#alien husband at this point

[thecandywrites]

Kinktober Day 17- Cum Play

Yeah. Had to go Jika again. Because Jika cum is literally iredescent holographic jelly highlighter as far as looks and consistancy.

A billion thanks to @starsandskies for her kinktober prompts. You're awesome and amazing.

Enjoy.

Kinktober Day 17- Cum play. 

There was something innately special about jika cum. It looked like a holographic highlighter jelly. It tasted slightly minty. And because of the properties of the fluid that surrounded each sperm cell, that in itself looked like a little speck of glitter, meant it had certain “effects” on human skin. 

Most noteworthy that had been experienced so far- it could be used like sunscreen and treat sunburn and even heal scars and even was moisturizing and helped keep any fine lines and wrinkles at bay and keep the appearance of celulite at bay as well. 

However, it also could be used simply for cosmetic purposes like an actual holographic highlighter. And it could be used as a paint too, which depending on what color of paper or what kind of paper or canvas was used as well as how thick or thinly it was applied, meant a huge array of colors could be achieved and it was better than any dual chrome eyeshadow or highlighter. 

So here Kiara sat in her art studio, using her Isthantari’s own cum to paint it onto her latest masterpiece, featuring the cum as her medium. But the source of such amazing effects had to be kept rather secret. 

Especially since in Jika hierarchy, only a queen Jika would ever receive a male consort’s cum and would use it to fertilize her near limitless supply of eggs. 

However, because of an engineered redundancy, most queens had three to five times the consorts to choose from to be their royal consorts and really only needed between a dozen to two dozen of them, meaning that the royal batches for the princess' consorts numbered in the hundreds as far as her prospects to choose from. And the remaining ones, were simply assigned to serve the hive in other ways, and were given luxurious accommodations because they were royal consorts after all. Which was indicated by the purple sheen to the black of the black and yellow that colored their exoskeleton. However, because they were royal consorts, meant that they were not slaves to the hive mind. Instead, the queen controlled it entirely and they simply answered to her via the hivemind when she would use the hivemind like a computer to simply get updates in the various aspects of business, the hive’s health and food supply and work, etc.

But royal consorts were literally bred to serve a queen, and treat her like a goddess. To feed her, care for her, surround her in comfort via their own jika silk and breed her as she so desired. And because of the incubation time, meant that their own brains were just as intelligent and advanced as their queen’s was. 

However for every advantage, there was a disadvantage. To be a chosen consort- meant that that consort’s brain atrophed until all they knew was their own name, and how their queen who had chosen them- liked and wanted and could still have the ability to provide that to her in exchange for breeding rights to the queen. And when a queen either died, or was taken over by another, they were usually killed off with their queen. 

Which is why most of the consorts who knew the risks of that- if they felt the queen was weak and likely to be overthrown could simply choose not to induce any more intimacy or try to court her harder than their batchmates, not only to keep their intelligent mind intact, but if and when that queen could be overthrown, they were not in danger of being killed off. They would simply answer to whichever queen took her place and carry on with business as usual.

But the danger that most unchosen consorts now faced when they were stationed on Earth- is that the way the queen ruled the hive and her consorts and to the degree- the hive mind- was through her own pheromones. 

And Earth’s inhabitants also had pheromones and while most people on Earth didn’t think anything about their own pheromones, other than simply applying deodorant to keep body odor under control, is that non chosen consorts were just as susceptible to the pheromones of the peoples of Earth because of how shockingly similar it was to thier own pheramones. And they had a penchant for larger women. Because in Jika society and culture, the larger the queen, the better the hive and the more children she can birth and the more successful the hive can be and also was a sign that her consorts fed and cared for her exceedingly well to the point that she could get so large, she could no longer move under her own power and had to have her consorts create a nest of their silk around her and use that nest to carry her around once she got to be that big herself. 

And the queen- for being so powerful, was surprisingly delicate, her own exoskeleton was much softer and stretchier to accommodate her ever growing size and was similar to a laundry pod in texture.

But in Jika culture, it was downright dangerous for any other being to pose a threat, even an unwitting and uncontrollable one to a queen. Who had an entire hive at her disposal to kill any and all threats to her rulership over the hive. Even when that “threat” was a being who was incapable of replacing a queen and doing anything with the hive, much less the hive mind itself.

However, there was a silver lining.

In Jika society, the last batch of a successful queen who got to hand down her hive to a daughter and her own batch of consorts, both chosen and unchosen, got to go home to the homeworld. And the last batch was incubated in the queen herself. And once they hatched from that abdomen, it’s now deflated and unusable state could be cut off and the queen could now move of her own accord and hand rear and train her last batch herself along with her chosen consorts. These were considered super batches. Which produced Super Queens and Super Consorts. They were the best of the best of the species. 

And right now, a Super Queen by the name of Queen Kat was controlling the Jika hive that was stationed near Earth. And while she tolerated the un chosen consorts of her predecessor, who she herself had slain to take control of the hive. And since she already had an extra large batch of Super Consorts at her side. She realized that the native Earth women who the un-chosen consorts chose as their life partners, posed no personal threat to her or to the hive at large. And while usually such a thing was an executional offense. The output from these unchosen consorts who had pair bonded with a native of Earth was actually much higher than the ones who had not done so. And because of the situation between the Jika and Earth and the Federation and the very profitable alliance of the three. She knew it was best for the hive to simply tolerate the "other lesser Isthantaries". So for the good of the hive, she permitted it- but only with the understanding that the un-chosen consort's loyalty to her and to the hive be above their own loyalty and affection to their life partners and if the unchosen consorts ever stepped out of line or showed more loyalty or obedience to their Isthantaries or slacked in thier own duties- she could kill them with no recourse for their life partner.   

Which was why the unchosen consorts, if they chose to have a life partner, an Isthantari of their own besides their own queen- they did so at their own risk. And such a thing had to remain discrete if it was going to be permitted. 

But that did not stop the native Earth women who had pairbonded with the unchosen consorts who could call each other by Isthantari- from experimenting both with their Isthantaris and explore their differences in anatomy and what Kiara was currently doing- exploring the beautiful art she could create with her Isthantari Jarek’s cum as an art medium.

And while Jarek had never thought that his own cum could be useful or appreciated or admired for more that what it was intended to be- if he could blush, he would be- seeing his Isthantari practically covered in it and paint with it on her canvas', mixing in different pigments to create a masterpiece that was the product of their love and only hoped that when Kiara’s art gallery opening would not attract the unwanted attention of Queen Kat. But would hopefully get Kiara’s art talent even with such a thing as his cum as her medium- the recognition of being the great artist she was. 

“There, what do you think?” Kiara asked once she seemed to be done as she cleaned up the edges and put the lids back on the jars of the cum that she had put his cum into before she put them back into the refrigerator to keep “fresh” as paint. 

“It’s beautiful, just like you.” Jarek praised as he came over and massaged her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. 

“You say that about every piece of art I make.” Kiara giggled. 

“Well it’s as true with this one as it has been for all the others. The movement you created with the brush strokes is captivating.” He praised before he sprayed the canvas with a special solution from his spinnerette to keep the “art” that was on the canvas, both preserved yet fixed so it wouldn’t move when she would move the canvas and install it into the gallery before she carefully set it aside with the others. Eager to move into the section in the art gallery that weekend so she could show off her latest collection. And hopefully- gain at least recognition and notariety in the art circles.

[bumblingbabooshka]

OMG yea that was the thing about Tuvix that made me by far the most uncomfortable and it's hard to even hold it against him as a person but it must've been so fucking awkward for Kes like. Imagine your boyfriend and your dad get fused and then the fusion hits on you. My god...

This is the future liberals want Or: Voyager's Most Cursed Polycule

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Okay but like, is there any actual reasoning for Luke joining UNIT really beyond being Sarah Jane's son and being into science and dealing with aliens???? Because those are just either relations or things he does, his character is ignored though and that character in show anyway, wasn't shown to be into UNIT or at the very least, aware of how shit they can be from Sarah Jane.

[dragonstoned]

well if it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck then maybe some part of it has intrinsically become human i mean duck

re gomens ending i've seen suggestions that a/c physically become human and i'm not very into it, partly bc i like their supernatural bits, partly bc i want them to enjoy the earth for as long as possible, and partly bc. they are already human enough, actually

they've eagerly lived in our skins and long adopted our customs and culture and messy human feelings and loved existing in this way, in this world, and that's what matters. this is a big plot point and one i've always liked, and feel no need to change. i am happy to welcome them to the club no additional membership fees required, no other "final step"

while they are baffled by some things Whomst the among us actually understands all of humanity btw huh no one. the incomprehensibility of the human condition is a key feature of the human condition. also i dare anyone to say there haven't been pure homo sapien individuals who've ended up more Other and Eldritch than a/c could hope to be. we contain multitudes. unironically we are all special snowflakes in some way why gatekeep a/c bc of a little spot of immortality??

so yeah might be predictable but this is my ideal ending: crowley and aziraphale just as they are except without the threat of looming destruction over their heads, and It Is Good, but also why stop there. humanity™ for EVERYBODY who wants it tbh!!

heaven and hell are abolished and now it's everyone else's turn to discover their personhood here, on not god's who has long fucked off mysteriously our not-so-green anymore earth. it's lovely and terrible and wonderful welcome to the jungle. or they can go off elsewhere if they want its a big universe. no sides no limits as long as no one's harming others it's free real estate to exist on their own terms

anyway i digress!!!! hell yeah a/c become human in the end!!! bc they are!! by choice!!! but also they deserve at least another 6000 years to live on their own terms, freely, together!!! being an us!!! both a group-of-the-two-of-us us and an all-of-us, us

[ekdarnellbooks]

You may have gotten ahead of yourself when you signed up the alien mating agency.

You think this as you stand before your new alien husband, in your new home on an alien planet. You’re grateful he’s handsome, at least, in his own draconic way.

The fangs will take some getting used to, and the claws, and the… tail. He drags you to your new bedroom, eager to consummate his marriage with his little human bride.

Your alien husband whispers a safe word in your ear before throwing you on the bed. In a flash, he’s tearing your clothes off, his long pink tongue brushing across your cunt before squirming it’s way inside.

You writhe against him as he makes you cum, once, twice, your flesh tender as he fucks you with his tongue.

When he’s ready for you, you gape at the size of his cock, bigger than any you’d ever seen.

You tell him you won’t be able to take the size of him, but he assures you it’ll fit. He’ll make it fit.

All thoughts of using your safe word disappear from your head as your alien husband fills you to capacity, stretching you beyond the point of profusion. It burns as he works his way inside you, but stirs the arousal pulsing through you and you beg him for more.

With a fanged smile, he fucks you mercilessly, your cunt dripping as he brings you to the edge once more. Then he’s filling that cunt, his cunt, with sticky seed, letting it drip down your thighs as he continues fucking you.

Your alien husband is not done, not in the slightest, though he licks a kiss across your face as he lets you recover your breath, before plunging into you for another round.

[norrisleclercf1]

can you write the f1 dilfs sucking on tits cause it's a need not a want at this point love!!

A/N: I'm doing Lewis, Jenson, and Sebastian. Also warning for slight lactation kink, whoops

Lewis:

He's been dying for 9 months, to wrap his lips around your tits. He's missed them a lot more than he'd rather to admit, fuck even caught himself staring so damn hard he could almost feel your soft flesh in his mouth and the little whimpers you'd let loose when he swirls his tongue and gently bites, fuck he missed it like damn drug.

Yet, 9 months ago you decided to pierce both your nipples and when he found out, he got so damn hard and immediately went to suck on them. But when your hand pushed him back, he was so confused. "No touching," Lewis groans, reaching out again and you slap his hand. "Lewis, you can't touch them for a while," Lewis looks up shocked and you giggle at his confused face. "How long?" He groans staring at them, wanting to suck them into his mouth. "9 months."

So here he was, having finally reached the tail end of the 9 months and he couldn't wait to feel the metal on his tongue and the sweet whimpers he was about to pull out of your mouth. "Now can I?" He asks, and you look up from the couch. ever since you got them pierced, you haven't really worn a bra, wanting them to heal quicker.

"Sure," You giggle, Lewis wasted no time dipping his head down and slowly rolling his tongue over the sensitive nipple, dropping your phone, head rolling back you whimper when he lightly nips and you jump at the feeling. Lewis groans, having missed the feeling of it in his mouth. "Fucking gorgeous, now, I wonder if you could orgasm from this alone." You whine and nod your head wanting to find out if he could do this.

Jenson:

You don't know what it was, but you needed something to help you with your period. You kept thinking maybe it was a food craving. Going to the kitchen you whine when the food just made you twitch your nose. Okay, not a food craving maybe you wanted to be wrapped in warmth even though it was becoming spring, you needed it to be hotter. Nope, that just made you uncomfortable and you wanted to cry.

You try one last thing, which was you playing with your tits. You hiss at how sensitive they are, but it feels so good, but it's not enough. Looking at the clock you whine and throw yourself onto the couch as your boyfriend wasn't due home for another hour.

So closing your eyes and lying on the couch you have no shame ripping your bra off and tossing it somewhere. Wearing on of Jenson's soft white t-shirts you start to play with your tits, whining as it wasn't enough but just right for the moment.

Jenson smiles as he steps into the apartment, as he was bringing you flowers and your favorite products to help with the period. Moving down the hall he stops, seeing your bra just lying on the floor. "Sweetie?" Shrugging off his Mclaren jacket and hat he walks in and stops seeing the sight before him.

"Jense, they hurt. Help me?" He swears under his breath and moves forward, kicking off his shoes in the process. "Aww, sweetie, do they hurt?" You nod your head and remove your shirt, Jenson unable to stop himself as he licks his lips. "Suck them, please?" Jenson nods and drops to his knees, placing soft kisses everywhere but where you needed him.

"Jenseeeeee, please they're so sore." You're on the verge of crying when Jenson finally sucks the first nipple in, almost like a muscle has stopped being tight you relax and breath out in relief. Jenson smiles around and moves to the next one, relaxing even more as you tangle your fingers in his shirt hair tugging a little bit. He pulls off and licks around them before looking up at you and nipping at them, which has you whimpering. "Shhh, I've got."

Sebastian:

You loved your husband, but right now you hated the little alien inside you. You back hurt, bones aching, head pounding, your blood pressure was going up and down like crazy, you were once crazy horny that Sebastian joked like you were fucking like bunnies.

That caused you not to touch him for almost a month because you were so angry. He dealt with it all like a champ really. You couldn't have asked for a better husband or father of your child. But, right now you wanted to punch him awake as you felt like your breasts were about to burst.

He was peacefully sleeping and here you were, dying from the pain and the need to have them sucked on. "Seb," You whisper, poking him hard in his ribs. Sitting up quick you giggle at his wild ass curls sticking up everywhere. "What? What's wrong, are you okay?" He flips on a light and stops seeing the glare and how you're no longer wearing a shirt, much less a bra. Sebastian looks you over and notices how swollen your breasts look and sigh.

"Need me to suck on them, hmm?" You groan and move, getting comfortable as he lazily lies down and sucks on into his mouth. Hissing you relax slowly with each suck his mouth does. Sebastian puts a little bit more pressure and groan when something wet lands on his tongue. Pulling off his moans, and smirks up at you. Neither of you say anything as when he was driving for red bull and you two first started to date, you were made clear of his kinks.

But now with him Ferrari, he seemed to become the one in control, but you sometimes missed those days and right now you felt like it was the old times. "Fuck, you're gorgeous, growing out baby, providing for them, fuck." Sebastian goes to your other breast as the other wasn't as swollen anymore.

Whining you pull him closer, as he sucks even pulling out some milk. In that moment you didn't care it just felt to damn good.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

love how Solar Opposites started out as a sitcom about two aliens who can't stand each other, stuck with their teenage clones (whom they also can't stand) & a toddler antichrist (whom they view as a sort of self-sufficient free-roaming hamster?) on a stupid planet they can't stand

and 4 seasons later it's a sitcom about a family of genderqueer aliens, headed by a gay couple in a happy & horny open marriage (with a graphic off-screen sex life, despite their canonical lack of genitalia?) teaching themselves to be okay parents to their 3 kids (whose Sci-Fi Antics now slightly-less-frequently revolve around wreaking havoc on human bystanders, and slightly-more-frequently revolve around alien-clone-sibling-bonding*), to the point that the central plot point becomes "We need to provide our toddler antichrist with a stable home environment."

(also the grumpy alien husband is too busy ingratiating his family with their suburban neighbors to even remember whom or what he dislikes. what is this show)

[qingxin-dream]

Scara relaxing on the couch with you<3 if u do NSFW having him cockwarm you so he can relax

“𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈𝐭 𝐑𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬, 𝐈𝐭 𝐏𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬”

summary | today was one of those days where nothing could go right. well, maybe, it’s been like that for awhile. and you know damn well that your loving husband was not about to watch you fall into despair. (art credits: unknown)

warnings | not proofread, reader has a mental breakdown, comfort, profanity, smut [18+, MDNI], female-bodied reader, cockwarming, edging/teasing, orgasm denial, slightly possessive/dominant, marking, breeding kink, creampie

genre | modern au, comfort, smut

word count | 3k

pairing | husband! scaramouche x reader

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

The sky had been overcast all day, only putting a damper on your mood. Work has somehow become extra stressful lately with more and more responsibilities piling up. You felt the crushing weight on your shoulders with each passing hour and you couldn’t wait for the clock to hit 5pm.

The last place you wanted to be was at work, away from home, and without your husband, Scaramouche. Even then, your relationship was getting to a point where it was nothing more than bitter roommates. He had missions to complete while you were obligated to work every day. Someone had to be the breadwinner, after all.

Sweet freedom washes over your exhausted body when it’s finally time to go home. You rush outside only to find that the clouds had turned a nasty gray color and wet droplets of rain dotted your suit jacket.

Great, you forgot an umbrella.

The rain was really picking up now, your clothes soaked and your hair flattening into drenched clumps. Running through the downpour, you had to make it another block to your car until you got stopped at an intersection—narrowly avoiding the wave of water a speeding car almost splashed onto you.

Once you practically leaped into your car for safety, the sense of stillness that suddenly permeated the air brought you back down to earth. You were more than overworked. You were burned out, with hot tears freely streaming down your face in a choked sob. Gripping the steering wheel, you slumped your forehead onto your knuckles, shoulders shaking as you cried out all the pressure you had bottled up inside. The rain beat against the windshield, drowning out your agony.

Once you managed to compose yourself with a few sad sniffles here and there, you turned the key in the ignition. Tonight you decided to forget about everything. No stress. No work. Not even a single load of laundry. You couldn’t muster the strength for anything other than some sort of self-care or self-indulgence.

When you walked through the door with an expression bordering on despair, Scaramouche knew you had a rough day. He frowned to himself. Frankly, the distance between you two was a sore spot for him as of late and he was expecting you to lock yourself in the bedroom.

At first, he had been stubborn about the tangible separation pushing you further and further away from him. Foolishly, Scaramouche had tried to drown himself in his busy work and missions, simply trying to ignore it. But after a while, he realized that this damned feeling of alienation and being constantly on edge like some old married couple was ridiculous.

That’s not who he married or the life he signed up for, and Scaramouche found himself determined to finally act like you both loved each other for once.

“Hey, babe,” he greeted you from the couch. Looking down at his casual sweatpants and shirt, you wished you could’ve stripped down and lazed around on the couch this afternoon. Sleep was something you desperately needed. He offers a small olive branch with his softened tone of voice. “Why don’t you get changed and come sit with me? I missed you.”

You drew in a hesitant breath. Perhaps it was your way of attempting to decompress before answering your husband or you were unsure of his intentions. The couch was definitely calling to you, and the prospect of your lover’s comforting arms enveloping you was even more tempting. In a haste, you kicked off your shoes and dropped your bag, nodding with a bit of a pitiful pout on your lips as you went into the bedroom.

Scaramouche perked up slightly upon hearing your return, making room for you on the couch so that he could spoon you just right. As you sat down, his hand immediately went to your hip and he found himself gravitating toward the comforting crevice of your neck. Your skin was colder than he expected from the rain but he was more than willing to share his warmth with you, his fingers venturing up the contour of your waist under your baggy shirt.

“There’s goosebumps on your skin,” he noted with an obvious smile in his voice. “Why don’t you take this off and let me warm you up, hm?”

You gaze at him over your shoulder, catching the subtle seductive intonation of his offer. Despite his pads of his fingers gently caressing and massaging your hip in encouragement, you weren’t entirely sure if you had it in you for too much physical affection. Most of all, you just felt tired.

Yet, Scaramouche always got his way. Maybe it was how the words rolled off his tongue that sparked your imagination in the back of your mind, or that mischievous gleam of excitement in his violet eyes. He had no problem catering to your needs, helping you slowly lift that baggy shirt over your shoulders and tossing it aside. He quickly did the same.

Suddenly, he ensnared you in his arms, burying his nose in your neck and sighing. The feeling of your back pressed against his bare, muscular chest was like a balm soothing his soul. You couldn’t help but chuckle lightly, surprised by his enthusiasm, and pull a heavy blanket over you both.

“Better get rid of these too,” Scaramouche suggested softly into the shell of your ear, tugging at the elastic waistband of your shorts. He generously nuzzled your neck, peppering a few kisses across your sensitive skin to distract you as he easily slipped you out of your bottoms.

Your whimpers were buried in your throat. You purposely tried to stifle it, but the little shiver of your neck and body against his ministrations couldn’t hide your true feelings forever. The slow drag of his hand up your plush thighs, over the round of your hip, and dangerously close to your breasts was merely a confirmation of your suspicions.

“Scara… please,” you murmur, sounding more like a faint plea for peace and relaxation. “My feet hurt so much. I don’t think I can move anymore, let alone do—”

“Shhh, love, you really think I’m going to make you do anything?” he asks rhetorically, the timbre of his sweet words deepening to a level bordering on husky. His hand travels back down the curves of your body with silent reverence, hoping to ease your worries. “I don’t think you realize how hard you’ve been working until it breaks you.”

With a click of his tongue, your husband continues to let his hand journey over every inch of your lovely form. Your breasts, your stomach, your pelvis, hips, thighs… If he was being honest, Scaramouche would never have thought he’d discover someone as perfectly imperfect as you. To not remind you of how much he secretly worships your whole being would be a grave sin in his eyes.

“I feel like I never see you anymore. We never talk anymore,” he mumbles into your shoulder blade, taking his time to kiss and nibble as much of your upper back as he could. You involuntarily arched your back, the sensation of his mouth along your spine sending pulses of electric desire through you. His voice shifts into a possessive growl. “And I miss my wife.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” you weep dryly, rolling your head back to relax on him fully. Your thoughts instantly short-circuited at the revelation of his thick bulge pressing into the plush of your ass, tactically held in place by his fingertips digging into your love handle. You were so ready to just melt into him completely, to give in and let him take care of you.

“Don’t ask for my forgiveness,” he quickly interjected to correct you. You could feel the smirk spreading on his face as he leans into you as much as possible. The back of his hand ghosts your inner thigh, nudging it to the side. “Show me how much you want my mercy.”

You were hanging on every syllable that left his lips in a hushed whisper. A featherlight touch grazed near your outer labia, enough to capture your attention like a moth to a flame. That was all it took for him to push your mind over the edge. It was pathetic, really, how you were desperately trying to mentally fill in the blanks and imagine the pleasure of his slender fingers massaging your needy clit.

Scaramouche knew exactly what he was doing. He loved getting a rise out of you. Admiring the subtle contortion of your features in pleasure may be his favorite pastime. Tickling the insides of your thighs and skirting skillfully around the one place you wanted him most, he scoffed in amusement every time you sighed softly in frustration.

“I thought you were going to be nice,” you groaned impatiently, beginning to lazily roll your hips in rhythm with the intermittent brush of his fingers just shy of your cunt.

“I am,” he snickered into your collarbone, his hot breath pouring down your chest and thrilling your skin. “You can’t lie to me. I know you like when I tease you until you’re begging for me to stuff you to the brim.”

Taking your lower lip between your teeth, you managed to defiantly buck your hips forward and finally feel the tantalizing glide of his index and middle fingers between your slick folds. The sweet victory ripped a lewd moan of your lover’s name from your pretty throat. To say you were utterly addicted to the sound of him parting the lips of your glistening pussy might be an understatement.

“Tsk, tsk, good things come to those who wait. Isn’t that what you humans say?” Scaramouche mocks you lightheartedly, though his fingers don’t leave your clit. Rather, he circles the sensitive nub at a tantalizingly slow pace to earn another cock-twitching moan from your angelic mouth. “I could touch you like this all night… unless you’d rather serve your punishment on my cock instead?”

You were too preoccupied with the intoxicating pleasure concentrated on your aching clit, eyelashes resting on your cheeks and jaw slightly agape. Scaramouche chuckled deeply into your ear with satisfaction, returning his lips to your neck but this time with a little more force. His teeth sunk into you, intent on leaving a good bruise.

It would be a clear reminder in the morning of who you belong to.

He sucked a little harder, causing you to yelp in a mixture of both pain and pleasure. His words were muffled against your skin with a gentle scolding. “I asked you a question.”

“C-cock, please,” you nearly choke, starting to grind sloppily onto his hand for some sense of relief. His other arm underneath you tightened, essentially pinning you to the heat radiating from his body from behind.

“Whose cock?” Scaramouche grumbled jealously at your vague plea. He needed to know that you didn’t just want anyone’s cock to fill up your drenched, gummy hole. The intensity of his violet irises demanded an answer, glued to your blissed out and desperate expression. His fingers were hastily stimulating your clit as he intently watched you parse love and lust on the brink of an orgasm.

“Y-your cock! Please! I need it so bad,” you cried out loudly, the threat of tears lingering behind your eyes. He abruptly slapped a hand over your mouth to quiet your moans, and then shoved his hot, veiny cock pulsating with desire across your soaking wet entrance.

Scaramouche couldn’t stop the salacious groans under his breath, wanting you to hear all the ways you make him unravel. He was eager to drag the mushroomed, pink tip of his cock over your clit over and over, occasionally teasing your hole with the pressure of his length trying to nestle itself within you. But he never pushed it all in. Instead, he continued to gather your essence on his cock—the mere thought of cumming in your rosy folds like this and fucking it messily drove him wild.

“Don’t tell me… hnnnghh… that this is all you want, (Y/N),” he grunted with honeyed pleasure, grinding at a little faster rhythm. You were already nearing your climax again, whispering prayers and praises under your breath for Scaramouche to plunge into you and fuck you senseless.

His hand was still tightly covering your mouth, so you simply shake your head and moan breathily to ask for more.

“Mm, good girl,” he mumbles intimately, kissing your ear and nuzzling you affectionately again. “I know my baby is tired and needy, so I’ll let you be my little cocksleeve tonight, okay?”

You nod and hum against his hand enthusiastically.

He takes the opportunity to shower you with a few more kisses, lining the tip of his cock with your entrance once more. Your walls were already squeezing eagerly on the small inch of his tip inside you and he didn’t dare delay any longer. Scaramouche grabs you by the hip and buries the entirety of his thick cock in your slick tightness, his eyebrows crinkling at the feeling of your pussy clenching around him like a vice.

“F-fuck!” Scaramouche curses sharply, bottoming out completely in your aroused cunt. “So good. S-so fucking good, yeah…”

“A-ah, yes! Mm…” you sighed raggedly with ecstasy, pure pleasure and relief washing over you. His huge cock was stretching you perfectly, the lips of your pussy sucking him in at every possible chance. Despite your exhaustion, your husband had wound you up so much that you begged for tiniest semblance of a thrust into your sopping hole. “Oh my god, p-please, fuck me.”

Without warning, you decided to selfishly fuck yourself on his throbbing cock, but Scaramouche instantly snatched your throat. He held you tightly against his pecs and craned your neck with a forceful grip so that you were facing the ceiling, your oxygen partially cut off. The submissive position had your spongy walls dilating in excitement.

“No, no, wait,” he chastised you, his voice cracking slightly at the end as he struggled to adjust to your greedy cunt. “N-Need I remind you, love? Good things come to those who wait; and if you’re lucky, I’ll cum in you.”

He couldn’t believe your pussy was still quaking around his girth, releasing your neck as you nodded obediently. Once he pulled you into him tightly with his strong arms around your stomach, Scaramouche nudged your legs closed so that you could completely envelope his cock. It was incredibly hot every time he shifted to get more comfortable and your walls only swallowed him further. His breathing calmed slightly, wanting to relax with you for the rest of the night deep within your cunt.

“I-It feels too good, Scara,” you whined, cuddling into the pillow on the couch and clutching the warm blanket to your chest.

For the love of Celestia, your body was so exhausted from work but at the same time you wished you had the strength to fuck him like crazy. You made a mental note to wake him up tomorrow morning with the feeling of your folds lubricating his hardened cock, sinking completely onto his impressive length when his pretty indigo eyes sleepily opened for the first time. You’d make sure to hush him and keep his sleeping mask on snugly, fucking him to your heart’s content.

But for now, your husband returned to worshipping the expanse of your soft curves, coaxing you to relax despite the occasional twitch of his cock inside you. Scaramouche’s voice was smooth as silk when he whispered into the crook of your neck, “See? That wasn’t so bad now. Why don’t you turn on your show and I’ll keep this pretty pussy of yours company for as long as you need, hm?”

You both melted into each other’s embrace, connected in every way imaginable for the first time in a long time. The sensation of your lover’s cock nestling into your folds slowly nudged your sweet spot, drawing breathy moans out of you. He thrusted slowly but deeply, marveling at the lust clouding your eyes pushing you just a little bit closer to the edge.

Though Scaramouche was enraptured by the heavenly sound of your pussy slurping his cock, the need burning in his core was beginning to overtake him. “Mm, turn around for me, babe.”

He was gentle and attentive to you as he helped you face him, holding you firmly against his chest and quickly ensuring his cock didn’t leave your cunt for too long. As he stuffed you full, his mouth captured yours in a passionate kiss. His fingers dug into your hair, keeping your lips planted on his as you lazily swirled your tongue on his own and moaned his name.

“Nnghh, can’t take it anymore,” Scaramouche growled hungrily into your mouth, lifting your leg slightly to support you so he could delve his cock deeper. His tone trailed off in a quiet beg, “Lemme breed you, (Y/N). Please…”

“Mhmm,” you agreed without hesitation, cupping your lover’s cheek and kissing him with growing reckless abandon.

He was unequivocally smitten by your ardent claim to his lips, groaning lewdly into the kiss as he began to fuck your desperately pulsating pussy. His grip on you tightened, focusing solely on ravaging your walls until you were on the verge of screaming his praise.

“Hah, that’s it. Goddamn it, I’m gonna fucking ruin you,” he takes your lower lip between his teeth roughly, plunging ruthlessly and chasing his impending orgasm. “You can take it, you can take it, yeah… you better fucking cum all over me or else, I swear…”

You reeled him in with a firm tug of his dark purple locks, nearly crying in pleasure onto his tongue intermingling with yours. Moaning and whimpering like a whore, you clutched onto your lover like your life depended on it. “O-Oh my god, Scara, shit, I’m cumming! I’m… mmph, f-fucking c-cumming…!”

Scaramouche pounded his cock into your sopping release, a guttural groan escaping him as he generously coated your spasming walls with loads of his hot seed. He kept himself buried in your cum-laden folds, your erotic juices mixing around the base of his cock while he kissed you softly.

“God… you have no idea how much I missed you.”

thanks for reading! reblogs are appreciated. my masterlist.

[persephoneflouwers]

-

[amarguerite]

One thing I think is very interesting (but that I have no coherent thesis about) is how the age gap “I have known you all your life” romance between Emma and Mr. Knightley seems like a repeated trope in 19th century novels and is often framed as a really good thing (eg Mr. Brooke and Meg in Little Women)

It’s so weird to me and I have such inchoate thoughts about it because it’s a trope that’s aged like milk. My twenty-first century reaction to reading that Mr. Knightley’s known Emma since she was a literal child, or that Mr. Brooke got interested in Meg when she was only 17, is “NOPE NOPE NOPE”

But… on the other hand, marriage was SO DIFFERENT in the 19th century, and ideas of what it should do and what what you should consider going into it, and how it changes a woman’s status both legally and socially are also very alien now. If you are in a system where you are raised knowing that you must marry, that that’s the only right and respectable path in life BUT ALSO that your whole life from that point will be completely dependent ton your husband and his income and his decisions…

Well, “You’ve known this guy you’re whole life and he’s been consistently a good person to you,” is actually a really good argument in his favor? It makes for a really safe option in a time when you had to gamble on some dude willing to marry you. (But then I get to the point of, ‘well why the age gap then, what’s wrong with being the same age in the 19th century,’ and I’ve got some more thinking to do. Something something economic stability or maybe some weird social ideas about gendered maturity levels?)

[reyrapidsbutgayer]

Ranking All Elden Ring Bosses by Fuckability

It was only a matter of time until I made a post like this.

In this hypothetical all of the bosses can be reasonably communicated with and are not actively trying to kill you.

Repeat bosses not included, duo bosses counted seperate.

It should also be assumed that all of these bosses have access to their magic/items/resources to benefit them in bed.

Explanation of Grading system:

Ineligible: (Cannot give consent)

These characters are not sentient enough to communicate consent, or are physically incapable of sex.

Unfuckable: (Can give consent, but does not DESERVE sex)

Character sucks so badly that they do not deserve to experience pleasure in any shape or form.

Uninterested: (Can give consent, does not WANT sex)

These character are fully capable of sex but would never participate in sex due to lack of interest or overabundance of moral convictions.

Not worth it: (Can give consent, is terrible in bed)

I mean, you COULD have sex with these characters but why would you?

Acceptable: (Can give consent, would be fine in bed)

These characters are average in bed, nothing crazy or noticeable. Some might end up in this category because they ARE good at sex, but the entire process would be inconvenient or uncomfortable to initiate.

Good Time: (Can give consent, would be great in bed)

These characters are good at sex, give or take a few points depending on their mood or situation.

Knock your socks off: (Can give consent, would be amazing in bed)

These characters excel in giving pleasure and would be well worth the time and effort involved.

Sex God: (Can give consent, would be the best in bed)

These characters would be so good at sex that all other factors are irrelevant. They are serving and we are here for it.

Evil Sex God: (Can give consent, is a terrible person but you’d make an exception.)

These are characters that should fall lower in the rankings, but their sexual prowess supersedes their inherent awfulness to a noteworthy degree.

Full list below the read more. Obviously it's not going to be sfw.

Ineligible: (Cannot give consent)

Dragonkin Soldier:

Mindless beast

Astel, Naturalborn of the Void

Weird rock alien, doesn't/can't understand.

Fia's Champions:

Ghosts, simps.

Regal Ancestor Spirit

Animal

Erdtree Avatar

A plant

Great Wyrm Theodorix

Mindless beast.

Ulcerated Tree Spirit

A plant, no junk

Tibia Mariner:

Skeleton

Red Wolf of the Champion:

Animal.

Full-Grown Fallingstar Beast

Weird rock alien, doesn't/can't understand.

Abductor Virgin

First off, just some snakes in a robot. Second, virgin.

Erdtree Burial Watchdog

Stone gargoyle

Crystalians

Non-organic

Mad Pumpkin Heads

Unable to consent due to madness.

Cemetery Shade

Unable to consent due to mind controlling parasite.

Spirit-Caller Snail

Animal

Runebear

Animal

Miranda the Blighted Bloom

A plant

Guardian Golem

Stone gargoyle

Starscourge Radahn:

Unable to consent due to madness

Unfuckable: (Can give consent, but does not DESERVE sex)

Elden Beast:

Too catholic.

Sir Gideon Ofnir, the All-Knowing:

Dick game weak - unironically posts joker memes.

Omenkiller:

Basically a cop.

Necromancer Garris:

Killed his family, not a good husband.

Royal Revenant:

Won't stop screaming (in an unsexy way)

Godrick the Grafted:

Incel - Also all that murder and torture business but mostly the Incel stuff.

Uninterested: (Can give consent, does not WANT sex)

Valiant Gargoyle:

Could probably have sex if it wanted to, but is kinda going through a lot right now. Ya know, that whole "Is made of several corpses mashed together" thing.

Malenia, Blade of Miquella:

Look, I ALSO wanted her to higher up on this list, but let's be honest here. Her body is rotting and falling apart, she just isn't up for sex in her current form. In her prime? She'd be top of the list. She's the daughter of Marika and Radagon, she'd be playing fuck/marry/kill with every warrior who crossed her path. (in that order)

Death Rite Bird:

I think it might be physically capable of sex, but is too busy burning corpses to bother with stuff like that.

Black Blade Kindred:

Same reason as the Valiant Gargoyle but you might have like 2% more of a chance because they are goth.

Maliketh, the Black Blade:

Would normally be a sex god, but is too religious. Probably took a vow about this sort of thing.

Morgott, the Omen King:

You kidding me? This guy has the same energy as a repressed youth pastor. He's gonna be a virgin till the day he dies. The dude sided with the same religious order that locked him a sewer and tried to kill him. He's not out there getting phone numbers he's too busy praying and judging others for their 'impure thoughts'.

Draconic Tree Sentinel:

Married to his job, also physically chained to his horse. He ain't taking off that armor anytime soon.

Wormface:

Too sad, leave him alone his face is full of worms.

Tree Sentinel:

Same as the Draconic Tree Sentinel but he's a tiny bit more naive so you might have a better chance.

Elder Dragon Greyoll:

Too sleepy, but still kinda a milf.

Grafted Scion:

There might be some genitals in there somewhere but I don't think they know how or even want to use them.

Not worth it: (Can give consent, is terrible in bed)

Esgar, Priest of Blood:

No sense of hygiene, is always covered in blood (in an unsexy way)

Mohg, Lord of Blood:

This loser is dripping with all the least sexy bodily fluids and he has sharp horns sticking out of him. Even if you got him in bed you'd only enjoy like 5% of it. Plus you just know he'd be all needy afterwards and try to get you to join his MLM.

Borealis the Freezing Fog:

Too cold, not a snuggler.

Elemer of the Briar:

The armor stays ON during sex.

Kindred of Rot:

It's like all the worst possible aspects of alien biology, it won't be nearly as fun as you hoped.

Sanguine Noble:

Same as all the other Mohg followers, too sticky and too smelly.

Decaying Ekzykes:

He's sick right now, leave him alone.

Acceptable: (Can give consent, would be fine in bed)

Loretta, Knight of the Haligtree:

I'm sure she'd be a decent lover. Maybe a little overzealous but she'd has good intentions.

Grave Warden Duelist:

I mean these guys are hot and probably fuck like a truck but they are not the most caring lovers, also they are covered in live snakes so there is that.

Night's Cavalry:

If you like goth knights I'm sure they'd be fine.

Onyx Lord:

Their skin probably feels like stone, but I bet they can pull off all sorts of freaky zero-g sex stuff if you ask them.

Alabaster Lord:

Same as the Onyx Lord but slightly more goth.

Fell Twins:

Once you get past the horns and stuff I bet the Omens are actually pretty good in bed, just watch out.

Demi-Human Queens:

I feel like all Demi-humans are pretty good lovers but their biology probably has some unexpected drawbacks.

Stonedigger Troll:

If you can get past the texture and the size I bet they could be decent in bed.

Flying Dragon Greyll:

A surprisingly unsexy dragon, but a dragon is a dragon and still worth at least a one night stand.

Glintstone Dragon Adula:

A dragon willing to kill racist magic users, earns them a few extra points.

Beastman of Farum Azula:

On one hand the Beastmen probably have crazy mating skills, but they are also zombies, which detracts some points for all the decay.

Battlemage Hugues:

Contrary to popular belief, Wizards are not very good at sex. They spend all their time studying instead of partying, at least Hugues is willing to get his hands dirty.

Commander O'Neil:

Seems like a decent guy, but probably won't shut up about his time in the military. Also he is infected with scarlet rot so that might be a mood killer.

Bloodhound Knight Darriwil:

The bloodhound knights are probably pretty wild in bed if you can earn their loyalty, but good luck with that.

Adan, Thief of Fire:

The dude committed heresy, that has to earn him some sexy points.

Soldier of Godrick:

He's a good boy, he's doing his job so throw him a bone.

Flying Dragon Agheel:

One of the first dragons you encounter, so he earns some points for style.

Demi-Human Chief:

Same as the queens, but probably a bit rougher in bed.

Good Time: (Can give consent, would be great in bed)

Lichdragon Fortissax:

A much sexier dragon, you know they were hooking up with Godwin. Only loses some points for all the death rot.

Crucible Knight Siluria:

A bit gloomy, but I bet the crucible knights can do all sorts of freaky stuff with their animal body parts.

Mimic Tear:

A slippery liquid shapeshifter, need I say more?

Commander Niall:

A way better guy than O'Niel, plus he just a bit more daddy energy.

Fire Giant:

Once you get past his size, his sadness and the giant fell god of destruction in his chest, I bet he's got something going on.

Ancient Hero of Zamor:

Gives me Hercules/Amazonian vibes, I could be into it.

Cleanrot Knight:

Lesbian activities detected.

Crucible Knight:

These guys have tails, horns, wings and big old throat sacks. Imagine the possibilities.

Glintstone Dragon Smarag:

Has a sword. If you hear "Dragon holding a sword" and your pants aren't already off, we can't be friends.

Bols, Carian Knight:

He seems like a good boy.

Scaly Misbegotten:

I feel like the Misbegotten have some really interesting possibilities with their animal biology. I bet they have bonobo type societies and that could be fun.

Leonine Misbegotten:

Same as the other Misbegotten.

Misbegotten Warrior:

Same as the other Misbegotten.

Knock your socks off: (Can give consent, would be amazing in bed)

Crucible Knight Ordovis:

Has all the desirable traits of a Crucible Knight but I also imagine they are super into threesomes.

Perfumer Tricia:

She seems really nice, and would be a super attentive lover. Plus she probably has access to crazy drugs and could hook you up.

Nox Swordstress & Nox Priest:

You just know that the Nox were getting up to crazy hot and crazy unethical experiments in their underground cities. These two probably get up to some wild shit and they are inviting you to join them.

Rennala, Queen of the Full Moon:

As she is now, I bet she'd be too sad to really be in a relationship again. But she kept up with Radagon and you just know she has some tricks up her sleeves that could make you abandon the golden order.

Sex God: (Can give consent, would be the best in bed)

Dragonlord Placidusax:

Has two male heads and three female heads, imagine...

Ancient Dragon Lansseax:

Formed a whole freaky dragon/human cult and you just know they got into some eyes-wide-shut orgies behind those doors.

Godfrey, First Elden Lord (Hoarah Loux):

We all knew he'd be this high on the list. He was just a normal dude but he managed to keep pace with Queen Marika (Who is basically a goddess of fertility) for a good long while. He will fold you in half (on the battlefield and in the bedroom.)

Evil Sex God: (Can give consent, is a terrible person but you’d make an exception.)

Radagon of the Golden Order:

He sucks in all the worst ways, but I mean... You can't NOT. Both Radagon and Marika are the embodiment of evil but they managed to suck and fuck their way across an entire continent for generations. You HAVE to give a try at least once.

Godskin Duo:

Oh my god will it be awful with all those flayed human skins, but you know you are still gonna have to. They can stretch and do all sorts of freaky stuff with their bodies, plus they kill gods and nothing is sexier than heresy.

Vyke, Knight of the Roundtable:

The dude is a mad killer but... he can still probably get it, might as well give it a try.

God-Devouring Serpent / Rykard, Lord of Blasphemy:

Personally I wouldn't, he's a loser and will probably kill you. But he is also a giant snake made up of squirming hands doing all sorts of sexual experiments, I can't blame you if you want to give it a taste.

Black Knife Assassin:

They committed a whole lot of treason but the power of armored lesbians is too hard to resist.

Patches:

If you are already having sex with from software characters, you gotta give Patches at least one attempt. When you wake up he'll have robbed you, but you knew what you were getting into.

[multific]

All You Wanted

Ultimate Predator x Reader

Read Part 1 here. Part 3

Warnings: human x alien relationship, incorrect description of pregnancy and birth 

Summary: Maybe being pregnant wasn't all sunshine and rainbows, but having your strong and big mate close did help.

You felt so sick at times you couldn't even move.

You felt so sick at times you couldn't even eat.

If it wasn't for the huge Yautja telling you that you need to eat something, you wouldn't have.

You know he was worried.

He liked to plan everything ahead. It is what he was created for after all, to plan and to execute. 

And as your pregnancy progressed, it became more and more difficult to plan. As your belly began to show, you grew weaker. You could barely sleep or move.

But you weren't broken. Oh, not one bit. You knew you needed to be strong for both of you. You wanted this child more than anything.

You were glad that your Mate often checked your and the baby's health. It at least gave you an idea of what was going on, he also tried to explain everything simply so you would understand.

Then, one day, almost everything changed.

You started to crave the food you couldn't keep down for weeks. Your energy was back and you could sleep a lot easier.

It was strange, but you didn't complain. 

Then one evening.

"I wish to be in water." you said suddenly and you could tell the translator had issues.

He looked at you before pointing at the shower.

"No. I need a lake or something." Lake. On that planet? You must have gone insane.

But there was a small pond close by.

He found it not too long ago when looking around the planet. His dog kept you company while he left.

And so, when you requested for water, he brought you there.

You wanted to enter as soon as you arrived but he put up an arm, stopping you.

He entered the water, and soon you understood why he stopped you. He was waist-deep in. Which meant the water had to be very deep, thankfully you did know how to swim. 

While he knew the water wasn't toxic, he checked if there were any creatures living in there which could hurt you.

You had a rather comfortable cloth wrapped around you, you usually slept in that but you thought it would be better not to be naked in the water. Even if there were no creatures on this abandoned planet.

When he found nothing, he put his arm up, you took his hand as he lifted you towards him, slowly, he eased you into the water.

It was cold, which did make you hiss a little, it made him flinch as he pulled you back up out of the water. You placed a hand on his shoulder, letting him know it was okay, and so, he put you back into the water.

As you slowly swam around, thankful for the water and how easy it made your movement.

He walked out of the pond, clicking something to the dog as it sat up. You watched as he walked away. You assumed he had to check on something.

You were leaning against the stone when you heard a shuffle behind you.

You turned and saw your mate, moving to join you hopefully. 

"It is a lot better like this." you told him as he sat down behind you across the small pond. "The little one keeps moving and I can't get comfortable though." You knew he wouldn't understand, you didn't have any means of translation. 

You turned back, and with your back to him, you moved slightly, leaning against the ground.

Your mate slowly got back into the water as he walked over to you, slowly pulling you closer to his chest. One hand on your belly as he moved you. 

"Thank you." you said with a slight groan as you felt another kick against your husband's hand.

The yautja slowly turned you in the water. 

You slowly moved in the water, feeling weightless. You placed your hand on top of his hand which rested on your belly. 

You felt the little one move and by the twinkle in his eye, so did he.

You smiled as you looked around, you weren't outside the home that often, while the planet did have many trees, or at least what you would call trees, and plants, it was fully abandoned. Noone lived there only the creatures which roamed the green planet. 

This planet was a lot like your mate, you noted.

This planet reminded you a lot of the elements, survival of the fittest and your mate was certainly that, a survivor.

An outcast but still a strong male.

You slowly relaxed against him as he held you. His rough skin actually felt really good against yours. You often found yourself running your fingers down his scales. 

Suddenly, he moved you to his other side as he walked to one side of the pond. He let go of you, leaving you there as you watched him walk across before turning. He put on his hands out, motioning for you to go to him, to swim.

"Alright." you simply said as you slowly started to swim to him, although you were tired, it did feel nice to move a little. Each time you reached him, he moved to the other side, or while you were swimming, he moved and you followed. You really enjoyed the water moving around you as you swam. You could tell it also calmed your little one.  

Once your little work out, was completed, he scooped you up and walked back to the house.

You let him change your clothes before he put you to bed.

---

You had a suspicion that your pregnancy wouldn't take nine months.

Deep down, you were preparing every passing day. 

Yet, somehow, you were still not ready when the pains started.

There was no point in hiding it, you were about to give birth. You might not be ready, but your baby and your body certainly felt like you were.

Not even the pain was the worst part.

Not even the fact that you were about to give birth to a completely different species. It was the fear of you doing something wrong and it would affect the baby in a way you can't correct.

It is all you could think about as your mate hooks you up to all these machines. You heard two heart beats, your own and the baby's.

He even gave you some pain killers. Making sure you were comfortable before you had to start pushing.

You lost a lot of blood during giving birth. You fainted in and out of consciousness twice before he hooked you up to another machine. 

The third time, you heard cries before fainting, knowing you did it, you gave birth to a little boy and you could finally rest, it was as if your body shut down.

You woke up hours later.

It was so quiet and you were back on your huge bed, covered in furs.

You were so disoriented you didn't know what was happening. For a second you panicked when you didn't feel your baby bump anymore.

Then you noticed something in the room with you.

Not too far from you was the small bed which he made during your pregnancy. 

And in it was your babe, sleeping. You looked around, but couldn't find your mate.

You slowly moved in the bed, everything hurt but you needed to see the little one.

You slowly stood up, falling back on the bed as your legs could barely hold you, you nearly groaned out in pain that hit your abdomen. But you still wanted to see the little baby.

So, you tried again.

This time, you were able to stand but your legs were shaking as you couldn't take a step.

The little crib was so close to you, yet so far.

So, you needed a plan.

You moved back on the bed, shuffling as close to the little bed as you could before standing, this time you were able to catch a glimpse.

Your little one was sleeping on his belly. From what you could see he looked more alien than human.

You did fear you would give birth to a creature so bizarre, but from what you can see, his little face looked just like your mate's. 

His sight gave you some confidence as you were able to take a step closer, then another before finally arriving to the crib.

And there he was.

Beautiful little one. Rather big but he looked healthy. And you knew if he wasn't he probably wasn't sleeping here with you. You placed your hand on the crib before slowly walking back to the bed behind you. Positioning it right next to you so you could take a better look at him as you sat down.

You wanted to hold him. Your arms were itching to hold him but you couldn't wake him. 

Instead, you put your fingers through the bars and ran them down his little back.

He had scaly skin, and adorable little mandibles, he already looked annoyed much like an older version of a yautja and yet he looked so amazingly cute. 

You wondered if he had the same yellow eyes you had grown to love.

You wondered what, if any, human did he have in him. He certainly didn't look human. 

But he didn't have claws. Or at least not yet. his little fingers found yours as they wrapped them around yours. 

You counted all five, five little fingers and five little toes. 

Then he flinched a little before slowly waking.

You watched in awe. And something in you switched. 

All your long nights of worry, fearing if you would be a good mother if you knew what your baby needed, all boiled down to right here and right now.

He was about to cry, you knew he was.

Your body moved on its own, slowly lifting him out of the crib and putting him against your chest.

Slowly bouncing him as you kissed his forehead. He calmed down rather quickly. Not even making a sound as you moved in the bed. You moved to sit up against the pillows and be a little more comfortable.

Now that you had him in your arms.

You had a feeling Yautja women didn't raise their children this way. But you were no yautja.

You wondered how you would be able to feed him, given his mandibles were small and he had no teeth, maybe it wouldn't be a problem.

Then the door to your bedroom hissed open and there he stood.

Your eyes locked with his as he stopped in the doorway.

For just a second you worried you weren't supposed to take the babe from his crib but then you saw it in his eyes, it wasn't that.

He clicked something and the translator that he installed in the home did the trick.

"How are you feeling?"

"A lot better now that I am holding him." he waited a second for the translation before nodding. The door closed behind him as he walked over to the bed. Slowly sitting down next to you.

His huge frame didn't scare you anymore. You fit right next to him like a puzzle. He moved one of his arms behind you, pulling you to him as he looked down at you and the little one.

"Is he healthy?" you asked and he nodded.

"Strong, healthy and cried his eyes out to be with you." he said. "It isn't true yautja custom. You having to hold him. Most don't hold their children, while others do. It is to ensure the son is strong warrior." he said.

"I will hold him until I can't because he is too big." you said.

"I figured. I know human traditions. You hold him, feed him and love him. More than yautja does."

"He is beautiful." you said looking down at your sleeping child.

"He has your eyes. Human DNA inside him, but Yautja DNA more permanent, it is why he looks more like me."

"I don't mind. As long as he is healthy." upon hearing you say that, he tightened his grip around you a little bit.

"I'm proud." 

"You should be, you have a son."

"No, proud of you. Human gave birth to Yautja, strong one."

"I had good DNA to mix with mine, you said smiling up at him."

He soon let you lay back as you slowly fell asleep. You placed your baby back into his crib before moving back to your favourite position, being the little spoon as his huge body wrapped around you like a second blanket.

This was your life know, with your mate and son.

And you wouldn't change it for a thing.

After all, this is all you ever wanted.

Part 3 

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~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

DO NOT STEAL, PLAGIARIZE, REPOST OR TRANSLATE ANY OF MY WORKS  

[the-writing-goblin]

We know that canonically, by the Third Age, there mortal stories about Galadriel, telling of the creepy elf-sorceress whose powers are unknown and undefined. That those who enter her woods do not leave again the same.

Personally, I suspect elves have the same ideas, they're just not stupid enough to say them out loud because she might hear. Yes they're currently in Imladris and she's in Lothlorien, what's your point?

Like, I really feel like it's important to note how utterly alien Galadriel would be and feel to pretty much everyone else by the Third Age. Even other elves.

The most obvious difference would be that she's looked upon the trees, but I also think the fact that she was born and raised in Aman is... actually probably a big deal?

Like: she grew up near the only direct source of light in her time, and much of the food she was eating was probably blessed by Yavanna, Vanna, or one of their Maia. The men in her family, Turgon and Maedhros most famously, are notably tall. Galadriel herself is described as 'no less tall than' her husband Celeborn in lord of the rings. I take this to mean they're the same height but... the wording doesn't technically rule out her being taller? She could be a damn giant.

And she's the only elf who we know looks visibly Vanya. Elrond, the only other named elf who we know had Vanya heritage seems to take after his mother (probably, at least in coloring). Even if there are other elves with some Vanya looks kicking around by the time the fellowship roles up pretty much all of the elves any of them would have seen would be some combination of Sinda, Silvan, and Noldor. We know that canonically her coloring is quite different from these, with her hair being closer to Vanya gold than Teleri or Noldor colorings. It's not clear exactly how different these groups are in appearence, but it could be dramatic. Certainly, her hair is... ya know... kinda a big deal. In the books. Just a bit.

Basically, she is tall, stunningly gorgeous in a deeply unfamiliar way, powerfully magical in a way no one else in middle earth is and her eyes are fucking glowing because of the treelight. She learned magic from the Middle Earth equivalent of a minor god and she's at least somewhat telepathic.

Everyone with any sense is afraid of this woman.

[extasiswings]

Okay, SO! In the category of "I think it's possible that Eddie has a brain tumor/is sick in some way":

Eddie is acting weird. Eddie has been acting weird from the beginning of the season, and I know there has been discourse about "it's just that we haven't seen him so happy before" but I respectfully submit that multiple things can be true at the same time. Eddie can be happy AND it can be out of character for him to impulsively drop everything to take a helicopter ride with his new friend he met two seconds ago to see a fight in Vegas (the last time we saw Eddie be truly impulsive I'd argue was S3, buying a truck while in the midst of a serious crisis). Eddie can be happy AND it can be out of character for him to ask his girlfriend of five minutes to move in (and I recognize that we were given an explanation from Eddie in the episode, but Eddie is an unreliable narrator and his explanation also doesn't totally square with what we've seen previously - him rushing introducing her to Christopher tracks, him jumping into moving her into his house without knowing basic information about her life does not).

Then there are the Eddie-coded calls. The guy with the alien hand who is all about rigid self control and being the master of yourself - his body turning against him not because the control failed but because of a blood clot in his brain. And now the guy with encephalitis (the same condition that ultimately caused Chim to hallucinate dead people), who has amnesia and has forgotten the marriage that ended in divorce but recalls the happy time before that when his wife was just his fiancee, the guy who was experiencing chest pains that he thought was a heart attack only for Chim to say he was having a panic attack. They had Eddie be so open about his own experiences with panic attacks and coping mechanisms in 7x01 for a reason - he's genuinely doing better with his own mental health and isn't ashamed or afraid of talking about his mental health struggles. But looking at these two calls, the underlying reason for the call (alien hand, amnesiac/presumed stalker in vent) theoretically could have had mental health explanations, but instead both resulted from physical ailments in the brain. [Tangent: I also think there's something really interesting in the potential callback to S5 and the way Eddie and Maddie were sort of mirrors - Eddie with a seemingly physical problem that was caused by a mental health issue, Maddie with a seemingly mental health issue that turned out to at least in part be the result of a physical problem]

Then there is whatever they're doing with ghosts. Shannon's ghost has lingered over the narrative and was actively put on screen in 7x01. For Chim in 7x06, the ghosts were hallucinations because there was something wrong with his brain. For Bobby, I'm guessing his arc with the burn unit nurse from his past will be more of a metaphorical haunting, bringing up any number of old ghosts (but I'm also going to guess his wife will be one). For Eddie...unclear. Ryan was filming with Devin (ostensibly for 7x09 but if they're doing anything with Shanon's ghost I'd be shocked if it wasn't introduced in 7x07, "Ghost of a Second Chance"), but she didn't exactly look like Shannon. Is she supposed to be Shannon? A dream or hallucination of a different or older her? Is she a real woman who just happens to look like her? If Eddie is hallucinating, then something is clearly very wrong. If it's a random woman and he's, idk, pursuing her in some way because he's drawn to her/the fact that she looks like his dead wife, that's still another point in the "Eddie is acting weird" column (because Eddie is a bad boyfriend and wasn't the greatest husband, but what he has never been is a cheater, even when he and Shannon were separated).

And then of course there's the will of it all. The will that Buck and Eddie haven't talked about since the shooting. Now, it's no secret I love the potential of a trapped dads experience circling back to the will, but I also think there is an argument to be made for a callback to "You're the guy who likes to fix things, maybe this isn't something you can fix." Because usually, when Eddie is in danger, Buck can do something about it, take some actionable step even if a futile one - he can dig through mud, he can drag Eddie's body out of the line of fire and into an ambulance and keep him alive. And for someone who, I would guess, still thinks of himself and the will as a backup plan/contingency, who if put in a trapped dads situation may not be able to stop himself from trying to save Eddie or, if necessary, sacrificing himself to do so, because in his mind, Eddie is Christopher's dad/who Christopher needs most, it is deeply compelling to imagine what happens if Eddie is in danger from something Buck can't fix, can't fight, can't save him from. And Eddie being sick in some capacity does that.

Anyway...I just think it would be Neat.

[devilfic]

omg we need more of the honeymoon shot bruce and reader,, maybe a one bed trope if it’s not too much to ask no pressure obv!!<3

❝honeymoon❞

II. marriage bed.

parts: previously / next plot: the in-laws are in town. pairing: battinson!bruce wayne x gn!reader. cw: arranged marriage, friends to enemies to (fake) lovers, implied history between reader and bruce, only one bed trope. words: 1.6k.

"I'm sorry" feels numb to say at this point. You still say it, standing at the foot of what should have been your marriage bed. It's been a long night and you'd wrung your hands of dish soap until your family practically barked at you to get to bed, to get back to your husband.

You can still hear them, cackling downstairs in the living room while your nieces and nephews tumble through the hallway. It must feel alien to have your childhood home, long devoid of familial joy, be suddenly bursting full of it. And have none of it mean anything to you.

Bruce stands shoulder to shoulder with you for a few more beats. Then he walks to the door, and you watch him twist the lock with a firm click. Your heart picks up a bit.

His steps are muted on the carpet and you take in his shoulders, the rolling hills of muscles in his back, and the pants that cling to the divots of his hip bones. The black cashmere is a gift from your mother, something preferable to his "ratty" sweats. He didn't like these very much.

Since you'd started living here, you caught glimpses of him like this. A heavy shadow of a man skulking in the darkness, waiting for you to leave for work before revealing himself. Rarely would you find yourselves crossing paths in the kitchen or catching eyes in the living room. And with each fleeting glance, he would escape elsewhere, receding into the tower the way a frightened cat might hide from strangers. Intruders. Funnily enough, you found avoiding eye contact helped that.

But now there was nowhere to run. Your family was here for the holidays and they were in every room. Eyes everywhere.

"Do you need to work tonight?" You'd started calling it that: "work". It made sense around the family (not so much your mother), and it didn't put him on edge when you skirted around the "B" word. "I can help you get downstairs."

He's half-turned to you, waiting on his side of the bed, so you can see the way his face scrunches up at a thought, "Gordon... told me to take time off. For family."

You snort, "You told him the in-laws were in town?"

"Yes."

You blink, "Oh."

Bruce had told you that between you and Alfred, no one else knew who Batman was. The lieutenant, trusted friend and ally as he were, had yet to join the ranks of your prestigious little club. It felt wrong to be in it when he wasn't; you'd forced yourself into it, and Bruce didn't even trust you.

You round the bed opposite to Bruce, and staring across it at him felt like staring across an ocean—he was so far away. You wondered how many people had shared this bed with him. How many he trusted as little as you.

You understand that the Bruce you remember was still a boy, grieving much differently than he is now, and had liked you just a little bit more.

You're the first to draw back the covers.

Bruce watches you settle in before following suit, reluctant, as if he were still wondering about the cons of sleeping in his car tonight. The weight of the bed dramatically shifts and you glide against the silk to his side when he lays down, your hand going for his upper arm to steady yourself. He jolts at the contact, staring you down like a deer in headlights.

Your second sorry of the night spills from your lips, and you squirm away from the warmth of his side and back to the edge of the bed.

You both lay like that for a while, side by side, neither of you particularly comfortable.

"Why didn't you say no?"

His question rocks the stillness in the air. You almost jolt. You turn your head and ask, as casually as you are able, "Say no to what?"

"The marriage."

Ah. "You've met my mother. It's hard to say no to her. Isn't that why you're in this situation in the first place?"

He remains looking up at the ceiling, but you see his jaw constrict, "The you I knew had a backbone."

He means it to hurt. Reminders of your youth together had not softened with time, it seemed, even if he treated you like a distant memory. You don't muster up the courage to bite back at him. Instead, you tuck your tail and keep the mist from gathering in your eyes, "...Yeah."

He doesn't seem to have expected that response. He finally turns his head to look at you, visibly confused. For a few moments, the two of you just stare at each other. Him, analyzing. You... mourning. "Is this what you wanted?"

It's becoming harder to hold back tears, "Not this. Not with her pulling all the strings. Regardless of what you think about me, or my mother, or my family, I didn't want any of this. I don't... want to be your enemy, Bruce."

You want so badly for him to believe you. You've never wanted anything more than for him to see you honestly, transparently, except perhaps to see him the same. To not have to fight.

He's about to say something when the doorknob wriggles, followed by a tentative knock. The two of you sit up and listen for who could be at the door, until a small voice calls your name through the wood, "My niece." You say, rigid. "She must be lost." You go to stand but to your surprise, Bruce is already at the door letting her in.

She stands at just about his knee, blanket clutched in her chubby arms and mouth hidden by the purple fleece. She has to turn her head all the way up to look him in the eyes, "Uncle Bruce," she says through a lisp, "where's the bathroom?"

You can't fully see Bruce's reaction from the bed. From the side, you watch his shoulders sag and his cheek rise in what you think is... a smile.

Very slowly, he comes to a crouch in front of her, "The bathroom?" He asks. She nods an affirmative. "Why didn't you ask Grandpa Alfred? He knows where everything is."

Her eyes dart to the side, rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet, "...Grandpa Alfred is scary."

Bruce laughs, actually laughs. He hasn't laughed around you. Hasn't managed more than a smile today, and only to placate your mother. He's warmer too, more open. You watch him. Mesmerized. "He is a little scary, isn't he? But I promise, he's really nice if you get to know him." Your niece doesn't seem so convinced. A moment passes as Bruce thinks of what to say, "How about I come with you to go ask him?"

Her eyes light up, "Really?"

"Really."

Bruce holds out his arms to her, and though she's reluctant, you watch her tumble into them with arms thrown around his neck. He hops back to his feet with her perched on his hip like she weighs nothing—and she probably does, to him—and asks her in a hushed voice if she's holding on tight.

Her little head turns to look at you over his shoulder and he follows, his smile weakening some.

You almost ask if she'd like you to come with, but think better of it. In the time it would take Bruce to complete this task, you could try to fall asleep. Maybe then it'd be easier on him to share the bed with you, "Go with Uncle Bruce. Maybe Grandpa Alfred will show you the fancy swords if you're brave enough to ask."

Your niece beams, urging Bruce to take her to him this instant, and they disappear out of sight.

You're half conscious when Bruce returns and shuts the door, but there is no click of the lock to follow after.

With your back turned, all you have to tell you where he is in the room are his small sighs. He's on his side, closer than you expected him to be so quickly, and you curse the carpet that hides his footfalls. You keep your breaths measured, pretending you're fully asleep, and wait for him to climb in.

One knee presses into the mattress, then the other, and you quickly remember the problem with this bed.

He's just laid on his side when you go sliding backwards, feeling your body collide with his chest. You force your eyes to stay closed but you are chilled with mortification. Should you move? Give up the facade of sleep and scramble for the other side of the bed? Would he shove you away?

You wait for his heavy hand to fall on your back, but... nothing. Seconds crawl forward at a snail's pace. You can feel the heat of his hand hovering over your hip where your night shirt had ridden up, but he never touches you. You take slow, deep breaths. You wait for him to wake you, then, if he won't shove you.

But that also never comes. The tips of his fingers lightly brush the skin of your hip, and then disappear. You feel his arm wiggle between the both of you, feel him shift a bit on the mattress, but nothing more. He doesn't push you away. Doesn't call your name. Doesn't shake you until you're forced to crawl to the other side.

He gets comfortable. Stiff, but comfortable, and he doesn't move you. You wonder, as the heat of his chest makes you conscious of your heart beating quicker, if it's too late to crawl back on your own.

You wait for what feels like hours contemplating it. So long, it feels like he might've fallen asleep behind you. So long, that you melt into his side of the mattress. So long, that sleep comes and morning soon after before you could even make up your mind.

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[easays]

In some ways, I wonder if Tula is Brennan's chance to revisit some of the feelings Caramelinda struggled with. Both are women who lost their partner and had to deal with the fallout in ways that asked them to de-prioritize their own feelings and well-being.

At some point for Caramelinda, pushing it down meant trying to love Jet and Ruby in ways that prepared them for the heartbreak and hardness she dealt with without letting them into the hurt yoked around her own neck.

Tula, I think, shows us how kind and gentle and loving that desire to protect can look like before it turns brittle and alienating between parent and child. Caramelinda kept her love for Lazuli buried; Tula is burying her kids in her love for Geoffrey. At the center of both, I think, is a simmering wound and anger.

Caramelinda's was dragged out of her by a greater grief; I can't help but wonder if Tula's, too, will only fully emerge after she loses something more precious than her husband. Or will Lila and Jaysohn lose her and inherit the way she holds her anger under wraps? Will their love of her turn into a memorial clouding the anger underneath until it's too late for them, too?