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Yandere! Slasher Hcs
Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Yandere Thoughts, Bad Writing, Stalking, Possessive Behavior, Reader is Referred as ‘You’
🌟 Yandere! Slasher has been stalking you the minute you moved into his town. Imagine his surprise when he learns that you’ll be attending the same school as him! This must be fate telling him that you’re the one and to get with you quickly! He’s already planning his future with you. From where your wedding will be, how the names of your kids, how many pets the two of you would own. Everything you can think of, he’s already panned it.
🌟 Yandere! Slasher is so socially awkward around you. Whenever you speak to him his knees start shaking and he’s tripping over his words. Just a bundle of nerves and can’t think whenever he’s around you. You probably don’t even notice him or remember him most of the time but whenever you greet him he can basically feel his heart leap out of his chest.
🌟 Yandere! Slasher loves to give you presents and his love language is definitely gift giving. It’s not the normal gift giving though, it’s more of a “Wow look at what my cat gave me” type of gift giving. His “presents” are hit or miss though. They’re either extremely good presents like a stolen gold watch or extremely crappy like a dead bird. It’s very interesting to say the least.
🌟 Yandere! Slasher loves killing people for both the thrill and fun of it. He likes to pick off your friends one by one and watch their faces curl up in fear. Desperately watch you to be isolated from social interaction so that he can observe you without the fear of losing you to someone else. It’s gotten so bad that almost everyone believes that you're the killer since all of your friends end up missing or dead.
🌟 Yandere! Slasher would swoop and clear your name in hopes of looking like a hero in your eyes. When you are eventually cleared from all allegations, he’s the only person that you're actually actively interacting with. Even though he’s gotten closer to you, he still feels all giddy inside and clumsy.
🌟 Yandere! Slasher is the type of person to just steal your trash. Remember that fork you threw away? Well that’s his now. Remember that empty water bottle? It’s his new refillable water bottle. What about that napkin you threw away yesterday? Well, it’s at his house next to his bed. That man will literally be on his hands and knees digging out of the trash to find whatever thing that you threw away.
🌟 Yandere! Slasher is so down bad that he has his own fake mini you plushie that he sleeps with every night. And yes made that plush himself. He literally salivates at the idea of sleeping on a bed with you. Literally wants to be with you so bad. He gets increasingly annoyed whenever he’s not around you or has his sights on you.
🌟 Yandere! Slasher would definitely kidnap or abduct you one day. He’d basically do it in his signature serial killer costume. Yandere! Slasher would prefer it if you had a group with you during this. He just loves the chase and it makes everything so exciting. Loves the idea of you slowly starting to panic as everyone disappears one at a time. It has him jumping for joy.
—
Things were looking terrible for both you and your group. The murder was still after you relentlessly and wouldn’t give up no matter what. Everything was looking so dim. None of you were able to call the police for some odd reason, it felt like someone was jamming the internet. Nothing was working but a singular phone that could only be used to text messages to a singular unknown phone number. This was your current predicament, trying to strike a deal with a psycho killer for your lives.
Random side character: (trembling) while sending a message “Please let us go we’ll give you anything”
Originally, you all didn't have much hope, but what you all didn't expect the killer to reply so quickly.
Yandere! Slasher: “Anything is fine?”
Random side character: (trembling) “As long as you let us go, we’ll do our best to help you fulfill your wish.”
Yandere! Slasher: “I want the cutie standing over there to be my spouse. Specifically the one that has [describes your appearance]
Everyone : "????"
You: “What the fuck—“
Before anyone could react, the opposite side began to send messages quickly. You couldn’t believe that it was possible for someone to type this proficiently. It was like the other person wasn’t even typing at all. Their typing skills were faster than a normal person talking. If your life weren’t in danger right now you’d be applauding.
Yandere! Slasher: “I am a male, 6’6, and have no bad habits. I have been ranked first academically since I was a child. I was admitted to multiple Ivy League Universities with excellent scores. At present, I have not killed anyone in the last 24 hours. I am very kind. My family is very rich and I can provide you with a happy life. I will do all the housework after marriage. I will do all the laundry, cook, and clean the house. I can hand over all my salary to you. I will never quarrel with you, and I also guarantee that I will only love my spouse in my entire lifetime. This is my photo.”
After this sentence, more than a dozen photos were sent from the opposite side. Different backgrounds, different angles, and different clothes. The only thing the photos had in common was that they were carefully photographed. It was obvious that the photographer was working hard to get his good side.
Yandere! Slasher: “If you don’t like my appearance, I can always get plastic surgery. If it’s my gender you have an issue with, then it's not impossible to become a woman.”
All eyes were on you right now and the only thing you could say at that minute was,
“…. What the hell?”
Pt. 2
#yandere#yandere headcanons#yandere imagines#yandere x y/n#yandere x you#yandere scenarios#yandere x darling#yandere x reader#male yandere#yandere oc#yandere slasher
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A very ridiculously long rant of my SMG4 and Mr. Puzzles Theory's (it's long;-;)
Has anyone ever thought its weird how Smg4 is PERFECTLY NORMAL the Saturday after IGBP!?! like Bro just got done being mentally insane like literally a few days ago and he's just like mentally FINE after all that!?? Nuh Uh- Aint no way- Smg4's probably still coo coo crazy a bit or a lot cuz yalls not gonna be chill after all that far as i know thats not how human minds work. >:/
In SMG4 doesn't meme for one second he's hardcore creepy vibes, ofc more memey ofc which is funny- (Bald Smg4💀) but still sinister none the less :0
then ofc him saying "time to come up with the PERFECT video" in SMG4 simulator then ofc im like NOO :C DOnt gO eVil again and idk do some crazy crap with mr. puzzles and make ur perfect video- amd go all evil- evan tho its cool and eerie-NO :C
Then smg4s really creepy/scarry coocoo cazy vibes in the MEME Factory. Cannon smg4 did actually have an effect on our poor meme boi like bro lost some of his sanity has Mr. Puzzles trauma and now is more antagonistic- which Mr. Puzzles said he makes a good villian Whitch he does in a creepy funny memey way witch is great! and sort of a plot twist cuz smg4 is all cute and bubbly and sweet then he goes all >:000 >:) Creepy and sinister is awsome! it would be cool to see Smg4 as a main antagonest for an arc although we got IGBP so its GREATTT!! AAAAAAAA-
I also sorta feel like Mr. Puzzles is like Smg4 but like: What if smg4 never had any freinds? so he like sorta obsesses and rellys on The TV and makeing entertainment so they dont feel alone or have some sort of purpose. Smg4 and Puzzles are really similar in a way just took a small but major path. Smg4: had freinds his whole life, like a main roll purpose (hes a frickin meme guardian!!!!!! >:D) home and ofc his youtube and whatever chaos happens in this world. Mr Puzzles: never had freinds, probably had crap parents and school bullys, (ISTG HE PRoBably made/re-created little shows with like socks pupets as a kid- AAAA_) anyway- Puzzles sorta just watched TV to comfert him and sorta be his 'freind' in a way which probably ended up inpireing him to proove himself as an actress and become fameous weather to proove the world hes good enough or loved or himself. (Poor Mr.Puzzke wuzzle :'c) So anyway Smg4 and puzzles are like opisites of what they have but similar.
(Mr. Puzzles Headcannon Back story time B) since i wanna type today ;-; ) So ive sotta headcannon mr puzzles childhood suck like- bro had no freinds crappy/neglectfull parents and overall a shit life back then like i sort of immagine his mom being like "shoo im buisy go watch TV or smthn" while on the phone or something idk sad sappy stuff- so little Winston Puzzles (if you have MR theres a first name so puzzles is last name, ITS WINSTON PUZZLES-) aNyWAYy- so puzzles just watched TV ALL. DAY. and probably went to school got bullyed for whatever reason :/ so the beginning basics of the story +Context dElUxE- when mr puzzles got older he bought the showgrounds (whitch in cannon used to be a circus/carnaval) so mr puzzles ran a carnaval place and did some sort of shows + amusement park stuff prbably for like a few years or a couple decades untul money came a problem or went out of buisness, (he still has his face btw lol) so he eventually closed the place and sorta abandoned it and probably the *iNteRnEt* was probably becomeing a thing by now (TV MAN OLDDD-) so he probably doom binges EVERYTHING on youtube in some apartment and works at MC deez or something- idk mOnEyY :/ eventualy yalls probably up at 5am waching Si-fi and stuff with robots get the idea of being a cyborg ither googleing 'hOw tO bE a cYborG EASY" on youtube like a maryos Plane Trip thing AKA Smg4 logic LMAO and probably winging it and then getting his SUppeR fAbulus and Iconic TV head and nows hes probably immortal now :/ (he was probably an old man by the time he finnisghed the body lol not to mention prototypes :/) then he probably did some evil villian laughter shit then downloadded the internet in his brain then eventualy selling the showgrounds to SMG4 and the rest of Puzzlevision continues :/
If yall read all that- WOW :/ its 1am and im typeing esays ;-; anyways this has been cooking in my brain for too long so now its all here now :/
*fades into the distance MEME STYLE B3*
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Ooooh is love to hear more about Daphne! Does she have a favourite book or film? Is she more girly or tomboy or both? Milkshakes or floats? Just anything! 💕
Ackkk! Thank you so much my dear!!!
Before she met the Losers’ Club, I would like to think that Daphne would find any reason to visit the library for a good read. If she could find any excuse to stay in without having to leave her room, she would. I think she would like something along the lines of Lord of the Rings because she has quite the imagination and she is a bit of a geek with her favorite and only film series being Star Wars. She is also a fan of the classics because her mother was an English major in college and occasionally cracks open her books whenever she misses her a little extra (her mother is in and out of the hospital).
I would have to say that after meeting the boys, she definitely becomes a tomboy, but she still retains a girly side. She is very meek and shy prior to meeting the group, but after they accept her for just being her, she begins to break out of her bubble. Her favorite thing to do growing up is mess with Richie because he would always talk about his mad flirting skills and she would enjoy watching him get nervous around her when she flirted back. She doesn’t know about Richie’s secret, but only when she finds out years later does she apologize for her actions.
Definitely a milkshake person. She and Richie share the same preference of a Snickers milkshake. Daphne would prefer drinking her ice cream and soda separate; huge Cookies n’ Cream and Dr. Pepper lover. I would like to think she matches with Bill on ice cream and Beverly on soda.
Daphne also has a huge crush on Stanley Uris when they were younger and they could’ve progressed, but he was too traumatized with the events to think about anything else. Believe it or not, Richie will be Daphne’s first and last kiss during her years in Derry ;DDDD
#Ask Gracy Anything#susiesamurai#OC: Daphne McConnell#It#It: Chapter 2#It OC#Literally typing this at work with our crappy internet
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Corpse’s Girl
Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)
Warnings: Bullying, Swearing, Derogatory Terms
Genre: Angst, Fluff
Summary: Y/N’s life as a regular college student is forever stripped away from her when her relationship with the famous YouTuber Corpse Husband is accidentally revealed during an online class of hers. How will she cope with the sudden spotlight and the unwanted attention, some of which crosses into bullying?
Requested by my amazing Tumblr friend @itsminniekat 🥰 She’s been reading and liking my works since day one and I honestly couldn’t be more grateful. If you’re reading this, all I can say is thank you, darling. Thank you so much for sticking by my blog even when I posted some crappy fics. I’ll make sure this ain’t one of them. Love you with all my heart. ❤❤❤
P.S. - I named the mean character with my name so I hope no one who reads this has the same name. Wouldn’t want any of you feeling like the villain 😘
Who knew online class would be even more boring than being physically present for a lecture? Seriously, I find myself doing the weirdest of crap to entertain myself - like trying to balance a pen on the tip of my nose for example. I jot down some notes every now and then but that’s basically it. My mind can not fathom the concept on concentrating on whatever my professors are going on and on about. Well, full disclosure, I couldn’t concentrate even if I wanted to, especially with my boyfriend streaming in the other room.
He’s currently playing Among Us with his usual gaming squad. Listening to his input during the discussions, I can always tell when he’s lying. I honestly find it hilarious that his friends can’t pick up when he’s bullshitting them. I sometimes wonder if he has brainwashed them. And that’s one of the main reasons we don’t play Among Us together - he can’t lie to me. Not only do I pick up on his con with ease, but he always says he feels bad when he lies to me which is just the sweetest thing. Also, I refuse to play cause I’m shy. His friends are all well-known content creators and I’m a literal nobody. Every now and then I find myself wondering why Corpse is even with me. He’s always quick to push those thoughts out of my head and make sure they don’t return on a long notice, but they do interrupt my peace from time to time.
“Y/N, do you know?“ The sound of my professor saying my name takes me out of my eavesdropping of Corpse’s stream.
I panic, but quickly improvise, “Sorry, my internet is slow, you cut out for a second. What was the question?” I feel my face heating up, making me glad we are allowed to keep our cameras off.
“Question number 15 on page 82 in your textbook. Do you know the answer to it?“ My professor repeats himself, his tone annoyed.
I look down at the page that’s already opened in front of me. I let out a sigh of relief, seeing that the question is rather easy.
“Yeah, um, it’s...“ Suddenly, Corpse’s laugh reaches my room loud and clear. There’s no doubt my mic picked up the noise, especially since the door to my room is open.
The color drains from my face as I hurry to say the answer and remute myself. My eyes are wide as I stare at my screen, hoping no one will acknowledge that very recognizable laugh.
“OMG Y/N, are you watching a Corpse Husband stream in class?” One of the bitches in my class, Vy, speaks up, “Not a very goody-two-shoe move on your part, dear.”
I purposely unmute my mic to mumble a quick ‘Shut up, bitch’ that somehow manages to fly under my professor’s radar and the class continues. It’s the first time something like this has happened and I’m not sure if I handled it properly or not.
The class ends shortly after, allowing me a sigh of relief as I disconnect from the meeting.
“Fucking finally.“ I mumble to myself, leaning back in my desk chair. Tilting my head backwards, I see Corpse standing in the doorframe. I grin, not only because his presence itself makes me ten times happier, but also because he’s upside down from my viewpoint. “Well, hello there! How long have you been spying on me?“
He struts over to me, leaning his face over mine, “Long enough.” His lips linger above mine without any actual contact before he pulls away, allowing me to sit up straight and proper in the chair. “You still have classes?”
I nod my head while disappointedly rolling my eyes, “Yeah. One more. Shouldn’t be too bad since it’s English Lit. You’re done streaming?”
“Yeah, I just have some other things to do. I haven’t done a narration video in a while, I miss making that type of content.“ He plops down on my bed, running a hand through his messy black curls.
“Weren’t you recording some lines a few days ago?“ I frown as I try to recall if what I’m referring to actually happened or my brain is too fried to decipher reality from my bootleg perception of it. Online class, man - messes with your head like sleeping pills - makes you disoriented and exhausted with barely doing anything other than trying to wrap your brain around a lecture or two.
He hums affirmatively, “It’s not a finished project and I don’t even know if I’ll use those or rerecord them. I’ll have to listen to them again before I make a final decision.“
I tilt his chin upwards with my pointer finger, a gesture he has told me he finds very endearing, “I’m sure they’re great and you just refuse to be satisfied. Everything you do is great.“
He smiles a small, shy smile, his fingers gently wrapping around my wrist, holding my hand in place, “You’re biased. You like me too much to tell me when I do some bullshit.”
I scoff, “You know that isn’t true. If someone’s gonna kick your butt in formation, it’s gonna be me.“ I give him a quick kiss on the forehead before pulling away from him, “Go on, now. I have a class to attend. You distract me enough while you’re in the other room, I can only imagine how hard it’d be for me to focus if you were right by my side.“
He smirks, bowing a little as he makes his way out of the room, “You flatter me.”
I playfully roll my eyes, getting my headset back on as I tap the last class for the day. We have an assignment due to the start of the class which we’ll have to present if the professor approved of it. We basically had to write a psychoanalysis of a character from any book of our choice. I chose Heathcliff from ‘Wuthering Heights’ which is one of my favorite books of all time. I’m proud of what I wrote and the way I wrote it, but I’ve always barely scraped by with a B in this class, a B+ if I’m lucky, so I’ve never gotten any major credit, even when I put my 110% in the assignments and projects.
Well, color me surprised when the professor calls on me first to read my work, complimenting it on its detailed and specific nature. I get my printed assignment out in front of me and unmute myself.
“I wrote a psychoanalysis on for Heathcliff, a character from Emily Bronte’s novel ‘Wuthering Heights’.“ Just after I say this line, Corpse’s voice booms throughout the whole apartment, no doubt being picked up by my mic. It doesn’t sound like he’s actually talking, he can’t be that loud. I put two and two together when I recognize the lines he’s saying - the ones he recorded a few days ago. They’re coming from his computer speakers. He probably didn’t check the volume before playing back the recording.
I mute myself as quickly as possible, but it’s too late. The voice dies down as Corpse probably turned down the speakers.
My professor, who is already done with this lecture, just annoyedly remarks, her words overdosed with sarcasm: “Read your assignment and you can go back to whatever it is you are watching.”
“Wow, Y/N! Again?! Are you one of those crazy obsessed fans or something? Is Corpse Husband all you watch?“ This bitch is really poking a stick at me, huh? The only crazy obsessed fan here is her, and my friends but they are allowed. Little do all of them know, I am obsessed but not simply over a YouTuber. I’m obsessed with my boyfriend who just happens to be a YouTuber.
“No commentary, please.“ The professor scolds her, “Go on, Y/N.“
I finish reading without any other disturbances. The professor compliments my essay again when I’m done, the small incident at the beginning forgotten already. Well, not by everyone. One of my friends shot me a quick text to joke about it which only earned an eye roll from me.
My friends don’t know that I’m dating Corpse either. As I said, they are simping HARD over him while I act the most indifferent on the subject. Whenever they ask my opinion on him I either say ‘he’s OK’ or just avoid answering completely. I know saying anything more enthusiastic than that would turn into a snowball rolling down a snowy hill - I’d just keep babbling about how nice, amazing, wonderful and a gift to this world Corpse is, inevitably revealing our relationship in the process.
I’m afraid of revealing my relationship with Corpse in front of these people. They are all run on jealousy and selfishness and I can only imagine how mean they’d be about it. I’m already not too fond of them, it would only be worse if any of my personal life was exposed.
When the class finally ends I remove my headset, putting my forehead down on the desk, barely missing the keyboard. I groan in frustration and anger at myself for not fighting back. I could’ve and should’ve said something - ANYTHING. But what? That’s a question I can’t find the answer to.
“Hey...“ Corpse’s hesitant voice comes from behind me, “You ok?“
I straighten my posture, turning to him with a smile. “Yeah, but these people suck.”
I get up from my chair as he approaches me, basically falling in his arms. The comfort I feel radiating off of him makes me relax, forget the past hour or so. He has always had this effect on me. Like my own personal kryptonite to my anger and anxiety.
“Did I get you in any trouble because of that?“ His voice shows clear concern and guilt.
I wrap my arms around him tighter, burying my head in his chest. “No, don’t worry about it.“
And I really wasn’t in trouble. Not until now that the video is officially posted....
I can call these people dumb all I want but they sure put two and two together awfully fast. They recognized the lines they heard during class as the same ones from his new video that came out almost a week after the incident, aka two days ago. It’s safe to say I haven’t touched my phone or computer since.
“This is all my fault.“
Of all the horrible things I suspected would happen this has to be the worst - Corpse is blaming himself for it. I am prepared to take all the shit these people have to throw at me but seeing Corpse beating himself up over this is killing me. No amount of convincing can change his mind. Nothing I say helps.
“Please, stop doing this to yourself. Non of this is your fault, Corpse.“ I’ve repeated this sentence more than a thousand time these past forty eight hours, each time saying it more and more desperately.
“All of it is my fault, Y/N. I’m so sorry. I hate myself so much.“ Has been his reply single time.
I can’t watch him be so mean to himself. It’s the most conflicting thing when the person you love most is torturing themselves. It’s easy if it’s someone else doing it, you just kick their ass. But what are you supposed to do when the person you want to protect is the same one you need to protect them from.
Corpse has shut himself away in his recording room these past few hours and though he clearly needs to be alone, he still left the door open just a crack cause he knows I’ll be worried sick otherwise.
While I’m alone in the living room, I’ve finally managed to brace myself and build enough courage to power up my laptop. Last time it was on it was going mad with notifications.
“It’s digital. Only digital. It can’t hurt you too badly if it can’t touch you, right?“ I mumble to myself, already frustrated despite not having yet seen all the horrors that await me.
And horrors there were. Everywhere. Twitter. Instagram. Facebook.
My grades. Some pictures of me no one has ever seen. My school files. People from my class tweeting Corpse to ‘expose’ me for the ‘slut’ or ‘bitch’ I really am. Corpse hasn’t touched social media either and I plan on making sure it stays that way. God only knows how much worse he’ll get if he sees these claims.
And then, like a notification sent straight from hell, an email from my professor.
Practical lectures on Friday. Be here at 9 AM. Don’t forget your mask and gloves.
Good thing I opened my laptop when I did. Friday is tomorrow and I need to prepare for this day. Not only do I need to hit the books but I need to toughen up a bit. I can’t go there looking like I feel - like a mess.
Alright, time to put the brave face on. No more wallowing in it, at least not until tomorrow afternoon.
I make a study plan and hop in the shower. I feel the need to apologize to my hair for washing it so roughly, basically yanking at my strands from frustration that has been suppressed for too long.
I get our of the boiling hot shower, red as a lobster, and change into some clean comfortable clothes and put my ass in study mode. I remove all the scary expectations of the morning to come from my mind and let the information the textbooks has to offer seep into my brain.
* * *
I’m about to head out and, despite my put-together composure, I am a wreck inside. I actually put effort into my appearance, I mean - I even styled my hair. A pretty façade to hide a ruin.
I saw my friends’ texts last night, all three of them ending their friendship with me because they felt betrayed. I haven’t yet decided how to feel about that. Doesn’t matter at the moment, there are more important matters at hand, aka surviving the next three hours.
My college is within ten minutes walking distance from our apartment. That ten minute walk has never been so stressful, not even during exam season. The air feels a little harder to breathe, the path a little shorter to walk. And my moment of reckoning a little too close.
I feel eyes on me the second I start walking through the park of our campus. Sure, I could just be paranoid, but the feeling is too real to be just my imagination in overdrive. I’m glad I have my hair down and a mask on so the redness of my cheeks and neck isn’t on display. That’s a sign of weakness right now.
We have two an hour and a half long classes between which we have a snack break that’s half an hour. I usually enjoy that period but I’m dreading it now. These assholes can only be so mean in the presence of a professor, but during lunch break they can increase that tenfold.
“Well if it isn’t Corpse’s girl.“ I hear that a lot. The whispers are not so much whispers as intentionally loud enough for me to hear remarks. I’m not bothered by them, it’s the least they can do. If I let such a simple thing get to me, I’d be crumbling by the end of first period.
I hear some shuffling behind me and out of the corner of my eye I see, yeah you guessed it, THAT bitch. She’s standing as close to me as she can without violating Covid regulations. A mask is covering her face but the menacing look in her eyes tells me all I need to know about the interaction that’s about to go down.
“I’d ask how much he pays you for the hour.....“ her long nails tap the wooden desk, “but that’d be rude. I bet it’s tough being a maid. Do you just clean or are you a multipurpose lap dog? No offense, I’m genuinely curious.“
“Vy, would you be so kind as to give Y/N some room to breathe?“ The professor asks as he nonchalantly walks in.
Vy rolls her eyes, batting her eyelashes at me, “Talk to you later, sweetheart.” With a fake friendly wave she’s out of my hair, at least for now.
Remember what I said about these people not being as dumb as I pegged them to be? Yeah, scratch that. These fuckers actually tried getting away with taking pictures of me with flash in broad daylight. Like, HELLO! I have two functioning eyes and a brain, I’m onto you. Sadly, me having figured out their childish but hurtful methods of humiliating me doesn’t change much. They still posted the pics they took, using the most derogatory terms they could find in the English language, always making sure to tag Corpse and me both.
Needless to say, these were the longest three hours of my life.
* * *
Shutting the door to our apartment behind me causes relief of the highest levels. I feel like I’ve locked out all the bad shit I have had to deal with these past twenty four hours.
I’m tired. I’m fucking exhausted. I feel like a discarded piece of paper.
And it all starts crumbling. A wall is bound to start slowly falling apart after being hit over and over again, each time feeling the blows with a stronger intensity.
I slide down the door sitting down on the floor and slowly taking my shoes off. I put my bag beside me and wrap my arms around my knees, hiding my head in the space between them and my chest.
One tear slides down my cheek.
Another follows.
And another, this time accompanied by a choked sob.
A pair of arms wraps around the ball that my body has been shaped into. One of his hands comes up to stroke my hair gently, feeding me the comfort I have been longing for since I left the apartment this morning.
“I saw it. All of it. All the shit they talk about you. All the names they call you. And I’ve never wanted to beat so many people up simultaneously.“ His words make me raise my head from its low position, giving him a knowing look. “I wish I could. I would, but that would land me in jail. Which doesn’t even sound so bad cause I don’t like going out. Only problem is you wouldn’t be with me. I wouldn’t want you to be there with me, don’t get me wrong, I’d never want you to end up in jail. I-...” I cut him off by pressing my lips to his. A quick kiss that says so much but mainly shows the immeasurable gratitude for his support.
Seeing those awful tweets and comments had the complete opposite effect on him. He no longer blames himself but the people who actually deserve the blame - all those jerks from my college.
I pull away, giving him a small smile. “I would never let you go to jail.”
He smiles back at me, overjoyed that my mood is slowly being lifted, “Come on, I have a nice crowd that would like to meet you.”
I know exactly what he means. Felix, Sean, Rae, Dave, Sykkuno and the rest of his friends. The people I’ve been so shy and afraid to meet since day one. Being shy doesn’t really make sense now, seeing as how they know I exist and that I’m a part of Corpse’s life.
What do I have to lose?
“Guys, this is my girlfriend, Y/N.“ Corpse’s black avatar runs around my cyan one in the Among Us lobby.
I can’t help but giggle when I unmute my mic, “Hi everyone! It’s so nice to finally meet you.“ They each introduce themselves, expressing how happy they are to be meeting me too.
It’s the first time in what feels like a while that I’m truly having fun. These people are wonderful, each so unique and lovely. They never brought up the scandal nor acted as though they knew about it. I know they did and I am beyond grateful that they never mentioned it or treated me any differently because of it. Also, Corpse was streaming the whole time. I had my phone on his stream, my eyes nervously scanning the chat every now and then. I couldn’t believe it. Corpse’s real fans were just as wonderful as his friends - they were nothing but supportive and happy to have met me.
Now, I can either choose to believe these people were being so nice to me out of sympathy or I can believe they really like me and appreciate me for who I am and not for what happened to me.
I choose to believe the latter.
And while I’m still getting accustomed to this whole new spotlight, I know I’ll be able to handle it as long as I’m holding Corpse’s hand in the process. All I need is to have him beside me and I’m prepared to tackle anything.
“They love you.“ Corpse tells me once the stream is done and we’ve hopped out of the Discord call, “But I love you more.“
His arms wrap around my waist while mine instinctively find their way around his neck, “I love them, too. But they’re at the number 2 spot.”
He smirks at me, “I wonder who’s at number 1.”
I push up on my toes, putting my lips an inch away from his, “Hmm, I wonder...”
He doesn’t let me finish, silencing my teasing with a sweet, loving kiss.
@susceptible-but-siriusexual @simonsbluee @save-the-sky @hacker-ghost @bi-andready-tocry @imtiredaffff @jazzkaurtheglorious @hereforbeebo @fandomgirl17 @chrysanthykios @maehemscorpyus @loraleiix @letsloveimagines @annshit @i-cant-choose-a-username-help @enigmaticmaze @divine-artemis @waterlilypat
#corpse#corpse husband fanfic#corpse husband#husband#corpsehusband#corpse imagines#corpse simp#corpse x reader#corpse x y/n#corpse husband fanficiton#corpse husband x y/n#corpse husband x reader#corpse husband imagine#fluff#angst#romance#love#comfort#x reader#reader#reader insert#x y/n#y/n#requests open#requests
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Yo~
What's your opinion on the Will Byers DID theory? If you like it, which version do you like better? Both interpretations seem cool to me, though I personally like strangertheory's version better ^.^
Hi!
That's a very interesting question. I want to start by saying that I am a singlet, so I don't have DiD or OSDD. My knowledge of this condition is primarly known through medias I consume or some more "advanced" psychiatric documents or researches.
DiD is a condition that hasn't been always best represented or accurately represented since this condition varies from people who have it and so while there are similarities, the experience of it is very much unique and personal. It is also something that in a fictional setting with different genres, themes and tones is very hard to pull off or represent unless you go for the very realistic take on it.
It is bound to be, like many other things in fiction, dramatized. And speaking from a singlet perspective, who also had particular problems represented in fiction, I think it's okay as long as it's done right, in the setting, tone and genre it is in.
For example, we have today a lot more LGBTQ+ representation and like everything, unless you go for the fully realistic route, it's going to be simplified and dramatized. There's so many gender identities and sexual orientations today, you have to simplify it. And that goes for many other things that people care about in media, it has to be done right, but the writers still have a story to tell and unless that subject is the focus of the story, they're not gonna always spend their time talking about that. There is a story to tell.
Secondly, if it is the main focus of the story, that is where people have to do their research and really represent what they are talking about. Not some half-baked representation with dull arguments and points that come from a capitalist and conservative worldview. (Looking at you Disney.)
Now what you are referencing are @strangertheory 's and @kaypeace21 's theories which are about the show being about a DiD system where we see different alters evolving in said story with the host being Will Byers.
There is a lot of evidence pointing towards it, I'm gonna let you go see their posts and read it.
But their theories are very different in the way that they see the show portraying DiD, I have actually find quite a great way to describe the two takes.
@kaypeace21 's take is that elements of the DiD system have been externalised through science-"fictional" or supernatural means. Similar to Legion from the Marvel universe.
(David is a powerful mutant with DiD where each alters, if I remember correctly, has a different power or powers. (Which to this day is still one of the most BADASS thing I have ever come across though it must be quite terrifying for David.))
@strangertheory is an internalised POV on the DiD system existing in the show. She believes that what we are seeing right now is what is exclusively happening INSIDE the DiD system and that what we are experiencing is not our standard definition of the "real world". As in the physical world we all know. This would be in very vulgar terms happening inside Will's self, head, mind or brain. In a sense, it would be a more accurate representation of what DiD is about. A Shyamalan twist if you prefer.
(Though right now I don't have any word for word examples of such take, there is a show called MR.ROBOT that fits a bit of this description since there are moments in the show that we are seeing are only happening in the DiD system itself.
I recommend this show A LOT. It still is a bit dramatized but from what I know the DiD representation is quite accurate and pleased a lot of people with DiD. Also some people on the Stranger Things crew worked on that show.)
Now do I love the DiD theory ?
Heck yeah, I fucking love it! And with a big L! (Am I right "The First I love you?").
And I Love both of the takes and I think each one works at explaining the mysteries of this story. I even think that in some ways both could work well together.
I believe that DiD can be, without the meaning of being used, like many things a powerful storytelling "device" since it is connected to so many themes and other writing tools and is linked literally to the psyche, emotions and personalities of the characters.
I can understand why some people like both or one or respectfully and logically dislike both or one of the takes. But it is close to my belief about what the show is about or were even before I came into this fandom or on the internet, not as complex and thought out as the theory itself but pretty close in the overall themes and aspects of it.
(Though it bewilders me how much people lack imagination or are scared of such twist when I have seen so many of those types before whether it's done well or not, accurate or not.)
Now both @strangertheory and @kaypeace21 are intelligent people with very nuanced takes. And they had their fair share of completely unjust controversies coming from either rabbid ignorant shippers, far too sensible people or downright ignorant stupid people, most of the time 16 year olds. I am not saying that they are perfect, no one is, but the hate they have received is completely unjust.
And I am gonna lay it down right here, they are begging for an accurate representation here, they are not doing this because it just sounds cool and is edgy, they are actually wanting that The Duffers pull this off well. They would be very mad if they use all the imagery just to make it look cooler or scarier.
They are not bringer of truths, they are just like us. They are theorists, they believe in something that they think can explain the story they love and are experiencing. And so far, they have a pretty damn good track record.
They are analysing, dissecting the show because it's what they want to do and they believe in it and they believe the Duffers wants them to do that (I mean how come no one believes it when watching a show like that set in the 80's with so many references ?).
It is also supposed to be fun. Have fun for God's Sake! You can disagree with it but calling names and being disrespectful because somehow they don't agree with very basic, lazy and cliché theories (and no it's not being hypocrite, a lot of people barely do the work.) or are not on board with your creepy projection over the characters IS not okay.
And no, they aren't supporting p*d*philia as some people have claimed. How can you read these theories and come up to that conclusion ?
Most people haven't even read the DiD theory or have gone all the way through with it because they are lazy, easily bored people who don't have the time to just relax, process and think.
Stranger Things is not a kids show, some dumb teenage romance drama show with cool monsters! It's a very mature show, with real problems that are treated, out of which is trauma and mental health. Kids are killing people and even dying on this show. There is sexism, racism, abuse both physical and psychological.
It is a very mature and dark show. And you are being disrespectful to the Duffers when you say they are not that smart or that isn't that important. They are putting a lot of thoughts into this and the fact that no one really recognises this annoys me.
Or people only think it's important when it is only about the things they enjoy in the show. (Which is more hypocrite to me.) OR people are very stupid if they truly think that or are just jealous, bitter that two women have more imagination together and individualy than all of them or that person alone.
Color and costume choices, subtext, context, camera angles, directing, VFX, music, editing, sets, props, script, acting and editing are very important. All must be carefully done or you get very bad or generic stuff if you don't. If you love and you are passionate about the work, you put all the details you can into it.
And the Duffers and all the people working with them have already referenced those sort of things AND the practice of what we do on the internet. They are aware, they know because they have been in the same place too. They grew up with stories too, they made theories too whether it's on the internet or not.
At the end of the day, it is just a theory. An explanation of what is unfolding, may unfold or may have unfolded. I believe in it, I think it is reasonable, it has logic and it makes sense. It also has a lots of elements backing it up.
And the Duffers don't even have to go with DiD or mention it. Will creating some of the characters and supernatural events from his trauma is also similar and more accessible to the masses. But a Shyamalan twist can also work if it is done well.
And I am also open to other possibilities and theories, if they make sense and have enough elements IN THE SHOW and everything connected to it backing it up.
If the Duffers write something completely different but it is as good and also explains even better than this theory than I'll be okay. I love being wrong, it makes me learn new things and enhances the way I approach stories in the future.
If the Duffers only used this as some very inaccurate and disrespectful scary/abstract subtext without commiting to it. That is where I will have a problem.
Or write something completely incoherent with the rest of the show with a bad plot twist catering to the main public masses to sell the story even more and just make money so that they are safe with a fallacy of a work of fiction. Because they are cowards who didn't know how to manage themselves and baited entire audiences or listened to some crappy executive who didn't understand shit about the story. (wink wink, looking at a certain something...)
So yeah, I do love the DiD theory and both of it's takes and if it happens and is done right, with of course my perspective on the thing and PRIMARLY the perspective of people who have DiD or know a lot about it, I'll be pleased with it and I think it could be something very important for stories, people, the world and "art" in general.
Thank you for the question it was really fun! I hope I described the theory and the condition in the right way @kaypeace21 and @strangertheory and also the people who are concerned or know about it if I didn't let me know. Also, if you disagree with what I said, the way I said it or the subject itself let me also know IF it's respectful of course.
#stranger asks things#stranger asks#did theory#the did theory#will byers#will the wise#willel#stranger things
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Spot the big bird
I woke up this morning around 6 a.m. to the sound of a pheasant rooster screaming toot-toot under my window. After that, there was wing flapping, as the bird hopped to another spot. He kept making noise all morning, making it impossible for me to sleep. I don’t normally wake up at 6 a.m. on a Saturday, so the rest of my day has been more or less foggy. But I think I get 50 points for spotting a big bird, right?
In this week’s vlog, Rhett and Link go biking by the L.A. river. I know we are currently mostly making jokes about Rhett’s hair going wild, but can I just say that Link looks a bit like an older lady who has just removed the curlers from their hair after the night and forgot to do the final swoop through the curls, in the beginning of the video? (I admit I occasionally have that hair-do, too, even without the curlers. But I feel I had to mention his hair.)
I’m a simple girl living in the country side, and for me, the idea of a river turned into a concrete ditch is a bit odd - even though I know my brother living in a more urban environment, often goes biking by a similar “constructed” river. Not knowing anything about the L.A., I went on to google the bicycle route the guys are taking in this video, and was glad to find out it has its own Wiki page, in case you’re interested!
It seems there is a bit of a power play going on between the guys, as the drive to the start of their path. Rhett is driving this time, but Link is more familiar with the biking route, so who is in charge? I don’t quite know how a bike trip could be turned into a commune living arrangement type of a situation, or how a commune could suddenly turn into a sex cult, but evidently, whoever tells the others they can only have sex with the one in charge, but not with each other, is the leader. So...how does this apply to biking? Also which is it, if there is always a leader? And how the heck did we get to sex cults this early in the video?
I just love how self-concious Rhett is feeling about wearing the bicycle helmet. And, he actually asked for Link’s opinion about which helmet he should wear. I think it’s very adorable, really, and I just love how Link always finds new, innovative ways to compliment Rhett’s mane. This is the first time I’ve heard the word asinine, but Link says it in the most loving way possible, and to be quite honest, he isn’t wrong. But thankfully, Rhett fixes his lopsided hair, and everything works out just fine.
I have to say, bicycle helmets make me feel very self-concious, too. I actually have a helmet that is almost identical to the one Link has - solid black and practical. Why do we need to feel stupid when wearing something that can literally save our lives? (But since helmets do look kinda stupid, at least solid black goes with everything.) And here’s a Grandson of Anarchy, Rhett McLaughlin, for y’all to enjoy, in his full glory:
We have more lakes than rivers around where I live, and most bicycle routes here are basically dirt roads surrounded by rural landscape, but I think I prefer it that way. The scenery around the L.A. river is too open, too loud and way too constructed for my liking, but there is something very grandiose about the river. Rhett also looks pretty grandiose next to Link. I should be used to their size difference by now, but Link looks so tiny, again. He’s small enough to fit in Rhett’s pocket.
I wasn’t getting at all bored by watching the guys on their bikes, but I admit, the idea of a scavenger hunt is pretty appealing, even if the guys probably won’t find people with old money in the river. But there might have been someone rich there, since who in their right mind throws away a fairly functional looking stroller? Don’t they cost a fortune?
I don’t think the river cleaning crew was joking about finding dead bodies in the river. I know in the nearest bigger city in my area, which has a rapid with dams running across the centre, they empty the river of all water every now and then (usually in the spring), and bodies have been found more than once. (Which reminds me, one time I was on a bicycle ride with my mom, and we took a short cut through the woods, and found a dead goat there. It was horrible. It smelled so bad. There were flies everywhere. And now I’ve given everyone reading this nightmares. Sorry.)
I just realized that the L.A. river was probably where they filmed that one chase scene in Terminator 2. Am I right? I knew those concrete slopes looked somehow familiar. No wonder I had an unpleasant feeling about that river. I saw T2 way too young - they should never have allowed me into the theater at the age of 12. But never mind about that.
There is a lot of junk in that river, and it does make me kinda mad, too, just like Rhett. I once found a whole VCR in the place I like to go pick mushrooms, so a VHS tape in a river isn’t surprising. One thing good about the digital age is that there aren’t quite that many old VHS or mix tapes lying around. The mix tape of 2020 is a Spotify playlist, I guess.
Since I clearly have nothing better to do, I ended up doing an internet search on different cross symbols, to find the one carved in the tree stump Rhett and Link find. It appears to be a cross potent. No idea why one would be in L.A. river, unless it’s just a very complicated way to make the tree stump rot quicker.
I think my new favourite thing is seeing Link just give up and start laughing, after trying to get Rhett talk about littering without threatening to kill someone. I think it’s only fair to talk trash about people who throw their trash in nature, and a message coming from an angry biker is probably a good idea. But I just love hearing Link snort and giggle.
After the rat chase vlog, and today’s episode, I think there soon is enough material for a full Rhett and Link horror movie. I would love to hear what the people, who asked if everything was okay with the guys, were thinking. One day, the title of these vlogs is going to be “The One Where They Get Arrested”.
I’m not a qualified gif maker, so I can’t capture all the pelvic thrusts of this vlog in their full glory. As enjoyable as it was to see the guys do their solo acts, some things just are more fun when done together. My only excuse for the edit below is that if they have the audacity to film something like this without even moving the camera between takes, they are asking to be edited together. It took me less than 5 minutes to do the edit, which, yes, is pretty crappy, but I just couldn’t miss the opportunity, when it was served to me on a silver platter.
#rhett and link vlog#rhett and link#vlog 1#the one where the boys go biking#so much litter#l.a. river#so many pelvic thrusts#also#i tried to keep score about everything they found in the river#but i failed#and they didn't really spot a proper big bird
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Face Amidst the Smoke Ch. 10
Rating: Explicit Word Count: 1333 Characters: Astrid Hofferson, Hiccup Haddock Summary: Astrid is paired for a project with someone who she is definitely not eager to work with. Haddock has a reputation of being a bad student, just a bad role model in general. But in being forced to work with one of the worst seniors in the school, she comes to see what is under this bad boy’s exterior… and she may be getting in over her head.
Hardheaded
“Sorry, Haddock, but I won’t be doing that.” I turned and put the two drinks on the table. “Gobber told you to bring me here just yesterday. Of course, there may have been a reason why you changed your mind. Your godfather knew you lived like this, and you didn’t want me to have to work in this kind of setting, where our very lives are at risk. But I really don’t think you want to be kicking me out. How would your godfather react if I called the repair shop tomorrow, and I told him you forcibly removed me from your own home?”
He seemed to play along, his scowl melting into a sarcastic smile. “You’re using my godfather as leverage? Just because you met him yesterday doesn’t give you a free pass.”
“Him and I will be getting along very well in the coming month. He knows we’re doing this project together. Even though you don’t live under his roof I bet that he’ll want updates.”
The second time I saw that blade. Though today I was very confident that I could disarm him even if words didn’t sway. I was operating on pent-up energy from this morning. I was thinking that I may have to use it on an oncoming assailant, but for now it may have to be Haddock. The blade flicked back. Though his hands were still liable for unwanted contact.
“Why do you even want to be here? We finished the sources page yesterday.”
“This whole weekend has been about finding out where you live. I found two places where I know you’ll be at if you choose to start avoiding me. I brought drinks, and my laptop so we could work on the outline. I know you don’t have much of a work ethic, but while you’re working with me for the rest of the month you will have one. This project is getting an A, even if I have to sit in this crappy apartment to do it.”
“The library isn’t ideal for you?” He strode over to a small table with high legs near the hallway to grab a beer bottle.
“No.” I let my bag sag to the ground. “I prefer a little more noise than the click of keyboards and turning pages.
“You really want to be stuck working here where there’s the occasional scream and a constant unpleasant smell?” He took a swig.
“I’ll come to tolerate it, as you must have had to do.”
“And you just had to do this with me sitting next to you to get this done? You know, most of our classmates are literally in different parts of town not even planning to get together this entire month.”
“You chose to be babysat like a child Haddock. Me being here or at your work is my insurance.”
“It’s your funeral.”
“Great. So, you going to give me a tour before we get started?”
He rolled his eyes. “Let’s just get this shit over with.”
“Get your laptop so we can work on it.”
He only needed to spare a single glance my way before I realized what he was about to say. This truly was a crappy situation he lived in.
“You don’t have a laptop.”
“Yeah. And you’re going to need to use your hotspot on your phone if ya got one. No internet either.”
“I see why you never get any schoolwork done.”
“That’s,” He took another swig, “another reason entirely Hofferson.” And he collapsed to the couch.
I knelt down and pulled out my laptop. It was a major inconvenience, but if I left now how much of a coward would I look like? If I were Tuffnut or Heather, I would have already left. As a joke, I told myself that Hiccup should have lead with that and then I probably wouldn’t have even crossed the threshold. I slid out my laptopwith a sea blue case and slid it onto the coffee table.
“Do you at least have an outlet in case I need to charge anything?”
“Right under there.” He pointed at the high table.
As I glanced over, I saw that one of the legs had cracked and was being held together by some tightly wound layers of duct tape. But sure enough, there was an outlet. Even if the plastic itself was broken and some parts missing, thus exposing the wiring beneath.
“How can you live like this?” I couldn’t help but say as I sat at the other end of the couch.
He looked around, exaggerating the movement as if looking at his apartment for the first time.
“There’s worse places to live.” He merely said.
“A smaller place than this?” I opened the device.
“Living on the streets.” He commented as he took a long gulp of the beer.
I didn’t know what I was more uncomfortable with, seeing Hiccup drinking alcohol or him smoking cigarettes. I knew that there were laws prohibiting minors from purchasing alcohol or products with nicotine. Left to deduce that someone was providing him with this stuff that was destroying his body. Someone was in a way pushing him to continue these bad habits. Gobber would have to know who it was. He worked with him, seemed to know a lot about Hiccup’s life. If he wasn’t keen to share, then maybe his godfather was. I opened the outline, seeing the empty lines before me. But in the next doc, would be where we could fill this in.
His couch was too small. I’ll say this much. If I had the nerve to tell Heather the entirety of my weekend adventure she’d be really suspicious of this scenario. The couch could seat three people, only if they were skinny and knew how to respect space. Now that wasn’t to say that Hiccup was coming on to me. I say it in a way of explaining how the saggy cushion I was stuck sitting on seemed to shift me little by little toward him. For his one day off, he truly did dress casual. He wore a thin burgundy sweatshirt and black jeans, part of the belt coming free of the loops. Sitting this close, sharing the laptop between us, I could see that his left ear was adorned with four helix piercings, all silver circlets trailing down the top part of his ear.
He smelled vaguely of smoke, and the occasional sentence would deliver the stench of beer. His eyes only strayed from the screen when he’d lean over and pick up his beer bottle. It was, disconcerting to see him like this. I’d seen my parents drink occasionally, but they’d always been careful not to do it in front of me. Sometimes a margarita accompanying a dinner, or them having some wine when celebrating. But seeing one of my own classmates, someone my age, smoking and drinking without a care, made me give him some scrutinizing stares. Although I couldn’t tell him to refrain from doing either while I was in his home. I was the one who had been so determined to stay.
“No, I don’t think we should put that there. It’d fit better for the counter-argument.” His finger pointed at a line.
“But it supports the topic sentence.”
“If we try to give an analysis on this it’ll contradict the statement we’re trying to make.”
I copied the line and pasted it in its proper spot. We were using the sources he had found at the current moment, but we’d made small progress on the outline. One journal Hiccup had typed in was at least thirty pages long, and it had taken a while to navigate through all of the pages bearing statistics. He’d suggested that maybe we search for another, but I told him we could use this for the presentation. If we came to some kind of understanding of the lingo used over the next few weeks.
“Do you have a restroom?” I asked.
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Answer the questions and tag 11 people you want to know better!
@devildomz tagged us in an ask game. ok hell yeah this is a 2 in 1 blog
1. What do you prefer to be called namewise?
adri: adri !
nat: nat ........ lol our names are right there
2. When is your birthday?
adri: june 29 ... cancer season 😌 ✌️
nat: december 11 sagittarius gang only
3. Where do you live? (You can just give the country’s or state name if you’re not comfortable with sharing the city name)
adri: both of us are from the sf bay area
nat: what she said
4. Three things you are doing right now?
adri: i made fresh strawberry milk + boba and i am sipping on that. i am also listening to weeb music. i am also drawing somn 👀
nat: i am dyeing fabric in a pot with acrylic paint bc im in the throes of finals week and also im blasting fall out boy just one yesterday cause its 2015 again. yeah
5. Four fandoms that have your peak interest right now?
adri: at the forefront it is literally obey me the demon dating sim and haikyuu the volleyball anime is my ultimate comfort media. thats all folks i dont have four
nat: obey me is my emotional support quarantine hyperfixation but also animal crossing
6. How has this pandemic been treating you?
adri: not kidding! godawful! i hate it here ive never been more depressed in my life
nat: my life is gonna turn around as soon as im done with class next week but for now i am literally going through it.
7. A song you can’t stop listening to right now?
adri: tattoos together -- lauv
nat: mouth of the devil - mother mother
8. Recommend a movie
adri: marie antoinette dir. sofia coppola. is something that can be so personal
nat: phantom thread 2017 dir. paul thomas anderson. absolutely insane
9. How old are you?
adri: i am 19
nat: me also
10. School, university, occupation or other
adri: university but summer break just started 4 me. double majoring in english/environmental studies
nat: university also i go to art school. studying textiles & trying to double major in illustration. still working on the last one tho........
11. Do you prefer heat or cold?
adri: for outside weather sunny and warm, for indoor temp cold
nat: 70 degrees is the ideal living temperature i dont take feedback. also it is better to be cold than hot
12. Name one fact about you that others might find unusual
adri: bruv i am a normie i cannot think of an unusual thing. i am a vegan thats my weirdest unusual shit
nat: idk uhhhhhhhh. actually ok i thought my birthday was the wrong day for 10 years
13. Are you shy?
adri: i do not think that im shy i literally am just woefully picky with people i have in my life so i snip out people i dont immediately click with. not shy just unfortunately frigid akhddkg
nat: no only on the internet
14. Do you have preferred pronouns?
adri: she/her
nat: anythings cool honestly but i prefer he/they slightly.
15. Biggest pet peeves?
adri: gross but. aggressive burping without apology when i dont know u like that
nat: hate it when ppl try to be rude funny like what is ur damage lol.. only do that if i know u -_-
16. What is your favourite “-dere” type?
adri: i had to look this shit up bc i didnt know any dere type other than tsundere but i still say tsundere because its so fun
nat: not a weeb so i had to check anyway its deredere i love happy bitches. good for them
17. Rate your life 1-10. 1 being crappy, 10 being amazing.
adri: last week it was a -8 but today it’s a 5??? im unfortunately going thru some shit rn but im on the up again
nat: 3-4 right now but i am finally getting off my ass for my finals. as soon as next week passes i guarantee i WILL be at 10
18. What is your main blog?
adri: @adrisama where i blog about haikyuu and rb whatever else i want
nat: @goo-mies its just everything there.
19. List your side blogs and what they are used for.
adri: oh christ. they are all lowkey dead for now bc i literally caught obey me disease but @twilitinhere for twilight blogging. @puffsleeves for blogging about anne with an e. @agrestes for miraculous ladybug. u are looking at the newest sideblog here at devilstree dot tumblr dot com
nat: i have an art blog @dovebranch and an aes blog @solohsis which r the only ones im really using rn. i used to have a tf2 sideblog but i havent touched it in 2 years and the art is old so i am NOT sharing
20. One thing you think people should know about you before they become your friends?
adri: this is just for people who follow this blog and play obey me.... i stan satan and mammon. yes they r on critical opposing ends of the sapiosexual/morosexual spectrum. i have two hands!!!!! 🤧🤧🤧
nat: im just gonna piggyback off of what adri answered. anyway i stan levi and asmo who are also on opposite extremes except its the two ends of the cringe-sexy scale. (pinches fingers together) its about the duality
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Killervibe Fic Week Day Five: Flashpoint
Word Count: 5014
Notes: Before this fic, I had never written anything in the Flashpoint universe, seeing as how the Flashpoint timeline only existed for one episode before Barry restored the timeline to normal, but I gotta say… This was really fun. Killervibe’s Flashpoint selves are so drastically different from their normal selves, and I got to experiment with new character types, and I loved that. Flashpoint!Cisco is a dick, but deep down, he does secretly care, he just puts on an arrogant persona for show, and that character type was really fun to write. Especially when he’s paired with Flashpoint!Caitlin, who is a humble, reserved eye doctor, aka his polar opposite.
Disclaimer: This is a tiny bit divergent from how the actual Flashpoint episode took place, but if I didn’t change the events around a bit, I wouldn’t have anything to write a fic out of.
Tags: @thatkillervibe @shakesqueer-writes @narniasfinestavengingsociopath
~~~
Cisco Ramon has had women fawning over him for years. Being the richest man in America has its benefits. The more his bank filled up, the sexier he became. He was on magazine covers, Buzzfeed articles, internet gifs. All of that deemed him one of the most desirable men in the country. He could get anyone he wanted, men and women, without having to even try. All he had to do was give them a flirtatious wink and use the sexy deep voice that he had spent so long perfecting in front of the mirror, and they were his.
But then he met her. And suddenly, none of that mattered anymore.
Everything in his life, his riches, his fame… it all felt trivial in comparison to her. The way he felt when he met her for the first time was unlike anything he had ever felt before, for anyone. He never knew he was missing something in his life until she came and filled that gap. He met her yesterday, and yet somehow, he felt like he had known her for an eternity. He felt like he had stood by her side through thick and thin, talked with her, laughed with her, cried with her. He felt like he knew her. He felt like he loved her.
But, as it turns out, the only thing he actually knew about her was her name.
Caitlin Snow.
That new speedster- Barry, he said his name was- had said she was a part of their team. A scientist, apparently.
It all made Cisco’s head hurt. He just wanted answers.
“Hey, stringbean.”
Cisco had followed Barry out into the corridor with the intentions of stopping him in his tracks. It worked. Upon hearing Cisco’s voice, Barry stopped walking and turned around to face him.
“Y’know, you ask me to call you Mr. Ramon, and yet you refuse to call me by my name.” Barry’s tone was more amused than accusatory, like he was speaking with an old friend. Maybe in his eyes, he was.
“Oh I’m sorry, are you the richest man in America?”
“No.”
“Didn’t think so, stringbean.”
“Right.” Barry rolled his eyes ever so slightly at Cisco’s lack of humility. “I assume you wanted to talk about something?”
“This Caitlin Snow. You said she was part of your team in this other timeline?”
“Our team. And yes. Where I’m from, Star Labs is still a thing. You and Caitlin are both employees there. You’ve known each other for years, you’re best friends. Practically inseparable.”
“Best friends, huh?”
Barry blinked. “Yeah, why?”
“That’s it?”
“Why, do you think there’d be something more?” Barry asked.
“No, no.” Cisco shook his head, but his tone and hurriedness to answer the question left Barry unconvinced. Noticing this, Cisco elaborated. “It’s just… I’ve only known her a day, but something about her makes me feel… weird. I feel like I’ve known her for years. I feel like I can trust her with my deepest secrets. Listen, no one knows my deepest secrets except me and myself alone. Especially not some girl I met yesterday.”
Barry tilted his head to the side, and a smirk formed on his face. “You feel love.”
Cisco laughed. “You’re delusional.”
“I know it sounds crazy, but hear me out.” Barry said. “Iris said the same thing.”
“About you?”
Barry nodded. “I think, what you’re describing with Caitlin, it’s the same thing. Your love for Caitlin, in the timeline I’m from, is so strong that you can sense it, here, in this timeline.”
“This alternate timeline shit is messing me up.” Cisco said. “This isn’t an alternate timeline. It’s my life. This is the life I’ve lived since the day I was born.”
“To you, yes, but…” Barry slid his hands into his jean pockets. “Not to me.”
“That’s insane.” Cisco sighed in defeat. “But whatever. I don’t want to think about that right now. Just tell me how to deal with… this.”
Barry shrugged. “The normal way. Talk to her. Tell her how you feel.”
“Absolutely not.” Cisco shook his head. “Feelings are gross. No thanks.”
“If I’m right, and these feelings are part of my timeline shining through, then… it’s incredibly possible that Caitlin feels the same way.” Barry said. “You just have to ask.”
“You said yourself that we’re supposedly just best friends in your timeline.” Cisco said. “What if the Cisco from your timeline is just some miserable pining loser and I was unfortunate enough to get his gross ass feelings in this timeline? I don’t want it. Make it go away. Do some speedster shit or something, I’m out.”
“I can’t fix this.” Barry said. “This is up to you.”
“That’s a crappy deal.” Cisco scoffed. “I was perfectly fine with my life up until a day ago when a literal stranger came into my building and told me that my entire life, everything I’ve ever known is just some alternate timeline he made by recklessly time-traveling.”
“Really?” Barry raised an eyebrow. “You haven’t once thought that there was something missing, something not quite right?”
Cisco hesitated. Barry’s words had hit harder than he’d like to admit.
“You don’t know me, stringbean.”
Barry laughed. “Yes, I do, Cisco. You and I have been friends for years.”
“No.” Cisco shook his head. “No, you don’t. You know the Cisco Ramon in your timeline. Whoever he is, he’s not me.”
“I know you well enough to know that you have a heart.” Barry said. “You act tough for show, but deep down, you care.”
Cisco struggled to think of a response for that. Luckily, he didn’t need to. Before he could answer, a scream sounded from the cortex, causing both Cisco and Barry to forget their conversation and rush to see what the matter was. Barry sped into the cortex, and Cisco ran up behind him not long after.
The Rival himself was standing in the middle of Ramon Industries, holding two guns pointed at Caitlin and Wally. The scream had come from Caitlin, whereas Wally gulped and looked to Barry and Cisco for help.
“Well, well, well.” The Rival kept the guns pointing straight at the hostages, but turned his head to face Barry. He sized him up and down, staring especially at his shoes, how they were worn down from speeding everywhere. “Two speedsters. Isn’t this a treat?”
Barry instantly regretted speeding into the room.
“You don’t need to put innocent people in harm.” Barry said. “You want speedsters, right? Put the guns down, and we’ll work something out.”
The Rival laughed. “Brave move, trying to save your friends. But you’re gonna have to do a little more than that to make me happy.”
“What do you want, then?” Barry raised his voice to a shout.
Cisco eyed him with a newfound respect. This Caitlin and this Wally… they weren’t the same ones Barry knew in his timeline, and yet he was still desperate to save them, no matter the cost.
“Y’know, robbing the city is fun, but… it gets a bit boring without a little competition.” The Rival tilted his head and puffed out his lip in a mocking pout, then exploded into laughter. “So I challenged the Flash. But then… just to my luck, another Flash shows up, here, in my city! What’re the odds? Two Flashes, two speedsters to challenge me!”
“Then, fight the Flash. Leave these civilians alone.” Barry took a step forwards, staring directly at The Rival. The Rival only narrowed his eyes at him.
“Nice try.” The Rival said. “It’s funny how much you can find out from eavesdropping. Like, for instance, listening in on just one little conversation can tell you the very identity of your city’s local masked runner.” He narrowed his eyes, staring directly at Wally. “Wally West, is it?”
Wally gulped.
“Maybe the speedsters just need a little extra motivation. After all, I can’t be a proper rival if I don’t raise the stakes, now can I?” The Rival cackled. “Hostages are great for that. Maybe I’ll just… take these two with me, and you two can come find them!”
Barry and Wally simultaneously cried out, but it wasn’t fast enough.
The Rival released the guns from his hands. Red lightning surrounded him, and everything else seemed to slow down. He surged forwards and grabbed Caitlin in one hand and Cisco in the other, and he was out of the building before the guns even clattered to the ground. Wally and Barry raced after him with their own streams of lightning following behind, but The Rival was gone.
~~~
Cisco rubbed his head and winced. The Rival had thrown him against the ground rather violently, and the impact had left a bump and a searing pain. He had blacked out for a couple seconds, but even just those couple seconds were enough for the Rival to tie him and Caitlin together using handcuffs around their wrists and one large rope around their torsos. The Rival left without saying a word. The last thing they saw was his red lightning, then he was gone, and the door shut behind him.
Cisco could feel Caitlin’s back pressed up against his. The rope dug into his chest, but when he tried to wiggle himself more room, he only further constricted Caitlin.
“Stop breathing so loud.” He hissed.
“I’m not breathing any louder than normal.”
“I can hear it, and it’s loud.”
Caitlin only sighed. If she rolled her eyes, Cisco didn’t see.
The two of them could hardly move without bumping heads against each other. In the movies, the hostages were usually at least tied to chairs or a pole, but in their unfortunate case, they were just abandoned on the dirty ground with the rats and cockroaches.
“Was it really necessary to tie us to each other?” Cisco grumbled. “Handcuffing us wasn’t enough? Nooo, we have to be back-to-back like in the movies.”
“Stop whining.”
“Stop whining?” Cisco nearly laughed, in a dry, humorless way. “In case you haven’t noticed, we’re hostages in the middle of God-knows-where, tied together and left for the rats! This isn’t exactly my idea of a fun vacation!”
“I’m tense too, I just know that whining isn’t going to solve anything.”
“Of course, silly me.” Cisco rolled his eyes, as if his heavily sarcastic tone wasn’t enough.
“Is it possible for you to actually act your age, or am I going to have to treat you like a damn six-year-old?”
Cisco’s eyes grew wide at Caitlin’s harsh tone. He wasn’t necessarily upset that she had snapped at him, mostly just… surprised.
“I didn’t think you had that in you, Kiddie Eye Doc.”
“Like I said.” She grumbled. “I’m tense.”
“Hey, I get it.” He said. “Let’s focus on trying to get out of here. Do you by any chance have some kickass powers that will help us escape?”
Caitlin shook her head.
“Dammit.” Cisco sighed. “Me neither.”
Cisco scanned the area. They were in some kind of empty warehouse, but Cisco had no idea where. It was big, and there were rotting wooden crates lying around in stacks that Cisco suspected hadn’t been touched in a very long time. In just the time he’d been there, Cisco had spotted two different rats, and he could hear the squeaking of more behind the crates. The warehouse had small windows for letting light in, but they were positioned just below the roof, possibly fifteen to twenty feet high. They were cracked open just enough to let bugs in. Right now, they were allowing light from the full moon outside to shine into the warehouse, supplying the only light source that Caitlin and Cisco had to go off of. The warehouse door was old and tattered, but it was made secure by chains and a lock.
“How well can you pick locks?” Cisco tilted his head as far back as he could, his best attempt at facing Caitlin when they were tied back-to-back.
“Well, when I was a kid I loved reading Nancy Drew books, so sometimes I’d lock my bedroom door and try to pick the lock back open just for fun.” Caitlin said. “I would wear hair pins in my hair just in case I ever needed to pick a lock.”
“Wow,” Cisco’s jaw dropped open just a bit, and the corner of his lips almost formed an impressed smile. His eyes glimmered with a look of surprise, and… newfound respect. “Kiddie Eye Doc has a rebellious side.”
“I was in the ninth grade. It’s been years,” Caitlin said.
“Well, unless you have a better option, that’s the most we’ve got to go off of.” Cisco said. “Do you have a hair tie on you right now?”
Caitlin nodded. “I’m wearing a few in my hair right now.”
“That’s perfect!” Cisco practically lit up. “Then we have a plan!”
“We do?” Caitlin raised an eyebrow. “How am I supposed to pick the lock when my hands are tied?”
Cisco bit his lip. He hadn’t thought of that.
“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”
“This plan isn’t very thought-out.” Caitlin pursed her lips. “Aren’t you supposed to be a genius?”
Cisco scoffed. “Excuse you. I am a genius, thank you very much.”
“Your plan has about a million holes in it.”
“Well, at least I’m actively trying to formulate a plan.” If Cisco could’ve made eye contact with her, he would’ve glared at her. “Look, do you wanna get out of here or not?”
Caitlin sighed. “Fine, we’ll try your way then.”
“Okay. We stand up on the count of three.” Cisco said. “One, two, three-”
Cisco stood up before Caitlin was ready, which caused Caitlin to stumble, which caused Cisco to fall with her. The both of them found themselves on the ground once again, and they hadn’t even been up for a solid two seconds.
Cisco sighed. “Alright, take two.”
Caitlin counted this time, and yet Cisco still got up before she did, and the imbalance threw them off.
“Maybe we should say ‘stand up’ or ‘go’ after we count.” Caitlin suggested. “That way, we can indicate exactly when we stand up.”
“We have that. It’s called ‘three’. You stand up on three.”
“I am standing up on three!”
“No, you’re not. I’m standing up on three. You’re standing up after three.”
“Well maybe that wasn’t clear enough.” Caitlin sounded like the self-righteous teacher’s pet of every 8th grade class. “It was my understanding that we would stand up after you finished saying the word three-”
“No! We stand up on three! That means, when I say it!”
Caitlin scoffed. “You’re impossible.”
“You’re impossible.”
She rolled her eyes. “Very mature of you.”
“Look, I don’t know about you, but I really want to get out of this crummy ass warehouse, so let’s at least try one more time and actually get it right.” Cisco would have rubbed his temples had he been able to freely move his hands.
“Fine.” She sighed. “One more try.”
They agreed to count to three at the same time in order to avoid confusion. They spoke slowly so that they could be in sync, but even then they were a little off. And yet, on three, they stood up. Both of them, at the same time, thank god. They stumbled a bit, but they quickly regained their balance and managed to stay upright. They both sighed in relief.
“We did it!” Cisco cheered. He would’ve pumped his fist in the air, or maybe even hugged Caitlin in his excitement, if he had been able to freely move his arms.
“Look at us!” Caitlin was grinning. “We’re standing!”
“We could do it after all!”
Maybe it was the euphoria of the moment. Maybe it was the underlying adrenaline of their situation. But, in that moment, standing upright in that abandoned warehouse, their backs pressed to each other… Cisco and Caitlin started laughing. They giggled like schoolchildren, not really sure why.
Cisco leaned the back of his head against Caitlin’s shoulder and sighed happily.
“Alright, let’s try walking towards the door.” Caitlin said. “Slowly.”
“Alright.”
Caitlin shuffled her feet forwards ever-so-carefully. Cisco followed suit, trying to keep up with Caitlin, even when he couldn’t see her feet.
“Okay, this is going nowhere.” Caitlin sighed after a full minute of meticulous shuffling. “I’m going to start taking bigger steps.”
“How big?”
“I’ll start small and get bigger.”
“Okay.”
Caitlin took a small step at first, and Cisco tried to match with his own step of equal distance. Caitlin stepped once more, and once more Cisco matched it. They began stepping in the direction of the door, slowly but steadily.
Then Caitlin took a step that was a bit too large. The movement tugged Cisco’s chest a bit too forcefully, and he lost his footing. He stumbled and fell to the ground, pulling Caitlin along with him.
“SHIT!” Cisco cursed. “That was way too big of a step.”
“Oh, so it’s my fault we fell?” Caitlin spit out a bit of dirt that got into her mouth when they fell. “You’re the one who stumbled.”
The two of them struggled against each other, trying to sit upright but lacking the coordination with the other that they needed in order to do so effectively. Eventually, they managed, but it took a solid thirty seconds.
“Great.” Cisco scoffed and rolled his eyes. “This is pointless. We’re never escaping. The headlines are gonna say ‘Cisco Ramon, richest man in America, found dead in an abandoned warehouse’.”
Caitlin would’ve glared at him if she had been able to make eye contact. “I guess it’s true, what they say about you.”
“What is?”
“That you only ever care about yourself.”
Cisco didn’t know how to reply to that. He knew it was pointless to try to deny it. He knew it was true. He was arrogant, sure, but one thing he would never be was an idiot.
“I guess it is.” He said after a long pause. He spoke with a low, quiet tone. He tried to sound casual, but he was afraid it didn’t convey that way.
“I don’t want to believe it.” She said. “I don’t want to see you as the person the media makes you out to be.”
“Even if there’s truth to it?”
Caitlin hesitated. “Surely you weren’t always this…” She trailed off.
“This what?” Cisco pressed. “Cocky? Arrogant? Dickish?”
“Closed-off.”
Oh.
Cisco hesitated.
“I wasn’t.” He said finally. “I used to be different. I used to… care.”
“Yeah?” Caitlin asked.
“I had a brother.” Cisco shuffled his shoe against the dirty warehouse floor as he talked. “Dante Ramon. He was two years older than me, but when we were young, people would ask if we were twins. Not because we looked alike- I take more after our mom, he takes more after our dad- but because we were inseparable. As kids, we would play in the backyard and go ‘exploring’ together. We’d play with old Pokemon cards. We’d watch old movies together and share popcorn, and he’d complain because I ate most of it, so I’d make more. We’d play pretend and make up our own fantasy worlds, with knights and elves and dragons. As we got older… things changed. I was more interested in technology, engineering, inventing things. He was the concert pianist… and the golden child. He was always our parents’ favorite, and I never knew why. He always got our parents’ approval without even trying, and I envied that. That jealousy is kinda what drove us apart, and it’s why I grew up to crave fame and attention. It’s bad, I know.”
“It’s basic psychology.” Caitlin said. “You were second best in your childhood, so you crave the spotlight as an adult.”
“Yeah.” Cisco said. “Anyways, in my early 20’s, I realized just how much I missed my brother. So, I reached out to him, and we started to reconnect. We went out for a drink every once in a while to catch up. We watched old movies together like we used to do when we were kids. I started to really feel like I had gotten my brother back.”
“What happened?”
“He died.”
Cisco stared at the dirt on the bottom of his shoe. He felt a sinking feeling in his gut, but he ignored it. He hated that feeling. It was the same feeling he got at Dante’s funeral. It was the same feeling he got when he had to pack up the movies that reminded him of his brother. It was the same feeling he got right when he was about to cry. He hated crying.
“I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. It’s not your fault.” Cisco let out a deep sigh and continued. “It happened in a car accident. Dante was driving home after dark, and a drunk driver came out of nowhere and swerved right into his car. I got the call the next day telling me… telling me what happened.”
“That’s why you’re closed-off.” Caitlin said. “Because you’ve been hurt.”
“After Dante died, I immersed myself in my job. I tucked away all my feelings. To me, it was better to not feel at all than to feel pain.” Cisco made a face of disgust. “Feelings. Emotional attachments. I hate the lot. It’s all gross, and I can do just fine without it.”
“You can’t just lock away your emotions.” Caitlin’s voice was gentle. “You need them. They’re a part of being human, no matter how hard you try to suppress them.”
“No thanks.” Cisco said. “The press sees me as just another arrogant rich prick anyways. Why not live up to the expectation?”
“Because you’re more than that.”
Cisco scoffed. “That part of me died with Dante.”
“No, it didn’t.” Caitlin shook her head softly. “If you were truly emotionless, you wouldn’t have opened up to me just now.”
He felt a twang of regret. “I… don’t really know why I did that. I don’t open up to anyone. Ever. Especially not people I just met.”
“And yet you did.”
Cisco recalled the conversation he had with Barry.
That’s different. You aren’t just any random stranger to me.
Not that he would ever admit that, of course.
“I’m glad you opened up to me.” Caitlin spoke again after a moment’s pause. “It’s good to know you’re not heartless.”
“Thanks, I guess.” Cisco tried his hardest to maintain his natural nonchalant tone. “And, uh… it’s good to see you’re more than just a kiddie eye doctor.”
To Cisco’s surprise, Caitlin laughed.
“Thanks, Cisco.”
And for once, Cisco didn’t mind that she called him by his first name.
“Is it weird that, uh…” Cisco didn’t know what he was saying. He spoke without thinking, his words coming out without his control. His blush increased with each individual word. “I feel like I’ve known you for a long time. I feel like I can trust you. I guess that’s why I opened up.” He cringed. “No, that’s weird. Nevermind. Forget I said anything.”
“I get what you mean.”
Cisco perked up. He couldn’t look at her directly, but he raised his head and tilted it slightly in Caitlin’s direction.
“You do?”
Caitlin nodded. “It is weird, and yet… I feel the same way towards you. I feel like I’ve known you for years. I guess that’s why I so desperately wanted to believe you were more than what they say about you. You proved me right.”
Cisco was glad Caitlin couldn’t see his face, because in that moment, he smiled, and he blushed, like a damn eighth grader talking to their crush. He could feel butterflies in his stomach, which only made it worse. He had known her for one day. Even if it was because of this timeline shit that Barry keeps mentioning, it was still weird.
“Oh. Well…” Cisco hated this feeling. He felt more humble than he had felt in years, and he hated humility. It made him feel vulnerable, and weak. “Good to know it’s mutual.”
“It is.”
“Y’know, Kiddie Eye Doc, you’re not that bad.” Cisco said. “I guess, if I had to be trapped here with anyone, I’m glad it’s with you.”
“Thanks.”
Cisco couldn’t see her expression, and he couldn’t tell from her tone whether she was expressing genuine gratitude or if she was being sarcastic. He wasn’t about to ask.
He was about to speak, but the sound of thumping caught his attention. The metal door shook with each pound, as if someone was trying to break it open.
Then the thumping stopped. And, for a moment, it was quiet.
Caitlin gulped. “Do you think that was The Rival?”
“Who cares who it was? They’re gone now.”
And then a figure phased through the door, leaving a trail of lightning behind them. The speedster was moving so fast that all Caitlin and Cisco saw was a vague blur.
Cisco felt a sinking dread in his gut. Caitlin was right, The Rival’s back-
But then he realized something. The lightning was yellow. The Rival’s lightning was red.
The figure ran to the far side of the warehouse before stopping. His lightning faded, and his body was no longer a blur. He wore a red suit instead of The Rival’s black one, and he looked at Cisco and Caitlin with a sense of friendly familiarity, not malice.
A wave of relief washed over Cisco, and he couldn’t stop himself from grinning.
“Stringbean!”
Barry sighed. “I’m saving your life and you still won’t call me by my name.”
“Sorry.” Cisco said. “Seriously, thanks for saving us.”
Wally phased through the door a few seconds later and skidded to a stop next to Barry.
“I talked to my dad. He’s gonna take The Rival to CCPD.” Wally said. “He’s already in meta-cuffs so he won’t try anything.”
“Okay, good.”
In a flurry of lightning, Barry untied both Cisco and Caitlin. The two of them stood up and stretched, finally free from the ropes binding them together. Cisco met Caitlin’s brown eyes, and he smiled. Not his usual cocky, arrogant smile… but a genuine, sweet one.
And she smiled back.
“Alright,” Barry said. “Let’s get out of here.”
~~~
Cisco took a deep breath, as if mentally preparing himself, and then swung open the door and walked in.
There was a sign above the front desk that displayed the words “Central City Ophthalmology” in big, bold letters. What stood out was the ugly shade of green and the rather unflattering font they had chosen. All throughout the inside of the building were advertisements of smiling models in various types of glasses. Their smiles looked noticeably fake, but as far as marketing goes, it wasn’t terrible.
He walked up to the front desk.
“Hi, I’m looking for a Dr. Caitlin Snow.”
The receptionist looked up at him. “Do you have an appointment?”
“Oh, no, I’m not here for an eye appointment.” He said. “I just wanna… talk to her.”
She raised an eyebrow, but let it be. “Dr. Snow gets off of work soon. You can talk to her then.”
Cisco opened his mouth to ask her when Caitlin got off work, when he heard a familiar voice.
“Cisco?”
He looked up to see that Caitlin had walked into the lobby area. She was looking at him with a perplexed expression, as if silently asking him what his reason was for coming.
His eyes lit up upon seeing her. “Kiddie Eye Doc!”
She laughed at the nickname.
“I heard you ask for me and I got curious.” She said. “Why are you here?”
Cisco searched for an answer to that question, but words failed him. “Can I talk to you… somewhere private? It’ll only take a second, I swear.”
Caitlin furrowed her brow in confusion, but agreed. The two of them stepped outside.
“I’ll admit,” Caitlin said. “It is nice seeing you.”
“Yeah?” Cisco raised an eyebrow.
“Don’t let it get to your head.” Caitlin’s tone was teasing, the same way she’d talk to a friend. Is that what they were?
Cisco laughed.
“So what brings you here?”
“Well, I wanted to see you. There’s something about being kidnapped and tied to each other that makes you feel a little bit closer to that person once it’s over. We bonded a bit, don’t you think?” Cisco ran his hand through his hair. “And uh… I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. I’m not the best with feelings, that much is a given, but… I’m willing to try.”
Something about Cisco seemed different. His general demeanor, how he held himself, how he spoke. He wasn’t cocky, he wasn’t boasting. He wasn’t holding himself up high. He was sincere. He spoke with a soft, genuine tone, compared to his usual tone, which was arrogant and self-righteous. He stumbled a bit over his words, an imperfection that he wouldn’t have dared shown when he was maintaining his prideful reputation.
He truly was trying to be a better person, and it showed.
“That’s mature of you.”
“I was wondering if you’d be interested in possibly having dinner with me sometime.” Cisco was blushing now. Cisco Ramon. Blushing. “It’s totally fine if not-”
Caitlin smiled.
“I’d love to.”
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We Are A Family-part 18
Title: We Are A Family. Pairings: Steve x tony, Peter x Wade, Nat x Clint, Sam x Bucky. Part: 18/? Warnings: swearing, fluff, angst, eventual smut, slowburn. Summary: When Nat comes into the avengers tower with baby Peter Parker, the avengers didn’t know what they were getting themselves into. But now that Peter is here,Steve and Tony both feel protective over him. It doesn’t help that Peter hates everyone other than Steve and tony. But as Steve and tony raise Peter, they start to fall for one another. Will this superfamily work out or will it all turn to hell? A/N: Lol this would have been up sooner but my internet crashes everytime i try and upload this which is super frustrating. anyway hope you enjoy this.
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17
As it turned out, planning a wedding was harder than Steve had anticipated. Steve literally thought you merely had to book a venue, get a cake and do the ceremony. Maybe get a pizza afterwards. He had never considered the flowers and tablecloths and the type of envelope to use for their invitations. Tony on the other hand had made list after list about all the things they needed to organise. And they had already agreed on doing a small wedding. The last thing Steve wanted was to get up in front of a crowd of people he didn’t really know and to make a spectacle of himself. He just wanted to marry the man he loved in front of the people he loved. But big or small, Steve wasn’t able to escape the tablecloths.
“Why do you care about tablecloths?” Steve asked suddenly. He heard Tony sigh and look up from his tablet, he was working on something.
“What?” Tony asked, he wasn’t really listening so Steve didn’t bother repeating it. After a minute or two, Tony turned the tablet off and made a point of giving Steve his full attention.
“Why are the tablecloths so important?” Steve asked and Tony gave Steve a lazy smile.
“they’re not.” He said simply, which only irritated Steve.
“Then why have I spent the past hour looking at and feeling different tablecloths?” Steve demanded and Tony chuckled. Steve didn’t see what was so funny. He couldn’t get passed the fact that Tony didn’t even think that the tablecloths were an important part of their wedding.
“To be honest with you Steve, I don’t give two flying shits about the tablecloths,” Tony ran a hand through his hair and Steve let out a frustrated groan. “But, I think it’s adorable that you care so much.” Tony smirked.
“Tony.” Steve whined and Tony laughed.
“the tablecloths are important because they’re a part of our wedding. I want everything to be perfect.” Tony kissed Steve and Steve melted into the kiss. This was perfect. Tablecloths and flowers and seating plans were irrelevant. The only perfect wedding would be one where Steve was marrying Tony. Nothing else mattered.
“Well since the tablecloths aren’t so important,” Steve pulled away from the kiss and they were grinning like the biggest dorks in the world. “You can decide which one we use.” Steve smirked and Tony frowned.
“Which was your favourite?” Tony asked and Steve shrugged.
“Whichever one you pick.” Steve stood up from the couch and stretched, he considered going for a run. But then there was banging on their front door. Steve and Tony shared a look and Steve went to go answer it. He tripped on at least five of Peter’s toys and made a mental note to clean up after he dealt with whoever was at the door. But when Steve swung the door open, he saw one of the most terrifying things of his life.
Natasha was crying.
“Nat?” Steve asked with wide eyes and she flung herself at him. She wrapped her arms tightly around his body and began crying into Steve’s chest. Steve slowly wrapped his arms around her and looked over at Tony, who looked just as confused as Steve was.
“What’s wrong?” Tony asked and she only cried harder.
“Nat you need to calm down. It’s going to be alright. What’s going on?” Steve asked gently.
“I screwed up Steve, I made a huge mistake.” She pulled away from Steve and began to pace around the apartment.
“What did you do?” Steve asked. She merely glared at one of Peter’s toys that she had stepped on. She was clearly frustrated with herself and seemed to be moving from all out panic to anger.
“you have to promise not to tell anyone!” She pleaded and Steve nodded.
“Okay.” Tony murmured softly, clearly just as worried as Steve was about her. Nat was usually level headed, the calm one out of all the Avengers.
“I slept with Clint.” Well, shit.
Tony had not expected Nat to say that. He had thought she’d killed someone, or been found by some Hydra agents, something other than what she had actually done.
“What do you mean you slept with Clint?” Tony asked, breaking the silence.
“Well, I went to his house to talk to him and he had just had a massive fight with Laura.” She was pacing again and Tony felt his stomach twisting and churning.
“And then?” Tony coaxed and she sighed, finally sitting down on their crappy couch. Tony did not miss the days when he used to sleep on that couch.
“And then I was comforting him and he’d said she’d ended it. So we started drinking and-“
“So you were both drunk?” Steve asked, that could be fixed. She could easily peg it as a drunken mistake, she didn’t need to be freaking out.
“No, I was slightly tipsy.” Usually she had her guard up, but Clint always managed to walk past any walls that Natasha managed to put up.
“And Clint?” She put her head in her hands.
“I think he was sober, I don’t know.” She was crying again.
“It’s going to be alright Nat, this isn’t the end of the world.” Tony sat down on the horrid couch and put an arm around her.
“I’ve never done something so stupid before.” Tony believed her. He couldn’t imagine Natasha making irrational decisions.
“We know.” Steve sat down on the other side of Nat, they sat in silence for a long time.
“Where’s Peter?” Nat asked suddenly, Tony was relieved he wasn’t here right now. He didn’t want Peter to see Nat like this. So scared.
“Next door.” Steve answered.
“Oh.”
“What did Clint say, afterwards?” Tony asked suddenly and she put her head in her hands.
“He said we’d talk later.” She muttered and Tony frowned. It wasn’t necessarily bad or good. It was neutral.
“Well at least he didn’t say it was a mistake.” Steve murmured and she groaned.
“I shouldn’t have let this happen.” She muttered, more to herself than to them.
“It’s going to be alright Nat.” Tony promised, but he couldn’t be sure. This could blow everything up.
Nat had been gone for about four hours now, yet Steve was still worried about her. He knew that she deeply cared about Clint. To her that was not a drunken mistake. And now she might lose Clint all together. Steve couldn’t imagine what that must feel like. Things had gone so smoothly when Steve and Tony had fallen for one another, there was always the fear that they’d screw everything up, but they had beaten the odds. They were getting married.
“She’ll be alright.” Tony was playing with Peter, moving around one of his toy cars.
“Nat never cries, she is never scared. This is terrifying her.” Steve thought about calling her but knew she wouldn’t answer.
“She and Clint are both adults. They can make their own decisions, their own mistakes. It takes two to tango Steve. He wanted it just as much as she did.” Steve frowned.
“But-“
“No buts! This time next week those two will be the best of friends and will have forgotten all about this.” Steve knew Tony didn’t truly believe that, but maybe it was true. Maybe they’d agree to pretend like it never happened, and everything would be fine. Unless they didn’t want to pretend like it never happened. This was such a complicated mess.
“I’m really worried about her.”
“I know.”
“this could mess up everything.”
“I know. But pick a tablecloth, it’ll make you feel better.” Tony smiled and Steve rolled his eyes.
“Nope, you are the one that will be picking a tablecloth.” Tony rolled his eyes but nodded.
“It was worth a shot.”
Finally it felt like Steve’s life was coming together. Not only did he get the kid, he got the guy. He got Tony Stark. He’d seen it from the beginning, he had seen a future with Tony. Now he got to live it. But he was worried about Nat, who didn’t get to be with Clint. The person she could see her future with. Nat had avoided Clint for three days. Not that he’d exactly gone looking for her. Steve had told her to simply suck it up and go talk to him. If she couldn’t talk about it then she really shouldn’t be doing it.
“You’re such a dad.” She had said to him. That made Steve smile, he was always worried that he was going to be a bad father. That Peter would one day grow up to hate him. Steve made a promise to himself to never let that happen. He would be here, by Tony and Peter’s sides, no matter what. No one and nothing would come between them. He paced around the apartment, which felt smaller and smaller with every passing day. It was strange to imagine not living in this apartment. But Peter was getting bigger and the amount of toys he had was borderline ridiculous. They needed a bigger place. Tony had eventually settled on a tablecloth. Steve had merely smirked and then told him to pick an envelope for the invites. Tony had glared at him for at least five minutes. Tony was presently with Peter in his workshop. He was taking more tests, seeing if anything had changed with Peter. Steve doubted it, but Tony liked to check up on Peter every couple months. It was probably for the best. Steve began cleaning up the apartment when Natasha finally called him.
“What’s happening?” Steve asked, continuing to put away some of Peter’s toys.
“Well we talked. Sort of.”
“what does sort of mean?” Steve asked and stood on a lego. He swore and Nat remained silent for a while.
“Did you really just say fuck?” she asked and Steve rolled his eyes.
“What does sort of mean?” Steve repeated, suddenly frustrated.
“It means we sort of talked and then we definitely shouted and there was definitely the word mistake and I hate you thrown in there and now we’re not talking.” Steve groaned, that was the opposite of what Natasha had planned.
“tell me the whole story.” Steve murmured.
“I said I wanted to talk. He said he knew it was a mistake. That he was back with Laura. She already knew and said she was fine with it. I said I wasn’t fine with it and that’s when we started arguing.” Steve could imagine Nat shrugging her shoulders. Steve tried to imagine how she must be feeling, but he couldn’t come up with the right emotion. Was this how Bucky felt when Steve had chosen Tony? Was this how Tony had felt when he thought Steve was going to choose Bucky?
“I’m sorry Nat.” was all Steve managed.
“Don’t be. It’s probably for the best. We’ll be back to normal in a week or two.” That was the part Steve hated the most. Knowing that Clint and Nat would just slip back into their old ways. They’d pretend like it had never happened. Rather than actually talk through it. Steve made another promise to himself that he would always communicate with Tony, he would never shut Tony out. Communication really was key in a relationship.
Peter seemed fine. Normal. His test results were identical to three months ago. Peter had fallen asleep on a couch in Tony’s workshop. He took a photo and sent it to Steve.
Adorable. Was Steve’s response.
Do you want me to pick up dinner on the way home? Thinking Chinese.
Yes! Also I think we should get a house.
Tony read the text at least six times before responding.
A house?
The apartment is just so small. It was fine when Peter was a baby, but he is getting older. Plus, wouldn’t it be nice to have a bigger space?
It would be nice. Really nice. Tony thought about it. A house. He knew it would happen eventually, especially as Peter got older. He found himself nodding, liking the idea more and more with each passing second.
Ok.
Ok?
Ok.
And Tony was grinning. He wasn’t sure how he had gotten so lucky to have both Steve and Peter. But he was sure damn grateful that he did get to have both of them. He looked back at Peter and had the same thought he’d been having for three years. My son.
happen eventually, especially as Peter got older. He found himself nodding, liking the idea more and more with each passing second.
Ok.
Ok?
Ok.
And Tony was grinning. He wasn’t sure how he had gotten so lucky to have both Steve and Peter. But he was sure damn grateful that he did get to have both of them. He looked back at Peter and had the same thought he’d been having for three years.
My son.
And soon enough, Tony would be allowed to look at Steve and think;
my husband.
#superfamily#super husbands#stony#stony fic#Avengers#The Avengers#avengers fic#avengers fluff#avengers angst#peterparker#tony stark#tony stark rogers#Steve Rogers#steve stark rogers#Iron Man#captain america#we are a family fic#wade wilson#spiderman#deadpool#spideypool
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Okay, so my mom promised that I can get a ball python once we move into our house in January, I'm 13 now. I know snakes, especially BPs can live a heck of a long time. College will be an issue. Im hoping that I would be able to teach my grandmother, dad, and sister to take care of him. But knowing me I won't be able to sleep without him. Do you happen to know any colleges that either allow reptiles or let freshman live off campus in the USA that does an engineering major? Or links?? Thanks!
Hello! It took me eight days to get to this and I apologize for that. At least you get an answer that is long enough that perhaps I was literally typing on it for eight straight days nonstop? Ha ha, just kidding, I type fast. This took me only 94 straight hours of typing tops.
I am… going to be the annoying, boring adult here, and basically caution you against, like, almost everything in your entire ask. On two fronts: the “get a snake now” thing, and the “pick a college for snake” thing.
The now thing: if you don’t already have a family member On Board With Snakes, then I would recommend against getting one any time soon. I am doing the math in my head here, and I recognize that the idea of waiting until college, or maybe even after college, equates to “please wait another approximately 50-75% of the entire time that you have existed on this earth so far, and THEN you can realize your dream, maybe”. But…
Like you said, beeps can live a long time. Theoretical Noodle would almost certainly still be alive and still a young thing when it’s time for you to go to college. And if you knew already that someone else would be cool with caring for him or her – warming up and feeding the dead r.odents, cleaning up the poops, cleaning out the occasional massive spatter of fluids that used to be inside of the dead r.odents – well, if they were already lined up, you’d be bringing your new pet into a situation that you can assume to be stable. Even if you had to leave them home when you went to college, you could be confident that they were getting the care they deserved.
But it sounds like nobody else is completely on board yet, and that would mean that the situation isn’t stable. You’d be bringing a tiny innocent creature into a situation where you can’t be sure that they would get that proper care longer than about five years. And maybe you can convince someone, but maybe you can’t. Or someone else does agree to take over, but they don’t have the passion and the love for that animal, and that would almost certainly lead to a lower standard of care.
It doesn’t have to be something big and obvious like “I got tired of it so I dumped it off at the animal shelter”, or even like “whoops I left the cage open and the snake got out, oh well not a big deal right?” (that one, I saw that someone had run into not long ago while they were away for a month or so). It could just be that the person who takes over is not really feeling it, and so snakey never gets fed quite as often as they would like. Or their tank never gets cleaned quite as often as maybe you’d clean it. Or maybe the water dish goes empty a while before somebody notices, repeatedly.
Humans usually don’t do as good a job at something they aren’t passionate about, and that is NOT me saying your family members are bad people, just that they’re human. It’s a lot easier to dance the r.odent corpse around for a half-hour straight, singing a little song in a squeaky voice in case that makes the meal more appealing, if you don’t absolutely love that noodly little buttface to death. Then when you give up and have to throw the r.odent out, which means taking it to the outside trash can in the dark because you don’t want it rotting in your kitchen trash can all night, the love makes it just a little more tolerable.
And then, at last, the pick a college thing: I don’t have any info on what might be a good college to look at based on the criteria you mentioned (I am old and my only children are the scaly types, so it’s totally out of my wheelhouse these days). But you’re going to be spending 4+ years of your life and however many thousands of dollars (assuming no fancy full-ride scholarships) on a degree!
“Should” is a strong word, I don’t want to “should” you here, but picking your college based on something like (has good program for major I want + I can afford it without working eight jobs + I like the school/campus culture itself in general + they actually let me in which is not 100% in my control unless I have straight As and enough extracurriculars to form an entire other human out of) will probably result in a successful academic career. If “will allow me to have a snake” gets thrown into the mix, that could make the choice a whole lot more limited.
Maybe it turns out that Basically Perfect For Your Academic Wants University will also let you take your pet with you, but what if it doesn’t? Will you settle? Will you go to Kind Of Crappy And Also A Dump Polytech because it allows reptiles?
It’s 100% your choice, and I, a random person on the Internet, cannot (and should not, this is strong enough for a should) tell you how to prioritize your future. But you asked, so you get my recommendation! Waiting is super hard, and I already finished my waiting so it’s easy for me to just go “bluh bluh just wait a thousand years and then all snakes will come to you”. But that’s still what I got.
Thank you for asking! I hope you do not regret it too much now that your eyes have presumably fallen out of your head from Too Many Words.
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Bluehost Review – 7 Pros & 4 Cons of Bluehost (Server Speed Tested!)
Bluehost
https://www.bluehost.com/
Bluehost is a fantastic choice for beginners who want to build their first website for their businesses or blogs. Their onboarding process and automatic WordPress installation makes everything feel very easy to use. They may not provide the best value or service, but their product just works.
If you’re flopping about, unsure whether or not to use Bluehost as your web hosting provider, worry not – you’ve stumbled on to the right page.
Here at Bitcatcha, we’re a little obsessed with web hosting (our doctors say it’s borderline unhealthy).
We’ve gone ahead and gotten ourselves a Bluehost account, run some performance tests on their shared hosting plan, and we’re ready to present to you the most definitive Bluehost review you’ll find on the internet.
A Little Bit About Bluehost
Founded by a very young Matt Heaton and Danny Ashworth all the way back in 2003, Bluehost has been around a LONG time.
They’re practically dinosaurs in the industry, but that ain’t a bad thing – having been around for so long means that they’ve learned a thing or two about web hosting, and are able to provide their users with a kick-ass user experience.
For a web hosting provider that’s known and used by people all over the world, Bluehost has but 1 datacenter, which is located in the US. That datacenter powers all of their clients’ websites, which adds up to a whopping 2 million, and is growing by the thousands each day!
Hot Damn!
They obviously made quite an impression in the market, because, in just 7 short years, they got the attention of web hosting giant Endurance International Group, which proceeded to acquire them into the EIG group of companies.
With the support of EIG, Bluehost managed to substantially grow their once small team to a family that’s 750 people large, allowing them to provide much needed round-the-clock support for their customers!
Not impressive enough for you?
Then check this out – Bluehost is also one of the 3 web hosting providers that are actually recommended by WordPress!
If you’re wondering why that’s impressive, it’s because 30% of sites in the entire world wide web is actually powered by WordPress. In other words, they’re the rock stars of the internet and getting an endorsement from them is similar to getting your workout gear endorsed by Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.
Now that you’re acquainted with Bluehost, let’s find out why, in our humble opinion, Bluehost is a pretty strong web hosting provider!
7 Great Reasons To Pick Bluehost!
1. Bluehost Is Surprisingly Easy To Use
If you’ve ever built a website before and used a web hosting service provider with a crappy interface, you’ll understand the pain of logging into the dashboard and… not knowing what to do.
Bluehost surprised us with their onboarding process. After completing the registration process, we logged in to the dashboard and before we knew it, clicked next a few times and then, *poof* magic – WordPress was already installed and ready to go.
But pictures speak a thousand words, so here are some to show you what really went down after logging in.
Bluehost will begin by asking you a series of questions about what kind of site you’ll be creating. Select an option from the drop-down menu, and hit continue. Easy-peasy.
They’ll then ask what kind of site you’ll be creating, whether it’s a blog, e-Commerce site, or a niche website selling poop scented wrapping paper.
Them pesky buggers will want to know more about your site, but worry not, because they have your best interests at heart. Name your site, think of a tagline, and rate your website building level on their noob detector scale.
All you have to do next is pick a theme you like, and then boom, WordPress is automatically installed just like that! No need to worry about getting it installed in the wrong folder, or drastically messing something up.
Bluehost will take care of the backend, while you just need to worry about customizing your site and making it look pretty.
If you’re new to site building, I’m pretty sure you have no problems at all creating your site with Bluehost. Even those of us that are a little more seasoned will appreciate how convenient their dashboard is to use.
Look out how beautiful that custom cPanel interface looks. None of that confusing looking dated mess that comes with stock cPanel.
2. They’re Surprisingly Fast Around The World!
According to thinkwithgoogle, fast site load speeds are important for online businesses to be successful, and server response time plays a HUGE role in getting websites to load up fast.
However, with merely 1 datacenter located in the USA, we didn’t think Bluehost would do very well when put through our proprietary server speed test.
Using our test site hosted on their basic plan, we went to town and started testing their response times – boy, we were dead wrong.
Average Speed: 153 ms
The American hosting provider responded exceptionally well, hitting speeds that are WAY faster than Google’s recommended 200ms in all countries, except for Bangalore.
They’re obviously fastest in the USA as the datacenter is located there, but they’re no slouch in countries on the other side of the world like Singapore, Sydney and Japan!
With an average worldwide score of 153ms, Bluehost is one of the fastest A-ranked hosting providers we’ve ever had the pleasure of reviewing. You can rest assured that no matter where your target audience resides in the world, Bluehost will be able to deliver!
Well… except if your audience is in India. You might want to check out our piece on the best web hosting for India instead.
LEARN MORE @ BLUEHOST OFFICIAL
* User-friendly hosting with great speed at an affordable rate!
3. They’ve Got High-Performance Servers
Those of you with plans to run large scale e-Commerce websites or reddit-like forums would be happy to know that Bluehost offers High-Performance Servers that are suitable for your needs.
Why is this important?
Well, with shared web hosting, the purpose of the server is literally in the name – you’re sharing the space with other users, which helps reduce the cost.
However, some users might accidentally (or intentionally) use up way more resources than allocated, which means that everyone else sharing the server with that user will experience site slowdowns – sometimes their sites won’t even load at all.
With High-Performance Servers, Bluehost allocates fewer users per server, and each user is given a file count of 300,000 – this means more computing resources per user, consistent site load speeds, and less downtime caused by rogue users!
BUT!
As it is with all things good, there’s always a catch.
Their High-Performance servers are only available with their Pro plan, which is a whole lot pricier than the rest of their shared web hosting plans.
Guess if you want good performance, you’ve gotta pay for it.
Quite frankly, we have every confidence in their servers. Our test site is hosted only with their Basic plan, and even then, the uptime for it has been 100% since April 2018!
Uptime since April 2018
99.98%
* Bluehost Basic Plan Uptime - tracked with uptimerobot.com
If their shared hosting servers can produce such uptimes, we can easily expect the same from their High-Performance servers.
4. Fantastic Security Features
When we say security, we don’t mean features that just keeps your website safe from those fiendish, ne’er do well hackers.
We’re talking about security in terms of peace of mind, and keeping spam away from the sanctuary of your brand new email inbox.
Let’s look into peace of mind first.
You don’t want to spend days, weeks, months, customizing and tweaking your business website to get it to look perfect and suited to rank on the front of page Google, only to load it up to discover that someone screwed the pooch and your entire website is gone.
For this, Bluehost provides their users with CodeGuard basic – at $2.99 a month.
CodeGuard Basic
The name sounds cool, but it’s actually just a fancy name they came up with for their daily backup service. It’s not bad at all – monitoring your website/database frequently, notifying you if there are any changes, and automatically performing backups.
The basic version provides 1GB storage space, daily backup and monitoring, and 3 restorations a month.
If you need more, CodeGuard comes in Professional, Premium, and Enterprise versions too, but be prepared to pay higher prices for those.
SpamExperts
We assure you, Bluehost won’t be sending someone that can tell you the nuances between different types of pork used in SPAM products.
Instead, SpamExperts is their term for an advanced email filter. It scans incoming emails for spam, viruses, phishing, and other email-related attacks by spammers, and filters them with a rockin’ 99.98% accuracy, all before it reaches your inbox.
Basically, it helps your mailbox stay squeaky clean and junk-free.
SiteLock
In terms of actually protecting your website, Bluehost comes with a basic firewall that offers a minimal level of protection against external threats.
However, If you want enhanced protection, you can get it in the form of SiteLock.
SiteLock comes in three tiers: Essential, Prevent, and Prevent Plus.
With Essential, you’ll get to enjoy automatic Malware removal, which does exactly nothing against DDOS attacks or anything major.
With Prevent, the security level is upped a little with Automatic Malware Removal, DDoS Protection, 6-hour response time and….Image Optimization. Quite frankly, I don’t know what image optimization has to do with security, but it’s a feature I won’t be complaining about.
Prevent Plus does everything Prevent can, but with the added benefit of having daily scan frequency.
SiteLock is good and all, but the thing is, they all come as an add-on, meaning we’re gonna need to fork out more money to enjoy it. Come on Bluehost, you can afford to give your customers a little extra security for free!
5. They’ve Got A Buffet Of Benefits
Gone are the days where you have to carefully plan out the number of sites you’re planning to launch, and the kind of resources needed to run all of it effectively.
Bluehost’s shared hosting plans come with all sorts of benefits, and best of all, almost everything is unlimited! We’re talking:
· Unlimited websites
· Unlimited SSD storage
· Unlimited parked domains
· Unlimited subdomains
· Unmetered bandwidth
You are basically free to create as many sites as you want with them! And you won’t have to worry about the number of visitors to your site!
Be wary though – having too many visitors at the same time might take up too much resources, and Bluehost is notorious for deactivating/deleting rogue sites.
6. Support Responds Very Fast!
One of the most infuriating things in life is waiting for support to respond to you, especially if your site needs attention NOW.
While we were setting up our test site, we were quite pleased to find that support responded via Live Chat very quickly. We’re accustomed to waiting at least 15 minutes for live chat support staff to respond, but the Bluehost support team consistently responded in less than 5 minutes.
We didn’t try phone or email support, but with live chat responding as quick as they do, we hardly think that those methods of support are necessary, although it’s nice to have in case of emergencies.
You won’t have to worry about support in different time zones either, because Bluehost’s support is available 24/7.
Excellent job, team!
7. Freebies That Matter
Some companies will entice you to sign up with their service with shallow free gifts. We’re talking about those that market regular services as “free”, such as “free” 24/7 support, or “free” WordPress installation.
Not Bluehost.
With the all-American web hosting service provider, you’ll actually get freebies that’ll make a difference in your bank account.
With every shared hosting plan purchased, Bluehost will throw in a domain name, free for the first year. To put things in perspective for you, domain names can cost anywhere from $8 to $872 million – yes you read that right. Here’s proof.
Aside from that, you’ll also get the enjoy free SSL – now this might not be much, but every little bit definitely helps to make a difference to the small business owner!
SEE FULL FEATURES @ BLUEHOST OFFICIAL
* Unlimited website, SSD, domains, and more!
4 Disadvantages Of Bluehost
They say that every rose has its thorn. Well, turns out Bluehost is quite thorny.
1. Bluehost Only Has 1 Datacenter
We mentioned previously that we were quite impressed by how fast Bluehost’s 1 datacenter performed, and we still are.
However, every millisecond counts when it comes to site load speed, and we know they can actually perform WAY better if they had datacenters in other continents to support audiences living further away.
They might have one of the best worldwide average speeds among all the web hosting services we’ve reviewed, but if another hosting provider like SiteGround has a datacenter in Asia, it’s a given that sites will load up faster for target audiences located there.
2. Untrained Trainees
I hate to say this because we all start out somewhere, but you really have to be wary of support that are a little wet behind the ears.
Bluehost doesn’t really make an effort to hide that they outsource their support team to India, which isn’t really a big deal anyway. I don’t mind, as long as they’re efficient and fast.
But what I do have a problem is incorrect advice given by trainees.
While setting up our test site, we asked the support team one really simple question:
“Does Bluehost provide us with an Uptime Guarantee?”
The support didn’t know what an uptime guarantee was.
Fine, maybe it got lost in translation. We explained what we were looking for and their reply was YES, Bluehost has an uptime guarantee!
So we asked him to point us to the terms of the guarantee and after going through it, we discovered that the provider does not actually guarantee uptime.
Lucky that this is just a minor issue. God forbid this young support chap gives the wrong advice regarding something major and causes some real damage to our sites.
Bluehost, if you’re reading this, PLEASE train your trainees. This is not acceptable.
3. No Uptime Guarantee
After ranting about it in the earlier point, I can’t really not talk about the lack of uptime guarantee here.
Downtime is quite detrimental to any website. You lose potential sales or conversions if your site is experiencing downtime, and if it’s consistent enough, search engines might not even bother listing your site.
This is why an uptime guarantee is important.
It shows you that the provider is committed to keeping your site up and running, and they’re willing to compensate customers if they face downtimes of below a certain percentage.
Not having one is a giant red flag in our books.
That being said, we have to give Bluehost props – their uptime is actually fantastic, as evidenced by the uptime data collected from our test site.
For the lazy, it’s been at 100% since April 2008. Quite an impressive feat!
4. Dodgy Checkout Practices
Pretty sure everyone reading this will be familiar with the sleazy used car salesman that tries to slyly upsell you things you don’t really need just to make a higher sale.
Making a purchase with Bluehost feels a little bit like we’re dealing with people of that sort.
Upon checkout, the box for SEO tools and Sitelock will be checked, which pushes the price up to close to $60 a year.
These things are nice to have but are completely unnecessary, and unsuspecting buyers might just click next and make the purchase unknowingly – which happened to me.
Make sure you uncheck these boxes before making your purchase (unless you actually want these features).
VPS Hosting
If you’re in need of VPS hosting, Bluehost’s virtual private servers are sure to please. Supported with SSD storage, you’ll enjoy all the power, flexibility and control you’ll need for your VPS needs.
Plans range from $18.99 – $59.99 a month.
Dedicated Hosting
Bluehost’s dedicated hosting plans allow users to have unrestricted access to their servers. With their industry-leading robust platform, you’ll get to enjoy powerful flexible hosting at decent prices.
Their dedicated hosting plans range from $79.99 – $119.99 per month.
GET 33% OFF @ BLUEHOST BASIC (FOR $3.95/MO)
* Price shown is based on 36-month subscription. ** 30-day money back guarantee!
Verdict: Bluehost Is Good, But Not The Best Choice!
Just because we didn’t pick Bluehost to be the best web hosting brand, doesn’t mean that they’re not a good service provider.
They’re actually pretty decent, providing their users with fast enough speeds worldwide to ensure their users’ sites are loaded fast enough to generate a healthy amount of sales.
With superb useability and great UX, Bluehost is fantastic for beginners. Their WordPress recommendation should speak volumes about their service.
One thing we need to mention is that Bluehost is still using cPanel, which is great news for those of us that are accustomed to using it. Since cPanel increased their prices, most web hosting providers have decided to dump them, but so far there seems to be no indication of Bluehost dropping cPanel.
However, the lack of an uptime guarantee got us pretty peeved, as most major providers have the balls to provide some sort of compensation if their users’ sites are down for a certain amount of time.
The very fact that the companies are willing to put their money where their mouth is, inspires confidence. Bluehost does exactly the opposite without an uptime guarantee… what if the websites hosted with them go down for an entire week?
Anyone can promise to “strive to maintain network and server uptime” but it means completely jack if they can’t sack up and foot the bill when shit hits the fan.
However, credit where credit is due – we’ve never had a problem with Bluehost’s actual uptime before. As a matter of fact, the uptime has been 100% on our test site since April 2018!
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Chapter One: Occult (Script)
Apologies for the delay in getting the scripts up! This is my first time writing a script & it probably shows, so I wanted to do more editing of them to fit Real Formatting Standards, but then I kept not having enough time to do that (because NaNoWriMo prep, freelance writer, second podcast in the works, etc.) so I decided not to make the perfect the enemy of the accessible and just put the scripts up as they are.
Anyways, the script for episode one is behind the cut, obviously spoilers!
NARRATOR: I don't know if I'm dead, or losing it, or what the hell, but I am definitely not okay with it.
(Narrator draws a deep breath)
I guess I should start at the beginning.
I woke up this morning, and it was like every other day. Hit snooze a few times, wolfed down some oatmeal, rushed out the door. Gave a shy little head-nod to that cute neighbor on the way out - the usual. Of course, she couldn't be more oblivious to my existence, but I probably have bigger things to worry about right now, anyways.
I got on the subway, made it just in time. It was packed - the usual morning rush. And I swear, I have never had my toes stepped on more in my life. That probably should have been my first clue that something was up. Everyone hates public transportation and nobody wants to talk during our shared misery, so it’s not like awkward silence is a new thing. But when you get stepped on six times in five minutes and no one - not just the stepper, but no one - around you acknowledges your "excuse me"s or your "ow"s or your general existence, something is a little off. Of course, I didn't think anything of it at the time, just that there were more assholes per capita than usual today.
I suffered through the obnoxious subway ride and heaved a sigh of relief when I was finally out of that tin-can and back on the street. By this point, I was running a little late, which meant I was speedwalking down the sidewalk like an overcaffeinated soccer mom. Caught the door closing behind someone else into my office building, got past the badge-checker, dealt with more awkward silence and lack of personal space during the endless elevator ride, and finally, I was there - only three minutes late.
(Narrator’s voice starts to shake)
But something wasn't right. By this point, the frazzled shit-I'm-gonna-be-late feeling was wearing off, which meant I was a little bit more aware of my surroundings. And even in my relatively small office, nobody was making eye contact or saying hi or...anything. Granted, I’m not about to win any popularity awards there, but you know, people say hi!
My first thought was that word of layoffs had come down from the head honchos - but everyone else was talking to each other. There wasn't an eerie silence over the entire office or anything - people were just ignoring me. My next thought was that my recent work had been found wanting, then that news had made it around, and this was the standard passive-aggressive office politics results.
Either way, whatever. As far as I could tell, there was nothing I can do about it now except for get my nose back to the godforsaken grindstone. I went to my desk and that douchebag from marketing is standing directly in front of it. Josh? James? Something like that. Very aware that I might be skating on thin ice right, I tried to be polite to him, even though he's one of those guys that thinks he's always entitled to everyone's time and energy.
"Excuse me," I said. And he keeps talking. "Uh, I need to get to my desk, so if you could just..."
And this motherfucker just kept talking! He was acting like he hadn't heard a word I said, rambling on about the KPI reports or whatever to Carol, like he thought it would get him laid. Even though everyone in the office could tell him the chances of that are so far gone that “lost cause” doesn't even begin to describe it.
By this point, I was fed up with everything and trying my best not to completely lose it. I opened my mouth to say something more strongly worded than "excuse me,” while he’s still prattling on without pause. Then, he said, "Your buddy isn't here yet, huh?" and gestured to my chair.
Carol, completely uninterested in this entire ordeal, glances at my desk for a split second before she replied, "Nope. Guess she's out sick or something,” and continued typing away.
At this point, I finally lost it and shouted, "YOU IDIOTS, I AM STANDING RIGHT HERE." My voice echoed off the crappy ceiling tiles and around the cubicles...but nobody did a damn thing. I sighed, pinched my nose, and said, slightly calmer this time, "Okay. If this is an April Fool's joke, it's the best one ever, but it's also actually way late, and I have work to do, so can we give up the ghost on this stupid prank?"
(Narrator sighs, sniffles)
And nobody does anything. This is the point when it starts to sink in that something is actually wrong. Nobody has that good of a poker face, especially not Carol - the woman can't tell a knock-knock joke without giggling at her own punchline. I reached out and grabbed her shoulder and gave it a shake, and she does nothing. She moved - I could grab her and move her, this wasn't a Moaning Myrtle situation where I passed through her - but it was like she had no realization that her body was moving. She kept typing away, not missing a beat. The douchebag from marketing was still rambling on.
(Narrator's voice starts to crack, she's holding back tears)
I backed away from them, trying not to trip over my own feet in my panic, and ran towards the office door. I stopped at the front desk to wave my hands in front of our receptionist and shout in his face. It didn’t make a difference - the phone conversation he was engrossed in continued without interruption or acknowledgement.
I barely made it out of the building before I went into full-fledged panic attack mode right there on the sidewalk. We're talking hyperventilating, sobbing, talking to myself, on my hands and knees, on the cold sidewalk. The whole time, strangers parted around me like a rock in a river. Nobody walked on me, everyone gave me a solid foot of space, but nobody saw or heard or acknowledged me either. After a while, I cried myself out and the black tunnel-vision started to fade, as my breathing evened out.
(Narrator takes a moment, shaky breath, sniffle)
And I just...somehow made my way back here. The trip home was kind of a blur, I'm not entirely sure how I did it. You know that space after you have an epic meltdown, where you're kind of numb and feel like you're watching everything happening from a spot just above your shoulders? The same thing happened when my grandpa died. It was completely unexpected. I answered the phone with no idea what I was about to hear, and my mom asked me if I was okay three times before she let me hang up, because I wasn't crying. I just went blank.
Of course, once I hung up the phone, I sobbed for the next hour. But after that, the rest of the day, I was in that weird space in-between the panic attack and daily life, where you have a buffer that you didn't want or ask for, and you might as well be walking around encased in styrofoam for all you can see or hear or feel or think.
Anyways. I guess that's not really relevant. The point being, I made it back home okay. And I still don't know what's going on. I don't even know where to start. I'm still here. I can still touch and smell and move things. It's just that nobody else can see that, and I don't know why.
What do you Google for this, "why am I invisible?" (Okay, you got me. I did try that. It's all metaphorical essays about social anxiety and bad poetry and fedora-wearing dudes whining about not getting laid. No dude, I mean I am actually invisible. Not just to the girl I wish would notice me, to everyone.) There's no WebMD symptom entry for "I'm not incorporeal, but I might as well be as far as everyone else is concerned.”
I tried calling my mom. That was before the fruitless googling. The phone went to voicemail right away. When I left a barely-not-sobbing message, the machine kept telling me there was an error. That robotic voice with the same inflection every time, repeating over and over again,
(mimics phone message voice) "I'm sorry, your message could not be delivered. Please hang up or press pound to try again." I got through three tries before I threw my phone at the couch and collapsed on top of it.
(Narrator sighs, calmer this time, completely wore out both by this experience and by retelling it)
What do you do after that? The internet has no answers and neither does my mom, apparently. That's a situation I'm completely unprepared for.
And - I don’t know. My first thought - well, fourth or sixth or tenth thought, after everything else - was that somebody needs to hear this story. I have to document this somehow. If I stay semi-scientific about it, maybe that will keep the panic at bay. Like that old anxiety drill - name the five things you can see and four things you can hear and three things you can smell, and so on. Keep myself grounded, so I have a better chance of survival, yeah?
And I'm not a writer, not by a long shot, so I picked up my phone (which was fine despite the temper tantrum, thankfully) and started recording and here we are. I have no idea what I'm going to do with this recording when it's done. Based on my experiences so far, I'm not even sure anyone else will be able to hear it. But the recording still seems to be going and there's that little heartbeat-style line going up and down and up and down, so at least my phone can hear me.
(Narrator laughs, kind of hysterical)
If only Siri could give me some answers. "Hey Siri, tell me why I'm literally fucking invisible, can you do that for me?"
(Siri ding in background, narrator laughs again, slightly more genuine this time, still giggling when she starts speaking again)
Oh my god, not really, Siri. Stop.
(Siri "off" ding)
Anyways. That leaves us. It's just you and me, potentially nonexistent listeners. I'll try and record another update soon to...let you know I'm still alive and holding it together, to whatever extent both of those things are true. Stay tuned, I guess.
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How could I possibly not know my attachment style until I was a teenager, you ask? Well, mainly because I had nobody to get that attached to. My mother likes to tell people the story of my first steps. I was sitting on her lap one day at a family gathering, while she was chatting with the other adults, and I let it be known that I wanted a toy that was across the room. Nobody could be arsed to get it for me, or even walk over there and crouch beside it to encourage me to go get it myself. Eventually, I got tired of squalling, squirmed free, and toddled over to get it on my own. No stumbling, no falling; I just walked over, plopped down, and focused on my toy to the exclusion of all else. She thinks this is an adorable story. It would be if it were a case of 'took our eyes off the baby for two seconds and look what happened'. It was not. This was my mother's parenting technique through my entire childhood: Whenever the baby wanted something inconvenient, ignore her until she took care of herself. She's not a sociopath -- she was good with food, water, shelter, clothes, school, making sure I didn't just drop dead, etc. But any level of psychosocial interaction beyond what a pet might need was inconsistent at best. The most praise I ever got was when I was "independent", i.e., didn't bug her for shit. Dad followed Mom's lead, and to be brutally honest, the two of them were actually an improvement over the families they'd come from. Unsurprisingly, my mother and I got along increasingly poorly as I grew up. By the time I was a teenager, I could articulate the feeling that she wasn't listening to me when I complained, but it didn't do me any good. She could parrot back the words I'd just said, it just didn't appear to mean anything to her. At some point she'd just snap and shout, "What do you want me to do about it?" The actual answer was, "sympathize and comfort me," but by that point I'd been without it for so long I didn't know that was an option. I'd try to think up some practical solutions, find none, sullenly admit the answer was, "Nothing, I guess," and retreat to my room. As far as I can tell, she considered this to be her winning the fight. There wasn't anyone outside the family for me to get attached to, either. I didn't have a best friend as a kid. I didn't know this; there was a girl in my grade whose mother hung out with my mother, and I was informed that she was my best friend. In retrospect, she didn't like me much and wished I'd go away, but she had been ordered to play with me. Her mother was the kind of woman who enforced the 'no squirming while I do your hair' rule by clonking her on the head with the hairbrush, so I'm not surprised she did it. When I was eight-ish, I bought a set of those 'best friend' necklackes that are each one half of a heart. She flat refused to wear hers. I don't recall my mother having much reaction to this; I may not have bothered to tell her. Mainly what this taught me was that my affection was a goddamn nuisance, and if I wanted to make 'friends' I should probably not say anything about it. They would be, at best, confused. I got innumerable more lessons in same throughout grade school. I tried berating myself into not caring so much, but that didn't work very well, so I took the compromise position of never talking about it. I still have favorite people, I just generally keep it to myself. I can be glad to see someone without making them take time out of their day to deal with it. It was not until I was a freshman in high school that I met other humans who consistently acted like they fucking liked me. I still see people complaining that online socializing isn't "real" socializing, and I say a hearty FUCK YOU!, because without the internet (or at least crappy 14.4 mbps modems) I would not have had any friends ever, least of all at a time in my life where I was becoming increasingly stressed and despondent. My school district set up an online BBS that was ostensibly for "homework help", although I don't think I ever saw a single post in that forum. What we actually used it for was play-by-post role-playing games. A couple of guys set up a Star Trek game, and I wanted to join, so I sat down to read the background docs. I found them woefully inadequate. I was even less diplomatic as a teenager than I am now, so I wrote the guy who posted them and went, "You call that tech?" and he wrote back, "You think you can do better, you do it." I owned all of the published technical manuals for the various Trek series at that point, and I did in fact think I could do better, so I did. Bizarrely enough, this made us friends. Nerd lyfe, yo. I ended up fairly close with the two guys who ran the game, and with a girl they knew, all three from a neighboring high school in the district. I handled this very poorly. I had no idea how to cope with people who actually cared about my mental and emotional well-being. It had nothing to do with how they were behaving; they did successfully transmit the feeling that they cared about me, very much. I just didn't trust my read of the situation, at all. I felt as though I were on a tightrope the entire time, wondering how much they would tolerate from me before they snapped and admitted I was demanding too much attention, and told me to sod off. This was not their view of the situation at all; they uniformly thought my parents were horrible, and probably wished they could do more to get me away from them. By this point I had started having what in hindsight were clearly uncontrollable panic attacks, which my parents responded to by ignoring them. Literally -- I can clearly remember sitting at one of the computer in the living room, sobbing hysterically while I typed at one of said friends in a chat window, both parents within sight of this and having absolutely no discernible reaction whatsoever. I took to doing this more and more, dumping my irrational, incomprehensible feelings out into text, because for some reason they all put up with it. I always expected that one day they would just tell me to STFU, but they never did. One of the guys in the group had two sisters and therefore some idea of what you do about crying women, which was mainly hug them until they fixed themselves. He was very patient, and eventually became my first real 'best friend', a thing that surprised only me. When I was around seventeen, I was badly broken by the realization that he cared about me in a way that my own family did not, and that if push ever came to shove, my family could go fuck themselves, because I'd side with him. I remember sitting in the front seat of his car very late one night, babbling uncontrollably at him about this epiphany. I have no idea what he made of this, but he did continue to talk to me for several years afterwards, so it apparently wasn't anything bad. I still deeply mistrust the instinct that says someone is aiming to be that kind of friend to me. It is rare, and I try not to let myself want that too much, because it gets me into trouble. It involves a kind of emotional intimacy that other people view as inherently romantic -- I don't, and I cannot for the life of me comprehend why other people do, but it provokes a lot of jealousy in the wrong situation. Losing friends is bad to begin with, but that one is especially ruinous for me. From my point of view, it means I have to give up a connection to another human being because a third party has arbitrarily decreed I don't get to have it. The jealous SO unilaterally declares we're in a competition I don't want or understand, and I automatically lose. It scares me on a par with what I think normal people would feel at the prospect that their sibling had married a crazy person and would never speak to them again. The reward has to be pretty big for me to take the risk. This specific thing is the other reason (aside from a general lack of spoons and extroverted emotional energy) that I have decided I do not do closed monogamous relationships. There are seriously people who consider that kind of friendship to be 'emotional infidelity'. You can't see me right now, but if I were rolling my eyes any harder I'd risk retinal detachment. If this counts as cheating in a monogamous relationship, then clearly I am not natively monogamous, and I should not be in those. I really need that kind of emotional scaffolding, in various degrees from multiple people, to provide stability in my life, and I have no family capable of providing it. Any partner who told me, "you're too close to that other person, give it up or this relationship is over," would be immediately and permanently broken up with. from Blogger http://ift.tt/2yMkyFE via IFTTT -------------------- Enjoy my writing? Consider becoming a Patron, subscribing via Kindle, or just toss a little something in my tip jar. Thanks!
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Replies!
A bunch o’ them. Some are old because I’ve been bad. :(
For @getmygameon, @penig, @shaonharryandpannisim, @didilysims, @pensblr, @esotheria-sims, @celebkiriedhel, @leavealight-on, @sim-boo, @cedanyblee, @holleyberry, annnnnnd @clericalrodent...
Omg a pregnant sim that knows how to feed themselves. Its going to snow o.o
I dunno, all my Sims take pretty good care of themselves in terms of filling their own motives as well as gaining skill points. It’s probably because of the mods I have that nuke a portion of the behaviors they can engage in, so that they are more directed towards things that actually do something for them. Also, I’ve made lots of objects have autonomous interactions, so it keeps them busy and happy. :) Of course, it makes things like Asylum Challenges a little less fun, but I generally prefer to have Sims that I don’t have to micromanage, as I’m mostly a hands-off sort of player.
penig replied to your photoset “Cherry, nesting. In her pajamas-that-are-really-underwear. (I really...”
Sounds like a useful, fulfilling life to me. I wouldn't want it, myself. But somebody should.
It’s a good life for a Popularity Sim, I think. Cherry’s Romance/Popularity, but she’s always been more interested in the popularity-type things than the romance-type things. Well, except for woohoo, but she’s perfectly happy to keep that within the triad.
shaonharryandpannisim replied to your photo “Mars the wee puppy grew into Mars the great big hairy...”
You always get the best Pets !! Look at the cute ball of floof
He is very floofy! And I dunno, I tend to get fugly dogs, at least those that are game-generated and not the “premade” ones in the adoption bin. Cute cats, fugly dogs. Poor dogs. This one’s not so fugly, at least.
didilysims replied to your post “*sigh*”
Doesn't help that tumblr takes a lot of internet juice to run! My poor shoddy internet doesn't like it much, and some days refuses to load everything, though other sites will run fine. I feel your pain.
Yeah, all those pics and GIFs and stuff to load can really gum up the works. I’m used to it being slow in Colorado, where the only option available is really, really crappy DSL. It’s cheap and it’s the only option for the moment, so it’s not really worth complaining about. But here in CA, where we’ve been for over a year now, we have that fiberoptic jazz, and it’s usually really, really fast and it’s expensive. So, when you pay a lot for fast internet, you expect it to be...Well, fast. All the time. :) But apparently they were doing something the past couple days and I guess they’re done because it’s back to normal now. :)
pensblr replied to your photoset “For the anon who requested them, here’s the mangled version of Spaik’s...”
Still loving your hi-res textures on...all the things. Thank you!
You’re welcome! I still worry that it’ll be pushing it too much...but then I remember that most of the converted stuff from other games is high-res/high-poly, and since I don’t have very much of that stuff AND I don’t have an unreasonable amount of hi-res custom hair, either, I’m figuring I, at least, can go sort of hog-wild with objects and walls/floors. Not so sure about everyone else, though...
esotheria-sims replied to your photoset “For the anon who requested them, here’s the mangled version of Spaik’s...”
*snags* Your hi-res recolors will be the death of me...
I promise to say nice things at your funeral. ;)
celebkiriedhel replied to your post “*sigh*”
More importantly - check your ping - it might be that one of the networks may be struggling. Its worth talking to your internet provider to see.
Yeah, the hubbo called them. It’s his job to do phone things, since I hate talking on phones. Apparently, they were doing something or something was down (I kind of tuned out all the technobabble that I don’t understand), but it’s fixed now. YAY! I’m just glad it wasn’t a problem on our end.
getmygameon replied to your photo “Pop! (I love her OMGWTF?! face.)”
More like a 'no! I just bought this! Damnit I knew I shouldn't have had that extra cinnamon roll last night!' Face XD
Heh. Yeah, pregnancy bumps AND getting fat both kinda happen very suddenly to Sims. Like, 0 to 60 in 0.1 seconds. :) I imagine it might be hard to know which is which, at first. “Am I pregnant? Or am I just fat?” Then again, all the barfing should be a clue to them, I’d think...
leavealight-on replied to your photo “Aaron barged in to hog the piano.”
Apologies if you've already been asked this, but where are those curtains from? They're gorgeous :)
They are a recolor I have of the Holy Simoly “Simply Elegant” curtains. I’m sorry to say that I have no idea who made that particular recolor or where it might be found since I have hundreds of recolors of those things, gathered over years. I’m sorry! But I agree they’re nice. But then, orange IS one of my favorite colors. :)
sim-boo replied to your post “And of course the next morning, Amelia rolled up the usual...”
I like how its not like "I WANT THIS PERSON TO DIE" cause that would be too direct instead they just imply it
I imagine the people who do the game ratings might be a little iffy on Sims outright wishing death on people. :) But it is still pretty much the same thing. Even more vicious is wanting them to be eaten by a cowplant so that the pissed-off Sim can drink their life essence. Yow!
didilysims replied to your photoset “New lots! Captioned.”
They look so cool with their Lot Adjuster adjustedness. (And even without--pretty snazzy buildings.)
Thanks! I’m in love with the Lot Adjuster a little bit. So many cool things you can do with it! I wish Mootilda was still with us, so that I could thank her more for all of her utilities for the game. :(
cedanyblee replied to your photoset “Here are @nimitwinklesims‘s horizonless skies, edited to be compatible...”
That's the sims 2?! Whaaaa- so pretty. ��
It is indeed TS2! Completely unedited pics, too. With all of the stuff that’s been made for the game in the past couple of years, particularly the stuff that affects neighborbood view, I think it’s the prettiest game of the four. But, I could be a wee bit biased. ;)
holleyberry replied to your post “*is contemplating building a custom uni* *is probably insane* *has...”
Yes! There are so many things you can do in this game.
I know! There are so many things that I STILL haven’t done, even though I’ve been playing for almost 10 years. And I see people saying, “Oh, I’m so bored with the game!” and I’m like...how? How can you be? You can do literally ANYTHING with it! Boredom is not possible! I mean, I can see being bored with a particular family or even a particular neighborhood. But with the game as a whole? Not possible.
penig replied to your photo “These two barged in and…um… Well, he’s always admired her at her pool...”
And she needs to get on with her life. No one can mourn forever.
This is true. But seriously, does she need to get on with her life with her brother-in-law??? Because, judging by her wants, she really, really wants to. But A) I’m not sure I wanna go there. I mean, I’m perfectly OK with doing in the game some things that freak other people out, but...I dunno, for me that’s pushing it. And B) Simon doesn’t seem to feel the same. Yeah, he’ll mess with her if they’re together, but he doesn’t roll wants for her. Probably because for him, she’s just one of many.
clericalrodent replied to your photo “Owen is just slightly kitty-obsessed. As in, he pretty much does...”
Ooh, you should totally get some custom kitties to spice up the genetics game.
I might, if I do more breeding. As it is, I’m happy with just what the game generates. Same as I am with Sims, for that matter. Once in a blue moon I’ll download a Sim, but generally I’m happy with what my game generates.
#getmygameon#penig#shaonharryandpannisim#didilysims#pensblr#esotheria-sims#celebkiriedhel#leavealight-on#sim-boo#cedanyblee#holleyberry#clericalrodent#replies
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The 12 worst types of Instagram Stories
We need to talk about Instagram Stories.
"Story of my life"? More like please don’t story your whole life, or at least do so tastefully.
Over the past few years, Instagram Stories have cannibalized Snapchat and emerged supreme as the premiere location to show off shaky cam concert footage and puppy-dog selfies. But with great power comes great misuse of a platform.
We’ve all succumb to the desire to constantly cherry pick the juiciest parts of our life and share them with anyone who cares to tune in. Sometimes, though, those juicy bits don’t taste, sound, or look very good to those of us consuming them.
It’s time for a crash course in Instaquette (Instagram etiquette, duh).
12. The 'New Post' Story
Don’t post your post to your story to your post to your story to your post…
If you post something, we’ll see it in due time.
Just like Bebe Rexha said in her hit song with that country singer: "If it’s meant to be, it’ll be." If we’re meant to see your post, we will. You mustn’t shove it down our throats by posting it on your story with a GIF or scribbles over it, concealing the very thing we just might have been interested in seeing. That’s called overkill, friends.
I wouldn’t have minded scrolling by and throwing you a like, organically. But now that I know you want me to see something, I will actively avoid looking at it, Birdbox style.
11. The Work Out Photos Story
We get it, you like to get your iPhone sweaty.
It’s 2019. We’re all for body positivity and going after your goals in a healthy way. Strive! A nice, strong gym post is cool. But to constantly barrage us with poorly lit semi-self conscious pics of you flexing is poor form. Leave it to Kim Kardashian. Do your squats and your pull ups and then barrage us with pics in those jeans that are beginning to fit like a second skin. Double negative if you’re forcing your significant other to participate in your sweaty social gains. They just want to meet their PR without feeling pressured to appear swol to your 539 followers.
10. The Filmed Without Consent Story
Let your friends do their thing without turning it into a production.
If your friend wants to be filmed, we guarantee they will do something to warrant a recording sesh. It’s just not cool to constantly be filming your friends’ every move. Soon, they’ll start to feel like they can’t do anything around you without feeling like Britney circa 2006.
There’s nothing more cringe-worthy than watching someone publicly squirm under the lens of their friend's iPhone.
9. The Pointless Poll Story
They see me pollin’, they hatin’.
If you’re going to put a poll in your story, and yes there is a right and wrong time for a poll. Please adhere to poll etiquette.
For the love of all that is good, place your poll in the center of the screen so we don’t accidentally vote if we’re trying to move on to the next slide. OR conversely when we are aggressively trying to vote on your poll and you’ve placed it so far to the left that we end up clicking backwards. We don’t need to see your story twice.
Finally, the polls that read "yes" or "yes, but in red" need to die. It was never funny.
8. The Terrible Music Story
If you play a song through your speakers, you’re dead to us.
Instagram went out of their way for you, and you have shown no gratitude. We’re looking at you Kylie Jenner. That’s right, we’re talking about playing songs through your phone’s speakers instead of the music feature on the app. We would have listened to AM radio if we wanted our music reception to go in and out, so we sure as hell don’t want it coming from your iPhone.
7. The Facetune'd Child Story
We don’t want to see your baby smoother than a glazed doughnut, Rebecca.
If we’ve said it once, we’ve said it a thousand times. DON’T FACETUNE YOUR CHILDREN. Babies are naturally cute. There is no need to morph or transform their bodies, thus holding them to ridiculous beauty/cuteness standards, before they even know what ridiculous beauty standards are. We really thought this one should be an obvious don’t, but as per usual the internet has found a way to disappoint us.
6. The Never-ending Rant Story
Go 👏 off 👏 but 👏 respect 👏 the 👏 medium
Listen, sometimes you just gotta go TF off — whether that be about a topic of social injustice, or when you feel personally attacked by the vicious moms who fought you for dominance at the Bath and Body Works Candle Day Sale™.
Unfortunately, the time limit of Story clips don’t necessarily lend themselves to a 30 minute impassioned critique of the cisheteropatriarchy. And we guarantee that people would love to hear it — if only you weren’t getting cut off every 15 seconds. Next time a particular issue lights a fire within you, spark it up on YouTube instead.
5. The BFF Birthday Story
It’s my party, and I’ll post 9,000,000 clips if I want to.
I think my least favorite type of Instagram post is the 'It's my best friend's birthday' post
— Brian Koerber (@bkurbs) January 8, 2019
🎵 Happy Birthday dear [yourfriendthatidon’tknow], Happy Birthday to you! 🎵 It’s literally Birthday Law that you must spend the day hyping up your bestie on their birthday — but do we really care? Yes, we’re sure your friend’s #bdayLook is bomb. Yes, that party looks like it’s jumping. Yes, that cake looks delish. But are we there? No. BFF birthday stories are the epitome of JOMO (Joy Of Missing Out) — watching people you don’t know have fun is boring, not glamorous.
4. The Boomerang Clipshow Story
Nothing but Boomerangs for days.
When the Boomerang first came to Instagram, having your own personal GIF machine was a fun, inventive way to liven up your feed. Now that the novelty has worn off, though, we’re begging you to stop. There’s so many more features available to you on Stories now: face filters, zooming in with music, uhh….other things! We don’t need a whiplash-inducing video of you chugging your third cocktail of the night.
3. The Tons of Unreadable Text Story
OH GOD MY EYES
You don’t need a degree in Color Theory to slap some aesthetically pleasing text onto your Story, but at the very least please try and make it readable. There’s nothing worse than attempting to speed-read 0.2 size cursive neon green font on a bright yellow border in less than 15 seconds before the Story switches. Crowding the screen with text also takes away from the actual photo itself, if you took one. This is not a comic book, so don’t fill your stories up with speech bubbles.
2. The Filming Your Drive Story
Yes, a video of the street you’re driving down is EXACTLY the content I was looking for.
Everyone knows you shouldn’t text and drive, or at least that’s what we thought. That includes Instagram, guys. Not only is it dangerous and could cause bodily harm to you or others, but we can guarantee that absolutely no one cares about you filming yourself talking or blasting the bass through your crappy car speakers.
No one asked for this content, in fact, we’re asking that it stop.
1. The Concert Story
If we wanted to see that concert, we would’ve bought a ticket.
We’re so glad you went to that concert. We really are. Live your joy. But watching said concert playback on a 5-inch glass screen with sound quality that makes it seem like it was recorded on a Nintendo DS was never part of our plan.
Unless you’re literally backstage with the artist, please refrain from recording back-to-back snippets of their concert. Your seats aren’t even that good so we can’t differentiate the artist from their backup dancers. This also applies to Storying in a loud club. Unless Jaden Smith is holding a sparkler while simultaneously pouring you a shot of Grey Goose, refrain. We will not have the FOMO you’re so desperately trying to induce if our ears are bleeding. If you must post, kill the sound.
You can be better at Instagram Stories. We believe in you.
Image: GIPHY
The truth is that every Instagram story can easily be swiped away at a moment’s notice. You can speedrun through clips faster than your finger can graze glass (literally). None of these annoying stories will kill us, although we may claim they will — after all, we live for the drama.
But, like most people, we are genuinely interested in our friends’ lives. Just maybe not enough to put up with their Insta habits. As I’m sure legions of people throughout history would agree, some stories just aren’t meant to be told.
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