#also damn if she doesn't love a burning metaphor

[annieisyourfavourite]

the poems in my notes app are so good oh my god. who wrote these cuz it surely couldn't have been this foggy brained bitch

[hadesisqueer]

Hey so, one thought about the Beach that gets more painful when you know how Azula's story ends in the finale: She ALMOST opens up to the others, but then IMMEDIATELY puts her metaphorical mask back on the second she realizes this.

She very clearly DESIRES a genuine bond with her companions, but thanks to Ozai, she has no idea HOW to function like a normal person!

It's HEARTBREAKING to see her so clearly aware that there's SOMETHING wrong with her, but having no idea how to actually RESOLVE that. So she just defaults to appeasing her father. To being the monster people expect her to be.

Azula is such a tragic character because in another environment she could have been great. She was a firebending prodigy and her father favored her because of that, enabling her worst traits instead of trying to correct them so she could turn out to be just like him. Since Zuko wasn't as favored, her mother in turn paid more attention to him so he wouldn't feel left out, and you can see in the novels that she tried to get Ursa to also pay attention to her by doing the same things Ozai would usually praise her for, which caused Ursa to reasonably scold her; however, Ursa usually didn't scold her in the same way she scolded Zuko sometimes, by guiding him into doing the right thing. Instead, she scolded Azula by shutting her down, which caused Azula to rely more on Ozai than Ursa, thinking her mother didn't love her and showed favoritism for her brother, which isn't entirely wrong (although Ursa did love her; she simply connected more with Zuko because he reminder her of her first love, while subsconciously Azula reminded her more of Ozai).

Iroh seemed to have a similar relationship with them when they were kids, sending them both presents, although he seemed to get along more with Zuko, partly because he reminded Iroh of Lu Ten and partly because again, Azula relied a lot on her father who openly disliked Iroh. Then, Zuko was banished, and obviously, Iroh went with him; Zuko was a 13yo broken hearted child with half of his face burnt and sent away from home on his own to complete an impossible task. His abuse was more apparent and Iroh went with him because at the time, it seemed like he had it the worst (and also, again, because he was closer to him). I do think that if that had been Azula sent away, though—if she had somehow offended Ozai enough for him to burn her and banish her—Iroh would have probably tried to go with her regardless of how bad their relationship would have been, trying to show her the same guidance he showed Zuko. Damn, maybe even Zuko would have chosen to go with her, since that's his younger sister (and because he would have prefered going with his uncle and his younger sister who he doesn't get along with rather than staying completely alone with his father, maybe). Maybe it'd have worked, spending years in a different environment with someone who tried to help her and didn't treat her like a living weapon who could easily be disposed of whenever she no longer was useful to him. Zuko himself said that the best thing Ozai did for him was banishing him. Maybe it would have been the best thing for Azula too.

[thirstyforred]

you knew i'm gonna ask about it

posession, this bit: "And Roderick gets it, in some weird way, it makes a lot of sense. While Adda asked if she could leave her mark on Roderick's skin, Jacques just didn't bother with consent and did it. But on a soul. Or mind. Or whatever - the space between the eyes, so if someone were to open Roderick's skull all they would find would be Jacques' name in bold letters. Multiple times, repeating itself in strings, coiling and spiraling together, chaotic and impossible to read and convey its meaning, but in the end, all spelling the same name. Over and over."

rastodi is the star but i swear the jacques part is what got me

the ask game

oooo, thank you Elis 🥰 and damn, I love this moment as well.

The whole story is about these contrasts, how these people treat Roderick, how far he lets them go, and that second sentence really spells it out. Adda asked, but Jacques didn't bother. (And in the later part we have Pastodi, who is in a position where he can't claim ownership of Rod, yet, but can start asking about different things)

Jacques is also such a weirdo, because despite having so much influence over Rod, leaving this metaphorical scar on his mind, being the most impactful, he's also the least interested. For Jacques leaving such a mark on Rod is an afterthought, something obvious, natural outcome of their relationship. That's also why in one other story, after leaving the burn mark on Rod, he immediately takes it back. Scarring Roderick just doesn't seem that effective, good.

And of course there's the Spiral. I love the Spiral, I think everyone should get into the Spiral. Yes, it's just one throwaway line in a book, but it's still such a fascinating aspect of the world. And it fits with Jacques, meshes with him so well, so every time I write him I need to bring a spiral motive as well.

Writing name of your loved one can be sweet, the loved one writing it on your can be as well. But then there's this horror-like image of unhinged writing, all over the walls, claims of possession, that you can't read. Roderick doesn't know Jacques real/childhood name. Jacques is for a second this devil or eldritch monster with absolute and horrible power, who can't be stopped, because you don't know its true name.

And going back to the beginning of this except, which is just amazingly chosen 💕, the worst part of all of this, is the fact that Roderick is aware how fucked he is. Yes, he's an idiot and buffon, and all the other things, but the situation is so much worse considering he understands it. Maybe even better than Adda and Pastodi, Rod knows what they do to him. He cannot be smarter than Jacques, but he understands that as well. And yet, despite all of that, Roderick himself says that in some ways he loves them and wouldn't leave. And that's just stupid and tragic.

[gingerbreadmonsters]

cu-wip-osity tag game <3

i'm not apologising for the pun. thank you to the gorgeous @pinksparkl for the tag - your wips all sound absolutely WONDERFUL!! i do hope mine don't disappoint - some of these have been burning in google docs hell for, uh, some time... they're vaguely in order of how recently i looked at them, but it's not exactly perfect lol

rules: reveal the titles of the documents in your WIP folder and tag as many people as there are documents. let others ask questions about the ones that interest them, and post snippets or explain the contents as you see fit!

easy pickings - the follow-up to resist and elongate. vega and warden being their usual, nauseously-adorable, violently-murderous selves while tying the (metaphorical and literal) knot.

solution euphoria - my beloved companion cube au! i read LAB RAT and i was never the same again. what if vindemiator had stayed to help attack the imperial palace?

kiss the ring - imagine if the solaire house had, like, a jewellery shop underneath it. now imagine vincent and lovely wandering around in there and flirting a bit. it's good isn't it

hold 'em - this is the gavin bondage fic i mentioned the other day! there's a chair, there's some rope, you know the drill. i have a note at the beginning that just says "glasses???", but there's nothing in the actual text that matches with that, so i guess he's wearing glasses of some sort...? idk i'll figure it out

slip of the tongue - ngl this is basically my gavin appreciation document, it's kind of just non-stop kissing for a few thousand words. there's a thin pretense of plot but that's really all it is

captive audience - vega and warden domestic bliss: the fic. this is basically a short side story for easy pickings (above), because i wanted to write this particular scene but it doesn't quite fit. they have breakfast, it's cute, until you remember what they like to eat for breakfast and then it's decidedly less cute and more horrifying.

extracurriculum - i think zo put me up to this? lovely and vincent having some alone time in one of the empty stairwells at DAMN. it's exactly what it sounds like.

thicker than water - ooh i have not looked at this for a WHILE! this is much more violent than i normally go in for, but it's basically vincent and alexis beating each other into the floor for a few thousand words. i guess i was having an off day?

rose and cherry red - believe it or not, i haven't TOTALLY abandoned to the egress! - this is part of that series! it's essentially just sam waxing poetic about his life for a bit, i guess. unfortunately, i'm not great at writing sam and i'm not particularly into him, so it's taking literally forever lmao

hometown hero - i'm sure you're all familiar with @sri-rachaa's wonderful southern siblings au, where sam is lovely's older brother, and this is basically an offshoot of that. oh, family left behind.

out of my head - i think alexis deserves to be olivia newton-john every once in a while. also i was listening to the song and i thought she would like it, so here we are.

technicolour - gavin nolastnamegiven meets 'if i only had a brain' from the wizard of oz. i like to think that he doesn't think he's good enough, and then that thought makes me sad, so this exists to remind me that he IS good enough.

no-pressure tags: @zozo-01 @autisticempathydaemon @romirola @lovelylonerliterature @haradasaya @bicyclepainting 💕💕💕💕💕💕

[youareinlove]

i want to hear all about suburban legends

@anaddictiontofanfiction also wanted to know so here we go

the main thing that makes people think it's about mr tis the damn season (drew) is the high school motif. but if you compare the way she addresses it, it doesn't really parallel well with the ways it's addressed in the other songs about/inspired by that situation. in tis the damn season and dorothea, it's very direct, mostly because it's storytelling, and in midnight rain (which i also don't think is about him but i'm going to bite for the sake of contrasting them) it's also talking about it in the frame of where she came from/what could've been. we don't get a lot of that in suburban legends. it's much more akin to how she addresses high school in maathbp, as a metaphor for the media and the public's general perception of her. the "high school reunion" feels a lot more like a red carpet/hollywood society type of deal in the way she talks about it. and also, their "mismatched star signs" (which was also only half literal, and more like a metaphor for how incompatible they were on a fundamental level but also kinda on the surface level, which is a different discussion), DID surprise the whole "school" if you interpret school to mean the media of the time. i mean the headlines were definitely shocked. the words vicious, ruthless, and mean would also apply but i digress

1989 also has a lot of recurring themes, but the most prevalent of them is the idea that the relationship depicted is doomed from the start. see: "we go crashing down but we come back every time" "could end in burning flames or paradise" "we're a crooked love in a straight line down," all of wildest dreams, "i knew it from the very start, we're a shot in the darkest dark" (another vault track but people agree that one's about harry so). and suburban legends is very much carrying through that story

see: "and you kiss me in a way that's going to screw me up forever" (she knows it'll end badly) "when you told me we'd get back together" (alluding to the on and off relationship).

except what sets suburban legends apart from all the other songs is that after an entire album of talking about how it's probably going to end badly, it...does. "i broke my own heart cause you were too polite to do it, waves crash on the shore, i dash to the door, you don't knock anymore, and my whole life's ruined." and then she ends with "and i always knew it" because she's spent the last 19 tracks telling us about how she always knew it! (also "i pace down your block" is a direct parallel to i wish you would except now she's the one doing the pacing lol)

[invisiblegarters]

Dangerous Romance Ep 4

Here we are again! When we last met, Kang wanted to get a reward for being a good boy, but dad didn't care if he was or wasn't and got him what he requested for his birthday anyway. Kang was very sad, so Sailom gave him someone to be a good boy for.

"That means Sailom can't control you." Grandma. Give it a little bit of time, he's working on it.

And I think she knows, in some way. Because she seems to know that telling Kang she'll find him a new tutor if he can't pass his midterms is exactly the motivation he needs to actually study. Especially when Kang feels responsible for making sure that Sailom doesn't wind up beaten up at the end of the month (apparently this has happened before, which is horrifying. My guess that the time when Kang found him is the first time it went as far as threatening to burn his skin off with an iron, though. Still, it's terrifying because that means the escalation has been happening for a while).

Aw, studying montage. Cute.

Oop, a metaphor. Thank you Kang for hitting that particular nail right on its head, we might have missed it otherwise.

"Do I really have any influence over you?" Yes, Sailom you really really do.

I don't think Kang is gonna pass. But I appreciate how much Sailom believes in him.

And there it is. F in chem. For a second there I thought that Kang wasn't gonna tell Sailom he failed one. But he did. And aw, the reaction was good. Seriously though, it is impressive that he only failed on subject if he usually fails most of them.

The little glance up at Sailom was cute. Oh, Kang. Your face is gonna give you away every time. Perth and his teeny tiny little expression changes that let you know exactly where his character's head is at.

Do they...not know that they can still hang out if Sailom isn't tutoring Kang anymore? Because they totally can. I guess Sailom might be busy with all his jobs but also, it's not like they're never gonna see each other again.

Sailom out here collecting all the umbrellas.

I love Auto.

No but seriously you two can still hang out. Are we really doing this "different worlds" bullshit when no one even seemed to care in the first place that you two were spending all the time together? Although well, highschool. And I guess it's different when you have an excuse. But still, this pining music and longing glances stuff is a lot. Boys. Get it together (but don't actually get it together, I'm having way too much fun watching this you two are ridiculous).

PIM. HI.

Aw damn you show. I was hoping sports day would be an excuse for them to hang again. They were both clearly hoping for it.

It worries me that Sailom's issues look to be snowballing. Are we gonna get the escort bits sooner than later? I won't pretend that I'm not looking forward to that.

Faster than I thought. Not complaining. Even if he doesn't do it right away we're getting the ball rolling and I am so here for that. Let's do this!

Oooh that meal looks good.

Escort escort ESCORT.

Oooh Kang is disappointed. Look asshole, not all of us have money. This is just making me think of 3 Will Be Free though.

Lol but Pim is far too observant not to see what's up with Kang here. I mean, I think he's also just worried. He's got a whole protection complex going on with Sailom right now on top of whatever else he may or may not feel, so of course he's not going to like the idea of Sailom playing escort for cash.

Aw Pim you're sweet but this has to chafe. Sailom still has his pride. My bet though is that he'll reject Kang's offer where he accepted Pim's, because the pity probably feels worse coming from him. Let's see if I'm right!

Oh but that offer is...damn. Okay. Sailom's pride can't be worth more than that, although I have to wonder if this will introduce a new dynamic between them because he has to know that it was Kang's doing that Grandma made that offer. I feel like at some point Sailom's need to take care of himself is going to butt heads with Kang's need to take care of him. Financially, I mean, since Kang certainly seems to like being spoiled in other ways, lol.

And ha! Cohabitation hijinks to ensue? Guess we'll find out next week.

Oh, they better not be doing a Pim has a crush on one of them thing. Please. I like the dynamics without that. Plus I'm still hoping for a ViewJune pair up in this drama. Do the right thing, show!

In conclusion, this better not be the end of escorting, dammit.

[wandering-lane]

Inspired by the song The Goose and The Wren by Hop Along

I've got a bit of a story worked out behind the song in my brain that's Ace Attorney-ed that isn't obvious from just the drawing (Duh), but I think the drawing is also cool on its own, so a bit of an explanation is below! Warnings for Ace Attorney: Spirit of Justice spoilers!

Sorry for no background, I couldn't figure that much out :')

The Goose and The Wren is a VERY good song that I feel matches up very well with my personal interpretation of Nahyuta's character, as well as the events of Spirit of Justice in general.

The Characters-

Goose- Nahyuta, I used specifically a Swan Goose because A, They live in the area I'd imagine Khura'in is, and B, perty goose :)

Wren- Apollo, Small, pointy, need I say more?

Heron- Dhurke, Big boy and also it makes more sense later into the song

"While in the form of the ant The goose and the wren Left the shores of Maryland To find better oxygen"

A baby Apollo and Nahyuta fleeing the conflict of their home country mayhaps?

"While the outcry of twenty men Run from the nearby battalion As if we avoid their light That we might make it home tonight"

Dhurke and the defiant dragons fleeing from the soldiers chasing em

"And one old crook Carries a very heavy book Friends would say 'Sir Are you sure some good Could come of your learning?'"

Bet you can't guess who the old crook is (It's Dhurke)! The book would be Baby Apollo and Nahyuta, the friend is ya boi Datz

"And he said 'My girl gave it to me Just before the war I've never read a book like this before It's giving me kind of a kind of a, kind of a Burning'"

I mean, Amara WOULD have given birth only a bit before she "Died", and Dhurke wouldn't have known much or anything about Apollo. Also the burning bit.. That goes for both of the kiddos, but especially Polly.

"But if it is love then I'm not quite sure if I should keep it But I've heard it's a part of the whole so I guess I need it But I'll certainly be sure to stay above the ground Lately beautiful things got a way of bringing me down"

Mans is basically a kill-on-site wanted criminal. He probably questioned if bringing two small children who not only would be in danger, but also a liability if they were, say, held hostage. But also it's his family and Dhurke is a family man so he takes 'em anyways. He'll certainly be sure to stay away from trouble, and his beautiful things were almost all taken away from him. "Dead" wife moment.

"Here lie one hundred men Fighters every one of them They went into the light and oh no They won't be home tonight"

A post-soj Nahyuta reminisces on his mistakes as a prosecutor, leading not only countless innocent people to their deaths and imprisonments, but also the deaths and imprisonments of the defense attorneys, Defiant Dragons, all people that he was once part of.

"And I came upon a kid with a kite Despite the storms said he's going to fly So I said 'Brother What would your mother say?'"

He thinks back on his younger self, filled with dreams of a bright future. He was going to go into the fray, and he'd lead the Dragons to victory. He thinks back on what he would change.

"And he said 'Hold your tongue! It was a present And God damn I am a man I ain't afraid of the rain!'"

A young headstrong Nahyuta's response to his own older self's warning. He doesn't fear the Ga'ran regime. He's untouchable. (I also like to think of the kite and it being a present as a metaphor to the Defiant Dragon tattoo on his palm. He was given the trust of his father and the Dragons, and that was all he needed.)

"But what can a bystander do? No more than watch the spidery lights take a hold of you But you know I warned you boy You know I told you boy I'll hold you back boy But now I don't know but Cause in a curious kind of way I want to grow along with you"

More reminiscing, he can't do anything to change his past decisions. All he can do is remember as Ga'ran (Spidery lights. It works too perfectly.) wraps a wire around a neck and pulls him into her manipulation. Nahyuta admonishes his younger self, but he also knows that he was carefree and happy back then, and that the reason he's where he is today is because of the past.

"And morning did come I was standing struck dumb By the man in the sun And the only live one Held a string from his thumb That stretched up to the sky Where the heron flew by Singing 'Oh me and oh my!'"

But the storm passed, and the man in the sun (This one's too easy) came, holding the string that connected them all together. To the Heron, Dhurke, to Nahyuta, and to Apollo.

"And the goose and the wren No I have not seen them But the water looks nice So I dare not think twice And I'm sure that they're fine Very good friends of mine Cause sometimes I can't tell When things are unwell"

He isn't back in the mountains with Apollo, but things are calming now, and he doesn't have to worry about Ga'ran's noose around his neck anymore.

"By the look of the sea Starting straight back at me And I miss 'em I do But I think it is true That when the love go It's the lovers who show Just how lovely they are In a song or a scar"

He misses his childhood, but look where he is now. He has Apollo, he has his mother, his sister, all these people. I always tend to think of the "When the love go" part as Nahyuta thinking about Apollo and Klavier. In a song, or a scar (I always hear that part as Star but either works fine).

"Sincerely your friend Write back to me, Wren I've been thinking too much Down here in the sand"

Literally him just thinking about Apollo and bein like don't leave me hangin broski :')

"The farmer stands and says 'What happened to the land? It used to be fertile. It used to be good, when I was a lad.'"

Dhurke looking over Khura'in (Or the law, or both), and commenting on the corruption seeded into it.

"The farmer calls out to his men says 'It's getting late boys, it's best you come back in.'"

It switches from Dhurke yelling to the Defiant Dragons to him just calling out to baby Apollo and Nahyuta. To his sons, telling them to come back inside before it gets too late.

That part repeats a couple times after that, but anyways.

If you can't tell this has a whole animatic in my head that I might put onto paper someday. I've thought far too much about this song.

Anyways pt 2 hope you all enjoy my thoughts, they plague me so now they get to plague you as well.

[lovingcorleone]

“Stronger Together, Weaker Without” — Michael Corleone x Reader

(gifcredit)

Summary: Y/N and Michael were put into a difficult situation, when unexpected things happened just before their wedding.

Pairing: Michael Corleone x Fem!Reader

Request: "Hello could you do one where Michael Corleone and his wife are having a difficult time at the wedding and are trying to talk to resolve it?" — @loveilovetoo

Author's note: (English is my second language.) ; I needed to overcome writer's block, and that's why it took me so long - my sincere apologies! I really hope you will enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Warning: strong language, sappy conversation?

STRONGER TOGETHER, WEAKER WITHOUT

Friday, the day before wedding.

It is safe to say that many things went wrong on your and Michael's wedding weekend. It all started a day before the ceremony and you weren't sure what to think about it. First, the main bridesmaid, your best friend B/F/N, called you early in the morning, telling that she was sorry but she didn't feel twice as good and probably caught some illness. That would be okay, it wasn't a big deal, because these things just happen and you cannot really prevent them. Little did you know that it was only the beginning of a nightmare.

With this information you went right to Michael to tell him the news, but he only assured you that, yes, it was dissapointing, but nothing that couldn't be solved easily. You only wished this was the first and also the last unpleasant thing of the whole wedding. Another suprise came later in the afternoon when Michael got a call from Tom. Your soon to-be husband was hesistant at first if he should tell you that place where you two were suppossed to have your first dance as married couple, was completely burned down. He quietly came to you and gave you a tight hug. „I have good and bad news.“ he started, „I guess you want to hear the bad news first, huh?“ You pulled back from his hug and gave him worried look. „What happened?“ „So ... the thing is that our venue is gone. Burned down. I'm so sorry, sweetheart. But! The good news is that people who did that are already caught.“ After he had spoken, you were speechless. You couldn't find the words. You blankly stared at Michael, then turned away from him and hugged yourself. „Why would someone do that? Why? We deserve to be happy too, why can't we be?!“ you raised your voice a bit and a few tears escaped from your eyes from pure frustration. Your fiancé was desperate just as much as you were. His blood was boiling, but he knew he should be calm and supportive. Michael was heartbroken too. It was supposed to be his happiest weekend in his life.

Fortunately, your day ended without any more complications. You couldn't sleep with Michael in the same room, because tradition clearly said that it was forbidden and it brings bad luck, so you two just called each other that night. „Everything will be just fine. I promise you that. No one will take away our wedding day from us.“ „Michael, that sounded a bit threatening..“ you laughed, „But yeah. Tomorrow's about us.“

Saturday, Wedding Day, 6:00am.

You didn't have to wake up that early, but the thing was that, you had a very strong feeling that you should be fully awake no matter what. Also, around 7:15am Connie and Sandra promised you to come and start with your preparation for your big day. By that time you were just sitting on your bed watching sun rising up through your window. The bed felt so lonely without Michael in it. You got used to falling asleep and waking up next to him. You wondered if he was still sleeping.

In the middle of your showering, there was a loud knock on the door followed by excited voices of two girls mentioned above. „Come on, sleepyhead. We need you to get ready!“ said Connie with joyful voice. You opened the door with a towel covering your body and wet hair. „About damn time, dear. I hope you slept enough, because I'm sure that right after wedding there will be no sleep for you.“ continued Sandra and winked at you giving you a sign what she really meant by it. You giggled and hugged both of them. „Thanks. Thanks a lot for helping me. I don't know what would I do without you two.“ you sighed and sat at the chair in front of big mirror. It took Sandra about one hour to make your hair looking like it belonged to a princess. It was exactly what you wanted. Then it was Connie's turn with doing your make-up and, of course, it turned out even better than you expected. All of you were so satisfied with final result. Then you put on your dress. Now, you looked like a real princess. Your B/F/N was the one who helped you decide which dress was, metaphorically, made for you. Even though, she couldn't be there with you, the dress reminded you of her. For a minute, all your troubles suddenly disappeared and you were filled with pure joy.

Your silent admiration of your look was however interrupted by someone knocking on the door. Connie was the closest person to it so she carefully opened, but only her face was seen, in case if it was Michael looking for you. Luckily, it was not Michael, but his brother. Which was not good scenario either. „Sonny? Don't you have a work to do?“ Connie asked in quite annoyed voice, because he obviously interrupted their –girls moment-. Sonny was visibly nervous and his hairline was covered in drops of sweat. His sister could swear she saw a glimpse of fear in his eyes. „I need to speak to Y/N. Like right now.“ he said urgently and tried to step into the room, but Connie didn't let him to do so. „C'mon Connie. Just let me in...“ „Who's that?“ you asked with a raised voice so the person on the other side of the door could hear you.

„It's Sonny. I need to tell you somethin'.“ You nodded to Connie that she could let him in. He didn't hesitate and made his way right to you. His first reaction was adorable, because his look fell on your dress and then on your face. He widely smiled ready to give you some cheeky compliment, but he quickly remembered why he came there. „Okay, now, don't be mad.“ As he said that, your happy face dropped. „Everytime when someone says „Don't be mad.“, something really bad happened. I hope this is not that case.“ He made a squinted face and took a deep breath. „Look... aaagh...Something happened.“ „Continue...“ „You know.. your wedding rings...Well...ughh...they are kind of gone. We can't find them and we looked for them everywhere.“ he finally admitted as you fell down on your chair. „Oh my god.“ Sandra whispered and ran to hug you and Connie's jaw dropped down. „But ..how..? They were put in a safe place. Does Michael know?“ Sonny scratched the back of his head. „Tom and Fredo are tellin' him now.“

You felt your chest got tight and it was a bit harder for you to breathe. „Bridesmaid's ill, the venue is gone and so are the rings.“ you whispered holding back tears. For a moment there was a tense silence, and everyone in the room felt kind of embarrassed. The best day of your life turned out to be the worst. Connie didn't even had a chance to comfort you because you stood up with emotionless face and went to the door. You were about to stepped out of room, but Sonny gently grabbed your elbow. „Where are you going? You can't see Michael. It's a tradition..“ You angrily glared at him „Fuck tradition. I need to talk with Michael.“ Sonny let go of you very quickly and felt ashamed of his words. The situation was way more important than some tradition.

Your soon-to-be husband had the same idea. He was on his way to your room when you two bumped into each other at the corner.

„Our rings are gone.“ both of you said at the same time and he pulled you into a hug. Though his mind was full of emotions and mostly full of anger, he did notice how incredibly beautiful you were. Of course, for him you were beautiful everyday, but seeing you in wedding dress made him tear up a bit. He then suggested to move to some empty room so you could talk in private. You sat on a bed and Michael joined you. His arm hugged you over your shoulders and you gently put your head on his chest. After overcoming primary shock, you spoke first. „I don't feel like this is all just stupid coincidence.“ you sobbed and let the tears make their own way down your cheeks. „Then what do you think it is?“ he asked quietly. You raised your head and looked into his eyes. „What if this is a bad sign? At the moment, I feel like everything is ruined and we are just helplessly standing in the middle of the chaos not knowing what to do. What if we are not meant to be married.“ your voice broke and you couldn't keep looking into his eyes anymore. His arm fell off of your shoulders. He wiped away his own tears and got down on his knees grabbing your hands, which made you look at him. „So? Even if we are not meant to get married, that doesn't mean that we are not meant to be together, Y/N. I believe in us. But I need you to believe in us too.“ His voice was steady but you could hear how hard he tried to remain being steady. Not only your heart was breaking, his was too. Some couples would turn this situation into a humorous one, but for you and Michael, it was really serious. You sniffled and bit your lip. „I believe in us too. But these things don't happen without a reason. I just- I don't know.“ „I love you. Do you love me?“ You were shocked by his question. „Of course, I do. You are my everything, Mike.“ you sobbed again and his finger moved to your face and wiped away new tears. „You are my everything too. And I know how long you've dreamed about this day. We can cancel it if you want. Or we will face this very eventful day together. Like we always do with everything that crosses our path. How does that sound to you, hm?“ a very faint smile appeared on his lips. He made a good point. You could've run from it or face it. „The venue is destroyed, we don't have our rings and we also broke the tradition...Every single thing is against us. Maybe marriage can break this curse or whatever it is. Maybe we should shoot our shot.“ your lips formed into a weak smile. He took your face into his hands and kissed you softly. Then he added: „We will be okay. From now on.“

[benevadeca]

I ended up making a whole post light in the house and it ended up so damn long lmao. so yeah compilation of every scene in part 1 where imagery light is prominent:

the scene at the beginning! made me realize!! fire is not inherently a bad thing! it's a hearth, it gives them warmth they enjoy together. i think for Raymond initially it's something that gives him comfort- exactly as it should! A hearth is something that provides warmth, safety. But fire is dangerous, mesmerizing, something that shouldn't be left alone.

staring at the fire when dreading his relatives before they arrive / letting what they said get to him after they left. It's only after he's alone after internalizing what his relative's said against him that it becomes something dangerous. also the shift from the light being at their back to staring into it when the relatives are over is an interesting one.

Drinking which muddled his decision making > him going into the woods and seeing the carriage light only after he's internalized his relative's judgement / "you pig look at you, eleanor was right"

Him coming home and falling asleep while eating and the light being on contrasted w/ Mabel and her lying awake in the dark. I see I am seeing the contrast. (Honorable mention is Penny sitting embrodiering in the dark w/ the light on but looking away from it. The desire and insecurity are still lit within her but she doesn't have the same burning that same need that Raymond has to chase that rabbit hole)

Raymond convincing Penny to abandon their old lives, "the envy for miles around, a beacon of light on the hill"

Them moving into the new home with the sunlight blinding them from its rafters

light through the open windows when Penny moves in (Penny, who was literally introduced by her sewing abilities that she uses in service to her family to make items of necessity and use and out of love) where immediately after she physically sets Isobel down to look at the new sewing machine and the first thing she says is "such fine material" this movie is making me skitter on the walls

2 candles in the dining room shift to two electric lights > the shift from their old home to the new one, to artifical light. desire has been successfully lit in both of them now, shared between them.

Penny sewing at night now that she has artificial light that let's her stay awake all night to do so. Raymond staring into the fireplace even after the light has gone out. something something metaphorical about how even now that their desires have been met they still have that longing inside of them that for all the splendor around them has not been met.

I think all the workers have lights around them?

^ also still deeply confused on wtf is happening to the guy in the hole. like wtf.

Isobel being picked up out of her crib (in a room with just a single small light, but right after the scene Mabel expressed her dislike of their new living situation but didn't recieve any support for her feelings) > Isobel crawling

Mabel who would've succumbed to the hopeless detached loneliness of the house had it not been for her connection with her sister, for her sister leading her out of the sight of the house and them finding home together. (also the story book. how it's easy to doubt yourself and your perception when everyone around you is treating something that's painful, that they shouldn't get used to like it's normal)

Light behind Isobel when they have to go back to the house- they might've found solace but that doesn't change their situation. Joy and nostalgia of the past isn't enough to negate the ever-looming present.

Raymond sitting in front of the empty fireplace and how he "can't seem to get it going" while doing nothing and being able to light it before. He's gotten everything he's wanted so why isn't it enough? What else is there to chase after, what desire remains? I think it's very....something like, It's only through burning his old stuff/completely shedding past identity/sentiment can you fully amalgamate yourself into that projected "ideal" that you chase, that society (capitalism) projects is the key to happiness. regardless of the time period or the idea that's sold (it could be American Suburban Dream or Celebrity Minimalism or Nostalgic Pastoralism or Influencer Picture Perfection), they're just commodities sold and valued because of their unattainability.

Two lights in the windows superimposed as the eyes of the architect.

Lantern mabel carries to follow isobel/while they're lost upstairs. not sure abt the metaphor exactly uhhhh

WAIT i got it, the distinction between a stagnant light and a light you carry with you. all the fixtures in the house are eyes of the house/architect. only the lantern is used proactively to help them see. the light going out after mabel says she's "lost", no more direction no more guidance.

Fire in the carriage and in the house's fireplace. Raymond lost when he became ashame of his own home (his own "fire") and displaced it into the architect's. Accepted the architect's "vision" as his own and got sublimated into it instead of thinking critically abt what he and his family actually wanted/what was best for them. when you only want what other people tell you you've already failed to live your own life. and after sacrificing everything that makes you yourself, when everything you were collapses in on itself, that's when the fire goes out of control and the dream proves just how hollow it was the entire time. house of cards, sand castle, none of what they did provided real bones real structure or support.

At the very end, back to something real, back to daylight.

I forgot part 1 ended the same as part 3! Also I think both part 1 and 3 being bittersweet/having glimmers of hope highlights just how hopeless part 2 is. Like, living in a basement only to dig himself even further down into the dirt itself. (Also that the 2nd one takes place in modern times. really highlighting the realism of hopelessness under late capitalism hm!)

But yeah the morals and themes of light sure Are. (getting blinded by what's in front of you, you fail to see what's around you. distinction between what you think you want and what you need.)

Lights that are projected from inward vs outward is also a vagueeeee theme that I could speak on but already too long lol 🤷 but tldr natural/articial, inside/outside both iterations on the same theme of losing yourself (in alienation, in other people, failing to meaningfully sit with yourself and being awash in insecurity). House 2022 rly said dont you hate commodity fetishism.

[revchainsaw]

Nausicaa and the Valley of the Wind (1984)

Prayers and Salutations Cult Members! I am your mysterious minister Reverend Chainsaw and this is another nights revival service at the Cult Film Tent Revival. I bring you a special word tonight. Tonight's word is about a person who roamed the earth, in a time where people were backward and warlike. A leader emerged into a kingdom full of eschatological expectation. This leader came preaching peace, and was killed for the sins of the world, but was resurrected. In that resurrection a new hope was brought to the planet, and true healing through the power of love in the face of violence is made possible. I am talking of course about Princess Nausicaa from the Valley of the Wind.

The Message

Nausicaa and the Valley of the Wind is the film that put studio Ghibli and Hayoa Miyazaki on the map. No animated feature this grandiose and epic had been achieved by 1984, as much as Disney may beg to differ. The tale may be simple, and it may feel super 80s to us today, but Nausicaa is a masterpiece, and the fact that Howl's Moving Castle is brought up alongside Princess Mononoke and Spirited Away more often than Nausicaa is a farce and a tragedy.

The film takes place on a fantastic planet that seems to have suffered the ravages of an apocalyptic war. A war that involved gigantic warriors with powers so devastating they about made the entire planet inhospitable if not uninhabitable; save for a few areas. The fall out of this ancient war has left the earth in a state of repair, where the natural processes of a planet healing has creating giant toxic jungles.

Beyond these jungles lie two imperialistic factions, they seem almost to be city-states but it's not terribly clear. The Kingdom of Tolmekia, a militaristic proto-fascist society of almost Spartan sensibilities. Tolmekia is governed by the ambitious and cynical Princess Kushana, But I like to call her Furiosa. Just like Furiosa, Kushana is physically missing parts of herself, a visual metaphor for her metaphysical lacking and the parts of her humanity she has cut away. Kushana's world view is one of fear, a fear that can only be quelled by waging a genocidal campaign against her enemies.

Speaking of enemies, the Athens to Tolmekias Sparta would be the Pejite Kingdom. The Pejites might like to view themselves as simply responding to Tolmekian aggression, but the narrative of the film, and the story told quite visibly on the body of Kushana, is quite different. The Pejites are just as bloodthirsty if not more palettable in their approach, but like the Tolmekians, they believe only their own lives have any value. And thus, in this theatre of war, a Giant Warrior from the ages before is unearthed by the Pejite Kingdom, Stolen by the Tolmekians, before the forces of nature themselves, seem to conspire to drop the Giant Warriors "egg" right into the Valley of the Wind.

The Valley of the Wind is populated like the world of Avatar the Last Airbender, that is mostly of children and the elderly. The people of the Valley have been able to remain untouched by the ravages of war and the toxic jungles of the damaged world primarily due to geographic luck that's explained in minor exposition in the film. They are ruled by a King, and they are all deeply enamored by their beloved Princess Nausicaa.

Nausicaa is a gentle soul. She is kind to animals, she is empathetic, unreasonably patient, and bears pain and grief inflicted on her out of cruelty with a saintly understanding. She really is a thinly veiled Christ figure, scratch that. There is no veil. But she's also my favorite Christ figure. She does not preach a message, as much as she tries to save everyone from their own short sighted goals. She is not perfect, she does lash out and do some fantasy sword fight murder, but she regrets her actions so deeply that it seems to have played a part in motivating her to become even more compassionate and patient with the evils of the world.

Nausicaa discovers yet another plot by the Pejites, who are afraid of the possibility of the Tolmekians awakening the Giant Warrior, to use animal cruelty to enrage a group of almost invincible giant insects known as the Ohm. By luring the Ohm into the Valley of the Wind where the Tolmekians have become an occupying force, they hope to completely wipe out everything that threatens them. The Tolmekians DO awaken the Giant Warrior and pure pandemonium ensues. Nausicaa manages to save the Baby Ohm and calm the rage of the bloodthirsty Ohm swarm, and to defeat the warlike tendencies of both the Pejites and the Tolmekians. All the while fulfilling a prophecy fortold about a messianic savior figure called the Man in Blue.

Now that you have heard the Gospel of Nausicaa, please stand to receive The Benediction.

Best Character: Half a Person

Now that I've spent the better part of this review gushing about our Lord and savior Nausicaa. I have to admit, she's at times a bit too perfect, a bit too saccharin. Even her flaw, or her one weakness and her failing to be perfect, just adds to the perfection. I can't even say she never makes mistakes cuz she made one, and that's infuriating. It's even more infuriating that I still think she's a great character. Normally this kind of thing really kills a hero. Most Chosen Ones are the most boring and least likeable characters in their narratives. I don't know how Nausicaa avoids this trap, but she does. I'll have to do some meditating on that.

However, just like in your typical Chosen One fantasy narrative, the hero is a lot less fun than the villain. I'm going to say the best character in Nausicaa is Kushana. I want to be like Nausicaa, but I don't understand her. She's almost alien, even though we learn all about her. Kushana is mysterious, secretive, and enigmatic, yet I understand her. She barely has an arc, she doesn't really change. She's cold and cynical to the bone, but I don't need to see much of her situation to completely understand why she is the way she is. I usually hate totalitarian bad guys, but Kushana I like. Sue Me.

Also fun fact, did you that Nausicaa means 'Sinker of Ships'. That's kinda fun.

Best Scene: Spoiled for Choice

I'm going to be lazy and say take your pick. There is really not a bad seen in this movie. If the action isn't going, then there's intriguing dialogue. If there's no dialogue then you may be about to get hit with a forceful burst of whimsy. There's horror, there's swordfights and aerial dogfights. The only thing in Nausicaa I don't like to see, is the bloody tortured Ohm Baby. It's like a god damned Sarah Mclachlan commercial.

Best Creature: Foxy Shazam!

The Ohm are so simplistic yet so detailed. The number of eyes is alien, but the way they are used is expertly expressive. Who'd think you could get me to love what basically amounts to a silverfish with the intensity that I love a kitten. How did Miyazaki pull an Okja with a creature that should be haunting our dreams? I don't know.

And what about the Giant Warrior! If you are an Evangelion fan then you probably already know that Hideaki Anno designed and animated the melting goopy biomechanical beast. Surely a sight that would make both H.R. Giger and Clive Barker giddy with excitement. Just the image of the silhouettes marching amidst the desolation of the old world is burned into my brain.

So which of these is the best creature from Ghibli's first outing? It's fucking Teto. It was always gonna be Teto you idiot. Just look at Teto, he's adorable. He's too cute to exist. I'm so alone. I need a pet.

Best Character Design: Tolmekian Regalia

I originally included this category to talk some about Kushana, however, at that time I also thought I was going to say Nausicaa was the best character. I thought hard about deleting it, but I think it's a different category and you can't accuse me of playing favorites because my favorite character is clearly Teto. Just to keep it simple. It's the two costume shift from full military regalia in white and gold, to the one metal arm, warrior princess get up. It's a great costume and a great look. Get on this shit cosplay nerds. It's great for Cons in Canada, you have to think about layers, and you can't keep going as Mr. Plow. It's lazy.

Best Excuse to Talk About Patrick Stewart's Character: Lord Yupa

I just realized that I was about to write this whole review without talking about Lord Yupa. Lord Yupa is a sword saint and all around badass I think a lot of entertainment, especially in the west is lacking bad ass old men. Lord Yupa particularly shines in the early half of the film as a warrior and as a wise council to Nausicaa. If she's Jesus then Yupa is John the Baptist. He is also voiced by the elegant and eloquent Patrick Stewart. He also comes with 2 chocobos!

Worst Character: For Whom Asbel Tolls

This might also be the worst actor category as well. Actual Cannibal (haha meme) and actual monster (haha real life) Shia Labeouf doesn't so much act in the role as he read the lines and it was recorded. The good news it doesn't effect the film too much because Asbel is completely forgettable. He is a catalyst to some of the action, but besides that I don't really care for him.

Worst Aspect: To Be Fair ...

It would be unfair to completely ignore anything negative about Nausicaa. I have already mentioned in many places that there are some pretty corny, or pretty predictable tropes to this movie. But what I can't capture in words is exactly why it feels fresh when it's done in this movie. I suppose that's what makes it good. It's just so good that it's weak points are lifted up by it's strengths. Some people may bored of Nausicaa's unyielding goodness, or that she very rarely chooses to take action as much as she chases and pleads with her surroundings, but I mean, she does pay for that eventually. It's a fantasy story and it hits a lot of timeless themes that have been hit in stories for as long as human beings have been telling stories. Some people may feel that it doesn't do enough to stand out.

Summary

I have defined the S tier for myself as "near perfect and personal favorite" films. I like to think that Nausicaa and the Valley of the Wind is near perfect. Some may say that it looks like it might just be a personal favorite. In the case of Nausicaa, I'm having a very hard time telling the difference. I think it would be overly simple to claim that Nausicaa is just an ancient archetypal heroes journey with an 80s anime coat of paint. I think it's doing quite a few new and interesting things with that formula, those things are just playing out all around that narrative as opposed to being at it's center. For a first full length outing by the studio, you can really see Miyazaki's heart and the values he holds close to. I'll repeat myself so that we are completely clear on the matter. I think Nausicaa and the Valley of the Wind is a near perfect movie.

Overall Grade: S

[blushingallthewayhome052013]

Cruel Summer is absolutely

GENIUS.

here are my reasons according to the lyrics (I think they’re right?):

Fever dream high

In the quiet of the night

You know that I caught it (oh yeah, you're right, I want it)

she dreams of him in the middle of the night- especially during those quiet moments where he fills her thoughts. The “fever” she refers to are all the side effects of falling in love .... something that she’s kinda afraid to succumb to again. Especially when she feels all this so soon.

Bad, bad boys

Shiny toy with a price

You know that I bought it (oh yeah, you're right, I want it)

I think here she is saying that he’s too good to be true. He’s a “shiny toy” meaning that his appearance is too good to have a bangin’ personality too. But of course, she can’t help but buy into this and fall in love, “you know that I bought it”. ALSO whenever she refers to him and says “you’re right” it kind of radiates that confidence she introduces us to in Gorgeous.

Killing me slow, out the window

I'm always waiting for you to be waiting below

This love is killing her because it’s bringing out alllll her inner romantic feels. Longing for him out the window? Check. Waiting for him to be waiting below her window? Check. She wants him to be going out of his way to see her and long for her by surprising.

Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes

THIS LINE IS SO CLEVER. It honestly took me a while to figure it out but I think it means that devils (aka players) play games when it comes to love making it feel fake and angels (aka serious contenders) roll their eyes at these games and are all in when they love someone.

What doesn't kill me makes me want you more

She’s all in. When you love someone you bring out an inner vulnerability that has the potential to kill you if it ends. So al these things that make her happy makes her want him more but also the passion involved that feels like it could break but doesn’t.

And it's new

The shape of your body, it's blue

Of course, this love is new. I think the blue metaphor is fascinating here. It could mean SO MANY THINGS. Like what is her significance with blue?? Is it the color of his eyes that makes his body radiate that color or something? LIKE WHAT IS IT TAYLOR I NEED TO KNOW.

The feeling I've got

And it's ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

It’s a cruel summer cause she’s still nervous to fall in love. I friggin’ love this play on the phrase “summer romance”. It’s funny too because people called my relationship a summer romance the first summer we dated cause we were in high school and look at us now! Married!! Hahaha take that!! Okay I got off track. But yeah, the feeling is all about passion and seeing if that passion can last and be a positive thing that won’t burn out.

It's cool

That's what I tell 'em, no rules

In breakable Heaven but

I freaking love these too. Okay, playin’ it cool. There’s no rules right? If I don’t make rules regarding what “this” even is then I can’t get hurt right? That’s the vibe I feel with that lyric. With the “breakable Heaven” (GENIUS) she’s referring to this love being absolutely Heaven to her, but it’s still breakable. It’s not concrete to her yet. It’s still a fragile love but damn it’s got some potential to be flipping amazing and greater than anything that exists on Earth (aka Heaven).

Ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

With you

Repeat Cruel Summer explanation here :)

Hang your head low

In the glow of the vending machine

I'm not dying (oh yeah, you're right, I want it)

Even when he’s getting some snickers from the vending machine he looks hot af and the fluorescent lights makes him glow (another angelic quality I may add) how the heck can that cringe light make someone glow?? Now that’s love. But again she reiterates “I’m not dying”. She refuses to let herself fall too hard, but it seems like that isn’t possible anymore.

We say that we'll just screw it up in these trying times

It seems like lover boy is feeling some of the same feelings? The fame might be too much for an actual love to exist. Of course this ends up being possible and so worth it and UGH I LOVE LOVE :,)

We're not trying (oh yeah, you're right, I want it)

We’re not “trying” because they’re still refusing to actually say that they’re in love and be in a relationship.

So cut the headlights

Summer's a knife

I'm always waiting for you

Just to cut to the bone

This one is tricky. I want to say the “cut the headlights” means that she’s giving in. Cut the headlights and let’s be in love and kiss and all that good stuff. But then she goes back to “Summer’s a knife” (beautiful imagery omg) saying that this summer could cut her to the bone (aka wound her heart) if this ends up falling apart.

Devils roll the dice

Angels roll their eyes

And if I bleed

You'll be the last to know

She’s trying to keep it cool here. It’s so coy, like “my poker face is so good you’ll never know my true feelings”. So if he does in fact end up hurting her, he’ll never know. She wants to build a rock wall around her emotions so she can’t get hurt.

Oh, it's new

The shape of your body, it's blue

The feeling I've got

And it's ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

It's cool

That's what I tell 'em, no rules

In breakable Heaven but

Ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

With you

I'm drunk in the back of the car

And I cried like a baby coming home from the bar (oh)

Said, "I'm fine", but it wasn't true

THIS BRIDGE. This bridge is where all her true emotions come out. It’s like the end of summer where all this has bubbled up and a little alcohol makes it explode and her poker face breaks down. Crazy how alcohol works like that! But again she’s trying to regain that poker face by saying she’s “fine”.

I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you

So she doesn’t want to keep it secret that they’re in love. I mean not to the public kind of secret, but secret to him that she loves him. Make sense?

And I, snuck in through the garden gate

Every night that summer just to seal my fate (oh)

Ahhhh the allusion. Love that. The forbodden garden. Like Adam and Even- temptation. She walked into her temptation by creating a relationship with him and falling head over heels in love with him and THAT’S what sealed her fate. Giving in to a love that was impossible to forget.

And I screamed, "For whatever it's worth"

"I love you, ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?"

He looks up, grinning like a devil

This part is freaking precious. She confesses this monstrous secret that she loves him and he just looks up grinning like an idiot like “yeah, I know. I love you too”. PRECIOUS. And the devil bit I think is just about how his smile gives off this radiance of playfulness.

It's new

The shape of your body, it's blue

The feeling I've got

And it's ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

It's cool

That's what I tell 'em, no rules

In breakable Heaven but

Ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

With you

I'm drunk in the back of the car

And I cried like a baby coming home from the bar (oh)

Said, "I'm fine", but it wasn't true

I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you

And I, snuck in through the garden gate

Every night that summer just to seal my fate (oh)

And I screamed, "For whatever it's worth"

"I love you, ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?"

Reiterating the bridge? Brilliant. It so deserves to be sung twice!!

Now, this is how I interrupt it. Idk if it’s right, but that’s why I love this song soooo much. It’s so unique and open to interpretation. Love that Taylor !!!!

Also, this album is the soundtrack to this newly married woman’s life and I LOVE(R) it! So many bops. So many emotions. It basically radiates all sorts of shades of pastels :,)

@taylorswift

@taylornation