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hellishjoel · 3 months

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uneasy hearts weigh the most

7.3k / pairing: linecook!frankie x waitress f!reader Series Masterlist l Previous Chapter | Main Masterlist | Notifications Blog

summary: Benny hosts the party of the year where broken pieces of Frankie's past are unearthed. warnings/information: MA 18+ (minors DNI), smoking and drinking alcohol, reader is described to have hair (not descriptive of what color/length/etc.), house party, explicit smut, oral (f!receiving), swearing, pet names, allusions to bad parenting/parental abuse, vivid writing of a mental disorder [capgras syndrome] and an accompanied nightmare, descriptions of violence against a parental figure, descriptions of a parent abusing drugs and alcohol (please heed these warnings and do not read if you are concerned these may be triggers) A/N: I know this has been in the works for a while and I thank you for your patience! special shoutout to @thetriumphantpanda who beta'd this for me!! I owe her a 100 grand bar now! listen to the song uneasy hearts weigh the most and I'll kiss you on the forehead

Yeah baby, keep fuckin’ my fingers. “Do it again,” he mutters. You moan louder as you gyrate your hips once more against his fingers, grinding your core against his knuckles. “Fuck, baby,” he whispers with adoration.

The last time Francisco Morales saw his father was when he was punching his face in.

It was a blur.

Blood splattered across his face, neck, and shirt. His fist was crimson, his knuckles ached. But he couldn’t will himself to stop.

Frankie would draw his arm back, using as much force as his little twelve-year-old body could muster, and plunge his whole body forward as he landed another hit. He couldn’t stop himself from crying, even when he was at his angriest.

Why was he crying? Why couldn’t he stop crying?

Frankie’s dad wasn't exactly father-of-the-year material. More like a drill sergeant with a drinking problem. When things got tough, he’d ditch his family for drugs and booze and only ever circle back when money turned to dust.

His mom was falling apart before his eyes. His younger siblings were fearful because their mom, who was supposed to take care of them, couldn’t, and their father, who was supposed to love them, hurt them.

Frankie was the oldest; he felt an obligation to protect everyone. But what can you do when you’re not even five feet tall?

If his father hadn’t been so strung out that night, Frankie wouldn’t have been able to tackle him to the ground like he did. He wouldn’t have been able to pin him down by fisting his ratty t-shirt and hit him like he did. As hard as he did. As many times as he did.

Then, his father lay lifeless. Frankie blinked away his tears and let out a shaky sob. He got scared because he thought he had killed him. After all those puny hits, he laid limp. He wasn’t smart enough to know that he had just passed out from the drugs in his system.

Frankie was so torn because how can you hate someone you’re supposed to love? How could his father leave the family he was supposed to be the foundation of?

The Texas Department of Family and Protective Services intervened not long after. And he doesn’t like to think about it, any of it.

Not growing up, not his family, nothing.

But now he’s staring at a letter from his father. It’s his handwriting; the slant in the L’s, and the hook of his Y’s. Slightly smeary, written in pencil with eraser shavings damn near burned into the lined paper. He wrote this letter over and over again, trying to author the right words, to say the right things.

Frankie’s heart stops, and all the memories rush back in a flood. It hits him like a fucking hurricane.

Tommy’s Diner settles after its Friday night dinner rush. The hour before closing was always erratic, putting together to-go orders and ushering stacks of dirty plates from the tables to the back sink.

Your shoulder blades collide with the swing door connecting the kitchen to the rest of the diner, using the force of your body to swing it open as you balance the ceramic plates in your arms.

“Sorry, Lou. Just a few more.” You mutter tiredly as you set the stack beside the teenage dishwasher, hearing him sigh loudly before putting his earbuds back in place. He wasn’t one for many words. The most you knew about him was he listened to cringey, whiney rappers.

You close your eyes for just a moment and lean back into the counter, craning your back and feeling each vertebrae realigning with anguish. Tina called in sick and you offered to work a double to pick up some extra hours this week. Besides, on days you didn’t work with Frankie, you were more… productive.

The hum of customers gradually subsides, their chatter tapering off until the bell above the door chimes, signaling their exit. It’s nicer like this, when you don’t have to be the charming server who keeps up with all of their conversations from table to table. Especially after pulling a double, and your brain feels like it might melt.

The staff worked diligently throughout the rest of the night, tidying up the tables and floors, not letting up until the countertops gleamed, the coffee pots shined, and the strong smell of cleaning fumes mingled in the air.

You grow a fond smile thinking about spending the summer with Frankie. He adores being outside far more than you do. It’s impossible not to imagine how stupidly sexy he would look with his skin glowing a golden tan and a pair of sunglasses sitting lazily on the bridge of his aquiline nose. Loose, flowy shirt and a pair of shorts. Curls lost to the wind.

He talks about taking you on nature walks through his favorite trails and driving you further out of your nowhere town so you can stargaze at midnight. Or maybe you could hit the beach and spend your days under the sun drinking margaritas and Coronas.

Summer could change things for you.

Admittedly, you’ve been fantasizing—romanticizing. You think about him even when he’s not around. You miss the home you’ve made on the open side of his bed, where you’d curl around his orange tabby cat with his arms circled around your waist.

Worst of all were the nights you were back at your place, where there was no one around to cook you dinner or dish out goofy conversations. Having to snake touches over your own body, over the curve of your belly, and sinking your fingers past your panties where the only remnants of Frankie is you muttering his name at the peak of your orgasm, wishing it was him showering you with his affections rather than your fingers or toys.

God forbid you enjoy solo sessions anymore because Frankie has totally ruined that for you. It wasn’t as fun knowing you had a brown-eyed, curly-headed man across town who would beg on his knees given the chance.

Anyway. Enough of that.

You count the till’s cash, level out the profit, and put it all in a small bank bag before your manager, Carla, tucks it inside the safe. The metal keys on your carabiner clip jingle upon flipping the lock, the cool night air tickling your skin as late spring shows its face under the velvet night sky.

A truck rumbles up the drive, and you know the signature death rattle all too well.

“What are you doin’ here?” You lean against the driver's side of Frankie’s truck once he pulls up to you, your sneakers shifting gravel, his mouth tilted in a smirk. He leans past the truck’s frame and kisses you, cradling the back of your head to keep you against him.

“Mmm,” he hums against your mouth, tasting cherry chapstick as he glides his tongue across your lower lip. “Get in. Benny’s having a house party.”

Eyes narrowing, you run your thumb up his beard scruff and gently scrape your nails down the dark hair. “I need to go home to change. Plus, I need a shower. I smell like grease, and I have grime under my nails.”

“Fine, I’ll take you back to your place. I can wait.”

A breath stalls in your lungs, eyes unblinking as you stare at him for a moment.

Frankie has yet to visit your place — your dungeon, a basement-level one-bedroom apartment made up by a measly excuse of a kitchen and a tiny living space. You’re by no means embarrassed of its appearance. You’re rather clean, and you’ve made it as homely as you possibly can with bright-colored rugs and wall art. But it was sort of your final boundary. He was literally about to pass the threshold. Master the final boss.

He’s let you have your space and never pushed you. The least you could do was say,

“Okay.”

A contagious grin catches his lips, pulling you closer by the hand still cradling the back of your head, and he takes you in for a few more slow kisses.

A car’s honk and bright lights jolt your heart, and your eyes squint until the flashers go down on the car Frankie has parked in.

“Can you two lovebirds hurry it up?” your manager, Carla, yells from the driver's seat of her rust-red 2006 Honda Civic. “You’re blockin’ me in, Francisco.”

You purse your lips with embarrassment, heat flushing the back of your neck. Carla was going to find out one way or another that you two have been sneaking around. She knows everything about everyone.

“Hey, sorry, mama,” Frankie nods as she shakes her head slowly, mouth tainted with a smirk.

“I’ll follow you back to your place,” Frankie whispers and you nod shyly, wrapping around the front of his truck and letting him tail you home.

Frankie takes two steps at a time down to your basement-level apartment. His boots thump against the cold stone, and you push the front door open with the force of your shoulder.

His eyes drag along the different pieces of the apartment that make you, you. Soft blankets that drape along the back of a loveseat accompanied by little, fluffy pillows, different pairs of sneakers sit stacked beside the front door, and a small table for two holds random clutter in the criminally tiny dining room.

He follows your lead and kicks off his shoes, watching you unfold into your natural routine: you drop your bag on the kitchen counter, and your fingers are already tugging a black hair tie loose. He trails you down a narrow hallway, squinting as you turn on the harsh overhead lighting to the bathroom.

Out of your clothes without a second thought, Frankie can’t help but laugh at the way you fling your bra past his head, tunneling down the hallway and landing in what he presumes is your bedroom. The shower curtain is something abstract, most likely purchased from the Target down the road.

“I’ll be quick if you wanna wait outside,” you offer, body shielded by the curtain.

Frankie shrugs, eyes glancing to the toilet opposite the shower.

“I don’t mind waitin’. Wanna tell me about your day?” Frankie asks, taking a seat on the closed toilet lid. He sees you fight away a timid smile and slink behind the shower curtain. The beads of water hit your body and change the tune inside the bathroom. He can tell each time you shift and twirl. It takes you a moment to become acquainted, but you retell the details of your day in a sweet lull.

“I, uh, I usually listen to music when I shower,” you admit between the spray.

“Oh, so you want me to start singin’?” Frankie asks with a smirk, to which you quickly shout no!

It doesn’t stop him from breaking into a pitchy rendition of a song by the Bee Gees.

After a fit of laughter, you both settle down, and Frankie is back to smiling at the sheer, cheaply-made shower curtain. He can see your silhouette dance under the shower head, gathering your hair and rising out the suds, grabbing a loofa to scrub away the worst of the grime from Tommy’s Diner.

Holy shit, Frankie thinks, you smell like heaven. Oh my god, he likes you. It hits him like a bullet to the chest, the impact rippling through his veins and making his heart beat so loud that it rings in his ears. It’s a silent reminder that feeling things are beautiful when they are about you.

The bathroom grows steamy, fogging up the glass of your medicine cabinet mirror. His skin grows clammy and his knee starts to jump in anticipation.

“I’m almost done!” Your voice sing-songs as he slips off his jacket, his eyes still cast upon your body beyond the curtain. He’s in love with the way your body moves, fluidly and without intention. You’re just taking a shower and he thinks you’re beautiful.

Just as you’re about to flip the water off, the curtain rings screech to open.

“Frankie,” you breathe, eyes falling to his exposed tan skin. No other words come to mind other than another breath of his name.

His lips attach to your neck, slow but faltering. Like he’s searching for the one spot to push you over the edge and join him in oblivion.

The tension in the air rises as the water cascades down his back and soaks his dark curls. His frame, large and broad, protects yours as his arms circle your waist like wild vines.

Your eyes slowly fall closed, lips parted as your head eventually tilts back and rests against the shower wall. It exposes more area for Frankie to explore, his palms kneading at your lower back, arching your torso into his own.

His teeth skim along your skin, the steam already forcing your flesh to glow and rise under the growing pressure of his hunger for you.

He begins to navigate a new path, his lips finding purchase above your breastbone. Your fingers start at his biceps, feeling the strong muscles protruding underneath. He’s so unbearably handsome, and you can’t believe his body is fitting in the small shower stall with you.

Finally, a heavy breath slips, something that resembles a moan. After that, he’s starving for you.

The teeth that were once just grazing your skin, now nipping and sucking. His hands fall lower down the curve of your ass, squeezing and lifting as you gasp into his ear. You're dripping with arousal that sits achingly between your legs.

You place a slender hand over his more muscular one, guiding it between your legs and gently cupping your mound.

“Please,” you whisper, like the only thing Frankie needs to hear.

He paints your mouth in a wet kiss, drowning any better judgment that may have resided.

Intertwining your feelings together, the steam buckles heatedly in the small space.

His fingers curl in your hold, swiping between your folds and feeling you. There’s a whimper let out against his ear, nipping at his lower lip once his fingers push past your threshold.

And he groans.

You’re so fucking tight, so fucking perfect for him. His forehead lays against your temple, your nose brushing against the coarse hair of his beard. Frankie sinks his fingers into you, knuckle-deep, and leaves you squirming under his hold. His fingers are so thick, it’s a bittersweet symphony the way your moans mingle in the air.

He’s got you cornered in the shower, body pressed against the hot mold. Two fingers move fluidly inside, stretching your core and stoking the burning embers that rest low in your stomach.

“There,” you breathe, gasping as he adds more pressure to one spot that makes your legs nearly collapse out from under you. He still has you locked with an arm around your waist, holding what’s left of your presence.

He’s skilled, his thumb finding your clit, and you want to scream at the way his fingers are long enough to fuck into you and massage your aching pearl at the same time. He’s the only one who can make you unfold like this.

“Christ,” he mutters into your ear as he feels your walls desperately clench around him. “You can take another, can’t ya, baby?”

His brown eyes melt you, waiting for your confirmation. You sigh weakly but ultimately nod. It’s all you can think about.

He groans as he works a third into your entrance, and it burns, the way your pleasure mixes with the pain.

You wrap an arm weakly around the tops of his shoulders, nails etching into his skin in a last-ditch effort to keep yourself able in his arms.

“Fuck, Frankie,” you whine, long and bratty almost. You’re so close already, he knows just how to get you to the brink.

You tingle at his touch, your muscles going numb as he fucks his fingers at a now unrelenting pace within your tight core.

He works you to the edge, feeling the tick of the timebomb slowly begin to set off inside you.

With all the energy you have left, you swing your leg up and hitch it on his hip.

He looks bewildered for a moment, shocked eyes meeting your own as you rest your shoulder blades back against the shower wall with enough room to move your hips. You begin rolling your core down onto his fingers and he makes a noise resembling praise.

Yeah baby, keep fuckin’ my fingers.

“Do it again,” he mutters.

You moan louder as you gyrate your hips once more against his fingers, grinding your core against his knuckles.

“Fuck, baby,” he whispers with adoration.

He watches your body with fascination, Frankie’s eyes obsessively taking in your movements. His lips are quick to bow down at your alter, lips latching onto your exposed nipples that perk up in his mouth with all the attention. It makes a tingle shoot down your spine, only making your hips move faster as you fuck yourself down onto his fingers.

Frankie kisses down your body until he’s sunk down onto his knees, damn near growling as your hips grind against his awaiting mouth. He latches his lips to your clit and harshly suckles, causing a high-pitched whimper to leave your mouth.

You’re so close and he knows it, he can feel your thighs trembling under the heat of his palms. It’s the only thing holding you up at this point. Weaving your fingers into his watered-down locks, you grip them tight and keep Frankie close.

He chuckles lowly, eyes flicking up to yours and seeing the desperate look cast over them.

“You wanna come?”

Like he even has to ask.

“Please,” you say, desperation leaking from your voice as you feverishly nod.

Frankie tsks playfully, humming lowly against your clit. “Love when you beg for it, sweetheart.”

Frankie circles your clit with the tip of his tongue, making out with your pussy and lapping away at your sweet juices. He hooks one of your legs over his shoulder, allowing his fingers to move with more precision.

You can feel your muscles contort as he starts to massage your spongy sweet spot. It’s enough to make your jaw drop and heat to spill down your spine. Your fingers clench his curls tighter between your fingers, holding him against you as your orgasm finally breaches.

The leg hooked onto his shoulder shakes with each uneasy wave of your orgasm. The shower’s heat leaves you breathless, crying out in pleasure as your body shudders.

Frankie smirks as he slowly loosens his fingers from your entrance, taking each finger into his mouth, one, two, three. His tongue swirls around each digit before he inches your leg back to down to the shower floor, planting your feet on solid ground before he stands and twists the shower’s handle.

It only takes a few seconds, but the high of your orgasm and the heat of the shower makes you lose your sense of self. Your legs tremble and your hands feverishly grip Frankie.

The ringing in your ears slowly fades away as he snaps the handle on the shower, letting the room calm into gentle silence.

“Hey, hey,” he whispers as he wraps you in his arms, feeling weightless as he talks you down. “Wow,” he breathes, “never had a woman faint from how good-”

“Stop,” you laugh breathlessly, peaking your eyes open, and seeing the glittering haze of the handsome man in front of you. Water droplets run down his face, cascading down his neck and gliding horizontally across his shoulders.

“I like hearing you talk about your day.”

Innocent eyes meet his own and you nod. “Okay.”

Frankie wasn’t joking when he said his friends threw a house party. They threw a goddamn party.

After winding down a long gravel road about thirty minutes out of town, you arrive at a two-story classic country home. It’s surrounded by acres and acres of green grass and tall trees in the distance. The most action this house has seen in years is most likely deer or coyotes.

And now it was seeing the house party of a lifetime.

“Frankie,” you breathe out in disbelief once he parks his truck in the grass and kills the engine. “Whose house is this?”

His mouth tilts in a smirk as he peers forward up at the house, not sure if he’s staring at the long string lights that reach from one side of the home to the other, or the drunkards climbing onto the roof.

“Will and Benny’s, after their grandfather passed away. Pretty sweet, huh?”

The crunch of a beer can under your shoe is the first thing you hear, other guests quick to park their vehicles and rush inside with cases of beer on their shoulders. The echoes of the partying inside could be heard from the dirt driveway, Frankie wrapping his arm around your shoulder as he escorts you in.

A chorus of people bump against your shoulder as they step outside, laughing hard and obviously tipsy.

“What is this place?” You mutter in slight amazement and curiosity.

“Come on, I’ll give you the tour,” Frankie whispers against your ear, making a tingle slip down your spine as you playfully nudge your elbow somewhere between his ribs.

He walks you through the living room, easily the most filled room in the house by the looks of it. All the furniture has been pushed aside and a band resides at the forefront of all the chaos. The lead singer and guitarists stand on the sitting area of the recessed mantle. The cheering rings in your ears and the bass thumps through the floorboards, electrifying everyone’s bodies to move and dance.

Off the dining room is the kitchen. You can’t really tell how modern or outdated it is due to the sea of people making drinks. Frankie reaches through the hoard and retrieves two beers, popping the top off yours and slipping the cold bottle into your hand.

“Thanks,” you mutter as you clink your bottle with his.

Aside from the noisiest parts of the house, there were chill places where people were talking and sharing ideas or the latest things that were happening in their lives. You try not to laugh as a woman swaying in a hammock accidentally falls out, landing with a thud. Thankfully, her friends in the bean bags below caught her with bellows of glee.

“Best part,” Frankie whispers to you as he opens the door to a nearly pitch-black room, only lit by two lanterns at the very front of the mostly wood study. People are sat on the floor, whispering and shushing each other as you and Frankie fill in quietly towards the back.

“And now, may I present to you, Santi, the Significant!”

Your eyebrows furrow as Santiago steps in front of a white flashlight’s spot, bowing ridiculously as everyone laughs.

“Santi the Significant?” You whisper as Frankie chuckles quietly and nuzzles his nose against your temple.

“He thought Magnificent wasn’t spectacular enough, or kitschy.”

“He performs real magic? Isn’t that kind of…” At the risk of offending one of his best friends, he fills in the blank for you.

“Nerdy?” Frankie snidely smirks and shakes his head. “Works better than you think. Watch.”

You're skeptical about the magic act, but you can't help but be impressed as the confident Santi pulls roses from his jacket sleeve and hands them to the most eligible ladies in the audience, eliciting gasps and enthusiastic applause.

“No way,” you shake your head as Santi continues a few close-up magic tricks, enough to keep his drunk audience convinced. After a few more card tricks and cheesy jokes, the crowd applauds and whistles.

“That’s all from me today, folks. If you want my number, please see me after the show.”

“Dear god,” you mutter, hiding your face in Frankie’s shoulder. “How is this working?” You ask as a group of young women circle Santi with praise and lusty eyes. “Should I go ask for his number? I was pretty wooed back there.”

Frankie tuts as he ushers you out of the study. “Absolutely not.”

The entire night thrives on high energy with a constant flow of surprises. The decor of pink plastic flamingos and a surprise disco ball is making this everyone’s night one to remember - as long as the guests don’t drink too much.

You’ve let Frankie go to mingle with his friends while you keep an intoxicated Benny at bay sitting at the top step of the staircase that looks over most of the party.

“Quite the bash, Benny.”

“Thank you, m’lady. You’re enjoying yourself?” He slurs and sways, even while sitting.

“I didn’t even know this many people our age live around here.” Your head rests against old yellow wallpaper, the design mostly faded and lightly curling at the floorboards. Your finger plays with the exposed edge, fighting the urge to tear it off or keep peeling it.

He hums and throws an empty beer bottle behind his shoulder, hearing it clatter against the wall. “The best distraction for someone like me is people. I like people. And everyone needs a good distraction.”

You narrow your eyes on Benny curiously, the disco ball flashing along the bedazzled beads hanging around his neck. “Distraction from what?”

Benny seems like a very happy person, but it’s moments like these that reveal one's vulnerability. He slowly shakes his head with a very telling smile, gently squeezing your shoulder as he sighs. “It’s okay,” he slurs, “it’s why our friend group gets along so well because we all need distractions.”

He speaks so knowingly, almost like a prophet speaking in riddles, so you decide to amuse him.

“Yeah? What about Frankie? He needs distractions too?”

Benny hums and points at Frankie down below. You peer through the wooden balusters, seeing Frankie mix and mingle with a drink in one hand and a lit joint in the other. He takes a hit and sputters up a cough as he laughs at what his group is saying, making you smile.

“Frankie… is a very special case. He’s uh,” Benny’s eyes droop, his head resting on your shoulder as he closes his eyes and relaxes with your presence.

“He’s what?” You whisper, reassuringly running a hand up and down his back.

Benny lets out another sigh, breath reeking of alcohol. “You’re a good distraction for him. ‘Nd I don’t mean a distraction like a bad thing. You’re… You’re very good for him. He’s had a hard life and y’know, I’m sure he’s told you. But now he’s happy again.”

Your heart hammers in your chest and you’re afraid Benny might be able to hear it. The large grandfather clock standing by the front door chimes, and you can’t read the time from this distance, but by the multiple rings, it must be midnight.

And before you can stop him from spilling, Benny shares maybe more than he should.

“Y’know with his dad. His whole family, really. His mom has capybara… no, not capybara syndrome.” Benny pauses to laugh before finishing.

“Capgras syndrome? She just wasn’t all there when he was growing up and she didn’t get the help she needed until later in… in life. Frankie was just a kid and all of his siblings were, y’know, younger than him. Plus his dad wasn’t around to help her, drunk asshole that he was probably wouldn’t have been much help anyway.”

You stare straight ahead, watching your happy goofball down below with a new view.

“So his mom was there but not really there. He hasn’t seen his dad in years, but now, he’s back around and sent Frankie a letter or some shit. I don’t know what about. But everything has just sort of sucked for him for a long time.” Benny scoffs and lays his forehead against your shoulder, muttering now. “Especially that damn letter. ‘Nd his damn dad. But you know about all of this already.”

No, you didn’t. You’re stunned into a soft silence, the hand on Benny’s back slowly falling.

“This party and you, good distractions. But Frankie told me he started having nightmares again.”

Suddenly very awake and alert, Benny sits up straight and looks you in your eyes. “Don’t let him drink too much tonight, okay? He’ll start spiraling if he thinks about this shit too much. Keep… keep being a good distraction.”

Benny pauses and clenches his stomach, his face turning a little pale. “Fuck,” He mutters as he quickly shifts onto his knees and crawls up the opposite side of the staircase, pushing himself to his feet and rushing towards the bathroom.

The buzz of the party slowly fades, like the sound of snow falling outside. It’s a silence that isn’t silence at all. Everything falls into slow motion, the confetti falling and the disco ball gleaming all halting mid-air.

You weren’t supposed to know this much, or Frankie would have told you if he wanted to. But now as you stare down the staircase to Frankie, seeing him throw his head back in laughter, it’s hard to imagine someone like him had a past like that.

Benny was drunk. Maybe he was mixing Frankie up with someone else? You didn’t know why, but instead of your usual instinct to flee, one of protection starts to come over you.

“Hey,” Frankie breathes out with a big smile, his eyes glazed over and a little red from smoking as he watches you step down the staircase.

“Hey,” you say with little to no masking of your emotions.

He tilts his head adorably and rests his hand on your hip, pulling you in closer to him. “You alright?”

After nodding quickly with wide eyes, you know it’s more important for Frankie to believe nothing is wrong.

“Yeah! Yeah, all good. Do you think we could head out soon? I’m getting pretty tired, worked a double and all.”

Frankie smiles and pulls his truck keys out of his dark blue jeans, doing the responsible thing and putting them into your very capable hands. “If you’re tired, I’m tired. Let’s go.”

He’s cross-faded for sure. At one point on the drive home, Frankie hung his head out of the passenger-side window and stared at the stars, giggling, as the wind whipped his face. But he never let go of your hand.

The exhaustion from the night seems to hit you both once you return to the comfort of his apartment, a small orange fluffball hopping off the couch to run his body against your lower calf.

“Hi, Leo,” Frankie whispers, squatting down to gently scratch the cat’s chubby cheeks.

After stripping your clothes and turning on his television in the bedroom, the lull of a sitcom settles him into slumber. You lay with Frankie in bed, his arms slung low around your waist and his head nuzzled into your chest. He snores quietly as Leo curls up between you two.

Sleep seems to escape you, because every time you close your eyes, you picture a young Frankie with a tortured past. A shit father, a not all there mother. How was he so seemingly pieced together as an adult?

With one hand gently stroking his hair and massaging his scalp, you use the other to search capgras syndrome on your phone.

The National Institutes of Health describes it as, the most prevalent delusional misidentification syndrome and is characterized as a delusion of doubles. Patients falsely believe that an identical person has replaced a person close to him or her… CS symptoms may result in intrapersonal and interpersonal conflicts, along with poor social relationships. An individual with this kind of disorder is prone to self-harm and violence. There are also implications for the patient's family, as the stress on the caregiver and stigma-related stressors could further compound the issue.

Clicking the lock on your phone as fast as you can, you shakily sigh and wrap your arms tighter around Frankie.

It’s like nothing you’ve ever heard of and Frankie was at the center of it all. It felt like your stomach bottomed out thinking of what he had seen.

Was his mother ever violent with him? Or to herself?

And this letter from his father that Benny mentioned, what did it say?

You manage to exhaust yourself to sleep, but it doesn’t last long.

Frankie sweats bullets, his body rustling against the bedsheets that now make him feel confined. His heart hammers against his chest and pounds in his ears.

These dreams would be just dreams if they were happy, but there’s nothing happy about what he sees.

On a stormy night, his mother cries. The sobs fill the house, his younger sister fears it’s a ghost by the shaky howling that sways down the hallways to their bedrooms.

“It’s okay,” his uncertain voice reverbs as he fluffs her light pink princess pillow and tucks a lilac quilt over her small body. He smiles convincingly and closes the doors to his closet.

He walks alone down the dark hallway, his eyes anxiously peering from left to right. He spies his father downstairs drinking alone at the dining room table. The glass bottle shimmers as lightning strikes outside.

Is he passed out or impossibly still?

His mother lets out another wail.

“Goddammit,” his father curses to himself, shaking his head and finding a coat from the closet before slipping outside and into the rain.

It’s okay, Frankie thinks, because it’s easier to take care of her when he’s not around to intervene.

With a breath of relief, little ten-year-old Frankie walks downstairs and gets a glass of water. He’s so scared, his hands won’t stop shaking. No matter how much he tries to fill his lungs with air, the shaking doesn’t stop. Dribbles of water slide down his hand and wrap around the outside of his tiny wrist.

He follows the cries with hesitant steps, lightly pushing open the door to his mother’s bedroom.

“Mom?” He asks into the dark, his voice soft and squeaky.

“No! No, get out!” Her cries have turned to yelling, scrabbling up to the top of the bed and flushing her back against the bed frame.

“It’s me, mom, Frankie,” he whispers, slowly walking forward with an arm extended with the water.

She lets out another wail and shakes her head, causing Frankie to lurch back. He thinks the lightning strikes and the thunder booming outside is scaring her, and all he wants to do is soothe her panic.

“D-do you want some water?” He asks as she sniffs, her wide and unblinking eyes enough to keep him awake at night.

In a wake of reality, she wipes her face and whimpers. “Is that really you, Francisco?”

His bottom lip trembles as he nods feverishly. “Yeah mommy, it’s me.” Can’t you see it’s me?

She slowly lowers the covers that she had previously clutched to her chest, nodding slowly. But then she freezes again, horrified, unconvinced.

“I-It’s not you.” She says with uncertainty, shuddering at another clap of thunder.

“Momma,” he whispers as he moves closer, reaching out and touching her arm as he stands at her bedside. “Drink some water, momma.”

He offers the glass, her eyes shifting from Frankie to the glass and back.

“No-no! Your smile is bigger! That’s not my Frankie, his smile is bigger! Stay away from me!” She yelps, harshly smacking the glass of water out of his hands. Frankie jumps but can’t pull away, the grip of her hand wrapping around his wrist burns.

“You need to stay away from me, you hear me? Stay away from my family!”

Frankie tries to pull away, his own tears sprinkling along his eyes as he yanks yanks yanks and finally he’s free, running out of her room as adrenaline pumps through his little body. He quickly closes her door on the way out, sobbing erratically as he runs to the safety of the staircase, black funneling around his imagery.

Frankie’s eyes pop open, feeling the tight hold of your arms like the one of his mother. He shoots up and pushes your arms off, seeing your sleepy eyes tiredly open.

“Frankie?” You whisper, soft eyes meeting his own.

Fear still possesses him, it was overwhelming like a heavy weight sitting on his chest. It was all-encompassing, his manifestations of terror and panic being linked to the feeling of being chased by something from his past.

“It’s me, it’s me!” He shouts, his throat feeling like something was clawing at it.

You nod your head and reach out for his arm to which he instinctively rips away from you.

“It’s me!” He shouts again, causing Leo to scurry off the bed. His stomach felt uneasy, dread pounding a dent into his head.

“I know it’s you, I know it’s you, Frankie,” you breathe out, pushing yourself up fully as you take his hand and reassuringly squeeze.

He swallows down an impossibly large lump in his throat, catching his breath seems impossible. He couldn’t escape it, overwhelming helplessness nesting itself deep inside. It’s always the same nightmare or similar variants from his childhood. He used to think that he had blocked them out, shoved them away to a teeny tiny part inside him, locked away inside a vault. But recently, they’ve been coming back in swarms.

The reality that his nightmare is over suddenly hits him and his back slumps weakly. Like a human no longer possessed, his physical existence slowly turning from mush back to something concrete. Suddenly, a sense of relief washes over him. It wasn’t real, he was safe, he was with you.

“Frankie, you’re crying,” you whisper, slowly moving your hand up to wipe away the streams on his cheeks.

Frankie’s shaky hand holds yours, tight, and brings it to his heart, letting you feel the impossibly strong beat.

“Fuck,” he breathes out, putting his head in his hands, “I’m sorry, I’m s-so sorry,” he quickly shakes his head, feeling his body subtly relax from the strong heat that was tingling from his head to his toes.

“It’s okay, you’re safe now, it was just a bad dream.”

He knows now and he nods, but he still feels lost between his past and his present.

He shouldn’t have drank as much as he did, and he certainly shouldn’t have smoked. He knows that now, but he was hoping it would help him sleep, keep him at bay until you were gone in the morning. But now you were here and he felt so exposed, his open wounds now out and in the open.

Please don’t run.

“I’m sorry,” he says on repeat as you slowly run a hand up and down his back, his body leaning into yours and nodding; he needed this, he needed you.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” you whisper, “can I hold you?” You ask so sweetly, your voice dripping in kindness lined with concern.

He’s already nodding as you gently wrap your arms around his broad torso. He puts his arms over yours and sighs weakly, his fingers interlocking with yours.

Comforting energy exudes from you, the thing he desperately needs the most right now. Your soothing voice is nothing like his mother’s anguished cries, breaking him into reality with the honey drip of your sweet whispers.

“A nightmare?”

Frankie nods and closes his eyes, wiping the stray tears that still fall down his cheeks.

“I never wanted you to see me like this,” he tries to laugh, but it just comes out wrecked and thick from crying.

Why was he crying? Why couldn’t he stop crying?

Your chin rests on the dip of his shoulder and he can feel your slow breaths against his back. He aligns his wrecked breaths with your calm ones, your bodies slowly becoming in sync.

He’s so tired. He wants to close his eyes, but every time he does, he sees the flashes of lightning outside his mothers window and hears her untrusting words.

It’s not you!

You sit together like this for fifteen minutes and he’s becoming grounded again. He strokes the blankets and relaxes the clutching hold he has on your hand.

“I’m gonna get a cold washcloth, you’re burning up.” You whisper. He doesn’t want you to go, but he knows it will help - something his mother never understood. Help was good.

“Leo wants to sit with you,” you whisper as you round the bed, Leo already leaping up onto the bed and circling himself between Frankie’s parted legs.

“Sorry buddy,” he whispers, his voice raw and still shaky, but no longer feeling like he was choking on the air his body was desperately craving.

With hazy eyes, he watches your body move in his bathroom, the light making his eyes squint. Your soft legs tucked under his large t-shirt was a sight. He was definitely here again, in the present.

Benny had warned you, but nothing could have prepared you for that. But again, your usual feeling to run wasn’t here, because Frankie really fucking needed you right now. Your own concerns about this relationship were pushed aside. He needed comfort and reassurance, love where there wasn’t any before.

You soak a washcloth in cold water until your fingers turn numb under the streaming faucet. Squishing out the excess, you return to his bedside and gently dab at his neck. His honey-amber eyes have never looked so dark and lifeless.

He blinks slowly, he must be so tired. Frankie rests his hand on your upper thigh, fingers sinking into your plush flesh. He’s trying to ground himself, you think. A reminder that this was real.

“It must have been really scary,” you whisper as you bring the washcloth up to his rosy cheeks, then to his temple and across his forehead. “Does this feel good?”

He nods and squeezes your thigh reassuringly. “Really good.”

“Okay, baby.” You whisper, running the washcloth slowly down both of his arms. The cooling sensation should help him fully awaken. You rest the washcloth on the back of his neck and rest your hand on his now cool cheek.

His words ring through your ears, begging to be heard that he was real, that it was him. It was a dream about his mom, it had to be.

He lets out a breath of relief, smiling weakly. “You must think I’m insane.”

He grapples to find the right words, and you think it’s best to come clean.

“Benny told me,” you whisper, seeing his eyes harden at your truth. “About your mom, Frankie. Is that… is that what your dream was about?”

He sits impossibly still, but something in his gut must condemn him to tell you the truth. “Yeah, it was.”

You nod and run your fingers delicately across his cheek, giving him a reassuring smile. “You can tell me what you want when you’re ready. But it doesn’t scare me off, and I don’t think you’re insane.”

An exhausted breath of relief mingles between you both and he agrees. He’ll tell you when he’s ready.

“My dad, he sent me a letter and the nightmares started again,” Frankie whispers, brokenheartedness laced in his words.

You press a gentle kiss to his lips, one of understanding.

“I wanna read it to you in the morning.”

You give him a tight-lipped smile, nod, and kiss him again.

After making Frankie a sleepytime tea in his favorite mug, he settles back into bed. He was so vulnerable tonight when he really had no other choice. He falls asleep with his ear to your heart, and his arms wrapped loosely around your hips.

You stay awake and watch the television for as long as you can, hoping the comforting vibes of a sitcom will calm your racing heart. Gentle fingers draw shapes over Frankie’s back and you share a look with his cat. One that said you were both in this together. As the sun slowly slips across the horizon, your eyes finally close knowing this night of terrors is over.

Series Masterlist l Previous Chapter | Main Masterlist | Notifications Blog

#frankie morales #frankie morales x you #frankie morales fanfiction #frankie morales smut #frankie morales x reader #fuck yeah frankie #francisco morales #catfish morales #triple frontier #triple frontier fanfiction #frankie catfish morales #francisco catfish morales #pedro pascal #frankie morales x f!reader #francisco morales smut

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dazaiandhislovelybandages · 4 months

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Every Corner Of This House Is Haunted {Gojo Satoru}

A/n: It doesn't contain spoilers for the recent manga chapters

Pairing: Gojo x fem!reader

Trigger warnings: mentions of death

Every normal couple goes through tough times. Some worse than others.

The only problem with you and Gojo was that you were far from a normal couple. A jujutsu sorcerer and a commoner. The strongest and... well a normal person.

For the first few months of your relationship Gojo wouldn't tell you anything. All you knew was that he was getting paid a lot of money. Later on, he started to tell you a few cryptic things but nothing serious enough to worry you. It didn't take you long, however, to put two and two together and that was when the 'fights' began.

They were never anything serious, just petty things that could be resolve withing a day if not a few hours -Gojo is a clingy man afterall.

Until today.

No matter how many times the two of you had argued, not once had you slept separetely. You didn't live together but whether the arguement was through the phone or in person, Gojo always made sure that you would sleep in the same bed.

But now you were in his bed, in his apartment and Gojo was in the living room.

Not once had you seen him this angry and it made you even angrier. So now you were left there, laying in bed, hugging one of the extra pillows he had which was now soaked in tears.

On the other hand, Gojo was half sitting half laying on the white couch, looking at the ceiling. He could understand that whatever happened was his fault but the rest... He knew that you would never understand the life of a sorcerer, let alone his life so he always tried to keep things lighthearted, he would bring you souvenirs from his trips and all kinds of things. He really was the perfect boyfriend when it involved taking care of someone else.

When it came to take care of himself...

The strongest was lacking.

That was also how the arguement started.

There were some days when you had deemed it important for Gojo to talk to you about whatever bothered him. And today he made the mistake of telling you about some... plans he had in case things in the future were to take a turn for the worse.

"You cannot be serious!"

"I am."

When it came to his job Gojo could get worse than Nanami.

"Satoru, if you die, I expect your body back, and whatever mind or soul or whatever in there too."

"You will get a body but," He let out a sigh and took a step back. "Forget I ever said that, I'll go take a shower."

"Oh yes right! Avoid explaining why you are willing to let them use your body if it means winning."

"I didn't mean to say it. It doesn't matter okay? Forget I ever said anything."

"Suguru and I were and are the only ones treating you as a human and you are about to shut me out once again because you're used to being seen as nothing more than a weapon. But hey, forget I ever said anything, Satoru."

That phrase was what led you in the situation you were in right now.

This was the only time you weren't sure if you actually had the guts to apologise to him. You meant what you had said and you weren't going to take it back because he had to hear this from someone. But you knew the moment you would come face to face with him again, you would burst out crying.

You couldn't take the look in his eyes out of your mind. He looked hurt, he looked confused, he looked angry... all in one. And it was heartbreaking because him being sad and angry was normal but confused?

"I am... sorry." His voice was what you heard first and then the door opened slowly and he walked in. The whole room smelled like his cologne and... "Come on, talk to me," you felt the matress shift beside you and without putting any thought to it, you moved to the side so he could lay there as well.

"I am sorry," you whispered.

"Nothing to be sorry about, sweetheart."

You could swear it was muscle memory at this point because you turning around to face him and Gojo wrapping his arms around you were in perfect sync.

"I love you, I just-"

"Shh," his big hand found the top of your neck while the other rubbed circles on your back. "I love you too. In fact."

"Oh no," you giggled. Gojo hated keeping the conversations between the two of you serious.

"I love you so much that I will buy us some galvanized square steel, eco-friendly wood veneers and I'll borrow screws from that weird aunt I have and we'll expand this house."

"You don't speak to any of your relatives Satoru."

#gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru #satoru gojo x reader #gojo x reader #gojou satoru x reader #jjk satoru #jujutsu satoru #jjk gojo #gojo saturo #writing #anime and manga #anime #manga

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litnerdwrites · 5 months

Text

Justice for Nesta recs (AO3)

Most, if not all, of these recs are in the Justice for Nesta/ ACOSF rewrite/fix-it vein. It will be updates as I find more fics, but feel free to send any recs you have.

TRIGGER WARNING! Many of these fics will be very dark, with references to suicide, ptsd, misogyny, and IC BS. However, I'll be sure to add specifics where applicable.

Fics For Those Craving Nesta JusticeI put all the fics I found into one collection on AO3 that, as the title suggests, are for those craving Nesta Justice. Please read the relevant tags for each fic, as many of them contain reference to PTSD, SA (both past referenced and in story), and general IC BS.

I'll also list every fic in this collection bellow, just to keep them all in one place. Feel free to also add your own finds or works if you have any. The collection is open, but moderated.

Those the Stars Cannot Hear by @kataraavatara An ACOSF rewrite where Mor makes good on her threat to leave Nesta in the CON.

Baby, now we got bad blood by Pumpkinspice_Lou They say you should never come between a male and his mate. Rhysand should've known better. Aka Cassian finally choosing Nesta. Completed two-shot.

A Court of Vice and Victors by Wishcamper Acosf rewritten by a therapist. Need I say more? Incomplete.

You Made Her Like That By BookWorm77071 A few days into their Hike from Hell, Nesta is able to form one coherent thought: I don't want to do this anymore. So she stops. Three chapter short story. Completed.

Nesta becomes a baby by Theladyofbloodshed Exactly what the title says. Oneshot.

A Court of Tangled Flames by Theladyofbloodshed A Neris fic where Nesta gets the love story she deserves.

ACOTAR snippet collection by Theladyofbloodshed A collection of Acotar what ifs.

Nesta vs. The Buffer by Theladyofbloodshed After Nesta finally snaps at another 'family' dinner, calling Cassian and Mor out on their shit, she begins to heal and fall in love on her own terms. With a certain shadowsinger. Completed. Nezriel fic. Anti IC but they kind of redeem themselves at the end. Completed.

AU Where We Pretend Acosf Didn't Happen by Theladyofbloodshed An alternative take to ACOSF, starting from post ACOFS. Nesta ends up leaving Velaris, starting herself on a journey of self discovery and healing. TW Beron Vansera, implied/referenced SA, IC being assholes.

Nightmare Dressed Like A Daydream by This_Immortal_Hope Nesta was a wolf. So, much like a wolf, she bided her time, accepting her exile with ice in her and determination in her heart. When she was ready, she tore their Court of Dreams apart with their own hypocrisy. One shot. No ship. Rhysand is thoroughly put in his place. Oneshot.

Second Chances by miryamdev Cassian apologises to Nesta after the HOFAS bonus chapter.

A trick of the light by closet_monster There was nothing condemning about madness or paralyzing fear. Nesta was familiar with both — they seemed to be a recurring theme in both womanhood and life in Hewn. Oneshot. TW Depression, self harm, and implied abuse. Please double check the tags before reading.

Burn for Eternity by rosemai Nesta is defeated and broken down by the words of her sisters and the IC, so she takes matters into her own hands and meets a group on individuals who could give her the help she needs. Incomplete.

Nesta's Truth by grovellingboyfriends After another year of leaving Nesta alone, Cassian finds Nesta in her apartment on Solstice, standing over a dead man. TW for implied SA, parental abuse, Elain is a bitch. 3/5 chapters published as of making this post.

Daylight by Flowerflamestar Nesta Archeron, banished and betrayed, ran from cold and hatred straight into the light of Day and found a place where she could belong. Completed.

Might I Suggest You Don't Fuck With My Sis by MacabreGiggles The intervention rethought, where the Archeron sisters decide to stand up for one another and put the IC in their place. Incomplete.

I died. I will die. It's alright. I don't mind. By MacabreGiggles Nesta resorts to other means to cope, like drugs. Incomplete. TW. Abuse. Alcolism. Suicide. Sexual assault. Drug abuse.

The Veil of Silence by Hrizantemy There exists a veil of silence, it shrouds our voices masking our truths, muffling our cries, our voices are muted, and dreams whispered. Incomplete.

You're a crisis of my faith by porque_nolosdos Nesta and Elain leave the NC, and upon seeing the IC's reaction, Feyre decides to ditch them too. Incomplete.

A thousand cuts by adelindschade It finally clicks for Cassian just how badly Nesta was hurting (it only took three TW suicide TW attempts), so he decides to try thinking of what Nesta would want. This decision leaves a ripple effect that will change the NC as we know it. Incomplete.

The consequences of normality by TheTeaQueen After the events of ACOSF, things seem relatively normal. Until Cassian realises that Nesta doesn't ask for things, or that self hatred still grips her, or the facade she puts on for her family. When she starts cutting back on training and work in the library, he begins to worry. Maybe things aren't as perfect as he thought. Maybe their methods in helping her weren't as effective as he thought. Incomplete.

Three little words by TheTeaQueen Cassian finally says those three little words that Nesta needed to hear. Oneshot.

Like fire, she raged by TheTeaQueen Emerie stands up for Nesta and puts Rhys and Feyre in their place. Completed.

Of Death and Resurrection by TheTeaQueen Part 1 of In the name of healing and happiness. Nesta was ready to die. So to save Feyre and Nyx, she did. Can Rhysand, the only person who can save her, bring her back from the brink? Completed. TW Implied suicide, rape/sa, anti Elain.

Of Shadows and Light by TheTeaQueen Part 2 of In the name of healing and happiness. Technically more of a Gwynriel fic, but does have some Nessian since it follows the aftermath of Of death and Resurrection, only Azriel, Gwyn & Elain are the main focus. Ties up a lose thread or two from part 1, and is 100% Anti Elain. Completed. TW Implied child abuse, implied suicide, torture.

Of Reopened Wounds and Retribution by TheTeaQueen Part 3 of In the name of healing and happiness. A trip to the human lands to discuss the treaty leads Nesta to face Thomas Mandray again. This time, she has family willing to go to hell and back for her. Incomplete. TW Implied rape/sa, panic attack.

Lady Death and Her Kingdom by TheTeaQueen Amren pushes Nesta too far, causing her to awaken a strange new power. TW Implied child abuse. Incomplete.

The Hike, Alternatively by TheTeaQueen An alternative take on The Hike from Hell, where Nesta attempt to TW commit suicide TW, and Cassian realises just how messed up their methods, and the events leading up to the hike are. Written for Suicide prevention month. Completed. TW Self harm, suicide, The Hike.

To Pay a Debt by TheTeaQueen When Nesta sees that Feyre didn't include her in any of the paintings, she does the only thing she can think of; Run. Incomplete. TW, attempted suicide, suicidal thoughts, mentioned sa.

Burning from the Inside out by TheTeaQueen An au where Nesta's secretly lived with Chronic pain her whole life, only for the cauldron and her new powers to exacerbate it. Complete. TW Implied/referenced child abuse, suicidal thoughts, ableism, internalised ableism.

The Whole Truth by TheTeaQueen An alternative take where Nesta's deepest secret comes to light when Elain explodes at the dinner table one night. This forces the IC and her sisters to reevaluate their perception of her. Incomplete. TW: Child abuse, suicidal thoughts/ideation, forced prostitution, sexual assault (underage!!)

Set my Soul Alight by moodymelanist Nesta finds solace in Autumn. No Nessian. Completed. TW Implied/referenced child abuse, implied/referenced rape, implied/referenced torture.

Falling by becauseofreading Another take on what happens after Cassian tells Nesta that everybody hates her. Incomplete. TW Self harm, suicidal thoughts, blood and injuries.

Destruction and Renewal by Vorbi Nesta is given the opportunity to form new alliances. Initially, she scoffs at the idea, but after a small, final act of disrespect from the IC, she decides to see where this new path leads us. Incomplete. TW Implied/referenced abuse.

No One Likes A Mad Woman by Separatist_Apologist You made her like that. Nesta has had her choices tripped away, so when Eris offers her an out, she takes it. No happy ending for Cassian. The Night Court gets no sympathy. Completed. TW Domestic violence

A Cup of Tea by shaziskhalid After realising that the Cassian of her dreams isn't the Cassian she's mated to, everything changed. (MCU! Wanda, modern Au). Incomplete.

Promise by Daughterofthesea Begins during that scene where Cassian follows Nesta, and ends with him understanding just how much pain she's in, and deciding to actually help her.

Stay here (I love you, but I need another year) by littleplease Nesta is tired, and losing the will to even try. Complete. TW Apathy, depression, vuage suicidal thoughts.

What you did to me (I'll spend my life trying to rise) by filthymouthedslut Nesta is done with the IC's holier-than-thou attitude. No ship. Incomplete (3/4) as of updating this post.

Everybody hates you by Booksandsushi A different take on the time Cassian tells Nesta that Everybody hates her. Incomplete.

Change is good by Booksandsushi Nesta figures her life out on her own. Complete.

Truth of the Heart By TheFreakPanda The months after ACOFAS leave Nesta presented with some new opportunities. Full of therapy and dancing. Completed.

I've Always Liked to Play with Fire by catalyste After her village is destroyed and family killed by Hybern following Feyre's revenge mission, you wake up healed in the NC. After Lucien leaves you there, you find yourself trapped with Nesta Archeron, who turns out to be an unlikely ally. The two of you plan your escape with the help of Eris Vansera. Polly, Neris/reader, with IC bashing, and dragons. Incomplete.

The relapse by Janes_Melodies Something broke in Nesta when she learned about the results of the vote, knowing it was a tie until Feyre. She was trying for her sisters and for Cassian, yet they still think she's cruel enough to create a whole new trove just to kill them all. For the first time in months, she gave into her desires. Incomplete. TW Alcoholism, Implied/referenced self harm, suicidal thoughts.

You're safe now by annieleonhardtsring Rewrite of the scene where Nesta falls down the stairs, and Azriel stands up for her. Complete.

Love her how she should be loved by julemmaes Cassian overhears his family making some not-so-subtle comments about Nesta, and it pushes him over the edge. So he goes to bat for her, blaming his friends for everything wrong with their relationship with his girlfriend. Modern AU completed.

The Nest World - The Next Life by bat_called_phil ACOSF canon divergence fic that starts with the intervention, but diverts when Nesta takes a stand for herself, and Feyre starts holding Rhys accountable. TW Implied/referenced suicide, Implied/referenced abortion.

A Court of Spite and Isolation by xxTAO Nesta choses the human lands, separated from the IC and the distractions from her trauma, she spirals. Incomplete (4/6) TW Suicidal thoughts, Implied/referenced alcoholism, Suicide attempt.

Come Home by Rhysanoodle Cassian learns how Nesta's been living since she came to Illyria, and which fears haunt her the most. Complete.

#pro nesta #anti inner circle #anti ic #anti acosf #nesta deserves better #pro nesta archeron #anti rhysand #nesta acotar #anti elain #the archeron sisters deserve better #anti rhys #anti amren #anti cassian #anti feyre #anti mor #anti morrigan #fic rec

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strongheartneteyam · 1 year

Text

Realize where you belong.

Pairing: neteyam sully x female!human!reader/female!dreamwalker!reader

Chapter 3

CW: angst, reader is a loner, reader works her ass off every day at the lab, fluff, neteyam being cute towards reader (even tho it still has weird vibes lol), mad jealous neteyam, TRIGGER WARNING for depression symptoms (such as being moody n having less appetite than the usual), stalking, obsessive and toxic behavior, also TRIGGER WARNING for reader mentioning the word “suicidal” in an internal monologue (she IS NOT actually suicidal, she just feels really sad and mentions the word. if u read it, you'll know what I mean)

Not proofread. I'll do it as soon as I can ♡ I hope it's a good chapter 🥲 & thank u to everyone who's reading this fanfic, who left a comment in the last chapter and, of course, to everyone who asked to be in the taglist I LOVE Y'ALL 😘💕💕💕

Chapter 2

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Mother looking at me

Tell me, what do you see?

Yes, I've lost my mind

(...)

Will I ever be free?

Have I crossed the line?

All the things she said, running through my head

All the things she said (t.A.T.u)

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

You woke up feeling like crap that morning.

Your last shift had been so demanding. You had to cook just so much food that you started to wonder if there was anything left in the pantry. You had gone into that room just so many times yesterday to get ingredients and kitchen utensils, your legs felt heavy and sore now, as you stretched them in your small bed.

There were just too many people to eat in that damn laboratory.

Meanwhile you, the cook, barely had any time left to eat. There was always just so much work to do. So many dishes to wash, so many vegetables and meat to cut, bread to prepare from scratch... Your head hurt just thinking about it.

You felt so stressed out that you preferred to unwind a little instead of eating, sometimes. You would find a quiet place, sit somewhere, put your headphones on and press play on one of your many curated playlists or in one of your favorite songs. Listening to music seemed to work like a medicine to your wounds and, going to the cafeteria and having to socialize, to have people all around you felt too much, so, you just tried to avoid it. You even started to lose a little weight because of it. Nothing too much, though. You were only slightly thinner than you used to be. But in the back of your head, there was always a voice saying "Please, take better care of yourself...". Despite knowing that voice was right, you were too tired and apathetic to care.

Ever since you started to Dreamwalk, it was like your whole world had changed. That old life you led did not seem to be enough anymore. It never was, in the first place. It could never compare to the heightened senses you had when you were in your Avatar, helping you smell and hear everything better.

The first time you spent a whole afternoon running alone through the Pandoran forest next to Hell's Gate, you felt alive like you had not felt in years.

But nothing gold can ever stay. Way sooner than you expected, you had to be awakened from that magical dream. Everytime you came out of the technological machine you had to lay inside of to be able to drive your Avatar, you thought "Damn! Why wasn't I born a na'vi? They're so freaking lucky to have such an incredibly beautiful Planet to call their own. If only Earth was still as beautiful as it used to be..."

When you were not in one of your free days, you would always work until you felt exhausted and fed up with everything. It was not a walk in the park to be a cook. Even though you loved cooking since you were a teenager, when you used to always mix different ingredients and spices and create new recipes, this profession forced you to spend most of your time standing up and to have little time to sit and rest your poor fatigued legs. In some days, all you wanted was to sleep for 12 hours straight. And God knows you were capable of actually doing that.

Not a long time ago, you slept so much that, when you eventually woke up, it was 2 pm and you almost got fired from the lab when you finally showed up at the kitchen you were supposed to be in since 6 am.

You promised yourself you would never do that again. You just could not afford to lose that job. And you wanted to cry just thinking about not being able to Dreamwalk anymore. Exploring Pandora was the peak of your life, currently. It was when you felt high as a kite. As funny as it sounded, it was true. You felt euphoria run through your body everytime you got to have blue skin and be over 8 feet tall.

You liked to cook and was good at it, but, you were a smart, intelligent girl who knew much more than people thought you did. Unfortunately, you could not manage to get a higher position at the lab. Your forte was not sciencey stuff. It was subjects like Human History, Languages, Philosophy... At best, you got to use your language learning skills to learn basic na'vi fast and was able to get an Avatar from the lab. At least that was a good thing that your tiring job provided you. God knows that privilege was one of the few things keeping you alive. You goddamn hated you life, your job, everything... All your days seemed to be the same. Same chores, same annoying people... Most scientists did not try to hide that they did not see you as an equal. Even though they were always really polite to you, they would not let you in in their little groups, in their upbeat conversations through the laboratory corridors. You could count in one hand how many of them used to talk to you with genuine interest in hearing what you had to say.

You sat every day next to the less valued lab employees: janitors, cleaning ladies, other cooks just like you and so on. Your race had never been good at realizing the worth that these hardworking people had, anyway. Why would they do it now? You thought it to be so sad...

Those employees were nice regular people. Even thought some of them were idiots and treated you badly, there are people who behave like that anywhere. You were thankful that most of them were polite to you and treated you well enough. You also had a close friendship with one of the female employees, a cute, humble and really kind girl called Crystal. But she was your only actual friend. You did not remember the last time you had made an actual effort to make a friend, to be nice to someone in hopes you could get to know them better and they could become a part of your life. You had to admit you had been really grumpy lately.

You could easily blame such moodiness on your lack of will to keep living that life you currently had. It’s not that you were suicidal, it's just that you wished you could live a better life.

There was also Derek, the tall, cute boy you would make out with every now and then. You did not have a proper name for your relationship with him. He was always lovely towards you and you two would have really interesting conversations together and sneak around to kiss each other and do other types of heated stuff (though you never had sex with him) anytime you both felt like it. But it did not happen that often, anyway. You did not put much thought into it, to be honest. Derek was just a friend you would fool around with. You could not be farther from being in love with him or anything of sorts.

After another tiresome day, you walked fast towards your room. All you could think about was how nice and cozy your bed would feel when you would lay your body on it. Only five minutes after you finally laid down, you fell asleep. Slumber had been bugging you all day. Lately, it had always been like that.

They say you have to be careful what you wish for. That your words and thoughts have power over what happens to you. And you learned it the hard way.

In one of your infamous busy but boring afternoons, something unexpected happened to you.

Seemingly out of nowhere, a na'vi young man appeared outside of your glass window and tapped slightly on it. You almost choked on your own saliva when you saw that huge, blue creature staring at you with wide yellow eyes. A scream got stuck right in the middle of your throat, since you got so startled you could not get your vocal chords to obey the command your brain was sending them. What the hell was that na'vi doing in front of the laboratory? They did not use to come to Hell's Gate. And why was he looking at you through the kitchen window?

The na'vi boy just would not stop staring at you. His gaze was so intense it made you feel unbelievably uncomfortable. Suddenly, he pointed to the left. The big, ample door that led to the open area in front of the room you worked in was right at the same direction his four fingered hand was pointing to. You realized he was signaling to you that he wanted to see you outside of the lab.

You started to say, in your own mind: "What kind of weird situation is this?"

"Please?" You heard the alien plead in fluent English (he only had a typical na'vi accent), his voice coming through the narrow gap that existed between the glass and the window frame. His eyes reminded you of the eyes of a small kitten asking for food.

You got surprised by the fact that he was able to speak English. You wondered why he had learned it and who taught him the language.

You tried to reach for the door to try and inform someone that there was a na'vi around and ask if anybody knew who he was when you heard the alien say:

"Don't go, please! I just want to talk to you! I'm not gonna hurt you."

Your back was turned to him. When you turned around, he was smiling.

"It's incredible how you're even prettier up close."

"I'm sorry?!" You answered

"Oh, forgive me. My name is Neteyam. Neteyam te Suli Tsyeyk'itan. It's really nice to meet you." He was still smiling.

That name was familiar, Neteyam te Suli... Oh, of course! Neteyam was the son of the Olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya clan, Jake Sully. He was very famous between the na'vi and the humans.

Neteyam Suli was one of the most feared na'vi warriors out there. A great archer and very skilled with the knives the Omatikayas made themselves, he fought fearlessly against the recoms, including Colonel Miles Quaritch, an old enemy of his father. Quaritch used to lead the RDA soldiers when he was human, before being "revived" and given an Avatar body. He died in battle against the na'vi. But that did not mean that there was finally peace between humans and the na'vi race.

But why in hell was Neteyam Suli trying to talk to you? It is not like the na'vi liked the humans. On the contrary, they despised your race.

"Uhmm... okay. Nice to meet you..." You tried to be polite and peaceful towards the na'vi boy, like you were advised to be by your teachers, back when you were studying and training to get your Avatar "But I'm sorry, what did you say? That I'm prettier up close?" Your brows were furrowing, your face full of confusion. Despite all, you were calmer now that you knew you could communicate with him in English. Your na'vi was not the best out there.

"Yes." Neteyam's big amber eyes shone when he looked at your face. You were beyond dazed. "I've seen you before. Many times actually. But only from far away. It doesn't compare to seeing you right next to me." His voice had a weird warm feeling in it, like he was already acquainted to you. But how could it be? You did not even know who he was before he revealed his identity to you.

"When did you see me...?" Your mouth was slightly opened, so bewildered you felt

"Don't you wanna come outside so we can talk better?" He said, seeming excited.

"Unfortunately, no. I'm good, thanks." Neteyam looked sad after you declined his offer.

"Why not? I told you, I'm not gonna hurt you. I promise." He smiled faintly. You could tell he was hurt by your blunt answer.

It pained you to act like that towards him. You admired the na'vi so much. Damn, you even would choose to be born a na'vi if you somehow could go back in time, before you were inside your mother's womb and you could talk to Eywa herself. But how were you gonna trust him? There were some na'vi out there, his mother, for example, that hated humans with such a boiling passion. What if he took after his mother? You would be in trouble if he tried to kill you. Even though the na'vi were a peaceful by nature race, everyone has a limit, so, you had to be careful when interacting with them. You learned about all the genocide your kind had committed against his kind while simultaneously destroying his Planet slowly, in a cruel, despicable way. You honestly understood the contempt the na'vi felt when it came to humans.

You looked at Neteyam with honesty in your eyes and said:

"Please don't take this the wrong way but I can't really trust you. I know you told me you're not gonna hurt me, but, I'm still human. How can I know you trust me, to begin with?"

"I trust you because you're different. You're nothing like the others from your kind. You're more like my people. And I love that about you." Neteyam said, smiling at you.

"Can you please just tell me how do you know me? Because I've never seen you before. I've only heard about you because you're the Olo'eyktan's eldest son and Olo'eyktan to be. But you talk to me like you somehow... know me. I'm really confused, Neteyam." He felt his heart race when he heard you pronounce his name. Your voice sounded so sweet to his sensitive na'vi ears, making him move them somewhat to the sides. It was the same voice he heard in the forest, when he watched you talk to yourself saying how beautiful you thought some yellow, bioluminescent flower that you saw in the grass was.

"You're a Dreamwalker. I've seen you around. I love how much you seem to appreciate and respect my Planet instead of destroying it like the others from your kind do. That's why I think you're more na'vi than human." He chuckled happily and you got confused by his last sentence.

You had to admit he looked cute when his fangs escaped from under his upper lip whenever he smiled or chuckled. But you felt so weird thinking that.

"I'm more na'vi than human?" You were intrigued "What do you mean?" You laughed a bit and he continued on staring at you in an intense manner.

Neteyam heard footsteps approaching, so, he started to move just so he could hide. He did not want any other human but you seeing him. He knew he could not trust them as he could trust you.

"Wait! Where are you -" before you could finish your words, he was already gone.

The brown wooden door behind you opened and Derek appeared carrying a pile of plates in his arms.

"Hey, cutie." He walked towards the sink, leaving the dirty dishes there to be washed by himself when he would be back in the kitchen.

"Hi, Derek." You smiled faintly. You were still recovering from that odd interaction you had with Neteyam Sully.

Derek came close to your ear and whispered:

"Feel like meeting me tonight? I miss you." You sighed

"I don't know... I'm not really in the mood, sorry." You answered, uninterested

He got a little surprised by your answer and moved his eyebrows up, making wrinkles appear in his forehead but quickly remembered he had much work to do outside, so, he walked towards the door and got out of the room without saying another word to you.

Neteyam was still out there, next to the window, leaning against the wall. He was listening to the conversation the whole time. He had to use all the self control he learned to have with the years to not hiss when he heard that human call you "cutie" and ask if you wanted to meet him tonight. Who was he, anyway? And why was he saying he missed you? Neteyam had never seen you show any sign that he was your mate before. He had to find out what was going on. Neteyam would not let anyone get between the both of you. It would not be a weak human male that would be the obstacle that would make him give up on his future mate. He was used to challenges and was not afraid of another one. That would probably even be fun. Neteyam could imagine that tiny mate of yours shivering in fear when he showed him his big, sharp fangs.

Neteyam decided he was gonna find out who the hell that mate of yours was. He was sure he was not better than him. That human male would never be as strong as he was. That human would never be able to hunt fresh food for you, walking through the forests of Pandora and confronting big, dangerous animals, like Neteyam would. He knew he outbraved that human. He could never be a good mate to you like Neteyam could be. You deserved better than him.

༊⁀➷

Taglist:

@xylianasblog @samistars @crazy4books1 @nerdybouquetofkittens-blog @explosiongamora @lik0 @your-girl-mj @darktyrantwinner @xxunnie @sereisstuff @yeosxxx @die4niyahhh @henhouse-horrors @lala-1516 @iman-lu @manumanulau @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @hana-yuri

I tagged some of you that did not ask to be tagged but left really cute comments on the last chapter that made my heart feel warm 💓 if u don't wanna be tagged, just lemme know

Also, if someone wants to be added to the taglist too just leave a comment below saying that 🤍

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2smolbeans · 8 months

Text

Yandere Obey Me Human World Au Writing Event! (Insert Your Mc!)

Summary:

Lurking around and thriving on earth as the seven deadly sins, the seven brothers often find themselves walking amongst the earth to explore and terrorize any humans that they find. While they spent their time on earth, they happened to find themselves sprialing into an obession for a particular human that caught their eye..Determined to get what they want, the avatar of the deadly sin is eager to steal, kill, and destroy anything in their path in order to have their precious darling.

The question is.. How will this darling handle this situation? Will they try to fight the inevitable? Accept their fate? Or perhaps escape their intense love?

The choice is yours.

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Disclaimer: This is free to use as long as you tag or credit me! @2smolbeans

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Rules:

There is no deadline for this event!

Please state that NO MINORS are allowed to interact with this post.

The story in the beginning must take place in the human world. Otherwise, as the story progresses, you can change the world building to whatever you want.

You can have as many demons as you want pinning for your Mc! (Ex. Leviathan x Mammon x Your Mc!).

No demoncest allowed.

You can add more than one or two Mcs if you have any!

Smut or Nsfw elements are optional to write.

Any writing format such as a headcanon post, jot notes, or even a scene is acceptable! However you want to express your thoughts - do it!

The oneshot/chapters can be as long as you want.

If you are going into triggering, dark, or dead dove do not eat territory, ADD WARNINGS.

With the tags already given below in each section, they are optional to follow! They are put there to just help or give ideas of how you want your story to progress.

You can shape or finish the story however you want to. Just make sure it makes sense given your backstory.

You aren't allowed to change the complete backstory of your chosen demon. However, you can add small details and change little bits of it. (Ex. The story takes place in the 50s, Mc isn't human, Mc is already in a relationship)

Side characters such as: (Simeon, Solomon, Thirteen, Mephistopheles, and Raphael) are allowed to be mentioned or paired with Mc!

If you have any questions regarding this masterlist, message me or put in an anon ask!

Don't forget to tag and credit me! I would love to see what you guys come up with!

And of course, have fun!

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Lucifer:

You are finally getting a start in your career. Everything is going smoothly, and you are gradually gaining popularity! But there's a rumor that's ruining your reputation and threatening everything.. Desperate, you call out to a demon through an ancient blood ritual. At first, it doesn't work, and feeling humilated at your stupid attempt - you prepare to clean up and go home. But with the room turning black and a hand touching your shoulder- Lucifer Morningstar himself looks at you with a soft smile and offers his hand for whatever deal you want to make. You say your terms, and he says his. Shaking his hand, the deal is sealed, and you find yourself soul bonded to him through a ring that is secured on your left ring finger. His low voice filled the air as he carressed your face, the sweet blind danger now trapping your fate. You unknowingly tried to escape in a previous life..

"My love, my beloved spouse, it's so good to see you again..I'm so glad you finally called out to me again."

"I mean how could you not? You are mine forever..You don't remember me do you? That's okay, I forgive you, time is in our hands."

"Now, I'll take care of whatever pests are bothering you - and I'll take you home where you belong. Now, now, don't struggle."

"You don't want me to do something you won't like."

Tags: Mc was with Lucifer in a previous life, blackmail, implied physical abuse, Mc thought they summoned a lower demon and not Lucifer himself, it's up to you if your Mc figures out what happened to them in their previous life, sadism, mind reading, forced marriage.

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Mammon:

Ever since the break up with your boyfriend, you've been an complete utter mess. You'll get over this, you thought, time heals. But as days turn to months, you were fed up with the constant pain that came from missing your now ex boyfriend. So fed up and looking for a quick solution to get over him, you decided to do the one thing you never thought you would've done...

Clubbing.

Every night you went, expecting to just wash away your feelings with alcohol and strangers. Though one day, it all changed when you had bumped into a particular white-haired male. He looked like your typical fuck boy with the obnoxious amount of jewelry adorned on his body and the open V neck shirt that exposed his chest. But to your surpirse, he was shockingly sweet when he saw right through your grief through that happy mask of yours.

One thing led to the next, you hugged him with tears in your eyes, thanking him for listening to your problems. From then on, something just clicked inside him. It felt good.. It felt eletricifying buying you things you enjoyed, giving his precious time and money, feeling rewarded every time you smiled. You made him go against his very nature, his very sin, his greed. Fuck you made the avatar of greed enjoy being charitable!

He needed to know more about you, he wanted more of you.. And more of you he got..

"I don't understand what type of idiot would just easily let ya go... If I were him, I'd make sure you'd never leave my sight, EVER."

"Seriously, what a dumb nuts. He's probably so fucking stupid that he'd probably kill himself out of stupidity. Man, wouldn't that be a total shame.."

"Hey..If you knew something terrible about me, you'd still stick by me, right? You said you'd stick by me no matter what. That wasn't a lie, right? You need me.. right?"

Tags: stalking, strangers to bestfriends, heartache, Mc has no idea Mammon is THE Mammon, manipulation, gaslighting, Mammon exploits Mc's grief as a way to 'win' their heart, exploitation of Mc's insecurities.

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Leviathan:

You hated every fiber of their being. They were so insufferable in every possible way that you fummed in anger whenever they were mentioned to you in any way. So how come they got everything without any effort, while you had to struggle your way to earn what you needed? It wasn't fair. Why did they have to be in your life? Every day, you chewed at your fingertips, annoyed and enraged with them dancing in your mind. Why did everyone like them? Why did you hate them? Why were they so insufferable? Why couldn't they just suffer the same way you were? Full of resentment and shame, you stalked and scrolled mindlessly through their social media, not knowing a particular someone had been watching you for a good while..

"What makes you think you could run away from me? Every part of me is ingraved inside of you. So just please stop being difficult.. I can be better than the fucking shit you obsess over."

"Why do I even bother with you anyway? I could've been better off with someone else, but for some reason, it had to be you."

"Don't you realise how special that is?! Out of all the beings I could've been with, I want you! I love you..Why can't you love me as much as you hate them?"

"Things were so good when you didn't know..Ugh, why did I think it was a good idea to show you what I really was..."

"Why can't you look at me? Look at me. I SAID LOOK AT ME."

Tags: the thing mc wants could be either a lover, object, or dream career- it's up to you, Jealousy, demon contract, Leviathan is a two faced snake in this prompt, stalking, guilt tripping, murder, forced relationship, violenece, eventual kidnapping, Leviathan is a pathetic but terrifying yandere who is easily enraged.

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Satan:

Wake up, get dressed, take the subway, sit in that awful chair for hours, go home, sleep, repeat. Every day seemed like a ticking time bomb. You wanted something more in life. You wanted more than to just repeat the same cycle of something meaningless. The littlest of things had always annoyed you whenever you forced yourself to go through the day. You hated how people tsked and laughed at the most mundane things, you despised the way your ugly uniform uncomfortably rubbed against your body, you would bite the inside of your mouth until it bled at the thought of having to sit in a room with those god awful people whenever there was a group project.

But you still maintained a smile.

There always seemed to be a knawing pain that clawed at your chest. You didn't know how to describe it, but it was there. Everyday that boiling pot of water inside you would brew and steam inside of you, and eventually you had snapped.

With bloodied hands and a smile on your face, you had finally found an outlet for your anger. If it wasn't for that tempting voice inside your head, you wouldn't have known of what to do! But thankfully with this newfound pleasure, you had found a way to enjoy your life throughout the annoyances.

But things don't last forever. In the corner of your eye during one of your "cleanups", you swore you saw a familiar blonde co-worker spy on you.

"What's wrong, hmn? Scared? But I thought you liked me? Have you been lying to me this whole time?"

"Let's make a deal. You do what I say, and I won't say a word about the people you've.."ranted" to. In return, you do everything I say."

"So please stop crying over nothing..Or else I'll give you something to cry about."

Tags: Mc is a murderer, Satan has been disguising himself as a human, blackmail, transactional relationship, coerced violence, and mental manipulation.

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Asmodeus:

You were going through college having the time of your life. Parties, men and women flocking to you, drinking, and just overall making new friends! Sure you had classes to catch up on, and sure you could be more careful handling the feelings of the people you've misled..But you were living your life! If they got so bumhurt because of you, then that was their fault for expecting more from you!

Though eventually, all the clubbing and partying got to the best of your grades, so you seeked out a tutor to help you out. Unexpectingly, the tutor you would found just so happened to be someone exactly just like you. He was someone well put together, someone who was the loud and cheerful, someone who knew how to get underneath people's skin. When it came to partying and seeking out that 'high', you and him were completely in sync with each other.

You kindled a friendship with him while he brewed a different type of bond in his mind..

"You're just as terrible as me darling, so don't act like you're all innocent and gentle. Come on.. Let's be horrible together, forever! It's not like you had a choice anyway."

"Come on! Don't force me to do something you wouldn't like darling."

"I always get what I want, so stop resisting, or else I'll chop those pretty fingers off, understand? Good job~"

Tags: Kidnapping, narcasism, both Mc and Asmodeus are terrible people, drugging, forced alchohol consumption, love bombing, black mailing, forced relationship.

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Beelzebub:

Working at a local bakery is calming and relaxing. Oftentimes, when work was over, you would secretly take whatever left overs where supposed to be thrown out for yourself to take home. One day, as you were preparing to shut down the shop, you saw a familiar ginger customer on his knees in distress. He was alone, disheveled, and on the floor in that alleyway. Pulling out your phone to zoom in onto the site so that you didn't have to walk in that alleyway (He was a big man afterall), you fought the urge to scream as he turned to reveal blood covered all over his mouth. Trying to record the sight to use as evidence for the authorities, you were horrified to see your phone spazzing out and glitching whenever you pointed the camera in his direction.

Mortified as you realised that the man on all fours was devouring someone beyond recognition, you ran as fast as you can- not realising Beelzebub already knew who you were and when you saw him. The next day, when you opened the shop, you were paranoid of seeing him again..It was fine at first since he seemed to dissapear for a while.

But to your misfortune, little by little, you would see him lurking around the shop and your lovely home. Eventually, one day, as you thought his stalking wouldn't get worse, the ginger haired male decided to order something from your shop! After all, he was always a regular. Taking his order as you shuddered at every word that came out of his mouth, his frame towered over you, and seeing you face to face up so close- he flashed a smile that exposed the gnarly fangs that were once covered in human flesh and blood.

"You saw me, didn't you?"

"Why haven't you done anything? Are you scared of me? You're like a small chimpmunk..So cute"

"I can smell every part of you..And you're just filled with fear..Aren't you just sweet?"

"I won't hurt you, so please don't be afraid of me. But you know what I am, so I'm afraid I can't leave you alone"

"I'll see you later, my adorable snack sized human"

Tags: Beel eats humans, stalking, murder, blackmail (Beel threatens to eat your loved ones if you don't do what he wants), possessive behavior, entitlemented from Beel, threatening.

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Belphegor:

Every day, you could barely keep yourself steady. Your brain was always foggy, room always a mess, and just overall, you could be doing better. But oh well, what's the bother? Things weren't that bad. You work a typical retail job. You could've done better, but it was too much of a hassle to go back to school and get that degree. You knew that if you had just pushed yourself more, you could've been doing a lot better than the same 9-5 job. But you're comfortable where you're at, and that's all that mattered to you. Plus, why bother trying when you could just live the luxurious life in your dreams without having to do much?

Your parents called you lazy for this, and your friends commented on how much your slothfulness was starting to worry them. But you couldn't care. Nothing mattered to you anyway. Going to sleep after finishing a shift, you drifted away, meeting a particular demon who would soon regularly torment you for his own pleasure and admiration. He would only come into your dreams, so he was harmless at best, or so you thought..

"What's the matter? Trying to wake up? Aww that's adorable..What? You want to wake up? Mhn..I don't want you to though. I like this.. It's easier to hold you"

"I wonder how long it would take them to find you. It's been a day since we've both been here.."

"If you want to wake up, you know that you'll have to do what I say, right? Or maybe you just need some more rest to think about it.."

"It's funny.. How many days will it take until for your body to rot into the matress?"

"It doesn't matter if you live or die. I'll have you either way. Whether it's on earth or forever in hell together."

Tags: Forced sleep, self-loathing, dissociation, violence, mental torture, emotional abuse.

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lokisprettygirl · 4 months

Text

Rain to his Fire (Modern! Daemon Targaryen x Female Reader) (Non Canon 80s Au) (18+)

Read Chapter 7 here// Series Masterlist

Chapter 8

Summary: For the first time in your life, you experience real pleasure by the hands of Daemon.

Warning: 18+, smut, crude language, description of Statutory rape, discussion of mental health (it's a fic based in a mental health facility), mention of child molestation, mention of physical assault, the fic would contain several mentions of several disorders like mpd, did etc, if something triggers you don't read, smoking,

Note: One of the dialogues between the two was inspired by the film x men ❤️

You looked at him shocked as he revealed that Dr. Vis was his brother. Suddenly, their behavior with each other made sense, but it also bothered you. How could brothers look so different from each other and why there were so many differences among them?

“Is he really your actual brother?” You asked Daemon to confirm the lingering doubt so he grabbed you by the shoulders and pulled you into his chest.

"How about we get you out of this constraining dress and put you in something more comfortable, like my shirt? And then I'll answer every question you have” his voice low and soothing as he asked made you sigh.

“I can't stay the night” as much as you wanted to, it was a risk you didn't want to take “Tell me something okay? If he's your brother then how come he's so harsh with you?”

“Because he hates my guts, always did.. always will” his voice raised slightly as he let out his frustration.

“But why?”

“Because I'm a dragon and he's not, or that's how I have come to interpret it now, all my life he has driven me insane, making me believe that I was not well, that I was sick like mum was-” his eyes welled up as he mentioned her so you held onto him tenderly by scooting closer to him and wrapping your arms around his waist.

"He doesn't even look like you," you muttered, comparing the striking differences in their appearance. Daemon's silvery silks were nothing like his brother's brown hair.

“He does not..he looks like my mum, she was a human-” he cut himself mid speech as he looked at the bewildered expression on your face “it's complicated darling”

“I'm trying to understand you daemon -” you mumbled to assure him that you weren't going to judge him for anything he'd share with you.

“I know”

You had so many questions running through your mind, especially regarding his mother but you knew that this wasn't the time or the place to ask them as he already seemed so distressed at the mere mention of her name.

“Why didn't you tell me before?” you asked softly

“I was waiting for the right time.. nobody knows here that we are related” he looked at you somberly so you brought your hands up and fiddled with the collar of his dress shirt.

“So he's the brother that raised you? Whose girlfriend chose to take advantage of you?” you questioned so he sighed deeply.

“Yeahhh”

“Oh god..does he know about that?”

“He didn't care. .women are disposable commodities for him..why do you think he's been divorced twice?” your eyes widened at the reveal, you didn't think of Dr Vis as a person that had any interest in marriage once. Besides your question wasn't for the woman, you just wanted to know if he protected Daemon after his girlfriend had taken advantage of his little brother like that.

“I didn't know that” you murmured under your mouth as you tried to process everything.

“He was married..his first wife was a real sweet woman, real motherly and then he betrayed her over and over again until she gave up on him”

“Do you miss her?” you asked him curiously so he chuckled.

“I miss being cared for at times -” he mumbled nonchalantly, and even though his words seemed as if he didn't care one bit, his eyes told a different story.

“I care about you”

A small smile spread across his lips as you said that.

“Oh you do now do you?” he asked in a teasing manner so you crossed your arms.

“Don't you feel cared for by me?” you asked him so he let out an audible smile and wrapped his arms around your waist.

“I wouldn't be baring my soul to you if I didn't..sometimes I ask questions just to watch that pretty mouth move”

You couldn't help but smile at the admission, his words often caught you off guard and made you feel all giddy in the best possible ways..

“Is it okay if I despise him?” you asked him as you tried to come to terms with the fact that Dr. Vis or Viserys was his older brother and not just his doctor.

“Feel free, he deserves it” he replied, his voice laced with a hint of bitterness and resentment and you didn't blame him at all, you had seen first hand how he has treated Daemon ever since he got here.

“Why are you here Daemon? Why did you agree to come here?” You asked him softly so he sighed and pressed his forehead down on yours.

“I hurt someone out there, it was either prison or this” your eyes flickered with a mixture of surprise and confusion all at once.

“Who was it?”

“Just some random prat I caught hurting an innocent girl. I didn't want to lose control but then he pulled out a gun. I felt threatened and I changed” Daemon replied with a hint of anger in his voice,

“Is he dead? That man?” you asked him curiously so he shook his head before he gave you a smile that some might have interpreted as sadistic in nature.

“No he's in an asylum somewhere being treated for catatonia” he mumbled as he grabbed the back of your neck and made you look him in the eye “Your old pal Criston and that moron Otto, they arrested me but Viserys convinced them to hand me over to him as I am supposedly unwell” he emphasized on the term unwell as he finished his sentence.

“First of all we are not pals. Secondly, let me get this straight, so the only time you have attacked someone is when you see people get hurt or disrespected” you asked him as you felt a genuine sense of admiration for the man in front of you.

“I'm not a good man or a hero if you're onto that” he scoffed so you gave him a smile.

“Mmmmhm that's not for you to decide” you said with a hint of teasing in your voice.

For a moment, it seemed as though Daemon was about to protest but his resolve seemed to fade as you looked at him so adoringly.

“Did your mother love you real good?” he shifted the conversation so you sighed.

“Mmmmm well she was gentle but she spent half of her days here, at times she wouldn't even come home. My father left her for a younger woman when I was like 10 so she was all I had” his eyes softened as he heard your voice barely above a whisper.

“I'm sorry..I can beat him up for you if you want me to”

You giggled as he said that and the sound of your giggles warmed his rigid cold heart. You were affecting him in ways he never thought possible. His guard was slipping away more and more everyday. You were bringing out a side of him that he had never let anyone else see, a side that was gentle, genuine, and real.

“You're cute” you mumbled as you stared at him for a moment before you caressed his scalp with your fingers and then a thought came to your mind “I want to see you like that..in your other form i mean..i want to see the dragon in you” you mumbled with clear determination in your voice. His expressions darkened as he weighed his words before speaking.

“Mmmmm you believe me then?” he asked softly so you raised your brow.

“I do believe in you”

“You must be insane to believe such a thing” his tone was riddled with playfulness and you couldn't help but chuckle again.

“Am I though?”

Without a second thought Daemon's lips met yours once more as he kissed you passionately. The heat of his body against yours was almost overwhelming, the tenderness in his kiss so deep that you felt your heart pounding in your chest, wondering how you had gone thirty years of your life without experiencing this feeling but then you remembered that unwanted kiss you had shared with that man and you knew you had made the right choice by waiting to get touched by a man who made every inch of your skin tingle with a mere look.

The next morning you were outside in the garden where patients were enjoying the sunny day, playing cards and having a picnic with each other while Daemon sat all alone on the grass, distancing himself from everyone, but his eyes were fixed on your form so you looked around and made your way towards him, the smell of freshly mowed grass and blooming flowers filling your nostrils as you walked.

“You should mix up, aren't you bored?” You asked him so he grinned at you and chuckled,

“It's not my idea of fun really”

“Mmmhm, I can't believe I have never really asked you this, but what did you do out there? For living, I mean?” you questioned him so he leaned his head back and sighed, his eyes lost in thought.

“I used to teach” he finally replied and it took you a second to respond because you felt as if he was messing with you.

“Really? That's... unexpected”

Teaching was the last thing you'd have thought of if you had to guess his profession.

“What's that look for? I can't be a teacher?” he teased, his brow raised with a hint of humor.

“What grade? I can't picture you teaching little kids,” you questioned him as a smile creeped onto your lips.

“They're not so little, I was a professor in a state college”

“What subject?” you inquired, your curiosity piqued.

“Sociology” he replied with a small smirk.

Despite his rough appearance and the fierce way in which he carried himself, you somehow still found it believable that he was in the teaching profession. You could totally picture him as the charming, dashing professor who captivated his students with his wit and intelligence. The hot mysterious professor every girl in the classroom had a secret crush on, fawning over his every word and gesture.

“You're something mister, I must admit” you smiled as you sat down next to him, though maintaining a proper amount of distance. "Why were you so rude to me on the first day?" He turned his head to look at you as you questioned him before he looked away.

“I was embarrassed” his voice sounded hurt so you grabbed onto his fingers to caress it with your thumbs.

“Why?” you asked

“Didn't want a pretty girl like you to think of me as some sort of deranged lunatic, I was projecting really” he mumbled as he turned his head to look at you

“What changed your mind?” you asked him so he smiled like a cheshire cat.

"Your scent did, that night when I sniffed you i was able to read you like an open book"

Just a day later Dr. Vis was called away from King's landing to attend a seminar in London and luckily it was your day off so you knew you were going to spend your whole day with Daemon because it was unlikely that Viserys would return tonight amidst the storm and heavy rains.

Taking the opportunity, you decided to shower and dressed up in a beautiful red dress, you also did some makeup but didn't go overboard with it.

You had informed Shyla that you would perhaps go out and meet up with your friends, that totally didn't exist anymore, just so they wouldn't really look for you in case of an emergency.

With a skip in your step and your heart filled with anticipation, you made your way to Daemon's room, the sound of the thunder striking and rain pattering brought a feeling of contentment.

The thought of seeing him was both exciting and terrifying, making butterflies rage in your stomach.

As you arrived at his door, you took a deep breath before knocking. He was taking his own sweet time to open but as he finally let you in you noticed that he just had a towel wrapped around his waist as he was freshly out of the shower so you turned around to give him some privacy. Despite your passionate kissing encounter since the night of the gala, you still weren't quite used to the intimacy between the two of you.

“Put on your pants sir”

You heard him chuckling at the command but then he moved around his room to grab a trouser from his closet.

Suddenly you were grabbed by your arm and pulled into his chest as he leaned down to kiss you. And you'd be lying if you said you hadn't been thinking about being kissed by him all night long and perhaps do more Today. A gasp escaped your throat as he picked you up by the waist effortlessly and wrapped your legs around him as he led you to the bed.

Your nerves were a wrecked mess at the moment, adrenaline soaring high, as much as you wanted him to touch you everywhere, all of this was really intimidating for you.

You had never been with a man like him before or any man for that matter but especially a man of his caliber brought you plenty of excitement but also terrified you. He was so physical with you in general so you could only imagine how intense he must be in bed with a woman.

You snapped out of your thoughts as he laid you down on the bed before he got on top of you so you looked at him nervously, your eyes raked over his chiseled torso, he looked so strong but so beautiful at the same time with his silver locks and dark piercing eyes.

“What scares you the most?” he asked as he tucked your hair behind your ear so you gave him a small smile.

“That you would not enjoy me?” you mumbled, your voice barely above a whisper as you looked away, feeling embarrassed by your admission

“Enjoy you huh?” he repeated, a smirk evident on his features.

“I wouldn't know what to do daemon..I'm a grown woman who should have been married with children but here I am, a virgin, flinching everytime your fingers are near my ummm-...myy” he interrupted you as you clearly hesitated to finish your words. "I can't even say the words"

“Your warm cunt?” he spoke huskily, making your face flush at the unabashed words.

“My bits yes..”

“Can I kiss you again?” He asked you so you nodded immediately and he had his lips latched onto yours without any further delay, his fingers tightened around your hair as he caressed your scalp gently.

“That's crazy talk sweet girl..i am going to enjoy you more than i have ever enjoyed anything in my life, and it's not just your body that makes me want to ravish you, it's you, your sweet scent” he mumbled as he placed his nose into the crook of your neck “and this generous spirit that you carry, and honestly?” He looked at you intently as he cupped your cheeks, his thumb dragged over your already swollen lips.

“It's really hot when you're squirming underneath me. You have no clue what it does for an animal like me”

“You're not an animal -”

“ I am and you dig it pretty girl don't you? Thirty years and you didn't allow a man to touch you and it took me a few weeks to get you so willing to be underneath me hmm?” you gasped as you feigned an offense at his words.

“Are you calling me easy?”

“You're not easy, far from it" Daemon said, his eyes fixed on you as he puts both hands on your cheeks, his fingers tracing your jaw and lips. “But that's okay..You can be easy for me, you can be my easy girl and it won't make a smidgen of difference to how i feel about you” he whispered, his voice low and raspy in your ears, hands went under your dress as fingers trailed over the soft skin on the inside of your thighs, sniffing deeply he let out a grunt. The scent of your arousal thick in the air.

“It's exciting isn't it? Being spoken to this way?” He whispered in your ear so you hummed in response but it came out in the form of a whimpering moan instead.

“Turn on your side for me” he mumbled softly so you obliged “that's it ..good girl” your breath hitched as his husky voice gave you goosebumps all over again. Your fingers clenched around his biceps as he unzipped your dress and turned you around on your back again,

He grabbed the sleeves and lowered the dress until it was resting on your sternum, you had your bra on still but you still felt completely exposed.

“Daemon –”

“Mmmm I'm right here darling..I won't hurt you i promise, tell me to stop anytime you want me to yeah?” he rolled your dress up to your thighs, making your back arch on its own, placing your arms over your head you clutched onto the bedsheets in anticipation of what he was going to do to you next.

“No sex okay? You promise?” Your eyes teared up as you questioned him so he placed his head on your torso and placed a soft kiss.

“I'd never do anything you don't want or need my darling yeah? Can you trust me?” He asked, his voice gentle so you nodded in response.

You wanted him to show you the actual meaning of pleasure. You wanted him, no that wasn't right. In that moment you needed him, you craved him. He crawled up to meet your eyes as he slid your soaked underwear down your legs which made you shut your thighs close together as tightly as you could.

He caressed your legs with his fingers while he kissed you softly, the longer his lips stayed on yours the more comfortable you got with the idea of having his fingers between your legs, he didn't even have to force your legs open, the cold air hit your bare wet soaked cunt as you spread your legs apart involuntarily. Breasts squished into his chest as you felt his fingers rubbing over your dripping lips,

“Dae–” you moaned as his digits played with your intimate flesh. Hazy fog clouded your mind as you allowed the reality of the moment to kick in, a man was touching you, a man so hot, so sexy, so goddamn attractive was touching you in places you have barely touched yourself.

“Mmmm there it is..” he whispered in your ear as his fingers caressed your bundle of nerves.

“Mhhhmmmmm ohhhhh god”

“How does that feel sweet thing?” He whispered in your ear so you bit on your lips so harshly he was afraid you'd draw blood, as his thumb rubbed over your clit you couldn't help but squeeze your thighs around his hand.

“It's…unreal..your hands are on my–” you hesitated to finish your sentence so he grabbed your chin with his vacant hand.

“Your cunt”

“My ..”

“Cunt..say it”

“Mmmmmmm my cunt” you mumbled almost inaudibly, the whimper in your voice made him want to mate with you right now but he knew he had to control that monster inside of him.

“That's it..that's a good girl, breathe for me darling” he mumbled softly as he rubbed your clit slowly in circular motion with his thumb.

The strings of moans that left your mouth only enchanted him further, the sight of you with your arched back and eyes rolled so far into your head was better than what he had imagined in his head in the past month, the scent of your arousal intoxicated him as if he was heavily drunk.

It felt too much at once but at the same time it didn't feel enough, you needed more of him and the thought scared you. What was he doing to you? How did he carry such power to turn you into this person you had never been before? The person you never thought you'd ever become.

His lips trailed down wet kisses from the valley of your breasts, for a moment he sucked on your clothed nipples and that's when you brought your arms down to clutch your fingers around his silver locks.

No matter what you did though, your eyes remained closed, you didn't want to see yourself or his face between your legs as if you were committing a sin, a sin that you were most definitely basking in.

He held onto your thighs and stared at your dripping hole for a moment, your virginity intact as the day you were born and the knowledge only warmed his blood further.

You let out a cry of pleasure as he placed his mouth on your clit, he knew he had you all whipped for him, he never had a woman drip this way into his mouth before, you were gushing with want and he was more than eager to consume you completely.

“Daemon..daemon ohhh daemon please” you murmured under your breath and he looked up at you once to commemorate the view, engraving the succulent sight of you in his head as you experienced the pure carnal pleasure for the first time, then he got back to sucking on your dripping juices as if he'd never get a taste of you again. And good lord if you didn't taste divine to him. To know that no other man had the opportunity to see you like this only increased his appetite for you. He didn't know what he had done to deserve this but he was grateful nonetheless.

For once in his life he felt worthy of something good in his life and it wasn't because of anything he had done to warrant such satisfaction but it was all you. When you looked at him he didn't feel like such a failure in life.

He placed his tongue flat on your clit and halted his movements for a second just to feel those swollen nubs pulse over his tongue.

“Daemon– i am –”

“I know” he kissed over your clit before he sucked them into his mouth again “Let go princess, you deserve it”

Your fingers pulled on his ear as you felt the knot twisting and breaking in the pit of your stomach. Body thrashed around, chest heaved like a crashing wave, thighs closed around his head, almost suffocating him as you rode through the best orgasm you have ever had in your life.

He wrapped his lips around your lips and sucked it in once before he got up slowly, leaving a trail of your own release on your skin.

As he looked into your eyes, you cupped his cheeks, your thumb rubbed over his lips, they seemed red and swollen and wet and you wanted to kiss him but you didn't know if you were keen on tasting yourself so you refrained.

“That was…something” you mumbled as you got back to your senses slowly and he couldn't help but let out a chuckle and grabbed your panties to wipe his mouth before he kissed you senselessly.

“I'm keeping that” he mumbled as he pulled away a little and shoved the panties into his pocket, your face flushed at the blatant shamelessness as if he wasn't between your legs just now.

“Are you okay?” He asked you softly as he caressed your cheek so you nodded.

“More than okay…I'm good” he smiled as he pecked your lips once more.

“I'll go clean myself up” you mumbled as you tried to get up so he looked at you with his brows furrowed.

“Let me take care of it”

“No it's okay i promise” you kissed his cheek so he didn't make a fuss about it. He wanted you to take the pace as you saw fit, approach this in whichever ways it felt the most comfortable.

A few minutes later you stepped out of the bathroom and jumped into the bed to lay down next to him,

“Should we do something to you now?” you asked him nervously so he chuckled in response.

“Pleasing you is not transactional for me..quit worrying”

“Okay I just…don't want you to think that I don't want to”

“ And I just want you to enjoy the aftermath of what you just experienced alright?” He mumbled as he turned to you and pulled you closer to rest his forehead against yours.

“Tell me something about yourself” he said as his fingers caressed your cheek.

“mmm like what?”

“Anything”

You went quiet for a moment seemingly lost in your thoughts.

“Daemon?” You mumbled softly after a moment of silence so he propped himself on his elbow to look at you as he tucked your hair behind your ear

“I think I was molested as a child”

Okay that's so far from whatever he was expecting to hear from you.

“Go on”

“it's nothing ..never mind” He grabbed your chin between his fingers and made you look at him

“Talk to me”

“I just.. have this memory of being so little, perhaps I was five, and I was in school and my mom often used to pick me up very late so I'd just stay in my classroom, drawing or just learning my alphabets” he nodded as you mumbled hesitantly even though the glare in his eyes was unmistakable. “There was this gardener i remember who made me sit on his lap one day and then he caressed my behind but i remember his hands being under my skirt”

His brows furrowed as he caressed your scalp with his fingers to calm his nerves, fire burning inside him in several ways as he thought of such a little girl going through something so terrible.

“At the time i didn't really understand, I was uncomfortable but I didn't know that it was a bad thing, it was only when I got older that i really figured what he was trying to do”

“Was that a one time incident?” He asked you softly so you nodded but then there was a look of uncertainty on your face that he didn't quite miss.

“Would you recognise him if you see him today?” he asked so you thought about it for a moment. You remembered his face but you weren't really sure if you would recognise him today.

“I like to think that i would but he must have gotten older and I'm not really sure if would recognise him instantly, I just hope I was the only girl he had ever touched like that”

Well that was wishful thinking.

“i won't hesitate to kill that bastard if I could get my hands on him”

You smiled as he mumbled with such determined rage evident in his voice

“I know you would” you caressed his cheek before you leaned into him to kiss him softly, his rigid tensed body instantly softened in your arms as you snuggled against him.

“So what are you planning to do with my panties?” you turned the conversation so he sighed.

“Well later this night, I'm going to get naked, have it wrapped around my cock as I jerk off, all while pretending that I'm fucking that sweet wet cunt of yours” he whispered in your ear, voice deep and husky but at the same time playful.

“You're filthy”

“Mmmmm and you like that don't you?”

“I do..will you..can you touch me here again?” You asked him as you placed his palm over your breasts, making his breath hitch in his chest.

“Your tits hmm? Sure I can ..That feels good? Becoming an addict already huh?” he teased you but you couldn't even retort as you felt his fingers began to glide over your clothed curves,

“Yeahhhh”

“You're so inappropriate love” he mumbled before he sucked harshly over the soft skin of your neck, his hands continued to fondle your tits as he called them.

Your dress rode up again he wrapped your legs around his waist, the scent of your arousal was thick in the air as you didn't have your underwear on and his touch enticed you all over again, your cunt dripping salaciously. You felt like a slut but you loved it.

“Fuck i love your sweet scent” he murmured under his breath, his voice was deep but whispery. “Want to please me?” He asked you so you nodded immediately, you wanted to make him feel good even if you didn't really know how, you wanted to hear him moan and groan on top of you.

“What should I do?”

“Nothing, just let me do this, yeahh?” He mumbled as he drew a gasp out of you again by bucking his hips into your dripping core..

Even with the layer of his black trousers you could feel his hard thick muscle rubbing against your wet naked cunt, your fingers caressed over his back and as you traced your fingers over the scars on his back he let out a grunting moan,

“How did you get them?” You asked him softly and for a moment his hips stopped rocking against you and he grabbed your jaw between his fingers to kiss you deeply before he continued again. His hold was rough and possessive in nature.

“My wings ..they come out of there”

Your eyes flickered as he said that, you weren't even thinking about it but you were beginning to believe in the myth that he might be.

“They hurt when they come out?” you asked as you rubbed your fingertips over the scars, making him growl in response.

“Everytime”

His fingers clutched around your hair and you winced as he pulled on your roots harshly, your back arched into his chest again and the sensation was only building more and more for both of you but then he stopped all of a sudden and got off you to get away from the bed. You were in shock for a brief moment, not knowing what you had done wrong or why he seemed so upset all of a sudden. Once the shock withered you lowered down your dress and sat up to look at him standing a few feet away from you with his hands resting on his waist, he was breathing heavily and he was looking everywhere but you, his sudden shift in the mood made you feel awkward so you fixed your dress and zipped yourself up.

“What's wrong?” You mumbled softly so he wiped the sweat beads on his forehead with his palm,

“Nothing..”

“Did I do something wrong?” you asked nervously,

“It's not you alright?” he immediately affirmed.

“Okay” you clasped your hands together on your lap as you stared at him for a moment. He took a deep breath and finally approached the bed to sit down next to you.

“Are you okay?” you questioned so he let out a deep sigh.

“Yes, I was losing control and you don't deserve that..yet” he mumbled softly so you looked at him all perplexed.

“What do you mean, I was enjoying it?”

“Don't say stuff like that”’

“Why not? I'm just telling you the truth”

“I just want to be gentle with you love and take care of you, you don't know what you want yet, this is all so new for you”

You stared at him lovingly as he said that before you turned towards him and cupped his cheeks to kiss him softly.

“You're a good man”

“I am not-”

“You're good to me” the smile on your face only got bigger.

“You make me want to be good with you”

“You like me” it was more of a statement than a question and for the first time you saw a hint of blush apparent on his cheeks as if he was caught red handed.

“Of Course i do”

“I like you too” you mumbled as you kissed him again, his body felt hotter than usual but it brought you a weird sense of comfort you have never felt before. You often heard of women getting clingy to men after sleeping with them and you never wanted to be that woman but it seemed inevitable at this point.

Unbeknownst to you Daemon didn't just stop because he was losing control or becoming rough in literal meaning of the word but because he could feel himself turning, as soon as you had placed your fingers on the scars over his back he felt himself shifting and it scared him.

Because he knew he'd end up scaring you if you had to see him like that.

“I have been here all day, i should sneak back”

You mumbled softly as you kissed him so he groaned but then hummed in response. This affair with you was going to get dangerous and both of you needed to keep it as discreet as possible.

You stepped out of his room feeling every cell in your body flaming, the feeling of his mouth between your legs, the touch of his fingers all over your body was exhilarating but your nerves shut down suddenly as you bumped into Criston on the stairway to the fourth floor.

“I have to show you something” he said hurriedly as he grabbed your arm so you looked at him shocked.

Now what did he want?

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

Taglist

@anukulee @ammo23 @littledark11 @stupidthoughtsinwriting

@daenny-t @avalyaaa

#daemon targaryen x female reader #daemon targaryen #daemon targaryen x reader fluff #daemon targaryen x reader smut #daemon targaryen x reader angst #non canon au #modern daemon targaryen au

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yunjardi · 1 year

Text

my heart bel♡ngs to daddy [series]

[young sugar daddy!jake × fem!reader]

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[click here for this series' masterlist to read previous chapters, general warnings, and playlist]

[!!chapter warnings!!: smut [mdni], angst, some fluff?, DADDY KINK, overstimulation, unprotected sex, reader gets lifted up, smoking weed, arguing, crying, mentions of food, mentions of toxic family (!!!) lmk if i missed anything!]

*sorry for any grammar errors

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-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-

chapter 15: lipstick stains

upon arriving home from the japan trip, you gave perry some extra food whilst telling him how much fun you had as if he was listening to your rambling. traveling is fun and all, but nothing beats the feeling of being able to take a shower in the comfort of your home before climbing into your own bed. really the only downside to coming back from a few days off is the work shifts you have to make up. good thing you had an earlier than usual shift; earlier shifts mean you'll have more free time later in the day when things get really busy.

it was quick for you to doze off considering that you had such an eventful few days and now you were thinking about working. but before you could fully fall asleep, you remembered to text jake. you knew he'd worry if you didn't text him at least once before you went to bed.

your tummy filled with butterflies from simply texting the guy, so you could only imagine how much more excited you'll be to see him.

an uneasiness crept up on you while you read the texts over and over again.

why did he speak to you as if he's your boyfriend?

why is he always so affectionate?

'whatever, it doesn't matter, i'll just sleep,' you forced yourself to stop thinking about it in order to get to sleep.

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you woke up at the ripe hour of 3PM in the afternoon which left you with only about an hour and a half to get ready for your shift. springing out of bed, you ran to begin getting ready.

since it was your first day back, you wanted to look extra appealing to the customers because tips are always appreciated, right?

you made sure to put on a bit of makeup to hide the fact that you'd woken up so late, and you headed off to the bar.

the bar had become a bit of an anxiety trigger ever since that girl came around, but you came to realize that she was probably just trying to start some shit because she was most likely bored. you were there to work and nothing else; she just happened to get in your way.

before you could even get to the break room to put your personal belongings in your locker, an excited yeji engulfed you in a tight hug.

"ah, it feels like forever since i last worked a shift with you! innie and i missed you so bad while you were away with your little boyfie in japan!" yeji blabbed excitedly while you two were still hugging, "innie was all sulky because he was stuck with me the whole time ha! you already know how i like to annoy him on purpose."

it made you feel genuine joy to know that your friends were at home waiting for you to come back. you decided to wait until you could all meet up to give them souvenirs that you bought them.

"i never wanna leave you guys again," you remarked as you two broke the hug to begin your shift. yeji nodded in agreement while you guys made sure your outfits were in check before heading out.

the feeling of mixing drinks again felt oddly comforting. after all, it's all you used to do before jake came around; taking care of your customers was something that was important to you because it was once your main source of income. but now that jake was in your life, you didn't have to worry too much about how many tips you made, though it still boosted your confidence to see stacks of cash being given to you.

secretly, you'd been saving up all your tips to get jake a nice gift as a way to thank him for everything. sex was still somewhat a way to 'thank him,' but your heart wanted to make something truly meaningful for some reason. you also didn't want to use jake's money to buy a gift that's for him, so that was a reason to work harder.

your plan was to buy a designer white, long-sleeve button up shirt and make a recreation of the iconic maison margiela kiss-mark shirt. you thought of buying him an original one, but 1. there are only a few in the entire world, and 2. it's a crazy expensive piece of clothing. but it's more personalized and truly one of a kind if you remade it yourself, so you were trying to earn and save as many tips as you possibly could. your backup plan if you didn't have enough money was to make him some sort of baked good that was decorated to say something not-so pg-13 as a little joke. you felt more driven to put even higher quality work into your job because of this. you almost didn't want your shift to end because you were hungry for as many tips you could get. plus, you were having a great workday since no one who's previously messed with you during a shift has shown up.

when the time came for your workday to end, you eagerly walked back into the staff lounge to gather your belongings and head home to count up your money. you hoped and prayed that you could slide by with the money you'd earned.

you wanted to give something, even if it wasn't much, back to him for giving you what you feel you didn't deserve. you always believed that he could put his time, money, and energy into someone or something else, but after he told you that he chose you, you couldn't help but feel guilty for the times you pushed him away, for the times you didn't trust him because you barely trust anyone.

'i want to prove myself to you,' you thought to yourself as you walked to the bus stop, 'i need and want to trust you.'

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the bus ride felt so long which made you even more antsy to get home, but you were more than happy to hop off the bus and speed-walk to your place.

you barged into your house, locking the door behind you before busting into your room to quickly count up your money. if you had enough, you were immediately going out to get the materials you needed so that you could finish tonight and give him his gift the next day.

your heart beat got faster as you realized that you had more than enough money to get everything you needed for your project and some supplies to bake something for him as well as an extra surprise. letting out an excited squeal, you quickly changed out of your work clothes to speed to the shopping center that was closing in an hour and a half.

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you swore that your heart rate hadn't slowed down until you got back home from the shops, hands full of everything you needed to begin making your gifts for jake.

you decided to mix the ingredients for a tray of brownies and put it in the oven so that you had enough time to complete the shirt just in time for the brownies to be baked. you managed to quickly get everything in the oven and began prepping the shirt soon after.

laying out the (outrageously overpriced) white gucci long-sleeve button up on the clean counter, you applied a shade of red lipstick that jake had bought you and began meticulously placing gently kiss marks on the top part of the shirt. it was, surprisingly, turning out better than you anticipated. once the lipstick was set, you took out some fabric paint you bought from the store to touch up the kiss marks, afterwards putting paint sealing solution onto all the kiss marks to further protect them.

as if the timing was perfect, you heard the oven beep. you hung the shirt up in your bedroom before placing the warm brownies on the counter to cool down. you couldn't help but smile to yourself as you imagined what jake's reaction may be to your gifts, especially the brownies.

once they were cool enough, you spelt out 'i love ur huge dick' in chocolate letters as a joke. you knew jake would have a good laugh before eating them. placing the finished brownies in a clear plastic container, you put them aside to begin packaging the shirt in a flat box.

there was one last touch to the gift that you'd been meaning to do for a little while.

you dug out a small ring box and placed a spare key to your house inside it. you figured that he deserved to have one considering how much he took care of you. plus, everyone, 'everyone' meaning yeji and jeongin, who you'd trust with your life had one, therefore it'd be fitting if jake had one.

placing the dainty little ring box inside the same box that contained the shirt, you sealed it so it was ready for you to take to his house the next day.

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the next day came quickly, and you hopped out of bed to gussy up before calling a taxi to head to his place since it'd be quicker to do it that way than if you were to go on the underground train.

you wore a cute, short, pleated white skirt paired with a black and white prada cardigan, white knee-high stockings, and some simple black prada heels to tie the outfit together. you wanted to look pretty for jake since you were showing up to his place unannounced.

the taxi ride to his place was quite long considering that he lived on the opposite side of the city, the city being heavily divided by social class, but it was interesting to look around at the other houses.

finally, you arrived outside the gate of jake's house, typing in the security code that jake gave you to open the gate. now, you had to practically trek across his extravagant front yard and circular driveway just to get to the damn front door. the walk you had to take throughout the front yard felt longer than the taxi ride.

you reached out to ring the doorbell, hearing it echo through the house from outside. since jake's ahem- mansion was quite large, you always expected to wait a minute before he actually came to let you in; it was honestly painfully awkward to just stand there. finally, you heard the door unlock, and you were greeted by a shirtless jake clad in only joggers and a small towel around his nape. you also could help but notice that his hair was now a shade of brown which made you laugh do yourself because of how you made fun of him about doing bald. regardless, his image was making you blush.

"oh, princess," jake said with surprise in his tone, "i didn't expect you to come this early in the day." he smiled sheepishly as he witnessed the shock in your face from seeing him shirtless as if you hadn't seen him in this state a million times. "well, i came early because i brought gifts!" you smiled at jake as he guided you inside, his hand on your lower back. "that reminds me," jake smiled, "i have something for you as well." you couldn't help but become shy at the thought of jake getting you a gift even though he does it literally all the time.

once you got into his main lounge area, you set the clear brownie container and the gift box side by side on his coffee table. jake hovered over the container to read the little message you left on the brownie slab, his giggle turning into his signature laugh. jake moved toward you, hugging you from behind.

"well, if you love it so much, why don't you fuck it?" jake asked you teasingly, gently biting and kissing your neck. "now?" you asked with wide eyes to which jake responded with a hum, the feeling of jake's hard becoming prominent against your back. "if you say so," you shrugged, trying to tease him by seeming nonchalant.

jake moved onto one side of the couch, tossing the towel that was once around his nape onto the table whilst inviting you to sit on his lap.

he pulled you into a messy kiss as you began to grind your hips down hard against his, jake feeling the soft moans you were letting out against his lips.

without breaking the kiss, jake managed to get you out of your clothes, besides your knee high stockings which jake found incredibly sexy, and have you grinding on his bulge. you moved your hands to pull his joggers and boxers off, still as impressed as ever at the sight of his cock. pushing your hips toward him, you took hold of his member and put it against your lower stomach, admiring how deep his cock would be buried inside you. seeing you 'measure' how deep he would be turned him on even more, which he didn't even think was possible considering the fact that he's already fully hard and hot and bothered.

jake quickly lifted your hips, impatient and wanting to be inside you. feeling his thick tip pass through the first few inches of your entrance made you go insane, your walls already tightening around jake's cock. "it barely fits yet you still take every inch so well, princess," jake praised, "now be a good girl and start moving for me, okay?" you nodded in compliance as you gently lifted your hips and collided into his, jake letting out a satisfied groan. jake was so deep inside you that you swore you could feel him all the way in your stomach.

he let you bounce on his cock, adoring how cute you were while moaning as you fell into spells of pleasure. "fuck," you let out a whiny moan, biting your lip gently afterward, "you feel so good, jakey. it's so deep inside me." jake smirked at the way he could feel your thighs gently trembling on top of his, knowing that you were falling apart over his dick.

at this point in time, jake was fully just thinking with his dick which led him to swiftly get up off the couch, still holding you, and begin fucking you while standing up.

your eyes were rolling back as you moaned loudly for him. you were so overtaken by pleasure that you couldn't even let him know that you were about to cum. the feeling of your cum running down jake's hard-on had him fucking you harder, faster. even after all this time, jake's stamina still takes you by surprise. no one could ever do it like jake; he's the only one who could make you go this crazy.

jake soon brought you back to the couch, still not finished with you. he roughly turned you around so that you were facing away from him and made sure you were comfortable before shoving himself back inside you. you let out a loud moan at the sensation before jake began thrusting into you from below, his hands running all over your body yet still keeping you steady at the same time. you, once again, found yourself cumming all over his cock without warning, your orgasm washing over you in waves. "mmm fuck," you whined out, still being stuffed with jake's member, "that feels so good, daddy."

not long after you, jake's orgasm also took over him, hot ropes of cum spurting into you as you tried to catch your breath. it was probably one of the craziest orgasms jake has ever had.

still quietly panting, you let jake pull out so that you could plop down on the couch next to him.

"you're fucking insane, you know that?" you asked with a light laugh once your breathing slowed down. "only because of you, you know that?" jake countered your comment, nudging you on the shoulder playfully before standing up to retrieve some wet wipes from one of the bathrooms so that you two could clean up.

"here, i'll go upstairs and get us some clothes," jake smiled at you as you now tried to hide your body away as if he hasn't seen it a million times already, "if we don't cover up soon, we'll probably end up fucking again." jake joked and let out a laugh, though you both knew his statement was fully true. taking his discarded sweatpants with him, he headed upstairs to his bedroom to fetch some clothes.

you took that time to put your underwear and bra back on before jake came back downstairs. after all, it was kinda starting to feel weird just sitting fully naked in his mansion that had huge windows off to the side from where you were sitting.

soon, jake came back fully dressed and holding out something for you to put on: one of his short-sleeve shirts, a pair of your leggings, and those mid-calf nike socks that you thought were obscurely over priced for just a pack of 4 (but you had to admit that you loved them).

"ah, i forgot your gift," jake sighed as he remembered that he'd left the gift he had for you all the way upstairs, "wait right here, i'm gonna wrap it real nice since it's still up there." he flashed his cheeky yet shy smile, slightly embarrassed that he had 1. forgotten it and 2. hadn't even packaged it yet. "you're silly," you laughed as jake dragged his socks on the marble floors to get back over to the stairs.

you took it upon yourself to get up and go place your gifts for jake over on the kitchen counter since the brownies seemed out of place just sitting on the coffee table. picking up the brownie container and gift box, you headed over to the kitchen to place them both on the counter.

glancing off to the side, you noticed two glass cups next to each other. of course, you wouldn't have thought much of it because why would you, but you couldn't help but notice that one of the cups' rims had faint traces of red lipstick on it.

suddenly, your stomach felt sick. you couldn't tell if you were upset or angry. all you knew was that you wanted to get the hell out of his house.

you sped over to the coffee table, swiftly retrieving your bag and walking into the foyer where you put on a pair of sneakers, that you usually left at his house, and walked out the door.

you didn't slam his door per se, but you closed the door loud enough to make it known that you were leaving.

quickly, you dashed down his driveway and front yard, making it outside of the gate before hailing a cab to take you home.

it took everything in your power to not start crying in the taxi, your phone now ringing off the hook with multiple calls and texts from jake wondering where the hell you ran off to.

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"yeah, and n-now i f-feel h-horrible," you blubbered to yeji over the phone after explaining the situation and how you made the gift yourself only to be confronted by lipstick stains from someone else, "i literally d-don't even w-wanna think about h-him. god, i could puke right n-now." you sniffled loudly and blowed your nose into a tissue. "my sweet y/n," yeji sighed softly, genuinely feeling for you, "i know, i know, let it all out. heck, you could even scream at me if you want to. but seriously, he's such a jerk for that." yeji continued to listen to all the little things you had to say whilst she tried her best to cheer you up.

yeji was really the only other girl you had in your life besides literally yourself. you knew that you couldn't lean on any other woman for issues like this; especially not your mom for because she's on another level of asshole-ness, you didn't talk to your siblings either, your sisters in specific who you could really use right now, at all, so without yeji, you'd probably be doomed when it came to stuff like this.

"honestly," you sniffled, "...i feel like smoking weed right now." yeji couldn't help but chuckle at you. "go ahead, girl, just be safe or you'll get it from me" yeji joked from the other line, "anyways, you know exactly who to call for that stuff."

after hanging up the phone with yeji, you went straight to your contacts, calling someone else up while trying your hardest to avoid all of the missed calls and texts from jake.

"hey, yeonjun."

--------------------------------------------------------

knock, knock, knock.

you sprung up from your bed upon hearing the knocks at the door.

looks like yeonjun is finally here.

you opened the door and were greeted by his sly smile as usual.

you offered him to stay the night since you two would be getting high together, and you didn't want him driving home whilst not being sober. he, of course, jumped at the opportunity.

"hey, it's been a little while," you laughed quietly as he pulled you into a hug, "thanks for showing up on such short notice."

"oh, it's no problem, really," yeonjun shrugged with a chuckle, "now that university is over, i have nothing else to do."

you led him over to your room so that he could set his bag down and get everything ready. he made sure to bring some food over as well since weed tends to make you hungry. yeonjun may seem like the type of guy to just go over to a girl's house and not think about anything but getting some action, but he cared deep down.

both of you sat on the couch, and yeonjun got everything ready for you two to start smoking.

you let him take the first hit, watching him inhale deeply before letting the smoke pass through his pretty lips.

they weren't as pretty as jake's, though.

passing the blunt over to you, he let you take a hit before he pulled you closer and put his arm around your shoulder.

"you don't look the way you usually do," yeonjun pointed out, "there's something wrong, isn't there?" you sighed out after your next hit, nodding in defeat as you rested your head on his arm. "do you wanna talk about it, beautiful? a pretty girl like you should always be smiling," yeonjun asked, not forgetting to add a dash of flirting as he usually did.

"do you remember jake?" you asked as you passed the blunt to him, him nodding before taking a hit, "i think he's seeing someone else at the same time as we're having a... thing, if you can even call it that. i went to his place earlier today to bring him some gifts that i made him the night prior as a surprise, and i saw that he had two cups in his sink, one of them stained with dark red lipstick. it made me feel shitty, so i decided to leave without saying a word to him." you explained between the passing of the almost gone blunt which prompted yeonjun to get up and prepare his bong to smoke from.

"bro is a fucking sleaze, seriously. and i'm not just saying that to make you feel better, i'm saying it because i think you deserve someone who won't lead you on like that. please don't think that you're at fault for being upset," yeonjun reassured you, putting his arm around you again and letting you fall into him after taking another deep inhale of weed, "god, he's a fucking dick for that."

you couldn't help but let a few tears roll down your face as you opened up to him about what happened. you weren't even particularly close to yeonjun, but he just felt so trustworthy. were those thoughts maybe a side effect from being high? possibly. did you really care? nope. you just needed to get everything off your chest.

"please don't cry," yeonjun said upon feeling his shirt become wet with tears, "he is not worth it. guys aren't supposed to leave women in tears like this. remember that, okay?" you nodded as yeonjun helped you dry your tears.

at this point, you couldn't even keep count of how many hits of weed you'd taken. all you knew right now is that you were overcome with intense sadness, barely being able to stop your tears as yeonjun hugged you tight, his sweet cologne tickling your nose.

you were so out of it from your emotions paired with weed that you didn't even notice how quickly you drifted off to sleep.

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waking up, you didn't expect to feel your mattress underneath you. you got up and peered out your open door, seeing yeonjun fast asleep on your couch with a cozy blanket and pillow underneath his head.

quietly, you snuck over to your bathroom, looking at yourself in the mirror and staring at how shitfaced you looked from smoking all night. you decided to brush your teeth, wash your face, and fix your hair a bit to see if it'd make you feel better.

you suddenly heard the bathroom door creak open, seeing yeonjun's reflection in the mirror.

"oops, i didn't even think of knocking," he looked down sheepishly. "don't worry about it," you chuckled in response, "i was just on my way out anyway. wanna go out to get breakfast or something?" yeonjun nodded, already beginning to brush his teeth. you smiled at him before walking out of the bathroom to give him privacy.

while you were waiting on him, you decided to plop onto your bed and check your phone.

the calls and texts from jake were reaching the hundreds at this point. from what you could see, he'd been texting you almost all night.

you felt your stomach tie itself into a knot. you slid your phone to the other side of the bed and lied down, pretending to sleep so that yeonjun would leave you be once he got out of the bathroom.

you felt like sobbing your eyes out.

you hadn't gotten texts like these since you left home all those years ago.

shutting your eyes tightly, you tried to think about something else, anything else, but you simply couldn't.

the bathroom door creaked open, yeonjun walking out and spotting you on your bed. he figured that you went back to sleep and decided to chill on the couch until you "woke up."

suddenly, you heard a weird noise that startled you a bit, but you decided to ignore it until you heard the door open.

your soul fully sunk through your body. you forgot that you gave jake a spare key.

"and what do you think you're doing here?" you heard jake's deep aussie accent question yeonjun as you gulped. "i should be the one asking you that question," yeonjun argued back, "y/n? are you awake? we've got some company."

you had to bite the bullet, you had to. you crept out of your room, seeing jake and yeonjun staring at each other with fury in their eyes.

"jake, what are you doing here..." you sighed out as you looked down. jake ran toward you, relieved that you were safe. he reached over to pull you into an embrace which you rejected. jake swore the world stopped spinning when you moved yourself away from it; you'd never done something that...cold.

"uh, s-should i leave?" yeonjun asked awkwardly though still worried. "i advise you do," jake replied to him immediately. "don't talk to my friends like that..." you glared at him, causing him to stiffen.

"okay, i'll go," yeonjun sighed as he walked over to grab his backpack off the floor, "but if i hear that you put your hands on her, you're done for; i'll fuck you up, remember that." before he walked out the door, made sure to mouth 'be safe' to you.

"what the fuck, jake?!" you yelled out once the door was shut, "you didn't have to be aggressive with him! h-he was just helping me with something." it wasn't a complete lie.

"if anything, i should be asking you 'what the fuck!' you literally haven't contacted me since you abruptly left my house yesterday evening no matter how many times i messaged and called you! you had me worried sick! what the hell is going on?! was he here all night? is that why you didn't talk to me? did i interrupt your little fling?" jake rebuttaled.

"you're one to talk about having a little fling," you said under your breath before going off, "you're the one having girls over at your house one after another! you probably dyed your hair for her too... you were probably shirtless and fresh out of the shower because you had something going on before i got there, huh? you're lucky she left before i got there, right? she would've been so upset to see another girl over, wouldn't she? i saw that lipstick stained cup, jake, and i'm absolutely over it. i'm not just gonna sit here and act like i'm fine with this because i'm not."

jake sighed in frustration as he put his forehead on one of his hands. "look, it's seriously not what you think-"

"don't waste your breath. get out, get out and go back to her. what you do is none of my business; i don't give a fuck anymore."

"y/n, fucking listen to me, okay?!"

you flinched at the way he raised his voice. for the second time today, you were brought back to when you were still living with your shitty family. the yelling was getting to be too much, and you were trying your hardest to conceal the tears that threatened to pour from your eyes.

jake noticed how your body seemed to stiffen at how he was talking to you, and he felt horrible about it, but it was the only way you'd listen; he knew you well.

"that girl who was at my house prior to you coming over was the same girl who'd been harassing you at work. she came over unannounced to whine and question why i took you with me to japan instead of her, and i explained everything to her. i kindly asked her to butt out and which only made her angrier. she's trying to get between us, and i don't know what else to do but wait things out and hope she eventually leaves us alone and-"

"if i'm you're "everything," then why are you having such a hard time being assertive toward her? i trusted you, jake... i thought you actually cared, but it seems like you don't anymore."

so much for wanting to trust him, right?

jake's eyes widened in shock at the sudden realization that you heard him say that you're his everything when you guys were back in japan.

"w-wait, you heard that?" jake asked.

"wow, is that really what you're worried about right now? the fact that i heard you lie?"

"i wasn't lying! y/n, please stop being like this. i was serious then, and i'm still serious now. please don't cry."

you honestly didn't even realize you began crying until he pointed it out. frantically, you wiped your tears in embarrassment.

"h-how do y-you expect me t-to believe y-you?" you hiccuped through your tears, "j-just admit t-that y-you don't c-care about m-me." you fully sobbed your eyes out in front of him, your emotions making your body physically weak.

"y/n," jake's voice broke as tears rolled down his cheeks, "i-i just- i really care about you. fuck it, y/n, i can't take it anymore-

i love you..."

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a/n: dramaaaaaaa hehe, i hope you enjoyed this one 🩷 it's very plot heavy, but i hope you were able to read it all the way through without falling asleep 😭

taglist: @axartia @jjhmk @jayroseyy @ayohahaha @asaheyow @bunhoons @red-xherry @duolingofanaccount @lix-freckle3 @leeis @green-orangeade @imbaeksbae @sunghoonmybeloved @tum73er @sjakewrld @jeondolly @lalalalawon @jckeplanet @meinapricity @bubbleseo @cherryunie @bently-baby @fluffypiesstuff @teti-menchon0604 @rjsmochii @omgjwon @sunshine-skz @wy1999t @oceanyocean @nyfwyeonjun @mxshimoo @multifandombtvh @donghyckl @iloveoceaneyesss @jakeswhore @jinsfavoritedoll @brownsugarbaybee @heehee01 @mesopret @heesitation @heeverseblog @yoursjaeyun @mklhyvn @jungwon-xo @crazydelulu @kyurizeu @ineedsomezzz @graythecoffeebean

p.s. i removed lots of accs from the taglist that i have never been able to tag, so pls lmk if you don't see yourself here but you originally asked to be on the taglist! tysm!

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alessiamalfoyzabini · 7 months

Text

Dark Moon | Chapter Four

Pairing | yandere!Jimin x Reader

Word Count | 1,9k

Warnings | +18, violence, slapping, smut noncon, forced blowjob, abuse, yandere themes, humiliation, explicit and dirty language, forced cum swallowing, spitting, prostitution, Jimin is cruel (yes, it is a warning)

This fanfiction is yandere, if you don't like the genre, don't read and if you are not of age, don't read.

I don't want to hear any complaints in the comments, thank you.

This does not reflect my way of thinking or living at all, it is just a work of fiction, it is like watching a horror movie, many of us love horror movies, but we would never dream of what we see in those movies happening in reality as well.

Simply put, this story was written for entertainment purposes, it should not be seen as a reflection of my values, opinions or morals. I absolutely do not condone such acts.

⤷ Summary | She just wanted to escape her past, take charge of her life and break out of her steel cage, praying in God for a miracle that could change her life for good.

And her prayers were heard, but it was not the Divine that answered her.

That was certainly the devil in the guise of an angel, she thought as those corrupted and empty eyes searched her soul with extreme voracity.

He turned a sweet, false smile on her, before pushing her into the abyss.

➢ Author's Note | This chapter is stronger than the others, if you don't read yandere don't go on, it has triggering content.

Taglist: @katherine-kookie, @dragons-flare, @m00njinnie, @seokjins-luigi, @pjmsneverland, @jimincrystal, @ajkwww, @ungodlyjoon, @hecateslittlewitchling, @namjoonsbuspass

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"I have no problem shooting you right this instant. So I won't say it again, leave what belongs to me and never come back to this brothel."

Minho let go of the grip with which he was forcing the girl to suck him off, she fell back on the bed at dead weight, desperate for air, with tears clouding her eyes she saw Minho hastily compose himself, before Jimin moved to the side to let him out, still with the gun tightly clenched in his fist.

"This is not over, Jimin," threatened the man.

"I think it is."

"We'll see," was the last thing he said, before leaving that bedroom behind.

Y/N could not speak, too shocked by the experience she had just gone through, on her tongue she still felt the overwhelming taste of the bastard, but even more agonizing was the thought that Jimin had used her to anger Minho.

He could have acted that way from the start, but no, he had decided to give the man time to use her, making her feel if possible even more like an object.

She hated him, damn it.

"Are you still alive?" he asked her without a hint of tact, Y/N gritted her teeth inhaling through her nose.

"Does it matter? Dead or alive, things will not change. I'll live as a whore and die as one," she hissed, letting the boy finally have a view of her red and tear-streaked face, "And it's all your fault, you're a fucking monster and god ... you don't even know how much I hate you!"

A backhand hit her full in the face, for a moment she saw everything white, she only had time to feel a shift of air about her before a stabbing pain hit her in the skin, Jimin was gripping her hair with such brute force that her head began to throb and burn, she screamed in despair as she was dragged away.

No one in the hallway came out to help her, why would anyone bother, then?

Jimin was in charge there, it was his right to do whatever he wanted with the girls, especially if it was his first choice.

After minutes that seemed interminable, she was thrown inside a room she recognized as her own, indeed, theirs.

"You hate me for that? Oh no, my angel," he shook his head, slamming the door behind him, "I'll give you more reasons to hate me, good reasons," he concluded, beginning to remove his own clothes.

The more skin was shown, the more Y/N feared what was soon to come, Jimin's otherwise perfect arms were littered with ink weaving into thick sinuous lines, heavy tattoos stared at her menacingly when the man's belt also fell to the ground with a thud.

"What are you going to do?" she asked with a trembling upper lip.

Jimin shot her an unfriendly look, brought his hair back in a neck movement that the girl would have found attractive and manly if they were normal boys in an equally normal setting. Instead, she found it threatening and stifled a cry as the man began to unzip his pants.

No. Not again.

"I'll take what's mine, you whored with another man in front of my eyes, this deserves punishment," he replied with deadly calm, he knew things were not like that, he had given her the order after all, but he enjoyed provoking her, the girl tried to retort but Jimin was quicker, "Do you know why I stopped him before he finished?"

Y/N didn't know what to answer, she just watched fearfully as the boy shed all his clothing, he was completely naked. His cock stood straight and swollen, Jimin ran a thumb over the turgid tip and moved closer and closer to her, who curled in on herself.

"Please, I don't want to do this," she cried, but Jimin did not take pity on her.

"Answer me."

"I don't know... I don't know" she shook her head, the young man grabbed her face hard, blocking her.

"I stopped it because the only cum your pretty little mouth is going to swallow is mine," he said firmly in a statement that went against the Dark Moon's own principles, again trapping her head in his firm grip, "Hate me, Y/N, I want to feel how much you do it while your throat is squeezing me," he chuckled viciously, before thrusting unceremoniously into that delicious hot, wet cavern, he closed his eyes biting his lips, the woman moaned and cried with her mouth tight around his girth, swallowing against her will every single inch of the man, until she touched the tip of her nose to the boy's pubes.

Jimin let his moans filled with lust and satisfaction wander around the room, with his hips he pushed deep into Y/N's throat, she threatened to choke on her own spit, long rivulets trickled down her chin, going to soak Jimin's belly closer and closer to her face as the speed of his harsh thrusts increased.

"Aaah... you're better than I thought, tell me the truth... you like being my personal whore, mhh if I touched you... you'd be wet, right?" he asked cruelly, Y/N shook her head forcefully, she was tired, her jaw ached and that bastard's cock kept pulsing and swelling without showing any sign of coming, but she felt it that strange sensation snaking up to her lower abdomen, making her legs tighten to her horror.

She really was Jimin's personal whore.

That realization made her feel disgust for herself.

A grip on her hair more fierce than the others caused her to lift her shiny red eyes to those of her "boss."

The man's hard and cold expression did not match the desperate movement of his hips, "You will swallow every single drop of my cum and afterwards you will lick my cock until it is completely clean, because that's how my whores do it," he grunted giving increasingly frantic and violent thrusts, the girl only wished that this torture would end as soon as possible, she was in such a devastated state of mind that she would follow his every single order to get him away from her, so she nodded weakly as she met the first hot spurt, the muscles of her throat contracted around the cock, throwing down every single drop, just as she was ordered to do.

Jimin's chest swelled in satisfied pride, seeing her there, her cheeks swollen with his cum devastated him in a way he would have struggled to admit out loud.

He released her mouth and finally Y/N was able to take a long breath of air, before the man once again crushed her face against his swollen cock, ever more humiliated she stuck out her tongue, beginning to give small licks along his still stiff length, collected seminal fluid mixed with her own saliva, Jimin's ever-deepening sighs intensified, breaking into a moan at the small suction on the soft, veined skin.

The grip on her hair softened and soon Jimin let her go, Y/N abandoned herself in the clean sheets, her vacant gaze fixed on the ceiling.

"Open your legs, sweetheart," he ordered, and in the girl's mind flashed the thought of resisting him, of not giving in to him. But what would that decision bring? Only pain, so much pain both physical and mental.

She opened her legs as ordered, but looked away to prevent herself from seeing that violence.

Jimin grinned, he did not rip off the young woman's underwear as she had imagined, he spat on her belly causing her to shudder in disgust, he pressed his heavy and still hard cock on her moistened skin and began to slide over it with ease, grunting at each savage lunge and at the intense overstimulation he himself was forcing himself to endure.

He squeezed the girl's chin between two fingers, forcing her to watch as he used her body without giving her the same satisfaction, her look filled with anger and disgust was enchanting to the man, who with one last thrust came one more time, soiling both of their bodies with his cum, such was their closeness.

"Are you angry because I didn't smash your tight pussy?" he asked amusedly, sinking his thumb into the woman's lower lip, "I might as well lick your pussy if you would behave well with me, and I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon with such an attitude...think about it, my pleasure could be yours too if you wanted it."

Y/N turned her head abruptly, releasing herself from his grasp with an expression of disgust firmly stamped on her face.

"I couldn't take pleasure with you even if I wanted to, you're a piece of shit," she spat between her teeth, Jimin clenched his jaw before giving her yet another resounding slap that made her swallow the tears she was holding back.

"Careful, I might consider cutting out that bold tongue of yours, you'd be able to suck me off without it anyway," he hissed before abandoning her, just like a whore.

"You put on a show yesterday."

Jin welcomed Jimin into his office in an icy voice.

"Yes? Well, a rat had sneaked into my territory, I couldn't turn a blind eye, I hate rats," he sat confidently across from his friend and business partner.

"Yet Namjoon must have informed you of my intentions regarding that rat."

Jimin clicked his tongue against his teeth, "How long have we been friends, Jin?"

"Jimin, don't take this key with me, it's just business those with-"

"But family is not business!" blurted out the younger man, "I don't care about the whores and new friends you make, because I know you would never screw us over for someone else, which is precisely why I don't understand what went through your mind when you decided to go into business with Choi," he said harshly, Jin maintained a somewhat neutral expression despite the shaking of his clenched fist.

"I meant no disrespect, Jimin," Jin replied more calmly, "Choi Minho is not involved in what happened to you, so I thought it was accessible."

Jimin leaned toward Jin with fury in his eyes, "No Choi from that family is accessible, if you still want me as your business partner, but especially if you still want me as your brother, drop any negotiations with them," he ordered.

Normally Seokjin would not have accepted such a tone from one of his subordinates.

But that was Jimin, one of his closest friends, one of his brothers, and faced with his stormy past with the Choi family, he could only bow his head and look for another way to get into politics.

"I will cut Choi Minho from my list of names," he finally said, Jimin nodded a little more relaxed.

"Thank you, Jin."

"I'm not done," he blocked him before he could get up, "What are you going to do with that girl?"

Jimin glowered at him, "What do you mean?"

"I need to make sure you're not going to cause trouble with other clients, I heard you were quite possessive of her."

"Possessive? Come on, I was just having fun to provoke Minho a little."

Seokjin didn't buy that excuse; Jimin could tease anyone but him.

"If you want her, I'll wrap her up myself with a nice bow and send her home to you, Jimin."

Jimin narrowed his eyes, "And let's hear it, why would you do that?"

"Because you like her."

The pierced boy swallowed, speechless. Yes, he liked her, he had made that clear, but to that extent? Would he have taken Y/N away from the brothel to enjoy her himself?

"You're imagining things, man," he chuckled, Jin raised an eyebrow.

"Is that your last answer?"

#bts #bts fanfic #bts smut #bts x reader #yandere bts #bts yandere smut #yandere bts x reader #jimin x reader #yandere jimin x reader #jimin x you #yandere #jimin fanfic #bts fanfiction

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erinwantstowrite · 1 month

Note

Do you know roughly how much of chapter 15 are gonna be like content warnings or about peters child abuse? I'm trying to avoid as much of the triggering content as I can but I also want to read as much of the chapter as I safely can

If not do you know roughly where in the chapter that content is gonna be?

i will put be putting trigger warnings before the chapter with more detail (because i haven't written a particular scene yet so i don't know the specifics of what i'll need to mention), but i can give a general idea

(this will be below the cut. please take care of yourself. i will be talking about child abuse in many forms. there's four paragraphs, giving a general statement about the content, but will not be going into detail)

it's going to get very heavy. peter alludes to a lot of things he's been through with foster parents. in the first scene, peter has a physical reaction and starts apologizing, dick and wally both reassure him and have a talk about it, so peter will feel safe. peter does not notice that he even has this reaction. but it opens the door to dick having to ask questions so that he DOESN'T accidentally trigger peter, and that's most of the chapter. scene 1, and scene 3/4 (while there's not a break, this scene will feel like 2 different scenes, and the second part is where this is brought up) will be talking about the child abuse with dick, because dick asks about it

peter will not be having flashbacks or going into extreme detail, but he will be talking about it and some of the specifics with dick. he'll talk about the different foster parents he had, he'll talk about just how many people in his life died, he'll talk about the impact that it had on him, etc. he'll also be talking about various forms of child abuse, both physical and mental, from multiple foster parents. but he won't be talking about what westcott did beyond the day that peter ran away. peter is not ready to talk about the SA, so he won't be doing so. there will be a fic in the LoF series that delves into that (but again I'll say that I will not be including flashbacks nor describing in detail what happened to him. it will be talked about, peter will be having reactions and working through it, but i do not want to write the actual scene of it happening. and in that fic, which is a while from now, dick will also be talking about his own SA).

And I really, really have to mention that Peter's narration on this topic is unreliable and biased. the way that he views his trauma is not the way that he should, he still has a lot to go with healing from his past. His narration could be triggering because of how he views himself. he thinks that how he went about this was stupid, but no one around peter will think the same. dick will talk to him about this and peter's viewpoint will start to shift. but in the beginning, it's very sad to see

I hope to do this topic justice and in a way that doesn't hurt any of my readers. I have people that will look over this chapter to make sure that I do, but that responsibility falls on me. I value you all and I care about your well being. I get a lot of asks talking about how they can relate to Peter in LoF, and please know that even if I don't respond to these asks (potentially triggering topics) I see you and I hear you. I'm so sorry that you were left behind and hurt. You didn't deserve what happened to you, no one does. You are important and I'm glad you're with us today. Please take care of yourself. If you find that reading chapter 15 will be too much, I understand completely. I will be putting a summary of the chapter on my page to give an overview of what happened but without the details. It will be a clinical transcript of sorts.

#erinwantstowrite #ao3 #ao3 fanfic #leap of faith ao3 #leap of faith catch me if you can #peter parker #dick grayson #trigger warnings #tw child abuse #tw sa mention

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rogersideup · 5 months

Text

｡°✩ ♊︎ The Gemini♊︎ ✩ °｡

Chapter 9

Star Crossed Lover

Series Masterlist

Previous Part: True Romantic Next Part: May 20th

Word Count: 10,607 (I am SO sorry lol)

Warnings: My blog is 18+ only. All minors or blogs without an age in bio will be blocked. Minors DNI. TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of violence, blood, and injury. Allusions and discussion of suicide attempts. Please proceed with caution and and good judgment for your own personal mental health 💞

The drive to your team welcoming at the winery made 45 minutes of highway feel simultaneously far too long yet excruciatingly short.

After what happened in the corridor, you really didn't have much to say. The only words really spoken between you and Steve was you thanking him for getting the car door for you, then him insisting that you played your music.

After a few minutes on the road, Steve stole a few quick glances at you to try and gauge how you were really feeling, but your head was leaned all the way back against the headrest, and your eyes were always either closed or staring absentmindedly on the scenery around you.

He took no offense, in fact, he was glad that you were calm at the very least. Deep down he knew you were always feeling at least a little worse- if not a lot worse than you expressed to anyone. But like always, there was a time and place to address issues. Pulling into a parking spot at the winery and putting his car into park was not the time, nor the place.

Taking a quick peek through his rearview mirror, he could see a few special guests had already arrived, and he could only hope it would help ease the distress you never deserved to have inflicted on you.

Steve turned to you with an empathetic grin tugging at the corners of his lips. "Last chance to run away?"

You turned your head to look at him with a lazy smile, and an unexpected giggle. "I can't run in these shoes."

"If it gets too overwhelming, you know I'll be here. Just tell me, I'll sneak you away for a bit of fresh air." He reminded you.

"You're making me feel like I'm about to be eaten alive" You raised your eyebrow.

Steve shook his head. "No, you're not. I've been on this team for so many years I stopped counting and even I still get overwhelmed by all of them sometimes. Things like this can be a lot even on a perfectly good day."

"I'm guessing I'll relax after a glass of wine or two" You reassured him and yourself. "It'll be like nothing ever happened, nobody even has to know."

That sent red flags raising high in Steve's head. Now he knew for sure you were in worse shape than you were letting on.

"Bug," Steve shot you a serious glare. "You can be sad, it's okay to be sad."

"I'll be sad later." You surrendered. "Right now I'm so happy and honored to be part of such a welcoming and supportive team. We're all going to have a wonderful night, and everything is going to be fine."

"Promise me right now that after this is over you'll cut the bullshit and stop telling me you're fine." Steve held out his pinky to you. All you did was narrow your eyes at him, you knew he could read you like a book far below his intelligence level, and it was equal parts endearing and frustrating. "We both know that's a lie, and we both know there's no reason for you to have to go through any of this alone anymore. We both know this is the beginning of the end of all of your suffering, and should it get worse before it gets better, you have a whole team of people who want to help you and be there for you."

"Fine." With an internal defeat, you wrapped your pinky around his. "I'll be sad later, but only if you get me a glass of wine while I socialize so I don't seem like a bitch for booking it to the bar."

"Great" Steve smiled, shaking your intertwined pinky fingers, locking in the deal. "Pleasure doing business with you."

"This is the worst deal ever." You shook your head with a smile on your face while reaching for the car door handle.

An immediate gasp full of personal offense left Steve faster than you anticipated, and you got ready for the fight you two had nearly every time you got into a car together. "Do not reach for that car door ma'am."

"Twinkles, I have two fully functioning arms and legs. I can open my own car door." You made the same argument you've made a million times before.

"Just because you can, doesn't mean you should." Steve shook his head at you, his face full of disappointment. "Stay right there before I put the child safety lock on the passenger side of the door."

"Logistically, it'll take more time for you to get out, walk around, open my door, wait for me to get out, then close my door than if I were to just get out on my own." You laughed.

“Yeah well, logistically, this reoccurring argument takes a lot of time as well yet you always seem to want to spark it." Steve spoke as he got out of the car, his door closing behind him. Very quickly making his way to you, he opened your door and offered you his arm to help you out. "See, didn't take that long. Look, this is an unpaved parking lot and you're wearing a pretty high heel which means you could've tripped and fallen and broken an ankle, and it would've been all my fault."

"How could you possibly sleep at night?!" You agreed sarcastically as you got out of the car, and he closed the door behind you.

"I never do." Steve noted. "This is why I have insomnia."

"Too many women and too many unpaved parking lots in this world." You agreed, walking with him towards the entrance. "We really need to contact someone about this."

It didn't take long to enter the beautiful outdoor space that was far too big to be reserved just for the team. You immediately felt like you were the main character of a hallmark movie, strings of twinkling lights shined above your head, the grounds were well maintained, full of plants, tables, and even a dreamy gazebo that was also illuminated by strings of lights.

There were candles lit along pathways and atop the standing tables, booths open that served food, and no less than 20 different wine options, and a whole bunch of friendly faces that all started clapping and cheering when you walked in.

Definitely not expecting that much immediate attention, your cheeks widened into a smile and deepened in color before your hands moved up to hide your face. It only took a few moments before you were brave enough to peak through your fingers to recognize faces you didn't quite expect to be there.

All you expected were the avengers that lived in the compound or near by, but to see faces like Thor, Clint, and even that Spider-Kid who definitely was not 21 and was out passed his bedtime was a pleasant surprise.

Another pleasant surprise was the sweet faces of your mom and dad, sister and brother in law, and a handful of your friends from back home.

Your hands dropped from your face and showed off your full toothy smile and pink cheeks that Steve loved so much it made his heart skip a beat.

It nearly dropped out of his chest and deep into his stomach when you turned to him. "Did you invite them?"

"Of course I did" Steve nodded with a cheeky smile. "I wanted you to feel more comfortable, and you deserve to be celebrated by your family too, not just ours."

Much like earlier in the day when he gave you the suit, your arms flew around him fast and tight. It was shorter this time due to the audience, but Steve still loved it nonetheless. "Thank you so much, you're so sweet."

"You're very welcome" Steve smiled. "I'll go get us some wine like I promised, but I do feel like I need to say hello to your family first considering I've been texting them to arrange this. But I'll be quick!"

"I have so many questions" You raised your eyebrow at him.

"Save them for later!" Steve told you while walking straight towards your parents.

With full trust that nothing chaotic would happen in that interaction, you scanned faces once more and realized Bucky and Nat were missing. You knew why, but it made your happy mood deflate again until Thor was the first of the bunch to walk up and introduce himself.

You made your way through Bruce, Carol, and even said hi to Maria Hill regardless of the fact that you worked with her many times before.

Steve did make it to you with a glass of wine in each of his hands between your interactions with people. "Here you go, Bugs. Not quite sure what this wine is but I told the nice girl at the bar you liked white wine so she poured you her favorite."

"You're the best." Your cheers your glass against his.

"Ugh, I know right?" He agreed sarcastically, drinking down a grin with a sip of red.

Your quick interaction with Steve made your family approach you to celebrate, but he definitely wanted you to have your time alone with them so he slipped away just as fast as he came.

Lots of hugs, lots of chatting, then lots of them pushing you away to go hang out with the Avengers.

Somewhere between Peter Parker and more time with Sam, a quick scan of the crowd had you realizing that now the Avengers were co-mingling with your family and friends. Oh, and Bucky and Natasha finally got there 45 minutes into the actual event.

Lost in conversation with Scott Lang about the most recent episode of that one sitcom he so happened to bring up, a pair of forearms wrapped around you from behind.

You pretty much expected it to be anybody but Natasha, but you were pleasantly surprised that she was already so comfortable with you. "Sorry we're late, but Rogers' mess is cleaned up and you'll never see it again. Also, you look hot in that dress."

There was no chance to thank her or apologize for the mess as she quickly galavanted off into the crowd.

Scott was pulled away from you about 10 minutes later, and your glass became empty of wine. Feeling mildly confident at this point that you had at least introduced yourself and greeted everyone there, you felt comfortable enough to go get a refill on your own.

Another heavy pour and you were back out. Conversation flowed a lot easier than expected between the groups you found yourself in. There was always something to talk about, laughter was a common occurrence, but somehow the mess in the corridor kept seeping into your mind no matter how hard you tried to push it down.

Eventually Bucky found his way to you, and somehow the comfort of one of your best friends helped quiet down all of the unnecessary noise in your brain.

In true Bucky fashion, he approached with plenty of food in hand. Setting a full wood fire pizza on the table, he pushed the whole tray towards you.

"You haven't been eating enough for someone at an event with free food" He noted.

"Hello to you too" You grinned, taking down another big gulp of wine.

"Steve told me you were worried about me." Bucky's face softened.

"I'm always worried about you, that's what friends are for." You agreed with Steve's statement.

"You know what that agent said about me tonight is nothing but water off a ducks back." He reassured you. "But what he said about you is what bothered me. That is what I take personally, and that's what I can't let anyone get away with."

You sighed. "What did you do, Buck?"

"Nat fired him, we both got him on some gnarly lists to ensure he's going to have a hard time finding another job." He explained. "I think Steve did enough damage that the dumbass will probably never reproduce, which is probably a blessing to the next generation. We didn't help him up though, he can figure that out himself."

"Don't you think that's a bit harsh?"

"If it was up to me. I wouldn't have left it at just his balls, but I digress" Bucky shrugged. "I'm really happy you're back, Buggy. I've been smiling all day knowing you're here."

"Well for what's it's worth, I'm sorry people have been saying rude things about you because of me, and I'm happy to be here to hopefully get back on the right foot. I missed you and Steve a lot these past couple of months."

"It's not your fault, so I'm not accepting that apology." Bucky denied. "But I will accept a hug because I missed you too."

"Tough crowd." You grinned before wrapping your arms around him and leaving them there for a while.

Then, he started whispering in your ear. "This was a trap I just wanted to gossip in peace"

You let out an uncontrollable laugh, starting to feel the effects the wine had on you. "What's up? What's the gossip?" You tried to whisper back but it was a little hard to get the words quietly past your smile.

"Has Steve kissed you yet?" Bucky asked in a dramatic whisper.

“No, I don't think he ever will." You denied. "But I just got back last night, give him some grace."

"I don't think he will either. He's really scared of you." He agreed with you. "Do you need me to yell at him for that? Or I can just kind've shove your faces together when I find the opportunity?"

He pulled another laugh from you. "No, it's okay. He's scared, he needs to go at his own pace."

"Have you admitted to yourself that you like him yet?"

"Unfortunately you knew that before I did, but yes, and I told him that too."

"Good, good." Bucky started to pull away from the hug, but your wrapped your arms tighter around him.

"Tell me about you and Nat now" You trapped him.

"Well I'm not a scaredy cat like Steve is so... Girlfriend."

You gasped with a smile and pulled back to observe his face. But it was obvious he wasn't lying to you, so you lit up once more. "I'm so happy for you!"

Raising your hand up for a high five, Bucky hit his metal palm against your hand.

From across the winery and under the gazebo, Steve watched this whole interaction between you and Bucky. He was pleasantly surprised when jealousy never rushed through his veins watching the two of you hug.

Thats when Steve realized how secure he felt with you now. He understood now more than ever that you and Bucky were purely platonic, and it was evident in the way you two looked at and touched each other. In fact, he even felt a sense of warmth and happiness watching you two have a secretive conversation that wasn't so slick. Maybe it would've been a little more discreet had you been a bit more sober, but he found it endearing nonetheless. He found himself feeling hopeful that soon enough the three of you really could smooth over the damage and go back to hanging out together, a notion that once felt impossible.

He was even happier when he saw the both of you take a slice of pizza, cheers, then eat together.

After that, he stopped watching. He was so content knowing that Bucky was keeping an eye on you. Maybe that's where he overestimated his false sense of security, because along with the pizza, Bucky brought you another glass of wine which only meant you were feeling sillier and more socially confident by the second.

At some point Steve fell deep into conversation with your dad, they were getting along so well, in fact, he hadn't even noticed that he spent about a whole hour and a half alone under the fairy light illuminated gazebo with him. They also didn't notice that you were getting along with the team so well it's like you were always part of the little family to begin with.

He didn't catch you and your sister flipping each other off from across the venue as often as you could, he didn't see the way you and Peter made a secret handshake, or even when you exchanged phone numbers with Bruce. He missed Sam making you laugh so hard you nearly peed your pants, then you, Nat, and Wanda disappearing to the bathroom for a solid ten minutes then coming back with your lipstick magically perfect again.

He also missed your fourth glass of wine.

But that was pretty obvious when you walked out of the bathroom and into the social event, scanning the intimate crowd to try and spot anyone to engage in conversation.

Thats when you noticed your mom batting her eyelashes and giggling in a one on one conversation with Tony, while your dad was batting his eyelashes and giggling under the gazebo with Steve.

A bit wobbly on your feet, you walked over to them and held onto the wooden entrance as you stepped up. Both of their attention was drawn to you from their spot on a bench.

You squinted your eyes at your dad. "Hello, Father."

"Daughter" He raised an eyebrow at you.

Steve didn't know where this interaction was about to go, so he observed carefully.

"Steve, is this strange man bothering you?" You asked him.

Steve laughed as your dad reached over to you and flicked the side of your head, you remained unfazed. "Not in the slightest."

"She's drunk" Your dad told Steve while covering your ears.

"I'm not drunk, I'm silly and perhaps a bit goofy, but I am not drunk." You grabbed your dad's wrists and pulled his hands off your ears. "My sobriety should be the least of your concerns at the moment."

"Why is that?" Your dad asked.

"Tony Stark is flirting with your wife." You pointed to your mom and Tony.

Steve followed your pointed finger and saw that you were actually right, and that made him laugh. "That's really concerning."

Your dad sighed. "So what? I have to fight Iron Man now? You chose to be a superhero and now I have to fight Iron Man for your own Mother?"

"Get used to it." You stuck your tongue out at him.

He stuck his tongue out right back at you before turning to Steve. "Please excuse me, I need to rescue my wife."

"By all means" Steve agreed.

When your dad walked off and you were alone with Steve, you sat down right next to him and pulled his arm around your shoulders before you closed your eyes and rested your head on him.

You didn't see his smile as he pulled you as close as he could and rubbed the top of your arm. "How are you doing?"

"Cold, tired, feet hurt." You mumbled. "Drunk"

"I thought you said you weren't drunk?" Steve quipped happily.

“Well, you're not my dad so you get to know the truth." You snuggled into him. "More truth, you smell really nice, and I just need to sit here for a little while."

A giggle escaped Steve from your confessions. "Are you having fun?"

"More fun than I thought" You nodded. "I'm so warm and fuzzy inside. It's been so long since I've felt happy like this."

That wiped the smile clean off of Steve's face. "I'm so happy that you're happy. It'll keep getting better, I'll make sure of it."

"I wish it could just be like this all the time." The feelings you never talk about spilling out of your mouth. "Life could be so good, and I really love it sometimes. I just don't know how to not take what other people do to me personally. You and Bucky are so good at that."

"You're good at everything you do, and life is about to get so much better for you, sweet girl. I promise."

"I'm trying really hard to believe you." You smiled. "I probably sound sad, but I'm happy right now. 'M always happy when I'm with you."

"You can stay with me however long you want, I'm happy with you too." He squeezed your shoulder.

"How did you guys plan such an elaborate event when nobody even knew if I would agree to be an avenger or if I would even be back at the compound today?" You asked.

"We used magic and our intuition" He said with a smile.

"You are so magical" Your alcohol influenced mind marveled. "And who in my family have you been communicating with because that's so magical"

"Your sister and your mom" Steve giggled at your question. "Your family is very nice and really fun to be around."

"Did my dad tell you embarrassing stories about me?"

"Surprisingly, no he didn't."

"Good, good. Let's keep it that way."

Closing your eyes, you let the wine and Steve's body heat relax all your muscles and wash the tension away. Unsure of how long you had actually been there, there was a point in which you could feel Steve shift to look at an approaching person.

An uncontrollable laugh escaped your intoxicated mind as whoever Steve was looking at sat on the other side of you and snuggled into your body the same way you were snuggled up to Steve, but for some reason you still didn't want to open your eyes.

"Wow, this is lovely" The voice said. It sounded like Sam, but you couldn't be too sure.

"Hey, I want in on this too" Sounded loudly from far away. Footsteps came running, and Maria plopped onto Sam's lap sideways. She kicked her legs over your and Steve's laps.

Slowly but surely, more Avengers, family and friends ended up under the gazebo with you and Steve. The cuddle pile grew with Scott and Nat, and lasted longer than it probably should've.

You were fed enough food by pretty much everyone while you all drunkenly told stories and laughed so hard that your stomach hurt that you eventually sobered up.

Once you were sober again, you realized just how fast time had flown by and were sad to hug your parents goodbye. You're pretty sure your mom hugged and your dad fist-bumped nearly every single person at the event, but that was neither here nor there.

Eventually everyone said goodbye, and by the time you got back into Steve's car it was already almost midnight. And by the time you got home and into Steve's bed, all of your energy was more than depleted. Social battery was in the negative, but you felt like you had been plugged into a high speed charger when he got under the covers next to you.

"How are you feeling?" That seemed to be everyone's favorite question to ask you.

"I kind've feel like you right now" With your eyes closed, your laid on your back with one arm above your head and the other resting over your hoodie on top of your belly.

Steve giggled "what is that supposed to mean?"

"I feel like I'm going to throw up."

"Any particular reason why?"

"I ate too much, drank too much wine. I'm bloated but happy so it's a small price to pay." You explained.

"Well if you're going to throw up, aim in that direction" Steve smiled and pointed in the opposite direction of himself. "Are you still drunk? Do you need some water?"

"No I'm not, I'm okay" Your smile barely ghosted your lips. "Just need some sleep."

Steve reached over and pulled some blankets over your frame before poking your cheek. "Remember what you promised me earlier?"

Your eyes opened to look at him. "I feel better, really. I do."

Steve sighed. "You don't even want to talk about it?"

"What is there to say?" You questioned. "All the same shit, different day. There's nothing I can do about that anymore."

"When this all first started, you were getting sent to my office nearly every day for fighting back, but tonight you kind've froze up. Why?"

"I wasn't expecting anyone to do that to me when I was with you." You answered. "But it's done now, it's fine."

"We both know it's not done" Steve's face softened. "And avoiding it doesn't make it go away."

"Would you like me to rewind time and kick him in the balls instead?"

"No, I just want you to know you can talk to me." Steve emphasized.

"I'm pissed off." You admitted. "I'm always in a state of being angry that this is the environment that I have to learn to thrive in every day, but I've also reached a state of emotional exhaustion that makes me feel like I have no room left to be even more angry than I already am. I've hit max capacity, so I'm choosing to stay as calm as I can because out of all the kicks and punches I've thrown, none of them have worked before. I have no reason to believe it'll work now."

“It's not fair." Steve huffed like kid.

"It never has been." You agreed with a shrug. "But you don't need to hold onto that anger for me. I'm trying to let go of it and move on."

"I'll let go of my anger in the form of making change." Steve told you, now feeling brave enough to pull you close to him.

You snuggled up close, your head on his bicep and your arm holding him gently. "I'm an avenger now. That's all the change I know how to make at the moment."

"I'm so proud of you" he practically whispered. "But I've never met anyone like you before."

"You really need to work on providing context before sentences that might hurt my feelings"

Steve chuckled at your bluntness. "You're telling me that you're happy, but you're also telling me that you're sad. Both of those statements feel genuine, so I don't really know where your mind is."

"Well then imagine how complex and confusing it is to be me" You emphasized. "Never in my whole life have I felt more alone while also feeling more loved than ever. I'm happy and sad, I just accomplished something most people never will by becoming an avenger yet I've also never felt more like a loser. This is the first time I've ever been relentlessly bullied but it's also the first time I've ever been a superhero so I guess the juxtaposition of my emotions is just turning my brain into scrambled eggs."

"Have you tried compartmentalization?" Steve offered with a grain of salt.

"I tried that once, I think I created too many emotional categories and got overwhelmed." You smiled. "But I'm a Gemini, so these complexities have been written in the stars for me since the moment I was brought onto the earth. I think I was born for the very purpose of the universe testing to see if overwhelming contradictory emotions could physically kill a human being."

"One of my greater purposes in life is to protect people against the things that could kill them, so you're in good hands right now." Steve slowly rubbed your back. "Overwhelm will not be your cause of death. Actually, nothing will be. I'm trying to convince Banner to make clones of us to be kept in cryofreeze that way when we die of old age, new versions of us can just be thawed out so we can be best friends forever."

"Spoken like a true cancer" You laughed, patting his chest. "Did I uphold my end of the promise?"

"We can call it even, but I'll always be concerned"

"Even Stevens!" You sleepily enthused.

"Are you rhyming or was that a reference to something?" You could hear his amusement.

"Both, you're a little too old to understand that one."

"That's really rude" Steve faked offense.

"Thanks for coming to my rescue, Twinkles. I know you think you didn't do much, but it means a lot to me when I know I have someone on my team."

"I'll always be on your team, you've always been worth the fight." Steve reminded you.

Those words comforted you enough to ignore your very full stomach and fall into a deep sleep in the hold of your favorite soldier's big protective arms. Unfortunately the universe loved to hate you, because you only got your share of the superhero until about 4am when his phone started ringing effectively waking both of you up.

A few curse words slipped out of his mouth in complaint before he reached for his phone and answered it. You didn't pay much attention to the phone call itself, but you did find it within your lack of consciousness to move nearly your entire body onto his in attempt to keep him forever. Snuggling into him belly to belly, his hand found the back of your head and played with your hair as you slipped in and out of sleep.

By the time the phone call ended, you had effectively caged him between the mattress and your body. Realizing what you had done, Steve's cheeks burned as he let out a sigh.

"You can't go." You sleepily mumbled.

"You and I both know I don't really have any say in that." Steve reminded you apologetically.

"Says who? We all have free will."

"Unfortunately, the president of the United States. Apparently he requested to meet me for an urgent conversation about something that's happening somewhere." Steve explained.

"Damnit." You yawned. "I think the president has me beat in importance."

"I think the two of you are pretty equal in importance." Steve pondered. "The only difference is that people might die if I don't get out of bed."

"My soul will die if you get up, but it's fine, I understand." You joked dramatically.

"You're making it very hard for me" Steve complained, wrapping his arms around your back and squeezing you gently.

"If you're hard that's all the more reason to stay in bed." You joked, knowing damn well Steve wouldn't take a naughty joke like that very well.

And you were right, because the gasp that left his mouth was immediate and visceral. You didn't need to look at his face to know his cheeks were flushed pink and red hot. Your laugh was also pretty immediate and visceral as he used his body to flip you over onto the bed and propped himself up on his arm to lean over you. Pointing a finger at you like a dog, he had one word to say. "Bad!"

You laughed even harder as he shook his head at you. "I'm going to get up and get ready to meet the president, you stay here and think about what you just said."

Laying in bed alone, Steve eventually came to say goodbye to you. It was always sad to let each other go, but also an often occurrence. But this time he was hesitant to leave, of course you both knew why. Last night wouldn't be a one time event, but he encouraged you to stay close to Bucky, Nat and Sam as often as you could, and emphasized that there would be no timeline to his departure so he didn't know when he would be back. He also made it clear that should you need to defend yourself, you should do so with no hesitation.

Luckily, all was pretty smooth for a while. Your friendship with Nat bloomed faster than you'd ever expect it would, so for the first week Steve was gone the two of you were practically attached at the hip. Nat and Bucky spent a whole day helping you move from your old apartment up into the Avengers sector. Though it felt a bit pointless moving within the same building, the team felt better about keeping a protective eye on you when you weren't floors away from them. It was a nice change of pace to have a sense of community around you again.

The second week that Steve was gone, you tried to focus on building individual friendships with the team members outside of your little social circle. Your therapist also encouraged you to try and be brave enough to walk through the compound with a confident attitude so nobody would fuck with you, so you tried a few times on your own, a few times were nothing more than anxiety inducing, and a few times got you confronted with hostility which lead to 3 more agents getting fired by Natasha.

By the third week you finally got a phone call from Steve. It was nice to hear his voice and catch up and hear about what he had been up to for all this time, and it was especially nice to hear that he was wrapping up his work and he would be home soon. That same day you got to visit Jane and Luca over lunch at one of your favorite restaurants, then they helped you pick out a few new things for your new apartment.

Most kids acted as if a home store was cruel and unusual, but Luca was very opinionated about rugs and throw pillows. He even convinced you to get a new pair of sneakers at the clothing store he wanted to go to across the street from the compound.

Lots of therapy, lots of solo workouts, lots of team building, you were starting to feel mentally and physically stronger.

Strong enough to keep walking alone, and pushing forward no matter how hard it was.

When Steve landed on the runway after 3 whole weeks and a handful of days of being gone, he was so relieved to be back home. Without even making it off the jet he was already fantasizing about shaving the beard he unintentionally grew after forgetting his razor at home, a long shower and a long nap since it was only early in the afternoon and definitely not bedtime yet.

His fantasies continued as he stepped off the jet and into the building. Now he knew he wanted to see you before he knocked out for that nap he desperately needed. There would be some snacks at some point, and definitely no pants after the got out of the shower.

The sound of his boots on the sleek floor actually brought him joy knowing each step was one closer to you.

Like most fantasies, what he hoped and dreamed of was far from reality. Especially when a loud alarm sounded in the sector of the compound he was headed towards.

Stopping in his tracks and cringing at the sound, he waited for the code and location to be called out before springing into action. It could've been as simple as a knocked over vial in the lab, or complex as an invasion of an enemy. But when the code called out for aggressive physical conflict in the gym, Steve's heart sank and he started running as fast as he could.

He didn't want to believe it was you, but he couldn't be naive either. His racing heart and even faster legs carried him there faster than anyone else could. As he entered the doorway into the compound gym, he could hear the footsteps of a few sets of feet trailing behind him, but waiting for others arrival wouldn't slow him down.

Especially not when he entered the gym and it was completely empty besides two people, his heart sank even further when he recognized it was you, and the number on the back of the uniform of the other person was 212. Harvey.

No less than a billion racing thoughts came sped through Steve's mind, and none of the billion came together to form any good ideas. He swore all he saw was a blinding white and all he heard was his own heart beat in his ears as he sprinted through the equipment to get to where the altercation was happening.

The two of you looked like a cartoon before he went into fully protective mode. As he weaved through punching bags and stair climbers, he couldn't pick out where your body started and Harvey's ended. There might as well have been a big dust cloud around you, with puffs of air pluming out.

The consequences of putting himself in the middle of a fight wasn't even a thought in Steve's mind as he jumped over a treadmill and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind and tried to pull you backwards, far away from Harvey.

Unfortunately, you were a little too preoccupied trying to save your own life to notice the alarm was sounding or that anyone was coming to save you, let alone Steve who you didn't even know was home yet. Assuming it was another attacker, one of Harvey's buddies helping him take you down, you forcefully thrashed and kicked yourself out of the Steve's grip. Adrenaline clouded your judgement, flight was nowhere to be seen as fight took over your every thought, you turned around and swung your fist right at him to earn yourself more time to knock Harvey down. You know you made pretty harsh contact considering there was a shooting pain buzzing through your knuckles, but at this point there was pain jolting through nearly every part of your body, so this wasn't going to slow you down.

Still not realizing what you had done, you watched Natasha sprint into the room and full body tackle Harvey to the ground, followed by a few other commanding officers, Sam, and Bucky. Trusting their ability to deal with Harvey and not let him touch you again, you turned back around to deal with whoever else was.

Fist balled, ready for a second swing, you looked up at the targets face, and devastation immediately took over the whole of your emotions. Steve blocked your punch and caught your wrist mid swing.

"Hey hey hey, it's me. It's just me" Steve frantically tried to get you to stop.

"Oh my god" You whispered to yourself as you realized you punched Steve right on his cheekbone, hard enough a bruise was already forming.

He watched you come to the realization of what you had done, your wrist was shaking in his hand, even more so as he loosened his grip and gently placed your arm down to your side.

You looked battered and bruised, but when he looked back at Harvey, it was clear that you had won this fight.

Looking at your wide eyes, he could tell you were in shock, and coming down from the copious amount of adrenaline coursing through your veins. He knew all too well what that felt like. Guilt, shame, the full effects of pain from the injuries sustained, the tremors and how weak your knees and thighs would get. He's been in your position far too many times before, he knew it was the worst feeling in the world.

Especially when your cheek was oozing blood, your arms were scraped up and bruised. Steve could tell the fight started with an unfair advantage.

Then, tears started pooling in your eyes as you looked at Steve's face and you opened your mouth but no words would come out.

"It's okay." Steve told you, very slowly reaching out to put his hands on your shoulders trying to snap your brain out of fight mode. "You're okay."

A tear fell down your cheek and your eyebrows furrowed before you muttered a quiet. "I'm so sorry."

"You didn't know" Steve shook his head. "You were just trying to protect yourself. You're okay, buggy."

You looked over your shoulder and saw Harvey on the ground. His face was a lot bloodier than yours. With eyes swollen shut and his nose definitely not in its usual form, you felt like a monster.

A sob escaped your throat, and your shaky hand flew up to cover your mouth before your eyes squeezed shut. "What did I do?"

"Everything is going to be fine." Steve reminded you, pulling your attention back to him.

His bruised face only made your sobs escape faster and your heart pound even faster. "I'm so sorry, Steve, I-I didn't mean to. I didn't know it was you."

"I know you didn't, you didn't even know I was home." Steve reasoned with you. "It's okay, just take some deep breaths for me."

You shook your head, still panting from the physical exertion. "I can't."

"You can't?" He questioned.

"I have to go." You took a big step backwards, Steve's arms fell back to his sides.

More concern than Steve ever thought was humanly possible took over his mind. "Where do you need to go?"

"I don't know." You sobbed. "I just need to go. I'm sorry"

Another two scared steps backwards, then you bolted out of the gym. Steve started making strides towards you, fully prepared to follow you but Sam approached him and stuck his arm out.

"You have to let her go on her own." Hand flat to Steve's chest, he stopped him. "She needs time to calm down and come to terms with what just happened. Trust that if she needs something, she will call you."

Steve's shoulders deflated. He wanted to go help, convince you to see a medic and have an emergency meeting with your therapist, but he also knew Sam was probably right.

With a big deep breath, Steve assessed the state of the gym. Realizing one of the treadmills was still on and going, he reached over the machine to stop it. Then a few commands slipped through his mouth while trying to organize his own brain.

He needed the security camera footage of the incident, he needed the alarm to stop, he needed a lab clean up crew to get rid of all the blood on the gym floor, and he needed Harvey handcuffed to the hospital bed he was bound to end up in. He was too tired to do any of that on his own, but luckily others were eager to get this taken care of too.

Just as he was no longer needed, Bucky approached and squeezed his shoulder.

"What's that thing on your face?" Bucky's nose scrunched up.

"She got me on accid-"

"I'm not talking about the bruise. I didn't even know you were capable of growing a beard" Bucky commented.

Narrowing his eyes, Steve glared at Bucky. "I forgot my razor."

"Respectfully," Bucky stated looking him up and down. "You look like shit, Pal."

"Thanks, Buck." Steve sarcastically smiled. He knew he looked disheveled and tired.

"Really, I think 66 more years of sleep would look good on you." He backhandedly tapped Steve's chest. "Go take a nap."

"I don't think I'll be able to sleep after she ran off like that." Steve sighed.

"We'll take care of her." Bucky reassured him. "We can always wake you up if need be, but her and Nat have grown really close. She has a lot of people in her court."

After about 10 more minutes of arguing with Bucky, he decided to just let him win under the conditions that he would keep him updated when he found out any new information.

Steve showered, shaved, and put on sweatpants and a shirt before getting into bed. He didn't want to wear pants, but he did it for your sake, just in case you came to find him. Realizing it had been about an hour since the incident, he tried calling you just to see if you would pick up, but he wasn't shocked when you didn't. So he sent you a text letting you know he was here for you when you were ready, then tried his hardest to get his mind to calm down enough to fall asleep.

It took an unfortunately short amount of time, as the second he laid down sleep hit him harder than your fist against his face, and he knocked out for so long that he woke up to the sound of his phone ringing, and it was now pitched black in his bedroom.

"Hello?" Steve mumbled into his phone.

"Jesus Christ, good morning sleeping beauty." Bucky said.

"Weren't you the one who told me to get some sleep?" Steve poked.

"Not important, glad you're back from the dead. I have some updates for you. Are you awake enough to process the words I'm speaking to you"

“I will be once I'm filled with rage over this situation again. What's up?"

"The security footage was recovered and I finally got to see it. It's enough evidence to land Harvey in jail for assault, so that's what Natasha is currently perusing."

Steve sat up in bed and reached for the lamp on the bedside table, blinking his eyes to adjust as it clicked on. "What happened?"

"She was alone in the gym, running on the treadmill and minding her own business. 212 saw her in there on her own, snuck in through the back door and yanked her off the treadmill. Her foot slipped off the end of the machine so he pushed her forward and scraped her face and arms against the moving belt, which is why she was bleeding. He was screaming some things at her but none of it is very clear. He tried kicking her a few times but she was able to get up and try to push him off of her, he persisted and she got fed up after he managed to get a swing at her collar bone and kicked her chin. She just... started swinging at him and didn't stop until you and Nat got them away from each other." Bucky explained.

"If this video can get him in jail, that would be great. But it can't be used if it's incriminating against her. We can't have that happen." Steve sighed.

"If anything, it's proof of self defense. You know Nat would never let anything bad happen to her. None of us would." Bucky reminded Steve. "It looked really painful on her end though. She ended up going to medical, but they released her a couple hours ago. JARVIS is telling me she's hanging out on the roof."

"Think I should go up there?" Steve asked, swinging his legs over the side of the bed, already knowing the answer.

"Well I don't necessarily think she should be alone for much longer."

"I'll talk to you later then."

The call ended and Steve stood in front of the mirror to fix his hair, while trying his hardest to ignore how tender and swollen his cheek was now. Before making it up to the private roof access, Bucky sent him the video and it took everything out of him to not kill Harvey with his own two hands. But a deep breathing exercise helped him regulate his anger again.

When he got up there and made it to the top, he saw you laying beneath the stars on a blanket with your headphones on, quietly crying to yourself and hoping that the moon understood your pain.

You noticed Steve immediately, and took your headphones off before sitting up as he quietly sat down next you. Trying your hardest to be brave, your lip wobbled trying to contain the new wave of emotion you felt. No words needed to be exchanged as you gently reached up and cupped his bruised cheek into your palm. There was a physical pain blossoming in your chest as he wrapped you up into his arms, but butterflies fluttered in his stomach as you let one of your arms keep him close, and your hand stayed over his cheek.

You cried tucked into his neck for a little while as he rubbed your back and simply let you feel your feelings. After a little while he heard your small broken voice.

"I'm so sorry." You apologized again, bravely pulling away and moving your hand to inspect the damage you did to his face. "Are you okay? Does it hurt?"

"It's okay, Bugs. I'm fine. It was a dumb move on my part to grab you like that, if I was you I would've punched me too." Steve responded sincerely, taking in the burn-like scabs on your face down near your jaw. "Are you okay?"

"Could've been a lot worse." You nodded with a sniffle, really trying to convince yourself that you were okay. "I don't remember what happened, it all happened so fast I can't even recall specifics. I got scared and didn't want to hurt anyone else so I ran. I'm still trying to come down from that."

"I saw footage from the security camera, it wasn't good, Bug." Steve broke the news to you softly. "You did what you needed to do, and it was all within reason. There mere fact that you walked away with a few scrapes and bruises is a miracle."

"Did he sneak up on me?" You asked, Steve simply nodded in return with a sympathetic look on his face. "That's what I thought must've happened, that's also probably why I punched you so hard."

"If you need to see the video to help you process, I'll show it to you. But right now, I think it's best to just try and wind down."

In agreement, you made yourself comfortable next to Steve. You sat sideways nearly on his lap, with your legs thrown over his. His arm pulled you into his torso, and you rested your head onto your shoulder. Steve noticed your tiny winces as you adjusted to the new found pain and soreness in your body, but he tried his best to avoid all the spots he knew were injured.

“You saw a doctor right? Is everything okay?" He questioned, genuinely concerned.

You nodded. "Everything is pretty surface level, but apparently being slammed onto some heady gym equipment can bruise a rib."

"Bruised ribs are so painful" Steve's face scrunched up. "You're one tough cookie."

"I'm sorry this is what you came home to after being away for so long."

Steve was looking at you, admiring the way you looked under the moonlight, yet you couldn't keep your eyes off the stars. "I wish you didn't feel the need to apologize for things that aren't your fault."

"I'm working on that, and I don't anymore for most people. But for you? A million apologies wouldn't be enough. You're too sweet for this kind of nonsense."

"You are too, but out of all people you should know that I understand." Steve stressed. "In a lot of ways, we're very similar, Bug. I know what it feels like to be in the position you're in right now. You don't need to explain anything or apologize to me. I get it."

You tried to understand his words, but you really didn't. For a moment, you almost got upset with him for implying that anyone would treat him the way you've been treated around the compound. Steve was one of the most respected people in the world, you could barely earn the respect of a new hire agent. "I don't see anyone rushing to try and physically harm you for going on a run." You wiped tears from under your eyes.

"No, maybe not here." Steve agreed with you. "But way back when I first got the serum, I struggled really hard to earn respect from anyone around me."

"I have to admit, it's hard to imagine anyone disrespecting you."

Steve grinned and carefully brushed a few stray strands of hair away from your eyes. "I went from a 90 pound asthmatic who didn't have the strength to complete one push up to a human science experiment. I proved myself the very moment after I got the serum and it still wasn't enough for a lot of people. Thats why I was paraded around on that USO tour for so long, nobody thought I could handle fighting a war."

"You looked really cute in those booty shorts" you sniffled.

Steve chuckled at your statement. "Stop making me laugh when I'm trying to teach you a valuable lesson."

"I'd rather jump off this roof than not make you laugh" you smiled despite the contradictory tears.

"The point of this conversation is actually to make sure you don't jump off the roof." Steve informed you.

Your eyes moved from the stars to his eyes, they were both as equally beautiful and bright. "Is that what you're worried about? I would never-"

"Quite honestly, yeah, I am." He cautiously continued with a slight nod. "We see a more on a daily basis than anyone should see in their whole life, that alone is grounds for struggle but when you factor in everything else, I don't think that concern is far off."

Your tears fell faster at his statement. As a sad sob slipped past your throat and your eyes found the sky once more, Steve's heart broke knowing he hit the nail on the head. He also knew you wouldn't open up if you felt defensive about it, so he needed to take the scenic route to get you there.

"What's your favorite part about the stars?" Steve asked. "You seem to love looking at the sky when you're sad."

"Looking for constellations helps me stay calm and get out of my head" You explain with a sniffle. "They're hard to see in the city but it's better here upstate."

Steve looked up. "It's amazing to me that you can find constellations. All I see is each individual star."

You pointed at the brightest light. "That's Saturn, and these stars right below it make up the Aquarius constellation."

"It's crazy that the universe is so vast."

"That's another reason why I like the stars so much. With so much happening out there, it's a good reminder that everything down here is so tiny and insignificant in the grand scheme of the universe. Sometimes that makes me feel like I can keep going strong, like one day none of this will even matter."

"You really believe in astrology? I go back and forth. The stars are so far away, I struggle to understand how they can control so much of who we are." Steve pondered.

"I do believe in it." You nodded. "The moon controls our oceans, the tide is physical proof. Our bodies are made up of 60% water, and all of the other elements we're made up of were formed in the stars over the course of billions of years. It's hard for me to believe they don't have a say in what's going on down here."

"I've never thought of it that way." Steve grinned. "It's really magical when you put it like that."

"Maybe you're made up of more stardust than the average human considering your eyes seem to twinkle like they're already up in space." You noted. "It's magical, but it's also equally devastating to feel like the bad parts of your life are written into the stars."

"We need the not so great stuff to help us understand how amazing the good stuff is. Can't see the stars if the sun is out." For some reason, his perspective brought you comfort. It felt like the hug he kept you wrapped up in. "Maybe that's always why I've thought so highly of you. Despite the darkness you've continued to show excellence, and shine brighter than the rest."

"Then maybe I'm a supernova because sometimes I really do feel like I'm going to explode." You giggled at your own realization.

"Even then you'd still shine a million times brighter than the sun!" Steve enthused, big smile on his face. "But don't explode, black holes are terrifying."

"I won't. That's why I came up here. Avengers only access, don't have to worry about anybody else or the damn sprinklers."

"When I was in the Army, drawing was my version of looking at the stars. It was the only way I could really get my mind to quiet down." Steve explained. "Back then, I was miserable. All the army men hated me, I had recently lost my mom, and I thought I killed Bucky. The war was so horrific I didn't think I'd ever be able to recover from what I had to do or what I had to see, and I felt even worse for the innocent lives taken in the whole ordeal. So, when I knew that I could end it... I did."

"You're a hero because of it." You agreed, feeling a bit confused by his words.

"No, you don't understand." Steve denied. "The plane crash that got me stuck in the ice? I could've gotten out. There was a chance for me to jump out of the plane, but I didn't. I didn't see the point."

Your heart sank at the implication of what he was confessing to you, and all it wanted to make you do is just hold him tight and weep forever. But you knew that wasn't the point, you knew you just needed to keep listening.

"I can't say that I regret it, because had that never happened I would've never gotten to enjoy living a life I never imagined, and I would've never met you, or the Avengers." He explained. "But it made my life far more complicated, and at least once a day I imagine what my life would've been like had I just gotten myself to safety, and that imagining- the 'what's ifs?' is something I'd never wish upon anyone. I do know how you feel, and much like you know the moon controls the ocean, I know things will get better. All you need to do is believe it."

Your eyes momentarily squeezed shut to rid them of the tears blurring your vision. They dripped down your cheeks as you shook your head, and his brave vulnerability made you realize that you always loved him, but in this moment you had fully and irrevocably had fallen for him. It was as if there was no more questions in your mind, you couldn't even understand anymore why you hadn't been with him way before this whole mess. It consumed every single one of your emotions, you simply couldn't ignore it anymore.

"I would never, Rogers, never." You confirmed with a cry. "I can't lie, I've been pushed to thinking about it, but it made me realize that I couldn't do that to you, my parents, Luca. Nobody. I love you so much, and I really hate to hear that, but I'm really glad you're here."

"Maybe this is what was written in the stars." Steve reached his hand up and used his thumb to gently swipe tears off your cheeks. "Maybe all of this was meant to happen so that this moment, right now could teach you that no matter what happens, you'll always have people to catch you at the bottom should you feel like you have nowhere else to go."

"Or maybe the lesson is that the idea of our existences happening at the same time is so unlikely that we have no choice but to listen to the universe." You said quietly, almost coming to that realization in real time. "Maybe you were always meant to be mine."

Steve's heart nearly pounded out of his chest as you spoke those words, then, as you looked up at him and closed the distance between your lips, he felt like a supernova too. He was burning hotter and brighter than ever before when your soft lips connected to his, his chest was mere seconds away from exploding when you pulled away to examine his shocked face.

Trying to process what had just happened, the sound of your giggles at his twinkling eyes and blushed cheeks grounded him and pulled him right back down to earth.

"Wait hold on..." Steve clutched his chest.

"Are you going to throw up?" You asked, wiping the last of your tears off your face as your smile took over.

"I think I need to sit down." He stated, finally making eye contact with you.

Your laugh boomed once again. "You're already sitting!"

"Okay, then I need to lay down." He said, readjusting to lay down on your blanket.

Your smile persisted as you laid down next to him. Shoulder to shoulder, arm to arm, your hands intertwined. "This is better than you throwing up."

"Wait..." Steve spoke, looking up at the moon.

You turned your head to look at him. "What?"

"Again" He insisted, turning his head towards you too.

It took a lot of effort to contain your smile enough to kiss him, but you did, and it felt just as right as the first time. Keeping it short and sweet, it didn't take long for Steve to point to the stars.

"I like these bitches, they're being very nice to me right now" He smiled.

Admitting to how hard you laughed at his statement would simply be too embarrassing, but it was hard enough to yell at him for further irritating your bruised rib. "Now you can't get mad at me for calling you Twinkles."

"You can call me whatever you want, Love Bug."

Butterflies in your stomach erupted in flutters at his choice of nickname. "A cancer and a Gemini, who would've thought?"

Steve shrugged. "It works."

"What now?" You asked with a sigh, you didn't know if you were asking Steve or the stars.

"You fight your ass off in a trial against Harvey, you help us out in an investigation on him and everyone that's been tormenting you, you continue doing what you're amazing at, and you keep that beautiful smile on your face because all of this is about to change." Steve explained. "This was the fuel we needed to start a fire around the compound. It's enough to light the whole place up and change the status quo. By the end of it, it's going to improve the lives of every agent in the program, that's my vow to you."

All his words sounded appealing and genuine enough to believe them.

"Pinky promise?" You raised your pinky on the hand that wasn't already holding his.

"Pinky promise" He connected his pinky with yours, then kissed the back of his hand... then your forehead... then your lips.

He knew confidently, now more than ever, that his love for you transcended time and space. The laws of life, love, nature, and even the stars never applied to the connection you two shared.

Maybe it was fate, or maybe it was coincidence that the boy born in 1918 had a chance to fall so deeply in love with a girl who didn't live in the same era as him.

Or maybe everything did happen for a reason. Maybe your life was already mapped out in the stars, and all you had to do was find the right constellations.

You would always have infinite questions about the intricacies of the universe, but out of all the answers you are confident in, you knew two things for certain.

Steve was your North Star. So long as you had him to guide you, you always knew you'd be on the correct path. You'd always get where you needed to go, and he would always be there for you regardless of what season of life you were in.

He was your star crossed lover.

Next Part: May 20th

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