#THEY LITERALLY DO IT BACK TO BACK LIKE BRUH

[suiana]

(yandere! zombie x gn! survivor reader) (im such a youtube shorts kid bruh this idea came to me because of a video i watched)

did you know that zombies retain their habits from when they were humans?

well you sure as hell do now, because why is your annoying neighbour still following you around?? he's literally fucking rotting???

"shoo! go away!"

you hiss at him, shooting a rubber band at him before quickly climbing up a tree. phew, you wouldn't be bothered by him from here. it's been like this for a few days now, your undead neighbour following you around as you did your best to survive in this ruined world.

you never really liked him, your neighbour that is. he's always been that one weird guy that keeps annoying you ever since he moved in. constantly knocking on your door and asking to have meals together, to getting to and from work at the same times as you... you're so sure that he was stalking you. how could it ever be a coincidence that he just somehow knew when you were going out and coming back from work?

but now you wouldn't ever know and it's not like you wanted to know anyway. ignorance is bliss after all. oh! he's also very stubborn and it's quite apparent in his zombie form.

"bweh."

"go away!"

the zombie hits at the tree you were sitting down on as he looks up at you with what seemed to be puppydog eyes. you could only grimace at the sight before checking through your supplies. shit, you're running out of stuff.

"ugh... i'll need to scavenge for food-"

"guh!"

you raise an eyebrow at your undead admirer before humming. right, you suppose it isn't that bad that you have him around... he gives you stuff that's useful and scares away other mobs (you think he eats them if they get too close to you). you would've actually coddled him like a dog if he wasn't trying to get into your pants or kiss you every second.

"thanks."

you lean forward and snatch the bad of chips from his rotting hands before stuffing it into your bag. mn, you could probably have that for your lunch and dinner tomorrow.

"let's see... i need to find a good place to sleep tonight."

"bwa! buh beh!"

your zombie immediately starts scratching at the tree bark before jutting his lower lip. huh...

"no, i'm not sleeping in your apartment."

"gah!"

you think you're starting to understand zombie language because why are you holding full on conversations with him??

"don't give me that face. you know our apartment complex is riddled with zombies. i don't want to be turned."

"kh... gur! rh..."

"you think i'm trusting you? i swear i saw our old neighbour lurking around there and he was an olympic sprinter."

you shake your finger at the zombie before sighing softly. why did this apocalypse have to happen? things were going great for you before this. you just had a raise and you were so close to landing a date with your hot boss!

if you didn't know any better you'd have thought that your little zombie admirer was the one who kickstarted this zombie apocalypse because of his jealousy. what did he work as before he turned? a scientist?

"tn... jhn... ngh..."

"don't act all sassy with me right now. it's not like i want to sleep in your place to begin with. you'd probably lock me in there with you and i'd be trapped."

"bah!"

rolling your eyes at the sassy undead man, you rest against the trunk of the tree and shut your eyes. might as well get some rest before setting off again.

"i'm going to rest now. help me keep an eye out."

"kah kah. jah?"

"no, i won't kiss you. and no, i most certainly won't reward you with myself. you're rotting, damnit! how many times do i have to tell you that?"

"ui..."

what in the sassy zombie apocalypse have you gotten yourself into?

[megahra]

Hercules and Megara sacrificing themselves for each other

[writterings]

me with my 18 year old students that i teach at a college

[shadystranger]

this moment so fucked up💀

[thatstheproblemwithnapkinman]

i was having a conversation with someone and brought up i like dc comics so they asked me who my favourite character was and when i said nightwing they responded with

"he's too good for me tbh, he's a great character but a boy scout, why i like batman because he certainly isn't"

and i didn't know how to respond...

[ryuseitai]

its come to my attention that i cant get my nose ring. out of my nose.

[todayisafridaynight]

cozy

[the-punforgiven]

I think it should be illegal for landlords to use a property service that anonymizes them, like, what are you hiding from, buddy? 👁👁

Surely if you just treat your tenants well and do your job, you won't need to hide from anyone, right?

[akkivee]

when you rewatch the entirety of the season, you watch chiaro and scuro slowly come into akira and satoru’s individual character quirks, like akira’s weird metaphors that he’s never personally experienced and satoru’s comparatively brighter personality

so it is a different kind of painful to watch akira and satoru die, see them practically reborn as chiaro and scuro only for them to lose their lives again 😭😭😭

[spookydingus]

so this oil company rep has been coming around for years and trying to get us to shuffle off so they can plop a drill down on our land right

mf came back about half an hour ago to interrupt our pizza and mst3k festivities

only he drove up to the rural foothills in a fucking pontiac firebird that is now VERY buried in wet clay

you better believe I stood around holding a lantern and ribbing him about it for ten minutes and not helping whatsoever

[bisaster-energy]

im not even done my current kuwameshi fic and im already getting ideas about new ones...

[digitaldiseas3]

i’m so excited for my next opportunity to abuse substances

[pastelpousay]

Having the Urge to post 30 times a day because I can 😽

(I just wanna talk about Hades and Rina 😿)

[garmaballs]

will forever resent my cousins back home for being able to live the life i will never have

[jiisoooo]

antis going “oh shipping sukuita is bad and illegal cuz age gap and yuji is 15!” Like bruh….as if there aren’t PLENTY of popular media (buffy, vampire diaries, twilight) featuring the teenage mc dating 100+ yr old vampires….

[opens-up-4-nobody]

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