#and bedridden in bed
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INTERESTING
YOUR JIN AND YIN ANSWER WATERED MY CROPS. It was AMAZING! But now I gotta ask one more thing that's been on my mind. I know that SWK and Mac always have a super complicated and interesting dynamic when you write them, especially in your AUs. So I have got to ask something that has been digging into the back of my mind. How much are you willing to info dump about howmst the fuck their whole deal works in Valleys AU?
Hear that? That's the sound of thousands of guns aiming at my followers' hearts. Thank you Skelle
A small disclaimer before reading: I see ShadowPeach as a queerplatonic relationship. I am aroace and will try my goddamn best to explain their relationship in the best way I can but please keep in mind of how they're meant to be seen as you read through this post.
When it comes to how Macaque views Sun Wukong, at first, it is of an unhealthy position based off their rankings and status; Sun Wukong is the King to the four Generals he's named and trained in the means of having four separate minds whom he can trust and go to for advice when it comes to making war tactics and strategies that he himself has not thought up of and, in turn, improving them and leading a kingdom that loves and devotes itself to him. Macaque is not free from this. In fact, he does care for Sun Wukong in the same kind of devotion a follower would have for their leader, he trusts and learns to head the warnings of his King, eventually leading him to blindly trusting Sun Wukong despite the Sage's mistakes and behaviors that are deemed, in several ways, awful by the standards of human kind and yet Liu'er Mihou trusts that his King is doing the right decision at the end of the day—but what made them fall apart in the first place was that he tried, desperately, to cling to these new found emotions that he did not comprehend himself.
When discussing the romantic part of ShadowPeach, let it be clear that Sun Wukong has expressed no romantic feelings towards anyone in the book or in the show and neither has Macaque and, personally, I highly doubt either of them will in the heteronormative way other ships and pairings do. The core truth that demons do not understand the customs and ideals of humans is something very important when discussing two demons who, in fact, are just that: demons. They have their own customs and ways of courting other demons, their own language and, as I assume, their own way of living seeing as Sun Wukong thought it was fine to steal a man's clothes and ran off to find his first Master with said clothes without asking nor apologizing to the traumatized individual. Turning back to Macaque's own feelings, they were not made out of "love" nor was ever going to be "love".
What Macaque felt towards the King that he fought alongside with and carried on to the point of wanting chasing the demon hundreds of years after their last encounter was obsession. It was unhealthy from the moment he decided to devote his life to following Wukong's words. What most people fail to realize is that Macaque is quick to say that others who do not share the same views as him are in the wrong; he does not change his perspective no matter how many times you beat it into him and it's highly apparent in the show. He's obsessed with Sun Wukong to the point of putting him on a pedestal, seeing himself and the other generals are inferior to the Sage, which is what would have left to a rather toxic relationship and Sun Wukong tries to break this tie by denouncing him of his position and ranking as general/marshal. He even tries to play victim in attempt to keeping Sun Wukong with him.
“I’ve been with you for years! I’ve been with you longer than those two pathetic idiots have!” Lies are spilled to a canvas, painting a scene of blood on a field of acacias. “You’re nothing without me! You—I saved you! Wukong—Sun Wukong, I have been with you for a hundred years, I was there when you were crowned king! I waited for seven years for you to return from achieving your immortality! I have never left your side!” Lies. Deceit. Wukong sees his arms tremble from his peripheral. The Jade Emperor must be getting impatient. “I am your greatest general!”
Wukong himself felt a sense of friendship towards Macaque and it never evolved past that as he was not, in the past, a good person in the yes of humans. He was a trickster and a thief and fought with Heaven out of anger and because he was painted as the villain. In Valleys, Sun Wukong screams and cries for forgiveness in his actions and asks the gods why he was painted as the villain in the end when all he did was be born and learn his master's teachings. What Macaque sees, moments prior to Sun Wukong fighting Heaven, is someone he would die for. That is not what Sun Wukong ever asked for from Macaque and never will. Sun Wukong himself is self-sacrificial to the point where he gains trauma from it in multiple ponts in his life. To say that Wukong didn't care for Macaque is untrue; he says these things to isolate Macaque from himself and have him become his own person because there is a line between loving someone and devoting your entire personality around them.
The wind howls quietly, urging him to leave. “You’ll die.” Wukong’s voice loses its glamour; the sweet peach blossom sprouts a flower layered of tender skin, sweet flesh but the animal’s teeth sink into the pit and spill its poison, an acid that consumes the taste of spring and replace it with pollution; Sun Wukong is a demon well aware of this poison. “You are one of my best friends, my most trusted allies. But you will die. You can die, Liu Er, regardless of whether or not your name is in that damned book—have you gained immortality in the same ways I have? Do you know of the secrets that my master whispered to me when I was younger? Liu Er, do not look at me with those eyes. Do not let this fill you hate. I am not abandoning you. I wish for you to be safe. I want you to leave—survive without me in your life. I am not the best person to be around.”
Sun Wukong's priorities at the time were to fight Heaven, he had no intentions of playing along with Macaque's "feelings" towards him and even advices him to be happy with this development as the Monkey King is well aware of how he is affecting his Marshal without meaning to. Sun Wukong isn't blind to the ways that Macaque is behaving towards him but one must understand that Wukong is the one who is pushing away from Macaque for his own good while Macaque is pulling him back for his own personal gain. He craves something that he doesn't understand as is the traditional sense of "wanting someone to love you and kiss you and tell you they love you right back" is the supposed "normal" way to handle these feelings instead of thinking there is an alternative option to the certain type of love you are experiencing towards someone.
The situation gets worse when you realize that Macaque and Sun Wukong essentially "grew up" together and thus their understanding of love is the same, which is what makes this moment a wake-up-call for both the reader and Macaque:
Liu Er says, in the most broken voice he can muster, “I love you. Don’t leave me.” And Wukong will allow historians to leave these words out, leave out the stoic expression he bares and the way he lifts his head and lulls it to the side. The King says: “I do not know the meaning of the words.” “Don’t leave me.” “May your life be good.” “I love you.” Wukong watches Liu Er become a single blur on the ground, the wound of the drums becoming a loud symphony in his ears. The clouds soon cover his path, a ground of white tainted peach by the setting sun, the King’s eyes singular golden slits as he says, amused, “No, you don’t.”
And even though this is considered their first "falling out", Wukong expresses, once again, his care towards Macaque in a brief moment of vulnerability:
Liu Er… I can’t apologize to you enough. Please don’t come for me.
When talking about ShadowPeach, we must realize the kind of people they are independently and how they affect each other when they cross the line and accept that they were willing to care in a way that is unique to themselves and no one else.
Take a moment to see how they couldn't have gotten together prior to the journey, during the journey nor immediately post-journey.
Sun Wukong is dealing with multiple things while Macaque is single-handedly making the situation more stressing in being too close in the worst way possible: Heaven has a target on Sun Wukong's back and Liu'er jokes about how Wukong will be able to beat them all when the King's tone is serious for once, dropping its glamour and addressing Macaque by his given name; when Macaque meets Sun Wukong again he impersonates him and tries to kill Tripitaka and then acts as the victim for having been abandoned and uses that as an excuse for his actions, further using Wukong's retaliation towards him as ammunition for his future plans; and currently Sun Wukong is dealing with two new apprentices—that of which are mortal and, to an extent, human, meaning he is stressed and tired due to worrying over these two and Macaque uses it as an advantage to get to Sun Wukong instead of talking to him directly.
Their relationship takes more than one apology, however, and it is derived from long lines of miscommunication and misunderstandings between each other and realizing that they are both equals rather than one being "better" than the other.
So how does shadowpeach work?
To put it easily: it's complicated and messy and they still make it work
This is where we come to the themes of the Sun and the Moon but not in the "soulmates" type of matter, but in the way that Macaque needs to realize that he "shines" solely because he stands in front of Wukong while calling him one of the worst people he has ever met in his life and that Wukong needs to realize that trying to be brighter than Macaque does nothing more than fuel the latter's hate towards him. Macaque needs to realize that the Sun is a dying star on the brink of collapsing and Wukong needs to realize that the Moon is harmless unless provoked by outside forces.
Now they talk about this. They discuss this. They talk about the awful way Wukong expressed he was uncomfortable with Macaque's obsession, Macaque comes to the realization he was putting Sun Wukong up on a highly unrealistic pedestal, they both hear each other's side to the stories before telling anyone else as this is between them and no one else. So they talk about it. They talk about their lives outside of each other and connect certain points where they agree or where they disagree. They discuss. They talk. They become friends slowly and gradually as the days go one and they keep talking. Because communication is the key factor; it is what builds and breaks their relationship so much. Wukong yells and Macaque yells back louder; Macaque screams and Wukong snarls at him with far more vigor. It goes on and on and they're imperfect in every way, making the other anxious and panicky because they realize the weight of their words too late after the damage has already been done and they have to work on it for so so long—but they keep talking. The moment Macaque bottles something up, it repeats the cycle and vice versa. Wukong hesitates to tell something to Macaque and it spirals. Because one of them jumps to conclusions and the other is not a psychic.
In terms of their actual relationship, when they work things out and have established a sense of comfort that they can express towards each other: it's not romantic. Nor is it ever fully platonic, either. It's something that's mixed in with the purpose of making each other happy and comfortable. Sun Wukong feels anger and guilt and comfort and peace when he's with Macaque; Macaque feels hatred and resentment and warmth and philia towards Wukong.
Taken from my other fanfiction, you can see where the narrative wants you to know that this isn't a typically kind of dynamic or relationship and how it is unique to them alone:
“You’re disgusting,” Macaque murmurs and that’s what makes Wukong feel as though the war had never happened and Heaven had been indifferent to his existence. Vile, crude, hideous, a monster—it’s not beautiful. Macaque has never called him that. He doesn’t know how to truly feel. Wukong lifts his left hand and runs it through Macaque’s hair, feeling out the small cuts that seemed to have formed over harsh claws sinking into the scalp, a coo of amusement leaving the Sage’s lips when he notices how long it must have taken to undo years of knotted fur in a day; the Great Sage settles his hand at the base of Macaque’s head, grabs a fistful of hair and pulls back slowly, tilting the shadow demon’s head up and up until they’re looking at each other. Red and purple locked in a silent conversation; Wukong’s smile grows feral. Macaque grows quiet, face twisted into a scowl, a subtle layer of red dusting the bridge of his nose.
+
“I’ve forgiven you,” Macaque says in a different voice. It’s sweet and delicate, reminds him of a chorus of wind instruments trying to lull tired children to sleep with their soft singing, and it brings back a memory that makes Wukong grip the handle of the door tightly. “For that day. It’s not ideal and it’s shit to say that when you’ve moved on—clearly—but I’m not here to hurt you. I never was.” “I know you’re not,” Wukong says carefully, his own voice softening. The breeze tugs gently at his fur, a hug that he can’t return no matter how hard he tries. “That’s not the problem.” “Then what is?” Macaque asks. Hopeful. Anxious. Unbearable. “The problem, Macaque, is that you refuse to talk to me as an equal,” Wukong extends a hand and watches as one of the orange leaves lands on his fingertips, turning gold and glowing bright: a message.
+
“Why would I want to trick you?” Wukong points out reasonably. “Precious, do you think I’d waste time and energy trying to convince you into doing something for me? To make a fool out of you?” Wukong’s expression is pure glee as Macaque snaps his head up to glare at him, the shadows hiding his face. There’s a faint glow that dims and darkens, Macaque’s grip on the wine bottles slipping; Wukong reaches out and grabs them, bumping his and Macaque’s shoulders together as he does, the warmth radiating from the shadow demon amplifying. “Maybe I would have, back then. If we were back on Flower Fruit Mountain, sure..” “Wukong,” Macaque breathes, exasperated.
+
“What are you thinking about?” Macaque asks, tilting his head to peer up at Wukong. He hesitates to move when Wukong flicks his gaze to look down at him through lidded eyes, his smile faltering. “Ba and Beng,” Wukong lies. Macaque purses his lips. “Of course,” he says and then, “Of course you are,” and then, “Why wouldn’t you be?” and then he grabs the neck of one of the wine bottles, graceful as he lifts himself; running his fingers over the long thing neck of the glass, the drag of his hanfu rasping against the wooden floor, taking hold of the wine glasses and filling them up with the velvety liquid, the fermented scent filling their senses. It means nothing to them, anymore, but it's sweet and melancholic against the ocean air. It means nothing to them.
And there's so much more.
They don't hate each other, they don't love each other. They find comfort in the other's presence, they embrace each other with the intention of murdering anything that prevents them from finding that same warmth only the other can provide—it's mutual.
It's not the love that could be said about the men and women who fall in love in the movies that they watch together with the kids during their downtimes, where they say "I love you" where it's based on pure romantic intentions; it's not the love between friends either because although they are friends outside of their relationship, Macaque would never confide in Ba the same things he talks to Wukong about and Wukong would never hold Beng's hand with the same intentions he would hold Macaque's hand.
Truly, they are the Sun and the Moon: confusing pieces of shit who live separately from each other but are also an important part of each other's lives, no matter who is bigger or stronger or louder or brasher. They balance each other out, too, for in the parts that Wukong lacks Macaque can easily provide and vice versa. Easily enough it is Wukong who can bring out the worst in Macaque and it's Macaque who can bring out the best in Wukong; they can easily rile and calm the other with the correct choice of words while outsiders will struggle. Sun Wukong has only ever truly allowed Macaque to touch his scars and allows him to see him in a calm, passive state that's melancholic and vulnerable; Macaque only ever allows Wukong to will away the glamour he puts up to cover up his fur and scars and mistakes lined along his body and allows him to make him smile in a way that's genuine and honest.
In conclusion: ShadowPeach Go Brr

#ask#analysis#🌿#shadowpeach#sun wukong#liu er mihou#macaque#lego monkie kid#valleys au#i COULD GO OFF ABOUT SO MANY OTHER VARIANTS TO THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND DYNAMIC#BUT I AM SO SO TIRED#knox and winter and lupin and kai sand watched me share the word counts and every time it felt like their eyes grew a little bit wider#like#hly shticdsncjkds#i am so so tired#i wrote this in oNE SITTING#while i am SICK#and bedridden in bed#im just staring at my screen rn hoping i wordered everything right#english isnt even my THIRD language and yet here ia m#writing about gay monkeys#addition#readmore +#meta
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Going away for a week…what do I tell them…..
#they are going to be in bed alllllll week#soso sleepy#honk shoo mimimimi#or I can pretend they are at a conference#and that’s why their not in my pocket#gregory house#james wilson#hilson#hate crimes md#greg house#hatecrimes md#or maybe this is when my Wilson gets cancer#but he heals in a week miraculously#but he is bedridden#do u fools even read my tags#not you person reading it#u are the loveliest#the fools are the ones who don’t read#laugh at them in secret for they do not know#house md
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i'm really enjoying your headcanons! as a fellow fengs enjoyer i have to wonder, how do you think things would have gone if nuwa contracted tianhuo instead of fuxi? i'm honestly curious (if miserable about) if it'd be the same kind of spiral into denialism and distraction as shown with nuwa or if it'd manifest any differrently for poor ol fuxi
Cracks knuckles
Ok so I have thoughts and feelings about this. So I’m gonna do a bulleted list.
I think Fuxi would have a full depression spiral. He isn’t as dependent on Nuwa like she is on him, so he isn’t going to try to keep her body alive, but that’s still his sister. He’s going to grieve.
I think he might throw himself into his work, trying to keep the district running. He will also take a lot of time to watch his and Nuwa’s old performances. He should NOT be waking up this often, but at this point he doesn’t really care.
There isn’t a Feng clan to secure the future of, after all. Not anymore. It’s just him, only him, and I don’t think he would be able to start a family. Not like this.
We know Fuxi didn’t really uhhh care much about the lower class who were dying in the streets. Even if he did, he tried to turn Nuwa’s eyes away from it, probably to spare her the pain. Regardless I don’t think he would do much outside of keeping his own bubble safe
Of course Eigong fucks that up anyway. She would prob have to sneak around or ask for other test subjects since Nuwa is already gone.
The empyrean district would be the same minus the rager going on. Fuxi would be holed up watching old performances.
Going through the district, you’d find Nuwa’s sol seal unguarded, but taking it will enrage Fuxi. That’s what would trigger his fight, because you disrespected his sister.
Fuxi just throws hands. Operas involve marital arts and dancing, so he has muscles and maybe some fighting chops too. He can just fucking Kill You. With his bare hands. Fuck em up Fuxi
My dude can barely get out of bed most days, but depression be damned he will kick ass
#nine sols#nine sols fuxi#I’m kinda obsessed with fuxi having an extreme depression arc#idk I wanna see that man with smudged days-old makeup and sitting in bed staring at the wall#we don’t have a ‘bedridden with depression’ sol in game#Shen’s headcanons
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one difficult thing about being homebound is there's nowhere i can fucking scream
#roomies would be happy to go on an errand or something while i hollered but. the neighbors.#mac.txt#homebound#housebound#bedridden#bed resting
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A Prayer From Bed / Bound
My bed is a shrine to stillness, to rest, to warmth, to intimacy, to love, to relaxation. In this space, I practice rituals of devotion. Here, I set down my worries. I create art. I sit with my pain. I share in pleasure. I say prayers in every action and every inaction. I honor my bedridden body in all of its glory. My disabled body is a temple, I am a humble priest. I will tend to it dutifully— by doing nothing.

#chronically couchbound#disability#disabled#cripplepunk#cripple punk#disabled pride#disability pride#bed ridden#bedridden#bed bound#housebound#divine disability#disabled joy#disabled artist#disabled poetry#poetry#lord apollo#apollo#original poem#poets on tumblr#poem
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youtube
mini analysis of homura’s house upon yee 🏠🖼️🗡️📚
#i have been bedridden with Chronic Pain and Bad Brain for days and i made this in a frenzy in my bed#madoka magica#revolutionary girl utena#arthur schopenhauer#pmmm#puella magi madoka magica#homura akemi#my video essay#mine
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#the loooong whiskers 🥺#also having them both in my bed and THAT close to eachother is incredibly rare!!! my mom’s heart was bursting 🥰#bedridden and in so much pain but these two are the best medicine#cats#cosy#cute#adorable#lovely#soft#cuddly#cuddles#nap#eepy#fluffy#fuzzy#whiskers#kitty#cozy#warm#snuggles#cuddling#snuggly#snuggling#fluff#winter#hibernating#black cats
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I think my pms was so bad it made me stress skip my period. Speedrunner strat
#I DONT KNOW… AND I AM STILL STRESSED… !! 🫶#i got out of bed today After a nap and i was making spaghetti i was so on that shit#and then my psych np’s assistant texts me back wrt my xanax refill#see in my mind i jump to Im fucking in Trouble. even though im an adult and shes not my mom.#she just wants to talk to me. about how i used 3/4 of a 60 day supply in 30 days#i shouldve said something. i dont know. my previous script with a diff dr was more generous and im used to the freedom of 120 pills.#if a day is bad i can take more. not locked to 1 a day.#thank the entire fucking universe i asked for 60 last time though. i dont know what wouldve happened if i ran out during these last 2 weeks#… i am still worried i will but like. legally it can be refilled. its technically prescribed for 2 times a day.#but xanax cant be given for more than a month. so just bump from 30 to 60 for 2 months.#easy. but also i feel fucking crazy and the anxiety has had me practically bedridden many days. so.#… i asked if i could speak to her soon maybe that wasnt clear enoigh that i want an appointment. before i run out. if possible.#she hasnt answered. that was at like. 4 pm. its the weekend. idk. ill ask monday if i get nothing tomorrow#but its probably ok. ok thanks.#the kat goes meow
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Imagine your f/o taking care of your sick self while you lay in their bed. Hugging their blanket close to your nose for comfort while they take care of your every need.
#I need my f/os to be persistent in cuddling my sick body in bed even though I try to decline in fear of getting them sick#Dude I’m so sick rn where this is one of them moments I wish fictional characters were real.#Gideon grim and Gideon graves specifically#f/o imagines#f/o#f/o community#definitely not imagining this while I’m bedridden and sick
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I haven't eaten in 2 days because I've been bedridden with a horrible fever (not covid, thank God). I'm starving, but something tells me I probably shouldn't give into my cravings and order a 1200 calorie steak burrito the size of my head with double portions of refried beans and tortilla chips with creamy jalapeño sauce. This would ruin me, I know it, but it's all I can think about...
#sick#bedridden#for some reason I thought the phrase was bedladen#but every search brought me to pages about osama bin laden#it wasn't until I searched bed stricken that i found the right words#mexican food#burrito#hungry#fever#possibly the flu
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There was several years of my life where I was on strict doctors orders to be on bedrest and I didn’t have a bed to be in because I was homeless.
Every night I’ve had a bed, ever since I was a young child, I have always said a silent “thank you” to it before I sleep.
I’ve also said that same thank you to overpasses and bridges, park benches, couches, floors, car seats, the half crumbled foundation of that building I could fit under, trees, snow, ice, green grass, tents, my jacket, my backpack, my friend’s lap, hospital beds, waiting rooms, empty church pews, abandoned buildings, behind stores, alleyways, half flooded basements, bus seats, bus shelters, steps of a homeless shelter, steps of a church.
I’ve slept in so many uncomfortable places and still was grateful. And at the same time, I knew I needed a better situation to get true rest.
When I became seriously ill in 2017, I couldn’t rest. Even when I got an apartment in 2019, I was still in an unsafe environment, still having ER visits every other week. It wasn’t until I got a bed and in home care that I stopped having nearly daily life threatening symptoms and could give my body a break.
I still have life threatening symptoms, I still have bad days, but now at least I can rest in between everything. And for that I am so grateful.
#chronically couchbound#disability#disabled#cripplepunk#cripple punk#homeless#unhoused#unsheltered#stories from the streets#stories from the shelter#chronic homelessness#gratitude#grateful#rest#bedridden#bed bound#houseless#hobocrip#hobo crip#hobopunk
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I am having horrible cramps and dying 😭 my back hurts augh
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My heart is full of malice, my insides hatred and resentment. Today, tummy hurty wishes for me to die horribly, and I only have myself to blame
#laying in bed thinking abt him (shen jiu)#reading his wiki page obsessively#while sick and bedridden#I should be thriving!!! i should be playing Minecraft!!! and yet!!!#but we must live for shen jiu (and shen yuan)
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gross eye talk
both my eyes are bleeding and it kind of hurts and its been getting worse every day and like??? do i go see a doctor. or. what do i do here
#mysterion.txt#like. doctors are expensive and i dont want to bother my parents (probably wont take me anyways) but like. idk should i worry#do i need to drink more water?? will that make the problem go away???#idk ive just been lying in bed watching south park and doing my homework all week#minus the two days i was bedridden sick and couldn't do anything but take naps#dude give me a break the year just started!!!!
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this could've been me missing school (but instead i feel like garbage over winter break)
#i say things sometimes#oh my god this week has been horrible#the vyvanse has finally built up in my system and now my body is rejecting it#like cmon. i already knew it didn't work for me#the only eating once a day was bad enough. i don't need to get horribly dizzy and nauseous every time i leave my bed :/#and if you were going to render me bedridden then couldn't you have done it on a week where i'm not going out and about every day????#im mad about this actually. i could've spent any other week feeling horrible and missing school and instead i almost threw up in an#restaurant parking lot#fuck youuuu#AND this entire ordeal has given me many symptoms of pregnancy. i could make so many jokes but NOOOO instead i am having a dysphoria week#i just wanna make fun of my situation and instead i am filled with mental turmoil :(#ughhhh i hate this#vyvanse stop giving me all the negative side affects challenge (impossible because it hates me)#and it's a capsule pill so i can't break it in half to lower my dosage#instead i need to slide the two ends apart and dump the powder out so i can mix half the powder into juice or something
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sometimes im possessed by the evil thought that dress is overplayed and overhyped and then i listen to it and im like oh wtf no it’s genuinely that good. 僕はなぜ風の様に and such.
#it is THAT good i fear it’s a banger#ive been more or less bedridden for the past four days and instead of doing anything good or productive ive been rotting#in bed#listening to my cds :3#blayne
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