#The universe is sending me a message

[seerauber-entartete]

Me: I should really read “unmasking autism” but I have so many other books I haven’t read yet and I’m moving. I won’t buy it until I finish moving and read at least ONE of the books I have. Office email: We’re starting a book club and we’ll be reading “unmasking autism.”

Me: …well, I guess I have an excuse to go to the bookstore this weekend!

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

can we stop the trend of putting traumatized and mentally unstable characters into romantic relationships as their “happy endings”?

[batsplat]

It's a thing I already knew but all your beautiful analysis really made obvious (to me) how much of a grudge holder vale is. That man is never letting it go he's gonna hold his grudges into his grave

you know, I do think this is an interesting issue, because I'm not sure this is true of all his grudges. just sticking here with the grudges he accumulated in his capacity as a competitor, rather than just his general approach to life or whatever... how you judge this will kinda depend on how you feel about the 'reconciliation' he's experienced with some of his rivals - and whether you read the whole thing as sincere or not. now, personally I reckon he still dislikes biaggi, but also you are allowed to just dislike people so I'll give him a pass for that. some of the others, I'm a little more convinced by the whole reconciliation schtick

let's get valentino's take:

interesting that he mentions those three together, isn't it? and like, he's still not messaging biaggi or inviting him to his home - "even with max" kind of tells you all you need to know - but the other two? they said some proper nasty things to each other over the years!! I mean, the casey rivalry, there's some remarks from both sides where quite frankly I think I would struggle just a touch to get over it

I don't know, obviously this could all be pr stuff, but I kind of feel like... y'know, why bother? it's 2022, you're retired, who gives a fuck? sure it's a good look to be all magnanimous, sure it can be a bit of a way of twisting in the knife to the guys left in the cold, but also, who would care if you don't play nice? I think especially with jorge, you surely don't need to do all that, inviting him to your home and dancing with him... (which, again, some of the spats those two had...) and with the casey rivalry, if there's one guy who's still hung up about what happened between the pair of them, it's obviously casey (speaking of blokes who can hold a grudge). maybe this is giving valentino too much credit, but personally I buy it's more or less sincere. there's nothing to really indicate he's still particularly bothered by any of their past disagreements - he's basically going for the 'all's fair in love and motorcycle racing' approach. he knows he was an asshole, he accepts they were assholes too, whatever, that's how these things work. he's generally a fan of drama in rivalries, unsurprisingly, and he was happy enough to contribute his fair share - but he does see it as fundamentally being part of the game

to point out the obvious, check out who he's left out: sete and marc. that's where he can't let go of the grudges... because it's not about the offence itself as much as it is about the betrayal. this is the thing with valentino, right, it's about what kind of bond you had with him. if you weren't his friend in the first place and then piss him off as a rival then, y'know, whatever. obviously he's going to be vicious in trying to get back at you, but also he's really not going to waste his time feeling too aggrieved by it. I mean, think about how all the bullshit between him and casey dropped off sharply post-2012... from valentino's end anyway. think about how jorge and valentino pretty quickly got on again whenever they weren't fighting for supremacy within yamaha. they weren't friends in the first place, then they were enemies for competitive reasons for a while there, then it's over and valentino is basically happy enough to call it bygones

but... if it's a certain kind of bond you had with him and then you wrong him... that little mental list of all his past grievances, all your past transgressions, that's where it comes in. that's where he ices you out. denies you any emotional warmth. ensures that any interaction going forward is conducted entirely on his terms. where even any public 'reconciliation' won't truly be sincere.... or, certainly he's not going to forget what happened. if something else happens... it's like you've always got the potential of triggering this lingering resentment, in a way, where all that past stuff is still primed and ready to be called upon. he certainly doesn't just let it go

or, as he puts it in his autobiography:

Biaggi and I never talk to each other. I mean, we've never had a real conversation, anything that's lasted more than the requisite time to insult each other or put each other down, in the nastiest way possible. In any case, I don't hate him. It's true, we've never been friends, but hatred is something different, and that's too serious a word to describe our relationship. Far too serious. No, we have a reciprocal antipathy. No doubt this is a result of what we do for a living and the fact that we both want to win every single time. And perhaps it's also a function of the fact that we have very different personalities and very different ways of seeing things. Still, I don't think this means we hate each other, as some journalists have written. I think I could feel hatred for someone, but only for someone far worse than anything Biaggi has done. For example, if I were betrayed by a friend, then, yes, I could hate him. But Biaggi will never betray my friendship for the simple reason that we are not, and never have been, friends. Our relationship is very clear: we compete on the track - outside the track, each goes his own way. You could say we detest each other cordially.

... I mean. he said it, not me. and given this book was first published in '05... biaggi can't betray his friendship because they were never friends... I'm not saying he's thinking about sete, but it has to at least be a possibility, right? he's talking about one rivalry here and refusing to even mention the other... and the one he's refusing to mention is the one where he was friends with the other bloke. I don't know, maybe that's reading too much into it! and anyway, even if this passage wasn't really about sete, it's obviously still revealing. "detest each other cordially" is essentially what he was doing with casey and jorge (or from his point of view in any case, not entirely sure they'd agree with that). the grudge comes when he feels let down by you... and then, yes, he'll never let it go

of course, he's willing to set aside his grievances for a while if there's sufficient motivation for him to do so. in 2009, when he had so definitively won that rivalry with sete, why bother kicking up a fuss? in 2016, quite frankly it was just too much, and it was getting to the point where it was obviously hurting him too. on the one hand there was the media furore that had been going on non-stop since sepang, on the other hand it was also hurting his own approach to racing. there's reports from the time how visibly aggrieved he still was in the first few races of the season, and it took until they got back to europe for him to... y'know, have fun again. it's not sustainable to be walking around with a constant dark cloud over your head and broadcasting burning resentment towards your two main rivals. certainly not for someone like valentino - he needs to be having fun! the slight rapprochement needed to happen, in a way, because otherwise those years would have been even worse for everyone involved. but that doesn't actually translate to forgetting any of those grudges. this is about convenience more than anything else

goes to show, really... most of the time he doesn't take these things personally. I talked about it a bit in this post, how maybe it's also something that changed over time for him: the question of whether he was willing to develop these kinds of bonds in the first place with competitors... because he does possess a certain level of self-awareness in terms of what these kinds of rivalries are like and what they do to interpersonal relationships. ideally, you don't want to be hurt by a friend like that, right? better not to have that kind of emotional attachment with your competitors in the first place. how unfortunate it'd be if all those years after sete the circumstances aligned for him to see a competitor as something like a friend again... because, after all, those are the only people who could betray him. those are the only people where he thinks he could truly hate them

[becca-e-barnes]

Becca what about DBF!Bucky fucking the reader until she squirts? I feel like he would be so cocky about it and would 100% try to get her to squirt again

🍑 anon

You're not wrong here, he would be so cocky and I nearly think he'd be condescending about it? In a very sexy way though 😩

I can't stop thinking of this with Bucky railing you while you're bent over the kitchen counter. The edge of the marble is digging in a little with how delightfully he has you pinned down. "Mhm, you feel like a dream." He grunts, marvelling in the glistening slick that coats his length as he drags himself slowly out of you before slamming back in again.

Your little yelp almost makes it sound like you had no idea he was going to fuck back into you so hard and it makes him chuckle quietly to himself.

"You take me like such a good girl, you know that? Happy to bend over anywhere for me and take every inch of this dick like it's all fucking yours." He can hardly control himself, his thrusts getting a little faster and it's just mind-blowing.

"Such a good girl for you, daddy. O-oh fuck, please, that's so good." You can't help but go a little stupid. His thrusts are punishing, hitting deep and hard at a pace that makes your legs a little weak but God, it's incredible feeling so much pleasure all at once.

His thrusts are landing a little too nicely though. It's a lot and there's no fucking break from it, not that you even really want one. You can feel the flutters in your tummy, gentle ripples of pleasure getting more and more intense with each thrust until you're babbling nonsense, almost ready to cry because it feels so damn good.

It doesn't take long for your head to fall onto your forearms and you feel all that build-up come to an earth shattering climax. It's a peak quite like nothing you've ever experienced before and you feel your body gushing in response, a stream of hot arousal pouring down the inside of your thighs.

Bucky's groan is fucking beautiful, clearly he didn't expect your body to react like that. "Oh god, good girls don't squirt like that, honey." His voice is so low it sends shivers down your spine.

"It really feels too fucking good for your silly little brain to handle, doesn't it? Dumb little thing squirting on daddy's cock. Go on baby, let me see you do that again. One more and then I want to feel that against my tongue."

[friday-answers]

february finally answers, but how can you be sure it's not just an echo? the voice responds, copying and mocking your own words and pleads. if you're shouting back, february, you have to be louder than that.

the definition of love is so old-fashioned. in every language, i'll shout from the mountain tops how much i am in love with you, truly. if only people would know what i really meant by it. if only you really knew what i meant by it.

if you're shouting back, february, don't let it be dismissive. i am being clearer than i ever have been. you have to understand that i'm serious. i need you to understand.

[callme-aprilroseisha04]

GIVE ME ASKS.

i don’t care what it’s about. anon hate, sonic au questions, drawing requests, writing requests, anything about that one mlb au I referenced that one time and never again, mlp, even some random franchise quotes would be nice but NOOOOO; dude ive gotten like 2 actual asks through 1 whole year of being on the tumblr™️ and im sick of it. if you see this post, your legally obligated to comment something in the asks. no loopholes. just gimme em’

[multicolour-ink]

Now is really the time for me to buckle down and find myself a new job.

[crybaby-bkg]

booie🥺i'm sorry if this is random and u don't have time for it, no worries!!! but y'know what i'm always thinking abt???

your fic, "in every lifetime" GOD, IT'S ONE OF MY FAVORITES EVER, but i've always been on the edge of my seat when it comes to villain bakugo showing up at the end. did you have any thoughts on what his life is like with you in another reality? I'VE ALWAYS WONDERED IF YOU HAVE BABIES WITH HIM TOO??? and if it's hard bc he's a villain

(i've always imagined that seeing you in another reality makes villain bakugo wanna get better for u and his daughter in his own reality, bUT THAT'S JUST ME!!) what are your thoughts??? only if you want to explore, ofc!! 🩵🩵🩵

i love u berry much in general!

CAITIEEEE MY BELOVED :D 💜💜

omg thank you so much!!!!! I always beat myself up over that fic bc I was literally like 85% done with it when I thought about villain bakugou and was like. ITS TOO LATE TO TURN BACK NOW cause that would’ve added another 3-5k words aksjdkd

but I’ve never thought about his life with you much???? but I do believe that once he comes in and gets acclimated with the others, he becomes the odd one out, instead of your Katsuki even tho you guys don’t even have kids yet!!!!

but it’s bc villain bkg does have a daughter (just one which already earns him a few scoffs) but he doesn’t….have her as much as the others do. his entire life isn’t revolved around her, he doesn’t take her hunting or show her how the world works. he doesn’t smother you in affection back home (mainly bc you won’t let him anymore) and he just becomes so isolated from the others in that sense.

but when he goes back home to his own universe, he’s a little different. he was hesitant to see his daughter often, didn’t want her to look at him in disgust and horror when he picks her up with his bionic arm, even tho the cold metal is all she’s ever known from him. he’s scared that she’ll be scared of him, that she’ll recognize his destruction on the news when she looks at him for too long. that she’ll run away in terror if he were to smile at her.

he comes over to your house the night he returns. asks if he can see her, even though its past midnight, but you let him in anyway. watch how he stands at her doorway, the soft kiss he presses to her forehead. he sits on your couch in silence for the longest moment before he speaks, his voice quiet, whispering that he wants to be there. that he wants to do better and be better. that he can’t be both a shit person and a shit father.

you give him the benefit of the doubt, but you do start to see improvements in him. he drops off her favorite snacks more, and takes her to secluded parks where he won’t be recognized. he buys her too much ice cream, but it’s only a weak apology for not being there for her beforehand. he doesn’t cause as much destruction in the city anymore, too preoccupied with showing up to parent teacher conferences, ready to cuss out her teacher for giving his baby a 92 instead of the 100 she deserved.

I think bc of his competitive nature, and especially the way the other Bakugou’s damn near cussed him out for being an absent parent and how he must be a defective version of them because none of them are this shitty—that he changes, just a little. it’s not drastic and it’s not overnight, but he realizes that he has to be better. if not for himself, than for his daughter and maybe—maybe a little bit for you too.

[kvmjb52]

ADHD STOP IT!!!

so i was really down recently that i don't have any hobbies or talents??? so i decided to get into wood whittling?? and crochet??? and working out??? and all this other shit and i keep hyperfocusing?? and i made a whole ass chart for an event in my lore??? and ANOTHER thing last night about ANOTHER piece of lore??? a really important piece too??? and i keep thinking i'm too boring but what's really happening is the ADHD is forcing me to doing tons of things for no reason??? i think i've finally had the power of Extreme and Unrestrainable Hyperfocusing bestowed upon me, but a lowly young soul? is this what the gift of joy is like??? woodworking and notes app rants??? is this true happiness??? or a curse???

[shadowednavi]

lying awake at 3:46AM thinking about my old webcomic and realizing it's technically become Lost Media with the death of flash. all that time we spent on it, now impossible to read without special programs, assuming it's still on the internet at all.

I still have all the art assets I personally made for it, but damn... several years of collective work just Gone.

[gatorlovebot]

Love, everytime you mention me or that you want more of my thoughts, I happy stim. You can bug me for my thoughts at any time, and I’ll only take it as a compliment, don’t worry. But since you asked about collaring Simon here are some of my thoughts, as a treat for you 😘 we will call this part one, where you discuss collaring without doing it yet

I think that it’s a multiple day discussion first. You first have to explain to Simon the meaning of collaring, then the different types of collars you could give him, how that may affect the dynamic, and each time you give him time to think over what it is he wants. When he comes to you and says that he likes the idea of collaring, you move on to logistics.

You bring up that while you would love to properly collar him with a more classic collar, you are worried having something around his throat that sits so closely to it will make him feel choked and claustrophobic, instead of grounded and comfortable in your dynamic, not to mention that he’d never be able to have a day collar to wear constantly since he is in the military. You’d thought of a ring, as it could be slipped onto his dogtags when not in scene, but that would make Simon too nervous in case an enemy spots it and also if you ever give him a ring, you want it to be when he takes your last name (because like hell are you allowing him to keep that cunt’s last name when you have one so much better for him). So you bring up bracelets. One for scenes that has an o-ring on it that you can attach a leash to, that wouldn’t make him feel choked or trigger any of the trauma he has with being restrained or what not with his neck, while still being able to take your puppy on a walk. And, if he wants a day collar/permanent one, you can get one of those permanent chain ones that really just look like a chain that soldered onto people. It would be small/simple enough that no one besides the two of you would think anything of it, and since he always wears full sleeves and gloves when in the field, he could hide it while still wearing it. You could even get a matching one on your own wrist or on your ankle depending on what he feels more comfortable with. You stress that Simon can decide to do both these things, only one of them, or none of them, and that it will never change how much you love him and will not change the dynamic unless he wants it to. You stress that this was just the best solution you thought of, but that the two of you can continue to workshop it, as well as experiment with different methods until you find one that works best for Simon. That there is no shame in saying that you like the idea of a collar but the reality is too overstimulating and overwhelming to actually do. There are plenty of things in kink, and just in life, that are better as fantasies than reality. If Simon finds that collars fall into that domain, that’s completely fine, you both will just have to discuss if he wants you to bring it up as dirty talk during scenes or if he just wants to keep it as a private fantasy for himself.

Simon is near tears during this discussion, but they’re happy tears. You see him so completely: you don’t try to gloss over his trauma and say “it’ll be fine, it’s not a big deal anyways so he should be fine”, you take the time to account for the different ways it may come into play and try to accommodate it the best you can while still communicating to him that your insights are limited so he will take the lead in deciding his own comfort. You dont try to lead him to ideas you think are best, or try to manipulate him into going along with them, instead the whole time you are involving him in the process and waiting for his guidance. Even with all the trauma, with all the shame and pain he deals with, you see them and don’t love him despite them but regardless. This conversation is one of the many that drives home to him just how much you love him, and it fills him with so much gratitude and love for you that it feels like it is overflowing from his soul, like no words or actions or amount of time will ever be enough to show you just how much love he has for you. It overwhelming in the best of ways, and he is more certain than ever that he wants to wear the proof of his devotion to you on his body and soul for the rest of the world to see. His inner monologue as he gazes at you for the rest of the night is just “I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you” and it’s the truth.

He loves you.

-🐶

anon, you have a way of making me so emotional with your concepts, oh my god <3

most conversations like this have to be multiple days. it just takes him a little more time to process things. like it takes him a full day to even be able to look you in the eyes after you bring up that you would like to collar him. he spends the day spiraling between blushing to himself at the prospect and then feeling ashamed about wanting to be collared like an actual fucking dog.

but he finally allows himself to come to you and say yes, this is what i want because that's why this whole dynamic is about him, him fully accepting himself and his desires.

i think he really wants to wear a collar around his neck because he just wants to be normal and doesn't want you to have to make accommodations for him. but then you're pulling out your laptop and showing him all these different bracelets you can get him, different materials and colors and he's just sat stunned at the amount of time and effort you've put into this. for him.

you go out to one of those places that does the forever jewelry. getting dainty little chains soldered onto your wrists and then when you go home you slip the leather bracelet around his wrist as he falls to his knees in front of you, nosing underneath your shirt and letting his head rest against your warm skin as he sinks further and further into puppy space.

i like to view the puppy dynamic as simon's way of saying, i trust you. he allows you to see every part of himself because you've proven time and time again that you can handle every part of him. that you want every part of him. when he allows you to slip a leash into the o-ring of his bracelet and he spends the day following you around the house it's his way of saying i trust you with all of me, my wants, my needs, my body, my soul.

[alrunaaa]

not my boss at work suggesting to keep tally of how often I sneeze at work…………………

[intriq]

currently struggling to think of how clark kent would act if you were his ex and he wanted you back.. bc someone requested i add him to my little post of that

please flood my comments with your headcanons of that. you'll be dutifully credited, of course. bc idk how to write for him

[thereareeyesinsidethetrees]

I have to wonder how many people would yell at me if i said my evidently very unpopular opinion about stan (which. does include people who put ford down to raise stan up. kind of)

is. is this genuinely something i would be insulted over? possibly, i mean ive been insulted over things like this before

im just. wondering what the reaction would be

anyway hi everyone hows your day/night been goin. hopefully well. im thinkin about writing something for the ‘shermie helps stan save ford au’ later. maybe something for the ‘ford gets cursed door’d AU’ too. something nice, something ominous

[dent-de-leon]

I love Withers, I want to just have my PC hang out and play cards with him sometime

[cherry-bomb-ships]

bro i just thought u should know that abt a month ago my mom came across this keychain

i think it was an omen. foreshadowing

BRO AINT NO WAY 😳😳😳 How did you forsee this phase of my life inadvertently I'm shaking