#Like doesn't she get it? People are being asked to participate in their own conversion therapy.

[is-this-really--life]

It can be so frustrating talking to other bisexuals that think their experiences are universal. It's like, I get it's tempting to want to think the rest of the world is like you but that they draw their lines arbitrarily and closet themselves as one thing. But that isn't true. There are actually a lot of people who are not capable of being attracted to one sex or the other.

The attraction you've experienced to women is the same as a lesbian's and yet you are still capable of being attracted to the male sex because that's who you are. That's your sexuality. Exclusively homosexual people do exist and you can't keep treating them like their sexuality isn't real and their boundaries don't matter. Not everyone is like you. If you "only see gender," not biological sex, when it comes to your attraction, so be it. But there are other types of people in the world. People who should have the right to not be attracted to the male form and to avoid penis in their sex lives, and be open about that, without being put under a microscope or put on trial because of it.

[respectthepetty]

Waiting for a Choice?

Nobody talks with Day. All of the interviewees talk about him but none of them actually speak to him. Mork was the first one to go back-and-forth with Day by asking him questions, and Mork looks at Day too. When he entered the room, his comments are at Day. Before that, everyone treated Day like a ghost merely haunting the room.

And even though this game of 21-questions is horrible, Mork says the silent part loudly.

Because to Mork, this is all about choices. He believes his sister chose her fate and abandoned him in the end. To him, he had no choice in the matter. She decided their futures for both of them. Even though she is dead, he has spent an entire year not living.

Day's family does this too. Night tells Day they are at the Society when they are already there. It's an afterthought to tell Day where they are going, and he doesn't ask Day if he wants to go in either. It is "where will you wait?" Where will you wait while everyone else goes about their lives? Will you wait here or there? Those are his options. To wait. He is allowed to wait while everyone else lives, but he can't participate.

This is a place for the Blind, yet Day can't go in, and when he does, the receptionist pities him, and his brother gets upset.

By all means, this place should be THE place for Day with its "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've always wanted" inspirational word vomit, yet all the people stare at him.

Then, on the way home, Day's mother tells Night to speak to Day about the documents even though Day is sitting right there hearing the entire conversation.

Being a caregiver to a family member is extremely difficult. Mostly if animosity already exists.

And even though it's an English translation, the use of "have" is the subtle shift in a family relationship to a caregiver dynamic. A brother has to take care of his younger sibling. A brother now has to rely on his older sibling. Regardless if Night wants to help, he has to. Regardless if Day wants Night's help, he has to take it. They don't have a choice.

When Day exits his car, a point he made to Night, Night hesitates to go after him because they are in the middle of traffic and in the middle of a fight. Yet Mork runs into traffic to get Day, and for the first time in the episode, Day gets asked questions: "Are you okay?" and "Where are you going?"

It hasn't mattered if Day is okay up until now. It hasn't mattered where Day is going because he has to go where he is told. He doesn't have a choice. According to everyone else, he is a living ghost. He has been stuck for a year regardless of what he wants, so even when he gets home, his mother asks him one question without waiting for a response before immediately asking Night what happened.

So Day returns the small gesture of conversation to Mork by asking another living ghost if he has anywhere else to be.

Which jump starts their second game of 21-questions.

Because neither is telling the other what to do. Similar to their first conversation, it's a shit show, but they are both engaged in this shit show. They are not being told to participate. They are not being told what to do. They are being asked questions and they can decide to answer or not. They get to choose. And they chose each other.

Which leads to the mom finally asking Day a question.

Mork is going to be crap at taking care of Day at first, but Day doesn't need someone to take care of him. He needs someone to see him. Day isn't a ghost of his past. He isn't haunting his own story. And he isn't okay. He is unhappy because he has nowhere to go and nothing to look forward to . . . according to the people with lives. He is waiting.

So the guy who is also stuck with ghosts from his past haunting him simply asking questions is enough of a reminder that they are both very much alive, so they must make a choice to actually live.

Which is why Mork asking Day, not his mother or brother, but Day when he starts is very important.

Because these two are stuck in the present with pasts that haunt them. But now they have a future of endless choices.

They just have to ask the right questions.

No, not that!

Much better.

[susieandhobbes]

I can't explain this, but Black women looking young is somehow being added to the convenient excuses to not ship Black women with popular white leading men but ~not in a racist way~

She's strong and independent, she doesn't need him

He's a mess, she can do better

She should be gay! or with minor Black side character!

NEW: She looks so young :(

I'm obviously picking on this particular person but I've seen several people dismiss SydCarmy because "he's a much older, mentor figure! that'd be inappropriate!" And like??? HUUUUH???

Sydney and Carmy are an absolute MAX of 5 years apart in age. And while Ayo looks beautiful, 19 she does not look! Sydney went to culinary school and has worked at several fine dining establishments before launching her own business, common sense says she's at least in her late 20s. And while Carmy has more restaurant experience, he was a literal prodigy who started young.

ALSO, this is kind of an aside but where the fuck is Carmy mentoring Sydney in any real capacity?

S1 - she gets hired, 2 days later she was like "hey I redid your entire business plan because your shit is fucked, a day later he asked her to lead the brigade and then ditched her. He went to cater Cicero's party with Richie and once again Sydney was in charge DURING A POWER OUTAGE. She quit mid-service, comes back, and he's like want to start a restaurant with me?? Not as a fucking mentee, as a partner

S2 - Sydney is making the construction timeline decisions and present and participating in financial/loan conversations with the literal owners of the Beef/Bear. Sydney is part of designing the menu. Sydney is hiring. The only mentor-mentee relationship she's in is with TINA!

Does Sydney look up to Carmy because he's in many ways accomplished her culinary dreams? Absolutely. But people acting like she's some bright eyed student he's teaching to dice onions is fucking crazy.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for telling my wife her book isn't that good?

So me (27M) and my wife (27F) have been married for 5 years. In the entire time we've been married, she had put her professional advancement on hold and chooses to stay at an office job with little potential for career advancement because her true dream is to write and publish books and she says she won't have time to write and pursue that dream if she has to put all her energy into a career she doesn't care about. I think that's not a good attitude to have, because being able to make money from writing books and getting published is really difficult and depends a lot on luck and her career choices impact me because we're married. If she doesn't reach her earning potential then I will need to make up for it by earning more for the both of us. So I feel a lot of the burden in finances while she just gets to chase her dream.

She has been resentful of me for a while that I don't support her writing, but I do! I think she's a great writer and I'm very proud of her, and I tell lots of people that my wife is a writer when they ask what she does. The only thing is that she's always talking about her books and thinking about them and talking about them to her friends and writing partners. She claims to have ADHD and writing is her hyperfixation but she's never been officially diagnosed and hasn't ever tried medication or anything. She'll work on them when there are things to do, like the kitchen is a mess or it's dinner time. And before people get mad at me for expecting her to be a maid I cook and clean a lot too. I just want more participation from her because I get tired of doing everything and sometimes I just want to be taken care of, too. She cleans and cooks sometimes, though she always half-does things, but it just bothers me when I get home hungry from work and she's been home for 20 minutes or so and she hasn't started cooking and the house is a mess and she's just sitting at her laptop.

If I'm honest, I don't like reading. English isn't my first language which makes it harder, and she writes what she calls "young adult books" and they're plots about teengers that aren't very interesting to me. I tried to read her book and got about six chapters in, but it was just really hard for me to keep going so I never finished it. Honestly I don't really care about her books, and it bothers me that her books are ALWAYS on her mind. For example if we're intimate, sometimes her gaze goes distant and I can tell her mind is elsewhere and probably on her books, and when we finally get time together it's like she's not interested in the conversation until it touches on writing or her books. I don't usually talk to her about her books much though, so to be honest she doesn't talk that much to me about it, she'll text other people. But I can tell she always wishes I would talk to her about it. I just wish she could be interested in something that isn't her own writing, like me and our life together.

So this issue kept coming up with her saying I'm not supportive, and I decided to take it to heart. I wanted to support her as a writer and help her achieve her goal of publication. So I sat her down and told her that while she's a good writer and her finished book is good, it's not great, and she's telling a story about a girl who's experiencing poverty and death and mental illnesses, all of which she doesn't have experience with, and it shows. It's a good accomplishment, but probably won't be published so if she wants to be published, she should maybe start something else. Well, she blew up at me and started yelling at me that I have no room to say that because I'm not the intended audience and I never finished it anyway and that she knows more about publishing than I do and her friends and family that read it thought it was amazing. But first of all, she can't trust her family and friends because they'll just support her even if it's not what she needs to hear, and I should be the one who she can count on to tell her the truth. Besides, I'm in the finance industry and know much more about business than she does. She got angry and stormed away and refused to talk to me for the rest of the day.

I don't want to apologize, because I think she needed to hear it. But she was so mad and even talked about it to her therapist, so I'm wondering if I'm the asshole for saying that in the first place and if she's actually right and I'm not really supporting her.

What are these acronyms?

[donationwayne]

here's my confession (I'm kind of hooked on you)

Pairing: Buddie || 6.5k/109k || Chapter 1/19 ||

Hello, I participated in @118bigbang !! This is the first chapter (I'll be dropping the rest through the month). I'm so excited to finally be sharing this fic with everyone, I've worked so hard!!! Lots of moral support from my friends in the Buddie Enablers Anonymous discord <3

This is also lovingly entitled: DILF EDDIE

Summary:

Buck is forced to go on a temporary medical leave after getting crushed by a flight of stairs. In the meantime, he works at dispatch while he recovers. One evening after work, Buck hooks up with a mysterious, hot, family oriented DILF. The following morning he’s mortified and a little love sick after discovering said hook-up aka Eddie Diaz is the newest (temporary) firefighter liaison--poached from a house in El Paso, Texas. Buck navigates becoming best friends and eventually work partners with his ex-hookup. In the meantime, he desperately tries not to fall in love. He fails.

Cue: An adorable five year old, prank wars, gay offs, break room gossip, a fake dating plot, firefighting shenanigans, a packed summer of PTA responsibilities, karaoke, and copious amounts of cupcakes and thai food

OR

tldr: the hot dilf from the bar is my new work partner ______

SNIP:

“Bobby invited us for lunch. Athena’s getting me out of the apartment and making me walk around like a dog who needs to get its energy out.” Buck explains earning a huff of amusement from Athena. Hen smacks him lightly for his mock petulant tone.

Without being asked, Hen loops her arm around his waist and helps him tackle the stairs. Buck lets out a slow breath, seeing firsthand that absolutely nothing has changed during his month and a half away from the team soothes him. Bobby is in the kitchen with Chimney who is pestering him incessantly. The sight makes his chest ache because he never wants to lose these people. They felt more like family than his own ever had growing up. In such a short amount of time they’d come to know each other so deeply, they've already been through so much—especially after Chimney had his incident with the wreck and the rebar. He was barely back from his own medical leave before Buck had his own incident.

Although Bobby nagged him for weeks, Buck opted for a tiny graduation celebration. At the time, he hadn’t known how to explain to Bobby that there was no one outside of his tiny circle of friends to invite. Now Athena knows though, and he needs to make a mental note to ask if she could keep their conversation between the two of them. He doesn’t want to change the way his friends see him, and he doesn't want pity. He’s worried this new information might be a little too on the nose.

“What’s new with you, Buckley?” Chimney calls across the room, smiling and waving. “How you healing up?” Buck slides into a seat at the dining table, and Bobby, Chim, and Hen turn their full attention onto him.

“I’m healing alright. They’ve still got me on track for a return after six months. I’ll be able to walk without the crutch before too long, my ribs should be healed in a couple of weeks. Then I’ll just have PT to contend with, because of the leg strain and the fracture, my trainer says it might be tenuous, so I have that to look forward to at least.”

“It’ll be here in no time,” Chimney promised. “You just need to get a hobby. You’re lacking in those. Maybe I could make you a list of movies, you’re tragically behind on pop culture.”

“Actually, I've accepted a temporary position at dispatch,” Buck admits. Bobby beams, and Buck barely restrains a groan.

“Yes, I finally caved.” Buck tells him, although he didn’t ask. “Athena took me to visit today.”

___ Reblogs to boost appreciated :)

[mdhwrites]

The Point of Asking How Bad a Parent Odalia is

My last blog was asking this question. However, with many of the responses I got, I feel like I failed to articulate the why for that question. The importance of it and I answered and then deleted an ask that gave me a chance to answer that because it ended up muddying the point by being a response. So, here it is:

If you cannot understand cultural perspective in fiction, how do you ever write a convincing world that is anything other than our own?

Most of Odalia's actions are deplorable... By our standards and sensibilities. When taken out of context. The problem is that unless a work is ENTIRELY allegorical, and incredibly smart with those allegories, that approach never works. In fact, the most effective speculative fiction takes the context of the world they've made and uses it to AMPLIFY the point they're making. To further reinforce the concepts they're going for. As such, questioning if someone who is framed as evil within a text whether they would be actually evil by the merits of their society is kind of important because that contrast can say a lot.

In TOH's case, this never coalesces into anything. Odalia being a good parent from the perspective of not wanting her child to be a criminal and so not wanting her to interact with rulebreakers or literal criminals... It doesn't say anything. After all, it's not like the rules dictate you must let someone else die or must be cruel. No, the rules they're breaking are things like "You need to be registered with the state," and "Don't skip class." I'm sorry but that isn't extreme in any way? Not unless we're supposed to just coddle people who don't want to participate in society and ignore them ignoring their social obligations? Like the coven system is the Isle's ONE real law and the covens aren't even jobs. You are beholden to no one getting a coven sigil because you still have to go get a job. It's like saying requiring citizenship in ANY country is bad because it holds you accountable to anyone. Because someone is placing any sort of restriction on you. That... That's a pretty shitty theme.

And it IS a theme. It's why the show essentially claims Camila to be a bad parent until For the Future. She renounces her ONE time that she ever held Luz back from being full force her and the audience, and Luz, are meant to cheer for this. That this is taking away some cardinal sin when, and this is in our context because it's supposedly Earth, the reason Luz was sent to Summer Camp, to make friends, was:

She brought a BOMB to school in the form of fireworks, which is against the rules, if not law, in any school, especially without advance permission.

She assaulted people with wild animals she could not control which is a crime literally anywhere.

She brought live, WILD. ANIMALS. into a school without permission, nor without a way to control them and keep others safe which is again, in most circumstances, a crime. And she does this one TWICE. Explicitly.

She is not sent to Juvy, or military camp or ANY sort of real correctional facility. She is sent to a life skills camp instead. Not a conversion camp of any sort, just one meant to teach her basic necessities of being an adult someday, something a lot of people actually argue should be a regular part of school curriculum for good reason. And this, THIS, was her going too far as a parent.

All Odalia being the worst parent ever is further reinforcement of a theme that claims being a parent is a bad thing. Flatly. If you are doing more than strictly keeping your child alive, you are a bad parent. I'm sorry but that feels really bad and like a pretty shitty theme if you ask me. It honest to god, more so proponents that neglect is good. Give them a room, give them access to food, then fuck off. That's... That's not what 99% of kids want from a parent. They want an actual parent. I mean, it even understands this with Reaching Out but even then, the final agreement is "I won't tell you what to do ever and when you want me, I will be available." Parents are more than just toys for their kids. I'm sorry to anyone who's finding this out now somehow. They are meant to teach you morals, how to interact with society, to prepare you for your future, etc. like that. They are also there to take care of you but they are not strictly your friends because they're there to help you improve to be a better person, much like how a therapist isn't your friend. This is a LARGE part of why parenting is so difficult.

To simplify it in the way so many lazy analysts do by going "X person was mean so they're abusive," is... Dumb. And bad. And helps no one. It also breaks your fantasy worlds so maybe try a little harder? Or just keep using buzzwords. It is the easier way to do it.

See you next tale.

======+++++======

The ask that brought this about mentioned Mother Gothel like Odalia and Gothel are even comparable in their writing which... No. Mother Gothel is praised for good reason because she 1000%, in universe and out, is abusive. Period. In every possible way, including Rapunzel's reactions about her.

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[getvalentined]

Actually while I'm on it, I wanna talk about the dichotomy between Genesis and Angeal. I'm not censoring names in this one because I'm not worried about it being read as character bashing, but it's a topic that I think is super interesting but I never see discussed outside the perception that they represent the dichotomy of good versus evil.

The dichotomy between these two is not and has never been good versus evil. Angeal having a white wing or insisting that he's honorable does not make him good, particularly when his idea of "honor" includes never asking anyone for help and forcing people that love him to do horrific things so he doesn't have to keep living as he really is. Conversely, Genesis having a black wing and referring to himself as a monster doesn't make him evil, particularly when everything he does in the actual storyline is an attempt to save himself (and his men), or at least make sure that Shinra falls far enough that it can't do this to anyone else.

That said, Angeal and Genesis are on opposite sides, just not in the way you most people assume.

Angeal is all about appearances, expectations, worthiness. He's never let go in his life, he was brought up in a poor household where he was presumably heaped with expectations and responsibilities by parents who were unable to properly care for him, and this led him to developing some extremely rigid and maladaptive ideologies. His concept of "honor" is probably the biggest one; we can see how he picked this up from Gillian pretty clearly in how she refers to the Buster Sword, and how we know she continually turned down Shinra's hush money and then never told the truth anyway.

Angeal sees "honor" as doing everything yourself, forever, the exact way that you were told. "Honor" is working yourself to death, it's not admitting when you're in over your head, it's accepting the worst situations as necessary even if they could be changed with the participation or contribution of someone else. It's dishonorable to ask for help. It's dishonorable to stop when there's still work to do. It's dishonorable to be indebted to anyone, even if the process of paying off a debt will kill you. It's better to die than to be dishonorable. He is his mother's son in every way.

By contrast, Genesis is all about independence, equality, justice. We can also see this in what we know of his background—Genesis was the brilliant son of a wealthy family, he gave Banora global brand recognition, his work with Banora White juice literally changed the entire face of his homeland's economy forever. He did this on his own. He figured this out because he wanted to share something with someone he admired, and he knew that the only way to make it worth something was to do it himself. However, where Genesis is independent, he's more than capable of asking for help, and he does over and over through the course of the game. Independence isn't about cutting yourself off from your community, it's about doing things in the way that works best for you, regardless of others' opinions.

Genesis' biggest issue is his concept of "justice," because it wheels pretty often into vengeance. At the end of the day he has three goals: survive, get Sephiroth out of Shinra, and make sure that the company can never do to anyone else what it did to him. He tries to ensure this by carving his way through anyone he feels stands between him and those goals, because Shinra deserves what he's doing and anyone who thinks otherwise is unjust. He's not self-centered, per se, but he has no empathy for anyone he doesn't personally care about, and it makes him seem cruel in a way that is entirely unnecessary.

It's pretty clear by the end that he's not intentionally cruel, just like he probably doesn't lack empathy by choice—but he does clearly struggle with empathy, and he clearly doesn't understand why anyone is angry with him when he knows he's right. He tells the truth without understanding that not everyone wants it. He can't conceptualize why someone wouldn't want to know.

Genesis' biggest problem is that he can't tell the difference between justice that strengthens the world around him and the people under his care, and vengeance meant to pay back the people and institutions that led him here in the first place.

The dichotomy in Project G was never good versus evil, it's external validation versus internal validation. Angeal needs the world to see him as right, while Genesis needs the world to back off and allow him to do things the way he already "knows" is right. The majority of Genesis' story takes place in his own head, and it's a broken narrative for reasons unrelated to the literal rotting; he knows what he's doing, he's methodical and clear in his actions, and he doesn't understand why people that know the truth don't agree with him. Angeal's, meanwhile, takes place primarily through Zack's eyes, because the opinions of others are what matter to him, and if he can't figure out how to make those eyes see exactly what he wants then he can't bear to be seen at all.

Basically Genesis is autistic, Angeal has OCPD, and Shinra has no concept of mental health care. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

[death-munchkin]

I have come to the conclusion that there is a very very large overlap in the people who assume that Astarion is "secretly uncomfortable" with a polyam relationship with Halsin and people who a) have zero social awareness, or b) are polyphobic, or c) both. Astarion is not uncomfortable with polyamory, he is uncomfortable participating in sex. Those are two very different things. Astarion is insecure about his ability to be a 'fulfilling' partner to Tav due to his aversion to sex, and that is a perfectly natural fear almost everyone who's ever been repulsed by or reluctant to participate in sex can attest to. My fellow Ace and/or sex repulsed people you should know well how scary it can be to not feel sure that your partner is satisfied. Astarion at no point sounds sad about the proposal, with the exception when specifically asking if it's because he hasn't been putting out enough recently (Note, Astarion and Tav would not have had sex at this point for a wee while), and if Tav reassures him that he is special to them just the way he is, he is genuinely happy.

"But he doesn't enjoy having sex with the Drow twins." My dear sweet child, he explicitly says he's not ready for that yet. At no point does he pretend to be okay with it only to secretly not be. He clearly and firmly says he is not okay with it, and you only get the narration about him seeming empty if you pressure him into it. This does not happen with Halsin. I repeat. This does not happen with Halsin! Astarion never, I repeat NEVER says anything akin to "not being sure" or "I don't know", or "I'm not ready for this" in regards to Halsin's proposition, while he CLEARLY says that about the Drow twins.

Why, you may then ask, is he uncomfortable with the Drow twins but not Halsin? Well, for one, the Drow twins are sex workers. And while in this house we 100% respect love and support all sex workers, they were unfortunately likely targets during his thrall days, and they almost certainly open up some wounds he's not ready to explore yet. Secondly, with the Drow twins he is pressured to participate. Again, Astarion is uncomfortable participating in sex, not with polyamory as a whole. Astarion would be uncomfortable being pressured into basic vanilla christian one on one sex with Tav just as much as he would be uncomfortable being pressured into sex with the Drow twins. That has nothing to do with polyamory. He would not be and is not uncomfortable with Tav having sex with, kissing or flirting with Halsin, as long as he is at no point forced to or pressured to physically participate himself.

Consider why every other character who is against a relationship with Halsin explicitly says so (for those of you who compare Astarion to Karlach, Karlach does explicitly say she is against it.) Consider how every single time Astarion is against something, with the exception of some events in Act 1, he explicitly says so. Consider how Astarion literally does bring up something that concerns him in that very conversation, and clearly states his concerns regarding his own sexual availability, but at no point even hints at being uncomfortable with Tav's romantic/sexual interests. And perhaps consider why you are so intent on having characters be "secretly against polyamory".

Because I will die on the hill that Astarion is a sex repulsed polyam sexual (possibly mono-romantic) pan gremlin of a man. edit to clarify: This post is about people who are insistent on that assumption, as in, refuse to accept that they may be mistaken, or that their assumption is exactly that, an assumption with no direct proof to support it. I don't mind people who headcanon, you live your life I'll live mine, I mind people who assume he's secretly against it, and then state that as fact and canon when it simply isn't, it's a headcanon, an assumption, a plot you would like to believe, NOT something established by direct canon evidence. If you prefer to read him as uncomfortable, that's fine and none of my business. If you prefer to read him as secretly strictly monogamous and either too insecure to speak up or doesn't realize it himself, that's fine and none of my business. Hell, if you draw fanart about it and write a whole ass 100 million word fanfic creating a whole new alternate universe which becomes more popular than the game itself, it's still fine and none of my business. But the second you speak your opinion and assert that it's fact, I have just as much a right to speak my opinion and tell you you're wrong.

[bengiyo]

She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat 2 Eps 13-16 Stray Thoughts

Last week, so much happened. Kasuga and Nomoto finally expressed how they feel to each other and have begun dating. Also, since Kasuga's aunt gave her dad her address, Kasuga has decided to move and asked Nomoto to move with her. Nagumo admitted her anxieties around food, and had become Kasuga's confidant. Kasuga and Nomoto also discussed how out they want to be.

Episode 13

I absolutely love opening on Yako and Nagumo being given the update on the relationship progress. It's what they deserve.

Hell yes! Assemble the whole squad for the house party! Is Sayama coming too??

A curry party with naan and lassi actually sounds incredible. I need to host one.

I don't have a lot of friends who also enjoy cooking together, so it's rare I get to work with others except my uncle or mom in the kitchen.

I love that Nagumo wants to participate and try things!

Ladies, please! You are a couple now!

Nagumo having some ice cream feels like a small but important bit of progress.

I like them sending the leftovers with Nagumo so she can try the naan and the curry.

This party was a total success. Few social experiences are better than successfully blending friend groups.

I'm enjoying this show leaning into the transition from friends to a couple.

Episode 14

I want to unpack the sales pitch of beer and marshmallows. Please discuss this in the notes. I think I prefer kick drums and red wine.

First a curry party and now a marshmallow party. This show is a treat.

I really hope that Nagumo actually finds help when she goes to the hospital. Pacing this so that we see her enjoying her time around meals with people so this can be a way for her to participate more has been a good choice.

I love, love, love Kasuga admitting she doesn't have much experience with dating and wanting to talk it through with a friend first. It's hard being queer sometimes because sometimes you just don't get a lot of dating experience in your teens.

Hey, a decent doctor. I am relieved that he gave Nagumo a name for what she may potentially be experiencing, and proposed finding solutions together based on his medical experience and knowledge. I remember being relieved when they finally diagnosed me with my own issues, because now we could treat it.

Unexpected Yako and Nagumo outing! Let's fucking go!!

This show is so kind. I love this because I find that I have decent neighbors almost everywhere I go. My neighbor's kids and my other neighbors' grandkids always run up to tell me about their days when I get home, and we often share kitchen gizmos. Just last week I helped one of the kids with some of their math homework after helping remove junk from his grandmother's shed. Their grandma made me this really nice brownie as a reward.

Yako is awesome. I'm so happy Nagumo stumbled into a group of friends to support her.

Episode 15

Yes! I want to see a strawberry picking date! The festival is coming up in another month and a half here!

I like this work lunch. Even though our pair is together, I am glad we're still checking in with Sayama's experience in the dating pool with men.

How are they going to look for a new place to live when it seems like it's always dark when they get home? This conversation about the physical, emotional, and financial realities of moving was necessary.

This is super cool. I kinda love that they allow folks to experience a part of how their food is made.

Ladybugs are a good sign! They prey on other insect pests.

Oh no. Nomoto is starting to worry that she's not being sensitive to Kasuga's wants.

Episode 16

Hell yes! We're talking it out! It actually can be really difficult when two accommodating people are together.

Looking for housing has gotta be difficult in a city that doesn't provide an overabundance of parking like the US. Trying to find a place that's in walking distance to a station that also has parking is probably going to be impossible.

Yako is right, as usual, but now I'm nervous about this big talk.

Every time there's a personal note from @furritsubs I brace for impact.

"I want you to be selfish in front of me." Thank you for inventing romance, lesbians.

I was touched by Kasuga talking about holding back on saying what she wants because she's never been prioritized.

Fantastic week. This felt so great after all the anticipation of the big ask around Valentine's Day. I'm so happy that Yako and Nagumo are friends, that Nagumo is starting treatment, and our ladies are navigating their relationship together with open communication. Super excited about the potential move next week, and maybe their first kiss.

[qqueenofhades]

as a woc (who is south asian, so i share that with harris), it's deeply upsetting to me that......nothing she could do would be right. i see people wondering why she isn't doing more, but then she does something, and then those same people pick that thing apart and tear her to pieces and it really does go to show that nothing we ever do will be "right".

i have yet to see criticism of her specifically that doesn't boil down to racism or misogyny (or a combination of both), and it's frustrating, especially in leftist spaces, because i do want to think critically and have conversations about what she's doing right and what she (and the administration as a whole) could improve upon, but i feel like i can't start or participate in those conversations without dealing with that same racism + misogyny. and this isn't even getting into the gop, this is about people who call themselves progressive/leftist/whatever. so much effort goes into maintaining the idea that they're better than the right, but i don't see nearly as much effort put into.....being better tbh

Unfortunately, among all their other problems, Online Leftists are a) often just as likely to be racist and misogynist as the GOP, and b) to strenuously deny that they are, weaponize that language in bad faith against people or candidates they dislike, and otherwise parrot abstract "social justice" talking points and Progressive Jargon while being absolutely noxious to the real, actual people that are involved. They do, as you say, assume they are Morally Righteous, and then don't actually interrogate that or question it in any way. So.... yeah. Yeah, pretty much. As I've said before and will say again, they are an absolute failure as any kind of practical or effective opposing force to right-wing fascism, and often inadvertently or even deliberately enable it in deeply disappointing ways.

It's funny that in all my posts/answers on the topic, I stated multiple times that if people could provide me an actual reason that made empirical sense as to why they didn't like Kamala, I was happy to have that discussion. Instead I got a lot of weird angry asks from people clearly still trying to justify their Hillary Clinton Derangement Syndrome (I only answered one of them because I have better things to do with my life), accusing me of being "emotional," "angry," "trauma-dumping" and God knows what else. And like. I'm sorry that pointing out a clearly verifiable fact (misogyny is what doomed HRC, anti-Obama backlash/racism was what enabled Trump) triggered y'all to that degree, but I think that fact is pretty illuminating on its own. And no, actually, I don't have to "get over" HRC's loss or "just accept" that people had "reasons" (conveniently never articulated, but they were real! They totally weren't misogyny! PEOPLE HAD REAL REASONS FOR NOT LIKING HER WHY WON'T YOU BELIEVE ME AND ACCEPT THAT!!!) for disliking her and/or not voting for her when her opponent was Donald F'n Trump. Like, I know they live in the magical realm of the Permanently Online where the real world suffers no consequences from their bullshit and the argument about why 2016 was not their fault changes daily, but that's not the case with us here on Earth. And yeah, we're pretty mad.

Kamala has, in my view, been doing a perfectly fine job as the vice president. She has been able to give a few powerful and relevant speeches about race relations, gun violence, abortion, and other topics. I occasionally see news articles from "anonymous sources" who "don't like her" or want to cause trouble for whatever reason, which I treat with the usual degree of skepticism that I employ when reading anything the mainstream media writes about Democrats (which is then repurposed and reused in the Online Leftists' "Democrats Terrible!" screeds in equally bad faith). Yet again, I repeat my offer for anyone who wants to complain about her for an actual and clearly articulated reason to explain what that reason is and why it's not a double standard, why it's not attributable to racism and misogyny (even and especially the unacknowledged sort), what they expect she should be doing differently, and why this is any kind of big deal for the actual mainstream electorate. But judging from previous experience, this will just trigger another round of anonymous WE HAVE GOOD REASONS FOR NOT LIKING HER!!! whines with cheese, and to that I say, yeah, don't even waste your time.

[paperstorm]

“My mom sent me to rehab. There’s plenty of good places in New York but she sent me to the other side of the country because she decided that one was better. My dad dragged me to Austin. Picked my therapist for me, made me live in his guest room like a teenager. And both of those things were the right choice in the end so I guess it’s not fair to be mad at them either, but neither of them asked me what I wanted, first. Or what I needed. They both just put me where they wanted me to be, and then expected me to be thankful for it.”

Love your new Missing Moments but this made me want to strangle TK. The spoiled brat should be thankful! If Gwyn had asked him what he wanted at that time he would have gone back to his little drug den and probably be dead. If Owen had asked him what he wanted before moving to Texas he very likely would have ended up back on drugs again and would probably be dead. I love TK to pieces, but you can't ask a drug addict what they want because a lot of times they're not strong enough to say that they want or need help.

Well first, in a way that is fantastic, because something I love playing with in these stories is an unreliable narrator who is giving voice to his own perspective and perception of events even if the reader isn't going to agree with what he's saying.

But second, as a recovering addict (who does not speak for everyone who suffers from this disability but can give at least some form of a voice to it) every case is different because every person is different. There are cases for sure where without forced medical intervention, a person will probably die. There are schools of thought that forced medical intervention is unethical even in these cases – the idea that forcibly removing someone's bodily autonomy in any situation where they are not an immediate physical danger to other people is not an ethical move even if it results in that person killing themselves. There are other schools of thought that believe things along the lines of what you said. I think I personally fall somewhere in the middle.

But choice and autonomy and agency are important, regardless of where someone falls on that debate. It's important to addicts because they are, first and foremost, human beings. And no human being likes to feel as if their loved ones are not respecting their autonomy or are forcibly removing their agency, even or perhaps especially if it's done under the banner of this is for your own good. TK, as I had him state in the dialogue, is very aware that his parents’ interventions likely saved his life. He is, as he says in a later paragraph after the one you quoted, grateful for that. But that doesn't mean he isn't also resentful of the fact that they never bothered to ask what he thought he needed.

Often addicts are very crystal clear about what they need. Often what's standing in their way is the fact that they can't get what they need, not that they don't know what it is. An addiction like TK's, in which he was still able to manage a full-time and incredibly difficult and demanding job, means he was not so far gone that he was incapable of rational thought 24/7. He wasn’t legally incapacitated, he would have been capable of participating in the conversation had his parents wanted to include him in that.

Even giving an addict a small amount of agency over their own decisions can be instrumental in their recovery, because it allows them to retain some semblance of control and to feel good about the fact that they are making the decision to get better. As an example, Owen could have let him pick his own therapist. Gwyn could have said "going to rehab is non-negotiable. Here are three I have done some research on, you can pick which one you go to." (As a side note, this is exactly why I think it's so important that in 3x08 she walked away at the airport and let TK go on his own. Because if TK had gotten into that car and said “Take me to a bar”, the driver legally would have had to do so or else it would be kidnapping. TK could also have just stood there for 10 minutes and then booked a flight back to New York. It’s so important that at the very end, Gwyn let it be TK’s decision to go to the clinic. For the rest of his life he can look back and hang his hat on that. That his mom gave him a push, but in the end he chose recovery. That he did it for himself.)

Sometimes, you’re right, there are situations where people’s loved ones are right to step in and take over. I don’t blame Owen or Gwyn for doing it in either of these moments, that’s their son and he was killing himself and what loving parent wouldn’t do what they did? But two things can be true. The fact that they made the right choice (and again, my TK knows that they made the right choice) doesn’t erase the fact that part of him is resentful that he feels like they didn’t value his opinion or his needs – or even know what his needs were, since they didn’t ask. And that lingering resentment flared up again when it felt to him like Carlos was now another person not caring about his opinion or needs. Those feelings I think are valid, even if they aren’t perfectly fair.

[mod-kyoko]

school au headcanons!! pt. 3

fandom: danganronpa: killing harmony

type: hcs, non-ultimate au

a/n: just how the characters would be if ultimates didn't exist

♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧

shuichi saihara

fucking mock trial kid if not debate

the shy but smart one

the one that the popular girls mess with like he's a little social experiment

his teachers love him because he always behaves in class and has amazing grades

kaede akamatsu

piano accompanist for the choir and theatre

in all honors classes and the honors society

perfect life?? does not struggle ever?? (seemingly)

the one girl as school who always looks held together and you've never seen her look anything less than happy and healthy and you're like please how

orchestra kid also (plays violin)

keebo

in robotics

kind of unnoticed

incredibly socially inept-

has the stereotypical small set of "nerd" friends that all sit on their computers at lunch and talk about video games and coding

kokichi oma

fucking theatre kid

class clown

some people hate him some people love him

some girl always humbles him when he gets too roudy in class

kind of the teacher's nightmare

ran cross country

rantaro amami

sk8er boy

every girl ever has a crush on him??? (but he's gay-)

secretly dating a soccer player

effortlessly popular somehow

honors classes

plays dungeons and dragons

kaito momota

the kid who carries a bluetooth speaker through the hallways-

p.e. is his favorite subject

runs cross country

the one who befriends the teachers that everyone else takes advantage of/teases

tsumugi shirogane

literally goes to school then goes home???

spends all her time in the library as an aid

self-sabotages her own social life

never ever goes to big school events but sometimes enjoys watching the play and musical

in the anime club

himiko yumeno

dnd player

people think she's weird but no one has beef with her

in quiz bowl 💀 (competitive trivia basically)

always participates in the school's talent show

band kid (trumpet)

maki harukawa

the girl that fucking hates everyone

always shows up to school just looking absolutely done

super quiet in class and does really well

her counselor tried to get her to join some extracurriculars so she decided to join cross country

takes her anger out in p.e.

gonta gokuhara

the kid with the kindest heart but suffering grades that the bullies love to target for some reason

does track and field

volunteers for so many organizations

he eats lunch in his favorite teacher's classroom

spends a lot of time studying but often cuts it short because he's so frustrated

angie yonaga

art club, art classes, lives and breathes art

always drawing during class and there are always people asking her to draw them

her art is always earning those rewards and being displayed throughout the school

friends with all the other art kids

kind of weird and accepts all the other weirdos of the school

the one kid that gifts drawings to their teacher that they hang up around the classroom

miu iruma

slacks off during group projects and in p.e.

just as unfunny as "the boys" of the class but no one cares because she's a girl

no one has ever told her to shut up

is in robotics competitively

makes fun of theatre and band kids

ryoma hoshi

everyone calls him emo (even though he is literally not) because he keeps to himself and wears dark colors

on the tennis team but doesn't really participate in any other school activities

wears his tennis jacket to school 24/7

gets lowkey bullied but always gets cold, quiet revenge rather than fighting back

kirumi tojo

always making conversation with the teachers and hanging out with them even though she has plenty of student friends

cleans up after everyone

is in student government

never ever dresses comfortably, always shows up to school dressed up

korekiyo shinguuji

the weird kid

everyone makes fun of him because he still wears a mask years after the covid pandemic ended

is on the quiz bowl team (100%)

model student and in the honors society

teachers dread him because he raises his hand just to add info to the teachers lecture either to correct them or because he thinks people want to know

tenko chabashira

fucking tryhard in p.e.

track and field

biggest school spirit at every rally

always yelling at the boys who mess around in class

is part of the GSA and acts aggressively gay whenever homophobes are around

[ofbreathandflame-archive]

Here's my thing: Why join (or continually contribute) a fandom with an author who is known to be racist -- that is racist by your own admission -- and then get mad when other people continually talk about those problems?

I'm not even saying fandoms can't reclaim and participate in fandoms with irksome authors -- I'm saying that when you're in those fandoms and you seem irritable at those critiques then there are some ideological problems there. I like ASOIAF but I live for the scathing anti-criques because they're absolutely right. I scroll through like yep, yep, yep. It never bothers me, not even a little. That's for every fandom I participate in. Because racism is never just an irksome problem, it should never get on your nerves, and I could talk about it all day. Because when you look at the world through the lens of a black woman (and other women of color ofc) you are NEVER not going to see it. I like TVD but there was so much shit one dealt with, that we had to actively ignore for the sake of being able to enjoy the show. I really wish I could ignore it all, but sorry not sorry.

I feel like a lot of people like to make their annual post about SJM's racism, and then don't want to consider two things (1) that the racism isn't actually isolated and permeates throughout all of her works and (2) there are consequences (or at least there should be) to being racist. Even if you have somehow come to terms with the racism in the story, that doesn't mean other people will or have to. The only way we even begin to solve the problem is by continually talking about it. It's just very crazy, IMO, to say that we are allowed to be upset -- but not in a way that disrupts your fandom experiences. That little irritation you feel every time a new post hits the anti-tag is racism. That little irritation you feel every time someone brings up Nehemia and the problems in Throne of Glass -- is also racism. I may be over the character conversation, but I'm not over the ones like these that have real consequences in the world of literature. It's just very frustrating to see people turn criticism of SJM's writing into a misogyny problem when the majority of the people doing the criticism are women of color.

LIKE -- are we supposed to talk about the racism once every blue moon for kudos points and then go back to pretending it doesn't exist? What are we gaining with that approach quickly?

The anti-anti sentiment is tired, and much more representative of people's unwillingness to address the problems than anything else. Like y'all are asking a group of people to....sympathize with someone who doesn't see her black readers as human enough to live on the page/?? Human enough to be represented as actual, complex human beings -- it don't sound wild to y'all? I'm pro anti for any racist author who crawls up the depths into the light of the publishing industry.

We complained about Nehemia and not only were we met with silence -- she did it AGAIN. And then stuck the remaining mixed race women with the man the story thought needed to be redeemed, with the main whose people enslaved her own -- and then the next black women we met come in the form of servents, and then the next black women as jealousy fodder, and then the next black women is brutally murdered, debased -- and I think has her head shaved, and that was FOR HELPING the main character. Then the next black woman is sidelined for the villainous, blonde-haired sister who got all of two words in the first book of CC. Lack of diversity is bad, but not inherently racist -- rather a symptom of white privilege. I wouldn't fret about it. Conscious, negative, and continuous bad representation is another thing entirely.

Anywho may the anti-community continue to thrive for this and any other racist author ❤️

[sarucane]

Stories within Stories (within more stories!): OFMD Meta Analysis of Ep 1 E4

This is the first episode where we get to really meet Ed, and the episode with Stede's backstory. It starts with a story within a story: a flashback to Stede's life with Mary and his family. We learn that Stede's life until he ran away on the Revenge was a told entirely by other people. His father dictated his early life to him, and then Mary--though she really was trying to tell a story with him--ended up telling a story to him.

This, we learn--and Ed begins to figure out--is the story within the story of the "gentleman pirate." The stories are linked by piracy, and betrayal. Stede remembers his daughter pretending to stab him despite his protestations that he "had a family," remembers that he got here by betraying his family's trust. He was telling a story, "playing pirates," and he got betrayed to the Spaniards.

Stede set out to live a life that is more authentic, more himself, by becoming a pirate. That's a brave thing to do, but Stede calls himself "a coward" as he remembers the family he left behind. He paradoxically believes both of the stories--that he's the Gentleman Pirate (however bad a pirate he actually is) and that he's "a lily-livered little rich boy--and neither, at the same time. But though Stede fears this contradiction damns him (literally), it's also what's saved him, what's drawn Ed to him.

Ed knows the story of himself "Blackbeard" doesn't fit him, just like neither of Stede's stories quite fit. And Stede isn't just focusing on telling one story: he's trying to combine the person he was with the person he wants to be, the gentleman with the pirate. That gives Ed space to start trying something really different, not just apparently different. To look inward in a way he probably never has before.

At first, it seems that Ed's inner and outer stories are aligned. All through the episode, Ed acts erratically towards Izzy and the crew. But--aside from what he does with Stede--none of his apparent whims are actual whims. They're all part of a plan supporting that "outer story." Ed's following the rules the whole time. Izzy's nagging him all through the episode to come up with a plan, but they're already in a plan that Izzy has unwittingly participated in earlier.

But when Stede asks Ed if he works for Blackbeard, Ed seizes the chance to follow a different kind of whim. An impulse that speaks to his inner self, his inner story and his desire to write it. And it's something that surprises Ed himself. It's true that he's been unhappy, he's likely already plotting to murder Stede and steal his identity--but this "I'm Ed" is something new.

And it's not a clear-cut division. Ed doesn't hide that he's Blackbeard from Stede, as soon as it comes up in the conversation he owns the name. Yet, when Stede and Ed are alone together, Ed is noticeably more relaxed, more open to new experiences. To writing something genuinely different. To acting on whims and impulses that speak to his inner story of "Ed," not his outer story of "Blackbeard."

And Ed's able to truly articulate his frustration to Stede, more than he did to Izzy (who kept trying to focus Ed's attention back on the outer story, life and death and piracy). Ed's trapped in a persona that looks larger-than-life but that he's experiencing as smaller than life. Like Izzy says much, much later, Ed's outgrown being Blackbeard.

And Ed can talk to Stede like this because Stede breaks the rules. Stede doesn't have a clean division between his inner and outer story. And he offers Ed the first chance Ed has had in a long time to literally "just be Ed." To have the self he wants to see, the story that feels real, reflected back at him through another person. To link up his inner and outer stories.

Ed clearly loves it. He loves looking at Stede's stuff and hearing Stede's stories. And he decides to take it up to 11, and to use his Blackbeard persona to make everyone call him "Stede." To try to be Stede, who is so much more free than him.

It's misguided. Aside from the bigger picture that being someone else isn't going to make Ed happy (wherever you go, there you are), Ed's so isolated within his outer story (which has happened because of his own choices, like he's trying to escape the Blackbeard story by sneaking out the back) that he lost track of the date. And he kept his plan secret until he thought it had already succeeded, which nearly gets everyone killed.

But it doesn't get killed, because of Ed and Stede. Because when Ed feels vulnerable, he goes into Stede's room and is alone with him. Because Stede looks at a memory of his old life and is open about it, open about a deep insecurity with a man he's barely met. And because Ed is still Ed, and still knows the rules of the sea. Together with the crew, they tell a story of a lighthouse. Link inner and outer stories and make a safe space ship. They tell a story together.

But while Stede was ready to leave his life behind, to break rules, Ed isn't ready to let go of his old stories yet. He could have found another reason to stick around with Stede, to tell stories with him because they enjoy it. Instead, he proposes a defined story to Stede: I'll teach you about being a pirate, you teach me about being an aristocrat. It's just a new outer story, but it's one with space for the real inner story--"It's the most fun I've had at sea in ages"--to grow.

Except that sometimes the outer stories crush the inner ones.

Mary and Izzy are the real antagonists of this episode. Both are occupied with trying to get Stede and Ed to stay in the bounds of their societally dictated stories. Mary does this with more ambivalence than Izzy, but Izzy actually does it with more generosity than Mary. He doesn't tell Ed to stop being weird. But he also pointedly ignores Ed's weirdness, further isolating Ed. And he turns to shame as a weapon when Ed has too much fun, challenges Izzy's ideas of the world too much. But the real problem is that in this episode, we see that Izzy allows Ed to do something that's bad for him: to keep telling the story of Blackbeard, even when he doesn't really want to. Izzy's been doing that for years, thinking he was doing something "right." But really, Izzy's been trapping them both.

And the thing about fucked-up toxic dynamics like the one that grew between Ed and Izzy--and the one that lingers between Stede and Mary--is that both parties become complicit. Stede left Mary, but he's wracked by guilt that will drive him to make terrible mistakes. And Ed, rather than letting Izzy leaves, proves that he's "still got it." The inner story he's been telling with Stede, Ed suggests, is all lies. Ed's still a pirate. He's using Stede, making another Blackbeard secret-clever-plan. This is all in service to an outer story.

But there's hope within the hopelessness. Ed's outer story is an escape route: he doesn't want to "have it," as Izzy said, and he's found a way to own that. He's failing in the right direction. And not just in terms of shaping a new life for himself. As Ed walks away, we see that Ed knows this isn't who he really is. That this outer story of Blackbeard isn't a story that overwrites all the others. That his heart isn't really empty, no matter how he might want it to be.

[jenny-from-the-bau]

Have you considered that the reason Emily mirrors people so much is that after spending so long undercover and shoving down Emily so she could realistically be Lauren, that she has forgotten exactly who Emily is, and that it’s not until she’s with the BAU that she’s able to rediscover who she is, who she wants to be, what she actually likes, etc?

While I understand the importance of Lauren, I feel like an undue weight is given to her undercover mission. It's because of her ability to mirror that she's able to be Lauren so convincingly. Throughout the series, we see Emily struggle to cope with what she's done as Lauren and what she knows she's capable of doing again, which leads me to believe that she was in her own mind during her mission and not disassociating to the point of being another person.

Emily uses her experience as a mirror to reflect what Doyle wants to see and gain his confidence through that. She doesn't entirely disappear as a person. The fact that she feels guilty for her actions and takes responsibility of Declan shows that she sees herself as bring present during that time, which adds more depth to her character overall. If she could just write off her behavior as being someone else (Lauren), then she wouldn't have to grapple with that darkness inside herself.

She was also acting as a mirror well before going undercover. I think Emily has two sides - the goth girl who wears a costume, gets pregnant, tells her boss to fuck off and the well-mannered Ambassador's daughter who knows exactly what to say to passing Senators, knows how to behave to win friends, compartmentalizes perfectly. She has always molded her identity to fit the situation she's in.

Although, even her devil may care attitude is a mirror. She greets the Senator, asks about her kids, promises to pass a hello to her mother and then goes into Hotch's office and says she hates politics and would never participate. She's the perfect ambassador's daughter for the senator and then plays perfectly for Hotch. He wants to see an agent who cares more about integrity than her job and that's what Emily gives him.

She has sex as a teenager and gets pregnant and says fuck the rules, but she does it because she knows what teenage boys want. She wants to stay friends with Johnny, so she has sex with him and it leads to pregnancy. At the same time she's throwing care to the wind, she's reflecting what the people around her want her to be.

She goes on a date in The Big Game and mentions her interest and calls the date ruined. Either she's overthinking her performance, or she was trying to be a specific image for her date, and the reference was out of character. Even when she talks to Derek, she's mirroring his behavior. A big goofy smile, quoting lines back at him, acting impressed that he knows the book. She's realized that her earlier mistake can be a boon in this conversation. He's also the one to ask if she's okay, and she chooses to return the same energy by telling him. It may be a moment of opening up, but it also gains her favor and helps her integrate into the team.

Have you considered that Emily Prentiss is a mosaic of mirrors, and she always plays a part because she knows she could shatter at any moment?

[twistedastrology]

Hello there!

Can you talk more about aries mercury? so...not the fool card? Even though they don't "think things through" before speaking? It seems to me aries in mercury is either over-emotional, too forward, too logical, too passionate and so many contradictory things all at once. I would REALLY love to hear what you think about that. Please.

Btw, Capricorn Mercury seems to be the most 'useful' mercury in terms of external/social benefits, in the sense that they have a constant filter that makes them gain respect by others easily. I don't necessarily like their minds to be honest, and they're generally not interested in lots of topics but I have to recognise how handy it could come to people who don't get to wish to discuss/delve deeper in various topics.

I have multiple cap mercuries in my life btw including friends, colleagues and my dear mother with whom--even though she's a Gemini Moon--barely manages to have hobbies of her own or participate in games.

I feel like cap mercury is perfect on the outside, but overly influenced by society's standards, rules and appearance on the inside bc of that filter. Like they don't really "think for themselves"? They're much more focused on appearances than on the content of a text, speech and mercury matters.

Sorry for the ramble. Also, discovered ur blog today and I love the authenticity.

A;

love love love love LOOOOOVE this ask thank u so so much omg- mercury stuff is one of my absolute favorite things to yap abt in astrology and i consider it kinda my specialty bc im mercury dominant myself so 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

let's start with aries mercury- in my experience, people with aries mercury aren't necessarily impulsive when it comes to their thoughts or how they talk, unless the rest of the chart says otherwise (mercury square mars especially could do this imo)

my mom has her mercury in 25° aries (so an aries degree) and she's like 99% fire with a cap rising that doesn't do a whole lot bc it's SUUUUUPER intercepted by aquarius- Like literally her whole 1st house is engulfed by aquarius but her asc line is in cap so 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

she's the perfect example of an aries mercury in my opinion- she literally Cannot sit still for longer than like. an hour at best. even my gemini finds it slightly annoying but i just follow her around whenever we're talking 😭😭😭

she also has her sun and venus both in aries (venus conjunct mercury) so she's very aries dominant, and she's not very confrontational or impulsive at all- she's not really quick to anger either like stereotypical aries is, but she is pretty easily irritated id say 😵‍💫

in terms of mercury specifically, you can just See the aries influence in like everything she does- her organization isn't the neatest, but she has to have everything put away otherwise she'll lose her mind and she literally can't focus until the kitchen is clean or something-

her mercury goes a MILE a minute just like mine does so in talking to her, we can go from something very normal to the most out of nowhere conversation you could ever imagine- And we have mercury sextile mercury together (albeit a wide orb bc my mercury is 1° gemini 😵‍💫) so somehow we understand the other's chaos perfectly and actually manage to reel the other in without actually doing anything-

shockingly, where my gemini will get incredibly confused and overwhelmed, her aries will come in clutch- a good example of this is a while ago we were playing fallout 76 and if u dont know, in that game u have a stash box with limited storage capacity and it's inevitable that it'll fill up eventually so u have to get rid of a whole bunch of stuff to bring it back down-

i literally got so overwhelmed by that to the point of tears and my dad tried to help (his mercury is in taurus btw) and he literally couldn't bc i refused to open up to him tbh- so he went and got my mom and just her Being in the same Room with me got my mercury to sort its shit out- like she saw everything so clearly and directly, very aries, whereas i was overwhelmed by all the details, very gemini.

so i think aries mercury is actually a Really good placement especially if you have strong aspects to back it up- it can make you see complicated things very simply and clearly OR the opposite sometimes 😵‍💫 it Can make you overlook details and not understand something when it isn't perfectly direct- and i also notice that, at least with my mom, her aries mercury makes her a Little less good with people- only because a lot of people aren't as clear and concise as she would like them to be, and that's when i have to help her figure out what they mean 😭

i think aries mercuries do actually think things through before they speak, they just think so fast that it Seems like they don't- similar to gemini mercuries actually 😵‍💫

i also dont think they're overly emotional or hot-headed as per the aries stereotypes- i think they're actually a lot more calculated than we give them credit for especially since mars is the god of war, and to win a war you need strategy (personally i think aries rules the sun, but mars makes sense here so 😮‍💨)

ANYWYA in terms of CAPRICORN!!!!!

i have observed quite a few capricorn mercuries so i am extremely glad u brought them up-

i think what u said abt capricorn mercuries being the most useful in terms of social benefits is actually kinda real- i do notice that Most capricorn mercuries are similar to libra mercuries in that they are generally very respectful of the things they talk about, at least if they actually respect them 😵‍💫

i have 3 different capricorn mercuries that im using as examples in my head right now- jonathan davis, awsten knight and bill wurtz- if you've seen any of them in interviews, you'll notice they're all very different with the way they talk but i think jonathan davis and awsten knight are the most similar in the respect thing-

those two are both so charismatic and polite in my opinion- and bill wurtz is too but he's a lot more like what you would think an aries mercury would be like- he's very high-strung, at least in the interview i saw, and has a lot of nervous energy and talks So Fast and yet it still seems like his mouth cant keep up with his brain-

awsten is pretty similar, he's got adhd (same 😵‍💫) and talks pretty fast but his pace seems a little closer to a gemini mercury. it's slightly slower most of the time but the speed at which he talks and thinks seems to vary based on what he's talking about.

jonathan is very cap coded to me with the way he talks, and im silly for him rn so i have done extensive research 💔💔💔 But he seems very methodical, yet playful with how he talks and thinks- methodical but you can tell his brain is fully capable of that uranus level speed at the same time 😭😭😭

i think overall cap mercuries absolutely depend on the rest of the chart bc if u saw my beef with earth signs post (or newsletter!!), u'll have seen where i said earth placements are outlines waiting to be colored in by the rest of the chart-

so if someone has too many earth placements or like- a taurus-influenced cap mercury, i can Absolutely see how they could be someone who doesn't seem to think for themselves, or even thinks too Much about themselves-

i also think the smaller range of interests could actually make sense for a cap mercury because saturn is very much about mastery, so the mercury, unless influenced by another element that says otherwise, would hyperfixate on one thing until it masters it instead of a gemini or aries mercury which is more jack of all trades.

i hope this made sense and again thank u soooooo so much for this ask i really enjoyed this topic and if u have any other questions please feel free to send me them!!!!! i love when ppl send me questions it makes me rly happy 😭😭😭😭