#Not to mention I did my best to make it as compact as I can

[idril-la-wiccan]

I'm 100% sure the Ship has already broken its protocol several times for Louie's sake (yes, I am including the Golden PikPik Carrots incident in this). Why ? I don't know. I guess it's just like that.

Also have my idea on what the Ship looks like inside -provided it does have a living space.

[devilfic]

Idk if you have seen daredevil but in the case you have can I request a head cannon of you making a playlist for him and him talking about songs that remind you of him?

Like I was listening to The Marias and I felt that their songs give this feeling of how it would be to date him.

❝making a playlist for matt murdock❞

pairing: matt murdock x gn!reader. cw: established relationship, brief mention of sex. words: 1k.

a/n: I actually have seen daredevil and I love him a lot, this will be fun. shoutout to this post that confirmed the "matt murdock loves jazz" vibe he gives off

I wanna start off by saying that as soon as I saw "daredevil" and "songs" in the same sentence, I got a VIVID image of matt in a jazz bar

I can't recall off the top of my head if matt mentions any specific artists or genres he listens to in the show, but I personally think matt likes jazz, funk, maybe some soul/neo-soul, or anything you'd hear in a nice understated bar downtown

the thing is I think that matt really likes instrumental-heavy music because he appreciates being able to pick apart the melodies

I also imagine he's a stickler for his favorite genres and won't really relent unless you introduce something new to him by force

so, a playlist

you push an mp3 player into his hand as you walk past him and he thumbs over the buttons, twists a finger through the cords of the earbuds, and smiles, "what's this?"

he hears you land on the couch and makes his way over to sit beside you as you take one of the earbuds to put in your ear, stretching your legs over his lap, "I made a playlist for you!"

"yeah?"

"yeah. I know you like your vinyls but this is smaller, more compact. easy to put in your pocket and hopefully not break when you're running around the city at night. I'm serious. don't break that."

"I'm honored," matt tilts his head in your direction, inhaling the scent of your shampoo, listening for the parting of your lips as they break into a smile, "nothing too shocking, I hope?"

"I tried to stick to things I thought you'd like, and I did include some of the songs you've recommended to me over the years since you can't lug your vinyls everywhere. it won't sound as nice but... it's something. it's pretty romantic, right?"

it is romantic

matt imagines you hunched over his computer, tediously searching up mp3s of his favorite songs and putting together a playlist for him, trying your best to ease him into unfamiliar territory

he can also hear the nervous thumping of your heart as you wait for his reply, so he splays a hand over your ankle and squeezes, "yeah, you're pretty damn romantic. any particular order I should play it in?

"just hit play, handsome."

when the first song starts playing, he's transported back to hearing it for the first time in the bar where he met you, sharing drinks at a table as you humored him on your theories of who the devil of hell's kitchen really was

you were a few drinks past tipsy and had come to chat him up at the behest of your friends who—and you learned this several days later—he'd heard call him sexy at least four times

but it was you whose voice had caught his attention, who had sworn that a "man like him" had to be waiting for a date, that there was no way he'd be here all alone

and had promptly eaten your words when he chimed in to let you know that he did not, in fact, have a date

he was fuzzy on the details as to how you'd gotten on the topic of his alter ego, but it tickled him nonetheless how you presented your theories more confidently than you flirted

he countered each one but in good faith, playing devil's advocate if only so that he could hear how your mind whirred with ideas

after a few pretty well-articulated counterarguments, you'd snorted and asked, "what are you, a lawyer?"

and when you learned that he was a lawyer? the matt murdock of nelson, murdock, & page? oh, he was sure you lit up like a christmas tree

even after walking you to your place, matt was humming the tune of the song he'd discovered you to, a feeling in his bones that more than just it would be sticking around

matt takes you to a jazz bar for your first date, feeding you details about the musicians over drinks as you ask him about his favorites

he likes a lot of the classics: things his dad enjoyed, stuff he's heard at the jazz bars he's roped foggy into visiting with him during law school

he tells you he likes some of the new stuff but nothing beats the classics, all of which he has vinyls of at home

and you ask him about the newer artists he likes and he tells you he'll put some on for you at his place if the night is still young

that night, he brings you back to his and plays this while you make love

most of the songs matt thinks of when he thinks of you are wordless, often more abstract representations of how you make him feel

the few songs with words are quite literal. whatever the lyrics say is how he feels about you

you've learned—if you're not already a fan of the same genres—to appreciate his taste

and you've also learned to love the way he lights up as you describe what the music sounds like to him, the way he slips in a word here and there when you come up short and it always just fits

it's kind of like his love language

you've got some of these songs on the playlist too

you see him get a little stiff when a song comes on that he doesn't know, and so you watch all the minute expressions in his face as it plays, wondering anxiously if he likes it or not

you know he does when he replays it

he'll tap out the rhythm on your ankle like he's picking apart every detail of the song piece by piece, placing them layer over layer in his mind until it becomes whole and he turns to tell you he really likes it

while he usually likes to keep his ears open for anything in the city while he's out and about, he'll pop in an earbud and start your playlist and think about you

now, if only you'd add a recording of you singing to yourself every morning, it'd be complete. that's gotta be his favorite

taglists: @yikes-buddy @alexxavicry @theclassicvinyldragon @marina-and-the-memes

[satureja13]

Jeb's Investigations - Part 2

Jeb lost track of the pawprints when they reached the compacted path. So he and Valerian went on to Goldshire since he has no idea where else to go in this still unfamiliar world. As soon as they arrived, Lou (NPC Jeb's best friend) already came running. Lou: "Oh Jeb! You're here!"

Lou: "I'm out of my head! He's still gone!" And then Lou threw himself into Jeb's arms, sobbing. He doesn't feel as if he'd eaten whole Jack, though. But Jeb knows that Jack can eat two whole pizze plus a cake and still doesn't look stuffed. Werewolves...

Lou: "I don't know what to do. I'm so worried. He vanished last night and I can't find him anywhere!" Last night? That's quite a long time when we consider that Jack found his dead body just a few ingame hours ago...

Lou: "Help me find him, Jeb! Who knows what happened to him? Maybe he cowers somewhere, alone and afraid?" Or dead... But Lou looks genuinely worried. Could he really have killed (and eaten) Jack and still convincingly play the worried friend?

Lou: "Let's go inside and have a tea. I need to calm down. I'm so upset, I won't be of any help otherwise."

They went over to Lou's house. And that's when Jeb noticed the pawprints! Jeb: "Uhm Lou. Have you been out?" Lou: "Sure. I ran around for hours to search for Jack."

Lou: "I'm sorry. I'd been so busy looking for Jack, I hadn't time to clean up." No way the kitchen got so dirty since Jack left. Maybe Lou carried Jack to his kitchen and - uhm 'processed' him here? That would explain the state the kitchen was in ö.Ö'

Jeb shivered - but he helped cleaning and reassured himself. Just - a - game. Just - a - game. Just look for hints, Jeb. But there was no blood on the counters and no ominous meat parts in the fridge. Just vegetables. Lou had mentioned to Jack that they are almost all vegans here. Hm. Lou looked sadly at the open cookbook on the stand: "Oh, I wish he were back. We wanted to make pizza today. He loves his pizza."

They finally were able to brew a pot of tea and Jeb asked Lou what had happened to make Jack run away. Lou couldn't look Jeb in the eyes: "Eh, something must have startled him... I guess? You know we don't live openly as werewolves here so I ran after him in my human form. But I soon lost sight of him and when I was able to transform unseen and tried to track him, he probably went trough the river so I lost his trace. *Lou pushed the plate away from him* Ach, I'm not hungry. I can't eat the churros. They remind me of him. He loves his churros." Jeb doesn't know what to think. Is Lou suspicious because he's not hungry? Because he's still fed from eating Jack? But not guilty because Lou still speaks of Jack like he's still alive 'He loves pizza/churros' not 'he loved...' But he's definitely hiding something. He must have witnessed what had startled Jack - otherwise he wouldn't have been able to see him running away. Jeb tried to find out more but Lou didn't tell him anything about what else happened last night.

Jeb: "I'll do what I can. Do you have any idea where he could have run to? Does he know any other people here? Or did he have a quarrell with anyone? So he might be hiding from them?" Or did someone wanted to kill him? (But he didn't say that out loud. If Lou is really innocent, he does't want to upset him. Yet. And it's better Jack's death remains a secret as long as the investigations go.)

Lou: "Everyone here liked Jack. But he wasn't this close with anyone yet. I already asked the folks here. And he surely had no quarrel. He's much too kind and friendly. And funny. Smart and talented and cute... Oh Jeb. What do I do?" 'Cute'?

Then they heard Valerian neighing loudly. Lou: "Oh - your master is calling you!? Have you been on an errand for him? You should go. You don't want him to be upset ö.ö Let's go." Eh - his master? Errand? Lou: "I'll accompany you to the stable. I'll have to replace one of Lunatic's horseshoes anyway. He lost one." Jeb played along and they went over to the stable where Valerian already waited impatiently.

Lou: "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have kept you here for so long. You should have told me you are busy for the master." Jeb, still having no idea what Lou is talking about, but still playing along: "Eh, but Jack is important too. We need to find him and I will find out what happened to him, hm?" Lou: "Thank you Jeb, you're a true friend." And when Jeb was just about to mount Valerian, Lou said: "What, no goodbye kiss before you leave?" A goodbye kiss??? Uh, Jack told them how straightforward Lou is and that NPC Jeb and him are best friends here ingame, but a kiss? Uh, well - if it's necessary to stay in character... o.o'

Lou scratched Valerian's neck: "Did you and Lunatic have a quarrel? You always kiss goodbye when you leave." Oh! Lou was talking to Valerian! And not to him ^^' Phew! (Jeb only ever kissed Saiwa :3 )

Lou to Lunatic: "He will find Jack. Don't worry. Let's replace that horseshoe of yours, hm?" But Lunatic didn't pay attention. He just looked sadly and worried after Valerian...

The Therapy Game Master Post with the sessions and places so far is -> here

From the Beginning 🔱  Underwater Love 🔱 Latest

Current Chapter: 'Who killed Jack?' from the beginning ▶️ here

📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 17-22 ~ 23-28

[alicerosejensen]

OK. I did it anyway! Finished the translation and tried as best he could. Part 3

I have a lot of debt, but I did it!

Good ending attached. If you like the bad ending of this story then please stop at 2 parts.

There's also a bit of angst here, a mention of smut.

I listened to a bunch of songs while writing this. In fact, there was a gigantic temptation to make Leon's girlfriend run away again, but I decided to fix the broken hearts of readers.

English is not my native language (I will write this as often as possible so that I don't get tomato thrown at me for mistakes). But I tried.

The text is quite large. I do not know if anyone has the strength to master it.

All efforts crumbled like a house of cards. All hopes that your relationship could still be saved were destroyed from the very day when you finally left, taking one suitcase with you.

For Leon, it was still an idiotic comedy that dragged on for a long time. He kept calling, texting, trying to talk to you about this misunderstanding. But you just cut him out of your life right away, without even giving him an attempt to explain everything.

But the comedy turned into a nightmare. Because Leon realized that you really left. A rather dirty game: to become the one who gave him peace and true love, and then in one second set fire to a small flowering island in his soul, leaving ashes behind.

Leon let you get too close to him. So close that he began to consider you his own. At some point, it even seemed to him that no one could love the way he loved you. But now you have turned the blue sky into black, discarding it as an unnecessary thing. Sometimes, stretching out his hand, lying on the bed, Leon woke up, thinking that since you are not around, then you are in the kitchen. You probably eat breakfast while looking at your phone.

But then he remembered.

You've gone. With tears, creating from his image a monster that hurt you throughout the relationship. You have done worse than Ada. It was a hundred times more painful. Leon knows it's crazy, but for just one night with you, he would give his life.

The only woman who has always been on his side. He wanted to feel the soft cotton of your gray T-shirt, but only your hands could be more gentle.

You have always been so pure that the world could be silenced by such innocence and angelic beauty. All the stars could go out if only something happened to you. You are a rare angel, in whose arms nothing hurts, who descended to him, to the last sinner, constantly fighting in an endless hell. Maybe someone decided that he received too much grace?

Leon would agree with that. But he's not ready to accept it. You said that you love him, despite the fact that he supposedly has feelings for Ada, and if he can convince you otherwise, then perhaps his beloved will return to him

But you didn't want to be in that cage. The whole situation with Leon, in your opinion, resembled the plot of Dolly Parton's song "Jolene", where Jolene is Ada Wong, whom you could beg not to take your lover. After all, as Jolene, Ada was the embodiment of an unearthly ideal. With a voice as soft as summer rain and with a smile like the breath of spring… Ha, you grinned remembering the words of the song.

What could you, a simple student, compare to this Ada-Jolene? Leon kept her compact in his bedside table and you still feel the reproach of envy that you will never become such a woman. You still cry when you think how many times he imagined an elusive mercenary in your place. But your happiness does not depend on Ada. You were able to find the strength to open the birdcage and run out to freedom, breathing in fresh air.

Leon used you. Crushed your heart into a piece of paper and threw it into the fire like the last scoundrel. But here you took out a burnt ember, intending to take care of it and already now you see that the first sprouts of trust in other men break into the light. However, love is not knocking at your door yet.

Because there is one huge problem: no matter how much pain Leon caused you, you want to leave him in your memories. Salty rivers of tears flow down your eyes almost every night, forcing you to curl up in the fetal position with your hands pressed to your chest when you read his messages. These are such ruthless blows that literally destroyed your soul. He's already traumatized you enough, so why doesn't he stop it already?!

The whole body and soul are screaming: help me! And the mind doesn't want to forget his fucking name and touch. You can't go back to Leon Scott Kennedy because he will bring nothing but evil. Say to yourself and remember forever: goodbye, my love for this man, because my heart can no longer bear this sick love.

You met in the spring and broke up in the spring. How much joy and sadness this time of year has brought you!

How much pain there is in the world, and all because of fucking love.

But for Leon it was completely different.

It was the middle of the day, when the sun was still high in the sky, promising to illuminate the streets with its light for at least another three or four hours. Late autumn time, Leon didn't want to get out of his mostly, alcohol-smelling apartment, but he had to write a report and hand it over to Hannigan, despite the overdue deadlines. To gather his thoughts a little for an answer, Leon went into a nice cafe, hiding from the strong wind, hoping that in addition to all kinds of desserts, he could order coffee to take away.

Ordinary strong coffee without sugar and hopes that it will not taste like bile.

The arrival of a new visitor was announced by a ringing bell, to the ringing of which the waiter immediately raised his head from his business. Leon was not going to linger, he walked past the tables with a few visitors until the familiar smell of women's perfume hit his nose.

And stopped.

He forgot about everything: Hannigan, the report, his job. About everything that brought him pain from your departure, because right now you were sitting with your back to him in a warm beige dress, holding a glass with some kind of drink with one hand and writing something in your notebook with the other pen, completely ignoring anyone.

All Leon wanted at this very second was to grab you in his arms and never let you go again.

How did this even happen? Why did you, loving him dearly, renounce him in an instant?

And yet your mere presence lifts him from the thorn-strewn earth. Only a meter separated you from each other, but Leon is already burning to the ground. It didn't matter if you were an angel or a demon, you were his love. His restless bird that flew away from him because it could. Because you believed he could still love another woman.

You look like two fools, each of whom believes in his own truth.

You were so serene, calm and nondescript to others. Strawberry ice cream almost melted from lack of your attention or you just didn't find it tasty enough to finish. Leon completely forgot why he came to this cafe. Illuminated by the evening sunlight, you looked like a work of art that you were so fond of.

A slight smile, careless strokes of a strange drawing in a notebook…you looked tired and a little thinner, but for him you remained the most beautiful. Aesthetic - Leon remembers that you like this word.

Did he have the right to disturb you? Like a mirage, Leon didn't want to scare away the one he loved because he knew if he touched you now, you would disappear again. Messages, calls - there were many of them and not one received a response.

If his love really brought you so much suffering, do you need it? Is he really that selfish? But now you tensed up, feeling someone else's gaze on your back, and as if small droplets of crystals began to beat anxiously against each other like wind music warning about who you are desperately trying to get out of your head.

But there was no soulful cry of "run."

You knew he was there. Behind. The heart did not stop with horror - it trembled with excitement. God, don't turn around! So much was lost because of Leon: dreams, hopes, trust, heart…

The palette of the endless emptiness of weekdays turned into slightly brighter colors.

Leon touched your shoulder and you shuddered lifting your head up. It was impossible to ignore this meeting and there was nowhere else to run. His touch was so welcome. The body responded to him by itself, trying to cling closer to feel the forgotten warmth. It was so good.

Suddenly you felt like a drug addict who received a long-awaited dose of the drug.

The purest buzz.

You still didn't say anything, just stared into those diamond eyes, completely losing yourself. By looking at it, you can experience all kinds of death. You wanted to finally surrender to him, submit and accept the inevitable, and then fall asleep in a tight embrace - all for the sake of the illusory hope of not being number 2.

What idiot said that time heals? There wasn't a night or a day when you didn't think about him.

You want to tell everyone to go to hell, and yourself first, because you're the last fool. A proud fool who can't live without him. Damn pride. Leon took a step forward, swallowing loudly, grabbing your shoulder with his other hand, but it didn't hurt. He looked at you as if he was afraid that you would melt into thin air.

You love each other very much, and each of you thinks that one of you does not love the other.

In an instant, everything collapsed in November. Leon knelt down, still squeezing your shoulders. Curse this month. He pressed you to him and you buried your face in his shoulder, inhaling the smell of a leather jacket and barely perceptible cologne. The stubble scratched the skin unpleasantly, but now these sensations were so pleasant.

If Leon doesn't disappear right now, it's going to be the worst month on the calendar. An unhappy month that will leave another stab wound. Your first true love and not a stupid infatuation…Whatever Carey says, it's impossible to forget Leon. There is no longer the strength to drown in it, grasping at a thin thread of feeling.

"Let's talk" - you're definitely a drug addict. His voice was like heroin causing euphoria. Rough and stringy at the same time. The infernal rejection started from him again.

The waiter's voice sounded like a soft soprano, and Leon reluctantly pulled away from you, but did not let go, as if he was afraid that you would jump up from your seat and run away, grabbing your coat. The lungs let out a heavy sigh, but you didn't want to talk to him. It was as if you were afraid that he would have words that would make you return to this anarchy of abnormal relationships. When he loves one woman and sleeps with a completely different one.

"I don't want to, go away," - you whispered, pushing him away with your palm. It was a terrible gesture. But you endured for a long time, accepting his lies, running after him like an obedient dog.

Love is not when it hurts you. And he mocks you and jokes, building those puppy dog eyes. He pretends that this separation is also hard for him. As if he wasn't a soulless being who took advantage of the trust of a girl in love with him.

But the idiotic heart keeps shouting to him, "Love me for a long, long time!" and Leon seems to hear him.

Leon grins, feeling butterflies flutter in his stomach. How many bridges can you burn?

But he strokes your head, runs his fingers through your hair.

"We'll just talk. Please stop ignoring me!"

"Stop foaming at the mouth to prove to me that the mysterious spy in red does not live in your head."

Keep your finger on the pulse and run. After paying for lunch, you grabbed your coat and walked briskly to the exit. And only when Leon caught up with you on the street, trying to stop you by grabbing your wrist, you turned into a scorpion who tried to escape using all his poison.

It's the same thing again.

"You're the worst thing that's ever happened in my life!"- that's what you finally shouted out to him along with all the other shit, but it was this phrase that killed him completely. The gaze seemed to read information from your face, as if checking it for truthfulness. The fucking detector gave out the truth.

"Someone like you never knew what love was. You know what's funny? To Ada Wong, you're just a puppet. A toy that she can play with whenever she wants, and then put it on the shelf and forget." - You poured out your burning poison, turning words into caustic acid to kill him once and for all, despite your tear-stained face. - "That's enough! I will never forgive you! Run after your elusive spy and leave me alone. I deserve to be happy. I'm already broken inside by your fucking love!"

It wasn't fair. You just tore him apart with those words. He's never even half loved you, he's never compared you to anyone! But nothing will bring you back to him. You will no longer illuminate his pitch darkness with your light. Leon really felt like a bastard who trampled on someone who loved him.

He stood there, looking after you, listening to your hysterical sobs, while you ran away again to lick the wounds inflicted. It seemed like you were about to fall to the ground and die from all this pain. All those months that you have not seen him, in no way helped you to stop loving this man. Because things have only gotten worse.

You wanted to lie down and die. Everything you were rebuilding exploded again, turning you into ruins. Ada Wong would never have allowed herself to do that. But the pain you felt became physical. Your head is spinning, the world has become so crazy and alien, sickeningly disgusting, because all the protective mechanisms of orgasm just fail you after all the continuous work. You just screamed from all the injustice that happened to you, and the name of this injustice was Leon S.Kennedy. The fucking bastard who caused you to fall into the mud, acting like an escaped lunatic.

"I hate you," - Leon heard it. The most terrible thing is that he realized that he was destroying you. Your body was experiencing physical pain - spasms, and you already needed professional help. And yet he cradled you like a baby in his arms until you fainted.

One thing you didn't have time to say: despite the fact that you were burning alive, your stupid little heart continues to seek salvation in Leon. It hurts her, but she calls him for help, begging for caring kisses and warm hugs.

What does it feel like to be a girl with a sensitive heart and a brave soul? The moment you discovered that he still loves Ada made you split into many pieces. Lying in a hospital bed, taking medications whose names you don't remember, you heard your mother's muffled crying and fell asleep under it, pulling the blanket over your shoulders, as if under a white noise. Your father stroked your head as if you were a child, slightly dulling the pain that was pounding in your chest.

"You will be sad and forget" - that's what your mother told you when she found out that the cause of the disease was a man. "You won't even remember that you once loved him there."

But you didn't want to forget him. You're so tired of falling asleep thinking about him… because even when you close your eyes like a phantom, you continue to see him. How can you live with this poison in your soul? Leon poisoned you and didn't even send you flowers, considering that he got you into the hospital because of him. And yet part of you was waiting for him to come.

Leon didn't come.

Nervous breakdown on the background of constant stress. Friends also came to find out about your well-being, but only Carey stayed for a long time, trying to pull you out of oblivion, which the brain could not cope with.

She didn't say a word about Leon, fearing that any mention of him would provoke a violent reaction again. Everyone kept saying that everything would be fine and you'd be coming home soon. Did you really feel a little better, but did you feel depressed just thinking about what would happen next? Your beloved friend disappeared as you wanted.

It is in vain to grieve about a failed relationship that was still beautiful, despite the subsequent horror.

"It was wonderful. Goodbye, Leon," you said to yourself when you found a little strength to admit that he is not a monster at all. Time is fleeting, and nothing lasts forever, and you are also unlucky to find happiness in this man.

Drive all thoughts of him away and remember that you are no longer the two of you. Find the strength to learn to live without him and suppressed the passionate feeling of rushing to him under the door banging on it with his fists.

Burn this brand on yourself.

In fact, even in the void can be cozy. When the day of discharge came, your father insisted that you come home again and recover a little from the experience. But you knew that if you came home, you would never erase Leon from your memory. If there was a record with his name on it, you would have listened to it until I broke it.

It's like you've been living in a dark paradise now. There are no medications for memory, but the ones that you started taking clearly muffle all feelings, allowing you to focus on studying. It was quiet and cold in this dark paradise because Leon wasn't there, but you still remembered how your pain-filled body fell to the floor. And yet there was one significant plus that allowed you to live - it was peaceful in this paradise.

And yet, as if you were a lost thing on the shelf, it did not leave you.

November is a really disgusting month. The whole world seemed to be turned upside down. There was the usual calmness with the absence of something important.

But then stability came.

You and Leon don't talk anymore. Apparently, what was said greatly influenced him, but the flowers in your soul still do not bloom. His love for you is still breathing and part of him knows that you love him, but he will prefer to give you a chance to forget him and all the memories associated with him, given how he hurt your soul.

He would like to stay in your life, but not after what he did.

Therefore, he was content with what was left to him. Polaroids from your vacation with him and memories…and some things that you forgot at his place. Meaningless little things, but he kept them. Everyone focused on their lives. You were riding with friends on a bike, exposing your face to the wind, hugging a friend. Leon is back from his work. And everyone missed the other.

But there is no desire to fall into this abyss anymore. Then it was time for healing, it seemed that the impossible was happening, but fate desperately liked to bring your roads together.

Your face is a real masterpiece against the background of daubs. Among the hundreds, Leon noticed you with your bestia when you were choosing some kind of gift, he looked at you from afar.

The cradle of his suffering… Leon feels like he is filled with love for you again, watching you laugh merrily after recovering from all the wounds that he inflicted on you. So cheerful… he had no right to be with you. With the people he values, something happens all the time, but this time he himself is the one who repeatedly stabbed in the back.

You never blamed Ada for your failure, only him, and it was deserved, because until the moment of your loss, Leon still found these meetings… more personal and intimate even if sex between them has not been for a long time. Just something else attracted him, but he would never let ordinary attraction destroy what he really loves.

However, that's exactly what he did. A stupid compact left somewhere in the corner of the bedside table, which he still had from China… you made the wrong conclusions by backing them up with that inappropriate message on his phone and it was still enough to leave him forever. But now you were laughing and it warmed Leon, how he wants to hear this sound again at home, along with numerous words of tenderness.

It was not worth looking at you for so long because some force pulling each other forced you to find this gaze from which you can die and rise again. Everything beautiful has remained very far away. None of you will say a simple "hello" to the other, and yet why are you silent like fools?

Thanks to the pills, all the senses were dulled a little, allowing a stupid thought to slip into your head - to talk to him.

The doctor prescribed you treatment: medications, rest and moderate physical activity, and somewhere between the lines he wrote in invisible ink "no Leon Kennedy." And you're drowning in this swamp again, violating all the doctor's orders. It doesn't hurt yet, but it's already scary to exhale if you stumble, fall into the water and have to start over.

These silent glances with each other… everyone is afraid to take an extra step, because everything can collapse. Leon doesn't want to be the cause of your tears, he's already brought enough shit to a dear person. Everything beautiful has remained very far away. None of you will say a simple "hello" to the other, and yet why are you silent like fools?

Thanks to the pills, all my senses were dulled a little, allowing a stupid thought to slip into my head - to talk to him. You said a lot to him that day, a lot of things he didn't really deserve, trapping him.

But only now are you wondering: did you notice any moments correctly or did you come up with a reason for leaving? After all, sometimes you could catch the scent of someone else's perfume on his clothes and still believe that there is only him and you. Maybe Ada marked it on purpose so that you could figure out who it really belongs to? What if it was her subtle sign for you?

"Stay away from my territory"

But there was another truth. Your bestie got distracted looking at some jewelry in the window when you watched Leon leave. Have you ever wondered who is a masochist God or is it you? It looks like it was you, because no god forced you to follow him. And Leon felt this persecution, which made him turn around when he saw your indecisive face.

You yourself took a step towards him, and the heart itself began to revive after a long hibernation. The truth is, you had no idea what to say.

It was you who wiped away his tears when he was in too much pain.

It was you who banished all his fears when he woke up in the middle of the night.

You were holding his hand. Not Ada.

"I'm sorry…" You nodded for some reason. - "I'm not… princess… this is a chance meeting. I didn't want to bother you, so you wouldn't think about me.

"I know." - Leon barely heard what you said to him, looking away from his eyes. "I'm sorry for what I said to you then.

"What?" - his reaction made your lips smile with a kind smile that he could not forget. Leon seemed really discouraged, but you just turned around to look at Carey to make sure she wouldn't go crazy when she saw who you were talking to. Definitely, it's all because of the pills.

"I said you were the worst thing that happened in my life, but that's not true. In fact, I only told you a lot because I wanted you to be as hurt as I was. However, I shouldn't have done that. You're a good man. I behaved terribly, like a naughty child."

Leon couldn't understand what had just happened to him. His pupils seemed to widen at the impossible words and your ridiculous apologies. After all, if anyone should be apologizing, it's him, because he drove you to a nervous breakdown. He shook his head, just in case checking to see if you were a figment of his imagination, but you were still standing there. Right in front of him. Was what was happening a prank?

Maybe it's karma?

"You don't have to apologize" - all Leon could squeeze out of himself and you just shrugged your shoulder for a long time without answering anything.

"I apologize for saying too much. It's my fault that I ended up in the hospital, not yours. But I'm not apologizing for that…" Ada's name stuck in throat.

"For leaving?" - Leon grinned when you silently agreed with him. - "At least you had the right to. I don't want to hurt you anymore. You've had enough of me already. "

He wanted to touch you. Just to touch your cheek or hand one last time. He didn't want to let you go, but he knew he couldn't keep around if you didn't want to. Leon snorts, trying to shake off this desire. What kind of kisses can we talk about if you don't love him? All hopes for at least some stability in his life burst like a balloon, and Leon himself held the needle in his hands.

"Thank you for your wonderful attitude!" - You shoot him again, saying these words, and Leon recoils from the one he was so eager to see. - "Even if we didn't succeed, I'm still grateful to you. The last few months have been difficult, but it's my own fault. You didn't promise me anything… I've had time to think. With this Ada, everything is much more complicated and longer for you than with me, and I probably didn't want to admit it to myself. I put on pink glasses and didn't want to see anything but pink shades. You didn't need my heart, and you told me about it at the very beginning, but that's how young she is…" - You laughed nervously, feeling that the effect of the pills seems to be starting to evaporate. - Someone has watched too many movies about love. Forgive me for these tantrums if you can."

Carey screamed loudly and you both turned around at her exclamation when she pulled you by the hand trying to take you away from this man. It even amused you a little, but something still pleased your poor soul more - you were able to admit to yourself that your fault was present in this breakup. Not just Leon.

Leon didn't have time to say a word, but it was in vain for him to be sad. You have forgiven him and yourself. It was the most important event that finally brought a bit of long-awaited relief.

There was only one thing you didn't want to understand, either the brain was using a dirty autosuggestion technique, or it was the pills that dorktor prescribed for you. but the point is this:

Kennedy needed your heart. He needed your love, because everything he had, he had already given to you.

He should have apologized, not you. He wanted to come to the hospital to pick you up, but changed his mind at the last moment, fearing that his presence would complicate the situation. And yet Leon followed you to the exit when Carey shouted at him not to dare approach.

It seems that this is the reason for your separation . The one who hammered into you the idiotic idea that you were his "meat for fucking".

But you are no longer running away from him, however, is it really necessary to break into an already destroyed world again, where he destroyed everything. Leon no longer leaves messages, does not call and does not look for a meeting, and you also began to live quietly feeling only constant fatigue and unwillingness to do anything. And it didn't work out with the guys, there were friends, but it didn't go beyond fun gatherings, even if they tried to flirt.

Looks like your heart still belongs to Leon. For him, it's probably a souvenir, and you have a hole in your chest.

Do you remember that bar where we met for the first time? Now, sitting at the same table, you're looking at the place where Leon was with some damn expensive bottle of whiskey. Without thinking about anything. You straightened your legs and just indulged in sweet memories that no longer caused any harm. It's a little sad, but you're still too young to be disappointed in yourself.

Previously, there was some kind of vigorous cocktail of disappointment, hatred, sadness and contempt inside, but now there is absolutely nothing. It's like you finally got a sobering slap in the face, returning to your former state and admitting that suffering is shit.

Was there any point in talking to Leon? He's probably already broken up with his feeble-minded girlfriend and now he's either found another one or is chasing Ada-their favorite cat-and-mouse game. Of course, he really has some part of your cosmetics left in his apartment, a favorite mug, maybe something else… oh! a notebook. What a stupid thing, because there was nothing important in this notebook except funny drawings and a list of products. Well, maybe something else in small things. Leon probably threw everything away a long time ago.

Although you would like to return the mug.

The mug that he gave you with an idiotic inscription.

You unlocked your phone and saw some excited messages from your father. After quickly answering them, you clicked on Leon's number. Just one click separated you. You could have texted or called, but you spat and just put the phone back in your pocket. It would be necessary to delete his number.

And he still has your damn expensive perfume. It is not like the one used by Ada Wong - her fragrance is dominated by fresh citrus notes combined with something cold. A grenade? You liked calmer floral scents. Lilac and gooseberry have a good aroma.

And you would have torn it off with your own hands. Because the bottle cost a lot of money, and was in a limited collection. For some reason, now you remember him and it became so insulting that you lost such an expensive thing (even if Kennedy bought it for you again). But it's still a damn stupid reason to look for a meeting with him!

In general, you should have been kicked out of his head too. Leon kept your things close on purpose but didn't touch them. One part of him hoped that you would remember them and come to pick them up, and the other party was afraid that then he would have nothing left. The last memories will be gone. He loved flipping through your notebook, finding funny the drawings you made while you were sitting at boring lectures.

He doesn't care, he knows that you liked this perfume, and he also knows that you can't afford such a luxury right now. It's a shitty act to look for a meeting with you again when all the dots are already set.

Even though he wants to see you, can he really let you go later?

However… he wants to write to you. Fingers are already typing a message when an alert with your number and a short phrase appears in front of the screen: Can I pick up some things?

Holy shit! YES!

Leon answered immediately. The usual "yes" despite the fact that everything inside was screaming. A couple of minutes later, another message came asking when you could do it and he wanted to answer in a sarcastic manner, what exactly is for you at any convenient time.

But the line came out the usual "when you want, then take it." Maybe it was a little rude.

Nothing else followed. Leon had no idea when to expect you. Apartment was in terrible condition. In addition, there was your wilted cactus on the computer table. Cactus. Wilted. Maybe because his hostess collected all the belongings and left forgetting him?

Leon didn't know how to take care of him at all. Just poured half-drunk water into a small flower pot, and that's it. The flower that grew on it has long disappeared, and the cactus itself has turned yellow. He turned the pot over in his hand, looking at it from all sides, wondering if it could be fixed somehow in a short time, but decided that if it really upset you, he would buy exactly the same one.

At least to make it up to you a little.

After about an hour of thinking, there was a quiet knock on the door. Leon, casting a cursory glance once again at the unfortunate cactus, let you into the apartment pretty quickly, but you stood there for a few more seconds as if you were afraid to enter the lion's den, which would certainly bite off your head if he crossed the threshold of the apartment.

"Hey," - Your hand waved nervously in the air as a greeting when you were here again, afraid of being captured by your own memories.

Leon only apologized for the mess (although he managed to clean up some things while you were just standing outside the door for about 30 minutes, gaining strength to knock) and offered you tea, knowing how much you love him. A great opportunity to find out what happened to your favorite mug, but you refused first of all by casting a glance at the withered plant.

"I watered him from time to time." He hesitated, scratching his head with his hand. - "Maybe he needed fertilizer, but I didn't know anything about it, especially since it's a cactus!.. Okay sweetheart, just let me buy you a new one or something.

Your laughter slightly diluted the gloomy atmosphere, and Leon clearly felt better.

"It's all right." - A small pot appeared in your hands with the intention of taking it and then throwing it away. - "To be honest, this guy has been sick for a long time. Eventually, he still fell to the death of the brave."

You smiled wearily, making some kind of hero out of a cactus, and your ex-boyfriend also picked up the cheerful mood, lowering his head as he leaned back against the bar, watching his angel take the last thing he had left from this relationship.

Leon compares this to the fact that you gave him the strongest and most beautiful wings when you agreed to be with him. Something truly pure and bright, which allowed him to fight with bioweapons, only for the sake of you and your kind. And now with relentless cruelty you are tearing these wings along with the spine. As the most severe punishment for a mistake.

You silently gather your things, trying not to let your hands shake as Leon watches your actions, fighting the urge to try to stop you again.

Inside, it feels like a guitar string is breaking or sad chords are playing in the soul. One sentence: All gone. You will be left behind, like another experienced chapter of his life, but the fact that the pages of this chapter were full of sincere joy only makes it worse.

Leon's eyes are on the lookout for anything that might help you change your mind. Turn the pages of the book of life a little back and rewrite the plot, correcting this misunderstanding. Although luck is not on his side again.

How to regain lost trust?

It was hardly possible. He could show you those messages from Ada, try to prove that the powder box has been in the trash for a long time, but would you believe him?

He called you by your name as you put the rest of your cosmetics in your bag, thinking that Leon didn't have anything particularly important from your things left. Of course, you turned around meeting with those eyes in which if you look for a long time you can drown, but now only Leon was choking of the two.

"You said then that I didn't promise you anything. it was true, I didn't really make any promises. No vows that I want a family, children and everything else that normal people have, since my work does not imply their presence." - Leon moved to a safe distance so you wouldn't feel uncomfortable. Unlike you, even when under stress, he was well oriented and adjusted to the situation, because your eyes were already watering. - "I don’t understand at all what you saw in me that you fell in love with so much, but it was not non-reciprocal. Maybe I didn't say much, but I meant it. These gifts, trips, dinners in restaurants..."

"In your words, I became like a gold digger who managed to find a rich fool." - You interrupted him with a loud squelching nose.

"What?... oh no! Fuck... I didn't mean it. I just know I screwed up. I have a whole carload of problems that I didn't want and don't want to involve you in. Ada - is in this carload . You are right, a lot connects me with her and the story is very long, but believe me, this is not at all what I really want. When I was 21, it was damn interesting. I was attracted to her for many years until that outbreak in Lanshiang. I won’t lie, we met not only on missions, but also after them; Ada has repeatedly saved and helped me; I will not lie and say that I have never had sex with her, but! There is a huge difference between the usual attraction to each other and really sincere feelings. And you were never fucking meat to me!" - Leon raised his voice, but not to hurt you. These crystal blue eyes resembling ice, no matter how paradoxical it may sound, could melt the heart of anyone. He was the one who could turn you into a puddle in seconds. - "From the moment you agreed to be with me, I had no relationship with Ada other than working. Even in my thoughts. We have our own style of communication - it's true. Flirting and banter, but when you showed up…I didn't need anything else."

"Nevertheless, you have loved her for more than ten years. It's not an attachment anymore, Leon. It's weird that I have to explain this to you." - There was no longer that stone in your chest that prevented you from speaking. You felt like a kind of abbess who reveals the truth to the boy standing in front of you (who was much older). - "We managed to get into all this dirt like this…"

"Was our relationship dirt for you?" - You looked up at him. You could clearly see the experience, pain and sadness. As if what happened broke him completely. Leon frowned, waiting for your long answer. - "I haven't always been open with you, and yes, you deserve a younger guy. Someone from your college or just a nice man your age. But you really were the best episode in my life, despite the fact that things weren't always smooth between us."

"It's not about me" - The lip gloss that you were restlessly twisting in your hands all this time finally fell out, rolling to Leon's feet, as if it was a sign to finally approach him, but you were afraid of getting burned again.- "Understand me… I want to be loved. For real. I'm not a fool either, although you probably think I am…"

"I never thought that about you. Naive, careless - yes. But you always had enough brains."

"Women like Ada Wong… -" you kept trying to ignore Leon's gaze. - "You can't get them out of your head. A kind of fatal beauty, capable of hitting any man to death. Such women have no rivals, and you do not consider it an insult, but she chose you, which means that you belong to her forever. However, you don't mind, do you? If I were you, I wouldn't be able to resist her either."

"Yes… - Leon smiled very unpleasantly, sitting down on the edge of the bed, throwing you your lip gloss, which you managed to catch and throw into a gym bag. - "Manipulation; constant concealment of information; a rather specific concept of "relationship". We've been lovers for a long time-I won't deny it, besides, it doesn't make sense. But I'm telling you the truth: you've become everything to me. As I could, I showed my love and care. Trust me, sweetheart , when you get into the same shit year after year, not knowing if you'll live to see the next day… well, it's a bit tedious. With Ada BEFORE YOU, I had some stability. The stability of our crazy meetings, yes, I had feelings. Until I realized that all this is fucking nonsense and it's not love at all, but an ordinary attachment to a person I've known for many years. And it was never love."

"More than ten years…" - Leon shook his head when you said those words one by one, slowly, as if savoring each. - "If you wanted to stop everything, you would stop it, but she is really a part of you that you will never let go. She occupies a big place in your heart, and I don't want to sit on the bench at all, so that during your next break you come to me. Don't you think it's unfair to me and my feelings?"

You trembled. The nerves began to give up again and the fingertips began to go numb, covered with a sticky cold sweat. Trying to listen to your own feeling, you only heard the frantic beating of your heart and the blood pounding in your ears. In some ways, it resembled a pre-fainting state. Part of you knew that Leon wouldn't do anything wrong, and the other part was terrified of the conversation going on.

You urgently needed to grab something to distract yourself. But most of the things were already in the bag.

On the other hand, it was hard to tell what Leon was thinking. His eyes focused on one point-you. A mixture of misunderstanding, irritation and bitterness in one bottle. He got the feeling that you were trying to convince him to believe your own lies, because during the time that you were together, Leon never gave a reason to think that there was someone third in his life.

But you felt something that you wanted to tell him against your better judgment for a long time. This is what you started falling asleep with when you first started suspecting him of cheating, despite the fact that it was very stupid.

"I thought my love was enough for you and me. I was ready to forgive you for the first mistake, Leon. I thought I could be irreplaceable for you, but now I realize that I'm not her equal."

"God, can you hear yourself?" - Leon ran his hand through his hair pulling it back, sincerely tired of explaining the same thing to you. As if you really were…blunt.

However, he didn't need to tell you, you yourself understood what he was thinking. And yes, it was stupid to come here again. You're really dumb.

"The conversation reached a dead end." - you continued to collect the rest of the things, once again capitulating to him.

"You're leading him to a dead end!" - Leon jumped up from his seat, shouting loudly at the top of his voice. You recoiled to the side, away from his formidable figure, next to which your own seemed very tiny. Your subconscious was still saying "don't be afraid," but your instincts were afraid of any violence. He could scream, he could hit… Leon never did this, it was the lowest act for him to hit another (unless circumstances require it), and disputes were generally resolved by ordinary conversation. You knew he could raise his voice, but Leon chose to leave before he reached boiling point. - "What else do I have to tell you to make you believe me?"

Your heart sank. But stand still. The commanding tone of the inner voice told you to resist, and apparently the small iron makings of your father's character were passed on to you. As a last resort, you quickly glanced towards the door, holding a bag in your hands, figuring out a plan in case of escape, and Leon noticed your strange behavior. Disappointed once again. In myself or maybe already in you? Do you really think he's such a monster?

"Why the fuck are you shaking so much?" - It wasn't funny anymore. Leon snatched the bag and threw it with all his might into a corner, not caring about the fragile contents. - "One big quarrel and I became the son of a bitch who beat you up or what? I'm not an angel, and with all my adoration, you're not a gift either! But did I hurt you at least once?!

"Yes!" - In a fit of emotion, you screamed, closing the distance with one big step. Leon chuckled. He meant physical pain, not mental pain. - "You hurt me. And it's still hard for me to live with this wound. I screwed up too. You know, I'm not the only loser here! And this is not a quarrel! You're a fucking jerk who still can't figure out his feelings. You didn't promise me shit, and it's my mistake that I came up with a big love for you ! But no one who has a conscience and respect for a partner will keep a compact of an ex-girlfriend and correspond with her in a joking manner. For some reason, my father does not allow himself to do this. No truly loving man will ever allow himself to do this! And instead of at least admitting the obvious, you convince me of something else! Tell me, Leon, if I did this to you, would you want to keep talking? Would you be able to trust me? "

"This shit has been lying there for a fucking cloud of time. I've already forgotten about her!"

Now both of you have switched to raised tones. You weren't scared anymore. The anger inside you was growing, erasing absolutely all the feelings that had been blunted before. Now you wanted to be fucking rude to him again, and that's probably what he liked about you. Leon even suspected that you would flare up like a match and be able to hit him.

"Forgot about the messages too?!"

"Fuck..." - It was unbearable to fight with you. Like a stubborn sheep who believed a stupid fool - his damn friend Carey. Leon pulled his phone out of his pocket and opened a message chat with Ada. There was no government information there, so he turned the screen to your face so that you could see what was written months earlier. But you didn't even look. Until Leon grabbed your wrist and put the smartphone in your hand. - "Look, read it since you're so sure that I still love Ada. It already seems to me that you are crazy about her".

Stubbornness was not always the best trait of your character, so you pressed the button on the side of the screen and just put the phone on the bedside table, making it clear that you would not stoop to such baseness to dig into other people's things. You also had a sense of your own worthiness.

"What happened?" - Leon croaked, taking a step forward. - "You wanted proof-I gave it to you."

"I don't want anything anymore Leon"

Only one thought was spinning in your head like a gear, "In vain. You shouldn't have come! Nobody got better from the fact that you disturbed this wound by reopening it." And yet you lied to yourself first of all. Leon's anger is caused by your disbelief, but even in a fit of the most terrible rage, he never did anything to you. Although you definitely felt uncomfortable from the tense atmosphere that had developed, where almost sparks were flying around the room, you still kept well with your arms crossed on your chest.

You needed Leon. You still wanted to love him and hugging a pillow at night you imagined that you were hugging him. But agreeing to be a fallback is also not in your style. There will still be a drop of pride for this.

So you just went to your bag, trying to pick it up to pick up the last belongings and leave, but Leon grabs your wrist. No pain. A firm grip is like a call to stop and give him a few more tries before he lets you go forever.

And you freeze, yielding to your instincts that purr sweetly from the slightest intimacy with this man. I wonder if Leon feels your pulse beating wildly? He lets go of your hand, biting his lower lip, and God, how you want to reach out to him to remember again what it's like to be his lover…

"So you came here just to break my heart again?" - his palms rested on your face, forcing you to look at him. For a second you suffocated drowning in the fragrance of his body and losing your mind looking into those eyes again. It's like they were pulling the soul out of you. - "Which of us is hurting the other more? First you reject me by running away for two months, then you pack up and say you never want to see me, but now you're coming back again… Of the two of us, who is the greater sadist?"

Your cheek pressed against his palm. A wave of heat spread throughout your body in small electrical discharges, as if you had taken a heavy intoxicating drug that turned you into clay in his hands. Leon pressed his forehead against yours, closing his eyes so that you could listen to the steady breathing and you were so waiting for the last kiss. At least a light touch of his lips…

Maybe in fact the main villain of this story was not Leon at all, but you yourself?

"I do not know," - somehow you whispered barely audible. Despite your closeness, you weren't sure Leon heard. -" I'm completely confused"

His bangs fell over your eyes, which made you smile a little.

"Do you want to leave?" - A question that made the body shudder with fright. As if you didn't want him to ask it to you, because an inner voice kept saying "no" and common sense began to doubt the correctness of the decisions made earlier. - "I don't want to let you go, but I can't forcibly hold you either. I really love you no matter what you think of yourself there, and it doesn't matter whether you believe me or not."

"I want to believe you but" - the voice trembled like a string. You lowered your gaze, trying to blink away the hateful tears despite the fact that Leon continued to hold your face.

"What?"

"I'm afraid." - you finally confessed, feeling a huge crack in your heart. Leon pressed you to his chest and you were grateful to him at that second because you no longer had the strength to control your emotions. - "I'm just afraid"

"My love? Or what?"

You didn't know what you were afraid of anymore. Leon pressed his cheek to the top of your head, holding the back of your head. Both of you didn't even notice how it started raining outside, creating an atmosphere of silence and loneliness. All that the soul craved was to stay standing like that for longer or even for an eternity. You feel his other hand on your waist, but you don't have the resolve to hug him back.

"It's not even about Ada, right?" - you didn't say anything. - "Do you really distrust me so much that you are ready to believe anyone but me?"

"You smelled of her perfume; you kept her things and never trusted me. I've always been away from you."

"Believe me angel, the shit that I constantly see haunts me almost every night and this is not what I want for you at all. Even if you begged me, I would never tell you about it. And about the rest…I have no idea what you smelled there."

Leon's words sounded like a final chord. No more excuses. Your body reflexively pressed against him, feeling the lost warmth of your native closeness, which caused the corners of Leon's lips to slightly rise up.

And in the end, you succumbed to the temptation of clasping his back with your trembling hands, covering your eyes from the fatigue of what is happening.

His lips touched your hair, and the noisy intake of breath that followed made him plunge into memories. It seemed like everything was covered in a misty haze, and your scent could make him lose his mind, even if it was for brief moments. The anxiety of a quick farewell enveloped the body, but there was something else… something that excites the mind regardless of temperature. A strange and at the same time precious emotion that has returned comfort to you two, affectionate behavior to each other, warmth of soul. This is something from the depths of the heart.

If Ada was a candle all this time, whose light illuminated a narrow space, then you were like the sun, whose warmth and beauty he missed so much. Leon realized that he was looking at a dazzling man with a huge sun inside, which dispelled all the darkness that had hung over him since the days of Raccoon City.

He knew he had no right to do that, and you could have pushed him away, but Leon wanted to feel your light one last time. Tearing you away from his shoulder so that the next moment he could press his lips to yours, memorizing your sweet taste. Like a rare nectar that can only be tasted once. A crushing kiss filled with belated remorse.

"Let this be my parting gift"

You're not annoyed or even angry. Whatever happens, you will always love him more than you should. So much time spent in vain to burn bittersweet feelings out of a stupid heart and stop following stupid emotions. Everything was absolutely in vain.

You pursed your lips when Leon started pulling away from you. As an avalanche hit a lonely wanderer, so you were dying at this second. leon believed that his love was hurting you and he is ready to step back so that you can heal, but the fact is that now you are at a crossroads again, not knowing the right way.

So maybe we should turn back?

You don't have an umbrella, just a thin jacket, and it's still raining mercilessly outside, as if someone is mourning the heavens. Drops trickle down the glass, and you wipe away your own tears, trying to listen to the footsteps behind you, but they are not there. A gigantic heaviness rolled over.

"It's stupid," you sobbed when you heard his voice, the one that cut you from the inside like a knife blade, forcing you to clench your teeth. - "I will never look for a meeting with you again, but still…stay with me."

"I..I can not…don't know" - Leon hugged you from behind again. Your voice was lost in hoarse sobs and if it weren't for his strong hands, your knees would hit the floor. It was as if the scenario of that day was repeating itself. - "I don't want to leave. I love you so much..."

You covered your mouth with your hand, unable to hold back your sobs any longer. It's just that emotions poured out in a flurry, turning you into a crying mess. However, the grip on your thin shoulders tightened when Leon turned you around to face him, holding you in a vice.

And your hand felt so good on his neck… Leon smiled as if he didn't want to know anything else in the world, starting to cover your tearful face with smudged kisses lingering on your lips and when you started answering all the barriers finally collapsed.

"So you'll stay." - no question. - "No more tears. No jealousy. You're here with me."

"Lee..on…" - with difficulty pronouncing his name, he burst into your mouth with a new kiss that stopped your breath. His tongue easily slid into your mouth intertwining with yours and you knew where to put yourself, allowing his hands to wander over your body.

"Either you leave now and never come back, or we send everything to hell and forget all the shit that happened to us. Choose now."

You were hanging around his neck, and to be honest, this really was your last chance to escape. It was only necessary to make a movement to the side, to pull away from him, but you stood still. One minute. Two… maybe the last two minutes of your sane thoughts.

You stayed, continuing to look into those sky-blue eyes, pressing your forehead against his, without interrupting eye contact. The person standing in front of you was irreplaceable, and now you would rather part with your life than agree to part with him.

Leon stroked your cheek with a funny peck on the lips, causing a sincere smile.

"Never dare to doubt me. Don't ever leave again. You and I will go somewhere far, far away from here. Let's drop everything and go to some house on the shore of the lake, where we will enjoy the tranquility and each other." - another kiss on the swollen nose. You just nodded, clinging to his T-shirt.

You've always been more of a vanilla girl, but Leon decided that rudeness would be superfluous. Not now and not tonight. He pulled off your clothes along with your underwear, throwing you on the soft bed that you already shared with him once and all you could think about was how he proved his love for you, holding you motionless in his arms, licking wet tracks from his cheeks. You didn't have the strength to fight him trying to take the initiative, the only thing you were thinking about was deep slow thrusts knocking moans out of your mouth. Leon was hugging you to him with great greed and a bit of fear, as if you could run away from him now. That's why he whispered soothing words and praise in your ear all the while tucking your hair back.

"I love you. You have no right to think otherwise. You're just my pretty girl, look at me, beautiful" - Leon threw you on the pillow, forcing you to open your eyes. Panting, you obeyed, wrapping your legs around his torso, pressing even closer to him, while Leon found your hand, twining your fingers together. - "I need you. You're my favorite girl, I love you so much. More than anything in the world, I value you, don't you dare leave me anymore, angel."

His smooth movements were maddening. Leaning over to you, he caught your lips pulling into a gentle kiss, but you immediately interrupted him leaning against his cheek like a petting cat, losing his head and blushing from vulgar pops and squelching sounds due to the abundance of lubricant.

"Don't leave me," - you freed your hands trying to straddle him, but Leon crossed your sad attempt pressing only harder to the mattress. - "I'm not leaving anymore, I swear. I'm so sorry… I've never wanted anyone more than you. Only you…my love…"

He was so gentle with you. There could be bruises from your closeness in some places, but you felt as good as ever in all the past months of separation. A loud moan escaped his lips when he plunged into you too deeply. His seed soiled your belly when he cum snuggling up to you.

You don't remember exactly when your sanity returned to you, but you definitely felt it when Leon, after the second round and long hugs with compliments, took you to the shower where he carefully washed off the traces of your intimacy with him, gently kissing and sucking every bruise left from his fingers, promising that he would take care of it in the morning.

You ran your fingers over his wet bangs, brushing it away from his eyes, which Leon used when he picked you up under the hips after taking a hot shower to take you back to his bed and let you rest.

Actually, the bed linen should have been changed too, but you two didn't care at all. Leon pulled you closer to him, laying you on his chest, hugging you with both hands, stopping any attempts to escape, but you were no longer planning to run anywhere. He fell asleep pretty quickly, and you lay motionless next to him for another hour, tormented by a feeling of hunger and thinking how you could get to the refrigerator without disturbing a light sleep. His shirt was left lying on the floor and with an awkward movement, as if deceiving a sleeping man with the desire to turn over, you carefully free yourself from the ring of embraces by getting out of bed. You take a cursory glance at Leon, making sure that he is still asleep and throw it on hastily without even buttoning his shirt, leaving the bedroom with light steps with the obvious intention of robbing his refrigerator.

Slowly and on tiptoe… wanting to have a snack at least with a sandwich, you realize when you open the door that a mouse has hanged itself in the refrigerator. Nothing particularly edible, and what Leon ate all this time, also remains a mystery.

Although it seems the cheese seemed quite usable. It's not too satisfying after a particularly sinful night, but you can last until morning. You already want to close the door when suddenly you realize with a sixth sense that someone is standing behind you, forcing you to freeze in place with a slice of cheese in your teeth.

But Leon just stroked your thighs laughing at the silent scene.

"I'm hungry" - That's the whole excuse. - "I'm sorry, but I won't fall asleep if I don't eat something…"

"I told you not to leave me anywhere." - It sounded harsh, but with obvious notes of playfulness, especially since Leon was clearly staring at your breasts. - "You could have asked me instead of running away again. God, stop eating that cheese. I don't want you to get poisoned!"

"Then feed me something or I'll starve to death. I definitely won't be able to return from the other world."

Leon took the fucking cheese out of your hands after enjoying this sweet conversation between two lovers and one hungry heart and threw you over his shoulder carrying you back to the bedroom, putting you back in his bed.

"And now you're lying or sitting in bed like the obedient girl you are while I bring us something to eat. If you are not in this place, blame yourself. You've already rubbed my nerves and yours enough, angel." - You nodded, still feeling the residual stress from the hysteria you experienced, but you were still smiling sweetly, hanging one leg over the edge of the bed, teasing Leon a little, who was getting dressed all this time. He noticed your stupid game and took a leather jacket from the closet on the way out of the bedroom tickled your heel, forcing you to hide it back under the blanket.

"You're staying here. So that when I come back, and it will be very soon, I will find you in this very place." - Notes of sadness and fatigue were still hovering in his eyes, so you didn't argue, but just agreed.

"I'll be here. It's raining outside anyway and I don't have an umbrella with me."

Leon flicked you on the nose, clearly not appreciating the joke. He didn't even ask what you wanted, even though he already knew about your taste preferences. Therefore, as soon as the door slammed shut, you quickly reached for your mobile phone, answering missed calls from your parents, explaining to them that you just dozed off and didn't hear the mobile. In general, you have found something to do by digging into your phone, checking messages and flipping through the news feed in the social network, thinking only about Leon and the food that he should bring soon.

It all still seemed unreal. You looked at the corner where your abandoned bag was left lying around, as if confirming reality. It's unlikely to be possible to pretend that nothing happened and Leon really looked too tired, but right now you didn't want to think about anything else except his return. Perhaps you have already suffered enough and you really should go on vacation together somewhere away from the hustle and bustle of the world? Leon will probably want to talk about this topic again with a fresher head when he calms down a little.

In the end, finding you sleeping in his bed was a really beautiful reality that he was afraid he had already lost. In his shirt, with pretty bare thighs, sleeping lightly on his pillow. Leon put the bag of food on the table, taking off his jacket just to hug you, proving to himself once again that this is really not a dream.

You really stayed with him and he won't let you leave anymore.

[nattylvr]

When you get a taste, can you tell me what’s my flavor?

requested\ yes

a/n: i got a request for a Tai slowburn, so you know i had to make it a homoerotic friendship, hope you enjoy it💞

warnings: best friends longing for each other, talk about exes, a little bit of angst

summary: You and Taissa were just friends, right?

Taissa was your best friend, nothing more, nothing less. You were on the same soccer team and you did everything together, but that’s normal, right?

Anyhow, her birthday was this Saturday and you made it your personal mission to let her have the best birthday ever, the one she’ll always remember. The whole squad was in on it, you already agreed with Lottie to have it at her huge ass house, nicely decorated. Nat and Van were gonna take care of the booze, and Jackie and Shauna were on food. You had the hardest task of all, and that was to convince her to show up. You’d thrown her a rager, with the whole school invited basically, but it wasn’t any good if she wasn’t there. Now, she loves parties, big ones, but convincing her to casually go to Lottie’s house on her birthday? That was gonna be tough, since Tai is known to be stubborn.

“How do you think i should convince her to come?” You asked Lottie, who was sat next to you at our lunch table

“What, you haven’t told her yet?” Lottie asked a little shocked

“No, of course not! I want it to be a surprise!” You said like it was the most obvious thing in the world

“Jesus Christ…I have no idea. But you better figure it the fuck out, or it’ll all have been for nothing!” Lottie said annoyed

“I kno-“

“What will have been for nothing?” Taissa asked, appearing behind us

“Uhh, my studying for the math quiz, if I don’t do well” Worst lie in history. Lottie seemed to think so as well when she had to hold back a laugh

“I’ll meet you guys later” Lot said getting up, the tension could’ve been cut with a knife

Tai sat across me, you kept eating and refusing to look her in the eye.

“Is there something you’re not telling me?” Tai asked knowing you couldn’t lie for too long

“No, everything is good…I mean not like good, just like…normal.” Good job!

“Mhm…and I definitely didn’t hear you talking about a surprise, right?” She asked staring right at my soul

“Fine, God I threw you a party…and it was supposed to be a surprise.” You said defeated

“Wha- Wait like a legit party?” Tai asked

“Yeah It’s at Lottie's, I made like a thousand written and copied invitations for our entire class and it said ‘Don’t mention to Taissa’ with these big red letters” When you told her about it you sounded kinda dorky to yourself, but it didn’t seem that way to her at all

“Don’t shy away, that’s so sweet of you! And I’ll totally act surprised in front of the others if you want me to.” She said holding your hand on the table gently

“Oh will you, reallyyy?” You asked her, you really wanted the girls to think she was mesmerized by your oh so hard work

“Yeah, sure.” She said not letting go of your hand

That was a success, but you couldn’t shake the feeling of only one thing.

Her hand was so soft

You just wanted to hold it forever. But that’s normal for best friends, right?

Yet there you were, supposed to be focusing on a test while thinking of Taissa’s hands

When school was done, you got in your car, of course you were giving Tai a ride, so you waited for her. It is safe to say when you saw her exiting school you were not happy. She was walking with Van who she used to date. In her defense they did break up on good terms, but you still didn’t like it. But that’s normal, you were just looking out for your friend, right?

“Hey sweetie” Tai said opening the passenger seat door and getting in

“Hi love…so what are you gonna wear tomorrow?” You asked her in anticipation

“Well I was thinking that orange dress, with the headband, they match” She said touching up her gloss, looking in her compact mirror

“I’m not sure whether to wear a dress at all.”

“You should, you always wear baggy clothes.” Tai said

“Why does that matter?” You asked her as you started to drive

“Well you look super hot when you dress up.”

She was leaning her head against the seat looking right at you. At this point you were really hoping she wouldn’t notice the slight redness that spread across your cheeks. I mean it’s still normal to blush when your friend compliments you…

As you got home you basically tried on your entire closet. You really wanted her to be impressed by your look, and didn’t even realize it had been hours. How is it possible you have quite literally nothing to wear? However in a time of crisis you dialed the first person who came to mind for fashion advice.

“Jackie! I need serious help.” You leaned against the wall, whining to her on the phone

“What’s going on?” She didn’t even need to ask who called, that kinda humbled you

“I need fashion advice! Like what the fuck do I wear for Tai to think I’m hot?” That last part must’ve just slipped out…

“What? Why would you want Tai to think you’re hot?” She asked, sounding genuinely confused

“Just forget I said that, but pleaseeeee Jackie You have to lend me something!”

“Fine, fine…I’ll give you the red dress, the one I gave Shauna some time ago”

“The boob dress?”

“That would be the one…”

“Okay, you’re the best. Love ya mwah mwah” You said, not waiting for her to say anything before hanging up

You still couldn’t shake the feeling of quite a few things. Why were you so obsessed with Taissa thinking you look good? And why were you so envious of Van, it didn’t make any sense to you. You kept thinking about these things until you fell asleep and the next day subtly rolled around. You were woken up by the doorbell at around 10am, and your mother calling you over, telling you that it’s for you.

“Jackie, hey” You said, opening the door and seeing the paper bag in her hand

“Hey, I came to drop off the dress…you look like shit, did you sleep okay?” She asked bluntly

“Gee, thanks…I slept okay I just have a lot on my mind.” Well you weren’t lying

“If you say so, here you go.” She said handing me the bag

“Thanks. Wanna come in?” You didn’t really want her to, but you did ask her to be polite

“No I have to go to back home, my mom is having people over for brunch…I’ll see you tonight.”

“Okay, bye.”

As the day slowly but agonizingly passed, you started getting ready. You did your makeup all nice, same for your hair, and were genuinely amazed by how good your boobs looked in that dress. Now you were supposed to pick up Tai.

Why were you so nervous over it

Nevertheless, you made it to her house, watching her exit her home. You jaw almost went slack on the floor because of how beautiful she looked. How was it even possible?

“Happy birthday Tai!” You squealed when she entered the car

“Thank you love” She said putting on her seatbelt and smiling at you

“ I’m so excited to get fucked up” You said as you started driving over to Lottie’s

“Yeah well not too fucked up, you know how you get” She said mockingly

“I’m not that bad at all!” You try to defend yourself

“Dude you are so lightweight.” She said like it was the most obvious thing in the world

You had a small pit in your stomach as you parked by the house. It was a gnawing feeling that something was gonna happen and ruin your mood. But for the time being you chose to ignore it and make sure Tai has fun. She played off the fake surprise perfectly, and you lot got to partying your asses off.

But that gross gut feeling turned out to be true. The more she drank the more she hung out with Van. They were all touchy and it was making you sick. Drink after drink you started losing your mind, and danced with the first person who asked you to do so. Little did you know Taissa was on the verge of tears when she saw you grinding against someone else.

You didn’t even know how you felt anymore. Everything was fuzzy and you couldn’t make out a single familiar face. That is, until you saw Natalie sitting by the bonfire with her burnout friends, deciding to go and recollect yourself there.

“Hey Nat”

“Oh, hi” She said. You could see she was high off her ass.

“You havin’ fun?” She asked

“No.” Natalie was easy to talk to, especially when you were both out of it

“Oh, what happened?” She asked nonchalantly, but you knew she did care

“I think I’m in love with my best friend.” You couldn’t believe you actually said it out loud. After all this time denying it to yourself and everyone around you, it felt a bit freeing

“Yeah no shit” She said with a small chuckle

“That obvious?”

“…Yeah” Nat said confronting you

“You should drink some water”

“So should you”

“Touchè”

___________________________________________

After sobering up a little you found yourself playing truth or dare with about 20 kids. Tai and Van were still attached at the hip, it made you wanna throw up.

“Okay, birthday girl. Truth or dare?”

You didn’t really catch who asked her

“Hmm…dare” Taissa said holding her red solo cup and taking a sip of her beer

“I dare you…to make out with your little girlfriend”

Van, they were talking about Van. Your heart flipped as you silently prayed she wouldn’t go through with it.

“Dare’s a dare” She said as she kissed her ex. You couldn’t even take it, so you ran off to your car, sitting in it and weeping for a few minutes until you heard someone come in

___________________________________________ Taissa’s POV

I kissed Van and it felt almost nauseating. She was into it, eveyone was. Kinky teenage boys screaming for us, which made it so much worse. As i finally pulled away i noticed that y/n was gone. I sat there not sure what to do. I went to the kitchen to get a drink and take my mind off of her.

“Well you successfully made her jealous” Van’s voice.

“What?” I asked, knowing full well that was what I tried to do

“Your best friend, the one who basically ran off?” Van said

“I wasn’t trying to-“ I try to defend myself

“Look Tai, her car’s still out front. Do what you gotta do” Van said and her words cut deep as a knife. I basically ran over to her, as i found her with ruined mascara and that awful, sad look in her eyes.

___________________________________________ Your POV

“Taissa?” You said as you saw her with a worried look on her face

“Listen, I was such an idiot for doing that, but I’m here now, okay?” She said completely out of breath

“Tai what are you-“

You were cut off by her lips pressing against yours. She captured you in the sweetest kiss you had ever exchanged, the perfect first one. As her arms were around your neck, your hands found her waist, pulling her flush against you

“That.”

[wheucto]

new BFDIA episode out already??

spoilers and stuff below

kevin macleod??? the royalty-free music guy??? in MY bfdi?

they really out here killing every new host. how many hosts are we going to go through by the end of this season? is this how BFDIA gets canceled?

also! this... place. my first thought when i saw this was "hive" (since bug episode), but that might not be the case. it looks vaguely crystalline, which seems like the best description. it also reminded me of a kaleidoscope, though it's not centered on anything... i'll call it "Crystalline Kaleidoscope" for now. oh, and it has vaguely crystalline noises.

the sequence was presented inside the normal episode, but i don't think it happens concurrently with it. i think it happens after the episode, or like... after coiny dies or something.

originally, i thought the CK was pin's conciousness, and then like... an afterlife or something. we haven't seen any other afterlives other than the trash compactor one, but it could be like... literally anything. like this. i'm not so sure about that right now, but it does seems like a very possible outcome.

but, pin and coiny died by different manners (coiny dies by poison, pin died by mud). also, pin remembers the trash compactor afterlife, which might mean that she's dead in this sequence (and coiny is by extension, or being visited through ghost sheniganery). at the end of the sequence, it becomes brighter, which either means he's recovered or waking up.

i think the most likely outcomes for where CK is are either an afterlife or some sort of telepathy.

and in the end of this sequence, pin's plan is for coiny to send her and him to the trash compactor afterlife ("there's one place where i can be my whole self again!...far, far away...to get there we will have to get compacted [note: compacted is said in TTS]." (i.e. trash compactor afterlife)). in this place, she will have all the things taken away from her (face, limbs, size), even if she will look strange - so it makes sense she wants to be here. but... why does she remember this? no one else did.

perhaps it's because she's dead, and when you're dead, you can remember any previous afterlives. however, spongy seemed confused in bfdia 9 when he entered the TCA. though, he might have never died in this particular way before, so not remembering the TCA would be understandable. maybe, instead, she's not dead but not quite alive either, allowing her to access knowledge she should only have while dead but still being alive is some form.

also also, i don't see why she has to die in this particular way. if there are multiple afterlives, then this is just one of many. perhaps she only specifically remembers TCA for some reason? but if so, why? i suppose we'll only find out in the next episode.

anyways. the mysterious "they" she talks about is interesting. my first thought was the creators of the show, which is pretty meta, but it could be anyone. i get the feeling that the "they" mentioned here is more of a group, but "they" could be a singular person aswell.

alright that's all i want to say in this post. mostly about CK lol

[olderthannetfic]

Re: https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/738859016693874688/why-do-some-popular-things-have-such-small & the person who replied to it in Another ask about Slay The Princess --

This answer was a facinating read as someone currently in the James Cameron's Avatar fan space -- i was only 8/9 when the first movie came out, and wasnt very into fandom Yet, but around the early 2010's when i Did get into it and went looking, there was almost Nothing to be found (and the few that Did exist were either short character studies written by some of the smartest people on the planet or troll fics), less than a 1,000 Total in the media tag on ao3 iirc?? And i remember feeling Fine with that, for the exact readon you both mentioned -- the first Avatar is a very well rounded film, no matter what everyone cares to say about it. It was Written to be a stand alone film, and bc JC is good at what he does, that Worked, and there truly wasnt much to write fic about besides Extreme au shenanigans or a few theoretic between-scenes, you know the type.

Then the second movie came out Last year and then the Game came out THIS and the fandom has just. Exploded. It's almost funny because so many of the younger fans, who were in it for x readering with the Sully kids, keep complaining about how "the fandom is dying 😭😭" in the tags the past few months and i just have to stare at it like pal just because we're not still shooting metaphorical fireworks about how much we loved the sequel and game doesnt mean we've all Moved On 😩 Im still Diligently mpregging the resurrected villain in my new longform crack fic thats probably going to be finished around the time the 5th movie comes out. Wee child you must Power through with us. Increase Your Fandom Stamina 💪😎🏃‍♂️!!!

But yeah it's just been Extremely interesting seeing how drastically things have changed, going from that completed, hard-to-write Wholeness from how compact the first film was vs the Flood of worldbuilding and lore and new characters we've been given (and have yet to Get, there may be some evil f/f fics beyond the horizon...) and how much the Sequel has contributed in the process of making Avatar easier to enjoy Casually, rather than as a "stereotypical", "extreme" strawman'd Avatar fan of yor (our elders who i respect most vehemently, for their help in understanding and writing the Na'vi conlang in all our fics 💪❤).

Even though the canon movies have a lot of problems, ive been luckiy enough to see the Fandom do what its always done best -- ive met wonderful people and Incredible artists while the life experience + background knowledge who can flesh out the areas of the concept that JamCam has yet to delve into, for whatever reasons he claims to have, and ive And others have felt moved enough by it all to start writing our Own incredibly self indulgent and sincere stories, within the same framework! Bc good lord it really is a sandbox. The moment you start diving into all the Implications of Avatar's universe, how the RDA is run, how Eywa works, etc etc etc.... jesus. ive lost so many hours of sleep reading real academic papers on Actual xenobiology (yes its a real thing, it both is And isnt what you think it is) for these movies, its nuts.

So some days like Now i just have to sit here like. Wow. We built this house And made it a home. and its Awesome. these asks made me want to gush about it 🥰 thats all! tysm!! Love this blog SO much, keep up the great work n have an awesome day everyone!!!

--

[oubliette-odette]

The Reluctance of Love Pt. 17

Orc Male x Half-Elf Male, Fated Mates, Forbidden Love, Slow Burn Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16 Word Count: 2257 (average 17 min read) Content Warnings: mention of mating, homophobia, fantasy racisms. All orcish is from orcishdictionary.com, created by Matt Vancil.

Altan POV

It was two, maybe three miles of walking in the dim torchlight through the underground path before we noticed the compact dirt and mud slowly transition to rock and stone. We started to recognize that the tunnel was leading us to some kind of cave. The walls became jagged, not uniform and smoothed down like the dirt. The walls were slick with damp and I felt my shoes struggle to stay balanced.

Drunrag’s hands were immediately on mine as he led me delicately through the uneven parts. His eyes were keen and I knew he could see better in the dark than I could. And it showed as he stepped carefully and purposefully, and I did my best to leap behind him and land where he landed. 

The cave widened and we found that the mouth of the cave was cleverly concealed behind foliage. There was a sound of rushing water and we quickened our pace to follow it. 

Drunrag pulled the foliage back and I stepped through and waited for him to follow. Everything was difficult to see during the night, but it looked as if the entrance of the cave opened just below a bridge that crossed over a small, steady stream that ran off from the river we could hear. There wasn’t enough water to reach the mouth of the cave  and we were able to quickly scramble through the rocks and pebbles to get onto soft land. 

Drunrag threw the torch into the river and watched as the light fizzled and died out. He took a hold of my hand and said softly. “I can see enough to lead us on.”

I trusted him with complete complicity and I squeezed his hand in return.

“Do you need to rest?” he asked.

I shook my head. “Let’s go.” I answered.

I didn’t know what time it was, but I could make a guess that we were approaching the peak of night. Everything was dark and I found myself holding onto Drun’s hand like a vice. I had read once that orc’s made great hunters thanks to their ability to see well in the dark. A perk to having an orc for a partner, I thought wryly. 

“How far are we?” I asked. “From the city?”

Drun looked around, I couldn’t see much of his features, no more than a shadow in the dark, but I could see the whites of his eyes as he observed our surroundings. “We look to be just a half mile from the gates.”

“That’s not far enough.” I breathed. “The guards are probably on horseback and will gain on us in little time. At least we have the shadow of night as our advantage. Do you see anywhere we can hide ourselves?” 

I was able to catch my breath as Drunrag planned our route. Even with everything happening, I couldn’t stop myself from exulting in some small way at that moment. My hand was being held by one who I had spent the last few months literally dreaming about. I knew we weren’t totally free yet, there was still so much risk, but I felt something strong and pounding inside me telling me how right this all was. I didn’t doubt or regret choosing this over a comfortable life.

“This way.” He said softly and he began to pull me through the darkness. “I see a copse of trees over there.”

We walked swiftly, yet quietly. I knew I was holding Drun back, that I was the slow one in the group, but he said nothing and he kept his hand on mine and never let go. The grass was dry and brittle and even with our careful steps rustled and crumbled loudly beneath our feet. Every so often, I would find myself looking back, waiting to see a line of torchlight pursuing us and every moment I didn’t see it, I grew more worried.

We rested in the dark cover of the trees and gathered ourselves before moving on to our next destination. Drun’s attention was tuned in to everything around us. I could hear him sniff the air and adjust our course to avoid something only he knew about. 

“Are you alright?” He asked. He was so good at being worried for me. I felt warm every time he asked me.

I nodded. “Fine.”

“We should only rest for a moment here,” He said, his eyes looking at the town behind us. “I’m nervous still being so close. We should go as far as we can and take a long rest when there is some distance between us. Perhaps at dawn.”

Dawn. That was still likely hours away from now. I let out a breath. 

I saw him shift to look at me again, “Will you manage?”

“I will. I have to.” I answered, determined. I adjusted the pack on my shoulders and rose to my feet. It was laughable how even as I stood at my full height, Drunrag managed to reach my shoulders sitting. I still wasn’t used to how large, how massive he was. He probably could carry me if he wanted. The thought of it was tempting.

I brushed the thoughts aside and changed the subject, “Do you have somewhere in mind we should go?”

“North.” He answered, I detected a touch of reluctance in his voice as he said it. “My family would be able to provide us asylum. They live in the Fields of the Dead.”

A pleasant name for a stretch of land, but it was the unfortunate burial ground for hundreds of soldiers from centuries worth of battles and conflicts throughout our history. I remembered hearing stories of the undead that would rise and wander through the fields. How the soil smells of blood. I wondered how or why a tribe of orcs would find themselves living there, but I dared not ask questions. The idea of seeing Drunrag’s family was something I had never considered. I had foolishly made the assumption that there was little contact between them. I sensed the anxiety it caused Drunrag to take us there, and I couldn’t help but feel a similar sense of dread at the idea of it.

“Oh.” I responded. “Will…will we be safe there?”

“They would be wise to not touch you.” His voice was heavy and low and it made my body shiver as I felt the possessiveness of those words. 

“What about you?” I asked.

There was not an answer for a long while and I worried that I had asked the wrong question.

“I can handle my family.” He finally answered.

I hoped what he said was true, because I still felt a pit in my stomach at the thought of having to face them down.

We let the silence settle as we adjusted our packs, caught our breath and stretched, only it ended quickly when Drun grabbed my arm suddenly and hissed, “The gates are opening, we need to leave.”

I whirled around and saw the faint dim specks of torchlight in the distance and felt my heart begin to pulse loud and pounding inside me. 

Hand in hand, we set out in the field. I was once again blind in the night and let Drunrag guide us through. He would shift our direction every so often and he often looked back to assess our pursuers. We were traveling once again in open fields. In daylight such a thing would spell our doom, but in the thick of night with little moonlight, we were safe, hopefully long enough to find cover.

My breath was all I could hear as I did my best to keep astride with Drunrag. I knew he was slowing down for me, but even still my legs were starting to scream at me for rest after having run this much already. I didn’t pull back though, instead I gritted my teeth and pressed on. 

“They’re gaining on us.” Drunrag said between breaths. “We’ll need to find cover soon.”

We picked up speed and I started to feel like I was being dragged behind him. 

“Here.” He said and we were suddenly taking a sharp turn and climbing up a small slope until we were resting against large protruding rocks. They were chill to the touch and I pressed my cheek against it. Drun then enveloped himself around me, I felt his broad chest against my back, heaving slow, steady breaths. His arms were on either side of me, pulling me tightly to him. I let myself be held as he pressed us against the rock and we both held still and waited. 

I did my best to still my breathing, but I was still winded from running. Now that I was pulled into Drun’s embrace, my cheek was pressed against his chest and I felt the even rise and fall of his breathing. I could see hardly anything except the arm that was around my front that helped me to stay right next to him and then the dim view of the fields below us, a large dark blanket of shadow with no shape or form. I burrowed closer to him and I felt his chin rest above my head and he squeezed me tightly to him.

We heard the pounding of hooves and  from my limited perspective, I caught sight of four separate torches emitting light across the field. They looked to be at least a half mile away from us, so I couldn’t recognize anyone from where we were. 

My body was stock still and unmoving as I watched between Drun’s arms. The men were spread out, circling around and advancing forward. Their horses were light on their feet and danced across the field from one side to the other, covering distance in only a few seconds.

Drun turned his head away from them and buried his head into me. We held still, so still. My heart was out of control inside me, begging that we live through this, that we get through this night. 

I closed my eyes, a prayer on my lips to protect us, oh great gods preserve us.

“Not here!” A voice called. It sounded like it had only been a few yards away. I felt the twitch and flex in Drun’s body at the sound of it and he gripped me tighter. I heard the pounding of the hooves fade off as they returned back to the team and they continued on. 

We each were frozen for a time before I felt Drun’s muscles relax  and he pulled away only slightly.

“What now?” I barely breathed the words out loud.

“We wait.” He answered. 

We didn’t speak, we didn’t even so much as look at each other as we sat in the horrid dark of night. The sounds of the guards in pursuit were fading.

I started to lift my head to look out when Drun pressed me closer to his chest. “Not yet.” He hissed. “There could be more.”

I held back and I let myself be held. Drun’s body was warm, his chest damp with sweat. Under normal circumstances I might have found that to be a sensual thing…but I barely registered it at that moment as I held my breath. 

I didn’t know how much time passed, only that my body ached and certain parts felt numb before, I shifted and shuffled and stretched until I was facing him and I leaned my back against the wall. I kept my hands up to my chest. I felt his arms adjust around me and pulled me safely into his chest. 

“Where do you think they are? Still searching?”

“Most likely. I can smell them nearby,” he said. “We can’t accept the risk of continuing our travel if they're still out there.”

“So.” I started, “We wait?”

I felt his head nod against the side of my head. 

I took in a deep, long breath and took in Drun’s scent. It was a manly smell - mostly sweat now, but I noticed the underlying reminiscent scent of Doxxah’s bakery and then an even more permanent smell of earth and ash on him, reminding me of when I first met him on the sunny day on the coast, dressed to work in the hot fires of the forge. 

I jerked back when I also caught a faint whiff of something sweet, more fragrant. “Is that…cologne I smell?”

I wish I could have seen his face as I heard the bashfulness in his voice. “Doxxah helped me.”

I leaned in and took in another long breath, “It’s…it’s nice. Kind of fruity. I think it suits you.”

I felt him tense and he shivered.

I lifted my head up. “Are you alright?”

“Tickles.” He answered.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” I didn’t realize until then how my nose was practically pressed into his collarbone. I moved to adjust myself, but his arms didn’t let up.

“Don’t. I don’t mind.” He said, his lips were just above my ears and I felt the vibration of his voice. I too shivered in response.

We held each other there and I found myself struggling to keep my eyes opened and my mouth would open wide with a long, drawn out yawn. 

“You may sleep, if you want.” He said, “I’ll keep watch.”

I blinked and shook my head, “I’m okay, I’ll stay up.”

“Orcs are built to endure.” He said. “You need rest.”

I knew he was right, but I was feeling so helpless at that moment. I opened my mouth to protest when I felt a hand on the back of my head. He cradled it tenderly and whispered in my ear. “Nod Merad, sleep.”

I didn’t know what the words meant, but he said them with such gentleness, it was soothing and kind. I didn’t know that orcish could be gentle, and I closed my eyes wondering what other gentle words I would someday hear from him.

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@eltrolodecadadia

[brightlight-dazzlingeyes]

november with you | kylian mbappé (part ii/iii)

kylian mbappé x original female character [+18]

synopsis: alice has been living in paris for a year, she found a perfect job and a perfect boyfriend in this city, but the cold of november is bringing back old memories she wishes she could forget. warnings: established relationship; mentions of cheating; angst; mentions of smut; domestic fluff; i have never been to france; minors dni.

(this is a sequel to the french exit, but can be read as standalone)

previous chapter | masterlist | next chapter

Part II — What Was I Made For?

“When did it end? All the enjoyment

I'm sad again, don't tell my boyfriend”

In the bathroom of an exclusive Parisian nightclub, Alice leans heavily against a sink countertop. The thumping bass coming from outside the bathroom door did little to help her regain her composure. She blinks, struggling to focus on her own reflection.

The fluorescent cold white light cast stark shadows, revealing smudges of mascara beneath her eyes and the slight crookedness of her eyeliner. Her reflection seemed to sway as she tried to fight her unsteady state.

Alice had taken Clara’s invitation for a ‘girls night out’, while Kylian enjoyed the night with his friends. They both agreed to go their separate ways for the evening, enjoying the company of their own group of friends.

Now, in this upscale club, Alice looked like a beautiful mess, but not the happy kind. A sense of hopelessness weighed on her as she stared at her own reflection. She had taken a few drinks, but as she fixed her makeup, she was filled with a deep sense of melancholy.

Partying just doesn't feel the same as it did a couple of years ago. Alice can't help but feel like time's catching up with her.

As she looked deep into her own eyes, she felt like a character – like the protagonist of a cliché story that never bothered to give her too many defining traits. What else did she have going for her besides looks and wealth?

Her shaky hands fished out her Dior makeup from her Miu Miu black leather clutch. The compact powder had a cool touch against her skin as she tried to apply it, her eyes still sparkling from a few too many drinks, but now revealing an underlying sadness.

The task of putting on lipstick became a mission as the tube wobbled in her tipsy grip, making her feel even more inadequate.

A voice from outside the bathroom door called her name, a friend checking up on her. With one last, slightly exaggerated attempt to fix her eyeliner, she took a deep breath and did her best to steady herself before rejoining her friends, using her meticulously reapplied makeup as a shield to hide her sadness.

Kylian comes home before she does – he feeds the cat, takes a warm shower and then patiently waits on the couch for what feels like an eternity, or roughly 30 minutes, until his beloved returns.

Finally, the door swings open, and Alice stumbles in. She looked like a young, clumsy Bambi as she attempted to walk in high heels. Her fingers clung tightly to the doorknob as she swayed for a moment, catching her balance.

Kylian holds back a laughter as he watches, curious to see her next move. To his surprise, Alice doesn't go in his direction. Instead, she slowly lowered herself to the floor, her back pressed firmly against the now closed door. There, at the entrance, she sat and stared at him.

"Did you have fun?" He asks, though he already had a good idea of her answer.

Alice simply nods, her shyness showing, and throws the question back at him. "Did you?"

Kylian pauses for a moment, considering before he replies, “I’m afraid not as much as you did.”

Alice's cheeks flushed with embarrassment. This kind of behavior had earned her countless reprimands in her previous relationship, and the memories still stung. She wasn't afraid of Kylian, but a nagging guilt tugged at her as she realized she was being happy without him – or at least was giving him the idea that she was being happy without him.

“I’m sorry.” Escaped her lips.

“What are you apologizing for?” Kylian furrows his brow.

"I got drunk!" She stated, as if it was the most evident thing in the world. In her mind, she believed she was articulating her feelings perfectly, explaining that even before her ex, her mother never approved this type of behavior. But instead, she just giggles.

“That's all?” Kylian gets up from the couch, understanding a bit better as he approaches her. Alice, still sitting on the floor, nods again, not comprehending why he remained so calm.

“We’re not fighting?” She asks, struggling to look up to him as she feels nauseous.

“Over a few drinks? No.” Kylian sits next to hear, close enough to hear the soft ‘oh’ that slipped from her lips. 

Her surprise was evident. Now that she didn't feel the need to explain herself further, words began to spill out of her. "I usually don't get jealous of you... Sometimes, there's a thing, but it passes," she admits, her words are slow and drawn out. "I'm more scared... I think, of you being jealous of me... Because... I don't want you to think I'm a slut." She reaches out, intertwining their fingers. "What I did... To David... I'm not doing it to anyone, I'm not doing it ever again. I promise."

Kylian listens attentively, grateful that she was opening up to him. He couldn't help but feel they should have had this conversation a long time ago.

"I trust you, baby, I really do," he reassures her. He plants a firm kiss on her forehead before continuing, "Let's not be jealous of each other, ever. I don't think that would be good for us." There was more he wanted to say, but he was afraid that she might not remember their conversation in the morning. ‘You got home safely, that’s all that matters to me’, he will say in the morning.

When Kylian says he trusts her, he really means it. He's got her figured out, knows when he's got her undivided attention, and can tell when her mind's off on a little wander. Plus, he's got this unwavering confidence – it's never once occurred to him that Alice could ever cheat on him.

In the quietness of their cozy bedroom, Kylian carefully slips off Alice's high-heeled shoes, placing them down gently. Seated on the edge of the bed, he cradled her feet in his hands and began a soothing massage, finding just the right pressure to chase away the discomfort. A contented sigh escapes Alice's lips. After the massage and helping her take a warm bath, they crawled into bed together, Kylian enveloped her in his arms, pulling her close. Before they knew it, exhaustion took over them, and they drifted off to sleep, cuddled together.

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last night / this morning

clarabonnet je t'aime bien 💓

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They wake up together, tangled under the duvet. With a shared, contented sigh, they exchange sleepy smiles; their faces illuminated by the gentle morning light. Alice finds herself gradually getting closer to Kylian, his warm chest is a welcome contrast to the chill in the room. Their lips meet in a series of slow, lazy kisses. 

It's a moment of pure comfort and intimacy, as they savor the simple joy of being wrapped in each other's arms on a cold November morning. Outside, the world gets colder with each passing day, succumbing to the chill of the approaching winter.

"Morning." He whispers, gently brushing a stray strand of hair away from her face, his voice still husky with sleep.

"Bonjour, mon amour." Alice responds, pulling him closer. She buries her face into his neck and shoulder, enjoying the familiar warmth and comfort he brings. His breath quickens as her kisses trail across his skin. Their foreheads meet and they gaze into each other's eyes, the world outside starting to fade away.

Their passion deepens with each passing second. Alice finds herself resting on top of him, her body pressed close, while Kylian's hands gently slide up and down her back, sending shivers of pleasure down her spine. The two slowly start moving, exploring each other's bodies, her hands caress his muscular chest, his powerful arms wrapped around her. She feels his arousal grow, sliding along the length of her slit, making her tremble.

Their lovemaking is slow and sweet, like honey dripping all over a warm piece of toast. Afterward, they lie together, reluctant to move, but eventually, the demands of the day call them back. With a shared sigh, they reluctantly kick off the covers and stretch out. The heated floor beneath them radiates warmth.

They go into the kitchen, still in their pajamas, and put on a pot of coffee. The aroma of coffee fills the air as Alice stands at the counter, slicing her favorite fruits. A persistent meowing echoes through the room and Alice looks down to find their curious feline friend, Renoir, rubbing against her leg, demanding attention. Kylian agrees to finish their breakfast as Alice gives attention to the kitten. Eventually she passes the time on her phone as she waits for the food to get ready.

When they’re eating, Kylian brings up something that has been bothering him. 

“I saw the pictures you just posted,” he mentions, his voice carrying a tinge of curiosity and concern. “Is this how you feel? Like Marie Antoinette?”

Alice has to pause so she doesn't choke on her food, she couldn't help but chuckle, her laughter dancing through the cozy kitchen. "I just like the photo, that's all.” But the levity was short-lived as a deeper realization hit her. "Well... maybe not in here, not in our home, but out there. I think I do feel like that sometimes. Like I'm just a pretty little thing who's not allowed to play the real game. Like I'm only here to entertain and do what I'm told." After their conversation the night before, Alice felt more inclined to open up to Kylian, to share her inner thoughts and vulnerabilities.

“I know what you mean, I feel like that sometimes, too.” Kylian says.

“You? You’re joking!” Alice scoffs in disbelief.

“I said sometimes.” He jokes, but then his expression turns serious. “Thinking that you’re not in control of your own life. I know the feeling. Entertain and do what you’re told, right? That’s what you said.” At that moment, Kylian also felt it was a good time to open up. “And sometimes – sometimes I feel like I have to please too many people, too many people count on me. Sometimes it can feel like my life became something out of my control, like I'm just a paw in someone else's game.”

“But that’s not true!” Alice is shocked he feels this way.

“No, it’s not. And it’s not true for you either.” He chuckles, thinking he made a good point.

A heavy silence hangs in the air, the only sound they can hear is Renoir as he enjoys his wet cat food.

“I want to be more, but I'm afraid this is all I can be.” Alice says, her fork tracing idle patterns on her plate.

"You’re afraid you've already peaked and it's all downhill from here. I know. I feel it too." Kylian replies, sharing her concerns.

“Kyky?”

“Yes?”

“I love you.”

It’s different this time, when she says that. After their conversation, they feel more connected than ever, and the ‘i love you’s’ have a deeper meaning.

[exoticalmonde]

Arknights Chapter XIII - The Whirlpool That Is Passion (Part I)

GOOD MORNING EVERYBODY AND I WISH ALL THOSE WHO WISH TO BE HOEDERER/VENDELA/VERDANT OWNERS TO BE HAVERS BECAUSE IT'S A WONDERFUL DAY AND I AM SO OVERDUE WITH WRITING THIS ACTUALLY!!!!

WARNING: This post is going to contain a lot of yapping from me about Hoederer and how much I love him and would also have a LOT of spoilers.

I am also a great yume-shipper, so my Dr. and Hoederer are married, that information should help with the weird comments sometimes.

Might make it different parts because all those SS will never fit even up to the part I am right now.

Perhaps first of all I need to mention how the pulling went? Apart from my day being catastrophically long and arduous, I managed to sneak some snacking in-between the one additional hour I had left after returning home.

I was actually shaking. Jittering out of my bones, near-heart attack type of activity was happening on my side of the screen while everybody else watched. I was supposed to take SS of every 10-pull but... I got ahead of myself. I think I had around 130 pulls, excluding the ones that I could buy from the ticket shop and the Originium that I blew for a skin.

I even kind of... Skipped my first Hoederer. The one below is the second one, that I ended my funds for, until I could buy the level 60 pack from the shop.

But we caught the third one.

And as it happens I was underprepared with money and XP cards, though I had all the materials for his skills. Bless the green tickets for allowing me to bulk-buy some of them actually since... My god farming for the RMA70-12 is tedious, fruitless and sad.

If I could get a penny for every single time this loser was being problematic I would have enough to buy them and never have problems again.

In any case, he could be immediately E1 lvl80d, and I have been grinding enough to get him to E2 on the same day. He's currently lvl60, cooking his M3 on S1 with Wishlash giving him a thumbs up every time he pulls out a whole boiled chicken to eat.

Starved Sarkaz, am I right?

Even his little token that you get when he joins you another time... I am actually crying, I love him so much and I am so happy he became playable.

Speaking of, did anybody know that the furniture set is separated into a couple other, smaller sets, or was I supposed to learn this from googling it myself?

Apparently, the whole set is called Mercenaries' Hideout, but the smaller sections of it are:

Writing Is Meaningless

Don't Ever Truly Rest

Secondhand Goods

Maintain Your Health

And I am sitting here, tears in my eyes reading their descriptions... When I first remembered that Chapter 13 was coming with a new set I almost screamed. Dr. Pinkie was making fun of me for calling this jail cell basically the same epithets you would use for a five-star hotel, but it really was close to my heart the way it mixed compact with DIY/'Hey, you'll never guess what I found on the street' kind of interior.

And because it is based around Hoederer, we are going to look through it first and read the descriptions before I actually descend into the story.

Description of the full set reads:

A recreation of a hideout in Kazdel, based on Hoederer's description and a number of additional details provided by Ines. As for anything not recreated from their recollections, it's best not to touch—Anything added by W might just blow up.

I love to imagine that these three have to share a dorm and the Doctor just goes up to Ines and Hoederer and asks if there is anything they can do to make it cosy or somehow homey. Also to think that both of them would have recollections of these 'hideouts' in Kazdel... Meanwhile, W seems like she's never been in those? My memory is kind of fuzzy about just how old the three are in comparison to each other.

Before/After Kazdel is pretty much like Before/After Eve was on the internet.

Basement Flooring:

Flooring that recreates the vibes of the basement where the mercenaries lived back in Kazdel. Ines sometimes muses that the place would be more suitable as a small shop. The two both ignored W's suggestion to sell potatoes there.

Basement Wallpaper:

Wallpaper that recreates the look of the basement where the mercenaries lived back in Kazdel. The gray walls look almost exactly the same as before. This time, when they look out the window, it is not the dust-covered Kazdel that they see.

'Our Current State'

A light tube is attached to a frame haphazardly welded together from multiple iron plates, letting out a warm glow despite its appearance. No matter how unstable it may seem, its light can carry the mercenaries through the dark night.

Somehow this little light contraption is 10000x better than any glaring white LED lightbulb that you could ever introduce to me these days.

Rust-colored Rug

A rug showing signs of age that look almost like rust. For some reason, this makes it blend in with the room's style. Is there a color that better reflects life in Kazdel? At least it's not blood-colored.

WHAT IF I JUST EXPLODE IN TEARS???!!!!????!!!!!

Writing Work Desk

A desk piled with books and documents. There are clear traces of manual craftsmanship. Few of the Sarkaz publications sitting on the desk are actually written in the Sarkaz language.

Hoederer's writing desk, I love him so much. The place he might be writing down the different things he wants to be telling to his class, because you KNOW I will absolutely be filing for sponsorship to get him those books and songs he might want to use. Pull in other Sarkaz on the ship to help. Not sure who I have who could be specifically from Kazdel times, but we will find them for you sweetie.

Intel Organizer

A must-have document pegboard for mercenaries, usually used to confirm target information and locations prior to missions. The photographs are always taken down whenever their owner returns. Yet sometimes, their owner never returns.

... I think I am actually going to die from sadness and we have not even started the chapter yet.

Storage Steel Pipe

A rack welded together from steel pipes and plates, normally used to hang clothes and hats. "How many times do I have to say this? Do not hang your work aprons here!"

I don't know who is speaking but the 'work apron' looks like it's Hoederer's and if I have to assume it's probably Ines who is scolding him about it. Little rebel, does it anyways.

Mercenaries' Bed

A flatbed trolley turned sofa bed. The fabric has frayed, but it is indeed soft and roomy. The broken wheel hubs ensure that it stays in place. For a very long time, this was the only place where the nights were not plagued by nightmares.

Imagine being on your trolley sofa-bed and suddenly RI begins moving because there is an emergency and your silly wheels go squeak-squeak towards the other end of the room at the same speed at which you were sitting still because everything else is moving but the bed is trying to stay at the same spot---

Me: "Do we know how fast RI moves?" Pinkie: "As fast as Czernobog can move towards Lungmen. It has to be fast enough to outrun a tornado." Me: "OH. Alright. Yeah, that makes sense."

"No Overloading"

Originally an exquisite wooden hanging lamp that lets out a warm glow. There are always knickknacks piled on top. It has a warning placed above: "No stacking!" Hoederer asked Ines, "Is this really something we can use?" Ines answered, "Yes."

IS THAT A PHOTO???? IS THAT??? WHAT ARE THEY???? Books???

Simple Study Ceiling Light

A part that the mercenaries removed from who-knows-what and hung from the ceiling. It started glowing, and not only is it very bright, it's also very hot. Ines asked Hoederer, "Is this really something we can use?" Hoederer answered, "Yes."

Hoederer, sweetie, I think if Ines gets to ask 'Can we use this safely?' then perhaps we might not have to use a random fire stick someone found somewhere.

Portable Stove

A stove that's portable, easy to assemble. What's on it likely belongs to a certain dangerous individual. Do not touch. "Oh, the paper in the stove? I ran out of fuel. By the way, Hoederer, you hungry? I cooked some potatoes over there."

YEAH? WITH HIS BOOKS, DIDNT YOU W???

"Versatility"

A bookshelf put together from multiple recycled materials. The lamp at the top was brought back by Ines. She said it was to make it easier to see shadows. The box at the foot of the shelf is full of historical studies.

Yeah, I too need a dowry chest full of books to feel satisfied.

Secondhand File Cabinet

A heavy steel file cabinet containing the historical data of each Sarkaz clan. Today, even the names of many of the clans documented within are indecipherable.

TO BE CONTINUED...

[darling-dont-scream]

J3rma is so pathetic but uniquely charismatic

To have Lvdwig, someone who’s young and arguably more successful than J, falling head over heels for compact lil ol’ him, it’s so…. Y’know ??

Someone who can get or achieve most things people could only dream of, trying his fucking best to get the one thing he can’t have , even employing him as chief creative officer (well deserved, I’m sure)

From investing in failing stock over one (1) conversation, thinking of him upon seeing a hamster make a weird noise, acting so excited at the mention of J at least shows the adoration L had for this compact lil’ man, it’s intriguing.

L hyped up J a lot more than I hype up my partner , really makes you think

J can ask him anything and L would say yes in a heartbeat, he’s fallen hard.

The same could be said in reverse as well

J’s humble nature would never accept that he’s better than L and looks up to him too (“I don’t even like Mario kart” “then why did you come??” “…Because I think you’re cool:)” “…thank you:)”)

It’s not hard to fall for someone as bright as L is it? He’s handsome, confident and more, able to bring J out to connect with more streamers n all

Close friend of J, St3r seems to be jealous of how J sees L,maybe just out of bitterness but it’d obvious enough to have S notice this, perhaps it’s because of how much J talks about L or the collabs they do

Regardless, I love this ship n the dynamic they share :)

[holly-mckenzie]

Hello! I love LOVE your blog it's so good. I always find the most interesting shows because of your posts so i wanted to ask what are your fav ships with the best chemistry in a newer film/tv show? I saw a whole debate a few days ago about how "ships nowadays are always lacking chemistry " and i was interested in your opinion. Have a nice day!

Hello anon... I need to clarify, I wrote this answer essay thinking about romcoms, bc that's what film twitter has been talking about, but I realised you said "ships". I will answer your question here. Under the cut, is my thoughts on romcoms, please be aware what is hiding beneath the cut is a behemoth of an answer.

But in terms of "ships" and lacking chemistry. I think there's a few things to think about. Specifically, I believe there has been way to much focus on "ships" and sometimes this conversation detracts from other elements of storytelling, or completely takes over the entire story and what it makes it interesting (e.g. - the conversation surrounding Anatomy of a Fall or what Reylo did to Star Wars). On the subject of Star Wars, one of the things to think about in this conversation is how racism, misogyny, or general bigotry shape peoples opinions. The argument of "they don't have chemistry" is a common phrase used by racists and bigots who don't want to engage with their faves being involved with characters of colour/woman etc.

Now unto other reasons why "ships" might not have chemistry. I think if you are discussing American Television, one thing to note is the departure of shows that had 20+ episodes. With the fear that the show might get cancelled and with a shorter time to establish the narrative, I think we, as audiences, are seeing less of the long con, "will they, won't they" game, that we saw in the late 90's/2000's. I would argue this could be one of the reasons that British TV does so well, most British series are only 6 episodes long, and there may be a better understanding of how to write a more compact narrative, and perhaps there's even better job security... But maybe not considering Joe Barton's history.

Lastly, there is a world of media out there and you need to make the effort to find and engage with it. I talk more about this under the cut, but so many people who are minorities are not given the same advantages as white straight people... So if you want to find good stuff. You gots to look for it. It might not be in a language you understand, or about people who you can relate to, but its out there. Go find it.

So in Answer to your Question, what are my fav ships with the best chemistry in a newer film/tv show.

Television: Starstruck (2021– ) : Tom x Jessie The Lazarus Project (2022– ) : Janet x Rebrov & Zhao x Archie & Shiv x George The Artful Dodger (2023) : Belle x Jack Foundation (2021– ) : Hober Mallow x Brother Constant Alex Rider (2020– ) : Alex x Kyra Animal Control (2023– ) : Shred x Emily Tom Jones (2023) : Tom x Sophia

Other Honourable Mentions: Summer Love (2022– ), Colin from Accounts (2022), Still Up (2023– ), Little Woman (2022), Lockwood and Co. (2023), The Flatshare (2022), The Other Two, Suzhal (2022), In Limbo (2023– ), The Buccaneers (2023– ).

Films: Femme (2023), Here (2023), Decision to Leave (2022), Stay the Night (2022), The Big Four (2022), Ponniyan Selvan i & ii, Stellar (2022), Wildhood (2022), Lakelands (2023), Wedding Season (2022), 7 Days (2021), Scream VI, Sanctuary (2022)

Books: Anything by Tia Williams, Sarah Beth Durst, Uzma Jalaluddin, Jane Igharo

Stage: The Effect (2023/2024), Much Ado About Nothing (2019), Much Ado About Nothing (2022), The Notebook (2024), Hadestown

My Original Answer:

Hello anon, thank you so much! Thanks for appreciating my questionable taste. I do really enjoy watching TV, film, and books and then writing academic papers about them in my head. So obviously this question is really fun.

I need to start by saying, I have been thinking about chemistry for weeks, so I am going to answer your question, just maybe not the question you were asking. Brace yourselves, I wrote an essay.

The whole debate is deeply fascinating to me for various reasons. In part I do really believe that people need to broaden their horizons when it comes to the art they interact with. There is a world of cinema out there. If you surround yourselves by clowns and then complain you are in a circus... that's a choice, no?

Expand your horizons, dip into Asian cinema, African cinema, American Cinema (North, South, and Central), that European stuff (that isn't just what the BBC is pumping out or starring your French favs). And if you must watch Hollywood, then watch some indie stuff. Watch some gay stuff. Watch some stuff by people of colour.

Lichrelly no one is forcing you to watch the blandest/whitest romcoms/romdrams. Are they more accessible to watch? Sure. But complaining, when you don't even care to do the research is a choice. Especially, bc of the way that racism/misogyny/homophobia/ableism makes it harder for people to get their stories out. If you really care about these things. You gots to put the effort into caring and finding them.

Secondly, boiling down chemistry to romance is absolutely wild, considering there are different type of chemistry needed for different roles. For example Rob Collins and Shantae Barnes-Cowan have mad chemistry in the show Firebite. Now let me clarify, I am not saying its romantic. They pulled off the single dad and adopted daughter in a survival/action story story so well. Pedro Pascal, who? And it takes chemistry to pull that off. More popularly, one of the reasons that Succession works as a show is because the actors have chemistry. Some of which is romantic ofc, but the vast majority of it isn't (no matter what the in*est shippers on A*3 say). But I understand, the people want what they want, and that's romance.

I also think that chemistry is an odd thing. I know people are inclined to think that its an objective. You look at two people and are like, "Wow, they have chemistry!", and everyone agrees, because "Wow, they have chemistry!". But I am inclined to think its not that straight forward. There is something to be said about our interactions with art being subjective and biased. This is because as we interact with art, we are interacting with it through our own lens. The author is truly dead, and all that matters is the individual reader's interpretation. So, for example, many people love the movie Anyone But You. If you go on YouTube there are many people who have made ship videos about Bea and Ben. But there is a category of people who fucking hate it and think that its trash and the leads don't have chemistry (Yes, I am talking about myself in third person. I will avenge you Much Ado About Nothing).

So, who is right? Who is wrong? Honestly, it really doesn't matter, because its a fucking movie, and like I said, the author is dead. Similarly, some critics really didn't like the series Tom Jones. In certain reviews and articles, criticism of the series was that Solly McLead and Sophie Wilde don't have chemistry. However, if you follow me, you know I completely disagree and made that show my personality for a couple of months.

But on the subject of chemistry (of the romantic variety), I definitely think its more complicated then people let on. I think most people believe that it's about the actors. You put them in a movie, show, whatever, and chemistry they have just happens. It's like love, you can't explain it, but its there. Or, according to my friend, who used to work in the film industry, the best chemistry comes across when the actors hate each other or they secretly like each other/are fucking each other. It's brought on by strong emotions. Which is obviously a school of thought.

However, as my bestie Merry (@akajustmerry) has been discussing, there are actors who are dating/fucking IRL and none of that comes across in the film/show. I highly recommend checking out Merry's blog to see their opinions on this bc Merry is THE film critic of our generation! Someone please hire them!

But I do think it takes more than just what the actors can bring. It's about the direction they are being given, its about the script, its about the staging. It's about the framing. And it's about the actors and their acting ability. Actors are working professionals and contrary to popular belief, it takes skills to act (not just a pretty face). And one of the skills needed is the ability to create trust between the leads, as Merry and an anon discusses in this post. Because without trust, how can there be chemistry. Which is why intimacy coordinators are SO important. Fuck anyone who says otherwise!

To argue against my friend who used to work in the industry, yes hating/loving someone IRL can create tangible chemistry. And yeah, it might be hard to overcome friendship, if you are friends with your co-star (e.g. - that one interview where Jessica Matten jokes about how weird it was to kiss Kiowa Gordan in Dark Winds). But think about Nikesh Patel and Rose Matafeo in Starstruck. From what I can tell, which is little bc I don't know them IRL and its none of my business, Rose and Nikesh weren't hating each other or fucking in each other. They seem to be friends, but mostly co-workers. But regardless of all of that, Starstruck is literally one of the greatest romcoms of our era. And they have mad chemistry.

Additionally, in my opinion, Lee Pace and Laura Birn of Foundation fame, and Lana Gordon and MPQ/Zachary James and Gloria Onitiri of Hadestown fame have chemistry. But all the men I just listed are gay/in relationship with men, so we can't chalk up chemistry to already existing romantic tension. It is an aspect of acting and skill. Both Zachary James and MPQ have spoken about how the trust they have in their co-stars, have allowed space to shape and cultivate the characters they play (including the romance of the show).

You can't just cast two conventionally attractive people and expect their attractiveness to do the rest. You know my thoughts on Anyone But You. But similarly, think about the way that people were thirsting over Zoë Kravitz and Robert Pattinson bc of all the press and photo shoots they did for The Batman. But then also think of the accusations of whorebaiting, that followed. They simply, in my opinion, did not have chemistry. Even if the Bat and the Cat are one of the funnest dynamics in them comics.

So now that we have discussed actors, and audiences. We gots to discuss actual story telling. Writing is a skill. I know on the tumblr dot com, we have discussed that writing good sex scenes is a skill. Writing good romance is the same... I don't want to labour on about this, bc I feel like you must already know that. But some things to consider is the way in which the focus on tropes instead of storytelling is a detriment to the genre. The fanfictionization of romance. The way in which abuse is touted as romance. The way that studios (coughcough Netflix) are churning out these stories (some of which are def US military propaganda). The lean towards making these movies, more and more explicit. The way that some studios/book publishers are trying to profit off already successful stories without realising what made it successful (e.g. - the amount of fake dating stories in the wake of To All the Boys, or the remakes of older movies).

So what made the movies of old so special. What made romcoms from the late 90's early 2000's, the movies by Nora Ephron and Garry Marshall oh so special. The bleak answer is nostalgia. But you could also discuss the type of narratives that were told during the time. The type of backgrounds these actors and storytellers had before they took these roles. The socio-political enviroment that cultivated these stories. The amount of money and time the studios were willing to invest in these movies. The lack of AI technology... All of the cheating scandals that arose on the sets. The existence of the Film Stars™ vs. just actors.

The fact that streaming has changed the way that movies/tv are made, and the way people consume them. Which could potentially lesson the impact on audiences, as there is less need to go to theatres. To wait for the movies to be released on DVD/VCD/VHS. Lessen the need to re-watch the movies obsessively, bc it was one of three movies you owned on DVD/VCD/VHS, and thus a lack of cementing it in your brain as THE RomCom. Yes, this is just an excuse to yell: BRING BACK PHYSICAL MEDIA, YOU COWARDS!

But one thing that I haven't seen discussed as much is the existence of the Hays Code.

A couple years ago, I watched this lecture and read this book by this academic that focused on RomComs. (I forgot the academic, but I can find it later, if you want. Can you tell I studied English and Film in school?). Regardless, the academic argued that during the 90's filmmakers had to grapple with the remnants of the Hays Code. The code was a "self-imposed industry set of guidelines for all the motion pictures that were released between 1934 and 1968." The Code prohibited things like "profanity, suggestive nudity, graphic or realistic violence, sexual persuasions and rape."

So, while RomComs, like Pretty Woman, were in production, more then 20 years after the Hays Code, this academic argued that filmmakers were grappling with what this freedom meant. That while Pretty Woman was definitely a movie that could have never been made during the time of the Code, the affect of the Code meant that these narratives were adhering to the Code, whether intentional or not.

I think one of the things to consider about the Code was the way that filmmakers had to figure out ways to work around the restrictions in order to tell the stories they wanted. So, for example the Noir is a genre came about during the height of the Code and a time where film-makers didn't have access to that much money. So, the filmmakers had to be creative to get the shots they wanted, which is how we got the highly stylized way of filming that is so iconic to the genre. Not out of excess but out of need. Additionally, the iconic archetypes of the Noir Detective and the Femme Fatale are directly due to the Hayes Code and the period that villanized certain types of woman, and esteemed certain types of men.

Yet, there is an entire study on the homosexual subtext, which was written into these films. For example in The Maltese Falcon, the main character, Sam Spade, refers to another character as a "gunsel". The the censors wrongly assumed this was a reference to a gunman, however, it is vulgar way to refer to someone who is gay. This is the same movie that features a different character, Joel Cairo, who is suggested to be gay (which is one of the reasons the film could not be legally shown on US television stations). Being a filmmaker meant learning how to navigate around the code. Being a filmmaker meant taking a risk, bc you may end up on wrong side of it.

If you want more information on queer films of the time, I believe that Merry or Deah would be able to help you seeing they have an entire podcast on gay movies/shows/games. Check out the @gayvclubpodcast.

So, going back to the RomComs of the 90's. You are talking about an entire industry of filmmakers, who were making movies after the wake of an extreme censorship, and on some level they must known or have heard stories about navigating that terrain. They must have also, on some level, understood what it meant to cultivate stories where characters want each other, like each other, yearn for each other. Because during the Code you couldn't just point a camera at them and say "See they are fucking each other, they did fuck each other, they will continue to do so. Clearly this is a romance". More work needed to be done and laid out in order to cultivate the romances that we now love.

I would argue, if you want to buy this argument, that this is the same reason that K-Dramas/Movies are SO popular. Because it was not that long ago, that Korea was more strict about the way in which physical intimacy was filmed. Think about the era, where actors would stand next to each other, lips touching, and the camera would spin in a dizzying way around them. Now, obviously, kisses aren't filmed in that way, and some movies feature open mouth kisses. Scandalous, I know. But I would argue this is one of the reasons that K-Dramas are so famous, because of the knowledge on how to draw out emotions from the audience that does not rely on physical/sexual intimacy.

So, I suppose the conversation of "ships nowadays are always lacking chemistry " comes down to a skill issue. Skill on the filmmakers parts for not being able to cultivate good stories. Skill on the Actors part, for not being able to do what is required of the role. Skill of the studios parts, for not realising the long term impact of physical media and what sells. And skill on the audiences part, for not seeing the world in one way, and not caring to do the research to find the stories you are looking for.

[mister-e-muss]

Backlog report time: How did February ‘24 treat me?

Turns out this was a bit of a light month for me.

AI: The Somnium Files

I blame a fun demo, a very generous eShop sale, and my mutual @sakuracat96 for getting me into this one. I don’t really play visual novels. Ever. To my mind the only exceptions to this are the Ace Attorney games, 13 Sentinels, and now this game, and that’s because there is actual gameplay attached to the story.

If there’s one thing about the game that I can say it’s that it is fundamentally weird. It’s concept is about entering people’s dreams, and trying entirely off-the-wall solutions to progress. Even outside of the dreams, there’s a careful balance of humor and grit.

I loved this game. I feel almost bad for stealing this game for 8 dollars. While I’ve heard that it’s sequel is a mixed bag, I can’t wait to see where this series goes.

Chrono Trigger (DS)

Honestly what can I even say about this one. It’s goddamn Chrono Trigger! We’re talking about one of the original ‘best game of all time’ best games of all time! This is one of the founding fathers of JRPG greatness: a game that compares unfavorably with, depending on who you ask, maybe two other games! There is literally nothing I can say about this game that hasn’t been said at least three times before.

For being almost 30 years old, it is incredible how well this game holds up. Combat isn’t as large or complex as more modern entries in the genre, but it’s effective and fun. The soundtrack is just as good then as it is now. The story is involved, with reveals and new characters coming at just the right pace to keep you hooked.

I genuinely think that this game has not aged in the slightest. That isn’t to say there aren’t games that do certain things better, but it is great as a total package. Do I think that Magus and Frog are deeper characters than say Renne Hayworth/Bright? No not really. Do I think the soundtrack is better than The World Ends With You? No. Does it have a long runtime wherein every nook and cranny is packed with content? Again, no. In fact the DS versions’ extra content is just plain tedious, and feels like padding.

But I think its short run-time is an under-appropriated aspect. I play Xenoblade and Trails, so you know that I love long-running games. Especially when they use that time to really dig into the world and characters and how things work. That said, a long run time is not necessarily a good thing. If you’re gameplay loop isn’t fun or is just tedious, then long run times just extend the discomfort. If there’s one thing that I’ve learned in English, it’s that bigger is not better. It’s not a writer’s job to bend the dictionary over their knee, or break a thesaurus’ spine, or demand the reader suddenly memorize an entire Glossary’s worth of terminology to make a book make sense. A writer’s job, in plain and simple terms, is to tell the story as best they can. This is Chrono Trigger’s hidden strength: it’s compact and succinct. Frog might not be as fully realized a character compared to others, but there’s enough of an arc to make the player feel for him. The story might be comparatively short, (my run clocked in at 28 hours, and I spent two of those doing that annoying bonus content I mentioned) but it does so much within that time.

I genuinely feel like Square Enix could release a remake or port in every console generation, and it would still stake up. In fact, I have no idea why Square isn’t using their HD2D engine on this one.

[utterlyinevitable]

(Further) Trials & Tribulations (3/?)

↳ series masterlist

Friends helping friends

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Becca Lao) feat. Bryce Lahela Rating: Teen+ Warnings: mentions of depression Tropes: Bryce- Domestic; 

Summary: Bryce helps Becca clean her room. Then he encourages her to hook up with a stranger Tobias.

a/n: bryce and becca are best friends! 

________________

Bryce and Becca were near inseparable. She was thankful for his company and he was thankful for the color back on her freckled cheeks. 

One day on their mutual day off Bryce invited himself over to hang out. Becca told him she wasn’t doing anything fun and he took that as a challenge to make whatever she had planned enjoyable. He helped her clean and organize her room. 

What Bryce wasn’t privy to was that her sheets had been left dirty since that night. His smell on the abandoned pillows she hid in the back stopped lingering and Becca took it as a sign. She decided to swap her clothes around to coincide with the season, reorganize every drawer and surface, and bin anything and everything that doesn’t spark joy. 

According to Bryce, Becca doesn’t fold her clothes right - the two of them bickering the whole afternoon. 

“What are you doing?” she asks from across the room, watching him sit on the floor with her entire underwear drawer piled around him. Bryce’s arms deep in the drawer pulling piece after stuffed-in piece from behind. “No no no! You don’t need to!” She scurries and dives towards him, trying to pry the skimpy material from his grasp.  

He dodges, but drops the material, moving his attention to the panties at the top of the pile. “You don’t fold your underwear?” he asks, beginning to fold a pair of panties.  

“What sociopath folds their underwear?”

“Someone with limited space and a hell of a lot of clothes,” he playfully chides. 

“It's fiiiine,” she says. 

“It's not. You invited me over to organize your room and that's exactly what I'm gonna do.” He pushes her off and away so he could get unimpeded access to the designated drawer. 

“You invited yourself over.” 

“Aren't you lucky I graced you with my premier skills. You need all the help you can get. You have so much stuff. Becks, you are a hot mess.” 

“Bryce it’s fine they fit in the drawer as they are.” 

“Next you'll tell me you don't konmari!” 

She gave him a blank stare. He shot up to check the rest of the drawers of her dresser. 

“Ahhh. How do you find anything!?” Bryce was absolutely aghast. 

“I don't, that's why we're cleaning!” 

“Woman, you need me.” Bryce began dumping every contents of each dresser drawer onto the floor, much to Becca’s horror. “Watch and learn.” 

He took a pair of jeans and folded them into a square.

“I never would've thought go-with-the-flow party boy Bryce would have critical OCD.”

“A happy home is a happy life. When everything’s in the right place I don't have to worry about it. I can focus on more important things like my friends or-”

She happily cut him off. “Your hair.” 

“Same rules apply. Put out what you wanna get back in the world. We're gonna whip your room into shape and you'll be set free in no time!” 

Oh what a weighted statement that was. 

Bryce and Becca spent the better part of the daylight hours putting her room into a functional state, with the former redoing everything she did and walking her through the uses built in. The clothes that needed to be hung, were, and organized by sleeve length and color. The trousers and jeans were folded into compact rectangles, and the underwear sectioned off so that the socks didn’t mix in with the panties and the bras and so on.  

“Now that you’re rooms done, get dressed,” Bryce ordered, chucking a dress onto the bed. 

“Why?” 

“We’re going out to celebrate.”  

“Bryce, I’m tired.” Becca flopped onto the bed. “Let me enjoy the cleanly peace!” 

“Nope.” He tugged her ankles, “Lets go.” 

Donahue’s didn’t look any different. The woman at Bryce’s side did. She got all dressed up just as Bryce suggested - a dress with subtle make up to enhance her features. She looked dressed to kill, and happy too! Just like she used to look. Tonight was an absolute win in Bryce’s books on the build-a-Becks-back-up mission. 

They were having drinks at the bar, having banter with Reggie and sampling a flight of new cocktails, when Bryce leaned over to whisper in her ear.

“Hey, that guy looks familiar.” He nodded down to the end of the bar, towards that one harrowing stool she tries not to think too much about. “He’s totally checking you out.”

“Bryce…” she warns. 

“You’re hot. He’s hot. C’mon Becks when was the last time you let loose?” he nudges her shoulder a couple times. 

Becca just rolled her eyes and indulged herself in her drink.  

They carried on chatting and gossiping until Bryce stalked off with a devious smirk. He found a group of surgical residents across the bar he just needed to speak with. It was a guise, they both knew it. Becca just hoped the guy at the other end of the bar top wouldn’t leap at the opportunity. 

Alas... Bryce kept a knowing eye on Becca and her mysterious olive-skinned stranger.  

“I know you,” the man says. 

“Is that so?” Becca turned slightly on the stool to face him.  

“Tobias.” he extended his hand. “I believe we met at KoKo a few days back.” 

If she wasn’t two-drinks in she’d be embarrassed at how Tobias could read recognition dawning over her. As she recalled the man she kissed in the club. 

“Caroline.” 

She knew this was not a man she wanted to be involved with or see again. So she gave her alias, a derivative of her middle name. 

“Pleasure,” he smiled, making a motion towards the empty stool besides her, “Where’s your friend?” 

Becca pointed over to the dart board where he was joking with some other surgical interns. 

“Surgeons...” he drawls. “Not a brain cell between them.”

Becca let out a slight chuckle before returning her gin and tonic to her lips. 

“You’re a doctor?” she says more than asks.  

“I am; over at Mass Kenmore.” 

“What brings you to Edenbrook’s side of town?” 

“Would you believe me if I said the company?” 

“No.” 

They talked, conversation flowing as freely as the drinks, intention hanging on their every word. 

Becca knew she shouldn’t indulge another endeavor with the handsome stranger. It was a disaster waiting to happen. God, she hated the way this man smiled - like he was a python devouring her whole. But in the dim light of Donahue’s, Bryce’s encouraging winks and nods from a few stools down, and the free drinks pouring, maybe a dance with the devil was exactly what she needed. A bit of mind numbing sex never hurt anybody, right?

No;

This wouldn’t hurt Becca, or him, but in time it would hurt Ethan.

‘Caroline’ downed her drink and gave Reggie the signal for another shot. 

“One condition,” she says. 

His eyebrow raises and he leans in, closer, “Enlighten me.” 

“This never happens again.”  

His smile grew like the Cheshire Cat, “Challenge accepted.” 

Tobias and she clinked glasses as she weighed her options one final time. There’s the bar bathroom, dirty and sticky and something straight out of a horror film. Or they could go back to his place. An intimate look into how the Mass Kenmore Diagnostician lives. Too intimate.

Then Becca slinked off her stool and made her way to the bathroom, Tobias not too far behind. 

___________________

a/n: this is obviously an ethan x becca endgame fic. just with a sprinkling of love for bryce and what should have been. 

@choicesficwriterscreations​ @openheartfanfics​

> complete masterlist <

Perma:

@jerzwriter   @quixoticdreamer16   @terrm9 @crazy-loca-blog   @the-pale-goddess   @schnitzelbutterfingers   @gryffindordaughterofathena   @lucy-268   @reputaytion-xiii @peonierose   @withbeautyandrage @little-flowers-on-heaven @parisa-kh   @forallthatitsworth   @maurine07 @cariantha  @starrystarrytrouble @mvalentine

All Ethan:

@queencarb   @lsvdw-blog   @mm2305   @senseofduties  @differenttyphoonwerewolf   @a-crepusculo @shreyasrivathsa    @headoverheelsforramsey   @blossomanarchy   @rosebudde  @coffeeheartaddict2 @cryomyst @rookiemartin   @ohchoices   @takemyopenheart @uneravine @ofmischiefandmedicine

Bryce:

@weaving-in-words  

[kiwikipedia]

Can I know more about Arvid? I saw him mentioned in @kit-fisto-obsessive ‘s fic and you talk about him some on here but I haven’t seen much of him on your own AO3

GLADLY

I have a couple posts on Arvid here but I don't think I've really put much on AO3 at all of him. I think he only appears in passing mentions such as in dual wield where he's mentioned by Cin.

Anywhooo~

I did an introduction post here with his old design and a new design and some alters here but I can go over it again ehehe

Basically:

Arvid Carin is best mates with Jaro Tapal and the partner of Dex Jettster. He's also an Artisan Jedi Master as the current head of the Woodworking Department of the Division and has trained one padawan, the current Second Hand of the Department— Turu.

He's from another one of my fan-made races, a dragon species that has branching roots in the Fae and Spirits. While there are a few of them across the Galaxy, but he's specifically an Inferno Drakon hailing from the volcanic planet Surlogi.

Like all Inferno Drakon who have chosen to assume a more humanoid appearance and leave Surlogi, Arvid has a number of forms that he can assume.

His true form is a massive, wingless dragon with the full length being about half as long as the temple is wide.

His main form is about 6'9" standing upright without his horns, though he slouches a lot. This is what most people see him as, and while his legs are still humanoid, his feet are definitely still that same clawed dragon look.

His combat form is a bit more draconic, his legs change to be more dragon-like and his hands become more clawed with more scales appearing under and through his skin. he's about 7'10 at that height when fully upright

His "compact" form or resting form is either after a fight or when conditions are met that require him to condense into an almost fully human form just to keep from exploding outwards into his true form. He's about 5'10 - 6' tall in that form but is much hotter to the touch than the other two humanoid forms. Almost scalding.

Save for the last one, Arvid retains his horns and tail in his human forms and has a very high body temperature

Personality wise he's known as a quiet, tired, and reserved individual to pretty much everyone and while true, he is also incredibly kind and compassionate.

His tiredness stems from his inability to find a good way to sleep with horns and a tail along with having just a general insomnia. He spends his waking hours working and often avoids people if possible while he does so he doesn’t lose focus. He enjoys listening to people talk though, so if he’s sought out while working for conversation it’s very one sided but he’s paying attention

While he enjoys children and doesn't mind them clinging to him for warmth, he states he'd be a very bad Master now days, to which Turu assures him that he was a fine Master when They were learning under him. Arvid also states he'd be a bad parent, though it is noted that he makes a decent father figure to Dex's adoptive daughter Onyx.

ofc despite all of this, Arvid is still a dragon and he does have a rather dangerous temper when it gets to that point. Basically:

Arvid Cairn was slow to anger, just like the magma flows his kind were borne from. Slow to anger, yet extremely dangerous when he did.

A forgotten fact to some.

The cracking of bones under his grip was something that wasn’t quite foreign to him— but it had been a long time. Been a long time since he had felt this angry.

I have some other little bits of triva, but these are the big parts.

Theres a lot of describing points that follow fire/volcano analogies lol

[electrasev5nwrites]

Ninja Daily: Vapors 47

It took conscious effort to pick her jaw back up.

"Say that again?" Aiko asked a bit weakly.

He glared, looking spectacularly uncomfortable, as if he was possibly considering pulling a Sasuke and fleeing the conversation. But Kakashi-shishou gave a pouty little huff and repeated himself. "I re-evaluated my previous rhetorical position. I have an alternative for the Rasengan."

Perhaps there just weren't any logs nearby to substitute with. Aiko resisted the temptation to check.

'If I'm not mistaken, that's a wordy apology.' She smoothed her features and did her best not to look too surprised. There would be no point to insulting him or making him feel any more uncomfortable by seeming too exuberantly grateful. Aiko didn't like these sorts of conversations either, so she directed her reply to the ground and scuffed the toes of her sandal in the dirt, tracing lines. "I misspoke as well," she muttered. "I was taking other frustrations out on you. I don't want to be arguing anymore."

"Well, that's settled then." One of those ludicrous fake eye-smiles diffused the tension, and Kakashi shifted into business mode with a palpable air of relief. "Before I teach you, I have one warning. I based this off of my experience making chidori, so don't go sharing insights about it to anyone else. It's a bit of a cheat sheet for reverse engineering my technique."

She blanched. 'He invented a technique for me? Holy shit,' Aiko thought weakly. That was a hell of an apology. 'I should probably master it and be damn grateful. I'm definitely not going to mention being okay with the Rasengan after all.'

"The name's a little deceptive, but I rather like it. Sen Tsurara—one thousand icicles. I initially tried to use the same shape transformation as for my chidori, but it ended up much less compact, but without the long tendrils of excess energy that characterize chidori. If you haven't noticed by now, chidori uses Ox, Rabbit, and then Monkey."

He demonstrated without channeling chakra, which was a damn sight harder than it sounded. "I couldn't get what I wanted to work with three handsigns—the minimum appears to be four." He paused. "Well, at least until you've mastered it to the point where it comes naturally. Have you ever used Jin?"

Aiko shook her head. He just lazily blinked as if he expected that. At least, it seemed like he blinked, even though she couldn't see both eyes. She had to assume he wasn't really winking at her all the time.

"Alright. Jin is commonly associated with water release techniques." He demonstrated slowly and carefully. When Aiko mimicked it, he moved on. "It starts the same, but you're going to lose the Rabbit seal entirely and substitute in 'Dog' and then 'Jin', but still end with Monkey. Show me."

Aiko entirely blocked the chakra paths in her wrists and flashed through the sequence, not fumbling on the new seal.

"Good." Kakashi let a hand wander up to that electrocuted mop he called hair, a gesture she recognized as meaning he was thinking. "Alright. Obviously, there's no ice involved in this technique. I can do many things, but I haven't figured out how to transfer bloodline limits yet."

It took conscious effort not to look at the hidden Sharingan eye under his dark blue mask.

"Instead of ice, you'll actually be generating water and using the same concentration you do to give water bullets their hard edge." He shrugged lazily. "It looks a lot like ice, and that sounds better than 'One thousand pointy bits of water.' Then he looked contemplative for a moment, before putting his palms up and sheepishly admitting, "And it's actually more like six hundred seventy six pointy bits, but who's counting?" His visible eye curved into a smile.

She was a little appalled that he'd actually been anal enough to count them himself (and how had he even managed that?), but agreed that no one else was likely to spot the fib in the name.

"Is… is it a running technique like chidori?" she asked, curious.

He shook his head. "No, that's dangerous. Not that this doesn't have its own problems," he admitted self-depreciatingly. "It's not a sustained technique. It only lasts about a second and a half at most. So if your timing is off, you're just pawing at people with your bare hand."

"And that doesn't work for anyone but a Hyuuga," she finished.

His lip seemed to twitch under his mask. "Correct." Then he demonstrated, flipping through the seals at a speed she couldn't even register, since she already knew what they would be.

Of course, nothing seemed to happen for a good second. She furrowed her brow and looked up at his face, which seemed decidedly amused. "As you can see, nothing happens until you force a burst of chakra out past the buildup," he drawled. "The seals are just preparation in this case. You can ready them as much as a few seconds before you actually use the technique, which does mitigate something of the timing problem." He ran through the hand seals again, this time lifting up his right hand and pulsing chakra through it.

It exploded—it really did look like ice burst out of his hand. In the moments it lasted, he lazily demonstrated that it wasn't bound to a single trajectory by moving his arm from side to side, letting the technique move with him. Then suddenly it dissolved, collapsing into a sphere of water and then splashing to the ground, all form lost.

"Whoa." She took a deep breath, mind working. "There's something I didn't see, isn't there? If it had just been that hard-edge technique, it would have shredded your hand as well."

He looked a bit proud. "Insightful. Yes, the first step is a soft cushion around your hand." He kneeled to scoop up the fallen water and demonstrated a wiggly glove construct, instead of generating more raw material. "You're going to attach the hard edge to that, instead of your flesh."

She made a face. That sounded like a pain. He hadn't actually taught her a technique that complicated before. He made it look easy, but the control for that cushion was analogous to what beginning medics would need. She would be able to do it while working on another technique, but barely and only with a fair bit of concentration.

'That means more chakra control practice, so I can use this on-the-go,' she sighed. Goddamnit.

Kakashi chuckled lowly, not sounding particularly amused. "It would be embarrassing to cripple yourself with your own technique. So, don't forget that part. The difficult bit is manifesting that independently of what you're doing with the handseals for the hard-edge portion, but the closer they are together time-wise, the less likely that the people you are about to skewer have a chance to figure out the possible weakness that you can be harmed by your own technique."

He didn't have to explain why that would be a bad thing.

"Duly noted." Aiko fidgeted.

"Show me that part first," he lazily demanded, leaning back against a tree. "I know you can do it, but I'd like to see it actually generated and not picked up from a natural source."

For a while, he just let her work in silence, occasionally giving a tip or snarky critique. She had managed to start attaching hard edges to the protective cushion, even though they were messy and nothing like shishou's perfect, symmetrical jagged protrusions by the time he brought up a strange topic.

"I didn't realize you and Naruto were living on your own from such a young age. Four, wasn't it?"

'Why's he bringing that up now?'

Aiko frowned, stealing a glance at her sensei. The tone had been perfectly level and casual, but something had been very wrong about the statement nonetheless, and not just the fact that he rarely initiated idle conversation. Perhaps it had been the way he emphasized syllables or the fact that he was trying too hard to sound nonchalant.

Either way, it seemed like a dangerous question to respond to. Kakashi was fishing for information or a certain response. Saying something when she didn't know what he was looking for could end poorly. Aiko didn't intend for anyone to ever find out that she had been reincarnated or had precognition or whatever the hell was going on in her head. She barely trusted in her own sanity, and she was the one stuck in her head. Doubtless, no one else would just accept such a crazy claim. It was better to let people attribute the fact that she didn't always entirely 'click' to whatever they wanted. Often, people told themselves far better lies than anyone else could.

So Aiko shrugged noncommittally, focusing on her task and how the goddamn icicle things just wouldn't manifest the long, straight edges that Kakashi's technique had instead of responding verbally. Her shishou seemed to measure the response, tilting his head slightly like a bird. If she knew him at all, which she definitely did, now he would be re-thinking his rhetorical approach and coming at whatever he wanted to know from another angle. She would probably be able to figure out what he was really angling for by considering his first question in conjunction with whatever he tried next.

"Why do you act as though you're so much older than your brother?" Kakashi asked suddenly.

Aiko blinked, taken aback by the odd question. He didn't suspect that she was really an adult—that wasn't a suspicion you gently prodded at, so she didn't see the connection. "I don't know. I just suppose that someone had to take care of things, and I was more qualified."

'Because I was born fully conscious and aware,' her mind filled in. Was it lying if she finished her sentences in her head?

Her shishou seemed to frown, eye darkening. "You shouldn't have had to."

'Oh. That's what this is about. He's feeling guilty now that he realizes no one stepped up to take care of us after Minato and Kushina died.'

The realization was surprisingly irritating. Aiko rolled her eyes, exasperated. He'd been fourteen and just lost the last of his support system—of course he hadn't been able to take the twins in, even if he had been able to afford and care for two infants.

"Who cares what I 'shouldn't have had' to do? It's a bit late now, and obviously it worked out. Look at how well adjusted I am." She held her hands out in demonstration, and momentarily regretted that Yamato wasn't there. That joke would have garnered at least a snort.

"Tough crowd," she muttered at Kakashi's unamused expression. Aiko shrugged, turning away and stubbornly avoiding his eye, pretending to be engrossed in hand seals. "Look, I don't know what you want me to say. I don't regret it. I like being an adult."

Kakashi just looked tired and depressed, slumping his shoulders inward."But you weren't. Minato was my sensei. I should have-"

"Bullshit." The fingers of her right hand, which had been trying to flash through the handsigns she'd just been taught, clenched convulsively. Her neck was so stiff that it hurt a little. "I doubt you were in any state to take in two infants. Besides, I can't imagine thinking of you as a father figure." He recoiled, but she didn't feel guilty. "You're my mentor and probably my best friend." The touchy-feely admission was a little embarrassing, so she closed her eyes entirely. "It's between you and Naruto, and I just don't think he has the appropriate sass for the role."

He snorted. But he didn't say anything else, be it a refutation or a continuation of his pity party, so she counted it as a victory.

It was surprisingly easy to fall back into their old patterns of behavior, which would have been nice if Aiko hadn't been attempting to alter her own actions. She was probably too old to cling off of him now, and it would only encourage her silly infatuation. So she maintained a little more distance than she would have only three months ago, but he didn't comment.

They only stayed in the training field for another hour. She wasn't exactly a novice with solid chakra manifestations, but this one ate a shocking amount of her chakra. As she worked she was becoming a little more efficient, which was reassuring, but she wouldn't be whipping this one out in combat any time too soon. It wasn't the jutsu itself that was the issue. Nor was it that her reserves were low. It was her inexperience with maintaining multiple shapes at once, which only practice could rectify.

Aiko wasn't worried. If shishou thought she could master this, then she could. He wasn't one to overestimate anyone's abilities.

"You can't teach a cat fire ninjutsu," Anko said firmly. She didn't draw the line often, but this seemed like a good place to do so.

Karin just scoffed, "Hater," under her breath, but Hinata looked up from her attempt to manipulate little paws through approximations of hand signs and calmly uttered, "That's what you keep saying, but I'm not convinced."

"Why else would Naruto be so convinced Smaug is a dragon?" Karin added practically. "Maybe Smaug is a fire-natured cat."

Anko rolled her eyes. "Fine, whatever, do what you want." She pointedly edged far away from the cat experiment and worked her way to the kitchen. Hinata was the only person that damn animal seemed to tolerate, and she wasn't interested in bleeding from her face. (Smaug always went for the eyes or throat). She dropped her bag on the floor as she went, and yanked open the fridge to contemplatively frown inside. Triumphantly, she withdrew a container of leftovers, peeled the lid up to sniff it, and then asked, "D'you think Aiko would notice if I took these blanched vegetables?"

"Probably," Aiko drawled, leaning against the counter and eying Anko's back.

The older girl jumped a bit and hit her head on a shelf, cursing. "Don't fucking sneak up on me, bitch!"

Aiko huffed in amusement, digging around the fruit bowl for an apple. She just wasn't seeing one, though. Maybe she'd had the last one yesterday? "It's my house. I can sneak if I want to."

"That's no excuse," Anko snapped, cradling her head and letting the fridge shut with a bang.

"Oh, lay off it," Karin sighed, wandering in to poke around sadly at the empty cookie jar. "Hey, Aiko, you love me, right? Since you're so nice, would you-"

"'So nice'? Is that the best you can do?" She raised an eyebrow at her cousin skeptically. "That's pretty weak flattery. Maybe you should say something about my impeccable style, or my awesome hair day, or-"

"I'm an honest girl, and I don't want cookies that badly," Karin shot back with a smirk. "I would never undermine my integrity for food." Unseen, Anko (intrepid fridge looter that she was) flipped Karin off. Bored, Karin dropped the lid with a clatter that made Aiko wince, but at least it didn't crack either the jar or lid. "I guess it doesn't matter. We need to go."

"Anko. You didn't plan for lunch, then?" When Anko shook her head with a pathetic pout, Aiko sighed with faux irritation. "Just take my bento then, you utter barbarian. I'll go out for lunch. When are you guys going to be back?"

Hinata meandered in, snatching the blue bento out of Anko's greedy claws and dutifully packing it away with hers and Karin's boxes in a knapsack. "Tomorrow morning, if all goes as planned."

"Alright, I'll probably still be here then."

The house emptied, but Aiko wandered aimlessly from room to room, feeling restless and strange. She'd been asked not to work any further on Sen Tsurara without supervision, and shishou was out on another mission above her skill level. Yamato was probably with him, but she didn't have an idea as to who his third teammate would be.

'I bet Sasuke's around,' she mused. 'I haven't seen him in forever. Maybe we could do lunch and catch up?'

Since he had begun his specialization, Sasuke had been entirely confined to the village. Oddly enough, he didn't seem resentful. That probably meant his training was going very well—he liked seeing visible improvement. Off hand, she couldn't think of anything else that would mitigate the irritation of not getting any chance to stretch his legs and get in real fights.

Although she was still a little achy from her workout late last night, Aiko felt much more optimistic about her day when she had something of a plan.

It only took an instant for her to realize that she didn't envy her housemates who would be sleeping outside that night. Even as she opened the door, Aiko had to cringe away from the biting wind. She slammed it immediately and walked right back into the house to change clothes.

Pulling a long-sleeved blue shirt much like her shishou's out of her closet, she had to freeze and giggle hysterically at the thought of how miserable Karin must be in her shorts. There was no way that Anko would let her go back for a change just because she hadn't planned well (never mind that Anko was a terrible planner as well). Just because it amused her, she changed out of her own shorts and pulled on a short white skirt over blue leggings instead of wearing pants like a responsible, grown-up kunoichi would. She completed the outfit with shoes that had been a gag gift (at least, she hoped it wasn't a sign that his taste in fashion had gotten even sillier) that Naruto had mailed to her from a city she'd never even heard of. They were shaped something like Mary Janes and appeared to be white patent leather… with a smiling cat face in black stitching on the toe area.

'These are fucking awesome', she had decided when she'd opened the package.

Karin hadn't seemed to agree, but it wasn't Aiko's fault that the other redhead had no taste. It was a shame, but there it was.

Lunch with Sasuke didn't work out—when she stopped by the hospital to try to find him, she was told he was with a patient and couldn't be disturbed. So she asked that he be told that she had stopped by, but didn't really hold much faith that he would get back to her in time. It was ten in the morning already at that point, after all. Bored and a bit lonely, she decided to get the unpleasant task of some clothes shopping out of the way, while Karin was safely out of the village and unable to nitpick. She didn't feel like she was getting fat or had put on weight, but her clothes weren't fitting like they used to. Even the skirt she was wearing at the moment was a little too snug to really provide the freedom of movement she needed.

Looking in the mirror in the changing room, she felt a little more daring than she had the last time she had gone clothes shopping. That had been when she was twelve… The thought brought her the unpleasant realization that she hadn't had a growth spurt in a very long time.

Regardless, now that she was finally old enough—technically a legal adult, by Konoha's standards even though fourteen seemed frightfully young to her—she was willing to get slightly more risqué with her leisure wear, if not her mission clothing.

As Konoha was much more prone to small, specific stores run by families instead of large department stores, that meant quite a few trips around town that loaded her down with a good forty pounds of bags. Staggering slightly, not from the weight but from the unwieldiness of her load, Aiko set off to drop her new things off at home—and startled when an irritated looking Yamanaka grabbed her shoulder from behind.

"How rude!" Ino sniffed, looking at her purple-painted nails. "You didn't come to tell me about how your date went, after I slaved over getting you ready."

Aiko blinked, mildly confused. 'Slaved? She brought over something she already owned and put my hair in a bun with a fabric flower. Maybe this is more of that ettiquite I missed out on?'

"I'm sorry," she apologized, trying to rearrange her bags to better see the road she was accidentally blocking. Shikamaru, Asuma, and Chouji came up the road in the direction Ino must have come from, wearing varying expressions of boredom and irritation.

"Ino, let the poor girl go home," Asuma drawled through a cigarette. Ino blushed, but didn't back off.

"Yes, weren't we going somewhere?" Chouji said pointedly, glaring at his kunoichi comrade.

Shikamaru seemed to have a sudden idea. At least, the suddenly wicked gleam in his eye indicated that it was a good one. But when he finally voiced it, it sounded surprisingly tame. "Why don't you just invite her along, so we can get going?"

Ino scowled at him, but it seemed to be more out of habit than anything. "Fine." She snatched most of the bags off of Aiko's arms despite her protestations—and then shoved them at Shikamaru and Chouji while Asuma snickered, giving Aiko a conspiratorial wink she didn't understand. "Look alive, boys, you weren't seriously going to let a lady carry all this?" She peeked inside one, and let a sly smile creep across her face. "You went clothes shopping all on your own? I'm so proud."

"I usually go shopping on my own," Aiko said dryly. "I don't particularly appreciate the implication that I'm incapable of dressing myself. I'm a big girl. I tie my own sandals and everything."

Chouji blinked and looked down at her definitely unfastened shoes with a vaguely perplexed expression. There wasn't anything to tie. They were slip-ons. He opened his mouth—and then Asuma slapped a palm over it. Ino didn't notice when he leaned over and muttered, "It's best not to get involved," and then gave him a commiserating pat on the back.

They fell to the back of the group, partly because they were lazy and partly because it was safest to be out of Ino's direct line of vision. As soon as there was enough distance, Chouji elbowed his friend and muttered, "What's going on?"

Shikamaru snorted, warily eying Ino as if to gauge the distance before he dared speak up. "Isn't it obvious?" he grouched. "Ino is feeling territorial and jealous, now that it's sunk in that her friend would rather spend time with another girl. She doesn't want to date Aiko and she'd turn her down if she was asked on a date, but she doesn't like that Aiko would pick someone else over her. She's convinced herself that since she's the most desirable," (here he rolled his eyes), "that it doesn't make sense that anyone wouldn't want to date her."

They hadn't noticed that Asuma had lingered close enough to hear them until he gave a low chuckle. "That's a pretty good analysis, Shikamaru, but you missed something."

He looked distinctly put out at the gentle admonition. "That so," Shikamaru said flatly.

"Yes." Asuma replied, looking amused by the whole thing. "But I think I'll let you figure the rest out on your own. You're missing something pretty major about what this says about Ino's personality."

"She's bossy, territorial, and passive aggressive?" Chouji offered up just a little too loudly. Shikamaru reflexively flinched, until he realized that Ino had somehow been too distracted by whatever she was babbling to hear the insult as she usually did with those terrifying bat-ears of hers. (Even if Chouji hadn't meant to be insulting at all, she would hit him senseless when she caught him).

"We already knew all that. No, that's not what he meant. She's highly insecure," Shikamaru said flatly, giving his friend a scathing look for nearly setting Ino's massive temper on them. Chouji gave a cringing, apologetic grin in response. "None of this would be necessary if she didn't put such high importance on her physical desirability, but she's also feeling threatened by one of her few female friends spending time with another girl. Ino subconsciously thinks that Aiko is going to leave her like Sakura did, back in the Academy."

Asuma nodded. "Got it in one, so be nice to your teammate, alright boys?"

"Tch," Shikamaru deflected, turning his face away. He wouldn't have teased her about it- not much, anyway. They were friends, after all, even if she was troublesome.

"I'm glad we have this opportunity to talk, Kakashi."

Sunlight pinged off of perfectly straight teeth, and Yamato cringed a little. There was just something about being around Gai that made him feel like he had a massive hangover—sunlight and noises suddenly became painful.

It didn't make any sense, but there it was.

Kakashi yawned, letting his eye close blearily. Maybe Gai would get bored and go chase butterflies if he didn't play into his hands?

As pleasant as the thought was, it just wasn't to be.

"What do you think about the recent development inextricably bonding our teams?" Gai grinned, giving a confusing little chuckle that Kakashi refused to think too deeply about along with his 'thumbs-up'.

Yamato twitched. 'This is not inextricable bonding,' he grumped. 'It's one mission, turtle man.'

Kakashi seemed to be having similar thoughts. Instead of replying verbally, he just raised one eyebrow and pulled out a book. He actually startled (rather like when someone steps on a cat's tail, Yamato mused) at Gai's booming laugh—that was traditionally where Gai would mope about being dismissed. Was something going on?

"Oh, my rival, you are too cool," Gai wiped away an inexplicable tear. "How hip of you, to pretend that you did not know that your young apprentice has fallen for my student's charms!"

There was a bizarre sound when Yamato simultaneously wheezed in surprise and forgot how to walk, ending up face-down in the dirt. Kakashi couldn't blame him. He was trying to remember…

'Did Aiko sustain any head injuries while we were gone?' Try as he might, he couldn't think of any potential cause for such a radical change in personality. 'Is she ill? Has she been dared to do something by that Yamanaka girl?'

"What."

The flat response seemed to delight Gai, who gave a wicked smile. "Why, if I didn't know better, I'd say that she hadn't told you that she was going to ask the lovely Tenten out on a romantic encounter!"

Time and space tilted back onto their usual axis, and Kakashi breathed a sigh of relief. Right. It wasn't that strange Lee boy, or even the terrifyingly unstable Hyuuga. It was the perfectly normal… girl…

'Huh. I never would have guessed.' Kakashi shrugged. Then he wondered if he knew of any other kunoichi couples. That was much more common in the civilian sector (where relationships were much less likely to be influenced by clan politics requiring that people reproduce at a young age to replace them when they inevitably died at age 22 or so. It was sort of the vicious cycle of shinobi life.)

Then again, Aiko didn't really have a clan-influenced upbringing, and as far as he knew Gai's student didn't come from a ninja family. So they might not even be approaching their relationship from the generally accepted shinobi practice of indulging in same-sex relationships temporarily before they eventually got down to the clan mandated reproduction.

He stopped in his tracks, suddenly terrified that his student had gotten into a serious relationship. But... but… Wasn't Aiko too young to be mooning over older girls? 'If she tries to come to me for romantic advice, I will request deportment to Suna,' he decided darkly.

With that, he happily dismissed the train of thought. He'd already decided Aiko was a big girl. She could take care of herself. Unless she asked him for help, he'd assume that she would be able beat the older girl into next week on her own if this 'Tenten' got too fresh.

"You've got to be kidding me," Suigetsu whined under his voice, flipping through the latest edition of the bingo book. Reading it in the dark of the sketchy bar he was in was hard enough that he had to check a second time ot be certain he hadn't just missed a page. The first sword he wanted to acquire should have been easy to find- Zabuza surely merited a fucking page in the bingo book. He'd been locked up in Orochimaru's shithole for a while, but not that long.

Of course, Suigetsu hadn't investigated the political state of his old country. All he had to know was that there would be no point to returning unless it was the only way to complete his goal, and he'd rather try to kill them all than kowtow to the fuckers who had been ruining his childhood home when he'd left. Hence why he had gotten the hell out of there before the Mist backup team those Konoha and Sand nin were expecting had showed up. Depending on who was in charge, he would either have been dragged back into their forces or would have had to cut his way out. He hadn't liked his chances at that- he wasn't an idiot. Suigetsu recognized Hatake Kakashi when he saw him, and didn't particularly want to fight a lightning user without a damn good blade. Besides, it would have been a damn shame to have to cut up those two girls.

He felt himself smirk at the thought, trying not to get too excited at the thought of cutting up such pretty skin. It would be fun in the short term, but he'd rather flirt with hot girls than dismember them, even if the blonde was a fucking bitch with stupid weaponry. At least the redhead had a sword, plain as it was. Suigetsu shivered at the memory- he'd been locked up for long enough that immediately running into a pretty bitch cutting people up had probably softened him to her more than was wise or deserved. She wasn't that good, after all. Nothing on him or his goals for the best group of swords there had ever been.

"Hey, you." He slammed his fist irritably on the countertop, catching the barkeep's attention. The woman rolled her eyes, but meandered over.

"What the hell now, brat? That's the latest edition."

"Can't be," Suigetsu sneered. "Where the hell is Momochi Zabuza?"

She snorted, thoroughly unimpressed. "You fuckin' kidding me? He's been dead for a while. Some Konoha team ganked him.

'What,' Suigetsu thought flatly. 'Is she fucking serious? I was just with a Konoha team last week. If I'd known... I could have pretended to be with the current administration and gotten some information.'

"Realllly," he drawled out, looking unimpressed. "Can you get a little more specific?"

"It'll cost you." She grinned at him, shamelessly displaying a missing tooth. Then she froze, wide-eyed at the sword kissing her throat.

"Or," Suigetsu purred into her ear, from his new position behind her. He was thoroughly fed up with this bullshit. "You could just tell me, because we're such good friends."

Stiffly, she leaned back as best as she could, trying not to move too much when she muttered, "Fine, asshole. Let me go, so I can show you." He withdrew enough to let her move around, but kept his sword out and his eyes on her when she grudgingly rifled through the more unofficial bingo book entries. That in itself told him something- whoever he was looking for wasn't a missing nin, and the country who had blacklisted them wasn't technically at war with their home village. That was the only reason they'd be in the unofficial bookings. Someone wanted them dead, but didn't want to be liable for it.

The bartender ripped the page clean out of her book and shoved it at him, never minding that it crinkled. "Enjoy. Now get the hell out of this establishment."

"Gladly," Suigetsu muttered, sheathing his blade and snatching the bounty. He didn't even look at it until he got outside in the fresh air.

At that point, he cursed up a storm.

'Well, at least I know the bitch's name now,' he thought darkly. 'Definitely should have claimed to be allies.'

She looked younger on paper, but the redhead with the sword was unmistakable. Picture must have been old. Squinting, he decided it must have been her headshot after Academy graduation, which meant she didn't take a lot of high-profile missions. If she did, there would be more recent unofficial shots of her. That probably pegged her as some sort of specialist that seldom worked with clients, like an assassin or a tracker.

"Which means that tracking her down without infiltrating Konoha will be a pain," he muttered. Maybe it would be more worth his time to investigate what the hell was going on in Mist, first.