#The Shadowhunters the downworlders and the big bad terrible not good Clave

[compulsiveshipper]

Magnus: How're things going at the Institute? Alec: Good. Sometimes I get the overwhelming desire to eat glass but it usually passes without incident.

[rhosyn-du]

Title: A Wonderful Institution Artist: @bidnezz​ Pairings: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, various background pairings Word Count: ~53k Warnings: graphic depictions of violence, discrimination against Downworlders, reference to rape, Clave-typical homophobia, implied character death, minor character death Summary: Magnus doesn’t have time for this bullshit. Warlocks are disappearing in New York City—five people in less than three months—and Magnus is determined to find them and protect the rest of his people from whatever took them. He doesn’t have time for politics, and he certainly doesn’t have time for whatever nonsense the Clave is proposing about marrying a Shadowhunter to a Downworlder as part of the new Accords. He doesn’t really have time for a pretty Shadowhunter who’s surprisingly kind to warlock children, either, but, well, he’s always been good at multitasking.

Alec always knew he couldn’t have what he wanted, but he’s spent the nearly four years since the newly-appointed Consul recalled his parents to Idris without explanation making the best of what he can have. When life suddenly offers up almost everything Alec actually wants on a silver platter, he can’t quite bring himself to trust it, especially when it comes with a million caveats and a side of impending disaster. But he knows how to handle disasters, even if the return of the Circle on top of Clave secrets that could destroy the Accords is way beyond the disasters he’s used to fielding. Hope, on the other hand? He doesn’t know what to do with that.

This fic was created for the @malecdiscordserver​​ Mini Bang 2020.

Chapter Five

To say that Magnus was surprised to get a phone call from Alec would be an understatement, but he wasn’t about to question it when he’d been trying to think of a way to approach the man anyway. So when Alec suggested that it might be a good idea for them to meet in an informal setting, Magnus said he was free now and invited him over to the loft, grateful that he didn’t have the hangover he’d initially been expecting to have this morning, although he was still more than a little bitter about the reasons for that.

He hadn’t even gotten the information he needed from Camille, since his plans to see her had been interrupted by a call from the bouncer at Pandemonium saying that he’d spotted two Circle members at the club. He’d ejected them immediately, with what sounded like help from no few of the patrons, but Magnus went to check things out anyway. If nothing else, seeing that he took this matter seriously would reassure the Downworlders who frequented his club that he took their safety seriously.

As Magnus flipped through his closet, he mentally reviewed what he planned to say to Alexander. Circumstances had changed, but the basic plan was the same: convince Alec that political marriages in general, and this one in particular, were a terrible idea, and then somehow segue into convincing Alec to go out on a date with him immediately after convincing Alec not to marry him, and, you know, this plan was really a lot better when Magnus was convinced the Clave would never approve of Alec marrying him.

Okay. New plan. Convince Alec that he didn’t actually want to be involved in this ridiculous Accords marriage and save everything else for another day. Magnus let out a frustrated breath. It would have to do.

Addendum to the plan, he thought as his hand stopped on a favorite deep plum button-down. Look amazing while executing the plan.

By the time Alec arrived, Magnus was a bundle of nerves. He did, however, look amazing, if he said so himself. Alec seemed to agree, if the way his eyes briefly trailed over the open V of Magnus’s shirt when he opened the door were anything to go by.

“Hello, Alexander,” Magnus said.

Alec’s eyes snapped to Magnus’s face, a hint of surprise in them, as though they’d strayed southward without his knowledge or permission. It was more than a little charming, and Magnus had to remind himself why he’d invited Alec over.

“Thanks for agreeing to see me,” Alec said as Magnus led him into the loft.

“Of course,” Magnus answered. “I have to admit I’m having trouble thinking of a circumstance in which I wouldn’t want to see you,” he couldn’t help adding, and then immediately wished he could take it back. This meeting was for executing the plan, not flirting. No matter how much he liked Alec’s little almost-smile when he did.

“I was just about to mix myself a drink,” Magnus said. “Can I offer you anything?”

“Um, sure,” Alec said. “I’ll have…whatever you’re having?”

Magnus turned to his dry bar and quickly mixed up a couple of lemon drops. It wasn’t what he’d normally drink, but it should be easy enough on the palate of someone who didn’t even have a usual cocktail order.

When Magnus turned back around, Alec was still standing awkwardly in the entrance to the living room. Magnus walked over and handed him his drink.

“To us,” Magnus said, and dammit, he was just unbelievably bad at this whole not flirting with Alec thing.

Alec clinked his glass against Magnus’s and took a sip from his drink. His resulting wince had Magnus reconsidering his stance on lemon drops as a suitable drink for people who don’t normally indulge.

“Why don’t we sit down,” Magnus suggested, leading the way further into the room.

He briefly debated sitting on one end of the couch but decided that would be a bit too intimate for the conversation he wanted to have if Alec took the other end. Instead, he settled in a red velvet armchair that was a wonderful contrast to his shirt.

Alec perched on the edge of the other armchair, looking for all the world like he might bolt for the door at any minute. He took a long sip from his drink, wincing again but looking far more determined after.

“I thought it might be a good idea,” Alec began, “for us to discuss our plans and, um, expectations. For after the wedding.”

And Magnus couldn’t help himself. It was just too good an opening. “Well, I’m not planning to ravish you on our wedding night, if that’s what you’re asking.” 

“No! That’s not—” Alec spluttered. “I didn’t mean to— I don’t think you—”

“Unless you ask nicely, of course,” Magnus added smoothly, with an exaggerated eyebrow waggle.

The tension in Alec’s body drained away as he rolled his eyes in a way Magnus might almost have called fond.

“I meant,” Alec said, sounding genuinely at ease for the first time since he’d entered the loft, “that we should discuss our expectations for how we intend to present ourselves as a married couple and our plans for leveraging that to support the Accords and improve the relationship between Shadowhunters and Downworlders.”

Magnus froze, drink an inch from his lips. Of all the possibilities he’d been anticipating, the idea that Alexander might actually believe this marriage could be some kind of real benefit to relations between the Clave and the Downworld was not among them. He took a careful sip of his drink, letting the sour-sweetness roll over his tongue while he reassessed all of his earlier assumptions.

“To be honest, Alexander, my expectations in that regard are that we will be very lucky if the Clave's insistence on marrying two strangers together as a symbol of the integrity of the Accords doesn't result in all-out war.”

Alec frowned. “But we aren't strangers. I don't know you well, but I know that we fight well together and I—I like you, and that’s more than I can say for a lot of people. And we have the chance to do something here, something real. You're the High Warlock of Brooklyn and my parents might officially run the Institute, but I'm Acting Head and actually run it for all practical purposes. We can use those positions to our advantage and maybe really start to change things.”

It was hard not to get swept up in Alec's earnest optimism, the way his face lit up when he was speaking.

“The Clave has been paying lip service to improving relations with the Downworld for centuries,” Magnus said. “And they have proven to be nothing more substantial than so much smoke every time. Do you really believe that if you tried to use your position as Acting Head of the Institute to change the way Shadowhunters here treat Downworlders, you'd actually be allowed to keep your position?”

“I think,” Alec said carefully, “that I'm not in a position to make big changes, but even small changes can make a difference. Even just the fact that we'll be married, a Shadowhunter and a warlock, and people will see it, that could make a difference.”

“Except,” Magnus countered, “that everyone knows this is purely a political alliance. Just another clause in the Accords.”

“It doesn’t have to be,” Alec snapped.

Magnus froze, unable to find words to respond to that.

Alec made a frustrated noise and rubbed a hand down his face. “I’m saying this all wrong.” He looked at Magnus, who was still unmoving and watching Alec warily. “What I mean is, I trust you.” He shook his head. “I don’t know why, but I do. And I think this could be an actual partnership, that we could make a real difference. Together. If you want.”

Magnus forced himself to relax, pushing down the stab of disappointment that Alec hadn’t actually been suggesting their political union could grow into a real marriage. It would have been a foolish and naive suggestion, anyway. But that did bring up an angle of argument Magnus might be able to use to his advantage.

“What about love?” Magnus asked, intentionally vague. He didn’t miss the way Alec’s eyes went wide at the question.

“W-what?” Alec stammered.

“I’ve lived for centuries, Alexander,” Magnus said. “I’ve fallen in love, fallen out of love, broken hearts, had my own heart broken, all countless times. You’ve been alive, what? Twenty years and change? You haven’t had those experiences, and if you go through with this marriage, chances are you never will. Or worse, you will fall in love one day, and you’ll have to choose between keeping the Accords intact and being true to your own heart.”

“You sound like my sister,” Alec told him.

“It sounds like Isabelle is a smart woman,” Magnus said with a shrug.

“What about you?” Alec challenged. “If you’ve been in love so many times, isn’t there just as much chance that you’d be the one having to make that choice?”

“No,” Magnus said. “I haven’t loved anyone in nearly a hundred years, not like that.” No need to mention that he didn’t plan on actually getting married, or that Alec himself was the only person who’d made him feel anything in all that time.

“Then maybe the Seelie Queen was right,” Alec said with a sad smile. “Marrying for love is not something that has ever been an option for me, so maybe we really are a perfect match.” He looked down at his drink. “Except for the part where you’re trying to talk me out of marrying you.”

“Alexander…” Magnus didn’t know what to say. This wasn’t going at all the way he’d hoped. He’d been too obvious in his intent, and now he’d given Alec entirely the wrong impression.

“I guess I’m not what you expected,” Alec continued. “And I get that. You’re not what I expected, either, but…but that doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

“Look, I know you have some kind of history with my parents,” he continued. “I don’t know what happened between you, and I don’t expect you to tell me, but if that’s what this is about—”

“No,” Magnus cut in. “Alexander, no, this isn’t about your parents. I’m a warlock. I know better than to judge a person on who their parents are. This is between you and me.”

Alec wilted, and Magnus realized that, once again, he’d said entirely the wrong thing. He wished Alec would look at him.

“I think you’re right that we could work well together,” Magnus said, searching for the right words to say what he needed to without revealing too much of himself. “But this marriage is a disaster waiting to happen, as tied up as it is in Shadow World politics. And I don’t want that to get in the way of what we could do together. What we could be.”

Alec looked up, finally, and Magnus could see wariness in his eyes. “Why didn’t you object to me when you had the chance? You and the other Downworld leaders could have rejected me. The Clave would have chosen someone else for you.”

It was all Magnus could do not to break out into hysterical laughter. Now that would have been an even bigger disaster. As much as he didn’t want to marry Alec for the sake of the Accords, it was nothing compared to how little he wanted to be married off to some other Shadowhunter. Or how little he wanted to see Alec married to someone else for the sake of politics.

Magnus realized, with a sudden, startling clarity, that somewhere along the line, he’d already unconsciously decided that if he couldn’t talk Alec out of withdrawing from this marriage, Magnus was going to go through with it.

“Trust,” Magnus answered, not quite able to control the tremor in his voice, “makes you do strange things.”

Alec studied him for a long moment, then said, “Can I ask you something?”

Magnus had a terrible suspicion that he knew what Alec was going to ask, and he wasn’t ready to explain about his split-second decision during the meeting with the Clave, so instead of letting Alec ask the question, he just started talking. After all, if Alec never asked the question and Magnus didn’t say anything actually untrue, then it wasn’t a lie and he didn’t have to feel bad about it.

“The Spiral Council impressed upon me how meaningful it would be to have someone with my position and reputation give the revised Accords their full support,” Magnus said. “As skeptical as I am that the Clave will ever truly see Downworlders as equals, it would be a disaster if the Accords fell apart.”

“That’s good to know,” Alec said, “but that’s not what I was going to ask.”

“I apologize for presuming,” Magnus said. “Ask away.”

Alec ran his tongue along his lower lip, a nervous gesture that nonetheless had Magnus’s thoughts spinning off in a direction that wasn’t at all helpful at the moment.

“Before,” Alec said, “why did you invite me for drinks?”

Magnus blinked. That wasn’t even on the list of questions he might have been expecting. “I thought that would be obvious.”

“Not to me,” Alec told him.

Magnus suddenly found his drink very interesting to look at. “I wanted to spend more time with you.”

“Why?” There was genuine confusion in Alec’s voice.

Magnus sipped his drink, considering his answer. “For nearly a century, I closed myself off to feeling anything for anyone, man or woman.” He looked up at Alec through his eyelashes. “You’ve unlocked something in me.”

Alec stared. “I don’t— Magnus, I—”

Magnus shook his head. “You don’t have to say anything. You asked a question, and I answered it. I don’t expect anything from you.”

“What about living arrangements?” Alec asked suddenly.

Magnus raised his eyebrows, mind struggling to catch up with the sudden change in topic. “I’m not sure I understand the question.”

“After the wedding,” Alec explained. “I can’t invite you to live at the Institute. Accords or not, I can’t imagine the Clave accepting that. But we should live together if we’re going to do this right, at least some of the time. Obviously, I’ll need to stay at the Institute sometimes, because that’s just how these things work, but. Maybe we should think about getting a place together? For appearances sake.”

“I take it my attempts to talk you out of getting married haven’t been very effective,” Magnus said dryly.

Alec shrugged. “Have you even managed to convince yourself?”

It was far too perceptive a question, and Magnus laughed despite himself. “If you decide to marry me,” Magnus said, “you can have my guest room.”

“Okay,” Alec agreed. “That seems like a reasonable choice, if you don’t mind me invading your space like that.”

“I mind it far less than I mind the thought of abandoning my loft,” Magnus told him.

Alec nodded in understanding. “I should probably go,” he said. “I’ve taken up too much of your time already.”

“I wouldn’t have invited you if I minded you taking up my time,” Magnus said. “Stay for one more drink?”

Alec shook his head. “I want to. But there are things I need to take care of at the Institute, and I can’t do that if I have another drink.”

“I suppose I can’t fault you for being responsible,” Magnus said with an exaggerated sigh. “At least let me see you out.”

They moved toward the door, but Alec stopped in the entryway. “I’m not going to change my mind. My reasons for doing this might be different than yours, but they aren’t going to go away just because you have doubts about the Accords.”

“You say that now,” Magnus said, “but just wait until we get into planning this wedding. I imagine even that will be a trial with the Clave involved.”

Alec’s lips twitched in almost the semblance of a smile. “I’m less worried about the Clave than I am my sister. She takes parties very seriously.”

“As do I, Alexander,” Magnus said. “Perhaps between the two of us, Isabelle and I are a match for the Clave.”

“I don’t doubt it for a second,” Alec told him. And then, more softly, “And if you and Iz make that great a team, imagine what you and I can do.”

Magnus found he didn’t have an answer to that.

When Alec returned to the Institute, half-anxious and half-giddy from his talk with Magnus, Jace was waiting for him.

“Something wrong?” he asked.  “Don’t tell me that little redheaded mundane you picked up is making trouble.”

“Clary’s still asleep,” Jace told him, “and you know I had no choice but to bring her back here. She’s nephilim, Alec, even if she’s not a Shadowhunter. She wouldn’t be able to bear a rune otherwise.”

“So you’ve said,” Alec said. “If it’s not the mundie, then what’s wrong?”

“Maybe nothing,” Jace said. “Maryse and Robert left word that they wanted to speak with you in the office as soon as you got back.”

“They say why?”  He was in no way prepared for a rehash of the conversation they’d already had about his impending nuptials.

Jace shook his head. “Just that they’re being recalled to Alicante, and they need to speak with you before they leave.”

Alec felt only a little bad at his relief that he would finally have his Institute back. He missed his parents when they were away, but he didn’t miss the way they treated him like he was still a child when they were here.

The door to his office was closed when he arrived, so Alec knocked, even as he felt a stab of irritation at needing to. Just one more conversation, he reminded himself, and they’d be out of his hair.

Robert opened the door, a faint frown on his face that had Alec immediately on edge.

“Come in, son,” he said.

Alec was further discomfited when he found his mother seated on one of the armchairs in the middle of the room and his father moved to join her there. Normally, one of them would be sitting behind the desk.

“Jace said you wanted to see me.”

“Yes,” Maryse said. “Have a seat, Alec.”

Alec took one of the remaining seats, facing his parents. “If this about the wedding—” he began.

“It’s not,” Robert interrupted. “At least, not directly, although I suspect that had something to do with the Council’s decision.”

The wariness in Alec’s belly had jumped up to full alarm by this point. “What decision?”

“They’re officially making you Head of the Institute,” Maryse said matter-of-factly.

“They’re—” Alec blinked. “After all this time? Why? Not that I’m complaining,” he hastened to add, “but what about you and Dad?”

“I've been offered a position teaching at the Academy,” Robert said. “One that I’ve decided to accept.”

“And Mom?”

“I already have a job in Alicante,” Maryse said.

“Right,” Alec said. “The secret job you've been pretending not to have for years.”

Maryse sighed. “Things are different now. I wish they weren’t, but with you as Head of the Institute and some things that have recently come to light, we can’t keep you safe from this any longer.”

“Keep me safe?” Alec didn’t know whether to be astonished or angry. “You left. And I was an adult when you did, but Jace and Izzy weren’t. You don’t keep your children safe by abandoning them.”

“It was the only way,” Maryse told him. “You were safer here, even without us to watch over you, than you would have been if we hadn’t gone to Idris. The situation in Alicante was— The entire Clave was in danger.”

“Whatever it is you need to say,” Alec said, “just tell me.”

“What we’re about to tell you stays in this room,” Robert began. “The information is too dangerous to get out, and we don’t know who we can trust.”

Alec shook his head. “That doesn’t work for me. You either trust me with this, or you don’t. If you’re going to give me information that’s important to running this Institute, then you need to trust me to know who to tell and who not to.”

His parents exchanged a glance, seeming to speak with their eyes. Finally, Maryse shook her head and looked away.

Robert looked at Alec. “Valentine Morgenstern is alive. He’s been working to rebuild the Circle for at least five years.”

“Wait,” Alec said. “Is that why the two of you were recalled to Idris after Consul Dieudonné died? Did the Circle kill him?”

Maryse took a deep breath, steeling herself, then turned back to her son. “No,” she said. “Malachi Dieudonné was part of the Circle. He was working with Valentine. Your father and I uncovered his plot and stopped him.”

Alec stared, having trouble taking this all in. “How?” he asked. “How is it possible that the former Consul was part of the Circle, and this is the first I’ve heard of it? It seems like that’s the kind of thing people would talk about, especially if he was executed for it.”

“You have to understand,” Maryse said, “we didn’t know who we could trust. Even now, we aren’t certain how far Valentine’s reach goes. When we uncovered Malachi’s betrayal, we went to the people on the Council we knew we could trust.”

“Our family has been close with the Penhallows for generations,” Robert said, “and your mother and Jia were always close. So that was one person we knew we could trust.”

“And Imogen Herondale’s hatred for the Circle is legendary,” Maryse added. “Valentine had her son killed, so we knew that she would never work with him. But that was it. Out of the entire Council, Imogen and Jia were the only two we could be absolutely certain weren’t working with Valentine, and with the discovery of Malachi’s betrayal, we were very cautious.”

“So, what?” Alec said. “The four of you got together and rooted out the Circle members on the Council?” He was having trouble believing what he was hearing. “How would you even begin to do that?”

Maryse shook her head. “We didn’t have the means to determine who on the Council was working for Valentine, not with Malachi still in charge. It isn’t as simple as that, you have to understand. We were just two Heads of Institute, and we were accusing the Consul of treason.”

“Still,” Alec said, “you were Heads of Institute. Surely, that carries some weight.”

Once again, his parents shared a look.

“We weren’t exactly in high standing in Idris at the time,” Robert said. “We still aren’t, to be frank, but it’s better now that we’ve been working with Consul Penhallow for the past several years. Still, it’s a tenuous thing, and you need to understand why.”

Robert’s face was grave as he continued. “Your mother and I were given the New York Institute under unusual circumstances. It was a reward of sorts for doing our jobs, but it was also an effective banishment from Idris.”

“Banishment?” Alec asked, shocked. “What for?”

“For being members of the Circle,” Maryse answered.  “And for recruiting people to Valentine’s cause.”

Alec gasped in a deep breath. It wasn’t possible. He knew his parents could be harsh, and their distaste for Downworlders was obvious even when they made an attempt to hide it, but the Circle wanted to eliminate the entire Downworld, to wipe every vampire, werewolf, warlock, and seelie from existence. That went beyond mere dislike. That was genocide.

“We left, obviously,” Maryse added quickly. “The reason we weren’t executed or imprisoned is that we turned on Valentine and the Circle, and helped the Council take them down.”

Alec stared, horrified. “That— That doesn’t make up for being a part of the Circle in the first place,” he told them. “What Valentine and his followers tried to do was horrific. I can’t believe you were a part of it, even for a short time.”

“Valentine didn’t start out a fanatic,” Robert insisted. “At first, his goals were noble. He wanted to protect Shadowhunters and mundanes from the demonic influence among Downworlders.”

“We did it because we wanted to make the world a better place,” Maryse said. “For our family. For our children.”

Alec shook his head. “No. No, you don’t get to say you did this for us. Your sins are your own. You leave us out of it.”

“Alec—” Maryse started, but Alec cut her off.

“That’s enough. You must have a reason for telling me all this, so get to the point. You aren’t going to be able to justify your involvement with the Circle to me. So, Valentine Morgenstern is still alive, the Circle is still alive and well, and you were involved in some conspiracy to take down the former Consul.

“Wait,” Alec realized. “Did you have something to do with Consul Dieudonné’s death?”

“That’s not important right now,” Maryse said, as good as confirming it. “What’s important is that I’ve been helping Consul Penhallow track the Circle’s movements for years, and I have it from several sources that Valentine now believes the Mortal Cup is somewhere in New York.”

Alec rubbed a hand down his face. “So, you’re telling me that there are going to be Circle members around New York.”

“Around New York, and possibly even already within this Institute,” Robert said.

“We didn’t want to get you involved in this, Alec,” Maryse told him, “but we couldn’t let you take over as Head of the Institute without telling you now that we know Valentine is sending people here to look for the Mortal Cup.”

“All right,” Alec said, needing to focus on what needed to be done and not on his parents’ confession. “Do you know anything about where the Circle thinks the Mortal Cup might be?”

Maryse shook her head. “No. Some of my sources aren’t even convinced the Cup itself is in New York. They think maybe Valentine is only looking for a person who knows the Cup’s location.”

“Then I guess we’ll just have to find the Mortal Cup before the Circle does,” Alec said. Which should be fun on top of everything else he’d been dealing with.

“That would be for the best,” Robert told him, “and if you can keep an eye out for Circle activity in the area and report back to us, too, that would be a great help.”

“To you,” Alec said flatly. “Not to the Council.”

Maryse shook her head. “We still aren’t certain that there are no Circle members on the Council, and we can’t risk Valentine finding out that we have eyes on him. You’ll need to send your reports directly to the two of us, and to Consul Penhallow.”

“Not Inquisitor Herondale?” Alec asked. “Isn’t she a part of this, too?”

“Imogen can be...” Maryse tilted her head, considering her words, “a bit intense when it comes to matters involved Valentine and the Circle. Consul Penhallow has found it’s better to loop her in to information only when we have concrete facts and a course of action planned.”

“Great,” Alec said. “You don’t just want me to keep secrets from the Council, but from the people who are helping you keep your secrets.” He shook his head in exhaustion. “Is there anything else I need to know?”

“There is one more thing,” Robert said. “Valentine’s return and Consul Dieudonné’s betrayal are the reason we pushed for updating the Accords. The four of us spoke about it at length and agreed that the best way to keep from having to face both the Circle and a Downworld revolt at the same time, which there undoubtedly would be if the Downworlders ever found out about the extent to which the Circle has managed to infiltrate the governing body of the Clave, was to solidify our relationship with the Downworld as best as possible.”

“The marriage written into the Accords,” Alec said, understanding dawning. “That’s why you were both so outspoken in your support of it.”

Robert nodded. “And now that Valentine is making a move to find the Mortal Cup, finalizing the new Accords is more important than ever. Which is why the Consul has convinced the Council that your marriage should take place next week, before the signing of the revised Accords.”

“Next week?” For the first time since he entered the office, Alec felt something besides anger. He couldn’t get married in a week. He’d barely even gotten used to the idea that he was supposed to marry Magnus, although admittedly, talking to Magnus had helped. There was something about having someone try to talk him out of a thing that made it so much easier for Alec to recognize why he wanted to do it. Still, a week was far too soon. “I thought we’d have more time. A month or two, at least.”

“Well, it’s not like you’re planning an actual wedding,” Maryse said with a wave of her hand. “This is a purely political transaction. It just needs to be a good show so that the Accords are solid once they’re signed.”

But that was the problem, wasn’t it? That this was a political transaction, but it was with Magnus, and Magnus had said...

“Fine,” Alec said. “Is there anything else?”

“No,” Robert answered. “But if you want to talk more about any of this—”

“I don’t,” Alec said, moving to his desk. “If you don’t mind, I have things to do, and I remember Jace saying something about the two of you needing to get back to Alicante.”

Maryse sighed. “All right, Alec. But we will talk about this again when you’re ready.”

“Don’t count on that being any time soon.”

[goldtinged]

                         EMMA CARSTAIRS  //  A  CRASH  COURSE

            ❝  kit  thought  about  emma  with  her  sword,  emma  saving  his  life.                  emma  hugging  cristina  and  looking  at  julian  like  he  hung  the  moon  ❞

CONTEXT

emma cordelia carstairs is a character appearing within cassandra clare’s shadowhunter universe. she is a shadowhunter (half angel, half human warriors mandated to protect the world from demons)

she appears as the central character in THE DARK ARTIFICES, a trilogy published in 2016. 

She also appears in THE MORTAL INSTRUMENTS, specifically as a side character in city of heavenly fire (book 6). she is 12 years old during the events of the original trilogy

If you’ve seen shadowhunters  TV - she does not appear in the show but some people related to her do. JEM CARSTAIRS (aka brother zachariah) is her uncle and HELEN BLACKTHORN is the sister of her parabatai, Julian. 

CONTEXT PT 2: IMPORTANT EVENTS / TERMS

the dark war: civil war between shadowhunter factions which led to the destruction of large swarths of shadowhunter society and the death of family families. Emma’s parents (supposedly) died in the dark war. evil side is led by Jonathan Morgenstern. This shit is basically based off of Harry Potter so just think deathly hallows adkakd

the endarkened: shadowhunter’s who were turned from angelic to demonic, and became part of Jonathan’s army. Some did so by choice, others by force. 

the clave: shadowhunter government, whose seat is in Idris. Idris is the shadowhunter capital, a small city hidden somewhere between france and germany that cannot be accessed by non-shadowhunters. all the good characters hate the clave (and rightly so)

downworlders: name givern to non shadowhunters. eg, werewolves, vampires, warlocks fae ect. 

the cold peace: a policy enacted by the clave at the end of the dark war, that punished faerie’s for supporting Jonathan Morgenstern. Leads to the exile of shadowhunters with fae heritage, regardless of their allegiance during the war. it makes interacting with faerie’s illegal.  basically any character who is decent fucking hates this policy

parabatai: soldiers who take a vow to become twinned and fight side by side until death.  After the vow they are bound together magically for life. It is physically painful to be apart from one another, and the pain of losing a parabatai is considered to be unendurable. They are closer than siblings, and fairly rare within the shadowhunter world.  it is illegal for them to fall in love and doing so is punishable under the strongest laws. eg, stripping of runes and exile

BASICS:

Emma was born in 1995. Her parents are John and Cordelia Carstairs. She emigrated to Los Angeles at the beginning of the Dark War as her parents wanted to help assist the Shadowhunter’s they knew there. 

She was raised alongside The Blackthorn family, training at the institute they run. Her childhood best friend is Julian Blackthorn. 

Emma is a skilled shadowhunter, regarded by some to be the best of her generation, and the successor to Jace Herondale of the title. 

She is the current owner of Cortana, a shortsword held within the Carstairs family, forged by Wayland the Smith, it is said to be one of the great swords and therefore is her most valued possession

SKILLS + ATTRIBUTES + RANDOM CHARACTERISATIONS:

extremely dedicated and driven. is considered the best not because of her raw talent but because of how hard she trains. considers the same for herself, she cares most about being good so that when the time comes to enact revenge for her parents she will be successful

distant within the blackthorn family: although she grew up with them, and they consider her their extra sister, emma does not feel comfortable within the family. partially because she misses her own, partially because she believes they don’t consider her family. always refers to them as “julian’s family” “julian’s siblings”. realises by the end of the series she is integral to the blackthorns and how much she loves them / allows herself to be loved by them

funny and blunt: she is sarcastic, both as a means of deflecting attention but also because it’s her sense of humour. she is extremely blunt, bad at lying, and will pretty much always just say what she thinks. not one to maintain relationships she doesn’t value

she is confident and outspoken, especially in terms of her sexuality

skill with music is a family trait but emma can’t play the violin for shit which makes her feel bad. 

FAMILY:

Her biological family: John and Cordelia Carstairs (parents, deceased), James Carstairs (uncle), Mina Carstairs (cousin)

Her adopted family: The Blackthorns

consisting of;

Mark and Helen Blackthorn: the eldest Blackthorn siblings, half siblings to the rest. They are both half faerie, half shadowhunter. Both are exiled at the end of the Dark War as part of The Cold Peace (a policy to punish all fae for the involvement of faerie in working against Shadowhunters)

Julian Blackthorn: the eldest sibling living in the family home during the war. He is Emma’s parabatai

Ty and Livvy Blackthorn: twins, two years younger than Julian. 

Dru Blackthorn: the youngest girl, four years younger than Emma and Julian

Tavvy Blackthorn: the baby of the family

OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIPS:

Cristina Rosales: Emma’s best friend, who is on a trip to LA from Mexico during the event of the series (international postings are part of shadowhunter training)

Jem Carstairs: her uncle and the only living Carstairs left beside herself (until his daughter Mina is born). 

Tessa Gray: a powerful warlock, Jem’s wife

Clary Fairchild: also her best friend and a mentor. Clary helped her and Julian after the war

Jace Herondale: her mentor and someone she admires

Kit Herondale: Comes to live with the family during the events of the book. He and Emma relate to feeling both family to and separated from The Blackthorns.  Sidenote, kit is a legend and I love him

Cameron Ashdown: Emma’s on and off again boyfriend

Diana Wrayburn: tutor at the institute, only person in the series with braincells. 

CRASH COURSE OF THE EVENTS OF THE SERIES

CITY OF HEAVENLY FIRE + THE NOVELLAS //

emma and julian become parabatai, so that emma isn’t sent to the shadowhunter academy (school for war orphans lol)

We could—” he started, then stopped, swallowed, and started again. “We could become parabatai.” He said it shyly, half-turning his face away from her, so that the shadows partially hid his expression. “Then they couldn’t separate us,” he added. “Not ever.” Emma felt her heart turn over. “Jules, being parabatai is a big deal,” she said. “It’s—it’s forever.” He looked at her, his face open and guileless. There was no trickery in Jules, no darkness. “Aren’t we forever?” he asked  

julian kills his father in the dark war after he is endarkened, to protect his siblings. the clave puts him through a gruelling trial that turns both emma and julian against the clave, embedding a deep seed of resentment and mistrust that fuels a lot of their actions through the rest of the series

julian’s uncle takes over the institute but unknown to everyone, he’s mentally unable to manage it. julian starts running the institute age 12, in secret, so that his family can stay together. emma does not know about this

LADY MIDNIGHT //

emma discovers the body of faerie children, murdered in the same way as her parents were. She always suspected her parents weren’t killed in the war, but killed under the cover of the war. she begins to investigate the murders, and hopes she can enact the revenge she has dreamed of fulfilling

meanwhile, a faerie contingent who have also heard about the murders ask for emma’s help solving them. Because this is illegal, they offer to return Mark Blackthorn to the family in exchange for the shadowhunters help

meanwhile meanwhile, emma and julian realise they are in love and they fuck, even though that is ALSO illegal because parabatai cannot fall in love with each other (though no one knows why). their powers start to change as their feelings for eachother grow

emma solves her parents murder. she kills the person who killed them but realises she gets no satisfaction from it. too late realises she’s based her whole life around getting revenge and now she has nothing

emma talks to jem about the parabatai law and finds out it’s illegal because there is a curse that becomes active when parabatai fall in love. emma thinks the reason her and julian’s powers are changing is because the curse is starting

she receives some frankly terrible advice from tessa and decides to make julian fall out of love with her by breaking his heart

does so by telling him she’s dating his brother, mark

asks mark to fake the relationship, mark in turn offers they just date for real, which she goes for. END BOOK

LORD OF SHADOWS //

emma and mark are dating but it’s fallen back into fake dating because they realise they’re better friends and, mark is in a love triangle between his ex fairy boyfriend and cristina

eventually when emma is sure julian sufficiently resents her they stage a massive break-up

this is a whole ass book of emma and julian angst,,,,, and it’s delicious

julian finds out about the curse and why emma lied and he’s mad, but also, he can’t fully be mad because the curse is deFINITELY WORKING NOW

back to the actual plot: a group of pro cold war supported with extreme anti-downworld takes (they are legit just fantasy fascists) start to rise to power within the clave. honestly there is way more actual plot but it’s not relevant to this blog or emma’s characterisation so moving on

back to emma and julian: they come up with a plan to deal with the curse. emma will beg the inquisitor to exile her but not strip her runes in exchange for them not telling everyone paratabai are cursed which he agrees to

UNTIL ..... the cohort initiate violence during a clave trial and the inquisitor is killed. so is julian’s little sister, livvy. END BOOK

QUEEN OF AIR AND DARKNESS //

i hate this book so there’s that

the leader of the cohort is made inquisitor and starts enacting shitty policies

julian is worried about the curse and how it’s starting to affect him so he just goes and gets all his emotions removed and so he feels nothing for anyone

ty spends the book bullying kit into helping him bring livvy back from the dead (AND IT WORKS LOL)

800 pages of bullshit I don’t have time to get into

the curse comes to fruition, turning emma and julian into giant nephilim with great powers but no feelings (think like, aang in the avatar state) they basically nearly kill everyone but then their family saves them

conveniently, the heavenly fire burns off their parabatai runes thus solving their problem

the cohort take control of the capital in protest of alec lightwood getting made inquisitor. all the shadowhunters who aren’t weirdos abandon the city

helen blackthorn is allowed to return and she decides to take over running the institute, freeing julian from his obligation

emma and julian decide to go travelling the world and the series ends

EMMA + JULIAN:

they are a MESS but I love them. 

essentially, they know each other better than anyone. emma understands the pressure julian is under, the weight on his shoulders, his insecurities but also his strengths. julian see’s how emma puts on a facade of strength, gives her a safe space to be vulnerable, and provides a haven of unconditional love

used to sleep in the same bed as kids to help with nightmares, developed a system of communication only they understand, tell eachother everything (until lady midnight anyway)

emma understands how much of his life revolves around his family because hers does too

“you don’t have to do this for me” emma was saying, softly but earnestly, in a voice cristina had never heard her use before“I think I do” julian said “I think I  remember making a vow to that effect”“whither thou goest, I will go, whatever stupid thing you do, I will also do? was that the vow”

I LOVE THEM!!

best friends to lovers EXCELLENCE

THIS is the biggest crash course ever and I hope it makes sense. It’s hard to condense so much information not only from the books (and each is like 800 pages) but also from the entire world and lore. But I hope this helps somewhat and I’m always willing to answer questions for anyone who has any. 

[erchommai-a]

timeline + 1

timeline meme / the timeline in which they live an ideal life, had no opportunities taken from them, were subjected to nothing terrible, where they grew up to fulfill their full potential.

Somewhere out there is a world where Valentine Morgenstern’s Father didn’t die. Somewhere he didn’t have to watch as his own Father, taken over by the lycanthropy, take his own life with the very same blade he had promised to give him on his Ascension. No, he comes home with some scratches. 

The wolf dies

And there is no seed of deep hatred and resentment left to grow in the man’s chest. There is no rallying for a movement  that goes far and beyond normal sentiments of the youth. There is no outright call for war. Nothing to push the Circle into anything more than a group of young shadowhunters with some wild belief that they could change their world. 

And somehow, Jonathan isn’t born by necessity. 

He isn’t born to be the weapon his Father needed to breed a new line of shadowhunters. 

No, it happened because they were young and in love and full of life. That the thought of not being with each other seemed all too much. And the fruits of that affection and adoration was a young boy with pale hair like his Father and green eyes like his mother. 

Oskar Morgenstern named their first boy for them. 

Jonathan like their kind’s name sake. Honorable. Strong. Born to be a warrior. Like all Morgensterns were. 

He grows up next to the Herondales and the Lightwoods. He grows up following Luke around when Valentine was away with his own Father and the Clave and Jocelyn was busy painting in the free space behind the Fairchild Manor. 

He’d be carried around on his shoulders and treated like a prince until the other kids would come around and then he was king. Marching around like his Father. Big and tall and brave for a three year old. 

But things changed not long after that. 

Luke stopped coming around. His Father was always busy, hiding away and his Mom was scared. Scared for him. Scared for her husband. And scared of what his Father might think of the new child on the way. 

His Father starts taking him along into meetings. Meetings where he can see his Father and his grandfather standing side by side, shouting things and names and being angry. He remembers his Mom having told him once how they both hated his grandfather. It’s why he hasn’t been to their home since he was a baby. But he’s everywhere his Dad takes him, always with his hand on his shoulder. 

A few nights of this and he finds himself being stirred awake in the morning. 

Jocelyn with a bundle of his clothes in her arms and a few other things. She thrusts a stele and a sword in his hand. He holds onto the sword more than his own mother. His Father had taught him how to use it. The scars were still fresh from their last training. There were a lot more after his Grandfather had invited himself in on their training sessions. 

He asked where they were going. It was too early. His Father would be too tired again from one of their meetings to come with them this early. 

But his mother doesn’t answer. 

Not until they’re outside and they’re on the horse and she finally smiles with some relief. A kiss to his hair and he understood why. Luke stood not too far beyond the clearing. Different. Tired. Hairy. Still Luke. 

And they both say they were going away for a while. 

He asks about his Dad again and for some reason he knew then and there, he might not see the man again. Or his friends. Or Idris. 

He asked his mom why and all he told him then was they had to. 

And for some reason or another, he trusted his mother. 

----

Years later and they’re in New York. He’s waking up to Clary singing in the bathroom and the smell of coffee beans and pancakes from the kitchen. A look around confirms it was home. 

Home as it will ever be. 

He feels for the blade under his pillow. The one he’s never let go of. And Luke teaches him during weekends still how to use it while his Mom taught Clary about the runes once she was old enough to ask. 

Jon never preferred the sword. Maybe because it still reminded him of his Dad. Maybe because he could control it better. Maybe because he can’t draw for shit. Either way, it helped to offer him some peace of mind. 

They’ve only met a few bad seeds when they were younger. Mostly downworlders who were cornered into a bad position. Some Shadowhunters looking still for something that his Mother wouldn’t tell him about. Sometimes they just get a gift. 

It’s wrapped up with the seal. 

This year it was a ring. Addressed to him for his Birthday. 

He thinks its from his Grandmother. Jocelyn’s convinced it’s from Valentine. And she thinks it might be time to move again. 

Jon wanted to go to college in New York. 

Somewhere close. Somewhere he could be on his own but still a cab ride away should they need him. That was what normal kids did anyway. 

As he hears a squeal coming out from the bathroom, he figured they really weren’t normal anyway. 

--------

The first week without his Mom was the hardest. He’s never been out of her sight or her out of his for very long since they’d been on his own. And he’d never had to hold Clary’s hand so tightly as they ran to the first bus stop out of town. 

That was always the plan. 

Run until they couldn’t run any more. 

Never leave Clary behind. 

Never leave the box of baby things. 

That was the larger rule of the two. 

He knew why but he still didn’t understand it. He had opened it with Clary when they were younger. There was nothing but a few tarot cards and some of their old baby things. He just knew he had to trust her. 

If his Mom said it was important, it just had to be. 

It wasn’t long, however until they got caught by some kids. Or what looked to be kids. They had to be. But then a flicker of their blades and he realizes they’re shadowhunters. 

Like them. 

Except they looked better and somehow had better gear. 

They didn’t last long in the fight. Firstly, they were outnumbered. And secondly, they had more gear in their quiver than the two of them combined. One look at him confirmed who he was. The ring they found in his pocket only added the garote around his neck. 

Clary was the one that convinced them they were innocent. 

That they needed to run. 

----

They’re taken in.

They learn the Shadowhunter World isn’t as dark as his mom might have left it. It isn’t as scary as they’ve been taught to believe. And still different from whatever of his memory managed to tell him. 

It’s his Father and his government. His puppets and his strings that was keeping their world in the dark. That was making sure the prejudice and the fear was what stayed rather than the real mantra that had build their species to begin with. Good versus Evil. Angels verus demons. Now it had been Angels versus everyone else. 

Or what counted as Angels in his mind. 

It was sickening. 

They stayed hidden, for as long as they could, but things changed when Luke was brought in. Marched and paraded around. Clary practically jumped at the first opportunity to go through a portal to get to him. 

That didn’t end well. 

The Portal closed before any of the others could follow. They were practically drowning in the middle of a lake. And it only took a flash of memory for him to remember what his Father had told him about this once when he was young. 

“Don’t swallow the water! “ He yelped, gulped and drank, ruefully. Dragging her, only by the collar of her jacket onto the shore where the hallucinations almost immediately begun. He could hardly differentiate where his moans and groans stopped and where was Clary. 

How they managed to stay on a bed, he couldn’t be sure. 

He thinks he saw green before his eyes closed completely and darkness took over. 

By the time he woke up, it had been three days since and there was an empty bed beside him. His panic took over as he fumbled for the sword that was no longer on his person. And he walked, weaponless out of the room to find himself somewhat recognizing the place. 

He was only three. But his Father had took him here too. During one of their nightly meetings. 

He sees a portrait on the wall before he sees Clary sitting on a couch, all kempt and unlike herself. 

A few more steps and it showed a face next to what he realized now was Valentine at a young age. 

“ Grandmother. “ 

Clary confirmed it with a nod, tugging on his sleeve when he was within reach and prompted him to sit beside her. She was nervous and uncertain. As they both were. And from the looks of  one of the chairs, they had already scuffled before he had woken  up. 

“ Where are our things? “

“ She took them away for safe keeping. “ Clary interrupted the old woman before she could answer. Her eyes now fixed on the ring on his hand, similar to hers. 

“ If you two were raised like you were supposed to, I wouldn’t have had the chance. “ She retorted, finally allowed to speak, as her fingers played with her own Morgenstern ring. “ I knew you would use that. It was the best way I could find you two without your Mother. Your family’s been waiting for the two of you. “

Now it had been his turn to feel clammy and shocked. He hadn’t thought of bumping into either of the Morgenstern men so soon. 

He tried to look around subtly for anything he could use. Luke might not have been as fast or as strong as Valentine but he still taught him enough. He trusted that gut instinct. But whatever plans of escape he was concocting fell out of place when he saw him come in through the door. He hears the gasp come from Clar right beside him. 

Jocelyn had always noted how much he looked like him as he grew older and perhaps it had only been made apparent now. 

“ Dad, “ He hears her whisper. Partly in shock. It’s instinct then that he stood up, walking slowly just to stand in between him and Clary. His Mom’s voice still loud in his ear. 

Run. 

But he was too frozen in the moment to move. Too slow to think. Still staring at his Father. At the ache he somehow felt in his chest again, the very same ache he’d felt when he understood they weren’t ever going to see him again. It hardly registers that Clary had ran ahead of him, arm flung around their Father’s waist and head in his chest. He blinks and it still doesn’t register. An image that his mind couldn’t seem to process until Valentine was gently pushing her back. The same Fatherly instinct he remember. The same tenderness that quickly hardened when the Morgenstern Patriarch walked into the room. 

He got motion back into his limbs again. And he reached for Clary’s elbow while they weren’t looking to catch a view of the grin on her face and the blade she very quietly thrusts into his palm. Holding back the smile of relief he slips it behind his back onto his other hand. His right arm having the better throw and pointed with his chin to the near by window. 

Jace had done it once before. They could too. 

Before his grandfather could even speak, he aimed and thew the dagger at her shoulder. It him her right where the ligament would be cut off and pushed Clary out the window. 

Her first and him second. 

Making sure to leave the morgenstern ring on the window sill.

------

They run until they couldn’t run anymore. And they walk until Clary’s legs feel sore. He picks her up, carries her on his back, until he thinks she’s fallen asleep. He asks and she tugs on his hair as an answer. 

“ Gremlin, “ He uttered weakly under his breath. 

Alicante was still far off in the distance when a familiar place came into view. 

“ Hey, TIny, Wake up. It’s our old house. “ He stopped at that, realizing telling his little sister she was conceived here was too far. Although correct. She wriggles against his grip until he puts her down and walked ahead of him. Getting a good look of the place. 

He wasn’t sure if it was abandoned but it definitely didn’t look as lived in as he remembered. The drapes were  closed and the vines were everywhere. Leaves crumpled and died on the ground where they fell. And there was an air around it that made it feel like they were walking hollowed ground. 

They should probably get back to the city. Maybe they’ll find the others already there. Luke’s life was still in danger. 

But the more they walked, the harder the pull was to stay. 

And from the looks of it, he had no choice once Clary had opened the door and stepped in. 

He hissed a warning. Their Dad might have alreayd sent some guards ahead or worse. But it was quiet. Empty. There was a faint fire in the fire place as they passed it by. Close to dying. There were empty bottles of wine scattered all around. 

He had wanted to go up. Show her his bedroom. Showed her where hers had meant to go. But she had already disappeared into the cellar by the time he was just about to reach for her. 

A curse and he chased after her.

Nearly bumping into her as she comes to a stop. A faint glowing light chained to the wall. It’s wings thin and frail. Two chairs set on either side of it. 

It moved it’s head and it spoke ; an almost garbled static noise. But Clary hears it. From the way she looks at the thing. He only hears faint words, shapes of what it should be without the sound. Eventually Clary fumbles forward, trying to undo the chains, eventually asking for his help. 

He doesn’t question it. Looks around for the keys until he finds it . And as they key turns and the lock falls out of place, with his wings spread, he glows with a blinding light that makes both fo them turn their head away and cover it. The air around the house different. 

“ I know what he wants, “ Clary announced. “ We need to go back. “ 

Jon makes some sweeping arguments but she was already on her way out and back to where they had come from. 

With the retreating figure of Alicante fading and fading behind them, he knew he had lost the battle. 

-------

They come knocking at the door, much to Seraphina’s surprise. Suspicious as she makes sure yet again they were not armed. Although that took a lot longer now he imagined with her arm in a sling. They arrived just in time for dinner  and was brought to their chairs with his Father at the head, many of his guards around them and his Grandfather on his side and their grandmother on Clary’s. 

Food was served with wine and he realized only then how hungry he must have been. That he didn’t stop to think twice and just eat. 

All the while discussion continued around the table. His Father’s guests paid neither him or Clary any mind, not until Valentine addressed them again. And Clary, jumps in with the obvious question: “We want our Mom. “

He swallows a mouthful and agreed, taking one of the knives on the table to hide inside his sleeve should they need it again. A look between the adults passed and Valentine nodded and got up. 

“ The only way we would ever consider to release her is if she gave up what she had stolen from our people. “

“ I know where the cup is. “

Jonathan tries not to blink his surprise. He looks unfazed by the admittance, although he should have come to expect it, given the circumstances that had pushed them here to begin with. 

“ But I need her awake.  Give her to us. And we’ll come back with the cup. “

He caught his grandparents smile. Although his grandfather’s was more out of amusement than the pride he caught on Seraphina’s. 

“ Jocelyn is still considered a war criminal. She can’t leave just like that. We’ll need a guarantee. Collateral, so to speak. “

Clary fumbles then. She hadn’t thought that far ahead. 

“ You want a head for a head. “ All their eyes turned to him then, sharply and calculating. Seeing perhaps for the first time the similarity between Father and son. He looked up at the house sigil that clung to a shield just at the end of the room. “ A Morgenstern for a morgenstern. “ 

He catches Clary’s look but doesn’t say anything. 

“ Release Lucian Garroway along with our Mother and I’ll stay. Just until you get the cup. “

Clary’s knuckles turn white gripping the edge of the table. His Father and grand father looked pleased. The rest of the guest depart then to leave the family to their peace. 

“ She can have an armored guard with her return back to the City. Your friends must be worried about you. “ His Father starts. 

“ If you break your promise, I swear by the angel, I will kill you. “ Clary swore before she got up. 

Jon smiles then as he got up too to give her a hug before she was ushered away, promising him along the way that she’ll come back. He didn’t doubt that. But he glared at the guards that tried to drag her away anyway. 

“ Now what do all of you really want with me? “

---------

They want someone to continue the line. An heir. His eyes narrowed at his reflection at that, finding the idea laughable. 

First of all, he was just seventeen. 

Plus, he may or may like Izzy, and he was pretty sure Izzy wouldn’t be into some crazy dictator’s son / potential dictator. 

But he smiled and nodded, politely. 

He remembers enough of his training to know how to act around his Dad. He was three then but he hadn’t changed. The very next morning he was put back to work. His skills sharpened. Brought to what it should have been had his mother not stolen him away - blah de blah. 

It had been easier to tune him out once he’d handed him the sword. His blade. The one he had given to him as a child. 

That was what was familiar after all. 

He could manage against his own man. 

That impressed him. 

And a part of him still appreciated that he could be impressed. Even by him. But it was small and it disappeared as quickly as it would sprout. 

----

It only takes a few days of this before he gets bored. 

A few days  of incessant training for his body to start aching and for him to start wondering where the hell Clary was. 

It felt longer than it should have been and his Father had stopped giving him updates by the second day. 

It’s on the seventh night that he wakes up in the middle of the night again, stirred by his Father and brought down. There’s more people then. All allies from the excited looks in their eyes. 

He should run. He knew it. But there was no exit. 

He’s been led right into the center of it; forced to his knees by Father and grandfather. The cup now being passed along from one hand to another. His Father had lied. Of course. And now they held the cup with what he could only guess was blood. Because it smelled and looked different. Not like ichor. Not even as bad. 

His eyes snap upward, trying to get a view of Valentine and Oskar’s hooded gaze and he thinks he catches a flciker of a woman wil pale skin and dark eyes and long hair at the edge of the room. She smiles with blood red lips and fangs and then disappears when there’s a noise.

A yel from someone being stabbed. He catches gold hair and then an arrow. Maybe more. He tries to get free but their grip is still firm and Valentine grabs his jaw to make him drink from it. He bites down on the edge of the cup instead and make it tip over on him, before taking the chance in their distraction to bite at his grandfather’s hand. 

A hard slap makes him swallow of the blood that had tipped over into his mouth. Oskar’s and the cup’s. He almost retched right and there. And again, he’s dragged, this time by his hair to the nearest door. And before he knows it he’s knocked out. 

----

He wakes up again, groggy and aching all over. Back in the moors behind his childhood home. His wrists tied together behind his back. His head ringing still from the head ache the blow to his head had brought. And the lady in black, still watching from the distance. 

And he sees her clearer than everything else, the more he stares at her. 

But the moment doesn’t last long as he hears his Father begin to talk. Whether he’s explaining it to him or to the air, it didn’t seem to matter. He had a plan. Or they all did. A collective group of people where he was their leader, their king. They knew how to save the world. How to keep out the demons. How to fight every demon blooded thing in the universe. 

It would all start with the cup. 

That would fix all the problems. 

And then him. 

He thinks he hears her smile, feels it right next to his ear, but he can’t be sure. They must have made him drink some of the blood. He could feel it, a sluggish weight in his veins. Burning him rotten. Making him weak. And making his fingers clammy. 

Valentine is still talking. Some nonsense about angels and demons. Something about how he was going to continue his legacy. Be some king down there while he ruled the people here. It was harder and harder to pay attention, if he was honest. All he could hear was the sweet voice of whatever that woman was, singing in his ear.

He almost didn’t register the thud that fell right beside him. He rolled his head to the other side and saw his grand father dead beside him. He nearly laughed. 

The haze fading. In it wake an almost seizing high. A hurricane that goes right to his nerve endings. Somehow, he breaks through the ropes. And there are inks of black under his eyes but there isn’t any fear in his Father’s eyes. 

Now faced with both his children. 

Clary’s concern only distracted him for a moment ; not enough to stop him from catching the blade she had stolen from their Grandfather for him. He had heard the name before. He had already given it to Valentine once before. He thought to ask why he had taken it back but a glance over his shoulder reminded him the man was dead and the reason was moot. 

Valentine tries to reason with either of them ; tries to warn them. But they were having none of it. They were tired of the running. They were tired of the lies. They were tired of him. 

The cup falls to the grass just as his blade cuts through his spine and Clary’s pierces through lung and heart. 

Whatever he was about to say, dies on his bloodied lips. 

-----

The haze of the demon blood eventually dwindled back to that heavy ache straight in his bones. An emptiness that left him passing out on their way to catch up with the others. 

He wakes up a few times on that first night in a cold sweat. The dark in his eyes seemingly never leaving. Leaving him with a hunger for the feeling, for the taste, for the voice he’d heard in the moor. 

It’s a few days until he’s almost caught with a blade to Luke’s throat when they realize what was wrong. 

It was Lilith, Seraphina had told them before slashing her own throat at the very first opportunity she had at freedom. 

Jocelyn somehow knew who that was and clutched his hand. He had only remembered her holding it that tightly when they were leaving. She finally explained to him why. 

But the answer to the threat of lilith was simpler now than it had been then. Protection spells and weapons were readily available. 

The old regime was being pushed out. A new one was starting. 

The Last of the Morgensterns were dead. 

It was just them now. 

[lamalefix]

Pulvis et umbra natura renovantur integra - ch. 3

read this work on ao3

[ch1; ch2]

  The silence that follows his statement doesn’t surprise him that much. Perhaps saying it aloud was a bad idea, because now Magnus could swear to hear the sound of his own heart rumbling in the corridor, resonating between the walls.

He knows, what it means to be hunted by the Clave. All the Downworlders know it, many can say that they have undergone terrible treatments, if not tortures, in certain dark centuries in which the Nephilim used the heads of warlocks and werewolves, mainly, as terrible decorative choices for their walls. Stuffed with straw like animals that you could find in a taxidermy. There are those who might say they didn’t risk their skin, not having fight openly against the Shadowhunters, to see their rights recognized, in a peace of paper that wasn’t really a peace. And Accords after Accordss, somehow, they have arrived at a sort of stasis. And then there was Alec who changed everything.

Here, however, what is happening in that cell is a transformation that the Clave can’t accept. A transformation that probably also crosses that thin line between the possible and the impossible that legends are. Legends like them.

If the Clave discovered what’s happening to Alec, especially in this moment of change, in this moment in which progress is being made and peace is not just a side note, something that is present only on paper and is enshrined in the Accords, now that Nephilim and their minds are changing, now that their ideas are changing, if the Clave discovers that Alec is becoming something different, something that isn’t included in their usual categorization, he would be taken and thrown into the darkest of prisons; and that change that his life, his personality is bringing would end up in oblivion.

The Clave would hunt him down, lock him up and study him in every part. And Magnus doesn’t want to think about the specific name of this practice, that the thought alone sends a chill down his spine. And then he clenches his fists and holds his breath and tries not to look at the young, so very young Nephilim in front of him. It’s indeed a good thing that the Angel allows the ascension of very few of them, and that in that Institute there is only the Lightwood family and their immediate kinsmen: the hunt is not open yet and with a little luck, and many spells, maybe Magnus can still find a solution.

A dull and piercing cry from the cell calls him back from his thoughts. He must hurry. He moves again to gain that thick runed door. The steps that become heavy like his thoughts.

Isabelle’s voice stops him, though. “What's going on, Magnus?”.

And he doesn’t know whether to turn around, if he is stretching a half smile. He just shrugs.

“Isn't this your magic?” Simon asks, and maybe it’s not a question it’s a statement. “I thought he had activated the Alliance rune, really... I thought... I don't know, it seemed like your magic.” he then murmurs and takes a long, loud gulp from his cup of coffee.

And it’s at that point that Magnus turns around and wants to ask him more information about it but Simon continues.

“I didn’t even realize you were on the ground, it seemed like you were fighting with him... I wrote this in the report. He was all zap, bang, slam, chop” he keeps saying waving his hand. “He seemed to be fighting with you by his side”.

“I also thought the same, that he had activated the rune, in the end it seemed to make sense, doesn't it?” Jace nods . “When he reached you, then, it’s like he gave you back the magic... I don’t know if it sounds right…”.

Magnus remains speechless for a moment. It isn’t strange that they don’t know it, that legend. It’s older than Elphas the Unsteady in person, so it’s easy to assume it got lost in popular folklore stories and disappeared almost completely from Clave’s records. Ragnor had a theory: some of the warlocks who fought the demons and who disappeared into oblivion, were through and through mundane and not some demon spawn. But before he can begin to tell the legend there is something else that gets his attention: Alec used magic, he used a magic that was certainly not Magnus’ own, and he used it there on the battlefield. “Impossible.” he finally says, the heavy tone that perhaps doesn't even make the idea of how serious this thing is. It could have been an eventuality if that fog wasn’t there, if those lightning bolts didn’t cross the darkness in that cell, if Magnus hadn’t been on the ground, more dead than alive.

“Impossible?” Jace repeats .

Magnus turns his eyes, sighing. It’s too late. He can only look for a way to slow down the process, he can no longer avoid it. Maybe, maybe he can find a way to make it less painful, to make it less terrible for Alec. If he has already used magic, it’s too late. The runes will disappear. Or maybe his body won’t hold the transformation. Too much eventuality, too little time.

“Magnus?” Isabelle calls him making him come to his senses.

“My magic was─I was dying. That wasn’t my magic. And he... he─” Magnus shakes his head and freezes. He must have the certainty, weighted and perfect, he can’t say it aloud because it’s even scary to think of it. “Stay out of it, okay? It’s useless for you to enter,” he adds and gives them a sufficiently eloquent look. “Right now it's dangerous”.

“But you should rest,” Simon replies, a bit worried. “I mean Catarina said it. And we all know she’ll kick our asses, in the least figurative way, if you don't”.

Magnus gives him a smile. And he doesn’t even know how convincing it can be. “I’m the only one who can help him, though. I try not to die in the process, okay? It would be a pity to throw away all the precious energy that Isabelle gave me”.

“Explain, please.” says Isabelle. And it looks like a prayer. “Tell us, tell us what’s going on”.

Magnus sucks a breath between his clenched teeth, the pain radiating from his chest isn’t only physical, it is more emotional. It’s as if his heart was gripped in a vice, bloody and violent.

How could he explain what’s going on inside that cell, or more precisely inside Alexander?

With all his enormous property of language, with all the languages he knows, he wouldn’t be able to explain it even with all his good will. He would translate it into a handful of words: it’s a big fucking mess.

He swallows, crushes the tongue on the palate. And his mouth tastes ferrous and kneaded by blood and tiredness, he rubs the tip of his tongue between his teeth.

“Magnus? Can you explain?” Isabelle asks.

He moistens his lips nervously, clenches a fist and sighs again, trying to ignore the other twinge of pain that climbs up his rib cage. “Alec is... changing, okay?” he says looking at the sister of his love, and trying to make this step as painless as possible. “Please think carefully about what happened, don’t call anyone, don’t report ... not until I can stabilize this situation and I can give you some more reliable information. Because this thing, if that’s what I think, has never happened before, or at least not that there is someone besides one of the ancient warlocks, and some long-lived fae that really has memory of it”.

“Magnus…” she keeps saying, her big dark eyes fixed on his, and then she shakes her head. She doesn’t need to say anything else. It says be careful, that look, it says save him, it says help him. Please. Please. Please. And many other things.

Magnus just tilts his head a little and then looks at Jace.

“I'll go in too,” he says, handing Clary his coffee . “I am coming in with you, he’s my responsibility. He’s my parabatai”.

Magnus moves his hand to open the cell door. “If it gets bad, get out. Immediately. I have to look after him, I can’t worry for you too”.

A swirl of black fog invades the corridor. Magnus remains motionless for a moment, the wave of negative emotions slapping his face. The darkness is dense and thick and tarnishes his eyes. It weighs on him like the heat in August. It sticks his clothes, like mud.

Magnus then moves one step and then another. Jace moving behind him closes the cell door.

It’s hard to breathe in there, and if Magnus hadn’t inherited his eyes from his father, those eyes that he so despises on certain days, he wouldn’t know how to orient himself in that black fog.

Jace is behind him, his senses enchanted and enhanced by the runes are certainly more useful than expected at this moment. “We didn't close him in here,” he says suddenly, the voice that sounds hesitant like a whisper. “He came here of his own free will...”.

Magnus nods his head. It was to be expected from Alec. He was probably sufficiently lucid to understand that something wasn’t going well inside him. Locking himself up there was the most sensible choice he could make: to minimize the danger for those around him.

Something moves in the darkness, a black shadow, which has appendages, legs and arms, a head and a thick puff of something blacker than the mist, it’s clearly the indomitable hair in which Magnus loves to slide his fingers, it moves. Lightning bolting from one side of the cell to the other. The grunts, the growls grow louder and deeper, vibrate between the stone walls of the cell.

There is a smell of blood, in there, of sulphur and ichor.

Alexander is clearly hurt, and even from how his breathing breaks, it is clear that he is badly injured. But he continues to move in the darkness, jumping from side to side, perhaps he is trying to protect himself.

Clary said that Alec doesn’t want Jace there, judging by how angry he was when his parabatai asked for Magnus’ help for that mission, maybe he can understand why he doesn’t want him in there.

Magnus clears his throat. “Alexander,” he calls him. His voice is soft, slow and sweet. And the black shadow seems to stop a few steps away from him. He can see his eyes shining in the black mist, only the irises, which are of that deep blue, intense and lively. He seems to observe Magnus.

“Alec...” Jace begins to say. “We are here to help you”.

And Magnus doesn’t have time to react, to make him stop.

It is at that moment that the shadow is attracted by that other voice, the eyes move and then he seems to move back into the darkness. Something, a source of light, conveys itself in what Magnus has identified as Alec’s hand and a flash goes through the fog. Magnus moves quickly, to summon his own magic in such a way as to curb that destructive flash and limit the damage.

   The shock wave, carried in that fog, is so strong that it pushes Magnus back. The recoil was so hard that his whole body was pushed back from the wall, and his vision blurred again, the pain radiating from his back to his chest. He almost feels the ghost of that wound that crossed his torso from side to side, it’s burning in an impossible way, it breaks his breath. 

It’s all dark again for a moment.

But as soon as he hears that wailing groan again, Magnus gets a hold on himself. The same must have happened to Alec, and also to Jace, but at the moment he is the least of his problems in all honesty. And Magnus does everything to recover and get back on his feet, now he can’t see anything even with his eyes open, in that thick and dark fog. There is that annoying ringing in his ears and everything hurts again. He could swear he had the terrible, ferrous taste of blood in his mouth.

Heck.

He has no time for this.

It’s already late.

He tightens his eyelids a couple of times, heaving a painful sigh between his clenched teeth. “Alexander” he calls him again, and his voice comes out choked in his throat. The pain mounts in his trachea, and Magnus tries to swallow it, with the slight ferrous taste of the blood that sticks on his palate and between his teeth. He spits at the end and decides that he has no time even for himself, he can’t let the pain cloud his sight.

He refocuses everything, finally, as he tries to stand up. The black shadow, Alexander, is on the ground and it seems all sprawled, the legs intertwined and an arm covering its head. Magnus shifts his gaze and spots Jace’s hair, which in that darkness is greyish. So, he moves his hand to open the door and push the blond Shadowhunter out of the cell, then closes it again.

When he finally stands up, he takes a step, echoing back into the room, and then another. And everything hurts, and this bothers him a little. He must think clearly, he must help Alexander, yet that fog of pain has entered his head.

He closes his eyelids again, and when he opens them again, there is the shadow that observes him with those intense blue irises, he feels his warm breath colliding on his face.

“It's me, Alexander,” Magnus tells him again. “Nothing happened,” he adds, reducing the distance between them. “I know, I know it's scary, and it hurts but... I’m here now, and now it's all over”.

Perhaps, perhaps the best choice would be to use magic to put him to sleep, to calm him down, but in the first place he doesn’t know how he will behave when he will wake up, if he wakes up, he swallows this thought. Also, he doesn’t know how he will react to his magic again. And now they are so close that they would risk killing each other. And it’s certainly the last thing he wants.

Magnus then extends a hand, to pick up his face and when he touches it, Alec seems frightened by that very light touch, by that caress, but then he gives in, and moves his head leaning a bit closer. Finally, he seems to focus on the warlock, and the darkness begins to recede and thicken only around him, behind his shoulders, in his hands, around his ankles.

The air is no longer unbearable, it’s no longer heavy. There is still the smell of sulphur, blood and ichor, but finally it’s no longer so dark. On the walls start to emerge the signs of a battle, claws and anger that intertwine on the bare stone.

Alec seems to be coming back to himself. Although he’s still impossible to focus precisely, surrounded as he is by that black fog, but Magnus can look into his eyes. The sclera in his eyes is black, as well as the vitreous humour, but in the centre the intense blue colour of his irises still flashes.

The iris is crushed, then, and becomes nothing more than a thin blue frame as the pupil expands, and welcomes Magnus’ image.

Between Alec's fingers, a strange concentration of energy thickens again, which seems to glow in that black and unkempt mass of hair. And Magnus would like to comment, he would like to tell him that he is so cool, now that he has magic at his service, that his magic arrives to radiate in his hair. But if his hair permeates magic, though, they are definitely in deep shit. And Magnus isn’t strong enough to stop him. Not now.

So, he decides to caress his face, the gentle fingers rubbing his cheeks and finally, finally, Alec reacts in the way he expected, and finally seems to focus on him. He seems disoriented, scared and confused, but also a little relieved, reassured. He blinks and his eyes are still black like that dark fog, as if all those demons he killed had become part of his own nature, but he seems to see Magnus anyway. Somehow, he seems to be coming back to himself. The darkness is leaving his skin, that dark fog vanishes leaving that lunar pallor on his skin, the scars of the runes on him, are perfectly in place. Even his face seems to get back to normal, a mask of blood and ichor, but at least that veil of black mist has disappeared.

Again, a flash goes through the darkness that still comes from him, his eyes seem to dart like that puff of energy that rises between his hair and between his fingers.

“It's all right,” Magnus tells him, reducing the space between them even more, resting his lips on his forehead, just above the bridge of his nose, to kiss away that twisted expression he has. “It's all right, it's over. It's over” he repeats.

“Mags” hears him say, and the voice is hoarse and distorted and sounds like a sob.

“Yes,” hhe replies and looks back into his eyes. “It’s me, my love, let me help you”.

And Alec seems so relieved, almost happy. “Have you come pick me up?” he asks him with this voice that trembles, that breaks. That darkness still flashes in his eyes.

“To pick you up?” Magnus repeats. “To go where?”.

And Alec makes this little sad grimace, and it almost seems like a half bitter smile. “Away. With you”.

“And where would you like to go? You mean… like eloping?” he asks him and tries to make him smile, but he can’t. And meanwhile he does everything not to look down, to keep his eyes on him, to mirror himself in Alec’s irises and give him time to come to his senses.

“Can’t I go away with you?” he asks very quietly and looks so sad.

And Magnus reaches out to cup his cheek, barely smiles at him. “I'm here, I'm not going anywhere,” he says.

And Alec frowns and is about to say more, but a small sob escapes his throat, which then becomes a groan. And his lips tremble and his eyes seem to be full of tears, and the sclera is black and perhaps Magnus can swear he feels the fog again begin to envelop them.

“Alexander...” he calls him again, very softly. “Everything is alright, hm? I’m here, I’m a little bruised, but I’m fine, I’m here with you, and I’m not going anywhere. Now let me help you, eh?”.

And Alec's lips are still twitching and then he sighs and moves slightly more towards Magnus. Reducing the already non-existent distance.

“It’s all right,” Magnus repeats. “It’s okay.” he nods and then decides it’s time to look down. 

Shredded clothes and that huge gash that starts at his right shoulder and reaches his left side. The smell of blood comes from him, from that and other wounds he has all over his body, on his forehead, on his hands and on his arms, perhaps even his legs and back are badly injured, and Magnus is not sure if he is only from that battle or that fighting that is infuriating inside himself. But he decides that it is not important, that if he has to save Alec he will use all the strength he has. All the energy left in his body. Because he must save hi,. “It's all right” he repeats and continues to hold his face in his hands, smiling a bit.

And Alec’s forehead, his eyebrows, his lips, everything on Alec’s face seems to contract in a grimace of pain before falling back forward. All the weight of his body on Magnus, who even if he is more than a bit battered, manages to support him. He does have to step back and bend a little to avoid tumbling over, but he is able to support him. And Magnus is still for a moment, only one, Alec’s full weight on him, which makes his legs wobble. But he feels him breathing, against him, he hears him moan very softly. He feels the heat that emanates from his body, the feverish warmth that comes from his neck, the sweat and blood that run down his face and fall onto Magnus’ shoulder. He tightens his grip more and moves a hand to open the cell with the blue fire of his magic. “A little help?” he asks quickly, as he squeezes Alec closer to him and tries to bring him into what was perhaps originally a bed, but now it’s only a frayed and battered mattress on which Alec has clearly rashed all his anger.

Jace is the first to return, and it shows that he struggles not to look at the ground or the walls. The marks of nailed, blood and ichor formed in little or large pools, the signs that left their shoes, around the floor, and the stains left by that black fog. Or maybe he does everything not to even look at Alec who physically collapsed in Magnus’ arms. And even when he reaches out to retrieve his brother, his parabatai, to carry him on that loose cot, his eyes seem to be clouded by an impossible pain.

But as soon as Jace puts him down, Alec has his eyes open again, for a moment he seems disoriented and another flash of magic vibrates between his fingers.

“Hey,” Magnus says picking up his hand, to get rid of the spark of magic, which burns his palm, like a sweltering ember. “Now, let me heal you, let me do it,” he adds, kissing the back of his hand.

And he keeps his eyes fixed on Alec’s for another moment, before looking down, on that enormous slash, which pumps blood and ichor and poison with his every breath.

And if he was even a little more lucid, Magnus would wonder how on earth he managed to stay alive until now. But certainly, he can’t fail to say he is happy to still have time. And he tries to ignore that little voice in his auricle, which then curls up in the brain and slips like a chill down his spine.

“It’s all right,” Magnus tells him, but perhaps these words are more for himself than for Alec.

Alec swallows, makes a tiny nod with his head, but continues to keep his eyes fixed on Magnus. “You're here,” he says and stretches his lips in a soft smile, a dull strangled groan escapes his teeth.

“I told you, I’m not going anywhere,” he replies. “Let me help you now, okay?”.

Alec seems confused again, when he opens his eyes and seems to finally realize that he doesn’t feel well. “It hurts” he murmurs.

“I know. I know, Alexander. Believe me,” he says again, kissing his fingers now, which are tightly clenched on Magnus’ hand. “But now I'm here, and everything will be fine. I promise”.

Alec looks at him for a moment and then seems satisfied with what Magnus told him. He smiles slightly, this very weak but happy smile. “You're alive, you're alive”.

“Yes, you are too,” Magnus says, very softly, smiling. “Don’t worry now, okay? Me and Jace are here to help you”.

Alec frowns. And a bolt of energy goes up on top of his head.

“I know you’re a bit upset with Jace, but if the runes can help us heal you faster, we have to try, okay?” He adds, running his fingers through his hair, staring at that flash of magical energy that seems to flicker back there. “Everything is alright”.

“You? Are you okay?” he asks very softly, his eyes seem clouded by pain, fatigue.

“Yes, of course I’m fine, can’t you see me? I’m fine, just let me help you...” he adds, stopping his hand at the edge of his forehead, between two wounds that will probably leave their mark. It’s hot.

“You were dead.” he murmurs, with this heavy broken voice. “I saw you die... I couldn’t do anything for─I… I thought you─” he bites his lips, full and velvety, and tries to hold back a sob.

Magnus decides to hold that hand on his forehead to lighten his pain, and the other will be enough to heal him. “You won’t get rid of me that easily, my darling” he replies, smiling very soft. “Let me heal you at least a little bit, you have a high fever and... you’re just not in your best shape, eh? We will talk, and make out as soon as we both feel better”.

Alec half-closes his eyes. “You’ll stay here, right? You won’t leave, will you?”.

“Never, I’ll never go away,” Magnus tells him and casts an eloquent glance at Jace, who takes his stele and moves to draw a single rune, iratze, a couple of inches above that big gash.

Iratze will relieve Alec’s pain, while Magnus draws the blue fire of his magic between his fingers. Healing magic isn’t easy, and it isn’t his specialty but, for now, Magnus’ abilities must be enough, at least to remove all the ichor and the demon poison that has certainly now mixed with his blood.

Alec moans, again, but he doesn’t say anything, he keeps his eyes half-open fixed on Magnus. That black mist that only a few minutes ago darkened his eyes now a distant memory.

There is friction, that thing, that internecine war, that is inside Alec is rejecting Magnus’ magic, even if he lets it flow gently, so very cautiously on him. “Allow me to help you, Alexander, please” he sighs, bending down again to kiss his forehead. “Allow me, Alexander, I’ll make you feel better. I promise”.

It’s only when Alec sighs louder, his chest wiggling, that Magnus can finally act and suck away the ichor, the poison from that enormous wound and all the others. 

It’s certainly not a conscious process, the one with which Alec was rejecting him and his blue healing fire, probably he didn’t even realize that something was pushing away Magnus’ magic, but if he managed to control this innate response, there are good hopes.

Perhaps, perhaps he knows Magnus’ magic well enough to be able to dose even what now burns in his veins. Maybe Magnus can afford to hope a little more.

Alec tightens his jaw and moves his head, wrinkles his nose and uncovers his teeth in a pained grimace.

Magnus then moves a hand to try to ease that pain, passing his fingers through Alec’s hair again, while with the other continues to wipe away the poison from his body.

From time to time he feels a bit of friction with that thing that Alec has in his body, and it is perhaps that kind of magic, of new essence that leaks into every cell, rather than the poison of a demon that makes it more painful. But iratze seems to help the healing process, it seems to alleviate his pain at the second activation and so Magnus orders Jace to activate the other one, sangliers , to replace the lost blood alongside the one now rotted by the poison. 

This won’t be enough, because now Alec’s body is affected by that internecine war not only by the wounds and the poison and the blood loss, and Magnus will only be able to ease his pain, with as much energy he has stored.

The rest of the healing process, soon enough, will be up to Alec alone.

Please, Magnus asks the Angel or whatever energy lies above their heads, or under their feets, please let him live. Don't take him.

And then moves his eyes and looks at Alec’s pained grimace, his forehead furrowed, sweat and blood covered. And decides he has to ask Alec, and not some Gods, Angels or Saints, nor Demons. No one in heaven or hell cares for this, for his life. Don’t leave me, he asks silently. Don’t.

[ch4]

[professional-anti]

Chapter Eleven: Magnus Bane

Okay, kiddos. Let’s go.

Jace and Clary leave the Brotherhood HQ, and Jace calls the cab driver a “brain-dead moron”. You know what, here’s the full quote:

Jace leaned forward and banged his hand against the partition separating them from the cab driver. “Turn left! Left! I said to take Broadway, you brain-dead moron!”

Oh, man, I’m so hot for Jace you guys. He’s so evil and cruel. I’m fanning myself. And the reason he wants to take Broadway? He wants breakfast. That’s it. It’s not a life-or-death situation. He wants fucking breakfast.

I like the idea of the diner they go to. A place where magical ppl can get together for some spaghetti. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this, but I LOVE the idea of a secret (or not-so-secret) magical Manhattan. It’s just so unfortunate that Clare’s is so bad.

Clarinet asks Jack-Jack about Magnus Bane. Jack-Jack explains that he’s a warlock. Alec shows up. Clare is the foreshadowing master.

Clary freaks out about a guy in front of the store who looks like a demon. Clary. Girl. Come on. You know about this stuff already. It’s been like two days. Calm down. Apparently he’s a bouncer (for a diner) and is the warlock equivalent of a squib.

Honesty, I love this diner. They have blood on tap!!!! That’s so cool!!!!!! Plus, the people eating there sound way more interesting than our MCs.

[A] boy with spiky blue dreads was sitting next to a beautiful Indian girl with long black hair and gauzelike golden wings sprouting from her back.

Gotta love how the only people of color are basically set-dressing, though. At least Simon is Jewish, even with the messed up antisemitic crosses-burned-into-him dream thing. Clare’s Jewish, though, so of course she represents only herself and leaves everyone else out in the cold.

Alec shows up:

There was a kinetic, almost feverish energy to [Alec] that hadn’t been there before. Something about Jace sharpened him, brought him into focus. If she were going to draw them together, she thought, she would make Jace a little blurry, while Alec stood out, all sharp, clear planes and angles.

Oh, here it is. The “poor gay boy only comes to life in front of hopelessly straight crush” trope. Bc Alec has nothing better to do than obsess over Jace, a boy who is currently being rude to the waitress. Does Clare honestly not know how annoying rude boys are?

Isabelle and Simon show up. Apparently, even Isabelle’s perfume is evil:

Isabelle’s hair tickled [Clary’s] face, smelling of some kind of vanilla perfume. Clary fought the urge to sneeze. She hated vanilla perfume. She’d never understood why some girls felt the need to smell like dessert.

Haven’t I mentioned? Clary is the best girl to ever girl. Isabelle can’t even order right. Instead of getting something reasonable, like a large order of coconut pancakes (gross, Clary), “Isabelle fastidiously order[s] a fruit smoothie”.

Jace goes off to flirt with the waitress. Clary is confused bc the waitress is a Downworlder and aren’t they, like, totally evil? Isabelle and Alec assure her that the only kill the bad Downworlders. The rest they let live.

“Like letting spiders live because they eat mosquitoes, Clary thought.” Uh, not really. The Downworlders aren’t spiders. They’re just people, living their lives.

“So they’re good enough to let live, good enough to let live, good enough to make your food for you, good enough to flirt with—but not really good enough? I mean, not as good as people.” Isabelle and Alec looked at her as if she were speaking Urdu. “Different from people,” said Alec finally.

This doesn’t really seem like such a difficult question? Isabelle and Alec are just trying to cover up their bullshit.

“Better than mundanes?” said Simon. “No,” Isabelle said decidedly. “You could turn a mundane into a Shadowhunter. But you could never turn a Downworlder into one of the Clave. They can’t withstand the runes.”

So Shadowhunters judge others based on their ability to become Shadowhunters? Seems not at all racist. I’m so glad we had this chat. Jace comes back and explains that there’s just a shit-ton of hostility between Shadowhunters and Downworlders, so it’s not really racism.

Miracle of miracles, Isabelle reveals that Magnus Bane has invited the magical community of New York to his house for a party. God, I love parties.

There’s a whole day before the party, so Simon and Isabelle decide to go for a walk in Central Park. For some reason, this makes Clary feel a “murderous rage”. These emotions are seriously not healthy.

Back at the Institute, Clary goes exploring in the library and finds a photo of her mom and other Order of the Pheonix members-cum-Deatheaters Shadowhunters. Evil Giles shows up and points out Valentine, Luke, the Lightwoods, Jace’s mom, and himself in the picture. Clary mentions that Jace doesn’t look anything like his father. What could this possibly mean?

Honestly, the concept of a book about the children of villains isn’t terrible. It really just the complete ripping-off of Harry Potter that annoys me.

Oh, God. Clary gets back to her room (armed with a sleeping potion from Hodge) to see Jace looking at her sketchbook. I’m not even good at drawing, and my sketchbooks are still deeply personal. You can’t just look in someone’s sketchbook! It’s like a diary! WTF, Jace!

In fact, Clary tells Jace that it’s  basically a diary and that he shouldn’t look at it. This should be obvious.

Wait, I’m laughing:

“You could try not being charming all the time,” Clary said. “It might be a relief for everyone.”

BITCH, WHERE???

Jace offers to tell Clary a bedtime story. It’s the famous falcon story, the one that Clare used in her Harry Potter fanfiction. You know, where Jace’s father gives him a falcon to train, and when Jace loves it, his father kills it. Proof that Jace is Draco.

Somehow, Clary makes the connection that this story is about Jace only as she falls asleep. Whatever.

Isabelle wakes up Clary. Again, a famous moment:

[Isabelle] looked like a moon goddess. Clary hated her.

Bitch, Isabelle is a moon goddess, and I love her.

Yes, we have a makeover scene!! My secret weakness. I’m sorry, fellow patriarchy fighters. Makeover scenes are just so good.

Isabelle continues to be the coolest person in this book:

Her room looked as if a disco ball had exploded inside it. The walls were black and shimmered with swirls of sponged-on golden paint. Clothes were strewn everywhere: on chairs, spilling out of the closet and the tall wardrobe propped against one wall. Her vanity table, its mirror rimmed with spangled pink fur, was covered in glitter, sequins, and pots of blush and powder.

I want this room!

Clary gets a slinky black dress, fishnets, and boots. I want this outfit, too. When Isabelle does Clary’s makeup, Clary asks if Alec is gay. For some reason, this causes an intense shock in Isabelle:

Isabelle’s wrist jerked. The eyeliner skidded, inking a long line of black from the corner of Clary’s eye to her hairline. “Oh, hell,” Isabelle said, putting the pen down. “It’s all right,” Clary began, putting her hand up to her eye. “No, it isn’t.” Isabelle sounded near tears as she scrabbled around among the piles of junk on top of the vanity . . . She sat down on the edge of the bed, ankle bracelets jingling, and looked at Clary through her hair. “How did you guess?” she said finally. “I—” “You absolutely can’t tell anyone,” said Isabelle. “Not even  Jace?” “Especially not Jace!” “All right.” Clary heard the stiffness in her own voice. “I guess I didn’t realize it was such a  big deal.” “It would be to my parents,” said Isabelle quietly. “They would disown him and throw him out of the Clave—” “What, you can’t be gay and a Shadowhunter?” “There’s no official rule about it, But people don’t like it. I mean, less with people our age—I think,” she added, uncertainly, and Clary remembered how few other people her age Isabelle had ever really met. “But the older generation, no. If it happens, you don’t talk about it.”

Okay. So. I’m trying to judge this for when it was written. But, like. Is the homophobia necessary? It’s kind of like the ridiculous sexism in ACOTA/R. It’s a choice the author is making, for, like, no good reason. This is a case of a straight author needlessly torturing her gay character. But since this was published in 2007, I feel like this has been talked out, so let’s move on.

IT TURNS OUT THAT ISABELLE’S ANKLETS ARE WEAPONS. I LOVE HER. WE ARE GETTING MARRIED. WEDDING INVITATIONS TO FOLLOW.

Ugh, Simon short-circuits bc Clary is wearing a short skirt. Please calm down, sweetie. You’re embarrassing me. Wait, what is even going on here? Jace gives Clary a dagger, and, uh, this happens:

“I could give you a thigh sheath to put that in,” Isabelle offered. “I’ve got tons.” “ABSOLUTELY NOT,” said Simon.

I’m actually laughing. Lol for real. What does this even mean? Is a thigh sheath too sexy or something? Simon, can you chill for .2 seconds? This isn’t your body. Let’s all take deep breaths.

Clary puts the dagger in the outside pocket of her backpack because there’s no way having to unzip a backpack to get to the dagger could bit her in the ass during a fight. Then Jace reaches over and undoes her hair bc, uh, shipping moment.

I’m so grossed out by the fact that in a short while, they will think they’re siblings.

[punishandenslavesuckers]

Let's do something crazy: Valentino/Magnus

THERE WAS A TIME THAT VALENTINE MORGENSTERN STOOD FOR ALL THAT WAS GOOD AND NOBLE IN THE CLAVE. THERE WAS A TIME:

Valentine Morgenstern knows how frustrating this must be from the perspective of someone like Magnus Bane. Bane, for all his age and power, has always been a bit of a rogue element. The price of independence. His own fault really. His credibility isn’t what it could be; his alliances with the Clave strong but not strong enough. Bane’s greatest weapon outside of his considerable magic is that people like him better than they like other people. He’s popular. A Rockstar. He’s used to getting his way. Finding his words failing now on unsympathetic ears, unmoved by any appeal to familiarity or trust?

It’s almost funny.

“Are you not hearing what I’m saying? None of that is true!” He’s so angry now he’s at that strange desperate stage between completely losing it and crying. Warlocks. The older they get, the deeper, bigger, more unwieldy their emotions. Magnus is losing control of his to the utterly calm face of Maryse Lightwood. “People are dead! Someone is doing this on purpose and you need to do something about it. I’m telling you right now.”

“We are looking into, Mr. Bane. As I’ve been saying for the last five minutes. Do not make me remove you from this premise. I’m sorry for your loss, but the facts of each case stand as they are until such a time as new evidence is presented.” Hell, Maryse is good. She stares down a five-hundred (six-hundred?) year old immortal who is so angry he’s starting to lose control of his glamore and she never even blinks. “We appreciate the services you’ve rendered to the Clave and your diligence as a citizen in bringing us your concerns, but these matters are being handled.”

Which is when Bane telekinetically snaps her clipboard into fifteen pieces, the entire things shattering like glass in her fingers.

“You’re not handling shit,” Bane snarls.

Valentine thinks he’s probably going to have to intervene.

Maryse, again, doesn’t flinch though every single nephilim in the room grabs for their stele. She calmly holds up one hand to stave them off, never looking away from the warlock in front of her. Magnus doesn’t back down. He really should. He’s just used magic against a shadowhunter, however cosmetically, and Valentine knows that Mayse has made actionable mountains out of less. Buried people for less.

But Bane’s got this look, feral, but calculated.

No. Not here. Bane’s got no hold at the Clave, but he’s popular enough it will cause trouble. Can’t do it like that.

“I will give you a warning,” Maryse says reasonably. “Next time you bring magic to bear against me, I will have to detain you. I remember the courses you taught at the Indonesian Institute. I would rather not arrest a former teacher–”

Magnus laughs and the whole room shivers, aches with the potential energy of his fury, a physical presence in the room. 

“God, you grew up, huh? They could put my eyes out in front of you  and you wouldn’t flinch.”

Maryse narrows her eyes.

“The Law,” she says, “is hard, but it is the Law.”

“Fuck you,” Magnus says. “You’re a murderer and all the Writ in the world won’t undo it.”

Valentine separates himself from the doorway he’s been watching from and crosses the room. Magnus sees him coming and his expression immediately changed to relief. And why shouldn’t it? Luke and Jocelyn were favored students of his; they have him on speed dial. Too bad they’re in mission in London and won’t be back for a month.

“Valentine,” he says, pushing past Maryse. “I need to talk to you. No one else will listen.”

“Of course,” he says, clapping Magnus on the shoulder. “Apologies for the welcome. Let’s take this to a conference room.”

Magnus follows him. He’s agitated. A scent of static around him like its own pressure system. Valentine thinks, idly, how easy it would be to turn around and shove a seraph blade through the warlock’s stomach, wrench it up, watch every inch of magic fall to utterly useless in the face of direct action. Magnus is glancing warily at all the other shadowhunters milling through the halls of the Institute and on closer inspection it’s clear to Valentine the warlock’s not sleeping. That’s he’s ragged. Makes sense. A lot of his friends are being detained and disappearing.

Valentine shuts them in a conference room and Magnus immediately launches into a rant.

“Someone is framing downworlders. I can prove it. I have a dozen witness accounts, a forensic spell that’s admissible in court, and I’ll testify myself. Viggo and Verity were killed before those weapons were put on their bodies. This is a cover up. You have something wrong in your ranks, Valentine, and no one will listen to a downworlder, you have to—”

“Magnus. Calm down,” Valentine says. He crosses the room, placing a hand on the warlock’s shoulder. “I know. I know something is wrong. And I’d appreciate it if you weren’t. blowing things up in my foyer while I try to hunt it down.” He squeezes his shoulder. “It’s okay.”

Magnus stares. “You know?”

“Yes. I’m putting a stop to it.”

Magnus keeps staring at him, then the relief seems to catch up to him all at once and the warlock kind of falls back into one of the chairs at the nearby table, dropping his face into his hands and exhaling like he’s been holding that breath for a week. Valentine studies him. Bane isn’t that big really. A perfectly normal-looking man. Beneath the mohawk, the nail polish, the boots, the make-up, and the rage he’s actually just… this. A very stressed out and emotional creature staving off a panic attack in a conference room.  

“Thank god,” he says. “I thought I was going to come in here and you’d tell me I was crazy.”

“You’re not crazy,” Valentine says, moving to lean on the table beside Magnus. “I swore an oath to protect the people of this city. That includes your people.”

“Viggo and Verity were my friends, Val.”

“I know.” Valentine places his hand again on the warlock’s shoulder. “It’s okay. I’ve find who did this, I swear. It won’t be much longer now.”

Magnus reaches up, places his hand over Valentine’s. “Thank you. That… it means a lot.”

“No thanks needed, Magnus.”

The warlock looks up at him. Hmm. Valentine is old enough now to admit there are a few things he enjoys and one of them is having beautiful people looking up at him. Magnus Bane is one of the most powerful people in this hemisphere and he is, objectively, beautiful and right now he looks… ragged, exhausted, like he’s been in a fight recently, his make-up smeared from sleeping in it or going all night not sleeping and wearing it. His dark hari is touch-wrecked, the style ruined, his clothes rumpled. One could almost imagine this is what he looks like after someone fucks him.

Valentine wonders, idly, if Magnus’ cat eyes come out during that kind of thing or if he hides it.

“It is needed,” Magnus says. “The Clave needs more people like you. Looking for this. You understand. No one is infallible. Even nephilim are human and humans care capable of terrible things.”

“I know.”

“You have no idea how relieved I am. Is there anything I can do to help?”

“No, Magnus. You’ve done enough.”

Magnus stands up and before Valentine can do anything about it, the warlock pulls him into a tight embrace.

“Really, Val.” He seems overwhelmed, his voice raw. “Thank you. I know I can trust you to make this right.”

The warlock is surprisingly sturdy in Valentine’s arms. He’s so… grateful. He’s leaning against him, his head tucked against his shoulder and its very odd how human Magnus can seem. How pliable. Valentine wonders what he could do with gratefulness this complete as he stands there, comforting one of the most dangerous men in New York, imagining the look on the half-breed’s face the day he realizes the mistake he’s made. He thinks it would be so… correct  if Magnus would just fall to his knees right now.

Not for that (well, maybe for that) but just because that seems natural.

Magnus Bane built so many things for the Clave – the Portal systems, the ward walls, the rune apps, so many things. He’s so useful. He’s also still hugging Valentine long past it being strictly appropriate and Valentine should really let the warlock go. But there is something… about this. Knowing. Holding complete power over someone who has no idea, particularly someone as individually powerful as Magnus Bane – the vicious one, the summoner, binder, ward-worker.

Valentine suspects he could, if he wanted to, pull the warlock around and pin him to the table and he wouldn’t do anything to stop him. He won’t do anything to stop Valentine until it’s too late, the trap closing around an animal. There is a standing order, actually, not to kill Magnus if possible but to subdue him because of all the warlocks in New York… he’d have a place in the new world.

On his knees, of course, but a place.

“It’s going to be okay,” Valentine says, the way Luke or Jocelyn might. “Don’t worry, Magnus. You can rely on me.”

“I know.” He hugs the shadowhunter more tightly. “I know you won’t let me down.”

Valentine smiles.

[humansunshineao3]

Fighting the Good Fight [Ch. 3]

Alec Lightwood just wants to run his Institute in peace.

This is the story that could’ve unfolded if Jace didn’t exist.

Rating: General Audiences (may change later)

Pairings: Magnus/Alec, Clary/Izzy

Tags: Jace doesn’t exist, transgender alec lightwood, retelling of the TV show.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: I might update the summary because it’s TRASH lmao

#recastjace #firedom

Oh also, Alec is transgender in this fic, but he’s already out, so if you’re looking for angsty coming out fic, you’re looking in the wrong place!

Previous Chapter

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Episode 3: Dead Man’s Party

They had to leave the bloody van there, all three of them miserable and silent on the long walk back to the institute. Alec spent the time trying to piece together what exactly Valentine could have to gain by placing his incompetent daughter in Shadowhunter ranks and bringing in a clueless mundane, and tentatively concluded that Valentine was smarter than that.

Clary wasn’t a threat to them. She wore her emotions on her sleeve, and she was quite obviously close to breaking point just from losing her mundane best friend.

“There’s one thing I don’t understand,” Clary seethed as they walked into the institute, arms folded tightly.

Izzy swallowed hard, glancing at Alec before answering. “What’s that?”

“How you can be better than what you call mundanes.”

“We can take runes to enhance our…”

“Well your runes sure came in handy when protecting Simon!” Clary shrieked, whirling around to glare at him. “Isn’t that your job, Alec? Protecting mundanes?!”

Alec put his hands on his hips. “I screwed up,” he confessed. “I took my eyes off him for a second, to see if you and Izzy were alright, and he was gone.”

“It wasn’t Alec’s fault,” Izzy said quietly, “the vampires would have just hurt Alec to get to him. Camille is a real snake. When she decides she wants something, she’ll kill anyone who stands in her way.”

“Who the hell is Camille?!” Clary demanded, and Alec raised an eyebrow at his sister, the same question in his expression.

Izzy bit her lip. “She’s in charge of the vampires of New York. I’ve… Met her a few times. Meliorn is close with her.”

“Close,” Alec echoed, puffing out his cheeks. “Are you crazy? You realise that one little bite from her and you could be…”

“I don’t care about Camille!” Clary snapped, striding across to the map of New York. “We need to get Simon back. Where do the vampires live?”

Alec snorted, shaking his head. “Listen, we can’t just go marching into the Hotel Du Mort like a bunch of hot-heads, we could break the Accords.”

“I don’t give a flying fuck about the accords!”

“Clary, the Accords are the only thing preventing a war with the downworlders,” Izzy told her, reaching out to touch her shoulder soothingly.

“Look, I told Simon not to go to the van, he should have had at least a modicum of common sense…” Alec pointed out.

Izzy glared at him. “Alec, not now.”

“I am going to the Hotel Du… Whatever. You can stay here with your common sense. I’m going to save my friend.”

Alec grasped Clary’s arm as she tried to walk past him. “Do you have a death wish? You’re going to walk into a nest of vampires with no weapons and no plan? Really?”

“Do you have a better idea?” She asked coldly. Alec pursed his lips, and looked from Izzy, to Clary, and back again.

“Actually, yes. We can’t allow Camille to keep Simon, he already knows too much about the downworld and I cannot afford to have a mundane death on my record. So yes, we are going to get your little mundie pal back.” Alec tilted his head to the side, willing away the tension in his neck, “but we’re doing it my way. Quietly, with no collateral damage.”

Clary deflated a little. “Simon charmed you a little bit, didn’t he?”

Alec snorted, but didn’t bother to deny it. Simon was… Kind. Stupid, but kind. Besides, he really couldn’t afford a mundane fatality on an already unsanctioned mission.

“He is soft inside, secretly,” Izzy smiled, a little more relaxed now that Clary and Alec were on the same page. “So, big brother, what do you have in mind?”

“How pussy-whipped is Meliorn, on a scale of one to ten?” Alec asked innocently, though his eyes glinted with mischief. Izzy grinned wickedly back at him.

“Twelve.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Clary decided to stay with Alec while Izzy went to see Meliorn. She hadn’t had time to figure out what exactly bothered her about the thought of the raven-haired shadowhunter pressing up against some fairy guy (Alec had used the word Seelie but Clary preferred to think of him as a boyish Tinkerbell). She just knew that she’d definitely prefer spending time with Alec, which was a feat in itself. The elder shadowhunter hadn’t exactly been pleasant to her thus far, but he was cute and Clary could smell the touch-starved on him a mile away.

He’d been buzzing anxiously around the institute, trying, in his own words, not to act suspiciously and failing spectacularly. He was checking weapons, glancing at the clock every few seconds, and Clary tentatively put a hand on his back. The stiff armour of his binder made his shirt shift strangely under her hand.

“Alec, is it smart to wear that into battle?” Clary asked quietly, once she’d checked that no-one could overhear them.

The swords were all blunt, and Alec made a mental note to give the first year interns a bollocking when he got back. It was their job to make sure all the weapons were prepped. He almost didn’t hear Clary speaking to him, only snapping out of his inner monologue about Clave policy surrounding weapon upkeep when she stepped a little closer, invading his personal space.

“What?” He demanded, putting his hand on her shoulder and gently pushing her back a step.

Clary gave him a disapproving look. “You shouldn’t be wearing your binder to exercise; even I know that much.”

“Are you, a random cis girl, really telling me, a trans dude who’s been wearing binders since he was seventeen, what is and isn’t safe use of a binder?” He hissed, folding his arms across his chest.

Of course, she was right, but that wasn’t the point.

“I’m just looking out for you, Alec.” Clary sighed, putting her hands on her hips. “I’m not like you, I can’t pretend not to give a shit about other people.”

Alec grumbled a little, something about not pretending, or not wanting attention, or something. He wasn’t sure what he was trying to get at, honestly, he was just surprised by the tenacity of the two mundanes who’d come barrelling into his life. It was rare that someone called him out on his bullshit; only Izzy usually cared enough to see through it in the first place. So rather than apologise and risk further exposure at the hands of the redheaded mundane-shadowhunter, he spluttered and scoffed until she smiled at him.

“Promise you’ll change into something more comfortable before we go and meet up with Izzy? We’re going to need you in the Hotel. Can’t have you passing out halfway through staking a vampire, can we?” She coaxed.

“I was going to, anyway,” he muttered, though they both knew it was a lie.

He stalked off to his room to change, shoulders somewhere near his ears. He wasn’t like his sister; he didn’t enjoy attention. Izzy wore beautiful clothes, walked down the institute like she wanted everyone to look at her. He couldn’t have been more different from his parabatai, preferring to stay in the shadows, engage on the periphery. It was a lot easier to make out who was trustworthy from a distance.

A traitorous part of him was beginning to think that Clary was trustworthy. She was an idiot, hot-headed, stubborn, and clueless, but…

She worried about him, even though he’d been a grade A asshole to her ever since she’d arrived.

It was kinda nice.

“You going out on a mission?” Alec stopped short when he heard Hodge’s voice behind him, and turned around, tangling his hands together behind his back.

“Uhhh… Yes. Nothing too bad, just a…”

“You’re terrible at lying to me, Alec,” Hodge snorted, holding up a hand. “Don’t bother. I don’t wanna know.”

Alec huffed out a laugh, and bit the inside of his cheek. “Thanks, Hodge.” He took a step back, but the older man reached out to grab his arm.

“Wait. Just… Be careful, alright? Going against the Clave can be dangerous. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“Who said I’m going against the Clave?” Alec felt his face flush, the hair on the back of his arms standing on end.

Hodge sighed, and gave him a searching look. “When I joined… You know. I wanted to do the right thing; I wanted to help people because the Clave was letting downworlders get away with terrible things. I had good intentions. I see those same intentions in you. The Clave is not the place for people with heart, Alec.”

��Everyone knows I don’t have a heart,” Alec snorted, squirming out of Hodge’s reach.

“Bullshit,” Hodge said quietly. “Just… Be careful, okay? Don’t trust Clary. Don’t trust anyone but your parabatai.”

Alec lifted his chin, looking anywhere but at Hodge’s penetrating gaze. “I don’t,” he announced, before turning on his heel and hurriedly retreating to his room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Did you get the info?” Alec asked, fingers toying with the bottom of his quiver as he fell into step besides Izzy. She purred, and fixed her lipstick in her phone screen. “Alright, alright, I get it, Meliorn is good in bed, I should get a Seelie fuck-buddy, everyone is very jealous of you, what did you find out?”

“I hope you’ve got something, because this place looks pretty formidable…” Clary looked uncharacteristically pensive as she looked up at the concrete block that was the Hotel Du Mort.

“Downworlders are slaves to their impulses, I bet he sung like a canary.” Alec snorted.

Izzy elbowed him in the ribs. “You can’t just assume all downworlders are the same, big brother. You’ve met precisely three.”

“And those three were all slaves to their impulses. Come on, Meliorn would do literally anything for a glimpse of your nipple.”

“Okay, I get it. Alec’s bitter because no downworlder ever paid attention to him,” Clary rolled her eyes. “How do we get in?”

Alec’s mouth fell open in an ‘o’ shape, and Izzy snickered, putting her arms around Clary’s shoulders and squeezing her tightly. “Is it too soon to say I love you, Clary Fray?”

“I’ll feel better about flirting when I get Simon back,” Clary said pointedly, though she leaned in a little to Izzy’s embrace. “So what have you got?”

“Right, so… Meliorn’s going to meet us there. He just had to make an excuse to leave the Seelie Realm and then he’ll be at the Hotel.”

“Meliorn is going to help us?” Alec asked skeptically.

Izzy’s smile was as bright as an August day. “I did a favour for him, he’s doing a favour for me.”

Clary and Alec looked at each other.

“He’s going to distract the guards while we sneak in the back entrance. It’ll be easy to sneak through the corridors with a couple of runes.” Izzy shrugged. “He said that Camille has a bunch of fledgling grunts in there; all the magic and rune resistant vampires have their own covens.”

Alec hummed, patting her on the shoulder. “Good job, Iz. That’s perfect.”

“So you need to draw more of those tattoos on me?” Clary asked, toying with the stele that Izzy had given her the day before.

“Runes, sweetie,” Izzy smiled, “they’re called runes.”

“And if you ask me they’re completely overrated,” Meliorn sighed, stepping out of the shadows in front of them. Izzy flashed him a grin, and Clary licked her lips. So he wasn’t a boyish tinkerbell.

“Just to be transparent, here,” Alec said, stepping in front of Izzy before she could throw herself at the Seelie. “What exactly did Izzy promise you in return for this favour?”

Meliorn inclined his head to the side innocently. “Are you sure you want to know, darling?”

“I meant aside from whatever quirky se act you wanted,” Alec sighed, giving his sister a long-suffering look. Meliorn laughed.

“If you’re asking whether she promised the mortal cup to us, she did not. Seelies have no use for the Mortal Cup; there are no demons in our realm. And as far as we’re concerned, the world has enough shadowhunters.”

Alec raised an eyebrow.

“He’s happy to help, Alec. No-one wants the vampires gaining power less than the Seelie Queen does.” Izzy pointed out, eyeing the way Clary was looking at her watch. “Come on, we have a mundane to rescue.”

Meliorn wandered over to the front entrance of the Du Mort in the nonchalant way that he did everything except love-making, while the three shadowhunters stood in the shadows applying a plethora of runes to Clary’s arms and stomach. Alec was impressed at how little the redhead flinched, and soon enough they were ready, leaping up the building with their freshly applied runes.

When they reached the top, the sun broke over the horizon, and Alec smiled. Perfectly timed. It didn’t take much to break open the doors and sneak down into the hotel, the eldest shadowhunter shooting two approaching vampires in the leg with silver-tipped arrows and incapacitating them effortlessly. Izzy patted him on the shoulder, and took the lead.

“Let’s hope that Meliorn’s distracting enough to keep Camille busy,” Clary muttered, brandishing an angel blade ineptly. Alec quickly corrected her grip, gave her an encouraging smile, and followed Izzy.

“Simon will probably be in the middle of the hotel, in the most secure room. Camille’s chambers. I’ve been there once, I think it’s on the fourth floor.” Izzy breathed, her back pressed against a corner.

Alec could feel a stress headache coming on just at the thought of that, and elected to ignore the thought of Izzy and Meliorn giving Camille a late night visit. “Alright, lead the way, Iz.”

As they rounded the corner, Alec caught sight of Simon, priming an arrow in a second as he realised that the vampire who’d taken him had him by the throat. A beautiful old dagger was pressed to the thin skin of Simon’s throat, and Alec pursed his lips, narrowing his eyes.

“Alec, don’t.” Clary growled, grabbing his arm. “You could hit Simon.”

At any other time, Alec would have insisted that actually, he knew what he was doing with a bow, but the vampire didn’t seem to want to wait, twitching nervously where he stood behind Simon.

“Stop right there or the mundane dies!” He commanded, and Clary took a step back, pulling Izzy and Alec with her. “Back up! Come on, move!”

The vampire herded them back towards the roof, hissing threateningly everytime Alec’s hand made a move towards his quiver, the dagger digging a little harder into the mundane’s throat. Eventually, they ended up back where they’d started, at the top of the hotel. “We’re not leaving without Simon!” Clary insisted.

“Go, now! Clary, don’t!” Simon begged, tears shining in his eyes.

“I am not leaving you!” Clary shot back, but then Simon was staggering towards them, and the vampire dived behind the corner.

“Take him! Get out!” The vampire hissed. “Don’t come back!”

Simon whirled around, meeting the vampire’s eyes even as he was dragged backwards by Alec. “I don’t know how to thank you.”

“You mean nothing,” the vampire spat, “this is about Valentine and the chaos he can bring. Isabelle Lightwood,” he looked away from Simon, to Izzy, who was herding Clary out the door, “remember who your friends are.”

Izzy couldn’t help the shiver that went down her spine, and hurried after her brother and the others.

“Oh my God, Simon, you’re free! We did it!” Clary squeaked, throwing her arms around his neck.

Alec sighed, and ran his hands through his hair, resisting the urge to fist pump. The mundane was retrieved, with no collateral damage. No vampires killed, no Mortal Cup lost, everyone was happy.

The Clave never had to know.

He wasn’t really paying attention to Clary fussing over Simon, their exclamations and platonic declarations of love background noise as he revelled in the victory they’d just claimed.

“At least now I know Clary isn’t in love with Simon,” Izzy whispered to him, sidling up to him. “She just friend-zoned the shit out of him.”

“Bummer,” Alec snorted, “he’s a good guy. For a mundie.”

“Awwww, do you have a crush?” Izzy cooed, poking him in the ribs. Alec hissed, and slapped her hand away.

“Stop that. No. He’s not my type.”

Izzy pouted at him, wrapping her arms around his waist. “Then who is your type, big brother?”

Alec turned his face up at the sun, closing his eyes. The warmth felt better than he’d expected after the cold darkness of the Hotel Du Mort.

“I’ll know him when I see him.”

Next Chapter

[mcrdices]

hi everyone ! i’m sam, she/her, est, twenty years old and i’m super hyped to be here so without further ado, have a look under the cut to find some info on this here werewolf and please lmk if you would like to plot !

➰ ( BOB MORLEY, CISMALE, HE/HIM ) *✧.:°░｡ —- is that BENJAMIN CALANOC ?! you know them, right? they are the TWENTY-EIGHT year old WEREWOLF !! they’re known for being DAUNTLESS & LOYAL - but i’d be careful if i were you because they’re also TRUCULENT & IMPULSIVE. i heard they volunteered to be paired with ELIZA TAYLOR.

so, first thing’s first: literally everyone calls him ben rather than benjamin or any other nickname. in fact, he actually hates being called by his full name so that’s a good way to get yourself punched if that’s what you’re looking for

he’s literally always ready to throw hands tbh oops

never had much of a family and definitely didn’t have a stable childhood. he never knew his biological parents and was bounced around the foster system for literally his entire childhood. he lived in various places around the united states, usually not for very long. he stayed in new york city for a while in his late teens, but the moment he turned eighteen and aged out of the system he was gone. 

he’s been a werewolf since he was a very young kid. he has no idea exactly what happened or who bit him and he’s pretty much had to figure everything out by himself due to the fact that he was never really part of a pack thanks to constantly being moved from family to family/place to place. 

as i mentioned before, he left nyc when he turned eighteen and probably wandered around for a while before finally settling here in los angeles. he’s definitely joined the pack here and taken an interest in the group.

he agreed to be bonded with a shadowhunter because...well, lmao, he’s kind of a troublemaker and has probably pissed off enough shadowhunters in various places that he figured doing this one good thing might get them off his case for a while (he’s not particularly fond of shadowhunters and feels they generally misuse power that they don’t deserve in the first place, but then that’s not really an unusual sentiment around downworlders amirite) 

haven’t really decided on his job yet but i’ll keep you posted!

i think that’s all i got backstory wise so let’s move on to personality!

he’s a dick

that’s it that’s all you need to know good day don’t forget to message me if you’d like to plot

jK but also not really???? he can definitely come off that way as he’s super sarcastic and kinda judgmental and has such an awful terrible temper that it’s ridiculous but he’s got some redeeming qualities as well lmao. for one he’s a #1 ride or die for life like if he’s decided that you’re worth it/his friend then guess what?? you’ve got him for life no takebacks he’s /N E V E R/ leaving your side

it’s not easy to earn that kind of devotion from him though

impulse control? ben’s never heard of it

looks like he could kill you and could actually kill you

fr he has a really bad temper and will immediately resort to throwing hands which is probably why he has such a great talent for getting himself into trouble

absolutely tactless and relentlessly blunt but you can always always count on him to tell you the truth no matter how brutal it is

really ain’t afraid of shit

argumentative & defiant af

but also protective and loyal and individualistic and generally possesses a genuine concern for the wellbeing of others, of course especially towards the few people he’s close to (who are most likely to be fellow werewolves/downworlders tbh)

UPDATES!

ben is the alpha of the werewolf pack, which means that he’s in charge of the los angeles wolf pack. he’s been the alpha for about a year, winning the title upon killing the last alpha in battle.

i sorta have this headcanon that the last alpha was really strict and had a lot of wolves who disliked them, so many members of the pack were actually pleased that ben took over as the leader.

tbh at first ben didn’t care much about being the leader though. he has always cared about his fellow werewolves but it was honestly all about the power for him at first. due to never really having much control over his life (hell, he didn’t even have control over becoming a werewolf), ben simultaneously hates rules but also has this downright compulsive need to seize power wherever he can get it most of the time.

so it was all about the power for him at first. he essentially let the werewolves do whatever they wanted, allowing them to run rampant across the city and most likely piss off tons of local shadowhunters and the vampires as well i’m guessing. 

things are a little different now though! he still loves being in charge and honestly enjoys having the power (isn’t afraid to flaunt it either), but with tensions seemingly rising among all of the downworlders & shadowhunters, he’s definitely started to take his role as the alpha a lot more seriously in recent months.

he’s very protective by nature and woooow can you bet that he’s ridiculously protective of the pack. those are his people. he fights beside them, he fights for them and he’d even die for them if it ever came to that, wouldn’t even have to think twice or hesitate. loyalty is major to him. he hates traitors and he’s fiercely loyal to his pack. he’s 100% a dick as previously mentioned but he also makes a point of treating every single member of his pack with the utmost respect.

i think a lot of his contempt for shadowhunters/the clave/the accords probably comes from his fierce devotion to the wolves. like it’s so obvious (to him) that the accords aren’t fair for all downworlders, but he especially resents that they aren’t fair for his people and so he hates the clave and harbors a very strong dislike for the shadowhunters who uphold the unjust rules

lmao tbh any wolf in his pack can probably recite his “the clave and their rules are bullshit” speech word for word at this point

yes he definitely has a “the clave and their rules are bullshit” speech

time for another headcanon! so i got this super cool idea that ben lives in this big abandoned building/makeshift loft and aside from the hunter’s moon bar it’s become this hangout/refuge for the werewolves. if anyone in the pack needs somewhere to stay for a while then they’re absolutely welcome there at all times and it’s sorta just a general hangout for the wolves like they know that they’re just welcome to walk in through the front door whenever they want and go through his fridge or watch tv or take a nap lmao like whatever they need

so just to reiterate: he’s very into fighting for the rights of the werewolves and extremely vocal about it. he’s been the alpha for about a year now and at first it was just a party all day every day but with things among the downworlders and shadowhunters seemingly getting worse and worse every day he’s decided to try for some more structure in recent months. he absolutely considers the werewolves to be his people and he holds a great respect for all of them and is fiercely loyal to everyone in his pack (also protective af). for the most part the wolves are basically still free to just run wild across the city lmao but ben has just taken a more active interest in looking out for them and keeping them safe recently.

all that being said, he still comes across as a dick most of the time lmao. being an alpha has definitely taught him a lot thus far and it absolutely makes him a better person but it’s not always evident and yeah at the end of the day he is still kind of a dick and that’s just the tea on that

that’s about it i think and even if it’s not i think that i need to stop rambling at this point so just message me if you’d like to plot because i’m literally down for anything and everything! i’m really looking forward to meeting you all!

[doggo-fiends-on-a-spaceship]

okay so we talk about all the shadowhunters characters watching mundane movies together before, right (usually star wars or something) but look, recently i was reading a fic and there was a line that was, basically summed up: “a mundane movie?” “are there any other type?” 

what if there was tho

like downworlder movies, run by downworlders. the tragic love story of a warlock and a mundane (that magnus refuses to watch after the first time he cried a lot) or a rom-com between a werewolf and a vampire, or a really bad cheesy flick about two werewolves, or a seelie drama that’s full of dramatic plot twists and love triangles, or a vampire movie that’s just full of puns, or a really sweet chick flick where a vampire falls in love with a mundane and she ends up voluntarily becoming a vampire to be with her vampire girlfriend, or a rom-com between a warlock and a vampire who both think the other is a mundane and keep trying to hide the truth with increasingly hilarious shenanigans, or magnus’s favorite, a buddy comedy about two warlocks. shadowhunters being portrayed as everything from “basically stormtroopers” to “evil and heartless” to that that one series wherein they’re actually characters and no one admits it but they kind of love it because it’s so overdramatic, but also kind of lovable (a downworlder shouting at some shadowhunter ��you’ll never be like [insert name of character], you [insert reference]!” and the shadowhunter is just like ???? because none of them have ever seen these movies before.

like just movies made by downworlders, full of downworlders and downworld things. some of them aren’t even set in the downworld, it’s just most of the cast are downworlders. like a movie set in a space station or something, and a vampire plays the lead. a werewolf plays the love interest, and it’s hilarious because they don’t get along at all on set, except that they kind of do. a seelie who plays a ridiculously handsome love interest in a movie about spies. a warlock who plays like, an x-man or something, and mundanes who might see it are like “wow cool costume/makeup” but surprise bitch, those scales are fucking real 

and like after the whole mortal war thing, there’s a series of really bad movies based on it. and like there’s actually a chick-flick based on magnus and alec, which magnus thinks is hilarious. later there’s an actually serious romance movie based on them about a warlock and a shadowhunter falling in love and magnus watches it whenever he misses alec once he’s gone oops i’m crying

and okay this is less likely because of the clave and warrior culture but shadowhunter movies. there aren’t very many of them, and most of them are terrible or meant for children or both, but they exist.

and it’s hilarious because like, half of the characters are always really bad actors with stiff expressions and shit, and the other half are super passionate and like throwing themselves into the role. as a kid, isabelle desperately wanted to star in one of these (and she probably gets to at some point).

but they range from really shitty romances, usually stemmed from arranged marriages or propaganda of some sort, to like actually funny comedies but it’s like, shadowhunter humor, dry and morbid and shit. there’s a few super racist downworlder characters that alec, izzy, and jace look back on wincing super hard because shit, yeah, now that they think about it, vlad the evil vampire and seymour blade the greedy warlock were super racist, wow. 

but what shadowhunters are really good at? war movies. movies about battles and swordfights and shit. holy fuck they’re good at that. they use real blades. sometimes, they even use actual demons. because shadowhunters are fucking badass. and they’re great at the political dramas and tangled webs of conspiracy. there’s this one spy movie that’s basically shadowhunter james bond and it’s amazing. jace and izzy had a crush on the “bond girl” equivalent, a kickass lady shadowhunter, and alec had a crush on the james bond guy, a hot shadowhunter dude who wore eyeliner. but the thing about the movie is the plot is actually really good, even though the actors really suck in places and it’s great

and like okay so now imagine all our faves having movie nights and they just

everyone’s all curled up in magnus’s living room (or they take turns in various places, and god knows what would happen if maryse found out that they’d used the institute once) and magnus has conjured up more space/extra chairs and shit. everyone’s welcome, but people outside their circle rarely come (”are you crazy??? all those shadowhunters and powerful downworlders and shit??? nah thanks”) and like

magnus and alec are cuddled ridiculously close on a loveseat, being sickeningly adorable and kissing each other’s cheek and shit. maia and simon sit on the couch together and get a little closer each time. for a while, clary and jace sit very far apart, but once they start to get their shit together they slowly gravitate closer. raphael sits next to magnus and alec so he can poke magnus and annoy him whenever he wants. ragnor sits next to raphael so he can help. catarina and dot usually sit together on some beanbags because they get along super well, and they enjoy the same kinds of movies so sometimes they gang up on the others and it’s a little terrifying. luke often sits between clary and where simon and maia are sitting, as they are the ones he’s closest to. meliorn sits on a beanbag next to izzy, who sits cross-legged on the floor with a large bowl of popcorn that several people steal from shamelessly. she lets them, and always makes extra (or rather, asks alec to, because she always burns it).

okay but there’s a big mix of shadowhunter, downworlder, and mundane movies? and like you can tell exactly which each one is just by looking at the cover

but like magnus being intrigued by the james bond shadowhunter movie, like “wow i didn’t know shadowhunters were good at spy drama. nice. wow did they really do that stunt? that’s badass”

and maia and simon like the werewolf/vampire rom-com ;) 

and clary just really loves the downworlder movies?? especially the cheesy rom-coms, because those are her favorite. especially when they has happy endings

or maybe luke is the only one of them who’s seen both shadowhunter and downworlder, so he likes watching the mundane ones more, but his favorite will always be a shadowhunter movie he watched as a kid about shadowhunters in WW1 because it was so interesting to him

or alec convincing them to watch the series with the overdramatic shadowhunters and all the downworlders are losing their minds as the shadowhunter on the screen (who is very clearly a seelie with makeup runes drawn on, and half of them are nonsense- alec points this out to magnus, and he giggles and says that’s the best part) does a completely unnecessary backflip and ends it on a cheesy line and all the shadowhunters immediately turn to jace like that’s you. 

meliorn wants to watch one of the seelie dramas because he lowkey loves them and even he can’t predict the plot twists sometimes and sometimes he’s just sort of clinging to izzy like oh my god. oh my god. isabelle. look. oh my god. i think she’s the mother. holy shit. and izzy’s like i know oh my god this is so great!!

dot wants to watch star wars, because she still has a crush on leia and also she just likes the plot. simon enthusiastically agrees. magnus agrees on the condition they watch the star trek movies at some point, too. catarina claims to have dated natalia portman for a short time. no one but simon believes her.

ragnor what do you mean he’s dead? fuck off don’t know what ur talking about wants to watch the warlock buddy movie, because he was an extra in it so you can see him the background for like three seconds at a bar, and he never stops rubbing it in magnus’s face that he was in a movie, ha, and magnus is like “i just haven’t gotten around to doing one yet!” “uh huh, sure”

at some point, they have a disney night and it’s amazing. everyone loves disney night. even though half of it is critiquing and pointing out flaws, they all have a lot of fun, and half of them are singing along the whole time. (magnus singing “under the sea” with way too much enthusiasm, maia sings “once upon a dream” beautifully and simon sings the other part, jace sings “let it go” extremely off-key, clary sings “colors of the wind”... not very well). pirates of the carribean is probably the best-received one by all of the, though, although lilo and stich might have it beat

i know this would probably never happen in canon and i’m just dreaming but i don’t even care i love this idea

[flower-of-the-desert]

So I just finished s01 of Shadowhunters and I have some thinky thoughts about it. I’m putting it under the cut because it’s not all positive (well, most of it isnt really) and if you are a die-hard malec shipper, you should probably skip this.

Overall, I think my opinion so far can be summed up as this show has a lot of potential to be really good and interesting and nobody seems to want to do anything about it. I mean the set up is great - demons threatening the world? Awesome. A secret society of warriors whose purpose is to protect the world? Nice. Magic? Warlocks? AU worlds? Perfect. Class issues between the races? Homophobia? Relevant and important concepts to tackle. So in theory everything is great. But in practice? Not so much.

I think the two main issues this season has are 1) thngs happening way too fast and not enough time and focus given to certain topics and characters in order to understand their motivations and the worldbuilding of this universe and 2) the problem with show, dont tell - that is to say we keep being told things but almost never shown anything to actually back up these claims.

Now I know there are time limits and you cant fit everything into a single episode or even a single season and you shouldnt have to. I’m not saying they should have crammed everything into 13 episodes. That is not the issue. The problem is that when topics that should be given due focus and time within the specific episode arent, things get confusing. For example, why did Alec decide to marry Lydia? We find out in the next episode that he’s decided to restore the family honor on his own terms after finding out about his parents’ past. Which is great. We have Alec’s motivation. But in the episode itself where he proposed everything was set up for him to follow his heart. That was the theme of the episode and Alec through the entire thing kept agreeing with Magnus and whoever else was telling him to do what he wants. Only for him to turn around simingly out of nowhere in the literal last minute of the episode and decide to get married. Dont get me wrong, I dont have a problem with him NOT choosing to follow his heart given the situation but there wasnt enough focus on his struggle between the two during the episode in order to make his last-minute turn seem less weird. And that doesnt even cover Lydia’s side of thngs. Why did she decide to get married to a literal stranger after meeting him like yesterday? And this is not an exxageration - Alec proposes literally 2 or 3 days max after Lydia shows up. Is she that desperate to run an institute? Wouldnt she be allowed to have the position if she’s not married? Why does it even matter - doesnt it make more sense to give her the position based on her skills and results on the job? We dont know. But these are the sort of worldbuilding questions you might want to answer.

This is just one example of how things are going way too fast and there’s not enough time given to explain the characters and universe properly. There are more but if I keep going, we’ll be here tomorrow too. I’m not even gonna bother to cover all the scenes that just flat out do not make sense cause then we’ll never leave.

The other thing bothers me even more - there are sooo many things we are TOLD but never really SHOWN - Alec has been in love with Jace for I dont know how many years, Alec is repressed, the SH society is homophobic (admittedly we are not told this in canon, I dont believe? but that is at least the implication made), Magnus is in love with Alec and Alec feels the same, Magnus is a centuries-old warlock, one of the most powerful people in the world, Ragnor is even more powerful, etc etc. But. Where is the evidence? If Alec has spent so long being in love with Jace and repressed, wouldnt it have been more difficult for Magnus to get him to agree to a date than one half-assed phone call? Wouldnt Alec be struggling even more with accepting that Magnus is interested and panicking about what to do, denying everything with all his might? Shouldnt there be more struggle here?

So far I havent seen any signs of anyone in the Institute being homophobic. Maybe that changes in s02 but so far? Nope. Even Alec’s parents whom fandom for some reason has decided to demonize as some kind of terrible scumbags are not homophobic and actually hella decent people all things considered. Lydia is not homophobic. The goddamn Silent Brother seemed more interested in the kissing scene than anything else.

Warlocks are supposed to be hella powerful yet Magnus needed Alec’s help to fight off ONE circle member and Ragnor got killed by a TINY demon thingy that even Clary can handle. We were told Magnus cares so much about that necklace he’d risk his life to get it back yet 5mins later just casually gives it away to Izzy and doesnt mention it again. 

Clary and co LOVE to make these passionate speeches about how they’re the new generation of shadowhunters who respect the downworlders and believe everyone is their equal and the Clave is wrong - yet the moment a downworlder refuses to help them, they have no problem blackmailing, focing, lying and going behind their back to get what they want. And this is admittedly not a bad thing to show that these people despite their good intentions cant just change over night, if the narrative at least acknowledged their hypocrisy as a sign they need to grow some more but it doesnt.

Again, I an keep going but I wont. And finally there’s Malec. By all accounts I think this is the thng that disaapointed me the most. It could have been so awesome if developed properly! Like again we have a great set up - two people from opposite sides of the war, leaders to their respective groups, meeting and falling in love against all odds - it’s basically every enemies to friends to lovers fic ever and it’s AWESOME. Except not really because the way they play it in canon is just what even? So they meet and Magnus is obviously sexually attracted to Alec and wants to pursue that. Cool. Alec is... feeling whatever it is he’s feeling, I honestly cant even tell if he was interested from the start or just happy someone was paying attention to him. I suppose that stuttering scene when Magnus introduces himself is supposed to show he’s interested. Or something. Then Magnus calls to ask him on a date which yay, makes sense with how eager he was when they met. And then Alec agrees. And this is where things start going wonky for me.  Why does he agree so easily? Isnt he supposed to be in love with Jace? Isnt he supposed to be terrified of anyone finding out he’s gay? Next scene after they heal Luke, Magnus goes you’ve unlocked something in me and I go was it your dick? Because this line for all its romantic vibe and whatnot in the context we’ve been presented so far makes no sense. Because now the show wants me to believe that Magnus fell in love at first sight. Except this is not how they played it - what I saw was Magnus being really fricking horny. I did not see any grand revelations of omg, I just fell in love for the first time in over a century with this hot piece of shadowhunting ass I just met. Now I’m supposed to believe Malec has had enough development and enough scenes together to warrant such a strong emotional reaction from Magnus two episode after meeting Alec and after like 2? 3? scenes interacting with him. Insert the sure jan gif here.

Fast forward to the wedding - awesome scene really. Kiss and all (such a hot kiss and I ask why arent they kissing like that in s02 instead of these we’ve been married for 50years and cant wait for one of us to die already pecks?). But again, it only works if you ignore the context and take it as a stand alone scene. Because otherwise the emotional depth that it’s supposed to have? Goes out the window to stand besides all the emotional and mental development that was needed between them in order to make the scene really work and resonate on a deep level. And dont even get me started on how wrong Magnus acted at the beginning of the episode.

I can buy - at a push, a big big BIG push - that Magnus fell in love from the start but I absolutely do not believe Alec did as well. Honestly, I dont believe he loves Magnus even now in s02 (I havent watched it yet but I have enough context about some of their key scenes to say this, there is no way I man in love would tell his boyfriend not to take a treath to his life PERSONALLY, amongst other things). And that is just sad. Because this could have been a great love story, all the fire and passion and fireworkd like we keep getting told there is but what we see is something different.

[compulsiveshipper]

Alec: What’s one thing you still have from your childhood? Magnus: … Magnus: My insecurities?

[rhosyn-du]

Title: A Wonderful Institution Artist: @bidnezz​ Pairings: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, various background pairings Word Count: ~53k Warnings: graphic depictions of violence, discrimination against Downworlders, reference to rape, Clave-typical homophobia, implied character death, minor character death Summary: Magnus doesn’t have time for this bullshit. Warlocks are disappearing in New York City—five people in less than three months—and Magnus is determined to find them and protect the rest of his people from whatever took them. He doesn’t have time for politics, and he certainly doesn’t have time for whatever nonsense the Clave is proposing about marrying a Shadowhunter to a Downworlder as part of the new Accords. He doesn’t really have time for a pretty Shadowhunter who’s surprisingly kind to warlock children, either, but, well, he’s always been good at multitasking.

Alec always knew he couldn’t have what he wanted, but he’s spent the nearly four years since the newly-appointed Consul recalled his parents to Idris without explanation making the best of what he can have. When life suddenly offers up almost everything Alec actually wants on a silver platter, he can’t quite bring himself to trust it, especially when it comes with a million caveats and a side of impending disaster. But he knows how to handle disasters, even if the return of the Circle on top of Clave secrets that could destroy the Accords is way beyond the disasters he’s used to fielding. Hope, on the other hand? He doesn’t know what to do with that.

This fic was created for the @malecdiscordserver​​ Mini Bang 2020.

Chapter One

Magnus should have taken it as a sign when, instead of sending the information he asked for, the Spiral Council insisted upon an in-person meeting. He should, at the very least, have rescheduled cocktail night, but he wasn’t about to let politics or the headache that had been building behind his eyes all day interfere with standing traditions. If nothing else, he desperately needed someone to drink with.

“How is it,” Catarina asked as she slid into their usual booth, “that I just finished a ten-hour shift at the hospital, and you still look more worn out than I do?”

Magnus shook his head, raising his glass. “Drink first, my dear. Then talk. This is not a conversation anyone wants to have sober.”

“Cheers, then,” Catarina said, lifting her glass. “No Raphael tonight?”

“He’s overseeing the integration of a new fledgling. Ragnor also sent his regrets.”

“Ragnor has sent his regrets every week since 2003,” Catarina muttered into her cosmopolitan.

“And will continue to do so for years to come, I’m sure,” Magnus said.

“We’ll see about that. Come here.” Catarina motioned for Magnus to join her on her side of the booth.

Confused, Magnus joined her. “What are we—? Are we taking a selfie?”

“We,” she answered, smiling up at her phone, “are showing Ragnor how much fun we’re having without him, so he’ll be jealous and forced to show up for cocktail night sometime this decade.”

Magnus held up his drink, toasting the camera as Catarina snapped a photo, then frowned. “Since when does Ragnor have a smart phone?” he asked, watching Catarina tap out a text. “Or any kind of phone, for that matter.”

“Last month, I think?” she answered. “Raphael got it for him. Said texting was more convenient than fire messages, but honestly I think he just likes to give Ragnor a hard time about being such a Luddite.”

“But now I can’t tease him about still being stuck in the nineteenth century,” Magnus complained. “Also, how do you have his number and I don’t?”

“I’m guessing the same reason you look like you haven’t slept in the past month. You’ve been a little hard to get a hold of recently.”

Magnus made a noise of grumpy agreement.

“You want to talk about it?” Catarina asked.

“Why don’t you tell me about your week first?” Magnus suggested. “I’m still not ready to think about mine.”

Magnus was on his third bourbon on the rocks when Catarina finally got him talking about his own day and the disastrous meeting with the Spiral Council.

“Five warlocks missing in less than three months, and they brushed it aside like it’s nothing,” Magnus told her. “They called me there like they actually had information, but no, just ‘we haven’t heard anything, we’ll keep an ear out’ and then straight into this absolute nonsense with the Clave.” He drained the last of his glass and conjured another, too worked up to bother walking over to the bar to order. “As if it’s not suspicious enough that they want to renew the Accords years earlier than scheduled, as if marrying a Downworlder to a Shadowhunter as part of the terms isn’t among the most terrible ideas in the Clave’s grand library of terrible ideas.”

“Let me guess,” Catarina said. “They want you to be a part of the negotiations?”

“Oh, no,” Magnus said, waving his glass in a way that would, in anyone else’s hand, have sent the drink sloshing over the sides. “If they wanted that, it would be annoying enough, but they actually had the gall to suggest I should put my name in for consideration as the Downworld representative in this disaster-in-the-making political marriage.”

Catarina made a strangled noise that might have been outrage but might also have just been choking on her drink. “They actually…” She shook her head. “The Spiral Council wants you to marry a Shadowhunter? And they think this will prevent war with the Clave?”

Magnus shook his head. “No, no, they don’t actually want me to marry anyone. They just want my name on the list. Something about how much it would mean to have such a visible sign of my support. Which they will not get, because, as I explained to them repeatedly and at great length, I do not support any of this. And that’s not even getting into my lack of confidence in their assurances that I wouldn’t be chosen.”

“They’re probably right about that,” Catarina told him. “Rumor is the Clave is putting forward one of the Lightwood children, and I can’t imagine a world where Maryse and Robert Lightwood would allow one of their offspring to marry you.”

“Somehow, the council failed to mention that part.” Probably because they knew how Magnus would react. This lunacy was bad enough without the Clave deciding the child of two former Circle members, one of whom was rumored to be the Consul’s personal enforcer, was the best person to make a political alliance with the Downworld. “That’s a bullet I’m more than happy to have dodged.”

“What, you don’t see yourself having a mad, passionate romance with a Lightwood?” Catarina teased.

Magnus wrinkled his nose in distaste. “As amusing as it would be to see the look on Maryse Lightwood’s face if I did, no. I would rather marry a Ravener demon.” He took a long pull of his whiskey. “I would rather marry Lorenzo Rey.” He drained his glass, setting it down on the table with a resounding thump. “I would rather see acid wash jeans as the height of fashion for the next three and a half centuries.”

“Only three and a half?” Catarina laughed. “Not four?”

“Even a Lightwood couldn’t be that bad,” Magnus told her. “Another round?”

“That’s all for me. I’ve got another shift in the ER tomorrow, and the last thing I need is a hangover to go with it. I’m happy to keep you company, though. Seems like you could use it.”

“Your company is very much appreciated, as always,” Magnus said. “I’ll just—”

Magnus’s train of thought as well as his sentence were effectively derailed by the arrival of a fire message. He plucked it from the air with a frown that only deepened as he read.

“It looks like that’s the last drink for me, as well,” Magnus said, gathering his coat from the seat beside him.

“Anything I can help with?” Catarina asked, nodding toward the paper in Magnus’s hand.

“I’ll certainly take it if you’re offering,” Magnus answered slowly. “This could be very bad.” He couldn’t, after all, think of any good reason Iris Rouse would be calling him for help.

“Alec, you aren’t listening to me.”

Alec took a deep, calming breath, focusing on fastening the buckles of his thigh holster rather than how very done he was having this conversation for the hundredth time.

“I am listening, Iz,” he said, sliding the last buckle into place. “I just still disagree with you. And since this is my life and not yours, my opinion is the one that matters.”

Izzy grabbed his arm, forcing him to face her. “This can’t actually be what you want. If Mom and Dad are pressuring you into this—”

Alec snorted. “Trust me, Mom and Dad aren’t pressuring me into anything.” It wasn’t exactly a lie. They weren’t pressuring him into this, not really. His mother made her disapproval quite clear, for all that she’d also said this marriage was necessary for the updated Accords.

Izzy’s eyes told him she wasn’t convinced. “I know Mom has said some things about how you should be looking for a wife,” she said.

“I’m pretty sure Mother meant I should marry a nice Shadowhunter girl,” Alec said. “Come on, Iz, do you really see our parents pressuring me into marrying a Downworlder? Even for the Accords?”

“Then why?” Her hand on his arm was a gentle pressure now, cajoling rather than demanding. “You keep saying this is your decision, but you won’t tell me why you’re making it.”

Alec sighed. This wasn’t something he wanted to talk about, not even with Izzy, but it was clear she wasn’t going to let it drop until he did. “Because someone needs to do it, and I at least won’t resent it.”

“Are you sure about that, big brother?” Izzy’s eyes were intent on his, and Alec both loved and hated how she could always see his deepest doubts and fears, even when he’d pushed them down so far he could almost forget them himself. “You deserve to be happy, Alec. You deserve to fall in love with someone who loves you just as much. And I think that’s what you want, too.”

“It doesn’t matter what I want,” he said, shaking off her hand. “This is what I’ve chosen.” This was what he could have. At least in an explicitly political marriage to a Downworlder, no one would expect him to act like he was in love with his wife or ask questions if they didn’t have children.

If he were very lucky, maybe his future wife would be open to adoption.

“But you can still make a different choice!” Izzy insisted.

“Isabelle,” he said. “Drop it.” 

Izzy opened her mouth to speak again, but Alec cut her off. “Come on, we’ve got a mission.”

He stalked out of the room before Izzy could say anything else, but her irritated huff of breath as she followed him to the ops center told Alec she wasn’t anywhere near as done with the conversation as he was.

They picked up the trail of Ravener demons just east of Prospect Park. Signs indicated maybe six or seven in the pack, which was worrisome since the original sighting was of more than twice that number.

“I can trace the trail back, see if it splits,” Jace suggested. “You guys follow this one and I’ll catch up with you.”

“All right,” Alec said after a moment’s hesitation, “but if it does split, call the Institute and have them send another team, then catch up with me and Iz. Do not go after the other group on your own.”

“Obviously,” Jace said, completely at odds with the hint of a smirk that told Alec that was exactly what he’d been planning to do.

Alec just barely refrained from rolling his eyes.

A quarter mile on, the trail split again, and Alec nodded to Izzy, indicating he’d follow left and she should follow right. He didn’t bother telling his sister to be careful. She might not always be exactly prudent, but she was very good at gauging what she could and couldn’t handle in a fight and had significantly better self-preservation instincts than Alec’s parabatai.

Alec made it another three blocks before he caught sight of one of the demons, darting from behind a dumpster to slink down a dark alleyway. Activating his night vision rune, he pulled an arrow from his quiver and turned down the alleyway after the demon.

There was no movement in the alley, no sound to be heard over the ambient noise of the surrounding streets. Alec scanned each dumpster that lined the alley, each pile of debris, searching for the place the Raveners had to be hiding. Ravener demons were fast, but not fast enough to make it to the far end of the alley so quickly.

A small sound drew Alec’s attention. It wasn’t the scuffling he expected, but instead something that sounded almost like a tiny, muffled sob. He focused on the area it came from, arrow nocked and ready.

It took Alec a few seconds to really register what he was seeing, sticking out from behind a pile of broken-down boxes. The toe of a small shoe. As he watched, the shoe retreated behind the boxes.

Alec lowered his bow as he moved toward the pile of boxes. Not all the way, because there was still a Ravener around here somewhere, but enough that he could approach without pointing it directly at the hiding child.

He debated speaking, which might put the child more at ease, but could also attract the attention of the Ravener, and any of its buddies that might be hanging around. He didn’t know who the demons were hunting, either. With so many at once, it was almost certain they’d been summoned by a warlock to track and probably capture or kill someone, and Alec couldn’t begin to imagine why someone would go to that kind of trouble for a kid, so they probably weren’t the target, but he didn’t want to take the chance that he was wrong, especially since the kid was clearly hiding from something.

Splitting the difference between the two options, Alec dropped to a crouch when he drew even with the pile of boxes and spoke in a soft voice.

“Hi there.”

He waited a beat, and when no reply seemed forthcoming, continued. “You don’t have to come out if you don’t want to, but this isn’t a safe place to be right now.”

Still, nothing.

“Okay, well, if you don’t want to come out, is it okay if I come back there with you for a minute? I just want to make sure you’re safe.”

Again, silence. Alec waited.

After at least a full minute of silence, Alec heard movement behind the pile of boxes, and suddenly he was faced with a terrified-looking little girl. She looked to be maybe six or seven years old, if Alec had to guess, and even though fear was evident in her eyes and posture, she met Alec’s eyes without flinching and there were tiny blue flames flickering across the fingers of one small hand.

Alec forced himself to keep a relaxed posture, even as he kept alert for any sign of the Ravener demon. It was just barely possible that the Raveners were after a warlock child, although Alec still couldn’t imagine who would send a pack that size after a kid, even a warlock kid.

“That’s a good hiding place,” he said conversationally. “I almost didn’t notice you.”

The girl regarded him with somber eyes.

“Can I walk you back home to make sure you get there safely?” he asked.

This time, she shook her head emphatically, but the flames around her fingers died, which Alec took as a good sign.

“Okay,” he said. “We can stay here for a while if you want, but I need you to promise that if anything happens, you’ll get behind me, okay? There are some scary things out here, and you don’t have to face them by yourself.”

The girl cocked her head to the side, considering, then nodded.

“Cool gills,” Alec commented, nodding at the girl’s neck. That got him a tiny, shy smile. “I’m Alec.”

The girl chewed her bottom lip, then said softly, “I’m Madzie.”

Before Alec could respond, a Ravener sprang from the shadows of a nearby dumpster, heading straight toward them. In one smooth move, Alec turned on his knee, placing himself squarely between the girl and the demon, and let an arrow fly.

He didn’t bother to watch the arrow find its mark—he knew it would—already turning to loose another arrow at one of the two demons approaching from the other direction. The second demon was too close to use his bow by that time, so Alec pulled his seraph blade from the sheath along his thigh and rose from his crouch to drive the blade straight into the demon’s chest. He felt a faint, sharp pain in his knee, probably a rock or piece of broken glass he’d kneeled on. He’d deal with it later.

A sound from the mouth of the alley had Alec spinning again, seraph blade abandoned in favor of his bow once again. He had an arrow nocked and ready before he properly registered what he was seeing. The man standing in front of him, watching him with open curiosity and something else that made Alec’s breath catch in his throat, was most definitely not a Ravener demon.

The door to Iris Rouse’s home stood open several inches when Magnus and Catarina stepped out of the portal on her front stoop. It hadn't been broken down or torn from its hinges or apparently forced open in any way, which Magnus might have considered a good sign under different circumstances. Given the recent disappearances, however, the door hanging peacefully ajar seemed ominous.

The two warlocks entered cautiously, but the house was eerily silent and apparently empty, with nothing to indicate that even a struggle had taken place. It was an all too familiar scene.

Magnus swore softly. It wasn't just a missing warlock this time, though. There was also the matter of Iris's message. Please, you have to save the children.

“We’ll need to search the house,” he told Catarina. “Not that I expect to find more here than I have anywhere else.”

“You never know,” she said. “Today could be your lucky day.”

“Seems unlikely, given how the day has gone so far.”

They decided to search top to bottom, and both agreed that splitting up would be a terrible idea. The first two rooms yielded nothing, exactly as Magnus expected. The third door, however, gave the first sign of something out of place. For one thing, it held two sets of bunk beds and a crib, plus a number of stuffed animals and a toy box tucked away in a corner. For another, the window stood open wide, white lace curtains fluttering in the breeze.

Catarina looked over the room, eyebrows raised. “Did you know anything about Iris raising kids?”

Magnus shook his head. “I haven’t spoken to Iris Rouse in over two centuries. I knew she was living in Brooklyn, obviously, but we were never exactly friendly, and we’ve been happy to keep right on avoiding each other. I guess this does give some context for her message, though.”

Catarina made a noise of agreement, kneeling to examine a stuffed rabbit that lay on the floor.

Magnus turned to look out the window, where a tree branch bobbed lazily in the wind. It wasn’t sturdy enough to hold his weight, but he thought it just might have been sturdy enough for someone smaller to grab a hold of and shimmy down, if they were determined enough.

“I think—”

A faint sound caught Magnus’s attention, causing him to pause mid-sentence. Catarina nodded, and gestured toward the closet. She’d heard it, too.

Magnus made a motion for Catarina to stay behind him as he approached the closet door. He wasn’t sure what to expect when he used his magic to fling the closet open, but it definitely was not the mundane woman who launched herself at him, teeth bared and fists flying.

Magnus stepped back, raising a hand to restrain her with magic. For a moment, the house was still and silent again. Then, the silence was broken by the unmistakable wail of an infant.

“You can’t take him,” the woman snarled, struggling against her magical bonds. “I won’t let you.”

It was a ridiculous thing for her to say. A mundane woman—barely more than a girl, Magnus realized, now that he was really looking at her—didn’t have a chance against two warlocks. But there was no doubt in Magnus’s mind that she meant what she said. If he and Catarina tried to take the baby nestled among the blankets at the bottom of the closet, this woman would do everything in her power to stop them.

“We’re not here to take anyone,” Magnus said in his most soothing voice.

“We’re friends of Iris’s,” Catarina added. Not exactly true, but close enough. “I’m Catarina, and this is Magnus. We’re here to help.”

The woman still looked suspicious, but when neither of them made any move toward the closet, she stopped fighting the bonds. Magnus released her as soon as she looked like she wasn’t in danger of trying to commit violence upon him. She immediately ran to the closet and scooped the infant up in her arms.

“I’m Leigh,” the woman told them, rocking the baby as its cries subsided. “They took Iris, and the children, too. I hid Noah, and I think Madzie might have gotten away, but I don’t know. There were just so many of them.”

“Who did?” Magnus asked. “Who took Iris and the children?”

Leigh frowned, her face going slightly vacant. “I don’t know. There were so many of them. They weren’t there, and then suddenly they were, but…” She looked at him, face all confusion. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

Which, of course, it wouldn’t, to a mundane. Except this mundane was apparently living with a warlock. Or at least babysitting for one. So, when the kidnappers dropped the glamor that kept them hidden, it seemed to her that they appeared out of nowhere.

Magnus had been paying more attention to Leigh than to the child, listening to her confused explanation, but he caught Catarina’s pointed look at him, then at the baby in the woman’s arms. She, at least, had been paying attention to the child.

Magnus glanced at the infant. At first, he didn’t see it, but then the baby blinked, and a second set of eyelids, like those of a raptor, closed across its eyes. The infant was a warlock.

“You’ve been through something very traumatic,” Catarina said, slipping into the voice Magnus had heard her use with patients. “It’s normal to be confused. Why don’t you sit down for a minute?”

“I…” Leigh still looked dazed. “Yes, thank you.”

“You said the people who came here took Iris and the children,” Magnus said. “What can you tell us about the children? It could help us locate them.” Not that he had high hopes, if they were warlocks like the baby. He hadn’t been able to track a single warlock who had disappeared. He couldn’t even sense their magic, which meant they were most likely dead, although no bodies had turned up.

“Madzie is the oldest,” Leigh said. “She went out the window when those things—” She stopped, shaking her head. “When the people broke in, and we saw them grab Dierdre and Indra. They must have broken in. I wanted to go, too, but I didn’t think the tree could hold my weight, and anyway I couldn’t climb down with Noah, and I couldn’t leave him.” Her voice was climbing, becoming more panicked.

“So, you took him and hid in the closet,” Magnus finished for her. “It was a good plan. You said Madzie escaped out the window?” he asked, latching on to the one piece of information that might be useful. If a child had escaped, there was still a chance he might be able to find her.

Leigh nodded. “I heard them come into the room after. I thought for sure they were going to find us, but they never came near the closet. I heard them follow Madzie out the window.” She frowned. “Except, that doesn’t make sense, either. Because an adult shouldn’t be able to climb down that tree, so maybe…” She trailed off, shaking her head.

Adult humans, no. But demons? There were plenty of demons small enough to climb down that tree. Hell, there were plenty of demons that could scale the side of the building, and several varieties that could fly.

“Can you show me something of Madzie’s?” Magnus asked. If he had something of the girl’s, if he wasn’t too late, he could track her. He might even be able to find her before the demons did. Or at least find the demons.

“Something of— Why?”

“Something familiar to comfort her when we find her,” Catarina lied smoothly.

“Oh,” Leigh said. “Oh, of course. There,” she said, pointing to the stuffed rabbit Catarina had noticed earlier. “That’s Mr. Flopsy. He’s Madzie’s favorite.”

“Thank you, dear,” Magnus said, grabbing the stuffed toy. He looked at Catarina. “I’m going to look for the girl. As soon as she’s recovered enough, take them back to the loft. They’ll be safe there while we figure out what’s going on.”

“We’ll see you there,” Catarina answered. Then, when Magnus hesitated, “We’ll be fine. Go.”

Magnus had no trouble at all picking up Madzie’s trail, which was on the one hand convenient, but on the other hand meant the demons probably weren’t having much trouble tracking her, either. The one solely good piece of news was that Magnus was able to recognize the girl’s magic from the residue on the toy, and he could still feel its echo out somewhere in the city. If the demons chasing Madzie had found her, at least they hadn’t killed her, yet.

It didn’t take him long to pick up the trail of the Ravener demons following Madzie, either. A warlock had scrubbed all sense of their presence from Iris’s house, but the trail popped up clear as day at the end of the block. Which suggested that whoever was controlling these demons hadn’t gone with them after the girl. They must have gone with Iris and the other children, wherever they’d taken them.

The trail led him half a mile east of Prospect Park before he heard the distinctive growl of a Ravener about to attack. Magnus ran toward the alleyway from where the sound had come, magic ready at his fingertips, only to stop dead in his tracks when he rounded the corner just in time to watch a Shadowhunter neatly dispatch three Ravener demons in rapid succession.

The man’s movements were fluid and efficient, arrows hitting their marks dead on before taking down the final demon with a seraph blade in a move that looked almost effortless even as his forearms flexed in a way that Magnus couldn’t help but appreciate. More impressive than the man’s skill at taking down demons, though, was the way he did so all while keeping himself between the threat he faced and the young girl behind him. The young warlock girl.

Shadowhunters were pledged to protect the world from demons, and even the most repugnant ones Magnus had the misfortune of meeting seemed to take that job seriously, but he’d met precious few who would put forth even the slightest effort to protect a warlock, not even from a demon.

Then the Shadowhunter was turning to face him, and Magnus found himself struck once again, because the man was stunning, with bright hazel eyes, full lips, and a jawline that could cut glass. He also had an arrow trained straight at Magnus’s heart.

Magnus searched frantically for something to say. Something witty and flirtatious, perhaps. Or something dignified and professional, as would befit the High Warlock of Brooklyn under such circumstances. Or just something that would reassure the Shadowhunter that Magnus wasn’t a threat.

What actually came out of his mouth was, “Who are you?”

For the briefest instant, Magnus thought he could see the hint of a bewildered smile on the Shadowhunter’s lips, but it was gone almost as soon as it appeared.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?” the Shadowhunter countered. Then his eyes flickered to something behind Magnus, and Magnus whirled around to face a truly staggering number of Ravener demons pouring into the mouth of the alley just as an arrow flew past his shoulder to hit one of the demons in the chest.

“Kill demons now, introductions later?” Magnus suggested, tossing a ball of fire at the closest demon.

“Sounds like a plan,” the Shadowhunter agreed. “Stay behind me,” he instructed the little girl. “Keep your back to the wall.”

They fought surprisingly well together for two people who hadn’t even known each other long enough to exchange names. Without discussing it, Magnus handled the demons who managed to get into close range of their little group, while the Shadowhunter took down those further back.

“You know,” Magnus said as he watched another demon burn to a satisfying crisp, “normally I’d ask what a guy like you is doing in a place like this, but I get the feeling you might just be a killing demons in dark alleys kind of guy.”

“Not as many dark alleys as you might expect,” the Shadowhunter said. “And usually not this many demons at once.”

“Or with quite such charming company?” Magnus suggested. Only two left. “Because I certainly don’t.”

“Well, you’ve done a pretty decent job of proving you’re not the one who summoned the demons, at least.”

The Shadowhunter’s arrow hit one of the remaining two demons just as his own flames took down the other.

Magnus gave the Shadowhunter a sidelong glance. “Glad to know being in mortal peril helped with my credibility.”

Magnus turned to face the little girl, who was clinging to the leg of the Shadowhunter’s pants and crouched down to her level. She shrunk back from him, and after a moment’s hesitation, he unglamored his eyes. “Hi, my name is Magnus. Are you Madzie?”

The girl eyed him warily, then nodded once.

“Iris called me for help when the demons attacked your house, but I didn’t get there before you left. I’m sorry I wasn’t faster.” He pulled the stuffed rabbit out of his coat. “Leigh said you’d want Mr. Flopsy when I found you.”

The girl grabbed Mr. Flopsy and watched him shyly. “You know Nana?” she asked in a quiet voice. “Can you take me to her?”

“I’m sorry, sweet pea,” Magnus said, “but I don’t know where your nana is right now. I’m going to do everything I can to find her, though. And I can take you where Leigh and Noah are now if you want. My friend Catarina is taking care of them.”

Madzie looked at him for a long moment, then up at the Shadowhunter. “Are you coming?”

The Shadowhunter’s face showed a flicker of surprise before melting into a soft smile. “Yeah, I can come. I just need to let the rest of my team know where I’m going.” He glanced at Magnus, still smiling, and oh, Magnus was in trouble. “Where am I going?”

“My loft,” Magnus answered, too aware of the answering smile he had absolutely no control over. “In Brooklyn Heights. I’m Magnus, by the way.”

“Alec,” the Shadowhunter answered, his smile widening and making him somehow even more stunning. “I’m gonna,” he gestured over his shoulder awkwardly, eyes never leaving Magnus’s.

“Right,” Magnus said. “Call your team.” Finally, when it was nearly over, his day was starting to look like it just might make up for a little of the shitshow it had been.

“Yeah,” Alec said. And then his legs buckled beneath him.

Acting on instinct, Magnus reached out to steady him. Alec fell against his side, unable to get his feet back under him, and Magnus very intentionally pushed the way Alec’s back muscles felt beneath his hand to the back of his mind with a mental note to revisit that later, preferably not in the middle of a crisis.

“Sorry,” Alec muttered. “Sorry, I can’t—”

“There’s nothing to apologize for,” Magnus told him. “Are you injured?”

“Left knee,” Alec said, wincing. “Thought I cut it on some glass. Just need to—” He pulled out a stele and activated his iratze.

Nothing happened.

“I’m going to wager a guess,” Magnus said, leading Alec to lean against the nearest wall, “that it was not glass. Let me take a look.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Alec protested. “I just need to get back to the Institute.”

“Nonsense,” Magnus waved him off. “I’m right here, and it’s less effort to just heal whatever is wrong with you than portal you back to the Institute.” Probably. Maybe. “Besides, I owe you for rescuing Madzie.”

Alec’s voice was sharp when he answered, “You don’t owe me for that. She needed help and I was here. And it’s my job,” he added, an obvious afterthought.

“Then,” Magnus said, crouching down to examine Alec’s knee, “consider this my way of saying thank you.”

It didn’t take him long to find it: a small wound just beneath Alec’s thigh holster. Madzie crowded in beside him, and he let her look, hoping the small size of the wound would ease her fears that Alec was seriously hurt.

“Demon venom,” Magnus concluded. “Not much or you wouldn’t still be conscious, but it’s been in your system too long for your iratze to help. I’ve got a potion that will take care of it back at the loft.”

It was a testament to how badly the venom was affecting him that Alec just nodded instead of arguing. Or maybe he really did take Magnus’s line about a thank you at face value. Either way, he let Magnus put an arm around him and help him off the wall.

Magnus was about to open a portal when two more Shadowhunters dashed into the alley.

“Alec!” the dark-haired woman cried, rushing toward them.

“‘M fine, Iz,” Alec mumbled, very clearly not fine. “I’ve got everything under control,” he explained, before promptly passing out on Magnus’s shoulder.

[freedomtofandom]

LORD OF SHADOWS by CASSANDRA CLARE **Review**

Alright peeps, I’m back. If you’re wondering why my blog has been so dead this summer it is because I was in a technological dead zone for the majority, only being able to connect to wifi once a week if I was luck, I do like to live on the edge ;). But I did have time to read this gem, and even though I’m late on the train per usual, I will still voice my thoughts!

To start things off, I would give Lord of Shadows an 8.5 out of 10. I was very pleased with this book and the ending left me screaming (with both rage and sadness). To be completely honest, I still haven’t stopped thinking about this book and wondering HOW IS EVERYTHING GOING TO GET RESOLVED WITH ONLY ONE BOOK LEFT IN THE SERIES!! THERE ARE SO MANY LOOSE ENDS! I CAN’T EVEN IMAGINE HOW LONG THE NEXT INSTALLMENT IS GOING TO HAVE TO BE!!!

I can be calm, I swear! This book had a delightful dark undertone, with thought provoking themes and situations that boggle the mind. The plot is a series of unexpected twists and the determination of a family to stay together no matter the cost. The book brings into play the question of, “how far would you be willing to go for the ones you love?” And, “how far is too far?” And, “does it even make a difference?”

The characters were extremely well fleshed out, well plotted and three dimensional. The world of Shadowhunters was brought even more starkly to life and the situations these characters were thrust into was both heartbreaking and frustrating to the point of actual critical thought. 

Ok, spoiler time. If you haven’t read the book, turn back now! DO NOT READ THIS PART IF YOU HAVE NOT READ THE BOOK!!! I’M WARNING YOU! YOU ARE MISSING OUT ON A GREAT BOOK IF YOU ONLY GLEAN YOUR INFORMATION FROM HERE!! The Blackthorns are back in the middle of a terrible situation, Julian and Emma especially as they struggle to at first put aside their feelings for each other and then, when that doesn’t work, hide their feelings from each other. Lets just say, Shadow hunters are notoriously bad at communication. Anyways, Emma knows that parabati who love each other grow to be too powerful, leading to the death and destruction of those around them whom they love. That is real dumb, I hate it, I keep hoping there is a way around it, but each option seems worse than the one before. So then, all these centurions show up at the L.A. Institute and since they are special and elite, they think they just own the place! Christina finds out that perfect Diego is actually engaged to Zara, another centurion who is the legit worst! We find out later that she is part of a rising group within the shadow hunter ranks called the cohort, who want to register downworlders and limit their general lives. Thats right, the cohort are shadow hunter Nazi’s, which lovely little Kit points quite frequently. I really appreciated Kit’s presence in this book, because he gave us an outsider view of shadow hunters, always baffled by their refusal to use “mundane” medicine and anything else that could be actually pretty useful. Anyways, he buddies up with the twins, Ty and Livvy, who take him under their wing in a sense. About mid way through, after attacks by squid demons, we find out that Malcolm is in fact, not dead (big surprise) and he still needs Blackthorn blood. The kids end up escaping to London. Meanwhile, Mark was tasked with the job of rescuing Kieran and Julian, Emma, and Christina followed him into Farie. They end up accomplishing this task and then meeting the seelie queen who promises aide to the shadow hunters in a war against the unseelie king in exchange for the black book, and she also tells Julian of a way she knows to break the Parabati bond. They all end up back in London, the unseelie king sends the riders of Manon after them all, Emma kills one. Annabelle shows up when Emma and Julian go to hunt her, Magnus Bane gathers everyone back together. Annabelle shows up again, agrees to testify to the Clave. Magnus passes out right before the meeting, Annabelle goes crazy with the mortal sword in the middle of testifying, Robert Lightwood dies and LIVVY! LIVVY IS STABBED WITH THE MORTAL SWORD!!!!!!! (RIP MY HEART!)

So, that’s the basic overview of what exactly is going down in this book and I actually skipped a few things because I want to get down to the analyzation of what exactly I think is going on here. 

“He forced the thought back. He could hear Emma’s voice, a whisper in the back of his mind. A warning. But Emma was good in her heart: honest, straightforward, a terrible liar. She didn’t understand the brutality of need. The absoluteness of whet he would do for his family. There was no end to it’s depth and breadth. It was total” (Clare, 654).

This is one of many quotes that delves into Julian’s mental justification of his actions throughout the book, whether good or bad. Anytime Julian lies, plots, manipulates, and terrorizes in the name of his family he always comes back to the question of, “how far will I go?”. And every time, he comes back to the conclusion that there is literally nothing he will not do to protect and defend his family, there is no low he will not sink to. The problem is that this blurs when it comes to things that he wants/desires as well, namely, Emma. Protecting your family is a good and honorable cause, yet destroying every parabati bond ever made simply because you made the mistake of being parabati with the person you are in love with is really overboard. The parabati rely on each others power in battle and even for life saving healing. To take that away would be devastating and tragic, and yet Julian considers it. Emma seems to be his only voice of reason at the moment, his only impulse control, that why I was actually expecting her to die in this book. Take away Emma and Julian becomes a villain, Malcolm 2.0. His motives are constantly marred, he is often referred to as “ruthless” and even admits that Emma is the only one who is truly holding him back from the edge.

I predicted in Lady Midnight that Julian would become a villain, and I am still sticking to that. His and Emma’s only hope of getting their curse problem fixed was through Robert Lightwood, he seemed understanding and willing to work with them. He’s dead now and I’m assuming the next counsel is going to be terrible. Therefore, Julian and Emma are going to continue to try to fix things on their own, until things really get out of control.

Also, something is up with Cortana, I think Emma is getting power from more than just the wacked up parabati bond and the fact that Cortana broke the mortal sword means there is going to be trouble in the next book for her. We’ll see what happens.

Predictions? Livvy’s not dead (PLEASE!!), Emma dies, Julian turns evil. I will go into more detailed predictions later, probably closer to the release of the third book after more research, but this is what I am sticking with now. I will also go into some further analyzation when I have my brains more together, the ending of this book really worked a number on me!!

If you can’t tell, I really liked this book!! It was great! Chat with me if you have any comments, I definitely did not cover everything and love talking about books! :D 

Stay curious my friends! Never stop reading!!

[thegreatmercutio]

Breaking up?...A character reflection of Alec. (Long rant).

“Alec has always been focusing on work and all the Shadowhunting and all that. Normally, he would have found out all this immediately but he’s caught up in something new which is this relationship. Now, is that a bad thing? No, it’s not a bad thing. It’s a good thing that he’s doing this but he’s finally doing this. But he has to be able to balance these two things: the world of his work and the world of his relationship. The second half of this season we’re gonna be dealing with that issue of balancing that work and life and his failing to recognize his sister’s issue is part of the reason he feels this need to dedicate himself to his work.” - Matt

I really do not know the direction of the show, the cards are open for all form of possibilities. We as a fandom can only speculate that possibilities. The best we got are the assumptions.

But what I have learned about promotions and “talks” coming from the Shadowhunters camp, is not to take them too serious. Their job in the promotional factor is to spike up all those assumptions. They want you to question the “what ifs?”

Does this mean breaking up Malec, not really. He stated that Alec is very new to this experience…but as Matt stated…“Ultimately, Alec is a twenty-something year-old guy who’s been closed-off for quite some time. Honestly, I think that he’s been thinking about this for years. He wants this.”

Alec is falling in love, he is very proud of his relationship with Magnus. Repetitive reminding others that he still in a relationship with Magnus, that wedding kiss wasn’t just for a statement but a declarations of his feelings for himself and for Magnus.

He’s telling his mother off, and having an open party to the Shadowhunters guests to let them know…we are “together.” Alec is very serious about Magnus. But still this is Alec, he often holds a lot guilt over things that he can’t control and that always frustrates him. Jocelyn’s death, Jace leaving and joining Valentine, and now Izzy’s addiction. And to add, he blamed Magnus for Izzy, that’s going to add more to his guilt and his list of stupid choices. He has always holds people “well being” on his shoulders. Now, there’s threats that a sword might take Magnus away from him and destroy the Downworlders and also nobody knows that Jace has demon blood (or does he???). But there will be a big clip hanger for episode 10. It’s what mid-season finale does, so expect that.

But Matt talked about balancing, which is something I do wanna see, because this will show Alec’s growth as a character. He’s still the head of the institution but he also Magnus’ man. You can have a career and be in love, it has been happening for 1,000s of years. Will he have to focus more on his work now, well yes. The whole shadow world is tearing apart. The clave is useless. The Downworlders doesn’t trust the Shadowhunters even more now. He needs to step up. He has expressed how very “upset” he was for being the “last to know”.

But what about Izzy? Izzy just another reminder for Alec of his old martyrdom again. Izzy’s addition is NOT Alec’s fault. That’s should be clear. He did ask her, how she is? She is an addict, she is going to tell him what she needs him to hear. She can’t have him stop her, because he would. Any of them would. Should Alec have notice more? Yes and no. But you must understand, the signs are just starting to show. Alec isn’t really the last to know. (Actually Jace and everyone else is…thats not Alec, Magnus and Raphael). Alec knows now that addiction started due Aldertree’s suggestions, there’s a lot manipulation happening and there’s a break of trust within the Institution. There’s a hidden agenda somewhere there. Alec doesn’t even know the illegal torturing of Raphael yet. But yet again, this is the same Alec who went with Lydia decision in torturing Merlion for answers. He is willing to do terrible things for his family and his loyalty for the clave. There’s is a lot of shades that needs a lot of notices. Alec isn’t done reflecting yet. He’s learning that his shadowhunters traditions are flawed and broken. He can’t be that man anymore. He can't be turning a blind eye. But what does this Mean? It’s means Alec needs to continue to evaluate. He’s needs to address the relationship within the institution and with the Downworlders. Because he is taking back his title as the head of the institution and he is in a romantic relationship with a Downworlder, a High Warlock. These are new identities for Alec.

But break up. I don’t think that should happen. It would be a flaw decision for the show. Focusing on work would be more of, “I might be late tonight” or “we might have to reschedule.” Which would be more annoying due to the amount of interruptions that we have already experienced so far with 2A...but that doesn’t mean that at the end of the night…it’s Magnus that’s in Alec’s arms or Alec in Magnus’. And another really big Factor! Magnus has responsibilities too. which this show needs to address more. He is the High Warlock. Magnus is a very busy individual. We haven’t even seen the reactions of Downworlders to his relationship with the enemy. (This is another conversation to have).

And why would you break them up, after Magnus showed his concerns about being treated as a “one night stand.” Why stain their character, paint Alec as another douche bag? That would be just terrible. Being with Alec means a lot to Magnus. (Another conversation too).

Let’s really focus here, Izzy’s addiction does remind him, he needs to focus. But here’s the “what ifs?” I am offering. In this courses of trying to be the good son, the good brother, and the good soldier, he has found himself feeling lost, which he was in season 1…now he’s falling back to his old ways again and that’s the lesson for Alec…why would he? Why put yourself in these positions of pain, self doubts…you cannot control things that can’t be control. Izzy’s behavior was her own, Jace leaving was his own, Killing Jocelyn, was the demon…very terrible and very heartbreaking events…yes, but all this is not Alec’s fault. The poor guy’s subconscious told him to jump off a building…due to all the guilts. He even told Magnus, I am responsible for you. But Magnus tells him, he can take care of himself and please come to me if those “thoughts” returns. Literally, “we are on equal grounds. Talk to me, I am here.” Why would you want to lose Magnus, when he’s only one who wants to be right beside you? Holding you together. Why would Magnus let Alec go? When for the first time for so long he’s taking a chance to love and be loved.

Here, this is my assumptions…Alec is going to learn to let go. Redesign himself, be more open, honest with himself…and hold those responsible for their actions, well…responsible. He can’t keep holding their weight and the weight of world. He’s going to learn about being selfish, putting himself first, not Jace, not Izzy…not his parents…not the institution. Him. That does sound mean. He will always love him, he always help them, be there for them…but he needs to stop enabling them. He’s going to help Izzy, but she needs to fight too. He’s mental health is already at risk, for long time now. Before Magnus, he’s has been hurting himself in accepting himself…for the first time. He putting his feelings first, but now he going to think because, “I was selfish…now Izzy is hurting…the institution is falling apart…father is cheating on mother.” Alec needs to learn…to learn that those factors has nothing to do with his life outside of family and duties. And Being with Magnus…he can faces all this and also let go of it…and only take control of the factors that can be controlled…and it can done together. He doesn’t have to be alone.

Guess we will see.

[alligotleftismyjim]

TV SERIES ASKS shadowhunters /and/ star trek (both please 😁) cause I'm nothing if not predictable & a total stan of ur blog

Kay, so this took a whole lot longer than expected cause college decided to dump shit on me all at once so some of the Shadowhunters feelings are out of date but I don’t have enough time to go back and rewrite all that but I’m just gonna have a brief scream about ep10 cause good goddamn that was intense. And I’m gonna apologize for the massive post ahead but I’m on mobile and don’t know how to do a read more so if you don’t want to read my thoughts on Shadowhunters and Star Trek, feel free to scroll by. Secondly, @sybil-branson-jr I’m so sorry it took me so long to answer this and I’m totally not worthy to have such an awesome follower like you and your blog is awesome and sunny and makes me happy 💛💛💛💛

send me a tv series and I’ll tell you:

Shadowhuntersmy all-time ultimate fave character: MAGNUS BANE. He’s my all time fave for so many reasons but mainly cause he’s such a complex character and we’re FINALLY getting to see more aspects of his personality and it’s really really nice to see my sexual orientation represented in a way that doesn’t make it seem like all bisexuals are up for threesomes and that we can’t be in a monogamous relationship

a character I didn’t used to like but now do: I absolutely used to hate Maryse. But after ep8 and the seeing her begin to realize her past actions were pretty shitty, she’s starting to grow on me. I’m a fan of multi-dimensional characters and seeing her struggle with being a good (emotions cloud judgement) shadowhunter while having to go through the thing with Robert and trying to be a good mother while still following orders and wanting her son to be happy but still having trouble accepting downworlders is really interesting to me. You can tell she really does want Alec to be happy and that she really does care for Jace but she is still a shadowhunter and that creates a really interesting internal struggle that I really wanna see more of.

a character I used to like but now don’t: This doesn’t really apply? Cause I love them all. Valentine is a massive asshole but he makes a really good villain. And Iris was just introduced this season and again, she’s supposed to be a villain so you were never really supposed to like her.

a character I’m indifferent about: I’m pretty indifferent about Lydia but it’s mainly because she hasn’t been in that many episodes and we don’t have much of a backstory for her. We know she was in love and he was killed so now she’s dedicated to her work. But that’s about it. She’s a badass shadowhunter and I’m dying to see more of her.

a character who deserved better: ALL OF THEM. They all deserve to be happy and not have to worry about the literal world ending. Magnus deserves recognition for the sheer amount of stuff he does to save everyone and he deserves to not be treated like shit because he’s a warlock. Alec deserves to be happy with his boyfriend and not feel so guilty over feeling like he failed as a shadowhunter because he couldn’t keep Jace from Valentine, he let a demon into the Institute and he killed Jocelyn. Isabelle deserves better cause the smartest shadowhunter in the Institute doesn’t deserve to be relegated to an almost background character whose current storyline revolves around drug addiction. Jace deserves better cause poor guy was psychologically and physically abused by Valentine, then rescued, then forced to go on the run because the Clave thought he was working with Valentine. Luke deserves better because he had just gotten Jocelyn back and then Valentine’s demon killed her. And he’s been such a good father figure to Clary and Simon but we’ve barely seen him this season and so far he’s lost the love of his life, reunited with his sister only for her to be taken from him by the man who betrayed him and turned him into a werewolf, and was lied to and tricked by one of the only people that’s still alive that he cares about. I could go on and on.

a ship I’ve never been able to get into: Alec and literally any female character ever. He’s gay. As in into guys. He’s not bisexual. He’s not straight or pansexual or anything else. He’s gay and his boyfriend is the High Warlock of Brooklyn. And I’m not super into Alec x Jace but that’s mainly because I can’t see them as anything other than brothers and parabatai.

a ship I’ve never been able to get over: MALEC. And it’s not just because they’re the only canon couple on the show. I just love their dynamic and the fact that they’re both figuring out their relationship together. Matt and Harry’s chemistry makes the relationship feel so real and natural and I applaud them for caring so much about Magnus and Alec and how dedicated they are to getting the relationship right.

a cute, low-key ship: I’m so here for Clary x Isabelle. We got a few Clizzy scenes last season and early on this season. And before the whole yin-fen mess, they were getting closer and their relationship could easily read as the beginnings of a romantic relationship.

an unpopular ship but I still enjoyed it: I’m not really sure what ships would be unpopular? Cause I’ve seen people ship just about everyone with each other? And typically the really unpopular ships are unpopular for reasons I agree.

a ship that was totally wrong and never should have happened: I understand why it happened but I am definitely not a fan of Magnus x Camille. I fully respect that Camille helped Magnus out of a bad place in his life but abusive and manipulative relationships are never ever okay. Thankfully, everyone seems to agree that Camille was a terrible person and I haven’t seen anyone ship them romantically. I’ve only ever seen Camille as an ex in fics or as someone who causes tension between Magnus and Alec.

my favourite storyline/moment: the wedding kiss scene will go down as one of my absolute favorite moments but I’m a big sucker for any malec scene. I absolutely lost it when Alec met Madzie and I really wanna see Alec with more small children now.

a storyline that never should have been written: I’m not a big fan of the yin-fen storyline just because I don’t seen much of a point to it right now. I’m trying to keep an open mind because so far, the show has been amazing. I really hope there’s a point to this whole storyline so I won’t say I don’t think it should’ve been written yet, but I’m just not a fan.

my first thoughts on the show: the whole reason I started watching was because I saw people on my dash royally loosing their shit over some couple (malec) on some fantasy show (shadowhunters). I’m a sucker for an awesome canon couple and once I started watching the show, I marathoned all of season 1 in like three nights over the summer. I’m a sucker for a well done fantasy show (early seasons of Supernatural) and, slightly questionable special effects aside, I felt shadowhunters was really well done. For being based off a book series with a questionable author and for seemingly flying under the radar until the show, I was completely taken with the characters and the storylines.

my thoughts now: I’m in love. I’m completely obsessed. As you can tell, my blog has completely shifted from a Star Trek blog to a Shadowhunters blog. Part of that is from the lack of Star Trek on my dash and not having new content every week like a tv show, but I’ve also fallen in love with the characters and storylines and I firmly believe that this cast is the most amazing cast ever. They care so much about the show and their characters and they all seem like they’re awesome friends.

Star Trek (I’m gonna do the reboot movies cause that’s what got me into Star Trek and I have more opinions about the movies than any of the tv series)

send me a tv series and I’ll tell you:my all-time ultimate fave character: LEONARD H MCCOY 4LIFE. I love my grumpy southern doctor who acts like he doesn’t care but actually cares so deeply about his friends and everyone on the ship cause man can I relate to that

a character I didn’t used to like but now do: not applicable because they are all my children and I love them all

a character I used to like but now don’t: again with the not applicable

a character I’m indifferent about: Carol Marcus. Which is mainly Abrams’ fault since he apparently has a phobia of giving out characters’ backstory. I’d love to see more of her because I think she’s incredibly brilliant and she’d be a great addition to the rest of the crew.

a character who deserved better: ALL OF THEM! Kirk deserves to not feel like he’ll never live up to his dad’s legacy. Spock deserves to not feel like he doesn’t fit in anywhere because of his half Vulcan-half human heritage. McCoy deserves to be treated like a goddamn part of the triumvirate because he fuCKING IS. I AM SO SALTY ABOUT HIM BARELY BEING A PART OF THE BIG THREE IN THE FIRST MOVIE AND BEING PRACTICALLY WRITTEN OUT OF MOTHERFUCKING SECOND MOVIE. PRAISE THE LORD FOR STAR TREK BEYOND AND THE INCREDIBLE LEONARD MCCOY BEING TREATED LIKE THE VERY IMPORTANT MAIN CHARACTER THAT HE IS. I have lots of feelings about how his character has been treated and I could rant forever about it

a ship I’ve never been able to get into: I was never really able to get super into any ships that had Chekov in them just because Anton looked so young in the first two movies. But then Beyond happened and apparently Chekov was hitting the gym on the five year mission cause our friendly Russian navigator got ripped.

a ship I’ve never been able to get over: MCKIRK. I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP!!! The grumpy southern doctor loves the literal ray of sunshine captain. And the literal ray of sunshine captain loves the grumpy southern doctor. And they’re already such good friends and obviously care about each other (“I couldn’t just leave you there lookin’ all pathetic”). They just seem to fit together. McCoy is able to ground Kirk when he’s in danger of getting too wrapped up in his own head and Kirk is able to bring out McCoy’s more adventurous side and they just make each other better. I could continue to wax poetic but this post is already gonna be massive

a cute, low-key ship: Spuhura is my jam. Like cute little finger kisses in the hallway or turbo lift or under the table in the mess hall. And Uhura being able to talk to Spock in Vulcan and give him that little piece of home is just adorable

an unpopular ship but I still enjoyed it: again, I don’t really know any unpopular ships? I can only think of Khan x Bones but I don’t see much of it and I really don’t like it.

a ship that was totally wrong and never should have happened: Khan x anyone. I just can’t get behind that. Especially Khan x Bones. Just nope.

my favourite storyline/moment: I really enjoyed all of Beyond simply because it felt like it finally got back to the root of what Star Trek means: to explore new cultures with an open mind and offer up the best of humanity. So that’s probably my favorite storyline. My favorite moment was probably when it was revealed, in a completely un-dramatic way, that Sulu was gay. It was such a small moment but the reveal was done is such a quiet and nonchalant way that, it seemed to me, the writes sought to normalize the fact that Sulu has a husband and an adorable daughter. Which is awesome. Whenever a straight character is revealed to have a spouse or children, there’s never this big dramatic reveal so why should it be any different for a same-sex couple? I dunno. I just thought it was a really sweet moment and a nice nod to George Takei and the original series. Plus we had Simon Pegg basically say ‘fuck it’ and made everyone some orientation other than straight.

a storyline that never should have been written: I don’t get why they had to kill off Amanda in the first movie? Like? Spock’s planet was already destroyed and it’s not like he and Kirk bonded over both losing a parent? It just seemed pretty pointless to me plus all the scenes we got with Spock and Amanda were so sweet. I would’ve loved to have seen more of them

my first thoughts on the show: I think I remember being immediately engrossed in the movie. Since it opens in space, I was instantly pulled into this amazing futuristic world. And then I got to see cocky young Kirk and bby Spock then cocky older Kirk and sassy older Spock. AND THEN I got to meet my favorite salty southern doctor and I was never the same

my thoughts now: *aggressively hums theme music* I love Star Trek so much. To me, it showcases the best of what humanity has to offer and it shows us how to embrace other cultures and beliefs. Especially with the current political situation (I’m in the US), it’s seems more important now to be tolerant and accepting of people from other cultures and ethnic groups. I saw a post going around a little bit ago that was talking about how the person thought they should honor Anton. They pointed out Chekov was always supposed to show how the US and Russia would be able to overcome the tension between the countries. So the OP said they thought it’d be a nice nod to the original point of the character of Chekov to have a new navigator on the Enterprise and have them be a Muslim woman and I whole heartedly agree. I don’t want to see Chekov be killed off. Just have him be transferred to another ship and let the Enterprise have a new badass Muslim lady as the navigator. Or any other minority that is underrepresented