#also it's very sweet that he volunteered to sing it out of his range so that Kim wouldn't have to sing out of hers I adore him | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

noirbriar · 3 years

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FFXV AU: The Lion, the Coeurl and the Cub (6)

Someone wants a fight with Cor. I told you guys this was indulgent. BUT, there’s a reasoning for this twist I swear (at least my 1am self does).

PART 1 PART 2 PART 3 PART 4 PART 5

(possible crossover of FF lores ahead in this AU.)

- After making sure the Kingsglaive in Galahd are battle ready to protect the people, the Galahadians sends them off with a small dinner celebration as a small reprieve from the madness. If anything, they seem excited to find their goddess amongst them once more once they figure out their purpose in Galahd.(“Our festivals are full of light and people souls are bright! With the Kingsglaive back, the daemons will not dare!”)

Ignis has never really been out of Lucis since his move from Tenebrae as a child.The new burst of sounds and culture makes him curious as the dinner goes on.

- Nyx and Cor amongst the people watching the people coo over Prompto (they gave them garlands and a sashes of galahd ribbons, to show they are welcome as family of their tribesman, especially Prompto now that he is seen as Etro’s beloved Farseer ). And he will be hard pressed to deny that the domesticity was absolutely sweet.

Luna singing and dancing and thriving in life and joy among people, something denied to her for so very long. Noctis and Gladio trying to enjoy everything while not being too focused on the food. Ardyn in the corner being strangely subdued as he immerses himself in the feeling of festivity. Regis deep in discussion with Clan leaders and Clarus partaking in simple efforts in reconnecting with the common folk.There is hope it seems for a better future he thinks.

- When they finally depart Galahd’s shores, they are re-energised to focus on strategy.When Prompto suddenly makes a request. He remembers that Gladio has already taken his trial with Gilgamesh (despite Clarus’s violent disagreement initially, that was certainly a trip that Ignis won’t be forgetting anytime soon.The old shield proved that even with one arm he is still a force to be reckoned with.)

A land full of restless souls and one undead shield, he wishes they will answer her call, and seems almost rude to pull them into a battle to the death without asking. That’s just how Prompto is. Ardyn surprisingly volunteers, and after much discussion, Noctis, Gladio and Libertus are tasked to follow the ancient King on this errand.

“Reuniting with an old acquaintance!How splendid, isn’t it, my dear nephews?I, personally, can’t wait!”

(Noctis must finally face the music, and try to get along as Regis visibly tries to rein in his cringe.)

- Costlemark seems like daunting to take on with so little preparation.But they figured with Regis’ and Prompto’s magic and range, along with Cor and Nyx’s speed, Clarus’ strength(bless the Shields,they certainly Iive up to their name and and duty) while Ignis and Luna acting as support seem sufficient. (“We can also practice your new abilities while we are at it!”Luna beams at Prompto, who needs to get a hang of his new arsenal of spells.Luna looks delighted with her project.Good for her.Less so for sweet, dear, Prompto.)

-While waiting to arrive at their destination, the crew splits up for some personal time. Always a stickler for details (in Noctis’ words), Ignis seeks out Cor to relay some reports from the Insomnia Army, but stops when he realised Prompto and Cor are having a chat.At least, he thought it was Prompto.

-“Your Grace.”

”How did you know?”Etro smiles, her Eyes bright.Cor doesn’t give her an answer.

“Cor Leonis. I never thanked you for saving Prompto. You did well.”

”I would have done it with or without fate.It was only right.”

”Yet you have no idea how many times I have tried for this result.”

Ignis doesn’t like the implication.

Silence befalls between them.

“Magic may not have remained in your bloodline any longer from one of my incarnations…but you became a guardian to your kingdom and your loved ones as your forebears once did with all the fierceness and heart you bear.I am impressed. Descendant of sorceress and knight, you are a worthy protector indeed.”

“I thank you for the kind words.” Cor does not acknowledge her revelation.At least not outwardly.

“As thanks,I shall gift you a premonition.A fair warning.When you reach the tower of my old castle… an old acquaintance awaits, he wishes to have a reunion with familiar blood.”

And with that Etro leaves, letting Cor catch Prompto as he collapsed. He was…asleep?

-Ignis seems stuck in revealing himself eavesdropping or helping his friend until he notices Nyx in the corner ( wait, when was he there? ), and gestures the advisor kindly to turn and leave.The report can wait a little longer.

-The advisor remembered how he had went to look up on Prompto’s file after seeing Noct hanging around this new classmate so much.It was his job.Yet he found a locked citizen file and made an enquiry to The King and Marshal which earned him a chuckle from his majesty and a sigh from the Immortal.Before he was dismissed with the order to not worry and they are aware.

”Let the boys live a little.” He should have known something was off there and then.A terrible oversight. But not a mistake. Prompto have proven to be one of the sweetest person to grace them, always thoughtful and keeping Noctis grounded but in a positive way. As Gladio liked to say “a walking sunshine”.

-( Ignis will never find out that Regis had laughed in Cor’s face after they heard the boys were up to something innocent and stupid, told him it was what he got for removing the sweet innocent babies from their playdate so early on and never bringing ‘Pompom’ around for the prince anymore.New friends meant making trouble together and teen friends are much more troublesome compared to baby friends by Regis’ logic .“If only they had grown up together!Oh!The shame!Shame!””…”)

- They part ways after dropping the group off at the ruined tower, with plans to reconvene at Costlemark later.The last time they were here, they found a Jabberwock and the lost royal arm but soon after Prompto begun to have seizures…possibly from reacting to what’s under the tower now they think about it.

-After gruelling puzzle solving and clearing the path of daemons, they reached the end where Regis seems awed by the old magitek for Solheim.(“Certainly an amazing tower!Bar the residents of course…Although I half expected a beast to great us,””There was one, your Majesty.””Ah.Pity we had missed the party then.””…”)

-It was dead end.At least until Prompto made a round and gathers energy in his palm.

”Get back!”

The rest obeys the heads up as he tosses the spell into the ground.Ultima certainly is destructive, but achieves its purpose as a room of dim crystals greats them amongst some ruins and arches.

”Wokay, I nearly overdid it there, I think? Well…time to get to work!”Prompto hops down and reaches for the dim crystals and begun his rite in absorbing Etro’s power. Everyone else stays on guard and wait. Until Nyx realises something.

-“Hey…how are we getting out later? Our elevator has…poofed.”This has everyone’s attention. Except Regis, he shrugs and figure they can probably warp his way up.Probably?That was the idea…until the room began to quake.

(“That wasn’t me right??””Focus Prompto!”)

A roar.

(“Oh dear, there really is a beast in this tower-”“Regis.With all due respect.Shut the fuck up.”)

And they hear a voice.

-“Who disturbs her rest?Who dares claim what is left of her brokenness lost in Time?”

-“It is Etro herself who seeks what is hers! Would you grant us mercy?” Dear Luna, blessed Luna, tries and pacify whoever had made the demand.There would be no reply for a long while.

-“You speak the truth.Very well.I will grant you passage but-“ of course there’s a catch.”-I ask you to indulge me.”

”What do you seek?”Regis asks.

“A contest, of strength! I see amongst you…A knight?No you are neither…the blood diluted and long gone.Her incarnation has left nothing I see, even in another time.But nevertheless, a familiar soul since time immemorial.Will you, guardian, take my challenge?”

The hair on Ignis’ neck stands, he knows who that is. Etro’s warning ringing in his mind.

-“Do you swear to provide us passage to safety regardless?”

”Certainly.On my honour as Guardian.”

“Cor!No!”Clarus hisses, this is like 30 years ago all over again damn it.

“Cor, yes.”The Marshall readjusts his katanas.

(Ignis simply gives in and pinches the bridge of his nose here.This has Prompto written all over.)

Regis and Clarus turns to Nyx in exasperation.

-Their Captain simply offers his Kukris up to his husband.

”Stay sharp.”

”I will.”

And in the corner of their eyes an archway glows, the sign is obvious. Cor strides forward without another word, while his two old friends sputters and hurry after their wayward brother.Nyx follows closely behind, because his charges are all reckless.Luna gestures for Ignis to follow, and that they will catch up since Prompto is done with his rite, just needing to gather himself together abit.

He is hesitant but obliges.He trusts Luna’s judgement.

- Beyond the arch, was a different dimension, the atmosphere feels different.Its as if they are on the top of the tower in its original form in another time, amongst the stormy sky and clouds.The smell of ozone thick and unnatural. There was no one.

“Show yourself.” Cor calls out and a large shadow emerges and lands before them, rears back and r o a r s.

- Ignis will pay all the crowns and gil he has for Noctis and Gladio to see the gobsmacked faces of their fathers now.

After he finishes his own inner conundrum that is.

A dark feline creature with a white mane and crimson crown with bladed feathery wings. The power it exudes is putting his senses on edge.This is no ordinary monster.Neither divine nor evil.

-“Will you not grant me your name, beast?” Cor and the creature begin to circle each other, calculating their foe.

“I have no name.I am but one who grieves for what is lost…yes…I believe in what’s left of my memory, they had once called me…Griever.”

The legendary beast then lunges and Cor strikes. The Trial of the Guardian has begun.

-----

*Side note: Um, Surprise? PART 7

13 notes · View notes

apriorisea · 3 years

Note

Ok I’m seriously convinced you’re secretly one of the members...(Joonie is that u???) loool but for real, you write their personalities so well. So not a request, but a question?? Their “concepts” aside (like, “golden maknae etc”)... key personality traits & flaws for each of the boys? Like “passionate, sensitive, a perfectionist, or overly self-critical, etc” Which member(s) is hardest to write?Hope this made sense, I’m just super interested in your take on this :)

--First off, you’re so nice!!! Thank you so much:) And also, thank you for this question! I love things like this---even though it’s obviously all just my personal speculation 😅I listed my thoughts down below, but I would love to hear any thoughts (whether in agreement or disagreement!) anyone else might have! As for which member is hardest to write, for me I typically struggle a little more with Taehyung and Hoseok. For Taehyung, I think it’s probably because our personalities are pretty opposite (again, HUGE grain of salt, since I don’t *actually* know any of them in real life, so I’m just going off the little info we have), so it takes me a little longer to write his stuff. For Hoseok, I think it’s because there is so much more to him than meets the eye and his personality is difficult for me to pin down sometimes.

Again, thanks so much for your sweet words and thought-provoking requestion (it’s a word now)! I hope you find my take interesting! 💕💜

Seokjin:

Conscientious - I think Kim Seokjin is very, VERY aware of his role in any given setting. He knows what’s expected of him and how to do it without bending any of his personal boundaries/rules.

Private - I firmly believe that we will never know the true personality of our Mr. Worldwide Handsome. I think he decided early on that to survive in this life, he was going to have to separate his stage persona from his personal life---and he guards this separation fiercely. This is also one of the qualities I admire the most about him: his unwavering commitment to keeping pieces of himself just for him. My personal opinion is that he is the member that gave up the most of a “normal” life and, while he did so knowing the consequences of this choice, he’s found ways to “rebel” and keep his own autonomy (think: responding to fans in a very “blunt” manner [Marry me? No.], cutting/coloring his hair against company wishes, refusing to give-in to fan-service he is uncomfortable with [thinking specifically of that one time the host tried to get him to kiss Taehyung and he just started yelling over them when they tried to insist], his penchant for avoiding overly ~revealing~ outfits, etc etc).

Professional - I mean, just a continuation of both of the points above. He always knows when the cameras are watching and how he should act accordingly. But---and this is important---I am in NO WAY saying he’s being fake or disingenuous. The Jin we see on stage, in MVs, RunBTS, and even Bon Voyage/In The Soop is the real Jin---it’s just not all of him. He chose the Idol Life as his career, as a profession, so he would never be caught violating the terms that he himself has set to fulfill his responsibilities. What little we know of his family leads me to believe that he was groomed from a young age how to navigate high society and the professional world; now it’s just a slightly different world and society he floats through.

Responsible - He takes the job of eldest brother very seriously. Though the baby in much of his younger life, as soon as he got 6 little brothers he stepped effortlessly into his new role. Making them food, driving them to school, helping them feel at home in a new place, providing silent but tangible support... My personal favorite is the way he willingly makes a fool of himself to relax the others, to help them calm down during stressful situations and break the ice.

Good memory - I want to be careful how I explain this, because I don’t want it to come out wrong. I think Kim Seokjin has a very good memory. If you were decent to him and his brothers during the hard times, he’ll remember that going forward. If you were cruel to or dismissive of him as a young exchange student abroad, he’ll never forget. However, I also think he’s cunning enough that you would never be able to tell which category you fall under unless he wants you to know.

Hard-worker - I mean, just the endless amounts of anecdotes we have about him practicing his vocals and choreography all night long should be enough evidence for this point, but I still sometimes feel like he doesn’t get enough credit. We all know the story of how he got placed in BTS, but I don’t think people appreciate how damn hard he has worked to grow into this life. He was a college student, set on a completely different life with completely different expectations, scooped off the street and told to learn to sing and dance and look. at. him. now. Listen to that vocal range, look at the Black Swan choreography or the way he seamlessly joined the dance break of ON---he has worked HARD and I don’t think we should forget about this. Just because something doesn’t come easy to you, if you’re not naturally gifted, it doesn’t mean you can’t work to achieve it.

Basically I just love Kim Seokjin with my whole heart.

Yoongi:

Empathetic - This word is the beginning and end of how I would describe his entire being. I think Min Yoongi is a very empathetic person. He sits back and observes, and he’s aware of everything. You know when you first get into BTS, there’s always the stories of him being the “scariest” member or the “toughest” or the quietest (especially in the earlier days of BTS, because can we just talk about how much happier he has been this last year-year.5?? How much more himself he is at all times? How much more comfortable??? We love to see it.) But I think his quiet watchfulness just gets frequently mistaken for scary or tough. In addition, his empathy allows him to connect with others in a special way, to acknowledge them and build them up (thinking of that one V-Live or whatever where Jungkook says something kind of under his breath---something about a past life?---and Yoongi not only hears him but turns to him and explicitly validates his feelings and thoughts, OR the times when he tells Jimin that he really likes his singing voice).

Protective - He doesn’t like unkindness in any way, shape, or form. He doesn’t tolerate cruelty or bullying. And let’s not forget: he sees everything. Every slight, every intentional dismissal, every dig or jab, every “diss track” lyrics. Every single injustice. Now, he can stand up for himself (when he deems it appropriate, because I also think he’s pretty good at picking battles), but his true force comes out when those he loves are belittled/threatened/disrespected. He is fiercely protective of those he loves.

Emotionally Intelligent - Obviously, I think he’s also just intelligent-intelligent, but I want to focus on this aspect for a moment, because I think this is a quality that gets overlooked in people in general. He is aware of the importance of emotions, both his own and other people’s. It’s in the way he recognized that he and Taehyung were polar opposites and made a concentrated effort to understand him better. It’s in the way he unabashedly announces that they hold hands when they’re arguing. It’s in the way that he insists that there is more to life than school, grades, others’ expectations. It’s also in the way he knows exactly how to make the others laugh, the way one of his sharp-witted comments or physical-comedy bits can break a tension or diffuse the moment. It’s all over every single one of his songs. It’s in the way he calmly handles challenges and has a unique relationship with each of his brothers according to their needs. He treats his relationships---with the members, the fans, staff, friends, family, whoever---with care and respect and maturity.

Compassionate (read also: Cinnamon Roll) - Yoongi understands darkness because he has experienced it himself, and he will do whatever he can to make sure no on else suffers in the same way. He takes care of the people in his life, usually by doing little things or quiet things (think: the reason they call him the “dad” of BTS). He’s not afraid to correct people when they’re wrong, but he always manages to do it kindly. He’s also a complete pushover for the ones he loves: think of how he each member of the maknae line has a different but special relationship with him, think of how Jungkook can basically crawl all over him and hit him and annoy him and bother him and he never bats an eye, think of the way he showed up with chicken because he didn’t want Hoseok to be alone, think of the way he goes fishing with Jin because he knows his big bro loves it so much, think of the way he never ever yells at anyone when he’s angry, think of the way he softens his tone when explaining things. Cinnamon. Roll.

Straight-forward - He’s blessed with the ability to be blunt but not cruel. I actually personally really hate the word “blunt” because, in my experience, it usually comes into play when someone is explaining that their rude, offensive, and ignorant comment *isn’t* rude, offensive, or ignorant---they’re “just a blunt person.” But I think Yoongi is someone who is actually able to be straight-forward (a much better term than the dreaded b-word) without slipping into carelessness. He says things how they are, but, using his emotional awareness and intelligence, he’s able to say it calmly and kindly. If you’ve messed up, he’s going to tell you you messed up---but he’s also going to help you figure out the next steps and volunteer to walk with you while you take them. He’s going to call out bad behavior---but always remind you that he loves you no matter what. He’s going to critique the song you wrote---but it’s going to be 90% positive comments and 10% suggestions of what could be better/smoother/more understandable. I also feel like he is someone who expects the same in return: he hates liars and has a low tolerance for bullshit.

Basically I just love Min Yoongi with my whole heart.

Hoseok:

Duality - Now, I don’t mean duality in the way you can compare his precious ray-of-sunshine moments to the times he absolutely blows everyone away on stage (though this is obviously a thing). I’m referring more to the way he can be both ray of sunshine and serious-business all at the same time. Like Jin, I think Hoseok chose an Idol persona (though I think his decision was prompted more by a desire to be uplifting and cheerful and our hope) and exists comfortably within those parameters. However, unlike Jin, I think Hoseok doesn’t mind if people see the other side sometimes, too. He’s not afraid to set down the bubbly-Hobi persona, even if cameras are rolling. He’s not afraid to be emotional, whether that’s over-the-top happiness, or genuine overwhelmed tears. He can wear a flower around his face and make cute noises and then the next second he can snap at the maknae to not fool around near a pool so he doesn’t get his clothes all wet. It’s not an act either way, he’s just both.

Good judgment - Obviously, we know that Jung Hoseok is a hard-worker. We know he’s dedicated his life to his craft, first with dancing and then with rapping. He can be an intimidating dance captain, someone who takes it seriously and pushes everyone to be the very best they can be. His work ethic is insane, and he never accepts less than his best---but, in comparison to others on this list, I think he is able to critique himself fairly and kindly. While he demands perfection, he doesn’t tear himself apart to find it. I think he has the ability to assess something or someone and come away with a fairly unbiased opinion.

Comfortable - This is hard to describe in just a word, but I think he has a way of making people feel at ease in his presence. Even as one of the biggest superstars on the planet right now, you get the sense that he never wants to make people feel uncomfortable or intimidated or uneasy. Something about his mannerisms, his bright smile, his personableness, make him seem approachable. I think it’s also why Namjoon’s been known to say that BTS couldn’t exist without Hoseok, why Yoongi values his friendship so much, why Jungkook is constantly snuggling him. My personal opinion is that he was instrumental in bridging the gap that sometimes might have occurred between Namjoon and Yoongi in the early days; his comfortable presence eased some of the tension that (I’m guessing) may have naturally arisen between two of the greatest young rappers in the game when they were first working together. Hoseok just wants everyone to feel comfortable and at ease around him.

Kind - I think Jung Hoseok is just a genuinely kind human being. I think he is trusting and loyal, but also just the sort of person who will make it his mission to make you smile on a bad day. Just the fact that he chose to make his stage persona someone who is full of hope and happiness speaks volumes. Knowing his own personal struggles, he extrapolates this knowledge to guess how others could feel, and throws himself into the role of positive, happy, sunshiney, hope. It’s his kindness that motivates this behavior.

High standards - This goes along with his good judgment, but I think Hoseok expects a certain level of competence from everyone around him, in whatever capacity they’re working. Again, this goes along with his desire to have the entire group work on a bit of choreo until it’s right. I think that, because he pushes himself to be the best and fulfill expectations, he looks for this same dedication in others (what comes to mind is that moment in some interview where Namjoon is struggling a little [cos English is the WORST, ugh] so Hoseok looks over at the interpreter like “what exactly are you doing, do your job, help him translate”).

Basically I just love Jung Hoseok with my whole heart.

Namjoon:

Unbelievably intelligent - I know this one isn’t exactly shocking, but I still feel like it needs to be mentioned first and appreciated more. Namjoon is crazy intelligent, academically speaking. He thrives on the pursuit of knowledge, on contemplating and discussing higher concepts, on learning new things that feed his curiosity and his soul. While I also think this crazy-high intellect can sometimes hinder his ability to connect emotionally with people, it’s also this exact quality that makes him so well suited for the role he has been thrust into---not just in the group, but in the world.

Nerdy - Bicycling, bonsai trees, reading, tiny creatures, art exhibits. He is unabashedly and desperately passionate about the things he likes. He isn’t afraid to love something just because he loves it. He goes all-in on things that he’s interested in, whether they’re “cool” or not. His curiosity pushes him forward, needling him to learn everything he can about things he’s passionate about. He sinks himself into these hobbies wholly (think: carrying a book or two with him everywhere so he can get some reading in, visiting as many art museums and exhibits as possible on days off, making cutesy noises at stingrays and scooping teeny-tiny crabs out of the sand to tell them how beautiful they are).

Macro-focused - He strikes me very much as the sort of person who loves to talk about concepts and ideas and philosophies in great terms. He loves clever wordplay, he likes to reflect on his place in the universe, he wants to discuss the complexities of life and human nature. His quick-mind devours these topics, and I can imagine he could sit for hours with you debating philosophy and discussing art. On the flip side, though, I think he isn’t so good with minutiae---and by “minutiae” I mean everything from being more aware of his physical surroundings to dealing with personal things. For example, I think he’s brilliant when he discusses happiness and hardship and joy and pain and love and humanity in the songs he writes...... but he’s not exactly the first person you would go to if you were having a tough or emotional personal time. Don’t get me wrong: obviously he cares about the people in his life, he cares about people in general---but sometimes all you need is a hug and pat on the back to encourage you and Namjoon would instead launch into the greater implications and consequences of human nature in an attempt to help you feel better.

Logical - I know this seems like a given, but while I think others on this list are more emotionally-intelligent, I think logic is one of Namjoon’s greatest strengths. For example: if another member is crying or upset, Jimin would notice they’re upset and immediately go and hug them and wipe their tears away; Namjoon would notice they’re upset and immediately look for the source of the problem. Once identified, he’d take the next steps to rectifying the problem, because logic dictates that if the problem gets solved, then the other member would be happier. If there was nothing to rectify, he’d attempt to comfort them with cold, hard facts. (I’m thinking about that time when Jungkook got upset because he felt like he messed up his performances, and Jimin immediately hugs him and comforts him and tells him he was great, while Namjoon assesses the situation and starts talking about how he himself actually, objectively messed up, so there’s no logical reason for Jungkook to be upset right now.) He dreams and enjoys literature and the arts---but when it comes to handling practical, inter-personal issues, he’s much more comfortable with logic.

Vibes - I really didn’t have a good word to describe this thought of mine, so let me just get right into explaining: I think Namjoon is, generally speaking, one of the smartest people---if not the smartest person---in the room. He’s aware of this fact without being arrogant about it, but it is the truth. Because of this, I think he’s frequently called on to explain things, to expound on them, to teach or interpret or decipher. I think he enjoys this role, because he loves talking about things he’s passionate about (see above: nerdy) but sometimes...sometimes I think he just desperately wants someone he can vibe with. Someone who can match his level intellectually. Someone whom he doesn’t have to teach. I think he is over-the-moon ecstatic when he meets someone he can vibe with in any way---whether that’s intelligence-related or passion/hobby-related. I don’t know, I just sometimes feel like he chooses to spend his personal time with people who can match him in some way, whom he can vibe with.

Basically I just love Kim Namjoon with my whole heart.

Jimin:

Caring - For me, Park Jimin starts and ends with this characteristic. He cares. A lot. About a lot of things. He cares about his brothers, he cares about his family, he cares about his friends, he cares about ARMY, he cares about music, he cares about his dancing, he cares about fashion, he cares about how he’s perceived, he cares about doing his very best, he cares about the future generations, he cares about those who are less fortunate than him, he just cares so much. Along with Yoongi, I think he is incredibly empathetic. How many times do we see him basically sprint across a room or a sandy beach or a campsite or a stage to get to an upset member? He reads people’s emotions and has a natural instinct to take care of them. Like anything, though, I think his biggest strength can also be a great weakness: sometimes he cares too much. How many times has he worked until his body is covered with pain patches, until his feet bled, until he almost passed out? All the weight he lost, because he cared about his appearance? How hard he worked at being “hardcore, manly” Jimin, because that’s what he thought people cared about most? All the times he cried after a tiny mistake, because he cared about being perfect, because he cared about others’ perception of him? Park Jimin cares so/too much and it’s one of the most defining things about his personality.

Social Intelligence/눈치 - One thing I love the most is how he has such a unique relationship with each one of his brothers. Now, obviously, every single combo in Bangtan is different and unique and special. But I love watching Jimin’s relationships with the others so much, because he’s so aware of what they need. Truthfully, I think Jimin is hyper aware of others in general. If you’re trying to sneaky-cry at a crowded party, Jimin is the type of person who would somehow appear at your side, ready to help you feel better. His empathy and sensitivity allow him to assess what each individual needs the most from him and act accordingly. He knows Taehyung should never be left alone when upset, knows that if Jungkook is actually crying then something is very wrong, knows that Leader RM sometimes needs to just be his one-year-older hyung Namjoon, knows exactly how far he can push Yoongi’s buttons, knows to laugh at Jin’s dad-jokes (especially when they’re for the benefit of the group), and knows that Hoseok needs to be reminded how much cohesiveness he provides the group in general.

Self-Critical - All right, I feel like this one might be a little controversial, so hear me out. Like I mentioned earlier, he cares a lot, and part of that translates into caring about himself---caring about his achievements, his performance, his appearance. It’s partly the classical dancer in him and partly just his personality. He wants to do and be his best always. But.... I do think that he has learned to be much kinder to himself over the years. Gone are the days of starving himself to get rid of his cheeks, the tearful breakdowns after a single missed step in a performance, the acting outside of his true personality because he thinks that’s what he’s supposed to be. I think we now very much see a Jimin who has come into his own, who has accepted himself for who he is (including his flaws), who has embraced every part of him. This doesn’t mean that I think he never has to fight the nagging voice in his head, or struggle with insecurities, or swallow down the urge to berate himself after a less-than-perfect performance---he still expects the best out of himself, still wants to be the best. I just think he’s found a way to critique himself without absolutely tearing himself apart.

Cunning - Yet another word that looks and sounds derogatory, but isn’t really in this context. Like a lot of other empathetic, sensitive, socially-intelligent people, knowing exactly what people need and are feeling also allows him to know weaknesses. Weaknesses he would never exploit---unless he wanted to. I actually don’t think we see much of him using others’ weaknesses against them, but in my opinion, this quality is linked to two of his other quirks: 1) his talent and complete lack of guilt for cheating at games and 2) his penchant for pettiness. I don’t really know how to explain my thought-process here---not well, anyway. But I feel like Jimin is so tuned into the important things (so concerned about the important things) that little things, like cheating at a game, don’t matter to him much. And, if he can use his usually sweet and helpful and hard-working, honest self to get away with it, even better. On the flip side, I don’t think he enjoys or endures confrontation as much or as well as, say, Yoongi might---so he expresses himself in a quieter, underhanded way. (The moment that’s coming to mind is that one time they were at an American event and he commented, in Korean, about how unorganized things seem to be.) Jimin is the sweetest, most sensitive, empathetic little cinnamon roll---until it’s time to win a game, or until he’s feeling a little prickly and petty.

Basically I just love Park Jimin with my whole heart.

Taehyung:

Individualistic - Kim Taehyung knows who he is. He knows what he likes, what he wants, what he thinks. He is going to wear whatever he wants, paint whatever he wants, say whatever he wants, and do whatever he wants. He’s a person who seems to have figured out a long time ago what makes him happy and how to be his true self around others no matter what---and this something I greatly envy. If he wants to learn the violin, he’s gonna buy a violin and play some scratchy Twinkle Twinkle Little Star on a hotel balcony---because that’s what he wants to do. If he wants to write a song, it’s going to be in his style, the way he likes it. If he wants a really cool, avant-garde piece of artsy clothing, he’s going to spray-paint it himself. If he has an opinion on something, it’s highly likely that he’s spent quite a bit of time forming this opinion---but once that’s his opinion, that’s his opinion. That’s what he thinks, there’s no need to listen to others or change. I think this quality, this ability to be himself so freely and earnestly, is both one of the reasons he’s able to make friends so easily and be beloved so quickly (see: “Bangtan’s True Baby” and “Wooga Squad darling”); and one of the reasons others (including the other members, by their own admission) can’t understand him well at first. I think it has brought many good things to his life, but has also played a significant part in some of the struggles that he has had. He’s precious, but also very easily misunderstood.

Not Very Outward-Sensing - Notice I very purposefully don’t go anywhere near the words “self-absorbed” or “self-centered”---because he’s not. On the contrary, I think Taehyung feels very deeply for the people in his life (see below: Emotional), but his ability to care for them is sometimes inhibited by his lack of outward-sensing. If Jimin is the king of 눈치/social awareness, then Taehyung is the absolute opposite (which is why it is unendingly intriguing to me that two of his closest relationships in BTS---he and Jimin, he and Yoongi---are comprised of one person who lacks this awareness [Tae] and one person who has all the awareness [Jimin, Yoongi]). He would never hurt someone’s feelings on purpose, but quite often he’s just not paying a whole lot of attention to what other people might be feeling or experiencing. He’s not concerned about walking on eggshells, because he feels that as long as his intentions are good, nobody can be too hurt or too uncomfortable with him or his behavior (A great example of this is the infamous Spring Day Dance Debate from “Burn the Stage.” In Taehyung’s mind, he saw something that should be changed and needed to be addressed, so he called it out. It never in a million years would occur to him that the way he phrased it or the way he kept harping on it could be a source of irritation or discomfort to Jin. To him, it was a very black-and-white, clear-cut situation: something was wrong, he had an idea of how it should be fixed, therefore nothing bad could/should come of him speaking his mind in the pursuit of this perfect solution he created). He seems like the sort of person who, after accidentally hurting your feelings, would sympathize with your hurt and want to make it better, but focus more on the fact that he didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, so it’s not really his fault.

Emotional - I think he is very in-touch with his emotions, which can be both a good thing and a bad thing. For example, if he’s upset, he wants everyone to know and acknowledge that he’s upset. He doesn’t like feeling ignored or passed over, and where others might let it slide, he’s not afraid to speak up about it (I’m thinking about the time there was a question directed specifically to Yoongi about being from Daegu and Taehyung immediately pointed out that he was also from Daegu, and kind of pouted a little until it was acknowledged). Also, although it’s never been said explicitly, I think he is one of the members who potentially struggles with depression. He can take things very personally and to heart. But this is likely because he has such a big heart. He loves unabashedly and he’s very vocal about who he loves---think of all the times he’s said and posted comments along the lines of “Please love all seven” and “Please love each of us equally.” He also can be very protective (thinking of that one Weverse post where he lowkey chewed somebody out for posting an unflattering photo of one of the others) and blunt when defending those he loves. I mean, he created a whole new word just to express how much he loves ARMY! When he’s sad, he cries. When he’s happy, he giggles. When he’s angry, he expresses it. When he’s disappointed, he doesn’t hide it. To me, he is a near-perfect example of someone who wears their heart on their sleeves.

Contradictory - One of his most endearing qualities. He is not very outward-focused---but he bought a pair of gloves because he remembered that Jimin offhandedly mentioned that he needed some. He doesn’t read other people easily---but he (so far) is also pretty darn good at completing accurate Vibe-Checks for those who come in contact with BTS. He doesn’t always see as much as the others might---but he also notices certain things they might miss. The beauty of his being is that he can be both things at the same time and not seem out of place.

Basically I just love Kim Taehyung with my whole heart.

Jungkook:

Confident Yet Perfectionistic - Now listen: when I say confident, I don’t mean that he never struggles with insecurities. I mean confident in the way that his whole life (at least his whole Idol life) he had 6 older brothers who encouraged him to try and do anything he wanted---and then supported him no matter the outcome. Being raised in an environment like that, where you’re encouraged to try things, where you have people who love you constantly praising your efforts and providing a safe space for you to fail, you gain a certain amount of confidence in your abilities, in yourself. I think this is actually a big part of the Golden Maknae moniker: yes, I think he is the type of person to whom things may come quite easily and who is naturally skilled in several areas---but it’s also a little easier to conquer new things when you have years of encouraged-successes under your belt. He has gained a confidence in himself over years of trying and working his tail off and eventually succeeding; he knows he can do anything if he works at it enough because he’s always been able to do everything he works at. Where the perfectionistic aspect kicks in especially is this: there are a lot of people who have a natural affinity for lots of things. There are lots of people who can pick up something new and be decent right away (I honestly think Taehyung is another person like this, someone who can pick new things up pretty easily)---the difference is that Jeon Jungkook is the type of person who takes that natural affinity and runs with it. He’s not satisfied with just being good at something; if it’s something he really wants to do, he throws his whole heart and soul and self into it. In my opinion, this sets him apart from people who could be considered “Jack of All Trades, Master of None.” He trusts his process and uses it to be the very best he can be in whatever he does.

Introverted - Obviously he’s not the only introverted member of Bangtan, but I do think that his specific life experiences require a little more discussion on this topic than the others. By his own admission, his childhood ended really early. He didn’t focus much on school because he was focused on his career; he never got to have the typical high school experiences most of the others had. At an incredibly young age he was thrust into a totally different life that required being in the spotlight---and while this definitely brought unique challenges, he loves his life as a musician and performer. I think out of all BTS, Jungkook especially lives for performing. He lights up on stage and is at his absolute happiest when performing (and performing well). And yet none of this changes the fact that he is absolutely an introvert, someone who needs to recharge with just a little alone time. Alone time. Not easy to achieve when you live in the same tiny dorm with 6 other boys. Not easy to achieve when you are constantly surrounded by brothers, staff, instructors, producers, cameras, and fans.

Maknae - I can’t explain this well, I know I can’t, but it just is such a huge part of him that I feel like I need to try. In so many ways, Jungkook is a typical baby of the family. It’s evident in the way that he unabashedly idolizes his Rap-Mon-hyung. In the way he constantly cuddles and sniffs and snuggles Hoseok. In the way he’s not afraid to pester Yoongi or tease Seokjin. He also seems like someone who is much more of a fixer than a listener; meaning, if you go to him with a problem, he’s going to be focused on how he can fix the situation, not on just listening and sympathizing/empathizing with you, a trait that I feel comes easily to babies of families (not that *all* youngest children have this, mind you) because they’re typically not the ones confided in, so if something is brought to them they want to help make it right (massive generalization, I know, don’t kill me). As discussed above, he’s also confident in himself because he’s been raised with older siblings who have always told him “yes, you can.” He’s just Baby in all the ways that stick with a person even as they grow older.

Trusting - Jungkook strikes me as the sort of person who trusts fairly easily---and, more importantly, unshakably. He has no problem admitting to millions of ARMY that he ripped his pants on stage or V-Living while drunk (I don’t care what he says, babyboy was at least a little buzzed) because he trusts us. He could easily follow Namjoon (or any of his brothers) to the ends of the earth. He takes every opportunity to speak earnestly and wholeheartedly about how much he genuinely loves ARMY, because he trusts that that love will be returned.

Basically I just love Jeon Jungkook with my whole heart.

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elenamegan14 · 4 years

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Twisted Wonderland: Headcanons for Dorm Haunted Houses Pt.6 - Scarabia

MASTERLIST

Part 5

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THE ATTRACTION:

You wanna see one dorm that goes all out this year? Look no further. Scarabia spared no expenses on making their haunted house looking so EXTRA fine.

I mean, we’re talking about real gold, jewels, and high definition special effects. Oh, and yeah, Jamil and Kalim made a lot of effort to make those bodies look REAL.

Scarabia’s haunted house is an Arabian “Cave of Wonders” that leads to a wondrous treasure fault. Legend said it housed a wishing lamp that grants wishes upon its rightful owner. Many had attempted to get the fabled lamp, but those who entered would never come out again. All those who came perished by the traps… or by its guardian itself.

Merchandises were also made - they got the usual keychains, t-shirts, and even plushies of Kalim and Jamil in their Haunted House outfit. Most of Kalim’s dolls have nearly sold out, which irritates Jamil a bit.

They got an auction to get the replica of the wishing lamp - it was sold for 993,000 madols.

When the guests and students first enter the house, what greets them is the sight of a gigantic blue tiger. Jamil and Kalim made it so that the giant tiger head’s eyes could move around and made an illusion with the sand that it could move around as well. They can see blood and corpses littering across the cave entrance. A booming, intimidating voice rang through the gates...

“ONLY ONE MAY ENTER, THE DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH.”

As they entered through the dark and wet cave, the guests and students could see the horrible fates of the tomb robbers. Some are pinned by spikes, some are squashed by rocks and some even got gobbled up by bugs, mummies, and even the monstrous stone statues of snake guardians itself.

At times, they were scared off by mummies coming out of their coffins, enraged stone statues, and snake guardians slithering out of every hole on the walls, popping as they pleased. MC’s group were wary of every crack and holes and jumpy at every noise.

They even have an interactive game inside, where they can get small prizes if they win. The game is to put all the jewels evenly within the scales guarded by monstrous stone lizards and snakes. If they won, they got the prize. If not… well, even if it’s not real, they will fire blue flames at the people. It cost 5 madols to play the game.

Kalim. Sweet precious sunshine Kalim is dressed as a genie. A cute turban rested on top of his head. “Isn't this cool?! I heard that the Sorcerer of the Sand used to have a genie who does his bidding, so I decided to become the genie itself!” Oh, KALIM.

Like, Kalim is VERY popular with the kids and girls. Why wouldn’t he? Compared to the other scary actors, Kalim is very friendly, immediately drops his character when it gets too intense for the audience, and even helps a lost, crying kid to his parents back. WHAT A SWEETIE.

Yet, he was scolded by Jamil to get back to his post and character, “There is a reason WHY we have a scream counter!”

Of course, Jamil IS the NAGA. And he was scarily GORGEOUS. Scaly red, black, and gold scales adorned his face, his arms, and his chest. Gold pieces of jewelry with rainbow-colored gems adorned every single bit of his body, making him impossibly alluring. A red veil closed half of the bottom of his face. MC swears that their heart skipped a beat when they saw him - to the point that they almost got distracted when Jamil hypnotized them.

It’s not only MC. Almost everyone with a naga-fetish kink immediately got lured by Jamil. They don’t care - LET THE SCALEY BASTARD CRUSH THEM WITH THEIR TAIL.

Ah, but Jamil did not also want to seduce them. The purpose of a haunted house is to SCARE the pants off them, so once he managed to get his victims into his arms… he will reveal his “true” form by extending his jaw like a snake.

Jamil bragged that he might scare most of the kids… but he got more girls (and a few boys) approaching him than Kalim did. Even if they worked together, Jamil’s competitive streak with Kalim never ends. //sighs

He’s also responsible for scaring most of the guests and students. Jamil will jump out of nowhere, hissing in close-up and sometimes touching people straight on their shoulders then slithers off. It was creepy.

But as they went deeper to the caves, they noticed that it became more gold and glittery. The guests then went through the treasure vault, where mountains of gold coins, jewels, and even expensive diamonds littered all across the floors and walls.

Oh, and all those things were real too. (“Kalim, when I said to fill in with gold coins, I didn’t mean for it to be real. People are going to steal it.”)

Of course, some of the opportunistic guests and students tried to steal it.

Which is why Jamil made counter magic so that any guest who tried to touch it would receive a mild electric shock, and for all the poor schmuck students to trigger the traps if they touched the treasure to protect El-Asim's fortune.

They even put a sign that says: “Warning! Please do not touch it! You’ll be sorry!”

The main centerpiece of Scarabia’s Haunted House is the back chamber where the lamp is hosted. On the center of a beautiful gazebo filled with calm blue colors, lies a golden lamp encrusted with colorful jewels placed inside a plush, velvet pillow. Next to it, there was a snake statue holding a bloody, giant ruby. DO NOT TOUCH IT AT ALL COST.

Otherwise, Jamil will slither right at you.

Jamil is there, with a giant hourglass, hissing and scaring everyone yet making all the ‘monster lovers’ feel flustered.

Sometimes he can be seen eating a screaming scare actor, his jaws are wide and splattered with blood, guts everywhere it’s just sausage and ketchup.

Once the hourglass reached the end, the cave was lit up with red lights and flames came bursting out almost near the guests and students.

Poor MC got a part of their hair singed when they almost came too close.

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THE MISSION:

Kalim, the guide, is more than happy enough to relay the mission: inside this “Cave of Wonders” is a lamp, which is guarded by the vicious vizier-turned-naga, who greedily tried to covet the lamp for himself only to fall to its curse instead. The charm is inside the lamp, and students must survive the cave of wonders to get to the center of the haunted dorm itself.

To get to the lamp chamber, the students must solve one of the “interactive games” set up for them to get a piece of the puzzle that would open the chamber itself. It was guarded by stone snakes that would eliminate you if you failed to complete it within a limited time. They were given three tries before the statues threw them outside to enter again.

The students were told that they can’t touch any treasures except for the charm itself. If they do… well, there’s no guarantee they can get out of the cave itself “alive”.

Also, Kalim warned them that if they ever encountered a naga, do not look into their eyes or they’ll hypnotize you to walk straight into their jail or a trap.

They have set up the atmosphere to be glamorous - all jewels and stuff, but when a student foolishly falls into the temptation of stealing a bit of real jewelry, he is immediately caught in a trap: getting pinned on the wall with knives, swords, etc. Don’t worry, he lives.

He did beg to be let go though.

The weeping did not help. Everyone almost felt sorry for him, but… THE CHARMS!

Actually, that guy served as an example. The students never thought that they WILL become part of the attraction for the guests if they fail.

Soon after, more people are falling into traps - turns out, touching the treasures isn’t the only way to set it off - Kalim and Jamil make sure that there are hidden buttons and puzzles that would trigger each different trap.

So now there are many students who are crushed by oversized styrofoam boulders, stuck inside a mummy casket with a terrifying mummy corpse prop, falls into a trap door, nearly impaled by spikes (they have no idea how Ace got into one, but HE’S FINE), being put to sleep by darts loaded with chloroform, buried underneath a glass case filled with black bugs (Jamil’s idea), and many more that you can think of.

During the commotion, one of the charms from MC fell off. A student saw it on the ground, shining brightly. He grinned deviously, fingers twiddling to reach the charm.

“Heh, heh! Today is my lucky day-” He got vibe-checked by the styrofoam/wood Pendulum of Doom(™) out of nowhere.

As if it’s not enough, Jamil appears out of nowhere to scare the victims before dragging them off course, putting them inside the “Cage of Shame”.

It’s just a jailbox filled with failed students being put outside the haunted house, becoming an attraction for the passersby. They have to be content being laughed at than to go through the haunted house again.

MC’s group found an interactive game. It took them at least two tries to get it - Ace, Deuce, and Grimm are responsible for most of the failures, the dumbasses - but Jack unexpectedly solved it. Everyone’s jaws had dropped.

“What? This is just a simple scale game. I learned it from my sibling’s video game before.” Jack retorted. It was a children’s math education game.

After they escaped from more traps, avoid TOUCHING THE GOLD AND JEWELS (“Would it kill you to lay off from the treasure?!” Epel slapped Deuce, Ace and Grimm’s hands so hard that it throbbed) and put the puzzle to open the chamber, they finally saw the lamp.

Here’s another thing that the guide told them: to get the lamp, they have to watch out from triggering more traps - the platforms are fragile, so there’s a chance they could fall into the water if they do not tread the platforms carefully. Also, please avoid the GIANT RUBY as it will trigger the Naga Guardian to be summoned in place.

Epel, being athletic, volunteered to get the lamp.

He managed to avoid the pitfalls, the stones, and even falling spikes. He managed to reach the lamp and get it… except for one problem.

See, that giant Ruby is too much to bear. People want it - in fact, it’s so shiny and red… Ace is drooling. Counting how much he can sell on his head.

But Grimm, being Grimm, falls into one final temptation. That giant jewel on the snake statue - SO UNBEARINGLY BLOOD RED, AND HUGE, AND ASKING TO BE TOUCHED- congrats Grimm, you’ve become Abu.

Jamil came out immediately, all scaly and terrifying. He grabbed the screaming Grimm like a ragdoll.

“INFIDELSSSSSS!!!!” Jamil hissed, “You have touched the forbidden treasure! Come as you may rescue your little friend, but you’ll never see the light of the day... again!”

The Guardian Naga then puts Grimm in a freaking large hourglass, stating that once the last sand falls, they will all be eliminated.

Where the hell did they get a giant hourglass? Who knows, they have a flying Racoon to save. GDI, Grimm.

The only way to save Grimm is to steal the key on Jamil’s neck that would open a hatch for Grimm to escape. Ace, Epel, and Jack are in charge of attacking and distracting Jamil. Meanwhile, Deuce will deal with getting the key. MC is told to stay the sidelines to guard ALL the charms (“You’re important to us, kantokusei!” Deuce yelled, avoiding Jamil’s tail. It made MC blushed a bit.)

As Deuce was about to reach the key, Jamil noticed his presence and threw the poor guy right at the attacking trio like a pinball bowling. Jamil then slithered towards the frightened MC.

Now you see here, Jamil felt he had gone EXTRA mile to make himself monstrously appealing to MC. He does have an interest in them after they defied him when he last Overblotted, so he took this chance to - ahem! - “impress them”.

“It’s just you and me, Dorm Leader...” Jamil coaxed, using his hypnotizing Unique Magic again, grabbing MC’s chin. “Just relax and… trussssssst in me.” Jamil’s eye seemed to glow as he coaxed MC into his arms.

MC struggled hard, but they also took this chance to grab a hold of Jamil’s key and pushed him away, much to his surprise.

They throw the key to the recording Ace, getting Grimm out of the hourglass hatch with barely a moment to spare. Afterward, they immediately book it, leaving behind a grumbled Jamil…

...but not before he gave a final hiss and a lick to MC. They got flustered - the rest of the group weren’t happy. Ace gave Jamil a middle finger before he left.

So they got a few close calls with the trap, Ace immediately went after Grimm to try and struggle the furball with Grimm only defending himself that the giant ruby calls out to him - don’t tell me you guys don’t feel it too! As usual, these idiots denied it.

Kalim went after them, congratulating on completing the challenge and getting the charm. "Did you guys like it??? Did you have fun?? =D"

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t the best question because it’s their turn trying to get Kalim for putting the REAL jewels and GOLD COINS as a set trap. What was he thinking?

And then Epel gets depressed. He sighs a lot as they went onto the next haunted house. They only realized it a while later after they got curious at Epel’s sudden demeanor - Epel came from Pomefiore dorm. AND THEIR HAUNTED HOUSE IS NEXT.

Just like Epel’s immediate annoyance, the smell of aromatic perfumes, iron, and sounds of fangirl squealing echoed as the Pomefiore’s Haunted Dorm looms ahead...

Part 7

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the-bottom-of-the-abyss · 3 years

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A Playlist on Paradoxical Love

This is a true story about the abuse I suffered from a past relationship that I wrote for a college class. I feel that sharing may help me but also others in identifying abuse and/or helping others heal.

I have no idea if anyone will ever read this but it was so, so hard to write but in the end, getting my feelings out in one place seemed to help

HUGE TRIGGER WARNINGS: nongraphic sexual assault, mentions of rape, mentions of suicide, emotional abuse, gaslighting, manipulation, coercion, self deprecation

The Night We Met

The Night We Met by Lord Huron; This was our song, one that we thought was of love and fortune, but turned out to be of love and regret. The lyrics rang truer the longer we were together.

It was a warm and sunny day when she first met him. He was a new student from California, coming to her small town in West Virginia and happened to be in the percussion section with her in band. His voice caused butterflies to make a home in her young heart, igniting a spark she had not felt in the fifteen years she had been alive. He made her feel like she was something to want, always listening when others would not.

The week she met him other members of the band were going to a Drum Corps International show in Pittsburgh. Seeing it as an opportunity to get to know one another, the girl volunteered her mother to drive the girl and boy.

Her mother obliged, picking them up from the school parking lot and listened to the conversation being had in the backseat. The boy told the girl of a family full of abuse and an absence of love. The young girl felt her heart grow heavier with each story he recounted. He told her about his stepmother clawing his face, leaving the scar beneath his left eye. She wanted nothing but to heal the pain he held in his heart, to absorb all the hurt he felt.

By the end of the night, he had asked her to be his girlfriend to her delight. After dropping the boy off at his house, her mother turned to look at her with knowing eyes. She didn’t want her daughter hanging out with the boy; he was only trouble. The girl did not listen, deciding that her mother didn’t understand him. She wasn’t there when he made her laugh or looked at her like she hung the stars.

Her adamancy to be with him only grew. As a gift celebrating one month of being together, he gave her a box of things that reminded him of her. Inside, there were the type of mechanical pencils she liked with the thin lead she insisted on using. He picked out colored pens, knowing her obsession with collecting them and also put in scented hand sanitizer, knowing that she was running out of the bottle attached to her purse. To top it off there was a king size Kit-Kat bar, her favorite candy. The girl had never received a gift so thoughtful from anyone. No one had ever spent the time to curate something just for her.

He swept her off her feet and she couldn’t have been more infatuated.

***

Sometimes I look back to that girl and wonder how she didn’t see the danger. I was naïve then, so young and unafraid of the world. Other times I know her naivety wasn’t her fault. How was I supposed to know that the person that told me they loved me would become a monster?

His words were like honey, always promising to give me the world and more, appealing to my doe-eyed view of his love. He would listen to my ramblings and musings about life that most people I knew avoided for the sake of saving time. His touches were soft and gentle in a way I could have only dreamed of. I couldn’t have known that those sweet words would turn to phrases that felt like poison, subtle when spoken but deadly when left to linger. I couldn’t have known that the same ears that listened to me would become the same that ignored my pleas for him to hear what I was saying and not twist my words. I couldn’t have known that those hands that held mine would become the same that forced me to please him after I told him no.

My mother was right and in typical teenager fashion, I ignored her advice.

Tennessee Whiskey

Tennessee Whiskey by Chris Stapleton; We went to Tennessee but in addition to that, the lyrics of the song spoke to how warm and cared for he made me feel.

The sun-kissed days of summer gently rolled into the cool, crisp season of fall. While the breeze strengthened day by day, so did their relationship. She swore she had never been so happy, standing tall by his side, feeling like a goddess in his cornflower blue gaze. When it was announced the band would be traveling to Nashville, she excitedly waited for the day for the charter buses to arrive in the cracked parking lot of her school.

October had granted them a clear day for departure, and she sat in the seat next to him, watching mountains she grew up in turn to flat plains of the Midwest. The bus was loud, filled with gleeful voices of their peers, but talking to him made it fade into the background.

She suggested taking a small nap, to help pass the hours of driving straight ahead. He declined, explaining he was an insomniac, and told her to rest without him. The girl convinced him to lay on her lap and decided to sing softly to him, as he did tell her once she had the voice of an angel. Somber tones of “The A Team” by Ed Sheeran floated from her to him for an hour before his breathing evened out.

The first day in Athens of the South flew by, taken up by the bone-tired exhaustion of the long trip and unpacking. On their second day, she dressed in her jazz band uniform, preparing for their recording in Studio B. The boy complimented her red blouse and dress pants as she stepped out of the hotel elevator, making her blush. She thought the uniform was unflattering and too formal to be worthy of his praise.

After the recording, the boy hugged her and told her how good she did and how proud he was. Proud. Someone was proud of her, of her performance. People had told her that she had talent and extended their compliments but none of it meant as much as his.

When the trip ended, she was woeful wishing for more time to escape any commitments back in her hometown. She reminded herself that there was always the Friday night lights that graced their football field and the memories it would bring. The girl was so excited to spend those nights on the field with the boy. The band would dive into the halftime show and afterwards, she could show him what a pepperoni roll was.

*** I sometimes look at pictures I still have from the trip to Nashville. I looked so happy and sure of myself. I thought of myself as a true grown-up back then, not knowing what the future would bring. He was so good to me, and even though there were signs here and there, nothing stood out as dangerous. There was no blaring siren, screeching to evacuate before the ship went down. We had only been dating a few months then, but he told me he felt like he knew my soul from a past life. He knocked on the door to my heart, and I opened it without a second thought, believing every promise he made.

I’m Your Puppet

I’m Your Puppet by Gregory and The Hawk; the lyrics “and I’ll undress, if you need it. But please don’t need it” is an accurate way to tell how fucked up my psyche was after this.

They were on the way home from a friend’s graduation party; it was exuberant, a great celebration of their mutual friend. The boy asked the girl if she wanted to pull over somewhere and fool around. It wasn’t even close to being the first time they had been together like that; they were actually each other’s first times. She was a little reluctant, hesitating to do anything that may land her in trouble. He told her that everything would be fine, so she relented, and the car pulled behind a small row of storage containers.

They both climbed in the backseat. A kiss was shared between the two, only lasting a few seconds before the boy pulled away from the girl’s shining lips.

“Can you give me a blowjob?” He asked her, looking with pleading eyes. “I don’t really want to,” she said, evading his piercing gaze, “I’m not really feeling it.” His face twisted, showing his disapproval at her response. “Come on, you never want to.

What happened to the girl who said she’d always be down to do stuff like this?” “No,” she told him, “I don’t want to.” The girl only had done it a few times, but she had almost thrown up once, and she didn’t want a repeat of that. She hoped that refusing again would make him stop asking.

He rolled his eyes and scoffed, “This is what you do when you’re in a relationship.” The girl went to object but didn’t get the chance. He opened the door and got out of the car, pulling her with him so they were standing in the gravel.

“I don’t want to,” the girl said, feeling panic rise, “let’s just have sex instead.”

“It won’t take very long,” he urged with a forceful edge that made her insides twist. With that, he put pressure on her shoulder to have her sink to her knees.

He said it wouldn’t take very long but it felt like eons to her. The rocks in the gravel pushed into the skin on her knees and that’s what she focused on. If she focused only on the pain, maybe everything else would cease to exist. She knew the boy saw tears rolling down her cheeks and heard the small, muffled sobs that escaped her. He only looked at her with lust, not giving a damn about how she was terrified, how he was making her feel.

After he finished, he pulled her up off the rocks, and helped her back in the car. Only once she felt the leather below her did she begin to full out sob. Instead of the harsh figure from moments before, she was met with the boy she knew, the one who loved her.

He pulled the girl into his lap and rocked her as she cried. “Shh,” he cooed. “I’m so sorry, I never should have done that. Please forgive me.” The girl nodded and buried her face in the crook of his neck, letting herself be calmed by his soothing voice. “We don’t have to do anything else,” he said.

To prove to him that she forgave him, she shook her head. “No, it’s fine,” she sniffled, “I’m fine.”

Once it was over, they drove home in complete silence.

***

That day still haunts me. It wasn’t the first time he had coerced me into something. It was far from the last, but it was the one time he legitimately forced me to do something I didn’t want to do and acknowledge it.

I blocked it out for a long time, trying to go on with life as normal. I only realized how wrong it was when I talked to a friend of mine who went through something similar. Even then, I brushed it off and told myself he didn’t mean it. It took even longer for me to see it as sexual assault. I still only remember the overview of what happened, the rest is somewhere in my mind, somewhere that it can’t hurt me. The one thing I remember is the gravel on my knees. The indents I saw when I got home that afternoon were the only things showing that it had truly happened.

This point marked when he knew he could manipulate me. I was so scared of doing something wrong, of disappointing people, disappointing him. At the notion I was beginning to become something he didn’t like, I tried my hardest to become what he said he needed.

If I think about what happened too much, I feel sick, like I need to take a scalding shower and scrub the memory out of existence.

Poison

Poison by Sofia Mills; This song brought me back to the hazy feeling of being high out of my mind and believing my person was the one pushing the drugs into my hands.

She had never gotten high before. The boy once told her he would never touch a drug, but that statement faded into explanations about how he wanted to live life. She was wary, weed was very different from the nicotine they both let swirl in their lungs. He told her for two months about how great it was until she agreed to try. She lied to her parents; the couple had been dating for a little over a year, but the girl’s parents still tried to limit their time together. Instead, she told them it would be a few of her friends from band sleeping over and that the boy wouldn’t be there.

The smoke burned in her chest; it left a distinct aftertaste she wouldn’t forget. Everything was fine until her body started to reject the hazy feeling trying to overtake her. She got sick, a feeling she absolutely loathed. Her friends gave her water and she sat curled in a ball on a chair outside, shivering as the high feeling started to crescendo. The boy stayed outside and told her she’d be okay. He grabbed a wet washcloth and dabbed her clothes before cleaning the hair framing her face. It was in that moment that she only thought of him.

No one else would ever do this for me, she thought. He loves me more than anyone ever has. I am so lucky.

*** That wasn’t the last time I got high. We would smoke at our friend’s house every weekend, spending lazy evenings in each other’s’ arms. That night in particular, I felt so special that someone other than my own mother would clean me up after getting sick and later help me feebly crawl up the stairs.

Wrong Direction

Wrong Direction by Hailee Steinfield; the lyrics “Every time you burn me down, don’t know how, for a moment, it felt like heaven” kind of explains what it was like when looking back on abusive relationships. Back then, the moment of the apology felt like a huge act of love, but now it’s obvious it was just an empty promise.

She had just gotten off a shift at work and got into his car, the clock showing a time around ten at night. The girl already told him that she felt too tired to do anything, but she would be alright for just cuddling before he drove her home. He nodded and drove across the street to the abandoned K-Mart and parked in the middle of the barren lot.

They got in the backseat and she leaned her head on his shoulder and told him about a tough customer she had to deal with. The boy listened to her and waited until her rant flickered into silence.

“Are you sure you don’t want to do anything?”

“Yeah,” she replied, “I’m so exhausted, I’ve been on my feet all day and worked an eight- hour shift.”

“Come on,” he urged, “we never do anything anymore.” She felt exhaustion seeping into her bones, and for the first time, didn’t give in, “No, I am too tired, I want to go home and sleep.”

Instead of agreeing she should get some sleep, he shrugged her head off his shoulder. She tried to reach for his arm, but he yanked it away from her and harshly rolled his eyes. “Babe?” She asked, not fully understanding what was happening.

The boy ignored her concerned gaze and opened the backseat door, loudly slamming it shut before getting into the driver’s seat. The girl took it as her cue to get into the passenger’s side. As he started the car, she once again reached for his hand that rested on the gear shift. Without looking in her direction, he moved his hand to the steering wheel, so quickly that it seemed as though her touch burned him. A permanent scowl took resident on his face and she tried again to talk to him.

“Babe? Please talk to me,” she pleaded, feeling the dread crawl into her throat. With no response, tears started to fall. The road to her house felt so much longer, filled with continuous pleas for him to talk to her, to say anything.

“I’m sorry,” she sobbed, “I was just really tired. I’m really sorry, please forgive me.” There was no mistaking the sorrow in her voice, the boy knew she was crying, even if he refused to look.

He pulled into her driveway, looking straight ahead as she gathered her coat and purse. Before getting out she tried to lean over to kiss him, but he leaned away.

“I’m sorry,” she repeated before getting out, “I love you.” To her surprise, he didn’t respond. When she shut the door, he immediately backed out, leaving her tear-stained and feeling helpless.

When the boy apologized to her the next day, she forgave him immediately.

***

I have read that emotional abusers utilize the silent treatment because of how effective it is. After refusing him, the stonewalling struck me at my core, my worst fear coming true: becoming something he didn’t want anymore. I never stood my ground again after that. When he would want sex after that night, it would go one of two ways. I would still say no about ten times before he pulled a line that made me so full of guilt that I did what he wanted, or I promised “next time.”

In My Veins

In My Veins by Andrew Belle; This song really emphasizes the pain of the hole that is left when someone with such a stable place in your life. It feels like all that is left is their ghost.

“I don’t think we should be together anymore, Emily.” “What? What are you even talking about?” “I just need to find myself.” “What the fuck does that even mean? How can you just leave? I love you, please, we can work it out.”

“I’m sorry, I just think it’s for the best.”

*** The first time we broke up was over the phone while I was on a weekend vacation. It came after I kept pushing him to apply to college since he was going to be graduating later that year. I calculated what it would cost for him to live off minimum wage while paying rent and he got so angry. He broke up with me because he was getting annoyed with my insistence on going to college or a technical school. He hated when I got on him to not skip school or to stop smoking so much weed. He made me feel like I was so awful for trying to help him succeed. No one has ever made me feel like a burden in the way he did.

A week after, he came to my house and told me that he didn’t realize what he had until it was gone and I ultimately took him back, truly believing he would change.

Terrible Love

Terrible Love by The National; this point really marked the realization that I was in a toxic cycle of what I thought was love.

It was about thirty minutes before the girl was to perform with the jazz band for a Christmas concert. She had asked the boy to come, but he said he had plans already. This wasn’t surprising considering he left early from school on her birthday to get high. The girl settled for texting him instead.

She asked him what he was up to and he replied that he didn’t want to tell her, as she would get upset. Immediately, the girl felt worry build. Thousands of possibilities fleeted across her consciousness of he was indulging in. After pleading for him to tell her, for her own sanity, he relented and told her that he was going to be doing MDMA for the first time with a mutual friend he lived with. The girl felt irritation mixed with desperation bubble up inside her. He swore he would never do anything besides smoke weed but once again, he trampled over any promises ever made.

She texted him a long paragraph about how irresponsible it was and that he could get into so much trouble. He told her how uptight she was and how she was keeping him from living his life. The girl was fed up and told him not to text her for the rest of the night. It was a justified reaction, but her anxiety only told her she was a shitty partner for not indulging him.

She was so upset, so anxious about what he was doing and how in the recent months had been throwing his life away. He had recently began insisting that he would be fine living off of her in the future until he figured out what to do. The night went on with her panic staying at a fever pitch.

The next day the girl texted her best friend, the same one he was with, and ranted about the situation, hoping that the friend would see why she was so torn up. They had the following exchange:

The girl: He even said I wasn’t going to like what you guys were going to do. Because he knew I’d be super against it. But he said it was fine and it wasn’t a big deal and that I was overreacting. I don’t think I am. I just needed someone to talk to last night because I cried and just went over in my head what the hell I could do to help him. It’s not just this. It’s all of it. He doesn’t do his homework, skips school, or leaves because he feels like it, has no motivation and no desire to do the things he needs to. When you love someone so much all you want to do is see them succeed. Idk maybe I’m just an uptight bitch and a shit person but I do know I want the best for him.

Friend: You act like I want to see him fail. I don’t, Emily. I want him to succeed just as much as you do but I also want him to live his life to the fullest. Everyone needs to have quality of life or it isn’t worth living.

The girl: I never said you wanted to. I know you want to see him succeed just as much as I do. But I know for a fact if he doesn’t get himself together, there’s not much of a life to live. It sucks but life is hard and it’s not easy. No matter who you are, it’s never going to be easy. If he doesn’t graduate high school, there’s not much he can do. Even fast-food places can only pay minimum wage without a high school diploma and to be a manager you need a high school diploma. I’m looking for his future, not the next few months. If he wants to live in an apartment, he needs money. His dad isn’t always going to give him that. To get money, a decent job is required. Minimum wage won’t be enough. And he just doesn’t care. I try to make up for it and I try and try to push him to do his homework, to study, to make good grades. But it never works.

Friend: I’m upset rn so I’m not going to respond atm. I will text you later and we can talk about it then, okay?

The girl: Okay be safe. Please don’t show him all this unless you think necessary. I don’t want him to be mad at me because it makes me feel like the shittiest person on earth when people are mad at how I feel and like I shouldn’t tell people how I feel anymore.

*** It is hard to explain the way I felt when he told me he was going to do MDMA. My reaction wasn’t due to the drug itself, but more about the stereotypical, lazy deadbeat he had become. He once tried to impress me by telling me he brought up an 8% to a 32% in an easy class.

I felt responsible for the way he was. I thought I could fix him, that I would be able to pull him out of the headspace he was in and bring him back to who he used to be. Back then, I didn’t realize he had always been that way, only getting more obvious because I never called him out on it, save for a few times.

I recently found those texts while drafting out this paper. Reading them teleports me into the headspace I once held. Back then, I believed that I needed to help him along with the small voice that told me he was right, that I was overreacting. Now I know that my reaction was justified, I should’ve held him accountable by breaking up with him on the spot. But like many times before, I didn’t. I clung on to the hope that not all was lost, there was still time.

Honey and Milk

Honey and Milk by Flower Face; there are some lyrics in this song that really frame how the end of such a toxic relationship felt like. “And the love you made me fight for was never love at all. The red light shines through the window and I’ve got a black eye for every bed you’ve made. The honey and milk on my fingertips was never enough to make you stay.”

It was mid-April, spring out in full force when she couldn’t get ahold of him. Most days, she would have chalked it up to him deciding he wasn’t in the mood to go to school, but the day before, he swore he’d be there.

Halfway through the day, she saw him approaching in the hallway. The relief that filled her didn’t last long, though.

“We got busted last night,” he told her. “What?” “Yeah, we got caught with weed in the car and I got a drug charge.” The girl shouldn’t have been so shocked, but she was. Even worse, she shouldn’t have felt relief that he was handing her a reason to leave him on a silver platter. She finally had enough of the coercion in the bedroom, his confidence that she would never leave, and feeling like a burden.

“I can’t believe this,” she stated, shaking her head. “I’ll talk to you later; I need to think.”

The girl called him later, knowing that if she saw his face, she wouldn’t go through with it. She told him that she was done. He cried for the first time over her and told her that he wanted to take his own life. He went on for hours about how he was going to kill himself without her. The girl felt guilt settle in the forefront of her mind. She told the boy it was going to be alright and comforted him, trying to keep him calm, truly believing that he would leave his blood staining her hands.

She cried for hours after hanging up the phone. But she wasn’t crying for him, she was crying for the girl she used to be. It was almost two years that he had her in his clutches, two years of playing into his twisted games.

While she did feel used and irrevocably damaged, she could finally breathe. She was free.

*** I never went back to him, but not for a lack of him trying. I got myself as far away as possible and it was the best decision I ever made.

New Person, Old Place

New Person, Old Place by Madi Diaz; I struggled for a long time for a song that captured at least something close to my real feelings. This song captures the sadness, the trauma, and the moving on. I think that it really adds to the feelings of realization of how much I sacrificed for him: “I used to take all of your shit and carry it on my back. I’d leave what I needed behind to make room for whatever you had. I believed that I had to be strong just for you, so you wouldn’t crack”

I have thought again and again what I was going to end my story with. The optimistic and empathetic part of me yearns for a happy ending. I want people to know it gets better and feel hopeful. But the much larger, aching side of me wants to tear down the mended façade I have built and scream out all the hurt.

Most days I feel that I’m made up of an alphabet soup of emotions I couldn’t even begin to decipher. In one moment, I feel okay again and understand that I didn’t deserve what happened, but it is over. The next is filled with visceral recollections of all the worst parts that reignites every antagonistic thought. It truly feels like my psyche is in a never-ending pendulum, swinging between healing and absolute and total self-destruction.

While my thoughts on the matter are contradictory from one day to another, I think I have come to a few conclusions. I know that I am not okay, and I probably won’t be for a while. I cannot lie to myself by saying the shaking in my hands that accompanies thinking back is due to the cold instead of a physical reaction to trauma. I also have come to realize that I am so fucking angry, and I am allowed to be. A lot of people say that forgiveness is the way to healing but I think that is bullshit. I will never forgive him for what he did to me. He stole my naivety from underneath me and forced me to thank him. How can you forgive something like that?

Many don’t understand why survivors stay in abusive relationships if it is so awful. The problem is that it wasn’t always bad. There were times that I felt like I was on top of the world and others where he yanked me down to hell. I believed I deserved what he did, that I wasn’t worth anything more. He made me believe he was the only one that would love me.

It’s funny how trauma works. While he assaulted my body and tortured my mind, I mislabeled it as love, as flaws that I needed to accept since he loved mine. I didn’t start to notice the way he changed me until months later. Even now, almost two years since the day I left, I’m still tormented by the aftereffects. Over the course of writing about my ordeal, I tremble for hours, physically reacting to reliving the experiences, no matter how healing it is.

Suffering from abuse at such a formative age, fifteen to seventeen, left its mark on my psyche, etched deep inside. Because of this, I want others to know how to escape and that no one is responsible for the actions of others. Even if he was abused himself, he chose to continue the cycle and use me as a scapegoat for all his problems in life. I am grateful for one thing though; I will never, ever let myself be treated like that again. I would rather be alone than suffer the way that I did.

I’ve come to terms with the fact that most stories don’t have a happy ending; instead, most end in a nameless limbo between good and bad. My story falls into that majority. Many bad things happened, and they continue to come back again and again, like a stray that only found shelter in my mind. There is still so much that haunts me daily, but I also know that it is not all bad.

My soul is still covered with the ominous clouds his presence brought but every day, more slivers of sunlight poke through, causing flowers to bloom where it was once barren. One day, a full garden will grow and take over the parts of me that he singlehandedly ripped apart. One day, I will not feel so empty about the ordeal.

One day, I will be okay again.

#Trigger warning #tw #tw abuse #tw r*pe #tw sex assault #abuse #emotional abuse #trauma #intimate partner violence #domestic abuse #gaslighting #toxic relationship #abusive relationship #actuallytraumatized #coercion

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brideofcthulhu10 · 4 years

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Behold another Lost Boys holiday special! It was between this and Valentine’s day, but honestly I love writing Christmas specials, its such a cozy time despite the high suicide rates, but lets not get into that. A BIG SHOUT OUT TO @imlostinsantacarla FOR HELPING ME EDIT MY FINAL DRAFT!

Fun Fact! My husband, David (yes, that is actually his name) actually does have the bah humbug hat I mention in the head canons. He’s a heavy metal goth so when I found it at the store I had to get it for him. And you just know if our David found that, he wouldn’t be able to resist it!

Christmas with the Boys

Alright, so the whole touchy, feely and mushy feelings that surround even the topic of Christmas time is not something any of the boys will ever openly admit to enjoying. After all, they see themselves as these bad ass brutal killers who thrive off of death instead of holding hands and caroling with the goodie goodies of this coastal town.

Yet, it's challenging for them not to get sucked into the glitz and glam of the holiday season. Everything is a big deal in Santa Carla. Dia De Los Muertos, Halloween, Thanksgiving- everything! But especially Christmas.

Christmas in Santa Carla dwarfs the frenzy craze of Halloween. The entirety of the boardwalk is decked out with red and green lights that are tightly wound around palm trees, red bulbous bows are wrapped tightly around street lamps, the reds and whites of velvety fabric swirl down the posts, creating the effect of candy canes. All the store windows are painted to appear frosted, or covered with painted snowmen whilst several rooftops are covered with white felt in which mimics the texture and sight of snow. Even the boats in the harbour are all extravagantly decorated in a sea of lights that parade around brightly at night in every color imaginable.

Between the dates of the 30th of November all the way to the 24th of December the city of Santa Carla hosts a plethora of wondrous events in it's annual Holiday Festival. Large green, white and red kiosks are erected, selling a wide range of baubles and treats, from delectable chocolate coated rice krispy Santa Clauses, elf candy apples caked in a plethora of dark chocolate and peppermint, to a variety of Holiday hats, masks and even hand made costumes by the many local artists. Even hand carved candles in wondrous scents of pine, mint, or spice.

Currently, David possesses a black fur Santa hat which he acquired on a night out that boasts the words "Bah Humbug" proudly sewn over the front. It's the only holiday attire he'll even humor. Last time Marko attempted to place reindeer antlers on his head, David had set them on fire roasting atop a pan of chestnuts. Now it's not to say that he's a grinch persay. Rather, the complex and intense emotions that come hand in hand with Christmas can leave him perpetually indifferent at best, disdainful at worst. The whole occasion leaves him displeased. After all, he was an orphan who had been almost eagerly abandoned by his hooker mother left to fend for himself from the beginning, and of course never met his father. Even she could not identify which of her many clients may have been responsible. Most of his mortal life he had lived as a street rat, barely making ends meet by picking the pockets of tourists and Santa Carla citizens oblivious to the true dangers of the lower side of town. The rich and uppity classes who often snubbed their entitled noses his way would never suspect as he lurks between alleyways, leaving them cornered at knife point. It was scarce that he ever did see a kind face in the sea of those who had little interest for anyone that was not themselves. Back then it was rather uncommon for anyone to step outside their own little lives, which led to most interactions, outside of the other boys, having been met with great hostility, thus he had learned to be just as equally hostile in turn. Even the mere thought of anyone suddenly dawning a false kindness due to a certain time of year simply agitated David. It rattled him to the very core in a way very few other things did. Why bother with the lies? Couldn't people just face the very basic fact that they weren't nearly as charitable as they often deemed themselves to be? I mean, the young man had seen firsthand a family having previously snubbed a dirty homeless man with appalled disdain at the sight of his muddied clothes and dirt stained skin, only to then begin volunteering at a soup kitchen to purge whatever guilt they carried on their conscience once the holiday season began. The whole ordeal was pitiful! Nevertheless, - more so for Paul and Marko's sakes than his own -, he did humor these traditions amongst the holiday's festivities. Ruining a good time just wasn't his style. Unless they started fucking singing.

Most traditions David could tolerate, some he even enjoyed slightly; although he would never be caught dead admitting something as embarrassing as that! However, he just couldn't stand Christmas carols! They were the bain to his immortal existence. The repetitive nature of these overly cheery jingles left him covering his ears lest they nest in his brain leaving him humming the same damn melody for weeks. This was the case because the dynamic duo of dumbasses were well aware of his hatred for Rudolph the Red Nosed fuckin' roadkill! Stupid red nosed abomination.

“OOOOOOH-,” Paul begins with cheerful mischief.

“Don’t. You. Fucking. Dare.” David seethes through tightly clenched teeth, eyes screwed shut in indignance.

Paul hesitates. He looks at Marko. Marko looks at Paul. Wicked grins of agreement spread wide like wildfire across their faces as their master plan comes into play. Full throttle. What’s more fun than annoying the shit out of David? One on the left, the other on the opposite side of the cave on the right. This was nothing but Divine perfection if you asked the two troublesome vampires.

“OOOOOH DASHING THROUGH THE SNOW!” Paul belted out at full volume.

“IN A ONE HORSE OPEN SLEIGH!” Marko followed in suit, the widest eerie grin plastered on his face.

“OVER THE HILLS WE GOOOO” Paul howled enthusiastically.

“I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU BOTH!” David's voice hit a whole new octave it had never in all his life so far. All the while Dwayne had opted to vacate the room lest he be caught in the middle of the escalating madness with Laddie in tow. He loved these guys, but not enough to dive head first into their fuckery.

Paul thrives during the Christmas holidays! How could he not? The food, the punk rock covers of Christmas songs, the absolute babes prancing around the town in Santa hats under mistletoe?! He loved it all! You can find him sneaking under mistletoe with many sweet honeys on a constant basis, regardless of whether or not he's acquainted with them. Most do roll their eyes or laugh it off, but every once in a blue moon the guy will get a little lovin' from a beach babe in the Yuletide mood. What else could he ask for? You can bet he’ll run into the woods December first, and quite literally RIP a pine tree out of the ground to bring home like a wee carrot being plucked from the ground. The bigger the better! He may even drag Dwayne or Marko along with him if it's too big for him to carry himself. And all the boozy drinks he can concoct up? This boy is in his element! Mulled wine, spiked eggnog, candy cane vodka, butterscotch bourbon hot chocolate?! Yes! David straight up refuses to try anything that Paul creates himself (remember the concoction he made in Max's kitchen? Those poor goldfish....) which is also another reason why he has Dwayne help him. Or rather, the other boys insist the most responsible of them monitors the blonde lest he poison them with some sickly brew. That, and the fact that Dwayne's the least likely out of all of them to blow up the damn kitchen!

Dwayne is indeed the designated cook during the holiday rush, albeit a field even he tends to struggle. Avoiding the kitchen catching aflame, perfecting his craft lest he blow up the stove, leaving only a pile of ash in its wake. As previously mentioned, ever since the dreadful chain of events that lead to the unfortunate destruction of Max's kitchen, this raven haired vampire has attempted his hand at learning to use a stove properly: Although he often finds himself forgetting ingredients either in the midst of cooking or after the final product is done and he's taken a big bite.

“Shit! I forgot the milk and eggs!” Dwayne grumbled with a mouthful of dry crumbs, a true disgrace of a cookie.

Paul always gives him crap for it of course.

“Oooh I just thought you were going for a sandy, dusty dry cookie kinda thing.”

"Yeah man, these taste like ass!" Marko would cough out in midst of choking.

"And what, like you dumbasses could do any better," Dwayne retorts with a huff. Only Star manages to have any manners when testing his failed baking endeavors.

"Well I mean, the taste isn't that bad. Just a little dry is all."

"At least Marko wouldn't be choking to death." David would mutter from the darkest corner of the room, a little late in the conversation.

In all honesty, Dwayne's biggest motivation when it came to improving his skills was obviously Laddie. The kid never got much of a Christmas whilst living with his mom, so now that he was with the boys, he wanted to ensure that Christmas's were something that Laddie would remember for all eternity. Though granted, it is quite the mess when he was helping in the kitchen. But when the mini vamp grins from ear to ear whilst coated in flour and rapidly stirring an overflowing bowl of chunky cookie dough--the sight is too freaking cute!

Since Laddie joined the boys, they participate in Secret Santa every single year, which definitely includes Paul bursting through the entrance of the hotel as Santa on Christmas day. We won't talk about the fact that each year he almost falls flat on his face and swears, ruining the surprise for the kid.

"Santa where are your reindeer," he'd question, to which Santa Paul scoffs

"Pff, reindeer, I don't need any fucki- Ow," cut off by a firm and covert kick to the shin from Star, Paul quickly changes his response. "Oh! Ho ho, well, you see little boy, Santa can fly too! On his, uh, uhm… magic motorcycle! Yeah, that!"

But it's okay because Laddie already KNEW (he figured it out a year or two ago after Paul's beard fell off not once, but three times), he just doesn't have the heart to tell any of them because, well Paul really gets into it. And he knows the others are playing along for his sake. But to be fair, Laddie would have to be pretty dumb to believe it was Santa. I mean, the beard Paul's wearing is hanging half off his face by this point! But anyway, just like Paul's style, the entirety of the goody two shoes schpiel is thrown out the window, replaced with sleeves that have been ripped off, muddy boots, spiked bracelets and his Metallica shirt in full view beneath his flared red coat. He calls this BIKER CLAUS!

Laddie is not a squasher of traditions! But there was the one time that David had to intervene when Paul and Dwayne thought it would be great to use Laddie as the star at the top of the tree. David practically had a heart attack. Well, that's impossible but it still felt like he was having one!

“Ho ho ho! Now, don’t be a bitch, little David or Santa will have to give you coal.” Paul stated mockingly to David, brows furrowed.

“Well, Santa,” David scolds, a wry smile developing on his face when setting down the eight year old now off to shake his presents beneath their behemoth of a tree. “You best be careful. You never know what's in those milk and cookies, hm?”

Each year Marko buys bird toys for the pigeons in the hotel. Well, buy is probably the wrong word. More like he liberates the stores of their stock. And then for the next six months, David has to hear the agonizing jingle of bells. David almost roasted one pigeon in particular that kept flying over him to drop the ball with a bell in it on his head. That was Paul's entertainment for the next five hours, hell, he'd try to find it if the bird lost it and give it back. Marko defends the pigeon. Between running through stores buying up surprises for his friends, he's helping Paul throw out decorations for the cave. The dollar store has some surprisingly unexpected treasures, allowing him to deck the fucking halls to the max. Tinsel here, ornaments there, tiny light up trees to hide around the caves, a butt ton of cinnamon pine cones which he ends up throwing back and forth with Paul.

And Paul often steals his gifts or goes dumpster diving for any hidden gems. He forgets to take the tags off of them the majority of the time, which is always an indicator whether or not its new. Any time Star asks where he got them from he refuses to answer. Just gets up and walks away. But for David's gift? Well this lucky bastard has found coal in the dumpster and chucks it to David when he's not looking and he sighs deeply in disappointment because this is the third year Paul has done this.

"Huh? What? Who did that? Wasn't me. Somebody's throwing stuff."

Other than that he'll find a fat bag of charcoal and just tape the name David on it. David is certainly not amused. Dwayne will actually try to figure out what the others want, and has the sense to save the money taken from their previous meals. After all, they're dead, they wouldn't have much use for it anyway. He's not about to waste his hypnosis on some poor cashier. That would be a waste of time in his eyes.

When Christmas did arrive the tree was piled with mysterious boxes crudely mashed and taped together with bows and ribbons underneath it. It's obvious which ones are from Star since those gifts are wrapped in neatly pressed paper, wound tight beneath curled ribbons that remind the boys of her hair. Marko often goes on a food run rather than allow them all to be subjected to a potentially charred turkey, no offense to Dwayne of course. So, with a table covered from end to end with copious bowls of gravy, potatoes, candied sweet potatoes, a beast of a turkey in the center packed to the brim with cornbread stuffing, the boys cram into their chairs knocking back beers and spiked cider. Keeping to their own traditions, after fattening up, they gather around the tree and play card games, just as they had over eighty years ago on that frigid night. David still slays them in poker, and Marko is an utter dark horse when it comes to blackjack. Paul insists they try Go Fish. No one ever wants to play Go Fish. Closer towards the end of the night Dwayne will slip away to Jasper's shrine and bring him a fresh glass of rum as well as unwrapping what he got him that year. While Dwayne is there, the other boys will join him - omitting Star and Laddie left unaware of the Lost Boy they'd never met - in celebrating the last hour or so of the Holiday season with their fallen comrade.

Although Christmas time is often about uncomfortable mushy moments and emotions that create deep, unfamiliar times for David. The entire ordeal becomes that for everyone of the boys and Star. But God forbid anyone who even mentions it! I mean, it's kinda obvious though considering he's spending it with the people he always called family, knee deep in traditions that are sentimental to himself and the boys. There's a fluster of emotions running rampant during this particular Holiday Season, and although the blonde brooding vampire decides to squint at it with skepticism he savors these moments, knowing like Jasper, it could all be swept away with a single ray of light or the foolish hand of a hunter. So as they sit, drunk, full, and laughing beside Jasper's grave he can't help but smile at the sentimentality of it all. Christmas is a pain in the ass, but… it's a pain he'll gladly sit through for his brothers.

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calumsclifford · 4 years

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it’s bella’s birthday and she deserves the absolute world, so i wrote this little fangirl au drabble! bella is the absolute champion of this au, she loves it more than anyone else, and just supports me relentless and i don’t know what i’ve done to deserve her in my life, but i’m so happy i know her! she is genuinely one of the most talented writers ever, is so kind and sweet and smart and creative and is just a beacon of light in this community. if you haven’t already, go wish her a happy birthday @clumsyclifford and check out her newest fic here, or this fic which is my favourite lashton fic ever, or her brazil fic which is a masterpiece and criminally underrated! happy birthday bella, i hope you have a wonderful day! ❤️

Luke only finds out that it’s Michael’s birthday when he comes back after class to about three feet of “Happy Birthday” balloons.

“Um,” Luke says, as if the balloons will somehow explain.

“Luke!”

Luke freezes, and then Ashton’s head is appearing from the approximate location of the floor in front of Michael’s bed.

“Um,” Luke says again.

“Perfect timing! Michael’s shift is done in an hour, and I still have two whole bags to go.”

Luke knocks his way to his bed, careful not to pop any of the balloons. Once he gets there, Ashton is tossing him a bag of uninflated balloons. Apparently, by living here, Luke has volunteered himself to help.

“So,” Luke says, tearing the bag open. “It’s Michael’s birthday?”

“He didn’t tell you?”

Luke shakes his head, stretches out a balloon then starts to inflate it.

“Has he even asked about your birthday? When’s your birthday?”

Luke ties off his inflated balloon and releases it into the room. “July 16th.”

“Mine is July 7th! Summer birthdays are the worst, right?”

“Yeah,” Luke says. He starts to inflate another balloon because he expects this to be a topic to which he cannot contribute a whole lot.

“As a kid especially! Everyone is on vacation or at the cabin or whatever, so no one really comes to summer birthday parties.”

Luke does not say anything, because he doesn’t want to tell Ashton that he doubts anyone would have come to his birthday parties, anyways.

“It’s not so bad now, though, because I get to see my family. Michael is stuck with just me,” Ashton says.

Luke releases another balloon to the room. “Seems like that’s a pretty good deal, for him.”

Ashton laughs. “I don’t think he’d agree with you.”

“Oh,” Luke says. He wonders how Michael could possibly disagree. No one has ever blown up balloons for Luke.

“If Michael had it his way, he’d probably spend his birthday at home, in his basement, playing video games alone for 24 hours straight.”

“Sounds tiring,” Luke says. He can only stare at a screen for 12 hours straight before his eyes start to burn, usually.

“To you and me, both,” Ashton laughs, open and exposed, a laugh to share. “If I could do anything for my birthday, I’d want to be at a concert with all of my friends, I think. There’s nothing like live music, you know?”

Luke nods, even though he’s been to two concerts in his life, and he had to leave one early because it was too crowded and he got jittery.

“What would you do? What would be your ideal birthday?”

The realistic answer would probably be writing, posting a celebratory one-shot, and then going out to a mid-range Italian restaurant with his family, maybe. Luke inexplicably wants Ashton to think that he’s interesting, though, so he makes something up on the spot.

“I’d want to go to New York or Chicago or something so that I could meet up with all of my friends from out of state,” Luke says, and he finds that it’s not actually untrue.

“That sounds like a great birthday,” Ashton grins. “It’s cool that you have friends from out of state! How did you meet them?”

“Different ways,” Luke says. “We’re not going to blow these balloons up in time,” he adds quickly, to change the subject.

“You’re right,” Ashton says. He fumbles around on Michael’s desk and gets music playing out of his portable speaker that Luke has never seen him use. It’s folky and calming, and Luke doesn’t mind it. “Let’s power through!”

Ashton convinces Luke to hide himself under the balloons before Michael gets back, and when they hear the door open, they jump up and yell “Happy birthday!”

Or rather, Ashton yells it, Luke says it. Michael is entirely unsurprised and unimpressed.

“You were in on this?” Michael says to Luke. Luke opens his mouth to explain, but Michael stops him. “You two are cleaning this up.”

“We can handle that,” Ashton says, brightly. He produces a cake from somewhere on the floor by Michael’s desk, and when he stands, the balloons are up to his stomach.

“You didn’t make that yourself, did you?” Michael asks, distrustful.

“Alex helped,” Ashton says, willfully oblivious to Michael’s even less enthused expression. “I didn’t get candles because they’re not allowed in the dorms, but I’m still going to sing.”

“Please don’t,” Michael says, but Ashton is already starting. It’s purposefully shrill and off key, and Luke has to hide his laugh in his hand because Michael keeps shooting him glares.

“Did you even bring plates?” Michael asks when Ashton is finally done.

“Even better,” Ashton says, and pulls three forks out of nowhere. “Who needs plates?”

“Luke thinks you’re barbaric,” Michael says. Luke pretends to get a text so that he can look away.

“If Luke wants a plate, I can find Luke a plate.”

“I don’t want a plate,” Luke says. He doesn’t even really want cake. He doesn’t want Michael’s cake, he doesn’t want to impose himself any further upon Michael’s life.

“See?” Ashton says to Michael, too enthusiastic to come off smug. “I told you. He’s cool.”

Michael snorts, but at least he tries to cover it up with a cough. Luke doesn’t take it badly, though. Michael is right. The idea that Luke is cool is, frankly, laughable.

Ashton hands out the forks and they eat, and the cake is actually pretty good. Luke doesn’t say anything though, because he can’t tell if Michael likes it.

Luke stops after eating the rough equivalent of half of a slice, and Michael and Ashton stop shortly after. They start to kick through the balloons, getting ready to go out.

“It’s just dinner,” Ashton says. “You should come. We promise there will be no crazy drunks.”

“He’s right,” Michael says. “You’ve got to be getting sick of the dining hall food by now.”

“I like some of it,” Luke says, defensively.

“It’s not as good as Pear’s, though,” Ashton says.

“I have a lot to do,” Luke says, which is true. He’s going home for Thanksgiving over the weekend and needs to get ahead in some schoolwork.

“If you’re sure,” Michael says. Ashton starts to say something, but Michael shoots him a look. Luke can’t see it from where he is, but Ashton drops it, thankfully.

After they’re gone, Luke deliberates for half an hour before finally giving up and going to see his RA.

He knocks on Rian’s door tentatively – he’s never sought him out, has only ever spoken to him when directly spoken to, and only ever very few words at that.

Rian opens the door, smiles wide. “Luke! What can I do for you?”

“Uh – my roommate’s – his uh, his boyfriend filled our room with balloons? I don’t know what to do with them.”

“Right, it’s Michael’s birthday! I’ll have to remember to say something later,” Rian says. He steps out of his room and closes the door but doesn’t lock it. He leads Luke back to his room but waits for Luke to open the door for him. “Wow, Michael’s boyfriend went a little crazy, huh?”

Luke shrugs, overwhelmed.

“We can get this sorted out, no problem. Do you have any pens? Mechanical pencils will also work.”

Luke produces a handful from his desk and Rian picks two, so Luke does so as well. “I’m happy you came to get me, this will be fun,” Rian says, and then he’s stabbing blindly at the balloons, popping 4 in quick succession. Luke figures that this idea is as good as any, so he starts stabbing as well.

The balloons are too loud to really enable any conversation, which is a blessing. Luke finds that he’s not uncomfortable, though. Rian is a calming presence, practiced in his confidence.

They’ve gone through all of the balloons within twenty minutes, and then Rian stays to help collect all of the balloon carcases. They don’t talk, they keep up a comfortable silence as they work. Maybe Luke isn’t so socially incompetent, after all.

Luke does not expect Michael to come back to their room that night, but he does. Luke is still up, working on a sociology assignment when Michael slams the door open, clearly expecting the room to still be a mess.

“This is the best birthday present I’ve ever fucking gotten,” Michael says, relieved.

“Rian helped,” Luke says.

“How did he know to help?”

“I asked him.”

“You? Approached Rian? On your own?” Michael asks. The worst part is that it’s not even mocking, Michael is genuinely surprised.

“I’m not completely useless,” Luke says.

“This is the first proof I’ve seen of that,” Michael says, which is mocking, thankfully. Luke is much more comfortable with Michael when he’s not being sincere.

“Well, don’t expect any more,” Luke says.

“Wasn’t planning on it.”

Luke focuses his attention back to his computer as Michael bangs around the room, getting ready for bed. He’s managed to write a few more sentences when he notices that Michael’s looking at him.

“You should have come,” Michael says.

“I got a lot done.”

“Did you go to the dining hall?”

“No,” Luke says, guiltily.

“Want to go now?”

“The cake was filling,” Luke says. Michael rolls his eyes, but doesn’t push.

“Good, because we’re eating cake for breakfast, tomorrow.”

Luke looks back down at his computer and supresses a smile.

#bella i know you're asleep rn but i wanted this posted early #you're just one of the best people i know and i am so happy to know you #i love you and i hope you have a good birthday #my fic #fangirl au #also disclaimer: i dont know anything about atl #dont come for me

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cupcakecoterie · 4 years

Video

youtube

@true0neutral - Hazel, half-elf cleric

@fauxfire76 - Darvin, human bard/sorcerer

@miaaoi - Froseth, dragonborn monk

@hyperewok1 - Remi, human paladin/warlock

@lindira - Clarity, tiefling rogue/wizard

Marion - Ava, human ranger

We were absent a Barnabus this session because of scheduling conflicts, but we absented him for some of it and had him stay largely quiet for others and it worked out more or less okay.

After the Horrible Sweater Incident, Flitty perked up and dragged Barnabus, with Hazel as translator, out into the hallway. After that, Barnabus stuck his head back in, went, “I’m really sorry about the sweater, I’mma go make it right” and then left with Flitty as a guide. He came back rather a lot later with a rather fantastic dress for Alisaie.

From Ava: Froseth got a sketch of him and Farideh in a folder, the inside cover of which read: “To second chances”. Darvin got a viol maintenance kit. Hazel got a bright green ribbon with “Hearthheart” embroidered on it in gold thread and the names of Twilly, Miranda, and all the Hearthheart kids done in very tiny halfling runes along the outer edge. Barnabus got a new notebook for all the new things he’s going to be taking notes about. Clarity got a new quill - fancy blue elegant quill that never runs out of regular ink (which she will still need to use magical ink for in order to copy new spells). Remi got a belt picked to match a dress Alisaie got Remi during their date-day-out thing. Alisaie got an anklet of angel wings. Alisaie is made of bling now.

From Hazel: Darvin got vignettes about the Hearthheart kids so he could write songs about them. Froseth got an extendable quarterstaff. Clarity got a book of pranks, jokes and riddles, and a reminder to reclaim the Deck of Illusions from Froseth’s Bag of Holding (also a kiss). Barnabus got a new pencil case with a pencil sharpener of the sort that we in our world have, and a coupon booklet of “One meal of ‘you tell me how to cook and I will cook it for you’ so you can have food from your home”. Ava got boots in the style of the People of the northern wastes (with help from Alisaie - they decided they wanted Ava to have a token of Alisaie claiming Ava as her ‘Rikka’, or clan-sister). Alisaie got this weird hair-goo elixir thing to get her hair back to its original length. Remi got an in-depth book about Pelor which also contained some information about his right-hand Solar, Ziriel - thus, Remi’s patron ... and the source of Alisaie’s being-aasimar.

After that, and Froseth happening to notice Alisaie glancing at the clock, the doorbell rang. Alisaie suggested that Hazel get it. Hazel did so, hearing a group of kids start singing Aurilmas hymns when she switched the hall light on. Those kids were seven of the Hearthheart kids, along with Twilly and Miranda. See, Hazel had asked Alisaie to let Twilly know what was going on, since Alisaie had Sending, and Alisaie kind of kept in touch enough to let them know that she was suggesting they celebrate Aurilmas a little early. So Twilly grabbed Miranda and seven of the kids (since eight plus her is all she can manage in a teleport) and thus brought Skylar, Farideh, Candor, Lissi, Oskar, Zanna, and Dawn - and the traditional Hearthhome Aurilmas cake, and presents - to join their celebrations so that Hazel didn’t have to spend an Aurilmas without her family. There was much squee.

Skylar underlined that if Froseth gets hurt or killed fighting the Big Bads, she’s taking the Oath of Vengeance and hunting down everything connected to that which took him away from her. Farideh added that she hadn’t been planning on focusing on attack magics but if bad happens to her big little brother, she’s learning attack magics to back Skylar up. No one told them that Froseth volunteered to be taken to be tainted with black shit or tortured by Tiamat rather than letting that happen to Alisaie. No one wanted to deal with that.

Present exchanges, and some news - apparently the Hearthhearts are coming back to Hearthhome soon and they may take the Cathays with them because scout-readable signs indicate that the wood elves and half-elves are evacuating the Elvenwild and given what they saw at the palace before they left (the corpses and everything), they have concerns. But they’ve decided to deal with the blue denying the deployed mercenaries reinforcements, then deal with Blackcrown, and then sort out the Elvenwild.

Alisaie fixed her hair and tried on the dress. With the wings and halo. She got stares.

After that, and saying good-byes to the family (who were going to be staying at a Honeycomb and taking a day to meet Quickflight cousins and shop), Hazel pulled Alisaie aside and apologised for yanking that much of her saved-up “rebuild my life” money on that resurrection diamond without even thinking that was a party fund item. They reached an understanding. It was sweet.

The next morning, they got ready for a big day heading underground. First, though, they had to go up - back to where they first went for the bottled lightning. Alisaie offered Ava a ten-minute flight around the city, saying that she’d wanted to offer before but knew Ava was afraid of heights, and then thought that maybe she was underestimating Ava so she’d at least make the offer. Ava, currently determined to face her fears, accepted the offer and got the Deluxe Air Tour in the just-coming-sunrise light from the city ... and also the sight of a gigantic copper dragon waking up, realising that people were awake and needed to get back into their humanoid shape again, but stretching his wings in a greeting display for the two flying women first.

After landing, they had to go down - as in, below ground level down. They had a corridor to navigate when they finally got to the level they needed and Hazel decided to knock on a door behind which she’d heard explosives. The door got answered by a little gnome woman who got them to agree to test some explosives (which seemed relatively safe, surprisingly enough; just she wanted to prove that they had the explosive yield she claimed they did).

Which was about where we stopped so we can have Barnabus involved in meeting people who actually will help progress the main quest.

#cupcake coterie #Youtube Vid #full session

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hms-chill · 4 years

Text

RWRB Chapter 15

Hi y’all! I’m going through Casey McQuiston’s Red, White & Royal Blue and defining/explaining references! Feel free to follow along, or block the tag #rwrbStudyGuide if you’re not interested!

Kensington gardens* (386): The park behind Kensington palace.

Hampton Court Palace (386): A London palace that is made up of both domestic Tutor and foreign Baroque styles.

Hyde Park (386): A large park in London.

Harrods (387): A fancy department store in London.

Long Water (388): A recreational lake in Kensington gardens.

Cullen skink (388): A thick Scottish soup made of smoked haddock, potatoes, and onions.

Maiden voyage (389): A ship’s maiden voyage is its first time out of port; as a term a maiden voyage is the start of something big.

Wellington boots (391): Any type of rubber boots.

Poison oak (392): A weed that grows in the woods and can cause a rash.

Swan song (393): A last effort or performance given before retirement

Punt so hard (393): Punt is a football term, but in this case, it means to play it safe rather than taking a risk for a potentially much larger payoff.

Rebecca Traister (396): An American writer known for her feminist, political work.

Roxane Gay (396): An American writer and professor whose work deals with race, feminism, and sexuality.

Captain America-esque (396): A superhero who, even before becoming a superhero, picked street fights with “bullies” and pretty much anyone he sees taking advantage of someone else.

Hello! US (398): A celebrity/royal news magazine.

Linoleum floor (399): Linoleum is an inexpensive, hardy flooring option common in community centers, schools, and other high-traffic areas that are generally unconcerned with looking nice.

Blue (400): the color associated with the Democratic (liberal) party.

Zilker Park (400): The most popular park in Austin, the hub for many recreational activities and the start of popular hiking and biking trails.

VRA in ‘65 (401): The Voting Rights Act of 1965, which prohibits racial discrimination in voting.

Palmer Event Center (401): A large event center in central Austin.

Girl-next-door (401): A term for a girl who is idolized as sweet; one you grew up near and maybe had a crush on.

Dallas to Austin (402): While it takes ~30 minutes to fly from Dallas to Austin, it takes ~2 hours and 30 minutes to drive.

Protestant God (403): The Republican party is often associated with steadfast Christianity, despite actively doing things that the Bible condemns.

Super Bowl (404): The biggest football game of the year.

Obama v. McCain (404): The 2008 presidential race between Barack Obama and John McCain, when Democrat Barack Obama became the first African American president of the US.

Letterman jacket (405): A letterman jacket is awarded to a high school athlete who has made varsity or been on a team for a certain amount of time.

APUSH (405): Advanced placement US history, a US history course taken for college credit while in high school.

Anderson Cooper (406): Openly gay journalist and TV anchor for CNN.

CNN (406): The Cable News Network, a liberal leaning news station.

1976 Jimmy Carter (406): Jimmy Carter was the American president from 1977-1981. He pardoned Vietnam War draft dodgers on his second day in office, and he is the only US president to have lived in subsidized housing before taking office. His lower class farming background meant that many saw him as a man of the people.

Gerald Ford (406): Following Nixon’s Watergate scandal and resignation (to prevent impeachment), Gerald Ford was sworn in as president. He was president from 1974-1977 and is the only person to serve as both president and vice president without being voted in.

Yellow rose of Texas (407): “The Yellow Rose of Texas” is a song from 1850 singing the praises of a beautiful biracial woman. (listen here)

Wolf Biltzer (408): An American journalist who has been an anchor for CNN since 1990 and is their lead political reporter.

West Side Bastardos (408): Los Angeles Westside is (generally speaking) a younger, well-educated neighborhood (more stats here). “Bastardos” is Spanish for “bastards”.

Gloria Estefan (408): A Cuban-American singer/songwriter who has work in both Spanish and English. (listen here and here)

Whiskey-warm drawl (409): When you drink whiskey, it’s a warm sensation that starts in the back of your throat, then goes down to warm you up from the inside. Whiskey is also commonly associated with Texas/the Wild West.

Canvassed (410): Canvassing is when you go door-to-door encouraging people to vote for a certain candidate.

Hunger Games cannon (410): In The Hunger Games, a canon goes off and an announcement appears in the sky when an contestant has been killed.

Backyard shooting range (411): American gun law is... deeply broken, and Florida in particular is known for being a bit wild.

Mijo (411): A Spanish term of endearment that literally translates to “My son”.

Mafioso (413): A member of the mafia.

Brownstone (414): A type of townhouse common in New York City that can cost up to four million dollars.

Concession call (414): A call from a political candidate admitting that they’ve lost a race.

Oil paintings (415): Every American president has an official portrait of them, traditionally an oil painting.

Library of Congress (415): The research library that officially serves congress and is the de facto national library of the US.

Dried flowers from a homecoming corsage (416): When a girl is asked to her high school homecoming, the asker will typically buy her a corsage, a small bouquet worn around the wrist.

Cordless phone (416): Probably a home phone (did other people grow up with those? Pre-cell phones), which would be used by everyone in the house.

Rec center tutoring (416): Tutoring younger kids is a common volunteer project for high schoolers, and the fact that it’s at a community recreation center means that it is probably offered for free.

Barton Creek Greenbelt (416): A long, thin park that runs through southwest Austin.

Cold-brews (416): A type of iced coffee that has become especially popular in the past few years.

Lavaca (417): A street in central Austin that runs past the Texas State Capital Building.

“Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now” (417): A song about how a couple is going to make it through anything together and nothing is going to stop them from achieving their goals. (listen here)

Everything’s bigger, after all (417): A reference to the saying that everything’s bigger in texas.

Old West Austin (417): A very well-off, historic district in Austin, TX.

Westover (417): A road in Old West Austin, presumably the one Alex’s family used to live on.

------

*Fun fact, J.M. Barrie wrote Peter Pan here! Another fun fact, Barrie was asexual!

------

And that’s a wrap! We did it! If there’s anything I missed or that you’d like more on, please let me know! And if you’d like to/are able, please consider buying me a ko-fi? I know not everyone can, and that’s fine, but these things take a lot of time/work and I’d really appreciate it!

—–-

Chapter 1 // Chapter 14

#rwrb study guide #rwrb analysis #rwrb #red white and royal blue #red white and royal blue analysis #henry fox mountchristen windsor x alex claremont diaz #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #bea fox mountchristen windsor #nora holleran #june claremont diaz #pez okonjo #firstprince #super six #the white house trio

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viviennes-tears · 4 years

Text

Are you following me Mr Hiddleston? Chapter 11

18+ blog: It is YOUR responsibility, as a reader, to think about the content that you consume at your own discretion.

------------------------------

Margot pulled out her phone and pressing the power button, to reveal the notification on the screen. It was Charlie. Charlie had been trying to contact Margot all weekend, but never received an answer from her. Margot took a deep breath and huddled herself into a classroom door, further down the corridor. She unlocked her phone bringing up Charlie's message properly.

"Margot, Please text me back. I'm worried about you."

Margot glanced around her watching students pass her, before returning her attention back to her phone screen. "Hi Charlie, sorry for making you worry about me. I'm fine. I've just been busy with uni and Peyton visited over the weekend. To also answer your previous messages, yes I have seen the photos and yes I am fine with it. I mean I have to get used to that kind of attention if I ever became a good enough actor. Anyway its sweet of you to ask about me :)" Margot tried to make herself sound confident and more upbeat than she was actually feeling. Well she was doing better than she was all weekend mind.

It didn't take long for Charlie to reply "Thank god, you're alive! Haha. I hope Peyton is well and uni has been great so far. Sorry for worrying so much about you. I-I just needed to be sure you were doing ok. No doubt you'll be the next Meryl Streep!"

"I am yes, haha. He is well thanks and it has been. No its fine honestly! I'm fine I promise. Meryl Streep? You sure I won't be the next Anna Kendrick? Or perhaps Amanda Seyfried? Keala Settle? "Margot tried to list well known younger actors who are also known for their singing talents. Well she liked Meryl Streep but she hoped to be compared to someone younger.

"You'll be amazing!" admittedly Charlie has never seen her acting but he believed in her nonetheless.

"Thanks, Charlie! I have to go now, speak to you soon :)"

"Bye Margot enjoy your day :)"

Margot put her phone away and hurried off to her next class, with Mrs Shaw. The improvisation class.

Time skip. Friday.

Friday was here. Tom dropped Bobby off at his sister Emma's the night before, as she volunteered to dog sit for a while. Tom was going to take Bobby with him, but Emma thought he needed to focus on his work, and not having a dog to take care of at the same time. At first Tom wasn't too happy about leaving Bobby behind, although he'd done it before, its just at first he thought he needed a companion with him on the trip. In the end though Emma convinced him it would be for the best, and if Tom were to feel lonely he could Face-Time at any point and she'd put Bobby on screen. It at least made Tom feel a little better about leaving Bobby.

It was now 6:50am. Tom was doing his last checks to make sure he had everything he needed for his trip when suddenly, his phone pinged pulling his attention away from his suitcase.

"Hey Tommy, just wanted to text before you fly off and say don't work too hard. And try not to let anything or anyone keep you down, we all love you bro. Bobby says he loves you too. Stay safe x" Tom smiled a little at his sister's text.

"Hi, thanks Em. Ehehe, you know me when it comes to work but I'll try not to because you asked so nicely. Love you all too, very dearly. Give everyone including Bobby a kiss from me and don't let him pester you too much x"

Once Tom finished up and was just about to head downstairs the doorbell rang. He quickly grabbed his rucksack placing it over his right shoulder, and wheeled his suitcase to the top of the stairs, then he hurriedly carried everything down to the front door. He opened the door and was greeted by his driver Conrad Reed. Conrad took Tom's suitcase off him and put it into the boot of his car, as Tom locked up. Conrad opened the door for Tom and gave him a bright smile. Tom returned a smile although his wasn't as bright. He took off his rucksack before sliding into the car, and placing it down on the seat next to him. Conrad closed the door once Tom was seated and got into the drivers seat, as Tom put his seat belt on.

"Ready Mr Hiddleston?" Conrad asked cheerfully looking back at Tom.

"Yes, thank you. And how many times do I have to tell you to call me Tom?" Tom replied as he settled himself further back in his seat.

"Every time sir...I mean Tom. Right then to the airport." Conrad turned back facing forward and started up the engine.

After twenty minutes of driving they hit traffic. Which was rather unusual at this time in the morning. Suddenly, Tom's phone rang with Luke's number on the screen.

"Hi Luke, no need to worry about me. I am awake and all packed now I'm on my way to the airport as we speak. Although, we've seem to have hit traffic." Tom tried to sound like he was in a much better mood than he was.

"God you're joking, right?" Luke heavily sighed, and not in the mood for pleasantries after he heard the word traffic.

"Well hello to you too, but I'm afraid not." Tom bit his lip wondering what Luke was going to say next.

"Christ, why today? Ok just keep me updated will you?" Luke sounded really impatient now.

"Sure" they soon ended the conversation and hung up.

Tom looked out the window after putting his phone back into his pocket. He sat there in complete silence, with his mind wondering over the events of the past year. He was thinking about Zawe most of all and a little about Margot too. On occasion Conrad would look back at Tom, via his mirror to check on him, without having to disturb his thoughts. He was worried about Tom and he hoped he could find a few words to say once at the airport.

8:55am was the time on Tom's phone when the car finally pulled over. He quickly texted Luke to say he'd just arrived, and hastily got out of the car, not waiting for Conrad to open his door. He simply didn't have the time to wait. Conrad was a bit out of sorts as Tom was doing his job for him. Tom slammed the boot closed once he took out his suitcase. As he was wheeling his suitcase to the curb Conrad stopped him in his tracks.

"Sorry sir, I know you're in a rush and all but...I just wanted to say that I know you're missing Miss Ashton. She was a wonderful woman and I certainly know she was good to you. I'm sure the two of you will keep in touch no matter what happened between you two. Also, I'm sure you'll enjoy your time away for a while and I know you'll meet someone else. Safe travels Mr Hiddleston." Conrad straightened out Tom's jacket and gave him a smile.

"Thank you, Conrad. Seriously thank you. You're a good man. I'll see you when I get back." Tom patted Conrad on the upper arm, and swiftly moved on heading straight inside meeting up with Luke.

Tom was whisked through baggage, and customs as the workers asked if anyone was due for the 9:30 flight. Although, Tom felt guilty for having skip passed others, he still had to make his flight on time. But once on the plane he put his Airpods in to listen to some jazz.

------------------------------

Margot jolted herself awake, with the sudden realisation that she was late. She had no time to shower, although she did have one the night before, and she didn't smell bad or anything. So she figured she would be fine if she skipped it. Margot grabbed hold of whatever was the closest thing to wear, which turned out to be a simple white v neck t shirt, and blue jeans. She threw on her black denim jacket over the top and slipped on her black, and white vans before throwing her work into her bag. Just as she headed for the door handle Margot realised that she hadn't picked up her phone. She sighed loudly to herself and picked it up. Margot rushed out the door of the student accommodation, then ran as fast as she could to the tube station.

Margot had previously stayed in a small flat, that she rented off a couple who had gone away for a few days. It was kind of like a mini house sitting job, without being paid as she paid them. She just needed a place until her student accommodation was sorted, as some idiot hadn't filled their end of the paper work, or hadn't filed it properly before she got to London. She spent her first night in a cheap hotel, while she managed to find the advertised small flat online, which was more than ample for a short stay. Of course Margot didn't really unpack as there was no point, not until she had gotten to her real accommodation, which is for the next two years. Margot could have easily found somewhere to rent what with her inheritance, and for selling her family home, but she deiced to experience the full university life. Besides living with others would make a nice change, at least that was her thought. However, she had yet to make friends, with those she was living with.

It was 10:15am by the time Margot had gotten to the theater at uni. Everybody's eyes were on her as soon as she stepped in breathless. Her tutor Mr Bentley was unimpressed. He stood there tapping his foot waiting for Margot to take a seat. Once seated at the back Margot quickly took out her script, but she hadn't packed it. She had a load of paper work but not what she needed right now. Mr Bentley started to carry on with what he was talking about the current scene, but the rustling and the whisper cursing coming from the back of the room, made it off putting and difficult to keep track of his words. Margot kept thinking the script had to be in there, as she continued to search for it in her bag. After a couple more minutes Mr Bentley paused his lesson once more. Margot never noticed.

"Miss Foster!" Mr Bentley raised his voice enough for her to snap her to attention, but it wasn't quite shouting.

"Yes, Mr Bentley?" Margot answered nervously looking through the fallen strand of hair that was in front of her eyes. She could feel everyone staring once again but only those in front of her were visible.

"Miss Foster, you turn up late to my class disrupting your fellow students, and myself. Then you continue to do so from your seat. Prey tell, what are you fussing over back there?" Mr Bentley stepped forward, placing his foot up onto the bottom step of the seating, staring up at Margot.

"I am truly sorry sir, everyone...I-I was just looking for my script, but I think I forgot to pack it this morning." These words made Mr Bentley sigh heavily, and pinch the bridge of his nose to help him string, his next words together.

"For now you may share with Miss Carlyle. Next time and for all future days, whilst here you better make sure you are prepared, like I told you all on your first day in my class." Mr Bentley cleared his throat, before getting back to his place which he almost forgot exactly where. Internally Margot was kicking herself for causing so much mayhem before 12 o'clock.

Margot turned to Mary (Miss Carlyle) the red head who was sat to her right. Mary was quite pretty with her red hair falling, just to the tops of her shoulders, with a few layers in it to give it some style. And her skin was rather pale like a porcelain doll, she only wore light pink lip gloss, and mascara to make her lashes appear longer, and green eyes stood out without the need for much.

Mary seemed like quite a shy person, as she awkwardly shuffled over slightly, allowing Margot to see her script as instructed. Although, Mary seemed this way Margot would soon see her come out of her shell. Once Mr Bentley was finished talking he grouped his students into groups of fours, and giving them their next task. He asked them to all find two monologues to audition with. One classical and one contemporary.

Margot of course was in a group with Mary, the other two were Bradly Morris and Jeff Wilcox. Bradly has short dark brown (close to black) hair perfectly quaffed at the top, with shaved sides, slightly muscular and small close together facial features. Even his eyes were small round brown ones. Jeff has a generic sandy hair style, twig like frame and rounded brown framed glasses, making his hazel eyes magnified. Margot's first impressions of Bradly, well he seemed to be one of those actors, who already thought he was hot shit. Even from their improvisation sessions with Mrs Shaw, Margot could tell working with him was going to be a challenge. For now though it shouldn't be as bad right? As it's only searching for the right monologues. As for Jeff, Margot's first impressions of him were kind of similar to Mary's. He had more confidence than she had but only just. Once the four of them got together, and all groups were dismissed to the library for the reminder of the lesson, Mary hung back as the group made their way up the stairs. As they walked down the corridor after coming up the stairs, Margot noticed Mary plodding along behind. So Margot waited for her to catch up and giving her a smile once she had. The boys haven't noticed, of course.

Just as Margot thought, Bradly was a pain in the ass. He kept dismissing every monologue she would find, and tried to push the ones he thought would be more ideal for her. Margot ended up just sitting there, with her arms folded with a stern look on her face, while the others carried on searching for their monologues.

Three weeks later. Saturday 3rd October.

Tom was done with his business in New York and heading back to London. It had been a bit of an exhausting time, with all the meetings and re-recordings, although he did quite enjoy himself, at times once he got into working. He spent his days busy hard at work, but most nights he was kept awake by his thoughts. When he did manage to sleep, he'd almost sleep through his alarm clock. He also tried to keep up his running to help clear his head. Tom did Face-Time Emma a few times to see how she was, and to of course see Bobby. He even called his Mum, and his other sister Sarah a couple of times too, even dropping Benedict a text here and there. However when doing voice recording sessions its a rarity if you actually record, with anyone at the same time. He did however bump into Hayley Atwell on his way to the studio, one of the days. They arranged to meet up later that day to have a coffee.

Flash back

Tom took a deep breath and rolled up his white button down shirt sleeves, before heading into the cafe, where he and Hayley had arranged to meet. As he pushed the door open, a little bell above the door rang. Tom glanced around the little cafe, from where he stood by the door. Suddenly, a waving hand caught his eye. It was Hayley. Tom walked over to where she was sat, which was near the kitchen door at a table for two. Hayley stood up and hugged him, as she greeted him with a smile. They both sat down and began to look through the menu. Within five minutes a young girl came over to their table, with her notepad and pencil. She was clearly star struck, when she realised who she was severing. She tried her best to keep it together.

"Hi I'm Catherine, I'll be your sever today. What can I get you?" she asked, with a slight shakiness in her voice.

"I would love a latte and a Danish please" Hayley asked as she closed and popped her menu back.

"And I will just have an espresso please." It was odd for Tom not to order a pudding, but today he thought he would pass on life's little pleasures, like eating something so delicious as pudding. Catherine quickly wrote their order down and hurried off.

"So Thomas...what do I owe for this unexpected pleasantry?" Hayley began speaking as soon as they were alone again.

"Well I saw you at the studio, and thought what the hell. We don't spend much time together and..." Tom paused looking down at his hands which he held together out in front of him on the table.

"And what?" Hayley asked curiously.

"And...It’s nice to spend time with someone outside of work for a change." Tom replied, once he brought his gaze back up to Hayley. Although, Hayley could tell there was more to it than that but she didn't inquire any further. At least not right away.

Catherine soon returned with their order and placed it front of them. She then kindly asked if she could possibly get their autograph before they left. Both Hayley and Tom agreed to make sure they did, before they would leave. This made Catherine grin from ear to ear with delight, and left the two alone to enjoy their coffees. They were sat in silence as Hayley ate, and Tom was done with his espresso, before she could even finish her second mouthful. He ordered himself another, but asked for it to be brought once Hayley had finished eating.

"How did your recording session go?" Hayley asked, as she swallowed her last mouthful.

"Good. Although, I was worried we weren't going to be done by the time we said we'd meet. Luckily we did and it’s all done now. How did yours go?" Tom seemed in a better mood now, which Hayley was pleased about.

"Great, in fact I hope to do more again soon. I enjoy it immensely." Hayley said before taking a sip of her latte, by which time Tom's second espresso had arrived.

"I know exactly what you mean, but I haven't really done a hole lot of animation work." Tom thinks back to when he worked on Early Man, and Tinker Bell and the Pirate Fairy.

"Well maybe you should think about, getting involved with a couple more of those kinds of projects." Hayley suggests with a smile.

"Perhaps, I shall." They talked for a good further thirty minutes, before they realised they were the last two in the place. Catherine approached them to inform them they were closing. Hayley grabbed her bag as they stood from their chairs. And Tom like the gentlemen he is he paid ,despite Hayley's instance in paying it herself. After she gave in for Tom to pay she thanked him generously. And just like they promised they both signed their names, on a piece of paper from Catherine's notepad, as that's all she had for them to sign. Catherine was overly joyed. Especially, because originally she was meant to be on her day off, but she had to fill in for a colleague.

After heading out Tom asked if Hayley would join him on a walk, to which she agreed to and took Tom's arm when he offered it to her. For the first few minutes they simply walked without a word spoken, just taking in the New York air and walking the crowded streets, as Tom slipped on his shades, which a moment ago were hanging from his open shirt collar.

"Tom?" Hayley pipped up, after a while of walking.

"Yeah?" Tom kept his eyes fixed on the direction they were heading in.

"Back there you seemed a little...out of sorts when you first sat down. I didn't want to go into it too much at first but I am now, what's wrong?" Hayley felt Tom tense up a little, while her arm was still looped with his.

"I've not been doing great lately." Tom admitted. "I thought working would help...I mean to has to an extent, but it can never truly stop me from thinking about what's been going on. You know?" Tom felt his stomach churn a little. Maybe the lack of food and the mass of espressos had done it.

"I understand. It can all be too much sometimes." Hayley took a longer glance, at Tom as they continued walking. She could tell that his expression showed there was more to it, than he was letting on. "Tom..." Hayley pulled on his arm getting him to stop to one side, away from the passing people. "Tom I have a feeling there's a deeper reason for your behaviour. Tell me." Hayley pressed her lips into a thin line, as she waited for his reply.

Tom sighed heavily. "Not here." He said close to a whisper, then he took her by the hand leading her forward. Tom flagged down a cab just up the road a bit. He kindly opened the door for her and let her slide in, before he made his way around to the other side, on the busy road. Tom gave the driver the address for his hotel. As they sat there Tom tried to keep a positive conversation going, which had nothing to do with her question, but it saved the awkward silence.

After a twenty-five minute drive they arrived at the hotel. Tom was about to pay but Hayley beat him to it, saying it was only fair for her to pay for something. Tom didn't argue but smiled slightly, before he stepped out of the cab, then opened the door once again for her. They linked arms once more as they made their way to his room, which was on the sixth floor. They stopped at the door with the number saying 609, in black on a golden plate. Tom fiddled in his pockets for the card key then opened the door, holding it open for her and used his other hand, gesturing her to go ahead. Hayley made herself comfortable on the sofa placing her bag down by her feet. Tom offered her a drink, but she turned down the offer. He nervously settled himself down next to her on the sofa. He took a moment to compose himself before explaining everything.

"I'm sorry about your break up with Zawe, I mean I understand why though. Yes, I agree she should have told you, about the other guy she had feelings for sooner, but Tom how do you feel now about Margot?" Hayley sat herself sideways a little closer, as she patted his arm in comfort.

"She's...she's on my mind all the time just like Zawe is." Tom had already said that and he knew he had.

"Yes, but how do you really feel about her, Tom?"

"It doesn't matter how I feel."

"Tom of course it does!" Hayley knew she wasn't going to get a proper answer out of him, so she dropped it. "Have you spoken to Chris Hemsworth or Benedict lately?" Hayley changed the subject.

"I haven't spoken to Chris much. He's been filming and out of phone range for a while. Last we spoke he said he would call once he could. That was before Zawe and I broke up. Ben an I have been in constant contact."

"Does they know about Margot?" Tom knew she'd bring Margot back up.

"Chris kind of knows, we didn't get to speak much last time. However Ben knows everything."

Hayley left after an hour. On her way out she gave Tom all her best and hugging him tight. He quickly kissed her cheek then she was gone. He went to bed that night and fell into a dreamless sleep.

---------------

Once Tom was back on English soil he took a deep breath and was glad to be back. Conrad was right on time as always to pick him, and Luke was with Conrad. Luke never went to New York, he was just at the airport for those finally few things. The usual. Unless he was defiantly required to go. Luke went over Tom's up coming schedule on their way. The schedule was for after Tom's few days off. Tom wasn't exactly listening, but he tried his best. Luke was dropped off back home first. However, Tom didn't want to go home right away, as he wanted to go pick up Bobby as soon as he could. Plus he wanted to catch up with his sister.

"Hi Em, just got back from New York. I'll be over soon to see you. Can't wait to catch up! I hope Bobby hasn't been too much of a handful x"

After waiting for five minutes Emma replied. "Hi Tommy, I hope you had a good trip and that you didn't work too hard, like I told you not to. Can't wait to see you! No he's been an angel the entire time. Also hope you had a safe flight back x"

"Ehehe, well sort of. Oh good glad he's been behaving and yeah, it was alright. I got a bit of sleep on the plane, but not much. Anyway be there soon x"

"I'll make sure to put the kettle on ready for your arrival x"

Fifteen minutes later Conrad pulled the car over, to the curb outside of Emma's house. He then got out to open the door for Tom, and he smiled as he did so. Tom smiled back and instructed to have his luggage dropped off home for him. Conrad had a spare key to drop everything off inside. He closed the door behind Tom and wished him a good afternoon, before hoping back into the car. Tom also returned the well wishes and informed Conrad, that he'd find his own way back home later. Once Tom was at the door step Conrad drove off, heading for his next destination. Tom rang the bell and heard a few barks coming from within. Bobby didn't bark often, but just hearing it now made Tom happy. Then the door swiftly opened.

"Tommy!" Emma beamed, wrapping her arms around her brother tightly. Tom wrapped his arms around her, even tighter and smiling. Bobby was jumping around their feet.

"It's so good to see you!" Tom said, as the pulled away from their hug. Bobby jumped up at Tom. "Ehehe, it's good to see you too, buddy!" Tom ruffled Bobby's hair on top of his head, as Bobby's tail was wagging madly.

Tom followed Emma into the house, closely being followed by Bobby. They walked through to the kitchen, where Emma had prepared their cups for the tea. As Tom seated himself at the kitchen table, bending forward making a big fuss over Bobby, the kettle had just come to a boil. Soon after Emma joined him at the table bringing their teas over. By this point Bobby had started to settle down by Tom's feet. Tom took a sip of his tea. There was nothing better than tea. Earl Grey tea.

"I know we've texted a little but, how are you?" Emma asked, with a worrying look.

"In all honesty...better. I still miss Zawe from time to time, when I think about her, but it was for the best. I have called her to see how she is. She says she's doing good than she has in months. So I'm happy she's happy." Tom smiled slightly with a firm grip on his cup.

"I'm glad, we've all been worried about you Tom." Emma reached out for his free hand, and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"You can all stop now." Tom lightly squeezed her hand back.

Tom stayed a little over two hours, before he collected Bobby's things putting them into Emma's car. She offered to drive them home, as it saved a taxi ride and saved Tom struggling, to try and carry everything home if they walked. The ride to Tom's was silent, but not in a bad way. Accept the sound of Bobby panting a little from his walk, they went on before they left. Once Emma had gotten to Tom's he thanked her for the lift, and lightly pressed a kiss to her cheek, and hugged her. She had offered to take Bobby's things inside for him but Tom declined, telling her she'd done more than enough for him, while he was away. However, Emma waited outside until she was satisfied, that Tom and Bobby had everything. And left after Tom waved goodbye from his door.

Tom Hiddleston Masterlist

Source: @viviennes-tears

#are you following me mr hiddleston #fan fiction #tom hiddleston fanfiction #tom hiddleston #hiddles #HIDDLESTONERS #betrayal #Harold Pinter #charlie cox #zawe ashton #margot foster #chapter 11 #viviennes-tears

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terrorhqs · 4 years

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hello to each and every one of you absolute wonders !! first of all, we would like to apologize for the wait - when we saw 8 apps hitting the inbox in the last few hours, we knew we would have some Serious Work on our hands. it took us longer than we expected to go through all of them, mainly because every single one was absolutely incredible, and this entailed several very, very tough decisions. we also wanted to be as accommodating as possible for certain applicants who inspired us to make a few changes along the way - with their backstories, their line of thinking, their amazing character, which we will note below. this truly was a round of acceptances where we thought we might create a whole new batch of skeletons just to showcase each app. thank you to everyone who applied. and for everyone who got accepted, please make sure to send in your accounts in 24h !!

HENRY for THE COMMANDER (james norton)

henry, your writing was an absolute treat, but it was truly your future plot ideas we were feasting on! we absolutely loved how tightly tied to fitzwilliam’s psyche they were, how terribly heart wrenching they were - particularly the first one - we have to admit it made us weepy and excited in equal measure.

GEN for THE DEVOTED, captain’s steward (richard deiss)

gen, your writing flourishes and entrances and beguiles, just as rowan does, and the two of you do it so effortlessly. your in-character response was a brilliant show of creativity and development in showing how rowan reacts to the same question asked by different people, and we knew he would be a phenomenon onboard the promethean. your app was showstopping, and we couldn't wait to welcome you aboard.

CAIT for THE SOCIALITE (tuppence middleton)

the whole personality of stella was a whirlwind in motion !! we were so eager to read more about them from the very first seconds. and the prose ! how beautiful ! (Worship the altar of this consuming, rebellious heart and wear it in red, bathe in this baptismal font of sordid gossip, glory, erupting nights of heated duels between wit and ego) - this is the epitome of what we wanted for them, and even more than we could’ve hoped !

KAT for THE DOCTOR (dev patel)

kat, please let us dwell with jonathan in his sunshine and pure spirit forever?? we are all rosa diaz on this blessed day and he is a golden retriever puppy we would all kill for. we love his love for nature’s wonders and for people alike, but we also adore the depth and understanding you brought to his future plots. we welcome you and jonathan to the crew with such, such open arms !

ALICE for THE DOE-HEARTED (su yihan)

alice, your writing was a siren song that lulled us into the depth of sybil's story - in a heartbeat, we would drown in it all over again. you kept the essence of the doe-hearted but took it so much further in making her a girl haunted, the buildup of sybil and her story a grimm fairytale to be told again and again. "You were born by the water, sweet thing. Your story is the sea with but an island in the middle of it." you have truly woven a complexity to the doe-hearted that we never expected - we'll all be holding our breaths to see how our dear fairytale fares on open waters !!

BEAU for THE INTREPID (tobias menzies)

oh, beau. the entire process of your application was as beautiful and chaotic as a natural phenomenon - it felt like we need albert in this rp, and that weight had the certainty of force? we knew we have to give him the leeway for development he deserved. i cannot properly convey how much we loved the schematics of his past, and how it contrasted with his ideals for the future. he is a map of contrasts and we are so eager to see him on the dash !

NAYAB for THE ENIGMA (katrina kaif)

nayab, the way you illustrated jaya's rich history was absolutely delectable - we were positively screaming over the intricate detail you put into the creation of such a nuanced, interesting, and fiery character. the research and thought you put into jaya absolutely wowed us, and it was impossible not to love (and admittedly, cower a little before) her. "what if this expedition makes you encounter what even you - with your cautious gait, and sharp, dark-eyed gaze - never saw coming?" what a cannonball she is, and what an impact she had on us !

JINHEE for THE HARUSPEX (avan jogia)

jinhee, ashwin is an absolute delight and so was reading your application! as rhi screamed, ‘FUCK I BELIEVE IN HOPE AGAIN??’ we loved the icarus imagery and were not prepared to be completely undone by this line: (and weren’t you told never to touch your idols? warned that the gilding will stick to your fingers?). the way you took his father’s ancestry and tied into his present feelings for britain was absolutely chef’s kiss. we were enamored from start to finish - well done.

KYLIE for THE IDOL (garret hedlund)

oh, what a STUNNING app !! it is so difficult to balance guilt and righteousness, and we feel like you did that thoroughly for jack. your level of close-reading through our skeleton was genuinely flattering, but the way you took it to new depths (and heights) was humbling. we are so, so eager to see how the tide will turn for jack, and all the possible ways you can give him a redemption arc - or the lack of one.

N for THE LOVER (zoe kravitz)

N, let me prostrate myself at eleonore’s feet. your application was so rich and beautifully written, truly embodying the lover’s feline lethality that you want to pet anyway despite knowing she might very well be your downfall. “feed me was all she had ever asked in exchange for burning day and night for him.” hello yes, we volunteer.

TILDA for THE NOBLE (madeline madden)

it was very hard choice for the noble, but tilda, i adore helene’s family’s backstory, how it seemed to rot from the core until collapse. you truly grasped the character and her yearning for abandon, her desperation, and her voice/dialogue in your in-character response was utterly delightful! we can’t wait to see her voyage from sea-legged noble lady to tide commanding shanty.

ADRIAN for THE PURSER (matthew goode)

if only you could see how we reacted when we received this app ! and trust me, the hype only increased when we got to reading it. did we channel that excitement through God-honest tears? uh, yes. we did. ( dead can’t receive letters but Edward still writes them anyway. ) we clutched edward to our chest time and time again through that - and the SPLENDID letter added at the end, what a treat to us ! we are so thankful just at the privilege of reading this. we’re even more thankful that we’ll see him on the dash.

EMI for THE ROMANTIC, wardroom steward (yang yang)

emi, we've concluded with all of your beautiful plot points that you and june do indeed, have the range - you gave us such a variety of wonderful exploration of june's personality, psyche, hopes, and dreams all wrapped up in the beautiful poetry that fit june's character like a second skin. "the light upon the ice. a brilliant, sightless mirror. it comes not from the sun but from our prometheus, barrelling out from dark waters with an inexplicable gift: fire." you've captured him so beautifully and we cannot wait to see how he will be the promethean's sun to the open seas !

CLAUDIA for THE SCION (rome flynn)

you really manged to send a :59 app and still steal the show ! how very Scion-y of you. in all seriousness, i adored augustus background so MUCH - his maternal connection, the wishy-washy tides of his family’s structure, the conflict inherent in his very development !! so so good. you took a carefree skeleton and you gave it a million possible depths. we, as both admins and players, are so grateful for it.

AERIN for THE SHADOW (sebastian stan)

aerin, it is not an exaggeration that your app had us literally with our jaws open the entire time ? you truly took us turn after turn into elijah's story and hours later, we're still breathless and trying to recover from it. you captured the shadow's overcast history the way a shadow slowly looms over you - we were absolutely consumed by the end of it, and we're all here absolutely begging for more. we can't wait to have enoch onboard this expedition !

CASS for THE GODKILLER (kofi siriboe)

this is the sort of role dreams are made of. i think i speak for everyone when i say we never could have envisioned a skeleton as terrific, terrifying, tectonic as abel. stop me with the alliterations - lapsing into poetry is genuinely the only thing left to do when the support of prose fails you? you brought us to the end of prose. their role just jumped out for us and we knew it called for an entire skeleton. what an app !

ANNIE for THE STOWAWAY (riana hardesty)

i have to confess, we had such high expectations for the stowaway, because we knew their motivation would be one of the toughest to crack - and annie, you exceeded literally even the most optimistic of them ! (You’re no musician, but playing the melody of someone else, someone who can weasel their way in and out of a bad spot - that’s one song you know how to sing well enough.) that is such a fantastic rendition of their personality, and written so, so beautifully !

LEO for THE VETERAN (toby stephens)

i think this app was the one which sent me in a banshee-screech session that was genuinely disturbing to everyone on a 100 miles radius. the way you phrased the headcanons at the end had me in stitches - which was a welcome change for how DEEPLY i was feeling wells’ backstory. from sobbing to laughter just like that, huh. you have an unprecedented power, leo, and we love to see it !

#thqadmin

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findmeinpops · 4 years

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FindMeInPops’ 12 Days of Ficmas: Day Eight - A Cynic’s Christmas (Part Two of Two)

Part One is here.

It’s that time of year again where I try to pump out a drabble or one-shot for each of the twelve days leading up to Christmas! I have a couple already written but some of them will be written by prompt and on request - I have a prompt list that I’ll reblog now, if you want to take a look - so bare with for any editing errors! Enjoy, my loves, and have a happy festive season :)

And quick note, if anyone prefers AO3, the link to my 2019 12 Days of Ficmas collection is here. x

Ship(s): totally platonic Sweet Pea x Female!Reader

Rating: K+

CW(s): homelessness

Reindeer Games: Comet - Traditions

@riverdalebingo: Traditions

Six hours. Six fucking hours, that was how long Y/N was out shopping. Sweet Pea was in bed when he had heard her close the front door. He had crawled from his bed and stuck his head out of his bedroom just in time to see five members of the apartment block staff, plus Y/N, all carrying armfuls of shopping bags through the hallway and into the living room. He was far too sleepy to venture out and ask what she was doing so simply sighed and wandered back to bed. It was probably selfish of him but he had been up early that day to do a shift at the part-time job he had. Y/N insisted he did not need it but he wanted to give some kind of contribution to rent / groceries etc., even if it was so small when compared to Y/N’s contributions.

The next morning, Sweet Pea was woken from a dreamless sleep by Y/N prodding him quite harshly in the arm.

“What…” He grumbled, feeling both groggy and very confused.

“You need to get up, we have stuff to do.” She poked him again. Her voice was far too cheery for the morning and, by the slightly damp hair and coffee in hand, she had been up for a while already.

“I- what? What time is it?”

“It’s 2pm.” Y/N’s tone was akin to that of a chastising mother, as she perched on the edge of the bed. “How did I not know you slept in this late, it’s not healthy.” Sure, they lived in the same apartment but they did not study the same subject, Sweet Pea had a job, and he generally spent most of the time when he was at the apartment in his room. Y/N had no reason to know about Sweet Pea’s sleeping habits but she thought that she would have noticed that they woke up five hours apart.

“What’s not healthy is not getting enough sleep so I would rather sleep until 2pm than be tired all day.” Y/N had to stop herself remarking at ‘all day’ considering he was only awake for the afternoon.

“I guess… We’re going off topic, you need to be up and dressed in twenty minutes, we have stuff to do.” Swiftly standing from the bed, she shoved the mug of coffee into Sweet Pea’s hands before spinning on her heel and marching out of the room.

***

Eighteen minutes later and he was showered and dressed, fighting a yawn as he left his bedroom but he froze in his step. To say he was shocked at the state of the apartment would be the understatement of the century.

Every spare inch and surface was decorated with lights and Christmas ornaments. He had not even seen further than the hallway but he already got the impression that Christmas threw up all over the apartment.

Green garlands adorned the walls, each wrapped with strands of warm-white fairylights, giving the hallway an pleasant glow. The ornaments that had sat on a large dresser tucked in the corner of the hall had been removed and replaced with a small three-foot, fibre-optic Christmas tree; the tips glowed white and were decorated by small red and silver shiny baubles hanging from each branch.

Tentatively, he crept round the corner into the kitchen, not surprised to find that this room had been decorated just as - if not more - liberally as the previous. In addition to the ornaments and lights, neat piles of items, ranging from flour and sugar to more decorations to shopping bags filled with tins and boxes of food. Y/N obviously had a plan and Sweet Pea was terrified of what she was dragging him into.

For the large majority of the time, Sweet Pea did not struggle to say no to people but the exception was always Y/N. She either did not give him a choice or argued and complained until he said yes, her vocal sparring rivalled Sweet Pea’s, or sometimes she just resorted to pouting and saying ‘please’ in the sweetest, butter wouldn’t melt tone that she could muster. However she did it, though, Sweet Pea always struggled to say ‘no’ to his best friend and, knowing that she was doing all of this for his benefit, assured him that there was no way that he would be able to refuse. He would complain, he would argue, but he would not say ‘no’.

“Good, you’re up.” Y/N clapped her hands as she hurried into the kitchen. She inspected the table’s contents for a few seconds before nodding, presumably finding everything she wanted there, and then motioning for Sweet Pea to follow her back into the living room.

“Now, I did the rest of the decorations,” how, Sweet Pea did not know, she had got back at half eleven last night, and this amount of work must have taken hours even if she did have some help, “but, because this is your first Christmas, you must decorate a Christmas tree.”

Sweet Pea did not particularly want to decorate a Christmas tree but Y/N just gave him a look and he quickly obliged.

Y/N pulled a box, filled with brand new fairylights, baubles, and tinsel, along with a seven foot faux Christmas tree, into the centre of the room, before they began to assemble it. If he was completely honest, Sweet Pea found the whole process incredibly therapeutic and maybe enjoyed it too, especially when Y/N began to play Christmas music through her phone, singing quietly along whilst doing awkward but nevertheless adorable bottom-wiggle dancing - kind of like dad dancing but for a twenty one year-old girl.

After the pair had finished haphazardly assembling and decorating the tree, Y/N took a picture. Sweet Pea appreciated Y/N resisting the need to redo all of it, he had managed to make even pre-chosen, colour coordinated decorations look higgledy-piggledy. She seemed to be on a tight schedule though as she hurried him into the kitchen before scooping up the pile of ingredients and laying them out on the worktop.

“Next,” announced as she washed her hands, “we are going to make some gingerbread biscuits.”

“I’ve had gingerbread biscuits before.”

“Sure, but have you ever made gingerbread biscuits and made the entire house smell like a delicious Christmas bakery?” She took Sweet Pea’s silence as his answer. “Exactly. Can you follow a recipe? I need to go and do something in the other room.”

After getting confirmation that he could indeed read and follow written instruction, she scuttled back out of the room, having grabbed a large shopping bag filled with what, Sweet Pea did not know, but it looked heavy.

As always, Y/N had been right. The gingerbread baking in the oven had smelled heavenly and he had no qualms in telling her so. Sweet Pea had accepted a short time into their friendship that Y/N normally knew better when it came to practical things…or most things really.

He guessed that was one of the many benefits of growing up in a wealthy family, no doors were truly closed - money could buy most things and no-one denied the rich an opportunity. She had traveled, she had appreciated many cultures and learnt many things both practical and academic. But that did not mean that he was unable to teach her anything. When they met, Y/N had just moved back to London, without her mother this time, and had a child-like naivety about the world - something that Sweet Pea was lacking to the extreme. Hearing his story had kickstarted the whole process and she had been slowly losing her rose-tinted glasses over the last three years.

Her and Sweet Pea evened each other out in that respect. Y/N had been overwhelmingly naive and Sweet Pea had been overwhelmingly cynical; neither of them had lost that part of them entirely but Sweet Pea had been learning that there were good people in the world and Y/N had been learning that there were bad people as well as coming to the realisation that not everyone had it as easy as she did - this was when she began to donate such a large percentage of her allowance to local charities.

“Sweet Pea!” Y/N not-so-gently shocked him from his reverie. “Stop daydreaming and box up those biscuits, we’re going out.”

As they had packed up the car, Y/N had refused to tell Sweet Pea where they were going but the large number of food and toys in the bags they moved into the boot gave him a clue. His suspicions were confirmed when they pulled outside a nearby homeless shelter.

Sweet Pea was very happy that Y/N had included this in her Christmas Eve plans. The homeless, or nomads as Y/N liked to call them, had an especially tough time during the festive period and the fact that they were able to help them out just a little, maybe bring a bit of joy into their day, was incredibly important to him. One of the many charities that Y/N made regular donations to was the London Homeless and the pair spent many an afternoon volunteering at the local soup kitchen.

“Y/N! Sweet Pea! How great to see you!” Jane, the main organiser for this particular shelter, greeted them each by name, embracing them. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

She helped the pair carry in the bags, a couple of the other volunteers taking the food into the kitchen to be distributed as necessary. Y/N handed Sweet Pea a specific bag, instructing him to take it over to a rickety table in the back corner of the hall. When he opened it, the bag was filled with small red and green stockings, colour coded for either adults or children; within them were hygiene supplies but also a few sweet treats, and toys for the children.

Sweet Pea and Y/N spent several hours there; the shelter had been setting up for the annual nomads’ Christmas dinner, prepared and cooked by a couple of volunteer chefs from local area. The pair joined the staff and the nomads, they all sat down together, they pulled crackers, joked, laughed, and chatted, enjoying the food and company.

Once they had gotten home, they drank Bailey’s and watched The Muppets’ Christmas Carol - of course Y/N had thoroughly enjoyed comparing Sweet Pea to Scrooge - before leaving a brandy and mince pie out for ‘Father Christmas’. They then immediately drank and ate both. And in the morning, Sweet Pea had woken to a filled stocking hanging on the end of the bed.

Y/N had taken the time to plan a few days where she included both the more traditional traditions as well as the more unique ones. Y/N was good for Sweet Pea and Sweet Pea was good for Y/N. They had the best Christmas ever with the person they loved most in the world.

#not my finest work but this took far longer than I thought it was going to...#riverdaleevents #comet: traditions #southsidearchive #sweet pea x reader #sweet pea x female!reader #findmeinpops 12 days of christmas #harry's creations and additions #harry's word creations

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searchingwardrobes · 4 years

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Here’s another story from the universe of my novel What Hindered Love. That book was told completely from Chloe’s point of view, but I have several unpublished scenes from Micah’s point of view. Fittingly, this is Micah’s version of what happened on Valentine’s Day when Chloe thought he was hooking up with another woman.

Summary: Once an addict, always an addict. Especially when wires get crossed on Valentine’s Day. Luckily, all Micah has to do is use the code word “busted,” and his friends are there.

Tagging those who might be interested: @vvbooklady1256 @winterbaby89 @ilovemesomekillianjones @snowbellewells @kday426 @onceuponaprincessworld @ekr032-blog-blog @nikkiemms @bethacaciakay @branlovestowrite @xhookswenchx @thislassishooked @sherlockianwhovian @ultraluckycatnd @flicialy23 @harshini0

Anyone else who wants to be tagged for WHL content, please just let me know!

Spoilers for the novel, obviously, so it’s below the cut:

Micah Barrett should have known that his attempts to ignore the fact that today was Valentine’s Day were doomed to failure. Because if there was anyone he knew who would celebrate such a saccharine holiday with childlike enthusiasm it would be Amanda Swisher, the culinary arts student he was training to be his baking assistant. Oh, and he and Amanda had to report to work at 5 am to construct a cake. Shaped like a castle. With turrets. For a wedding proposal. So yeah, there was that.

He wasn’t surprised to hear Amanda crooning Carrie Underwood’s “Cowboy Casanova” as she whipped up batter, but he would have expected her to forgo the traditional Valentine’s colors. Since her hair was flaming red on its own. But no. Amanda had boldly donned a frothy pink dress topped off with a white cardigan covered in tiny pink and red hearts. Her hair was up in a ponytail, per Micah’s own code in his kitchen (he always shuddered to see all that hair dangling over bowls of batter on Cupcake Wars), but she had used a bit of red tulle to tie it back.

“You’re a walking Whitman’s sampler,” he muttered when he saw her, still rubbing sleep out of his eyes.

“Aw, don’t tell me my mentor, my Yoda of baking, is a Valentine’s Grinch,” Amanda teased back.

“Well, they’re both green, aren’t they?”

Amanda just chuckled good-naturedly and rolled her eyes as she slipped the first pan of batter into the oven. Part of the reason he had picked her for the internship, aside from her brilliant fondant work, was her demeanor. He could be charming, but perky he was not. Especially when stressed over an order, particularly the intricate kind they were constructing today. Amanda’s enthusiasm and positivity was a good balance for his intensity.

Micah looked over the sketches of the massive cake they had to construct. Multiple tiers, multiple levels, three different flavors of cake, four different fillings, not to mention it had to look like a castle, complete with turrets. Their client wanted his girlfriend’s engagement ring sitting on the balcony of one of the turrets. Looking over everything now, Micah thought he may have gotten carried away with his brainstorming.

“This girl better say yes,” Micah muttered as he got to work.

“Oh, she will,” Amanda sighed dreamily, “I mean, it’s a fairy tale proposal. They must really be in love.”

“Stop!” Micah yelped when he noticed the container in her hand.

Amanda startled and checked the label. “Baking soda? Oops! It was sitting right by the powdered sugar. Silly me!”

Micah narrowed his eyes at her. Amanda was a little airheaded perhaps, but she was always careful in her work. Something was up, and he had a feeling he knew what it was.

Hours flew by, and Micah had the main portion of the castle constructed and awaiting Amanda’s magic with icing and fondant. He had the first turret constructed as well but was having difficulty with the balcony meant to hold the ring. Cake was light, and he was worried about the narrow turret holding that kind of weight. Simultaneously, he had a batch of Italian meringue going. With his hands full constructing the turret, he called out to Amanda, who was whipping up raspberry filling.

“Hey, turn the mixer down on that meringue, would you?”

Simultaneously, Micah’s cell phone rang, and Amanda snatched it up, “Hello, Micah Barretts’ phone!”

Micah thought to himself that he needed to tell Amanda not to answer his phone like an over-exuberant sixteen year old, but for now, there was the meringue. Micah laughed, shook his head, and gestured towards the mixer. Amanda squealed as she saw the meringue whipping way too fast and giggled, reaching for the mixer’s switch as she continued her distracted conversation with whoever was on the phone.

“I’m sorry, what was that?”

In her distraction, Amanda flipped the mixer’s switch to high. Meringue flew out of the bowl. Micah was surprised when laughter spilled out of his mouth. Must have been Amanda’s influence. Meringue splashed across his eyes as the turret on the cake-castle started to tilt.

“Amanda! Get over here!”

Micah couldn’t see with the meringue in his eyes, even though he was still laughing. He heard a plop and a muffled curse from Amanda, and then she was beside him.

“Quick, brace it with some pillars,” he instructed, relieved that she knew his kitchen as well as he did. He hated using pillars – they screamed 1980s – but what else could they do? Amanda rescued the turret before the cake could crack by slipping two plastic pillars under the balcony portion. She then wet a towel and began gently wiping the meringue from his eyes. Once he could actually see, he took in Amanda’s appearance. She was similarly covered in meringue, and they both dissolved into laughter. They’d been at this since five am, so it was no wonder they were punch drunk.

“It’s all in your hair,” Amanda gasped.

Micah groaned and ran a hand through his hair, feeling the meringue smear through it. It must have made him look quite the sight, because Amanda dissolved in a fresh fit of giggles. Micah stuck his head in the sink and turned on the tap. When he straightened, rubbing his wet hair with his fingers, Amanda was lifting his cell phone carefully by two fingers from the depths of the bowl of raspberry filling.

“Micah, I am so sorry.”

He took the phone from her carefully, futily attempting to wipe the sticky filling off with paper towels. “Josiah’s gonna kill me,” he groaned. “This is my third phone in six months.”

“You make a habit of dropping phones into your baking?”

Micah shrugged. “Or leaving them too close to a burner on the stove. Who was the call from anyway?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch anything they said.”

Even though the phone was still sticky, Micah pushed the on button. Nothing. He sighed. “It’s ok, Amanda. It wasn’t your fault.” He took the bowl of filling over to the cake layer he had waiting on a cake stand.

Amanda returned to rolling out her fondant and sighed, “I think it was my fault. I’m very distracted today.”

“This wouldn’t have anything to do with the contractor who redid the barn, would it? What was his name again . . . “

He was teasing her, actually. He remembered the man’s name.

“Eric. His name’s Eric.” Amanda blushed enough to match her hair, which was answer enough. “Maybe. We’re going out again tonight.”

Micah paused in spreading raspberry filling and turned to look at Amanda with mock concern. “Third date? On Valentine’s Day? What are this guy’s intentions?”

She rolled her eyes, but smiled as if pleased with his concern. “Calm down, big brother. He’s not that kind of guy. He’s . . . sweet.”

“I’ve never seen him at church.” Five years ago, Micah never would have expected to be grilling someone about a potential suitor’s church attendance. But Amanda volunteered in the nursery at Community Fellowship and sang back up in the praise band on occasion. Her faith was important to her.

Amanda waved off his concern. “He goes to the Baptist church on the other side of town. But, he’s not exactly plugged in there, so he said he might visit Community Fellowship with me sometime.”

“Does he sing or play an instrument?”

Amanda laughed, “You and Hannah always trying to recruit people to the praise team. No, he isn’t musical at all. But he says he loves my voice.”

Amanda blushed again and a dreamy look came over her face. She hummed a little as they continued working, but inevitability she turned the romance talk towards Micah. He was surprised it had taken her this long, honestly.

“So, Micah, do you have any special plans tonight?”

“Yeah, I’m sure there’s a hockey game on tonight,” he answered dryly.

Amanda stopped what she was doing to turn towards him, a hand on her hip. “Micah, I have never seen you date, and it’s not right.”

“Why? I have my business, my son,” my former addiction he silently added. Getting clean and staying clean was a long, difficult process, and it was something few could understand.

“Yes, you’re successful, you’re a good father, you’re a good guy. And well, you’re no Eric, but you’re still not bad on the eyes.” Amanda flicked flour teasingly at him to punctuate her point.

“Oh, I can’t disagree with any of your points,” Micah teased back with a quirk of an eyebrow, “but perhaps I simply haven’t found the right woman.” Chloe’s face floated before his consciousness, but he tamped it down.

“Tina would say yes if you asked her out. I’ve seen the way she looks at you.”

Micah scoffed, “Not my type.”

“But Hannah and Kate told me you have a thing for blondes.”

Only one. Kate and Hannah knew that full well, too, but Amanda was too naïve not to read more into it. Micah straightened from his task carving the cake layers into the shape of the second turret and rolled his shoulders back. “Can we change the subject?”

Amanda may have been naïve, but she had also worked with Micah long enough to pick up on his moods. She made a comment about needing music to work and reached over to where her iPod was docked. When Carrie Underwood’s voice started crooning, he groaned.

“Amanda, what have I repeatedly said about country music?”

She chuckled, “Just teasing.” She switched it to the grunge station and Micah sighed happily as Pearl Jam thrummed through the speakers. “Although why depressing, angst-filled music makes you feel better, I’ll never know.”

Micah tilted his head to the side as Eddie Vedder sang She lies and says she’s in love with him, can’t find a better man, and thought Amanda had a point.

“Actually, you can turn it back. Carrie Underwood’s not so bad.”

***************************************************************

Micah parallel parked his truck into a space outside The Daymark, spotting Chloe’s car a few spaces ahead. Good, she’s still here. He’d replaced the cell phone Amanda had ruined yesterday, and he was glad he didn’t wait until Monday. Chloe’s voicemail sent relief flooding through him, but her text message . . . that had left him equal parts baffled and confused. He pulled it up to read one more time.

I haven’t heard back from you. I’m surprised because this is – you know – important? I’m meeting with the lawyer at The Daymark tomorrow at noon, and I’m hoping it’s all good news. Not that you care. You know, since you’re ignoring me?

Micah could understand Chloe feeling ignored. She was right, it was important news. And she didn’t know his phone was ruined. But if he was reading between the lines correctly – and he usually was where Chloe was concerned – she was upset with him about far more than that.

But he was here now to fix that. As soon as he’d gotten both messages, he had frantically checked his watch and raced to the diner to try and catch Chloe before she left. It was already two, so he had fully prepared himself to miss her. The sight of her car was a beautiful one.

Micah headed down the sidewalk and into the diner, inwardly rehearsing his apology. His eyes found Chloe immediately, and the sight froze him in his tracks. Her head was down, a pretty blush coloring her cheeks. The man across from her held her hands in his, thumbs brushing over Chloe’s knuckles in an intimate gesture. No wonder she was still here two hours later; this wasn’t a business meeting, this was a lunch date! Feeling foolish, Micah turned and headed straight back out the door. He thought he heard Chloe call out after him, but he wasn’t sure. And even if she was, he was too humiliated to face her.

Micah made his way quickly back to the truck, pulling out of his parking space blindly. He was lucky the street was empty. Adam Murray. How could he have been so stupid? The guy was exactly Chloe’s type, and a successful lawyer to boot. Not to mention they had been spending quite a bit of time together.

Micah’s leg started to throb like it hadn’t in years. He pulled over and took several deep breaths, kneading his leg hard with his left thumb. He tilted his head back and thought over all the ways he had learned to deal with the pain: exercise, meditation, prayer, his music. But he knew this pain was more mental – okay, emotional – than physical. So was the desperate desire to numb his pain the way he used to.

With trembling hands, he lifted his phone and hit Ryan Newton’s contact number. When his friend answered, he paused for a moment, and then with a shaky breath, said, “Busted.” He felt a little silly saying it – the code word was Ryan’s idea, though Micah wanted to call it something like “Screw-Up or “Family Disappointment” – but he had to admit he was glad he could convey his need without a lengthy explanation.

“Okay,” Ryan said without hesitation, “I’ll gather the troops. My place is full of rugrats. What about Beau’s man cave?”

“Negative. They’ve renovated it into a kid’s room.”

“Oh right, the adoption thing.”

“My place is fine. I’ll order us a pizza. You just call everyone. Is six good?”

“Yeah, but Logan and I will be there by five. You gonna be ok until then?”

Micah rubbed his leg; the pain was a little more bearable, but more importantly, his urge for pills was gone. “Yeah, but about Logan –“

“Micah!”

“Okay, okay. You’re right. Call Logan. See you at five.”

Micah hung up and slammed his palm hard against his steering wheel. Once an addict, always an addict. How many times had he heard that in rehab? He just really wished he was a stronger man. Maybe then Chloe wouldn’t be on a date with someone else.

*******************************************************

Ryan showed up promptly at five with a six pack of sodas.

“The good thing about your two best friends being a pastor and a recovered alcoholic is they don’t mind swinging back a few Cokes instead of beer,” Ryan quipped as he headed to the kitchen.

“What else have you got there?” Micah asked, gesturing to the plate in Ryan’s hand.

“Homemade chocolate chip cookies via Maggie.”

Micah grinned and grabbed a cookie and a soda just as Logan let himself in. “I come bearing turtle brownies!” he announced, frowning when he saw the cookies. “You guys better eat these too, or Rose won’t let me back in the house.”

“Don’t mind if I do,” Micah said, polishing off his cookie and reaching for a brownie. “The hockey game doesn’t start until 5:30, but the pre-game stuff should be on.”

Logan snatched the remote from Micah’s hand. “Not so fast. We need to talk about how you used the code word. Before Josiah and Beau get here.”

Micah groaned and fell back against the couch, running both hands through his hair. “Crisis averted, guys. Can we just leave it at that?”

“No, we can’t,” Logan said firmly. “That’s the whole point of me being your mentor, remember? Now what was your trigger? Emotional? Physical? Stress related?”

Emotional. He really didn’t want to get into this. But Ryan and Logan were both patient men, and the silence dragged on. “Chloe, okay. Are you happy?”

“Is this still the Scott thing?” Ryan asked across the kitchen island.

“No, he’s dropped that, thank God.”

“Well, that’s great news!” Logan enthused, slapping Micah on the knee. Micah thought about how Logan and Rose were the ones who introduced Chloe to Adam and suddenly had the irrational desire to punch his friend.

It fell quiet again as his friends waited for him to elaborate. “Chloe told me she was meeting with the lawyer today at The Daymark, so I thought I would stop by there. It wasn’t a meeting – it was a date.”

“And that bothers you?” Ryan asked.

Micah chuckled and craned his neck to look back into the kitchen where Ryan was leaning against the island. “Yes, it bothers me, Pastor Ryan. I’m a PK, remember? I know when you’re shifting into counseling mode.”

Ryan chuckled and made his way into the living area. “Sorry, then I’ll shift back to friend mode.” He plopped down into the recliner in the corner and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “Why don’t you just tell Chloe how you feel?”

Micah shook his head and looked down at his feet. He thought for a few minutes before looking back up at R

yan. “As much as I’ve hurt her, all I really want is for her to be happy. Adam is a good guy, so as much as it hurts . . . I can’t get in the way of that.”

Ryan narrowed his eyes, and Micah could tell the wheels in his head were turning. “Maggie and Chloe have gotten close, you know. I can’t say any-“

Micah held up one hand, “No need to explain. If anyone understands pastor confidentiality, it’s me.”

Ryan nodded once. “All I’ll say is, I still think you and Chloe need to have an honest talk.”

“When she has a shot at something better?”

“Wait a second,” Logan cut in, “who says Adam is better?”

“He’s never broken her heart, for one.” Micah sighed with relief when the doorbell rang. “That’ll be the pizza.”

He rose from the couch and addressed his two best friends as he walked backwards towards the door. “You’ve successfully talked me down off the ledge, so operation successful. Can we now drop the subject of my non-existent love life?”

Being men, they both shrugged and Ryan picked up the remote to turn to the game. Micah sighed with relief as he fished his wallet out of his back pocket and turned towards the door. His busted leg no longer throbbed with phantom pain. He had an arsenal of solutions at his disposal to deal with that kind of pain.

His busted heart was another story.

#what hindered love #my novel #my book #micah barrett #micah's stories #busted heart #shameless self promotion

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loyalflutist · 5 years

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The Importance of Education (F!Byleth x Edelgard - NSFW)

Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: N/A Words: 7,698 Summary: Edelgard must learn everything around her in order to become an efficient emperor for the Adrestian Empire. However, what she didn’t know was just how inexperienced she is in the form of passionate lovemaking.

A/N: It’s been 6 years since I’ve last sinned. Have fun with this! I feel like my age is slowly catching up to me since I’m having even more difficulty writing in this genre compared to my 17-year-old self back then.

Education is important to a person’s growth. Without it, a person’s growth is stunted. Types of conversations would be limited. Actions would lack variety. The next generation would lose plenty of opportunities and lessons. Lacking education could easily lead to ostracization from the community. The consequences are fatal. However, a human’s brain is unable to store countless information. It isn’t a supercomputer. A supercomputer wouldn’t even be able to store limitless data into its system either.

That means it’s okay to not know everything, right? Dimitri, Claude, and even her professor, Byleth, admits that there was nothing wrong with this.

“Edelgard, even I don’t know everything. My family has ruled over the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus without worldly knowledge. I am certain I can follow after their footsteps.”

“Nothin’ wrong with not being the all-knowing-goddess, right? Sometimes it’s better to be ignorant. Knowing too much could lead to your downfall…”

“Edelgard, there’s so much to learn in this world. As a professor, even I don’t know everything. I don’t even think I’m a good professor— Oh, you flatter me. I’m glad you think otherwise. Still, I learn alongside my students. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself, okay?”

For Edelgard, this is unacceptable. She must allow her brain to absorb all that it could. For the Adrestian Empire future emperor, a single detail not known could very well lead her nation into demise. The 18-year-old was like a sponge. Various tactical plans and ideas were tested in chess duels. Subjects ranging from complex physics in the field of magic to survival skills needed for the wilderness are mastered. Extracurricular activities such as the art of being a seamstress and singing in a choir are sought after. Interactions with Byleth’s colleagues and volunteer positions (such as being a weekly chef at the monastery’s kitchen) expanded her social network.

Edelgard snagged at every single piece of knowledge like a hungry beast.

She would become an emperor.

She would reclaim what her father had lost.

She would lead a fulfilling life with her lover, Byleth.

Yes… Knowledge was especially crucial for their relationship.

It was a dinner during the time of her birthday that led to the planted seed. Edelgard had not hoped for much. Actually— she foresaw that there would be no results! They had spent countless hours together, but none dare led to a relationship beyond platonic. A student and a professor. A noble and a commoner. A princess and a mercenary. The only thing they had in common was their status as warriors on the battlefield. Otherwise, they were never on equal footing.

Edelgard wanted to close the gap. The birthday date was the most opportune of time to confess her amorous sins to the very person she fell for. A small cake dashed with whip creams and decorated with strawberries sat between the two. Had it not been for the cup of sweet herbal tea found in the mountains, Edelgard would have lost so much of the confident composure. The tremors in her delivery, the rapid heartbeat, the occasional twitch from her eye, the chewing of her lower lip, and the gnawing fear were evident.

“I love you, Byleth.”

Dread overcame her thoughts as the older female no older than by three years hardly reacted. There was no flushing of the cheeks, there was no change to the respiration rate, there were no subtle movements… She simply stared back at the recently-turned 18-year-old. Edelgard had balled the hands on her lap into fists. How humorous. Was her professor disgusted with her? Same-sex relationships were not uncommon, but that does not mean everyone agreed to it. It just wasn’t their preference.

The girl remembered her palms becoming clammy. Edelgard felt her mouth go dry as that particular reason crossed through her mind.

What if Byleth wasn’t into girls?

“I love you too, Edelgard.”

But it never came to that. Byleth embraced Edelgard’s forward nature and never once shamed the young lady of her sexuality. The unfolding scene almost felt like it came out of a left field. Yes, to an extent. Byleth had never once expressed romantic feelings to any of her students or colleagues. Not even Sylvain or Dorothea could rattle the ex-mercenary with their flirtatious personality. To respond with a smile, a tinge of pink discoloration upon her cheeks, and the sudden hug was not how her professor would have acted!

What Edelgard had forgotten was Byleth’s true nature. Despite the facts that a concrete slab has more expression than Byleth in her waking hours, underneath the stoic demeanor is that of a young woman who wishes to be with others. The mercenary life and community that she used to surround herself with thickened the outer shell. Making allies was easy. Making friends was not.

Edelgard had noticed how much time the instructor met with Jeralt and Manuela during days off after Byleth’s explanation.

“I didn’t know how to approach you.”

She was, in a way, emotionally stunted. Expressing them was difficult as she was used to concealing them as a mercenary. That stunt came to erode and was replaced with growth during the first two months at the monastery. The cheeky personality that everyone has come to adore bore fruit. What Byleth was not prepared for was the concept of love. Yes, she loves her father. However, the older male would always remark to his colleagues and curious students from all three Houses about the lack of physical affection she showcased to him.

“Love is a foreign concept to her,” he shook his head after Edelgard had approached him one day. “I can tell how she is feeling, but only because I’m her father. I could only hope she meets someone special like my wife to help break her out of her shell.”

Edelgard had no way knowing that that special person was none other than herself… and she would have never known had she not initiated.

They shook hands on a deal. The two made a promise to keep their relationship a secret until Edelgard graduated. Both did not want to be at the center of gossips, especially in the case tension arises between the three nations and church. Comically, Byleth and Edelgard were unable to pry the hands from the rest of the Black Eagles as their curious nature were too much to handle. Not that the Black Eagles weren’t supportive, of course. They cheered on for the two and sealed their lips about the private affair to the rest of the students and staffs. Even Hubert gave the green light… once he had given Byleth a long, brother-like lecture on dating Edelgard in private.

“If I ever see, hear, or sense Edelgard in distress because of you, I will have no choice but to remove you.”

How brotherly of him!

Nevertheless, nothing could prepare her for a very green relationship with her professor. Textbooks held little to no knowledge about love. In lieu of it, fairytales and wondrous legends substituted the dense material. It’s unfortunate that the ones she’s heard of never went beyond a kiss… Not that Edelgard even knew that you could do something more intimate than share a pleasant peck on the lips. It was only recently that she decided to pursue this new concept thanks to the encouragement from Ferdinand and Dorothea.

“So long as Hubert doesn’t hear about this, then you’re totally fine!” Dorothea chirped when the three ate lunch together. The fashionable commoner tucked a stray brown hair behind her ear as she sipped on her juice. “Still, I can’t believe that you didn’t know about THIS.”

“It’s a shame my rival is so oblivious about it,” Ferdinand shut his eyes and shook his head, a hand rested on his temple. “My Edelgard won’t be able to get married and have kids!”

Edelgard’s brow twitched.

“How entertaining for you to speak like I am not present,” she stared at the male. “I am also not yours, Ferdinand. I have—”

“Teach,” he finished. His eyes opened and a playful grin ran across his lips. “Yeah yeah, we got the message.”

“If you had known, I prefer you focus that energy on finding someone special yourself.”

“Relax~ I will. No promises that it’ll just be as scandalous as yours with Teach~”

“Ferdinand! Why must you make everything a competition between us both?”

Before the two nobles were able to launch into verbal warfare, Dorothea immediately interfered with a long and theatrical “okay!” It’s astonishing that no one else in the cafeteria turned their heads towards the noisy trio’s direction.

“Goodness, both of you, please have some class!” the young lady scolded. It was something of a sight to see someone in her social standing act this way. It almost feels like the role was temporarily reversed… Dorothea shifted her focus onto Edelgard and raised an index finger up like an older sister. “Edelgard, I recommend that the best time to attack is during the evening.”

“I can’t do it now?”

“Unless you’re a rabbit in heat, I suggest you do this privately with the professor. I’m sure you don’t want anyone to hear you both.”

And so Edelgard heeded to their advice after one last review of her battle plan with Ferdinand and Dorothea. She admits, there were three moments in her life where she felt the jitters. The first was the inevitable fate of becoming an emperor for the Adrestian Empire. The second was the dangerous practical lessons against bandits and rebels of the monastery. The third is facing Byleth with an outlandish request. Edelgard felt the palms of her hands moistened. She placed them on her lap and did her best to wipe the sweats away, only to no avail.

Should she back away from the plan? The rubbing of her palms increased its pace. No… That wouldn’t be right. All that hard work of owing her shameful romantic inexperience to Dorothea and Ferdinand cost dearly. Edelgard’s hands slowed down to a stop. Maybe she should delay this. But how long can she push it back?

The sun eventually began to set on a Friday evening as she pondered long and hard. Time was running extremely short. Edelgard needs to decide her next course of action right here, right now. As for her professor, the young lady in her early 20s had just finished preparation for tomorrow. This upcoming weekend consisted of the usual field trips to train for Saturday and a day off for Sunday. It was the usual schedule as a teacher.

‘ Why am I always out on the field, but the other professors aren’t? ‘

Correction: it was the usual schedule as a teacher for Byleth exclusively. Because she was a professional mercenary alongside her father in the past, it made her an ideal model to guide the future prince and princess of their nation compared to other educators. Though Manuela and Hanneman were in charge of the Blue Lions and Golden Deers, they weren’t frequently chosen to handle sensitive missions and tasks ordered by the archbishop herself. It was always “Byleth this” and “Byleth that.”

Byleth loves to teach her students. She really does. She may have various hiccups in her teaching methods, and she is eccentric due to her lack of knowledge in social normality, but she cares for her students. Though it doesn’t hurt to have a break for a bit… right? The other professors were cycled through in a way to spread their workload for Saturday. Why can’t she have that same treatment? She can get tired too!

A weary sigh. The instructor adjusted her hold on the notebook. At least there’s Sunday to look forward to… Byleth let a small smile crack through her frustration. She continued through the empty field and into a hidden narrow passage as a short-cut, her mind set on spending this luxurious day off with fishing on a Sunday.

An imaginary thought bubble floated above her head, a poorly doodled version of Byleth smiling with a fishing rod in one hand and a fish in another. Oh, how she misses this peaceful hobby. Maybe she should invite Edelgard out too.

That seems to have brightened her dull features. The thought bubble began to include the poorly drawn noble shuffling next to the teacher. Edelgard also held a fishing rod in one hand and a smaller fish in another. Just like Byleth, she too was grinning from ear to ear.

‘ Let’s do just that. ‘

She nodded to herself.

“Aren’t you lovesick.” The familiar voice of Sothis pierced through Byleth’s eardrums. As if by magic, Sothis appeared out of thin air and floated beside the walking teacher. The young girl crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. “You’ve changed since you and Edelgard hooked up.”

It has always intrigued Sothis of Byleth’s and Edelgard’s relationship. Although the green-haired care more for the professor whom she has always watched since the time of birth, she cannot help but find more questions than answers. The concept of love is complex. Not everyone views it the same way as the next person. When Byleth struggled with her emotional attachments towards Edelgard before the confession, Sothis had always comforted her. She knew it was not in her place to tell the young woman what was right and what was wrong. All she could do was lend a listening ear.

Just what exactly drew Byleth to Edelgard, and what drew Edelgard to Byleth? The two had opened up to each other during the birthday date, but Sothis excused herself to sleep out of respect. Now she feels a tinge of regret for the missed opportunity. Not that it mattered much in the end. Whatever sweet nectar they poured together taught her host to express more of her emotions. She was even able to chuckle and laugh! It was a huge improvement from the teasing smirk that glossed over her lips for a split second.

Sothis let out a sigh. “Frankly, I’m in awe that you are able to keep your relationship under the rug.”

Byleth shot a glance at the floating woman. “I think it’s best no one outside of the Black Eagles know about this,” she murmured. “I won’t know what to do.”

“Feel free to use a bit of my power to get out of it if you’re ever in a pinch. It’s meant for battle, but I’ll make it an exception this time around.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

Sothis sure acts like a mother to Byleth. Then again, she’s been with the professor since who-knows-when. At birth? After birth? When she became a teenager? No one knew the answer, especially from Byleth herself.

Now out of the short-cut route, the teal-haired spotted her bedroom. Unlike her father and other professors, her sudden transfer into the educational institution gave Rhea and Seteth little room to prepare a private office. The best they could do was squeeze her into a spare commoner room on the dormitory’s first floor. It was small, but warm and cozy at least. The last thing Byleth needed was to share rooms with an unfamiliar face on the first day.

She stood in front of the locked door and fumbled for the key in her pockets. Since it was a Friday evening, many students and staffs all congregate in the cafeteria for today’s special menu, prayed to the Goddess Seiros at the church, and visited the marketplace. The remaining few were either sneaking outside of the monastery’s safety net for a little adventure of their own or practicing in the training arena with Catherine or Shamir. That meant all dormitory floors were completely empty, save it for Byleth.

As Sothis watched Byleth unlock the door, the instructor went back into a blissful, vivid imagination of fishing with Edelgard. Now the scrawled image of the teacher and student sat next to each other on the wooden platform, their fishing rods out and ready for an exciting session.

‘ I hope we can catch a big fish to cook and eat. ‘

“Byleth.”

The daydreaming sequence came to a screeching halt. Byleth tumbled backward from tripping on her own feet and let out a faint yelp. Sothis couldn’t catch her host. The transparent arms aren’t exactly used for catching anything physical! Luckily, Edelgard was there to catch her. Just like a noble figure in various stories, the shorter female had swooped in, Byleth landed into the shorter’s chest face-first, and Edelgard’s arms wrapped around the older woman.

“Are you alright, Professor?”

Byleth blinked in Edelgard’s embrace. A flash of heat trickled into her cheeks.

“You startled me!”

“I apologize for my carelessness. I did not mean to scare you like that.”

“That’s okay.”

The two parted—Temporarily, that is. Byleth was about to reach out, touch Edelgard’s face, and lean in for a small smooch. It was their usual way of greeting each other when no one was around. Since Edelgard had also saved her from the doom of falling, she would express gratitude too. Instead, she was greeted with her back against the dormitory building’s wall near her room, nose centimeters away from her girlfriend’s, and her girlfriend’s hands planted near her head. Since the future lord is shorter than Byleth, from the distant, it looked like Edelgard was bullying the educator. For Byleth, she thinks otherwise!

Edelgard became rough! She’s taking dominance! Just what in the world is going on?!

Their breaths tickled each other’s skin. Edelgard’s expression remained firm. Byleth’s features deepened its shade of red. Beads of sweat begin to form on the teacher’s skin. She gulped. Soon, she felt the corner of her lips quiver. If there was ever a moment when the usually stoic woman would melt into a puddle of mess, it would be whenever Edelgard becomes intimate.

“El? What… do you think you’re… doing?”

“Wall slam.”

Byleth’s eyes nearly boggled out of its sockets.

“…excuse me?”

“This is a wall slam.”

Oh goodness, what is Edelgard trying to achieve here?! Byleth knew what a wall slam too, by the way! The professor isn’t THAT dense! Byleth felt her breath hitch as the young lady leaned forward. She braced for a kiss… only for the student to near her ear. Then, with a tinkly whisper,

“I want to have sex with you.”

“…”

Did she… just…

No, that can’t be it.

“…”

…she said it, didn’t she?

Byleth felt her entire body freeze up. The heat was already unbearable from their proximity, and the ex-mercenary’s hand loosened. A notebook fell onto the cold slab underneath their feet with a faint thud. Other than the item, the air became still and the silence filled it. Byleth heard her heartbeat thumping. It was slow but abnormally loud to the point it reached her eardrums. She’s never been this shook in her life. Not even in the heat of battle, littered with death-defying injuries and mental fatigue had ever shaken her to this extent! She shakily exhaled. Their eyes stared into each other once Edelgard separated from her ear.

“Did you… just say you want to have sex with me?” she blinked. “That’s what I heard… or think I heard, right?”

“Do you doubt me, Byleth?” Edelgard tilted her head. “Your silly expression says otherwise.”

She wasn’t wrong. The Adrestian Empire’s princess hit a bullseye instead. Granted, the teacher had fantasies about doing it with Edelgard, but never really initiated it. Two things had held her back: if Edelgard was ready and if there was ever a time to do it. Having their first time be a quickie would be a real buzzkill. The older female gathered scraps of her logical processes to formulate a rare, squeaky response.

“It doesn’t hurt to double-check.”

It’s no good. Byleth can’t seem to tear her gaze away from Edelgard’s. Those eyes that smolder with intensity, the way the noble angled her body towards the other, the double entendre questions that follow afterward, Byleth is powerless against the empowered female. If anything, their roles are clearly reversed. Another dry swallow came from the teal-haired. That was Edelgard’s cue to affectionately kiss her teacher. Abrupt, but it was much needed. Their eyes closed momentarily at the moment. Another tender kiss on the lips. Simple, but it always seems to draw upon pleasure.

When they parted with bated breaths, Byleth embraced her lover once the other lowered her arms. The instructor buried her face into Edelgard’s shoulder. She deeply inhaled the subtle flowery fragrance. It was not long until she nuzzled into her school’s dark uniform.

“Are you sure about this?” she quietly murmured. “I don’t want you to feel rushed.”

If anything, it would kill Byleth if Edelgard was under the impression that this was a must. Patience is a part of a relationship. She could always wait until Edelgard was ready. Besides, they’re at the midst of growing tensions within this continent. The girls’ love affair could always be in the back burner. The youngster squeezed her girlfriend in response.

“I wanted this, Byleth. If anything, it was my decision.”

There’s nothing wrong with forgetting about the war, even if it’s just for one night.

“Hubert would never allow this though,” Edelgard grumbled. “If he catches us, I don’t think he’ll ever let me out of his sight ever again.”

“Let’s not get caught then.”

When they entered into Byleth’s bedroom, the youngest did not hesitate to lock the door from behind. The room was lit with a nearby lantern. Decorations hung about in the room of the good memories Byleth’s made during her time as a mercenary and as a mentor. Stacks of books and scrolls were tucked in the corner. The desk hosting a personal journal and calendar for the school year. By coincidence, the room upheld an amorous vibe. The professor had to pat herself on the back for keeping the room this way most of the time. It would be awkward if it were a preference to chaos.

Byleth was just able to toss her notebook onto the desk’s surface when she felt a rough tug. The role reversal continued as Edelgard shoved her lover down onto the tidied mattress. Hands by her head, Byleth’s covered chest rose and fell with each breath. The ex-mercenary was opened to the noble. The princess climbed on top of Byleth like a sly cat.

It was clear who was dominant at this moment. Byleth cracked a brief smile in admiration of the brave young lady. The first step into bypassing the boundary and it would be Edelgard who leads. Though there was one little thing Edelgard had forgotten to disclose... and it became prominent when their staring session lasted longer than five seconds.

“El?” she breathed. “Have I lost you to my beautiful eyes?”

“Perhaps.”

But nothing was advancing. The two were fixated in their current position. Not a single inch had budged, and not a single disturbance was felt. She allowed a couple more second tick by from the nearby wall clock.

Still no progress.

Byleth raised an eyebrow.

“Um… Edelgard—”

“Professor, I don’t know what to do next.”

…oh. So, it appears that it slipped from Edelgard’s mind on how inexperienced she is. Ferdinand and Dorothea may have taught her the ropes of getting their professor heated and riled up, but they obviously left out the more explicit contents from their explanations. A shade of red, albeit from embarrassment, discolored the noble’s cheeks. Byleth readjusted her posture so she was able to cup Edelgard’s face. The movement caught the leader of Black Eagles off guard. Then, the educator squished her cheeks.

“Why didn’t you say so earlier?” she chuckled. “Tell me the truth, El. The reason you want to have sex is that you want to learn more about it, am I wrong?”

Edelgard’s facial features twisted into a mix of shame and timidity. Her eyes began to shift around as she mumbled, “Yes.” And what better way to learn about it than with someone you love? Besides, her classmates told her that it was the next step in bonding together. Edelgard clearly wants their relationship to strengthen without it becoming stale.

“Good girl.” Byleth immediately nuzzled with her girlfriend’s nose. They made brief contact with their foreheads before the teacher slid her hands down to the female’s side. Edelgard let out a yelp once their positions flipped. Now on her back, the youngster’s respiration rate picked up knowing what will happen next. Her professor straddled the noble and began to shed her thick overcoat. “You chose the right teacher.”

Frankly, Byleth had never done this with someone. That doesn’t mean she hadn’t witnessed it being done.

It was accidental. She swears upon the Goddess of Sieros that it was purely an accident. The mercenaries never had roots and were always camping and sleeping outdoors. There was barely any sort of privacy, yet kids were being reproduced in her father’s group. Clearly, the members demonstrated intercourses at the quiet times during nightfall. The majority of the mercenaries were at least courteous enough to step away from the camp so their loud moans and groans weren’t heard. Unfortunately, the minority did it right at the premise. Byleth had seen it all from beginning to end as a teenager.

Traumatizing as it may be, at least she’s gained valuable knowledge. Now it was time to put it to use with someone she deeply cares for.

The older woman had now rid of all her armors and stylistic leggings, leaving her left with a white undershirt and wear. Observing Edelgard, she placed both hands on the female’s abdomen.

“How do you feel?”

“Excited… but also scared,” the noble breathed.

“Scared?”

“I’ve never done it and I’ve never heard about this till today.”

“Huh. How did you learn about it?”

“Ferdinand and Dorothea.”

Byleth blinked. “Why am I not surprised.”

“You aren’t?”

“Ferdinand is always a gentleman who tried his best to woo the ladies. Kind of shocked that he still hasn’t found anyone—well, aside from you, that is. Dorothea is always flirting with everyone, so that was predictable.”

“You know them all too well.”

“It’s my job to know my students,” she shrugged. The professor leaned down and proceeded to undo Edelgard’s top attire piece by piece. As her fingers worked on the buttons, Byleth’s eyes twinkled. “That means I get to know more about you too.”

Edelgard felt beads of sweat fly out of her head.

“Byleth, please go easy on me…”

“I will.” Now that the buttons are off, the ex-mercenary gave a quick peck on the girl’s nose. “Let me know if it’s too much for you. I can stop at any time for you.”

“Okay.”

Once Edelgard nodded, the teal-haired started with the first step. A kiss is in order. They may have smooched many times, but none of them rivaled this one. It started off as something simple. Their lips captured one another. Eventually, Byleth’s tongue began to poke, prod, and suck at the sealed sensitive body part. Edelgard’s eyes widened and her lips instinctively parted for a groan. This newly-form entranceway easily allowed the mentor to slip her tongue in. Accompanied by the hand motions of slowly feeling and brushing the student’s concealed chest, sides, stomach, and arms, this eased Edelgard into a world full of bliss.

“Mm…”

They parted. Hot, fast breaths tickled their noses as their eyes were fixated on one another. Then, they resumed where they left off, their tongues tangled and tasting each other. Faint moans came from Edelgard as she realized just how good it felt. It was nothing like she’s ever experienced in her lifetime! For Byleth, she was somewhat in awe of how she’s making the princess tingle from her touches. Edelgard would groan into her mouth as she pressed onward. No wonder why the mercenaries were always trying to hook up with one another outside of battle. This felt amazing.

“I… I never knew you can kiss this way,” Edelgard panted in-between. “Byleth, please teach me more.”

The professor felt an inner switch click on. It was rare for the rising lord to plead. Byleth felt a strange desire to hasten through the lessons and go straight for the main course. However, she internally squeezed the animalistic cravings to a minimum and planted a peck on the student’s lips with a smile.

“I’ll teach you everything, El.”

The second step, the neck. Byleth leaned in to plant soft, fluttering kisses upon the exposed skin. Edelgard felt the heat rise from her head and crawl down to her core. It was different from receiving it on the lips. Although it was not as sensitive as the pink flesh, their current circumstances intensified her sense of touch. She gasped when her teacher gently sucked on areas where she pressed her lips. It was ticklish. The student immediately grabbed ahold of Byleth’s arms and curled her fingers inward, her body slightly squirming.

“Sensitive, aren’t you?” Byleth breathed upon the bare skin.

Edelgard intentionally tightened her hold on the dominant figure. Between her groans, she mewled, “S-Stop asking me those—ah, those questions.”

Byleth’s eyes darkened like a predator. “You’re too cute.”

The next step was one of the sensitive parts of a human’s body. As they were females, their size was far bigger than those from their male counterparts. Byleth’s hands slowly spread apart the upper uniform as she continued to occupy the girl’s neck, allowing the bountiful, now-bare breasts to bare themselves into this world.

She distanced herself to get the full view of Edelgard’s upper body. The pair are so pure and in pristine shape. Not a single battle scar tattooed themselves on the girl’s skin. (Excluding a surgical operation near her ribcage and arms. Those scars had mostly faded.) Compared to the instructor’s battle-worn body, Edelgard was the definition of perfection. Byleth let the word “beautiful” slip from her mouth. This caused the beet red noble to cross her covered arms almost instantly.

“Do we really need to include this in the curriculum?”

Byleth laughed quietly and gently urged Edelgard’s arms apart. It took some time, but the merciful strength conveyed its message successfully. The white-haired exposed herself once more to her teacher with quivering lips. Edelgard had absolutely no idea what was going to happen next as her teacher continued to shed her top attire. She resisted the temptation to flee half-naked from the bedroom.

“Ah!”

Her breath got caught in her throat. The aristocratic female was startled by her lover’s hands’ contact with her breasts. Though they’ve touched each other before when tending to their wounds or bathing, none of them were meant for reasons far more intimate. Edelgard nearly slapped those naughty hands away. The female fisted the bedsheets in lieu of it. Byleth proceeded to massage the mounds with great care as if she were making pottery. She encompassed the pair and gave it a squeeze. A moan escaped from Edelgard. The instructor’s thumbs soon toyed with the hardened tips, rubbing them with her index. Another moan crackled out from her girlfriend. Seems like the mentor is doing something right. Pleased, Byleth continued to pour affection into them as the noble squirmed underneath. Had it not been for the professor’s straddling, she would have been bucked off the mattress!

Hickeys were carefully littered amongst the royal’s neck, the tortuous pleasant waves continued to assault the young lady. Edelgard’s fists tightened its hold on the crumpled bedsheets as Byleth’s adventurous hands twitched and toyed the sensitive tip of her breasts. Another blissful wave washed in while her mind narrowly focused on the electric touches. She jerked from the ministrations as it grew rougher. Whimpers and ragged panting disrupted the perfect imagery everyone envisioned from the noble. Words won’t ever accurately describe this burning desire to moan every passing second.

One hand was eventually removed. Although it should’ve eased the intensity, it was, instead, substituted with Byleth’s mouth.

“Hnngh!?”

Byleth swirled her tongue around it and gave it the occasional suck. Such a foreign object that circulates around the tip of the prized area, this drove the younger girl crazy. Edelgard squeezed her eyes shut and stifled a much louder groan. Any lingering fear that possessed the student now eroded away. These touches sent chilling sensations that shortly transformed into sweet, burning euphoria.

The spare hand massaged the supple mound one last time before it casually left the premise. Byleth had another goal in mind as it trailed downward. It tickled Edelgard in midst of her sexual high. Her fingertips brushed upon the hems of Edelgard’s skirt. That snapped the royal’s eyelids open as her professor raised her head. Their eyes locked with each other. One was breathing as though she ran a marathon, one was breathing as though she had completed a meditation.

“Edelgard… how are you feeling?”

“Spare me the questions, Professor,” the princess scoffed lightly. “You know I can’t answer that.”

“That’s okay. Your body told me everything.”

“You—”

Edelgard wanted to grab her teacher’s cheeks and pull on them. It wasn’t a very regal way of handling the cheeky attitude of Byleth, but the girl was already flustered enough in her current state, she needn’t any more of it. The ex-mercenary bit the bottom of her lip as she glanced at the skirt. She lifted herself up from straddling Edelgard and clung to the edges of the clothing.

“I’m going to take these off.”

“…okay…”

She didn’t sound sure. There wasn’t any resistant… So that means Edelgard gave the green light. Still, the flushed girl’s expression held a mixture of other emotions. Byleth smirked as she slowly pulled down the piece of article. Pop quiz time.

“As your professor, let me give you a pop quiz.”

“Byleth, really?”

“You’ve asked to be taught.”

“I didn’t mean it THAT way!”

Edelgard shifted her legs as the skirt bypassed her knees. Though her cheeks are flamed, the white-haired felt the tension in her core slightly loosen. She frowned and felt irritated. This was going to kill their mood. Luckily, Byleth isn’t so oblivious as to leave her lover sexually frustrated. The teacher has seen it happen one too many times with her old mercenary allies.

A flick of her wrist chucked the dark skirt out of the way. Now working on the red tights, Byleth presented the question.

“How are babies made?”

“…I’ve always thought the Goddess Sieros bestowed them to the parents.”

“Who told you that?”

“Rhea.”

“Urk…”

That was awkward. Dorothea and Ferdinand could at least help their teacher out by explaining this to Edelgard! Or rather, the blame should be entirely placed on Rhea. Who in Fodlan would use the goddess to explain this natural phenomenon? Sure, the archbishop is a holy maiden that should not be tainted. But wasn’t the main point of the Officer’s Academy was to also teach students the reality of the world? An imaginary bead of sweat ran down the side of her face as she finally took off everything except the undergarment. Byleth gave a little huff.

“That’s wrong. This…” Byleth placed her finger on Edelgard’s exposed stomach. With an index finger, she slowly dragged its tip all the way till it hit the white barrier. It was somewhat moist on the single layer that protects the most treasured part of a woman’s body. The noble jolted and gasped as Byleth gently rubbed the wet fabric with a single finger. “This is how babies are made.”

Edelgard scrambled after a response. Any kind of response, really, to hide the squeaks and inconsiderably loud pants that emitted from her direction. It was a mind-boggling experience. How could a single finger tapping and rubbing lightly spark so much pleasure? It was like firecrackers! A long groan resonated from her throat when Byleth vertically swiped the slender finger at a lazy pace.

“Byleth— Hah…"

It was getting out of hand. The younger girl knew that body wanted this. This body wanted to embrace the spicy touches and feel her teacher’s touches to its fullest extent. As much as Edelgard wished to stay dignified in the middle of intercourse, her desperate expression and wiggling body says otherwise.

“I-It feels good,” she whispered.

Byleth’s eyes blackened once more as she had both hands pull the last lower garment out of the way. Just like the skirt, it was flung to the floor. She then leaned forward and closed in on Edelgard’s ear. Sweet nectar dripped from her faint words. Edelgard shuddered in response.

“I’ll make sure you feel even better, El.”

There was no hesitation in her next action. Using the same index finger that had pressed against the white underwear, Byleth copied her original move set on the bare flesh. The slender finger continued to swipe up and down, left and right with flicks. Unbearable gratification of such delicious feelings shot up from that one spot all the way to Edelgard’s brain in flashes. Edelgard struggled to keep her voice down as her body squirmed. This caused Byleth to drape an arm over one of the legs to keep her girlfriend from launching her to the opposite side of the room. Of course, this was to make sure she has plenty of space to work on the sensitive folds.

“Byleth— Agh!”

Nothing was stopping the pleasure train from crashing in. Soon, it was getting difficult for the young lady to keep her respiration rate consistent. Edelgard’s heart was pounding wildly against her chest. She feared that she might overheat from the session! Alas, that was not the case as she had enough willpower to stay conscious from the sudden spike in euphoria. A cry left Edelgard’s mouth when Byleth’s thumb pressed against the clit. She applied pressure at the nub a few times in successions before resting it between her index and thumb.

A pause. Byleth glanced upward. Past the naturally spread legs, the partially clothed Edelgard trembled. The student’s chest rose and fell at a fast pace, back still laid upon the soft furniture. Edelgard’s gaze was jumbled as she could hardly think. This small break won’t last forever, though. They were in the middle of the course.

“This is the most sensitive part of a woman’s body,” she explained and pinched the clit. That elicits another outcry from Edelgard. Byleth kneaded it between her fingertips as if it were a small ball, causing the poor noble to jerk her hips upward. Byleth grunted. The professor applied extra force into her arm in order to keep the legs from sending her to Brigid. “Y-You see, when we are in our mother’s womb, both male and female don't have noticeable sex during development.”

Not that Edelgard was paying any attention to the lecture. The sensation was powerful and overwhelming. If a man derives extreme pleasure from his testicle, then for a woman, it would be their clitoris. (As Byleth elaborates in the background, it’s an underdeveloped version of a male’s testicle.) It was building up. The strange, alienated bubble that kept on producing tiny fireworks within her core increased its intensity.

“Nnngh—! Byleth!”

“…so as you can see, it’s something to keep in mind.”

“Byleth!”

How could her girlfriend still be chatting away while she’s pleasuring her?! Edelgard would like to have a word with her professor, but she was too bothered to care. All forms of her sanity were thrown right out the window when Byleth slowed her rubdown. The teal-haired woman faintly smiled at the frustrated Adrestian Empire’s princess. Oh, how much she loves Edelgard. Just hearing her scream out her name is music to her ears.

“I’m surprised you’re all riled up from my fingers. There are other ways to make you feel good too.”

“What are you— Hey, w-wait! Don’t go down there— AH!”

This was a first for the ex-mercenary, but she decided to tackle it head-first. The fingers were replaced with something drastically different. A strong, but small, muscular muscle had just brushed its rough surfaces against Edelgard’s most prized area of her body. This made the noble twitch and shake from the new texture. Euphoria coursed through her vein as blood pooled into the fleshed. The noble immediately reached down to hold onto her older girlfriend’s head. Byleth was seen to have both of her hands strongly grip against the thighs of the other female, her face buried at the blooming flower. A couple of licks were given before Byleth paused once again. Edelgard hitched her shoulders at the hot breath in the private sector.

“The mercenaries weren’t wrong… it tastes interesting.”

“BYLETH!”

What is wrong with this woman? Her socialization skills really need some improvements, especially with bedroom talks. Had it been someone else other than Edelgard, they would likely have left Byleth a long time ago! Despite the strange wordings and phrases slipped past the professor’s lips, the teal-haired ignored her girlfriend.

‘ …what do I do next? ‘

Throughout the entire session, it was a lot of work for Byleth. She may have enjoyed it just like Edelgard, but it was her first time too. Memories of the mercenaries work on each other, male or female, threw suggestions into the air. She had to pick and choose what was most appropriate for their current situation. Besides, Byleth didn’t want to sour their first make-out session.

‘ I’ll finish this. ‘

The relentless assaults resumed as she secured her hold on Edelgard’s legs, her fingers digging into the thighs. Byleth indulged once more into tasting the girl’s wet folds. Her tongue ran against the exterior surface in all sorts of direction, a little sloppy in terms of techniques. That matter not to Edelgard. Edelgard right now was battling against the embarrassing noise that proudly proclaimed how pleasant Byleth’s tongue was on her right now. The fireworks were gradually becoming larger and the sparks jolted at an even interval from the sex organ to her core. Her fingers tangled with teal locks as her back arched here and there.

When Byleth buried her tongue into the moist entranceway, Edelgard harshly squeezed her girlfriend’s head.

“A-AH! Haa— Haah! B-Byleth! Oh, Byleth— AH!”

Each thrust that came from the boneless body party went as deep as it physically could. Edelgard repeatedly forced her instructor’s face into the private region. She was intoxicated by pleasure, and she allowed raw instincts to dominant her reasoning. For Byleth, she did her best not to suffocate in Edelgard’s nether region. She responded by pushing against the thighs in order to gain better access. The woman then licked the inside of her walls like a drunken sailor. Edelgard’s bodily fluids were leaking out in preparation for the ultimate climax, the young lady shaking uncontrollably similarly to her moans.

A short-lived scream was heard from the shorter female whenever Byleth’s tongue wiggled and curved either upward or downward. Hearing her girlfriend’s cries turned on the older woman. Though she had never masturbated before, that thought did cross through her mind for a split second. Nonetheless, she shook it off and paid her upmost attention to Edelgard. She expelled her bliss by aggressively tackling the sensitive nub like a suckling.

“H—Haaah! Byleth— I… I can’t— Hah! I can’t hold it— HAH!”

It was driving Edelgard past insanity. Byleth’s tongue and mouth showering love upon her lower region between the legs was all that occupied the student’s mind. Nothing more, nothing less. She breathed rapidly as if she were in a marathon, and the young female arched her back once more. Byleth knew that she was about to be shoved over the edge of the cliff. Who better to do it than the teacher herself? She removed her tongue from the core and focused her entire attention on the clitoris. Enveloping her lips around the small nub, she gave it a few, strong sucking as if she wanted to drain the girl.

“Byleth—! I-I’m— A-AH!”

The fireworks gave a barrage of explosions as the student immediately sat up, curled forward, and trapped Byleth between her legs and partially dressed upper body. Her entire body stiffened as it bore through the explosive sensuality. The professor kept marching forward with the assaults in hopes of dragging her girlfriend’s Cloud Nine experience as long as possible. When Edelgard released her hold and plopped back onto the mattress, Byleth raised her head and felt her body vibrated from the impact. Although she was out of breath from the laborious efforts, that was nothing compared to the white-haired.

Byleth crawled over to the side of Edelgard, faced her, and laid down. As they tried to refuel their lungs with the necessary oxygen, the professor reached out to place a hand on the girl’s chest. It was beating wildly like a horse.

“Are… Are you okay?”

Edelgard wasn’t able to quip in until her breathing slowed down to a reasonable interval. She swallowed and turned her head over to Byleth. She blinked and… smiled.

“I’m more than okay, Byleth.” There was another pause before she added an additional remark. “If anything… I should thank you for teaching me about sex.”

A chuckle emitted from the professor. “Believe it or not, this was my first time.”

“Really? I am honored to be your first. However, you seem experienced enough to have done it with someone else.”

“Back when I was a mercenary, I’ve picked up some of these tips and tricks.”

“…so you’ve watched a couple go at it.”

“It was an accident.”

“Sure, it was. Sure.”

The two then fell into silence, their eyes interlocked with each other. Byleth then leaned in to place a gentle kiss like that of a swan on Edelgard’s lips.

“If you’re up for another lesson, I’m always free for you, El.”

“Since you’ve brought up that offer…” Before the 21-year-old could open her mouth, she found herself straddled by the royal figure. Edelgard began to strip the rest of her upper attire and proclaimed, “I think it’s time I show you what I’ve learned today.”

Meanwhile, Sothis peered from outside of the bedroom's door, her eyebrows raised higher than the ceiling.

"They're STILL at it?! I just woke up from my nap while they had their fun! Guess it's time to sleep again..."

#loyalflutist #one shot #os #fan fiction #fire emblem three houses #f!byleth x edelgard #lEMON LEMON SQUEEZY LEMON PIE #god help purge this sinner soul of mine #(lmao psych it's not gonna happen is it)#edeleth #lemon the lemonade

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sorijilleo-beoreoghae · 5 years

Text

NCT “Meta”

Hey guys! Let me know what you think! Also, feel free to send any related asks, questions, or opinions!

**this includes all subunits!**

Overall Thoughts:

Amazed this concept actually worked out well given SM

The members are ALL incredibly talented

Also all incredibly odd lol

They all get along well and have lots of neat, complex relationships and interactions

Each subunit is so unique and has their own vibe

Let's be honest, we all need more ot21 interaction

Very diverse music

NCT DREAM

(the best subunit lol fight me)

Thoughts:

Super talented group

All really talented

Cohesion and team blending is top tier

Always have super complicated choreo, often end up on the floor

Fresh and not too cutesy, can be rebellious

Consistently good and diverse music

Members GRADUATE as they hit 20 :C

Babies of NCT

Taken care of by other NCT members

Neglected by SM the most (not including U)

Funniest subunit, vlives are gold

Too much chaos in one group

Kings of BOPS

Member Breakdown:

Renjun: Fiesty little baby lol. Voice of an angel, very sweet and strong. Is smol, his humor is rather dark and honestly so relatable. Chinese and Korean bilingual, unable to understand Korean when it suits him lol. Artiste, paints, reads, thinks of philosophical debates. Solid dancer, teaser.

Jeno: No fun lol. Very sincere and kind guy, kind of boring lol and gets teased by members. Great dancer, good rapper, very innocent, kind of like a human puppy. Loves his cats lol. Does ASMR a lot. BFFs with Jaemin.

Haechan: Chaotic devil. Constantly teasing other members and making life difficult, a little diva. Very unique vocal tone, great voice, also very good dancer. Manages to harass everyone despite being in 127 as well as DREAM atm lol.

Jaemin: Actual prince charming. Is literally the kindest soul to exist, super sweet to everyone, fans, members, children, etc. Still manages to joke around and tease them sarcastically a lot. Can play piano, does a lot of volunteer work. Good dancer, great rapper, very distinctive style. Always tries to be cute, especially to fans. BFFs with Renjun and Jeno.

Chenle: CEO lol. Actual dolphin, very clear high voice. Has been singing since he was tiny, BFFs with Jisung. Can rock really weird hair colors, i.e. orange, teal green... Calls Kun "mom" lol knowing it annoys Kun. Little trickster.

Jisung: THE dance prodigy. LOW voice, good rapper and good vocalist, incredible dancer. "Maknae", but really rules DREAM. Great stage presence and total fluff ball off stage. Easily frightened, squishy, literal baby. Doesn't like to do things alone. BFFs with Chenle.

Favorite Song: Drippin'/Boom Most Underrated Song: We Young Song That Grew On Me: My First and Last Favorite MV: Go Favorite Era: We Young Favorite Title track: Boom Favorite Non-title Track: Drippin'/Dream Run/Walk You Home

Album Ranking: 1. We Boom 2. We Go Up 3. We Young 4. The First

Top 10 songs: 1. Drippin’ 2. Boom 3. Dream Run 4. Go 5. We Young 6. Walk You home 7. DNYL 8. We Go Up 9. 1,2,3 10. Fireflies

Bias(es): 1. Jisung 2. Renjun 3. Jaemin

Favorite Dancer: Jisung Favorite Singer: Renjun Favorite Rapper: Jaemin Favorite Choreo: We Young Least Favorite Title Track: Chewing Gum Least Favorite Choreo: none (bruh their choreo is the best) Favorite Rap Part: Jaemin's We go up intro Favorite Vocal Part: Renjun's part in Walk You Home, all of Drippin' Favorite Dance Part: Jaemin's kick in We Go Up, Renjun's center part in We Go Up Popular Song I Don't Like: none Unpopular Opinion: I think DREAM is better without Mark... it's a more complementing fit and blend of member instead of Mark overpowering everything and I love the OT6 balance

Visual Ranking: 1. Jaemin

2. Renjun 3. Jisung 4. Jeno 5. Haechan 6. Chenle

Vocal Ranking: 1. Haechan 2. Renjun 3. Chenle 4. Jisung 5. Jaemin 6. Jeno

Rap Ranking: 1. Jaemin 2. Jeno 3. Jisung 4. Haechan 5. Renjun 6. Chenle

Dance Ranking: 1. Jisung

2. Jeno 3. Jaemin 4. Haechan 5. Renjun 6. Chenle

NCT 127

Thoughts:

Definitely have a very specific sound they like to bring to their music

That does NOT mean that all the songs sound the same

Their ballads are STRONG

A lot of their songs inspire absolute love or hate

Not very even line distribution sometimes, lead vocals get hardly any and Mark/Taeyong get a LOT

Cool choreo

Overworked babies lately

Strange mix of people that somehow manage to thrive lol

Member Breakdown:

Taeyong: Fluffy little ball of sugar and cuddles, like a baby chick. Diligent leader, very responsible, parent of all NCT children LOL. Fantastic rapper, has so much stage presence it's SCARY and dominating. Best on stage, cutie off stage, incredible dancer, works ridiculously hard. Affectionate to members, easily embarrassed.

Taeil: Power main vocal with great range. Dorky, oldest member but often doesn't act like it. Affectionate, especially to Winwin lol. Pretty quiet in general but is kind of out there when he does talk.

Yuta: Real Life anime prince. Red haired Yuta is the superior Yuta (no I do not accept criticism). Super charismatic, great stage presence that varies according to the concept well. Can rap and sing very well, great dancer. Very outspoken and opinionated. Likes to tease the other members and can be ruthless lol.

Johnny: MUSCLES, thick boi, little bit of a thot. Rapper, dancer, vocalist, all around talent. Funny one of the group, naturally entertaining. Likes teasing the other members mercilessly, jokes a lot, sexy king, Chicago boy.

Doyoung: Bunny! Incredibly angelic voice, very distinctive vocal tone, yet he can match his style to any genre of music they produce. Basically a model, super charismatic gaze on stage. Mom of the group, also takes care of DREAMies a lot. Likes to do cover songs, good cook.

Jaehyun: Heartthrob of the group, visual god, great at everything, speaks well, kind, thoughtful, raises eyebrows at the other members antics sometimes but doesn't stop them lol. Knows EXACTLY what he's doing to fans when he's onstage...

WinWin (in this house we will NOT exclude WinWin): Quiet (ish) but savage, does NOT tolerate other members bulls***t, not a fan of touching, but sometimes lets his members hang on him. Traditional Chinese dance, cute without trying, even when specifically not trying. Great at adapting stage persona to genre i.e. Regular v. Touch. If it weren't for WayV we'd never know what his voice sounds like.... *cough* *cough* SM give him lines and DO NOT EXILE HIM I SWEAR TO GOD.

Jungwoo: LITERALLY, and I cannot stress this enough, THE biggest uwu. Kind of oblivious lol, big fluff ball, likes affection, shy and nervous sometimes. Low self esteem, works really hard to improve at all times. Deserves more lines lets be honest.

Mark: SM's supreme rapper, in a constant state of confusion. Silly boy with uncontrollable giggle. Innocent yet not all at the same time. Usually in every possible subunit lol, finally decreasing for once. "oh Canada"

Favorite Song: Simon Says/Highway to Heaven Most Underrated Song: Come Back/ Baby Don't Like It Song That Grew On Me: Firetruck Favorite MV: Simon Says/Touch Favorite Era: Simon Says Favorite Title Track: Simon Says Favorite Non-title Track: Good Ting

Album Break Down: NCT #127 (2016) Limitless (2017) Cherry Bomb (2017) Regular-Irregular (2018) Regulate (2018) We Are Superhuman (2019)

Album Ranking: 1. NCT #127 2. Limitless 3. We Are Superhuman 4. Regulate 5. Regular-Irregular 6. Cherry Bomb

Top 10 Songs: 1. Simon Says 2. Baby Don't Like It 3. Good Thing 4. Highway to Heaven 5. Touch 6. Regular 7. Cherry Bomb 8. No Longer 9. Paradise 10. Firetruck

Bias(es) 1. Doyoung

Favorite Dancer: Taeyong Favorite Singer: Doyoung Favorite Rapper: Taeyong Favorite Choreo: Come Back/Simon Says Least Favorite Title Track: Limitless Least Favorite Choreo: Touch Favorite Rap Part: Taeyong's rap intro in Simon Says Favorite Vocal Part: Cherry Bomb bridge/Doyoung in Baby Don't Like It/Haechan and Doyoung in Highway to Heaven Favorite Dance Part: chorus of Come Back/the pointing bending part of Simon Says Popular Song I Don't Like: Limitless/Wakey-Wakey Unpopular Opinion: Mark and Taeyong are great, but they need to spread the parts out more evenly, especially letting some of the dancers be in the chorus choreo center more

Visual Ranking: 1. Taeyong

2. Doyoung 3. Jaehyun 4. WinWin 5. Johnny 6. Jungwoo 7. Yuta 8. Haechan 9. Mark 10. Taeil

Vocal Ranking: 1. Doyoung 2. Taeil 3. Jaehyun 4. Haechan 5. Jungwoo 6. Yuta 7. Taeyong 8. Mark 9. Johnny 10. WinWin

Rap Ranking: 1. Mark 2. Taeyong 3. Yuta 4. Jaehyun 5. Johnny 6. WinWin 7. Haechan 8. Jungwoo 9. Doyoung 10. Taeil

Dance Ranking: 1. Taeyong

2. Yuta 3. Jaehyun 4. Haechan 5. Johnny 6. WinWin 7. Jungwoo 8. Mark 9. Doyoung 10. Taeil

NCT U

Thoughts:

Most under-utilized subunit

Should be the most used to allow collabs between members of different units, could bring the Chinese and Korean units together a lot too, even doing Chinese promotions

Could help test groups of members for new subunits

Has arguably the BEST songs of any subunit, okay not arguably, definitely

Member Breakdown: not happening since there isn't a recent U comeback :C (not counting the OST)

Favorite Song: Baby Don't Stop Most Underrated Song: The 7th Sense Song That Grew On Me: The 7th Sense Favorite MV: Baby Don't Stop/The 7th Sense Favorite Era: Boss Favorite Title Track: Baby Don't Stop Favorite Choreo: Baby Don't Stop Favorite Rap Part: Taeyong's Boss rap Favorite Vocal Part: Ten's adlibs and "feels so nice/feels so right" in Baby Don't Stop Favorite Dance Part: the iconic (chorus) Baby Don't Stop part

Top Songs: 1. Baby Don't Stop 2. The 7th Sense 3. Boss

Unpopular Opinion: NCT U will reign supreme among subunits if SM ever lets it

WayV

Thoughts:

Solid group

Good cohesion, concept

Good original music as well as new takes on a few existing NCT songs

Choreo for Take Off is legendary

FULL of talent

Should really be integrated with other units more so people stop separating WayV from NCT :C

Member Breakdown:

Kun: Mom of the group, waited for debut forever, easily frustrated with members' antics. The other members intentionally tease him. Promotes the rest of NCT harder than SM lol.

Ten: Dance GOD, talented vocal, good rapper, absolute chaotic MESS of a human being. Little filter, limited self control. Leads the younger members astray. Struggles with Chinese sometimes (but also knows at least 4 languages, so...) and gets help from the other members. Thai legend who is LEGITIMATELY AFRAID OF FRUIT. Wears glasses most of the time, giggles a lot, very suggestive. The other members get tired of his bulls***t XD.

WinWin: Quiet (ish) but savage, does NOT tolerate other members bulls***t, not a fan of touching, but sometimes lets his members hang on him. Traditional Chinese dance, cute without trying, even when specifically not trying. Great at adapting stage persona to genre, if it weren't for WayV we'd never know what his voice sounds like.... *cough* *cough* SM give him lines and DO NOT EXILE HIM I SWEAR TO GOD. IN THIS HOUSE WE STAN A HAPPY, INVOLVED WINWIN.

XiaoJun: Vocalssss. Angry eyebrows lol, but still handsome. A bit reserved compared to some members (at least outwardly LOL), but still young and fun. Dorky dances and causes chaos with YangYang and Hendery. Works hard at dance and all aspects as well.

Lucas: Big dumb puppy lol, very oblivious, jokes a lot, other members tease him a lot for being an idiot XD. Highly entertaining, knows how to make people laugh and put on a show. King of iconic NCT lines (lets not forget "YOU ARE NANA??"). Good dancer, rapper, and vocalist. Visuals too, model proportions.

Hendery: Talks a LOT, looks like Prince Eric from The Little Mermaid and Donkey from Shrek simultaneously. Spontaneous goofball, jokes around with Ten a lot. Was in SM rookies for a while so trained in Korea for good bit.

YangYang: Kind of crazy? Chaotic, uncontrollable. Baby (should've been added to DREAM too, don't @ me), good rapper but also solid vocalist and really tries in everything. Speaks German, which is cool.

Favorite Song: Dream Launch Most Underrated Song: Dream Launch Song That Grew On Me: Say It Favorite MV: Let Me Love You Favorite Title Track: Take Off Favorite Non-title Track: Dream Launch

Songs Ranking: 1. Dream Launch 2. Take Off 3. Let Me Love You 4. Come Back 5. Regular 6. Say It

Bias(es): 1. Ten

Favorite Dancer: Ten Favorite Vocal: XiaoJun Favorite Rapper: Lucas Favorite Choreo: Take Off Unpopular Opinion: WayV is good as it is, I don't think DREAM China line (Renjun and Chenle) should join when they graduate DREAM. They don't really fit the image for the group and I'd much rather see an OT5 or OT6 DREAM fixed unit than adding members to already established units.

Visual Ranking: 1. Lucas

2. Ten 3. XiaoJun 4. WinWin 5. Hendery 6. YangYang 7. Kun

Vocal Ranking: 1. XiaoJun 2. Ten 3. Kun 4. Lucas 5. YangYang 6. Hendery 7. WinWin

Rap Ranking: 1. Lucas 2. YangYang 3. Ten 4. Hendery 5. WinWin 6. XiaoJun 7. Kun

Dance Ranking: 1. Ten

2. WinWin 3. Lucas 4. Hendery 5. YangYang 6. XiaoJun 7. Kun

Let me know what you thought! Also, if you have any suggestions for future metas please send them to me!

Previously done:

ASTRO

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