#and b) a lot of yelling! maybe even some rudeness!

[serpentinegraphite]

in the same vein as having characters always sound like they're trying to get a good grade in therapy, a common thing in fanworks that gets on my nerves is like how in a fandom where realistically one might expect the characters to experience some trauma as a result of canon events (even though it's not shown in canon), there are only ever like the most extreme trauma responses. it's full on panic attack in the face of a trigger and brutal, unending nightmares, and like nothing else.

I just want to say for anyone out there who isn't aware, not every trauma response needs to be turned up to 11!some days a trigger might hit harder than others.

sometimes a character's trauma response should say something about them! a character who hates being vulnerable and seeks a constant control might react to a trigger with anger!

a character who is great at repressing might "This is fine!" themselves all the way through a triggering and unpleasant encounter rather than show any outward distress! dissociation is a real and common trauma response.

aside from the complete homogenization of trauma symptoms being boring as shit, it's often a weirdly consistent Moral Purity signifier. there's never a chance for a nuanced or complicated or shitty response to a trigger, it's always straight into the harshest panic response, thereby inviting only unconditional support from the audience. (nevermind what this kind of weirdly narrow anxiety rep does to people in the audience who actually have anxiety that doesn't fit the One Kind Of Anxiety characters are allowed to have)

[keravnous]

bathroom b!tch; tangerine/fem!reader (smut; 18+)

part two | part three | part four

playlist: train quickie with tangerine

Tangerine meets you in one of the bathrooms on the bullet train. He just wants to clean up after his tussle with Ladybug and get rid of the blood, but he could use you to blow off some steam as well. You know: he has to take it if he sees it.

word count: 5,9k

warnings: mirror sex, bathroom sex, semi public, fingering, oral (female receiving), blood (it's tangerine's), squirting, dry humping, rather rough sex, unprotected sex, light choking, confined spaces, dirty talk, name calling, kinda a quickie?, tangerine's a little rude but surprisingly gentle too idk he's just like that, he just needs to fuck the adrenaline outta himself, i have very strong feelings about this angry man

title is from the song of the same name, bathroom bitch by holychild

also thank you v for a) helping me out with Japanese and b) by telling me what being a passenger on a bullet train feels like

You knew it was a bad idea.

Starring at yourself in the impressively clean mirror of the small bathroom, you try your best to hold back any fresh tears.

You knew that a long-distance relationship wouldn't work. You fucking knew it and yet you accepted your fiancés pleas to Just try it. Maybe, it indeed would've worked out if he wasn't fucking his bloody secretary.

You regret leaving London. You miss your home.

You're not even that heartbroken, you just feel exhausted, like you wasted an awful lot of time.

You take a long, good look at yourself. Bloodshot eyes and a sad hue resting over your pupils, turning the colour dark and deep. The dress, that you bought for your anniversary brunch – a surprise, quite as much as the one he gave you, when you walked in on him, balls deep in his secretary – now looks oddly strange, out of place on you. You feel overdressed and ashamed, foolish.

But there’s something else, too: the loneliness that followed suite after your screaming, after fighting with him - after breaking up with him. It's been there since you boarded the train to Nagoya but now it rolls over you like a wave of-

Thump, thump.

"What the fuck", you mutter, taking a ragged breath, before yelling out, "Occupied!"

You just want to be left at fucking peace, not being watched by other passengers as you're bawling your eyes out. All you want is to get off that train and burn some of that fucker’s money on a spontaneous vacation. All you want is for the remaining days in Japan to be good ones.

Another sharp knock follows. This one rattles the door.

It takes a moment for you to scramble for the right words, the ones you have picked up when visiting your fiancé before. "Shiyouchu!"

Another knock. And another.

Motherfucker.

You clench your teeth - saying goodbye to the precious moments of crying in silence for the year you've lost to the most useless relationship of all fucking mankind - and wipe away the wetness below your eyes to open the door. "I said-"

Oh.

Oh shit.

There's a very handsome man waiting outside the door. He is towering over you, impatience plastered on his face and seeping through his every movement, with the way he's leaning against the door frame.

He's hot.

Also, he's dripping in blood.

His light blue shirt, once crisp and clean, is now disshelved and just as stained as his expensive looking dark-blue vest.

"Jesus, fuck, are you alright?", you blurt out.

The man's raising an eyebrow. "Could be asking you the same, love. Now, would you please get the fuck outta there."

He's moving towards you, closing in the last few inches separating the two of you. Your gaze is focused on the nasty cut on his arm.

"You're bleeding", you say dumbly.

His eyes shoot up at you and for a split-second you feel like you are face to face with a predator. The anxiety, that the blood and his rude behaviour sparked in your chest, sends adrenaline pumping through your veins and has the muscles your legs preparing for fight or flight. He blinks.

"I know", he says and his lips curl up to something, that you're convinced is supposed to be a smile, "Now, if ya'd be so kind?"

He gestures behind you, towards the empty bathroom.

"No?", you say, voice shooting up a little, which immediately has him cautiously throwing a glance down the hall to his right, "No, I won't! You need help, how the fuck -- what the fuck happened?"

"You're starting to really get on my fuckin’ tits, pretty thing. Would y'just let me the fuck inside?", he growls, tilting his head towards you. His tone has the hairs on your arms rising, as he is starring you into the ground.

You back up, colliding unpleasantly with the doorframe, that nearly drills itself into your left shoulder.

"Thank you, Lady", he's squeezing past you and then turns around again, giving you a quick one-over. You are unable to move, mesmerized by the way he's looking at you.

The corners of his mouth tilt up again and one of his hands, a little sticky and red with his own blood, comes up to his face, straightening his moustache, as his gaze runs over your body once more. You should leave, you should run - clearly, something is awfully and so not right but you just can't, being glued to the spot by his eyes.

It shouldn't make your loins grow hot, but you can't help it. You feel your belly tingle, shooting sparks down down down between your legs. He is very attractive and the aura of pure fucking danger that wafts around him doesn’t do what it normally should do – instead, it pulls you in. Oh, aren’t you just fucked.

"What were y'saying about help, again?", the man murmurs, gaze locking with yours.

"Uuuh", it's a very stupid sound you make and his eyes spark up at that, lips giving room to flash some teeth, "I-I just said you look like you might need some help?"

"Well, maybe I do."

He licks his lower lip and you blink, gaze following the movement.

This is very stupid. This is risky, dangerous, and most likely something you are going to regret.

It's not only the situation, it's him, too. He seems dangerous. It's not only the blood, mind you. It’s the way he moves, how his eyes dart through the room, over your body. It’s the aggression in his voice that he’s trying to hide, cover up but ultimately fails, something that seeps through every pore of him.

But he's also just ridiculously hot, walking with his crotch first, heavy northern British accent swirling the words around his tongue and, fuck, it's mostly the way he's looking at you.

And you're just so fucking full of anger and grief and your life feels strangely directed and determined by your shitty-ass fiancé and there's so much rage and sadness -

You take a step into the bathroom and the door slides shut behind you.

"Good", he hums, "Because you do look, like you could also use some help."

The door locks behind you and take another step forward, approaching him. "You have no fucking idea", revenge sex is a very stupid concept but now, it seems very tempting. It's exciting and makes you feel oddly alive.

"Did'ya get dumped?", and you don't know why you trust him with that information but you can hear yourself say: "Cheated on. Fiancé of twelve months." There is a hand sneaking around your waist, pulling you in closer. You can smell him now, the blood on his skin and clothes, the heavy scent of his perfume – it’s warm and thick, vanilla and fruit, like an orange grove.

"Allow me the comment - that's one bloody stupid bastard."

You look up at him and blink. That man's insanely pretty and you swallow as he pulls you in even closer, your hand connecting with his chest. It is firm and warm and your fingers get a little sticky with the fresh blood on his shirt. They splay out, feeling the firm muscle flex beneath the expensive fabric.

"How much time d'we have, sugar?", he hums, runs his thumb across your lower lip.

"I have to get off in Nagoya."

"Gonna get you off alright now, sweetie", you roll your eyes at that and he chuckles, "Bit more than half'n hour I'd say. Think we can manage that?"

You nod while biting your lip, adrenaline thick and heavy in your veins, pumping your blood down south and making you wet wet wet, and he laughs at that, runs his tongue along his bright, bright teeth.

It's sheer excitement that has your belly tingle and you lock your eyes with his, the darkening blueish green pulling you in and then he leans down, locks his lips with yours.

They are soft and warm and his moustache tingles a little. You hum against his lips, one hand fisting his vest as the other sneaks up his muscular arm, runs over and through the blood, up up up next to the cut and comes a halt on his neck. The hand on your waist holds you close, fingers spread out delicately as he starts to feel you up.

His tongue darts out and licks over your lips and you gladly give him more room, parting your lips slightly. He's pushing in, licking into your mouth. You hum deep in your throat, pressing against him, tasting the cigarette smoke on his lips.

You can feel the bulge in his pants, his dick pressing hotly against your lower belly. It ignites your loins, pleasure shooting through your abdomen.

You moan into his mouth and he responds by pushing you back, heaving you up the small sink, deepening the kiss. Your back presses against the mirror as you clutch onto him, hand running up his neck and into his hair, slick with product and a little sticky with sweat. Your knees hit his hipbones and the man starts to roll his hips into yours, having his hard dick rubbing against your crotch and your eyelids flutter with the feeling. He's rock-hard and so so hot through his dress pants and you can't fucking wait to get to it.

He eventually breaks the kiss, breath ragged as his eyes roam over your face, hands feeling your thighs up. You decide that you need more of him and thus, your free hand roams over his chest, fingers making quick work of his vest. As soon as you pop the last button, he hastily tears it off of himself, throws it to the ground where it lands with a quiet thud.

"C'mon sweetheart, I know you clammin' to touch me", he says, voice deep and raspy and you do - like you're on fucking autopilot. Your hands dart out, roaming over his defined chest. He feels nice and firm and makes you want him more, want to feel all of him, all at once.

He hums quietly, as you open a few buttons of his shirt and run your hands over the sweaty, warm skin, through the dust of fine chest hair, making his chain rustle. He feels nice and it makes you want him.

The man looks up from your hands and you don't know what has come over you as your hand glides up further, cupping his neck, thumb on his jawline. "Fuck me", you breathe, "Fuck me 'til I can't walk."

He grins and leans in even closer, his clothed and hard dick pressing against your wet panties, as he's kissing a wet trail from your jaw to your ear. "Who would've thought - such a naugh'y lil'mouth on such a pretty woman."

You hook one leg around his waist, tugging lightly at the hair that's curling in his neck as he starts to suck on your neck. The slight pain ignites your lust, has arousal blooming and wetness pooling between your legs. You want to tell him to stop, before he marks you up for good as --

"Name's Tangerine", he suddenly rasps, as his tongue rubs over the spot he has been sucking on and you're pretty damn sure that he just gave you a hickey.

"Like the-"

"The fucking fruit, yeah. 'M gonna burst you more like something of a cherry, though", he rumbles, quietly laughing to himself with his fingers digging into your hips.

Your breath hitches in your throat as he presses himself flush against you - all firm muscles, perfume, and hot skin - tongue licking over your throat like the hot blade of a knife, dancing over your jaw.

It's most likely not his real name and that should really, really alert you. But it doesn't - instead you surrender yourself to him, letting your head fall back and parting your legs, inviting him in.

And the man -Tangerine - follows suite and shoves your dress up up up, runs his hands over your now exposed thighs. You lean forward a little, until your lips brush over his. "Name's Y/N", you whisper and his eyes glint a little at that, "Pleasure to meet you."

"Oh, you gon' be a fun one", he grins and you do too, before leaning in and kissing him again. He is less gentle now, keen on getting you hot, his kisses turn sloppy quickly, biting your lower lip and licking into your mouth until you lack air. The thumbs on your legs dive in deeper, until they connect with your crotch. And then, one of them gently runs over your soaked panties.

Tangerine breaks the kiss, wet lips brushing over the corner of your mouth, only to inhale sharply - keeps his cheeks puffed theatrically for a short moment, then exhales just as sharply, eyeing you up and down. "Jesus Christ, that pussy of yours s'fucking wet, innit?", he rumbles and two of his fingers run over the wet fabric once more, slowly starting to rub your clit.

You gasp, hips bucking a little and you watch the way his hand vanishes under the hem of your dress. "Fuck", you moan quietly as he quickly finds the spot that makes your thighs clench. He rubs you through your panties, soft lace turning wet wet wet and dampening his skin. Your mouth falls agape seeing his wrist twitching between your legs and the way he's looking down at it, a little mesmerized, makes your head swim. Then, he stops.

"Yeah, let's get those off", he mutters, more to himself than to you and then he's tugging at the straps of your panties, riiips the lace and tears them apart. "Oh-", you gasp unintelligently as he carelessly drops them to the ground and you really don't fucking mind at all.

It's the first time in a long time that you feel wanted, like someone's actually hungry, greedy for you. And it turns you on. A lot. It is like Tangerine has flipped a switch and you want him just as much as he seems to want you. And you want it now.

You blink at him through your lashes. "You gonna touch me now?"

"Easy, love", he chuckles, genuinely amused and then his fingers are slooowly creeping back over your legs, until his index finger finally touches your exposed cunt. The touch is cold, but not unpleasant and you suck in a sharp breath, one that hitches in your throat.

He watches you, as he runs it over your pussy, quickly joined by a second, digits running up and down, spreading your slick. You hum, pleasure building up in your abdomen and then, finally, his fingers return to your clit.

Slow, wide circles spread your lips apart, making you moan and throwing your head back in pleasure. His bracelet clinks as he quickly picks up a faster rhythm, keen on seeing you coming loose, circles growing smaller.

"Oh shit, yes that's fucking it", you can feel arousal building in your stomach, shooting through your body. Tangerine laughs under his breath and his lips are onto you again, licking and sucking over your straightened neck. You don't give a fuck anymore, the slight pain of him bruising your skin makes your hips buck and rolling against his digits.

"Such a good girl, ain't ya?, he groans against your neck and it sends shivers down your spine as you're moaning and gasping, nodding frantically.

Your body feels like it has been ignited, with the way his fingers rub your clit, teasing your pussy and then there's one finger circling your hole and fuck, you really fucking need it. You spread your legs farther and Tangerine puuushes in, sinks one rather cold finger in your hole, your hot hot skin meeting the cold gold of his ring.

Tangerine starts to fuck you slowly, finger pushing in and out of you, until you're loose enough to take a second one. His rings thrust against your hole every time he pushes them back inside and the sensation has you whining, his lips still glued to your neck, occasionally moving down down down to you cleavage, licking fat stripes over your warm, sweaty skin.

A flood of very good, very dangerous emotions has one of your hands abandoning the sink, instead running up his arm, splaying across his shoulder. You can feel the muscles working slightly beneath the light blue fabric, a little dampened by his sweat. "Fuck, you make me so hot, shit, that feels so good", you whimper quietly, gasping as his fingers push even deeper. It seems to kick Tangerine off, moustache grazing your skin as he’s picking up an even faster rhythm - rubbing, circling your clit faster, adding more pressure - obscene squelching sounds filling the air of the small bathroom. You moan as pleasure shoots up your spine, has you rocking on and against his fingers.

You can feel your walls clenching around his fingers, hole fluttering against the cold, golden rings and then --

He breaks from your throat and whistles lowly as fresh wetness pools around his fingers, your squirt dampening his golden bracelet and the cuff of his shirt.

Tangerine pulls his fingers out of you slowly, slick with your juices and looks at them for a few seconds, the way your wetness is glistening on his skin in the dim lights. He brings them up up up, gaze connecting with yours and then -

They go past his lips, as his tongue darts out and licks them clean. You blink - once, twice. "Fuck", you breathe, and he chuckles.

"You taste like a fuckin' dream, love", his hands push your legs further apart and before you know it, he sinks down to his knees. You blink at him, as he lifts the hem of your dress up, "Might wanna hold that f'me", and you do, pulling the fabric as high up as you can, exposing yourself to him further.

Tangerine tsks as he takes the sight in and you can feel your cheeks growing hot, burning red, as his fingers dance over your pussy.

"Don't ya just have the prettiest cunt?", he hums, running his fingers through your folds, "'M gonna fuck ya so good."

"Jesus, Tangerine", you huff out, legs shaking a little as his thumb carefully rubs over your clit.

Tangerine looks up at you, smirking a little and then he's leaning in, hands coming to rest on your thighs, forcing your legs apart. He's not breaking eye contact, keeps your gazes chained together, as he dives in and licks a long, fat stripe from your hole upwards to your clit.

You fucking mewl, as his moustache rubs over your sensitive skin, tongue circling your clit for a short moment. His eyes gleam up at you, watching your reaction as his tongue swipes down, over your folds to your hole, teasing it. It has your legs kicking a little and you grab the sink with both your hands, as your thighs give a quick shake.

You can hear him chuckle deep in his throat and it makes you hot hot hot all over, with the way his tongue crawls back up, lips grazing your cunt and then he's onto your clit once more, gently lapping at it, placing soft kisses on the sensitive skin.

A strangled noise escapes your throat as arousal rushes through your abdomen and up up up your whole body, has your chest heaving with a ragged breath and rolling your hips forward. It's so so good, but not enough - you just need more.

"Don't ya move, love", Tangerine rasps and one of his hands grabs your hips forcefully, dress sliding up to your navel as he's holding you in place. The other crawls up your lower leg and thigh, teasing your folds and then one finger presses against your hole, pushes in roughly.

You moan as he immediately starts to fuck you with it, pumping your wetness in and out of you with a rather merciless rhythm, keen on having you come for him, having you squirt once more.

His eyelids flutter, long and dark lashes against his pale skin as his tongue licks over your folds, tasting your wetness and taking your scent in. You're tasting so so sweet to him, like a fucking forbidden fruit that he's going to devour anyways, because he can and he will and because fuck the rules he had set himself for this job.

He closes his eyes as he pushes a second finger into you, pumping them in and out of you, while his tongue laps at your cunt, lips closing in around your folds, gently sucking. His fingers are fucking you fast now, pushing you further and further.

"Oh god", you gasp, one hand still holding your own weight, the other now fisting his hair, pulling it. It seems to spur him on, hooking one of your legs over his shoulder and placing wet, open-mouthed kisses on your cunt, gently nibbling at the soft skin as his finger pumps into you. It's even better than before, with his beard scratching you and his tongue and lips gliding over your cunt as if it were a riddle he's going to solve without his hands. The heel of your shoe digs into his back - desperate for any leverage, to just feel him - as you are nearing your release.

"Shit, fuck fuck fuck", your voice sounds strange in your ears, high-pitched and far far away, between the squelching sounds that his rapidly moving fingers pull out of your pussy, "I'm gonna-"

He hums and then, after a short moment, pulls his digits out of you and grabs your hips hard, holding you in place, not stopping his tongue from rubbing over your cunt hard.

It tips you over the edge, has you breaking loose. You gasp loudly, throwing your head back against the mirror, incoherent rambling leaving your lips as you come - riding your orgasm out on his face as he licks you through your orgasm, your hips bucking wildly with it.

As your orgasm rolls over you, you already know that this isn't over. Usually, you would be spent for now, calm and a little tired but right now - you're not at all, lust still rolling over you, fresh wetness pooling between your legs again. "Mhm, shit", you breathe, feet kicking a little as Tangerine's tongue continues to flick over your clit. You are still wet, already desperate for more, more of him.

All you can think about is his hard dick, that you've felt earlier pressing against your crotch and pure want tingles in your stomach. Tangerine's lips close in around your throbbing clit, overstimulation making your head swim.

"Please, fuck, please", your hip bucks against his iron grip that holds you steadily against the sink. Tangerine looks up at you again and let’s go of your clit with an obscene pop. His moustache is dampened by your wetness as he grins up at you. "Please please", he mocks your high-pitched whines and then smirks, "Wan'it that bad, love?"

"Need you - ah, fuck - inside me. Oh, shit", you whine, as your hole clenches around nothing, desperate for more than his fingers. You are so turned on by this stranger, lust crashing over your body like waves - you can feel its tingle in your chest, your legs, feeling your pussy desperate for another touch.

Tangerine blinks for a moment and you're sure, that you saw his eye twitch and then he, very dramatically, takes a deep breath, closes his eyes. "Shit, love, you make me feel all sorts o'things", he says quietly and then quickly gets up, wipes his lips with the back of his hand.

He leans in and his lips lock with yours again and you can taste yourself on his tongue, as he licks into your mouth, grinning against your lips, damp stache rubbing over your upper lip. He licks over it, groans deep in his throat, while his hands brush over your legs, before he commands, whispers against your lips: "Bend over the sink f'me.”

"What?", you blink, words not really reaching you through the lustful haze that has wrapped your brain in like cotton candy. All you can do is look at him, at this very handsome stranger with the very fake name and he has your head swimming, brain giving in and surrendering to lust once more.

You take the hand he offers you as he helps you down the sink, your legs a little wobbly. "Alright c'mon now, girl, don't keep me waitin'", Tangerine gives you a light pat on the cheek, rings barely connecting with your skin - a patronizing gesture that has your knees going ever weaker for a moment as you try to turn around, hands gripping the edges of the sink.

You watch him in the mirror, as he makes quick work of his belt and the fly of his trousers. As he pulls his dick out, your mouth waters. It's long and big and has just the right girth, a drop of precum glistening on its tip. You'd really like to suck that cock, like right motherfucking now.

Tangerine looks at you. "Got all hungry fo'it?", and you nod - breathing out Fuck yeah - arching your back for him, "Alright love, just a minute."

He spits in his hand and rubs the saliva over his dick, giving himself one, two strokes. You arch your back, keeping your eyes on him as he grabs your hips hard, lines himself up, head of his dick resting against your hole - all hot and hard - and then he finally, finally pushes himself in. The stretch is nice and has you squirming a little with the dull pain, excitement lighting your nerves up.

"Jesus Christ", his head falls forward a little, "You're so fuckin' tight."

He bottoms out, forcing himself in deep, holding still. You can feel his dick twitching inside of you, but he doesn't move and you can see his chest heaving, hear him grunt. His hand roams over your bare ass, shoving the dress even higher, until your back is partly exposed and his hand creeps around your body, over your stomach and under the dress, slips beneath your bra and cups one of your tits.

Tangerine squeezes it, feels you up and then pulls his dick back out only to quickly push himself back in. The sound that leaves your throat is nothing but desperate and your hand grips the sink harder, knuckles slowly turning white. His jaw is going a little slack as he rolls his hips into you, fucking you slowly.

"Ah shit", he groans, a deep and coarse sound, that makes you shiver, "Doesn't that just feel lovely?"

He watches the way his dick pumps into your pussy, eyebrows drawn together, lips slightly agape - until his gaze meets yours in the mirror once more and there it is - a shadow that dances over his eyes, turning the mesmerizing blue and green dark dark dark. One of his hands suddenly darts forward, rings glimmering in the dim light, only to roughly grab your chin, forcefully holding your head in place. It hurts a little, but the pain feels good, the way it stretches your back and intensifies the arch of it, forces you to look at him and yourself. Your mascara is pooling beneath your eyes, pupils blown wide and cheeks reddened.

"Would'ya just look at yourself", Tangerine groans, "Ya might be the hottest fucking thing I've seen in a long fuckin' time --" He groans again, thumb catching your lower lip and you moan as you watch his face coming a little loose with pleasure.

Tangerine picks up a faster rhythm, thrusting into you and you push your hips back, meeting him - desperate for more more more. He grins at you in the mirror and his hand creeps a little lower, until it rest riiight below your jawline and then -

Then he squeezes.

It has you gasping, choking a little at the sudden loss of air and the feeling of your windpipe being closed. Your hip bucks against his and he licks his lips.

The lack of air has adrenaline rushing through your veins once more, as his dick pushes against your spongy hot walls and you feel your body surrendering to him fully, the small voice in the back of your head remembering you that You are at his mercy has you growing even wetter.

The hand lets go off your throat, now gently holding your head in place and you suck in a few deep breaths, gasping, greedily sucking in the air, as --

There must be a bump on the rails, as the wagon suddenly lifts a little and has you thrown forward towards the mirror, shoves his dick deeper into you. You moan, instinctively catching his eyes in the mirror.

His lips are slightly parted, eyes darkened by lust and his fingers dig into the flesh of your hips. The train speeds up just as he leans forward, throws his chest against your back. His body is so so hot against yours and your walls flutter around his dick, as his scent wraps you in once more.

Tangerine lowers his head, until his forehead rests on your shoulder, cock twitching inside of you. "Ya have no bloody idea what'cha doin' to me, Lady", he says, voice coarse and dark and your eyelids flutter, "'M gonna ruin ya."

He lifts his head a little and your gazes connect in the mirror once more. A shiver runs down your spine - he means it.

And you feel it, too, as he thrusts into you once, knocks the air out of your lungs with the sheer force of it. The tip of his dick hits the spot perfectly and you nearly cry out in pleasure, hands gripping the sink tightly. There are small lines forming around his eyes as he's grinning against your shoulder, pulls out a little only to force himself back in, even deeper this time. The hand that was toying with your tit leaves, crawls back down and his arm wraps itself around your waist, holds you close.

Your legs shake as Tangerine picks up a faster rhythm, starts pounding in to you like a starved man, like an animal gone wild. It's in his eyes, hunger hunger hunger and you feel pleasure shooting through your body, pooling in your abdomen. You squirt against his dick, wetting the trimmed pubic hair as his balls slap against your wet skin.

You suck in a sharp breath, a strangled high pitched whiny moan escaping your lips, as he hits your walls again, tip of his dick brushing over your g-spot, having you seeing stars. Your eyelids flutter, gasps escaping your mouth with every one of his thrusts.  

"Be fuckin' loud, you lil'slut, I don't care - one - bit", he says through gritted teeth, each word one thrust, "If they come knockin'. I’ll kill’em."

It shouldn’t – really, it shouldn’t – but it has your head swimming, rocking back against him, obscene sounds filling the small bathroom and you moan loudly. His jewellery rustles and clinks as he ruts into you, huffing against your shoulder. The force of his thrusts has your body moving back and forth like a ragdoll, hipbones bouncing against the sink, one of your hands coming loose and pressing flat against the mirror, desperate for any sort of leverage.

You can feel yourself clenching around him, white hot pleasure building on the edges of your brain, until there's nothing left but him him him.

"Fuck", you cry out, "I'm gonna fucking cum, shit shit shit", lips falling agape with pure pleasure. It’s too much and you can feel your muscles tensing.  

The hand around your throat tightens a bit more and that’s all you need – has your eyes falling shut, your second orgasm rolling over you. It knocks the air straight out of your lungs, has you going limp, while the muscles in your thighs and abdomen clench, holding and squeezing his dick inside of you.

You can hear him moan deeply, sounding far far away and then his cum hits your walls, paints it as he buries himself deep deep inside of you. You gasp, desperate for air and he lets go off your throat.

You suck in a few breaths and feel him doing the same, chest heaving against your back. "Fuck", he says and slowly straightens back up, looking at you in the mirror.

"Y'good over there, love?"

"Uh-huh", you hum, unable to speak, and blink at him. His hair's a mess and his cheeks are a little reddened, glistening with sweat.

Tangerine fucking winks at you and then slooowly, very carefully pulls out of you. You inhale sharply as you feel some of his cum following suite, dripping down your legs. You want to straighten up, too, clean it up, but he's quicker, taking one of the disposable towels and gently sweeps along your cunt.

"'S good, I can do that too, y'know", you say and take it from him, cleaning yourself up. For a long moment, while you can hear him putting himself back in his pants, there's silence between the two of you. Only, as you carefully put your dress back in place, does he look at you again.

"Be careful tonight, sweetheart", he says nonchalantly while tugging his shirt back into his slacks. He says it like it's nothing but it has the hairs on your body standing up.

I’ll kill’em. I’ll kill’em. I’ll kill’em. You look on the slight stains that his blood left on your fingers, that soaked his shirt.

"Make you sure you get out of that train in Nagoya, y'hear me?", his gaze is soft as it lands upon you. Your brain goes numb with anxiety.

"Y-yeah, yeah sure. I'm meeting a friend there, wouldn't miss her for the world."

He smiles at that. A genuine, warm smile. It does something funny to your stomach. "Alright love, gotta dash", he's straightening his vest and giving himself a glance in the mirror, running his hands through his hair, "There's this chap I gotta get rid of. Gimme a call, when you're in London, would'ya?"

You just nod and take the slim, white card he hands you. The numbers on it are orange.

"Very fucking funny", you huff and he grins, leans down towards you, and places his lips on your cheek. The kiss is feather-light but it'll haunt you late at night in the weeks, months to come after the story of the crashed bullet train breaks the international news. But right now, it makes your chest tingle in all the right ways.

"Tis'a good girl, eh?", Tangerine whispers and then, throwing one last look at you, struts out of the door.

[bambikisss]

OHMAMI : K.HongJoong

🛵 : (mentioned)motorcyclist!HongJoong, badboy!HongJoong

📙 : After getting into a harsh argument with your boyfriend, things seem to get worse when the car breaks down, leaving you both stranded in the rain. So, not being to take it anymore, you call HongJoong to pick you and just drop you off at home. However, it seems he has other plans with you, tonight.

⚠ : mentions of vaping, slight cheating (if you don't take talking about breaking up as breaking up), unprotected sex

🎶 : OHMAMI - Chase Atlantic, Rude Boy - Rihanna, Deja Vu - Beyonce, Inception - ATEEZ

💕: Unprotected sex, vaping during sex (HJ does it once), complete bad boy HJ, passionate to rough, oral (m+f receiving), use of handcuffs, multiple orgsam (reader), taking a video/picture, biting, fingering

->Bambi's notes : I actually love this one so much, plus I love oreo HJ a lot lol. This may be one of my favorites.

(B/N = Boyfriend's name, HJ is just a shorter version of HongJoong.)

COMMENTS + REBLOGS ARE ENCOURAGED AND APPRECIATED | ONLY FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY

You always thought relationships should be easy. No, they should be. So why were you yelling at your boyfriend of 2 years in his old ass car on the side of the highway during a goddam rainstorm, when you should be home in bed?

"No, don't put this on me, B/N! All I asked you to do was block her number and you can't even do that! I asked you to do this almost two months ago and you're still texting her?!"

Oh, that's why- your boyfriend refused to cut off his previous fling. When you both started dating, you met her under the lie that she was his sister. You found that weird because, for the year you had known him before you both had begun dating, he had never mentioned any other siblings, nor did his parents. So imagine your surprise when you hear his phone buzzing in the middle of the night to see a text from her saying "I know we agreed to stop sleeping with each other, but I need you, tonight. The toys don't feel as good as you."

Now, when you first read it, you were in shock as Sweet Home Alabama blasted in your head. But, then you became rightfully upset. You thought about it all night until the next day, bringing it up with him during breakfast. And when you saw the color absolutely drain from his face, you knew he had some explaining to do. That's when he told you the truth: she was his friend and ex-fling. He had agreed to break it off when you and him began dating, but she seemed to think otherwise. You could remember how hard you gripped the spatula at his words, not being able to understand why he had not only lied to you, making you believe that she was your sister, but that she still thought it was alright to text you something like that.

After a few weeks of him apologizing, you told him that the only way you would get closure was for him to block her number. You thought that since she didn't respect his wishes to end it, then she wasn't a friend he should keep around. He agreed to do that for you.

No, he promised. 

So when you saw her at the party you and your boyfriend were attending together, and noticed the way she seemed to look at him, you knew something was up. Your feeling then got worse when you noticed how often your boyfriend was on his phone and how much effort he put into keeping it from your view. Your feeling was then confirmed when you got in the car later and the bright message came onto the car's screen: I promise. Y/N won't know about us.

That now led to the argument you and your boyfriend were having on the side of a highway during heavy rain in his car. As your voices continued to rise, you knew that this conversation wouldn't be going anywhere. You needed to go home and just be away from him, and maybe drink some of your favorite wine. "You know what, B/N? Whatever. No, seriously whatever. Take me home." Your voice was almost deadpan and broken due to all the yelling that had just been happening. Your boyfriend sighed, flicking his wrist to turn the car in the ignition as he tried to turn the car on, mumbling his own "whatever." However, the car didn't turn on. He continued to try and turn it on, sighing when he noticed the E flashing on his dashboard.

You felt a spark of annoyance fill you once more as you realized that he didn't fucking put gas in the car like you had suggested he do for days. Sometimes, it felt like taking care of a child and talking to a wall. "Fuck. What are you going to do?" You didn't hide your annoyance in your voice as B/N rolled his eyes, pulling out his phone. Your eyes then instantly zoomed in on the name on the top of his messages. You then cursed when you noticed he was texting her to drop off some gas for the car, and then sending her his location. You felt your body heat up as you met his eyes. Out of all the people he knew, he chose her, the subject of the argument to come drop off gas?

"Really, her? You couldn't pick someone else?" You asked, crossing your arms as your boyfriend pinched his nose, mumbling a small "shut up, Y/N."

That was your last straw.

You took out your own phone, opening your own messages to click on your close friend, HongJoong. You'd be dammed if you saw his "sister", ex-fling, or whatever she actually was to him, and let her help you get home tonight. You'd find another way.

Your eyes zoomed in on the keyboard as you quickly typed out a quick SOS message and your location to HongJoong. Within a few moments, you were not only gifted with a read receipt but with a message saying "On my way." Good ole HongJoong- would drop anything to come help you.

"Who are you texting?" Your eyes narrow at your boyfriend, his question making you hot once more. You don't respond, choosing to scroll through social media till HongJoong got here. You hoped he would get here before the other woman got here.

Well, you seemed to be lucky tonight, because soon parked his black hellcat in front of your boyfriend's car, then texted you "here. come on, princess."

While you were gathering your things, your boyfriend narrowed his eyes at the car, looking at it through the rain before he realized who that car belonged to. You knew how your boyfriend felt about HongJoong, which also drove you to choose him to come pick you up. Your boyfriend and HJ didn't mix well- your boyfriend hated how HJ always seemed to have his arm wrapped around you, a smirk on his lips when he talked to you, or how he constantly used nicknames with you. HJ, on the other hand, thought your boyfriend was shady and annoying. You smirked as you grabbed your bag, only for your wrist to be grabbed by your boyfriend, his voice now tense as he spoke. "Really, him? You really couldn't wait for-"

"You told me to shut up. Take me leaving as me shutting up" you hissed, ripping your wrist from his grip as you made sure you had everything. Before you could open the car door, though, your boyfriend spoke one more time. "If you get in his car, we're breaking up."

Now, what kind of threat was that? You rolled your eyes before you opened the car door, allowing the rain to hit your body as you met your boyfriend's eyes for the last time that night. "Fine. We're done. Fuck you and have fun fucking your sister." And with that, you slammed the car door closed, making your way to HJ's warm car. When you sat down in the passenger seat, you were met with HJ wearing his signature black hoodie and ripped jeans. He had his half-blonde, half-black hair styled, rings over his fingers, and a fruit punch-flavored vape snug in one hand. When you met his eyes, you noticed his new eyebrow piercing that seemed to glint in the streetlights.

"So, do you want to tell me now or later why I'm picking you up on the side of the highway from your boyfriend's car?" He asked, smiling at you softly as picked up his vape, taking a deep breath of the flavored nicotine before rolling down his window, breathing out the smoke before returning his attention to you. You don't know how many times you had told him to stop vaping, but he always seemed to ignore your words, but respectfully- not vaping around you in closed areas, not pushing out the smoke in your direction, not taking you to the vape shop with him, etc. You always appreciated it, for some weird reason.

"No. Just take me home. It's a long story that I do not want to relive right now." HJ noticed the annoyance in your voice, chuckling before turning his car on, the expensive car revving to life before he simply said "whatever you say, princess"

~>~

"So, like I had told you a while ago, he was still talking to his "sister?" You rolled your eyes at the playful tone in HongJoong's voice as he drove, shaking his head as he approached a red light. When you had told him about the whole situation, you hoped he would comfort you first, then make fun of it. But, deep down, you knew better. "I thought I had made it pretty obvious that I didn't want him talking to her. Then he had the nerve to say that if I got in your car, then he would break up with me."

"Woah, Y/N. So it's over?" HongJoong turned to look at you, raising an eyebrow hopefully. You shook your head as you rested it against the window, watching as the remaining rain drops from the rain storm moved down his windshield. You knew it wasn't really over. He said that in the heat of the moment and you knew that this needed an actual conversation because you knew B/N. He always said something in an argument to leave you a sting of pain.

Your attention soon returned to the street signs as the car moved, your eyebrows furrowing as you realized that this isn't the way to your house, but to HongJoong's. When you mentioned it to him, he only chuckled before he said "Y/N, princess, come on. You really think I would let you go home where I know that you're going to down a bottle of wine by yourself and cry? Why would I, being the great friend that I am, let you do that? So, you're staying with me at my house. No exceptions." You tried to argue weakly with him, but it was obvious that he wasn't going to change his mind. You relaxed back in the seat, watching the familiar street signs move as he drove.

The car soon stopped in front of his garage, the lights on inside to show you that he instantly left when you sent him that text. That thought made you smile. "Hold on, princess." Before you could leave the car, you felt his hand wrap around your wrist, the same way your boyfriend's had, but only more gentle. You turned to meet his eyes as his fingers gently moved over the skin on your wrist, his eyes glimmering with something bad...almost naughty as he looked at you. "Even though I know you know this about me, just remember that I'm the type of man to take what someone says at face value...and since your little boyfriend, no ex, said that if you got in my car, it's over, and you got in my car..."

HongJoong let his words trail off as he lifted your wrist to his lips, pressing a small kiss to it before gently biting it with teeth, making you gasp softly. He smiled more against your wrist before he dropped your hand from his grasp, shooting you a wink before grabbing his vape and car keys, making his way inside. HongJoong had a thing for you for the longest time, it only growing when he saw you with B/N. He felt protective and almost territorial over you, not hesitating to wrap his arm over your shoulder or call you a variety of nicknames even though he knew you were taken. He knew that he could be a better man for you, no, that he was the better man for you. He just needed to see if you felt the same way.

You sat in shock in his car, noticing how slow he was putting his key into the door, as if he was waiting for you. You scrambled to grab your bag and phone before jogging up to join him at the front door, making him chuckle. "There you are, princess. I thought you were going to try and spend the whole night sleeping in my hellcat."

Your mind was still scrambled due to HongJoong's actions, not responding to his comment as you follow him into the house. You smiled at the familiar scent, along with the various motorcycle items on the kitchen counter, all polished. You smiled as you dragged one of your fingers along the helmet, smiling more at the reflection of you and HJ. "You know, you still haven't taken me on a ride on your prized motorcycle. You promised me for my birthday last year that you would" You laugh softly as he rolls his eyes, approaching you with his own smile as he moves to press his chest against yours, making you back up against the counter and helmet. "I rushed to go pick you up from your goddam boyfriend and this is how you treat me, Y/N? I'm offended" You bite your lip softly as one of his hands moved to your lower back, right above your ass as he whispers "plus, you can ride something else, tonight."

You didn't know where HongJoong suddenly obtained the confidence to say such things and touch you like this, but it made you almost dizzy. You had never felt that way for your boyfriend when he did this stuff to you, but HongJoong seemed to have your mind already fuzzy, all from a flirty joke and his touch alone. "Tell me, Y/N, have you ever thought about me when you're with B/N? Do you ever wish you were in my car or in my house when you were with him?" HongJoong raised an eyebrow as he spoke, his hand moving slowly up the small of your back as his fingers poke the under the your shirt, making you sigh. "Do you ever wish it was me touching you like that? Don't you wish you were in my bed, my lips all over you, making you feel so much better than your fucking ex?" You didn't have a response, but he knew. He had seen how your eyes linger on his lips when they're wrapped around his vape, how you get when he wraps his arm over your shoulder, how you seem to call him first when something happens so he can comfort you. You have female friends who could comfort you, but you always seem to want him first.

Your mind was dizzy, trying to remind you about B/N, but you couldn't. HJ had you in a trance...and he wasn't wrong.

You met him in a hungry kiss, running your hands through his hair as his hands move under your shirt, working on removing your bra. You gasped softly into the kiss as he skillfully removed your bra, pulling it from under your top before he picked you up, wrapping your legs around his waist. The kiss seemed to become hotter as he began to walk you both to his bedroom, his groans coming through the kiss as you ground against him. Your eagerness only made him more horny, kicking open his bedroom door before he pressed you against the first wall he saw, your back now against one of his posters as he continued to kiss you, his tongue pushing into your mouth as his fingers push up your top.

"Fuck, Joong," You gasped as your breasts became exposed to the cold bedroom air, the nipples hardening as HongJoong tossed away the fabric. He smirked softly, glad that you're already saying his name. But, he has things to attend to.

Your eyes close as his lips wrap around one of your nipples, the other one getting pinched and rolled by one of his hands. Your legs seem to tighten around his waist, arching your back as his teeth seem to graze over your nipple before he switches, giving the other one the same treatment as he says "wouldn't want this other one to be jealous." You didn't care, running your hands through his hair as he slowly kissed down your breasts, licking along your stomach as he got onto his knees. You never thought you'd see him on his knees, but it did something for you. He roughly pulled down your pants, tossing them away haphazardly before he gripped your legs, placing them onto his shoulders as he looked up at you with hooded eyes.

"You know, I've always wondered if you have pretty panties. Based on all the bathing suits you've worn, it always made me hard to think that you had pretty little panties that could get ruined by your naughty pussy" You didn't have a chance to respond to his words as he pushed your underwear to the side, licking a long strip up your pussy slowly before going back to dive his tongue into you. Your back once again arched against the wall as he played with your folds, taking his time tasting and licking every crevice of you. You hummed against his face, rolling your hips against his face as he sped up.

"Good girl, baby." HongJoong gently pulls back from your pussy, spitting back into it before he sped up his movements, his mind filled with only thoughts of pleasing you, getting you off on his tongue right against his wall. You can't help but moan louder as he speeds up, one of his hands moving up your body to grip your neck as he moans loudly into your pussy, the vibrations pushing you closer to your orgsam. HongJoong smiles as he notices how much louder you've gotten, his tongue now curling and speeding up as he fucks you with his tongue. His eyes never left yours as he squeezed around your neck, his own moan getting louder as your eyes begin to roll back. "Come on baby. Cum for me." He lowly praised you as you came, his tongue only slowing down when you began to whine.

As you slowly come down from your high, you feel HongJoong move you from the wall to the bed, roughly dropping you onto the bed before he begins to strip himself. You turned your head to see him standing in front of you, completely naked with his hand wrapped around his thick cock, moving along his length slowly as he watched you. You could feel your mouth and body regain all of your energy as you watched him, a small moan leaving your lips as his thumb moved along his tip, gathering his precum before chuckling. You sat up on your knees as he moved to sit on the bed in front of you, his free hand gripping your jaw to make sure you met his eyes.

HongJoong had many fantasizes about you, but seeing you right now on your knees in front of him in his bedroom did something to him. He felt like he could cum right at the sight, but he wanted to wait.

His eyes continued to meet yours as his precum covered thumb moved to your lips, watching as you slowly opened your mouth to wrap around it, your tongue moving to meet it as you licked and sucked it clean. He couldn't help but smirk, his eyes darkening once more as his cock twitched.

"I knew it, Y/N. You're absolutely filthy." He chuckled, humming as he moved his thumb around your mouth before pulling it from your lips, smirking at the string of saliva you left connecting to his thumb. You nodded at his words, willing to agree to whatever he said in that moment. HongJoong chuckled at your nod, laying down on the bed with his head against your knees. You looked at him with confusion across your face as he grabbed his vape, your hands running through his hair as he slowly blows out the flavored air. At the feeling of your hands in his hair along with the rush from the vape, he couldn't help but close his eyes. It felt nice, despite the fact that you both were naked and horny still, this moment was something he had always wanted with you. But, his twitching dick needed to be attended to.

"Sit on my face."

The moment was quickly shattered at his words, your eyes widening as your hands stilled in his hair. He slowly opened his eyes to see your reaction, your wide eyes making him laugh. "Come on, Y/N, don't be so shocked. Who wouldn't want you to sit on their face?" You could feel your cheeks heat up, smacking his shoulder as he laughed more. His blunt words had you stunned, but the idea did make you wet once more.

"I've never done it before, though" You had wanted to with B/N, but the opportunity never came up as well sex with him was...bland. HongJoong hummed as he kissed your knee and thighs, shrugging before he looked up at you once more. "And? Who better to do it with than with me?" You gasped as he gripped your knees, spreading them open before his hands moved up your sides, pulling you closer to his body to almost crawl over him. You let him move you, placing your hands on the bed as they sat on either side of his legs. You couldn't help but notice his thick cock once more leaking precum as his hands move up your thighs and ass, gripping your flesh as he hummed. He spread you open before his hands gripped your hips, pulling you back so you could sit on his open mouth. At first, you tried to not fully sit down as you were scared of crushing him, but that only made him groan loudly in annoyance, his teeth meeting the inside of your thigh before roughly pulled you down onto his mouth.

Your head immediately fell back as his tongue eagerly moved around your pussy, his moans now louder. In this position, his tongue could go deeper into you, but he could also feel and grip your ass.

"Fuck, you taste so good. I knew someone as hot as you would have such a naughty pussy, Y/N." HongJoong gripped your hips more as his lips wrapped around your clit, chuckling when he felt your thighs shake. You felt like you couldn't sit up straight anymore, leaning forward so your hands were once again against the bed, your hips still making sure to press down again his mouth. Your moans got louder the deeper his tongue moved in you, his rings adding to the experience as he gripped your ass, spreading you open just the way he wanted. Your head soon turned to see his cock still leaking, you mouth watering once more as you thought of his taste you had on his thumb.

HJ felt you move, raising an eyebrow. "Y/N, why are you- oh my fucking god, baby"

His head fell back as you took him into your mouth, his mouth open as you licked along his length. He was going to ask you later on if you wanted to suck him off, but having you now in this position was just as good, if not better. He chuckled breathlessly as you shook your ass, reminding him of what he should be doing. He licked his lips before his focus returned, one of his hands coming down to smack your ass, moaning deeply with you as you moan around his cock, one of his fingers moving along your pussy before pushing into you. He tossed his head back again as you moaned louder around him, not hesitating to begin to fuck you with his finger while his other hand slowly moved up your back to your head, pushing you down around his cock before he began to fuck up into your throat, chuckling whenever you choked or gurgled around his cock.

"Don't act like you can't take this cock, Y/N. We both know you're a naughty girl," he tsked, his hand moving from your hair back to your ass as he gripped it, moving it so he could watch his finger enter and disappear in you only to reappear covered in your wet juices. You moaned loudly at his words, pressing your nose down against him as you held him in your throat for a few seconds, making him moan before smacking your ass again, a small "good girl" leaving his lips in praise before he added another finger into you, curling it.

You felt your second orgsam approach as he moved his fingers faster, his hand moving to grip your hair as he tugged you off his cock, wanting to hear you moan his name louder as his fingers plunged into you at a rough pace. With him repeatedly hitting your spot and with how hard he was gripping your hair, you knew your orgsam was going to hit fast and hard, just like how you both wanted.

"Joong, I'm so close, don't stop" you moaned, your own body moving back and forth to meet his fingers' movements, making him not only moan, but move even faster. He placed a small kiss and bite to your thigh as it began to shake, curling his fingers once more as you began to shake around them. He praised you as you came, his hand moving from your hair to smack your ass gently, moving his body so you could lay down against the bed. He licked his fingers as he watched you shake gently against the bed, feeling like you could fall asleep right there. But, the feeling of sleep went away when you felt his hands move up your body to your shoulders, the tip of his cock now pressing against your entrance.

"Don't fall asleep on my now, Y/N. I still haven't came yet, nor have you got to wet my cock." You gripped the sheets as you tried to sit up to try and explain that you couldn't move your legs, but he seemed to beat you to it. You rested your head against the bed as he stood up from the bed, walking out of the room. You rested against the bed as you tried to wonder what he was doing especially after what he had said. You had never came twice from someone, especially that hard and without them even using their cock. A part of you couldn't help but be excited at the idea of him fucking you though, especially with how thick it felt in your throat.

HJ soon returned to your sight, his naked body leaning against the doorway as he looked at you. You couldn't see his hands, but you noticed how his eyes slowly moved over your body, admiring it once more as his cock twitched again. He wanted to see it once more before he ruined you, knowing that when he was done having you cum all over his cock, you both were going to be too exhausted to do anything else.

"Tell me, baby, did B/N ever... experiment with you?" You raised an eyebrow at his words, shaking your head at his words. "No, it was always pretty vanilla, why?"

"Well, that's such a shame, isn't it? He should always be looking for new ways to pleasure you, make you scream his name, to make you cum the hardest, right?" You nodded at his words, making him smile. His smile looked mischievous and evil, his tongue coming out to lick along his bottom lip before he fully pushed open the bedroom door, showing a small grey digital camera in one hand and a pair of handcuffs in the other. He slowly approached the bed, his fingers playing with the handcuffs as his eyes locked in one yours. His eyes were dark- like you were being hunted.

"I wouldn't want you to forget about our night together, Y/N. I want you to hold any other man who you sleep with to my standards, princess." He tossed the items onto the bed before he gripped your jaw, pulling you close to him, his lips hovering right over yours. You couldn't help but lean in close to try and kiss him, but he quickly pulled back, chuckling at your pout before he shook his head. "No, no, baby. Let me set you up first, then we can maybe kiss"

"Well then, hurry up" HJ chuckled at your eagerness, despite just not being able to move a few minutes ago. But, nonetheless, he was here to please you.

He moved you so your hands were against the headboard, spreading your legs before he handcuffed your wrists together, then handcuffed them to the headboard. You looked down at your knees that sat pressed into his pillows before he pulled them back a bit, pressing his hand down against your lower back so you'd arch it. When he was satisfied with your position, he then reached down to grab the camera before leaning in to press his chest against your back, the tip of his cock against your pussy once more. He faced the camera towards you both, his lips moving to your ear as he whispered "a little before picture." He pressed a quick kiss to your ear before he clicked a button, the camera taking a picture of the two of you before he tossed it haphazardly onto the bed, his hands moving to grip your hips before he slowly pushed into you.

Your moans mixed in together as his cock stretched you out, your nails digging into the headboard as he his fingers dug into your hips. He slowly kissed up the back of your neck before biting down on your shoulder as his cock fully stretched you. He hummed at the feeling of your warm and wet walls around his cock, feeling you pulse around him before he slowly pulled back out, leaving just his tip in you before he grunted into your ear lowly "be loud, baby. Don't hold back."

Your nails dug more into the headboard as he roughly pushed back into your, his hips now snapping against your ass as you moaned loudly. Your jaw became slack as he fucked you, his loud moans mixing with yours as he smacked your ass. Your eyes had closed at the feeling, his hips beginning to slow down for a moment as he rolled his hips to meet your ass, moving deeper in you. Then, you heard it.

Click.

Click.

You bit your lip at the sound of the camera going off, turning your head back to see HJ holding the camera, taking a picture of your ass against his hips, your arched back, and now-

"Keep looking back here at me, baby" he too a picture of your face as he picked back up the pace, snapping a few of your reactions to his cock diving in you before he dropped the camera once more in favor of gripping your hips. You felt your body heat up once more, panting that you were about to cum again. HongJoong only chuckled deeply before he whispered in your ear "I don't fucking care, cum again for me baby. Come on, cream on my cock, I'm still going to fuck you till I fill you up with my cum"

You moaned loudly at his words, clamping down around him before you came, your body shivering at the feeling as he moaned. The cum ring began to form around his cock, making him have to rip his eyes from his cock before he gripped your breasts, pulling your body. You bit your lip as your back was now fully arched, your wrists still against the headboard while your legs were now against the bed, HJ now straddling them before as he panted, his hair now pressed against his sweat covered forehead.

"Now, I can fuck you deeper baby and push my cum nice and deep, just like you deserve" he smirked before he began to move his hips again, biting his lips as he listened to you moaning his name louder as his cock drilled into you, the new position allowing him to go as deep as he wanted. He leaned down to bite your shoulder, licking the area before his hand moved around your stomach, chuckling as he felt his cock through you. "You're so fucking filthy, Y/N. Be honest, you wanted this- you wanted me to come pick you up, take you my house, handcuff you to my bed, and fuck this naughty pussy just like this, didn't you?"

"Yes! Yes, I wanted you to" you moaned loudly, your mind now a mess as he moves even faster, chuckling against your neck before he grunts, roughly pushing all the way in you before he stops, making you whine. He gently shushes you before he leaned back to grab his phone, unlocking it before he pulls up his camera, setting it on the nightstand so it could see you and him both on the recording before he pressed start.

HongJoong was now panting, kissing your shoulder before he whispered in your ear "I'm about to fucking cum" you nodded, spreading your legs a bit more as he began to grind against your ass, his hands moving up your body to grip your breasts before he bit the shell of your ear, grunting deep in your ear "I'm going to fill you up, baby, but I want to hear you ask for it. Be loud enough so the camera can hear you baby. Be loud"

"Please give me your cum, HongJoong, give me all of it. Fill me up so much that it leaks out of my pussy, so then you have to fuck it back into me"

Your words cause HongJoong's brain to short circuit, his cock driving into you a rough yet pleasurable pace as he wrapped his arms around your body, holding you close to him he placed wet kisses against your shoulder, growling lowly that he was super close. That was your only warning before his hips pressed roughly and firmly against your ass, his dick twitching in your before his cum painted your walls, his moan echoing around the room as he panted against your shoulder. His eyes were shut for a bit before one of his hands moved over your handcuffed wrists, his hips once more moving in you, ignoring how the overstimulation felt for him, his other hand moving to play with your clit. You gasped, meeting his hips as you moved back, your ass slightly bouncing against them as you chased after your last orgsam. Your eyes began to flutter closed as you came, your body falling limp around his biceps.

"There we go, baby, I'll hold you together. I knew you could do make a mess all over my dick" You hummed at his words, feeling like you were beyond cloud nine. You both rested against one another for a bit before he slowly uncuffed you from the headboard, carefully laying you down on the bed. You felt like you were going to fall asleep, your eyes fighting to stay open as he slowly pulled out of you before going to grab a rag and clean you up. You breathed in his scent on his pillow, a small smile coming onto your face at the scent before jumping a bit at the feeling of the cloth.

"Don't move, princess. You body must be sore" he hummed, wiping all of his cum from your body before he rubbed your back, pressing a kiss down to the small of your back before he laid down behind you, gently spooning you. You smiled at his warm embrace, your eyes still fighting to stay open.

You were about to doze off when you felt his arms move, his hands grabbing his phone from the nightstand before he stopped the recording. He then saved it, checking the time before he turned off his phone. "What are you going to do with that recording, Joong?"

"Well, it depends on how you answer my question, baby," you looked back over your shoulder at him, his lips pressed against your shoulder as his hand rubbed your side. You couldn't help but admire him- the moonlight that came through his window made his eyebrow piercing glimmer, his eyes were now soft, and his oreo colored hair was now a mix due to your hands running through them. He didn't look like such a bad boy in this moment, just HongJoong.

He admired you too, smiling against your shoulder before he decided to bite the bullet. "So, is this a one off thing, or...are you going to break up with B/N and maybe see where things can go with us?"

You could see the nervousness develop in HJ's eyes- a look you've never seen, but one you that showed you he meant it, and that he was being vulnerable with you. You carefully turned in the bed to cup his cheeks, a small smile on your lips before you spoke. "You're the person who said you'd take what someone says at face value. He said that if I got in your car, than he was breaking up with me. Plus, I had told him to have fun fucking his "sister," too, so-"

"You said what?" HongJoong laughed, making you laugh as he held up his hand, high fiving you before he slowly intertwined your fingers, pressing a kiss to your hand and your wrist, pulling you close so your head was against his chest. You nodded, squeezing your hand with his before you continued. "So, I think things are over between me and B/N. And, I'd love to see where things go between you and me, Joong. But, you have to take me riding on your motorcycle like you promised"

HongJoong laughed at your words, pressing a small kiss to your forehead before he nodded. "Fine, tomorrow I'll take you out on the motorcycle, but that's only after a safety lesson. Then, we'll go out for dinner."

You agreed with his words, squeezing your hand with his once more before your eyes slowly closed, listening to his heartbeat as you both fell asleep in each other's embrace, listening to the rain outside.

[aki-anikk]

Tw: angst, and That's All i think? Well maybe that they are young, not full on teenagers but kids.

Was intended for male reader but can be read as gender neutral or female too! :)

Please dm me if i can fix something.

(sorry if it came out weird, first time writing a ff)

You don't know when it started, but what you do know is that.. whenever you see him - your heart speeds up, your cheeks flush and... You just can't take your eyes off him.

Which usually resulted in you getting yelled at by him. You knew his face so well, every little wrinkle when he frowned at you, that scowl when you gave him flowers, the gritting of teeth when you talked to him with those hopeful, soft eyes.

Oh how you loved that boy. For Simon Riley, you were like a love sick puppy.

Yet he didn't seem to want it, pushing you away, ignoring you and telling you many, many rude things. Just so you would leave him alone.

But how could you? How could you do that when you saw the other side of him? How he cared for the homeless dogs, how one day he beat up some people that bullied his friends.

It didn't matter that he wasn't like that for you.

Well, he was at the begining.

At first he was nice, he talked with you and even helped you when other kids picked on you, so how could you not love him? Yet sometimes you wished you didn't, it felt like you destroyed everything between you two because of feeling this weird, this warm tickle whenever you saw his smile.

The moment when you came to him for the first time to confess your love, full of hope, with even a boquet, that you spent at least 2 hours to pick flowers for, to make it big, perfect, just for him.

But his reaction wasn't what you expected. There was suprise, confusion and then... Anger. He didn't take them, and every next time he didn't even touch them. He hated how you looked at him, he hated these sweet smiles you sent him - not even aware of doing it.

He hated you.

He had other problems to deal with, his father, school, and people who always seemed to pick on him, without even any reason. He didn't need someone to follow him around like a dog, someone who no matter how much he yelled, hurted and snapped at, would always come back. Never, not even once, looking at him with anything else but affection.

One time he couldn't bear it anymore. He walked back from school after being teased by his classmates about you and he was going back to a home where his hell would continue.

He felt overwhelmed, needed to let it out. And who was there? You. Again.

Of course you were. You always were.

When he turned around and he saw you with yet another boquet... It was too much.

The flowers were beautiful, clearly carefully picked and put together with care to make it special, just for Simon.

Those eyes filled with Hope that maybe, just maybe he would change his mind, and this time and accept you. No matter how many times he pushed you away, you never lost hope.

He finally felt something snapping inside of him, not being able to bear it anymore. Those eyes, that smile, the confessions. He couldn't.

And for the first time he took the flowers you gave him. Your eyes widened slightly, you wanted to smile, Hug him, anything.

But everything was crushed the moment he rose his hand and threw it on the ground, stomping on your hard work. Your sign of love.

"If you love me, then don't ever come close to me again"

Those were the last words you heard from his lips. He walked away clearly angry, not even looking back. Leaving you frozen. You were just staring at the destroyed flowers as you held in your tears.

You felt a lot of things that moment. Despair, pain.... Oh you were so hurt. How could such a small heart like yours not break at this?

Your first love had just ended, before it even began.

But one thing didn't change, the feeling of care you held for him. It was engraved into your soul and would never leave it, no matter if it healed, it would leave scars.

So you left.

Just like he asked.

But not because you hated him, not because he hated you.

You did it because it was the first and only way he allowed you to show his love for him.

'if you love me, then don't ever come close to me again'

So you didn't come back, and this way you had shown, that you truly loved him.

Neither of you knew how to handle that pure and childish love, so it had to be finally broken.

[queen-of-the-avengers]

Redemption

Pairing: Tom!Peter Parker x Teen!Reader

Word Count: ~2.9k

Warnings: bullying (from you), feeling guilty and sad for treating him such, angst

Summary: You don't hate Peter. You hate that you're jealous of him. You hate that he always gets good grades without trying while you bust your ass and fail. When you find his diary, you learn more about Peter than you probably should know.

Squares Filled: regret for @spider-man-bingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

It’s another peaceful walk to school. Your apartment building is only a few blocks from your high school, so your mom allows you to walk it if you only stick to the well-known paths and avoid strange people on the sidewalk. She’s been paranoid ever since she saw in the news about some little girl getting kidnapped by someone on the streets. It took a lot to convince her that you would be fine, so she agreed if you stuck to her terms, which you do.

You’re blaring your favorite music through your headphones as you tune out everyone around you. You’re looking down at the sidewalk so you don’t see someone come barreling your way. The person almost knocks you to the ground, so you yank your headphones off and glare at the person who did it. 

Of course, it’s Peter fucking Parker. He catches his footing and continues to walk past you as if he has somewhere else more important to be.

“Watch where you’re going, asshat!” you yell after him.

Peter mumbles an apology without so much as a look back at you, and you roll your eyes in annoyance. Out of everyone in school, he’s the one who annoys you the most. He thinks just because he’s so fucking smart that the rest of the rules don’t apply to him. When he gets in trouble, the teachers end up giving him a slap-on-the-wrist punishment because he gets good grades and keeps to himself. 

He doesn’t pay attention half the time but he gets stellar grades. You work your ass off and the best you can get is a B, mostly C’s. He pisses you off because you’re so jealous of him. It’s not him as a person, he’s actually quite nice, it’s the fact that he doesn’t even try and still gets everything he wants. You try so hard but still fail. Your annoyance and pissy mood have evolved into snappy comments and rude stares.

You walk the rest of the way without music, and you immediately head to your first class which so happens to be science. You’re not doing well in that class but Peter is, and he makes sure to show off intentionally or not. Today in class is lab day, and you’re supposed to mix certain chemicals to create a foamy mixture that grows a lot.

Peter shifts in his seat anxiously and watches the clock count down. You grab the ingredients that are listed in the book and glance at Peter.

“Peter, I need your help. I don’t know what I’m doing.” Peter snaps out of his trance and sets up the main portion of the lab. He grabs his phone to check the time and ends up getting distracted by one of his notifications. “I think we need this one, right?” When Peter doesn’t answer, you kick his chair lightly. “Peter, is this the right one?”

“Hold on, give me a second.”

You roll your eyes and pour what you think is the right amount of the chemical you believe to be right. The mixture doesn’t match and ends up exploding, sending shards of glass across your table. The mixture spills onto the desk and you quickly move the papers to avoid them from getting ruined.

“Fuck!”

“Y/N! Language!” your teacher scolds. A few students laugh at your failure, and you feel tears prick your eyes. “Don’t move, let me get paper towels.”

“If Peter bothered to help me, then maybe I might actually get something done right. He’s staring at his phone.”

“Peter, put your phone away before I take it for the day.”

Your teacher helps you clean up the mess before getting you a new glass beaker. Peter puts his phone in his bag and slumps in his chair.

“Thanks a lot,” Peter mumbles.

“Get your head out of your ass and do your part.”

“You did it wrong.”

Of course, you did. Here’s Peter Parker to the fucking rescue. He makes this shit look so easy. He grabs the right chemicals and pours the right amount into the beaker. It grows and spills over the top like it’s supposed to. God, you feel like such a failure.

“I hate you,” you mumble under your breath but Peter hears.

His shoulders sag sadly from your comment but he chooses not to respond to it. You don’t really hate him. You hate how brilliant he is. You hate how he makes you feel. You hate that you don’t hate him at all.

The next two classes go by without a hitch for two reasons. You have English and Math which are your favorite subjects, and Peter isn’t in your classes to annoy you. However, economics is your next one which you have Peter in. If you think science is your worst subject, it’s economics. As much as you try to understand and study the packets, it’s not clicking with you. The teacher once had to create a special packet for you dumbing it down really far. It made you feel like an idiot, especially when Peter picked up on it so easily.

What is with that kid? Can’t he see how jealous you are of him? It’s like he likes torturing you on purpose. Much like in science, you and Peter are paired for a project involving creating your own city with its own rules. He’s distracted by whatever is on his phone while you’re doing all the work. Typical. 

You grab the textbook and look at the current chapter you’re on. It has everything you need to create your own city. The only thing Peter was good at was naming it, and you’re struggling with putting the rules down on paper. You write out the first rule as this is a democracy. The teacher split the class in half so that one half is Democrats and the other is Republicans.

“Peter, what is so important that you can’t help me?” you sigh and look at him. “You know I suck at this class.”

“I’m sorry, I have to go,” he mumbles and gathers his things.

“What?” Peter quickly excuses himself to the bathroom and runs out of class, leaving you to fend for yourself. “Asswipe!”

“Y/N! Language!” the teacher glares at you.

You roll your eyes and try your best not to sit there and cry from stress and jealousy. When class is over, you find Peter by his locket putting things into it. You slam your hand into the locker beside yours causing him to flinch.

“Thanks a lot for ditching me,” you glare. “Next time you do, I’m going straight to the teacher. You’re not Captain America. You don’t get a free pass here.”

“I’m sorry,” Peter stutters. “It’s just that--”

“I don’t want to hear your sorry excuses. Now you get to finish the project by yourself.”

You shove the folder into his hands and stalk off without another word. His shoulder sags as soon as you’re out of view, and he bangs his head against his locker in defeat. Ned walks up to him already knowing why his friend is like this.

“Is it Y/N again?”

“I don’t get why she hates me so much,” Peter sighs and shoves the project into his locker.

The bell rings to signal lunch and you close your locker to meet up with your friend. You turn the corner to another hallway and spot something black on the ground. Everyone is walking by it as if it means nothing to them. Upon further examination, you see that it’s a notebook. You turn to the first page and see the words, “My Journal” written on it. It’s a diary. Someone dropped their diary, but there is no name to indicate who this belongs to.

Now if this was your diary and someone randomly picked it up, would you want them to read it? It’s kind of hard to answer since you don’t have a diary. With a shrug, you turn to the first entry to see if there is something to tell you who the writer is.

There’s a girl in my class who I can’t stop thinking about. I haven’t known her long but she is the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. Hair that seems as long as Rapunzel’s, eyes that get me lost whenever I look into them, smooth skin, and freckles that dance across her cheeks. I’m too nervous to go up to her and have a conversation with her. What would I say? What could I say that won’t make me look like an idiot? Every morning I see her, it’s like all reason goes flying out of my head. She talks to me but I can’t help but stutter in response. She makes me so nervous. Is that a good thing? I don’t know anymore.

There is another entry next to that one, and you can’t help but read it as you walk to the lunch room.

I think she hates me. She’s always calling me an asswipe or asshat for everything I mess up on. She’s in four of my classes and we’re paired in projects for three of them. I try to get the teacher to pair me with someone else to spare her feelings but that never happens. I don’t know why she hates me. I haven’t done anything to her. Nothing I do seems to be right in her eyes. Maybe I should give up this tiny crush I have on her. Ned tells me I’m wasting my time. I don’t know how to fix what I have with her.

Asswipe? Asshat? Ned? Does this diary belong to Peter? He has a crush on you? Your heart hurts at “I don’t know why she hates me. I haven’t done anything to her”. Your jealousy of Peter is rubbing off the wrong way. Suddenly, you regret everything you have ever said to him. You didn’t mean to hurt him. Your jealousy has put a film over your eyes and prevented you from seeing how much you’re hurting him.

We had a project today in science class. He must have written this today. I wanted to help her. I know she’s struggling in most classes. Usually, I would have. I hate seeing her stress about something that comes so easily to me. I’d tutor her if I didn’t think she’d bite my head off or make some jab about it. Today, I noticed something on my phone that almost got me in trouble. Ned told me that someone was selling drugs next to the school. I had to leave to stop them or else who knows who might have gotten involved. I hated leaving her in class like that but I had to.

You should stop reading. You should just shut this and return it to Peter who is probably frantically looking for it. You walk into the lunch room and see him and Ned huddled together at a lunch table with MJ seated across from them. He doesn’t look in a panic. He might not know it’s gone. You should walk up to him and hand it back but you can’t stop reading. This is how you’re going to know how he feels. Instead of doing the right thing, you turn and find a secluded spot in the back and continue reading.

I can’t believe I got to leave the country! I have never thought to get a passport much less my driver’s license. Not only did I get to go to Germany, I went with Iron Man! He was like ‘Peter, I need you to come with me and help fight Captain America with me’. I was like ‘I don’t know if I should’ but he wasn’t taking no for an answer. I didn’t think I would be fighting more than Captain America, but there I was ready to give it my all! I even went up the big, bad, scary Winter Solider. He went to punch me, and I caught his metal arm. Metal arm! How cool is that?! I have never been part of something so special before.

Your mouth drops open when you read about his adventure with Captain America and Iron Man. This journal is out of order since the airport battle happened a month or so ago. Still, he was there. Is he superhuman? Someone with powers?

I kind of wish people knew I was Spider-Man. The only person who knows is Ned because he caught me crawling on the ceiling in my bedroom. I wish I could tell Y/N but she’d probably hate me more than she already does. I’m scared she’d spread that secret around school just to spite me. I truly don’t know why she hates me. I try every day to get on her good side. I like her so much. She’s so beautiful and smart and energetic. I see her around her friends all the time. I wish she was like that with me. I hate that I’m screwing this up, whatever it is we have. I don’t know how to fix it.

Guilt weighs heavily on your shoulders at the way you’ve been treating Peter. Just because you’re not as smart as him doesn’t mean you should take your frustrations out on him. It doesn’t even faze you that he’s Spider-Man. Peter noticed you in the back reading something. He knows you were there reading so it’s not like you can walk up to him now and return the diary. What would you even say?

You close the diary and shove it into your backpack before heading to your next class. Your stomach grumbles from having missed lunch but you’ll live. This is the last period of the day, so you’ll eat when you get home. Peter is in this class and just so happens to sit next to you. The teacher passes out project details you need to be paired for, and she pairs you with Peter. He’s bouncing his leg anxiously and staring at the clock.

You look at him just as the teacher sets the paper on the desk. He wants to leave. He has better things to do than sit here with you and complete some project. He fought with Captain America and has super spider powers. Why is he still in school? Peter does a double-take at you when he catches you staring at him.

“What? Do I have something on my face?”

“No. You look nervous. Do you need to be somewhere?”

“Yeah, actually.”

“You should go,” you whisper. Peter looks at you with a surprised look. You hate when he leaves you to do all the work. Why are you telling him to abandon you now? “I can do this by myself. Say you need to go to the bathroom or something. It’s last period anyway, so it won’t matter much.”

“Are you sure? You’re not gonna yell at me?”

His comment breaks your heart. You hate yourself for how you’ve been treating him.

“No,” you shake your head.

“Thanks.”

Peter gives you an award-winning smile and excuses himself to the bathroom. The teacher doesn’t even notice that he has grabbed all of his things. This class always goes by quickly, so you’re home before you even know it. The rest of Peter’s journal is filled with entries about how good you looked, how he saved you from a man who was following you one day, and how he doesn’t know how to confess his feelings for you.

This journal belongs back to the original owner. You scribble a note for him to find in an envelope with his name on it just in case his aunt sees this before him. Peter’s apartment is only a few blocks from yours, so you head over there knowing he probably won’t be home. He’s off being a hero somewhere, so you feel safe to drop this off without being caught. You drop the book at the front door and knock three times before leaving.

Peter answers the door having only been home for an hour to do homework before he’s off doing his hero duties. He looks down the hallway but doesn’t see anyone. He looks down and notices his journal with an envelope on top of it. He grabs it and goes to his room to read the note privately.

Peter,  I am sorry for how I’ve been treating you. I want you to know that it’s not you. You’re very nice. It’s the fact that I’m jealous of how smart you are. You pass every class and get good grades while I try my best and get B’s and C’s. I know that’s not an excuse for how I’ve treated you. I wish I could take everything I said back. I hope we can be friends… maybe more than that someday. I understand if you don’t ever want to talk to me again. Anyway, I just want you to know how great and amazing you are. Keep being you. P.S Your secret is safe with me. If I ever see Spider-Man swinging about, I’ll be thinking of you. Y/N

Peter doesn't care that you read his journal. He would have if he found one lying about. He smiles at the knowledge of you knowing his biggest secret and the fact that you might have a small crush on him. He can’t wait to see you tomorrow at school.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[hatsunevitu]

i, personally, am not really into stan getting into kyman’s way and trying to stop them from dating, but it seems to be one of the most popular trope for stan in kyman fics. and although i can see the appeal, i prefer another option.

please think about stan who’s actually helping kyman to get together.

so cartman has a big and (as he thinks) unrequited crush on kyle, and he decides that the fastest and most effective way to win kyle’s heart is to get stan’s support since stan and kyle are the best friends. and if you have stan by your side, you can say that half of work here is done.

and as a professional manipulator cartman convinces stan into helping him – he plays the “i’m on my meds & went through therapy” card, he says that stan is the one who gotta understand how broken heart and unmutual feeling hurt, that it’s almost their prom and cartman doesn’t have enough time to hit on kyle properly – and who knows, maybe they won’t even be in touch after kyle enters the university, so cartman has only one chance. he swears on his life he’s never gonna hurt kyle, and he flatters stan by saying he always hated him the least out of all the boys.

and stan as a hopeless romantic and sucker for stories with unmutual crushes finally gives in agreeing to help cartman. bonus if wendy is totally into this idea because a) it’d be amusing to watch them having their drama; b) she supports gay rights and wrongs; c) she think that kyle would be like a good influence for cartman and could “fix him” (my girl has never been so wrong in her entire life)

so they all start a whole new project for making kyle consider cartman as a proper romantic partner.

cartman: Okay. You have to invite him to the cinema BUT you will dump him at the very last minute so he’ll have to go there with me. What movie should we choose?

stan: Uhhh… There’s a new DC movie?

cartman: DUDE! Even I know he’s more of a Marvel fan.

stan: Well, I’m- I’m not supposed to memorize his preferences by heart, you know!

cartman: You’re his best friend?????

btw stanman and candy bonding over there :333

so wendy and stan help him to plan the whole dates, but the minor problem is that they have veeery different understanding of the romance.

wendy: The best way to win his heart and make some obvious hints is to take him out for a romantic dinner in the restaurant!

stan: No way, Kyle’ll hate that! Take him for a basketball game, he loves basketball.

cartman: …Can’t I just invite him to watch “The passion”?

wendy&stan, indignantly: CARTMAN!

cartman: What? It’s symbolic!

so they end up convincing him that kyle is never gonna like cartman if he doesn’t hide his true self, so he has to pretend a lot. he hates this idea, but eventually agrees and starts faking his behaviour being all nice, polite and kind-hearted, but every time their dates become a mess. and kyle seems to react veeery negatively, because even though he thought he wanted cartman to change, and he’s supposed to be happy that cartman is finally acting like a decent normal person – deep down he can’t get rid of this vague feeling that something is wrong, that he’s faking. and it irritates him so much he gets more and more angry and yells at cartman almost every time, even though there are no visible reasons for that.

and one day cartman just freaks out because he’s tired of faking, and if kyle doesn’t like the real cartman, than fuck him. and he finally asks him out the way he truly wanted – with mean jokes, rude behaviour, they just go to kfc and then sit at home watching dumb horror movies in cartman’s bedroom. and that was the first time they kissed – the first time in a long time when kyle saw cartman’s real self. and oh boy did he missed it.

[sprinklepartyfall]

So, in light of this, and finding out Bloodmoon died apparently, the brainrot began, enjoy.

@o-i-w-u pspspspsps-

The trick board.

(Spirit/Monster?) Bloodmoon twins x Reader

[Insignificant Warnings: This is medium-long in length, I did not proofread this, it basically gets cut off as a cliffhanger at the end.]

In a far off timeline, the world was shattered. Chaos from the breakdown of the leaders and the cowardly actions of the followers. Luckily, you never liked people, so you were already pretty skilled at avoiding them, yay anti-social behavior-!

As a lone survivor, you learned pretty fast that most easy things were probably a trap made by other survivors. You had been currently walking around a store, sneaking around the people already there to grab supplies and go. That was before you heard them... talking to themselves? To air maybe?

Once you got a closer look, it seemed they'd been trying to use an ouija board... how someone could find one was a mystery, and why they would keep it was beyond you. But it was funny that they tried, and quite clearly failed to talk to whatever ghost or demon they were trying to find.

You stuck around, mostly since they were arguing and, well, it was over something stupid and you needed entertainment. That was when you got one idea, it only seemed to be three people... so you stole the ouija board while they were distracted, causing quite the fright when they noticed. Chaos was one thing that would never leave the broken world you lived in, and that was somehow a small comfort for you.

You'd left the building, walking through the shadows with your newly acquired item as the yelling of panic fades behind you. Was it mean? Yes. But was it funny? Hell yeah. The board, along with its little planchette, was under your arm.

You walked to an abandoned park nearby, climbing up a tree burgrudgingly so you wouldn't be spotted, and set the board down. You didn't expect it to work, so you didn't bother trying, unlike the probable ghost that made it quite clear it wanted to talk. You nearly fell out of the tree when you saw it start moving, firstly because that was definitely not just the wind, and Secondly because that's not how it worked...

The piece went to the 'hello' area showing this was happening whether you wanted it to or not, you did not get a say in this. But of course, after a couple minutes of stunned silence, the spirit spoke again; 'R-E-S-P-O-N-D–T-O–U-S' that wasn't comforting, that wasn't comforting at all, there were MULTIPLE.

"...Hi..." You mumbled out warily, panicking a lot more internally than externally. 'H-E-L-L-O' The spirit spelled out, even though there was a spot that already said hello- 'Y-O-U–L-I-V-E' The spirit pointed out, making you tense even more, maybe you were just insane? That would probably be... worse actually... "I am." You responded hesitantly, glancing around to make sure you weren't about to die some cruel death.

'W-H-Y–T-E-N-S-E' oh gee, you wonder why, it totally isn't the fact you're probably haunted or cursed now. "No reason." You stated simply, because you aren't going to be a jerk, that would be rude. "Who are you?" Your tone was polite although with a hint of anxiety, which was probably not fine. Most people would run from this... in fact, you would have been too, if it weren't for the fact you were in a tree, and would probably just lay there in defeat if you fell.

'B-L-O-O-D-M-O-O-N' You had to pause at that name, it wasn't common at all and definitely didn't scream "I'm friendly!" But you were probably stuck with it in some way now. "...nice to meet you." You responded politely, how else were you supposed to react to this? You were an anxious introvert and this was a potentially bloodthirsty ghost, not a great combination.

'Y-O-U–S-M-A-L-L' they pointed out, in which you weren't actually THAT small... so how tall was this ghost?? Apparently, much taller than you. "Okay... why are you... talking to me?" You asked, ignoring the strange spirits words. 'Y-O-U–L-O-O-K–F-R-A-G-I-L-E' the spirit responded, a sudden chill running down your spine as it spoke. "...is that a good thing to you?" You responded sheepishly, tilting your head slightly as you spoke. Instead of an answer, however, the planchette was thrown at your head, hitting the tree behind you. A few small bits of bark fell from the trees trunk, and you felt so thankful that you tilted your head out of its way.

"Nope, nope, nope, nope-" You started repeating as you moved to get up, you were ready to climb down and run now, but that was before you were grabbed by something... maybe someone.

You yelped, yet it was muffled by a cold hand over your mouth, another wrapped around your waist as you were pulled into the tree. Your eyes wideneding before shutting completely, a dizzy feeling overwhelming your senses as you were taken away.

Once you had regained your senses, finally opening your eyes, you were met with a void and... a face strangely close to you. You flinched back, now noticing the feeling of someone holding you from behind as they had chuckled at your feared reaction. "Other, they are finally awake." The one in your face stated with a grin.

It seemed like it was themed after the moon, yet showed no sign of silver aside from the silver star on its chest... it had various shades of red adoring its large form. It was a good four, maybe five feet taller than you and god was it intimidating. It looked like some sort of beast, claws, sharp teeth bared in that eerie grin it showed you. It looked... scaly in a way, its skin looked rough with the fading scars along its chest, arms, and left hip. It wore some sort of navy blue robe of sorts, yet it didn't cover much of its appearance like most would, more so just... kept it warm, maybe?

"Indeed other! It seems they survived!" The one that held you, or 'other'? Spoke, its excitement clear. its appearance quiet similar to the other creatures, the only differences being its star was gold, it had less scars, and it felt a bit fuzzy...

"They seem confused." 'Brother' spoke, its voice holding clear amusement as it held your chin up. "Yes, but I like them like this." 'Other' stated mischievously, squeezing your form in its grip, earning a slight squeak from you. "W-where am I‽" you blurted out, finally choking out the words stuck in your throat.

"In a void." 'Brother' stated bluntly, its grin widening slyly as it looked you up and down. "But- no- why-" You stammered, trying to lean away from both of them, but you couldn't move much... you were trapped with them. "Relax, little human! We won't hurt you, much~" 'Other' teased, pressing you further into it with a smug expression. "I-I can't stay here! I need to go back!" You exclaimed, trying desperately to reason with them, but it only earned chuckles of amusement. "No, no. You can' leave..." 'Brother' trailed off, both their grips on you tightening possessively...

"You're ours now, human."

————————————————————————

[Oh my god, I contemplated giving up like three times while writing this. This is what happens when I get a prompt and make it up as I go. My notes app says this is like nine pages long too.]

[valiantstarlights]

Your personal trainer Dream is a gift that keeps on giving. And Hob being cutely oblivious and innocent about how Dream wants to break his back like a glowstick (in responsible manner of course). How would Dream react to;

A. Hob working out while wearing the #3 jacket

B. A gymbro, ignoring all survival instincts, and hitting on Hob while he's on the treadmill without Dream around

I love your work lots ❤️ 💕 💖 ♥️ 💜 💗

Thank you for the hearts 🥰 and for making me laugh with responsible back breaking. 😂 I'm glad you like my gym AU. 🙇‍♀️

A. Hob working out (or just being in the Endless Gym) while wearing Dream's 03 letterman jacket

Girl (gender neutral) you know Dream is going to be so smug about this. That's his (future) boyfriend right there, and no one can contest it, because Hob is already wearing his clothes and everyone knows what that means. 😏

He thinks he's super sneaky, and thank goodness Hob is as oblivious as he is, because if he catches wind of it, he'd become even more of a blushing mess, and would try to return Dream's clothes to him because he doesn't want to cause any misunderstandings. And that's the last thing Dream wants.

The staff would definitely start treating Hob differently. Not that they're treating him badly or anything, but they'll start treating him like he's a VIP.

And anyway, he's so sweet and nice and if anyone deserves to be treated like a VIP, it's him.

(IDK if I've mentioned this in the fic yet, but Endless Gym is a ✨️super fancy✨️ gym, and famous people actually go there to work out. The staff are used to treating actual VIPs, but they'll treat Hob like he's a tier above them, maybe just a step below the Endless siblings.)

Hob doesn't know why the staff is suddenly super extra nice to him, but he's happy about it and treats them super extra nicely in return. It's a very wholesome cycle of niceness, and through it all, Dream is so proud of him, internally yelling, 'That's my (future) boyfriend!'

B. A random gymbro hitting on Hob while Dream isn't around

CW: sexual harassment and rapey vibes, but nothing bad actually happens because the gym's staff are amazing and dream is very protective (understatement) of hob 🙏

Now why would Dream be absent? 👀 Meeting Hob is like, the highlight of his week.

Anyway, let's pretend that he's sick or smth and learns about what happened from Lucienne, who always keeps an eye out for potential bullying or sexual harassment cases.

I imagine that Dream would demand to watch the security footage (bc he's insane), so he'll see exactly what happened.

He'll see Hob just minding his own business, running on a treadmill, following the lesson plan even without supervision, just basically being a very good boy for Dream 😏, when this fucknugget man smiles smarmingly at him, hopping on the next treadmill and flirting with him.

Hob just looks confused, but Dream sees him just nod politely and return to his workout. Dream sees the man flirting harder, and Hob just not engaging with any of it, and he eventually leaves when the set time is done.

Dream is breathing fire when he sees the man move to follow Hob to the showers, but thankfully a couple of undercover guards (pretend it's a thing) walk up to the man and very politely tell him to stop it. The man is rude to them, but he doesn't push back and leaves when the guards keep their eye on him and loom menacingly near the showers.

Dream tells Lucienne to commend the two guards and give them a bonus, and focuses on recovering so he could return to work quicker.

When he gets back and sees fucknugget man working out (Hob isn't around because it's a day when he doesn't have a session with Dream), Dream walks up to him and says, "I heard about what happened the other day."

"Yeah," the man grumbles. He looks validated, because oh wow Dream Endless is talking to him. No doubt he'd be on his side. "I was just complimenting someone and some douchebags told me to quit it." He scoffs. "Man wasn't even worth it, to be honest. Just looking for someone to suck my cock, you know how it is, and he looked pathetic enough to want to do it."

Dream inhales, exhales, and smiles like he doesn't want to tear this man's throat out with his teeth.

He is going to ruin this man's life. He has already read through his file when he was still sick, and has contacted one of his private eye connections to investigate the man for anything that would get him in trouble. The bigger the dirt, the more Dream will pay.

"You should be careful," Dream says.

"Ha! Yeah. I'll corner him somewhere quieter next time. Do you think he'll come by later?"

"I mean," Dream says, still neutrally, even if there is a bit of a snarl in his voice, "you should be careful, because everyone has secrets."

(Dream blacklists him on the spot for his words about Hob alone. He then takes his anger out on a punching bag.)

(...He may have destroyed the punching bag.)

(I imagine Dream's private eye connection finds some shady embezzlement stuff on the guy and gets him fired, leaving him next to nothing after his company fired and sued him. The private eye thanks Dream for the tip because the company gave them a reward, but honestly Dream doesn't care about any of that because all he wants is for the man to never bother Hob again.)

[glosskirt]

we work .

Synopsis; Y/N enters the hallway of the college she chose. A music major. While walking, she passes by a door that says 'Recording Room' and hears someone yelling. After the yelling was a not-so-good singing voice. Who was this?

Genre; Somewhat fluff, what I find amusing, platonic, the start of romance

Warnings; A LOT of cursing, angy Yoongi

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

While walking around the campus of your new school, people were looking at you weirdly. Maybe it was because of your music-themed everything, but you're just really excited!

"Excuse me, where's the main office?" You asked a student. She just looked at you. How rude. You tried asking a couple more students, but they all gave the same reaction. While looking for more people to ask, you passed by a door. It was labeled 'Recording Room,' so, it was probably meant for the demo recordings of the songs the students make. What you heard inside was yelling. "What the hell?! Why can't you just hit the note?! It's A for fucks sake!" Is what you heard. After that, the person who was getting yelled at started singing. And, the yelling was probably necessary. The person's voice was really raspy, and he really couldn't hit the note. "Well maybe it's because you can't play the piano properly!" The singer yelled, exiting the booth. "You say A, but you're pressing B! The A key is here. Not here! They make different noises, you know!" He yelled in the pianist's face. "Yoongi, this isn't gonna work. Find someone else for this project." The pianist said, packing up his bags and leaving the room. When the pianist saw you on his way out, he looked at you with an annoyed face. "He's a hopeless case, don't even try." And left.

When you looked back inside the room, the singer, who's name is Yoongi, was crying. "Fuck, fuck... I'm gonna fail now! That dumbass ditched me,, this is the fifth time this has happened!" He cried. You felt bad for Yoongi. Wait a second... You can sing! You can definitely help him with whatever project he's doing! Without thinking, you entered the room.

"Hey, are you alright? I saw you crying." You said. He looked up at you, "Huh? Oh, I'm fine. Just had to deal with a bastard. No biggie." He said, sarcastically smiling. He picked up his things and was ready to walk out, but you spoke. "Are you doing a project?" You asked. He nodded. "Yeah, but I'm a shit singer. I'll probably fail." He said. Getting his beanie. "Can you play piano?" You asked. Approaching him. "Yeah, it's my first love. Of course I can. Wait, are you suggesting that we do the project together?" You nodded, enthusiastically. He ruffled his hair and asked, "Well can you sing?" You nodded again. He smiled. "Let's do this then! I need to pass this fucking semester." You laughed at his face.

"So this is the song I wrote. But, it's written for an alto. I'm guessing you're a soprano? Or are you an alto too?" He asked. Flipping through the pages of his notebook to find a blank page. "Yeah, I'm a soprano. Sorry." You said. "Oh, that's fine." He said, writing some stuff on the paper. "Can I hear you play the instrumental?" You asked. Wondering if Yoongi was going to let you hear. "First tell me your name. I need to write it for the grading paper." He looked up at you. "Y/N L/N." You said. He smiled, "Y/N? Nice name. My name's Yoongi. Min Yoongi. Nice to meet you, Y/N." He wrote your name down on the paper. And his handwriting was nice. After he did, he held his hand out. You took it, and you both shook hands.

He played his song for you. It was so beautiful. "It's called eight." You were amazed. A college student wrote better than how your parents wrote your life plan. "It's beautiful." You said, smiling at him. He looked back at you and smiled too. "It'll be more beautiful once we record the vocals. Are you ready? Do you need more practice?" He said, holding a thumbs up that would go to a thumbs down once or twice. "I think I'm ready." You said, standing up and heading to the recording booth.

He started the instrumental, and you sang to it. Carefully pronouncing the t's and d's. Making your hands flow to the melody, since that makes it easier. You stopped singing when it was Yoongi's turn. When you exited the booth, he smiled. "You have a mellifluous voice, do you know that?" He said, walking past you. You blushed while you sat in his chair. When he nodded, you played the instrumental and listened to his voice. It wasn't that bad. Maybe it's cause of the song choice him and the other guy chose. When he was done, he exited the booth. "Sorry, we can't share the chair. If you want, I can work on the floor." He said. Moving his equipment to the ground. "No, it's okay! I'll sit on the floor. You deserve the table." He pouted and moved his equipment back onto the table.

While he was working, you got a little tired and rested your head on his leg. He caressed your head for a bit before getting back to work.

"We sound beautiful together." You mentioned.

"We work." He smiled.

"Huh?"

"What? It's the truth."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

yayayayayayayay

tagging; @haecien

[sylvies-kablooie]

I hope the anonymous ask doesn’t get ruined for you! There are so many rude people for no reason :(

What are your thoughts on the new episode? How do you think the next one will go?

thanks so much! this is gonna be lengthy so i'm gonna put an expand thingy if i can- never have done it before so bear w me lol. below the read more will be my hot takes regarding Dox, Victor, pie scene, etc

if i can get enough work done this weekend, i'm hoping to give some of the new episodes a rewatch. when i see them for the first time, my brain can get really caught up on what is happening what is happening that it prevents me from taking in the finer details that make the show so enjoyable. i think this has been compounded by s2 focusing a lot more heavily on racing the plot forward rather than allowing for characters to process things slowly, so i would like to give them another go knowing what will happen and having my fine-detail lenses on.

that being said, the new episode did catch me off guard! i knew a plot twist was coming because it had been teased, but the victor spagettification was NOT what i saw coming and it actually made my jaw drop. i had assumed the spaghetti line to be a throwaway one so having it actually pay off was wild. it was a noble end for victor, although i wish we had gotten a chance to spend more time with him because i thought he was very compelling.

something i was conflicted on was taking Dox and her group back into the TVA and then having b-15 ask them to come back because she knows deep down they are good after they had just killed an unknown number of people and we saw them witnessing that grief in real time (this was especially the case w B-15, who was heartbroken!). narratively speaking i didn't find that super compelling and others have addressed their problems with that better than i have. HOWEVER dox and the others being squished? was also not what i saw coming, especially after that wtf thing between Dox and Brad. i have no idea if we'll ever get answers on that! but i wish we got to see more of Dox- maybe she'll come back around.

sylvie yelled at mobius, people got mad at his, but it was clearly building up to something that is going to pay off in a later episode. and honestly- was she wrong? why is he being so chill about this all? this is going to be investigated later, and i would venture to guess it's because he's pretending everything is fine and cool when in reality all he knows and loves is collapsing around him. seeing that lead to discourse rather than people understanding it as foreshadowing made me lose a little faith in people's media literacy LMAO.

sylvie. my beloved. we saw her smile over killing HWR and I thought that was really interesting, something i will probably write a whole meta on later- hint: i think she is both genuinely proud of and sorrowful over her actions. her conversation with loki in the pie room was something i highly enjoyed. hope is hard. that being said, i was hoping for more dialogue between them. they're still circling everything. BE BRAVE AND SAY WHAT U WANT TO SAY LOKI. BUT them teaming up against Brad was LEGENDARY. screaming "turn it off"? are you kidding me!!!! LOVED IT. Loved the "Are you okay" and "tech savvy" callbacks. mwah it was so good.

i have no idea what the new episode will bring beyond hopefully that bar scene finally and also the scene where sylvie gets to listen to her records because those were featured in the trailer and we still haven't gotten them yet! obviously it isn't the end of the world, but what does it mean? a great question! was the TVA all for nothing? how would that impact our characters, realizing everything they knew was a lie? great motivation i hope we will have time to explore!

thanks so much for the ask and allowing me to ramble! i hope to have more time to go over things again with an even finer toothed comb, so if i can get all my homework done you can expect more analysis :)

[gray-soul]

What your Valorant main says about you in my perspective after playing Valorant for some time (and as a Cypher main):

Brimstone - Oh I can trust you with everything, Daddy Brim for the win. You either have a ton of lineups for that molly which land and you often clutch or if you're a new Brim enjoyer you die inside as your lineups don't land and the enemy gets the win. You're either very responsible, or just like how much of a meme he is. I like ya.

Viper - You're either a mean egirl, or just some guy that swears he only plays her because he can't smoke. We all know you're just here for her hotness, which I can't argue with. I don't recall many bad Vipers, and as I play as her sometimes you're a solid person.

Omen - oh come on who doesn't main Omen. He is a solid character that has a good kit, good background and is overall fun. You're either an edgy kid that tps instead of walking or you're actually just a chill m8. Please if you play in low elo learn how to smoke, it is painful to see some of these smokes fr. No Agos, I will not main him just because he looks cool. Also some of you that play as Omen are actual sweethearts that smoke me if I ping, and I appreciate you for that.

Killjoy - You're either fun, or you instalock and then tell me the most obvious fact about placing trips. If you instalock KJ and then force me to fill, well you're rude. Don't do that. I used to main KJ and please for the love of God change that turret position sometimes. Sometimes maining KJ is a phase, other times it's a lifestyle. Get off tiktok while you're chilling in backsite and maybe sometimes get off B on ascent. Everyone knows the KJ setup on B ascent and it's boring af /j. Overall you're chill, unless you get on my nerves with using your alarm bot on flank when there's already my trip there.

Cypher - You have good taste my friend. Even though it pains me when you don't have any setups, or when you place a bad trip on flank. Just kneel, and get that damn trip at the right hight. But overall you're fun if you know anything about using his utility, but you're making me cringe if you don't use the damn utility at all. Trip flank well, use that damn camera flash, and don't play like a duelist.

Sova - You probably played CS before switchinf to Valorant. You're most of the time a chill person, sometimes you steal avaragejohnas's lineups, sometimes you make your own. I love teaming up with a Sova and destroying people. You're cool, but the disrespect I feel when you kill me with a shockdart is agonising

Sage - Unpopular opinion, I don't like bad Sage mains. Specifically battle Sages. Oh for heaven's sake IF I PLACED A TRIP ON FLANK DON'T WASTE THE DAMN WALL TO COVER IT! This should be common sense! Your wall has so much potential bro! Or when you revive someone just to waste your ult at the end of the round, or when you only heal yourself. But. If you're a good Sage, I bow and kneel to you. Because you are a mountain.

Phoenix - Flash me again and I will find and punch your ass.

Jett - You're dead.

Reyna - A lot of times I have more kills than you, and yet you're calling me bad fr. You go mid and don't do entry then die giving the enemy a number advantage orrr you're afk. There was only one Reyna main that was fun to play with and it was an 11 year old boy.

Raze - eghem: "MY TRIPSS NOOOOOO" I yell after a Raze nade destroys my trip. I like my team Raze, because you're chill, probably love movement characters and have a good music taste, but the enemy Raze always makes me dead inside.

Breach - Oh you're cool I like you. Basically the same reaction as with Brim mains. You're a solid part of the team.

Skye - Flash me again and I will kill you part 2. You're either a great source of info, or you're a troller. You're alright ^-^

Yoru - You either troll or pop off. Flash me again and I'll kill you part 3

Astra - Never seen a bad Astra main. You're probably having the time of your life playing this forsaken game. You're smiling after basically getting match mvp and drinking tea. You're a great person.

Kay/O - flash me again and I'll slay you part 4, I love a good Kay/O main, and sometimes I wish I was you. Kay/O is hot.

Chamber - You're popping off too hard, and Riot next patch will nerf you. Or you're a child, or a simp.

Neon - Please stop only buying a judge just so you'll have funky clips. 90% of the time it doesn't work. Other then that you're a very chill person.

Fade - Emo girl or an Emo boy. You're very chill, miss your lineups if you even have them and basically chill.

Harbor - You.... exist? Wow. Yeah Harbor can be hard, and if you master him, congrats! But I do have a lot of clips where I destroy Harbors...

Gekko - Let's be Honest you would die and will die for your silly animals. Wingman stole your heart.

Deadlock - Instalock her and I'll laugh in your face. I'm sorry but she's imo one of the worst Sentinels. Please choose a better character... please.

Anyway, this was made in a /j manner. Don't come after me if you feel insulted. This is all for fun and you should play who you want to play ^-^.

[pine-tree-system]

I think for the sake of system communication and recovery, I'm gonna say I'm endo/genic.

Now now, hear me out-

Denial sucks ass and it's hard to beat. Especially without a therapist and/or a diagnosis. Hell, even with one, it's a tough beast to grapple with. And when I do grapple with it, when I try to fight it, it fights back even harder and I always go back to square one.

But well, if I might it half way... Maybe I can do better. Maybe it's easier to talk with my parts now.

Cause I know I have trauma. I know I have dissociated parts. I know I have sucky memory. And I know that putting it altogether looks a hell of a lot like CDD. But that doesn't make it easy to say that I have it. I know it exists and if this were someone else, I would've said "yeah, that could be a CDD. You oughta see a specialist!"

But the moment it becomes Me + CDD, right in the same sentence without any arguments... Suddenly, I want nothing to do with any of my parts. Or my trauma. Or my amnesia. I cannot have a CDD. I just can't. Don't tell me otherwise because the denial just can't allow it. It does not want recovery.

But maybe, just maybe, if I say I'm endo, maybe it'll make it easier. It's easier to say I'm endo with trauma (what an oxymoron lol) than I have a CDD. And because it's easier, it'll also be easier to talk with my parts. It'll be easier to journal too. And deal with trauma. Recovery will be easier.

Maybe. Just a little experiment. Feel free to politely argue otherwise. I know endos can be a trigger for some folks and I'm no stranger to going into fight mode due to triggers. I just don't wanna fight with you, person with good intentions.

Edit:

I'm gonna make it clear tho. I'm calling MYSELF endo. Whatever you are, that's your business. You know yourself. I'm not gonna say you're endo because your trauma doesn't look like trauma. That's rude as fucking hell, at the very least.

And also, it's actually less of saying I'm endo and just... Pretending I'm endo. Like, pretending I'm mixed origins despite contradictory evidence. Just so I can get from point A to point B. It's easier than trying to bash my denial away and yelling at it how I actually have a CDD. It doesn't wanna play like that. It wants to be a fucking idiot and say "oh sure. You have the symptoms and the common experiences and our recovery was pretty good when we acknowledged our systemhood. But you're not a system. You're a dramatic, sensitive, ableist, faking attention-whore. :)"

Like, thanks, denial. :/

But I'll spoon-feed my denial some good ol' endo-mixed origins BS, just in case it'll allow other alters to talk. So I can just... Communicate, check in with everyone, allow all my parts to talk. Allow every piece of myself to have a voice. Even if it really turns out that I don't have a CDD, I at least allowed the entirety of myself to have a voice and I'll treat myself better. Better than repression.

[angie-long-legs]

First of, thank you for talking to me, and being honest. I can tell that it's hard, so I'm proud of you for pulling through, for what is worth. Now, let me tell you a story.

One day, Person A and Person B happened upon each other. It doesn't matter how, it doesn't matter when. Somehow, they ended up at the same room, in the same time, and they really hit it off. The conversation was good, Person B was so charming it was almost obnoxious, and it sweeped Person A off their feet!

It was odd because Person B was by no means perfect. They had some unhealthy habbits, maybe were a little bit rude to others, put to Person A, they were perfect. Romantic, affectionate, considerate, caring, attentive, and a good lover. What more could Person A ever ask for? It felt just like a dream.

As time went on, Person B got just a little less perfect. They were tired, sometimes. A bit grumpy here and there. But that's normal. Everyone has bad days. The honeymoon phase doesn't last forever and Person A knows that all too well. They struggle too. But being a couple isn't about thriving during the honeymoon phase. It's about loving and supporting each other through hard times. If it had stopped at that, everything would be fine.

But it didn't. It wasn't a few bad days and a few arguments, followed by communication and compromises, followed by forgiveness and moving on. It was bad. Really bad. Those bad moods of Person B's kept becoming more and more frequent, and increasingly worse. They got mean, their words hit like punches. They would yell so much over things like the house being messy or the coffee being cold or all the things that Person A is convinced they should have thought of before. Because if they had, then Person B wouldn't be upset and this wouldn't have been happening.

Because they know their lover. Person B isn't like that normally. They're not.

They just want Person A to do better, so that the relationship can function again. That's fine. Person A can do that. After all, Person B is just so perfect, they deserve a lover that can do better than what Person A is doing right now.

And person A really tried. They did everything they could think of to please Person B. Despite the situation going from bad to worse. Despite the words of Person B hurting like punches, by that point, and their punches hurting even more, somehow. Person A really tried. Because one day, they'd manage to apply all the corrections Person B gave them, and they'd become somebody worthy of who Person B used to be. And everything will go back to normal, Person A is sure of it.

Because they know their lover. Person B isn't like that normally. They're not. Right?

Because if they were, they wouldn't have been so sweet and charming at the beginning. They changed because of something Person A did, so if they correct they'll mistake, everything will work out.

Right?

But maybe Person B is like that. Maybe they are mean. Rude. Aggressive. Violent. Abusive. Maybe that's what they always were. But how could Person A not have seen it?

Because they don't show it. Because abusers never showed it. Think about it, if you met a person that bragged about how terrible they are, you wouldn't go out with them, would you? Person A wouldn't either. So how did they end up here?

Person B lied. They always do. This brand of people act like that. They lie, and they pretend to be good, and they switch up only after you get attached because then, they live in the certainty of their victim never leaving, because they need them now. They need their painful words to turn sweet again. They long for it and they'll stay until it happens, because they need it.

There's lots of recorded victims of abuse. There's not enough recorded abusers. How it that possible? Because those motherfuckers know where to hide. How to hide. They know how to manipulate. They know how to lure you into a false sence of security. They know how to make you attached, make you stay. And they know how to put on a charming face and do it all over again. They do it all the time.

It's not your fault for falling for it. It's not person A's fault for falling for it either. It's no one's fault that they fell for it, how could it be? It's one person looking for love against whichever person B, that lies like breathing. It's not easy to see it, that's why nobody does.

If it's your fault for falling for it, if it's your fault for not knowing how to detach, then is it everyone else's fault too? Is every Person A to blame for meeting Person B? Doesn't that sound off?

Just because you miss who a person used to be, that doesn't mean you like or want who they are now.

response to this ask

"Look, I get it. I see what yer tryin' ta do here, and I ain't gonna try and tell ya that this type a' relationship is... good, or that it's okay ta treat people like that. I know it ain't. I know that what we have, me an' Val, it ain't... normal or healthy or any a' the stuff Charlie likes ta preach about, but it ain't all bad, I swear!

"The thing is... I know his game. I know that's all it is ta him, a game. But... it feels so good when I'm winnin'. When he leads me down that path an' makes me feel like I matta' ta him, like it ain't a game at all. And I... play along, ya know? Cuz I wanna hear him say it. I wanna feel it. He can pretend he loves me, and I can pretend I believe him.

"What I'm sayin' is, I know. I know Person B in yer little psych class experiment is bad, I know what Val does ain't right. But lemme put it in your terms fa just one moment: what if Person A knows it? What if they know they're bein' manipulated, that they're gonna keep gettin' hurt, but they go back anyway? Don't that make me- them... well, there's gotta be somethin' wrong with 'em, ta stay with someone when ya know they're doin' ya so wrong. Ya gotta be a special brand a' fucked up ta stick around when yer fully aware he's gonna switch up on ya, make ya pay fa wantin' him so bad. Ain't that at least some kinda... flaw?"

[ask-the-wage-trio]

Kelly, worst thing that happened on the job

"Oh, don't even get me started.. theres.. there's a lot of things, but out of all of them, I'd say I really didn't like this one incident with this weird old guy who came in one night. Skid and Pump just ended up coming in again because they wanted some sweets, but then he came in and practically started yelling at them for no reason just because they were in his way. And then when I asked him what he wanted, or tried to—he just interrupted me and basically demanded to know where the nearest matches were! And even when he came back with the counter with the matches, he was insufferable to deal with. Not to mention, I'm pretty sure I saw him down the street somewhere, so chances are he might live near me. Ughh.. god. I hate people who are mean to kids. Knowing that guy, he's probably some weird old man who'll just die alone."

"Uh.. isn't—that kinda harsh?"

"It's not harsh if he was being rude to some random 8 year olds who basically did nothing to him. I hope he drops his matches on accident and b—..okay, yeah, maybe that's too far. I'm.. ugh.. I just got really mad when that happened. I dunno. Sorry. Anyway.. next ask, I guess."

[la-appel-du-vide]

08•19•23 - Glacier National Park Day Two

We did get an earlier start on day two, even if it wasn’t as early as we’d hoped. We had a lot to accomplish, so we had to get moving pretty quick. We were able to get some breakfast sandwiches to start the day, so we were already off to a better start than the day before. We made our way back up the Going-to-the-Sun road, and it was far less visible today. There are so many wildfires in the area, and they took their toll on air quality today. We couldn’t see nearly as far or as well. And the temperature had dropped probably 20 degrees from the day before as well. I can’t believe how much it changed in just one night. But obviously still a beautiful drive. The tunnels and rock arches under the roadway are so fun.

The first stop of the day was the Logan Pass parking lot, where we’d base camp for a couple of hikes. It’s SUPER popular to park up there, and people end up just driving around and around forever waiting for someone to leave. Eventually we just parked at the end of one of the aisles to wait, rather than continuing to drive in circles. That way, we’d be watching one aisle consistently for someone to leave, and would be the first in line when it happened. It took maybe 20 minutes, but finally someone was ready to leave. As that happened, another Jeep pulled into the aisle from the other direction, and tried to take our spot. We’d been there longer, B signaled first, and he was still trying to stake claim to it, which is so rude and annoying. The park ranger came over to us to direct us up the aisle a little bit, and then said she’d make sure we got the spot. Then she noticed the other Jeep, and said she’d go stand in front of him so we’d get it, even though it would make him mad, and boy did it. He opened his door and started yelling at her while we parked, and then he pulled around in front of us just to blare on the horn and aggressively flip us off. It was so insane, and I couldn’t help but laugh. I was slightly worried he’d key our car or slash our tires because he was that mad, but truly unhinged behavior. It was so clear that we’d been there first. But WHATEVER. We were on guard looking for him the rest of the time we were up there though - we did not want another encounter.

Our first hike today was up to the Hidden Lake Overlook. It wasn’t too bad, and a lot of it was on a boardwalk. It was much colder today, and jackets were required even while hiking. The lake was beautiful from above. We could have hiked down to it, but it would have taken much longer, and we had more things to do. I am glad we got to actually be at Avalanche Lake, so that made up for it.

We stopped by the visitor’s center to get the keychain and postcards I mentioned earlier, and B got some playing cards and stickers as well. And then we headed over to the Highline Trail. This was my favorite hike of the day - I was obsessed. It’s a trail that follows the alignment of the Going-to-the-Sun road, and it runs along the edge of the cliff as well. It’s skinny and feels like an adventure, while also providing gorgeous views the entire time. It is about 12 miles to hike the whole thing, so we decided just to hike a mile or so in before turning around, and it was absolutely worth it. It’s basically flat the whole time, and if I had more time I would have hiked more of it, but I’m so glad we did as much as we did! I loved it!

We stopped by the goat boardwalk again, and once again, no goats. Let down.

It was 3 by this point, so we were able to enter other areas of the park. We went up to Many Glacier, which is a piece of the park falling on Reservation land. Mikayla told us she’d had better luck with wildlife on that side of the park, and we were on a mission to see some. As we were driving along the road to enter the park from that side, we saw a bunch of cars pulled over and were hopeful that it would be something to see, and it WAS! A grizzly bear, walking along the lakeshore in the distance! We were so happy to see him, and we watched him walk along for awhile. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a wild grizzly before, so that was very cool. Once we got into the park, we pulled over with the masses again, hoping there were sheep or something, but there ended up being two black bears up on the mountain! Also so cool! They were actually huge, and we sat watching them for a bit as well. We drove through Many Glacier, and saw the iconic Swiss inspired hotel on the lakeshore, and I would absolutely love to stay there. You’d wake up to the coolest views every day! But still no goats or sheep the entire time. On our drive back out, we saw another grizzly (possible the same one) swimming in the lake, before making his way out and up. Cute that he was swimming.

The final hike of the day, and the trip, was back along the Going-to-the-Sun road. It was a hike out past Saint Mary Falls to Virginia Falls. We were starting the hike just after six, so we were hustling to make it there and back before it started to get dark. I was proud of how fast I was hiking, despite being so tired after going all day long, but we really hauled. We made it to Saint Mary Falls in no time at all, and it had an impressive amount of volume coming down. Mikayla said people cliff jump off that bridge, but that looked very scary to me haha. I would have to watch someone do it before I’d be brave enough to do it myself. Then we continued on to Virginia Falls. We stopped at the lower falls to watch some people cliff jumping into the swimming hole before, and that was pretty cool. The height wasn’t bad, but I was pretty sure the shock of the water might kill me on impact. So we moved along to the upper falls. They were so tall and magnificent. I enjoyed it so much! Since I still need to experience the Glacier water, I went out to stand under the waterfall. It really was SO cold, but I’m glad I did it. The waterfall was powerful and magical. We walked around the falls and wading pools, and froze our feet off, before hiking out. There is so much blue, blue water in the park, and I don’t understand how that happens. But I love to see it!

We made it back out in good time, and then made one final stop at the goat boardwalk. And sadly, there were still no mountain goats or big horn sheep. I wonder if all the wildfires have scared the goats away? Everyone we talked to was also really sad about not seeing any, and always on the lookout for some. We did ironically see another bear - we think another grizzly - while we were there. He was hanging out under the Going-to-the-Sun road, just digging and chilling. We think there may have been a cub there as well, but it’s so hard to tell for sure from so far away. I was FREEZING by that point though, being wet and it only being 45 degrees, and the sun being down and the wind picking up…. I was ready to be back in the car.

We enjoyed our final drive down for now, and tried to really take the view in. It’s sad to say goodbye. We didn’t get out of the park until it was dark, and so I never got my picture by the Glacier National Park sign. I also didn’t get to try a huckleberry shake or treat since everything was closed by the time we got out. So I guess there are my reasons to come back - plus, the goats!

We ate dinner at a Whitefish bar. The bathrooms were lined in pornographic photos, which was a shock to me hahah, what the. The food was pretty mid, but it was dinner nonetheless! Then it was off to bed for us. My knees were feeling it from so much hiking, and I was so happy to collapse into bed.

We got an early start the next morning for the long drive home, which is so much more tolerable in the daylight.

I absolutely loved it, and hope to be back to that magical place someday! Until then, I’ll be dreaming of those wildflowers. xx

[the-firebird69]

It's a huge day and there's a lot of people asking this guy why he is going into history and why it's all wrong and who is saying they are and who sort of get something he's experienced it and he's a rude bastard about it and still says he's somebody it's horrible.

Movie the messages on and they're sacrificing military person because they think it will do something and it doesn't it attracts them the one that came was pretty big it's about 80 ft tall and it'll be back cuz it's hungry and she's a witch and she's an idiot and the guy doesn't make it it looks familiar to everyone but it's not they know who he is he's Sergeant level and the mist is going to happen shortly too but for real they are not bugs and they're not crabs they're very deadly Kaiju

He says that while you make some mistakes you know and the same they have all this food and stuff that's another thing that you are stupid about if you put the food out there it's like a dog but really like a bug so the guy is frightened me so we put it out there and they're going to come back and she's going no they're not I said yeah they are and it's your problem and we can't do anything because if you put you out there there's more of them will come hey such a yelling and the other say wait a minute this is stupid what you did is stupid did you need a form of radar to find your cars to get the hell out of here and unfortunately they can sense radar and sonar if you drive fast enough maybe something will survive that freaked them out and the guys like I remember all this these are monsters that are very fast and if you lost your opportunity or even to draw them off they got really mad at the b**** so if your phone is working you have to stop her and obviously I don't like the military so they got that so the military eventually came and yeah they were having trouble and Drew them off and they left and they said this he didn't like them up there very much they deserved it over all his pastoring him and threatening the guns and everything but that's a horrible way to die but it got us out and it shot a bunch of them so the guy didn't die in pain and they put the lady on trial and they hung her and shot her and burned her in front of everybody

There's a lot going on here and tonight too they're picking up a lot of people there's more rules and other going into effect there is a curfew it was announced again there's a lot of people.. and there's a lot of people who are mad they're angry and upset they don't want to see these things or hear about it and it's coming at them pretty hard they don't understand what's happening to them or what's happening around them when it's explained they go catatonic and they're mostly more luck and they can't handle anything and they need to leave we have instructions now to ours on what to do and it's happening we don't want to hear this stuff everyday it's terrible they keep repeating the same things threats and idiotic comments and I'll tell you what they're useless people and we're putting them out and there's a ton of people in the perimeter they're trying to attack they're people from here going out there they're 50 households left of the Macklemore lock and there are 25 open houses. 30 households might go to the inside ring right now 10 are committed and 30 would definitely make a huge difference and they will be a week weekend and many of the parties were here we're not will not continue to come here or come to Florida. And several other things happening here and they are very intense.

-there's more things happening people are figuring out these clones are trying to activate cages these guys are leaving on ships and want people to be occupied

We're going to publish

Thor Freya

Finally

Hera Zues

Olympus