#a good reason to never stream with the camera on while drawing/animating

[jakei95]

I was curious about my irl expressions while drawing a character in extreme pain, and decided to record myself for a moment. This is a representation of how I look anytime a character is suffering.

[thefanficmonster]

You Never Notice

Sykkuno x Reader (Female)

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Summary: The center of someone’s world is never aware of their importance even when everyone else is in the know. People are hard to understand, no denying, but if we all spilled our truth like how Y/N admitted her feelings to Sykkuno, mutual understanding would be achieved a lot more easily. JK, she needed an eternity and maybe a thousand pushes. What’s important is the result though, right?

Requested by Anon. You are my first Sykkuno request and I wish I could thank you with a tag. Instead, I’m gonna thank you with a fic in which I put my all. Thank you for the request, hope the final product doesn’t let you down. 🥰

Here we go again. Sykkuno’s love life is brought up. This time it’s more frustrating cause I can’t shout how wrong he is about himself and the effect he has on the people around him. He has no room to speak, he hasn’t experienced what I have - one of your best friends living in your head rent-free because you’re just that whipped by them. That’s right kids, some of us never grow past the middle school crushes - they are a constant for some. That can be a good or a bad thing, it completely depends on how you view it.

Currently, him and Rae are addressing some dating rumors that started spreading about them earlier this week while Felix, Sean and I are kicking each other’s butts in Party Animals. We’re not all playing together, actually, we were all playing different games when we hopped into the call and just grouped together after playing solo got boring. Rae and Sykkuno are playing Among Us on a random server, her being the only person who’s streaming right now. She said she just wanted to clear up the dating rumors cause they were annoying to see popping up on her feed on every social media platform she’s active on.

“It’s ridiculous, really. People just look for online personalities to put in imaginary relationships. Are they that bored? I know quarantine is getting to everyone, but damn“ Rae says, laughing a bit to take the edge off her words but I know she’s bothered by this ordeal more than she’s letting on. I know how much it bothers her when people ship random youtubers and streamers together, even when she’s not involved. 

And I agree. Ever since I started streaming I’ve been shipped with my friends left and right. First Corpse, then Dave, Joel...you name them. It gets kinda gross cause these people are legit like siblings to me. Unlike Rae, though, I don’t waste my breath trying to clear those ‘talks of the net’ up. I don’t know if it’s for better of for worse that I remain silent on the issue when I’m involved but am willing to stand up for my friends when they find themselves in a similar situation. Some people think the reason I don’t share my thoughts is because the rumors are true, but the hint is most often taken, resulting in the ship ending. Well, that ship ending, there’s always a new one popping up. As Rae said, it’s ridiculous.

“Why does everyone think I am ever dating anyone? I’ve already commented on this: no one would date me.“ Sykkuno says through a sigh-like laugh.

“Why are you so sure?“ I blurt out without as much as a second thought

My eyes widen just a bit, just a bit. I’m not too surprised with myself. I am slowly losing control of my raging emotions and I’m afraid of what I’ll turn into when all my restraints snap. A mess, that’s the most likely answer.

“Well....“ Sykkuno trails off, clearly more than a little nervous, “I don’t have a girlfriend right now, and I haven’t had one in a while...Nor has a girl shown any interest to be more than friends with me in what feels like forever.“

“I’m sure you just don’t notice the hints girls drop. We can be pretty subtle.“ I try to sound as nonchalant as possible while I’m still in my panicked animal mode. And by animal I mean a cub. A scared cub that is now showing confidence but will run and hide right afterwards. I silently thank the universe that I’m not streaming right now. I can feel the heat on my neck and cheeks which is pure embarrassment and would have been more than evident on-camera.

“Yeah Y/N’s right, Sykkuno. Girls can be very subtle, but they will always let you know if they like you, even through the smallest of gestures. You gotta keep your eyes open.“ Rae backs me up reassuringly.

“Guys never notice anything.“ I say, rolling my eyes. I feel the pressure lessen thanks to Rae’s involvement in the conversation.

“That’s not true.“ Sean protests, “We pay close attention, especially to girls we are attracted to.“

“Yeah!“ Sykkuno pipes in again, “I’m pretty sure I would notice if a girl was dropping signals that she likes me.“

Now that stings. That legit makes me wince and cringe as though his voice delivered an actual physical hit to my chest and stomach. It’s really unpleasant, painful even.

“You never notice.“ There’s something about this triple opportunity - proving him wrong that he’d catch onto a girl’s signals; proving him wrong that girls aren’t attracted to him; coming clean about the biggest emotional struggle I’ve experienced in recent years; - that snaps my last emotional restraints. I will totally regret this later, but after the regret comes the relief which is 100% worth it. 

“What?“ He sounds very puzzled. I can just about imagine him frowning as he tries to wrap his brain around something even I can’t wrap mine around.

“You say you’d notice a girl’s hints of attraction. OK.“ I nonchalantly throw Felix off the submarine in Party Animals while I keep talking, “Would you notice if a girl purposely doesn’t kill you in Among Us when she’s impostor? Or would you notice that a girl always sends you links to videos she finds funny? Or that she always shares music and movie recommendations with you and you only?“ 

Dead silence ensues. I feel like they have all glitched, considering Sean didn’t even try to put up a fight when I lifted him and threw him in the ocean as I previously did with Felix’s avatar.

Maybe I was a tad too specific and made the whole situation hit a little too close to home for me. 

Sykkuno and I have become really close friends and we chat and play games regularly. As I mentioned, I give him movie and music recommendations and I only recently started acknowledging the fact that I’ve never killed him in Among Us. Natural instinct I guess. In fact, I feel the need for vengeance when he’s killed. I refuse to even vote for him unless it’s absolutely necessary.

Now that I think about it, it’s not his fault he has no clue. I just don’t know how to properly drop hints.  

“Um...I mean, I guess I would notice but I’d never think they are that type of hints.“ He finally replies.

On point there, dear. On damn point.

“What does it take for you to be convinced that a girl is into you?“ Who cares that a bunch of people are about to witness this outpour? It’ll make it more real, yes, but it will also help me believe that it happened so I don’t try to crawl back to the point where return is an option. No return now. You’ve already passed two thirds of the way. The last one will set you and your mind free. 

“The only way I can be sure is if she tells me, really.“ He sounds so nervous and shy, like he’s trying to draw as little attention as possible.

He doesn’t have to worry. I’m about to pull all the attention on me.

“Well in that case....you leave me no other choice.“ My screen displays me as the winner of this round of Party Animals - an easy one considering my friends are glitched in real life. “I like you, Sykkuno. I like you a lot. And I know you will see it from every context except the one its meant to be in so I’ll be even more head-on - I’ve liked you, as more than a friend for quite some time now, but buddy, you can be sooo oblivious sometimes. Anyway...“ Here’s that regret I was talking about, it’s already creeping in. “Don’t feel the need to say it back. I don’t wanna hear it if you don’t mean it. And Rae,“ I can’t help but laugh at the thought, “Sorry for making your chat go crazy. Peace!“

And I disconnect from the Discord call.

“See? That wasn’t so hard, was it?“ I say out loud, staring at my desktop. “The cat’s out of the bag and you can move on now.“

I push myself to get some work done in order to get my mind off the mess I’ve created. I’m afraid of thinking about it, I know I’ll get too upset to do anything with the rest of my day if I do.

Suddenly, just as I’m about to open my email, my phone chimes. My brain doesn’t bother to stop my arm from automatically reaching out and checking the notification. A message.

From Sykkuno.

~ I knew you didn’t suggest me ‘My Best Friend’s Wedding’ for no reason

Me ~ So...?

~ So, I’m not the only oblivious one here, Y/N

Me ~ Wait WHAT?

~ ‘Nick And Norah’s Infinite Playlist’?

Me ~ Oooohhhh...I see

It takes him a few seconds to reply, the bubble with the three bouncing dots popping up and disappearing a few times now. I just now feel my heart banging against the inside of my ribcage, my pulse echoing in my ears.

He did seem a little too eager for me to watch that movie...

~ So, movie date?

I laugh, wholeheartedly and honestly. Genuine joy running through my veins.

Me ~ So it is.

The grin that is now decorating my features promises to stay there for the rest of the day. I bite my bottom lip at the thought that pops into my head.

Me ~ Phew, I can stop sparing you in Among Us from now on

He sends me three cry-laughing emojis in return, but I don’t need those. I can just imagine him laughing as he usually does with one hand covering his mouth. And here I thought my grin couldn’t grow wider.

 Imagining him happy makes me smile. His happiness makes me happy. He makes me happy.

Even better...

I think the feeling’s mutual.

[levihantrash]

Shitty Comics and Their Shitty Artists

Levi’s pragmatism pulled the brakes. “I’m not about to dedicate my life to become a broke comic artist.”

Levi Ackerman, a gruff cleaner with an appetite for toilet humour meets the unabashedly friendly creative writing professor, Hange Zoë, who somehow ropes Levi into working on a comic with them. While the comic’s title remains undecided, Hange knows that it’s going to be set in a world where giant, human-like creatures devour other humans. Erwin Smith, the comic’s self-appointed editor, unironically thinks it’s going to be a hit. All Levi knows is that he wants to indulge in drawing this comic while hanging out with a certain writer who just won’t stop talking to him.

Where Hange, Levi, and Erwin are the creators of Attack on Titan.

Chapter 1:

“The sweets are really good here, huh?” A kind, bespectacled face appeared beside him, peering at the bulging of his shirt.

Levi had stolen from the pantry plenty of times. He had never gotten caught, so his gradual boldness could have been the problem. He had seen Mikasa, his younger sister, whenever she passed by the snacks section in the grocery store. Her gaping mouth at the sight of the colourful assortment of sweets was enough to let him know.

“I just like looking!” Mikasa said hastily. He hadn’t said anything either.

To be caught now, when he had overheard a staff member mentioning that most of the professors would be taking their leave during the summer break, was just his bad, bad luck. Objectively, he was risking his month-old job, but stealing from the pantry was much less risky than stealing from the grocery store. He began doing it weekly. Every Monday, right before the professors came streaming in, he would take a quick survey of his surroundings, and snatch two chocolate bars, sometimes a banana—only a handful. He would glance at the security camera hanging in the corner, willing it to catch him. Nobody would be petty enough to arrest a cleaner for swiping staff snacks in the pantry, right?

Levi stared back at the unfamiliar person. He recognised most of the staff by now. Only the English Literature professor, Erwin Smith, would greet him in the mornings.

“Who are you?”

“I’m Hange Zoë, the new creative writing professor. Nice to meet you!” They extended out a hand, which he felt obliged to shake, albeit warily. The hand was sweaty, and the handshake, vigorous.

“I was setting up my table and I wanted to meet everyone. Turns out most of them are on vacation,” Hange said absent-mindedly, scratching their head. The two buttons of their shirt had been mixed up, scrunching up the dress shirt's already lopsided collar. Levi resisted the urge to rebutton it for them. Today was not the day to scare off what seemed to be a genuinely welcoming person. Hange, on the other hand, found the firm handshake hilarious. What made this person so uptight?

Hange, realising that he wasn’t saying anything, breezily went, “what’s your name?”

“Levi,” he said, pushing his hands back into his pockets.

“You don’t prefer Dr. Levi?” Hange asked curiously.

“I’m not a professor. Just the cleaner,” Levi said shortly.

“Oh? Is that why you’re so secretive about the snacks?” Hange teased him, much to his chagrin.

“You rich profs have enough to eat,” Levi spat out.

Hange didn’t even blink, nodding calmly, “you’re right, it’s certainly good to make full use of the school’s resources.” Levi, sensitive to any hint of condescension, found none, though not regretting his overdose of sarcasm.

“Also,” Hange added, “I’m not going to tell anyone, I promise! So could you not look like you want to kill me and leave my dead body in the cleaning closet?”

Levi scoffed, relaxing the fists that had formed naturally by his side.

“Do you like bread?” Hange asked suddenly, scanning him for signs of the affirmative. He shrugged.

“I passed by a bakery this morning and it had the most delicious smell,” they sighed, “I was running late so I couldn’t get anything.”

“It seems like you’re kind of a mess.”

Hange laughed—this person could literally laugh at everything, Levi thought. They lifted their shoulders with their arms in the air, in a manner of “I was born like this, what do you want me to do?”

As the conversation subsided, Hange saw Levi’s eyes dart towards the neglected mop and bucket, finding it oddly endearing.

“Well then! I won’t disturb you any longer!” Hange announced. Levi wanted to tell them that they weren’t disturbing him at all, before stopping himself. His initial plan was to escape from useless small talk. Uttering such absurdity would be counterintuitive.

“Since you’re here,” Hange grabbed the last few packets of chips in the basket and stuffed them into his gigantic apron pockets, “you might as well take the rest!”

“Are you pitying me?”

“Those snacks aren’t for you,” Hange merely said cheerfully, before tentatively asking, “or am I wrong?”

“Don’t expect any favours,” Levi said begrudgingly.

He looked awkwardly at the distracted professor, who had chosen to open a chocolate bar themselves.

“Thanks…” he said, and Hange only grins, bits of chocolate and almond stuck to their teeth.

----------

Routine, that’s how it all began. Levi and Hange were seeing each other every day. In each encounter, Hange would tug out a new bread or pastry from the depths of a green, bottomless leather bag that they carried around everywhere.

Initially, Levi felt offended. “You think I can’t afford bread?” He asked, narrowing his eyes.

Hange’s eyes widened, “of course not! I want to share the joy of this bread, if you remember that bakery I was craving for,” they poked at the loaf, leaving a small dent in the middle.

With their hand still extended out, Hange scoured for words, “and you look like someone who doesn’t often indulge in little joys.”

“I didn’t ask you to psychoanalyze me.” Levi grabbed the bread, tore it into two, and pushed one entire piece into his mouth. A muffled word of thanks came out. The other half was planted back onto Hange’s palm.

“You said you wanted to share, didn’t you?”

Hange glowed in acknowledgement. They stuffed the warm bread into their mouth, cheeks full, incoherently raving about its texture. The sight of Levi chewing the bread contentedly after unexpectedly cramming it into his mouth; Hange wanted to preserve it, to immortalise this tentative pleasure. If fresh bread was what it took to achieve that, it was perfectly doable.

Levi saw it as what it was. An offering. There was really no reason to reject free bread, and if this were Hange’s version of bribery, it was innocent enough.

“Why don’t I get bread?” Erwin asked Hange, pouring himself a cup of coffee. Levi’s nose wrinkled at the overly strong aroma.

“Sorry Erwin!” Hange patted him on the back, not sounding apologetic at all, “I only have money for one friend and since Levi is my first friend here, it’s only fair, don’t you think?”

“Certainly,” Erwin said, sipping on his black coffee, eyeing a certain stony-faced individual’s violent coughing at Hange’s mention of “friend.”

“What?” Levi asked, clearing his throat one more time.

“Good day to you both,” Erwin said, sweeping past Levi to return to his desk.

Following the end of summer break, Hange became relatively friendly with their colleagues in the staffroom, who had never greeted Levi. Unbothered by the lack of formalities, Levi found himself getting along best with living things that discarded general rules of propriety. Like children, animals… and Hange. Still, when Levi trailed back to the staffroom, wet mop in hand, he found himself at a hearing distance behind Hange’s conversation with a group of colleagues.

Hange got to the point, smiling sweetly. “Why do you all pretend Levi doesn’t exist?”

There were awkward, feeble words of justification. Something about Levi being too scary. Something about Levi not greeting them first. Hange listened, eyebrows furrowing.

“You could at least say hi, right? He doesn’t bite,” Hange said coolly. Their colleagues felt the faintest chill up their spine. Levi sloshed the mop onto the floor, making his presence known. Hange barely flinched, as though expectant of his company.

“Are you talking about me behind my back?”

Hange slung an arm around Levi’s shoulders and whispered, “no, I’m telling everyone right now that you don’t get enough sleep and that’s why you’re glaring at everyone.”

Levi elbowed them away. “Who cares what people think?”

Unwrapping the bread Hange gave him, he took one significant, large bite while everyone squirmed in silence. Hange, strangely amused by the scene playing out before them, ushered Levi towards Erwin’s cubicle.

“Levi! What are your plans for today?”

“Cleaning.”

Hange clapped their hands together, “I invite you to have lunch with me and Erwin!”

“Why should I go?” Levi said, not unkindly.

“Why not?” Levi couldn’t give a good reason. Hange, latching on to Levi’s lack of refusal, took the mop away from his hands.

“You can finish cleaning later. Everyone has to eat, right?”

“Not you, apparently,” Levi muttered, remembering how Hange had straight-up not left their desk for a whole ten hours—the sun shining on their sleep deprivation at dawn until the desktop screen illuminated their exhaustion at dusk.

“That was one deadline, Levi.”

“Sure.” Regardless, he wasn’t about to decline Hange. Somehow, Hange had grown attached to Erwin, and had endless discussions with him. Conversations about writing, mostly. He didn’t participate much outside of jabbing at Hange’s ribs when the volume of their voice went over the publicly acceptable range. Otherwise, he would be shooting glares at Erwin whenever he tried to probe into Levi’s personal life. Erwin had an intensity that was difficult, near impossible to ignore.

Incidentally, the topic of comics cropped up.

“Comics?”

Hange picked up on the rare tonal shift of Levi’s voice, studying him. Erwin’s fork elegantly pierced a French fry, the screech of the fork’s contact with the plate prompting Levi to speak over it. He was positive that Erwin was trying to get him to talk. On purpose.

“Yes, I like them,” Levi conceded, draining the tea from his cup.

“I learn something new about you every day!” Hange exclaimed, as Levi gripped the edge of the cup harder.

Seemingly catching on to Levi’s discomfort, Erwin asked Hange for recommendations, telling them how he had never read any comics.

“How predictable of a literature professor,” Hange said, sitting up straighter to mock the poise of a scholar, glasses perched at the tip of their nose for the intended effect.

“You look like a fart with a stick up their ass,” Levi commented, leaving Hange howling. Erwin, the consistent gentleman, remained at ease with these disparaging jokes.

While Hange listed out their favourite comics, Levi noted that none of their top choices was marginally close to any of his preferences: in genre, in plot, and in art style.

“I like horror.”

“I don’t,” Levi countered. Hange grinned wider.

“Well, you’re scary enough as you are,” Hange considered, taking in his aloof disposition and the way he sat stiffly on the chair. Nonchalant, and could possibly decimate you.

“Look,” Hange said, thrusting an open book into Levi’s hands. “This comic is so good. It keeps me up at night.”

Levi leafed through the pages, absorbed by the clean black and white lines. That was, until he flipped a page and winced at the image of empty eye sockets, gouged out, spurting inked blood.

“You don’t like blood,” Hange said this matter-of-factly, promptly closing the book.

“I don’t like unnecessary death.”

“How do you know those deaths were unnecessary?” Erwin asked, pushing back his blonde hair in an effortlessly charismatic manner.

Levi could picture it. Erwin, a fearless leader, bringing people to greater heights.

Hange had less noble thoughts. Erwin was definitely the protagonist in a teen movie who looked older than high school age and was starring as a blonde jock whose embarrassingly lacklustre coming-of-age arc was spurred by a shy, beautiful nerd. For good reason, Hange kept their mouth shut.

“I don’t,” Levi answered, “but is any death really necessary?”

Erwin smiled, “perhaps not.” The seed of doubt grew in Levi.

Hange leaned forward across the table towards Levi, a hand covering one side of their smirking face.

“Erwin’s a lot more calculative than you think.”

Levi swatted away Hange’s strands of hair tickling his cheek, “I know,” he said half-heartedly, not wishing to contemplate the extent of its truthfulness.

Carving the last piece of meat on his plate into two, Erwin shrugged.

“So, you would say that some deaths are necessary?” Levi asked. The question blurted out on its own, slicing through the amicable atmosphere like a stray bullet. For some reason, he wanted a proper answer. Hange was busy flipping through the same horror comic book, their eyes trained on the page.

“Do you like bugs, Levi?” Erwin asked.

Levi visibly scowled. “No.”

Erwin’s fork scraped the plate insistently.  “Do you kill them?”

“Obviously.”

Erwin’s collectedness seemed impenetrable. “Would you say their deaths are necessary?”

“Necessary enough as a cleaner.”

“There, you have your answer,” Erwin said, with finality.

“I’m talking about human lives, not some insects,” Levi said, frustrated.

“Some lives matter more than others, am I right?”

“Yeah…” Levi said, struggling to grasp Erwin’s logic.

“It’s the same for us,” Erwin said cryptically.

Hange stood up, snapping the book shut. “Shit, I have to teach a class in ten!” Levi naturally stood up as well. Erwin gave a friendly wave, undeterred by the abruptness of their departure.

“See you, Erwin!” Hange called out, rushing back to the staffroom.

“Why does Erwin have to be so ambiguous?” Levi griped.

“You’re not very telling, yourself,” Hange said blithely, grabbing their laptop before marching out of the door.

Armed with constant smiles and warm words, Levi would classify Hange as someone just as enigmatic. Their discussions about writing were arguably personal, but they weren’t exactly close to the heart.

The two people Levi was becoming acquainted with in the past few weeks were a slate full of words in a language he understood, but couldn’t decipher. For the rest of the day, he compromised on these doubts by making sure the windows had not a speck of dust on them. Every moving insect was stamped out under his supervision. He thought about Erwin’s words, turning them over and over in his head. He thought about Hange’s nonchalance towards Erwin’s questions.

----------

After locking up his cleaning supplies, Levi peeled the sweaty gloves off his arms, untying the bandana on his head that kept his long fringe away, and removed his apron. Hearing a friendly shout in the otherwise deserted school building, he caught Hange coming to a stop behind him.

“You’re still here,” he said, frowning.

“Had a lot of work,” they said, armed with this reasoning every day.

“Were you listening during lunch?”

“Hmm, kind of,” Hange stated obliquely, “you know how literature people are.”

Levi was bewildered, his passive expression cracking slightly. “I don’t. As you might have realised, I don’t talk to a lot of people.”

“Literature people,” Hange rubbed their chin, eyes looking upwards in deep thought, “enjoy discussing morality in a mostly abstract, hypothetical way.”

“That’s annoying.”

Hange fell in step with Levi, who was headed to the exit, “Erwin’s one of the better ones. He’s pragmatic, and he’s not just all talk.”

“Yeah, so what’s his grand plan…” Levi said, finding the right words, “for humanity?”

“He wants to create a comic.”

Levi blinked.

“Huh? What does that have to do with morality?”

Hange looked unperturbed by Levi’s confusion, as though it were commonplace for them to defend the importance of the comic genre.

���Think of texts as a philosophical question waiting to be answered. And the questions of morality being narrativized makes their conclusions more believable. More influential. Erwin has a vision for comics to be the source of truth.”

“What truth?”

Hange grinned, “if we knew, would we need to write the comic?”

“You talk like it’s more revolutionary than it actually is…” Levi said, pushing open the door to step out of the school building.

“A comic can be life-changing,” Hange mused, admiring how the sunset decorated everything in watercolour splashes of orange and pink; a distinct nostalgic hue.

Levi remembered that Hange was, after all, a creative writing professor. “Yeah, you would say that.”

“It’s not because I’m a creative writing professor!” Hange said, impassioned. He gave them a dry look.

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Besides, Erwin wants to be the editor of the comic that I am writing,” Hange said proudly.

Levi felt that his head might explode. “Since when were you writing a comic?”

“Since last week!” Hange said, remarkably animated.

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Isn’t that what friends are for? To share things with?” Hange asked, hopeful.

That word—Levi figured that that was what they were by now. Friends. He didn’t hate the sound of it.

“You’re not going to ask what it’s about?”

“You’ll tell me if I just waited.”

“You’re right! But you see,” Hange exhaled, shaking their head despondently, “my problem is that I don’t have someone who can draw out my writing.” Levi’s hands twitched. He interlocked them into a prayer, hoping Hange didn’t notice.

“Why not just write a novel?”

Hange was unconvinced, “I’m tired of just the written word, Levi! The versatility and multimodal form of the comic are incomparable to a novel!”

Levi had to agree. “Have you been trying to find artists?”

“Yes, but none of them seemed very keen on drawing the story,” Hange said, recalling the number of people who became increasingly disconcerted upon hearing the gist of the story.

“So, what’s the story?” Levi asked.

Hange was hesitant. Levi waited.

“It’s horror, isn’t it?”

“The premise includes giant naked human beings running around eating people,” Hange said. Levi grimaced. They expected this, but it didn’t make their disappointment at his very reasonable reaction any less jarring.

“It also has a lot of blood,” Hange said. Sensing that they were one sentence away from diving into a world-building sermon, they paused.

“Do you want to hear more?”

“Maybe tomorrow,” Levi said honestly. It had been a long day.

“Of course! I’ll see you tomorrow!” Hange said, giving him a reassuring pat on the back.

“I’ll see you,” Levi said belatedly. Hange was already brisk walking towards the crowded street.

Instinctively, he called out, “Four-eyes!”

Turning back, Hange stood where they were, surprised.

“Tell me the story tomorrow.”

A gradual look of appreciation spread across Hange’s face, as their eyes arched downwards into thin curves.

“Thank you, Levi!”

Levi sidestepped Hange’s thanks with a disgruntled “tch. Whatever.”

I finally did it! I posted the first chap of the fic I've been working on for the past month *_* if you read till here... thank you!!! hearing your thoughts/comments would be nice heheh

[tarantulas4davey]

annnnd i’m supposed to be doing hw so that means it’s head canon time!

they do a q+a and someone asks about al’s nickname red (did it come from his hair or the fact that he blushes rly red) and race is like ;)) you should see how red he gets when- and al is like !!race!! and race is like WHEN i embarrass him mind out of the gutter al jeez and al’s face burns

al does a stream with tiny little braids in his hair bc race plays with his hair and race does a video where he has a bunch of butterfly clips n stuff in his hair bc al put them there and race isnt ever taking them off

race is slowly getting better at games and he’s like babe!!! there’s someone right behind you!!! and al turns and promptly gets shot point blank by race

jack was chilling on the couch once as they did a stream together and when he left they found a few drawings of them looking at the screens and also looking at each other and they’re like damn,,,,, we really do be in love

on april fools day race pours water over al and al starts freaking out and he’s like race oh my god the game setup the waters gonna ruin in oh my god oh no can i even afford an entire new setup oh god oh shit and race is like slowly panicking like babe oh crap i’m so sorry i’ll help i swear i didn’t think about that and al puts his head in his hands and race is like baby please don’t cry i’m so sorry

but al’s not crying he’s laughing, because the water didnt get into the console (race is smarter than that) and race totally fell for it and race just stops and he’s like you little-

for one of race’s videos he wants to try his art skills so he paints on al, and afterwards he’s just staring at shirtless al and al’s like uhh. you’re just staring at my abs babe and race is like oh my bad and then proceeds to stare at his arms

when they eventually do get engaged race posts smth and captions it smth about his fiancé but he’s so excited that he accidentally writes finance and everyone’s like ??? did he mean??? fiancé??? if so i’m happy for them if he’s genuinely this excited about a finance then cool i guess??

race makes an offhand comment abt stealing all of al’s shirts so he’ll just be shirtless and al is like sure race and race takes that as a challenge and the next stream al is wearing race’s hoodie (one that race had worn in multiple of his own vids) and he’s like so anyways he actually took my tops and race is like “hey at least you still have your bottom ;)” and al is like “ONE PEACEFUL STREAM RACE”

i love the hcs but for legal reasons i have to tell you to go work on your homework before you write any more because i have a ✨guilt complex✨

- race is a heathen and is constantly making jokes like this when he KNOWS albert is hyper-aware theyre on stream cause it embarrasses him b u t albert is the type that just,,,, constantly makes jokes like that regularly so if they’ve been on stream and he’s chatting with race or distracted by the discord’s banter or something he’ll casually make a joke about race using cover up on his neck in videos or something and chat will loose it and race just stares at him for a full 10 seconds like ‘😲’

- albert also did a whole stream with winged eyeliner cause race wanted to do his makeup and he refused to wash it off. race came in with bright red lipstick and left a massive kiss print on albert’s cheek before winking at the camera and walking out again to wash his face. albert 100% noticed but just left it there. race is in love with all the pictures of him from the stream with the butterfly clips and saves every piece of fanart from it to his phone for safe keeping.

- the thing i’m imagining is pubg and the animation on that makes me fucking cry laugh. just the head snapping back and then al’s character just crumbling while race is on the game floor cackling and albert is just blankly staring at his screen before he just turns to race and goes “you’re going to regret that.” very seriously. race stops laughing.

- race frames and hangs the art in their gaming room cause he thinks it’s cute. jack sees it one day like “guys- i have better ones you could’ve just a s k e d” and just gives race this massive box full of sketches of them cause they’re gross and couple-y and he teases them but they ARE a perfect character study for ‘fools in love’ and it makes for good art.

- i picture race as highly empathetic so he would immediately feel SO GUILTY if he thought albert was actually upset b u t albert cant even bring himself to feel bad cause race got trying to get him

- race is a massive al simp he frequently gets caught,,,, admiring his boyfriend (aka positively drooling over him) and it always makes albert slightly smug, which as we know, isn’t his usual state of being.

- sjhdbdhd race WOULD make a typo in engagement announcement post. albert’s comment is just “hahahhahaha FiNaNcE. good one babe” and race never ever lives it down.

- they have exactly zero peaceful streams he should be used to this by now. also he does dares for donations over $50 (cause he makes questionable choices) and someone drops $100 and just puts “i dare you to give race his hoodie back” and race just smiles like the cheshire cat. albert asks if this makes him a stripper. also when race says that “at least you still have your bottom ;)” line and winks DIRECTLY into the camera, al just gets up and pretends to leave the game room for dramatic effect.

yeah,,,,,, i’m still obsessed with this au thank you for the fantastic hcs

[steve0discusses]

S4 Ep37: Return of O R B S

Heyyyyy boy, look who’s back, it’s orbs!

So we’ve seen a lot of orbs on this show and I fully admit that I kinda started...I started feeling a kinship for the orbs. Something about these mysterious death balls of Yugioh that we see over and over just became really relatable during a pandemic. Being trapped in a bubble and unable to get close to anyone you know is such a 2020 vibe, youknow?

These orbs that are apparently so normalized in this universe that everyone is just max chilling in an orb and just doing their best at not thinking about whether or not they’ll still have to poop in this completely transparent orb in front of all of their friends.

Also, welcome back, Yugi. Apparently he was just taking a nap this entire time. That’s canon and you know what? Good for him.

And then everyone else just kinda showed up, tired, in an orb, feeling kind of frustrated because there’s literally nothing else they can do to get out of this situation. It’s basically a zoom call in 2020.

(read more under the cut)

TBH if Pegasus was in a zoom call, you know he’d just be talking about wine. You know he’d just be in a zoom call with a bunch of straight-laced teenagers just going off about the weird wine he got from a subscription box that he bought when he was day drunk a week ago. You know he’d just be like “I mean is it good? Should I keep it? Should I drink it anyway?” While popping the cork on stream and just pouring it directly into a cereal bowl.

I can feel the orb life going on here. I can especially feel Seto Kaiba, who fell asleep during the zoom call without turning off the camera.

On the other side of the room is people dying as they get sucked directly into their impending doom.

Long ago, about...last year I think...I recapped an episode from the beginning of the season where Pegasus introduced this blank card--that I assumed was blank.

But that card from that episode--it wasn’t actually blank. It was a symbolic blank card and the show runners were like “our child audience will surely get that we just don’t want to spoil the ending” as I, a full grown adult, completely thought this card was blank.

But like...this is Pegasus. You can’t just be tossing out blank cards like that!

...anyway...it’s fine, because we get a little bit more about the time that Pegasus donned that quantum hat that is sometimes square and sometimes round and then just harassed a bunch of people in Egypt until one guy tore out his eyeball and replaced it with a Christmas ornament.

I freakin have the hardest time believing this guy was married once.

PS, now I know that when you uh put people’s hair into strips like this, it’s a lot of effort to animate and it doesn’t look anything like hair. Glad Yugioh taught me that none of us ever need to do that. Ever again. Erase that idea from your to-do list, it doesn’t work.

Anyway, Pegasus lets us know that while he was trying to revive his dead wife and putting a cold compress on his new golden eye-socket, he was also like...obsessed with finding these three dragons.

And he was like “but they didn’t exist anywhere else!” He looked in outer space?? In atoms??? all over the place (this was in the show, PS, he looked on a molecular level for these duel monster dragons) until he was like “ah! That’s because they DID never exist!”

PS...are there...molecular duel monsters?

Just asking for a friend.

...so they did exist, they just had exactly the same names they do now, but were humans so I guess Pegasus just...didn’t realize that they were the same. Kinda like how when I used to read manga as a kid or watch anime and they’d go into chibi forms I thought those were different people. It’s just like that.

Anyway if dragons are turning into humans please don’t tell that to Kaiba. Blue eyes white dragon wife is much funnier as a dragon.

But like...I get that mechanically, in the game, you have to change them to human to make the cards work but...why do we care if they’re human or dragons anyway? Dartz comes from a world where most people turned into monsters. And like if no one’s trying to date them, not even Kaiba...who cares? Dartz’ wife is a freakin monster and I don’t remember seeing him divorce her at any point.

Anyway, it was an odd thing for the show to throw in there about cards we have no relationship with. It’s a complicated season, and we spent way more time on our minibosses than we ever spent with the three tragic dragon characters that are going to actually save our asses.

Now back in the soul hut, Dartz has decided to do the strategy where he convinces Pharaoh to give up. Which youknow...

The show acts like Pharaoh has any idea of who he used to be and it’s like do you even know how long Marik spent trying to teach Pharaoh anything about his past? Like Marik stood there with his back exposed and was like “I wrote it down! See? That’s about you!! Read my back scriptures!!!” and Yami kind of squinted at it and was like “Nah...” and then the island exploded.

So anyway, the only way that Dartz can convince Pharaoh to kill himself is to show Pharaoh the invite code to the orb zoom call. And so Dartz like “your friends are having so much fun in death zoom right now, don’t you want to hang one last time? Don’t you want to see what they’re up to? Don’t you want to hear them complain about working from home and how small their orb is and how their back is cramped all the time because the park is closed so they never go on walks anymore? Don’t you want to hear and secretly enjoy how much weight Joey gained from eating Doritos for 8 straight months? Don’t you want that in your life, Pharaoh?”

And then he just...decided to possess his bean because obviously that wouldn't work.

Freakin Usagi Tsukino over here.

Speaking of:

I’m also imagining that this scene in the big ol bathtub was probably...longer...in the original version? Just saying that because...what’s the point of putting a shirt on the boy? Unless it was implied that at some point you saw the whole boy? Maybe I blinked and missed a shot of the whole boy?

Anyway this scene felt heavily edited, that’s my hypothesis, if it wasn’t and someone was like “yo put a shirt on the boy” then I...don’t know what to say about that. It’s a pair of shoulders. I’m pretty sure half of their cards are racier than that.

Do you like the evidence that we have here that Tea and Tristan totally biffed it last episode? I do.

Anyway, as the Orichalcos shrinks and threatens to take Pharaoh’s soul, the puzzle taps into his dark powers, and the power of friendship and also all the minibosses who died kinda formed a ring around him and bumped the orichalcos back into place.

Nice that Mai got added to the friend pile, but only in death. Also, I’m pretty sure Alister is here and Pharaoh never met him? But there’s more of a reason as to why the mini bosses are here, since they have their own agenda outside of Pharaoh and being his best buddy so I won’t question that too much.

This is friendship from Yami’s perspective, and like...Yami kinda wants to be friends with most people. Hell, if Bakura were introduced this season, he’d be here, too. That’s just how Pharaoh rolls.

Yami decided that, although he’s a huge mess of a human being and screw it at every possible opportunity, his core isn’t made up of a dark magic curse with a crusty soul left over from some kingdom that botched it 5000 years ago. He’s decided that he’s moving on from that sort of anxiety--becoming his own sort of person--separate from Yugi, separate from his past, and separate from the powers that he’s often defined by. And it’s about time. It’s about time he recognizes that he needs to stop clinging to the ancient past (although I’m pretty sure his ancient past will be the entirety of next season)

He should give himself a real name while he’s at it, but youknow, he's not going to. Yami hasn’t quite figured out names yet.

Nightmare foreshortening, that’s what this is. Like you have to just roll a dice when you do foreshortening, and sometimes you get snake eyes, the rest of the time, you get this.

So not only are these guys voiced by Seto, Yugi, and Joey, they have faces that are like a blend of Valon, Raphael, Mai and Alister (yes that was four people for three dragon people, just go with it)--but the show doesn’t really focus on that, or at least not in this episode.

But, it does give the three mini bosses a reason to be chosen by the Orichalcos, if it’s inferred that they were some reincarnated version of the original dragons. Especially since Valon had the ability to just punch out the Orichalcos when he was still alive, and apparently that is the same thing this card does.

I can’t believe that him punching stuff was foreshadowing. I should have known. The answer in this show is always punching.

And so the episode ends with some...something that happened, but don’t ask me about it.

One of the reasons I don’t go over card games here. I mean...c’mon.

Come the freakin on.

Anyway we have some more episodes before this is over but at least this guy is at 0 hp so like...how long can you draw out one single play of cards? (I say, knowing they can stretch this game out...infinitely)

anyway, here’s where you can read these from the top. Hope y’all are staying safe!

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

[thatmomentwhen345]

Ok ummmmmmmmmmmmmm

These last two weeks have been very emotionally exhausting because of finals and what I’m about to tell you and I don’t really know how to sum it up so I guess you’re getting the same treatment as my Facebook (this is copied directly from the post on there and was posted on December 12th for context)

(This is the beginning of the Facebook post)

You guys, I don’t know what to do.

You might have gathered from my last few posts, but I’m not okay. And it will sound like such a stupid reason to the majority of you. But I made an irreversible mistake back in 2019 that has been haunting me for the past week. This is the first time that I can remember regretting a decision this much. Was it my stubbornness, my closed-mindedness? Was it my see-it-to-believe-it tendencies? Was it my inability to learn from my mistakes?

For those who don’t know, on November 13th of this year, the YouTube channel Unus Annus was deleted from the platform forever. After one year of daily videos by Markiplier and CrankGameplays, it was all gone. The point of the channel was to remind us to use our time that we have alive wisely, because Memento Mori. Remember that you must die.

The channel started on November 15th of 2019, and, well, I don’t know anything about their beginnings. I just saw their introduction video in my recommended or on trending or something and thought, “Is that Markiplier? Shouldn’t he be focusing on his own channel? Who’s this other guy?” and moved on without a second thought. I occasionally saw their videos in the trending tab but ignored them. I didn’t even know they had such a big following. I thought it looked stupid and didn’t think about it until, well, the end.

A few weeks ago, my brother was watching the final livestream that would mark the day that the channel was deleted for good. I was in the room with the livestream on the TV, watching their final hours tick by, still not thinking about the channel at all. Just like, oh hey that thing that people were talking about, wasn’t it like, a cult? I didn’t think about it at all until... the fifth of December? Was it really only a week ago? That feels like a lifetime away now...

The YouTuber FootofaFerret released a video called “Pretending Unus Annus Isn’t Over” and I saw it in my reccomended. https://youtu.be/8SMpCbI9U00 I was like, hey, yeah, I remember that thing that ended. I trusted Foafy’s judgement because of his previous videos about saying goodbye to Steven Universe. So I watched it and don’t really remember how it made me feel. I just remember him saying that the Unus Annus fandom was in mourning and I was like “aw poor guys I’ve seen on TikTok some people are sad about it”. Foafy also suggested that people who were wanting more of the Unus Annus vibe to watch Mark’s Markiplier Makes playlist. I watched some of them and, again, moved on.

The timeline is fuzzy from here on. I’m still processing it, honestly. I think I might have looked up the Unus Annus theme (Turncoat by Michael Rothery) first? Then I think I found some compilations or clips from their videos and was like wow this stuff is funny. And then I realized that there are archived versions of all of their videos (that’s against the rules of Unus Annus for those who don’t know) and... don’t hate me... went looking for them. I watched two in full. I won’t say which two but just know that the second one I specifically searched out because I knew that they did a lot of random stuff on there and that there was a chance that they would do it too. And they did! It was a funny video. I realized how much of a fun dynamic that Ethan and Mark had and looked for more compilations. The more I watched, the more I realized that I had made a terrible mistake in 2019.

I had missed out on so much. And I couldn’t take it back without breaking the rules. The concept of Unus Annus intrigued me so much, all of the people involved on the channel worked so well together, they were all so funny, but now I could never experience it in full because I was stubborn and, well, thinking about other things this year. I could have jumped in at any point between then and November 13th of this year but I chose not to.

Monday was a rollercoaster. 1st stage: denial. I was like well this doesn’t matter, I’m not even in the UA fandom, it’s gone and I don’t care. But it wasn’t that simple of course. I kept watching the Markiplier Makes videos and the UA compilations and became particularly interested in Ethan. He seemed very genuine and sensitive and his on-camera chemistry with Mark was really entertaining. 2nd stage: anger. I was furious at myself for missing out. Those two videos I watched in full were just small teasers for what the entire channel was like. I hated that I couldn’t take it back. And I hated that if I did, I would’ve broken the rules and gone against Mark and Ethan’s wishes, which I also wouldn’t be able to take back. I was horribly conflicted. 3rd stage: bargaining. I desperately went after any content surrounding Unus Annus that I could without breaking the rules, and was still considering watching the illegal archives. I haven’t watched any more of them in full, but sometimes I watch parts of them in incognito mode when it becomes too much to bear.

Tuesday was... Tuesday had to have been the longest day I’ve had the entire year. 4th stage: depression. It was slowly sinking in, the gravity of my mistake. I was starting to realize how much of a phenomenon Unus Annus was and that it was so unique and had such a cool message and that it made so many peoples’ 2020 just a little bit better, but not mine. I then did what I always do and found my comfort in music. I put on a bunch of good songs that I hadn’t heard in a while and just... sat there painstakingly doing my math homework. I couldn’t concentrate on anything the whole day. Monday, either. The song Goodbye to a World by Porter Robinson came on and I was like hey, this song perfectly suits the way I’m feeling right now. I wondered if anyone else had made connections between this song and Unus Annus and looked to see if there had been any AMVs (animated music videos) about the idea and the end of UA. Lo and behold, this popped up and I watched it! https://youtu.be/-q-oByQWdlM It hit all the right spots and I just started bawling. What had I done? Why had I missed this opportunity to improve my 2020, just a little bit? Why had I missed this opportunity to get to know Mark and Ethan better? Everyone who had watched all of their videos could feel peace after the end, like Mark and Ethan. But I couldn’t. I could only forever regret my mistake. MY mistake.

Terrible things have happened this year, but all of them have been out of my control. This, however, was my fault. And I can never take it back. And I am having a very hard time handling that.

I don't know how many times I cried on Tuesday. The next song to come on after I watched the AMV was As the World Caves In by Matt Maltese which of course broke me even further. This song also perfectly encapsulated my dilemma. Later I finished my tribute drawing of the channel logo and felt the smallest bit better. The rest of the day is a blur.

Wednesday was better, I guess? I thought I had made it to the 5th stage: acceptance. I was still very sad and mad at myself but I was starting to realize that there was nothing I could do. I subscribed to Ethan’s channel and started getting to know him better. He’s so sweet and talented ☺️

But no, acceptance is still far away. Thursday and Friday were barely better than Tuesday. I painted my nails black and white as a way of coping. I went to a livestream on Ethan’s Twitch and it was really fun! I started watching more of his streams and on one of them he mentioned that his Twitch chat mods had TikToks. So I wondered if he also had a TikTok, which he does! I looked to see if he posted one on the day UA ended. The answer was no but he did post one the day after asking if someone with the skills required could make a mashup of the song Cancer by My Chemical Romance and As the World Caves In. https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJqgyrkR/ I was like wowie this guys got taste! And so I looked up if there was a mashup. As a matter of fact, there was one by Clem Turner on YouTube that came out only three days after the end of Unus Annus. https://youtu.be/a5RTVoreSAY I cannot express how much I love this, what it made me feel, and how much it hurt/helped. So I commented on Ethan’s TikTok about it and only a few hours later a new comment appeared on Clem’s video. Ethan had seen it! So I’m just gonna assume I was responsible for that... not only that but half of the comments on the mashup were about Unus Annus as you can see below. I realized how big of a following UA had and felt bad (because of course the people who had actually been with UA the whole way would be grieving a lot more than me), but also, comforted by the fact we could all connect over the loss of something important to them, if in a lot of different ways.

I’m far from getting over this. I’m far from being okay. I’ve never really felt like this before. I feel like a different person than I was last week. But I wanted to write all this down to let it out, process it a little bit, and maybe get some comfort from you guys. It’s completely understandable if you didn’t read this all the way through so...

TLDR: Memento Mori.

(This is the end of the Facebook post)

What I just described really shifted a lot of things in my head in a way I didn’t expect and in a very short amount of time. So, long story short, my Steven Universe hyperfixation ended very suddenly because of an outside factor and I probably won’t be posting a lot about it anymore. Hope you understand.

(art by me but I used the official UA logo as a reference)

[maybe-i-dreamt-u]

Some Jean Moreau Headcanons that nobody asked for because I love him so so much and I miss him and his grumpy face

Buckle up cause this is a long one oh my god

He can draw, like, so incredibly well, he can sketch anything in a matter of minutes and it looks so good

Once Jeremy notices he leaves him a nice lil sketchbook on his desk with only an anonymous note ((because I can fucking BET  that he’s as bad at receiving gifts as Neil))

Anyway. Once he gets that sketchbooks he starts carrying it everywhere and draws everything that catches his eye- it’s a nice distraction from his thoughts and memories + he wasn’t really allowed to do any of that with the Ravens, so he’s enjoying it as much as he can now

Jeremy’s heart swells whenever he sees him drawing, but nobody needs to know about that

within a month the sketchbook is full of drawings, mainly the trojans, stray cats he sees on the street and pretty places in California

also like half the drawings are of Jeremy

it’s not his fault, they live together, of course he’s gonna have a lot of drawings for Jeremy, sTOP JUDGING HIM 

nobody really gets to see what’s in the sketchbook, he’s very good at keeping it closed, and nO NOT BECAUSE OF HIS DRAWINGS OF JEREMY AND HIS HANDS GOD DAMNIT

he still keeps all of them though.

yes, all of them, as soon as the first one is finished, he somehow finds a new one on his desk

hm I wonder how that happened

anyway

he also likes writing

not necessarily writing stories or anything he just

likes writing

by hand

he used to have really pretty handwriting

it was cursive and it looked amazing

he was so proud of it

but it’s kinda hard to have pretty handwriting after having broken 6 of your fingers

but he’s getting there again

slowly, but surely

he gets himself a journal and a fountain pen or some fancy shit

and he just decides that he wants to have pretty handwriting again

and so he starts writing about whatever’s on his mind

whether it’s some Exy strategy, the specific colour of Jeremy’s hair in the sunlight, or a new card game Laila and Alvarez taught him, he writes it down, as writing exercise

well, partly as writing exercise

in part he also wants to document the beginning of his new life and his newly found happiness

By the time he goes pro his handwriting is as beautiful as ever

everyone envies him for it

and don’t even get me started on his signature

also, I might have said this before but consider

Jean Moreau wearing rings. silver or black bands around his fingers

I fully believe that if aftg was from another era, Jean would wear those short, black gloves, you know the ones I mean. as it is though, he’ll settle for rings the colour of his eyes, that add a little bit of shine to his mostly black outfits

if he’s feeling particularly rebellious he might add a chain around his neck, but it’d take a while for him to get comfortable enough around the trojans to do that

while rooming with the trojans he gets to witness them play a bunch of video games

Laila and Alvarez do twitch streams and you cannot change my mind about that

and sometimes they invite him and Jeremy to their streams

Jeremy is happy to obliege, Jean not so much

but even if he doesn’t appear on camera or whatever, his commentary is almost always audible in the background

and everyone loves his wry jokes and plain rudeness towards the protags of the games

they’ve gotten him to play with them a couple of times

but one game that he hates with a passion

one game that he feels has personally offended him

is Minecraft

you will never see him play Minecraft and he will always degradingly stare at anyone who mentions playing or enjoying the game

he doesn’t have a reason, he simply hates it and that’s it

also, he hates american shows and movies

you’d say he’d have gotten used to it in what, 10 years? but no. if he ever watches tv, which he rarely does, but if it happens, it’s either european ((see: French)) movies, or anime

he likes anime because it allows him to practice his Japanese without thinking of Riko and the master, he can think of the language and not immediately think of pain and suffering

his favourite is Tokyo Ghoul 

also, sometimes when Renee visits, they watch hxh together

speaking of Renee

they always go on picknicks together, and it’s always somewhere with a lot of flowers

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, Jean loves flowers

he loves looking at them, he loves smelling them, loves taking care of them, drawing them, journaling about them, everything

he loves how you can say a million words with a single flower

and also, how delicate and elegant they are

say what you want, but I feel like Jean is actually very delicate and gentle to his core

like yea, ever since he was sold to Moriyama and forced to become a raven, he had to be more violent

he had to be violent to be a raven and he had to be violent to play Exy and to be by Riko’s side

but I feel like if he could, he would do a totally different sport, like figure skating or something like that

as it is though, he has to deal with Exy and its violent nature

at least he’s a trojan now

he can relearn to be himself

be the person he wants to be, the person he feels he is at the bottom of his heart

because he’s finally with people that love him and he’s finally free

or well, as free as you can be, while still technically being the Moriyama’s

anyway that’s it for now

sorry, this got a lot longer than I intended it to be

uhh if you’ve come this far thanks? and I hope u enjoyed:))

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #347

“lay your head down, child  /  i won’t let the bogeyman come  /  count the bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war drums”

Have you ever watched a whole hour long infomercial? Ha, Girt and I have one day when he was hanging out. It was about a vacuum, to be precise. Do you tend to cave into peer pressure? No. Do you think it's attractive for a man to wear eyeliner? Yeah. Are you listening to music currently? Yeah, it's this version of Manson's "Lunchbox" that I hadn't heard before. Have you ever done something you once thought you'd be too chicken to do? Yeah, like going on this one ride at a fair. Y'know, the kind that slowly brings you way up and abruptly drops you. What's your relationship to the child you’re around most? They're my nieces and nephew. Have you ever had an illegal substance in your blood stream? No. What is the worst thing that has ever happened to your hair? More than once, back when I had long hair, it would get so knotted from neglect that I'd brush out just... giant clumps of hair. The joys of depression, right? It's honestly part of the reason I cut it all off, and it's something I seriously recommend for people who struggle with brushing their hair. What do you think about cats? I adore them. Who do you want with you when you're afraid? Absolutely my mom. Who might as well just be your sibling? Ha, Sara. We're just so remarkably similar, and even when we first met in person, we clicked like it was nothing. Would you ever consider working for the government? No; I'm not working with corrupt, lying motherfuckers. What is the weirdest thing you have ever witnessed a sibling doing? Well, your sister "sleepwalking" or whatever she was actually doing and grabbing a knife she'd hidden under her mattress to creep towards her then-boyfriend was beyond just "weird." Your first best friend's name? Brianna. How do you act when you're uncomfortable? "Anxious, impatient, and fidgety." <<<< Same. It's very obvious I want to get out of the situation. What bug would you like to be extinct? Do wasps do like... anything for the environment? I don't want to give a definite answer here that ends up being ignorant, because I appreciate bugs that are even just a regular food source for more vital creatures like spiders, but I don't know a damn thing wasps do that are beneficial. They just kill bees, from what I know. Do you know anyone other than a cop who has ever owned a cop car? No. Have you ever felt fire? I mean, I've never directly touched fire, no. What would you do if your first love asked you back out? I REALLY DON'T WANT TO PICTURE THIS. Do you know anyone that is a lesbian? Yeah. What are your thoughts on roleplaying games? I think they're fun. Do you want to have a bachelor/bachelorette party before you get married? So, true story, I don't even know what those entail exactly. But considering how few friends I have, I probably wouldn't. Ever been texted by mistake and played along & acted like you knew them? No. Would you ever get a name tattooed on you? Noooo sir. Do your parents dress like they’re years younger? Does it gross you out? They don't, but it wouldn't gross me out...? They can dress however they damn well please. Obsession from childhood? Dinosaurs and Spyro probably top the list. Favorite activity to do in warm weather? Just swim, really. I hate warm weather. Favorite activity to do in cold weather? If there's snow, take pictures. If it's just cold, then I like to just stay inside and bundle up in bed. Five songs to describe you? I don't know five, but I know a few I resonate with: "Get Up" by Mother Mother, "That's What You Get" by Paramore, uhhh then idk. Best way for someone to bond with you? Hm. Probably just like... talk about life, like our stories and things we've been through, both good and bad. Just being mutually vulnerable makes me feel connected to people. I like bonding via music, too, and I find it pretty exciting to share songs and, once again, go deeper and share what they mean to you, etc. etc. In summary, I just like getting to know a person at their core. What is the first meme you remember seeing? Hell if I know. Lemonade or tea? Lemonade, by a landslide. Sci-fi, fantasy, or superheroes? Fantasy. Favorite type of cheese? American. If you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? I relate very deeply to Henry Townshend from SH4 with saying "what the hell?" about literally everything. If you were an anime character, what genre of anime would it be? I'unno. Character you relate to? Since watching a playthrough of the game the first time, I've related to Max Caulfield from Life is Strange very deeply. An awkward photographer that cares a lot for people. Favorite website from your childhood? Webkinz. Least favorite flavor of food or drink? Grape, usually. Or orange. Favorite potato food? French fries. PC or console gaming? I prefer console games. Writing or drawing? Shit man, why you gotta make me choose? I feel much more satisfaction after drawing something I'm proud of, but I write way more. Who would you put before everyone else? My mom. How many phone numbers do you have memorized? Literally none. Do you get motion sickness? No. Have you ever been on a cruise? No. Have you ever bailed a friend out of jail? No. Have you ever won anything from a radio station? No. What do you do when you go to the beach? Swim for a while and then sit under the tent or whatever we brought and think about how ready I am to go home and get out of the heat. How many pillows are on your bed? Two. Do you like pickles? Yeah. Do you like camping? I've never been *legit* camping; Dad would just sometimes set up the tent in the yard and he and my sisters and I would sleep out there. I LOVED that as a kiddo. I think I'd enjoy like, one night of actual camping, so long as I have my camera and phone. My technology dependence would probably get me by Day #2, lol. Have you ever ridden a motorcycle? No, and I don't plan to. Wrecking in one of those can fuck you the hell up. Even with a helmet, just honestly, it seems... pretty stupid to put yourself at THAT incredible a risk. Have you ever had plastic surgery? No. Were you ever sent to the principal’s office as a kid? I don't think so... but maybe once? I have this super faint memory of being in the office, but maybe I was bringing them something from my teacher? That sounds about right. Have you ever used a slingshot? No. Have you ever driven an electric car? No. Do you live in an area that is prone to tornadoes? They happen here, but I wouldn't say we're "prone" to them. We get tornado watches/warnings a lot when we have summer storms, but it's seldom they actually occur, and it's even rarer for them to be noteworthy at all. What breed was the last dog you saw? One of our neighbors has a German Shepherd she walks a lot. How long have your parents been together (or how long were they together, if they no longer are): I wanna say around or over 20 years? I don't know. What 5 words best describe your mother’s personality? Loving, welcoming, resilient, selfless, and strong. Do you know any transgender people? Yes. Have you ever had a parrot sit on your shoulder? No, but that'd be cool. In the morning, do you eat breakfast first or brush your teeth first? I eat first. What’s something you’ve been struggling with lately? A number of things, but my weight's the real problem right now. All the weight loss progress I once made has almost been entirely erased... and I'm extremely, extremely upset about it. I'd rather move onto the next question than elaborate on this bullshit. Do you carry condoms? No, I don't have a reason to. Would you date someone with braces? Yes. Do you think people look up to you? God no. How often do you have trouble sleeping at night? Pretty much every night. Any vacations planned? No. We've never been able to afford vacations. Who were you last in a car with? My mom. Did you ever watch Sailor Moon? Yeah. My older sister was ooooobsessed. She even had the little toy wand and would dance to the theme when it came on. What do you want for Christmas? Well, it's rather early to think of that, but if I had to pull out an answer right now, it'd probably be either Venus' new terrarium (if I don't already have it) or supplies for it. If by some miracle I've been able to get everything I wanted for it by then, I would seriously love a hognose snake. If you had to get glasses would you wear contacts? I've worn glasses for many years, and I can live with it. I'd prefer contacts so I can get an undereye dermal piercing, but they're just too tedious for me. Best party you’ve ever been to? Maybe a big party my friend Summer had for one of her birthdays many years ago. We played lots of games like darts and stuff while listening to good music and just hanging out. Have you ever been surfing? I have not. Are you thinking about asking anyone out? No. Pink lemonade or regular lemonade? Pink. Chocolate or strawberry milk? Chocolate, for sure. I hate strawberry milk. Are you subscribed to a lot of channels on YouTube? Oh yes. Do you wish you had a better phone? Yeah. I mean, my phone is fine, but I particularly dislike the poor camera quality. Do you find texting fun? I'm officially becoming an old woman in that I don't really like texting anymore, but only because I make way too many typos. I would much rather type via an actual keyboard. Do you have any friends who have had twins? No. Do you have any past mistakes you’ve made that haunt you every day? Yes. Seriously. Are you bothered by something someone said to you years ago? Things especially Bryar and Colleen have said to me are probably going to die with me.

[precuredaily]

Precure Bonus Day

Film: Futari wa Precure Splash Star - Maji Doki 3D Theater Date watched: 30 July 2019 Original release date: July 2006 Screenshots: https://imgur.com/a/CDVdcnl Project info and master list of posts: http://tinyurl.com/PCDabout

IN THREE DEE

This is the last bit of exclusively Splash Star-related media I’ll be covering. This 12 minute short film was released in IMAX theaters in July of 2006. I can’t find a more precise release date but date-wise it was around the Kiryuus’ face turn and continuity-wise it fits anywhere between episode 19 and 24, as the girls are in their summer school uniforms, Moop and Foop are not around, and they use the Twin Stream Splash finisher. Anyway, the reason they released this short film was to show off the latest 3D film technology (this was a couple years before Avatar really kickstarted the modern 3D cinema fad) so there’s a lot of exaggerated depth shots and objects coming straight towards the camera, which in 3D would look like they’re coming out of the screen right towards you. Presumably, Toei determined that it wasn’t in their interests to further pursue this technology, they didn’t make any other 3D movies until about 2008 or 2009, and the only other Precure 3D movie they made was a short All Stars film in 2011, which I will cover in due time. I’m not sure what the exact technology was they were trying to showcase, and maybe we’ll never know because the only home video release of this movie came 6 years after the fact and it was converted to 2D. If you’ve ever watched a gimmicky 3D movie that was downgraded to 2D you know the result is silly, and this is no exception. Thank goodness it’s short. But this preamble has gone on long enough so let’s dig in.

The Plot

The Seed of Hope has been spotted and poses a threat to Dark Fall’s mission, because it will spread more and more hope to people, so Akudaikaan tasks Gohyaan with tracking it down and destroying it. Gohyaan uses his own seed, the Seed of Despair, to find it. Meanwhile, Saki, Mai, Flappi, and Choppi are out and about when Flappi sprouts a bud on his head. He’s frustrated because it won’t come off, Saki is laughing at him, and Mai just wants to draw it instead of helping. Suddenly the Seed of Despair appears as a giant floating eyeand identifies the bud as the Seed of Hope. It quickly buries itself in the ground, sprouting a tree that sprouts a bunch of gremlins.

Saki and Mai transform and fight the plant monsters (they don’t call themselves Uzainaa, they only yell out “Zetsubou!” or “despair”) but there are too many of them and they run away. A giant Seed of Darkness pops out of the ground and swallows them whole and they fall through its guts (a dark cavern) in a sequence that was probably a lot better in 3D, before it spits them out and they fall through the rain into another dark chasm, where they’re bound by vines.

Gohyaan mocks them for having hope and wanting to do trivial things, saying the seed of despair will consume all their hope. The girls are weak but thinking about all the things they want to do, spending time with their friends and families and enjoying life, renews their motivation, and the sprout on Flappi’s head begins to bloom. A pair of giant claws reaches towards them from the dark but they’re powered up by the Seed of Hope and they manage to break its grip and the vines, and suddenly they’re standing on a cliff as a giant Uzainaa made of roots stretches out.

They jump and dodge for a bit but they quickly finish it off with Twin Stream Splash. The uzainaa dissipates into what appear to be spirits from the Fountain of Gold, but instead of a Miracle Drop in the middle it leaves the Seed of Darkness. Mai catches it and it glows and cracks open to reveal a flower, which flies off. Saki comments that it’s spreading hope now. Suddenly the flower on Flappi’s head also blooms into a large dandelion, going from flower to fluff, and then blowing away in the wind. The rest of the flower disappears from Flappi’s head and the girls comment that a lot of hope is now lowing out into the world, then Saki optimistically remarks that she’ll be in top form tomorrow too, and the credits roll.

The Analysis

This little short is trying to do a lot at once. It’s certainly not bad, but it’s not good either. The 3D effects are rarely overwhelming, especially since I can’t actually view it in 3D, but they do tend to be distracting enough that I was forcibly reminded that I was watching it in the wrong format. The biggest problem with this movie is that it was made for 3D IMAX but its only home video release was on a 2D DVD, six years after the fact. I can see high quality backgrounds that get shredded in the video encoding. The character models appear to be TV quality but the animation is fluid with some vibrant fight scenes. There is some ugly blending of cell and CG animation that doesn’t layer well and a lot of times these are also the gimmick shots that remind you it’s 3D, so it’s really jarring. The girls’ faces are frequently drawn off-model and that is also a little disconcerting. I assume this was put out in a bit of a rush so the budget was probably tight, but there were enough good quality shots that it’s more noticeable when something isn’t up to par.

The plot is kind of silly and doesn’t give you enough time to absorb the information before it rushes into the next setpiece. One moment the girls are fighting in the woods, then they’re falling down a bottomless tunnel, then they’re in the air, then they’re in a chasm, then they’re on a cliff. It all goes by so fast and the transitions don’t make much spacial sense as we aren’t shown how A turns into B. Again, a lot of the locations and camerawork are picked out to showcase the 3D effect, and it becomes obvious with just how much time is spent on certain shots. However, while it’s fast-paced, the simple story is given adequate build-up and resolution to not feel rushed. Bloom and Egret yelling about how they like the small things in life and being powered up by the hope of seeing their friends and family again is really sweet and tender and resonant.

I would have loved to see this movie in IMAX 3D to see if the effect of everything is better in that format, but as I can’t I have to try to imagine what it was like. Despite a lot of “in your face” shots, it was an enjoyable experience from start to finish and a good, short adventure with the girls. I can’t knock it for being experimental because it delivers on what it promises. All that to say, I liked it.

Next time on Precure Daily, it’s the long-awaited FWPC era overview! When will I have that out? Maybe by this time next week but I’m not making any promises. Look forward to it whenever, and hey, if you’re new here, take the time to look back at my older reviews. I’ve got 150 of them for you to digest so there’s plenty to keep you occupied.

Pink Precure Catchphrase Count: 1 Zekkouchou Nari!

Heroes Never Give Up Count: 1 zettai ni akiramenai!

[hastyslug21]

Victor Creed & the Witness to his Crimes

Description: You witnessed Victor Creed murdering your coworkers. He has taken you and entrapped you.

Warning: some smut, lots of blood, & a lotta description.

Disclaimer: I don't own Victor Creed (he owns mah heart :') nor do I own any diners named Randall's. I just came up with a random name to suit the diner in this story.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Y/N was walking briskly along upon the damp sidewalk at night. The thought of getting kidnapped or mugged made the quiet yet dark atmosphere about her all the more terrifying, and so she quickened her pace. She looked every which way constantly, especially behind, to see if any hooded stalkers were trailing after her. For added assurance, she clutched tightly onto her mace in her coat pocket.

Y/N would have gotten a cab if it weren't for the fact that the only thing that awaited her on the streets were tumbleweeds rolling by under the luminescent glare of the lamplight. And besides, Randall's diner wasn't that far off and it was better than calling and waiting for an Uber to arrive. Her coworker, Maudie, had a last minute family emergency call and implored Y/N to swap shifts just for one night.

"Just this once, and I'll owe ya," Maudie pleaded with her crinkling blue eyes, hands clasped together imploringly.

"O-Okay," Y/N stammered out timidly.

After a long while, Y/N finally saw the flashing neon sign, Randall's, up ahead. With relief, she speed-walked towards the entrance and entered.

She stopped dead in her tracks.

The whole place was void of any living creature save for herself. Y/N felt her stomach tighten and a thrill of fear reverberated throughout her whole being at the most chilling sight: a puddle of blood up ahead of her.

The scarlet puddle was smeared, as though the owner of the blood was dragged. The trail of crimson led behind the counter. Y/N, horrified at such a gruesome picture, felt goosebumps blooming on her arms. With shaky hands did she manage to take out her phone and dialed the police.

"AAAAAHHHH!----"

Frightened beyond all reason, Y/N dropped her phone and was shaking all over in terror. Her heart sped fast and faster; adrenaline pumping hotly through her veins as her instincts yelled, "Run! Leave now!". But, she recognized the person who voiced those screams. Owen.

'I have to help him,' Y/N desperately thought, unintentionally forgetting completely about the police and willed herself to propel forward toward the counter. The door leading to the kitchen behind the counter stood slightly ajar, the trail of blood leading inside.

Y/N breathed shakily as she pushed the door open with a trembling hand. It squealed wide open to reveal a combination of the most revolting sight and scent that would've made her puke horribly at that moment had not at the same time she felt too paralyzed by fear to do anything at all, not even to run.

Puddles of gore and drops of crimson were splattered about the kitchen, the whole place reeking of metallic copper. Y/N saw the cook lying dead over his stove, mouth agape in horror with his eyes lifelessly staring ahead. Another dead body laid on the black-and-white tiled floors near to the cook.

But, that's not what shocked her into paralysis.

Several feet before her, there stood a man in a long, black trench coat. He slowly slid his talon-like claws out of a man's neck and dropped him.

Owen, the manager of Randall's, lay gasping out his last breath with pools of blood trickling out of his mouth and rivulets of crimson streaming out of his neck at the feet of his murderer.

The murderer didn't take any notice of Y/N standing at the doorway, who was quaking and taking deep shuddering breaths. He simply plucked a white handkerchief from Owen's breast pocket and cleansed his talons of the fresh blood.

'Go, go, go, go...,' Y/N pleaded to herself in her mind, but her fright was like heavy weights in her legs; unable to lift them up despite her heart swelling in fear at the thought of her life ending by choking on her own blood.

She managed a shuffle with one foot backwards. The murderer slowly slid his indifferent gaze from his talons to Y/N as she did so. A chill of dread settled in her stomach and startled her out of her paralysis.

She turned and ran, rushing to the other side of the counter and heading straight for the doors.

Tears seeped from her eyes, blurring her vision, but, alas, she slipped on the puddle of blood and hitting her forehead on the corner of a table, she blacked out.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Y/N sluggishly opened her eyes. She winced at the sharp pain that throbbed on her forehead. She tried sitting up, but groaned at the pounding within her head and settled her head back onto the throw pillow.

Her arms ached and she found that they were bound together underneath her back. She looked down to her feet, which were tied together as well, and with a jolt of realization, she remembered all that had passed before she was knocked out.

Panic began to choke her.

Y/N struggled into a sitting position, swinging her legs over the edge of the couch. What she saw before her sent a thrill of shock that stilled her.

Owen's murderer was sitting on the edge of a bed, looking at her intently. Upon seeing the terror flashing in her eyes and her lower lips wobbling, Victor Creed relished the surging feeling within him at making someone so dull and ordinary cower from him in fear.

She reeked of fear so much, Victor could practically touch it; hearing the quaking of her breaths, tasting the saltiness of her cold sweat breaking from her forehead and smelling the damp scent of lavender cream from her palms moist with anxiety.

One corner of his lips curled upwards in amusement, revealing his fanged tooth.

"Hi," Victor greeted, his smile appearing sadistic to Y/N.

"Are....are you going to--to kill me?," Y/N whispered out, her voice cracking due to her throat tightening as she struggled to hold back her tears.

"Well...," Victor started, examining his nails, which grew to a startling length right before Y/N's widening eyes, "If I wanted to kill you, you'd be joining the pile of dead bodies at that third-rate diner."

'A mutant,' Y/N thought. Involuntarily, she let out a choked sob, but suppressed it when Victor slowly roved his eyes from her feet to her face. Her skin prickled underneath his predatory eyes.

"I always did love a good chase, but, what a joykill you were when you slipped and knocked yourself out cold," his husky voice rumbled out, a bemused smile accompanying it.

He ambled his way over to the couch, shrugging off his coat and leaving it on the floor as he said: "I was going to kill you, but...," he left off, standing behind her and settled his hands on both of her shoulders. One of his hands slowly slid up her neck, his talon-like nails grazing her flesh, the pressure of his claws gradually digging into her skin.

His hand was now grasping tresses of her hair as he continued,"...When I held you in my arms, you were like a frightened little mouse, even in sleep. So fragile. So frail."

Upon emphasizing that word, he harshly yanked her hair to the side, with Y/N yelping out in pain. His other hand dug deep into her shoulder, tears starting to burn within her eyes.

Resisting the urge to sink his fangs into her neck to sate his cravings for blood, he pressed his cheek to her own, his mutton chop roughly scratching at her smooth cheek.

"Why don't you scream? I didn't gag you, there certainly are people around to hear you; you could yell for help," Victor encouraged with a sinister grin.

'You'd kill me sooner rather than later,' But Y/N didn't voice her thoughts and just closed her eyes to endure the talons that were piercing into her shoulder agonisingly, droplets of tears streaking down her cheeks. Displeased at her silence, he dug his sharp talons further, drawing blood.

She cried out in pain. Satisfied with that, Victor retracted his claws and murmured softly, "It would be in your best interest to never displease me. I can snap your neck at any moment."

Victor pressed his warm lips to Y/N's feverish skin, lavishing her flesh with a sweep of his hot tongue, licking up the blood. Heat fluttered within her stomach as he hotly licked at her wounds again.

"Ca-cameras....," Y/N managed to blurt out.

Victor lightly held her chin between the sharp tips of his talons and turned her face towards his own.

"What?," Victor inquired in a low voice.

"The-the cameras a-at Randall's...the police will see it. They'll f-find you," she stammered out, frightened of his face looming so menacingly close to her. A smirk bloomed upon his face.

A chuckle escaped from him as he said, "I'm not so careless as you may think."

He pushed her flat onto her back, climbed over the couch and slid down to straddle her waist, proceeding to say: "I may have been born as a human, destined to grow up as a man battling the animal inside of him. Fortunately for me, I've become something more. And, like an animal, I cave into my desires. The thirst to kill, for slaughter, to see blood spill out of lifeless carcasses. And--," he leaned down to croon seductively into her ear, "--to mate."

Y/N was mesmerized by the feral yet seductive look in his grey eyes that were half-lidded, accentuating the lust within them.

He moved his talons from her chin and traced a sharpened nail lightly onto her lower lips until he pricked a spot that oozed a pinpoint of blood.

In a moment, her bloodied lips were ravished by Victor, suckling at the blood on her lower lips. He parted her lips forcefully and his hot tongue darted in and dominated her, all of her. Her veins pulsated hotly and her heart beats were racing, not in fear, but in being ravished so possessively. He marked her as his property with the hot, insistent sweeps inside her mouth, massaging her lips feverishly with his own, making her moan and become dizzy from the heady sense of helplessness.

Then, Y/N tried moving her head away from him, sickened at the hot, trembling feeling of desire beginning to throb between her thighs for this murderous beast.

"Oh?," he sat back up to examine her face turning to the side in disgust, tears streaking out of her eyes. He reached out a hand to move away the strands of hair on her face with his nails as he continued in a deep, caressing tone, "You don't like... my touch?"

With his other hand, he tore apart her tank top, exposing her breasts cradled by a lacy bra. He roamed his hands over them, Y/N sharply inhaling as he ripped the bra apart, her breasts swinging free for him to cup possessively. He bent down and suckled one of her nipples, his hot breath and lips making her clitoris swell from the rapidly dampening heat due to Victor squeezing her other breast with his other hand.

"I'll take you either way," Victor announced, his pupils dilating, his lust taking control of him. He tore apart the center of her pants with his claws. He tugged it past her knees and bent his head down towards the spot sheathed by a panty.

"Well, well, well," he murmured, inhaling the scent of her damp tangle of curls, "Seems like you've enjoyed my touch more than I thought, my frail, little mouse."

With that said, he tore away her panties with his fangs.

"No, no, no..." Y/N whimpered out, her stomach churning at the thought of Owen choking on his own blood.

"No?," Victor inquired, envisioning himself thrusting his cock into her hard and fast so that she screamed out, 'Yes! Yes!'.

At that moment, he wanted nothing more than that.

"I didn't keep you alive to hear you say no," he growled out, the reasoning side of him suppressed by the animal within.

Knock knock knock

Victor stilled himself.

Knock knock knock

"Move, and I'll kill you," Victor hissed into Y/N's ear, taking out a rag from his pocket and gagging her with it.

He got off of her and, picking up and shrugging on his coat, answered the door.

Some moments passed, during which Y/N considered getting up to expose herself to the visitor, but before she came to a decision, Victor came back.

"We'll continue what we were doing another time," he informed her, his lips curling upwards and revealing his bared fangs.

He picked her up, threw her onto the bed and quickly tied her arms to the headboard.

"Until tonight, my little mouse," he departed with those words, leaving Y/N tense with anticipation over how many inches of her body would she willingly let him possess.

TO BE CONTINUED.

A/N: I just realized how similar this is to Part One of 'Demon Boy of Neverland'....oops. So I guess you could say that this is the more adult version and the Demon Boy is for adolescents lmao.

Just kidding :)

[beans-shadow]

looking for the truth (pt 6)

Fandom: Naruto

Relationship: Kakasaku

Characters: Hatake Kakashi, Haruno Sakura

read on ao3: here

part one / two / three / four / five / six / seven / eight / nine / ten / eleven / twelve / thirteen

Sakura surmised what Kakashi wanted from her, so after the old shinobi passed out, she gently took his hand, palm up. It was so large compared to hers, so rough and calloused from years of service. It had been through more than she could imagine, and yet she still handled it with the utmost care as if it would break with the slightest pressure.

Taking out a kunai knife, Sakura pressed down on his forefinger, releasing a small flow of dark red. Unfolding the scroll Kakashi had given her, she deftly stained the parchment with Kakashi's blood. Scroll in hand, she recalled the proper hand signs as she walked out of the bedroom. Once in the living space, she whispered, "Summoning jutsu!"

Slapping her hand on the floor, the seal appeared, and with a puff of smoke, Pakkun was sitting on the ground, looking up at Sakura in confusion.

"Will Kakashi not be joining us?"

Turning away, Sakura shook her head. "Not this time," she explained, leaving to grab her tools from a kitchen cabinet. "It's just you, me, and this village at night."

"Sounds like fun. Let's go."

After shedding her usual red blazer for a more night-appropriate outfit, the dog and the ninja set off to investigate the village grounds. Sakura was sure people would question her walking around late at night without her partner, so she decided to stick to the shadows to start off.

Pakkun was content to let her take the lead at first, which both excited and frightened Sakura. She'd never ranked highest on a mission unless it was in the hospital. But she wouldn't let Pakkun down; she wouldn't let Kakashi down.

Her first destination was the palace. Thanks to Kakashi, she knew where the security cameras were placed, and how frail the guard detail was in the royal grounds. Infiltration would be easy, especially with such a minimal group.

Expeditiously, the pair reached the main palace walls. Two guards walked the perimeter here, so Pakkun and Sakura waited in the bushes nearby until their shift was over.

Apparently the dog thought they were out of earshot, since he struck up conversation.

"How has it been working for Kakashi-kun?"

Keeping an eye on the two guards, Sakura responded, "Interesting so far, I suppose. He hasn't changed that much in regards to wanting to work mostly by himself, even if he always preaches about teamwork." A guard sneezed.

"Ah, yes," the dog agreed. "That is one of his faults. He sees the value in sharing, but finds it hard to do so himself." Pakkun scratched the back of his ear. "But he tries."

"I know," Sakura found herself saying, only half-paying attention to the words streaming from her mouth. "I guess I do know that. He did mention he wished he could be here now… but with the circumstances, I thought that unwise."

The dog almost replied back but was withheld with a hand from Sakura. The guards were about to move. She rose from her crouch, and the second the guards turned the corner, she was off. Summoning chakra to her feet, she scaled the vertical wall with ease, leapt over the barrier, and landed without a sound on the other side. Pakkun followed suit a mere second later.

After a quick awareness, Sakura concluded they were near the bathing quarters of the palace. "Come on," she whispered. "Follow me, I know a safe route to the residential area. But let me know if you scent anyone approaching."

The dog woofed back, signaling his understanding.

The darkness of the night blanketed the palace grounds, the small sliver of the moon offering little relief. But the fireworks were scheduled to start soon, so Sakura wasn't concerned about visibility. However with better sight came a higher probability of discovery. A ninja's life was full of win-lose scenarios.

Step by step, Sakura stayed in the shadows, using chakra to muffle her movements. They avoided cameras, guard patterns, and any other resident that was found roaming the area. Eventually they made their way past the dining area, and reached the residential suites.

Perched on a roof, Sakura knelt down next to Pakkun. "This is where I think we would find something, if anything," Sakura claimed. "Here." She removed a piece of cloth from a front pocket. "I took this from Futoshi a little while back, but hopefully some scent will remain. He should be close to the Daimyo's quarters. Want to have a go?"

The dog padded forward and sniffed the fabric. With a nod, he was off.

The path to Futoshi's bedroom was convoluted, as the son seemed to get around. But eventually, they reached a living space that Pakkun was certain was Futoshi's.

"His scent is most concentrated here, it must be where he sleeps. Nothing else would smell like this," Pakkun explained.

"Great. Let's go." Sakura slid down the side of the building, landing just outside of the front entrance.

"Father! The fireworks are going to start any minute!" Futoshi's voice came from inside.

"Calm down, Futoshi," a disgruntled Daimyo said. "I know. Let me just finish writing this… ring for your servant."

The sound of a bell emanated from the room, and Sakura in a rush Pakkun behind a brush, quickly using a jutsu to hide their presence. A tired-looking servant exited a room connected to Futoshi's quarters and walked from across the way to Futoshi's area.

"How may I be of service, my Lord?" The servant asked from the doorway.

"Let's take this outside," the Daimyo responded. Sakura eyed Pakkun who returned the same curious gaze.

The Daimyo exited, looking extravagant as always. But he didn't seem to care about the festivities planned for the night, he was worrying with a scroll in his hands.

"Take this to the perimeter with speed. They'll know what to do. Be back before Futoshi does later tonight." He handed over the small scroll.

The servant bowed, and moved to depart.

"That was weird. One of us should follow," Pakkun noted quietly.

"I agree, but how will we know where or when to meet up?" Sakura asked, feeling antsy. That exchange was definitely something to investigate further, but they couldn't give up a chance to search Futoshi's things on such an opportune night.

"I'll go, and if something is happening, I'll summon you."

"What? You'll summon me?" Sakura broke her concentration of watching the Daimyo to look at the small pug. "You can do that?"

"I may be Kakashi's summon and it may have been Kakashi's blood, but it was your chakra that summoned me earlier. Which gives me one summon myself. A summon for a summon. This is a two-way deal, Sakura," the pug explained. "But I'll lose his scent if I wait any longer. See you soon." The dog shimmied from her arms and scurried after the servant, leaving Sakura alone.

Well, alright, Sakura thought. Maybe that was why Kakashi was always late; he had to come back from wherever his dogs had summoned him randomly. But that didn't seem likely. She hoped her former sensei was doing okay, and not choking on his own vomit. With that mask, it would be hard not to suffocate. Perhaps she should have taken it off, snuck a peak under the guise. It would have been for his own good, so what if she got something out of the deal?...

No. Why was she daydreaming of what Kakashi looked like under his mysterious mask? She needed to focus. He wasn't daydreaming material anyways. Wasn't he like a billion years old? Although he certainly didn't show it. In fact, despite his lazy demeanor, he was much more in shape than other ninjas just becoming chunin now. And then she remembered the soft kiss on her forehead; the way he had clung to her before she left him…

No! Sakura slapped herself to kick out of it.

"Hello?"

Futoshi and Daimyo had descended the steps from Futoshi's room, and the two were looking around for the source of the sound. "Is someone there?" The Daimyo called out.

Shit. Shit shit shit. Sakura fell to the ground, making herself flat. She couldn't be the reason this mission fell apart; she would not be the cause of their cover being blown. Back on Team 7, she never felt useful. She'd always get knocked out quickly, or Sasuke had to rescue her. Well, this time, neither of those things would happen. She'd gained Kakashi's confidence, finally, after years, and she wasn't about to lose it tonight.

"Hello?" Futoshi repeated as the Daimyo started walking around. The footsteps grew closer and closer, until —"Father, I don't think anyone is here. Let's just go."

The father examined his son, stoic as a statue. Crossing his hands in front of his body, he said, "If you wish, son." Sakura shivered at the disapproving tone, but the Daimyo listened to his child and returned by his side. "Let's go enjoy the show."

Sakura waited a few minutes more after she stopped hearing their footfalls, and then pushed up to her own feet.

"Okay, Futoshi. Let's see what you got."

Apparently, it wasn't much.

Even after what felt like half an hour of rummaging through Futoshi's artifacts, Sakura was still coming up short. She'd found a few notes here and there describing preparations for the festival, some lists of diplomat's likes and dislikes, but nothing incriminating.

Mostly, Futoshi's room was littered in doodles.

Drawings of plants, animals and people lined his walls, were crumbled into balls on his desk, and layered in stacks in his drawers. It seemed they had a potential artist in the family, or at least someone who was more interested in that than ruling a Land. Sakura actually felt a little bad for Futoshi. His passion surely was not being received well by his father.

With a last sweep, including using a jutsu designed to reveal any hidden locks, Sakura figured there wasn't much to see here.

She decided she should try her chances at the Daimyo's quarters, even if it was riskier. She scurried around the area until she found a house heavily guarded. There was no sneaking into this area. Should she use genjutsu? No, if they found out alarms would be signaled. That was too risky. Maybe...

Sakura used a few hand signs. "Transformation jutsu!"

With a poof, she changed into a chambermaid, arms full of new sheets. She walked around, until she discovered a sleeping quarters about twice the size of Futoshi's, with three times the number of guards. Mustering up confidence, she trotted up the steps, not paying any attention to the soldiers.

Just as her foot hovered above the first set of stairs, a guard caught her shoulder. "Halt! Who are you, and what do you want?"

Acting as if the man was a complete idiot (it wasn't hard, she just pretended he was Naruto), Sakura cocked an eyebrow. "Isn't it obvious? I need to change the Lord's bedding."

The guard looked disturbed, catching the eye of a fellow guard. "Didn't he already get his room cleaned earlier today?"

Now, Sakura huffed. "He likes them changed twice a day, of course. You know how he is. Now, if you are refusing me, who do I talk to to let the Daimyo know his personal guard is responsible for his sleeping in dirty sheets tonight?"

Immediately the guard paled and backed away, signaling the okay to the others. "No one, no one, miss. Please, go in."

Bowing in thanks, Sakura continued.

In complete contrast to Futoshi's room, the Daimyo's was spotless. Sakura wasn't too far off in her ruse in claiming the Daimyo liked things clean; no wonder her act had worked so well. In fact, it seemed he hardly kept any personal affairs besides a single photograph of his family while his wife was still alive.

There was no way Sakura doubted her shishou, but perhaps the Land of Mountain Streams really wasn't planning anything nefarious.

And then Sakura felt her whole body lurch.

She thought her diaphragm stopped working, and her world went white. She tried to chakra scan herself, but her hands weren't responding; now she couldn't think, she couldn't breathe, she couldn't—

"Oof!"

With a hard thud, Sakura landed flat on the ground. Her face planted into some mud, splattering across her hair.

But she could breathe.

Reaching out, she clutched grass under her hands, and let out a sigh of relief.

"Yeah, it takes a little getting used to."

Angling her head awkwardly, Sakura saw Pakkun sitting right in front of her on his hind legs, looking down a bit smugly. "Once you've gone through the process a few times, you get more elegant at landing on your feet."

"That's what being summoned feels like?" Sakura grumbled. The dog nodded.

"Now, get up on your feet, I found something interesting." In the process of getting onto his own feet, Pakkun kicked more mud onto Sakura's face. With a violent exhale, Sakura hefted herself up and scurried after the swift dog. As she caught up with him, she took the time to gather her surroundings. It seemed they were now beyond the outer walls of the village, near the fields that supplied the people with food.

Pakkun took the trees, and Sakura summoned chakra to her feet for silent climbing. As the fireworks cackled above them, workers in the paddies continued the farming dutifully. Sakura knew people needed to eat, even during times of celebration, but why were there so many? Especially this late at night? It didn't seem right.

A few minutes into the journey through the trees, Pakkun stopped where they had a good view of a particularly odd patch of workers. He nodded his head to the people below. "Look down there. What do you see them planting?"

Narrowing her eyes, Sakura tried to determine what the men and women on the ground were doing. But even with the flashes of light the fireworks offered, she couldn't make out anything.

She shook her head. "No clue."

Pakkun growled. "Well, I can't see, but I can smell it. It's certainly not anything edible, nor something meant to be eaten. Why waste resources?"

Crouching on the branch, Sakura agreed. "Especially in a village so small, they don't have a huge availability of land to cultivate. I'm going to get closer."

"Sakura, no—"

But before Pakkun could finish his objection, Sakura hopped down from the security of the branch. Passed the tree line, there was no cover. Regardless, Sakura treaded away from her partner.

Diligent as always, no one noticed a black blob move slowly from the bushes.

She moved just a few feet away, trying to get closer to the hoed fields. The patch next to her was already sprouting, but nothing was identifiable about the plant.

"Did you see this?"

Sakura stilled as a worker about twenty yards away walked up to a fellow farmer, something in his hand.

"New instructions. We need to try and harvest more quickly."

The man receiving the orders bristled, slapping his gloves together to remove dirt. "How? We are growing as fast as we can." He tore open the scroll, reading it quickly.

The messenger shrugged. "The details are in here, I guess. Take a look for yourself. But my wife is waiting at home, and I'd like to enjoy the fireworks with my family, even if it's just for a little bit."

In a hurry, Sakura retreated back into the trees just before the man started walking towards her, pulling off his dirtied overshirt and removing his gloves. Pakkun soon arrived next to her.

"Well? Learn anything?"

Sakura held up a finger. "Wait here just a second." She kept an eye on the worker who received the scroll, who upon finishing up readint the message let out an annoyed growl. Rolling it back haphazardly, he shoved it into his back pocket, exposing the scroll to the world.

Perfect.

Not letting her eyes leave the disgruntled worker, Sakura climbed down the trees once more, crawling from her hiding place. Bit by bit, she tiptoed closer and closer to the worker, who had resumed planting more seeds in an aggravated manner. She closed the distance between her and the worker, who bent at his waist, displaying his butt in the air.

Just… a little more… Sakura stretched out her hand as far as it could go. Her fingers brushed the top of the scroll��� yes! She grasped it.

"Huh?"

The man turned around to see nothing. Scratching the back of his head, he went back to work.

Sakura panted on the branch, back to the trunk. Pakkun crawled onto her legs, shaking his head. "That was too close."

Smiling through her inhales, Sakura laughed. "Don't underestimate the speed at which I can use the flicker technique, Pakkun. But here, now we have this." She opened the scroll so both of them could see it.

It meant nothing to Sakura. The lines made sounds, syllables were strung together, but it didn't have any meaning.

"It's encoded," Pakkun voiced what both had assumed.

Trying to contain her disappointment, Sakura moved Pakkun from her legs. "Then we'll just have to try and decipher it." Brushing off her boots, she stood up. "For now, I think we've done enough. I should get back to Kakashi and make sure he didn't die."

"I'll go back with you. You fancy a walk under a nice fireworks display?"

"Sure," Sakura smiled down at the dog. The two took off through the trees.

Turns out, the main square of the village was were everyone went to view the fireworks, so Pakkun and Sakura had the entire streets to their own. Feeling free, the dog talked without reservation.

"...and then he threw Gai into the river, complaining how he should know better then to borrow one of his Itcha Itcha without asking!"

Sakura held back a loud chortle, clutching at her stomach. "I knew Kakashi was crazy about his disgusting books, but really?! Poor Gai Sensei!"

"I know, I know. He felt bad afterwards, and let Gai win the next three challenges," Pakkun admitted with a laugh.

The two fell into amicable silence, walking side by side. Sakura shifted the scroll in his hands, considering her next words carefully. She knew how loyal dogs could be from hanging out with Kiba. And these ninken were bonded to Kakashi on a whole different level. But she could still try. So, timidly, she asked, "Kakashi says I know him better than most… but I still wonder a lot about him."

The soft click of Pakkun's nails on the cobblestone slowed down. "There is a lot to wonder about," the dog agreed. "Young Hatake has had a hard life, and is not quick to share his struggles." He paused, taking in Sakura. She looked at the scroll, but her mind was distant.

Perhaps Kakashi would not approve of certain boundaries to be overstepped, but the dog didn't fear any repercussions. He took care of Kakashi as if he were his own pup after Sakumo passed away. How was this any different?

After taking a deep inhale, the dog captured Sakura's attention. "But he wasn't talking about knowing him in the past, he was talking about how you know him now." Sakura's eyes widened. "You've absorbed his tendencies, balanced out his flaws. In time, you will also understand his past." I would bet Bull's collar on it, the dog thought.

The pink-haired ninja nodded, determination and excitement that flashing behind her emerald eyes that gave the dog validation for revealing insight of his master. "I hope so. But is there anything you can offer me? Just a little bone, perhaps?

Pakkun almost-smiled at the pun. But what he said did not offer any joy. "All I can say is that Kakashi has lost almost everyone, and now is very careful letting anyone else in. His hard demeanor isn't a way to push people away, it is a way to protect his own heart. Reticence came as a necessity, not a choice."

Sakura pulled the scroll closer to her chest, following behind step of her companion. "Oh. That's awful."

"Indeed," the dog agreed, taking the lead just as they arrived at their motel. Turning his head, he looked back at Sakura with a warm gaze. "But I'm hopeful his future will not be as gloomy."

Leaving Sakura without further explanation, he pawed open the door and went to find Kakashi.

Kakashi woke up with a hangover. That had never happened before.

It took many minutes for Kakashi to pry his eyes open, and even more for them to focus on anything in the room. His head pounded, his mind was blurry, and he was utterly and completely embarrassed. Last night seemed like a distant memory of an unworthy breakfast; he remembered that he'd eaten, he remembered where he'd eaten, but he couldn't remember how the breakfast felt upon being eaten.

Maybe it wasn't the best analogy. Give him a break, he was exhausted.

Grousing, Kakashi sat up in bed, covering his mouth when some bile rose in his throat. His heart froze. He patted at his face, then relaxed with a sigh. His mask was still in place.

Blowing onto his hand, Kakashi sniffed his palm.

"Ugh!" He twisted away, disgusted at his own breath. Shuffling out of bed, he stumbled into the bathroom. The mirror unveiled what a mess he looked like: his gray hair stuck up about a foot into the air, his eyes were puffy, and his mask, although up just as his physical examination concluded, was wonky.

With a groan, Kakashi pushed the sink handle, which spouted water much more loudly than was necessary. He pulled down his mask and started brushing his teeth.

The man in the mirror gave him a deplorable look, two gray eyes marked with resentment and regret. How could he have allowed this? He'd gone too far, gotten too comfortable with Sakura. At a time like this, it put the entire mission at jeopardy.

Not anymore. Once they were back at the village, he could act normal. But for now…

Grasping at both sides of the sink, Kakashi spit in resolution. He looked up, eyes narrowed.

He pulled up his mask. For now, he'd retreat. Back into himself, back to who he was before.

For the sake of the mission.

Right?

There was a rustle at the door, and Kakashi's nerves spiked. Not caring to check his physical status, he ran to the living room, hands together prepared for the worst.

The handle turned, and Kakashi breathed in, readying his chakra. "Does this mean that Katsuyu can summon me whenever she wants?" He heard through the wood as the door turned.

Letting out a sigh of relief, Kakashi slumped. Pakkun walked through the small crack first, looking back at Sakura. "I guess so." The dog then noticed Kakashi, eyes widening. Kakashi quickly fixed himself up, standing strong when Sakura walked in.

"Ugh, so gross… snails…" she didn't realize Kakashi was waiting for her as she turned to close the door. Removing her gloves, she shivered. "Well, let's go check on our sleepy man, shall we?"

"That won't be necessary," Kakashi announced. With a yelp, Sakura jumped around. There Kakashi stood, hands tucked into his pockets with his eyes lidded as usual.

She clapped and rushed to his side. "Kakashi! You're awake! It hasn't been that long. Are you okay?" She inspected his eyes, and outright stood on her tiptoes to smell his breath.

Daintily, Kakashi pushed her away with one finger on her forehead seal. "I'm quite alright."

"Okay," Sakura said, dubious. Pulling a scroll from a pocket, Sakura waved it front of his face. "There is so much to tell you! I think we might have a lead!"

Her disclosure did not surprise Kakashi, despite the fact a burst of pride filled his chest. But he kept his face serene, trying to hold himself together. Back to his blasé ways, he said, "Alright. Let's go over what you know."

Half-dismissing her, he walked to the small table in the kitchen and sat down unceremoniously. Sakura paused, trying to evaluate how to respond. Shaking her head, she joined him across the table.

In just a few minutes, she recounted everything she found, including the Daimyo's odd interaction with his son and the messenger and the events that transpired outside the confines of the village.

"But the scroll was decoded when I opened it," she explained, now removing it from its protected container. With a swing of her hand, it unwinds across the table. The familiar-looking, but unrecognizable lettering balked at her once more.

Kakashi leaned forward, hand on his chin. "Hmm. Good work. I'm glad it wasn't too much to handle."

He felt Sakura bristle at the small jibe, but she quickly let it go. "So can you decode?" She asked instead.

Closing his eye and reclining in his chair, Kakashi shrugged. "Of course. I was in ANBU, after all. We only communicated in code."

"You were in ANBU?" Sakura asked.

"So let's see what we have here…" Kakashi picked up the scroll, holding it close. He almost tried summoning chakra to his Sharingan, but caught himself before the mistake.

They spent the rest of the night looking over the scroll. Sakura tried to offer input, but this was far away from her area of expertise. Kakashi had much more experience with this subject, leaving Sakura to kick back in her chair and watch Kakashi at work.

Hours passed with the two of them across the table from one another. Kakashi covered the scroll with his upper body, elbows perched to hold himself up as he stared at the scroll. Sakura rested her head on the table top. "Do you remember the day Team Kakashi was made? After Naruto and I snagged your dumb bells?" She picked at the wood, flicking a splinter into the air.

"You mean when you lied to me, claiming to know the end of my novel?" Kakashi responded, not taking his eyes off of the scroll.

Eyes squinting, Sakura frowned. "There are no rules in the bell test. Besides, don't try to change the subject. Do you remember what you said?" She sat up in her chair attempting to command Kakashi's attention, but the man remained fixed to the scroll, finger grazing the letterings as he put a few more words together. Sakura plowed on. "You said the days of sensei and student are past. That we were now all leaf shinobi, on equal ground."

Now Kakashi paused his movement, eyes flickering up to Sakura. "What about that?"

She stared into his soul, piercing his exterior. Those emerald eyes might as well have been a new type of dojutsu. Kakashi felt as though she could see everything: his insecurity, his shame, his shunted protection. It took all of his strength not to waver.

"That's still true, right?"

Meticulously, Kakashi assayed Sakura, looking her up and down in that chair. She leaned over the table, both arms holding all of her weight lacking any pusillanimousness she once possessed as a genin. She'd done amazing tonight, gathering good intel and finding quite a promising lead. With complete certainty, Kakashi answered, "Now more than ever."

Those eyes widened, exposing Kakashi to more of her beauty, and before he got lost he retreated to his scroll, clearing his throat to regain his concentration.

Sakura believed Kakashi meant what he said, but she felt something change from before. Heading Pakkun's advice, she tried to pry into the man across the table, peeling back his layers of solitude. But every inquiry ended with a short answer, disallowing any follow up. She tried to remind herself what Pakkun said, that Kakashi is defensive out of protection, not disregard for other's feelings.

But it couldn't help but feel personal. She thought she had reached something within him, just as he fell asleep in front of her mere hours ago.

Eventually she gave up, falling asleep at the chair with Pakkun in her lap.

Kakashi watched her after she fell into a deep slumber. He could tell she was trying to gauge his actions, his responses. She was digging rather obviously. He was right; he'd gotten too open with her. And while he wanted to get closer, that wasn't what the mission was about. After the mission, he told himself. After the mission, everything will be fine.

His gaze fell on Pakkun, who sat curled up in her lap, a content smile on the small pug's face. Pakkun never sought out human contact, but obviously Sakura had done something to earn the little dog's love. Although so much older now, Sakura regained her youth in her sleep. Her hard lines from the battlefield disappeared, and she looked like the innocent girl Kakashi taught all of those years ago. But underneath, she was powerful, resolute, and strong. She was truly an amazing woman.

Pakkun looked so peaceful, head resting on Sakura's arm, face squished up against her pale skin. What Kakashi wouldn't give for that to be him, to be able to freely touch Sakura…

Wait, was he really jealous of a dog?

Anger made Kakashi stare back down at the scroll. He'd only gotten a few letters unscrambled. He had a lot of work to do.

author's note: sorry for the long wait, i was trying to do Sakura's POV justice. Hope it's good! And thanks for all of the reviews, it means a lot :)

[ajw720]

I love that D is so "private" that he'll tell a stan, who he knows is livetweeting/streaming everything, his opinion on the "haters". M, who also knows she's recording everything, will talk about her wedding plans/location in front of her and they just happen to kiss while the camera of said stan is pointed at them. Gee, it's almost like their taking advantage of the stan's constant presence to sell their narrative. Soon the paid ads will just come up on the stan's feed;)

This exactly anon, isn’t it convenient that ALL of the gossip form that bar is almost entirely from ONE source, a person that loves to kiss M’s ass and who has made it her life goal to spread m/iarren propaganda (this will never get old).  

Truly, If D was sincerely talking to a fan about his other fans and mocking us, he is an ass (which is precisely the image they paint of him constantly in her presence). 

but we know that is not  the case. First we question real vs, fake news. I lean fake or very embellished, but not video evidence so we do not know.

But again, even if real, he is a caged animal and every word said to that source serves a purpose. They know EXACTLY who she is, they know she tweets every word, gesture, and action, and they know she will do the needful and spread whatever BS she hears or alternatively is asked to spread.

and M’s agenda is to make us HATE d.  This will end. She ain’t got shit to show for it (and the bar is already not doing well, remove d and it will fail spectacularly as he is the ONLY draw to that place).  

D on the other hand has a promising and full career ahead. She would love to take him down and she despises our fandom as we are the reason people question their relationship. So why not try to force D into a situation where he has no other choice but to join in or alternatively conspire with the stan to say D was present in the convo and an active participant.

On the kiss, do you know my initial reaction was to actually laugh loudly?  It could not have been MORE FORCED OR MORE STAGED.  With M doing 100% of the work. He stood there, kissed her as he had no choice, literally, no choice, and walked away and did not even look back.  

Now, I quickly adjusted my attitude because then i remember there is not one funny thing about the situation. NO ONE should ever be forced to engage in any physical contact without consent. and he essentially was (watch how she hooks her arm around his neck and brings him in). But what i found good about the tweeter catching it on film (and again M KNOWS she is being filmed she looks right a the stan), it shows how these interactions happen time and again. We have heard from the same stan that she has witnessed some type of PDA previously (but always failed to capture it on film).  Real or Fake?  Who knows. But know we have video evidence of how these interactions happen.  Again, just like in pics with too much PDA or touching, it is all M.

So agreed on the source. But the stans buy every word.

[wispy-selfship-eden]

Youtuber AU (Harem)

Welp, this is based off of my future dream of ‘if i ever got more involved in YouTube’ XD I hope everyone enjoys! because I just think I’d be casual with YouTube, you know? but anyways, here we go!

>> This AU would start if I had proper equipment and time, and would be alive since middle school. It was mostly to privately post shitposts and videos of my friends and the things I do to them that make me annoying X’D.

         - I filmed secretly in school. If i wanted to do it out in the open, it’s always with the teacher’s permission. Either that or it’s the perfect place for posting school project related stuff :D

>> After graduating 8th Grade, the Youtube channel was dead for two years since I got preoccupied with starting High School ^^;; During the time, I eventually forgot it existed.

☆ That’s when until near the end of Sophomore year, while allowing myself to suffer under schoolwork, my love for anime and whatnot motivated me to create a channel! And that’s when I found and polished my old channel and privately stored away the middle school videos; renewing it!

☆ My official Youtuber name becomes “[}| AniMania |{]” (The emoticons will come in later on)

☆ @lovesick-au-lait would be one of my greatest friends and eventually become my Youtube partner :D She also runs her own really nice channel where she posts Speed drawings/paintings of her art <3

☆ Most of my content is related to anime, manga, and franchises I’m into ^^ I do skits, fandubs (of comics, specific anime scenes, or even fanfiction readings XD), and various discussions on the things I love. Very rarely do I do a vlog tho uwu; Showing my real self is, at first, uncomfortable.

And now, we move on to my bois~ <3

Izuku Midoriya:

🍀 Izuku tries to post a video biweekly. Other than that, it’s not as much impulsively.

🍀 He mostly focuses on analyzing heroic figures! Not just from Marvel or DC or other fandoms, but also in real life as well! It’s incredible how in depth he does his research and how he doesn’t leave out other opinions.

🍀 Other videos consist of training videos, or training how to do certain moves because HE BUFF A F LIKE LOOK AT HIM. *insert eyes emoji here*

🍀 Sometimes Finnian (Black Butler) shows himself in videos as he’s Izuku’s ‘assistant’ in moving props around c:

🍀 He collaborates with me not only because he’s a sweetheart but his vice is so soothing and cute it makes the female viewers giddy.

🍀 We both met up when he was still in middle school. I supported him all the way in helping him grow and push forward.

Yoosung Kim:

🐶 He’s become one of the most prominent gamers on Youtube. Sure he doesn’t post as frequently due to his up and coming job as a Veterinarian, but he still makes his videos worth it.

🐶 He often collaborates with Soujiro’s channel, especially when playing either LOLOL or Elder Tale (he still would rather play the former)

🐶 Of course, his content is mostly gaming! Especially MMORPGs (they take your soul, but the pain is so g o o d and irresistible.) However, he is up for trying new kinds of games and different genres :D

🐶 I sometimes game with him too! But seriously, there are compilation videos of him when he’s gaming. From ‘hilariously silly’ to ‘hilariously raging’. Sometimes, there is no in-between.

🐶 Since we share the most hobbies with each other, he is a guest star in my videos the most! Especially since he’s such a cutesy guy, like a k-pop star sometimes.

🐶 We met when  began rebooting my channel. Because I reached a subscriber milestone, I was going to buy an actual RPGMaker program and I bumped into Yoosung. (My boy--why are you outside at flipping 6 AM in the morning?? ??)

Soujiro Seta:

⚔️ He is also a fellow Youtube gamer, mostly focusing on Elder Tale, along with playing with Yoosung, Shiroe, and Naotsugu! He does play other MMORPGs but it’s just not the same ^^

⚔️ I have a headcanon since he’s a samurai in Elder Tale, maybe he has potential talent to handle real samurai swords in real life? Like how to polish them, sharpen them, and how to wield them? It’s pretty epic. He’s called the ‘real-life samurai’ through his journey in indulging himself in that C: <3

⚔️ Other than that, he also co-hosts on my channel since he barely posts anything else on his own ^^;

⚔️ He works in my skits very frequently XD Because he’s like a shoujo manga protagonist, at the very least a character from any shoujo thing lol

⚔️ He is actually my comment patrol. After a day or two of posting a video, he checks on the comments I get. let’s just say... sometimes they’re not so good for the other people. :p

Isami and Takumi Aldini:

🍝 Uh they run a cooking channel c: It’s pretty obvious since they attended Totsuki Academy. I’ll just say after the whole rebellion Arc in the manga, graduating came and was almost smooth sailing. They decided to help out at Chef Shinomiya’s at one of the branches in America for the next few years!

🍝 Of course most of their videos are Italian dishes, but with their creative, experimental minds, they make the crappy foods of America they hear about, make it gourmet and healthier, and just much more appealing.

- They helped saved lives o__o Seriously.

🍝  They’re the most popular cooking channel because not only do they live up to their credentials, they’re also flipping handsome and charming (but with the viewers, that applies to just Takumi sometimes).

🍝 I first met them after I was inspired to attempt to cook a dish they’ve already made for my channel milestone! Me and @lovesick-au-lait uhhh... let’s just say survived and the food was edible ^^; Then, i decided to try and cook for something for dinner, and Isami, and eventually Takumi as well, bumped into me when I was trying to look for a good box of pasta.

🍝 Now they sometimes invite me onto their channel to be their taste tester! Our banter knows no bounds.

Finnian:

🎍 Finnian doesn’t have a channel, but he loves to assist with props and preparations!

🎍 He definitely loves being the camera man ^^; though we had a few incidents where he’d break a few (or break things during videos pfft)

🎍 He’s a part of skits and the occasional comic dub because he’s so cute!! He tends to play the best friend role, but then again he’s the best friend that gets some ;D

🎍 There are actually compilation videos of him and his screw ups on camers XD just all of his hilarious moments in general, adding on by the year.

🎍 For the sake of having a more enthralling American experience, he’s my roommate in the house as a condition a part of the study abroad contract.

Armin Arlert, Peter Parker, and Death the Kid:

📑 A very unlikely trio! They run a channel together c: Sure it has its occasional setbacks and whatnot, but in the end, they make things work.

📑 Strict video uploading times; never misses the mark on its precise hour and day. You can think Death the Kid for that ^^;

📑 They run an educational channel ^^ But almost all facts or things you’ve never once thought to be well-informed about, they bring it to the table and make it so intriguing! It certainly is better than the school textbook sometimes c:

📑 Armin and Peter definitely handle the science and mathematical aspects. Death the Kid can do the same when the two aren’t available, but he focuses on History and Literature and the other Arts. Classy.

📑 And of course they take part in my channel too! But they also help me out with vlogs!

💗 Milestones are definitely switched up, one idea for every occasion! It has all of my lovely boys (or however many can show up) being there behind my camera too!

💗 Live streams are sometimes a hilarious mess. Especially some of the comments I’d get, usually pertaining to flattering me or one of my lovely men. Let’s just say, many blunt objects had to be put away to reisst temptation of irreversible consequences lol

💗 Going to cons is also an adventure! But hey with our own expertise areas, it definitely is worth the experience.

💗 It was actually difficult coming together to form a romantic cohort only we could pull off. But with  the help of other youtubers @shiroe-is-my-baby and @self-shipping-angel, it all works out when we’re able to reveal ourselves, with pride c:

💗 Then our videos become popular for another reason: for the multitude of shipping moments.

💗 Youtube has never been this fun and I would want to continue with them for as long as it does!

[transamorousnetwork]

How Following Happy Impulses Creates A Happy New Life

I created an awesome blessing last night (at the time of writing this). I listened to my inner guidance coming from my positive stories and discovered joy at the end of that journey. It was the most clear demonstration of what we say is possible at The Transamorous Network.

We say stories create reality and any story told often enough will create reality consistent with it. In addition to telling the story though, the story teller must also tune into impulses they receive, then act on them.

What do those impulses sound like? It depends on the listener.

How does one hear them? That question carries more weight than the former.

A client answered that second question during his Client sessionrecently. He did so using a colorful analogy:

“In New Mexico, where I’m from,” he began. “We have massive hot air balloon festivals. Huge balloons of all shapes and sizes and colors fill the sky.”

Apparently these brightly colored rubber sacks come shaped like stage coaches, animals, houses and more. These festivals draw such balloons from miles around.

“When these balloons start out they stand where they are, in New Mexico,” my client said. “As they rise, they go straight up into the air, but they’re still in New Mexico.”

^^Some crazy balloons that show up at these festivals.

The stream carries them to their dream

But then they hit the air stream high above the ground, he said. The air stream carries each balloon on journeys fulfilling their purpose. The balloonists have a general idea where they’re going, but little control. My client made the connection:

“I see when I raise my perspective through telling positive stories, I feel better about where I am. My spirit rises, I connect with my Inner Being stream and my Inner Being stream carries me to the next wonderful place. Just like balloons get carried by the airstream.”

“I don’t know what that journey looks like,” He added. “But I do know the view will be beautiful, the journey joyful and when I land, I won’t be in New Mexico anymore.”

I loved this beautiful analogy comparing tuning into Inner Being awarensss to hot air balloons merging with Earth’s invisible airstreams. Those airstreams represent hearing one’s impulses.

Hearing them requires elevating my awareness to that of my impulse communication. The impulses exist. My job: elevating myself so I tune in.

For my clients and I, tuning in means telling positive stories about everything.

These days, tuning takes priority, over income, jobs and relationships. No kidding. My marriage ended because I prioritized my relationship with turning in over my wife, for example.

Most won’t do that. Which is why I’m having the life I’m having. Most don’t get everything they want comes through one relationship only: the one between bodily existence and one’s eternal, nonphysical existence. Human relationships give relatively little in comparison.

Anyway, these days, I’m so tuned in I hear impulses constantly. But just because I hear them, doesn’t mean I follow them… 🤷🏽‍♂️

Which is what prompted this post

Last night (at the time of writing this) I finished engaging in my wonderful daytime passions, creating content and leading my team at Copiosis, Creating video content for Positively Focused , and creating films and illustrations for Positively Focused. It was a glorious day I intended ending by watching something on Netflix.

^^Catching God's voice means tuning into God's stream of consciousness. Just like balloons rising to Earth's air streams. (Photo by Aditya Vyas on Unsplash)

But I had a feeling something more wanted my focus, something more thrilling, more satisfying. So there I sat on my couch scrolling through Netflix, when I felt pressure to look over at my desk. My desk sits configured for content creation. On it sits a camera, stand and computer all ready to go.

One thing I created with this rig is a Positively Focused short film called Life is More Than Meets The Eye. Earlier in the week, through another impulse, I figured out how to turn my voice into the female voice I wanted narrating this short film. Other impulses diverted me, but now, I felt compelled to resume post production.

But I also wanted to watch something on Netflix!

I felt pressure in both directions, both I knew led to something good. I even sat there a good ten minutes feeling out both options. Heck, I even said out loud “I have mixed energy, I want to watch Netflix, but I also want to work on my short film.”

My impulses don’t tell me what to do. I am a free, eternal being after all. But they do clarify which path offers the most fulfillment. Any path leads to fulfillment eventually, so choosing is never a problem.

But some choices offer more fulfillment than others.

A Netflix fail leads to better

I decided I’d watch Netflix. I started a movie featuring Michael Peña called “Extinction”. It started ok, but the longer into it, the worse I felt. I still felt the “pull” of my film work. The impulse told me something more stood available over at my desk!

^^My desk configured for content creation.

But determination to finish this movie compelled me while at the same time the film’s poor story line left me increasingly unsatisfied. Then one twist that caught my attention. From there, slight interest surfaced, but God’s voice kept urging me to my desk.

Finally, the movie ended. I surrendered, headed over to my desk and opened my editing software. The moment I engaged with my short film project, I felt something remarkable.

A HUGE energy surge welled up within me. I got totally immersed in my project. So much so I worked, and worked and worked! It was crazy!

The movie was 90 minutes long. Two hours after first sitting at my desk, I still wanted to continue. Only now, my Inner Being was sending different pressure: GO TO BED the feeling said. 😂 That message grew in intensity as 11:30 pm rolled around.

I give a name to moments like this. When I don’t heed the call of my Inner Being, but then go after a while, I call that going “kicking and screaming” toward where impulses want me to go. I want to go, but for whatever reason – stubbornness, inertia, or just laziness – I don’t.

Then, eventually I do.

In both instances that evening, finally surrendering showed me how profoundly satisfying following my impulses feels: When I woke the next morning, dreams and the ecstasy I felt from being in dream scape convinced me following impulses is always a good idea.

When doing it wrong creates right

I know now following that impulse ASAP is important. In many cases, when I get an impulse, acting immediately is crucial. That’s because, in those times, I’m the last of many “cooperative components” converging on a coordinate in time and space. Take too long and I arrive late to the rendezvous and miss the delightful surprise.

Tonight responding quick wasn’t so crucial. My film wasn’t going anywhere. My bed wasn’t either. But both proved excellent clarifying experiences. Through them I understood, with unmistakeable clarity, several lessons:

I can’t get it wrong. Fulfillment is available whatever I do, but some of what I choose contains more fulfillment than others.

Universe got my back. My Inner Being always leads me to what I want. I need to make sure though that I’m tuned into it and not something else, such as a belief that’s contrary to what my Inner Being knows.

The more I’m tuned in, the easier it is to hear impulses next time. Knowing what tuned in feels like opens doors to more of that feeling.

My passions, in this case expressing my art and my fascination with dreams, offer more satisfaction and joy than any other pursuit. Passions always contain delight. Other activities – maybe, maybe not. Certainly not as potent as my passions.

There’s still joy in watching Netflix. Apple TV too. Streaming services offer so much compelling entertainment. I know I can choose either path and find fun.

But it’s guaranteed fun will show up when I follow impulse guidance. So I make sure I do that more these days. And sooner than later.

[aion-rsa]

New Pokemon Snap Successfully Modernizes the Classic N64 Formula

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

New Pokémon Snap takes one of the oldest, most bizarre, yet surprisingly brilliant offshoots of the Pokémon franchise and updates it for the current generation, 22 years after the launch of the original game back in 1999 on the N64. It’s a polished update to the original formula that deepens and expands the experience in many ways while preserving the core idea that made the first game so brilliant in the first place. Developers Bandai Namco did a fantastic job here, and for fans of the original like me, it’s a treat to head back out into the wild, camera in hand.

The key to both the original and New Pokémon Snap’s success is the on-rails gameplay, which ironically opens up a litany of creative avenues for the developers to riff on. You sit in a roving pod called the Neo One, which pilots you down a (mostly) predetermined route through a lush environment while you try to take aesthetically pleasing photographs of Pokémon in their natural habitat.

Photos are scored at the end of each expedition by several criteria, including how centered the Pokémon is in the frame, how large they are in the frame, the direction they’re facing, etc. Racking up big scores gives you points toward the “research level” of that specific environment, which gives you a reason to return to areas you’ve already played. Every time an environment’s research level increases, the expedition changes in different ways, with the Pokémon’s behaviors, positioning, and movement paths changing, giving you new opportunities for better photos.

As you do more research across the Lental region’s different biomes, you’ll receive new items to use in the field to draw out Pokémon and elicit reactions. Fluffruit can be thrown to get a Pokémon’s attention and capture photos of them enjoying a tasty snack. There’s the scanner, which analyzes anomalies and uncovers alternate roots, and also has the bonus effect of attracting the attention of certain Pokémon when activated. And then there are Illumina Balls, which cause Pokémon to glow and can change their behavior on occasion, and a little song you can play, which wakes sleeping Pokémon and causes others to dance.

The main objective of the game is to fill up your Photodex—each Pokémon has four star-ranked poses to capture, and it’s challenging to figure out how to elicit all four poses from each species. It becomes a bit of a puzzle game of sorts as you try to capture your perfect Pokémon pics. Because your movement is restricted, you’re forced to bring the Pokémon in close and influence their behavior by using a variety of items and tools. Being that the Neo One moves ever forward, you’ve only got a few moments to make your moves and position the Pokémon where you need them to be for your snaps.

Watching the Pokémon move around the environments, interact with each other, and essentially do what they do in their natural environments is incredibly entertaining to watch, particularly on your first few runs through a level. Whether it’s two Charmander chatting with each other across a magma river, a family of Onix catching some Z’s under the night sky, or a Magikarp awkwardly flailing in the air, lunging at a thrown Fluffruit, the animations and scripted scenarios look fantastic. 

The artists and engineers at Bandai Namco nail the presentation, and all of the levels are absolutely teeming with life, which adds to the sense of immersion. Cruising through the reefs and beaches of the oceanic levels is wonderfully serene, and the roiling lava streams and rising embers of the volcanic areas are a sight to behold. The environments can stale a bit on multiple playthroughs, but there are day and night variations of most levels, and raising the research levels adds variety as well.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

Overall, the game looks pretty slick, with relatively well-detailed character models and environments that pop with color and personality. The game would’ve likely benefited from a more robust lighting system (there are some environments, like the misty forests, that would look absolutely spectacular with more atmospheric and dynamic effects), but the visuals are eye-catching all the same. Some of the larger Pokémon are downright majestic to behold when you get up close, and to that point, the sense of scale is something that the mainline games are sorely missing.

The sound design is solid, too—you can hear Pokémon outside of your field of vision, which comes in handy if you’re an active listener. It’s still a wonder why a company as profitable as Nintendo can’t afford to provide full voice acting in a game like this, which isn’t exactly brimming with dialogue in the first place. But still, the human characters at the lab provide a nice break from all the cacophony of Pokémon sounds you’ll hear on your excursions.

The story is thin but cute and totally appropriate: You’re a research assistant for Dr. Mirror in the Lental region, where you’re gathering photographic data on not just different Pokémon species, but a phenomena called “illumina,” which involves mysterious flowers that cause Pokémon to glow and alters their behavior. If nothing else, the human cast of characters’ excitement toward the Pokémon and your pictures adds to the fun and reminds you how cool it is to see the cute critters and towering beasts so close-up.

For fans of the franchise, New Pokémon Snap should be a delight to play, if for no other reason than it’s a ton of fun to see the Pokémon up close and personal, interacting with each other in adorable, hilarious ways. But there are also achievements to collect, the Photodex to fill in and read, and a photo album that you can customize and share with others online. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the game’s community thrive for a very, very long time.

There’s really no other game quite like New Pokémon Snap. It’s a nature-photography arcade game whose gameplay feels pure and simple and yet is wholly unique at the same time. There’s maybe no better way to immerse yourself in the wild world of Pokémon—the lovable creatures have never looked so good. And the game is damn fun to play, to boot. In fact, when you take the battling and stats of the main games out of the equation, the true beauty of Pokémon shines through—these characters are cute as hell, and all we want to do is admire how gloriously awesome they are.

The post New Pokemon Snap Successfully Modernizes the Classic N64 Formula appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3eGyZiC

[saintsnsinnersbdb]

Shadow Of Blood: Blood Oath (Part 2)

Written by @My_Own_Male

https://www.twitlonger.com/show/n_1sridam

***** TRIGGER WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT *****

My hand shakes as I reach for the bottle of Jameson’s. Another nightmare had torn me from the little sleep I managed to get during the day. Nightmares of Marisol’s death.

Finally managing to pour three fingers of the 18-year-old whiskey into a tumbler, I raise it with trembling hand to my lips as I sit on the edge of the bed. The dreams had become so frequent I had taken to leaving the bottle in my bedside table. The first gulp burns its way into my stomach. Not the languorous burn a sip would of the fine liquor would give me, but an explosion of fire that steadies my hands even if does nothing for my head. Truly, it is a sin to swill this liquor as I am, but I cannot help it. Though I had bought it for sipping as I perused my business ledgers, now it seems the only thing that settles me after the horrors of the day Marisol died tumble through my brain when I am awakened thus.

I cannot forget her eyes as she looked into the camera, knowing I could not get to her in time. Frightened, defiant, and over all else, forgiving. She loved me, and she forgave me as I cannot forgive myself.

My thoughts roam back to the day she had been taken from me a week ago, playing it through my head, dissecting it again.

I had warned Marisol and Mrs. Carvalho against leaving the house unattended by either myself, Ehric or Evale. I did not even trust Markus with their care. Not because he is untrustworthy, but because he is not as we are. Mrs. Carvalho’s attention and care had gone a long way towards healing the damaged male these past two years, but he would never be a warrior. He would not have been even had he not been so badly wounded emotionally by being held as a blood slave. He was simply not built for it.

Marisol had agreed to my edict, though not without argument of late. She had thought the uneventful two years that had passed since she had killed Vitoria had been an indicator that the Beneloise organization was out of business and of no danger to us. I had told her snakes hibernate when the weather is cold but it does not mean they have gone extinct. She had finally acquiesced to my insistence and I had thought the matter settled, but for a reason I have not yet been able to ascertain she and her grandmother left our home mid-morning few days later while the four of us slept. I was awoken from a sound sleep by a text from her phone that said only ‘Check your email.’

I remember having some amusement at it, thinking she must be downstairs and wondering what the minx was up to. After drawing on a pair of slacks and a tee-shirt, I went downstairs to the kitchen for coffee. When I realized she was not in the house I began to become mildly irritated, believing she must have gone outside into the sunlight where I could not follow her, but I still believed she was on the grounds.

I went to my office and opened up my email from my laptop. Again, there was an email from her with a link. It said only ‘click the link.’ I remember muttering, “Really, now this is getting to be too much Marisol. Where are you?”

I don’t know what I expected to see, but whatever it was, it was not what I saw. The link took me to a live video feed. Marisol was in the center of a darkened room. Only the light streaming in from a high window allowed me to see she was gagged and naked, tied spread-eagled on a bed of some sort. On the periphery I could see the Mrs. Carvalho’s body crumpled on the floor.

I screamed out her name, but there must have been some sort of alarm set on the link to notify the sender when I clicked on it, because a masked face appeared on the screen blocking my view. I will never forget his voice.

"So, you’re Assail. Is that a first or last name? Doesn’t matter. I know where you live. If I could have gotten into that fortress I would have taken you as well. I’d always intended to rape your woman in front of you before I killed her. We’ll just do it this way instead of in person. Maybe I’ll let my boys have a go at her after I’m done before I kill her."

I’d heard the muffled laughter and encouragement of male voices and gripped the arms of my chair in an effort to control my terror for her and clenched my jaw.

“Let Marisol and her grandmother go. If it’s me you want, I will come to you.” The low, controlled tone of my voice had belied the icy chill that ran through my body. Stealthily I pressed the panic button that had been installed beneath my desktop. It would awaken the other residents of the house and send them flying to find me. “And if it is money you seek, I have a great deal of it. You only have to fix a number and it is yours.”

As my cousin’s slammed through the door I looked up and gave a near imperceptible shake of my head. Quietly, they had moved to the sides of my desk to be able to hear but remain out of sight. I knew not what this male knew of my defenses, but I would not give anything away to him easily.

The male had barked a laugh. “They’re not going anywhere. At any rate, the old lady is already dead. Bad luck that. I’d intended to use her to get the pretty one to give me the entry codes into the house, but she croaked on me. Heart attack, by the way she grabbed at her chest. And I don’t want your money. By getting rid of Ricard, Eduardo, and Vitoria, you’ve already cleared my path. It will take me some time to re-establish my clientele, but the supply chain still exists. And once you’re gone all other obstacles will disappear.”

“I am no longer in the business you speak of,” I spoke through gritted teeth, barely controlling my rage. “So your path is clear at any rate. Let her go. She is of no worth to you.”

He had let out a snort. “Oh, she’s of worth. See, this isn’t about money. It’s about revenge. I’m a Beneloise. Not by name, but by birth. And the people you killed were my half-brothers and half sister. In order for me to prove to the people at home that I can pick up where they left off I have to prove myself. Avenging them will do that. But out of curiosity, where are my brother’s bodies? They’ve never been found. I found Vitoria’s rotted corpse in the West Point house when I came looking for them, but not the brothers. It would be nice to be able to put them to rest. Would get me some points with the old guard.”

I remember being grateful he didn’t realize Marisol had killed his sister, hoping it would allow me to direct his vengeance solely towards me. I remember thanking the Scribe Virgin that Marisol found allowing me to drink from her erotic and encouraged me to take her vein regularly during our lovemaking. I remember reaching out my senses and locating the building she was being held in. And I remember glancing at the clock and seeing it was only 3:18 PM and my heart clenching. The sun was still up and would be for some time even this time of year. I had tried to stall, forcing all the calm I could muster into my voice...

“Come now, we are businessmen. Let us settle this between us.”

“We’ve talked enough. Now…” he had moved to be beside the table, “It’s time for action. Tell me,” he had run his hand down her naked body, “Is she a good lay? Well, I guess I’ll find out for myself. I think I’ll take off the gag so you can hear her scream.”

My control had deserted me and I had slammed the desk with my fists and rose, looming over the laptop. “You will let her go or you will never again have a moment’s peace for I will hunt you like an animal and then I will kill you like one.”

He’d only laughed again as he removed the gag and then it had been Marisol’s voice I’d heard…

“ASSAIL DON’T COME FOR ME! EHRIC, EVALE, DON’T LET HIM!!!!” she had screamed.

Her thoughts were of worry I would kill myself in the sun trying to get to her. Worry for my safety. Mine…..

He hit her. His fist doubled up and smashed against her noise, blood erupting from it. I’d shouted her name but she hadn’t spoken again. At her scream my cousins had rounded the desk and restrained me, their backs to the screen so they would not see, but securely enough that I could not bolt for a car and the sunlight. Time stood still for me as the bastard lowered his trousers and raped her savagely, holding a knife to her throat, but I scarcely saw anything but her eyes. They fixed on the screen as though she could see through it into mine own. I saw her fear, her pain but most of all I saw her love. And when he finished and severed her jugular vein, I saw the life leave them.

He’d come to the camera removed his mask. “Get a good look at this face. It’s coming for you,” and with that fleeting glimpse he had turned off the camera.

I’d thrown back my head and howled my pain. It had taken Ehric both Evale both to hold me. Markus had keened softly from the doorway. He had been horrified and unable to make himself come closer but now he slumped to the ground in grief. Ehric had murmured in my ear “He’s a dead man walking, Assail. Do you hear me? A dead man. We will ahvenge them.”

The sun had not quite set when I went to her. The rage and grief had gone from hot to cold and I’d been able to dematerialize to her. Ehric, a man whom I had come to respect for more than his muscle and his obedience, had slapped a tracker on me when he’d still had me in his grasp and followed me. We had found ourselves in a dank basement, the assailant long gone. Marisol lay on the bed, her limbs still tied with blood pooled beneath her. I had slashed the ropes and gathered her broken body to me. Part of me noted the indignities that had been done to her body. The bruises and cuts from a beating that told me she’d fought before she had been subdued. Ehric had put his hand on my shoulder and told me he’d texted Evale and Markus where we were. They were bringing the Range Rover. But I could not focus. Not then. But now … oh, now I had nothing but focus.

Coming back to the present I finished the whiskey and poured a second, my hand steadier as I once again compartmentalized my pain and let the cold rage that had been my constant companion rule me once again. My plans to ahvenge my family was coming together. I still did not know the precise identity of Marisol’s and her grandmother’s murderer but I knew he was a Beneloise and I had already contacted their rivals. And in order to utilize them I needed funds. One of my larger accounts in Switzerland had been asked to send cash to me by registered mail. I assume it is in the stack of envelopes that Markus had put on my desk last night that I had been too busy to go through, but as I knew I would sleep no more this day, I set myself to the task of going through them.

The large manila envelope at the bottom of the pile was indeed from them and held what I had asked for. It was a tidy sum, but not what I would need for large purchases of guns and drugs. No, that would be handled differently, but this would help grease some palms along the way. As I set it back on the desk, I browsed through the remaining mail until I froze, seeing one with Marisol’s name on it. It was from a doctor’s office.

Ripping it open, I read the missive then threw my head back and howled. It read,

“Dear Ms. Carvalho,

Congratulations! We are pleased to inform you the results of your pregnancy test were positive. Please contact our office to set up your first prenatal appointment at your earliest convenience. Meanwhile, we have called in a prescription for prenatal vitamins to the pharmacy you indicated on your intake form. Please begin them immediately.

We look forward to seeing you soon.

Dr. Lynn Jeffries, OB-GYN

Caldwell Maternity Clinic.”