#It's been so fucking long since I watched the Three Doctors thought it was time for a revisit

[gayness-and-mayhem]

"You've stolen the whole of UNIT HQ!"

[whateveriwant]

I know it's a little late but this Father's Day, I'm thinking about childhood best friend Simon who's secretly in love with you.

You've known Simon since forever – long before the emergence of “Ghost”, his enlistment in the military, or, hell, even before his voice dropped three octaves. To you, Simon Riley was your best friend, the one person in life you could always count on to be there for you. And to Simon, the feeling was mutual, but his feelings towards you also extended well beyond that sentiment, far surpassing what you ever realized.

From an early age, Simon knew you were the love of his life, but he could never bring himself to admit that to you. He was always too shy, too self-conscious, too scared to fuck up everything you two had if he told you the truth. So instead, he kept his love for you a secret, and just focused on being the best friend any girl could ask for.

For a while, it was nice simply being your friend, and Simon played the part with ease. But once you entered the dating scene, everything seemed to change. Now, not only did Simon have to hide his feelings for you, he was forced to sit back and watch as you gave your love to another. Though it tore him up inside to witness, Simon still chose to stick by you anyway. He was your friend first and foremost, and so your friend he'd continue to be.

Through every new relationship, every whirlwind romance, and every eventual heartbreak you endured, Simon was always right there beside you, lending himself over in whatever manner you needed. Even as one came along that you swore was different from the others, Simon was skeptical, but he supported you regardless. And now, nearly five years into your marriage, he supposes you were right after all.

So color Simon surprised when you wind up beside him on his couch one night, crying your eyes out, trying to drown your sorrows in the bottom of a bottle. You explain how, for almost a year, you and your husband have been trying for a baby, to no success. You've done everything; ovulation tracking, fertility tests, a revolving door of doctors to try finding out what the issue is. By all accounts, there doesn't appear to be any physical concerns preventing you from conceiving. As for your husband, well, he hasn't been as diligent in determining his role in this.

You're now at a point in your life where you feel like time is working against you. You want nothing more than to have a baby of your own, and if you and your husband aren't capable of doing that, you're not sure what there is that's left for you.

As you sob into the crook of Simon's neck, he finds his neurons begin firing at an alarming rate. Quicker than he'd like, an idea takes root in his mind, and though it's bad – fucking heinous is what it is – it burrows itself into his grey matter until it's all he can focus on. While he hates himself for thinking of it (hates himself more for the way his stomach flips at the thought), there's nothing that hurts him more right now than having you in his arms so utterly distraught.

So before he can convince himself of another idea, Simon raises your head from his shoulder and tenderly cups your face between his palms. When he leans in to kiss you, a moment he's dreamed about for years, he's not surprised as you startle against him. But he holds steady, melding his lips to yours, until he feels you gradually melt into it. As he hushes the voices in his head, he plucks up his last bit of courage, and finds no resistance as he slowly guides you onto your back.

It's alright, sweetheart. He's here for you. He's going to help you out.

He'll give you the baby you so desperately desire, because that's what best friends are for, right?

[dandelionprints]

Don't Be Late

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Y/N (lil bit of fluff, angst, tormented Tommy and comfort)

Summary: When Tommy makes a promise to his wife he could never imagine that breaking it could potentially cost Y/N her life.

Warnings: bad language, a couple of slur words as used in the show *not words that I myself deem acceptable!*, a lot of violence, mentions of injuries, blood and death. Reader discretion is advised, do not read if you feel uncomfortable with this kind of content

Word Count: This is a long one coming in at 6,800k

A/N: It's been a while since I've written a full blown fic but I was on a roll so I just went with it! I hope you enjoy, please do like, reblog and/or comment your thoughts on it, I really appreciate the feedback x

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"It's been three days, Pol. Why won't she wake up?"

He leant forwards in his chair, a hand gently grasping  Y/N's as she lay motionless on her hospital bed. Her body was battered with violent purple bruises and cuts covering what seemed to be every inch of her body.

The last three days had been hell, with a mixture of so many emotions running through him  that he didn't know where to put and the not knowing. Worry, anger, sadness. Guilt. So much guilt, it consumed him. 

Tommy wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to forgive himself for not being there to protect her. It could be said that it was a case of "wrong person, wrong time", but that did nothing to subside the sense of dread that filled his stomach whenever he thought about the brutality his wife had been through, all because of him. How scared she must have been on her own waiting for him to come and save her, but he came too late.

"Give her time, Tom. She's been through a lot, her body’s trying to heal, we can't rush these things. Besides, the doctor said this morning that the swelling and bleeding has started to go down so she is getting better. Slowly. We just have to be patient", Aunt Polly delicately placed her hand on his shoulder, softly stroking her thumb back and forth over the newly clean shirt. 

Polly had brought a clean set of clothes to the hospital after seeing that Tommy was too terrifed to leave Y/N at the hospital alone for even a second, leaving him wearing blood soaked clothes for the first day. Y/N's blood.

"I should've been there Pol. None of this would've happened if I hadn't gotten too cocky and dragged John and Arthur down to London to Sabini's club. All this for a fucking business expansion"

He lowered his head and brought his free hand to his forehead, pinching at the sides as if to relieve some of the stress growing with tension there.

"Fuck!", he shouted before quickly covering his face with his hand.

Tommy could feel tears springing to his eyes as he glared down between the gaps in his fingers at the speckled hospital floor. He was so tired of crying in the presence of anyone that wasn't Y/N since the night this whole shit show happened, it made him feel weak knowing other people could see that in fact, yes, Tommy Shelby does have emotions. Y/N  was the only one he'd been able to willingly show any kind of vulnerable emotion to since he'd returned from the war.

The sound of a lighter flicking open followed by the quick sizzle of a cigarette being lit came from behind him as Polly took a drag, before holding it within Tommy's line of vision. 

"Here, take this".

He hesitated for a moment, making sure that no tears would fall, then slowly lifted his head and reached for the now softly glowing cigarette bringing it to his lips and taking a long pull, exhaling the smoke as if it were the stress partially releasing from his body.

Aunt Pol watched him carefully, almost as if she were waiting to see if he was going to explode like a ticking time bomb or finally let his shoulders relax and sink into the chair. She was thankful when he chose the latter, slowly leaning back against the wooden frame, still holding onto Y/N's hand.

"You should go back to the house, Tom. Get some rest. I'll stay with her until you come back", she spoke softly, her own eyes tired from the constant secret worrying she'd been doing as well as sitting with Tommy next to Y/N's bed the last three days.

"No. I won't leave her, Pol. I can't leave her, it's my fault she ended up like this, I can't risk them coming back or the risk of her...", he stopped his words in their tracks as a lump formed in his throat. The tears that had only just subsided now came back, threatening to spill over, "Of her dying. Alone. Without me here letting her know she's safe, that I'm sorry. So fucking sorry"

Polly's face grew empathetic as she saw the pain etched all over Tommy's, the vacant glassiness of his eyes that had only grown darker over the past few days.

"She's not going to die..."

"She might, Pol!", his anger exploded then, the ticking time bomb she'd been waiting for had finally gone off.

The chair scraped on the floor as he stood, letting go of Y/N's hand, before turning to face his aunt who remained seated, not taking her eyes off him.

"How can you be so sure that she's gonna live, eh? How can you be so sure that she's ever going to open her eyes again?"

There was less accusation in his words than it seemed, more like a plead for some kind of reassurance or promise that the love of his life would be okay, that she'd return to the real world again.

Polly stood, then, calm and collected. 

"Because I know Y/N Shelby, and so do you. She's a tough girl, it'll take more than Sabini and the fuckers who did this to take her down. Now, go home and get some sleep. I'll stay here with her, give her a wash and read some of your poetry outloud. The nurses say she can still hear what's going on around her, that she may even end up dreaming of things that are being said so we'll be having no more talk of death. John said he'll take the next shift of watching the door so tell him when you get back to come here. You know he won't let those bastards go anywhere near her if they so much as step foot near the hospital"

Polly’s eyes remained on him like a mother scolding her child until they did what they were told. She knew that he was still reluctatant to leave Y/N's bedside but felt relief when he subtly nodded to her, stubbing out his cigarette and picking up his coat before leaning over Y/N to place a kiss on her head, being careful to avoid the purpling bruise that was forming there.

"I'll be back in two hours, Pol, then you can go home and get some sleep", he said simply, making his way over to the door.

"Not two, six. You need a proper sleep"

He narrowed his eyes at her without saying anything, his lips twitching as if ready to disagree with what his aunt had said.

"I'd say eight but I know you won't be able to stay away for that long. What good are you to her if your eyes can't even focus on what the gun is aiming at? Go. Get some sleep"

Three days earlier

They'd agreed that they would meet at 8pm later that evening, after Tommy finished up with business for the day, where the family car was stored in the garage near the Shelby family home.

"Don't keep me waiting too long", she giggled, stroking his face with the palm of her hand.

"Who says you'll be waiting?", he smiled, taking the hand that was on his cheek and bringing it to his mouth, placing a soft kiss to it.

The Garrison hadn't opened for the day yet but the Peaky Boys were starting to gather at the bar, getting in a pint before the days business was about to begin. John and Arthur were already trying to place a bet with Isaiah about who could down the most pints before blacking out with Arthur claiming it to be him.

"Eh, lads! No more drinking until business is finished for the day, and Arthur, I could place twenty pound on it being anyone but you who could drink the most", Tommy interrupted, leading to a cackle of ladish jeers. 

Y/N laughed before getting Tommy's attention once again, this time placing a finger beneath his chin and gently pulling his face towards hers.

"I know you, Tommy Shelby. You like to be on time when it's for business but business is also what makes you late to see me"

He felt a pang of guilt hit his stomach at her words, he knew she was right. He'd lost count of how many times he'd come home to find her curled up in front of the fire in his office fast asleep. How many times he'd either carried her up to bed or simply placed a blanket over her while he continued working into the early hours of the morning. 

"I promise, love. I'll be at the garage at 8pm sharp"

This time he leant forward and touched his lips to hers, taking in the sweet flavour of her lips that he loved so much.

"Go on, Pol will be waiting for you"

She paused, "Is it bad to say that I don't believe you?"

"I promise, Y/N"

She wanted to believe the sincerity in his eyes but a tiny part of her knew that she'd more than likely be kept waiting out in the cold while he finished up business for the day. 

"Okay", she half smiled, "I love you, Mr. Shelby"

Tommy kissed her then, brushing a strand of hair that had fallen across her face behind her ear.

"I love you too, Mrs. Shelby"

---

It was already dark by the time she'd made her way to their meeting point with only the glow from a firepit in the workshop opposite as the main source of light, rain flooding down onto the pavement outside in typical autumnal British fashion creating the sound of pattering on the old tin roof of the garage.

Y/N sighed as she leant against the black Ford Model T, taking a look at her watch. 8:03pm. 

'Well, it's only three minutes late, let's see if he's here before four minutes late', she thought to herself. 

There wasn't much to see in the garage other than old petrol can's and some oiled rags that had been dropped lazily on the floor, not that she could see much anyway with only the fire for her source. In fact, it only stretched as far as half the length of the garage, where unbenownsed to her there were men that were lurking in the shadows, ready to pounce on the unsuspecting victim. 

"Get 'em!"

The sound of a thick London Italian accent echoed through the cold rickety room and all Y/N could think to do was to cower against the car, waiting to be manhandled in some kind of way, the panic instantly settling into her chest.

It was obvious that the men who now had their fists blowing punches to her face didn't have a clue it was in fact a woman they were beating and not a man, probably due to the fact the fire was doing little to show that she'd wrapped her scarf over her head to stop the rain from ruining her curls. They didn't realise until she mustered enough strength through the continuous punches to let out the loudest scream she could.

It was only then that the men took a step back as the same voice from before bellowed out, "Stop!"

She held her hands up to her face and felt a slick warm liquid quickly covering them, the skin beneath it sore to the touch. Her left eye was blurry from the mixture of what she could only assume to be blood and swelling, but she could just about make out the silhoutte of a slim man with a hat standing near the wall.

The adrenaline was already kicking in helping to keep some of the pain from showing it's full potential, but her fight or flight hadn't seemed to of made an appearance yet. All she could do was stand there, frozen to the spot, her hands still holding her bloodied face.

"You must be Tommy Shelby's missus", spoke the man with the hat, taking a step forward confirming in the dim light that it was who she'd feared it would be. Sabini.

"What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?", he smirked, leering towards her only inches from her face, "Apologies for the misunderstanding, we thought you were Mr. Shelby"

Her heart dropped into her stomach at the thought that this beating was meant for Tommy, that she knew they intended to do more than land a few punches to his face. She spat at the ground infront of Sabini's feet.

"You're lucky it was me and not Tommy, he'd have your eyes the minute you laid your hands on him", she was surprised by how even she managed to keep her voice despite the sheer panic coursing through her. 

Y/N knew it was a lie, that Tommy would be far too outnumbered to take on five of Sabini's men on his own especially without being able to see much.

Sabini laughed, throwing his head back slightly before stopping abruptly and grabbing onto each of her arms.

"You listen here you little princess, I don't think you quite understand the extent of how pissed off I am at your fella. You see, him and his brothers came to my club in London two nights ago. The Eden Club. A well run establishment, I'm sure you've heard of it. Anyway, they caused such a fucking scene that I've had to take matters into my own hands. I was planning on getting to Tommy, show him how scared he should really be about barging into one of my clubs, but it seems I may now have an even better way of sending that message".

Even with the light uneven across his features she could see a sly snarl creep onto Sabini's face, his breath fanning against her skin as he spoke. It was enough to make her want to wretch.

"Right boys, forget about Tommy. I want you to do what you were going to do to Tommy to her"

Her heart flew straight into her throat, threatening to jump out of her mouth at any moment. She wanted to throw up but the best thing she could do now would be to gain as much attention to passers by as she could. She screamed again only to have her mouth covered by Sabini as two men took over the hold on her arms.

"Listen here you little bitch, whether you like it or not, you're getting a beating. If Tommy's not man enough to face me himself and resorts to showing up to one of my clubs instead then this is what happens, someones pretty little face gets smashed in"

"You're a fucking creep! Tommy will be here any minute and I'm sure his brothers will be with him too, you won't know what fucking hit you!", she spat, the venom spewing from her mouth.

Sabini wasted no time in landing a hard slap against her already throbbing cheek making her splutter out whatever saliva she had left. He didn't leave it there though as his gripped both hands around her throat, squeezing as tight as he could.

"We'll be glad to see Tommy and his brothers, we can have a nice little catch up. Those boys couldn't organise a piss up in a brewery no matter how hard they tried so I'm not too worried. Carry on boys"

He let go of her throat leading her to gasp for air, her lungs felt like they were on fire with every harsh breath.

She didn't even have time to brace herself from the punch that was swiftly administered to her stomach, knocking out every bit of air she had managed to gain back, bringing her to the ground with a hard thump. Her head bounced off the ground sending a shockwave of pain running over her skull and down her neck. 

The punches were now followed by the kicks of steel toe capped boots, each kick more painful than the last until she almost felt numb. Where the fuck is Tommy?

She wanted nothing more than to scream out for him, to hear him running towards the men with bullets flying, ready to put an end to this nightmare, but all she could do was sob as the pain coursed through her.

"Boys, hold her up", Sabini's voice cut through the sound of the thumps and thuds, his voice menacing laced with a sneer.

Two men gripped Y/N's arms and yanked her back onto her feet, knees buckling beneath her with one of her ankles too weak to bare any weight. She was pretty sure she had some broken ribs and that her ankle was much the same way but she knew there was nothing she could do about it now. The only thing she could do was let her head loll forwards with sheer exhaustion. 

It was hard to keep her eyes open as her head was pulled up by a harsh grab of her hair, weakness taking over her entire body.

"Look at me. I said look at me!"

Another firm yank of the hair had her gaze just about managing to focus on Sabini, his eyes showing a glint of evil.

"I want you to tell your dirty gypsy husband that I'm coming for him next, if he wants to take over my race tracks then he's gonna have to fight for it"

"You're a fucking pig Sabini", her voice was hoarse as she spoke, her head longing to fall fowards again and let her eyes shut.

"Take my fucking name out of your mouth! 'Ere, Franco, take my name out of this scum's mouth"

She wasn't prepared for what came next as a blade was forced inside her mouth, her cheeks slowly being cut as well as a part of her lip. The taste of the metallic blood filled every tastebud, the only noise she was able to make were muffled groans as the cold metal sliced roughly through her skin.

Her body suddenly dropped to the floor once more, the sound of the mens foot steps starting to fade as they made their way towards the back of the garage and through a hole in the wooden panelling. 

"Don't forget to give your husband my message, if you survive that is", Sabini's spoke, a chuckle following him as he finally left her and made his way out the same way as the other men. 

She had no energy to even cry any more, a numbness enveloping her body and the blood still slowly seeping out of every cut she'd sustained.

She couldn't focus on anything now, the need for sleep becoming too great to keep her eyes open. She didn't even hear Tommy's footsteps quickly approaching the garage a minute later where she lay in a pool of her own blood. All she could do was let her eyelids drop as she slipped into darkness.

—

"Y/N! Oh fuck, Y/N!"

His cries bellowed through the bleak surroundings, the only movement to be seen was the flicker of the flames from the fire in his peripheral. 

“John! Arthur! Where the fuck are you?”, he screamed into the night before turning his attention back to Y/N.

"C'mon Y/N you need to wake up now, c'mon sweetheart", his desperate pleas did nothing as he cradled her head, her blood soaking into his trousers. He could see her chest rising and falling but knew that it was getting slower and slower with every moment that passed by.

It'd only been a minute or so since he'd gotten there but he could've sworn it'd been more like an hour, his heart thumping so hard that he thought it would surely pop out of his chest. 

"John! Arthur!"

Tears were streaming down his face, dripping onto Y/N's blood soaked cheeks, leaving streaks running through the red liquid.

He knew his brothers were meant to be on their way with the promise of a bed at Arrow House for the night. He just hoped that they would be sober enough to help deal with the chaos that was going on.

There was so much blood that he didn't know what to do. Sure, he could leave Y/N and go get help himself, but he didn't want to leave her alone for even a second. He'd already let her down once this evening and he'd be damned if he was going to let her die here alone on the cold stone floor, or have the people who did this to her come back and finish off the job.

John and Arthur came stumbling through the open door of the garage, an arm wrapped over each others shoulders as they laughed about how many women they'd managed to pull that night. As soon as they saw the scene in front of them though, the laughing soon stopped and they both straightened up, their eyes almost not wanting to look at the state before them.

"Who the fuck did this, Tommy? Where the fuck are they? I'll fuckin’ get 'em Tom I fuckin’ promise you, those bastards won't get away with this!" John's hands had grown into fists with his knuckles turning white, the anger twisting his face into pure hatred.

"It doesn't matter right now, John. Just go and get help, call a fucking ambulance!", Tommy looked to Arthur whose expression had turned more into terror than anything else, "Arthur, I need you to get Pol, tell her Y/N's hurt, badly. Tell her I need her here, I need... just get her Arthur, now"

It took a second longer than Tommy would've liked but both brothers soon turned and ran out towards the Shelby family home, their legs wobbling beneath them as they went.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I'm so fucking sorry", Tommy sobbed as he gently stroked her face, pulling her in closer to him. His mind was racing with all the questions he was dying to know the answer to.

He knew he should be worrying about who it was that had done this to her but he was pretty sure he knew the answer to that already, and he wasn't about to waste what time he might have left with his wife thinking about that. No. All that mattered right now was that Y/N was going to live, that her eyes would open and she'd look up at him with that brilliant smile he loved so much to tell him that she was okay, that she was going to survive this.

Flashing lights appeared outside whilst Tommy had his head rested on Y/N's, whispering over and over again how sorry he was and how much he loved her. The pain he felt was all consuming and he knew he'd give anything to be in her position right now, just like it should have been.

Even when the medics came to retrive Y/N he couldn't bare to let her go, he insisted on carrying her into the back of the ambulance and holding her all the way to the hospital. They knew better than to argue with the Shelby man but managed to convince him to allow for her vitals to be monitored on the journey there, her pulse rate rapidly declining.

Polly hadn't arrived at the garage quick enough so Arthur had driven both Polly and John to the hospital at speed, swerving all over the road as they went, the tires slipping on the slick ground beneath them.

When they finally got there they saw Tommy disappearing through the double doors with Y/N still in his arms, a trail of blood on the floor behind him. This was going to be a long night.

—

The doctors had managed to get her heart rate back up to a reasonable pace by the time she was settled into a private hospital room. Fluids were being administered consistently alongside different medicines flowing through the tubes, her wounds now dressed with bandages and a thin blanket covering her black and blue body.

"Mr. Shelby, your wife has been through a terrible ordeal, it's a miracle she's still alive", a tall man with slicked blonde hair and glasses spoke, a clipboard and pen in his hands.

"When will she wake up?", Tommy tried to shake off his annoyance at the doctors statement of the obvious, of course this was a fucking terrible ordeal! Anyone with eyes could see that. He just wanted the facts that mattered most.

"Mr. Shelby, as I said, your wife has been through a terrible ordeal..."

Tommy grimaced, "I fucking know she has, don't you think I can see what's right in front of me? That and the fact I found my wife lying in a pool of her own blood half dead? Just tell me, when will she wake up?"

He was growing tired of not having answers to the main question he had and knew he wouldn't be able to relax until he had a definitive answer.

"The honest answer Mr. Shelby is that we don't know. To be blunt we're not sure if she's going to"

Tommy's heart dropped into his stomach.

"As you know, she's been through...", the doctor paused, not wanting to use the term 'terrible ordeal' again, "A lot. We've taken some images of her brain and we can see that she has some bleeding and swelling. We're not sure that she can recover from something like that, we can only hope that she will. Her injuries are severe, Mr. Shelby. As well as the damage to the brain she also has some internal bleeding, broken ribs, a collapsed lung, brusing to the esophagus, cuts to the inside of her mouth and a broken ankle. We're doing everything we can to ensure that she'll recover from this but it will take time. I'm sorry"

A ringing sounded in Tommy's ears, a noise so defeaning that he couldn't focus on anything right now other than the fact Y/N might not make it through this. His chest tightened and he found himself struggling to breathe, the sheer weight of the words he'd just heard sitting heavy on his chest.

"Are you okay, Mr. Shelby?"

"Leave. Now, please. Leave!"

The doctor wasted no time in carrying out Tommy's order as he scurried out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Tommy fell to the floor, his knee's weak and unable to hold him upright. He clutched his chest as he gasped for the air that seemed to have become so thin in the room. Tears that had gathered in his eyes began to fall and there was nothing more he could do than kneel there on the cold floor as his world came crashing down around him. 

If he'd of been there at the time they'd agreed then this wouldn't have happened, not to Y/N anyway. It would be him laying in the hospital bed in front of him instead of her, or he'd be laying in a ditch somewhere ready for some poor passerby to find when dawn came. 

He knew for a fact that the guilt that was growing in strength would never leave him even if she did make it out of this, that he'd always blame himself for not being on time. 

A small knock on the door brought him shakily back up onto his feet again as he gripped onto the frame of the bed. Tommy managed to wipe away his tears just in time for Polly, John and Arthur to walk into the room. 

He couldn't look at them, only at Y/N laying in the bed. Her lifeless body was slightly sinking into the mattress beneath her, a mess of hair covered in congealed blood surrounded her head.

"Is she going to be okay, Tom?", John's voice quietly cut through the silence like a knife. 

Tommy took a moment before letting out a sigh, the lump in his throat wanting to escape and cause tears to come flooding out. 

"I don't know. The doctor said that she's got bleeding and swelling on the brain amongst other things. They don't know if she's going to wake up".

The room stayed silent with no one wanting to say a word, both for fear of upsetting Tommy further and also because what else was there to say? There was nothing any of them could do to make the situation better or to make light of any of this.

Tommy took a seat next to Y/N's bed side and held her fragile hand, longing for her to wrap her fingers around his, but of course she didn't. Even that alone was enough to make his heart break.

"John. I need you to arrange for the blinders to be on a rotation of a look out. I don't want anybody coming in or out this hospital without us knowing about it. Arthur, take Isaiah and a couple of the blinders with you to London, I need you to find Sabini", Tommy spoke plainly, not taking his eyes off of Y/N.

"Yes, Tom", Arthur nodded, motioning for John to follow his lead out of the room.

"Oh, and Arthur? When you find him", Tommy turned to look at him now, his eyes cold but somehow a fire lit in them, "Bring him to me. Alive"

—

Three days later

As expected, Tommy arrived back at the hospital within four hours instead of the six Aunt Polly had ordered. 

He couldn't sleep. Every time he'd managed to drift off he was soon awoken by nightmares of Y/N's screams as she was repeatedly kicked and punched, the sound each one of the blows made making his stomach churn. He could see her body laying there in a pool of blood with sobs wracking her chest... her calling out his name and him not being able to reach her even though he could see everything that was happening. 

Tommy woke up in a cold sweat, his clothes soaked right through and his hair wet. He decided he was better off admitting defeat than to try going back to sleep, the thought of having to see those images of Y/N whenever he closed his eyes was enough to make his blood run cold. 

His childhood home was quiet when he made his way downstairs. Ada had taken Finn to Arrow House under her watchful eye with Karl, it was better to be in a house that was stocked with firearms than back in London with nothing but a single pistol and where Sabini could be lurking in the shadows. 

John had gone to the hospital to take the next watch and Arthur was somewhere in London seeking out Sabini and his lackeys, waiting to hand him a blow that would make the Italian man wish he'd never come to Birmingham.

Tommy decided on having a bath before putting on clean clothes, taking a look in the mirror before he left. His complexion had almost drained of colour over the past three days with the exception of the dark circles that appeared under his eyes, much darker than usual. 

"God I hope she wakes up soon", he muttered to himself, adorning his peaky cap and reaching for the door handle before stepping out onto the bustling streets of Birmingham, lighting a smoke as he made his way to the hospital.

When he walked through the doors of Y/N's room he noticed something different. Aunt Polly was no longer sitting there with sadness in her eyes, instead she was stood next to the bed holding Y/N's hand, a small smile upon her face.

His eyebrows furrowed with confusion and his pace slowed as he approached her.

"What's happened?" he asked, nervous energy rushing through him.

"She moved, Tom. All on her own, she moved!"

Polly was beaming now, fresh tears sprang to her eyes and she had to resist the urge to hug him.

"What do you mean she moved?"

"I mean, I was reading her one of your poems and holding her hand. Her fingers started to move as if she was trying to tell me she could hear me. She's still in there Tommy"

His heart swelled in his chest although he didn't want to get his hopes up too much, there was nothing worse that breaking your own heart with false hope.

"It might've just been the nerves jumping, Pol. She probably doesnt have control of her body right now", he knew he sounded like dismissive bastard but he couldn't bring himself to believe that Y/N could do that but not open her eyes.

"Stop being so bloody negative Thomas. I'm telling you exactly what I saw with my own two eyes. Read to her yourself, you'll see", Polly scolded him, picking up the pages she'd left on her seat and going to hand them to him.

Tommy said nothing but shook his head towards the pages and instead took a step closer towards Y/N's bed. 

Polly placed Y/N's hand in his and softly spoke, "Y/N love, if you can hear what we're saying then squeeze Tommy's hand, let us know that you're still there".

He held his breath as he waited to see if she'd respond, his eyes watching her fingers like a hawk.

"She's not moving, Pol. You're seeing things with the lack of sleep, go home and get to bed, I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere"

"Don't tell me what you think I may be or may not be seeing and certainly don't tell me what to do. You may be a man now Thomas but I'm still able to lay you across my knee and give you a good hiding", her eyes glared daggers into the side of his head as he continued to stare at Y/N's fingers, unmoving on top of his.

"I'm sorry Pol, I just can't... I just can't stand the thought of having the hope there that she'll show me she's okay if she never actually...", he stopped dead in his tracks.

His mouth dropped open and his gaze widened in shock as Y/N's fingers started to slowly lift upwards before coming back down to rest on top of his fingers, trying to curl themselves around his.

"Y/N? It's okay, I'm here. You're safe", he placed his free hand over hers and leant over to kiss her head, the bruises still prominent, "I'm sorry Y/N, I'm so fucking sorry".

Tommy couldn't hold back the tears that were coming and let them spill out to fall down her cheeks, the overwhelming burst of relief he felt within his soul was like nothing he could explain. 

Polly stood with a hand over her mouth, a smile beneath her fingers. 

"T-T-Tommy?..."

Did she just speak?

His head shot up, eyes wide in disbelief. When he caught the first glimpse of her face he could see that her eyes were slightly open. Her eyeballs had red spots on them where blood vessels had burst, either from the pressure of being strangled or from the numerous hits to the face she'd sustained. He tried to hide the shock that hit him and gently cradled her face with both hands, careful not to press down on the discoloured blotches that lay beneath them.

"You're awake, you're... I-I can't believe it", he stuttered, scanning her face for any kind of expression.

"Y-you... w-w-were... late", she croaked.

It was almost as if he'd taken a stab to the chest as her words met his ears and the guilt came flooding back.

"I know, I'm so, so sorry Y/N, I really am. I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for this, not for as long as I live"

He stifled a sniff as his tears continued, a sob escaping his lips as his face screwed up into pure anguish.

"I-it's... okay", she murmered, taking a deep breath, "do-don't be... s-sorry... I-I'm j-just... glad i-it w-wasn't... you"

"No sweetheart, no. It's not okay, none of this is okay. Because of me, you're lying here in a hospital bed, completely black and blue with internal injuries and broken bones, all because I got too cocky and tried to challenge that fucker. I swear to you, Y/N. I'm gonna put a bullet between his eyes for this, he's not going to get away with it".

He brushed a stray strand of hair away from her face and she smiled softly, the memory of him doing to same back in The Garrison just before she'd left him that day, just before all of this happened…

"H-he said t-t-to... g-give you a... m-message..."

"No, shh shh, it's okay. You don't need to tell me anything right now, you need to rest and get better. You can hardly speak. Tell me anything you need to when you start to feel better. All I care about right now is that I have you, here, alive. No amount of money nor business could come close to how happy I am right at this very moment"

Two Days Later

She'd been awake more frequently over the next couple of days with each day being better than the last. Her bruises had now started to turn a lighter shade of blue with greens and browns dotted through them and the bleeding and swelling on her brain had improved significantly. 

The doctors were stunned at how well she was doing, they half expected her to die within the first few days she'd arrived at the hospital. 

"How are you feeling today?", Tommy asked as he stroked her hair from his position on the edge of the bed.

"A bit be-tter than yesterday", she softly smiled. She couldn't deny that she still felt like absolute shit and that every time she breathed it felt like she was trying to push air through a straw, but she was just relieved that she'd survived this whole ordeal, "Can you h-help me sit up a b-bit please?"

He instantly stood and gently swooped an arm beneath her legs and the other behind her back, carefully lifting her up before sitting her back down on the bed and repositioning her pillows behind her against the headboard. She winced with the motion but tried her best to hide it. She already knew that Tommy had so much guilt eating him up inside, it almost felt like if she showed him that she was in any kind of pain that it was a reminder of how much he'd fucked up.

"Is that okay?"

She nodded slowly, aware of her aching neck with every slight movement.

"Good, it's nice to see you looking a bit more like yourself", he smiled, his eyes studying every inch of her face.

"Sabini t-told me to tell y-you t-that he's coming for y-you next and that I-if you want to take o-over his race tracks then you're gonna h-have to fight for it... I'm s-scared, Tommy"

Tommy moved his chair closer to the bed, so close that his knees were touching the side of the frame, and took her hand in his.

"I promise you Y/N, you have nothing to be scared about. I know that I broke my promise before about being on time and it cost both of us more than I thought possible, but I swear to you, right here, right now in this moment, I won't let that fucker come near you ever again"

A response to that seemed impossible. Of course she wanted to believe her own husband but when he'd already broken one promise, one that had ultimatley almost led to her death, how could she possibly believe that he'd keep this one?

He could see her thoughts running round her mind, her eyebrows furrowing and mouth twitching like she didn't know what to say.

"Look, I know I fucked up massively. I will never be able to explain to you how sorry I am and I'd understand completely if you didn't want to be with me any more, but please believe that I will do everything in power from here on out to make sure that you're safe"

He was almost scared to hear what she was going to say. Did she want to leave him? Was he destined to lose his wife, not by death this time, but from the sheer fact she didn't think he could keep her safe?

"I-I could n-never leave you, T-Tommy Shelby", she smiled, her lips curving up into her bruised cheeks. 

Tommy stood up and brushed his lips against hers, laying a tender kiss upon them before pulling back slightly, enough to still feel her breath on his face.

"Just p-promise me one m-more thing", she spoke, looking into his eyes.

"Anything"

"Don't ever be l-late again"

He grinned, the twinkle in his eyes that she hadn't seen since waking up returning once more.

"I promise"

———

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[a-b-riddle]

A Simple (Mis) Understanding Chapter Two: Numbness & Pain

Daisy

I always used to think it was an exaggeration of how pregnancy is a constant state of exhaustion. But it was a lot of work growing a tiny human. Add in the fact that I'm still working 40 + hours a week and, of course, something is always causing some sort of discomfort or pain.

Swollen feet, back pain, nausea; I can't even find any solace in sleep. The 32 week mark felt so close, yet still so far. Another eight or so weeks of this seems like a drop in the bucket compared to how far along I am, but still. That still another two months. So far away when you want to be done, but still too short compared to everything I still have yet to do.

Another two months to set up a crib and wash her new clothes. Another two months to figure out a name and make decisions that I always envisioned making with a partner. Another two months of struggling to do things like picking up shit off the floor or staying on my feet long enough to make a decent meal.

But right now, I wasn't worried about the two months ahead of me and all the things I still have to do. Right now, I was looking forward to a three day undisturbed weekend. The pain in my feet and sciatica was becoming so bad, I had taken Friday off to see a doctor and spend the rest of the weekend doing nothing, but sitting in my modest little house and watching mind rotting television. I might even indulge in some spicy reading. Heaven knows its been too long.

Or at least, it hasn't been since them. That day in the office, but... that really didn't count. I often wrestled with myself about it. That one time erased any feelings I had for any of them. But I felt a bit pathetic how it now tainted every good memory I had with them. Kyle bringing me something to snack on when he realized I hadn't gone to the mess hall. Price always having a cup of earl grey tea cooling for me first thing in the morning. Two packs of zero calorie sweetner and a bit of honey.

Sweet like you.

I couldn't stand the smell of it now. I blamed it on the hormones. A lot of things made me queasy, but something about the smell of the bergamot, made me sick in a completely different way. A feeling not of nausea, but of... fear. Like the same way a pentagram could summon demons, earl grey could summon mine. As if John Price was somehow there any time the scent lingered in the air.

But he wasn't. None of them were. Fuck. Why did my thoughts always go back to them at some point? No. This was going to be a relaxing weekend god dammit. Fuck them.

Almost angrily, I hit the garage key fob, shutting the door and engulfing me into darkness; a thin line of light leaking through the bottom of the garage door. When I had opened my door, I could at least see a path to my mudroom. I grabbed my purse, ready to go in, when I felt it.

Hundreds of needles. Stabbing and digging into my feet. Not just the soles, but the entire fucking foot the moment I bared any weight on them. I pulled off my flats and it was then I noticed how angry they looked. Red and swollen and all but screaming at me to sit my fat ass back down. I wiggled my toes, trying to get some blood flow. Fuck. Why didn't they hurt while I was driving?

I manage to get onto my feet, using the car door as support. Steading myself until I was ready to take the first step. By the time I had managed to all but crawl inside, ten minutes had passed since my initial arrival time. I got off at 5:00, but usually didn't log off until almost 6:00. Granted, I work from home, but I had run out of a few essentials. Essentials now that were in the boot of my car.

Fuck.

10 minutes won't hurt. Not like there is any thing frozen. Speaking of which, I forgot my ice cream... dammit. I really need to start keeping a list on the fridge. It's hard to remember when pregnancy brain (or stomach) takes over and I slam a container in a single sitting.

Grabbing a pillow from the couch, I went to the kitchen. Which considering the town house, or terraced housing I suppose now, was perfect for a single and expecting Omega it was cozy. Not like the base where going from the common area to the chow hall was about a three minute stroll.

I get down and lay on my back. Carefully maneuvering so my ass rests against the cabinets before I hook the back of my heels unto the counter top so I could rest my feet a bit. Not the most sanitary, but it wasn't like I had guests. It was just me. For now.

It took a few moments to adjust. My back ached against the hardwood, but I could already feel the relief from my feet and legs. It wasn't all that shocking that I was having a hard time with them. I had gained a considerable amount of weight during my pregnancy. When I had brought it up to the OBGYN about possibly cutting back on food, her suggestion was to simply not weigh myself at home. Now when I went in for a visit they made me turn around before taking my weight.

It was hard. I've always had a problem with how I looked and now adding pregnancy then taking away the option to diet and exercise didn't exactly help.

I pulled out my phone and was preparing to open my kindle app when I saw a tiny red bar in the top right corner of my phone. Of course. I get nice and settled and my phone is on 2 fucking percent. Whatever. I tell Alexa to set an a timer for fifteen minutes and take a little nap. Maybe meditate.

A knock on the door quickly brings any possibility of relaxation to a pause. Margaret next door was dropping off Winnie off early to go to her book club. Margaret was a widow and a recent empty nester. She had spent her life as a mother and a homemaker. When I got custody of Winnie two months ago, she had quickly stepped up in helping me with everything from child rearing to managing my pregnancy.

"Hello, Maggie!" I greeted from the floor. "Hello, Winnie Darling." Winnie had the same sand colored hair as me and bright green eyes. Her face was a shade of red and I could smell her from the entryway. Someone would need a bath today. Fantastic.

"Oh, Dear!" Maggie fussed, setting Winnie down on her feet before coming over to me. "Are you alright?" Winnie didn't bother stopping to hug me like she normally would before making a beeline toward the potty. She usually was a creature of habit, but nature calls I suppose.

"Feet are a bit swollen." I waved off. "Just resting them a bit."

"I don't have to go tonight." She set her bag down. A deep green corduroy shoulder bag that always had just what you needed in it. A wet wipe, hand sanitizer, a spare tissue and even a stain pen when a spill happened at the most inconvenient time. "I'll stay and-"

"Maggie." I said, trying my best to sound at firm, but it was hard with her. No one told Maggie 'no'. "It's alright. Just a bit of water retention. Nothing to fret over." And it wasn't. I could already feel the pain from earlier subside.

"Really, it's no bother." She argued, bending over to unstrap one of her shoes. "It's a bloody stupid book anyway. I just go for the gossip really."

"Maggie." I tried again. "Really."  "It's getting close to the due date and I don't want to burn out on me just yet." It was a lie. Even with her greying hair, a deepened laugh line, Maggie didn't burn out. She was one of the few Omegas I had met in my life and she could run circles around any of them, myself included.

The sound of flushing sounded from the bathroom followed by the faucet. She huffed before slipping her shoe back on. "If you insist."

"I do." I encouraged. As much as I loved having Maggie's help, I hated feeling like a burden. She had raised her children. It was time for her to do things for herself. "Besides, we'll see you tomorrow after my appointment tomorrow." The bathroom door clicked open, revealing my little Win with the front of her smock covered in water. Fantastic.

"Hi, Mommy." Winnie finally greeted. Her freshly washed hands dripping water droplets onto the hardwood. "What are you doing?"

"My feet hurt so I'm just letting them rest." I explained, looking up at her. Winnie was rambunctious as most four-year-olds without a sense of self preservation are, but when I explained to her how careful she had to be now that I had her sister in my belly, her nature had become more gentle.

It worried me as much as it warmed my heart. 

"Why don't you sit on the couch?" She asked. Her head tilting to the side, face etched as if she were trying to figure out my reasoning.

"Because it helps when you lift your feet up high in the sky, Winnie Pooh." Maggie explained before looking back at me. "Well if you're sure-"

"I am. Go." I urged. "We'll see you tomorrow. Lunch around noon?" Spending time with Maggie didn't make me feel like such a parasite when I knew she enjoyed the company. Her children had all moved away, only one staying in the UK. She wasn't so alone, but neither was I.

"Wouldn't miss it." She gave a soft smile. The laugh lines around her face deepening. "See you tomorrow, Dearies." She said, retreating back outside. The soft sound of the door clicking behind her.

Winnie had laid down beside me. Yep. Definitely going to need a bath tonight. "How was school today?" Winnie went to a pre-school that was luckily covered under my insurance. Perks of being an Omega. I'll take it where and when I can.

She talked about going to the playground and painting. All the usual bits. Who she played with and new things she learned. Then came the question. A question she had asked before in passing. A subject I changed with ease before. 'Have you brushed your teeth? How about another episode of Bluey? Put on your trainers (because we can't just say tennis shoes anymore) and we'll go for a walk to the park. I had skirted around the question with ease. 

"Why don't you have a mate if you have a baby?" Winnie was too young to get the answers to a lot of life's difficult questions. Why did Tiffany not like us? Why didn't she get to see her daddy anymore? Why did that man look at you weird on the train, mommy?  I wish she would just stay this little. That she never needed or want to know the harsh truths about me, us.

"I..." I wracked my brain for an answer and just came up short. I couldn't think of a way to sugarcoat it. We almost had a mate. Mates. We almost had a pack that would have walked you to school on the mornings my feet were too sore or I was already running late. They would have loved you. "It... it's complicated, Darling." Is what I chose instead. The other worrisome fact is that Winnie was too young to understand the concept about mates. I had never broached the subject which only means she probably heard it from some little shithead at school. 

Wonderful.

"I'll explain it when you're older." I promise, closing my eyes and letting her snuggle into the crook of my arm. "Do you wanna rest your eyes with me?"

"Like when I'm five?" She asks putting one of her hands underneath my shirt onto my belly. It had become a thing she had started since I told her about the baby.

"Maybe six." I said, looking down at her. She gave a yawn before closing her eyes.

"I think five is better."

"Okay, Win." I said. "When you're five we'll talk about it." It was a promise I hoped she would forget. But I didn't want to negotiate with a four-year-old about something future me could deal with. I wanted just 15 minutes of this. I order Alexa to set a timer to make sure we haven't dozed too far off. Winnie still needed to shower and eat. I still needed to get the groceries out of the car. But I could spare another 15 minutes.

[likedovesinthewindd]

give or take; part ten of sore loser ⋆ masterlist

summary: patrick comes to visit | content/warning: explicit language, arguing and light angst | tags: @midwestprincesss | a/n: yes it is short again I'm sorry but also I need ideas on this damn ending yall give me ideas pls!!

Art squints his eyes, his racket rising in the air with precision before he serves. It's near perfect and and you watch attentively as him and his teammate play, your good hand absent-mindedly rubbing over the plaster of your cast.

Watching Art play was always a feast for the eyes, but recently, it had filled you with an uncertain envy. You deeply yearned to be in his position, the weeks until you were gully healed feeling like they were moving at a snailspace.

Your mind had been running wild recently; agitated because you couldn't play, frustrated because you couldn't write or do your work without help and scared at what your future from here looked like. Per your scholarship's terms, they didn't drop you completely, and your coach had promised she would wait until you were healed.

The words were supposed to put you at ease, but your doctor's voice rang in the back of your mind, her concern over how well your wrist would heal based on how bad you had broken it. Her telling you that you could suffer from possible long-term effects.

You were so deep in thought that you didn't immediately register Patrick plopping down next to, only coming to when he nudged your shoulder with his.

Your laugh was like a bell that went off in Art's head, and he looked over to find you wrapping your arms around his friend in greeting. The game was suddenly less important, and he asked his teammate for a break which he begrudgingly agreed to. He made his way over to the two of you, Patrick enveloping him in a tight hug and pulling away to slap his hands against his face playfully.

The three of you cut Art's practice short and made your way to the food court to catch up. Patrick didn't miss the way you decided to sit next to Art, the both of you sitting across from him. He didn't miss the way your thighs rubbed against Art's, his knee playfully nudging yours under the table every now and then and the shy smile he gave you every time you caught his gaze. The three of you were happily catching up before you realized you'd forgotten your gym bag, excusing yourself and leaving the two friends to their own devices.

Patrick looked over at his friend, deep in thought as he bit into his sandwich. "So," Patrick started making Art look up at him with raised eyebrows. "You two?" he asked. "What about us? Art asked through a mouthful. "C'mon," Patrick scoffed. "It's obvious things have gotten a little serious since I've been gone," he reasoned, taking a big gulp of his coke before continuing.

"Have you two been fucking?" he asked what he wanted to ask from the beginning. Art dropped his sandwich, his face scrunching into an appalled expression. "That's none of your business, man," he replied, watching Patrick's smile widen, cheeks balling at the action.

"I thought we told each other everything?" he asked, voice taking on a serious tone despite his smirk. "Why does it bother you so much?" Art asked, already passed irritated. "It doesn't," Patrick lied, "I just can't help but wonder where that leaves me."

Patrick took another bite of his sandwich, finishing it before adding, "I hope you realize this is just a game to her." Another bite at his sandwich. "A conquest. She's using you," he adds bitterly. "What could she possibly be using me for?" Art asked, angered by Patrick's claim, who in return shrugged, that stupid smirk still present on his face. "I dunno. Emotional support, pity, to somehow absorb your skills, sex? You figure it out, Art."

Art's frown deepened, ready to retort at his friend until you sat down in your spot next to him, sparing them both a smile and an out of breath apology. The topic was dropped there, the three of you continuing where you had left them.

It was, however, brought up again a few days later, this time between you and Patrick when the two of you had gone to watch one of Art's matches.

"What happened?" he asked, head nodding down to your hand laid down in your lap. "I broke it while playing," you said, fingers subconsciously flexing in the cast. "How long 'till you can play again?" You sighed, hand subconsciously rubbing over the cast as it always did when you were deep in thought. "Twelve weeks. Give or take." Patrick only hummed, taking a moment to take you in in your entirety.

You looked good – as you always did – but tired, eyes slightly puffy and laced with red, with a soft frown on your pretty face. He almost felt bad for what he was about to do.

He shuffled a little closer, making sure he was right by your ear when he asked, "Does this put your little game on hold now?"

You looked over at him, kissing your teeth when you saw the stupid smirk on his face. "Go fuck yourself," you said softly, grateful the few chairs next to you were open so that no one could hear your outburst. He laughed, hand rubbing over his cheeks and mouth. "You're always so hot and cold," he started. "I'm still not sure if you even like me."

"But you know what I do know?" he asked.

"What," you said, a command for him to continue rather than a question. "I know that you're a bitch," he started, "and that you get off on using people." You scoffed but the smile on your face betrayed you, eyebrows raising at his words. "That's not true," you said, refocusing your attention on Art, but it didn't deter Patrick. Not much could when he had his mind set on something.

"Then what are you doing?" he asked, saying your name like it was bitter in his mouth. You pursed your mouth, dead set on ignoring as you watched Art. "What are you getting out of him now?" he asked again obviously not ready to let the subject go.

"Let me ask you this, Patrick," you looked over at him again. "Are you mad that you 'lost' me or that you feel like you might lose Art?" He groaned, head tipping over the backrest of the chair as he rubbed his face in frustration, and you smiled. "I won't steal your boyfriend, Patrick," you said with a shrug, "I know you need him just as much as you think I do."

"You never answered my question from that night," he said way off topic, "you never chose." You looked at him, green-blue eyes focused on you with an angry expression, so close to you it probably looked odd to anyone watching you. You didn't answer him, turning back to the court as you folded your arms. Patrick followed suit, dropping the subject as his leg bounced in irritation.

✿ ⊹ ˚. part eleven

[hiwelcometothemonstersancturary]

And that's how you begin to heal (and stop Catnap and Mommy Long Legs from killing each other at the hospital)

You were hurt. Not just emotionally, of course, you were pretty much dead inside for more than ten years at this point, but you were physically what anyone could only describe as "devastated". Your back ached with carrying the grabpack around for the last four days or so, you had broken three bones in your right hand, your arms and legs had almost been torn off at least twice, and, of course, the nasty cut from almost getting impaled.

Frankly, it was a surprise that you didn't just collapse the moment the first ambulance arrived. But if you did, then your newfound kids would have panicked, and the Prototype would have been really, really mad if there was another conflict just when you all thought this nightmare was finally over.

You were gently cradling Poppy in your lap when you saw the ambulance lights in the horizon. You had tried to prepare yourself for this moment since the end of the confrontation with the Prototype, but your heart was still almost breaking out of your body with how fast it was beating. And yet, you kept a calm exterior. Comforted an anxious Dogday, let Bunzo also take shelter in your lap, much to Poppy's dismay, even tried to distract Mommy Long Legs with a joke or two.

The cops arrived first. You had put yourself between them and the group of toys, trembling from head to toe. You didn't exactly know what exactly they were going to do, but Catnap's sudden apparition behind you made some of them shiver.

You calmed down the big feline as you approached the authorities. "These guys were trapped inside the factory", you calmly communicated. "Playtime Co. made them as experiments. They're organic, very hurt, and starving. Please put your guns away unless you want to startle any of those kids".

The man you that approached you had his eyes glued on the group, who, in turn, was staring back. Your thoughts went racing to the idea of Mommy Long Legs deciding to attack them in order to protect you or herself, and you immediately just gave him the bag full of paperwork you had found on your journey. He stared at the first paper, then quickly looked at the others, then simply said:

"What the actual fuck did Playtime got themselves into...?"

"Maybe try to leave a bucket close to you. Some of the things they did won't be good for your stomach".

The cop ignored you. Then the ambulances arrived, and all hell broke lose as your last remains of sanity and calmness fought a war in order to not die from the idea of any of the toys you had just rescued ending up attacking a doctor. You came back to the group, gently begged them to be patient and to please trust the humans dressed up like doctors, and to please remember these ones were there to help, not hurt, and to please stick to each other.

Then a mini huggy tried to bite a nurse. You called out for the little guy, who simply shrugged and approached Kissy Missy, headbonking her and begging to be close to her as the strange humans surrounded you.

An hour and a half later and everyone was at the hospital, trembling and anxious, and you were stuck with Catnap and Mommy Long Legs.

"C'mon, big boy", you called for the feline. "You can do it. Just let the nurse help you!"

Catnap hissed, loud and angrily, at both you and the man with the lotion for burn treatment. Long Legs was sitting close by, eye twitching and a smirk on her face as she watched the two of you.

"Why not?!"

"I can survive. I felt worse", he told you, eyes never leaving the nurse. "Now leave".

"Theo, weren't you the one who told the Prototype it was time for us to live instead of just survive?"

Catnap then looked straight at you, looking very unhappy. The growled again before, finally, offering one of his paws for the nurse.

"Don't try to pull any tricks. I know all of them".

"Like playing dead?", Long Legs chuckled. "Like what you did to me?!"

"And now, look at where we are. I have merely lost part of my ear. You, on the other hand..."

You sighed as Long Legs got up from her chair, hand on her missing arm: "Are you sad because Mommy scared you? Booh, booh, Mommy is so scary, Prototype! Please, help me destroy Mommy!"

"I learned how to hunt. You learned how to throw a tantrum".

"And Mommy never had to call Daddy for help when she was hunting!"

"If you two keep on like this I'll undergo cardiac arrest"

The two toys stopped hissing at each other to instead stare at you with wide eyes. You made a "hmph" sound, pointing at your own bandaged chest in order to further prove the point.

"See? I'm all hurt in there! If you two don't let the nurses and doctors treat you, then I'll be the guy needing treatment".

"No, no, nononono!", Long Legs dramatically gestured a half "X" sign with her single arm, quickly going back to just sitting on her chair instead of being all spread out. "You'll see how much of an excellent patient Mommy is, don't worry! I'll show you a good example!"

"...", said Catnap, growling quietly to himself as the nurse was finally able to treat him. "... I remember you going into disiciplinary confinement more times than I ever did".

"W h a t ?", Long Legs asked.

Catnap stared at the window, tail anxiously twisting. You merely melted in your own chair, staring at the serum next to you as it was slowly trying to make your body feel better again. The nurse kept on with his job, and the TV kept on playing an episode of Pingu.

They even had disciplinary confinement, uh?, you thought, not impressed in the slightest, the memory of having to hold Long Legs in your arms so she would let the doctor examine her passing through your mind.

Catnap and MLL were now staring at the TV, little Pingu entertaining them. Poppy was asleep in another room with Bunzo, Kissy and Huggy, while both Miss Delight and Dogday were undergoing more serious medical procedures for their "conditions". The other toys were being examined, and, if everything went well, would soon return to you. And Prototype was doing his job back at the factory at making sure no one would find the how tos of transforming a person into a toy...

You closed your eyes, feeling true relief for the first time in your life.

Maybe, just maybe, after all of this was said and done, you could all live together as one big family. That was what Poppy suggested, at least, and the other toys seemed happy with the idea. And also maybe, also just maybe...

You could finally feel free from all this guilt

---

Oh, dear, this was harder to write than I thought, but it was a blast! I didn't proofread anything but I'm open for more requests regarding my own take on "Angel saves everyone"! And if you enjoyed this, please check out my commission info - it's all in my pinned post at ! garcavisconde! Thank you! <3

[momolady]

Somerbron Lake: A Romance (Part Three)

Female Main Character x Male Monster Dark Romance - Sense of dread - Creepy Neighbors - Sick husband

It had been so long since James and I had been able to perform the duties a man and wife are thought to do. He’s been so weak, and his doctors had advised against it, especially while he was in the hospital. I missed his touch, I missed him pressed against me. I liked how his hairy chest felt against my breasts. I liked fucking James, he was quite good at it.

We’d been nervous to go about it, but once we started it was hard to stop. Lots of pent up desires came rushing forward and toppled us like a waterfall. Beat under the torrential waves, we gave in, using our marital bed to its fullest for the first time in over a year.

We laid upon the bed, all the blankets had been tossed off and laid on the floor. Both of us were winded, out of practice and out of shape as we were. James let out a laugh, and I had to join in with a giggle. We smiled at one another, cuddling close again, wanting to be within reach once those desires built up again.

“That was amazing,” James sighed.

I ran my hands up and down his back. “It was.” I lifted my head, beaming so bright it could light up the whole time. He kissed me, sighing in relief.

“There you are,” he murmured as he stroked my hair from my sweaty brow. “This is the first time I’ve felt at home here.” He kissed the top of my head and squeezed his hand around my hip.

I furrowed my brow. “First time? I thought you liked it here.”

He was quiet, considering what he could say next. “Well, yeah, Somerbron is a nice place and all, but-” He hissed, sucking hair through his teeth. “I don’t know how to explain it, Lori. It’s like staying in a hotel. It’s nice here, it's fun to visit, but I don’t feel welcomed.”

Pulling away from him, I sat up upon my elbow so we could have this conversation eye to eye. “Everyone has been so nice.”

“Yeah well,” he propped up at well, staring straight ahead to the foot of the bed. “I just feel like everyone is…watching us.”

“I don’t understand,” I murmured.

“Anytime I go into town on my own, it’s like all the women are staring at me,” he said. “They watch me, take in my every move, like I’m going to do something. Something bad. And I feel guilty! But I’m not planning on doing anything. I’m just…I feel as if I’m being invasive.”

“But anytime I’m out they always ask about you,” I try to argue. “Maybe they’re keeping an eye on you because they know you’ve been ill.”

“I don’t want that either.” James shook his head then put his palm against his forehead. “If I could stay out by the lake all day, that would be great, I would be happy. But I can’t keep shaking this feeling that I’m being watched all the time.”

I put my hand over his. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

James exhaled with some force. “The past few years all you’ve done is worry about me. I didn’t want to add to that. You seem happy here, you’ve made friends. I’ve already taken a lot from you, I didn’t want to take this away too.” He looked me in the eye, taking my hand and holding it tight.

It was a hard sentence to hear. I hadn’t thought of it that way at all. But I did feel like being in Somerbron was something for me. I held that back out of guilt. “I don’t want you to feel that way, James. We both deserve to be happy.”

“Maybe so, but I’ve been taken care of for a long time.” He sighed heavily. “It’s your turn to have that comfort. I can get over this, I’m sure. We lived in our last place so long. And I got used to being in the hospital. Being in a whole house to ourselves, a small town, it’s new for now.”

“But you have to tell me things that bother you. Alright?”

James smiled and put his arms back around me. “Okay. I will.” He held me for a long time, both of us quiet.

“Lachlan creeps me out,” he finally muttered.

I laughed, giving him a slight push. “I thought you two were getting along!”

“I guess?” James scoffed. “But it seems like all he cares about is you. It sets off alarms for me.”

“Don’t be jealous,” I laughed.

“I’m not.” James’ voice took a serious turn. “And excuse me if this makes me sound territorial, but I don’t like him being around you. When you both were working upstairs when I had to rest, I don’t know, it made me feel weird.”

“He’s a sweet guy,” I tried to assure him.

James frowned, pursing his lips together. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. Maybe it’s just I’ve grown to mistrust men because of all the doctors.” He shook his head again. “I didn’t mean for us to have a conversation like this.”

We had been having so much fun. The sex was good, a little sloppy, but good. And I had an orgasm for the first time in ages. I didn’t want it to turn sour. I had been hoping to go again. Now it didn’t seem like this was going to shift tones again. “It’s okay. I’m glad you brought it up. I know now.”

James reached off the side of the bed and grabbed up the blanket. He laid flat upon his back and looked up at the ceiling. “Remember in college and I would sneak into your dorm? You had that black light and all those weird posters.”

I crawled under the blankets and curled up beside him. “I remember.”

“That was the first time I felt at peace with myself. I was always so restless as a kid. Being in that dorm room with you was peace on earth.”

I smiled and kissed his chest. “It was.”

“Maybe we should get a black light,” he teased.

I giggled and pressed up against him, hoping to get him aroused again. “I’m sure we could find one. Maybe my mom has my old one packed away somewhere.”

James rolled onto his side to face me. “Maybe we can move into the actual master bedroom at some point.”

“Would that help you feel better?” I asked.

He nodded. “I think I can manage the stairs. One at a time.”

I kissed him, rolling him back onto his back so I was straddling him. He reached up, taking hold of my hair and wrapping it around his fingers.

“I might be getting that all chopped off tomorrow,” I teased. “Enjoy it while you can.”

James chuckled, pulling it so I leaned down to kiss him again.

In the morning, James’ mom came to pick him up for his doctor’s appointment. They’d be out most of the day, as she also wanted to give him some things from his grandmother’s house they were cleaning out. Jane came over not long after to take me into town for my hair appointment. I had set it a couple of weeks ago, back when I still thought I had so much to do moving. But then Lachlan came and helped me with it. I was done so quickly, I was just sitting at home twiddling my thumbs most days.

I was sitting in the salon with Jane looking over catalogs. I still had no idea what I wanted for my hair.  My mind wandered between that and what James had told me the night before. I looked around at the few other women in the room. No one was paying any attention to me. Maybe James was just mistaken. After being in the hospital so long, maybe he thought all eyes were on him.

Jane huffed and set her magazine aside.“Most of these styles I just don’t get. Young women these days are so brave.”

“It’s just a haircut, it all grows back. Nothing is forever,” I murmured, eyes fixated on the glossy pages. The magazine was old and some of the styles were outdated, but I still kept looking.

“How's that husband of yours doing?” Jane asked.

“He’s doing quite well actually.” I set the magazine down and leaned back in the plastic covered chair. “The air seems to be doing wonders for him. And of course he’s down at the lake almost everyday. He’s starting to be like his old self.”

Jane smiled and nodded at me. “Good. Very good. A strong husband is what every wife needs.”

I never needed James to be strong, not in the traditional sense.

“Mrs. McLeod, we’re ready for you.” A light blonde said as she stepped out of the back. Another woman whisked past, going out the door with a glance towards me.

I followed her to the back while Jane sat up in excitement. “I’m sorry, I don’t really have an idea of what I want today.”

The blonde’s all too perfect smile beamed back at me. I was reminded that I needed to check out the dentist here. James and I hadn’t really gone since his illness had progressed.

“That’s alright, I can help you out with that. I’m Rebecca by the way.” She led me to a little room in the back done all up in green with antique pictures hanging on the walls. The whole room seemed out of time.

She sat me down upon the old chair and leaned it back, placing my head upon the lip of the sink. “You do have very thick hair,” she said over me as water began to rush down.

The water was cold, unbearably cold. It made my scalp tingle and my teeth ache. I wanted to say something, but I kept quiet. I saw that creature again, the one that pulled me into the lake. Or was it a nightmare? It seems so fuzzy and vague now. But I recall it clearly. Those eyes. Those big, wide, sad eyes.

“You know, I hear all the gossip around here.”

I opened my eyes and swallowed. The water was growing warmer. “Do you have something about me then?”

She laughed. “Oh just that Lachlan has taken a liking to you.”

My eyes went to the wall again, the faded wallpaper, the mirror that was cracking all around the edges. The pictures on the wall were old, black and white and faded from the sun. There was a photo of a little girl with a bike. Another of a dapper man whose face had faded past recognition. There was a round portrait of a lovely woman who resembled Rebecca.

“We’re a small town with not much going on. Any bit of news gets pulled and twisted like taffy.” Rebecca's fingers were strangely sharp against my scalp as she shampooed it.

I flinched, wanting to yank away, but I couldn’t. “He’s been helping James and I move in. He’s been a big help. James still loses wind fairly easily.”

“But he’s doing much better, I hear.”

I furrowed my brow. “He is.”

Rebecca took the spout and began rinsing my hair. “That's good. A strong man is good for a town.”

I was about to say something when Rebecca gasped. “I know just the perfect style for you!” She said excitedly. “Do you trust me? Oh I promise it’ll look wonderful. And if you don’t like it, you don’t have to pay.”

“I guess?” I was so taken aback I wasn’t sure what to say or do. She seemed genuinely excited.

“Wonderful!” Rebecca sighed in what sounded like bliss.

She worked for longer than I wanted to be in that chair, setting curls, and doing what I suspect was some sort of perm. I was nauseous from the chemical smell. I was set under an old hair dryer and told to relax.

When Rebecca left the room I was there alone, unable to hear anything over the roar of the hair dryer. From where I was sitting now, I could see more pictures on the wall. All old, all faded enough to where things were hard to make out. Lots of pictures of men, all of them had something wrong with the picture, the glass, even the frame. Then there was one of a young woman with dark hair all piled to one side, almost alone at the far edge.

I don’t know if it was the queasiness from the chemicals or the heat, but I was suddenly unwell. I pushed the hair dryer away and tried to stand, but I fell to my knees again. After the initial shock, I stood up shakily and pressed my hand against the wall. I inched slowly, practically dragging myself along.

A deafening crunch fell behind me, and I turned to see one of the pictures had fallen off the wall, glass glittering everywhere. I kept moving, I could explain it to Rebecca later. Then another portrait fell. Then another and another. I was trying to walk and they all fell behind me. I couldn’t move fast enough.

I almost fell at the end of the wall, gripping onto the corner. The portrait of the woman fell, hitting my arm. The sharp frame put a hole in my arm, and the searing pain turned my stomach even more. It fell to the floor face up, I fell to my knees, leaning over top of it. I could see her closely now. Her eyes staring out at me beyond the glass. I saw myself in her place, sitting poised so prettily, wearing a gown that swallowed me up like pretty flower petals. My mouth opened in the portrait, whispering for me.

I smelled smoke, and my dress began to go up in flames. I sat there, surrounded by fire and smoke, unmoving, unblinking. My skin melted away in chunks, peeling back from muscle and bone. Out before me I saw the town, I saw the women shrieking in horror, clawing at the ground as they were held back. Bodies lay at my feet, burnt, melting bodies that I was happy to see.

I smiled, looking back out upon the women. I was truly happy. Burning alive, I was the one who was no longer suffering. They were the ones who were suffering. I can’t entirely blame them. But they were all at fault as well. They could have spoken for me. But they didn’t.

I started to giggle, my mouth opened wide into a horrible laugh. I cackled, I screamed. My mouth tore open wide to red and gore. I laughed harder, I shouldn’t have been able to with all the smoke and flames. I laughed and I laughed and I laughed until there was no more pain. No more fury. Just quiet and peace on earth. True bliss.

“Wake up Lori. Wake up.”

I opened my eyes to the ceiling, seeing Jane fanning me with a magazine. “I told you that damned old hair dryer got too hot, Rebecca!”

“You try to order a new one for me then,” Rebecca huffed back. “Is she okay?”

I swallowed, but my mouth was so dry. My throat was sore beyond belief. “I’m sorry,” my voice croaked and cracked. “I’m sorry about the pictures.”

“Pictures?” Rebecca murmured.

“You passed out!” Jane said slowly and loudly to me.

I groaned and clasped my temple. “My head. I felt sick for a second.”

“Get her some water,” Jane fussed at Rebecca with hushed urgency. She turned back to me, continuing to fan me. “We called your house. Someone is coming to get you.”

I closed my eyes again, still reeling. Jane helped me sit up so I could drink water. But I tasted rancid. I wretched and bent over, throwing up onto the floor. It was all so fast, from one moment to the next it was both eternity and seconds.

There was silence between Rebecca and Jane. I didn’t stay long to say much else. I ran outside for fresh air. But for some reason all I could smell was smoke. I spat into a potted plant outside, then slid down the wall to rest and catch my breath.

“You look like her, you know?”

I opened my eyes to see an old man standing over me. “I beg your pardon?” I heaved, sweat dripping down my brow.

“Goodness, you do look like Laura. That’s not good,” the old man shook his head. “Not good at all.” He sounded frightened.

“Laura who?” I shook my head, it didn’t matter. I felt too bad to care about anything like that.

“This place ain’t good for folks like you,” he whispered. “Ma’am, you shouldn’t have come here. Not looking like that poor girl. I may be old now, but I remember it like it was yesterday. never forgot Laura Harrison. Young lady, take my hand.”

I opened my eyes to look at this old man, but all I saw was Lachlan walking up behind him. “What are you doing here?”

The old man turned around and stepped out of the way. He didn’t say so much as a word to Lachlan and he scurried as fast as he could across the street.

“Are you alright?” Lachlan knelt down beside me. He put his hand over my head, the cold was just what I needed.

I breathed out slowly, relying on his touch to save me. “I don’t know. Jane said I passed out. I threw up-” I went to point but decided he didn’t need to see that.

“Poor thing. It’s all alright now. I’ll get you home.” He smoothed his hand back towards my hair. “Do you think you can get up and walk at all?”

I tried to stand and my legs wobbled beneath me. I took a few steps and then Lachlan picked me up, swooping my legs out from under me. “Wait! It’s-” I was held against Lachlan, and at first I went rigid, but the more I was held in his grasp, the more I was comforted. I closed my eyes, relieved to be off my feet and away from the world.

I saw the woman from the portrait. Myself, I mean. I was dressed in red, sitting by the edge of the pond. A man approached and I was excited, at first I thought it was James. The light reflecting off the water hit my eyes, and I couldn’t quite see him at first. I ran to be near him and I was pulled away. The man became tied and bound, a sack with a morbid face was thrown over him. I cried for him, I screamed, losing my voice in the process. He was thrown into the water while the hands that held me all over my body, pulled my limbs, my hair, they ripped my clothes away from my body and threw me to the floor.

“-even at the garage there was only women there,” I heard my mother in law fussing. “I thought this town was nice at first, now it’s this big lesbian commune.”

“Mom,” James said sternly. “This is what you’re choosing to complain about?”

“I’m just saying-”

“Stop it. I invited you over to help me with the house so Lori wouldn’t have to worry when she gets up.” James' definitive tone made me happy. He sounded strong again. I sat up in bed, looking around at the dark room. All the curtains were drawn tight, but I could see slivers of daylight peeking through.

I sat up from bed and there was a sore, aching pain through all my limbs. What the hell happened to me? All I wanted was to get my hair done. “Fuck-” I grumbled.

“I think I hear her.” James said in a low, hushed voice. Moments later, the door opened. “You’re up. That’s great.”

“My whole body is killing me,” I groaned.

I couldn’t see James as the light back lit him. He came into the room, sitting down on the bed with me. He put his hand upon my forehead, and it was cold. “You probably need something to eat. Definitely some water.”

My eyes adjusted, and I looked up at him. Long hair draped over his shoulders and I was confused. I rubbed my eyes to focus. James' eyes were dark. No, they’re supposed to be blue, right?

“Can you get up?” He asked. His voice sounded different too.

I was more worried about my head than I was about my legs. “I think so.”

James gave me his hand and helped me up. My legs felt more sure than they did before. “There we go. Come on, some fresh air should do you some good.”

“Is she up?” My mother in law called from the kitchen.

“Yes, Mom.”

I blinked a few times, looking up at James as we stepped out. I pulled my hand away, I recognized him, but it wasn’t James. I stepped away, trying to rush along the side of the house to put space between us.

“Lori, what’s wrong?” He asked.

I shook my head, still glaring up at him. “Where’s James?”

He chuckled. “I’m James. Goodness, maybe you're allergic to whatever Rebecca used at the hair salon.” His pale hand reached for me, trying to take my hand but I yanked it away. He looked sad and frightened. “Lori!”

“Lachlan, this isn’t funny.” I glanced back into the house, seeing he was away from the door now. I ran inside, slamming the door shut and locking it. Lachlan beat upon the door and rattled the doorknob.

“Lori, honey,” James’ mother said behind me. “What’s going on, what are you doing?” She came down the hall towards me, wearing one of those gauzy, flowy caftans she liked so much.

I ran to her, grabbing her and trying to pull her away from the door. “Is this a joke? Where’s James really at?”

“Oh, Lori!” She pushed me off and went to the door, unlocking it and opening it. “Stop playing around. We’ve been worried sick about you all day.” She smiled as Lachlan came inside the house again. “James had us rush home when he heard.” She placed her hand upon his back.

“That’s not-” I stepped away, moving towards the back of the foyer. “Is this a joke?” I forced out a laugh. “Come on.”

“Maybe I should call a doctor.” My mother in law stepped away from Lachlan and I darted back into the kitchen. I grabbed the car keys on the table and I ran outside and around the house. I was heading towards the car when Lachlan opened the front door.

“Lori, get back here!” He sounded so concerned. “You’re scaring me.”

I was about to reach the car when I was grabbed from behind. “Lori! I’m so glad you’re okay!” Jane’s hand held me in a death grip. “How’re you feeling?”

I yanked my arm, trying to free myself. I had been trying to stay calm, but this was making me panic. “Let go of me!”

“Thank you, Mrs. Lancaster,” Lachlan sighed with relief. “I think she’s still a bit loopy. It’s like she doesn’t recognize me.”

“I told Rebecca she needed to update her equipment,” Jane scoffed. She handed me over to Lachlan and it was like my body was quitting.

“It’s alright.” Lachlan scooped me up in his arms like he did before. “I’ll put her back to bed.” He carried me inside, Jane watching us intently the entire time.

Once inside, Lachlan took me into the bedroom and set me back down upon the bed. “Lay down. I’ll go get you some water-”

I knocked his hand away from me. “What’re you doing? You’re not James. I know who you are.”

Lachlan looked me over with a gaze I couldn’t read. He touched my face with that cold hand of his. My body relaxed despite my nerves still frying at the ends. He laid me back, brushing my hair away from my face.

“You won’t get hurt again. Not this time,” he whispered.  “No one is around to put their filthy hands on you,” his voice grew dark and raspy. “No one to drag us apart. You came back to me. After all this time.”

Tears ran down my eyes. “Lachlan-”

He pulled the blanket over me and tucked me in. “Don’t worry, Laura. I can protect you now. I promise.” Lachlan lifted my hand, placing it upon his gaunt face. Tears streamed out of his eyes and his skin felt slimy and slick. I wanted to pull away, but I always didn’t want him to cry despite everything that was happening.

“Laura,” he whimpered pathetically, falling over onto the bed. “My Laura!” he sobbed while I laid there.

Eventually my eyes closed, and I saw fire spread out before me.

[bellysoupset]

Heyy soupppp! You tagged you were requesting for Bell and Luke so maybe this could work? 😭

Luke is hanging w the guys, Jonah, Leo, Vince, and he’s already pretty out of it, and he falls asleep while the rest are playing video games or sm (idk)

When he wakes up it’s dark, he’s sweating, and he pukes on the floor. His fever is so high he’s delerious, crying, and finds Vince, he takes his temperature, panics, gets Jonah and decides he needs a hospital?

xoxo

No hospital in this one, sorry, but I think I got everything else!

----------------------------

Leo was sure they were doing this for his benefit and part of him thought he should be embarrassed, but he really wasn't. He had missed spending time with his friends so much, Leo couldn't care less what had motivated their little "boys night".

It had been almost a full month since everything had gone down and he was back into therapy twice a week. His boss had pulled him aside asking if there was something she should know, thanks to his week long absence leave he had taken, but when Leo had brushed it off as just a family emergency, coupled with a hellish flu — an excuse Wendy had been happy to corroborate as his "doctor" —, she had left him alone.

His coworkers weren't as easy to convince, Leo had caught Sandy, Dean and Chuck whispering and all three of them had approached him separately to ask if everything was okay. Chuck seemed convinced it was something related to Jonah, judging by how he had squinted when Jon appeared to pick Leo up, seeming incredibly confused as if he had made up his mind about them breaking up, when nothing in reality supported that rumor.

"Yo," Vince slung an arm around Leo's neck and pressed their foreheads together, "get out of your head and help me with the beers."

"I'm not in my head," Leo bitched, following Vince to the kitchen, "I'm thinking- Oh, hi baby," he dropped to a crouched down position, finding JD happily eating away her food. The cat rubbed her head lazily against his hand, before getting back to the task, ignoring his pets.

"I said help, not come pet the kitty cat," Vince groaned, grabbing multiple beer packs and passing them along to Leo, "thanks- Luke's late. Amazing how he's never on time."

Leo snorted at the whining, then started tearing up the beer packs in order to plant the bottles on top of the table, while Vince hummed a song under his breath, making the snacks. He had shown up earlier than everyone, with his arms filled with grocery bags to prepare bruschetta and other Italian goodies.

Despite the music playing, Vince shared Leo's musical taste and they had been secretly playing Kit Howard since Luke wasn't there, they both heard Jonah outside the front door, his keys jiggling and also his voice as he talked with Luke.

"You guys started without us?" Jonah asked, stepping inside and moving straight to their sound system to change the music. No matter how quick he was, Lucas had clearly heard it, because he was frowning as he walked in.

"I brought dessert," he said in an annoyed manner, holding up a huge box of cupcakes. Behind his back, Leo cringed to Vince, gesturing how annoyed their friend was.

Vin planted his hands on his hip, "fucking finally guys, we almost lost the game!"

Leo was having a blast. They watched the soccer game while sprawled in the living room and stuffing their faces and, of course, Jonah and Luke were cheering for opposite teams, so they were yelling bloody murder at each other by the time the game ended.

Vince was down on the ground, more than a little tipsy, playing with JD and giggling, shoving Luke's leg playfully, "oh my god, sit down, you prick!"

"It was clearly a fault!"

"You're such a sore loser, Atwood, grow uuuup," Jonah retorted, planting his fingers in his ears to ignore him and Leo cackled, not lost on him how childish his fiancé was acting.

"Real Madrid would've won if your stupid team wasn't cheating," Luke glared, grabbing a cupcake angrily and shoving it entirely in his mouth.

Leo was shaking with laughter as he heard Jonah start to argue it wasn't cheating if Chelsea was simply superior. Across the room the phone was ringing, so he crawled on the couch to go grab it, giggling as he shushed the other three.

"Yeah?"

"Mr. Wagner? It's Matt, from the front desk-"

"Oh shit, hi Matt. I'm guessing the neighbors are complaining about the noise?" Leo cringed, turning down the music and heard a sigh.

"Yes, sir. I need you to tune it down and to remind you that parties are only allowed with the administration's permit," Leo rolled his eyes, he abhorred this HOA rules, but he knew Matt was only doing his job.

"I know, I'm sorry. It's not a party, we're just watching the game and they got a little riled up. We'll be quiet."

"Thank you, sir! Have a good night!"

"Thanks Matt, you too," Leo hung up, then turned to glare at the group, "shut up all of you, the neighbors are complaining about the noise."

"Him and his stupid fucking team," Luke mumbled darkly, grabbing the cupcake box and sitting down in the couch, slapping Jonah's hand sharply when the man tried getting one.

"I said, hush," Leo flicked at Luke's ear, "the Olympics are on, you guys wanna watch the gymnastics solo?"

"I thought that was yesterday!" Jonah perked up, shoving Luke's head so he could grab three cupcakes and they all settled down to watch the beautiful floor routine from Simone Biles. It was probably the one thing Luke and Jon both agreed on, so they were fairly quiet and the previous animosity melted easily.

After Olympics, they switched up to a video game and it was Leo's turn to all but hiss at Jonah, while Vince and Luke watched, since neither of them cared much about that.

They played only one round of Apex each, then switched up to Mario Kart so Vince could join, at what point Luke had already spread out in the bigger couch and was playing quietly with JD, sulking.

"Don't be a horrible loser, you're not five," Jonah passed him a controller, "stop sul-"

"I'm not sulking," Lucas groaned, pushing the controller away, "I'm sleepy, today was a long day. I think I just wanna sit here, you guys play."

They all exchanged an amused glance, Lucas was definitely sulking. However, they had learned long before to just let him ride out the poutiness, so they kept playing for another one hour and a half, when exhaustion caught up with them.

It was a Friday night, so both Vince and Luke were crashing there, their respective girlfriend (and wife) had their own thing going on, because Bella was going to NYC with Wendy so they could watch the Family Addams play.

Leo yawned, resting his head on Jonah's shoulder, "I think we should call it a night," he was pleasantly buzzed, almost in drunk territory but not quite and every surface felt so soft... He looked to his right, to Jonah, the giggles as he looked past his shoulder and saw Luke was curled up, knocked out, and JD was sleeping almost on top of his head, "that's sooo cute, Vin-"

"On it," Vince didn't need to be told, as he crawled on the rug to get a picture, fixing JD's tail so it looked like a hat on top of Luke's head, "send it in the group chat, Bella will love it."

Leo did just that, leaning fully against Jonah and not missing how burpy his boyfriend was. They stared at the screen expectantly, then Bella sent a picture of them in the traffic jam, Wendy curled up against the passenger window, wearing a sleeping mask and a thick hairband that had cat ears on top.

Bells: they're matching 🥰

Jonah snorted and Vince let out an amused huff, sending a bunch of hearts about his girlfriend, then he yawned, "let's call it a night?"

Thirty minutes later most of the trash was put away and Leo was changed into his PJs. He walked down the hallway to throw a blanket on top of Luke and retrieve his cat, pulling JD to his chest and smiling as he noticed how much she was purring.

Vince was in the guest bathroom, flossing, so Leo leaned on the door and knocked, "I got Luke some blankets and there's extras for you in the guest room-" he yawned, "and the fridge is all yours, you know the drill."

"Ioweeeill," Vince agreed, the words coming out all mangled since he was busy. Leo smiled, patting his friend's arm softly, then turned around to go to the master suite.

Jonah was in bed already, sitting up against the headboard and muffling deep burps against his fist, while JD napped on his lap.

"Beer got to you?" Leo guessed, turning off the lights and shutting the door, crawling on the bed.

"Uhm, it'll pass in a minute," Jonah's voice was all soft, he was definitely a little drunk, "come cuddle."

Leo locked their legs together, pressing his cheek to Jon's bicep and rolling on his side, so he could move his hand between smoothing JD's fur and rubbing his fiance's belly.

---------------------------------

Luke hadn't been feeling well since morning. That was the truth, he had felt pretty damn shitty since he opened his eyes and had even skipped gym, something he never did, in lieu of lying in bed and trying to force himself to go to work.

He had wanted nothing more than to cancel all plans, but Bella was vibrating with excitement about her plans with Wendy so he didn't want her to know he was feeling gross and consider staying behind.

It was the same logic that got him to actually show up to his night plans. He felt horrid, but it was their first time all together since the mess with Leo and Luke didn't want to mess it up. Hell, Vince was driving four hours and missing a cool weekend with his girlfriend for this, Luke could suck it up about the lethargic feeling that kept trying to pull him down.

He had chugged an energy drink on his way there and plastered a smile on, that had quickly turned into a frown thanks to all of Jonah's picking on him, but thankfully his friends had chalked that up as their usual prickliness and laughed it off.

Lucas was feeling almost proud of himself when he fell asleep to the track of his friends laughing and JD's heat near his face.

He should've known better.

Luke woke up drenched in sweat and feeling like his heart was racing, drumming in his ears. He was flat on his back on the couch and was shivering, like they had left the balcony's door open and the freezing night air was inside.

He sucked in the air, feeling more than a little desperate and... Scared? For some reason? Then his stomach lurched suddenly and Luke coughed, nearly drowning himself. He managed to roll on his side in time to retch a large stream of vomit on the ground and Luke let out a pained whine.

His throat and nose hurt, since he had almost choked, and his stomach felt awful. He was sorely regretting everything he had eaten during the night, in his effort to force normalcy. All the damn cupcakes were churning inside and he could taste the chocolate on the back of his throat...

Lucas sat up, wrapping an arm around his stomach and waiting for the room to quit spinning. HIs head felt like it weighted more than it did, lolling to the side and causing Luke to plant a hand over his lips, muffling a wet belch in it.

He didn't want to cause a mess. Well, a bigger mess. Luke grabbed on the couch and forced himself up, wavering dangerously as wooziness washed him over, then blindly moved around the room. His mouth was watering all over again and he couldn't fight a sick burp, which caused liquid fill his mouth, but he gulped it down, all but falling inside the guest bathroom.

It was like his body was painfully aware this was a safe zone, because Luke didn't even have a chance to move over to the toilet, squeezing his stomach as another cramp hit and then coughing, struggling to breathe, when the motion set off a projectile stream of vomit all over the fucking tiles and down his front.

His knees buckled and Luke curled up, more than a little disgusted and humiliated, his thoughts a wind whirl- dark spots clumping together...

-----------

Jon woke up with a weight on his chest and it took him a minute to realize he was looking straight into his cat's big blue eyes. He frowned, blindly reaching to push her off his chest and causing the kitten to meow.

"G'away," Jonah rolled on the bed, still dizzy with sleep, snuggling up with Leo and hiding his nose in the crook of his fiancé's neck- There were whispers outside his door and he let out a sigh, rolling back so he was facing the ceiling.

"What do you mean don't tell Jonah, Luke?!" Vince's voice, louder than a whisper, filtered through the closed door and caused Jon to snort in amusement.

What were the two idiots up to?

He glanced at the bedside table clock, while JD climbed on his lap once more, nibbling at his fingertips when his hand automatically went to pet her. 3:23 AM. Definitely far too late for some secretive midnight snack.

Jonah leaned in, kissing JD between her ears, "keep daddy company," he whispered, before picking her up and slotting her in the little space that Leo left since he was curled up on his side.

The closer he got to the door, though, the less the whispers sounded humorous, turning frantic and distraught... Jonah tiptoed out of the room, hitting the hallway's light switch, "what is going on?"

Chaos erupted.

Luke let out a cry, while Vince shouted "JON!", behind him JD jumped from the bed and came to meow at his feet and Jonah's stomach reacted before he could fully realize the mess in his hallway, causing him to gag.

He swallowed, pressing a fist to his mouth, trying to piece together what was going on. Vince was crouched down in front of Luke, who had fallen flat on his back near the guest bathroom door and there was vomit... Well, everywhere. On Vince's and Luke's shirts, all over the ground near Luke's head, leading up inside the bathroom...

"Please, don't be mad..." Luke whined and Jonah's stomach froze over, not with nausea, but guilt and misplaced anger. He scoffed, shaking his head and stepping closer to the mess, despite his body begging him to turn away.

"What happened?" Jonah crouched next to them and Vince's shoulders sagged with visible relief.

"I- I don't know, I woke up just now and he had already fallen and was throwing up everywhere and- and-" he cupped Luke's red cheeks, "he's burning up, Jon-"

"Grab the thermometer in our bathroom," Jonah instructed, moving his hands so they were in Lucas's neck, "and wake up Leo."

"O-okay-" Vince jumped up and rushed away, while Jonah tried to ignore the way their sick friend was sweating buckets, fever so high he was shaking as if he was freezing.

"Don't tell Jon..." Luke groaned, pressing his forehead to the inside of Jonah's wrist, while the other man checked his vitals. Luke's heart was racing, "please, Vin-"

"I'm not mad," Jonah glared at him, grabbing Luke's ruined shirt by the shoulder and using all his strength to pull his friend sitting up, instead of lying on the groud, "c'mon-"

"Uhm," Luke moaned, Adam's apple bobbing up and down, "don'feel-good..." his words stuck together and he folded in the middle, all but drooling over his lap, "I want Bell..."

Jonah's own heart was racing now and he turned his head to holler, "VINCE, WHERE'S THE DAMN THERMOMETHER!?"

That caused some rustling inside the bedroom and Vince rushed out, holding the little device, as well as the bathroom trash and a bunch of towels, with Leo hot in his heels, although the blonde looked half asleep still.

"Here-" Vince dropped to his knees in the sick covered hallway, mess be damned, "what do I do...?"

"Luke," Jonah patted the other man's cheek, nervously, "hey. Lucas, Luke-" Luke finally opened his eyes, although they were dazed and confused, "look at me. Hey-"

"Jon...?" Lucas frowned, gulping down, "I'm sorry, I- I tried to stop-"

"It's okay, it's okay," it was terrifying to have Luke apologizing to him of all people, "you think you can hold the thermometer in your mouth?"

"Do we really have to? Anyone can tell he's got a fever," Vince protested and Jonah raised a hand to shut him up.

"I- Ye-yeah..." Luke nodded, squeezing his eyes shut, "I don't feel good..."

"We know, buddy," Leo had moved closer as well and was holding JD to stop her from getting her paws dirty, "Jon's gonna help, alright...?"

Luke sniffled pitifully and Jonah forced the thermometer in his mouth and under the tongue, checking the time on Vince's phone, since the man was the only one who had one.

"I'm gonna start cleaning this," Leo decided, squeezing Jonah's shoulder as he got up, "and put JD away."

"What do I do?" Vince asked in a small, worried voice, eyes glued to Luke's face, "this was so out of nowhere-"

"You're gonna help me get him in the shower," Jonah explained, "let's just wait a minute..."

Under his hand, Luke jerked and gagged, pressing his lips tightly around the plastic of the thermometer. He moved a hand to wrap around his stomach, but Vin held his wrist, "no, Luke, your shirt is covered in sick..."

"-urtsss," Lucas moaned, sniffling again and gulping down once more. A thin line of drool started to run from his bottom lip to his lap, as he was unable to fully close his mouth. He gagged and Jonah rushed to retrieve the device, as he heard the disgusting noise of liquid splashing...

It was just in time. Vince shoved the trashcan under Luke's chin and Jonah's hand was barely out of the line of fire as more vomit rushed up and splattered inside the bin.

Jonah glanced at the thermometer, a new one they had gotten after Leo complained about their European device one too many times, and cringed. 103.5ºF

Next to him, Lucas retched loudly once more and Vince rubbed his back in a reassuring manner, although his face was desperate as he said, "Jon!?"

"Lucas," Jonah moved so he could cup his friend's burning forehead and rubbed his opposite arm, "we're gonna get you up, okay?"

Instead of answering, Luke just nodded dizzily, and Vince removed the bin from his lap, wrapping an arm around Lucas' waist, while Jon did the same. Together, they pulled him up quickly to his feet, causing the man to let out a loud groan and pitch forward with a gag, bringing up another mouthful of bile all over the floor, just as Leo returned with a bucket and a mop, causing the blonde to cringe.

"Jesus," Leo winced, "that's some virus..."

Luke shook with a hiccup, which quickly turned into a sob and he crumpled towards Vince's side, hiding his burning face against his friend's shoulder and bawling.

"Aw man, it's okay, I got you..." Vince cooed, rubbing Luke's back while Jonah started to guide all three of them inside the ruined guest bathroom.

Jon side stepped the mess on the ground, gagging harshly himself and stopping in the middle of the way, still squeezing Luke's bicep, so he could spit inside the toilet. The lid was lifted, but the water clear, Lucas had never even made it inside the bathroom.

"Jon?" Leo poked his head inside the bathroom and Jonah shook his head, lips pressed in a line, swallowing down a burp.

"I'm fine," he pulled them further in, inside the shower area. Besides him, Luke let out another hiccup-sob, tears running down his swollen face, completely out of it.

Jonah opened the shower, turning the registers until the water was from lukewarm, ignoring the fact he was getting completely soaked as well, "Okay, c'mere-" he moved out of the stream, so they could hold Luke under it and the man immediately let out a pained yelp, very similar to the noise JD made when they accidentally stepped on her tail.

"Hurts..." he whimpered, sobbing harder, "please- pleasssstop... Why are you doin'this?"

Over his head, Vince looked mortified, and Jonah understood the feeling well. Last time he had seen Luke this distraught, had been back in Christmas when he was sick while in the midst of depression, but even then the fever hadn't been this high.

"You think he had a fever before?" Vince voiced his thoughts, worry coloring his words as he hugged Luke close, all but rocking him under the water, "shhh, bud, almost over."

"Probably," Jonah answered gruffly, turning around and starting to peel off Luke's soaked, sick covered shirt, "there's no way this climbed this high so quickly."

"What can I do?" Leo entered the bathroom, now with three towels draped over his arm, having just ditched the mop, "hallway is clean and living room too."

"Living room?" Jon frowned, glancing at Vince, who looked just as confused.

Leo cringed, nodding, "yeah, living room, I think he woke up sick..." Between them, Luke let out a groan and suddenly stopped crying- His knees buckled and both Vince and Jonah let out a shout as they almost went down with his weight.

"Oh my God," Vince cursed, stepping all over the place and forgetting Jonah was holding half of Luke's weight as he moved to fully grab his best friend, "Luke- Lucas, please, please, open your eyes-"

"Vin," Leo said in a small voice, "Vince, he's coming back to, calm down-" the blonde stepped almost inside the shower area, planting a hand on Vince's back in a reassuring way.

Lucas let out a little moan as he came back to, with Vince still patting his cheek frantically and all but snarling, "aren't you a doctor?! Do something!" at Jon.

"Was-what's going on-" Lucas' voice was raspy, but lucid, and all of them breathed out in relief. Jonah turned off the water, while Luke started to shiver violently, "M'fff-freezin'-"

"Yeah, we're gonna get you dried up," Jonah let go of his arm, side stepping Lucas and Vince, since Vin had a vice-like grip on the man, and as soon as he stepped out of the shower area Leo threw a towel over his head, starting to rub it in.

Jon squeezed his boyfriend's hand, but pulled away, stepping out of the rug so Vince could drag Luke there. The bathroom wasn't built for four men, so Jon was forced to step back in the wet section, while Luke fell sit in the still open toilet and Leo and Vin started to dry him up as if he was a toddler.

"Luke," Jonah wanted to touch him, but there was no space, "when did you start to feel sick?"

"Morning," was Luke's lethargic answer, head lolling with sleep, "I don't feel well..."

"Are you gonna be sick again?" Leo looked up from his crouched down position as they stripped Luke out of his soaked sweat pants, "Luke?"

"Hmmmm... No," he breathed in, "I'm sorry I got sick everywhere..."

"Shut up about that," Jon glared at his friend and Vince scoffed, rubbing the towel vigorously over Lucas' wavy hair, with so much force he was creating curls.

"Let's get him up-" Leo said and Vince was about to do just that, when the blonde shook his head, "you're getting water everywhere, dry yourself. Jon can help me."

"You two can't-" Vince started to protest and Leo glared at him.

"He's our best friend too," he said in a calm, but serious voice, "we can handle him. Dry yourself, you don't wanna get a cold on top of this mess."

Jonah decided he didn't need to explain contagion didn't happen like that, feeling a swell of pride at Leo voicing what he was thinking. He circled Vince, exchanging places with him, and helped Leo get Luke up.

They stumbled into the guest bedroom, which was the closest one. The bed was already unmade, since Vin had been sleeping there and Luke collapsed against the pillows with a heavy sigh, brows meeting in a frown.

"What hurts?" Jonah asked, going for the dresser where they left most of their older clothes for guests, and stripping of his wet pajamas, sliding on some new sweatpants.

"Head," Luke rolled on his side, until his head was resting on Leo's lap and the blonde promptly started combing his fingers through his hair, stroking lightly at Luke's cheeks.

"Like a migraine?" he asked in a whisper and Luke shook his head, while Jonah rushed out of the room to get their first aid kit. Once he came back, not a full minute later, Vince was inside the bedroom, now clad in his spare set of boxers and nothing else, curled up in the bed with Lucas and Leo.

Jon scoffed, pausing at the doorway, "do I need to explain you guys don't wanna catch this plague?"

"Get in here," Leo rolled his eyes, "you can fit right here."

"Are you crazy?" Jonah pouted, planting the first aid kit on top of the dresser and fishing out an antipyretic, as well as a painkiller, "Luke, are you still feeling sick?"

"No," the man's voice was sleepy, as his head was still in Leo's lap and he was being lulled to sleep by the hair pets, "stomach hurts."

"Yeah, that's because you puked things you ate back when you were three," Vince joked weakly, squirming on the bed so he could rest his own head on Luke's thigh and starting to rub his friend's belly, "this alright?"

"Get him to drink this," Jon climbed on the bed, over Vince's legs and handed the pills to Leo. He was planning to climb back out, but then Luke grabbed the cords of his hoodie and Jon nearly faceplanted over all of them.

The bed let out a whine under their weight and Vince snorted, "this thing is gonna go down with us."

"Here, swallow this," Leo pushed the two pills unceremoniously inside of Luke's mouth and caused the man to splutter and almost bite his fingers.

Lucas swallowed with a grimace, then curled up even further, "you guys are warm..."

Jonah sighed, collapsing between all three of them, resting his cheek on his hand and draping his legs over Vince's. Clearly, no one was going anywhere.

Luke met his eyes, little pained lines around them, but no longer the previous confusion, "Thank you..." he closed his eyes, relaxing, as Jon reached in and pushed his bangs back, brushing his thumb over Leo's knuckles buried in Luke's hair.

The blonde smiled at him, then squirmed until he was lying down instead of sitting against the headboard, causing Luke's head to rest fully against his tummy instead of his lap. Vince moved closer and Jonah went boneless, resting his cheek to Leo's thigh and planting a kiss there, feeling exhaustion catch up with him as the adrenaline wore off.

Last thing he heard before fully passing out was JD sneaking back into the guest room and climbing the bed so she could snuggle up against Vince's tummy.

[loveshotzz]

pretend i wrote this when you were sick - pretend it's also not this long. also sorry if it looks like there are parts missing.

He's on his third call while he waits at the door in the early spring breeze, unbottoned work shirt billowing with him -- silently chastising himself for not throwing on a sweater since you told him to do it before he left. He presses the bell again, hearing it go off in the house for the second time, anxiety brewing in his chest. He'd never seen you so sick, and even though the doctor said it was just a bad flu, seeing you in bed like this made his heart pound. He wasn't sleeping, had been working from home the past few days. He'd set up shop right outside the hall of the bedroom, ignoring his office so he could hear if you called out to him -- Bandit dutifully keeping watch over you at the end of the bed. It was something he wasn't expecting to affect him like this, his thoughts getting clouded with the sound of hospital monitors and oxygen machines.

You did your best to understand and assure him you're okay -- you're just kind of a baby about being sick. Lucky for Steve, he's been loving a chance to get to baby you - despite the ache it causes to see you like this.

But the babying would start even quicker if the front door of the house he was in front of would open.

"Honey, am I gonna have to file a report? You can't just be showing up to my house -- I got a wife at home," the tease comes from a familiar smoky voice, "Do you really want her to find out about us?"

"I called three times," Steve huffs, "I said I'd only be gone for ten minutes."

"Do you really think she's counting? She's probably asleep. Plus, you're a minute man," Eddie winks, beckoning him into the house, "And if she calls you can run right home, you're around the fuck--effing corner."

"Yeah, you're around the effing corner, Big Guy," Gwen's tiny voice repeats from the island in the kitchen.

"Gwendolyn," Eddie warns. "Sorry," she whispers back, "I won' say id again."

"Thank you, doll," he smiles, "Can you ask mommy to bring the soup and meds we packed up for your aunt so we can give it to Steve?" She patters away with her light up sneakers glinting pink and purple with every step, disappearing into the house only to run back winded a few minutes later. "Mommy said you have two hands that work just fine so you can get it," she smiles, not fully understanding what she means, "And then she said to say please after. Please!"

Steve snorts, "Yeah, loser, go grab my shi--stuff."

Eddie rolls his eyes, "Whatever."

As her father leaves, Gwen climbs back up on the bar stool and looks up at Steve curiously, "So when does she get to come back over?"

"When she feels better, angel," he smiles, "Why?"

She shrugs, "I dunno, I like when she comes over 'cause then it's not just you."

His mouth gapes with a smile, "What do you mean? Am I not enough for you?"

Gwen shrugs in the way four year olds shrug when they're feeling sneaky, "She's juss funner, Big Guy." "Do you hear this?!" Steve gasps as Eddie re-enters, "She doesn't think I'm as fun."

"You haven't been playing 'Cool Barbies' with her, lately," Eddie shrugs, popping the two tote bags filled with sick day amenities on the table, "Ow, ow Lu, don't pull daddy's hair, please." "It's okay Luce, you can do whatever you want," Steve coos to the baby on Eddie's hip, grabbing the bags and putting them over his shoulder. He leans forward to kiss her only for Eddie to step away.

"Dude, not with your potential flu germs -- they're picking up enough sh--stuff at daycare," Eddie says, taking the baby's pudgy hand and waving, "Say byyyyeee Big Guy." "Bah," Lucy gurgles in her post nap haze, head resting heavily on Eddie's shoulder. "Bye, Big Guy," Gwen smiles, hugging him at the knees, "Tell Auntie-I-said-hi-and-I-miss-her-and-love-her-and-that-she-is-so-pretty-and-that-I-have-new-Barbies."

"I will tell her, thank you for the message," Steve nods, chest hammering again at the thought of you sick and bed without him. He flicks his head up at Eddie, "Tell Peach I said hi."

"Yeah, I'll tell her somethin' alright," he half grumbles, hoisting Lucy higher up on his hip. Steve blows Gwen a kiss before making it back to you in the quick trip is takes to get back to your place. He knocks softly before stepping in, hearing your soft 'hm?' that sets his whole body a buzz with affection. "I have..." he starts, opening the bags, "Two quarts of Peach's famous 'sick soup', a shit ton of orange juice, 800mg motrin, a card from Gwen, a drawing from Gwen, three new pairs of fuzzy socks, a toy for Bandit? Okay..." He lists off the rest of the care package before looking at you with a smirk, "And absolutely nothing for me." "I can gib you someding," you murmur out with a stuffed nose, "I can gib you a kiss." "Ooh, how about I give you a kiss tough girl?" he asks, chestnut hair falling into his eyes as he leans down to kiss your forehead. His lips are warms against your clammy skin, enough to soothe you back into a cozy half sleep under the covers, "How're you feelin'?" "Dired," you admit, "Bud I could really use thad soup." "Okay," he nods, "I'll heat it up for you." He gets back to the door looking back with a soft gaze on you, thinking of Lucy's face and how it looks when you hold her on your hip, how you look when you play Barbies with Gwen. How it would look when there's a baby that's the perfect blend of the two of you bouncing on your lap, when there's a baby monitor in the bedroom, when you're both complaining about germs at daycare. He opens his mouth to say something, but closes it before going downstairs. Right now, babying you is just enough.

CAROL!!!! Stop 😩 I physically cannot handle this amount of yearning. What have you done to me?!? I’m still sick (it won’t go away) so this was still perfect. Of course he’s imagining getting me pregnant while taking care of me, ILL GIVE THAT OLD MAN ANYTHING HE WANTS!!

Also shout out to the number one couple here and that’s ocs!eddie and airwiy!steve. I love that the little glimpse we get of them living close to each other now and the little growth of the munson family 🥺

[pensat-i-fet]

Better than me (Rúben Dias x Reader)

**Back with another request. For this one, I was asked to write about Rúben feeling a little insecure and jealous too. I think it turned out quite cute so hopefully you enjoy too ❤️**

Word count: 2561

Masterlist

Wattpad

"We're fucked!"

Rúben was in a terrible mood after the match. They won, so that was good. But Rodri, arguably their most important player, got a red card. So he was bound to miss at least the next three matches. Fantastic.

"Huh?", you asked, quickly looking up from your phone while he drove.

"The next few matches. It'd be hard to win without Rodri".

"Well, sure. But they have you so it'll be fine".

He wasn't so sure but appreciated your compliments and optimism.

Rúben hadn't been feeling very optimistic himself lately. Or great. And one of the main reasons for that was you. Not that you had done anything per se but…the insecurity he felt was mainly caused by your intelligence and your friendship with Rodri.

You had met Laura, Rodri's partner, at work. Both of you being young doctors, an instant friendship blossomed between you two. Also, you always wanted to learn to speak Spanish so having a Spanish friend was great. And Rodri became a friend quickly too so that was two Spanish friends.

It was through these friends you met Rúben. Laura thought it could be fun to introduce you to each other and play matchmaker. Both of you were grateful for that. And, of course, double dates were a constant occurrence once you and Rúben made your relationship official.

Since everyone always praised Rodri for being the humble guy who went to uni and dated a doctor, and basically not being the typical footballer, Rúben expected the same when people found out about your relationship but…the reaction was slightly different. Not that anyone saw Rúben as stupid or anything but he wasn't considered to be as smart as Rodri. Where was his uni diploma? So what he saw was many comments asking how such a smart woman could be with him. Banter mostly, but it could hurt.

"Do you need help with your wound?", you asked when you noticed you were almost back home.

Rúben had a little wound on his thigh and one of the perks of dating a doctor was that you could look after it.

"I'm good. Thanks".

"It could still get infected, you know?"

"I know. I'm not dumb".

His tone confused you. Where did that reaction come from? But he had been in a terrible mood since the match ended so you guessed it was all about that. Little did you know…

And he had reasons to worry. City were out of the Carabao Cup after losing their match against Newcastle. Rodri didn't play…but neither did Rúben. So none of them were to blame for it.

But then came the Wolves match. Rúben started that match and quickly made his mark…by scoring an own goal. You were watching the match at home and hoping he could turn it around during what was left of the match. Otherwise, he was going to blame himself for the loss. You just knew it.

“Hey”.

“Hi”, he said back, sighing and sitting down next to you.

“Want cuddles?”

“Will they make my own goal disappear?”

“I wish but they can make you feel a bit better”.

You turned the TV off and laid down so Rúben could do the same next to you and you cuddled. It felt nice after a long week at work. And it was nice for Rúben to feel loved after such a tough day.

Rúben’s phone broke the peace and he had to get up to answer it.

“It’s my parents. I’ll be right back”.

You used that time to go to the kitchen and see what you two could have for dinner. And while you were still deciding, Rúben came back from the room.

“Everything ok?”

“Yes, they just wanted to see how I was doing”.

“That’s nice”, you smiled and went back to looking at the fridge. “We don’t have much. Maybe we could order something”.

“Yeah. We’ll go to the supermarket tomorrow. That fridge looks so empty and sad”.

You chuckled. It really did. “We’ll do the shopping list later. Let’s order food now. I’m starving”.

The whole time at dinner, you tried to make Rúben feel better. He could be so dramatic after one bad match and you didn't want him to stay in that mindset for long.

"Ok, dishwasher full and ready. Should we do that shopping list now?"

"Yes!", you answered, getting your notes app ready to write down all the things you needed to get. "Let's not go crazy with the fresh food, we just need enough for you".

"What do you mean? Are you not planning on eating?"

"I won't be here to eat. Didn't you read my text?"

Rúben picked up his phone. He had ignored it after the match, except to answer his parents' call. But there it was, your text. Well, there was more than one but he knew which one you meant. The one where you said you were going to spend a few days in Madrid with Laura…and with Rodri.

You kept checking the kitchen to see what you might need and didn’t notice Rúben staring at his phone.

“I think I need shampoo. I’m going to check”.

He then looked up to see you going to the bathroom and sighed. “I hate this”.

But the next morning, he drove both of you to the supermarket to do the weekly shop. And every time you mentioned picking up something for the trip, he wanted to scream.

“Do you think I need a plug for my chargers? Spanish plugs are different to ours. Or will Laura have enough for all of us? Maybe I should call her”.

“I’m sure Rodri has it all under control”, he muttered and you turned to give him a look.

“Ok? I'll still ask”.

That was the first little dig. Then came the second, and the third…

“Rúben, have you and Rodri had any issues lately?”, you finally asked.

“No. Why would you ask?”

“I don’t know, but you keep being weird whenever he’s mentioned for no reason. Maybe we should cancel tonight’s dinner”.

“Tonight…what happens tonight?”

“Rúben, we talked about having dinner with them a week ago. I put it on your calendar”.

“Right…yeah…no, I’ll go. We’ll go. It’ll be fine”.

And it was fine, for the most part. You still noticed Rúben acting in an odd way but didn’t want to bring attention to it.

“We can’t wait to show you around Madrid”, said Laura. “Well, Rodri will be the tour guide. It’s his city. You’ll love it”.

“I know I will”.

“I actually got the perfect tour ready for you”, told you Rodri. “Since I didn’t have to play, I got some free time to get it all sorted. I checked all the places I think you’ll like to prioritize those. It's a perfect plan”.

“That’s so thoughtful. Thank you”, you said. Your smile was so big and that made Rúben feel so shitty again.

“You’ll have to see if you prefer Lisbon or Madrid”, joked Rodri, winking at Rúben but Rúben didn’t want to laugh.

“Well, Lisbon was amazing so you’ll have to really prepare the best tour to make me love Madrid more”.

“How did Rúben show you his city when you first went there?”, asked Laura. Such an innocent question, but not what Rúben wanted to hear.

“I didn’t prepare anything special. Just showed her around”.

Everyone at the table noticed Rúben’s tone and decided to move on to other topics, but you didn’t get his response out of your head. You couldn’t. So you had to bring it up when you were back home.

“What was all that about at dinner?”

“What do you mean?”

“You got all moody when Laura asked you about us being in Lisbon and seeing the city”.

He sighed. “I just don’t get why you are with me sometimes”.

What was he saying now?

That was a pretty strange statement. And one that made you stop to think about how to approach it.

“I could make you a list”, you tried a joke. Those worked sometimes. But not at that specific moment.

“And then I could make you one that shows why you should be with someone like Rodri instead”.

Someone like Rodri? “Why would I want to be with someone like him?”

“He’s not even your boyfriend and still is better at being one than me. I mean, preparing a tour just for you? Come on. He can do everything better than me. On and off the pitch”.

“Are you bothered by that?”

“I’m bothered by how inferior I feel next to him”.

“Since when?”, he never mentioned that.

“Since the first comment about how hard to believe it was that a doctor would date a football player”.

“But Rodri…he does too. So do others. Didn’t Mata date one? Maybe he still does”.

“Yes, and what do they have in common?”

“They are from Spain?”

Rúben let his head fall and put his hands on his face. It was all in his head, he knew it. He knew you couldn’t understand him. And he felt too dumb to explain it properly.

“They are both humble. Normal. Too normal to be footballers. And smart. Of course business degree Rodri can date a doctor. But me? I’m a joke next to them”.

You sat down next to him and took one of his hands in between yours, placing it on your thigh.

“Rúben, you’re smart. I wouldn’t date you if you weren’t”, he looked away but you continued. “Everyone knows you’re smart. On and off the pitch. You keep being praised for your intelligence all the time. And it makes me proud to see that. Also, you speak two languages fluently and I almost fainted trying to say the few sentences you taught me in Portuguese. That level of fluency takes brainpower. And you have plenty of it”.

“The comments…”.

“Maybe you should stop reading comments of people talking about relationships they are not a part of. What do they know? About you or about Rodri? Nothing. I’m the one who knows you and who chooses to be with you. Shouldn’t my opinion mean more?”

“Yes, but…”, he knew you were right but still didn’t feel like he could accept it fully. “But what if I’m not enough in the future? There is a limit to my intelligence, you know? I’m not studying. I don’t keep on learning like you do. The most I do is watch a documentary every once in a while”.

“I don’t need you to be a bloody encyclopedia, Rúben!”

“But I want to be one so I don’t embarrass you!”

He then got up and even though his back was to you, you could imagine how hurt he looked.

“You won’t embarrass me”.

“I was at that work dinner last month and…I felt so stupid. Like I haven’t before. You know, when you work every day with people who can’t even spell the word encyclopedia, you do feel as smart as one. But then reality hit me. Everyone there was so smart. Like you. That’s the people you work with. And Rodri was chatting with all of them and talking about everything like he was one of them. While I was just asked about my gym routine and what I ate to keep my muscles so big”.

“I’m sorry they made you feel like that”, you said, slowly walking towards him to wrap your arms around his waist. “But just so you know, I would never date a doctor. They’re unbearable”.

You chuckled but he didn’t join you so you squeezed his waist to try and show him your love somehow. It was you who felt stupid then. Not knowing what to do to comfort your boyfriend.

“Rúben, do you want me to stay?”

“No, go to Madrid. Have fun. I won’t ruin your plans”.

“You’re more important than a trip. I can go to Madrid whenever”.

“No”, he turned to look at your face. “I’m stupid, ok? It’s a lot sometimes. And all the comments about Rodrid don’t help. All the stats about how shit we are without him. Those don’t help”.

“Well, whenever you feel like that, talk to me. So I can reassure you about whatever you need to be reassured about, ok?”

He nodded. It was him who needed to hold you tightly at that moment and you felt really happy when he did. And relieved. He wasn’t going anywhere and neither were you.

“Really, I can stay…”.

“No. Go on your trip. I’ll be waiting here for you. And buy me a gift while you’re there”.

“What do people buy in Madrid as souvenirs?”

“I don’t know but I’m sure Rodri will know”.

“Looking forward to that Atleti fridge magnet he’ll make me buy”, you laughed.

**

Your time in Madrid was great. The tour Rodri got ready for you was fantastic. But you missed Rúben. And worried about him. So you kept texting him photos of the places you visited and updating him.

-“You took me to get ice cream the moment we left the house so that's a point for you. 1-0”.

-“Oh wait, Rodri bought us churros. 1-1”.

-“Why are these churros so good? 🤤”

-"I'm buying a churro making machine. I'm having these for breakfast every day. Oh my God!"

-"Laura took me to a park to see turtles. Can we get a pet turtle? 🐢".

-"Also, that's a point for her. Not Rodri. Not such a perfect tour guide if he didn't know I wanted to see the turtles 🤷".

-"Laura filmed me trying to read the menu in Spanish. That video will never see the light of day but I'll let you know it exists and it's incredibly embarrassing".

Rúben was glued to his phone, waiting for the next text. And he sent some back to you, joking about things like how much better the weather was in Manchester.

But as much as he loved the texts, he was so happy when you were finally back.

"I want you to tell me everything you did in Madrid. Even if I've seen it already".

"Oh, get ready for all the anecdotes. I'm not shutting up about it anytime soon", you laughed and then picked up a bag from your suitcase. "They didn't have magnets…".

So you bought him an Atleti keychain.

"What do I want this for?"

"To piss João off when you see him?", you shrugged and made Rúben laugh. It was a good reason to keep it.

A few days later, City lost another match. This time against Arsenal, so it hurt even more. And the press were back to talking about how bad the team performs without Rodri.

Rúben was going back to Portugal after the match for international break, but you wanted to make sure he was fine before he got on the plane and called him.

"I'm not listening to any of it. Don't worry".

"Pinky promise?"

His chuckle made you relax a bit. "Pinky promise".

You stayed on the phone for a bit longer and then it was time for him to get on the plane.

"You know, Rúben. You never asked me which city I liked more. Madrid or Lisbon".

"Ok. Which one did you like more?".

"Lisbon. Do you wanna know why?"

"Sure. Why?"

"Because I was there with you".

[cultofdixon]

Trapped

Daryl Dixon • She/Her Pronouns • Terminus was a hell for everyone that experienced it. But you were the only one out of them all to have lived there and you saw EVERYTHING. Even lost a part of you to get you in line. That when the next community opened its doors, you were the last one adjusting • ANGST/SFW • TW: Canon Violence / Cannibals / Missing Appendage / Injuries / Scars / Anxiety Attacks / Claustrophobia / PTSD / Nightmares

Requested by: Anon

The explosion took all of their attentions away from what was about to happen. The two butchers behind the four kneeling men looked at Gareth for answers while he left in search of them.

“Should we continue?”

“I’m not sure—-hey” One of them got distracted leaving Rick’s window to be open but when he heard what’s next— “You’re not allowed in here. Where did you—-“ the gun fired making them all flinch and turn around quickly to find Y/N. Y/N…

The gun in hand was Rick’s, and it was handed to him after said retired sheriff broke loose taking out the second butcher as she took care of releasing the three still tied. Daryl didn’t hesitate to bring her into his embrace holding onto her for a short while relaxing every negative thought from the time apart. Glenn noticed her hands on Daryl’s back and quickly made the two part so that he could get a better look at the missing pinky and ringer finger of her right hand.

“How long have you been here?”

“Who the fuck did this to you?!”

“Y/N. What are we dealing—-“

“Cannibals. Fucking human eating human beings!” Y/N snaps handing Rick back his gun as he took her hand to see the damage himself. “I’m not gonna like what you’re plotting am I?”

“You know where our stuff is being held if you had my gun. We can find a lighter”

Y/N helped her group get their weapons back, along with anything else they might have taken. Resulting in the next actions being Daryl holding Y/N’s body still as Glenn held her hand for Rick to heat up his knife and pressed the heated material against the stubs where her fingers were to stop the bleeding and start the healing process.

“You know I’m a doctor right?”

“Would you do this in the green zone?”

“As a last resort” Bob states grabbing a left over bandana and wrapping it around their wound securely and temporarily. Until they find actual medical supplies. “What…did they do to your…?”

“You don’t wanna know” Y/N frowns as her words made Daryl tighten around her for a second before the small group had to retrieve the others and leave this shithole.

The reunions made the pain hurt less. But there was still something lingering there…that got triggered by the downhill spiral they all endured.

The cannibals finding and eating part of Bob

Bob dying

Finding out Eugene was useless

Finding out Beth was alive…but dead when reunited

Tyreese dying

Starving themselves

Almost dying to a herd trapped in a barn

Then the stranger that promises a safe haven, and going to such with hesitation. Y/N kept to herself as the group followed the stranger named Aaron and his partner Eric. She found herself lingering to the back watching the place come to view with more guards, another fence, and most likely another set of rules with harsh consequences. At least that’s the state of mind she’s going in with.

“Hey…come on” Maggie pulls her out of her thoughts wrapping her arm around her and walking inside the place with Y/N. “We’ve got yea. I don’t think anything bad will happen here…”

“And if it does?”

“You’ve got us” Sasha reassures joining the two as they made their way into Alexandria.

Daryl kept his attention on Y/N the entire time since they first entered Alexandria. She has Sasha and Maggie currently but it’s always nice to have another set of eyes as long as he doesn’t stare for too long. He was making sure nothing overwhelmed her or triggered her because she hasn’t sit still since arriving.

“Y/N is staying in the first floor bedroom” Carol informs Daryl who didn’t want to be inside the homes for too long in case anything happened. But he also wanted to make sure Y/N stayed in one place to avoid the worrying of where she’s at. “The surgeon here patched up her hand, what Rick and you guys did was a bit much but he would’ve done the same if he were you”

“The son of a bitch doesn’t look like he’s stepped out of this place since the beginning”

“Regardless. Y/N hasn’t slept since the fall of the prison and if you’re not leaving the porch to yknow take a much needed shower or to scowl at one of the pretty boys…if anything happens, Y/N will need you.”

Daryl knew this already, but Carol knew a part of him was still hurting. Blaming himself for Beth’s death. Beating himself up for not finding Y/N and having her suffer the horrors of that place the longest. He wasn’t going to leave his spot unless something bad happened.

Y/N sat up in her bed to be met with a dark room, only light was on her. She felt her fingers seeing that they were there, until a hand came into view grabbing her wrist and yanking her forward.

The woman fell out of bed on her hands and knees as the light only followed her. She gasps to the sudden pain returning to her ribs as she fell through the floor landing straight on her side.

As the prison fills into the world surrounding Y/N, she looks at her person finding the damage from the fall of the prison littered on her body. Weakness from recovering from being sick…and the bruised ribs from an explosion knocking her off the second floor to the first in A block.

Need to get out

Need to get out

Need to get…

Y/N found herself sitting up in restraints in a cold building. Felt like a freezer of a warehouse. She scans around the once dark again room as footsteps echoed in the darkness. Revealing Gareth who held a nutcracker behind his back.

“You stumbled in our community, and killed one of our own”

She couldn’t speak.

“You’ll suffer the consequences…and then work for me. Unless you’d want to lose another finger” Gareth smirks as Y/N suddenly screams in pain to find one of her fingers missing. “Just. Cooperate…and you can live here.”

Suddenly Y/N was on her back gripping onto the set of hands gripping her throat staring up at one of the butchers who had enough of her attitude. Gareth appears beside him watching the light in her face but right before she passed out, he made the man let go.

“Another”

The sudden screaming caught Daryl off guard as he stops talking to Glenn about the asshole sons of Deanna to rush into the home. Glenn of course followed in case something worse was happening but as he joined the scene watching Daryl get swatted away from Y/N’s fetal position in the corner of the room. He quickly grabbed the back of Daryl’s vest pulling him away causing a bit of a fight.

“The hell are you doing?!”

“She’s still having the nightmare” Glenn points out the fact that she’s never opened her eyes since he arrived and given when Daryl first entered she didn’t know instantly that it was him. “You need to be more careful”

“Right…Fuck” Daryl frowns taking it slow and approaching Y/N’s curled position grabbing the blanket off the bed.

“It’s okay. Y/N…you’re not where you’re at” Glenn whispers approaching along with the archer in case she retaliated. “You are in a house…that you share with Carol…and Daryl…in the new community. That is scary…and full of new people…”

“But we’re here…” Daryl states watching her body relax slowly. “You ain’t alone like back at Terminus……we reunited. We’re safe. You are safe”

The two stopped when her body relaxed enough for Daryl to bring the blanket around her without any freak out. When she woke she retracted a bit making Daryl back off and Glenn shoot out reassurance until she relaxed again but conscious.

“You had a nightmare”

“That triggered sleepwalking or I don’t know what you’d call being asleep but acting the nightmare.” Glenn sat on the bed as Y/N curled up with the blanket around her with Daryl keeping his hands on her knees. “Uhm. I know the timing is terrible but what happened in the nightmare?”

“Felt more like a night terror…but uh…I don’t really want to talk about it”

“That’s fine. Just know you’ve got us whenever you’re ready to talk about it” Glenn got up from the bed. “Do you want anything before Daryl can—-“

“I’m okay…thank you Glenn”

Once he left, Daryl got up from the floor to help Y/N off the ground. He directs her back to bed sitting on the edge once she got in entirely covering herself more in the blanket.

“Imma ask, if yea need anything before I grab assumptions”

“…my hand hurts”

“Pain meds it is” Daryl pats her knee getting up to grab what she’ll need leaving her alone for a moment.

Y/N brought her knees to her chest covering her entire person with the blanket Daryl wrapped around her shoulders earlier. She wanted to make herself small for just a second to find some sense of calm…even when her heart was still racing like it did when she was in Terminus.

The night of the party came and Daryl wasn’t going to go. Because he hates that shit and wants to be there for Y/N, who hasn’t left her room since receiving it. He kept to the porch as he smoked to clear his mind of the mental toll she could be experiencing when Aaron walked by.

“Not going to the party?”

“Nah, I’ve got shit to take care of”

Aaron nods thinking about his next response before just going for it. “Want some dinner? I wasn’t gonna go because of Eric so we’re staying in”

“I uh…” Daryl turned toward the house expecting Y/N’s bubbly self to come out but that was taken from everybody. “Y/N hasn’t left the house and—“

“You don’t wanna leave your partner. I get it” Aaron smiles. “But if you come by. For just. 15 minutes. You can eat…grab a plate for her” he offers and left on that note.

Fifteen minutes…

And he didn’t have to worry about it one bit. Daryl came back actually past fifteen minutes to find Y/N in the kitchen in fresh clothes and grabbing a glass of water. He joins her at the kitchen island setting down the bowl of spaghetti he brought for her from Aaron’s.

“The party?”

“Nah. Wouldn’t go to that shit without yea. Just went to Aaron’s for dinner” Daryl watches her inspect it. “I had two plates. It ain’t poisoned.”

“Thank you for bringing me dinner…” Her smile returns to her as it always brought a sense of warmth to Daryl.

Daryl brought himself beside her while she ate her dinner in the comforts of his presence. Y/N finishes her dinner and put the bowl in the sink to wash later…feeling Daryl come up behind her wrapping his arms around her torso resting his chin on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry you were stuck there…”

“You don’t have to apologize, Dar…we’re safe now” Y/N rubs his forearm gently. “Right?”

“M’not leavin’ anymore. You’re stuck with me now” Daryl smiles listening to her laugh that he missed so much.

“Good”

[thedeviltohisangel]

“Are you actually blushing?” “No! Shut up.” & “awww did I flustered you?” For Cass/Bucky please

BLUSHING PROMPT ERA

when you all aren't requesting pow camp angst, you all want more of cass and the egan family. my gift to my few fluff lovers.

Penelope's wails had quieted to tired little whimpers as John paced around the backyard of his childhood home. Her and her brother had been perfectly well behaved on the flight from Virginia to Wisconsin but while Gale had fallen asleep during his bedtime bottle, Penny had decided to test the capacity of her lungs in the midwestern air.

"It's okay, my sweet girl. I know you've had a long day. You must be so tired," John cooed to his baby daughter as he bounced her gently. Her teary eyes were looking up at the stars as he pressed gentle kisses to the side of her head. He hoped Cass had fallen asleep. They both had been running on empty since they became parents three months ago.

"Coming out here always use to work when you were as little as her." John turned to see his mother standing in the doorway to the back of the house, watching her son and granddaughter with a smile on her face.

"Did she wake you? I'm sorry, ma, I tried to get her out here as quick as I could." His mother shook her head and reached for her granddaughter, John passing her off and collapsing into a lawn chair as she took over the calming, rocking movements he had been trying for what felt like hours.

Penelope looked at her grandmother with curiosity and slowly went silent as she grew comfortable in her arms. "How come you and my wife can just look at them and they stop crying but they make me work for it all night?"

"Maternal instinct, Johnny. Cassandra seems to be adjusting to motherhood quite well." John nodded as he took the sleeping baby back from his mother and held her against his chest.

"She's a natural. Barely blinked when the doctors said there was another one right behind Penny." John had been in the hallway raging at the medical staff that was trying to keep him from seeing his wife. His mother didn't need to know that part.

"And you? I remember that one summer you helped with a baseball team, you were so good with them."

"I think I'm getting the hang of it. The half of them they get from me is causing us the most problems but that is to be expected." His mother laughed and he let it wrap around him like a hug. "I never thought about a future that looked like this until I fell in love with her." John kissed the top of his daughter's head and pressed his finger into her little palm that was resting against his chest, her fingers curling around his and his heart skipping a beat.

"I'm glad. I was worried after the last time you were here." His mother hadn't mentioned their time in Wisconsin when she had come with his sisters to South Carolina for the wedding but that doesn't mean she hadn't thought about it.

"That was...we were in a dark place. I didn't mean for it to boil over here but I saw that photo and got that letter and..." He hugged his daughter tighter. He had stormed out of his parents house that night without his wedding band. With the intent of helping Cass book a one way trip to South Carolina to be rid of him and their marriage and the mess he was causing in her life. Had said a million things he regretted and had drank himself to oblivion at the local bar over the idea that he had finally fucked up enough to lose her.

"But now you've got these little blessings. And that absolutely wonderful little dog, John, he really is so handsome." Butter was probably on his half of the bed upstairs as they spoke, sleeping like a rock in Cass' arms. John hadn't even tried to fight bringing him on the trip and hadn't looked at the final cost of bringing a dog on the airplane. His wife assured him it was pennies for the joy it would bring her and the kids to have him tag along.

"Butter? He's trying to replace me."

"Well, I'm sure Cassandra appreciates that he doesn't talk back." John looked up at the sky and prayed for strength. Why did all the women in his life have to be against him?

-

"Oh, Cass, he's such a handsome little devil just look at him!" Gale giggled as one of his aunt's kissed his cheeks and tickled at his sides. "How on earth did he come from someone like my brother?"

"Your brother is plenty handsome," Cass offered with a smile as she adjusted Penny in her lap, the little girl chewing on the foot of one of the stuffed animals she had just been gifted.

"Don't tell me he makes you do all the work during the making part."

"Yeah, John, your wife deserves to be lavished more often than you do!" his other sister chimed in. He poked his head out from where he was preparing bottles in the kitchen.

"You have no clue how often I lavish my wife!"

"She could always use more." Butter barked in agreement.

"Are you actually blushing?" John asked with a smirk as he offered Cass one bottle and his sister the other.

"No! Shut up." It wasn't that Cass was some kind of prude when it came to talking about her sex life with John. She just didn't want his mother overhearing any conversations of baby making and lavishing.

"Did I fluster you, baby?" John nuzzled his nose into her neck to make her laugh as she lovingly looked on at Penelope eating her second breakfast.

"Just got me thinking about lavishing now is all."

"Yeah? You in need of some?" John said, his voice dropping an octave. She bit her bottom lip and nodded, leaning in to nip at his lips. "Fuck. Yeah, I think you need some real bad, baby."

He was never happier to have his sisters around to baby sit than he was on his knees in the backseat of his old car, his wife's legs over his shoulders and his face buried under her skirt.

[justagalwhowrites]

Lavender - Ch. 45

You, Joel and Ellie make your way into Salt Lake City. A continuation of Lavender Ch. 1-44 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Mild canon-typical violence. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI, 18+ only.

Length: 5.4K

“I’m just realizing,” you said as you walked alongside Joel and Ellie. “I was not very well traveled before the outbreak.” 

“You’d made it a few places,” Joel frowned a little. “Got out of your hometown and shit, more than you can say for most people…” 

Ellie frowned, too. 

“Wait,” she said. “Most people would really just… stay in one place? Even when they could leave?” 

“Oh yeah,” Joel said. “Most people just stuck where they were. I moved to a different town from where I was born but same state. Doc made it a lot further than me.” 

You shrugged. 

“Just for college,” you said. “The point is, this is the furthest west that I’ve ever been. How strange is that? That it took me until the end of the world to get to this side of the country…” 

“But you had planes!” Ellie gaped at you both. “You could go in the sky and you just didn’t? What the fuck, man?” 

You and Joel both laughed at that. 

It had been one of Ellie’s better days. She was rabidly curious, asking about a million questions as you closed in on Salt Lake City. Judging by the mile markers, you only had one more night of sleeping on the road before you made it to the Fireflies’ facility - assuming this one wasn’t abandoned too, anyway - and it had been a really good last day on the road. 

The thought was strangely bittersweet, a sense of finality to your looming arrival in the city. You wanted to get Ellie to the Fireflies. You wanted to start work on a cure. It had been so long since you’d been in a lab now, part of you was itching to get back into it. Hell, getting back to doing anything but the minimum when it came to medicine sounded incredible. 

But you didn’t want to change anything about your time with Joel and Ellie. You’d even be fine living on the road forever if it meant the three of you got to be together all the time. The Firefly compound was an unknown. You weren’t sure if they would LET you stay together - though you doubted Joel would let them separate you. But if their doctors wanted to keep Ellie in a contained environment for a while to make sure she didn’t come down with anything while they drew samples, you weren’t going to push back on them. You’d come too far to quibble over something so small. But you still dreaded it, not being with them all the time. 

It reminded you a little of the feeling in your stomach when you first started adjusting to the QZ with Andrew. You’d become so used to functioning with him glued to your side, constantly watching each other’s backs for danger and killing to keep the other alive, even a room’s distance was disorienting and anxiety inducing. The makeshift medical camp was a rude awakening when you’d arrived, that much you knew even though your memories of it were vague at best. You remembered arriving to the QZ, your arms firmly around Andrew’s waist and his arm around your shoulders, clutching onto each other. You were covered in blood, your shotgun dangling from your arm. They’d had to pry you apart to examine you both and it was like someone was ripping away a part of your body. You’d tried to ease yourselves into some separation after that. Different rooms for a bit, a few hours in different buildings after that. It took months to sleep apart. 

You didn’t think it would be that extreme this time. You knew better what to expect, for one. For another, you’d all been living with the damage dealt by surviving the end of the world. Ellie had been born into it. Who Joel was now was forged in it. You, it seemed, had just melted into it, who you were finding little paths through the chaos like water through cracks in cement. You would all get through this differently, but you could get through it. That you knew. 

It also helped that Jackson was waiting on the other side. You weren’t sure how long it would take to get there, but you’d get there. There was a house with a room that Ellie could make her own - you’d paint her a solar system in a corner and constellations on the ceiling. There was a kitchen where you could make the cookies you’d been baking for so long you had the recipe memorized. There was a porch where Joel could play guitar. There were kids Ellie’s age she could meet and laugh with and maybe fall in love with the way she deserved to. There were people to play cards with and drink with and have inside jokes with. There was life there, life that was worth living outside of just the three of you. 

You just had to get there. That’s all. 

“Flying wasn’t that special, Gremlin,” you said smiling a little. “It was expensive and they tried to cram in as many people as possible so they made as much money as they possibly could. And you had to get to the airport hours early so they could search all your stuff… Really, it was a hassle.” 

“Is that why people didn’t do it?” She frowned. “Go places, I mean.” 

“Travel cost a lot of money,” Joel said. “More than most people had just lyin’ around. Stayin’ home was a lot easier and a lot cheaper.” 

Ellie scrunched her face. 

“Everyone acts like before was so fucking great but a lot of it sounds shitty,” she said. “Why make it so not everyone can do the cool shit? That’s dumb.” 

“I agree,” you smiled a little. 

“I hope it’s better this time,” she kicked a piece of asphalt. “Once there’s a cure, I mean. Like I know it’ll take a while and shit, they’re going to have to make the thing and then give it to everyone and whatever but I hope they don’t keep the shitty stuff from before.” 

Joel looked skeptical so you jumped in before he had a chance to. 

“We’ve never had a chance to kind of reset humanity before,” you said. “We might be able to make things way better than they ever were before. Who knows.” 

“That’d be cool,” she nodded. “Then at least it’s not like all this shit was for nothing, you know?  Like… yeah, it was all really fucked up for a while and people did really messed up things to each other but in the end, we did something good with it. You know?” 

“Yeah,” you smiled at her a bit. “I do.” 

The three of you called it a day about 15 miles from Salt Lake City. You knew if you kept walking for a bit that you’d probably find a house to stay in for the night but Joel seemed to have the same mindset as you. One more night, the three of you, camped out on the road. You’d be with the Fireflies tomorrow night, in a place with a roof and beds and doors, but the sky was clear and the weather was - relatively - warm. One last night under the sky, just the three of you, before the world changed. 

Joel built a fire and Ellie shot a rabbit. You got the last of the herbs you’d grabbed from Bill and Frank’s to dress the animal up a bit, making it feel like something special. You played poker around the fire, Ellie cleaning out both you and Joel. 

“If Vegas is ever a thing again, you need to go,” you said as you got the cards picked up. “You’d ruin the casinos’ day.” 

“Should start a poker night in Jackson,” Joel said. “She’d hustle half the damn town before anyone got wise….” 

You convinced Joel to sleep through the night and let you and Ellie split the watch - something you were counting as a win. He’d been pushing himself too hard since you’d left the cabin. It had taken you just over a week to get this far and he’d pulled two all night watches in that time and covered at least half of all the others.  You weren’t sure if it was paranoia, if it was fulfilling some need to look out for the two of you until he physically couldn’t do it anymore, if he had a bad feeling and he was doing everything he could to defend against the source of it. He wasn’t talking to you about it so you were just trying to keep an eye on him the best you could. He was more fragile than he looked, you knew. You’d wait until you were safely with the Fireflies and had some time alone before you really tried to get anything out of him. 

But letting you and Ellie handle the watches without him was a change. You hoped it meant he was doing better, that he was starting to feel like he could relax. You pressed yourself against his front as he headed to his sleeping bag for the night, reaching up to scratch your fingers through his beard before tugging his lips to yours. His arms slug around your waist and he pulled you close and you smiled against his lips. 

“What’s that for?” He asked when you pulled away eventually. 

You shrugged. 

“Just love you is all,” you said. 

“Love you too,” he kissed your forehead. “Wake me up the second you think somethin’ might be wrong, got it?” 

“I promise I won’t try to handle a damn thing all on my own,” you rolled your eyes a bit and he lay down beside the fire to sleep. 

The watch was quiet and still, nothing raising any alarms for you, even when you took the short walks around the perimeter of your little camp. It was pushing 4 a.m. when Ellie started jerking in her sleeping bag. You frowned, watching her for a moment to see if it passed. It didn’t, her thrashing getting worse as she whimpered. You knelt beside her and set the rifle out of reach before you gently touched her arm. 

“Ellie,” you said quietly, calmly. “You’re OK Baby Girl, you’re OK…” 

She jerked awake and shot upright, throwing your hand sharply away. She was panting and gasping for breath, her eyes wide and glistening with tears in the light of the moon and the dying fire. She looked at you for a moment before it was like something in her cracked and she choked out a sob, her head falling onto your shoulder. 

“Oh, sweetheart,” you said softly, putting your arms around her and tucking her head beneath your own. “You’re OK, I’ve got you. You’re OK…” 

“It felt so real,” she hiccuped into your neck. “I thought…” 

“It’s OK,” you said when she trailed off. “You’re OK, I’ve got you. You’re safe. We’ve got you, not going to let anything happen to you, OK? You’re safe.” 

She nodded but tucked herself tighter against you. You just held onto her, rocking her as her sobs faded. 

“Want to talk about it?” You asked when her breathing had returned to a normal pace and it felt like her tears were no longer soaking your shirt. “It might help. I’m here for you, you can tell me anything. I’ll even keep it from Joel if you really want…” 

She pulled back from you a little, looking you in the eyes. 

“Yeah?” She sniffed. “Because I know it’ll just hurt him and….” She sighed heavily. “I really don’t want to hurt him.” 

“He’d much rather you talk to him than hold onto all that hurt yourself, Baby Girl,” you tucked some of the hair that had escaped her ponytail behind her ear. “But I don’t have to tell him if you don’t want me to.” 

She looked over at Joel who was snoring lightly, his deaf ear facing up as he lay on his side. 

“You could bring a marching band through here right now and I doubt he’d hear,” you smiled a little at her. “It’s OK. What’s bothering you?” 

Ellie’s eyes searched yours for a moment before she took a deep breath, looked down at her hands and began. 

“Back at Silver Lake. After…” she said, taking another shuddering breath. “After they took you away, David… He tried talking to me, saying shit about how he thought I was dangerous. Said he wanted to fuckin’ lead with me, that I had… that I had a ‘violent heart.’” 

She put the last two words in air quotes, all but spitting them out. You took her face in your hand and stroked her cheekbone with your thumb. She sniffed. 

“He said he’d call off the hunt for Joel and let you go if I cooperated with him and I thought about it…” 

“Oh honey,” you touched your forehead to hers as she stared at her lap. “We aren’t your responsibility…” 

She nodded a little and you sat back from her a little. 

“I knew you’d say something like that,” she laughed once, darkly. “Knew Joel’d be pissed that I even considered it… So I broke David’s fucking finger instead.” 

You laughed once and smiled a little. 

“Good girl,” you said. She looked a little proud of that. 

“They didn’t like that so…” she took another shaky breath and stiffened a bit, her small hands clenching into fists. “They tried to kill me, like they were going to eat me… I bit David, told him I was infected, used my scar…” 

“That was so smart, Baby Girl,” you said when she felt quiet. “You did so damn good…” 

“He didn’t really believe me,” she shrugged. “Not after a minute. I… I killed the man he was with and ran and he followed me and… Doc, he…” 

She swallowed a sob and your hand slid from her face to the back of her neck, holding her gently. 

“It’s OK sweetheart,” you said softly. “You’re OK…” 

“He tried…” she choked on the words for a moment. “He said he was going to keep me, that he liked the fighting…” 

“Oh honey,” you were trying not to cry for her, for this girl you should have been there to protect and instead you let them take you away from her. 

“I killed him,” she sniffed, meeting your eyes for the first time since she’d started talking. “Before he could do anything, I… I more than killed him. He didn’t have a face anymore and it… I…” 

You tugged her against you and she pressed her face into your shoulder as you rocked her gently, running one hand up and down her back. 

“You’re OK now,” you said softly as you held onto her. “You’re safe. It’s OK…” 

She cried there for a minute before she pulled back from you again. You held her face in your hand, drying her tears with your thumb. 

“None of that is your fault, OK?” You said gently. “You did what you had to do - what they MADE you do - to protect yourself. There was nothing you could have done. It was always up to them. They were monsters and you did what you have to do to monsters and that’s OK.” 

She nodded and wiped her face with her shirtsleeves. 

“Doc?” She said, her voice wet. 

“Yes, Baby Girl?” 

“What if…” her voice broke for a moment. “What if part of me… liked it? Liked hurting him? Because… I…” 

She trailed off but kept her eyes on you, wide and pleading. 

“That’s OK,” you said quietly. “It’s OK if protecting yourself made you feel good. That’s OK. It doesn’t make you a bad person because you liked hurting an actual bad person who deserved whatever you did to them and more. OK?” 

She sniffed and nodded and she leaned forward, against you. 

“I don’t want to do that again,” she sniffed. “I really fucking don’t…” 

“I know,” you said softly, holding her close. “I’m so sorry you had to do it then. We’re going to make sure you don’t need to do it again. We’re going to take care of you, we’re going to protect you. We won’t let anything happen to you.” 

She sniffed and nodded and you held her for a while longer. 

“How are you feeling?” You asked quietly eventually. “Any better now that you’ve talked about it?” 

“A little, I think,” she sniffed and straightened. “What time is it? Time to switch watch?” 

“Not yet,” you lied with a soft smile. “Go back to sleep for a bit, OK?” 

She nodded and lay down, curling in on herself a bit. You stayed close to her for a bit, waiting for the cadence of her breaths to shift to sleep. You watched her like that, her face peaceful and relaxed. 

You should have been there to protect her. Should have been there to make sure no one came close to touching her. Should have made sure she didn’t need to kill anybody. That had been why you’d wanted to come with her to begin with, to protect her from what you knew was out here in the way you hadn’t been able to protect Jessica all those years before. Ellie was alive but you hadn’t kept her safe, not really. The failure of it sank through your chest and into your stomach like lead. You hadn’t done your job and it was Ellie who would need to suffer the consequences. 

You let Ellie and Joel rest, leaning back against a tree, watching them both. They were so much more fragile than either of them would admit to being, both of them hurting from the worst things that life could do to a person while trying so hard to be strong. It threatened to swallow them. You weren’t great with a gun or a knife, you weren’t good at hurting and killing and all the things the apocalypse seemed to demand of survivors. But you were good at taking care of people, at helping them. You could take care of them in the ways they needed, help them find their way back to the versions of themselves that were buried deep under the rubble of this life. You could spend your existence doing that, you thought, and it would be enough for a full life. Loving them through it all would be enough.

*** 

If Ellie had been more herself, Joel would have started the day by chewing you out. You were still awake when the sun came up, clearly tired but keeping your eyes open, on guard. 

But Ellie was distant and detached when she woke up a few minutes later, only answering questions with a shrug and staying close to your side. 

“You gonna tell me what happened last night?” He asked, voice low, when Ellie stepped away for a bathroom break. You were on the edge of the city now, so close to your final destination. It settled like a stone in his stomach, the bile of uncertainty and change setting him on edge.

“Not my thing to tell,” you smiled a little sadly at him. “But I’ve got it covered. It’s OK.” 

“Don’t like you stayin’ up all night,” he grumbled. “Pushin’ yourself too hard…” 

“But it’s fine when you do it?” You asked, brows raised. 

“My reaction time with a gun when I’m half asleep is better than yours when you’re wide awake,” he said flatly. 

“Well I didn’t need the gun so it’s a moot point,” you replied, a little smug. “But pick a fight with me about it later, when we’re in for the night. Ellie…” 

He nodded once. It was a day where the kid needed extra care and attention. He still wasn’t sure what caused it but he saw the signs of it. You and Joel hadn’t really talked about it but you both saw it happening. You’d trade off trying to engage with her, trying to make sure she wasn’t closing herself off too much, trying to get her to eat something and drink enough water. It gave Joel a new appreciation for what Tommy must have done for him in the early days of the outbreak, just after he lost Sarah. He was only alive because of your voice in his head and his brother’s kindness. 

“Here we go,” Joel said, coming out of a camper he’d been rummaging through for supplies. “We can play this tonight. Want to kick my ass at something besides poker, this is it…” 

He held up a copy of Boggle. Ellie just kind of nodded. 

“Kicking your ass is fun,” you said, looking at her as you said it. “And I bet we could get him to make things interesting…” 

That at least caught her attention and she raised her eyebrows at you. 

“I learned the other day that he’s willing to put an a-cappella performance of a song on the line,” you said. “We could experience a live, one night only, Joel Miller musical event…” 

Ellie smiled a little at that. 

“I’ll let you bet that,” Joel said, just happy to get some sign of life out of the girl. He’d be willing to be a lot to make that happen. “Gonna have to put something good on the line yourselves though, big risk for me…” 

“First choice on canned goods for a week?” You asked. 

“I’ll take that,” Joel said, glancing down at Ellie as the three of you continued on. Her smile had faded already. He shared a look with you, the shadows of Salt Lake City looming over you. 

“Well there’s a tall building there…” Joel said, looking up at it, trying to gauge its structural integrity. 

“So we’re going to cut through that building there, go up the tall one and take a look around?” Ellie said, voice flat. 

“Well, actually,” Joel said. “I found some dynamite back there. Figured we blast our way through and then…” 

“Shit, really?” She looked up at him. 

“No,” he smiled a little. “We’re gonna do what you said. But my way would’ve been fun, right?” 

“Yeah,” she smiled a little back. It didn’t reach her eyes. 

Joel led the way through the building, keeping an eye out for some sign of humanity - or infected. But there wasn’t much of anything. 

“Didn’t realize it was this bad out west,” you said as you picked your way through the rubble of the structure. “I know I had no reason to but I always kind of thought the east coast got the worst of it…” 

“Dallas didn’t fair well, either,” Joel said. “Didn’t stay there long, that’s for damn sure, but half the fuckin’ city was a crater. Texas Stadium was in one piece, they were tryin’ to set up somethin’ there when we cut through but half the buildings were gone.” 

“I wonder what other countries did,” you said. “If they did the same things we did or if they did something different and if they did any better in the long run…” 

Joel spotted a ladder on a ledge and a possible way up and through. 

“Hey, Ellie,” he said, distracting her from her tracing patterns in the dust with the toe of her shoe. She looked up. “Think that might be the route. If I give you a boost, can you get that ladder down here for us?” 

“Yeah,” she nodded with a tight smile, coming over to him. “Boost away.” 

She climbed up him, stepping off his leg to his hands to his shoulders as she clambered up. She started lowering the ladder down when something got her attention. 

“Oh wow…” 

She dropped the ladder and it fell with a clatter to the ground, you jumping forward to try to catch it before it hit Joel. You missed. 

“Jesus, Ellie!” He called after her, scrambling for the ladder. You backed up, looking up to the space above with a frown. 

“Can’t see her,” you said as he got the ladder set. 

“Better not be gettin’ herself killed,” he muttered, rushing up the ladder with you close behind. 

“Guys, come on!” She yelled as Joel pulled you up the rest of the way. You both looked at each other for a moment. This was easily the most excited you’d heard her since Silver Lake. You weren’t about to argue. “Hurry! We’re gonna fuckin’ miss it!” 

You and Joel both ran after the sound of her voice and found her standing at the edge of the broken side of the building, a giraffe standing in front of her, watching her with almost as much curiosity as she was watching it. 

“Oh shit,” you breathed, a wide smile spreading over your face. 

“Don’t scare it!” Ellie looked over her shoulder to the two of you. 

“We’re not,” Joel said, slowly and cautiously breaking off some greenery that had started taking over the dilapidated building. He held it out to Ellie and she took it. “Go slow…” 

She smiled and held the twig out. Joel broke off another one for you and you took it, watching as the animal wrapped its tongue around Ellie’s leaves. 

“Woah!” She looked at you. “You see that?” 

“Yeah,” you smiled, sounding oddly choked up. “Their tongues can be almost 2 feet long, they use them for reaching high up leaves…” 

Joel looked at you and you shrugged. 

“Elizabeth was learning about giraffes when we left,” you said. “She was telling me all about them. She thought the tongues were particularly cool…” 

“Because they are,” Ellie said, voice full of wonder. “Hey there!” 

The giraffe apparently decided she had enough and started off, Ellie following along the edge of the building, you and Joel trailing behind her until she stopped at another gaping hole in the structure. Giraffes roamed the grounds below, long necks bobbing as they walked. 

“So cool,” She breathed, smiling. It reached her eyes this time. “Can’t believe people wouldn’t travel just to have a chance at seeing shit like this…” 

Joel looked out over the city, spotting what he thought would be a good route to try for the hospital and just watching Ellie and you enjoy the giraffes. You stayed up there until they were all gone, the ground below just grass now. 

“C’mon,” Joel said. “Should keep movin’.” 

Ellie kept the glow after the giraffes for a bit, but it was easy to see it start to fade. The wonder and joy couldn’t stay forever, not in a world like this one, not in a place like this. 

But it could in Jackson. If it could stick around anywhere, it was there. 

“You know,” he said as the three of you walked. “We tried, the three of us. We really tried to find the Fireflies, get you this far…” 

“Yeah,” Ellie nodded. 

“Found the first spot without their help,” he continued. “But they’d left. Lookin’ for this one now and not seein’ much of a sign of ‘em…” 

Ellie shrugged. 

“Probably just trying to hid from raiders or FEDRA or some shit,” she said. “That’s what we do.” 

“Yeah, sure,” Joel nodded. “But…” 

Ellie stopped walking and turned to face him. 

“But what?” 

“Baby Girl,” Joel looked at her, this girl who had - in the span of just a few months - become as central to his being as you were. He sighed. “You’ve done so much. You don’t need to do any more. We can just turn around, go back to Jackson. We can do it right now…” 

“And do what?” She frowned. 

“Just live,” you said. “You don’t have to do anything else but that, sweetheart. I promise, you don’t. You don’t owe the world a damn thing…” 

“But everything we’ve done,” she said. “Everything I’ve done… It has to mean something, right? It has to be for a reason. It can’t… It can’t all be for nothing.” 

“It kept you alive,” you said. “That’s all it’s ever been about…” 

“I’ve been given this… thing,” she said. “I’m special, right Doc? No one else is out there like me?” 

“That I know of,” you nodded. “Yeah. But that’s true even if you weren’t immune, kiddo…” 

“I can’t not use it,” she shook her head. “I mean, Doc, you’ve always said we’re here to love people. How am I supposed to do that if I could save the world and I just… don’t?” 

“It’s not supposed to be at the expense of yourself, Baby Girl,” you said gently. “We don’t know what’s waiting for us there but…” 

“But we should find out,” she said. “If I can save people… I want to. I’m special for a reason, right? It has to be for a reason, all of this has to be for a reason.” 

She turned to keep walking and the desperation spread through Joel so fast he spoke without fully thinking. 

“I was the one who missed.” 

Ellie froze before turning around, looking at him. He took a deep breath but kept going. 

“No one shot at me ‘cept me,” he said. “I was the one who missed.” 

You stepped closer to him and slipped your hand into his. 

“What…” Ellie’s voice trailed off. 

“Sarah died,” he said and he looked at you. “Thought she was gone, too….” He looked back at Ellie. “Didn’t seem worth it. I wanted to be done. I was sure, never been more sure of anything in my damn life so I…” 

He took a deep breath. 

“I flinched,” he said. “Part of me… part of me knew I’d find her again…” He gave your hand a squeeze. “But that wasn’t enough. Not for a long time… Anyway, what I’m tryin’ to tell you…” 

“I know what you’re trying to tell me,” she said, giving him a tight smile. “So time really does heal all wounds?” 

“Wasn’t time that did it,” he said. “Baby Girl, you’re enough all on your own, immune or no. You don’t need to do another damn thing, you just keep livin’ and that’s enough.” 

She watched him for a moment. 

“I’m really glad that didn’t work out, Joel,” she said quietly. “But we should keep going.” 

He nodded slowly and Ellie turned to head further into the city. You pressed a kiss to the scar at his temple and he took a deep, shaky breath. 

“If we haven’t found ‘em by tomorrow…” he said. 

“I know,” you said softly. 

The two of you caught up with her quickly. 

“I think this calls for some shitty puns,” Joel said. 

“Excellent puns, you mean,” you corrected him. 

“You asked for it,” Ellie smiled, slinging her backpack around to her front and grabbing the book out. 

“Oh this is good,” she looked at the two of you. “People are making apocalypse jokes like there’s no tomorrow!” 

Joel smiled and shook his head and you snorted. 

“Not too soon?” She asked, turning the page. 

“That’s just topical,” Joel said. 

“I think I need a new line of work,” you said, looking at Ellie. “And making mirrors is something I could really see myself doing…” 

“Ohhhh,” she groaned. “That one’s so bad!” 

“Is it?” You crinkled your nose. 

“Here’s one,” Ellie said. “One of my favorites, you’ll have to guess why… Moon rocks taste better than Earth rocks. Know why?” 

“Why?” Joel asked. 

“Because they’re meteor!” 

“No,” Joel shook his head as Ellie laughed. “Uh-uh, that one’s bad…” 

“That one’s perfect!” She replied. “It’s a pun and it’s about space, you literally cannot get better than that.” 

“That’s a three of 10,” Joel said. “And that’s bein’ generous.” 

“What!” She shook her head. “No way, at least a six, probably an eight….” 

Joel only heard the canister hit the ground because he turned his head to look at you, the clatter of the metal on the pavement making him pause. 

“What…” you began but Joel moved fast, grabbing your arm and Ellie’s and throwing you both behind him just as the canister exploded. 

The last thing he heard was you screaming his name before he passed out. 

A/N: Yup. We're here. We're too this point.

Canon is going to diverge next chapter as we close in on the end of this story but get ready for *drumroll* FERAL JOEL!

Because next chapter is all Feral Joel all the time.

And we love that for us.

There is a taglist if you'd like to be added BUT we're really closing in on the end here. I think this story will be wrapped by the end of the month. I will add you if you'd like, however!

Thank you for being here and sticking with this story! I've loved every second of this adventure with you. Love you!!

Taglist: @paleidiot@ayamenimthiriel@ginger-swag-rapunzel@drewharrisonwriter@flugazi @pedropascalsbbg@taoyuji@starstruckmusiciansartghost@splendsay@bigboiseason123@jpbplvr @ashleyandring @mrsyixingunicorn10@sloanexx@ninaminaromina @lady-bellyn @hufflepuffriver @sarap-77 @storyarcscribe @mellymbee @jasminedragoon @lemonmeli @reds-ramblings@arizonadaydreamer@mumma-moonchild@blackroseguzzi@candypeaches16@kittenlittle24@wrappedinfiction@oatmeaiboy@pedritosdarling@winchestergypsy90@imnotdatboii @lalalalemonade11 @maknimuk1@mrsdarcyinlovewithbuckybarnes@pedrosaidsheispunk@commanderawkward@n7cje@elliesgirlll@tsunamistorm123@spookyxsam@leeeesahhh @anoverwhelmingdin @untamedheart81 @pedropascalfan221 @pedr0swh0r3 @pedrobae@fifia-writes@fatima-marisa @acf2023 @1soff@encephalitiskat @ashleymsnodgrass @karlinspace

[fatuismooches]

(Extending the Dottore sugar tax)

That one fatui chef who is half-decent in confectionery (specialises in rations/large batches of easy food): Becomes the saviour of half the platoon after learning how to make Sumerian desserts

But... one day Dottore has to find out, a lucky streak never lasts with him around, and he finds out in the worst way.

It happened during a meeting with Pantalone, with him haggling the banker to just increase the damn budget, give him five percent at least— you know what?! Twenty-eight percent actually for wasting his time like this! His projects are far more important than whatever capitalist endeavour Pantalone is stirring!

Then he drops it, with Dottore huffing, barely snipping back a snide comment and instead with a haughty simper, states that he knew what Pantalone has been doing these past few months: The whole sweets debacle? Ha! He figured that it had been the Regrator from the very beginning, how dare he think of him an easy fool? And if he really wanted a new device to sell, he should have been a proper business man and went to him directly instead of playing around with childish antics like sugar bribing.

And Pantalone, for the first-time since this meeting - falters, his beguiling smile twitching down for a moment as his brows furrowed.

Three ticks from the time-piece on the table, and Dottore's grin drops. Why does the banker look so... confused?

Then Pantalone hits the final nail on the coffin with a genuine question: "I have not, Doctor... You mean to tell me that it hadn't been you purchasing those shipments of sweets?"

And there they are, two confused Harbingers sitting around a tea party spread in silence, looking at each other blankly (coincidentally, Pantalone had set it up to ease Dottore's inevitable sour mood during their deal)

Thus begins the recounting, with them trading facts and comparing the timeline. Pantalone had noticed the uptake of sweets/ingredient imports from Sumeru a while ago, and that salaries of agents (especially the new recruits on Dottore's side) spend their pay checks on those orders. How did they know that he liked those?

The investigation commences, this is simply far too bizarre for the Doctor to leave alone. Cue in the poor recruits suddenly getting a vaguely veiled interrogation. They haven't done anything wrong, so they wouldn't be hurt. Maybe.

That's where Dottore is reminded of his... fanclub. He knew that they existed, he just didn't care for them. What caught his interest however are these Fatui handbooks that were edited to have unofficial rules. A good lead.

Hilariously though, the moment he got ahold of one - he doesn't even make it onto the first page. He just sees the title: Everything we know about our Lord Harbinger Il Dottore thus far [And his lover (name)] Version 78

He just stares at it... stares at a specific name, and with a defeated sigh, it all clicks together. Of course, of course it had been YOU.

Excuse him, he has to look beyond the windows of the palace for an hour at least, to watch the snowfall of the eternal winter as he ponders on how the FUCK did he not figure that out sooner—

Does this hurt his pride as a perceptive scholar? Yes. Did he embarrass himself in front of the Regrator with a false accusation? Yes. Is he going to bite you now? Yes.

(Reader: *sensing foreboding* ... something just happened.)

AHHHHHHHH *screams* The idea of Dottore embarrassing himself right in front of Pantalone is absolutely hilarious. He thought he was being so smart too, trying to expose the banker for the little scheme he's been pulling for so long. What? Did you think he wasn't going to bring it up, that he was silently going to go along with it? Well, this is what happens when you decide to be greedy and unrelenting, in fact, this whole thing is far more embarrassing for Regrator than himself, Dottore huffs, waiting for a reaction and response from his co-worker. Because Dottore thinks he caught him.

Only to be met with nothing. The silent blank looks the two men give each other are almost comical, and when Pantalone replies with genuine confusion, Dottore can feel a little headache coming on, but he needs to know what is going on because even he is confused, and that's something that doesn't happen every day. He only grows more and more baffled but interested. Why was this information leaked in particular... by who...? He keeps this fact quite hidden from others, if they found out about this, what else do they know?

Getting questioned by Il Dottore himself is bound to shiver some boots... but to his luck, he ran into a group who was... almost excited to see him? He thinks so at least, he can differentiate shaking from nervousness and excitement. And that's when he remembers his... fan club, is what they call it. Even he thinks it's strange but whatever. However, he does find out that each of these clubs has their own handbook. In reality, Dottore has only read the general Fatui handbook once in his life, and that was when Pierro recruited him and made him read it just as a general procedure, and the Harbinger never picked it up again. But he doesn't even need to open the book (given to them by a member who was simultaneously terrified but proud to present the masterpiece to their Lord Harbinger) to check the differences due to the title.

Everything always led back to you, didn't it? You always have to cause trouble, don't you? He's exasperated. All this running around and pointing fingers when the root of the problem was snuggling up to him every day like they did nothing wrong. Dottore, for once in a long time, feels incredibly stupid. Why did it take him so long... you and your big mouth... ugh. He's going to teach you how to keep it shut now (lots of biting and kissing)

At the very least, the one thing he can respect is how the agents refused to expose you as their secret contributor, despite the clear evidence... he can respect their loyalty to you. (Maybe if he makes you tell his agents stuff instead, they'll be more efficient with it. He didn't know they liked you this much...)

(You probably sneaked that one Fatui chef some good recipes and tips, because you felt bad at all his failed attempts. They're all eternally in debt to you.)

Reader: *sneeze* i think someone is talking about me... (also instantly had a bad feeling when Dottore came to your room with that smile on his face)

[twigg96]

I Should Have Been There

Daryl Dixon X Bitten Reader fic

Era: Alexandria

Pronouns: She/Her/You/[Y/N]

Warnings: Cannon divergent, talks of illness and zombie bites in detail, kidnapping, descriptions of limp amputation, blood, talks about prosthetics, Angst, Hurt/comfort

Summery: After Daryl goes out for a run, Pete Anderson asks you to help him carry some records back to his office for him. What you never expected of the doctor was to be locked up in a torture chamber with a walker as a punishment and statement for Rick to take heed to not fuck with him or his family ever again. It's up to Glenn, your best friend since before the outbreak, Daryl your boyfriend, the ingenious thinking of Maggie, the invisible nature of Carol's investigation skills, and Rick your over protective leader to find you. But will they find you in time to save your life?

Your POV

Walking around the walls of Alexandria for the 100th time that day you began to feel. The cabin fever beginning to take hold of you. Being out on the land for so long, free to go where you wanted, run where ever you wanted with the threat of walkers being the only thing keeping you awake at night truly was a luxury you were missing around now. Rick and Michonne had instructed everyone to keep your heads down. Keep to yourselves as much as possible. So you did as told even if you did wish Daryl had smuggled you on his bike on his latest run outside. But if anyone needed the escape more than you it was your boyfriend. With a deep sigh you tapped the metal of the wall with your wrench listening vaguely for any sounds of defaults or hollowness in the sound that reverberated back to you indicating a missing nut or rust that needed to be brushed away. Maggie, your chore partner for this particular job looked over her shoulder to you eyeing you with her dark eyes. "What? Am I not entertaining enough company fer ya?" She teased, knowing exactly what was bothering you. The poor brunette had her ear chewed off for hours the night before when you found out your boyfriend had taken yet another long run without even saying a word goodbye. "No..." You muttered, boredom dripping from your voice. "Just antsy." You replied not even looking to the walls anymore as the two of you continued your rounds. "How about this?" Maggie muttered, turning around on her heel so that she was walking backwards facing towards you. "We finish our shift, and I'll talk Deanna into letting us sneak past the gates for an evening stroll picking flowers?" She cocked a brow making the offer sound as enticing as she could. Picking flowers sounded like the most boring job a person could have especially when there were so many more exciting jobs to be had. But if it gave you an opportunity to escape this Hell for a little you would put up with anything. "Sure." You smiled, brushing some hair behind your ear.

"Morning ladies." A voice deep and sickeningly prideful called out to you both pulling your attention. You struggled to hide your disgust as you stared at the town's doctor, Pete Anderson. A dirty blonde towering idiot of a man who thought that using intimidation would get him places. Oh how wrong he had been once Rick had found out what he was doing to his wife... however his usual cockiness had returned and his air of superiority seemed to permeate even the space the three of you held, which worried you if you were being honest. "Can I have your help with something?" He asked, tucking his bruised hands into his pockets. "Just need help carrying some medical records and would appreciate the second pair of hands." He muttered meeting your eyes momentarily before turning them to the ground. Turning to Maggie you shared a glance, one that spoke more than words ever could. One of mistrust for the doctor but knew, in order to keep the peace with the town that one of you should at least try. Silently, Maggie glanced to the next wooden watch tower not even three tracker trailer lengths away. Atop it sat a very bored looking Glenn, his back pressed to the metal wall, his baseball cap pulled over his eyes, rifle resting comfortably over his lap. If you didn't know better you'd think the Korean was sleeping. But experience with your best friend had proved that the apocalypse had shaped him into one light sleeper. Maggie gave you a small almost indistinguishable look that told you to go. She'd stay and she and Glenn would come for you if she didn't see you by the time she reached her husband's post. Nodding you turned back to the doctor you shoved the wrench you carried deep in your pocket and stepped forward. "Lead the way, doc."

You watched the sky turn a ruddy orange as Pete lead you past rows and rows of very similar housing. If it wasn't for small lawn ornaments, flower and vegetable gardens growing, and hand made decorations you would have never been able to distinguish the houses apart. Placing his hand on your arm, Pete ushered you through a tight ally between two houses and into a space you never knew existed. Not that you ever explored beyond the main populace for fear of becoming eternally lost amongst the suburban hell. Beyond the pampered lawns of owned society were the untamed untended lawns of houses yet to find a owner. Their windows were dark and dust covered. Some were boarded with windows broken presumably from rocks thrown from the local hooligans that roamed the streets after dark. Pete lead you to one of the homes, a small nearly invisible basement door had been painted over making it nearly indistinguishable with the rest of the rest of the house's foundation aside from a rusted padlock that held the door shut and had warn with the elements. Pulling a set of keys from his pocket, Pete tried several of them with various levels of success before finally popping it open with a small click. Pocketing the lock, Pete unlatched the door and swung the door open with a loud squeak.

The basement was dark and dusty. Dirt laid on every surface that was bathed in light from the doorway. Mice droppings scattered the floor and the smell of stale air and mold filled the air making your stomach turn. The doctor however pushed forward into the darkness turning on a flashlight you never knew he possessed. Following close behind the man who craned his neck while swiping at spider webs that threatened to get in his face. "So where are these records at?" You muttered lowly, glancing at the man only now noticing how dark his bags under his eyes had gotten since your arrival. Dr. Anderson never responded instead he pointed his torch towards a wooden door locked with another series of padlocks. You cocked a brow but didn't question anything, HIPPA was a thing in the early world... you simply assumed he was one of the only ones who still adhered to it. Kicking an empty can of fruit to the side that must have fallen from one of the wooden shelves surrounding you, a sudden deep growl stopped you in your tracks. Grabbing the doctor's shoulder tight enough to bruise you quickly placed your finger to your lips. A walker?! Here in the town?! Maybe the house was inhabited at one point and the owner died? Grabbing the wrench from your pocket you wished you had been smart enough to grab your knife from the armory that morning. Pete swung his light around where you pointed. To the floor to look for crawlers then through the shelving. You saw nothing but the shadows that made you even more wary then you already were. Looking above yourself you assumed that the walker had died in the upper levels of the home... You'd have to come back with Rick later to deal with it... "Let's get these records. Just keep your voice down." You whispered gesturing to the door with the padlock. The doctor nodded pulling his keys from his pocket to unlock the lock.

As the lock knocked against the latch, the growling grew, and your patience dwindled. "Jesus can you be any fucking louder?" You whispered, glaring at the man. "Doctors are supposed to have steady hands... right?" You hissed, ready to rip the keys from the quivering man's hands yourself and do it yourself. "Shut the fuck up." Dr. Anderson growled back unlatching the lock at last. Flipping the lock and unlatching the door with one motion Pete too a step back behind you, shoving you forward through the door. The unexpectedness of it all made you trip over the high step in the doorframe. You lost your grip on your wrench and it flew from your hand and skittered onto the floor into the darkness of the room. "Ah... what the-" You called out turning to Pete, a devilish grin crossing his illuminated face. "Rick thinks he can save everyone... Lets see him save you..." He muttered darkly. Your eyes widened at the doctor's words and a deep low growl echoed from further into the room. The sickening smell of decomp hit you like a truck and the silhouette of something vaguely human limped into the light. Scrambling to your feet you tried like hell to reach the door before it was slammed shut. But only you were too late. Scratching and banging your palms against the wood of the door you could hear your heart beating in your ears. No! No no nO! This isn't how it was supposed to go! "Pete please let me out!" You begged hearing the latch close and lock click. "I wager you have three days before you die of thirst... lets see how long it takes Rick to notice you're gone." Footsteps leading away from the door were followed by a small rustling and a high pitch squeak from the other door closing.

The growls from behind you grew only louder but in the pitch dark you had no idea how close or how many walkers existed in the small space. Pressing yourself firmly to the grimy walls you slowly started to skirt along the permitter feeling the cold wet cement under your fingers. Faintly you wondered what it was that was wet before figuring it was better to live in ignorance than disgust. As you rounded the first corner you found the sharp corner of something tall and heavy protruding from the wall. An end table? No it was far too heavy for that and metal. Sliding your hand down the side of the object you found it was long and rectangular with drawers. Ah so a filing cabinet or a safe. Interesting. Skirting around the object you hugged the wall as closely as possible hoping you were near the rear of the room and at least halfway around. But as your foot came in contact with a metal can sending it rolling across the floor you felt your body tense as the deep growling came from mere inches from your face.

Glenn's POV

The sun had lowered far beyond the forest and the lights of the town began to light. From Glenn's place upon the tower he could see the approaching headlights of Aaron and Daryl returning from their run . A smile graced his lips as he sat up slinging his rifle over his shoulder. Should make [Y/N] happy to see him home safe. "Glenn!" Maggie called up the wooden latter as he stood. Looking down Glenn smiled down at his wife. Everyday was little brighter when he saw her beautiful face. "Hey Mags. Where's [your nickname]? She run off to be with lover boy already?" Glenn asked a smirk gracing his features as he climbed down the creaky latter. "No... I was just about to ask you if you'd seen her..." Maggie muttered worriedly. Glenn cocked a brow hopping the last step of the latter. It wasn't like you to skip work ever. "Why? Something wrong?" Glenn asked moving the hat on his head to wipe away the sweat that was building underneath. "Dr. Anderson came by earlier..." She drawled rubbing her arms and looking around nervously. Glenn frowned wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "I saw them walk off together into the town a few hours back... want to take a walk with me up to the garage? I'm sure she just got caught up helping the doctor. She just got carried away talking with Daryl." Glenn muttered, although his voice didn't hide the worry that he felt deep inside.

Walking hand in hand with Maggie to the center of town Glenn couldn't help but notice the blinds on the Anderson home flutter closed or the way the doctor had been peeking through his front door's window at the growing group just across the road from his residence. But the skilled tactician tried his damnedest to shove his negative thoughts to the back of his mind as they rounded the corner to the garage. Surely [Y/N] would be there, pleasantly distracted by her one and only. Oh how wrong he was... Daryl stood leaning against the garage wall talking to Aaron looking to the open bay door expectantly as the two walked into view. However the small defeated sigh, and deflated stance wasn't lost on Glenn when he noticed it was just the two of them. But... Glenn tried to stay positive. He had to... for his own sake if nobody else's. "Hey guys!" He called out waving jubilantly. "How was the run?" He unable to hold back a snarky laugh as Daryl flipped him off and rolled his eyes. "How'd ya think it went? We're back early." Daryl grumbled. "Awe shit I'm sorry about that, Daryl." Maggie said softly letting go of Glenn's hand to step closer to the archer. Daryl shrugged looking past them both and into the night. "Ya'll seen [Y/N] round anywhere? Normally they're the first ta greet me. She pissed at me 'r somethin'?" Daryl asked chewing the side of his thumb. Maggie shook her head. "No... we were hoping you'd seen her." Daryl shifted uncomfortably scanning Maggie's face for a moment with sheer scrutiny. "What ya mean? I was on a run all day I just got back." Maggie nodded meeting Daryl's eyes sadly. "Yeah we were hoping she'd be here with you... and that was the reason why she missed our meet up after she went with Dr. Anderson." Daryl tensed looking past Maggie to the Anderson household. "So ya think..." Daryl paused his face morphing into something dark and possessively. More so than Glenn had ever seen before from the stoic archer. "That bastard did something ta her?" Aaron shook his head, placing the socket wrench down on the work table beside himself. "Dr. Anderson? What? No way... I mean... the man has his bad days... and he's prone to drink but everyone has their vices." But Glenn didn't think he sounded convincing, even to himself. "I-I'm not sure. But she was supposed to be back by now." Maggie muttered worriedly looking back over her shoulder. "Ok... look I saw the two of them walking through the town earlier but lost them around here... I say we get Rick and Michonne and start looking for them." Maggie sighed rubbing her arms. "I hear you Glenn but I don't want to jump the gun." Daryl huffed staring at Maggie as if she grew a second head. "Jump the gun? Ya gotta be shitting." He snarled. Glaring back Maggie simply shook her head. "No of course not Daryl. She told me earlier that she wanted to get out of the walls... she's been itching to get out, cooped up in here she feels like she's going crazy. Maybe... if we're lucky she snuck out after she helped the doctor. Hopefully she just needs to cool down and took a walk. Knowing her she'll be back by morning." Maggie muttered running her hands through her hair. It seemed to Glenn that no one trusted a single hopeful word anymore. Why would they... after everything they'd been through. "Well I aint about to just sit pretty while [Y/N] is out God know's where tonight... I'm lookin' fer her. Do what ya want." Daryl growled storming towards his bike. Anxiety surged through Glenn as he watched Daryl climb his bike. "Daryl you just got back! You should at least rest before you head back out!" Glenn yelled placing a hand on the larger man's chest. "Glenn... I apricate yer concern but I've stayed up much longer and this is more important than any rest I need... Now move Glenn." Daryl murmured meeting Glenn's gaze seriously. So with a solemn nod Glenn stepped to the side letting the bike roar to life and Daryl take off into the night.

Daryl's POV

The ride to the gate was a short one, but it felt like the longest drive Daryl had ever taken in his life thus far. Not even the last ride he and Merle took together to the safety of the Quarry felt so long as this. At least then he felt safe. Secure with a partner by his side, family. No. Now was different. Now he was in an unfamiliar hostile environment that threatened not only his very existence, but the very love of his life as well. He felt so alone and exposed. Not even the familiar sight of Rick and Michonne standing by the gate speaking to Rochelle standing guard could ease his anxiety. As Daryl pulled up to the gate's entrance, his best friend's face fell his dark eyes scanning the archer sitting atop the bike. "Leaving so soon Daryl? Ya just got back." Michonne called out over the roar of the bike. Daryl shook his head glaring straight ahead. There were no time for pleasantries tonight. "Open the gate. I gotta get outta here." He grumbled to Rochelle ignoring her furrowed brow. "Look Daryl you should rest even if-" Rick tried to reason, reaching for the key of the motorcycle to turn it off and talk at a normal level. With a swift motion, Daryl caught the deputy's wrist glaring daggers into the man. "I aint got time fer that Rick." Daryl bit out shoving Rick away. "[Y/N's] missin'. I'm gonna head out an see if I can find her." Daryl huffed gripping his bike tightly to hide the way his hands shook with anger and anxiety. The archer watched a the ease wash from Rick's face, a stern and intense concentration falling into it's place. It was a look Daryl had seen before. One Rick held when he lost Lori. "Missing? What do you mean missing?" Rick uttered the peremptory question. Daryl growled not shaken by his best friend. "Ask Maggie. I aint got time to chat." Daryl muttered, revving the engine of his bike as if to make his point clear, gesturing to Rochelle to open the gate for him. "Daryl... [Y/N] didn't come through this gate. I would have seen her if she did." Rochelle tried to reason as the archer walked his bike closer to her. "You know as well as I do that there are areas on this wall that can be climbed over. I've seen you and Abraham using the same makeshift latter [Y/N] and I do to get out of the city for a walk when we don't want to be pestered. Now shut up and open the damned gate before I do it myself." Daryl growled not missing the tiny nod Rick gave Rochelle. "Ok... but I don't like it. But, you can go. Just be back by morning... if you can't find her by then, we'll spread out. All of us. Keep your radio on. Hopefully she just got lost in town again and will stumble home sometime late tonight. I'll stay up and radio you if she turns up." Rick called over the engine of the bike. Daryl nodded feeling slightly reassured knowing that Rick was going to do whatever needed to be done to find you. With a defeated sigh the petite woman unlatched the lock to the gate, pulling them open with a metallic screech. With a flick of his finger, Daryl turned his head light on and sped into the night praying to catch sight of you somewhere deep within the woods around Alexandria.

Glenn's POV

Sleep did not come easy that night for Glenn. Worry seeped into this very bones and leaked into his dreams morphing them into venomous night terrors that twisted his body and shook him to his very core. Images of your body ripped to shreds like one of the thousands of corpses he'd seen before flashed before his eyes. A long stretch of road with you tied gagged and bound at the end. The road stretching ever longer the harder he ran to get to you. His heart pounding in his chest. It was his fault. You were his best friend. Had been since before the outbreak. You were his responsibility. You and Maggie. He should have kept a better eye on you. Especially when you went off with Dr. Anderson. Glenn woke up to early morning sun shimmering off the cold sweat that covered his body. Maggie slept restlessly beside him, her moaning and whining accompanied by subtly jerks were indication enough that she was having yet another nightmare. They seemed never ending nowadays. Sitting up slowly as to not disturb what little sleep his wife was getting, Glenn snuck out of bed, pulling on a clean pair of jeans and a clean shirt before slipping downstairs. With any hope, you had slipped back home in the middle of the night with hardly any notice to any of them. It wouldn't be the first time you had slipped away... but as he stepped into the empty kitchen to put a pot of coffee on and crept quietly into the living room to peer over the couch to see who preoccupied it, either Daryl, [Y/N] or both. He was almost astonished to find Rick laying on the plush cushions, his attention turned to the door and a sleeping Judith pulled tightly to his chest. A single glance from the grisled police officer told Glenn he was awake and alert. Yet the dark bags under his eyes saying that he'd been up way too long. "Hey." Glenn whispered, leaning over the back of the couch. "Anything yet?" he asked, still hopeful, still optimistic. But Rick just shook his head, brushing the hair back out of Judith's face earning a deep contented sigh from his daughter as she slept. "Not yet." He murmured. Anxiety tightened Glenn's chest as he shuffled his feet. "Well... it's still early." Glenn whispered, looking to the door, hoping that in that moment both Daryl and [Y/N] would come waltzing in the door like a couple after a particularly eventful prom night. But it never happened. Instead the door stayed dreadfully closed. A less than hopeful hum came from the graying man as he shifted on the couch. "We'll see once Daryl comes back... she aint with him when he comes back we're going on high alert and searching every square inch of this place. Inside and out." Rick's voice was dark and commanding. It sent chills down Glenn's spine and before he realized what he was doing. Glenn nodded in compliance. The smell of fresh roasted coffee reminded Glenn of his first mission of the morning. "Want any?" Glenn asked standing straight. "Please!"

[Y/N] was gone... she never came back with Daryl. The look on Daryl's face when he pulled up on the motorcycle was enough to make Glenn's stomach turn. It felt like the day Beth passed all over again. Daryl was beside himself, pacing and grasping at his hair, the archer looked ready to faint. "I looked all over the ridges, Rick!" Daryl growled, pulling back and punching a sizable hole into the drywall. Blood dripped from his knuckles and soaked into the plush carpet as he paced once more. "I went the whole way out to the fuckin' shoppin' district. I cleared three shops we hadn't got to yet. I looked in the library. I searched every inch of the woods I could from the walls to about three miles out each way! I crawled in the damn sewer for Christ's sake!" Daryl was in retrospect fucking filthy. He was covered in zombie guts and dirt. And now Glenn completely understood what that third smell was that emanated from Daryl. "She's not out there I just know it... somethin' had to happen in here." Daryl muttered only stopping making his track in the carpet when Carol came back with a wet wash cloth for him to wipe his face and hands off with. "I aint doubtin' ya, Daryl." Rick tried deescalating the archer. "I just think a pass in the daylight with fresh eyes would be good... " Rick started ignoring the resentful glare he received in response. "Ya think I woulda missed her? I was calling out fer her! She would have heard me!" Daryl hissed, taking a challenging step towards Rick. But Glenn knew more than anyone what Rick was insinuating... that there was a chance you couldn't have answered. Be it because you were in danger... or dead. Rick stayed silent staring Daryl down trying desperately to get this point across to him without actually being the one to say it. "I just think we need to send a fresh new team out... You need to shower... eat something... then you can join Glenn in the city looking for her." Rick muttered definitively. With a small nod Glenn tried to pull a confident nod. "Yeah! I'll head out right away ok... so don't worry." Glenn muttered stepping as close as his nose would allow to the archer. Daryl rolled his eyes but nodded heading up the stairs to take a shower. Rick watched him carefully before turning to Glenn and Maggie. "Listen... I'll need everyone on this. Maggie I need you to talk to Deanna and explain that some of our people will be searching for one of our own outside of the walls... don't go into details yet. We don't want Dr. Dickface catching wind that we're onto him. I also don't want you to tell her we'll be searchin' in the walls too. If anyone has a chore, have them search while they work to be less conspicuous. The rest of us need to be as normal as possible while we look. Carol. You need to ask about locations in the walls that anyone would know of that is secret. Or that is kept off limits for any reason." Maggie and Carol nodded mentally noting Rick's instruction. "Ok, lets fucking find [Y/N]."

Your POV

Sliding around the wall you tried like hell to keep the growling, flesh-eating demon as far away from yourself as you possibly could. Unfortunately for you a pipe pultruding from the wall caught your shirt and caught you off guard. The small ripping sound from your shirt caught the monster's attention and the growling mutilated corpse surged towards you just as you lost your balance. Holding both arms out straight you screamed as the weight of another human pinned you back against the wall. A sharp pain shot through your nondominant hand and suddenly as a slippery and slimy appendage slid past your fingers you realized that the zombie had your hand in it's mouth. Adrenaline surged through you like a drug as the poison of the bite seeped into your blood. Using every ounce of strength you had in you, you pushed back off the wall, forcing the walker to stumble back. Gripping tight to his open jaw you grabbed the zombies skull and slammed it into the nearest thing you could find. The sharp corner of the filing cabinet. Over and over again you bashed the walker's skull into the sharp metal corner until the grunting and gurgling of the monster could no longer be heard. With a dull thud you released the beast and stood shaking, trying desperately to catch your breath as the stinging in your hand was becoming harder and harder to ignore. Reaching above you, you searched for a light source for the first time in only god knew how long. Just when you were certain you would die in the dark, doomed to turn into the very thing that you just slayed, you found a long thin string hanging from a single bulb in the ceiling. Giving the string a quick yank you could have cried when the light clicked to life. A breathy jubilant laugh escaping your lips as you shielded your eyes from the near blinding light that burned your retinas. But the faint dripping of fresh blood reminded you that time was not on your side. Your hand was a mangled mess. The bite forming deep in the meat of your palm you knew the entire hand needed to be amputated and fast. Ripping a thick strip of your shirt from the bottom you tied it off high on your armpit pulling it as tight as you could. Searching the ground you were happy to find your wrench placing it in your makeshift tourniquet you twisted it until the blood stopped and tied it off.

You didn't know how much time had passed since you had been bitten but your entire arm was starting to turn a deep unappealing color and your head was beginning to spin. You had emptied your stomach into the corner of the room several times after the effects of the adrenaline had worn off. You knew one of two things were going to happen... you were either going to die here, trapped in a basement of a house no one would ever find. Or Daryl would find you... he always did... and he would have to kill you. Sweat gathered on your forehead and your stomach flipped. You had no idea if you tied the tourniquet tight enough to keep the infection from spreading... even so, you could simply be dying from sepsis. That was an old world disease wasn't it? God you couldn't even remember. Sitting up against the door you really took in the room for the first time since you got there. The filing cabinet was covered in blood and viscera. But it looked expensive. Like one of those fire safe ones that promised to keep your documents safe even in a whatever class fire. You wondered vaguely what it was doing there before deciding that you didn't have the energy to search through it. The only other things you could see were the pipe that got you into this mess that seemingly went nowhere and were the home of a lonely pair of handcuffs hanging from them, rusted and bloody. Cocking a brow you turned to the zombie laying against the wall on the other side of the filing cabinet. Sure enough the flesh on the walker's one wrist was bloodied and broken. Looked like you weren't the only one shoved in this hell hole to die... lovely. Above the pipe was a vent. Presumably for fresh air to filter in from somewhere within the house you sighed and laid your head back against the wood. Your throat was sore from screaming. But what the hell. Maybe eventually someone would hear you.

Leaning your tired body against the concrete wall directly below the vent you screamed with all your might. Your throat ached and you couldn't help the aching cough that came once your voice started to fail you. For the longest time you received nothing but silence in return. Once in a while the scurrying of mice over what you could only assume were the radiators and vent covers of the empty house echoed through the pipes of the vent sending a jolt of hopeful optimism through you that quickly died out with every pleading cry for help. After a while you gave up. Sliding down the wall you leaned your body against the cold concrete, resigning yourself to death, when finally you heard it. "Hey!" The voice echoed loud and clear through the grate of the vent so loudly that you could had sworn the man screaming was in the same room as you. Listening closely you stood once more, praying that you hadn't just hallucinated the voice or dreamed it into reality as you had seen Rick do a thousand times with his lost loved ones. "[Y/N]! Are you in here?!" Glenn cried out loud and clear, and you could have just just kissed the man had you both not already been sworn to other people. "Glenn!" You screamed, banging the vent as hard as you could to catch his attention. "Glenn can you hear me?!" You nearly begged, clutching a pipe for dear life as you heard footsteps. "[Y/N]! I hear you! Where are you?" Glenn screamed the sounds of footsteps became more frantic. Sounding nearer then farther as he presumably searched room to room for you in the house above you. "I-I'm in the basement Glenn!" You screamed, tears falling from your cheeks easily as you sobbed. "Listen! It's not safe here! There are walkers here!" You heard Glenn's footsteps slow as he listened. "Walkers?" He asked tensely. "Yes! I killed the one that was in the room with me... b-but Glenn-" A loud thud cut you off and you were sure something horrible had happened before Glenn cut you off. "Don't say it... I'm coming to get you... so just... just stay put I'll get you out." Glenn growled, his footsteps becoming more and more distant until they and his voice could no longer be heard. "Wait! Wait!" You cried desperately, tears streaming and washing the dirt and blood from your face in thick streaks. "Glenn! I need you to tell Daryl I love him!" You screamed as loudly as you could, pacing the small space, you suddenly realized just how tiny it really was. Never before had it felt so claustrophobic. Never before had it felt so much like a prison until now. Until you felt so completely isolated. Walking to the thick wooden door you slammed your good hand against it kicking and screaming with all your might praying that maybe it would give way just enough to let you pry your way out and get to Glenn.

"[Y/N]!" His voice froze you in place and melted your heart into pieces breaking you down into heart wrenching sobs that hurt your chest and burned your lungs. Daryl was somewhere outside of the door. You could hear him clear as day. But a greedy part of you never wanted him to find you... The selfish part that knew deep down that Daryl would always want to finish things himself... the one that also knew he could never finish this by himself if he needed too. He just couldn't but he wouldn't allow anyone else to do it and it could endanger everyone... Bu that was why you loved him. He loved and felt so purely. You'd have it no other way. "Daryl!" You sobbed out, hearing a distant banging turn into wood clattering onto concrete you knew that someone had broken down the basement door. And if you had to guess it was Rick or Daryl. "{Y/N]! Darlin' where are ya?" Daryl cried out frantic worry in his voice as, his footsteps paced the concrete just outside the door where you were kept. "There! There's another door." Rick growled, sounding manic and breathless. So it was him who bashed down the last door... "[Y/N] if your in there back away from the door! Rick's gonna break it down!" Glenn cried out making you scramble back from the door in time to see the blade of an axe pierce through the wood. It took six swings for rick to make a sizable enough hole for both he and Daryl to fit through. You noted that it would have only taken three if it were just Glenn and Michonne... but who was counting... Holding your wounded arm as closely to your body as you could you stood shaking, covered in blood and sweat, and shaking like a leaf. Daryl stepped through first, Rick and Glenn following close behind then Michonne. The four stooges... would have been funny under different circumstances. Daryl eyed your injured body a deep frown forming on his face as he stepped closer to you. "Sunshine..." He started, holding out a hand to touch you, but as if on instinct to protect the man you jolted away as if your simple touch would burn him. Shaking your head you let the tears fall, words unable to form as thick sobs got stuck in your throat. "Wha'-" Daryl tried again, desperate to avoid the obvious. Maybe you just cut yourself... maybe it was crushed... hell maybe there was a curse put on you and he could just... fix it! But everyone else knew better. Glenn looked devastated shaking his head and backing away into the extended storage of the basement. Michonne was already unsheathing her sword, looking to Rick for guidance. Rick... He stood stock still, a grim firm look on his face. You could tell he didn't dare say a word until Daryl gave the order to do something... anything... but you... you had to make him understand first. "Baby. I love you more than anything." You started sadly meeting Daryl's eyes. But the archer wasn't just going to take that. No... it couldn't go down like that... not after everything. Not after all this! "So... it's a bite then..." Daryl tried to sound calm, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. You could only nod. "Daryl-" You tried to reason with him... tried to explain that he and Glenn should just wait outside. You'd meet him later... that one day he'd wake up with you by his side. But the brunette archer wasn't about to take it laying down. "We'll cut it off." Daryl bit out between gritted teeth turning to Michonne who only looked shocked then sad. "Daryl... fevers set in... you know we need to-" She tried to reason, but Daryl simply shook his head grunting and glaring at the floor like a child throwing a tantrum. "If you don't do it I will." He growled, reaching for the knife he carried with him everywhere, and suddenly fresh adrenaline pumped through your blood making you shake and shiver in both anticipation and fear. Rick sighed shifting his weight. "We do this... and she turns... you're gonna have to be the one who-" Rick muttered, once again cut off by Daryl's grunt and shake of the head. "Won't happen I won't let it." Daryl growled turning to you assuredly.

Michonne tried like hell to make it quick. You'd thought that after so many heads she'd severed that the blade on her katana was as sharp as they made them. It was sharp but despite all of her best efforts, your screaming begging and crying she could not make it go through bone. So despite every ounce of begging you tried. Every time you begged Daryl to just kill you as he held you tight to keep you from moving. It was Rick's axe that freed you from your diseased arm. Your vision blurred, your voice slurred, and everything sounded like you were resting at the bottom of the ocean as you met Daryl's worried eye, the last thing you saw before everything went black.

One Week Later ~~~ Daryl's POV

All the walkers that slipped through the gates had been slaughtered by Rick and the town meeting to decide Rick's fate for his earlier spat with the Dr. had ended with both the town's leader Reg, slayed by the Dr. himself and Dr. Anderson executed by Rick as ordered by Deanna... It certainly felt as if all hell was breaking loose on Alexandria. At the town meeting Rick unloaded on the residents of the town. Telling them all about the torture room the Dr. had set up and how if Alexandria ever truly came under attack the residents would never be prepared for a fight. Rick set up trainings for the residents. A new doctor was put into place, her Dr. Denise. Her first patient, treating the infection that was setting into place in the wound of the unconscious woman that had laid in the medical office for over a week now. Daryl could tell Denise was extremely underqualified for the position. Books upon books of medical texts lain in high stacks around her as she dug for the best treatment melody to give you that wouldn't trip an accidental allergic reaction but also treat the wound, fever, and kill the infection. Daryl watched the timid doctor carefully, placing you on a heavy dose of IV steroids and an even heavier dose of IV antibiotics. "Are you just going to sit there all day..." Denise asked once she had the courage to ask. Daryl shrugged from his seat at the corner of the room. He hadn't planned on leaving yet. As a matter of fact he hardly left your side. "Well as long as your here you can keep yourself busy." Denise huffed, tossing a wet, soapy rag to the very confused archer. "It's time to redress her bandages and give her a sponge bath... figure if you're here you might as well help me bathe her."

There was nothing more intimate than bathing with your partner. Lathering each other's bodies up. feeling the way the warm suds slipped through your fingers as you ran your hands across their most intimate parts. But this... this was different on an entirely new plane of weird. Daryl felt almost like a massive pervert, touching you like this while you slept. But after a few less than gentle reassurances from Denise reminding him that it was crucial to get every bit of you body, he complied, happy to do the work himself, refusing to let another human being get this up close with you in his life. But just as soon as he finished and was certain that the bandages coming off today were actually looking better than they did the day before, he bolted for the door. Refusing to be wrapped in another medical tasks. "Should I leave the office unlocked for you tonight again?" Denise asked making Daryl turn slightly. He wanted to punch the glass out of the stupid door in frustration. He wanted to yell "I'll be back by dinner! She'll be awake and hungry by then." But he simply looked to the floor and nodded feeling a wave of shame and embarrassment wash over him as she sighed. "Ok... I'll set up a pillow and some blankets for you on the couch."

The walk to Aaron's garage was a short one but it was easy to pass up when Daryl's mind felt heavy and weighed down. "Daryl!" The archer heard his friend call out expectantly. Turning on his heel Daryl hummed darting into the garage and finding his seat on the upturned bucket next to his bike. "Hey... you looked lost in though... is everything ok?" Aaron asked tinkering with a wrench and socket joint. "'M fine..." Daryl growled reaching down between his knees to grab a screwdriver. Aaron hummed in return. A calm silence that both knew all too well. Daryl had more so vented to his friend about the entire situation days ago when Rick had to drag him out of the medical bay to let Carol and the Doctor stitch her wound. "Oh! Hey..." Aaron muttered absentmindedly reaching behind himself to pull a large project forward that was covered with a sheet. Pulling the sheet away, a robotic hand sat proudly on a pedestal hooked to various wires and gadgets. Daryl stood slowly, a look of confusion crossing his face as he stepped closer to the counter. "Wha's that?" Daryl asked glancing at Aaron. "Oh I used to work in robotics for a time... I thought it was cool and this was my version of the prosthetic my uncle should have had a chance to have." Aaron muttered taping the wires to the skin of his arm. Squeezing his hand, Daryl watched in amazement as the robotic hand followed and matched Aaron's every movement exactly. "It's all electricity based. The movement and power of the prosthetic comes from the natural electricity found in the body. I could fashion a quick joint to go along with this, just a piston that would lift the arm up and down on swivel for the elbow if you'd think [Y/N] would be interested..." Aaron muttered meeting Daryl's gaze tentatively. The archer couldn't help but smile. "We'll see what she says... but I'm sure she'll love it."

As day turned to night and Daryl bid farewell to Aaron, his belly full after a large supper at his friend's and Eric's house. Daryl strolled the darkened streets of Alexandria wondering, if he'd ever get to do this again with you. Walking into the medical office he was grateful to find the front door unlocked and a blanket and pillow setting out just for him just as promised. But something was off... something was different. Normally when he came to check on you the bed was lying flat for the night, the monitors turned on so whoever came to check you at night could check your heart beat and the lights were off. None of those things happening right now. Your heart monitor had been shut off creating an eerie quiet in the building. Your bed was sitting upright but your body was slumped over the side of the bed. Soft groaning and whining came from you and an intense panic fell over Daryl as he instantly grasped the end of the bed to steady himself. He knew Rick told him... But he hadn't truly believed he'd had too... "Fucking God... Fuck." Your voice, albeit extremely annoyed voice, threw Daryl for a loop. You were alive... More importantly you were a-fucking-wake! Scrambling to your side, Daryl hoisted you back into bed not able to contain the face splitting smile that crossed his features. "Woah there... what are ya doin' Sunshine?" Sunshine... god he'd never thought he'd ever say that word again. "Daryl!" You cried wrapping your arm around your boyfriend. "Thank God you came. I dropped the remote to the bed and it tried to make me into a sandwich!" Daryl couldn't stop the laugh that burst from his chest. kneeling down slowly he picked up the remote, handing it to his love before enveloping her as carefully as he physically could. His laughter slowly turning into heartfelt sobs as you stroked your fingers through his hair. "I should have been here." He whined. "It's ok baby..." You whispered, kissing his crown then his lips tenderly, sweetly. "You're here now. That's all that matters."

[alexwilltellyouthings]

Entirely self indulgent rating post about the top 10 TV shows that made me fucking insane for some reason

10. Sense8

God, this was so good. Such a blessing. I saw part of the cast during a Pride Parade and it's one of my favorite memories. I felt every possible emotion with this show, I love it.

9. The Last of Us

This is kind of a cheat, because the obsession comes from the games, but it is what it is. It's one of the few games that had a big impact on me and I closely relate it to my relationship with my dad. Can't wait to cry my heart out at season 2.

8. Good Omens

It's a given, isn't it? That stupid angel with his stupid demon and their stupid God. GRRRAAWW. A lot of thoughts and feelings came from the fandom, I have to point out. It's been very nice.

7. The Umbrella Academy

I have the first issue of the comics autographed by Gerard Way!! I mean, yes, it's because I'm a MCR fan, but it became even more precious after I got into the show. I'm rewatching right now, preparing for the last season. I'll be a mess when I say goodbye to them. Can't even really think about it too hard or I'll cry right now.

Continues under the cut

6. Our Flag Means Death

LISTEN THIS CHANGED EVERYTHING TO ME. What do you mean we can have a show THIS queer? It's all I want now. I ate it up. I smiled so much. I wanted this so badly and had no idea.

5. Interview with the Vampire

Feels like it should be top 3 honestly but I'll get there. This is also a cheat, I've been reading the Vampire Chronicles since I was like 15. Growing up with Anne Rice probably messed me up but hey at least I have great taste. And seeing them on screen? The way they made it BETTER? And Lestat?? Who has been haunting me for 15 years on and off??? And the second season and their reunion and and and?????????? I'm STILL insane about them and will be forever, I'm afraid.

4. Doctor Who

Listen. Listen. Okay. Yeah. What can I say? If you get into it, you're doomed. And I have been doomed for 10 years at least. I stopped watching for a while and got back last year, and it hit me all over again. I love this dumbass genius alien in a way that's calm, even. Just a permanent part of who I am now.

3. The Untamed

The year was 2022, it had been a while since I had a proper fixation and I didn't think it would happen with this danmei live-action, but then came Wei Wuxian. Guys, if I tell you I fell in love. Couldn't stop thinking about him. Everyday I was plagued by his smile and red ribbon and tragic backstory, yadayadayada. I really like other characters too, and their stories, but WWX did something to me that I still don't quite understand.

2. Queer as Folk (US)

This was a looong time ago and it didn't really persist over time like the others, but it was my first actual obsession. I was clinically insane over these gays. I had no one to talk to about them, so for every episode I wrote several pages of notes to comment to my (only) friend at school the next day, the poor thing. It was pretty much all I talked about because I spent EVERY MINUTE we had to talk going over the notes and explaining the episode. Like, between classes, during breaks, everything. Months of that. She held on firmly because she was a good friend, but I'm aware it must've been terrible. Like I said, insane.

1. Dead Boy Detectives

Maybe I'm putting this up here because it's my current hyperfixation? Maybe. But I don't think I have felt something hit as strongly as this since QaF over there. This time I can participate in fandom so I don't need to write every thought I have because it's all a big talk anyway, but I'm still pretty much having those thoughts all the time for *checks notes* nearly three months. I'm writing more than I have in years. I'm back at Tumblr after I don't know how long. I'm staring at GIFs over and over like I have the fucking time for that. I'm distracted at work daily. I talk about it in therapy. I have the main cast's notifications on. I'm getting involved in fandom discourse sometimes even knowing I shouldn't. It's a nightmare. I love it. I love them.

If you read all of this, congrats! Now you know how my mind works, kinda!! I'm open to talk about any and all of these shows. It's amazing how they mess us up. It's also scary, but anyway.