thinks of Tav. I was just wondering if you could write a slice of life about the ring glowing at the most random times. Maybe during a stealth mission where Tav has to stay hidden or when he is smiling in his sleep and the ring glows. I just thought it would be cute and fun to write about. You can get creative with it.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, whether you end up doing this request or not. I hope you had an amazing Christmas and I hope you will have an amazing New Year's!
Hi Anon! I don’t think this is quite what you were asking for but… this is what came out! 🤷‍♀️ The smut gods blessed me and I cannot deny their gifts. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! Smut below the cut.
If you haven’t read my other work and would like context, Anon is referencing a two part mini story I wrote. Click here for part 1, and click here for part 2.
Warnings/Tags: 18+ only please, smut, masturbation, sex pollen, swearing/cursing, game spoilers
Word Count: 1.5K
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“I think we’re just… a bit out of practice, darling. It has been nearly a year since we were down here last, you know.” Astarion whispers, crouched next to you behind a Funguswood tree. He’s wiping bits of dirt, twigs, and mushroom pollen off himself with a handkerchief.
“Admit it, Astarion. You just weren’t fast enough.” You respond with a small, teasing poke of your tongue as you rearrange your weaponry and count your arrows.
The pale elf finishes wiping off the debris, and you return your attentions to the mission. You’d been contracted to scout out the vampire stronghold in the Underdark and report your findings back to Wyll and the Flaming Fists. Rumor was that the vampire hoard had wreaked absolute havoc on the Underdark; the city feared the creatures would soon return to the surface if they could not find sustenance here.
“Would you have preferred I let that wild Rothé ram you into those mushrooms in my stead?!” Astarion hisses in return while rubbing his hand over his arm, which now felt unbelievably tingly and was starting to radiate significant warmth, “Hells, what mushrooms were those, anyway?!”
You stifle a chuckle, knowing your fiancé is already past his limits of patience. You two need to get to the scouting point, set up camp, and hunker down for a few days… all while avoiding detection from the vampires or any other nefarious creatures in the Underdark. Best to do it without an ornery Astarion by your side.
“I don’t know what mushrooms those were. I’ve never seen them before.” You admit with a small shrug, “Come on my love, not much further now and then we can get you properly cleaned up.”
Astarion follows behind you in silence, apart from the occasional cursing and swiping at his skin. Gods, the heat had spread up his entire arm now. The scratching seemed to make it worse, but by the hells, he couldn’t stop no matter how much he wanted to. The two of you finally got to the cragged rock that led to a small cave where you would make camp, and he never felt more relieved in his life. He couldn’t wait to clean himself properly and be done with this burning sensation.
You glance at him briefly and then begin climbing the rock. Astarion remains below to keep you covered in case anything decides to attack while you’re left defenseless. He looks up to watch your progress and cannot help but to notice the overwhelmingly attractive curve of your bottom. It was always attractive, of course, but something about it in this moment was entirely… irresistible. Had you been working out recently in preparation for the wedding?
You’re halfway through climbing the rock when your engagement ring bursts into a spray of light. It often glows significantly at the surface, but in the blackness of the Underdark, you’re practically a beacon. Your stomach drops. Gods, how had you forgotten to take it off?
“Astarion!” You hiss in a panicked whisper, “Cut it out! Every being in all of the Underdark will know our position.”
Astarion had realized the issue as soon as the light had flared, of course. He was trying desperately to avoid thinking of you and all the delicious things he wanted to do when you two made camp, but gods he couldn’t control it. What in the hells was wrong with him? He wanted to stop, to ensure your safety, but your plump, perfect ass was practically calling his name, begging for his attention, and he wanted nothing more than to bend you over and—
He shakes his head, trying to rattle the lewd fantasies from his psyche, “I’m trying, my love! I don’t know what’s come over me I just—“
Hags. Hideous shoes. Ghouls. Manual labor. Gale.
The pale elf tries to think of all the most grotesque, unsexy things he can and push you entirely from his mind. You continue to climb, hoping to quickly reach the top and take off your ring as soon as possible. The ring is still glowing like a single star in the blackest night.
Ogres. The smell of Araj’s blood. Rats. Gale.
Gods, it was useless.
Finally, you reach the top. You rip the ring off your finger and shove it in your pack as soon as your limbs land on the surface of the cave. Astarion quickly scales the rock behind you, and when he reaches the top, you’re positively glaring at him.
“Darling, I’m sorry! I really tried. It’s just— gods damn these mushrooms!” The vampire is ripping off his shirt and scratching at his skin as the two of you walk into the little cave. Before long he’s down to his knickers and cursing as he rubs desperately at his flesh.
You’re trying to ignore your fiancé and quickly pitch the tent so you can handle whatever the hells is going on with him. A sideways glance to your pack reveals that the ring is still glowing quite intensely… perhaps more than it ever has before. Was that even possible? At any rate, you can’t get closer to the stronghold with it glowing like that.
“Astarion, I don’t know what—“ You spin around, and you’re surprised to see the elf fully nude on his blanket, doing perhaps the most provocative thing you’ve ever witnessed.
Astarion is beaded in sweat by now, and his hands are wandering over himself, chasing the burning tingle as it travels through his body. Gods, the feeling was becoming absolutely unbearable. He kept seeing visions of you and him in the throes of passion in his mind.
He couldn’t stop even if he wanted to. Did he want to stop? He couldn’t decide. All he knew was the intense tingling and burning coursing through his veins and the wonderful fantasies filling his brain. He needed release from this torture; his limbs were on fire and the sensation was spreading to his groin.
The elf knows by the throbbing pulse in his cock that his erection is at full capacity, and he feels the dribbles of precum slowly sliding from the head, down the shaft. Astarion is, admittedly embarrassed knowing you are mere feet away and witnessing such an erratic show, but he grabs his own cock regardless— gods, it felt like being possessed. He needed release and he needed it now.
As his fingers wrap around his shaft, a burst of relief travels through his body. The tingling ceases for a moment. But then, it flares again and he’s consumed by the burning feeling and vulgar thoughts of the two of you once more. He pumps his hand a few times, bucking into the sensation, and once again the torturous tingle halts.
What in the hells?
Astarion is now rolling his hips towards his own hand, groaning in pure ecstasy at the relief from the burn as well as the delicious sensation of his hands stroking his uncharacteristically sensitive member. His eyes are clasped closed, and his other hand is still wandering over his torso, chasing that burning itch.
Through panting, shaking breaths he murmurs, “Darling, is it— oh gods, is possible that those— fuck — mushrooms contained sex pollen? I’ve never— mmh, fuck.”
You’d been so enraptured by the vision of your lover touching himself in such an uninhibited display of lust that you almost didn’t hear what Astarion asked. The slickness of your arousal was starting to become apparent as you instinctively squeezed your thighs together.
“I’m… I’m not sure, my love. I’ve read of such things but I’ve never come across it… until, perhaps, now I suppose.”
Astarion isn’t really listening. Instead, he’s bucking wildly into his own hand, chasing his own release. He falls apart in front of you, with his limbs tensed and mouth agape in pure, unadulterated pleasure, clasping tightly onto his own length. The gasping, strangled moan of relief that escapes him as he reaches his climax and shoots sticky streams of hot white seed onto his abdomen ignites a fire in your groin. He’s shuddering with the rippling aftershocks of his orgasm and you feel yourself dripping with arousal as you rub your thighs together once more. This display was entirely feral.
For a few moments the vampire is breathing contentedly, eyes still shut. He’s still holding his cock, which continues to twitch insistently despite its significant spend. Your lover brings his unoccupied hand to his hair and rakes it through his disheveled, sweaty curls.
You flick your gaze to your pack and notice that it’s no longer emitting that ethereal glow. But then Astarion groans in dismay and you see light flare from your bag again. When your attention returns back to your fiancé, he’s already grasping wantonly at a second rapidly growing erection.
“Darling, I can smell you,” He hisses desperately, now slathering his own milky juices around the swollen, reddened tip of his thick cock. The veins in his arm and on his shaft are pulsing as he begins to stroke himself again, “Don’t be coy just— come over here and help me with this. Please.”
And by the gods, he asked so nicely, how could you say no?
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everythingne · 7 months
Text
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ➛ wing damage, chapter one (mv1)
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Eldest of the Halliwell girls, Y/n (or Nadine) gets her heart broken by the man she’s supposed to wed in six months. Four years of love slipping down the drain faster than she can try and grasp at the remaining water droplets.
But... not all hope is lost as far as the f1 community is concerned and they might be right, since Max seems to be trying to get a little closer to his team owners eldest daughter.
max verstappen x influencer!halliwell!reader / fc: sophia la corte (and various ginger women on pinterest.)
warnings & notes: cheating, mentions of alcohol, small age gap (24-27), strong language, probably inaccurate f1 information, using a name as a placeholder for y/n bc i’m not typing that every time, dates are off by two days in the beginning. deal.
EDIT: I love nadine too much to scrap her story even tho christians a BITCH, so for all intents and purposes in this fic, congrats! a spice girl now owns oracle red bull racing 😭
(part two!)
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“Do you want me to confront him?” Max asks, sitting down next to me in the paddock. His hand comes to squeeze my knee, my father rubbing my back as he deletes every photo—every memory of Jacob Taylor from my phone.
Four years down the drain.
My friends back home at my apartment are currently bagging up his stuff. Both Mona and Ally will move in with me, just like college again, once his stuff is empty. My bare apartment will soon be filled with our old nick nacks but i can hardly be happy about it.
Cheated.
The man who spent 50k on an emerald cut four karat ring with a real gold band, cheated? The man who cried when his mom told him she loved me, cheated? The man who cancelled an entire film set because it conflicted with my schedule, cheated? The man who won over the hearts of not only Geri Horner, but Christian Horner? He was the one who cheated?
Jacob was (strong emphasis on the was) the highest standard I ever held. Now, I didn’t even know what standards to have anymore. Anyone could be a cheater. I never stood a chance.
“It’s fine, Max.” I say softly, wiping at my face again to try and make it look less like I’ve been sobbing since I found out as soon as the plane touched down two days ago. The paddock is buzzing, qualifiers getting ready to start for the first GP. The warm Bahraini sun beats down on the track and I can see the heat wiggling above it. Even in March it’s as hot as summer over here, and part of me misses the gloomy, smoggy streets of London right now.
“It’s not fine!” Max groans at me, throwing his head back in exclamation. I know he’s sick and tired of hearing me say it for the thousandth time, but if I say it’s not fine, I’ll break down. And we can’t have that.
“Max,” GP's voice calls before Max can go on another tirade about killing Jacob. Max turns and I can see the hesitance in him to leave my side. He’s been like this since I met him the first day he raced with Red Bull years back—instantly the two of us clicked. When the days got hard, or his dad got on his back a bit too much, I would appear by his side and with a tiny smile somehow I'd fix everything. After I became his sort of 'chauffeur' when one of our drivers got sick in Abu Dhabi his first year, and we got stuck in an hour of traffic with nothing to do but talk, we became basically glued to each others sides.
I think having my unwavering support made a lot of the transition into Red Bull easier for him. And in moments like these, where he's watching me with a keen eye, I don’t know how I lived so long without his calm presence at my side. I was only a five years old when my Mom bought Red Bull Racing, it’s been my entire life, and every racer who has passed through our team has never stuck to my side like Max Verstappen has.
“Go.” I nudge his knee when I see his hand twitch and hover by his helmet, eyes darting to me and then GP who waits in the doorway, so I supply, “I’ll be here when you get back.”
Max nods, giving me a departing hug before he gets up and starts tugging his racing suit on. Immediately my mother replaces him, turning my head to card his hands through my hair.
“Oh, honey.” Geri coos, squeezing my arms as she lets me lean into her, “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry, you didn’t do anything wrong, Mama.” I sigh, leaning into him and letting his wrap his arms tight around me.
“No, I trusted that boy. That’s what I did wrong.” She says back, before handing me back my phone. We sit like that for a long time, people passing us without asking. Everyone knew. I had found out the same way they all did—on social media. Jacob didn’t even have the balls to tell me himself. Fucking coward.
Eventually someone calls my mother away for some celebrity, sp I force myself to sulk off to a hidden corner where I can munch on chocolates and watch Max from a little tv. Not as good as my usual perch next to my Mom, but I don’t need the public seeing me the day I find out my fiancé of several years had been cheating almost the whole time. With his co-star.
Fucking hell.
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nadinehalliwell
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liked by maxverstappen, danielricciardo, charlesleclerc, and 124k others...
nadinehalliwell: before and after max won
tagged: bbhalliwell
gerihalliwell: love u lots mini ginger spice!!!!
⤷ nadinehalliwell: mama ill cry </3
charlesleclerc: maman says hello and that she will have wine for you when you come to monaco
⤷ arthurleclec: nadine you are very beautiful do not let a man win -- maman
⤷ thenadinehorner: OMGGGG <3<3<3 XOXO MAMAN JE VOUS AIME TELLEMENT
bbhalliwell: bahrain was NOT ready for the halliwell girls !!
maxverstappen: you and your sister together is recipe for disaster
⤷ danielricciardo: bet they're planning ur downfall.
⤷ nadinehalliwell: beware both of u 🔪
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I knew returning home to my apartment was going to be hard. I had spent a few days with my mom and Bluebell home in Nottingham.
Being in my mothers had been refreshing enough to start and heal my heart. I also learned that my mom was really fucking good at healing, it involved a lot of wine and a lot of cursing.
My apartment in Monaco had been a home full of happy memories of moving in with Jacob, and our time living together everyday I wasn’t at grand prixs and he wasn’t on set. Memories of our families and friends together with us, and now it would be just me.
So empty. Alone. White walls with no decorations anymore. Just staring at me, closing in slowly.
Opening the door I sucked in a breath of pure agony. My mother's warm hand around my shoulder a soft reminder that even if I felt abandoned, I wasn’t alone. Not by a long shot. And as the door clicks open, my hand finds the lights instinctually, and my eyes widen to dinner plates.
“Welcome home!” a chorus cheers and I laugh, all my of old friends circled around the end of the foyers hallway, wine glasses and soju bottles in hand. I can’t even speak as tears fill my eyes and the girls run to me, waving my mother off. She kisses my hairline, tells me she'll text me when she gets home, and shuts the door as my friends cart me into the kitchen and wipe my tears and fix up my messy hair with giggles.
“Tonight!” One of my friends—eventually I source the drunken giggles to Ally, “we will make you so hot and sexy, he will regret it.”
“And if he comes crawling back!” It’s Mona now.
“We will rip his dick off!” Marija shouts and the girls raise shots to me.
“Guys—what is all of this?” I can’t help but laugh, and then the three look at each other and smile.
“So… you’ve heard of a revenge dress, right?” Ally says slowly, and it all clicks.
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nadinehalliwell
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liked by maxverstappen, charlesleclerc, christianhorner and 976k others..
nadinehalliwell: ‘little black dress, who you doin it for?’ 🖤
tagged: monanotlisa, allycameragirl, marijaswrld
maxverstappen: Is this that ‘hot girl era’ thing?
⤷ charlesleclerc: i think so.
monanotlisa: absolutely sexy. as per usual.
allycameragirl: FUCKKK UR HOT 🖤🖤
landonorris: one direction???
⤷ nadinehalliwell: ofc you know it’s one direction.
⤷ landonorris: cannot tell if this is a compliment or not but thanks ?
marijaswrld: 🧎‍♀️ < me
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dudeitiskarev · 1 year
Text
My One and Only
Paring: Aaron Hotchner x female reader
Summary: It's Derek and Savannah's wedding, and to Hotch, you're the prettiest person in the room.
Content/warnings: mutual pining; secret relationship; food and alcohol consumption; smut (18+ only please. Minors do not engage).
Word count: 7.3k
Author’s note: this one of my all time favorite fics I’ve written that is also based on one of my fav songs by miss Taylor Swift ‘Dress’. thought I’d post it here since I’ve been gaining some new followers and as most of my fics, it’s only on AO3. If you’re new here, welcome and I hope you enjoy! Mwahh!
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         Everyone’s eyes were on the bride—everyone but Hotch’s. Even before the ceremony started, his entire attention was on one of the bridesmaids: You.
         You, on the other hand, were mesmerized by Savannah walking down the aisle in her gorgeous wedding dress—you smiled even bigger when she joined Derek at the altar.
         “My god,” he said, staring into his soon-to-be wife’s eyes with a cheeky smile.
         Only then you sensed a strong gaze on you. You subtly turned your head to the crowd and like a magnet you found Aaron’s eyes. You gave him a quick threatening glance before bringing your attention back to the couple. You could almost hear him chuckle under his breath from that far.
         You’d talked about it when each of you got an invitation and he promised he would ignore you all evening, but it was hard keeping his eyes off you when you looked that stunning. That wouldn’t be a problem if one of Derek’s sisters wasn’t recording the wedding—oh, and if people knew about what you two had.
         “Maybe we should bring a plus one,” you’d told him as an idea to keep the best profilers clueless.  
         You’ve been more than his friend for almost a year and no one suspected a thing—truly. Apparently, profiling never worked when it came to people you interact with daily. You both were experienced profilers too, and since the beginning, you knew well how to act around each other to trick everybody at work into thinking you were still just two normal co-workers that got along.
         That’s how it was for over five years. Then it all changed when you both ended your respective relationships around the same time. Your breakup came first and was messier than his. He was there to catch your tears the same way you were all ears to him. You were lonely together and that woke up feelings neither of you thought would emerge from talking just a bit more than the usual. And one late-night kiss in his office was enough to start whatever you two had going on.
         You’d been confused for a while about how you felt about him and took the initiative to take it forward. You apologized right away because you didn’t plan to kiss him. Ever. But he said nothing, kissed you back, and took you right there over his desk—the first and only time he allowed himself to lose his professionalism at work.
         It was the most mind-blowing sex you’d ever had and you became addicted to it—to him.
         The officiant started his speech and when Derek began to say his vows, you snapped out of your flashbacks, holding your flower bouquet tighter by impulse. Your stomach fluttered while his voice floated inside the intimate venue, and you could only imagine how Savannah was feeling. She brought her palm to her pregnant belly, keeping it there the entire time Morgan spoke his heart out. He was like a brother to you and the fact that he had found the one made you wonder who you were gonna have the chance to share vows with in a hopefully not-so-far future.  
         You slightly turned your head to the crowd again when it was Savannah’s turn, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look at Hotch, the only person you wanted a life with. The person you considered was the one for you.
         God, if he only knew.
         “ ...And I promise to love you, ” she said. “ Today. And tomorrow. And forever... ”
         Every word resonated with how you felt about Aaron and your chest swelled as if she was a messenger of your own heart. You hadn’t told Aaron yet but loved him, you have for a while now, but if there was another feeling beyond love, you sure felt it. You’ve never been so close to grazing the sky like you did whenever he kissed you; electricity rushed through you whenever you two were in between the sheets; with him around, you turned into the most stupid (in love) person in the room and you were more than fine with it.
         "... I'd choose you to be my miracle over and over again. In this world and in any other… ”
         You finally dared to look at him, finding his eyes on you again. Now he was the one who threatened you, gesturing for you to pay attention by raising his brows. You didn’t react—externally, anyway. Your heart was clenching because you’d never had this urge before; to jump over everyone and let the world know he was your miracle. That was the best way to describe who he was to you since he offered to be more than just a shoulder to cry on. He’d made you believe in love again and showed you how broken hearts can mend each other—heal together.
         You took a subtle deep breath and kept your chin up, determined to avoid any unspoken flirting with him until the ceremony got to the exchange of rings, ending with the most romantic kiss you’ve ever witnessed.
         “Okay! That’s enough!” Penelope—one of the bridesmaids too—said jokingly and the happy cheering got quickly replaced with laughs. You allowed yourself to search for Aaron then, something you always did whenever something funny happened just to see him laugh. His dimples were in their glory showing how proud he was. He may have never said it out loud, but you knew how much Morgan meant to him.
         And that was only the beginning of the big event. After the brief ceremony ended, it moved to another venue inside the same hotel and despite all the bright lights and loud music, love was still in the air. It even radiated through every photo taken at the photoshoot setup you and Spencer had built yourselves that same morning.
         “Didn’t know you guys were this artistic,” Morgan grinned as he ran his hand over a wall full of pink and white roses.
         “It actually doesn’t take an artistic person to build this exact wall at all. Even a toddler could’ve done it,” Reid said while nodding, giving him a tight-lipped smile.
         “Don’t listen to him.” You nudged his arm. “It took us four hours to build it.”
         “Oh, yeah,” Spencer agreed. “Four hours and thirteen minutes.”
         “We appreciate the effort,” Savannah laughed. “Now can we please take the pictures? Baby is getting hungry.”
         “Yeah, blame our baby,” Derek mocked her, placing his hand over her belly as he stood behind her, ready to pose in front of the professional camera. “I know you’ve been thinking about dinner all day.”
         Savannah replied something between her teeth that made Derek laugh even more as they posed like the most attractive couple you’ve ever seen.
         “They are so meant to be,” Penelope commented with the biggest smile, snapping her own pictures of them with her phone.
         “I know.” You folded your arms over your chest with a proud smile that disappeared as soon as a familiar perfume enveloped you from behind, making your shoulders stiffen.
         Although… that didn’t stop you from shifting your weight to one foot, a thing that made your curves stand out in a way you knew would only make Hotch react—more so when you were wearing that dress you’d picked with him in mind. His lips always ended up attached to your neck and shoulders. That part of you was his weakness and the day of the bridesmaids fitting, that was only one dress that made you think of his lips.
         He cleared his voice as you expected to start making small talk with Rossi about Jack. You’ve always loved the way his voice became soft when he talked to or about his son. He’d told you how he wanted to bring Jack to the wedding but that he’d chosen to go to a friend’s sleepover—which was understandable. At his age, you would’ve picked your friends over your parent’s friend’s wedding too.
         “Now pictures with your team.” Savannah smiled at Morgan. “You’re gonna want to see them when we’re old.”
         “She’s right,” you popped in. “Come on guys, let’s all take turns to kiss Morgan’s cheek.”
         “Mm-mm.” Derek furrowed his perfect brows, holding up a finger. “I’m a married man now.”
         You stood next to him and pecked his cheek anyway before resting your head over his shoulder and pouting your lips in a fake-sad face.
         “Spencer, you were so right,” you said loud enough for everybody to hear in between camera flashes.
         “I know. About what? Exactly?”
         “Today really should be a national day of mourning for all of us Derek lovers.”
         “Oh, come on now.” Morgan swung his arms over yours and Penelope’s shoulder. “Just because I officially belong to my woman doesn’t mean you can’t love me anymore.”
         “That’s true,” Savannah agreed.
         You blew her a kiss that was sure caught on camera, then the messy BAU photoshoot started. Everyone traded places every three pictures, and in the last set you ended up in the middle of Emily and Hotch. There he went again, clearing his voice just to say nothing. He hesitated to place a hand on you, so you did him the favor and broke his awkwardness by wrapping your arm around his waist—and Emily’s too, of course.
         “Is that a new perfume?” She sniffed next to your ear.
         “It is,” you acted surprised, turning your head to her but clutching your hand against Hotch’s waist to get his attention—as if it wasn’t already on you. You’d sprayed some of the perfume he kept at your place and some of yours too over it, creating a whole new scent.
         “I like it. It’s very… you.”
         “Thanks.”
         You could tell Aaron was trying hard to stay away from you as much as he could, leaning more to the opposite side. You did the same, pretending that Emily was the only person you were taking pictures with.
         Then after the rest of the guests got pictures with the newlyweds too, the party began. The team had their own designated table. You took a short bathroom break before settling and when you came back, the only empty seat was next to Hotch.
         There was no other choice, but you weren’t complaining.
         Your dress lifted to your mid-thighs as you sat down and it got even higher when you crossed your legs, exposing your bare skin a lot more. Aaron shifted on his seat, bringing his clasped hands up attempting to cover his mouth.
         He got so damn tense.
         “What’s the menu?” You asked everyone, subtly moving your legs under the table to touch Hotch’s.
         “You, apparently.” JJ raised her brows, gesturing behind you. “The photographer’s had his eyes on you all night.”
         “What?” You asked with a soft laugh, genuinely clueless.
         “Oh my god!” Penelope grabbed Jj’s arm in surprise. “I thought that was my imagination! He’s smoking hot.”
         You turned your head and caught the guy pointing the camera at your table. He really was attractive, but Jj might have been exaggerating because he gave you the kindest smile.
         “The alcohol is getting to your head already.” You rolled your eyes and scooted your chair closer to the table.
         “I don’t blame him, though.” Emily eyed you up and down while whistling. Even Spencer took a good look at you.  “I wouldn’t be surprised if there were more pictures of you in there than Savannah.”
         “Well, he better take pictures of my good side if that’s the case,” you played along.
         “Oh sweets, you don’t have a bad sid–” Three constant clinks of metal hitting a glass got everyone’s attention. “Quiet now.” Penelope shushed herself, getting her phone out again to record Derek’s sister’s speech. “Sarah’s gonna talk.”
         Aaron subtly moved his leg under the table and kept his feet next to yours. Whenever you sat next to him at the round table—which wasn't often—his feet always found yours. It was his way of saying he wasn’t being cold towards you as he pretended to be. And you hoped that was a new way of showing he’d gotten a little jealous about the hot photographer.
         You wanted to tease him about it, run your fingers through the back of his head and assure him you had eyes for him only. Because you did, more so when he'd chosen one of his navy blue and perfect-tailored suits that made it hard keeping your hands to yourself.
         You took a quick glance at his usually furrowed brows before focusing on the fun stories family members had to tell. You had a permanent smile on your face during dinner as they talked about Savannah's childhood and teenage years. There was a lot you didn't know about her despite her becoming one of your closest friends.
         Unlike Derek. You'd heard at least ten different versions of the same stories and you never got tired of it. And on a more serious note, his mom brought up his dad with pictures of him projected on a screen, reminding Derek how proud he truly must be for his son starting his own family.
         Morgan being emotional has always got to you. You knew how much he wished his son could’ve had the chance to meet his grandfather, but the sad moments didn’t last long. The dessert brought the sweetness and soon, it was time to get to the dance floor.
         You weren’t the greatest dancer, but you knew how to move so you were designated to keep the guests motivated to dance with the other. You took the chance to at least dance one song with everyone—including Hotch. You tried to keep things low-key as always, so you decided to walk up to him, choosing to dance with Rossi first.
         “Wanna dance?” You stretched out your hand to him.
         “Ehh...” David hesitated. “Maybe later. Take Aaron first.”
         “Don’t be lazy, Rossi. Come on.” You played it cool, ignoring Aaron completely.
         “I’ll sacrifice myself for you.” Hotch tapped David’s shoulder as he took the last sip of his drink and rose from his chair.
         “Sacrifice yourse-?” You looked at Hotch with a frown then waved your hand dismissively mid-sentence, casually holding him by his arm and said to Rossi, “You can’t escape me, Dave.”
         “If you find me,” he barked back and worked his way to the bar with his empty glass in his hand.
         You shared a casual laugh with Aaron as your feet took you to the dance floor.
         “Don’t make it awkward.” You wrapped your arms around his neck. Nothing special, just like you’d done with Spencer a few songs earlier. The only difference was that Spencer didn’t make you feel like the prettiest girl in the room.
         “I’m not,” he chuckled next to your ear and kept his hand respectfully over your upper back while the other stayed just a little lower as if you were made out of glass.  
         There’d been two slow songs in a row and the DJ didn’t seem to have the intention to change the mood just yet. They even lowered the lights, creating a romantic ambiance. Or maybe that was just your imagination and the fact that you were actually in his arms with everyone around like you’ve always wanted.
         “We’ve never danced before,” you murmured close to his ear trying to keep an unamused face. You prayed your voice got lost with the music so the people dancing around you couldn’t hear how you were trying to flirt with him.
         “We haven’t.” He softened his voice too. “But we’ve done way more than that.”
         There was a twitch of a smile threatening to take over your lips, but you didn’t let it slip. Instead, you took a deep breath and slowly let it out as you said, “We have.”
         It was strange. You were used to having his hands on you behind closed doors;  inside a room where the only noise was his heartbeat against your ear. But like you said, you weren’t about to make it awkward. You cherished the moment because this was probably the closest you’ll ever get to be with him in front of everyone without them saying a thing. So you stayed there, hands clasped behind his neck as if it meant nothing – as if they weren’t shaking; as if you weren’t dying to just grab his face, kiss him in the middle of the dance, and whisper I love you for the first time one breath away from his soft lips.
         “You’re tense,” he murmured.
         “So are you.” You smiled, finding Jj’s eyes over Aaron’s shoulder along the way.
         You pretended the smile was because of her and made an uncomfortable face, gesturing at Hotch with wide eyes. She’d never said a thing to you, but you were afraid she might be the only one who could suspect something about you and Hotch.
         You were casually texting Hotch who was only a few feet away from you in his office about the plans you two had for the night, and you didn’t notice Jj had walked up to you from behind. She scared the shit out of you and you suspiciously locked your phone.
         " Hiding something ?" She raised her brows.
         " Uh… it's a surprise ," you lied. Which she believed—or you hoped she did—since her birthday was coming soon.
         You told Hotch about it and he reminded you to be more careful when you made it to his place later that night. And though you liked how things were with him, you couldn’t deny that type of coldness hurt a little too.
         “Is that really my perfume?” He kept his voice quiet.
         “I don’t know. Is it?”
         He subtly breathed you in and you almost melted in his arms. “It’s sweeter on you.”
         You caught the photographer shooting pictures of you and Aaron and you waited until he moved around to tell Hotch, “I– I booked us a room. I thought since you gave us off tomorrow we could enjoy this place a little more.”
         “What am I supposed to do with that information?”
         “811,” you said before the song ended.
         Breaking that dance left you with an empty feeling. That’d never happened to you before – missing him while he was in the same room as you – but for whatever reason, that dance meant a lot to you.
         You tried to fill in that hole by dancing with the girls though it didn’t work much. You took a break from dancing and made your way to a quiet lounge room in the open. The sky was clear and the soft breeze was the only one who kept you company as you finished your third glass of wine.
         “Do you mind some company?” An unfamiliar voice said from behind.
         “Jesus christ!” You brought your hand to your chest startled.
         Maybe it was enough wine for the night.
         You turned around and caught a charming smile and a camera hanging from his neck.
         “Sorry,” the photographer laughed. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
         “No, you’re fine,” You laughed too.
         “I’m Louis.”
         You shook his hand and introduced yourself too. It may have been the alcohol but the guy was really funny and got to make you laugh more than once. You would’ve kept having a good time if he hadn’t tried to be smart.
         “So, would you like to grab a drink with me after the wedding?”
         Of course, he was trying to get inside your panties. What a turn-off.
         “Sorry, but I’m taken,” you said without hesitation.
         You really weren’t, though.
         “Oh,” he looked around. “Well, is he here?”
         Speak of the devil.
         A silhouette at the corner of your eyes stole your attention.
         There was Aaron—and Morgan—walking to the lounge room too with drinks in their hands. You wondered who’s idea was it to come just when you were being hit on by some guy.
         Derek teased you with his brows while there was nothing humorous on Aaron’s face. You focused on Louis again, but the smile on your face was because of Hotch. Jealous Hotch.  
         “No,” you finally responded, sighing deep. “But I don’t see how that matters. I’m still taken.”
         “You’re right, you’re right.”
         Nothing about Louis was interesting after you studied his behaviour and read his intentions. Still, you let him flirt with you—and definitely pretended to flirt back hoping Aaron would notice—until he excused himself to go back to his job.
         You wiggled your fingers as a goodbye and slowly made your way to Morgan and Hotch, making your heels clack more than you had to.
         “Someone took a special interest in you,” was the first thing Morgan said.
         You stood in front of them, clasping your hands behind your back, and shrugged carelessly. “You think?”
         "Princess, don’t act like you don’t know what you were doing.”
         “What do you mean?”
         “Batting those eyelashes, laughing too much, touching his shoulder–”
         “You think that was flirting?” you cut him off.
         “It was to me.” Morgan looked at Hotch.
         “Hotch?” You—subtly—taunted. “You think that was flirting?”  
         It wasn’t the first time someone has hit on you right in front of him, but police officers weren’t as much of a threat to him as a photographer was, apparently.
         “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you flirt—” he confidently responded “—so I wouldn’t know.”
         “I’ve seen her. She does this thing with her eyes,” Morgan kept going. “I’m telling you, Hotch, she was flirting.”
         “That was bad flirting.” You rolled your eyes. “Which somehow still works with guys like him.”
         “ Bad flirting? Well now I want to see your good flirting,” Derek continued, but his duties as a groom were needed and his name being called from the microphone saved you from that.
         It was just you and Hotch now.
         “Aren’t you afraid people are gonna see us, alone?” You stayed put on your feet, holding back the urge to get closer to him.
         “Not really, we’re just talking.” He raised his brows as he spoke.
         “We are.” Your eyes went to his lips and lingered there as you licked your own. “Party should be over soon, so… I’ll go back inside now. Are you coming?”
         “In a little bit.” He gestured at his drink.
         “Okay.” You took a step back. “I’ll see you around, I guess.”
         “811,” he responded, sliding one hand inside his pocket and saluting you with his glass with the other.
         You subtly tugged your bottom lip in between your teeth and eyed him up and down. You knew exactly what you were doing, indeed. “811.”
         “Is this what your good flirting looks like?” He asked in a teasing tone as you were about to turn around.
         “I don’t know.” You matched his voice, tilting your head to the side. “I’m not very good at it.”
         He gave you a look that pierced through you, but you didn’t expose yourself and left him all alone.
         You impatiently counted heads once the guests started to leave and shared a few secret glances with Aaron the rest of the night, which built in the anticipation. But sooner than later, the party was finally over.  
         “Who’s leaving with us?” Emily massaged her temple.
         You didn’t pay attention to who answered as you were searching for Hotch. At this point, you weren’t even trying to be subtle about missing him, but he’d vanished.
         Or so you thought.
         You made it to your room almost with your heart broken, but when you checked your phone, his name lit up on the screen.
         I’m gonna walk around for a while.
         He was being careful—as always.
         The alcohol had worn off already, and you needed some more. You ordered a bottle of wine to the room to make the wait more bearable and paced back and forth around the room waiting for it until the expected knock on your door blared inside the bedroom.
         You smoothed down your dress and slowly worked your way to the door, dragging it open.
         Not room service.
         Aaron's broad shadow was standing there, both hands in his pocket.
         “Didn’t front desk give you a key?” You let him in.
         He shut the door behind him and kept on walking, forcing you to take a few steps back as he said, “they did.”
         “Then why did you knock?” You stopped in the middle of the room.
         “To make it more interesting.”
         “You’re funny,” you laughed, wrapping your arms around his neck the way you'd meant to do while you danced, staring up at him. “Did anyone see you?”
         “No.” He delicately brushed his fingers across your cheek and placed a tender kiss on the other. “Did you have fun?”
         “Yeah.” You grabbed his tie to bring him closer and closed your eyes. “You?”
         “This dress—” he murmured in your ear “—had me distracted the entire evening.”
         “I knew you’d like me in it.”
         He smirked as his lips traveled from your jaw to the corner of your mouth. Then he finally kissed you.
         It was tender—too tender.
         “It was made for you.” He ran his thumb over your bottom lip while murmuring against them.
         “It was made for you to take it off,” you whispered and brought your hands to the back of his head, pressing your lips with his into the wet, desperate kiss you’ve been wanting all night.
         His arms enveloped you entirely and his tongue didn’t hesitate to sweep yours. You’ve longed to have his rough touch melting into your skin for what seemed ages. It was always like that. After spending an entire day treating each other like any other mortal—when it was just the two of you—you both acted like two different people that had too many clothes. But it was more than that too.
         To you, at least. And you liked to think that it was mutual.
         “It’s always hard to keep my eyes and hands off you,” he said out of breath, letting the kiss rest. “But today—” he pecked your lips “—you almost made me want to risk it all.”
         You returned the gentle kiss. “Why didn’t you?”
         That was a heartfelt question that he’d rather let get lost in the desire.
         His lips collided with yours again as his hands confidently sneaked under your dress, groping you with hunger. “God, I knew you were wearing the tiniest panties under it.”
         “I chose these for you too.” You whimpered when he lifted his mouth to your neck and nibbled your skin.
         “Not wedding appropriate at all,” he murmured in a playful tone while kissing your shoulder. He teased the strap of your dress with the tip of his tongue, lifting it off your skin and pulling it down your arm with his teeth. “Do you have to return it?”
         “No,” you gasped. “It’s mine.”
         “Good, because I’m gonna fuck you in it.” He scooped you by your thighs and plopped you on the bed, settling in between your legs. He trailed kisses from your mouth down your jaw and neck, getting rid of his jacket and tie in the process. “You should wear my perfume more often,” he panted onto the crook of your neck, nibbling your skin.
         “Does it turn you on?” Your hands flew to tug on his hair. “Smelling yourself on me?”
         With each of his kisses, your desire for him grew. Your heartbeat dropped to your pussy within seconds and it was nothing but ache and warm arousal leaking off you.
         “Everything about you makes me hard.” He started to grind his hips while his lips went back to capture yours. “The things you do to me, can you feel it?”
         You moaned into his mouth, wrapping your legs around his waist. His erection rubbed against you, nestling almost too perfectly in between your still clothed folds.
         “Yeah.” You bucked your hips to meet his.
         “Yeah?” He pulled back, breaking the desperate kiss.
         This time you were only able to nod and lift your hips off the bed to help him get rid of your panties. He dragged them down your thighs teasingly slow and threw them in the air.
         The hungry look in his eyes while he lowered himself and lifted your dress up to your waist sent sparkles all over you. Your bare flesh was exposed to him now and though it was fascinating how he seemed to be at your will when you were that weak in front of him, you couldn’t deny how intimidating it was.
         “I need you so bad.” You bent your legs up to your chest, tempting him with how wet you were.
         He petted your sensitive clit with his thumb twice with a cocky smile before making himself comfortable by rolling up his sleeves and laying on his stomach so his arms would wrap around your thighs. His face now was one kiss away from your slick folds.
         That embarrassed you in the beginning—how fucking wet he made you and how fast—but that only meant how much you wanted him, and you knew he loved the effect he had on you.
         “How much do you want to come?” He kissed your inner thighs, digging his fingers on them too.
         “Surprise me.” You relaxed your arms above your head, ready to receive whatever he wanted.
         He ghosted a smile over you before circling the tip of his nose on your clit. You were so sensitive there already your body jerked a little at that first contact. His nose then was replaced with his chin, tracing rougher circles, and when he laid a light-feather kiss right there , you decided to close your eyes and enjoy the endless minutes of pleasure Aaron was about to give you.
         There was no doubt he truly enjoyed being nose deep in between your legs, so you never felt bad when it was just him who used his mouth like that during sex.
         “ That feels so good, ” you praised him, bringing your hand to his hair and running your fingers through it.
         He hummed in response, sucking your clit into his mouth with light pressure and smoothly adding two fingers inside of you.
         You rolled your hips against his face and in no time stars took over your eyes.
         “Oh my g– mmm.” You pressed your lips together to shut yourself up because, shit, you were being embarrassingly loud and you didn’t want to let everyone know how good you were being fucked by Aaron’s mouth.
         “I’ve been waiting all day to hear you moan.” He kept going with his skilled motions . “Let me hear you.”
         His pleas were powerful and you couldn’t avoid letting yourself go. You moaned—loud—and smiled through it all because he deserved to know how good he made you feel; how good he was to you; how generous.
         After that one, he went in—all in.
         God, Aaron.
         Fuck.
         Just like that.
         Please don’t stop.
         Your mouth went dry from how much you praised him and gasped in pleasure. His mouth was exquisite. Every flick of his tongue and each sloppy sound he made brought you closer and closer to the—
         Knock. Knock. Knock.
         —Clouds.
         Knock. Knock. Knock.
         You were snapped out of what was supposed to be your fourth orgasm, propping yourself on your elbows.
         Knock. Knock. Knock.
         “Fuck,” you threw yourself back down in annoyance. “I ordered that like half an hour ago.”
         “That what?” Aaron said and went back to eat you out.
         “ Mmh, wine.”
         “More wine?” He reached for the closest piece of clothing and wiped his mouth, chin and fingers with them.
         “What are you doing?”
         “I’ll be right back.”
         He took a moment to adjust his erection inside his pants and worked his way to receive the wine.
         “Thanks.”  
         The way he just casually said that got a laugh from you.
         “What?” He placed the wine and two glasses over the night stand.
         “Do you think he could tell what you were doing just now?” you laughed again, propping your knee up and playing with the hem of your dress.
         “I hope he did.” He crawled in bed next to you and smiled into a kiss, sneaking his hand in between your legs.
         He started to massage your clit right away. It felt good, but you needed him. “Hotch, just fuck me already.”
         “Give me one more.” He grunted mid-sentence. “One more and then I’m all yours.”
         How could you ever say no to that?
         He rubbed your clit like he was against the clock, so fast and with the perfect amount of pressure.
         There was that pleasure building once again.
         Your sweet moans bounced within the room as the tingling sensations spread through you.
         "Fuck, Hotch I—" you fisted the bed covers under you and turned your head to him searching for his eyes.
         "I know, honey , I know." He had his eyes shut and brushed his nose across your cheek, subtly hissing under his breath as if he was in pain.
         That word only slipped when he was pleasing you. You reached for his hand while you came, clenching and unclenching around his fingers.
         You swept your tongue across his top lip to thank him with a desperate kiss. You hadn’t noticed how he had his eyes shut and his brows furrowed. You kept your eyes open to admire how much he was enjoying it and let your voice be free.
         “There we go,” he whispered. “Good. So, so good.”
         “It feels so good,” you whimpered.
         “I know it does.” He kept lightly tapping your sensitive clit making your body jerk a few times. “Feels so good for me too.”
         “Fuck. Please?” You begged.
         He brought his milked fingers up to your mouth and slid them in and out so you’d clean them up, and pecked your cheek as if saying yes, now.
         You clasped your mouths together and stood on your knees to help him get rid of his clothes between more desperate kisses. Your fingers shook as you undid his belt, and when all of his clothes ended up scattered over the floor, you lay on your back.
         He adjusted himself in between your legs and slapped the head of his cock over your clit a few times while pinching your nipples, turning them into tight tempting buds.
         “Fill me in, please,” you bit your lip, roaming your hands up and down over his forearms and biceps.
         He reached for his pants and got a condom from his pocket. Your first time with him was the only time you took him raw, and you had to admit you wanted his bare skin rubbing inside of you again.
         You stayed quiet while he tore the foil open and rolled it down his length, then without much warning, Hotch grabbed you by your hips and harshly flipped you around, angling your ass up in full display for him. You gasped between a small startled laugh, your cheek pressed onto the pillow.
         It wasn’t often that he allowed himself to be this harsh with you, but when he did you knew you were about to be sent out of the orbit.
         “Sorry about that,” he said in a cocky, deep voice that only got a moan from you in a positive response.
         One hand circled your ass while the other guided his cock at your entrance, slipping it in just a bit. You wiggled your ass and continued what he started, letting him inside you inch by slow inch.
         He groaned like a god and slid your dress up to your ribs, almost, but you didn’t want it off just yet. Like he said, you were waiting for him to fuck you in it. He withdrew his hips a bit to plunge hard into you again, making your ass bounce violently.
         Then began to pound into you—hard.
         You reached for his forearm and held onto it, glancing at him over your shoulder but your own smile distracted you mid way through.
         There was a mirror perfectly placed by the bed, giving you the breathtaking view of Aaron slamming his body into yours from behind. It was mesmerizing—the way he threw his head back and licked his lips while gripping your hips until his fingertips disappeared into your skin.
         You made eye contact with yourself, bringing your hand up to your mouth and caught your own moans against your palm, dissolving in the moment. The curves of his cock fit you everywhere and reached your spot with each of his loud thrusts.
         “ Oh shit, oh fuck. ” You muffled your moans into a pillow, squeezing your eyes shut.
         That’s never been one of your preferred positions. He went too deep and it’d hurt at times, but it hurt so damn good you arched your back even more and let yourself drown in the way he dug himself in you.
         “ So fucking good. ” You smiled, “ fuck, fuck ,fuck .”
         By the time your skin was glowing red by how hard his skin slammed against yours, you stood up on your knees and pressed your back onto his chest, turning your head asking for a kiss. He gave you his tongue while his hands reached for the hem of your dress, pulling it up and finally peeling it off your skin in the middle of softer thrusts.
         He pulled you close and kept plunging into you until his breathings grew loud, his muscles tensed and his cock twitched inside of you, groaning deep at the back of your head. He wrapped his arms around you like his life depended on it—with a kind of passion that could’ve easily been mistaken with love.
         You turned your head searching for his lips and return that same passion, but he circled his nose with yours and ghosted your lips with his breath.
         A tender frown took over his face while his eyes scanned your face from up close.  There was a glimpse of vulnerability in him right then. You couldn’t quite read what it meant, but it weakened you on the inside.
         “God, look at you.” He smiled, and finished with one last soft kiss.
         You both dropped like dead weight on the bed facing each other, legs and arms interlaced together.
         It was still there—that look. You could almost see right through him.
         He took a moment to toss the condom into the trash then joined you in bed again, bringing you close into a hug.
         “You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to. I know you want to be home when Jack gets back.”
         “I’d love to stay.” He kissed you. “But yeah, tomorrow we have early soccer practice.”
         You returned the kiss while nodding and brought your hand up to stroke his cheek. It was soft and cold with sweat which you kindly brushed away with your thumb.
         If someone asked you two years ago if you ever imagined yourself like this—with an after-sex glow—because of Aaron Hotchner, you would’ve bursted out laughing. You still couldn’t understand how you ended up finding the love you always wanted in someone you’d known for half a decade.
         Sometimes, all those years where nothing more than a polite handshake and respectful hugs happened felt like a waste of time. Other times, you convinced yourself it was meant to happen that way.
         You stared at each other in silence and just the sound of the city in the background.
         “Did you get jealous tonight?” You spoke after a moment, tracing random patterns over his chest.
         His brows raised, thinking about it. “I might’ve.”
         “I kinda’ liked it.”
         “I bet you did.” He pecked your lips almost to erase your mocking smile.
         “It suits you. The jealousy.”
         “Well, it’s not a very nice feeling.”
         “But it’s hot.”
         “Oh?” He licked his lips. “You think I’m hot?”
         “I didn’t say that.”
         “I think you did.” He kissed your ear.
         You let him pepper you with kisses. Kisses that felt like home. Kisses that made you want to break the stupid wall you both had built and just confess how much you loved him; how you wanted those kisses all over your skin for the rest of your life.
         “Hotch?” Your voice came out small as if anyone else could hear you.
         “Mmh?” He groaned into another kiss.
         “I– I think I–” I think I love you. “I think I’m gonna go home too.”
         “You sure?” He pulled back and frowned with curiosity.
         “Yeah.”
         “Okay, I’ll call us a cab.”
         “Okay. I’m gonna shower first.”
         “Care if I join you?”
         “Not at all.”
         You ended up doing way more than just showering together, though.
         There was a large window in front of a spacious jacuzzi that let in the shimmering city lights. You didn’t even know you’d booked such a fancy hotel room. It was the perfect place to drink that expensive bottle of wine.
         You both relaxed in the tub, drinking off the bottle between slightly drunk laughs.
         Time with Hotch went by too fast, and if you hadn’t spilled the last drops of the wine in the bath you would've stayed there until the morning.
         “Now you can call your taxi friend.” You wiped a happy tear from the corner of your eye, wrapping yourself in a towel.
         You walked back to the room and searched for your dress. It’d landed over his jacket as if they were two matching pieces made by the same tailor.
         You handed him his clothes and dressed together, stealing glances. You really wanted to stay the night with him. You almost provoked him with the dress so you both ended up in bed again, but you kept your cool and made it out of the room.
         You were waiting for the elevator when someone came out of the room right next to it.
         Oh no.
         “What’s going on here?” Morgan’s eyes widened as he made a little gesture between you and Hotch with his pointer finger.
         “I– uh…” You looked up at Aaron. He was just as flustered as you, and the alcohol in your blood didn’t help much. “We uh–”
         It took Derek three seconds to put two and two together.
         “Please don’t tell me it was you who had that moaning symphony going on.”
         “W–what?” Your face was burning right now.
         “Hotch? Really?” Morgan seemed more hurt than anything else. He was your best friend after all.
         “I’ll explain it to you when you get back from your honeymoon.” You reached for Aaron’s hand and walked away as fast as you could without looking back while saying loudly, “Have fun in Cancún!”
         You hurried through the hotel hallways, paid the room and hopped in the back of the taxi without saying a word to each other. If you hadn’t booked a room at the same hotel, Morgan would’ve never found out and your most precious relationship would’ve still been a secret.
         The ride was quiet, but Aaron never let go of your hand. At least, he wasn’t mad about it. Or if he was, he didn’t want you to know. You felt guilty about it, but it felt so good too. You stayed looking out the window to avoid looking at him.
         Fifteen minutes later, he broke the silence.
         “Hey.” You turned your head to him and stared for the longest second before he spoke again, “I love you. Secret’s out. And I don’t want to hide us anymore. There’s no reason to.”
         Your heart started to race so fast inside your chest you couldn’t form any coherent words.
         “We’re here.” The driver glanced at you both through the rearview mirror.
         You were still trying to process what the love of your life had just said.
         “Hey, love birds, I ain’t got all night. It’s thirty bucks and counting,” the man spoke again.
         “Do you want to come inside? So that I can show you how much I love you too?” Was all you could say as you reached inside your purse to shut the driver up.
         But he didn’t. “Tik tok, tik tok, my friends.”
         “I–” Aaron sucked in a short breath, reaching for his wallet faster than you and handing the man his money. “I think that’s a good idea.”
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Text
Is It Over Now?
Rafe Cameron x Reader
angst, angst, angst
Word Count: 1K
Summary: Breaking up with Rafe was one of the hardest things to do, but at least you’d be free and feel good right? …Right?
A/N: I’ve never written a fic before um
And did you think I didn't see you?
There were flashing lights
At least I had the decency
To keep my nights out of sight
Rafe Cameron, a name you hear all throughout Kildare, not always in a good context but often with the name Y/N L/N attached to it. Since in diapers you and Rafe knew each other. Best friends to lovers is what it was, the perfect trust fund kids who were destined to eventually fall in love, wed and have the perfect fairytale family together.
It truly was all on that track before the small cracks in the relationship weren’t talked through and patched but left neglected and unattended till there were too many to handle and she cracked.
After the break up you took the time to reconnect with everything you neglected throughout your romantic relationship with Rafe. Your friends, family, yourself. This time was the first time you’ve felt free since you started dating Rafe, the memories and time with him prior that were strictly as friends were the best years of your life, and so was the beginning of dating him. Till you realized while Rafe slowly destroyed himself with his malicious coping behaviours of drugs and violence, he was also destroying you.
Consoling him and endless ways to help him always worked with him, honestly anything that was just with you. But focusing all your attention into making sure he was okay, drained from your duties to make sure you were okay.
Suddenly everything just revolved around Rafe and you couldn’t take it anymore. I mean, you took a whole gap year for him from university that eventually turned into two, which eventually turned into not going anymore because you were scared he was going to get himself killed.
Even after everything you did for Rafe including putting your life on hold, gave him no mercy to show he was “okay” without you. The rates of parties at the Tanney Hill spiked up and so did the amount of girls in the Outer Banks whispering about their amazing night together with Rafe Cameron.
Worst of all you couldn’t say it didn’t bother you. Even with everything you still loved Rafe, a person and love that you had can’t just be erased. Then again, your journey to reconnect with everyone meant reconnecting with friends, which meant reconnecting with the party life.
The difference between you and Rafe was at least you had the decency to keep your nights out of sight, keeping it low and minimal and not throwing it out to the entire country that you were now single and ready to do anything with anyone now.
Let's fast forward to three hundred awkward blind dates later
If she's got blue eyes, I will surmise that you'll probably date her
You dream of my mouth before it called you a lying traitor
You search in every model's bed for something greater
Perfect, everything’s been “perfect”. Three weeks after the break up you’d say you’d been doing okay but some things just don’t feel right anymore. The high of being free was finally settling into the reality that you’ve lost your best friend and boyfriend.
Although Rafe was draining and depended on you like you were his nurse, he also was still your boyfriend. Or now ex-boyfriend. All the little things you began to miss and thoughts of “did i make the right decision?” Scathed your mind over and over. You didn’t think you could go anywhere without seeing something that reminded you of him, not even your own bedroom.
It wasn’t till a trip to the country club when you saw Rafe with an oddly familiar aura with him.
The girl he was with looked exactly like you. Her hair, her eyes, her smile. Irritation fills your body, you thought you’d been going crazy when the other night you told your friends the theory that Rafe was only going with other girls that resembled you but this really confirmed it because this girl was an exact clone of you.
Did he dream of my mouth while he kissed her? While he did anything with her? Because he knew well off in no matter how many girls beds he climbed into he’d never find anything greater.
Let's fast forward to three hundred takeout coffees later
(Flashing lights) I was hoping you'd be there
And say the one thing (oh, Lord) I've been wanting (oh, Lord)
But no
2 AM, you’ve been at this party for eight hours in honest hopes you’d bump into Rafe. You couldn’t take it anymore. You were weak and missed him. Every thought you had was of him and seeing him so easily run off with half Kildare’s population was killing you. That’s why you were here. You took the entire day to mentally and physically prepare yourself to see him at the party and get him back. It was pathetic but you couldn’t take it anymore.
But he never came. You sat in the corner of all these sweaty people dancing and snorting drugs for hours and Rafe never showed up. You thought about calling him, or just texting him but even that was too much.
On your way out of the party you hear a ping from your phone and open it to a message from your friend that sent you Rafe’s most recent post.
It was of her. That girl from the country club. The girl from the club sitting in your spot, your hidden, secret secluded beach spot that you and Rafe discovered in sixth grade near the water that tourists and locals didn’t even know about.
Your heart shattered. Tears spilled down your face as you crumbled down to take a seat on the houses front steps.
It was so naïve of you to even think that Rafe wouldn’t exploit that spot. You knew how petty he was. You should of seen in coming. Yet deep down you were hoping that it would never get to that point.
But here you were, on the front steps of a random house party sobbing into your hands all because you truly believe that Rafe Cameron was going to come to the party and say the words you’ve been yearning to hear from him again.
I Love You
How foolish.
pt. 2…?
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yayakoishii · 9 months
Note
Hello, I’ve loved seeing all of your One Piece content recently! Could I request a Sanji and a fellow straw hat reader who recently got married? I saw something recently about how once Sanji gets married, there would come a moment where someone would call ‘Vinsmoke’ and both would turn their heads and it would just cause Sanji to get emotional because he finally shares a last name with someone who doesn’t see him as worthless. Someone who instead looks at him like he single-handedly placed every star in the sky. If you don’t end up writing this that’s alright, I at least wanted to share this little scenario.
Vinsmoke | Sanji x Reader
Fandom: One Piece
Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji x Reader
Word Count: 600
Genre: Fluff, minor angst?
A/n: *laughs in still haven't read past Ch. 526* Hey there requester <3 Firstly, I'm happy to hear you enjoy my writing! Thank you so much for this absolutely lovely request. You actually requested it when they were closed but I found it too cute and wanted to write it– even though I haven't reached that part in the manga yet. But, I wrote based on the things I learnt from fanfics (and whatever I got spoiled about, lol) so this might be inaccurate? I would have loved to expand but I need to know the entire backstory properly before I could do that TT Still, I had a fun time writing this cute drabble! Hope you enjoy it ♡
also available on ao3!
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Sanji woke up to the most beautiful sight in his entire life– you lying next to him, curled up against his chest from where he could see your hair spilling over the pillow and your relaxed face. This was the sight he was going to wake up every day to, from now on, and the thought of it made him feel like the most blessed man on Earth.
You shifted a little, burrowing closer into him, as if you two were already sticking to each other. He could feel your skin on his own, reminders of the night before but all he could feel at the moment was overwhelming love. He couldn't hold back when he saw your hand with a ring come up to lie above his heart. The choked off sound he let out woke you up, and you looked up at him with sleepy puffy eyes.
"Sanji…?" You mumbled, humming in contentment when he wrapped you up in his arms. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing, my love," he said quietly, gathering you into his arms, his own wedding band grazing your back as he did so. You shivered at the sudden cold touch but looked at him with dopey eyes full of so much love that he felt blinded. "Just thinking of how lucky I am."
The two of you eventually rolled out of the hotel bed and got ready to leave for your trip. You were on your honeymoon, a week long trip to a famous vacation island that had a lot of fun activities. Sanji had gotten ready first and gone down to the lobby to discuss something with the staff. You hurried up and joined him there after you had made sure that all the marks he left on you were hidden well under your clothes. You were not embarrassed by them – but you were also a private person who preferred to keep certain things to yourself. The love Sanji made to you was something no one else has to see or know. It was something just for you to experience.
You checked out at the reception since you had the room key and were about to make your way to Sanji when the hotel staff behind you suddenly called out, "Vinsmoke-san?"
"Yes?" You turned around automatically, feeling a little giddy. You had been preparing for this ever since Sanji proposed to you. To be called by his name, to be called his…
You didn't notice Sanji's reaction because of your own thoughts. The blonde had turned to answer the call only to be left dumbfounded when he realised the staff had called for you. You, who were now Vinsmoke (Y/n), had replied back with so much ease, like you had been answering to it your whole life.
And it was like someone had pulled his heart out of his chest and clenched it– it was both painful and pleasing to him that you were a Vinsmoke now. The first one to always be by his side, the first one to protect him even though he was clearly no longer the weak boy he once was. The first one to look at him like he hung the stars in the sky, the first one to love and accept him for who he was– you were now his first, real family. The family he had chosen and started. The family who loved him.
"Sanji?" Your concerned voice jolted him out of his thoughts and he blinked, feeling his eyes wet suddenly. His face was cradled gently in your soft hands as you looked up at him, silently asking him why he was about to cry. "What got you like this?"
Sanji swallowed the heavy lump he could feel in his throat, like his emotions had turned into a ball and were trying to come up his throat. He blinked away the last vestiges of his tears, instead wrapping you up in his arms again.
"You being mine now," he whispered, knocking his forehead gently against yours. His clear blue eyes looked straight into yours as he added, "In heart, mind, name and life."
°•❀•°
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littledovesnow · 6 months
Text
vows
the wedding vows <3
word count: idk like 1k i think??
a/n: i cried writing this lol, also didn't proof this at all
-----
“Are you nervous?” You asked, sitting in the bridal suite with your newly minted husband, who kept spinning his new ring adorning his finger.
Shaking his head, he smiled up at you. “Not at all, gorgeous. Are you nervous? I’ve seen you ruminating over the vows since I got down on my knee.”
You felt your cheeks flush, sitting next to Coriolanus on the plush couch. This short period of time is something you and Coriolanus said was a necessity in this special day, wanting time to share vows and have a moment alone before all of the excitement and partying at the reception.
“I’m not entirely too sure if it’s nerves or excitement.” You admitted, fiddling with a loose string on the couch. “I feel like my vows are going to be so terrible, worse than any paper I had in school.”
Coriolanus frowned, squeezing your hand to get your attention. “I’m sure they’re wonderful.”
You gnawed on your lower lip, an awful habit you had developed in your teen years. “Do- do you want me to go first?”
“It’s up to you, my love.” Coriolanus murmured, not wanting to pressure you into anything, something you were so grateful he did.
“I think, I think I want you to go first.”
Nodding, Coriolanus pulled out the crumpled paper, eliciting a quiet laugh from you.
“Don’t laugh, my love is written on this paper.”
You held your hands up, your heart already swelling with love at the sight of the blonde man, who seemed just like the lanky acne-faced classmate you met all those years ago.
Clearing his throat, Coriolanus looked down at the paper for a moment, before saying your name in the velvety-smooth voice he used only when he was with you.
“I feel like I can conquer the world when you’re next to me, the love and strength you show is one of my favorite things about you. From when we were assigned lab partners, to mentoring at the Hunger Games, to being granted internships at the Citadel, you’ve always been the light I’m drawn to as a moth is to a flame. Thank you for loving me in my weakest times, for loving me when I was undeserving, I know that I’m not the easiest person to love. Thank you for always helping me be the best version of myself, for being the sole voice of reason in the echo chamber that is my life.”
You sniffled, Coriolanus glancing up at you with a soft smile before continuing his vows.
“From when you first came into my life, and didn’t bat an eye at my upbringing, my home, my family, I knew you were the one who would become my other half. You always treat Grandma’am and Tigris with the respect and love they deserve, for that I owe you my life. I vow to always put you first, I vow to keep you out of harm’s way, and I vow to be the best husband I can be. I vow to be the best father I can be, when the times comes, and I know you’ll be the world’s most amazing mother. I vow to love you without any reservations, to always be the reason for your gorgeous smile. I love you, my love.”
You were full-on crying when Coriolanus ended his vows, and he quickly exchanged the paper for the cloth napkins on the table, picking up the one that already had mascara stains on it from earlier.
“I love you, too, Coryo.” You mumbled, scooting over on the couch to hug your husband. “I love you so much.”
You two had a small moment of peace, before you sniffled and sat up, preparing yourself for your own vows.
Coriolanus gave your knee an encouraging squeeze, knowing you weren’t a fan of speeches in general, whether they be in front of large audiences or family friends.
“Coryo,” you started, knowing he wasn’t the biggest fan of when you said his full name, but you knew he would never react harshly to you. “From the day we first met, I felt like a magnet drawn to you. You wanted nothing to do with me, but I was determined to break you, to see the real you under the tough, serious exterior you’ve built up. And I am so glad I did, so glad I got to meet the real you, the Coryo who will laugh at my corny jokes, who will never complain when I steal the comforter in bed, who will take a bullet for me. You understand me, see me, accept me in a way that no one has before, you are truly my best friend, and I feel like the world’s luckiest woman to be able to call you my husband. I vow to always be your confidante, your partner-in-crime. I vow to  have the patience that love demands, to always listen before reacting, to give you my whole heart. You are my person, my lover, my life, today, tomorrow, forever. I love you, Coriolanus Snow, you hold the key to my heart.”
Coriolanus’ eyes were glistening when you looked up from your paper, and you just barely saw his lip quivering.
“Do you mean that?” He asked softly, not wanting to break the serene moment.
Nodding, you gave him a watery smile, a fresh wave of tears spilling onto your cheeks. “Of course I mean it, you goon.”
Coriolanus pulled you up, wanting to properly hug you, inhaling the fresh vanilla and chai from your shampoo. “You are the reason my heart beats.”
“As are you, Coryo,” you replied, smiling as his lips met yours.
“Now, let’s give the Capitol the wedding reception of their lives.” You laced your fingers with Coriolanus’, his wedding band cool on your own fingers.
“After you, Mrs. Snow.” Coriolanus smiled, eyes glinting with hunger as he called you by your new surname for the first time.
-----
a/n: okay you're all so lucky this was requested i saved you form angst like coryo saved lucy gray
but for real there's some good angst coming in the new year
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ghost-proofbaby · 10 months
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SO SCARLET (IT WAS MAROON) - CHAPTER ONE: CLOSURE
“IT’S BEEN A LONG TIME, AND SEEING THE SHAPE OF YOUR NAME STILL SPELLS OUT PAIN.”
☆ pairings: rockstar!eddie munson x fem!reader
☆ warnings: strong language, angst, alcohol consumption, minors dni
☆ WC: 5.1K+
☆ A/N: this will make a whole lot more sense if you've already read the one shot that this entire series is based upon! and thank you to @fracturedarkness and @munson-blurbs for beta-reading <3
thank you to my love @hellfire--cult for the divider!
masterlist
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It had taken nearly two hours, and even as the aerial platform is finally lowered from scaling the side of the building, there are still remnants of the graffiti paint scattered across the crumbling brick. 
You’d watched the workers scrub at the rusted shades for ages, ignoring the new emails beginning to pile up in your inbox on the screen, only to be left completely dissatisfied. You hadn’t really thought the graffiti was ugly so to speak – it was just there. It was blatant and something that demanded to be seen, a stain on that stretch of wall that made up your desk’s entire viewpoint each and every day. And it wasn’t ugly, but it wasn’t pretty. 
You’d even been a little excited when you saw the cleaning crew. A little hopeful. 
But the hope had been wasted, as it always was, as you watch the crew give up the battle and the paint win the war. Go figure. Another day and another stain that can’t be erased. 
“You know, I’ve heard of dreadfully boring people watching paint dry, but never seen someone look so enticed by paint being removed.” 
You look up quickly from where your dead stare had zeroed in, a chipping splash of vibrant scarlet that hardly stood out against tired and faded red-turned-pink bricks, to face your coworker. 
“Ha-ha,” you deadpan, spinning your office chair so your entire body now faced her, “Have you ever considered a career change, Romina? Maybe you’re better off a comedian rather than an event planner.” 
Romina, your coworker, only smiles brightly at the monotone joke. She holds a mug of coffee in her hand as she rests her hip against the edge of your desk, lips pursed as she takes a slow sip from her steaming cup. The sharp, bitter scent of the coffee wafts across the space before she lowers the mug right onto your desk – completely disregarding the coaster available. 
Sure to leave behind a stain; a ring of light brown on your pristine desk. You can’t help but cringe. 
“Apparently they sent out an email about that new secretive project,” Romina continues on without addressing your sarcasm, “Said whoever’s got the account has been notified.”
“Awesome.”
“I didn’t get an email.”
“I’m sorry?”
Romina sighs, realizing you weren’t going to take the bait. “Have you received an email?”
You shrug in a silent succession of, probably not. 
Your pessimism keeps your hand from reaching out and wiggling your mouse as an attempt to wake your desktop computer back up. You highly doubt you were the one to be elected for this new project that had the entire office buzzing. You’d only been working here for a little over a year, hardly earning any attention with the small weddings and local business grand openings you had taken on during that time. 
And that was fine.
You were fine flying under the radar for the time being. It’s not that you weren’t good at your job — you were excellent at it, even — but whatever this top secret project was was the farthest thing from your expertise.
You didn’t do secretive projects. You did simple. You did small. The exact opposite of what you’d heard about this elusive opportunity. 
“Have you even checked?” Romina presses, leaning down and tapping your space bar herself, making the screen come to life before you could protest, “C’mon, babe! Aren’t you at least a little bit curious?” 
Another honest shrug. “Truthfully? Not at all.” 
She makes no move to grab her coffee cup as she pushes herself off your desk, standing over the screen now with intent and focus. All you can really think about is that damn faded ring that’s going to be left behind.
You really wish she would have used the coaster.
The login screen stops her in her mission, making her take a step back and wave you forward, pointing excitedly at your keyboard, “You know, I heard it might have something to do with a very popular band. One rumored to be dropping an album soon. Possibly the album release party. Doesn’t that sound dreamy?” 
Your stomach drops.
Romina is all wistful sighs and dreamy eyes as she says it, still pushing that keyboard closer to you as she looks out the window you had been before her arrival. It’s clear she’s looking right past that stained wall. She probably doesn’t even notice the evidence of graffiti that was left behind. The marks are lost on her eyes; but she hadn’t spent hours waiting for it to all be cleaned away, to be fair. No, it’s clear the only thing on her mind is this popular band.
And you know which band it is. It’s not just the prospect of a larger project that has kept you out of this rumor mill — it’s the prospect of the client.
Everyone knew you didn’t care for the band. Or at least, you said you didn’t care for the band.
Nearly a year ago, several coworkers had invited you to a sold out show. They had an extra ticket, and had so kindly extended it to you. A flag of friendship billowing in the wind, outstretched to you in such a welcoming manner. And you’d shot them down — you’d lied, and you’d said you had plans before you’d spent the entire night throwing your own personal pity party.
“I don’t think I’d be the first choice for an album release party, Ro,” you murmur as you finally tug your chair in closer to your desk. You ignore the knots forming in your stomach, that heavy weight that presses into your chest. There was no way you’d be assigned the project. You’d simply log in, show Romina, and then maybe she’d leave you alone, “I usually just take on weddings. That’s my forte. Not arranging open bars and booking rooftops for some shitty band.” 
Romina scoffs, “Some shitty band? I know you don’t like them, but Corroded Coffin is not just some shitty band.”
Corroded Coffin. The weight makes your ribs creak, makes your lungs ache. 
You swear she’ll notice the way you freeze in your typing. The mere mention of them, of him, curls around your body and easily triggers your fight or flight response. 
Well, fight or flight or freeze. A new option, a new and drifting cold, has made itself clear as ice keeps your knuckles from continuing to type in your password. 
It’s funny. You used to fight for them, then you’d flown as far away from him as your pathetic diner wages could get you. Clearly, only moving across a city you once thought to be so vast wasn’t far enough. You could move across oceans, and something in your gut tells you his ghost would only be a few steps behind. 
“You know, I still don’t get your issue with them, by the way. Are you just not big on rock music?” she asks, and you can imagine his offense and correction that it was metal, not just rock, “I get it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. I don’t know. Just seems a little personal, the way you avoid them like the plague.”
It is personal.
Your vendetta is so, so very personal when it comes to Corroded Coffin. 
When it comes to Eddie Munson.
His name echoing in your mind finally has your fingertips slamming keys again, suddenly eager to bring up your email and prove Romina wrong. To get her as far from your desk as possible and end this conversation before you can spiral.
“I’ve never been a fan of that type of music,” you lie through your teeth. You had been. You had been their goddamn number one fan once upon a time. 
Your work email can’t load fast enough when she continues on, “I’d argue they have at least one song for everyone. You just gotta give them a chance.” 
No, the voice in your head screams. I do not need to give them a chance. I gave him a chance, and he blew it. 
“I’m sure there is,” you grit out, those knots in your stomach wound so tightly they might just snap, “But not for me.” 
Never for me.
They don’t know. No one in your life now knew about your past, about your ex, about the truth between you and Corroded Coffin. 
They didn’t know that you’d been their first fan, standing in that stuffy garage at the Emerson’s residency through the scalding Hawkins’ summers. They didn’t know how you’d spent every Tuesday and Thursday night occupying a stool at the Hideout that had all but your name engraved into it. They didn’t know the way you’d packed up your entire life, the way you’d only moved to this cursed concrete jungle to see all of their wildest dreams come true. They were unaware that Corroded Coffin had nearly turned down the tour that triggered their breakout for you. All because their leading rockstar hadn’t wanted to leave you behind.
Funny how life works out.
Romina is unaware of your discomfort as she leans down over your shoulder to peer at the list of new emails you’d received this morning, “Oh, oh! That one! Click that one!” 
Her long, blood-red stiletto nail taps at the screen excitedly, pointing out an email from your boss with an eye catching subject line.
Meeting at Noon — New Project Assignment. 
“Holy shit!” Ro exclaims, getting ahead of herself before you’ve even clicked on the email. You can’t click on it. You’re petrified. “Oh, holy shit! You definitely got the project! Are you fucking kidding me?” 
For a moment, you’re silent, staring at the screen in buzzing shock. It rings in your ears and it blurs the edges of your vision, the weight of the possibility finally causing the first snap within your chest. 
No. No, no, no. 
You don’t want this project. Not the rumored client, and certainly not the attention that it has attracted from all your peers. No.
“We don’t even know if it’s going to be what everyone says it will be,” you choke out, white knuckling your mouse. Romina can’t see your face — she can’t see the year of practiced indifference crumbling so easily, “It- It probably won’t be Corroded Coffin, Ro. It can’t be. They wouldn’t assign me something so huge. Th-They probably just have another wedding for me. Maybe another bakery opening up in town — I think I heard about one on Third Street-“ 
Ro’s hands come down on your shoulders, giving what should be a reassuring squeeze, but it only smothers you during your breathless rant.
“Babe,” she emphasizes, “This is a good thing.” 
It’s not. It’s really, really not. 
But you don’t know if the project is what everyone has been murmuring about. You don’t know for sure that the email has anything to do with it. The contents of what your boss had written to you have little to no specifics; nothing more than a request to come to her office at noon to properly discuss the details of this assignment. So you convince yourself it’ll be fine, that it really is just about that bakery opening up on third street. You convince yourself to shake away any thoughts of chestnut curls and honey brown eyes. You convince yourself to untense your shoulders and smile up at your coworker, faking enough enthusiasm to satiate her until she’s walking away from your desk giddily, taking her coffee cup with her. 
Your eyes avert to the expected coffee mark that had formed a perfect ring on your stark white desk. 
Stained. What a pesky thing to become. 
“I’m not going out tonight,” you repeat yourself for the millionth time over the line, pinching the phone between your shoulder and ear as you opened your fridge to dig around for whatever leftovers you might be able to salvage into a dinner for the night, “I don’t feel well.” 
“But we need to hear about the new project!” Ro’s chirp comes over the line. You can hear the buzzing of a bar in the background. Glasses clinking, strangers chatting. Hell, you could probably pinpoint the song playing lowly if you focused hard enough.
You weren’t focusing on the call, though. It was the last thing you wanted to offer up your dwindling attention to, desperate to get off the line and resume your very exciting night of cold pasta with a side of whatever sitcom was running old episodes on the television. 
The phone nearly slips from your half assed attempt to keep it against your cheek as you sigh, “It went fine. I already told you guys it did. Nothing exciting, okay? It was the bakery on Third that’s opening up, just like I thought it would be.” 
A lie.
The meeting went anything but fine. Your boss, Lydia, has just been plain secretive. And normally, that wouldn’t bother you, but it meant your worst fears were coming true. 
The bakery on third wouldn’t have needed such secrecy, and they sure as Hell wouldn’t have insisted on you signing an NDA prior to even meeting and discussing the event you’d be planning. 
“It’s all just precautions,” Lydia had insisted as she slid that damn paperwork over to you, “Just to protect the client. They’re a bigger name than we’re used to dealing with. If you sign, we’ll have a proper meeting with them tomorrow and dig into all the nitty gritty.” 
“You phrase it like I have a choice,” you had muttered before picking up the pen.
You knew you didn’t. And Lydia’s smile had confirmed it. 
Romina continues on with more convincing, but you’ve stopped listening. There’s not a single thing she could really say now that your mind was made up — you were staying in tonight. 
“Ro,” you finally snatch the phone back up into your hand, straightening out as you pick out a random tupperware that you think holds chicken parm from that fancy lunch date you’d gone on over the weekend, “I’m not coming out. I’m sorry.” 
Complete silence on her end. You worry for a moment that you had been too harsh. 
“Okay,” she finally gives up.
“Okay?”
“Okay,” the word continues to echo back and forth between you two, “That’s fine. I’ll just have to bother you about it tomorrow. At work. Where you can’t use bullshit excuses to escape me.” 
You consider snapping back about how you absolutely still could, until you consider the fact that you have a real excuse, “Good luck with that. I have a very real meeting with… with a client.”  
You don’t even know the name of the client, technically. You can only guess. 
You still hope you’re wrong.
“Right,” she laughs over the line, “See you tomorrow, babe.” 
“See you tomorrow,” you repeat back, staring at your now closed fridge before you’re relieved by the sound of a dial tone, signaling that she’s finally hung up. 
What you should do now is plate the leftovers, arrange yourself on your sofa, and numb your mind with The Office reruns. What you should do is leave well enough alone and continue in your delusion. 
You don’t. 
It starts innocently; you do transfer the cold chicken parm onto a plate and you do curl up on your sofa before flicking on the television. You do set the channel to the reruns. You do – and you swear you do it all with the best intentions. 
But then your mind wanders. 
As you stare straight ahead at the television, you’re not processing a single image that flashes across the screen. Your thoughts are a bit preoccupied with different images, movies and snippets from a point in your life that now feels like a lifetime ago. Conspicuous dimples making an appearance from across the room at a joke you had made, unkempt curls flying recklessly in the driver’s seat beside you on late night drives with the windows down, wild eyes shining like sunlight through a whiskey bottle as he catches your gaze from a stage much smaller than what he must be used to now. 
Everything from before. Before the not-fight, before the fame, before the move. Images of when Eddie had been yours and only yours, not yet a precious gem to have to share with the world. 
“Are you busy tonight?” 
Your locker had been slammed shut by a hand that didn’t belong to you, knuckles adorned with familiar rings and distinct callouses along the fingertips. 
“Hello to you, too, Eddie,” you smiled as you clutched one of the unnecessarily heavy textbooks to your chest, turning to face the boy who stood impatiently at your side. He was all jitters, rocking on his heels and nearly incapable of standing still as his body buzzed with excitement.
It rolled off him in waves, contagious as he leaned into you, “Yes, yes. Hello, sweetheart. How was your day?” you opened your mouth to answer him, but Eddie comically steamrolled right on, hands waving erratically, “Good? Good! Excellent! Now, are you busy tonight?”
“I was planning to study for O’Donnel’s test-“
“So you don’t have plans!” he exclaimed, throwing an arm around your shoulders as one of the annoying warning bells chimed. He may have been in an interruptive mood, but he knew you hated being late to class — less about being anal about punctuality, and more about the stares you’d practically burn under from the attention of other students when you’d barge in on the teacher mid-sentence, “Perfect. Absolutely perfect. In that case, I have fantastic news!” 
You allowed him to guide you amongst the bustling student bodies, only gaining a few stares from fellow peers, “You do, do you?” 
He nodded before he reached out and snatched that heavy textbook out of your arms, “Here, let me carry that for you, darling.” 
“Darling?” your nose scrunched, “Oh, no. You’re trying to sweeten me up. What did you do?” 
“Nothing!”
Liar. The crack in his voice would have given him away if his hyperactive energy hadn’t already done so.
“Oh, really? Then what’s your fantastic news, rockstar?” 
His grin that broke at your nickname for him could have destroyed the Earth you walked on just as easily as it could have mended it. Something groundbreaking, something to churn the dirt and raise the dead. Something made of pure sunshine and static happiness. But the only thing that cracked was your chest as it tried to contain the residual joy it felt for him in that moment. 
“Well…” he trailed off, leaving just enough room for a suspenseful pause that could have suffocated the room without that damn grin on his face, “Let’s just say you’re looking at the frontman of the Hideout’s newest Thursday night entertainment.” 
You took a moment to catch on, Eddie keeping you pressed closely to his side as the two of you stopped outside of your next class. 
“Thursday nights?” you questioned, brain working overtime to piece together what he’d just said, “Wait, I thought you guys only played Tuesda-“
When you had processed what he had meant, all that animated elation that had been consuming him became shared. Every jitter in his bones became your own, your own lips speedily spreading into a proud smile to challenge his own.
“Oh, holy shit,” you gasped, “You guys got the gig.”
One more bounce of his heels, curls quivering with the movement as his arms fell from you and the two of you faced one another.
“We got the gig.”
“You got the gig!” 
People had been staring more obviously at the sudden rise in volume from you, but you hadn’t cared. Because in that moment, all you focused on was the eager boy in front of you, and the way your broken chest mended from the same grin that had burst it wide open, only for it to swell with inexplicable pride.
“We got the fuckin’ gig!” he shouted right back, laughter slipping from between his lips that started to echo your own. 
You were the one bouncing then, hands instinctively reaching out to press on his shoulders in gentle slapping motions, unable to contain or conventionally express this pounding excitement. 
“You got the fuckin’ gig!” you were just parroting each other now, but you were just as delirious as he was as that final bell signaling you were late rang out. That certain embarrassment you were sure to have to face had become a distant memory.
Eddie had wanted this for a while. He’d been bugging the owner of the bar on the edge of town about Corroded Coffin earning a second night of residency for months, only taking the repeated rejections as encouragement to ramp up his convincing charm. You’d seriously doubted it would work, but had never voiced the concern aloud to Eddie. You’d always figured that the worst that could have happened would be another no, fuck off, kid. But the best that could have happened had been this — he would be told yes and secure his band two weekly performances at the Hideout rather than just the single one they played before. 
You didn’t know it then, but it was the first step down the path that would lead to inevitable heartbreak. 
“I haven’t even told the guys yet,” Eddie admitted once the two of you calmed down to the best of your abilities, “I… Uh, I wanted to tell them after school today. Was wondering if you might, I don’t know, maybe- do you wanna be there when I do?” 
And that made sense. Eddie inviting you made sense when you attended every single band practice in Gareth’s garage as religiously as he did. When you knew every word to their whole three original songs even better than him at times. 
He wanted you there. You were important to him, to the band, and he wanted you there. 
“I- Is that even a question?” you stared at him in disbelief, “Of course I wanna be there, you fuckin’ idiot. I can’t believe you told me before you told them, honestly.” 
His demeanor softened, the ghost of his exuberance still stubbornly lingering. But your eyes were on him, glowing with such high regard that it was impossible to not let it creep beneath his skin and trigger a blush across the bridge of his nose. All that love, all that pride. So genuine it could have made him cry. 
“Of course I told you first,” he whispered in a finally empty hallway, “You’re always the first person I tell any good news to, sweetheart.” 
When had you stopped being the first person he shared his forthcomings with? 
Probably the day you had decided to leave him, leave the entire life you two had built together, under the guise of best intentions. 
The TV continues to play as you stare at the wall, mind and heart alike locked up with nostalgia. The plate of leftovers has long since been sat down on the coffee table. 
You hadn’t let yourself reminisce like this since the very first night you had spent in your apartment. That first night, you’d allowed yourself to wallow. You had sat on this very same sofa, the entire apartment pitch black as you weren’t brave enough to turn on a single light and face yourself, and told yourself that any and all tears or regrets had to be purged that night. A funeral for all that you had lost, a single night to mourn all that you had left behind. 
Clearly, one night was never enough to let go of years of memories – of love. 
You don’t shut off the TV as you impulsively grab your phone, not thinking the action through before you do the one thing you had forbidden yourself from over the last few years; you’re going to Google search Eddie Munson. You’d created the rule as a make-believe step in the right direction. You told yourself if you didn’t google him, if you didn’t track down his every move after you’d left behind the damage done, then you could move on easier. 
From the first headline, you realize that it might have never been about moving on. 
FINAL NAIL IN THE COFFIN? HAS EDDIE MUNSON, LEAD SINGER OF CORRODED COFFIN, FINALLY GONE TOO FAR?
EDDIE MUNSON — ARRESTED AGAIN?
HOTEL COMES FORWARD ABOUT DAMAGES DONE BY ROWDY ROCKSTAR EDDIE MUNSON
HOW TO BURY A CAREER: A DETAILED TIMELINE OF CORRODED COFFIN’S EDDIE MUNSON’S DOWNFALL
“EDDIE MUNSON GAVE ME A CONCUSSION” - VICTIMS OF THE ROCKSTAR’S CLUB TANTRUM COME FORWARD.
Each headline sends your head reeling, eyes widening impossibly without even clicking on the stories. 
The boy you had known wouldn’t have done half of the things these accusations stated. Violence, trashing hotel rooms, public temper tantrums taken too far — it doesn’t feel as though you’re reading about someone you once knew, someone you once loved. The man in these paparazzi photos is a stranger, completely unrecognizable with his red eyes and middle fingers held high. 
A particular photo catches your attention. He’s standing outside what you assume is a club, in handcuffs. His hands are locked behind his back, an officer not far behind and his face bathed in glows of blue and red lights flashing from a car half blocking the camera’s view of him, and he’s grinning with dead eyes squinted to the sky. It almost looks as if he’s midlaugh — as if the entire scene was funny to him.
The one time he’d nearly been caught while pedaling drugs for Reefer Rick back home in Hawkins when you’d still known him, he had nearly burst into tears. Had panicked as he scrambled to shove everything, even just the weed, into every possible hiding place within his van. He hadn’t laughed in the officer’s face; he had been petrified, face transforming to that of a terrified little boy as you had told him to calm down and play it cool. 
You should stop scrolling. But you can’t.
Another photo, one that makes your chest echo with another hollow pang. It was clearly taken without him realizing it, the quality atrocious as the camera had attempted to focus in on him through a balcony sliding door of what must be a hotel. But despite the terrible blur, you can clearly pick out the details that were meant to be exposed. 
A speckle of white coating the ring of his nostril. Made even more obvious by that midday sun shining in on him. 
It was clearly the middle of the afternoon, and Eddie had clearly been caught snorting cocaine.
It’s a bit much. You haven’t even scrolled far enough to catch sight of all the pap photos of him with different women, or the photos of him clearly inebriated at major events that had been meant to celebrate him and the band’s success. You lock your phone, you set it down on the table with the screen facing down. You hardly recognize him. 
The reality is you had never googled Eddie for the same reason most won’t look at the corpse of loved one’s at open casket funerals – you wanted to remember him when things had been good. You had wanted to convince yourself that you still knew him, some version of him, and that he hadn’t become a total stranger.
But, really, you’d known the moment you had walked out of that once shared apartment that you had lost the privilege of knowing him. Of loving him. The moment he had stopped telling you that he loved you, you had known something between the two of you had died. Losing Eddie hadn’t been a sudden thing — it had been a long, painful, torturous process. When all that love and all that promise had died, it hadn’t gone down without a fight. He had smothered it, but you had provided the extinguisher. You had pushed him to chase after his dreams, and you should have never been surprised when he did exactly that.
You should have never been surprised that one day, the space you’d claimed residency in in Eddie’s heart would become nothing more than an annoying prick to him. A thorn in his side, sharp and threatening all that he had worked so hard to achieve.
So you’d left. You’d left, told yourself it was for the best, and exited with more love for the memory of a man than the tangible person on the other end of that terribly lonely dial tone – on the rare occasions he did call. 
You didn’t know him. It’s a truth you should have long since swallowed, but hadn’t. Not yet. Not in the last two years.
Your appetite is gone as you stand from the couch and grab the leftovers, only pausing on your way to the kitchen to scrape the waste off into the trash can. What a waste. As you put away the plate into the sink, not bothering to wash or even rinse away the crumbs, you immediately grab one of your few wine glasses and set it on the counter. Drinking wasn’t the wisest idea, but your body has begun to move on autopilot. And it seems convinced that feeling the buzz from alcohol would be better than the feeling of nothing at all. 
You didn’t know him anymore. And the space you’d still let him occupy in your memories, whether you’d wanted to admit it or not, was now hollow.
You turn your back on the glass, still numb and still reeling as you open the fridge and pull out a half empty bottle of merlot, cork half peeking out the top of the bottle. You can see that stained bottom half, almost half hidden in a weak attempt to preserve the wine inside. Maroon. Deep, deep maroon bleeds up and feathers at the edges of that cork as you pull it out fairly aggressively, carelessly tossing it onto the white countertop and not watching it bounce as you pour yourself a drink. 
In your hollow staring off into the distance, you don’t realize you’ve missed the glass in your pouring until the chilled liquid splashes at your knuckles – until it’s too late. You panic, grabbing at paper towels and rinsing off your hand in the same breath, but it’s clear that it’s a useless battle in cleaning up the mess you’ve made. 
The damage is already done. As you soak up the wine and swipe away, a pink-tinged blotch is still left behind. 
Stained. What a pesky thing to become.
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