#also looks like jeremy irons

[polkadotjohnson]

Pit Boss Warrick - Twin Peaks the Return (2017)

[houseofborgia]

"There are moments where [Juan] manipulates other people in a similar the way they’ve been manipulating him. The scene between Jeremy and myself with the dagger is a last ditch frantic attempt at trying to win [Rodrigo] over." Do you think Juan was genuine in the knife scene? Do you think he would have killed himself? "Yeah I think so. He always does what is true inside him...It wasn’t simply about the eventual confrontation, but all about the richness of this twisted family make-up."

[seventh-fantasy]

He was very responsive to my ancient Oriental ways of love. All of which I invented myself, just for him.

M. BUTTERFLY (1993) dir. David Cronenberg

[estellaestella]

Timothee Chalamet, Jodie Comer, Alex Lawther in a poster for BRIDESHEAD REVISITED.

Luca Guadagnino was in talks to do a remake of this novel with Andrew Garfield before it fell through. It wd hv been cool to see Luca do justice to Charles' relationships with the Flyte siblings.

[navree]

once again, dealing with the deep internal struggle of loving the human drama and also having a deep affection for the human characters and wanting them to succeed and be happy and getting all up in my 8am emotions whenever they do anything, vs rather unfortunately still loving whenever dracula swans around and bastards it up

[wheelsgoroundincircles]

1930 Ford Highboy Coupe

There’s always lots of detail work with any build and this ’30 Ford highboy coupe is no exception. Look closely and you will find Craftworks Fabrication handmade steel motor mounts. The license plate and valve covers were painted by Jeremy Seanor of Luckystrike Designs. He also painted all the accompanying engine and tranny parts. The powdercoat was handled by Pittsburgh Powder Coat while the chrome plating was conducted by Jon Wright’s Custom Chrome Plating.

The chassis is comprised of a Roadster Shop custom frame that was stepped, stretched, and features contoured ’32 Ford-style framerails. It was also then boxed, capped, and has hole punch flared front framehorns. From here the frame is outfitted with a Super Bell 4-inch drop, drilled and plated I-beam axle, low-profile monoleaf spring with Ridetech tubular shocks paired to custom-made drilled billet radius rods from Johnson’s Hot Rod Shop. Steering falls to the Flaming River box and a LimeWorks Hot Rod column topped with a four-spoke Billet Specialties Sprint Car–style leather-wrapped wheel. In back there’s a Currie 9-inch rearend outfitted with 3.70 gears, 31-spline axles, QA1 coilovers, a Pete & Jakes Panhard bar, and a parallel four-link setup. Braking is a combination of disc/drum front to rear. The forward braking dark gray–painted Wilwood Dynalite calipers are neatly hidden behind the Pete & Jakes finned backing plates. While in back the 9-inch is outfitted with 11-inch brakes, this time hidden beneath the SO-CAL Speed Shop finned drums all the while the chassis rides on a full set of 16-inch Dayton wire wheels wrapped with Coker/Excelsior rubber measuring 5.50R16 in front and 7.00R18 in the back.

All hot rods have something fun settled between the ’rails and beneath the hood (well if they have a hood). In the case of our ’30 Ford highboy coupe it sure appears to be a vintage Ford Y-block but after more than a cursory look we begin to see the telltale signs that there’s something more. Indeed, while it may look like a Ford it truly is a 376-inch LSX iron block, with aluminum heads and ARP studs, plus adapter-equipped small-block Ford (Windsor) valve covers all from Don Hardy Race Cars and then assembled by Talik and Marc Mullin. The intake is an Edelbrock LS dual quad with a pair of Thunder AVS EnduraShine carbs dressed in OTB air cleaners. Delivering the gas from the Tanks stainless reservoir is an Earl’s Performance billet fuel pump. More engine accessories include an MSD 6AL box to go along with the MSD billet Ford small-block distributor that functions through a timing cover adapter from Chevrolet Performance all the while using an MSD coil and Lokar vintage plug wires. Powermaster also supplied the alternator and starter, the battery is an XS Power AGM, and a Wegner Motorsports water pump is used as well as a Wegner front accessory drive unit. This 500-plus hp V-8 utilizes custom headers made at Craftworks Fabrication based on Ultimate Headers LS header flanges. The pseudo-Ford small-block is backed up to a TCI StreetFighter 700-R4 with a 2,800-stall speed converter operated by a Lokar shifter. The trans cooler comes by way of Derale Performance and moves the power through a 3-inch-diameter custom-made driveshaft.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

The surprising truth about data-driven dictatorships

Here’s the “dictator’s dilemma”: they want to block their country’s frustrated elites from mobilizing against them, so they censor public communications; but they also want to know what their people truly believe, so they can head off simmering resentments before they boil over into regime-toppling revolutions.

These two strategies are in tension: the more you censor, the less you know about the true feelings of your citizens and the easier it will be to miss serious problems until they spill over into the streets (think: the fall of the Berlin Wall or Tunisia before the Arab Spring). Dictators try to square this circle with things like private opinion polling or petition systems, but these capture a small slice of the potentially destabiziling moods circulating in the body politic.

Enter AI: back in 2018, Yuval Harari proposed that AI would supercharge dictatorships by mining and summarizing the public mood — as captured on social media — allowing dictators to tack into serious discontent and diffuse it before it erupted into unequenchable wildfire:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2018/10/yuval-noah-harari-technology-tyranny/568330/

Harari wrote that “the desire to concentrate all information and power in one place may become [dictators] decisive advantage in the 21st century.” But other political scientists sharply disagreed. Last year, Henry Farrell, Jeremy Wallace and Abraham Newman published a thoroughgoing rebuttal to Harari in Foreign Affairs:

https://www.foreignaffairs.com/world/spirals-delusion-artificial-intelligence-decision-making

They argued that — like everyone who gets excited about AI, only to have their hopes dashed — dictators seeking to use AI to understand the public mood would run into serious training data bias problems. After all, people living under dictatorships know that spouting off about their discontent and desire for change is a risky business, so they will self-censor on social media. That’s true even if a person isn’t afraid of retaliation: if you know that using certain words or phrases in a post will get it autoblocked by a censorbot, what’s the point of trying to use those words?

The phrase “Garbage In, Garbage Out” dates back to 1957. That’s how long we’ve known that a computer that operates on bad data will barf up bad conclusions. But this is a very inconvenient truth for AI weirdos: having given up on manually assembling training data based on careful human judgment with multiple review steps, the AI industry “pivoted” to mass ingestion of scraped data from the whole internet.

But adding more unreliable data to an unreliable dataset doesn’t improve its reliability. GIGO is the iron law of computing, and you can’t repeal it by shoveling more garbage into the top of the training funnel:

https://memex.craphound.com/2018/05/29/garbage-in-garbage-out-machine-learning-has-not-repealed-the-iron-law-of-computer-science/

When it comes to “AI” that’s used for decision support — that is, when an algorithm tells humans what to do and they do it — then you get something worse than Garbage In, Garbage Out — you get Garbage In, Garbage Out, Garbage Back In Again. That’s when the AI spits out something wrong, and then another AI sucks up that wrong conclusion and uses it to generate more conclusions.

To see this in action, consider the deeply flawed predictive policing systems that cities around the world rely on. These systems suck up crime data from the cops, then predict where crime is going to be, and send cops to those “hotspots” to do things like throw Black kids up against a wall and make them turn out their pockets, or pull over drivers and search their cars after pretending to have smelled cannabis.

The problem here is that “crime the police detected” isn’t the same as “crime.” You only find crime where you look for it. For example, there are far more incidents of domestic abuse reported in apartment buildings than in fully detached homes. That’s not because apartment dwellers are more likely to be wife-beaters: it’s because domestic abuse is most often reported by a neighbor who hears it through the walls.

So if your cops practice racially biased policing (I know, this is hard to imagine, but stay with me /s), then the crime they detect will already be a function of bias. If you only ever throw Black kids up against a wall and turn out their pockets, then every knife and dime-bag you find in someone’s pockets will come from some Black kid the cops decided to harass.

That’s life without AI. But now let’s throw in predictive policing: feed your “knives found in pockets” data to an algorithm and ask it to predict where there are more knives in pockets, and it will send you back to that Black neighborhood and tell you do throw even more Black kids up against a wall and search their pockets. The more you do this, the more knives you’ll find, and the more you’ll go back and do it again.

This is what Patrick Ball from the Human Rights Data Analysis Group calls “empiricism washing”: take a biased procedure and feed it to an algorithm, and then you get to go and do more biased procedures, and whenever anyone accuses you of bias, you can insist that you’re just following an empirical conclusion of a neutral algorithm, because “math can’t be racist.”

HRDAG has done excellent work on this, finding a natural experiment that makes the problem of GIGOGBI crystal clear. The National Survey On Drug Use and Health produces the gold standard snapshot of drug use in America. Kristian Lum and William Isaac took Oakland’s drug arrest data from 2010 and asked Predpol, a leading predictive policing product, to predict where Oakland’s 2011 drug use would take place.

[Image ID: (a) Number of drug arrests made by Oakland police department, 2010. (1) West Oakland, (2) International Boulevard. (b) Estimated number of drug users, based on 2011 National Survey on Drug Use and Health]

Then, they compared those predictions to the outcomes of the 2011 survey, which shows where actual drug use took place. The two maps couldn’t be more different:

https://rss.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/j.1740-9713.2016.00960.x

Predpol told cops to go and look for drug use in a predominantly Black, working class neighborhood. Meanwhile the NSDUH survey showed the actual drug use took place all over Oakland, with a higher concentration in the Berkeley-neighboring student neighborhood.

What’s even more vivid is what happens when you simulate running Predpol on the new arrest data that would be generated by cops following its recommendations. If the cops went to that Black neighborhood and found more drugs there and told Predpol about it, the recommendation gets stronger and more confident.

In other words, GIGOGBI is a system for concentrating bias. Even trace amounts of bias in the original training data get refined and magnified when they are output though a decision support system that directs humans to go an act on that output. Algorithms are to bias what centrifuges are to radioactive ore: a way to turn minute amounts of bias into pluripotent, indestructible toxic waste.

There’s a great name for an AI that’s trained on an AI’s output, courtesy of Jathan Sadowski: “Habsburg AI.”

And that brings me back to the Dictator’s Dilemma. If your citizens are self-censoring in order to avoid retaliation or algorithmic shadowbanning, then the AI you train on their posts in order to find out what they’re really thinking will steer you in the opposite direction, so you make bad policies that make people angrier and destabilize things more.

Or at least, that was Farrell(et al)’s theory. And for many years, that’s where the debate over AI and dictatorship has stalled: theory vs theory. But now, there’s some empirical data on this, thanks to the “The Digital Dictator’s Dilemma,” a new paper from UCSD PhD candidate Eddie Yang:

https://www.eddieyang.net/research/DDD.pdf

Yang figured out a way to test these dueling hypotheses. He got 10 million Chinese social media posts from the start of the pandemic, before companies like Weibo were required to censor certain pandemic-related posts as politically sensitive. Yang treats these posts as a robust snapshot of public opinion: because there was no censorship of pandemic-related chatter, Chinese users were free to post anything they wanted without having to self-censor for fear of retaliation or deletion.

Next, Yang acquired the censorship model used by a real Chinese social media company to decide which posts should be blocked. Using this, he was able to determine which of the posts in the original set would be censored today in China.

That means that Yang knows that the “real” sentiment in the Chinese social media snapshot is, and what Chinese authorities would believe it to be if Chinese users were self-censoring all the posts that would be flagged by censorware today.

From here, Yang was able to play with the knobs, and determine how “preference-falsification” (when users lie about their feelings) and self-censorship would give a dictatorship a misleading view of public sentiment. What he finds is that the more repressive a regime is — the more people are incentivized to falsify or censor their views — the worse the system gets at uncovering the true public mood.

What’s more, adding additional (bad) data to the system doesn’t fix this “missing data” problem. GIGO remains an iron law of computing in this context, too.

But it gets better (or worse, I guess): Yang models a “crisis” scenario in which users stop self-censoring and start articulating their true views (because they’ve run out of fucks to give). This is the most dangerous moment for a dictator, and depending on the dictatorship handles it, they either get another decade or rule, or they wake up with guillotines on their lawns.

But “crisis” is where AI performs the worst. Trained on the “status quo” data where users are continuously self-censoring and preference-falsifying, AI has no clue how to handle the unvarnished truth. Both its recommendations about what to censor and its summaries of public sentiment are the least accurate when crisis erupts.

But here’s an interesting wrinkle: Yang scraped a bunch of Chinese users’ posts from Twitter — which the Chinese government doesn’t get to censor (yet) or spy on (yet) — and fed them to the model. He hypothesized that when Chinese users post to American social media, they don’t self-censor or preference-falsify, so this data should help the model improve its accuracy.

He was right — the model got significantly better once it ingested data from Twitter than when it was working solely from Weibo posts. And Yang notes that dictatorships all over the world are widely understood to be scraping western/northern social media.

But even though Twitter data improved the model’s accuracy, it was still wildly inaccurate, compared to the same model trained on a full set of un-self-censored, un-falsified data. GIGO is not an option, it’s the law (of computing).

Writing about the study on Crooked Timber, Farrell notes that as the world fills up with “garbage and noise” (he invokes Philip K Dick’s delighted coinage “gubbish”), “approximately correct knowledge becomes the scarce and valuable resource.”

https://crookedtimber.org/2023/07/25/51610/

This “probably approximately correct knowledge” comes from humans, not LLMs or AI, and so “the social applications of machine learning in non-authoritarian societies are just as parasitic on these forms of human knowledge production as authoritarian governments.”

The Clarion Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers’ Workshop summer fundraiser is almost over! I am an alum, instructor and volunteer board member for this nonprofit workshop whose alums include Octavia Butler, Kim Stanley Robinson, Bruce Sterling, Nalo Hopkinson, Kameron Hurley, Nnedi Okorafor, Lucius Shepard, and Ted Chiang! Your donations will help us subsidize tuition for students, making Clarion — and sf/f — more accessible for all kinds of writers.

Libro.fm is the indie-bookstore-friendly, DRM-free audiobook alternative to Audible, the Amazon-owned monopolist that locks every book you buy to Amazon forever. When you buy a book on Libro, they share some of the purchase price with a local indie bookstore of your choosing (Libro is the best partner I have in selling my own DRM-free audiobooks!). As of today, Libro is even better, because it’s available in five new territories and currencies: Canada, the UK, the EU, Australia and New Zealand!

[Image ID: An altered image of the Nuremberg rally, with ranked lines of soldiers facing a towering figure in a many-ribboned soldier's coat. He wears a high-peaked cap with a microchip in place of insignia. His head has been replaced with the menacing red eye of HAL9000 from Stanley Kubrick's '2001: A Space Odyssey.' The sky behind him is filled with a 'code waterfall' from 'The Matrix.']

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

 — 

Raimond Spekking (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Acer_Extensa_5220_-_Columbia_MB_06236-1N_-_Intel_Celeron_M_530_-_SLA2G_-_in_Socket_479-5029.jpg

CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/deed.en

 — 

Russian Airborne Troops (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Vladislav_Achalov_at_the_Airborne_Troops_Day_in_Moscow_%E2%80%93_August_2,_2008.jpg

“Soldiers of Russia” Cultural Center (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Col._Leonid_Khabarov_in_an_everyday_service_uniform.JPG

CC BY-SA 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en

[genericpuff]

Ive read a few of your LO esaays (all of which are really well written!) But I was wondering something.

Many people talk about how Rachel loves the story Lolita, and has talked about it before, but nobody has ever shown screenshots. I was wondering if you had any or knew where to find any. This is just being curious, not doubting your statements

Ah so I actually responded to a comment just like this a while back on reddit with all the receipts (it was particularly someone who was claiming it was all "made up" because like you, they couldn't seem to get any proof of it, which is totally valid) so I just had to go and dig those back up haha

DISCLAIMER: I want to make it clear that a lot of people tend to run amok with these suspicious pieces of evidence towards Rachel either "thinking Lolita was a romance" or being a pedophile. I want to make it clear that I do not think any of this is proof towards either of these claims. I do not think that she blatantly thinks Lolita is a romance, or that she was trying to perpetuate pedophilia in any sort of way, just that she may have wanted to have her cake and eat it too by acknowledging the age gap but embracing it anyways as she does throughout LO. I think, at best, she's a terrible writer who's still using the things she liked when she was a teenager / young adult as inspiration without actually going back and re-analyzing those things with an updated 38-year-old viewpoint (as she does this with a lot of things, not just Lolita). Claiming that the following receipts is 'proof' of Rachel being some kind of sex pest / pedophile is at best not constructive at all for the real discussions to be had concerning LO's subtext, and at worst, a serious claim that can ruin someone's life if thrown around without cause. Let's please be responsible and level-headed in how we approach this topic.

Old MySpace + DeviantArt bios with her interests listed:

Her old art site where she labels herself as a "lolita vamp" artist:

Her intro post from a lolita-themed forum she ran:

She does express that it's not THAT kind of lolita, which I'd like to think she never intended in the first place, but it's really telling that LO still manages to be that kind of lolita in a lot of ways, to the point that there are many scenes in LO that feel a little too similar to scenes from the 1990's Jeremy Irons adaptation, such as seen here.

(the above image are song lyrics written about the book, Lolita)

Also despite Rachel saying it wasn't "that kind" of lolita, she still made it clear back in the 2017/2018 run of the comic on Tumblr that Hades is, indeed, a "grown ass man", and that Persephone is a teenager.

And of course the proof is in the pudding, the comic itself is well aware of Persephone's age:

(either Rachel has been using Apollo as a mouthpiece for criticism for years, or she seriously thought this was supposed to make Hades look like the better partner for Persephone because "look at how mean Apollo is" when... he's deadass spitting facts LOL)

As I mentioned in my disclaimer, I don't think Rachel herself is in any way a sex pest or a pedo or whatever you might jump to assuming. Rachel has a history of being inspired by things she watched when she was a child without ever actually going back to re-analyze it or ask herself if what she read was credible or real-

(this isn't the only proof there is of her behaving this way, there's also the fact that she was clearly a huge Disney fan as a child but never asked herself why those movies worked as a piece of written media).

So again, I think at best she's just sort of dated herself by not going to the effort of researching the things she was into when she was a child, she tends to just throw things in that she likes haphazardly without a single thought as to why they worked in the first place or whether or not they would work in LO. Though this is a bit of a saltier opinion, I think when it comes to the Lolita thing specifically, I have a feeling she never actually read the book, just sorta did that thing where she watched the movie adaptation from the 90's and assumed that counted as reading the book and so she put it down as her favorite book / Nabokov as her favorite writer.

But none of that speculation really makes much difference because the evidence is 20+ years old. What does matter is that despite her tastes being what they were 20+ years ago, they're still present in LO and it's not even subtle, there are so many times Rachel has outright said both within the comic and outside of it that Hades is a "grown ass man" and Persephone is a literal teenager. Her fans, of course, will still go to the effort of explaining it on her behalf ("they're gods! ageing isn't a thing for them!" "how old you are doesn't matter when you can be immortal!" "well she probably doesn't mean LITERALLY 19, just like, the god version of it..."), but you can't deny what's coming from the horse's mouth - Hades and Persephone are in a relationship based on an intentionally massive age gap. Regardless of what completely speculative parallels we can draw between H x P and that of Lolita's Humbert Humbert and Dolores using 20 year old MySpace bios as evidence, Hades and Persephone having a massive and intentional age gap is undeniable fact made canon by the creator herself, no matter how you try and slice it.

[enteringdullsville]

But what is if Island was made today?

The A. Plot Trio redesigned. Personalities largely the same, although (Le)Sha(u)na trades some of her trademark slang to make room for an even more snarky attitude.

Emphasis on “some”. Her calling Harry a tadpole will never not be funny.

Heather’s a little less impulsive here. Where the canon one would read Gwen’s dialogue to the world, this one would hide it and use it as blackmail. Harold’s about the same, but even more of a theatre kid.

I like to think that the writing on his shirt will change every episode.

Justin starts off as his Action self: not a complete jerk, but still very vain and petty. Katie and Sadie, however, get a complete overhaul, going the “odd friendship” route by playing up Katie’s energetic tendencies and Sadie’s relative intelligence.

Now I kinda regret ditching the hat. Eh. Anyway, they’re about the same.

Owen, Tyler, and DJ are mostly unchanged. Cody plays up his geeky traits and whatever flirting skills he had in canon are completely gone here, since Gwen doesn’t even realize he likes her throughout the season.

Also step aside, Beth. Cody’s the new shortest guy in the camp.

Speaking of which, Beth’s artistic talents are a more active part of her characterization, hence the stickers and paint splatters. Ezekiel’s more of a basket case. Turns out his canon counterpart hates going outside. Of course I started to run with it and I made him a typical “quiet kid”. He’s slightly more socially aware, but he’s probably still going home first (not that he’s complaining).

Lindsay’s the same, but lookit her cool jacket!

Courtney’s bossiness is gone almost entirely; she’s a pure teacher’s (read: host’s) pet. The only one she’s trying to push around is a canon compliant Duncan.

Noah’s part of Heather’s alliance as her spy, just as the rumors say. Eva’s more social, generally more boisterous, but no less temperamental. I may have ripped off TD Reunion’s look for her.

Izzy is a universal constant. She changes for nobody.

I could’ve added Sierra and Alejandro. But I didn’t, because where’s the fun in that?

BTW, these are very rough designs. TD’s art style, despite being the inspiration for my own, is deceptively hard to emulate.

Jeremy (Killer Bass) is a mischievous prankster who the rest of his team quickly deems an annoyance but keeps around for his unorthodox thinking. He almost immediately forms a kinship with Harold and Tyler as the team’s outcasts, meaning Courtney and Bridgette have to deal with two warring trios as whoever hasn’t been eliminated by this point watches in amusement.

Addison (Not Killer Bass) is a fast talking hustler who’s smuggled a ton of sweets into camp and barters them off to the other Gophers, mostly Owen, Izzy, and Cody, in exchange for assistance. She’s a member of Heather’s alliance, bringing their numbers up to five, but she’s clearly a wildcard who’ll flip on her if it’s convenient. Heather can’t trust so easily, but Addison’s ironically one of the few who doesn’t hate her.

I have a whole elimination order planned out, but I don’t have the time to write a full fanfic, so I’ll just keep it shelved for now. Maybe I’ll just make a broad outline.

[lastchancestardomm]

TF2 Mercs Headcanons

That's it. That's the post. A long-ass post about my headcanons for the Mercs + Miss Pauling. Just a brain splurge, if anything, so cringe warning.

Also, FYI, Miss Pauling's segment might be shorter than the rest. I admit I don't have as many ideas for her.

——————————————————————————

Scout

~ His full name is Jeremy Elbertson-René.

~ He is 23 and 5'10.

~ He was born in Boston, Massachusetts. He grew up in the Quincy area, mainly surrounded by his seven older brothers and ma.

~ As a child, he was in little league baseball.

~ Most definitely has ADHD.

~ Pansexual (Bisexual this, gay that; where's the frying pan in this equation?? Not only is it a reference to a joke, but also ironic).

~ Most of his older brothers became unkempt once they graduated, and some of the younger ones started to smoke; to push boundaries, or something. On the Quincy street corners, they could be spotted huddled together like estranged raccoons.

~ He has a rocky relationship with his oldest brother. The two rarely saw each other. Despite all the teasing and bullying he faced for being a runt, he loves his brothers. But him and his oldest haven't talked in a long while.

~ His ma loves him like no other. The Youngest Child Syndrome is very strong with him. Nowadays, he still gets letters all the way from Boston with cheesy nicknames and hearts drawn all over them from his ma, which he loves despite how much it embarrasses him.

~ Ticklish.

~ Hopped up on caffeine, he somehow biked all the way from Quincy, Boston, to New Mexico before unceremoniously collapsing on the side of the street to take a three-day nap, just to take the job of a Mercenary. He hates mentioning this, for some reason. Is it the "collapsing on the side of the street" part?

~ He can read at about a 2nd-Grade level. Any sentence more complex than "The cat chases the bird" will look like a foreign language to him.

~ He only took the job because bashing heads in in exchange for cash sounded incredibly amusing and fun to him. Other than getting into street fights as a kid, he has no real qualifications.

~ He stims quite a lot. He wrings his hands, bounces his leg, if he has access to gum he tends to chew the whole pack at once for the texture; and as he usually has a spare baseball on hand, he'll toss into the air and catch it or bounce it against a wall.

Soldier

~ His full name is Johnathan Harold Doe. After an incident, and thanks to outside hands, he now goes under the alias Jane Doe.

~ He is 44 and 5'11.

~ He was born in South Dakota.

~ Even as a child, he was extremely patriotic for America, despite his classmates jeers. He became very familiar with the dean's office.

~ He was raised in an extremely conservative household, and was taught to tote guns at a young age.

~ Had a terrible father.

~ For his teenage years and young adulthood, he spent most of his time in military camps and other youth academies, where he has seen and done some things he'd rather forget.

~ At the height of World War 2, he had attempted to join the army, but was rejected by every branch of the U.S Military. In a burning state of defiance, he bought himself a ticket to Poland and started blasting villages his gut told him were Nazi-owned, only returning in 1949. He is now a war-criminal in all of Europe.

~ He paces often; when and when he's not talking, when he's bored, or simply to stim. At first, it was somewhat stress-inducing for the rest of the Mercs; waking up to see him marching up and down the hallway and such at night.

~ The only way he can sleep at the base is if there's a fan on. If there is not a fan on, he will lay stock-still but never sleep.

~ Has an incredible sweet tooth. The only other way to convince this stubborn man to do anything other than to exclaim it's for America, is to lure him in with candy or pastries.

~ He created his own rocket launcher. He's a tad nutty, but he can be damn smart when need be.

~ He can read, though whatever note it is must be drenched with military jargon. The same goes for his writing; broken grammar and inappropriate use of military slang.

Pyro

~ He shed his full name and goes by only Pyro.

~ He is 32 and 5'9.

~ He was born in Italy. (I got this idea from the fact Italy is in the Ring Of Fire.)

~ Pyrovision is just for shits 'n giggles. It turns his favourite activity, burning people alive, into something ridiculous and silly that makes it all the more fun and enjoyable. He is sociopathic, but hides it surprisingly well under the guise of absurdity.

~ Autistic.

~ Intersex.

~ He was raised by his Nan after both of his parents died in a fire-related incident, caused by him. He accidentally set the drapes on fire, and then sat starry-eyed as he watched the flames spread. Before he knew it, he was on the curb, watching the smoldering ruins of his home crumble to the ground.

~ Despite much of his youth being bent over a chair and getting whacked with a wooden spoon, he loves his Nan like no other, and can be spotted calling her throughout the day.

~ Similarly to Scout, this full-grown child stims often; rocking back-and-forth, bumping his knees, fiddling with his own or another Mercs fingers, flicking a lighter on and off, ect ect. He especially has a certain hatred for textures; while he loves textured rubber to naw on or bend, things such as velvet fabric or Engineer's oil rags freak him out.

~ Even more ticklish than Scout.

~ A sweets-lover through and through, but he especially loves Italian pastries. They have an aftertaste of nostalgia and actually accidentally burning them when trying to bake them with his Nan that is irresistible.

~ The wiggliest sleeper ever. It's not that he's violent, it's that he goes to bed normally and ends up on the floor turned into a human pretzel when he wakes up.

~ He can't read, preferring another Merc to read to him.

~ As a man-child to the core, immature pranks are something to look out for if you stalk around the base at night.

~ His favourite movie is The Wizard of Oz (1939).

Demoman

~ His full name is Tavish Finnegan DeGroot.

~ He's is 44 and 6'1.

~ He was born in Ullapool, Scotland.

~ He rarely saw his father when he was young. His father is practically a fable to him.

~ Monoculus and him have a co-worker relationship. It's a wonder how he manages with the voice of his haunted eye narrating his life.

~ Where most children would want to become pilots or policemen, Tav wanted to kill the Loch Ness Monster. During his time as a Mercenary, he actually managed to. It's still one of his greatest achievements, he believes.

~ Him and Miss Pauling have a pretty close relationship, bonding over going to wine tastings.

~ He started to drink to cope with the death of his father, and impending doom of getting a job. During this time too, he also started to busk (perform music on the street in exchange for money), where he'd play the bagpipe.

~ Tav had two sets of adoptive parents. His first adoptive parents sent him away, as they were terrified of his nack for bomb-making. His second set were accidentally blown up while he was trying to craft Loch Ness Monster-killing explosives. He's kind of ashamed about what happened to his second set.

~ He has long, dark hair that is indeed greasy, but nonetheless he has developed a habit of twirling it or running his fingers through it.

~ In 1968, when he first met the others, he was the judgiest of all of them. He was almost hostile towards them, but he came around in the end.

~ He can read and write perfectly well, though his handwriting does tend to go all over the page, even with lines.

Heavy

~ His full name is Mikhail "Misha" Orlok.

~ He is 43 and 6'7.

~ He was born in Moscow, Russia. Though, his current residence is in the Dzhugdzhur Mountains in Siberia.

~ His father was a prominent Counter-revolutionary, and a loud voice against the Soviet rule. So, in 1941, he was shot dead during a Soviet raid. Following the traumatic event, his family was traced and imprisoned in a north Siberian gulag.

~ His family was trapped there for three months, when a fire had been started by other prisoners. In the chaos, Misha led his family to safety, despite the yelling and gunfire surrounding him.

~ It took two months for his TF Industries "For Hire" letter to reach him by sled dog, and he only agreed if he was allowed to send the paycheck to his family.

~ When he had met the others for the first time, while Demoman was the judgiest; he was the most secretive. In fact, even now, most don't know his full backstory.

~ Other than Engineer, those Mercenaries who seek someone to confide to will come to Misha. He is the group's best secret-keeper, after all.

~ He has a PhD in Russian Literature, and is the second-best Mercenary at math-related subjects.

~ His favorite film is The Dirty Dozen and first 20 minutes of Rocky IV. Other than that, he doesn't watch movies. He generally prefers books.

~ He can read and write Russian perfectly, maybe a bit too grandiose, but he can do it quite well. English is where he struggles, and English documents are nearly indecipherable.

Engineer

~ His full name is Dell Conagher.

~ He is 48 and 5'6.

~ He was born in Bee Cave, Texas.

~ Most of his childhood was spent working under the hot, Texan sun on his father's oil fields. Sometimes, he would manage to con his friends into helping him with the hard labor.

~ He was a troublemaker as a child and frighteningly creative, but he thankfully mellowed out as he got older. Dell has seen and done some crazy, mad, and downright absurd things in his youth.

~ He has Ophidiophobia; a fear of snakes.

~ Dell's father is the TFC Engineer, Fred.

~ He has 11 PhDs, and cut off his right hand to use the Gunslinger.

~ His mother and father loved him as a kid, despite his father being gone often for work and such. On the weekends, though, he'd get a heartfelt letter from his dad.

~ While he himself doesn't consider it a stim, Dell has a tendency to rearrange things to occupy himself. Ranging from simply moving something to another shelf, to completely flipping his workshop upside-down.

~ When he was twelve years old, him and his friends were dicking around at an old ranch. His comeuppance for the tomfoolery? Getting kicked by a horse, right in the jaw. He's a proud Texan, and will gladly jump onto a horse rodeo-style, he will look just a tad uneasy.

~ While another Mercenary is the designated "Mother-figure" to the rest, Engi is the designated "Father-figure" to them.

~ A teacher's pet. He was "A pleasure to have in class", despite attempting to teach the much younger kids, whom couldn't understand, calculus and possibly mouthing-off a teacher once or twice.

Medic

~ His full name is Ludwig Humböldt.

~ He is 45 and 6'0.

~ He was born in Rottenburg, Germany.

~ He is Jewish.

~ Autistic (Fighting the Eric Cartman "Three strikes, Kyle!" quote rn).

~ He came from a long line of both doctors and chemists, and the bulk of his medical knowledge came from reading his father's books.

~ While his mother and father loved him, though possibly weighing him down with high expectations, his classmates were the worst.

~ He was a crybaby and easy to annoy, which made him the target of many of his classmates pranks and jeers. It didn't help he had both glasses and braces, and was somewhat baby-faced in highschool.

~ From pails of water being dumped on his head, to having his things tarnished; he hated school in his youth. Still, he managed to scrape by, and successfully earned his medical license.

~ He ran a pharmacy for a while in Stuttgart, at least until Nazi soldiers had raided the establishment and taken him to unwillingly join the Nazi armadda.

~ During his time as a Nazi field medic, his sanity decreased substantially. At the end of the war, he retreated to Stuttgart. Between the end of the war and losing his medical license due to stealing a man's skeleton, he came in possession of some Prime Minister's wedding doves; giving him Archimedes and the rest of his dovery. He was going to preform experiments on them, but the birds somehow won his heart.

~ We all are familiar with Archimedes, his beloved second-in-command, but he has ten total doves. Euclid, the food-stealer; Eratosthenes, a talkative, perky one; Hippocrates, a charmingly dopey thing; Aristotle, flouncing about and prone to bullying the other doves; Thales, a kleptomaniac; Eudoxes, blind and as Archimedes is to Medic, Eudoxes is to Demoman; Galen, mischievous and a trouble-maker; Socrates, likely the eldest and loves cozying up in one's shirt; and Xenophanes, who is noisy, demanding, and prone to scratching and biting.

~ He's the designated "Mother-figure" to the Mercenaries; who'll heal their injuries and not mock them for whatever crazy or embarrassing way they got said injury. God, they drive him up the wall sometimes, but something's holding him back from snapping (most likely the fondness he has for the others, especially Heavy, but don't tell him that).

Sniper

~ His full name is Michael "Mick"/"Mickey" Mundy. But his name also is Mun-Dee.

~ He is 27 and 6'1.

~ He was born in Dunedin, New Zealand– which is underwater, of course.

~ He spent his childhood in Adelaide, Australia; where he was picked on by other kids.

~ Plenty of jeers were thrown his way, by both adults and children, as he grew up. Everything from "beanpole" to his very own nickname of "Mick-Stick" he had memorized.

~ Most of his youth he spent high in trees, away from his bullies and teachers and other adults who would no doubt spit in his face and step on his achievements. As he got older, with pinpoint precision, he made rocks and sticks rain from the sky and onto his tormenters as their comeuppance.

~ His adoptive parents loved him, of course; and he loved them back, but they did not care for his blossoming profession. His father did actually teach him how to hunt, though, which probably didn't help.

~ As a teen, he took up a small gig as an animal exterminator. As a novice exterminator, he had faced giga-sized crocodiles and kangaroos twice his height. He'd stab mothballs onto the points of his arrows, and launch them into parks overrun by spiders and their webs. He'd pull gluttonous, bitey fish out of lakes with his bare hands. It was definitely much more fun than his current "extermination" gig.

~ He has a peculiar ability to crash like a wreck anywhere; simply getting too comfy leaning against a wall could cause him to start snoozing. On the other hand, any small noise will startle him awake, and prevent him from falling back to sleep for the next few hours.

~ The amber-tinted sunglasses he's iconic for actually are his dad's, which he keeps and continues to wear for sentimental reasons.

~ Every few years, the zit-faced mail boy brings him an algae-covered glass bottle with a wet letter inside, always starting with "My dearest son...". He always throws out the letters, because he knows what they contain isn't sincere.

Spy

~ His full name is Jacques bon René.

~ He is 43 and 5'11.

~ He was born in Marseille, France.

~ For a rather large portion of his life, he was a foster kid.

~ Most of his childhood was spent on trains going all around France, with a service worker holding his hand until they reached their desired destination. He doesn't remember how many homes, or other miscellaneous places, he has been to.

~ He used to be a prolific bookworm, and at each house he moved to, he would always be seen tucked away somewhere with his nose in a book. As his job became more intertwined with his life, though, downtime to pick up a book became scarce.

~ Adding onto that, he is one of the best to go to for book recommendations. While many of his most common recommendations are French literatures, he has read a fair few English books he can lend over.

~ He had to have been around sixteen or seventeen when he had ran away from what would become his final "real" home. All he can really recall is a rude exchange of words, and himself storming off in a huff; never to be seen again.

~ Beautiful emerald-green eyes.

~ He's... kind of made a vow to himself to never rejoin society again. He doesn't exist, and he pretends to like it that way. So, having a son frightened him; and he ran away, fulfilling other contracts until he either died or forgot about it. Neither happened. So each time he sees Scout, there's still some lingering guilt.

~ Medic is not the only Mercenary in ownership of a feathered companion; as Spy owns a very spoiled, somewhat creepy raven known as Sophocles. The black bird stalks around his owner's smoking room like a shadow, but retreats to a golden cage to sleep in at night.

Miss Pauling

~ Her full name is Faith Pauling.

~ She's 22 and 5'8.

~ She was born in Bristol, England.

~ Ever since arriving in the States, she's managed to hide her accent very well. Only a few who've either caught her early in the morning, or are the Mercenaries, have heard her real voice.

~ Lots of her childhood is completely voided in her memory, and with how busy she's kept by The Administrator– her life, to her, is first being born and then working under The Administrator. She hardly has a minute in her schedule to think about her past, and I don't believe she'd care about it if she did.

~ She's forgotten her past for good reason, as it wasn't the prettiest or kindest childhood one could have.

~ For brevity's sake, we can just say that she was shipped off to The Administrator's at twelve years old for her own family's greedy ideals.

~ Lesbian (I can't stop thinking about the moment in the comics where she foregoes joining Scout in getting to safety just to oggle at naked Zhanna).

~ Miss Pauling no longer has any official personal records. She legally doesn't exist nor is remembered by anyone who has once known her; similarly to Spy.

~ She has a variety of small ways to keep herself occupied; fiddling with a pen, whistling or making clicking sounds, tenting her thumbs, and notably, organizing things. Unlike Engineer, she simply tidies things up to pass the time rather than fully rearrange a room.

[venussaidso]

The Ascendant Lord impacting your aura is real because tell me why I used to mistaken Jeremy Irons and Daniel Day Lewis for each other. And they still give me the same vibe yet share no nakshatras or nakshatra lords on their top 3 placements.

Jeremy Irons has his Sun in Uttara Phalguni.

Daniel Day Lewis has his Ascendant Lord (Jupiter) in Uttara Phalguni in the 2H. The 2H doesn't just rule over our assets and values, but also our face. The 2H literally gives support to our 1H | ASC and plays a role in our physique, and also aura (in my opinion).

Irons has a Ketu nakshatra (Magha) in the 2H in his chart while Lewis is a Mula Ascendant, Ashwini Moon. So it could be that I'm picking up on Ketu as well. Another thing, Irons has Venus in the 1H and Lewis has Bharani Sun.

They don't even look alike but the way they're so comparable to me can be validated by their nodal contacts too. Jeremy Irons has Rahu in Ashwini while Daniel Day Lewis has Moon in Ashwini.

There are probably other aspects I missed but 1H, 2H placements and the Ascendant Lord is validating enough as they further impact one's physique and aura. The nodes are important as Rahu stood out to me since they are both famous public figures (Rahu is essential when picking apart one's public image when there's established fame). Although yes, the top 3 placements will be extremely prominent– because I can still pick up on their stark differences. I do think this also looks like a random comparison. Like Jeremy Irons is a Pushya Ascendant, Uttara Bhadrapada Moon and Daniel Day Lewis is a Mula Ascendant, Ashwini Moon. The both of them literally have the double whammy effect of their lunar mansion's nakshatra lord which makes them more different than similar. But still valid how I managed to connect them together.

EDIT;;;;;;;

so i am not crazy, this shit felt by some. i'm not the only one who intuitively picked this up 🧘🏽‍♀️

uhm 💀

[lcandothisallday]

Hi sarah!! I was thinking what if you wrote Jeremy and reader being enemies to lovers but Jeremy never hated her, in fact he always liked her since high school and would try to impress her but it always went wrong which is why she thinks he hates her. Like him trying to show off in the gym at school and accidentally hits reader in the face with the ball and thats just how it all starts. 😮‍💨 That was alot but I think you could write this very well. If not, that’s okay too.

- 🌎anon

i fully didn’t do this request justice and it’s not edited properly so i apologize to all of you😩

Fool for you - Jeremy (WMCJ) x f!reader

You couldn't help your cringe as you entered your new gym. Money was tight so you had to downgrade which wasn't all that bad truth be told, but the sleezy men who kept staring at you and making crude comments as you walked by irked you beyond compare.

With a sigh, you put in your AirPods and play your music before you begin with the stairmaster. As you're climbing, from the corner of your eye you notice a man walking around with a massive bag and bottles of drinks that did not look FDA approved what so over.

You watched in curiosity as he stopped in front of every member, holding the drink up and promoting it like his life depended on it. It wasn't until you got a closer look at who the man was that your eyes widened.

"Oh hell no," you mutter under your breath, slowing down on the stairmaster. There he was--in all his odd hippy glory--Jeremy from high school, the same Jeremy that hated your guts and you never understood why.

You had always thought he was cute all throughout high school, his boyish charm, his curly hair and adorable dimpled smile--mixed with the fact that he was a basketball player, of course you had a little crush on him.

But he always made sure to show you he didn't feel the same. Emphasis on the show you part. There were countless times where you took a basketball to the head, had a drink spilt all over your school work, or simply teased beyond comprehension all in an attempt to embarrass you because he simply hated you.

When Jeremy finished up with one guy, he scanned the room for his next client victim when his eyes landed on you. His breath got caught in his throat as he watched you climb the stairmaster expertly, your thighs and ass taking the full work out.

With a deep breath, his nerves elated, he fixes his shirt by smoothing it down before he slowly begins approaching you.

Ironically, back in high school, Jeremy also had the fattest crush on you. He tried everything to get you to like him but it just continuously backfired because he was always so clumsy or tripping over his words, embarrassing not just himself--but you in the process too.

As you see the curly haired man approach you, you shake your head and immediately turn off the machine.

"Nope." you say sternly, your hand out to stop him in his tracks, cutting him off before he even got the chance to speak. His mouth was agape and eyes wide.

"I didn't even say nothing yet!" he exclaimed in defence. You scoffed and hopped off of the machine.

"I am not in the mood to get hurt today--whatever you're selling, I don't want it. You'll give me food poisoning," you mutter, shaking your head once again.

Jeremy's cheeks went red with embarrassment. "I wasn't uh...wasn't planning on selling you my detox drinks."

You roll your eyes and stare at the curly haired man with your hands on your hips in annoyance. "Is that what you do now?" you ask mockingly. "Given up on basketball and go around dressed like that selling detox drinks to gym bros?"

Truthfully, you didn't mean to sound that rude. You just weren't in the mood to interact with the guy that made your high school experience just a bit more unbearable.

Hearing your insult made Jeremy bite his lip and look down at his feet momentarily in shame. "Well I mean...wasn't exactly my plan...tore both my ACLs and didn't heal properly so I gotta make money somehow," he mumbled in response.

His response made you feel terrible. "Jeremy I'm sorry. That was rude of me," you apologize softly. "I didn't know."

"How could you?" he muttered sarcastically, causing you to frown.

"Look--you came up to me," you argued, crossing your arms over your chest. “Don’t get all sassy with me now,” you said while frowning.

Jeremy chuckled and ran a nervous hand through his hair. “Look…it’s been a while right? we’ve both matured—so why don’t you come to one of my games?” he suggested. “We can catch up after.”

You look at him in question with a slightly raised brow. You couldn’t deny that the adorable and hopeful expression on his face made your heart flutter ever so slightly. Maybe he has grown.

“Sure why not.”

It’s a few days later and you follow the directions that Jeremy had texted you with the location of where the mini ball games were being held. As you approached the stands and took in your surroundings, you began to feel bad for him. Graduating from highschool, everyone thought he was enroute to playing in the NBA so seeing him have to resort to playing in small competitions to keep his passion alive was something that was a bit disheartening—no doubt the feeling probably worse for him.

When Jeremy saw you take a seat in the first row, his heart beat quickened. “She actually came,” he muttered in disbelief under his breath, not having expected you to show up.

Kamal overheard and chuckled. “That her?” he asked for confirmation, Jeremy nodding. “Bro…no offence but she’s outta your league.”

Jeremy groaned. “Don’t you think I know that?” he whined. “I can never impress her—believe me I’ve tried.”

Kamal smirked as he teasingly patted his friend’s back. “Guess you gotta be on your A game, huh?”

The game went rather smoothly with you watching Jeremy with a smile on your face. He managed to not make a complete fool out of himself and you were impressed to say the least. It was nice to see that he still had game. 

On the final play of the game, Jeremy had the ball. He glanced over at you momentarily, which was possibly the worst idea he could’ve done because his nerves got the best of him and with full force, as he went to take a three, it air balled and hit you right in the head.

Some of the girls in the stands also watching the game, snickered, one even whispering “that had to be on purpose,” to her friend.

With a shake of your head, you begin to walk off, not wanting to give Jeremy the satisfaction. It really did feel like he invited you under false pretences of a truce when in reality his whole plan was to embarrass you again. A sick joke.

“Y/N I’m sorry!” Jeremy exclaimed, running after you and stopping you in your tracks as he gently reached for your arms.

“That one actually fucking hurt Jeremy!” you exclaim, turning to face him which is when he noticed the growing bruise on your forehead. “I get it—you hate me! Does my presence around you evoke some sort of violent behaviour or something?”

Jeremy furrowed his brows in confusion. “I don’t hate you. Your presence actually makes me nervous—”

“Okay well if you don’t hate me then why are you always throwing shit at me?!”

“It’s on accident!”

“Every single time?!??”

Jeremy groaned, “I like you!” he exclaimed in exasperation. “I turn into a Damn fool around you! Can’t talk or walk or play ball—thought I’d grown out of it,” he sighed. “Apparently not.”

You furrowed your brows as you stared at him. He sounded sincere. “You have absolutely zero game you know that?”

“Only around you.”

You tried to keep a serious face but you couldn’t help your small laugh. “You’re ridiculous,” you say with a playful shake of your head. “And the funny thing is I’m actually endeared by you which sucks because I genuinely think if I do something about it—I might end up dead one day with the way you are around me.”

Jeremy cheeks went red and he gave you a shy smile. “I’m hoping that isn’t the case. Let me take you on a proper first date. No basketballs around,” he breathed out.

You can’t hide your amused smile. “One date…to test the waters.”

Jeremy grinned, his hand coming up to access your bruise before his grin turned into a wince in shame. “M’ really sorry about this,” he mumbled.

“You’ll make it up to me.”

[violynt-skies]

donnie loves to dance and leo clearly has a knack for acting and they’re both dramatic as fuck and-

oh no they’re b o t h theatre kids

leo’s favorite musical would probably be smth like legally blonde.

but if asked he would say sm shit like spongebob so ppl think he’s just joking and don’t take him seriously bc he’s a little embarrassed abt it (tho it rlly isn’t a bad musical tho, it’s actually quite entertaining but ppl outside the theatre community wouldn’t know that lmfao)

donnie would probably be a fan of phantom of the opera or les mis?? gotta love the classics

but i also feel like he’d ironically like be more chill solely bc of the entire squip concept. tho he hates jeremy bc he’s such a simp the entire time lmfao. can relate to michael tho

they both love mamma mia and honestly who doesn’t

and also mean girls

leo can perform the entirety of candy store

I mean really just look at them you can’t tell me this isn’t some class A level theatre kid bullshit

i rest my case.

[frownyalfred]

What hair styles do you have in mid when you think of the Batfam? Their hair of course changes depending on the years and who draws them, but there's like a certain default style that each person typically gets drawn in. What is yours?

Despite being a very visual person, I usually don't get super fixated on how the character looks while I'm writing them. Is that odd? I'm not sure. There's a few exceptions (Lex in ASOH, Clark in bloodletting, etc) but usually I describe the outlines of what I want readers to notice, and let them fill in the stuff that isn't super important to my visualization.

But in general?

I like Dick's hair longer and slightly wavy. I think it's stupid he doesn't wear a helmet and has it out, especially long enough to grab a handful, but it's pretty. I get it. It's dark and has lots of layers.

Bruce's hair is just at the edge of what's acceptably long enough to be gelled back. Dark, but not quite as dark as Dick's hair. Thick, and he starts going grey at the temples around his mid to late thirties.

Tim -- anything that isn't a buzzcut, tbh. Bald Tim traumatized me. I think he has slightly lighter hair than the other Robins -- more of a dark brown. Gets a little red in the summer.

Jason, I like with more of a tapered fade with it longer on top to highlight his white streak. It's a little curly if he doesn't style/cut it.

Damian -- I don't have an opinion, though sometimes people draw him with really weird short hair to kind of make him seem childish on purpose? I think he should have Talia's hair tbh.

Cass, hot take -- it should either be really short so she can put it up under her cowl, or long enough to braid back. Having it in the middle and layered just means it's harder to keep manageable. (Before anyone jumps in to ask why I don't have the same problem for Dick, he refuses to wear anything on his head and has clearly accepted the risk of getting yanked around by his hair. Cass is smarter than that lol)

Steph -- same as Cass, I like her hair blonde but it's also very bright and recognizable which is a problem I have with Kate's hair too. If the hair is part of the costume and it's unusual, that's terrible for your secret identity. And if it's down all the time, it's sweaty and in your face. As someone who braids her hair back in the gym frequently, once it hits a certain length you really have to do something.

Duke -- I really love all of the various hairstyles he's had, but same issue as Cass arises. It's gotta fit under the cowl.

Bonus: Alfred. I love Jeremy Irons' version, I can't lie. His full head of hair but grey worked really well. Bald/thinning hair Alfred is a canon staple, don't get me wrong. But it gives him even more elegance/regality in my mind, you know? I love young michael caine as an inspo for him, those blonde curls were something else.

[goodbuckcharlie]

https://www.tumblr.com/goodbuckcharlie/744970952822095872/forbidden-things-jeremy-swayman-summary-its

ahhh love it!! part two would so goood!!!!! especially with steph, austin and mitch seeing how in love the two are

Warming up | Jeremy Swayman

Summary: Part two to Forbidden Things. Following up on their secret relationship no longer being secret, Steph, Auston, and Mitch start noticing how truly in love the two are

Warning: swearing, a little slut shaming (for like a second) and mention of blood/injury

Notes: I am glad people liked the last post :) I currently have a Cole Caufield x pro golfer story and a Luke Hughes social media Au both in the works but when I saw this comment I jumped back to this story. Let me know if you guys are interested in either one of those or idk maybe even a part two for my Nico story.

Steph definitely was the first to see how much Jeremy loved Mackie. She realized it at the family dinner that Mitch invited Jer to. It wasn’t even anything special, just watching how Jeremy interacted with the family, she knew he was the one for Mackie.

“So when Maddie set us up on a blind date, she forgot to mention that Mackie was the Executive chef at the restaurant we were going to.” Jeremy was telling the family how his neighbor who just so happened to be Mackie’s best friend, set the two together, “So we were served cold food ,like it wasn’t super cold, but Mackie definitely wasn’t happy. She excused herself and then went to the back. I could hear her scream ‘I’m on a date with a hot ass guy and you guys can’t do your fucking jobs? What the fuck do I pay you guys for!’ She then came back and acted like the whole restaurant didn’t hear her screaming. Let’s just say, I was ready to propose in that second.”

“Okay you are being a bit dramatic,” Mackie corrects, “You only heard what I said cause we were sat by the kitchen. The whole restaurant didn’t hear me scream.”

“Babe, the hostess looked terrified and the poor girl was on the other side of the restaurant.” Everyone laughs as Mackie gives a little pout, “Aw no need to get all pouty, I thought it was extremely hot. Still do.”

Jeremy pokes Mackie’s neck until she starts laughing.

“You know Jeremy, Mackie had a few boyfriends in high school, and none of them were ever able to hand our girl’s temper.” Mrs. Marner says while holding her husband’s hand and smiling in endearment, “They often called her too bossy and one even told her that her ego was unlady like.”

“Yeah Mitch was not happy when he heard that.” Mackie looks across the table at Mitch, who has been eyeing Jeremy, observing him like a Hawk, “When I came home crying, Mitch drove to the guy’s house and fought him.”

“This guy in a fight? I couldn’t imagine that.” Jeremy laughs and Mackie is surprised to see Mitch also laughing.

“Don’t get to excited bud, I lost that fight.” Mackie and Steph can tell Mitch is still hesitant about Jeremy, but it was a good sign to see the boys laughing together. Well until Mitch notices something.

“What the hell is on your neck?” Through the long day, Mackie never reapplied her makeup on her neck, so the darkest hickey is now visible.

“Would you believe me if I told you it’s a burn mark from my curling iron?” Mitch gives Mackie the angry brother look and she automatically know that mean he doesn’t believe her. Luckily Steph came to the rescue.

“Oh Mitch calm down, you know we were doing that same thing when we were her age.” Steph manages to keep Mitch calm and civil for the rest of the dinner.

At the end of the night as everyone was leaving, the restaurant started to play one of Mackie’s favorite songs. She hides her excitement, but Jeremy notices.

“Dance with me pretty girl.” He holds his hand out.

“Jer we are at a restaurant, we shouldn’t.” Steph is the only who is noticing the interaction, but she can’t help but smile.

“Nobody is going to kick us out for dancing, plus who cares if they do, your restaurant is 10x better anyway.” Mackie takes his hand and they start swaying along to the music. Mackie giggles as Jeremy spins her around and they almost knock over a table. But they don’t care they are in their own world.

In this moment, Steph knew Mackie was right and that Jeremy was her one.

Surprisingly Auston was the next to approve the relationship. And it was a total accident.

It was March, a whole month since All stars, and the Bruins were playing the maple leafs in Toronto.

Mackie had stayed at home in Boston. Jeremy was missing her during the roadie, but he knew after this game they would be at home for a while.

Auston was just walking around the backstage of the arena when he walked past Jeremy on the phone.

“Babe you know you don’t have to call me to get permission to go out with Maddie.” Jeremy says while smiling at his phone.

“Oh I know I just wanted an excuse to talk to you.”

“You are going to be the death of me.” Auston can’t help but eavesdrop. “While I have you here, show me what you are wearing out.”

Auston at first thinks the worst and thought that Jeremy was trying to be controlling, but his worry soon went away.

“Damn baby, you look so good makes me want to bail on the game and fly back home to see you.” Auston fake gags at Jeremy making comments like that to the girl he considers as little sister. “Is that my jacket?”

“Yeah Maddie wouldn’t let me borrow one of hers so I went over to your place and grabbed a jacket.”Austin wasn’t surprised to hear that Mackie had a key to Jeremy’s place.

“I would have let her borrow a jacket if she actually wanted to wear a jacket, not because our old ass neighbor was being a bitch.” An unfamiliar voice that Austin assumes is Maddie comes out of the phone.

“Maddie you said you wouldn’t say anything.” Mackie whines.

“Wait you guys are talking about that cougar that’s been trying to get in my pants since I moved in?” Austin can feel Jeremy get upset even as he hides in the corner, “What did she say?”

“She said, and I quote, you shouldn’t be going out like that when you have a man at home. It makes you look desperate.” Maddie said cause she knew Mackie wouldn’t.

“Fuck her. Mackie you look amazing in anything. If you like how an outfit looks, nobody and I mean nobody shall tell you different. Now take off my jacket and go have fun with Maddie, I’ll be there in the morning to nurse that hang over. And after that I’ll go talk to our neighbor, I’m not letting her get away with disrespecting you.”

That was all Auston needed to hear. He walked away satisfied with the conversation. Before this conversation, Auston didn’t think Jeremy and Mackie’s relationship was serious. Now he knows not only are they serious, but he now had a newfound respect for Jeremy.

At the end of the game, the bruins won 4 to 1. After his shower, Auston set out on a mission to talk to Jeremy. Luckily he finds him as he is heading out of the visitors locker room.

“Hey Swayman.” Jeremy looks up from his phone is surprised to see Auston.

“Oh hey.” Jeremy is a little skeptical, but knowing how important Auston is you Mackie he doesn’t question it.

“So I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but earlier I heard your phone call with Mackie.” He totally meant to eavesdrop but he wouldn’t admit it. “You’re a good man Swayman. And it might take a little more for Mitch to see it, but you really do love Mackie. And I’m glad she has someone like you.”

“Thanks Auston. You mean a lot to Mackie, so your approval is very important to her. And what’s important to Mackie is important to me.” Auston extends his hand out for a hand shake but Jeremy being Jeremy pulls him into a quick hug. “Now I got a plane to catch so I can see my girl.”

“We just finished the game and your already talking about that girl?” Brad Marchand hit Sways back and teases him, “You’re such a simp.”

“I’m a proud simp for Mackie Marner .” Both Auston and Brad laughs as Jeremy rushes out so he can hurry back to his girl.

Mitch by no means hated Jeremy and Mackie’s relationship, but the idea of his little sister dating anyone especially someone on the rival hockey team to his, didn’t sit right with him. But that was until, Jeremy did something that completely changed his perspective.

The maple leafs had just played the Bruins again this time in Boston. The leafs had decided to stay in Boston for a few days before leaving back to Toronto. So Mackie closed her restaurant for the day and decided to host both the leafs and the bruins for dinner. But a few things had gone wrong causing the girl stress.

It was the middle of the day so the staff had plenty of time to prepare everything. During this time, little things happened that all piled up causing Mackie to be on edge. Things such as some dropping knives or someone not following her instructions. She keeps her composure to the best of her abilities, since she doesn’t want to ruin the dinner.

Everyone started to arrive at 6:30 which was 30 minutes before the dinner started. Mackie doesn’t know because she is concentrating on the food. She is so concentrated that her staff even starts to worry about her.

“If you can’t chop it properly I’ll do it myself.” Mackie doesn’t mean to sound rude, but she doesn’t have time to apologize since her brain is currently running 100 miles per hours. She starts to cut veggies as fast as she can but because she is being careless, she cuts her finger. “Fuck, Eric please take over.”

She runs her hand under the sink hoping to stop the bleeding, but the cut was much deeper then she thought.

“Chef are you okay? you should probably get that checked out. It looks pretty deep.” Eric, one of the first chefs Mackie hired, finished chopping and check on Mackie. But as any girl can tell you, when you are trying not to cry and someone asks if you are okay or are you crying, you feel like you need to cry even more.

“it’s just a cut I’ll be fine.” She didn’t mean to raise her voice but her frustration caused her to do so. Jeremy who is talking to Mitch and Auston, hears Mackie and heads to the kitchen in concern not knowing that Mitch was right behind him.

When he entered the kitchen, everyone was working hard, but Mackie was no where in sight.

“After she yelled, she said sorry to me before she grabbed a cloth and ran off to her office.” Eric said standing next to the sink. “I can finish the dinner,but that cut of hers needs attention so could you try and get her out of the office.”

Jeremy quickly thanks Eric before heading to the office.

“Hey pretty girl, you wanna talk?” No response.

“Baby, we’ve talked about this you have to talk to me when you’re upset, we are a team.”

The door to the office opens and reveals a crying Mackie who is holding a bloody towel to her cut.

“I just wanted tonight to be perfect.” Jeremy pulls Mackie into a hug. “But before I got here Maddie and I got into a fight and I tried to ignore it to keep the night perfect, and then little things kept happening and now my stupid finger won’t stop bleeding.”

“Whatever you and Maddie are mad about I’m sure it’s nothing, you two are like sisters.” Jeremy sits Mackie down while looking at her cut. “And everyone out there loves you too, so no matter what you served us we would thinks it’s perfect.”

Mitch (just like Auston) listened in from outside the office to make sure his sister was okay but not to interfere in their moment. (Steph would be so proud)

“I know you are going to try and fight me on this but this cut is really deep. We should get you to a hospital.” Mackie shoots Jer a look of disapproval but before she can voice that disapproval, Jeremy stops her. “I will go get your brother and Auston, then we will carry you to the hospital.”

“Off the ice, I’m faster than all three of you.” Her confidence makes Jeremy smile in adoration.

“Seriously thought I’m no professional but how deep this looks I wouldn’t be surprised if you had nerve damage as well.” Jeremy has seen his fair share of hockey injuries as well has had to deal with his own so that is why this cut was so concerning.

“Could we go out the back door?” Mackie says through tears, “I don’t want Mitchy to see me cry.”

“Anything you want if that means you’ll go to the hospital.” Jeremy goes into Mackie’s purse and grabs a makeup wipe and hands it to her. “I know you’ll be upset if I let you go out with your mascara running so go ahead and wipe off your makeup as I go and tell everyone that you’re okay and where we are going.”

Mackie nods and Jer kisses her forehead before he leaves her office shutting the door behind him. He then sees Mitch.

“She’s alright.” Jeremy says not to relieve Mitch but almost as to relieve himself from his worry.

“I know she is, because she’s in good hands.”Jeremy is surprised when Mitch hugs him. It’s quick but still shocking, “She’s the most stubborn person I know, and that’s saying a lot because we are hockey players, but you are careful and collected with her. You are the one for her.”

Mitch tells Jer that he would handle telling everyone and to call him when the doctors know what’s wrong.

Despite the high stress of the situation, Jeremy couldn’t help but smile the whole time.

[safarigirlsp]

40 LOOKS DAMN GOOD

I saw this on Twitter and thought it'd be fun to do here as a mini celebration. Interaction has been so dead on here for everyone, it'd be fun to liven it back up! Everyone feel free to play along!

Favorite Movie(s)

The Last Duel! I love that movie. Blackkklansman is the runner up.

I actually don't care for most of his other movies at all in terms of the movie itself. 65, The Report, and Logan Lucky were decent, but definitely second tier.

Favorite Character(s)

Jacques, Flip, and Mills

Favorite Co-Star(s)

Ben Affleck blows absolutely everyone else out of the water! "Come In! Take your pants off!"

Bill Murray and John David Washington are runners up, and I loved Jeremy Irons in Gucci.

Favorite Love Interest(s)

None so far! Rey and Hanna are my absolute least favorites. I hate them, honestly. Jodie Cromer was my favorite female lead in one of his movies. Lady Gaga and Marion Cottilard were alright too. I like Scarlett Johannson the best as a stand alone actress, but I hated her character in Marriage Story. I anticipate liking Aubrey Plaza

Favorite Scene(s)

Jousting and kicking ass are hard to beat!

Favorite Sex Scene(s)

All the scenes from Last Duel! I don't care how offensive that is!

This scene from The Man Who Killed Don Quixote.

Girls seasons 5 and 6 were hard to beat. The couch scene in season 5 is pretty nice.

Favorite SNL Skit(s)

Slow for obvious reasons.

Undercover Boss Part 2

Favorite Line(s)

Dream Role(s)

I got a Knight with Jacques and an Action Hero with Mills, both of which were high on my list. I'd love to see him as a Vampire, a Dark Victorian Gentleman, an Old West Gunfighter, an Adventurer, and a John Wick style Hitman or Action Hero.

Oh, and he needs to be his actual age and not have goddamn face prosthetics, altered hairlines, or terrible fucking haircuts!

Dream Co-Star(s)

Love Interests: Angelina Jolie, Kate Winslet, Margot Robbie, Ana De Armas, and Lily Rose Depp for size kink purposes.

Co-Stars: Another hot guy like Goran Visnjic or Gerard Butler. Keanu Reeves would also be a blast.

Directors: Ridley Scott (again), Clint Eastwood, Tim Burton, Robert Eggars, Quentin Tarantino.

Favorite Photoshoot(s)

Favorite Candid(s)

Favorite Red Carpet Appearance(s)

Venice takes the cake!

Favorite Interview(s)

"Fuck you. I don't know."

"I hated this. Goodbye."

Favorite Moment(s) of Your Choice