#Ratchet being a tired and grumpy bot

[vixassassindecepticon]

Posting the Team Prime ft. Jazz while I'm redrawing a sketch. I might add the other Autobots or Elite Guards if I can fit them in the other page so yeah-

Prowl: *Talking about the nature*

Jazz: *His aft not listening* 'He's so cute when he's talking about the things he love~'

[cybertron-after-dark]

what is wayward sparks :0?

YOU'VE ACTIVATED MY TRAP CARD >:3

This is gonna end up being a long ass post about my very goofy iterations of my blorbos and the unbelievably fucked up version of Cybertron they inhabit, so to spare those of y'all that mostly follow me for the canon tf content, I'll just put all this under the cut

To summarize, wayward sparks is the non-existent tf cartoon I've been Envisioning for a few months that starts off goofy and low-stakes but gets progressively more and more fucked up as it goes. The absolutely BRAINLESS lookin bumblebee I keep posting is supposed to be from this AU, as well as the borderline catgirl skywarp, the really grumpy Optimus, and most of the other tfa-esque redesigns I draw.

The Story

Cybertron's been at war for millennia, everyone's sick and tired of it, especially the Decepticons. They're backed into a corner, being captured and killed left and right, and a loss is just around the corner if they don't do something drastic.

So Megatron does something very drastic indeed.

He steals the Allspark, in a heist that, frankly, should've gotten his entire high command killed (though, very suspiciously, they suffered no casualties and got out unscathed, save for Blitzwing, who clipped a wing), with the intent to ambush the Ark, and finally neutralize the greatest threat to his movement and his people: Optimus Prime. Unfortunately for everyone involved, the Allspark doesn't particularly like being used as a weapon and instead decides to put everyone in timeout on an isolated little backwater planet called earth until they can learn to get along and stop trying to kill each other.

Team Prime (Optimus, Ratchet, Bumblebee, Bulkhead, Wheeljack and Prowl) are all WOEFULLY unprepared to be stranded on an alien planet with only each other, Decepticon High Command (Megatron, Starscream, Soundwave, Shockwave, Blitzwing, and Lugnut), and the very strange, very small, and VERY trigger happy humans populating the tiny rural forest town they managed to crash near.

Meanwhile, back on Cybertron, the remaining Decepticons are trying their damnedest to keep hidden, and survive underground, and the Autobots try to figure out what to do while their leader is missing. While the Autobots are left floundering without Optimus, the other active Primes and their followers (Sentinel Prime, Rodimus Prime and Windblade Convoy (yes I know she's not a prime anywhere else but let her girlboss)) try to garner favor with the Senate by picking up the slack, and taking the Decepticon problem into their own hands.

The Autobots

Aka, Optimus Prime's merry band of dysfunctional freaks.

Optimus had to find out the hard way that being a Prime means a direct connection in his mind and spark to an eldritch, incomprehensible god that likes trolling. So now he has to hear Primus in his head at random saying shit that does not make sense. And now that he's in there it's kind of a no takesies backsies situation

While being a Prime is supposed to grant you a degree of divine power, that power is only made manifest through strong dedication to a bot and to a cause. That intense loyalty is also what allows you to handle the connection in the first place. Primes that become disillusioned with their masters have a track record of going completely mad. Unfortunately for Optimus, pretty soon into his career as a prime, the Senator he swore loyalty to disgraced himself hard enough to be sentenced to shadowplay and empurata. Senator Alpha Trion ended up taking him in so he could keep functioning as a prime. It'd be a shame to lose such a talented bot. And with the whole threat of lovecraftian madness looming over his head, he pours his whole spark into following his every order.

Bumblebee is not a Prime, nor is he even particularly religious (even though his boss has a god that's taken up residence in his head) but for reasons nobody can quite seem to decipher, Primus absolutely loves the little gremlin, which manifests as Bumblebee having impossibly good luck.

There's not a situation he can't fling himself into headfirst and wildly intoxicated that he can't come out of with barely a scratch. It's actually given him a pretty warped perception of the war and hardship in general. He really wants everyone to just stop worrying so damn much. Everything always works out in the end, right? So why does everyone gotta be so grouchy all the time? Especially Prowl.

Prowl cannot fucking stand Bumblebee.

This mostly stems from the fact that the little yellow bastard seems 100% intent on making him "happy" and refuses to leave him the fuck alone. Prowl is, to put it bluntly, really fucking depressed. Originally, his function was law enforcement, but he became quickly disillusioned with the job when he realized just how corrupt the Praxus police force really was. When he quit, he felt he lost his purpose, stuck living with nothing to make of himself. Joining the Autobots was supposed to fix him, but even though he's started to turn his life around, he can't say he feels much better. He spends most of his time holed up in his quarters, either maintaining the team's weaponry or just binging old datatrax on teletraan-1.

Oh, and ever since he got to Earth and found out about anime, he's gotten to be a bit of a weeb

Taking care of the team's medical affairs is Ratchet, and even if he wasn't a massive perfectionist he'd have his work cut out for him. His entire team is prone to making stupid, reckless decisions that end in somebody getting disassembled somehow. Their erratic, chaotic behavior makes his processor ache just thinking about it. Unfortunately Ratchet is pretty paranoid, and generally unable to think about anything other than how wrong everything can go all the time.

He typically tries to put forward a very straight laced, very orderly image of himself, but it's a bit difficult to keep up that demeanor when the overthinking spiral takes him. And nobody makes him spiral quite like Wheeljack.

Wheeljack is generally just here to blow shit up and do some Weird Science. Typically this results in Jackie himself getting blown apart with whatever he's trying to explode, but he had a blocker installed for most of his pain sensors ages ago, so he doesn't mind too much. Especially not when there's a top notch medic he loves to annoy that can put him back together when that happens.

And when the good doctor gets completely tired of his shit, he's got his good buddy and lab partner Bulkhead to help him out too.

Bulkhead is a sensitive type, and largely considered to be the voice of reason on the team. Unfortunately, he often has trouble making his voice heard to begin with. He tends to be pretty quiet and really bad at voicing his thoughts, especially when those thoughts are about something that stresses him out. Given he works with Wheeljack, it's a miracle he isn't nonverbal entirely.

He loves his friend, he really does, but it gets frustrating seeing him get blown apart so often Bulkhead worries for his safety because Wheeljack seems to be incapable of worrying about his own. It's pretty easy for him to get caught up in Ratchet's overthinking episodes with his own anxiety until someone snaps them both out of it

How all of them have managed to survive this long, let alone nearly win the war, is anyone's guess.

[Apparently I just hit the image limit so I'll do the cons in a reblog lmao]

[harventheblorbo]

Hi,I really like your work.So can I get a fanfic about optimus prime with a human reader,where the reader is struggling with the fact that optimus chose jack over them to guard the key to vector sigma.(optimus is the guardian of the reader and the reader blames mostly themselves for being too weak and regretting every past traumatic experience they shared with optimus.They dont blame jack or optimus.)The reader tries to hide it bcs they dont want to embarrass themselves(as they see it) any further in front of optimus,but the thoughts that everyone dislikes them creep up again and so they become distant and try to make themselves very quiet/serious(they think of everyone as an enemy who finds them annoying again).

Also optimus reaction to that,what would he do?But in general angst with comfort(maybe an explanation as to why optimus didnt chose them).

Sorry if its too long or something doesnt fit the rules of the blog(couldnt find them😂)

One shot of TFP Optimus with a reader that can't understand why Optimus choose jack to guard the key of vector Sigma and not them!

Containing; Optimus Prime

___ is gender neutral and human

Warning; Angst, and swearing.

One shot Summary; ___ can't wrap their head around that Optimus picked Jack to protect the key to vecter sigma but some special bot notices.

When Optimus gave Jack the Key, my heart shattered. Why? Why was I so upset that Optimus gave Jack the key? Was it because maybe I thought that Optimus thought as me as too weak? I couldn't blame him if he did.

I didn't wanna ask Optimus because I was just too embarrassed. What if he got too nervous to tell me and told a lie? I mean I don't think he would but still it kinda hurts. I mean there has to be a reasonable explanation. I put my pencil down and closed my notebook. My therapist had been recommending that I should do journaling so I can have my head clear.

I mean it worked a little bit. But to be honest I think it just made me seem more awkward. The Video game buzzed and I heard Jack and Raf exclaim how the other cheated. It was a 2006 game that Ratchet bought so I doubt that Raf would know how to hack it anyway. Miko tapped me on the shoulder.

"Hey ___, do you by chance have the answer for number 3 on our homework?" Miko asked as she sat down next to me with her homework. "Yeah, it's 8" I replied. To be honest, I haven't been feeling the best recently and felt tired.

"Thank you!" She yipped and ran off after writing the answer down. I did anything to help them as I thought I was responsible to do it since Jack had to do it all the time. But to be honest, I think my whole life is going to shit

But I don't wanna really bring it up to someone. What if I burden them? And who would be the right person to talk to it about it? Ratchet is always so grumpy and would brush me off. Arcee would just ask me to go away or something like that. Bulk head is too nice and I think I would overwhelm him. Ultra Magnus wouldn't be the best to go to for anything. So for now, I just keep quiet. Like I always have.

As the days pass, I realize how distant they have been with me. But then again Ive been distant with them and I think it's for the better. No one has really been talking to me. And whenever they do, its awkward and uncomfortable and small.

I don't really care anymore. I don't care about anything anymore. I can't tell if I'm pissed off or just pissed at my self for being a fuckin fool. I guess I was too late to realize when Optimus was more or less observing me throughout the week until I saw him walk up to the risen area for the humans.

"___? Is it alright if I have a word with you?" I heard Optimus's voice and looked up at him. His optics whirred a little bit and saw how focused he was. "Sure... What's up?" I replied. There was no one around so It was a perfect timing. "I'm sure I can speak on behalf of everyone and say that we are worried for you ___" There was brief science. I nodded to let him continue talking. "You've been distant to everyone. Even the children and it's worrying us. Tell me what's wrong. Please" Optimus leaned a little bit forward as I walked up to where he was.

"Well to be honest, I've been upset about the fact that you chose to give Jack the key..." I explained with a upset tone. Im honestly embarrassed to even be saying these words. I can feel my hands sweat as I fidget with my fingers.

Optimus blinked and pondered on what he was going to say. "I see now." He remarked. "Your wondering why I gave Jack the key and not you, I'm I correct?" Optimus asked. I couldn't do anything but nod my head. "___, the only reason I chose Jack to protect it was because Arcee asked me to." He explained. "Oh..." I quietly stated.

I kinda chuckled. "Well thanks for clearing it up" I thanked him as I looked at him fully while I scratched the back of my head a little. He simply nodded with a slight smile.

[agentsquirrelsgotrobots]

In a transformers-to-humans au:

The rescue bots didn't have time to flinch before the relic activated.

Heatwave came back to consciousness to Dani putting stitches in the neck of a screaming and wriggling nine year old, the painkillers clearly working a little too well on the struggling boy.

"Kid! Kid, stop, you are going to drown in your own blood if you don't stop moving. Dad, help me. Kade, check on the bots."

Kade offered Heatwave- a hand? And he took it, noting his now brown skin. Brown was the wrong word for it, but all he could think of to describe it was food names, and that wouldn't go over well with the audience of this fic. Anyway, Heatwave was now Hispanic with salt and pepper hair, and Blades is an aged up version of his canon holoform. Please don't murder the author over the character descriptions. He's the color of boiled chicken and can't describe a human being to save his life.

Chase was white with black hair and blue eyes, and Boulder was also white with grayish brown hair and a big smile. There, all the information you need, now let's move back to the boy vomiting up blood all over Dani.

Surprise, the boy had, in fact, started vomiting up blood that he had previously swallowed. He had also started to claw at Charlie, who was pinning him to Blades's stretcher so the gash in his neck could be sutured and stitched shut. On Charlie's orders, Graham removed a sedative from Dani's medical bag and handed it to her. She stepped back from the stretcher, measured out a low dose, and injected it into the boy's thigh.

After a few more seconds of thrashing, the boy relaxed, and Charlie stepped away from the stretcher and helped Kade with the transformed Rescue Bots. Miraculously, the vehicle modes were separated from the new humans, and the former Bots were all unharmed but confused.

Luckily, the town was cued into the alien thing, so this fic won't be a nightmare to write.

Blades, who were the last to wake up, rushed to Dani's side. "Dani, what can we do?"

"The laceration missed all major arteries but shredded the vocal chords. As much as I hate using chemical restraints, having dad help me was making him even more distressed, and his vitals were already not great. He's stable now, and you can keep an eye on him while I fly the helicopter back to the mainland." Dani had gotten the stretcher into the helicopter while she was talking, getting into the pilot's seat.

A very tired sounding Optimus redirected Dani to a military base near the Canadian border. There, she wasn't surprised to see Ratchet's alt mode and a grumpy human that looked exactly as you would expect a humanized Ratchet to look like.

An old white man with red glasses and graying ginger hair, with a five year old white boy that was dressed as if he had stepped away from a NASCAR pit crew, minus the dirt and stains, clinging to his lab coat. Ratchet had track marks in his elbows, a leftover from his brief experiments with Syth-en. Smokescreen was shaking, a very patient June crouched next to him, trying to convince him to let Ratchet go.

Ultra Magnus had none of it, the man pulling him away with a yank on his shoulder. His military general dress uniform was impeccably clean, though Miko wiped her sticky, powder sugar-coated hands on the tail of his jacket before handing Smokescreen a jelly glazed one. Apparently, they had stopped for Dunkin Donuts.

Ultra Magnus ran a hand through his short black hair, bemoaning Smokescreen's longer cut. They could have easily passed for father and son, and now that the author thinks about it, Chase looked a lot like Magnus too...

That's besides the point, Bumblebee is nine and was puking blood ten minutes ago.

Optimus picked the former bot now identified as Bumblebee up and carried him into Unit E's military hospital, careful to make sure that Bee's head was angled in a way that he wouldn't choke if more blood came up.

The doctors confirmed Dani's theory, and besides a neck brace and some pain medication, there was nothing they could do to repair the boy's vocal chords.

Bee woke up in a hastily thrown together bedroom, Optimus waking up at the sound of Bee's strained gurgle, pink tinged drool trailing down his neck. Optimus wiped it away and sat him up, where he threw up nothing but bile. June came in with some water and rubbed Bumblebee's back while he drank in small sips. Luckily, he kept it down well enough to try some food from June's bag, which he gobbled down eagerly with his medicine.

"The Decepticons are human too." Optimus said. "I am shipping out tonight with some Marines to kill him. If I want to keep him and Smokescreen in our care, I have to go. Bee, hopefully I will see you in two weeks. If not, Fowler will help to get you and Smokescreen into good foster homes." Bumblebee reached for a hug, and Optimus wrapped him in one, pulling the hood over his cleaned and returned cat-eared yellow hoodie. Bee smiled, and June pulled out two somethings she had picked up for him when she went shopping for Smokescreen and Bee.

Bee snatched the Minecraft bee plush as if he was afraid June would take it back, burying his face in the soft plush, a goofy smile on his face.

"And, I have something else too. I was talking with some of the medical staff, and we decided that this might be the best option for the time being." June pulled out a tablet in a blue case. "Bee, this tablet has a special software package called an AAC. Through it, it has thousands of words programed into it that you can use to speak without speaking. Of course, if you want to learn and use sign language, that is completely up to you, and we can arrange that. But, for now, this might make communication easier if you are up to using it. It's also a normal cheap kids tablet, so if you decide you don't like it, I can take the software off, and you can use it like an iPad."

"Yes. Want. Will learn. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Crap. Vagina. Stomach. " Clearly, Bumblebee liked it.

"June, why the swear words and organs?" Optimus asked.

"The software isn't able to be age locked, and it's not like Bumblebee doesn't know what those words mean."

"Yeah, you're right." Optimus got up and left to get packed up to ship out to the downed Nemesis.

Spoiler alert, assassinations are a lot easier when sniper rifles are an option. The war was over in literally three gunshots. Optimus had a laugh over Predaking being turned into a Great Dane wearing a harness with foam butterfly wings. He fell asleep on Optimus's feet on the way back to base, the Burns being gifted a very big lapdog.

Fowler arranged for the purchase of a big old house on Griffin Rock for Ratchet, Optimus, and Bumblebee, who were very happy to live out their old gay couple and adopted son dreams on an island where nobody even batted an eye at them.

Chase took in Smokescreen and Strongarm, who oddly enough was fifteen, a seventeen year old Sideswipe staying with a forty year old Grimlock at the junkyard.

Ultra Magnus joined the military as a strategist, Wheeljack as a ballistics expert.

Breakdown and Knockout opened a luxury auto body shop.

Arachnid, unsurprisingly, continued being a horrifying serial killer and is still at large to this day, though she is buried behind Knockout's auto body shop after she tried to kill Breakdown yet again.

Also, Knockout did give Arcee Arachnid's skull and hands as trophies, but if anyone asks, Optimus definitely doesn't know about it and certainly doesn't have Megatron's brain in a jar in his closet.

[autobots-and-their-crazy-kids]

Unpopular Transformers Opinion, but I think that despite TFA’s flaws... It handled most its characters better then TFP did! 

TFA Optimus, Bumblebee and Bulkhead have actual personalities, unlike their TFP Counterparts. 

TFA Optimus and Bee both have strengths and flaws, thus making them more interesting characters! 

TFP Optimus is seen as this stoic, perfect bot that is always right (even when he’s wrong) and TFP Bee’s whole thing is that he the ‘rookie’ of the team, he likes Raf (for understanding his beeps for some reason) and is sad that he can’t talk anymore. (Even though the other Autobots can understand his beeps.) 

I know that TFP Bee can only beep and it’s not his fault that we don’t know his true personality, but TFA Bee still wins. 

TFA Bulkhead was tired of being seen as a big, clumsy idiot that destroys things, so he becomes an artist and a repair bot to create/fix things instead.  

TFP Bulkhead has similar insecurities, but nothing is ever done about it and this problem is forgotten later. 

You couldn’t have given him a different hobby? 

You couldn’t have made him an architect or nature lover, like TFA Prowl was? 

Also, TFP Bulkhead’s main traits are being a pushover and being hesitant to rescue people that are jerky (even if they aren’t evil)... which aren’t great traits to remember a heroic character.  

TFA Ratchet and TFP Ratchet are similar (also TFP Ratchet is my fav of the TFP Autobots), but I like TFA Ratchet a little bit more, cause TFP Ratchet was a bit racist against humans/organics... 

TFA Ratchet was grumpy with everyone including the humans, but he’s more angry that the human fans won’t leave him alone sometimes, instead of just being angry with their existence in general like in TFP (Ratchet actually has more reasons to hate humans in TFA, then in TFP! XD)... 

TFA Arcee is basically more like a plot device then an actual character, but I still like her more then in TFP... Why?... Well, TFA Arcee’s personality is more like in G1; meaning that she’s kind and has an almost motherly personality. Also, despite being a damsel-in-distress in Ratchet’s flashback, she’s very brave and intelligent (she was a teacher once); she stays calm despite losing her leg during a battle and getting captured by Lockdown and she’s willing to give up all her memories, so the Decepticons wouldn’t get the knowledge in her mind and the Autobots would win the war. She’s also probably very trustworthy and badass, considering that she was trusted with this knowledge in the first place and she wasn’t shown with any bodyguards near her...so she was probably battling Decepticons and delivering the info all by herself, until she lost her leg... And she managed to find a hiding place away from the Decepticons with only one leg, until Ratchet found her, which is still pretty impressive... 

No offense to TFP Arcee, but she basically acts like a female version of Ratchet sometimes. She can be quite grumpy and strict. There’s nothing wrong with female characters like that, but Ratchet is already the grumpy bot and he does it better... Why couldn’t they make Arcee a stoic nature-lover, like TFA Prowl? The TFP Creators already copied the TFA Bots and gave Prowl’s motorcycle mode to Arcee, so they might as well go all the way! 

Or why couldn’t they give TFP Arcee a motherly personality, like the other Arcees? A female character can be motherly and still be badass! It would’ve been a great way to balance out the ‘dark’ parts of the TFP Series! Also, Arcee and June would get along instantly and probably become BFFs! 

Sari Sumdac isn’t perfect and I have conflicted feelings over her future techno-organic stuff as well as her overpowered Allspark Key (because on one hand it’s awesome, but on the other hand it feels like the TFA Creators are trying too hard to make Sari better than the other human allies, also her being a cyborg somewhat ruins the specialness of her friendship with the Autobots... because she’s one of them, instead of a complete human)... 

But Sari is still one of the better main human characters, despite her being a walking dues-ex-machina or plot device sometimes (both Sari and her father Prof. Sumdac have been done dirty in TFA, for different reasons)... 

Like TFA Optimus and the other characters, she has strengths, flaws and an actual personality... 

And Sari is definitely better than all the main humans in TFP combined:

Both Sari and Raf are dues-ex-machinas sometimes... but again Sari has a proper personality to balance herself out, while Raf is just the quiet and genius stereotype that loves being helpful. 

Both Sari and Miko are adventurous and energetic girls, but can also be immature and childish brats... But the difference between them is that Sari is only a brat sometimes and it usually involves her overpowered key and Sari gets cut some slack because she’s a little kid, however Miko is a 15-year old teenager and yet is somehow even more bratty then 7-year old Sari and Miko can’t even use an overpowered key as an excuse. (Sari also has fashion sense.)

Both Sari and Jack are considered the ‘Chosen Ones’... but again, Sari has a proper personality and fashion sense... Jack was supposed to be the ‘leader’ of the human team, but he rarely feels like a leader (Cody from Rescue Bots was a better leader then him and Cody is younger than Jack)... He’s also supposed to be the ‘Sane One’ that doesn’t want to be part of the Cybertron War’s craziness, which is interesting to see, but only lasts for like a day... 

TFA Megatron is an intelligent and surprisingly civilized Decepticon as well as one of the saner Megatrons (which results in almost every Decepticon being crazy and making him silently suffer for it)... 

TFP Megatron was trying too hard to become the ‘evilest’ Megatron, that he ends up looking like an idiot half the time! TFP Megatron is probably one of the dumbest Megatrons (in my opinion)... Dude thought that stabbing a shard of frozen evil god blood in his spark was a great idea! And he almost destroyed himself, without Starscream’s help! (Starscream only needed to cut off his life support!)  

TFA Starscream rivals G1 Starscream in feral craziness (but TFA was a bit smarter at first, with his Megatron betraying plans)! 

TFP Starscream, I have conflicted feelings for... On one hand he was such a badass during the starter episodes, but then TFP makes him more and more wimpy/cowardly over time, on the other hand I feel kinda bad for him because he was actually a decent leader (he helped the Decepticons harvest energon, without the Autobots or humans seeing them for 3 years) and he actually cares about the Decepticons’ survival at first... He probably wouldn’t have tried to betray/end Megatron if Megatron (or anyone) had showed him a little respect/gratitude or Megatron didn’t attack/yell at Starscream over every little thing! 

The first time TFP Megatron beats up Starscream, Starscream was actually trying to help the Decepticons by attempting to get information on the Autobots (and he almost got it)! 

Then Megatron pretends that he’s gonna destroy Starscream to scare the poor flier, just because Starscream missed mining out some energon (or was hiding it for himself)... 

Why does Starscream deserve to be attacked for those things? 

As for Soundwave... Okay, I’ll let TFP have that one. 

TFA Soundwave is okay and I like the concept of him being a kid’s toy... But I feel like they could’ve done more with him! And I feel like Bumblebee should’ve been his rival instead of Bulkhead, since Bumblebee is actually the jealous-type... or maybe Bee and Bulkhead share the Soundwave Rivalry! (Also, the TFA episode ‘Human Error’ was a mistake...) 

Meanwhile, TFP Soundwave is the most badass and competent villain in all of TFP! 

It literally took banishing him to another dimension to defeat him! 

Plus, he actually looks like a demon! 

[just-a-random-transformers-nerd]

Yes head cannons :) Transformers Prime addition.

Optimus Prime

Realistic Headcannon: He's witnessed a Lot of near-death experiances and deaths of his companions. He is younger then Megatron but taller than him. back when he was Orion Pax he had Super long legs (Man never missed leg day)

Funny Ha Ha Headcannons that make no sense but are true because I said So: Although Megatron is shorter than optimus he teases optimus for being Younger "Ha Ha little baby Man"

"I am literally taller than you"

".... lil bby Man"

He gets small toys for bumblebee

Very not Ha Ha funny but extreamly sad depresso boi hours Heandcannons: he has alot of built up emotions such as stress, anxiety, anger, sadness, etc. So when he is alone he Just kind of finds a dark corner and sits with his knees up to his chassis and kind of half shuts down. all of his lights are dimed down and he sits there motionless overthinking everything.

not realistic Headeannons but are true Bc I said so: optimus and Megatron are siblings :) He does not care for the human holidays and despises halloween.

BumbleBee

Realistic Headcannon: he is technically a cadet. his Voice box is So fragile it breaks all the time and pisses off Ratchet because it happens like every five seconds.

Funny Ha Ha Headcannons that make no sense but are true because I said So: the actual little baby man. he is secretly friend with Megatron. innocent but knows how to get away with murder. Very against drinking. Pregnant women mood swings, he plays podcasts from the radio but every swear word is bleeped out.

Very not Ha Ha funny but extreamly sad depresso boi hours Heandcannons: whenever he is sad he latches onto his teammates (mostly optimus) and does not let go. Ratchet hates this. He cries a lot too.

not realistic Headeannons but are true Bc I said so: he is smol bby Man. He is very fascinated with human cultures and holidays. He often makes the autobots celebrate and decorate the base with props.

Ratchet

Realistic Headcannon: Grumpy old medic. Only tolerates everyone except Optimus. He thinks bumblebee is too much of a baby. Hates the deceptions for injuring his teammates so he has to fix the ones he tolerates. He leaves the patients that he really doesn't like with minor inconveniences. Against swearing but swears himself.

Funny Ha Ha Headcannons that make no sense but are true because I said So: he secretly takes synthetic energon before battles, but he's addicted to it. Normaly he doesn't like fighting but when he's on synthetic energon he loves it. When bee is in his sad boi hours and attaches to Ratchets leg he kicks him off like a dog.

Very not Ha Ha funny but extreamly sad depresso boi hours Heandcannons: he overworks himself all the time he rarely ever recharges and drinks an unhealthy amount of energon coffee.  He never talks about his problems. He works continuously to forget about his problems but unfortunately it adds more problems. Dealing with bumblebee makes his stress worse. He thinks mental pain is the same thing as physical pain so he tries to find physical antidotes for his feelings.

not realistic Headeannons but are true Bc I said so and they are funny: he is half Optimus size but taller than bumblebee. He hates nicknames like doc, absolutely hates it when WheelJack calls him sunshine. He secretly has a list of   bots that he hates with the reasons why as well.

That's it for now. I'm tired ╥﹏╥

[weenwrites]

TFP Autobots W/ a Jokester Reader

Pairing - Platonic, Romantic ( Up to reader interpretation) Category - Headcanons, Scenarios Trigger Warnings - None, (Deez nuts)

Optimus

Final exams were never too fun, and the stress that came with them made you all the more miserable. You tapped your pencil against your head as you carefully read through the textbook you’ve been staring at for… Two? Maybe three hours now? While you’ve lost track of time, a certain prime hadn’t.

“Y/N, have you eaten or slept properly as of lately?” Optimus began, drawing your attention to the bot you didn’t know was even there.

“Huh? Oh uh… No, not really.” You reply, taking a moment to close your stinging eyes.

“Why have you neglected your health?” He asks gently, bringing you a small tray of food and water with utmost care.

You presume that the tray was kindly put together by the kids before they left, or perhaps Optimus used a pair of tweezers to fix you a meal. You chuckled slightly at the thought of the big bot using a couple of tools to do such a thing.

“I’ve been working on studying for my…” You pause.

You’ve been nothing but bored, tired, and stressed for the past few hours, you figured that a bit of humor couldn’t hurt and so why not try to pull a joke?

“My E-10 exams.” You continue, setting the pencil down as you open your eyes again, blinking a couple times. “They’re worth half my grade.”

“Hm, you are approaching the end of a school semester, and Raf, Jack, and Miko have expressed the importance of final examinations before.” Optimus thinks aloud. “Although grades are important for your future, please keep in mind that your well being is important as well. I hope that you succeed on your E-10 examinations.”

“… E-10 deez nuts.”

(Encase you don’t get it, say E-10 aloud. It sounds like “eatin’.”)

He finds your jokes strange, but he’s happy that they bring you joy. He doesn’t understand them, though, but he can grasp the concept of the joke if you take the time to explain it to him. Much to everyone’s surprise, Optimus smiled at your jokes once. Once!!! Magnus is in disbelief, he couldn’t and still can’t believe that Optimus smiled at your joke. Your joke. Your profane idea of a joke of all things! On the other hand, you got Optimus to smile, he rarely smiles! That’s pretty awesome!

Ratchet

You strode around the platform, pretending to look for something you never lost just to pull a joke on the resident grumpy medic, who happened to be busy repairing his tools.

“Ratchet, do you know where Grabon is?” You begin, looking toward him. “I misplaced it somewhere around base.”

“No.” Ratchet replies, not even taking his gaze off of his work. “What are you talking about?”

“You know… Grabon.” You reply, still as vague as before. “Have you seen it?”

“Have you tried searching in your bag?” He asks, taking utmost care to weld the tool back together. “I’m a bit busy at the moment—can’t you go ask someone else to help you search for it?”

“Yeah, but it isn’t there and I’ve already asked everyone else. Are you sure you haven’t seen it?”

With a sigh, he replies. “I don’t know what a grabon is—“

“Grabon deez nuts.”

No. NEVER make another joke like that around him AGAIN. He hates your jokes too. He now probably refuses to talk to you if you get him more than once in a single day, unless he has to. He’ll be more mindful of what he says in reply to your question or statement.

Ultra Magnus

The base is completely empty. Optimus and Ratchet happened to be out on a mission together, the kids and their respective guardians are all out on patrol, and Smokescreen and Wheeljack had just left to train in another hangar. You and Ultra Magnus were the only two in the area and for a while you stood in complete silence until you broke it.

“Well… Looks like it’s just you, me, and mifat.” You say with a sigh, planting your hands/servos on your hips as you cast him a glance.

“Mifat?” The officer repeats, his gaze now on you. “Who is mifat?”

“Mifat nuts.” You smirk. “You are so easy to get.”

He hates your jokes. He hates your jokes so very much. Magnus deems your jokes to be highly inappropriate and disrespectful. If he hears you catch Optimus or any other higher rank with a “deez nuts joke,” he’ll give you a 2 hour lecture on why you should NOT do that. He falls for your jokes every single time and Wheeljack never lets him live it down. It’s safe to say he absolutely hates it here. You are ONE more reason he’ll look forward to leaving Earth, if that time ever comes, that is… Or unless you’re Cybertronian, then he hopes to see the day that he does not have to order you around anymore. He most definitely will never talk to you again unless he HAS to.

Bulkhead

“Bulk, you were asking about where I went yesterday, yeah?” You query as you strode alongside him through the dense coniferous forest.

You fold your hands/servos behind your back, walking along rather cheerily as you stick close to him. Miko sits perched like a bird on Bulkhead’s shoulder as he closely monitors a scanner’s readings. The three of you were out on a simple, harmless, recon mission. Bulkhead only brought a scanner in hopes to find an energon signal that’d eventually lead him to a mine.

“Yeah, I haven’t seen you all day.” Bulkhead replies with a nod, his gaze lingering on the scanner for a few seconds before he looks to you. “No one else had either.”

“I was at Y-M-H.” You reply, trying your hardest to suppress your laughter.

“What?” The bot replies, clearly confused. He thinks about every known location he knows of before replying. “Y-M-H?”

“Yo mama’s house.” You retort with a smug smirk, leaving him baffled beyond belief.

Miko’s jaw drops as she whips around to look at you. She exchanges a glance with Bulkhead, a grin slowly spreading across her face as he only grew more and more befuddled as the two of you only laughed.

But… He… Doesn’t have a mom? He isn’t… What?? HUH??? He is nothing but confused until Miko explains the joke. Even then he doesn’t really get your sense of humor at all, but ok! If it makes you happy and does no harm then, he’s fine with it. Whenever you get another bot with a deez nuts joke, he is STILL confused. Like sure, keep doing it if it makes you happy, but do NOT try to get Ultra Magnus, please.

Wheeljack

Humming contentedly to yourself, you lean against the wall at the base as the other bots roll straight into base after a successful mission. However when a certain reckless wrecker comes skidding to a halt within the base and transforming, you quickly jump to your pedes and wave to him.

“Hey! Hey Wheeljack!” You call out.

“Eh? Hey, Y/N!” The wrecker replies, spinning around to look at you.

“Dee wanted me to tell you they said hi!” You explain as he takes a couple of simple and long strides over to you.

“Oh, Dee?” He repeats as you nod. “Is that a friend of your’s or somethin’?”

“Deez nuts!” You retort smugly. “Ha! Gottem.”

What the frag have you done. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? Great job you’ve taught him about deez nuts jokes. He uses deez nuts jokes on Magnus ALL the time, sometimes on Ratchet, but mostly on Magnus. He also finds them hilarious, mostly whenever someone falls for them. Magnus hates you.

Bumblebee

A massive, bright, swirling portal of ghostly greens and pale neon blues split open in the air. You and Bee stepped out from the portal and examined your surroundings as the portal closed in on itself. You were dropped off in a mountainous region with gray clouds that rolled overhead. The mountains were covered in multiple amber or bright yellow trees, and whenever a gust of wind swept by, you’d notice a multitude of crisp leaves were swept up in the breeze.

“Hey, Bee did you bring the paradee?” You ask, looking to the yellow bot as the two of you began walking, “It’s really important.”

Bumblebee returned a confused glance along with a couple beeps and buzzes. He raises an optical ridge, prompting you to continue.

“Yeah, the paradee.” You nod. “Didn’t Optimus tell you anything about it before we left?”

The scout narrowed his optics, trying to recall if anyone mentioned something called a paradee. Did they mention something, and he just forgot about it? Maybe he wasn’t paying proper attention? But that was unlikely. He always paid attention! You said the paradee was important to the mission, really important. Was he going to jeopardize your mission because he forgot something called a paradee? He let out a couple distressed beeps and buzzes and only watched as you shot him a glance from behind your shoulder.

“Paradeez nuts.” You simply smirked.

You made him panic a bit, there… But he was relieved that it was just a joke in the end. He tries not to fall for your jokes, but he doesn’t really care if he falls for one anyway. Expect to hear a couple giddy beeps that somewhat resemble laughter or giggles whenever he hears someone fall for your jokes.

Arcee

With her optics set on the broad mountain range in front of you two, she hardly notices as you begin to worriedly rummage through your bag. As a result, she nearly walks off without you while you zip your bag shut and slip it back over your shoulders before suddenly speaking up.

“Arcee, wait! Wait! I forgot my fermented succondese back at base!” You exclaim, drawing her gaze toward you.

“Your what?” She questions. “You’ve forgotten your what back at base?”

“Fermented succondese. Didn’t you hear me?

“I did, but what’s fermented succondese—” The motorcycle questions.

“Fermented succondese nuts!” You exclaim.

She stares at you, narrowing her bright blue optics, anything but amusement on her face, all the while you’re smiling smugly, rather proud of yourself for that joke. With a groan, she turns around, back now facing you.

“Har har, very funny.” Arcee replies sarcastically. “Now come on, we have a mission.” She rolls her optics, beginning to walk away while you continue to smile.

She isn’t amused. Not one bit.

Cliffjumper

“So humans really eat those?” Cliffjumper queried.

The two of you were just cruising down a normal patrol route, the dry red desert zooming right by as country music faintly played in the background. You were seated in the front passenger seat, looking toward the radio where his voice emanated from as you nod.

“Yeah, and the worst part is that not many people really know what hotdogs are made of.” You nod in reply, trying not to gag in disgust at how Jack eats those so cluelessly. Human cuisine was truly a mix of wonderful genius and disgusting goop.

“That is naasty.” Cliffjumper cringed.

“Yeah and—“ You pause as a sudden idea hits you.

You just happened to know a joke regarding a certain spaghetti brand. As a sly smile slowly crept up onto your face, you lean back in his seat and look away.

“There’s this one spaghetti brand—it’s pretty good—it’s called Chef Boyardee.” You explain, watching as his rear-view mirrors adjust themselves to look at you.

“Chef Boyardee, huh?” He replies, swerving around the bend in the road.

“Yeah.” You nod. “Chef boy-are-deez nuts tasty!”

He finds it pretty hilarious whenever someone falls for one of your deez nuts jokes, or joe mama jokes. He might’ve memorized a couple of them to use on his fellow teammates, actually. He doesn’t constantly bother the others with jokes like Smokescreen or Wheeljack would, he uses them sparingly and when it’s appropriate to do so. So no one really minds, besides he actually gets a smile or a chuckle out of people rather than a drawn out, tired groan. If you’re human, he’ll teach you the Cybertronian equivalent of a deez nuts joke, or basically just exchange jokes in general. You’ll teach him Earth humor and jokes, and he’ll teach you the Cybertronian equivalent!

Smokescreen

Sure stake-out missions weren’t exactly the “funnest” to be on, but they were necessary in order to properly investigate whatever the Decepticons were doing at some random power plant. In this case you and Smokescreen were teamed together, and for the past few hours you were eying the building, waiting for the Decepticons to make a move.

“What’re you looking at?” Smokescreen pipes up, drawing your attention away from whatever it was you were staring at. “The power plant’s over there, you know.”

“Yeah yeah I do…” You retort with a wave of your servo.

The boredom was eating away at the two of you, and you were just hoping that something interesting would at least lighten the situation. But you’ve been waiting for hours now, and that moment never came, and so why not make something amusing happen yourself? With a devious smirk slightly creeping up on your faceplate, you cast him a brief glance before looking away.

“Have you ever heard of the news in Kenya today?” You ask.

“No? What’s the news in Kenya about?” Smokescreen asks.

Your smirk widens at how easy it was to trick the poor rookie.

“Is it the ‘cons?” The clueless bot continues.

“Oh I’ll tell you all about it… But first, Kenya fit deez nuts in yo mouth?”

Mere seconds after those words left your intake, his doorwings droop as his optics round in shock. Smokescreen very well understand what he’s just fallen for and he feels completely and utterly stupid for falling your joke all the while you’re getting a good laugh out of it.

Well he’s not too happy whenever he falls for your jokes but apart from that… What have you done. You’ve taught him about deez nuts jokes and now he’ll be using them on his team and the cons all the time now. He feels so smug whenever he gets someone with a deez nuts joke. He has the SMUGGEST expression on his faceplate, he feels so proud of himself whenever someone falls for it. He actually got Megatron once, and the warlord wasn’t too happy with it. Smokescreen nearly smiled for a fusion canon blast to the head, but he’d say it was worth it. Why? Why did you do this? Are you proud of yourself?

[local-spoon-does-a-thing]

Sickness

[(Bayverse) Optimus Prime x Reader]

A/N: Here’s some more Papa Bot fic. Should I make a bonus ending/part about them arriving at the gas station or some shit like that? Also this fic got out of hand and idk how it ended up like this. Hope you enjoy!

“Ugh...hey, Optimus? Can you roll down the window? I need some fresh air.” You mumbled out and leaned your head against the door. For some reason, you felt sick to the core. That’s probably because you were, in fact, sick. Perhaps it was something you ate for dinner yesterday? You did have a rough night trying to sleep. But at this moment, you just wanted to jump out of the moving vehicle, lay on the side of the road, and perish. Your stomach was not agreeing with you at all and begged you to purge out whatever was in it. Once the window was rolled down, you immediately poked your head out and took in a deep breath. Ah, that was much better. But that still didn’t get that sickening feeling out of your stomach. Maybe a nice bottle of water would help cure you. Your hand moved towards where the cup holders would be located and attempted to grab a bottle of water. Though, there was nothing. Looking back, you saw that you didn’t even bring water with you. Oh, right, you’ve forgotten. Earlier when Ratchet had suggested that you bring a couple bottles of water for the trip, you refused and reassured him that you were fine when in reality, you were just too lazy to carry them. In defeat, your hand flopped back down and you poked your head out once more.

Currently, you and the team were traveling to another city in a different state, as it was stated that there were some Decepticon sightings located there. This was going to be your first mission with them and after countless of merciless begging to go with them, they finally agreed to let you travel with them. Ratchet and Ironhide thought that it was a horrible idea, Bumblebee was simply ecstatic that you would get to go with them, and Optimus was just too tired to deal with your tantrums like a tired father. Who would’ve thought that out of all the members of the team, you seemed to be the closest with the Autobot leader himself. Anyone else would’ve thought that you two were polar opposites. You were a simple person that liked to joke a lot and showed some signs of arrogance while Optimus was more on the serious and wise side. Little did anyone know that you two balanced each other out. He kept you grounded to reality while you made sure that he would have fun during his time on Earth. Though your adventures with them have just merely started, you can tell that you’ve made an impact on the team. Everyone seemed more on the bright side, even the grumpy medic. They were happy and that was all you’ve ever wanted. However, your stubbornness and pride proved you not to be the easiest person to handle, like now.

“Hey, Optimus? Is there by any chance that you have some water on you? Not that I need it or anything like that. Buuuut... I might need it later.”

The old ‘Bot let out a heavy sigh and the whole truck rumbled along with him. “Didn’t Ratchet tell you earlier in the morning to bring your bottles of water? We’ve said it repeatedly that this would be a long trip-”

“Okay, okay! I get it, I was just asking in case you did have them. No need to go full on mother-mode.” You cut him off mid-sentence before crossing your arms across your chest and slumping into the seat. Moments passed by and your hands dropped down to your stomach and clutched the fabric that was in the way. Okay, you seriously needed to do something about this. You felt nauseous and each second that passed by was torturous. You wanted to tell Optimus about your condition, but c’mon, this was your first mission! You had a feeling that if you were to tell him about this, the team wouldn’t bring you to anymore future missions. And the main course hasn’t even started yet since you were still traveling to the destination. But was this really worth the trouble? I mean, even outside of these missions, you would still be seeing them.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you like that, it’s just- I don’t think I’m doing too well. I think I might have the stomach bug or something ‘cause I feel like I’m gonna throw up at any moment.” You half heartedly confessed to him.

At this statement, Optimus had wanted to stop the trip abruptly and check if you were okay. Guess you could say that this was his “mother-mode” or at least close to it. Worried thoughts bubbled into his metal head that he had almost forgotten to respond to you, almost giving you an indication that he was irritated and ignoring you. He would have Ratchet check up on you but then again, he only knew about Cybertronian biology, not human.

“Hang in there, [Y/N]. There’s a gas station approximately three miles from here. We’ll take a rest there and examine you.”

He then went on to accelerate his speed and over the radio, went on to report the other members of the team about your condition. You could hear Bee’s worried buzzing, Ironhide’s sigh, and Ratchet’s grumpy  grumbling of “I told you so” that was directed towards you. In response, you rolled your eyes and laid down across the seats, staring at the truck ceiling. The slight bumpiness on the road was somehow a bit soothing, but it wasn’t enough to put you to sleep. What you needed right now was a distraction. And what distraction was better than you annoying your guardian?

“Oppy.” No response.

“Timus.” No response.

“Hey, Boss Bot!” Finally, you got a response. He let out a surprised sound and you can practically hear the gears in his head turn. 

“What is it?”

“I need you to distract me.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

You were met with silence once again. He was confused with what you wanted. What did you need to be distracted from? You weren’t really doing much other than trying to refrain yourself from puking on him. It didn’t take long for you to notice that he was confused by your request.

“Just...just ask me questions. They can be stupid or not or whatever. I don’t want to focus too much on my nausea.”

“I understand. Very well then. How are your grades in school?”

You groaned and smacked the palms of your hands onto your face. You wanted to answer any other question BUT that one. Okay, so maybe you were lagging a little behind on your subjects than the rest of your classmates, but you could fix it up with a snap of your fingers! Or, that was what you thought. You’ve been so caught up with your alien friends that you didn’t think that school wasn’t as important as saving civilian lives and all that. 

“[Y/N]?” His deep voice pulled you away from your thoughts and you slid your hands down your face.

“It’s uh, it’s going...decent.” Wow, way to make yourself sound believable.

“[Y/N]...” Now there was a stern and serious tone in his voice.

“Don’t worry about it! I got it all under control. Go ahead and ask another question that’s not related at all to school.”

Once again, he let out another heavy sigh. He had a feeling that your reasoning for your grades being “decent” as you say, was because of him. He didn’t want to be the reasoning for you failing classes. What kind of guardian does that? Yes, he has the most fun spending time on you and picking up on your witty jokes, but he knew that if it ever came down to it, he would have to step back and let you focus on things that would matter in the long run. Even when it does break him.

“You need to take your school more seriously, please. You know what will happen if your parents were to find out about your grades dropping, correct? We won’t be able to see each other as much anymore. And as much as I want to be with you, I won’t hesitate to take a couple of steps back.”

That...hurt. You didn’t want to be constantly reminded of the consequences, but that wasn’t what hurt you. The fact that he said that he wouldn’t hesitate gave you a wake up call. You sat up from your lying position and looked at his radio with a panicked and disbelief look. You didn’t know what or how to respond to that. He was serious and you knew that. You looked away in shame and clutched your stomach once more. Optimus then moved his rearview mirror towards your face and saw how you looked. It broke his spark and he wanted to comfort you, but decided not to push further on the subject and change it.

“Is there anything you would like to ask that relates to me?”

You perked up at his question and had a surprised look. Honestly, you didn’t expect that at all and you didn’t even consider asking him questions. If you were to, you had wanted to try to avoid the more sensitive topics that related to the war on his planet and such questions like that.

“Hmm, you know how the Matrix-thingy chooses who the next Prime will be or something like that? Well, what were you like before you became a Prime?”

Like you were, he was caught off-guard by the question. It’s been a long while since he had spoken of his previous life. He felt a faint sense of nostalgia as he reflected on his past self. My, how much he has changed over time. Going from having a simple life to being one of the biggest roles in Cybertron history. If he were not in his vehicle form, he would’ve smiled fondly.

“My previous name was Orion Pax. At certain angles, you could say that I was more like Bumblebee: young and free-spirited. I used to work as a data clerk in Cybertron. My life was quite simple and ordinary before I heard of Megatron and came to a realization that I was not satisfied with what I was doing. That...is all I will tell for now.”

“Aww, what?! Come on, you can’t leave me hanging like that! What happened with you and Megatron? Pleaaase!”

“Some other time, tiny girl. Now, it is my turn to ask a question. Do you know what my favorite color is?”

Okay, now you were confused. Why would he go from asking a serious question to suddenly asking about his favorite color. Out of all the things he could’ve asked, he went for that one. Of course, it’s not like you were going to back down from something as simple as that. However, you had to take a moment to think. Did robots have favorite colors? Did they even have time to consider what color was their favorite? You couldn’t figure out what the answer was until suddenly, it hit you!

“Wait a minute, that’s a trick question! You’ve never told me what your favorite color was! You can’t fool me!” You accused as you pointed your finger at his radio. A deep chuckle came from the radio as you guessed right. 

“Clever girl. Well in that case, I might as well tell what my favorite color is. It’s autumn orange. It gives off a warm feeling along with joy whenever I look at it. Just like whenever I look at you. It reminds me of you.”

Your eyes lit up at his words and your cheeks flushed. That...may or may not be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to you. Plus, it sounded very genuine. A warm feeling swirled your insides and a sincere smile danced across your lips. Who knew that an alien from outer space could be one of the most caring people (er- robot) you knew.

“Whoa, I definitely wasn’t expecting that answer. I didn’t know you had a sappy side.” You lightly joke. “But, thank you. That was really nice of you to say. And you should show your sappy side more often.”

“Heh, I’ll think about it.”

You then raised a hand to your mouth and let out a yawn. Optimus was able to catch it and moved his rear view mirror towards you once more.

“Am I boring you already?” He asked in a fake yet barely noticeable betrayed voice. There was a hint of amusement sprinkled onto there.

And you snapped out of your sleepy trance and sat up straight, all alerted. “Wha- no no no! It was just a yawn! I’m not-”

Your words were cut off when you heard laughter from him. Yeah sure, you’ve heard him chuckle before, but an actual laugh coming from him was quite rare. You laughed along with him until it died down.

“Alright, little one. Go on and get some rest. I’ll wake you up once we get to the gas station.”

You lied down along the seats on your back and closed your eyes. As your drowsiness was pulling you into slumber, you heard the radio turn on as lofi music played on a soft volume. Now this was most definitely making you sleepy. Soon enough, you were knocked out. Optimus silently hoped that they could stay like this for at least a very long time. With the both of you in peace, traveling in the middle of nowhere while relaxing lofi hip hop was playing in the background. Yet another moment that he gets to cherish for as long as he gets to live.

[elindae-writes]

Who are your ten favourite tfp characters and why?

1. Starscream

I thinks #1 surprises nobody. He’s my garbage plane son. I just love how complex he is and how even though he’s evil you can tell that he does still have morality and honor. I love villains who are evil but who have standards. I also love how he’s endured so much but continues to push forward. He actually is a very good leader and he kept the Decepticons alive while Megatron was prancing in the stars like a high gazelle.

2. Optimus Prime

ah, yes, the character who is the reason I am now obsessed with Peterbilt trucks. I love how he’s the calm and composed leader character who cares for his team. He’s distant from his team though and that is such an interesting source of conflict. He has an absolutely wild backstory (archivist to eighteen-wheeler, my goodness) with Megatron. I am a sucker for stories about two dudes choosing to be brothers but who then have a rift that opens up between them that inevitably makes them become enemies. I got the sense that one day his habit of bottling his emotions would backfire and make him snap. Characters who are calm bastions of stability who then suddenly snap like twigs are also a favorite of mine.

3. Smokescreen

my son!! He’s such an idiot, I love him. I adore characters who desperately want to become heroes but who only ironically become heroes when they realize that being a hero is not all that it’s cracked up to be. I feel bad for him because some creepy old coot turned him into a living FedEx package and that is straight up Not Cool.

4. Soundwave

I love him because he’s this creepy villain with an interesting personality, character design, and set of abilities. What I most like about him is how he actually does have a morally good reason for his actions (creating a just Cybertron) but is going about achieving his goal in completely the wrong way.

5. Bulkhead

I like how he’s a Gentle Giant kind of character. He is similar to Bumblebee: they’re both characters who are very nice on the outside but who can be brutal when they need to be. I feel bad for him, he loves Miko very much but it seems as if she loves him more for what he is rather than who he is. I wish we’d gotten more Bulkhead episodes.

6. Ratchet

He is very exasperated, tired, and done with everything and I just love that. I like how he’s more loyal to Cybertron than Earth and is skeptical of the humans. It makes sense that not every ‘Bot would fall pede-over-helm in love with Earth. (Which is why it’s so cute when he does show compassion to Earth, such as when he offers to turn his sirens on for Raf). He’s a grumpy uncle to everybody on the entire team. He is 10x time better than the hot steaming pile of garbage that is known as “Alpha Trion”

7. Breakdown

He shows more compassion to the cannon fodder drones than even the heroes of the show, he has a complex personality, and all in all seems like a nice guy. He seems like the kind of guy you would meet in a Walmart aisle and who’d talk to you about his favorite food brands, if that makes sense??

8. Bumblebee

I like how he’s this happy and cheerful bot with a dark side to him. He’s kind of your generic Heroic Main Character but that’s okay, it’s a good look on him. He’s similar to Optimus in that he is the kind of character who you just know is going to snap one day. Which he did!! That scene where he murdered Megatron was fabulous--which is why it was so disappointing Megan got resurrected looking like he was coated in Panko bread crumbs :(

9. Megatron

Yes, Megan is on this list. I love to hate him. He has so much going on for him: he’s high on space crack, is insane, makes questionable choices, is obsessed with fairytales, and is a deeply disturbing dude. I don’t like him as a person, not at all, just as a villain. Every time he did something stupid the song Summer Samba began to play in my head.

10. June Darby

She’s the only real human I actually like. She behaves the most realistically in her circumstances. Parent characters tend to be awful in kid’s shows so June was just fantastic. (I am really looking forward to her debut in the Operation: Bumblebee rewrite in Unburied)

[my-writings-and-musings]

Please ignore this if you've gotten sick of this particular prompt, but may we please get another set of the Oxygen Deprivation scenarios, but this time with Ratchet and Megatron?? Regardless of if you do it or not, thank you for your hard work, I love everything you've written so far!

Thankfully I never tire of drama! I did the prompt for Megatron back in part three, but I've absolutely got some grumpy/caring medic for you! Thank you for taking the time to read my stuff and send in a request, it always makes my day!

Part One: Here!

Part Two: Here!

Part Three: Here!

Part Four: Here!

Part Five: You're Here!

Part Six: Here!

Part Seven: Here!

Part Eight: Here!

Part Nine: Here!

Part Ten: Here!

Part Eleven: Here!

Part Twelve: Here!

Ratchet

·You're in Swerve's with him for a nice evening off, something he enjoys a little more frequently than he used to thanks to the multitude of medics on board, but he appreciates every minute the two of you get to enjoy together regardless. There's hardly a lack of things to discuss, and you often find yourself listening to his stories until the bar closes and he has to carry you to berth. It's a little embarrassing for you, especially with every bot that knows thinking it's the cutest thing they've ever seen, but you admittedly enjoy being with Ratchet too much to care about how it looks. It doesn't hurt that he quite obviously enjoys it as well, especially when he's usually around those who only seek him out if they're sick, and he enjoys that he finally has an enthusiastic audience.

·The two of you are amongst the last of the patrons but still going strong one slow evening, with you perched atop a table whilst the older mech tells a story about a long ago incident in a medical lab where, upon being short staffed due to an ongoing battle, a patient had helpfully assisted with his own surgery. Though you're tired due to the hour, you're more than invested enough to keep your eyes open and listen along in fascination. It's not often he gets to go on like this, after all, and he looks absolutely adorable when he does.

·There's an unexpected flickering of the lights that stops everyone in their place, but it ends just quickly enough for the atmosphere to return to calm and for some bot to crack a joke about Swerve not paying his electric bill. You barely have time to chuckle before the whole ship is rocked like a boat on the open ocean, sending engex flying and glass shattering as everything not nailed down is tossed without a care, yourself included. Only the quick hands of an experienced medic save you from experiencing a not so gentle crash into the floor. Looking up once the dust settles to see Ratchet has you cupped safely in his palms, the two of you can't help but exchange a quick smile before the various bots around you start asking questions.

·Ratchet is quick to answer, keeping you in his hands to avoid the sea of broken glass as he stands. Any bot with decent battle experience on a ship like this recognizes what they all just felt, but being a bot who's seen more than his fair share of combat in space, he's able to explain that the size of the tremor indicates that they've been trapped by an enemy ship of smaller but not insignificant build. He gives them about five minutes before they're boarded, and instructs those gathered to head for emergency battle stations, as commands for defense will no doubt be incoming.

·Announcing his own intent to get to his post in the medical bay, the mech is quick to get going despite appearing outwardly calm, even promising Swerve he'll settle his tab when they get all this sorted. Holding you tight in one hand, he pulls up his communicator and tries to reach the bridge for specific instructions. To his frustration nothing comes through, and you find the same results when you make an attempt to establish communication with any top bot on your own communicator, prompting a few muttered swears from your partner. As usual, he's quick to get right to planning.

·Thankfully his designated task for any kind of emergency is exactly the same no matter the crisis; he heads to the medical bay and starts repairing the inevitable wounded. While you can't help with surgery, being that you're not much bigger than most of their tools, he posits that it makes sense for you to come with him. There's nothing more fortified than the medical bay, after all, so you can at least be somewhere safe. Though you're tempted to tease him about how obvious it is he wants you somewhere he can keep an optic on you, for now you decide to just settle in his hand and focus on what's ahead.

·Having been on many ships before this one, he's able to navigate with hardly a second thought, giving him a chance to keep his focus on you whilst he tries to keep figuring out the extent of the ship's difficulty. You can see him frown as he tries unsuccessfully to get his communicator working, and though you want to be stealthy for the sake of safety, you do want a better understanding of what's going on. Thankfully a human voice doesn't travel far through the hallways when spoken at conversational volume. Trying not to betray your anxiety, you ask if he can tell you anything about what to expect.

·Holding your tiny form a little closer, he hides the fact that he can see your apprehension clear as day, quite familiar with the brave face bots and humans alike will put on when in danger. Still, he certainly respects you enough to be honest. He explains that one ship latching on to another for an ambush these days is typically a pirate tactic, as they're more interested in selling the vessel afterwards or scrapping it for tech, unlike warring factions who will typically just blow each other up. There's probably already enemy forces on the ship, and they've certainly come well armed if they feel confident enough to take on Cybertronians.

·Your eyes dart around a little faster at that thought. Securing your hand against one of his digits, you remember they're sensitive enough to pick your heartbeat from just a touch, and the recollection stirs your affection whilst also making you think. If Cybertronians are so advanced, how can there be nothing working on this ship right now? Were there really no back up systems that could at least give you the basics? With the whole structure being the size of Manhattan, it'd be very nice to at least know if some areas might be safe, but then again bots tended to build things in a strange way. Nevertheless, your curiosity is so great you can't help asking a question.

·Ratchet pauses even as he keeps walking, his expression going distant in a way that initially makes you worry your query was taken with offense. But thankfully he speaks a second afterwards, looking inspired as he recalls a station of terminals not too far out of your path. It's more vulnerable, sure, but it also has physical connections to every part of the craft. He'd at least be able to conduct a system wide scan from there, and after that he'd have a much better idea of what they're up against. But he has to ask you first; are you comfortable with him taking the risk? Of course he'll always protect you, but there's a greater chance he'll need to do that if this path is chosen.

·You're smart enough to know exactly what he means. But there's a risk you'll bump into an enemy anyway, so wouldn't having a chance to get information like this be worth it? Oddly enough you seem more on board than he is with the plan, his friendly blue optics dimming with worry before you lay a comforting hand on his chest, smiling as you do so. This big mech cares so deeply for everyone, but you have a very special place in his loving spark, no matter how much he tries to pretend he's a grump. Your sentimental move seems to snap him back to hiding behind his mask, and he mutters something about feeling your heartbeat against his palm and how it's obvious you're nervous but if you say you're ready then he'll give this plan a try...

·For the sake of stealth he remains in bipedal mode, but he absolutely keeps you securely held to his chest, and you can't help but wish the circumstances were better because his spark humming beside you is impossibly soothing. Being held protectively by a Cybertronian is undoubtedly one of the most secure feelings in the world, you believe. Just being held by him in general though is enough to make you realize you're actually quite tired, enough so that you could absolutely fall asleep... Until he detects your slowing heartbeat and encourages you to stay awake.

·The terminal is in sight without a spot of trouble when Ratchet has to gently coax you awake for a second time, using a light nudge of his digit to encourage you to open your eyes once more. Though he knows the hour is late, your sudden sluggishness concerns him as a medic, enough so that he's now more intent than ever on getting some answers. Even without proof and a wealth of far more simple explanations, he's got a feeling something is wrong. A small part of his concentration is divided to keep a constant watch on your vitals.

·You're still alert enough to hear the incoming trouble just as he does; gunfire, shouts and general sounds of skirmish approaching rapidly down the hallway. Hearing him curse this unfortunate luck, you try to ascertain how long the two of you have until company arrives, but the noise is much too chaotic for you to gauge. Knowing Autobots will be amongst the fray is somehow far from comforting. Holding on tight to the hands cradling you so protectively, you look straight up just as the quick thinking doctor looks down at you, absolute trust in your eyes as you meet his optics. Whatever he decides to do next, you trust him with your life.

·The decision he makes isn't a spontaneous one, but it certainly feels like it as he barrels towards the terminals, holding his tiny partner to his chest as he runs. Knowing what's happening may well be the key to undoing any damage before it's too late. He can feel the heat of a few errant shots of blaster fire just as he gets his one spare hand on the keyboard, typing with speed he typically reserves for surgery as the world around him grows gradually more chaotic. Fortunately he only needs to hit a few buttons to bring up all the information he's looking for. Sharp optics start scanning whilst he uses his multitasking skills to keep track of everything else, listening for the threat and holding your little body close while he registers your pulse.

·The world around you feels like it's moving through water that thickens with every passing second, and neither the crackle of energy weapons nor the clanging of blades does anything to reverse the process. Even a shout from an Autobot warning Ratchet to move seems a million miles away. You know he told you to stay awake, but would he really mind if you got a quick nap in? After all, it's so late, and you're so tired, and you feel so safe in his sheltered grip... There isn't even a bit of worry in your mind regarding the fray. How could you be worried, here with the bot who would protect you always?

·Everything makes a terrifying amount of sense far too quickly. Ratchet is accustomed to the rapid responses his occupation requires of him, but for this singular instant he's frozen, optics locking on the atmosphere readout and hoping that he's simply misread it. A glancing but molten blow past his back forces him to accept what won't change, and he manages a combat roll just as the terminal is blasted by errant fire, the battle now within arms length as the same Autobot keeps encouraging him to move. He obliges only after sinking a fist into the face of an alien who wanders too close. After that, he's on the move without reservation, keeping you shielded with his entire frame as he runs.

·Your world spins without end even when the movement of everything beyond stabilizes, and you cling to the bot holding you for something to steady it all. God, what you wouldn't give to lie down and sleep... Ratchet is talking to you though, holding you so that you can see his face as he explains something about oxygen and taking deep breaths while focusing on him. It makes tragically little sense to you. Still, you feel bad as your eyelids grow heavy and your body turns to limp weight in his grip. Even your efforts to breathe as instructed feel like a failure. Of all the beings in the galaxy he's the one you want to dissapoint least, but his warm palms beneath you are so comfortable, and his spark humming in your ear is so soothing... You only hope he can forgive you for submitting to sleep.

·Ratchet knows he's powerless to wake you again, but that hardly keeps the agony from tearing at his spark. Seeing you go limp in his grasp, feeling your pulse weaken and grow irregular, hearing your breath stall... How long has it been since any medical emergency has reduced him to near panic like this? He's so invested in his task that his arrival to the medical bay only comes with orders. You're the human equivalent of a Fader, and so much of what he needs to save you isn't even ready to go! He needs to have a mask, a saline solution for dehydration, and oxygen of the exact content percentage you need to survive just to start... For the first time in eons he's terrified, even as it all comes together and he sees your vitals stabilize before his very optics, as all he can think of is how very close this came to ending tragically. As you're left recovering he quickly gets to work on other patients, throwing himself into the task so as not to worry, though his optics betray him on the regular with glances towards the berth supporting your tiny body.

·Wakefulness comes with a familiar digit resting in your palm, reading your vitals as you put together blurry pieces of a not so happy story. To your delight, a brightly colored chevron is the first thing you see when you open your eyes, and it's impossible not to smile when you roll your head over to look at the owner. Ratchet somehow looks more exhausted than you've ever seen him as he smiles back. He relays everything that happened in a way that paints him as an unimportant figure, up until you move your hand to rest atop his, your eyes filled with that same trust and admiration you'd given before he'd gone for the terminal. You want to communicate that you know how much you owe him. This brave, selfless medic who'd risked so much to give you his best and deserved the full credit for saving your life... Humility doesn't allow him to agree in full, but you're certain you can see peace in his optics, the kind he only seems to feel with you.

[paperstarwriters]

My Spark For You.

This is a kinda prequel to Multiverse Martyr on Ao3 (link provided) Can be looked at as Ratchet/Optimus or Ratchet & Optimus (for those who don’t know “/” is romantic “&” is platonic)

The fic is based off of two ideas: one, Every time Optimus dies he resets (main plot of Multiverse Martyr) and two, Ratchet starves himself of energon. If anyone has the link to the post discussing those details feel free to stick it down in a reblog or something, I’m too lazy to do it right now. 

Update: found the link here

Ratchet was always there for him. It was a universal constant. Every time he died, every time he started again, Ratchet would be there for him. Ratchet would be there to support him. To help. To heal. That wasn't his only job of course, Ratchet couldn't spend every waking moment worrying about him. Ratchet had his own problems he would have to deal with, and he would never wish to burden his old friend with something so heavy that he may not even remember. Something that could be forgotten if he died. If his spark extinguished again, if Megatron or some other Decepticon, killed him again, he could start all over. Go back to the beginning and try again. Go back to the beginning and find Ratchet again. Like a metal drawn to a magnet the injured always went to Ratchet. It wasn't surprising then that Ratchet knew he was injured.

"Is everything alright Optimus?"

He asked him every timeline. Every timeline he would reply in honest.

"No."

Lying to ratchet was no easy feat at first, but after so many deaths, Optimus forced himself to learn. Yet that simple question that he asked at the beginning of the war, he could never bring himself to lie. He always hoped that maybe once, once Ratchet would look at him and say,

"I'm here for you Optimus."

He stared at him for a second trying to confirm that he heard ratchet say the exact words from his processer. It wasn't the usual "Whatever it is, I know you can do it," or "Do you need some time alone?" that was the last thing he needed-- more reason to try and haul all these problems by himself.

"Thank you old friend. Thank you... I needed that."

He flashed him a grin, a rarity hidden under his usual grumpy nature, yet something he did every time. Something, Optimus would like to argue, that was for him alone. So was it foolish to want to protect that smile? Was it foolish to do anything to protect those precious to you?

No. He liked to believe that even Megatron thought that still, just as the three of them did long ago.

If it was an attack. Some great bomb or Megatron threatening to stab his sword into Ratchet's spark, then maybe it would be easier. Optimus could rush in and save him. He could plan some sort of escape, or worst comes to worse sacrifice himself and start all over again. What made that so difficult, was that it was his fault it had happened. Rushing into danger all the time even if they didn't have the energon needed. Staying so focused on Megatron and protecting humans that he didn't even have the time to notice Ratchet until it was far too late.

He skipped out on his energon meals. While the rest of the team kept themselves steadily full, and took extra when they got injured, Ratchet starved himself in order to let them keep fighting. What hurt the most was that his reasoning made sense. If not for Optimus' place as leader and constantly jumping into battle, he would most eagerly do the same. Starve himself for the others-- for Ratchet to remain healthy and well. He loathed how he would do that, and he loathed that he HAD done that. Sacrifice himself for others and leaving them with this pain that he felt.

He wondered how many times Ratchet wept after he died. How many times Ratchet ran into the face of danger to attempt to save him. How many times did Ratchet end up worse for wear after he died? Starving himself of energon to try and feed some back into his dead frame.

Only now Optimus held his dead frame.

It hurt. As a mech who died so many times trying to save others, as a mech who had their frame rearranged upon taking up the accursed matrix, this hurt the most. Watching others die, and being helpless to do anything. Except he wasn't helpless, was he?

The rest of the Autobots mourned with him heads lowered as he continued to cradle Ratchet's frame in his arms. They found him in the main base, during a time where they had a lack of energon. They thought they would be able to last at least a while longer. They didn’t know about Ratchet. Not until it was too late.

But nothing was ever too late for Optimus. The team mourned. They wouldn't show it now, but Optimus knew they were going to cry their optics out later. In private. Just as he did. They buried their sorrows, following him and his example, not knowing how much he hated to do it. How deep would they bury their sorrow after if he died? They would undoubtedly suffer, just as he would for the others. Yet he couldn’t help it. He was greedy. Selfish. Unbefitting as a leader.

"Forgive me," he whispered.

It took the Autobots a moment to realize that Optimus wasn't talking to Ratchet, just the amount of time it took Optimus to open his chest plating and rip out his spark. It was the first time he took his own life, by his own hand at least, and it was shoddily done. He was alive for much more longer than he intended. Long enough to see them all scream and cry and beg for him to come back. Beg someone to go fix him, only who could they ask? Their medic was dead. Cliffjumper tried to shake him, to place his spark back into his chest, but even with the fading strength, Optimus wouldn't dare let him even try. He crushed his spark in his own servo, knowing he was crushing the others' as well.

They wouldn't remember though. They wouldn’t remember, and as long as they didn’t know, he was fine to carry their sorrows on his own.

Optimus awoke on the battlefield on Cybertron. Pain etched itself into every inch of his newly rearranged frame, but this time, he didn't scream. He didn’t scream like he did all those runs beforehand. He was far too tired. He blocked every con blow they tried to hit him with, memorizing their movements from the many times he's done this before. Duck here, slice there, fire over there and ignore Megatron's irritating yelling, muttering every line he yelled in perfect harmony with him. The battle couldn't have ended sooner, but it was a practiced dance that assured the safety of the other Autobots, including Ratchet. As soon as he left the battle, he revved up his engines and traveled to get to Ratchet. It took him a few days, not one of his faster runs, but not the longest either.

Ratchet was cornered by a bunch of cons, a set, Optimus effortlessly took care of, a momentary redemption for not saving Ratchet before. It hurt to see that stare though. The stare of confusion and slight fear as Ratchet stared at a bot he didn’t know, or at least didn't recognize, but a a mere pinprick to the sight he died to.

"Ah, thank you…"

"It is good to see you again my old friend, I apologize for not coming sooner." He never knew what linked that line back to him, he never knew how Ratchet could connect it to his old name, but every time, without fail, he did.

"Orion…?"

And every time, he smiled.

[nekkyousagi]

what do you think about shockwave?

Ooooh I have mixed feelings about him! XDD

And now that I’ve seen a few series, I guess I can comment about the different versions of him...?!

TFPrime Shockwave frightened me a bit when he first appeared. Mainly because I hadn’t really seen him before!!! Huge and intimidating, cold, logical, and that one glowing red eye. Nightmarish! Maybe more than Soundwave! But after a few more re-watchings, he grew on me, and I even like that he was somewhat...tender with Predaking?? His loyalty to Megatron is intriguing, his scientific exchanges with Knockout and Ratchet in season 3 were great, and how he puts up with Starscream is both hilarious and terrifying. After the initial spookiness wore off, I had to admit Prime Shockwave’s got an impressive character design!!!! [As do all the other characters in Prime...haha I’m sorry! I’m so biased!!!]

TF Animated Shockwave is the most terrifying one!!!!!! Not going to give away spoilers for those who haven’t seen the show, but the important plot reveal involving him was...unforgettable!!! And, being responsible for the fate of a certain character I liked a lot...I...I can’t quite forgive him for that...!!!! But his interactions with Lugnut, and how they end up tussling over Megatron’s attention, had me laughing. This Shockwave is the most sinister of the ones I’ve seen so far...

Cyberverse Shockwave is the most hilarious one! Not down-playing his intelligence or his abilities as a...well, quite honestly, he’s the only capable Decepticon in this show!!! XDD My favorite thing about him has to be his competitive rivalry with Soundwave! They are constantly at each other for Megatron’s approval, even though Soundwave starts it. [I love him too, btw. One of the best Soundwave designs...but that’s for another post!] Also his strange budding friendship(?) with Wheeljack is kinda adorable??!!! His bug-like vehicle mode is still something to get used to, but he’s enjoyable to watch in this series!! And his permanent grumpy-face is sooo funny!!!

G1 Shockwave. The original, who I’ve only just recently gotten to know. This bot...this poor bot...he is just so tired and wants to get things done!! But Megatron and the Decepti-dorks are just goofing it up on Earth, after leaving him on Cybertron for 4 million years, and he’s got bare-minimum supplies to meet Megatron’s astronomical demands for space bridges and weird new tech and all he needs is those energon shipments, please??!!! And omgosh...he is so lonely...and so patient. Megatron has no idea how valuable Shockwave is! He really needs to appreciate his perfect loyalty! Forget Starscream or Soundwave, here is the most loyal G1 Decepticon!!!

That’s all for now!!!! I’m still catching up on all these shows!!! TAT

[qupshalfempty]

9. “I could never leave you behind.” With Ratchet X Human! Charge! Reader. Not yet established relationship.

This was it, this is how I die. After running and dodging shots in the alleyways and streets of this small town, I finally grew tired. Tired of running, fighting, hell the Vehicon behind me acted like it was nothing. Just a game of hide and seek with a sparkling. I hated it. I’d rather die than spend another minute being chased by the purple bastard.

I huffed and heaved, bent over trying to catch my breath. The vehicon showing no emotion, not saying anything. Just slowly aiming his gun/arm that’d be shooting my final shot. Honestly, I had regrets. But mostly, I regret not confessing to Ratchet. That grumpy bastard. I hear the sound of his gun warming up, the barrel of the gun pointing right at me. The last sounds I hear are of more vehicons closing in. I took one last breath before squeezing my eyes shut.

“Requesting a groundbridge, ETA one click.”

But instead of hearing the sound of a gun firing, I hear the clashing sounds of metal? Before I could even open my eyes I was swept up into and covered by servos, and hearing the familiar swooshing sound of the portal.

I opened my eyes once the sounds around me calmed, first being met by gray servos then by the blinding light of the base. I have never been happier to be here.

“What. Were. You. Thinking?” Came Ratchet’s voice through gritted dermas. God I missed the sound of his voice, even if he was furiously glaring into my soul. I was still trying to catch my breath when I whispered.

“I thought… I was gone. Dead.” I took a deep breath. “I thought I was left behind.”

In the disaster of a nearby fight in the woods between ‘Bee, my ride to base today, and a couple of vehicons, I was forced to run. Dodging behind trees, rocks, hiding in bushes before finally making it to town. I thought it’d stop following me but I guess it didn’t care to be seen. And through that entire mess I thought I was forgotten. After the adrenaline wore off, my world came crashing down. I was tired and hysterical, holding my head in my bruised hands and sobbing. I felt his servos twitch below me, he whispered.

“I could never leave you behind.” Ratchet’s voice tore through my head, drowning my other thoughts. I expected being yelled at, berated, instead getting comforted by Ratchet of all bots. I couldn’t process it, still sobbing while clutching onto his digit in the servos that held me close to his spark chamber. Soon I felt rubbing on my back, guessing it was one of his digits. After a while, I was reduced to a sniffling mess. My face felt hot, snot running out of my nose…. After regaining my composure somewhat I didn’t want to be seen in this state.

“Can I- .. go home..” I was interrupted by sniffles but still able to speak loud enough for him to hear. He transformed in seconds, his driver’s side door opening, beckoning me in. I hopped in, leaning my head against his steering wheel and took deep breaths. After I could breathe smoothly, we were already in front of my house.

“Are you alright?” His usually grumpy voice spoke softly from seemingly nowhere.

“Y-yeah, I’m good for now.”

“Get some rest, and stay hydrated.”

“Thanks.” I rubbed my nose and unlocked the door, he sat outside watching me in before leaving himself. I flopped onto the couch, hearing a squeak from it’s rusty springs. I was deep asleep within minutes. A caring Ratchet on my mind, comforting me with good dreams.

[that-one-jasper]

TFP Ratchet X Sick! Reader

       Regular P.o.V

               You had a very bad tendency to push yourself past your limit when you were sick. You'd force yourself to go to school and work, and help out anyone who'd ask. This meant when Miko wanted a sleepover at the base, you'd felt obligated to go, and agreed. So now you were waiting for your guardian, Smokescreen to come to pick you up and take you to the base, all the while trying to ignore the raging migraine going on in your skull.        You were snapped out of your thoughts when a car honked from outside, signalling that your guardian had arrived. Picking up your overnight bag, you left the house, locking the door in the process and hoping in the driver's seat, a cough wracking your throat as you got in. "Woah, Y/n, you don't sound too good. You sure you want to come?" Smokescreen asked. You nodded your head, "Miko wanted to do a sleepover, and It's fine I'm not that sick anyways." "If you say so, just don't let Ratchet see you." He joked, making you smile. He knew you had feelings towards the grumpy medic, and would always joke around or tease you about, but only if it was just the two of you. "He'd lose his mind if he knew I was sick and didn't take proper care." You smiled, the small town buildings getting sparser until it was all merely desert.

         Pulling into the base, Smokescreen stopped so you could walk out and make your way to the small loft that Miko and Jack were already at, challenging one another at the racing game they were playing. "Hey, guys," you greeted, setting your bag down on the floor and sitting down on the couch next to Jack. "Hey Y/n! You excited for tonight?" Miko asked, her eyes still glued onto the screen in front of her. You nodded your head with a smile, "Of course I am!" You held up the most authentic enthusiastic demeanour that you could muster, though it wasn't that easy with your migraine getting worse.           Their game soon ended with Miko as the winner, and her bragging about it. "So, what do we do next?" You questioned, hugging onto a stray pillow. "We could play truth or dare?" Miko suggested. "Maybe," Jack replied. You knew he wasn't a big fan of those types of games. "Why don't we talk about a certain wrecker you've had your eyes on?" You smirked, poking Miko's side. "What? I have no clue what you're talking about." She claimed, crossing her arms. You chuckled and nodded your head, "Sure you don't, it's not like its not obvious." Jack joined in on the teasing. None of the bots were around surprisingly, all off doing their own thing. Miko looked over at you, "Well what about you and the Doc? You're always staring at him while he works," she teased, your face flushing a bright red. "Don't be ridiculous, Ratchet wouldn't want someone like me, I'm not even his species!" You exclaimed. Miko was in silence for a moment, "I don't like this, she's planning something," Jack said uneasily. You nodded in agreement. "What if you caught his attention? Make him fall for you?" She suggested, You immediately shook your head. "Miko that's insane," Jack spoke up, you were about to say something when you started coughing. After a few moments, you couldn't stop coughing and couldn't breathe, so you quickly picked up your bag and searched for your inhaler, finding it after a few frantic seconds before using it and finally being able to breathe again. "Y/n are you alright?" Jack asked you, to which you muttered a very scratchy 'yes.' "I just have a little cold." You admitted, making Miko beam with excitement. "Aha! That's the perfect reason to see Ratchet!" You shook your head vigorously, "no, Miko." You stated, ending the discussion there. "Awe fine, but in my defence, it could've worked out between you two." You giggled at her comment, and the three of you spent the rest of the night watching movies and eating the junk food Miko had brought from home.

       You woke up in worse shape than expected, your voice was almost completely gone, you had a high fever. You tried to stand up, but was hit with very bad dizzy spells and almost tumbled down the stairs. You looked around to see that you were the only one up, and decided it would probably be best just to stay up on your phone since you wouldn't be getting any sleep in your state. You felt another coughing fit come up and reached for your inhaler. Right now you were regretting your choice to go to the sleepover rather than just staying at home. The time read 7:42 so you knew Smokescreen would be up soon and would be able to drive you home so you could deal with the cold yourself. You threw the blanket you were using over you to keep the chills away to no avail, you were shivering like a dog.        It wasn't long before you heard the thumps of an Autobot, and you got hopeful thinking it was Smokescreen, but when you looked around you were met with a white and orange paint job. "Ratchet?" You spoke as loud as your raspy voice would let you, which wasn't much. The bright blue optics met with your tired ones, and you could've sworn in your daze a flash of concern went across the medic's face. "I'm sorry to be a bug, but could are there any extra blankets? I'm freezing," Ratchet walked over towards your shivering form, and as much as he wanted to lecture you about forcing yourself out when you're sick, he knew the best thing for you was to rest. "I'll drive you home. You really need to get some rest." You nodded and said a small thank you as another coughing fit took over your system. Grabbing your stuff, you hopped into Ratchet's vehicle mode and he drove out of the base.

               "You have a very high fever," He noted after a few minutes. "Probably, it's not uncommon. And I'm really sorry you have to drive me home, I thought I could last until at least this afternoon when I planned to go home." You answered. "I'll have Smokescreen check up on you later, for now as soon as you get inside, you need to rest and have plenty of fluids if you're fever doesn't go down then take a warm bath and it should help." "You sure know a lot about humans and their health." You smiled, looking out of the window. "I figured it wouldn't hurt since Miko does get into a lot of trouble, and it certainly came in handy since you push yourself too hard when you're sick." You liked seeing this nicer side of Ratchet, though you figured he was only being this way since you wouldn't really remember after you got better.        You saw your house come into view and found yourself struggling to stand up and grab your bag. Eventually, you did, and as you walked up to your house you waved goodbye to the medic, who didn't do anything in turn. Unlocking your door, you stepped in, waved again, shut it, and fell back asleep on the couch, not even caring anymore since you always kept thick blankets in the living room.

           Some hours past and you heard a small knock at your door. cursing whoever was there, you dragged yourself out from the comfort of the warm couch and opened it, not caring how horrendous you may have looked. Though you were surprised to see the holo-form of the same medic that had dropped you off a few hours ago. "Ratchet?" Your voice was barely heard as said medic nodded his head. "Smokescreen is on a mission so I decided to check up on you." He explained as you let him in. "Have you been doing everything I listed?" "Um-no," you quickly answered, "I've been sleeping all day." You chuckled sheepishly. "Well, then it looks like I came at the right time. Since Smokescreen isn't here, and quite frankly I don't trust him to take care of you, I'll be your caretaker for the rest of the day." He declared, hanging up his jacket in the closet and ushering for you to go lay back down on the couch.

       "No Ratchet really, I'm fine," you tried to say, but it was interrupted by a coughing fit. "Doesn't sound like you're okay. Now rest, It seems like you still have a fever so I'll get you a damp cloth." He looked around for a minute before you gave a light giggle. "They're in the kitchen drawer next to the stove, third one down." He nodded and swiftly went to get it for you.        If you were being honest, you loved getting the attention of your favourite bot. He got your fever to go down and even managed to make soup-with you directing him from the couch so he wouldn't burn it. You were grateful for his help and honestly felt better enough to mostly everything.        "Thanks for everything today Ratchet, I know you're usually busy at the base," you smiled, wrapped up on the couch in a big fuzzy blanket. "It's quite alright, there wasn't much happening, and Optimus insisted I get out of the Base more." You nodded your head in agreement. "Makes sense, you two always look out for each other."        You sat quietly for a moment, debating if now was the right moment to tell him your feelings, but he beat you to it. "Y/n, I must confess something." You noticed the pinkish colour that spread to his cheeks, signalling he was embarrassed. "What is it?" You almost sound too eager to hear his response. "I must admit that for the last week or so I have become infatuated, with you." This time you felt your face heat up, and you gave him a big smile. "I'm so glad to hear that Ratchet, I feel the same," a look of relief flashed across the medic's face. "Since I'm feeling better, is it alright for me to come back to the base?" Ratchet thought for a moment, before retaking your temp and checking your vitals, and once you reassured him three times, he agreed that you could.    

           "Soo, what do we tell the team?" You questioned, looking down at the dashboard. "Do you want to tell them?" He answered with another question, and you shook your head. "I mean it's not that I have a problem if they know, but I kinda want to keep it on the down-low, for now, maybe we only tell Optimus first." Ratchet agreed with you as he drove into the base, where a couple of the bots were hanging around, along with Miko.          Stepping out, you were greeted by an excited Miko, who basically smothered you with a hug until you couldn't breathe. "No roughhousing Y/n, take it easy," were Ratchet's last few words to you before turning over to work on the computer. "Don't worry!" You called back. Miko sent you a sly smirk. "What? What's that supposed to mean?" You asked, only making her giggle. "He obviously cares about you, why not make a move first?" You shook your head and climbed up to rest on the couch. "No, I think I'm good for now," You replied.        Not too long after talking with Jack, Raf and Miko for some time did Smokescreen come and greet you. "Hey Y/n, Ratchet drive you back home?" You nodded your head. "I was just going to for you to wake up, but I felt really sick so I asked if he could." "Awe I'm sorry Y/n, next time come wake me and I'll drive you." He told, "no-no, you already use enough energy, that recharge is all you have. Besides, I'm feeling better now." Miko joined in on the conversation, "was it because the doc was at your house all day today?" You blushed and hid your face in your hands, making your friends laugh at you. "Well, he only did it because Smokescreen was out on a mission," saying this caused a confused look on the rookie's face. "What? I didn't have a mission today? We were all here, save for some patrol but nothing too unusual. Why would he say I have a mission?" "Aww, he wanted to spend time with you!" Miko poked your cheek, "that's adorable Y/n!" She squealed. "He has a soft spot for you, you know." Smokescreen said in a hushed tone to you. You giggled along with them before glancing towards the medbay. "You wanna go make a move?" Miko asked, nudging your side. You decided why the heck not, and motioned for Smokescreen to help you up.

       'Hey Ratchet," You greeted, as you walked closer to him. "Y/n," he greeted half mindedly, more so focusing on the screen in front of him. "So I was wondering why you said Smokescreen was on a mission when he was actually here at the base?" This made the medic stop, and blush a very faint, but bright blue. "W-Well," he stumbled over his words, and you giggled. "It's alright Ratchet, you can tell me later. But I wanted to know if you wanted to go on a date sometime?" You asked fairly calmly, though on the inside you were completely freaking out. The white and orange bot thought for a moment before replying with a very quiet, "yes," making you grin from ear to ear.

       For the rest of the day, you sat there and worked with Ratchet with whatever he was doing, just wanting to spend time with him overall, as Smokescreen and Miko would watch from afar, sometimes giggling or whispering to one another as they watched on. You felt being with Ratchet was right, and hopefully, he thought the same, but only time will tell.

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Definitely not my best, but I wanted a nice sweet chapter to kick us off again. I really hope you guys enjoyed it :) 

[yes-i-write-fanfiction]

Hey, so I saw a post about what if the tfa bots with a s/o that was a Cybertonian but was raised on earth and knew nothing about Cybertron, which got me thinking, how different would the tfa boys be if they were the ones raised on earth? (Sorry for my bad english by the way)

Optimus: He’s a natural born leader and people instinctively follow him and listen to what he has to say. In this universe Optimus didn’t suffer the trauma from Archa 7 so he’s more confident in his abilities as a leader, unafraid of taking action and to take the lead. This makes him a tad more cocky, but not to an unbearable extent. Still, sometimes Optimus gets ahead of himself and others have to remind him that not everyone is a giant robot, not everyone can do what he can. Because the role of leader often falls on his shoulders he’s used to being the responsible one, the good guy. It can get a bit stressful but he doesn’t know how to deal with these emotions so he ends up just bottling them up.

Charismatic and knows it, so this Optimus is a bit of a flirt and a tease. He likes to mess around and make people laugh and feel comfortable. A people pleaser, through and though. Because of this he often forgets to put himself and his own wellbeing in front of others.

Bumblebee: Now, contrary to regular Bumblebee, who always felt small among his kind, on Earth he’s the tallest one there is. He’s used to people looking up to him, turning towards him when they need help with something. It’s nice to feel relied on, to feel useful. But sometimes it just gets too much and that’s when Bee needs to take a break. And just like his regular counterpart, this version of Bee loves racing. He loves going as fast as he can, feel the road under his tires. Nothing makes him feel more free. He’s more mature in this universe, ready to compromise and do the things he don’t necessarily feel like doing. Still, Bee jokes around a lot and loves to make people laugh.

He’s got a lot of friends that like and appreciate him for who he is, which makes him more self confident and proud of who he is. He isn’t obsessed with making people acknowledge him. There are times though where he wonders who he really is and what he’s meant to do. How can other people know him if he doesn’t even know himself.

Ratchet: He was a wild child when he was young, doing what he wanted when he wanted. Despite this his parents never got mad at him and as he got older he matured, but he still kept a bit of his playful attitude, not being quite as grumpy as his regular counterpart. Ratchet came to realize his calling as a medic/doctor and decided to study human medicine. He quickly mastered it and became an amazing doctor and since he had such a long life span he just continued to learn more and more about human anatomy until he knew everything. Yet despite being the best doctor you could find there was one thing Ratchet could not cure and that was human aging. His parents died of old age when Ratchet was still young for a Cybertronian, wounding him deeply. Because of this he became afraid of making deep connections with humans, not wanting to outlive everyone he loves and cares about.

Contrary to regular Ratchet, this version of him is much more outwardly fond of humans. While not all of them are good he’s met so many amazing and kind ones during his lifetime that he can’t help but love them as a whole. He smiles more, is more relaxed and appreciates life a bit more. But he’s also afraid of having relationships since he’s lost so many of his human friends.

Prowl: When Prowl was young he thought he was human, that he just looked a bit different, but as he grew older he was forced to face the fact that he was anything but. Upon realizing that he wasn’t human Prowl became confused and frustrated. Who was he? WHAT was he? These unanswered questions made him act out, he started hanging out with the wrong crowd and made bad life choices. But after an accident he turned his life around, deciding it was time for him to find himself. He wanted to be a person his parents could be proud of. So Prowl traveled around the world, meeting new people and getting plenty of friends. During his travels he learned to accept who he was and found inner peace.

Just like his regular counterpart, this Prowl has a strong connection with nature, but even stronger is his wish to be organic. Ever since he was young he’s wanted to be like his parents, his friends. They always included him and treated him like one of them but Prowl always knew he was different. He just wants to belong.

Bulkhead: Big even as a child Bulkhead could be compared to a big dog thinking it was a lapdog. There were plenty of destroyed furniture in his youth but with time he learned how to be more careful. His parents encourage Bulkhead’s passion in painting, giving him plenty of brushes, paint and canvases. They would take him to art galleries, public art installations and eventually they even manage to enroll him into art school. Thanks to their support Bulkhead grows as an artist and gets to know a lot of other artists, making lots of connections. The day of his first art exhibit his parents were there, congratulating him and telling him they always knew he could do it.

This version of Bulkhead is more confident and outgoing than his regular counterpart. He’s not afraid to take up place and voice his opinions. Still very humble though, and doesn’t brag about how famous he is. Thanks to his art, which is very popular, he’s earned a lot of money which he donates most of it to charity. Just wants to make the world a better place with his art.

[rawmeknockout]

What would it be like for mtmte Ratchet’s first meeting the new human liaison? How they would get to know one another? Their first kiss? I just really love Ratchet ^///^

01 + He’s stand off at first. Ratchet has known humans before, and he’s been hurt by their short lives. He also is a grump and doesn’t know how to connect to young organic well. Drift pushes him to get to know you, though, because Drift really likes you and enjoys your company.

02 + You meet as standard routine. He needs to collect your health records and go over the basics of the medbay with you, how to make appointments, when a medic is in, etc. You laugh at his dry wit and no-nonsense statements towards others. It’s a nice change from being the stick-in-the-mud that no one likes and everyone avoids. He thinks about your soft, muffled laughter the rest of the day.

03 + Ratchet... Actually really appreciates your presence on the Lost Light. Being on the LL is like retirement for him, so he’s really not looking for a strenuous time. He just wants to rest. Humans are a lot more chill than bots and less inclined to pick fights with giant mechs than Cyberteonians are.

04 + You inevitably get very hurt onboard the Lost Light, but luckily Ratchet knows a thing or two about organic anatomy. It’s the first time he hugs you. He’s a big softie deep down and doesn’t want to see any innocent being hurt. It surprises him how terrified he was of losing you.

05 + You work closely with UM, so naturally you get used to the grumpy, strict personality type. It makes befriending and getting closer to Ratchet easier. You two like to play card games together when Ratchet has some free time, or you show him your music collection from Earth. He’s not as big on music as you are, but he enjoys it much more than the chatter at Swerve’s.

06 + Your first kiss is on the observation deck. Romantic and slow. Ratchet was so sure he would chicken out, because you’re beautiful and deserve much better than he can provide, but how can he resist you when you are so perfect for him. Drift is “just passing by” when it happens.

07 + Everyone soon finds out you’re together, which isn’t something Ratchet particularly likes. All bots should know to keep away from you, but he also doesn’t like people being in his business. The idea grows on him, especially when he can hold your hand in the bar without flushing.

08 + Your first time doesn’t happen quickly. You’re both very busy. But eventually, soon, he does become more intimate with you. Just slow touches and brushing of lips that move lower and lower. Ratchet, despite being tired, reenergizes when he gets to ‘do something’ for you.