#WAS he married

[adashulaz]

Kpp'Ar has a ring, like he just has a random ass ring. I don't even think anyone else ever wore rings, not even the married couples wore rings. Which means, Kpp'Ar is the only character(at least I think) to be wearing a ring.

Why is this man just wearing a ring? Like what's the purpose of him wearing a ring? Why is it so damn thick? Is it like one of those fidget rings? Or is he just wearing a ring for the fun of it?

I have so many questions bro. Like, why on his middle finger? Like is it supposed to help him somehow? Like does his middle finger have tremors? Is the joint all fucked up and the ring helps somehow?

I need to know why Kpp'Ar is the only character with a ring.

[kennethbrangh]

John Turturro on working with Christopher Walken in Severance.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

historical drama/sitcom where two gay best friends (woman and man) get lavender married--and proceed to spend the Fancy European Honeymoon their parents paid for acting as each other's wingman

[moonilit]

[akelafang]

Golden Age King Arthur accidentally gets sent back in time to the beginning of his reign. While making his way to Camelot hoping to find Merlin and figure out how to get back to his own time he runs into Agravaine making his own way to Camelot for the first time. Knowing he was a traitor working for Morgana in his own timeline, Arthur kills him and decides to take his place. No one had seen Agravaine since Ygraine's death, there were no portraits of him in the castle, and Arthur's premature greying hair has to be good for something other than Merlin calling him a silver fox. He can pass as his own uncle and be the caring advisor that young him deserved damn it!

[groboart]

damsel in distress 💕💅

worth losing an extremity to be carried by THE spiderman 😩😩😩😩

[keypostos]

caleb is the biggest advocate of happy wife = happy life.

in the morning, he waits for you to wake up so he can attack your face with kisses. he starts by smoothing out your hair, poking at your cheeks, and running his fingers across your lips.

your giggles are worth missing that extra hour of sleep anyway.

he plants kisses on your cheeks, forehead, nose, and finalizes with a brief kiss on your lips, leaving you to rush in for one more. and who is he to deny his wife?

okay—technically—his girlfriend. but still.

after your slow morning, caleb decides to take you out for lunch. he holds you close when you walk; his arm is wrapped around your shoulder the entire time. when he feels you lean into him for more (of his body warmth, but he doesn’t have to know that), caleb explodes. he probably runs hotter after that too.

he leads you through grocery stores (“do you think we need this for the fridge?”), flower shops (“caleb, i think this would look great on our dresser”), and the tire shop (“pipsqueak, you really need to get these tires fixed. good thing you can always rely on me, though!”).

you browse for things to make his apartment more homey. he looks for items to stock your (our—as caleb likes to say) fridge with. you joke and bicker and hide your heads when you get stares from older ladies for being too loud. you’ll laugh about this when you get home.

later, for dinner, caleb decides he’ll cook for you at home with the groceries he bought today. he made a new special tonight: some kind of pasta with chicken.

and no matter how many times you insisted on helping, caleb used his evol to push you back onto the couch. but, when you snuck over to him and grabbed his waist, he surrendered. any reasonable man would. how could he not surrender when you nuzzled into him, begging him to let you do something.

at dinner, he cut up your chicken and fed you until you started making pregnancy jokes. what a dream that would be, caleb thought.

then, at night (probably 10pm), you two start heading to bed. caleb hops in the shower with you (“could this be my reward for cooking for you today?”) and runs his hand through your hair; shampoos and conditions it; rubs body wash all over you; and rinses you off.

you repeat the same actions to him, except you like to mess with him ten times more. you rub soap everywhere, but you paid special attention to his abs. and biceps.

though, caleb didn’t say a single thing. he had to fight back the urge to smirk when your hands rubbed up and down his arms. this might’ve been heaven for him.

when you got out, you asked (begged) if you could shave for him. caleb had been growing a bit of stubble, and you’ve always expressed your interest in shaving him since he started growing hair.

so he props you up on the bathroom sink, standing in between your legs while you carefully run the razor up and down his jaw. you’re so gentle with him—much gentler than he usually is when shaving himself.

your fingers prod all over his jawline and cheeks. your featherlight touch sends sparks all over his face, and he can’t help but break out into a smile (even when you scold him). scratch what he said before—this is heaven to him.

when you’re done, you analyze his face as if he’s a sculpture. you trace your fingertips down the slope of his jaw; the high rise of his cheekbones, and over his lips for fun. he playfully tries to bite your finger before you swat at him.

the two of you brush your teeth, and you already know caleb will be bumping hips with you throughout the whole process. what should take two minutes turns into ten—with both you and caleb messing with each other by tickling, pinching, or hugging.

once you two are in bed, your face is pressed into caleb’s chest. he rests his chin on top of your head, and you feel his breaths coming down on you. when you look up at him with glowing, love-sick eyes, caleb presses kisses all over the top of your head.

you angle yourself up slightly, and caleb perks up eyebrow in suspicion. even in the dark, caleb can tell you’re smiling when you push yourself up and kiss him on the lips. it’s a deep kiss: one where you’re thanking him, trying to please him, and loving him all at once.

caleb is on you instantly, with one hand holding your face and the other cradling the small of your back. he puts all of the energy he has left into the kiss, before pulling away and slumping his head on the pillow like a love-starved dog.

“thank you. for today,” you murmur, inching yourself closer to him. “i appreciate everything you do for me,” you press one more kiss onto his lips before you fall into the hands of sleep, “i love you, caleb.”

oh yeah, caleb thinks, happy wife, happy life.

i wrote this in 30 mins can u tell

also idk what’s up w my borders im writing this on my phone so they’re a bit janky loll sorry

[tyrannosaurus-trainwreck]

Actually, I know damn well Darcy never sat down and thought about marrying Lizzie. If he had, it would have been a week before he was rounding up Bingley, sitting him down, and looking him in the eye like he was about to propose high treason and going, "Jane. You still down bad for her?"

Coin toss whether Bingley would actually get to answer before Darcy turned around and flipped over a whiteboard like

and launched right into the most detailed migration pattern known to Regency England to keep the extraneous Bennets as contained as humanly possible by rotating them between various Bingley/Darcy estates. Like, we're talking about trading them off for minor holidays a decade out kind of detailed.

"If you and Jane take them for Lady Day ten years hence, Elizabeth and I will take them for Michaelmas. We'll all be together for Christmas and Midsummer, so we'll divide the responsibility individually on those days."

This would be followed by thirteen different spreadsheets projecting joint expenditures so Bingley knows what sort of financial commitment he'll be shouldering and how to minimize it, what proportion Darcy will take care of, what the estate plans are in case Darcy predeceases anybody, when they should probably roll out various stages to keep it from affecting their respective sisters' ability to maximize their own husband-hunting--whole nine yards.

Darcy does not know that he'll probably be murdered when the Bingley sisters find out why he asked for their social calendars. He'd be marginally fine with that at this point, because the fucking Napoleonic War campaigns were not as meticulously planned as his roadmap to getting the other three Bennets satisfactorily married, and Darcy feels about as able as if he'd spent the last year on Elba.

It takes Bingley a few minutes to realize why this is happening, then he's like

"You proposed to Elizabeth?! Congratulations!"

Darcy... knew there was something he was forgetting.

That man would have kicked the Collins's door open with four binders tucked under each arm, dumped them in a pile in front of Elizabeth, and loudly announced that if they get married tomorrow he can have her entire family except for Jane extraordinary renditioned to the Scottish moors by Sunday and then been like

"Why are you yelling at me?! I promise you, it will work! You'll never see anyone in your family except for Jane again, I swear it!" when she starts yelling at him.

[technically-human]

He did eventually sign it

[siennasfantasies]

Part 2 (blurb)

Bakugou Katsuki started dating you in his first year of university. Now, three years have passed.

Mina, ever the observer, noticed slight changes in her friend’s demeanor.

"Kiri. Is Bakubro talking to someone?" She leaned against the windowsill of the lecture hall, carefully watching the blonde boy walk calmly off-campus.

"No. Why?" Kirishima slung his bag over his shoulder and walked over to where Mina stood. His eyes followed Bakugou as he walked away, starting to wonder.

Was Bakugou talking to someone? Nah, can't be.

"He seems... calmer?" Kirishima snickered, causing Mina to smile slightly. "Y’know what I mean. He's just, I don’t know, different now."

While the two of them came up with various scenarios, Katsuki himself had just reached his car and was texting you. A small notification pinged on his phone, and the boy smiled, pocketed it, and hopped into his car.

A few weeks later, during a small get-together with the group, Kaminari, drunkenly blurting out random thoughts, caught everyone's attention.

"Heyy, Bakus." Kaminari slung his arm around Bakugou's shoulders, leaning into him. "Come with me on this double date. This cute girl will only go out with me if you come for her friend."

Katsuki sighed at the sight of his childhood friend.

"I can’t."

Mina and Kirishima, sitting next to each other, lightly knocked knees, their ears perked up to catch the reason behind his refusal.

"Why not, Bakubro? It’s a free day. You busy?" Kirishima asked, taking a sip from his cup while keeping an eye on Bakugou, who looked bored.

Bakugou glanced at his phone, which buzzed with another notification. Mina quickly averted her gaze toward the screen, trying to catch a glimpse of the name—too slow to see anything.

Wait, what was that on his back-

"I have a date with my missus."

Bakugou continued texting, unaware of the sudden silence that had fallen over the entire group. All eyes were fixed on his relaxed figure as he typed away.

"YESSSSSSSSSS!" Mina jumped up, fists pumping the air in celebration. Her face lit up with pure joy as Kirishima chuckled beside her, shaking his head.

Katsuki looked up, confused by their reaction. Then he felt a small splatter on his forearm and turned to see Kaminari sitting next to him, his mouth open, spilling his drink.

"OY! Dunce face, you’re fucking spilling everything—"

"YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND??" Kaminari grabbed Bakugou's shoulders, lightly shaking him.

"Yeah, I thought I told you guys that."

Kaminari’s face fell, then he lunged forward and hugged Bakugou while sobbing, "You have a girlfriend!"

"Dunce—You're getting my shirt wet. Bro, get off!" Katsuki was shocked by the reaction of his friends. He glanced around at their expressions before his eyes landed on the entrance to the bar.

"Kaminari, off me." He grabbed his sobbing friend by the shoulder and gently tipped him back. "Move over. Make some space."

Mina whipped her head toward the entrance, gasping loudly.

And there you were, already smiling as you clutched your bag anxiously.

Bakugou stood up and walked over to you, a small smile tugging at his lips. Kirishima scoffed in shock as he heard him greet you.

"Hey, mama. You okay?"

You nodded, leaning forward to kiss his cheek. Katsuki wrapped his arm around your waist and led you toward the booth.

"Well, since I must have forgotten to mention it to you guys... meet my fiancée."

[duckysprouts]

if you were at your worst, if you’re a villain or a screwup or whatever, there is a goth man dressed as a giant bat who keeps coming after you, bothering you. he sabotages your journey of self destruction over and over. ur ready to give up but he won’t let you. you think, today he won’t come. today he will give up on me too. he never does.

[o0kawaii0o]

Newlyweds 💕

[beggars-opera]

Knitters have the sweater curse but they've got nothing on the guy I know who handcrafted a pair of completely authentic 18th century stays for his girlfriend, baleen and all, only to have it not last

[kimikaami]

The funniest thing about House MD to me is that all the shippers are right. House and Wilson really are just Like That. I'm so used to big ships being completely noncanon or distant subtext at best. Not Hilson. They have a fake dating episode. In the episode where House mocks a gay man for being in denial, the multi-episode-long subplot is about him trying to break up Wilson's relationship because he's jealous and wants him to himself. Wilson, his best friend and person whom he lives with. This show is insane.

[bananakeiky]

Emotional boyfriend fiancé

[str1wberry7thyme]

Ren turning to Martyn and asking him if they got married in third life when the bot quizzed them about it and Martyn saying “Well I did cut your head off” as if that’s their version of a wedding ceremony ohh god I hate them so much