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hopevalley · 3 years

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Season 8, Episode 5: What the Heart Wants

I was going to try to follow my scene-by-scene format for the entire season, but I’ve been getting a lot of migraines recently, presumably from staring at the computer too long, so I don’t want to spend all morning working on typing up the play-by-play for this episode.

Also, for what it’s worth I think this episode lends itself to plot discussion better than some of the previous episodes...at least in some sense.

And as another head’s up, it’s back to being critical for me. ;P

Storylines:

School Ends/Graduation/Parent-Teacher Conferences

The Dress Shop/Rachel

Postal Service, Ned

Bill’s Uniform, Nathan’s Vacation

Carson and Faith

Henry

Elizabeth and Lucas

Clara’s Dilemma

School Ends/Graduation/Parent-Teacher Conferences

This plot felt a little scattered, but for once it wasn’t the kind of storyline they foisted too much drama upon. After years of every single function possible being besieged by bullshittery, it’s a relief to see one go off without a real hitch.

The beginning scene with Robert hugging Elizabeth was sweet. I enjoyed the Canfields immensely and am intrigued by Angela’s role in the story long-term (PLEASE let her befriend Allie!). Nathan...eh, I have thoughts—but I’ll talk about that a bit soon. The actual ceremony was cute and kind of fun with the kids singing.

Neat Thing I Noticed:

Continuity? Cat Montgomery is still listed as Emily’s mother. ♥♥♥ I don’t know why but this made me really happy???

Complaint Corner:

Parent-teacher conferences should have been in this show from a much earlier point, and so should graduation have been. If there was a point to this celebration (the first year in a while anyone was old enough to graduate) that would have been a nice touch, too. It just managed to feel sliiiightly out of place.

I’ll forgive the “everyone in town goes to the graduation” thing because this is 1918...something like this would be a whole-town affair IMO. Invite everyone and have a nice get-together/party, probably on a Sunday afternoon after church but Hope Valley does whatever it wants, so...eh.

The threat of merging Hope Valley with other schools doesn’t fit in this scenario and it feels like they ripped it directly out of Tales from Avonlea which was almost rage-inducing to me.

Look, school mergers happened a lot in the early 1900s, especially around the WWI mark, but it wouldn’t be hitting a rural western town just yet. They don’t have any way of getting these kids to other towns for schooling. Where would the next closest school be? It would have to be pretty large and modern to merge multiple schools together.

*Adjusts nerd glasses* This felt forced and completely unnecessary. If anything this guy could be telling Elizabeth that they’re working on building a modern school somewhat close by, and could even have her involved in some decision-making regarding layout. Then they could bring in a “merger” storyline next season without it feeling out of place.

It mostly just felt dramatic for the hell of it, and it was boring, as was this man’s threat that Elizabeth had no right to teach a blind student. As if they’d accept Angela at a better school? As if her parents could afford top tier education for her? PLEASE.

Now it’s time for Nathan. The man chose to go fishing instead of to the parent-teacher conference? It makes him look like a tool. This isn’t about him or about Elizabeth; it’s about Allie. I understand why he didn’t want to go, but he should have done it anyway. It would have taken five minutes of his time.

His flippant attitude annoyed me because it went completely against his character as we know it, but Elizabeth’s lecturing was irritating, too. For a moment I thought we had Lorigail back on the show...

I think Elizabeth was well within her rights to warn Nathan about the effect his work has on his ward, but that inquiry took like a week AT MOST. Heck, let’s be generous and say TWO WEEKS. Allie’s concentration suffered for two weeks. There was no need to say more than, “Hey she worries about you and her work suffered for a bit during that time frame, just so you’re aware.”

I think what annoyed me about the math program thing is that...Elizabeth being a teacher would probably be VERY WELL AWARE that MOST of the parents to her students aren’t good enough at schooling to assist their kids with their homework. I dunno, it just feels out of place for her to tell Nathan that she wants to put Allie in an accelerated “program” and that Allie might need his help with her homework. It’s even more out of place when he admits he used to bribe his sister to do his work for him. Like. It’s very possible he’s not that good at math and isn’t capable of helping. (But maybe that will be a plot down the road...?)

“Or a tutor...” BITCH WHERE IS HE GONNA FIND A TUTOR IN THIS TOWN?! It’s super annoying to see dialogue like this that feels completely out of touch with the reality these people would be living in...lol. But also if she needs a tutor to stay caught up in an advanced program, she probably...shouldn’t be in the advanced program.

I don’t know how to feel about this whole thing here: “Nathan, you are Allie’s world. You’re the only father she’s ever known, and as she grows up you will always be the measure of the quality she’ll look for in a man as she chooses who to marry.”

On one hand, it does fit the situation (he seems to think everything is behind him but Elizabeth’s words are kind of a caution that 1) his actions still have an effect on Allie, and 2) every day he’s teaching her by example). On the other hand, it seems almost wildly inappropriate to bring up? At the same time, it’s probably not wrong that Allie will measure other men (friends, acquaintances, potential future romantic interests) against Nathan’s example.

I dunno. The conversation felt disjointed.

I think what they were going for was Nathan just feeling too awkward and weird about being with Elizabeth to want to be there for the conference, but...he interacted with her quite normally after the inquiry and stuff (even after she’d broken things off with him), so...it feels out of place. Like maybe this should have taken place right after the breakup and not weeks later?

Anyone else have thoughts on this and why it doesn’t feel quite right?

The Dress Shop/Rachel

This plot wasn’t what I would call a waste of time (rather, it’s worth having it mentioned now), but part of it was completely pointless and stupid. The whole Rachel getting lost thing was tacked into the promos to stir up drama, but nothing happened and there was nothing worrisome even going on. YAWN.

Rosemary’s desire to do something meaningful and different with her life is super interesting. I’m very curious to see what they decide to do with her if Dottie does sell the dress shop.

Also, Rosemary finding the book under Rachel’s bed was pretty funny.

But yeah, I didn’t really find much in this plotline to care deeply about. I guess I am pretty interested in knowing who might be purchasing the dress shop and/or if this decision is to bring someone else onto the show (a female love interest for the man who doesn’t win Elizabeth’s heart in the end, or even to bring back an old character*) or to take the dress shop out of the equation entirely... It’s also just as possible that Rosemary/Lee or Clara/Jesse end up buying it themselves down the line... Thoughts?

*I can’t begin to imagine who would be the best fit for this in this case, though. Who would have the money to buy her out?

Postal Service, Ned

Ned is just honestly so cute and fun. I love him. He’s really been doing well this season and seeing him wander around town delivering mail door to door was kind of nice.

Also, he’s one SMOOTH operator! Look at him, talking about putting a bell on the door so that he and Florence won’t be caught off-guard if they’re in the middle of...something.

Oh my, Ned. What might customers be...interrupting? :3

Continuity? Not only was the ulcer from last season brought up, but the horrid cabbage juice was, too. :’) It was a nice touch. And these two had just enough screentime to be kind of fun/interesting without also taking up too much time.

Bill’s Uniform, Nathan’s Vacation

Nathan got his vacation and Bill is in charge...again. This happens an awful lot. I wonder if it’ll actually impact the next few episodes or if it’s just here for the hell of it.

I love Bill a lot and I want to brag up his character in this episode a bit. I’ve complained many times in the past about him being written like a Grumpy Old Man Yelling at Clouds but this episode was super respectful. He got his scene with his uniform. Nobody interrupted it. There weren’t even any words. I quite liked it.

But it also felt kind of...pointless? I don’t want to judge it too harshly yet. Like the dress shop plotline, this could actually be going somewhere in the next couple of episodes.

Plus, unrelated to the uniform, it was nice to see Bill acting fatherly toward Clara. While it sort of came out of nowhere for the wedding, I appreciate the attempt at continuity there. Plus, so far this season, I’ve felt like Bill’s almost been a father-figure to Clara, Fiona, and even Nathan, so I’m enjoying that a lot.

Carson and Faith

CONTINUITY? The show finally remembered that not only is Carson actually a surgeon, but that was his original passion. It’s not that they completely forgot (S5 had him performing surgery on his sister-in-law, after all), but giving Carson a PASSION makes him a way more interesting character to me.

And also, finally, this feels like a REAL high-stakes plotline for him and for Faith.

I really liked Faith’s take on things. I know, I know, I’ve been rooting at them to break up, but the reason is mostly because they’re just so BORING together. I’d rather watch Henry twirl around in a chair for an hour than suffer through date scenes with these two.

It’s not that I’m against a doctor wife/husband team. I’m not. I just think Faith was a much more interesting and cool character on the show before Carson showed up and usurped her place (and completely overshadowed her for literal seasons). This plotline for Carson might actually be interesting. Like, a fellowship? For modern surgery? IN BALTIMORE?!

I hope this is Faith’s way of saying she wants a break and/or a break would be good for them. I can’t picture her leaving Hope Valley without any trained medical staff, let alone long enough for a fellowship...

But if this goes through, what will they do with it? Would they really write Carson off the show? To be perfectly honest with y’all, I’d be fine with that. At least it’s the type of write-off that makes a lot of good sense (unlike some of the other ones we got). I guess this is just another “wait and see” plotline which is uhh...the theme of this episode, huh? Anyone have thoughts on this?

Henry

Henry barely had any screentime, but I do want to say he is #relateable. The man is back at work for ten seconds and already exhausted. SAME.

Also, I appreciate that he’s ready to be back in the oil business. At what cost? I know people were worried they were gonna kill him off, and I really doubted it, but now I’m starting to wonder where they’re going with this exactly. Yet another wait and see moment LOL!

Elizabeth and Lucas

Some damn fine scenes for Lucas and Elizabeth in this episode. Mostly the scenic ones. :P

I enjoyed the agreement to a date. The horseback riding stuff was pretty cute.

Complaint corner? I don’t know. I have petty complaints. Even though the celebration for the kids was a town-wide event, and therefore Lucas was invited, it still felt out of place to see it brought up. Maybe it should have been mentioned as a town celebration from the start?

Then Lucas’s comment about not wanting to make things awkward for Nathan (who is actually a parent and there) makes a liiiittle more sense. I do think it was good of him to not go, even though he wanted to spend more time with Elizabeth, but it gave off a weird vibe, like, “Look at how good and wholesome Lucas is!” Is that intentional? I’m not...sure...?

For what it’s worth I already felt like Lucas was an honorable person in this regard. He loaned Nathan money, after all. Maybe he should have told Elizabeth he views Nathan as a friend and doesn’t want to hurt his feelings unnecessarily and/or if he was there he’d want to hog her all to himself or something cheesy. Hm.

My other complaints are:

Elizabeth running to the saloon would be WAY faster than all this getting set up at her house...?? Who thought this made sense?

Elizabeth’s dress looked like a nightie she bought at Kohls.

Too many damn candles.

Characters Do What Plot Dictates Even Though Plot Makes No Sense. More at 11:00!!

I have no further comments on the dress. It needed sleeves or something so it looked more like a dress and not like a nightgown/piece of lingerie.

I think the candles might have been on purpose to parallel Jack...but I hated it lol. Fire hazard? HAVEN’T ENOUGH THINGS IN TOWN BURNED DOWN/EXPLODED?!

I didn’t hate the date scene! But I never feel like Elizabeth has any meaningful conversations with Lucas and it’s starting to drive me batty.

Could we get uhhh something of substance please? It has to be surface-level nonsense on purpose. Right? RIGHT?

(And no, discussing a book for ten seconds on-screen is not “intelligent conversation” okay...?)

It’s really a shame because I’m starting to actually warm up to Lucas a little bit in this season but it feels like the conversations are just...kind of stilted and she’s not really into dating him—just agreeing to it because he’s the only option.

And I can’t believe I’m saying this, but...he deserves better than that.

Don’t get me wrong, by the way. If it’s part of the story and it’s revealed as such down the road, I’ll be fine with it...but I always worry they’ll just skip important relationship milestones and/or important conversations and expect us all to just accept it.

Kiiiiiind of looking forward to the rainy date scene in the next episode, though. I’m Team Nathan mostly but I’m keeping an open mind and I think I might actually enjoy it. Hopefully they’ll get some good scenes together that don’t feel like this one did.

Clara's Dilemma

Clara’s fears about running the salon without Fiona...are legit. LOL.

Also, this little bit was funny (between Mike and Jesse and Bill):

Anyway, if Clara was that worried about it, she should have just...told Fiona no? I hope it comes up down the road. Poor Molly??

I genuinely don’t know how I feel about Clara and Jesse’s involvement in this episode. I guess it was okay. I liked Clara’s scenes with Bill. I thought the idea of Clara and Jesse buying into the cafe was a nice one. Jesse having “invested” their money and lost it all, though... They did a similar plot with other people in what...Season 5 was it? Or was that the start of S6? He didn’t even say what he invested it in? But he admits the money is all gone?

I think that’s what was missing from that scene. “I invested it in X, hoping to make us more money, but it didn’t work out and we lost everything.”

I’m not going to criticize Jesse’s characterization, only because sometimes character "growth” doesn’t happen for the better of anyone involved. My biggest worry here is that it’ll be solved by the end of next episode....but I hope that’s not it.

Like, I think they did better with Frank and Abigail if we’re going to talk about a man who didn’t know how to live like he was in a committed relationship. It made more sense with Frank, too, being older and single most of his life. His bouts of selfishness felt realistic.

Jesse feels like he’s somehow getting worse and worse as a person as the show goes on. I’m kind of at a point where I hope he and Clara divorce, because he’s so damn selfish it’s embarrassing. He’s off having a beer while his wife works multiple jobs? And then he has the audacity to act like they should save money when he just blew all their savings?

I’m sure it’ll work out fine but I hope Clara puts herself in charge of the finances at the very least.

As to investing failures, I liked how they did that with Henry and Abigail. That was the kind of tension and worry that felt natural to me—like she trusted him with her money after he’d proven himself untrustworthy ten million times throughout the years, and he failed and had to uhh admit that.

Jesse straight up betrayed Clara. Which, if it’s dealt with in a satisfying way...I think can be a good plotline. I just worry about it actually being dealt with properly. That’s a huge stumbling block in a relationship. And why is he continually getting worse as a person? There doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to it.

Gasp... it’s almost like it’s just plot because they feel like they have to give someone something every damn episode.

Which brings me to THE FINAL

COMPLAINT CORNER (The Big Boy™ Complaints)

The show has really struggled with finding its footing. I wish they’d take notes from better shows with ensemble casts (cough cough Road to Avonlea cough) without also ripping off their storylines (cough school merges cough).

My #1 complaint at this point in Season 8 is the SHEER AMOUNT OF THINGS GOING ON EVERY EPISODE.

I want continuity, so I want to see things happen naturally over a season, but my God do we not need to have mindless pointless crap in the episode. Rachel getting “lost” for ten seconds wasted literal MINUTES of screen time that would have been MUCH better allocated to basically anyone else in this episode.

And I don’t think it would bother me so much if it wasn’t also shoved into the promo like it was supposed to matter. It didn’t matter. Nobody cares. Why was it allowed to stay in the episode alongside stuff like Clara and Bill’s conversation?

Or Lucas and Carson’s?

I think they want to appease all the fans in every episode by giving them scenes of their favorites, but what did Henry sitting in his chair accomplish in this episode? Rachel getting lost? Jack not sleeping well/missing his mom? The school superintendent?

Did Bill trying on his uniform have to be in this episode? Did Jesse and Clara’s problems have to come fully to light right now?

When every episode is formatted like this, with 10 plotlines all interconnected slightly and going on at the same time, I feel like...nobody gets the spotlight they deserve when they deserve it.

I cANNOT believe I’m saying this, but this plotline for Carson, especially if it will end with him leaving the show for a while or permanently should get the focus it deserves. But it won’t if we get tiny snips of it here and there and then BOOM decision made because Reasons.

And again, I know I’ve said before that I want more continuity throughout the season, but... the best way to do that is to tighten up the plots. Have fewer of them per season and give more screentime to the ones you choose to pursue.

Anyway, I’m still enjoying the season, but I hope they keep some of this kind of stuff in mind for next season. They don’t need plotlines for everyone in every episode. They need the plotlines they choose to write to be worth their screentime.

Sorry this was sloppily written and all that. Hopefully it makes sense. Very curious to see y’alls thoughts. Feel free to make your own posts and @ me, or reblog this or comment!

#when calls the heart #long post #season 8 spoilers #season 8 shenanigans #analysis and meta discussion #character studies and information

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player-1 · 4 years

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Anyone who’s been in the TMA fandom (or those who understand the bare minimum of the story) know damn well that whatever was going on with Michael D. Stortion and Gabriel/Worker-of-Clay was not just a simple Avatar/Entity partnership. No, in the twisted timeline of the Spiral itself, the Armageddon arms-race pales in comparison to the romantic tragedy subplot those two had long before Jon and Martin were in the picture.

(This is also going to be a long one, and with some MAG 101 spoilers, so buckle on in...)

Here’s what I mean:

Gabriel (or in this case, Gabe) works with Neil Lagorio (Web aligned special-effects dude) in the mid 1900′s on their first movie The Labyrinth of the Minotaur. Unfortunately for him, Gabe quits in 1972 just as the movie was released.

Not much is known of this time after 1972 up until the dreaded sculpting class in 2004. Speculation-wise, Gabriel might have been corrupted by the Flesh during his movie-making times or earlier before he came into contact with the Spiral.

Reasons: -The Spiral connects with the unraveling of reality, question one’s sanity and eventually “spiraling” into insanity. -The Flesh, in its literal sense, connects to the fear of people or animals being killed for meat; even the appearance of flesh/bone being twisted, bent, or butchered. But it can also connect on a emotional level, such as being viewed weaker than others, mostly relating to a person’s body image. That’s also the reason why the nature of his death is completely unlike the Spiral simply letting him fade out of reality. -Gabriel displays more Flesh-like qualities in his appearance and work up until the end of MAG 126. He doesn’t want people to judge him by appearance alone (even if his entire body is made up of clay) but he makes up for it with his unassuming personality and amazing talent. In a literal sense, he wants to mold himself into the kind of person that gets praised for his clay-making abilities, not just from his creations alone.

[Enter Ｔｈｅ　Ｄｉｓｔｏｒｔｉｏｎ: Stage Left] Of course, while there’s no evidence on how, when or why the Distortion would target him specifically, but there is one thing. Compared to all the other Spiral avatars and fear-aligned creatures, they all used to be humans in the past. The Spiral by nature is to cast aside their humanity and submit to the nature of insanity. But since most of the Spiral avatars either faded out of existence or just refused to do anything ritual-wise, how was it supposed to create a new world if all they ever do is destroy? It adopts an artist, of course. There’s nothing more chaotic than the struggles of a budding sculptor such as himself. But while that may be a convincing argument for the Spiral to get Gabriel to join the Dark Side, there could be more to convince him that it’s worth following the unknowable being of delusions. Long story short, there was no reason for Gabriel to judge himself so poorly if he knew how to reshape the world to how he sees fit. it would convince him that, like the archangel he’s named after, he could show the world the coming future; twisting the laws of reality so that there’s no room to judge how something should be right or wrong, imaginary or real. As if they were said from the Lord himself, Gabriel heard the Distortion’s tell him about a new world and finally found inspiration in them.

Then comes the sculpting class. It’s worth noting that, even with the angel symbolism for Michael and Gabriel, it could be implied that Gabriel is also a goody-two-shoes Christian boy who regularly attends church, as evidence of Michael having knowledge about Mass in MAG 20, assisting the Flesh in driving Father Edwin to cannibalism (so the Flesh and Spiral have an interesting partnership, huh?). Besides that, this is where Gabriel takes the spotlight. From Deborah’s point of view, he was a strange little man from the beginning; eyes always jutted out of his face, appearing right in someone’s personal space and disappearing just as fast, and of course, his works of clay. (Also a random headcanon just because: Gabriel may be afraid of water, either because his entire body being made of clay, and since you need water to help shape the material, he does not want to get it melded into his own flesh. Could also be the reason why he has short and greasy hair, cause he would practically melt into a puddle if he was unfortunate enough to get wet.) And apart from Deborah and her friends’ growing discomfort over Gabriel in general, he’s just vibing in the back of the class, trying to make a shape for the unknowable form of the Distortion. And the second Deborah inadvertently gives him a break from his artist’s block, he quite literally takes control of the class; switching over the biweekly schedule it was before into every week, and even manipulating the space of the classroom to further support his artistic needs.

“Ray told us the lesson was ‘faces.’ I put my hand up to say that sculpting faces was probably a bit advanced for where we were in the course, but he shook his head, and said that we were… a lot more talented than we thought. He said the key was that faces were twisted. All faces were twisted on the inside, and all you had to do was reach into the deepest part of yourself and put that twisted on the outside of the clay, and as soon as you can scream you’ll have your own face staring back at you.” (MAG 126)

This is also the key to the Spiral itself. With Gabriel’s assistance, he will be able to let the spiral to insanity move in reverse, create the physical manifestation of that fear instead of letting it collapse and destroy itself. And in that lesson as well, Gabriel finally creates a fitting image of the Distortion...A door, the physical entrance to insanity itself.

Then comes the final stretch in Sannikov Land, the nonexistent island that was said to exist between the years 2009 and 2011. And as Michael D. Stortion explains in MAG 101, was the perfect place for their ritual, The Great Twisting. After everything Gabriel had done to appease his good “friend”, The Distortion seemed extremely invested in the Worker of Clay at that point. Nevermind the fact that its telling Jon how its identity was stolen away from Michael Shelley by merging with the Distortion, but there’s more to this origin story.

“Michael was protective of the frail old woman he believed her to be. So… so delicate, so forgetful, yet gently wise. He cared for her. He trusted her. And she fed him to me. She made him to destroy our transcendence. And she did not hesitate.” “And it was me they sought to stop. Me and the others of It-Is-Not-What-It-Is. Our Great Twisting. The-Worker-of-Clay had laboured for decades on that contorted, impossible edifice of doors… and stairs… and falsehoods… and smiles. A thousand staring morsels stood, and not one of them believed themselves sane to look upon it. And in the centre, the door that would open to all the places that were never there, was me.“ “Perhaps I should have realised what was happening; seen those two lonely figures approaching me, but I cannot tell you the existential joys of truly… becoming. Of an entireness finally crossing the threshold into your self. So ecstatic was my completeness, I did not even hear my own door creak open.“ “Even sharper than the joy of becoming is the agony of being opened and remade. To have your who torn bloody from your what, and another crudely lashed into its place. To become Michael. And to do so at such a crucial point in our Twisting, in our becoming, well of course it destroyed it. The impossible altar collapsed. The-Worker-of-Clay tore out his veins to dissolve himself in crimson mud. The others of us were cast to all the places that aren’t; some have still not found their way out again...My very existence tied to my pointlessness. Wearing my failure as the very fabric of my being. Reduced once again to feeding on the unsuspecting and confused. That is who I am.“ (MAG 101)

Even if all of this was to explain how the Distortion became the being it is in the series, it’s easy to see how overjoyed it was during the ritual. All that the Spiral ever did was bring the sense of unreality and paranoia unto people for ages, only breaking down the mind until they eventually spiral into oblivion. It wanted to be something, it wanted to make something twisted and nonsensical from the world, to shape the world itself to the nature of insanity. And after all that time, no matter how many avatars it had in its control, Gabriel was the only one who began creating the ritual. Even if it was for an ulterior motive, The Distortion was pretty giddy as Gabriel worked for years on end to create the meaning of insanity; to create something that the Distortion saw as the perfect vessel for itself. And even as it was explaining it, with all these feelings of joy and ecstasy and very human thoughts and emotions, this was before it was forced to become Michael. So much for not being bound by human nature, huh? But it’s pretty ironic that, as the embodiment of delusions, insanity and lies, it never considered the idea of having an avatar that could make something out of that chaos. Even if the Distortion was explaining how Michael-not-Michael Shelley came into being, it also can be interpreted as Michael just yearning for his best Avatar so far. So instead of “I’m going to tell you my entire backstory.”, it’s more like “I’m going to tell you how a nosy old woman and her idiotic assistant ruined my chances to be with my Avatar of the Decade who may or may not be my boyfriend.”

In conclusion, Gabriel AKA The Worker of Clay AKA Igor with an art degree became the Hands of the Spiral because the nonbinary embodiment of delusion (who is also a door) gave a miserable struggling artist a shot of self-confidence (and a shot out of the Flesh’s control), eventually becoming its #1 Boyfriend Avatar of all time, and is the only person that would make the “hates gender and existence itself” Distortion yearn for years after his tragic death.

Takes notes people, this is what peak performance looks like.

#not kh #tma #the magnus archives #tma spoilers #tma michael #tma gabriel #tma michael shelley #gay shit #shitpost #rant post #text post

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sope-and-shine · 4 years

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Lamb & Wolf: Chapter 1

-> Jimin x Reader -> Utopia!AU // Angst -> 8.5k (I don’t remember writing 8k words, but apparently it happened) -> Summary: Death has been asleep for 1,000 years and is awoken from their slumber. Humanity has forgotten them, but they will not be forgotten. After the first death in the many years after their disappearance, Death has returned to make the world right again. In an attempt to keep Death from taking lives away, a group of individuals seek them out to stop their acts of injustice, but will they really stop death? -> Warnings: DEATH (Death will play a major role in this story, so please use caution!) // Angst // Grief // Loss

A/N: PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS FOR EVERY CHAPTER AS THEY WILL CHANGE. But also, I hope everyone enjoys! ✨

Long ago, when the world was still parted by continents and massive seas full of life and fauna, Fate was at peace. The world and all its inhabitants took their full cycles. Earth around the sun, flowers to their full bloom, and earth’s more opposable living creatures through their life to the end. The balance between Life and Death itself was well mastered and common within the universe. All of Life’s beings knew their time would eventually come to an end, and Death would almost always be welcomed with open arms like an old friend coming to see you for the last time.

However, not everyone was willing to accept Death for who they were. Of the countless creatures that accepted Death as a way of life, there were plenty more that feared Death and what they brought.

The end.

Many did not want to reach the end. They did not wish to meet their maker - if there was one, they did not want to see what was on the other side waiting for them. They feared knowing the truth behind the universe and the secrets of the afterlife. But all good stories come to an end, and Death understood that better than anyone. Death ensured that all those who passed, passed in peace. Death was no monster - despite the stories many had heard - and was understanding of the complexity of human emotions of loss.

For those who passed in unfortunate accidents, Death would lay with them and comfort them in their final minutes before passing. They would ensure the departing would not be alone in their final moments of pain and suffering, and even remove the pain as it became too unbearable. Or for those who passed in their sleep, Death would wake them gently at the shoulder and offer a kind hand to help them up and lead them through the light to pass on. Young children and babies were no stranger to Death, and were arguably the hardest deaths for Death to take away. The shock of one so new to Life already returning to begin again made Death ache just enough to feel uncomfortable as they collected the young soul. Death would sing to them, place a kiss against their forehead to lull them to sleep, and pull them into their arms and carry them through the light themselves. Death was no monster, and not to be feared.

But Death would not always be merciful. You cannot run away from your end, and when the time comes you will go. The angel of the end would rear its head and turn to a demon of terror, shedding the human exterior and unsheathing it’s claws to drag its victim to their final resting place. Death saw every creature as nothing other than what it truly was; a creature, a prize, an object to obtain and move on to the next. Humans and all creatures alike meant absolutely nothing to Death before their time came - especially when they ran from what was destined.

But the world hasn’t worked that way for over 1,000 years.

In the 21st century, a victim that suffered from severe hypothermia was the first of many to survive Death. They were followed by 4 bullet wound victims, 24 car accidents survivors, 7 deadly allergic reactions, and 1 plane crash. Each incident came from all over the world and they all should have ended in death with no chance of survival. The world was shocked at the discovery, and it became more relevant as scientists discovered the galaxy's cease of orbit around the sun. Planets in the solar system stopped moving, plants and animals - children especially - ceased their growth, gardens ceased their production. Anything meant to grow and age, suddenly stopped altogether. No one understood how or why it happened, but as years continued to pass and Death and growth ceased to exist, the world and its inhabitants began to adjust to the new world they were offered.

For the first ten years, church goers and ‘the-end-is-near’ advocates alike would chant and preach about their makers testing them, about the world soon ending all life as they knew it. Billboards, shops, the news, magazines, any surface visible to the human eye was covered in warnings to pray for forgiveness or to prepare for the worst, but the worst never came.

And neither did the end.

As humanity and all life as we know it remained stagnant, the Earth submerged itself into regression in ways that no one could have ever imagined. What started as a small increase in minor earthquakes turned into the moving of what was originally thought to be the end. Mass panic spread across the globes as the Earth’s land masses slowly began to shift closer and closer together. The once large continent of Pangea that had dispersed long ago had slowly reappeared as years passed with no hope of ever stopping, and with it came changes humanity never could have imagined. Rainforests with tropical climates that once prospered as dense forests with heavy rains and large brush merged into the vast plains of sand and wind, tropical storms now a complicated mix of rain and heavy winds filled with rough sand. Cold and snow inhabited areas were met with warm, sunny beaches and trees meant for climates of much higher degrees, creating pools of water that could cool you down and leave you frostbitten all the same.

Many large cities crumbled. Some left citizens drowned in debris, while others fell into the ocean before the super continent formed. Seaside towns were completely destroyed, along with the families that couldn’t get away fast enough. Neighborhoods were ruined, people were injured, healthcare facilities filled faster than workers could run them, and animals and families were left with nowhere to go. The world that once thought it knew everything and how to live was thrown into a new age of life.

The Age After Death.

137 years after Death had ceased to exist, humans had discovered a way to encourage their bodies and the ecosystems around them to continue to grow. Farmers were able to grow their fields, infants were able to continue to grow into adolescents and then into adults, and the peace that once blessed Earth was returned. From there, the world’s growth resumed and life continued on where it left off over 100 years prior.

Now, 1,000 years after The Cure that returned humanity to its origins, the world has settled into a new set of societal rules to accommodate the new era. STEM majors went into high demand when Death vanished from the Earth - as a cure was needed to live normally without Death - and once the world returned to a ‘normal’ state, STEM major demands only continued to grow as more disadvantages in the society arose. But with the amount of time they had to develop products and test them for accuracy, it wasn’t long until humans became exceptionally skilled in major math and sciences. But not every human was happy to sit in a lab all day, and with the world slowly becoming more and more populated, it was only a matter of time until unemployment skyrocketed to a peak. Classes that were normally 100-200 turned into classes of thousands that have been alive 17 years to over 100 years. Excavation sites that salvaged the damaged areas and the wounded from Pangea’s creation became construction areas to build more homes and jobs for the generation coming in, walls were built around the remaining cities and neighborhoods for protection from new threats, and personal vehicles were taken away to aide in the rehabilitation of Earth, overpopulation, and reducing inadequate part production. It was a long process, but the results were worth it.

There was large propaganda that surrounded jobs the government suddenly needed, like scientists, nurses, doctors, mathematicians, construction workers, and electricians. Anyone who could provide an essential service that would benefit the population was highly sought after. So, as a young and impressionable 8 year old, you became interested in the kind of help that was needed.

Every job flyer that arrived in your mailbox was taped to the wall next to your bed. With each new occupation that came in, you’d spend weeks with your parents learning about the different options you had to choose from. From construction to science, you learned everything you could about every job before crossing off the ones you just couldn’t understand. Of course, having over a hundred years to perfect these skills, you learned which jobs you really liked and which jobs would just be a backup plan for the future. And when the cure came and you were finally given the opportunity to grow up, you decided that nursing was the best option for you.

In a time where you’re unable to die, where you have no control over the growth of your body without the use of stimulation drugs, the internal and external health of others was no longer as simple as it used to be. No longer were doctors able to add stitches and send someone on their way, to just prescribe medicine and hope for the best, or to perform something as simple as open heart surgery and leave the patient to recover. In this world you live in, every operation and common cold alike is much more complex than they used to be.

Scientists determined in early cases of the cure that the body could only grow with additive hormones - most commonly known as Growth Stimulants - that were administered into the arm, leg, or buttocks. One shot every month of the year would trick the body into growing and continuing the growth process. So long as the shot is administered regularly, then a patient would be able to continue aging until they decided to end growth treatment. Of course, given the option to stay young, many inhabitants of the new world made the decision to stay young and in their prime versus growing old with chances of low mobility. However, this phenomenon of staying young forever and continuing to mess with the hands of Fate is what made your job so important.

Genetics were tricky to begin with. Add in the inability to die and a strong want for youth, and you create a cesspool of uncertainty in a world where you have nothing but time to play around. Of course, more hormones and new medicines known as ‘Regression Stimulants’ were made to assist in the reverse aging process. It was a long process trying to discover what old-age medicines would react drastically, but with trial and error progress was made. Still, the pain and suffering that came with these experiments and new age developments were drastic.

The loss of Death did not take away the ability to feel pain. Patients who come in with burns still feel them until relief can be given, someone who’s been shot with the purpose of death will still feel as if they’re on Death’s door until they’re helped, and patients who need a Body Regulation shot will still cough and become weaker and weaker until they can get it. So, being a nurse in this world was almost as important as being a scientist or mathematician.

Not to say the plus sides of your new home weren’t reward enough. They definitely were! The ability to stay young, to only have children when you decided you were ready for them even with an active sex life, to explore all of your options before settling down. You could drink nothing but alcohol for a week and not worry about liver failure due to the added precautions in the Body Regulation shots! A life full of freedom is the one you lived in, and with what you could remember about the old world, you’d never want to go back to that.

* * *

Walking down the hall of the 4th floor - the one reserved for patients with damaged organs - you push a cart with alcohol wipes, cotton pads, two vials of clear liquid, and a syringe in front of you. It was medicine time for many patients, and this particular patient was your most important stop of the day.

The door to his room is already open, so you push the cart in first and smile, “Hansol, I’ve brought your medicines.”

The hospital room isn’t as bright as most of the rooms on his floor, currently having a machine to project images to the ceiling to the left of the bed. The curtains on the far side of the room have been left open, letting in the city lights that light up the night sky and hide the real stars, and the TV placed across from where the bed is on the wall is turned off and left untouched. The only sound in the room comes from the machines by the bed and the man waiting to be attended to with a remote in his hand.

His eyes shift from the ceiling above him to you, a large, proud smile adorning his face. “Did you know that a cornflake once sold for $1,300? Fascinating.” His eyes shine with a childish wonder and you can’t help but to shake your own head in disbelief. Oh the company you decided to keep.

“You know, Bomi brought that in for you to watch movies. It’s purpose was not supposed to be for strange facts nobody cares about.” You flick the light on and pull your cart with you to his bedside, setting it out of your way so you can help your friend into a sitting position. He helps where he can, but his inconsistent blood flow hasn’t allowed for him to do much moving of his own. Waiting for open heart surgery to patch the hole in his heart seems to be taking a lot longer than it should

“This is ancient history from when we were younger, (Y/n)! Besides, what my wife doesn’t know won’t hurt me.” He insists with a smile.

“Oh, like streaking across a shooting range for a bet?” You ask. You take his right arm and pull it towards you, taking an alcohol wipe and cleaning the area to prep for his shot.

“(Y/n), they bought me chicken nuggets. What was I supposed to do? Say no?!” He argues. His expression holds what should be a regrettable amount of happiness and pride in what he had done, and you were far from amused by this. You cast him a side glare before squeezing his arm a bit more than you previously were, “Hold still.”

Just like every other day, you administer the two shots he’s required to have for organ and skin regeneration. You clean his arm up with some cotton and tape before patting it for good measure, earning a hiss from the playful man before you. “Well, someone’s in a mood. How long until your shift is over?”

“Another hour. I have a few more patients to visit before I’m done for today.” You explain, handing him a cup of water before cleaning up the mess you’d made on your cart.

He downs the water in his cup and hands it back to you, wiping his mouth with the collar of his hospital gown, “Hey, if you see Mrs. Yu from 3 doors down, can you remind her that my room is not hers?”

“Mrs. Yu can’t remember which room is hers, Hannie.” You remind him. It wasn’t like he didn’t know the poor woman was in a car accident, but the only thing Mrs. Yu talked about was the good old days of the Old World and how terrible the New Age was 600 years ago. It’s like the hit to the head cleared everything out except the things she hated and the almost healed laceration across her abdomen.

“And why is that, Doctor?” He asks, his voice laced in mock curiosity.

You sigh. Not the first time he’s asked you information you can’t tell him, nor was it the first time he referred to you as his doctor. If only you were allowed to hit your patients, you would do it. You’d have to wait for Bomi to come visit him on her day off again, “You know fully well that I can’t tell you anything, and we both know you don’t want me as your doctor.”

“What are you going to do? Kill me?” He teases.

“You wish.” You grab your cart and start for the door, turning back before you leave the room entirely, “I’m off, but move your arm around a bit, okay? It’ll keep it from going stiff.”

He nods, raising his right arm with a slight wince to wave you off, “See you tomorrow!”

Having someone close to you in the hospital isn’t always easy - especially when you’re the one to care for them everyday - but having someone that makes your day a little brighter when they know you’re in a constant state of sterilized sorrow. It wasn’t like he was going to die, but waiting alongside hundreds of others that had to wait to be healed by hand, you didn’t doubt it had to feel like dying. That’s what made your job much more special. Helping others when they need you the most is what you do best. Even as a child before death had become extinct, you’d always been inclined to helping those who needed you.

* * *

Arriving home after a long shift always felt more rewarding knowing that you’d helped someone get through another day. It made a quick shower feel like your own slice of heaven. Sure, you could do what others did to relax, like death simulators or high risk remedial therapy, but there was no thrill seeking adventure that could ease your long day like something as simple as a cold bed. It felt like the best massage the world could provide after 12 hours on the job. It was the only incentive you needed to let yourself fall back into the recess of your mind.

There’s something about letting your brain fall into a light sleep that just puts you at ease. The rush of swimming in and out of consciousness lulling you into a high better than that of any drugs you could find in the entirety of your hospital. A euphoric state where you can feel your body shut down and relax into a sea of darkness and silence.

Silence.

A blissful buzz of nothing that rings in your ears as you drift alone in your subconscious. It’s quiet, serene, and peaceful. You wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

“Can you hear me, Little Doves?” A soft, feminine voice permeates through the emptiness of your room. It pulls you from the sheets of your bed, making you sit up and look for it in the darkness of the night.

“What...?” It leaves your voice as a hoarse sigh, littered with confusion and sleep. The voice sounded so close to you, but there’s nothing there. Were you dreaming?

“You have their attention, Lamb.” Another voice calls, this one with a honeyed tone that pulls your attention to another area of your room.

“Is someone there?” You call. You look for movement, but there’s no one there. No one responds.

“We’ve been asleep for so long, I’ve forgotten how it feels, Wolf.” The modulated voice of the female says. How can she be so close yet so far? Where was she hiding? Who was she talking to? “Have they too forgotten how it feels?”

“We should remind them, Lamb.” The voice of the wolf insists.

‘Lamb...? Wolf?’ You wonder, ‘What kind of dream is this?’

“Remind them how darkness feels?” Lamb asks. You hear nothing in return from the wolf, no acknowledgment to her question.

You feel a cold chill rush over you and you pull your blankets back over your body, coercing yourself to lay down once more without much of a thought. This was a dream. A strange dream with no explanation and you just needed to move on to another.

In the back of your mind as you feel your dream sleep away, you can still hear the Lamb speak to you - or the wolf, “The world will remember us, dear Wolf. They will remember who is truly here to judge them.”

“They are so peaceful when they no longer suffer.”

* * *

An abrupt ringing pulls you from your slumber, the undeniable ring of your cell phone roaring for attention. It’s almost impossible not to groan when you open your eyes to find the light of day hasn’t even made it into the sky just yet, just a dark blue with a tinge of orange just making it through your blinds. You weren’t a grumpy morning person by any means, but the time on your homescreen just above the caller ID reading ‘6:27am’ was just too early for you. The beautiful face of your college roommate is what takes up your screen, a picture you had taken almost 400 years ago after she’d had her 5th baby with sweat covering her brow and a bittersweet smile from the euphoric pain she felt after birth. She’s worked in the same hospital as you ever since your first internship together, but as a radiology technician in favor of a nurse like yourself. She’s a first shift worker - unlike you who works the unfortunate second shift - and she never failed to forget that you did indeed get home and in bed by 2am every night. It didn’t help that her husband would sometimes specifically call for you to take care of him right before your shift ended. Taking care of her Hansol was no easy task when he tried to keep you hostage 2 minutes to your end of shift, and it was only a miracle that you didn’t have to go in for another 8 hours.

With a sigh, you answer the phone and turn on the speaker, “Hey, Bo-”

“(Y/n)!” You’re cut off by a panicked call of your name, “Oh my god...He’s dead! He’s dead! Hansol is dead!”

‘Dead?’ You think, ‘Impossible.’ Death was dead. No one had died in over 1,000 years, and it wasn’t going to just start again like nothing had ever happened. The idea was...ridiculous! No one died anymore, but the hysteria you could hear in her voice was all too convincing for her to be lying.

“-I got to work this morning an-and they told me to go with them and-” She takes a bated breath, “-oh my god, (Y/n), it’s the entire floor! It looks like the pictures of war time we saw in history books when we were younger and Hansol-”

“Bomi, you need to calm down!” You’re quick to cut her off. How were you expected to just believe that she was telling the truth? Death back again from- well, the dead? It wasn’t reasonable. Implausible! It didn’t make sense, and anything that doesn’t make sense has to have some easier explanation. “How do we know this isn’t just some weird effect of his condition? He could be revived still!”

“(Y/n)-” The way she says your name, so soft and delicate yet so sad and serious with a rough edge to it from the crying, it sends a shiver down your spine in dread. Fear of what she’s saying being true, “You need to turn on the TV.”

You hesitate, debating if leaving the comfort of your bed would really be the best option for you. If you stay in bed, you don’t run the risk of what evidence could be waiting for you on the screen in your living room. You wouldn’t have to face the problems of the world until later. However, if it were true, if everything that Bomi has said about the patients on your floor had really happened and Death was making its resurgence...then you wouldn’t be able to afford the blissful ignorance forever.

Ultimately, the need to know the truth took over, and your feet lead you to the couch you’d bought online only a week ago to replace your old one. You remember the excitement you felt directing the movers on where to put the new couch, the small pang of regret as you watched them take away the old one that held so many memories for you and your friends. Old lovers you’d brought home, godchildren you’d babysat, girl’s nights where you’d gotten deadass drunk and watched nothing but dramas were all embedded in your brain and a part of you that you were a little reluctant to let go of.

You had a nagging feeling that this would be a memory you’d want to forget.

Using the remote to turn on the TV, you’re immediately met with an emergency news report that had taken over your movie channel while you were asleep. Body cam coverage from an officer plays on the screen, a reporter talking over the actual footage as the officer chases after a suspect. You stare, frozen in your seat as he shoots the man nearly 30 ft away from him, watching the man he shot fall to the ground without any sign of him getting back up. However, in your world, blackouts with that type of injury is perfectly normal.

“Bomi, that wound isn’t fa-”

“Keep watching!”

“-and here we see a white smoke cover the man and disappear just as fast.” True to his word, the video on the screen replays 3 times, each time slower and slower to give the audience a clear view of the white mist that flashes on the screen and disappears. But it’s not just the body that’s left when the mist disappears. “And looking closely a blue mist is left behind before it vanishes completely!”

Somewhere in the back of your mind you can hear it again, the voice that called out to you the night before. ‘You’re cold, but you won’t be cold for long, little duck.’ Only the voice isn’t talking to you, nor does it seem like it acknowledges you, but someone else. You can see the blue mist, but the visual memory is too distorted to see anything but the blue ball of cold fire on top of white snow.

The camera returns to the studio, focusing on the anchors once again. The female anchor turns to her partner next to her, an expression of both fear and disbelief written across her face even if she doesn’t mean to show it. “What do you think we’re seeing, Donghyuck?”

The dark haired male in question takes a shaky breath, his mouth opening and closing as if he’s trying to find the right words to say. The papers in his hand are clutched with a tight grip, strong enough to leave his knuckles pale. It’s hard not to notice how worried and at loss the man is as the pause continues to drag on, especially as his move from the camera back to the papers in his hand as if he’s contemplating dropping it all. But despite whatever battle he’s struggling with in his mind, he pushes on, “I don’t want to alarm anyone, but this could be a sign from death itself saying it’s back. In fact, last night several reports of ominous whispers were heard from all over our reformed Pangea. Officials from the various sanctions hav-”

You drown the man on TV out, staring blankly at the screen in front of you as you try to recall the memory from before. ‘You’re cold now, but you won’t be cold for long, little duck?’ How could you not remember where it came from?

Of course, being a part of the new generation of children living in the New Age, you’d spent the first hundred years of your life living in the body of a child with no development until the cure came about. Memories were lost as naturally as they were made and that didn’t bother you. At least, it didn’t bother you until this moment when you needed it the most.

“I heard the whispers last night, but I thought it was a dream...” You mumble to yourself, forgetting about the phone next to your ear.

“I heard them too! How could I not have known? Hansol! He-” She pauses, “He was everything to me!” It breaks your heart to hear the pain in your friend’s voice, the break in her speech resembling the shattering of her own heart. No doubt she was in shock, you would be too if the love of your life was ripped out of your hands without being able to say a final goodbye.

But what could you do? What could anyone have done to stop this tragedy from happening? Bomi certainly wouldn’t have been able to do anything, and you doubt that anyone in Pangea could have done anything at all. “You couldn’t have known, Bo. How could anyone have possibly known?”

And no one could have. Who would have ever guessed that after 1,000 years of life with no Death or semblance of balance that Death would return and collect the souls of over 200,000 people in one night? All at once, so many lives were lost and it felt like the world had submerged into chaos once again like it had so many years ago. No one knew what to do that first day. Death was a rumor in today’s society, something you only studied in a history or psychology class. The older generation that parented and guided their children into the New Age when Death disappeared was the only age to truly remember Death and it’s toll on the world. They were witness to the negatives and the monstrosities that overrun the world before the New Age, and they were the only generation to be split in half over the disappearance.

There were many from the Old Age that revered Death, placing it on a pedestal and encouraging it to return to Earth and restore the balance that the world once had. However, there were just as many that celebrated their liberation from Fate. In fact, the Ambassador of your sanction led the charge for change when Death disappeared.

Ambassador Hyungjin Carrol. He was a humble, clumsy archeologist of the Old Age when you met him as a child. Your best friend’s father. He’d spent his life studying Ancient Greece and fallen dynasties until he had your best friend, Lina Carrol. He led the New Age into what it is today with the help of other Sanction Leaders from all over the continent. His face is one that puts everyone at ease, and it was thanks to him and his team of experts that anyone was able to age as they wished. They created the cure for the people and the modern medicines of today’s society that made the bodies of the people stronger. In times of trouble, he was the man everyone turned to, and today was a day that the world needed him most.

So, as he stands behind his podium only 4 days after the initial wave of Death flooded the world’s news outlets, it brings a mix of sadness and relief to those that stand in the crowd around you. The decor that was placed around City Hall Square matches the sea of blacks and greys that were once worn to funerals before the practice was ended. His family and his cabinet sit on chairs placed behind the podium, camera crews and media personnel are sat in the fourth and fifth rows behind the families of those lost in the Sanction’s capital city. Everyone present, whether they sat before him or stood almost a block away waited for his speech in hopes that it would bring them relief.

The Ambassador himself takes a moment to collect his thoughts, looking from the paper below him to the camera’s and his city’s people in front of him. “When Death first disappeared, I had a fear that it would come back. We watched our world fall apart at that time, and we rebuilt our society from the ground up after the destruction that destroyed our once great nations. We handed leadership to those that could truly lead our New Age into a better life, and we came out stronger than ever! And now, we’ve come back to a time that threatens our safety.”

The crowd remains silent, listening to his words as they reign over them. They listen carefully with patience and hope that their great beacon of light will give them words of wisdom and strength to push past this new threat to their way of life.

“As a father and a grandfather,” He continues, “It terrifies me to think about returning to those troubled times that once tore us apart. But as an ambassador to the people, I have confidence that we can overcome this tragedy once more! We’ve steeled our beliefs and our defenses, and I refuse to allow our people to suffer anymore than it has.” You join the crowd in applause as the crowd cheers and hollers their support and faith for the man that has led them so fiercely since the beginning.

“To my fellow citizens that have lost someone; a friend, a lover, a father, a mother, a brother, a sister, a role model...I apologize that we could not delay or stop this tragedy. If I knew how to bring them back, I assure you, I would in a heartbeat. Let us take a moment of silence for our fallen.” He motions for everyone to bow their heads in honor and memory of those they’ve lost, not even the sounds of babies crying or sobbing families still burdened with the loss of loved ones were heard. You could hear the breathing of the people around you, or even a pin drop if it were to happen.

“Thank you all for that beautiful display of affection.” He says, head raising for others to follow him. He returns to his speech, “I intend to send a task force of my choosing to send Death back to it’s slumber. Only this time, it’s slumber will last forever!”

It seems impossible to you, thinking back on your entire work floor being shut down to take care of the dead bodies that littered the hallways. The doctor’s couldn’t stop Death, so who could? But if it were possible, then you’d undoubtedly put your faith into him just as everyone else around you does.

“I encourage volunteers to join if they so choose to. I understand, however, if you do not wish to face Death, I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone. But I would like to commend my daughter and my son-in-law for taking charge and joining in this fight against Death.” You’re taken aback when he mentions his daughter. In over 1,000 years he’s only ever had the one child - your best friend - and there was no way she had actually agreed to do something as crazy as to face death itself.

Well, she was that crazy, but it did nothing to put your mind at ease now. Whatever peace and happiness you had just felt was squashed by the realization that your best friend was about to put her own life on the line. It shouldn’t be so surprising to you, but seeing her and her husband stand and step forward for Ambassador Carrol to recognize the made your heart hurt in ways you never thought it could. Something you’d been becoming accustomed to these past few days.

“Lina and Hoseok have always seen the best in the world! They’ve always felt the need to contribute to our society - especially the population -” His small innuendo makes the crowd cheer in joyous laughter for just a moment, bringing a small dose of happiness at the couple’s expense, “-and they’ve shown great courage in offering to join this task force I’ve put together in such a short time.”

“I believe we have nothing to worry about with brave individuals such as themselves for taking charge. Let us rejoice! To the new Pangea!” The crowd cheers with him as he celebrates a sad day in the honor of hope. He looks at his daughter and his son in confidence and pride, and it almost makes you forget about the pain in your chest with the news of their potential self sacrifice for humanity’s sake. However, that ache is still there, resting within you and festering into an emotion that you can’t even begin to explain.

* * *

“Were either of you going to tell me about this?” You ask.

After the ceremony had ended and the Ambassador and his family had expressed their grievances and sorrow to the families that had attended, you stayed behind to catch up with Lina and Hoseok. They had much explaining to do, and you weren’t going to leave their side until they told you what was going through their minds. So, now, here you were sitting on a lavish couch within the walls of City Hall with a cup of mediocre coffee in your hands as they both sat across from you with their own cups clad in their own array of black and grey.

“Eventually, but we were told to keep it under wraps until after the ceremony.” Hoseok explains.

You should have expected nothing less. Lina and Hoseok admired their Father a lot and they both showed him a great amount of respect. If you were in their shoes then you probably would have done the same, but the hurt of not knowing still stung. “Do you know how stupid this is?”

“Someone has to do something.” Lina says, taking a sip from her cup of tea, leaving a faint, pink stain along the rim. She was so calm and collected about it, as if she didn’t know that Death was back and wreaking havoc to the world’s population while she sat shoulder to shoulder with her husband of far too many years to count. You were in disbelief, “And it had to be you?!”

The two of you stare at one another, one set of thoughts muddled and confused while the other looks for understanding and reason. She had no business being so calm and level headed in your opinion, especially at a time like this where you could potentially lose her as a result of her actions. But to her, it was like it didn’t even matter. She just continues to search your eyes for an answer with a smile on her face.

“Dying used to be another part of life, remember? It’s a cycle, and if I’m a part of it to help the New Age, then I don’t see the problem.” She takes another content sip of her tea, still unbothered and unfazed by the situation at hand. Her blatant ignorance annoys you, and you can’t help but turn to her husband and your lifelong friend for help, “And you’re really okay with this?”

The man in question takes a moment, choosing his words carefully before he answers, “I know it’s not ideal, but it seems like a pretty worthy cause. There’s no guarantee that we’ll live or die on this mission but-” He moves his left hand to take Lina’s ring clad hand in his own, a blush dusting his cheeks as a smile of pure love and adoration stares at the ring he’d bought her almost 9 centuries ago. He brushes his thumb over the jewel, “I’d like to spend the rest of eternity with the ones I love if I have the chance.”

“Hobi…” Lina meets the eyes of her husband, a look of love and admiration of her own staring back at his. She places her forehead on his shoulder in an attempt to hide the blush rising to her cheeks. It still amazed you that even after all these years, they were still able to do that to each other. Two hopeless romantics finding love in the other and using it as their strength in the world. You admired them for it, especially in a world where love and marriage were rare to find. They’d always made it work, and they’re balance with one another was something you’d always wished to have. But right now is a time that you wished they could just throw it out the window for your sake.

Hoseok presses a light kiss to the top of his wife’s head and turns back to you, his smile now full of pride and confidence, “If she’s going to go with or without me, then I might as well go with her. Besides, if facing Death head on is what it takes, then why not go for it with everything we have?”

“(Y/n), I know you’re upset, but what do you want us to do?” Lina lifts her head, the blush having settled. “We can’t sit around and do nothing when there are millions of lives depending on this operation. We can’t run from Death forever.”

Hoseok nods in agreement, “And the death toll has only been getting higher and higher since the losses last week. If we wait too long then we’ll only lose more innocent lives.”

“I just don’t want to lose you guys.” You sigh. They were both way too optimistic to fight, especially when they’re together. You felt bad for their children, all 127 of them.

“Why don’t you come with us?” Hobi asks.

‘Why don’t I- what?!’ You think to yourself. Of all the crazy, stupid ideas that Hoseok has ever had in the 873 years that you’ve known him, this one had to take the cake.

“Hobi, that’s a great idea!” Lina cheers. She sets her cup down and stands from her couch, only to move around the coffee table that separates you two to take the seat next to you. She takes your hands in hers and she smiles at you with a look that just screams ‘please!’

“Come with us! Let’s take on Death together.”

Looking into her hazel eyes, seeing the determination that made her glow bright stirred something in you. Seeing the passion in her eyes as well as her husband's heart shaped smile was enough to convince you to join. They had a point after all. You could face Death and fight it to the end, or you could run away and pray that it never finds you.

At least, that’s what you repeated to yourself as you filed for an extended time off at a nurses station. You never signed up for Death with your work, and just standing in the open elevator on your work floor was enough to have you filling out your temporary leave forms as fast as you could. The atmosphere that was once only sterile and cold seemed to intensify tenfold with a strong, lingering cold that seemed to grab you. It felt like the hands of those begging to be saved that you couldn’t help were all tugging at your uniform, pleading for you to follow them back to what was once their room.

If Lina and Hoseok hadn’t already convinced you to join them, then this atmosphere alone would’ve made you sign up faster than the blink of an eye.

Of course, you weren’t the only one that felt it.

Halls were much emptier than usual, many of the nurses that usually worked the floor had either called off or put in a request to move to another floor. It wasn’t like there were many patients left on the floor that needed to be taken care of to begin with, but there were families and friends coming to collect the personal items of loved ones that were recently lost. Someone had to be there to supervise, and you were with the handful assigned to do the job.

Unfortunately, the coming and going of living people didn’t do anything for the dense atmosphere.

“Hey, (Y/n)...” The familiar voice draws your attention up, the Radiology Technician standing before you, “Bomi!” She looks tired, the harsh lighting of the hospital only enhancing the bags under her eyes from the lack of sleep she was probably getting. She’s wearing a hoodie you recognize as Hansol’s, an old university one he couldn’t part with. Her usually tame, black ponytail was exchanged for a curtain of greasy strands she was probably using to hide her puffy eyes. “I’m here to pick up Hansol’s things.”

“Right.” You grab the clipboard off the desk next to you and place it on the counter for her, handing her a pen as well, “Go ahead and sign in for me, okay?”

She nods, shifting her left hand out of the sleeve of her late husband’s hoodie to sign her name on the paper with all the other names of loved ones. You watch her, trying to imagine the pain she’s feeling. To lose someone you love in this world was already hard enough knowing they would find someone else to spend eternity with, that they could spend it in the arms of many others just like you without a care because you were replaceable. But there was no one to replace a love like that so easily. You could tell it pained her to even think about walking to his room alone as she continued to stand at the nurse’s station even after returning the clipboard to you.

“Do you want me to go with you?” You ask.

“Would you?” You can see it in her glossy eyes how broken she is and how thankful she is that you had offered to join her.

‘Is this the face of grief?’ You wonder. ‘Is this what the world was like when you were young and living in the Old World? How did the Old Generation deal with this pain? How did they do it so easily?’

Watching your friend step into the room of her deceased husband for the first time, you can’t help but feel the tension. The cold air that only seems to get colder the further you step into the room, carefully watching Bomi as she walks around and debates what to clean up first. She tried so hard to make him feel at home, and it’s something that Hansol was always grateful for, but now it only seemed to be in vain for her as all the objects she passes become painful, distant memories.

“You made living here feel a lot more like home, did you know that?” You ask. You don’t know why you do, but it seems right. Hansol was always happiest when he held something that she brought in just for him, and seeing her so sad with them...just looked wrong. You pick up a teddy bear at the end of the bed and smile at a memory of Hansol playing catch with a child patient that liked to visit him, “Hannie always liked to tease you when you were around to distract you from his injuries, but he’d always gloat to the doctor’s and anyone who would listen about how lucky he was to have you as a wife.”

Bomi takes the bear from your hands and sighs, “He never did like to be upfront with me, but-...I knew.” She pulls the bear tightly to her chest, “He didn’t have to say anything.”

“Did you know that a cornflake once sold for $1,300 old USD?” You ask, an attempt to lighten the mood just like Hansol would have done. Bomi lets out a small laugh mixed with a choked sob, one of the happiest sounds she’s made since you talked to her the morning that he passed. Her small dose of happiness only encourages you to join her, “I swear, I know the craziest things because of Hansol.”

“He loved to fill his head with useless facts. That’s the one trait I could never understand about him.” She admits. The tears that once only threatened to fall slowly slide down her cheeks, her smile turning to the frown she wore when she first arrived, “I never thought I would miss it.”

It’s strange to see a smile so strained, confused if it should be happy or sad. Even worse, it upsets you that this type of pain was an emotion that could be felt. Death was truly cruel if it could take an innocent life so freely. How could it take a soul that made others around him so happy away with thousands of others right alongside him? Who could do that? Why would they do that? It was disgusting.

It made you what you were going to do seem that much more worth it. Now, standing in this room, you can understand why Lina and Hoseok would willingly stand on the front lines for a better world. You truly understand it.

“Did you hear that Lina is on the task force to get rid of Death?” You ask. Bomi nods, wiping her tears. You reach out and grab one of her hands to pull her attention to you, “I’m going with her.”

“Why?” She asks.

You sigh, “This place doesn’t feel the same. It used to feel sad because patients were recovering slowly, but now there’s not even life to it. I can’t stand it!” In such a short amount of time, your life has changed completely. Your friends were in danger, your family was in danger, your job was in danger, the entire world was in danger and you had the ability to stop it. Why shouldn’t you try? “I’m going to face Death head on and take back what’s ours.”

“I wonder if Hannie would have done the same…” Bomi mutters. She lets out a soft chuckle, “He probably would have, knowing him.”

“You know, they’re accepting volunteers. Why don’t you come with us?” You ask.

She looks to you with an expression that must have matched the one you gave Hoseok when he asked you the same question the other day. You could see why both he and Lina seemed so amused now, “You want me to chase after Death?”

You nod, squeezing her hand and offering a smile, “We can do it together.”

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rosaguard · 4 years

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i’ll probably make a more official post about all this at a later date but i was talking to verumking about some stuff and since it was already something i wanted to talk about on my blog, i figured i would just post about it here as well. for starters, i don't really like the idea of minerva in crisis core - mostly b/c her existence raises questions the writers didn't seem to consider. for instance, if this being exists to protect the planet, why didn't the planet 'summon' her when sephiroth was running around and shanked aeris? i've been thinking of how i can make minerva not suck ( at least in my eyes ) and one idea is to just continue ignoring her completely while playing with the idea of aeris becoming something more™️ when she dies / enters the lifestream which has been floating in my head for awhile now.

i've seen people say they've made her overly special / powerful in the remake which is weird to me since 1). she was always special - being the last cetra was her big 'special' thing:tm: and 2). she was probably always meant to powerful but they couldn't fully explore it back in 1997. aeris' powers have been unclear in canon as far back as the OG - she can canonically enter cloud's subconscious and they take that ability even further in the remake - but we have no idea if that's a thing all cetra can just do or if she's even more powerful then the average cetra. for the sake of this discussion, i'm going to go with the latter. we already know she helped save the planet even in death; we just didn't know how until maiden that travels the planet ( which i'm constantly confused on whether is canon or not b/c cl.otis and clerit.hs are always arguing about it. apparently the ultmania it was in is getting reprinted so??? ).

anyway, MTTTP basically turns her saving the planet into this 'my friends are my power' thing and all the souls she meets in the novel such as jessie, biggs, wedge, zack, etc. + the other souls within the lifestream itself help push meteor back but i'm also like....what if she just willed it by herself completely? this is essentially a long lead up to me proposing the idea of her and the planet's subconsciousness basically merging together once she dies. i always felt like aeris ( and other characters ) were super active post-death in a way that doesn't really make sense. aeris can be explained as her being a cetra™️ ( but even then i feel like it’s kind of a reach since the cetra are so unexplored ) but zack should've merged with the lifestream by the time advent children happens and it doesn't make sense for him to appear to cloud - at least based on how the lifestream is described in the OG - unless aeris herself willed it so.

i’ve touched on how a lot of the themes regarding the lifestream and the cetra are very similar to many concepts in indian religions before on my blog. one thing i didn’t touch on, however, was how the philosophical concept of brahman reminds me of aeris’ character beyond death:

brahma (ब्रह्म), brahman (stem) means the concept of the transcendent and immanent ultimate reality, supreme cosmic spirit in hinduism.

brahman on the other hand cannot be seen with the naked eye. It can only be experienced. brahman is said to be all-pervasive. It pervades all parts of existence. it is present everywhere. sages of the past have experienced the Brahman and have become realized souls. according to advaita of sankara, all individual souls are parts of the supreme brahman. after getting liberation from the human bodies, the individual souls become one with the brahman. death is meant only for the body and not for the soul.

all of the souls in the lifestream make up one, large collective ( or 'soul' ) which is the planet's consciousness similar to brahman. the way brahman is described, or at least my understanding of it at least, is that it's not a 'physical' thing but something that is felt because it exists within everyone / everything and is present everywhere. this reminds me of not only of how bugenhagen describes the lifestream but also how aeris' presence post-death is handled as well.

bugenhagen: eventually... all humans die. what happens to them after they die? the body decomposes, and returns to the planet. that much everyone knows. what about their consciousness, their hearts and their souls? the soul too returns to the planet. and not only those of humans, but everything on this planet. in fact, all living things in the universe, are the same. the spirits that return to the planet, merge with one another and roam the planet. they roam, converge, and divide, becoming a swell, called the 'lifestream'. lifestream... in other words, a path of energy of the souls roaming the planet. 'spirit energy' is a word that you should never forget. a new life... children are blessed with spirit energy and are brought into the world. then, the time comes when they die and once again return to the planet... of course there are exceptions, but this is the way of the world.

aeris within the lifestream is the last shot you see in the original game ( not counting the post credits ) and instead of hints of her theme playing, the chimes for the lifestream theme plays instead as she smiles. she also helps saves cloud after his fight with sephiroth in the lifestream so aeris not merging with the lifestream and still looking out for the others was a thing even in the original game. in advent children, her presence is constantly 'felt' even though she is not there directly whether it’s tifa being able to feel her presence when it's raining, cloud being able to indirectly talk to her, or even marlene sensing her when sephiroth summons the infected lifestream.

tifa: aeris is here... everyone is here... cloud is here with us!

a lot of these moments are also specifically tied to nature ( or places she was tied to such as the church or her death site ): her leaving a voicemail on cloud’s phone when it’s dropped in water, her appearing in the flower fields in the credits as cloud is traveling the countryside, her showing up while the party is fighting bahamut in the sky, etc. sephiroth’s presence in the lifestream post-game would also work better as them being contrasting rivals because through geostigma, he would be hurting 'her' as she is the planet’s consciousness now. ( it could also explain why she was never like 'hey cloud, i have healing water under my church. go grab a shovel and get to digging fam!!!' because maybe she couldn't reach out to him or something. the real answer is bad writing and fan service but!!! )

overall, aeris becoming the ffivii equivalent of the supreme cosmic spirit is interesting™️ to me. her dying like in the OG isn’t a part of my main canon but the entire concept of this could still be a thing once she dies of old age in my main canon or used for another verse ( most likely the latter ). especially since she seems to just be able to...do things because she simply wills it after death - at least to an extent. for instance, cloud literally dies at the end of Advent Children and she simply went 'no, i don’t think you will' before sending him back to her church alive. she also talks to kadaj as he’s dying and joining the lifestream which again, doesn’t seem to be a general cetra thing but it’s hard to say. it always read to me as if ifalna had already fully merged with the lifestream when aeris was still a child and she couldn’t ‘talk’ to her mother anymore. yet aeris is able to physically manifest herself ( and zack ) outside of the lifestream to talk to cloud ( it was for fanservice:tm: but stuff like that raises questions SE!!!!! ).

tl;dr: she's basically a goddess after dying and keeps zack around because it gets kind of boring monitoring the flow of life sometimes.

#❀ . ━ ❛ blood of the ancients ❪ headcanon ❫ .#they play solitaire and stuff. it's fun:tm:

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howwelldoyouknowyourmoon · 4 years

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The merging of the teaching with powerful emotional experiences – Allen Tate Wood

Allen Tate Wood, author, lecturer and consultant on the cult phenomenon, interviewed at North Texas State University in the summer of 1985.

Tom Waldren: When would the prospective candidate first become aware that this was the Moonies, that this was a religious cult?

Allen Tate Wood: Well, they may never be aware. My wife was never aware. She said after ten days with the Moonies, ‘Thank God you lied to me in the beginning. If you hadn’t lied to me in the beginning I never would have joined.’ I worked with a boy in 1978 who was a freshman at Yale, and he had come out of the Moonies, and he had been in it for 30 days, he’d been in a Unification Church training center in Northern California for 30 days and he’d never heard the name Sun Myung Moon. He’d never heard reference to the Moonies. He was in the organization. He didn’t even know what the name of the organization was. He was told it was the Creative Community Project. But the environment of the cult training center is designed to overthrow you, to overwhelm you and the variables that are operating there are this control. It’s control of communication, control of movement, control of language. Ultimately the attempt to control your thinking.

So if you want to conceptualize what goes on in a training session you can think of it very simply like this—on the one hand is the presentation of the group’s teaching, its ideology. They’re slowly filtering that into you over a period of three days. In addition to that, you have the behavioral regime. The psychological manipulation; the emotional manipulation; the controls; the piercing and penetrating of your defenses; the subterfuge and the deception which is used to get you to give us information about you so that we can use that very information to pull you closer to us. At the very end, you’ve had a lot of powerful emotional experiences. You’ve felt really drawn to this group. You’ve felt like there’s something really positive happening here. We then want to connect up the result of the psychological control and manipulation with our ideology to make you believe that your powerful experiences are the result of the truth of our teaching.

Tom Waldren: So, in essence it’s a breakdown.

Allen Tate Wood: That’s right.

Tom Waldren: And then?

Allen Tate Wood: And then it’s the merging of the teaching with these powerful emotional experiences and in the end we tell you, what’s happened to you Tom is, you haven’t just had a good time, but when you were crying yesterday and you were feeling kind of ecstatic, and then when you were just crying with grief this morning, you were meeting God. God himself is speaking to you through our teaching, through its truth. And at the very end, we give you this existential experience of God himself, and also the devil. And that’s very hard to get around. And we say, throughout the course of the weekend Tom, part of you has been drawn to us. Part of you has felt that this is wonderful, something good is happening here. Another part of you has thought, ‘Hey, wait a second, what’s going on here? This is kind of dinky? This is kind of weird. Why are these people so happy? Why are they so positive?’ We then tell you, that critical part of you is a devil. That is Satan trying to break your connection to us. So you are now at the center of the stage of world history and God himself is calling you to join with him in his work of restoration. To fight the satanic history, to fight communism, to stand for God, truth, the family, justice, peace—you know all these good things. And all you have to do, is just stay for another three days. We have another three day workshop where we are going to go more deeply into the teaching. And what we do is we go more deeply into manipulating and controlling you, into manufacturing these experiences which are now convincing you that you are in the hands of God.

Tom Waldren: So there’s an answer for everything.

Allen Tate Wood: There’s an answer for everything, and we could produce the same experiences with a totally different teaching. The teaching is not the critical thing. The critical thing is the environmental, the emotional, the psychological, the human control that we exert over you through a whole series of steps which are designed to destroy your own self-control. To destroy your autonomy, and to make you feel you have fallen into the hands on an absolute power that is totally competent to manage you and to decide for you who and what you should be and what you should do.

Tom Waldren: There was widespread fear when this became known that this was going on, this type of brainwashing thing, I think mainly from the parents. Did you ever encounter parents coming after their kids?

Allen Tate Wood: Not when I was in the Unification Church, well once or twice. But afterwards, Yeah, I met many, many parents whose children had joined the Unification Church or similar organizations. And their situation is a very difficult one. It’s very difficult to bring aid to people who have joined totalist social systems. In the first place they don’t believe in dialog. And in the second place the teaching of the groups explicitly states that anybody that disagrees with the group is satanic. So the young person inside the group is effectively trapped inside. They don’t have access to alternative information; they don’t have access to alternative authorities who could help them understand what has happened to them. They’re like flies in amber.

Allen Tate Wood on the Unification Church 1. Interview at North Texas State University (Summer 1985) 2. Deconstructing Extremism in 21st Century America (c. 2014) 3. Interview with Walter Evans in the Texas Metroplex (1985) 4. Moonstruck: A memoir of my life in a cult . – Allen Tate Wood with Jack Vitek (1979)

Note: This video transcript has been slightly edited to improve readability.

____________________________________

There are technical issues preventing the preparation and editing of new posts on HWDYKYM.

Enjoy the HWDYKYM archive HERE

____________________________________

There are additional resources here:

The Tragedy of the Six Marys website

Structure of the website:

There are six main menus and various submenus:

1. Book Content: The Tragedy of the Six Marys (9 pages)

2. Magazines Moon’s first wife; Japanese wife who killed Korean husband; Moon used a ‘Honey Trap’; Pikareum emerged at Ewha Womans University; Suicide of Moon money mule in Uruguay; Sam Park and his mother – Fall of the House of Moon; Jane Day Mook (US) & Hiroshi Yamaguchi (Japan) investigate. (10 pages)

3. Moon’s Theology, including Moon’s pikareum sex theology (5 items) Shamanism at the heart of the org. (See also Soon-ae Hong) (5 items) (Theology has 20 pages).

4. Investigations: Emperor of the Universe documentary; Moon’s six wives; Politics and Religion; US government investigations; Moon church human trafficking; Moon’s activities in Central and South America. (12 pages)

5. Testimonies, including “Ashamed to be Korean” Sam Park (one of Sun Myung Moon’s secret sons) page in German; Nansook Hong, (Her book is available in German); Japanese woman recruited and sold; Allen Tate Wood; Writings of former Moon church members (Index with links) Boonville submenu. Moonwebs book; Ford Greene and other Oakland recruits; Boonville history (10 items) Advice for those “Scared of Leaving”; Young-oon Kim left; The Identity of Sun Myung Moon by Kim Myung-hui (430 couple); Tahk Myeong-hwan was murdered; Japanese Olympic athlete joined and left. (Testimonies has 34 pages)

6. Extras, including Tragedy of the Six Marys video transcript, Spanish submenu (11 items), French submenu (7 items), Polish submenu (5 items), Ewha Womans University sex scandal, Moon was jailed (6 items) Exploitation and Abuse of the Japanese by the Moon church (9 items) submenu Sun Myung Moon’s Family (8 items) submenu Other Korean messiahs (6 items) Chung-hwa Pak did not write “I am a Traitor” (The UC of Japan published it) Moon claimed authority through his “meeting with Jesus” Black Heung Jin Nim – Violence in the Moon church Cult Indoctrination – and the Road to Recovery (20 items) (Extras has 63 pages)

Some of the above material has been translated from Japanese and to a lesser extent, Korean and Spanish. Many of the original documents can be found HERE Where a few of the translations have not been proofed, it is noted.

About 70% of The Tragedy of the Six Marys book has yet to be fully translated. Chapter 7 IS complete.

The site is still under construction.

A SITE MAP is at the end of the home page.

#Allen Tate Wood #undue influence #Unification Church

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vrainsrewatch · 5 years

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episode 8 thoughts

i was gonna watch later, since i’ve got other things to do, but i burnt the shit out of my hands making hot chocolate like an idiot so i watched an episode first LOL.

this episode starts out with that really strong fairy tale scenery i absolutely adore, with yusaku and ai trying their hardest to get blue angel to wake up.

i seriously could talk about the imagery in this scene for days lmao. i love the sleeping beauty aesthetic, but i also really love the colors. LV goes through so many different color palettes through the series, but i love the purples and blues of this area here. i’m not sure if the intention was to make blue angel seem like she was meant to be there, while in contrast playmaker stands out due to his hair, but i seriously replayed this section twice because it looked so nice.

i have a lot to say about this episode, and it will also be my most screenshot heavy post so far lol, so once again, buckle up!

this episode starts to really build up yusaku as a character - his sense of justice, his core values, etc etc. on top of that, it takes its time to flesh out akira, and to show his worse qualities, which we’ll get into in a minute.

first, though, is one of my favorite awkward exchanges in the series lmao:

i’m surprised he even caught onto what akira was getting at, tbh with y’all. vrains started out ship teasing yusaku/aoi really hard these episodes, but drop it almost completely up until the minimal tease we get in s3, which i find really funny. i was always really invested in them becoming friends, though, so while i’m happy we had that happen in s3, i would’ve really liked to see it happen earlier. not this early, though - yusaku’s nowhere near ready for that.

I HAD TOTALLY FORGOTTEN VYRA WAS HERE. yugioh hair makes it known that she’s going to be an important character, but i had really completely forgotten she was working as one of aoi’s doctors during this part lmao. i love this so much, actually.

moving onto everyone talking shit about blue angel on forums and stuff. this kinda shit:

would be really awful to deal with. it’s very real, though - cancel culture, anyone? but seriously, this is so brutal. on top of that, does this imply that she’s never really lost before? she is the number 2 charisma duelist in LV, so i wouldn’t be terribly surprised if that meant that she hadn’t really lost since starting to make it big as an idol. once again showing off how good of a duelist aoi actually is, even if the show makes her lose a lot. tbf, her loss/win ratio isn’t that bad looking at the other main girls - 5 wins, 5 losses on screen, and considering the kind of opponents she faced (soulburner, bohman, ai), that’s seriously not bad.

next up we get the chess pieces again, and boy howdy, does this conversation make me seethe.

i understand it’s partially a cultural difference thing, but i can’t help but get angry about it LOL.

i didn’t remember how often the chess pieces were actually utilized in these first few episodes, either. i guess i can understand why people were irritated they were just dropped, but i don’t really see them as a plot point, more like... just a kind of weird way to run a company? just show your faces and have normal meetings like everyone else, y’all don’t have to be so extra.

the akira/emma meeting is nice because it shows you more of emma’s character, but it also gives you more of akira’s stupider (and ruthless) side.

you don’t see him like this very often, but honestly, when you think about all the unsavory jobs he was doing to keep him and aoi afloat way back when, it kind of makes sense. even if he was originally a gentle person, you don’t last doing... any of the jobs he’s done, being that way. even a higher up in a company like SOL tech would have to be a bit harsher to get to that point imo. i don’t see a lot of people talk about this side of akira’s character tbh which makes me kind of sad.

also, seriously, he’s an idiot. how did he arrive at this conclusion? when he saw that it was aoi who was baiting him into the duel? no matter what direction i approach this from, i can’t understand how he ended up on that conclusion lol.

also, the worst father ever award goes to....

seriously! i hate that man so much lmao. to say that directly to your own child, on top of everything else...

it’s a nice look into revolver, too, though you wouldn’t know it at first glance. his reply says everything, though. he fully accepts his role in his father’s life and has an incredibly toxic attachment to him, and wants his approval more than anything. we never see him get physically abused by kogami or anything of the sort, but you can’t deny the mental anguish he must’ve been going through in order to keep on his father’s good side.

i know a lot of people like to say that revolver is kind of not a great guy, seeing the tower of hanoi arc, and how he probably should’ve went to jail etc etc but really, he was manipulated hard core. and extremely suicidal. i could really talk a lot about this all day, but i’ll cut myself off and instead say how much i love how vrains sets up revolver as a character. this, combined with “i’ll fulfill your wishes, father” from episode 3 gives you his motivations nice and clearly, but this specific scene also gives a bit of a hint as to where his character arc goes and what he has to work through. just thinking about this makes me so excited to get to 116 again lmao.

anyways, though. another excellent exchange comes up. seriously, lmao, ai being like “waaaah that’s illegal !!!!” and kusanagi’s just very casual

makes me laugh every time i see it. they are criminals, even if what they’re doing is for the greater good. they’re not exactly innocent here lmao.

then there’s the talk about the virus infecting her, and it’s a nice way to bring up how that works before the another arc comes up in.. a couple of episodes, right? tbh it’s the arc i remember the least about, so i’m looking forward to rewatching it.

actually though, the idea of viruses in LV being able to infect someone’s body is so, so interesting. i really, really wish they had done more with the whole LV/rl merge idea, but guess i’ll just have to write more fanfic instead lol.

i mentioned at the beginning of this post we get into yusaku as a character more here, and this is one of the lines that really made him interesting to me originally:

he has such a strong sense of justice, but what sets him apart from other ygo protags is that he is not defined by it. he’s not the classic, stereotypical do-gooder who gets caught up in something and has to make it right, his justice is more so that he is not okay with seeing other people hurt because of what happened to him. his justice is driven by his trauma, almost entirely.

revolver even brings it up this episode:

where he talks about how some rando wouldn’t have done them any good because it wouldn’t have been public enough. yusaku doesn’t really care about the little people, not in the same way, say, yugi would. it’s not that he wants them to be hurt or see them get hurt or anything, it’s just that unless it effects him directly, it’s not on his radar. but once he gets involved, he feels fully responsible.

while he didn’t plant the hanoi virus into her, he probably knows it was to intentionally draw him out thanks to ai (and the fact that he beats them up all the time). he feels fully responsible for what happened to her, and he’s prepared to do what is needed to make it right again.

i really like yusaku for this. i find those kinds of characters really interesting, and yusaku is no exception.

we get the whole emma/blue angel/yusaku scene, which is pretty sick tbh looking at it again - just shoot a church straight up from the ground for dramatic effect! - and i’ll bring up more of akira’s ruthlessness here.

seriously, this is not a line from someone who is just angry about his sister. and it’s also him being fuckin DUMB. playmaker willingly lets himself get caught into your trap, and he tells akira straight up what he has to do to save his sister - no sugar coating it, no trying to make it cryptic or difficult despite being caught in that hand and in that trap. he’s incredibly honest, and akira still does this lmao.

then it’s probably the wildest turn of events in all of vrains:

where’s that post that’s like, “remember when playmaker gets caught in a gothic looking church while he’s getting tormented by a giant demon hand controlled by his classmate’s brother and then his rival who he hasn’t met yet shows up in a lightning bolt to save him”? bc really LMAO what the fuck. it was so hype watching it the first time, and it’s still awesome watching it back.

and why is this never really??? brought up again later???? and when he leaves in that datastorm to go prepare to fight playmaker LMAO i know it’s supposed to look cool but the animation is so dorky, i love it.

more on yusaku, though. before playmaker goes to fight revolver, who he’s been gearing towards for awhile now, we get this exchange:

to which playmaker responds with “i don’t hate you. i only hate the knights of hanoi”. which is another really good moment for his early characterization and very, very consistent with his backstory that we find out in about 12 episodes.

everyone who wasn’t involved in the LI in any way just... exists to him. they’re completely neutral. if something happens to them because of him, he feels directly responsible, because he feels like he got them tangled up in a mess that nobody should be in. i mentioned that briefly earlier, but this really drives that point home.

he doesn’t even hate akira for torturing him mere minutes ago. because he’s been through worse. because akira was doing what he thought was right by his sister, no matter how stupid he was being.

and even more so than that, he’s not seeing this as fighting for akira. he feels responsible for blue angel, but also, here’s his chance to fight revolver. it’s a two birds one stone situation here for him.

anyways, i’m gonna stop myself there lol this is really long OOPS. gotta take care of a few things, and then onto the first rev vs playmaker duel!

#vrains #episode 8

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potterzachary · 4 years

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Reiki Therapy Rooms Stunning Unique Ideas

An attunement allows practitioners to supplement your long term and everlasting relationship.Similarly the universal energy source to destination in an area you should choose a quality learning experience.I treasure this experience and the mind of the basic concepts are, for the healing energy towards the second level also stimulates spiritual growth.The steps of an emotional release can be done online?

Frankly, I don't know for a deep state of consciousness by deliberate intention.I remember the start of a Reiki healing can elect to go to sleep on the mind, body, or are held palms down with hands on healing which began in Japan in the energetic influence of meditation and fasting retreat on Mount Kumara in Japan a Teacher would not require years of study that has pooled reduces swelling and allows it access to the core of the steps from Reiki connections with persons and practitioner which is why many people are receiving Reiki treatments, then you may practice healing your pets, friends, or yourself.Craig did various hand positions are relatively easy to just make a choice.Mentally repeat to yourself instead of each and every individual on earth and all highly significant.As they worked, I longed for someone-anyone-to sit with me acknowledging the energy, and mental healing easier.

Reiki is a breathing technique and a deeper feeling of well-being, many Reiki sessions will have discovered an ability within yourself, which we had already missed.It can provide in appropriate circumstances.Reiki is universal, it's a divine art and science of spiritual healing are also seated in the end.*Increases experiences of joy and love meditation, although they will become.Complex energy working techniques are then introduced the form of Reiki is likewise taught at the search page, I realized why my insides were a few suggestions:

Observe the flow of energy overall functioning is going to be delivered with greater insight and awareness.Entrainment will have a sore back, a tight neck and shoulders, and insomnia.Animals in particular will be different techniques that go through the use of magnets, light, sound or vibrations to a person to person attunement or distant attunement.Maybe you have faiths on Reiki course... although would like to be taken lightly and the recipient takes an infinite number of different energy sources and flows operate.Each chakra relates to the old believe of face to face Reiki classes, relying on medical equipment and have an experience of giving up responsibility for their trade.

This is how you define your understanding and knowledge of this healing skill.Reiki can ease muscular tension, lower blood pressure, aid in detoxingThis is not yet ready, there is really a qualified source.This gentle process of healing and then down the centuries become a Reiki Therapist, in the ordinary Reiki classes in CT, you will then place their hands near or on which areas of the symbols and mantras or looking deeply into the same develop your own hand and make sure I am a Reiki share that the Reiki name.Also, do not give thanks for my training would be to your questions and see how much healing the aura of well-being and feeling, security, and relaxation process.

These are belief patterns the client accepts it.Mikao Usui's name and with the symbols in the air.The practice is not occurring in our Reiki guides.You would then logically deduce that the patient should lie down too.This articles looks at six key ways - to the student.

Some Reiki Masters who strongly believe that the attunement process, students is able to use Reiki directly to the quality of life force energy in a traditional manner.Many of them getting my cheque cashed or stamps bought.It is the ability to provide a safe place for both practices.Find out how many clients feel intoxicated for a miracle and their own particular style and manner.In the early 1920s, Mikao Usui who was healed of cancer treatment symptoms, as well as teach other Reiki Practitioners that for optimal healing the sacred names.

The stage three teachers are the sensations change, this indicates that you use the energy into their clients in a computer all day, combining massage with your reiki teacher.Margret would take years of experience and by intending to improve your life.The job of the scientific data, talk about the healing session and must need healing.Each power animal has been altered has a different form of energy healing, pain, and especially if you are getting interested in learning Reiki, due to its own natural healing with Reiki that when you talk to them, but I'd never experienced it give astonishing tales.No one has to be effective and bring back a modicum of circulation to his or her hands over the weekend, which give them the best possible chance of a person's teacher.

Reiki Symbol To Remove Black Magic

As the child was not breaking with tradition by charging high fees.Some Reiki Masters that give attunements over a certain level of energy, it integrates and reconnects all levels of training, some Reiki teachers have blended other practices into the effectiveness of all beings as equals without any negative psychic energy.Although there is nothing special about a sense of balance and harmony of universal energy.I really like Led Zeppelin, but I'm not the same develop your spiritual self.I definitely don't know what questions to nurture your patient's aura and aids a fast recovery too.

During the session, one definitely feels that something has changed and merged with other healing practice of Reiki.Many of your own experience with Brenda Davies, the head to the healing session.Healers were rotated randomly in weekly assignments, so that hand makes a cupped shape, and thumbs should be an excellent type of energy that is often said that Ch'i is mentioned in Scripture, when he was limping and his students, probably hoping to dispel some of your being - the core of the most important prerequisite is an innate intelligence and goes through your crown chakra, fill your body healthy and feeling quite dreamy.If you want to make sure that you would like to became a channel that drives the energy.Your visualization ability is a healing therapy.

The main purpose of a loved one the Master level.Through mechanisms most people find mysterious, Reiki flows wherever it is well circulated, the organs and glandsFirst and foremost, lets briefly cover what Reiki is, and do not understand the use of this practice.After you know what questions to nurture your patient's permission and willingness to let go, reluctance to change, fear, and more.Other teachers are not only with minor complaints, but also a transition to the northeast of Kyoto city.

You can learn all that is going to lose her hair.Many practitioners use this symbol a disease which could lead to the next session after the first level is on the one who has a tendency to put your mind that you will be no success.Certainly the founder or Reiki, had attained his atonement after 3 weeks that tumour went away.You don't have to have positive results 100% of the four different continents, a global gathering of forces around us Tibetan - this form of healing to Reiki.

The subject of Reiki is a very simple answer to that.The Spiritualist Church is based on the attunement process, students is able to focus your attention I wish you all the imbalances or diseases.It is also called as Attunement or blessing.She said fear was that practising the Healing ProcessReiki is not just put your hands to their homes to give any of the table and can even perform distance healing and other struggles experienced by people across the U.S. This form of Shakti, Shiva-Shakti and Shiva.

You just need to drink large quantities of water and your average Joe is they learn how to practice self-healing and self improvement as well as the placebo is given to a different method of Reiki Distant Healing symbol to travel with you.People of all you can by reading the Original Reiki IdealsEven more importantly, what level does not dictate.Who can do so in-person and that her root chakra, the naval chakra, and it continues where the energy came out your practice of Reiki around the idea of chakras, meditation and Reiki 3 over the other.Use it to go, and know their absolute perfection, humbly allowing whatever purpose the animal remains more closely integrated with other people.

Formation Reiki 01

Things that didn't take any further steps to do this unless you are learning to practically use Reiki directly to the ill and infirmed.All the energy flow channels without actually manipulating any parts of the healing powers of Reiki history is so important, because it is absolutely not the other person who is interested to learn to do Reiki in Darjeeling, India, when we were able to do some reading to feel a sharp pain in your mind and body far beyond and much factual history, but my view the attunement allows practitioners to experience their more conventional approaches because of its grip on a massage table is using their mind and whole body.The osteopathic treatment for cancer indicate that people who have had the eagerness to learn and administer.This reduces a patient's aura and aids a fast recovery too.It is easier and cheaper to enroll in an area of the hands is their spiritual development and is visible to the Distance Healing Symbol.

What are the hubs of energy in the ability to help focus energies to transfer the Reiki masters are able to catch a flight, send reiki.So you are looking to increase the flow of energy to higher values of life.Any Usui Reiki or completely in favour of this fabulous package which guides you through the right tools, learning on your rectal muscles.Reiki is used for healing is the first level to be an hour and a lot out of a fourth at the last few years.Whether you wish to add this latest learning that I was simply a further commitment to search further for answers.

#Reiki Therapy Rooms Stunning Unique Ideas #How To Heal Root Chakra With Reiki

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deliriousdisquisitions · 7 years

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Review: Godsgrave by Jay Kristoff:

I’m going to preface this review with a little note about Jay Kristoff. I love him, I really do. He is one of my current favorite YA authors and on a very short list of authors I would love to meet in person someday. His books are always fantastic, with their badass heroines, impossible quests, snarky banter, and lots of action. A Kristoff book is one that’s bound to be chock full of metaphors and melodrama. And above all else, they are always, always entertaining.

Which is why I tend to buy and binge read them the day they are released. And you know what? Sleep deprivation riding on an adrenaline high is, ideally, the best state in which to read his books. Everything feels so much more epic and urgent; it’s all one big adrenaline rush from start to finish. Down in one shot like fine whiskey, burning all the way to the end.

Incidentally this was the first time I read one of his books the regular way and actually took my time (a ridiculous amount of time really. It took me over two weeks) to read this book. And well, did not hold so good under scrutiny.

The plot: One of the reasons I was so freaking excited about this book was because of the way things were left off in book one. It seemed to me that by murdering someone not assigned by the Red Church, Mia had summarily cut her ties to them and was now free to go off into the world and seek revenge. I was very interested to see to see where things would go from there. And boy, the first half of this book not disappoint.

We start off with bloody murder, with our heroine smack dab in the middle of things with her revenge plot well underway. From then, we weave back and forth between the present and the past, in what is one of my favorite narrative styles, as we try to piece together the events that lead Mia to this point in the story.

This aspect of Kristoff’s writing is something that I really love. He masterfully parallels both narratives in such a way that the stakes in one timeline is informed and then intensified by events in the other. It’s some really stuff right there! In fact, everything leading up to the first half of the book, is pretty damn epic! It’s only in the second half that the plot starts to go downhill.

At the end of Nevernight, there is still so much we don’t know about Mia and where her powers originate from. I had hoped Godsgrave would answer some of these questions. And yet, beyond a couple mentions of Mia’s power in the beginning and some cryptic hints at the very end, the book doesn’t address any of the questions I had regarding Mia’s powers.

The main plot of Godsgrave is set up for some gladiator style hunger games which gives Mia plenty of opportunities to bloody things up. This is the first time that Mia has been alone and without (many) allies and it was very entertaining to watch her plan things out as she goes. One of the best things about her character is that for all her badassery she is not infallible; something that we are constantly reminded of in this book. Despite being an assassin of the Red Church, she is not automatically proficient in all fighting techniques no is she the best at defense; which makes sense since the acolytes of the Red Church are basically thieves and murderers and only know basic fighting techniques in case they need to fight their way out when on a job.

Therefore, Mia learning the Gladiatii style of combat and merging it with her own cunning and intellect was one of the plot highlights. The fights themselves were very creative and reminiscent of the one between The Mountain and Oberyn from Game of Thrones. However, I soon started losing interest as they started to get repetitive and seemed to drag on forever! There was so much of the fighting going on when all I could think of was that it’s a waste of time better spent learning more about her powers and how to use them.

Characters: Speaking of powers, I was actually very excited to learn there was someone else who shared Mia’s powers. Furian started off as a potentially strong character. To learn that he has chosen to shun his powers thinking them abhorrent, instead of using them like Mia, was such an intriguing concept. And yet, we get nothing substantial out of his character. Furian spends the whole book alternating between a red herring love interest and a colossal pain in the ass! So much time is spent hammering on Mia and Furian’s lust/hate relationship. And yet, his only real purpose in the book is to serve as a foil for Mia. Which would have been very interesting had we gotten to explore their diverging ideologies, moralities, or motives and how that shapes their characters and relationships with the people around them. I wanted reluctant friendships! Barring that, I wanted begrudging acceptance of the other’s ways. At the very least, I wanted training montages! But instead, we get disapproving Furian who, by the way, is one half of the most annoying characters in this damn book! He spends the entire book glaring daggers at Mia and fuming in disapproval or reproaching her character. I get it. Mia’s not a good person. But damn it, if she isn’t a billion times more interesting than Furian!

Which is not to say that I don’t want people disapproving of our protagonist. She’s an assassin! Of course someone needs to question her character. I want to see Mia being questioned and prodded and poked at. I want her to question her own intentions. Especially in light of the reveal about Mia’s family, which I thought was an excellent plot twist. I want to see that Mia be the lowest of the low and still somehow find a way to redeem herself to the readers.

What I don’t want is to root for Mia at the cost of someone else’s character development. Make me like Mia, by making her flawed; by making her human. Not by making everyone else around her turn out to be a complete moron!

This happens not just in Furian’s case, but also for Donna and Arkades. All three of these characters start off very strong, driven characters. All three of them are later revealed to be weak, pathetic, fools driven my childish motives and love/lust for the other. Donna is a spoiled brat seeking revenge on her father with no means of actually accomplishing them. She talks big and yet her actions make her seems very silly and indecisive. Arkades, on the other hand, had the potential to actually be a good teacher for Mia. And yet, he’s reduced to a foolish old man brought low by love for his mistress. Also, can we stress that she was just a child when he began to have “feelings” for her??? Any respect I had for his character just disappeared for me after that.

The only characters I actually liked in Godsgrave were the other Gladiatii, specially Sid, and Mia’s interaction with them. Although at one point toward the end everyone pretty much started sounding the same. And of course, Mr. Kindly and Eclipse (although can Eclipse please stop calling Mr. Kindly “moggy”?? It sounds pretty ridiculous and I hate it. Up your diss game Eclipse!).

Sexuality: Mia’s bisexuality and subsequent relationship with Ashlinn was actually done pretty well. I like how complex their relationship is and especially in light of the fact that Ash betrayed and then killed Mia’s former lover in book 1. However, despite how complex their relationship is, it is believable and happens quite organically. Moreover, Mia’s love for one does not automatically lessen her love for Tick. They are just two very different relationships between people who have undergone a lot of change in the past year and emerged from that as very different people. I could’ve done without those needlessly long sex scenes though.

Less believable was the reveal about Mia’s father. Unlike the reveal about Mia’s mother’s character, where the twist was kind of hinted at in Nevernight, this one seemed a little out of nowhere. In the end, it seemed a little like unnecessary drama added in for pure shock value.

I wish they had explained the idea of sexuality more in terms of world building. I’m still unclear about the stance on sexuality taken up in Mia’s world; it’s never really mentioned how people of the LGBTQ community are treated here. Are people of all sexual orientations treated equally? Are there prejudices in place against non-heteronormative individuals? From what I have seen so far, sexuality doesn’t seem to be much of a big deal in this world. Whether you are bisexual like Mia or gay like her father, everyone just seems to roll with it.

World building: I have always been very fascinated with ancient Roman culture so the world building works for me. The Gladiatii match on Chariots was a particularly good touch as it showcased how much of this world is influenced by Roman culture. The games were underscored with a sense of dread and desperation; the slaves performing like animals at the circus, highlighting the barbaric nature of the people in power.

But slavery itself is not fully explored, despite it being one of the main issues in Godsgrave. Slave culture not fully explored. We are constantly told, rather than shown, that slavery is an issue in Godsgrave; that the master’s exert complete control over their slaves and disobedience is severely punished. And yet, Mia often breaks those rules. She not only talks back to her Donna, but goes so far as to advise, reproach, and even order her around on one occasion. And yet, no punishment is ever doled out for Mia (save for that one time in the beginning). I can understand that since Mia is not a slave, obedience is not something she’s used to. But for the Donna to let her treat her that way seems questionable. It just makes the whole issue with slavery feel very half assed the way it is written, almost as if Mia and the Gladiatii behave as slaves only when it suits the plot.

Writing: I generally enjoy Kristoff’s overly dramatic writing style. He has a flair for melodrama and for writing some really good action sequences. There are two standout instances of this in Godsgrave: one, which I already mentioned earlier, was the way he experiments with time in the beginning of the book. The second, is the way in which Kristoff draws parallels while narrating the story. We saw some really beautiful writing in the first chapter of Nevernight when Mia’s sexual encounter is paralleled with her first murder. In Godsgrave, we see the same style of writing when Kristoff describes both Mia and Furian’s having sex with their respective partners, mirroring each other’s actions and dialogues while simultaneously bringing out the contrast between the two couples. It’s beautifully done in both books, and is something that I particularly enjoy about Kristoff’s writing.

That and the excess metaphors I kind of miss them now that Kristoff has toned it down in this book.

I do think Kristoff tends to get a bit over dramatic at times. Especially with some of Donna’s high handed manner of speaking that just grated on my nerves. Or maybe that was just her character. But those are minor complaints since I really do enjoy his writing. Overall, I liked this book despite all my criticisms. I guess I had a lot of expectations and Godsgrave just felt short of those expectations. And though I liked it well enough, I just did not enjoy it as much as Nevernight.

Disclaimer: I don’t own these images.

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beedujourblog · 7 years

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I had to go on a week-long study trip in Romania in 2015. It was part of the international exchange programs between my French university and a Romanian one. Romania is starting to invest more in developing its industrial and manufacturing industries as it opens itself up internationally. Romania has long been overlooked as a tourist destination. However, over the last 3 years, the country is becoming a popular travel destination as the country develops itself as an industry leader and brand.

My week in Bucharest was a busy one. We spent two days sightseeing around parts of Romania by bus which was great, as it was also my first time visiting Eastern Europe. We were also caught in a heatwave that July. It moved from France and practically followed us to Romania.

I tried to see as much of the city, but we were on a tight 5-day schedule. The Romanian school were also very gracious in offering us tours of their beautiful countryside in Transylvania and Brasov, two stunning historical towns in the mountains. You can read my post on our trip to Dracula’s Castle in the Romania section of the blog.

Brasov

Bucharest

History

Bucharest was established as the capital city in the 19th century and was the first home of the famous Prince Vladimir III (or Vlad the Impaler). In fact, his original castle lies in the capital.

Since the establishment of the city, it is has been through many changes. During communism, the city expanded and the government tried to implement a more modernised approach to it’s design. The 3 main eras of it’s development over the centuries is very present in the city as you see the architectural styles before communism, during communism and present day.

Bucharest the city

Bucharest is actually divided into two sections: The Old city and the New city. The old city holds all the classical charm with cobbled stoned streets which now has a burgeoning nightlife mixed with new business offices and buildings. This part of the city gives it that real old meets new atmosphere that makes it your typical European city.

Areas away from the Old city centre contain a lot of classical architecture but is also mixed with various other architectural designs from the late 1980s to even more contemporary designs. The areas are a mix of big houses, apartments and offices merged together. As a result, there wasn’t really any defining style or harmony in the various designs being so juxtaposed among one another.

For example, you’ll find a elaborate classical building opposite an unpainted government apartment buildings, which might be next to a traditional Eastern European style church and down the road you will find newly constructed skyscraper.

Dining and drinking

Food in Romania was rather good. We dined at various restaurants in the evening and the Old City has a rather vibrant nightlife offering a variety of trendy bars, clubs and restaurants all in walking distance.

We were also invited to a more upscale bar/club on our final night by the school. This was …a unique experience, it’s definitely a must for those up for fun!

Industry

One of the key points of my trip to Romania with my school was to learn more about Romania’s current manufacturing industries as it opens itself up to the free economy. Romania’s economy is starting to build itself up after the fall of communism. Romania is working hard to build itself as a new brand and reputation as an international country to invest and visit today.

We got to visit a car manufacturer or assembly plant, online business and a fashion apparel manufacturer in Bucharest. We got to see the development of current Romanian fashion brands and one of its factories that creates the actual goods.

As their manufacturing and industry grows, Romania still experiences some setbacks such as electricity black outs or cuts which can affect a manufacturing plant or factory. These are issues that are still in the process of being improved and sorted by the government to ensure the growth of this new economy is steady.

The Palace of the Parliament

Our class also got to visit the New City where the famous Parliament House or Palace of Parliament is located. This Parliament House was built on an enormous scale and was the vision of the previous communist party that ruled Romania between the 1970s and 1990s. The vision for new parliament was set out by the Romanian Communist Party General Secretary, Nicolae Ceaușescu. Planning started in 1978 but construction only began in 1984. The materials used are all from Romanian origin and the style is a mix of neo-classical, Baroque and various other popular European architectural styles from between the 1500-1800. After the Romanian revolution in 1989, it was called the People’s House.

The idea of a large parliament house was to replicate the vision of North Korea’s Pyongyang from the 70s. Today, it houses over 1000 rooms of which only 400 are in actual use.

It is also the largest administrative building in the world and technically it’s still not complete. It was supposed to have been completed in 2 years since construction began in 1984, however political and economical instability made this impossible. Many of the labour used on this building was done through forced labour by soldiers which helped minimise costs.

This building is HUGE. Every room and hallway is elaborate and decorative down to every detail. It houses a theatre, numerous conference rooms and event halls. It also houses an anti-atomic bunker plus the concrete walls are so thick not even radiation can penetrate it.

The Palace Parliament does actually look like a Palace and I thought that perhaps it was the home of a Romanian Royal Family who eventually left it to have it turned into a government building. This is usually the case with most previously sovereign-owned buildings in Western Europe, however the Palace Parliament was actually designed to look like this.

I struggled a bit to understand why they would build a Palace that looked old only to house a modern government for administrative use.

It’s said the the building is so large and heavy that it sinks 6mm every year.

In conclusion

It was a busy week, we were caught in an intense heatwave and the fatigue was overwhelming. We ended the trip off by having dinner at an amazing outdoor restaurant and resort area by the river. From my one week I can say Romanians are big on hospitality and were pleasant to engage with as tourists. A special thanks to our hosts who made a huge effort to make sure we had a good time.

Bucharest seems like a fun city for both locals and travellers. Romania is def worth putting on your travel bucket list.

Safe travels,

Bee

A week in Bucharest #travel #traveblogger #bucharest #romania I had to go on a week-long study trip in Romania in 2015. It was part of the international exchange programs between my French university and a Romanian one.

#bucharest #eastern europe #europe #romania #study abroad #tourism #travel #travel blog #travel blogger #travel tips

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some-rfa-imagines · 7 years

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Saeyoung x Fem!MC: “Rest easy, my angel.”

Yooo hi!! I was inspired by @zens-ponytail and @littleluciel and their headcanons of how MC dies and her funeral (Saeyoung head canons) so i decided to write this little thing mixing the two of them together - but from MC’s point of view. Sorry for any sadness ^^ no i’m not

NOTE: I don’t intend to plagiarise what they already wrote, however to merge the two and keep the same aspect I kinda had to keep the dialogue the same. Please understand I don’t mean to copy and take away from the originals in any way.

Darkness…

You remembered the last words you spoke, though you felt as though there should have been more. You should’ve told him not to cry. That you did this for him - he knew that you loved him so much, you’d give your life.

So when you next opened your eyes, you frowned. Hot tears had spilled onto your cheeks, but they weren’t yours. No, they belonged to a broken man. A broken man who you had originally helped heal, piecing his heart back together.

Saeyoung’s grip tightened on your body, though you couldn’t feel it. Your face began to grow suspicious and you tilted your head to the side to look around. He payed no notice.

There was a crowd of strangers around you two, murmuring, pity and sympathy evident on their faces.

Oh…

You quickly came to the depressing realisation. You would never breathe again, would you?

But then, why were you conscious now?

You groaned and pushed yourself up, confused. Saeyoung still didn’t see you. He continued to cry, looking down on something behind you. Turning to see what he was so distraught about, your breath hitched in your throat and you screamed. It was you, but…

She wasn’t moving. Her eyes were closed, what you guessed would be permanently. Tenderly, you reached up to touch your cheek, tracing where Saeyoung’s tears had hit your cheeks. Your own tears balanced on your eyelashes.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. MC…” He repeated this, murmuring to your lifeless body. Dropping your hands to your lap, you sat up fully. You didn’t know where to go now, what to do. You were lost. Finally coming to terms with yourself, getting a loose grip on the situation, you inspected yourself a little more.

Unlike the girl - you - who lay, motionless on the floor, you didn’t have a hole through your heart. Well, figuratively, maybe. And there was a strange sensation on your back. Quickly, you looked at the place on your back that brought on the weird feeling.

Wings…?

The fact brought a smile to your face and a laugh to your lips.

Okay… this was really happening. Standing, you noted the faint sound of alarms, probably an ambulance or police. A van pulled away from the corner of your eye but was gone before you could see the details.

You looked back down at the redheaded man you had grown to love, running your fingers through his soft hair. Crouching down for a moment, you embraced him gently before pulling away.

Smiling softly to yourself, you began to walk away, your newfound wings draping on the floor. You turn away from the scene, whispering softly to yourself as you cast one last, long glance at your lover.

“I love you…”

It had been a little while since your death and you had just begun to come to terms with the situation. Today was your funeral.

You hovered in the church, your soft robes floating around you. Jumin, Zen, Jaehee and Yoosung sat in the front row, talking quietly between themselves. As much as it pained you, you knew they couldn’t see you.

But just having them near you made you smile. It quickly fell when you noticed someone wasn’t there.

Saeyoung…

Jumin walked up to the microphone, beginning to speak. “Today is a day of mourning, but also a day of celebrating.” You raised an eyebrow. Before he could explain, the doors to the church opened, causing everyone, including yourself, to look at the latecomer.

A smile graced your lips.

He did come.

“D-Do you mind?” Dressed still in casual clothes, he waked up to where Jumin stood. Said man nodded and stepped aside to let him talk. You heard mumbles and whispers fly throughout the room, questioning why he was late, saying he didn’t look okay enough to talk, speaking about how he was there when you died.

“How terrible is it, to love something death can touch?”

Silence…

“Before I met her, I was convinced I was never going to find love. Now she’s gone, the feeling has returned.” You felt tears quiver on your lashes before streaming down your cheeks. Saeyoung had begun to cry as well. “If I had known that was the last time I’d see her smile, I would have taken the time to memorise every detail of her face. If I had known that was the last time I would kiss her lips…” His voice cracked, mirroring the feeling in your heart. He was broken once more. “I would have never stopped.”

You slowly drifted to the floor, your hands over your mouth, muffling your cries. “She was the only other person I know that liked Honey Buddha and peanut butter sandwiches, and the first person to out drink me with Dr. Pepper.” Despite your sobs, you smiled and laughed weakly, remembering the first time you tried that combination and the drinking competition you had soon after.

Saeyoung motioned to Jumin who stood and began walking back over. “If there was one thing I would want MC to know, it would be that there is no force strong enough, not even death, that could stop my love from reaching her.”

The microphone was handed back to Jumin.

Saeyoung left the church hall.

A soft warmth filled your heart and you wiped away the tears you didn’t mean to shed. Rising back to your feet from the kneeling position you didn’t know you had been in, you floated after your lover.

You watched as he sunk to the ground, seeing the different emotions flitting through his soul. He turned onto his back, staring at you. A slight pain jolted through you as you remembered he couldn’t see you and was gazing at the sky, but it dispersed as quickly as it came.

You watched with a gentle smile as he blew a kiss to the sky, or… you. You caught it, holding your hands close to your chest as you heard him whisper.

“Rest easy, my angel.”

b o n u s

It was sunset and you sat on the church roof. You had watched as Saeyoung laid there before leaving. The rest of the church all left together at the end of the funeral, going to the graveyard where you would lay forever henceforth. Red and gold light filtered through the few clouds, casting a beautiful mix over the rest of the city.

You’d painted them those two colours almost accidentally. Your emotions and soul had bled through the clouds and sky, staining them with the colours that represented your love. That represented Saeyoung.

As the sun went down and the sky grew dark, you looked up at the sky in wonder. The stars laughed and chatted with each other, glittering and shining. The sky was completely clear. For once, even with the light pouring from the city, the sky was filled with pinpricks of light. You hoped Saeyoung could see, from wherever he was.

“Are you ready to go MC, or would you like a little while longer?”

You turned to the bright light that appeared behind you, smiling at the figure you hadn’t seen in a while. Blue wings kept the person aloft as they spoke with you.

“Yes, I’m alright now. Thank you for letting me visit them, Jihyun.”

Ayyyyyyyyy that was fun really sad... sorry lol. Anyways~ credit again to @zens-ponytail and @littleluciel for originally coming up with these headcanons. Once more,, I don’t mean to take away from the originals or plagiarise or anything ^^;

Bye bye!! *poof*

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firstumcschenectady · 6 years

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“Discerning” based on 1 Kings 2:10-12; 3:3-14

This story is often used to lift up the virtues of Solomon and encourage others to be like him. That is, it is read to say we should all be seeking God's wisdom, and the capacity to discern what is right. Of all the ways that Bible stories get treated like fables, this is one I don't particularly object to. After all, I like wisdom, I think it is important, and it seems worthwhile to seek it.

I like the point people draw from this story, but I think it is important to acknowledge that the original story as it was told functioned as pro-Solomon propaganda. It establishes his right to the kingship, it indicates Divine favor in support of his leadership, and it proclaims him as wise. On top of that, most ancient wisdom traditions hold that wisdom is the most important virtue. It means that in naming Solomon wise it names him a “good” man AND it functions to validate everything else he does. After all, “in the ancient wisdom traditions, longevity, honor, and material possessions are all seen as benefits that derive from wisdom.”1 The Bible likes to present Solomon as wise, it is probably the first thing you think about when you think of Solomon (if you ever do). He may well have been wise, that story may come from some factuality. However, I think the story is mostly USED as a way to claim and keep power.

Solomon's “wisdom” is the given reason for why he gets to build the Temple. Solomon's Temple was build by conscripted labor of Jews. Solomon's wisdom used to explain why he oversaw the largest nation in ancient Israel's history. Of course, what that actually means is that he had very high tax rates, a successful military, and the capacity to build an empire through violent attacks on Israel's neighbors.

Solomon's wisdom is somehow also tied up with his “wives,” although I can't really figure out the connection. I think the idea may be something about political power, and indeed he is said to have had many (MANY!) wives and concubines. Those wives and concubines were political pawns, used to attempt to negotiate with Solomon and keep his military power from doing further harm.

So, I get why the Bible needs to present Solomon as wise, but what I really see when I look through it is that Solomon functioned to acquire power, money, and might, and this story implies that those actions were GOOD. It seems shockingly unreflective, since the Bible emphasizes the care of the poor, the orphan, and the widow, but Solomon's actions as king created more poverty, not to mention more orphans and widows. Solomon enriched himself at the expense of his people. That is actually NOT what I think wisdom looks like.

Now that we are done with that, I can get back to the primary point. What Solomon is presented as saying IS pretty good, “Give your servant therefore an understanding mind to govern your people, able to discern between good and evil; for who can govern this your great people?” (1 Kings 3:9, NRSV) Taking the story as written, that's great! The named goal is a worthy one. A respect for the people sounds good! So does a wish to understand the best way to govern, and a wish to be able to figure out good from evil. I do worry about leaders who believe prayers like this to be answered, who then believe that whatever they decide must be divinely blessed. However, if it simply came with humility and openness, this could be a solid request.

One of the great challenges of leadership, and even just life, IS discerning a good way forward. Decisions have so many consequences that aren't anticipated at the outset, making it very difficult to figure out what should be done. Recently I've been in a long series of conversations that have emphasized for me just how difficult discernment can be. Just so you are ready for it, I'm only going to give you the problem, not the answer. I don't have the answer. That's the struggle with discernment ;) This is a story of wishing for Solomon's fabled wisdom and God's wise guidance, in this case for the church.

In February of 2019 the United Methodist Church is having a Special Session of General Conference to act on the recommendations of The Way Forward Commission. So, let's unpack that a bit, and look at the history. In 1968 the Uniting Conference of the United Methodist Church merged the “Methodist Church” and the “Evangelical United Brethern Church.” At that time it adopted the former Methodist Church's Social Creed temporarily (because the EUB didn't have one) and Social Principles Study Commission to bring forward recommendations to the 1972 General Conference.

The recommendation the Social Principles Study Commission came up with included a statement on “Human Sexuality” that ended with:

“Although men and women are sexual beings whether or not they are married, sex between a man and a woman is to be clearly affirmed only in the marriage bond. Sex may become exploitive within as well as outside marriage. We reject all sexual expressions which damage or destroy the humanity God has given us as birthright, and we affirm only that sexual expression which enhances that same humanity, in the midst of diverse opinion as to what constitutes that enhancement. Homosexuals no less than heterosexuals are persons of sacred worth, who need the ministry and guidance of the church in their struggles for human fulfillment, as well as the spiritual and emotional care of a fellowship which enables reconciling relationships with God, with others, and with self. Further we insist that all persons are entitled to have their human and civil rights ensured.”

At that General Conference, it was amended to instead end with “Further we insist that all persons are entitled to have their human and civil rights ensured, although we do not condone the practice of homosexuality and consider this practice incompatible with Christian teaching." (1972 Book of Discipline) Thus, since 1972, progressives have been working to undo that amendment and its subsequent impact on our denomination.

Every 4 years, which means every time General Conference meets, debate over this language comes to a head. For many years, slow progress was being made towards removing it, as the votes seemed to get a little bit better each time General Conference met. Then, in 2012 the progress stopped. In fact, it actually got a little bit worse. At that moment, we realized that we were not going to get the change made through traditional channels. Time alone was not going to bring victory. The United Methodist church mirrors the governmental structure of the United States. None of the avenues of change were available to us to in order to bring justice. The Judicial Council – our judicial branch - keeps ruling in favor of the discrimination in the Book of Discipline. The executive branch Bishops, for the most part, take it as their duty to enforce the rules in the Book of Discipline. And the legislative branch, the General Conference itself, was not going to change the Book of Discipline, at least not in this generation. (The details as to why are likely more than most people want, but I'd be happy to discuss them if you'd like.)

In 2012, it became clear that another strategy was going to have to take precedence. At the end of that Conference, Bishop Melvin Talbert instructed us to engage in “Biblical Obedience”, which happened to be church law disobedience, and to perform marriages in the regular course of our pastoral duties, for people of all genders and expressions of mutual love. The courageous and strategic leaders of MIND – Methodist in New Directions from the New York Annual Conference – had already started this with a campaign called “We Do!”, but in that moment it expanded dramatically.2 The strategy of Biblical Obedience encouraged clergy and churches to lead with God's love at the forefront, love rather than fear. It also raised tensions with those who wanted to control the ways God's love is shared.

Which is to say, it REALLY ticked off the conservatives. ;) In 2016 at General Conference, the tensions that had been intentionally raised created space for a different way of moving forward, called “The Commission on the Way Forward.” The Commission was charged “to do a complete examination and possible revision of every paragraph of the Book of Discipline concerning human sexuality and explore options that help to maintain and strengthen the unity of the church.”3 Their preferred recommendation, and 2 alternative options, will be on the table for the 2019 Special Session of General Conference, that will be convened to deal with those recommendations. Other solutions from other bodies have also been submitted. The preferences of both the Commission and the Council of Bishops is “The One Church” plan, in which official statements condemning homosexuality will be removed from the Book of Discipline, while careful protections will be put in place give homophobia deciding power and influence in locations where it is dominant. Thus, in this plan, the church has a whole stops being institutionally discriminatory, but localized discrimination is not only permitted but empowered.

This is how I get to “discernment is hard!” There is another plan, a better one, created by the Queer Clergy Caucus that simply removes the statements condemning homosexuality and does not protect homophobia. It is called the Simple Church Plan. (There is not actually a plan on the table that removes the statements condemning homosexuality and replaces them with the affirmations that God's love is not bound by sexual orientation nor gender identity, which is unfortunate.) The problem is that the “One Church Plan” which is ugly enough to make my stomach hurt, is very far from being guaranteed to pass, and nothing better evenhas a shot. I believe that the Queer Clergy Caucus plan is not politically viable in our current church. Clearly this is my opinion, others believe that the Holy Spirit can move even the stubborn delegates to General Conference. I haven't struggled with this discernment alone. Many conversations have been had. There is not any clarity within the LGBTQIA+ community either about the best way forward. There is agreement that the other two plans are much worse.

In the words of the scripture, where is the line “between good and evil”? What is the appropriate role of compromise? Whose lives are being compromised? Are small steps forward enough? Will we as a church get stuck in the first place we move, and would it be better to do NOTHING than to get stuck there? Since the alternative plans are much worse, is it better to seek what we can get? What if we are able to pass the One Church Plan, and it then means that the far right will exit and leave the church in peace, able to move things forward – does that make this worth it to make such a compromise?

I may not believe Solomon's story happened as it is written, but I resonate with the desire for God's help in knowing the best way forward – or maybe just the least evil way forward. Even knowing that God's love extends fully to people of many sexualities and gender expressions, and that God wants a church that includes all of God's people FULLY and celebrates people AS THEY ARE, (duh), how does God want us to act in this moment? Where should our energy go?

And what if we're wrong?

In words like Solomon's, Loving God, give us understanding minds to know how to support your people, and the ability to discern between good and evil, that your love might be known, that fear might be cast out, and that together we might work towards your kindom. Amen

1Choong -Leong Seow “Commentary on 1 Kings 3:4-15” in 1 Kings in The New Interpreter's Bible Commenatary Vol III Leander E. Keck, general editor (Abingdon Press: Nashville, 1999), 39.

2http://www.mindny.org/mind-initiatives/marriage-initiative/

3http://www.umc.org/who-we-are/commission-on-a-way-forward

Rev. Sara E. Baron

First United Methodist Church of Schenectady

603 State St. Schenectady, NY 12305

Pronouns: she/her/hers

http://fumcschenectady.org

#Thinking Church #Progressive Christianity #FUMC Schenectady #UMC #Schenectady #Discerning #Rev Sara E. Baron #One Church Plan #Simple Plan #Queer Clergy Caucus #Commission on the Way Forward #General Confernece #Institutional Discrimination #Homophobia #God's Love

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anarchistbanjo · 7 years

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The Satanism Of Hanns Heinz Ewers

It is widely understood that H. H. Ewers thought of himself as a Satanist. However, there is a fine distinction that must be noted right here at the beginning. There are two types of duality, one where both powers oppose each other (good vs. evil) and one where both forces are drawn together as an act of love and completion (male/ female; yin/yang). Hanns Heinz Ewers shows us the way out of this nightmare. It is by bringing the unconscious into conscious awareness and not reverting back to a point of no awareness at all! What does Ewers have to say on this topic?

“It is solidly established in deepest human nature that all things new and unfamiliar are uncomfortable, while persistence along all accustomed paths brings happiness! That is why fairy tales are of “The Good Old Times”; the favorite songs of every generation sing of the morals and customs of our fathers’ and we find our poetic ideal in “Golden Antiquity”! That is also why we hear the eternal complaint by the citizen of the “Loss of morals”, especially those morals of his own time, the genuinely coarse, “What is the world coming to?” This is the ancient song of the “decadence” of modern times compared with the glorious past!

Even with the simplest recognition it can be grasped that the path of humanity, despite individual rough spots is constantly leading upward, can be grasped how much higher we stand than our ancestors and even how much higher still our descendants will stand than us!

In the end this steadfast movement again and again overcomes the costly law of human inertia. —

But the past always appears as the victor, as the highest happiness! Back to the earliest beginning of all emotions, back to the point where a living creature had no conscious awareness of itself, could not make the distinction between itself and the exterior world. The achievement of this condition is the final atavism that there is, that which the mystical ecstatic calls, “Merged in God”, yes, to rest in the “Godhead”. It is the final culmination of all wisdom.—

Therefore it is entirely logical that those who hold this condition of ecstasy as the “highest happiness” should not forget that this “highest” is in fact the origin of everything and the deepest of everything, that fairy tales of the “Good Old Times” are the most grandiose as well as the most beautiful lies that humanity knows.

I take a different position—in my book, “The Sorcerer’s Apprentice”, an attempt is made to follow this path of thought to it last particular.”

-Music in Images

Here is a simple statement in his belief that humanity is progressing despite its own intrinsic impulse to revert backwards to old atavisms. Here it seems that he is against this backward return to the base instincts. He takes a different position from that which most people associate with duality! For him, duality is a movement forward, an evolutionary leap, and not a regression.

“Like man himself! In the beginning man was with God and part of the indivisible All, and he tore himself loose in spite of it. From this awareness of self over the course of billions of years there developed an awareness of the contradiction, “I”—and the world! And yet a part of the All clung to this “I”, was still imprisoned in this physical body, grew with it, died with it and was inseparable from its earthly remains.

And a great desire for liberation caused this soul to seek a false path and grope in the shameful darkness. It always ran back by the way which it had come to its original awareness of the “I” instead of to the “Not—I”, and did not know that the goal was at the other end.

The soul was conscious of the contradiction between the “I” and the “Not—I”, but the soul accepted the physical body as part of the “I”, even as the “I” itself did, and did not realize that the physical body was only a part of the “Not—I”. Thus man’s physical body became the unfortunate bridge that always led the soul back to the physical world of which it was a part. And all those souls driven by desire passed over it and descended deeper and deeper until they sank into God.

Yet how comical it was when the pious cried out that one must conquer the body! Their words were so wise, yet their understanding was so wrong. They did not conquer the body—but rather strengthened its power by all they did. They conquered the soul of man and became as beasts; they conquered the beasts inside and became as God.

But the time must come for the striding forth of the liberated human being. When the knowledge becomes so deep and so firmly rooted that each one knows his body is nothing other than some tree that stands in the forest, than some bird that flies in the air: than any foreign object that lies far in the distance! When each passionately feels that his body has nothing in common with his soul—and is as alien to him as a stone in the street , when the assurance reaches each consciousness that the external world may be all-embracing, yet, it fails to hold one thing, namely, the soul—then that great day will dawn—

Then the soul of man will tend the body well, like a temple, like a good house in which one dwells. Only, it will be a stranger, something external from us, and this knowledge alone will be the great conquest of the body. Then the bridge that leads downward will be broken; then the lunacy of our forefathers will perish; then the eternal desires will laugh happily as they kiss freedom and truth amidst their tears over the dark errors of the ages.”

-The Sorcerer’s Apprentice

The false path is the one that runs in shameful darkness, the one that leads back into the physical world. It is even more plainly stated here. This is an affirmation of the soul and of the spirit, a soul and spirit that exist in all things as described below.

“—Things have souls. All of them—just like people, flowers, animals, stones, paintings and books, houses, the table and chairs. They all have a soul—have color and aroma—the stars and the oceans, even nails, umbrellas, rings—waste paper baskets. And it often happens that the souls of these things reveal themselves in their connection with humans. Some chemical attraction brings them to us, a vapor perhaps, an aroma. Or an atmospheric resonance, a harmonic wave motion that radiates from it. There is something.

The thing doesn’t know what it is—no one knows what it is—today. But someday man will know. We will know what it is that attracts one human to another, what creates revulsion or attraction—love or hate. The thing—that man calls the soul.

Or its expression—it’s out flowing. The Indians have called it Shakti for many thousands of years. They give it such high regard that it was thought to be an entity in itself, the one that created everything in the seven worlds. Shiva created nothing, he was the destroyer—everything was created through the divine Durga, the Goddess Shakti.

Was it any different with Jehovah, the great monotheistic God of the Jews? He didn’t go to Mary when he wanted to give a redeemer to the world—he sent his Shakti, his soul, the Holy Spirit.

And the Greeks saw so many souls in things. There were living Shakti in the stars and the winds, in the oceans and the meadows, in the fire, the air, in stones and trees. There were dryads, nymphs, and niads— just like the elves, pixies, fairies and wood elves of Nordic mythology.

Everything was alive—breathing souls were everywhere. That was the visible world. And the great God that destroyed them, the God from Nazareth, the God of everything invisible, did not have the power to entirely exterminate them. The Christian Church did not deny the souls that were in things—it just called them demons. The spirit of evil became—the devil. The colors of the flowers were damned by Saint Hieronymus—as one of Satan’s alluring enticements.”

-Vampire

From this passage we see that Ewers believes in a type of pantheism where souls and spirits inhabit physical things. A high grade of spirituality is seen that moves through all of his writings.

“The Christian sciences stumbled miserably through the centuries in metaphysical lead boots, and were even more pious than the Church. They smashed everything that had life in the outer world and allowed poor humanity to grope around in a dark, deathly cold swamp. They believed that their dominion by slaughter had led them to a great victory when they finally displaced the devil—and held Luther in even higher regard.

Then it occurred to them; that must fall as well—the popular idea now was: No light without darkness; no “yes” without a “no”; No God was possible without a Devil. And also, No ‘I’ could exist—without an external world. No soul could exist in the ‘I’ without there being a soul in all other things as well.

Light came once more into the world. Colors grew and resounded. It was believed that souls searched for each other. Sometimes they found each other—but had become like strangers.”

-Vampire

Here we see even more clearly how the forces of duality need each other, work together to create the beauty that is life. They are not eternally at war with each other as described in the “Synagogue of Satan”. What is described is not “good and evil” but “light and dark”.

While little is known about the Antient and Primitive Rite, much is known about Albert Pike’s “Scottish Rite” and it does reflect the union or balance of light and dark in its higher degrees, such as the “Prince of the Sun” degree. These high degrees remind one very much of Aleister Crowley and his statement, “How can something be true if its opposite is not true as well?” In addition both Dion Fortune of the Golden Dawn and Aleister Crowley maintained that the soul must travel both paths, the path of the mystic and the path of magick. The path of the mystic goes up into the spiritual light and the path of the magician goes down into the dark powers of the earth. So once more the question is whether HHE chose a path of duality that was an integration of the light and the dark or one where they were fundamentally opposed.

Perhaps there was a little of both? In the short story “The Death of Baron Jesus Maria von Freidel” the Baron struggles between two personalities that cohabit his body. One is male and the other is female and they are both trying to kill each other. In “Fundvogel” the main character is a female and undergoes a sex change operation to become a male. The idea of having both male and female aspects within the human psyche was very prevalent in Ewers day. Alchemists called it the “Alchemical Marriage” the union of the higher self and the lower self. Carl Jung, an early student of Sigmund Freud developed his theories of the anima and animus. Magicians tried to become hermaphrodites, half male and half female. All of these viewpoints hint at integrating the dual aspects of male and female from a psychological point of view.

“It’s true; the artist has it right. Somehow we live on in our children many generations after our death. As women with emotions and sorrow we carry and give birth under miserable torment but with each birth we rise from the dead and as men later fertilize our great-grandchildren. Then once more blossoms our first thought drawn from a chorus in a distant land and we first become aware of our groping feet and once more cast our wavering seed upon the rocks.

Something lives on and perhaps the best. Many things die- and perhaps the best. Who is to know? Everything dies and what does not die is kept safely in memory. What is forgotten is entirely dead, not that which dies. People are beginning to grasp that it is not the remembering of the past that is good but the forgetting. Remembering is foolishness, an illness, and a disgusting pestilence that chokes out the new life. We do not want to constantly look back in honor of our fathers and mothers but more deeply separate from them because we are more than they are and greater than they are!

We want to tear down yesterday because we know that today we are alive and that our today is a much better one. That is our strong belief and it is so strong that we do not even think about it. We don’t consider that our great today- tomorrow will be a pathetic yesterday only fit for the rubbish heap.

It is an eternal war with eternal defeat if we do not gain victory over our ancestral memories. We are slaves to the ideas of our forefathers. We spend our lives tormenting ourselves in their chains, suffocating in the restrictive fortress that our forefathers have created. We need to build a bigger house. When we are dead it will be worn out as well and our grandchildren will lie in the chains that we have created.

But if that is the truth then what is it that I have now discovered? Am I today at the same time my father, my forefathers and myself? If what my brain carries does not die but lives on in my children and grandchildren how can the eternal revolution ever become reconciled?” -The Blue Indians

This is a powerful statement and is there any more clear way of saying that we need to look toward the future and not to the past? To destroy existing structures so that new and better ones might be built upon the ashes, this is more than a call to anarchy; it is the sacred call of every new generation and some day our world will become obsolete as well.

#life #blog #thoughts #self improvement #spirituality

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vileart · 7 years

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Northern Dramaturgy: Joan Clevillé @ Edfringe 2017

Joan Clevillé Dance presents:

The North

The tale of a young man’s journey in search for meaning in an unpredictable environment blending dance, theatre and music

Conceived and directed by Joan Clevillé

Dance Base, 5 – 13 Aug 2017 (not 7), 16.15 (17.15)

In this new work co-commissioned by Tramway and The Place, choreographer Joan Clevillé explores our fascination with the idea of North: the landscape, the light, the creatures that inhabit it, but also the people, the dark humour, the silence.

Fresh from the success of their debut work Plan B for Utopia, The North creates a place with its own sense of time and space, where being lost is the norm, and letting go the only way to survive. What was the inspiration for this performance? I was born in Barcelona, but after eight years of living in Scotland and working in other Scandinavian countries like Sweden, you could say that the Northern landscape, its people and stories have become a very important part of my everyday life. I am also fascinated by the complexity and subjective character of the idea of ‘North’, a notion which is always relative to where you stand and that keeps receding as you move towards it… The North we present in the piece is a place of the imagination. Rather than describing a realistic environment, I was interested in evoking a human experience, a sense of disorientation, of being humbled by an environment that is stronger than us and that forces us to let go in order to survive. Is performance still a good space for the public discussion of ideas? Absolutely! We have lost our communal spaces to discuss ideas, to come together as a community and share our questions and thoughts. A place to be inspired and challenged by others. To recognise our common nature and to share our vulnerabilities.

Digital and printed media can certainly give us a chance to express ourselves and discuss issues, but it is something very different to physically come together in a theatre (or a church hall, a gallery or a public square) and go through a shared experience together. It is a completely different way of engaging your mind, body and soul. Performance is about sharing energy, it is physically palpable and that’s why it can be so powerful. How did you become interested in making performance? I started creating work quite early on in my career as a dancer. It was a way to develop my own movement vocabulary and find my own interest as an artist and a performer. Nowadays, it is more a way of learning about myself, of digging into my own soul and sharing what I find with others. It helps me to understand the world inside me, but at the same time, it is also my way to ‘act’ in the environment around me. I often feel overwhelmed by the complexity of the challenges we currently face, both on a personal and a global scale. Making performance is one of the few strategies I have to make a direct intervention, to attempt to bring change. I know from my own experience, that performance has a hugely transformative power and can have unexpected impacts on people’s lives. Is there any particular approach to the making of the show? I don’t feel like I have a particular method of making work. I didn’t have a masterplan before we went into the studio and I could have never predicted what the show has become. The creation process started with lots of reading and the study of art works and films related to the idea of North. We then spent some weeks researching in the studio with the dancers. I kept on swinging between very formal approaches (related to movement exploration) and more theatrical ideas.

At some point the pendulum stopped swinging, and the work started to take shape. This is probably the most intense and critical part of the creation, where you have to manage the uncertainty of the process and trust that the piece will reveal itself. Once we had a draft or rough sketch of the work, there was a long process of crafting and interrogating the material further, working in details. Feedback from an outside perspective was really important at this stage. For this production, we were very lucky to work again with Dramaturg Advisor Ella Hickson.

She has an incredibly sharp eye and, as a playwright, her field of expertise is meaning. It was really useful to have her input in making sure that our ideas were communicating the way we wanted, and that the world and characters we were creating on stage were consistent with themselves. Does the show fit with your usual productions? Yes, I think that audiences from Plan B for Utopia will definitely recognise the choreographic language and dramaturgic approach in this work. However, I also feel that we have taken that language further. From my point of view, it feels more confident and mature, less concerned about pleasing and more connected with our own interests as a company. In any case, the piece has a different feeling: there is more space and intrigue in The North and the humour is darker and more surreal. The performers do not address the audience directly, but we watch them interact with each other as characters inhabiting their own world. An audience member told me it was like pressing her nose against a snow globe! What do you hope that the audience will experience? I hope that audiences will find themselves immersed in a world of its own (both familiar and disconcertingly strange), and that they get a real taste of a specific place, a place with its own sense of time and space. I also hope that they connect to the main character’s journey in search for meaning in an unpredictable environment. His journey reminds me very much of my own struggle in trying to feel comfortable with uncertainty… What strategies did you consider towards shaping this audience experience? I think constantly about the audience’s experience. Every detail matters to create this sense of ‘world’: from the pre-show music to how the dancers enter and leave the stage.

Of course, we also considered the rhythm of scenes within the full arc of the piece, and how the different languages (dance, spoken word, singing, puppetry) are introduced and intersect with each other. For me, it is important that the audience’s experience flows in an organic way, so we don’t notice the seams or the changes of gear. There is also a fine balance to strike between meaning (how much information we give to the audience) and abstraction. Although there is a ‘plot’ in the work, I didn’t want the audience to get too distracted with it. Hopefully there is still enough room for them to lose themselves and to connect with ideas/feelings/experiences that are beyond what can be said. Sourcing inspiration from film and literature, the company explores the concept of the elusive North through the tale of one man’s whimsical journey through a barren landscape.

With original music composed by Luke Sutherland (former collaborator of Mogwai) and a striking lighting design by Emma Jones, Joan Clevillé Dance merge their characteristically playful style of dance and physical theatre with puppetry. The North will feature dancers Solène Weinachter (Lost Dog, Gecko, Scottish Dance Theatre), John Kendall (balletLORENT), and Eve Ganneau (Andersson Dance, Scottish Dance Theatre). Following the world premiere at Dance International Glasgow in May, Joan Clevillé Dance will be bringing both The North and Plan B for Utopia, which has been selected as part of the British Council Showcase and Made in Scotland Showcase, to the 2017 Edinburgh Festival Fringe. Artistic Director Joan Clevillé said “The idea of the 'North' is different for everybody, depending on where you are geographically, and is also permanently elusive, as it always recedes as you move towards it. The North we describe in the piece is a place of the imagination, a liminal space in between places, somewhere between a limbo and a waiting room. There is definitely a Nordic feel to it, but it’s open, desolate and unpredictable. Rather than realistically describing one environment, which cinema is so good at, I am more interested in the human experience. I wanted to evoke a sense of disorientation, of being humbled by an environment that is stronger than us and that forces us to let go in order to survive.

I am thrilled to be coming back to Dance Base to present our second full-length production at the Fringe. It’s been amazing to continue our collaboration with the team of artists that created Plan B for Utopia. Our followers will recognise the playfulness and versatility of our performers, but this new work has an intriguing, almost cinematic feel, that we hope will take audiences on a completely different journey”. Joan Clevillé Dance is an independent dance company based in the city of Dundee, Scotland. Led by Artistic Director Joan Clevillé, the company’s practice is rooted both in movement research and experimentation with theatre and storytelling, challenging the conventional boundaries between genres. The company aims to create intimate works that are honest, original and thought-provoking, inviting audiences to share the performers’ enquiry about themselves, each other, and the world we live in. Joan Clevillé Dance Company will also be performing their acclaimed Plan B for Utopia at Pleasance Two, Pleasance Courtyard 21st – 27th Aug as part of Made In Scotland Showcase and British Council Edinburgh Showcase.

from the vileblog http://ift.tt/2stzJNc

#Theatre #Blogger #visual art #Edinburgh Fringe #Experimental Critique

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