#a part of me wants to ignore that post credit scene. wants to ignore that bucky is working with them. wants bucky to go home to sam after+
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plantswithme · 2 months ago
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okay i saw thunderbolts and im going to talk about it,
thunderbolts spoilers ahead!
okay first i wanna clear some things up—for those who haven't seen the film— on how they get called the new avengers. because i saw some stuff about this online 3 days ago and was so confused.
(i was scared walking into this film after reading people’s tweets and stuff, yes my own fault for reading them but after hearing about the post credit scene i was mad and upset so i said screw it and read some reviews. i really recommend you go see the movie or watch it somewhere and to not rely solely on other peoples reviews, i think forming your own opinion from the source material is important.)
okay, let’s get into it.
starting off with the end of the movie for those who just want to know about the whole new avengers name: at the end of the movie when the team are all walking towards valentina, all pissed off and about to take her in, she tricks them into going after her by slipping through an opening in some rubble and then they are met with a bunch of reporters at the other side. she walks up to a podium she must’ve put there and says that they’re the team she was building all along! (she wasn’t! she wanted bob to kill them all, she is taking credit for them coming together to stop her and to help bob)
she says that they’re the new avengers, announces it in front of a bunch of reporters, neither yelena or bucky or alexei or ava or john says that they are the new avengers, they are all so confused (everyone except for red guardian who is excited smh) bucky does not look happy in this scene.
so yeah, valentina is the one who gives them that name, they dont call themselves that.
it’s all valentina’s fault. she was doing human experimentation.. she is the bad guy in this movie.
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onto my review: my review of the movie is that i enjoyed it, i liked the movie up until the ending and the post credit scene… when in saw those my opinion on this movie went down. if they had changed those two things and added a good sam cameo, i would have a much better opinion on this film.
it also felt a little slow during some parts, and ava killing taskmaster 20 minutes in was… i did not expect that. and im not a fan of them doing that. she deserved better and ava did too like having her kill her was just… ugh. why??
yelena’s story and the exploration of her childhood trauma did make me cry, but they could’ve gone into it even more. but it’s a marvel movie after all so :/
john is still an ass, his wife left him and took their son… i’m not surprised. never liked john and i never will.
alexei is annoying, what he said to yelena in that scene when she was really struggling was nice, i liked that part. i still don’t care for alexei as a character tho and now i hate him too, fuck him for saying shit about sam.
ava is so cool, i really enjoyed her in the movie, her abilities are so sick and she was funny. her and yelena making fun of john throughout the movie was funny, got me cracking up, they don’t like him at all lmaooo.
bob was sweet i like him, the scene where yelena runs to him to try and save him from the void fully taking over… i was crying, tears down my cheeks. and then the others came and joined the hug, it was a really nice moment. his and yelena’s friendship was so sweet and a highlight for me. she is so caring and kind, asking him if he was okay multiple times, not wanting anything to happen to him, wanting him to know that he the isn’t alone, telling him that she has struggles too, that there is a way out of that darkness. the scene where she tells him that some of the darkness in her has lessen already, oh i was emotional. i really enjoyed their bond in this film.
yelena going into the void… the fact that all of them went into the void after ava was like “we have to follow yelena!?” and after john said that he kind of saw something weird when bob touched him, implying that maybe yelena isn’t dead? maybe you just go somewhere?” that’s when bucky was like, okay, let’s do it, he still didn’t 100% know if they would all die or make it out alive but he was willing to risk it and i think that shows who bucky barnes is. that was one thing bucky did in this movie that i actually liked.
i mean i did like bucky in this film, some of his scenes felt off, and i know sebastian questioned many of his lines and stuff throughout filming, apparently questioning the director and kept asking “why?” a lot, even seeming grumpy too, according to his co-stars..
(adding to this on may 5th: it’s been a few days now and tbh after talking to friends and listening to mutuals’ opinions and thoughts, bucky is ooc in this film. sometimes he felt fine and other times he really didn’t. he’s shown as incompetent and stupid, multiple times, doesn’t read the papers/files he’s given, can’t even talk to reporters, and just seems off.. like bucky is sneaky and intelligent and badass and competent and much more and in TB he has two badass scenes and that’s kinda it? :/ like you mean to tell me that bucky barnes, winter soldier couldn’t have easily infiltrated valentina’s plans and with the the congress stuff been able to lie and act the part and gotten shit done without being caught? (like he said something to mel about finding out secret things or something, he was like “i could but i don’t do that anymore”) but i feel like he still would 🤷🏻‍♀️ like we saw him hijack a car in tfatws, he knows how to do stuff like that! bucky is more in character in mission fics ive read and it’s so upsetting that marvel can’t even find script writers who understand and get bucky. him in that post credit scene isn’t the bucky i know. or the bucky we were shown in cabnw or in tfatws. i won’t be ignoring the PCS bc of how sam is treated, it’s too important to do that. and on bucky’s end, im just, ugh. idk. i love him so much ofc i do, im just disappointed. it’s so upsetting to see both your favorite characters be done like this.)
him getting into congress to keep an eye on val was kind of interesting but didn’t go anywhere at all and i think bucky could actually do some good as a congressman, but it wasn’t shown like that at all.
he tries to get val's assistant mel to tell him stuff and eventuallty she does when she realises that valentina is up to some bad stuff. he had some good scenes, he was sarcastic, badass, grumpy and looked really handsome, but yeah :/ i wish he was in the film a bit more and had some more storyline. but he seems to be in a good place right now, at least, which im happy about, bc i want to see him happy. idk what he saw when he was in the void which could've been a cool thing to see but he really isn't the main character, yelena and bob are. he just makes a joke that he has a great past so he's fine, but i dont think he is.. what did he see in the void...
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more stuff and some sambucky talk
it seems like sam and bucky had a disagreement bc bucky for some reason called sam about the copyright claim, having bucky call sam about it in the post credit scene and having him say it went bad is so weird to me. bc bucky knows that sam was asked to rebuild the avengers, bucky knows that, bucky is on sam's side!?(like bucky isn’t upset or mad at sam about that at all, like some ppl said he was smh) he’s upset bc he cares about sam and this whole situation is a mess and bc he messed up. but he wouldn’t even have messed up if he as written in character!! ugh.
like sam and bucky are grown men and i think they would talk this out and not just have one phone call that went poorly. like huh? they’re closer than that, they would communicate better than that, even if sam is angry and upset. like the way they spoke about sam and showed him makes him seem childish about the whole thing, it’s so fucking frustrating.
like having bucky say something like this to yelena: “i talked to sam and it’s a giant mess. he’s not happy which i understand and neither am i” or something!? again: UGH.
sam has every right to be frustrated, upset and angry. and he has the right to copyright the name. he is captain america. he was asked personally by the president to rebuild the avengers, and he told bucky that and now valentina just gives them that name? live on television i assume bc reporters and stuff, like ofc he’s going to do something about it?
people blaming sam and saying that he hurt bucky and nat's sister is fucking crazy, sam did nothing wrong. sam took legal action bc valentina named a random group of people the new avengers, again: on what i assume was live television. it had nothing to do with bucky or yelena be fucking serious.
also, i don’t think they planned on sticking together as a team after the events of the movie, like that to me was kinda obvious? that none of them seemed interested in being part of a team together, but then valentina had to go mess it up.
also in the marvel universe, people don’t like them as the new avengers at all. so in universe, in canon, they are not seen as the avengers to the people, which gives me hope for sam’s team.
it also seemed like no one else knew that sam is planning to build a new team of avengers, he doesn’t seem to have shared that with the media or anyone else other than bucky in the hospital scene, and leila knows too.
since it’s been 14 months since the events of the movie at the time of the post credit scene, i think sam has been in the works of forming a new team which is why he is taking legal action at that point, 14 months later, bc he is working on something.. i really hope that is the case.
so to the people who are mad at sam for this, y’all can fuck right off.
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back to the post credit scene for just a second, alexei walks in wearing that stupid matching tracksuit with the “avengerZ”, insults sam and then the camera goes from alexei to yelena, bucky's reaction isn’t shown, i imagine he looks pissed.
then when alexei says that he had other tracksuits made for bucky and the others, bucky looks so done and kinda ignores him. no one seems to take alexei seriously in this scene, and for that im glad, they all seem to kinda see him as a clown, which pleases me.
do i think it’s upsetting and just plain bullshit that they didn’t have bucky stand up for sam? yes.
to me that is some awful writing, whoever wrote bucky in cabnw wrote him right. the person who wrote him in that post credit scene does not know bucky, does not know or seem to care about how much bucky truly cares and adores and admires and believes in sam, and loves sam.
as to why bucky is still working with that team after 14 months is unknown to me, i have some ideas in my head about the whole thing and if you have any ideas yourself, feel free to let me know, bc that part still doesn’t sit right with me… :/
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so i cant say i see this movie as a full sambucky divorce, per say, bc to me bucky knows that it's sam's job to form a new team of avengers and that sam has the rights to the name, and not valentina or any of the others. bucky is not mad at sam for taking legal action, why the hell would he be?
do i think sam is angry with bucky? yes, to what degree im not sure of right now. like i said earlier i think they would have a talk about the whole situation and not just one phone call that went poorly.
i want them to be in a good place in canon :/
i will end this with saying fuck that post credit scene.
the fact that steve was mentioned in a more respectful way than sam is fucking disgusting. ava said something like "we know what happens when a good person like steve rogers get the serum. what happens when a man like bob gets powers?" steve wasn’t insulted and made to look like an asshole in the post credit scene, sam was.
sam wilson deserves better, anthony mackie deserves better. sam wilson fans are allowed to be upset, we're allowed to express ourselves how ever we want, sam wilson has been sidelined and ignored since the end of tfatws and before that too.
having valentina announce them as the new avengers is so incredibly disappointing and disrespectful and seeing that they’re still a team after 14 months too, is disappointing and makes no sense to me. at least the world doesn’t see them as the new avengers, they don’t seem to like them at all, so at least there’s that.
i swear if marvel doesn’t give sam a team that he leads soon i am going to be convicted of a crime.
if anyone actually took their time and read all this thank you for reading, even if this post is a little all over the place, i hope it makes sense. have a lovely day
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woantohae · 2 months ago
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In my arms || (Bob Reynolds x reader)
Summary: The Thunderbolts are constantly on missions, busy trying to do good and save whoever they can. One of them was Bob Reynolds, the defenseless yet powerful man who is part of this team and family. However, he doesn't participate in these missions so he can continue practicing controlling his powers.
Despite telling them he's capable, the team prefers to give him more time to get used to them, until one mission, when a member of the team is injured. And all Bob can think about is the fury he feels when he hears Y/N being hurt. And how much he wants revenge on whoever did it.
content warnings: angst, he fell first and he fell harder, "avengers" tower, fluff, thunderbolts being a family, violence, curse words, SPOILERS FOR THUNDERBOLTS*, Yelena and Bob being like brother and sister, "touch her and you die" trope.
Author's note: I WATCHED THUNDERBOLTS*!!!! And let me tell you, it was better than i imagined. Honestly, it became one of my favorites and it can easily be in my top 3 of Marvel movies. I just can't describe the experience with enough words, but the waiting was totally worth it ✨️ AND THE POST CREDIT SCENE 👀 MARVEL ATE WITH THAT ONE.
With that being said, i'm excited to tell you that i'm gonna write more of Bob Reynolds 👉🏻👈🏻 So here you go, a one shot with him, wich contains a few spoilers of the movie. At this point our reader will be polaris lol.
Hope you like it and comment what do you think of this one 💌
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Bob was getting used to the place.
What had once been Avengers Tower had now become his new "home." He had an incredible view of New York City, several rooms to hang out in, thousands of dishes and meals he'd never been able to prepare in his life, and the pleasant company he shared every day.
The team had made him feel comfortable and part of something worthwhile, despite what they'd gone through to get to this moment.
Bob still felt guilty about what happened when Void took control of him and darkened everything in its path, even when Yelena reminded him it wasn't his fault and that he wasn't alone. The blonde had become a trusted person for him and was always there when he needed her. He told her his secrets and how he felt, and the Russian always gave him advice or a word of encouragement. Even with the trust he had in her, he confided in her something he never thought would happen to him. Or rather, something he thought was impossible to happen in such a short time.
He was attracted to Y/N.
The girl whom his other self had caused to see horrible things from her past, the one who could move metal objects with a simple flick of her fingers, and the one who made his heart race and his cheeks blush. It was a feeling that consumed him every time he was near her or even thought about her.
And Yelena, being the good spy she was and good at reading people, knew how Bob felt about Y/N. She always encouraged him to get closer and talk to her more, but Bob simply couldn't do it. It was not that easy.
"It sounds easy," John says, after hearing the plan for carrying out the mission.
Bob shakes his head to return to reality and ignore such thoughts.
"Wait until we get there and they welcome us with open arms," ​​Bucky says, a hint of amusement in his voice.
"We still made it last time, and look at us here," Y/N replies, shrugging her shoulders.
Ava laughs and shakes her head.
"We'd better get moving," she says.
Bob looks at the group with hope in his eyes, but feels unsure about what he's gonna say.
"Can I come with you, guys?" he asks.
All heads turn to look at him with a mixture of surprise and sympathy for his question. They know he wants to help however he can, but after Void was under control and hadn't appeared for quite some time, they weren't so sure it was a good idea to expose him like that again.
"Bob..." Yelena begins to say.
Bob hurries to explain himself.
"I know what you're gonna say. But I think I'm ready, I know I can control it" Bob says with determination in his voice "I've been practicing and trying to talk to him, so maybe I can do it, today"
"We know, Bobby," says John, "But we must complete the mission without any mistakes or problems along the way."
The brunette looks down and clears his throat, nodding. He raises his gaze to smile and meet Y/N's gaze, who smiles back.
"No, no, I understand," he says dejectedly. "When the time is right, I can come with you."
Bucky pats his shoulder and Alexei gives him a thumbs-up. Despite their attempt to lift his spirits, he can't help but feel useless and without any reason to be in the group, other than washing dishes, tidying the place, or reading books he finds lying around.
He hates the feeling.
But it is what it is, right now. And he has to face it.
After the meeting to organize the plan, the group dispersed to look for the weapons and prepare the car in which they would go to the location. Bob watched from afar as the rest of them prepared, while playing with his fingers. He shifted his gaze to the large window overlooking the city and didn't feel Y/N's presence approaching him.
"Hey," she said in a soft tone.
Bob turned his head to look at her and smiled delightedly.
"Hey," she asked.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
He nods and laughs softly, pretending to be okay and swallowing the feeling that bothered him.
"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine"
The girl mimics his smile and stares at him, while Bob feels the heat spread to his cheeks.
"Hey, how about we watch a movie when I get back?" she offers, patting his arm to get his attention.
Bob smiles.
"I was actually thinking it could be a movie night with just us. If you like that idea," Y/N says, crossing her arms and shrugging her shoulders with a smile on her face.
"A movie would be nice. I think it would be fun to have a movie night with the rest of the team," he says awkwardly "We haven't had one of those in a while, so..."
She lets out a soft laugh, thinking how cute he looks all flustered.
"Oh..." he remains silent to calm his nerves until he speaks again so as not to make a fool of himself. "Oh! Yeah, just the two of us. Of course. It could be fun. Count me in!"
Y/N smiles and laughs softly, wich sounds angelical to Bob's ears.
"Great. It's a date" she says.
Bucky calls her to let her know they're about to leave, so she starts walking away from Bob.
"See you, Bob."
"See you. Good luck," Bob says with a dazed smile on his face, remembering the girl's words.
It's a date.
Bob walks to his room with an excited smile, feeling happiness in his chest, but when he remembers the last thing Y/N said, his eyes widen.
"Oh shit! It is a date!"
He needs to prepare for it.
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Bob listened and watched from the communications room to see how the team was doing on the mission.
It wasn't going so easy as they planed back in the tower a few hours ago, as they had run into a group of mercenaries who weren't going to give up so easily. The brunette just hoped everyone was okay and managed to complete the mission—and he really hoped Y/N was okay and didn't get hurt.
A feeling of anguish and anxiety was causing Bob's chest to tighten. His leg kept moving as he played with the Rubik's Cube in his hands, unable to complete a color.
The sound of bullets filled his ears, and his jaw clenched as he heard and saw Yelena or Bucky being hit. Alexei grumbled as he tried to pull a man off John to help him, and Ava took care of a few. Y/N tried to stop the bullets as best she could, but there were some hidden snipers she couldn't sense with her powers so easily.
"There's to many of them!" John complains through the earpiece in Bob's ear.
"Fuck! If we don't stop the ones from the roof we cannot go back to the car!" Ava exclaims in an almost exhaustive voice.
"Shit. C'mon guys" Bob whispers while frowning his eyebrows at the scene.
"Bob, can you see how many are on the roof?" Yelena asks from the communicator in her ear.
"Uh, yeah, yeah" he says inmediatly "There's five on the roof. Three of them has guns and two of them are programming something on the computer. Seems like.... oh no"
"What Bob?" Bucky asks.
"It's a bomb! You need to get out of there" Bob says quickly.
"Shit," Yelena curses.
"I can try to stop them. But I need you to cover my back," Y/N says in a confident, hurried tone.
Bob watches as the girl begins to head toward the other side to attack the group of men with guns at the entrance. The others try to stop anyone from attacking her, and she moves stealthily between the bodies to reach the entrance. Bob focuses his attention on the cameras in the building that shows Y/N, his heart aching at what's happening in the footage. Or what could happen.
"Please, be careful," Bob whispers.
Y/N stops the guards' bullets at the entrance with precision in her movements and attacks some who plan to hit her. Bob's eyes glance at the rest of the team as they manage to escape thanks to the distraction caused by the girl with green sparkles flashing from her fingers. However, he doesn't stop for more than five seconds just to check on the girl again. He wants to make sure she's okay, even if it's from behind the computer. Far away from the place where she is right now —just the thought of it makes his inner self freak out.
Something it's beginning to awake inside of him. Something he thought he had buried for his own good.
Or rather someone.
"Y/N, all done. Let's head to the car. I'll try to get to you right away," Bucky orders.
"No. It's okay, I got this," she chimes in stubbornly.
Bob shakes his head.
But before she can do so, a stray bullet hits her shoulder, destabilizing the girl.
"Fuck!" she complains, touching her shoulder.
"Y/N?" Bucky asks worriedly.
"Y/N!" Bob yells, watching as one of the guards hits her with her gun on the back of her head, causing the girl to fall unconscious to the ground.
That's it.
Bob rushes out of the tower's communications room and runs to the balcony, where he takes to the air with determination. He doesn't stop for a second, because time is precious, especially after seeing Y/N getting attacked. The only thing that keeps repeating in his mind is the visual image of the girl being injured, so he moves quickly through the air until he reaches the others. He had seen the coordinates and the area where they were, so it was easy for him to arrive in time.
Bob tries to find the place that the camera allowed him to watched the area in wich the girl was back at the tower, and when he finds it, he is surprised to find that one of the men responsible of attacking Y/N is carrying her unconscious body in his arms. Fury courses through his veins at the sight, and he rushes to stop the bastard. It's as if he's being consumed by darkness, a sensation he knows all too well.
As soon as he's in front of the guy, he stops him and without a second thought, tries to attack him, careful not to hit Y/N. The man looks at him in horror and carefully places the girl's body on the ground, then raises his hands in surrender.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know..." he stumbles, but all Bob sees is red.
He growls and begins to mercilessly beat the man's body, making him bleed, and doesn't stop until he's unconscious. Blow after blow, unleashing all the anger he felt at seeing how the bastard hurt the girl. He can still see her grimace of pain and how her body fell unconscious to the ground, helpless, and who knows what they might have done to her if he hadn't arrived in time.
"Please...." the man begs almost unconscious.
Bob doesn't hear him. He doesn't want to.
And Void doesn't want to too.
The rest of the team arrives at Y/N's location, only to see her lying on the ground with a scarlet stain forming on the shoulder of her suit, while Bob kills the man. Ava approaches the girl's body and makes sure she has a steady pulse, while John makes sure that no one appears and attacks them by surprise.
"Bob," Yelena warns and tries to approach him to make him see reason.
"No! He hurt her. No one can touch her, or hurt her!" he exclaims in a mixture of anger and darkness. "No one! You heard me? Fucking no one!"
The others stare at the scene and notice how Y/N wakes up and observes the state Bob is in. Ignoring the pain in her shoulder, she rushes over to him and wraps her arms around him from behind, resting her face on his.
"Bob, hey. It's okay," she murmurs in his ear, feeling the man begin to slow down the blows, so she tightens her grip on his body. "I'm okay. Everything will be okay."
Bob calms down and brings his now covered in blood hands to Y/N's arms, then turns his body and hugs her with all his strength, trying to cover her body to protect her just in case, and also feel her in his arms and make sure nothing happens to her anymore.
"You are hurt" he whispers in her ear.
"It's just a scratch. I'll be fine" Y/N says with a small smile on her lips.
"He hurt you. I couln't allow him to do it" he says in a broken voice.
Y/N looks at the rest of the team and smiles at them, letting them know she's okay. Kinda. Bucky sighs and shakes his head at the girl in that state, knowing she must be screaming from the pain of the bullet, while Alexei smiles sideways and tries to encourage her from a distance. The blonde russian girl mouths to her that she will get the car ready to go, to wich Y/N nods and indicates her to do so.
"We still have our date," she tells him, still standing with the brunette, glancing at the man's lifeless body.
Bob lets out a sigh and nods his head against Y/N's chest, agreeing with her.
"Our date," he says in a soft tone, relaxing at the touch of her fingers in his hair. Although he can't help but feel anger again when he smells the metallic scent coming from the girl's wound.
"Yeah. Are we still up to that?"
"Definitely" Bob answers and lets out a small laugh.
She smiles and then pulls away from him to look him in the eye. Those blue orbits who watch her with a spark on his eyes.
"So let's go home and have our date, okay?" Bob nods and then lowers his gaze to the girl's wound.
"First, we need to treat your wound," he says, pointing to the red stain on her suit.
"Would you help me with that?"
"You don't have to ask me twice."
They both stare at each other with a small smile on their faces, understanding how much they care for each other and would do anything to keep them safe and viceversa.
Especially Bob.
And as long as Y/N is in his arms, he'll be okay.
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cloudyluun · 5 months ago
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Office Hours (professor!harry) | (ongoing)
A simple essay question leads to something far more dangerous. As tension rises between you and Professor Styles, you’re forced to ask yourself: is desire worth the risk?
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What starts as just another concert night takes an unexpected turn when Harry Styles himself locks eyes with Y/N from the stage.
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Moving into her new London apartment, Y/N never expected her infuriatingly irresistible neighbor, Harry Styles, to become her most dangerous obsession.
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A secret relationship, a high-profile event, and an unbearable amount of tension. When the cameras flash, will the truth stay hidden—or will everything come crashing down?
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A camera, a suggestion, and a night of absolute filth. Once the recording starts, there’s no stopping what comes next.
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A sun-soaked, drama-filled collab where Harry learns the hard way that his biggest romantic rival isn’t another guy—it’s the book you won’t put down.
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And The Oscar Goes Too... (famous!actress x famous!harry) [part 1]
Into The Wild (tour guide!harry) [part 1]
The Cost of Keeping You (CEO!harry) [part 1]
Lash Out (And Love Me) (nail&lashtag!reader) [part 1]
if you scrolled all the way ily!! 💞
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scarletwinterxx · 4 months ago
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magnets - choi seungcheol imagine 1/2
buckle up bcs this is going to be a long one, i tried i really did i tried my best writing as much angst as i can. i'm not the best in that genre but i think i like how it turned out... i tried my best to put into words the scenes I had in my head. i needed to make this in 2 parts since it won't let me post all at once😅 so yes THERE WILL BE A SECOND HALF
tbh out of all the stories i wrote here, this one has the most 'me' in it. sad if you realize why i say that but yea😅 in my mind, cheol is the type of man whose love isn't consuming, it just makes everything better, easier, a little less terrifying bcs no matter what you can count on him to be there with you. i guess that's what make me love this story even more. hope you do too!
for my other svt fics, check them here
All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2025 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.
(pics not mine, credits to rightful owner)
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You’ve heard it all before. You're too picky. Your standards are unrealistic. Men aren’t that bad.
Lies. All of it.
Men are that bad. They lack common sense, can’t read between the lines, and somehow think saying "you’re not like other girls" is a compliment. You’ve dodged so many disastrous setups that your friends have given up entirely, dubbing you "The Man Hater." 
Until a certain someone crossed paths with you. 
It happens on a regular Friday night. Your group is at some bar Mingyu insisted on checking out, and you're barely listening to Jeonghan talk about his latest situationship when you see him.
Seungcheol walks in like he owns the place. Broad shoulders, sharp jawline, and a presence that makes women glance up instinctively. He doesn’t seem to notice. He’s in a plain black tee, jeans that fit just right, and a watch that looks like it costs more than your rent. The kicker? He doesn’t even try to look hot. He just is.
"Who is that?" you ask, cutting off Jeonghan mid-sentence.
Your friends freeze "Did you just…" Jeonghan starts.
"Who," you repeat, your voice dangerously close to sounding interested, "is that?"
Mingyu, still coughing, thumps his chest. "Choi Seungcheol," he wheezes. "Why?"
"He’s hot," you declare, because there’s no point in denying the undeniable.
"You hate men," Irene reminds you, like you’ve somehow forgotten
"I hate most men," you correct. "That one? I want him."
Jeonghan bursts into laughter. "This is the best night of my life."
You ignore them because Seungcheol is making his way to the bar, completely unaware of the chaos he’s caused. You watch, entranced, as he leans against the counter. When the bartender hands him a drink, he nods in thanks. Polite, effortless. Not once does he scan the crowd for attention like most men do. He knows he has it.
Mingyu, having finally recovered, shakes his head. "No way. Seungcheol turns down everyone."
"Not for long," you murmur, already formulating a plan.
Jihyo narrows her eyes. "Oh my God. You’re serious. You’re actually serious."
"I am."
Irene stares at you, then at Seungcheol. "I give you five minutes before he shuts you down."
"Three," Mingyu corrects.
"Ten," Jeonghan bets
"Have some faith," you scoff, already standing up. "Watch and learn, peasants."
You stride towards the bar, heart hammering, but determination stronger. It’s been years since you’ve been genuinely interested in someone. You’ll be damned if you let this moment pass.
Seungcheol notices you as you approach, and when your eyes meet, he tilts his head slightly curious but unreadable. Up close, he’s even better. You swallow.
Then, with all the confidence in the world, you slide onto the stool next to him before speaking
"So, do we skip the small talk, or do I have to pretend I don’t already want you?"
Seungcheol blinks. Then, he laughs. low, rich, interested and just like that, the game begins. He turns fully to face you, one elbow resting on the bar, drink held loosely in his hand. His gaze flickers over you—assessing, but not in that sleazy way men do when they think they have the upper hand. No, this is different. 
He’s curious.
"That’s a bold opener," he muses, taking a sip of his drink.
You smirk. "I don’t do weak ones."
He hums, seemingly unfazed, but the twitch at the corner of his mouth betrays him. "And what exactly do you already want from me?"
Your fingers drum against the bar as you lean in slightly, "Wouldn’t you like to know?"
For a second, he doesn’t say anything. He just watches you, then he sets his drink down with a quiet clink and exhales a small chuckle. "You’re not like the others."
"God, please tell me that’s not your usual line," you tease.
His grin widens. "No. Usually, I don’t even entertain conversations."
"Tragic," you say dryly. "You’ve been missing out."
His tongue runs along the inside of his cheek, and you swear you see a flicker of actual interest settle in his expression. Then, suddenly, he shifts gears.
"You came over here with a plan," he states, amusement laced in his voice. "Go ahead. Impress me."
Oh, he’s fun. You tilt your head, feigning thoughtfulness. "Alright. First, we exchange names not because I don’t already know yours, but because manners are important."
Seungcheol chuckles, but he plays along. "Choi Seungcheol."
You extend a hand. "Nice to meet you, Seungcheol" you say his name, telling him yours also
"I know who you are." That throws you off for exactly half a second, and you hate how much you like hearing him say your name. 
"Oh? And how exactly did you hear about me?"
"I have ears," he shrugs. "And friends who talk too much." he looks behind you. You glance back at your table, where your friends are openly staring.
"They bet against you, didn’t they?"
"Obviously." you scowl then turn to look at him again
"And yet, here we are."
"Here we are," you echo, matching his smirk.
He looks at you for a moment longer, as if weighing his next move. Then, he leans in slightly, voice dropping just enough to send a shiver down your spine.
"Alright. You’ve got my attention. Now what?"
You don’t get flustered easily. You’ve shut down men with nothing but a raised brow and a well-placed bless your heart more times than you can count. But there’s something about the way Seungcheol leans in, watching you with that amused little smirk, that makes your pulse trip over itself.
"That depends. Are you going to buy me a drink, or am I going to have to suffer through this conversation sober?"
His smirk turns into a full grin, slow and devastating. "So demanding."
"I don’t waste time," you quip
He chuckles, a deep, satisfied sound, before signaling to the bartender. "Get her whatever she wants," he tells them, then glances back at you. "And if you say something ridiculous, I’m judging you."
"Wow," you scoff, placing a hand over your heart. "You don’t even know my order, and you’re already prepared to be disappointed? You really are different."
Seungcheol snorts. "Just don’t tell me it’s some overly complicated drink with eight different ingredients."
You hum, making a show of considering his words before turning to the bartender. "A whiskey sour."
Seungcheol raises an eyebrow, clearly impressed. "Not bad."
"Did you think I was going to order an appletini?"
"Honestly? I wouldn’t put it past you."
You laugh, shaking your head as the bartender hands you your drink. You take a sip, enjoying the slight tang, then tilt the glass in his direction. "See? No judgment necessary."
"I’ll admit, I’m a little relieved," he teases, taking a sip of his own drink.
You narrow your eyes playfully. "So, is this your thing?"
"My thing?"
"Buying girls drinks, making them feel special, then walking away like a mysterious, unattainable dream?"
Seungcheol huffs out a quiet laugh. "Not really. Like I said, I usually don’t entertain conversations."
"But you’re entertaining this one."
He tilts his glass toward you in a silent toast. "I am."
You clink your glass against his, a slow smirk creeping onto your lips. "I must be special, then."
Seungcheol watches you over the rim of his glass, his gaze just a little darker now. "You must be."
You linger at the bar with Seungcheol for a few more moments, exchanging teasing remarks and sidelong glances, but eventually, you decide to leave while you're ahead.
"Well, this has been fun," you say, setting your now-empty glass on the counter.
Seungcheol tilts his head. "Leaving already?"
"What, you want me to stay?"
He huffs a quiet laugh. "I wouldn’t mind."
You pretend to consider it, tapping your chin thoughtfully. "Tempting… but I like to keep things interesting."
Before he can respond, you slide your arm across the bar toward him, palm up. His brows raise slightly, but he doesn’t hesitate. He picks up a pen left behind by the bartender and, with deliberate strokes, scrawls his number across your forearm.
When he finishes, he caps the pen, meeting your gaze with a knowing smirk. "Your move."
You glance at the numbers, then back at him. "We’ll see." Then, without another word, you turn on your heel and walk back to your table.
As expected, your friends are staring. The moment you reach the table, Jihyo blurts, "What happened?!"
You take your seat, completely unbothered, and casually extend your arm, showing off the ink on your skin. Silence.
Then
"WHAT THE—?!" Mingyu practically screeches, nearly knocking over his drink in the process. “Wait, wait. So, you—the man hater—just casually waltzed over there, flirted with Choi Seungcheol, and now you have his number?"
"Looks like it." You examine your arm with a smug smile.
Jihyo grips your wrist, eyes darting over the digits. "So? Are you texting him? Calling? When’s the wedding?"
You shrug, retracting your arm. "I’m not texting him."
Jihyo looks betrayed. "Why the hell not?!"
"Where’s the fun in that?" You take a slow sip of your drink. "Let’s see if he texts first."
Jeonghan looks at you before the evil smile shows on his face, “You didn’t give him your number, didn’t you?”
“Nope”
Jeonghan leans forward. "Oh, you’re evil."
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You don’t text him that night. Or the next. His number, which you took time to save on your phone, remains stagnant on your contact list. 
You’re lounging on your couch, half-listening to a true crime documentary, when your phone buzzes with a call from an unknown number. You stare at it for a second, debating whether to answer, before sighing and picking up.
"Hello?"
Silence. Then—
"Was this your plan all along?"
You freeze. That voice is unmistakable. Leaning back against the cushions, you fight the smirk threatening to form. "Choi Seungcheol."
"You remember my name. Good to know," he deadpans.
You hum, inspecting your nails. "You sound a little… frustrated."
"I had to track down your friends just to get your number," he says, and you can hear the irritation laced with amusement. "Do you know how annoying that was?"
You bite back a laugh. "Who caved?"
"Mingyu. He held out for, like, ten seconds."
You laugh, imagining the exact moment Seungcheol probably cornered Mingyu, all intimidating and brooding, while your friend fumbled immediately.
"So," Seungcheol continues, "tell me, was this some elaborate game? Give me your number, wait for me to text, then just ghost me?"
"I didn’t ghost you. I just never texted in the first place."
"Exactly."
You grin, stretching out lazily. "Maybe I just wanted to see if you’d chase."
A pause. Then, in a tone far too smug for your liking "So you like being chased?"
Your stomach does a stupid little flip, but you refuse to let him know that. "I like seeing who puts in effort," you reply smoothly.
"And? Impressed yet?"
"You’re getting there," you tease.
Seungcheol chuckles, a low, satisfied sound. "Good. Then meet me for dinner."
You blink. "What?"
"Dinner," he repeats, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. "You know, a meal? Where two people sit down, talk, and eat?"
"I know what dinner is," you snort. "I just wasn’t expecting you to be so forward."
"You made me hunt you down," he says. "You don’t get to act surprised." Okay. Fair.
"Alright, then," you say, biting your lip to contain your grin. "Pick me up at eight."
And just like that, Choi Seungcheol is taking you to dinner. And at exactly 7:59, your phone buzzes.
Seungcheol: I’m outside.
You glance at the time and snort. Of course, he’s punctual.
Grabbing your purse, you take one last look in the mirror before heading out. As soon as you step outside, you spot Seungcheol leaning casually against his car. A sleek, black beauty that looks just as effortlessly expensive as he does.
His eyes sweep over you as you approach, and he smirks. "You clean up nice."
You arch a brow. "I always look nice."
"Cocky."
Once he’s in the driver’s seat, he glances at you. "Comfortable?"
You hum, running a hand over the buttery leather seats. "Not bad. I guess your car is alright."
Seungcheol scoffs. "You guess? This car is a masterpiece."
You grin. "I’m sure it’s great at making up for other shortcomings."
He barks out a laugh, shaking his head as he pulls onto the road. "You just can’t help yourself, can you?"
"It’s a gift," you say sweetly.
He glances at you, amusement dancing in his eyes. "You really made me work for this date."
"You chased," you remind him.
"And you liked it."
You pretend to consider. "A little."
He huffs a quiet laugh. "Good. Because I don’t plan on stopping."
You meet his gaze, and for once, you don’t have a witty comeback. Seungcheol pulls up to a sleek high-rise, handing his keys off to the valet like it’s second nature. You step out, glancing up at the towering building, the city lights reflecting off the glass.
You give him a sideways look. “Fancy.”
He smirks. The elevator ride is smooth and silent, except for the way Seungcheol occasionally glances at you. When the doors open, you step into a dimly lit, impossibly exclusive restaurant. Floor-to-ceiling windows frame the glittering skyline, the city sprawling below like something out of a movie.
A host greets you by name before leading you to a table near the window. You raise an eyebrow. “How did you even get a reservation here?”
Seungcheol just shrugs, sliding into his seat. “I have my ways.”
“That’s not an answer.”
He leans back, studying you with that same amused smirk. “You like it?”
It’s stunning, but you refuse to give him the satisfaction just yet. “It’s alright.”
He laughs, shaking his head. “Unbelievable.”
The waiter arrives, and Seungcheol orders without even glancing at the menu. You squint at him. “You come here often?”
“Not really. Just know what’s good.”
“So, what, you bring all your dates here?”
Seungcheol sets down his glass, eyes locked onto yours. “No.”
You tilt your head. “No?”
He shakes his head. “You’re the first.”
Your stomach does something stupid and traitorous, but you keep your expression cool. “Guess I should feel special.”
His lips quirk up. “You should.”
And damn it, for once, you do. As the waiter leaves, Seungcheol leans forward, swirling the dark liquid in his glass before giving you an all-too-amused look.
“So, I heard something interesting from Mingyu.”
You raise an eyebrow. “That’s never a good sign.” 
“Apparently, you have a reputation.”
You take a slow sip of your drink. “Do I?”
Seungcheol smirks. “Something about being a ‘man hater,’ quote-unquote.”
You nearly choke. “Oh, for the love of—” You set your glass down with a little more force than necessary. “I am not a man hater.”
He rests his chin on his hand, clearly entertained. “Mingyu made it sound pretty serious.”
You roll your eyes. “Mingyu is dramatic. I just—” You gesture vaguely. “—don’t waste my time with idiots.”
“So, most men are idiots?”
You sigh, giving him a pointed look. “Look, I just have high standards. That doesn’t make me a man hater.” You pick up your drink, muttering, “Mingyu talks too much.”
Seungcheol just laughs, looking way too pleased with himself. You lean back in your chair, twirling the stem of your wine glass between your fingers, watching him with a knowing smirk.
"You know," you start casually, "I heard something about you too."
Seungcheol raises an eyebrow. "Oh?"
You nod. "Apparently, you’re the guy who turns down women without a second thought."
He hums, taking a sip of his drink before setting it down. "Mingyu, again?"
"Maybe."
He smirks. "He really needs a hobby."
"Don’t change the subject," you tease, tilting your head. "So, is it true?"
He doesn’t answer immediately. Instead, he watches you for a moment, like he’s deciding how much to say. "Depends," he finally says.
"On what?"
"On what you think ‘true’ means."
You narrow your eyes. "That sounds like something a guy who’s absolutely guilty would say."
Seungcheol chuckles, shaking his head. "Look, I’m not some heartless bastard. I just don’t waste time on something I know won’t go anywhere."
You cross your arms. "And what exactly makes you so sure it won’t go anywhere?"
He shrugs, voice even. "You can tell when someone only wants you for the wrong reasons."
Something about the way he says it makes you pause. It’s not cocky. It’s just… matter-of-fact.
You watch him carefully. "So, what, they just like the idea of you?"
He meets your gaze, unreadable. "Something like that."
You hold his stare, and for a moment, the teasing dies down, replaced by something heavier. Something real. Then, because you refuse to let things get too serious too quickly, you click your tongue.
"Damn," you say, shaking your head. "And here I was thinking you were just playing hard to get."
Seungcheol laughs, the tension breaking. "And yet, you still showed up."
You grin. "Guess I like a challenge, too."
He lifts his glass toward you in a silent toast.
"Good," he murmurs, eyes dark with amusement. "I’d be disappointed if you didn’t."
The food was amazing, company even better. He’s funny without trying, you don’t think you laughed that much in a while. And a guy being the reason? A miracle truly. 
He’s driving you back home leaning back in the passenger seat, comfortably full from dinner, when his voice cuts through the quiet.
"So." His fingers drum lazily against the wheel. "Why didn’t you text me?"
You glance at him, feigning innocence. "Text you?"
He gives you a look. "You know. After that first night."
You smirk, tilting your head. "Ohhh, you mean when you wrote your number on my arm like some overconfident frat boy?"
Seungcheol scoffs, but his lips twitch. "I was being resourceful."
"Sure." You shrug. "Guess I just wasn’t in a rush."
He raises an eyebrow. "Weren’t interested?"
"I didn’t say that."
"Didn’t not say it either."
You chuckle. "Alright, fine. Maybe I just wanted to see how serious you were."
Seungcheol hums. "So, making me track down your friends and practically interrogate Mingyu was a test?"
You flash him a grin. "And you passed."
He glances at you, amusement glinting in his eyes. "I knew you were trouble."
"You knew," you agree, smirking. "And yet, here you are."
Seungcheol shakes his head, but there’s no hiding the way his lips curl up. "Yeah," he murmurs, like it’s more to himself than to you. "Here I am."
You don’t tell anyone about the dinner. Not because you’re trying to be secretive, but because there’s nothing to tell. At least, that’s what you tell yourself but the others notice something.
"You’re in a good mood," Jihyo says one afternoon, squinting at you suspiciously over her coffee.
You blink. "Am I not allowed to be?"
"You are," she says slowly. "It’s just unusual."
Mingyu chimes in from across the table. "Yeah, you haven’t made fun of me once today. It’s kinda weirding me out."
You roll your eyes. "You want me to insult you?"
"Lowkey, yeah."
Jeonghan, who’s been scrolling through his phone this whole time, suddenly looks up. "Wait. You are acting different."
Irene nods, narrowing her eyes. "Yeah. You’re… less murdery. "You know." She gestures vaguely. "Less I’ll kill a man if he looks at me the wrong way."
You groan. "You guys are so dramatic."
"Okay, so what happened?" Jihyo presses.
"Nothing."
Jeonghan smirks. "That means something." Four pairs of eyes immediately narrow at you.
"Who is it?" Jeonghan adds, grinning like a wolf. "Oh, wait—" His eyes gleam with mischief. "Who’s the poor bastard?"
You roll your eyes. "There is no bastard. Poor or otherwise."
"She’s deflecting," Jihyo announces.
Mingyu leans forward. "It’s Seungcheol, isn’t it?"
You don’t react. Not visibly but the millisecond of silence is enough. Jeonghan’s grin explodes.
"Ohhhh, no way." Mingyu screeches.
You groan, dropping your head into your hands. You should’ve known. You deny, deny, deny until they finally give up, though not without a lot of suspicious side-eyes and unnecessary winks from Jeonghan.
By the time they stop prying, you think you’re in the clear.
That is, until Friday night.
It’s just supposed to be a normal night out—drinks, chaos, and Mingyu probably embarrassing himself at some point. The usual.
But then you see him.
Seungcheol.
And he’s not alone. You clock him the moment you step into the bar, leaning against the counter with a drink in hand, looking ridiculously good in a black button-up with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He’s mid-laugh, talking to someone. Looks like a close friend. 
You don’t react, keeping your expression neutral, but Jeonghan notices immediately.
"Why do you look like you just saw a ghost?" he asks, following your gaze.
And because the universe is cruel, that’s the exact moment Seungcheol glances over and meets your eyes. A slow, knowing smirk spreads across his lips.
Jeonghan watches it all happen. His eyes widen before he turns to you, grinning like the menace he is. "Oh. My. God."
Mingyu, of course, is oblivious. "Drinks first!" he announces, leading the group toward an open spot by the bar.
Irene and Jihyo follow easily, already deep in conversation, but you feel Jeonghan at your side. His eyes are glinting. You just know he’s about to be a problem.
"You know," he says casually, "for someone who ‘definitely did not go on a date with Seungcheol,’ you two sure looked like you have history."
You don’t even blink. "I don’t know what you’re talking about."
Jeonghan snickers. "Right. And I’m a law-abiding citizen." You ignore him, signaling the bartender for a drink.
Everything is fine or at least it was until Seungcheol and his friend start making their way over. You don’t react. But you know Jeonghan notices the way you straighten up, the way your fingers tap once against the bar before going still.
His friend gets there first, smiling easily at the group. "Hey," he greets. "Didn’t know you guys were coming out tonight."
Mingyu perks up. "Joshua Hong! What’s up?" He claps Joshua's shoulder, immediately pulling him into conversation.
And that’s when he speaks.
"Small world, huh?"
You refuse to turn your head too fast, refuse to let your body react. Instead, you sip your drink first, then glance to the side. Seungcheol is looking at you like he knows something..
You raise an eyebrow. "Not really. Bars exist."
Mingyu, bless him, is still too caught up in talking to Joshua to notice the undercurrent of whatever is happening here. Irene and Jihyo are watching, though. They’re pretending to be casual, but you can feel their curiosity.
Seungcheol doesn’t drop it. He leans slightly closer, just enough for his voice to drop between the two of you. "You avoiding me?"
"Why would I do that?"
He tilts his head, pretending to think. "Maybe because someone went on a date with me and then acted like it never happened."
Jeonghan is eating this up. He’s watching like it’s his favorite drama, sipping his drink with barely concealed glee.
You sip your drink again, unfazed. "Must not have been that memorable then."
Seungcheol laughs like, full-on laughs and somehow that’s worse than if he had been annoyed.
"Oh, this is fun," he murmurs, shaking his head.
"You need better hobbies," you reply dryly.
"You’re right. I should pick up dating mysterious, difficult women who don’t text back."
You glance at him. "So you’re saying I’m a challenge?"
He smirks. "I’m saying I like challenges."
Your lips curve, but you don’t let the smile take over. You turn back to your drink instead and just like that, the moment passes. Instead, he just slides into conversation with the rest of the group like nothing happened. Like he’s not already thinking about the next time he’ll get you alone.
The night goes on as if nothing happened. As if Seungcheol didn’t just throw you off balance with his ridiculous smirk and infuriatingly charming presence. But then, when Seungcheol and Joshua drift off to another part of the bar, Jihyo pounces.
"Okay, explain."
You feign ignorance, sipping your drink. "Explain what?"
Irene scoffs. "Don’t play dumb. You were literally just flirting with him."
You roll your eyes. "I was not."
"That was the most obvious non-flirting flirting I’ve ever seen," Jihyo insists. "And I’ve known Jeonghan for years."
Jeonghan smirks. "She’s right, you know."
Mingyu, now finally catching up, furrows his brows. "Wait. Are we talking about Seungcheol?"
"No, we’re talking about your ability to be dense," Irene says, exasperated
Jihyo leans in. "I thought you wanted him."
You groan, rubbing your temples. "I do."
She blinks. "Then what’s the problem?"
You sigh. "That’s the problem."
Mingyu looks confused. "Wait, I’m lost."
Irene pats his arm. "Sweetie, this is grown-up business." This makes Mingyu glare at him, jokingly pushing her sideways
Mingyu scowls. "I am grown!"
"You’re a puppy," Jeonghan corrects.
Meanwhile, Jihyo is still staring at you like you’ve lost your mind. "So you want him, but that’s the problem."
"Yes."
She stares harder. "You’re gonna have to give me more than that."
You huff, crossing your arms. "Look, it’s one thing to think a guy is hot. It’s another to actually want to do something about it. And it’s another thing entirely when that guy is Seungcheol."
Jeonghan hums. "Because he’s…?"
"Because he’s Seungcheol." You gesture vaguely. "Effortlessly hot. Stupidly charming. A literal menace who just gets whatever he wants without even trying."
Jihyo raises an eyebrow. "And that’s… bad?"
You exhale. "It’s bad because I don’t lose. And I will lose against him."
There’s a beat of silence. Then Jeonghan bursts out laughing.
"Oh, my God," he wheezes, clutching his stomach. "This is amazing."
Mingyu blinks. "I still don’t get it."
Irene sighs, shaking her head. "She’s afraid he’s gonna wreck her life."
Mingyu tilts his head. "That’s dramatic."
Jihyo just smirks. "So what’s your plan?"
You sigh. "I don’t have one." And that? That’s the real problem.
It happens when you least expect it. One second, you’re at the bar with Jihyo, fending off yet another round of questioning. The next Seungcheol is there.
"Can I borrow her for a second?" he asks smoothly, voice just low enough that only you can hear the real intent behind it.
Jihyo raises a brow, eyes flickering between the two of you. You can practically hear her thoughts. But before she can say anything, Seungcheol’s hand finds yours then he’s pulling you away.
You follow, weaving through the crowd until he tugs you into a small corner of the bar. A photobooth. You barely register it before he pulls the curtain shut behind you. The space is tiny. Cramped. You can feel the heat of him, too close, too intoxicating.
"You could’ve just asked to talk," you say, leaning against the side of the booth like you’re not at all affected.
Seungcheol smirks, eyes flickering down to your lips for just a second. "Where’s the fun in that?"
Your pulse jumps. "You like making things difficult, don’t you?"
"I could say the same about you."
You roll your eyes, but the way he’s looking at you—steady, knowing, amused as hell—makes it hard to breathe.
"So," he says, voice softer now, more serious, "why didn’t you text me?"
You exhale, meeting his gaze. "Because I knew you’d find a way to track me down anyway."
"You think you have me figured out?"
You tilt your head, letting the silence stretch before you answer. "I think you don’t like losing."
Seungcheol watches you for a beat. Then he laughs. It’s soft at first, then full and deep, shaking his shoulders as he shakes his head. "God," he mutters, "I should’ve found you sooner."
Your chest tightens. The photobooth timer starts blinking.
3…
His gaze dips—
2…
You don’t move away
1.
The camera clicks.So does something else between you.
The next day at work, you’re in a mood. You glare at your computer. You glare at your coffee. You glare at the innocent potted plant on your desk. And your friends notice.
Jeonghan doesn’t ask immediately. He waits until you’re both in line at the café, you’re scrolling through your phone, pretending you don’t notice him watching you.
"So," he says casually, "when are you seeing him again?"
You freeze. Your finger hovers over your screen. You don’t look at him, but you can feel his smirk. "I don’t know what you’re talking about."
Jeonghan hums. "Sure you don’t."
You take a deep breath. "Nothing happened."
"See, I know that’s a lie," he says, stepping forward as the line moves. "Because if nothing happened, you wouldn’t be acting like a walking existential crisis."
You scowl. "I am not—"
"—a walking existential crisis?" Jeonghan interrupts, raising a brow. "Oh, please. You’ve been glitching all morning."
You roll your eyes, finally looking at him. "You’re being dramatic."
"Am I?" He crosses his arms. "Because if I recall correctly, you’re the one who wanted him at first sight."
You click your tongue, shifting your weight. "And that’s the problem."
Jeonghan leans in slightly, intrigued. "Because?"
You sigh, running a hand through your hair. "Because I’m hot and cold about this, okay? One second, I want to see where this goes. The next, I’m ready to vanish into the void."
He blinks. "So you like him."
You hesitate. "I—"
Jeonghan’s smirk returns. "Oh, you so like him."
You glare. "I barely know him."
"But you want to," he points out.
You exhale, dragging a hand down your face. "That’s exactly the problem. I don’t get like this."
Jeonghan nods slowly, as if considering. "So what I’m hearing is… Seungcheol has you shook."
You groan, stepping forward as the line moves again. "I hate you."
"You love me."
"Debatable."
He chuckles, shaking his head. "Look, you can keep overthinking this, or you can just let yourself have some fun." He tilts his head. "Unless you’re scared?"
You bristle. "I’m not scared."
His smile widens. "Maybe. Or maybe you’ve just met your match." You stare at him, but before you can argue, the barista calls your order.
Jeonghan winks. "Think about it."
"This," you say flatly, "is why I hate most men."
Jeonghan snickers. "Oh, so you admit you don’t hate all men?"
You glare at him over the rim of your cup. "Unfortunately, some of you have managed to slip through the cracks."
He hums thoughtfully. "And would you say Seungcheol is one of those ‘slip through the cracks’ cases?"
You almost choke on your drink. "Jeonghan," you say warningly.
"Just saying," he muses, blowing on his coffee
You scoff. "Oh, please."
But then you hesitate because, damn it, he has a point. You liked Seungcheol immediately. One look, and you wanted him. And that never happens. It’s annoying. It’s unnerving. And the worst part? Seungcheol knows it.
It’s been a long day. You step out of the building, already thinking about what to make for dinner when you see him.
Seungcheol leaning against his car like he’s posing for a magazine, arms crossed, watching you with an amused tilt of his head. You stop in your tracks.
He smirks.
"Busy?" he asks, pushing off the car as you approach.
You narrow your eyes. "How did you know I was here?"
“Mingyu” you mutter under your breath how you’re going to kill the 6 foot tall man tomorrow. 
Seungcheol chuckles. "Be nice. I was gonna find you eventually."
You glare. "That’s not the point."
He tilts his head. "Then what is?"
You open your mouth then close it. Because, honestly? You’re not sure. Why does he keep coming back? And why the hell do you feel kind of excited that he’s here?
Seungcheol watches you wrestle with your thoughts, then grins. "You gonna invite me up?"
"To my apartment?"
"Where else?"
You fold your arms. "That’s bold."
He steps closer, just enough that you catch the faintest whiff of his cologne. "I don’t like wasting time."
Your heart skips. You should tell him to leave. You should ignore how good he looks in that damn suit. Instead you sigh. "Fine. But if you track me down again because of Mingyu, I’m sending both of you to hell."
Seungcheol grins. "Deal."
The entire drive back to your place is infuriating.
Seungcheol is smiling, smirking, even, like he just won some kind of game. Meanwhile, you’re glaring out the window, arms crossed, regretting every decision that led to this moment. When he finally pulls up to your building, you let out a deep breath, like you’ve just survived something mentally exhausting.
"You always this grumpy?" Seungcheol teases as he steps out of the car.
You shoot him a look. "You always this persistent?"
He just grins. You roll your eyes, leading him up to your apartment. The moment you step inside, you toe off your shoes, toss your bag onto the couch, and grab your phone.
"I’m ordering food," you announce, already scrolling through your go-to delivery app. Seungcheol follows you in, looking around like he’s taking mental notes.
"Nice place," he comments, settling onto your couch like he’s been here before.
You glance at him. "You say that like you weren’t planning to judge it."
And before you can stop yourself, you ask, "Why are you doing this?"
Seungcheol looks at you, head tilting slightly. "Doing what?"
You sigh, turning to fully face him. "This." You motion between the two of you. "Showing up. Finding my number. Tracking me down." For a second, he just watches you. Like he’s figuring something out. Then, he leans back, resting an arm over the couch.
"So this is why they call you the man hater."
You blink. "Excuse me?"
“You’re suspicious of a guy just because he likes you?"
You stare at him, trying to come up with a solid counterargument, something to wipe that smug look off his face.
"Weren’t you the one who approached me first?" Seungcheol asks, raising a brow.
You freeze because technically, yes. You were. That night at the bar, it was you who walked up to him. You who spoke first. You who, despite your reputation of never being impressed by men, took one look at him and wanted him.
And Seungcheol, the same man who apparently turns down women without a second thought, didn’t turn you away. And now? He’s here. Sitting on your couch. Acting like this is just the natural order of things.
"You’re twisting my words," you argue, folding your arms.
"Am I?"
You narrow your eyes. "I approached you because I was curious."
He tilts his head. "And now?"
Every interaction with him has been throwing you off your game. You’re used to being in control but with Seungcheol, it’s like every move he makes is intentional, and he’s too good at getting under your skin.
"You’re annoying," you finally say.
He smirks. "And yet, here I am."
You let out a slow exhale, rolling your eyes. "I should’ve ignored your number that night."
Seungcheol watches your expression shift, and something about it amuses him. "You always like this?"
"Like what?"
He leans forward slightly, resting his elbows on his knees. "Fighting yourself."
You stare at him. "I don’t—"
"You do," he interrupts, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. "You’re hot and cold with me, and I think it’s because you don’t like how much you want this."
You hate that he’s right.
"You are so—"
"Annoying?" He grins. "You’ve said."
"Why are you even interested?"
“I like you."
Your heart skips but you refuse to let him see that. So instead, you exhale, shaking your head as you tap at your phone. "You’re ridiculous."
"And you like that," he counters. You pretend you don’t hear him as you place the order.
The food arrives, and you both settle in to eat. Seungcheol sits across from you, comfortably digging into his meal like he belongs here. Like he hasn’t been pushing your buttons all night.
You, on the other hand? You’re still glaring.
He looks up mid-bite, noticing your expression, and smirks. "You always eat like you’re plotting a murder?"
You stab at your food with a little more force than necessary. "Just considering my options."
He chuckles, shaking his head. "You should really work on your intimidation tactics."
You huff. "They work on everyone else."
"Ah," he nods, chewing thoughtfully. "So I’m special."
You pause. Damn it. "That’s not what I—"
He holds up a hand, cutting you off. "Don’t worry, I get it. I’m persistent, irritatingly charming, and you don’t know what to do with that."
You scowl. "I know exactly what to do with that."
He raises a brow. "Yeah?"
"Yeah." You gesture to the door. "Kick you out." Seungcheol laughs. Full-bodied, genuine, like you’re the most entertaining thing he’s come across in a long time. You hate how nice it sounds.
"Okay," he says, still grinning. "I’ll leave—after we finish eating."
You squint. "You act like you’re doing me a favor."
He smirks. "Aren’t I?"
You refuse to dignify that with a response. Instead, you focus on your food, pointedly ignoring how Seungcheol watches you with that infuriatingly amused expression, like he already knows he’ll see you again.
After dinner you walk him to the door, arms crossed, your glare still very much in place. Seungcheol, in contrast, looks ridiculously satisfied, like he’s had the best night of his life just bothering you.
You stop at the door, unlocking it before turning to him with a deadpan expression.
"I changed my mind," you announce.
His brows lift slightly. "About what?"
"I don’t like you anymore."
Seungcheol grins. Like full-on, dimple-showing, teeth-flashing grin.
"That so?" he hums, stepping just a little closer, enough that you have to tilt your head to keep eye contact.
Your jaw tightens. "Yes."
He tilts his head slightly, watching you with the same entertained look he’s had all night.
"That’s a shame," he murmurs.
You cross your arms tighter. "Why?"
"Because," he leans in, voice dropping just enough to make your breath catch, "I still like you." He pulls back, opens the door himself, and steps out. 
"Goodnight," he says, like this is just routine now. Leaving you standing there, your heart beating entirely too fast, absolutely furious that he got the last word.
The next morning, you stomp out of your building and slide into Jeonghan’s car with more force than necessary.
Jeonghan barely glances at you before pulling out onto the street. "Good morning to you too."
You cross your arms, scowling at the window. "I hate him."
"Who?"
You don’t answer right away, mostly because admitting it feels like a loss. But then, under your breath "Seungcheol."
Jeonghan laughs. "You know, for someone who supposedly hates men, you’re really bad at resisting this one."
"I’m not—" You pause. "He’s just—annoying."
"And yet," Jeonghan drawls, "here you are, grumbling his name first thing in the morning."
You shoot him a glare. "Drive the damn car, Jeonghan."
He grins wider, turning up the radio. "Whatever you say, lovergirl."
You get to your desk, ready to start your day with the same level of annoyance you’ve carried since last night and then you see them. A bouquet. Right there. Sitting in the middle of your desk. Jeonghan, who’s still walking behind you, lets out a low whistle. "Oh, would you look at that?"
You drop your bag, snatch up the little card attached, and read it twice just to be sure your eyes aren’t deceiving you.
Try again. I think you still like me. —S.C.
Your eye twitches. Jeonghan, blatantly reading over your shoulder, bursts out laughing.
"Oh, this is amazing," he says, delighted. "I’ve never seen someone get under your skin this fast."
You slam the card down, glaring at the flowers like they’re the true enemy. "I hate him."
"You’ve mentioned." Jeonghan plucks one of the flowers from the bouquet, twirling it between his fingers. "So what are you gonna do?"
You grab the bouquet with way too much force, march over to Mingyu’s desk, and shove it onto his table. Mingyu, who was minding his own damn business, blinks in confusion. "Uh—?"
"They’re yours now," you say, turning away.
"But—"
"You’re welcome!" you call over your shoulder, marching back to your desk. Jeonghan watches the entire thing with an evil smirk.
"You really think that’s gonna stop him?" he muses.
You drop into your chair, arms crossed. "I don’t care."
Meanwhile, across town Seungcheol leans back in his chair, arms crossed, watching Joshua with a smirk.
"She gave them to Mingyu?"
Joshua, who had just finished relaying the entire story from Mingyu’s frantic texts, sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. "She didn’t even hesitate."
Seungcheol chuckles, clearly not deterred. "Figures."
Joshua gives him a look. "You sound way too happy about that."
"Because I am," Seungcheol says simply.
Joshua stares. "You just got rejected via floral delivery, and you’re smiling."
Seungcheol shrugs, completely unbothered. "She reacted."
Joshua raises a brow. "That’s your takeaway?"
"Of course," Seungcheol leans forward, tapping his fingers against his desk. "If she really didn’t care, she would’ve ignored them. But instead, she marched across the office, gave them to Mingyu, and made sure I’d hear about it."
Joshua squints. "That’s…a reach."
Seungcheol just grins. "Is it?"
Joshua sighs, already exhausted. "Okay, so what’s the plan now, lover boy?"
Seungcheol picks up his phone, scrolling through his contacts until he lands on the one he had personally gotten from Mingyu last week. Your phone buzzes on your desk, and you glance at it once. Then you freeze because there, bright as day, Seungcheol.
Your fingers twitch. You shouldn’t pick up. In fact, you should do the responsible thing and ignore him completely but then the call keeps ringing, like he knows you’re staring at it, like he’s waiting for you to break.
You almost ignore it..Almost. With an annoyed huff, you snatch up the phone and answer.
"What."
A low chuckle greets you from the other end. "That’s no way to greet your boyfriend."
Your entire body jerks. "Excuse me?"
"Ah," Seungcheol hums, clearly amused. "Too soon?"
"Way too soon," you deadpan. "And completely delusional."
"And yet, here you are, answering my call."
Your eye twitches. "Do you want something, or are you just here to waste my time?"
"Both," he admits easily.
You resist the urge to throw your phone. "Seungcheol."
"Fine, fine," he laughs. "Just wanted to check if my flowers got delivered."
You glare at nothing. "Oh, they did."
"And?"
"And they now belong to Mingyu." There’s a beat of silence then he’s laughing. And you hate it, you hate how good it sounded. 
“You’re so cute when you’re difficult."
You hang up immediately and then proceed to glare at your phone like it’s personally betrayed you. Across the room, Jeonghan watches your entire reaction unfold, smirk growing wider by the second.
"So," he drawls, "how’s your boyfriend?"
You launch a stress ball at his head.
Later that night, Jeonghan is sprawled out on your couch, one arm slung over his face as he lazily kicks at the air.
"You got any more of those fancy chips?" he asks.
You barely glance up from your phone. "Pantry."
"Ugh. Too far."
"You have legs."
He groans dramatically, but he doesn’t move. You roll your eyes and keep scrolling, ignoring him—until his voice turns serious.
"Alright," he says, sitting up. "All jokes aside—what’s going on?"
You pause, side-eyeing him. "What?"
Jeonghan leans forward, elbows on his knees, studying you in a way that makes you shift uncomfortably.
"You said it yourself that you wanted him," he says, voice softer now. "So why are you acting like this?"
Because you’ve been here before. Because the last time you really liked someone, you got your hopes up, and it all went to shit. Because you’ve learned the hard way that people say one thing and do another, that words mean nothing without action.
Jeonghan knows this. He’s been there through it all—through the flings, the almost-relationships, the guys who were great until they weren’t. He was there when you decided you were done trying, when you shrugged off love like it was an optional extra, not something you needed.
Now, he’s watching you like he’s seeing through you.
"You’re scared," he says simply.
You scoff. "I am not—"
"You are," he cuts in. "And I get it. But you can’t keep pushing people away just because they might disappoint you."
You bite your lip, looking away.
"Seungcheol isn’t them," Jeonghan continues. "And I don’t think he’s gonna give up just because you’re being difficult."
"...Maybe he should."
Jeonghan chuckles, but it’s not mocking. "Too bad for you, I don’t think he will."
You scoff, crossing your arms. "He will."
Jeonghan raises a brow, amused. "You sure about that?"
"Yes," you say firmly. "He’s rich, good-looking, and clearly used to getting what he wants. Guys like him don’t chase for long. The second I make it too much work, he’ll move on."
Jeonghan just smirks, shaking his head. "That’s cute. You think you’re hard to want."
You glare. "Don’t analyze me. I am not dealing with another guy who’s all interest at first and then disappears the moment things get real."
Jeonghan hums, watching you for a moment. Then, with a knowing glint in his eyes, he asks, "So if he doesn’t disappear?"
You blink.
"If he doesn’t give up," Jeonghan says, leaning closer. "If he keeps showing up, keeps proving you wrong—then what?"
You press your lips together, refusing to answer. Because you don’t know.
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Jeonghan’s words replay in your head for the next couple of days. You try to brush them off, but they stick. if he doesn’t give up, then what?
But then, Seungcheol stops contacting you.No texts. No calls. No annoying flower deliveries. And in your mind, you’re like, See? I was right.
You told Jeonghan exactly how this would go. Guys like Seungcheol don’t chase for long. They get bored, they move on, they—
Knock, knock.
Your head snaps toward the door, heart inexplicably jumping. It’s late. You’re already in pajamas, wrapped in a blanket on your couch, halfway through a show you weren’t even paying attention to. The knocking comes again.
Slowly, you get up and pull open the door and there he is.
Seungcheol stands in front of you, looking annoyingly good despite the slight exhaustion in his eyes. He’s wearing a dark coat over a fitted sweater, and there’s an expensive-looking suitcase at his feet.
And in his hand a snow globe.
You blink. "What…?"
"Hey," he says, Just got back from a business trip."
You stare at him. "A business trip."
"Yeah." He lifts the snow globe slightly. "Paris.".
"You brought me a souvenir?"
Seungcheol smirks. "What, you think I’d go all the way to Paris and not bring you something?"
"I—" You pause, suddenly feeling very warm despite the cold draft from the open door. "I just—"
"You thought I gave up," he says simply.
Your stomach flips. You cross your arms, standing a little straighter. "Maybe."
For a second, neither of you say anything. Then, before your brain can catch up, you reach out slow, hesitant and take the snow globe from his hand.
"...Thanks," you mumble.
Seungcheol grins. "You’re welcome."
You step aside, wordlessly letting him in. Seungcheol doesn’t hesitate, walking past you like he belongs there. 
"Why do you always look like you want to fight me?" he asks, amused.
"I don’t," you say flatly.
"You do," he counters, dropping onto your couch like it’s his. "You’ve been glaring at me since the day we met."
You cross your arms. "Maybe it’s just my face."
"It’s cute."
You narrow your eyes. "Don’t start."
Seungcheol laughs, stretching out comfortably. "You gonna offer me a drink or just keep staring at me?"
You inhale sharply, fighting the urge to throw him out. Instead, you turn and march into the kitchen, grabbing two glasses of water. When you return, he’s still lounging on your couch, completely at home.
You set his glass down with a little too much force. "Here."
Seungcheol picks it up, giving you a slow, knowing look. "You’re really bad at this," he says.
"At what?"
"Letting yourself like me." You almost choke on your own water. And Seungcheol? He just smiles.
He takes a slow sip of his water, watching you over the rim of the glass like he’s studying you. Then, like he can read your mind, he says, "Before you start spiraling—I didn’t text because I was busy. Meetings from morning to night, different time zones, clients to entertain. I barely slept, let alone had time to talk."
You blink. "I didn’t ask," you say, defensive.
He smirks. "Then don’t overthink."
You open your mouth to argue because you were not overthinking, thank you very much—but he just keeps going.
"I was in Paris for four days. Mostly business, but I had a few hours to walk around. Thought about you when I saw that snow globe."
Your stomach flips against your will. You grip your glass tighter. "You—what?"
"I thought you’d like it," he says simply. "Or maybe you'd just glare at it. Either way, it reminded me of you."
You stare at him, lips parting slightly because what the hell is he even saying? Because he says it like it’s not a big deal. Like it’s normal to have you on his mind while he’s halfway across the world. So, naturally, you do what you do best—deflect.
"You just showed up at my place," you say, voice carefully flat. "What if I wasn’t home?"
Seungcheol grins. "Then I’d have waited."
"Like a stalker?"
"Like a guy who wants to see you."
Your brain short-circuits.You scramble for something anything to say, but he beats you to it.
"You really don’t get it, do you?"
You frown. "Get what?"
He leans forward, setting his glass down on the coffee table, and your whole body tenses when he holds your gaze. "I don’t do things halfway," he says. "I wanted you from the start. That hasn’t changed."
And suddenly, you’re overthinking again. You fold your arms across your chest, keeping your expression carefully neutral. "You're just saying that because you like the chase."
Seungcheol raises an eyebrow, leaning back slightly. "And you're saying that because you want me to think you're still a man hater."
"Excuse me?" you say, narrowing your eyes.
He shrugs, completely unfazed. "You keep acting like you don’t care, like you’re waiting for me to mess up so you can say ‘See? I told you so.’ But you’re just trying to protect yourself."
He’s too damn perceptive. Too calm, too confident in the way he calls you out.
"You don’t know what you’re talking about," you mutter, looking away.
Seungcheol scoffs. "I do, actually."
He leans forward again, resting his elbows on his knees. "You liked me the second you saw me," he says, voice lower now, smoother. "And that scared the hell out of you."
Your breath catches because he’s right. You hate that he’s right. And the worst part? He sees it. You don’t answer. That's when Seungcheol does something you don’t expect. He stands up. And just like that, the whole atmosphere shifts. The teasing glint in his eyes is gone, replaced with something steadier. Something serious.
"If you don’t want me here, say the word and I’ll leave."
You swallow hard. Your fingers tighten around the edge of your sweater. Because this is it. The out you’ve been waiting for. The chance to end this before you get in too deep.
Your voice is quieter than you intend when you say, "If I do, will you leave?"
Seungcheol watches you, his gaze unwavering. "Yes." You know he’s telling the truth. He’s not the kind of guy to stick around where he isn’t wanted.
"You won’t fight for it?" you ask, hating how vulnerable the words sound.
A small, knowing smile tugs at the corner of his lips. "I already am."
Your breath catches because damn him. Damn him for saying things like that. Damn him for not pushing, not forcing, just waiting. 
So instead, you exhale, looking away. "Sit down, you’re making me nervous."
Seungcheol smiles and just like that, the tension cracks.
"Yes, ma’am," he teases, sinking back onto the couch like he owns the place.
You roll your eyes, but the corner of your lips betrays you—a slight, reluctant twitch. He sees it, of course. And you don’t miss the satisfied look on his face when he does.
A few days later, Mingyu ruins everything.
“We should go out for drinks,” he says, like it’s just a casual suggestion and not a trap. And like idiots, you all agree. You don’t think anything of it until "By the way," Mingyu adds, far too casually, "I invited Seungcheol."
You freeze.
Mingyu grins, oblivious to the murderous intent in your eyes. "You don’t mind, right?"
Jeonghan snickers. Irene and Jihyo exchange looks.
"Why would she mind?" Irene asks, ever the instigator.
"You’re all insufferable," you mutter, grabbing your drink and pretending you’re unaffected.
You’re going to ignore him. You’re going to sit with your friends, drink, and not think about him. It’s a solid plan.
Then he walks in.
And suddenly, your plan evaporates.
Seungcheol is unfair. Black button-up, sleeves rolled up to his forearms, looking effortlessly good in the worst possible way. He steps into the bar with Joshua beside him, scanning the room and then his eyes land on you.
You should play it cool. Pretend to be mad at him. Hold onto your last shred of self-respect but the moment you see him, you walk straight up to him, ignoring the way your friends watch with poorly concealed amusement.
Seungcheol’s lips twitch, like he was expecting this. "Hi."
You scowl. "I hate you."
He grins. "You said that last time. Didn’t sound very convincing then either."
You open your mouth to argue—but you don’t. Because damn it, you don’t hate him at all. So you stare at him, arms crossed, and say, “What, you’re too busy now?”
His smirk deepens. “Didn’t know you’d miss me so much.”
You scoff. “I didn’t say that.”
“But you implied it.”
Your eyes narrow. “You’re deflecting.”
He shrugs, completely unbothered. “I’ve been busy.”
“Oh, so you admit it?”
Seungcheol tilts his head, amused. “Didn’t I text you?”
Your lips press together. Okay, fair point. He did text. A few times.
A "How was your day?"A "Don’t overthink too much." 
Still, you lift your chin. “Texts aren’t the same.”
His brow arches. “So you’re saying you wanted to see me?”
 “That is absolutely not what I said.”
Seungcheol just laughs. “But it’s what you meant.”
“Oh my god, I hate you.”
His grin is downright infuriating. “You keep saying that, but I don’t think you mean it.”
You spin on your heel. “I’m leaving.”
Seungcheol just laughs, completely unbothered, like he already knows you don’t mean it. He slides into the seat beside you like it’s the most natural thing in the world. 
“I was busy because of work,” he murmurs, voice smooth, almost apologetic—but not quite. “Wanted to come see you, but I figured you’d be tired after work, too.”
Your eyes narrow. “That’s your excuse?”
He tilts his head, smirking. “It’s the truth.”
You glare harder, hoping it’ll somehow make him squirm. It doesn’t. He just watches you, the corner of his mouth twitching like he’s fighting back a laugh.
“So considerate of you,” you say dryly.
He hums. “I try.” Seungcheol, of course, takes that as his cue to get comfortable. He leans back, stretching his arm along the back of the booth—not quite touching you, but close enough.
“You’re still mad,” he observes, sounding entirely too entertained.
“No,” you deadpan. “I’m thrilled.”
Seungcheol laughs under his breath. “You’re cute when you sulk.”
Your head snaps toward him, eyes burning with fresh irritation. “I am not sulking.”
He just grins. “Whatever you say.”
You step out onto the balcony, the night air cool against your skin as you take a deep breath. You just need a moment, one single moment to yourself. Of course, that’s impossible when Seungcheol is involved.
The door clicks shut behind you, and you don’t even have to turn around to know it’s him. You sigh, rubbing your temples. “Don’t mind me. I’ll sulk on my own.”
Seungcheol hums as he leans against the railing beside you. “Nah, can’t let that happen.”
You throw him a glare. “And why not?”
He shrugs, watching the city lights with an infuriatingly calm expression. “I’d feel bad.”
You scoff. “Oh, now you feel bad?”
“I’ve always felt bad.”
“You don’t look like you do.”
He tilts his head toward you, smiling slightly. “Alright, what do you want, then?”
You exhale, glancing away. The truth sits heavy on your tongue, but you don’t say it. You’re still you, after all. Instead, you mutter, “For you to stop being annoying.”
A breeze drifts between you, carrying the sounds of laughter from inside. For a second, neither of you speak. Then Seungcheol nudges your arm lightly. “You’re really not gonna admit you missed me, huh?”
You don’t say anything.
His smirk softens into something else. Something dangerous. “I can wait.” He exhales, watching you carefully. The smirk fades, replaced by something quieter. something real.
Then he says it.
“I missed you.”
The words slip out so casually, so effortlessly, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Your fingers tighten around the railing. Your brain stalls. Your heart does this stupid little flip in your chest. You finally turn to face him, none of the usual teasing or frustration in your expression is just seriousness.
“If it’s going to be like this,” you say, voice steady, “you disappear for days, then coming back like nothing happened then it’s not going to work.”
Seungcheol’s smirk fades completely. He studies you, really looks at you, and you can tell he understands that you’re not just saying this to pick a fight.
He exhales, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s not like that.”
“Isn’t it?” You cross your arms. “You come and then go, then you just show up out of nowhere. Do you expect me to just—” You shake your head. “I don’t play games, Seungcheol.”
“I know,” he says immediately. “I know you don’t.”
You sigh. “Then what are we doing?”
He’s quiet for a moment. Then, carefully, “I didn’t think you’d want me to check in like that.”
You blink. “Why wouldn’t I?”
He hesitates. “Because you act like you don’t care half the time.” That stings. Not because he’s wrong, but because he’s right.
You inhale sharply. “That’s just how I am.”
“I know,” he says again, softer this time. “But if I’m going to try with you, I don’t want to be another person you expect to leave.”
Seungcheol holds your gaze, unwavering. “So tell me what you want. What you really want.”
For the first time since this started, you don’t have a comeback. You suddenly feel the urge to leave.
Seungcheol’s words sit heavy in your chest—you act like you don’t care half the time. It stung more than you wanted to admit, and now the whole night feels ruined.
“I’m heading out,” you say abruptly, turning on your heel.
You return inside, Seungcheol following behind you. Jeonghan, ever the observant one, catches on immediately. “Let’s go home yea?” he says, grabbing his coat. He doesn’t ask questions, doesn’t press. Just sticks by your side, because he knows you.
Mingyu frowns. “Already? But we just—”
“Let her go,” Seungcheol says. His voice is unreadable. You don’t look back. Jeonghan walks you out, calls a ride, and when you’re finally inside the car, he leans back with a sigh.
“You gonna tell me what happened?”
You stare out the window. “No.”
He hums, not pushing further. Instead, when you get home, he stays. Puts on a random movie, hands you a blanket, and lets you sit in silence.
Because Jeonghan knows you’ll talk when you’re ready. He doesn’t look at you right away. He stays focused on the movie, lthen he hears it.
A sniffle.
It’s quiet, barely there, but Jeonghan notices everything.
He doesn’t immediately react, doesn’t turn his head or ask if you’re okay, because he knows you. Knows that if he does, you’ll shut down completely.
“I think I’m screwing it up.”
Jeonghan doesn’t even blink. “With Seungcheol?”
You nod.
“Yeah,” he says, blowing on his own tea. “I figured.”
You furrow your brows. “How?”
He snorts. “Because you’re you.” You glare at him again, but he just drives. Eyes still on the road
“I’m serious,”
“So am I,” he says easily. “You’re panicking because this is probably the first time in a long time that you actually like someone. And instead of dealing with it like a normal person, you’re, well—”
“Ruining it?”
Jeonghan shrugs. “Self-sabotaging. But close enough.”
“Great.”
Jeonghan watches you for a moment. Then, softer this time “What did he say to make you leave?”
You hesitate. Then, voice barely above a whisper “That I act like I don’t care.”
“Well, he’s not wrong.”
You snap your head toward him, eyes wide. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.”
You scowl, ready to argue, but then the truth of it hits you.
And maybe that’s why it hurt so much. Because Seungcheol wasn’t wrong. Because you do act like you don’t care, even when you do. Because this whole time, you’ve been pushing and pulling, running hot and cold, and yet
Yet, he’s still here. Still choosing you. The realization makes your chest feel uncomfortably tight.
So you do what you always do when it gets too much. You don’t reach out.
Not the next day. Not the day after that. You tell yourself it’s for the best. That it’s easier this way. That Seungcheol will eventually get the hint and move on.
But then why do you feel like absolute shit?
You go through the motions—work, home, repeat—but there’s this persistent weight in your chest that refuses to go away.
It’s easy to avoid Seungcheol, at least. He works across town, and it’s not like you run in the same circles outside of Mingyu dragging him along. Still. You hate how aware you are of his absence. It’s ridiculous, really. You’ve only known him for a few months, but somehow, he’s already made himself at home in your thoughts.
You wonder if he’s given up on you yet. If he’s decided you’re not worth the effort. The thought makes you feel worse.
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You almost walk right past him.
Almost.
“Hey.”
Your steps falter. You take a slow breath before turning to him. He’s standing by the entrance of your building, hands in his pockets, looking at you like he’s been waiting.
You scoff. “Oh. Now you know me?”
Seungcheol exhales sharply, shaking his head. “Don’t do that.”
You don’t even know what exactly you’re doing, but you’re already annoyed. “Do what?”
He gives you a flat look. “Push me away.”
You cross your arms. “Maybe you should take the hint, then.”
Seungcheol steps forward. “You don’t want that.”
You step back. “I don’t?”
“You don’t.” You hate that he’s right. That he can see it. That it’s written all over your face no matter how hard you try to deny it and it frustrates you. More than it should.
“Look, Seungcheol,” you sigh, voice heavy with exhaustion. “You can’t just disappear for days and then show up like—”
“Like what?” he interrupts. “Like I actually give a damn about you?” You flinch. It’s not even what he said. It’s how he said it. The sincerity in his voice. The quiet frustration.
You look away. “I didn’t ask you to.”
He laughs under his breath. “Yeah. That’s the problem, isn’t it?”
You hate the way he’s looking at you. Like he knows. Like he’s waiting for you to stop fighting him. You shake your head. “You should go.”
But Seungcheol doesn’t move. Instead, he tilts his head, studying you.  “Do you want me to?”
The answer is no but you don’t say it. You can’t stand the way he looks at you, like he’s already figured you out. Like he knows every excuse, every defense mechanism, every wall you put up before you even have the chance to throw them at him.
So you do what you do best. You push.
"Let’s just go back to thinking I don’t care." The words taste bitter, but you swallow them down, turning on your heel before he can say anything else.
You walk away.
One step.
Two.
Three.
You expect him to stop you. To grab your wrist. To call your name again. To say something but he doesn’t.
The air is heavy with everything unsaid, with everything you’re choosing to leave behind. And yet the farther you get, the harder it is to breathe. Your own words echo in your head, louder and louder, until you almost want to take them back.
Almost.
But you don’t.
Because that would mean admitting that he’s right. That you don’t actually want him to leave. That you’ve just been pushing him away because it’s easier than facing what’s really scaring you.
Because if you admit that you care—really, really care—then that means he has the power to hurt you.
And you’re not sure if you can survive that again.
And Seungcheol?
He lets you go.
The next day Jeonghan doesn’t even need to say anything. The moment he sees you step out of your apartment building, he knows. Your eyes are puffy, your hair is a mess, and you look like you barely got any sleep. Like hell, basically.
"So, rough night?" he asks, starting the car. You grunt in response, which tells him enough.
"You wanna talk about it, or should I just let you wallow in silence until you eventually explode?"
"Silence."
"Got it."
The drive is quiet, but Jeonghan sneaks glances at you every now and then. He’s been with you long enough to recognize when you’re doing it again. The overthinking. The self-sabotaging. The pushing away before you can get hurt.
He knows you want Seungcheol. He knows you care. And he knows that you’re terrified of letting yourself have something good.
So when he finally pulls into the parking lot and parks the car, he doesn’t unlock the doors right away. Instead, he turns to you, voice softer this time.
"You look miserable."
"Wow, thanks."
"I mean it. You look like you barely slept. You’re doing that thing where you overthink yourself into a corner and decide for yourself that you’re better off alone before anyone can prove you wrong."
You hate how accurate that is. "I don’t wanna talk about it, Hannie."
"Fine." He unlocks the doors. "But at some point, you’re gonna have to."
You sigh and grab your bag, stepping out of the car. But as you walk toward the building, Jeonghan calls after you.
"Just answer me one thing—if he calls, are you gonna pick up?"
You pause. The fact that you even hesitate tells him everything. Jeonghan watches you, waiting. Maybe hoping. But when you finally speak, your voice is so quiet.
“No.”
It’s not stubborn. It’s not defensive. It’s not even angry. It’s just… defeated. Like every last bit of fight has already drained out of you.
And that is what makes Jeonghan shut up. 
So, even though it kills him to see you like this, he sighs and just says, “Alright. Dropped.”
But Jeonghan doesn’t move right away. He just sits there in the driver’s seat, watching you disappear through the doors. And for the first time in a long time, he wonders if this time—with Seungcheol—maybe you’re making a mistake.
Jeonghan, Jihyo, Mingyu, and Irene are already a few drinks in when Mingyu suddenly stiffens, his eyes narrowing toward the entrance of the bar.
“Oh, shit.”
Jihyo follows his gaze and lets out a low whistle. “Well, well, well. Look who it is.”
Jeonghan doesn’t even need to look. He already knows. Joshua Hong walks in first, smiling as he exchanges greetings with someone at the bar.
And right behind him? Choi Seungcheol.
It’s been 2 weeks and Seungcheol looks… the same. Maybe a little tired, but still him. The group watches as he follows Joshua toward a table, not even glancing their way.
“Are we going to talk to them?” Irene asks, swirling her drink.
“Should we?” Mingyu hesitates.
Jeonghan sighs, rubbing his temples. He’s been waiting for something like this to happen. Because of course it would. The universe wouldn’t let things be that easy.
Jeonghan exhales, slow and measured, before tossing back the rest of his drink.
“I’ll go.”
Jihyo raises an eyebrow. “You sure?”
Jeonghan shrugs as he pushes back his chair. “Someone has to.”
Mingyu shifts in his seat. “Want me to—”
“No,” Jeonghan cuts him off, shaking his head. “If it’s just me, he won’t feel cornered.”
They don’t argue. They know Jeonghan well enough to trust him with this. So, with one last glance at the others, Jeonghan straightens his shirt and makes his way across the bar.
“Joshua.”
Joshua turns first, eyebrows lifting in surprise before his lips pull into a smile. “Jeonghan! What a coincidence.”
Seungcheol looks up then, mid-sip of his drink, and his expression flickers—just for a second—before smoothing out. Jeonghan pulls out a chair and sits without asking.
Joshua leans forward, propping his chin on his hand. “Didn’t think I’d be seeing you tonight. The others here too?”
Jeonghan ignores the question and turns to Seungcheol instead. “You doing alright?”
Seungcheol stares at him, unreadable. “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”
Jeonghan hums, tapping his fingers against the table. “Dunno. Just seems like you haven’t been around much lately.”
Joshua looks between them, lips twitching, but he wisely keeps quiet.
Seungcheol finally exhales, setting his drink down. “Is this about—”
“Of course it’s about her.” Jeonghan doesn’t even let him finish. “You think we wouldn’t notice?”
Seungcheol presses his lips into a thin line.
Jeonghan tilts his head. “She’s been avoiding everything that even remotely reminds her of you. And she’s stubborn as hell, but I know her. She’s not okay.”
Seungcheol’s grip tightens on his glass.
Joshua sighs, leaning back in his chair. “This is why I told you to just talk to her already.”
Seungcheol runs a hand down his face, clearly frustrated. “And say what?”
Jeonghan narrows his eyes. “Say you’re sorry. Say you care. Say literally anything, because she’s convinced herself you don’t.”
Seungcheol exhales sharply. “That’s not—” He stops himself, shaking his head. “She told me to leave.”
“She tells everyone to leave,” Jeonghan deadpans. “And she’s always surprised when they actually do.”
Seungcheol goes quiet. Jeonghan leans forward, voice steady but firm. “If you don’t care, then stay away. But if you do? Do something. Because right now, all you’re doing is proving her right.”
Seungcheol stares down at his drink. Jeonghan watches him, waiting.
And then, after a long moment Seungcheol stands.
Joshua blinks. “Oh? We’re going now?” Seungcheol ignores him, pulling his wallet out and throwing some cash on the table. Then, finally, he turns to Jeonghan.
“Where is she?”
Jeonghan tried calling again. Straight to voicemail.
He frowned. “She’s not answering.”
Seungcheol’s jaw clenched. “Is she home?”
“I don’t know,” Jeonghan muttered, already pulling up your shared location—but of course, it was off.
Joshua exhaled through his nose. “Maybe she’s asleep?”
Jeonghan shook his head. “She always leaves her phone on, even if she’s mad. If she’s not answering, it means she either doesn’t want to be found or—” He stops himself, lips pressing into a thin line. Seungcheol didn’t need him to finish the sentence. His hands curled into fists.
“Where would she go?” he asked, voice tight.
Jeonghan exchanged a look with Mingyu, who had come over after noticing their conversation.
Mingyu sighed. “There’s a place. She used to go there when she needed to clear her head.”
Seungcheol didn’t waste time asking more. “Where?”
Mingyu hesitated, just for a second. Then, seeing the way Seungcheol was barely holding himself together, he pulled out his phone and sent the location.
“Don’t mess this up,” Mingyu muttered.
Seungcheol was already heading for the door. He wasn’t sure what he expected when he got there, but an old bookstore tucked into a quiet street wasn’t it. The lights inside were dim and warm, casting a soft glow through the large windows. He pushed the door open, the bell above jingling softly. 
An old woman, sitting behind the counter, looked up. She peered at him through her glasses, eyes sharp despite her gentle smile.
“You must be the one,” she said simply.
Seungcheol blinked. “Excuse me?”
The old woman hummed, nodding toward the back. “She’s here. Been here all day.”
He followed her gaze and, sure enough, there you were—curled up in one of the armchairs near the back, a book resting on your lap, though you weren’t reading it. Instead, you were staring out the window, lost in thought.
You felt his presence before you saw him. Maybe it was the way the air shifted, or maybe you had been waiting for him all along, but when he stopped in front of you, you weren’t surprised.
“You’re a hard person to find,” he said quietly.
You closed the book in your lap, fingers tracing the edges of the cover. “Didn’t realize I was supposed to be found.”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Why didn’t you tell anyone where you were?”
You shrugged. “Didn’t feel like talking.”
Seungcheol crouched down so he was eye level with you. “Are you okay?”
You looked at him then, really looked at him. His eyes were searching, his face unreadable. And for some reason, that made something in your chest tighten.
“I don’t know,” you admitted.
He exhaled softly. “Can I sit?”
You didn’t answer, but you moved your legs so there was space on the other armchair beside you. He took the silent invitation, settling in.
For a while, neither of you spoke. The quiet hum of the bookstore surrounded you.
Finally, Seungcheol broke the silence. “Why did you run?”
You frowned. “I didn’t run.”
He gave you a look. “You disappeared. No one could reach you. That’s running.”
You sighed, leaning your head back against the chair. “I just needed time.”
“To do what?”
“To think,” you muttered.
Seungcheol tilted his head, watching you closely. “And?”
You hesitated, fingers tightening around the book. “And I don’t know what to do with you.”
He let out a small chuckle. “I get that a lot.”
“I’m serious.”
His expression softened. “So am I.”
You sighed, feeling the weight of everything pressing down on you. “I don’t know how to do this, Seungcheol. I don’t know how to trust that this won’t end up like before.”
He was quiet for a moment. Then, he said, “I’m not whoever hurt you.”
You swallowed. “I know that.”
“Do you?” His voice was gentle, but firm. “Because it seems like you’re punishing me for something I didn’t do.”
Your chest ached. “It’s not that simple.”
“I know,” he said. “But I need you to at least give me a chance.” You stared at him, searching for any hint of dishonesty. But all you found was sincerity.
The lump in your throat grew. “And if I can’t?”
“Then I’ll wait.”
You closed your eyes, exhaling shakily. “You make it sound so easy.”
He smiled, though there was something sad in it. “It’s not. But I think you’re worth it.”
Your heart stumbled over itself. For the first time in a long time, you didn’t know what to say.
The old lady approached with slow, deliberate steps, her sharp gaze flicking between you and Seungcheol. She had seen you come in and out of this bookstore too many times, always with a heavy heart.
“So,” she said, arms crossing over her chest. “Is this the boy that’s been making you cry?”
You inhaled deeply, forcing a small smile as you shook your head. “All of them do.”
She clicked her tongue, giving Seungcheol a pointed look before patting your shoulder. “Men,” she muttered before walking off, leaving the two of you in tense silence. Seungcheol didn’t speak for a long moment. You knew he was looking at you, but you refused to meet his eyes.
Then, finally, in a quiet voice, he asked, “Did I really make you cry?”
You swallowed, keeping your gaze on the book in your lap. “Why do you care?”
His jaw tensed. “Because I didn’t want to.”
A bitter chuckle slipped out. “That’s funny,” you said, glancing at him now. “Because I remember you saying that I don’t care.”
Seungcheol exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. “I was angry.”
You nodded slowly, lips pressing together. “So what do you want from me?”
His brows furrowed. “What?”
You turned fully toward him now, frustration bubbling up again. “What do you want, Seungcheol? You say you’ll wait, but for what? You keep coming back even when I push you away. What are you waiting for?”
He stared at you, something flickering behind his eyes. “You.”
You let out a hollow laugh. “You don’t even know me.”
“Yes, I do,” he shot back. “I know you act like you don’t care because you’re afraid. I know you run before anyone gets the chance to hurt you. And I know you like me.”
Your breath hitched.
He leaned in slightly, voice dropping lower. “That’s why you’re trying so hard to convince yourself that I’ll leave.”
You clenched your jaw. “You will.”
Seungcheol exhaled, shaking his head. “I won’t.”
You opened your mouth to argue again, but before you could, another voice interrupted.
“There you are.” You both turned to see Jeonghan standing by the entrance of the bookstore, arms crossed, an unreadable expression on his face. “I was looking for you.”
Jeonghan’s gaze softened as he looked at you. “Come on,” he said gently. “Let’s go.”
You hesitated, glancing at Seungcheol, whose jaw was now clenched.
Jeonghan sighed, looking between the two of you. “You need space,” he said simply. Then, to Seungcheol, he added, “Give it to her.” Seungcheol didn’t respond immediately. His gaze stayed locked on you, searching, waiting but you didn’t say anything.
Finally, he exhaled and stood. “I’ll wait.”
You hated that those words made your chest tighten. Without another glance, you followed Jeonghan out of the bookstore, leaving Seungcheol behind.
The moment you stepped out of the bookstore, Jeonghan let out a heavy sigh.
“Don’t,” you muttered, already knowing what was coming.
“I didn’t say anything yet,” he shot back, but the look he gave you was enough.
You sighed, rubbing your temples. “Thanks for coming to get me.”
“Oh, don’t thank me,” he said, crossing his arms. “Because now I am going to lecture you.”
You groaned. “Jeonghan—”
“No, listen to me.” His tone was sharper than usual, firm in a way that made you stop walking. “You keep doing this thing where you push people away the second they get too close. And I get it, I do. You don’t want to get hurt. But you are the one hurting yourself.”
Your breath caught, but you said nothing.
Jeonghan huffed. “You like him,” he stated, like it was a fact. “And I know you like him because you’re acting like this.”
You scoffed. “That makes no sense.”
He gave you a pointed look. “It does when it’s you.”
You exhaled slowly, looking away. “He’ll leave.”
“And what if he doesn’t?” Jeonghan challenged. “Are you really going to throw this away just because you think he might leave?”
You pressed your lips together. “You don’t understand.”
Jeonghan let out a humorless laugh. “Oh, I do. Because I’ve watched you do this over and over again. And I didn’t say anything before because, honestly? Most of those guys weren’t worth it.”
You frowned. “And you think he is?”
Jeonghan tilted his head. “Don’t you? Look, if you really don’t want him, then fine. Walk away. But if you do want him—even just a little—then stop making it so hard for yourself.”
You swallowed, your throat suddenly tight.
Jeonghan softened, placing a hand on your shoulder. “Just think about it, alright?”
You didn’t respond. You weren’t sure if you could so you just nodded, and Jeonghan let it go. For now.
Come morning the next day. Seungcheol sat across from Jeonghan, arms crossed as he studied him. He had been skeptical from the start—why Jeonghan always knew exactly what to say to you, why you let him in when you pushed everyone else away.
“You know a lot about her,” Seungcheol said, voice laced with suspicion. “More than just a friend would.”
Jeonghan smirked, stirring his coffee lazily. “That’s because we’re not just friends.”
Seungcheol’s grip on his cup tightened slightly. He wasn’t sure why that statement irritated him so much, but it did. “Then what are you?”
Jeonghan glanced up at him, watching his reaction carefully before finally saying it.
“She’s my stepsister.”
“What?”
Jeonghan leaned back in his chair, sighing like this conversation was long overdue. “Her dad left when she was a kid. It was ugly—messed her up. My dad married her mom when we were in our teens, and suddenly, we were family.”
It made sense now. Why you and Jeonghan were inseparable, why he always seemed to understand you in a way no one else did.
“She doesn’t talk about it,” Jeonghan continued, voice quieter now. “Not to anyone. She pretends it doesn’t affect her, but it does. It’s why she is the way she is. Why she pushes people away before they get too close.”
Seungcheol exhaled, leaning back in his seat. “And you’re telling me this because…?”
Jeonghan met his gaze, all traces of amusement gone. “Because if you’re serious about her, you need to know what you’re up against.”
Now, he understood just how much he had to fight for you. Seungcheol stayed quiet, his mind replaying every interaction he’d had with you. The push and pull, the way you shut him out just when he thought he was getting close. Now, it all made sense.
Jeonghan sighed, watching him carefully before speaking again.
“It’s hard to love her less once you get to know her more.”
Seungcheol’s gaze snapped up, meeting Jeonghan’s knowing eyes.
“That’s why she keeps people at arm’s length,” Jeonghan continued. “Because she knows it too. She’s terrified of people staying just long enough to leave.”
Seungcheol exhaled sharply. “And you think I’m just like everyone else?”
Jeonghan smirked, but there was something softer behind it. “I think you’re different. That’s why she’s this scared.”
Seungcheol didn’t sleep much that night.
Jeonghan’s words stayed with him, looping in his mind until he couldn’t ignore them anymore. You weren’t just pushing him away because you wanted to—you were pushing him away because you were scared. Because you expected him to leave.
And if there was one thing Seungcheol hated, it was being predictable.
The next day, he found himself outside your office again, leaning against his car with his arms crossed. He knew your schedule well enough by now, and when he saw you stepping out, he straightened.
You stopped in your tracks the moment you saw him. 
“What are you doing here?” Your voice was flat, but Seungcheol could hear the exhaustion underneath it.
He pushed himself off the car, hands slipping into his pockets. “I needed to see you.”
You exhaled through your nose, already tired of this conversation. “Cheol—”
“No,” he interrupted gently. “This time, just listen.”
Your eyes narrowed, but you didn’t walk away. That was enough for him.
He stepped closer, closing the distance between you. “You asked me what I wanted from you. I didn’t answer then, so I’ll answer now.” His voice was steady, unwavering. “I want you. I want every version of you—the one who glares at me, the one who shuts me out, the one who lets her guard down when she thinks no one’s looking.”
“And then what?”
Seungcheol tilted his head slightly. “Then I keep wanting you. Even when you push me away. Even when you tell yourself you don’t care.”
Your jaw tightened, your emotions warring against your better judgment. “I don’t need saving, Seungcheol.”
“I know,” he said easily. “You never did. But you do need someone who stays.”
Silence stretched between you, thick with unspoken words. Seungcheol could see the way your fingers twitched, 
So he softened, just enough. “Jeonghan told me.”
Your breath hitched, and for the first time, Seungcheol saw something other than defiance in your eyes. It was vulnerability, raw and unguarded.
“I don’t pity you,” he said before you could say anything. “I don’t think you’re broken. I just wish you’d let me in.”
You let out a breath, but it wasn’t exasperation this time. It sounded tired. Resigned. “I don’t know how,” you admitted.
Seungcheol gave you a small smile, tilting his head toward his car. “Then let’s figure it out.”
You stared at him for a long moment, trying to convince yourself this was a bad idea. That you should walk away like you always did.
But for the first time in a long time, you didn’t.
Instead, you exhaled sharply, shaking your head. “You’re so fucking annoying.”
Seungcheol grinned. “And yet, here you are.”
He opened the car door for you, waiting. And after another beat, you got in.
As Seungcheol got into the driver’s seat, you folded your arms and eyed him suspiciously.
“So?” you prompted.
He glanced at you. “So, what?”
You narrowed your eyes. “What exactly did Jeonghan tell you?”
Seungcheol tapped his fingers against the steering wheel, as if debating how much to say. “Enough.”
You scoffed. “Right. That’s not vague at all.” He smirked but didn’t answer immediately, which only irritated you more.
You shifted in your seat, arms tightening around yourself. “He probably just told you my sob story to make you feel bad.”
He exhaled. “Yeah, he told me about your parents, about how things weren’t easy. But he didn’t say it so I’d pity you.” His voice softened. “He said it so I’d understand you.”
You stared at him, lips parting slightly before you shut them again.
“Jeonghan’s known you for years,” Seungcheol continued. “And he made it pretty damn clear that if I wanted to keep you in my life, I had to stop being an idiot and actually see you.”
You swallowed, throat suddenly dry. “And what do you see?”
Seungcheol’s gaze held yours, steady and unyielding. “Someone who pretends not to care because it’s safer. Someone who pushes people away before they get the chance to leave.”
“But also,” he went on, “someone who cares way more than she lets on. Someone who makes it impossible for people to love her less once they’ve gotten to know her.”
Your head snapped back to him. That was Jeonghan’s exact wording.
Seungcheol’s lips twitched. “Yeah, he said that too.”
You huffed, leaning your head against the window. “He talks too much.”
Seungcheol chuckled, but then his voice dropped, quieter now. “Look, I’m not here because of what Jeonghan told me. I’m here because I don’t want to be just another person you expect to leave.”
You didn’t answer right away. Because you didn’t know how. Instead, you just muttered, “You’re annoying,” under your breath.
Seungcheol smirked. “You’ve mentioned.”
The ride was quiet, but not uncomfortable. He didn’t push you to say anything more, and you weren’t ready to give him any more than you already had.
When he pulled up in front of your building, he put the car in park and turned to you. “So what now?”
You shrugged, gripping the door handle. “I don’t know.”
Seungcheol leaned back against his seat, watching you carefully. “Are you gonna keep avoiding me?”
You hesitated, fingers tightening around the handle. “…No.”
That seemed to amuse him. “That didn’t sound very convincing.”
You sighed, turning to face him properly. “I don’t know how to do this, Seungcheol.”
His expression softened. “Then let’s figure it out together.”
You stared at him, searching for something—any sign that this was some kind of game. But all you found was patience, quiet and unwavering.
You exhaled and looked away. “I should go.”
He nodded, but before you could push the door open, he spoke again. “You never answered my question.”
You frowned. “What question?”
Seungcheol tilted his head, as if debating whether to repeat himself. Then, in a voice much softer than before, he said, “What do you want?”
Your breath hitched because wasn’t that the question you’d been running from this whole time?
You forced yourself to meet his gaze, your heart hammering in your chest. “I don’t know,” you admitted, voice barely above a whisper.
Seungcheol studied you for a long moment, then simply nodded. “Okay.”
You blinked. “Okay?”
He smiled slightly. “Okay. You don’t have to know yet.”
You swallowed past the lump in your throat. “That easy, huh?”
His smile grew. “Not everything has to be a fight, you know.”
“Tell that to my brain.”
Seungcheol chuckled. “I’ll work on it.”
You bit your lip, stealing one last glance at him before finally opening the door. “Good night, Seungcheol.”
“Good night,” he said.
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PART TWO COMING SOON
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ajbullet · 1 year ago
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My thoughts on episode 5 of PJO: spoilers (less points but more info on those points because OMGS)
-Annabeth knowing Percy is still alive when even Grover HIS PROTECTER wasn’t sure
-THE HUG! THE HUG! It wasn’t some awkward oh we have to hug in this scene thing like Leah went for that hug. Gripping his shirt, closed eyes, relieved sigh and all
- The fates were so cool to see. It was funny seeing just three old ladies in the mix of all the other people
- Percy being in shock the entire first part of the quest and now finally asking the important questions and feeling a tad overwhelmed. Such a realistic, delayed reaction to everything to has happened
- Ares. Not what I imagined, but bought into him eventually. It was a cool take on his character
- Not their heads popping up from behind that cement thing like whack-a-moles. Especially Annabeth
- Persassy and Sassabeth were not having it with Ares’ shit. Sassabeth came out of the gate swinging
- Grover staying behind????
- Oh my gods my percabeth heart was filled to the brim. I was on the edge of my seat for their every line to each other. I was INVESTED
- Annabeth hasn’t seen a single movie?? But why does that fit her character so well??? Post credit scene of episode 8 her and Percy movie date please?????
- WHAT IS LOVE BABY DONT HURT ME
- Not Percy using his powers for the FIRST TIME to save Annabeth’s life
- My girl is slaying with her braids and her tears. Love it
- “You’re better that this than me. You know it.”
- SHE. FUCKING. SAID. THE. THING. Where were you when Annabeth said Seaweed Brain for the first time? I was on my couch, crying and screaming and audibly gasping. Almost choked on my own spit (yes that information was necessary)
- He sacrificed himself for her again
- “I’m not leaving the Underworld without your mom” “I was gonna say come free me after the quest” Forgot the exact quotes but omg they know each other so well already
- Annabeth has come so far already. She sees the twisted, manipulative ways of the gods and unseats of accepting it and continuing it and ignoring it, she actively tries to put an end to it. Her friend isn’t “that way.” She is wise enough to know that she once was that way but wants to change. She is the best character not because she is perfect, but because she sees, acknowledges, and accepts her flaws and actively seeks to better herself. Every award to Leah im serious
- “Thanks for the emotional abuse and cheeseburgers” me to my parents 🫣
There’s so much more I want to expand on and point out and talk about but im probably just gonna make separate mini posts. Guys this episode was EVERYTHING
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corkinavoid · 1 year ago
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| welcome to my blog |
You can find my full-written works on ao3 under the name corkinavoid or click this link.
| tags |
#cork prompts is for all my ideas, prompts, ficlets, big and small
#cork adds is for my additions to someone else's posts, usually including reblogs
#cork writes is for everything concerning my writing, rants, tips, and all things relevant
#cork writes fantasy is a tag specifically for my DPxDC fic 'Fiance to a Star', updates, lore drops, moodboards, and soundtracks
#cork writes mafia is a tag specifically for my DPxDC work 'Crime Scene Do Not Cross', updates, backstories, additional snippets, moodboards, and memes
#cork likes is for reblogs, mostly any pretty art I find
#cork art is for anything I draw, which is rather rare
#cork memes is for shitposting, mostly about my own works
#cork game is for a writing game I play that you can participate in here.
You can use all of my prompts how you see fit as long as you link/tag/credit me.
Other than that, here's some fun facts about me:
• neurodivergent but not a minor
• English is not my first language
• my favorite ships are Dead Tired and Anger Management, and I'm also deeply in love with Al Ghul Twins trope
| masterpost |
I'm only linking my series here, not all prompts.
| DPxDC |
Changeling AU: [part 1], [part 2], [part 3], [part 4], [part 5], [a fic "Danny! Wait, who's Danny?"], [part 6], [part 7]
Haunted Family AU: [part 1], [a fic "It takes three days to get adopted"], [a fic "A cat walks by herself, but so does a ghost"], [a fic "A new family, an old family, and a never ever happening family walk into a gala"], [part 5]
Mercenary Danny AU: [part 1], [a fic "I'll pay you ten times"], [a fic "I want to hire you"], [a fic "I'm asking you out"]
Multiverse Police/Good!GIW: [part 1], [part 2], [side notes], [part 3], [another part 1], [another part 2]
Fantasy Magic School AU: [part 1], [a fic 'Fiance to a Star']
Fantasy Royal Fae AU: [part 1], [a fic 'Married to Winter']
Masters Mansion/Socialite Danny: [inspo], [part 1], [part 2], [part 3], [a fic 'Coronation'], [a fic 'There Are No Living Here']
John Constantine's Ghost Kids: [part 1], [part 2]
All the al Ghul Twins related posts: [one], [two], [three], [four], [five], [six], [seven], [eight]
Ring of Engage: [part 1], [part 2], [part 3], [part 4], [notes]
Hogwarts AU: [part 1], [part 2], [part 3], [part 4], [part 5], [part 6], [part 7], [part 8], [part 9], [part 10]
Ignorance: [part 1], [part 2]
Welcoming Party: [part 1], [part 2]
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delulusionwl · 6 months ago
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♡ I Can't Keep You Off My Diary ─ pt ii
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♡ I Can't Keep You Off My Diary ─ pt i Pairing ── Clarisse La Rue x Fem!Reader! | Apollo!Daughter Word ── 4k Synopsis ── In wich Clarisse see drawings of herself in reader's diary, and after beign ignored for long days, confronts the Apollo daughter. Warnings ── Nothing, I believe. Pls let me know if I should warn something! A bit of angst? Idk. Maybe a kiss? This is a kiss warning. A/n ── Hello my fave demigods, this is delulu again lol! Finally dropped the second part of "I Can't Keep You Off My Diary". Huge thanks for all the love and kudos on the last post! ♡ I'm excited to bring more about the characters from pjo (and other series too, pls let me know if you have someone in mind) Images are not mine, so credit goes to the respective owners. English is not my native language, so sorry in advance if I messed anything up! *Y/n/n = Your nickname
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Mortified. Disoriented. Shocked. Stunned. Devastated.
Y/n could list these and thousands of other words to describe her current state. The girl walked with heavy, deep steps toward her cabin, unintentionally ignoring some people who greeted her along the way. Her eyes were fixed on the ground, her face completely red, and the color even reached her ears.
"Worst. Day. Ever." Y/n thought, gritting her teeth in embarrassment as soon as her feet crossed the threshold of the cabin, slamming the door behind her without even noticing, drawing the attention of some of her siblings who were nearby.
The dark-haired girl marched to her bed and threw herself face down, screaming into the pillow as she thrashed on the mattress, angry, reliving the scene and becoming even more embarrassed.
The other children of Apollo who were in the cabin watched the scene with question marks above their heads, seeing Y/n bang her arms and legs on the bed while her face was buried in the pillow, muffling her scream. Anyone who saw her would think she was just angry and dissipating the feeling instead of hitting someone and getting a punishment from Chiron. But we know what was really happening.
As soon as Y/n stopped thrashing on the bed, she let out a muffled sigh and let her limbs collapse onto the mattress, while her mind replayed the scene over and over again.
"Y/n?" Grace, the girl with caramel-golden skin and eyes that blended green and amber, approached, sitting on her sister's bed. "What happened?" She finally asked, and with the silence in the cabin, you could hear a pin drop.
Everyone there wanted to know the reason for the commotion since Y/n wasn't usually like this. She rarely fought, and if she had to settle some scores, she'd do it in Capture the Flag. But everyone thought, "Finally, something got Y/n really upset?"
"Grace..." Y/n muttered, muffled, embarrassed, and almost on the verge of tears. "Grace, I’m mortified. I’ll never leave this cabin. Never."
Grace let out a nasal laugh and adjusted Y/n’s thick dark hair, which was slightly wavy from all the mess until she reached the cabin. "What happened that’s so bad?" She asked again, adjusting her sister's hair as she lay face down on the bed.
Grace's touch was so gentle and warm that Y/n felt a little calmer, and the gold-decorated nails on Grace’s fingers—since she had been playing with Emma and a gold pen—seemed to reflect all the girl's shine and the surrounding atmosphere.
Y/n lifted her head slightly and saw her closed diary on the bed, a little further away from Grace, and that was enough for her to mumble and bury her face back into the pillow, crying. Grace noticed Y/n's look and raised an eyebrow.
Everyone in the cabin knew about Y/n's diaries. It wasn't just one. Over the years, the girl had accumulated more and more, and the pages of the notebooks always seemed to run out too quickly, even though she had never torn a single page.
"It looks perfectly fine to me," Grace said, observing the notebook but not touching it. An unspoken rule about the Apollo cabin was: don’t touch other people’s things without permission, and the demigods there took it seriously, except for the younger or newer ones who sometimes broke the "silent rule"—but nothing a simple conversation couldn’t fix afterward. "Let me guess. Did someone read your diary?" Grace asked, hearing another scream from Y/n, who tried to bury herself even further into the mattress, causing the other girl to laugh.
Grace looked at the other siblings, waving them off gently. She’d be the one to calm Y/n down. The rest of the children of Apollo went back to what they were doing without any fuss.
"Was it that bad?" Grace asked.
"Bad?" Y/n sat up from the bed clumsily, her face still red. "Grace, it was horrible! Gods! I can never leave this cabin again. Never, got it? Damn, why did it happen like this?" Y/n said, crying and embarrassed, covering her face with her hands.
"Can I see?" Grace asked, even though she thought her request would be denied. But after a sigh, Y/n nodded silently.
That was enough for Grace to carefully pick up the notebook and open it, discreetly so the others wouldn't see what she was looking at. After flipping past just the first blank page, she finally understood why Y/n was almost as red as a tomato.
"Oh..." Grace said, surprised, flipping through the notebook, which made Y/n mutter. "Okay. Who saw this? The Aphrodite cabin or Ares? Gods, I don’t even know which is worse."
"Clarisse herself," Y/n said quietly, which left Grace even more surprised. "And two of her brothers."
"Oh!" Grace said, closing the notebook, earning a disgruntled and embarrassed murmur from her sister.
"I know..." Y/n said tiredly, still feeling flushed, and hugged her pillow. "I can't believe this is happening," she said, crying.
"It’s still no reason to lock yourself in here," Grace laughed, leaving the notebook aside on the bed, still smiling. "Since when...?"
"Honestly? I don’t know. It was just one day I started drawing her, and in the end... I just didn’t stop." Y/n said, feeling guilty, not looking at her sister.
"You know what this is, right?" Grace asked with an even bigger smile, catching the attention of the other girl, who was still punishing herself. Without words, the girl with the gold-painted nails and fingers made a heart shape with her index fingers in the air.
"Grace, it’s not funny."
"It’s not meant to be funny. Well, maybe just a little..."
"Seriously, by now, everyone at camp must know." Y/n said, hugging her legs and the pillow. "How embarrassing..."
"Don’t feel that way. I bet this will be an episode that won’t spread." Grace tried to ease Y/n’s worries. "Clarisse will take care of anyone who starts talking, so relax. She’d never let her own siblings tease her. But then again, maybe it’s not just you." The girl said thoughtfully.
"What do you mean?"
"Clarisse has been giving you some glances." Grace traced her finger around Y/n’s face with a smile.
"Grace!" Y/n rolled her eyes. "No way."
"I’m serious, even the Aphrodite cabin has noticed. But we’re all keeping quiet for our own good, of course." The girl let out a little laugh. "Who would've thought..."
"Don’t get carried away."
"Not my fault." Grace raised her hands in surrender, still laughing softly. "Don’t take it too seriously, Y/n/n. Lie down and rest until dinner." Her words earned a grumble from Y/n, which made Grace laugh and pat her sister’s shoulder as she got up to finish her own things.
On the other hand, Alec and Darius had been giving Clarisse mischievous and amused glances from the moment they started heading to the Hephaestus workshop until they returned to their cabin. However, before they could enter, Clarisse blocked the door, her death stare aimed at both brothers.
"If you open your mouths..." The girl said, irritated, pointing at each of them, who barely managed to hold back their laughter.
"Relax, Clari." Darius said, unable to control his chuckle for much longer.
"Nothing’s coming out of my mouth." Alec said in response, slightly better at keeping his excitement in check.
"Try anything and you’ll be dead by morning." Clarisse said, storming into the cabin like a hurricane, throwing herself onto the couch in the strategy area, ignoring the others who were around.
One of her sisters, unaware of what had just happened, joined Clarisse to plan for the upcoming Capture the Flag game, as Clarisse was the one who practically designed all the strategies. However, even though she tried, the girl wasn’t paying attention to what her sister was saying. Every now and then, she simply nodded silently, her mind drifting back to what had happened earlier that morning.
Clarisse didn’t want to admit it. Maybe she never would, not even in death, but she had enjoyed looking at the drawings in Y/n’s diary. As soon as her eyes landed on the lines that curved and outlined her own face on the white pages, she felt the world stop for a brief moment while her heart raced like never before.
"Damn." The daughter of Ares thought, feeling her heart beat a little faster as she remembered the image of herself above faceless bodies, holding her spear high, adorned with a beautiful armor. May the gods not hear her, but she wanted that drawing for herself. "What am I thinking?"
"Clarisse?" Joscelin asked, bringing Clarisse’s attention back, her cheeks slightly flushed. "What do you think?"
Clarisse swallowed imperceptibly, furrowing her brows and adjusting herself on the couch, nodding. "Sure." The daughter of Ares agreed without even hearing what the other had said.
Then, Joscelin spoke again, but Clarisse’s thoughts drifted back to what had happened. The girl remembered the pressed and dried rose that was on one of the pages, the same page with her drawing, smiling gently, with the same rose in her hair.
Clarisse suppressed a breath. "Was that flower meant for me?" She wondered internally, feeling something strange in her stomach. That sensation only grew stronger when she thought that she wanted that flower for herself. After that last thought, the daughter of Ares stood up quickly, heading straight for the door and making her way to the camp’s training area, even as she heard Joscelin call out, "Clarisse?!"
"What’s with her?" Joscelin asked, looking at the others, who had finally noticed how quickly Clarisse had left the cabin. Some shrugged and didn’t care, but Darius and Alec exchanged mischievous looks. Reading each other’s minds. "Dumb and Dumber, what do you know about this?" Joscelin asked the two.
"It’s a secret." Darius said, not bothered by his sister’s joke, which made Alec laugh even more.
"Spill it." Joscelin said.
"Not even dead, literally. Clarisse would kill us." Alec replied, laughing even more, and soon Darius joined in. As the two left to do their own thing, still chuckling, Joscelin rolled her eyes and pushed it aside, hoping that whatever it was, it hadn't messed with Clarisse's mind for the Capture the Flag game.
Clarisse, nervously caught up in her own thoughts, hurried with quick steps to the camp's training area, quickly donning the mandatory safety gear and grabbing a random sword just to start delivering fast and strong strikes to her usual training dummy.
The girl tried to focus only on her task of hitting the poor dummy, but her thoughts always returned to the same place. To the same memory. And each time it happened—which was many—her strikes grew faster and more powerful.
The demigods passing by and training nearby watched with some concern, but of course, none were brave enough to say anything to Clarisse. Some even chose to cut their training short, not wanting to be the next target of the daughter of Ares.
After several minutes of trying to shake her thoughts, Clarisse sighed and set aside her strikes, glaring at the dummy in frustration. She was finally thinking about the beginning. Since Y/n’s arrival at camp and how Clarisse had never been so aggressive or petulant with her "jokes."
Her heart raced as she noticed things about herself connected to Y/n. Finally, everything made sense; it was even clearer now. "Do I like Apollo on mute?" The girl thought, a crease forming between her brows.
With that question ringing in her mind, she scanned the area with little interest, trying to find answers, until she saw a small group of Apollo’s children heading somewhere, and Clarisse tried to spot Y/n among them.
A snap happened in her curly-haired head as she blinked a few times, remembering she’d been looking for Y/n in the camp pavilion, just like she used to look for her by the celebratory bonfires. She remembered herself tracing the contours of Y/n with her eyes, noting how she blended into the surroundings and how she seemed to shine under the sunlight, covered by her less colorful features. She recalled that whenever she saw Y/n, she would go up to her and pour out her weird jokes, each one becoming less teasing and rude than the last, unlike how she treated other demigods.
Clarisse didn’t know when this had started, but she knew it had happened. "I like Apollo on mute," she thought.
The girl didn’t know how to react. She wasn’t angry, but she wasn’t happy either. It was a new feeling, a bit uncomfortable, her stomach felt strange. Clarisse had heard about what it was like to like someone, and before, she’d felt those same sensations, only for battle, the taste of future victory. Clarisse, like all other children of Ares, had been in love with the fight, but now, she was in love with one of Apollo’s daughters.
"How ironic." Clarisse chuckled to herself, but without showing a smile.
Noticing the day had finally turned dark, Clarisse took off her gear and placed it in its rightful place, heading toward the pavilion while thinking that she should do something about this.
When she arrived, she saw the usual gathering of demigods, most of them already sitting, while others prepared their food. As always, her eyes quickly scanned the room, looking for the presence of a certain someone, and it didn't take long before her eyes landed on who she was looking for. Y/n.
The daughter of Apollo was looking around the pavilion like a frightened animal, tapping her foot on the ground as she grabbed her food from the buffet beside some of her siblings. As soon as their eyes met, Y/n gasped and widened her eyes, quickly moving away from the buffet area and squeezing into her siblings to make her offering, doing so quickly to avoid giving Clarisse the chance to move from her spot.
"Hey!" Brandon complained, holding his plate tightly before Y/n nearly knocked it over in her haste, but he was ignored.
"Sorry, Dad, this will be quick." Y/n said, making her offering, burning part of her food in the fire before almost running to her cabin’s table.
Before Clarisse could make her way to the Apollo table, her attention was diverted.
"Clari, grab your plate and come on!" Olivia, one of her sisters, said as she passed by.
Reluctantly, the daughter of Ares did as she was told, seeing that everyone in her cabin was eager about the upcoming Capture the Flag game, and any place was good enough for them to talk about it. Even in the crowded pavilion, just to put fear into the other demigods.
Her eyes stayed on Y/n, who quickly averted her gaze from Clarisse and nervously tried to start a conversation with her siblings. The daughter of Ares thought to herself, "Not today, but tomorrow you won't escape."
Clarisse grabbed her food, made her offering, and sat at her cabin's table, listening to her siblings talk and occasionally joining in the conversations, with her eyes always drifting back to the Apollo cabin's table.
"Tomorrow," Clarisse thought angrily, eyeing her spear as she donned her vest for Capture-the-Flag. "Tomorrow, you won't escape." She mimicked her thoughts from weeks ago in a low, sharp voice, almost rolling her eyes, still irritated.
"What’s this, Clarisse? Talking to yourself?" Liam asked, lightly amused, still inside the cabin along with a few other Ares kids who were getting ready for Capture-the-Flag, which was about an hour away.
"None of your business," Clarisse grumbled.
"Hey, take it easy!" Liam replied with a grin. "Me and the others are heading out. Whatever’s been on your mind all this time, shake it off—we’ve got a flag to catch today." Liam said as he left the cabin, followed by three other siblings who continued chatting among themselves, causing Clarisse to roll her eyes.
Clarisse couldn't help but recall Y/n avoiding her like a camper avoiding an unexpected mission. The daughter of Apollo seemed to have adjusted her entire schedule to avoid bumping into Clarisse, from combat training to history lessons. But Clarisse was waiting for the moment to approach—when she would find Y/n walking through camp, carefree.
It had happened a few times, of course. But whenever Y/n made eye contact with Clarisse, she did one of the following: 1) She would sprint off like a madwoman, disappearing after just a few seconds. Clarisse remembered how fast Y/n was after their physical training sessions together, and now she found herself cursing Y/n's agility. 2) She would latch onto any nearby demigod and start talking nonsense, pulling them away from Clarisse. Y/n was good at starting and maintaining conversations, even though she wasn’t surrounded by friends. And of course, all of this was getting under Clarisse’s skin.
Irritated, Clarisse got out of bed and marched toward the field where they usually prepared for Capture-the-Flag. Only a few demigods were around, and those who were kept their distance, sensing the stormy mood of Clarisse.
However, it wasn't until she passed one of the cabins that she glanced to the side and saw someone else also heading to the field—it was Y/n, distracted as she examined her bow, her divine gift.
Clarisse quickened her pace silently, closing the distance until she reached Y/n and grabbed her arm, pulling her toward the nearest cabin, hearing the surprised murmur from the daughter of Apollo.
As soon as the daughter of Ares pinned Y/n against the wall, Y/n’s eyes widened in shock.
"C-Clarisse?" Y/n asked nervously, her cheeks starting to heat up as she remembered that earlier in the day, she had picked up her diary again just to doodle something. But before she knew it, her hand had sketched Clarisse, stunned with the notebook in her hands. And once again, she recalled what had happened weeks before.
"No. Apollo, I’m going to pull the sun out of my pocket." Clarisse responded sarcastically. "Why are you avoiding me?"
"Avoiding?" Y/n asked. "I’m not avoiding you… what are you talking about?" The daughter of Apollo laughed nervously, swallowing hard, not meeting Clarisse's gaze.
Clarisse looked at her seriously, causing Y/n to feel flustered and shyly glance at her, starting to feel embarrassed.
"The diary," Clarisse began after a brief pause, and that was enough to make Y/n almost jump out of her skin.
"Forget about it. I—I didn’t want you to see that, it was a secret... but even if it wasn't, you..." Y/n started nervously, trying to fix what had happened, but her words were enough to make Clarisse slam her hand against the wood behind Y/n, close to her head, causing the daughter of Apollo to shrink back.
"Let me speak?" Clarisse said, annoyed. "I see the damn diary and then you run off like... I don’t know, a satyr running from a flood?" Her narrowed eyes were locked on Y/n’s, who swallowed hard.
"Sorry," Y/n muttered softly, which earned a sarcastic, nasal laugh from Clarisse.
"You gave me one hell of a headache, girl."
"It wasn't... my intention," Y/n whispered, avoiding the girl in front of her, who was still slightly leaning against the wood that Y/n's back was pressed against. "Clarisse, just... forget it, okay?" Y/n said, preparing to walk back to where all the demigods were already gathered, waiting for the game to begin.
"You’re not going anywhere until I’m done talking." Clarisse said seriously, pushing Y/n back into place with her finger on her shoulder. "What? You think you can sketch all these things about me and not face me?" This made Y/n mutter under her breath.
"I didn’t want you to see!" Y/n grumbled, a little irritated, but still embarrassed, and Clarisse let out a nasal, sarcastic laugh at the pink tint of the girl’s cheeks, along with her slight irritation. "Besides, you shouldn’t care about what I draw in my diaries." Y/n swallowed hard, trying to maintain a confident and unshaken pose.
"Concern isn’t exactly what I’m feeling." Clarisse shrugged, her sharp, penetrating gaze locked on Y/n’s. "But you have a reason for it. Why am I in your diary? And don’t tell me I’m just a model because that won’t fly."
"A-a... Well... y-you..." Y/n tried to respond, glancing nervously at Clarisse, anxious and embarrassed. She soon remembered Grace making a heart with her fingers, feeling her face burn even hotter as her heart raced in her chest. "Argh, it was a mistake. Forget it."
Y/n tried to move away from Clarisse once more, but the other girl simply pressed her other hand against the wooden wall—still holding her spear firmly in her fist, trapping Y/n between her arms.
"C-Clarisse... the game," Y/n tried to remind the girl, looking at her arms on either side of her body.
"You’re not convincing me," Clarisse said, acting as if the proximity didn’t affect her, but in truth, her heart was pounding. Having Y/n so close made the butterflies in her stomach feel stronger, and the soft scent of Y/n's perfume was very pleasing. "And besides, I told you, you're not leaving until I’m done talking."
Y/n swallowed hard, breathing shakily with Clarisse’s closeness. Her heart was also racing, and the girl clenched her fists tightly—one of them wrapped around her bow with the same intensity, trying to keep Clarisse from noticing just how much more nervous she was.
"I’m waiting. Why am I in your diary?" Clarisse asked softly, with a nearly feline tone, trying to prove her point.
Y/n swallowed hard, taking in every detail of the close Clarisse, still trapped between her arms, knowing her mind would store all the details of this moment to draw in her diary. Once more. Perhaps one last time.
The daughter of Apollo lowered her gaze to Clarisse’s lips, which were close but still far enough. The same lips now curled into a small smile, perhaps a playful one this time, but with a touch less malice than when she was ready to tease some demigod.
Y/n thought, trembling and out of breath, finally confirming to herself why Clarisse had appeared in so many pages of her diaries: I like Clarisse.
"Cat got your tongue?" Clarisse asked, tilting her head, trying to catch Y/n’s eyes with her own. She was enjoying pulling these reactions from the daughter of Apollo.
"I like you," Y/n blurted out quickly, holding her breath and closing her eyes, afraid of what she might see next. But Clarisse smiled wider this time, satisfied—yet still entertained. "A-and I know it’s not mutual, so let’s just ignore this and move on—"
Before Y/n could nervously continue speaking, with her eyes tightly shut, Clarisse interrupted by placing one of her free hands on the heated, red face of the girl, silencing her with a simple, soft kiss.
Y/n’s eyes widened as she felt Clarisse’s soft lips against hers, and her face turned an even deeper shade of red, if that was even possible. With her free hand, the daughter of Apollo held the other girl’s forearm, closing her eyes and kissing her back, still trembling and anxious.
Clarisse was being gentle, knowing how easily Y/n got scared of things—this was proven by all her escapes over the past weeks. So, the girl kept the kiss soft and slow, gently stroking Y/n's face with her thumb before releasing her, easing away. Gentle and careful—two things Clarisse never thought she’d act like with anyone. But here she was, with the daughter of the sun, who more and more lit her up with her inner sunlight.
The daughter of Ares pulled away, her face slightly flushed, as she watched Y/n open her eyes and take a deep breath, swallowing hard, which made Clarisse chuckle softly, a smug grin on her face.
"Sorry," Clarisse began to say, and her words made Y/n tilt her head in confusion, not understanding why Clarisse was apologizing or how that word even left her lips—since it was so unlike her. "But I’m not going to lose the Capture the Flag just because you’re on the opposing team. Next time, I want you on my team." Clarisse said with that same cocky smile, stepping away from Y/n and looking her up and down, which made the daughter of Apollo feel even more embarrassed. "I’ll see you after the game, Apollo on mute, I want to take a second look at your diary. And don’t even think about running away from me again."
With that, the daughter of Ares turned her back and started making her way back to the playing field, leaving behind a breathless and embarrassed Y/n, her mind racing at full speed, knowing that her diary would soon have page after page dedicated to Clarisse.
Because the daughter of Apollo couldn't keep the daughter of Ares out of it.
< Part 1
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pandapetals · 7 months ago
Text
Sanctuary - Part One
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Logan and Wade are sent by Stryker to find a journalist who has been digging around trying to expose Team X. Logan isn't prepared when he meets an intriguing neighbor causing him to question himself and the mission.
origins logan howlett x fem!reader - team x mission, shy reader, no y/n, she/her pronouns used instead of you, logan's pov, origins wade, awkwardness, guarded feelings, angst, AU, crushes, logan kinda being a stalker, stryker and victor cameos, fighting, cussing, wade being a good friend, reserved logan
a/n: Okay buckle up because this is a long author’s note but when do i not make an essay? I’m an origins girlie and will find any excuse to write about origins logan (it was the first fic i wrote) so here we are with another one. Idk if this makes sense—maybe it’s an AU where logan just works with team x but somehow doesn’t go through the weapon x program idk, okay. It started as a one shot of shy reader (the club scene) then ended up becoming the longest thing i have ever written for logan. I’ve been working on it for the past 2…maybe 3 weeks and yeah…finally posting it after editing it. I was gonna make it a sad, angsty ending but i can’t do it, i just can’t. Logan deserves happy endings. P.s. it’s from logan’s POV that’s why it’s she/her pronouns instead of you. I’m used to writing in third person (creative writing major here) but for fics i usually do second person but here i just wanted to do something different. So sue me.
apparently this is too long to post in one go so here's part one and here's part two
word count: 40k
divider credit: @enchanthings
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Logan rubbed the bridge of his nose, trying to ignore the endless stream of chatter pouring from Wade’s mouth. It was like trying to drown out the buzz of a fly that just wouldn’t leave him alone.
“Logan?” Wade’s voice cut through the humid night air like a blade.
“Wade, for the love of God, shut up,” Logan muttered, low and gruff. “I can’t hear anything if you keep flappin’ your damn jaw.”
Across the street, neon lights flickered on the facade of a rundown bar, casting fractured shadows over a row of grime-slicked windows above. The air smelled of stale beer and gasoline, tinged with a hint of rot. Logan took a deep breath, focusing, scanning for any sign of their target—the journalist who’d gotten too curious about things he had no business knowing.
Wade just rolled his eyes, unfazed by Logan’s irritation. “I was just trying to tell you…that’s our guy,” he said, nodding towards a short, nervous-looking man slipping into the front door of the apartment building above the bar. The man’s hands were shoved deep in his coat pockets, head down, moving quickly, like he wanted to be invisible.
Logan’s eyes narrowed. Something about the guy didn’t feel right. But they didn’t have much else to go on, and he didn’t have the patience to argue with Wade right now.
“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath. He gestured for Wade to follow, and they crossed the street, dodging a couple of potholes filled with oily rainwater. The entryway smelled even worse up close, like someone had left a pile of garbage to rot right inside the door.
Inside, the dim hallway was narrow and claustrophobic, with walls covered in peeling, faded wallpaper that might have once been green. Logan’s steps were silent, practiced—Wade’s, not so much. His boots thudded against the cracked linoleum as he craned his neck, looking around like a tourist on his first big-city adventure.
They found the apartment number and pushed their way in, catching the man off guard as he fumbled to pull a sandwich out of a paper bag. He dropped it with a startled yelp, hands flying up in surrender, eyes wide and terrified.
His voice came out in a high, trembling squeak. “L-look, I don’t want any trouble! I can give you money—I swear, I don’t have much, but—”
Wade cocked his head, raising a skeptical brow. “Money? Oh, sweetheart, we’re not here for money.” He let the word drip like honey, and the man flinched. Wade leaned in, studying the man like he was an insect pinned to a board. “You don’t know anything about Team X?”
The man’s face went pale, a sheen of sweat breaking out on his forehead. He shook his head frantically, words spilling out in a stammered mess. “N-no, I swear—I’m just an accountant, alright? I don’t know what you’re talking about. Team…what? I’ve never even heard of it.”
Logan stood back, watching the guy’s every twitch, every dart of his eyes. Fear had a way of squeezing the truth out of people, and this guy looked like he was about to come apart at the seams. Logan’s jaw tightened, his nostrils flaring slightly. He caught Wade’s eye and gave a small, almost imperceptible nod. The poor bastard was clean—just some pencil pusher in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Wade’s grin only widened a slow, wicked curve that made Logan’s stomach sink. He recognized that look: Wade had just had one of his bright ideas.
Wade clapped the accountant on the shoulder, making the man jump. “Well, congrats, pal. You’ve just saved yourself from a world of hurt. But I gotta ask—you like it here?” He gestured around the dingy apartment, where the wallpaper was peeling into long, damp strips and the faint odor of mildew hung in the air. “Nice digs. Bet the landlord’s a gem.”
The accountant blinked, looking from Wade to Logan in bewilderment as if he was just realizing they weren’t here to kill him. “Uh…I guess? I mean, it’s not the worst place I’ve lived.” 
“Perfect.” Wade snapped his fingers, eyes lighting up like a kid who’d just been handed a new toy.
Logan shot Wade a warning look. “Wade. Don’t even start.”
Wade ignored him, snapping his fingers again as if he’d just solved world hunger. “Think about it, Logan. We get a lease here. Set up a cozy little base. I’ll bring a lava lamp, we’ll order takeout, and we can scope out every last tenant till we find this guy. Like fishing, but in an apartment building.”
Logan scowled, crossing his arms. “You’re saying we go through the hassle of a rental application. Background checks. And wait.”
“Come on, think of it as blending in! Imagine us as friendly neighborhood roommates, huh?” Wade slapped him on the shoulder, a little too enthusiastically. “We can get to know the neighbors. Borrow a cup of sugar. You’ll look adorable in an apron.”
Logan let out a low growl, but he could see Wade wouldn’t let it go. They were running out of options, and if this journalist were smart, he’d be laying low. A bit of patience might be the only way to catch him off guard.
“Fine,” he muttered, the word tasting bitter. “But if you so much as mention lava lamps again, I’m throwing you out the window.”
Wade’s grin was all teeth. “Deal. Now let’s go talk to the landlord. You want to do the talking, or should I?” He turned back to the accountant, clapping him on the shoulder again. “Thanks for the inspiration, buddy. Now, if you don’t mind, we’ll just let ourselves out.”
The accountant sank onto his couch, looking dazed, still clutching his sandwich like it was a life preserver. Logan followed Wade to the door, shaking his head. Somehow, he knew this stakeout was going to be the longest assignment of his life.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
“Well, Stryker isn’t happy,” Wade was saying, his voice an incessant buzz in the background. “But when is that dude ever happy? I feel bad for his wife—assuming she exists. Maybe he just clones himself a girlfriend every year. Could you imagine? ‘Sorry, honey, I’ll be home late tonight, gotta send a couple of mutants to—’”
Logan ignored Wade’s rambling as he surveyed their new “home.” Calling it a dump would’ve been generous. The wallpaper was peeling, a thick layer of grime coated the windows, and the faint smell of mildew seeped out from behind the walls. They were at least lucky enough to have separate rooms, but even with a door to shut Wade out, Logan doubted he’d get much peace.
“Did he give you any more information?” Logan finally cut in, hoping Wade might actually have something useful.
Wade blinked, as if surprised that Logan was listening. “About the journalist?”
Logan clenched his teeth. “No—of course about the fucking journalist. Like what the guy might look like, or any other detail that could help us find him?”
Wade shrugged, completely unfazed by Logan’s irritation. “Nope. Stryker was being vague again. Just the usual cryptic bullshit. I swear, the dude is losing it. First, he sends us out here to find some mystery man—”
Logan rolled his eyes, tuning Wade out. They’d been here for a week now, trawling through this run-down building and questioning almost every unlucky soul who happened to live here, and they were no closer to finding their target than when they’d started. Stryker hadn’t given them much to go on, which only made Logan suspect that there was more to this mission than he was letting on.
Finally, Logan couldn’t take it anymore. He grabbed his jacket off the back of a chair and headed for the door. “I’ll be back,” he muttered over his shoulder, already halfway out.
Wade called after him. “Where are you going? Got a hot date?”
Logan didn’t dignify that with an answer. He took the stairs down two at a time, feeling a grim sense of relief as he stepped outside and let the cool night air hit him. The bar below their building wasn’t much better than the apartment—it was dim, grimy, and smelled faintly of stale beer and spilled whiskey. But at least it was quiet.
He pushed open the door and made his way inside, hoping he might get a few moments to himself, maybe even a drink strong enough to dull the ever-present headache that came with dealing with Wade.
The place was nearly empty, just a few regulars hunched over the bar and a lone woman sitting in a booth near the back. Logan’s gaze lingered on her for a moment longer than he meant to. She looked…out of place. Pretty, in a way that seemed wasted on a hole like this. 
She was sitting alone in a corner booth, a book propped open in front of her. Her hair fell over her face as she read, strands catching in the dim light, and she seemed oblivious to the world around her. There was a quiet stillness about her, a kind of focused calm that didn’t quite fit in a bar like this. Logan found himself wondering what a woman like her was doing here, in a place that looked like it had seen one too many bar fights and smelled like it.
For a moment, he debated going over, then caught himself. Not here to make friends, he reminded himself. Still, his gaze kept drifting back to her, curiosity nagging at him. She didn’t look like the regulars in this place—she was younger, softer, with a certain self-contained reserve that drew him in despite himself.
Maybe it was the whiskey, or maybe it was the exhaustion of the past week catching up to him, but before he knew it, he’d grabbed his glass and walked over to her booth.
She looked up, eyes widening slightly as he approached. Logan stopped just short of her table, suddenly aware of how rough he must look after days on the road, stubble shadowing his jaw, his clothes rumpled and worn. He cleared his throat.
“Mind if I sit?” His voice was softer than he intended, and he cursed himself for feeling the slightest bit nervous.
She hesitated, then gave a small nod, closing her book. Up close, he could see the way her eyes flicked over him, assessing but cautious. She didn’t say anything—just looked at him, as if waiting for him to explain why he’d interrupted her quiet.
“You live upstairs?” he asked, nodding toward the ceiling. He thought he might’ve seen her in the hallway when he and Wade moved in, but he hadn’t paid much attention at the time.
“Down the hall,” she said softly, her voice barely carrying over the dull hum of the jukebox. “I saw you moving in yesterday. You and…your friend.”
Logan almost chuckled at that. Wade was a lot of things, but “friend” was stretching it. “Yeah, sorry about him. He’s…a handful.”
A hint of a smile tugged at her lips, a glimmer of amusement that made him feel just a little less like a stranger in a strange place. “I noticed.”
He found himself studying her face—the slight curve of her smile, the way her fingers toyed with the edge of her book as if part of her mind was still half in whatever story she’d been reading. Something about her felt…steady. Centered. It was a quality he’d rarely seen in anyone.
“Logan,” he said, finally offering his name, though he didn’t expect her to care.
She nodded, meeting his gaze for a fraction of a second longer than he’d expected. “Nice to meet you, Logan.”
Silence settled between them, not quite uncomfortable, but heavy with unspoken questions. He could sense she wasn’t the type to pry, but there was a curiosity in her eyes like she was trying to figure him out, just as he was with her.
After a beat, she lifted her book slightly, an invitation for him to leave her in peace. But instead of moving, Logan found himself asking, “What’re you reading?”
She blinked, a bit surprised, then held up the cover for him to see—a worn paperback mystery novel. The kind where the hero always catches the killer but loses something in the process. 
He smirked. “Not exactly light reading for a place like this.”
She shrugged, a hint of a smile returning. “I like the quiet here…and usually nobody bothers me.”
“Well, guess I’m breaking that rule,” he muttered, more to himself than to her.
She didn’t seem bothered. She just looked at him with those steady, curious eyes, and for a moment, he forgot about the mission, about the dirty apartment upstairs, about Wade’s grating voice. Here, in this booth, in this shitty bar, with a quiet woman and a book, he felt…still.
The moment shattered when he heard Wade’s voice behind him, loud and smug. “Already making friends, huh? Didn't know you had it in you, Logan.”
Logan tensed, jaw tightening as he glanced over his shoulder. Wade was leaning against the bar with that insufferable smirk, arms crossed, clearly enjoying himself. Logan shot him a look that could have peeled paint.
“Mind your own business, Wade,” he growled, then turned back to her, keeping his voice softer. “Thanks for letting me sit.”
She nodded, her expression as calm and unreadable as before, though there was a flicker of something in her eyes—amusement, maybe, or curiosity. It was hard to tell. She watched him as he stood, and he found himself hesitating, not quite ready to break whatever strange, quiet connection had settled between them.
Wade wasn’t about to let it linger. “Come on, Romeo,” he called, grinning as he gestured for Logan to follow. “We’ve got stuff to do, remember? Or did you forget in all the charming small talk?”
Logan clenched his teeth, resisting the urge to punch the smirk off Wade’s face. Instead, he gave her one last look—a silent apology or a promise to be less of a stranger next time. But her gaze remained steady, unreadable, as he turned to go.
As he walked past Wade, he grabbed him by the shoulder, steering him roughly toward the door. “Let’s go,” he muttered.
Wade snickered, clearly enjoying the opportunity to needle him. “Touchy, touchy. Guess you do have a heart under all that grumpiness.”
Logan ignored him, shoving Wade ahead and out the door, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was leaving something unfinished. Her image stayed in his mind—the way she’d watched him with those curious eyes, her quiet presence a balm in a week filled with noise and chaos. He didn’t know what it was about her that tugged at him, but he knew it wasn’t something he could explain, even to himself.
Once they were back on the street, Wade was still talking, filling the night air with his usual nonsensical commentary. Logan barely heard him. His mind was elsewhere, replaying that brief encounter in the dimly lit booth. He’d come down to the bar for a moment of peace, maybe a clue, maybe just a strong drink. He hadn’t expected to find…whatever that was.
But there was no time to dwell on it. They had a job to do, and he’d be damned if he let Wade screw it up.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
Logan was screwed. Ever since that brief encounter in the bar, she’d been wedged in his mind like a splinter he couldn’t dig out. He’d catch himself lying on the worn-out couch in the apartment, tuning out Wade’s endless chatter and focusing instead on the faint sounds of her footsteps from down the hall.
She lived across the hall, exactly three doors down. He knew that much, even though he hadn’t seen her again since that night. She didn’t come or go often, and when she did, it was only for short trips—a few minutes out, then back to the quiet solitude of her apartment. 
Logan found himself straining his heightened senses to catch any trace of her: the click of her door, the soft pad of her feet against the hallway carpet, even the faint murmur of her voice when she spoke on the phone. It was insane. He didn’t know the first thing about her, but somehow she’d settled under his skin.
Fuck, he thought, running a hand over his face. I’m a damn stalker.
He tried to shake it off, forcing himself to focus on the mission, but the building felt too cramped, the walls too thin, and her presence was always just out of reach. Wade, of course, noticed Logan’s distraction and was more than happy to exploit it.
“So, when are you gonna introduce me to your girlfriend?” Wade quipped one morning, sprawled across the armchair with his feet propped up on the coffee table. “Or are you just gonna keep sulking around, hoping she magically falls into your lap?”
Logan shot him a glare. “She’s not my girlfriend, Wade.”
“Oh, sure,” Wade drawled, smirking. “That’s why you’ve been lying here for the last three hours, sniffing the air like a bloodhound every time she walks past. I swear, you’re worse than a teenager.”
Logan clenched his fists, jaw tight. He’d deny it if he could, but Wade had a point, and it grated on him. He needed an excuse—a real reason to cross paths with her again, something that wouldn’t make him look like a complete creep.
Wade, apparently sensing an opportunity to meddle, sat up with a grin. “Tell you what, old man. How about you make yourself useful and take our laundry down to the laundromat? You look like you could use a walk, maybe clear your head a bit.” He tossed a balled-up shirt at Logan’s face.
Logan caught it, growling. “Since when do you do laundry?”
“Since never. But I’m feeling generous,” Wade said, smirking as he dropped a bundle of clothes into a bag and shoved it at Logan. “Besides, who knows? Maybe you’ll run into someone interesting while you’re there. Just a thought.”
Logan snatched the bag, too annoyed to argue, and stalked out of the apartment. The morning was cool, the sky overcast, and the streets were quiet as he made his way down to the laundromat which was across the street from the apartment.
He told himself he was only doing it to get Wade off his back—but he couldn’t deny the faint flicker of anticipation at the thought of seeing her again.
The laundromat was nearly empty when he pushed open the door, the dull hum of washing machines filling the air. And there she was, sitting on a cracked plastic chair near the back, a book open on her lap, her brow furrowed in concentration. She didn’t notice him at first, too absorbed in her reading, a strand of hair falling over her face as she turned a page.
Logan froze, his grip tightening around the bag of clothes. Get it together, he told himself, forcing his feet to move as he made his way to an empty machine a few steps away from her. He tossed the clothes in, doing his best to look casual, though he could feel his heart thumping harder than it should.
After a moment, he glanced her way, watching the way her eyes skimmed the words on the page, her lips moving slightly as if she were tasting each sentence. She looked…content. Lost in her own world, soft and quiet in a way that felt like the exact opposite of everything in his life right now.
He cleared his throat, searching for something to say, anything that wouldn’t make him sound like a complete idiot. “Good book?” he managed, his voice gruff, and immediately regretted it. Smooth, Logan. Real smooth.
She looked up, surprised, her gaze locking onto his. For a second, he thought she might brush him off, but then she gave a small, shy smile.
“Yeah, it’s… a mystery novel,” she said, holding up the cover. Her voice was soft, and he caught a faint trace of lavender like she’d been folding fresh laundry just before he came in. “I like to read while I’m waiting. It makes the time go faster.”
Logan nodded, his usual stoic expression softening just a little. “Seems like a good way to pass the time. This place could use the distraction.” He glanced around at the flickering fluorescent lights, the chipped tiles, the machines rattling like they were on their last legs. “Not exactly a scenic spot.”
She laughed, a quiet sound, but it lit up her face in a way that caught him off guard. “No, it’s not. But it’s peaceful, in its own way.”
They fell into a silence as she went back to her book, and Logan found himself watching her out of the corner of his eye as he sorted through the clothes, feeding them into the machine one by one. There was a calmness about her, a quiet strength, and he couldn’t help but wonder what her story was—why someone like her had chosen to live in a place like this, so close to the kind of trouble people usually ran from.
After a few minutes of silence, Logan cleared his throat, searching for something to say. “You… uh, you live alone?”
She looked up, her eyes narrowing just a fraction, a hint of suspicion flickering there. He could almost see her calculating whether or not to answer. “Do you really think I’d tell you that?” she asked, her tone mild but pointed.
Logan’s heart skipped. Shit. He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling like an idiot. “I didn’t—I’m not some creepy guy, I swear,” he said quickly, stumbling over his words in a way he wasn’t used to. “Just… making conversation.”
She arched an eyebrow, a faint smile tugging at her lips. “And you expect me to take your word for it?”
He felt heat rise to his face and shifted uncomfortably, aware of how ridiculous he must sound. This wasn’t him—Logan didn’t do small talk, especially not with someone he barely knew. But something about her had him feeling giddy, bumbling his way through a conversation he wasn’t quite prepared for.
He cleared his throat, forcing himself to hold her gaze. “Look, I’m sorry. You have a point. It’s just… this neighborhood doesn’t exactly feel safe. I guess that’s why I asked.”
She sighed softly, closing her book and running her fingers along its worn spine. “Even more of a reason not to answer your questions, don’t you think?” Her tone was cool and cautious, but there was no malice there—just a quiet wariness that made him wonder what she’d been through to put up those walls.
Logan nodded, feeling a twinge of respect for her caution, even if it stung a little to be on the receiving end of it. She’s smart, he thought. Smart enough not to trust a stranger with more muscles than manners, asking personal questions in a laundromat.
An awkward silence settled between them, filled with the rhythmic hum of the machines. He glanced down at his laundry, watching the clothes tumble through the soapy water, trying to think of something to say that wouldn’t sound stupid or intrusive. Finally, he let out a long breath.
“Look, I know I’m not exactly smooth,” he muttered, barely loud enough for her to hear. “I just… don’t see many people like you around here.”
She tilted her head, curiosity softening her guarded expression. “People like me?”
“Yeah. People who—” He struggled to find the right words. “Who seem like they don’t belong in a place like this.” He gave her a slight, self-conscious shrug. “You look… well, like you’ve got better places to be than a crappy laundromat in a bad part of town. That’s all.”
She studied him for a moment, the corner of her mouth lifting in what almost looked like amusement. “And you think you belong here?”
He let out a dry laugh, surprised by the question. “Probably more than most. It’s not exactly my first time in a place like this.”
“Figures,” she murmured, her gaze sweeping over him, taking in the worn leather jacket, the stubble, the roughness that clung to him like a second skin. “You look… I don’t know. Like you’re used to keeping people at a distance.”
Logan blinked, caught off guard by the accuracy of her observation. He shifted under her gaze, feeling exposed in a way he wasn’t used to. “Yeah, well,” he said, gruffly, “sometimes distance is a good thing. Keeps people safe.”
She looked at him for a long moment, her expression softening just a little. “Maybe. But it also keeps people alone.”
Her words hit him harder than he’d expected, settling into some quiet place inside him he’d thought was long gone. He didn’t know how to respond, so he just nodded, feeling the weight of her gaze on him like a challenge.
After a beat, she gathered her laundry, folding it with careful practiced movements, her hands steady and precise. He watched her, mesmerized by the quiet grace in each gesture, the way she seemed to carry her world with her, self-contained and resilient.
As she turned to leave, she glanced back at him, something unreadable in her eyes. “Take care, Logan,” she said, her voice softer now. It wasn’t a question—it was a goodbye, or maybe a warning.
He swallowed, surprised that she’d remembered his name. “Yeah… you too.”
She lingered for a second, then gave him a small nod and walked out, leaving the faint scent of lavender and the echo of her words hanging in the air.
Logan watched her go, feeling the ache of something unfinished settle in his chest. He’d wanted to ask her more, to find out what kept her here, what kept her so guarded. But he knew better than to push.
As he turned back to the hum of the washing machines, he realized he’d be counting down the days until he saw her again.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
“Stryker’s pissed,” Wade muttered, slumping against the kitchen counter in their dingy apartment. The usual smirk was missing from his face, replaced by a look of weary frustration. “Doesn’t understand how, after two weeks, we haven’t found the guy.”
Logan leaned back against the counter, arms crossed, jaw tight. The truth was, he’d practically given up on the mission. They’d followed every lead, shaken down every contact, and come up with nothing. At this point, the search felt pointless. Hell, he could barely keep his head in the game—his mind kept drifting back to her. He hadn’t seen her in days, not since that run-in at the laundromat, and the silence from across the hall gnawed at him in a way he couldn’t explain.
“Tell him this shit takes time. We’ve done everything we can,” he said, the words coming out hollow. He didn’t have the energy to pretend anymore, not even for Wade.
Wade sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I already did. But, y’know, Stryker’s not exactly big on patience. Guy thinks we’re machines or something.” He shot Logan a sidelong glance, noticing the faraway look in his eyes. “You all right, man?”
Logan grunted, brushing him off. “I need a drink,” he muttered, grabbing his worn leather jacket from the back of the sofa and heading for the door. He didn’t look back, didn’t wait for Wade’s response. The apartment felt too cramped, too stale, and he needed air—needed a chance, maybe, to see her.
He made his way down the narrow stairwell, taking two steps at a time, the dim light casting shadows over the worn wallpaper. The bar was quieter than usual, only a handful of regulars hunched over their drinks, lost in their thoughts. Logan scanned the room, his heart pounding harder than he cared to admit. He’d been hoping, half-expecting, to see her. But she kept to herself so much that even catching a glimpse felt like chasing smoke.
Then he saw her, and his breath caught. There she was, standing behind the bar, her sleeves rolled up, pouring a whiskey into a lowball glass with practiced precision. The faint glow of the bar lights softened her face, giving her an almost ethereal look in the dimness. She didn’t notice him at first, focused on her work, and he took a second just to watch her, feeling that strange pull tighten in his chest.
He slid onto a stool at the bar, waiting until she looked up and caught sight of him. Her eyes flickered with recognition, a brief, surprised spark that quickly settled into something more guarded.
“Didn’t know you worked here,” he said, his voice low and gruff.
She gave a small, almost shy smile, setting the glass she’d just poured in front of an older man at the end of the bar. “Just part-time,” she replied. “Pays the bills.”
Logan nodded, glancing at the bottles lined up behind her. “Don’t suppose you’d join me for a drink?”
A faint smile tugged at the corner of her mouth, though there was something distant in her eyes. “I don’t drink,” she said, wiping down the counter with a cloth. “But I can pour you something strong if that’s what you need.”
He shrugged, trying to act casual. “Maybe I just wanted company.”
She paused, her hand stilling for a moment as she looked at him. “Rough day?”
Logan let out a humorless chuckle. “You could say that.” He hesitated, then added, “Work’s… complicated.”
She tilted her head, watching him with that quiet, steady gaze that always seemed to see right through him. “You don’t strike me as the kind of guy who likes talking about his job.”
“Not much to talk about,” he muttered, though he could feel the weight of it pressing on him, heavier than he wanted to admit. He took a deep breath, fingers tapping restlessly on the bar. “Let’s just say I’ve been chasing something that doesn’t want to be found.”
She nodded, her expression hardening just a bit. “Sometimes it’s better to let things go. Not everything needs to be caught.” Her words were gentle, but they struck something deep inside him, making him feel exposed in a way he wasn’t used to.
He ran a hand over his face, weary. “Yeah, maybe. Just… hard to walk away when you’ve got orders breathing down your neck.”
She arched an eyebrow, a hint of amusement breaking through her usual reserve. “So you’re the type who follows orders, huh?”
Logan smirked, shaking his head. “Not exactly. But sometimes you don’t get a choice.” He picked up his glass, taking a slow sip of the whiskey she’d poured, savoring the burn as it went down. “What about you? Seems like you don’t mind keeping to yourself.”
She shrugged, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m used to it. Less complicated that way.”
There was a pause, and he could sense something unspoken there, a hint of a story she wasn’t quite ready to tell. He felt an unexpected urge to ask, to push just a little, but he held back, afraid of scaring her off.
Instead, he said, “This place doesn’t exactly feel like… I don’t know. The kind of spot for someone who likes peace and quiet.”
She laughed softly, the sound warm and unexpected. “Probably not. But I don’t mind it here. It’s… predictable.” She looked down, fiddling with the edge of her towel, a small frown creasing her forehead. “I’ve had enough surprises for one lifetime.”
Logan watched her, feeling a pang of something he couldn’t name—sympathy, maybe, or just the strange, unexplainable need to understand her. “Yeah. I get that,” he murmured, surprising himself with how much he meant it. “I’m not much of a fan of surprises either.”
She glanced up, meeting his gaze, her expression softening. “Funny. Somehow, I think you’ve had your fair share.”
“More than I’d like,” he admitted, his voice barely a whisper. He wanted to tell her more, to somehow convey the weight he carried without unloading it all on her shoulders. But he was used to keeping that part of himself locked away. So instead, he just took another drink, feeling the burn of the whiskey like a familiar ache.
After a moment, she leaned on the bar, closer than she’d been before, and he caught a faint whiff of lavender—a soft, almost comforting scent that didn’t belong in a place like this. “For what it’s worth,” she said quietly, “you don’t seem like the kind of guy who belongs here.”
He looked up, caught off guard by her words. There was something raw in her gaze, something vulnerable she was letting him see, if only for a second. At that moment, he felt the urge to reach out, to say something real, something that might close the gap between them.
But the words stuck in his throat. All he could manage was a rough, “Yeah. Maybe neither of us do.”
She smiled faintly, a ghost of one, then straightened, the moment passing as quickly as it had come. “I should get back to work,” she said, her voice soft but distant again.
Logan nodded, watching as she moved down the bar to help another customer. The warmth she’d shown him vanished as she fell back into the rhythm of her job, her expression becoming neutral, polite, reserved.
He sat there for a while, nursing his drink, watching her from the corner of his eye. There was a part of him that wanted to wait until her shift ended, to walk her home, to find out more about the life she kept hidden behind that quiet, steady demeanor. But he knew better. They were both loners, both wary, both used to walls that kept the world at a distance.
Still, as he finally rose to leave, he couldn’t help but glance back one last time, catching her eye for a fleeting moment. There was something there—something unspoken, a silent understanding like they were both seeing the loneliness in each other.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
A door slammed somewhere down the hall, jolting Logan awake. He shot up, his senses immediately on high alert, ears ringing from the sudden noise. In this dump of an apartment building, chaos was as predictable as the peeling paint on the walls, but something about this was different. He felt it low in his gut—a tug of instinct that told him her door was the one that had slammed.
He didn’t even think twice. Rolling out of bed, he barely bothered to throw on a shirt, his sweatpants clinging to his legs as he stepped into the dimly lit hallway. The air was thick and stale, the smell of old carpet mingling with the faint, sour odor of cigarette smoke. Shadows pooled in the corners, and the weak fluorescent light flickered above, casting an eerie, washed-out glow over everything.
Logan froze when he spotted a lanky, rough-looking guy standing outside her door, his posture tense, fists clenched and white as he pounded on the wood.
“C’mon, let me in!” the guy snarled, his voice slurred and aggressive. “We’re not done talking!”
Logan’s jaw tightened, a surge of anger rising in his chest. He watched for a second, sizing the guy up—a wiry frame, greasy hair, clothes rumpled like he hadn’t changed in days. The man looked like trouble, the kind of guy who didn’t know when to take no for an answer. And if he was here banging on her door at this hour, that made him Logan’s problem.
Logan’s voice came out low and cold as he approached. “You wanna keep it down?”
The guy spun around, his eyes narrowing as he took in Logan’s broad shoulders, the scowl etched deep on his face. “Who the hell are you?” he sneered, but there was a flicker of hesitation, a hint of unease that Logan caught right away.
Logan took another step forward, crossing his arms over his bare chest. “I’m the guy who lives down the hall,” he said, his tone deadly calm. “And you’re about two seconds away from regretting that door you’re banging on.”
The guy’s sneer wavered, but he tried to puff himself up, stepping forward like he was going to make something of it. “This doesn’t concern you, man. I’m just trying to talk to my girl.”
“Doesn’t look like she wants to talk,” Logan replied, glancing at the door. His fists clenched instinctively. The thought of this guy forcing his way in, disturbing her, made his blood boil. “So maybe you should take the hint and get lost.”
The guy scoffed, but there was a nervous edge creeping into his voice now. “Look, we’re just… we’re going through some stuff. It’s none of your business.”
Logan took one more step, close enough that he could see the guy’s Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed. “Last warning. Leave. Or I make you leave.”
Before the guy could respond, the door opened a crack, and she appeared, her face pale and tense, eyes darting between Logan and this guy. “Logan, don’t. Please,” she said, her voice softer than usual but carrying a weight that made him pause. “It’s… it’s fine. I can handle it.”
Logan glanced at her, his irritation tempered by a flash of confusion. Handle it? The guy was practically foaming at the mouth, and she was telling him to back off.
The guy shot her a pleading look. “Come on, babe, just give me five minutes. We can talk this out.”
Her shoulders stiffened, and Logan could see the resolve in her eyes as she shook her head. “I already told you, we’re done. There’s nothing left to talk about. Just go.”
The guy didn’t budge, his face twisting with frustration. “You’re being unreasonable. This is all because of that stupid job, isn’t it? You think you’re too good for me now, huh?”
Logan felt his patience snap. He took a step forward, his voice a low growl. “She said go. Don’t make me tell you again.”
The guy’s eyes flicked back to Logan, the last traces of defiance draining out of him. For a second, he seemed to weigh his options, then cursed under his breath and turned, stalking down the hallway. He cast one last resentful glare over his shoulder before disappearing down the stairs.
As soon as he was out of sight, Logan turned back to her. She was leaning against the doorframe, her face tight with frustration. He opened his mouth to ask if she was all right, but she cut him off with a weary sigh.
“You didn’t need to do that,” she muttered, her eyes fixed somewhere near the floor.
Logan frowned. “Seemed like he wasn’t getting the message,” he replied, keeping his voice gentler than usual. “Didn’t look like he was gonna leave you alone.”
She crossed her arms, hugging herself as if trying to put some barrier between them. “I just… I didn’t want to make things worse. He’s already been hanging around too much as it is, and now—” She trailed off, looking away, clearly uncomfortable.
Logan’s brows furrowed. He’d come out here ready to throw the guy down the stairs if it came to that, but now he was starting to see the other side of it. “Is he…?” Logan paused, not sure how to phrase it. “Your boyfriend?”
She shook her head quickly. “No–I mean he was, sort of. Not anymore.” She hesitated, biting her lip. “He’s just… he doesn’t know when to let go.”
Logan felt a flash of anger on her behalf, a protective instinct flaring up inside him. “If he gives you any more trouble, you let me know. I’ll make sure he stays gone.”
Instead of relief, his words seemed to frustrate her. She let out a soft huff, rubbing her temples. “Logan, I don’t need a knight in shining armor. This is… complicated. He’s just going through something. It doesn’t matter—” Her voice trailed off leaving the silence to hang between them.
Logan clenched his jaw, forcing himself to take a step back. He wasn’t used to being told to stand down, especially when he felt someone needed his help. But he could see this only made her more anxious, that his interference was complicating things for her in ways he hadn’t anticipated.
“Fine,” he said, though it took effort to keep his voice steady. “But if he shows up again, I’m not gonna just sit by and watch him bother you.”
She looked at him, her expression softening for a moment. There was a flicker of gratitude in her eyes, tempered by weariness. “Thanks, Logan. I appreciate it. Really, but it won’t make things easier. He’ll just think—I just don’t want any more problems, okay?” 
He nodded, feeling a pang of something he couldn’t quite name. He’d wanted to protect her, to do something useful, but it seemed all he’d managed was to add to her stress. “Got it,” he said quietly.
She gave him a small, tentative smile, then turned back to her apartment. As she shut the door, he caught one last glimpse of her expression—tired, guarded, but grateful, like she was carrying the weight of more than just a bad ex.
Logan stood there for a long moment, staring at her closed door, hands clenched at his sides. He hadn’t realized how deeply he’d started to care until he’d felt that surge of anger seeing someone else give her trouble. But now he could feel her boundaries, a line she’d drawn that he hadn’t meant to cross.
Turning back to his apartment, he couldn’t shake the frustration coiled tight in his chest, or the quiet ache that came with knowing there were parts of her life he couldn’t protect her from.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
“You and that girl—have you made any progress?” Wade asked, a smirk playing on his lips as he took a lazy sip of his beer. They were sitting in their usual corner of the bar, ostensibly keeping an eye out for any sign of their elusive target. But Wade’s attention, as usual, had drifted to more entertaining topics.
Logan huffed, eyes scanning the room. “What did I tell you, Wade? I don’t want to talk about that.”
“Sensitive subject, big guy?” Wade’s grin only widened, clearly enjoying himself. “C’mon, I’m just saying—you’ve been pining after her like a lovesick puppy for weeks now. You’re not exactly subtle.”
Logan shot him a glare that could’ve cut steel, but Wade just shrugged, unbothered. “Look, I’ve got a way with the ladies. Maybe I can help you out.”
“Don’t even think about it,” Logan growled, his voice low and dangerous.
Wade wasn’t listening. His eyes lit up as the door opened, and she walked in, pulling on her apron as she headed behind the bar. Logan tried not to stare, but he felt that familiar pull in his chest, his gaze drawn to her almost against his will. She looked tired, a little more reserved than usual, like something heavy was weighing on her mind. He couldn’t help but wonder if her ex had been causing her trouble again. He clenched his fists, resisting the urge to ask, to do something to make it better.
That’s when Wade got up.
Logan’s stomach tightened as Wade strolled across the bar, his usual cocky swagger on full display. He watched, jaw clenched, as Wade leaned on the bar, flashing her one of his trademark grins. She looked up, startled at first, and Logan saw her eyes flick briefly toward him before settling back on Wade. Her expression softened into a polite, practiced smile, the kind she gave every customer. But Wade wasn’t satisfied with politeness.
He couldn’t hear exactly what Wade was saying due to his jealousy overtaking his senses, but he saw her give a small, hesitant laugh, the kind that looked like she was just being polite. That didn’t matter—Wade was relentless, leaning in closer, gesturing animatedly, probably telling some ridiculous story. After a few moments, Logan saw her laugh again, this time a little more genuine, her shoulders relaxing just a fraction.
Logan’s fingers tightened around his glass, the jealousy hitting him like a punch to the gut. He tried to ignore it, tried to tell himself it was nothing—just Wade being Wade. But he couldn’t tear his eyes away from them, his jaw clenched so hard it hurt.
Wade, sensing the effect he was having, shot a glance back at Logan, a smug grin flashing across his face before he turned back to her. Logan’s chest tightened. That bastard. He’d walked over there just to rile him up, and damn it, it was working.
Wade said something else, something that made her laugh again—this time a little louder, though Logan could tell it was still half-hearted, a courtesy laugh to appease the charming stranger who’d decided to bother her during her shift. She wasn’t truly engaged, but the sight of her laughing, even out of politeness, stirred something dark and possessive in Logan’s gut.
He forced himself to look away, taking a long drink to steady himself, but the sound of her laugh lingered, scratching at him. Wade was still leaning on the bar, still talking to her, probably laying it on thick just to make Logan squirm. Logan couldn’t help the flash of irritation that surged through him. It wasn’t like he’d made a claim on her or anything—but seeing Wade so close, making her laugh, it grated on him in a way he hadn’t expected.
After a few agonizing minutes, Wade finally sauntered back over, plopping down across from Logan with a satisfied smirk. Logan’s jaw was still clenched, his gaze flickering over to where she was now wiping down the bar, her expression already back to that familiar, guarded neutrality.
Wade raised an eyebrow, leaning in with a grin. “You see that? Had her laughing in no time. It’s called charm, my friend. You should try it sometime.”
Logan glared at him, his voice low and dangerous. “Cut the crap, Wade.”
“Oh, come on,” Wade chuckled, leaning back with a look of pure amusement. “Don’t be so uptight. If you’re not gonna make a move, someone else will.”
Logan’s fists tightened, and he forced himself to take a slow, steadying breath. “This isn’t a game, Wade.”
Wade shrugged, unbothered. “Never said it was. Just seems like you’re too busy brooding over her from a distance to actually, y’know, do anything.” He leaned in, voice dropping to a mocking whisper. “You afraid she’ll turn you down? Big, tough Logan afraid of a pretty girl?”
Logan’s nostrils flared, a quiet anger simmering in his chest, but he held back. He wasn’t going to give Wade the satisfaction of a reaction. Instead, he let his gaze drift back to her, watching as she moved behind the bar, her face calm but distant, like she was deliberately shutting herself off from everything around her.
The truth was, Wade wasn’t entirely wrong. Logan had been keeping his distance, unsure how to approach her, especially with everything going on in her life. He didn’t want to be another complication, another person who made things harder for her. But watching Wade talk to her, seeing that faint, forced smile on her face—it made him realize just how badly he wanted to be the one making her smile, not out of politeness or obligation, but because she actually wanted him there.
Wade leaned in, still smirking. “So? What’s the plan, big guy? You gonna sit here and sulk, or you gonna actually talk to her?”
Logan’s gaze snapped back to him, irritation flaring. “Unlike you, I don’t go around sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong.”
“Hey, I was just being friendly,” Wade said, raising his hands in mock innocence. “You know, she’s pretty nice once you get her to open up a little. Thought I’d do you a favor, warm her up for you.”
Logan scoffed, but he couldn’t hide the bitterness in his tone. “She’s not some conquest, Wade.”
Wade rolled his eyes. “Relax, old man. I’m not trying to steal her. Just trying to get you to wake up and do something about it before she slips away.” He glanced back toward the bar, where she was now stacking glasses, oblivious to their conversation. “You think she’s gonna wait around forever? Women like that don’t stay single long.”
Logan’s jaw clenched, his heart pounding with a mixture of frustration and jealousy he couldn’t shake. He took another sip of his drink, forcing himself to keep his gaze on anything else instead of glancing her way again. The truth was, Wade’s words struck too close to home. He’d been holding back, convincing himself that he had time, that he didn’t need to rush things. But seeing her with someone else—even Wade—made him realize how thin that excuse really was.
After a moment, Logan set his glass down, his eyes cold and hard. “You don’t know the first thing about her, Wade.”
Wade shrugged, unfazed. “Maybe not. But neither do you, at this rate.” He flashed another grin, leaning back in his seat. “Look, you’re not gonna scare me off with your brooding, so maybe just… I don’t know, think about it. You might find that going over there and actually talking to her works better than glaring at me.”
Logan didn’t respond, but his gaze drifted back to her, watching as she moved with quiet efficiency, her expression carefully blank. He could still hear her forced laugh echoing in his head, the way she’d seemed to tolerate Wade’s attention rather than welcome it.
With a resigned sigh, he pushed himself to his feet. If Wade wasn’t going to back off, maybe it was time to take matters into his own hands.
He didn’t know what he was going to say, but he knew one thing for sure: he couldn’t sit around and let someone else fill the space he’d been too afraid to claim.
Logan slid onto the bar stool in front of her, his presence a solid weight she couldn’t ignore, even though she kept her eyes down, focused on wiping an already-clean spot on the counter. She looked up briefly, her gaze flicking to him before darting away, a faint, polite smile barely gracing her lips.
“Hey,” he said, his voice gruff but softer than usual.
“Hi.” She answered quietly, her eyes settling somewhere over his shoulder, anywhere but on him. Her hands kept busy, her movements almost mechanical as she straightened the bottles on the bar and rearranged the napkins as if his presence alone made her feel she had to be doing something.
Logan felt a pang of something uncomfortably close to regret. He wasn’t used to this—a woman shrinking away from him, putting up walls before he’d even had a chance to say his piece. The memory of her ex banging on her door flashed through his mind, and he shifted uncomfortably, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Look, about the other night,” he began, voice rougher than he intended. “I… I didn’t mean to, y’know, step in like that. I just thought—well, it seemed like you needed help.”
She finally looked at him, her gaze sharp and guarded, like she was measuring each word before letting it reach her. “It’s fine,” she said flatly, her tone clipped. “I can handle my own problems.”
Logan swallowed, feeling the rejection like a slap. He knew she was brushing him off, trying to make him back down, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to let it go. “Didn’t mean to imply you couldn’t,” he muttered, his voice softer. “Just… didn’t want to see you put in a bad spot.”
She let out a small, humorless laugh, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as she busied herself with the glasses on the bar. “Bad spots are part of the package around here, Logan. You don’t need to make it your business.”
He leaned forward slightly, brow furrowing. “Maybe I just don’t like seeing you get hurt.” The words came out more intense than he’d intended, and he saw her stiffen, her hands pausing mid-reach. She looked up, really looked at him, a flash of something unreadable in her eyes—surprise, maybe, or irritation. It was hard to tell.
She took a breath, visibly collecting herself. “Logan… I appreciate the concern, really. But I’m fine.” Her voice was steady but distant like she was pulling herself back behind a wall he couldn’t get through. “This kind of thing… it’s not new to me.”
That didn’t sit right with him, the idea of her having to handle men like her ex, people who didn’t take no for an answer. He wanted to ask her more, to understand what kind of trouble she’d been through, but he knew that line was dangerous. Respect her space, he reminded himself, even as the urge to push gnawed at him.
But he couldn’t help himself. “You don’t… you don’t have anyone else to look out for you?”
Her gaze flicked to him, sharper now, her eyes narrowing. “What do you mean by that?”
“Just…” He faltered, feeling himself starting to drown in the weight of his awkwardness. “You don’t seem to have anyone around. Family, friends. Someone who could back you up if things got rough.”
She stared at him for a long, tense moment, her expression unreadable. Then she let out a slow, controlled exhale, setting down the glass she’d been wiping with careful deliberation. “Logan, you don’t know me. And frankly, I don’t know you. You and your friend…” She paused, glancing over at Wade, who was lounging at the other end of the bar, eyeing them with an amused grin. “You both keep… hovering. And it’s starting to feel a little strange.”
Logan’s jaw tightened and a wave of frustration and embarrassment crashed over him. “It’s not like that,” he muttered, a bit too defensively. “We’re just… we’re just looking out for you. This place isn’t exactly safe.”
She raised an eyebrow, folding her arms across her chest. “And you think I don’t know that? You think I don’t understand the risks of living here?”
Logan opened his mouth to respond, then closed it, his words failing him. He realized he’d overstepped, pushed too far without thinking. She didn’t need a protector, at least not one who bulldozed into her life without an invitation. And yet, here he was, sitting at her bar, trying to fix things he barely understood.
“I’m just saying…” He trailed off, his voice softer, almost hesitant. “I see you here, night after night, putting up with jerks who don’t know when to quit. You’re not like them. You deserve better.”
Her expression softened, but only slightly, and she glanced away, a distant look in her eyes. “Better,” she murmured, almost to herself. “Right.” She looked back at him, meeting his gaze with something close to resignation. “I don’t need saving, Logan. I’ve been doing just fine without it.”
He swallowed, hating how small those words made him feel. He���d faced down enemies, been through battles that left him scarred in ways she couldn’t imagine, but sitting here under her gaze, he felt exposed, clumsy, like he was fumbling in the dark.
She sighed, glancing down, and for a moment, he saw a hint of vulnerability in her expression—a crack in her armor. “Why are you really here?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper. “Why are you and your friend even bothering with me? I’m just… some bartender.”
Logan hesitated, feeling Wade’s eyes on him from across the room, knowing he was probably getting a kick out of watching him squirm. But this was more than just Wade’s meddling. This was him, unable to walk away, pulled back to her time and time again for reasons he couldn’t explain.
“You’re not ‘just’ anything,” he said finally, his voice low, but steady. “You’re… different. Strong. I don’t know.” He ran a hand through his hair, frustrated with himself. “I know I’m not good with words, but… I see you here, and I just keep thinking you deserve more than this.”
She looked at him, her guarded expression softening, and for a brief moment, he thought he saw something crack beneath the surface—a glimmer of vulnerability, something raw and unguarded. But then, just as quickly, she pulled back, straightening, her walls going up again.
“Oh, so I’m a charity case now?” she murmured, her voice tight and distant, the hint of anger simmering beneath her words. She crossed her arms, shifting her weight as she looked him over, her gaze cold and appraising. “Look, I told you—I don’t need anyone looking out for me, especially not some guy who doesn’t know when he’s made someone uncomfortable.”
The words hit him like a punch to the gut, each one sinking in deep. Logan’s mouth opened, but no words came out. He felt his face go hot, a mix of shame and frustration twisting inside him. He wanted to explain himself, to tell her he hadn’t meant it that way—but the look on her face told him that anything he said now would only make things worse.
“I—” he started, then stopped, swallowing hard. She kept her eyes on him, unblinking, her expression hard as steel. He could see it now—the line he’d crossed, the space he’d invaded without thinking. He’d thought he was helping, protecting her, but all he’d done was make her feel trapped.
She took a breath, exhaling slowly as she glanced away, her jaw clenched. “You don’t get it, do you?” she said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. “Guys like you think you’re doing me a favor, stepping in, trying to… ‘protect’ me. But all you’re doing is making me feel like I can’t handle my own life. Like I’m weak. And I’m not.”
Logan clenched his fists under the bar, forcing himself to stay quiet, to listen. He’d been on the other side of this before—people assuming things about him, trying to fix things they didn’t understand. Now, for the first time, he realized he was doing the same thing to her. He looked down, shame tightening in his chest.
She shook her head, a bitter smile tugging at her lips. “You barely know me, Logan. You have no idea what I’ve been through. And I’m not interested in becoming some project for you to fix or some one-night stand.”
Her words stung, cutting through the last shreds of his defensiveness. He’d been telling himself he was looking out for her, that she needed someone to stand up for her. But now he could see how it must have looked to her—some guy she barely knew, showing up again and again, prying into her life, acting like he knew better.
He cleared his throat, voice rough. “You’re right,” he said quietly, finally meeting her gaze. “I… I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.”
She watched him, her eyes softened just a fraction, though the wariness remained. He could feel the weight of his own mistakes pressing down on him, making him feel clumsy and exposed.
“Look,” she said, her tone gentler but still guarded, “I appreciate whatever it is you’re trying to do. Really. But you don’t get to decide what I need. That’s my choice. And if I want help, I’ll ask for it.”
He nodded slowly, feeling a strange mix of relief and regret. He could sense the walls she’d put up, and he knew now that he was part of the reason they were there.
He stood up, feeling the weight of her words settle over him like a cold ache. “Right. Sorry if we made things weird,” he muttered, his voice gruffer than he intended. “Didn’t mean to… overstep.”
For the first time, she seemed to soften, her gaze losing some of its hardness. She let out a long breath, looking down at the bar as if collecting her thoughts. When she spoke again, her voice was almost kind, but there was an edge to it, a reminder.
“Just… maybe think twice before you go around trying to be someone’s hero,” she said, her lips curving into a faint, sad smile.
Logan felt the weight of her words settle over him, heavier than anything he’d carried in a long time. He nodded, swallowing back the urge to say more. For once, he knew he needed to let her have the last word.
She turned away, her attention shifting to a group of customers at the other end of the bar. She moved with quiet efficiency, her shoulders tense but steady, shutting him out completely.
Logan stood there for a moment, feeling the full sting of her rejection, the ache of realizing he’d overstepped in ways he couldn’t take back. She didn’t look at him again, didn’t acknowledge his presence, and he knew he’d lost whatever fragile connection they’d had.
“Smooth, as always,” Wade drawled, leaning back with an infuriating grin.
Logan ignored him, his jaw clenched tight as he sat down. He’d thought he was protecting her but all he’d done was drive her further away. 
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
The past few days, Logan had kept a low profile, barely leaving the apartment except to grab food or take out the trash. He didn’t want to risk running into her—not after the way she’d shut him down, her words echoing in his mind like a bruise that wouldn’t fade. She’d made it perfectly clear that she didn’t need his help, and he’d gotten the message. Loud and clear.
But tonight, Wade had barged in with new intel from Stryker. Apparently, their elusive journalist was on the move, spotted hanging around one of the local clubs. Logan hadn’t been in the mood to play dress-up and join the nightlife, but he didn’t have much choice. Stryker was breathing down their necks, and if this was their best shot at tracking the guy down, he couldn’t let it slip by.
So he’d reluctantly thrown on a clean shirt and made the walk a few blocks down to the club, Wade at his side, chattering nonstop as they reached the entrance.
“It’s a bit nicer than the bar we live above,” Wade noted, casting a glance around the neon-lit exterior with approval. A line of people waited outside, all glittering dresses and sharp suits, laughter, and perfume filling the warm night air. Wade smirked, nudging Logan with his elbow. “Maybe if you’re lucky, you can find another pretty girl to make up for your last crash-and-burn.”
Logan rolled his eyes, ignoring Wade’s jab. “We’re here to find the journalist. Stay focused,” he muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets as they made their way inside. The club was dimly lit, pulsing with low red and blue lights that throbbed to the beat of the music. Bodies moved on the dance floor, a tangle of arms and laughter and heat, and Logan felt a familiar irritation simmering under his skin. Clubs weren’t his scene. Too loud, too crowded, too many damn people.
He forced himself to concentrate, sniffing the air, trying to pick up any hint of their target’s scent. But the mix of sweat, cologne, and spilled alcohol made it nearly impossible to pick up anything distinctive. He scanned the crowd, his eyes narrowing as he tried to catch sight of anyone who looked remotely like the guy they were hunting.
But then he saw her.
At first, he thought he was imagining it—a trick of the lights, or just his mind playing cruel games. But no. It was her, standing near the edge of the dance floor, laughing at something some woman was saying. She looked… different. Completely different from the guarded, quiet bartender he’d met. Her hair was loose, falling in soft waves over her shoulders, and her lips were painted a glossy, tempting shade that caught the light every time she smiled. She wore a dress that hugged her curves in all the right places, showing off a side of her he’d never seen before, a side he hadn’t even known existed.
Logan’s mouth went dry, and for a moment, he forgot why he was even there. All he could think about was her—the way she moved, the easy smile on her face, the way her laughter seemed to cut through the noise of the club like it was meant for him alone. He’d been trying to avoid her, trying to keep his distance, but seeing her like this, carefree and vibrant… pulled him in, like a magnet he couldn’t resist.
Wade must have noticed his distraction, because he gave Logan a light smack on the shoulder, pulling him out of his trance. “Logan, buddy, don’t tell me you’re still stuck on her,” Wade said, his tone half-amused, half-annoyed. “I swear, I’ve never seen you this pathetic over anyone. Rejection’s hitting you hard, huh?”
Logan shook his head, forcing himself to tear his gaze away, though his eyes kept drifting back to her. “It’s not like that,” he muttered, more to himself than to Wade. “We’re here for the journalist. Just… keep your eyes open.”
Wade wasn’t buying it. He crossed his arms, smirking. “Oh, I’m keeping my eyes open, all right. You, on the other hand…” He whistled, nodding in her direction. “You’re about one second away from abandoning the mission to go talk to her. I mean, come on. If you’re that obsessed, just go over there already.”
Logan clenched his jaw, resisting the urge to punch Wade then and there. But a part of him hated that Wade was right. He hadn’t been able to get her out of his head since their last conversation, and now, seeing her like this, he was barely holding himself back.
Before he could talk himself out of it, he started making his way across the crowded floor, ignoring Wade’s low chuckle behind him. As he approached, she turned slightly, her gaze sweeping over the crowd until it landed on him. Her smile faltered, surprise flickering in her eyes before she quickly masked it, her face shifting into something more guarded.
“Logan,” she said, her tone cautious, almost as if she were bracing herself. “Didn’t expect to see you here.”
He cleared his throat, suddenly feeling out of place, unsure what to say. “Yeah. Didn’t expect to see you either,” he replied, his voice gruffer than he intended. “You… uh, you look different.” He instantly regretted it, realizing how awkward it sounded.
She raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms. “Different?”
“Good different,” he amended quickly, his cheeks warming. Real smooth, Logan, he thought, mentally kicking himself. 
She glanced away, a faint frown tugging at her lips.“Thanks I guess,” she said, then gestured to her friend, who was watching the exchange with barely concealed interest. “I’m just here with my friend, Monica. She thought it was a good idea for girls’ night and dragged me out.” He could see a flash of uncomfortableness before she masked it.
Logan nodded, his mind racing, trying to think of something to say that wouldn’t make him sound like a fool. But before he could gather his thoughts, her friend nudged her playfully, smirking at Logan.
“So, this is the guy you told me about?” Monica asked, her eyes dancing with mischief.
She shot Monica a warning look, her cheeks flushing. “I… I didn’t tell you that much,” she muttered, casting a quick, embarrassed glance at Logan.
A flicker of hope stirred in his chest. She talked about me? He tried not to let it show, but the thought sent a spark through him, making him stand a little straighter.
Monica gave her a knowing smile, then leaned closer to Logan, lowering her voice. “Just so you know, she’s been playing hard to get for a reason. But maybe she’s finally ready to let someone in.”
Logan looked at her, the guarded woman he’d met behind the bar now looking distinctly uncomfortable, her cheeks flushed a warm pink. She looked away, biting her lip, and he realized she was just as thrown off-balance as he was.
For a moment, they stood in silence, the thrum of the club’s music pulsing around them, the energy of the room fading into the background. All he could see was her—her flushed cheeks, the slight nervousness in her gaze, the softness in her expression that he’d never seen before.
Monica sighed dramatically, looking between them with a mischievous glint in her eye. “Oh, look at that. I need another drink,” she announced, clearly not needing one at all. She winked at her friend. “Plus, I think I see a cute guy over there. You two… have fun.” With one last grin, she slipped away, disappearing into the crowd and leaving them alone.
Logan took a steadying breath, forcing himself to look her in the eyes, to say what he’d been meaning to since their last conversation. “Listen… about the other night,” he began, voice low and careful. “I’m sorry if I overstepped. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
She hesitated, searching his face. He held her gaze, hoping she could see he meant it. For a moment, he thought he saw the walls she kept around herself soften, just a little. “I know you didn’t mean anything by it,” she said softly, her voice barely carrying over the thrum of the music. “It’s just… I’m not used to people getting involved in my life.”
Logan nodded, understanding more than he could put into words. “I’m not exactly used to… letting people in either.” The confession felt strange on his tongue, vulnerable in a way he hadn’t planned, but it was the truth. He could see that she understood, her expression shifting from guarded to something softer, that made his heart beat a little faster.
They stood there, inches apart, the pulse of the club and the chatter of people fading into the background. Logan wanted to reach out, to touch her hand, to bridge that last bit of distance between them, but he held back, waiting for her lead.
After a moment, she gave him a tentative smile. “Did Wade drag you out here?” she asked, the tension easing just a bit as a hint of humor crept into her voice.
Logan chuckled, shaking his head. “What makes you think that?”
She shrugged, glancing away shyly. “You don’t… you’re like me,” she said, fumbling over her words. “I just didn’t think you’d be the kind of guy who’d want to go to a club.”
He smiled, trying to put her at ease. “I go to bars all the time. Almost the same thing, right?”
She let out a small, nervous laugh. “Yeah, I suppose so. I don’t drink, but Monica always drags me out, says it’s ‘good for me.’” She made air quotes, rolling her eyes slightly.
“I know.” Logan’s face went hot. “I mean, I remember you don’t drink. That’s why… well, I guess that’s why I was surprised to see you here.” He cleared his throat, trying to regain his footing. “But you look… different tonight.”
She raised an eyebrow, her expression growing cautious. “You already said that. Do you make it a habit to repeat yourself?”
Logan fumbled for the right words, suddenly feeling like a teenager on his first date. “I mean…you look beautiful tonight,” he said, his voice rougher than he intended. His gaze flicked over her, taking her in again.
She went very still, her eyes searching his face. For a second, he thought he’d finally broken through to her, that maybe she could see how much he meant it. But then her expression shifted, her lips pressing together, her eyes hardening. She looked down, and he could see her shoulders tense, her arms wrapping around herself as if she were closing off.
“Oh,” she said quietly, a forced, brittle smile tugging at her lips. “So… what? I only look beautiful when I’m dressed up? When I’m… like this?”
Logan’s eyes widened, realization hitting him like a slap. “No—no, that’s not what I meant.”
She shook her head, her voice barely a whisper as she looked away. “I knew it was stupid to come out tonight,” she muttered, more to herself than to him. “Guess I’m just someone you feel sorry for? Want to just take pity on?”
“Hey, no—” Logan reached for her arm instinctively, but she pulled back, her face turning away to hide the tears welling in her eyes. The sight made his chest tighten, guilt flooding him as he realized just how badly he’d misstepped.
“I thought maybe…” Her voice cracked, and she shook her head, brushing a hand quickly across her cheek. “Never mind.” She looked back at him, her eyes glossy, her expression one of hurt and frustration. “Forget it, Logan. I don’t need this.”
“Wait,” he said, desperate now, his voice thick with regret. “It’s not pity. I just… I wanted you to know that I—”
She didn’t let him finish. With a tight, broken smile, she turned on her heel, pushing her way through the crowd and disappearing into the pulsing mass of bodies on the dance floor. He stood there, frozen, watching her slip away, her silhouette vanishing into the blur of lights and movement.
Logan felt an ache settle deep in his chest, the weight of her words sinking in. He’d tried so hard to find the right thing to say, to make her see how he felt—but all he’d done was confirm her worst fears, making her feel like he only saw her worth when she was dressed up, made up, transformed into someone she thought he’d want.
He stood there for a moment, lost in the noise and the lights, feeling the regret gnawing at him like a wound that wouldn’t heal.
Behind him, Wade sidled up, taking in Logan’s expression with a low whistle. “Well, that looked like it went well.”
Logan glared at him, too frustrated to respond. Wade shook his head, crossing his arms with a smirk. “Man, you’re really a disaster with women, you know that?”
Logan clenched his fists, ignoring Wade’s taunts as he scanned the crowd, hoping for another glimpse of her, even though he knew she wouldn’t want to see him right now. He’d messed up, probably worse than he’d ever messed up anything before. But he couldn’t just leave it like this. Not when she was the one person he couldn’t get out of his mind.
Without a word to Wade, he pushed through the crowd, determination hardening in his chest. He didn’t know how he was going to fix this, but he knew one thing—he wasn’t going to let her slip away again. Not like this.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
Logan spotted her near the dimly lit hallway by the bathrooms, sitting on the floor with her legs curled up to her chest, her face buried in her arms. The sight stopped him. She looked so small, so vulnerable, and the thought that he’d been the one to put that hurt in her eyes twisted something painful inside him. He knew he should leave her alone—she’d already told him to. But he couldn’t. Not when he felt the ache of her words as if they’d been carved into him.
He took a cautious step closer, clearing his throat. “Hey… I’m sorry,” he murmured, voice barely audible over the muffled thump of music from the club. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
She looked up, her eyes red and swollen from crying, and the guilt hit him all over again. Her gaze was sharp, guarded, but there was a flicker of something softer beneath it—a weariness like she was tired of feeling this way.
“Just go away, Logan,” she said, her voice wavering as she hugged her knees tighter. “Haven’t you done enough?”
He wanted to reach out, to touch her shoulder, anything to make this right, but he held back, forcing himself to respect her space. “Please,” he said, his voice rough. “Just… hear me out. I didn’t mean it like that.”
She let out a bitter laugh, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. “It’s not your fault,” she said, cutting him off. Her voice was shaky and raw, but there was a surprising steadiness underneath like she was trying to take control of her pain. “I… I overthink things. I read too much into what people say.”
Logan shook his head, his brow furrowing. “But I should’ve been more careful with my words. I—”
“It’s not about you, Logan,” she interrupted, her gaze dropping to the floor. She took a shaky breath as if she were forcing herself to let him see a piece of herself she usually kept hidden. “All my life, I’ve only ever felt… I don’t know, noticed… when I was all dressed up. People would tell me I was beautiful, but only when I was like this,” she gestured to her dress, her makeup, the polished version of herself that she’d put on tonight. “And somewhere along the line, I guess I just started to believe that’s all there was to me. That if I wasn’t done up, I didn’t… matter.”
Logan’s chest tightened as he listened, his discomfort fading in the face of her honesty. He understood, more than she realized. He knew what it felt like to wear a mask, to be seen in a way that didn’t match who you were.
“Look, I get it,” he said softly, his voice thick. “I know what it’s like to feel like… like you’re on the outside. Like people only see a part of you and ignore the rest.”
She let out a short, almost bitter laugh, her gaze flicking over him, taking in the rugged, handsome man who had sat next to her. “You? An outsider?” she said, the skepticism clear in her voice. “Come on, Logan. Look at you. How could someone like you know what it feels like to not… fit?”
He swallowed, feeling the old scars hidden beneath the surface ache in response to her words. “You’d be surprised,” he murmured, his gaze distant for a moment as he stared at the wall across from them. “People see what they want to see. This…” He gestured vaguely to himself, his broad shoulders, his gruff exterior. “It’s just armor. Doesn’t mean I fit in. Doesn’t mean I feel at home anywhere.”
She went quiet, studying him with a new kind of curiosity, like she was seeing a side of him she hadn’t expected. Her expression softened, and for a moment, the two of them sat in silence, the thumping bass of the club seeming to fade into the background, leaving them in their own little world.
“I didn’t know…” she whispered finally, her voice barely audible.
Logan shrugged, his gaze dropping to his hands. “I’m not saying it’s the same. Just… I get it. You feel like you have to be something else, just to be seen. But you don’t. You’re worth a hell of a lot more than some fancy dress and makeup.”
She blinked, looking down, her fingers twisting nervously in her lap. “I… I don’t know how to believe that,” she admitted, her voice so quiet he almost didn’t hear it.
He felt a strange surge of protectiveness, an urge to make her see herself the way he did. “You don’t have to believe it all at once,” he said softly. “Just… start small. You’re here, right? That’s a start.”
She looked up at him, a faint glimmer of hope mixed with hesitation in her eyes. “You really think so?”
Logan nodded, his gaze steady and unwavering. “Yeah. I do.” He hesitated, then added, “And for what it’s worth, I didn’t mean that you’re only beautiful like this. I meant… I just meant that you looked happy. You looked… free. That’s what I saw.”
A soft, surprised smile tugged at her lips, and he felt a flicker of relief, like maybe, just maybe, he hadn’t ruined everything.
“I guess… I guess I did feel a little free tonight,” she admitted, her voice tentative, like she was still testing the idea out.
They sat there in silence for a moment, just looking at each other, the air between them charged with something unspoken. Logan felt the weight of her gaze, his eyes shifting to look down at her glossy lips. He didn’t understand why it stirred something deep inside him. 
Finally, she looked away, clearing her throat. “Thanks,” she murmured, glancing up at him with a tentative smile. “For… understanding. And for not letting me just sit here feeling sorry for myself.”
“Anytime,” Logan replied, his voice a soft, steady rumble, grounding her.
They stayed like that, close enough for him to feel the warmth of her shoulder, neither of them moving to fill the space between them. It was rare for him to feel like this—like he could just be here, be himself, and have that be enough. She seemed to relax, letting herself breathe in his presence, a hint of comfort settling into her expression.
But then her friend’s voice sliced through the moment, loud and slightly tipsy, echoing down the hallway. “There you are!” Monica stumbled to a halt, her eyes narrowing the second she noticed the red around her friend’s eyes, the tear tracks still faintly visible on her cheeks. Monica’s gaze shot to Logan, her eyes flashing with instant, protective suspicion. “What the hell? Did this guy—”
She quickly got to her feet, hands up in reassurance, cheeks flushing. “No, no, it’s fine,” she said, glancing back at Logan with an apologetic look. “Logan didn’t do anything.”
Monica crossed her arms, one eyebrow raised skeptically. “You swear? Because I’m pretty sure I could kick his ass, even if he’s big.”
Logan almost laughed, but he held back, just giving a slight shake of his head. “I’m harmless,” he muttered, though the hint of a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth.
Monica narrowed her eyes, looking between them with obvious doubt. “Fine. I’ll let it go… for now.” She slipped her arm around her friend’s shoulders, lowering her voice. “But hey, I found someone way more fun than this brooding guy. He’s tall, dark, and cute as hell,” Monica said, shooting Logan a sideways look. “Let’s go, yeah?”
She hesitated, her gaze flickering back to Logan, lingering there for a moment. He could see the indecision in her eyes, the hint of a question, like she wasn’t entirely ready to walk away. Part of him wanted to reach out, to tell her to stay, to keep talking, but he bit the words back. He knew she didn’t owe him anything, and he wasn’t about to guilt her into staying.
She gave him a small, reluctant smile, a little sad around the edges. “I… I’ll see you around, Logan,” she said softly like she wasn’t entirely sure.
“Yeah,” he replied, doing his best to keep his voice steady. “Take care.”
With one last glance, she let Monica tug her back toward the crowded, neon-lit main room, disappearing into the sea of people. Logan stayed where he was, the ache in his chest unfamiliar and raw. He hadn’t wanted to let her go, but he’d seen the uncertainty in her eyes, the pull between her friend and whatever connection they’d shared just moments before. And he couldn’t blame her for choosing the friend who’d stood by her through who-knew-what, instead of the stranger who’d stumbled into her life.
He let out a long breath, running a hand through his hair. He’d almost forgotten why he was even here, but the reality of it settled back over him like a cold splash of water. The mission. The damn journalist.
Reluctantly, he pushed himself off the wall, heading back into the main area to find Wade, hoping he’d at least managed to keep his eye on their target. But as he scanned the crowd, a familiar laugh caught his attention, coming from the back corner of the club.
He sighed, already knowing what he’d find.
Sure enough, Wade was slouched in a booth with some girl draped over him, her fingers tangled in his hair, her lipstick smudged against his cheek. They were laughing, Wade’s arm wrapped possessively around her waist, clearly oblivious to everything else.
Logan clenched his fists, feeling a fresh wave of irritation rise. He pushed through the crowd and stopped in front of the booth, crossing his arms. “We’re supposed to be working, remember?”
Wade looked up, still grinning, completely unbothered. “Oh, hey, Logan!” he slurred, throwing an arm out as if he were inviting Logan to join in on the fun. “Lighten up, man. Haven’t seen you all night. What, were you off getting cozy with your lady friend?”
Logan’s jaw tightened. “We have a job to do, Wade. You know, finding the journalist? Stryker’s going to be thrilled if we come back empty-handed because you were too busy making out in the corner.”
Wade just laughed, leaning back with a lazy grin. “Relax, Logan. We’ve been chasing this guy for weeks, and he hasn’t shown up once. If he’s even here, he’s not coming out till way later. Might as well have a little fun while we wait.”
Logan shot a glare at Wade’s “date,” who giggled and nuzzled closer, clearly not bothered by the tension. He felt his patience snap, his frustration boiling over. All night, he’d been on edge, caught between his need to finish the job and the emotions he couldn’t quite bury when it came to her. And now here was Wade, throwing it all away for a quick thrill.
“Fine,” Logan bit out, his voice low. “You go ahead and have your fun, Wade. I’m finishing this myself.”
Wade chuckled, unfazed. “Oh, come on, don’t be like that, man. It’s just one night. Besides…” He shot Logan a knowing look. “I saw the way you looked at her. Maybe you should be thanking me. Gave you a chance to make a move.”
Logan didn’t respond, but Wade’s words hit uncomfortably close to the truth. He had been distracted. He’d let his focus slip, and now he was paying for it.
Without another word, Logan turned on his heel and stalked away, pushing through the crowd toward the exit. The night air hit him like a slap, cool and bracing, but it didn’t do much to ease the frustration roiling inside him. He’d let Wade derail the mission, let his own emotions cloud his judgment, and now the whole thing felt like a waste.
As he started down the street, his mind drifted back to her—the way she’d looked at him, the faint trace of hurt in her eyes before she’d walked away. He clenched his fists, a new determination hardening in his chest. He might have blown this mission tonight, but he wasn’t done. Not with the mission, and not with her.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
Logan had barely made it back to the apartment before exhaustion took hold, weighing down his limbs. He kicked off his boots and peeled off his shirt, letting it drop carelessly to the floor before sinking onto the bed. His mind was still tangled with thoughts of her—her quiet smile, the guarded look in her eyes, the way she’d walked away with her friend’s encouragement. He’d messed things up, and the night felt like one long series of missed chances.
He’d only been asleep for a couple of hours when a noise jolted him awake. At first, he thought it was part of some half-formed nightmare or maybe just the usual racket from one of the neighbors. But then he caught something familiar—her voice, muffled through the thin walls. He strained his hearing, every instinct snapping to attention. A glance at the grimy clock on his nightstand told him it was 1:29 a.m.
She must have just gotten home. But she wasn’t alone.
Logan sat up, his heartbeat quickening. He knew he should let it go, should just lie back down and ignore whatever was happening on the other side of the wall. But before he could think better of it, he slipped out of bed, padding across the creaky floorboards to the front door. He pressed his ear to the wall, barely breathing, his heightened senses picking up every word.
The guy’s voice was low and easy, with that too-smooth tone Logan had learned to distrust. He sounded friendly enough, but there was an edge of expectation, a subtle suggestion that grated against Logan’s nerves.
“So… tonight was fun,” the guy was saying, a hint of laughter in his voice. “Maybe we could do it again? Tomorrow, maybe?”
Logan could picture her expression without even seeing it—those walls going up, that faint, polite smile she used when she didn’t want to let someone in. He heard her let out a soft sigh.
“I’m… not really sure about tomorrow,” she replied, her voice guarded, cautious. “I have a lot going on.”
The guy chuckled, but there was a forced quality to it. “Come on, just a drink or something. You don’t have to play so hard to get, you know?”
Logan felt his jaw clench, his hands curling into fists at his sides. The guy was pushing, trying to wear down her resistance, and it grated on him like sandpaper. He didn’t like the way it sounded, didn’t like the edge in the guy’s voice like he thought he could charm his way past her boundaries. Logan’s instinct to protect her flared, raw, and almost territorial, even though he knew he had no right to feel that way.
There was a pause, and he could hear her shifting, probably stepping back, putting a little distance between them. “It’s not that,” she said, a little too politely. “I just… need some space, that’s all. Tonight was nice, but—”
“Space, huh?” the guy interrupted, his tone slipping from charming to something a little sharper. “You know, you don’t make it easy, do you?”
Logan could feel his pulse pounding in his ears, the urge to step outside and tell this guy to back off building with each word. But he held himself in check, forcing himself to stay silent, to let her handle it. She didn’t need him barging in like some kind of white knight, as much as he wanted to.
Another pause, and he heard her take a breath, steady but firm. “I appreciate tonight. Really. But I’m not looking for… anything serious.”
The guy let out a huff, barely masking his disappointment. “All right,” he said, though his tone made it clear he wasn’t happy about it. “Guess I’ll see you around, then.”
Logan listened, tense, as he heard the guy’s footsteps retreating down the hallway. Only when he heard the click of her door closing did he let out the breath he’d been holding. His fists unclenched, but the tension in his chest didn’t ease. He knew she’d handled it. She didn’t need him intervening. But the way the guy had pushed, the subtle pressure in his tone… made Logan’s blood simmer.
Before he could talk himself out of it, he slipped into the hallway, moving quietly until he reached her door. He hesitated, one hand raised, hovering just above the wood. Part of him knew he should just let it be, go back to his apartment, and leave her alone. But he couldn’t shake the worry gnawing at him, the urge to make sure she was really all right.
He knocked, softly at first, then a little louder when he didn’t hear anything.
A moment later, the door cracked open, and she peered out, eyes widening when she saw him. She looked tired, her makeup smudged, a faint crease of worry lingering between her brows. “Logan?” she said, sounding surprised, her voice soft and uncertain. “What are you…?”
He swallowed, his voice coming out rougher than he’d meant. “I just… wanted to make sure you’re okay. I heard him… y’know. Talking.”
She sighed, glancing back into her apartment for a moment before opening the door a little wider. “You were listening?” she asked, a faint hint of annoyance in her tone.
Logan shifted, rubbing the back of his neck. “Didn’t mean to eavesdrop. Just… wanted to make sure he didn’t give you any trouble.”
She looked at him, her expression softening, the guardedness melting away just a little. “It’s fine, Logan. Really. He was… nice, mostly. Just… maybe he wanted something I’m not ready to give.”
Logan nodded, relief mingling with an odd sense of satisfaction at her words. “Good. That he’s gone, I mean.” He hesitated, then added, quieter, “I just didn’t like the way he sounded. Like he thought he could… push you around.”
Her lips pressed into a faint smile, something close to gratitude in her eyes. “Thanks. But I can handle guys like that.” She let out a tired laugh. “I’ve been handling guys like that for a while now.”
He nodded, leaning against the doorframe, his gaze searching hers. “Yeah. I know you can.” He paused, then added, almost reluctantly, “But you don’t have to do it alone, y’know. If anyone bothers you… I’m right across the hall.”
She looked up at him, her eyes lingering on his face, and for a moment, he thought he saw a flicker of vulnerability there—a quiet gratitude she wasn’t quite ready to express. But then she shook her head, a faint smile tugging at her lips. “Thanks, Logan,” she murmured. “But… I don’t want you to feel like you have to keep an eye on me. I don’t want to be someone’s… responsibility.”
He shook his head. “It’s not that. I just… I care. That’s all.”
Her eyes softened, and she looked away, swallowing hard. “I don’t see why you care. Why you would…given…we barely know each other.” She paused, carefully considering her words. “But it’s been a long time since someone cared,” she admitted quietly, almost as if she hadn’t meant to say it out loud.
Logan could feel the weight of her words hanging in the air. He reached out, his hand hovering just above her shoulder, but he stopped himself, dropping his hand before it made contact.
“Well, you don’t have to worry about that anymore,” he said, his voice a soft murmur. “I’m here.”
She gave him a small, hesitant smile, a hint of hope breaking through the walls she kept so carefully in place. “Thank you, Logan.”
He nodded, stepping back to give her space, though he didn’t want to leave. “Get some rest,” he said, his voice gruff. “I’ll… see you tomorrow.”
She nodded, watching him as he turned to go, lingering in the doorway as if part of her didn’t want to close the door just yet. As he walked back to his apartment, he felt something shift in him—a quiet, steady resolve to be there, to be someone she could trust.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ
Logan was pacing back and forth in the small, dingy apartment, so agitated that even Wade seemed annoyed for once. Wade lounged on the couch, a magazine in one hand and a look of pure exasperation on his face as he watched Logan wearing a path into the floor.
“Why are you like this?” Wade finally snapped, tossing the magazine aside. “Did your parents not love you, or something? Because this level of brooding is painful to watch, even for me.”
Logan shot him a glare, but he didn’t have a comeback this time. His usual sarcasm was buried under a mess of thoughts he couldn’t quite untangle. He ran a hand through his hair, his voice coming out quieter, almost hesitant. “It’s just… she actually seemed like she wanted to talk to me last night. Like, really talk.”
Wade rolled his eyes, folding his arms behind his head. “God, I don’t see how I keep missing your late-night heart-to-hearts in the hallway,” he said with exaggerated interest. “Sounds like you’re one step away from serenading her or something.”
Logan’s eyes kept drifting to the door, that nagging worry gnawing at him. He hadn’t heard her leave her apartment all morning, and he couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling that something was wrong.
Finally, Wade sat up, giving him a pointed look. “Look, man, there’s only one way to stop acting like a lovesick teenager. Just go knock on her door. You’re driving me nuts over here.”
Logan hesitated, shifting his weight. Part of him hated the idea of just showing up unannounced, but he couldn’t shake the feeling of urgency. He needed to see her, to know she was okay. Before he could talk himself out of it, he gave Wade a grudging nod and headed for the door.
"Finally," Wade muttered behind him, smirking. "Go get her, tiger."
Logan ignored him, stepping into the dim hallway. He crossed the few steps to her apartment, his hand hovering just above the door. He took a breath, steadying himself, then knocked—softly at first, then louder when there was no response.
Silence.
He waited, his heartbeat picking up as seconds stretched into what felt like an eternity. He knocked again, pressing his ear to the door, straining to hear any movement inside. But there was nothing. No footsteps, no soft shuffle of her usual routine. An uneasy feeling crept over him. He hadn’t heard her leave that morning. Had he missed something? Was she—
Just then, he heard the familiar sound of footsteps echoing up the stairwell, and he turned, relief flooding him. But the relief was short-lived, quickly turning into confusion as he took in the scene.
She was coming up the stairs, but she wasn’t alone. Walking beside her was the guy from last night—the one her friend had set her up with. The guy was laughing, leaning a little too close to her, and Logan felt his jaw tighten instinctively. She had her arms crossed, her posture guarded but polite, and though she didn’t look particularly comfortable, she wasn’t pushing him away either.
Logan stood frozen, his hand still raised as if to knock, caught between relief and a prickling sense of jealousy. She looked up and noticed him, her eyes widening slightly in surprise.
“Logan,” she said, stopping on the landing. Her voice was a mix of surprise and something else he couldn’t quite place—maybe guilt, or hesitation.
The guy at her side glanced between them, raising an eyebrow. “Oh… hey,” he said, clearly picking up on the tension in the air. He smiled awkwardly, extending a hand. “I’m Jared. I, uh… guess you’re a neighbor?”
Logan didn’t take his hand, barely sparing him a glance. “Yeah,” he said, his voice low and rough. His eyes were fixed on her, searching her face, trying to read her expression.
She shifted uncomfortably, her arms still crossed tightly over her chest. “We… just ran into each other downstairs,” she explained, her gaze flicking between Logan and Jared. “He was just walking me up.”
Jared chuckled, clearly oblivious to the undercurrent in the air. “Yeah, thought I’d make sure she got back safe, y’know? This neighborhood’s not exactly the friendliest.”
Logan felt a surge of irritation, but he forced himself to stay calm, to keep his expression neutral. “She can handle herself,” he replied, the words coming out sharper than he intended. He saw her flinch and instantly regretted it, but he couldn’t help the tension coiling in his chest.
Jared blinked, clearly sensing he wasn’t welcome, and took a step back, raising his hands in a gesture of surrender. “All right, man. No need to get territorial,” he said with a forced laugh. “I’ll get out of your hair.” He turned to her, flashing a hopeful smile. “So… maybe we could catch up tomorrow? Grab a coffee or something?”
She hesitated, glancing briefly at Logan before nodding, though her smile looked a little forced. “Yeah, maybe. I’ll… let you know.”
Jared grinned, clearly taking that as a yes, and gave a little wave before heading back down the stairs. Logan watched him go, barely breathing until the sound of his footsteps faded completely. Only then did he turn to her, his expression softening as he searched her face.
“Did… you need something?” she asked, her gaze lingering on him, one eyebrow raised in quiet suspicion.
Logan cleared his throat, feeling his cheeks heat up slightly. This was ridiculous. He wasn’t sure what had possessed him to knock on her door, but now that he was here, his brain seemed to be working at half-speed.
“Uh, yeah,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck and forcing himself to meet her eyes. “I was wondering if you had… y’know… some eggs I could borrow.”
Her expression didn’t shift, but he saw the faintest flicker of amusement in her eyes. “Eggs?” she repeated like she was testing the word.
Logan felt himself growing more flustered. “Yeah. Eggs. They’re… good for protein,” he added lamely, the words sounding as awkward out loud as they felt in his head.
She watched him for a moment, clearly trying to decide if she believed him or not. A small, skeptical smile played at the corner of her lips like she could see right through his excuse but was willing to humor him.
“Sure. I think I’ve got some,” she said, stepping aside to let him in. “Come in while I go grab them from the kitchen.”
Logan hesitated, then nodded, slipping past her into the apartment. The warmth of her space hit him immediately, and he found himself surprised by how… homey it was. The faint scent of vanilla and something floral hung in the air, and soft lighting cast a cozy glow over everything. It was nothing like the dingy, bare-bones apartment he shared with Wade. Where his walls were chipped and peeling, hers were lined with neatly hung prints and framed photographs, small touches that gave the place a warmth he hadn’t expected.
As she disappeared into the kitchen, he let his gaze wander, taking in the shelves along one wall, filled with books. Dozens of them, all stacked neatly, some with worn covers and dog-eared pages, like they’d been read and re-read over the years. He noticed a mix of genres—mystery novels, classic literature, a few non-fiction titles, and even some poetry. It was the kind of collection that spoke to someone who spent a lot of time alone, lost in worlds beyond these walls.
He moved closer to one of the shelves, fingers ghosting over the spines without touching. A few books were stacked horizontally, others arranged by height. There was a kind of organized chaos to it, a personal touch that made him feel like he was seeing a side of her he hadn’t glimpsed before. He felt a strange pang of… something. Envy, maybe, or admiration. This was her space, her sanctuary, carefully built to be hers. And here he was, intruding on it.
“Didn’t peg you for a reader,” her voice came from behind him, light and teasing.
Logan turned, a bit flustered, caught off guard by her sudden reappearance. She held a carton of eggs in one hand, watching him with that same amused expression, like she knew he was lying about the whole “egg” thing but was willing to let it slide.
“I, uh…” He scratched the back of his head, feeling like he’d been caught red-handed. “Not really. Don’t have time for it.”
She shrugged, giving him a small smile as she set the egg carton on the counter. “Reading isn’t for everyone.”
He nodded, still taking in her apartment, feeling a strange comfort settle over him in the warmth of her space. “It’s… nice in here,” he admitted, his voice gruffer than he intended. “Didn’t expect it to feel so… I don’t know.”
She raised an eyebrow. “So what?”
“Homey, I guess,” he said, almost embarrassed to admit it. “My place… it’s nothing like this.”
A faint, sympathetic smile softened her face. “Well, your roommate doesn’t exactly scream ‘homey,’” she teased, glancing around as if imagining Wade sprawled across her carefully arranged furniture, disrupting the calm. “Not really surprised you don’t put much into decorating.”
Logan let out a low chuckle. “Yeah. Wade’s more… chaos than cozy.”
She laughed softly, a genuine, relaxed sound that made his chest feel unexpectedly warm. “I can’t even picture him reading a book.”
“Pretty sure he’d complain about the ‘small font’ and give up in five minutes,” Logan muttered, and she laughed again, a light, melodic sound that filled the space in a way that felt… right.
For a moment, they stood there in comfortable silence, the unspoken tension between them somehow lessened by the simple act of sharing a space. He glanced at the egg carton, feeling a little foolish now that he had no real reason to stay.
“Thanks for the eggs,” he mumbled, reaching for the carton but not quite moving to leave. “Didn’t need them, if I’m honest.”
She tilted her head, a knowing look in her eyes. “Yeah, I figured,” she said, her voice gentle but laced with amusement. “So… why did you come by?”
Logan hesitated, feeling a sudden vulnerability he wasn’t used to. “I guess… I just wanted to make sure you were okay. After last night, and then seeing you with that guy this morning…” He trailed off, running a hand over his face. “It just didn’t sit right with me.”
Her expression softened, and she looked down, fingers tracing absent patterns on the counter. “Jared,” she said as if the name left a sour taste. “Monica’s idea. She thinks I need to ‘put myself out there.’” She rolled her eyes, a faint bitterness creeping into her tone. “It’s not really my thing, but… I figured I’d try.”
Logan studied her, catching the flicker of doubt in her eyes. “You didn’t seem too thrilled with him,” he observed, trying to keep his tone casual.
She shrugged, her smile a little sad. “He’s… nice. I just don’t know if ‘nice’ is enough.” She glanced up, meeting his gaze, her eyes holding his for a moment longer than necessary. “I guess I’ve got my own walls. Maybe it’s easier to push people away than to… let them in.”
Logan felt his chest tighten, recognizing himself in her words. “Yeah. I know how that goes,” he murmured, his voice low. “People tend to… make assumptions, think they know you just because of how you look or act. Sometimes it’s easier to let them believe what they want.”
She nodded, her gaze dropping again, her fingers still tracing absent shapes on the counter. “And what do people assume about you?” she asked, almost too softly.
He swallowed, feeling a familiar pang of vulnerability that he usually kept buried. “They see… this,” he said, gesturing to himself, to the rough exterior, the scars that lined his knuckles, the tension that seemed to live in his shoulders. “And they think I’m nothing but that. Just… rough edges. An animal.”
She looked up, her gaze soft and understanding, and he felt that ache again, the need to be seen, really seen. “You’re not just that,” she said quietly, her words barely more than a whisper. “I can see that you're more than that…now.”
A warmth lingered between them, subtle but undeniable. Logan could feel it settling over him, grounding him in a way he hadn’t expected. Standing here, in her space, surrounded by traces of her life, he felt an unfamiliar sense of belonging—like, for once, he wasn’t just some outsider passing through.
She let out a small sigh, her gaze dropping to the floor. “Anyway,” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper, almost shy. “Thanks for checking on me.”
He nodded, swallowing back the impulse to reach out, to close the last inch of space between them. “Yeah. Anytime,” he said, his voice softer than he intended.
She led him to the door, holding it open as he stepped into the dim hallway. Logan hesitated, lingering just outside her apartment, feeling a strange reluctance to leave. The words were out of his mouth before he could second-guess himself.
“Would you… maybe want to come over?” He forced a small, awkward smile. “I’m sure Wade would love the company.”
She looked up at him, her expression caught between surprise and something softer. A small smile touched her lips, but she shook her head, a hint of apology in her eyes. “I would, but… being around people sort of… drains me.”
He watched her, sensing there was more she wasn’t saying, something fragile behind the simple explanation.
She hesitated, her fingers gripping the edge of the door, her gaze flickering up to meet his. “Not you, though,” she added softly, almost as if the words had slipped out without her permission. Her cheeks flushed, and she looked away quickly. “Just… people in general. Introvert thing, I guess.”
Logan felt a flicker of something warm and unfamiliar in his chest. She hadn’t meant to single him out, but the admission hung in the air between them, as delicate and unsteady as a breath. “Yeah,” he said, his voice rougher than he intended. “No problem.”
She looked back up at him, a softness in her eyes that made him feel like maybe, just maybe, she was beginning to let him in. It wasn’t much—not yet—but it was enough to make his pulse quicken, to make him feel like he’d taken a step closer to something he’d been chasing without even knowing it.
“See you, Logan,” she whispered, her voice lingering in the quiet air, her eyes holding his for just a beat longer than necessary.
“See you,” he replied, his voice equally soft, reluctant. He took a step back, the warmth of her presence already beginning to fade, and gave her a small nod before turning away.
As he walked down the hallway, he couldn’t shake the feeling that something had changed between them—a door, barely ajar, but ajar nonetheless.
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pftones3482 · 19 days ago
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The Good
All right - I've had time to collect my thoughts on the new season. I'm going to split them into two posts: The Good and the Not So Good/Bad, just because I know some people don't want to focus on the negatives for shows.
If you want to read my "Not So Good/Bad" opinions, you can read this post.
But for the things I loved about this season, in no particular order, click the "Keep Reading!" Under a cut for spoilers, obviously (and featuring some screenshots)
The voice acting was impeccable. Every single person who came back for their role did an amazing job (but we knew that would be the case)
I was so SO happy they kept in their trend of putting things over the end credits - I was really worried they wouldn't continue that because it's not really a thing anymore, since people don't tend to watch end credit scenes on streaming platforms
Literally everything Stacy and Perry related. I expected "Agent T for Teen" would be my favorite episode, but it was so fun and silly and I'm so happy with how it ended up overall. I loved the Stacy lore drop, and I am SO BEYOND PLEASED that they made them friends. I genuinely think I would have hated this season if they hadn't made the Teal Duo besties
I really enjoyed the amount of Buford content?? It felt like he played a more prominent role in this season
Same thing as above but with Linda - I'm glad they didn't just give her the whole "I want to spend time with my family" spiel in the first episode and then ignore it. She's clearly trying to spend more time with her kids.
Finally acknowledging that Carl definitely has another job(s), and letting him lay into Monogram. I do think there's more to be said for that situation, but I'm glad we got something
The animation overall! There were some parts that felt a little off to me, but for the most part I enjoyed that they kept the character designs the same and stuck with the simple charm of the show
The Haberdasher. Full stop, I want him to come back. I love that he's a spoof on the Mad Hatter, his energy was fun
The episode "License to Bust" is now up there in one of the most solid episodes of all time. It hit all the right notes in a satisfying way. (Also also did anyone else notice the instructor smile after Candace told him to buckle up? It took me four tries to get a screen shot it was so fast lol)
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(he's smiling I swear, go back and look at his face for the rest of the driving test)
Ferb food critic was COMICAL (and again with the spoofing of Disney characters, there was a lot of that in this season!)
"Apparently his mother didn't teach him........well, a lot of things. WHICH is why we all have a job!" - I laughed for a solid minute after that line
On that note: "And I thought you were crazy for putting tank treads on a Whack-a-Pest!"
The kids all supporting Candace this season was really cute (she literally didn't make the 'sand castle' but they still cheered for her lol)
"He has a hard out at noon" and then Perry going home and smiling contently while Candace gives him a bath, please they're so cute
Continuing the trend of lines I liked, "I forgot Agent W was missing" in regards to the agents getting de-wormed fucking KILLED me (and was a great callback to earlier in the season when Doof was like "Maybe he has worms!" in the vet episode)
Setting Candace up to be a lawyer in the future
Carl and Brittany's beef (I love Brittany I've only had her for 27 seconds but I want to keep her)
Every single scene with Lawrence, actually. Love that silly man
I genuinely really loved "The Aurora Perry-alis." I've seen some conflicting thoughts on it from folks, but I think it was a nice way to reintroduce Montnessa, it let them tell the audience "hey, we didn't forget about Stacy and Perry," and the animation was really pretty. It also felt like it could fit nicely into Season 3 or 4, which was kind of how I was judging the episodes individually.
My Overall Favs:
Agent T for Teen, The Aurora Perry-alis, and License to Bust
And finally, also in no order, some of my favorite screenshots I took (minus the ones with Stacy and Perry together bc I already posted those and Tumblr has it's limits lol)
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Anyway, if you want to know my thoughts on anything specific, you're more than welcome to shoot me an ask!
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thebroccolination · 3 months ago
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Soooo when I said, “There’ll likely be a loud minority openly complaining about Krist topping and Singto bottoming and much more silent disapproval,” in my last post, I was giving the fandom way too much credit.
According to friends on Twitter, there was indeed a significant backlash over the sex scenes portrayed in the novel, some fans even going so far as to @ the series’ official account to complain about it.
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(Don’t want PhiTam, yet tagging Krist first. Mixed signals, fam.)
Multiple folks say the mood among the fandom on Twitter at large right now seems to be mainly denial, that because the novel and series are written by different people, Singto’s character will surely play the top role in the series—even though he’s the bottom in the novel.
But, y’know:
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And I, uh. I mean. This is:
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Y’all?
Even outside the series, they’ve been—
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Yeah, that.
So like. Y’know.
I mean, listen. To be so viscerally clear here, the reason I’m excited about Krist playing the top is because he played the bottom in both of his previous BL roles. (KristSingto had two shorts for Baby Bright where Krist seems more top-leaning, but I guess it was vague enough for people to ignore if they didn’t want to see it.) So I’m glad he’s getting versatility as an actor.
But it’s also because he’s been mistreated in the past by many KristSingto fans who, since they perceive him to be “the bottom” or “the wife,” seem to think this means he’s got to be docile and submissive and sweet, even when he’s pushed too far. To be honest, I had the realization recently that maybe the reason so many Peraya chose to ignore interfans calling Krist homophobic for so many years could be that they didn’t care either way. As one of the OG fandoms, it seems that their fans skew older and more conservative, so it could be as simple as that. They knew he wasn’t homophobic, everyone did, but real life queer issues didn’t matter to them, so they didn’t care that interfans were absolutely decimating his reputation among the queer community when it was OG Peraya stalking him and harassing him that made him post that story in the first place.
I mean, not to invalidate the high emotions going on over on Twitter dot com, but I can’t believe this upset over Singto’s character bottoming for Krist’s character wasn’t limited to a few silly temper tantrums from fringe fans with outdated beliefs about queer people.
Honestly, that there’s anger over this at all says plenty about how they must perceive the bottom role. Being on top is hot, but being on bottom is shameful? (What is this, Ancient Rome?)
I hope y’all know I try as much as I can to avoid making posts about fandom negativity and toxicity. I think emphasizing the positive aspects is more helpful in the long run. But many in KristSingto’s fandom continually treat both of them like products, and I am truly tired of it. Many whitewash Singto, many belittle Krist, and they need to fix their attitudes.
Personally, I consider myself part of all three of the KristSingto fandoms: Yuyu (Krist), Peraya (KristSingto), and Samoonjaopa (Singto). So when I criticize any of them, I’m not trying to burn the house down. I’m saying, “Stop playing with matches in the house.”
Many Peraya boycotted “Be My Favorite” which, like, whatever, watch what you like. But many among that many also openly complained about it while it was airing. Some went so far as to bully Gawin, using alt accounts to call him a halfbreed and a leech. When I called out this behavior, I was accused by multiple Peraya of trying to make the fandom look bad, that those alt accounts were clearly run by other fans trying to do the same. When the focus, as far as I’m concerned, should have been on protecting and supporting Gawin. There were very few Peraya who showed support for Krist’s friendship with Gawin continuing publicly, and their quiet likes and endorsements of tweets criticizing Krist did far more damage to their reputation than me standing up for Gawin ever did.
While I’m doing this, lemme just address the fandom ridiculousness that’s been going on across the board over the past year, shall I?
Some Samoonjaopa complained about Singto’s lack of solo work last year compared to Krist’s and went so far as to @ Krist to tell him that he wasn’t doing enough to keep Singto steadily employed. Which? Isn’t Krist’s job??? And ignores the possibility that Singto can get his own work, is a seasoned talent at GMMTV in his own right, and maybe just wanted to relax last year since the man is a dedicated introvert who’s openly and repeatedly said he’s prioritizing his mental health more these days? And again: there are many in Singto’s fandom who are continually, constantly whitewashing his photos. Stop whitewashing Singto. You’re his fanbase. The people who are supposed to love him most for who he is, not the fictional person you’re photoshopping him into for your aesthetic preferences. How do you think he’s felt for the past decade seeing not only the media whiten his skin but his own fans? Portray his melanin or stop posting photos of him at all. If you can’t see how beautiful he is tan, you don’t deserve to call yourself Samoonjaopa.
Meanwhile, some Yuyus have continually moaned about Singto’s return, complaining about Krist’s lack of music projects even though Krist himself said he’ll be focusing on that after “The Ex-Morning” airs. He’s already been hospitalized this year? Stop pressuring him to film a series, host, take care of his family, and work on an album? They’ve also accused Singto of coming back to GMMTV because he ran out of money, that his freelance career was bombing, etc. Calling him desperate and a leech. (People really like to accuse people close to Krist as a leech, what is that.) What’s worse is that some of them don’t even dislike Singto—they just want to piss off the Peraya. But hasn’t Krist made it devastatingly clear that he adores Singto? Was it not enough when he had to call out one of his own solo fans for trash-talking Singto last year when he was already getting backlash for his friendship with Gawin?
Fans in all three fandoms need to reevaluate why they’re even here.
This applies to all fans in all fandoms everywhere: if you spend most of your time in fandom fighting and policing people and spreading anger and toxicity rather than lifting up the real people you’re ostensibly here to support, then you’re doing this wrong.
Love brought you here. Act like it.
I left Twitter because the situation there was too toxic to stand, even to stay for KristSingto and BounPrem, and while I haven’t been there for months, I did predict that some Peraya would be upset about a possible dynamic switch. I just overestimated their maturity about it, clearly.
I probably should have said all of this while I was on Twitter, but people have to realize it on their own or it won’t stick.
So what I’m going to do instead is go on promoting KristSingto to fans who haven’t had the chance to get to know them yet, because I love Krist and I love Singto, and I think they deserve more fans, new fans who don’t treat them like property.
Obligatory final note that of course this isn’t the entire fandom behaving badly. If you’ll notice, I used qualifiers in this entire post. Some, many, etc. There are many lovely people in all three fandoms, but the ones ruining everything are loud and need to be addressed for things to improve. Ignoring them hasn’t helped so far. I say this because sometimes people get very upset and don’t utilize close reading skills.
All this over top/bottom dynamic switch.
Told y’all it was brave of KristSingto to do it.
Now to hope no one bothers KristSingto about it at the book fair tomorrow. 👁️👁️
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safety-pin-punk · 1 year ago
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Punk History Resources: Vol 2
This is a compilation of resources found and recommended by various alternative bloggers, each of whom are credited for their contributions. This started because I was getting SO MANY asks about resources such as videos, books, and websites to use to learn about punk history. Admittedly, my own list wasn't that long, so I thought it was best to reach out to some others and share their knowledge with everyone. Now, I'm hoping to make this an annual occurrence, where we all share our knowledge with each other. So thank you again to everyone who helped out with this!!
Link to Volume 1
@whatamibutabutteredcroissant @unfriendlybat @ghost--in-a-machine @mushroomjar
YOUTUBE:
Part 1 of The Decline of Western Civilization (It recieved mixed reception from people in the scene) (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
Part 3 of The Decline of Western Civilization (Focuses on the gutter-punks of 90s LA) (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
BOOKS:
Some Wear Leather Some Wear Lace by Andi Harriman and Marloes Bontje (It's mostly goth/horror rock/post punk/deathrock but I feel like it's adjacent enough for it to merit a read) (unfriendlybat)
Spray Paint the Walls: The Story of Black Flag by Stevie Chick (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
Kids of the Black Hole: Punk Rock in Postsuburban California by Dewar Macleod (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
We Got the Neutron Bomb: The Untold Story of L.A. Punk by Marc Spitz and Brendan Mullen (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
Left of The Dial: Conversations with Punk Icons by David Ensminger (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
The Art of Darkness: The History of Goth by John Robb (A comprehensive history of Goth) (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
Punk Zines by Eddie Piller and Steve Rowland (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
The High Desert by James Spooner ( A graphic novel memoir of how the authro came into the scene) (ghost--in-a-machine)
Let Fury Have The Hour by Antonio D'Ambrosio (About the band The Clash) (anonymous submission)
MOVIES / DOCUMENTARIES:
Masque (A 10 minute doc about the Masque club in LA) (whatamibutabutteredcroissant)
ARTICLES:
History of Anarcho-Punk and Peace Punk (mushroomjar)
Late 80s and Early 90s Puerto Rico Hardcore Punk (mushroomjar)
The Jewish History of Punk (mushroomjar)
Japan's Impact on Punk Culture (mushroomjar)
The Forgotten Story of Pure Hell, America's First Black Punk Band (mushroomjar)
The Black Punk Pioneers Who Made Music History (mushroomjar)
Why Poly Styrene is Punk's Great Lost Icon (mushroomjar)
Alternative to Alternatives: The Black Grrrls Riot Ignored (mushroomjar)
Abandoning The Ear? Punk and Deaf Convergences Part II (mushroomjar)
Race, Anarchy, and Punk Rock: The Impact of Cultural Boundaries Within The Anarchist Movement (mushroomjar)
Street Medic Handbook (safety-pin-punk)
ZINES:
Sticking To It (safety-pin-punk)
So You Say You Want An Insurrection (safety-pin-punk)
All Power To The People (safety-pin-punk)
How to Survive a Felony Trial: Keeping Your Head up through the Worst of It (safety-pin-punk)
Collectives: Anarchy Against The Mass (safety-pin-punk)
Social War on Stolen Native Land: Anarchist Contributions (safety-pin-punk)
A Civilian's Guide to Direct Action (safety-pin-punk)
Critical Thinking as Anarchist Weapon (safety-pin-punk)
Security Culture: A Handbook for Activists (safety-pin-punk)
Betrayal: A Critical Analysis of Rape Culture in Anarchist Subcultures (safety-pin-punk)
ETC:
The Anarcho-Stencilism Subreddit (people upload stencils for others to use for free) (mushroomjar)
I would love to make a Vol. 3 post next year, so if you have resources and want to share, PLEASE message me!! (Preferably DMs)
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lavender-twilight23 · 25 days ago
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THUNDERBOLTS* ESSAY POST ANALYSIS THING BC I HAVE TO SHARE MY HYPERFIXATED FANDOM THOUGHTS
I’ve had this in my head for a while, but I really want to share it because I haven’t heard anybody else mention it before.
It’s about Bob because who else would it be about, everything is about him in my head nowadays 😅
Spoilers!
ANYWAYS I love digging deep into fandom details or pieces of dialogue that hint to deeper things, and I wanna talk about THIS LINE from the post-credits scene:
“…I can’t be the Sentry without the other side.”
It’s a simple line and all, it’s also pretty exposition-y I guess, which doesn’t bother me, because it’s Bob, and it’s a piece of info that is probably gonna be important heading into Avengers: Doomsday.
But then I realized the implications of that line.
At the end of Thunderbolts*, Bob had absolutely no memory of anything that had happened. Not the Sentry, not the Void, not his superpowers, not any of it. So for him to say that in the post-credits scene and DIRECTLY MENTION the Sentry AND indirectly the Void as well means that at some point within those 14 months, Bob would’ve had to 1) remember what had happened, 2) remember that he has superpowers in the first place 3) realize that the New York incident with the Void was caused by him, and 4) in order to know that he can’t be the Sentry without the Void, he would’ve had to TRY to be the Sentry and then the Void would’ve had to come out, probably resulting in some sort of dangerous situation which made it so Bob was too scared to try again.
And the reason why I say that last part is because even after 14 months of time in which Bob probably worked on himself a lot and formed a good life with the team, he still seems incredibly cautious and nervous about the topic of the Void. He refers to the Sentry by name, but NOT the Void. When he says “the other side,” he slows down and says it nervously, like he’s scared to actually say the words ‘the Void.’ It’s like he’s treating it like a ‘he-who-must-not-be-named’ thing.
I’ve heard that some people are nervous that Marvel might ‘brush off’ Bob’s mental health issues in the future of the MCU, similar to how Tony’s anxiety was dealt with: Meaning that Tony’s anxiety was a main struggle for him in Iron Man 3, but then after he overcame that bad stretch, it wasn’t really tackled or faced in that scale or brought up in detail again.
To be honest, I don’t think Marvel is gonna do that, and it’s because of that ONE line from Bob. If they were going to brush off his mental health issues in the future of the MCU, why not have him just refer to both the Sentry and the Void by name with ease? And/or why not have him be comfortable or familiar with his powers/different sides of himself?
No, not only does Bob seem incredibly uncomfortable when the topic is brought up, he can’t even SAY ‘the Void,’ by name. And the simple fact that he can’t be the Sentry without the Void implies that– regardless of any experimenting/training that he’s done over the 14 months– he doesn’t have full control over his powers and is pretty unsure around his own superpowered strength. AND after Bob says the line, instead of elaborating or trying to defend himself a bit more, he immediately changes the topic and says he did the dishes. All of that screams his discomfort and apprehension regarding the topic of his powers and the Void, which shows me that he still not only has a lot of growing-into-his-powers to do, but he still has a LONG way to go with being comfortable with his powers and being okay with his mental illness.
And not for nothing, but his powers are DIRECTLY TIED to his mental illness. So if Marvel was going to ‘brush off’ his mental illness or not tackle it again, they would have to ignore the very NATURE of the Sentry and the Void. The Void is pretty much the physical manifestation of Bob’s depression. I don’t think Marvel would be able to ‘brush off’ his mental illness, and then simultaneously have the Void exist.
Anyways, there’s my disorganized yet incredibly specific Thunderbolts* ramble, enjoy :P
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wesleysniperking · 9 months ago
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Usopp, Representation, and the Black Experience: My Perspective (maybe TL;DR)
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Disclaimer: This post reflects my personal interpretation and connection with Usopp's character. I understand that not everyone may share the same perspective, and that's okay. This is just my own take based on my experiences and thoughts about identity and representation.
When it comes to Black characters, I’ve noticed a recurring theme where they often distance themselves from their non-Black friends or take time away due to personal struggles. It’s a reflection of the weight they carry, and sometimes there’s even some regret for doing so. I can think of plenty of shows that have touched on this, and honestly, I get it. A lot of Black people, myself included, feel the need to face things alone, likely because of deep-rooted issues tied to our history, upbringing, and the challenges of navigating predominantly non-Black spaces—especially when tokenism is involved.
I’ve been that person, and in many ways, I still am. My sister and mom often joke that Usopp feels like a Black guy with a lot of “white” friends. They also mention how Black men, especially those in subcultures like the hipster scene, often juggle two social circles. My cousin, a big One Piece fan, is the perfect example of this. Even Jacob Gibson, who plays Usopp in the live-action series, gives off a similar vibe.
I know this might come off as blunt or even as a generalization, but to me, Usopp reflects a part of the Black experience. He’s like the Lando (or Finn) in Star Wars, Link Hayes in The Mod Squad, Noah in Young Riders, and Marcellus in The Originals. He’s the Renee in Ally McBeal, Tucker in Danny Phantom, Black Panther in Avengers, Cyborg in Teen Titans, Gerald in Hey Arnold, James Rhodes in Iron Man, Chris Washington in Get Out, Ben in Night of the Living Dead, and Christopher in Scrubs. He’s that Black guy.
Maybe One Piece could show Usopp as more than just his race, but it’s hard to ignore the connection. And that’s okay. It’s something I’ve been reflecting on for a while, and I wanted to share it.
GIF credit
Usopp fan club (feel free to join)
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lucca-stateofmind · 2 months ago
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Bob is bipolar (Thunderbolts) - rambling ahead
Marvel's new movie 'Thunderbolts' spoilers about the plot, its end and Bob's character. I'd also like to warn anyone reading this that I am no professional and only an undiagnosed teenager hardcore fan of psychology. Seems to me that we also need a mental health issue trigger warning, please seek help anywhere you can if you feel anything that isn't supposed to be. You all deserve the best and I love you <3
Let's start with the beginning. Bipolarity is a mental health condition that causes mood swings between two moods : a manic phase in which life is amazing and a depressive episode in which life is eating you alive (please note that I am simplying it for the people that don't know what it is, there are more useful ressources online). To me, Bob is bipolar even though it isn't explicitely said in the movie. One of the first clue is the way he describes it himself to Yelena, I don't have the exact same words but he tells her he sometimes feels happy but then he feels sad and forgets what happens once he's happy again, here hinting at the different mood swings. His childhood traumas could've caused the creation of the disorder and the consumption of drugs worsened it to the point of partial amnesia. The fact that he didn't receive psychological help didn't help him understand what was 'wrong' with him or how to ignore his self depracation worded by Void (anti-Sentry) in the final battle. Another clue is the second post-credit scene when it is revealed he cannot use his powers as Sentry when he is not in what we know is a depressive episode. If in the comics it is said he has schizophrenia, that the Sentry he beats up in the end is Void -his alter ego- and that the incoherent mumbling are going to this representation, not a schizophrenic disorder mentions such mood swings. He may have both but we haven't really uncovered this part; we also have to remember that Marvel doesn't take the full characters' backstories and only adapts them for the narrative they want to tell).
I hope we'll see more of it and that those anti-liberals won't open their mouth about how 'woke' it is to have mental disorders on screen - it will disturb their children, remember!
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bad-holmes-impression · 2 months ago
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would sell one-third of my soul for season 1 of tts but for 14+.
-diving into rapunzel’s guilt over touching the rocks as she tries to do that typical “filler” stuff, so the audience isn’t wondering why the problem isn’t being addressed, but rather, wondering how much longer until she breaks and addresses it.
-more character focus (honestly, i want this for the whole show). cassandra had some good development in season 1, but i’d love it if it delved into eugene struggling to reconcile his past with the fact that he lives in a castle now. with. you know. the guy that almost had him hanged.
-more eugene and lance flashbacks, particularly lance-focused stuff.
-more time with varian (particularly the varian-rapunzel and varian-eugene dynamics). really integrating him into the faces we think of when we think of the main cast, even if he isn’t necessarily their friend. or, heck, actually making him their friend.
-the destruction of old corona in real time. maybe making it the image shown during the credits! like, we see the normal village, and then, with each passing episode, the rocks overtake it further, pushing themselves into the picture as the sky gradually darkens.
-a varian pov episode with the masked men outside his house as he battles lingering sickness from the storm. we can even combine this with “the quest for varian” as rapunzel investigates his abandoned, cobweb-covered lab.
-would. would it be too ridiculously angsty of me to ask for varian to inject ruddiger with the growth serum onscreen. because i kind of want that.
-blood during the finale. be it cass’, the rocks causing eugene an injury, or a spike plunging through the automaton and across the side of varian’s face, leaving a scar that lasts forever and the very obvious symbolism going hand-in-hand with it.
HONESTLY THIS GOES FOR S2 AS WELL.
-cass actually struggling with her rotted hand.
-rapunzel making excuses to herself that no, she’s not just ignoring her problems all over again, because she’s traveling! she’s figuring out how to stop the black rocks! it’s fine!
-treating lance being poisoned with way more depth, because. like. that shouldn’t be made into a funny scene. we can let lance not be the comedic black best friend once. i’m begging you.
-flashbacks to corona and varian’s prison breakout, along with his internal redemption and andrew manipulating him.
-cass’ transformation into moon cass visibly making her look more gaunt, like how the flower healed gothel but in reverse. also having her be possessed by zhan tiri, at least for part of her arc.
okay fine we’re going into season three because this post is spiraling out of control
-letting varian sacrifice himself for corona, except there’s obviously some magic thing that still saves him. but that really should have been his redemption moment. the climax. *”there was room for two on that door, rose” voice* there was room for two inside that hair shield, rapunzel!
-either making quirin actually dead or at least doing some kind of fakeout.
-king edmund showing more signs of mental illness.
-multiple episodes where lance is at least featured with angry & cat. slowly but surely maturing enough to adopt them.
-varian’s voice getting more strained in “nothing left to lose” after being hit with the rocks. (jeremy jordan is an insane-level performer— i know he could’ve sold that so well and i’m baffled why they didn’t tell him to.)
-zhan tiri being much, much creepier.
-cass deteriorating more physically than just being pale, causing people to naturally show sympathy for her instead of. you know. a sadistic grin as she wields a sword effortlessly.
-the moonstone not healing cass’ disability.
-varian either getting to freak out inside that rock cage, or us seeing him consciously force his panic down. he’s still human even though he’s a genius, and he was confined hundreds of feet above the ground for about a day.
-not recreating the new dream moments in the finale, but giving us some original cass stuff that means just as much. this also comes with seeing what killed cass.
-making it clear that varian chose the role of royal engineer. also that he got to bring hot running water to his village first, the way he wanted to.
-depending on how cass’ arc is handled, either letting her be captain of the guard or exiling her with a hint that she’ll return to rapunzel in secret.
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thecourtoflionsandwolves · 11 days ago
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I received this question, but the person didn't want it to be publicly posted to avoid also getting trolls on their inbox and I don't blame them. But I still want to answer it so I'm doing by reposting it and preserving their privacy.
Message: "I'm sorry but I'm not sure how Sam is the co-lead in s2. If you are a casual fan, you don't get that. You'd think the lead is Jacob and co-lead Delainey (she is a woman so different category? Assad is next). Sam? Is barely there. You have to know Lestat's role in the books to think that he will come back and have a role different than what was already shown. Maybe there is something I'm missing here, but shouldn't "co-leads" be what makes sense in the current plot/season and not what may come in the future?"
Exactly. First of all, there are different types of shows. You have a show with only one main actor where everyone else is a guest or recurring actor at best, but never part of the regular cast, so it's basically just one person doing all the press, posters, being submitted to awards etc (example: The Mandalorian). Something similar with two co-leads, like Supernatural. Everything else works just the same, but the difference is that it is two people instead of just one. An ensemble show with an hierarchy, where some will be leading and others will be supporting characters, but they're all part of the main cast, featured on almost all episodes, individual and group interviews, they show up on posters (the leads will be bigger and on the front center while the supporting characters will be smaller and on the back/side), supporting characters still get big arcs even if they have a shorter screen time than the protagonist(s), like, for example, Stranger Thing. An ensemble show without hierarchy, where there isn't a clear protagonist, the credits are just a formality, everyone has the same relevance, the posters, promo etc are basically equal, there might be some rotation (like episode 1 is centered on character A, episode 2 on B and on) for logistic reasons and to be able to accomodate everyone, but if you compare everything at the end, it's still pretty balanced, like Pose.
Interview With the Vampire is an ENSEMBLE SHOW. I'm still not sure if it is supposed to have an hierarchy, but it's not a show just about Lestat and/or Louis. Claudia has relevance. Armand has relevance. Daniel has relevance. Gabrielle, Maharet, Mekare, Merrick, Marius and David will have relevance if/when they show up. There are situations where one person is kept out of things for plot reasons (when they hid Assad on season 1, it did make sense because then Armand was a secret, but it doesn't make sense now), logistics or personal reason, like a main actor not giving interviews because they just had a baby or something, but otherwise always being included in the press tour. There isn't anything stopping them from using Jacob, Delainey and Eric (and they're doing it now, proving that all the focus on Sam was a choice and bullshit) and Assad (that they're still ignoring).
It's hard to know exactly what they will do with IWTV because it's still a work-in-progress, they're still going season by season, it isn't set in stone which books and how much of their plots they're using, but even if they want Louis and Lestat to be the leads, there might be situations where someone else appears more, like Armand on season 2 having more screen time than Lestat, and I'm assuming also more than Louis on season 3 since Armand is a big part of the second book. And unless something changes, Rolin did say something about having a plan for Armand for multiple seasons. Sam might be a co-lead (still debatable to me, but I let anons have it for a moment because I'm avoiding fights and that's still a high possibility anyway), but even if Assad isn't bigger or as big as him, he's still important and should be treated as such. But they aren't doing that with him. Heck, they weren't even doing that with Jacob that has the best scenes, screen time, is on every poster etc. They treated it like the Lestat show for one or two entire month(s). And that's not only utterly bullshit, but it's something that I've NEVER SEEN BEFORE. I've been watching television for decades and I've never seen them only constantly using only one person to promote an ensemble show, let alone one that appeared so little on the season.
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