#a collection of my favorite ellis quotes:

[jelliedoodles]

little cowboy!nanami sketch for the beloved birthday boy @otterlis 💜💜

[clickvibes]

Apple Music unwraps new 'Carols Covered' Holiday Playlist

New Holiday Covers By Bnxn, Coco Jones, Armani White, Ella Henderson, Hemlocke Springs, Jeongyeon from TWICE And More Now Live Exclusively On Apple Music in Spatial Audio'Classical Carols Covered' available for Apple Music Classical subscribers and highlights new festive songs arranged and performed by classical music’s finest artists. 'Carols Covered is back again with a new line-up of exclusive to Apple Music holiday songs reimagined by some of contemporary music’s most impactful artists, plus an additional Classical Carols Covered playlist, highlighting beautiful new versions of carols and festive songs performed by top classical artists. All available in immersive Spatial Audio.Carols are at the heart of Christmas and other holidays—whether sung at festive services or simply bellowed out at home with friends and family. Carols may be a part of our well-established traditions, but they’re also constantly evolving, with new arrangements composed every year that bring freshness and vitality to old favorites. This year’s batch includes new selections from Ángela Aguilar, Armani White, Bnxn, Coco Jones, David Shaw, Dikka, Elevation Worship, Ella Henderson, Gallant & Jensen McRae, G Flip, Hakushi Hasegawa, Hemlocke Springs, Jeongyeon of TWICE, Lauren Spencer Smith and Restless Road.Previous Carols Covered collections have featured contributions from names like Amelia Moore, Ari Lennox, Arlo Parks, beabadoobee, Brett Eldredge, charlieonafriday, Elio, Ellie Goulding, Eslabon Armado, Fletcher, GIVĒON,glaive, James Blake, Jvck James, Katie Gregson-MacLeod, Mickey Guyton, Muni Long, Ozuna, RAYE, Shenseea, Shygirl, SiR, Tate McRae and Victoria Monét,and Yahritza Y Su Esencia.And back to Apple Music this year, Classical Carols Covered, featuring beautiful, brand-new versions of carols and festive songs performed by a handful of the best and brightest in the classical world. The full Classical Carols Covered playlist will also be available to subscribers on the new Apple Music Classical app. This year’s collection features heartwarming arrangements from Maria Duenas, Olivia Belli, Randall Goosby & Carlos Simon, The Sixteen, and Xuefei Yang as they perform well-known Christmas music alongside a couple of lesser-known gems and bring their incredible musicianship to these carols. Carols Covered Track ListLauren Spencer Smith, “Hallelujah"Coco Jones, "8 Days of Christmas"Armani White, "Two Front Teeth"Elevation Worship, "Here Come Heaven"Restless Road, "Mary, Did You Know?"David Shaw feat. Keilana, "Male Kalikimaka"Hemlocke Springs, "Christmastime is Here"Gallant & Jensen McRae, "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas"Ángela Aguilar, "Te Deseo Muy Felices Fiestas"Jeongyeon of TWICE, "O Christmas Tree”Bnxn, "Joy To The World"Dikka, "Eine Muh, Eine Mäh"Ella Henderson, "Stay Another Day"G Flip, "Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home)"Hakushi Hasegawa, "Wonderful Christmastime"Classical Carols Covered Track ListRandall Goosby & Carlos Simon, "The Christmas Song"Maria Duenas, "El Chant Del Ocells"Xuefei Yang, "Ave Maria"The Sixteen, "Bethlehem Down"Olivia Belli, "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen"Artist Quotes BNXN, “Joy to the World”“My choirmaster would make a funny face whenever he’s singing, ‘And heaven and nature sings,’” Nigerian singer-songwriter BNXN tells Apple Music. “It’s like he tried to make a baritone voice and he makes this funny face and sometimes it distracts the whole band. That’s a memory I don’t think I could ever forget, because it’s a very happy one.”Coco Jones, “8 Days of Christmas”“It’s so impactful when a genre and a holiday really mesh perfectly,” singer-songwriter Coco Jones tells Apple Music. “I feel like that’s the foundation for a classic holiday song, and ‘8 Days of Christmas’ is a classic.”Elevation Worship, “Here Comes Heaven”For their contribution to this season’s curated selection of holiday songs, the Christian worship group reimagined their 2018 hit song “Here Comes Heaven” from their live album Hallelujah Here Below. “We’re really excited about having this version of our song mixed in Spatial Audio,” Elevation Worship singer Chris Brown tells Apple Music. “Knowing it would be experienced that way gave us extra creative incentive and license to throw unique sounds and instruments around in different places.” Ángela Aguilar, “Te Deseo Muy Felices Fiesta”“I think that ‘Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas’ is a beautiful song that embodies positivity and love and gratitude and a message of ‘everything is going to get better’—and I love that,” Mexican American singer Ángela Aguilar tells Apple Music. “‘Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas’ has always been a part of our Christmas playlist in the house, and it's a song that we all get to sing, and it’s part of my childhood. This song has really grown with me.”Armani White, “All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth”“I chose ‘Two Front Teeth’ because I used to have a silver tooth when I was a kid,” rapper Armani White tells Apple Music. “I wanted to find a record that could still bring that childlike kid energy into Christmas.”Ella Henderson, “Stay Another Day”“I wanted to produce up this record and do it very differently to the original, but still stick to the original structure,” English singer-songwriter Ella Henderson tells Apple Music. “I wanted to add a few more gospel elements to it, really strip it right back to just myself and a piano. We've got an incredible string arrangement on there, and I think altogether, it just has this really beautiful, minimalistic element, but it also extends to this heightened emotional state.”G Flip, “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)”“I chose to cover ‘Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)’ because I just love the song,” Australian singer-songwriter G Flip tells Apple Music. “It’s a banger of a Christmas carol. The Darlene Love version is really awesome, and her wailing vocals on it, how she just lets it rip, especially in the outro, is so great.”Lauren Spencer Smith, “Hallelujah”“I’ve always loved singing ‘Hallelujah,’ and there’s so many different versions of it that so many different artists have created,” Canadian singer-songwriter Lauren Spencer Smith tells Apple Music. “I love singing this song around the holidays, but as a kid, I sang this song all the time at singing competitions and for my mom in the kitchen, so I thought it would be really cool to do a recorded version of this as I got older for Christmas.”Hemlocke Springs, “Christmas Time Is Here”“I think music is one of the biggest reasons why I really enjoy Christmas,” singer-songwriter Hemlocke Springs tells Apple Music. “Christmas music just hits really hard for no reason. It just hits so hard in the feelings. Even with the song I cover, ‘Christmas Time Is Here,’ it can bring me into a happy, joyful, and melancholic state all at the same time. It’s like I’m looking back on memories that have happened in the past and also looking forward to the future. Christmas music just enhances those feelings for me.”Jensen McRae feat. Gallant, “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”“It taps into what I love most about all Christmas music and what I try to tap into in my music, which is this sense of nostalgia,” singer-songwriter Jensen McRae tells Apple Music. “It reaches back in time in this really beautiful way, but also doesn’t feel dated.” For this year’s Carols Covered, McRae opted to cover the classic track “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas,” and enlisted some help from Maryland singer-songwriter Gallant. “‘Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas’ is one of those classic quintessential Christmas songs,” Gallant says. “It’s probably my favorite Christmas song. It doesn’t go too deep into the symbolism or the technicalities or the religious aspect of the holiday, and as a result, you get a song that, at least for people who celebrate Christmas, is very universal. It talks about gathering with your friends and family, being grateful to be able to spend that time together.”Jeongyeon of TWICE, “O Christmas Tree”“I thought it could bring back some sweet holiday memories for everyone while they listen to my cover,” TWICE member Jeongyeon tells Apple Music. “‘O Christmas Tree’ is one of my must-listen holiday songs. And it takes me back to those comfy times hanging out with my friends and family enjoying the holiday vibes together.”*****Randall Goosby & Carlos Simon, “The Christmas Song”Randall Goosby (violin): “Nat King Cole’s "The Christmas Song" has always been a favourite Christmas carol of mine. He’s the epitome of smooth, suave warmth—everything you’d want to associate with the holidays. I thought it would be the perfect occasion to blend the smoothness of Nat King Cole with the smoothness of the great Carlos Simon to create this wonderful arrangement for you all.” Carlos Simon (piano and arranger): “Of course, I thought of Nat King Cole, the swooning strings and the lush harmonic structure, but I wanted to create something that’s quite Debussy- or Ravel-like in my arrangement, with lush arpeggios and sort of a swooning melody line.”Xuefei Yang, “Ave Maria”“Just as good movies must have soundtracks to enhance the feelings, for me great holidays must have music to enrich the soul and relax the mind. I find the melody of Schubert’s "Ave Maria" so beautiful and touching, which is perhaps why it has been adopted over the years for many occasions, including Christmas. I arranged Schubert’s piece for two guitars, and I play both parts myself, using one guitar as my voice and the other to accompany. Lyricism is one of my trademarks, and this piece gives me the opportunity to really make the guitar sing.”The Sixteen & Harry Christophers, “Bethlehem Down”Harry Christophers (conductor): “I’ve always loved the music of Peter Warlock, and this particular carol has a special place in my heart—I remember singing it when I was a student at Oxford University. Peter Warlock composed Bethlehem Down in 1927 as an entry into The Daily Telegraph’s carol-writing competition when Warlock was in financial difficulty, and he won. I think that’s just brilliant! "Warlock’s version is just four verses for a cappella choir—what we’ve done is just add piano and violin interludes between each verse in a very atmospheric style. I think Peter Warlock would have been very pleased we did this.”Olivia Belli, “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen”“God Rest You Merry Gentlemen" is not from my own tradition, but its melody attracted me because of its noble and archaic character. I really like its implicit harmonic possibilities, which allow me to play between major and minor, between sweet and bitter. "In the holidays, we have our own ritual regarding music: in the morning, while we decorate the house or cook or wrap gifts, we love lively and rhythmic music. After lunch, which represents for us a moment of pause, we like to listen to smooth songs with a winter mood, while in the evening it’s time for traditional, sacred songs.”Maria Dueñas, “El cant del ocells”Maria Dueñas (violin): “El cant dels ocells " was made famous by the great Spanish cellist Pablo Casals, and is a traditional Catalan song and lullaby. The original text speaks of nature’s joy at learning of the birth of Jesus, with many birds gathering to celebrate. I associate Christmas with spending time with my family and having time to reflect, so I chose a work with a nostalgic and intimate feeling—the feeling of going back home.”Carols Covered playlist link: apple.co/carolscovered Read the full article

[okokokaythen]

NSR Headcanons

Aka NSR themed shower thoughts 

Bunkbed junction (Mayday + Zuke)

Mayday

- Has a secret stash of 1010 merch hidden in the sewer that she hides from Zuke (He already knows and doesn’t tell May to entertain her)

- Sometimes call Zuke, ‘Zukie’ after the DK west encounter(s) 

- She is banned from babysitting Yinu (for obvious reasons)

- She sleeps on the top bunk 

- She memorizes small things about people and will sometimes give gifts as a token for forgiveness after the events of the story

- She sometimes hangs on the pipes in the sewer instead of sitting on the couch (much to Zukes annoyance)

- She occasionally wears Zuke’s clothes 

Zuke

- Occasionally leaves the sewer alone to walk around or reflect on things

- Has a collection of books ranging from scientific journals to biographies, not exactly a fan of fiction

- Used to own a pair of glasses before he switched to contacts, after which they’ve gone missing

- Tries to organize and clean the sewer, but it being a sewer he hasn't gotten much done

- Occasionally visits eve to catch up and make amends

- Zuke is May’s primary impulse control

- He’s near the top of the list to babysit Yinu, behind Sayu/Tila

Both: 

- They have seen each other naked at some point with opposite reactions. 

- They take turns cooking 

- They style each other’s hair in the morning

- They refer Ellie as their baby

NSR 

DJSS

- He is Yinu’s homeschool teacher

- Owns a cat named Mars 

- Has a mixed relationship with 1010

- Tolerates Green 1010 the most

- increase size whenever he’s mad

- Sayu often appears on his screens to annoy him or just hang out

- He tolerates Sayu more than 1010

- He’s 1010′s pseudo uncle

- Undefeated in basketball 

Sayu 

- Is Yinu’s primary babysitter 

- Sayu, when not piloted, has an A.I. But is limited to cyberspace. 

- Her reverse form was made as a joke by Remi

- She knows a lot more than she leads on, and has appeared even on Tatiana’s computer, but she's ultimately harmless. 

- She’s often tasked to work as a firewall for NSR’s servers 

- She is surprisingly useful to have around.  

- There’s several platforms where Sayu can ‘Appear’ physically, similar to Cortana from Halo.

Yinu / Mother

- Yinu is homeschooled

- DJSS is her Homeroom/Science teacher, Neon J is her Shop/P.E teacher. Eve is her Art and Literature teacher, Mother is her Math/History teacher. Tatiana occasionally is her Economics/Math teacher whenever she’s not too busy.

- Sayu’s pilots and 1010 are her ‘classmates’ 

- She, along with Mother, visits her father’s grave at least once a month. 

- She does not like being picked up by anyone other than her mother. so she carries around a step stool.

- She likes that she has multiple babysitters, but wont admit it.

- Tatiana is her god mother/ grandmother figure

1010 / Neon J

-  Yellow often gets stuck on Green’s hoop

- Each member of 1010′s “brain” is a chip that is inserted into their head

- They are referred to by their color’s (I know they got names but I’m terrible at remembering them)

- White often gets picked on for watching Danny Phantom

- They had small ‘baby’ forms and as they ‘aged’ their chips/minds into different ‘aged up’ forms 

- Blue was the first designed but last built, white was built first.

- Red’s mohawk used to snap off a lot so recently its been made of a more durable but heavier. this makes Red slower than the rest of 1010

- Whenever 1010 cause chaos, Green and Neon J are often the ones to apologizing for their actions. 

- Neon J often refers to 1010 as Teletubbies, which annoys them.

- Neon originally wanted 1010 to be fighter pilots rather than sailors but knew how marketable sailors are so swapped the design. 

- When ever Neon J is ‘off duty’ he turns into the socks with sandals dad. making dad jokes left and right. 

Eve

- She sometimes visits the sewer hideout and is always grossed out but keeps it to herself to not upset Mayday/Zuke

- She still acts cold towards May, but she is warming up and is in general nicer 

- She sleeps in a giant hand shaped bed 

- Her entire house’s furniture is just hands and other abstract shapes

- She has several outfits based in other art movements, like surrealism (my favorite movement) and cubism for example

- Mayday and Zuke have spent the night there several times, Mayday has trouble sleeping due to the furniture

- Eve still reminisces when she and Zuke were together, but is still supportive of Zuke and Mayday’s relationship (romantic or otherwise)

(I do ship Mayzuke/Bunkbed lovers but I’m trying to not make it center stage in this post)

- After spending time with Mayday, she realizes she has more in common with her and often joke in Zuke’s expense

- Tatiana is a mentor figure to Eve, and if/when Tatiana retires, Eve will be her successor. 

Tatiana

- She often quotes Yzma around her collogues, such as, “I know its called a cruel irony, like my dependence on you.” to DK West

- She’s grown more laid back after the events of the story, but is still stern while working

- Sometimes she jams out with BBJ and even give pointers to Mayday

- If/When she retires she becomes more grandmotherly towards her collogues

- She often slows/stops time during meetings to take a breath/ get a drink or snack

DK West

- Whenever he is not working in his field, He often crashes at the sewer hideout 

- When he opens his eyes, his true power is revealed

- His Shadow bull (stand) sometimes appears and vibes with him

- He probably sleeps with his mouth opened 

- This man is vibes first 

- He radiates the same energy as the Giga-Chad meme

[sakuramidnight15]

-RSA MC Information-

[Gacha Club Ver. Below]

Character Bio

Name: Westyn Hashimoto

(Japanese: ウェスティン橋本)

Romaji: U~esutin Hashimoto

Quote: "Actions like yours aren't reliable, any word I say will be only in my plans."

V/A: Takahiro Sakurai (Japanese)

Austin Tindle (English)

Gender: Male

Age: 17

Birthday: July 28

Star Sign: Leo

Eye Color: Mustard Yellow

Hair Color: Coffee Brown

Height: 179 cm

Race: Human

Homeland: Crystalsle Village (The fifth country in the Island of Enchantment)

Family: Kirsten Hashimoto (Father)

Anne Young (Mother)

Ellis Hashimoto (Aunt)

______________________________________

School Status and Fun Facts

Dorm: TBA (If There's RSA Canon Dorms in the game)

School Year: Second

Class: 2-A (Same class with Harper)

Student no. 10

Occupation: Student

Part-time coffee barista

Journalist

Club: N/A

Best Subject: Literature, History and P.E.

Dominant Hand: Ambidextrous

Favorite Color: Brown and Dark Yellow

Favorite Food: Dark Coffee, Blueberry Muffins and Fruit Tarts,

Least Favorite Food: Celery and Mushy Food

Likes: Quiet Places, Silent Reading, Novel Collection (In any genre), Writing, Coffee, Anime and Manga (Mostly),

Dislikes: People Interfering his Privacy, Noisy Places, Trouble and Chaos, Losing Sleep (Mostly), People messing with him (Mostly),

Hobbies: Silent reading, Manga collecting, Writing his lastest book, Star-gazing, Solving Hard Riddles, Napping,

Talents: High-Level Magic, Master of Manipulation, Strong Liar (Only when being messed with), Cunning Tactics, Fabrication, Physical Self-defense, Weaponry Self-defense, Non-stop Debates,

Nicknames: West (From her family and friends)

Westyn-senpai or Hashimoto-senpai (From the freshmen students)

Leader (From his four friends: Noelle, Harper, Souta, and Keisuke)

Other Nicknames:

'Mister Luke' (Journalist Identity, secretly hidden)

______________________________________

Appearance and Personality

Appearance: Westyn has a tall and muscular and normal make body build. He has should-length coffee brown hair and has mustard yellow eyes. Westyn is a silent and an odd boy, who doesn't seem to have any interest.

Personality: Born as an only child, Westyn is a quiet boy who doesn't talk much except for his parents and aunt. Though he seems to talk a lot with his family members equally.

His father and aunt runs a regular cafe shop across the city streets of Crystalsle, which the whole family including him as well runs the busy shop. Mostly it was teenagers often visit there as a afternoon or after highschool hang out than adults coming there.

Westyn is rather expressionless and doesn't so much emotions towards other people and is pretty blunt, needless to say he's rather an oddball but in a strange way or it just depends on the other POV. Though he seems to have good intentions in his mind but it's somewhat hard to tell how from him eventually.

But with his friends though, he can show some sly and cheeky remarks. But in somewhat of friendly manner which no one can see coming from him.

Aside from that, he's often seen alone in the campus and school gardens but his small group of friends often join him and his silent walks which he doesn't mind them tagging along.

As mentioned, he's an oddball. With a combination of strange and less mysterious. Since he's doesn't express much of his emotions, his face seems blank but very stern like. But it looks pretty menacing though...

Pretty odd for him, but he does hold sharp intelligence and is strong for any words coming from his mouth. I can see some facts that relate to anyone that could offend or insult them but he doesn't care though, that sounds pretty clever and harsh though. What he did was telling them what they are after all.

What an strange boy after scouted here, but he's more than what he is.

______________________________________

Trivia

-The name 'Westyn' means 'from the western town'. While his surname 'Hashimoto' means '(one who lives) near the bridge'; habitational name common throughout Japan. Some bearers are of samurai descent.

-He's based on Kiyotaka Ayanokōji (From Classroom of Elite) and L Lawliet (From Death Note) A mix for Westyn.

-It appears he's the leader of his four friends which it something he didn't agree to. But after his abilities were being shown, he somewhat accepted it but not literally.

-He has some trouble of expressing his emotions sightly according to Noelle.

-Westyn seems to have his respects and manners towards woman thanks to his aunt and mom, an honest statement from Harper.

-He and Souta were pen pals since elementary till now.

-At a young age in the past, he was almost assaulted by his mother's ex-husband who left her with his mistress, after his mom met his dad and got married, he was furious and attacked the boy violently. Has very large and wide scars on his back to show proof.

-His mother and father worries about him a lot after the incident, but mostly for his mother, but he tells her that he'll be fine. Showing that he doesn't want to worry his family.

-He's smart in chess, escape houses and 6 pics in one word games.

-He's one of the students who knows about the conflicts between EDHA and RSA back at this homeland. But unfortunately he's got the most info on it, so the ones who are involved with it are afraid of him eventually. His expression is another way of looking down on them.

-A master of manipulation, if being messed with. He knowns how to play fair nicely on anyone.

-He has a soft side for baby animals.

-Has slight interest on communicating with the half-myths, but it didn't happen thanks to the conflicts that was created. He didn't gave up about it though.

-A great tutor on group studies.

[alkcomics]

Been making an effort to listen to at least one new album every month for a while now. The first year anniversary of the pandemic hitting felt like as good a time as ever to take stock of what I’ve been digging and share it with y’all.

Seeing this all helps me really feel the passing of time, which has been difficult with the lockdown isolation and depression. Album names link to a choice song on Bandcamp (when I can) or YouTube (when I can’t) in case anyone else out there feeling like a sad zoo animal wants to spice up the cage for a few minutes.

Hope y’all dig. Cheers!

2019 New Music

September | Ahmed Fakroun | “Did you like the musical texture of the Land Down Under song but wished it were sad Libyan disco instead? Well have I got the album for you.” Seriously though, Njoom Al Leyel is probably the most gorgeous song in existence

November | Patience by Mannequin Pussy | All the feels of the Joan of Arc/Kinsella bros Philly emo scene; rad female vocalist and one of the last live shows I saw before the shutdown

December | Devil is Fine by Zeal & Ardor | High concept music project mixing American Black folk with black metal; totally delivers on the premise

2020 New Music

January | Jaago by Lifafa | Vernacular electronic music project of Suryakant Sawhney; chill vibes and gorgeous lyrics

February | On by Altın Gün | The 70s psychedelic revival in Turkish rock music right now is my jam, and I’d be wearing lines in the vinyl if I had a physical copy of this album (waiting til next Bandcamp day to order)

March | Grab that Gun by the Organ | This album fell neatly into my life from the first driving bass line. Dunno how I missed it when it came out. Equal thirds Screaming Females, Joy Division, and it’s own dang thing

April | Dust by I Love You But I’ve Chosen Darkness | The dark indie pop post rock of your dreams

May | Savage Times by Hanni El Khatib | Come for the punk bangers, stay for the disco tear-jerkers. Hanni El Khatib delivers again

June | Antiphon by Alpha Mist | My cousin rec’d Kamasi Washington and I realized I was woefully illiterate in modern jazz. Very chill jazz sophisticated through the lens of hip-hop; echoings of J Dilla

July | Windflower by Herb Ellis & Remo Palmier | Jazz guitar album from the late 70s I’d never heard; melodic and exuding the feelings of death and renewal that come with spring

August | Space Echo: The Mystery Behind the Cosmic Sound of Cabo Verde Finally Revealed! by Various (collected by Analog Africa) | So much good 70s electronica from Africa, and this is a fantastic compilation of different artists with a very insane backstory

September | Drowner’s Wives by Monte Luna | Old school garage heavy feeling; just some good dark psych metal

October | Conference of the Birds by OM | Not my favorite OM album but one I’d never gotten to hear before and perfectly emblematic of why I fucking love them. Search the reddit thread of stoned grad students pouring over the lyrics to add the cherry on top

November | The June Frost by Mournful Congregation | Textured metal outfit from Australia with the range of black metal but the tone of doom

December | Life Metal by Sun O))) | As someone put it recently, this album is the soundtrack to the big bang. Monoliths & Dimensions always overshadowed it before, but after really giving it the time of day I say why pit two kings against each other. I think actually they were talking about M&D with that quote. Y’all ever been sent that meme with Sunn O))) and a vacuum cleaner that’s all “where’s the difference?” Not to take the funny seriously, but the difference is my cats lose their g-damn minds when the vacuum is on but absolutely vibe when Sunn O))) blasts through the airwaves -- which, luckily for them, is much more often than when I vacuum

2021 New Music

January | Liberty Bell by DARKSIDE | Dark electrowave - not a genre of music I generally flock to but I could and have listened to this song on repeat for days

February | What’s Your Pleasure by Jessie Ware | 2021 is about trying to branch out more, and I also don’t usually gravitate toward pop... but you give me a new disco record titled from a Hellraiser quote and I’ll fucking stan

March | Veils of Winter by Blackwater Holylight | ‘Motorcycle’ starts out doom, then gets stoner psych, then goes full dark hippy butt rock guitar riff with dreamy vocal goodness. The rest of the album loses the butt rock but you bet your butts my neighbors are tired of hearing it

April | Celestial by ISIS | A standby of post-metal glory that I’d never really heard in its entirety til now. ‘C.F.T’ is my favorite, but as an avid Earth fan it’s the easy choice. Perfect soundtrack to the warming spring nights, which in the words of a dear friend, are ‘for acid and metal’

---

Ask box is always open if anyone’s got some good jams they want to share my way. Love y’all

[artificialqueens]

I Wanna Ruin Our "Friendship" (Taywhora) - Vena

"You know, ‘galpal’ things can be nerve-wracking when you’re a gay, nervous wreck." Or it could simply be that Tayce used that as a shitty excuse to kiss Aurora without making things awkward.

a/n. An excuse to write vanilla Taywhora smut lmao. That's about it!

-----------

“You know, ‘galpal’ things can be nerve-wracking when you’re a gay, nervous wreck,” Bimini calls out. Aurora, thus far, has been in a - slightly, mind you! - shocked state for quite a few seconds, her eyes wandering around like crazy as she tried to recall everything that had just happened. 

Typhoon Tayce, that’s what happened.

Before she got to Black Cherry, it was all going as it usually went: the three girls piled up at Bimini’s, insulted each other then hyped each other up, put on pretty clothes (“Except for Tia,” Aurora would say), and took one first shot to get the night started.

Aurora looked through Bimini’s wardrobe to see if she could find something nice enough to “borrow” then never give back, going past the huge faux fur jacket with the leopard print and the collection of lime green slash neon pink shirts with a cleavage cut that barely covered their nipples.

“A button-up shirt, Bims?”

“Do you love it? Bought it for like, two dollars at a thrift store.”

“I mean,” Aurora said, “it’s pretty, but I wouldn’t wear it.”

Bimini’s scandalous laugh echoed through the room. “Try it on, babes!”

“Absolute clownery. I would  never  wear a button-up shirt. Especially not when going to a club,” Aurora said and grabbed her phone to scroll through Instagram, all too oblivious to the fact Tia had just finished buttoning up her yellow pineapple print shirt. Not that Tia would mind her words; after all, every day was Insulting Tia’s Fashion Choices Day for Aurora. Usual teasing. And she was okay with it.

“Much rather squash yourself into a tube dress that barely reaches the bottom of your knickers, right, Rory?” Tia counter-attacks.  The Kofi Strikes Back.

Aurora rolled her eyes, laughing a bit. She grabbed the brush sitting by Bims’ nightstand and started combing the taller girl’s hair. “At least  someone in this group has the chance to end the night up being pounded right. Bimini’s turned into a nun after meeting that guy Joey, and you have always dressed like you're 50-something. Therefore, I’m the hottest hoe out of yous.”

“ ’That guy Joey’, huh?” Bimini’s head peaked out of the bathroom door. “When will you stop calling him that? It’s been, what, nine months?”

“Yeah, and where is Bims a nun now? Those shorts are really living up to the  short  part. It’s leather, for fuck’s sake…” Tia groaned as a sharp pain went through her, coming straight from her scalp. “Ouch, you hound! Also, not everybody wants to end the night up being pounded, you know?  Not shagging with a different stranger every week  is also fun, maybe you should try it out sometime.”

“Yeah, you hound, not everybody likes syphilis!” Bimini yells from the bathroom. They all laugh.

Aurora yells back, “surely that doesn’t include you!”, and Bimini mumbles a small “not a joke, just a fact”.

The blondie put the brush away and landed a tiny kiss in Tia’s hair. She got off the bed, smacked Aurora in the arse, slightly touched by all that affection. “You know, when we first met, I first thought you were merely a bitchy prat. But now I realize I was absolutely correct all along. Although, I still love you.”

“I love  being insulted for free!” the blondie blurted out. “Anyways. We should get going. It’s almost nine. Bims is taking the longest time to put on such little fabric on their tiny body and it’s pissing me off.”

“Oi!” Bimini yelled, still in the bathroom. “Can’t rush perfection!”

Tia stopped by the bathroom door and blew them a kiss. “Have fun staying home then, hound.” After that, they were quick to grab their respective belongings and order a cab.

London was not a quiet town, moreso on Friday nights. Everybody wanted to go out for drinks, chats, maybe even getting lucky, who knows? As a consequence, there were lots of clubs down that area, although, to the girls, none of them matched Black Cherry - their favorite.

Could be because Joey, the owner, had the hots for Bimini ever since they first met - they matched up quite well, ended up shagging then dating - so it was free drinks for the three of them. There was more to it, though: the atmosphere, the people, the location. Felt like magic whenever they stepped inside, letting the music consume them (not the usual upbeat pop they had around the other clubs, the songs were picked very carefully by Ellie, their quote-unquote, “DJ”).

Aurora would deny it always and forever, but there was a bigger reason for her to always try to look her best every Friday night. And it had a name, time, and a beautiful pair of hands: Tayce, who always arrived a bit past ten (after making her friends wait for a solid half-hour), who was the embodiment of a moon child, who was the life of the dance floor.

Tayce was ridiculous. That was the only proper word Aurora could think of to describe her. Ridiculously beautiful, ridiculously smart, ridiculously nice.

First of all, great fashion. Tayce stood out with that astounding b&w jacket dress and those thigh-high boots (Aurora loved thigh-high boots more than watching Project Runway whilst eating Percy Pigs, ad that means  something ). Not to mention her hair seemed as if it that been tailored by the most royal of silkworms. Black, straight (unlike her, as Aurora would soon find out), and downy. Tayce’s skin tone reminded her of milk chocolate or Nutella, or maybe she was just hungry. Her eyes were two beautiful almonds (she was  definitely  hungry) and her plump, glossy lips were so full. and. kissable. Um…

Pretty. Ridiculously pretty.

And social. Tayce chatted with anyone who approached her, even the drunken blokes far too hammered to realize she was way out of their league who tried to get some. Friendly, but not like she would just let anyone get a hold of her. Aurora searched for the word in the confines of her brain, though it was hard… Assertive? Chatty? Someone who seemed to belong to the world? The word was right there…

“Confident.”

“What?” Aurora asked.

“The word is confident, babes.” Bimini hugged her waist. “You keep saying those things aloud, she might notice it in a while! That is if she hasn’t already…”

Aurora rolled her eyes and left them to it. They always went to the club together but parted ways after a few moments: Aurora could be found nearly shagging with some girl on the dance floor, Bimini went upstairs to do who-knows-what with Joe and Tia just danced her brains out - she truly did not need anyone to make her night better, apart from Lady Gaga and Kylie Minogue. By midnight, the blondie was far too gone, could barely remember her own name, but boy was she having the time of her life.

Somehow, whilst dancing (trying to - she was not the best dancer ever, truth be told), she bumped into Ms. Tall, Dark & Handsome

“Oh, nightie, Tayes! You look stunning tonight, by the way.”

“Rory, hi.” Tayce gave her an awkward hug. “You sound absolutely plastered.”

“No that, just… my voice is horse- I mean, hoarse - tonight.” Aurora cackled at herself. Words really were not her favorite thing (the perks of being dyslexic), and those few too many shots only aggravated her situation. “What I’m trying to say is…”

Tayce nodded and giggled. God, even her goddamn  giggle  was beautiful. Aurora wanted to drown in her. “You’re  absolutely  plastered.”

“Not that!”

“You are,” Tayce laughed, which caused the other girl to laugh as well. She was so damn cute. “Wanna know a secret?” Aurora nodded. “I am too.”

They both exploded in laughs, finding everything so damn funny besides all the nonsense they were saying. Just like every other Friday night, Tayce and Aurora chit-chat for a while. They were not friends, more like known strangers, but being regulars of the same club for so long meant their faces, voices, and presence were not that foreign to one another. And, since drunken A’whora was oh-so-sociable, of course, they would talk sometime.

(Because sober Aurora was too much of a chicken to reach out to Tayce.  Imagine  actually talking to a girl that beautiful without some alcohol in one’s system… She was friendly, yeah, but also intimidating as hell. Maybe because she was insanely attractive. Or it could be her eyebrows. Why was she even thinking about that right now, when they were discussing clothes and college stuff? Where did that come from?)

Whatever.

At a given moment,  Where Have You Been Came  on the speakers. And the way Aurora’s eyes sparkled as she started hopping in her place, yelling out the lyrics, looking like the happiest bitch in the world made Tayce’s heart kind of… race?

She had felt that a few times for Aurora, but it is hard not to when she’s just that pretty. And Tayce liked pretty girls. A lot. A  whole  lot.

As the end of the song approached and Aurora calmed down from all the “that’s my song!” and “Rihanna, I love you!”, Tayce didn’t even notice her body acting up against her will (or was it?), leaning forwards and forwards and grabbing the blondie by the neck. “You just look so pretty right now. I love your smile.”

The tension could’ve been cut with a damn knife, given how they were staring at each other. Confused, but into it.  What the actual fuck , Aurora thought.  Maybe she’s just way too drunk. Maybe she’s about to pass out and-

Tayce kissed her. And kissed her, and kissed her, and touched her. It was hurried, filled with luxury, as though they needed each other’s lips to keep them alive. Full of a desperation neither knew existed. Aurora could have never seen it coming, for she saw the tall girl as an untouchable being - because of some stupid reason. Tayce could have never seen it coming, for she didn’t believe she would have the guts (even intoxicated Tayce!) to do it anyways.

Turns out she did. Who knew?

As they parted, Tayce noticed the surprise that still took over Aurora’s face. Fuck? So she did what she did best: create a distraction. With a bright smile, all teeth and gums, Tayce said “galpal things.”

And they both laughed it off, as Aurora walked away trying to process everything out, almost instantly sobered out from the shock.

“Tayce just kissed me. No like, The Tayce just kissed me.”

“We’ve seen it,” Bimini replied.

“No, but she  kissed  me!”

“We’ve seen it,” Tia replied.

“Then she said it was ‘galpal’ things, Bims, Tee, I’m…?”

Finally,  finally , we reach the start once again. Properly contextualized, this time. Bimini’s hand rested against her bare shoulder. “You know, ‘galpal’ things can be nerve-wracking when you’re a gay, nervous wreck.”

Tia shrugged. “The perks of being a lesbian. Y’all never know shite! She could take your bitch ass to Paris and ask you to marry her during  the most romantic  date in the world and you would still be all oh-she-wants-to-be-friends-that’s-all, no wonder she dismissed it as being galpal things.”

“So you think she meant it?”

“Babes. Please. She grabbed your titties. That’s not a girl-friends thing, it’s a  girlfriends  thing.”

Aurora blushed hard, her ears so red it could be seen even under the club’s dim purple lights. “Suddenly you’re not that fitting for the nickname A’whora. Who’s the nun now?” Bimini teased.

Aurora laughed, back to her normal, usual state. Not that shy, lost mess, totally not confused as to why Tayce (The Tayce!) would ever want anything to do with her. “How can I be a prude if Tayce was grabbing my tits about three minutes ago?”

“Can’t be arsed.”

“But,” Tia said, “you should go to her, yanno? She could be your special one for the night.”

Tia was (as usual) correct.

[...]

There was no way of explaining how on Earth they both got to Aurora's apartment in such a short time. Her excitement was showing, as well as her nervousness. She had not been this close to her like, ever (!). As soon as the front door was closed, Aurora threw the girl to the sofa and climbed on top of her, the tension stronger than ever before. And, as Tayce’s fingers sneaked under the hem of her dress, right at the middle of her thigh, Aurora could have sworn there was nothing, nothing else in the world she wanted more than having the girl’s lips on hers once more.

“Please…,” she managed to let out. “Can we kiss… again?”

Tayce smiled wide (which made Aurora’s guts do flips and jumps that would put Olympic champs to shame) before leaning in agonizingly slow and trapping Aurora on her once again. With her piercing gaze, soft lips, and firm hands that wandered around everywhere she could reach; Aurora was a goner for her.

"Take me to your room," Tayce asked.

There was truly no sight like it, having such an astoundingly pretty woman in her bedsheets. Aurora let her hand fall to Tayce’s thighs, pulling her closer and already tugging at the band of her underwear. Tayce’s lips twisted in a seductive smirk, the same smug look she carried with her all night. Aurora sometimes thought that was her resting face. Not that she was complaining, for it was so. damn. charming. “Thought you’d be the one receiving tonight…”

And, impulsive slag she was, couldn’t revise the words before they came to exist. “I’m ambidextrous.”  Oh no. She’s laughing. That wasn’t sexy. Did I just ruin the mood or…?

“Good to know. I’m right-handed most of the time, you know,” Tayce said, grabbing Aurora’s hand and placing her right one underneath. And, damn, Aurora tried hard not to follow her every movement, but Tayce’s hands were simply mesmerizing and she couldn’t help herself. Long fingers. Black nail polish, so perfect it seemed she either got it done that day or never did dishes in her lifetime. Soft skin.

Fuck.

(She knows it’s weird, okay. Being caught way too many times staring endlessly at people’s hands and dealing with the embarrassment that washed over her face once someone else noticed was more than enough reminder. But, like aforementioned: she couldn’t help herself.)

“You like them?” Tayce arched her brow, eyes pointing to her hands. The blondie gulped. She  really  was not subtle, was she? “Talk to me, princess.”

“I- I do. I love your hands.”

From there, Tayce’s hand made way to Aurora’s chin. Held her in place then guided her neck upwards till she was exposed enough for Tayce to abuse the area however she wanted. Started out with small pecks here and there, whilst her thumbs traced tiny circles in Aurora’s collarbone. The blondie was slowly melting under her kisses, although she stiffened up once Tayce’s tongue met her skin. The touch was warm, wet, and welcome. It made Aurora squirm, whine at a low volume. Her legs pressed together and kept moving to find a position that would at least help her a bit. Yes, she was extremely easy to rile up and the other girl could definitely tell that just from that brief moment. And Tayce enjoyed it. A lot.

Still licking and sucking her neck, Tayce tried her best to get rid of the tight black dress Aurora was wearing. She felt her zipper being slowly pulled down, the night breeze a lovely contrast to the warmth that emanated from Tayce’s body. And from between her thighs.

“Take this off for me, would ‘ya?” Tayce asked, already fumbling with the lock of the blondie’s bra. Aurora was more than happy to oblige if that meant Tayce would call her princess once again, and in no time she was wearing nothing but her underwear and the black stockings. Tayce grabbed her breast once again, making her shudder from the intensity of her touches. It felt different for she was almost naked, no more fabrics keeping them apart. Better. Tayce flicked one of her nipples with her fingers before lowering her mouth and sucking it hard enough to earn her the loudest moan yet.

“Please, Tayes… Um…”

“What, princess? Tell me.”

Aurora grabbed her face and planted a kiss in her mouth.“Bite me,” she ordered.

Tayce smiled. That girl truly was something else. Switching between shy and demanding, begging then ordering. Made Tayce want to get to know all her sides. She had always thought Aurora was a figure, with her huge blonde curls, short dresses, and her way of flirting with everything that moved - be it seducing random men in the bars for the free drinks or trying to get on with a girl. It was fun, really, observing her from far away and periodically making small talk. Her interest in Aurora started to be more because of how her eyes crinkled when she smiled, her laid-back attitude, and her presence rather than for her spectacular pair of legs.

Plus, there was no denying it. Aurora was  gorgeous.

Tayce obeyed her. Bit the tip of her nipple, at first lightly just to test Aurora out. By the way she was writhing and moaning underneath her, Tayce knew it was working. So she sucked it again, letting her tongue wander around the soft, fair skin, leaving red marks wherever she touched. Then went back to biting, closing her teeth around the hard bud a bit harsher than before, just to find Aurora really, really enjoyed it.

Aurora left a trail of sweet kisses on the girl’s hair, drunk not only on alcohol but also on her smell. Tayce was driving her insane, and they had not even been doing much. W ith one shift move, the blondie straddled Tayce’s body, trapping her between her legs. “Thought you liked being under?”

“You got it wrong, pretty baby.” Tayce’s breath hitched once Aurora grabbed her thighs, spreading them further apart. The blondie’s hand sneaked through her skirt, quickly finding her already damp underwear and playing with her clit through the thin lace. “I like… fuck, um,  being fucked , not necessarily… under. Fuck, Rory.”

She had never heard Tayce’s voice sound so small and desperate as when she was grinding against the back of her hand. Fuck, Tayce was  wet.  “Feels good, baby?” Aurora managed to ask.

“Hm, yes… Need… need more.”

Aurora pulled Tayce’s panties off, and it slid through her legs till they reached the floor. Tayce spread her legs out even more whilst holding her skirt up, wanting nothing,  nothing  more than Aurora to just fuck her as she wanted.

“You’re so fucking hot, Tayes… God, you’re wet.”

Tayce smiled smugly once again. “Like it? All for you- ah! Fuck.” She couldn’t keep her volume down once Aurora dropped to her knees and stuck her tongue out, licking right above her folds and fumbling her clit up and down. She smiled at the reactions Tayce was having, already having her hands entangled in Aurora’s curls, trying to guide her head. But oh, she would not let Tayce have her way so easily. Aurora sucked her thighs, her stomach. Lifted her leg and gave her a slap in the ass. Tayce had to hold her position with both hands, but the moans got louder the closer Aurora got to her center.

“Rory, be a darling and do what you gotta do!”

Aurora kissed her thigh once more. She was up for some teasing, definitely. “Weren’t you the one who made me ask for everything just now? Tell me what you want, Tayes.”

“Eat me out. Right now.” Aurora arched a brow. “… Please.”

“Good girl.” Tayce didn’t even have time to register the pet name properly before Aurora went down on her. Straight to her swollen, wanting clit. She kissed it, sucked the very tip before pulling it back and exposing her even more; that was when she started to rapidly flick her tongue against it.

“Fuck, Rory, just like that… Ah, fuck.”

Aurora’s middle finger pressed against Tayce’s entrance. The other hand helped keep her in place.

“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me…” Tayce was far too gone to care about her cool image. She just wanted Aurora inside her as soon as possible. And Aurora gave it to her, how could she deny such a thing? She forced two of her fingers against the girl’s entrance. She did not need much though, for Tayce was dripping wet Aurora thrust her fingers in and out, curving her knuckles frantically inside of Tayce to reach her spot. By the sounds she was making, absolutely wrecked and stupid, it was working damn well. “More. More, Rory, fuck…”

Aurora was rapturous having  that  woman moaning her name like crazy. She had fucked a lot of people during her lifetime, but this was something else. The haunting thought she was simply a one-night stand for Tayce made her frown, but her brain was so full of all-things-Tayce she simply dismissed it quickly. She was there, Tayce was there and making her feel like the only woman in the world. She wanted nothing but to please her girl.

My girl? She’s not my girl. Stop thinking!

“Rory, more, please, use your tongue again, ah- fuck… Yes, fuck, you’re so good...” Aurora hummed in satisfaction against her, which caused a bolt to run through Tayce’s body. “Oh, fuck. I’m … getting… close, princess…”

Princess. Aurora did not know a simple word could have such an effect on her. Her hands started working faster, fucking Tayce harder, harder, harder until she could not take it anymore. Tayce was squirming, shaking, her legs could not stay still. She had to let it out. She had to. Had to. “Fuck, I’m so close, fuck…” Aurora increased the speed of her tongue as well. Her clit was so damn sensitive it hurt. She needed release, so bad, so bad, so bad and...

“Fuck!” Tayce cried out as an orgasm washed over her body, pulling Aurora’s head even closer to her, rocking her hips back and forth against her fingers whilst Aurora pumped them in and out the fastest she could, helping the girl ride her high. “Ah, Rory, fuck… Fuck.” Tayce’s previously shaking body had lost all its tension. She felt like jello. A cute smile lit up her face. “Fuuuck. That was good.”

Aurora climbed back up to her bed. She seemed just as content. “Was it?”

Tayce rolled her eyes. “Yeah, ask as if you didn’t just watch me cum my brains out for you. Of course, it was good! Whoa.” Aurora’s right hand peeked inside her own damp panties. “Do you want some help over there, princess?”

“No, just stay there looking pretty. I’ll cum in no time, I swear to you.”

And Tayce did as told, losing herself in Aurora’s lips as the blondie rubbed herself with tiny circles, moaning against the kisses every now and then. She was so worked up from getting Tayce off, relishing in the memories of her whimpers and her taste and just… everything. It really took no time for Aurora to get closer and closer and closer and cum all over her own hands. Fucking hell, she was satisfied. Very satisfied.

“I like you.” Tayce intertwined her fingers around Aurora’s slick, wet hand before guiding it to her mouth and licking it clean. It was kinda hot, but her eyes were so wide and doe if seemed almost… innocent. As if they had not spent the past few minutes fucking like horny teens. It was cute somehow. “I know we barely converse, but you’re pretty, fun, and sexy as hell. And girl, talk about that tongue! So… if you’re interested in like, going on a date, I’m so down.”

Aurora chuckled. “Hah. Thought I’d be a one-night stand.”

“Same. You always have a different girl with you… But thought I should shoot my shot since we came all the way here. Literally, came…” they both smiled. “So… what do you say?”

“I’d absolutely love to go on a date with you, Tayes. ”  Anyone would. Can’t believe she chose me, amongst them all…

“Guess it’s a deal then, Rory. When are you free?”

“Pick me up tomorrow at eight.” Aurora thought better. “Or just stay here, we’ll see what we can do.”

“Perfect.”

They cuddled (“I knew you were a little spoon, Rory!”). Aurora couldn’t ignore her friends’ perfect timing, as her phone shone indicating a new message had been received in their group chat:

  Tee:

whora ru alive  🥺  or did she fuck u so hard u dead now?

  Bims:  

Hope you didn’t give her syphilis x

  Tee:

thatd be u and joey only,, the syphilis couple. my girl whora is TESTED x

  Bims:

Heard from Joey you got laid too, he saw you walking out the club with a piece!!

  Tee:

and awhora had the nerve tell me i wouldnt fuck anyone with my button up shirt huh

  Bims:

Y’all nasty  🥰 now excuse me I gotta go get pounded as well lmao goodnight babes x

  Tee:

no bims we cant go. theyre lesbians. what if they get married in the meantime and we dont even hear about it!

  Whora:

Goodnight hoes and nooo not yet! But she’s taking me out tomorrow yikes

  Tee:

aaand shes sleeping there

  Whora:

Yeah <3

Tee:

👀👀👀

  Bims:

Give them 3 months, Tia. x

  Whora:

Luv u hounds! nightie

Tee:

nightie !!

  Bims:

Nightie!

[uswnt-has-my-heart]

can we get some highlights from the book? Just like your favorite parts, stuff you weren’t expecting?

Spoilers for Megan’s book under the cut!

Alright, okay, so I’ll start with my favorite parts and then I’ll add some of my favorite quotes at the end!

1. I think first and foremost we gotta talk about Sue saying “All I ask is you let me know” in response to Megan offering to leave her fiancé for her. I’m sorry but the sheer power Sue holds😳😳

2. WAMBINOE 👁👄👁 that stunned me, apparently some of y’all already knew that but I was way out of the loop on that one

3. The Jill Tea™ Megan just shading Jill Ellis so hard was the best. I also appreciated how it was respectful but you still come out of it going: wtf was Jill on??? (Saying “if you’re nervous call your wife” is one of the fucking funniest things I’ve ever read with my own two eyes)

4. This is more of a comment,,,but Megan is so mentally stable??? Like I’m reading through this and I’m like,,,,is this what it’s like to not be mentally ill?? goddamn she’s so healthy

5. The way Megan writes about Sue with such love and adoration makes my heart absolutely melt. She’s just so soft and in love🥺🥺

Okay now on to some of my favorite quotes because goddamn Megan is a powerful writer:

- (this one is talking about the classic Megan pose during the France game) “I threw open my arms—shit-eating grin, chest out, heart wide-open, staring defiantly up at the crowd: Are you not entertained?! It was simultaneously a moment of pure performance and undiluted animal reflex. We are here; we are smiling; we are not going down.”

-“There’s a fallacy in America that acting for the common good means sacrificing the individual. Well, as a person of robust ego, I am here to tell you life doesn’t work like that. The interests of the individual aren’t at odds with the collective. You can win for the team and still celebrate your own performance.”

-“You can share, and help, and be part of your community, and you can also stand tall and enjoy your success. No caveat, no apology. Arms out wide, claim your space.”

-“Female athletes, in my experience, are paid for what we’ve already done, while men are paid for what they could do in the future.”

-“Sue doesn’t gush, or fuss, or make a big deal out of things, but the fact that she dived headfirst into this absolute dumpster fire of my life was an expressions of such love, and tenderness, and strength all in one, that for the first time in my life, I allowed myself truly to melt into someone.”

-“What I said to her that day is what I say to everyone who thinks it might be better not to be gay: You need to get over it.”

To the anon that sent me this: I am so fucking sorry it took me so long to answer!

If y’all want to hear more about the book, feel free to hit me up! I can really talk about it all day!

[lizabethstucker]

Book Journal Update

Remember how I said I wasn’t going to get a regular journal?�� Yeah, that didn’t last long.  I got my Pandemic money and decided a trip to Barnes & Noble was in order.  I was looking around, not so much to buy, but to look at what after Christmas sales they might have (few).  

I came across this beautiful journal from Ellie Claire.  While it is somewhat Christian focused, it is very subtle.   Just a few quotes on the bottom of some pages.  It is a dot journal, faint dots (my big issue with ARC’s dotted paper was how dark they were) and nicely thick paper.  The pen holder is on the spine, a new favorite location for me.

The cover is embossed.  I’ve added a couple of stickers (the books on the bottom, the tiny love ribbon above “Calendar”).  As you can see, it has an elastic closure.  Not seen is a blue ribbon page marker.

Inside the cover.

My phone didn’t feel like focusing, so I apologize for the blurriness.  A selection of stickers are helping pretty it up.  The quote is part of the journal.

The pages are numbered and there is an Index (4 pages) that I am not sharing here.  

Next is my self-made Book Shelf.  I’m so proud of how this came out.  The only things on here that are not drawn by my own hand is the Captain America shield and the sticker on the bottom right side. 

You can see just a smidge of the right hand page.  It is simply a listing of the books referenced on the Book Shelf.  I don’t even try to put the book titles on the shelved books.  Instead I numbered them, coloring them in based on what format the book is.

One of the things that Goodreads doesn’t do is breakdown the genres read during their yearly challenges, so this year I’m getting out in front of that.  Again, sorry for the blurriness, but I think it is clear enough to read.  If it isn’t and you’re curious, let me know.

Finally, the page that will kick off my year of reviews.  

The “Reviews of 2021!” is mine, accompanied by three stickers.  I’m still reading my first book of the year, so there isn’t anything to see yet, but I have a plan to stick a small cover printout next to some key information, as well as the number read:

1.  Title

2.  Author

3.  Date Published

4.  Format

5.  Date Started and Finished

6.  Genre

7.  Page Count (or time, if audio)

8.  How I Discovered This Book

9.  Stars to color for the rating

10.  Synopsis

11.  Review

For those wondering, the majority of the stickers are from The Happy Planner, category Bookish.  There are 680 pieces and a mixture of transparent and opaque.  Yes, I not only hit up BN, but stopped at Joann’s Fabrics on the way home.  I’m still hemming and hawing as to whether to go out this week to check Hobby Lobby’s collection.  Their religious fanaticism tends to put me off.

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask.  Or comment, if you prefer. 

[dilliebar]

Alrighty guys, I collected your questions and now I've got the answers for ya. Thank you all for submitting your asks, it was really sweet to hear from all of you! 💕

Without further ado, here's the Q&A!

Q1: Hi dilliebar!! 😊 I saw you and montys q + a collab on her blog and you guys are totally hilarious! Monty seems like a sweet heart to you and I look forward to seeing you guys post about each other! 💜 For your own q + a, how did you realize you liked monty, who asked who out, and how did it go? Give us the deets!! 😂 Love, a fan

A: Well it would take me a while to get into the full story, but like I said on monty's post, we really got to know each other really well during quarantine. I remember the first string of days where we talked to each other all day and up until we were too tired to text anymore. When I first realized I liked her was the first time she told me "goodnight" and "good morning", which sounds really cheesy but I remember it really vividly. After quite a long time of flirting with this clueless asshole, one day I just started venting to her about this "mystery girl" that I liked, and she told me to ask her out. So I did, right then and there, and sent monty an ask saying "I like you, idiot". As you can probably tell, she felt the same way 😌 Love you too, anon! 💕

Q2: Hi. For the Q/A, do you have any hobbies? Love your writing, by the way. Would love to know what else you get up to in your free time.

A: Well video games, obviously are a big one. I stayed up for like 30 hours straight just to finish tlou2. But other than that, my main thing would definitely have to be computer science, although I'm hoping to turn that into a little more than a hobby after I get my associates. Mostly I've been fucking around with Unity but sometimes I make programs in C++ just to do my homework for me cause I'm lazy. Also, one of my nerdiest (but funnest) hobbies is playing Dungeons and Dragons. I've been playing it since I was 12 or 13 and it's been one of my favorite things to do ever since; I always play at our local game shop on Sundays and Wedensdays 😌🎲

Q3/3.5 (since these kind of go hand-in-hand):

what inspires you to write?

and

hi totally not monty or anything but i wanted to contribute so :) what’s something that really inspires you to write? also ur cute :)

A: Honestly ever since I was really little I liked to get lost in my head and all that. Whenever I got into something, like tv shows or video games, I liked to think about possible scenarios or storylines they might be a part of. When my sister told me about fanfiction I was like "hey, I could do that!" and I did. For a while I only wrote TWD fanfiction (don't ask, I'll never tell you which ones), then I dropped out of writing fanfiction for a while, and once I hopped onto the TLOU2 hype train I needed an outlet for all of my predictions and thoughts on the characters, so I hopped back into writing again. I like to write what I'm feeling; angsty if I'm sad; fluffy if I'm feeling sappy; but overall I've always really connected with Ellie's character ever since I played tlou all those years ago, so she's always a joy to write no matter what mood the fic is. Also, you're cute too "anon" you fuckin nut.

Q4: How did you and monty meet, Dillie? :) Do you guys plan on meeting irl? Love you guys xx

A: Monty and I first met here on Tumblr. I read a lot of her writing and lowkey lurked on her blog for a while, and our first interaction was me reblogging a "dina's a power bottom" post with some stupid meme telling her she was wrong skdksjfkskd. I remember the first conversation was in the comments of a random post, I dont quite remember which, but it went a little something like:

"ur wrong"

"no ur wrong"

"no U-"

and thats how we became mutuals. then the pandemic hit and things ramped up from there, and so here we are. also, we are hopefully planning on meeting sometime in the winter, which would be absolutely amazing bc I miss her very much 💕

Q5: What’s your favorite OST from part 2?

A: oooooo, okay, so my favorite OST would definitely have to be "allowed to be happy". Even though its based off of an Abby/Owen quote, it always makes me think of Ellie/Dina and I usually have it in the background while I'm writing.

Q6: Your fic is amazing! 😊💕 You’re an insane writer Dillie. You and Monty blow me away with your writing. Which leads me to my Q&A Question: Does Monty ever help you write? Or do you help her? Do you guys plan on writing a fic together? (That would be so amazing!!!! 😱) Anyway, keep up the great work! Looking forward to more stuff from you! ☺️

A: thank you so much anon!! 💕🥺 We do help each other out a lot, whether it's coming up with ideas for a section or just figuring out how to make a transition. I will admit, when I wrote the "Use Me" fic I needed a lot of help from her because I'd never written a smut fic before. There's also a part in Monty's "In Her Backseat" fic where Ellie's group of friends are eating lunch together, and Dina brushes some pizza sauce off of Ellie's face; that was me 👀. Oh and we have talked about doing a fic together, but we're still trying to find the right one. Feel free to leave suggestions 💕😁

Q7: hi dilliebar :D what do you see yourself doing as a career in the future and where do you picture yourself living? thanks! ❤️

A: Like i said earlier, I'm really interested in computer science, and I've been learning a lot of C++ and about computer structures since quarantine. I'm actually in college rn and I'm taking my first CS class this upcoming semester so I'm really excited for that! I'd love to work in the game development industry (Naughty Dog is my dream), but when I was younger I really wanted to work at Google, so who knows? But definitely the computer science field. As for where I want to live, that's a hard one. I've always been a city girl so I'd have to say somewhere populated, although once I retire I'd like to either just chill out on a nice farm somewhere or move back to my small hometown 😌💕

And that’s about it for this Q&A! Again, thank you guys so much for all the questions, I really wasn’t expecting such an incredible response. It’s really nice to talk to you guys, even if it’s anonymously :)

[that-bi-bliophile]

So my friends and I have an ongoing collection of quotes that my crazy math teacher has said. We had our last math class today so I felt it would be a good time to share this. (I added some annotations so that it makes more sense to people who weren’t there)

                                                 Quotes by Mr. G

                                             -An Ongoing Project-

“Grizzly bear will never get reindeer, correct?”

“Health is good”

“I don’t know what planet you are from”

“Hey, build pyramids!”

“And Humperdink will be sitting at his lonely table” (I looked it up and there’s a song called Lonely Table by Engelbert Humperdinck)

“Power to the power, power to the people.”

“I like that you laugh, it means you are still alive”

“Don’t laugh because people around you are shaking.”

“Someone is laughing, it is not supposed to be like that.”

“You are so engaged, that makes you 19”

“I appreciate if barricades are taken off your desk onto the floor.”

“And fish becomes shark and eats copies.”

“Also, cover your tails”

During an earthquake drill: “Take these drills seriously” -Mr. Asdfghjkl’, “Also, take seriously mathematics” -Mr. G

“I thought it is a box”

“Lice, only in your brain”

“Welcome again to the same stream, but water is different.”

“No, there is no Mr. G.”

“Yes, Mr. G is here”

“Why are you sitting?”

“I am concerned about your grade, and your knowledge. Mainly your knowledge.”

“By the way, I like tables.”

“About geometry and your life.”

“I don’t know what you are digging”

“Kids; too many”

“Look China, look China, look China”

“What information shall we withdraw from China?”

“Give me two points India!” (These last three were from a thing we did graphing country populations by the way)

“Specifically in the mountains.”

“I am driving, Maxime, do you understand?”

“He is doing minimum, it is food for thoughts.”

“He is also a jumper, will you share what you see in the other world?”

“Mr. G often goes tangentially.”

“Ellie chose and very wisely!”

“Ladies and gentlemen, our train is approaching, silence, tunnel, please, or else explosion.”

“Goat leg”

“I will now burst with my anger.”

“Mr. G is standing on his head now.”

“Homework is a bridge.”

“Anita was a fox and Basilio lost his money: golden bars.”

“I feed you, you are a shark and sharks are biting everything.”

“Thank you for stretching, maybe you have the right.”

“Your teacher is Mr. G, I know him.”

“Don’t be scared, but some of you didn’t learn and you are going to suffer.”

“You are the first representative of a younger generation.”

“I am not poisoning you.”

“I am entertaining you. It is the afternoon.”

“Look at their information, it’s terrible!”

“Where comes two? Oh! From the ceiling!”

“I made a mistake, wait, did I?”

“They forbid me to go to school, they say they will arrest me.” (During quarantine)

“Stop with attention span, whatever happened, don’t pay attention.”

“Go, go, go, go, go, go!”

“Anastasiya, did you learn your fingernails very nicely?”

“We are all working, I don’t know what republic you are.”

“No big goose.”

“Now we have geese in the water, looking something.”

“It’s not a pack of wolves, okay?”

“It’s called an undisciplined guy.”

“It came because we were catching all big fish”

“Algebra: without algebra there is nothing in life.”

“You are like fish”

“Your brain will grow like a cabbage”

“O.M.G. Our mutual goal”

“Tongue rolling attitude”

“A gebra named al”

 “Knowledge shouldn’t be soft”

“Hands up, how many hands do you have?” Max says, “10.” (We have a theory that he’s an alien, he’s also said things like “blonde eyed, blue haired”)

“Only happy people watch a clock, because they want to extend their happiness.”

“Relax, feel in my classroom, at home.”

“Someone is running water.”

“In U.S. you have freedom and liberty” (Mr. G is talking about not finding the discriminant before solving.)

“Bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, where is my bacon.”

“Alexa, turn off, Alexa will you turn off your music?” (Caused several other people’s Alexa’s to turn on over Google Meets)

“Dying, just relax guys, I’m not dying.”

“Tilda likes her boys like she likes her numbers, positive.”

“What’s up is here.”

CMC: “A score of 14 and over should be commended.”

Mr. G: “A score of 14 and over shouldn’t be commended in this classroom.”

(He told math team he expected us to get at least 26)

“Relley, you are number 7”

“Two minutes! It is too much time!”

“Sixth graders are like rabbits. They are always twitching, and each time you turn around there are more of them.”

“Only Mr. G can put flesh and blood into these skeletons.”

“In Ukraine, they call it the big bear, but here, you call it the big diaper.” (He meant the big dipper)

“Boo, did you do your homework?!” (We have a great recording of this one. We did it for our Spooky Room™ in advisory because his granddaughter is in my advisory)

“Sing the song!” (Then he ‘sings’ the quadratic formula on like one note)

“The textbook is your bible.”

“Shake your heads!”

“‘Good Morning!’ said Bilbo, ‘What do you mean?’ he said. ‘Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good one?’”

“Alessandra, you need a life.” (This was really odd for him to say a student shouldn’t just spend all their time on mathematics, a different teacher ran out of the room to tell people @ohnoimfangirlingagain)

“Tilda, you are good, not great, but good.”

“You are the best of the best.”

“You now owe me a Ritz box.”

“Any questions” -Mr. G, “Nope” -Student, “Okay, also not good because there should be questions”-Mr. G

“Like a magic wand.”

“Is anyone falling apart, is anyone under the table?”

“I can see behind the sofa, is anyone in the orchard, picking fruit?”

“Sending them out of the boundaries of the United States, oops out of the equation.”

“You are great specialist at this one.”

“Not president of the united states, but candidate for the equation”

“You are very good citizen of BPC school.”

“Guys tell me, difficult? Difficult in training or easy in battle taking test.”

“Extraneous root is like outside fish that we throw back to the sea because it is not the fish.” (One of my favorites. I’m making it bold so that it’s more visible)

“Relax, go under sofa or whatever is best place for you.”

“ZPP, not Zina.”

“Off we start”

“Alexa, I am not asking you, switch off, Alexa, Alexa, thank you.”

“Tangent tangent tangent secant secant secant secant tangent”

“You need to respond, it is why police respond.”

“Its been one minute, I will count one minute from our time.”

“He is doing simultaneously Step 1 and Step 2! I love you!”

*leaning in and whispering into the computer, so just one student will hear* “Can you hear me? Psst can you hear me? Turn in your homework!”

“Gabby, open your face.”

“You have 9 minutes to relax.”

"Examples, they are clear? Good color?"

"Who is joining shout?"

“Everything: Mr. G is doing everything thoroughly, digging, digging, digging. Where is digging?”

“Coming to this minus, says, ‘Hello!’.”

“The secret is easy: you don't do any stupid things.”

“I will introduce the basic things, and skeleton.”

“Margaux, show me your face. I have forgot already in two months.”

“Drink coffee, oops, tea... talk to your dog... make your cat happy... keep energy up.”

"Just take in your bloodstream"

“Why are you running in orchard, picking wegetables.”

“In many countries. In Ukraine, we had Chernobyl and stay at home, in Africa, we had disease outbreak, no tvs. Now. I am good at distance learning.” (He’s from Ukraine and also taught in Africa)

“See they are asking you? Did you get four? If you didn’t get four, you have a problem?”

“I know, I know, but they are more mistakes here, they are playing tricks, they are wrong.”

“Grudge on you, very big grudge on you.”

“You see, I am covering.”

“Don’t jump to conclusion, good teams don’t jump to conclusion. Now jump to conclusion.”

Anastasiya “Play ocean sounds for one hour.” Mr. G “You have to go somewhere?”

Cole plays music, Mr. G says “Not funny.”

“Seventh grade are all five, five musketeers.”

“We are 15 already which means someone else is here”

“So far, I am boxing you.”

“Herrings are little fish that Russians love, not Ukranians.” 

“In Zambia there are potholes in the road. So I would fill them in with gravel. Now we are going to do that with your knowledge.”

“Cinderella had to get peas from sand. And she shook the blanket. Use BUCK.” (He often tells us to shake our heads)

“Please guys, open your faces.”

“You are like little red riding hood: lost.”

“To my surprise, it is time to start.”

“Now it is time to collect stones.”

“What will you do in Europe?”

“I don't like that it’s excluded, because 2 will feel excluded.”

“Infinite algebra 1”

“I am back to discuss with you our problems.”

“What is secret about? You are canceling.”

“It’s like I am merging to highway.”

“Welcome to Ukraine, my friends.”

“I have plans for you, but you will always change plans.”

“Wow, it’s attacking me from all sides! Zina in the kitchen...”

“It's like avalanche or cabbage growing, I hope paper cabbage is still growing full of your energy.”

“Be cute enough to see.”

“Give me volume! Volume, volume, volume, volume, volume!”

“I wasn’t running with you… you know, fast?”

“Three trees doesn’t make woods.” (But in Chinese two do, just saying)

“So far you are free.”

“Is there anyone falling apart, under the table, please come out. I see you.”

“What should I say now? That it is too much work, sorry.”

“The last is seesaw problem. I am joking, I don’t know if I will show you today seesaw.”

“And I will be watching you now.”

“Do you want to talk about life? We are talking about life.”

"Don't touch 7th graders, they are like a hive of bees, you never know, they will bite you."

“You are late for the date with Mr. G.”

“Someone wants to join, no.”

“Someone is just troubling us.”

“Someone is just breaking my computer.”

“There is no problem, it is my invention.” 

I will miss his class a lot.

[curewhimsy]

Perrsonality descriptions for my Squishmallow collection that I have so far.

(It’s not a lot of content yet though.)

———

Squishmallow bios

Danny lion- A lion who is very timid. However, he has moments of bravery that surprise everyone, even himself. Danny loves to eat meatloaf. He is very sentimental and is a bit of a crybaby, often writing poetry and is moved by works of beauty. Danny dreams of being on a rescue team who saves people from the dangers in Whimsica, however he feels he is too cowardly. But the one time he saved Acorn from a fire, everyone encouraged him. Birthday is March 28.

Simon red panda- Simon is a cheerful red panda who likes to play 4-footed soccer, a special kind of soccer animals play. He lives in a treehouse in Speckle town. Simon used to be very closed-off and lonely after his mother died. But through making friends and being part of the team, he regained a love of life. Simon treasures the simple things in life such as friendship, eating ice cream, having good dreams, and scoring a goal. He is also known for giving good advice to his friends. He can be clumsy but he doesn’t let it stop him. Birthday is April 22.

Song the panda- Song is a shy panda, but she loves to compose music. Song likes to eat plum dumplings and drink tea. Her favorite pastime is taking baths and singing in the tub. Song is shy, but the music she composes is mainly party music. She was once a DJ at a club for animals and was a hit. Birthday is May 3.

Chilly penguin- Chilly may be a penguin from the Antarctic, but their special ability is that they can breathe fire! Surprise! Their full name is actually Chilly Pepper. Sometimes Chilly feels like an outcast or a misfit for their power. They love cold weather, and their favorite food is sashimi, which is uncooked fish. But their power luckily comes in handy for defeating the abominable snow golems that spawn near their family’s home! Chilly is non-binary and uses they/them pronouns. Birthday is July 2.

Benny raccoon- Benny may live in a dumpster behind an Italian restaurant, but it’s the cleanest dumpster you will ever see. Everything is organized and sanitized. It’s so neat, that it can be described as classy! Benny is a connoisseur of delicacies and his favorite food is Parmesan cheese. Many people think he would be stuck-up, but Benny is actually goofy and friendly. He is a big eater and is often found snacking away on Parmesan mac and cheese while watching a soap opera or reading a mystery novel. Benny loves dramatic stories as well. Birthday is June 4.

Star pastel unicorn- Star lives in a city up in the clouds. She likes to eat colorful star-shaped breakfast cereal that is mostly marshmallows and gummies. She is friends with Moemi Kise.

Ringo magenta unicorn- Ringo lives in an enchanted forest with the tastiest apples in all of Whimsica. The apples come in all sorts of beautiful and rare colors. Ringo is friends with Haruko Asada.

Acorn squirrel- A somewhat grouchy squirrel who doesn’t like to be chipper like other squirrels. Acorn lives in a hole in a big shady oak tree in the Violet Ivy University Campus and goes to the library a lot. Their favorite kinds of books are science fiction space odysseys and cookbooks. They aren’t a student at the university, but can be found around the campus. Acorn likes to cook all sorts of forest recipes and often has a nice aroma coming from their home. Acorn isn’t very social, and is uncomfortable socializing with those they don’t know well. But they are interesting and knowledgeable once you get to know them. Acorn is non-binary and uses they/them pronouns. Birthday is February 5.

Delia fawn- Delia is a bit of a wild child, unlike the other gentle deer. She loves to explore and rough-play with animals a lot bigger than her. Delia is always getting into trouble, thinking of wild schemes and ideas, and then going through with them. Delia’s dream is to be a runner in the animal olympics. Birthday is February 24

Elmer dinosaur- Birthday is December 8

Sherry pink owl- Birthday is January 9

Rainy teal owl- Rainy is Cozy’s little sister. Birthday is April 5

Ferris pegasus- Ferris’ old home was in the stratosphere, but he moved down to the atmosphere because there weren’t a lot of friends in the stratosphere and he got lonely. He can eat clouds. Ferris is friends with Setsuna Usui. His birthday is January 30

Clyde dragon- Clyde is a cool guy who likes memes and video games. However, he is very shy. Loves pizza and Mountain Dew soda. Rumor has it that he is neon green because he drinks so much Mountain Dew. Clyde also loves gardening and has his own garden with many rare plants. Clyde lives in a small caldera, which is a crater left after a volcano eruption. There are a lot of green plants blooming in his home, and there is a pond in the center. Clyde is friends with Rie Kubota. Birthday is March 20

Kit cat- A cuddly and cozy cat. Kit loves to relax and is very friendly. She always has dreams about herself going on different wacky adventures. Since Kit is disabled and has mobility issues, being able to dream is important to her. Kit has a special power where if someone else is sleeping at the same time as her, she can appear inside of their dream, and share the dreams she has with all her friends. At night, Kit and her friends go on magical adventures inside of their dreams. Kit’s owner is Margot, and she is also friends with Rainy the owl. Her birthday is November 1

Boris koala- Boris is a deaf koala who uses sign language to communicate. He loves to paint pictures. His birthday is October 2

Slumber owl- A genius yet scatterbrained owl. Slumber may quote famous geniuses a lot, but sometimes at the wrong time. Slumber invents very elaborate knick-knacks, but most of them have an obscure reason to use that rarely occurs. His birthday is October 19.

Cozy owl- Slumber’s pal. A bit of a couch potato. However, he can play guitar. His birthday is September 27. 

Lullaby owl- Lullaby runs a daycare service. She sings soothing lullabies, but she is also a death metal singer as well. Birthday is November 6.

Sugarplum cat- Birthday December 22

Raine alpaca

Pancake shiba dog

Swirl strawberry

Lolly Pop cat

Shortcake cat

Donut teal dog

Topaz dinosaur

Soda Pop bunny- Soda Pop is a docile bunny, but they are able to roar!

Macaroni dog- Macaroni is a big yet playful dog who likes to eat cheese and have adventures. He has boundless curiosity and likes to explore new places such as forests and caves.

Periwinkle squid

Goo jellyfish

Gouda octopus

Comfy donkey- Birthday is August 9.

Art cat- Birthday is May 30.

Prism cat- Birthday is May 30.

Ice Pop bunny- Birthday is January 12

Jubilee bunny- Birthday November 19

Ellie elephant

Corn Dog pug

Nacho fox

Bailey lamb

Wanda butterfly

Mango flamingo- Birthday is September 1

Gumdrop cat

Doodle turtle

Peach flamingo

Smiley clownfish

Seamore dolphin

Finn shark

Ketchup octopus- Birthday is May 18

Mochi seal- A fashionable and outgoing seal

Lime turtle- Lime is a bit of a pest, but he means well.

Walnut walrus- A gentle and sensitive walrus

Flapjack dog- Birthday July 20

Crepe Suzette cheetah-

Estella fox-

[homenum-revelio-hq]

Welcome (again) to the Order of the Phoenix, Beth!

You have been accepted for the role of non-biography character ARTEM TREBLAY with the faceclaim of Kristen Stewart! We enjoyed how to incorporated the game-canon veela lore into your application, while also keeping Artem within their own person. We’re very interested in having a character on the dash that is a bit controversial in relationship to the Order, especially with the most recently mission failing. We’re looking forward to seeing Artem’s decisions regarding this and appreciated your attention to detail throughout your application.

Please take a look at the new member checklist and send in your account within 24 hours! Thank you for joining the fight against Voldemort!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME: Beth

AGE: 24

TIMEZONE: CST

ACTIVITY LEVEL: You can see my current activity with Sirius. I will dip slightly once the semester kicks back in, but I don’t think I will struggle.

ANYTHING ELSE: Nothing here.

CHARACTER DETAILS:

NAME: Artem Nikita Tremblay – When Artem was ready to rid themself of their family’s influence, they didn’t initially know where to begin on a new name that felt more like them. They threw themselves into researching Slavic names for a piece of family origin to replace the British feminine name they’d been saddled with. Artem felt fitting for a few reasons. It sounded nice, it means “unharmed” which they’d like to pretend they escaped as, and it was a dedication to Artemis. As a child, they’d often heard to be ladylike, and Artemis quickly because their favorite example of a badass lady who didn’t sit still and let things be done to her. She was active, a hunter, and uninterested in becoming a perfect wife. All of that seemed perfect to Artem. Nikita was another neutral name they found and liked for a middle name. When possible, they put “Artem Nikita” as their full name and drop their family name.

AGE: 27 (December 14, 1954)

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY:

Agender; Prefers both he/him and they/them and would accept other pronouns as long as the user avoids she/her; Sexually Fluid, but Artem is apprehensive to follow through with the attraction he feels. He has a complicated relationship with his body and isn’t in a hurry to bring someone else into the mix. He’s had some experiences with kissing and intimacy but never with heavy touching or clothing removal because he’s never trusted anyone enough to take further steps.

Gender is a complex notion for Artem tied up in his veela heritage. I’m going to quote Ky from a conversation we had about the character as someone “in whom you’ve worked together a disconnect with their assigned gender and with their veela heritage/aspects, when both that assigned gender and veela heritage/aspects are valued for qualities, physical, emotional, etc, that Artem doesn’t feel at home in.” Artem’s perception of being female is very tied to the traditionally feminine values of pureblood society, and while he has worked to disconnect them in adulthood, he is still working past the connection society places on that femininity and his veela heritage. Both are expected to be charming, graceful, beautiful, serene, and docile unless pushed to the point of breaking. Artem doesn’t want to be any of that, and in rejecting that narrow feminine mold, he also rejected being veela. The difference is that while Artem is not female and has since learned to see other aspects of womanhood in people who don’t fit his mother’s ideals, he cannot fully split himself from being veela because he is whether he likes it or not.

BLOOD STATUS: Half-Veela 

HOUSE ALUMNI: Gryffindor—Not so much the chivalry, but they’re bold and brash and won’t sit idly if there’s something they can do

CHARACTER BACKGROUND:

PERSONALITY:

Artem has spent a lot of time figuring out how to be comfortable in his own skin. Artem was sick of being underestimated by people who took one look at him and assumed he couldn’t hold his own. Artem was determined to change that. They started working out religiously, and once they had the opportunity, they began boxing in a muggle club and got good at it. If people commented on their perception of Artem as female, well, Artem hit those people harder to give them the embarrassment of being not only beaten but beaten soundly by someone they saw as a girl. The regulars didn’t care. The regulars saw Artem as a badass who didn’t like to lose, and they could respect that. He liked the way it felt to fight, to be in control of his own body and his situation. He liked being respected, and being able to defend himself the muggle or magical way has been a huge step forward for him.

He’s still not to 100% comfort, but he’s in a much better place than he used to be. Even when they were struggling most, though, Artem met life with strong determination and confidence. They’d like to believe they can talk their way out of any situation without using veela charm, and while they will get out of it without charm, they’re more likely to turn to a punch or a hex as a means of escape. Still, they have a strong sense of self-preservation and are pretty good about reading a room and getting out of a situation before it goes south. Unless they open their mouth.

When Artem has a good line, he’ll usually say it first and then have to deal with the consequences. Because of this, he’s had to work hard to develop to develop better control. Couple with his tendency to keep people at a distance to avoid rejection, he comes off as quite aloof at times. He doesn’t open up easily because even the people he trusts have hurt him so much. Even when he lets people close, it’s usually while he is serving some kind of role. For example, he has close work relationships with a few of the dancers, but that is while he plays protector, not while he strips the layers away. He has a hard time being vulnerable around people and is okay with that. People don’t need to see his vulnerability.

In a fit of anger at someone making veela comments in class seventh year, Artem marched back up to his dorm, borrowed a classmate’s razer and shaved his head. It was incredibly freeing, and they’ve kept it shaved ever since, one less signal to the world of their veela heritage. Their mother cried when she saw them at Christmas. Artem returned the small collection of decorative combs she’d slowly been passing over. While it further damaged their relationship with their mother, that moment and the resulting calm was proof to Artem that they maybe did want to be more masculine. If taking on a “male” haircut made them feel good, why couldn’t they do that in general? In those early days, Artem bought Polyjuice and used it to try out being different people to see how it felt. They only impersonated a woman once, and the lack of muscle definition that they’d work so hard to create made them end up shaking in a corner until it wore off. They’d been trying to figuring out what it would be like to be comfortable with their prettiness. Clearly that didn’t work because Artem got the woman’s body but not her confidence in it. They were still themself. They used the rest of the Polyjuice to try out being different cismen, but even those moments only reinforced to Artem that they didn’t want that for themself. They missed the comfort they had in their own skin, and the change in anatomy felt foreign and wrong. Clearly masculinity and the things associated with it are a cloak Artem likes to wear, but the male body is not.

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY:

The Tremblay family was once incredibly offended to be left out of the Sacred 28, but a recent halfblood in one branch of the family was enough to exclude them. They have since continued to married in some halfbloods when they haven’t been considered good enough for pureblood matches, but most family members would argue they should be considered pureblood. They have the money and the influence of a proper pureblood family but not quite the title.

Pearce and Alanna Tremblay both came from highly respected families. Alanna technically married down from her pureblood family because the Burke’s pureblood claim is still substantiated from that golden list the Tremblays didn’t make, but she didn’t consider it a step down. Pearce and Alanna were not a love match by any means, but their partnership has always been one of close fondness, and they quickly grew to love each other.

The couple had power and a lot of inherited money, but they initially had trouble conceiving and carrying a child to term. When Alanna finally gave birth to Douglas, they were elated and initially said they would be done having children, despite both wanting a large family. When she accidentally became pregnant five years later, Alanna refused to put her own health first, and she and Pearce began planning for the perfect little girl to add to their family.

Instead they got Ellwood. On one hand, it was more reassurance of their family line because they now had two male heirs to carry on the family line. On the other, they really wanted their perfect little girl. Pearce suggested perhaps they add to their family through more unconventional means that both wouldn’t be hard on Alanna’s body and would promise them their perfect little girl: they could adopt a halfveela. It was surprisingly simple to adopt internationally from Yugoslavia, and soon they had their beautiful child who Alanna proceeded to groom into all the refinement and expectations of a proper pureblood lady, never letting the child forget how much simpler it all was when blessed with veela gifts like grace, charm, and beauty that most pureblood girls would kill for.

That child wasn’t a girl, though, pureblood or otherwise. It took a long time for Artem to figure out exactly why they felt so uncomfortable with their mother’s expectations, and in some ways, they’re still parsing it out. All Artem knew for sure was that he felt the freest when allowed to run along behind his brothers. He and Ellie got into all kinds of trouble together, trouble than Douglas was quick to tattle about. Although it had taken a couple years for the Tremblay’s paperwork to clear and for all the proper money to be given where it needed to, Artem came to them as a toddler only a few months younger than Ellwood. When they eventually reached Hogwarts, the two were in the same year, although Ellwood went to Hufflepuff; neither of them followed Douglas’ lead into Slytherin.

It was to Ellie that Artem first admitted their confusion about not feeling like a girl but also not feeling like a boy. Ellie was also confused but mostly supportive, and he joined them in the library to find any scrap of information about people like Artem. He was with them as they tried out new names that felt more comfortable, and he stood by their side when in the summer after sixth year, they finally told Douglas. Douglas didn’t take it well and further alienated his sibling by immediately telling their parents and taking away Artem’s ability to do so. That led to shouting from all five family members and crying from everyone except Douglas. Artem had never seen their father cry before, and they pulled him into a tight hug as he bumbled through apologies for anything he’d ever done to hurt them. Alanna never apologized. Artem didn’t expect her to. Douglas never apologized either. Artem pretends not to care.

Contrary to their fears of family rejection, Artem was not thrown out by their family. Their mother hasn’t quite forgiven him for rejecting her teachings and gifted name, but even she is happy to have him stop by for dinner (although she frequently slips on both name and pronouns). The rest of his family still supports him, but Artem really doesn’t want anything to do with them, especially when he knows everyone except Ellie uses his deadname when he isn’t around to argue about it). He’s rejected his family over and over, only crawling back when he’s really scraped for money. The one person he sees somewhat regularly is Ellie, who still meets Artem for coffee once a week like clockwork. The only person he avoids unless absolutely necessarily is Douglas. Artem can’t bring himself to forgive his brother, and Ellie agrees that it’s justified.

OCCUPATION: Artem is a bouncer at Ganymede’s Gentleman’s Club. They got the job because the owners liked the idea of a veela being able to intervene in many situations to handle them discreetly. That said, Artem doesn’t use their charm ever if they can help it. Most of the time at work, they wouldn’t want to anyway. Why charm someone who cheated at cards into leaving when Artem can drag them out by their collar instead? And on the same token, Artem isn’t going to do anything to make more pleasant the throwing out of someone who tried to take advantage of a dancer. That person is going to wake up outside by the street with a splitting headache and a new black eye.

ROLE WITHIN THE ORDER/THOUGHTS ABOUT THE ORDER:

Artem had heard whisper of the Order for years, of course, and while Connor thought he was sneaky, using the rooms a sort of halfway house was bound to attract a little attention. Even before they’d really known why, they’d helped cover for his guests. As of a few months ago, Artem began hearing whispers of the Order helping relocate werewolves trying to avoid You-Know-Who. That was the final step for them as Artem decided they couldn’t stand by any longer.

Artem doesn’t necessarily like or even trust the Order, but if they win, the most likely outcome is that nothing changes in the abysmal way halfbreeds are treated. If the Death Eaters win, though, Artem knows the likelihood of being treated like absolute dirt or even chased out of England is high. It was a calculated risk of standing by and waiting for things to get worse or at least trying to keep things steady. They have no illusions about any of these human wix caring about them, as is proven by comments lumping in all halfbreeds with werewolves. Artem doesn’t necessarily have problems with werewolves (although he hates that they are able to pretend most of the time to be normal and to have people not immediately point to their hair or grace or beauty as othering things), but he will not pretend that their needs are the same as his. They aren’t even close.

The botched mission at the Nott Estate confirmed some of Artem’s worst fears: that the Order doesn’t really know what they’re doing and that they’re losing badly. He’s stuck here for now, but he’s already looking for an escape route. He wants to help, but not at his own expense. He’s not sticking his neck out to protect humans who don’t care about him.

SURVIVAL:

Complicated as things are, Artem loved his family, even Douglas. That said, he’s always put himself first since before he graduated from Hogwarts. For those first few years, Artem disappeared into the muggle world and barely checked in with Ellie, much less anyone else. When he realized he missed magic too much to stay away, Artem came crawling back with a little resentment that he ended up back at home for a few months while he figured out a new apartment and wizarding job. His mother was appalled when he started working at Ganymede’s. That only made it better.

Artem isn’t the best with money, but they can be mostly self-sufficient. They’re blessed that even when their family doesn’t approve of Artem’s choices, Artem can still stop by when things get tight and he’s looking for a new place. Currently he lives in an apartment above a shop in Diagon Alley, but it’s a place he doesn’t really spend a ton of time. They don’t really bring people over much, partially because Artem doesn’t like people to feel that familiar with them if they can help it, but it isn’t a complete disaster.

Should things go south with the Order, Artem does believe they could probably disappear again into the muggle world. It wouldn’t be the first time they’ve vanished.

RELATIONSHIPS:

AINSLEY ABBOTT: Artem never quite knew how to classify Ainsley, and he appreciated her greatly for it. They’d met for the first time in the Hogwarts Library because she was in the middle of some grand theory that her audience clearly didn’t care about. Artem listened carefully from over by the stacks, and at the end of her theory, went, “But what about…” and completely undermined her idea. She loved it, and the two soon developed of habit of spiraling back and forth. Artem couldn’t begin to keep up on the theories, but he loved to argue and could logic his way through most. Ainsley is one of the few people he lets win.

CONFIDENCE BROWN. Artem figured he would gain some friends through work, but he never expected to get along so well with someone that they’d call him their work spouse. But that’s the case with Connor. Connor is also one of the few people that Artem will fully loosen up around. Connor’s habit of flirting with everyone means that he’s a harmless person to banter with, and Artem is able to keep some of those conversation skills alive through empty flirting with Connor. Plus, Connor’s flair for dramatics means that he keeps people happy. He’s the kind of person Artem likes to be around.

CARADOC DEARBORN. Artem had always been used to trailing after Ellwood, and while they had their own friends at Hogwarts, it was hard to adjust to giving him up to people like Caradoc. Through Ellie, Caradoc and Artem did spend some time together, but they were never really friends. Ellie had asked Artem after they’d settled on “not-girl” pronouns if he could share that information with Caradoc, and while it had made Artem apprehensive, they had agreed. It’s with a certain fondness now that they recall Caradoc never messing up once he knew.

JAMES POTTER and LUCINDA TALKALOT. Artem only barely remembered James or Lucinda at all before joining the Order. They’d been kids together technically, forced to go to the same boring social events by their parents, but Artem had a few years on both that made it hard to relate. They did end up stuck together sometimes by simple nature of being somewhat close in age, although Artem was happy to let Ellwood have James. Ellie was good at accepting tagalongs, even if it did hurt when the mood became boys only. Sometimes they resented the mothers pushing Artem and Lucinda together, but at least Luci wasn’t the simpering little thing she could have been. As an adult, Artem doesn’t know how to feel about James being one of the decisionmakers for the Order when she still remembers him as a little kid with big eyes and unruly hair. His hair is still unruly. Her feelings about Lucinda aren’t quite as strong, but in many ways, it’s like starting over.

ARCHIBALD MACMILLAN. Artem has never liked Archie, and it’s not his fault. As a child, Artem was constantly reminded of their future duties as a perfect pureblood wife, and because they were the same age and would attend Hogwarts together, Archie was a common target for their mother’s musing. He was pureblood and seemed like the kind of person Artem could easily persuade. When the two were thrown together, it was always awkward and stiff, and it came to a great relief to Artem when his attention fixed on Isla. He may have called her a best friend, but Artem saw the writing on the wall long before their engagement was public. If they still resent him a little, well, it’s because Artem still has to hear from their mother how they squandered that opportunity.

OOC EXPLORATION:

SHIPS/ANTI-SHIPS: Artem/Chemistry for sure. I will reiterate that sex is a complicated thing for Artem, and he is likely to avoid any kind of physicality unless he trusts someone completely.

WHAT PRIVILEGES AND BIASES DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE?

Artem’s spent the last ten-ish years in the process of trying to untwine their hatred for the being halfveela from the very specific lens of what it means to be female that was shoved down their throat as a child. They will never truly be able to separate them completely, although Artem is at a place where they can acknowledge that female means a lot of things beyond that narrow definition. The halfveela traits are harder to get around because if being female means more than being the perfect pureblood lady, being halfveela seems to immediately point back to that. Veela beauty, charm, grace, elegance… These are all things Artem has worked and worked on to try and overcome. He has these things naturally and doesn’t want them because they point back to that person he has never been.

Other people seem to have a harder time overlooking those Veela traits, though, and Artem has had to put up with a lot of it. He’s watched as halfveela are held up as a positive example but only seen them being pushed down in practice. The worst days at Ganymede’s are when he steps in to escort out some drunk asshole who assumes the pretty veela boy is available. The first time it happened, Artem beat the man bloody and almost got hired. His boss chewed him out to no end, and when Artem explained what had happened to defend himself, he was told that was to be expected for someone like him.

Unsurprisingly Artem doesn’t trust fully human wix in the slightest. Humans always put themselves first, and Artem isn’t about to do differently. They won’t go out of their way to avoid people, but they definitely try not to put themself in potentially harmful situations that they can’t fight their way out of. They’ve heard more than empty promises about making life better for halfbreeds, and it often isn’t anything actually helpful to them personally. In some ways, Artem is sympathetic to muggleborns, but he doesn’t overly care about their situation. Obviously he grew up in a household where pureblood and high halfblood wix were held up as the shining standard, but he didn’t hear a lot of direct hate. He’s ambivalent in a world that says it’s impossible not to have an opinion, but Artem has bigger battles.

Artem wouldn’t consider themself prejudice against werewolves, but they’ve got some resentment. On one hand, Artem isn’t usually called a monster. Veela are vilified sometimes, but it’s not the excessive demonizing rhetoric that werewolves have. They know most werewolves probably consider halfveela lucky. But werewolves only change one night a month. The rest of the time they can hide. Artem has never wanted anything so desperately as the ability to just stop being halfveela, to no longer have people stare at them on the streets. Artem can’t hide being halfveela, and werewolves can hide their affliction just fine most of the time. They may all be considered halfbreeds, but their needs are not the same.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? I have a lot of passionate for this character and can’t wait to see how their personality meshes on the dash, especially when they have a lot of potential to clash and kind of sort of want some closer people in their life.

PLOT DROP IDEAS: I would love to see some kind of anti-veela or anti-halfbreed sentiment stirring up trouble.

ANYTHING ELSE?

Headcanon: Artem’s current wand is their second. When Artem and their mother went shopping for school supplies that first time, their mother insisted that Artem only be given wands with veela hair cores. None were particularly strong, and the wandmaker tried to talk her out of it. She refused, and Artem ended up with a temperamental wand that they never quite understood. That following summer, Artem snapped the wand out of anger during an argument over their grades, declaring that if their mother had let a wand actually choose Artem, they would be able to control their magic just fine. After spending the summer unable to so much as go outside with Ellie, Artem was allowed to go wand shopping with no restrictions. The wand they ended up with was a short unyielding fir wand with a dragon heartstring core. It has never given them the problems that the veela wand did. Just one more reasons Artem is sure being a veela was never mend to be part of who they are.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/01iTQnHaK284S0AUpvlF6d?si=gEbeARfpSjqjlj6JWgJnOA

https://www.pinterest.com/myrpboards/artem-nikita/

EXTRA FOR NON-BIO CHARACTERS:

PAST: After giving birth to two perfectly good heirs but not quite being healthy enough to risk another pregnancy, the halfblood but highly regarded Tremblay family adopted a halfveela as a way to promise themselves a perfect daughter to raise to pureblood standards. Clearly some promises are meant to be broken because they got Artem, who grew up knowing that the expectations thrust on them were not what they wanted but not initially realizing why. Once at Hogwarts, Artem realized fully that they didn’t want to be a girl but that being a boy felt wrong too. Their brother Ellwood was always supportive of them, and even the rest of their traditional wannabe pureblood family reacted better than Artem would have expected. That didn’t stop them from disappearing after graduation. Artem plunged into the muggle world for a few years, and while it was an extreme culture shock, they ended up in the growing gay community of Muggle London. It was a good place to be with people who helped Artem feel like they didn’t belong in their own skin. That’s also where they picked up boxing, something that changed Artem’s life. They felt positively about their magic, but the physical ability to take action and feel capable no matter the situation or if they had a wand felt more freeing than anything. Technically Artem could have used their Veela charm in those situations, but Artem never used it if they could help it. They felt strong, physically and more mentally than they had in years, but it was time to acknowledge that they couldn’t stay away from the magical community where they had their roots. They missed too much.

PRESENT: Now that they are back in the magical world, Artem deals more directly with that Veela heritage they’ve always tried to ignore. Muggles usually couldn’t put into words those halfveela traits, if they noticed them at all. Wix aren’t like that, and as far as Artem in concerned, most are far too bold it pointing them out. Artem doesn’t really believe the magical community can do better, but they definitely believe it can do worse. They joined the Order not because they believed in it, but because they were more concerned by the idea that Voldemort might win. What they’ve seen thus far from the Order hasn’t instilled much confidence in Artem that he won’t win anyway. Artem is starting from the bottom as a newcomer, and they’re not sure how much people trust them. That said, they don’t necessarily want to rise. They want to show up, do what must be done, and get out of there. Occasionally based on things that are said, though, Artem can’t help wanting to interject and have more of a voice. They may not be the most dedicated Order member, but if they’re here, Artem is going to try and do things right.

FC CHOICES: In order of preference: Kristen Stewart, Brie Larson, Jamie Clayton, Asia Kate Dillon

I know Brie Larson and Kristen Stewart are both cisgender, but they are blonde (I’d be using Kristen’s more recent looks of the blonde pixie cut and shaved head), have an athletic look, and the right vibe that I’m going for. Brie has the toughness and easy confidence. Kristen has the general energy level and the perfect haircut.  Asia Kate Dillon is nonbinary, and Jamie Clayton is a transgender woman. Between those two, I like Jamie’s energy a little bit better.

The trickiness with fcs is that Artem’s veela genetics means there is always going to be a certain level of what people associate as feminine beauty to them, no matter what they do. So they’re strong, have no hair, and generally dress in masculine clothing, but it does still happen that they are misgendered. The fc balance for that is something I’m toying with as to how to keep feminine features in a way that feels like his has the edges and physical strength needed. Brie seems to epitomize this the most, although Kristen’s hair is why I edged her slightly above in my preferences.

[bitchesofostwick]

favorite passage

rules: go to your current WIP and find your favorite passage! show yourself some love! thanks for tagging me @a-shakespearean-in-paris :) i’ll tag @fourletterepithet​ @daydreamingdragonage​ @veridium-bye​ @gingerbreton​ @dirthara-mama​ @cullenvhenan​ @star--nymph​ aaaand anyone else who would like to! i feel like i always tag the same people but i’m awful at remembering friends who like to be tagged in things.

When Ellinor is fourteen years old, her ninth attempt at passing unnoticed into the walls of the Ostwick Circle proves successful and the dozens of letters she’s written Avery over the past month prove worthwhile after all and she’s going to rescue him and they’re going to leave Ostwick, leave the Free Marches, run to Ferelden or Orlais or Nevarra or somewhere nobody knows them.

Somewhere they can be free.

And after she stalks through the shadowy corridors, weaves in and around the templars patrolling the hall, arrives at last in the apprentices’ tower, only one Trevelyan awaits her.

Bryony, she breathes, and time has closed any wounds she’d inflicted on her two years before when she’d last seen her and any differences she might have forged against their near-mirrored features have disappeared with the years but today she bears a Knight-Captain’s insignia embroidered into her templar-red sash and Ellinor knows there is no look she could have given her that would be uglier than the one she wears now.

Her heart pounds and her knuckles turn white but her attempt to unsheath her dagger—Avery’s dagger—is no match for the greatsword Bryony swings from over her shoulder or for the four templars behind her. She draws fast but they draw faster and she cannot win a match of blades but still she demands where is he? and Bryony only smiles, gone, she says, transferred, and Ellinor feels her heart drop to her stomach and for a moment—a long moment—she’s unable to breathe and still Bryony stands before her, no emotion betraying her face but the stony smile she still wears.

Where is he? she repeats slowly, shaking, hurt and panic and heartbreak uncontrolled and unrelenting within her, threatening at every word she speaks, and how can you smile? she asks, tears pooling in her eyes and he’s my—he’s our brother and he’s your brother too, he deserves to be home, to be fr—but Bryony interrupts her; home? she asks, laughing, laughing before she continues, did you not have an elaborate plan to run away from here? she asks her, to take him from the Circle? and she smiles and she grins, oh, Ellie, and her voice drips with boredom and deference and she shakes her head, that would make him an apostate, Ellie, an outlaw, Ellie, and the grin on her face vanishes just as soon as it’s appeared and when she speaks again she wears a face of stone and her eyes are ice and her voice is venomous.

Don’t you know that magic exists to serve man, Ellie, and never to rule over him?

***

okay okay i know Endings was a big fan favorite chapter but let’s just go back to Transfigurations for a sec. i looooove this passage. first of all, the way i write ellinor’s flashbacks (there’s another one in chapter six) is intentionally very lengthy and very fast, and i purposely use a lot of run-on sentences. the places i do make use of em dashes or commas are to really emphasize a specific word or phrase; otherwise, i want it to read as though you’re running through ellinor’s memories with her. this is the same reason that i italicize flashback dialogue instead of quoting it.

the OTHER main reason i love this so much is because prior to this chapter, what we know of bryony is only from passing comments. of ellinor’s sisters, the only one we’ve met at this point is lyssa—and with lyssa, we always have this underlying notion that she might not be the vile and heartless person ellinor wants us to believe she is. although we can infer, before this, that bryony is probably the bad person ellinor has described in her exchange with lyssa, we don’t really know the specifics until now, and it’s in this chapter that we can finally see bryony firsthand and collectively think “oh yeah okay fuck her, she really is awful.”

it helps if you read her dialogue in an azula voice, which is what i do when i write her.

[ddlg-matchmaking]

Little looking for anyone ❤️

Name: Zee Age: 18 Location: Florida 🌴 Little age range: 2-5👧 Role: Little Preferred little titles: anything special that you would think up for me 😊 About Yourself: I'm a shy little but I’ve been trying to grow outside of my comfort zone. Big life: I’m currently attending an online college for baking and pastry while going to work 5 days a week. I still live with my mom but am hoping to move out soon and open my own restaurant as well Little life: I’m really clingy and needy but am also to shy to ask for what I want sometimes. I love being told when to do and when my daddy/mommy is strict when I’m being bratty. I love when someone helps me with the smallest things even if I don’t realize I need the help. I love being held and cuddled especially when my anxiety acts up. Big interests: baking, watching supernatural or any horror movies that are funny , going to the park, cleaning, etc Little interests: I love Disney anything related to Disney is my favorite thing ever. Lilo and stitch is my favorite. I have the quote tattooed on my arms. I love coloring, dancing, singing, cuddling for sure , anything with daddy/mommy. Favorite big item? My cat lol. He’s a jerk but I love him so much Favorite little item? Probably my stuffies, my paci, or my cat Big activities? Honestly sex but I also enjoy going for car rides, walking on the beach or even cuddling while someone plays video games. Little activities? Cuddles and coloring and playing outside or sleeping Stuffies? I have so many, the whole lilo and stitch collection, the finding dory collection, Baymax, Olaf , walle and eve. And sooooo many more. But Ellie the elephant is my favorite 🙈🐘Preferred partner age: 18-25 Preferred partner type: Any Preferred partner role: Caretaker/Daddy/Mommy What are you looking for in a partner? I'm looking for an affectionate person who I can talk to about my day. Someone who is patient and puts up with my bratty moods as well as my anxiety when I’m doubting myself. I want someone or the more strict side rather than easy going. I want someone who will be willing to help me explore sexually as well once our relationship progresses I like when my daddy does.... Listens to me, praises and encourages me, checks in me, puts me into little space when I’m not already there, rewards me and punishes me. Things I dislike: , disappearing from conversations without warning, dishonesty, lying, cheating and forcing sexual activities when I clearly do not want them Deal breakers: Being patronizing/rude, being ignored, lack of communication Relationship type: I would like a sexual relationship but non sexual at first until we talk it out. I am a sadistic but I’ve never got to experience what I truly like and do not like. I am open for poly but prefer mono Best way to contact me: kik (hey_im_special) A few more things : I’ve only been in one real relationship so I’m quite slow and shy when it come to certain thing but I am more than willing to try out new things sexually and non sexually. I would love an irl relationship but ldr is fine as well if we click right. I want someone who will help me overcome things and help me reach my goals. I would love to move out of Florida. I love sushi and I have 5 tattoos. I’m a pretty chill person and don’t get mad easily.

[britneyshakespeare]

1, 2, 4, 15, and 16 for the 'identity asks'.

Thanks Helena! Hope you’re having a wonderful expedition

1. if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

i’ve actually been thinking of a similar concept in my mind a lot lately, for whatever reason. pieces of art/media that i admire a lot, and am always thinking about at least subconsciously

lady windermere’s fan and the ballad of reading gaol by oscar wilde

sense and sensibility by jane austen

a midsummer night’s dream by william shakespeare (and also probably the tempest if we’re being fair)

buffy the vampire slayer (1997-2003) and its spin-off angel (1999-2004)

the spider-man trilogy by sam raimi (2002-2007)

any poem collected in w. b. yeats’ 1921 volume michael robartes and the dancer

the white album by the beatles (and also probably revolver)

absolutely anything ever written by emily dickinson

rebel without a cause dir. nicholas ray

anything ever recorded by marianne faithfull

brian jones. just his life itself was art.

a fever you can’t sweat out and pretty. odd. by panic! at the disco

i probably should’ve stopped before i got to #13 but i could go on. a bunch of various albums and books and plays and movies that have had an impact on me. things i could passionately go off about at any moment.

2. have you ever found a writer who thinks just like you? if so, who?

i think the reason i consider shakespeare, dickinson, and wilde as my favorite writers (in english at least) is because there’s sort of an affinity i’ve had for each of them at one point or another. shakespeare’s very layered and archaic, metaphoric writing style always resonated with me. when i read shakespeare i think “this is what i’d like to write if i could live up to my full potential as a writer.” with dickinson, i have too much in common, biographically, not to relate to her. and i love her simplicity and use of metaphor so much. she really was a wonderful amateur, in such an inspiring way. her plain, uncut, unedited poems are just “primitive” as some critics have noted, in such a pure, uncut poetical energy sort of sense. and with wilde, what can i say there? probably the first “serious” writer i can say i discovered on my own (technically i discovered dickinson by myself in fifth grade through the book feathers by jacqueline woodson, and the poem stuck with me, but i just didn’t connect to her so much at that age) when i was a sophomore in high school. and i just felt so much oneness with the contradictory, constantly ironic and paradoxical wit of his. i don’t really know what i could say i have in common with oscar wilde, personally, but whenever i read his works they just feel instantly relatable. 

4. do you like your name?  is there another name you think would fit you better?

i do, i do like my name. although i don’t necessarily know if i’d say it “fits” me. what name fits anyone, really?

“diana” always felt so pretty and elegant to me, which i am very much not. my dad wanted to name me jacqueline and call me jackie but my mom thought that sounded “hideous! and matt, we’re not the kennedys!”

i like my last name, though. short and sweet, semi-common but not, like, smith common, and close to the beginning of the alphabet. before i knew i was aroace, i always thought if i got married, i’d keep my last name (and this goes back to when i was like, 10, so, way before i had any comprehension of any feminist reason to do so). and if i ever had kids, they’d all get my name.

15. five most influential books over your lifetime?

hmmm. i already named some with #1 but i’ll try and be a little different because this is a slightly different question.

feathers by jacqueline woodson, even though i haven’t read it since middle school at latest. and maybe also yankee girl by mary ann rodman. for some reason when i was in late elementary school i had this phase where i’d read all these historical fiction books about civil rights and racism. i don’t really know why! i was a little white girl in a 97% white suburban town of only a couple thousand people. with yankee girl it was because my friend read it, it was set in the 60s, and they made a bunch of references to the beatles which made me all excited. and then i just happened upon feathers the next year. but i think a first-person perspective through books, gave me a sort of understanding of american history as it affects people who are not me. that was good for me to read at that age. i went off too much about that.

the picture of dorian gray, probably. what can i say about wilde that i haven’t already said? hmm… i don’t know, but it’s a great novel.

spider-man comics in general, but especially the more human-centric storylines, behind the mask and all that. if i were to put one specific book it’d probably be death of the stacys with an honorable mention for the early 2000s miniseries spider-man: blue. but blue can’t really be read without the understanding of the death of the stacys. and also that was the first graphic novel i ever bought (well, it was a birthday present actually). but yes. the tragedy of gwen stacy especially is still a touchy subject for me.

american psycho by bret easton ellis. if for nothing else than i quote it (the novel and the superb movie adaptation directed by mary herron) with my sister constantly. but it really is top-notch 80s satire. if you haven’t read it, helena, i so recommend it. in many ways it’s a century-later update of the picture of dorian gray, but without the portrait and instead with constant psychological tumult. it’s gripping as hell.

hmmmm. this is hard. i probably answered too many for #1. i guess i’ll say the complete poems of w. b. yeats edited by richard finneran. it was one of the first volumes of poetry i ever bought for myself, i used to just read online or in the library. but it’s my constant companion, i bring it with me everywhere. and i knew a decent amount about poetry before yeats, but i still learned a lot from yeats. it was (and still often is) a challenge to get the most out of a yeats poem, but it’s always a reward to read and reread them.

16. if you’d grown up in a different environment, do you think you’d have turned out the same?

god no! i don’t know what i WOULD be like in any other circumstance, but i’ve had way too extravagantly odd of a life to think this shit didn’t shape me into one extravagantly odd bitch. but in the personal tragedies department, i wouldn’t really change anything. i like who i am, scars and all.

but with basic background details, everybody in my dad’s family has the exact same sense of humor, myself included. i have way too many aunts and uncles and cousins on that side, most of whom i hardly know and only see a couple of times a year at most, but through circumstances recently i’ve been in contact with a few of them that i didn’t normally talk to growing up, and it’s just fucking uncanny. like, just imagine the kind of self-deprecating and absurd personal posts i make, but imagine them being regurgitated by dozens of people older than me around a thanksgiving table (or, a couple of large tables pushed together), and most of them are male. none of us take ourselves very seriously, and it’s quite the opposite on my mother’s side. i don’t think i resemble either of my parents much in temperament, but as far as the culture they both grew up in, my influences only get clearer and clearer every day.

identity ask………oh shit

[penroseparticle]

*hits all the buttons in the elevator* birds of paradise, queen's cup, lunaria, peony, sunflower, tea rose, petunia, pansy

bird of paradise; what was the best thing that happened to you this month?

I went to my first of two tattoo appointments! I’m excited for the finished product.

queen’s cup; what are you craving right now?

I am out of Diet Cokes right now so you know, predictable

lunaria; what’s your favorite fictional universe?

Hmmmmm

FFT has one of my favorite worlds mechanically

peony; share a small random book passage that means something to you.

I have a real soft spot for the book “Squashed” which is about a teenage girl in Iowa who grows giant pumpkins, and one of the best lines from it was “I felt clunky and dumb and misunderstood”, which is honestly a very helpful phrase that I say to myself sometimes when I’m having a rough time.

However, one of my favorite parts of all time is the part where Ellie gets this ugly, loud, angry dog named Spider from her cousin Richard to watch her pumpkin Max because there are ~pumpkin thieves~ (an honest to god real life thing I am not even remotely kidding) out and about, and when he comes back the next morning we get this lovely exchange:

“He’s got to go,” I said.

“This,” said Richard, scratching behind Spider’s ears, “is the National Guard, Ellie.”

“You left me alone with him.”

“Your father was here, and Max,” Richard said, “is still here. Just in case you haven’t heard, another pumpkin bit the dust last night.”

“Where?”

“Somewhere in Circleville. That’s all I know.”

The pumpkin thieves were everywhere now.  Uncontrollable. I looked at Spider like the last woman on earth would look at the last man on earth even though he was Elmer Fudd. I adjusted.

“He has a nice face,” I said as Richard and Spider nodded.

It’s a good book if you want a teen read.

sunflower; share a favorite quote.

I actually collect quotes! I don’t wear the necklaces anymore, but I would go to those engraveable dogtag machines in like a Walmart or whatever and pay 5 bucks and get a new one. I’ve got like 40. Some of them are cheeky like 404: File not Found or quotes from friends, but a lot of them are like famous quotes. One of my favorites is 

“Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” - Robert Heinlein.

tea rose; what’s something you always wanted to do but were too scared?

I’m a bit to scared of learning to swim now, so I can’t get Scuba certified even though I really want to.

petunia; who’s story is your biggest inspiration in life? why?

Hmm… Maybe my mom? She worked two jobs, working mom, and some of the stuff she’s survived is pretty wow. Also she was a bartender when she was young AW YEAH GET IT MOM

pansy; do you like poetry?

I do! I enjoy most all poetry because most of all it’s fun with form- how the poem is written informs the content, and can do some fun and interesting things too. It’s like writing to a puzzle.