#Wild Rose & Sparrow

[razorblade180]

Sunny Side

Whitley:Ruby. Wake up. *shakes her*

Ruby:Mmm, where’s the fire? It’s like five in the morning.

Whitley:It’s strawberry season in Patch.

Ruby:I am aware….

Whitley:Let’s gets some fresh fruit in breakfast. You can sleep on the airship.

Ruby:Okay- wha?

[The airship]

Ruby, half awake:….*looks to the right*

Winter: *listening to music*

Sparrow:I bet I can fly this.

Penny:Sir, please sit down. I already have a co-pilot.

Oscar:That is- he is a literal retired soldier.

Jaune and Weiss:*reading*

Nick and Summer:Zzzz

Ruby:Uncle Qrow?

Qrow:*playing cards* Yeah?

Ruby:We married rich.

Qrow:Is that sinking in now?

Ruby:Little bit.

Nora:And we’re reaping the benefits.

Ren:Whitley just didn’t want to feel your anger about a breakfast trip.

Valerie:*writing* I’m not complaining. My book report wasn’t finished.

Ruby:…Baaaaabe?

Whitley:What’s up sleepyhead.

Ruby:Can we make a detour?

xxxxxxx

Bzzz bzzz b-

Yang:*grabs scroll* Uuuuggh. Where’s the fire?

Ruby:Look outside bitch.

Yang rolls out of bed and practically crawls to her window where Blake is staring to see a fancy airship hovering near her house.

Ruby:Grab your pants, wife, and child. We’re gonna make mom’s pancakes.

Yang:….Sure.

xxxxxx

Whitley:Welcome to the breakfast express.

Yang:You need less money.

Blake:I bought some honey, syrup, and spices my mom made.

Whitley:This is why you’re my favorite member.

Ruby and Weiss:Wow that’s craaazy.

Veronica casually walks on board in her pjs and heads straight towards the twins without a second thought. She picks up a sleepy Summer that leans on her brother and moves her one seat down, then sits down. She tugs Summer so she falls back in place, offering her own right arm as a substitute while resting her head on Nick before promptly going back to sleep.

Yang:…At least she was nice about it.

xxxxxx

Knock Knock Knock

Tai:*opens door* ….Strawberry picking?

Yang and Ruby:Hehe, yeah.

Tai:I’ll go grab your old baskets.

xxxxxxx

Nick was used to the rich life, but even had to admit it was pretty surreal to be at home in the cold one moment, then woken up a few hours later to put on a sunhat and pick some berries. Everyone this morning was just…cool with it. This was life right now. Singing early birds and strawberry baskets.

Nick:Wasn’t there school today?

Summer:Don’t be lame and keep picking. Gods it smells nice out here. I’m a little jealous we don’t come here more often.

Valerie:The sun has barely risen and yet it’s so warm.

Veronica:Country air smells different from the sea or city life. I visit Gramps occasionally and even I’m not used to it. It’s pretty jarring.

Summer:Kinda like waking up in a different plane seat.

Veronica:If that’s what you want to compare it too.

Summer:Don’t sweep that under the rug!!!

xxxxx

Ruby:Pancakes 🎶

Yang:Whoop whoop🎶

Weiss:Pancakes 🎶

Winter.Whoop Whoop🎶

Nora:Pancakes pancakes pancakes pancakes🎶

Ren:Buttermilk, Strawberry, shortcake, or tall!🎶

Jaune:You already know I’m eating them all!🎶

Qrow :Crack a few eggs and hash a few browns!🎶

Tai:Put em on my plate and I’m gonna chow down!🎶

Penny:Grab a plate and some friends to tag along…🎶

Everyone:Took making cooking fun with the breakfast song!🎶

All the kids slowly set the table as they watched the grown ups cut up fruit, flip pancakes, pour drinks, and butter pans.

Veronica:You’re not gonna sing?

Blake:There are enough people in that kitchen.

Oscar:Yeah satisfied fixing chairs.

Whitley:*sitting* Zzzz

Sparrow:This guy planned everything and now decides to sleep!? *pokes face*

Ruby:Leave him alone!

Sparrow:Did she even turn around?

Oscar:Did she really need to with you?

xxxxxx

It took about half an hour before the smell of breakfast was rich enough to wake Whitley just in time. Now it was his who was wide awake as she happily carried trays in hand alongside Yang, Weiss, and Penny; they happily danced side to side in messy aprons as they put food on the table for everyone. Nora would’ve joined if she could be trusted, and Winter was happily on Nora restraint duty.

Stacks of strawberry pancakes in the shape of roses and buttermilk pancakes in the form of the sun were presented with hash browns, eggs, sausage, biscuits, ham, the whole spread and additional goodies for everyone to eat. They took their seat and looked at Whitley as if he wanted to make some grand speech.

Whitley:*smiles* You waiting for an invitation? *raises glass* To a good day.

Everyone:To a good day!

Not a moment was wasted passing around plates. Whitley went to grab a fork when his empty plate was suddenly replaced with a full breakfast by Ruby. The lady quickly cut a piece of the pancake drizzled in cinnamon syrup and raised to his face to make him blush.

Ruby:Thank you for the trip. Now say aaah~

Whitley:I-In front of everyone?

Ruby:Don’t be shy now. It’s just for the first bite. It’s tradition here. Then you give me a bite.

Qrow:If your sister can do it, you can too.

Winter:*chews shamefully*

They look at Weiss to see her eat off of Jaune’s fork without hesitation. She even opens her mouth again to receive another bite before giggling. Meanwhile the likes of Penny, Nora, and Blake, treated this like an everyday occurrence. With a display like that, Whitley had no choice but to summon the courage to say “aah” and get fed a bite.

Ruby:How is it!?

Whitley:…I can go for another.

[ethereal-drivel]

selkie has officially just used AI for one of their prints (which doesn’t surprise me cuz the founder has been using it in advertisements for a few months) and kinda full offense why is that brand So expensive. everyone whose been candid about them is that the fabric is cheap, the craftsmanship is wack and now the prints are completely Not made by any artist. and like don’t come for me with a “but it’s a small batch brand 🥺” they come out with a new release of half a dozen designs every like three weeks. and no i can’t afford it and that’s part of my beef lmao

[thefatgirloffashion]

Wild Rose & Sparrow SS24 Collection

This post gives details on Wild Rose & Sparrow SS24 Collection – Paris Fashion Week.  See the show.  What I did and wore.  Keep reading for all the details.   thefatgirloffashion aroundthewaygyrl sweatinmascara Continue reading Untitled

[lavandulawrites]

Our Little Haven

Yandere Fyodor x reader

MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT

Fyodor is my absolute favourite character. He is so interesting and there are endless possibilities with him.

Masterlist

Synopsis: Life with Fyodor is peaceful and absolutely perfect, but something is missing…

Warnings: NSFW, brainwashing, subtle manipulation, reader has small flashbacks, female reader

Word count: 1474

The sun shinned through the white lace curtains. The wind that swept through the opening in the window making the curtains dance. The sun beam on the wooden floor warm to the touch as you stood with bare feet glancing out the window. The grass in the garden tall and green. The wild flowers making the landscape fairytale like.

A lone sparrow landed on the branch by the window. It’s little beak picked on the apple hanging above it. It made eye contact with you and chirped. You could feel your hand reaching towards it.

Longing.

You snapped out of your trance at the sound of the door to kitchen opening. The old door creaked. In stepped the master of the house. A black haired man with boundless purple eyes that quickly found yours. His lips pulled back into a smile. His black eye lashes fluttered, as his eyes crinkled.

“I see you have gotten a new friend” his melodic voice so very pleasant. He nodded towards the little sparrow as it was happily eating away on the apple.

You smiled slightly as you gazed at the little bird. “Yeah… I suppose I have.”

He hummed as he stepped closer. Cold hands wrapped around your waist as his head rested on your shoulder. His nose nuzzled against your neck. His soft raven hair tickled you. “You haven’t eaten anything. Where you waiting for me my dear?” he raised his head and kissed your cheek.

You nodded.

He spun you around and cupped your face and kissed your lips tenderly. “I appreciate you waiting for me love. It makes me happy” his face soft as he kissed you.

The library in the manor was quite and filled to the brim with books. Some were new and some were as ancient as time. The air filled with a homely smell which were soothing. The tall windows overlooking the garden, making the room lit. You could see the little pound and the ducks swimming among the waterlilies.

You let your hand run over the many books as you decided on what to read. Your hand stopped at a leather bound tome. On its spine it read World History. You removed the book from the shelf, its weight downing your hands. You blew off the dust and took a seat on the velvety rococo couch. You opened it carefully and flipped through the pages.

Multiple of the pages were elegantly annotated. Some of the notes were in Russian and some in Latin. The annotations were many and they were sometimes random. As you flipped through the tome your mind wandered to Fyodor.

You knew of his age and the nature of his ability. When he first had told you, you did not believe him. You found it peculiar that he had trusted you with his secret. After you confronted him, he had only laughed and said “One does not hide anything from one’s loved ones, don’t you agree?”.

His answer had stunned you at first, but you had to agree with him.

You often wondered about what he had seen and what he had experienced. He had told you some details about his past, but not enough. You always craved more. You sighed and placed the tome onto the mahogany table. You leans you head back against the back rest. The ceiling was high and your eyes wandered towards the ceiling rose surrounding the chandelier. Fyodor’s tastes were really exquisite.

“I see you have taken an interest in history, my dear” a deep voice woke you up. You blinked confused and your eyes wandered to the tall man who was examining the tome.

You sat up. “I didn’t mean to go thr-”

“It’s okay” he patted your head. “Lovers should not have any secrets. Do you not agree?” he smiled gently.

You swallowed and nodded. “Yeah.. That’s true”

Fyodor glanced out the window, taking in the beautiful view. “Are you not glad you moved her with me? Away from all the noise… and distractions” he hummed. You could see him glancing at you in out of the corner of his eyes.

“It’s really peaceful here” you smiled.

He turned his head to face you. He hummed in agreement, his voice like butter. “This is our safe haven. Our own little heaven” he leaned down and gently stroked your cheek.

You closed your eyes and leaned into his hand. The coldness of his skin welcoming in the summer heat. His other hand intertwined in your soft hair. Your eyes fluttered open and were met with a playful smile.

The black haired man leaned in and gently kissed your lips. His lips softer than velvet and you wanted more. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pressed your lips together in a fierce kiss. He chuckled against your lips before he licked them. His tongue pushed against them, asking for permission. You gladly accepted. His tongue exploring your mouth and you moaned out in pleasure.

He crawled on top of you and deepened the kiss. His lips hungry and it felt like he devoured you. The gentle Fyodor was completely gone and replaced by a man lost to desperation. You gently pulled his hair and he groaned against your lips.

He parted from your lips and kissed his way to your neck. He sucked and licked on the skin causing you to see stars. His hand lifted up your dress and pulled your lace panties down. You had no idea where he had thrown your panties, but you couldn’t care less.

His long fingers quickly found your cunt and prodded your lips apart. His fingers moved with such skill you thought that this was what he was born to do. Your slick quickly soaking his fingers and he grinned at the sight. “God you are so beautiful like this my love” he sighed softly.

He pulled his fingers out of your cunt and liked them clean. You was disappointed by the emptiness only to become completely in awe by the sight of him licking his fingers clean.

He grinned at your reaction and leaned over you again and pulled your dress over your head. Your white lace bra catching his attention. He smirked as he toyed with the bow in the middle of the bra. “I’m glad you like my gifts.”

Fyodor snaked his arms underneath your back and clasped your bra open. The bra fell on the floor as he quickly dived down to capture your lips. As he kissed you his hands quickly pulled down his fly. He separated from your lips and took both his pants and boxers off. His cock hard and made your mouth water. He quickly slipped his shirt over his head.

He lined himself against your entrance and showed himself in without warning. You moaned loudly at the heavenly sensation. His movements fast and his dick hitting just right.

He looked down at you with suck lovingly eyes you felt a tug at your heart. His hair had fallen down from his shoulder and softly framed his face. The sun rays catching his hair making it shin like the feathers of the ravens that resided in your garden. Your gaze fell down to his lips and to the red stains of your lipstick. The colour was deep and beautiful. Images of that very colour filled your mind accompanied with screams of terrors.

Your eyes widened and you blinked furiously to get rid of the images.

Fyodor slowed down his movements. His dark eyebrows furrowed. “Are you alright darling?” his voice filled with worry. His movements had completely stopped.

You swallowed and nodded. “Yeah. Please continue” you smiled up at him.

He nodded and continued trusting into you. You pulled him down into an embrace. The ceiling was filled with various colours from the sunset. Reds, yellows and pinks filled your vision.

The familiar feeling in the bottom of your stomach made you moan. You kissed him deeply as you climaxed. He followed soon after and pulled out and painted your stomach white.

As you both laid together on the couch your mind wandered. You couldn’t stop the many images of what seemed like your past flicker across your eyes. The sound of people laughing soon turned into screams and your vision turned to red. You turned to face the sleeping man besides you. His long lashes shadowed over his high cheekbones. You couldn’t shake off the feeling that he had something to do with your sudden images.

You laid there awake lost in thoughts for what felt like forever. Maybe it was the best not to think about it. It would only cause you distress and as your lover said , it was not good for you. Listen to Fyodor and all will turn well you said to yourself as you drifted asleep.

[herballwitch]

Altars For The Greek Gods

Hello, My name is Alva Tauri! I am an herbalist, spirit worker, tarot and oracle reader, and lunar and herbal witch dedicated to closing the education gap when it comes to herbalism and witch practices!

Today, I wanted to talk about ways in which I connect with the Gods and deities I worship in my life via my altar, as well as some of those Greek gods that I do not have a direct connection with to help those who are just starting!

NOTE: I did already say this above but I am going to say it again, I only work with (as far as Greek gods go) Hades, Apollo, and Dionysus. However, I have been working with spirits, Gods, and deities for nine years now, so the information found in this post will be a compilation of everything I have learned in those nine years from my own experiences and the experiences of friends. If you have any information you feel should be added to this post please feel free to message me!

With that being said, let's get into altar work with Greek gods...

ARES

Ares is the God of war and the spirit of battle and was typically associated with:

ANIMALS: eagle owl, barn owl, poisonous snakes, boar, vulture

COLORS: red and purple

CRYSTALS: bloodstone, garnet, red jasper, smokey quartz, black tourmaline, hematite, metals, obsidian, carnelian

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): spicy things, chocolate, basil, cinnamon, weapons

ARTEMIS

Artemis was the goddess of chastity, hunting, and the moon. She is often associated with:

ANIMALS: deer, wolf, wild boar, hunting dogs

COLORS: white, blue, black, brown and green

CRYSTALS: morganite, moonstone, celestite, moss/tree agate, amethyst

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): anything moon shaped, frankincense, cypress, mugwort, amaranth

APHRODITE

Aphrodite is the ancient Greek goddess of sexual love and beauty. She is typically associate with:

ANIMALS: swan, dove, sparrow

COLORS: red and pink for love/sexuality. white and blue, and gold.

CRYSTALS: rose quartz, pearl, opal, aquamarine, rhodonite, ocean jasper, moonstone

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): roses, chocolate, shells, myrrh, gold

APOLLO

Apollo is the God of archery, music and dance, truth and prophecy, healing and diseases and, mostly commonly known as, the God of the Sun. He is commonly associated with:

ANIMALS: deer, hawk, crow/raven, cicada, swan, bees, wolf, fox

COLORS: yellow, white, red, orange. purple and green for the Oracle.

CRYSTALS: sunstone, amber, calcite (specifically honey and yellow), citrine, sapphire

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): sun shaped anything, bay leaves, laurel, cypress, playing music (especially the lyre), poetry

ATHENA

Athena was the goddess of wisdom, war, and the crafts and is normally associated with:

ANIMALS: snakes and owls

COLORS: white, grey/silver, red

CRYSTALS: metals, celestite, fluorite, bloodstone, obsidian, iolite, azurite, and lapis lazuli

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): anything to do with olives, snake shed, cedar, cypress, cinnamon, weapons

DEMETER

Demeter is the goddess of the harvest, grains, and agriculture. She is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: serpent, farm animals (especially pig), lizards, turtle-dove, crane, owl

COLORS: green, brown, yellow, and black

CRYSTALS: jade, tree/moss agate, carnelian, amber, aventurine, rutilated quartz, pyrope, and almandine

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): oats and grain, anything baked, flowers, spices (like cinnamon or cloves, allspice is good too), leaves that have begun to change colors for fall, mint, poppy

DIONYSUS

Dionysus is the God of wine, pleasure, and festivity and he is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: panther/leopard, tiger, bull, serpent

COLORS: purple and green for association with grapes/wine, leopard/tiger print for his holy animals

CRYSTALS: amethyst is largely associated with Dionysus, as well as grape agate, garnet, and rose or rutilated quartz

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): grapes (or any derivative), alcohol, cinnamon, ivy, pinecones, playing music, partying, sex/masturbation

HADES

Hades is the God of the underworld. However, Hades also rules over wealth and finances. He is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: naturally, dogs are frequently associated with Hades, as well as owls, sheep, and cattle

COLORS: black, red, and white are typically used in association with death. purple and metallics are used in association with riches/wealth

CRYSTALS: hematite, onyx, black crystals (like obsidian), jet

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): narcissus, mint, asphodel, white poplar, pomegranate, coffee, cinnamon, elm, money, chocolate, keys, shells

HEPHAESTUS

Hephaestus is the Greek god of fire, volcanoes, blacksmithing, and metalworking. He is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: donkey, dog, crane

COLORS: red, orange, and yellow, metallics.

CRYSTALS: metals, fire opal, honey calcite, smoky quartz, black quartz, rock crystal, amethyst, chloritized quartz, and rutilated quartz

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): spicy things, hot beverages, anything handmade (especially if made by you), dragon's blood incense, seashells, anything on fire

HERA

Hera is the goddess of women, marriage, and childbirth and is frequently associated with:

ANIMALS: peacock, cuckoo, cow

COLORS: red, pink and white for association with love and marriage. gold because she's the Queen of the Gods.

CRYSTALS: pearls, diamonds, topaz, opal, moonstone, malachite, tourmalinated quartz

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS: iris, rose, patchouli, coconut, cypress, maple, peacock feathers, pomegranate

HERMES

Hermes is the messenger of the gods and the mediator between the realm of the dead and the kingdom of the living. He is commonly associated with:

ANIMALS: tortoise, ram, goat, hawk, pig

COLORS: green, red, gold, white and brown

CRYSTALS: theres actually not a lot of evidance that crystals and stones were used in the past for altar work for Hermes. however citrine, alexandrite, and tigers eye are used frequently today

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): money, crocus/saffron, strawberries

HESTIA

Hestia is the goddess of the hearth, home, and hospitality. She is normally associated with:

ANIMALS: donkey, pig, crane, cow

COLORS: red, orange, and yellow, brown or white

CRYSTALS: amber, jade, red garnet, ruby, sunstone, amethyst, honey calcite

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): tea/coffee (drink with her), pine, bread, cider, apples, anything on fire, cinnamon, anything that feels like home to you

PERSEPHONE

Persephone is the goddess of the dead and queen of the underworld in ancient Greek religion and myth and is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: deer and ram

COLORS: purple, pink, yellow, green - any spring colors. (Hades colors can be used as well)

CRYSTALS: the garnet is the most commonly associated with Persephone, but amethyst, moss/tree agate, milk quartz, and jade can also be used

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): pomegranate, flowers, grains, lavender, rosemary, Spring

POSEIDEN

Poseidon is the god of the sea, earthquakes, horses, and water. He is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: horse, bull, dolphin, hippocampus

COLORS: blue and white, gray, brown and green

CRYSTALS: coral, opal (especially water opal), blue calcite, aquamarine

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): coffee, mint, ocean water, salt, seashells

ZEUS

Zeus is the god of the sky and is considered the ruler, protector, and father of all gods and humans. He is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: eagle, bull

COLORS: white, blue, gold, grey, yellow and black

CRYSTALS: opals are said to have come from Zeus' tears of joy after defeating the Titans, so they are heavily linked to Zeus. diamonds, gold, turquoise, lapis lazuli, celestite, iron/steel, any quartz

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): rain water, oak, olives/olive branches/olive leaves, vervain. images of himself or anything with lightning bolts or shaped like a lighting bolt

That's all for altar connections with Greek Gods! I hope that you found this helpful in your spiritual journey and I hope that you are able to apply this information to your practice.

if you have any questions regarding anything discussed here or anything you feel that I have missed, please send an ask to my ask box! I appreciate all comments and questions!

For more information on my practice, witchcraft, herbalism, spirit work, and divination please check out the guide on my page (linked here)! Everything I have ever posted can be found there!

I wish you all a blessed day filled with peace, endless wealth, and eternal health! Until the next time we meet!

[transmascutena]

Bird Symbolism in Revolutionary Girl Utena

There is quite a large amount of bird and bird-related imagery, symbolism, allegories and metaphors in Revolutionary Girl Utena, and i think all of them are very interesting. Here is a ~2000 word essay about the topic.

The Birdcage Garden: Anthy and Ohtori Academy

This is perhaps the most obvious of the bird symbols in Utena. It is literally Anthy's cage. It is where she, as the Rose Bride, is supposed to spend her time watering the flowers. Touga talks about never letting her out of it once he wins her, and calls her a "lovely little bird." And doesn't that just sum up what so many people's idealized version of her is like? A pretty thing to be admired, only in captivity.

I think the birdcage can also be seen as a sort of microcosm of Ohtori Academy as a whole. Akio does call the school "a garden where people will never become adults," after all, and Anthy is not the only person trapped there, nor is she the only character associated with birds.

According to this analysis, "Ohtori" as a word can mean "big bird" in japanese, and is also a Japanese term for the Fenghuang bird in Chinese mythology, said to be "beautiful, immortal and rules over all birds." Sounds a lot like a certain someone in charge of this place, doesn't it? Which would make every person in Ohtori a bird, symbolically speaking, trapped in the cage that is the academy and ruled by Akio (who, despite being the biggest, and the one with the most control, is also a caged bird.)

Additionally, the statue on the gate to the dueling arena is in the shape of a bird, before it transforms into a rose when opened. I am not sure exactly what this means, but I assume it is in some way symbolic of Akio, Anthy and Ohtori.

The Bird and the Window: Shiori and Juri

The bird that flies into the window during Shiori and Juri's conversation in episode 17 is a Java Sparrow. Despite its name, it is a part of the Estrildid Finch family, but I think the symbolism for sparrows fits the context more, as they can represent love, devotion and compainionship, all of which are very relevant for Juri and Shiori.

The bird is also the symbolic item for Shiori's black rose duel, which means we should associate the bird mainly with her. What, exactly, is the window, then? I think it is symbolic of Shiori's feelings for Juri, Juri's feelings for Shiori, or most likely both. The bird hits the window directly after Juri says "Is that all you have to say to me?" and turns to leave. The bird hits something it could not see in its flight, just as Shiori hits against something that hurts her, even if she doesn't understand it, in her conversation with Juri. The bird is shown to be lying still, presumably dead, after Juri reveals that she was never in love with the boy Shiori "stole" from her.

The bird is shown again after Juri throws her locket in the lake, and before Shiori finds it in her dorm. I've heard it discussed that this implies the bird retrieved the locket (probably through Anthy-as-Mamiya), and if the bird is symbolic of Shiori and the locket is symbolic of Juri's feelings for her, it would mean Shiori is the one to bring them back after Juri tries to rid herself of them. This makes sense.

The Bird Nest: Kozue and Miki

The bird nest that Kozue rescues from the tree that is going to be cut down is symbolic of her and Miki. Or, at least they are symbolic of how Kozue views the two of them. The comparison is pretty straightforward; Kozue projects her and Miki's feelings of abandonment onto these baby chicks, who have been left behind by their parents, just like the two of them were when their parents divorced. I think she projects her protectiveness over her brother moreso than her own feelings about the whole thing, as Kozue likes to think of herself as very independent ("a wild animal") and very unaffected by it all. As seen by her attempt to save the birds in the first place, she is very willing to put herself at risk, and is less concerned with her own feelings/safety.

Now, I don't want to get too much into speculation, but I have to wonder if there was more going on in the Kaoru family than just the divorce and the too-high expectations for the "twin prodigies." Miki's uncharacteristic cynicism in saying "adults who tell you something is for your own good can never be trusted," as well as Kozue's total disregard for authority and her tendency to use her sexuality as a tool both concern me. Although Miki and Kozue's parents are not explicitly shown to be abusive, I do not think it is a stretch to say that there is a possibility that they were. It explains some of Kozue's behaviour in regards to Miki as well. It's not just posesiveness but protectiveness. She has needed to protect him before, and she feels she needs to protect him still (pushing the predatory teacher down the stairs, saving the birds she sees his innocence in.)

Interestingly enough, Anthy interacts with these chicks as well. She advices Miki on how to feed and take care of them. Utena even comments on how unusually straight forward she's being about the whole thing. This might just be another instance of characterizing Anthy as a person who is fond of animals, and that is certainly part of it, but i think there is more to it as well. If these baby birds are symbolic of (Miki and Kozue's, but also a general) feeling of abandonment by parents/adults, as well as their potential abuse, what does that mean for Anthy not only knowing how to take care of them, but being eager to talk about it? Could it perhaps be that she, like Kozue, sees herself in them? Like Kozue, Anthy herself is symbolically a bird, but a caged one in contrast to Kozue's claims of being a wild animal. Could it be that Anthy has had to become an expert in taking care of those (herself) that have been abandoned or failed or abused by the adults in their lives? Rememeber that this is the same episode where she says that Akio is more like a father to her than a brother. A parallel is indirectly being drawn between him and the Kaoru parents.

If Miki and Kozue's parents were abusive, this might be a rare moment of Anthy empathising with other victims, telling them through metaphor how to take care of themselves. Although, it doesn't keep her from continuing to manipulate them, as she goes on to say her line about returning the chicks to their mother, which is what sets Kozue off. Anthy also says that she's never actually raised chicks before. Maybe she's not very good at taking care of them (herself) after all.

There's also what looks like two caged parakeets in Miki's flashback of their childhood. I assume this has similar meaning to Anthy's birdcage, as a feeling of being trapped, in this case by their parents' expectations for them. Kozue used to be a caged bird, but now claims to be a wild one, despite still being inside the birdcage that is Ohtori.

Brood Parasitism: Nanami and Touga (and Utena)

The Kaoru's are not the only sibling pair in Utena to be compared to birds. In Episode 31, Her Tragedy, a pretty unique shadow play is put on in the Chairman's Tower about a cuckoo leaving its egg in another bird's nest, a phenomenon known as brood parasitism. It also references the fairy tale The Ugly Duckling by Hans Christian Andersen. Perhaps the most interesting part of this play is that it's done in the style of the ones in the black rose arc, with C-Ko playing all the roles, the return of the monkey-catching robot, and Utena's fourth-wall breaking commentary at the end. I won't get into what this means, as it doesn't have anything to do with the bird metaphor, but maybe in another post.

This shadow play is about how Nanami and Touga were adopted, and specifically about Nanami's feelings on the matter. Of course adopted children are not parasites, but it makes sense for Nanami to think along those lines, considering her fear of being compared to animals or aliens, and of being ostracized by the society she lives in. Nanami doesn't actually know that she is adopted, only that Touga is, which muddies that interpretation a little. Perhaps it is about Nanami blaming Touga's birth parents for "leaving him in another nest"? Something about her resentment of Touga at this point in time, thinking of him as a parasite in their family? Or simply her fear of what not being his blood-relative means.

I'm more confident about the Ugly Duckling reference, and it being symbolic of Nanami's worry of not fitting in among her peers. Nanami mainly copes with this by thinking that the reason she doesn't fit in, is because she is actually better than everybody else, because she's related to Touga (being a beautiful swan among the common ducks.) The play ends with the cuckoo insisting that it will become a swan one day, when really it can't. It will never be a duck that fits in, either. It will always just be what it is, a parasite (a space-alien. A girl who lays eggs.) This reflects Nanami's despair at the idea that she's "just another fly in the swarm" after her duel in the next episode.

And like all the shadow plays this one can be interpreted as being about Utena as well. She is an orphan who is now being raised in Akio and Anthy's "nest". Although she wasn't placed there by anyone but Akio himself, so it's more about her insecurities about feeling like an outsider in their family. And like the Ugly Duckling/cuckoo, she is also out of place among the rest of the students, and dreams of growing up to be something she can't actually become, in this case a prince. (credits to this analysis on the shadow plays for helping me piece together my thoughts on that. Always cite your sources!)

Cuckoos can also be symbolic of one-sided love, and is the origin of the word cuckoldry. Make of that what you will.

I should mention that Nanami also lays an egg of her own a few episodes prior. ...Or does she?

Her nightmare sequences show her fears of being compared to a chicken, a turtle, a frog, and of course, a space alien, but it is quite obviously a bird egg. And since we are later shown that Anthy has a chicken named Nanami, much like the cow with the same name, it can be assumed that the egg comes from there, and that Anthy brought it to Nanami's bed, perhaps via Chu-Chu. Could this relate to the brood parasitism of the cuckoo in some way? Is this not one bird (Anthy) laying its egg in another bird's (Nanami's) nest (bed) and getting them to raise it? is this what Anthy means when she tells Miki she has never personally raised chicks? Are all of these metaphors connected??? There's also the fan-theory that Nanami's egg hatched a reincarnated Chu-Chu, and in that case would he be the baby cuckoo while Anthy is the mother and Nanami is the duck? I'll be honest I'm not really sure what to make of it at this point. Draw whatever conclusion you want!

Last and probably least interesting is the third of Nanami associated bird imagery: the crow in episode 10. Crows can be symbolic of death, and it feels safe to say that this one is just here to set the mood of the scene, and as visual confirmation that the kitten did indeed die. Not too much to say there.

The Chicken and the Egg: The Student Council

I'd be remiss if i didn't mention the student council's chicken and egg speech in this post as well, even if it has been analyzed to hell and back by hundreds of people before me. It is a reference to Hermann Hesse's book Demian. It is about breaking out of childhood and into adulthood. It is about escaping Ohtori, which is both the egg and the cage (and interestingly enough, during the speech birds can be seen flying by outside the cage of the elevator.) In Nanami's version of the egg speech she mentions "the cage of freedom" and how it cares for the chick. This something that ideally should be true for schools. A place that limits children, but in a way that prepares them for the adult world. Of course, Ohtori as a system has no interest in this, as it is a cage in its most literal sense: a place to keep people trapped. Trapped in their harmful behaviours, in their lack of growth, in their idealized memories of the past, and most of all, in childhood.

And with that, we have come full circle back to Anthy's birdcage as a symbol for all of Ohtori. Thanks for reading :)

[aviradasa]

Welcome to my masterlist

REQUESTS ARE OPEN

{Picture from Pinterest}

Shows:

The umbrella Academy

Supernatural

The walking dead

Miraculous ladybug

How to train your dragon (all spin-off shows)

The dragon Prince mysterys of Aaravos

Movies

Once upon a time

Anime:

Tokyo ghoul

Death note

Van helsing 2004

Hellboy 1 and 2

Labyrinth 1986

The MCU as a whole (Marvel cinematic universe)

Same with the DC universe

Avatar 1 and 2

Pirates of the Caribbean (all movies)

Lord of the rings (lotr)

Games

Sally face

Call of duty

Skyrim

Legend of Zelda breath of the wild/ tears of the kingdom

Assassins creed 2

Stardew valley

Books

Creepypasta

(Work in progress I’m reading a lot more recently so give it time any book suggestions are welcome.I’m a huge fantasy fan!!!)

Bands:

Ghost

David Bowie

Mcr

(I’ll add more here once my will to live dies again.)

Characters I will write for:

The umbrella academy:

Luther

Diego

Allison

Five

Klaus

Ben

Viktor

Lila

Marcus

Fei

Alphonso

Sloane

Jayme

Supernatural:

Sam

Different characters react to you stoned/couch logged

Dean

Different characters react to you stoned/couch logged

Castiel

Different characters react to you stoned/couch logged

Lucifer

Different characters react to you stoned/couch logged

(I'm only on season 5 so if you want more characters let me know and I'll do my best!)

The walking dead:

Rick

Daryl

Different characters react to you stoned/couch logged

Glenn

Maggie

Michonne

Negan

Carl

Rosita

Abraham

Ezekiel

Carol

Miraculous ladybug:

Marinette

Adrian

Luka

Julika

Nino

Alya

Chloé

Kim

Sabrina

Jagged stone

Meeting the kids jagged stone x fem!reader HC

Rose

Nathalie

How to train your dragon:

Hiccup

Astrid

Ruffnut

Tuffnut

Snotlout

Fishlegs

Heather

Eret

Dagur

The dragon Prince, mystery of Aaravos:

Aaravos

Love long lost Aaravos x Fem!reader pt 1

Love long lost Aaravos x Fem!reader pt 2

Love long lost Aaravos x Fem!reader pt3

Love long lost Aaravos x Fem!reader pt4

The sight of two stars Aaravos x Startouched elf! Reader

Aaravos introducing you to his daughter pt 1

Aaravos getting ready to propose to you with the help of leola Pt 2

Teenage!leolas first partner is human! How do you and Aaravos react?

You and Teenage!leola sync up during that time of month. Aaravos is done

Callum

Rayla

Claudia

Viren

Soren

Janai

Nyx

Ibis

Amaya

Corvus

Gren

Terry

Once upon a time:

Mr.Gold ( Rumpelstiltskin )

Captain Killian ‘Hook’ Jones ( Captain hook)

Emma Swan

Regina Mills (the ‘Evil’ queen)

Mary Margaret Blanchard (Snow white)

David Nolan (Prince charming)

(work in progress)

Van Helsing (2004):

Dracula

Aleera

Marishka

Verona

Gabriel Van helsing

Anna valerious

Velkan valerious

Carl

Hellboy 1 and 2 (live action 2004-2008 movies)

Hellboy

Different characters react to you stoned/couch logged

Abe

Liz

John

Prince Nuada

Different characters react to you stoned/couch logged

Princess nuala

Labrynth 1986

Jareth the goblin king

Marvel:

Peter Parker

Thor

Loki

Tony Stark

Dr, Stephan strange

Wanda

Bucky

Natasha

Nick Fury

Bruce banner

Steven Rodger

DC:

Bruce Wayne

Barry allen

Oliver Queen

Clark kent

Robin

Starfire

Raven

Cyborg

Beastboy

Joker

Harley

Poison Ivy

Catwoman

Avatar 1 and 2

Jake sulley

Naytiri

Neteyam

Lo’ak

Kiri

Miles Quaritch

Javier “spider”

Aonung

Grace

Pirates of the Caribbean:

Captain jack sparrow

Captain Hector Barbossa

Will Turner

Elizabeth Swan

James Norrington

Bootstrap bill turner

Davey jones

Lord Cutler Beckett

Calypso ( Tia Dalma)

Lord of the rings/the hobbit (lotr)

Legolas

Aragorn

Sam

Frodo

Pippin

Merry

Boromir

Faramir

Arwen

Gimli

Éowyn

Elrond

Sally face:

sal fisher

Sal,Larry,ash (separately) x reader Makeout hc

Larry and sal (separately) x Chubby!fem!Reader Hcs

Larry johnson

Sal,Larry,ash (separately) x reader Makeout hc

Larry Johnson general hcs

Larry and sal (separately) x Chubby!fem!reader hcs

Ash

Sal,Larry,ash (separately) x reader Makeout hc

Call of duty:

Ghost Mw2 and 2009

König

Soap

Price

Graves

Skyrim:

Cicero

Astrid

Arnbjorn

Farkus

Vilkas

Aela

Balgruuf the greater

Legend of Zelda Botw/totk:

Link

Zelda

Mipha

Daruk

Revali

Sidon

Urbosa

Kass

ganon

Assassins creed 2:

Ezio

Stardew valley (Sdv):

Alex

Elliot

Harvey

Sam

Sebastian

Shane

Abigail

Emily

Haley

Leah

Maru

Penny

The wizard

Caroline

Dwarf

Jodi

Kent

Krobus

Robin

Pierre

Sandy

Ghost:

Papa Emeritus 1 (primo)

Papa Emeritus 2 (secondo

Papa emeritus 3 (terzo)

Papa emeritus 4/cardinal copia

Swiss

Aether

Mountin

Phantom

Aurora (we have the same name irl lol)

Rain

Cirrus

Sunshine

Cumulus

Sodo

Dewdrop

David bowie(going by era current stage persona):

Ziggy stardust

Aladdin sane

The thin white duke

Major tom

David bowie

My chemical romance

Gerard way

Party poison

Mikey way

Kobra kid

Frank iero

Fun ghoul

Ray toro

Jet star

I will add Other characters to any of these lists if you would like to request a character go on ahead!

What I will write/Rules:

Rules:

No bullying or harrassment to anyone or groups of people in the comments. BE NICE TO OTHERS

No homophobia

No racism

No hatred

What I will write:

Fluff

Angst

No self harm. I've struggled with it in the past and still sometimes do so I won't write for it

Smut

(FOR SMUT I WILL NEVER EVER ERITE ANYTHING LISTED BELOW)

No Pe*o*hili* (this includes age play)

No R@pe

No Necro

No poop or pee shit

If there is anything else I find out exists that I don't like I will add to this list.

IF YOU REQUEST THESE THINGS YOU WILL BE BLOCKED AND REPORTED.

Lemon

Anything you want I will add

I don't write for Male readers anymore. Due to some uncomfortable and unnessasary comments and requests. I apologize for this. I will write for trans folks though

PS. When requesting please be specific to what fandom/character you want(I will do crossovers.) just so I can make sure to get everything right for ya!

[mousetoe-wc]

I Got bored one time awhile ago and made a list of every prefix plus some into organised sections so I thought I might as well share.

All the ones that aren’t cannon to warriors, yet at lest are bold

Describing names

Colours: red, russet, copper, golden, amber, yellow, green, blue, violet, pink, white, gray, black, ebony, dark, pale, silver, brown, tawny, fallow

Pattern, Texture + Size: spot/ted, dapple, speckle, freckle, brindle, patch, mottle, ragged, tangle, kink, bristle, fuzzy, curl/y, wooly, soft, sleek, little, tiny, small, slight, short, tall, long, big, heavy, crooked, broken, half, stumpy, shred, torn, jagged

Actions + Character: flip, pounce, bounce, jump, hop, crouch, down, low, drift, flail, strike, running, fidget, mumble, whistle, snap, sneeze, shiver/ing, shining, flutter, fallen, lost, rush, fleet, quick, shy, sweet, brave, loud, quiet, wild, hope, wish,

Other: claw, whisker, dead, odd, one, spike, fringe, echo, song, hallow, haven

Elements

Time + Weather: day, night, dusk, dawn, morning, sky, sun/ny, moon, storm, lightning, thunder, cloud/y, mist/y, fog, snow, blizzard, ice, frost, dew, drizzle, rain, clear, wind, breeze, gale, shadow, shade, bright, light,

Earth/Water/Fire names: stone, rock, boulder, slate, flint, pebble, gravel, sand/y, dust, mud/dy, meadow, hill, rubble, river, ripple, whorl, float, rapid, shimmer, lake, swamp, marsh, wave, wet, bubbling, splash, puddle, pool, creek, fire, flame, flicker, flash, blaze, scorch, ember, spark, ash, soot, cinder, smoke

Plants

Trees: alder, aspen, birch, beech, cedar, cypress, pine, elm, willow, oak, larch, maple, bay, rowan, timber, bark, log, wood, twig, acorn, cone, seed, spire

Berry/Nut/Fruit/Herb: juniper, elder, sloe, holly, yew, mistle, bramble, hickory, hazel, chestnut, nut, apple, cherry, cranberry, olive, pear, plum, peach, chive, mint, fennel, sage, basil, mallow, parsley

Flowers: aster, poppy, primrose, rose, bluebell, marigold, tansy, pansy, briar, cherry, daisy, dandelion, daffodil, tulip, violet, lily, myrtle, thrift, yarrow, heather, lavender, blossom, bloom, flower, petal

Other: leaf, frond, fern, bracken, sorrel, hay, rye, oat, wheat, cotton, reed, pod, cinnamon, milkweed, grass, clover, weed, stem, sedge, gorse, furze, flax, nettle, thistle, ivy, moss, lichen, bush, vine, root, thorn, prickle, nectar

Animals

Mammals: mouse, rat, mole, vole, shrew, squirrel, hedgehog, bat, rabbit, hare, ferret, weasel, stoat, mink, marten, otter, hog, wolf, hound, fox, vixen, badger, deer, doe, stag, fawn, sheep, cow, pig, lion, tiger, leopard, lynx, milk

Birds: robin, jay, cardinal, thrush, sparrow, swallow, shrike, starling, rook, swift, dove, pigeon, crow, raven, duck, goose, heron, wren, finch, swan, stork, quail, gull, lark, owl, eagle, hawk, kestrel, buzzard, kite, hoot, feather, bird, egg, talon

Fish, Reptiles + Amphibians: pike, perch, pollack, trout, tench, cod, carp, bass, bream, eel, minnow, fin, snake, adder, lizard, turtle, frog, toad, newt

Bug type Names: bug, lady or ladybug, moth, spider, ant, snail, slug, beetle, bee, wasp, dragon or dragonfly, bumble, worm, maggot, cricket, fly, midge, web, honey

Skyclan + Warriorclan: Bella, Billy, Big, Harry, Harvey, Snook, Ebony, Monkey

[loneberry]

notes from my sickbed

(From The Color of Pomegranates by Sergei Parajanov)

*

Books I’ve finished reading during my COVID convalescence. I read Shatz’s Fanon biography, The Rebel’s Clinic, with a race + psychoanalysis reading group I’ve been hosting for a few years now. I have mixed feelings about the book, but that topic is for another day.

Re: Minor Detail—listen to this wide-ranging interview with Palestinian novelist Adania Shibli. Toward the end there is a thought-provoking conversation about the question of the state. Loved the discussion of the hospitality of language. The bells tolling in the background. The agency of words, the being of silence. 

*

The only thing I like more than reading in bed is reading outside. I’ve just been sitting on my back porch from around 7:30am until an hour before sunset, reading and writing notes, pausing whenever there is a soft breeze to look at the quivering leaves of the maple, or to observe the adorable sparrows that have built a nest in the roof of my porch. (They fly off toward the tree when they sense I am looking at them.) I’ve been feeling quite weak, but I force myself to walk a little around sunset despite the shortness of breath. In the evening I watch films and fall asleep listening to podcasts. 

A couple days ago I walked past the old apartment I used to live in during the pandemic. Is it wrong to say—I felt a kind of relief when everything shut down, that my frenetic schedule of events + travel was instantly erased. I quite enjoy spending time alone, marinating in my thoughts, reading and writing all day, living in a semi-hallucinatory state induced by how intensely I live in these parallel worlds made up of words. (So some part of me finds pleasure in convalescing too.)

On Hancock Street, the bursting rose bushes have been uprooted to make room for the sleek new (hideous) house on the corner. The Mountain laurel and wild roses were blooming at the apartment I lived in during the pandemic. I thought about how well I got to know the tiny radius around that apartment, the almost-religious attention I paid to every inch of new plant growth, how I mapped my emotional state onto whatever was blooming in that moment—forsythia during the initial lockdown, the scent of lilac wafting in through the window as I completed my last weeks of grad school, the roses and mountain laurel blooms during the news of M’s suicide.

I walked on the trail I walked on during the pandemic, by the grape vines covering the fence of the community gardens, the same vines I observed four years ago while talking to M’s publisher on the phone, listening to his voice crack with emotion as he spoke about wishing there was something he could have done, while another part of my brain recoiled at the sight of the pockmarked leaves—a disease was spreading across the vines, possibly triggering my (moderate) trypophobia. He was saying something about a camera he had given her... 

I remember looking at the last orange light catching the tops of the maple trees and thinking, “You’ll never see that light.”

My oura ring metrics are still in the dumps (it’s funny this little smart ring knew I was sick before I did) but I think I am slowly getting over this bout of COVID. The fatigue and brain fog is crushing, but at least I can still smell the irises. 

[designs-by-sloan]

"So many years have passed The dew is still on the roses I left my childhood In a garden green" -cecile corbel

Tranquility of the garden {2023 version} Click read more for my thoughts, detail shots and the 2013 version of this artwork <3

Artwork © 2023 Sloan || Do not use without permission, no A/I or N/FTs allowed. Check my carrd for my social media / and commission info! Also available as merch on my redbubble shop.  

2023 was incredibly tumultuous for me, which led me to feeling like I was missing my spark as an artist. This redraw was my attempt to find some solace in creativity and reconnect with myself from back in 2013. It was already a personal piece inspired by the nature I grew up with, yet I didn't feel satisfied with the result back then despite all the time I put into it. All I had wanted was to move on to the next piece. Now I can say this is the artwork I'm most proud of, and I'm quite emotional about it 🌸🌿

{I can barely believe this artwork is already 10 years old.}

This redraw took 34+ hours over the course of a couple months to complete <3 Included nature is wild roses, swallowtail butterflies, clovers, yellow lady slipper orchids, prairie hare, and house sparrows - all found wild on the Manitoba prairies 🦋

I'll be uploading a short timelapse as a reel on instagram, but I'm also thinking of doing a more in-depth youtube video. Let me know if you'd like to see that!!

Thanks for reading! Hope everyone has a great week~

[kipsels]

Purr

Stelle x Jing Yuan

ft. lion hybrid Jing Yuan

-

When they had first arrived on the Xianzhou Luofu, Stelle had been taken aback by how… colourful the people were. From ears and tails to claws and scales, the inhabitants of The Luofu all sported a myriad of different features.

Not even Mr Yang’s deep dive into the cultural differences of the Xianzhou and their fraught history with the Aeon of Abundance would have prepared Stelle for the reality of what it all meant.

And okay, maybe if she’d listened a little harder to Mr Yang she might been able to avoid mixing up her Foxians from her Xianzhou Natives, but with that many fluffy tails to keep track of it was pretty hard not to get things mixed up sometimes!

But her initial fascination had been quickly buried once they’d found themselves knee deep in all the turmoil aboard the ship, especially when Dan Heng showed off his own set of scales to boot.

Now that things had settled, Stelle couldn’t help but stare.

At everyone.

“Do you think Fu Xuan is embarrassed by her cute, floppy bunny ears?”

Jing Yuan’s eyebrows rose high on his forehead, a shock of laughter escaping past his lips. He stared up at her, eyes bright with mirth. “What makes you ask that?”

“They just look so soft and cuddly and pink. It’d be hard to command anyone’s attention if people just want to pat your head all the time.” Stelle shrugged.

“Lady Fu would take the hand of anyone foolish enough to attempt such an act,” He chuckled. “Only the ignorant or stupid would think her ears were a sign that she is meek in nature.”

“But–”

“My dear, I’m sure you’d prefer to keep your hands attached to your body.”

“I guess…”

Feeling dejected, Stelle turned her attention to the pair of ears that belonged to the man whose head was currently occupying her lap.

They weren't cute little bunny ears, but...

At first, Stelle hadn’t even noticed the rounded, fluffy ears on the top of Jing Yuan’s head.

Even now, they were well hidden within his veritable mane of white hair, but the fuzzy cast of the hologram projection had camouflaged them completely during their first few encounters.

But when they’d met, really met, Stelle had been caught off guard by the long tail that lazily swished through the air behind him, and the ears that swivelled and flicked as he listened to every little sound around him.

It was a shame that the curse of immortality had to be so… cute.

As if reading her very thoughts, those sly gold eyes of his stared up at her, silently egging her on. Daring her to reach out.

Well, no one ever said that Stelle was one to back down from a challenge.

Her hand combed through his wild mane, fingers fighting through the tangles of his silken hair to find the base of his right ear. She smiled when she felt fur against her fingertips, and the shell of his ear turned as if to tease her into action.

Needing no further prompting, her thumb and forefinger began to knead at the base of his ear, enjoying the sensation just as much as he was, if the way he leaned into her palm was any indication.

Or the way he quite literally began to purr in her lap.

The sound came from somewhere deep within his chest, a steady rumble that only grew in volume the longer she massaged the shell of his ear. It peaked when she swapped to the other side, his purring so loud that she was certain any of his attendants walking past would surely hear.

“Mm, right there,” He chuffed, a pleasant shiver passing through his whole body.

“You couldn't scratch this itch by yourself?”

“And deprive you of the pleasure? Surely not.”

Stelle rolled her eyes, trying to fight the blush threatening to spread across her cheeks as he turned his face to nuzzle into her belly. Jing Yuan curled his massive body to fit on the bench, his long white tail resting over the top of his thigh.

“You’re just a big old cat.”

“If I am a big, old, cat… Then you are the little sparrow that I have caught between my paws.” His eye cracked open to capture her attention once more.

“A pretty little sparrow that sings so sweetly for me at night, when we are alone in my b-”

“Jing Yuan!”

He chuckled, and Stelle caught a glimpse of the feline fangs hiding behind his lips.

“Keep scratching, love, and I might reward your good deeds with a kiss.”

- Fin -

[secret-smut-sideblog]

The Sparrow

Lavellan x Blackwall

PG-13 - implied death, loss, intense grief, implied limb loss, distrust, longing, tenderness, love confession (sort of), cultural displacement

In her purgatory of snow, Vella tries to reach somewhere shaped like home. Her love and her cause lost to her, a voice guides her forward...

Masterlist, Prev Chapter

-

Please, keep talking. I don't know how much farther I can go.

Her feet were so heavy. Head bowed to brace against the cold.

I'm sorry, I have not abandoned you. I must focus to stay here.

She nodded in a tremble. Holding tightly along her chest with stiff fingers.

Your father was right. If that brings you any solace. I couldn't find your mind again until you slept deep. Your god struggles to pull your thread.

She smiled, despite everything. Her eyelashes heavy with ice.

I thought you might not be him.

I am not.

My legs are numb.

I know. Keep going.

She wanted to cry, but all of her was put in forcing her legs forward.

You are very hard to find. Your name has been only a whisper caught on wind.

She stopped, staring out at the white punishment circling her. Biting with razor teeth.

You must not stop. You will fall.

Her feet pushed again through snow. Whimpering for mercy that this eternal winter could not hear.

Good. You're doing so well.

"Please. My name." She cried.

Don't speak. Your mouth will freeze.

Please.

The voice paused. Then spoke in a soft murmur that she instinctually leaned her head to hear.

When you came to be, your mother held you tight to her breast. She had lost much blood, but she traced her finger along your cheek. When your father ran to get a healer, she whispered it into the crown of your head. Three times, she spoke you into the world.

Vella clenched her eyes tightly, silver leaking in bubbles along her ice taught cheeks.

When he saw your eyes, he made her swear to leave you nameless.

The voice laughed.

She was very convincing.

A hiccuping laugh left her.

Please, tell me about her.

So the kind voice spoke. About her guile and charm. About the way she would laugh with her whole belly, often falling into her side. About her solemn adoration, the fierce messy love she poured. All the pieces she hoped would live inside her child.

She ran like a fawn and killed with her teeth. A woman rare amongst all. Soft and wild. She was so glad to meet you.

The dark was encroaching. Her eyes slipped up into sockets. Legs lifting in shudders, muscles screaming.

You're so close. I promise. Just ahead.

Then I can rest?

Then you will rest.

She cried out into her throat. Pushing with her body shrieking along with her. Well past delirium, her mind fighting to go blank.

No. Stay here.

I can't...

You can. You will.

Please, I want to go home.

The voice came down to her ear. She swore she could feel warm breath fanning.

You are your mother's daughter. You have all you need. Listen. It's there, you're almost home.

She focused, but her ears only rang with struggling blood. Each step a boulder pushed uphill.

I didn't know dying would hurt this much. Why does it hurt so much?

Focus. Just a few more steps.

Please, was I good? I wanted to be good. I tried...

The voice took a shaky breath.

My name...

Her body started to seize, legs locking her out. She forced them. Just a little further.

Yes. Just a little further.

My name...

The voice got heavy again. Sorrow deep in its throat.

I will tell you. I promise. Just keep moving.

-

Blackwall sat at the edge of the bonfire, staring at his hands limp on his lap. His palms empty.

He carried countless shards of grief everywhere, they cut into him with every breath. But this grief burned. It boiled behind his heart, in the clench of his teeth.

He didn't know how to mourn with a grief this angry. How to take it out far enough to stare at it. It filled his lungs. It screamed and screamed and screamed.

She was dead.

He rose to feet and thrashed the chair from under him. Smashing it again and again into the tight packed snow. Screams lost inside his collapsed throat.

Cassandra stood, but Cullen held her shoulder. His eyes heavy with empathy.

Blackwall's eyes rounded on Solas. Seeing through red.

The elf had been so serene all night. Sitting with hands rested gently on knees. Eyes roving slow under lids. Silently muttering his prayers.

Blackwall rose, hunched with the rage of a beast. Breathing through spittle that huffed through his lips.

"What do your gods say then, elf?" He stalked forward. Sharpening his grief into a spear. "Was it worth it? Did taking her fill them?"

Solas only tightened his eyes against the intrusion.

"I know you heard me, you bastard."

A handful of his tunic lifted the pious man to his eyes.

"Blackwall, enough." Cullen pulled on his bicep.

"What do you see?" He hissed, eyes tight with hate. Tears slipping cold.

Solas smiled, finally opening his eyes. Gripping Blackwall's wrist.

"By Andraste..." Mother Giselle breathed. Rising to feet, her eyes on the ridgeline. Solas' eyes followed, a strange triumph in their leading.

Cullen rushed forward past Blackwall's hunched shoulder, and Solas wriggled out of his grip. Running ahead of him in swift gallops through snow.

His eyes finally lifted.

A golden head was shining in the hell of winter.

"No..." He breathed.

He could see nothing but her as he ran.

Solas caught her just as she fell to knees. Her arms seized straight against her chest, eyes hazy and rolled into her skull. Her deathly pale face went slack into a serene smile. Lips tearing, a rivulet of blood trickled down her chin. She laughed like someone had told the funniest joke.

Blackwall charged past Solas, and he let him. Releasing her in a soft touch.

He gathered under her thighs and hoisted her onto his chest. So tightly clenching her frozen body to him. Spinning down the hill to run her to the bonfire.

She laughed weakly again, her head falling slack into his shoulder.

He couldn't speak, gasping unformed words into her ear. Nearly losing his footing in the downwards slide of snow. Sprinting with all of his will.

He fell to a kneel at the flame. Rocking her back and forth, cupping her head to his chest.

"Please, please..." He begged to someone, anyone.

She said something in his ear in Elvish in a shivered voice. He pulled her back, searching her with wild eyes. She tilted her head at him, her terribly cold hand trying to cup his face.

She repeated herself, searching his eyes for something he was desperately sick to answer. Then smiled again.

She spoke one more phrase in Elvish, then looked up at the night sky. Her body going fully slack.

"No..." He moaned, gently shaking her. "No, no, no... Maker, please..."

Dorian fell to knees next to him. Pressing her chest with burning palms.

"I will never forgive you if you leave me with these brutes!" He hissed through teeth.

"Here, the last of our potions!" Cullen dropped them in the snow, kneeling at her other side.

Tears clouded his eyes, taking a potion and ripping the cork with his teeth. Filling his mouth with life and coaxing her locked jaw open. Pouring from him to her in the seal of their mouths. Rubbing her throat in a shaken encourage to swallow.

"Come on. Come on, darling." He gasped. "You can do it."

Her eyes struggled to focus, rolling loose. Slowly swallowing in strained gulps.

"There you go. You're doing so good. You're so good." He urged, leaning down into her again. Tightly closing his eyes to hear the holy sound of her breathing.

"Makers breath!" Cullen gasped, rising back in shock.

Dorian gripped Blackwall's forearm.

"Her eyes..."

He pulled back to scan her with urgent glances.

He breathed slowly, shock unfurling in his chest. Reaching forward to brush her cheek. Leaving a streak of slick metal on his thumb. He stared down at her in awe. Her eyes gently closed. Silver tears running down her face.

"Get her inside. Hurry." Solas' voice low in his ear. The elf's hand tight on his shoulder. Suddenly aware of his presence kneeled near.

He huffed breath and lifted her to his chest. The small crowd risen from sleep starting to close. Voices questioning in alarm.

"Move!" He barked, tucking her head into his shoulder. "Get back!"

"Is that the..."

"I said move!" He growled. The sea parted for him.

Solas led toward his tent.

"No. Mine."

Solas sighed, seeing the fire in his eyes.

"As you wish. I'll bring supplies then."

He entered his tent with a shove on the canvas. Gently laying her back on the thick pelt that was his bed. Wiping her silver as gently as his tremoring fingers would allow.

What has she been carrying?

He wrapped her in all the blankets he had.

What has been inside her?

Solas entered again, setting several blankets, a bowl, bundles of elfroot, and a damp rag at her side. Lighting the elfroot in cupped hands, blowing gently on the embers. The air laced with sweet haze.

"What do you know?" Blackwall hissed, narrowing his eyes. Tightly packing the blankets around her.

"Enough. Do you want her to recover or not?"

He tightened the clench of his teeth. Taking the damp rag and gently started to clean her face. Catching the tears dripped down into her temples.

"Good." He nodded, setting a small burning bundle into the bowl, then paused. Leaning down to her. Cupping her cheek and whispering something in her ear.

Her eyes darted under lids, but didn't open.

"What was that? What did you do?" He pulled him back by the scruff of his collar. Burning a promise of violence in his gaze. "I swear I will kill you with a smile on my face."

"Just something shared between elves."

A realization hit him.

"What did she say? What did she say to me?"

"Dalish dialect is not universal."

"Solas!"

He sighed, giving him a put upon look.

"Hello, my bear. Hello, my bear?... Oh, I live then. You would understand me in death."

Thom crumpled into himself, hot tears finally spilling out. Releasing the terrible ache in heaving sobs.

-

The world was so warm. A smell of fur, wood shaving, and musk. She turned to bury her face into it. The unmistakable smell of a well-worn man savored in her breath.

As she blinked her eyes open, the world filled again. The endless wandering dark replaced with a soft lit tent.

She leaned up on elbows, the haze of deep sleep still pulling at her limbs. Feeling a spike of panic when the realization hit. Then softened when she saw a bowl of elfroot at her side. Brow furrowed in curiosity.

She spied the slumped figure of Blackwall in the corner of the tent, head fallen forward. Seeming to have just succumbed to sleep, back braced along the tent pole. Eyes lined with exhaustion.

"Oh..." She breathed. Vague memory coming back to her. The battle. Snow? There was someone with her... wasn't there?

"We need to talk." Cassandra pushed inside the tent. The rest of her council followed in her wake.

"She just woke up. Can this not wait?" Cullen urged. His eyes fallen on her in apology.

"It cannot." Cassandra stated, turning to level a cold stare down at her.

"What are you?"

Vella rose to lean on her thighs. So they knew.

"Gods touched." She sighed.

"How long?"

"Since birth."

"Can you control it?"

"I can stifle it."

"Right. I want her out."

Cullen leveled his shock at her.

"You can't be serious."

"How?" Leilana agreed. Gesturing at Vella's marked hand.

"I don't know yet. But you know just as well as I do the danger magic like this holds." Cassandra crossed her arms at Cullen. "She's some Elven gods plaything. We can figure it out."

"Let's be reasonable." Josephine soothed, stepping forward.

"You can take the hand." Vella offered.

"Or not..." Josephine sighed.

Cassandra nodded, drawing her sword.

"Leilana, give me your belt."

Vella laid her forearm on a chest, and Cassandra held out her hand expectantly. Holding her elbow down with a boot.

Blackwall stood between them.

"Try it, and you lose more than a hand." He promised in a deadly growl.

"Okay." Cullen commanded. "Everyone take a breath. We're not severing limbs and we are not exiling our friend based on flashpoint fear."

Cassandra grit her jaw but relented. Seating her sword back with a click and stepping back with coiled energy. Vella retreated her arm, Blackwall giving her a tired stare of affectionate reproach. Coming to sit beside her. Rubbing her back in warm circles.

"How do you expect me to trust her? How do we know when it's her speaking and not some hand puppeteering behind her eyes?" Her arms folded again.

"They'll turn silver." Vella offered again. But the question struck her too late as rhetorical.

"Not. Reassuring." Cassandra hissed at her. Not bothering to turn.

"She's trying to help." Josephine pointed out.

"She is..." Leilana led, leaning down to kneel across from her. "Did it... at the battle at Haven...?"

Vella nodded.

"So all of that was...? Great." Cassandra huffed, ducking out of the tent with bristled back. "I want her watched. Cullen, stay with her."

Leilana held her gaze.

"This could help us, what you see. Tell me."

"It..." Vella sighed, rubbing her hand into her brow. This is what she was afraid of. "It doesn't work like that. Have you ever had... ah, I don't know the word for it in Common... a false memory? Like you've lived something before?"

"Deja vu?" Josephine offered, her eyes also filled with curiosity.

"Yes, it comes on in the moment. It's like that. I don't control when it happens."

"But, it still happens?"

"I try to keep it to a minimum. Sleep deprivation is the best way to stifle it."

"But... why stifle it at all? Surely you see the advantage this brings us?"

Vella furrowed her brow in sorrow. The hunger in Leilana's gaze apparent. Her power always overrode her personhood in their eyes eventually.

The rumble of Blackwall's voice picked up next to her.

"Did you see her? In the chantry before..." He shuddered. "Before it fell."

Leilana shook her head, seeming to see him again.

"I did." Josephine spoke softly. "She was... it was awful."

"Is that what it does to you?" She hushed, folding gently onto knees at her side. Taking her hand into hers.

Vella's chest ached.

"My father had the same condition. He thought he was helping the clan, and he was. He went mad. I can... I fight it in a way he couldn't. But it's too much. It makes my brain burn."

"I knew a boy with a seizing sickness. He moved just like you did that day." Josephine rubbed her knuckles with her thumb. "I'm so sorry."

"Thank you." She breathed. Silver tears bubbled along her eyes. One spilled and slowly fell down her cheek.

"Oh..." Josephine gasped gently.

"Cullen said..." Leilana breathed, her eyes filled with awe.

Vella sniffled, wiping with the back of her hand.

"Eyes of my father. Cassandra was right to be afraid of me. If I dont fight it, if I let it take full heed... he got violent in the end. It gets worse with time."

Leilana's lips pressed into a thin line.

"We won't push you." Josephine promised.

"No, we won't." Leilana sighed. "Just... if something slips through, and I'm nearby..."

"I'll lean in your ear." Vella assured.

Leilana nodded, rising to feet.

"Your power... it's something I've wished for. But nothing comes free, does it?"

"No." Vella laughed coldly.

"I'm sorry. Get some rest." Leilana ducked out of the tent.

Josephine patted her hand, cupping it between hers. Rising to feet as well.

"If you need anything, I'm nearby."

"Thank you. Truly."

Cullen regarded her sadly. Sympathy heavy in his eyes.

"Cassandra will expect me here."

"It's fine, I don't mind. You can take me out if I get too unruly."

"Not funny." Blackwall huffed.

"A little funny." Vella countered, smiling gently at him.

She gathered more elfroot into the bowl, blowing gently on an ember.

"I didn't know you could burn elfroot like that." Cullen settled into a corner, eyeing her with appreciative curiosity.

"Spooky elf secrets." She winked. "If I must sleep it helps keep my mind... relaxed. A little hazy around the edges."

"Oh... oh!"

"Sorry, does it bother you?" She wafted the small trail of smoke away from him.

"No... it shouldn't. I have a... history. But it should be fine. Maybe it'll even help me relax too."

"Corrupting the men. My strong suit." She teased. Giving Blackwall a mischievous tick of her eyebrows.

"Go back to sleep. Give the men a rest."

"So stoic." She grumbled in an impression of his voice.

"Shush, woman." The edge of a laugh on his words. Encouraging her to lean back with a gentle pull on her bicep.

She settled into the pelt again with a soft sigh, body deep in exhaustion still. Curling on her side.

Blackwall gently ran his fingers along her back, scratching in slow arcs. She nearly whimpered, bending into his touch. Falling deeper and deeper. Then she was swept away.

He stared down at her, a love soft in his heart. Adoring the small pout of her lips and the pleasured furrow in her brow at his touch. Breathing soft and sweet.

Cullen regarded them with gentle appreciation.

"You love her." He stated softly.

Blackwall sighed. His hand left her back to rub a thumb over her cheek.

"I can't afford to."

"But you do."

"Yes." He admitted, heart so terribly heavy.

"Run to that. Don't let it slip away."

"You're too young to be giving me advice, soldier."

"Perhaps. But I'm not a fool. I see how she looks at you."

"Why?" He asked her sleeping form. So beautiful it ached through him, a thrum of need he couldn't control in his heart. Brushing gold strands from her temple.

"Women are strange and wonderful. Who knows, maybe she sees some worth in you." He teased.

He clenched his jaw. Guilt eating a hole in his stomach.

"Get some rest, old dog. I'll take up my arbitrary watch." Cullen pulled a small book from a pocket on his belt.

Blackwall settled down next to her. Laying on his side, facing her for a moment. Her beauty a soft joy and a terrible spell. He turned over.

Her arm wound around his ribs, sliding up into the curve of his body. He clenched his eyes.

So warm.

Everything he needed.

Not strong enough to pull away.

Falling asleep with her cradling his back.

-

Vella rose from her ill-fated rest near the fire, her eyes just nearly closed. Her council squabbling in hushed voices under a tarp.

"Herald, how are you faring?" Mother Giselle's kind voice next to her.

She tightened at the title.

"You know, I never have called you by your name." Her voice soft in apology, seeing her discomfort.

Her name...

Something pulled at the back of her mind, but was too vague around the edges.

"Vella is fine."

"Short for lavellan?"

"Yeah, Blackwall coined me that. I've grown fond of it."

"Pretty name. It suits you."

"I should stop them. We can't afford to be afraid in the open. People will get scared, too." She sighed, sitting up.

Giselle settled her hand on her forearm, pausing her.

"While I was..."

Dead.

"-missing, did we find if Corypheus had followed?"

"We've seen no sign of him. But we've also seen no sign of anything else either. We're not sure where we are, and that may have saved us."

Vella's eyes clenched shut.

She knew where they were.

Giselle stared at her.

"Why do you fight it, child?"

Not quick enough.

She cupped her hands over her face, resting elbows on knees.

Giselle waited.

"What's worse, your god who is, at best absent. At worst..."

"Never there in the first place?" Giselle offered softly.

Vella nodded.

"Or my gods? The pantheon of meddling children. Terribly present and with no qualms about puppeteering our lives..."

"I understand our chantry hasn't been kind to you."

Vella nearly laughed. That was a deep understatement.

"I don't hold that against you personally." She assured. "Pain has poisoned my heart to your cause. But you've been kind to me. I appreciate that."

"Is that why you can't see yourself as our H-... our guide?"

"It's more than that, but yes."

She sighed, looking out over the lost and the wounded.

"I'm Dalish, I'm never going to be a full part of your world. I can play this role if people need me, but I will always be an outsider."

"I can't know that feeling fully, not without living it, but I disagree."

Vella turned her gaze. Giselle's warm eyes appraised her.

"These people admire you. They're dedicated to this cause because of you. Perhaps you can't see your strength, your cunning, but they can. And that is more powerful because you are different from them."

"I'm not a saint." She hissed.

"No, nor a martyr. You may even be a fraud."

Vella laughed, a lump in her throat.

"But I doubt it." Giselle smiled.

Vella stood, heading to convene with her council, but they had already disbanded. Angry and cold in their separate tents. Shoulders rounded and eyes weary on maps and texts.

Vella paused, a deep pit of exhaustion and displacement in her belly. She could soothe their worries, push out every wrinkle with care. Gods, she could pull the heavens down with her hand. But it wouldn't make her any less of a stranger.

She clenched her hands at her sides. Staring down at the packed snow.

When all of this was over, she would be a wandering girl in the forest again. Trying desperately to return to a home that had died in her arms.

Mother Giselle's voice picked up behind her, a soft psalm she knew the shape of. Stepping out to beckon it to her weary people. They rose, calling it back in soft hope.

Vella fell away into shadow. The psalm too heavy on her. Tears spilling down her cheeks. Watching their communion in the snow.

Blackwall's hand settled silently on her back. Watching with her from the outside. Hand a balm on the scars hidden there.

~

Next Chapter

[starscatteredsky]

inbox check? ^^

sure!

Finished, queued, and ready to post (in order of when they will be posted)!

Tips for a golden retriever

Tip and home decor kit for aussie shepard

Neos for a cat/wolf/ colin the computer

Tips for a banshee

Tips for a wolf to clean their room

Names for an angel

Tips for colin the computer

Tips for a eurasian lynx

Tips for a creeper

Tips for a fox

Names for a gargoyle

Tips for a timber wolf

Tips for a bearded vulture

Tips for a black house spider

Tips for a guinea pig

Tips for ghostbur

Tips for the Cashier (GASA4)

Tips for knight armour

Norwegian forest cat

Fashion for a clydesdale

Tips for kasia from hilda

Fashion for dragons

Tips and genders for a german shepard

In progress/drafts (in no particular order):

Tips and fashion kit for maned wolf

Tips and fashion for a robotic wolf

Tips for a ninetails

Tips for a ferret

Tips and playlist for a warden

Tips for bill cypher

Tips and fashion for rose quartz

Tips and fashion for a great horned owl

Fashion for a weather angel

Fashion for an african wild dog

Fashion for an orange persian cat

Denboard and fashionboard for a vancouver island coastal wolf

Neos, xenos, and a fashionkit for N (murder drones)

Black cat and shark tips

Tips for a minecraft phantom

Tips for eevee

Tips for draculara

Punk fashion kit and tips for a pine marten

Tips for dwebble and crustle

Tips for bowerbirds

Inbox/not yet started (in no particular order!)

Fashion and home decor for the old web

Fashionboard for an angel

Sweater fashion kit

Tips and fashion for lilac (Orin Ayo)

70s/80s fashion for an incubus

Tips for pickles the drummer (metalocalypse)

Tips for paldean whoopers

Tips for lilac (orin ayo)

Tips for an eldritch horror

Tips for issac from binding of issac

Tips for zekrom

Home inspo for yeerks

Dysphoria relieving tips for a general nonhuman

Tips and fashion for fern the human (adventuretime)

Tips for a space-man (KISS)

Tips for crows and cockatoos

Fashion for black backed jackal

Tips for an albino american cockroach

Tips for mark heathcliff (mandela catalouge)

Tips for connecting to mermaid kintype away from the sea

Tips for space divines

Tips for a black cat

Tips for scarlet (pearlecentmoon) and nihachu (genloss)

Tips for aven (worldless)

Tips for flippy (htf)

Tips for persecutor unicorns

Tips for micheal afton

Tips for C1tubbo

Tips for tusnami (wof)

Tips for dib membrane (invader zim)

Tips for a tiger with connection to space

Tips for c!tubbo without explosions

Tips for ball jointed dolls

Tips fpr a nextbot

Tips and neos for quetzalcoatlus

Moodboard and tips for shadow demon

Tips for a centipede

Fashion for snow leopards

Tips for a dog/fae and mimic

Tips for ronja (robbers daughter)

Tips for buckets

Tips for deimos from madness combat

Tips for barney calhoun from half life 2

Thin man vibes

Tips fashion and recipes for a zim

Tips for fan (inanimate insanity)

Tips for sparrows

Tips for lions

Pronouns and activities for a barnowl

Tips for tardis

Tips for jordie holmes

Pastel pink robot moodboard

Neos for cryptids

Tips for jane doe

Tips for connecting to feeling catlike

Tips  and den inspo for a wood mouse

Tips for feral cats

Fashion for white cats (feral)

Tips for space

Tips for brown wolf, golden retriever, and demon

tips for a calico cat

Tips for a disabled red fox and honeybee

Tips for mothman

its pretty long right now! but we're getting through it!

-

🧪

[morally-grey-girlbosses]

Bracket is up! Matchups are in text form under the cut. Reminder that all of these matchups were chosen randomly, and that this bracket will be run in a double elimination style, so a character failing out in round one does NOT prevent them from proceeding into the tournament.

Ursula Boulton (Merge Mansion) vs. Betty Grof (Adventure Time)

Evelyn Wang (Everything Everywhere All At Once) vs. The Coin / Boss (Blaseball)

Morgan Le Fay (Fate) vs. Edelgard Von Hresvelg (Fire Emblem: Three Houses)

IMOGEN (Stellar Firma) vs. Amalexia (Elder Scrolls)

Maeby Funke (Arrested Development) vs. Manon Blackbeak (Throne of Glass)

Taylor Hebert / Skitter (Worm) vs. GLaDOS / Caroline (Portal)

Cleo DeNile (Monster High) vs. Nico Robin (One Piece)

Helen Richardson / The Distortion (The Magnus Archives) vs. Calanthe (The Witcher)

Irving Braxiatel (Thieves & Tardises) vs. Nefera DeNile (Monster High)

Alina Starkov (Shadow & Bone) vs. Lady Barbrey Dustin (A Song Of Ice & Fire)

Eclipsa Butterfly (Star vs. the Forces of Evil) vs. Jennifer Check (Jennifer’s Body)

Moira O’Deorain (Overwatch) vs. Captain Jack Sparrow (Pirates of the Carribbean)

Iron Maiden Jeanne (Shaman King) vs. Artemis (Greek Myth)

Tomie Kawakami (Tomie) vs. Dame Obsidian (Murdle)

Rachel (Animorphs) vs. Juri Han (Street Fighter)

Shego (Kim Possible) vs. Asajj Ventress (Star Wars)

Tabitha Scarlet (Scarlet Hollow) vs. Morte Asherah (Sands of Destruction)

Theresa (Fable) vs. Morgana Pendragon/Le Fey (BBC Merlin)

Nailgun Sue (IRL) vs. The Witch (Into the Woods)

Chara / The Fallen Human (Undertale) vs. Nimona (Nimona)

Klaasje Amandou (Disco Elysium) vs. Margot “gottiewrites” Garcia (An Unauthorized Fan Treatise)

Prince Ianthe Naberius the First, the Lyctor Prince, the Saint of Awe, previously known as Ianthe Tridentarius, the Princess of Ida, heir to the House of the Third, Mouth of the Emperor, the Procession, House of the Shining Dead (The Locked Tomb) vs. Baru Cormorant (The Masquerade Series)

Anna Croft (Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint) vs. Sailor Galaxia (Sailor Moon)

Ms. Pauling (Team Fortress 2) vs. Lady Alcina Dimitrescu (Resident Evil)

Charlie Magne/Morningstar (Hazbin Hotel) vs. Vriska Serket (Homestuck)

Willie Jack (Reservation Dogs) vs. Gretchen Klein (The Wilds)

Rachel (Tower of God) vs. Galadriel (Lord of the Rings)

Charlie (Don’t Starve) vs. Pomegranate Cookie (Cookie Run)

Rose Quartz / Pink Diamond (Steven Universe) vs. Filo (Shield Hero)

Tokiko Shigure (Ai: The Somnium Files) vs. Sandy (TokiDoki Cactus Friends)

Shion Sonozaki (Higurashi When They Cry) vs. Banica Conchita (Evillious Chronicles)

Mima (Touhou) vs. Yūko Ichihara (xxxHolic)

Yuno Gasai (Future Diary) vs. Laerynn Coramar-Seelie (Critical Role)

Riza Hawkeye (Fullmetal Alchemist) vs. Granny Weatherwax (Discworld)

Catherine Earnshaw (Wuthering Heights) vs. Susie Haltmann (Kirby: Planet Robobot)

Lae’Zel (Baldur’s Gate 3) vs. Starlight Glimmer (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic)

Dr. Frank-N-Furter (Rocky Horror Picture Show) vs. Angela (Library of Ruina)

Miranda Vanderbilt (Monster Prom) vs. Jinx (Arcane / League of Legends)

Rose Thorburn Jr. (Pact) vs. Eva (Umineko When They Cry)

Empress Phillipa Georgiou (Star Trek) vs. Shiv Roy (Succession)

Paige Duplass (The Silt Verses) vs. Akua Sahelian (A Practical Guide to Evil)

Poison Ivy (DCEU) vs. Nickel (IDW Transformers)

Joyce Messier (Disco Elysium) vs. Reagan Ridley (Inside Job)

Kalina (Fantasy High) vs. MegaGirl (Starship)

Sloane Parker (Eidolon Playtest) vs. Power (Chainsaw Man)

Marcille Donato (Dungeon Meshi) vs. Raiden Ei / Beelzebul (Genshin)

Patty Bladell (Insatiable) vs. Remy “Thirteen” Hadley (House MD)

Tanya von Degurechaff (The Saga of Tanya the Evil) vs. Fang Runin (The Poppy War)

Nomi Malone (Showgirls) vs. Han Sooyoung (Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint)

Wu Zetian (The Iron Widow) vs. Lariska (Bionicle)

Teresa Agnes (Maze Runner) vs. Emma Perkins (Hatchetfield Series)

Lucrecia Mux / Maligula (Psychonauts) vs. Nadja of Antipaxos (What We Do In The Shadows)

Akako Koizumi (Magic Kaito) vs. Junko Enoshima (Danganronpa)

Blackberry (Chicory: A Colorful Tale) vs. Malva (Pokemon)

Vermouth (Detective Conan) vs. Kumoko / Shiraori (So I’m a Spider So What)

Eleanor (Do Revenge) vs. Bryony Halbech (Red Valley)

Asuka Langley Soryu (Neon Genesis Evangelion) vs. Terezi Pyrope (Homestuck)

Leliana (Dragon Age) vs. Archbishop Rhea/Seiros (Fire Emblem: Three Houses)

Grimora (Inscryption) vs. Anthy Himemiya (Revolutionary Girl Utena)

Audrey Redheart (Wandersong) vs. Kyoko Sakura (Puella Magi Madoka Magic)

Fujiko Mine (Lupin III) vs. O-Ren Ishii (Kill Bill)

Anne (WOE.BEGONE) vs. Gwendolyn Poole (Marvel Comics)

Lappland Saluzzo (Arknights) vs. Avrana Kern (Children of Time)

Harley Quinn (DCEU) vs. Cassandra Jones (Rise of the TMNT)

Faith Lehane (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) vs. Rosalyne-Kruzchka Lohefalte / La Signora (Genshin Impact)

Revan (Star Wars) vs Rue Kuroha / Princess Kraehe (Princess Tutu)

Eve (The Bible) vs. Prospera Mercury (Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch From Mercury)

May Angelica Jones Goodwin (It Takes Two) vs. Elle Williams (The Last of Us)

Marina (Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas) vs. Naksu / Mudeok (Alchemy of Souls)

Patrick Bateman (American Psycho) vs. Sucre (OFF)

SHODAN (System Shock) vs. Cocolia (Honkai: Star Rail)

Alana Bloom (NBC Hannibal) vs. Halea Haumea (Phantomarine)

Delirium of the Endless (The Sandman) vs. Arcee (IDW Transformers)

Morganthe (Wizard 101) vs. Wu Zetian (History)

Jude Duarte (Folk of the Air) vs. Miranda Pryce (Wolf 359)

Perihelion/ART (The Murderbot Diaries) vs. Kanamori Sayaka (Keep your Hands off Eizouken!)

Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum (Adventure Time) vs. Anais Watterson (The Amazing World of Gumball)

Croix Meridies (Little Witch Academia) vs. Lady Macbeth (Macbeth)

Harrowhark Nonagesmius (The Locked Tomb) vs. Big Mama (Rise of the TMNT)

Katherine Pierce (The Vampire Diaries) vs. White Gladys the Orca (IRL)

Doctor Carmilla (Doctor Carmilla & the Mechanisms) vs. The Handler (Umbrella Academy)

Catra (She-Ra & The Princesses of Power) vs. Liliana Vess (Magic: The Gathering)

Jasnah Kholin (Stormlight Archive) vs. Liraz (Daughter of Smoke & Bone)

Lilith Clawthorne (TOH) vs. Medea (Greek Myth)

Odin (The Bifrost Incident) vs. Enma Ai (Jigoku Shoujo)

Mordred (Fate) vs. Nana Daiba (Revue Starlight)

Beatrice (Umineko When They Cry) vs. Hester Shaw (Mortal Engines)

Balalaika (Black Lagoon) vs. Any Female Praying Mantis (IRL)

Veronica Sawyer (Heathers) vs. W (Arknights)

Angelica Pickles (Rugrats/All Grown Up) vs. Eleanor Guthry (Black Sails)

Asha Rahiro (Kubera One Last God) vs. Willow Rosenberg (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

The Administrator (Team Fortress 2) vs. Shadowheart (Baldur’s Gate 3)

Noi (Dorohedro) vs. Leopardstar (Warrior Cats)

Sue Miley (Your Turn to Die) vs. Beatrix Kiddo (Kill Bill)

Juliette Cai (These Violent Delights) vs. Rat God (Mad Rat Dead)

Petra Solano (Jane the Virgin) vs. Kycilia Zabi (Mobile Suit Gundam)

Franziska Von Karma (Ace Attorney) vs. Monika (Doki Doki Literature Club)

Anne Boleyn (History) vs. Cinder Fall (RWBY)

Kokomi Teruhashi (Disastrous life of Saiki K) vs. Major Margaret Houlihan (M*A*S*H)

Mrs. Lovett (Sweeney Todd) vs. Enyo (Granblue Fantasy)

Claudia (Interview with the Vampire) vs. Essun/Syenite/Damaya (Broken Earth Trilogy)

Lady Eboshi (Princess Mononoke) vs. Lady Maria of the Astral Clocktower (Bloodborne)

Entrapta (She-Ra & The Princesses of Power) vs. Ilsa Faust (Mission: Impossible)

Princess Azula (Avatar: The Last Airbender) vs. Dahlia Hawthorne (Ace Attorney)

Samantha Groves / Root (Person of Interest) vs. Charlotte “Lottie” Matthews (Yellowjackets)

Shanoa (Castlevania) vs. Sally Reed (Barry)

Evil Lynn (He-Man) vs. Makima (Chainsaw Man)

Mabel Pines (Gravity Falls) vs. Raphaella La Coginzi (Doctor Carmilla & The Mechanisms)

Edalyn Clawthorne (The Owl House) vs. Yennefer of Vengerberg (The Witcher)

Toriel Dreemurr (Undertale) vs. Monaco (Hetalia: Axis Powers)

Elizabeth Swann (Pirates of the Carribbean) vs. Vala Mal Doran (Stargate)

Wanda Maximoff (MCU) vs. Adelina Amouteru (Young Elites)

Mapleshade (Warrior Cats) vs. Amy Dunne (Gone Girl)

Gertrude Robinson (The Magnus Archives) vs. Hornet (Hollow Knight)

Homura Akemi (Puella Magi Madoka Magica) vs. PearlescentMoon (Double Life SMP)

Lady Bone Demon (Lego Monkie Kid) vs. Annabeth Chase (Percy Jackson Series)

Jung Sun Ah (Devil Judge) vs. Muu Kusonoski (Milgram)

Romanadvoratrelundar (Doctor Who) vs. Electra (Starlight Express)

Rouge the Bat (Sonic the Hedgehog) vs. Akane Kurashiki (Zero Escape)

Wen Qing (The Untamed) vs. Yubel (Yu-Gi-Oh)

Ponyo (Ponyo) vs. Renata Glasc (League of Legends)

Aubrey (OMORI) vs. Menou (The Executioner and Her Way of Life)

Olivia Octavius (Into the Spiderverse) vs. Anna Limon (Mabel)

HG Wells (Warehouse 13) vs. The Shapeshifter (Odd Squad)

Miles “Tails” Prowler (Sonic the Hedgehog) vs. Isabella (Promised Neverland)

Riley Grace Davis / Bonesaw (Worm) vs. The Fairy Godmother (Shrek 2)

Misty Quigley (Yellowjackets) vs. Nami (One Piece)

Olivier Mira Armstrong (Fullmetal Alchemist) vs. Lucretia (The Adventure Zone: Balance)

[balioc]

BALIOC'S READING LIST, 2023 EDITION

This list counts only published books, consumed in published-book format, that I read for the first time and finished. No rereads, nothing abandoned halfway through, no Internet detritus of any kind, etc. Also no children’s picture books.

(There were so many children's picture books.)

Hand of the Sun King, J. T. Greathouse

Anne of Green Gables, Lucy Maud Montgomery

The Circus of Dr. Lao, Charles G. Finney

When the Angels Left the Old Country, Sacha Lamb

Strangers to Ourselves: Unsettled Minds and the Stories That Make Us, Rachel Aviv

Elder Race, Adrian Tchaikovsky

Yamada Monogatari: Troubled Spirits, Richard Parks

Victory City, Salman Rushdie

Achieving Our Country: Leftist Thought in Twentieth-Century America, Richard Rorty

Cage of Souls, Adrian Tchaikovsky

A Morbid Taste for Bones, Ellis Peters

One Corpse Too Many, Ellis Peters

Priest of Bones, Peter McLean

Priest of Lies, Peter McLean

Demon Summoner: Apprentice, Greg Walters

By the Sword: A History of Gladiators, Musketeers, Samurai, Swashbucklers, and Olympic Champions, Richard Cohen

Tsalmoth, Steven Brust

Priest of Gallows, Peter McLean

Priest of Crowns, Peter McLean

Waybound, Will Wight

Convenience Store Woman, Sayaka Murata

The Tatami Galaxy, Tomihiko Morimi

These Violent Delights, Chloe Gong

Death in Venice, Thomas Mann

Alchemy: The Dark Art and Curious Science of Creating Magic in Brands, Business, and Life, Rory Sutherland

The Man Who Was Thursday, G. K. Chesterton

Storming Heaven, Miles Cameron

Against Worldbuilding, and Other Provocations: Essays on History, Narrative and Game Design, Alexis Kennedy

From Ritual to Romance, Jessie L. Weston

To the Lighthouse, Virginia Woolf

Rats and Gargoyles, Mary Gentle

Labyrinth's Heart, M. A. Carrick

Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships, Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha

Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow, Gabrielle Zevin

The Long, Long Goodbye of "The Last Bookstore," Mizuki Nomura

The Last Sun, K. D. Edwards

The Hanged Man, K. D. Edwards

The Hourglass Throne, K. D. Edwards

Pinocchio, Carlo Collodi

The Thirteen Petalled Rose: A Discourse on the Essence of Jewish Existence and Belief, Adin Steinsaltz

The Lightning Thief, Rick Riordan

A City on Mars: Can We Settle Space, Should We Settle Space, and Have We Really Thought This Through?, Kelly and Zach Weinersmith

Untethered Sky, Fonda Lee

The Consolation of Philosophy, Boethius

The Star-Child, Oscar Wilde

Monk's Hood, Ellis Peters

St. Peter's Fair, Ellis Peters

The Leper of St. Giles, Ellis Peters

The Virgin in the Ice, Ellis Peters

The Nutcracker, E. T. A. Hoffman and Alexandre Dumas

The Sanctuary Sparrow, Ellis Peters

Child of God, Cormac McCarthy

The Devil's Novice, Ellis Peters

Dead Man's Ransom, Cormac McCarthy

Plausible works of improving nonfiction consumed in 2023: 10

["plausible" and "improving" are being defined very liberally here]

Balioc's Choice Award, Fiction Division: The Circus of Dr. Lao, Charles G. Finney

>>>> Honorable Mention: Rats and Gargoyles, Mary Gentle

[This seems like the correct place to point out that, for the Balioc's Choice Awards, I consider only works that were first published with the last 100 years. Otherwise it would just be "surprise, old classics are often classics for a reason."]

Balioc's Choice Award, Nonfiction Division: The Thirteen Petalled Rose: A Discourse on the Essence of Jewish Existence and Belief, Adin Steinsaltz

>>>> Honorable Mention: A City on Mars: Can We Settle Space, Should We Settle Space, and Have We Really Thought This Through?, Kelly and Zach Weinersmith

The Roscommon Princess Award for Luminous Trembling Beauty in the Face of a Bleakly Mundane World: The Star-Child, Oscar Wilde

The Anguished Howl Award for Somehow Making Me Regret Reading a Book About a Demon Summoner in the Thirty Years' War: Demon Summoner: Apprentice, Greg Walters

The Tamsyn Muir Award for Demonstrating that Popularity Really, Really, Really is Not the Same Thing as Quality: The Lightning Thief, Rick Riordan

The G. K. Chesterton Award for Being G. K. Chesterton, I Mean, to Whom Else Could I Compare Him, For Someone So Avowedly Stodgy He is the Ballsiest Motherfucker I Have Ever Read: The Man Who Was Thursday, G. K. Chesterton

**********

...this year was much like the last several years, only somehow even more so. Not in a good way, I fear. My current lifestyle continues not to be super-conducive to reading, and writing a weekendlong LARP kind of knocked the wind out of me, both during and after. If it weren't for a massive silly-fun historical-mystery binge in December, my numbers here would be shameful. And you will notice that a whole lot of the things on that list are very short.

Most of the contemporary fiction was pretty much what I expected it to be. There were few real standouts. Things by good authors continued to be mostly good; things by shlocky authors continued to be shlock.

I should probably drive less for my various solitary recreational jaunts, just so that I can spend more of that time with a book. I should definitely read more old stuff, because old stuff continues to be the most reliably rewarding. (The cream of the cream of the old stuff, anyway, which is...what you read.)

I continue to be Extremely In the Market for recommendations of really good, deeply-informative nonfiction.

[blazingstarrewrite]

Sand

Sand! Pretty girl

Name Changes: Sand

Pronouns: she/her/hers

(Former) Mentor(s): White Storm

(Former) Apprentice(s): -

(Ex-) Mate(s): -

Family Members: Rose Petal (Paternal grandmother on Red Tail’s side), Fog Snap (Paternal grandmother on Running Wind’s side), Sparrow Pelt (Paternal grandfather on Running Wind’s side), Spotted Leaf (Paternal aunt on Red Tail’s side), Mouse Fur (Paternal aunt on Running Wind’s side), Willow Branch (Paternal aunt on Red Tail’s side), Running Wind (Father), Red Tail (Father), Gray (Cousin), Dark Stripe (Cousin). Members shown in italics are deceased as of the start of into the wild.

Sand! I altered her characterization in my au quite a bit. I wanted to keep her a bratty teenager, but I wanted to lay the basis for FireSand quite early. One reason for her being so bratty is because she is part of a respected Thunder Colony lineage.

Other relatives: Fallow Song (Paternal great-great-grandmother on great-grandmother’s side on Red Tail’s side), Heron Wing (Paternal great-great-uncle on great-grandmother’s side on Red Tail’s side), Rabbit Leap (Paternal great-great-uncle on great-grandmother’s side on Red Tail’s side), Poppy Dawn (Paternal great-grandmother on Red Tail’s side), Squirrel Whisker (Paternal great-great-grandmother on great-grandfather’s side on Red Tail’s side), Eagle Storm (Paternal great-great-grandfather on great-grandfather’s side on Red Tail’s side), Wind Flight (Paternal great-grandfather on Red Tail’s side), Leaping Stag (Paternal great-grandfather on Running Wind’s side), Hare Pounce (Paternal great-grandmother on Running Wind’s side), Thistle Claw (Paternal great-uncle on Red Tail’s side), Sweet (Paternal great-aunt on Red Tail’s side), Dapple Tail (Paternal great-aunt on Red Tail’s side), Thrush Pelt (Paternal great-uncle on Red Tail’s side), Tawny Spots (Paternal great-uncle on Red Tail’s side), Feather Fall (First cousin once removed on Red Tail’s side), Cricket Song (First cousin once removed on Red Tail’s side), White Storm (First cousin once removed on Red Tail’s side),