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little-reader · 7 months

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"The Son of A Monster." Ch. 8

Masterlist

Carl Grimes x Male!Reader

Warnings; Graphic Gore, Death, blood, Slow-burn, Sexual tension, Gay awakening (For both), Cursing, Negan is the Readers dad, Enemies to lovers story. Fighting. Zombie Apocalypse. Implied rape.

I sat in a room I was quite familiar with. This time, it had an extra bed, with blankets lying at the end. It was moved into the house after I was checked. I lay in this bed for hours. My back was facing the room as I stared at the wall. Plain blue wallpaper with a few cracks. There wasn’t much to do. I felt like a misbehaving child, sent to his room without supper. I was tired, and I hadn’t seen anyone since I came into this room.

There wasn't much to say. What could I say? I sighed, staring at my fingers as I fiddled with them. The talking downstairs could be heard as it echoed through the hallways outside the door. I wasn't sure what they were talking about, but I could guess. I feel as though I will not be leaving this house or room for a while. A long while. I guess it wasn't too bad. A bed, food, a shower... and alone with my thoughts. It wasn't all that bad, it was quiet and calm, just what they wanted.

I could hear footsteps coming upstairs and walking down the hall as I closed my eyes. The door handle was turned and pushed in. Soft feet camp in and close the door. I could hear the creak of the other bed and a light flip on, a lamp beside his bed, and pages flip. His beloved comics. That's what he was reading. It wasn’t usual, he'd stay up for hours either rereading comics or action books. Sometimes, he would draw with a Sharpie, making his figures.

I thought that was cute. He is making his figures. When he left the room, I would skim through his stack of papers, looking at the small pictures he drew.

I sigh silently, slowly moving my head to look at the other bed. He was doing exactly that. Reading a book this time in his bed. His hat was hung on the top of the lamp and flannel was thrown at the bottom of the bed. His shoes were left at the door, showing how he lazily took them off.

“You up?” He asked, making me realize he was looking at me. I hummed, and looked at the wall, playing with my fingers. Why did they put me in this room? As a joke, or had he asked? Or was he now supposed to watch over me like I did with him? Doesn't matter really. I'm stuck. He left me behind. For all he knows, I could be dead… I rub my eyes, yawning. “Dad said you're allowed out of the house if someone's watching over you.” He states as I give him another small hum. I was sure this annoyed him, by his small sigh and the sound of shuffling behind me. His light moved and pointed at me. I could see his shadow moving around on the wall as I had my head shoved into the pillow. My fingers played with the fabric of the pillowcase, pulling on the old rattan tag that was attached to it.

I felt a dip in my bed as Carl sat behind me, getting comfortable. I wasn’t sure what his motive was, but I didn’t appreciate it as I moved closer to the wall. I pushed my body forward and rolled onto my stomach, the blanket slipping off me because of the movement and Carl sitting on it. I grunted.

It was a while before he read. I could hear the book pages flip, and see his shadow moving as I stared at it. My heart beat a little faster. Something hit me rather quickly. I kissed him. In front of his family. His whole family. Shit. Though, he acted like it didn’t happen. I couldn’t tell what hurt worse, rejection or throwing it away. Another mistake, another damn mistake. It pissed me off to think he put off the kiss. But that was selfish. I was selfish. Now I’m here, with Carl reading on my bed, in a room I’m stuck in, in a town I have been in for months. I was always stuck here. This time, it would be harder to leave, to sneak out.

I sighed and turned on my back, now staring at the ceiling. Carl looked over from his book at the sudden movement. I stared at him, before letting my arm smack into his book down and sighing again. He rolled his eyes.

“I'm… sorry,” I said, barely over a whisper, as I left my armrest on his lap and stared at my fingers again. I raised an eyebrow. His head tilted slightly. “I… I’m sorry, for everything.” I whispered, only glancing at him for a second. Lifted myself into a sitting position, letting out a breath as I did. “I didn’t know why I was going home. I didn’t know he was gonna kill your people, hell I did too.” I paused, picking at my nails. “And I’m sorry for doin’ that in front of your family. It was selfish,” I stated, not daring to look at the young boy. I was honestly scared to look at him. What emotion would lie in his expression? Disgust?

I jolted slightly as he placed his hand on mine. I didn’t move them for a moment before I started to wrap my fingers intertwined with his. I sighed softly. “I don’t know what to feel. It's new for me.” Carl said, in the same calm voice, as he stared at our hands. “I…” He pauses like he’s trying to think about what to say. “I like you… and the time I spent with you, it wasn’t just me keeping you away… I’m sorry about that too. I enjoy spending time with you, Y/N. I love going out of the walls almost every week, watching you tell stories in that old house. I love going to that lake, going in and sitting in the field to dry off and stare at the clouds. I love when you give me your comic collection or teach me how to make pasta… I feel myself around you.” He stated, playing with my fingers. “Everyone warned me you’d hurt me… and all you’ve done is the opposite. I can’t count how many times you’ve saved my ass out there, in here… you make this world… better.” He grips my hand, now staring at me. I stare back. I want him. Crave the boy near me. I lifted my hand and rubbed his cheek, pushing his hair out of his face, and looking at his face. His bandage covered the side of it, and his face looked like he was confused, but strong in his emotions.

“I… you know… 'm two years older than you... Bigger than you.” I started like I was trying to deny, reject, or back out. He broke eye contact and nodded, “Hey…” I paused, dipping my head down to catch his gaze. “Just… no funny business,” I whispered, and he chuckled slightly, then left it to a small smile. I rubbed his chin with my fingers. I felt his hand squeeze mine as my eyes flickered to his lips.

I smiled and kissed his cheek softly, pulling his chin to kiss the other. I kissed the corner of his mouth, then his chin, and the tip of his nose before I paused. I felt content at the moment. I looked down, my eyes locking with his, as I rubbed his chin with my thumb softly, and softly pressed my lips to his mouth, letting myself sink into the other boy. I let my hands wrap around his hair, bringing him closer.

I had my body draped across his, our legs wrapped together. I had just noticed how much bigger I was than him, but he was younger, so that might change shortly. I had my arms wrapped around his torso, and my head propped against his shoulder as he read. The blanket went to my shoulder. I closed my eyes, letting myself soak in his body heat as I drifted to other places. My mind kept on him as I fell asleep.

Dusty fields overlapped my body, the ingrown wheat or the yellow fields surrounded me as I lay in them. I opened my eyes, slowly looking around, I saw clouds looking down upon me as I was suddenly lifted into a standing position without moving a muscle. I blinked, turning my torso, but unable to move my feet forward. I could see a hand peeking out from the crops as I squinted. I felt my hands clench. The hand from the crops reached out towards me, inviting me in. The ring on the finger was oddly familiar, the hand pale and purple, with long nails and a pearl bracelet. Soft and dead. I reached out for it, trying to speak, I knew the hand quite well, or so I had not seen this hand in a while. I tried to screech out. But hands from the fields behind me started to grab me and pull me into them. I leaned my upper body over, trying to grab the hand, I wanted to yell out, but nothing came out, just the sound of the wind. The other side of the field was lit on fire, engulfing the hand as I was pulled in. One gloved hand, a smaller hand with dirt in its fingernails, two children's hands, and a dead hand with long nails and a black sleeve.

My eyes opened wide, feeling the sweat pool on my back as I lay there and felt my lungs heave quickly. I swallowed, my throat dry as I moved myself away from the sleeping boy. He shifted in his sleep, turning his back to me as I climbed over his legs. My feet touch the ground, feeling the floor beneath them. Something felt off about this room, it wasn’t set perfectly. I mean, everything was in its place, the book Carl was reading, same color, same light, same bead, sheets and blankets… Something was different. I felt wrong as I stood in the middle of the room. It started to cave, the room was getting smaller, and the walls started to turn into shapes as I started to lose my balance. The humming was heard behind me, in different tones, pulling me towards the voice. Blackness. Sweat and a thud.

“He just got out and passed out,” Carl said, looking at the two for help. “He won’t wake up and he’s not responding.”

Yelling was heard down the hall as Rick and Michonne got out of bed quickly, and raced down the hall with weapons in hand. The door slammed open, and the two looked around, expecting to see a different scene. Carl looked panicked on his knees, looking at my sweating, pass-out body as he held my head in his lap.

“Michonne,” Rick said, putting his gun down. She nodded and left the room. Rick made a quick effort to check my pulse. “He’s not doing so hot,” Rick said, feeling the heat radiate off of my body. He lifted my shirt up and slowly peeled off the bandage. “Jesus.” He said, covering his nose and pushing it back.

That made Carl panic more. “What? What is it?” He said, going to pull the bandage but Rick moved his hand back. The smell circled the room. “Dad.” He said, covering his nose. “What's wrong?” He questioned.

Rick shook his head, looking at his son before pulling the bandage and turning on the bedside light. “That smell… that is the infection,” Rick said, looking at the deep wound. There was goo covering the bandage and wound. Carl's eyes widened.

Carl watched from his bed as Aaron, Toby, Daryl, and Carol came in with a carrier. Carol looked over the wound, whispering where Rick could not hear. Michonne had a medical box with her as they lifted my body on a board. Carol took off the old bandage and wiped down the wound with an alcohol wipe. They slowly carried me out of the room to take care of me somewhere else.

Carl was left awake, in his room alone. His thoughts left him in worry.

“Who checked him yesterday?” Rick asked, outside the medical building. Daryl shrugged. “That boy looks like death, his skin is rotting and nobody noticed?” He asked, looking at the group.

“Must have happened when he was taken off the IV,” Michonne stated, looking at the door. “But you're right, he shouldn’t have been brought out.” Rick sighed, hands on his hips.

Fire. I burned through my veins. I was replaying the day over and over. The woods lit. Screaming and blood. Replay after replay.

A hand ruffled my hair as I pushed it off. My small hands patched up a jacket with a needle. “Me and some boys are going to go hunt for rabbit,” Negans said, looking down at me with a sight smirk. I smile back at him. “You be good and stay out of Bert's way, don’t think he likes us after the fight.” He whispered the last part and I nodded.

He had his bat and a bow. The others laughed and waved him over, he called to them and once again, ruffled my hair before leaving. There weren’t many people here, in the tiny civilization we called home. There were tents, big and small, for different families or groups. Groups of watchers are on the sides of the camp, keeping the people inside safe.

I was in a group of girls, and my small body was not able to help the other boys, or at least that is what the others said, and my dad agreed with them. So I stayed with the other girls, helping out with washing, sewing, cleaning, and butchering. It wasn’t just because I was small. I played many sports and built up strength from them, but I was younger and smaller than the rest of the boys, even some girls my age. But I hadn’t minded, that meant I could stay away from one side of the camp. Bert ran half of the camp, and Harriot ran the other. They were connected, chores scattered in many places of the camp but both of them knew how to do two different things. Harriot was a kind woman, who showed me kindness and softness when meeting our small group at first. Then there was Bert, who hadn’t wanted us here in the first place. He fought my dad quite a lot. I’ve sometimes seen my dad grip his bat, looking at it in our shared tent when he thought I was asleep. Bert is an ass, to say the least. Someone you shouldn’t be near. But he wasn’t stupid. He kept his eyes trained on me most of the time. Sometimes I would make eye contact with him to see him glaring at me from afar. But he’d only mess with me when my dad was gone, or when Laura was not watching over me.

I sat quietly, finishing up with the patched pants, that I was quite proud of, when I heard feet trail behind me. I look over my shoulder, folding the pants in my lap. Bert and a few boys, who looked like they wanted to kill me, stood with me with a grin plastered on his face.

“Boy.” He said, crossing his arms. “I think it’s time you do some real work, not sitting around like a little lady.” This made the boys laugh at me, I felt like a turtle that started to tuck into its shell. I glance at the pants and back at him.

“But… my dad said-” He interrupted me with a huff. “- blah, blah, blah.” He said, waving his hand. “I’m sure you’d be fine. You need to be a man, boy.” He said, grasping my arm and pulling me up. “Need to help or I’ll tie you in a tree, let the bitters get ya.” I gulped, nodded along with him as I stood, and placed the pants on the log where I sat.

I was pulled along with the other group of boys, clearly smaller and younger than them. I let myself glance as we passed out of the camp ridge over at Bert’s side, near the butcher tent and fire. The dawn just started to settle. We stopped by the fire, where logs sat near a tree. “Now, c’mon boys.,” He said, clapping as they started moving logs. I looked around, confused without directions. Bert looked at me like I was stupid. “Dammit, boy. Move em’!” He yelled, pointing to the tent. I rapidly nodded and started to move the logs slowly. I had two in each arm, they were heavy but nothing I couldn’t manage.

I felt the playful shove of my shoulder from one of the boys as he grinned and passed me quickly. I blush as I sit down the logs in the pile made. Older boy, by three years. 17, he was. I saw him around a lot, sometimes he would come and talk to me, ask me about how I used to live, or if I’d be joining him in some of the other's chores. Brunette with green eyes and a sweet apple-picked smile. His teeth were almost perfect, one back with a slight outward angle. He towered over me most times, but talked sweetly, sometimes pulling me to his chest when no one was around. Husten, or hue for short, was his name. He called me Pinky or Doll, he said it was because I always worked with the girls and I was smaller than him.

He’d brush my hair with his hands, playing with it, but listen to my ramble on about something stupid. He’d play with his foot under tables during supper, or bump my knee with his. He said his love language was physical contact. I remember, once I had a nightmare and wandered out at night where he was finishing up putting wood in the fire. He brought me back to his tent, where his father was out on watch. He had my head to his chest, rubbing my scalp and humming an old melody my mother used to sing. He rubbed my back until I fell asleep.

We always got along. It made me feel bubbly inside. However, I ignored this fact and went on with my chores. It started to get dark, and now the fire and a few lights lit up the trees as the boys finished up. I plucked up the last bit of logs as I stared at Hue, he was talking to some of the others. This caused me to trip over my feet and land in the mud.

I heard laughter and a huge huff behind me as I lifted myself. The wood under me left my hands scraped and rugged. I hissed and looked at them as I was pulled up by my shirt collar. “Boy, you have annoyed me for the last goddamn time.” He said, gripping the sides of my arms. He then looked behind me and smiled. “Go get the rest, out past the orange line.” He said, pointing over to a spot that had been spray-painted. Danger at night. That is what it meant. The watchers could not see in specific spots at night and marked them not to go near at night and not to stray away from camp. You were only allowed over there if it was early morning and the watchers already checked the area.

“Bert, it's not safe-” Hue tried to reason with the men, glancing at me. Bert interrupted him, shoving me back. “He has to be a man someday,” Bert stated, crossing his arms. “Now, go on boy, go get it.”

I gulped and looked over to the darkness that clouded the trees. I gulped and looked back at him, other boys were smiling, grinning at my frozen state. It’s like they were waiting for my downfall. I breathed in, and out.

Carl stared at the body on the bed as monitors were giving the occasional beep. It had been a couple of days since the night. He sat close, sometimes going out of the walls for supplies or with his dad. Iris was also here a lot. She traveled back from Alexandria, conversating with Carl. Though, she said multiple times she wasn’t feeling it, standing around, waiting for the monitors to lead the beep on. Carl played with his hands, he’d open the blinds and let the sun pour into the room. His heart ran at times, wondering as he would space out for half hours and wonder. He left a stack of his comics on the bedside table to read when bored, but he never really had the thought to.

(Two days ago)

Carol came out of the medical building and cleaned her hands. “The boy is fine. We needed to open the cut again. He stopped the bleeding, but the wound was still internal. We stitched him back up..” She paused, sighing as she looked at the group. “Kid knows what he’s doing, that was only meant to stop the bleeding until he could get attention. I’m honestly surprised he’s not dead… and Not to accuse anyone, but they should have known this was going to happen.”

Rick, hands on hips and in thought, nodded. He rubbed his chin. “I… he’s only two years older than Carl, He saved Carl. That kid is different from his father and people need to see that.”

Rick was out in a few hours, looking for supply with Carl. They stopped at a gas station not too far along. Rick had a plan going along by now, Carl helped for the past two weeks, watching the plan form, and also understanding others were at war.

“I’m glad he’s slept through most of this.” Said Rick, looking at Carl. Carl looked up at the sudden talk with a confused gaze. “He’s his father's son… but he’s got some different traits. Good traits.” He said, tilting his head as he looked at Carl. Carl only nodded. “Listen… He’ll be fine, He’ll be awake before you know it. The boy needs his rest." Silence bore into the conversation as Carl kicked a rock around.

"How?" Carl’s eyebrows furrowed, refusing to look back up at his father's eyes. “How bad was it?” He whispered, looking at Rick's feet. Rick shook his head.

“Not the worst, but not the best. He could have died, honestly…” Rick heard Carl’s breath hitch. “Carol said he should be fine, it might take a while to fully recover.”

I felt the slight wind knock against my skin, allowing me to shiver. The leaves crunched under my nervous foot as I passed the lined grass and into the seething darkness that captured me. I reached my destination. People behind me clapped as I picked up the last two logs. Heavy they were, as I turned on my feet and started to head back.

As expected, the gurgling made me pause and freeze in my spot. I stared into pitch-black darkness. Nothing. I looked over at the group as Bert yelled at me to “hurry my ass up”. I gulped and started walking once again. I continued. I was at the fire that was near the butcher tent and orange line when a branch snapped to my right, and, in a split second, I hit a grill and fell onto the ground.

I could hear myself scream, having my clothed arm in its mouth, tearing at the leather. Its hands tried to reach my face. I felt the heat rise in my face, though I couldn’t tell if it was the situation I was in or the gigantic fire behind the biter.

It was pulled off me in a matter of seconds. I rolled onto my stomach, the world spinning as I looked beside me. My eyes widened. Hue stood beside my lying body, a knife in hand as three biters crowded over him. Bert and the others were focused on the fire that was spreading rapidly. One lurched onto him, and he was able to kill that one, but the other was able to bite into his forearm, ripping out a chunk of skin. The third gripped his arm and bit into his neck, both causing a scream as he pulled it off. He kicked the third away, killing the second.

I stared at him as he turned, holding his arm as blood started to flow out. “I-I… I-” I felt tears overflow my eyes as I stared at him. My hands gripped the dirt. He dropped his knife and fell to the ground in a sitting position as he stared at me. I was able to crawl over to him quickly, staring at him with wide eyes. He examined his arm, which continued to bleed out. He didn’t have long.

“I… I like you, kid.” He said, with a smile, pain in his eyes. He breathed heavily. "You can’t be weak in this world… you’ll die just like me. Just like… I’m not built for this world.” He said. I shook my head and he only nodded, placing his bloodied hand on my face. I quickly held his bleeding forearm and he laughed, pressing his lips to mine, with little energy. “Run.” He whispered, falling against the tree he leaned on. I shook my head as I saw his eyes start to wave open and close. I heard him breathe in deep and shallowly, before letting his chest fall one last time. His eyes stared at me, keeping them open as I started to cry, shaking his shoulders.

“Wake- wake up!” I called him, his head falling. I gripped his sleeves, feeling my upper body start to fall and my forehead pressed against his knees as I sobbed.

Gripping hands threw me to the side and onto a tree. My pleas were unheard as Bert’s angry hands went to my face and threw me into the mud. The cutting started. Blood spilled down my arms. People ignored me, seeing me as a threat as he cut me up. I felt wasted, as blood rushed from my body slowly. My head was shoved into the dirt, and the fire was unsaveable.

People were rushing things away, trying to keep the fire from spreading further into the camp.

Everything was just a ringing tone in my ear. I felt the pain spread, and Bert's hands wandered as I lay helplessly on the ground. People refused to look at it, blaming the event on me, and letting me be cruelly punished. He would say things like, “You wanted all this attention, I’ll give it to you” or “I’ll get one last thing out of you before you die.”

I felt tears welded into my eyes. My hands gripped the mud as he yanked off my clothes. What was I to do, weak, cut, and close to naked where nobody heard my cry for help, not even allowing a glance?

I remember his words. Run. I should have. I should have listened to Hue, he warned me. Like he said, you can’t be weak in this world.

Screaming. Not mine. I looked up, not moving my head. His face was ripped apart to where I could see his skull. Scared, I tried crawling away, but his grip stayed on me, not letting me go. I tried pushing away from him.

It wasn’t until someone pulled him off of me that I was able to get was, sobbing for the other to leave me alone. I was yanked up. “Hey, boy.” My dad said, looking over me. He yanked me to his chest, looking at the two dead. I saw. The biter ripped his face off, Hue. Dead. That made me cry harder as I stared at him. Everything started spinning.

Replay.

Chapter 9

#carl grimes #carl grimes x male reader #twd #the walking dead #twd x you #carl grimes x reader #male reader #twd x reader #negans son #negan #rick grimes #twd carl #carol peletier #daryl dixon #twd daryl #the walking dead daryl

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evilminji · 4 months

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OKAY. *slams open door in manic about to have opinions*

MAYBE i am binging so, SO much unhinged bnha fics? Have already sent this to all my mutual and is not ENOUGH? But everyone is focused on these BABIES and not the MOST unhinged of them all? You COWARDS!!!

That's RIGHT! Ya girl has been hitting the "yandere/obsessive/possessive" behavior tag on Ao3 and is REFUSING TO BE NORMAL ABOUT IT! I have THOUGHTS DAMN IT! AaaaaaaaaaAAAAAA-!!! *Flips table*

Why the FUCK everyone focusing on BABIES?

I get it, don't yuck someone else's yum. To each their own. I respect that. But ALSO? What lvl of unhinged could they POSSIBLY HAVE? They are FIVE. SMOOTH FACED TODDLER BABY BOYS! A CHILD!

Like? Listen...

You know how Quirks are basicly evolutionary advantages? Random protections that are hit or miss? I have touched on this before in my naruto WIP (that i never posted but shush), but there must exsist a theoretical opposite of killing intent.

A sort of loving/peaceful intent if you will. A SAFETY intent. Or, for the purposes of THIS scenario and slightly to the left of that, a "love me" field. Which? Unlike what the perverse might believe or suggest? Just makes the target... love you.

Not sexually desire.

Love. Care about. Emotional connection.

And, yeah, maybe i've just been reading too many fics where shigiraki do what shigiraki does, and he is his unhinged obsessed lil self. Too many unhinged yandere fics where i darkly mutter "you are forgetting their Core Character Motivatioooooons! Just write an OC!"

Because you can twist a characters personality WITHOUT forgetting who they ARE. Thats what makes it INTERESTING, after all. Seeing how it could go so very, very wrong. How a good emotion, taken too extreme, can corrupt! N it's not just "oh that means violence n cursing right? Immediately jumping to cruelty?"

Its the obsession. The need to consume. The manipulation and care in which they try and maintain the illusion. It isn't one crack and "whelp, fuck it I guess!". Every character is different! Breaks under the strain of 1000% loving someone, DIFFERENT. And it brings up FASCINATING dynamics n potential quirk reactions?

Cause a emotional quirk WILL work. Even on people who supposed "dont have any" emotions? Because thats not how the human body FUNCTIONS. They HAVE all the necessary components. They just have a disorder. The Quirk would be forcing their body to MIMIC "feel-Y.exe" and their body would go with that. How THEY would process that data? What would it FEEL like to THEM? Whole different story.

But they WOULD feel "love" in what ever capacity THEY understand it.

You don't want to hurt your BEST FRIEND do you? You love them. Your BELOVED SISTER? This CUTE CHILD? She seems so NICE. Or maybe it's a precious and to be protected PET? She doesn't know what she'll get, "love" is nebulous and multifaceted. Could be platonic, familial, romantic. The love of a comrade. But it's never failed BEFORE. (Not, that I imagine, she being a well adjusted young lady, would feel morally comfortable USING said quirk in such times of peace. On anybody.)

We're all friend here, right? No need to be aggressive! Hurt anybody! Let's all put our weapons down, yeah?

But! This runs into a PROBLEM. The fuckin Yandere. Your bog standard sociopath. Those to whom this love field/targeting/ray/what-have-you is either so completely foreign too or NOTICEABLE as to be ineffective. Or to whom "love" is AGGRESSIVE.

Who's concept of "love" would actually make the problem WORSE.

I bring this up? Because I am FACINATED by the concept of AfO falling in love.

He... he would be COMPLETELY unhinged about it. The very act would unlock LAYERS to his deeply fucked up, highly obsessive, mind games and bank vaults, squirrel brain.

But I don't think he'd ever WILLINGLY fall in love. Or even be capable. Might be a brain chemistry thing, honesty. But the very reason his CLINGS to his his brothers quirk? Is because his brother was HIS. They were connected. It was... the closest thing he understood to love. And he is unhinged even to this day about it.

EIGHT GENERATIONS OF USERS LATER.

So like? If he spooked some poor soul? With a "love me" quirk? And she, in terror, tried to blast this Scary Supervillian into Not Hurting Her? She would have NO WAY of knowing that she just made a HUGE fucking mistake. Like... conceivably, the WORST mistake.

Because all it would take? Is her NOT instantly dying. No reflexive "how dare you use your Quirk on me". And? The altered brain chemistry starts to kick in. He's suddenly getting?? All these NICE happy brain chemicals that his body has been fuckin STARVED off? Fascinating new sensations? Elevated mood?

It's fake. He KNOWS it's fake. :) But that doesn't mean he won't murder her if she STOPS :)

Looooove yoooou~♡

Does it shift in to real, deeply deranged, love? Impossible to tell. Someone for the LOVE OF GOD call All Might. But?? He's just such an unhinged MESS it's fascinating to explore how emotional quirks would even react to him? Fascinating to think about how he would REACT if he had a SECOND "little brother" scenario. A person he CARED about. But this time... WORSE because it was in a way he could somewhat comprehend AND he had FAR more power then before.

Would it derail everything? Would he be able to focus on his Machiavellian plans while being able to fold them into them? Would he fuckin CONSUME THEM like he did Tomura? Ultimate form of love, after all, to become HIM.

How long could she, the hypothetical Quirk holder, keep that Quirk ACTIVE? Fear is a powerful motivator.

Just?? Why are there not more fics about the Ultimate Creep, BEING CREEPY AND UNHINGED??? He's VERY GOOD AT IT. Has had a LOT OF PRACTICE. LET AfO be deeply insane, 2XXX!

#minji's ponderings #minji's ranting #bnha #mha #AfO #yandere #yandere AfO #let him be unhinged you cowards #its his natural state!

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farawaysoph-ie · 5 months

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The Sunshine Court Incoherent Whatever (pt.1)

Okay. Okay.

I just finished The Sunshine Court and 1) Jean Moreau what have you done to me? 2) Jean Moreau what have(n't) they done to you?

I started this, then went and re-read tkm (bc the obsession was always latent and never gone), so I could compare both Neil and Jean pov and well, suffice to say I'm not okay and I feel too much.

Thank you Nora Sakavic, it was painful and amazing.

I have a long train ride so I might as well bring back my incoherent whatever after *checks the notes* 4 years :')

As always this will be so full of spoilers.

(Unrelated spoiler: the train ride wasn't enough)

Let's start with the general:

After loving Neil maybe too much the shift to Jean took awhile to adjust to but now I'm ready to fight at least three mafia families, every single hater (fictional or otherwise) and the FBI for him

Jeremy Knox was everything, but like everyone on here, what are you hiding Jeremy?? What's going on??

Cat and Laila, my beloved ™️ the care these two effortlessly gave made me cry

This whole book was a serious trigger for me, but I'm in too deep with this series, imagine me like that Simpsons meme, I did it for my new french son

Characters, thoughts:

I said before the Ravens were a cult, but I hadn't really understood that statement. Every time Jean spoke of them it hit deeper and deeper how messed up and unfair it all was.

Boy am I happy that Riko is dead, like I didn't really wish anyone the fate of being shot by an unfeeling older brother, until Jean's pov hit me like a high speed train.

Andrew spoke exactly one word in this, still was iconic and a scene stealer, how in character for him

I forgot how much I always want to slap Kevin Day when he's trying his best to be annoying, it's because I love him, I swear! (But seriously his relationship with Jean is so complex and well executed I will think about it for a very long while)

I didn't give much thought to Renee and Jean relationship in tkm, but it broke my heart here, it's when I started to actually tear up, I love them so much rainbows, a cool evening breeze. I can't.

"Tell me something"

"Where are you now?"

The whole dynamic of the Cat&Laila& sometimesJeremy's apartment

Cat teaching Jean how to cook + motorbike ride (open roads)

Laila taking him to shopping

Jeremy wanting to make Jean Moreau the Person his success story

Neil dragging Jean towards survival without giving him a choice, again and again: he sent Renee as gentle bait, closed a deal in his name with a mafia boss, promised him he would win against Riko in his name too, promised him again Riko was dead, ordered a hit on his rapist, offered to delay the talk with the FBI, linked his sister to his name, to survival and to what he deserved. I NEED more interactions between them, I am not above begging.

I have to get a better idea on the other Trojans, but for now the policule was cute, I need more Cody and less Lucas. Like I can understand where he was coming from? But he needs to shut up now, you made your mess man, now go play Exy like you were supposed to.

I miss the Foxes :'(

Wymack! I almost forgot everyone's favourite dad-coach: he showed up, brought alcohol, got more tired, delivered care to yet another traumatized child, spent a whole day on airplanes to bring him to Los Angeles, left him money for clothes&co. bc he's not doing this again, answered his call when he was having The Breakdown. Best dad-coach ever in the history of dad-coaches.

Plot things:

Jean at the beginning was so scared and in so much pain it took a while to get a clear picture of him as a person

Still loved all his salty comments and insults, he couldn't help himself

Renee sitting with him and caring with Abby and Wymack :')

Jean being afraid of going back and of not going back to Evermore, hating the ones that got to leave

The self harm and all the people in this that fought him to keep his hands from his neck, his scars, himself

"I am Jean Moreau. My place is at Evermore. I will endure."

Jean not believing in Wymack care, waiting for the act to end and the other shoe to drop

The disbelief at Kevin being away from the court and him admitting he went at knifepoint (and meaning it literally), sometimes this was a comedy

Wymack, Jean, and the burning of houses

Jean's opinion of the Foxes going from those mediocre fools to those mediocre madmen to the madmen that actually beat Riko Moriyama

Wymack putting Jean's phone in the freezer and hating computers

“That man is years overdue for a high-speed, head-on collision.” couldn't have said it better, but Neil was already on it at that point

"Jean knew better than to look for anger in his stare; the best Kevin could manage was bottomless guilt."

“It was my only chance,” Kevin said. “I knew you wouldn’t come with me.” “My place is at Evermore,” Jean agreed, “but you did not have to slit my throat on the way out.”

“Your blind loyalty to those clowns is exhausting.” “Some of them you like,” Kevin reminded him. “Don’t you dare,”

Nathaniel "Hello Jean" Wesninski vs Jean "Go away" Moreau

This whole conversation went very differently compared to tkm: like there Neil came, dropped a metaphorical bomb, glossed over the explanation and went away trying to convince Andrew they are something

Jean was ambushed by two of his most complicated acquaintances (???) and their "pet goalkeeper" (god I need Andrew's reaction to this "nickname", but I guess no one will ever say this to his face, Neil would be too busy fighting you at the suggestion to ever repeat it), had his worldwiew turned upside down with no chance of having a say in the matter, then was left alone with Kevin Day and the aftermath.

So yes two different conversation; also I kinda forgot of the deal about Neil and his smile

“Everyone who has tried to tame him has failed.”

All for the game: a summary

There was no getting away; there was only getting through.

Jean Moreau who (hasn't) hurt you, part some of too many

What really makes it messed up is that on one hand there was Riko and his mad cruelty and on the other there was an entire team of bystanders At Best: some people were an active part and then pretended, no sympathy for them; others decided to ignore the truth to survive and get what they wanted, which I can understand but I guess they still didn't have the decency to shut up when Jean got away. The anger that crawled through my skin when the smear campaign and the notebook/postcards/magnets thing happened. You should have stayed silent until the end you fucks.

“Do it, then. It wouldn’t take much; we all know I have brittle bones.”

Jeremy pov kinda gave you whiplash, with him waking up super early, helping homeless men, but then you start noticing all the things he avoids almost effortlessly and like, what are you hiding sunshine man??

What actually broke me about his povs was him noticing all these details about Jean, and then misinterpreting them, bc whatever he's been through Jean has had it 100 times worse and this doesn't even factor in Jeremy world. I'm pretty sure he'll get the whole truth in the end and I'm scared of what it'll do to him.

Also Jean being like Ravens always had to keep secrets and then spilling most of them almost unprompted, let's laugh in order not to cry

“He hasn’t played a clean game in years,” Kevin admitted, “but he knows how to follow orders. If you tell him to submit, he will.” “Literally the most awkward way you could’ve worded it,” Jeremy said.

This will keep coming back, Kevin please. (He 100% ships it, one of us)

The Foxes catching the too tired Trojans and Jeremy being like, you are all approved (I need the two teams to interact now)

Also the Trojans being like how are they still standing, Neil how are you still running??

Someone pointed out they wanted Neil to interact with Jeans closest teammates bc if he is a madman by Jean standards, what would normal people make of him? To which yes, but also guys consider this: Neil said to Cat and Laila that they were terrifying after the semifinal, he took a step back when Jeremy opened the door and silently invited him in. I need Neil and the floozies to interact so Neil can experience real fear.

Mafia bosses have nothing on wholesome people, the true weakness of one Neil Josten

Jean immediately hanging up on Jeremy will never not be funny

When you get to the title of the book and it's Jean insulting people <3

I will Never, NEVER, get over the "nineteen". Never.

I love Abby but when she told that bit about fighting back, It Hurt. She probably didn't really mean it and didn't know everything bc how are you supposed to keep fighting when you are fifteen, alone and forsaken in a place that is built to break you? As it has been pointed out, Neil had rebellion beaten into him by a mother that chose him and ran; Jean had a sister that he hoped to protect and parents that sold him away like property. Five months were actually a long time.

Dobson keeps being iconic, I don't know what to think about the I don't know how exy works bit: I mean I've been obsessing with this and still don't know how exy works (plz don't hate me), but at the same time it was such a power move and got Jean to talk

“Of course it’d be you, you tedious malcontent.” “Good morning to you, too.” Nathaniel held up an oversized bandage.

You see why I need more of their interactions, right?

Nathaniel was different; he always would be. He wasn’t a Raven, but he was, same as Jean. He was Jean’s misplaced forever partner, an unfulfilled promise Jean had stopped believing in years ago.

You can now be forever partners while you tear down your families :)

I think that I'm stuck on the two of them bc while Kevin broke a promise to save himself (to which no hate, when dealing with madmen like Riko you have to save yourself) and still couldn't, not completely, Neil was a promise made and broken by other people. Jean hates him bc they were supposed to share a destiny and all the misery, but I think very deep down he knows that if Nathaniel had come to the Nest they would still be nursing wounds and appeasing a tyrant. Neil is the one that stood against Riko when Kevin wanted to hide, the one that gave him courage by example, the one that dragged Jean away from the Ravens, both for selfish reasons (taking down Riko) and better ones (paying him back for saving his life a the Nest).

But still

“You are only here now because you are an abominable cockroach,”

Funny how Neil forgot to tell us about the breakdown about Kevin's tattoo, he was probably thinking about the match. Junkie.

The cheese drawer guys, ???

To this day I still can't decide what was more iconic: Kevin Day switching playing hand halfway through the game and pretty much scoring everything until the last second, Neil being so fast that it made up for him being a shitty defender, Andrew crossing the court to keep Neil from being murdered (I'm biased, but still iconic moments all of them)

Experiencing this match from Jean's pov was amazing writing, like the countdown of the last ten seconds, the Riko-Neil bit without volume but from a different angle (I didn't really realize everyone was able to see the King attempting murder live on TV, but hey perspective)

Run, Jean thought. He didn't know if he was thinking it at Andrew or Nathaniel. Run.

"That wasn't a miracle," Jean typed out. "That was the Foxes."

:')

When Jean found about Riko though :'(

The shudder that wracked his chest should have been revulsion, but it fell dangerously short. This didn't feel like joy or relief; it only felt like loss. [...] Who was he without them?"

I loved that he woke up to Renee and Neil though, the rainbow and the witness

Renee always hitting the point, this wonderful girl

"Maybe you're mourning the wreckage he made of your life. You're allowed to grieve what he took from you."

"It's impressive, isn't it? How easily these monsters die in the end."

Neil Abram Josten said I'm done letting monsters ruin my life and my people, he actually promised.

When he called him Neil guys, tears

Also I found peculiar that when thinking about the room he destroyed Jean calls it "Neil's dorm room", not Kevin's who he's known for actually longer. It's what makes me think that they have a chance at not being misplaced forever anymore.

Renee either hits you with hidden wisdom of the universe or with practical and brutal advice, and we love her for that

The two of them, the Two Of THEEEEEEEEM

Jean noticed how Andrew and Neil moved like they were caught in each other's gravity, in each other's space more than they were out of it, cigarette smoke and matching armbands and lingering looks when one fell out of orbit for too long.

Just leaving this here.

The airport bit :'(

"Men like Wymack didn't exist. They couldn't; they shouldn't."

Enter Jeremy Knox and his yo-yo in the middle of said airport. Flawless.

This man was put on Earth to test Jean, at least that's what he will keep thinking from here on

The rest of this book is Jean having conversations with people and not understanding them, bc he's been living for five (seven) years in a cult. It is an escalation pretty painful to watch, I think the Trojans are all of us :'(

Question: will Jean end up teaching Jeremy French? Will Jeremy learn by himself? I think I'd probably prefer the latter

Cat, the mess, the music, the tour, I love her so much

Jeremy "he's a little off" Knox, he was trying

Barkbark von Barkenstein

Jean Moreau and the real world (bubble tea? you have to shop for stuff? you sign things yourself? you leave campus? someone help this disoriented french bean)

"Something had gone horribly wrong at Evermore"

oh Jeremy

Watching Jeremy regret almost all his questions :'(

“Three fractured ribs. Sprained LCL. Twisted ankle. Broken nose. That’s most of it.” That’s most of it.

Laila, who pushed and got angry for Jean and didn't back down despite him lashing out, my beloved

You look like a Ken doll." + "This isn't blond."

"Not Grayson.[...] Please." that one made me sick, the writing made me feel even only a part of what Jean was feeling and it was enough to feel sick

The water :'(

Jean just leaving when confronted with Laila and Jeremy in swimsuits was very bi of him

Lucas coming in looking like a well know nightmare and the Ravens dropping like flies

I didn't ask.

It's not like I didn't know, right? But I still died inside

Zane and the betrayal

Jeremy didn’t let him get away with it. “That’s not the issue and you know it. I don’t want to crowd you.” “You are not them,” Jean said. “Kevin would not have sent me here if you were.”

Jean taking one look at the doctor sent by the coaches and going nope, Dobson will be definitely better

Jeremy seeing the nightmares and the scars and not being able to do much:(

A hand on his chin startled him into looking up. When he met Jean’s eyes, Jean only said, “Focus on what’s important.” “I am,” Jeremy said. Jean opened his mouth, closed it again, and let go of Jeremy without a word. Jeremy snagged his arm when he started to turn away. “Who did this to you?”

I'm sorry did he just

“It’s not about size, anyway.” “Defensive,” Jean said, tugging his glove straps with his teeth. Jeremy straightened in indignation. “I don’t have anything to be defensive about.” Jean lost his grip and bit his lip, and Jeremy hurried on before either of them could think too much about that double entendre.

“Say ‘yes, Jeremy’.” He had the distinct impression Jean wanted to roll his eyes. “Yes, Jeremy.” Jeremy forgot everything else he could have said in favor of staring. It was the first time he’d heard Jean say his name.

Are you seeing this? Yes? Good, let's go on

“If I ever make you uncomfortable or make you feel unsafe, will you promise to tell me? If you don’t trust me enough to tell me what’s wrong and why, at least trust me enough to tell me that something is wrong. I can’t fix things if I don’t know there’s a problem. As your captain and your partner, don’t I at least deserve the chance to not be a villain in your story?”

The pool bit :'( and after when they tell there are no pools at Evermore. Riko is so lucky to already be dead :)

You’re forcing us to hurt you without giving us any say in the matter.”

Watching Jean trying to navigate his interactions with the Trojans was painful, frustrating but also hopeful. This boy has been hurt so much and so often, he doesn't get what normal looks like anymore. But the Trojans don't let him get away with it (even if it breaks their heart and the coaches will probably get a lot of grey hair from this)

"Your safety and happiness will always be more important than our season.” “You are naïve.” “Maybe you’ll define success by how we do this season, but I’m not obligated to do the same. You are going to be my success story: Jean Moreau the person, not Jean Moreau of the perfect Court. You take care of one, and I’ll take care of the other.” “That is not how it works.” “Is there a rule against it?” “There is no merit to it. This is all I am.” Jeremy ignored that and asked again, “Is there a rule against it?”

Jeremy gay panicking and the photo of Renee

The floozy line!

Every time Jeremy goes "our coaches" or "our teammates" all I can think in my head is "someone will die" "of fun!!!!"

Jean wondering if the Trojans have something against recruiting tall players xD

“Thank you for worrying about them. You’re a good man, Jean Moreau.” “A ridiculous sentiment,” he said. “I mean it,”

This man didn't even second guess himself, he had to ask because he knew and it didn't even occur to him to be silent. Excuse me sir? Shut up you are a good man

“I assumed the Trojans were idiots,” Jean said. “Now I think you are all insane.” “It’s a step up,” Cody said. “I’ll take it.”

The practices, the scars pt2

“It is all I am, Coach.”

“We did not want outsiders at Evermore.” “Except Neil,” Cat said. “Neil was a special case,” Jean allowed.

#accurate

You’re hurting me.” “It has been toward for five years,” Jean said, looking past Jeremy at the scrimmage that was still going on without them. “It is not that easy to undo.” Jeremy frowned at him and echoed, “Five? You were only with the Ravens for three.” “I moved into Evermore two years before I enrolled,” Jean said, and hauled Jeremy to one side. The stray ball that had been coming for them ricocheted off his chest instead of Jeremy’s back, and Jean scooped it up on the rebound with a quick snap of his wrist. He hurled it across the court toward Cody one-handed before finally letting go of Jeremy. “I will try harder.”

The notebooks breakdown hurt so bad bc Cat and Laila being angry for him (they are all of us), Jeremy trying to mediate bc he's been there, he pushed and Jean broke and he doesn't want to hurt him, and Jean who confesses his secrets without meaning to, just to realize and panic. What a recipe for a disaster.

“How dare they blame you for anything after what they did to you. How dare you grieve them.” It hit like a sucker punch, but Jean’s frustrated rejoinder was worse: “They don’t know.”

They don't know, but they could guess. They could smell the blood. They joked about his brittle bones. He was sixteen. I'm not sorry for the mercy I don't have after finishing this book

Jeremy could only watch in wretched silence as Jean tried to walk himself back from the edge. He cast his phone aside in favor of catching Jean’s face in his hands, and the way Jean flinched at his touch was almost his undoing. “Hey,” he said quietly. “Hey. Jean. Look at me.” Jean refused, and Jeremy grasped desperately for anything that could bring Jean back to him. He seized on the only thing he could and threw Jean’s words back at him: “You are Jean Moreau. Your place is here with me, with us. I’m your captain. You’re my partner. We’re supposed to be doing this together, aren’t we? Stop leaving me behind. Look at me.” It wouldn’t work, but it did. Jean opened his eyes to meet Jeremy’s stare. “I told you not to ask me about him.”

I had seen the quote before reading but no one told me what followed ç.ç

He felt a tremor in Jean’s hands, and for a blinding moment he was sure Jean would lean into the safety of this silent confession. But Jean only sucked in a slow breath and said, “Now I am not safe with you, captain.” Letting go of Jean was the hardest thing Jeremy had ever done. Everything in him railed against this, and for a moment he regretted giving Jean a way out.

I was not crying, I swear.

“I’m sorry,” Jeremy said, because he didn’t have the strength for small talk or a softer approach right now. “Did Riko break your hand?”

That was one heavy conversation and it's just the start (Jeremy is Not Fine™️)

He is not used to having a voice, and he has never had power. I cannot promise he will ever talk to you.” “I will wait as long as it takes,” Jeremy said.

Still best boy

And maybe in many ways he still was, but a martyr could still be a monster when the cameras weren’t rolling.

Boy do I have news for you (do you think Jeremy will know that Riko didn't kill himself? Does it matter? I think not knowing this particular detail would be fine, I still don't really know how much this sunshine boy can take (more than I expected but still))

Did I mention that I really love the apartment trio? Cat and Laila agreeing to silence but still being angry (drag them girls, draaaaag them), the dinner and movie and Jean not getting up to leave

Did I mention Lucas is free to shut up and play? :) Because I get that you are angry, but 1) it's not your decision to make, we don't need your conspiracy theories 2) it's not Jean problem, he has enough of them leave him alone

“Ask him why he’s so sure the rumors are true. Ask him what his part in it was. If you’re going to believe him just because he’s blood, then at least make him tell you the truth.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” Lucas demanded.

And Jean still deciding not to lie, he may be an asshole but almost everyone he has known didn't deserve him

Also I don't know where Lucas got the audacity? You think there is something the justifies breaking a player's ribs?? What is wrong with you, you are part of the sunshine court

The dread when asking if Grayson was home

The bike ride :')

Now that they were settled, he expected an interrogation or a reason for this unscheduled trip out. When she failed to explain herself, Jean finally asked, “Why are we here?” “I love it here,” [...] “I don’t know. I just felt like some fresh air would do you good. There’s nothing like a ride to get you out of your head and into the moment, you know?” Jean considered that for a minute. “Thank you.”

Jean waited until he was out of earshot. “I don’t understand.” “Trust us,” Jeremy said tiredly. “Neither do we.”

Jean vs the Trojans, a summary

The monster shows up and it was a mess and Jean has never had a break, literally never

Which was extremely literal bc Lucas wanted to talk and then Neil shows up

I need a separate post for the last pages bc I started this 24 h ago and I want to do it justice. So part 2 coming.

Edit: I misspelled Jean's surname *facepalms and goes to hide*

#tsc #the sunshine court #i didn't know how much i would end up caring about this french boy #new son acquired #tsc spoilers #the sunshine court spoilers #spoilers #aftg #incoherent whatever

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amoransia · 4 months

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Leviathan: "Oooooooooh"

Beelzebub and Asmodeus: (This could've been an email.)

!!!Chapter 65 spoilers below!!!

Good fucking food and good chapter as per usual. Thank you for showing me my snake wife (Satan) again. Loved every page, and I hope Fukayama-sensei is taking his time recuperating from his surgery and doesn't push himself too much.

I say this because those pages were out of this world. I love the spookiness factor they're finally adding. A lot of exorcist manga just focus on the action and completely forget they're dealing with demons (and other creatures of similar nature) so I'm glad Aruma added that in. Belphegor's pathetic poltergeists(?) are really funny, too lol.

Babacat confirmed!! Troperrific called it! I had my money on Cattan instead, lol. Regardless, this basically means she's been spying on Priest since the very beginning, so there's a high chance she'll try to talk-no-jutsu him into corruption(?) using what she knows about him. What Vergilius couldn't convince him to do, she'll probably (almost) succeed? If that's her goal, anyway...

Surprise! Chicken legs, as per her folklore of having a chicken leg-powered house. Nice to see that Aruma-sensei has some basic knowledge on her. As usual, they do look into things. Which makes me happy. I thought the chicken was kinda cute until her disemboweled headless corpse waddled in. Jesus.

Apparently, disembowelment and beheading are the punishments given to schismatics in the Ninth Bolgia in Dante's Inferno. Yeowch. Perhaps this is her punishment because she wanted to help wrongly convicted souls while not inherently being a non-believer and merely disagreeing? I don't know.

I'd also like to mention that Mikhail is probably going to gain a more prominent role when it comes to Baba Yaga. He was the first to recognize it was Baba Yaga, and I think this is because he's more familiar with Slavic folklore than the rest of the cast. After all, Mikhail is a name of Russian origin, so he's probably from around there. He probably got told stories of her as a child.

(I used to affectionately dub Mikhail "Florida man" because of his crazy antics, but he also does fit those crazy Slav dudes that post videos of themselves randomly bringing down abandoned buildings with only bricks. Anyway.)

Really hilarious that Priest can somehow tolerate the horror fuckery that happened this chapter but can't handle horror MOVIES or Japanese spirits. My MC is truly built different and I love him dearly. Someone get him a good therapist and multiple trips to a bunny café.

Just look at him go!!

Imuri's face didn't show up even once in this chapter, by the way! Probably means nothing, but it'd be curious if her reactions were obscured because she was familiar with Granny somehow. Imuri's lived quite a long while, too, after all. Wouldn't be weird if she knew some people here and there.

(Might I add that we've yet to see the mysterious Cass friend she texts... He said he hesitantly submitted a request to see her to the Church, but it's been a while since that...)

This line alone is either a red flag or a green flag, but I'm hopeful it's actually a green flag, since it goes against Satan's wishes. Maybe Baba Yaga will actually sympathize with Priest, since she's been watching over him... dunno!

Additionally, this is also something I mentioned on my Twitter, but to me, it appears that she's being set up as another parallel character to Priest:

Both are the strongest of their team

Got called "it" and "thing" by their respective benefactors

Both want(ed) to help people

Witnessed or witnessing wrongful accusations against the innocent

Priest even sympathized /explicitly/ with people who were wrongly tried for supposed witchcraft in chapter 64. Surely she must've heard him say that? I previously thought Vergilius would take on the role of the parallel, but I think Granny is a more deliberate one!

Welcome back Tachibana my beloved boss girl, in the most literal sense. She even has a big ass coat on. Is she single? We should ask Aruma-sensei. Please do a Q&A, I pinky promise to be civil.

Anyway, I'm convinced Mammon is coming back too, then, since she is extremely capable. Mammon's (first) arc was definitely rushed due to the looming danger of the axe, so I'm excited to see him being pathetic again. He's grown on me, for the wrong reasons. I think he's a big fan favorite amongst the JP sphere as well. He's the only Demon Lord that I feel truly values his human connections, so that's no surprise.

All in all, it was a perfect chapter, and I have nothing to say about the Japanese and/or translation of the chapter; I have but one single complaint:

Chapter 65

Chapter 36

THEY CLIPPED HIS FUCKING NAILS!!! NOOO!!!!!!!!!!! HIS EVIL SLY BITCH SWAG... it's GONE!!!!!!!!!! It has been STOLEN!!!!! Someone has to die for this FUUUUUUUCK

#make the exorcist fall in love #ekuoto #exorcist wo otosenai #amotalk #i'm so mad i'm so mad i'm so mad #i'm so mad the very spirit of satan invades me #why would you cut your nails...... sick and twisted

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alolaamii · 9 months

Text

Ebenezer and Jen Fanfiction

Even when Ebenezer Scrooge was quite the miser, I always thought that he'd have a soft spot for his little sister, Jen. As such, the man never allowed a Christmas to go by without visiting her. And this is just a cute little story about one of those visits.

______________________________________________________________

Ebenezer and Isabel were walking arm and arm through the little village.

Their Christmas had been full of merriment - dining with the Cratchits, visiting Harry and Hela to see their newborn child, and merely just walking about wishing all they passed by a Merry Christmas. While Isabel would never admit it, it was so heartwarming to see her beloved allow the joyous holiday into his heart.

"I hope you don't mind if we make one more stop before we return home."

Isabel looked up at him and smiled. Truly, she couldn't fathom what else Ebenezer wanted to do today, but she was all for it. "Not at all."

* * *

Isabel remained a few paces away and watched the scene before her.

She understood completely - the moment they walked through the front gates, she knew what he wanted to do…and she was happy to see him do it. If anything, she knew it was very therapeutic for him.

Before her stood Ebenezer, standing at his little sister's grave. According to her love, he had been accomplishing this tradition ever since his sister's death - even when he had been quite the miser. Jen had been the light in his life, and never would he allow such a flame to extinguish. As such, since the day of her death, he had made visiting her on Christmas an un-skippable ritual.

Isabel had no idea that he had kept this custom alive and well. The last she had seen of him here, had been the day of Jen's funeral.

Many family and friends had been present for the mourning, and most departed from the grave in a respectable time frame…but, not Ebenezer. He had remained in front of his sister's tomb long after the eulogy had completed.

The man had admitted, that not long after everyone had left, (including herself), he had fallen to his knees, wrapped his arms tightly about Jen's tombstone, and sobbed.

She didn't know if such an act would happen again...but, she wouldn't fail to be there for him this time, if it did.

* * *

Ebenezer placed some flowers on the grave. "Hello, Jen. I apologize for my tardiness today." He chuckled, "I was making rather merry with Isabel, and many friends." He smiled, "How I wish you could be here, to share these times with us." His smile wavered. "How I wish, you could've been with me for the past many years." He frowned, "I know my life wouldn't have been the way it had been, had you still been here. You always had my best interest at heart."

He stopped talking for a moment, almost as if giving Jen a chance to respond.

He smiled, "I don't know if I ever told you this, but Harry looks very like you." He frowned, "I suppose that's why for many years, I chose to hide away from him. He reminded me of you, and it was painful." He shook his head to snap him out of the depressing thought.

"Oh! Do you know that you're a grandmother, now?" He chuckled, "I can't picture you with graying hair." He touched his own locks. "Don't want to end up looking like me, do you?" He smiled brightly. "Believe it or not, Harry's little one was born on Christmas, so they share a birthday." His smile faltered again. "Which means they also share the date of your-" he stopped. Even while standing at her grave, he didn't want to mention death to her. "Well, they share said date with you, as well." He cleared his throat. "But, I'm sure said information would bring you the greatest joy, hmm?"

Ebenezer looked toward Isabel, smiled, then returned his attention to Jen's resting place. "Isabel and I were married last Christmas. Can you believe that your elder brother was able to reconnect with his true love, and find himself married? I'm sure you could." His smile became more warm. "You were the one to introduce me to Isabel in the first place…remember? You and she had become good friends, and you being quite devilish, decided to play matchmaker." He chuckled, "I must admit, you did well in that regard."

He opened his coat, and brought forth the Father Christmas doll that she had made him. "I had given this to your son a few Christmases ago, but he returned it to me on my wedding day. He wanted to assure me that you were there." His eyes became a bit glossy. "And, I know you were there with me, Jen." A few tears started to fall from his eyes - which he quickly wiped away. "I merely wish that you were truly here with me."

He once again fell silent for a moment. He shouldn't be rude and continuously speak, as his younger sister may have needed to voice her thoughts as well. (A foolish thought, he knew…but, one that he would never think otherwise about).

"I love you, Jen." Tears were once again on the verge of falling from his eyes - to which he attempted to stop them, by wiping them away prematurely. "I shall endeavor to stop by more so, than just on Christmas from now on…but, you know that I will always come to visit you on said day."

He leaned forward, and placed a kiss on her headstone. "Goodbye for now, Jen."

He gave the stone a few pats, turned away from it, and returned to Isabel's side. He wiped his eyes one last time, (tearfully) looked at his wife, and smiled. "Well, shall we return home for the evening?"

Isabel merely smiled at him. It was so touching to see him in such a state - full of emotions and love. At one point, she would have never thought him capable of feeling such wonderful sentiments…but, it seemed even from beyond the grave, his sister had been helping him. Truly, if anyone should be given credit for his redemption, it should be Jen.

She nodded, but asked, "You did give Jen my love, yes?"

Ebenezer nodded. He then offered his beloved his arm, and the duo left the peaceful scene.

#ebenezer scrooge #jen scrooge #scrooge 2022 #netflix scrooge #scrooge a christmas carol

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lizhly-writes · 1 year

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you know what i want in my unhealthy cnovel dosage!!! a mc that falls in love first! this is one of the things i filter for when i go a little crazy and start searching novelupdates page by page!

sometimes i read and i just go "What is it that you believe an MC is for, hmm?? Is it to be obediently chased? Is it to say, 'No, I can't return your feelings' only to have these words shoved forcibly in their mouth as they do, in fact, return those feelings?"

see, that last one sounds funny when I say it like that! But I can't do it! I can't approve! Because often times, in those kinds of stories, I can't fucking stand the love interest.

Hey, you! Be a person with honor and self-respect! If you can't express your feelings cleanly, then fucking pine forever!!!! I don't need you to trying to manipulate the main character into professing their love for you when they don't fucking care!!!!

Aiya, honestly, their monologue is so predatory! Infantalizing, too! Do I need to hear about how cute and rabbit-like the protagonist is? Do I need to hear you compare them to a child? Am I supposed to like you???????

Really, why all these passive MCs??? Have some feelings! Go for what you want! Attempt to win the heart of your beloved than the other way around! You can do it, I believe in you!

#liz rants #maybe i should read... actual english romance novels #hey does anyone want to give me any recs that won't make me throw a book off a cliff

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turvuren · 3 months

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cAN I CAN I CANICANICANIIIII

CAN I ASK YOU TO WRITE SOMETHING #WHUMP ABOUT MOON!PHOSPHOPHYLLITE/LITTLE VERS!PHOSPHOPHYLLITE????

and at the same time I’ll share my thoughts on this topic, like, you can ignore them but I just wanted to share so yeah

Maybe Moon / Phos M/F uhoh

I think Phos barely knows Moon...Like, she saw him a couple of times but that was all🤔

Moon is damn tall. Imean...5'8-5'9"??????? And Phos, on the contrary, is a rather short huh, small cute and fragile >:з

I think they would have a small age difference, about a year..

In general, that's all I would like to say, lol, bro. You don’t have to include thoughts in general in the post if you do write something, but it would be great if they were in the post :0

lol i usually write rutile centric stuff 😭😭 I'm pretty indifferent towards phos but I'll try OK SO ive had this idea for a while... sibling phoses. i couldnt think of a way to write them with diff names without it sounding corny in eng, i liked genki phos anyways. like imagine his literal name being winter or moon... or by god, joy. lol

name should be self explanatory. genki - happy, so its the og phos. tsuki - winter. winter phos. tsuki - moon. thats it

cw incest sorry not sorry.

"What the hell is that fucker's problem?..." "What?" Phos shakes her head, gesturing at the man with the weird bucket hair and that weird prosthetic eye. Because no way in hell there's anyone with a natural white iris, right? And heterochromia doesn't work that way. Never does. Her roommate, some weird girl Phos doesn't even bother remembering the name of, just shrugs. "That's just how he usually acts. I think he's a third year." "Still a goddamn weirdo." Phos is messing with the vending machine when he comes across her again, and she just about screams in shock - until she gets a nice, long look at that stupid face. "...brother..?" "Hiya. Long time no see?"

There are 3 Phos's - at least in this small little town. The youngest, Genki, the middle child, Fuyuki, and the eldest half brother to Genki and Fuyuki - Tsuki.

See, Tsuki was a little bit of a brat. And a troublemaker. Genki had never met him, only told stories of him - don't ever turn out like your brother, yadayada, he had been a little bit more than just a handful after - "You're a murderer," Genki says, getting a bit scared now. "How...? Aren't you supposed to be in prison?" Tsuki laughs. "Parole, kid. Anyways, never really seen you in person. What's your name again...? Gen...?" "Genki. You're..." "Tsuki. Your beloved big brother-" "Hell no!" Genki backs away. "Look. Get the hell away from me. I've seen you, watching me these past few... everything! What do you want?" Tsuki laughs again, grating, grating sound against her ears. "What? Can't even look at my own little sister?" "Absolutely not. Go fuck yourself." "What? We just met and you're telling me off?" Genki shakes her head. "You're a damn criminal. I will NOT associate myself with the likes of you - now if you'll excuse me, I have CLASS-" He grabs her by the shoulder and presses his lips against hers. For a moment, Genki is a stunned, unable to react, but as her thoughts return she pushes him away. "What the fuck-?" "I'll make this quick," Tsuki cuts her off. "I'm single. Lonely. You don't wanna see your big brother-" "Cut it out with that big brother crap! You're not my brother, I only have one, and that's-" "Fuyuki? Oh, he's much more pliant compared to you, isn't he? But that's what makes me... endear you. You're so much more feisty, more personality." "I-" "Back to the point. Nobody likes me around here." "And what makes you think I do?!" "Well? We're family. You share my blood. My dirty, murderer blood." "That's not true. We're not even-" "Fully related? That's true. I guess you're only half murderer." "Cut it out!" "No." Genki grits her teeth. What an infuriating bastard. Not even anyone else comes close to this level of... of... "Look, Gen," Tsuki sighs. "I just want someone to spend time with little ol me. Don't you pity me?" Genki narrows her eyes. Maybe... maybe. He's... kind of making her feel bad. "Fine. What do you want?" Oh, but how wrong a decision that is.

Genki buries her face in her hands as Tsuki pulls away, cigarette smoke filling the hotel room. Bite marks over her exposed shoulders where the covers can't hide her shame. "Well? That wasn't so bad, was it?" Dirty. So dirty. This murderer ... and her. "You did a great job there, sis. Don't mope about it. Poison isn't so bad. At least he died quickly. Painlessly." "Painlessly? Really?" They're not so different, are they?

#hnk #houseki no kuni #lotl #whump #cw incest #hnk phos #phoscest #asks #writing requests

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hezuart · 1 year

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Are you a shipper?

I ??? I suppose- I guess so??? Yes?? ///

~~~~

Here's a list of ships I like that no one asked for

List of ships I think should be canon due to story setup & chemistry (But I also appreciate that the story would focus on plot more than a relationship. Don’t always agree with how these characters are written at certain points though)

Rukia x Ichigo (BLEACH) Two misfits with a death wish from different worlds who find each other and learn how to live. Rukia gives Ichigo closure and reconnection with his estranged family that kept secrets from him, along with giving him closure with his mother. Ichigo teaches Rukia, a soul reaper who never got a chance to live IRL, a soup reaper part of the cold-blooded Kuchiki family, how to live. While Rukia teaches Ichigo about the new aspects of death and all the ghosts he’s been surrounded by as a child that he’s never understood before now. They’re two sides of the same coin. The hero and the heroine of the series.

(Also Orihime x Uryuu from BLEACH because they both lost a beloved family member when they were young and have been living alone ever since. They're both fantastic seamstresses, they believe in each other when no one else does, they've protected each other, and they spend a majority of a season together. Uryu drops everything to save her in season 2, and he has the most chemistry and reason to do so outside of anyone else. Orihime often compliments him and makes him blush too.)

Blake x Sun (RWBY) Both faunus with somewhat opposite personalities that play off each other. Blake is a broody book worm while Sun is almost a literal ray of sunshine. He has a few flirty moments with her. He follows her home knowing she tends to run off by herself, challenging her fear of hurting others I think? He spends a good season assisting her in tracking down her old terrorist group and even meets her parents. She kisses him on the cheek after they depart. Good friends with the potential for something more (If they were written a little more consistently.... its been a while since I watched RWBY so I might revise my opinions later)

Ruby x Oscar (RWBY) It's Red Riding Hood’s silver eyes (aka silver slippers) for Dorothy’s salvation. To help her get home. The analogy and parallels behind their stories are fascinating. They’re both the youngest of the group with the heaviest burdens on their shoulders. So far they’ve been pretty cute, wholesome, and over all supportive of each other.

Izuku x Ochaco (My Hero Academia) Not a big fan of this show but it's the first canonical (?) shounen pairing that has actual chemistry to me. Izuku is a good friend to her and gets flustered when she's close to him. They both give each other great Christmas gifts to showcase they know each other well. Where Ochaco is actually useful and supportive and has a crush on Izuku but has goals and friends outside of him, and both of them prefer to focus on a career rather than have time for a romance during the series.

Charlie x Alastor (Hazbin Hotel) I won’t disrespect Charlie x Vaggie, but Vaggie shoots down Charlie’s ideas and personality. She doesn’t partake in the singing, dancing, or the hopeful and innocent attitude. She’s bossy and nonindulgent of Charlie, albeit simply because she wants to protect her and reel in her ideas. Alastor on the other hand is just as eccentric and carefree. They’re both charmers, centers of attention. Performance artists. Alastor has the potential to corrupt Charlie while Charlie has the potential to purify Alastor. We could see a relationship develop onscreen, where as Charlie and Vaggie are pre-established and unlikely to get attention drawn to how they actually ended up as a couple. Even Viv herself initially claimed it “just happened over time as they started out as friends”, even though Vaggie was originally Angel’s girlfriend, believe it or not. Charlie and Vaggie are the main and only ship for Hazbin though. I just don’t care about them as much as I would if Charlie had something develop with Alastor.

Stolas x Blitz (Helluva Boss before season 2) Scumbag disasters. Prince and the Pauper. Cheaters. Liars. Unhappy guys with romantic baggage issues. Start off as work-fuckbuddies but start falling in love and then at that moment, everything falls apart around them. It's messy, its bloody, its angsty, there were staKES, I'm SO SMAD-

The Harry Potter series isn’t something I’m a dedicated fan of, especially after Rowling, but Harry x Hermoine made way more sense to me from the movies. Scorpius x Albus in the Cursed Child was rectified; the subtext hints it's now canon which thank god they fixed because Scorpius x Rose was terrible. Albus had a crush on Delphi which, yeah, who wouldn’t have a crush on Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Way? But I prefer those two probably as a brotp. Delphi has lesbian vibes(and she’s over a decade older than Albus, so). Albus Potter befriending his dad's enemies? Like it's great. It breaks the cycle. It's a new beginning. A new family. All the HP kids being gay/LGBTQ+ is just really funny to me. Fuck you, Rowling (There’s an HP crackship I actually like a… lot, but I’m too embarrassed to say what it is aloud. It's a spicy angsty unhealthy ship...)

Otherwise crack ships: White Zangetsu x Black Tensa (BLEACH) Angel God vs. Devil God enemies turned roommates. One is feral and the other is reserved but both are equally dangerous and creepy in their own right. (used to like Ichigo x Zangetsu but now I’ve kinda lost interest because Ichigo’s personality changed. Otherwise interchangeable GrimmjowxZangetsuxIchigo I guess. And Harribel x Neliel. Sweet & silent level 3 Espada girls. Neliel is the gal Harri’s missing for her group. She deserves another queen at her side!)

Roxas x Vanitas (Kingdom Hearts) Also don't mind these two also just being a platonic brotp. But Roxas and Vanitas are both remnants of Sora & Ventus with faces that aren't their own. They both can summon monstrous beings, they've been through pain, and they've always been second to someone else. They were both manipulated and lied to. They both wanted access to Kingdom Hearts for power, for a wish to be whole again in one way or another. They're both half of someone else and this makes them struggle with their identities. Roxas however has a joy for life. He has friends and jobs to keep him busy. Vanitas on the other hand hates life. He has nothing to live for because he's always in so much pain and thinks friends would drag him down. Roxas wants life and freedom. Vanitas wants death and/or fusion. Two kins with opposite desires. Could they save each other or destroy each other? There's so much dramatic potential here. Literary gold.

Namine x Xion (Kingdom Hearts) Wish these girls had more personality and chemistry, but I think they've got a gothic x pastel prep vibe going on. Xion was a puppet controlled by the Organization and Namine was controlled by the same Organization, just a different branch and for a somewhat different reason. Xion can copy & steal powers and Namine can rearrange memories, making them both potentially scary if they were to fight back together. I think they are the only two that would ever understand each other.

(Dib x Zim ..??? or just Brotp because of reasons like Roxas x Vanitas. Basically two opposite beings with similar upbringing or social status, both arrogant hotheads with unmatched intellect. All they want is approval, acceptance, and praise. Which they will never receive from their worlds that reject them. They are the only ones who take each other seriously. When Dib gives up on paranormal hunting, Zim becomes depressed and rots away in his house until Dib returns. Zim even seeks Dib’s help with sabotaging Tak & the Planet Jackers. They could be great friends, if they weren’t on opposite sides. If they joined forces, they’d be unstoppable. Jack Frost x Pitch Black (Rise of the Guardians) Also don't mind them being just brotp. Both lonely and lost in their bleak immortal lives, rejected by everyone else around them. Their powers can be dangerous to children if given the wrong influence, like Pitch's. In the books, they both share a similar past. Both were warriors of light. A light that flickered out and changed them into what they are now due to a tragic loss of some kind. Jack is youthful, silly, but observant while Pitch is old, dramatic, and charming. It's like giving your old dog a new puppy. At first they're annoyed, but then they slowly start being more active to play with the puppy? Not sure that's a good analogy. But Pitch said what goes together better than "cold and dark", while "fear and fun" work just as well together. Thrill rides & Halloween? A lot of adrenaline junkies out there would love what these two could come up with together.

Lost my mind at the Jevil x Spamton (Deltarune) shenanigans, implying they’re divorced exes. It’s so funny. Otherwise Jevil x Seam, estranged magicians is pretty nice too.

Other honorable crack ship mentions I won’t explain: Peridot x Lapis(SU) , Pearl x Bismuth(SU) though honestly I even wonder if that's considered crack cuz.... them ladies.... they like each other... so obvious..., Charlie x Helsa (Hazbin Hotel) , Hiccup x Jack Frost (HTTYD & ROTG crossover) , Nicole x Sally (Sonic Archie) , Mettaton x Papyrus??? for some reason?? (Undertale), Also not crackship but Marceline x Bubblegum I’m just not a big fan of Adventure Time to mention it, not crackship but Chat Noir x Ladybug… if they were written well … , Gaz x Tak because why not… goth girls that slay (Invader Zim)... Also not crack ship probably some ships from Star vs the Forces of evil but I haven't watched that show in a long while and the ships got out of hand at the end.... also like Kallen x Lelouch (Code Geass) but genuinely think Lelouch is Aro Ace and therefore think he's perfect alone... and probably a handful of others I’ve forgotten about or just am not a big enough fan of the series or ship to really name

Though I was hanging out with @ciipher-arts the other day and we just??? Discovered??? An incredibly rare ship??? Sonia x Mina? (Sonic Archie x Underground) I feel like I just had my eyes opened. Omygod the internet is sleeping on this crackship. genius

Anyway u h

dont judge me too hard pls or i will cry

#ships #shipper #multi fandom #ask #text post #long post

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justmybookthots · 9 months

Text

My Top 30 Books of 2023

30. An Ember in the Ashes (#1) by Sabaa Tahir

Such a terrific debut!!!! I loved it. From the moment Laia signed on to spy on the military academy, I was hooked. Premise was intriguing as heck, and Elias' mother was fascinating to me. Some small things I didn't love, however—I wished Laia had been more involved in the trials. Elias, the MMC, felt a bit weak of a character to me, and I wasn't a fan of Helene (I like her so much more in the sequel, though). The ending left the story at such an exciting place, and I was hankering for the next book.

29. Red Winter (#1) by Annette Marie

We're at the midway point of my ranking, and from here on out it's books I mostly really enjoyed. Red Winter!! The first book!! When I read it, my mind was kinda blown because it felt like I was reading a very well-written novel spinoff of Kamisama Kiss/Inuyasha, and I loved both series as a child. Also, the illustrations in the novel are soooo good, and Shiro the MMC/fox is cute. ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡) It was a solid book, and I had a blast, BUT— this is not the best Annette Marie has to offer. Nope. I will get to her magnum opus (for me)... eventually.

28. Check & Mate by Ali Hazelwood

I shouldn't have spoken so soon about the midway point. This book… was very hard to rank. The beginning had me deliciously invested (and is what establishes such a high rank) but my interest languished the more the book progressed. I actually think people who like SJM may like this one because it's pretty much a power fantasy, but make it contemporary. Regardless, I did have a good time if I ignored the power fantasy elements. Sawyer was a great hero, and Mallory was nicely tortured, which is just how I like my heroines. :)

27. The Housemaid's Secret (The Housemaid #2) by Freida McFadden

Ah, the sequel to the Housemaid! Not as good as the prequel, but still pretty good!!! I think the themes it covered didn't hit me as hard as the Housemaid did, but the story stayed with me longer than some of Freida's other works. Overall a solid sequel, but I don't think it could have really lived up to what the Housemaid did for me.

26. A Good Girl's Guide to Murder by Holly Jackson

I'm not a huge fan of Jackson's writing style or the characterisation of Ravi and his brother, but the mystery was so good! I loved the themes it covered and the psyche of the victim.

This mystery is quite fleshed out and goes in depth about abuse, sexism, etc. I disliked the main leads, but enjoyed the case and the reveal. I was much more invested in the victim than I was in the person who was wrongly accused of murdering her, even though I think we were supposed to care for both?

Anyway, it's definitely a much more memorable thriller than the ones below the ranking of this list so far.

25. A Kiss of Iron by Clare Sager

Another book that's kind of hard to rank for me. The romance was reaaaally good at the start, and then somewhere it kind of lost me?? But the story was interesting and I LOVED the plot twist (!!!!!) at the end, and the smut was one of my favourites. Also, the hero did something so sweet in the second half of the book. ♡ That aside, while this may be a fae book, I just don't think this is anything like how fae should be in my head. It doesn't feel like I'm reading fae at all.

24. If You Could See the Sun by Ann Liang

AH, Henry, my beloved!!!!!! My first book of Ann Liang's, and it was so cute and Henry was just!!! Almost!!! Everything!! The Chinese rep also made me so happy!!! It depresses me that I couldn't love it as much as I wanted to because the story was riddled with issues towards the end but I loved the rest of it. This book walked so that the other book of Ann's could run! (We will see that other book along the list soon.)

23. Six of Crows (Six of Crows #1) by Leigh Bardugo

If my friend saw this list, she'd go: "SoC, in 23rd place? DISOWNED". To that, I say…

Sowwieee.

I LOVE the Crows, but it's not this book that definitively sealed the deal about them to me. This is 100% my personal gripe because my brain hates setting-centric books and it was so hard for me to figure out the logistics behind the heist. But I loved the banter in this book, Kaz's brains, Inej’s badassery, and the revelation about Jesper being Grisha. Also Wylan, my baby. My love.

Ahhhhh, can't talk about the Crows or I'll start to melt. Make a TV show that ADAPTS THE ICE HEIST ALREADY.

22. City of Bones (Mortal Instruments #1) by Cassandra Clare

OMG, it just occurred to me that if the same friend saw this being ranked above SoC, she's really going to have an aneurysm. 🤣

I'm not going to elaborate other than the fact that I had a fun and easy time with this book, even if it was far from perfect. It actually exceeded my (admittedly) very low expectations, lol. In any case, I've already written a more in-depth review of it.

21. One Dark Window by Rachel Gillig

A really, really solid book. I loved the concept of magical cards in the worldbuilding. While it doesn't do anything groundbreaking, nor was I extremely invested in the leads, I consider this very well-done. I loved Elm, lol. However, I've yet to read the second book and I hope to get on it soon.

20. The Perfect Son by Freida McFadden

I loved this thriller!!! But this is mostly because I am VERY partial to psychopathic boys written in the way Liam was—and at the same time, you realise: are real psychopaths that easy to spot? Is he really a psychopath, or is it someone else? This is probably one of my favourites from Freida, and the ending… made me so nervous, lol.

19. How the King of Elfhame Learned to Hate Stories by Holly Black

A short novella written by Holly Black, with vignettes set in Cardan's POV as he grew up over the years. I fucking loved it to pieces, but that's just because I love Cardan 😛 I loved how the stories the hag told Cardan kept changing to fit his narrative, I loved seeing his perspective when Nicasa cheated on him with Locke, I loved hearing about how he felt towards Jude. Also: the last chapter, set after Queen of Nothing!! Him and Jude!!!!!! My heart!!!!!!! I will not elaborate except that it was fucking amazing. The only downside was that it was too short, and I could have done with MORE scenes.

18. Last of the Talons by Sophie Kim

It's a novel that does very little wrong. Its only sin is that it's predictable and formulaic, but it was such a wholesome and at times swoony story because Rui (the goblin emperor) was lovely. While I didn't love Lina, the heroine, I thought the book was still fun, and THAT scene by the river was ( ◡‿◡ *). I'll be reading the sequel once it's out.

17. The Serpent and the Wings of Night by Carissa Broadbent

I have so many conflicting feelings about this book. See, this is the book that got me into reading fantasy this year. For so long, I'd avoided fantasy, but after I finished this, I decided I'd give the rest of the genre a try. It literally rearranged my entire brain and opened something in me—it was sooooo good. The slow burn, the trials, the eventual consummation, the ending… I can't fault it. Almost every other fantasy book I've read has this one to thank (and Kingdom of the Wicked to blame because it almost made me boycott the genre, lol). However—the problem is that I've read it so long ago (at the start of the year) that I can't remember much, and also that the sequel bored me to tears and I still haven't finished that. If I ranked this earlier in the year, it might be much higher in the ranks.

16. Emily Wilde's Encyclopaedia of Faeries by Heather Fawcett

This book!!!!!! It was so unexpected how much I enjoyed it. A lot of reviews were complaining about the verbiage and how nothing was really happening and I… went into it thinking I wouldn't like it, if I'm being honest. But I did!!!!!!!!!!! It portrayed fae similarly to the Folk of the Air series (The Cruel Prince), and instead of boring me like the Enchantment of Ravens did, I was HOOKED. I loved how it kept me on my toes, I loved how creepy some things were… and I thought Wendell was insane and so much fun (insane he might be, but you cannot deny his untouchable EQ). Also, Emily is such a dear. I must add that Reverse grumpy/sunshine is my FAVOURITE. I could go on and on about this book. It's marvellous and I'm so desperate for the sequel. In fact, I think I'm going to do a reread of this book before the sequel comes out. 🙂

15. Delivering Evil for Experts (Guild Codex: Demonized #4) by Annette Marie

OMG, OMG… We have finally reached the Guild Codex: Demonized series.

(*ﾉдﾉ)

Now THIS series is, as far as I'm concerned, Annette's magnum opus. Not Red Winter. THIS. Don't mock the goofy-ass cover—it's a GEM UNDERNEATH! IT'S AMONG MY FAVOURITE BOOKS OF ALL TIME. It's one of the holy trinity series (yes, that's what I'm dubbing those three series) that broke my brain this year. This action series is about a girl (Robin) who makes a contract with a demon, Zylas, where he has to protect her in exchange for... her baking cookies for him. 🤣 It sounds ridiculous, but I promise it all makes sense when you read it. Unfortunately, this is the last book, which was my least favourite of the series because the tension had started to ebb for me. BUT. It's still so, so good. The ending was initially gearing up to be a tragedy but ahhh!! I am content with how it ended.

14. City of Ashes (Mortal Instruments #2) by Cassandra Clare

Never would I have thought this book would be higher than one of the books from Guild Codex: Demonized but I really, unexpectedly enjoyed City of Ashes. It was better than the first; I thought it was a solid and frankly speaking great book. I did hear, however, that the first 3 books in this series are actually decent before the rest nose-dives in quality, which explains why I enjoyed the first 2 so much. (I've already written a full review on this book.)

13. The Queen of Nothing (Folk of the Air #3) by Holly Black

We have finally reached the Cruel Prince series. *hyperventilates*

Okay. Okay.

So.

The last book is my least favourite of the trilogy, but… it is also the culmination of Jude and Cardan's relationship. We have "By you, I am forever undone" here. (There's even more quotes, technically, but I'm trying to keep this succinct.) It is legendary. It is magnificent. It is immaculate. Overall, the plot in this book may be my least favourite, but the payoff after two books of scheming and constant push and pull? Fucking chef's kiss.

12. The Only One Left by Riley Sager

One of the best thrillers of 2023 for me. It is so, so, so good. I don't think I can stress how brilliant this book is. Story revolves around a mute, sick old lady wheelchair-bound inside a gothic manor on a cliff. The main character is sent to be her caretaker. And the old lady has a story to tell—she was accused of murdering her entire family in her youth. Very atmospheric and chilling read.

See, I expected the first plot twist but the SECOND? Wowza. Magnifique. Also such a sad, tragic tale. It felt me reeling for a good bit after I was done. It deserved to win the 2023 GR awards and NOT Housemaid's Secret. It's not even close to me.

11. The Housemaid by Freida McFadden

This book. This fucking book.

It broke me out of a reading slump at the start of the year but that's not why it's left such an indelible mark on my brain. The way this story covers infidelity and abuse… Wow. Exquisite. And the way the tables turn at the end is so good it's ILLEGAL.

In fact, I think the theme here just hit closer to home for me than The Only One Left, even though the writing of the latter is definitely superior. This is my first book of Freida's and is, to me, her best work.

10. The Maid's Diary by Loreth Anne White

[Takes deep breath] This story was so unexpected for me. I wasn't expecting to like it. At all. It was supposed to be a palate cleanser.

A palate cleanser, I thought! HA!

This wasn't perfect. There were plot holes. Some things weren't wrapped up. BUT. BUT. BUT. It is the best thriller I read this year and I stand by that. I have never, ever felt more vindicated by a book than I did this one. It is a work of art.

One line to sum this story up? I SUPPORT WOMEN'S WRONGS. That’s it. That's all you need to know. (That said: Full review has been written)

9. Hunting Fiends for the Ill-Equipped (Guild Codex: Demonized #3) by Annette Marie

We are in the top ten now. Gird your loins!

This book!!!!!! Ahhhh. I can't even write this coherently, and I'm only at the ninth. But this was the book where the relationship between Zylas and Robin finally began to change!!!!!!! It was so divine, it was near perfect, it made me scream and want to tear my hair out—I can't. This was a slow-burn done right. It was just a little hint of what was to come, and yet… yet it short-circuited my brain. Also, I do not APPRECIATE the emotional turmoil Annette put me through with this one.

8. This Time It's Real by Ann Liang

🥺 At this point, my writing is going to be incoherent. Because these are my absolute favourites. I'm crying. I'm seriously crying. This book was everything to me (even though a friend read it and she said the guy was too perfect for her liking and I get it. I really do. I agree. But... I loved it).

(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

I have nothing coherent to say except I loved it. And that, much as I didn't want to admit it, this stupid book put me in a reading slump for 2 months. I found myself constantly trying to find books with similar tropes as this: celebrity/non-celebrity, Asian rep, cute swoony contemporary romance. I couldn't find anything that hit the same way.

7. The Cruel Prince (Folk of the Air #1) by Holly Black

Do I need to say more? DO I?????????

I took a gamble buying the whole boxset before reading it and I thought I was fucked because usually that means I'm going to hate it. Fate isn't normally this kind to me. But my gamble paid off. It fucking paid off!

The prose, the political intrigue, my first venture into fae… Also, Jude's spite is low-key TOO relatable: “If I cannot be better than them, I will become so much worse.”

Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before, unafraid to reference or not reference, put it in a blender, shit on it, vomit on it, eat it, give birth to it—

6. Love, Theoretically by Ali Hazelwood

This, above Cruel Prince? Yes, it feels illegal, but here's why: Cruel Prince is only the first book. We don't get the payoff yet. In Love Theoretically, you get everything from start to finish. It's like a whole ass trilogy in one book.

And the slow-burn in the first half of this book is LEGENDARY. I was actually kicking my feet like a teenager. That in itself is monumental, because I'd stopped enjoying/reading contemporary romance for at least a year before this book came. I'd actually given up on the genre/demographic at some point… until this.

Jack is one of my favourite male leads to ever exist. And the themes the book covers with Elsie hits so close to home for me. It's not perfect, but belong to my top ten it does.

5. Slaying Monsters for the Feeble (Guild Codex: Demonized #2) by Annette Marie

The top five books are really, really cutting it close, because this book is, in my opinion, near perfection. It's INSANE how Annette could carry the momentum from a perfect first book and make it just as exciting as the predecessor. The action scenes were phenomenal, and I loved the makeshift family between the three leads and the cat. Also Zylas' characterisation and the exploration of his psychopathy was so INCREDIBLE. I can go and on about this book forever. I still remember reading this on the toilet and going: "HOW IS THIS SO GOOD?"

IT'S A WORK OF ART.

4. The Wicked King (The Folk of the Air #2) by Holly Black

The best book in the Cruel Prince series to me. The mind games, the scheming, Jude's machinations, the twists, the ENDING, I could scream. Jude is a force to be reckoned with. And the tension between her and Cardan? Sublime. Throughout the whole book, Jude has him under her control, but she knows time is ticking and he'll break free of the magic soon. The suspense and the push and pull is…

ლಠ益ಠლ)

Another work of fucking art. I only have so many adjectives to praise this bona fide masterpiece. But wait! I still have three more books.

3. The Stolen Heir by Holly Black

So many people would stare me down for this. The Stolen Heir (the spin-off sequel) above Cruel Prince? YES. OKAY? YES.

I prefer Jude to Wren (who is arguably a bigger force to be reckoned with in her own right), but. OAK. Almost nobody liked him, but I did. I DID. It's fine; I will be his only fan. No biggie.

Oak was everything that I felt Cardan—whom I already loved—lacked in. Oak… Ah, Oak. I just have a soft spot for sweet sunshine characters who are also secret badasses. It's like Holly plucked out the archetype I like in men and created Oak (okay, I don't love the hooves but that's beside the point). I adored this book with my beating heart and I just don't think the sequel can live up to it.

(I just read the first chapter of the sequel and I'm already shaking. Please don't let me down. I've been burned by too many sequels at this point.)

2. Taming Demons for Beginners (Guild Codex: Demonized #1) by Annette Marie

A masterpiece. That's what this first book is. Even the Stolen Heir and Wicked King had parts I didn't love, but this? It's *chef's kiss* from start to finish.

Every scene and exchange built towards a fantastic crescendo near the end when THAT contract was made. Gah. The delicate balance of comedy, tension and suspense was immaculate. And the magic in those scenes when Robin first stumbles upon Zylas inside the summoning circle is…

( ˘ ³˘)♥

I'm not going to pretend this book is a literary tour de force that's going to be analysed like Hunger Games is, or anywhere close to that. All I will say is that this was the first book that blew my socks off after my Cruel Prince-induced slump, and that says enough about it.

1. Crooked Kingdom (Six of Crows #2) by Leigh Bardugo

Remember when I said the last book was easy to place? The first book was also easy to place. This took almost NO contemplation at all.

Here we have the final one of my holy trinity series, alongside Folk of the Air and Demonized.

Since it wasn't so setting-centric like the first book, this sequel shone for me. I don't… I can't… There are no words. Kaz is a male Jude, but even smarter and more traumatised. Every Crow is majorly fleshed out, and they all get some kind of closure at the end. (One also… ends, but never mind that one.) It's so cathartic I could fucking cry; I nearly did. Kaz and Inej are forever etched in a special corner of my heart. This is not a book that I can give justice to by writing one or two paragraphs about, so I won't. I've already written all my thoughts in my review. All I will say is that it deserves all the hype it gets.

In fact, it deserves more.

SoC #3? 👉👈

#book blog #book review #the cruel prince #the stolen heir #crooked kingdom #six of crows #ali hazelwood #love theoretically

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smalltownfae · 2 years

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Realm of the elderlings and Vanitas no carte for the fandom game? 👀

Realm of the Elderlings

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most):

Beloved/The Fool, obviously. He isn’t only the RotE character I think about the most, he is the fictional character I think about the most in general. There is just so much to him! He contains multitudes. I love his kindness and adpatability and how he is not flawless, feeling very realistic instead. He feels like the main character because of his goals and appearances but he is observed by other main characters instead. It’s genius and beautiful and I can’t express my entire love for him without writing an essay and getting into spoilers so this will have to do.

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped):

BEE!!! Bee did nothing wrong. She is adorable and so right about most things even though she is a child. I might have a lot to complain about the Fitz and the Fool trilogy but I will never regret having read about Bee’s existence.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave):

Molly. I can’t take any more people in this fandom saying that she has no personality or that she is the one in the wrong all the time or that she is in the way of their ship. Molly is her own character and what a brilliant character that is. I love that Hobb still manages to make her shine even throught Fitz’s skewed perspective. She was abused by her father as a child, but she is still fiercely devoted to family. She is the character that feels the most normal in a world of magic but that in no way makes her less strong or important. She is the kind of woman that will put her family first and expects others to love her the same way and in the end forgives them when they don’t. She just deserves so much better treatment from this fandom that is too blinded by their love for Fitz.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week):

The prophet with the rooster crown. I can’t even explain why I love her so much and how that happened. I just find the untold story about her fascinating. She used to be a performer that came to be in the favour of dragons and elderlings so much that they honoured her and then she dies tragically thinking that she failed her mission and, worse, that she failed her catalist. I both want and not want a prequel about that story. I would love to read more about it, but at the same time I also like that so much of it remains a mystery.

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave):

I already answered something similar before, but Malta Vestrit in Ship of Magic. She was at her best most hilarious self and everyone can fight me on that. I am proud to be one of the few people that liked Malta from the start. Yes, she is stubborn and spoiled, but that same stubborness is what helps her family in the end.

Taking that away, I don’t think I have many characters the fandom hates and that I love (?) I do like Jinna and Regal though and find Hest funny sometimes.

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason):

Satrap Cosgo because he deserves it. Also, Hest, Reyn and Burrich, who also deserve it.

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell):

There are so many. Sooo many pieces of shit in this series. Even characters that are supposed to be good guys. So, here goes my list: Kyle Haven, Kennit, Sa’Adar, Sorcor, Lavoy, Torg, the Duke of Chalced, Brashen, Tats, Lant, the Four, Galen, Molly’s dad... I am probably forgetting characters but that is all that comes to mind right now.

Vanitas no Carte

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most):

Jeanne: She seemed cliché to me at first, but became more complex the more I read. She also makes me laugh with her confused feelings and mood changes. The series is still far from finished so my favourites can change, but so far she is on the top.

I think the vampire of the blue moon has a big chance of becoming my favourite, but I haven’t seen much of them yet and they are still a mystery.

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped):

Noé Archiviste. He is just adorable and I love him (even more on reread). His childlike behaviour of finding everything new wonderful and exciting because he lived sheltered for so long is very endearing.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave):

Dante. I quite like the Dhampir trio, but Dante especially. For starters I like that is design is a bit different from the usual model Mochizuki uses for every character, but I also tend to like the characters that appear to be doing everything for money while having an heart of gold deep down.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week):

I guess the Vampire of the blue moon fits given how little they showed up so far. But, also Louis de Sade and Parks Orlok (I liked him as soon as he played with Murr).

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave):

The Shapeless One. Not much info about him yet but I like the smiley misterious and creepy dudes. Plus, he takes on various identities??? I need to know more and he interests me deeply even if he does a lot of shady stuff.

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason):

Astolfo just because he is fun to torment. It’s so easy to get a reaction out of him and when Vanitas does so it’s hilarious. Olivier would also be fun.

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell):

Doctor Moreau 100%. Not only does he use children for his experiments, but he is also very very very annoying. He should die already.

I don’t hate her nearly as much as the one above, but Veronica de Sade. Also, for being mean and annoying (you can be evil, but not annoying).

Thank you for the ask :D

#rote #realm of the elderlings #vanitas no carte #the case study of vanitas #fandom asks

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demonsfate · 3 days

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angry/depressed/sad rant: do you think things will ever get better soon? every single day ever since tekken 6 first released it was always "jin the war criminal. jin the generic anime edgelord. jin mains are elitist tryhard and salty". almost everyone always still says he should be dead, in jail, or hated by everyone. people want miguel to be the last dlc character so he can kill him because jin is finally happy. people online says he is popular but with all the constant hate, slander, and h*tler/ww3 jokes i'm now starting to question even that. i still remember when someone on the youtube comments would harass some girl for shipping jin x xiaoyu or hwoarang x jin because something like, "it's problematic shipping japanese war criminal man with characters from china or south korea. don't you fucking weebs remember ww2, the Rape of Nanjing, or the south korean Comfort women. of course you don't you negative iq bitch, you only see hwoarang and xiaoyu as your precious jin's cute little s*x sl*ves." now they're comparing him to japanese war criminals in ww2 who did mass r*pe.

i also won't be suprised if reina or heihachi or even kazuya takes jin's spotlight and becomes the new face/poster child of tekken. not only because of tekken 6 damages - but also because of reina's popularity or heihachi coming back (he's harada's fav). jin being ooc in 6, then having no screentime in 7, and he was supposed to be redeemed in 8 but then they screwed that up and now he's being replaced again. sometimes i can't help but wish he died in tekken 5, harada and murray can have their beloved lars replace jin and jin's character would've never been ruined/tainted.

even though now we know it was all harada's fault, even though tekken 6 completely contradicts his entire personality in tekken 3-5 - most of the tekken fandom and outsiders still continue to slander him to this day or think his entire personality is tekken 6 jin (while ignoring who he was in tekken 3-5). i am a huge fan of Death Battle and one day i saw a fanfiction called "Aftermath: The DB Chronicles". i was instantly hooked and enjoyed reading the story for hours, i enjoyed seeing some of my other favorite characters like tifa from ffvii appear in the story and i couldn't wait to see jin. only to be absolutely disappointed when once again - he was just portrayed as his tekken 6 self, jin is just simply "edgy man who started ww3" and that's fucking it. not many people on the death battle subreddit ever actually talks about jin or tekken in general (they mostly talk about why Ben 10 should've beaten green lantern, glazing aizen/alucard/goku, wanting to fuck zatanna, making randomizer battle matchups, or shipping gojo with makima) but when they do well 50% it's about fucking "ww3/haha edgelord" (at least it's still nowhere near as bad as r/Tekken). over the years i'm not even mad about jin losing to ryu anymore, i'm actually more mad about the analysis section mentioning his actions in tekken 6 in the end like as if we didn't already know that already.

i still have other comfort characters in the tekken series (asuka and lili), and i also tend to go to my comfort characters from other fandoms as well (final fantasy vii, bleach, berserk, devil may cry, naruto). i still play jin to this day, but now i also spend less time looking up fanart or fanfic of him because what's the point. it's just going to be more discourse, people complaining about someone daring to like jin or ship him with anyone, and jokes about war. i want things to better for jin stans, but things still seem bleak tbh.

dear jin kazama fans/mains/stans: stay strong, please. you have my back. ;w;

those who compare fictional characters to real life tragedies are usually just trolls or lack all perception of reality. it's best to ignore them, but i get why it's hard sometimes. sometimes the stuff they say IS really fucked up.

honestly i don't think things will ever get better. at least, not soon. imo, there are / were only two ways that it could get better. that being 1) if 8 retconned 6 to blatantly state that jin was in no control of his actions (either he was brainwashed or possessed) but it's too late for that now since tk8 doubled down lol. and 2) if the series gets a full fledge reboot. like i'm talking hard reboot. and then, never make jin bad again. if they do that, then with the next 10 years, yeah, the haters will die down.

even though jin's characterization was "fixed" in tk8, unfortunately his story wasn't. and if he's still "guilty" of those crimes? if the game still acknowledges them? then... yeah. he'll always get hate for it.

anyway, it's just best to avoid fan content for jin. i usually do unless i just stumble across it. and even then, i just avoid reading the comments on said content -- because yeah, the hate or "jokes" do get draining after a long while. it's also why i have this blog, 'cos it's like my lil "safe space" to discuss jin's character & make content of him without having haters bitch in your ear about him starting WWIII or whatever LOL.

#✏️ - ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴏsᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏsᴛ // (ooc)#✏️ - ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ? // (inbox)

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writersaraheriksson · 2 years

Text

Short Story - Ghosts Beyond the Mirror

The Journals of Kowèn - a D&D story

Part I: Ghosts Beyond the Mirror

Husband, son, famous sculpture - kidnapped, prisoner, slave

These are the Journals of Kowèn - a story of a husband, son, famous sculpture turned prisoner and slave, who tries to find his way back to his former life in the loving embrace of his husband and family waiting for his return.

Beyond writing fantasy novels and short stories set in my fantasy world I play tabletop roleplaying games. Dungeons and Dragons (5e) is the game and is the birthplace of this story that follows Kowèn.

I introduced this character into my friend's homebrew campaign called Tales of TPK streamed over on Twitch.

For you RPG geeks like me, I have hidden several spells in this story. Perhaps you can find them and name them even? Can you figure out what class Kowèn belongs to?

Comment, vote, leave feedback, share - whatever warms this heart of mine and helps me get excited to bring you more of this story to life. <3

CONTENT WARNING - Some of the topics and themes of this story may be disturbing for some readers. Violence, manipulation, anxiety and harassment occur.

Where do I begin? Do I write of my fairytale childhood surrounded by my five sisters and my loving mother and father? Or do I tell the story of how I ended up in the comforting arms of my husband, Yorah? The one son father had wed to yet another man in Baster. Do I speak of the countless misunderstandings and conflicts arising between us because of who I love? What about the one thing that has kept me alive through this whole nightmare?

My former life... the life my mind replays as I sleep, was taken from the pages of a cheerful man filled with joy, determination, and love. The old me is a distant ghost, teasing me in a mirror just outside my reach.

Five years may not seem long, but five years is an age for the tormented and the people searching and longing for their beloved's return.

I suppose I begin with the things that have kept me alive, the people who were left behind as I left my home to create another sculpture for yet another customer. I have five siblings, and I was the middle child of my crazy and joyful family. I was the only boy in a home of girls. But I never did mind that. I loved it. They cared for me, and I grew up knowing love and friendship, which many never get to experience.

People described me as a man with a smile that lit up every room I entered. I loved being the center of attention in one way or another. Pranks and jokes followed in my wake. I was the never-ending toastmaster at weddings. And I was quite the charmer...

It dawned on me quite early on that I was interested in men, not women. Perhaps it was because of my sisters who always spoke about the cute guys they saw, or maybe it was because I've just been drawn to them. Either way, I never had to explain my feelings to anyone. Save for my father's slight disapproval. Other than him, everyone accepted me for who I loved. Compared to other countries in Auber, the Dominion actually accepts people of all sexual orientations. That may be the sole glimpse of promise my homeland has to offer...

I actually met my husband at a wedding for my older sister, Selicia. His name was Yorah, and I loved him with every part of my being. I still do. His charcoal dark hair reaching far beyond his shoulders and his intoxicating brown eyes drew me in fast. Yorah was unlike any other man I've met. He's the kind of person who makes everything come to a halt once he enters a room. At first, I was pretty intimidated by him and his presence, but I quickly realized that he just held that effect on people and I was more than willing to get pulled in.

I worked and traveled a lot during my first years as an adult. When I was a boy, my parents would find me building sandcastles and making clay sculptures. I don't know what it is, but shaping something from one thing to another has always spoken to me. I love creating things, and that's why I became a sculptor. I worked with clay, metals, and stone. Once people from other hamlets and cities saw my work at my home, I got a wave of requests thrown at me to create sculptures. People from all levels of society: nobles and mayors contacted me, and I gladly worked for them.

I don't like to brag, but there was no soul around that could do the things I did as a sculpture. No one alive, at least. I pour my heart and soul into my projects. I only wish I had understood the risks of not belonging to a specific family or guild. Or rather... I wish I hadn't let myself be as sought after as I became. I could have stayed in Baster and kept close to my loved ones. There are many things the ghosts beyond the mirror taunt me with...

Sculpting wasn't only my profession or an interest: it's a part of me. If someone took that away from me, I would be an empty, hollow shell. When I tried to settle down and focus on Yorah... I felt like a part of me was dying. I felt it and he saw it. I was slowly fading and my temper shifted. Small things aggravated me. Before it escalated, we brought it back into my life, which was the greatest mistake I've ever made.

KOWÈN'S PORTRAIT

#booklr #creative writing #amwriting #original writing #fantasy #angst #dungeons and dragons #short stories #master and servant #dnd story #gaslighting

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fe-fictions · 3 years

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I've always headcanon-ed that Dimitri ends up having a big loving family that consists of boys, but deep inside Dimitri longs for the chance of having a baby girl to spoil rotten with love. I imagine that when Byleth is again with child they think that they'll have another boy but in the end they're happily surprised with a cute little princess. I totally see Dimitri exploding with joy 🥺💕 If you want to, could you write about this? Thanks in advance, I love your stories 💕

(I was so excited to write this one ;; A ;; )

The king and queen of Faerghus had been blessed with a healthy and happy marriage, a beautiful kingdom, a reunited continent, and most importantly, a trio of handsome young boys.

The firstborn, Mikhail, came about shortly after the wedding day; it wasn’t long before they were expecting, which no doubt was in part due to Dimitri’s enthusiasm for his new wife. You, of course, were hardly complaining. It was a dream of both yours to have a big family, one that could be filled with joy and the safety that came with growing up in peaceful times.

Mikhail’s two younger brothers came after with only a few years between them. Sylvain referred to them quite fondly as the Three Musketeers, mainly due to their propensity for trouble and always off on some adventure, together.

Dimitri loved his sons deeply, as any proud father would. But now that you were expecting once more, nearly ten years later, it was quite clear there was something on his mind.

“Beloved,” He called to you one night, the two of you reading peacefully in bed, enjoying one of the last quiet nights you would have for a while. You looked over at him, a tired smile on your lips. You were not far from sleep.

“Yes, Dima?”

“What do you think our fourth child will be? A boy or a girl?” He asked you in the quiet, setting his novel on the nightstand.

“Well, if we follow the pattern from the last three…” You trailed off, running an absentminded hand over your baby bump, “I’d be more surprised if it weren’t another boy.”

“Do you want another boy?”

“I do miss having a little baby boy around…now that they’re all up on their feet and toddling around, they don’t want to snuggle as much…” You trailed off, glancing back, “Why do you ask?”

“Because, well…I don’t know. I suppose I might want something a little…different, you know?”

“You don’t want another boy?”

“I-it’s not that I don’t want another boy! If we have a fourth son I will be truly beyond joyful! You have already blessed me with three beautiful sons…I would be so very happy to have another.”

“It’s all right if you don’t want another boy,” You laughed, “So long as you aren’t disappointed if it is.”

“I could never be!” He gasped, borderline horrified that you could ever think he would be. “I-it’s more that…just…well… If we had a girl…I would be very happy.”

“You would be?” You beamed at him softly, “I didn’t know you wanted to have a little princess.”

“Well, I hadn’t given it much thought until I met Felix’s daughter, and Raphael’s… Ashe’s, too. They are all so very sweet and cute. And they always have such delicate dresses, and….I don’t know. I think it would be a nice experience, having a little girl running about. Perhaps one who looks like you, even…following us around like a little duckling, having tea time or teaching her to dance, or…”

“You’ve given this a lot of thought.” You laughed at his genuine sweetness, giving his shoulder a squeeze. “I think having a little girl around would be a wonderful thing. It would certainly be a change of pace from those three rapscallions we’ve got running about.”

“And they would be such good big brothers, too. They would protect her and be so gentle with their dear sister…. It makes my heart sing just to think of it, you know?”

“I think it’s a very sweet dream, there.” You mused, “I would certainly not be opposed to having a little girl a part of our family. Having a princess of Faerghus would be an excellent addition to the family. I’m sure that you would be her favorite parent. A daughter with a doting Papa is a perfect role for you.”

“Well…it may very well be little more than a sweet dream. I’m sure we’ll have another handsome young Blaiddyd prince join our ranks, soon.” He said with a fond smile, “Which, mind you, I would be very happy with.”

“Of course.” You rolled your eyes, putting out the oil lamp and settling in for the night. Dimitri helped ease you onto your back, making sure you were nice and snug and as comfortable as a nine month pregnant woman could be, before following suit.

“I will be thrilled with any child you give me, Byleth. No matter what.” He kissed you tenderly, wrapping his arms around your waist for a proper night’s sleep.

“But you’d be happiest if it’s a girl…right?”

“I didn’t say that.” He huffed, “Forget I said anything…I fear I’ve opened myself up to plenty more teasing than I should have.”

“It’s just such a cute idea…I can’t help myself.” You giggled, cupping his cheek. “Goodnight, Papa.”

“Hmph.”

-------------------------

“Papa, Papa! Is the baby here yet?”

“Is Mama okay?”

“Can we see her?!”

Dimitri had been pacing outside the delivery room for ages. Hardly three days had passed since your conversation on princes and princesses, before you went into labor with the fourth Blaiddyd child.

He’d been quite worried; you were struggling with the labor, more so than the last three. He racked his brain, trying to think of why that was. All three of your sons had been more relaxed births, and the struggle to deliver them was much shorter.

But you'd been in labor for almost 12 hours straight…he couldn’t imagine the pain you were in.

Mercedes had been flittering in and out of the delivery room all day long, trying to reassure the King while also doing her best to keep you safe and healthy throughout the process.

“She’s almost ready to push, milord,” Mercedes had said to him, “She’s had a hard time so far, but…the worst may be behind us soon!”

That was hours ago.

The boys were done with their tutoring, Mikhail leading along his six- and four-year-old brothers were bouncing along with him like energetic little puppies, wondering what was happening with their mother.

Dimitri did his best to keep a brave face, but it was clear to Mikhail, at least, that his father was very, very worried about his mother.

“The baby isn’t here yet, boys.” Dimitri managed a tight smile, “We cannot visit Mama until then. We must be patient.”

“Is she okay?” Mikhail asked shyly, fidgeting at the thought that something was going wrong with his mother. He hated the thought. The prince was smart, and Dimitri knew that, but…he would not let the children see him more upset than he already was.

So instead of telling him the truth, which was that he did not know, he only smiled.

“Of course she is, Mikhail. Mama is very strong, and she has done this many times. Three times, in fact,” He tousled each blonde mop of hair, earning giggles from his little sons. “So let’s be patient, all right? We should hear from the nurses any-”

“King Dimitri!”

Annette popped out of the room, face flushed and eyes sparkling. Dimitri rushed to her, hope and fear intermingled in his voice.

“My wife…i-is she…?”

“She’s all right!” Annette assured him, “She made it through delivery, and you have another Blaiddyd on your hands!”

“Oh!” Dimitri pressed a hand to his forehead, feeling all the relief crash over him at once. The three boys cheered behind him, tackling their father’s legs.

“Yay! Another Blaiddyd!”

“Little brother!!”

“More brothers!!”

“Just one more,” Dimitri smiled tiredly, looking back to Annette, “May I see her, now?”

“She’s been asking for you since the baby was born,” She laughed, “But you should brace yourself.”

“W-why?”

She grinned, “I didn’t say anything about a little brother, did I?”

Dimitri’s heart stopped. His mouth fell open, staring at Annette. The woman only pushed him inside, taking the lhree princes from the door and ushering them outside. “Just a little while more,” She told htem, “And then you can see your Mama.”

Dimitri needed to see her, first.

The king was nearly tripping over himself, striding into the room with a wide eye and thunder in his chest. You were lying there, in clean clothes and freshly changed sheets, looking utterly exhausted. But you had that same winning smile you had every time Dimitri came into the delivery room, with a beautiful little bundle in your arms. Everything was fine, and you had made it through another successful delivery.

But this one was different.

“I couldn’t wait to see you.” You smiled at him, offering a hand for him to take. He crossed the room and took your hand quickly, “I wanted you to meet your daughter.”

Daughter.

“What?”

Daughter?

He stared at the bundle of blankets, finding a petite, pink face peeking out. A tuft of dark hair peeked out, with sweet blue eyes staring up at him.

“It’s…i-it’s a girl?” He managed, his voice cracking with emotion. You nodded, squeezing his hand. “We h-have a little girl?”

“We have a little girl.” You confirmed, gently pulling back the blanket just enough so he could get an even better look at the sweet baby gurgling in your hands. He couldn’t have stopped those tears from flowing if he wanted to.

“Sothis be praised…oh, gods, look at her…s-she’s so…oh, Byleth, she’s so beautiful!” He whispered, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest. You laughed, his joy as infectious as it was, adorable.

“She’s the reason why my labor was so much more difficult. According to Mercedes, girls have a tendency to be a harder delivery than boys. But we’re both healthy, and after an extended rest, I should be back on my feet in no time.”

“That is a great relief. I was so worried.” He murmured, kissing your forehead. His hand came to rest over his daughter’s blankets, nearly swallowing the girl beneath the sheer size of it compared to her tiny body. “She’s so delicate…a-and small…were all the boys this little?”

“They were certainly more round. She’s a bit on the smaller side, but Annette assured me she’ll get big and strong in no time.”

“Of course.” He agreed, touching her tiny cheek with a cautious finger. She was as soft and warm as she should be, he decided, his heart swelling with such adoration for this tiny new royal. “I am…so proud of you, Byleth. She’s absolutely gorgeous. You did wonderfully.”

“I can’t take all the credit,” You laughed, leaning into his chest, “She’s your daughter, too. And I’m sure you’re dying to hold her, too, aren’t you?”

He looked like an excited, giant puppy. “I-if it’s al right with you, I would love to!”

Carefully you settled her into her father’s arms, nearly disappearing behind his thick arms. Dimitri cradled her as though she were a most precious creation; which, as far as either of you were concerned, she absolutely was.

“Hello, little one…my daughter. My little girl…” He whispered, tears threatening to fall all over again. Dimitri clutched her close to him, filled with pride at the very sight of his precious princess.

He kissed her forehead, earning a curious squeak and huff from the drowsy newborn. He sank into the pillows beside you, settling her onto his chest where his heart thumped full of joy.

It was clear as day that man was going to be head over heels for his little girl ‘til the day he died; and likely wrapped around her teeny tiny fingers, too.

The peace wouldn’t last, of course, when the boys were allowed in to meet their little sister. They were excited to start training with her and teaching her how to fight like true warriors (whatever that meant).

You were just glad that they all were thrillled about having a little sister. You worried they might not be happy at first, since they all assumed it’d be another brother to tousle with.

But it seemed all four of your boys were on the same page; having a little sister was easily the best thing that could have happened to them.

Of that there was absolutely no doubt.

#dimitri #byleth #fe 16 #fire emblem three houses #fe3h #dimileth #dimitri x byleth #f!byleth #fe fictions #fe-fictions #family fluff #pregnancy fluff #pregnancy prompt #big family dima #its my favorite headcanon

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aruuq · 3 years

Text

Gifts Headcanons – Tokrev Characters; Advent Calendar Day 9

characters: angry, baji, benkei, chifuyu, draken, emma, hanma, inupi, izana, kakucho, kazutora, kokonoi, mikey, mitsuya, ran, rindou, sanzu, senju, shinichiro, smiley, takemichi, wakasa x gn!reader

genre & style: fluff

word count: 2.4k

notes: from now on i’ll probably leave the missing days in the calendar be, ‘cause some of them are not in my mind to be finished right now, and it blocks me from doing the other ones. so i’ll try to post the ones that are supposed to be posted on the particular days as it should be, and i’ll just simply post the missing ones when i finish writing them (still want to keep it before the end of December, so do not worry, i will, hopefully, get this)

warnings: mention of food, cigarettes, tiny spoilers from bonten future (inupi, draken and kakucho’s workplaces)

event’s masterlist │ other gifts headcanons: gnshn ┃ hq ┃ jjk

❄ Takemichi buys you something really cute and really suiting you. It may be a small and adorable piece of jewelry, a cute teddy bear reminding him of you, or literally anything. He puts lots of thoughts into choosing a perfect gift that will make you happy. For sure he asks Chifuyu for a bit of help, so the present ends up being packed in polka dot paper with some Christmas themed ribbon around.

❄ Mikey buys you tens of packs of your favorite sweets. When he gives them to you, neatly packed in a big box with red ribbon around it, he jokingly says that you can share what’s inside. By which he means, there’s almost no candies left for you and your poor stomach. And if you don’t like sweets at all, that’s even better! (for him) But, even though Mikey sometimes is a douche, he still hides a little trinket that reminds him of you somewhere in these sweets for you to find later.

❄ We’ve been able to see the way Draken chooses gifts for his beloved ones. He buys you something you’ve told him about in the past that you really want to have or something he’s seen you looking a second too long for just checking it out in a shop. It doesn’t matter if he’s known about it for a few days or a year. No matter if it's something considered practical or a stupid trinket. He'll get it for you. Anything to please his beloved significant other.

❄ I know that it might be an easy answer, but what can I tell you… Mitsuya makes himself a gift for you, and since he’s a literal god if it comes to sewing, my next words should be obvious. He makes you your favorite piece of clothing. And since he’s sure that you are sure of what he has prepared for you, he also buys you your favorite sweets/snacks and puts them at the top of the bag, so at first it looks like they are filling the whole container. At least he tries to make this gift a surprise for you.

❄ Chifuyu is a precious boy who wants to share his passion with you by giving you something close to his heart. He buys you a few of his favorite copies of mangas, and wraps them individually in a brown paper. On each package he writes “open when…” and gives you recommendations for all sorts of situations in your life when this particular title feels like a perfect choice to read. He also puts tons of sticky notes inside and writes on them his thoughts about particular parts of the story, or characters, or anything that may catch your attention, so it feels as if he’s reading it with you.

❄ I don’t know why but I really see Baji buying you a little trinket or piece of jewelry, definitely something pocket-size, but then, when he goes to your house for exchanging gifts, he finds a stray kitten, and the bought present is not the only thing you get. Of course, if you don’t want to or if you can’t, he doesn’t force you to keep it, but if you are willing to, he’s more than happy to teach you all that he knows about cats, and help you with raising your new child.

❄ I assign matching ugly Christmas sweaters for Kazutora. I don’t take criticism. Just. Look at this boy and tell me he wouldn’t pop out in front of you in a hideous sweater with a giant plush reindeer head sewn on the front, and it also has tons of little bells sticking everywhere, and,,, have i just seen Christmas lights shining on it with every color known to humankind??? And when you think it can’t be worse, he gives you a messily taped package that also rings with every movement, and has fur sticking out on the sides. And you know you will be fucxed this Christmas, ‘cause he won’t leave you alone if you decide not to wear it. I don’t need to elaborate more. I’m closing the case.

❄ He just buys something. Smiley, unlike some of his friends, doesn’t think a lot about what he should buy you. The first thought that comes to his mind is what you get. And, based on the crazy mind this boy surely has, it may be literally anything. The funniest part is that Nahoya buys you this thing the day before Christmas (or a few hours before your meeting, depending on his mood), so there’s no withdrawal. You get ˢᵒᵐᵉᵗʰⁱⁿᵍ or 𝕤𝕠𝕞𝕖𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘, or 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰 or maybe s̸͚̳̆̽o̶͕͋̈́̈́ͅm̶̗̞͑͆́e̸̢̥̮̓͋t̵̯͘̕̚ȟ̴̯i̷̢̬͛ǹ̸̡̰̫͑̈́g̴͉̞̓̔̐. You’ll never know until you open the Pandora’s box. Literally.

❄ I think that he’s still a bit of a child at heart. Angry will buy you a big plushie! But I think that he’ll also bake you your favorite cookies (if you don’t like sweets then he can make you your fav dinner!), and go a step further, doing something for you that reminds him of his childhood. I have a headcanon that when the twins were younger they kept doing lots of jewelry out of the colorful beads. Souya makes you one in your favorite colors! Maybe it looks a bit messy without any kind of consistency in choosing types of beads, but it’s pretty! (bonus point: if your pronouns are different from the ones assigned at birth, he’ll make you the second bracelet with your proper ones on it! no misgendering with this boy on horizon)

❄ Not a single soul can be surprised when I tell you that Kokonoi buys you something expensive. He has the money and he wants to spoil his baby, there’s nothing wrong with this! But because you mean so much to him, it’s not everything he prepares for you. Sure, he may buy you a piece of jewelry with real diamonds in it, or clothes from a worldwide known designer, but he also makes something by himself. It can be decoupaging a wooden box for upper mentioned jewelry, baking you your favorite pastries or just making a simple card. Koko wants to show you how much you mean to him by giving you more than his money.

❄ It may not be the usual type of present, but it is for sure the one that’ll have a lasting impact on your life. Inupi gives you a motorcycle engine in a box neatly wrapped in a ribbon. Scraping his neck, he then tells you that for the past months he’s been collecting parts and they’re all hidden in his n Draken’s shop’s magazine so that you two can build a perfect bike for you there. He wants to share his passion with you, but also it’s his sneaky try to spend more time with you.

❄ I don’t want to say that Ran forgets about buying you a present but let’s be honest. He does so. But it’s not because he doesn’t care, he was probably just too busy with the gang stuff, and before he had a chance to think about what he wanted to buy you, you popped up in front of him with a gift, saying “Merry Christmas”. His first reaction is just looking bewildered at you, without saying a single word – but after a second he blinks one, two, three times, and hugs you tightly, thanking you for the present. He then proceeds to slyly take out his phone out of his pocket to text his younger brother and prettily ask him to threaten the owner of the most bourgeois restaurant in Tokyo so that you can come and eat there without a few months in advance reservation.

❄ Rindou, unlike his older brother, doesn’t forget about preparing a gift for you. Lots of people would expect him to buy you just an expensive thing, but in my opinion it doesn’t suit him. I rather see Rinrin as a person who buys (or even makes!) something really meaningful, a gift that for everything around may be considered as not exactly fitting the description of a great gift, but you will automatically get what he has thought when he chose it. Deep down inside I think he may have a soul of a romantic that no one knows about.

❄ This boy’s precious with his s/o, I’m sure of it. Sanzu wants his loved ones to feel special, to be with them and for them. I really see Haru as a person who wants to show how good of a boyfriend he is. So he takes you on an arcade date. As soon as you are willing to, he’s gonna win every prize you desire. A teddy bear? You’ve got this. Fifteen of them? Not a problem. You want to play on more interesting machines, these where the prizes are electronic devices or other not typical items? He’s more than happy to win them for you. After this you come back home with your car stuffed to the brim with tons of plushies and other rewards. Haru makes sure you post a picture of the gifts he’s given you on social media so everyone knows how lucky you are to have him, and he also orders your favorite takeout for a grand finale of your date.

❄ Hanma gives you a box of cigarettes for Christmas. But only as a joke to annoy you when he opens it before you have a chance to take it, and he lights one cigarette up, blowing smoke in your face. He then grins and mumbles a stupid “kidding”, dodging your kick right before your foot meets his body. He’s annoying and he loves pissing you off. But Shuji loves even more seeing your happy face, so he makes sure you'll know how much you mean to him on a night full of entertainment he’s prepared for you. What adventures await you? You’ll never know if you won’t come with him.

❄ Izana seems to be an awkward person when it comes to giving and receiving gifts. At first, when you come up with the idea of exchanging Christmas gifts, he’s unsure if he feels comfortable with doing so. Deep deep inside, Izana feels uneasy with the thought of disappointing you. That’s why he proposes a compromise which is exchanging lists of potential gifts that you can prepare for yourselves. You are happy, ‘cause you have the opportunity to exchange gifts with him, and he’s happy, ‘cause there’s no way of letting you down.

❄ I spot a soul of a romantic which he is not embarrassed to show in Kakucho. He takes you to the bourgie restaurant on Christmas day. But taking you to expensive places like this is a bare minimum he could do, ‘cause you often go out without an occasion. Kaku goes a step further, borrowing Bonten’s limo and using all the privileges he has as the number three of the most dangerous organization in Tokyo – he takes you to the places no one is able to go, and shows you the other side of the town at night. You’re super safe, because you’re with him. I just like to imagine that he’s a bit extra when it comes to his loved ones.

❄ Shinichiro looks like a person that likes to spoil their loved ones – he just loves to see those closest to him happy. But he does it to an extent where it’s not healthy. Hypothetically, you’ve agreed on small gifts only – he gets you a bracelet or necklace with a small charm… with a diamond. Or you’ve both decided that telling each other what you’ve wanted for Christmas is the best idea – so he gets you exactly what you want… and a bag of other gifts too! You need to teach him that he doesn’t need to overdo in order to make you stay, ‘cause you feel stupid with your gifts being ten times cheaper than his, and his wallet feels bad, because it’s always empty.

❄ Wakasa doesn’t really care about Christmas, but he cares about you and your feelings, so he reflects your approach to the whole gift-exchanging-thing. If you are really hyped and think about his presents months before, he starts to save money, to buy you something really meaningful. But if you don’t care much, he orders your favorite takeout food or takes you on a cinema date. Waka just gives the same amount of effort as you, and I personally think it’s pretty cute and adorable of him.

❄ Hot take! Benkei is like a huge teddy bear when in a relationship. Meaning, he constantly gives you tons of big bearhugs, where your face is squished into his chest, his arms wrapped around you, and sometimes he even lifts you up just to do a few spins! That is why, as an addon to a present he’s known you really wanted, he makes a stack of coupons for these amazing hugs (and each type of hug is on a different color of paper!). For sum ppl it may be out of character for him, but ya know what? I’m starting a big teddy bear Benkei brainrot, and no one can stop me.

❄ Emma invites you over for a spa day with her. She buys all kinds of cute masks with animal patterns, moisturizing creams, hair masks, literally everything you could have imagined. If you are willing to, she proposes to give you a manicure and pedicure, it may be just only a cuticle removal if you don’t want to put color and/or do the extensions. When the time comes for the both of you to relax and chill on her bed with face masks on, Emma even cuts cucumber for your eyes to make this experience as if you are in a movie.

❄ I love her so much. Senju is a literal sunshine, but the one that can kick your ass. And she wants her significant other to also be a badass that can kick asses of the people that annoy them. And that is why she’s bought you your favorite snacks and drinks for your gift and thrown them into a paper bag. When she gives you your present she also says that from now on, she’ll help you to learn some basics of self defense and promises that will also teach you every cool kick or punch you’ll want to know! Senju pledges to take you after every lesson for popsicles that she’s paying for!

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