Tumgik
#Online Health News
tizzimenews · 1 year
Text
Medical news today
Health News: Latest Research, Top Stories, Trending Topics. Stay up to date with the latest medical news today and health news that matter most to you and your family.
Tumblr media
1 note · View note
iirulancorrino · 2 months
Text
The Green brothers are doing effective altruism better than maybe 95% of people who identify online as effective altruists.
341 notes · View notes
Text
Privacy first
Tumblr media
The internet is embroiled in a vicious polycrisis: child safety, surveillance, discrimination, disinformation, polarization, monopoly, journalism collapse – not only have we failed to agree on what to do about these, there's not even a consensus that all of these are problems.
But in a new whitepaper, my EFF colleagues Corynne McSherry, Mario Trujillo, Cindy Cohn and Thorin Klosowski advance an exciting proposal that slices cleanly through this Gordian knot, which they call "Privacy First":
https://www.eff.org/wp/privacy-first-better-way-address-online-harms
Here's the "Privacy First" pitch: whatever is going on with all of the problems of the internet, all of these problems are made worse by commercial surveillance.
Worried your kid is being made miserable through targeted ads? No surveillance, no targeting.
Worried your uncle was turned into a Qanon by targeted disinformation? No surveillance, no targeting. Worried that racialized people are being targeted for discriminatory hiring or lending by algorithms? No surveillance, no targeting.
Worried that nation-state actors are exploiting surveillance data to attack elections, politicians, or civil servants? No surveillance, no surveillance data.
Worried that AI is being trained on your personal data? No surveillance, no training data.
Worried that the news is being killed by monopolists who exploit the advantage conferred by surveillance ads to cream 51% off every ad-dollar? No surveillance, no surveillance ads.
Worried that social media giants maintain their monopolies by filling up commercial moats with surveillance data? No surveillance, no surveillance moat.
The fact that commercial surveillance hurts so many groups of people in so many ways is terrible, of course, but it's also an amazing opportunity. Thus far, the individual constituencies for, say, saving the news or protecting kids have not been sufficient to change the way these big platforms work. But when you add up all the groups whose most urgent cause would be significantly improved by comprehensive federal privacy law, vigorously enforced, you get an unstoppable coalition.
America is decades behind on privacy. The last really big, broadly applicable privacy law we passed was a law banning video-store clerks from leaking your porn-rental habits to the press (Congress was worried about their own rental histories after a Supreme Court nominee's movie habits were published in the Washington City Paper):
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Video_Privacy_Protection_Act
In the decades since, we've gotten laws that poke around the edges of privacy, like HIPAA (for health) and COPPA (data on under-13s). Both laws are riddled with loopholes and neither is vigorously enforced:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/09/how-to-make-a-child-safe-tiktok/
Privacy First starts with the idea of passing a fit-for-purpose, 21st century privacy law with real enforcement teeth (a private right of action, which lets contingency lawyers sue on your behalf for a share of the winnings):
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2022/07/americans-deserve-more-current-american-data-privacy-protection-act
Here's what should be in that law:
A ban on surveillance advertising:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2022/03/ban-online-behavioral-advertising
Data minimization: a prohibition on collecting or processing your data beyond what is strictly necessary to deliver the service you're seeking.
Strong opt-in: None of the consent theater click-throughs we suffer through today. If you don't give informed, voluntary, specific opt-in consent, the service can't collect your data. Ignoring a cookie click-through is not consent, so you can just bypass popups and know you won't be spied on.
No preemption. The commercial surveillance industry hates strong state privacy laws like the Illinois biometrics law, and they are hoping that a federal law will pre-empt all those state laws. Federal privacy law should be the floor on privacy nationwide – not the ceiling:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2022/07/federal-preemption-state-privacy-law-hurts-everyone
No arbitration. Your right to sue for violations of your privacy shouldn't be waivable in a clickthrough agreement:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2022/04/stop-forced-arbitration-data-privacy-legislation
No "pay for privacy." Privacy is not a luxury good. Everyone deserves privacy, and the people who can least afford to buy private alternatives are most vulnerable to privacy abuses:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2020/10/why-getting-paid-your-data-bad-deal
No tricks. Getting "consent" with confusing UIs and tiny fine print doesn't count:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2019/02/designing-welcome-mats-invite-user-privacy-0
A Privacy First approach doesn't merely help all the people harmed by surveillance, it also prevents the collateral damage that today's leading proposals create. For example, laws requiring services to force their users to prove their age ("to protect the kids") are a privacy nightmare. They're also unconstitutional and keep getting struck down.
A better way to improve the kid safety of the internet is to ban surveillance. A surveillance ban doesn't have the foreseeable abuses of a law like KOSA (the Kids Online Safety Act), like bans on information about trans healthcare, medication abortions, or banned books:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/05/kids-online-safety-act-still-huge-danger-our-rights-online
When it comes to the news, banning surveillance advertising would pave the way for a shift to contextual ads (ads based on what you're looking at, not who you are). That switch would change the balance of power between news organizations and tech platforms – no media company will ever know as much about their readers as Google or Facebook do, but no tech company will ever know as much about a news outlet's content as the publisher does:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/05/save-news-we-must-ban-surveillance-advertising
This is a much better approach than the profit-sharing arrangements that are being trialed in Australia, Canada and France (these are sometimes called "News Bargaining Codes" or "Link Taxes"). Funding the news by guaranteeing it a share of Big Tech's profits makes the news into partisans for that profit – not the Big Tech watchdogs we need them to be. When Torstar, Canada's largest news publisher, struck a profit-sharing deal with Google, they killed their longrunning, excellent investigative "Defanging Big Tech" series.
A privacy law would also protect access to healthcare, especially in the post-Roe era, when Big Tech surveillance data is being used to target people who visit abortion clinics or secure medication abortions. It would end the practice of employers forcing workers to wear health-monitoring gadget. This is characterized as a "voluntary" way to get a "discount" on health insurance – but in practice, it's a way of punishing workers who refuse to let their bosses know about their sleep, fertility, and movements.
A privacy law would protect marginalized people from all kinds of digital discrimination, from unfair hiring to unfair lending to unfair renting. The commercial surveillance industry shovels endless quantities of our personal information into the furnaces that fuel these practices. A privacy law shuts off the fuel supply:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/04/digital-privacy-legislation-civil-rights-legislation
There are plenty of ways that AI will make our lives worse, but copyright won't fix it. For issues of labor exploitation (especially by creative workers), the answer lies in labor law:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/01/how-the-writers-guild-sunk-ais-ship/
And for many of AI's other harms, a muscular privacy law would starve AI of some of its most potentially toxic training data:
https://www.businessinsider.com/tech-updated-terms-to-use-customer-data-to-train-ai-2023-9
Meanwhile, if you're worried about foreign governments targeting Americans – officials, military, or just plain folks – a privacy law would cut off one of their most prolific and damaging source of information. All those lawmakers trying to ban Tiktok because it's a surveillance tool? What about banning surveillance, instead?
Monopolies and surveillance go together like peanut butter and chocolate. Some of the biggest tech empires were built on mountains of nonconsensually harvested private data – and they use that data to defend their monopolies. Legal privacy guarantees are a necessary precursor to data portability and interoperability:
https://www.eff.org/wp/interoperability-and-privacy
Once we are guaranteed a right to privacy, lawmakers and regulators can order tech giants to tear down their walled gardens, rather than relying on tech companies to (selectively) defend our privacy:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/14/luxury-surveillance/#liar-liar
The point here isn't that privacy fixes all the internet's woes. The policy is "privacy first," not "just privacy." When it comes to making a new, good internet, there's plenty of room for labor law, civil rights legislation, antitrust, and other legal regimes. But privacy has the biggest constituency, gets us the most bang for the buck, and has the fewest harmful side-effects. It's a policy we can all agree on, even if we don't agree on much else. It's a coalition in potentia that would be unstoppable in reality. Privacy first! Then – everything else!
Tumblr media
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/12/06/privacy-first/#but-not-just-privacy
Tumblr media
Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg
CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en
436 notes · View notes
darlinguistics · 5 months
Text
'its just IMPOSSIBLE to not be addicted to your phone nowadays its UNREALISTIC-'
heres some advice to being less chronically online. for gen z (and younger??) who dont even know how to start thinking about it and have only heard shitty advice from older adults who just genuinely do not get it, from a fellow gen z and my experiences so far.
*these are personal and may not all 100% resonate but its still good prompting to start thinking about things! PLEASE feel free to add your own stories/advice in the notes! support your fellow humans, dont gatekeep what youve learned, lets have these conversations! and no negativity/pessimism please <3
first thing is to make it a less scary thought, a more concrete idea and not a hypothetical. it doesnt have to be all-or-nothing, cold turkey, a huge announcement and a fundamental shift in your personality. the internet will be in your life for the rest of your life, this is an ongoing relationship you are trying to make healthier thats all! and it takes one step at a time and some self-compassion, but a true effort nonetheless. 'dont you think thats a bit too serious-' if youre my age you quite literally grew up and developed online, it is literally part of your psyche the way your childhood is, it IS serious, you deserve to treat it seriously.
dont save your login info/dont stay logged in for social media accounts, having to manually log in when you want to go on like youre on some elementary school chrome book is a really healthy and clear boundary to have between being logged off and logged on.
-> bigger challenge - uninstall it on your phone in general, only log on on your laptop/pc if applicable for you!
if youre motivated to, try to work on your posture too. i only say that because most of our bad posture is at least partially related to being on our phones a lot, and when i started wanting to fix my posture, completely separately and unrelated from trying to break my phone addiction, it made it easier to lose interest in my phone since i didnt want to ruin my progress with my posture. it made me start to have a mindset like 'well if you cant do this on your phone with good posture then dont do it' and 'if youre on your phone so long your posture starts to cave in, youve probably spent too long on your phone anyway'
listen to music more. its easier for me to kinda write off my phone and do other things if i just open music or a podcast or long youtube video on it. i know we all love long video essays, but i recommend music more specifically for me at least because im less inclined to pause music or scroll while listening to it for some reason? whereas using a show or video or podcast for white noise, im way more likely to also be scrolling on my phone and that is my activity lol. music for some reason i dont want to interrupt and instead of being on my phone i can clean or do something productive on my computer etc
this one is sooo hard but try to fall asleep with some distance between you and your phone, even just a couple feet. mine stays on the desk next to my bed which isnt that far but its better than on bed like it used to be. when you wake up you probably wont feel like reaching for it right away if its far and even better if you have to get up for it because then at least you stand and move your body first thing instead of looking at your phone first thing. and try to get more and more of your morning routine done before touching your phone over time.
-> for me, i started by just trying to at least wake up a bit in bed before touching it, then stand up before touching it, then stand and stretch, then going to the bathroom first, making coffee first, feeding the cat first, etc. its surprisingly helpful to have a specific chore/task in mind that is The requirement so that everytime you do it you get a lil dopamine rush for unlocking your phone from yourself lmao. when the weather was nice i used to make my Requirement being outside first before going on it and i LOVED that. esp as it got easier and i started doing more and more before going on it and finally walking outside with coffee and my phone felt like such a pleasant little reward.
find a hobby that uses your hands. example: i really need to get back into knitting because when i did it regularly so much time that wouldve been on my phone was spent knitting with music/podcasts/shows/(even online lectures! when i felt productive lol) playing. its the same amount of physical relaxing - barely moving lol - but uses a longer attention span and a much better dopamine hit than scrolling, i literally MADE things.
-> you might be thinking, 'but mindless knitting isnt better than mindless scrolling is it?' but that mindless feeling on your phone is just that, mindless. the mindless feeling you get when doing something like knitting is actually closer to a flow state, which is actually incredibly good for you, like a fulfilling nutritious meal as opposed to 'empty calories' or whatever
get a widget for your homescreen that shows your screen time. i have one and of course it doesnt always stop me but seeing that time go up all day the more i use it and the pride of keeping it low is really helpful
practice grounding. in general.
spend more time on anonymous activities and have more privacy and less attachment with your 'persona' - what i mean by that is, i consider things like scrolling through tumblr (for me personally!) to be relatively harmless because i dont try to like,, brand myself here. if youre a tumblr regular you know the jokes - 0 follows, 0 notes, screaming to the void, moots you dont talk to, blorbo pfp and urls, fake names everywhere, and we're having fun! basically targeting the 'everyone is famous now' thing with this one - embrace being a nobody with no personal stakes here
-> personally ive never kept up with having social media accounts that are actually just, me irl - like a facebook or main instagram, like a locals account yknow? but i think it goes for that too - stop spending so much time trying to further personalize your online presence in the hopes of it representing you perfectly - because it never will, and it shouldnt, and you shouldnt aspire for that. your social media presence is lighthearted and incredibly surface-level, treat it like that! thats not me bashing social media either, having that mindset will make it more enjoyable bc youll be using it as it should be used!
do following/followers or camera roll/files or app purges. this is also a soft launch type of way to practice easing into a better mindset. aside from just literally getting rid of junk, the process of trying to judge whether or not you need something is good practice in mindfulness! even if you dont delete everything you feel like you maybe should, thats fine, youll do other purges in the future too. eventually youll get better at parting with things and realizing when things that feel good in a moment are actually bad for you. and it forces you to regularly check in on your more long-lasting parasocial relationships online and how theyre serving you or not
speaking of parasocial - for actual friends, if theyre irl, think about how much you interact with them online vs in person and why you think that is and how it affects you. maybe youll wanna see them more irl if possible (i promise its better for your friendship), maybe youll realize you dont need to keep tabs on them anymore (old high school acquaintances lookin at you). for celebrities and fandom things - try to think about the bare minimum content from them you could do with. you dont have to unstan all your faves and stop enjoying things - but do you need their notifications on? do you need to have a stan account? do you need them on all the platforms? do you need to have all that saved content of them? are there aspects of this that you love that could be found elsewhere?
if youre of the genre of online where you just cant help yourself from getting involved in big discussions or discourse and arguments - i recommend journaling when you get upset by something online, articulating your feelings without the idea of someone ever reading it and without the goal of 'winning' or being the most correct and logical or even the most sympathetic and morally good. take away every audience aspect of it. what is this really about for you, and why would strangers online deserve to hear your personal well-thought out opinions? why would your thoughts deserve to be simplified and misconstrued and underappreciated the way they would be in this discussion? is there even an outcome to this where you feel truly satisfied? are their people who are more worthy of hearing your thoughts who arent part of this audience? is this a conversation that is best held online where so much communicative nuance is inevitably sacrificed?
in the end these are all just practices in remembering how in control you are. and that goes for if any of these are scary or too difficult sounding too! these all become less scary if you remember that as soon as anything becomes too uncomfortable or painful, you have all the power to stop doing it, make a change, and try again later. so much of advice for quitting bad habits can be intimidating because the pressure and the shame that would come from failing scares you out of the possible benefits of trying - just go ahead and kill that shame from the jump. of course youre going to fail! you are going to have setbacks! thats part of it! you have agency in this, always. the internet is not inherently or completely evil nor good. build trust in yourself to make the calls on when it is serving you and when it isnt on a case-by-case basis, and then give yourself permission to learn through trial and error.
and remember you are worth all of this effort. i believe in us <3
55 notes · View notes
ecoqueer · 2 years
Text
I wish that people gave a shit about nonbinary people who don’t use they/them pronouns. You can literally give your friend group (which includes another nonbinary person) a list of your favorite pronouns, none of which include they/them, and mention several times that you don’t like they/them pronouns for yourself, but they’ll make the switch from she/her pronouns to…they/them. And feel super proud of themselves for being sooo progressive as to use they/them pronouns for you….when those aren’t your pronouns.
I think that saying “he she and they are my least favorite but are fine in combination with other things…I’m really fine with any neos but here’s a list of my faves that you can choose from!” Is polite and not a difficult request. I’m not good at being a pushy person, and I shouldn’t need to be.
#it screams#i guess I’ll pull the lists out again and re-link them#but the aforementioned friends view messages from me as a chore and check them rarely so when they do they’ve built up and so just skim#everything#which I’m fucking tired of#I’ve been going back and forth on whether it’s better to have no friends or a few friends who make you feel shitty#dunno which is worse#they also are extremely cavalier with covid while knowing I have no health insurance#and have supported some statements/actions that really make me sad#so idk I might be basically friendless at this point#i hold on for too long to people who have clearly moved on and don’t much care about being my friend anymore#I’ve tried reaching out a few times to no avail so idk I might just give up#try to cultivate online relationships more#which feels pretty impossible to me#sigh#I’ve been not able to sleep well#because of issues in my life with…all of the few people in it#issues that could be solved if I had kept a wider support network#instead of getting trapped with someone who was abusing me and my friends who don’t seem to give a shit about that and expressed more#concern for him than for me when the news was revealed to them#again I don’t have health insurance so no therapist#which I fucking desperately need right now#i have no one separate to talk to#the one who knows all of the different factors from all of the angles…is the abuser#i feel like I’m in so much fucking pain and I feel so alone and all of the people in my life who are supposed to be my loved ones#are standing around me ignoring me completely and acting like everything is okay#just causing me more and more pain#well this didn’t start out intended as a vent but it sure turned into one huh#i wish I could convey to y’all the desperation and loneliness and aching that I feel#vent
724 notes · View notes
tricksterlatte · 4 months
Text
Anyone else think short form social media based on algorithms designed to promote topics that create more engagement instead of more joy, the idea of fast fashion but conveyed through social media, and the fact you can monetize suffering and outrage better than ever has largely resulted in the death spiral of media literacy and the mass emergence of bad faith readings?
#I may be venting a lil but god it blows my mind#fyp is a blessing and a curse because i don't think ppl were ever meant to be subjected to this many ppl at once#god i took a bird site hiatus for weeks and now BARELY check it and it already feels like a hit#oughhhhh#even fandom spaces have hugely incorporated marketing and networking into them bc of cmms and sponsorship and building portfolio#which would be fine tbh if it weren't for the way socmed is designed#now it's like you can't support too many ppl or else you're shadow banned or you have to make yourself palatable and marketable#and websites with threads in which people will only read the first post before qrting because ratios are seen as five minutes of fame#features that permit beating an algorithm are locked behind a paywall that promises you money if you go viral#and what goes viral is usually incendiary content meant for those ratios or trends. whether for or against OP#even in hobbyist spaces the climate has changed so much due to the monetization and marketing and just. ugh#not to mention side accounts dedicated to gossip in this new priv account culture like...idk#if you have to make another account so you can make fun of a friend on main with selected priv friends it just doesn't sit well with me#and not every priv account does this but enough do and it makes me tired#unsolicited hate comments are still as bad as they used to be on ff dot net except now people openly are proud of it more#why do most socmed feel like passive aggressive sticky notes on high school lockers#there is so much more I could say about everything that has left me weary about the internet but I don't know the time or place#and I don't want anyone to think this is about them because it's a general statement. though if you are doing the more inflammatory things.#maybe rethink that. it's not good for anyone else and it's not good for you either#I keep coming back online to check on ppl and see art and I *know* it's draining for my health every time#but I feel a lot better now that i use socmed less overall. and that I try to focus on what makes me happy#it just sucks seeing so many people i care about endure absolutely wild struggles bc people online do not care.#I like rambling in my tags because this is the only place I ramble except my personal journal and to my wife
20 notes · View notes
7hyein · 4 months
Text
read tags ;--;
#soo ermmm im not that type of person who likes to say these stuff but errrrrt#i decided i might quit tumblr cuz it's kinda actually ruining my mental health a lil bit#and school is driving me crazy like there's so much work to do#and i have to take exams for 2 more weeks + i have online classes on saturday too 😨😨#SIDE EYE#if I decided not to quit then I might take a LONG BREAK FROM TUMBLR ;--;;.#anyways I'm not gonna make new mbs tho#I'm gonna post my old drafts that I've made before instead#sorry if u guys don't like my new mbs . 🌚#and what bothers me is that I mostly spend my time on tumblr instead of studying#🌚🌚🌚🌚🌚🌚#and I might fail my exams cuz of that reason ;//#i DO not want to get yelled by my mom for failing 🔥🔥💯💯#if i fail my moms gonna take away my phone n i don't hv access to my tumblr acc#ughhh i hate my school for giving me to do exams ffor 3 weeks straigjt#THIS SUCKS#ARGHJEHEHEBB#i study like everyday#i haven't got sleep for like 2 days cuz of the ugky goofy ahh exams#TMR EXAM WEEK CONTINUE AGAIN. 🌚🌚#manifesting that I will pass ECONOMICS 💯💯🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥#PUKU PUKU POW POW RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 💯💯💯💯💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥#AND IM GONNA START BEING IA#I'LL POST 5 OF MY OLD DRAFTS TMR MORNING.#and the fact taht i still HAVE to study during the time I get to school#SORRY FOR BAD ENGLISH UGHHH#I'M DEAD#Я МЕРТВ 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯#jumps off a cliff#🌚🌚🌚
17 notes · View notes
honeyteacakes · 7 months
Text
///
21 notes · View notes
talentforlying · 1 month
Note
(No spoilers but about Issue #4 of Hellblazer: Dead in America if you haven’t read it yet)
.
.
Si Spurrier is out for our jugulars with Lore Accurate Dad!John 😭😭 the hesitation, the fear, wanting to be better and make sure Noah doesn’t end up like him :(((
Fuck Thomas Constantine 2k24
aaaa i'm going out to pick up my physical copy tomorrow, this is SO exciting to hear!!!!
see this is why i'm so adamant that dadstantine is a genuinely interesting development for john and why i love it when i see it!! it highlights the better nature that new 52 writers completely lost sight of AND all the cyclical properties of his self-destruction, while giving him the opportunity to either break free of his father's ghost or re-chain himself to that legacy of damage. also i love noah with my LIFE.
FUCK thomas constantine 2k24, i'm so glad you're enjoying the spurrier run!!! i can't wait to read it!!!
7 notes · View notes
ladyazulina · 5 months
Text
I've noticed that I've been suffering from a lack of social interaction these last weeks and it has been heavily noted in my mental health, making me spend my advent's birthday awfully bad.
(I took the 'advent' term because something like those advent gifts is what I wanna do for myself starting next year... because for this one is a bit too late.)
I'm aware I'm not a social presence and I come and go in spurs and moments, I don't really believe I have mutuals or friends yet, and I would like to start to right my wrongs by showing more support in the community even with my unstable presence. I would like to talk and share and be there for as many people as I'm able to cross by, I know myself enough to know I'm that kind of person when I feel good. I'm just a bit awkward and don't know what to even do with myself, but I'm always trying, and I want to start my new year with the best energy I can muster after weeks of being down and stagnant.
So... hi. Even a word would mean the world to me. My new year is in three days, on December 20th; this will be my twenty-fifth winter ❄ And I wish to make tons of friends this year 💙
16 notes · View notes
tizzimenews · 1 year
Text
Flu and Covid: People told to avoid mixing at Christmas if unwell - Tizzime
People have been urged to avoid mixing with vulnerable relatives if they feel unwell this Christmas.
The UK Health Security Agency (UKHSA) warned flu and Covid hospital admission rates were continuing to rise.
Health officials also encouraged everyone eligible for the vaccines to have them as soon as possible.
The warning comes as people across the UK prepare for the most open festive period since the start of coronavirus pandemic restrictions.
Parts of the UK were forced into lockdown over the Christmas period in 2020, and a wave of Covid infections meant hundreds of thousands of people were forced to isolate on Christmas Day in 2021.
All remaining Covid restrictions, including the legal requirement to self-isolate at home with symptoms, were removed earlier this year.
Covid antiviral treatment leads to faster recovery
More pupils off school ill as flu cases rise
Flu rates in Scotland at highest level since 2017
0 notes
Text
i've said before that it is completely out of line to look at a person recounting painful memories of childhood abuse and then bring up their past mistakes and i'm standing by that. i know some of you are going to jump on me for saying "mistakes" but this isn't me trivializing. this is me looking at things in context.
i haven't seen these supposed sources where they say drake bell's victim admitted to lying. i looked at news sources from the time and looked at statements given and haven't seen it anywhere in there that she admitted to lying, which i would assume would be front page news. if anyone wants to direct me to something verifiable that isn't part of a tiktok conspiracy, i would be interested. i have seen that bell wasn't convicted of actually touching the girl and they found no evidence of pictures ever being sent. the internet keeps vaguely saying the girl stalked him before and lied about her age and i don't know how true that is. it's always reprehensible to groom children and there isn't a justification for that. a few years ago i might agree with commentators saying "you don't just not know that someone is 12" but i worked at space camp for the past few years and there were a few times where i was looking for my assigned group and was told that the group that i'd assumed were 17 and 18 year olds (because they were taller than me and more muscular or filled out) were actually 12 and were actually my assigned group. idk what they're putting in the water but i assume it's these damn tiktok beauty standards. and i often have the opposite problem - when i was 16, people would assume i was 13. now that i'm 29, people assume i'm 19-14. i have a friend in her mid20s who is constantly mistaken for a 10 year old boy. it is fucking hard to tell how old someone is and if it's true that she was in his shows which were meant to be 18+ he'd have no reason to know her age. i've seen commentators state he immediately broke off contact when learning about her age.
i want to give benefit of the doubt in this case. i want to believe that the apology given was with complete accountability and remorse. imagining being in his position and realizing he may have contributed to an unsafe situation on par with one he himself experienced may have been a huge wake up call for him. i want to remind everyone though that we are not called on to forgive drake bell. we're not the wronged party in the case. the only one who can give forgiveness is the victim and victims do not owe that.
and with that i feel i should say that i can unfortunately believe that the domestic violence accusations may be true. the timeline seems to match up with the years immediately following what happened with him, the years he'd be more likely to flounder and struggle with the secret he was keeping. who knows what unprocessed trauma he was living with? it doesn't make it okay by any means (and again we are not the ones tasked with "forgiving" him and victims don't even owe that) but it makes a certain sense in context. i do think drake bell needs to come forward and tell people to stop attacking his ex on social media because come the fuck on. just because someone went through something horrific doesn't mean they can't do fucked up shit. i know i've done fucked up shit and i've worked through it as best i can. internet harassment and hate campaigns are not the way, but we didn't learn that lesson with amber heard (who i 100% believe sorry not sorry).
i think we need to move on from this mentality of holding people (particularly child stars) up on pedestals then dragging them down when they do fucked up shit. i have to believe people can change and grow. i'm willing to give people the benefit of the doubt so long as a pattern doesn't emerge. we need to move on from thinking that there is a "perfect" victim or that if someone has transgressed in later life that means their victimhood doesn't matter. we can mourn the child that drake bell was. we can mourn the child that amanda bynes was. we can mourn the person that all these people could be if they weren't swallowed by this cesspit. that is a separate conversation from talking about the ways they fucked up after coming out of that environment irreparably damaged.
leave behind the mentality that to show compassion for another human being is the same as "forgiving" them. and move on from the mentality that you personally are the one wronged when these people's lives have nothing to do with you.
7 notes · View notes
merevide · 3 months
Text
hiiiii i have returned from the depths of the underworld (self imposed hiatus) (3 week break that felt like 3 years)
8 notes · View notes
grailfish · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
pokes u on thr fumcken NOSE
8 notes · View notes
ruminate88 · 22 days
Text
Open Up Love’s Door ❤️‍🩹🎶
This song represents how I have felt in the dark, a coldness and hardness of toxic relationships and then I found real love whenever I left those toxic relationships and now I wanna show others what it’s like to make that same transformation ❤️‍🩹 and let my music heal your soul the way it’s healing mine a little each day 🥺
Lyrics: You gotta start some where How is your mental health don’t act like you don’t care I use to feel that way myself
Every time you felt low Baby, you got me high Don’t act like you don’t know You gotta give love a try
Let it set you free are you really who you want to be believe that you can change Baby, take a look at me
They say to be yourself But How is your mental health Are you who you want to be Don’t you know that love can set you free
You need love to be free Don’t give up Look at me
I’ve been there before You can open up love’s door ❤️‍🩹🎶
4 notes · View notes
outeremissary · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
Low-key driving me insane finishing art and then not being able to post it until next week, I never do that. This preparing properly-ish shit sucks. Curbing my urges by posting a work doodle. I wanted to learn to draw swallow wings.
6 notes · View notes