#although im not sure if not posting stuff is part of it again

[ganondoodle]

recent panel i liked for chapter 2s rough draft (page 22), one of the more chaotic sketches

(comic wip)

[petday]

I make fandom art I make porn I make stuff that makes me miserable and I make stuff that makes me happy and I follow all the advice online but still nobody likes my art. I know it's good art and im not insecure about my talent level but no matter what I post or where I post it, nobody wants to like or interact with my art at all. I know people see it I know people are scrolling past without acknowledging what I make and it fucking sucks. I don't have friends to share stuff I make with and nobody online cares clearly. What do you do when nobody likes you or what you offer.

Good question. This response involves some of my history. I try to talk about my experiences at a comfortable distance. But please skip to the 'Solutions' part if you're bored.

My thoughts below:

It's painful. I have a lot of memories of high intensity pain due to no one engaging with me, at school and online. 'If I live in the same world as others, but it still feels like I am in a world with just myself, what is the point of trying to make things? Sure, I will feel better about myself as I grow, but I've still got no one to grow with, so I am just talking to myself. Amusing myself is fine, but I want to reach a level of fun above amusement, a level that others seem to reach so naturally.' 

In fact, maybe you are less 'outward' with your emotions, but as a child and teenager and young adult, there was a lot of screaming and crying and thrashing about 'not being granted the ability to make things others will seriously engage with me about.' 

(The pain remained after making a few friends during teenage years. The pain's attitude shifted slightly to accommodate this new life change of gaining friends. Much later, even after I became an artist with a large visible number of 'followers/people interested in something you make', the pain shifted its shape around this life change again. "People make bad assumptions of me because I have a big visible number in my profile and most websites do not give me the ability to hide that number." Summary: If your pain/frustration still remains after you gain a friend or find people who engage you, don't beat yourself up. Emotions don't work in such a way that the outcomes you desire are only guaranteed to make you happy and no other emotions will rise.)

Although I loved to look at art on websites since I was a child, one may assume I enjoyed the community aspect. I did, but only as a spectator for the vast majority of the time, since age restrictions and the harsh attitudes that exist to 'prevent the weak from touching the strong' was present in many of the sites I visited. Similar to how children get frustrated when another child cannot keep up with their play, but the child that is 'left out' can still enjoy watching other kids play from afar. It makes perfect sense to me these feelings will always exist in the world no matter what 'social media' websites people invent.

Anyway, two solution attempts in succession I tried over long-term:

1. My first attempt at a solution was immersing myself in a fantasy world I created in my mind and I held my imagination in high esteem. "I know my imagination takes influence from the things I read and admire, so it's not such a lonely world anyway." Creating episode lists of imaginary cartoon episodes and such, so dedicated to something I hardly told anyone about. It felt good. But my friends had original characters too, and they could describe their personalities and dynamics to others naturally and quickly, likely due to their earlier experiences with 'communicating ideas to others.' I was quiet and envious. Although it was fun to play with the imaginary characters in my head, I decided to take another step. Of course I could not simply go back in time to gain the similar social experiences my friends had. But I could use that desire to 'go back in time' to 'go forward in time' and gain the experience.

2. Engage in others first. Because I spent a long time in my imagination, I felt more secure about myself, so I wanted to extend the feeling of 'caring about my own work' to 'caring about others' work on an equal level.' The internet allows you to assess people before engaging to see if your compatibility might be okay. If someone had posts that resonated with me, I tried to say 'hello, I like what you posted/I like your drawing because [...]' Even if the contact ended there, it was a good practice. Gently communicate with people over time. Especially since I am sure there are people who rarely receive questions about their artworks who would love someone to engage with them as well. Of course do not do this in a 'pity' sense – you have to genuinely find something that 'touches your heart' and if the artist seems to not get much curiosity in regards to their art, you can go ahead and try to express your curiosity to them. Keep posting whatever you like, but if you engage with others, you may find someone engaging with you without even expecting it, and that is fun.

(I think society should practice finding genuine value in things they like even if they see nobody has touched it. Not pity, but removing the "does anyone else like this? If I see no one else liking this, it must be a bad thing to like, so I won't engage" attitude. Some of my favourite artwork has maybe 5 visible 'bookmarks/favorites' on an art-focused website.)

[wbtsan]

THE 9TH MEMBER - CHAPTER 1

synopsis. nabi (aka you) has been training for just over 3 years and when you heard you were going to debut, you were super excited to meet your members. although, you were taken aback when you heard that your members were all boys.

pairing. female!reader x ateez!members | tags. the most tiniest angst ever, members angry, nothing else (i think) | genre. fluff | wc. 510+ | masterlist

author note. ahh my first ever series on this blog !! writing this was super fun and i loved all of it !! my mistakes for posting this really late, i recently got my dream job and have been focusing on it! do not worry, i will slowly make my return to writing soon <3

networks. @newworldnet @illusionnet @starlit-network

when you first got news of getting accepted into this new company, you couldn't believe your eyes. all this hard work and effort seemed like it was worth it after all.

"we have a slight problem." your manager says. uh oh. this is going to turn very bad.. "as you would've known we don't have much girl trainees here at the company and since we were aiming for a 5 member girl group, we've decided to do something you probably won't like."

"me!? in a boy group?! b-but, im a girl! wouldn't it be weird if a girl - who is not a boy - is in a boy group?" your face dropped at the sudden announcement. not being able to debut was probably a way better choice than having to debut with boys. "look, we know this came as a shocker but, its really beneficial for you!" your manager tries to say happily. "tomorrow, you'll be meeting the members. trust me, they're really nice!" the staff tries to say before you groan annoyed as you stormed off. "why am i debuting in a boy group? wouldn't i be hated at? wasn't it better if i just debut solo? why am i going to debut with random boys?!" you thought.

-

"what?! a girl?" hongjoong says in shock. over the last 5 years, it's always been just the 8 of the boys together. but now that nabi will debut with ateez, that means there'll be more pressure on hongjoong. from reproducing the songs to recording all of nabi's parts, he gets annoyed over this. "why are we having a girl in our group!? do you not understand the pressure ill be put under!? i have already worked long hours for us to come this far, wouldn't it just be a waste if we have to remake ALL our songs?" hongjoong angrily says. "calm down hongjoong, im sure she'll be a great addition to our group." seonghwa calmly says, trying to calm him down. "exactly! i think having a girl will be a great addition to the team plus, it'll be really good for you guys to have a new friend!" the manager says.

hongjoong sighs before accepting his fate. "fine, but if she isn't what you say she is, then im going to make her first day her last." he says before storming off. the members rub their forehead in devestation as the meeting room stays quiet. "well, how are we going to deal with a girl?" mingi says. "no idea, but we need to give it some time. if we rush her into doing stuff, she'll get uncomfortable and then we'll get in trouble." seonghwa adds on from mingi's statement. "plus, ive heard there were some trainees here who are snitches. hopefully she isn't one of them." wooyoung mentions. "well now that we're talking, you guys will meet her.. tomorrow!" the manager says. "TOMORROW!?" the guys say together. "yes yes, bit of a shocker but im sure you'll be fine!" the members sigh in annoyance before the manager leaves them, the room filling with silence again.

tagging : @taz-97

[x-liv25-jamieswife]

my ranking of the tig/tgg ships. this is my opinion (i think that gigi will end up with slate but since we literally dont know anything about them, i’m not including them obviously). this will probably change as the rest of the tgg series is released (although the first spot wont ever change). i love every single ship on this list. just cause one is at the bottom of my ranking doesnt mean i dont like it.

1. avery and jameson: i think this is quite obvious if you know me. they're my favorite ship in the entire world. their dynamic, banter, development, tension, chemistry etc is just out of this world. none of the ships in the tig universe will ever compare to these two. no words will ever be able to properly describe how much i love them.

2. hannah and toby: i think about what these two could've been a trillion times a day. we don't even know that much about them yet they still manage to be on of my favorite ships of all time. i'm so excited for their novella (even though i know its going to destroy me). they're the epitome of right person wrong time (aka one of my least and most favorite tropes). toby's letters to hannah have made me cry more times than i'd like to admit and everything about them is just pure perfection.

3. libby and nash: again, we don't know much about them but they're literally so adorable and complement each other so well. i wasn't very sure about them at first because i felt like libby was just another one of nash's projects and not an actual love interest, but i now absolutely love them. i love how libby went from sort of not liking him to falling in love with him (she never said she didn't like him but whenever he was around in tig, she would tell him to shut up and stuff) while nash just immediately fell for her. i'm so excited to read more about them in games untold. im sure the fluff is gonna be tooth-rotting (im hoping they're story is gonna help me recover after reading tobannah's novella)

4. savannah and rohan: i honestly really love their dynamic and banter. the tension between the two of them was unmatched and i'm really excited to see where this is gonna go. rohan is so down bad for her its crazy (this dude would not stop thinking about her). rivals who cant keep their hands to themselves, vow to destroy each other, and then become lovers? fuck yeah.

5. max and xander: the only reason they're not higher is because we don't know a lot about them. that doesn't mean i do not absolutely adore them though. i think max and xander are perfect for one another. i feel like they're each other's confidants and only allow themselves to be vulnerable around the other. they're also super unproblematic which i love (no angst (that we know of), just fluff). i think they make each other happy and that's the most important thing.

6. lyra and grayson: i feel like this is the most controversial part of this post. most people really love them but, personally, they're not my thing. i do like them and find them cute, but i just feel like jlb has written better romance. this is obviously subject to change because the rest of the series isn't out yet. they complement each other really well and all, but i just think that they're sort of plain (i don't mind plain when the couple isn't the main focus (like maxander and libbynash), but lyrason is one of the main ships so i just expected more). i also think they're rushed. i know that there will be complications in the next two books and that they're not officially together, but i feel like they shouldn't have kissed at the end of book 1 and stuff (i wanted to add that there's a difference between rohannah's kiss and lyrason's kiss. lyrason already have feelings for one another (their kiss was romantic and fluffy). rohannah on the other hand kissed each other simply because they're physically attracted to one another, they don't have feelings for each other yet. ig you could say lyrason's kiss felt more like an ending (if that makes sense??? idk how to describe it). i want to reiterate that this is my opinion and i do like them, i just think there's better.

6. rebecca and thea: i really like their story, their angst, and the two of them together, but my hatred for thea keeps me from loving them. thea is one of the worst characters in tig (excluding the villains) and i feel like rebecca deserves better. although, like i said, i do like the two of them together, i don't think they're endgame. i think thea is a little unhealthy for rebecca (i mean, thea knew that rebecca struggled with her self worth and shit and still chose emily over her relationship with rebecca the night emily died). idk i feel like thea's priorities aren't straight, and she needs to get therapy and realize that some of her behavior isn't right before committing to a relationship with rebecca (i also think rebecca isn't in the right state of mind to be in a relationship. she needs to find a way to overcome her self-esteem issues before entering a serious relationship with thea. i feel like if she doesn't, their relationship would just become toxic and unhealthy because rebecca wouldn't stand up for herself when needed). i have a lot more to say, but i'm probably just gonna make another post about it.

honorable mention: emily x trash. i think they have a lot of chemistry and they should probably be first but im not ranking them cause emilys dead and the trash deserves better.

its like midnight for me as im writing this so i apologize if some of this doesn't make sense. again, this is my opinion, and you are obviously entitled to your own.

[jevilowo]

List of Tf2 inconsistenties that piss me off

Bc its 1am and im staying awake while beloved mutual Jo livetexts me while they watch venom (I'd tag them but they blocked tf2 tag)

The timeline presented in the Shakespearicles post. Just read it yourself its sosisoso frustrating

The claim in the Shakespearicles post that mankind gave up inventing until 1921. What do you call Radigan in the 1890s then idiot.

Different claims on Merasmus' age (older than the universe in doommates, vs 6000ish in the lore comics) (this means the universe is 5999ish i guess okay)

Scout claims in comic 4 that he met Ms Pauling 6 years ago. Medic claims the mercs have shared "at least" 8 halloweens together. Despite both of these, the catch up comics imply the gravel wars with our mercs only took place over one summer. The first two are supposed to be meta jokes I think (ms pauling debuted in the war update comic, 2009, 5 years before comic 4 [miscalculations again??], and the first scream fortress was also 2009, 8 years before comic 6) but come onnnn be consistentttt.

Australian women had moustaches in the 1890s, but Mags doesn't? I've blamed this on long term Australium Depletion but its still annoying.

Saxton Hale claims its 2010 on the mannconomy update page, but the corresponding comic takes place in the 60s. I'm presuming this means the comic takes place on a different part of the timeline from Saxton’s notes but okay.

The crazy wild Australium retcon. So Sniper was created in 2007 to be australian. Then they invented Saxton Hale for Spy vs Sniper in 2009. Then people liked him so he became important. So in 2010, the engineer update invented Australium (although it was alluded to as early as the classless update a bit before that) and the corresponding comic claimed it made all australians buff. Despite this, in 2011 Sniper's parents were given very not buff, probably bc the artist was hella rushed at the time and had no time to reread the engineer update stuff. Then the comic writer remembered scrawny bastard Sniper was Australian, although maybe the regular writers were cooking excuses for that before then. So we got the New Zealand excuse in 2014 (im pretty sure), but that still didn't explain away his parents looking normal. Thus, my australium depletion theory. Valve should just hire me at this rate smh.

Silas Mann. They were setting him up to be somewhat important I'M SURE OF IT. They even retconned a mann co "quarterly concern" from the classless update to include his name for the engineer update! And they changed the cover slightly. Can't tell if this is a retcon or some abandoned "they tried to cut him out of history" sideplot thingy to explain how Silas became the Horsemann. I'm still holding out hope he returns in comic 7.

Abe Lincoln died two different ways and still became a mercenary? I excuse this as he faked his death a little too well (some blueprints imply it in the engineer update)

Speaking of, a coin claiming he invented the rocket jump despite MY BOY SHAKESPEARICLES. GAH.

This is just off the top of my head, mind you, and i haven't finished lore research. Expect many more grievances.

But yeah no in conclusion the writers need a calculator and also to consult each other more often so they don't contradict each other

[quickstappen]

track 004: love, where are you?

A/N: i am so sorry, i know it's late, but college sucks (im juggling learning 3 languages at once - filology students am i right??) and my job also sucks (i don't recommend editing photos honestly) - but here we are, again, twitter heavy, i swear the plot is coming :)) also - ignore the dates, 'm too lazy to change them

A/N 2: previous parts of this series have been edited! most notable - Marci's a Ferrari employee, not Redbull like before

masterlist | previous next

liked by marcilazzaro1, sarah_scott and others

clairobernie_x a natural progression of the night (italians sure knows how to party)

see all comments...

sarah_scott when is my invite coming? i wanna party with you too

↳ clairobernie_x gotta get the connections first babe

↳ sarah_scott well, can't really get with pierre, my boyfriend would definitely mind

↳ clairobernie_x yeah, fair lol

↳ marcilazzaro1 you're invited next year, how about that?

↳ sarah_scott lovely stuff 🥰

shithappens is that... marci? flashing someone? i'm in love

ilpredestinatox jesus i love this duo

quickstappen the annual media team party!!

marcilazzaro1 remind me to never drink with you again

↳ clairobernie_x you loved it

zoebryne_x how are y'all so hot

view more...

marcilazzaro1 posted a story!

2 MONTHS LATER

liked by mickschumacher, charles_leclerc and others

brunolazzaro_03 welcome to crisis-ville, sarah_scott this is entirely your fault

tagged: marcilazzaro1, federrere

(this is a private account, you cannot reply to this post)

see all comments...

charles_leclerc oh god, straight from the bottle? what did you do to this woman

↳ brunolazzaro03 trust me, this isn't even her lowest moment from this month

↳ marcilazzaro1 dude?? stop exposing me

↳ brunolazzaro03 or what.

↳ marcilazzaro1 i have tonio's phone number

↳ brunolazzaro03 YOU WOULDN'T DARE

↳ charles_leclerc do i even wanna know who tonio is?

↳ marcilazzaro1 his boyfriend ;)

↳ brunolazzaro03 HE'S NOT

sarah_scott i deny all my involvement in this crisis

↳ marcilazzaro1 of course you do

↳ sarah_scott hey! i only gave you an idea, not tell you to spiral

mickschumacher is she like... okay?

↳ brunolazzaro03 first off, has she ever been?

↳ mickschumacher true

↳ marcilazzaro1 catching strays left and right in my own home, unbelievable

lance_stroll remember to hydrate or whatever

↳ marcilazzaro1 i am

↳ lance_stroll with WATER

↳ marcilazzaro1 didn't jesus turn water into wine?

↳ lance_stroll you are hopeless

federrere hey what the fuck, that's my shirt??

↳ marcilazzaro1 well, i have news for you then

view more...

Marci's messages:

S: Mick showed me Bruno's post

S: Are you okay?

M: Yeah, I'm good, just...

M: A lot of things on my mind I guess.

S: Yeah, I get that. If you ever need to run away my doors are always open.

M: I might take you up on that right before the preseason testing. Need to survive the trip with Lewis first tho, I have no idea what he has planned.

S: Good luck with that.

S: See you soon Marci.

4 MONTHS LATER

8 MONTHS LATER

nicolashamilton just posted a story!

madi's radio: just to note again, this series has been edited, i heavily suggest checking out the previous parts again, although you can probably work it out on its own too. thanks to @anthonykatebridgerton putting this idea in my head ;)

taglist: @sunny44 @rockyhayzkid @biancathecool @unluckyyoshi @woozarts @janeholt3 @celestialend @formulaal @d3kstar @yoremins @rd1410-blog @mess-is-my-aesthetic @callsignwidow @blaaahblubb @evans-dejong @lwstuff @emilyval1 @r0seandth0rns @fletchingarcher @blaaahblubb @notyaslol @dear-fifi @zimm04 @thewritingofspencerrose @elliegrey2803 @anthonykatebridgerton @firetruckstuckley @casperlikej @anephemeralwoe @vroomvroommuppett @taytaylala12 @kuskumu @clemswrld @bella-1 @leclercdream @evie-119 (xxx - couldn't tag you)

click here to be added to the carved my name taglist!

DISCLAIMER: i do not know anything about this people, this is not real life, this is just something for fun, i do not know anythings about their life or personalities!

[themoodyestj]

Hello, my beloved.

today i bring you a list of stuff you can try to not be so bitter and miserable all the time.

1. breath slowly, in and out, relax.

2. take a nap

3. eat a cookie

4. listen to some music

5. touch some grass

6. get laid ( if no one wants you, hands and a picture of Dee are valid too!)

7. hug your pet ( or a cactus if you don't have a pet)

8. practice acceptance (Dee is the Queen and you're never going to be her and Jensen is never going to fuck you)

9. find someone you actually like and admire, and fan over that person (not some guy you think is a mediocre actor and a pushover who can't stand for himself and needs idiots from the internet to defend him from his wife)

10. remember that i love you, and this is not hate, just constructive criticism because i want you to be better.

❤️ your secret admirer

Awww, my secret admirer again. :D Does that mean I'm getting flowers everyday now? So happy to see you, honey. Thanks for all the advice, I take them to heart. Although, sadly, I have to say I'm not as bitter or as miserable as you may want me to be. I do have a family, two cats and a dog, and a career. I do get laid quite often and im a fierce advocate of lone intimacy. Super healthy, I do it all. But also, I have an opinion. One that ruffles many many feathers, but in case you didnt notice, I don't quite care. But hey, if it feeds your delusion that all people who disagree with you are sad and lonely, by all means, stick to it. We dont want you having a psychotic breakdown, do we? Lets try to avoid that at all costs. I gotta say, number 8 sent me. We don't all have the same aspirations in life. Perhaps you'd like to sleep with Jensen (cause honey, the projection is strong here) and you use Dee as a heavy self insert, but I honestly dont want to. It is perfectly ok to like someone (and at the same time critique someone) and not want to sleep with them. I know, mindblowing, right? Such a complex concept, Im sure you find it hard to grasp. But just because its hard for you to understand, it doesnt make it less real. I bet a lot is really hard for you to understand, so...

Danneel being a queen? Of what exactly? Honey, I don't want to be her, I wanna be me. Should i aspire to be someone, it would be a woman who in fact has a flourishing career, and not someone whose assets are basically marrying someone. I'd aspire to be someone with talent, inteligence, gumption. Not someone who still rides on the small parts she played in the past because she knows there isnt much really going on for her. Someone who overpriced her pictures at Wales Con expecting to have a great reception only to find a very small line for her and feeling desperate enough to take pics with her kids insteadto feel relevant. You know, Id actually be less critic of her if she was more honest about herself. If she wasnt so fast to take jabs at her own husband when she herself has very little to offer. But hey, if thats your Queen... By all means. She definitely isnt mine. I dont think Jensen is mediocre. I think he let himself go a little. I think he was happier in SPN days and I miss that light, to be honest. Maybe ill see him improve in his next projects and ill be the first to applaud him for that (and ill post about it too, so stay tuned). As of lately... Ive seen a man who plans a concert with no AC, struggling to sing, I see a man who's tense next to his wife, I see a man who seems to be self medicating to cope and that worries me. I do hope he improves, I wish him no harm. But of course this doesnt help your delulu, so i know your brain will totally ommit what i just wrote. Ok, this is all the attention youre getting now. Im starting to think you do actually love me, cause this was fun! You delulus never fail in giving me a good hearted laugh! See you soon, secret admirer!

[kidrauhlschik]

4. Tangled Memories - Lee Know AU

Post Traumatic Amnesia (PTA) is a transient state of confusion, disorientation and memory loss that occurs immediately following a traumatic brain injury. PTA is sometimes also referred to as post traumatic confusional state and can occur from the moment of injury until the return of continuous memory.

The accident was a tragedy.

But it was the best tragedy to ever happen to you.

-

-

Final Part - See pt 1, 2, & 3 on the Masterlist linked above

Warnings: angst, f!reader, enemies to lovers, drunk driving, gaslighting, Fighting, yelling, cursing, angst, heartbreak, lies, angst, accidents, not proofread, minho is mean, lmk if I missed anything!!

Words: 2.2k

-

You find the note the next morning and immediately crumple it up and throw it in the trash. Since when has Minho been so sentimental and needy?

You can understand that he's over whatever rivalry he two of you used to have, but you're not. Up until the day before, you thought Minho was good, perfect even, but opening your eyes and remembering all of the awful things he's made you deal with made things so much different.

For starters, you can't believe that you trusted him. He's just as manipulative and sneaky as he's always been. He took advantage of your vulnerable state and made you depend on him. He would have been okay with you dying that day and all of the sudden he's not.

Yet, he also coaxed you down from your panic attacks, he made sure to always available for when you needed him, he stayed with you around the clock when you were injured. Thing is, you wouldn't have gotten injured if it wasn't for him.

The back and forth is overwhelming so instead of pondering on the fact you go to check your phone, which probably made things even worse.

Chris: He told me. Im so sorry. Its all my fault.

Innie: Wanna talk? I heard what happened.

Seungmin: I can't believe you didn't tell us you were remembering stuff.

Hyunjin: I'm sorry for keeping you in the dark. We need to talk.

Lix: Hey wanna come over? I can make us brownies and we can talk things out.

Changbin: Are you okay?

Jisung: Minho is really sorry. I am too. We all are. Can we talk it out?

Chris: Please?

Not wanting to deal with everything right now, you shut your phone off and begin your day. It's time to clean up and enroll in classes again. You should probably catch up with your other friends as well, you'd been very distant because you were always hanging out with Minho. It's best to keep busy and avoid thinking about that snake.

Tragically, as snakes would have it, Minho manages to slither his way inside your thoughts on a regular basis for the next month. As much as you hate it, you couldn't help seeing him in everything. He was in your sheets, in your kitchen, next to you on the couch, in the park, in the flowers, and in the sunset. Everything reminded you of him, every version of him, the bad and the good, and you're not sure which one you prefer.

Classes were to start in a week, through your circumstances, the school was able to let you enroll late to your classes, but you were now a year behind. There's so much to catch up on, yet your brain allows something to distract you from your studies, and that something is always Minho. He hasn't made an effort to make contact with you, which reassures you that whatever he had going on was all made up in his head. Maybe it was all a moment of hysteria.

The hysteria felt awfully real to you though. You can't help but doubt yourself and ask if the sleezy, ignorant, cold Lee Minho actually felt something for you, or if you felt something for him. That's why it's better to keep busy rather than to sit and ponder.

Chris: Wanna come over? It'll just be me and Jisung :)

You had forgiven the guys awfully quickly for your predicament. You could see why they'd put Minho in that situation in a moment of anger, they didn't even know that you were remembering your past, and although you wished they would have stepped up more to impede the shit show that happened with Minho, you can tell that they're sorry. They're your best friends after all, but you were still keeping them at an arms distance for the time being. Except for Hyunjin. He always encouraged you to chase after Minho and you couldn't help but too feel betrayed at that. No one else pushed you into his arms but Hyunjin did, and who knows? Maybe if he hadn't, you could've remained civil with Minho instead of playing house.

When you walk inside of Chan's dorm, the smell of warm pizza welcomes you like a warm hug.

"Hey! How are you?" Jisung asks from the couch beside Chan.

"I'm good, thank you." You offer a small smile in return as you take off your coat to lay it on the nearest clean, flat surface.

The place is a mess, there a cups everywhere, the trash is overflowing, and the entire floor had become a laundry basket. "I don't keep you guys in check for a year and all of the sudden your place becomes a pigs den?" You laugh while sprawling yourself on Chris' couch, throwing your legs over Jisung.

"Hey! It wasn't us, it was -" Jisung gets cut off by Chan discretely pinching his leg under the blanket. The younger winces but remains silent.

"Yeah, Jisung's been a mess lately." Chris smiles apologetically.

"Haha. Yeah, sorry." Jisung adds.

You couldn't help but feel as if they were hiding something, but before you could question them, the front door swings open.

"Jisung. What the hell do you want? I was in the middle of practice." The second Minho spots you, he freezes like he did before. Loss for words, he just stares at you as if he'd seen a ghost. He wants to walk out and get as far away from you as he can, but he also wants to run up to you and hold you in his arms. He wants to apologize over and over again, he wants to beg for your love, but he knows better than to think that you'd accept him.

You immediately hop off the couch, quickly on guard, wishing that he wasn't standing in front of you. Seeing him in your memories was very different than seeing him in real life. He looked thinner, tired, and restless. The Minho you had been seeing for the past year looked happy and healthy. Now he was drowning in his hoodie, his hair was messy, and his expression read exhaustion. You couldn't help the worry that seeped its way into your brain.

"What are you doing here?" You ask.

"I live here." Still staring at you in shock, unfortunately, it seemed that he'd gotten even better at hiding his emotions.

"What about your place?"

"I got kicked out for not maintaining the place while I lived with you."

Was he implying that this was your fault?

"You never had to live with me in the first place." An argument. Something you were both so used to, now caused an ache in both of your chests. Your words catch at the base of your throat, and Minho doesn't even have the energy to argue.

Minho finally takes his eyes off of you, scanning the area, looking at the mess he'd made at his friends dorm. The past month had been hell for him. He kept on beating himself up anytime he had a second alone with his thoughts. The only good thing he had done since he left your place was joining the school's dance team, hoping that doing something he enjoyed could take his mind off of you. He was wrong. Every time he showed up to practice, he remembered that you were the only reason he was doing this, not giving up on his dream. He was undereating and overworking himself to the bone, which was not the healthiest coping mechanism but the other option was to rot away in the couch.

He nods and makes a move to turn away, leaving the dorm again.

"Don't walk away Lee Minho!" He pauses his steps but doesn't turn around.

"You wanted me to leave."

"It's not that easy! I don't know what I want okay? I'm in shambles. I want you to leave, but I want you to come back right after. I want you to cry but it hurts to see you in pain. I trust you but I hate you. Worst of all I love you, but I don't even know what's real anymore." You throw your arms up in desperation, not even realizing that Jisung and Chris had left the area long ago. "I just want to know what's real."

Minho finally turns to look at you with an expression that can best be read as indignation. Or was it desperation?

"You want to know what's real? The real thing is that I want to know every part of you, every scar, every bruise, I want to trace the map of you! All of you and every thing about you. My fingers a compass, and your freckles the constellations that I will chart in my heart. That way, when I close my eyes I'll have you in my stars forever, because guess what? You're already in everything else! You're in the sun, in the air, and in my reflection. I'm drowning in the memory of you and the worst part is that I can't even see you!" Minho walks towards you but you stay frozen in place.

"It's never been the way you looked, it was always the way you were. You were like me, both broken and angry. It wasn't until I saw you behind the walls and I was able to see you bare. I would have fallen in love with you with my eyes closed, but I never could because we never allowed each other the chance. You told me that you didn't want to be the shell of who you are, so why can't you let yourself be happy?" He's face to face with you know, a mere couple of feet apart. He was no longer loud, but more so calm. His plea turning into a confession.

"From the moment I saw you making a fool of yourself in that park, I knew that you were worth the broken heart. Finish breaking my heart, and you'll find yourself inside. I'm sorry, but I'll never find the right words for you. You are my everything, always, and even that is not enough."

"Minho stop." Somewhere in the middle of his speech, your eyes decided to betray you and tears were now freely streaming down your face.

"I'm glad I found you, the real you, because before you, I never knew what to wish for. Want me to be honest?" He laughs and runs his fingers through his hair. "I'm terrified of letting you in. I'm scared to see myself more clearly through your eyes, wondering if I'm good enough. I already lost you, but the truth is that not having you scares me more than all the other truths of love. So please, look at me in the eyes and tell me that I'm not being real right now."

He's mere inches away from you, searching for an answer on your face.

So many thoughts but no clear answer runs through your mind, you're just overwhelmed by his confession, the situation, his mere presence, is not letting you think clearly whatsoever. So you break eye contact and make a bee line for the door. While holding the door knob, you stop and say your last words.

"Sorry Minnie."

Minnie.

The one term of endearment that Minho allows to give him hope.

-

Of course on the first day of class you'd be running late. You hated being late and the stress of studying is weighing heavy on your shoulders. How could the morning be any worse?

Luck is a funny thing though. Just when you think things couldn't get worse, they always do.

You bump into someone that simply continues walking, making you drop all of your notecards and papers on the floor. You immediately bend down to begin collecting everything, but there is so much going on around you. People playing around, others trying to find a seat, and more reuniting with their friends after the summer. So much people, so many noises, this is why you're never late to anything. The stress begins to build even more, to the point where your hands begin to shake, needing to move faster in order for you to find your own seat.

His hand comes out of nowhere. Body shoving away the people that were stepping on your stuff, rushing to pick everything up to help you. He hands everything he collected in a neat pile and you cautiously take it. He then turns to the nearest desk on his left, grabbing two coffees and handing you one.

"Hey, I'm Lee Minho. Looks like we're in the same class. Wanna sit together?"

Starting from where you left off was messy, but maybe starting from the beginning wouldn't be so bad. It will take time, but it might be worth it. If everything was real, it will definitely be worth it and more.

"I'm Y/N. I'm down, but I have to warn you, I can be a bit mean at times."

He laughs and hovers a hand on your lower back to guide you to the two empty seats next to each other.

"I wouldn't change that for the world." He gives you a small smile that could also be a smirk. He had the audacity to be cocky?

Despite that, you can't help the little ray of sunshine that warms you from the inside.

“I hope you mean that Lee Minho.”

“I always mean what I say.”

-

A/N: okay, i am not in love with the ending but honestly if it was up to me, i would've ended it on the last chapter. I'm trying something new w happy endings. Thank you so much for reading!!

TAGLIST: @stanstraykidsskz @weareapackofstrays @linos-kitten @cassidymb121

[princessmanamia]

(The following is age regression related, if you dont like it dont read it, please and thank you!)

Caregiver Billy x Agere Fem Reader

(Post star court billy)

A super long, Hella fluffy, drable

TW: cursing and uh idk cigarettes (i mean its billy hargrove)

(I DO NOT CONSIDER MYSELF A GOOD WRITER SO SORRY IN ADVANCE FOR THE LONG ASS DRABLE)

✨sleep tight little bunny✨

You feel like You’ve hardly slept in the last 3 days. The nightmares were back again, To be fair the coming of cooler weather brought the fear that the residents of the upside down might return. It had been several months since the star court incident. Although Life for the most part was..well….normal again? The group had now gained a new member, Billy, which…definitely took some getting used to.

Needless to say the near death experience and learning about the horrors of the “upside down” changed him. Billy was no longer a complete ass to steve or max, hes still a bit cold and stand offish but nowhere near the levels from before. With Billy now in the group that ment one more classmate got to learn about your…um quirky tendencies? Well thats how you’d like to put it to others who dont know, but to the group of teens you hang out with…they know it’s a coping mechanism. Steve, Robin and dustin deal with your age regression the most, although the entire group of kids know and occasionally set up “little days” just being carefree.

Billy however is still a bit confused by all this. it’s definitely weird, not as weird as being attacked and nearly killed by a giant monsters, and being around a girl with superpowers but still odd and new? His summer experience had completely changed him, the old billy would have made your life a living hell. Hes tried to be sweet and brotherly, believe me it peaks through, but he also knows you tend to hide your “little side” if hes around (Steve and a couple of kids let him in on that part). Hell he used to be a bully, he gets it, the fear was still there….though He’d be lying if he wasn’t curious as to why group was so fond of “little” you

But here we are…..

Somehow you found yourself being picked up by none other than billy hargrove.?? Uh what?

All you wanted was some fresh air.

You were just sitting on your front porch steps, head down in a sleepless daze with your leg bouncing from being just overall tired and jittery. When a familiar car stops out front.

“Hey!! You seen Harrington?” You slowly looked up and shook your head.

“nope sorry hes still at work”

“Damn it”

“hes not off work for a couple hrs, what do you need?”

“Nothing…it’s personal, you ok? You look like hell.”

“Oh fuck you, it’s also personal” you groan and rub your temples looking up at the grey clouds that gathered above.

“Uhhuh, ya sure about that?”

“Look im ok I just haven’t slept much in a couple days.” You didnt even bother looking back down but You could tell Billy’s blue eyes were just staring you down, and after a few moments you heard his car door open. “Get in” Billy had leaned over to open the passenger door. You didn’t want to go with him, but you didn’t want to feel like a sitting duck in your own home either so you groaned, made your way over and plopped down on the seat. It was pointless to argue with him, so you sank into back of the car seat and looked over, “uh ..so whats the plan here exactly?” “Gonna kill two birds with one stone” he mumbled as he took off in the direction of Steve’s place. “Umm ok? And why do I have to go along?”

“You get to nap at Harrington’s place and i get grab the stuff he borrowed from me.”

You looked out the window and chuckled “damn is it that obvious? Do i look that bad?” You tried to sound sarcastic.

Billy glanced down, noticing that you were back to anxiously bouncing your leg again Unfortunately yeah” you felt a hand press down on your knee causing you to jump as u gave billy a panicked look. He raised his hand to back off and huffed “easy with the leg thing, it shakes the whole car, and yeah i know you tend to sneak off to his place to nap anyway..” his brows where knit with concern “you sure your good..? Look i can stop and get you something or..” “no im ok” you cut him off and turned your gaze back to the window.

The curly haired blonde took a deep breath and drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, trying not to get angry with your short attitude. He bit his lip for a moment thinking of something to say to bring you back to your normal self. You definitely have seemed off for about a week now, and dustin had mentioned something of importance a few days before? But what exactly was it? Was it maybe needing a regression day?

“Y/n…doll, when was the last time you, ya know..?”

He shifted in his seat following a short pause

“Uhh? U wanna finish that thought or what?” You glanced back, looking irritated and exhausted.

He took a deep breath and softened his tone “when was the last time you were small?”

The car fell silent and You simply shrugged and mumbled. “Hell idk few weeks maybe? Why exactly does that matter to you?”

He knew where this was heading, the inevitable “push back”. But he still wanted to give it a shot since both main caregivers would be at work for several more hrs and you clearly needed some TLC.

He pulled into Steve’s driveway and killed the engine. Billy tried to keep his tone nonchalant to avoid making it feel weird and looked at you from the rear view mirror “i mean i dunno ..Just seems like you might need it?”

“I dont need shit from you” you mumble, as you got out and slammed the passenger door. Yep just as expected. Hargrove bit his lip again and stepped out behind you, as you grabbed the spare key the family kept hidden and stepped inside, practically collapsing face down on the familiar couch in the living room.

‘This is gonna suck’, billy thought.

Steve had already given him a heads up that gaining your trust wouldn’t be easy. It required a-lot of compassion and understanding, but Billy was determined to try. Plus It kinda got under his skin that even Nancy and Johnathan had talked about baby sitting moments. What exactly was it about all this that you have everyone wrapped around your finger?? How hard could it be? He’s taken care of some kids before.

Billy slipped upstairs to search for two things, 1. The cassette tapes he lent to Steve and 2. The baby bag. Steve had mentioned beforehand Having an essentials bag stashed away if anyone ever needed it, although the dumbass never actually told him WHERE it was though. Of course the idiot had it buried in the back of his closet. He pulled it out and went digging through everything the bag included:

☑️A blanket

☑️A couple over sized shirts, and pjs

☑️coloring books and crayons

☑️Baby lotion, powder and wiped

☑️A couple pacifiers

☑️A stuffed bunny

☑️A mix of baby bottles, sippy cups and cups with straws

☑️And a couple pullups

Billy did a bit of a double take of its contents, somewhat confused (and amused). He sat there for moment contemplating how to go about this, pushing his hair back and pacing for a moment before slinging the bag over his shoulder and going back downstairs for a cigarette. He looked over at Y/n still sprawled out face down on the couch. “You still alive little bunny?”

“Omg just leave me alone” you groaned. Billy sighed, “sorry doll but you’re stuck with me until steve gets off work” he called out from the kitchen and stepped outside to get quick smoke break in. Lightning the cigarette, and only taking a few puffs and pulled a few things from the bag, unsure of what you might actually need.

Blanket? Yes always

Stuffed animal? Yup

Sippy cups? Maybe?

Pacifiers? …Ive seen her nap with them in, but she probably wont take it willingly, but sure.. cant hurt.

He slid one into his pocket and somewhat anxiously took a couple of long drags on his cigarette before putting the rest out and slipping back inside. Doing his best to be as quiet as possible.

He took a deep breath and walked over to the living room, gently placing the bag on the floor and sat down crisscrossed in front of you. It was barely audible but he knew he could hear sniffling, he sighed again And reached out rubbing your head for a few moments. “Hey you need to try to sleep, look im gonna stay with you till steve gets home”

You didnt even bother look up, but shook your head.

“Billy im fine, just go home…please?”

He tried placing his hand under your chin in an attempt to get your attention. “Y/n, look at me?” His voice was soft but stern. You still refuse, trying to bury your face back. Anything to avoid eye contact.

Billy placed both hands around your cheeks, resulting in a whimper that almost made his heart drop. Your eyes still refusing to open, but a damp face and tear stains dont lie. He ran his thumbs along your cheeks trying to wipe away the new tears that were forming. “i know im the LAST person you want to deal with right now, but i also know you NEED this, im not judging you, i will never judge you for this. Do you understand?”You continued to fight his hold on your face, but the resistance was all for not. He was intent on getting through to you, in one way or another. “Y/n its fine” You took a deep breath Finally meeting his gaze, tearful (🩵💙💚🤎 colored eyes-)stared back. You whimpered again as a few more tears welled up. Again billy wiped them away and inhaled deeply, almost testing the water, he softened his tone “babe listen, im watching after you until your daddy gets home, but you HAVE to let me in ok?” Whimpering, again you shook your head trying to shake off billy’s hands, you could just feel the heat rising to your face. This felt like a cruel prank, billy would never!

“im not doing this today!!” You cried. With soft sobs making your breathing ragged

“Yes you are sweetheart, you’re exhausted and you need it now please just come here.”

He Finally let go of your face. While still sitting on the floor he opened up the bag next to him pulling out a few items. “Please little bunny, just let me help you get to sleep, look we’ve got some comfy clothes, your blanket, and i can grab you something to eat or drink while you change ok? Sound good?” His voice went from stern to pleading.

In horror You glanced at everything in the bag, damn it, thats why he brought me here!!!

“Jesus christ Billy you went through all my stuff?!” You shoved your face back into the couch pillows, as more hot, angry tears welled up, you just wanted to curl up and die.

Completely humiliated that all of your little stuff was sitting right in front of both of you. Billy stared you down for a few moments before pressing his forehead against yours “nuh-uh, enough, right now your under my care, so NONE of that, now go get changed,” he got up in huff and walked back towards the kitchen “and while youre at it, pick out a cup, im making sure you get a snack before your nap!”

“Ya Grouchy little shit” he mumbled the last part under his breath

In a daze and still softly crying You sat up. This couldn’t be happening right?

The former school bully actually trying to play babysitter right now?? And what was with his tone? What kind of fever dream was this? Hes never been this…gentle???

But damn it if he wasnt right.

You needed little time.

LIKR FUCK Wrong place wrong time,

….but You gave in.

Hesitantly you pulled up the duffle bag your momma and daddy kept hidden and dug out one of the oversized shirts, a soft pair of pj pants as well as one of the brightly colored sippy cups with a straw. You pushed yourself up off the couch and paused for a moment, nervously glancing at billy, whose back was now turned towards you and placed the cup on the counter before going to the bathroom to change. ‘For the love of god Steve better get back asap’

Billy scrounged around steve’s kitchen trying to find something simple to make. Finally settling on a pb & j (sweet boy has no cooking skills, bless him). He looked over at the cup you’d set on the counter and grinned pressing his tongue to his cheek, of course you picked one with a straw. Although he would have been happy to try to give you a bottle. Maybe a bit embarrassing for both of you but he’d do it. Billy thought as he filled cup with apple juice from the fridge.

Oh shit, i should probably turn on the tv too while im at it.

Going back to the living room he laid a blanket on and the floor in front of the tv and switched it on. He flipped through a few channels leaving it on some kids show (insert any old 80’s kids show) He looked around somewhat proud of his baby sitting skills and grabbed the plate and sippy cup gently setting it on the floor. A few minutes later you shyly peeked around the corner still trying to wipe away some tears.

Hargrove tried his best to sound sincere “hey kiddo, made you a p&j and got some juice, that sound good?” You wouldn’t meet his gaze, but just shrugged, your face felt hot and more tears threatened to fall. Just feeling ashamed and utterly embarrassed.

“Ok Angel c’mere” the pretty blonde made his way over to you and scooped you up causing you to squeak in surprise.

He chuckled and sat you down on his lap a few feet away from the tv. He could feel how shaky you were.

“Can u at least try to eat for me? Its not like it’s poisoned” He picked up the plate and set it on your lap.

You just looked at it for a moment. Seemingly dazed, then shook your head, you could feel billy exhale in frustration or maybe it was concern but he tried again. “Kay, how about i take half and you take the other?”

You didnt say anything but simply took the half closest to you and tried your best to munch on it. Billy on the other hand quickly downed his half and tried to think of some way to get you a bit more calm. He was more used to doing …umm things a bit more adult rated?? so in a slight panic his best effort was to comb his fingers through your hair. Surely that would be ok, Girls like that stuff right?? If that didn’t work maybe rocking would help??

He lucked out, it didnt take but a few minutes before he could feel you press the back of your head against his hands. he grinned, “ooh? You like head scratches huh?” He cooed

There was a soft whine in response, as he kept going, and he could feel slowly you sink against him. He bit his lip and tried not to smile this normally wasnt his thing, but you’re oddly adorable in this state.

“Ok cutie, ya feelin any better?” He murmured while still running a hand down the back of your head.

You shrugged and grabbed the sippy cup sitting next you, and billy took the opportunity to move the plate off your lap when he felt something his hand. More tears? Had you really been silently crying this whole time?

He looked down, your eyes were still red, and tears were silhouetted in the light of the tv. He took the sleeve of his shirt and tried wiping your face, which only resulted in a soft whimper and you stubbornly trying to turn your head away. It was all billy could do to keep from laughing. You really were being an overly tired toddler trying to fight sleep huh? “Sweetheart” he cooed “im just trying to clean your face, can you sit still for bubby?” With eyes clamped shut and Still whimpering you try your best to comply. He did his best to dry your face, but your eyes and cheeks looked still looked so red. He looked at you for a moment, sighed and reached over. Grabbing the duffle bag still sitting on the floor he pulled out a stuffed rabbit and a blanket. Billy practically threw the blanket over his shoulder and picked you up with the bunny still in the other. “Alright cotton tail, plan B, i know ive seen your daddy do this a few times” he gently toted you over to the recliner in the corner of the room. Sitting you both down.

You didnt even fight him at this point, only more soft whimpers of protest remained as you pressed your face into his neck. He wrapped the blanket over your shoulders and offered you the stuffed bunny tucking it under your arm. Billy tried softly rocking the both of you, he had seen Steve do this on 2 occasions, (not that you would know though since you had already been KO’d for awhile and He’d be lying if he ever said he wasnt jealous of steve for it either.)

Your eyes were tired but they still refused to shut, and you softly whined again as You turned your gaze back to the tv.

Even in this state with Soft whimpering And sniffles it was all he could do to not smile. Billy rested his chin on your head and tried shushing you while rubbing your back. How are you still fighting sleep? The soft smell of baby powder wafting from your blanket would probably be enough to lull even him to sleep on a normal day. Surely its comforting scent should be doing the same for you? Wait, Billy mentally slapped himself, duh he did put a pacifier in his pocket earlier. He gently shifted you to one side and he tried to fish it out of his pocket. “Shhhhh sweetheart, here would this help?” He opened up his hand to let you take it. You feebly took it but instead of putting it in your mouth you played with it between your fingers. “Too shy? Go figure” billy thought to himself.

He took it from your fidgety hands “no baby, open up” there wasn’t even a sound of protest you simply opened your mouth just big enough for him to pop it in. “Oh good girl” he whispered and kissed your forehead, causing you to press your face back against him.

Billy chuckled and shifted you again so you were lying completely against his chest before going back to lazily rocking the both of you.

With both of you now fixated on the tv He watched out of the corner of his eye as the pacifier softly bobbled up and down, following the soft occasional suckling sounds. He grinned and pressed his chin against your head, inhaling the scent from your blanket that was still draped over your shoulders. This was blissful. He’d admit it, he could now understand how you had Harrington wrapped around your fingers.

As far as billy was concerned The horrors of Hawkins could fuck right off. At the moment the teen would do anything to make this last. He’d fight off anything if it ment you’d still be in his arms.

He closed his eyes for a bit but continued rocking you. He could tell your breathing had slowed,though there was still the occasional sniffling, but at least the pacifier has stopped the whining. “Shhhh little bunny, you need to sleep” he murmured and combed a strand of hair over your ear, gently stroking your cheek. Glancing back down at down at you with one eye open it looks like you finally may have crashed. Eyes closed, still softly suckling on the paci.

Fuuuck that’s adorable. Billy thought as he continued rocking. A few minutes passed until he was certain you were asleep. He finally decided it was safe enough to recline the chair back so both of you could get a nap in before steve got home.

——— later on————

Steves pov

“Oh no, no no no, what the fuck is HARGROVES car doing in my driveway??

Jesus Christ not again!!” He groaned as he pulled up to curb in front of his home.

He got out slamming the car door and mumbled under his breath the whole way to his front doorsteps.

“We talked about boundaries, but noooo of course none of that got into his thick skull” he muttered loudly as he opened the door. He was immediately met with loud shushing which caused him to jump.

“WHAT IN THE HE..”

“SHHHH!!”

He snapped his head towards the direction of noise only to see none other than billy hargrove with a finger to his lips and the other hand over your head.

Steve blinked in confusion then lowered his tone as he went into the living room “what happened!??” He whispered.

“Long story, but i took care of it” billy grinned sleepily. “Shes been out for about an hour n’ a half, but do you think you can take her, i gotta take a leak?”

Steve laughed as he carefully pried you off billy’s chest careful not to wake you.

There was a soft whine but you must have known it was steve since you buried your face in his neck and hummed “baba” in relief.

“Hi baby, daddy’s home” steve cooed

“And thank god cuz bubby has to pee”

billy chimed in as he finally got up off the recliner and booked it down the hall. Steve decided the best thing to do was get you upstairs and in bed before he questioned billy further.

He made his way up the stairs and into his bedroom, trying as gently as he could to lay you back down without (completely) waking you.

You let out a soft whine of protest before you were hushed again by a pacifier and the soft worn covers of your daddy’s bed caressing your body.

“Shhh baby, daddys here,” steve cooed as he laid down next to you, rubbing your back in hopes that you’ll drift off again.

Moments later there was a soft knock on the door. Steve glanced back to see billy pulling out a carton of cigarettes and mouthing “ill be outside” steve gave him a thumbs up and rolled back to attend to you. He waited until there was soft snoring before he rolled out of bed and crept back downstairs.

Meeting billy out by the backdoor, he crossed his arms. “Ok so what the hell happened exactly?”

Billy took a long drag and exhaled “she was in a mood and I handled it? Also next time it might help if you actually TELL ME where the emergency bag is.”

“Wait u went through my room?!”

“Not the first time Harrington.” He chuckled. “Besides your girl was exhausted and hadn’t been sleeping, so yeah, I stepped in, and handled it just fine”

“She fight you on it?”

“Eh not really,”

“Are u shitting me? She bit me the first couple times!”

“Guess ya wore her down for me, or she just likes me more” he flicked the cigarette butt and smirked at Steve before heading back inside.

“Yeah fat chance” Steve murmured following him.

“Just so you know, if you ever need me to watch her last min, i dont mind” billy said looking back over at the recliner he’d been stuck the last two hrs. Steve grinned following his gaze then glanced around the living room at the various contents of the diaper bag that had been thrown about. “Not that weird anymore huh?” He said crossing his arms

Billy grinned and just shrugged “Never said that..just seeing it differently now thats all”

[anittam]

ToT Theory: We Already Passed The Prologue, We Just Didn't Realized It

Hi, nerds! I been on a break from playing tears of themis, bc for a while it stopped being a game I enjoy playing and started feeling more and more like a chore, but recently I started playing again, so I think I will start posting again, so yeah.

Yesterday when I got home from work, instead of my brain helping me relax, it kept bombarded me with abstract and useless concepts, preventing me from sleeping, and just like that, this theory was born.

Warning: Crack theory (I meant it), and spoilers.

I have no clue of how long you been playing tot, but let me tell you something, early game tot fandom were fighting for the lives, because of the game's prologue, that shit was crypted (I not sure if I used this right) as fuck, for no good reason. Trust me when I say, people were losing iq points trying to get some sense out of this.

So many theories were made, some saying that vyn was the villian, rosa was a traitor or amnesiac, stuff like that, but what most theories had in common was that the prologue happend somewhere in the future of the game, that eventually we would do a full circle and go back to the begining of the game.

So here is my sleep deprivation theory on this subject, the prologue happended somewhere between the blossom chapter 4 and the first year anniversary.

Hear me out, at this point of the game I fully I believe that the dream sequence was really a dream, and not a trance vision. Rosa, our sweet sweet Rosa, just received love confessions from her four good male friends, and she doesnt know what to do, she is overthinking and overanalyzing trying to decide who she should chose, because she likes all four of them in a romantic way. She is thinking about it so much that she even started dreaming about it.

In the dream sequence, she sees the boys, Luke, Artem and Marius, and its connection with them, being represented by 3 objects.

If you paid attention to the blossom chapters, you would realize that thoses objects where thing that represents Rosa getting closer to them, by the way, all of those objects where introduce in the first blossom chapter (I think is because the writes just had a general ideia of the way the story would go so they just putted there in the beginning so they wouldnt have to think to much about them). The 3 objects were, luke's box, which is a central point to his personal story, a painting Marius gifted Rosa, and a bouquet Artem sended to Rosa (I know the flower is not the same, but the change is to represent Rosa's feelings at that moment).

These 3 things, although important in helping Rosa and the ones she loved build a strong relationship, it also brings her sorrow because of her indecision. Because she cant possibly love four people at the same time, thats insane, and cruel on them.

But anyway, after that she sees herself in vyn's office, and he say some weird shit, which phrase referring to one of the boys.

Luke: he talks about the chest of memories, rosa spent 8 years think about luke, what she did wrong, why he abandoned her, just for him to throw some bullshit excuse at her, in luke's first bithday card, Rosa say that she hated luke, but she cant stop loving him. But since he came back, she started to learn more and more about him, and his new life, and she is not exactly thrilled. When it come to she and Luke, there are trust issues, that are very hard to overlook, but they learn to work it out.

Marius: he talks how Rosa pretends to be okay and she is not, and that my friends is a recurring theme in their relationship. And not only her, but Marius is the same, they are constantly trying to not let the other know whats going on, they put on this facade of "im fine, dont worry" which just let the other more concerned. They have communication problems, but as the story they learn to be more open, and properly communicate their needs and concerns.

Artem: this part is the most used in "Rosa is a traitor" theories, because vyn talks about standing by your convictions but betraying your heart. And seeds of this happening was already presented in cannon storyline and in the Artem's personal story, in chapter 3 of the cannon story, Rosa strongly believes that the law is wrong, because if mother killed to save their child, they shouldnt be punished. And Artem's blossom chapter 2, Rosa wants to go against her clients wishes and push her to put her husband to trail for domestic abuse. In both scenerios, Rosa show herself to be a very closed mind person, and if she thinks somethinf is right, she would stand by it to the very end, what ends up causing friction between her and Artem. But in the end she give up her ideials, to do the "right thing", and that is her greatest conviction, doing what is right, she doesnt always agree, and sometimes she gets hurt in the process, but she done right nonetheless. Alternatively, it could also mean, think she has to choose one boy, even if she likes all four.

And after that she start feeling overwhelmed, she is in pain, and vyn makes her go to sleep again.

Now, what about vyn? What is his part in all of this? Since they barely touched on the hypnosis subject on the game, we could link this to one other moment in the game, in vyn's blossom chapter 4, Rosa witness vyn hypnotizing a pacient to help her realize that the one she loved was only using her, which left an impact on Rosa. Maybe her subconscious thought that such practice would help her decided which boy she should choose, but that didnt help her, just left her more confused.

And then she woke up. Without having her response, and still not knowing who to pick.

And this is my theory.

[valyrfia]

no actually ur so right. as someone who have been in primarily mlm fandom spaces as an afab person the rampant feminization that goes on with charles especially is crazy. ive been pretty public on my dislike of this characterization if charles because of like exactly what you said (which is excluding my own experience being feminized and treated poorly because of my more masculine gender expression). it makes me pretty uncomfortable to see this in specifically fandom spaces and incredibly uncomfortable so see outside if those places.

just to add, im not against feminization (i actually enjoy it a lot when its like niche kink stuff) but the way it is in formula 1 rpf is unlike anything else ive seen in other fandoms.

I agree, it is CRAZY to see how this has somehow become the default characterisation. I agree with your not being against feminisation as an entire concept and when done well it's fun but rather just....why does it seem to be the default? It's bizarre. On a note that I'm sure is entirely unrelated, someone pointed out to me the other day that (although a small valiant group of us are trying to change it) F/M genderbend is far more common than F/F genderbend in F1 RPF....I'm just going to leave that stat there and you can make your own conclusions but considering I got this anon when I posted only F/F Lestappen stuff for a couple of days like two months ago....

Yeah, it's a little disheartening and is part of the reason why I think I'm so anti the feminisation of Charles as a default characterisation. Fanfiction can be whatever you want it to be, but it has always been a queer space but I've seen it time and time again that when a queer ship becomes popular, people are more desperate to consume it within a hetnorm structure. I haven't just seen it with F1 RPF, there's been a big rise of this over the past half a decade or so which I think is due to the consumption of mlm content becoming widely accepted amongst gen z, but in a way that almost straightwashes queer relationships. I remember when RWRB came out and I watched it when I was home for a bit in the summer with a group of girls I knew from high school as part of an effort to be social, and it was so bizarre. Not only did I witness first hand them obsessively rewinding to watch the kiss and the sex scenes, while exclaiming "that's so hot", but they were obsessed with trying to guess which of them would top and which of them would bottom, and for me most damningly, I made a throwaway comment about Uma Thurman in a suit being very hot (tame compared to what they were saying) and I was met with silence and weird sideways looks or a retort of "Alex in a suit is so hot!". It was a little bit of a humbling experience, to see them root for LGBT acceptance for the hot characters on the screen but be blatantly uncomfortable by actual queer expression in their presence.

I'll be honest I've experienced similar things when I talk about F1, and I think that that's because F1 as a fandom space has really exploded in growth in the past couple of years and thus the newer mlm ships within it, especially the popular ones like Carlando and Lestappen, have been subject to this straightwashing more strongly than other older fandom spaces.

As you said I have zero issue with it when it's a conscious choice on the behalf of the creator, but when it becomes the 'norm' within fanon and people complain when roles are reversed, well, it really rubs me the wrong way. I'm interested to hear your continued thoughts if you have them!

[aspens-dragons]

can you tell us more about your job? or maybe the sanctuary in general?

oh for sure!! i dunno if ur asking for like job advice so im gonna try to be as objective for the first part of this!

i typically work 20 hours a week, 4 PM to 8 PM on mondays, wednesdays, and fridays, and from 1 PM to 9 PM on sundays, and i get paid 2895₽ an hour. i was referred to hideaway by mu dad (not the lawyer one) and my official job title is "veterinary assistant", and important things to note are that ive been with hideaway for over a year now, and i have a cpr certification, nursing assistant certificate, and i am currently enrolled in a pokemon emergency course at nar-uva. on this blog i mostly talk about a lotta the more lighthearted/silly parts of my job like c4 the torracat and all the clients but thats also like. definitely not the full picture.

as a vet assistant, i actually spend a lot of time inside; a lot of my stuff involves cleaning the exam rooms, taking samples of bodily fluids, sometimes i help with surgery prep, and i give medications and immunizations, as well as administering emergency first aid when necessary. outside of that, i also do other caretaking activities like helping with excerise and enrichment but that is typically a secondary task for me! up until recently though, i was in less of a tradition vet assist role b/c i was assigned to take care of one pokemon in particular and i was doing more general pokemon care but only for that pokemon. it was really fun honestly, a nice breath of fresh air; i was kinda nervous at first, i opted in for personal reasons i don't want to get into in this post and the pokemon in question was considered semi-slightly-dangerous, but honestly everything was pretty swell. i dont like that word im not saying it again.

as for more info on hideaway!

the sanctuary i work at is actually only one branch of an organization that has branches in every continent; this is the european one. there are a few asian ones (one in vijagha, one in johto, and one in hoenn), and i know unova has one too.

hideaway isn't really well known in terms of like the average joe knowing about us, but it's the kind of thing of if you're involved in conservation circles, you've almost definitely heard of us. we specialize in rehabilitation; a lot of the pokemon hideaway takes care of are victims of poachers, natural disasters, etc. hideaway also works semi-closely with a lotof governments, and our paldean branch specifically has even had paradox mons here (although i was too inexperienced at the time to handle them and even now tbh i refuse to get too close to a paradox mon.) the alola branch has taken care of ultra beasts which is. yeah no. im not transferring :(

anyway. we're also pretty involved in the community too and we also will take volunteers!! please volunteer we would love to have you!!!!!!

[smilesrobotlover]

Im going camping (again, ugh) so I might as well post this fic until then. It’s not apart of the main story but it’s Rusl and Uli meeting Kori! Fair warning, there’s some talk about premarital sex and the fear of people finding out about it including bein disowned and stuff, but that’s about it, so if that hits too close to home then look out.

Anyways Kori is a baby and I love the Ordon fam

Midna stayed for days, catching up with Link, explaining Kori’s situation more, and trying to ease Kori into his new situation. When she finally left, Link felt like he was thrown into a lake without learning how to swim. Although he accepted that he would take care of Kori when Midna was away, Link couldn’t help but feel intimidated by raising a child. He played with Ordon kids a lot, sure, but he never took care of them. If something happened the parents would be there. But this time, he was the parent.

Kori was just as scared and intimidated as he was though. He didn’t stop crying when Midna went back home for hours. Link tried hard to get him to eat but the boy just wanted his mother, so he’d sit at Link’s door and cry. After three days of this, Kori finally came around and ate the food Link would make for him, and soon he began to accept that his mom was away.

Link was already exhausted by the end of the week, trying to calm down Kori when he missed his mom, trying to balance coddling him and showing him tough love, but most of all his mental state was draining him. How would everyone in Ordon react to Kori? Should he tell them that he’s their son? How would Illia react to his son after he told her that he’s not interested in settling down?

How would his family react?

The people of Ordon looked down upon premarital sex, in fact, all of Hyrule shunned it. Link agreed with them no doubt, he never had a desire to have sex before marriage. It was a sacred act and should happen after he was married to someone. But his emotions got the better of him when he and Midna slept together that night. So if he introduced Kori as his son, everyone would know what he did, and that terrified him.

People who conceived before marriage were shunned and outcasted. Sons were disowned and daughters were labeled as whores, no good came from the consequences of that act. The thought of this happening to Link made him feel sick, and he was constantly anxious on what he should do, to the point where he could barely get out of bed.

He always wanted to be a part of a family, in fact, when he explored the temple of time, Rusl practically adopted him right then and there. They both expressed their feelings towards Link being adopted into Rusl’s family, and it was the happiest he’d felt in a long time. He finally had a family, and though it wasn’t blood related, it was good enough for him. But now… he was going to lose that. He’s been in the family for 2 years and he was going to lose everything.

So Link never left his home. He and Kori stayed inside where Kori would explore what little Link had. He knew he needed to leave his home eventually, they were slowly running out of the food he had stored away, and Kori staying inside wasn’t healthy for him, but he was too scared to face the villagers. He was too scared to lose his family.

Of course, Link couldn’t hide away forever with Rusl and Uli’s concern over their oldest child, and one day, Rusl entered his home, demanding to talk to Link.

Rusl’s face when he saw Kori said it all to Link. He knew who Kori was. Rusl was the only person besides Zelda who knew about Midna, he was the only one who knew about his journey. Rusl didn’t need an explanation that Kori was Link and Midna’s child. With all his anxieties building up, Link finally broke down sobbing.

“I’m sorry pa, I’m so sorry,” he said over and over again, expecting to get slapped, to get yelled at, to be disowned, or all three. But instead, Rusl knelt down beside him and rested a hand on his back.

“What’s his name?”

Link hiccuped and looked up, Rusl’s face wasn’t angry, or disgusted, but it was rather gentle as he stared at the curious Kori. Link was filled with confusion from his response, and it took a moment for him to comprehend the question and answer.

“H-his name is Kori.”

Kori looked from Link to Rusl and waved with a little “hi”. Rusl smiled and waved back.

“Kori this is m—“ Link stopped himself. Rusl was his pa, he always was, but it didn’t feel right to assume that he still was. “This is Rusl.”

“I’m his pa,” Rusl corrected, and Link looked up at him in surprise. Rusl looked back at him with a gentle smile, and wrapped his arm around him. “It seems I’m your grandpa Kori.”

Link looked from Rusl, then to Kori, shocked. What was Rusl doing? Kori looked at his grandpa confused, not understanding what a grandpa was, but he finally walked over to them shyly. Rusl smiled and went to ruffle his hair, but Kori drew back. Rusl’s hand hovered and Link saw him thinking. His hand slowly rested on Kori’s little head and the tension went away.

“I’m nice, Kori,” Rusl said softly and Kori smiled.

“Youw nice!” Kori repeated and Rusl chuckled, ruffling his hair. Kori giggled and they all sat in silence for a moment. Rusl frowned and gave Link a firm look. Link felt his heart skip a beat and he looked down.

“Rusl… I—“

“Link, what the hell happened?”

Link chewed on his lip with anxiety gnawing on his insides. He knew Rusl knew that Kori was his love child, he knew that his mother was Midna, but explaining the situation was still nerve wracking for him.

“Link,” Rusl repeated, firmly. Link let out a breath and fidgeted with his hands. He’s been bottling this up for years now, he might as well let it spill.

“Wh-when I killed Ganondorf I… was so relieved that it was all over,” he started, looking up at Rusl. He was staring at him intently, listening to every word. Link sighed and ignored his piercing gaze. “I was so relieved that Hyrule was safe, that the kids were safe, and that Midna was alive, and… we got carried away one night and… Rusl— pa, I’m so sorry about what we did I—“ he hiccuped again and rubbed his eyes, and Rusl tried to calm him down by rubbing his back. “I prayed nothing would come of it… I’m so ashamed.”

Rusl let out a sigh and gave his back a quick pat. He stood up silently and went to the door, making Link panic.

“Pa? Where are you going?”

“I’m going to get your ma, she needs to see this.”

“What?” Link sprung up and got to the door before Rusl did. “Pa please don’t tell her. She won’t forgive me.”

“Link,” Rusl rested his hands on his shoulder, staring right into his eyes, “Uli is a lot nicer than me, you got nothing to worry about.”

Link looked away from his gaze and Rusl’s grip tightened.

“I know my wife Link. She won’t be happy, but you’re still her boy, and you’re still mine.”

“I just… I can’t have her know—“

“Why?” Rusl’s voice raised, “because you’re scared? If you can fight the demon king Ganondorf himself then you can face your ma about this.”

“This is different pa!”

“No it’s not Link. Your life isn’t in danger here.”

“Yes it is!” Link started to yell and Kori drew back behind a chair. Link sighed and gave Kori an apologetic look. “I’m sorry Kori… I’m sorry pa… I’m just—I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok Link,” Rusl wrapped his arms around his son and gave him a gentle squeeze. Link melted into the embrace and held onto his pa tightly.

“P-pa… you guys are my life… I was afraid that if you found out about what I did then you would disown me and—“ Link sobbed and buried his face in Rusl’s neck. “I would’ve lost my life then…”

Rusl gave him another squeeze and held him there. He was silent, and Link knew he was thinking of something to say.

“My boy,” Rusl finally spoke up, so quiet Link wouldn’t have been able to hear him if he weren’t so close. “I could never disown you. When you came into our lives I knew it was a blessing from the goddesses themselves. I could never throw that blessing away.”

Link sniffled at the kind words, trying to get his emotions under control as Rusl rubbed his back. After a minute of sitting there, Rusl pulled back and gave him a stern look.

“I’m not proud of what you’ve done,” he said, and though Link knew it, the words still stung. “But you are my son, and I just want to help you get back on the right path so you and Kori can have a bright future.” Rusl smiled at Kori who was watching them curiously. “I’m not going to abandon you. And neither will your ma.”

Link gave a nod and Rusl patted his shoulder before reaching for the door.

“I’m gonna go get her, y’all stay put alright?”

Link knelt on the ground as Rusl left, every minute passing feeling like an hour. Kori felt the tension in the room and has been sitting silently as well, holding onto his goat plushie tightly. After Din knows how long, Rusl came in more gently with Uli behind him. Her face was stricken with worry and Link knew that Rusl told her about Kori. He didn’t know if she knew about Midna though.

Uli immediately looked at the child in the corner of the room, her motherly instincts going off as she wandered closer to Kori.

“Oh my,” she whispered, kneeling to his level, “you weren’t kidding when you said he wasn’t human.”

Kori stared at Uli for a long moment, confusion and curiosity on his little face. Uli smiled softly at him, before turning to look at Link, who was still on the ground. She stood up and crossed her arms, thinking of what to say to Link.

“Link,” she started, glancing at her husband for a moment, “I see you have a son.”

Link nodded quietly, staring hard at his hands. Uli stared at him for a moment and let out a sigh.

“He’s cute.”

Link smiled slightly and nodded again.

“What’s his name again?”

“Kori,” Rusl answered for Link.

“Kori,” she repeated. She looked over at Kori who was mesmerized by the third light dweller he’s ever seen. Uli kneeled down and got closer. “Hello sweetheart, I’m Uli, your grandma.”

Kori looked at Link, then at Rusl, then at Uli.

“G-gwamma?”

Uli giggled. “Yes, that’s me. And that’s your grandpa, can you say grandpa?”

Kori looked at Rusl who was staring at them both with so much love in his eyes. Link smiled at the two new grandparents talking to his son. Kori pointed at Rusl.

“Gwapa.”

Uli giggled again. “Yep. That’s us, grandma and grandpa.”

“Gwamma an’ gwapa.”

Uli clapped her hands gently. “That’s it! Good job!”

Kori smiled and waddled over to where Link was kneeling.

“Papa.”

Link’s mouth fell agape at the little boy by his side, his son. It was almost surreal being called papa, something he never thought he’d experience anytime soon. Rusl chuckled and gave Kori a pat.

“Midna raised a smart little boy. He speaks pretty well!”

“Yeah…” Link smiled at Kori, who was beaming at the praise. A heavy feeling settled in his stomach when he thought about the two years he never got to experience.

“Speaking of,” Uli stood up and walked over to them, looking rather nervous, “I… I want to meet his mother… I know her existence needs to be a secret but, she’s family now, right?”

“Ah—ma— no I don’t think that’ll be a good idea,” Link stood up and rushed to her side. “I’d love for you to meet her too but–”

“I’d like to meet the woman who had a kid with my son, Link,” Uli said firmly.

“I don’t know if she wants to show herself to you guys though! I mean Pa wasn’t supposed to know about her!”

Uli frowned and crossed her arms. “Well how come he got to know about her and I didn’t?”

“Darling,” Rusl wandered over to the two and wrapped an arm around his wife, “remember when I shot Link in the leg? Midna punched me in the face to protect him, I really wasn’t supposed to know.”

Uli gave Rusl a horrified look and Link sighed.

“There’s a lot to me that you don’t know about Ma,” Link said quietly. Uli sighed and pulled away from Rusl to get closer to Link.

“When is she coming back?” She asked.

“I don’t know, she said she’ll visit whenever she can.”

“Well, talk to her about it, ok? Tell her I want to meet her, I’ll have a nice dinner ready.”

Link smiled slightly. “Ok ma, I’ll talk to her about it.”

Uli smiled back and took a deep breath. “Ok, well, Link no offense but it’s depressing in here, so I’m going to take Kori outside, ok?”

“Wait bu–”

Rusl stopped Link as Uli offered her hand to Kori, who gingerly took it. Link watched as they went outside, every bad thought going through his mind. Will the sun hurt him? What if a villager comes by and sees him? What if a monster comes by? What if–

“He’ll be fine, Link. Staying inside isn’t good for him.”

Link let out a breath and nodded, still worried for his son. Rusl stared at him for a moment before cupping his cheeks and kissing his head.

“It’s gonna be ok son, you’re not alone anymore.”

Link leaned into the touch and rested his head against Rusl, calming down a bit as he was wrapped into a hug. After days of feeling nothing but anxiety, it felt nice. But he wasn’t out of the woods yet.

“Pa?”

“Yes?”

“Do you think ma will even like Midna?”

Rusl’s silence was the answer he got. He sighed and tucked his head into his neck.

“Hey now, Uli is very sweet. She expresses her love through her words… and Midna….”

Link lifted his head and gave Rusl a look, being met with defensive raised hands.

“Midna is very sarcastic! That’s all! She expresses her kindness through her actions, not so much her words and that might clash with your ma’s sweetness!”

Link rolled his eyes but understood where Rusl was coming from. Rusl gave him one more squeeze and tried to lighten the mood.

“Hey, meeting the in-laws isn’t easy, luckily she already met me, and I like Midna, so don’t stress out about it, ok?”

Link nodded and Rusl started to nudge him towards the door.

“Let’s go, you need to go outside too, you’re a little pale.”

Link smiled a bit and let Rusl nudge him out the door, where he recoiled from the bright light. He heard giggling and saw Uli playing with Kori. The boy seemed to be enjoying himself, though he was in the shade, the sun didn’t seem to be hurting him, and Link smiled at him. A heavy weight was lifted off his shoulders as he realized that his parents won’t abandon him over this, and that would make this whole thing significantly easier for him. Having the support of them there would hopefully give him a normal enough life.

“I’m sure Colin would love him,” Rusl interrupted his thoughts. Link turned to look at him and he was greeted with a smile. “He’s Rela’s age too right? He’ll have kids his age he can hang out with.”

“Yeah,” Link said softly, suddenly feeling exhausted. Rusl tilted his head at him and patted his shoulder.

“You should get some rest Link,” Rusl suggested. Link shook his head.

“I can’t leave Kori alone.”

“He’s not alone, me and Uli will take care of him. But it looks like you’ve had a rough few weeks.”

Link sighed and rested his head on his pa’s shoulder. Rusl chuckled and sat down with his feet hanging off Link’s porch. Link followed and watched his little boy run around the clearing, chasing bugs, pulling grass, and observing the scarecrow. He smiled slightly, and let himself drift off into much needed sleep.

[zukotheartist]

My last post on this (tho ill keep reblogging others' posts) but a few days ago I actually wanted to complain about this and then never did so ill do it now.

I unfollowed Noah a few weeks ago? On insta. And completly forgot that he also has tiktok and that i followed him there so one of his newer videos popped up on my page and it was smth like Eleven dancing in Fortnite and i checked the comments, hoping to see some palestenian flags🇵🇸 or anyone calling him out, but it was FILLED with support for him and "youre back baby🥺" "noah online era again!" "omg ily! Pls say hi to me🥺" and then i opened his full acc and noticed that That recent video was also more viewed and liked than some of his previous videos... all he had to do for so many people to switch up was... post a stupid fucking tiktok about Stranger Things... and just like that he was being idolised again, all it took...

Fucking pathetic and sad.

Love Will Byers all u want (he'll probably always be one of my alltime favourite characters too) but do not hide behind that to support Noah or Brett or Levy or whatever. Theyre awful human beings and they dont care about anyone but themselves. You can love the character and hate the actor. Fanarts and ao3 are free, you dont need to support ST. Pirate the show, make your own merch, only interact with free fanmade content. There's no need to show support for official Stranger Things stuff. Actually, take it a step further and boycott what the bds movement is asking to boycott!

These are the main ones!

But the people, on their own, also started these specific boycotts! (Starbucks too! I was obsessed with pumpkin spice latte but im never stepping foot inside a Starbucks again).

Again, the MAIN TARGETS are the ones inside the first box. The second and third box are about putting PRESSURE on them (ofc we cant boycott google but we Can put pressure) and the last box is the "the people started it on their own without the bds asking" boycotts! Disney and Starbucks (although both missing from the 4th box) are actually part of the "people started/led" boycotts too!

There are also people out there sharing FREE books (online) about Palestine! It's easy to look up but I can send you some if you don't find anything, I'm reading one myself.

There are also essays made by others that summarise specific books!

(Apparently this one also has a voiceover? Not sure bc I still havent checked it out but I saw Multiple people reccomend it and will hopefully get to it soon!)

Last thing: depending on where you live (im not from the US, nor live there, and that's the main genocide supporter) you can also call your representatives, send emails (you can find premade speeches) and go to protests! And most of all, you can share the videos from Palestine! By journalists such as Motaz, Bisam and Plestia.

[the-s1lly-corner]

ATTENTION CREEPYPASTA FANS

hiiiiii i kinda wanna write some hcs/self insert stuff but im kinda stumped on who and what to write; especially since its been a while since ive written for these characters (a while = about a month?? give or take)

so! i'll be opening requests for creepypasta characters, a 'short' run down of my rules below + characters i write for + some info regarding how i write certain characters that may or may not be important

i apologize for any typos and mistakes for this post, im back to writing on my silly computer!! formatting may be a little whack as well, but that parts more so because idk how i wanna structure these side posts

it should be said right now that the way i write these characters leans very heavy on my own personal interpretation/au rather than ideas that the bulk of the fandom has (although, to be fair, i havent interacted much with the current state of the fandom, im kinda stuck in 2016 </3) so personalities or worldbuilding/common ideas may be different or totally absent in my writing

will not write;

this blog does not allow explicit nsfw material, at most there will be suggestive jokes or themes but it will likely never ever be the main theme of the post!

basic nono criteria, no gross stuff

personally i dont like writing prompts surrounded by cheating so most likely i wont write it

anything overly graphic (gorey), yes i understand that this is creepypasta but there are some things that i just simply wont write; however implied/minor gore is allowed to an extent

really asides from that im mostly chill with anything, but on the off chance you send in something that makes me uncomfy/a request i feel i cant fulfill, i will do my best to communicate that

ohoh also! unfortunately i do not take oc requests :(! no hate to oc x canon, esp since im part of that community, but i just dont trust myself to be able to do justice or your oc TToTT

if i turn down a request it is nothing against you or your wants, please do not take it personally ^^;

will write;

fluff and angst, along with specific scenarios! im fine with most angst but as said above, if a prompt cannot be done i will communicate that!

the reader by default is GN/is not referred to with pronouns outside of like. they/you/your, the POV i write in is kinda inconsistent tbh ,, but i am comfy with writing for specific genders + trans readers, although i admit im not sure how much pronouns or gendered things will come into play unless gender is the main point of the request

im fine with poly! though ive yet to actually. write poly

i dont just write romantic hcs! im down with platonic/familial ones as well!

again im not at all picky with things, and once again, i will communicate if something cant be done

added thing since im not sure where else to put it! by default i write short hcs and scenarios, short fics being very rare on this acc since im not confident in my writing; so !! yeah!! there isnt a real limit to how many characters you can ask for per request but it should be noted that the more characters there are, the shorter each section will likely be

list of characters i will write for!

if a character has a * by their name there will be added notes on how i write for them/special rules stated after the list

Slenderman

Trenderman

Splendorman

Masky/Tim*

Hoodie/Brian*

Laughing Jack

Eyeless Jack

Ticci Toby**

Jeff*

Jane*

Ben*

Nina*

Puppeteer*

Bloody Painter*

Zalgo*(?)

added character notes:

for characters that are minors in their source (jeff, jane, ben, and toby and nina) i will not be writing any romantic hcs; thats just a personal boundary of mine and while i dont think its particually gross or problematic depending on context, its not something i myself feel comfortable writing for! however i am more than willing to write platonic or family hcs for the characters stated above!

onto the proxies! im still figuring out how i wanna write them but i wanted to blend together the creepypasta take and the og marble hornets version into something new (mostly for my au) however due to my brain forgetting most the stuff that happens in MH (i gotta rewatch it, bad) it more so leans into the creepypasta take of these characters! i also by default write tim and masky as different characters, and the same for brian !!

main reason for puppeteer and bloody painter having the star is because im not too well versed in their lore but im willing to write them! though i am struggling to find a consistent source on helens age so ill be going off the fandom wiki (with a grain of salt) that hes in his 20s-

zalgo is a weird case because in my au he does indeed exist but also isnt?? okay so hes more so this untouchable being/mostly nontangible; like the dude is more so like a sentient force of nature bordering on something incomprehensible rather than being a person; more of a concept if anything... but because i want a challenge, and because i need to flesh him out in general im making him an available character!

but yeah i think thats mostly it! this post ended up being longer than i intended but i fully blame that on me being totally incapable of shortening things down 😭😭

[exiledelle]

(this might end up being a long post, sorry about that)

been seeing some posts (mainly on twitter but i dont like to post there) about creating new fangames for the other human souls in undertale, inspired by undertale yellow, and im all for it.

honestly for years ive even thought about trying my hand at something like it, but unfortunately ive never been able to hold motivation long enough to actually learn how, so i dont have the skills to do anything. BUT, i DO have a rough concept:

going to put this after a cut though so people who dont want to read can just move on

OKAY SO. the big town in ruins. thats obviously something. its probably going to be explored by one of the other soul fangames eventually anyway, heck, ts!underswap already goes into it, but in fairness ts!underswap is a whole au, so its technically not the same. but theres a specific thought im having in mind regarding it:

so the cyan souls stuff, the ribbon and toy knife, is found in the ruins. of course this doesnt exactly mean thats as far as they got, maybe they simply left them behind, replaced them with something else, or they were given as a gift for someone who for some reason decided not to hold onto them anymore. but what if it WAS the furthest they got, or at least where they spent most of their time??

also obviously im not suggesting a hilariously short fangame that barely gets into anything. what i am thinking of though, is a story that twists and turns back and forth through the same area. you start in the ruins, and stay in the ruins for the majority of the game, maybe the humans content to just stay with toriel and wait instead of trying to leave and reach asgore immediately. but maybe theres something going on in the alleys of the ruined town that pushes them to explore it, discover sub-areas, possibly entirely new regions that connect to the ruins but are dead ends instead of leading into the greater underground. and the game just ends up with this one kid having a whole metroidvania mystery adventure or something, all still in the same style as undertale.

i dont have any ideas for mechanics, characters, what the story would even be, or what all the different areas could end up being, the most i can picture is maybe something to do with the scarlet tree toriel has, recontextualizing that into something, maybe you get to explore a part of ut yellows dark ruins that clover never sees, or maybe an area inspired by this unused track from undertale yellow thats either a not-underwater coral reef (think something like coral highlands from monster hunter world or that one area i forget the name of from tiny tinas wonderlands), or a region built over a massive lake, maybe its where waterfalls rivers end up (although thatd probably work way better if the story actually led further out from ruins, possibly a final area to parallel hotlands/core)

not sure. again, i dont have the skills to try making this myself, would love if i could and absolutely would try though, would be fun trying to flesh something out. as it stands right now though, thats about all ive got :p just thought itd be fun to try and toss this into the wind, even if nothing ever happens from it