#also cannot control buffy

[that-bi-bitch-writes]

tell buffy to stop this foolishness !!!#stopracism2k22

this is such a funny interaction

[annyankers]

I’m once again irrationally mad about how people complain about the magic metaphors in buffy work (the whole dark magic=addiction, wicca = gay shit thing).

Like I cannot express how frustrating it is to see people bitching about how things like Dark Willow “don’t make sense” because “magic/Wicca was a originally metaphor for queerness“ or whatever as tho the first two major episodes in the series where magic was used (1x3 “Witch” and 2x8 “Dark Ages” ) weren’t all about the dark/inappropriate/destructive/abusive use of magic.

People loooooooveeeeee Giles’ past as Ripper and delight over things like “Band Candy” where we see him go Full Ripper but cannot for the life of them seem to remember that we first even LEARNED ABOUT THAT PART OF HIM IN DARK AGES WHERE HE TALKED ABOUT BASICALLY MAGICALLY PARTYING SO HARD HIS FRIEND DIED. THIS IS OUR FIRST MAJOR CHARACTER EPISODE THAT’S GOT MAGIC AS A MAIN FOCAL ELEMENT! THIS IS THE ORIGINAL METAPHOR!

The queerness is still kinda baked in there because of the Ethan Of It All but it’s first and foremost a metaphor about like, all the shit that classically leads to substance abuse and the worst outcomes that can come from it. Willow and Tara are an example of the “good” side of magic ( I’ll say Jenny is also in this section but they do so fucking little w/ her technopagan-ness so). They’re also pretty explicitly said to be “Wiccans” which I also have some issues with because of how Wicca is portrayed/talked about in the show (the Silver RavenWolf energy of it all is so galling). But like, that’s literally a whole fucking different subsection/practice of witchcraft/magic. This is like getting mad at water polo for muddling the metaphor of jet skiing. Like yes, they both are water sports but I think you’ll that they’re not the same fucking one and work completely differently.

Magic is not just 1 set of spells and rituals, it’s a multifaceted, multilayered, multi-pathed thing. With Giles we see how it can go Very Wrong and with Willow and Tara in S4-5 we see how it can go Very Right (and how it can be used to help get the Gay in the show around the Fox Censors). Willow increasingly having issues with magic/substance abuse is NOT a mixed metaphor/bad writing/ruining the gay metaphor and implying gays are bad. It’s USING THE OTHER ALREADY ESTABLISHED MAGIC METAPHOR AS PART OF HER CHARACTER ARC. WILLOW CAN BE QUEER AND ALSO HAVE A SUBSTANCE ABUSE ISSUE! GILES ARGUABLY DID IT FIRST ANYWAY (again, the Ethan Of It All)!

Willow has ALWAYS been insecure, a lil bit of a control freak, someone who wants to be HER REAL SELF and also someone TOTALLY DIFFERENT. Like she wants to be Willow but only if it’s a Willow who’s better/cooler/stronger/prettier etc. Someone who’s not the “pathetic loser” she still sees herself as even in season 6 and hasn’t totally shaken in season 7. These desires both to feel more In Control/Better and Not Yourself are classic reasons people will turn to substance abuse. For Willow is it MUCH easier to do a wizard spell to “fix” a problem than it is to like, fucking confront her issues of self-loathing and self-worth and like.... go to therapy. And that’s what gets her in trouble just like it has for so many others before her. Like in many ways Dark/Addict Willow is like seeing Giles’ Ripper Era live and on screen plus maybe a lil bit on steroids.

Magic can be used as part of more than 1 metaphor and the substance abuse metaphor came first. Stop pretending like it never existed in the show until season 6.

[midnight-mismanagement]

I know this has been talked about a lot but just been thinking about how Something Blue is like a fanfic writer going “haha what if I shipped this wouldn’t it be wild jk” and then it spiralling wildly out of control. It is a crack ship eventually treated seriously and I find that hilarious. 

And also just, how does the Will Be Done spell even work. The parameters. I’ve been thinking about it, and Willow only said “why doesn’t she just go marry him” (or something to that effect) not “why don’t they fall hopelessly in love with each other and get married.” They could’ve easily had it where they both maintained their enemy dynamic and been very confused and angry the entire way to getting a marriage certificate, and I think it’s that the concept of marriage and the action of it have to align with the person’s internal logic in some way. Buffy does not believe she will get married, she is the Slayer, she can fantasize but she will most likely die young. So marriage in her head is a Big Fantasy Thing that should only be done if you are Truly In Love and it must require all the wedding planning and the beautiful white dress and all the bells and whistles because the improbability of it happening just fuels the abstract fantasy. She comes across as So Happy and it’s the happiest she’s ever been because on some level she cannot imagine herself being that happy and she cannot imagine a wedding without being that happy, so it’s designated into this little Buffy Fantasy Box Scenario. 

And Spike has loved Dru for a hundred years and never needed a wedding or marriage because that is a Human Concept that he probably also fantasized about as a human but hasn’t really thought of since (and has probably had to abandon). Their love doesn’t need a silly paper, they are having a wedding everyday, they celebrate their love everyday, it’s about the constant displays of devotion. So in this made up marriage scenario, Spike can only imagine himself as initiating a proposal if he is In Love and Devoted (and probably secretly wishes he and Dru did have some kind of wedding but would never admit that. Thinking about Angelus telling him: “you can take what you want, have what you want, but nothing is yours. Not even her [dru].”)

Basically, Spike and Buffy as they are would only consider marriage if they are truly in love with someone and they both have a little tentatively abstract Wedding Fantasy that lives rent free in their brains that they would never admit exists there in the first place. And it’s why both of them act like a CoupleTM and do all the Wedding Planning ThingsTM because that’s what a wedding should be, right? 

They shouldn’t be a Thing [couple/in love] and yet they are meeting each other halfway in indulging this Thing [wedding/marriage/”normal” life] that can never be.  

[brsb4hls]

Ok, ok, ok, Loki: moral of the story.

I slept, I rewatched, I'm trying to be coherent.

So Sylvie. I know people love to hate her, but she's obviously integral to the plot, or they would have kept her at McD's in the second ep. Now what does she do?

She challenges Loki's viewpoint. There's a constant push and pull about what's right and wrong between them. And in 2x5 we've established that Loki simply just does not want to be alone.

But what about people's choices?

The only constant about the tva the narrative has established is pruning=bad.

Everyone was on branched time lines in 2x5, so when the tva took them before the branch could develop, everything around them would be reset.

So what about Mobius' kids? The show really invested some time in that. Mobius is trying, but struggling. He is in constant sale mode, desperate (even trying to sell to B15 later on). So he's short on cash.

And his kids need guidance. They call him at work and left to their own devices, they set shit on fire.

Mobius looks exhausted (the stubble etc). He's very sceptical and even afraid, when Loki shows up and finally agrees to come with him, because Loki says his boys are in danger.

If that Mobius stays at the tva, what about his boys? Why create such a huge emotional scene for nothing?

Also, if the time line hadn't branched (original version, where Mobius got taken at the nexus event), his boys would be erased.

Now from a Rick Sanchez pov that shit doesn't matter, but narrativly, there has to be something to it.

Sylvie challenges Loki by pointing out the branched timelines are what should have happened in the first place hadn't the tva not interfered.

They go back and forth about choices.

Point is, the choices were already made and lead to nexus events and branches and then the tva took those choices away. So Loki dragging everyone back cannot be good, right?

Sylvie wont interfere, even if she gets Loki on an emotional level, because it's not her place.

And Loki realizes that when he says everyone should go home after Sylvie didn't come with him.

Sylvie does interfere, when the branches are threatened, they dissolve, so she helps. She is very much about free will, but she is not careless. She always helped when needed.

BUT SHE DOES NOT WANT TO CONTROL.

Loki does!

So where will that lead? Loki will have to jump back and stabelize all the branches.

Victor probs wont succeed and Loki will do it himself.

But what then?

The morally correct thing would be to let all branches exist with the variants on them. (Especially if we take the soundbits into account when Loki is deliberatly slipping, B15 saying she was happy where she was, Mobius wanting to get back to his boys...)

If Loki gets powerful enough to safe and control time lines (the green lines in the trailer) he doesn't need the tva. He can keep an eye on Kang himself.

But he wants to keep his friends for selfish reasons.

So what will it be?

Also the end will be exactly what HWR predicted. Plus the tva has a fail safe (shown on the screen before spaghettification).

So does the tva have to keep existing? If so, to what extend?

Narrativly Loki would have to put everyone on their respective lines and sit his arse down at the citadel, making sure shit doesn't go sideways. Powerwise that would be cool, he would also be a true hero, but isolated again, after he just acknowledged he needs connections.

Side note: notice how Sylvie makes those connections? Everyone knows her by name. She's a regular at the bar and the record shop. She built herself a life, wrote her own story and encourages Loki to do the same.

So the 'happy ending' would be him saving everyone, and then building himself a life outside of tve tva (since that's an artificial place and his 'friends' there aren't themselves).

But that still leaves the treat of Kangs.

So how do we solve that moral dilemma?

To say it with Buffy:

WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?

[sammygender]

final s9 thoughts

CONS

kevin fucking died

this show is allergic to making sense. first of all metatrons evil because he kicked the angels out of heaven. ok. fair enough i guess. now he wants the angels back in heaven and is helping them get there but hes still evil and needs to be stopped? whats he doing that needs to be stopped? like i understand you guys dont like him but at the end of the day hes essentially going Oops my bad... and going back on his actions but this needs to be stopped??? Okay NOW apparently metatron fancies himself as god/gabriel/chuck/andrew from buffy the vampire slayer and is obsessed with pop culture and wants to be god (this is a fun development) so this needs to be stopped. sure i guess. now hes committing the evil act of healing people lots and declaring himself the new god (yes this is what cas did but honestly it was so much cooler when cas did it.....not being sarcastic....it was....). ok i guess that works out. fun guy. but dear god did his character motivations switch up

jesus christ sam cannot catch a break

like seriously. and hes been so worn down by it all. i feel so awful for him its actually fucking insane no one has suffered more than him

dean intensifies from being intensely jealous controlling and possessive in s8 into full gaslight gatekeep girlboss mode. at the start i was kinda going Well this is fucking AWFUL and evil and traumatic for sam but i would've probably done the same thing if it were me. but then the further in the season the worse he gets as well. once the gaslighting is over he moves onto just getting more and more aggressive and controlling. some of it is moc but some of it isnt <3

PROS

all of the above are also pros except for the killing kevin. what the hell. he was my favourite character. also except for the fact that the show mostly ignores sam's depth of trauma

i like watching dean get worse because i enjoy suffering and emotional devastation and should have sam winchester taken away from me by cps (character protective services)

s4 parallels are so cool. i cheered when they locked dean in the panic room type thing basement whatever. DESERVED!!!!!

MARK OF CAIN IS SICK SORRY. very little of it makes a modicum of sense but like ultimately i dont care. yesssss dean get worse turn into your abusive father!!!

cas :) he had so many eras and i loved them all

unfortunately i am not immune to Crowley. awesome character. so excited for him and deans summer of love

more charlie? i dont remember how much charlie was this season and how much was s8. but i love her

the shows getting self-aware and self-referencial in a way that only shows this long running can do and im eating it up. sorry.

[hold-him-down]

13, 16 and 20 for the whump blog ask game please.

~💛

from this ask game

13. Have you ever felt insecure because you enjoy whump? How did you overcome that insecurity

I used to keep it fairly locked up, but over the last like 10 or so years have been more open about my appreciation for the art of hurt/comfort with people I'm close with. The only times I feel insecure about it are when my close friends or family tease me, especially those who don't share the appreciation for it that I have. One of my best friends will sometimes pick on me for it, or like... okay, so I saw the outsiders on the broadway a couple weeks back for the first time and my sister was like, 'i knew as soon as the rumble happened you'd be back to this show 100 times,' and while not untrue, sometimes getting teased like that makes me feel a bit insecure, but I also was blessed with social anxiety (stars emoji) so I kind of chalk it up to a combo of those things. I don't know that I do overcome the insecurity, I SIMPLY CANNOT CONTROL MY LOVE OF THE WHUMP GENRE. Also sometimes when I write something particularly graphic or my page is trending heavily in like the uber dark shit, I get a little in my head.

16. Do you have any whump media recommendations (whump blogs, books, movies, etc.)?

Yes! Throughout the blog I've gone through some of my top recommendations, but here are a few of them:

books: all for the game, captive prince, a little life

movies: life like, good boy, the island

tv shows: teen wolf, roswell (old series, not new), buffy

plays/musicals: the inheritance, the outsiders

20. How are you doing today, buddy?

cannot complain at all! it was my last day of work and i'm off through the end of next week because tomorrow i go to europe and i am EXCITED. so sleepy though :)

[mothmans-wedding-photographer]

Mothman's Buffy rewatch: Season 3, episodes 3 and 4, "Beauty and the Beasts" and "Homecoming"

Beauty and the Beasts

Lmao is she reading to Oz

Xander's turn!!

I do not understand the Monty reference

Xander don't fall asleep on the job (this reminds me of Mike from getting FNAF movie)

I love when the intro spoils part of the episode (I just saw Xander getting attacked by werewolf Oz)

Yo Scott!!

Damn did Oz kill a man

Angry Giles

Poor Oz :( it must feel awful

Who is this guidance counselor man

"You can fight demons" I think she knows that

Oz is so straightforward I love him

What the fuck wild animal Angel

My dad called him Angle

Is the theme of this episode feral boyfriends

Ouchie Faith's fist probably hurts

Ok a hell torture dimension is a bit much even for someone who doesn't like Angel

Aw Scott is kind of sweet. I don't think he's interesting enough to date Buffy long term but he's fine

IM SORRY ITS SO SILLY WATCHING THIS GROWN ASS MAN ACTING LIKE AN ANIMAL

Buffy pouring his heart out to a corpse. Rough 😭

Is the boyfriend on magic drugs?

Ah what the hell what's his face doing

Oh shit I feel so bad for Debbie she's in an abusive relationship and she can't leave

Allegory for boyfriends who get violent when drunk huh

"You know you shouldn't make me mad" walk into traffic

Oh now she has to comfort HIM. Kill this man with hammers ❗️❗️🗣🗣

Oz is clear yippee

Omg jazz band mentioned!!! (I used to do jazz band)

Oz should rip him apart fr

"He does love me" :(

His werewolf form reminds me more of a monkey

Got Giles in the behind

I hope this man dies horribly (I don't remember his name)

Did Debbie die? If she did ill cry she didn't deserve that abuse only to not be freed

WILLOW GRABBED HIM BY HIS PATHETIC LITTLE TAIL IM CRYING

Got all the monster boyfriends fighting each other lmao

Angel's back yippee(?)

Cordelia believing the birth control story I'm crying

Buffy poet???

I googled it Debbie did die :(

Homecoming

I like Buffy's hair

Oh she gave Angel a shirt! He's still not buttoning it up but progress

"They wouldn't understand that you're better" why not? Why wouldn't they that's not a wild thing to believe, Buffy already told them that Angelus was back to Angel before he got stabbed 😭😭

Angel whipping his head around when he finds out she's dating someone

SCOTT BROKE UP

Who are these people watching Buffy

Is this the Slayerfest episode?

This guy is obsessed with cleanliness but he is also very threatening. I do not care for this representation

I love the picture montages it really shows off their personalities

Xander is definitely giving lesbian fetishier with that comment. That being said, Fuffy is a good ship

Simply take each other to the dance Buffy and Faith

Ouch her favourite teacher doesn't recognize her

Awaken the prom queen within ❗️❗️

Silly yellow guy with spikes like a stegosaurus

I thought the cowboy vampires died is this a new one

WILLOWS DRESS IS SO PRETTY

I thought Willow and Xander were going to kiss for a sec please don't do that

NOOO THEY DID KISS FUCK

Willow you're better than this (Xander you're not)

Buffy gets abandoned

What the hell did he get pull out of his arms

"I'm a rabid dog who should be shot" 😭

Buffy guilt tripping Willow I'm crying

Dad says there was a deep cut star trek reference in this episode but I don't get it

Cordelia what the fuck "I have two parents, unlike some people"

DONT FUCKING KISS AGAIN IM KILLING YOU WITH HAMMERS

They put Buffy and Cordelia in time out

The car driver putting in earbuds. Unsafe driving he's gonna crash

Ouch singing the song he wrote for Willow right after she cheated on him

She threw the fucking bear trap at him I'm gonna cry

Oh my gosh Faith fucking over Scott to get revenge for Buffy I love her

Willow I love you but I cannot defend the cheating you need to fess up to Oz

"He grows on you like a chia pet"

Buffy opening her heart I hope she gets prom queen. It makes sense she'd feel that way since she's likely to die young

"Cordelia, the spatula"

Rip that yellow bastard

I was wondering how those two vampires got invited in and then I remembered it's a public school

THEY KILLED HIS WIFE IN FRONT OF HIM SJDBDJ

Cordelia bullying the vampire I'm crying

Why did they let him live

They got trackered rip bozo

Trick guy gets hired by the mayor

Oh it's both of them

NEVERMIND ITS TWO RANDOMS I'M CRYING

[rahirah]

Smashed Review

So I was going through a bunch of ancient zip files on my hard drive, and I found the review of “Smashed” that I wrote immediately after it aired.  I have to say that it holds up surprisingly well, probably because I’m inherently pessimistic.  Have an historical document:

I am moved to write an actual review.  Yay, me.

In this week's episode of BtVS, Smashed, everyone's craving something, and almost everyone is lying to themselves about it.

Willow's craving surcease from heartbreak.  Despite the front she puts on for her friends, she is deeply depressed about Tara's departure, but refuses to acknowledge Tara's reasons for doing so.  She describes their fight to the others as a minor misunderstanding, oblivious to their unease as she gets deeper and deeper into the magic hole.

Amy's craving a simpler life.  She can't deal with the three-year lapse of time since she was last human.  She's shell-shocked by the changes in the world and doesn't want to see her father, hinting that he didn't know that she'd taken up magic.  Given that her father divorced her mother over Catherine Madison's use of magic, Amy's fears that having to explain the reason for her disappearance to him will end badly aren't trivial ones.

Buffy's craving Spike's hot, tight little body, and possibly more, and the implications of her desire terrify her.  She cannot bear to admit it, to herself or to Spike.  She spends the episode denying her attraction to him and desperately trying to push him away, to hurt him so badly that he leaves before he can hurt her.

Spike's craving Buffy's respect.  Driven to distraction by her alternating affection and disgust, after seven episodes of mostly exemplary behavior, Spike finally snaps and reverts (or tries to revert) to the Big Bad, spurred on by his apparent discovery that the chip no longer functions.

Tara acts as the sole real adult in this episode.  She is still drawn to Willow, and acknowledges as much, while realizing that for her own good she can't give in to her craving.  She also makes an effort to make Dawn feel better, making her the only person in the episode willing to put her own pain aside for someone else's sake.

Willow and Amy drown their sorrows in a binge of irresponsible spellcasting at the Bronze before heading out for bigger and better things.  When one contrasts Spike's behavior with Willow's in this same episode, it's difficult to see much moral difference between them.  Both are rejected by the woman they love.  Both act out their hurt and anger on others.  In both cases, no one ended up hurt, but both cases could equally well have ended in tragedy.

The episode draws several parallels between Buffy's attraction to Spike and Willow's out-of-control use of magic.  Just as Willow refuses to take responsibility for Tara's leaving her, Buffy refuses to take responsibility for her actions in initiating the kissing with Spike, blaming it all on spells or depression over Giles's departure.  During the conversation in the Magic Box, Buffy is disturbed by Anya's assertion that the responsible, 'good' people are the most dangerous when they finally go bad.  She is unwilling to believe that Willow is dangerous, and denies that 'everybody' can be seduced.  She is obviously worried about the similarities between Willow and herself, two 'good girls' who have gotten a taste of something powerful, seductive and possibly dangerous.

We are meant to draw the conclusion that Buffy is addicted to Spike, and that this is as undesirable a condition as Willow's magic abuse.  However, it's not at all clear that it's Buffy who's the worst off in their liasion. Compare the Spike of "Bargaining" to the Spike of "Smashed."  It's not a pretty picture.  In "Bargaining" Spike had a good working relationship with the Scoobies, a good family relationship with Dawn, and was coping with existence reasonably well.  He was still in mourning for Buffy, but by no means incapacitated with grief, and was doing something productive with his unlife.

Enter Resurrected!Buffy, and seven eps later, Spike is isolated from everyone except Buffy, due to his anger at being left out of the loop regarding her resurrection and Buffy's entrusting him with her secret.  Spike's words to Buffy in the teaser fit him far better than they fit her; she still has family and friends she can turn to if she chooses to do so; Spike has no one and nothing left.  He's given up all his alliances, human and demon both, for her sake.  There's too much simmering passion between them for them to be just friends, but Buffy refuses to let them be anything else.  Although Buffy repeatedly repulses him, sometimes with behavior which can only be described as gratuitously cruel, Spike never once considers leaving.  She is his addiction, as much or more than he is hers.

When Spike accidentally discovers that he can hit Buffy without pain, he believes that the chip has malfunctioned.  The solution to his problem is obvious: when he was bad, Buffy might have hated him, but she respected him. Spike can endure, just barely, without Buffy's love, but he can't bear her lack of respect.  Spike goes out and stalks a woman, then treats his prospective dinner to a rant about how Buffy takes him for granted.  His victim tells him she's sure he's not evil.  Spike denies it, stating that he's evil, and dangerous, and hasn't forgotten how to be a killer.

Spike's motivations in this scene are, as usual, opaque and open to multiple interpretations.  After weeks of being the ball in Buffy's game of Kiss/Kick The Spike, and years of feeling ineffectual and powerless due to the chip, he's getting an undeniable rush at having, as he thinks, the power of life and death over mere mortals again.  At the same time, his speech to the woman he tries to bite makes it clear that far from chowing down on the nearest warm neck because that's what vampires do, his attack is All About Buffy, a desperate attempt to prove to her that he's someone who cannot be ignored or used at her whim.  The woman's attempt to convince Spike that he's not evil can be seen as an indication that he isn't, really, or, in view of the fact that Spike does attempt to bite her, a jab at the gullibility of those who believe him capable of real reform.  In the end Spike bites, or tries to, but he must work himself up to it, and his speech about how evil he is sounds as if he's trying to convince himself as much as anyone else.  It's worth noting that in this scene, and no other, Spike's hair is mussed up, which usually indicates emotional vulnerability on his part.

The scene is both encouraging and discouraging in terms of Spike's personal growth.  Encouraging because Spike is clearly not forced into biting the woman because of his vampire nature; he does it purely out of hurt, anger, and spite at Buffy, and must work himself up to it even so.  This means that in other circumstances it's possible for him to choose differently. Discouraging as it demonstrates that Spike has, as yet, no concern for people outside his personal circle.  As in the Bronze scene in "Crush," the fact that he hesitated at all is worth noting, but I have little doubt that had the chip really been on the fritz he would have killed the woman--perhaps with regret at severing all ties with the human world, but she'd be no less dead for that.  Getting through to Buffy is more important to him than anything else.

And it is all about getting through to Buffy.  When his biting attempt fails and Warren confirms that the chip is still working, Spike is not disappointed in the slightest.  In fact, he appears pleased.  He doesn't make any attempt to have Warren disable the chip, and doesn't even seem to consider the possibility, though Warren expresses interest in how it works.  Spike doesn't care about regaining his ability to kill per se; the attack on the woman was only a device to get through to Buffy, and now he has a new angle.  If the chip is functioning, and yet he can still hit Buffy, then Buffy, who called him a thing, is now a thing herself, something other than human, something, at last, on his level.

Spike still loves Buffy, but at this point he's given up on winning her love by rising to her level.  With good reason; Buffy cannot admit that he's capable of being on her level, because that would make him too much of an emotional threat.  The greater her attraction to him is, the more strenuously Buffy must tell herself, and him, that Spike is a non-person, a thing, nothing she could possibly relate to on an I-Thou basis.  She cannot deal with the change in their relationship even though she's the one who's initiated it.  She wants Spike's emotional and physical support, but she's unwilling or unable to give him anything at all in return.  Buffy is using him, whether she intends to do so or not.

In order to reach Buffy, Spike must break through her walls, tear down the pedestal both of them have placed her on so they can finally see eye to eye. He doesn't intend to hurt her--much--but he's more than willing to take and dish out pain if necessary.  Buffy's post-resurrection difference, whatever it turns out to be, has finally given him physical parity; while she's still stronger than he is, she can no longer beat him up at will.  Physical parity is the first step to emotional parity; now that Spike can fight back again, Buffy can no longer dismiss or ignore his attempts to communicate by punching him and walking off.

Buffy doesn't want to believe that she came back as something other than human, refuses to believe Spike when he tells her that's the reason he's able to hit back now, and attacks him in a fury, trying to get him to take the awful truth back.  Buffy taunts Spike that he fits into neither the human nor the demon world and accuses him of loving not her, but the fact that she can beat him up.  Spike's final dig at Buffy is a little strange: he tells her not that no one loves her (which would be obviously untrue; even as they fight, he tells her that he loves her) but that she has no one to love.

And this is the crux of Buffy's problem: wrapped up in her own pain, she has no love to give anyone else--not Spike, not Dawn, not Willow, not even herself.  There's no way that Buffy's pain is going to magically go away; it's real, and it's going to take a long time to deal with.  Her spirit guide told her last season that she had the power to forge love out of pain, and this is what she must learn do in order to heal.  When Buffy claims Spike has come nowhere near hurting her, and he asks if she's afraid to give him the chance, it's very clear that they're not talking about physical pain.

In Smashed Buffy finally gives in to her physical desire for Spike, but she's still denying any possibility of an emotional connection.  That there is an emotional connection there can be little doubt; if Buffy truly felt nothing but lust for him, she wouldn't be so completely terrified of admitting it. It's the emotional consequences of loving yet another person who may betray or abandon her that she fears.

Again, the final scene is open to multiple interpretations.  Buffy and Spike's battle is savage foreplay, not a serious attempt to incapacitate one another.  (Note the complete lack of the fancy moves both of them showed off in the fight scenes in Tabula Rasa.  In Smashed, their moves are as raw as their emotions.)  They do considerable property damage during the fight, but when the fighting turns to passion, they literally bring the house down. Some reviewers maintain it's a sign that the affair is a doomed one, bound to destroy everything around it.  A more optimistic theory is that the building crumbling around them as they make love signifies that Spike has successfully torn down the walls around Buffy's heart.  And yeah, it is making love, not just shagging, at least for Spike; his expression in those final scenes is that of a demon who's as close to heaven as he's ever going to get.  The two of them maintain eye contact throughout, even after falling through the floor, and it's interesting to note that in this their first encounter, neither one is  on top.'

Sometimes destruction is necessary before you can start to build anew.  But unless Buffy can confront what's been revealed honestly, and admit that she does need to start building, then it won't be long before the two of them destroy one another. They know too much about one another.  Already their complete absorption in their own problems has left Dawn alone and miserable, deserted by her sister and her protector.  Tara can no longer fill the gap all by herself.

As far as the Spike-redemption front goes, at this point it's going to be all but impossible for Spike to make any further progress without positive reinforcement from someone.  Isolated from everyone except Buffy, who's in no condition to offer help and advice to anyone, much less a conflicted and infatuated vampire, it's hard to see where he's going to get it.  The Scoobs have never been very good about giving a helping hand to people who are trying to reform; just ask Faith.

Unfortunately, the events of "Smashed" may have taught Spike the lesson that in her current condition, being bad is the only way to get Buffy's attention and respect.  (Not to mention major nookie.)  I see more backsliding in his future.  The only bright spot is that Buffy now has proof positive that once able to attack her, Spike did not make any serious attempt to kill her (unless screwing her to death counts).  Buffy doesn't know about the attack on the woman, and if ME's track record for brushing aside the trials and tribulations of the ordinary joes the Scoobs are supposedly in the business of saving holds, she may never find out, but learning that Spike is still willing to attack people isn't likely to make Buffy more amenable to a real relationship with him.

The addiction metaphor is pushed even harder in the previews for next week's show, Wrecked.  Willow, eager for more power, seeks out a warlock who can reportedly increase one's ability to do magic.  Buffy attempts once again to give up Spike cold turkey, while he informs her that it's useless; from now on she'll crave him like he craves blood.  I'm fairly sure that we won't be able to fully comprehend the significance of Smashed until much later; Wrecked is undoubtedly a companion episode along the lines of Surprise/Innocence and Reprise/Epiphany.  Eventually, perhaps, Buffy will realize that some addictions--like those for air, water, and food--are necessary for life.  The need to love and be loved is among those necessary addictions, and whether with Spike or someone else, Buffy's going to have to give in to it or, in an emotional sense, remain forever one of the walking dead.

[dufrau]

I'm in a bit of a buffyverse mood today so: any thoughts on the female characters of both Buffy and Angel? Like, who's your fave, who do you think was underrated, who were the lesbians, how big of a crush do you think Cordelia had on Buffy etc etc that type of thing.

Oh man!

Cordelia is so good on Angel. She was great on Buffy but on Angel she is amazing and I love her so much. I do not think she had a crush on Buffy, I actually think Cordelia is very heterosexual which as you know is rare for me!

Fred was my favorite when I was younger and I still love her and the end of her story destroyed me extremely hard.

Angel was unkind to its women pretty much across the board. I love the show for those characters and also for Angel himself because I like that he is basically just a cringe grampa instead of an edgy sexy vampire? But the show was very mean to them!

Buffy and Anya are my favorites on Buffy.

And I love Faith on both shows.

I loved Willow when I was young. But. I am going to put this next part under a cut because i think this is the only fandom opinion that has actually ended friendships for me 😬

Like I get that it was a very different time in the world and in terms of what we had as representation on tv (basically we just had willow and tara tbh!) but like... i find it very strange the way that relationship has endured as nostalgic/fondly remembered?

If Willow's season 6 storyline happened now she would be immediately recognized as a full on villain. Again i forgive us for the way we rooted for them at the time! But in hindsight?

Tara's backstory is basically being mind controlled and abused by her cult family, and then she gets mind controlled by Glory.

And then when she raises concerns to Willow about her overreaching with her magic, Willow erases her memory. Which is more mind control. She does the exact thing Tara was already upset about but this time aims it at her specifically for the purpose of controlling her, in the same way that she knows Tara has been abused in the past.

Under Your Spell is really hard to watch when you take into account that Tara cannot and would not consent to it if she knew at that point what Willow had done.

And then when Tara DOES find out and points out how fucked up it is, Willow just does it again!

And all this is contrasted with the actual villains of the season whose turn from silly villains into serious villains is when they mind control a girl so she would be agreeable and willing to have sex with them (which is what willow did!) and wind up killing her.

It is very hard to watch these two storylines happening in the same season and see Willow as a redeemable character or this relationship as one that should have survived. Poor Tara, man! She died for this shit???

Anyway. I hate this opinion! i want to love Willow! But I hate her! She's a terrible person! I cant look at Willow/Tara and feel good about it at all! Tara deserved better from the show but she also deserved better than Willow!

[girl4music]

Have I ever written about how much I love the episode ‘Wild At Heart’? I mean in-depth? Comprehensively?

No? Okay, let’s do that. Prepare for a long rant on what is without a doubt, for me, the most compelling and well-written episode of the whole damn show.

And ironically enough Buffy is barely in it…

What stands out to me the most about ‘Wild At Heart’ is the exploration of the motif ‘The Beast’. Now they’ve done this several times before in the 3 previous seasons before it. Season 1’s ‘The Pack’, Season 2’s ‘Innocence’, and of course Season 3’s ‘Beauty And The Beasts’. It’s a recurring idea designed to make you stop and think deeper. And even later than Season 4, some of Spike’s centric episodes also do very well in exploring this motif.

However, what Season 4’s ‘Wild At Heart’ does is shows you something different. You’re now getting to see through the perspective of ‘The Beast’. Oz is ‘The Beast’ in this narrative. Or rather Oz’s werewolf ID is. But the narrative really goes deep in investigating as to whether there are 2 entirely different and separate ID’s fighting for dominance within Oz. Or just 1 ID that is just confused or even brainwashed about his true nature. The episode’s antagonist, Veruca, brings up the point of view that Oz is the werewolf all the time but has just been domesticated, and therefore blindly believes that he is human all the time and just has a condition of which he can keep in control of and sever himself from. Now because Veruca is the antagonist, we’re supposed to just take what she says to him with a grain of salt because she’s only saying it to lure him to her side, to her world, to being a creature of the night like she is. Oz doesn’t want to believe or even accept Veruca’s point of view about how his true nature is the wolf and his humanity is the falsity.

Now before I get into why this episode is fucking fantastic to me as far as what I can learn from it, I want to ask a question: Is Veruca wrong for telling Oz this? Or let’s go even further: Is Veruca evil for trying to convince Oz through selfish methods that he cannot sever himself from the wolf because her point of view is that she and he is actually the wolf full time?

You see, I don’t think she is. In fact that’s what I find most intriguing and compelling about ‘Wild At Heart’. No one is evil. No one is wrong. Every perspective given or that we experience through the characters is a valid perspective worth study and debate. It’s worth considering and opening our minds to the possibility that Veruca might actually be right about Oz, or at least herself. And what truly makes me open my mind to Veruca’s perspective is what Oz does to Veruca at the climax of the episode. He kills her to protect the woman he loves. Willow. He does something he has never vowed to do in order to protect the love of his life. Kill for her. He decides, as the human, to kill Veruca. Sure, the killing itself happens while he is in werewolf form. But to me, that only validates her point of view even further. Because where then does the line between human and werewolf lie? And that’s what Oz learns. It’s devastating but it is a conflict within him that would come up sooner or later even if Veruca didn’t make an appearance. And thus, he has to make the very difficult decision to leave or stay, stating that very same sentiment. Where is the line?

That final interaction and conversation between Oz and Willow - which by the way, Alyson’s acting here is fucking phenomenal. Specifically her tear work is top notch! She fucking kills me when I see her crying through her lines of dialogue in this scene. She’s an amazing performer as far as showing emotional vulnerability whilst in the midst of dialogue goes - But back to the subject before praising Hannigan’s acting abilities. That conversation they have where Oz has made up his mind on leaving without consulting Willow first. It’s easy to see how Oz is selfish for doing this and maybe he is. However, I can completely sympathise with his situation and respect his decision to leave Willow and to leave Sunnydale completely. I’ve actually argued this perspective in response to an earlier post on Tumblr about Angel never staying with Buffy when shit goes down between them and how he is selfish for it but instead used Tara as the example to argue in Angel’s defence. And it didn’t occur to me at the time that Oz was actually the better example because Oz is ‘The Beast’ in the narrative - just like Angel is. Using Tara actually didn’t make all that much sense now that I think about it because it’s the OTHER PERSON that is ‘The Beast’ in the narrative with their situation. It’s Willow. Not Tara. But anyway - the reason to use Tara as the example in coming to Angel’s defence was because I don’t believe it to be selfish. I don’t believe it to be wrong. I don’t believe it to be evil. Either in Angel’s case with him leaving Buffy, in Oz’s case with him leaving Willow, in Xander’s case with him leaving Anya. And especially not in Tara’s case with her leaving Willow. Why? Because commitment and loyalty and even love… I guess, - it’s very difficult to put any of that above the real risk that you might hurt the one you love or anyone innocent for that matter if you stick around them. If you stay with them. If your presence poses a potential threat and danger. And being the one that has to leave in that case is a very complex predicament to be in that cannot be simply put down to selfishness vs selflessness or right vs wrong or good vs evil. There’s so much more information to take into account with being in situations like this, and from the outside-looking-in, it’s just so easy to pick a side to pick on rather than consider the validness of all sides or the perspectives/point-of-views of all the characters and weigh the pros and cons of what matters more at that particular moment in time. Of what prevents the risk.

I guess another reason why I thought it best to use Tara as an example in defending Angel’s choice to leave Buffy and his reasoning for doing so was because she’s a female. Because you see all the other examples I’ve given above are male… and let me just say,… it’s extremely hard for me to argue the ‘selfless’ perspective because it’s always a male that leaves the female ‘for their own good’. It gets into ‘misogyny’ and ‘mansplaining’ and all sorts of irrelevant shit that actually has nothing to do with what’s even going on in the situation in the episode! The gender identity politics that get brought up whenever I attempt to talk about the complex and usually negative events in “BtVS’ when it involves a male character in any capacity leaving a female character are insane to me and the conversation turns into something else entirely and the perspective I’m trying to argue goes places I never intend it to go. I’m talking about the themes, the situations, the experiences, the narratives and my genuine interest in it all. I’m not talking about male vs female. I’m arguing for a side and in defence of a CHARACTER, not a gender! We can certainly talk about why we believe a character is wrong or evil or selfish or questionable… whatever. But as soon as it hits gender identity politics, I’m out! Because that’s just not what I’m trying to get across when arguing the ‘selfless’ perspective. So I chose Tara as the example to avoid all of that. And to be honest, it never occurred to me to choose Oz at all.

But Oz does have a somewhat similar situation to Angel in that he is still a beast and this beast is an alter ego of sorts that is separated from the soul. And in much the same way, his emotions and hormones and feelings are tethered to Willow and his love for her. And at the same time, those same emotions, hormones and feelings are what trigger ‘The Beast’ to come out of its cage. But ‘Wild At Heart’ does make you really question and analyze the point of view that maybe there really isn’t a line between ‘The Beast’ and the soul, the werewolf and the human, the selfless vampire and the selfish monster. Or if there really is… then it’s not a line that can be consciously traversed. It takes immense self-awareness, self-discovery, self-growth, self-discipline to come to stand at that line were it even visibly there to see… and actively choose not to cross it over being shoved right into it due to unforeseen and uncontrollable circumstances or just plain bad luck. I’m not excusing the sinful actions that occur as a result but I am trying to pay more attention with a neutral and unbiased mindset. I am trying to keep an open mind. ‘Wild At Heart’ provokes my thoughts to the point where I am debating in my own head (we INTPs tend to do that a lot) as to whether to agree with Oz or agree with Willow or even agree with Veruca. I can’t make up my own mind. All I know when I watch it is that I cannot fault anyone for what happens in it… and that that’s the reason why I think it’s the most well-written storyline in ‘BtVS’. Because the best written art/entertainment to me does make me question and assess my own thoughts, feelings and opinions constantly on an endless loop. If it doesn’t make me do that - it’s so dull and quite the chore to get through. I find myself waiting for it to end. Not so with material that provokes my thoughts. And much of ‘BtVS’ does, I admit. But ‘Wild At Heart’ is a whole other entity when it comes to that. It’s just got so many layers to it and everything that goes on is high drama but so nuanced and unstated that part of the reason to watch it again and again is just to pick up on detail or insight that I’ve never noticed before. As all of my favourite art/entertainment makes me do.

[annyankers]

also hot take (?): but vampires DO have souls. the creation of a vampire in btvs lore is literally that a demonic essence/spirit/spiritual energy (in this instance a vampiric one and not some other kind of demon) enters a human corpse and parasitically latches on, altering the human corpse to better suit it with an initial burst of spooky evil demon magic (which is part of why i never think any lore that says vampire can't do magic makes sense like, how do you think they even function fam?). it then uses the info and identity of the former inhabitant that's all still locked up in those dead synapses to help it acclimate to the new dimension and build a sense of identity. you can argue that the vampire is not your dead friend but what is a person if not their memories and thoughts? all of which the vampire now shares too. so that's a fun little thing to puzzle on in philosophy class.

vampires in the buffy world are pretty explicitly a manufactured creature built of a demonic essence/entity grafted into a human cadaver which merge to make a new species which is why they're so low on the demon hierarchy. they're the most mongrel-y of all the half-breeds. what is the soul if not a spiritual essence that fuels and motivates the body? the metaphysical component that makes the system complete? what is the vampire of not a perversion of the human condition? does it not then stand that the vampire soul is the twisted mirror of the human one?

the thing is that while this is Kinda Common Sense when you sit down and just look at objectively how the vampire is made it's a dangerous concept in universe and we fall pray to believe the same propaganda built to ensnare our characters.

the slayer was made in almost the exact same process as a vampire only with a living subject-- a demonic essence grafted into a human host. there is no magic leash on a slayer, there are no words that can be chanted to bring her to heel, the watchers have to use standard psychological manipulation to control her. a slayer who realizes that she has more in common with vampires on a fundamental level than she does humans (tho not on a moral or motivation level obvs) is very dangerous to their control and to the concept of "slayer as sheepdog" as a whole. conditioning them to see vampires as animals and not sentient humanoid beings with thoughts, feelings, hopes and dreams, who have souls that while demonic are no less valid in their existence then any human one is integral to keeping the machine working and keeping your young emotionally/mentally vulnerable weapon from having a nervous breakdown because she just you know, massacred a whole bunch of people. fangy people, but people none the less.

btvs and the watcher council mentality the main btvs cast is tainted by is incredibly human centric, watch even a little of ats and it becomes glaringly obvious. ats is extremely flawed but one of it's strongest points was letting us see the expanded world of demons and non-human culture. the issue is then that buffy and co come off as rabid human-centrists because of how they talk about vampires and demons as a whole. there's a reason tara didn't want them to know she was half demon when she thought that line was true. the scoobies spout anti-demon rhetoric like it's their jobs. the way they treat anya is horrendous and it's because she has the Taint of demon and neurodivergence coding (which is a whole different kettle so).

the continued talk about spike like he's a subhuman while he's either at their mercy or on their side is galling. you cannot be called the good guys and then treat other sentient creatures like animals and vermin to be killed or mocked for your amusement. full stop. you cannot claim a moral high ground and behave like this which is what the scoobies consistently claim. they believe they are in the moral right and have the moral high ground consistently. when in reality they are pretty fucked up and have done repugnant immoral shit multiple times (hello all the various scoobie caused invasions of personal autonomy!). you can be a protagonist and have uh... Dodgey Morals™ (ex. the punisher) but when you claim you are better because you have better morals but also refuse to see the other side as even worthy of being seen as a truly living creature with like feelings and shit now i'm treating you with contempt.

there are people who will say that buffy was the sole victim of the toxicity that is s6 spuffy but if you believe that you also are tacitly agreeing that her belief that spike is an "it", an animal with no bodily autonomy to respect or feelings to hurt or be manipulated is true. and why? because he's a vampire? he has a soul, a demonic soul. he literally would not exist if a metaphysical entity/force hadn't entered william pratt's fucking corpse and make it theirs. this is an inherently repugnant act and even if we all sit down and agree she did nothing else to contribute to this toxicity she still looked another sentient being who she knew had some kind of feelings for her, used his want and his desperation to abuse herself with and spent the entire time considering him as something between cattle and a lamp. i'm sorry but that's wildly fucked up at it's core and if you can't see that i worry for you.

what if she was dating a nice half-bracken guy and she did all that shit to him? if he tried to stop her from turning herself in for a crime she didn't commit and then beat him bloody and called him an it, a thing, not a person, not real? are you still okay with that because he's a demon? are humans the only species in your eyes with the right to personhood in this universe? do you, like buffy and co, prefer to take the words of a group known to manipulate everything and who treat girls like buffy as things themselves over the evidence you see before your eyes on screen and the actions and words of the demons themselves? buffy's actions towards spike from s4 to s6 are repugnant because they're no longer enemies and she's no longer the council's attack dog but she still refuses to give him the basic decency of personhood.

and you can get into all kinds about shit about how vampires are evil and he's done terrible things and i will not respect you for using any of that to try and say it's okay to treat someone who you relay on or are in any kind of relationship with like they're a thing. otherization and depersonification are tools used to make it "okay" to commit atrocities. for every spike who you say it's "okay" to treat like an animal, there's a harmony who isn't really all that bad and happily switches to bagged blood and integrates pretty peacefully into human society when given the chance. and she will get put right next to spike as an animal to be killed because she doesn't matter. using his past actions to deny him the right of personhood is a lazy tactic to divert the discussion and absolve buffy and co of moral failings.

the nazis are also evil, but i will not deny they are people. doesn't mean i wouldn't take the shot if i had one if i was put in that position. it just means i acknowledge i ended a life that probably meant something to someone. and that's my issue with buffy and co. that's my issue with "vampires are soulless" and buffy's treatment of spike in s6 and how people talk about it. regardless of literally anything else either of them did, denying another sentient being the right to be acknowledged as one while still demanding things from them is inherently a core repugnant act. she is willing to use his feelings and body for her advantage but also refuses to respect them as real and just as valid as hers. again, how would you feel if she treated lorne like this? if she demanded things of him but didn't respect his basic right to be seen as a valid sentient being just like her?

in btvs vampires have souls, demons have souls, and they all deserve the basic decency to have that acknowledged. even by the slayer. especially by the slayer frankly since she is also in her own way One Of Them and if she's going to hunt them down and kill them she can at least acknowledge that she ended a life and didn't just flip an off switch. if you can't get with this whole concept of the validity of non-human life in a universe where the MCs humanity is frequently questioned and the Other and Otherism is frequently a theme then i really am not interested in talking to you.

[nalyra-dreaming]

So I was thinking about vampires and like humanity. And I was wondering if you could explain the set up for me in TVC universe. In Buffy, a demon takes over and the vampire basically loses his soul, but they can still have a high humanity depending on the demon and how much he is in control, so to speak. Angelus is very much in control over a soulless Angel, but Spike and William aren't all that different in the end. In the TVD they have a humanity switch, and their personalities don't change much, there's just the blood lust that seems to control them and they slightly less souled, but still very human in so many ways. I was just wondering how Anne saw this? Are they soulless, does a demon take over? Do they remain 'human' but lose that over the course of time, due to the killing and desire for blood. And the predatory nature that starts to dominate?

Anne's vampires... are mutated humans.

The blood, the possessed blood, changes them over time, by mutating their cells into Lucastria, which is what makes them look a bit differently the older or more powerful they are.

I say the blood is possessed, because that is how vampires are created here - a spirit possesses Akasha, and she becomes the first blood drinker. That spirit is passed on with the blood, resulting in problems later. (They find a way to remove it in the end and keep the blood that turns them).

As mutated humans these vampires suffer from/with this curse. They have souls, big themes in the books come back to guilt and forgiveness, and there is literal interaction with the divine. The hunger for blood propels them, because it is the moment of the kill that carries the biggest ecstasy for them, the biggest intimacy. They simply become more and more divorced from humanity over time, due to the fact that they go on... and humans don't.

These vampires are not evil - and a big theme is also that they often cannot accept that, and make up reasons for their existence, for their killing, despite there not being one...

This isn't Buffy, or TVD, to make that very clear. They're not evil, they're not good. They're not demons. They're not angels. The stories will not circle around action tales, not really. They don't have a switch for humanity, that humanity is always there. In the good and the bad.

They are, by fate and circumstance, and they suffer.

They are our dark mirror.

[becomingbuffypodcast]

While not fully fleshed out, “Primeval” brought a few storylines and characters full circle, while also setting up for the next episode, “Restless.” The theme for season 4 was identity, and how a person’s true nature cannot be controlled or changed. This was represented through the very masculine Initiative, who strove to control not only the impulses of demons, but those of their own men. From all the way back in episode 7, the show subtly compared Spike and Riley through blocking, dialogue, and framing—and here the metaphor becomes reality as it is revealed that Riley also has a chip. Yet, just like Spike in “Doomed,” Riley realizes that while he may be physically controlled, he still has free will. Just as the chip doesn’t change Spike’s impulses, as we see him hurting the Scoobies with his words, so it doesn’t change Riley’s, and this is something the Initiative doesn’t understand.

Ironically, Adam seems to know this on some level, as he has broken free from Maggie Walsh’s conditioning. He should know that he can’t change Riley’s mind, yet he’s convinced that he can force him to take part in accomplishing Maggie Walsh’s plan of forced uniformity.

In contrast, Buffy and the Scoobies represent what happens when we embrace the things that make us unique—both in ourselves and others. Instead of conforming to those around us, we use our strengths to challenge and build up one another in a way that promotes growth and creativity. The use of magic and feminism as a metaphor for life and flourishing is shown through “super-Buffy,” as she turns bullets into doves.

The twist in all this, is that the Scoobies combine with Buffy in the final fight through channeling the essence of the Slayer—a role that is defined by its singularity. In doing so, once again, Buffy is defying her own conditioning and making her own path. After all, as Buffy reassures her metaphorical heart (Xander), just before facing Adam--she won’t be alone.

[layer-of-slayers]

Season 6 AU where after Tara dies and Willow saves Buffy but before she goes after Warren, she finds the talisman D'Hoffryn gave her in s4 and she decides in the heat of the moment to become a vengeance demon.

Vengeance demon rules make it impossible for Willow to wreak personal vengeance on the trio, not that Willow knows this until it's too late, but thankfully there is someone she knows who has no qualms wishing Warren dead, as we see in canon... Dawn. Not sure what consequences this would have but I personally would like to see it!

Becoming a demon also means all the pain and hatred and desire for vengeance that were too big for her frail little human body are now easily accommodated in her brand new immortal demon body, so Willow is no longer out of control. She’s in pain, yes, but this body was made to hold and nurture vengeance, so it cannot take her over or overwhelm her.

And she has Anyanka right there to show her the ropes and welcome her into demonhood! Anyanka would be able to tell that Willow is no longer human as soon as it happened, and now Xander and Buffy have to deal with Willow being a demon with no soul who is also still recognisably Willow, who still loves them and wants to fight by their side. Can Willow keep it up? Can she keep D'Hoffryn and Buffy happy? Anya struggled with it and eventually chose to give up demonhood but what if together they found a way to walk the line? I'd love to see a season 7 where Buffy has two vengeance demons on her side!

Wait, actually, vengeance demons can create whole new realities, what if instead of wishing Warren dead, Dawn had the foresight of thinking beyond vengeance and to the wealth of possibilities enough to wish for something even better? What if she wished Tara had never died? Could Willow grant it? Would they need to figure out a way to phrase it so they get Tara back while also wreaking vengeance? Or would they need to make Tara be the vengeance in order for a vengeance demon to be able to grant the wish? (Could they make her life vengeance against someone who hates her? Tara being happy and out and free could be considered vengeance against her family maybe?) What if the way they phrase it means that Tara comes back wrong? Or that they get a different Tara from another universe?

[whimsyqueen]

To Make a Fool of Death; The Vampire Rules

I mentioned yesterday that I wanted to make a post about the specifics of the worldbuilding in To Make a Fool of Death, and today is Worldbuilding Wednesday, so here it is! I'm still messing around with some ideas and things, but this is where I'm at right now. I'll be tagging the Vampire Club Taglist below!

First and foremost, it's important to note that To Make a Fool of Death began as a love letter to Tim Hutchings' 1,000 Year Old Vampire. I began writing Verity's story as a series of diary entries using that format, and I will be forever grateful to indie tabletop games and solo journaling games for allowing me that. Go check it out, if you get the chance!

Because of that, and because of a lot of my own biases towards vampire lore, a lot of what you're gonna see here is... pretty basic. If it ain't broke, don't fix it! However, there are a few things that I really love about Hutchings' vampire lore that I've decided to include and extrapolate on, because it makes this whole thing just so much more interesting for me.

I'm gonna talk in terms of Verity, mostly, because she's the main vampire we experience throughout the story (though there are a few more) and kinda go basic myth-by-myth, if y'all don't mind. If there's anything I miss or anything y'all have further questions about, please feel free to just ask me! I love talking about these guys, and will take any excuse to do it!

First Myth: Vampires can shapeshift into bats

True! I like this one, and so I decided to stick with it. Yes, Verity can turn into a bat. I feel like not enough vampire media utilizes this nowadays, most of them go straight for the mind-control powers. I get it, they're cool, I heavily considered them for a while (and they're present in Verity's original diary, but I've since edited them out) but turning into a bat is just so much cooler to me?

Second: Vampires cast no reflection

Also true! Listen, I know that this is based in the idea of pure silver having been used to make mirrors in the past and in the present is entirely irrelevant and wouldn't be the case, but there's just something so interesting and sad to me about a vampire not being able to check her reflection before she goes on a date. At around 350 years or so, Verity's gotten pretty good at knowing how she looks without mirrors, but still!!!

Third: Vampires cannot cross running water

False! Verity loves to travel, and does it frequently. She can go where she wants, when she wants, as long as it's at night (for personal reasons she stays away from churches, and Massachusetts.)

Fourth: Vampires are destroyed by sunlight

True! Sorta... Direct sunlight, yeah, fuck you, you're toast (HAH) because it will burn you to pieces Buffy-The-Vampire-Slayer style. HOWEVER. Indirect sunlight is fine! A day that is cloudy and gross and you can't see the sun in the sky because the rain is so thick? As long as you've got your long sleeves, parasol, sunglasses, etc, you'll be a-okay. Just keep an eye out for those changes in weather, you wouldn't wanna get caught outside with nowhere to turn...

Fifth: Vampires must sleep in their native earth/in a coffin

False! The Fool of Death vampires simply do not sleep at all, not in a coffin, not in the earth, not anywhere. They don't need to, they're designed to be the ultimate predators. Why sleep when you can hunt?

Sixth: Vampires are "undead"

True! You have to die to become a vampire, and often, humans can be saved from the cold embrace of death by getting turned into a vampire! The process of becoming a vampire will literally kill you and then bring you back, entirely changed. Vampires do not have a heartbeat, they do not have anything that would indicate that they "live" and they heal so fast that to cut one open and try to figure out what's going on inside would be entirely pointless (trust Verity here, she's tried to figure out her own anatomy via this process MORE THAN ONCE)

Seventh: Vampires must drink blood to survive

Hm... true, to a point. While Vampires do consume blood as their main source of food, it isn't impossible to go entirely without. However, the downside to this is that if you starve yourself long enough, eventually you enter what Verity refers to as the Blood Frenzy, which is where if there's blood around? You NEED to consume it. No ifs ands or buts, and you will consume it in the messiest, most immediate way possible. It really is best to just... not starve yourself here. And don't even start with the whole "animal blood" thing, no it doesn't work, it's the same as if a vampire were to try to eat a cheeseburger. It's gotta be human or nothing, babe.

Eighth: Vampires hate garlic

False! Vampires simply don't eat. They have no need to, and can't really... digest food in the same way that a human can. The same could be said for garlic as it could for all foods. They avoid them because there's just no point.

Ninth: Vampires cannot be killed/are immortal/invincible

False! While they're ALMOST invincible, they can still super die if you really really put your mind to it. The most effective way to go about it would be to behead the vampire, and then toss the body and the head into a big ol' fire (ideally a fire that you've pre-prepared, because you truly won't have that much time before the vampire wakes up again and starts trying to fix itself...) They'll only really burn if the body is in small enough pieces, though, so feel free to get creative!

Tenth: All vampires have sharp fangs with which to suck blood

Only halfway false. Most vampires do, yes, absolutely, without question. I think they're sexy. However, what I will say is this. All vampires have some sort of "mark" that designates them as one of their kind, and they can procure more "marks" the more inhuman acts they commit. The most common first "mark" that appears upon turning is yes, fangs, for almost everyone, but it's sort of like a genetic trait. Not everyone gets them. Other examples of "marks" like this are Verity's bright red eyes (which Benevolence received when she was turned) or various sort of stains on the skin (like magical evil tattoos that don't do anything). Sometimes they also present as indications of the way you were originally killed (the two dot scars on the neck, for example, appear on some, or the faint ghosts of other scars that have remained past the change from human to vampire.)

I hope you enjoyed reading this, and have gotten some decent insight into Verity's world and how she operates! Be sure to check back here for more info, I post as often as I can (and I'm a busy bitch rn)! See below the cut for the taglist, and how to join if you wanna stay up-to-date on all the vampire news!!

Thank you for reading! If you'd like to join the taglist, you can do so here! @athenixrose @bardic-tales @drowsy-quill @thelibraryofchaos @cyparissos @kittyphoenix12-xx @destiniescollide @aeipathys @fearofahumanplanet @cactusmotif @writeblrsupport @midnights-melodiverse @ninirito @antique-symbolism-main @annetilney @athenswrites @the-void-writes @wip-nook

[samscompliment]

hi neve let’s chat<3 i’ll do 1 and 19 pls

hiiiii camilla <33333

1. what's the fic youre most proud of?

ok i already said the lovers choice for this one so instead im going to use my answer spot here to say that every day i think about your nb dean fic and hope to read it<3 like no pressure or anything but i would totally read it in its work in progress state if that was an option. its my white whale. nb dean forever and ever and ever

19. if you could write an ideal fic, what would it include?

ok this is fun and also i talked forever so im gonna put this under a cut. so sorry you literally didnt ask for this but i simply dont know when to shut up i love writing soooooo much<3

so like to answer this one u have to understand that the lovers choise was my ultimate spn fix it but i wrote it while i was still on s7. you know???? it was so informed by early seasons spn and what i knew about the late seasons from tumblr and now i look at it and i go "um well cas definitely didnt know dean was in love with him and dean definitely DID know that he was in love so this is all wrong isnt it". like i do still love the first chapter a LOT but the rest of it. idk. so my ideal fic now would be a new spn fix it. bc i have. Thoughts. about what i need from a fix it having now seen s15.

i have this concept for a somewhat written fic that is told in two parts, one from cas' pov and one from dean's, and it is literally just the worst thing ever because the same things happen in both fics but they just interpret each other soooo badly. like i just cannot get over the miscommunication that happens in the show and ideally i would love to actually wrestle with that bc i say all the time that i think its their biggest roadblock and so i would love to actually deconstruct it one day. and it would have to include literally everything i feel ab them post s15, in the same way that tlc had to include everything i was feeling about them at the time. which now would be, like: dean letting go of his control issues, dean apologising to jack, unpacking all the John Stuff, crowley causing problems on purpose, some good old fashioned betrayal, a bit of godstiel thrown in, cas actually getting what he wants for once. and like i really really want to give cas his buffy s6 arc. idk if that means anything to you but i really want cas to have been genuinely at peace in the empty and then be brought back to life to a dean who is NOT ready to play happy families and for cas to be like WHAT the fuck. like he was literally never going to have to deal with the consequences of his actions and it was great but then DEAN brought him back and DEAN didn’t bring it up and in doing so he both REJECTED and DISMISSED miette. and so cas is like well FUCK you then im going to be a bitch. idk. im going to stop talking now. sorry for writing an essay that could have been 2 sentences. i love you <3