#WHAT ? YOU MADE NO EFFORT ?????????? AND YOU INSULTED ME ??????????????? insane | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dadsbongos · 1 year

Text

then, and again, and once more

6.9k words

Summary - Yuuji tries to impress you and win your heart, with the help of Sukuna… who seems weirdly knowledgeable about and interested in you.

Warnings - p in v sex, FULL NELSON BABY!!!, yuuji eats pussy :), oh yeah fem reader btw, sukuna is here too (and his cannibalism is mentioned), idiot friends pining for each other, very vague timeline idk but yuuji is aged up

sukuna-centric part 2

There it is again.

Ba-dump. Ba-dump.

That unbearable thick bass in his chest, banging so tirelessly against his ribs that it threatens to make him nauseous. A quick inhale and yep - scratch that - he’s definitely already nauseous.

Yuuji sinks his sweaty palms deeper into his pants pockets, eyes darting sharply down to his beaten sneakers. The once vibrant ruby shade is now marred by dirt and aging threads - and if he turns his right foot just so, then he can see an old, blackened stain from pizza sauce he spilled while eating out with you. The memory, or more specifically how you’re giggling in his memory, makes him smile.

And in the real world, Megumi is watching his friend grin ear to ear while looking at a black, crusty splotch on the inside curve of his right shoe. After having just wide-eyed stared at you from across the room while you and Nobara heatedly debate where to go for dinner.

He glares at Yuuji, lashes narrowing, “You look insane. Knock it off.”

That snaps the boy from his reminiscing, and it takes him three long seconds before he registers the insult, “I was thinking!”

“Obviously,” Megumi scratches the side of his nose, more to just have something to do with his hands than anything else, “What were you thinking about?”

Humming quietly to himself, Yuuji shrugs, “Oh, the usual.”

“You’re hopeless,” Megumi maintains his efforts to keep his hands busy by scratching the back of his head, “Just tell her already. What’s the worst that happens?”

“She rejects me and avoids me,” Yuuji pouts, “Honestly, ‘gumi, I would’ve thought you’d be more sympathetic - being a standoffish and awkward guy yourself.”

Swatting at his friend’s shoulder, Megumi shakes his head, “The hell is wrong with you? Was that just sitting in your mind?” he shakes his head again, glare growing stronger, “And don’t call me that.”

“I thought you had anxiety or something,” Yuuji shrugs, “Why else would you be so weird in public?”

Any previous concern regarding Yuuji’s well-being immediately flies from Megumi at that. He folds his arms across his chest with murmurs of hatred floating out from his lips. All as he waltzes over to where you and Nobara are seated around your laptop at the chipping hardwood table.

Yuuji has no problem shrugging off Megumi's irritation, but when it comes to the mere idea of your face stretching in disgust at him - God, isn’t that the worst?

“You’re the worst, brat,” comes that rumbling, terrible voice in the back of his head. The nagging used to sound more like him - and when he’s really stressed, it still sometimes does - but now his own voice has faded into the King of Curses’. Now his own voice is sweeter, more prone to praise and positives - in a weird way, Sukuna has made Yuuji better.

But in a lot more ways -

“Oi, don’t ignore me.”

He’s made Yuuji’s life so much worse.

“You like that one, right? I can help.”

You’re sitting back, allowing Megumi to take the reins on shooting down Nobara’s suggestion for sushi. Normally, that demand isn’t a problem, but this would be the fifth night in a row she’s tried roping you all into ordering sushi for her. You lean into Megumi a little, and Yuuji hates the way his chest tightens at the display.

It isn’t even affection. It’s just…

“You want to be the one she’s on, right?”

Yuuji sighs to himself and sneaks out of the kitchen, though it’s hardly a challenge when Nobara raises her voice to defend her long-lasting cravings.

With tense shoulders and a red face, Yuuji glances down each side of the hall to ensure nobody is nearby, “How could you help with this?”

Sukuna’s eye on Yuuji’s cheek has flitted up to stare into Yuuji’s, and that sickly crawl of his skin stretching to accommodate Sukuna’s wide grin makes his stomach turn, “You’re just a child, you don’t know anything about women.”

Yuuji could double over, hands on his knees and breathless in sputters of laughter, but he refrains - unwilling to let anyone hear his schizophrenic ramblings, “And you do?”

Sukuna’s eye rolls and Yuuji hates the way it feels under his cheekbone, nearly retching in response, “Of course.”

And that strings up some different terrible question in Yuuji, “But why would you help me?”

Sukuna has been so unwilling to do anything useful for Yuuji despite the fact he’s allowed to reside in this body - so what could possibly possess him to do this now?

“Do you want my help or not, worm?”

Yuuji sighs through his nose, eyes fluttering shut, thinking hard about the offer. He’d come to the conclusion not too long after swallowing his first finger to simply not question many of Sukuna’s motives, mostly since his goals are: chaos, women, and chaos.

“This better not be some gross pass at my friend,” Yuuji sneers, body electrified on the ready to smack down his own cheek should he hear an answer he doesn’t like.

Sukuna is too quiet for too long, and Yuuji is fully prepared to swipe at the parasite on his face when finally, that deep voice rattles again. It buzzes in his flesh, uncomfortable and itchy and so quiet he barely hears what the curse mumbles into him.

The boy pauses and lets the words melt on his tongue, he turns them between his molars and laves the roof of his mouth with the remaining implications. He wasn’t expecting Sukuna to be honest, not to that degree at least.

And Yuuji smacks Sukuna’s bulbous eye down anyway.

“Fine then,” Yuuji pulls his hand down and curls his fingers into a fist, another great big awful ragged sigh roughing over his tongue like barbed wire, “I’ll listen to you, but if you ruin this for me- “

“Calm down, brat,” the mouth pops back up stubbornly, bitterly spitting out his version of a promise, “I don’t plan on failing.”

Yuuji pushes himself off the wall and spins back into the kitchen unnoticed, hands locking behind his head as he saddles up beside you at the table, “So, what’s for dinner?”

He snorts at how you groan, looking up at him from your seat with tired, low-lidded eyes and gesturing across the table to where Megumi and Nobara are still arguing, “You tell me.”

“Why don’t we just go out?” Yuuji shrugs, grinning broadly despite the way his two friends both twitch their necks over to glare at him, “Come on, it’s not even dark! We can walk around and do a little looking; get some air!”

Nobara’s pitched shoulders drop, pinched expression falling into her usual lax, she looks over at Megumi again with a raised brow. Megumi shrugs, his own eyebrows still scrunched together, “If it’s fine with you two, I don’t care.”

You snicker, standing up against the stiff wood supports of the chair legs, one elbow digging into the table to further help hold you up while your spare fingers dance up to smooth out the crinkled space, “I think it’ll be fun.”

Megumi snatches you by the wrist and tosses your hand to the side while Nobara hops down from her own chair, stretching out her back until it pops obnoxiously. She’s already bouncing out of the kitchen to snag her shoes before shouting back, “Well, come on! We’re on a timer now, people!”

“Jeez,” you slip off the chair pegs, bumping slightly into Yuuji’s side - entirely oblivious to the sparkly fireworks you sweep across your poor friend’s body at the contact, “Should’ve just suggested that from the start, huh?”

Shrugging, Yuuji waits for you to begin walking out of the kitchen before following, “Sometimes you just need fresh eyes on a situation, you know?”

“I guess,” you fold your arms, evidently frustrated, “Just feel like that was something I should’ve seen.”

Yuuji feels that disgusting, familiar thumping in his chest just by looking at you now. Heat radiating from his cheeks to the expanse of his chest, throat swelling with the uncomfortable need to spill his guts - dump every little thought and feeling he’s ever had for you into your ears until you force him to shut up. Like how he can’t even look at Jennifer Lawrence the way he used to simply because she isn’t you.

Maybe then he’d tell you that this hasn’t happened in the six years since he first saw Silver Linings Playbook. Maybe you’d tell him to stop talking, and that you two would never happen.

Maybe then he can move on, when you crush his hope. But he doesn’t really want that.

And he doesn’t really know why he agreed to let Sukuna lend him any advice.

Oh well.

It’s when you’re rushing out the door to keep up with Megumi and Nobara that Sukuna opens his mouth for the first time.

His voice stabs into Yuuji’s ears, but it isn’t exceptionally as cruel as he usually finds it, this, instead, is purely instructional, “When you two are out tonight, tell her about that cat you saw around the garden today.”

Yuuji scratches through his messily filed memories, “I saw a cat?”

“Yes, twit, a black one. Tell her about how its fur changed color in the sun.”

“Okay…?” Yuuji huffs in his daze, finally putting effort into walking alongside you and the others, “Hey! So, I just remembered something.”

“Oh yeah?” you smile at Yuuji, purely encouraging, and he’s disgusted at the way he almost trips over his own feet.

Nobara and Megumi pay the both of you little mind, instead pointing out different potential favorite hotspots they could creep into for the night. Well, Nobara points out, they could even stop at two places if they’re feeling adventurous. And Megumi says they can do whatever the rest of you think is best.

But Yuuji isn’t listening, and you’re hardly lending an ear, he swallows down the rock in his throat and nods, “I saw a cat this morning - a black one! - and it made me think of you,” the gentle warmth spreading through him could either be the way you’re lighting up at him, or Sukuna silently congratulating his good line, “Its fur was all brownish red in the sun, it was…” your eyes are so starry and sweet, solely on him - it makes his tongue tie up in knots, “It was beautiful.”

“Bummer I wasn’t there, then,” you pout a little, “You need to get me for things like that!” he laughs at the way your face has morphed, all stern and strict business, “Seriously!”

“Okay, okay,” he surrenders, both hands up in playful defense, “I promise to call you if I see another cat.”

“Could’ve at least taken a picture for me,” you histrionically sigh, “And I thought we were friends.”

A sudden thought invades the back of Yuuji’s mind. Some hidden, more primal part of his mind that he doesn’t usually listen to flashes back to a time he doesn’t remember.

We used to be more.

You and him are sitting out in the sun with a fluffy little Bombay cat tucked into your lap. It paws at the buttery dandelions that bloom between you both, his own legs are sprawled out impolitely and your own are crossed to wall around the feline in your hold. His knee knocks against yours whenever he shifts his leg. You lean in, shoulder digging into the meat of his muscled arm and temple resting on his shoulder.

Your body is entirely at ease. His is, too.

Yuuji knows exactly where the thought comes from. And if that dark, creepy place weren’t so infested by evil then maybe he’d feel a little pity for it. But you’re in front of him now, and you’re excited to be here, and your pinky keeps knocking into his as you two walk side-by-side - so there’s no room for pity in his heart.

Your quartet winds up squished into a teal leather booth towards a back corner of Nobara’s selected diner. You and Nobara sit on the interior seats, pressed into the windows, with Yuuji and Megumi caging the both of you in. Megumi having shoved Yuuji down next to you before the boy could even see who was where.

“What were you thinking?” Nobara sits up, jabbing your arm with a manicured finger just to annoy you.

Flicking at her hand, you shrug, focusing on the boards plastered behind the front bar counter for any eye-catching special offers.

Yuuji can feel the tightening of his cheek skin as the eyeball threatens to pop out, it stings when his cheek is forced to split for Sukuna’s eye. His cheek below that parts as well for his lips.

And Sukuna is kind enough this once to be quiet, “Tell her to get the wildfowl bowl,” as if sensing his arising questions, Sukuna continues, “And tell the kitchen worms to make sure the vegetables are soft. Not well, not sturdy,” he sounds disgusted as he says it, “Soft.”

“Hey,” and against everything he’s been told by Gojo, Yuuji puts his entire trust into the curse inside him, “that wildfowl bowl looks good, right?”

You lean closer to Yuuji, arm brushing his as you try to see where he spotted that, “What’s in it? Duck?”

He gives a conformational hum even though he has no idea, “Probably good with soft vegetables.”

Megumi shakes his head, “What does that even mean?”

“When they steam the veggies for longer than usual,” you pat Yuuji’s shoulder while defending him, “I get what you mean, Itadori. Sorry Fushiguro is so judgemental.”

“I was just saying…” Megumi’s voice flutters out of Yuuji’s focus.

Instead, another memory he never made begins to flourish from that black, mushy, rotted back of his brain.

You’re sat in his lap, large thighs perfectly bracketing around your own. A neglected bowl of slim slivers of perfectly browned duck meat sits atop cooling rice, carrots, and green beans. No doubt soft and easy to chew. In your hands is a steaming bowl, larger than the one in your lap, weighed down by thick cuts of juicy meat slabs. Almost like steak, but there’s no outer hide tanned by flame. It’s red, almost raw, and even after trimming the fat - it’s still bathed in pink, fleshy trails.

Grinning so lovingly, you pinch the slabs with your bare fingers and merely giggle when Sukuna’s sharp teeth prick at your skin. His long tongue works to clean your fingers of the excess meat juices as he eats. Two of his hands are on your hips, holding you steady, a third is steadied beside him against the cold bone of his throne, and a fourth resides at the back of your head. Almost big enough to palm the whole of your skull like a children’s ball - he pats and pets and smooths his fingers over the slope of the back of your neck.

Preening under gentle attention, you’re sure to empty Sukuna’s bowl before picking your own back up.

People watch with blood at their feet, none dare to move. Fearful to become the next hot meal in your hand should they disobey Sukuna’s silent command.

As your hands wrap around your cold bowl, a deep grunt reverberates behind you in Sukuna’s broad chest. He tugs the dish from your grasp; plucks the duck meat between his forefinger and thumb and holds it above your nose, forcing you to look up.

He waves it in front of your face, “Open,” and you follow his order, lips parting yet still pitched up in the impression of a pleased smile. And when he flattens the meat to your tongue and you begin chewing - you’re still smiling. That earns another fond stroke down the back of your head, pausing at your shoulder and digging his thumb into the muscle just to hear you sigh, “Good girl.”

Yuuji doesn’t see all of that. He can grasp some vague sense that you two have shared meals he’ll never get to taste, but he never sees the gristle left behind on your fingers or the saliva webbed between your fingers after feeding Sukuna.

That - Sukuna ‘hmph's proudly as he watches you beam at Yuuji over your modern interpretation of your favorite meal - the King of Curses keeps to himself. Selfishly, just as he always has.

That next morning, you sheepishly prattle into the dusty, creaky classroom with only four rusty, barely used desks and slip into the one by Yuuji. You’re toying with the tips of your hair, eyes bouncing from where Yuuji sits on the desktop beside you and the classroom door.

Nobara sits backward at the desk directly in front of you, arms coiled around the back support of her chair as she speaks and Megumi sits normally beside her - attention solely on his book. Yuuji watches you fiddle with the ends of your hair while pretending to listen to Nobara.

And then he sees it. The new cherry shade decorating your lips, and before Sukuna can sprout and tell him to - Yuuji’s leaning down with his best smile, “New lipstick?”

Jumping at the sudden voice, your rigid posture melts under the boy’s gaze, “Yes, actually. You like?”

It could be puke green and Yuuji would still want it smeared across his face from your kisses.

But despite housing Sukuna Ryomen and battling dreadful curses, Yuuji fails to muster the courage to say that to your face, “Yeah! It’s really pretty.”

Ba-dump. Ba-dump.

There goes your annoying heart, hammering just from the sound of Yuuji’s overtly positive lilt. It makes your cheeks burn and fingers skittishly tip-tap against the pencil-scratched desk, “You think so?”

But he’d never lie, you know that.

So even though it shouldn’t be a surprise when he doubles down, your annoying heart won’t stop dramatically tossing itself around when Yuuji nods with a determined, boyish grin, “Definitely.”

It’s all so saccharine and perfect, it makes Sukuna nauseous. Which, in turn, makes Yuuji nauseous.

Face paling, Yuuji jumps onto his feet and excuses himself, rushing out of the room (with no Gojo even in sight, by the way) towards the bathroom.

“Is he okay?” Nobara murmurs, stretching her neck to see outside the door frame, “What a weirdo.”

“Yeah,” you sigh dreamily, “He is sometimes, huh?”

Megumi gags at your tone, “Seriously…?”

“What was that?” Yuuji’s question is spikey and venomous while he stares into the cracked, water-spotted mirror - straight at the little eyeball on his cheek.

“You two are disgusting,” Sukuna stares back into the glass, low-lidded and unimpressed, “Get this over with and ask her out, brat.”

“But what if she says no?” Yuuji reaches up and toys with the little pink hairs at the back of his head, eyes suddenly unable to meet Sukuna at all, “It’ll totally ruin everything.”

“Enough whining. She won’t say no.”

He doesn’t know how it took so long to recognize, or maybe he just needed an excuse to display his old, unbroken knowledge of you before your fleshly little weakling friends even knew it. But he’s seen the little bursts of color and stars and sparkles and all that cute mess before.

He’s seen it many times. It was the only way you used to look at Sukuna.

That puppyish, lovesick wonder as you fluttered your pretty eyelashes at him.

Even when he would return to you in blood and sweat and muck and smelling of the death and despair he expertly wrought.

You were always at least five paces ahead of Uraume, hands bunching up in the pretty flowing silks that decorated your body. Excitedly, you’d pounce and he would hold you. Sapping up your energy and feeding off the way you’d press cherry-tasting kisses all along his hardened face. You served yourself up to him on a silver platter, all your heart and soul and mind devoted entirely and without ulterior motives. That’s why you were always his favorite.

Nothing before or after you was ever up to par. And he felt disgruntled at every turn into different worshippers and concubines and lovers - somehow wronged simply by the fact they were not as you were. It was all so disappointing.

And every now and again he’d flash back to you while with others. He imagines it’s how children feel when they remember a lost or broken or tossed-out favorite toy. That ache of times lost and never feeling quite fulfilled again.

Which is why when he saw you again through this brat’s eyes, he could instantly remember those nights with you. Full-bellied and raw-lipped and your pulse between his teeth.

But Yuuji knows nothing of that, and so when he returns to the classroom - neither of you says anything.

It’s only the two of you. Everyone else was cast out in the violent, unwilling acceptance that they had done all they could. With no open wound, there was a horrific list rattled off in Sukuna’s ears. Illnesses and infections that attacked the lungs and nervous system and skin and heart - things that would eat you alive from the inside. And when all could be done about that, you remained in bed.

In and out of consciousness and delusional, proclaiming twisted lights and shadowy creatures trying to rip you from yourself.

Perhaps, one of the women called to care for you shyly spoke up, perhaps she’s just too old.

And that was something he avoided admitting to himself.

But it was time now.

With dew still moist on the blades of grass and morning sunlight streaming through the window beside your bed - the bell tolls. Your fingers are stiff in the sheets, limbs cold and stiff when you’re found. Wide, puppylike eyes gaze up at the ceiling and Sukuna has you buried beneath the tallest, most twisted tree he could find in the surrounding forest. And when Sukuna returns from your grave that night - alone - he crosses into a dark tunnel.

It’s cold and solid beneath his feet, paces echoing back for his ears. He keeps his eyes down to avoid maddening himself over the plainness - the displeasure of even glimpsing this tunnel’s repetitive nature.

Until there’s light, golden, with the shrouded, clumsy shape of twisted branches and lanky trunks coming into view at the far open end.

And faintly, like the sweet singing of a beloved music box, he hears the tune of your voice. A high scoop towards the end.

“Itadori, right?”

Sukuna’s feet move faster before he even fully knows he’s moving.

On the other side is you, a hand jammed out in front of you in a polite wave - as if the both of you are strangers. Then that name creeps back up his spine.

Well, it’s not truly his spine, is it? It’s this new brat’s.

But then there’s your honeyed voice again, “Huh, third eye.”

Right. You wouldn’t remember it, would you?

You wouldn’t remember any of it.

Yuuji shoots up, dark sheets tangled around his ankles and cold sweat beading down his forehead - strings of pink hair matted down to his skin uncomfortably. His wide eyes scramble across the shadows of his room, slowly refamiliarizing himself with the expanse and soothing his pounding heart.

He smoothes back his hair, running through the small kinks and knots, “What the hell was that?”

That slicing pain along his cheek shocks him awake further, but no sore, deep voice follows. The eye sits there, downcast. Sitting inside this body is one of the last things he saw for himself, but to exist beside you again is liquid gold just flowing in a river. A river his new body refuses to swim in.

“She’s still awake.”

Yuuji looks over to the red numbers lighting up from his bedside alarm clock, “It’s midnight.”

Sukuna inhales sharply, irritation scorching a hole in his tongue, but he withholds the many sudden hateful thoughts he has towards Yuuji and simply repeats himself, “She’s still awake.”

“It’s weird how obsessed you are with this,” Yuuji swings his legs over the edge of his bed and slips his feet into the slippers you’d gifted him. They’re cheesy and themed after fire engines and just barely fit, but he wears them at any given opportunity.

The eye sinks back into his skin, lips sealing shut, and a thick sludge boils in Yuuji’s stomach. Quiet King of Curses is an unsettling King of Curses, and Yuuji barely finds himself able to tune out the exhaustive wave of Sukuna’s criticisms. That is much preferred to this buzzing silence.

Creeping down the moaning wooden panels to your room, Yuuji raps his knuckles against your door before immediately shuffling his fists into his gray sweatpants.

Something clatters against hardwood, sheets ruffle, and your footsteps thump, thump, thump up to your bedroom door. Your face peeks out from the sliver of cracked doorway, and there’s no hint of sleep in your gaze. You seem alert, if a little lazily slouched against your doorframe.

“Itadori?”

Oh, right. He was here to say something, wasn’t he?

But he can’t possibly find the strength in his tongue, not when you look at him like that.

With some impossible adoration, like you simply can’t wait to hear whatever stupid bullshit he’s about to spout. He feels so unworthy of it all, and he can’t wait to find out more about you and mold himself to it. To become someone you can’t imagine waking up without. To study and be studied, he’s ready to throw himself into the horrors of being known - if it’s you he’s known by.

The air is punched out of him as he speaks, “Can…” you nod him along, opening your door wider, “Can I kiss you?”

Now that he’s so close to the sugary river, he can’t wait to dive in.

“Seriously?” you laugh in shock at the outburst, but when his face persists, you fling the door open entirely, “Seriously?”

Yuuji winds his hands tighter, to stop himself from desperately clawing his way down your throat, “I like you. I’ve liked you…” he’s unnatural like this, red in the face and dodging your stare, “I don’t even know.”

But you do, you felt it when you first saw him. However, you’re not plagued by the chains of past lives, so the implications are lost. Winding your arms behind your back and grinning at Yuuji with toothy glee, “Me too.”

His eyes nail you with that doughy, desperate plea for attention - the need to be seen as himself. And you’ve always been glad to lend it over in plentiful bounties.

That buzz of silence stabs the both of you.

Until Yuuji can no longer tether himself to his pockets, his big hands gentle as he cups both your cheeks. He molds himself to you, hoping that those troublesome flashes of times he never lived will at least serve his muscle memory now.

Your hands twist into the front of Yuuji’s shirt, nails biting into the black, soft, loose fabric and tugging him closer. Yuuji’s lips are slightly chapped, and you can feel the imprints from where he’s bitten them raw. He hisses when you peek your tongue at the smooth spots.

Wrenching your hands back, you quickly run them under and up his sleep shirt - his skin is warm and he gasps against your lips when your fingertips skim along his sides.

Yuuji pulls back, cheeks flaming, and shoulders his way past your bedroom door, kicking it shut behind him and placing his hands over his shirt - finding yours through the material. He grins, chuckling at how you grope his muscle, squeezing around your hands, “Enjoying yourself?”

“Whatever,” you huff, embarrassed, then ripping your hands out from under his shirt and twisting your fingers between his before - just to prove a point - planting his palms below your own shirt, “You try being normal like this.”

Yuuji’s broad palms are still only burning into the soft flesh of your stomach, but his heart is terribly out of whack.

Ba-dump. Ba-dump.

“You can go higher,” your voice lilts higher, a mere soft whisper as if anything louder could entirely break the poor boy’s brain, “If you want…”

Of course, he does. He’d trade a thousand years with that Sisyphus guy Megumi mentioned to him just for twelve seconds of his hands sizzling up your body. Maybe even just for the chance.

His hands scope higher, palms glued to the planes of your body like he’s trying to scar himself along your skin. The sudden need to leave some lasting impression that he was there - here with you.

Yuuji does his best not to jump when Sukuna’s voice slithers into his ear, polite enough to whisper so he doesn’t alarm you, “Get her on her back. Tongue her cunt.”

You look at him all sweet and concerned when Yuuji’s nose scrunches, “Are you okay? Is something wrong?”

But he has no idea how to tell you that Sukuna’s words make his stomach churn, and by the time he even tries to form the words he’s thinking about it. Imagining himself on his stomach with his head between your thighs, your hands tangled in his hair, and eagerly trying to annoy your friends as much as possible with how loud he can make you. And he feels so, so lightheaded at that.

Yuuji’s eyes are wide, staring into yours with such fire that it almost makes you shy away, “Can I eat you out?”

But you brave his dissecting gaze, heart pounding in your ears.

Ba-dump. Ba-dump.

And, oh, Yuuji could just about die happy right now.

On his stomach with his head between your thighs, your hands screwed into the twirls of his tousled hair and (hopefully) annoying at least a nosy Nobara should she be listening to your soft moans next door.

Yuuji wiggles his tongue into your weeping hole, nestling his nose against your clit with a wheezy little whine. His eyes flutter up at you through the gaps between your shaking arms.

“Get your hands in there,” Sukuna’s voice is muffled against the thickness of your thigh, “Thumb her clit, don’t rely on your nose.”

Crinkling his brows, Yuuji has to bite back his remarks about how Sukuna could’ve told him that sooner. Snaking his right hand over your leg, Yuuji flattens his large hand against your lower stomach and pins your bucking hips. His thumb taking residence on your swollen clit, the bridge of his nose still saddled beneath it.

Your back arches, hips grinding down into Yuuji’s thumb and tongue. He’s messy with it - head shaking just to tease and feel the wetness of your pussy slip and slather across his chin. He tongue-fucks you in earnest, practically moaning into you as he grinds against the mattress. Swishing his thumb against your clit faster when he can feel you tighten around him, chasing the feeling of you cumming all over his face.

He can hear it despite his desperation - the way your breath hitches and throat cinches out a squeal. Your thighs squish around his head and Yuuji has to force his hips still lest he be submitted to the horrors of cumming in his pants.

And it isn’t even the fear of your reaction - no, he knows better than to think you’re capable of making him feel shame. It’s just-

“Yes,” Sukuna’s voice is husky, tongue lolling out along Yuuji’s cheek to lather up your juice, “Yes!”

Yuuji knows exactly who will be making fun of him instead. He smacks at the unwanted presence and takes it as pure luck when Sukuna actually stays down.

He works his tongue out of you slowly, letting you whine and huff the way off your high naturally before peeking up at you. He’s grinning, eyes wide and hands retreating to dig hungrily into the meat of your thighs.

“Hey, I wanna try something,” Yuuji’s shamelessness in licking at his soaked lips makes heat flush all the way to your forehead, “Just let me know if it’s too much, okay?”

You nod sheepishly, body jittery with the little bugs crawling beneath your sweltering skin. Yuuji bends to the sudden thought he’s sure has something to do with the curse inside him with a mysterious catalog on all things you.

Yuuji slips onto his back beside you, curled against the cold wall corning your bed with his feet flat against the mattress and legs bent. He uses the unnatural well of strength he’s harbored since birth to squeeze at the fat of your sides and lift you atop of him. He can feel the warmth of your cunt on his pelvis and it wracks him with a shiver, you whine helplessly when his right hand immediately welds to your slit. His index and ring fingers part your lips so his middle can swipe coyly over your clit.

“Hah,” you watch his ring finger abandon its post to join the rude teasing, “Yuuji…”

“I know,” Yuuji sucks his bottom lip between his teeth, eyes glued to where your wetness drips onto his skin, his hard cock peeking up between your legs, “I know, I’m sorry,” but he doesn’t sound very sorry. Especially when he’s continuing to tease you while pressing a kiss to your cheek, “Okay, serious now,” but he dips his fingers lower and prods at your hole, “Serious.”

You giggle, hot-faced, at his focused gaze, “Yuuji!”

“Sorry, sorry, sorry,” he spreads your lips again just to stare from over your shoulder, voice hoars when he finally speaks up, “Alright. Serious now.”

Reaching between your legs, Yuuji grabs hold of his cock - hissing at the contact - and is internally grateful when you raise your hips to meet his head. He presses his forehead against your shoulder when his tip pushes inside you. You feel the hot puffs of air he sends against your back as you continue lowering yourself. He whimpers, the hand at his base flying across your abdomen and gripping your breast. He squeezes and pinches and tries suffocating the embarrassing little noises escaping his lips when you rock your hips down on his pelvis.

“Okay down there?” you twist your head to look back at Yuuji and you’re so glad you did.

He’s flushed down to his chest and his lashes are kissing his cheeks to keep himself together, when he finally opens his eyes fully and looks up at you. His bottom lip is red and puffy from how hard he’d been biting it, “Now I’m gonna do something new.”

This wasn’t new?

Yuuji’s arms stretch under the backs of your knees and come over your shoulders before winding behind your neck, pressing his palms flat against the back of your head. Your arms dangle uselessly at your sides, hands stretching out to graze his ribs and legs bouncing limply as he manhandles you.

His cock bullies itself in your cunt, hips jerking up into the fat of your ass.

Yuuji tries to suffocate down his groans in favor of your sweet moans being punched up from your gut every time he sweeps deep inside you. His lips press tightly just as your own pop open for adorable “ah, ah ah!”s - fighting to maintain his pace despite how badly he wants to pin you to his body and wallow through the wetness sucking him back in for every thrust. Feel your sweaty skin slide and stick against his and whine at the pulling sensation when you peel apart.

Another sudden idea pops into his brain and it’s almost instinctual how he follows it. Besides, it isn’t like he’s going to complain about being brain-blasted with memories that aren’t his if it means not having to hear Sukuna’s voice while fucking you.

Hips never falter in their snaps up into you, Yuuji cranes his neck to teeth at the meat of your nape. He bites possessively and grunts in response to your immediate pitchy moan. Then licking over the marks apologetically.

You try to smother down your breathless moans as Yuuji bullies his cock repeatedly into that spongy spot shooting stars behind your eyes. With an angle and drive and care you’re sure would be lost on any man other than Yuuji - and you’re dumbly struck by the hope that maybe this hard work is only because he’s here with you. And that coherent thought is fucked out of you with Yuuji’s next whimpered request.

“Don’t do that,” he gasps when you tighten around him after a particularly rough thrust, “Please don’t keep it down- wanna…” he moans and the sound flutters straight to your tightening gut, “Wanna hear you so bad, pretty girl.”

Unlatching your teeth from the plush of your bottom lip, flames lap through the wiry twists of your veins - burning through the stretch of your skin and scarring Yuuji. And he eats it up and greedily begs at your feet for more. It shames Sukuna just as much as it excites him to taste the salt on your skin through his vessel’s tongue and watch the way your legs shake and bounce under his vessel’s iron hold. His favorite way to have you and your favorite way to take him.

Yuuji unwinds one of his arms from behind your neck, lowering half your body slightly to swipe his fingers between the junction of your thighs. Right over the slippery spot where you’re creaming on his cock and taking the soaked fingers to your clit. His canines and soft lips battle for a monopoly of your neck and shoulder, swiftly circling your clit with his middle and ring fingers as his hips continue fucking you stubbornly.

“Hng, Yuu…!” you gasp, head throwing back and narrowly missing his - the coil winding tighter and tighter and your walls milking Yuuji tighter and tighter, “Yuuji!”

“I know, baby,” he kisses up your bent neck and presses his flaming cheek against yours, “God, please, cum for me. Cum for me,” his hips stutter, and his breath hitches and oh, he’s so close, “I wanna feel you cum on me, baby- I need it. Need it so bad.”

“Oh, Yuuji,” you dig your face closer to his as if trying to meld yourselves into one body, “‘m cumming,” you clench and he’s damn near wheezing, the knot in his lower belly popping as he feels you cum and drips down his balls, “‘m cumming, I’m cumming, I’m cumming…!”

And just to avoid embarrassing himself from admitting he’s in love with you while spitting his own cum in your warm, wet walls, Yuuji strangles down his own final cries with a coppery, abusive bite to his bottom lip.

It starts to hurt, how he overstimulates himself through his slowing thrusts - letting you slip down onto his thrumming, sticky chest. Your legs sprawled across his sides, Yuuji slipping his softening cock from your hole.

You lazily roll off of Yuuji, landing face-first into your sheets at his side.

Yuuji can hear it again, that terrible, grating voice telling him, “Clean her, brat.”

And what’s the most terrible is he knows Sukuna’s command is entirely warranted. Flopping a hand onto your back, Yuuji traces heart shapes into the skin as he talks, “I’ll be right back.”

And when Yuuji’s wetting a soft, clean cloth he braved the hallway (nude) to retrieve from his room, he hears that voice again. It echoes in your bathroom.

“I want a turn when she’s awake,” a pause, “Fully awake.”

“Aren’t you charitable?” Yuuji rolls his eyes.

And that same utterance from hours before rings through Yuuji’s ears once again. Why Sukuna cared so much about petty crushes. Why Sukuna bothered himself by actually giving genuine, helpful points. Why Sukuna was fascinated by you.

“She was my most devoted and favorite lover in her past life.”

The way he says it inspires no respect for Yuuji - underlined in his thriving desire to be worshiped, as he imagines he deserves. Yuuji wouldn’t dare uphold you to that.

When he tenderly presses his thumbs into stiff muscles with a red flush and warm smile, Yuuji knows that for sure.

“Can I stay the night?” he whispers, folding his discarded towels and lazily tucking them by your bedpost on the floor. He feels that same hurried ache in his chest, awaiting for your impatience.

Ba-dump. Ba-dump.

You hum, lifting your head off the pillow and snickering, your drowsy face pinched to look at him like he’s stupid, “Duh.”

Giddy, Yuuji slips under the blankets he’d slid over you after cleaning the mess from between your thighs, and slots himself right next to you.

Rolling again, you twist into an open space against Yuuji’s chest and under his thick arm. Warmth drapes across your shoulders when he rests that arm over you. He circles his other arm around you and squeezes, grinning so hard he can feel it burning in the balls of his cheeks. Your ear rests against Yuuji’s chest, and you soothe yourself to slumber on the rhythm of his heartbeat.

Ba-dump. Ba-dump.

Blissfully unaware of the fact that when your bones are rotten and six feet deep, two more people will be curled into each other’s arms. With your same starry eyes that some pink-haired kid falls in love with every time they’re on him.

#jjk x reader #jjk smut #yuuji x reader #yuuji smut #yuuji fluff #yuji x reader #yuji itadori #yuji itadori x reader #yuji itadori smut #yuji itadori fluff #and sukuna too i guess

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writerslittlelibrary · 6 months

Text

I'll protect you, princess au

masterlist

summary: you're the princess of the most important kingdom in the world. every illegal organisation in existence has it out for you, and after a particularly dangerous situation, that almost ended in your death, your parents have decided to give you a personal guard to protect you. what happens when this knight messes with every rule you've ever known?

pairing: knight Abby Anderson x princess reader

warnings: at one point it’s mentioned that being gay is forbidden (does that need a warning lol???)

genre: fluff, forbidden love

words: 1634

a/n: I'm not even gonna pretend that I don't fantasise at night about me being a princess, and sneaking around with knight!Abby. could you even imagine?! Abby is literally a perfect knight. she's sweet and protective and strong and god I'm experiencing gay panic

I'm imagining this to be set in a more mediaeval world, like once upon a time :)

You do not have my permission to repost, copy or translate my work

|——————————— ⴵ ———————————|

Your father had always been a cautious man. Being the most powerful Royal family in the world came with its risks, and after you almost got killed last year, he had assigned you with a personal guard.

You were a bit sceptical at first, yet your father assured you she was the best trained person in the entire country. With her protecting you, nothing could happen. She was strong, and she was well trained to be able to tell whether people were sketchy or not from a mile away.

You still weren't sure, but you were quick to change your mind when you finally met her.

She was insanely attractive. She looked super strong, but when she went to introduce herself to you, she had the sweetest smile you had ever seen. She was polite, and yet she looked like she could lift you up and throw you down a cliff. To say she didn't make you feel things would be a lie.

She had been by your side for a few months now, and you couldn't deny how nice it was to be able to go out into the world without having to worry about people harassing you.

Abby was always there, no matter what you did.

Whether you went horse riding, or decided to have a little picnic by the lake, Abby would join you, and she would either keep you company, or stand at a safe distance. Whichever you preferred at the moment.

Today was one of the days that you felt like going out for a ride. The weather was great, and after the heavy rainfall you had been experiencing for the past couple days, you were craving some nice spring sunshine.

“Are you almost ready, milady?” Abby asked after knocking and opening your door.

“I'm nearly finished,” you replied, pulling your boots on and making your way towards the door. “Will Arthur be joining us today?” you asked Abby. You were oblivious to the face she made. You figured she simply did not like Arthur, but to Abby it was so much more than that.

Arthur had been the guy your parents had been pushing you towards.

You were growing up, and it was time for you to try and find a husband. Arthur was a prince who came from your neighbouring kingdom. His family was rich, and his people were pleased. His family was well respected, and because of this fact, your parents were greatly interested in a union. You, however, made no effort to show interest in Arthur, and so, your parents had decided to invite him over to your kingdom, to hopefully create a spark between you two.

It was safe to say that Arthur was head over heels for you, but you could not say the same.

He was kind, sure, but he was too sure of himself. He was convinced that every girl in the kingdom was obsessed with him, and that he was the greatest prince that the kingdom had ever seen.

Every time he made a comment about his greatness, you tried to kindly explain to him that what he was saying was probably not true. However, Abby was less kind, and every time Arthur made a comment that insulted either you, or any other girl, she was quick to shut him up.

Arthur didn't like Abby, and Abby didn't like Arthur.

“I believe I heard him say he's not very fond of horseback riding, ma'am,” Abby explained, knowing full well that she never made an effort to ask him.

You let out a sigh of relief. “That's a shame,” you said, trying, and failing, to hide your satisfaction.

“Shall we go then?” you asked Abby, who nodded and stepped aside, allowing you to exit your room and walk ahead as you made your way to the stables.

Abby walked behind you, exactly three steps, like she always did. She wasn't too close, neither was she too far. You liked it that way, unaware of the fact that Abby liked it just as much. She felt at ease, knowing she was the one protecting you.

When you arrived at the stables, your horses were already prepared. You thanked the stable boy and took the reins of your horse, waiting for Abby to copy your actions.

She did, and together you walked outside.

“Where should we go today, princess?” Abby asked, getting onto her own horse after you had gotten onto yours. You simply shrugged in reply, looking out into the forest.

“I'm not too certain. We could, perhaps, just ride around, and see where we end up?” you suggested, looking at Abby for approval. She smiled.

“Of course, princess. That is a wonderful idea.”

After riding around for a few hours, you ended up at a beautiful lake. The sun reflected off the water beautifully, and the grass field around the lake was breathtaking. You stopped there, getting off of your horse and tying it to a tree.

Abby copied your actions, tying her own horse to the tree before following you towards the water.

“What’s on your mind, princess?” Abby asked while she gave your side a slight nudge.

You sighed, looking over the water to take a moment to collect your thoughts.

“What do you think about Arthur?” you then asked Abby, who sighed and looked away from you, thinking about how to say what she wanted to say, without sounding too rude.

“I think his family is rich, and that he is the textbook definition of the perfect prince,” Abby said, turning back to look at you again. “Why do you ask?”

You sighed, turning to face Abby as well.

“I don’t think I want to marry him, but I don’t want to disappoint my parents. They appear to really like Arthur, and he seems kind enough, but he’s so full of himself. Besides that, I just don’t…” you stopped yourself, nearly spilling your deepest secret.

Abby quirked her eyebrow, looking at you with much interest now.

“You don’t… what?” she asked.

You sighed again, turning your head away from Abby.

“I am not attracted to him,” you said, hoping to satisfy Abby with your answer. Of course, she knew that that wasn’t what you were going to say.

“Not attracted to him, or to guys in general?” Abby subtly questioned, patiently waiting for your answer.

You gasped, turning to Abby like she had just spoken of the devil.

“Abby! How dare you suggest such a thing. You know that is forbidden,” you corrected her, to which Abby just smiled kindly at you.

“It is just us two here. I promise you that whatever you tell me, I shall not tell another soul,” Abby promised, reaching for your hand and rubbing circles at the back of it.

You sighed softly, gathering your courage before speaking again.

“Do you think it is wrong? To be attracted to the same gender, I mean,” you asked Abby, looking at her with questioning eyes. Abby simply shook her head.

“I don’t. Do you?”

You sighed once more, before nodding slightly.

“I am not certain. I cannot deny these feelings I have. But I cannot let it hinder me from becoming the queen my people need. One day, I will have to make an heir. I will become queen, and I will need to have children. That’s just the way it is,” you explained.

Abby smiled at you.

“You know, when you are the queen, you get to decide that. You could make new laws, that would state that the next heir, wouldn’t have to be your bloodline. You could give someone else a rightful claim to the throne,” Abby suggested, and after thinking about it for a little while, you turned to her, nodding.

“In that case, I do prefer girls. I wish I could tell the one that I like…” you confessed, and Abby smiled.

“You’re secret is safe with me, princess. And if we’re being honest here, I do prefer girls as well,” Abby confessed, chuckling at the way you head whipped around.

“You do?!” you asked in surprise, and Abby nodded.

“In fact, there happens to be a girl I like as well,” Abby told you, smiling at the hint of disappointment that flashed over your face.

“You know, I think she likes me too,” Abby then continued, waiting to see your reaction.

“Will you tell her? Will she accept it?” you asked Abby.

“That depends. May I kiss you, princess?” Abby then asked, placing her fingers under your chin to get you to face her.

You’re cheeks flushed to a bright red, but yet you still nodded, biting you lip while staring into Abby’s eyes, waiting for her next move.

Slowly, Abby leaned down, capturing your lips in a soft, passionate kiss. After she pulled away, she smiled sweetly at you.

“And? Do you think she’ll accept it?” Abby asked you, smiling when you nodded excitedly.

“I think she’ll be delighted to know you like her,” you responded, giggling when Abby gave you a small kiss on your cheek.

“We should go back to the castle. Your parents will start wondering where you are,” Abby then said. You looked around, noticing that the sun had already started setting. Your dinner would be prepared soon, and you knew how much your parents disliked you being late for dinner.

“Do you think we’ll be able to share a moment like this again…?” you asked Abby carefully after you walked towards your horse, mounting it.

“Don’t worry, princess. There will be plenty of moments like this,” Abby assured you, climbing onto her own horse and following the way home.

Maybe you feelings weren’t that scandalous at all. Maybe Abby was right. Perhaps you could bend the rules, should you become queen soon…

(Wouldn’t it be cute to make a part 2, with queen reader and Abby who find Lev, and assign him as the next heir 🫣)

Permanent tags: @marvelnatasha12346 @lesbionion @nova-kyle @darkstar225 @saraaahsstuff @marvelwomenarehot0 @screechcat @iheartjohansson @tia-thesimp @swaqcenix @karmasgxrl @marvel-lous3000 @n0txn3vee @lorsstar1st

#abby anderson x reader #abby and lev #abby x reader #abby the last of us #abby tlou #abby anderson #tlou au #tlou fanfic #tlou2 #tlou #the last of us #the last of us part 2 #the last of us fic #the last of us part two #wlw #lesbian #reader insert #lev tlou #yara tlou

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ghoularaki · 2 months

Text

baby's breath | 10

↠ summary: Merely by coincidence, Erwin, your father's former friend had crossed paths with you again after nearly a decade. He offered solace once finding out you were struggling with not just school, but your home life as well. His home he shared with another one of your father's friends, Levi, became a sanctuary. Though, the more you came over for study sessions, the more they wiggled themselves into your private life. And like baby's breath, they weeded themselves in so deep you couldn't uproot them.

↠ word count: 5,474

↠ pairing: levi ackerman x reader x erwin smith

↠ genre/warnings: angst, smut, modern au, DARK CONTENT, yandere, daddy kink, forced infantilism, pet play, age gap, collars, vomiting, anal fingering/plugs, bondage, orgasm denial

Furious shouting roused you from your light sleep. Blinking at the sun flowing from your open curtains, you strained your ears to hear closer.

From the voice alone, you knew Levi had been the one yelling. The seething, piercing words were too uncharacteristic of Erwin. His anger was more a biting frostbite rather than a scathing, festering burn. You could barely make out the words Levi grumbled. Since Erwin didn’t reply back, you could only assume he had been on the phone.

You winced when an audible, “Are you fucking brain dead?” rang throughout the house.

His anger terrified you. This past week had been nothing short of torture. Neither men mentioned or acknowledged your little escape attempt. It had been suspiciously swept under the rug. As if you accidentally dropped a cup rather than you trying to claw your way from their unrelenting grasp. Too scared to make the wrong move, this whole week you didn’t crawl out of your crate to signal towards the neighbors.

One thing for certain was that the collar hadn’t left your throat. Even when you were bathed, not once had Levi peeled it from your neck. The threat that he would fry you in the bathtub, killing you in the most agonizing way possible didn’t need to be said.

As Levi’s shouting increased, the bedroom door creaked open. In came Erwin with an ever present pleasant look on his face. He did not seem phased by Levi’s screams or what caused his ire.

“Good morning, Princess,” Erwin smiled, not even flinching when something crashed behind the door followed by a string of curses.

Your eyes bounced from the door to Erwin. You counted the days and from what you gathered, today’s Friday. Though Levi nor Erwin made any effort to follow the routine established. You shrank further into your crate.

“You’ll be spending the morning with me instead,” At your nervous look, he reassured you, “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you just as well as Levi does.”

Erwin walked further in, key in hand. Unlocking the crate, he leaned down and gently grabbed your forearm and tore you away from your sense of comfort. How gently Erwin had been treating you only furthered your suspicions. Even Levi had been oddly reserved. He rarely hurled insults or condescending lessons about how idiotic you were. You were driving yourself insane waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Maybe this was the rest of the punishment Erwin alluded to. The psychological warfare of not knowing. To be constantly left in the dark, them playing god. Your life sat in their hands, theirs to spin and toil within their unforgiving palms.

The lumbering man departed from you to go to your dresser and closet to pick out your clothes for today. You idly stretched your tightly coiled muscles from being crammed into the crate all night long. Satisfied with his choices, he walked back to you. Today he chose a skirt with a ruffled tank top. His large palm slipped down your spine to rest on the small of your back. You shivered at the burning warmth.

“Come, little one.”

The door left ajar, his free hand opened it more to steer you towards the bathroom. Vomit crept up in your throat. As Levi had been occupied that meant Erwin would be the one to bathe and brush your teeth. Erwin hadn’t seen you naked since your first day here. And in that vulnerable, lucid state his hand had wandered even for a brief second. Despite what Levi had done to you—ultimately, significantly worse than Erwin has physically done—you preferred Levi. At least in the tub his hands never wandered, everything stayed clinical. You knew one day Levi would breach that line, but for now, you knew you were safe. Or at least had the illusion of it.

Surprisingly, Levi was predictable. Erwin was anything but. A master of mind games and composure. You didn’t know what could push him to the edge. What made him tick. Levi despised disobedience and lack of control. Erwin would smile at your insolence with that chilling simper, like you were a stupid child throwing a tantrum. Without any words he knew how to make you little, insignificant, weak.

As you crossed further down the hall, you spied Levi through the archway, pacing between the kitchen and living room. His phone still in his hand, he stayed silent, listening to what’s reported over the other line.

“You didn’t think to watch those labeled as feral?” His voice didn’t lose any of its verocity. He’s silent for a moment before continuing, “They have microchips for a reason, you fucking idiot, use it.”

Levi made eye contact with you and scowled further. He walked further into the kitchen while Erwin directed you into the bathroom with a firm push. Apparently you heard more than you were supposed to. You were confused about what they were talking about. The more they spoke about whatever business they were a part of, the harder it became to decipher. You knew it couldn’t be legal but how morally skewed it could be sat heavy in your stomach. When you were first kidnapped they talked about cargo and girls not adjusting. If what they did to you, they were doing on a wider scale had your throat closing up.

You stood in the bathroom, the door behind you clicked. His hands moved between your shoulder blades to bring you closer to the sink. He placed the clothes on the counter. Spinning you around, Erwin tucked his hands under your armpits and lifted you onto the counter with ease. At this point, you didn’t know why it shocked you the strength he possessed. It didn’t comfort you.

“Sit tight,” He cooed.

Walking over to the tub, he started the bath. He grabbed the sweet, strawberry soap and poured it in with the rushing, warm water. You waited for the panic to build up at the sound, but oddly your heart stayed stagnant. You filed that information away for later. Not ready to process that information.

As the water filled the tub, Erwin came back and resumed the routine Levi had set up. You watched in apprehension as he grabbed the toothbrush and sickly saccharine toothpaste. Gently, he grasped your jaw and dug his thumb into the divot to force your mouth open. He didn’t even offer you the opportunity to be stubborn. Your mouth agape, his hand naturally moved down so his palm cupped and encompassed your throat.

Back slightly hunched to get a better look, Erwin stared intently at your teeth, just as thorough as Levi. Light pink, almost white foam started to fill your mouth, but he made no move to let you spit. The foam slipped down from the corners and onto his hand.

“What a messy girl,” Erwin’s voice lilted.

You might actually vomit.

Pulling away, he let you lean over to spit. Bringing you back up, he grabbed your jaw again. “Tongue out.”

You scowled, “I know what to do.”

He raised a thick brow at the sudden attitude. “I’m sure you do.”

Knowing it’s better to just get it done and over with, you let your tongue loll out. Satisfaction spread across Erwin’s face. When he brought the brush to your tongue, you were half tempted to rip it from his hand and stab him in the eye with it. Mentally shaking off the intrusive thought, you let him scrub your tongue clean.

You dared not make eye contact with him. Staring at his prominent nose, you intensely ignored how his eyes bounced up to yours. You despise the tension he created. Noticing that you wouldn’t look at him, he sighed and pulled away. Bent over, you spit once more. He turned on the sink and ran the brush under the water. He tapped the plastic against the porcelain with a tink, tink and placed it back into the pink cup.

As he turned off the faucets, the lack of running water left the silence deafening. You went to get off the counter, wanting at least some sort of autonomy, but Erwin quickly stopped you. Grabbing your hips, you instantly bristled. Standing in between your legs, he stapled you to the counter.

“What are you doing?”

“What are you doing?” You snapped back at him. Why was he making this so difficult?

“Do you give this much trouble to Levi?”

You sneered, “I’m not giving you trouble. I’m getting off the counter so I can get in the tub.”

He chewed on your words. Processing how your mannerisms were set by how Levi treated you. “I expected Levi to be more hands on.”

“No, he actually treats me like an adult,” You barked.

His fingers dug into your hips. Traveling downwards, his fingers crept under the loose material and made contact with your bare skin. “Is that what you want? To be treated like an adult? I don’t think you like what that entails when it comes to me, Princess.”

Sweat dripped down your back as that nausea came back tenfold. His large hands went up, grazing your flesh, sitting right under your breasts. Tears threatened to spill over. You stared at the older man in front of you with deep contempt. You both knew what he meant. Sure, he could give you some wiggle room to be treated like the grown up you were, but that meant he could be more self indulgent.

“So what will it be?” He already knew the answer.

Sagging into him, you rest your head against his shoulder. Tilting his chin down, he kissed the crown of your head. Going back down, he placed his hands on your waist and lifted you off the counter. Stepping back to give you room, the offending hands grabbed your shirt.

“Arms up.”

Begrudgingly, you listened. He lifted the material off you, folded it and threw it into the hamper by the tub. You noticed how different the two men were. Erwin was a man of elegance and poise, every move meticulous. As if he thought out each and every move and word he spoke. While Levi, naturally carried himself with particular grace.

You crossed your arms to cover yourself.

“Uh, uh, none of that,” Erwin scolded. He grabbed your arms to bring them down and you struggled, hating to be so exposed to him.

Just as he tugged your arms away from your chest, the door creaked. Peering over Erwin’s shoulder, Levi strided into the room. The anger still radiated off him in pungent waves. With Erwin’s hands gripping your forearms, you knew exactly what it looked like. You flinched away, not wanting his anger to be directed towards you.

The panic snuck back up. This is it. He was finally going to fulfill the full punishment in mind. He was going to shock you again. Shock you until your brain fried so you wouldn’t even think to run away again, or better yet think at all ever again. A perfect housebroken pet.

Your chest heaved up and down as you get lost in your head. Fear encased you in its riptide. Just as you were about to burst into tears and babbles of apologies, Levi broke his gaze.

Turning towards Levi, Erwin let go of you and brought his full attention to him.

“Any updates?”

“Yeah, no one knows how to do their fucking jobs. I need to leave for the day to clean up the mess.” His tone pinched, clearly irritated.

Erwin hummed. Not entirely displeased with the information given to him. Even as he talked to Levi, his touch didn’t once leave you. A hand wrapped around your wrist, not letting you cover up still.

“Do have fun with that.”

Levi raised a brow, “You got everything handled?” He glanced at you and then back at Erwin.

He dropped your wrist to pet your head, stroking your hair. “She’ll be on her best behavior. Right, Princess?”

You nodded your head. The threat hung in the air.

Levi stared at you suspiciously, those grey irises piercing through you for any deceit. When his phone rang again, he decided to let it go.

Picking it up, he growled, “I’m coming, calm your shit.” With one last sneer, he stomped out the bathroom and slammed the door closed behind him.

Levi gone, Erwin brought his attention back to you. Going back to your shorts, he tugged them down along with your panties. You clenched your fists to resist the urge to cover yourself. Kneeling before you, he tapped each ankle to have you step out of the garments.

Throwing them into the hamper with your shirt, he guided you into the tub. Clutching your hand in his, he helped you in case you slipped. Sinking into the water, you let the warm liquid wrap around you. Disappearing into the bubbles, you blew away the foam floating towards your face.

Erwin sat on the edge of the tub, his gaze morphed into something soft, content. Unable to help himself, he stroked your hair once more. You were everything he ever wanted and he had you right in his palm. His darling girl, he waited so long to have you with him.

“Come on, let’s get you washed up. It’s not every day I get to have you all to myself.”

You gulped at his words. Reluctantly, you forced your back straight. The soapy, milky water no longer covered you. Dejected, you stared at how the white bubbles swirled in mini galaxies. Your body swayed with each movement of Erwin scrubbing you clean. He had been admittedly softer than Levi, but each lingering touch had you trembling.

In no time, he had finished washing you to his contentment. Unplugging the drain, he pulled you out and dressed you for the day. He would purposely brush his fingers against your flushed skin while Levi seemed like he couldn’t dress you faster. You couldn’t help comparing the two.

Finished, he led you out of the bathroom and into the kitchen. He lifted you up by your underarms again, this time on the counter by the stove. You felt more like a doll than a human. You were Erwin’s favorite toy he dragged to and fro.

Sat on the cool marble, you didn’t stray from Erwin cooking you both breakfast. He moved around with ease. You never took him as someone who enjoyed cooking, but you were proven wrong. Sometimes you forget he’s indeed a human who needed to eat and had interests. To you, he seemed above all that.

“You’re staring, Sweetheart,” Erwin smiled, not taking his eyes away from the pan.

“I didn’t think you could cook.”

Amusement strewn across his face, “Do I seem that incompetent?”

“No, just arrogant enough to have someone else do it for you.”

Surprisingly, he chuckled. You expected him to be more stern with you, intolerant to your sass. Though he took it in stride. If anything he loved bantering with you. He wasn’t a complete tyrant, or at least he thought so.

Nothing made sense. Anytime you gave lip, you were always quickly punished since being kidnapped. They were confusing you. This had to be a trap, some sort of ploy to get you to lower your guard so they can strike when you least expect it. Your nails throbbed from digging into the counter, anything to ground yourself.

As you silently spiraled, Erwin picked you up and placed you on a chair. Apparently, he had already set the table. Sitting next to you, he turned both your chairs so you faced each other enough for him to feed you.

Erwin left you no room to turn your head away as he kept a firm hand on your nape. Flashbacks to being force-fed until you were begging for no more pounded in your mind, you opened your mouth. Unable to look at him, you kept your focus on the kitchen table.

There.

There, sat on the table could be your way out. Levi had forgotten to hide his migraine medicine. From the container, you could tell it’s over the counter, but depending on how much is left could be your ticket out. No, you didn’t have any thoughts of suicide—you refused to die here—but if you took enough to land you in the hospital, it would be your chance.

You didn’t stare longer than a second, not enough for Erwin to also notice. So you played along, you would open your mouth every time he gave you another forkful. You still didn’t make eye contact, but you let him have his fun. Anything to distract him.

“What a good baby,” He crooned, his hand massaged your nape. You fell limp.

Finished eating, his hand slipped from you and got up to put away the dishes. With his back turned, you swiped the tiny bottle. The tap tuned out the rattling of the pills. Hastily, you uncapped the lid and saw it had been half full. You dared not to hesitate as you down the pills. Shivering at the bitter taste, you tried not to gag as they got caught in your throat. Grabbing your untouched cup of orange juice, you chugged the liquid.

You slapped a hand over your mouth to stifle your gag reflex. The little, white pills burned going down.

“What did you do?” Erwin shouted.

He turned around to see the bottle bouncing on the ground and you hunched over.

You frantically got off the chair and put some distance between the two of you. Erwin bent down to grab the bottle to find out exactly what you took. His eyes widened at the sight.

Wasting no time, the huge man marched his way to you. He harshly grabbed your arm, tugged you close to him. His scowl showed his age.

“Throw up.”

You quickly shook your head, scared that if you talked you would do just that. He gripped your mandible and forced your jaw open.

“Throw up,” He repeated, a sneer on his lips.

“Take me,” You forced a gag back, “to the hospital.”

He coldly stared at you. Spinning you around, he slung an arm around your waist and forced you over the sink. The hand on your jaw jammed his fingers down your esophagus. He purposely touched the back of your throat. You gagged around his fingers.

Not wanting to vomit, you bit down on his fingers but he only grabbed your waist harder. Shoving his fingers further, you gagged again and vomit rushed out. Ripping his fingers out before any expelled onto him. He squeezed you as you retched the pills and food up. The rancid smell triggered another vomiting spell.

You continued to cough and spit until you couldn’t anymore. Tears spilled down your cheeks, your lips were numb and your brain pounded in your skull. You sagged against the sink. Shoulders heaving from the strain, saliva dribbled out from your bottom lip. Erwin flipped on the faucet, the vomit washing down with it.

Above you Erwin seethed, “Are you happy with yourself.”

Tears still in your eyes, you started to laugh. Of course your plan didn’t work in your favor. Nothing ever does. Cackling harder, you dropped your head to rest against the rim of the sink.

Departing from you, Erwin went to grab his phone. You slipped down until you sat on the ground. Spinning around, you rest your back against the cabinets. The giggles trailed off until you were completely silent.

Erwin’s frantic voice became mere background noise as you stared at the useless, empty pill bottle that rolled under the table. Coming back into view, Erwin crouched in front of you. All warmth had left his face. Those haunting blue irises peered into you.

“You never know when to stop, do you?”

Refusing to answer, you lolled your head to the side.

He quickly grabbed your hair and forced you to look at him. “After all I have done for you. Why must you be so stubborn?”

“Why do you think!” You heaved, voiced strained.

His face turned cold as marble. “I thought after last week, you would have finally learned, but we have been too lenient, especially me.”

Tugging you up by your hair, he dragged you to your room you had been in only a couple hours prior too and threw you into the crate. He locked it as you were slumped across the plushies. Standing up to his full height, he stared at you in grim disappointment.

“Think about what you have done. Levi will be home soon.”

The sound of the front door slamming closed awakened you from your unsuspected slumber. As you stewed in your own anxiety from Erwin’s thinly veiled threat, your body finally shut down from all the stress accumulating the past few days. Plus you have no clue if all the pills left your system. You could only hope your half-assed plan was what did you in.

Light poured in from the bedroom door swinging open. Levi stood in the frame, enmity twisted into his sneer.

“I can’t fucking leave you alone for one goddamn moment,” Each word was emphasized with every stride towards the crate.

Bent down to unlock it, he continued, “Because of you I had to leave right when the situation was almost solved, but now they got away again and I have to go back out again. This time for longer, but I can’t even do shit until I’m done dealing with you.”

Slamming the crate door, he grabbed your upper arm and dragged you out. His pace was too fast for you to keep up with, you stumbled after him. Forcing you further into the home, he took you to the door that led into the basement. Dread consumed you. You did not want to go back down there. Frantically, you started pulling on his hold and even using your free hand to pry his fingers from your bicep.

Stopping on the stairs, one stair below you, he jostled you and forced you to hunch over to get in your face, “You do not want to piss me off any more than you already have.”

Whimpering, you tried to bargain with him, “I’m scared.”

He glared further, “You should be.”

Storming down the rest of the stairs, he pulled you further into the familiar room. The soft lighting greeted you once more along with the array of bondage tools. Luckily, he walked right past the metal table he had taken you on you don’t even remember how long ago now and threw you onto the velvet couch.

“Sit, don’t even fucking think of moving.” He pointed a finger at you with a growl.

Lifting yourself up from the awkward position he pushed you into, you brought your knees to your chest and cradled yourself. There was no use in running, you still had the collar on and you don’t think you could handle being electrocuted twice in the span of a week. Though, you couldn’t help staring at the stairs laid out before you. From around the corner, you heard Levi rummaging through the closet for something. You were terrified to find out what he had in mind.

Emerging from around the corner, Levi had a muzzle, tail, clear bottle, and oddly what looked like leather mittens in his hand. Sitting down on the couch beside you, he made quick work to grab you by the nape of your neck and force you to straddle him. Sat on his strong thighs, you glanced at the things he placed on the right side of him.

“Hands.”

Releasing your neck, he grabbed your right hand before you could even process his command. Grabbing the leather mitten, he shoved your hand into it. It must have been too small. To accommodate for the size, you had to tuck your fingers to your palm including your thumb. He threaded and tightened the belt-like strap placed on your wrist.

“W-what are you doing?”

You were swiftly silenced with a firm slap across your left cheek. Shock rippled through you. Sniffles broke through the air from the humiliation.

Ignoring you, Levi took your bare hand and repeated restricting you. You inspected the gloves to see paw pads at the bottom. He can’t be serious.

Taking your jaw into his grasp, he turned you back towards him. He grabbed the next thing, the muzzle.

At that you glowered, “No.”

He dug his nails in your cheeks and squeezed so hard your mandible creaked. “You don’t get the liberty to tell me what I can and can’t do. Should have thought twice before downing a bottle of pills like a fucking idiot.”

You opened your mouth to give another rebuttal, but he shoved the muzzle onto your face. The way the metal cage had been structured, while he looped the belts behind your hand and at the base of your skull, it left your jaw immobilized. You physically couldn’t move your jaw up or down. So no talking, no biting and most importantly, no purposely ingesting a handful of pills.

“Off,” Levi barked.

Not wanting to stay any longer on his lap than needed, you were quick to follow instructions. But before you could find relief, he grabbed your arm and threw you across his thighs. Bottom perched on his lap, it gave him ample access. Scrambling to get off him, you kicked your feet and tried to hit him with your incapacitated hands. He gathered one of your wrists in his hand and twisted your arm behind your back so far you shouted. Or at least, as much as you could with the muzzle.

“You won’t like if I do this one handed, so stop fucking moving.”

Scared of the implication, you fell limp and stared at the room. Your eyes traced the pattern of the caged shelves over and over. A muffled whimper fell when Levi perked your hips up higher to peel your skirt and panties down to be pooled around your knees. The last time you were bare like this for Levi, he had spanked and drowned you (again) within an inch of your life.

“Quiet, bad dogs don’t get to complain.”

Behind you, the click of a lid being uncapped rang in the stagnant room. His freezing fingertips grazed your bare butt and you flinched from the sudden touch. Gently, he rubbed the skin, easing you into what was about to happen.

“You’re lucky I’m being so generous. If I had it my way, I would shove it in with no prep and let your own blood serve as lube.”

Your shoulder blades tightened at his words. Before you could completely process what he meant, his fingers dug into the cleft of your butt and spread you apart, asshole and pussy on full display.

Dribbling the lube from the bottle, you shuttered at the strange sensation of cold touching the puckered muscles. You never had anything or anyone touch down there. The slippery liquid drooped down in your pussy causing your cheeks to warm. You started to kick up a fuss again when a digit touched your hole, but instantly stopped when he laid a firm spank.

“Going unprepped is still on the table, pup.”

You flipped your head to look at him and rapidly shook your head in protest.

“No? Then stop moving.”

Forcing yourself to relax, you sagged once more and accepted your fate. Levi dragged a finger down to scoop the lube that fell into your cunny and brought it back up to your puckered hole. Spreading your legs a little, Levi pressed the muscles with firm circles, loosening them up. Your breathing got heavy as he toyed with you. Your shoulders curled in as he pushed the first knuckle of his finger inside.

“Mmm”, You softly whined, unable to make more noise than that.

He pushed further in until his whole finger sat inside you. Your pussy pulsed from the neglect, wanting to be filled instead. Dragging the digit almost out, he thrust it back in. Arching, you squirmed, not knowing if you hated or liked it.

Laying his forearm across your back, he forced your chest down onto the couch further. Tugging his one finger out, he came back with two and stretched you more. This time, it did burn and your feet kicked at the pain. Letting you be, Levi upped his thrust to a more brutal pace.

More whines and hushed moans left you as he scissored his fingers. Your clit throbbed, begging to be touched, too. You despised how this man played with your body. He knew exactly how to torment you.

Pulling his fingers completely out, you heard him huff at your disappointed whimper. Uncapping the bottle again, you shuttered at the sound. This time something cold and obviously metal pushed against your hole.

“Hnng!” You cried out.

Levi didn’t push in any further. Dragging his other hand to your cunt, he stroked up and down the slit.

“I wonder if this is lube or you’re just wet,” He mocked you, loving how tears collected on your eyelashes.

His hand didn’t leave your cunt. Going further down, he twiddled your clit. You instinctively spread your legs more, as far as the garments around your knees could allow. The thing placed on your hole started to push further in. Clenching up, Levi swirled your clit more. Distracted, what you could now assume was a plug, plunged deeper inside. The ring of muscle spread further to suck in the toy. Pinching your clit, he rammed the rest of it inside.

Tensing further, you sobbed at being filled so harshly. The metal sat heavy in your ass. What made it worse was the soft fur that sat on your lower back. He stuck a tail plug inside you. Tapping the base, you whined at him jostling the plug. Giving one last pat to your clit, Levi forced you up and straddled his hips again.

Your aching clit sat on his obvious hard-on through his jeans. Mitted hands rested in the juncture of your spread legs and his lower stomach. His own cheeks were barely flushed, arousal apparent if you looked close enough. Levi reached to the side of him to show the headband he twirled in his fingers. Two greyish-brown, puppy ears had been threaded though the skinny headband. Placing them on your head, your whole look was complete.

Hooking a finger under the collar, the older man brought you close to his face. “Will you be a good pet or not?”

Exhausted, you nodded your head.

Releasing you, he pushed you off his lap and to stand in between his legs. Levi tugged down your skirt and panties, leaving your lower half bare. The lube and your own wetness made your puffy pussy glisten. Knowing your own neediness will be neglected, you pushed down wanting to rub your thighs together. You completely and utterly despised him.

Standing up with you, clothes in hand, he went to walk back upstairs. You went to follow, but he stopped you instantly.

“Dogs don’t walk.”

You hated him. Oh God, did you hate him. Scowling, you fell to your knees, not breaking your ireful gaze. Levi watched you crawl towards the stairs. Staying behind you, he stared at your exposed pussy. The tail swayed with your hips.

Unable to stop himself, he slapped your cunt. His fingers caught your clit while the end of his palm hit the plug inside you. The smack made an audible, wet slap. Stumbling, you shouted as you crumpled on the stairs. Catching your breath, you continue crawling upwards, on edge of him hitting you again.

Reaching the door, you sat by the frame waiting for his instructions.

“Go to your room.”

Reluctantly, you listened and crawled back into the house. Shame encompassed you and you prayed Erwin was somewhere else. Your knees started to ache from digging into the floors. At your room, you waited for Levi to open the door, not sitting so the plug wouldn’t be shoved more in.

“Crate.”

You hesitated. You didn’t want to go in there like this. Being in that cage meant you would be left alone until the next morning.

Impatient, Levi grabbed the back of your collar. An ugly gag tumbled out of you, as he dug the collar into your throat. Shoving you in the crate, he shut and locked the door. Yelping, you landed on your butt, the plug punched further inside.

“If I have to come back before everything is fixed, Erwin might need to find a new plaything sooner than he expected.”

Letting his threat hang in the air, he turned off the lights and slammed your door shut, leaving you in the dark.

network @interstellar-inn

#yandere x reader #yandere levi #yandere levi x reader #yandere erwin #yandere erwin x reader #yandere erwin smith #yandere #yandere x you #yandere aot #yandere smut #aot smut

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crazylittlejester · 2 months

Text

The LU Chain but I assign them a random family member stereotype and then you imagine all these people at holiday dinner

Time: Dad, he just wants to watch the goddamn football game in peace but he’s long ago accepted that’s never gonna happen, so he’s trying to stop people from killing each other. Has beat up Your Uncle at past gatherings, will do so again if necessary

Warriors: Mom, and he is not afraid to hit someone with a pot lid for insulting his cooking. But he made different dishes for all the people with different texture issues because he cares, and he put way too much effort into the decorations and matching the napkins to the tablecloth is wine drunk by the end of the night and screams at Your Uncle

Twilight: Your cousin who’s older than you by 5+ years but who’s always been really nice. Chill vibes, but disappears halfway through the family gathering. Is he out smoking? Did he leave the property entirely? No one knows. He doesn’t like Your Uncle, so that might be why he disappeared

Sky: Aunt, but not wine aunt. He brought The Casserole (everyone takes psychic damage). He’s from Dad’s side of the family, lucky him he has no connection to Your Uncle

Wild: Your neurodivergent cousin, the one who went to art school and is a huge advocate for mental health (/pos) Your Uncle hates him

Hyrule: The Middle Child. Also vanishes halfway through the dinner, except that’s because he’s actually some supernatural being trapped in human form honored as a local cryptid who has a desperate urge to go out after dark and stand ominously in a field and go touch grass. The family refers to these disappearances as his “Me Time”, they’re not concerned

Legend: Eldest Daughter, is ready to fight Your Uncle about politics (your uncle will be annihilated). Dyed his hair halfway through the dinner and used the fact that Your Uncle commented on it to start a fight

Four: Your neurodivergent cousin, but the one who is a redditor. He’s definitely posted “Am I The Asshole?” posts about this family (the asshole has never been him)

Wind: Baby Boy. He knew what a fork was and everyone was so proud (he’s going insane and testing the limits to see what the bare minimum he can do is while still getting praised for existing. All the other ‘kids’ want him dead)

The Lizard Who Beat The Shit Out Of Twi: Your Uncle

#shit posting once again #this is all very /j #my head hurts so bad i can barely see this is pure crack #might delete later because this is dumb as hell #jes talks #jes ask #linked universe #linkeduniverse

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bethanydelleman · 11 months

Note

There’s a new book out called The Darcy Myth that says in the summary that P&P is actually a “horror novel” about how scary love is for women… I know the Bennet sisters’ situation is precarious but to call it a “horror novel” ? :P

Okay... so... ug.... did this woman even read Pride & Prejudice? Because from the news coverage I would say no. Let me highlight some passages from the article:

Darcy should be considered the main antagonist of the famous love story

Not Wickham? Not the man who runs off with literal teenage girls?

Darcy pays Wickham to marry Lydia, saving her reputation, and later tells Elizabeth, “I thought only of you” when acting. For Feder, this phrase is proof of the hero’s self-interest. Darcy condemns Lydia to a life with an amoral man, all so the Bennets don’t become so disreputable that he won’t be able to marry the woman he loves.

Um, sorry, but no. Darcy tried to get Lydia away FIRST, she refused, he respected Lydia's autonomy as a human being. Becoming brother-in-law to Wickham was probably worse for Darcy personally than Lydia being "ruined"

I found Feder’s exploration of “Pride and Prejudice”as a Gothic novel — rather than a comedy of manners — far more compelling than her critique of Darcy.

Wut? No. Not even a little bit, what? That is a different genre.

“Darcy helped codify the dominant expectation that potential romantic partners — especially heterosexual men — are not only still eligible but in fact more appealing when they play a little hard to get, even if playing hard to get involves cruelty, insults, expressions of disinterest, ruining your beloved sister’s chances of happiness, and other red flags,” she writes. Women spend their time, energy and emotions on men who, quite simply, are not worth their effort.

Okay, except ELIZABETH NEVER TRIES ANYTHING WITH DARCY. She just sits there and he falls in love with her. If she did put effort into any relationship it was with Wickham, who again, is presented as a massive red flag in the end. This line of argument is wild.

Yet, seeing the sheer number of times women pursue cruel men in pop culture laid out one after another — in Disney movies, Taylor Swift songs and much more — is affecting. Feder concludes convincingly that this cultural conviction harms women in the same way the patriarchal boundaries of the regency did. She writes: “If we zoom out, we see that the Darcy myth also helps to prop up and fortify a very Gothic, patriarchal universe that is, and always has been, scary for anyone who is not a very particular type of man. After all, if we are trained from childhood to invest ourselves in men who treat us poorly, aren’t we more likely to end up in abusive situations and under threat of assault?”

Okay, so this is a valid point, but it also is based on a misreading of Pride & Prejudice or is heavily influenced by adaptations. Darcy isn't cruel, he's snobby and somewhat rude but definitely NOT cruel. Wickham is exactly the type of man you want to avoid: charming until he isn't.

ALSO WHAT DISNEY PRINCE IS AN ASSHOLE??? @princesssarisa? Can you be offended at that one in my stead?

So... this book sounds like rage-bait insanity and I won't be reading it until proved otherwise. Putting it on the avoid shelf along with Secret Radical.

Last note: There is a valid point to be made that jerks or dark broody men have been romanticized, but Austen DOES NOT DO THAT. That is not an Austen thing. Use an actual problematic Gothic or Byronic hero.

#question response #this is nuts #the darcy myth #just looks like rage bait to me #the arguments are nonsensical #Now I'm going to have to fight this book on Reddit too #oh joy

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boxboxlewis · 11 months

Note

prompt: drunk, bored alex bossily trying to convince sober george to make out with him. george knowing if this happens, he will reveal Everything (disastrous; the thing he wants most in the word; will ruin their friendship), so he tries to distract alex with napoleon's correspondence.

Alex was buzzed enough that the hotel room had started to swirl around him in a gentle anticlockwise spiral. He was starfished on his back on the queen-sized bed, feet hanging off the end, and the gravity holding him in place felt heavier than usual but also friendly, as if it wanted him to be happy and comfortable.

“George,” he said, except it came out too long, stretched and languid. Geoooooooorge. He cleared his throat and tried again. “George. Look, mate, this is important.”

“No it’s not.”

Alex ignored this. “I really think we should. Like, I think it’s a good idea. Ojbec—objectively.”

There was no reply, so Alex lifted his head up off the pillow. It took more effort than usual, due to the gravity thing, but he got a good view of George hunched over at the weirdly small hotel desk, staring at his tablet, not looking at Alex at all.

“Are you looking at porn?”

“No, I’m not looking at—fuck’s sake, Alex! I’m reading my emails. Mostly, I’m ignoring you.”

This was hurtful. “Why?” Alex asked, hurt. He carefully lowered his head back down.

“Because you’re totally off your tits and you keep asking me to make out with you,” George said. “And I know you don’t actually want to and you’re only saying it because you’re depressed that you got P17, because you’re insanely competitive even when you’re driving a Roomba. So. I’m doing the decent thing and not responding.”

“The FW45 is not a Roomba!” Alex said, and then, after a pause for thought, “Roombas can sense walls.”

“Right, yeah, that’s the relevant point here,” George said. “C’mon Alex, why are you even going on about this? You’re straight.”

George made the word “straight” sound vaguely insulting, which was, Alex thought, interesting. He was too drunk to work out why, but perhaps that could be a project for his sober, more brain-forward self. In the meantime, he tried to wrestle his thoughts into order so he could answer the question George had asked. Why was he going on about this? Well, George was very pretty, for one thing. Pretty face, pretty body. “You have eyelashes like a camel,” he said, and laughed at the despairing groan George let out. “What, you do! Also, I’m bored, and there’s no one else here.” That sounded wrong, and wasn’t really what Alex meant, but he didn’t know how to fix it. “I don’t mean—there’s loads of people at this Grand Prix, obviously. But like. In my hotel room, it’s only us.”

There was a brittle little silence from George, during which the room continued gently spinning. Eventually George said, “Thanks Alex, but somehow I’m going to have to turn down this incredibly flattering offer.”

“Hey, c’mon, wait—”

“Move over or I’ll sit on you.” George sounded impatient and grumpy, like maybe the emails he’d been reading had upset him. Alex did as he was told, and carefully rolled himself over to one side of the bed. He felt the mattress dip as George sat next to him. “Right,” George said. “As you’re clearly bored, and a menace, I’m going to entertain you. All right?”

“Entertain me… with your mouth?” Alex asked, hopeful.

George exhaled loudly. “Yeah, close, Alex. No, even better than that. I’m going to read to you from the correspondence of Napoleon Buonaparte.”

“Napoleon? The short git with the hat? ‘Able was I ere I saw Elba,’ that guy?” Alex got a bit tongue-twisted on the palindrome, but who wouldn’t.

“The very one, mate. I’ve been reading his writings for inspiration on the track.”

That was objectively insane, of course, but also somehow the most charming thing Alex had ever heard. He could feel fondness fountaining out of his chest so strongly he was surprised the billowing golden splashes of it weren’t actually visible. “Fucking hell,” he said. “George, I like you so much.”

“I—what?”

“That’s why we should make out,” Alex explained. “Because… because when two people like each very much, that’s what they should do.” He turned over so he could see the effect this line of argument was having on George.

George looked mildly concussed. “Alex, are you having me on?”

“No!” Alex felt indignant at the idea. “Georgie, I wouldn’t, about this. You know I wouldn’t.”

When George swallowed Alex could see the motion in the beautiful tanned line of his neck. “Right,” he said. “Well then. I’m not going to make out with you now, you’re absolutely munted, but. Ask me again in the morning, Alex.”

Alex nodded, and let his eyes drift shut. “Brilliant,” he said. “Will do.”

thank you to sarah for the best prompt game in the business, and to @onadarklingplain for reading this over and helping me figure out the ending!

#galex #my fic #gr63 #aa23 #why is george stone cold sober while alex is hammered? OBJECTION #beyond the scope of this ficlet! but lets say he's on abx or something #for my successionheads the napoleon thing is making me think about george/conor parallels lol

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duckprintspress · 20 days

Note

Sorry for being a little in the dark, but can you explain what happened with NaNoWriMo? Or at least point me towards some resources pls?

Hey anon!

Never apologize for that. Life is so fucking busy, no one can be apprised of everything going on all the time. Our brains would break even trying. Anyway, multiple things have happened with NaNoWriMo, but for the current debacle, the best answer is probably to read their own words as appended in a reblog to my original post about how to delete.

The TL:DR is, to paraphrase NaNo's own words (after they got a sponsorship from ProWritingAid, an "AI" company), they support using "AI" as part of NaNoWriMo, accusing people who disagree of being ableist and classist.

Having read both their statements, they at least imply that they mean "AI" such as grammar checkers, rather than generative "AI," but they don't actually clarify and it's at best ambiguous if they include generative LLM as being allowed and reasonable. When people got upset with them, they doubled down, saying things like "not everyone can afford an editor," which as someone who personally couldn't afford an editor and so taught myself to edit at a professional level over ten years, I'll own I find a fucking insane and insulting take. A lot of us worked our asses off to learn these skills, and it's not classist to suggest that other people...can learn too. But also...like...if I was certain they only meant grammar checkers, I might be a bit more forgiving (I mean, I use Word's grammar checker, though it's often wrong), but which LLM usages they're actually defending isn't clarified and they jump right to defending their position by tarring people who disagree with them as -isms, and that's some kinda bs argument right there.

To be clear, I think policies banning people from using LLMs in events like NaNoWriMo or on platforms like AO3 is an exercise in futility. Bans are unenforceable, and attempts to moderate will turn into harassment tools. The line between "work written by someone who isn't proficient yet" and "LLM" isn't clear, and policing that line would consume huge amounts of moderating effort for basically no benefit. IMO, for places like AO3 the best bet is simply transparency, as in, people using LLMs should fucking tag it.

To be clear secondarily, putting my "I own a small Press" hat, if someone sends us something verifiably LLM-generated, they will be permanently banned, but honestly, even something I can't verify as LLM-generated, like. Won't be good writing. It might be technically precise but an LLM can't generate a coherent story because it can't think or remember. It's just a word-probability engine. We've never had an LLM-generated submission to the best of my knowledge, but if we did, well. Ban hammer.

Anyway. Sorry. I got off topic. The point is, NaNo basically said we were all ableist and classist because we want people to write (even if they write badly!) for the...write a novel challenge.

And this made a lot of people very angry.

#unforth replies #nanowrimo

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faramirsonofgondor · 22 days

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Insane how many TV show characters have incredibly traumatic backstories or go through a shit load of trauma only for the writers to be like “yea and then they became an asshole and ruined all their relationship for no reason whatsoever.” and then they’ll be like “what do you mean that’s so out of character? no it’s not i literally wrote the character.” LIKE YES BITCH and they used to be a GOOD person and friend??? they would do anything for their friends and family??? ANYTHING. they spent eons trying to fit in and they dedicated so much time making sure their family was safe. and now you’re saying that they’re just selfish out of nowhere???

OR EVEN WORSE. when they fucking forgive their abuser for no reason or because their abuser was on drugs or addicted to alcohol. and then they get sober and magically become a better person??? what??? you mean the person who neglected their child??? the person who abused their child??? AND THE SAME CHILD GETS HATED ON FOR BEING RUDE OR EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE AND PEOPLE STILL DON’T TRUST THEM OR LIKE THEM EVEN AFTER THEY MADE CONSIDERABLE EFFORTS TO UNLEARN THE HABITS THEY DEVELOPED TO SURVIVE THE ABUSE THEY WENT THROUGH??? IM SO TIRED OF SEEING THIS HAPPEN IN SO MANY TV SHOWS. LIKE IF IT WAS ONCE OR TWICE I WOULD BE ANNOYED BUT ITS FUCKING EVERYWHERE.

Just to be clear I’m not talking about shows that have established characters perpetuating the cycle of abuse from the beginning, or progressively getting worse over time, because while I don’t necessarily like those plot lines, they can make sense when they’re done right. But I fucking hate it when it comes out of nowhere and ruins all the backstory the character had and goes against all their earlier motivations.

And while I don’t particularly like it in TV shows when a character forgives their abuser, I can understand it when the abuser actually realizes the weight of their actions, doesn’t try to excuse them, and makes efforts to do better. But almost all TV shows where the character forgives their abusers ends up with the one who was abused being labeled as a problem child or too much to handle/too difficult and the abuser gets to be forgiven without any real development or apology or effort.

Like there’s so many different examples of this happening - Jamie & James Sr. from Ted Lasso, Jess & Liz from Gilmore Girls, Buck & his parents from 9-1-1, Shawn & Henry from Psych (I said what I said), like half of the entire MCU, and multitude of other characters. Like all of the kids were emotionally neglected and abused (and sometimes physically as well) and then they “acted out” (they insulted people, were maybe a little bitchy, and acted immaturely) and then somehow them acting out and being immature or eccentric becomes a central point of their character, and other characters are often annoyed or upset with this part of the character. But then the adult who yk, abused their fucking child, is viewed sympathetically by the other characters because they “were having such a hard time” and “were really struggling” while they were abusing their child. And now that their kid is all grown up they “don’t want to have a bad relationship” and “only ever wanted what was best for them, they just didn’t know to how give it to them”. LIKE GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK MAN.

How is it the kids fault they were a bit immature or a bit of an asshole after being abused for their whole life but it’s not their abusers fault for abusing them???? like what the fuck??? Like it makes me sick to my stomach when other characters are like “wow it must have been so hard to raise them” when they literally DIDN’T raise them, they fucking abused them. Don’t even get me started on when they give the abused kid an actual parental figure and the abused kid opens up to them about how hard their life was and the parental figure does their best to support the kid only to turn around and encourage the kid to forgive their fucking abuser. Like what are these writers even on????

Anyways fuck forgiveness for the sake of forgiveness. You don’t need to forgive shit just because your abuser had a sad backstory. Womp Womp for them. Addiction doesn’t excuse abuse. Grief doesn’t excuse abuse. Divorce doesn’t excuse abuse. “Wanting what’s best for you” “being raised in a different time” or being “misguided”isn’t an excuse for abuse. Them having abusive parents isn’t an excuse for abuse. There isn’t an excuse for abuse. You don’t need to (and IMO shouldn’t) forgive an abuser just because they’re at a better or more stable point in their life than they were when they abused you or because they suddenly got FOMO and realized they’re gonna die soon and they don’t want a shitty relationship with you. And if they and other people are pressuring you to forgive them, then they clearly don’t realize the weight of their actions or how serious they were.

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accio-sriracha · 10 months

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Winter Drarry for December :)

~~~♤~~~

Draco Malfoy loved winter more than most things in life. Truth be told, it made his cold heart just a little warmer each year.

Harry Potter was the first to notice; when Malfoy actually held a door open for him in their office.

"What's going on with you?" Harry asked suddenly, spinning around on his heel.

Malfoy raised an eyebrow, "Nothing, Potter. Am I not allowed to simply be in a good mood?"

Malfoy's usual insults were replaced with quiet sighs and fond smiles, his morning mug of black coffee replaced with peppermint tea and cinnamon stirring sticks.

He even took the time to partially decorate his office, a simple string of garland around his desk and a wreath at the door.

It was driving Harry insane.

The colder it got outside the happier Malfoy appeared to be, he even showed up at the winter ministry event, events he had never gone to any other time of year.

His smiles were more genuine, and it took a lot more to irritate him than it usually did.

The others were stunned by the change, having never seen him as anything other than Harry Potter's no-nonsense grumpy auror partner. He actually hummed as he walked to the front doors on his lunch.

Harry kept finding reasons to be around him, just so he could see more of this side of Malfoy. He passed through, dropping off papers himself rather than calling for his assistant, asking to borrow a stapler, (which every room between them from the second and third floor carried as well)

He once bumped into him in the hallway, when Malfoy asked where he was off to his only response he could come up with was 'Going on a walk'

Despite Potter's efforts to remain discreet about his newest obsession with Malfoy, Draco noticed right away.

The thing that sold it? The stapler labled Potter's sitting neatly on his desk when Draco popped in to give him a copy of their latest assignment.

Draco decided to let it play out, upping the game a little more by going out of his way to be extra nice to Potter.

He'd offered to pick him up drinks from the cafe whenever he went out, always checked in on him during their field missions and stopped insulting him altogether. At one point, just to see the little vein pop out on Potter's forehead, Draco called him darling.

Potter's reaction was priceless, his face drained of all color for a moment before it all came rushing back into his cheeks at once.

He stammered out an excuse for needing to be somewhere else and hurried away to the nearest lift.

Draco smiled as he watched him go, realising that maybe he enjoyed flustering Potter a little too much.

His next plan was enchanted mistletoe, he set it up above his door, never walking underneath the frame if there was anyone in a five foot radius.

That is, until Potter showed up in his office again that morning, his cheeks still red,

"Hey Malfoy, they're requesting to see us in Kingsley's office for a debriefing at 3:30."

Draco nodded, "Very well, I'll be there."

Potter started to turn before Draco called him back,

"Actually, Potter, do you mind giving this to Lola for me? She asked for these to be delivered as soon as possible and I completely misplaced them yesterday." He held out a few pages clipped together, "You'd be doing me a huge favor." He added in a low voice.

Potter took them with a mute nod and cleared his throat,

"Right, yes. I'll get these to um... to Lola. Thank you." He laughed nervously.

"Everything alright, darling?" Draco asked, using his low voice he typically reserved for intimidating suspects.

"Yep! Yeah, everything's great. I uh-" His back hit the door frame as he took a few steps away, his cheeks flooding with heat again, "I'll go do this now."

The moment Draco stepped under the mistletoe they were both frozen in place. Potter looked up, his eyes wide,

"Is that-" He started. Draco sighed,

"Ahh, I'd forgotten about that. I was using it to try to keep people out of my office." He shrugged casually, "I suppose it backfired."

Potter suddenly looked back down at him, his eyes even wider, "Do we-" He coughed, "Er... do we, um-"

"Kiss? Yes, Potter, those would be the rules."

Harry nodded, "Right." He leaned back and scratched the back of his neck, "Of course." He muttered, clearing his throat again.

"Oh, for Merlin's sake." Draco sighed, holding either side of Potter's face and pulling him into a sudden kiss.

Potter's gasp was muffled against his lips.

The kiss that was supposed to be a joke just to see Potter's reaction.

The kiss that wasn't supposed to mean anything at all to Draco.

This kiss that was just... still... happening.

He couldn't pull away, Potter had melted into his touch, his arms wrapping around his waist almost instantly.

It was like magic, Draco had no idea when he'd gone from jokingly teasing to oh so many emotions coursing through him all at once.

He wasn't sure he wanted the kiss to ever end.

Potter pulled slightly away for air, "Malfoy?" He whispered, his voice hoarse.

Draco tilted their foreheads together, trying to fight the urge to shove his tongue down Potter's throat to get him to just stop talking.

"We're kind of in the hallway." He mumbled. Draco's eyes shot up over his shoulder, a few of their coworkers stared open-mouthed across the hall from them, unashamed of being caught looking.

Draco cursed under his breath and dragged Potter by his wrist into his office, slamming the door shut behind him and casting locking and silencing charms.

"Is this okay?" He asked, his hand coming up to cup Potter's jaw again.

Potter nodded breathlessly, "Yes."

It was years from then, as they were sitting in the Burrow with the rest of the Weasley's, newley-wed and happier than ever, that Harry confessed winter had been his favorite season ever since.

~~~♤~~~

#drarry #harry potter #draco malfoy #draco x harry #harry x draco #so many feelings #oneshot #winter #christmas #i wrote some words #drarry headcanon #christmas drarry #drarry textpost #drarry hc

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lloydfrontera · 10 months

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wait lmao what I didn't know there was such a skip. I'm sorry this is comedy to me. so you're telling me they have this crazy ass dimension-jumping shenanigans with Javier tearing up as he finally finds Lloyd, his best friend, the most important person in his life, while it's a mutual statement for the both of them, and then we get no dialogue. and skip to Lloyd getting shoved into a hetero romance with no build up. sorry I can't believe this is real. this sounds like a joke and I choose to treat is as such. this is the most hilarious ending and the marriage now feels even more out of place hdufiskaoa9o

OH MY FUCKING GOD RIGHT?!?!?!! it is weird isn't it???? i'm not being crazy for feeling like it's a weird ass choice??? i felt like i was going insane!! i swear to god i felt like i was being gaslighted when i read it!!! there was no way that was the ending!! there was no way that ch 401 ended with one of the most romantic and heartfelt scenes i have ever read and then the next chapter just????? did a time skip where none of that was acknowledged and lloyd was just fucking married off to alicia??? completely off-screen if i may add!

i made a post about it before but i simply need to rant all over again oh my god

general warning for spoilers because i'm about to dissect the entire novel through a llojavi lens

AGAIN. SPOILERS WARNING FOR THE ENDING OF TGED.

i literally cannot express how much of a mid fuck it is when you realize that lloyd and javier's relationship is very much Thee Slowburn of tged. like. this is an indisputable fact. even if you don't think there's anything romantic between them, which, holy fuck that's such a fucking reach one must be really be in denial to not see it but whatever, even then you simply cannot argue that their relationship isn't the most important one in the entire story.

javier is the very first person lloyd talks to in the first chapter. he's the first person that welcomes him into his new life. he's the one he has to work the hardest to endear himself to. he's the one he spends the most time with. he's the one that follows him around literally everywhere he goes.

from the very beginning their relationship is given a special attention that few other things get in the plot.

through the entire story we get constant moments of them getting to know each other as people and getting closer as a result. they're constantly in each other's thoughts, which is very natural as they're in each other's company almost 24/7. it is actually hard to find a chapter where they not talking to each other or at the very least together. i cannot emphasize enough how,,, enmeshed and entangled they are with one another as characters. i mean it when i say they are a set do not separate them.

it takes lloyd 222 chapters to even admit to himself that javier is his friend and that he wants to keep him safe not because he's the protagonist of the story or useful to him or anything like that but simply because he cares for him and doesn't want him to die. because, and i quote, 'he thought he'd always be with javier for the rest of his life. just like now, he thought they'd spend all their time together moving forward. and like they always did, they'd be by each other's side during hard times. happy moments. relaxed days. they'd share all these moments as they exchanged insults and corny jokes, growing old as a lazy lord of a fiefdom and his knight. lloyd always thought so. the thought just came naturally, without much effort from him, much like breathing. lloyd believed that javier would always remain by his side as that was how it had been until now.' (ch222) <- actual textual quote. btw. if you even care.

and then. it takes javier 320 chapters, a hundred chapters more, to realize that he cares about lloyd much more than a knight cares about his lord's son. because he, and once again i quote, 'is [his] true master in [his] heart. lloyd was his friend. and now, javier wanted to protect lloyd. he would sincerely protect him with everything he had.' <- this is, if i may add some context, said as javier is fighting against a goddamn angel, literally heaven's will, to protect lloyd. after figuring out lloyd is a fake. that he's been lying to javier for several years about almost everything including who he is. and yet. this is what javier feels for him.

they are the definition of a slowburn. it takes them this long to even admit they are friends. and this is with us getting to see them together almost every chapter of the way. we get to see every step of the way. we see their relationship develop with all manner of detail.

and then. when you think you cannot get even more dramatic about them. guess what the major conflict of the plot is. guess fucking what the last obstacle for the story to get a happy ending is.

let me set the scene for you:

lloyd has just finished the jewel of truth, the artifact that will get him the answer he seeks on how to stop the restoration of fate, how he can stop destiny from making the original events of the novel come true and destroy everything he has worked and kill everyone he loves. he has javier at his side, who rushed to join him underwater to make sure he was safe and sound while using it, and he can't help but fondly think how lucky he is to have javier, who is loyal and true and has never abandoned him.

a quote of lloyd's thoughts in this scene:

That’s why, you bastard. I’m going to take care of you until the very end. Once I, your wise and older friend, solve the restoration of destiny problem, you’re going to enjoy the rest of your life by my side in peace. [...] He smiled at Javier and thought to himself. You’re my only friend, Javier. I couldn’t have overcome all the obstacles in front of me without your help. So, my trustworthy and reliable comrade, stick with me until I become a lazy lord and you become my personal guard. I hope we will be able to grow old together… -ch 327

as you can see. he's once again planning on spending the rest of his life with javier. canonically. not even an interpretation this is straight up textual i cannot emphasize enough

and then. the jewel of truth gives him the answer. how to stop the restoration of fate. it's very easy. very simple solution in fact.

either lloyd or javier have to die or otherwise vanish from existence.

that's it. there can only be one protagonist in the world and because of everything lloyd has done he's now being acknowledged by fate as the protagonist of the story along with javier. which cannot stand.

so that's the only thing stopping lloyd from getting his happy ending. he just,,, has to either kill his best friend or kill himself.

let me rephrase this from a narrative perspective: the major conflict of the story is now lloyd facing either the choice of letting everything he's achieved and everyone he loves be destroyed. losing his best friend, the person he cares the most about and has been developing an extremely close relationship through the entire plot. or dying himself.

lloyd of course then spends the rest of the plot trying to find a way to avoid having to die. that's literally what the rest of the novel is about. lloyd trying by all means possible seeking a way to not having to die. because at no point, does he ever consider letting javier die in his place even an option. he doesn't want to die of course, but he never saw javier sacrificing himself as the solution to that problem.

the entire conflict of the last part of the novel is lloyd finding a way for him and javier to be able to remain together without either of them having to sacrifice their lives for the other.

he doesn't succeed.

they end up in a battle down in hell where both of them try to give for one another leading to this absolutely delightful parallel

so fucking tasty oh my god i still go crazy when i see this set of illustrations actually

lloyd wins btw. he gets to sacrifice his life for javier. to javier's absolute heartbreak.

but lloyd doesn't die. he does end up stuck in korea tho, a place he would've rather died than go back to, so he has that going on for him. he's back in his goshiwon, absolutely heartbroken and without knowing what to do.

and then we end up with that scene. javier at his doorstep, having crossed dimensions, tearing up as he sees him and tells him how much he's missed him, looking at him with this face:

now. let's pause here. let's take a moment. take in everything i've just explained. everything that has happened to get to this point.

be honest with me. what would you say is the most natural way the story can progress from here.

take into account all that i have recounted and that i skipped so many other things of the same nature so we wouldn't be here all day.

what do you as a reader would expect to happen next

well, i'll tell you:

cut to black we're now an unspecified amount of time later lloyd has already had all the important conversations we've been waiting to see the entire time off screen and is now preparing himself for his wedding to alicia that we will also not get to see by the way

and you know what the funniest thing is. you know what is the cherry on top.

fucking guess who's the last person we see him talk with.

guess who's the person he ends the novel sharing a smile with.

yeah. Yeah.

i really don't know what else to say. i don't know how else to explain how insane this feels. how incredibly dissonant it comes across. i don't want to use the worse gaslighting like this but it's the closest word i can find to describe what it feels like. i feel like i'm being told something is happening when i can see with my own eyes it is not. or rather that i'm seeing something happen and i'm being told that no it is not and that i'm making it up.

i don't know what bk moon was going for. i really don't. especially when this is what he has to say about chapter 401 aka the chapter with javier coming to find lloyd in korea

clearly he feels very strongly about this scene too. it's the one he's been wanting to show the most, he must have analyzed it from every angle possible, must have put special care to get across what he wanted to convey with it.

so why does it feel like the last true chapter of the novel is meant to,,, undercut the feeling of it?? it almost feels as if the last chapter is telling us 'yeah yeah those two are extremely devoted to each other and would and have given their lives for one another and plan on growing old at each other's sides but don't worry :) it's nothing more than them being pals :) just two guys being really good friends :) see, lloyd is even getting married to a woman that's his real happy ending he's not gay or anything :)'

and this is not me saying that two friends cannot be devoted to each other. absolutely not of course friends can love each other platonically and that be more than enough to justify their devotion to one another.

but. it feels weird when the entire novel is dedicated to building up the relationship between lloyd and javier, taking so much time to make us really feel like their relationship is growing at a realistic pace, take almost 3/4 of the novel to even make them come to terms with how much they care for one another, spend actual years following their development,,, and then make lloyd just marry someone else. someone the novel really didn't spend enough time with to justify him developing feels for her.

this is not a diss against alicia i have nothing against her i just don't... buy that lloyd developed romantic feelings for her. much less that he acted on them that easily.

this is a man who took 222 chapters and several years in-universe to even accept that javier, the person he spent all day with, with whom he spoke almost every single day, who he had risked his life for and had been saved by several times at that point, was even his friend.

and now i'm expected to believe he's in love with someone else who, by comparison, he meets a couple of times and spends a little amount of time with.

well. i don't! it's not in character, it wasn't properly built up in the text and truthfully they don't have enough chemistry to make up for it.

i don't know what happened there. i don't know why bk moon decided to add a romance when the novel didn't need it. i don't know why he chose to make it happen between two characters that didn't have a relationship as deep as the one he spent the entire novel building up and promoting as the most important one. which may i add was between his two protagonists. y'know. the ones the novel is supposed to be centered around.

i don't know. i don't know what happened. i don't know if it was censorship, last minute panic, fear of opposition or rejection or actual obliviousness to what he had written looked like, i simply do not know.

i really hope it wasn't homophobia tho that would absolutely suck lmao

but uh. yeah. i do think the ending is very funny when you put it like that askhdsjkfds

#hey i got an ask #Anonymous #tged #the greatest estate developer #tged spoilers #lloyd frontera #llojavi #javier asrahan #long post #i don't what happened i started typing and suddenly all of this came out of me #i was possessed #most of what i said here i have said before but it's now all in one post #and i have So Much left to say about this topic but i really cannot make this post longer i am so embarrassed already aksjdhk #i feel a little hollow i need to shitpost to get back to normal oh my god #this is. why it takes me so long to answer asks btw. i literally cannot shut up.#i apologize but i cannot promise to change

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jorindasfate · 10 months

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Beauty culture is driving me insane. I'm bombarded with videos from those tiktok plastic surgeons and influencers showing their before/after botox. It's always the same excuse "there's nothing wrong with having forehead wrinkles! but mine made me look much older than I am so I got it fixed! I'm so happy with the result! Love yourselves!"

I acknowledge the effort made to not seem like you're insulting people with forehead wrinkles but it is very bleak. To me it seems like a cheap way of dodging criticism. "This is for me! I never said that other people should get rid of their forehead wrinkles!" Do you not realise the implications of your videos? A stated "flaw" in appearance is never limited to one person! I know and emphasize deeply with judging one's own appearance harsher than you would judge other people's, but then (respectfully) you have to shut the fuck up about it. Other people see what you're saying about yourself, and those comments will be echoing in their head the next time they look in a mirror.

Either admit your fucked up views on how women are lesser for visibly ageing or having laugh lines and crow's feet and need to get it "fixed" OR acknowledge to yourself that this is Your problem, Your insecurity, and stay quiet. Do not post about how happy you are about getting rid of your facial "flaw" on social media, unless you are deliberately encouraging others to do the same thing (in which case, I hope you rot).

Because for every post like that, there is a 12 year old girl reading it and accepting that this is what the future has in store for her. That she needs to start an anti ageing process before she's fully grown, that she has to stay vigilant of every line appearing on her face and that her natural appearance will never be enough.

Stop pretending like your actions aren't influenced by others and stop pretending that your actions don't influence others! You are not getting out of this blameless by writing a bleak disclaimer!

#anti beauty industry #anti botox #anti makeup

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quirkthieves · 2 months

Note

You say not a hill worth dying on but maybe you should post receipts on people on your DNI. To protect others from them.

weird how similar this is to the shit i got in May. starting to have my suspicions but i wont say nothing cuz i dont say nothing without backing it up

Anyways, I'll repeat myself again, in the clearest language possible, avoiding sarcasm or insults, so that we can all be on the same page. Sound good?

A DNI is not a callout. It's simply not. A callout is (and I will be speaking from what it "should" be, since I'm aware this is often not how it is carried out in real life) a post/other publicly curated list of grievances, ideally with evidence and analysis of that evidence and the context of that evidence that proves the point attempting to be made. A callout should be made for the sake of public interest, whether that be because of the subject matter, number of people involved, continued duration of behavior, et cetera. Callouts used for petty personal business are what I like to call "this could have been a dm", and I'm not interested in them. I'm not perfect. I'll admit, in the past, especially when I was 15-16, I was involved with people who went out of their way to take things in bad faith, but I do make an effort to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and exercise discretion in conflict.

A DNI is exactly what the acronym stands for: a "Do Not Interact". People have plenty of reasons to not want interact with someone. Sure, lots of people have been put on DNIs because of callouts, but it's putting the cart before the horse to try and flip the cause and effect, or to ignore the other reasons (like, for example, personal falling outs that had a lot of feelings involved, but aren't malicious or big enough to be a matter of public interest) that people may be put on one. I've seen "DNI if your name is [xyz]" because of someone's personal boundaries. I can respect that, and I don't need them to justify anything to me.

Now, when it comes to my DNI, I will say this: I have people on there that did heinous shit, and I have people there that are matters of personal falling-outs. I have been very diligent in emphasizing that them being on the same list is NOT me conflating our conflicts as all being on the same level. I expect people to give me the same good faith I give them: an understanding that these things have nuance and that if they want a clearer picture they are free to ask. I've even had people message me in the past like "hey, is it okay if I interact, I'm [nuanced reasoning here]" and I both appreciate the honesty and am willing to work with people because things are complicated.

And that means I have a couple reasons for not "adding receipts".

In the case of individuals like Myers, the content in question is incredibly graphic. And there's a lot of it. I don't want to expose people to 100+ pages of violently upsetting material when they're just trying to read my blog rules. It's not the appropriate time or place to do so. Furthermore, the Myers situation was incredibly public. Keeping it taped up on my door would just drag out bad memories for everyone.

Similarly to above, for Myers and certain other individuals, those situations involved something traumatic happening to me as part of that situation. I've said before that I'm a fairly private person when it comes to things like that, and I don't owe anyone the performance of my suffering when I have no control over who can view it.

For situations that weren't insanely traumatic, I don't think receipts are necessary. I've said before-- I don't believe in meddling in people's relationships. Telling, hypothetically, "everyone" about the personal arguments I had with someone feels like going out of my way to point and be like "see? aren't they a bitch!!!" when it's really not necessary. I know that there may also be context or changes behind the scenes I've not been aware of because I don't speak to them. I think our respective mutuals can be trusted to make a reasonable, educated decision about the friend circles they want to curate, and I entirely understand that people have the right to "choose" the other person over me. I'm happy that people can have close friendships! Yes, a lot of those had to do with issues I had as a matter of MORALS, but I'm not all-seeing and all-knowing. Just because I took issues with someone because of my strongly held beliefs does not mean I think of them as a danger to other people. One has to practice discretion.

A DNI is simply about signalling that for whatever reason, people who meet certain criteria aren't going to find your personal space as a welcoming one. Clearly, in this latest situation, Ire thought that me being friendly and trying to engage for the sake of not excluding them in the server was weird and crossing a line-- so I don't know why me saying that I don't want their close friends in my friend circle is so offensive. We don't get along, I don't know why they would want their friends to be particularly close to me either. And that's their right! I'm not mad or offended if anyone decides they would be uncomfortable being around someone they don't get along with and don't like for whatever reason, and I'm not mad at people who see that and decide that they value their relationship with the other person over the one they have with me. Does it hurt my feelings sometimes? Sure, yeah. I'm a person too. Do I not understand it sometimes? Absolutely. But they are allowed to do that, and I won't begrudge them for it. If they don't like me, I don't... want them to be in my space, either? Having "more friends" isn't worth it if they're miserable being around me. I'd rather they just be upfront and say they do not want to continue our friendship.

Just because a person was bad to me or a bad fit FOR me does not mean they will not or are incapable of having healthy, positive, productive relationships with other people. I want to respect those and I'm happy for them. I just don't want it in my personal space, and when we do end up in a mutual space, I'm willing to be cordial for the sake of not jeopardizing the relationships they have with our mutual acquaintances. That does not mean I want to be friends. I just do not want to be cruel and drag personal mess. If I thought they were dangerous to that mutual friend, I'd say something in private, but otherwise, I'm willing to remove myself first (especially if they have seniority!)

I'm frustrated that I keep having to say this over and over again. And I'm frustrated that my attempts to stick by what I believe in is constantly skewed and seen in the worst faith possible, and that no matter the effort, people are always going to see me as a "nosy-ass tweaker" who "ruined the rpc" or an "attack dog" or any other of names I've been called over the years, just because I can be abrasive or sarcastic or hyperbolic. I'm willing to admit that I don't always do myself favors with how my tone comes across in text, and I'm starting to realize that sometimes anger is the only language I know how to express myself with, and I don't like showing my belly to people, especially publicly. But I have feelings too, you know? I get sad, or anxious, or tired, or any other number of things. And it makes me sad to put in so much effort trying to keep my blows from getting too low even with someone I don't like and not even have those efforts acknowledged or reciprocated.

I defended someone on my DNI in may (alex). Just because I have issues with someone, even if they're serious, does not mean I'm going to act negligently and publish or spread serious accusations that I have no evidence or context for, and I'll tell other people to do the same. I even reached out to let them know those things were being said, because I feel that when it's that serious, they have a right to know so they don't get blindsided by rumors. If someone came into my askbox saying Ire murdered puppies, I'd do the same. I've done it before with other people, I'll continue to do it, but it would be nice to have someone acknowledge that sometimes.

Anyway, my answer to that question is : nah. dun feel like it

#pure mustelid crazy://ooc #long post but im not cutting it we're all getting our reading in!

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15-lizards · 10 months

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I love your genderbent series, what would characters in the dance of the dragons be like genderbent? Eg. Rhaenyra, Daemon, Velaryon brothers (Jacerys, Lucerys, Joffrey) the Green siblings (Aegon II, Helaena etc) the DoTD would probably never happen if Rhaenyra was a man, but I’m still interested in this AU.

Honestly you can still flip it to make the dance happen, it would just be that male Alicent would try to push fem Aegon over male Rhae by convincing fem Viserys that there should be another queen instead of a king, so that female succession is strengthened after the shenanigans of the Great Council

Queen Visenya, who was named so by a slim margin during the Great Council, instead of her cousin Rhaeon, and set the precedent of firstborn succession, no matter the gender. Had only one child, her son and heir Rhaenar, before her husband Aemon died. Took a liking to the young son of her Hand, Alren Hightower, who was then forced to marry the much older queen. To everyone’s surprise, Visenya then had four more children despite her advancing age. Alren, wanting to secure his children’s futures, tried to convince Visenya of naming their eldest daughter Aegora as heir, to strengthen the idea that a daughter can succeed. He was close to Rhaenar in their youth, but the years drove them apart and made him paranoid that his children would not be safe if Rhaenar succeeded his mother.

Rhaenar, who had been groomed for the throne ever since he was born, is of course still The Realms Delight. Confident and proud but a bit indulgent at times, there are some rumors surrounding the mysterious circumstances of his daughters’ births, mainly the fact that every time his lady wife Laenara is said to be pregnant, she disappears to Dragonstone for the duration, and Rhaenar’s sworn shield, Harla Strong, always accompanies her. For his second wife, he wastes no time in choosing Daemona, the Princess of Flea Bottom. Visenya’s wild and reckless younger sister, she enjoyed starting conflicts and ending them (with her sword of course). And she always got what she wanted. Not even her queenly sister could stop her, and once Daemona’s Royce husband dies mysteriously, she goes right back to chasing her spoiled little nephew.

And ofc Alren’s darling mentally ill children: Aegora, Haelen, and Aemona. Usurper Queen Aegora who didn’t even want to be here, much less be on the throne. Lazy and indulgent with no desire to rule, she was more than happy to let Rhaenar have the throne, until her father put her there instead. However, she doesn’t give it up, letting her father convince her that Rhaenar will kill her, given the chance. Haelen, Aegora’s poor sad husband whose mind constantly seems to be elsewhere. He’s a strange boy, preferring to read the works of mystics instead of riding his dragon, but he’s still a sweet boy who loves his children dearly. And then Aemona (just pretend Anya has an eyepatch) my favorite insane second son-daughter. Sharper and more ambitious than her siblings, her father’s favorite child and constantly seeking his approval. Leads most of the war effort herself.

And then of course Crown Princess Jaecera, Lucera, and Johanna. Big sister Jaecera already trying to model herself in a queenly fashion, but has quite a bit of both her mother and fathers temper and headstrong tendencies. Always means the best though. Literally so eager to go to war just to avenge her little sister. Daddy’s girl Lucera just the sweetest and kindest baby ever except that one time she jumped Aemona with a rock when they were younger. Refuses to let an insult against her family slide so hard that she walks into Storms End knowing Vhagars old ass is there. And then Johanna whose kinda Rickon coded to me (aka she doesn’t do much)

#asoiaf #like I feel like this could still work #just switch around a couple of dynamics

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webanglikethat · 7 months

Text

ABOUT PUNZ

TW // RACISM, DUB CON, ED, INVALIDATION OF MENTAL ILLNESSES

! Andi talks about her year-long relationship with Punz and she recounts enduring emotional neglect, gaslighting, verbal abuse, and a troubling instance of dubious consent. the relationship began with Andi facing harassment from Punz's fanbase, leading to the decision to keep their relationship private for Punz's benefit rather than genuine concern for Andi's well-being.

! Punz's racist remarks, mockery of Andi's accent, and reluctance to visit Andi's family in Puerto Rico contributed to feelings of inferiority and insecurity. He called a slur and said “oh you’re my little b3an3r”. He also said - while watching Bridgerton - that the sharma sisters weren’t attractive because of their dark skins.

! Punz made Andi feel embarrassed and insignificant, refusing to associate with her publicly and belittling her in private CONSTANTLY. He knew she had BPD and he even promise her MOM he would take care of her but he constantly dismissed her depressive episodes and made her feel like she was the problem. He said she did it so she would get his attention.

! His berating behavior and insults exacerbated her feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness obviously and additionally, he exhibited a very very controlling behavior, dictating changes to Andi's personality and content to appease his own freaking audience. “There were also some smaller things like the fact that he made me feel really guilty whenever he would spend money on me.”

! Andi also describes instances of body shaming regarding her eating habits, and criticism of her interests and appearance. “For context, i used to suffer from an eating disorder. I was anorexic and had a really unhealthy relationship with food during high school and my first year of uni. […] So i had certain comfort foods that, while sometimes unhealthy, at least it was something to eat when i didn’t feel like eating anything. He knew this. Yet, whenever i would crave some of these foods he would call me fat”

! he also had a consistent lack of effort and empathy towards Andi. he never took the initiative to plan dates, leaving Andi feeling unappreciated and longing for romantic gestures like receiving flowers, which he only did once, despite her PLEAS. he also exhibited disrespectful behavior towards Andi in front of his friends, using her as a source of amusement to elevate his own image “For example, once when i was showering, i overheard him on a discord call with George and Sapnap and i heard George say “if you don’t go in the shower and have sex with Andi, i will”. Once, when i was really struggling with my legs”

! when Andi was experiencing severe physical pain due to undiagnosed arthritis, didnt care and he initially refused to take her to the emergency room, prioritizing his own comfort and streaming schedule over her health. he said he wanted to stream while his gf was in pain. insane. and even after relenting and accompanying her to the ER, Punz complained about the inconvenience she was.

! the relationship ended on one-year anniversary, where Andi blacked out after consuming alcohol provided by Punz, leading to an encounter that she can’t fully recall. she gets drunk very easily and when she woke up, she was naked and he was joking about it. “Then he mentioned that i fell off the bed at some point in the night and that it was funny how drunk I was. I then questioned him. Because if he thought that me tripping and falling off the bed because i was so drunk was funny, how did he not know that i was too drunk? “ to this day she doesn’t know what happened that night

! after the breakup, Andi confided in Punz's friend about the incident on their anniversary. however, instead of offering support, the friend warned her to like be cautious about discussing it, suggesting that speaking out could have consequences. he basically said she shouldn’t imply she didn’t remember the sexual encounter because it would mean its rape. and when Andi sought validation from other friends, they downplayed the seriousness of the situation, suggesting that Punz couldn't be blamed for not realizing how drunk Andi was.

IN THE OLD POST SHE TWEETED:

she described her relationship with Punz as complicated and tumultuous from the start. they initially became friends due to shared social circles, and their friendship gradually developed into romantic feelings, although Andi suspected that Punz might not have reciprocated her emotions fully. despite this, they began dating, but Andi felt like she was constantly begging for Punz's attention and affection. she noticed that Punz seemed disinterested and distracted when they were together, which led her to feel neglected and invisible in the relationship.

! One very significant source of tension was Andi's friendship with another guy, whom she considered one of her closest friends. She had a lot of guy friends btw and Punz was jealous and disapproval of this friendship, which lead Andi to eventually cut off contact with her friend in an attempt to salvage her relationship with Punz. “i basically felt invisible to him. that is, when i wasn’t hanging out with my guy friends.”

! Punz abruptly broke up with Andi via text. Despite the breakup, they continued to engage in behaviors typical of a relationship, although without the commitment. So basically they were friends but doing couple stuff. when one of Punz's friends showed interest in Andi, Punz reacted with jealousy and ended their "friendship" over it. “his friend and i talked about it and poked fun at the fact that he broke up with me but got mad at someone else paying attention to me. when 1 saw this (he ended up forcing me to show him the screenshots of the conversation) he was even more pissed and even more done with me. the next day he called me and we were basically back together again.”

! during their “reconciliation”, Punz made Andi feel like she had to EARN his affection because of something he deemed unforgivable that /she/ had done. as a result, Punz treated her poorly, often canceling plans to hang out with friends and only seeing her late at nigh and Andi basically felt at Punz's mercy, with their interactions and plans dictated solely by his whims.

! this treatment took a severe toll on Andi's mental health, leading her into a deep depression and causing her to relapse into SH after three years of being clean. despite seeking therapy and making efforts to address her mental health, Punz dismissed her struggles and saw them as just another problem in their relationship. when they argued, which was frequent, Punz would use Andi's mental health against her, belittling her and making her feel guilty for her emotions.

! Punz would also dismiss Andi's emotional needs, labeling her as needy and clingy whenever she sought reassurance or expressed her desires. instead of providing comfort, Punz would respond with indifference or hostility.

! He broke promises, he would go against his commitments, such as going to Las Vegas with friends on her birthday after promising not to. Andi also noticed Punz looking at “provocative” pictures of other girls on social media.

! “but there was a long period of time in our relationship where we had zero intimacy, and it wasn’t because of me. this fucked with my head a lot because i had this idea that because i was so emotional and needy that i could compensate physically. but when that stopped, my thoughts looked something like “the only thing i was useful for was sex and now he doesn’t even want that from me”

! She also thinks he was cheating on her during that time.

! after their breakup, Punz said he wanted to improve himself and the relationship, promising to go to the gym, consider therapy, adopt a healthier lifestyle, and plan dates to treat Andi better. However, Andi had reached her limit and no longer believed in Punz's ability to change.

! Punz shifted blame onto Andi, making her feel responsible for his lack of effort and dissatisfaction in the relationship. He would victimize himself and bring up past mistakes, such as Andi flirting with one of his friends, to deflect from his own shortcomings.

! It took therapy for her to realize that Punz was not genuinely interested in her and only valued her attention when it suited him. And despite claiming not to want her, Punz would become possessive when others showed interest in Andi “he didn’t want me but he didn’t want anyone else to have me and that was the bottom line. that was the base off all the problems and toxicity that happened while we were together. “

#Punz #andi #fuck punz #TW SA #TW RACISM

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