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russellsppttemplates · 10 months

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Papa bear mode (Mick Schumacher)

Mick is in full papa bear mode and his baby girl hasn't arrived yet

Note: english is not my first language. this is another long piece that I hope you enjoy (I love how we all just love dad!Mick and I'm here for it)!

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: pregnancy and postpartum

"Can we go tomorrow, then? I already said that I'd be taking the day off", you said to Mick, passing him the last piece of cutlery so he could put it on the drawer after you dried it, "the meeting was the only thing that I had scheduled and since that is cancelled, I have a free day for that, yes", he smiled, settling his hand around your lower back as he guided you to the living room, sitting on the sofa so you could sit next to him, his iPad on his hand so you could both look at it.

"I think I finally found the buggy for us", he announced, tapping the wide screen and opening the shared document you had created so you could have a set list of what you needed for your baby girl's arrival. Mick wanted to be involved in everything as much as he could, and when you suggested that you'd split the list of items so both of you would have less things to look up and search for, it went down as a good idea.

"This one has an adaptable pushing bit, you can regulate according to the height of the person pushing it so it's comfortable, comes with this thing where you put the nappy bag, and I've checked on your list here", he motioned, splitting the screen so both lists would be showing, "and it fits the bag we have already", he smiled, happy with his finding. You tapped the screen to see all the different pictures and features of the equipment, nodding when it seemed good, "yes, I think this is a good choice. It's good that it's adjustable, means you won't hurt your back because it's to small for you or that I will be uncomfortable because it's too tall for me", you smiled, looking up at him and stealing a kiss, "yes, and it looks sturdy enough to venture out for our walks, too", you mentioned, watching a video where the brand tested how the buggy behaved in different types of ground. You were hoping that once things settled down and you felt comfortable enough, you'd join Mick and Angie for walks as a family of four.

"I also found this crib", you mentioned, tapping the link you had pasted on the document earlier on in the day, "it looks pretty and practical, too", you noted, "she won't sleep on it for a while, I guess, because I've heard everyone say how they just sleep in the cot you put next to the bed for first few weeks", you shrugged your arms, "but at least it will be done and out of the way, and the nursery will be ready", you explained your point of you, earning a nod of agreement from your husband, "seems good to me too. We make a fine team, don't we?", he asked, cuddling you into his chest while you looked at the rest of the items you wanted to get.

The next morning, you both woke up and got ready to move your bodies. While you weren't an athete like your husband, you tried your best to engage in some form of exercise to keep active, usually some stretches and lighter movements now that you were pregnant. And because of that, you had built a nice routine to exercise while Mick did his workout in the morning.

You were tidying up, throwing your towell on the basket so you could later take it to the laundry room and then rolling up your yoga matt, walking to the place where you stored it when you nearly tripped in one of weight machines, "Y/N!", Mick said, approaching you to check how you were, "everything good?", he looked you up and down, Angie following suit as she looked up at you, "I'm fine, just didn't see the corner of it", you smiled, craddling his cheek, "no need to go all papa bear mode, at least not now", you reasoned, "yes, you're right. But maybe we should get those lock things, so baby girl doesn't walk in here and hurts herself, there are some heavy things here", he looked around, "and upstairs too, for that matter", he continued his ramble of everything he thought would be heavy and dangerous in the house, "I'll get to it once we get home from the shop", he finished.

Chuckling, you grabbed Mick's hand and laced it in yours, "there's still a lot of time until those are a concern, my love", you tried to pull him back to reality, "I know, but better be safe than sorry. And don't be so certain than I'm thinking she'll be the one to accidentally hit things, by the looks of it, you'll be too", he teased you, kissing your forehead as you made your way upstairs for a shower before leaving for the baby shopping afternoon.

Arriving at the store, you greeted the older sales assistant, showing her your list of items you wanted to get and following her as she also offered her opinions and views, "yes, I always recommend these cots where little one is right next to you in bed, they're like an extension of your own bed and they can be near the parent for feeds and changes during the night, and especially when the mother is the one getting to them in the night and she's still recovering, it's a lot easier to just roll and have the baby right there", she supported your decision, marking down on her notepad the exact model that would fit your bed, "and can we move it around? Say I want it on my side of the bed instead of hers", Mick asked, "yes, it's fairly easy to move around. This model has wheels that lock into place once you're happy with where it is", she showed the detail on the model they had on display.

After discussing all the furniture, you moved into the aisle concerning the mothers rather than the babies' sections, "again, we can never know for sure how the birth is going to go, but from my own experience and from what the clients tell me, it's better to be prepared for everything rather than run around in the newborn stage trying to buy something", she smiled softly, "we have this kit here, and it comes with nipple cream, which I would recommend you start applying a few days before the birth, a lot of new mothers swear by this trick", she winked, making you look at the product while Mick listened intently.

"Also these witch hazel pads also work wonders, if you lay them on your maternity pads or underwear, they really help cool down the area and make things a little bit less uncomfortable", she continued explaining what all the products did and how to use them to get the most benefits.

By the time you were home, sorting everything took even longer since Mick would not let you carry the bigger boxes, only allowing you to carry some baby clothes, hygiene products and a lamp to the nursery and your shared bedroom, and you couldn't help but notice his tense stance. His shoulders were stiff, he only spoke when you talked to him and the crease on his forehead was prominent. "Hey", you nudged him with your foot under the dinner table, "are you okay? Do you need something?", he asked worriedly, earning a no from you, "I should be the one asking you that. You are awfully quiet since we got home from the store. What happened? Was it something I said or did?", you wondered, receiving a chuckle on his end.

Frowning, you waited for his answer, "sorry, liebling, I don't want to offend you. And no, it's not your fault. I mean, it kind of is because yiu are the one carrying our baby, my baby", he brushed, "you and your body are doing this wonderful thing, like, you're growing organs and bones for our baby girl, you are her home", he smiled, tears filling his eyes before be frowned a bit, "but you're also the one enduring the pains, the discomfort that it is sometimes. You'll have to deal with so many things even after our baby girl is out here with us", he stretched his arm so he could hold your hand in his, his thumb rubbing your knuckles, "it's not fair, and I don't know how to make up to you", he explained.

"What made you feel like this? Was it just today?", you questioned, wanting to know where this whole thing came from, "It's just, today, at the store", he gulped, "the lady kept saying that the things we were getting were because things would be bad, like nipple cream because you'd have cracked skin there, or the witchhazel pads because you would be sore, and the band because sometimes everything would feel off on your body", he said, "and I'll be here for you as much as I can, I'll do anything and I'd do anything to take any of that discomfort away from you, but, it's bothering me, I think that's what it is", he confessed, opening up to you.

Smiling at his thoughtfulness, you tutted so he would look at you, "Mick, my love, it's all part of this. And while maybe, yes, if this was some sort of video game where I could transfer the pain of childbirth to you", you giggled, helping him relax a little bit more, "I'm sure I'll be just fine because I have you by my side, through all of it.

"So, please, stop feeling like you're not doing enough because you are. You're taking care of us, making sure I'm doing everything okay. And I have no doubt that the minute this one is her with us", you brought your laced hands to touch your bump, feeling your daughter kick, "you'll be even more wonderful. Parenthood is not measured by who does more of what, but rather how we handle it all together for the best of our family", you smiled, kissing your husband's lips as you finalised your attempt to make him feel better.

"Do we have to do this now?", you asked your husband, walking inside the home office to see his opening storage boxes, "you're not doing anything, but I need to get these away from here", he pointed to his trophies. His successful career was the first things that came to mind whenever you saw the wall, and now he wanted to store them away, "one day, Rora might think it is a good idea to touch these and what if they fall on her? They're really heavy and they can hurt her", he reasoned as he saw you sat down on the spinning chair, and if your stomach hadn't fluttered as he mentioned your daughter's nickname, your response would be quicker, "those are really high up, Mick, I don't think I can even reach them, let alone a baby or a toddler that, may I remind you, is still some time away from doing that", you noted, only hearing him mumbling something, "and I plan on dedicating every win to you and our little one, so these will soon be filled with new trophies", he smiled charmingly.

"You, little lady", you talked to your bump, "have a very worried and forward thinking papa, and while he can sometimes be a pain in our behind, he only does it because he loves us so much", you tapped the skin, "but we love him even more, so we are all lucky to have eachother, I guess".

"So, I hold her like this?", your husband asked the instructor, earning a pleased nod from her, "very well, Mick, exactly like that!".

You and Mick were at a baby class, and today you were covering the birth and what positions would be helpful whenever the pain of contractions was too great to handle and how you could deal with them, "Am I hurting you, liebling?", he asked, "no, on the contrary. This is actually really nice, I think I should walk around everyday with you like this until she's born", you chuckled, feeling how rhe pressure on your hips subsided, "you know I wouldn't mind being with you all day, you know? It would help me to keep an eye on you at all times an-", you interrupted him, "Papa bear mode is activated", you chuckled, kissing his jaw, "you're lucky I think you're insanely hot when you do that".

#mick schumacher imagine #mick schumacher fanfic #mick schumacher x reader #mick shumacher fluff #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic

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dimepdf · 2 years

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𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐔𝐏 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐘𝐑𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐃. + 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐌𝐀 𝐊𝐎𝐙𝐔𝐌𝐄

masterlist. / taglist. / any request? synopsis. when your high school boyfriend broke your heart and destroyed your sense of self-worth, the last person you expected to mend it was some awkward scrawny gamer and his four-year-old son. video link inspo~

pairing. dlif!kenma kozume x fem!reader

word count. 4.1k

genre and warnings. +18 nsfw under the cut. minors dni, dilf!Kenma, ex!Oikawa, strangers to lovers, pwp, but the plot is holding on by a thread, black-coded reader, fluff, kid fic, cheating, toxic relationship, trust issues, Harue being an Ipad kid, hurt/comfort, clothed sex, biting, spanking, spit as lube, rough sex, light choking, finger sucking, underwear ripping, unprotected sex, creampie, slight nipple play, praise kink, whiny Kenma, slight femdom at the end, mentions of pregnation, domestic vibes, eye contact, not beta'd sorry bae | — first anime piece, feedback is always welcomed & don't forget to reblog 🤍

You and Oikawa had been high school sweethearts up until the second year of college.

You were a headstrong yet deeply hopelessly romantic type of person, the type to wear their heart on their sleeve, which was probably why you had fallen hard and fast for Oikawa’s charming charisma the moment you first met during your first year of high school.

It was also the reason it took you six years to realize your boyfriend had been cheating on you with several different women behind your back since he left for college, and another year to realize he was not going to change after you had to officially let him go.

You discovered that during your relationship, you were constantly competing with other women who were just better than you at holding his attention.

Starting with transferring universities just so that you two could spend more time together, hoping that without the distance, he would pay you more mind or even fully pay the rent to your shared apartment in hopes that maybe, just maybe, he would come back home to you at night.

You had fallen to rock bottom trying to rekindle that light that you two once shared together, holding onto the dearest memories hoping that he would see how hard you were trying to change just to please him.

To no avail, the night you came home early during your lunch break to find him in your bed with another woman had been the final nail in the coffin that buried all hopes of mending your love life.

The first thing you did was kick him out, throwing all of his shit from the balcony window, and leaving him on the curb in nothing but his underwear trying to defend himself. In the same week, you decided it was better to just drop out of college and move back in with your parents, giving up on love completely.

Leaving your bedroom only to go to work or feed yourself, you had settled nicely into the single and bitter lifestyle for merely two years. Becoming an expert at dodging your family's questions that start with that special someone.

You had to admit that you had purposely not been seeking any type of inmate relationship with anyone since your ex. Discovering the still hollowing pit in your stomach seeing pictures of Oikawa seemingly with a new, different , beautiful girl on his Instagram account every month.

You also understood that stalking your ex’s account was everything but the first step to moving on and going through acceptance, but your curiosity would just get the best of you every time you would scroll through your feed and flinch at seeing his posts.

It didn't help that while he was so busy living through his peak in adult life, you were stuck working the night shift, stocking up just to keep your side of the rent afloat.

At the prime age of twenty-one, your life felt so meaningless at the prime age of twenty-one even your parents nagged you about needing to stay out more and for better hobbies that didn't involve staying up for long periods of time with a PS4 controller in your hands.

While most women your age were out doing hot girl shit, you were trying not to get back pain from squatting down to self things. You were lucky enough to get scheduled for the night shifts, only having a minimal amount of customer interactions at the twenty-four-hour Target.

The only people that would step foot inside the store around where you worked were usually guys looking to buy condoms or high school students looking to buy snacks.

The last thing you expected to see walking down your aisle was a lone child taking a look around.

Being in the book aisle, you had half expected the kid to have taken a wrong turn trying to get to the video games section, but to your surprise, the child seemed interested in the arranged literature that was stacked in front of him.

Only being able to reach to the second shelf, standing on the tip of his shoes, reaching for a book, you couldn't help but smile at the adorable sight, side-stepping closer and grabbing it instead to help him.

"Here you go kid," just as you were about to hand the book away you froze at the bold printed title; Wine, Dine and 69 ways to get some: A Locker Room Guide to Scoring with the Beautiful Women of the World. Your smile dropped as your face fell neutral, glancing at the doe-eyed boy that came up to your hip in height in concern.

"Thank you, Unnie," he replied politely, taking the book from your hands with a slight lisp in his voice as his front teeth were missing, not being able to properly pronounce symbols yet still being able to shock you completely in how to handle the situation.

"Don’t you think you're a little too young to be reading something like this?" You ask him with a quirked brow.

The little boy doesn't seem to understand the oddity in his choice of literature, holding out the book with both hands as his eyes scanned over the cover, not fully able to process some of the letters before nodding his head as if he had figured out something.

"Oh, it's not for me, it's for my dad. I’m trying to help him get some." As if it were surprising enough, something about the child openly indicating that his father needed to get laid made you smack your hand over your mouth in the habit of holding back your laughter, struggling to keep your professional adult composer.

"And just where is your dad?" You had just now realized how huge and bright the kid’s eyes were, almost a golden yellow shade as they widened, turning their heads frantically looking around the isle, finally realizing that he was without his guardian.

His lip poked out, his arms crossed with the book between him. You hadn’t got much of the ocussicanal baby fever hype. The need to want a clone of yourself was not really something that you had much in mind since breaking up with Oikawa, ruining your entire perception of growing up and starting a family with some other man.

"What a dick," He spouts harshly, "He left me again." as if it weren't the first time he had to call his father out; you weren't as lucky as the last time out, backing your reaction with a small "oop." passing through your lips before you could stop it.

"How about we go find him before he starts to get worried?" You offer to take his hand and abandon your station, starting to walk down the main aisle towards one of the intercom phones.

You hadn’t even fully made your way up a different section of the store before the kid jerked his hand away, passing by the video game section, his little shoes pattering against the tiled floors before engulfing an older man that was browsing the Nintendo games in a hug. "You said you wouldn't leave me again, you liar."

"I’m not a liar; you're the one who wandered away first." The man’s eyes glance at his son, seemingly unbothered by his frantic state, even grabbing the child by the top of his head and pushing him away to grab another Nintendo controller box from the shelf.

"You're supposed to look for me. What if a bad stranger tries to kidnap me?"

"Bad strangers only kidnap cute kids," he says blandly. The child, taking huge offense to his father's teasing, his dramatic gasp, and head turn, eyeing you in disbelief, made you stiff. Having both of them notice your existence while standing just a few feet away made you stiffer still.

You watch him stiffen up, completely clearing his throat and awkwardly setting aside the controller box before picking it back up once he realized that he needed a new one.

From how easily he turned skittish, you were starting to understand why he needed a bit of help talking to women, to the point where even his son was struggling to find outside advice on how to help his dad score.

That had been your first introduction to the single father, the second time coming around that falling week when you had caught the pair during their day out.

The little boy was chewing his father out in the middle of the GameStop for murdering his Minecraft dog, so in revenge, he made him return the game entirely, claiming to be "scared for life." Then you were able to formally introduce yourself and have since formed a pretty odd relationship with the two boys.

Harue called you almost every day from Kenma’s iPad, just to tell you how his day went or ask if you wanted to come over and play games with him. Much to Kenma’s muttering protest, telling his son how you had more important things to do than come over, much to his surprise, you hadn’t.

During your first visit, you quickly realized how truly loaded Kenma was, meeting Harue outside in the lobby of the penthouse, the kid rambling the entire elevator ride up to the top floor.

It was also around that time that you found out they had been set financially for life because of Kenma’s microcelebrity status as a gaming review channel that harbored around six million subscribers as well as owning a huge percentage of big company stocks.

But despite their being extremely wealthy, the main reason you always came around was that they were genuinely charming because you thought the two had the most entertaining and most positive personalities that you've ever met.

You loved to spend time with the two, enjoying their constant bickering and debates on which game character was better than the other, which fast food place they should order dinner from that day, and even being the middleman on which sports car they should drive just to go to their local game store.

You have also learned that Kenma’s baby momma didn't even claim Harue. The two weren't even together when she showed up on Kenma’s doorstep crying about being a few months pregnant after ghosting him the night after their first date.

Once he had gotten comfortable around you, Kenma was very open about regretting having a one-night stand with the woman, but always made it clear to Harue that he would never change a thing if it meant he would end up being his dad.

As the year continued, you quickly realized the feelings you had for Kenma were more than friendly, and that fucking scared you.

But Harue, being the master matchmaker that he was (along with using his dad’s credit card to purchase dating advice books), would always set up you and Kenma to fall into some scheme that would always leave you two alone and flustered in each other's company until you had gotten tired of the whole awkward talking phase and bit the bullet, leading to a shared confession between you two.

You had to admit it was odd getting back into the dating scene, but you were also a very petty bitch and made it known to everyone that you were practically dating a millionaire.

An evil smirk would always spread across your lips. Oikawa would always be one of the first people to swipe through your Instagram stories of Kenma and you spending the night at a fancy restaurant or view your Tiktok videos of you and Harue failing to attempt some new trend online.

Your lives had changed drastically in just a year of knowing Kenma. Spending another year dating each other felt like a dream waking up next to him every day.

★ . . . !

As you continued to poke and prod at your braids, cursing yourself for thinking the thirty-inch locs were anything but practical for the poor, plain eight-dollar pack of hair scrunchies you had purchased from Target.

Some strands had managed to peek through when you were molding the bun into place on your head with two elastics. No matter how many times you huffed and leaned down, convinced you were going to pass out just trying to tuck them away.

Leaning in closer to the mirror, humming at the sight of your hairstyle, your lips pouting as you tilted your head to the side before your eyes caught sight of your boyfriend through the glass, wanting a second opinion on how you looked.

Swaying towards the bathroom's wide door frame, you gave a small pose that had caught his attention, turning away from the YouTube video that played from the flatscreen mounted across the room.

Kenma’s brow arched in confusion, his eyes gliding down your figure before meeting your eyes once more, expecting him to at least compliment you, your arms failing, gesturing towards your hair. "Does this look?"

"It looks fine." He shrugged his shoulders, his face as neutral as the first day you had first met him.

Since you two had started dating, Kenma’s walk-in closet had gone through a drastic change, his usually neutral color shades expanding to warmer and brighter colors that were still in his comfort zone.

It was like you had become his personal stylist, the way you would have to pick out his outfits for any occasion that was remotely close to formal in any way.

On the night of your anniversary, you had to convince him to take a shower and wear a dark gray sweater vest despite his claims of it making him look like a fucking nerd. You had paired it with a white collar button down that peeked from the bottom and covered the belt of his black slacks.

You could already tell he was itching to remove the layers, already yanking at the neckline of his vest and eyeing his gaming console from across the room.

In addition to trying your best to make the night as perfect as possible, you had to physically peel Harue away from his VR set with the bribe of McDonald's and make him spend the night at one of his friend's house just to secure as much time alone with Kenma as possible.

"Just fine?" you asked once more, earning a side glance from Kenma, his expression now blank as his arms crossed over his chest. You had known him long enough to understand every expression and gesture that the grown man made. You had considered it a curse at this point to be able to understand him so clearly.

"Ah!" you shout, snapping your fingers out towards him as if he were a dog caught doing something wrong. "Fix your face, you're too damn old to be whining about having to go outside." Then, you returned back into the bathroom to examine yourself once more, your fingers flattening the creases in your black cocktail dress as it stuck and shaped all of your curves perfectly.

"Now come make yourself useful and help me zip this please." Your request was quickly followed by a dramatic sigh, Kenma dragging his feet until he approached from behind you, with his hands guiding your hips still in place.

Your eyes rolled as he held eye contact through his thick lashes, teasing by biting into your shoulder. "We don’t have time for you to be kinky right now." With a hitch of your breath, you had managed to distract yourself by rummaging through your jewelry box, eyeing the different assortment of gold and silver necklaces that you thought would work well with the low cut of your dress.

Kenma didn't seem to mind your distaste, only continuing to trail small kisses up your neck, your thighs pressing together, his hand wandering down to the plump of your ass, winding his hand back and smacking it with an open palm as if he had owned it. "How do you expect me not to act up when you look so good?" he whispered in your ear, recognizing the dark gaze in his eyes.

You ignored it, holding up a single golden hoop earring to see if the design would clash with your dress as Kenma continued to fondle your ass through your dress. "You said I looked fine," you scoffed, smacking his hand away.

Kenma only chuckled, "So fucking fine," his long fingers reaching around to fondle your breast instead of guiding your hips back into his crotch, pushing against his erection. You allowed him to manhandle you into place, only sighing as you were quickly wrapped around his finger, caught in the web of his dorky charm that always left you leaning in for more.

"In fact," he hummed, using the hook of his fingers to drape the straps of your dress down your shoulders. "Let me show you how pretty I think you look." Already he had started to strip you, holding eye contact when his hand pressed against the middle of your back, bending you against the cold marble sink.

His fingers trailed under the hem of the ass, yanking it over your ass, exposing your lace panties, and looking down at you like he had unwrapped the best present ever. With the sound of his belt struggling to get loose, you couldn't help but peek at his fingers eagerly trying to shake loose from the metal belt.

The sound of your chuckling reaction makes him glare up at you, yanking the leather from the belt loops and zipping his pants to release his cock, his fingers making quick work of your lace thumb, tracing over the material against your clit before hooking them to the side and tearing them. "My bad," he says half-heartedly.

"I’ll buy you another pair." Spitting in his hand and lathering his length in a mix of your wet arousal thrusting himself against your lips with a breathy sigh.

His hand reaches out to grab around the front of your neck, forcing you to stand with your back pressed against his chest. "I want to see you." He mutters in your ear, a shiver running up your spine as he curved his thumb to tilt your head up to get a better look at your reaction in the mirror.

Your knees are almost bucking into the counter, smacking a hand against the surface to keep yourself from falling forward from the feeling of his fingers spreading apart your lips to press his cock inside of you with little to no ease.

His pace started off mercifully, as with every thrust you chased after the feeling of being stuffed so fully, "so pretty ___," Kenma sighs, his fingers pushing past your lips and into your mouth, your tongue instantly wrapping around the digit as his rhythm sped up into deeper strokes.

The squelching noises and the sound of skin on skin echo through the bathroom. Every thrust Kenma had to hold as you felt light-headed every time the head of his cock would rub against the spot that made all your muscles feel like jelly.

Practically an expert at knowing every nook and cranny of your body, "Ken, just like that–" you whine around his finger. He only replied in a low hum, his eyes focused on your body, entirely convinced that he had known your body more than you did from the way he would leave you feeling dizzy and your legs wobbling from an orgasm.

His hands let you go free as you slumped against the counter in the new position. Kenma raises your thigh up by the hook of your knee to angle himself inside deeper, his fingers leaving an indent in the plush of your skin.

Even before you two were comfortable with having sex, he would always be too touchy. His fingers played with the bud of your nipples, grinding against you while spooning and even forcing you to crawl into his lap whenever you made out.

Much to Harue’s disgust, he walked in many times just trying to find where you had run off to, only to see his dad with his tongue down your throat.

To Harue’s luck, you had a strict "no sex while the kid is around" rule to keep any embarrassing and potentially scary childhood memories from forming at a young age.

But you had somehow gotten the worst end of the stick. His son seemed to have gotten the same homebody trait when he was always stuck in the home office with his private tutor.

After he had completed all his work, he never seemed to show any interest in leaving the comfort of his gaming setup. Kenma was left high and dry, usually for weeks until Harue’s friends would invite him over. Kenma suspected that their partners had caught on to his suffering and were practically throwing his son out when they came to pick him up.

He would always make up for the time that you two would spend alone together, eating you out to the point where you had been begging to take a break from how sensitive your cunt was, or making it a goal to fuck on every surface around the house that he possibly could.

"Shit," Kenma yanked the material of your dress away from your ass, his fingers spreading you apart to get the mouthwatering view of his cock sucked in, his length covered in a creamy white coat from your arousal.

His controlled pace makes your thigh tremble, "you look so gorgeous like this angel." His compliments were almost tormenting from the way he had fucked even the gel from your edges, grasping onto your hips tightly as if you’d turn into putty and slip away if he weren't too careful.

"I’m so close," you plead as mascara-covered tears stream down your cheeks, the tightening feeling building in your gut.

The pleasure was unbearable as Kenma made it a point to fuck you like you were a personal sex doll custom made just for him to ruin. His name is constant on the tip of your tongue, moaning and gasping it like it was your favorite word.

Your legs were wobbly like you had just figured out how to use them, planting them both back on the floor, leaning into Kenma’s front, too preoccupied with being fucked stupid to care about how your hips were smashing into the edge of the sink with every thrust.

It wouldn't be the first time Kenma had been the reason you would find questionable bruises on your body in the morning.

Your cunt clenched at the disheveled sight of Kenma who had been completely pussy drunk, his normally pale skin now flushed a light pink hue.

His eyes squeezed tightly shut, with his canine teeth pointing from his lips as he bit in your shoulder to keep himself from whimpering out your name every time your pussy clenched around him so desperately.

Leaning in and grabbing his chin to place a kiss on his mouth, like your lips were a reward. Kenma’s tongue was already poking from his mouth into yours. His fingers naturally gravitated towards your chest, as if he had found comfort in playing with your hardened nipples.

As his thumbs ran across your hardened buds, you shivered, your cunt clenching around him in response."You make me feel so good, baby," His hands gripped tightly against your torso.

His nails dug lightly into your skin, chasing his high, nuzzling his forehead against the back of your neck as he choked on the moan that threatened to pass from his throat.

"I wanna see your face, Ken-ken," you say, even with him plowing into you. You had still managed to sound so demanding.

Kenma was quick to melt into the little obedient boyfriend that he was, revealing his hazel eyes that glistened from the threat of shredding tears from how pussy drunk he felt. "Gonna cum in me, huh—ah, wanna get me all knocked up, pretty boy?" The praise affected him as expected, and Kenma grimaced at it, even ducking his head away as if turning away would be enough to hide his flushed reaction.

With the courage of a racing horse, he had delivered one more smack against your ass, which you thought was a nice finishing touch, apparently too nice as your end tumbled out of your walls, making his hips stutter, struggling to stay in sight at the sight of your orgasm.

The marble countertops were only being used to stabilize you as Kenma tugged out of you and released you on your backside with a low grunt.

There was a moment where clarity had settled in pulling away from his hands that groped at your ass. "I can’t believe your socially awkward ass just fucked me to get out of going to dinner." You hunched over the counter, trying to catch your breath as Kenma wiped your behind clean with a piece of tissue.

next part.

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purplealmonds · 2 months

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I watched the Mononoke Zashikiwarashi stage play!!

I watched the performances on 03/29 and 03/30, and I have so many Thoughts. But I’m on vacation and haven’t the spoons to draft them up coherently until I return home in a few days.

For now, I'll do a photo/art dump of my experience.

I arrived a few hours early to the theater (I had to take the train from Kyoto to Osaka, and built in time for potential navigational incompetence). While I waited for the theater to open up, cracked open my iPad and started painting in Procreate.

This is the exterior of Cool Japan Park Osaka's WW Hall. Shaking off a lot of rust from painting from observation, but I'm happy with how the colors came out.

Photo for reference, though I painted it live. Shadows moved quite a bit while I worked because I am slow.

This is the interior of the theater. I was forbidden from taking photo and video of this space, so I painted it it, albeit messily because of the short time I had before the performance began.

Winding back time a bit, here's the cardboard cutout stand the theater staff set out right before they started admitting people into the lobby:

It was a bit windy that day, so it actually snapped in half mere minutes after its installation lmao. Not pictured is the flustered staff tying Mr. Medicine Seller to the railing with some twine.

Selfie taken after the disaster:

Keeping an eye on Mr. Medicine Seller to ensure he doesn't misbehave agains, prints in hand to be gifted to unsuspecting theater-goers:

When I was seated, some of the giftees stopped by to gift me with an acrylic standee and a cookie! The standee is given exclusively to audience members who preordered their tickets super early, so it's amazing I got my hands on one! After the performance, someone also posted my art on their instagram story! O:

The performance visual, gift shop, and posters were also deployed around this time.

Also was pleasantly surprised to see a huge Mononoke Karakusa poster displayed. Unlike typical movie posters, this one was printed on a rather thick matte rather than thin translucent gloss paper.

And here's the merch and goodies I acquired at the lobby:

I was originally buying just the pamphlet, but as you can see I did a few more impulse purchases! I ended up getting:

📖 Zashikiwarashi Pamphlet - Hoping if productions of other episodes are a thing this can become a collection. The Bakeneko pamphlet was also sold here. If there's interest I can do a flip-through video of both the Bakeneko and Zashikiwarashi pamphlets!

🎟️Mononoke Karakasa Bonus Gifts: I thought it was just the clear file and a neat lil trading card but it seems like the trading card is actually a movie ticket??? I’m not gonna be in Japan when the movie comes out though but it’s a nice souvenir nonetheless!

🌇 Mononoke Karakasa flyer - The theatre had massive stacks of them to be taken freely. The first one got a bit wrinkled on my ride back to the hotel, so I grabbed 2 more after watching the 2nd performance!

💿Bakeneko Blu-Ray - This was something I thought I’d never get my hands as a US resident so I was pleasantly surprised they were selling this. Definitely a pretty penny but now I get to watch it at my leisure when I get home! May do a write up about it eventually. The Zashikiwarashi Blu-Ray actually went on sale today, but it only delivers in Japan. Sighhh. I guess I have no choice but to fly back when the Umi Bozu stageplay goes live. Or if it pops up on Mercari some time in August the price gouging hopefully won't be too horrific.

#mononoke 2007 #mononoke 2024 #モノノ怪 #mononoke #butai mononoke #mononoke karakasa #purplealmonds #blogging #2024

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jocelynscrazyideas · 1 month

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Love Me the way You love Her | Jack Hughes x Reader

warning: language, door slamming, breakup, emotional distress. Cheating?

Summary: Jack and y/n go through an argument. Jack has a past with getting with y/ns bsf. Eva- always there for y/n basckstabs.

A:N- I’m scared that this wont make sense.. anyway here!! First Jack blurb! And it’s an emotional angst!!

── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──

I’m driving back to my apartment. It’s about 11:27 and it’s pitch black. Stars are shining in the night sky. The moon is out, glistening, telling me to finish my work.

Jack is out clubbing, well as I thought. I think he’s out partying with some other skank, and the other devils won’t tell me about it. I’m done. I know it’s just a stereotype thing about hockey guys paying with women, but I’m serious.

I packed a few bags from jacks house that he shared with Luke. I took all of my clothes, my phone charger, my computer, camera, iPad, and all of the charging cords for them and followed by a few blankets and hair straighteners and other hot tools. I packed all of my 103 pairs of shoes. I made sure nothing I cared about was left at the stupid bulging I called home.

I took my pictures I had of me and Jack off the walls and threw them in the ground. I left the place with glass in the wood planks on the ground and the pictures of me and the Hughes family sitting there, waiting to be noticed.

Luke is out with Jack, and I know Jack is out with some girl named Eva. I’m so tired of being parinoid, so I checked his location.

Jack told me he was out at the pizza place with the boys. Boys as in John, Dawson, Luke, Jesper, Nate, and Jonas. I know for sure that John, Luke and Nate are true.

I texted Jonas asking if Jack was with him, he responded with a plain answer, “no. Sorry.” I know Jonas knows what Jack is up to, so I texted him again,

Where is he then.

I’m not sure, you’d have to ask him.

That’s a lie, I know you guys talk at practice, just tell me. I want to ask him to get me some food when he comes home, but he won’t answer my texts and calls.

Okay, I’ll let him know.

And that’s it. So I texted John. I know John can’t lie to me, so I asked him thorough questions.

Where are you?

At the club, Jack and I are heading out to the bar soon.

Is Luke with you guys?

Yes, and so is Bratter, and Bash.

Okay, thx.

Np, but you want me to deliver a message to Jack?

No.

Great, so not only did Jack lie to me, but so did Luke. I pull into my aprtament complex’s parking garage. I park in my signature parking spot and I lock my doors as I hop out.

I don’t have the energy to carry all four bags back into my room so o carry only two. I bring in my important stuff, my clothes and my electronics.

I set my things down so I can unlock my door on the 7th floor. I know it’s going to be empty, cold, dark, and un crowded. Unfortunately, I moved all of my stuff into Jacks place, stupid idea.

Before Eva cut into my relationship with Jack, Jack and I lasted about 4 years. I’m pretty sure I’ll cry in the morning. So I unpack everything now.

12:34

Text from Buba💗:

where are u?!

Answer my text rn.

I’m driving over.

Are you at your apartment?

Just text me baby!

Are you dead?

Cmon please?

What did I do!

You smashed our pictures, it’s ok. I’ll clean it up later.

I left him on read, I’m sure as hell not dealing with him. I finish unpacking, and I jump in the shower. Nice warm water, un opened shampoo and conditioner, unused body wash, a brand new loofa. A new tooth brush and toothpaste. Flossing my teeth, a new hairbrush. My makeup, that I forgot to mention… yeah I brought it too but it’s in my car, I thought that I would be too busy crying to do my makeup.

After my night routine, I realized I haven’t eaten, so I cooked up a grilled cheese, it was delicious. I revrushed my teeth and re flossed and I head to bed.

-4:15-

I wake up to pounding on my door.

“Y/N OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!” Jack screams out.

He’ll wake up the neighbors.

I get up from bed, i do t use the lights, i have to make him think im still sleeping, but I crawl on my knees to the door. I look at the crack between the door and the floor, I can see two feet and I know it’s Jack.

“please, baby, I know you’re there. I’m sorry. I don’t know what I did, but I love you.”

“That’s bullshit.” I respond, no time to think. I get up from the ground and I ublock the door. Then, within a second I lock it agin. I don’t want to face him right now. I’m in my safe place, my home.

“No it’s not.” Jack says I can hear his guilt in his voice. He knows what he did.

“Eva.” I say as my voice trails off, I can’t help it. I hit my back against the door and I slide down to my butt. My knees up against my chest as I warp my legs in my arms. I sit there against my door, and my used to be love of my life on the other side. I feel my eyes burning, my throat starts to close. I look up at the ceiling light and back down to my red toenails. I start to cry, actually not crying, but bawling.

I cant breathe, it hurts to know my lungs taht I used to catch my breath after going on runs with Jack are being ised.

I can’t stop crying, because I know I didn’t have to cry when I was with Jack.

“I think we should break up.” I maanage to get out from my croaky voice.

I feel Jack put his fist down from the door and he slides down to the same position I’m sitting in. His head agisnt mine, but on the other side.

I hide my head in my knees as I cry, and cry.

“I love you. I really do.” Jack says as he cry’s as well. I can hear him sniffle.

“no, this is the last time i want to hear your voice.” I say, and I get up and slam my bathroom door, letting him know I’m not at the front door of my apartment.

“Please, y/n, stay.”

“This is the last time I’m asking you this, this is the last time. Jack you broke my heart before and I’m not letting it happen again.” I cried out. My tears all over my green tank top, and my pink silky pajama shorts.

“Please.” Jack bellows out, I need him to know if he loves me he’ll let me leave.

Last time he hurt me, I found out he was at a bar dancing with a girl name Sarah, but Sarah was my best friend.

“I’m hurt, Jack just go.”

“It’ll be fixed right? I mean we’ve been through this before! We can fix this!” Jack plead through the door, I can hear the pain in his voice, the hurt in his chest. But i need to rember that he hurt me, and it’s happen before, this was his second as his only chance to fix it.

“no. Jack you got Eva. Go hang out with her.” I cry out. U throw his favorite picture of us together under the door.

It’s a picture of us at the Hoboken Fair. I’m in his arms, his head resting on mine. We both are cheesing, his smile goes end to end, mine is so big you can see my dimples disappear. My eyes in so much love, his eyes set on the camera, I can tell he loves me. I’m dressed in a blue hoodie, that was reeking of jacks cologne, and my shorts were halara skorts.

loved.

It was never love, it was a story that he made up.

He passed under my favorite picture of us.

I was wearing low rise jeans, the ones that go under your belly button, and sit on your hips. I was wearing a small belt, and it had hearts on the pockets that covered my ass. My shirt was a cropped black leather tube top, and I had a really cute shoulder bag on, and Jack was an accessory that clung to my left side. I had my black heels boots on with red bottoms.

Jack was wearing a white striped button down Hawaiian style shirt that was in buttoned and he showed of his abs. Hes wearing my favorite shorts on him, his Nike woven flow shorts in black. He has his favorite white air forces on.

His hair was at his natural curly state, and mine was on a blowout, with curls in a tight half up half down, on top I had braids and I had blue sunglasses that matched Jacks hat.

“You miss our music festies?” Jack asks in a heartbroken tone.

“I’m serious Jack. We need to break up.”

“No. We can fix it.”

“No we can’t.”

“I’ll change, baby I can’t lose you.” Jack harmonized with the deep sound of my fridge.

Jack gets up, his shadow his taller. The door gets heavier, I stand up from my countertop that sits right next to my door.

“I knew you didn’t leave. You do that all the time”

“Jack, I’m not your girl anymore.”

“fine.”

I check the under the door. His shadow is gone, his shoes aren’t at my door. I open the dorr, check if it’s okay for me to sneak out.

Perfect.

I grab my electronics, my clothes, hairbrush, toothbrush, and my shower products. I head to my car. I sit in my drivers seat thinking if a safe place.

Last time this happened, John housed me. This time it’s different.

Jack and I broke up this time. I give my apartment an email:

To whom this may concern,

I’m sad to inform you that I am no longer in need of your rentable service. Room 179 on the 7th wing will be open for a new service. I’ll gather my things, what’s left may be used for the next, or be stored, if not needed you may contact me at (your number).

Sincerly,

Y/n Y/l/n

I already packed everything, I just need to grab my- actually I have everything. So I drive off and I remembered I left the keys at the front desk before I left. So I truly checked out.

-12:15 PM-

It’s been two days since I left my apartment, I have found myself at my bestfriends house, Liz

Jack called me.

“Where have you been?”

“Home.”

“No, your home, is at my house that Luke and I share. It’s your home, you have a bed, a shower, a kitchen, and you have someone who loved you.”

“No, Jack we broke up. It’s not your problem anymore.”

Why did I even answer. I’m over him, I need to heal, it’s for me to be happy. I hear a knock on Liz’s door so I open up.

“Y/N! Please!” Jack says as I open Liz’s front door.

“Go away.”

“Please”

“How did you find me?”

“I know you.”

“No, no you don’t.”

I shut the door and I go on my phone to block his number. I delete I’m his contact, and I unfollow him on Instagram, TikTok, and I un add him on Snapchat. I left him loose. He’s gone.

the last time ill ever feel him pain me.

“I just wish you loved me the way you love her!!” I scream at the door knowing Jack is still standing there. Again, I cry.

“I broke it off with Eva!” Jack says, trying to make me consider being with him again.

I rember the photo that Jack loves, the one of us at the fair. Eva took that photo. He wasn’t staring at me, he was staring at the camera- or so I thought. He was actually looking at Eva.

My favorite picture, us at the music festival, who took the oicture? Eva did, the pretty ashy blonde Eva.

“no, it’s always been Eva. I just seriously wish you loved me the way you loved her.”

#jocelynscrazyideas #hockey #nhl #jack hughes #jack rowden Hughes #nhl fic #hockey blurb #breakup #cheating #jack hughes x reader #emotional angst #🍇🍇🍇#Spotify

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hangmansgbaby · 8 months

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Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

MAATHP Masterlist

2 : Y O U N E E D T O C A L M D O W N

Getting called into the president’s office is never a good thing. Getting called into your father’s office is never a good thing. But when the president is your father and the PR manager AND Secret Service escort you to his office, you know that you royally fucked up this time, but Meri would never let her father know that she knew that.

“Hi daddy!” Meredith smiles innocently when she enters the Oval Office.

“Sit.” Meri drops into the couch immediately, waiting for her father to look up from his desk. He’s reading on Bernie’s iPad and Meri just has a feeling that he’s looking at the article published this morning about her. “Sweetheart, you know that I love you.”

“Well, I love you too.” Meri replies, smiling, hoping he’ll ignore the news of her outburst.

“But what in God’s name were you thinking!” His volume makes her smile falter. “I have been on the phone all day with the King of England because you decided to scream at the heir to the throne! Have you lost your mind?”

“Well I can explain–”

“Oh you are going to explain. And you’ll explain until your face turns blue about how they took this… this…” Pete groans before he continues, “this disagreement, out of context and you two are actually great friends.”

“But…”

“No buts.” He glares, and Meri immediately stops talking. “You are going to be on the next flight to London. Today! And you better fix this.”

“Yes sir.” Meri sighs as he dismisses her.

“Miss Mitchell, welcome back to Kensington Palace.” Bob Floyd greets Meri as she exits the car.

“It's great to see you, Bob.” Meri smiles politely. “Where is the prince?” She questions, moving to help the driver unload her bags.

“Jake’s running a little behind today.”

“As usual.” She groaned, turning back to the prince’s best friend and courtier. “Then I will be going to my room and if the prince decides he wants to show up for his affairs then I will gladly make an appearance.”

“I expect nothing less from you, Meri.” Bob laughs, leading her to the guest wing.

“Oh, Nat is going to be joining me next week.”

“Did I hear something about Natasha?”

“Meri, you remember Javy Machado?” Bob reintroduces him.

“Yes, the self proclaimed best friend to the heir who has an unhealthy obsession with my best friend.” Meri replies sarcastically as she shake Javy’s hand.

“Oh look is the little Miss Americana who can have any man and still acts like a hoe.” Javy laughs, unable to keep up in their usual game.

“It's great to see you, Jav. And yes, Nat’s going to be here next week, maybe ask her out this time?” The American asks, dropping her bags to the couch in the room.

Javy groans and drops to the bed.

Natasha Trace and Javy Machado have bounced around the idea of being a couple for all of 3 years now. Meredith and Bradley have been telling Nat to just ask him out while Bob and even Jake have been trying to convince Javy to ask her.

“How about you, Meri?” Bob perks up. “Any men catching your eye?”

“No,” She answers simply. “Now shoo. I need a relaxing bath before I deal with your best friend.” Meredith pushes both men out the door, shutting it behind them before making her way to the connected bathroom.

“They’re so going to get married.” Javy laughs, he and Bob walking towards the study where Jake currently resides.

“I don’t know man, she seems pretty set in her feelings about him.”

“About who?” Jake perks up as his friends enter.

“Nothing.” Bob says. “Do you plan on making an appearance with your guest or should I send the reporters home?”

“Interviews are at 3, I have a few hours to enjoy myself.” Jake shrugs, closing the folders he was previously flipping through.

“No, they’re at 1 and you have 45 minutes to change and meet Meri out front for pictures.” Bob corrects. “So please, do not piss her off anymore and just play nice, okay?”

Jake flashes a smirk at Bob’s request as he chuckles. “I’m always nice.”

Every interview that evening started with the same question, “So you two have been friends since her father’s Inauguration Ball?”

Jake laughs at the notion. The two had both met at a charity gala a few weeks after the election and hadn’t even spoken to each other. Then when the inauguration ball came around, Meredith Mitchell told him he could ‘suck his own royal dick’ and to leave her alone.The President did not like hearing her say that.

“We got off to a rocky start, that's for sure. Meri was still new to being center stage in everything and she only knew me as the playboy I’m depicted as online, but by the end of the night we quickly realized we weren’t much different. Plus our dad’s are actually old friends.” Jake answers.

Meri went to answer as well but the reporter quickly asked another question.

“What was your first opinion of the President’s daughter?”

“I thought she was,” Jake paused, glancing over at her as she began to intently listen to what he was saying, “is.. I think she is absolutely beautiful.” He says, eyes never leaving hers. “She has the most amazing laugh, and her smile, well it’s infectious really.”

“Have you ever thought of being anything more with her, your highness?”

“Do you plan on asking me any questions while you're here?” Meri interrupts, turning away from Jake’s stare.

“Excuse me, I was speaking to the prince.”

“No, you were just ignoring me. Do you have any questions for me in your little journal?” The reporter stutters as he flips through the pages. “We’re done here.” Meredith stands and walks to the door.

“But I still have questions!”

“Ask me one question about anything but my outfit, diet, or workout plan and I will actually take you seriously.” Meri glares at the reporter who sits stunned. “Exactly, I’m leaving.”

“Hey Meri, wait up!” Jake follows after her.

Meredith storms through Kensington Palace mumbling to herself. Jake silently follows behind her, patiently waiting for her to stop.

Meri couldn’t believe the audacity the reporter had to ignore her and surely every other reporter took her comments and scrapped them as soon as they left.

“No good, son of a bitch.”

“Hey Meri?”

“Shut up.” She growls, throwing open the door to her room.

“Meri…”

“I said shut up!” She screams, facing the prince. “You don’t get it do you?”

“He was just asking some questions. I don’t see the big deal.” He shrugs, leaning against the doorway.

“Big… I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that.”

“Well Meri? What do you want me to think? You yelled at the poor guy for asking a question.”

“To the world I’m nothing more than a girl on a pedestal. Who designed my dress, what makeup brands am I wearing, what kind of diet of rabbit food am I on! It's the same thing every time!” Meri explains to Jake. She’d gotten used to the misogyny over the years but it still irks her to the bone. “And then, that reporter asks if we’d be more than friends, I’m just some piece of arm candy aren't I?”

“No! Meri you are so much more than the bullshit questions people ask you.” Jake defends. “If anyone doesn’t see that then they’re an idiot.”

“Like you know shit about me.” She brushes off his comments. After all, in Meredith’s mind, Prince Jake doesn’t care about her, or any girl. Never has, never will.

“People can change, Meri. Especially when people believe they can’t.”

Taglist : @mayhemmanaged @sarahsmi13s @kmc1989 @dempy @atarmychick007 @sarahjoestewy-blog @fangirlvibez @princess76179 @averyhotchner @multifandomgirl-us @lynnevanss @beautifulandvoid @djs8891 @imaginecrushes @els-marvelvsp @daisydaisygoose @missymisha @ems-alexandra @rogersbarnesxx @good-night-starlight

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captainnameless · 29 days

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the pic of carlos congratulating lando is so little lando coded. he loves when people run their fingers through his curls and head scratches are so calming for him.

can you write about his caregivers making sure his curls look nice and styling them and everything? i cant decide if he would love it or hate it lol

the answer is definitely both lol, very much depending on Lando’s mood. for now i’ll share some thoughts on a “he hates it” situation

Daniel knows it going to be a rough morning when Lando refuses breakfast, and the shower he needs to take happens under mild threat. Lando’s grouchy, which amplifies his headspace really, when Daniel had kind of counted of guiding Lando out of it while they got ready for the day.

He’s packing Lando a protein bar and some fruit for when he’ll eventually get hungry enough to want to eat, something he knows bigger Lando will at least be grateful for, all there’s left to do is making him look presentable.

Appropriate clothes had managed to be put on after Lando’s shower, but Daniel hadn’t gotten to his hair yet. He makes his way over to where Lando is curled up on the couch, eyes glued on an episode of Bluey on the iPad, a little bit of grace from Daniel’s side when Lando’s behavior this morning usually would not have resulted in screen time.

“Danny do your hair, okay?” Daniel says, moving behind Lando and twisting off the cap off the tub of curl cream, setting it down on the backrest of the couch and dipping his fingers in.

“Nooo.” Lando whines absentmindedly, eyes not coming off the iPad, shoulders scrunching up.

“Danny’ll be quick.” Daniel soothes, knowing full well Lando will appreciate it when they undoubtedly run into fans today that want pictures and starts running his fingers through Lando’s hair.

There’s another whine and Lando blindly elbows behind him, getting the cream and sending it flying. The tub falls off without the lid and cream flies onto the carpet and onto the walls.

Daniel’s sharp gasp gets Lando’s attention enough to pull him from the screen and watch the scene unfold, eyes growing big. “I-”

Daniel groans, moves around to take the iPad and instruct Lando to stay where he is seated. It earns him a whine but an unimpressed look shuts Lando up.

Daniel returns with a toilet paper roll and makes Lando help him clean everything up to the best of their abilities, hopes the cleaning staff for the hotel will have better supplies to clean the rest.

Lando’s on the verge of tears when they finish and the first sob rolls out of him when Daniel starts pulling him towards the chair in the corner of the room, voicing his protest.

“Shh.” Daniel soothes, hopes it calms Lando slightly when he sits down himself and pulls the younger into his lap, letting Lando bury his snotty face into his T-shirt, accepting another wardrobe change. “Let’s both calm down a little.”

He knows Lando didn’t mean to make a mess, there was no malicious intent so he feels it unfair to punish, even if his behavior this morning had been less than desirable.

“You’re ok.” Daniel soothes, running his hands up and down Lando’s back. “You’re not in trouble, bubby.”

It’s a minute or two before Lando’s tears stop, reduce to sniffles and a whimpered out apology that Daniel accepts easily.

Daniel presses a kiss to Lando’s face, wipes at the tears and runs his fingers through Lando’s semi styled hair after. “All this over some cream, hm?”

Lando pouts, buries his face back in Daniel’s chest with a sigh and Daniel pulls out his phone to text Blake he’s going to be late.

#littlef1adventures #lf1a.minific

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sencubussubs · 5 months

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Let’s talk VISION BOARDS

hi lovelies <3

I am a little late to the start of the year but let’s talk VISION BOARDS!

oh my gosh i LOVE vision boards. Every. Single. Thing. i put on my vision board last year manifested - and boy i was NOT good at manifesting (i was overthinking, spiralling, constantly dipping out of believing in manifesting and myself.)

Low effort and loads of fun i absolutely recommend vision boards.

I mentioned in a previous post that part of how vision boards work is by familiarising your brain with seeing the people/places/objects etc on your vision board and partly with emotions! feeling like its all yours now.

So, how can we put an effective vision board together?

Well first, what do you want your year to look like?

your vision board can be for any amount of time, but i think year long ones are most common <3 (it doesn’t mean the manifestations will take a whole year!)

You can start with a pen and paper (or notes app) and write down what you want the next year to look like:

It may help to have some headings to organise sections of life. for example:

Career

Relationships

Travel

Experiences/ events

Material Goods

Then you can find specific people/places/things you want to manifest such as a specific career, car or ipad. A specific type of love language e.t.c.

Second lets get some useful apps:

- Pinterest (of course!)

- Picsart (or any photo collaging app or website)

(OR ALTERNATIVELY you can print out individual photos, cut, organise and glue down your photos on a piece of cardstock/paper or poster board- the world is your oyster baby!)

Apps in tow we can move onto the Third step

finding good pictures!

In my vision board from 2023 i didn’t think too hard about pictures - i found pictures that represented what i wanted, i whacked em where i thought they looked good, printed that baby out and slapped it next too my desk where i looked at it all the time. Not purposefully because i took the time to, but rather just because i would automatically be pulled to look at the bright colours whenever i went to sit down at my desk (and when i would die in my games and need to look away from my screen :P ).

While deciding to do a vision board for 2024 -only during this process did i check my 2023 vision board and realise everything manifested- i watched lots of youtube videos from people whose vision boards were successful. it gave me motivation and enthusiasm to make my vision board and i learned a couple handy tricks along the way:

due to my copy and paste not working on tumblr for some reason, i am going to list the youtubers at the end rather than linking them.

- Using pictures from YOUR point of view

select pictures where it looks like you are already in it - e.g. wanting to read loads in 2024? pictures of someone (with your skin tone) reading with the book in their lap (example pics at the end)

You can also take this further and cut out your own face and put it over people in pictures - sounds silly but it worked for Tam Kaur! (check her out)

- Find pictures that truly invoke the emotions you want to feel

want to be given flowers? don’t settle for any picture of someone giving flowers, find the one that makes you feel the way you feel when you imagine it happening. The one that makes it feel real and heartwarming.

- Make sure you enjoy looking at the pictures/ layout you use!

you are gonna look at this and ingest it subconsciously all the time, so make sure it looks nice! Hopefully the emotions you feel from the pictures will already help this - but we wanna make sure the underlying subconscious message is “this is all already mine” not “oh god i hate this thing”

- Putting it somewhere you often look

if you’re like me, you might not have a manifestation routine and don’t want to consciously decide to spend five minutes staring at the vision board. I placed the vision board next to my desk and schedule, i looked at it every time i sat down - especially because i liked the photos so much it always caught my eye - and whenever i looked away from my screen. This allowed me to subconsciously familiarise myself with all the people/places/things on there! I also had a wallpaper on my phone with another small vision board so i looked at it even more often :)

- lastly, your vision board is yours - you don’t have to share

Honestly i truly believe in keeping my manifestations to myself till after they materialise in the 3D, mostly because of the stress of having other people think you’re crazy - i know that this is also my fault due to everyone is you pushed out, but i feel like for a lot of baby manifesters this is a familiar feeling. Manifestation is your own journey - do not let anyone take away your belief or chip at your self concept!

I am going to make a post soon about addressing people asking about manifestations! <3

Final step: HAVE FUN

Enjoy the process and embody the version of yourself who is receiving all of this, It is done, this IS your 2024!

the list:

Here are all the youtubers whose videos i watched while creating my vision board for 2024 <3

- Tam Kaur

- Anila Sita 101

- Hailey gamba

- The Gem Goddess

I hope this helped and enjoy making your vision board!

bye lovelies!

Seeing people’s successes really motivates me so i might also make a post on the things i successfully manifested in 2023 with my vision board <3

#sencubus #loa #law of assumption #loassumption #loassblog #vision boards #successful vision boards #manifesting #manifestation #manifestation technique #manifestation techniques #manifestation methods #law of assumption techniques #law of assumption blog #mood boards #vision board #vision board 2024 #affirmations #neville goddard

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alaraxia · 11 months

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I'm being Really Normal about Fallen Hero rn but my ipads charging so I can't draw and I need to keep this momentum going, so anyway stream of consciousness on (Ricardo) Ortega's fashion (or potential lack thereof depending on interpretations) below the cut with examples.

Is this just an excuse to headcanon outfits I personally like and make y’all read about it? Yes.

So we all joke about Gucci with Ortega because of the escape outfit he brings us, but I'd like to give some thoughts and examples on how I think someone like Ortega—a public figure/celebrity in their late 30s with access to stylists—would potentially dress.

First issue: most Gucci rn is just not it. Now that's extremely subjective because they do have some pieces that are pretty nice, but this is my post and I can say what I want. In general modern Gucci and the logomania resurgence of the 2010s and sorta more public recognizability of the brand in my mind hasn't done it any favors, and unless it’s very much his personal taste I don’t think a styling team would put him in it.

This is not to say logomania doesn't have extremely interesting and important roots in streetwear and fashion, but for the purposes of how I picture Ricardo to dress I don't think his stylists would go that route, and I think anything he does choose out of his own volition wouldn't align with a lot of their current offerings (and him not being into fashion, only into things that are expensive and pretty, definitely would not have him be into vintage Gucci). If anything it can also be justified by the stylists pushing him away from obvious logo usage due to being a representative of the U.S. Gov, etc.

Though he definitely has at least one full Gucci tracksuit because he's just Like That.

So this was mostly inspired by seeing some styles from stoffa's new stuff so I'm pretty much just pulling fit pics from there (current and older) that I could see Ricardo in that move his fashion beyond say just more stylish button ups and chino lookin pants. If you’re looking for insightful analysis on why I picked these, there really isn’t any, this is vibes I get from him and personal taste while taking climate and cost into account. Not going to consider more casual gym wear or undercover looks in this, he definitely has them and wears them a lot but this is more “he’s being styled”.

First off: expensive, very casual

Not much to say here, just if he’s got a fashion budget and stylists to point him in the right direction I could see him in these more put together but still very expensive casual looks.

Second: Still comfortable but more fashionable for daily wear

These are things I could see him in for just day to day outside of the office, I think he would favor a lot of lighter airy fabrics and colors (though I wish I was better with color because I think he’d have a bit more than what’s represented in these)

Third: dressing up, but in a very laid back and confident way, not for things like the gala but for nicer parties or fancy drinks.

Something a bit more modern and comfortable than just a traditional suit, think going out/filmed interview looks.

For both these kind of looks and even the fashionable daily wear I think he would definitely accessories with very expensive mechanical watches and other expensive belts, which may be where he tries to throw in Gucci (in accessories moreso).

Anyway that’s it, all subjective and my personal fashion biases, etc. All that being said he would definitely own this stupid Gucci jacket too.

#woe fashion opinions be upon ye #fallen hero #ricardo ortega #text #would love to draw him in more of these looks but it's hard to translate some of these to art and have them read well unless I practice more #since it's hard to represent something being expensive but casual #fhr

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grace-lost-in-space · 8 months

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Update/My Mom/*CW* Abuse

Hi you guys. I know it has been a long time since I have been on here. I have a lot of dm’s but there is no way I can get to every single one of them so I just want to do an update. Please know I am so thankful for every single person on here who has messaged or commented. Sometimes I think you guys are all I really have. This has been my platform to use my voice for so many years now.

-first of all I tagged @taylorswift because for the past 13 years she has unknowingly gotten me through the hardest times. There is zero chance she will ever see this but if she does, I want her to know she has helped me stay alive for the past 13 years. This life is so hard.

-my mom is still abusive. My therapist reported bruises on my neck from being choked. DCFS waited almost one week to come out and “look.” Then they said there were no bruises. I said that is because it had been almost a full week. The social worker said “if your mom choked you with enough force, you would still have bruises today.” She asked “why would you want to tell on your mom and lose all this nice stuff you have here (my apartment, my dog, my iPad that I use to communicate). I said because this is how my mom keeps me in this cycle. Then she said well if you’re saying your mom hurt you I have to ask her if she did it. Then I told her no that always makes my life get worse. So she told me then I would have to tell her I lied about the bruises or else she would talk to my mom. So I did. I told her nothing happened and then I said “but I really wish I could tell you the truth.”

-about 7 days later my mom blacked my eye and pushed me into the wall. I went to CB’s (the judge) house right after because she told me come straight there. She took pictures of my eye then. That was a Sunday. The next day I went to DCFS and the secretary took pictures of my eye with her phone. She told me to ask for another meeting with the social worker and ask if she can be there. So I did. The social worker waited one week to call me back and said no, no one else would be there for a meeting and she already closed my case. She said “you don’t have a mark on you” then I said yes I do come right now and you can see it. CB (judge) also took pictures. She said “No Grace I’m not wasting my time. And do you want to have to give up your dog and your apartment and live at a shelter which by the way has long waiting lists just because you’re mad at your mom?” So I hung up on her.

-Candy bar is really mad but she said we can try to get help for me in other ways without going through the state. Right now my biggest thing is money and having enough money to make it until January when I will be moving to a subsidized apartment. And my mom will have no access to me. I am on a waiting list for it.

-I feel so sad. Everything has been so bad. Nothing has changed except my mom is really really hurting me again.

-I need help getting completely free/away from her. If any of you know some ways to do that please tell me because I am scared and I am exhausted and the state is obviously never going to do anything. My mom has too much influence because she knows them.

-I am still really really sick and on disability so my money is a fixed income. I do not really have the option to go out and get a job. I have no savings. I have nothing.

-I just wish this was all one bad bad bad dream.

#cw abuse #abuse #abusive parent #ptsd #taylor swift #taylorlurking #taylorswiftnation #taylor swift nation #taylornation

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lumosinlove · 2 years

Text

April Part One

cw: brief mention of past abuse & anxiety

I wish that when I said your name you would appear

Sitting next to me

The Rangers were already in the playoffs, clinched and waiting to see who they’d face-off against first. It had always made Sirius a little antsy but also a little pleased when they played a team that was already in position. They would be hard to predict. While the Lions fought for their spot—win this game, and they’d be headed towards what would hopefully be another short summer—the Rangers would either be taking it easy, hoping not to have any injuries, or they’d be so high on the thrill that they’d come out harder than ever. Sirius didn’t understand why people bet on hockey. It was a hard game to predict. So much of its balance and beauty sourced straight from the players themselves, energy flowed through from one man to the next. Sirius knew well what sort of toll a break in that system could take.

Now though, Sirius simply dipped around Finn’s stretched wide arms and shot the basketball straight into the hoop.

“Fucking Christ,” Finn panted, cheeks bright pink as he leaned his hands on his knees. “Whatever, man.”

Kota laughed, retrieving the ball and tossing it between his palms. “Your brother’s better than you at this, Harzy, I gotta say.”

Finn pointed at him while Kasey let out a loud laugh. “Don’t ever say that.”

“Oh, man,” Kasey said through his laugh. “I gotta call him right fucking now.”

For a moment, Sirius thought Finn was going to throw Kasey’s phone across the court.

Hannah laughed, too, lifting them hem of her shirt to wipe at her sweat. “If you ever want to rile Finn up bring Alex into the competition. That’s for sure.”

Sirius held his hands out for the ball and grinned. “For sure.”

It was nice, keeping this game running. Sirius found that it got him out of his head, out of the house, and forced him not to spend all of his free time with Remus—something he tended to gravitate towards. Remus would go out with Lily, or Leo and Thomas, and Sirius would text the basketball group chat and throw on his shoes. He loved hockey, and he knew Remus loved him, but even he could admit that he got to be a little much whenever playoffs were potentially coming into the picture. Remus would let him babble, but kiss him on the cheek and ease him in a different direction. Sirius had never had anyone so gentle before, not including Pascal probably.

Still. Sometimes he couldn’t help it.

“So, I’ve been thinking about what we know about Logan,” he began, and he was met by groans—the loudest from Finn.

“I’m not dissecting Logan’s game with you.”

“He’s the opponent now!” Sirius said. “It’s not personal.”

“I’m not saying it is,” Finn flashed his hands for the ball. “I’m just under strict orders from Remus to get you to relax.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Non.”

Finn arched his brows. “Wanna see the text?”

Sirius waved him off. “We have a good opportunity here.”

Finn made a basket. “Nope.”

Sirius’ eyes moved to Kota. “D’accord, fine, let’s talk more about Alex.”

Finn dropped his head back. “This is supposed to be a fun game of funball.”

Hannah snorted. “Funball does not sound like something you do in public.”

“Oh, just play already,” Finn said, though he still seemed out of breath. “I swear to God, if Leo was here we’d have all your asses beat already.”

Sirius watched the garage door close behind him as the car chirped and locked. He inhaled and let out the breath before pushing through the side door, just off the kitchen. He still had moments to marvel at the fact that it actually felt like the kitchen. His kitchen. Their kitchen, the two of them. He could smell something Remus was cooking, or maybe it was takeout, he didn’t care, but Remus was there, inside, waiting for him.

“How was everyone?” Remus asked when Sirius let the door slam behind him. He was at the stove, cooking. There was the iPad beside him, and a game was running—no, not a game. Tape. Remus was cooking dinner and watching game tape at the same time. Sirius was honestly a little turned on.

“Good,” Sirius smiled, coming up behind Remus and settling his hands on his hips. “They told me I needed to relax.” Sirius nosed against his neck, pressing a light kiss there. “But I’m not the one watching tape right now…”

Remus smiled and licked a bit of sauce from his thumb. “Well. We all have our moments. We’re very close to the playoffs, aren’t we?”

“One game away, actually.” Sirius pressed Remus tighter to him.

“I had twenty bucks with Kasey that you tried to talk Logan’s game with Finn.” Remus tapped the spoon against the pot before settling it in the rest. “I’m a rich man.”

Sirius laughed. “True, but it’s not from Kasey’s twenty bucks. Hey.”

Remus tilted his head back against Sirius’ shoulder. “What?”

Sirius pressed a thumb to Remus’ jaw, running it gently along the edge until he reached his bottom lip. “You okay?”

Remus tapped the spoon again. “Of course I am, why?”

He applied gentle pressure until Remus’ head turned and Sirius could kiss him, once again gently, but this time on the lips. “Je t’aime.”

Remus hummed happily. “Fiancé.”

Sirius pressed his mouth against Remus’ cheek. “Husband.”

“Not yet,” Remus laughed.

“Soon. Let’s go right now. Marry me.”

Remus turned in his arms, pressed his hands to Sirius’ cheeks. “My mother would kill me.”

“We’ll have another wedding. We’ll have ten, if you want.”

Remus just stood there, smiling at him, for a long moment. Sirius leaned into his touch, his fingers that had begun gently combing back his hair. Remus pressed a feather-light kiss to his mouth. “A wedding is a celebration. A piece of paper. A law.” He brushed their noses together. “You’re already mine in far more ways than that. So, I don’t need ten weddings.” Remus pressed a harder kiss and laughed. “I need you to taste this sauce and then take me to bed.”

“Oh? Yes, Captain.”

Remus laughed and slapped his chest. “Shut up.”

They ate at the kitchen island counter, iPad between them and shoulders brushing.

“This feels so weird and wrong,” Remus sighed as they watched yet another clip of Logan, clad in blue.

“I know,” Sirius said. “But this is such a big game for us. It could give us the edge we need. Besides, if it makes it better, the Rangers are already in the playoffs. We’re not taking anything away from them and Logan besides a few points that they don’t even need.”

“I know. God, I know, you’re right. But at one point we’ll have to, if we want this. What time’s our flight on Tuesday?”

“Very early. We get into NYC at, like, six in the morning.”

Remus rubbed his eyes. “God. All right.”

Sirius pressed a kiss to his temple. “Sleep on my shoulder the whole way there, mon loup.”

Remus just leaned into him, but his eyes were still on Logan, frozen on their screen. Alex was in the frame, too, behind him, waiting for a pass.

“Gonna be weird for Finn.”

Sirius bit his lip, nodding. “Ouais.”

Logan couldn’t deny that he was counting down the minutes. He knew that the Lions’ plane would be taking off sometime in the early hours of the following morning. Finn had sent him a very chaotic video of him packing his suitcase that consisted of seemingly random clothes being thrown past the camera and into the bag while he shouted “don’t care just coming to see BABY,” while Leo, on the other side of the bed, tossed his own clothes in as if he were shooting baskets on a court. It hadn’t helped how restless he felt. All he wanted was to see them again, and the weeks that had passed had been the slowest of his life. They’d called, FaceTimed, but it wasn’t the same.

“Anyway,” he heard Saint say, and the noises of the Rangers’ locker room faded back into his ears. Tape being ripped off of shins, the clatter of sticks being put back on the rack. “They’re basically about these kids, stuck on this island, looking for a treasure that went down with this ship. Some shady stuff goes on with the parents, people knocking each other around for it. It’s a good couple books, haven’t read the third yet though, it’s not out yet.”

Something about that made Logan look up. Island. Shipwreck.

“The Crucio series?” Logan asked. “The books?”

“Yeah,” Saint nodded from where he was stripping in his stall, then paused in surprise and looked him up and down. “Why, you’ve read them? I’ve never seen you with a book in your hand, Tremblay.”

“Oh. Non, I…” Logan swallowed. He’d almost just explained that no, it wasn’t him, but Finn. Instead, he realized that this moment could mean more, that it was an opportunity. It would be a bit awkward now, the conversation had begun to move on he’d been silent for so long, but he sat back against his stall and spoke through a dry mouth. “Non, but my—boyfriend loves them.”

He didn’t really look at anyone when he said it, but in the brief silence that followed, he forced himself to look up. He caught Saint’s expression first. After all, the reply had been for him. Saint had perhaps paused for a moment, but if he had, Logan hadn’t looked up in time to see it. Saint just nodded with a thumbs up and continued explaining the book’s plot to Luke—who was definitely staring at Logan.

In the end, it was Percy who spoke to Logan first.

“Who…Finn?” It was a small check, a just-making-sure-I’ve-got-this-right. His light eyes were wide, and Will, too, was staring, lips parted around what Logan thought might be a faint smile.

“Ouais,” Logan said, and suppressed a shiver, warm all over. “Finn.”

Percy grinned wide. “God, yes.” He laughed. He and Will shared a look. “I mean, oh, yeah, he never shuts up about books he loves.”

“Sat in OKN’s living room for hours. What was that one series? With the—I don’t know, the zombies? I think he read those, what,” Will shrugged. “How many times do you think?”

Logan knew. “Five.” One of them had been aloud to Logan during that first summer together.

Finally, there was Alex. He didn’t quite look at Logan, but put a hand on his shoulder as he got up, faced ducked low and out of view, and went into the hallway. Logan wasn’t perfectly sure it was an invitation to follow him, but he did anyway. He was flooded with an overwhelming urge to thank Alex, for everything. He’d been a sinking stone more than once in his presence, Finn, too, and Alex had kept them afloat each time.

He turned into the hallway and was hit in the chest by tight arms around him, slapping him on the back.

Alex’s hug was hard and his voice was hoarse. “I can’t say—I’m so—fuck, glad you two pulled through. Jesus—” He laughed breathlessly in Logan’s ear. “That was really hard to watch for a while there.”

Logan wasn’t sure what to say, a lump in his throat, so he tried to think of what Finn would have said. He returned Alex’s hug slowly, then tightly. “Tell me about it.”

Two more pairs of hands appeared on his shoulders.

“Finally.” Will was grinning.

“Finally is right,” Percy said from his other side. “Come on, we’re going for a beer. Yes, right now. Okay, fine, not right now, but we deserve it, okay? You do, we wondered if you were ever going to tell us. Tried to tell you you could, but, y’know. You stubborn fuck. But, really, about Bambi—fucking finally.”

Will slapped Logan’s chest. “Do you know how long we’ve been waiting for this? And then the hockey gods bring us back together and we get to be there for it? Fuck yes.”

“You knew?” Logan said. “You knew. How?”

“Come on, man.” Will shook his head and looked at Percy, putting on a bad imitation of Logan’s accent. “Finn, do you want to, ah—um, hm, study together on the bus? And by study I mean practically spoon?”

Logan covered his face as Alex laughed and joined in.

“Oh yeah, Logan, Tremzy, do you—will you come spend the entire summer with me and sleep in my bedroom on the “floor” instead of the guest room?”

“Should we get breakfast together every day and not invite anyone else?” Percy said.

Will grinned. “Oh, totally, and let’s sneak up to the roof later?”

Before Logan knew it he was laughing, hard. He covered his eyes. “D’accord, stop, stop. Oh my God.”

“And, and of course they way he came charging back into the house looking for you that last time. ‘Course, you had already gone fucking tearing out of OKN after he left.” Percy whistled. “Hard to misunderstand that one.”

Logan smile dropped slowly. Almost like whiplash. He stared between Will and Percy, who was slowly seeming to realize what he’d said. Alex, too, looked stricken.

Percy swallowed. “Not—Fuck. Sorry. That was—like, a hard time for you and—and I’m gonna shut up now.”

“You didn’t…” Will began carefully, shifting on his feet a bit. “You didn’t know he came back for you, huh?”

Percy sighed when Logan shook his head. “Same old Finn and Logan.”

“Quoi?”

“Your love is fucking loud, man,” Percy said. “Always has been. You just weren’t listening to each other.”

Logan smiled, but what Percy had just said was playing over and over again in his mind at full volume. He came back for you he came back for you.

Logan remembered running out of the house. He tried not to remember.

“Like I said,” Percy tapped their temples together. “Same old Finn and Logan.”

“Hm,” Logan said. “Actually, not quite.”

“Oh, no?”

Alex grinned knowingly and Logan smiled back, shoving Percy and Will back towards their locker room doors.

“You know Leo Knut?”

The Gryffindor Lions have made quite the comeback this season. I really don’t think any knowledgable sports fan would have given them a flying chance after the way their year started. Not to mention, with the loss of top forward Logan Tremblay, the months really only got worse for Lions fans. But here they are, led once again into playoff position by Captain Sirius Black. We’ll see where tonight takes us, see if the Lions can pull through against the Rangers.

Sirius admired the ring while Remus was sleeping sometimes. It could cast small multicolored shadows against their headboard, or even Remus’ neck and jaw when his hand was resting on his softly rising and falling chest. Their alarm was set to go off any minute—up at 3:30 for a horribly early flight to New York. Something in him always woke up before alarms. His mind somehow knew it was time, flooding itself with thoughts. Sebastian Montague’s save average, needing Evgeni to go up against Luke Deveaux, Alex O’Hara, not so much like Finn’s playing style, Logan there, favored slap-shots, he would shoot from the blue line, always had—

“Hm,” Remus sighed sleepily as the phone began to ding softly.

Sirius put a hand over his bare chest, rubbing softly until Remus opened his eyes and looked at where Sirius was propped on his elbow, gazing down at him.

“How long have you been awake? No, wait, let me try and guess.”

“Not too long. I just want to get on this plane already, I guess.” He traced a finger down Remus’ chest. “Did you sleep okay?”

“Mm-hm. C’mere.” Remus rolled until he could push Sirius back into the bed and pillows with his weight. He leaned in for a kiss.

“We have to go.”

“Not yet we don’t. I set it a bit early.”

“Quoi?” Sirius asked into his kiss, then watched as Remus pressed his mouth to his chest, then his stomach. “Why? 3:30 wasn’t early enough for you?”

Remus just grinned up at him from where he was kissing his hip, hand easing over Sirius’ half-hard cock. “Needed some time for pre-game rituals.”

Sirius let his head drop back into the pillows.

The airport was quiet and sleepy. Sirius looked around at his team, draped over chairs, Leo with his eyes closed and his head on Finn’s shoulder while Finn, mouth dipped against Leo’s hair, read softly to him from a book. Sirius smiled at the sight. The Cubs had told the team about their approach to going public—and it wasn’t much of an approach at all, not a planned one, at least. The only decision they were making was to hide nothing. None of them would have sat the way Leo and Finn were sitting then, not before. Sirius was happy for them—whatever happened tonight, at least that weight was off of their shoulders—but as he watched Finn pause to press a kiss to Leo’s head, he couldn’t help the old spike of fear, the urge to look around. He knew that he and Remus both still caught themselves doing that sometimes. He didn’t know if he had it in him to do it for the Cubs, too. Someone was going to take a picture sooner or later, he’d said that to Finn, who had only shrugged. So will we. He hoped to God it was as easy as that for them. It deserved to be that easy.

“Here, Cap.”

Sirius looked up to see Thomas holding out his coffee order.

“Merci, T.”

Thomas smiled and nodded at Leo and Finn. “What I wouldn’t do to be in Leo’s position right now.”

“Oh? Didn’t know you liked Finn that much.”

Thomas laughed and sat beside him in the leather gate chairs. “I just mean, you know, with the love of your life. Well, one of them, I guess, speaking as Harzy. Like, I think we can agree they’re soulmates. Jesus Christ.”

“Miss Noelle, huh?”

“Yeah,” Thomas sighed, long and drawn-out. “It’s a weird feeling, you know? Hoping for short summers but wanting to spend time with all the people you love, too.”

Sirius nodded, but he was also silently counting himself lucky. Besides Regulus, who came home on weekends sometimes, he had everyone he cared about right here with him, every single day. He hadn’t thought about that before. He looked to Kasey, who was forced to miss Alex and sometimes Natalie. Finn and Leo, who now would always have some part of themselves waiting to see Logan again. Remus, who loved his parents and his brother, and only got to see them ever so often. Did Pascal wish he had more time to be a father to his children? Probably.

“Cap?” Thomas asked tentatively.

Sirius looked at him. “Oh. Sorry. Sorry, just…that must be so hard. Especially—I mean I am thinking about it a lot this season. We all are.” He glanced at Remus, who was sitting with Layla and Lars, no doubt talking about Layla’s latest test in her PT program. “I don’t know what I would do. Really, I don’t.”

Thomas’ brown eyes went far away as he nodded, but he seemed to realize this and spared Sirius one of his contagious smiles as he took a sip of his coffee. “On a happier note…” He spread his hands, eyebrows raised expectantly. “Wedding plans? C’mon, man, keep me in the loop.”

Sirius laughed. “When would any of us have time to make wedding plans?”

“Center ice wedding? Everyone’s in skates?”

“Jesus Christ, no.”

“You sure?”

“No,” Sirius laughed. “I mean yes, ouais, I’m so sure.”

“Someone could skate down the—”

“Non.”

“Hey guys. That one mine?” Cole sat down on the other side of Sirius.

“What’s up, rookie, here’s your sugar-milk, oh, I’m sorry, I mean frapa-whatever.” Thomas said. “Hey.” He leaned in, knowing look on his face. “Your girl’s staring again.”

Cole groaned, but he was smiling, pressing a hand up to half cover his face. “T, she’s not my girl.”

“Not yet. Y’all are in it to win it. I see it, baby. I can feel it.”

Sirius frowned. “I’m missing something.”

Cole just narrowed his eyes at Thomas and took a conveniently long drink of his coffee.

“Oh,” Sirius said. “Is this about you and Layla?”

Thomas threw his head back and laughed. “See? Even the oblivious Captain Black is aware!”

“Shh.” Cole did look interested, though. “I don’t—we’re not…like, nothing’s happened. It’s probably not even allowed anyway. A PT and a player?”

Sirius blew out a breath, bringing his cup to his lips. “Deja vu.”

“What? Oh. Sorry.”

Sirius shook his head. “Non, it’s fine. Well…do you want something to happen?”

Cole just looked at him.

Thomas snorted. “This is his ‘I’m talking to Sirius Black about my love life’ face.”

Cole threw the cardboard heat-guard around his coffee at him which Thomas caught and put on his Sirius’ head like a crown. Sirius batted it away.

“Boarding, boys,” one of the assistant coaches called, clapping his hands to wake the dosing players. Olli blinked awake like he had been sleeping for years. Leo pried his eyes open across the way and Finn gave his nose a pinch with a laugh.

“Oh, saved by the bell,” Thomas said.

“Shh,” Cole said. “I’m watching you.”

Thomas lowered his voice into a stage-whispered. “Drink your sugar-milk and ask her out.”

“She babysits for Dumo’s kids,” Cole whispered. “If she said no that would be—” Cole made a pained face. “Awkward.”

“Do you prefer awkwardness or regret?”

Cole huffed. “Thomas.”

Sirius couldn’t help but laugh as he stood up. “Boarding, boys. Boarding.”

Even as he walked away he heard a final murmured, “Sugar-milk,” and then a, “Bean water.”

The wired type of exhaustion hit Sirius halfway through the short flight, which wasn’t great because it meant by the time he thought he could have napped, they were getting off the plane. The hotel was nice at least, and Sirius could feel the team’s energy. Maybe it was partly getting to go up against Logan. No doubt, no matter how painful it was, Logan would be filled with the same type of adrenaline.

He and Remus didn’t talk a lot as they threw their bags down at the hotel door. Remus just stretched and then wrapped an arm around Sirius’ waist, pressing up to kiss his cheek.

“Gonna nap,” he said.

“Ouais,” Sirius nodded. “Might get something from the buffet downstairs, then I’ll join you?” He pressed a quick kiss to Remus’ mouth and made sure he had his key card. “I’ll try not to wake you when I come back in.”

“Hey, wait.” Remus wrapped Sirius’ hands up in his own. “Don’t just sit down there and worry. You’ll have all of our tape session for that. All of morning skate, and warm-up, too. Just…”

Sirius smiled and took Remus’ face between his hands. “You know…you’ve been pretty focused on me.”

“So? You’re my fiancé.”

“So, it’s one of your tells.”

Remus made a face, fingers ruffling gently through the hair at the back of Sirius’ neck. “What tell?”

“When you’re worried. You focus on everyone else.” Remus’ smile faltered and Sirius leaned down to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. “It’s why you’re so loved, it’s why you’re an amazing PT, but it’s also something I know about you as the person who, in my opinion…loves you the most.”

Remus was quiet for a long moment, fingers still twisting through Sirius’ hair, then carding it back at his temples. Sirius let him sit with it. He just watched those golden eyes flit between worry and something else, something that he wasn’t saying, as he watched Sirius’ dark strands slip through his fingers.

“What happens if we don’t win tonight?” Remus finally said.

“Then we don’t win.” Sirius swallowed. “Then we finish the season and we have a very long summer.”

“Don’t say that like you’re okay with it. Not for my sake.”

“Re…”

“Don’t—” Remus closed his eyes, let one of his cheeks fall heavier into Sirius’ palm. “Don’t say my name like that, baby.”

“Loup,” Sirius said, but let Remus pull away. “Mon Loup…”

“No, I’m fine.”

“The beginning of the season, you weren’t playing well. Now you’re playing better but you feel like its not enough.”

Remus just looked back at him, as if he were trying to figure out how Sirius already knew. He sat down heavily on the bed, hands going behind him, holding him up. He tilted his head to look up at Sirius, eyes sad.

“You think I don’t know?” Sirius went down on one knee in front of Remus, hands smoothing comfortingly over his knees. “It used to be all I thought. Every second of every day. Doesn’t help that that’s the only question we ever get asked, either.”

Remus groaned and dropped onto his back, bouncing slightly against the mattress. “Fuck.”

The word came out tight with tears, and Sirius just rested his cheek against Remus’ thigh. “What can I do. Hm, baby?”

“I don’t know,” Remus sighed, wiping at his eyes. “Fuck, I don’t know. I’m—I am fine, really. I think it’s like—Logan, too, like it’s just weird and—I forgot what it was like playing against friends. I’m always so focused on Grayback, like, like the—the enemy, you know? And Alex is wonderful, but I don’t mind beating him. I just—it’s Logan, but it’s—me.” He looked down at Sirius. “It’s stupid.”

“Non,” Sirius said, and rose, laying down beside him. “Non, it isn’t.”

“I focus on beating, only now I just want to—win.” He looked at Sirius. “But I’ve already won, look at me. Look what I have? It feels like jinxing to even get that greedy, even if I know that’s what we’re supposed to want. A—you-know-what. S-T-A-N-L-E-Y.”

Sirius couldn’t help but smile. “Sometimes I forget how superstitious you are.”

“Ugh.”

“Pretty sure you’re worse than me.”

Remus laughed a little, too. “It’s exhausting.”

“That’s because us two, we’re not just tying our shoes in a certain order. Look at Thomas. His routines come from time. He puts his right glove on first, he can’t buckle his helmet until the first face off, because he’s been doing that since he was in a child, or in minors.” Sirius leaned in, letting Remus nestle against his arm. “You and I? Non, mon loup, we’re trying to do so much more than that. My routines came from desperation. That’s what Heather taught me. When I was young and I got something wrong, I didn’t get a nice toasted sandwich and a good try.” Sirius tried not to let his eyes go far away, tried to keep the feeling that something was coming towards him, a hand, just out of the corner of his eye, tried not to turn his head and flinch. He just kept his eyes on Remus. “Non. That’s not what I got.”

Remus reached up to lay a hand on Sirius’ cheek, because of course. Of course he could tell. He smoothed it over the hair behind Sirius’ ear as if saying nothing’s there. It’s just me. When he spoke, his voice was quiet. He knew Sirius didn’t like to talk about it. “Is that why you make your honey and toast?”

Sirius pressed a gentle kiss to the sad look on Remus’ face. “There was this kid I used to play with—and I was always in the age group above me, ouais? I was just as good—better, even—but everyone was bigger. And not very nice.” He smiled. “I don’t think you appreciate getting your shots stolen by a seven year old when you’re nine or ten.”

Remus shook his heads. “Kids can be cruel.”

“Ouais,” Sirius said. “But so can adults. There was this one kid, though, named Théo, and sometimes he would give me half of his sandwich. Oh, Loup, it was…” Sirius closed his eyes. “C’est parfait. Perfect, Remus. It was so simple looking back on it now, but do you think my mother was sending me to practice with a perfect, crunchy, sweet sandwich? Non. Protein, Sirius, protein.”

A softer smile had come across Remus face. “Honey. Théo had your sandwich?”

“I have Théo’s.”

“You started making them yourself.”

“When I got out of the house, ouais. No one else was going to. Well—Celeste started making them for me. Don’t think I ever told you how I cried the first time she did. Freaked Adele out. But nothing will ever taste as good as Théo’s when I was seven.”

“What happened to him?”

Sirius sighed. “He…well, he plays in Vegas.”

Remus blinked, then his eyes widened. “Théo as in Théo Angevine?”

“As you would say—yep.”

Remus pushed himself up on an elbow. “Does he know?”

Sirius shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s never given any—hm, sign? Sign that he remembers.”

“Huh,” Remus let himself fall back onto the bed. “Well, I don’t think he’d forget playing with Sirius Black. Haven’t you talked?”

“We saw each other at the award ceremonies my first year, when I got the Calder. But I wasn’t exactly friendly then, was I?”

Remus made a non-committal noise and pulled Sirius closer to him.

“What I was trying to say about me and you,” Sirius said, letting Remus hitch a leg over his hip. He smoothed a palm over the soft material of Remus’ sweatpants, pulled tight around his muscles. “Is that…we’re not the same, our reasons for being the way we are are different, but similar for you, non? Who more than you would want a little bit of control right now?”

“I know but, I just…I thought I had learned to let some of it go,” Remus said. “After my shoulder. Anything can happen and there’s nothing I can do to change that. But…but now I find myself doing all my old little anxious tricks. Just not stepping on some part of the fucking floor and it’s just…”

“I know,” Sirius sighed, and let Remus groan and bury his face in his neck for a moment. “I understand…Re, you were thrown back into a world you never expected to see again.”

“Yeah,” Remus huffed and it was warm against Sirius’ skin. “Yeah, that’s true.”

Sirius bit his lip against a smile after letting them be quiet for a moment, rubbing Remus’ back. “You know what clears my head sometimes?”

Remus pulled back and arched a brow at the daring expression on Sirius’ face. “No…what?”

“Do you want…a pre-game ritual?”

Remus laughed. “Is that what we’re calling it now?”

“Ouais.” Sirius smoothed his hand down Remus’ side. “Really. What can I do, tell me?”

Remus thought for a moment. “If you need food, go, but…maybe we can nap together? I know we usually sleep apart before games, but I kind of just need to…snuggle.”

Sirius just pressed a kiss to his mouth and arranged Remus the way he knew he liked best for a nap—Sirius spooning up against his back.

“I want you more than five Cups,” Sirius whispered against the back of Remus’ neck when his arms were locked firmly around his waist.

“Baby, I love you. But not everyone on the team feels that way. Nor should they. This means a lot to them. To you, too. To me. I just…I don’t know. People still see me as some weird…outlier. Anomaly. I know that.”

“Maybe you have to stop seeing yourself like that.”

Remus only let out a long sigh and pushed harder into Sirius’ chest. “Yeah.”

Sirius pressed a kiss to his shoulder where he knew part of his scar ended. “Rest, mon coeur. Rest.”

Logan checked his phone again and leaned against the wall of the coffee shop he was standing in front of. He knew Gryffindor had made its way to New York early this morning, but he also knew that Finn would be on his way, no matter how tired he was, because Logan had told him to come. He’d planned it. He wanted time with Finn over breakfast, Leo over lunch, both of them at dinner—no matter what happened during the game. It felt right this way.

Suddenly there were hands over his eyes and a voice in his ear, lips brushing his skin.

“Hey, is that star New York Rangers winger Logan Tremblay, can I get an autograph, do you think?”

Logan smiled, almost turned and kissed him right then. “Hm, maybe. But you’ll have to follow him first.”

Finn laughed, dropping his hand to rub gently up and down Logan’s back—a gesture that was all Leo, Logan recognized. He looked up at the coffee shop Logan was standing in front of and made a face. “Look, I love you, but I can get us way better breakfast than this. Like, you should’ve let me take you down to the Village, baby, let me get you something sweet.”

“We’re not getting breakfast,” Logan said. “Not right now at least. After, we’ll get breakfast. Before morning skate.”

Finn looked down at him. He had that purple under his eyes. That damned, gorgeous purple. He was tired from traveling, but Logan was excited to remind him that he and Leo wouldn’t be in the hotel tonight. They’d be with him in his apartment. It could wait, though. This first.

“Okay…” Finn said slowly. “After what? What are we doing here?”

Logan smiled because his plan had worked, and nodded across the street. There, standing tall with its great stone lions and broad stone steps, was the New York Public Library. Finn wouldn’t have looked twice at it, too used to its presence. It had hidden itself in plain sight.

“We’re going to the library,” Logan said as nonchalantly as he could, working on not letting himself smile too much and put his hands in his pockets.

And then, Finn knew. He didn’t try to hide any part of his slow, realizing smile.

“Allez,” Logan said, and headed for the crosswalk.

“Okay,” Finn said softly, and followed him.

They made their way up the steps slowly, taking their time.

“Are you sleeping better now?” Finn asked, and there was a slight tremor in his voice. He was still grinning.

“Sort of,” Logan shrugged. “You? Leo?”

“Sort of. Miss you, though.” There was his hand on Logan’s back again, warm between his shoulder blades, like he just couldn’t quite help himself, but also like he wasn’t sure how far he could go. Logan reached up and stroked his knuckles briefly across his jaw, just to show him it was okay, before they reached the revolving library door. In the reflection of the glass, Logan saw Finn softly smile to himself and touch the spot where Logan’s fingers had been.

Logan found them a table. The chairs weren’t the same, of course, none of it was like it had been at Harvard, but they sat across from each other anyway, just as they always had, and it didn’t take long for them to break into laughter. Finn muffled his with his hands, steepled fingers, brown eyes bright as they darted over Logan’s face.

Logan crossed his arms on the table, leaning in. The ceilings were high, and the other seats were more than half full, people reading, or working with headphones on. Discussing quietly, turning pages, going about their lives.

“Just another first for us, huh?” Finn asked, and mirrored Logan’s position.

They’d sat like this a million times. Logan used to eye Finn’s fingers, always fiddling with something. Now, it was the strings of his sweatshirt. Long, capable fingers, red at the knuckles, nothing like Logan’s. Back then, Logan hadn’t let himself get too close to thinking about taking those hands in his, but the urge flooded him now—and so he did.

“You’re always warm,” Finn smiled down at their hands, eyes looking a little clouded—happy. “Good blood circulation and all that, or whatever. Le’s always cold, you know? Just makes you want to wrap him up.”

“You, too.” Logan held Finn’s fingers between his own.

Finn just smiled. “Nah, you’re just warm. And now you’re getting all quiet on me, making me nervous.”

Logan laughed. “Nervous to kiss me?”

Finn smiled, ducking his head a little, only then his eyebrows pinched together after a moment, and he gave a single, tiny nod.

Logan couldn’t hide how surprised he was. He leaned forward a little more, trying to catch Finn’s eyes again. “Harzy?”

“Not because I don’t want to,” Finn said quietly. “Just—because part of me thought you’d never want to.” His eyes flit up to the ceiling, around the library. “Not here anyway. Not like this.”

Logan kind of hated the word never. Maybe it was only because he had felt it for so long. He knew Finn was right. He hadn’t given any sign until recently that he’d wanted this. He hadn’t been ready, sure, but he hadn’t exactly joined Finn and Leo’s conversations about it. Every time they had brought it up, he’d been right back there at the airport, seeing those invasive pictures of Remus and Sirius. Why had it taken distance for him to want to be close to them like this? Something in him ached because of that.

“I love you, Lo.” Finn said, then too a breath, like the next words took courage. He leaned down and pressed a firm kiss to Logan’s knuckles. “I love everything you are. But you have a habit of backing out on me sometimes.”

Logan closed his eyes for a moment as the words settled over him, but nodded. “I know.”

“I’m not angry,” Finn smiled a little. “I just…I can’t believe we’re here. I can’t believe you…”

“I know,” Logan said. “I—Finn. I know you—you came back for me. When you first left for Gryff.”

Finn’s fingers tightened around his. “You…Did Percy…”

“Ouais. He did, and…” Logan swallowed hard. Words came slowly to him, but, God, at least they came now. And he had Finn’s brown eyes to ease himself into. “This might sound strange, but…thank you. Thank you for coming back for me.” He watched Finn’s eyes fill with tears, watched them glance away, shying away from the memory. “Mon rouge, even if I didn’t know it, and when I didn’t act like anything you did or said would ever make any difference, it did. It all did, and you help me—break the habit. Break into my self. The person I want to be. With Leo and you.”

Logan looked at the necklace around Finn’s neck, his necklace, and the shadows beneath his eyes and the hopeful tilt of his chin.

“I want to kiss you now,” Logan whispered, almost harshly. He moved his hand to Finn’s wrist, thumb over his pulse point. “I want you.”

Finn just closed his eyes, but he was smiling, a pleased quirk of one corner of his mouth. Logan leaned in until their foreheads brushed.

“Tell me that this is okay,” Logan said, because, after that, he needed to hear it.

Finn looked at him. He had tears in his eyes, and he shook his head softly. “Logan. Come here.”

The kiss was gentle. The man sitting a table over turned a page. Someone answered a phone that had been ringing. Logan reached up to cradle Finn’s cheek, ran his thumb over the lilac, delicate skin beneath his eyes, over the high of his cheekbone, and tilted his head to kiss him again.

When they did part, they stayed leaning on their elbows, close.

“Maybe it’s a good thing we didn’t kiss back then,” Finn said quietly and took a curl of Logan’s hair between his fingers, then brushed a thumb over Logan’s full bottom lip. “Not sure I would have ever gotten any homework done.”

Logan smiled. “I would rather kiss you than graduate.”

“Well, that’s kind of my point, Tremblay.”

Logan pushed lightly on the side of the head, mussing his hair more than anything, and Finn just took the new angle it provided and ducked into another kiss, more needy, tongue slipping into Logan’s mouth. Logan felt his cheeks warm, the sheer want he’d been trying to keep in check since parting with them surging to the surface.

“Hm,” Logan laughed as they parted. “We’re in public, O’Hara.”

“Oh, are we?” His next kiss was even dirtier, and Logan just sighed happily and sank into it.

“Hey,” Finn said as they were walking back down the library steps. They were close, edging on touching. “About the voicemail…”

“I deleted it.” Logan looked up at him. “I didn’t listen. You asked me not to.”

Finn blinked. “Oh.”

“But—I’m listening now. Okay? If you ever…” Logan sighed and pressed a kiss to Finn’s shoulder over his jacket, the closest thing in reach.

“Man. You fucking romantic,” Finn laughed, pushing a hand through his hair. “What you got planned for Le?”

“Not telling. I’ll see him this afternoon, after our morning skate and our tape session.”

Finn nodded, still grinning widely. “Fine, fine. God, I can’t wait for tonight.”

Logan groaned. “Don’t talk about it. Time isn’t moving fast enough.”

“Oh, yeah?” Finn threw an arm around Logan’s shoulder. He’d done that a million times, but this felt different. Especially when he leaned in close and let his mouth brush Logan’s jaw as he lowered his voice. “What do you want me and Leo to do to you tonight, baby? What have you been thinkin’ about, huh?”

Logan turned his head up to glare at Finn, their noses brushing. “Shh.”

“One way to make me shh.”

Logan pushed up on his toes to kiss him. He half missed because they were walking, but Finn’s smile was worth it, so was the kiss he pressed to Logan’s cheek.

“This feels good,” he sighed. “This feels so good. Can’t wait for Le, too.”

Logan tilted his head to rest against Finn’s chest. “Ouais. Me too.”

“Cab?” Finn asked, but he looked like he already knew the answer.

“Non, not yet,” Logan said. He reached up and pressed his palm to Finn’s where it dangled over his shoulder. Finn smiled as their fingers laced, as if they’d been meant to do that, waiting, always. The sun, peaking out from a long winter, was warm, and he caught snatches of conversation of the people passing them by. “Let’s walk a bit first.”

“Hey, baby. Just checking in before the game. How are you? You’re probably at morning skate right now, but…yeah! Okay, good luck, you’re gonna crush it—but if you don’t you can come here and crush me, if you want, baby cakes. I’m, like, half kidding. Okay, bye, love you, bye!”

Thomas snorted out a laugh as the message played in his ears, Noelle’s familiar voice. He knew she was stuck at home with a shoulder injury and he could hear the sounds of her stand mixer in the background, along with the television. God, she was probably in those tiny cotton shorts, that hugged her thighs like nothing Thomas had ever seen. Thomas wanted to run his hands down her shoulders, feel the dip of her muscles, the way she liked, move her dark hair to one side and kiss her neck, right near where her fleur-de-lis tattoo was by her ear.

He typed out a quick text: I love you x 3(thousand).

“Okay,” Remus said as he fell down beside him on the exercise matt. “Here’s what I’m thinking for Logan—actually, first, do not tell Sirius we’re having this conversation.”

Thomas snorted as he clicked his phone off. “I was about to say.”

“He think I’m—well, I am in my own head, but we cuddled, I feel better, but also, game time. So.”

Remus began outlining a play, drawing invisible lines around an invisible rink on the matt between them. Thomas was happy to see him like this—it was a big improvement from the beginning of the season—but he was really only half listening. He was mad at himself for it, they needed this game, everything was on the line, but this longing was new.

He hadn’t been in such a serious relationship during his career. There had been other girls, yeah, but none of them called him to wish him luck. They didn’t talk him through making his favorite post-game meal over the phone, even when they were exhausted themselves. Their bodies didn’t sit perfectly between his hands, he would never have done absolutely anything to see them let go completely, and fall apart into him, to take him in and let him fall apart, too, until they were sated and whole.

“Thomas?”

Thomas looked back at Remus. “Yeah. Yeah, sorry.” He sent Remus a sheepish look and held up his phone. “Just—missing Noelle.”

“Hm,” Remus’ eyes turned sympathetic. “In a horny or a sad way?”

Thomas cracked a smile. “Aren’t they sometimes the same thing?”

Remus smiled back. “Unfortunately.”

“What’s this about Cap thinking you’re in your head?”

“Oh, it’s nothing, it’s just—” Remus cut off, narrowed his eyes.

Thomas held up his hands. “What?”

“He says when I’m worried about myself, I focus more on other people.”

Thomas hummed and looked at Remus. Remus looked back. Finally, he cracked the finest of a smile.

“Are we soulmates or something?” Remus repeated Thomas’ words from their first goal together back to him.

“The good, the bad, and the ugly—it would seem so. Hey.”

Remus tilted his head at him.

Thomas reached out to knock him lightly in the shoulder. “You never let us down.”

Remus offered a smile tinged with sadness, and he knocked Thomas’ shoulder back. “You’ll see her soon.”

“Yeah,” Thomas nodded. “It’s just—it’s like I have so much that I’ve ever wanted. Feels shitty to want more.”

Remus had begun nodding halfway through his sentence. “No, yes. Exactly. Fuck, exactly, no, that’s what I said.”

“I just miss her, and I have a Cup—”

“I got him, I just want the C—”

They’d spoken at the same time, and snorted into laughter. Remus groaned and rolled onto his back on the matt just as Finn walked in.

He raised an eyebrow. “What’s going on?”

“Ah, Harzy,” Thomas sighed, leaning back on his hands. “We’re just basking in the love and longing, man.”

Finn just let out a low whistle and lay out a matt beside them. “I don’t need to bask. I’m soaked through with it.”

“Fucking English major.”

Finn pressed the soles of his shoes together, pushing his knees out. He sent Thomas an incredulous look. “You are, too!”

Thomas just held up his hands. He looked to Remus, staring thoughtfully up at the ceiling, and looked back down to his phone where there was a long string of hearts from Noelle. Say hi to my bb bro for me.

“Why’re you—you two are never quiet.” Finn looked between them.

Remus picked his head up and sent Thomas what he knew was a guilty look, and Finn scoffed.

“You were plotting against Logan.”

Remus pushed himself up into a sitting position. “Not Logan. The Rangers. Look, we won’t do it in front of you, but you know we have video review later, right? You’re gonna have to sit through that.”

Finn made a face. “Yeah…”

Thomas laughed. “Your competitive instinct’s kicking back in now, huh?”

Finn raised his chin defiantly. “If I lose to the love of my life, I’m going to perish.”

“Okay there, Harzy. How’s Leo feeling?”

Finn smiled. “Good. He’s meeting Lo now. It’s first kiss day.”

Remus shook his head. “First kiss?”

Finn just turned his smile towards the mat as he switched one leg out to stretch in front of him, then pushed himself up, heading for the treadmills. “First kiss day.”

“Oh yeah? What about you?”

Finn just sent them a peace sign in the mirror as he got the treadmill up to speed. “Already got mine.”

Logan felt pleasantly sore from their morning skate as he waited for Leo outside of the hotel the Lions were staying at. He was also starving, but that could wait. After all of this waiting, the day was going by in a blur. He’d been fierce on the ice, even Coach had said so—maybe even with a little bit of surprise that Logan was in such top form the day he would be going up against his former teammates. He didn’t blame anyone for being wary. He had been wary himself. He’d half expected to wake up this morning filled with dread, but looking back on it now—how could he have? All of his closest friends would be right there. He wouldn’t share their uniform anymore, but they were there—and some of his oldest friends now, too, dressed in his new blue.

He could picture himself walking down the tunnel now and skating out to a roaring Madison Square Garden. He could almost picture standing shoulder-to-shoulder against Finn at a face-off, Sirius and Alex with their sticks raised and waiting to win the puck as soon as the ref dropped it. He could almost picture himself pulling his stick back to slam a puck past Leo’s right shoulder, those blue eyes trained on him through his mask. Almost.

Then the hotel’s double entrance was being pulled open by two doormen and Leo was walking through a little bashfully, wrapped in a light sweater against the April air. He didn’t see Logan immediately, and it gave Logan a chance to just look. He’d hoped for a glimpse of the team during morning skate at MSG, but in the end he hadn’t quite had the courage to go venturing down to the visitor’s locker room. Almost, but not yet. Leo looked ready, though. Logan didn’t even know if he was starting in goal tonight, it could be Kasey, but Leo still looked ready. The feeling only increased when Leo finally saw Logan, waiting for him just down the steps. Logan had tried to dress inconspicuous, if only not to draw any fans—not to not be noticed. Part of him—and this part was so new that it almost didn’t feel like him at all, like running a hand through short hair after a haircut—wanted the entire world to stare as he took Leo for his own, everyday, broad-daylight happiness.

Leo stopped at the front of the steps and stared down at him, lips a little parted, eyes soft. Even disbelieving, Logan thought, and he didn’t want that. He wanted Finn and Leo to believe him. Believe this. So, he withdrew one of his hands from his pockets and held it out silently, palm up. Waiting.

Leo got a look in his eyes then, telling Logan he knew exactly what was about to happen, and all of Logan’s careful planning went right out the window because no sooner had Leo walked down the steps and strode up to him, than did he take Logan’s face in his hands, lean down, and kiss him hard on the mouth, right there in the sunlight.

And didn’t that certainly feel like what Logan had needed all his life. Careful Leo, gentle and willing to please, now taking him by storm.

It didn’t last long, hard and happy. Leo put his palm into Logan’s like they’d done it a million times instead of just thinking about it. “Where you taking me, huh, Tremblay?”

Logan let out an embarrassing sound, half laugh, half something love-struck. “No hello? I had a plan.”

“That was my hello. And I think we all know how good we three are at following through on perfect plans. Besides, I don’t want to have a plan to kiss you. I just want to do it.”

Logan was going to slip right through the sidewalk cracks. This was different than it had been with Finn—Leo wasn’t unsure at all, and it made it easier. Finn had been just as thrilling, but this…this was syrup and honey and sugar. “You’re sure you’re all right skipping your nap?”

“Are you, all right, Grumpy?”

Logan rolled his eyes. “I don’t get grumpy.”

“Oh, sweetheart. That’s funny.” Leo brought their hands up and kissed Logan’s wrist, face tilted up to the sun. “You know what I never got?”

Logan could only shake his head, staring. He hoped they weren’t crossing a street soon, because he didn’t think he could look away from Leo’s face. He was always lit up to Logan, but this was different. His smile poured out light. He was so happy. He’d never seen Leo this happy before. Not for the Cup, not for anything.

“In, like, high school, right? There was never some nice boy waiting outside of class for me. Backpack, headphone sharing, I don’t know. It feels so…young, like I want a different version of it now, but the same idea? And—and…That’s how I felt just then.” They did finally stop at a crosswalk, in the shade of a tree. Leo looked down at Logan and Logan had to reach out and press a hand against his chest. He could feel Leo’s heart, flying. This was so different from Finn’s quieter, more timid want that he’d seen this morning. Logan understood why Finn had taken more time to melt into the easy happiness he’d worn on their walk home, but seeing Leo like this…Logan felt breathless.

Leo kissed his wrist again. “When I saw you waiting out there and I just thought—that’s him. There he is. He’s waiting for me. And, God damn, Lo, you have this smile that you give me sometimes…” Leo closed his eyes like the thought was something that tasted sweet.

“Look who’s talking,” Logan murmured, and they both smiled because it was a phrase they’d picked up from Finn.

Leo pressed a finger to Logan’s mouth, thumb brushing his bottom lip. “Yeah. That one right there.” He kissed Logan gently, thumb still between them, a little salty. “It makes up for all the lost time. It really does. Makes me feel like why would I ever have wanted anyone then when you were out here waiting for me, you and our boy.”

Logan tangled their fingers together and kissed him properly, aware that he was surrounded by busy people as he pushed up on his toes a little, even as Leo eagerly met him. It made him smile all over again.

“Allez.” Logan used their linked fingers to pull him around the corner instead of across the street where the light had changed. “You’re walking the wrong way.”

The cafe was small but busy, and their knees knocked together as they sat side-by-side at the tiny, round table that’d they’d barely caught. Leo set down the quiche and almond croissant he’d picked out for them to share, barely missing a beat before swiping up a bit of the almond paste that had leaked out and sucking it off his thumb.

“Hm, I was right, you’ll love this thing.”

“Oh?” Logan asked, and tried to ignore the insane hammering of his heart as he glanced for the fourth time at a couple who had obviously clocked them from the moment they’d stepped into the cafe. A man and a woman, just engaged by the way they had been admiring the diamond on her slender finger before they’d looked up and the woman had used that hand to excitedly hit her partner, alerting him to Logan and Leo’s presence.

“I see them, too,” Leo said softly to him now, and Logan looked back at him. His blue eyes were closer to how Finn’s had been now. Wondering. Waiting. Understanding. Hesitating. Logan heard them call his name for their coffee’s. Logan? the voice said. Logan? Waiting. So much waiting.

“Leo,” Logan said softly, and then leaned forward, fingers gentle at Leo’s jaw, and kissed him. Slow, easy, aching. A loud group of women talking by the door, an elderly couple sitting beside them, someone still waiting in line jostling their table with their shopping bags. Kissing Leo. He tasted like the sweet almond of the pastry. Logan did like it, but he wanted it again and again from Leo’s lips only. He wanted this again and again and again. He pulled back just as slow, barely giving them any distance at all. Just enough to see Leo’s blue eyes blink open. “Thank you for waiting for me.”

Leo’s brows drew together, lips pressed together in a smile brimming with emotion, and he nodded slightly, careful not to disturb the air between them.

“Of course,” he whispered. “God, Logan. Of course I did. Of course we did.”

Leo kissed him again, short and sweet, and then held up a piece of the croissant. “Here, so you don’t get grumpy. I’ll get our drinks.”

Logan just rolled his eyes and took it gently from Leo’s fingers with his teeth before Leo got up. He hummed happily as he chewed, Leo setting his creamy coffee in front of him. “Alex took me here, and I thought you would love it. He said to mention his name and we’d get everything free, but…” Logan wrinkled his nose.

“I know how you feel about extra attention, baby.” Leo laughed and tucked a hand around Logan’s shoulders. They’d never been able to do that before, not like this. The way Leo held him was close. Romantic. “We’re the last people who need anything for free.”

“If Finn was here, we’d be best friends with that couple and all of those people by the door,” Logan said.

“The barista,” Leo smiled. “Probably the chef, too.”

Logan laughed. “Ouais, true.”

Leo took another bite and sighed. “Ugh. Maybe it’s all right after all if you’re in New York. I can visit these croissants all the time now.”

Logan gave him a shove, but leaned in close so Leo would keep his arm where it was. They sat like that for as long as they could, knowing they had to get back to the rink soon. It wasn’t exactly an approved pre-game meal, but Logan had never felt more energized, more awake. He was alight with how he couldn’t stop touching Leo, how Leo couldn’t seem to stop touching him. He all but melted back into his seat when he felt Leo’s large palm smooth over his thigh. It wasn’t a come-on. He was just touching back. Touching, and laughing, and closing all the space that they’d had to allow for before, like sewing up and mending a tear in cloth.

As they left, hand-in-hand, Logan couldn’t help himself. He risked a glance towards the couple. The woman was watching the rest of the cafe, thumb smoothing happily over her ring, but he locked eyes with the man. Logan prepared himself for the worst, as he always had. A glare, or even just an awkward darting away of the eyes. But the man only smiled and mouthed Go Rangers. Logan smiled back, small and shy, but flashed a thumbs up with his free hand and let Leo lead him back onto the street.

They held hands for the short walk back to the hotel and Logan felt like he was saying goodnight after a first date as they stood there by the doors, once again at the bottom of the steps. Leo rocked forward on his feet once, gazing down at him.

“Can’t wait for tonight. We’ll just meet at your place? Coach always keeps us later for games like this.”

“I know,” Logan said. “Yeah. I’ll have some food for us.”

“What’s this?” Leo’s eyes widened. “Logan Tremblay—cooking?”

Logan rolled his eyes. “I can make pasta. You know this.”

“Hm, we’ll see about that.” Leo put his hands on Logan’s waist and pulled him in nice and close. “Oh, and one more thing.” His smile turned challenging, confident. He leaned in and spoke so that his words brushed Logan’s mouth. “You’re not getting a single shot past me tonight, Tremblay.” He kissed Logan slowly, words in between. “Not. A single. One.”

Logan just kissed his grinning mouth. “We’ll see about that, Knut.”

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