#and I would have not survived a truth or dare I'm telling you

[selh0ve]

[hoshinasblade]

i woke up sad today and im also super stressed at work so im taking it upon myself to make other people miserable too, hence this drabble -

"it has to be me", hoshina declared, in a tone that reflected his strong will. "if number 10 wanted me to use it as a weapon, i'll do it." regardless of the consequences, he intentionally omitted. he didn't need everyone in the room to hear what is already a known fact.

the emergency meeting lasted 10 minutes, and as soon as it concluded, the oak doors opened with a loud bang, the high-ranking officers of the anti-kaiju defence of japan pouring out. hoshina soshiro, the vice-captain of the third division remained on his spot, unmoving. "hoshina -" captain ashiro approached him with a concerned look.

"commander, don't look at me like that", hoshina responded, a smirk on his face. captain ashiro would have complied, but she's known her vice-captain for year to see when he's faking confidence. "i'm tough to kill", hoshina said, dismissing himself.

retiring to his quarters, hoshina relished the small privilege he was given - it would be embarrassing to break down in front of other people if he was sharing a dorm room with his teammates. he laid down the mattress, the soft surface giving in to his weight. he did not bother to take his uniform off.

it was an hour or four before he decided to do something. the clock read past 10 pm. you're probably taking a shower. he took his chances.

you always pick up. and tonight was no different. even the mere sound of your breathing was sufficient to set his insides afire. "i miss you."

it's ridiculous even for him to realize that his feelings could be summarized in three one-syllable words. he closed his eyes, imagining that he was not holding his phone in his ear, that you were with him instead. your presence would effectively solve the majority of his problems.

"how was your day?" you whispered softly. if hoshina concentrates hard enough, he could see your lips part while you're talking. the hole in his chest grew more and more by the second.

"they're converting number 10 as a weaponized suit. they're making me wear it." hoshina wished he was not speaking to you about this.

"isn't that dangerous?" your reply was quick and straightforward. you were familiar with the protocol and you weren't even an officer.

"i could die." once the truth was out of his mouth, there was no stopping it. "it could significantly shorten my lifespan if i use the suit too much."

hoshina had always been proud of his skills as a competent swordsman - he's survived and made it this far with his blades despite most people advising him to give up. he's never cursed his own lack of power until now. if only he was strong enough, maybe he wouldn't need a suit to be able to fight better.

"then -" you started but paused and hoshina could tell you were steadying yourself. . "then don't use it too much", you suggested. in normal circumstances he would smile at you - flattered that you are worried about him, pleased that you care. but now everything from you simply feels like tiny crumbs of affection, and hoshina settled on being a beggar.

"would you cry for me when i die?" hoshina heard you gasp on the other line.

"i'm hanging up now", you exclaimed without saying goodbye. the silence after that was deafening, but even then hoshina kept his phone on the side of his face, listening. "i wanna see you tonight", you spoke at last.

"would it make a difference?" his voice cracked but he didn't care. he was exhausted of pretending he was doing alright without you, in making himself believe that his love reaches you where his hands couldn't.

he said your name once more and it felt like a knife was being twisted within him.

"don't you dare do this to me," you threatened. "wait for me there, okay?" you added this time, pleading.

hope is a greedy, grasping thing and hoshina soshiro let it take hold of him fully.

"i will."

[mj-iza-writer]

Part 2 for the recent story where Whumper gets Whumpee back through questionable methods. Requested by @valravnthefrenchie

Whumpee snuck out of their room and cautiously slank down the hall. They would be in big trouble if their nurse or guard caught them sneaking out of the room while they were still healing.

Every hallway they came to, they carefully peered around the corner.

"What are you doing?"

Whumpee nearly jumped out of their skin. They had been caught.

They turned slowly and looked up.

"Master, I... uhm, was looking for you", Whumpee smiled weakly.

"Funny I was also looking for you, but you were not where you were supposed to be", Whumper sighed, "so now tell me the truth. What are you doing?"

"My uhm puzzle Master. I was wondering if it was still out, or if someone put it away. I haven't seen it in a few months", Whumpee frowned, "I'm sorry, I'll go back to my bed."

Whumper nodded, "it's still where you left it. I asked them to leave it for you to work on when you came home."

"You really did plan on me returning then?", Whumpee looked at them strangely.

"Yes", Whumper nodded, "it was always planned that you would return home. I just didn't know when. They wouldn't have dared killed you, not with what they wanted me to do."

Whumpee nodded.

"Alright back to bed with you", Whumper started to usher them back down the hall.

"I can't see it?", Whumpee looked at them sadly.

"Nope, because I know you will start working on it", Whumper frowned, "let's get back before your nurse sees you stan... uh oh."

"What?", Whumpee turned and went pale.

"Why...are... they out of bed?", the nurse rushed toward them red in the face. "You are fighting a high temperature still with that infection, and you are out of your room", they glared at Whumper.

"Don't look at me like that", Whumper threw their hands up in surrender, "I told them the same thing and was trying to get them to go back."

Whumpee grinned, "my great Master... afraid of a nurse?"

"Don't mess with nurses Whumpee", Whumper smiled back, "now go on, your puzzle has waited this long. It will survive a few more days."

Whumpee looked back at their nurse, "I'm sorry, I'm coming right now."

"You bet you are. You shouldn't even be up right now. You were napping when I left your room a few minutes ago", the nurse followed Whumpee down the hall, continuing to lecture them.

Whumper watched them until they were out of sight. They chuckled as they turned to go back to their office.

Whumpee winced as their nurse unbandaged their back.

"The doctor is going to come and check this for you. I'm going to clean it right now", their nurse sat on the edge of the bed.

"Does it look any better?", Whumpee moaned as their nurse gently ran a cloth along their back. It itched so much and they were not allowed to touch anything.

"That feels so good", Whumpee slowly blinked contently.

"It's not as bright red as it was, but it's still badly infected", the nurse sighed, "this is one of the worst cases I've seen of an infected wound. It would have been nice that you had gotten first aid from that Tyler, but even then this wouldn't have been helped. You've been fighting this for a very long time. No wonder you were so tired and weak."

Whumpee nodded, "please can you just scratch it a little for me... please?"

"I unfortunately can't. It would do it worse to scratch. It will become more itchy and cause you to want to scratch more. You could also hurt it more", the nurse frowned, "it's best not to scratch."

"It's torture, I'm tired of laying on my stomach also", Whumpee frowned.

"I know dear, and I'm sorry. I know it is hard for you to sit still, but we have to do what's best", the nurse rubbed their head gently, "soon though you will be able to get up and do things again. Just not right now."

Whumpee sadly nodded.

Whumper followed the doctor into the room and sat down by the window. They just wanted to hear what the doctors' thoughts were on the infection and why it was lasting so long. They had been growing more and more concerned over their dear pet's health.

"How does it look doc?", Whumper tried to break the silence of the room.

"Still infected, but we have some control over it now. It's not spreading anymore and is receding slowly", the doctor lifted Whumpee's shirt a little more, "overall I am pleased with how this is healing."

"Is it normal that it's taking so long though?", Whumper frowned.

"It can be normal. They have had this for a fairly long time. We are giving it what it needs and the body is dealing with it properly as well", the doctor frowned, "Whumpee's body went through a lot during the last few months. This isn't the only thing their body is healing. Their body is using a lot of its resources to heal and recuperate. That's why it is important to rest, continue on the diet that I set for you, and take the medicine. Everything is important to making sure your body has what it needs to heal."

Whumpee sighed, "so I still have to be in this bed?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so", the doctor laid their shirt down again, "I know you've been getting restless, but we can't push your body. You don't have the energy to spare for it."

Whumpee sighed sadly, "I'm so bored, and I'm so tired of laying here."

"I'm sorry Whumpee, unfortunately if we don't do what your body needs you will be sick for a long time", the doctor patted Whumpee's shoulder, "all other vitals seem to be doing great. Is there anything else that needs to be checked?"

"No", Whumpee whispered, "unless you can scratch my back for me... it's so itchy."

"I can not do that unfortunately, but I'll see if there is an ointment we can apply to relieve some of that."

"I would love that", Whumpee nodded.

"Whumper can I speak to you outside of the room", the doctor frowned.

Whumper stepped out into the hall with the doctor.

"You know I can only heal them physically right?", the doctor crossed their arms in frustration.

"Yes", Whumper frowned, "what do you mean?"

"They are depressed... I can imagine them having some PTSD from what they just went through as well. I can only heal them physically, but if their brain and heart remain unhealed they will get sick and in a way that I can't help with."

"So what should I do for them", Whumper frowned, "I want my dear one back. I'd do anything."

"Well I advise finding some form of therapy that can help them through this, and finding a way to entertain them."

Whumper nodded, "okay that sounds manageable."

Manageable now meant some poor soul was now tied up in the backseat of one Whumper's people and on the way to Whumper's compound.

"Where am I being taken?", the person questioned.

"You'll see", Whumper's employee answered.

"I'd rather not", they sighed.

Whumper looked up as their employees guided a person into their office.

"Is that the therapist?", Whumper grinned.

"Yes", they chuckled as they sat the person down, "they are a highly rated psychologist from what sources show. Perfect for what you need them for."

"Would someone tell me what the heck is going on", the person looked around, "where am I, and who are you?"

"My name is Whumper... you're currently sitting in my office in my compound", Whumper leaned back in their chair.

"Wh-Whumper? As in...?", they made a petrified face.

"The very one... I'm afraid I need your services", Whumper smiled.

"My, uh... my services?"

"Yes... you are about to meet someone very dear to my heart. They just came back from a kidnapping that lasted for a good several months. Their doctor says they are in good health, but is concerned with their mental health and heart health. The doctor recommended a therapist to help Whumpee. They seem depressed and has some PTSD as I understand it. I only want the best for them."

"So yo-you need me to help them... I can... yeah I can help. Mostly cause of the things I heard about you", they frowned, "how long.... how long do you think you'll need me for?", they pulled out their phone, "I'll ask staff to reschedule patients for me."

"Oh no worries... you'll live here now. Just like the doctor and nurses, that way I have easy access to you. Your payment will be all of your needs being met, and plus your life will be spared", Whumper snapped their fingers.

One of the employees took Caretaker's phone and threw it to Whumper.

"Live here.... now?", they frowned, "but."

"You unfortunately do not get a say... end of discussion", Whumper frowned as they set phone on the desk.

"My family?", the person frowned.

"Sources show you don't have one", someone spoke from behind.

They sighed.

"Hmm", Whumper chuckled, "what is your name?"

"Caretaker", they frowned, "I really have nothing to say that will change your mind?"

"Nope", Whumper stood, "shall we meet some of your new friends, then Whumpee... and we will get you settled in."

Caretaker gulped, but nodded.

They stopped by Whumpee's room, but their nurse quickly kicked them out as Whumpee had just fallen asleep.

"Sorry you'll be able to meet them later, this here is your room", Whumper opened one of the doors in the hall, "you'll find it comfortable."

"Are those my things?", Caretaker stared at boxes and suitcases.

"Yes. Oh good I didn't know they did that already", Whumper grinned.

"The compound has a lot of things to see. If you look up you'll see guards everywhere. They see you as well, you will not get far if you try to escape."

Caretaker almost cried after the face the doctor made when they were introduced.

"I'll leave you to it then. I'll come back when Whumpee wakes up", Whumper turned to leave.

The doctor followed them out.

"You said you weren't kidnapping anymore", the doctor whispered angrily at Whumper in the hall.

"You said yourself that I needed to have a psychologist see Whumpee. I can't take Whumpee to appointments, not with my lifestyle. You have been here long enough to know better. Whumpee is important to me, and if you felt this was someone that we needed to have here, then it needed to be done. If there's a problem, I can call a guard in here to straighten it out for you."

"No, that's not necessary", the doctor spoke through gritted teeth.

"Perfect. Show them around and tell them about this place", Whumper smiled, "you know I'm not as bad as I could be."

"Just because it could be worse.... doesn't mean it's okay", the doctor turned to go inside.

Whumper chuckled as they walked away.

Inside the room, the doctor turned to a few nurses and Caretaker.

"You can blame me for you getting kidnapped. They have another hostage named Whumpee, who has severe Stockholm syndrome, PTSD, and depression. They just got back from being kidnapped for several months. I want Whumpee to get better, and I forgot who I was talking to", the doctor frowned, "I am so sorry."

"What am I supposed to do then?", Caretaker frowned.

"Play along... do not trust anyone outside of this room.... not even Whumpee. They are so badly conditioned. Just do the job needed, and do not get into trouble. Whumper will dispose of those they do not need. If you value your life, don't step out of line."

"How do we get out of here?", Caretaker frowned, "how do you escape?"

"We don't", a nurse stepped forward and sadly replied, "right now the goal is to survive and pray."

Caretaker looked at the doctor sadly and nodded.

The doctor didn't trust Caretaker enough yet to tell them there may be a plan soon, but it was in the early stages. Honestly, only a guard and the doctor knew of the plan.... those were the only ones who needed to know right now.

Caretaker was taken to Whumpee's room by a guard.

Whumper sat next to the bed talking with Whumpee when Caretaker was brought in.

"Well hello Caretaker", Whumper smiled, "meet your new favorite patient."

Whumpee turned to look.

Caretaker almost gasped when they saw Whumpee and their back.

"It's okay, you can come closer", Whumper frowned, "we won't bite."

"Sorry I was... surprised by their back", Caretaker tried to fake a smile.

Whumpee looked down sadly.

"Yes, the doctor is working on it. We both hope it will heal soon", Whumper nodded as they patted Whumpee's head.

"I'll leave you to it", Whumper stood, "the guard will sit in and make sure you don't pull any funny business. I'm trusting someone very special into your care, so please take care of them."

Caretaker nodded and watched Whumper leave.

Whumpee shyly watched them sit down.

"Are you here to help my back heal faster?", Whumpee whispered.

"No, not for that", Caretaker said with late frustration in their voice, "I guess you have been displaying signs of depression and things like that. So what's going on? Your a...your Master is concerned."

Whumpee looked down sadly, having heard the frustration, "I'm sad and bored", Whumpee sighed, "ever since I was brought home, I've been trapped in bed."

"I see", Caretaker nodded.

"I miss my puzzle.... I was kidnapped and forced to be tied up for several months. Blindfolded and noise canceling headphones. A lot of things happened to me while there, some of which I don't feel comfortable talking about. I looked forward to coming home and being free to be able to do what I wanted, but I still feel trapped", Whumpee sighed, "but doctor says I have to rest, so I have a nurse or a guard in here all of the time, but they won't talk to me all of the time, and Master is busy. I just want...", Whumpee stopped talking.

Caretaker wanted to hate this person so bad.... this was why they were here, but they seemed so sweet. Caretaker's heart melted.

"You just want to be loved right?", Caretaker smiled.

Whumpee smiled weakly and nodded.

Whumper came back after a while and pulled Caretaker out into the hall.

"What are you thinking? What can be done?", Whumper actually seemed to be concerned.

"They seem to feel lonely. Those that are in there watching them are not interacting with them enough. They want interaction and love", Caretaker frowned, "I can help with that if you'd like. I'll stay with them throughout the day so they can get the interaction. The nurse and guard can do what they need to do with them. I can entertain them."

"That sounds good, but you will be under watch to make sure you aren't doing anything against the contract. You'll get a bullet between the eyes if you are found guilty", Whumper pointed gun fingers at Caretaker, "am I clear?"

"Crystal clear", Caretaker nodded, "can I be dismissed so that I can prepare some things and also talk to their doctor on care plans."

"Yes you may", Whumper nodded.

Caretaker went back into the med room where the doctor was working.

The doctor and nurses turned and looked at them.

"We need to get them out of here", Caretaker whispered, "we need to get out of here as well."

"We know", the doctor nodded, "they melted your heart didn't they?"

Caretaker nodded quickly.

"Same as us", the doctor nodded, "welcome to the team."

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all.

@villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived

@sacredwrath @porschethemermaid

@monarchthefirst @generic-whumperz

@bloodyandfrightened @freefallingup13

@notpeppermint @cyborg0109

@idontreallyexistyet @painfulplots

@whumpbump @everythingsscary

@skittles-the-whumpee @expressionless-fr

@theforeverdyingperson @legendarydelusiongoatee

@candleshopmenace @whumpanthems

@lavndvrr @ivymyers

@starfields08000 @a-living-canvas

@lumpofsand @watermeezer

@indigoviolet311 @whumpy-mountains

@3-2-whump @risk606

@electrons2006 @paperprinxe

@whumprince @kaz-of-crows

@mis-graves @decaffeinatedtimetraveler94

@sausages-things @clevah-girlboss

@isikedmyself878 @daffyduckcommittedtaxfraud

@valravnthefrenchie

[buddierecs]

aly's favourite fic's

this is a list of my all time favourites buddie fics :) it will be a mixture of ratings. please check the rating/tags!

let's hear it for the boy by hattalove (anything by this author is incredible!!!!) "in which eddie attends a self-empowerment group for gbtq men to supplement his therapy, and is empowered to: forgive himself, say "i'm gay" to his own reflection in the mirror, accidentally adopt an adult, make fried rice, and tell his straight best friend that he's in love with him. not necessarily in that order." word count: 56k rating: teen and up audiences important tags: self-discovery, coming out, friends to lovers, pining, gay disaster!eddie diaz.

leave the light on (i'll be coming home) - highly highly recommend this!!!!! by: HMSLusitania "an accident on a call leaves buck with custody of chris after eddie is... missing presumed. while they navigate their new family circumstances -- and fight to stay together, despite eddie's parents' best efforts -- a john doe wakes up in a coma ward with no memory of his own life beyond the knowledge he has a son named christopher and, somehow, he needs to get home." word count: 44k rating: mature important tags: presumed dead, grief, mourning, angst, amnesia, getting together a leaf falls on loneliness by: iimpossible_things "buck doesn’t think that if he were to say, “i’m in a bad place”, that anyone would turn him away. really, he doesn’t. the 118 has too many good, kind people for that. but every time he wants to open his mouth, to say something, to reach out to eddie or bobby or hen or chim, he hears eddie yelling, “you’re exhausting.” —you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting— so each day he does his job and he laughs and he jokes and he pretends he’s the care-free goofball he’s always been. And each day he packs away his bruises and his worries, takes them home to his empty loft with its quiet rooms, and licks his wounds in silence." word count: 11k rating: not rated important tags: angst, fluff, happy ending, orginal male character and i'm not good at winning fights anymore by: spaceprincessem "five times buck needs to feel eddie's heartbeat and the one time eddie needs to feel his" word count: 24k rating: teen and up audience important tags: 5+1 things, whump, protective!eddie diaz, getting together, soft boys in love, ptsd i know you're hurting (but so am i) by: justhockey "eddie understands better than maybe anyone else ever could, how it feels to have everything unravel in the palm of your hands. he knows frustration - he knows fury. he’s painfully familiar with that burning rage that crackles in the tips of your fingers, that makes your skin hot and chest tight, and makes you want to punch anyone that dares to even look at you. but that doesn’t give chim the right to lay a damn hand on buck" word count: 3.7k rating: not rated important tags: ptsd, feelings realisation, protective!eddie diaz, communication, 5x04 coda good pretender by: likeshipsonthesea "an au where buck broke up with taylor before 5b, ravi and buck become (actually platonic) friends with benefits, and ravi, eddie, and buck all go on a journey of self-discovery that ends with them all getting what they need" word count: 85k rating: explicit important tags: friends with benefits (buckandravi), casual sex, childhood tramua, healing, feelings realisation, jealous!eddie diaz, ptsd, love confessions, anal sex

the best life is the truth (my best mask is my face) by: letmetellyouaboutmyfeels the buckleys are celebrating their 50th anniversary, and maddie and buck are both expected to come. to take the heat off maddie, buck impulsively blurts out that he's seeing someone new. obviously, there's only one solution: bring eddie as his fake boyfriend, pretend to be in love with him, and survive the weekend with minimal bloodshed. no problem, except for the, uh. "pretend" part." word count: 43k rating: explicit important tags: fake dating, idiots to lovers, there was only one bed, eventual smut

tomorrow will always and forever now be today (tomorrow is our always and forver) by: withmeornotatall "eddie gets trapped in a time loop on the day buck marries natalia" word count: 43k rating: mature important tags: time loop, minor buck/natalia, heavy angst, eventual happy ending, weddings, love confessions winter prayer by: daisies_and_briars "when a work conflict prevents athena from accompanying bobby to minnesota for the ten year anniversary of his family dying, buck and may offer to go instead. over the course of the trip, they all learn more about each other, and bobby faces his grief." word count: 18k rating: general audiences important tags: road trip, family bonding, grief, healing, angst, bobby being a dad to may and buck, may and buck are siblings

what a heart can do by: bvckandeddie "in which buck becomes the guardian of the daughter he never knew he had. together, they discover what happiness truly means to them." word count: 128k rating: teen and up important tags: girldad!buck, slow burn, friends to co-parents to lovers, oblivious!evan buckley, therapy, light angst, emotional hurt/comfort

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Just had the wild realisation that I can write whatever I want here. This is a thing that I am allowed to do. I can scream into the void. I don't have to tag my posts. Grammar is a social construct. It doesn't matter who's listening. The people I love and who love me will talk to me posts or no posts. Someone's going to read this and smile. Even if it's just me.

I can watch only the finales of shows to see their happy endings. I can eat cornflakes in the afternoon. I can go into bookstores just to creepily stare at the hardcovers of Victorian literature. I can write meticulous notes for subjects I'm not studying, and highlight it to Pinterest perfection. I can tell people I want to bite them out of sheer love. I can write long emails to my friends about weird slippers that remind me of them.

I can tell you that it's been a hot year, the hottest one to date, and that April hasn't seen a single drop of rain fall onto the earth. But it's hanging in the air, making it heavy with moisture and that relentless, relentless heat. It's muggy and the swamp theme I chose for my bullet journal couldn't be more appropriate. I can tell you how I keep singing that song in my head, Corner Of My Sky, the one whose music video has Michael Sheen wrangling with an occult toaster. "The rain, the rain, the rain, thank god the rain."

I can tell you anything I like. I can tell you that I'm afraid of being forgotten, that I've always longed to be famous, that I have a hard time not caring about every single little thing. I can tell you that I'm ace and I'm afraid that no one will ever love me the way I need them too, even if I love them the way that they need me to. I can tell you the nightmares have gotten better, but they're still there, they don't seem to want to leave me. I can tell you that I'm so much more ill and broken than I dare think about. Because I am afraid that if I start thinking about it, I shan't stop, and then it will become everything. And I don't want it to be everything. I can tell you that. I can tell you that I have beautiful memories, too, not just the fear and the loss and the anger.

I can tell you that I'm a performer, an entertainer, and I love making people laugh. I'm more comfortable on stage, where people are already listening, than trying to go up and make conversation to groups of strangers. I can tell you how wonderful it feels to have been able to speak to so many people all around the world, to have them know me, to listen to me, and to listen to them in turn. I can tell you that I don't know where to draw the line sometimes, I'm never entirely sure when I'm joking, and the act easily becomes a second skin. I can tell you all of that.

I can tell you all the things that I used to tell myself in letters sealed in envelopes addressed to Future Me. And it won't matter, and it does matter, and it's all so fucking absurd. It doesn't make any sense at all. Does it? I don't know. I can tell you that I don't know very much at all. Knock knock. Who's there? No one. No one who? No one who matters. Knock knock. I haven't been able to walk around for a month. This room is an oven and I'm being slow-cooked, broiled into a little Asmi pie. I read fanfiction yesterday after a long while. That was nice. I think it's really cool that you all know me. You do know me. Sometimes better than I know myself. I can tell you that.

I can tell you the truth. I can tell you I love you. And that to be seen and to be known is a gift that I will always be grateful for. I can tell you that you don't have to listen. But if you do, then hi! Nothing makes sense. Let's sit in the nonsense for a while. I have biscuits. Would you like one? I'm very human. It's one of the things that gets me so easily hurt. Maybe it happens to you too. I can tell you that my plant Crowley is surviving, unlike the others did. I can tell you that maybe you and I are, too.

It's 8:02 in the morning. I might just eat breakfast now. It does seem like the thing to do. How weird and wonderful that is.

[seraphiism]

𓆩 ♡ 𓆪 ┊ 𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

( do you love me enough that i may be weak for you? )

chara : xavier fandom : love & deepspace quote cr : alain de botton a/n : sorry but if i ever made contact with xavier looking at me like That i would burst into tears and then we might even make out or smth

& IN THE DELICATE RIFTS OF HUNTER VERSUS HUNTED, YOU HEAR SOMETHING RINGING IN YOUR EARS, FEEL IT POUNDING SO VICIOUSLY AGAINST THE HOLLOW OF YOUR RIBS. SOMETHING STRANGE BURROWS INTO THE ACHING OF YOUR CHEST, LINES ITS EXISTENCE INTO THE CREVICES OF BRUTALITY AND GENTLENESS. THEY'LL CALL THIS YOUR SURVIVAL, BUT YOU WILL CALL IT YOUR HEART.

the beating of the heart is a very primal thing, you realize. you place your hand against his chest. you listen. you count.

42. 48. 46.

you do not know why you always have to track the beats. maybe it's the touch that brings you comfort. maybe it's reassurance that here and now, he continues to exist by your side. maybe it's the need to know that despite all the injuries, he's okay, he's safe.

it's always the same, isn't it? this slow and steady means of living.

you close your eyes. count again. 49. 44. 45.

you open them, and for once, you dare meet his gaze. your mouth runs dry. you're always afraid to look at him; you seldom know why-- or so you think, but the truth is, you've always known.

"xavier," you murmur, and the space between your bodies is so far and few, "why do you look at me like that?"

you do not move your hand. something beneath it thrives in the presence of your warmth.

49. 49. 51.

xavier tilts his head slightly, that familiar trace of curiosity and kindness in blue eyes. a quiet smile falls upon his lips, and there is something so excruciatingly close to reverence and worship in it that it almost makes you want to cry, and you do not know why.

"like what?"

you stare. you stare and you stare, searching for something you yearn for but are so deeply frightened to discover. your lips part, but the words lodge themselves in your throat, unspoken, in dire need of release. you pause, swallow hard. he can tell you're struggling. his smile does not change, hand cupping your cheek ever so gently in silent means of it's okay, i'm here with you. and somewhere in that little gesture, there's the knowing that he'd wait until the end of time for you to speak if that's what you needed.

"i... don't know." you murmur, and the courage in your voice falters, decayed into absence. "like you could love me or something, i just--"

a moment, a beat, a spark.

your fingers grasp his shirt, tight. scared.

70. 78. 74. 88.

the beats grow faster. you do not break away from his gaze. you search and you search, looking for answers. you are not sure if you'll find what you're looking for, but in the way his smile grows just the slightest bit, and in the way his thumb grazes over your cheekbone, you are almost certain you understand what his heart calls for.

he leans in, just a little closer, lips just inches from yours.

you hear something beating, feel something beating, and you cannot tell whether it is your heart or his. your breath hitches, waiting.

a closed distance. a kiss to your forehead, your nose. you close your eyes at the sensation, letting out a shaky exhale.

"look at me."

his words are as soft as ever, and when you open your eyes, you sense a different kind of warmth in his. his thumb continues to trace over your skin-- a ghost of a touch, but more than enough.

"i do love you." xavier murmurs, and he presses his lips against yours, gentle, devout. "i love you, forever and always."

another kiss, endless. you are not sure who loses themselves in the other first.

you pull away, just barely, fingers clutching onto his shirt like a lifeline. you feel your cheeks burn, and you almost wish to tear your gaze away from his. but you don't. you smile, letting out a soft laugh before you kiss him once more.

"i love you too," you answer, "forever and always."

[violetduchess]

Muzan with a horrifically scarred reader? the reader's parents were overbearing, cruel and uncaring to reader, and when they put reader in a arranged marriage with Muzan for profit, reader tries to stand up for themselves... but ends up getting acid thrown in their face and body, making them wear a mask & long clothes to hide the permanent scars. Muzan doesn't know the treatment reader was given until reader fesses up when they first talk alone.

Scars to your Beautiful

Character: Muzan x reader

CW: angst, mentioned abuse, terrible parents, arranged marriage?

Note: I'm sorry it took so longs for me to get to this

In a world consumed by darkness and the allure of power, you, the reader, bore the visible remnants of a painful past. Your body, once unblemished, now carried scars that told a story of survival and strength. The world had not been kind to you, but you refused to let it define you.

You were born into a family plagued by cruelty and indifference. Your parents, driven solely by profit and social status, had arranged a marriage between you and Muzan. Their motives were selfish, for they sought to exploit Muzan's power for their own gain. You were nothing more than a pawn in their game.

But you, brave and determined, refused to succumb to their plans. You stood up for yourself, ready to defy their expectations and claim your own destiny. However, your defiance only fueled their anger. In a fit of rage and desperation, they resorted to an unspeakable act.

Acid was thrown upon your delicate flesh, searing your body and leaving behind permanent scars. The pain was excruciating, both physically and emotionally. Your once flawless visage was marred, and you became a prisoner of your own disfigurement.

As fate would have it, you found yourself face to face with Muzan. Trembling with both fear and vulnerability, you hesitated to reveal the truth of your past. Would he see you as damaged, tainted by your scars? Would he turn away in disgust?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the dimly lit chamber of Muzan's grand estate, you stood before him, your body concealed beneath layers of clothing and a mask shielding your face. Deep scars marred your once smooth skin, a painful reminder of the cruelty you had endured in your past. Your heart raced as you gathered the courage to reveal your truth.

"Muzan," you began, your voice quivering with a mix of anxiety and vulnerability. "There is something I need to tell you."

Muzan, who had always exuded an air of power and control, looked at you with curiosity and a hint of concern in his eyes. "What is it?" he asked, his voice a low, commanding rumble.

You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for his reaction. "These scars," you gestured to your covered body, "they are not the result of some accident. They were deliberately inflicted upon me."

Confusion flickered across Muzan's face, followed by a flicker of anger. "Who did this to you?" he growled, his voice laced with a cold fury.

"It was my own parents," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. "They were cruel, controlling, and saw me only as a tool for their profit. When I tried to stand up for myself, they threw acid at me, leaving me scarred for life."

Muzan's expression darkened, a storm brewing within his gaze. His fists clenched, betraying his simmering anger. "They dared touch what's mine?" he seethed, his voice laced with venom. He looked seconds away from finding them and ripping them to shreds.

You took a step forward, placing a hand on his arm to calm his rising rage. "It's in the past now," you assured him, your voice filled with a mix of resignation and determination. "But I wanted you to know the truth because...because I trust you."

Muzan's gaze softened as he looked down at you, his anger slowly subsiding. His eyes seemed to contemplate something, as if weighing the possibilities. A silence hung between you, thick with anticipation, as he processed your words.

After a moment, Muzan's expression changed, and he wore a thoughtful look. His features softened, revealing a surprising vulnerability. "You trust me," he echoed, his voice barely above a whisper with a slight edge of dark amusement. "Despite all I've done, you still trust me?"

You nodded, meeting his gaze with unwavering resolve. "I do," you affirmed, your voice filled with sincerity.

A mixture of emotions flickered across Muzan's face, an internal battle raging within him. Finally, he exhaled deeply, his shoulders relaxing as he made his decision. "Then, if you truly trust me, I offer you a choice," he said, his voice tinged with both certainty and determination. "You have the chance to become a demon, to gain immortality and power beyond human comprehension."

Your eyes widened, surprised by the unexpected offer. Becoming a demon was not a decision to be taken lightly, but it held the allure of leaving your painful past behind.

You took a moment to consider his words, weighing the risks and rewards that came with accepting his offer. The scars of your past had shaped you, but now, you had the chance to embrace a new existence, alongside the one who understood and cared for you.

"I accept your offer."

All rights reserved @violetduchess. All works of fanfiction belong to me, please do not copy, translate or repost any works without my express permission. Thank you.~☆

[animeyanderelover]

Could I request how it would be with indra,madara,Sakura,tsunade,Tobirama,itachi,naruto,Sasuke,shisui in a hunger games au?Thank you ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

I might have twisted a few points of the Hunger Games here and there to fit my storyline better. In general I'd like to say that I've never seen or read this franchise so all those informations are based on what I've been told from my followers or what I've read online. By the way, I accidentally added Hashirama in here since I'm so used to having him and completely overlooked that you didn't even requested him here.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, delusion, stalking, paranoia, clinginess, manipulation, blackmailing, poison, violence, torture, death, mentions of suicide, trauma

Hunger Games AU

Indra Otsutsuki

💜 As one of the highest officials even within the Capitol, Indra has always stood out. Not only because he's gorgeous but also because he hates the luxurious and shallow life most citizens in the Capitol lead. He has dedicated his life to overseeing the Peacekeepers, training them and brutally striking down anyone who dares to oppose the system. It makes him as feared as respected as the highly ranked officials in the Capitol do their best to keep Indra content so he will never turn against them as that would surely be fatal. Due to their fear and equal desire to keep a gem like him on their side, he has risen up to be one of the must influential and powerful humans in all of Panem with an army of Peacekeepers behind him. A lot of them from District 2 where Indra is worshipped as a god of some sorts. The Hunger Games have to be watched even if he thinks he could spend his time doing more important things, it's disgraceful to see people dying pathetic deaths due to their own incompetence.

💜 If someone would have ever told him that he would ever find himself falling for someone he only sees on TV, he would have flung them across the room. Yet this is exactly what happens during this year's game as you, an 18 year-old tribute from District 12, enter the games. Most other participants, especially the Career, are flashy and want attention to get supported and sponsored by other citizens. You stand precisely out because you don't draw any attention to you. You're calm, think ahead and it isn't your goal to try to be cool as you just try to do what you're supposed to whilst simultanously surviving. When nearly half of the tribute are already killed at the beginning whilst fighting for weapons and other important stuff in the Cornucopia, you instead decide to explore the region only to set a few traps later to steal everything other tributes collected. A bow and an arrow seem to be your favorite as you shoot opponents from a safe distance, silently waiting in a hidden spot.

💜 He can tell that you're experienced with hunting as you're excellent in hiding your own tracks whilst being a genius at following others. You even use the poison from muttations thrown in by the gamemakers to finish of your enemies even more efficiently. Someone who was forgettable at the beginning of the games has turned by the end of it into everyone's favorite as citizens are gushing over your smoothness and predator-like behavior. You have a lot of sponsors yet the first one who provided you with medicine and weapons was Indra. He's investing into you as he deems you to be someone who deserves to live. You're different from those incompetent and arrogant fools who are either too terrified or too cocky, you always approach everyone with the same amount of caution and fight seriously. Perhaps it is no one's surprise that you end up winning, the first champion of your district and the people love you. One specific person probably more than others.

💜 His desire for you shocks him as he's never met you in person, he's only seen you in the arena. Truth is though that you're everything he's ever searched for. Courageous, smart, strong and merciless when it comes to snuffing out a life. You're unaware of him until the day where he pays to see you, something that is allowed as he's from the Capitol and you're a mere attraction for those people. You walk in, completely expecting him to initiate sexual intercourse yet he's more interested in talking to you, seeing your skill with his own two eyes, scientifically modified with his own request to grant him even more power. The end result are permanently red eyes with black dots within his orbs which make him all the more intimidating. You're secretly just relieved that he doesn't want to violate you so you indulge him in his interest to see your abilities up close. If only you'd known what consequences that would have later on for you. It's never like you had a choice anyways...

💜 His obsession gets gradually worse as he gets to know you better. Your skills match your fast thinking and you're a quick learner as he suddenly starts training you in hand-to-hand combat and the use of other weapons. Slowly you start spending a lot of time with him until you find yourself staying days in his house as he provides a room for you. He grows possessive, sees it as such a terrible waste that you still have to stay in your District, even if it's in the Victor's Village. Thoughts fill his mind, wondering if he could convince the president to let you live permanently with him as Indra is almost as powerful as he is. Those dark thoughts turn into schemes yet it is when one of the Peacekeepers in the Victor's Village informs him that you recently took someone in who isn't your family but someone you fancy that a burning rage takes over him. The next time you're forced to come over, you instantly sense that something is wrong. It is only confirmed when you're grabbed by the man, red eyes gleaming as he smashes his lips against yours in a searing kiss, growling in between that you can't refuse him. You're his, he will see it through that you can never leave him.

Madara Uchiha

🌑 Madara is a Career from District 2 that will participate in this year's Hunger Games and to say that he's confident is an understatement. He's been training essentially his whole life for such a chance and in his last year before he would have been excluded from it, he's finally chosen. There are rumors if the Capitol might have manipulated the decision on purpose since Madara is quite well known even among the citizens of the Capitol for his skills and beauty. Truthfully spoken though, Madara doesn't care. He's just thrilled that he gets his chance to participate, to fight. His District has produced a lot of victors for the Hunger Games so this is about honor, especially since his own father is a previous victor from a game years ago. He can not let his family down like this. Madara is instantly the favorite among the crowd as soon as he enters, the cheers for him are deafening and a lot of tributes seem to give up instantly, recognizing him.

🌑 When he notices most of them cowering upon noticing him, avoiding his eyes and making themselves as small as possible, he can only scoff and give them a condescending look. He despises people like them, weak cowards. They're all going to die anyways. There's only one person who meets his gaze and refuses to look away, a sign of rebellion. A tribute from District 7, the same age as him. Both of you get caught in a silent stare battle as looking away or even blinking is a loss, something that both of you don't want. It's this first encounter between the both of you that not only sticks in Madara's memory as you're the first one to have challenged him so openly, but also makes you more memorable for the citizens. So you're the tribute he decides to keep an eye on for now but it's the fight around the Cornucopia that really earns you a spot in his memory and heart alike. Your strength from providing wood and lumber for the Capitol surprises and overwhelms almost all other tributes, even Madara.

🌑 Madara and you alike slaughter quite a few tributes until only both of you are left in the Cornucopia, staring at each other again. The adrenaline is still high yet both of you come to an agreement. You'll wait for this fight until you're the only two left. There's no doubt in Madara's mind that you'll survive to fulfill your promise and you think likewise. All viewers crave the same as both you and Madara receive lots of support, in your case an axe which becomes the weapon you slaughter all your enemies with. Even Careers fall ultimately when fighting you, the hardest fight up until Madara for you is the female Career from District 2 who is plenty skilled although you don't expect anything else if she comes from the same place as Madara. After a longer fight though, she succumbs to her injuries, her severed arm the main source as she has lost too much blood. When Madara and you meet again, both of you hold each other's gaze again...before one of the most spectacular fights unfolds itself.

🌑 You two go at it for hours as both of you possess a great amount of stamina, endurance and strength. There's no denial that both of you enjoy this fight to it's fullest though, you can even see Madara grinning, thrilled to have someone who can finally stand up to him. It seems inhumane, watching the fight between essentially two monsters. Both of you are so immersed in your own world where only you two and this fight exists that it's only when a loud announcement echoes through the arena, announcing both of you for some reason as victors of this year's games that both of you come back to reality. It turns out that the audience in the Capitol is absolutely enraptured with the both of you and has unanimously demanded for both of you to be named winners and the president saw himself forced to keep the citizens satisfied. Madara is in a way thankful though because if you two are alive, it means that you two can fight again. In a way you've completely won his heart with this fight.

🌑 It's never the same for him again after he's met you. You're special and talented, no one in his district can compare to you and that causes him to grow irritated. Luckily the Capitol is unable to forget about you two just as much and the demand for both of you to keep entertaining the citizens is high so both of you see each other often despite living in different districts. No words could describe just how excited Madara is about being able to see you as often as he does, focused on only you. If he has to take a spouse, he wants it to be you. He knows that it's technically not possible yet he senses soon enough that he isn't the only one who would want you two to be together. A good bunch of people in the Capitol love the romantic tension between you two and his growing possessive behavior so it dawns on him that he could use the foolish wishes of those people to his own advantage. Some people in the Capitol really start voicing their opinion that you two should marry since you are perfect for each other and you plan to announce that you don't have any interest, you're stopped by Madara. Hush, darling. Don't even try to stop something you have no control over.

Hashirama Senju

🌳 Hashirama and you alike are both from District 4, although his family lives in the Villager's District looking on how his father has won in his younger years the Hunger Games. That doesn't spare his children from being chosen as tributes though and it just so happens that Hashirama and you have been childhood friends since forever. His family is very close with yours so you're often allowed to come over and visit and train together as Careers. You know that Hashirama would do anything to spare you that fate though because even if his district sees it as an honor to add victors to their districts and stay wealthy and powerful among the other districts, Hashirama sees this entire game as rather cruel. He's always been empathetic as he watched so many young people dying for the amusement of others yet whenever he has voiced his opinions in the past, he has been scolded and punished by his parents. If the Capitol would find out after all, they might be killed.

🌳 Yet it is the cruelest irony when both of you get chosen as tributes to present your district for this year. Horror washes over his body as he clutches your hand tightly into his, sweaty and shaking ever so slightly. When he's shortly about to leave for the arena, his father advices him to not get all emotional and spare your life as there can only be one winner and those words haunt him and are the start of his breaking point. Obviously Hashirama doesn't listen to him as he sticks close to you the entire time, nervous and terrified for you instead of fearing for his own life. Both of you know that he's been in love with you for a long time now although you have asked him to give you time to think about it. His father knows about it too, the whole family does, that's why they're worried that Hashi will prioritize you over everything since he's an emotional fool. When all of you are presented to the viewers, he refuses to stray away from your side. Both of you catch the eyes of some people thanks to that.

🌳 They refer to you two as unfortunate sweethearts as Hashirama's love for you seems to earn you the favor and support of quite a few fans who are eager to see the development between you two. When both of you fight in the Cornucopia and Hashirama shields you and gets hurt in the process and you carry him around in desperate search of a hiding spot, you receive medicine and bandages from fans of you two who are positively gushing over the dedication between you two. This sickens you yet you have no choice but to accept the presents to help Hashirama who is busily soothing your guilt for him getting hurt because of you. You stay awake the entire night to let him rest, keep guard so that nothing and no one can attack him whilst he is so vulnerable. Both of you never separate once from each other during the entire game and the one time you suggested splitting up, Hashirama had a small meltdown, stopping you physically from leaving him.

🌳 Being part of the game and seeing himself forced to kill other participants breaks him and his psyche. Nightmares that always turn him into a whimpering mess who clings to your form and an emotional breakdown as soon as he thinks that he has lost you. He clings to you like his sanity depends on it and at this rate that is most likely the case. Whether it's luck or not, both of you find yourselves as the sole survivors by the end of it and Hashirama has killed a good bunch of them, something that still horrifies you even if you understand the rules of this game and that he only did it to protect you. There can only be one survivor though and you can only stare anxiously at Hashirama. He truly looks broken, dark rings under his eyes, bruises and cuts covering his face. His own tired gaze meets you and he musters a reassuring smile before embracing you. Terrified confusion turns into utter horror when he mumbles that he won't let you die, no matter what. Even if he has to commit suicide.

🌳 This revelation triggers shock and admiration alike within everyone in the Capitol, all of them loving the tragic love story. People crave a happy ending though so a lot of requests fly in to allow both of you to survive since you're from the same district. You're crying out in relief when the announcement is made or otherwise you would have knocked Hashirama out to stop him from doing anything stupid. Both of you return as victors to your district yet it wasn't worth the price you paid. Hashirama is traumatized with everything he has seen, glued to your hip and emotionally unable to accept you leaving him. You two move into a separate mansion in the Victor's Village, you would have most likely done that even without them telling you that you have to live together, apparently another sick fantasy of the Capitol. You despise all of them though because they've taken your best friend away from you and have ruined him into this anxious, clingy and delusional broken man in front of you who showers you excessively with his love and affection. Apparently that's what the people want though, you realize that with horror when you hear the rumors about an arranged engagement.

Tobirama Senju

🌊 Tobirama is within his lifetime the pride of his District 4 as he was barely 12 years old when he participated and won against everyone else, even if some of them were years older and had way more training as him. Tobirama is just naturally gifted and just happens to be your best friend as well. Something inside of him changed after he came back as the victor though. He never was all that much sunshine to begin with but he became harsher and way more merciless after he won the games. You can only imagine what he saw during his time as a player but when you try to ask him, he always puts you rudely down. He lives with his family in the Victor's Village where you are often visiting thanks to his influence. Instead of playing around and enjoying time together, now he starts training with you intensely though, reminding you harshly that you might get chosen one day too. It's jarring to see his transformation after the games.

🌊 You're 18 when you're chosen and shocked when you hear your name and even Tobirama is shaken but he flawlessly hides it behind the usual scowl sitting on his face. Needless to say that he becomes your official mentor since you're now the official tribute for this year. Expectations on you are high as all believe that with Tobirama as your mentor, you can not fail. Tobirama himself goes harsh on you now that you're going to participate in the Hunger Games. He's relentless and unforgiving, you pass out a couple of times since he does not allow you even a minute to take a break. Whenever you start begging him to stop, all you receive is a harsh lecture that you'll die as one of the first in the game if this is how you're going about it. Partially that is true, he knows that better than anyone else. However, Tobirama is also deep down very paranoid about the aspect of potentially losing you. All his rudeness aside, you're still very much his best friend and his first and only love. The later you don't know yet though.

🌊 The arena this year is close to the sea with a lot of beaches, rocks and cliffs and it's almost as if the Capitol is favoring those from District 4 with such an environment as they specialize in fishing and for that know how to navigate around such places. He watches this year's game with a lot more dread than he ever has. Whilst he is confident in your abilities, he knows that his district isn't the only one who produces Careers. Luckily for you and your fellow Career from District 4, the Cornucopia is placed on a small island within the sea which means that you either have to swim or build a boat. Unfortunately a lot of tributes lose early on their lives, underestimating what muttations swim around in the deep parts of the sea. You belong to the smarter ones who build a boat instead of risking to get eaten, go even as far as catch bait to keep those creatures under control in case they decide to assault your boat too. Sailing a boat is no problem for you.

🌊 The last part of the game is a never-ending train of death, fights and survival of the fittest as only the Careers are left and have to battle it out. You on the other hand go into hiding, stay close to the sea where using weapons will be for the most part very difficult, plus the fact that even Careers are careful to dive to deep into the water, considering the terror creatures the Gamekeepers have designed for this. You avoid the bloodbath for the biggest part, until only you, the other Career from your district and one from the first one are left. This fight is gruesome as you gut your fellow Career out with a harpoon you snatched away in the Cornucopia and push the other one down the cliff, watching the shark-like muttations tearing them apart. When you're announced the winner, Tobirama can only slide down the chair, all tension leaving his body and leaving him exhausted. You've won. You survived and most importantly...you'll return to him.

🌊 He gives you genuine praise when you return, relieved that you were skilled and strong enough to survive everything. You get your own house in the Victor's Village, beyond grateful that you made it out of this living hell of a game. Unfortunately you don't get much of a break as soon afterwards, his family and your own family start talking about potentially engaging you two. Both of you won a game after all and are now praised as the best of the best among their district. His father is finally willing to see you as worthy for his son and your own father can allow himself now to demand high things from your future husband too. This disturbs you as you don't plan to marry Tobirama and you seek him out as soon as the topic is brought up in your family, naively thinking that he will respect your wishes. Instead you're met with overwhelming silence as soon as you've finished your earnest plead to him, red eyes scrutinizing you. Are you really that repulsed with the thought of marrying him? After he's trained you, mentored you, helped you survive the game? It's on that day that you realize for the first time just how much the Hunger Games can change a person, especially your best friend.

Tsunade Senju

🐌 Tsunade is one of the most well-known victors in all of District 4 as her grandfather as well as her great uncle were both legendary victors in the annual Hunger Games and she herself participated when she was 18 years old. Unfortunately for Tsunade though, she lost everything because of those games. Her brother, who had just freshly turned 12, was elected as one of the tributes. Young, optimistic and naive he saw it as an amazing chance to show to everyone, including his sister, that the Senju were a family of winners. He lost his life in an explosion though, the necklace the only thing left of him. During her own time as a tribute, Tsunade was forced to see her own lover die, who was in the same year chosen as a tribute. The mere thought that only one person would survive was mortifying as it was but when Danzo sacrificied himself for her, earning her as a result the favor of the crowd, she was shattered forever. All her hope and optimism gone and instead she spends her time with sake.

🐌 When you enter the Victor's Village as the freshest addition of that place, you already know about Tsunade, everyone knows. For a woman of her height she easily matches and often surpasses the strength of any men and is additionally very skilled with medicine and surgeries. Yet all other victors who live here warn you about her as she's turned into a bitter and lonely woman who refuses everyone's company. It's a shame for someone with a pretty face like hers, she's still such a young and attractive woman after all, only a few years older than you are. In a way you can not bring yourself to blame Tsunade though, not after you've gone through those games too and had to kill the other person from your district who you had actually gotten along with quite well. You just leave her be, even if her own house is right next to yours. You never engage in any rumors about her, even go as far as defending her when other victors talk down on her. She's after all still one of the greatest.

🐌 Your first encounter is certainly one you will remember as the good lady had a few drinks too much and stumbles into your house instead of her own, breaking your door in the process with her brute strength. You initially think of thieves when you see the broken door hanging out of it's door frame only to see the good Tsunade Senju herself sleeping in your bed. You're baffled for a good amount of time, confused to say at least about what you should do now before you decide to let her be and instead sleep downstairs on the couch. The next morning is awkward for the both of you as you have to explain to her that this is in fact your house, especially since she was about to deliver a good punch for thinking that this was still your house. She leaves with her head held high, apologizing for putting you through such a situation before she leaves with the slightest hint of pink dusting her cheeks. After that encounter, your relationship with her is never the same again.

🐌 Somehow she seems less hostile around you, most likely because she will never be able to forget about that accident. That has eased her up around you and so you two occasionally engage in small chats when you meet each other outside. That slowly evolves into meeting each other inside either your or her house and you feel honored that you're pretty much the only one who she has ever allowed inside her mansion. She has her own laboratory that was specifically built for her as the Capitol still demands her to invent new medicine since she is the best there is, even surpassing the scientists in the Capitol. She admits to you that she doesn't want to help the very same people who took everything away from her but she knows that they will threaten innocent people and only bother her more otherwise so she still does as she is told. You openly tell her how much you admire her for what she does and also express your compassion regarding her brother and lover.

🐌 You're a person Tsunade feels comfortable around, less lonely and miserable. She can talk with you about her pain without others talking their death little by calling them simply not strong enough. You're still human, you admit that the whole concept of the Hunger Games is sick and wrong. You give her solace and she starts yearning for that feeling, seeks you out more and more actively. Initially you don't object, you know how lonely and misunderstood Tsunade is. Eventually you recognize that her clinginess has become rather unhealthy though as she barely wants to separate from you and you spend most of your time in her house. She doesn't want you to spend any more time with those people outside who have traded their morals and human lives for fame and glory, wealth and riches. You're still a good person but most importantly, you're a person she has learned to love and cherish. She won't lose you again and if she has to poison your food and weaken you a bit, she will do so. Don't worry though, she would never risk your life. No, instead she will only sicken you a bit to be the one to nurse you back to health.

Shisui Uchiha

🍂The Uchiha family within District 2 is by far one of the most well-known families throughout the entire country of Panem since a lot of people from there have not only been chosen as tributes but also won those Hunger Games. Shisui is no exception to that as he was barely 13 years old when he entered the game and left the arena as a victor. His skills were so outstanding that he was in fact approached by some high officials from the Capitol and asked if he'd like to join the Peacekeepers of Panem, looking on how they trained already in his district. Shisui politely declined though although he in fact is allowed to watch them training and even acts as a teacher at times since his abilities surpass theirs far. Some people in the Capitol are at times terrified that Shisui might betray them though because if he would join any sort of rebellion, he could make it work. That's why they go to great lengths to keep him content with his life, although they are never able to figure out how he is really feeling.

🍂You're a close friend of Shisui even if you don't belong to his family. You're still from District 4 though but have never been made a player in the Hunger Games and are out of their age range by now. When you turned 19 years old, everyone celebrated your birthday as if it was the greatest day in your life and honestly, it was. Because it meant freedom and no fear for you anymore. You have obviously been trained as a Career just like everyone else but you would have never been able to survive out there, at least in your opinion. Even Shisui seemed off for a few weeks after returning, you still remember this hollow look in his eyes and the goosebumps across his skin when he hugged you despite the sun shining brightly, pressing you tightly against his own body. He never talks with you about it and a huge part you've seen on TV when it all aired but the camera wasn't focused every time on him. You just assume that Shisui wants to spare you from the unspoken horrors he went through.

🍂With him moving into the Victor's Village, a tradition for everyone who wins a Hunger Game, you find yourself spending less time with him. It's lonely without him since he's always been your best buddy, even if he still tries to make time for you as good as he can. Instead you are now more often alone, a little bit sceptical to make new acquaintances. That is until you meet a lovely group of people, one of them is in fact a neighbour of yours. All of them are around your age which means you don't have to fear that even one of them might lose their lives in such a cruel and useless game. You start to spend gradually more time with them but Shisui seems a little bit relieved that you have found new friends, considering how much you've blamed him for leaving you all to yourself at first. He admits briefly that he's a little bit busy at the moment, although he never explicitily states what he is doing. All you know is that he's doing something for the Capitol.

🍂After a few weeks of spending time with your new friends and just living your life without the looming threat of death, they start asking you about what you think of the Hunger Games. You're cautious ith your answer since you know that quite a few people in the second district see those games as a chance to prove to the Capitol that their district is the superior one. You still make it clear that you think it's cruel and unfair to throw essentially children into an arena and have them killing each other for the sick amusement for the richest of the rich. To your relief they agree with you and voice their clear dislike of the whole concept. What you gradually notice though is that conversations always shift to the games and soon you start talking about how one might stop those games and how to overthrow the Capitol. You initially entertain them with your own schemes and ideas, start feeling very uncomfortable soon though. When they notice though, they instantly revert back to doing something else.

🍂You're surprised when Shisui one day requests you to visit him and even more shocked when the first thing he does as soon as letting you in is forbidding you to spend anymore time with those people. He doesn't answer any of your questions but only insists that you have to stay away from them. His more bossy tone does not sit right with you. Who does he think he is, telling you not to spend time with your friends when he's barely there anymore? It's this rebellious streak that you give him that shifts something within him and just as you're about to leave his house, he is in front of you in the blink of an eye, slamming the door closed and staring at you with black eyes who appear to see right through you. You shrink, trying to escape from his gaze that is staring relentlessly at you. You break out in cold sweat when he asks you if you really want to know but find yourself still nodding. When he tells you that those people plan a rebellion against the Capitol and planned to recruit you and that he has been tasked to kill them, your blood runs cold. When you asks him quietly if he can really kill people again, he gives you a firm nod. Those are orders and on top of that, they promised him the one thing he's always wanted. You.

Itachi Uchiha

🍡 Another resident in District 4 who has been trained from a very young age on as a Career. Itachi is gifted, there is no denying his skills as he has risen up to the status of a genius from a very young age on. It's precisely due to his outstanding abilities that his father is secretly always hoping that Itachi's name will be chosen in the annual lottery to determine the next participants in the game. Year after year passes by though and his name never once appears. Perhaps a stress relief for the other Career within District 4 as they have zero confidence to win if Itachi would get chosen together with them. How does Itachi feel about this though? Well, he isn't much of a talker and stays silent most of the time when someone approaches him and wants to converse with him about the Hunger Games. He hides his unhappiness though as he would rather spend time with his little brother or with his darling instead of training hours and hours on end for the slim chance he might get chosen.

🍡 When he passes the age of 18 and is officially out of the register, his father is greatly disappointed whilst Itachi is just relieved that he can hopefully spend more time with Sasuke and you from now on. Unfortunately fate is not as kind as your name gets chosen that year, your last year of potentially being chosen. Terror freezes you in your place as your name gets chosen and the same silent horror seeps into Itachi's veins as he hears the news. You come running to him the same day, although he was planning to search for you just as much. You're crying your eyes out whilst in his embrace, terrified and scare out of your mind. You don't want to participate in the games! You don't! Seeing your tears and the hope already having left your body breaks his heart, fills his chest with a searing pain. When Itachi finds himself laying that night wide awake in his bed, an idea suddenly pops up inside his head and the next morning he approaches his father and asks if it's possible that he can take your place.

🍡 Technically it shouldn't be allowed since he's out of the age range but when his father notifies the people organizing the Hunger Games, they're very happy to make an exception for Itachi. He's skilled, he's handsome and they're sure that the citizens of the Capitol will be very happy to have him as a tribute. News quickly spread within your district about the change of plans and knock the air out of your lungs when you hear what a sacrifice Itachi made for you. Yet you can't accept it, approach him angrily with tears in your eyes as you lash out at him for doing something so stupid. He shouldn't have done this for you. You aren't worth it. You try to convince him to pull back, that he doesn't have to do this for you yet he just gently nudges you away, speaks with a soft voice that it's alright. It's too late now anyways, they won't let him slip away now that they have him finally in the games. You can only watch with an aching heart as he leaves for the Hunger Games.

🍡 You watch everything with your heart in your throat, horrified yet unable to avert your eyes from the game you watch safely from the comfort of your house as Itachi participates in your place. At times you feel almost glad that it isn't you when you see the gruesome deaths of the participants yet guilt fills you almost instantly after as you realize that it's because Itachi risks his life instead of you yours. When Itachi stands as the last one and wins, no one in your district is surprised and instead they celebrate him. Only you sit there, devastated that you forced Itachi, who never wanted to kill tributes, into this living hell. When he returns and is brought to the Victor's Village, you try to avoid him. You see the broken glimmer inside his eyes, the burden he took because you were too much of a coward and it is too painful for you to witness. You don't deserve someone like him. You spend the following weeks away from him, ignore all letters and attempts he does to reach out to you.

🍡 After a few months have passed by and Itachi's attempts to reach out to you have stopped, you've slowly attempted to get back on track with your life. Itachi's absence has left a hole though, one you try to ignore since you made that decision. Your life isn't good but you try your best to do the best to make it acceptable again. Until one day a few Peacekeepers suddenly storm your house, arrest you and the rest of your family for no reason and you're separated from them. You don't know where they plan to take you, at least until you see the Victor's Village in the distance where you're thrown into one of the houses, the doors shut behind you. When you look up from your position on the floor, you're met with Itachi's black eyes. He's standing a few feet away from you, his face unreadable yet there's cold fury in his eyes. What do you expect? You betrayed him in a sense, left him alone when he would have needed you the most. Do you even know what he went through during this game? Your apologies barely do anything nor does your pleads to help you with your family. At least not for free this time. You can only stare at him with horror when you hear those words. What have you done?

Naruto Uzumaki

🍜 Naruto Uzumaki is from the twelfth district, the poorest district in all of Panem. He's an orphan whose parents have unfortunately died when he was really young due to the poor conditions such as minimal food. A lot of people in their village suffer under the dictatorship of the Capitol and they barely produce any winners for the Hunger Games as they lack the resources and the training to train the young children such as the wealthy districts do. So when one of their tributes miraculously wins the Hunger Games, only the tender age of 14 years, hope returns once more to the people that for at least the next year, the Capitol will provide them with enough food and supply them what they need. When the winner returns to the village, they're hailed and celebrated like they're the incarnation of a godly being themselves, so dire was the daily life before they won. It's been years since someone from their district has won after all. They move into the Victor's Village with their family soon after.

🍜 4 years later, Naruto gets chosen as a tribute for the Hunger Games, clinging to his hope that he has a chance to win if he works hard enough to win and help all the people in his village who suffer from the lack of food and water. There's also a bit of giddy excitement though to meet you, the very same champion who won 4 years ago and is even the same age as he is. You haven't been here that often ever since you were able to move into the Victor's Village but the stories about you have never really stopped. Such an impact left your victory on the people, the first one in over two decades. Naruto actually recalls that he knew you before you were chosen as a tribute but when he sees you again, he feels like he's meeting a completely new person. No wonder, you're famous now after all. He feels flattered when you actually recognize the blonde-haired boy too, point out that he surely has grown up. You do warn him that you won't go easy on him or otherwise he won't make it.

🍜 Training with you is surely tough as you force him through hours and hours but you admire that he never gives up and insists on doing something over and over again until he's got the hang of it. He's optimistic, painfully much so, and you wonder at times if that is a farce to keep himself motivated or if he truly thinks he has a shot. When you ask him, he manages to flatter you when he answers that you've given him and everyone else a lot of hope with your victory. The time you have to train him isn't that long yet you too grow quite close to each other during that period, most likely because of Naruto wanting to get to know you better. He's quite a fanboy, blue eyes admiring everything you do and somehow that feels nice. You're anxious when he leaves since you've grown attached to him and he's grown even more attached to you. You can only pray now as your one eye that you didn't lose during the games is glued to the screen when the tributes enter this year's arena, a forest.

🍜 Naruto is anxious and nervous when he enters the arena but he tries to do his best to stay optimistic throughout it all. His friends are watching him, you are watching him and this is a chance to help everyone in his district. Unfortunately his optimism gets shattered during the games. He knew that he would witness multiple bloodbaths but nothing could have prepared him for the real deal. His blue eyes grow dull as the game goes on and his hopeful smile leaves his face the more he is confronted with the ugliest side of humanity. It breaks your heart to see him although you can fully understand that no one would be able to stay happy after this hell of a hell. It's the finale of the game that mortifies you though as the other tribute from your district gets killed right in front of Naruto's eyes and the Career makes fun of them. Silence as blue eyes are glued to the mutiliated corpse before something just snaps and Naruto enters a frenzy, an outburst that makes him the victor as he kills the other survivors.

🍜 You wait for him in the Victor's Village, a shell of what he used to be with hollow and empty eyes. You do your best to take care of him, keep him hydrated and see through that he eats as Naruto sits otherwise just around, blue eyes staring into the emptiness. It truly shatters your heart and you do your best to help him to heal as good as you can and slowly he starts responding to you. Sad eyes are always following you around and soon you have him trailing behind you like a little duckling. You're too glad that he has started reacting again to notice the alarming signs that you're feeding him into an unhealthy and delusional obsession. You've always been there for him, haven't you? You've sacrificed even more than him since he didn't lose any eyes or limbs. It makes him wonder how much pain you still carry around inside of you and it's that thought, the idea that he should help you to heal too, that fully pushes out the grin out of him again. A smile to cheer you up. Initial happiness soon turns into dread when you finally come to realize that Naruto has lost his sanity in those games, his broken mind viewing you two as soulmates since both of you have gone through the same hell.

Sasuke Uchiha

💙 Sasuke and you have been childhood sweethearts for such a long time now, Mikoto adores the two of you together just as much as your mother does. Both of you were born in the second district which means that you two live a rather good life in comparison to most other districts, looking on how District 2 is one of the wealthiest districts among the 12. It also means that the both of you are trained from a very young age to be Career and potential tributes from the Hunger Games when you're old enough. You know that the pressure is big on Sasuke as he is from the Uchiha family who is generally known to have created a lot of champions in the Hunger Games. His own brother is hailed as one of those victors who has won the games at the age of 14 and that has led Sasuke to become visibly more bitter and greedy for power as he spends hours training relentlessly. You're one of the few people he is still occasionally showing his soft spot, although he has also demanded that you spend a lot of time with him.

💙 Both of you are 17 when somehow both of you get chosen as tributes and both of you are aware what that means. A shiver goes through you and when Sasuke clutches your hand tightly in his own, clearly stressed by this sudden turn of event, you know that both of you are screwed. You more so than Sasuke since he's talented whilst you're not. You're not bad but certainly not good enough to win this game and silently you might have already resigned yourself to the fact that you'll die. That is until Sasuke grabs you and drags you harshly to a place where no one can hear you two and tells you that you'll stay close to him during the entirety of the game. You want to protest but his dark eyes leave no room for a discussion and you silently nod, decide to listen to him. You spend the little bit of time you have left training with him and you can tell that he goes very hard on you as you receive bruise after bruise with him snapping at you that you need to focus more. You sense that he's scared for you though.

💙 Starting from when you enter the arena to be presented to the citizens of the Capitol, Sasuke keeps a sharp eye on you and an additional arm around you, glaring at everyone who does as much as glancing at you. When the fight in the Cornucopia begins, you realize very much just what hell behind the hell you'll have to endure as all tributes start fighting and slaughtering each other mercilessly to gather the weapons and supplies inside the building. Sasuke gets his hands on a katana and that's when pretty much everyone else is already screwed as he flawlessly starts slaughtering him, the blade of his weapon cutting through flesh with blood splittering his clothes and his face. The only ones who survive are the ones that are fast enough on their legs and a part of you wants to run away from him too when he turns around to you, covered in blood and far too calm considering what he just did, instead asking you if you're alright. You can only swallow back the lump in your throat and nod.

💙 You're able to collect a lot of stuff in the Cornucopia since everyone else fled when they saw Sasuke and his skills with the sword, the way he almost danced whilst killing everyone else. You should be glad that he's on your side and you are but at the same time you're frightened out of your mind. You never knew that Sasuke could murder so many people at once without feeling an ounce of guilt and dread pools deep inside your stomach when you think about what might happen at the end if you two are really the only ones left. With Sasuke on your side, you survive easily as he continues tracking down one tribute after the other and kills them all whilst you stay back and hide, wait for him to come back. One time you dare to ask him how he can just kill everyone that easily. Black eyes land on you for a few silent moments before he tells you that he doesn't care about anyone else besides you. If it wouldn't have been in those circumstances, you might have felt flattered by those words.

💙 As you have feared and dreaded, ultimately it's really only Sasuke and you left and that's when your fear really starts kicking in. He has reassured you throughout the game that he will find a way for both of you to survive but you just don't know how he plans to achieve that. You know that everyone is watching you two right now and Sasuke is just as aware of that and suddenly pulls you closer to him, one arm wrapping around you to hug you. For a split second you're confused only to completely freeze when you feel the blade of the katana pressing against your back, slightly pressing against it. He won't let anything separate you two, not even death. So if both of you can't survive, he'll just kill the both of you instead. You clutch the material of his outfit in your hand, wide eyes meeting his own horrified and silently begging him to reveal that this is a twisted joke. Your heart stops for a few seconds when you realize that this is his plan though, his ultimatum. Silence that drags on for far too long before both of you are named the victors, his daring gamble paying off. You lose all strength in your legs, Sasuke tightening his grip on you to keep you steady. A smirk on his face as you're pressed against him. Perfect, everything worked out.

Sakura Haruno

🌸 The 75th Hunger Game is around and with that special anniversary comes the Quarter Quell with a twist to the rules to make the games more entertaining for those who watch them and even more gruesome and bloody for those who are forced to participate. This year's game is especially anticipated among the richest people in the Capitol and especially dreaded among the districts, especially those who can not afford to train their children. When the special rules for this year are read out, everyone is watching it with mixed feelings, the most common ones fear and dread. Winners from previous games are supposed to participate in the games and team up with one tribute that is chosen from the lottery. That means that from each district one tribute and one winner will participate and to make it only more interesting, this year two winners will be allowed. Only if both of them are the victor and the tribute from the same district though.

🌸 Everyone has obviously heard from Sakura from your district, the poorest in all of Panem. Who didn't? She's legendary, 16 years old when she won the Hunger Games 3 years ago and stood out with her unusual strength and ability to create poison which she then used to paralyze and murder her opponents with. She's chosen as the victor that will participate in this year's Hunger Games to represent the victors from their district as she's the youngest one. Chosen as the other tribute to fight alongside with her are you, in your last year where you could have been chosen as a tribute. Your whole family is horrified as this is essentially a death sentence for you and you have no choice but to put your faith in Sakura, who was actually your friend before she moved to the Victor's Village with her family, who comes soon over to pick you up and mentor you. Her face contorts in one of shock when she sees you, her heart dropping into her stomach. No, why did they have to choose you this year?

🌸 It's been years since you've seen each other but Sakura has never forgotten you. How could she? You were her best friend back in the days when she was all shy and insecure and together with her family the main thing that kept her going during her time as a tribute in the Hunger Games. She tries to push all her emotions down but that is very hard because this is not how she envisioned your first encounter after such a long time to be. She pulls it ultimately together though as she senses that her fear only makes you lose your hope more. The time before the game starts is short so she has to teach you as much as she can. She mentors you in multiple things such as hand-to-hand combat, how to hide your own tracks and read the ones of others and especially in the usage of medicine and poison, the area she's the most skilled with. It's so much for you though, too much in such a short time yet she promises you that she'll do her everything to see it through that both of you survive.

🌸 She's terribly overprotective but you won't blame her for that as soon as the game starts and you're thrown into the hell that is meant to entertain those people in the Capitol. In fact, everything you see is too much for you to handle and you resort to clinging to Sakura as your sole pillow of protection and comfort since everyone else wants you dead. This in return only makes Sakura worse even if she won't show it all of the time. She immediately knows what the strategy of everyone is. They try to slaughter the tributes of districts that are ideally no Careers to take the easy route since without their tributes, the victors will have automatically lost. That's why Sakura never allows you to stray away from her side, something she doesn't need to tell you twice. Part of you has always been a little bit curious to know how she survived her first game though since the Sakura you have known throughout the years was too kind to hurt anyone. Your opinion is definitely about to change.

🌸She's rather merciful for the most part, only killing someone if they attack you and then with the poison she has already extracted from the snakes and poisonous insects within the arena.  It's the last fight that brings something out of her that is truly fearful when the only other two survivors, Career and champion from the second district, manage to catch her off-guard and hurt you. Not seriously as you're quick enough to dodge but enough to make you scream out in pain which causes Sakura to see red. It's hard to tell what you witness but at the end of it you only know that Sakura rushes to you to quickly tend to your wounds whilst your eyes can only zoom in on the two people behind her, one of them with his head smashed in and dead whilst the other one is still slightly twitching as his life slowly leaves him. Their blood is still on her hands as she stops the bleeding and bandages the wound whilst you distantly note that you two are announced the victors. That's when you finally manage to look her into her green eyes and she manages to give you an exhausted grin, mumbling that you two made it. That's when you wonder if everything you've just seen has been some sort of fever dream as there's no trace of that bloodlust left on her face anymore.

[fleet-of-fiction]

Jake Kiszka // Female Narrator

Part Four

After a blinding light eradicates mankind, you're left in a desolate and empty world. A year of solitude eliminates all belief that anyone else was left behind. Until a chance encounter on the side of the road. Jake is injured and fighting for his life, but his presence brings a renewed sense of hope. Touch starved and lonely, you need him. And undoubtedly, he needs you too.

"It would be the last man on earth that would end up being mine..."

Explicit sexual content Sex (penetrative & oral) /Foreplay /Blood / Injury / Hunting. / Intense emotions / Death.

Day 430 ~ Amelia

Gunshots echoed through the canopy. Birds cried out overhead, fleeing their nests. The sound of wings in desperate flight as they tried to escape an inevitable death. And I'd never particularly enjoyed it, to see their little bodies hit the ground and have to pluck their feathers and gut them like they'd never been living, breathing creatures of the earth we shared.

But I could no longer walk into a grocery store and pick one up all nice and neatly packaged. Plucked and skinned ready to be chopped or diced. I had to watch the life fade from their eyes.

"I think I got one." Jake said, lowering the rifle from his cheek bone. "I'm getting good at this."

He was a good shot. You couldn't deny him the satisfaction he took with each kill. Never more than birds or squirrels. Anything more would have been outside your realms as a hunter. You'd never been allowed to shoot anything bigger.

"Make sure it's a clean kill." You always said it, like there was a way to absolve yourself of having to take a life.

He was starting to grow a little line of hair above his lip and on the underside of his chin. I suspected he wasn't capable of garnishing his face with anything more, but it was starting to change the shape of his face. He looked a little more rugged. Like a man who had seen some things he dared not speak of. A man who had known suffering but could still smile despite it all.

"You don't have to do this anymore." He sighed, flinging his kill over his shoulder. "I can see how uncomfortable it makes you."

He would have done anything to give me comfort. He was gentle and kind and whimsical. He didn't belong on his own, he was a pack creature. He needed validation and love, but more than that he needed somewhere to belong.

"You want me to stay home and tend the house while you go out hunting? Like a tv wife?" I jested, balking at the sight of the dead bird he carried.

"Why not?" He shrugged with sincerity. "And then I can come home after a long day and kick my boots off and say honey, I'm home!"

It had never crossed my mind that Jake would take over some of the duties I'd been doing all by myself. That he would want to carry some of the burden of our survival. I'd hoped, perhaps, that he might integrate himself as somebody I could exist alongside of without too much of a struggle.

But in truth, I was falling in love with him.

"If only the apocalypse had been of the zombie variety." I said, rolling my eyes. "You'd have had all the opportunities in the world to shoot things."

I started back towards the cabin, following the muddy path back up from where we'd found ourselves down near the lake. All the birds liked to congregate near the water. To hunt game it was the best spot in the woods. A steep incline that was always an inconvenience on the way back up awaited us, and I was eager to get back inside before the light began to fade.

"The dead are still here, aren't they?" He mused, staying close behind but far enough away that the corpse on his shoulder didn't unnerve me too much. "Isn't that what you said? There's still time."

I couldn't help but giggle at his intimation. But I was still haunted by those vacant eyes on the slab. Telling me everything I needed to know without speaking a damn word.

"I think if the dead had any plans to rise they would have done it a long time ago." I replied, "And besides, we don't need another thing roaming around out there."

We heard them at night. Howling. All the dogs that had once been docile pets in the towns and cities, wild and free like their ancestors now. Those who had survived, at least. Those that had adapted. I pitied their struggle the most. Where once they'd known nothing but love, there was only the hunt to kill instinct.

And as I watched Jake take his prized kill home to eat, I did wonder how he had managed to retain all his softness.

Day 431 ~ Amelia

He didn't sleep in that bunk anymore. It had gone unslept in ever since the rain had stopped. Every night he'd asked me if I wanted him to go back to his room and every night I'd made a promise to myself that just one more wouldn't hurt.

And every single one of those promises felt as if I was making them to a faceless and nameless deity that held my life's destiny in their hands. Who was I making that promise to? Why did it matter? Would it be so terribly wrong to continue enjoying Jakes body next to mine?

I was never really certain who's voice it was speaking to me when I told myself that it was wrong to need him. That same voice screaming at me now telling me it was wrong to want him.

How could I not fall in love with him? He took his time with me. Spending hours whispering questions into my ear. Sweeping his hands over my body, asking me if I liked the way he touched me. If I needed him to do anything differently. Altering his pressure and speed to my preference. Reducing me to a quivering wreck without ever asking for anything in return.

Once I knew that it was inevitable, I couldn't stop the temptation anymore. Satisfying each other with our hands and our tongues, never stepping over the threshold of penetration. It was a risk I simply wasn't prepared to make.

"Amelia?"

I snapped my head up over the shelf of cereal that was slowly decaying away. Jake was standing on the other side, stuffing detergent and fabric softener into his back pack.

"Sorry, I was miles away."

He smiled at me.

The store was shrouded in darkness, daylight coming in from the entrance at the other side. The fresh food had long since perished or been eaten by scavenging dogs and what was left was either long past usable or too heavy for me to load into my Grandpa's truck.

"I said I need to head over to home depot." He repeated, "Gonna fix that door on the chicken coop."

The incessant rapping of it blowing in the wind had kept him awake. He was adamant that he could fix it, despite confessing to having little to no experience with joinery. Something else that really didn't seem to matter. He would try, regardless.

"I've got a few things I need to do before we head back." I replied, hoping he wouldn't venture into it any further.

Supply runs had always been something I'd endured more than enjoyed. There was something about built up areas that just soaked me in a fear that reminded me I was alone. And sometimes, I'd been afraid that perhaps there was a chance that I wasn't. Watching Jake grab things off the shelves and hum to himself as he scanned the ever dwindling aisles, I felt a sense of calm.

"Oh yeah, like what?" He questioned, cocking his head to the side as we met at the end of the cereal boxes.

"Meds supplies." I replied, pleased at the speed in which I'd come up with something that wasn't entirely a lie. "Used a lot of stock on you when you first got here."

His hunting rifle was tucked away under his pack straps. His hair tied back into a low bun, a serious darkness beneath his eyes where he hadn't slept making his gaze appear more sinister as he pulled me in.

"Meet you back at the truck in thirty minutes?" He whispered, sliding palms down the curve of my spine as he kissed the edge of my jaw.

"Thirty minutes." I agreed, letting him have a taste of a kiss before we went in separate directions.

The Roanoke planned parenthood was only a short walk from the depot, but far enough away that I knew he wouldn't find cause to follow me there. It was eerily void of life, as I'd expected. But I still had to step over the weather worn and ripped remains of pro-life flags that were strewn across the open entrance.

The irony was not lost upon me. How none of it mattered anymore and yet there I was, after the world had ended, responsible for ensuring I didn't get knocked up. I laughed a little, at the ridiculousness of it. Trying to keep my footsteps light as they echoed down empty clinic corridors.

It was far too close a reminder of those first days in the hospital. The shadows of others still lingering in the ether. But not anymore. The only thing that echoed was me and my choice not to bring life into a world that had purged itself of it.

Like everywhere else, it was dark. The windowless corridors winding down towards examination and consultation rooms that were equally void of natural light. It wasn't difficult to find where they kept the IUD's and implants, once I'd stumbled on the only cupboard that was locked.

I'd have to do it myself. Make the incision and implant the device into my flesh. It wasn't something they'd taught in medical school. Performing minor surgery on yourself in the event of the eradication of mankind. Yet, there I was. Scalpel in hand and a reluctance to watch as I made the incision. Blood dripped down my arm. Pain tore through me. I clenched my eyes shut as I clicked it into place beneath my skin.

I held my breath. Sent curses reverberating off the clinic walls. A massacre in my hand as I held the shaking blade up in disbelief that I had done it. I didn't even know if it would work. Everything had a use-by date. Even the medication I knew would one day become useless.

As I wrapped my arm up, careful not to apply too much pressure, I let my mind wander into a future that was so uncertain I didn't want to picture it. I could see a faceless child sitting on the porch steps, a sweet voice calling out to me in a dream like echo. But it wasn't my name they were calling, it was Mommy...

I shuddered. The dread spilling down my spine like a portent. I wouldn't. I couldn't. No child deserved to grow up alone. The fantasy that I could have spent my life never knowing how Jake felt inside me becoming a real possibility as I checked my watch.

Five minutes to get back to the truck before he would panic.

I was uninspired. Feeling the gravity of my choice and my blood. He would sit there with his cock in his hand. Hard and fierce. And I would know pain for this pleasure. The sacrifice entirely mine. For him? I would have cut myself a thousand times. Uninspired, but only because I hurt.

I felt the rush of adrenaline spike as I returned to the daylight. Kicking those flags to the side as I exited. No doubt in my mind that if by some terrible mistake we brought a child into this world it would be loved and cherished. But only by us. And that wasn't enough.

He was waiting by the truck as I approached. One knee bent against the wheel arch, eyes roving around in search of me.

"Sorry." I yelled across the empty street. "Got a little delayed."

There was palpable relief in his face as I greeted him, throwing my pack in the back along with whatever he'd thrown in there. I could see wood and tools and various other things we potentially didn't need, but he'd taken anyway.

"I realised something." He said, taking the liberty of moving my hair aside, making me pay attention to the seriousness of his tone.

I'd often wondered where he got this air of confidence from. It was as if there had never been any doubt in his mind of how he felt. How certain he was that I would never hurt him. I wanted to bottle it up and drink it.

"What?" I replied, letting him covet me.

"I missed you." He murmured, fingertips planing down my throat. "We haven't been apart, not really. I was walking through home depot and I was struck by this feeling that you should've been with me."

I could see the wistfulness in his deep brown eyes. He was picturing us sauntering through home depot together, talking about all the things we wanted to do to improve our home. Discussing measurements and which grain of wood would look best. Maybe he was imagining it before the world ended. Maybe there were other people doing the exact same thing and the exact same time in his little daydream.

I envied him of that dream. I wanted so badly to imagine the sweetness of it. But all I could feel was the throbbing ache in my arm.

"You're somewhere else." He mused, pulling me back as he realised I wasn't responding. "What's the matter?"

His hands came about my arms, trying to embrace me. I flinched, causing all the faraway beauty in his eyes to fade. Now there was only concern.

"Are you hurt?" He fussed.

"No, no. Nothing like that." I protested, shrugging out of his embrace so that I could lower my coat sleeve.

He could see the blood pooling beneath the bandage. I hadn't been careful enough with myself. But he seemed to understand. He traced a fingertip against the blood, looking to me to see if it hurt.

"I never would have asked this of you." He said stoically. "I'd have taken responsibility."

There was no doubt in my mind that he would have. The sweet gentleness of his discourse as he kissed me in the crisp late winter air was enough. Streams of breath converging as his mouth opened to welcome my tongue. The incessant throbbing that took home in my core beating a song that told me I had done the right thing. This was my choice. Regardless.

"We can't bring a child into this, Jake." I shook my head, steadying his mouth as it continued against mine with a hand to his cheek. "You understand that, don't you?"

He paused. As if the thought hadn't crossed his mind deeply enough to plague him. Such was the privilege of a man.

"I'd have been satisfied." He countered, "Haven't you been satisfied these last few weeks?"

To what end could we had rolled around in those sheets until we'd have become irrevocably connected? He was sweet to say it. But I'd seen enough of humanity to know their wants and needs.

"Jake..." I said matter-of-factly. "It's just a little cut. It will heal. It just means we don't have to be so careful now. Don't you want that?"

He closed his eyes slowly. Exhaling. As if the thought alone was a sinful repose of a dream that would be something he could truly have. I liked the way he thought about it. Making a low, gravelly sound as he pulled my coat my back up over my shoulders.

"If I ever wanted anything, it's that." He replied, pressing his lips to my forehead as he bundled me up and into the truck. "Now let's get home so that I can fuck you senseless."

I was about to explain about the seven days grace period for it to start working, but my eye was caught by movement down the street. I peeked over the edge of the passenger side door as I climbed in, taking note of the creatures that appeared at the intersection.

"Jake, look!" I whispered.

He was searching for the keys in his many pockets. Distracted. I grabbed his chin and forced his head up, causing him to still even his breathing.

Creeping steadily through the urban decay, they noticed us as we noticed them. A mountain lion mother and her cub. My heart was pounding in my chest. Round, black eyes met mine in a solemn gaze across the concrete keeping us apart. She understood that I meant her no harm. And she, in return, began to pad away from us in mutual respect for whatever life had been left behind.

"Get a lot of mountain lions around here?"

His voice was small. Riddled with fear. His hand reaching for the rifle on the back of his pack. I put my hand on his to steady him.

"No." I replied calmly, "Not for hundreds of years. Hunting grounds must be changing. She means us no harm."

The little cub took a curious look at us. Their whiskers snuffling into the air, no doubt catching our scent before following it's mother.

"For a world that doesn't seem to want life, it sure as fuck seems to have given precedence to other life forms." Jake huffed, "We're the only species who can control the outcome of sex."

"But for how long?" I sighed, "Life finds a way."

Maybe the portent was in this. As I watched the mother and cub disappear behind the building opposite, I was gripped with a sense that in reality I had no control whatsoever. Everything we were doing right now to prevent life was futile. Maybe it wasn't humanity that had been eradicated. Maybe it was just the humanity that we'd become.

Day 439 ~ Jake

The days were growing warmer and longer. I could feel the pull of spring in the trees. My lungs felt much fuller, now that I could draw breath without too much trouble.

The ground was drying up, it felt like the birds were starting to chirp in the morning more sweetly. What had been sleeping was starting to awaken. And it felt like I was, too.

Amelia was the sort of woman I didn't know that I needed. The sort of woman who craved to be taken care of but would ruthlessly abandon all requests for help. She didn't need me, I knew that I was surplus to requirements when she reluctantly allowed me to start hunting and chopping wood without her interference.

But I was under no illusion that she wanted me. She stood on the porch steps with a steaming cup, diligently watching me with the axe in my hand. Chopping wood was something I knew, something I'd always done. Something she hadn't needed to show me.

"Enjoying the show?" I teased, rounding off another harsh blow as the log beneath my strike split in two on the block.

She continued to sip on her drink, leaning against the rail. Wearing a t-shirt that I'd picked up during a supply run, grateful to be out of the clothes she'd given me to wear. Wrapped in an oversized cardigan and nothing covering her legs, she looked like she'd only just rolled out of bed.

"You're putting on quite the performance." She giggled, sending my pulse into disarray.

It had been hours since I'd touched her. I knew it would be something I'd have to endure, knowing I was days away from being able to slide inside her and know what she felt like wrapped around my cock. I'd tortured myself with it. Ticking off mental hours as I'd laid in bed at her side.

I shook my head, strands of my hair falling out from the bun I'd lazily sculpted to keep it out of my face as I chopped. The heat of the exertion making me sweat beneath my flannel shirt.

"Are you just going to stand there and watch?" I asked, fighting the urge to stick my axe in the block and go over to her.

"Yes." She replied stubbornly.

I placed another log in the block. Rounding off to a resounding blow that caused the two halves to shoot off either side of the axe. I always felt more powerful when that happened, as if the singular blow was strong enough that I didn't need to pull it out and round off again to complete the split. It felt all the more satisfying knowing that she had seen it.

"Hmmm, you like to watch huh?" I threw the two halves into the pile I'd already made, throwing her an amused smile too.

Last night she'd been like putty in my hands. Her body stiff as I worked my way around her clit, her eyes closed and her moans stifled as I talked her through it. Telling her she was soft and warm, growing hard against her hip as she revelled in the way I spoke to her. The hemisphere of her lower body completely saturated, beholden to my whim.

I told her she was the most beautiful creature I had ever seen. That her pussy felt so good against my hand. Trailing a breeze of a touch over her swollen bud, making her buck upwards for a harder friction. I liked the way she begged me for more. Her little whimpering voice so submissive, so sweetly veiled in the question she wouldn't dare to ask for outside the realms of sex.

Weeks of foreplay building up to this.

"You know, it'll be warm enough to chop wood without your shirt on soon." She raised a playful eyebrow, mischief in her voice.

I stuck my axe in the block and wiped my brow with the back of my hand. Releasing a few more buttons until my chest met the cool air.

"You're nothing but a fan, aren't you? I'm really sorry to tell you that I don't fuck my fans." I shrugged, watching her wrap the cardigan around her waist as she appraised me.

"That is a shame." She replied sarcastically. "Because here I was coming to tell you that the seven days were up."

The blood flow to my cock immediate piqued. I could feel it begin to stir, throbbing at the underside and tip as it slowly grew.

She lost all her joviality as she stared at me. Her blue eyes striking me, as they always did, like she could see straight through me into the parts of me I couldn't hide.

"What are you waiting for?" I dared to ask, the two of us locked in a strange stand off.

She let the cardigan open. I could see her chest rising and falling, her breath deep and shallow. She let it fall to the ground. With violent intent she tore down the steps, pulling off the t-shirt over her head. Messing up her hair, ragged breaths escaping me as I found myself struggling to breathe once more.

I stepped away from the chopping block. Buttons flying open as I ripped my shirt off. My fingers not doing as I willed them as I tried to pull my belt buckle apart. The anticipation was making every nerve ending numb, like I couldn't formulate a string of thoughts that made any sense. Not even the ones required to pull my belt off.

She took it from me. Yanking it from my failing hands. Pulling my body into hers with it, striking a match I knew would never extinguish. She unclasped the buckle with ease. There was no difficulty for her, no stumble in her step as she pulled everything down in a desperate attempt to take what she wanted.

There was nothing more beautiful than her desire. It was far more dark than who she was in the cold light of day. And I was drawn to the darkness, I always had been. The fathomless prose of her eyes as she wasted no time in dragging our bodies to the ground.

I could smell the earth. The moss and the fern. The wood and the soil. I could feel it at my back, solid and soft all at the same time. And her above me, like the Goddess that she was. All knotted hair and freckles as she straddled over my erection.

There would be time enough for gentleness. Time enough to savour it. What had been building for all those nights which came before demanded to be slaked. She didn't even waste the time that it would take to rip her thong off, slipping the fabric at her crotch to the side in haste.

"Fuck..." She hissed, a symphony of unadulterated songs there in her voice as she sank onto my grateful cock.

I couldn't stop myself from digging my fingers into her hips. Guiding her up and down in blissful rhythm. She felt like a tight little ribbon had wrapped itself around me from base to tip, coveting my shaft in smooth silken wetness that threatened to unravel far sooner than I'd have liked.

It was the combination of how she felt inside and the look on her face that would ruin me. The way her tits bounced as she moved, the way she softly cursed at the way I rutted upwards to hit deeper. My own words reeling out like poetry of filth.

"You feel so good, fuck... stretching me so good Jakey...I swear..."

Who was this girl? This woman? All those soft mumbles as I'd edged her to oblivion with other parts of my body had stepped aside for this demon who worshipped my cock. The altar set, her devotion of it unrepentant.

She had bled for this. She'd cut for this. She would have it and that fact alone made me feel as if I wanted to cum inside her right there as I stared up at her pained expressions. Brow furrowed and lips parted, panting wildly as her breasts rubbed against my chest as she leaned into a kiss that was dominated by tongue and arousal.

"You like how my cock feels?" I breathed, clutching her ass in both palms, letting my finger tips reach around for where I could feel myself sliding in and out of her.

She bit down on her lower lip, nodding passionately as I parted her ass cheeks and manipulated a single fingertip towards her sweet spot. She gasped. An evil little smirk taking place of the shock once I began massaging, any hope of romance dashed.

"It's everything...everything..." She sang, bittersweet because no matter how many times I would fuck her this would always be the first time.

It wasn't how I'd imagined it. I'd been the hero of that day dream. The one who had taken her, pleased her and pounded her into the mattress for as long as it took to make her cum on my eager cock. I'd been the one to instigate it, guide her into an orgasm that would've lifted the lid on her immortal soul. This was not that. This was real. Gritty. Down in the mud and with a ferocity that was all hers.

"That's it, my beautiful girl, take it..."

This wasn't about me, although I felt as if my cock had never known such a welcome as she clenched around me. This was about her. Whatever she wanted from me, she had earned. She deserved. I took her thrusts and shot my own into the rhythm, holding her ass as I pounded upwards. Her corresponding moans a clear signal that she wanted it like that.

"Fuck me harder, Jake...I'm almost there..."

I could feel that ribbon start to fray at the edges. My resolve fading. The tingle that shot up my shaft like the resurrection of a feeling I'd not had in so long I'd almost forgotten it.

"You gonna cum all pretty for me?" I asked, seeing the flush in her cheeks and the desperation to finish in her eyes. "Such a fucking beautiful pussy, give it up to me...It's mine."

My claim had her screaming a siren call that disrupted the nesting birds. She arched her back and let me see those tremendous breasts and the heaving of her stomach against her ribs as she released. The trees rumbled as the birds took flight, and so did her orgasm. Mine flowing out through the tip of my cock, spurting inside her as I tried to hold it together. To let her have her moment.

Because that was all it was. A moment. Not hours of love making. Hours of brutal fucking. Just a moment that she had taken, and I had given freely. And it wasn't until we were done that I'd known quite how much I'd been pining for a sweet little pussy like hers to let me in. How much I'd disregarded how much I needed it.

It was like I wasn't in survival mode anymore. I was thriving.

Day 469 ~ Amelia

We passed the wreckage where I'd found him on our route towards the road. It felt like part of the forest now, vines and shrubs growing around it. Reclaiming it. Sometimes I regarded it and wondered what might have happened if our paths had never crossed.

And other times I paid it no attention at all. Passing it like I would any other tree. For some reason, on this particular day, Jake had felt the need to stop.

"Do you ever think about it?" He asked poignantly, running his hand over the smoked frame of what was once his car.

"Sometimes." I replied, letting him figure out whatever it was that was hanging on. "But I try not to. We found each other, didn't we?"

I was obsessed with him. The way he looked, the way he felt. The way he tasted after drinking wine and the way he smelled after a shower. The shape of his lips and the way his mouth pockets moved as he spoke. Even the dark circles that were ever present beneath his eyes were a reason to love him.

"It scares the fuck out of me to think I could have driven right past you and never known."

I took his hand away and put it in mine. Entwining our fingers.

"You can't think like that. There's a thousand what if's and none of them stand against what we've got." I comforted him, "If we truly are the only ones left, how lucky that it was you and I that were left behind."

He coiled those big hands around my waist.

"You always know what to say when I get like this." He crooned softly into my ear, "Why don't you let me be the big strong man you need for a while?"

Day light would fade in a few hours. I liked it when he needed to feel dominant, I relished in it. But the walk we needed to take was another hour south.

"I would, but you know I have a surprise for you." I sighed, letting him rail a hand down the curve of my breasts. "So you'll have to save all that big strong manliness for later."

He grunted into my neck and placed a solitary kiss there.

"I love you, my sweet Amelia."

He'd said before in his sleep. But never in waking hours. I tried to keep my heart from soaring. But he noticed the way I held my breath at the sound of those words. Taken aback by them, almost. Unexpected. And yet soulfully beautiful, here in this tiny little moment where he needed something to hold on to.

"And I love you, my darling Jake." I whispered back, "Now, come on. There's something I want to show you."

.

.

.

@caprisunsister @thewritingbeforesunrise @takenbythemadness @katuschka @its-interesting-van-kleep @lvnterninthenight @writingcold @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @edgingthedarkness @velveteencatch @lyndz2names @nina-23-45 @itsafullmoon @vikingisthenewsexy @char289

[dyns33]

All fine

I'm still not done with Shane.

I did a little Reader!Rick x Shane, even if I already wrote something a bit similar.

"I know. It's fine."

It had taken a long time for Shane to come to Y/N, his eyes indicating that he was finally ready to tell her the truth.

Before, they had been very happy.

They had met at work, at the Atlanta police station, first forced to work together despite their differences, then becoming friends, lovers, then married.

When Y/N had taken a bullet, Shane's face was the last thing she saw before losing consciousness.

"No. Baby, no. Shh. Shh, shh, shh. You stay with me, okay ? It's okay, you stay with me. You're not leaving me. I love you, baby. Stay with me. No, stay with me ! Y/N !”

What happened next, Y/N still didn't fully understand today. She had been taken to the hospital, and Shane had come to see her every day while she was in a coma, and then the dead started walking.

The first thing her husband had wanted to do was go get her, not caring about the chaos and danger. But Y/N hadn't woken up, and moving her would mean killing her, so Shane had barricaded the door so she wouldn't be eaten in her sleep and left, crying.

According to him, he had been a coward. An asshole. He should have stayed in the room with her, until the end, so they could die together, or he should have been there when she finally opened her eyes.

But he was afraid. He didn't want to die.

He had found a group of survivors, including his best friend Rick's wife and son, who had not survived.

Shane had never looked at Lori before. He had always seen Rick's wife, nothing else, and he didn't look at other women since he was married anyway. He wasn’t really looking at her now, even though he thought Y/N was dead. He just felt alone and hopeless.

When Y/N had arrived at camp, it had been over a month since the apocalypse had started, and two weeks since he had been secretly sleeping with Lori.

She didn't want others to know, especially her son, because they would ask too many questions. He didn't want the others to know because he was ashamed. He felt like he was abandoning Y/N again. The fact that she was alive didn't help.

Oh, he was happy she came back. He had kissed her again and again without being able to stop, crying like a baby, refusing to let go and apologizing.

"Everything is fine." she told him, without knowing what he was really talking about.

Nothing more happened with Lori after her return. It wasn't a problem, she wasn't jealous, her son was her priority, and Shane continued to do everything to protect them.

Strangely, it was Andrea who was less accepting of the situation. Not only had she guessed what their leader was doing in secret, waiting to be able to taste him when Lori had finally thrown him away, but she found him too nice, too gentle, since his wife had returned.

"You seemed to have more balls before, but I guess she's the one calling the shots in the couple."

"You know what ? Yeah, exactly." Shane muttered, standing very close to her. "She's the one who decides. She's always been the brains of our duo, and I the muscles. She says, I do."

“And you don’t mind being a good doggie ?”

"Don't think I'm a good doggie. I bite when necessary, and take care of problems without her needing to know."

The threat was clear enough, and Andrea seemed to calm down for a time. Her remarks hadn't managed to disturb Shane, but it was true that the dynamic of their relationship had always been complicated, at work and at home.

Very dependent, very possessive, very jealous, Shane always needed to receive Y/N's approval, to know that she was proud, to feel her eyes on him.

He had done some bad things since the end of the world, but one was worse than the others, and he didn't dare admit it to her, too afraid of losing her.

When he finally found the courage, it had been almost four months, they had found refuge on a farm, and Lori was pregnant.

“I made a huge mistake…” he began, sitting down next to her during her shift. "I thought you were dead. I really thought you were dead."

"I know."

"No, listen. I really need to tell you…"

"Shane. I know. It's okay."

One of the reasons he fell in love with Y/N was because of her intelligence. Her ability to deduce things, which helped her a lot to understand him when he wasn't able to speak.

She had noticed his behavior, Lori's behavior. She had seen the signs. And on top of that, Andrea had spoken to her.

Y/N had known for weeks, saying nothing, waiting for him to come to her. And now that it was done, she promised him that everything was okay, touching his back and smiling.

"… No."

"What no ?"

"No !" he repeated, jumping out of his chair, suddenly furious. "Everything's not okay ! You should yell at me ! Hit me ! You can't act like you don't care ! I cheated on you, dammit !"

“Calm down, please.”

"Hit me ! Insult me ! Do something !"

“Shane…” Y/N sighed as she tried to touch his cheek, continuing to respond with gentleness instead of the violence he expected, that he demanded.

If she had done that to him, he would have gone crazy. He would have killed the guy, and he would have wanted to hurt her, and since he loved her too much for that, Shane would have hurt others, himself, before doing something really stupid.

He had thought she would react the same way, and like when she returned, he was not relieved that he had been wrong.

"You don't fucking care !"

"I do care ! I understand."

"You understand ?! You were rotting in a hospital room for a few days and I was already taking off her panties !"

"You were desperate ! You were alone ! It doesn't feel good, I wish it didn't happen, that we were together, that you didn't touch her, but it happened, I understand why, I love you and I don't want you to torture yourself about it anymore !'

Yes, Y/N had always been the brains of their relationship, and the heart, and everything in between. Shane just felt like an idiot who was lucky to have her, completely clueless as to why she was with him.

Before, she had forgiven him for a lot of things, the outings in bars, the fights, the fits of jealousy. He wasn't perfect, but she accepted him.

Nothing forced her to stay with him, now that society was in pieces, their rings no longer meant anything, and he had clearly proven himself to be nothing but a cowardly bastard.

Despite this, she had chosen him. He had been her first thought, her goal, and she had returned to him without the slightest hesitation, not suspecting what he had done.

“I abandoned you…” he sobbed, falling to his knees. “I let you get shot, I left you in that hospital, I cheated on you…”

"None of this is your fault. Nothing. You were there to help me, you closed the hospital door. I wouldn't be here if you hadn't done that. You held on because she comforted you, otherwise I would have found a group that would have told me you were dead.”

"I'm too cowardly to die."

"Stop it. Please stop. You've been upset for weeks, I see the look in your eyes. Sometimes… Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn't have been easier if you'd left the door open."

"Don't say that !" he yelled, grabbing her by the shoulders. "I love you ! I love you so much…I don't want to lose you…"

"I'm here. I love you too. Shane, I love you more than anything. It's okay." Y/N said, kissing him tenderly, pulling him into her arms, like she did after every pointless argument.

"She is pregnant."

"I know. It's okay. We're together, everything's okay."

The world was still shit, and it didn't seem like a quick fix could be found, but Shane decided that as always, he just had to listen to his wife and she would know what to do.

And if that wasn't the case, he would fix the problem without her knowing, and it would be all fine.

[calisources]

A   SONG   OF   ICE   AND   FIRE   &   HBO'S   GAME   OF   THRONES.   sentence   starters   taken   from   both   the   source   books   and   the   hbo's   adaptation   of   a   song   of   ice   and   fire   from   george   r.r.   martin.   change   titles,   names   and   pronouns   as   you   see   fit.

 "Tell them the North remembers. Tell them winter came for House Frey."

"Leave one wolf alive and the sheep are never safe."

"I'm not a lady. I never have been. That's not me."

"Nothing's more hateful than failing to protect the one you love."

"When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground."

"An unhappy wife is a wine merchant's best friend."

"What good is power if you cannot protect the ones you love?"

 "So we fight and die or we submit and die. I know my choice."

"I thought if I could make something so good, so pure, maybe I'm not a monster."

"Power is power."

"I'm not going to stop the wheel, I'm going to break the wheel."

"Do you understand? I'm no ordinary woman. My dreams come true."

"It's not easy to see something that’s never been before: A good world."

"I believe in second chances. I don't believe in third chances."

"As long as I'm better than everyone else I suppose it doesn't matter."

"When enough people make false promises words stop meaning anything. Then there are no more answers, only better and better lies."

"If you only trust the people you grew up with, you won't make many allies."

“Winter is coming. We know what’s coming with it."

"It is a big and beautiful world. Most of us live and die in the same corner where we were born in, never get to see any of it. I don't want to be most of us."

 "I wonder if you’re the worst person I've ever met? At a certain age it's hard to recall. But the truly vile do stand out through the years."

"Know your strengths, use them wisely, and one man can be worth ten thousand."

"Never forget what you are, the rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor and it can never be used to hurt you."

"I try to know as many people as I can. You never know which one you'll need."

"No one is very happy. Which means it’s a good compromise."

 "Men decide where power resides, whether or not they know it."

"Give us common folk one taste of power and we're like the lion who tasted man—nothing is ever so sweet again."

"But it's you and me that matters to me and you. Don't ever betray me."

 "I want to be the queen."

"Any man who must say, I am the king, is no true king."

"The man who passes the sentence should swing the sword."

"If you think this has a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention."

"Chaos isn't a pit. Chaos is a ladder."

"A ruler who hides behind paid executioners soon forgets what death is." 

"Some old wounds never truly heal, and bleed again at the slightest word." 

"If you would take a man's life, you owe it to him to look into his eyes and hear his final words. "

"When the snows fall and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives."

"People often claim to hunger for truth, but seldom like the taste when it's served up."

"Every man must die, Jon Snow. But first he must live."

"We look up at the same stars and see such different things."

"I need you to become the man you were always meant to be. Not next year, not tomorrow, now." 

"It's a neat little trick you do. You move your lips, and your father's voice comes out. "

"Tell me something, Varys who do you truly serve?"

"They’re dragons, Khaleesi. They can never be tamed."

"Love is the death of duty." 

"Thousands of men don't need to die. Only one of us. Let's end this the old way."

"I Am not beholden to my ancestors vows."

"Robert's rebellion was built on a lie."

"We're children playing at a game, screaming that the rules aren't fair."

"With respect, Your Grace, I don't need your permission. I am a King."

“The world is one great web, and a man dare not touch a single strand lest all the others tremble.”

“Black and white and grey, all the shades of truth.”

“In the songs all knights are gallant, all maids are beautiful, and the sun is always shining.”

“There is no creature on earth half so terrifying as a truly just man.”

“Every man should lose a battle in his youth, so he does not lose a war when he is old.”

“I prefer my history dead. Dead history is writ in ink, the living sort in blood.”

"The war continues, Davos Seaworth, and some will soon learn that even an ember in the ashes can still ignite a great blaze.”

 "He has a song. He is the prince that was promised, and his is the song of ice and fire.”

"The only time a man can be brave is when he is afraid."

[rummigumi]

Excerpt from Vanitas Part 4 draft (Yes I'm writing it out before Part 3, I don't control my brain):

Jason stared at the old god, hands clenched as he fought down the repulsion curling in his stomach.

“You wanted to talk?” The voice echoed around Jason. He swallowed down his fear as he replied, “I…what did you do to me?”

The god's head cocked to the side. “I brought you back to life, as the deal required.”

Jason had read enough ancient myths and stories around deals with gods to know it was never that simple. They'd exploit every loophole, use half truths to trick the mortals involved - anything to remind everyone who was in charge. To put those seen as beneath them in their place. The anger he was growing used to was quickly replacing the fear in his chest.

“So you screwed me over, huh? The deal was to bring me back, but you thought it'd be funny to mess me up first? Make sure I came back wrong?”

“You didn't come back wrong.” The god said it so matter-of-fact it threw Jason off. Of course he came back wrong, why else would he feel the way he did? Why else would he feel so wrong? Like a piece had been ripped out and replaced with something that wasn't him?

“No…no I did. I…I wasn't like…like this before.”

“Like what?”

“So…so…,” angry, “emotional.”

The god was silent for a moment.

“Souls that have died often feel emotions more intensely than those that haven't.”

Stronger emotions didn't explain the burning pit that had made itself at home in Jason's stomach. They didn't explain why all he wanted to do was scream and fight and pound his fists against things until his knuckles bled and his bones creaked. They didn't explain why he'd look at Bruce and feel like he was dying all over again. Stronger emotions didn't explain that.

“But why…why do I feel this way? Why is it that all I can feel is hatred and rage?” He begged the god to explain why he was feeling what he was, because he needed someone to tell him. (He needed the god to tell him what he was feeling was reasonable, that he wasn't going insane.)

And the god just stared at him with its creepy unblinking eyes and dark expressionless face. When it finally spoke, its voice was soft in a way that only occurs when one is explaining death to a child. “You're angry because you are mourning, and in pain. You have lost who you were and the life you had before you died, and it's hurting you.”

That didn't sound right. Jason hadn’t lost anything; his life hadn't changed between pre- and post-death. He'd woken up, and aside from the worried glances and even more awkward hovering from Bruce, it had been easy to forget he had even died. How could he have lost anything when everything was exactly the same as before he died?

(Before he was killed.)

But Jason had changed. While living with Bruce he had grown soft, forgot what the world was really like, forgot that just because he wore a cape and believed in justice and doing the right thing and helping others it didn’t mean shit when push came to shove. He had forgotten what he had learned long ago while watching his mother spiral deeper and deeper into her addiction and he had to do anything to survive. Awful things happened, and the world kept on turning and the universe kept expanding and it didn't matter how good you were or if you did everything right, unless you won the karmic lottery you were screwed.

But dying had removed the naive beliefs that he had allowed to fill his head, had removed the rose-colored glasses Bruce had put over his eyes. Dying had changed him, but he hadn't lost who he was. If anything, it made him more of who he was before Bruce.

(Before stability and peace and enjoying being alive and allowing himself to be a kid-)

“No,” Jason's voice was choked and harsh, “you're wrong.”

And the god didn't smite him for daring to imply he knew better than it. It didn't even scold him. It simply asked, “Then what is causing your pain?”

[n0b0dy11]

Home ~ S.B.

pairing: siriusblack x fem!reader

genre: fluff and angst?

warnings: azkaban, stupid sirius, order of the phoenix

Sirius hadn't been a player all his life, sure he had hoped from girl to girl for a very long period in his life but everything had changed when he met her.

Y/n had always been around, she had been going to Hogwarts for just as long as the Marauders. The difference, she liked quiet. Y/n was a girl who liked the background, the silence while in the library, the peace by the Black Lake.

She hadn't meant to catch the eye of the heartthrob Sirius Black, she hadn't meant to ruin all the other girls' chances. She merely wanted to survive school, live her life and raise a family with a caring and sweet husband.

How times changed. Now she was a single mother raising twins with her husband a mass murderer and in Azkaban.

"Just let me take you out on one date!"

"Black, you aren't even asking me! You are springing this one me as if it's an order and I have no choice."

The boy shook his head and walked closer his hands out reaching for hers, when he took her soft ones in his he smiled happily. They fit perfectly, "Will you please go on a date with me?"

"You don't even know me," she whispered taking her hands back. His smiled dropped as he searched her eyes for a joke or lie in them. Then it dawned on him, he had never even been this close to see her eyes were the prettiest he had ever seen.

"I can get to know you! That's what dates are for right?"

"Not with you," she said as she started backing away from him. "You don't go on dates to 'get to know a girl', I can't believe you'd even think I'd fall for that."

"It's the truth!"

But it was hopeless as she had her back turned and was walking off towards the great hall, "You don't think I'm stupid do you?"

Now she was chasing him, memories of him, she had photo's stacked away in a closet which she only showed to her children. They deserved to know their father , from their mother's point of view.

Y/n was sitting in the library as usual, it was the only place she now found peace and quiet. Sirius had somehow found her by the Black Lake, in Hogsmeade, everywhere... But in the library she could she curl up with a book somewhere in the back and never have him bother her.

Until today.

"Can I talk to you for a sec?"

"I already told you Black, I am not interested as -"

"long as I keep toying at your feelings I know, believe me I know." The boy sat himself down beside her, his hands holding a book themselves. "I wanted to tell you something."

Y/n looked up at him, expectantly but also a little bored, "Go on then."

"I, uh, I won't try to persuade you anymore."

She scoffed, letting her head fall to down again, "I told you it was all fake, you didn't really wanna go out with me right? Tell me was it a prank? A bet?"

He looked at her surprised, "What? No!"

She just rolled her eyes, not daring to look up at him, "right."

"It's true! I just- " he took a deep breath. "You don't believe me, so I will let you go, but I - I want to start over? I really like you, Y/n, so it would mean a lot if you maybe just gave me chance as friends, and I promise I won't try anything."

"Friends?"

"Just friends."

That didn't last for long though. Once they were friends the real bets rolled in, when they'd get together, when they'd get married, how their kids would be called etc.

Now however the bets were that she had helped him, that she'd killed her best friend along with her husband.

"I know he promised you it was only platonic, but have you considered it?"

"Considered what Lils?"

"Being more than friends?"

Y/n scoffed, she wanted to open her mouth and tell her she hadn't. That it was stupid she even thought so. But she couldn't. Of course she had thought about it, he was bloody gorgeous, funny and just magnifique.

"It doesn't matter," she answered instead, "Like you said, it's only platonic."

"But that can change."

"Lily," Y/n sighed, "I know you're trying to do well, but it isn't going to work. We differ too much, he's popular, handsome, sporty- I'm, me... He could have anyone he wants Lily, why would he ever settle for me when I've blown him off in the past. He wouldn't be interested anymore anyway."

The redhead sat down next to her, taking her hand in hers, "Those are your words, Y/n. He loves you-"

"He doesn't."

"Have you seen him with a girl these past few days? No, because even if he told you it was platonic, he can't find himself loving anybody else. He loves you, Y/n. Don't let him go because you're scared."

She took that chance, she hadn't let him go. Except that one night and it caused her him forever.

"We have been together for a year now," Sirius said. He had Y/n's hand in his as they walked together in Hogsmeade. He had wrapped her in one of his Gryffindor scarfs and beanies. He loved to dress her up in his clothes, even more so when he got to undress her later on.

"Mhm," she hummed her hand clasped around his swaying between them as they walked.

"I didn't know what to get you-"

"Nothing."

"- Let me finish," he chuckled shoving her gently with their interlocked hands, "I knew you didn't want something but I did so."

He got a little box out of his pocket and handed it to her, "You know normally if you ask someone to marry them you get on one knee and give them it themselves." He rolled his eyes at her remark, but as she opened it and did find a ring in it she gasped and looked at him, "I was joking you know, I don't think-"

"It's not an engagement ring, darling, it's a promise ring. That one day I'll change when we do get married."

"You want to get married?"

"Of course. Nobody else can handle my good looks!"

Their wedding was amazing, being married to him was a dream. He made her favourite's for breakfast, massages before sleep, kisses all the time... He was the perfect husband.

When Y/n had gotten pregnant that didn't change, he made her weird cravings, even tried some with her, he talked to her belly every night, gave even more massages ... He was the perfect husband.

Then the twins were born, he loved them. A boy and a girl. He loved them. He cried even more than Y/n when they were finally there.

It was the weirdest thing when she found out he had done such a stupid thing, she didn't believe it. After her and the twins, he loved James the most, he was his brother. Lily was Y/n's friend, best friend!

Y/n kept his memory alive by the twins, told them stories and showed them pictures. She never lost faith in him.

Then the news came, he escaped. She smiled bittersweet at the paper, at her husband. A tear rolled from her eye and then the door, knocking.

She didn't want to open it, having dealt with enough reporters and ministry people. She tried ignoring it, but as the door opened and he spoke she sobbed.

"Still keeping the key under the extra flowerpot I see?"

"You're home!"

[angelst4re]

Hii its me (again) with a Caius request (pls tell me if im getting annoying with then i just love this Vampire sm) but i was gonna ask if you can do a angst then fluff? Again the reader is bellas sis, and it takes place in breaking dawn part 2 when they go to convince the volturi that renesmee isnt a vampire. The reader has been with Caius since new moon but she went to visit bella after she heard she was ‘sick’ and Caius gets m a d when he sees shes on bellas side. When a fight starts (but none of the volturi die like in alices vision) a wolf thinks the reqder is a vampire and attacks her. She has like no chance shes gonna survive so Caius turns her into a vampire and takes her back to Volterra and its all fluffy najsjsjsn omgs please tell me if thats too much i apologizee i have too much ideas😭 againnn i adore your work sm and youre one of the best Jamie writers i have readd❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

hi my love!!! ahh noo it's never annoying, i love getting requests :) (although right now i have 120+ which is mad! but it's always open for more!) but i loved this one so much and i'm thinking of possibly writing a part 2!! <3

Gods & Monsters- Caius Volturi x Reader

summary: in the request :)

warnings: none?

notes: i wrote this over three days so if there are any little plot holes or if something doesn't make sense then i'm sorry! it hasn't been proof read </3

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

You had been with the vampire for an entire year now, and he still would deny changing you. You had tried reasoning with him, telling him it meant that you could live together forever, but he still insisted on you staying alive, keeping your soul. You already made certain commitments, such as living with him and even moving to Italy, but it seemed like it wasn’t enough. 

When you heard the news that your little sister was sick, you insisted that he took you to her, but he would not. It ended in an argument between the two of you, and you left that night, taking all your belongings with you. You told him you might return one day, you just needed some time alone and to take care of your sister, and if he were to follow you then you would never come back. 

When you got to the Cullen’s home, you were too afraid to look at Bella. You had never seen her so unwell, and even Jacob told you that he didn’t think she would make it. You would lie down beside her on the sofa, holding her cold body in your arms, and you wondered whether there was anything Caius could do to help- but you already knew what he thought about your sister and her husband. 

That night, Bella told you that she was pregnant, and that’s what was causing her to feel so sick. You reassured her that she’ll be okay, but everyone was worrying that she wouldn’t make it through the birth, even Edward had his doubts. Carlisle said she would go into labour in the next few days, and you worried that it meant she only had a few more days to live. 

In a panic, you left that night to return to Volterra, to return to Caius. You knew he wouldn’t show you any sympathy, afterall, he despised your sister, but he welcomed you back with open arms, letting you cry into his chest. 

For days, you had tried not to think about it. You had distracted yourself with books from Caius’s library, and had gotten through three in one day. However, your mind would eventually go elsewhere as you read, and you would worry about Bella again. Caius insisted you spoke to him about it, he could tell something was really upsetting you, but you didn’t dare to say a word about it. You knew his response would be something along the lines of ‘she’s done it to herself, she could have prevented it’ and although it did seem to be the truth, you weren’t ready to face it just yet. 

To your surprise, you woke up one night and Caius wasn’t in the room with you. He would never leave you alone, especially at night, so there was either two reasons for this:

One, being that he had something important and urgent to attend to.

Two, something bad has happened to him.

You hoped for the first one, and so you slipped out of the covers and wrapped your fluffy red robe around you, before leaving your room. You could hear talking, but you couldn’t quite tell where it was coming from. 

“The Cullen’s, they have done something terrible.”

You creeped closer to the heavy metal doors, where you assumed the voices were coming from, but it was almost impossible to hear what they were saying. However, you worried they would hear you, or sense that you were there, so you fled back to your room and waited for Caius to return. 

When he finally returned, you instantly started to question him. You knew he had set rules, and one of them was to not listen in to any conversations that would happen in that room, but you didn’t care about that right now, you only cared about your sister. 

“What’s happened? Is Bella okay? Has she given birth yet? Caius, please, answer me!” 

He sighed, as if you were bothering him.

“She’s fine. It’s not your sister that’s the problem right now, it’s the child that she was seen with.” He shook his head lightly, as if he couldn’t believe what was happening, “we’ve been informed it’s an immortal child. Do you know what that means?” 

You shook your head, adjusting your posture slightly as you sat up on your bed. 

“Then don’t worry about it, darling, we’re already working on sorting out this… situation.” 

“What does that mean?” You asked, “if you lay so much as a finger on my sister-”

“I told you,” Caius spoke, beginning to lose his patience, “it isn’t your sister that we’re concerned about.” He said before leaving the room. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

You knew Caius said he wasn’t going to hurt Bella, but you couldn’t help but fear something terrible was going to happen- and you were glad you trusted your instincts. You were currently by Bella’s side, squeezing her hand reassuringly as you walked. You warned her that the Volturi knew about her daughter, and Alice had already had a vision that the Volturi were planning to punish the Cullens for what they had assumed had happened. 

As the Volturi arrived, you couldn’t help but worry about what Caius would do when he saw you with your sister, you even felt a little nervous when he looked at you, giving you a look that called you foolish. You knew how ruthless and sadistic he could be, but you would never in a thousand years believe he would hurt you. 

You gave Bella one last smile before you let go of her hand, letting her take Renesmee's as your eyes found their way back to Caius. You don’t think you have ever seen him look so angry before. 

Aro and Carlisle spoke, whilst Bella began to whisper to you, 

“Do you think everything will be okay?” 

“Of course,” you said, trying to believe it yourself, “I promise.”

“Aro,” Carlisle began, “let us discuss things as we used to, in a civilised manner.” 

“Fair words, Carlisle,” Aro spoke, “but a little out of place given the battalion you have assembled against us.” 

“I can promise you, that was never my intent. No laws have been broken.” 

“We see the child,” said Caius, his eyes focused on you as he spoke, “do not treat us as fools!” He snarled, his eyebrows furrowed in anger. 

“She is not an immortal!” Carlisle declared, but Aro wouldn’t give in so soon, he wanted proof, evidence- and he wanted it from Edward. 

So far, everything was going great for your side, and you even grinned smugly at Caius, who seemed to be getting more outraged by the second. Especially after Alice turned up, Jasper by her side. And in mere moments, the fight you were all anticipating had begun. 

Aro raised his arms, staying put with Marcus and Caius by his side whilst everyone else began to charge at each other. Kicks and punches were being thrown, wolves were leaping from vampire to vampire, in hopes of beheading their enemies. You weren’t too sure what to do, or where to go, as you were neither wolf nor vampire, and you felt like this wasn’t really your battle to fight. 

You watched in horror as people from both sides would fight, until you heard a low growl from behind you, before your body was flooded by fear and a sharp, agonising pain. 

The last thing you saw before it all went black was the pure shock and fear on Caius’ face before he dashed over to you. 

The wolf that bit you was chased off by another vampire, as Caius picked your limp body off of the snowy ground, holding you in his arms as he fell to his knees. In this moment, he could only care about one thing- and it was you. He couldn’t lose you, he had told you about his wife that had died whilst he was still human, and how he blamed himself for it everyday, and he knew he couldn’t let it happen again. There was only one way to save you, and as his teeth sunk into your skin he whispered a soft apology to you. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“Where am I? Caius? What happened?” You asked, blinking what felt like sleep away from your eyes. 

“Oh my- You’re okay!” Caius cried, a wide smile plastered on his face as he wrapped his arms around you, stopping you from sitting up, “I was so, so worried I’d lose you, sweetheart. I’m so sorry.” 

“What are you sorry for?” You asked, with a soft chuckle. 

“Don’t you remember what happened?” He asked, stroking your cheek with his thumb, feeling devastated at how your once warm skin was now ice cold, like his. 

You shook your head, looking at him cluelessly. 

“That’s okay, you’ve only just woken up,” he said with a gentle smile as your now red eyes met his, “we have forever together now anyway, you got your way, darling.” 

“What happened to Bella? And Renesmee?” 

“They’re perfectly fine, my love.” He told you, “she isn’t what we suspected, Bella and the Cullens are fine.”

You let out a sigh of relief, and smiled up at Caius. 

“Can I hold you?” He asked, and you felt your tummy swarm with butterflies. 

“Yes please.” You grinned. 

He sat down beside you on the bed and pulled you towards him, wrapping his arms around you and placing his hands on your waist, pressing careful kisses to your forehead. 

“I love you.” He said, taking you by surprise. You turned your face to look at him, clearly he was joking! But as you looked at him you saw nothing but adoration in his eyes, “I’m never letting you leave my side ever again, okay? In all the years I’ve lived, I don’t think I’ve felt such fear as I did when I thought I was going to lose you.” 

“I’m not going anywhere, Caius,” you assured him, “I love you.” 

His hand that previously stroked your cheek came down to your chin, slipping his finger underneath and capturing your lips with his. As he kissed you, you moved slightly, so you were sat on his lap, straddling his hips as he held you against him, not breaking the kiss for the slightest moment now that you didn’t need to pause and catch your breath. “So when do you think we should start planning the wedding?” Caius asked, jokingly. However, you both knew that neither of you would be opposed to getting married, from the moment you first met him you knew he was special, there was something about him that you couldn’t help but fall in love with. However, you couldn’t believe that Caius, who was infamous for being the most cruel and sadistic member of the volturi, loved you, and he would do anything for you.

[hereforreadandwrite]

Chapter Two

Masterlist

A hundred winters had passed since the disappearance of Tyr.

A lot of things had changed in the meantime. Jormungandr had submerged himself in the Lake of Nine, drowning the temple of Tyr. You lived, or rather survived, day by day. You were trying to live without your beloved husband, but your life was meaningless without him. You did what you could to forget about him and move on. You had put all the things that Tyr had brought back in the cellar which you closed up, hiding the door behind your bookcase. You hid everything that could make you think of him.

To occupy your days, you spent your time outside the house. Strolling through the forest, taking care to stay within the protective field that Tyr had set up. In a hundred winters, you had never left the protective field. You were too afraid that Odin or one of his little dogs would be waiting for you outside. Now that Tyr was gone, nothing could stop the Allfather from finishing what he started.

But to your surprise, Fimbulvetr had started.

Which meant Baldur was dead and Ragnarok was near.

You had no role to play during Ragnarok. You just had to sit and wait for the Nine Realms to be devastated. Until a young man, accompanied by a man with extremely white skin and two dwarves approached your house. You were busy sharpening your arrows when you saw them approaching your garden. A young man accompanied by a dwarf that you knew only too well. Sindri, one of the two dwarves who made Mjolnir. You left your arrows, tightening your grip on your knife as you saw them approach.

“Take one more step and you will not leave this garden alive,” you said in a measured voice, glaring harshly at the intruders.

“S-sorry for disturbing you lady (Y/N),” Sindri apologized nervously as he hid behind the boy. "Good to see you again anyway. It's been a long time. You're still so young. It's your turn to talk, Atreus."

"Yes. You're (Y/N), right? Daughter of Mimir and Sigrun and a friend of Tyr?" asked the boy named Atreus. “I came to see you because we need your help.”

You looked at Atreus sternly before picking up an arrow, starting to sharpen it again under the uncertain eyes of your unwanted guests. Was it Sindri who told the boy about you? You had used their service a long time ago. He was the one who forged the sword that Sigrun gave you when you managed to beat Kara. But that was a long time ago now.

"I'm not that person anymore. (Y/N), daughter of Sigrun and Mimir died, a hundred winters ago now," you said, dipping the tip of the arrow into the fire. "I can't do anything for you, little one. Besides, how did you and the dwarf get past the protective barrier?"

"We…we managed to pass through a mystical door," Atreus replied. "(Y/N). Your father, Mimir, is alive. My father saved him from the tree where he was trapped. Well… in a way.

You froze upon hearing the words. Was Mimir alive? No it's impossible. If he were alive, he would have come to see you. Tears began to blur your vision. That stupid dwarf and that stupid boy dared to come to your house to say such a cruel thing to you. You slowly turned towards Atreus, making the boy flinch under the weight of your gaze. You stood up, slowly turning your body towards the teen who was backing away further. Sindri hurriedly stood between you and Atreus, apologizing for bothering you, but that the boy was telling the truth. Mimir was freed by a man named Kratos. You had enough. You turned your back on Sindri and Atreus, ordering them to leave before you do something you regret. You grabbed your arrows, hurrying back inside the house, slamming the door in Atreus' face and he started pounding on the door.

"(Y/N), please! We're looking for Tyr."

You felt your heart skip a beat. This boy had really just told you that Tyr was alive. You felt anger coursing through your veins. You turned back to the door, opening it forcefully. Atreus and Sindri jumped when they saw you leaving the house. They were surprised to see that your appearance had changed. Your eyes had turned black, your complexion was cadaverous and your veins were becoming black and visible. Sindri hurried to tell Atreus that they had to leave as quickly as possible. But the boy refused to listen to the dwarf.

"You dare to come to my house without invitation. You dare to tell me that the man I considered my father is alive. You dare to mock me by telling me that Tyr is alive! Tyr is dead! Mimir is dead! Everything everyone is dead!” you shouted, getting dangerously closer to Atreus who was retreating.

"N-no! They're alive. I… I have proof. If you came with me, I… I could show it to you and you… you could help us avoid Ragnarok, " Atreus explained as he held his hands out, showing that he was not a threat.

"No! You're just looking for a ghost and you're making fun of my pain. I've suffered enough and you dare to come and make fun. And you too Sindri!" you cried, pointing your knife at Sindri. "Don't think I've forgotten you! Don't think I've forgotten what you and your bastard brother did. I know it's because of you and your brother that Odin He took what was mine. I will never forget it."

"Lady (Y/N), I…I swear we didn't know Odin was planning on you…"

"Enough!"

You used your magic, creating a shockwave, which sent Atreus and Sindri out of your garden. The boy and the dwarf had no choice but to run away. You watched them go deeper into the forest before summoning your sword to search the surroundings. You didn't want to take any risks. You wouldn't be surprised if they were Odin's spies. You found the mystical door which collapsed. They had just entered the portal. How? It's been several years since you last used this door. It was surprising that it still worked. You groaned, turning your back on mystical door, heading back home.

Tyr would be alive?

What a ridiculous idea.

You would know if your husband were alive.

This boy, Atreus, had spoken of a clue. It was impossible. Odin would never have left any clues about his son. The Allfather was paranoid, especially regarding Tyre. It wouldn't make sense for Odin to leave traces.

You shook your head, pushing his thoughts out of your mind. You should no longer think about Tyre. You placed your sword on the table to start cooking, starting to heat up the rest of your stew. You ate your meal. Slowly chewing the pieces of meat. You found your food tasteless, as always. You've never been a great cook. It was always Tyr who took care of preparing the meals. During his travels, he learned many recipes and was happy to let you taste dishes from the countries he had visited. He especially made the decision to prepare meals when you tried to make a stew with deer meat, but the stew turned out to be a thick, inedible liquid. You couldn't help but smile as you remembered seeing him struggle for words so as not to hurt you.

It was another era.

You sighed, leaving the table to place the empty bowl in a bucket full of dirty dishes. You moved closer to the fireplace. You placed new logs there, rekindling the fire. You closed the shutters before undressing, finding yourself in your underwear. You wrapped the blanket around your body, letting yourself fall onto the bed. You buried your face in his pillow. You felt your mind slip into unconsciousness as a light laugh reached your ears. You cringed as you felt fingers brushing your tangled hair.

“Are you cold, my love?” asked Tyr, who was sitting on the edge of your bed. “I can put more logs in the fireplace.”

“No, I’m fine like that,” you said, burying your face further into your pillow. "We could stay like this right? Stay in this bed forever."

"Stick together. Yes. That would be nice," he said, kissing your cheek. "But we can't stay like this. We have to go hunting."

You sighed, leaving your warm bed to put on your warmest clothes. You took your bow and your quiver. Once ready, you followed Tyr out of the house. You set off with him into the forest, following the tracks of a deer that, according to your husband, could feed you for a whole week.

“Your sleep was restless last night too, my love,” said Tyr who walked in the lead. “Did you have a nightmare again?”

"I don't know if it was a dream or a nightmare. It's quite confusing. I thought I saw… wolves and… an eclipse, but I'm not so sure."

"Hm. A splint? It's been several winters since there was one like this," he said thoughtfully before stopping, kneeling down to examine the fresh marks. “This way.”

Tyr stood up, starting to walk again. You wanted to follow him, but your legs refused to move. Your gaze fell to your feet. They were held by roots. You called Tyr, but he had disappeared. You called out desperately as you felt the roots crawl up your legs. You grabbed an arrow, stabbing and cutting the roots. Once freed, you collapsed onto the ground, backing away from the roots. A scream escaped your lips when a flash of lightning tore the sky which turned red. What was happening? You approached, with a slow step, the edge of the cliff. The moon was hiding the sun. An eclipse. Like in your dream. You jumped when you heard grunts. You saw two pairs of eyes watching you through the trees. You wanted to run away, but your legs refused to obey you. What was happening?

“(Y/N).”

You jumped when you saw Tyr appear out of nowhere. The God of War was getting closer to you, his eyes and tattoos were luminous. A sign that he was using his magic.

"Tyr? What's going on?" you asked with a trembling voice.

“Time is of the essence my love,” he said, placing his hand on your head. "I need your help."

A scream escaped your lips as you felt the magic seep into your skull. You sat up with a start, holding your head and looking around you. Looking for Tyr. But unsurprisingly, you were alone. You placed your hand on your chest. Your heart was beating crazy fast.

This dream was really strange. Tyr was asking you for help? An eclipse? You shook your head, pushing his thoughts out of your mind. This boy had managed to put doubt in your mind. You sighed, leaving your bed to put on your warmest clothes. You reheated the stew, thinking about that dream and that boy.

Is Tyr really alive? What did this eclipse mean? What are these monsters lurking in the shadows? Why was this boy looking for your husband? Was Mimir really alive?

You shook your head, pouring what was left of the stew into your bowl. Calmly eating your meal which was always tasteless. A sigh escaped your lips. If you saw Tyr in your dreams and he asked you for help, that probably meant something, right? You cursed your weakness as you put on your warmest cloak, hanging your sword behind your back, leaving your home to find Atreus and Sindri. You went to the Lake of Nine, you were sure, at least, to find one of the dwarf brothers there or at least, one of their workshop. You walk through the forest. Leaving the protective barrier. You faced the cold of Fimbulvetr. You faced the Helwalkers who were trying to stop you.

When you arrived at the Lake, you were surprised and saddened to see that the statue of Tire was destroyed and there was a frozen lightning bolt in the middle of the huge frozen Lake. This flash meant only one thing: Thor had come to Midgard. You sighed, biting your lip nervously. Was he still around? You shook your head slightly. It was too late to turn back. You went down, treading the frozen lake. It's been so long since you've been here. You will travel across the lake, getting closer to what was the helmet of the statue of Tyre. You placed your hand on it, taking a deep breath. You were going to get answers. You walked away from the helmet, finding that stupid dwarf's workshop. You moved closer to the table. There was no one. But the embers were still hot.

“La-lady (Y/N)…?!” exclaimed Sindri who had just come out of nowhere. “It’s… it’s a surprise, and an honor, to see you here.”

“Think again, dwarf,” you said, leaning on the table. "You know some things that will piss me off. I know that. But you better tell me everything."

"About?"

The glare you gave Sindri made him understand what you were talking about. The dwarf stammered, searching for words, looking around nervously. You snapped your fingers under his nose, getting his attention.

“Consider the information I want as some sort of compensation for what you and your brother did to me,” you said through your teeth. “Where is the boy who accompanied you?”

"Fine, but… please don't start a fight in my house. The… the boy's father is there. With him. And he's quite protective of the boy."

"It'll be up to him. Hurry up."

You stepped aside from the workshop, allowing Sindri to pass through to activate the mystical door. Sindri went first. You walked through the door, arriving in a part of Yggdrasil you didn't know. There was a house embedded in the huge mystical tree. How long had he lived here? Sindri invited you to follow him inside. You entered the residence, surprising Brok who stopped hammering a sword.

“By Thor’s purses!”

“Still so rude,” you commented, examining the room. "Where is he?"

"Well… he…"

"What is going on?"

You turned to the man who had just entered the room. A muscular man, whose skin was as pale as a ghost, making his red tattoo stand out. He was armed with an ice axe. You held the gaze of the man who remained at a good distance. Watching for the slightest suspicious gesture. The tension was palpable.

“I assume you must be the father of the boy who came knocking at my door,” you said in a measured voice. "Where is he? He and the dwarf have some explaining to do."

"On which?"

“Given the question, you know exactly who I’m talking about,” you said, crossing your arms. "I just want his information. I don't want to fight. Trust me."

"That voice. Brother! Let me see our guest!"

You felt your heart skip a beat as you heard this voice that you would recognize in its Nine Realms. Kratos reached behind his back, unhooking a head from his belt and holding it out towards you.

"(Y/N)… daugther… you're there…"

You felt your heart racing. But that wasn't a good thing. Your breathing became erratic. You turned your back on Mimir. It was impossible. You must have been dreaming. Why would your father come back now? In this state? It must have been a trap. It must have been Odin playing a trick on you.

“This… this is another one of your tricks… is that it?” you asked, slowly turning towards Mimir and Kratos. “You’re trying to trick me again.”

"What? I… no! (Y/N). It's really me!" said Mimir. “I never set you up.”

"Ah of course!" You said looking in the direction. “So there are only traitors in this house.”

Sindri and Brok avoided looking at you, visibly ashamed. Noticing the dwarves' behavior, Kratos turned to them, asking what you meant. The Huldra brothers didn't know how to explain one of their biggest regrets. Sindri was the first to speak. Explaining that one day, Odin came to see them so that they could make him a weapon capable of cutting anything. Wanting to impress the Allfather, they obeyed. They are created a scythe capable of cutting anything. That satisfied Odin, but what they didn't know was that Odin had planned to cut off and steal your wings. Sindri and Brok looked at their feet, ashamed. You snorted seeing the behavior of the Huldra brothers.

It was pitiful.

“But the worst part of this story,” you said, looking at Mimir. "It's all your and Mother's fault. It was you two who sent me back to Midgard! Neither of you ever came to see me! You abandoned me! "

"No! No daugther! That's not true! Sigrun and I just wanted to protect you from Odin's madness! Look what he did to me! He imprisoned me shortly after you left Asgard. "

“That’s another lie.”

"No, he's not lying," Kratos said, taking a few steps forward. "I found Mimir trapped in a tree. On top of a mountain. The only way to free him was to decapitate him and ask Freya to resurrect him."

You looked at Kratos with a glare. This guy seemed to be telling the truth. You sighed rolling your eyes as you moved closer to the table to lean against it. Looking at Kratos, the Huldra brothers and your father with disdain.

"Let's assume that it's true. Let it not be a trap from Odin. That doesn't explain the fact that a boy knocked on my door to tell me about Tyr. I want to hear his explanations and know everything that he was able to find it."

Kratos turned towards a closed door. He ordered his son to come out of the room and come explain. Atreus opened the door, smiling nervously at his father who gave him a stern look. The young man moved closer to his father, greeting you with a nod.

"You went to see this woman. Without telling me," Kratos growled, glaring at his son severely.

"It… it was to ask for his help. I thought…"

"You thought?"

"Yes, I… I found out she was a friend of Tyr's. I… I thought she might know where he is."

“It was stupid to think that,” you said, moving closer to Atreus. “It’s been more than a hundred winters since Tyr died.”

“But… I found clues that say otherwise,” Atreus replied, taking out his notebook and handing it to you. “Look.

You took the boy's notebook, reading the notes that talked about your husband. According to his notes, Atreus saw Tyr imprisoned, but he did not recognize the place. The clues he found spoke of black smoke and bleeding earth. You turned your back on the group of men, thinking over his clues. It couldn't be Niflheim. There was the black mist, but this land didn't bleed so it could only be Svartalfheim.

"Black smoke and bleeding earth. It can only be Svartalfheim," you said, turning to face the father and son. "Odin has held the dwarves under his rule for centuries and my father did something that created this black smoke. Isn't that right Mimir?"

“Yes,” Mimir replied sadly.

"If all this is true. If there is someone locked up in Svartalfheim, it can't be Tyr. At least, it can't be him anymore. Even he would go crazy if he was locked up and tortured by Odin all this time. this time," you said, returning the notebook to Atreus. "I don't know your intentions, but Odin won't let you. It wouldn't be surprising if it was a trap."

“She is not wrong,” Mimir replied.

“What do you recommend?” Kratos asked.

"Not to go. But I don't think you're going to listen to me, are you?"

“Are you… are you coming with us?” Atreus asked, looking at you surprised.

"I know Svartalfheim. The dwarves will run away when they see a muscular guy arrive with a severed head hanging from his belt. They will say to themselves that Odin sent one of his men to kill them. And they will not be happy when they see Mimir again . Especially after what they did to them."

Atreus turned to Katos. He shook his head slightly, showing that this was not the time to ask questions. Your attention was caught by Sindri. The dwarf had just placed your sword on the counter. You picked up your weapon, checking the blade. It pained you to admit it, but Sindri still had talent. You made the sword disappear before Atreus' amazed eyes. The young man asked you what magic you used to make your weapon disappear and reappear as you wish. Your response was to tell him that it was none of his business. You looked at Kratos, asking him if he was ready to leave. Kratos grunted; The God of War walked towards the door. You followed the father and son out of Sindri's house. Kratos activated the mystical access before being interrupted by the Huldra brothers. Apparently, access to the Kingdom of Svartalfheim was blocked. Luckily, they had created a machine capable of unblocking the access, they were just missing the bifröst and the head. Brok unhooked the bifröst and Mimir from Kratos' belt, placing everything on their strange machine. Sindri calibrated the machine when a ray of light hit Mimir's face, causing Brok to laugh. When Mimir's bifröst's eyes were charged, Sindri hurried to aim for the door. Bifröst's ray struck the mystical door, opening a passage. Brok and Sindri hurried to fix everything, opening a passage to Svartalfheim.

You clenched your fists, taking a deep breath. This was going to be the moment of truth.

You were finally going to know if your husband was alive.

Tag: @ladycrowsworld

[otomelavenderhaze]

I can't stop thinking about the cave dialogue in which Rayan talks about Chloé, his ex wife, therefore I went back to read whole scene back from University Life episode 8, because what Rayan describes in episode 17 of LL is too diferent from that UL episode and from everything I could remember about it.

It's not to say that I caught some sort of insane discrepancy and AHÁ!

It's more because I find it interesting and I thought maybe others would find it interesting as well. So first I wanna show you what Rayan says in episode 8 of UL (which I never translated before until this post):

In my playthrough of it, back in the day, I asked him directly if he have a wife, which he answers yes first and then the proceeds to talk about it...

"And she will forever be my wife. But the last time we saw each other was seven years ago. Already… seven years… My wife, Chloé, died seven years ago. In a terrorist attack. Some savages came in shooting. No fixed target. In shop windows, in people and even in children."

"There were many wounded, and fortunately few dead. But Chloé is one of those who didn't survive… All that happened seven long years ago. It took me time. At first I didn't want to move. I wanted to keep everything, the smallest memory."

Now why I am showing this 4 panells?

This is important to understand how she died, how sad Rayan showed us to be about her death and his attachment towards Chloé.

He even goes as far to say:

"We met in high school and we got married at 23, in a hurry. We didn't tell anyone. But I'm not going to lie to you and say that everything was all roses."

Candy asks him, how so?

"We often quarreled. We stayed together for a long time, we didn't get to know anyone but each other and, sometimes, we even doubted. But when she left… I was torn apart."

Now we will never know why they used to fight, what made them marry so young and so quickly to the point where he implies they didn't even had a wedding ceremony.

Which makes this difficult to understand what compelled both of them to take such actions - maybe they they were just impulsive, but without a reason behind such impulsivity it's hard to tell if it was warrant or not.

But then, the actual panel that made me do this post in the first place eventually comes up in that same conversation with Candy:

"I loved her with all my soul. Before anything else, she was my best friend. But, sorry… I opened up too much…"

And I believe he did, regardless of anything else, because it makes sense for Rayan's character to marry someone for love.

That's the kind of "person" he is, that's why when he falls for Candy, he's ready to assume so many risks and even later talks about leaving his job for her just so they could have a less tense relationship.

This sets up him to be someone that would intensily love another person and do everything for them - they being Chloé or Candy.

I could say this is actually the point of that whole conversation: to show that he isn't someone that takes love lightly or shallowly, which helps us readers to trust his intentions and to believe that, yes, for love he would indeed be honorable, truth and passionate, instead of a player or a man that just wants to have fun with one of his students.

Not mentioning that he presents himself as a tortured soul that lost a wife tragically and never fell in love ever since, but falls in love for you, the reader, because you're special and irreplaceable, is something very flattering and, even, I dare say, romantic.

Meow meow is sad and you're the only one who can fix that for him.

Personally, I don't like how mcl writes grief, I don't think they know how to dose it without losing their hand, so it comes off as shallow for me, but I guess it serves as another thing: Chloe was loved by Rayan, but Candy needs to be special. The player needs to feel special.

Which brings us to this part of the conversation:

"Every women had something of her own. I saw her everywhere. And yet, it's been seven years. Since then, I have been unable to get involved with another woman, in a new relationship. Even in a simple friendship."

"Until… I met you. I don't know… For the first time, I met someone who has none of her. For the first time, I felt entitled not to think about her."

I understand why in an otome game is important to get the romance right and make the player feel compelled to play the character's route, after all, who wouldn't want to feel special, even if it's only on a game - that's why we have so many MCs or main characters in videogames that are heroes, that cares of others or the place they belong to.

However, I will say, maybe they should've worded it differently, maybe it's not so much about feeling entitled to not think about her, but when I realized, I wasn't searching for her traits on you, I wasn't thinking about her anymore, I was ready to move on. But this is just how I would've done it, just so it would come from Rayan the agency of the "healing" - in another words, he had healed himself before he met Candy and falling in love with her was just another evidence of that.

Which brings us back to episode 17 of Love Life, our Honeymoon episode (and pay attention to the parts that I will mark in blue):

"Y'know, I honestly didn't think I would get over losing her. And then after you got in my classroom and into my life. So, yes, I should have a star up there shining for me. Because, with you, I understood the meaning of true love. And it wasn't the same of what I had with Chloé."

"Sometimes, I think, if the story/timeline was another, if I had met you first before I met her... She and I would've been simply friends, without anything else between us. If fate hadn't been so cruel with her, it would've ended like that anyway, actually. I think she would have been happy to see me so happy these days."

"Just like I would have been in seeing her meeting someone else just as important as you're for me. And when I think of her today, is in this way: as a friend that left too soon. And that, of course, I still get a little with my heart tight. She was someone wonderful/beautiful. There's still some of her in me. But, when I met you, I was like a ghost."

Only Rayan to friendzone the dead.

"Thanks to you and our love, she just became a beautiful star, just like my father..."

At first I thought he was saying that he never really loved Chloé and that Candy made him realize that (How? Don't ask me, he doesn't say how), but thinking about this post and re-reading everything made me rethink my first impression of it.

It's not so much that he didn't loved Chloé, but admittedly, and for reasons that Rayan didn't say, he thought love was something else and he thought he loved her because of that notion, and then his notion of love changed because he met Candy and now he thinks that love is truly what he feels for Candy.

I, as someone that played all of his route, can't really say or even figure out how he would've come up with that reasoning.

Was it because for the first time ever, he had put someone else on his top priority, or at least in a more important position than his reputation and career (which he deeply cares for)? But wasn't he a passionate person to begin with? So isn't it natural for him, once he was sure he fell in love for Candy, to put her as his top priority?

Was it Candy presence alone in his life, simply being there, what made him create that notion? How she taught him that?

I don't know, because the way they fell in love was pretty quick and pretty normal I would dare say - normal not in the sense of, he was her teacher, normal in the sense there was nothing remarkable about their dates, the way they sneak around or in their conversations.

I think if he had realize that falling in love with someone new meant that he had "healed" from his past trauma, that he only had feelings for her because he was ready to have feelings for someone again and the sense of normalcy and easiness he felt in being with her was all he ever wanted after going through so much sadness and heartbreak, then, it would make more sense and sound more realistic, maybe?

But again, they wanted to spin that Candy was special, she needed to be the one that changed him, that was like gravity to him and he could not resist the pull of her.

“... It's just that, with you, I never got under the impression of playing any kind of game. Because I had a lot to lose. Before I met you, I had accepted to never love again. I didn’t want to ever risk lose someone ever again... And, above all, you came to enroll in my course. I looked up and knew that my certainties were worthless...” (episode 14 LL)

That's why I talked about his career before.

They set up Rayan to be someone that loves his work, that cares about his reputation and his career, if not, as he only thing he had since he moved away from his family and was living alone.

Risk it all for Candy was to show that he wasn't playing, he wasn't just trying to get a kick out of it.

And knowing how he got after when Marina actually got him fired, how much of a mess it made him, this put things even more in context, it shows that truly, risk it all for her was no joke, even thou, they used to be pretty reckless about it (never gonna forget their first kiss, crazy, both of them).

Which brings me to one of my favorite parts of dialogue in Rayan's route, episode 15 LL, the marriage proposal dialogue:

"It’s funny... for a long time I thought that love was like a burning fire. And I even thought that, in my case, all that was left was ashes of it. Until I met you and I understood that I didn’t know anything. That I have got it wrong in my whole life. With you, I understood that love is like a stream/flow. A wave that breaks again and again without stopping. And that drags everything wherever it goes. You imposed yourself on me like an evidence. In the calm. I knew it right away. But I only understood it this well later on."

Think that love was like a burning fire: it lights up, it shines bright, it consumes itself, then it becomes ashes and there's nothing left of it.

Ouch, Rayan. 😢

Not to mention the destructive nature of fire, but I don't think Rayan or the person who wrote this scene thought it like that necessarily, I think it had more to do with how fragile and how it consume itself, which feels more how like I would expect from how Rayan described his relationship with Chloé before: intense, too quick to think everything through, the fighting, the feeling that it wouldn't last anyway.

Meanwhile Candy is like a strong wave or a strong stream, his love for her dragged everything with it: all his reasoning, his principles and scruples, the risk of losing his reputation, his career, AND breaking again and again, because it didn't matter if he had build any walls to keep her out in the begining, she somehow brought it all down.

Two kinds of love, one feeling less truth and lasting than the other.

While it would've better, in his head, to have remain just a friendship with Chloé, with Candy, there was no way for it to have ended just in friendship, it would always be more.

You can see the contrast between his feelings for Chloé and his feelings for Candy, how it was different and the key word should always be different.

It surprised me to see him talking about their wedding too, Rayan and Chloé married young and in a hurry (we will never know why), meanwhile, Rayan found Candy in a stage of his life when love wasn't even in the table and when it finally came back to the table, Rayan wanted everything, he wanted celebrate it having a proper wedding ceremony and all.

But those are little subtle things that they left out in the air, instead of saying it so clearly like they did so many times before.

Personally, I don't think would've make any sense for Rayan's character to haven't love Chloé, considering they built a life together before he even met Candy, the same way, I don't think we could've ever thought that Rayan loved Chloé more or even the same way he loved Candy.

Cuz, Chloé and Candy not only met him in different moments of his life BUT ALSO, they totally two different women, it would go without saying it.

But I guess, they wanted to make it even more screaming that it was the case, which I can understand why.

I mean, people thought that Rayan had really tried something with Marina, outside of his route: which for those people I always told it would be impossible.

It would go against what they presented to us about him during that first dialogue in episode 8 of UL and it would represent a contradiction in the writing itself. It would bend the rules that they set themselves to follow too grotesquely. Not to mention, MCL never gave other love interests to the Lis that stayed on the side lines.

Unless, of course, they had set things up that we would understand that Marina was such a special existence is moving like Candy - which, okay, I could've accepted it, but they didn't so. That's why I was so sure of it.

Y'know, have to read so much back in his route to make this post made saying goodbye to his route so hurtful but also so fulfilling, I always loved how they wrote him, despite having my criticisms, I am happy that I got to experience Rayan's route from the start to end.

If you haven't played his route like ever, I totally I encourage you to do it now that we got it all. xD