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goodsology · 18 days

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Mental Health Wednesday

Hello! Time for another Mental Health Wednesday!

I want to share another fanfic with you guys. It's called "The Reason I Became An Idol". I wrote this one for Father's day of this year. Its a One Piece songfic about Uta and Shanks building their relationship.

Unlike the other fic I shared, this is not fandom blind. You have to Watch One Piece Film Red since the fic takes place after that. Plus, you need to listen to "You'll Be In My Heart" by Phil Collins (preferably both the English and Japanese versions, but at least the English version).

Also note: this fic is quite long (about 5,000 words and 2 chapters)

However, you can find another fandom blind fic I wrote here. I will share it again in another post, but if you can't read this fic, I highly recommend the second one. It's called "Ready, Set, Rock" and another fandom blind Fire Force fic.

Hope you enjoy it and I hope you have a great Wednesday! :)

Chapter 1

The storm wouldn't let up, and neither would the thunderstorms outside. Within an hour, there were 10 thunderstorms, one so close it almost hit the boat. After about the second strike, little Uta dashed to her father's room, eyes puffy and shaking.

Uta, who was only four years old, couldn't understand the raging storms that Shanks and his crew were accustomed to. If anything, the heavy rain and constant thunder rattled her enough to keep her awake and have her crying and huddling up to her father.

The man in question did his best to calm Uta, assuring her that the noises would stop soon, but it wasn't enough. While he didn't mind her crying, his crew, especially Uta, needed their sleep. He needed some way to calm her down and help her sleep through this terrible weather.

And that's when he remembered something. He always ran to Roger's room on nights like this with the same puffy eyes and shaken form. Yet, it seemed he was doing everything Roger used to.

Soothe her? Check. Blankets to keep her warm? Check. Keep her close? Check. A song?

Right, a song. Roger wasn't a musician but often sang to Shanks and Buggy, especially when they were scared.

How does it go again?

.......Oh, right!

"Come stop your crying. It will be alright~" Shanks stared down at Uta, wiping her tears as she looked up at him. Other than a sniffle, the music got her attention.

"Just take my hand. Hold it tight~" Shanks held out his left hand. Uta didn't hesitate, listening to her father's words and holding onto his hand with all her strength. After a moment, she puffed out her cheeks, focusing on her father's hand and holding it as tight as possible. He barely felt any pressure from her hands, much less pain, but appreciated her efforts.

He continued singing, wiping away the rest of her tears.

"For one so small, you seem so strong~" He let go of her hand for a second, holding his left hand and pretending he was in pain. Uta chuckled at her father's antics, clapping her hands and bouncing on the bed. Shanks continued his song to keep her entertained, pulling her into a warm embrace and rubbing her hair.

"I will be here. Don't you cry~"

It's incredible how a song could change considerably, from one amateur singing to his daughter to a professional singer with her background instruments and roaring fans cheering her on. He was lucky to be behind the curtains rather than the audience, or everyone would see a tall man in his thirties holding back his tears. However, he doubted anyone would blame him.

It was his daughter on stage, after all.

"Why can't they understand the way we feel? They don't trust what they can't explain~" He didn't realize how relatable this was until he remembered his days with Roger. Maybe it was the difference in hair color, that Roger was a pirate or both, but they would often get weird looks from civilians. Sometimes, he'd have people coming up to him and asking where his parents were or if he was okay. If he had any cuts and bruises from battles, the questions and concerns would double, some outright believing Roger caused them.

Shanks hated all this and responded coldly to these questions, but Roger was unfazed.

It was only when he adopted Uta that he finally understood. Anyone who was a pirate was seen as a criminal, they would hurt people, including children, to get what they wanted. This is why he would pay it no mind when people approach Uta to ask the same questions. Rare is it for adoption to occur on a pirate ship, except for slaves belonging to the pirates or intended for sale to celestial dragons.

Still, he wished the world would mind their own business.

Meanwhile, Uta's mind drifted to the same thing. Each lyric dug up a part of her past she wanted to forget. Growing up, Uta could never understand why strangers were concerned for her, even one nosy mother whisking her off to a cozy but unknown abode. It took Shanks disguising himself as a regular civilian to rescue Uta and finally get the mother off their backs.

Despite learning that pirates were awful and being abandoned at Elegia, she couldn't comprehend why it was wrong for a pirate to have a child. Her grandfather had not just Shanks but Buggy and, later on, Ace.

Still, maybe people thought pirates only saw children as slaves. She heard rumors from the townsfolk, that pirates kidnapped children to sell them as slaves or force them to work on their boats. Even stranger rumors popped up over the years she spent with the Red Haired Pirates, such as pirates using children for ‘emergency rations’. While dark, it made her laugh at how ridiculous adults were sometimes. Even Shanks entertained the idea and joked about chopping her up and putting her into his dinner. Or, depending on how well-behaved she was, he would joke about eating her for dessert. Of course, he only said these things around Uta and his crew.

Though it took time for her to get here, she wished the world would stop discriminating against pirates.

"Just look over your shoulders~" Uta always loved this part. She begged Shanks to sing this part repeatedly to hear it. It wasn't long before he noticed and repeated this part until she either fell asleep or his voice gave out on him. Sometimes, he didn't even have to sing the whole thing; just these few lines repeated multiple times was enough to put her to sleep or calm her down.

Uta remembered her father singing this one line for her, over and over again, as they were out in the rain. Shanks still had both arms back then, so he held an umbrella in one hand and another, keeping Uta on his back.

"Just look over your shoulders~" As she finished the last few lyrics, Uta eyed the crowd for her father, but he was nowhere in sight. A wave of fear washed over her, a memory of Shanks leaving her at Elegia. While she now understood his actions, the thoughts of her young self not being with him anymore, not having him sing to her or take care of her, just feeling it again opened up old wounds she couldn't fully recover from.

She held back tears as she tried burying the past, knowing Shanks would never abandon her again. He was here. She knew he was here.

He was always there.

Even when she was in Elegia, his thoughts drifted to her. It didn't matter whether he was partying with his crew, drinking, exploring the sea, or even fighting. In his free time, he would look in the direction of Elegia.

As the song ended, Uta found her father approaching the platform. Any applause from the audience turned into whispers and worried comments, but that would not stop Uta from giving her speech.

"Thank you, everyone," Uta started, "as you all know, Shanks is my father." She was silent for a moment, turning to her father and getting a nod of encouragement, "But, the truth is we're not related by blood. He found me in a treasure chest and took me in as his own. Since then, Shanks has been not only my captain but also my father. He took care of me whenever I was sick. He protected me against anyone who would do me harm. And, more importantly, he sang to me as often as he could. I wouldn't be here right now if it wasn't for him," She held up her hands, "so let's hear it for Shanks of the Red-Haired Pirates!" Everyone in the crowd cheered. Even those who still hated pirates for looting their villagers and hurting their loved ones clapped their hands at the pirate captain on stage.

Uta handed her father the mic, urging him to say a few words for the crowd. Despite his speech at Marineford, he wasn't prepared for this. Still, he couldn't refuse and let his daughter down. He had to be the cool father, after all.

"Thank you for coming here and supporting my daughter. I can't thank all of you enough. But I do not deserve all the praise. I know nothing about music and would sing to her like my father did."

He made sure to leave out his father's name, of course.

"But Uta would've never come this far without her singing instructor and guardian, Gordon." he motioned his hand to the front row where Gordon was sitting. The lights above shined over as the crowd gave him a standing ovation. Gordon was taken aback by this but slightly waved.

"Over a decade ago, something happened. Uta was involved in that incident," and he didn't say it was her fault. Because it wasn't. He would argue and even fight anyone who would say otherwise.

"But at the time, I and my crew took the blame for everything, even lying to Uta and leaving her with Gordon. At the first, I believed it was for the best, that I was only trying to protect her, but I wasn't thinking of how she felt. I caused her so much unnecessary pain and failed as her father."

"W-wait, you don't have to-" Uta preferred a private apology more than a public one. She didn't care how this would affect her future concerts, but she did care how this would look for Shanks. He was not just the emperor of the sea, but had many allies who looked up to him. They barely knew about his alleged attack on Elegia, but after learning the truth, would they still love him? Would this ruin any relationships he's made over his pirate career?

"It was my job as your father to protect and take care of you. However, I failed to do both." Shanks continued, facing his daughter. He didn't care about the consequences: what mattered was giving her a long, overdue apology for the pain and suffering he caused, "It was the worst thing I've ever done, and I wouldn't blame you if you never forgave me."

After a month of traveling with the Red Hair Pirates again, Uta chose to go back to Elegia. She worked to repair her own reputation, going back to her online performances to her first concert since everything with tot Musica. She set up this concert on Father's Day. She made sure to invite Shanks and his crew, making it known on their personalized invitation that she wanted them, especially her father, to be there. Uta, with Gordon's assistance, reached out to Shanks. She cheerfully told him about the concert, acting like nothing ever happened. A month couldn't fix their relationship and only put a wedge between them, both too focused on their own guilt to move forward.

Now, while Uta worked on herself and moved past her guilt, Shanks couldn't do the same. He spent years regretting his actions, wishing we could go back, but knew there was nothing else he could do besides apologize. A part of him wanted to be in her life, but doubted that Uta would've wanted the same, especially after returning to Elegia.

"D-dad…" she clutched Shanks's shirt, her face buried into his chest. The tears she was holding back came flowing out, staining his shirt. "I forgive you. I forgave you a long time ago."

He felt grateful hearing her words, but he didn't deserve it. Her forgiveness couldn't justify their broken relationship. Still, it was Uta's choice to give him another chance, and he was more than willing to take it. The first step was dealing with the awkward situation. Uta was in no condition to sing, and her fans watched, exchanging concerned looks, and wondering if the concert was over. It would be a shame if everyone came here for one song and had to leave early....

Probably the only time he thought an extra hand was necessary. Luckily, Beckman sprinted onto the stage with a mic handle. He gave his captain a salute and left the stage.

Thank goodness for a pirate crew…

After setting the mic close enough and adjusting to his height, he turned back to Uta, who was just as confused as the crowd.

"Come stop your crying. It will be alright~" Like all those years ago, Shanks wiped the tears from her face. Uta smiled as it seemed the song caught her attention again.

"Just take my hand. Hold it tight~" he held out his right hand, regretting losing his left for a second. But, he would have to make do. He could use haki for an arm but feared it would freak out the crowd. Besides, what father would have his daughter touch a fake hand and not his real one?

Uta held his hand, puffing up her cheeks just like before. Only this time, he felt more than pressure from his hands. All that haki training he did for her worked wonders. She must've continued her training in between her music lessons.

"For one so small, you seem so strong~" His pain was real this time, his eyes squinting and fanning his hand in pain. But he congratulated not only her strength but how far she'd come. She went from that tiny baby in a treasure chest to a beautiful, strong, talented young woman.

She could tell she lacked strength every time she held his hand, but Shanks congratulated her for her efforts. He was a kind man who always acknowledged her, but she wanted more than anything to prove herself: to know it would one day bear fruit. When that day finally came, tears came out of her once again.

The audience laughed. How could an emperor of all people be so weak? But they figured it was for their entertainment, and he was faking it.

He held his daughter closer, mic in hand, as he continued singing. He closed his eyes, letting the words flow out of him while Uta cried in his arms. It was a sight that brought most people to tears, even the Strawhat pirates. Zoro fought back tears as he remembered Koushiro, his only father figure. Sanji thought fondly of Jeff, Dr. Hiriluk for Chopper, Clover for Robin, Tom for Franky. Nami thought of Genzo, wishing to see him after their journey. Brook, even after so long, remembered his dad's mustache and how he taught him how to get a woman to show her panties. Usopp and Yasopp, both a crying mess, held each other, Yasopp whispering apologies for the lost time. Usopp kept forgiving him but also whispered out his own frustrations about Yasopp leaving him and his ill mother. Garp and Shanks came to Luffy's mind as he fought back tears, gently gripping his Strawhat. He also wanted nothing more than to sing with his role model, but he knew not to interfere in their moment.

The crowd thought of their own families, their parents, and the love they shared. Those without thought of their friends and parental figures. There wasn't a single dry eye in the area and outside of the concert hall.

The world received a broadcast of the concert, from the New World islands to the small port villages across the four blues.

Makino wiped her eyes as her husband held her and their newborn. The mayor and Dadan embraced each other, fighting back the tears.

Kaido stopped drinking, listening intently. Even his crew listened with wet eyes. Kaido himself thought fondly of Whitebeard, feeling slight guilt for planning to go to Marineford and slay him. Shanks's song made him think of the times that Whitebeard was there for him. In a way, he was the closest thing he had to a father. Kaido did not cry, he was too proud for that, but his eyes sweat immensely.

"Dammit Red Hair..." Garp grumbled, tears streaming down his cheeks. He was in his office, blowing his nose and trying not to break down.

The Cross Guild had the exact same atmosphere. Tears from Crocodile to Mihawk, with Buggy crying, grumbling Shanks's name over and over. How dare Shanks remind Buggy of not just their old lullaby, or of Roger, but Rayleigh.

Blackbeard and his men were also listening, on their ship once partying but now were all crying. They sat around their den den mushi, each thinking about their fathers. Blackbeard thought of Whitebeard. For a second, he regretted his actions at Marineford. Could things have been different? What if he didn't kill Thatch? What if he didn't turn in Ace? What if he apologized to Whitebeard instead of killing him? It was too little too late to ask these questions, but he couldn't help but envy what Uta had. In a way, it was what he lost. Even as he was now, deep in his heart, he wanted the same thing Whitebeard was striving for: a family.

Somehow, there was a den den mushi in Impel Down, echoing Shanks's voice throughout the prison. Prisoners picked up that it was an Emperor, but that didn't matter. They were also enchanted, crying and thinking about their parents. Even Doflamingo shed a single tear, remembering his father.

It even brought the Gorosei to tears. Despite living for centuries, they remembered their fathers. Saturn reminisced about a telescope his father bought for him. Mars was the first brought to tears, feeling his once small frame resting on his guardian's lap as they sat in the meadow under the bright stars. Warcury gripped his arm, watching his papa on top of another adult, punching them relentlessly for breaking his arm. Warcury was falsely accused of stealing a farmer's crops, causing the farmer to go after him, but his papa took his side without hesitation.

Nusjuro relished in those peaceful days when he helped his dad work. They were impoverished merchants, with no stable home and barely sold enough to get by, but he was happy. Peter, the last one to finally break down, still felt the taste of roasted potatoes, along with the reward from hard work and a parent's love. That was the first potato he ever grew. He could still smell the potato on the fire as he and his father planted more crops together.

Chapter 2

As the final notes of the song echoed through the stadium, Shanks's voice lingered in the air. The crowd erupted in applause, tears of joy streaming down everyone's faces.

Before Shanks could respond, he noticed his daughter's sleepy form below him. He tightened his grip around her, making sure she didn't fall. It wasn't long after that Beckman came back on stage, taking the mic from his captain and ushering him backstage. With a gentle smile, Shanks whispered his gratitude to his first mate and exited the stage, Uta still cradled in his arm.

Backstage, the crowd's applause slowly faded into a gentle hum, listening to Beckman's speech concluding the special Father's Day concert and adding a cliché about the bonds between a father and daughter. He even said, 'If possible, let us all strive for a relationship like what we've been shown today. Though not related by blood, Shanks and Uta have transcended the father-daughter bond.'

He couldn't wait to bully Benny boy over his little speech. For now, though, Shanks wanted nothing more than to stay with Uta. He rested her head on his lap, smiling as she snoozed under him.

'To think you did all of this for me. Thank you, Uta.' Shanks thought, giving her a soft kiss on the forehead. He then took off his cloak and used it as a makeshift blanket for her, as it was fairly chilly backstage.

He missed these small moments, those days of her resting on his lap on the deck of their ship, watching her sleep peacefully as the crisp, ocean air filled his nostrils. He didn't know why, but his mind went back to where it all began: at 18, on a small ship with his small crew in the middle of the ocean and after robbing a bunch of pirates. He and Beckman expected gold and jewels, but a crying baby? That was new, but not unheard of, as Shanks himself was found in a chest.

After the initial shock, he chuckled at the situation, eagerly taking on this new addition to his crew, much to Beckman's reluctance. While he wasn't trying to be cruel, his first mate thought of other options, like finding the village the pirates robbed in the hopes of locating her parents or other relatives, dropping her off at a clinic, or even leaving her at a random doorstep and praying the random civilian raises her well. Actually, that was Roux's suggestion, but even Beckman agreed with it. Luckily, Shanks kept his word, knowing how the baby could change the dynamic of the crew and change how they could work as pirates.

During Uta's early years, Shanks and Beckman took turns raising her, often staying on the ship to watch her. Soon, the rest of the crew took a more active role in raising Uta. At first, Shanks didn't blame them for opting out of the role, even Yasopp, who felt a tinge of guilt raising another child while abandoning his own, but they all volunteered while doing their normal work around the ship. Roux offered to cook for her, Gab made different toys she could play with, Yasopp offered to play with her whenever she was bored around the ship, Hongo taught her basic survival skills, various types of edible plants, how to make a fire, fish, etc., Bonk played her music (oddly it could never stop Uta from crying), and Building Snake taught her how to swim.

Of course, after eating a Devil Fruit, Shanks bought her a whistle to use just in case she ever falls into the water. Uta would often walk along the end of the ship, gradually learning to balance herself and worrying everyone, including Shanks. It was one of many behaviors that he simply had to accept with Uta. While he made sure she wasn't causing trouble for others, her somewhat adventurous and reckless actions couldn't be completely erased.

He remembered Roger buying him and Buggy all kinds of sweets and toys. Once he heard Rayleigh scolding Roger for his reckless spending and 'spoiling the kids'. They sounded like a married couple. Still, the cycle repeated itself, only with Shanks scolded by his first mate for buying too many clothes and accessories for his daughter.

Shanks couldn't help it. Uta looked adorable in anything she wore. And the more she gleefully accepted sweets or other gifts, the more he wanted to give her. Hell, he would give her the moon if it made her smile. But, Beckman helped keep him in check. Being the responsible one, he took charge of the ship's finances, giving Shanks a 'parental allowance', not including any jewelry or gold obtained from treasure chests. The number of pirate ships ransacked just to please his precious daughter would probably give someone a heart attack, but since they were pirates, Beckman took no issue with this.

The years came and went, with Uta becoming who she is today. Shanks didn't know when, but he felt warm tears streaming down his face and onto his cloak. There were days when he struggled as a parent, even days he questioned if he was raising her right, but he never regretted his decision to keep her. He never regretted finding her in a chest. To him, it was the best thing that ever happened to him.

Uta had done so much for him, and yet, what did he give her in return? He stripped all of the love and support he provided for her in one night.

What if he never abandoned her that night? What if he at least gave Gordon his vivre card or kept something for Uta to communicate with him and their crew? What if he took her with him and still took the blame? What if something happened to her on Elegia? What if Gordon wasn't the nice person he thought he was and harmed Uta?

Time passed, and Uta stirred in his arms, slowly waking up. Her father's cries became more clear as she woke up. They were controlled so she wouldn't be disturbed. However, he kept his eyes closed with his hand covering half his face.

She knew her concert was over, but an idol's work was never done. Or, was it a daughter's work?

"Come stop your crying, it'll be alright~" she started singing, wiping the tears from his eyes. She kept her voice slow, but gentle, making sure to copy the same voice and movements as her father. Shanks opened his eyes to face Uta. Unlike most of the time, he seemed unsure. She correctly guessed that this guilt ran deeper than she thought. She knew her performance wasn't enough to repair their relationship, but that's why she had a backup plan.

"Uta, I don't-"

"Just take my hand. Hold it tight.~" She sat up, forming a gentle smile as she held out her left hand. After a moment, he slowly took her hand. At first, he tried not to grip too hard, but after she refused to sing until he obeyed her instructions, he gripped with all his might. To his surprise, it didn't harm Uta at all. She had more than enough armament haki to handle his grip.

She continued her song, placing her head beside Shanks as he felt a familiar feeling of exhaustion.

After closing his eyes, there were two things he noticed. For one thing, he had both of his arms. And, he still had his strawhat.

"We're in your dream world?" Shanks asked.

Uta shook her head, "not exactly. It's in a dream, but I managed to connect a part of your memories with my dreams." She frowned, noticing her now child body. "Thanks to that, I'm a kid again."

"I can tell." He wasted no time in embracing her, rubbing their cheeks together, "you should do this more often!"

She grumbled, letting him have his fun before he finally let go. Once he did, she cleared her throat. "Apparently, this is why you'll never accept my forgiveness." She sighed, sitting on the railing, looking out on the town of Elegia. "I don't get it. Why here of all places?"

"When I asked if you would rather stay here, you made your decision very clear," he paused, "painfully clear, but, after what happened, I never gave it a second thought."

She remembered this moment and the feelings she felt at the time. She loved music, but she was a musician of the Red Hair Pirates. That's where she wanted to be and just the thought of leaving Shanks and everyone else behind frightened her. She would've never thought that her fears would become a reality.

"Is that it?" She was oddly apathetic to it, making Shanks chuckle.

"What do you mean that's it? It's the whole reason I'm the world's worst father!"

"Maybe the world's most absentee father, but not the worst." Uta continued, "Shanks." Her passionate and defiant tone caught Shanks's attention, "I miss you and being a part of your crew. The only reason I left was to work on myself and my career as an idol. But even then, I wanted to do something special, something to get you to let me in!" She stomped her foot, fighting back tears as she resembled her old self.

It was at this moment that Shanks knew: he messed up. At least, he realized how much of a fool he was. A part of him forgot that Uta wasn't a child anymore. She wasn't the child he left at Elegia, but a grown woman who was trying to reach out to him. She even had to look into his memories with her devil fruit. How she managed to do that he'll never know, but she must've worked hard practicing her singing and her devil fruit powers.

He bent down, pulling her into a hug, "I'm sorry Uta. I was so worried about hurting you again that I only ended up making another mistake."

They embraced tightly, the bond between them stronger than ever. Shanks felt the weight of his guilt finally lift.

As they held each other, the dream world seemed to fade away. In that moment, it was just the two of them, a father and his daughter, united by love and forgiveness. The two were finally ready to move on from the past, ready to face whatever the future held, together.

Just some bonus stuff I wanted to add at the end. Feel free to skip or read it!

Shanks: U-T-A! UTA!!!!

Uta: Dad, what the hell are you wearing???

Shanks: All of your merch. What's wrong with that? (he's wearing the same thing Bepo wore in Film Red)

Uta: Don't tell me you're gonna wear that during my performance...

Shanks: Yes! Why?

Uta: Take it off (glaring at him)

Shanks: NO! (pouting)

Uta: WHY???!!

Shanks: Because I love you!

Uta: More like you love embarrassing me! Take that stuff off!

Shanks: No, and you can't make me- (Beckman, Yasopp, and Roux grab him) what are you guys doing? Let go of me!

Uta: You guys are a lifesaver!

Beckman: Don't mention it.

Yasopp: Sorry cap, but today, we gotta look after Uta.

Shanks: Guys let me go n-(Roux covers his mouth. They ignore his screams and cusses as they take him back to the ship to change)

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