#and by then it will be 8:30 which is too late for a nap so i must enter Night Mode

[parkitaco]

the world is determined not to let me take a nap today i can’t continue like this

[skinnywalker]

Professional protector (Aaron Hotchner x nanny! male reader)

It's become a slight problem. Most nights it Hotch was late. Some he wasn't home at all and babysitters were only so reliable.

"You're really using Garica to get a other new babysitter?"

"I'm not trust random teens with my boy."

Emily rolls her eyes and pulls away the file of potential names.

"Can't you just hire a full time?"

Hotch groans.

"Same problem."

"Well it's either a once time issue or a till-jack-is-grown issue so make up you mind."

She's right of course, he needs to just bite the bullet.

After nearly an hour of barely scrapable options Hotch's attention was caught by a face.

Young, clean cut, handsome and with a bakround in child care. He gives Hocth a strange stomach twist, the kind he felt in high-school when he meet Harley. That same at once connection.

"Is he free?"

"Looks like it. Says on his employee web page he is open for full weekdays."

"Send that to me would you?"

Garcia can't help the small grin that crosses her lips.

"At once my lord."

From his nightstand the buzz of that familiar notification sounds him awake.

Clients.

He checks the profile his boss Diane always sends but this one is different than normal. He is used to business men who don't have time for their children but the man is an FBI agent and high in ranks too.

Doesn't look half bad either.

"How much is the pay?

"60 an hour."

He stops dead in his track.

"60? For one child and house sitting?"

"Ahuh. He asked me if that was too low."

"Too low?!"

She smiled at him with a gleam I her eyes.

"He really wanted you specifically."

Hotch keep glancing at his watch. He wasn't late but Hotch was nervous he might be.

"Excuse are you Mr. Hotchner?"

He's pretty in person Hotch thinks. More real. More warm. He's bright-looking but not cocky. Fair featured but no vain. He could reach out his hand and Hotch would near before him to kiss it without even thinking.

"Yes, you must be the nanny."

"Ahuh. Would you like to go over the details of what you need me to do while your away?"

Hotch smiles. He has no clue why but it feels natural.

"Of course."

Hotch leads him through the house explain everything he needs from the house care side of things.

"-and if you can't try to fold the blankets to fit in properly I'd be really thankful."

"Of course. What about your son?"

"Jack spends most of the day at school. He still in k-8 and does sometimes need homework help. He can make his own food but often prefers it made. He has 2-3 hours of screen time weekdays and 4 on weekends. He'll want to call me when I'm out of town which you can also do if you need anything."

He nods. Simple kid.

"He always wants to come along on grocery trips and basically anytime you leave the house."

Hotch hands him the house keys.

"And most importantly he'll ask for want he wants and his bedtime is 8:30."

"Got it. I call you at night if I have questions."

"Daddy?"

The two turn to see a sleepy toddler standing in door way. His spider-man pj's frumbled from napping.

"Hey Jack buddy, this is your new babysitter. He'll be here all day till I come back in the evenings so you don't have to be alone at home."

Jack looks up. Hotch feels the two smiling at eachother. His heart is aching know Jack is already bonding with the nanny. This have been a good idea.

"I have to go home today Jack but I'll see you again tomorrow ok?"

"Ok! Can we play with my Lego pirates."

"We can play whatever you want to Jack."

Hotch loves that smile on Jack. The innocent love. His boy is safe.

"Hotch? We have an emergency."

"What is it J.J.?"

"Ten victims all male in their 20s and the unsub is moving."

"I'll be there in ten mintues."

Hotch's body knows the routine of his morning work runs so well it work on autopilot.

Lastly he kisses Jack's sleeping head and text his new nanny 8 words.

"Flying for work for at least a week."

He'll get what I mean Hotch thinks before he stops himself. Why is he so sure? He doesn't even know the guy and he is trusting him like an old friend already. That's not good but Hotch can't seem to stop himself. He doesn't trust easily but something about him is so safe. So at home at ease. Hotch hates how his walls are just gone the moment he met a pretty man who takes care of his son. Hotch hopes he'll stay.

"He's targeting men who seem successful in love. Men with kids and partners and well paying jobs. Young man living how he wants to live. And he does it through robbery and hold ups. He is choosing targets on the fly."

"Where do we thinking he is making his way to?"

"Maybe his home or his get away car. I don't think he can keep this up for too long and I know he thinks that too."

At the hotel Hotch picks up his nightly call.

"How's your nanny been buddy?"

"I love daddy! He is super smart and he knew all about the history for my test on Tuesday and he makes such good pasta and he read me all the books I have trouble with!"

Hotch feel his stomach twist again. Just like a dad.

"That's great buddy. I'm glad you like him so much."

"He is gonna be my new best friend."

"I'm sure he will sweets now you need to good to bed."

"Ok, Goodnight daddy."

"Sleepwell Buddy. I love you."

"Love you too!"

He's safe. He's for the first time Hotch feels confident in thinking that Jack is really safe and happy. He sleeps better that night then he has in a while.

"Unsub is now in Virginia and he's getting risky. Going straight for our home now. He might even be there at this moment."

"So we came out here just to go home?"

"No, we came out here to know for certain he is home. Let's go."

Jack had asked to come along to the Cafe. He had followed his nanny to the counter and was rewarded with a small pink lemonade.

"Have you ever tried limeade or just lemon?"

He shakes his head no.

"Never liked lime. Too sour."

He chuckles.

"I like a lot of sour things especially ones that have some sweet in them."

"Everyone get on the floor! This is a hold up and if everyone behaves no one will get hurt."

Jack looks up confused and then frighten.

"Nanny?"

"Comere Jack. Everything will be alright."

"We've tracked him to a Cafe he's holding up. Swat is on their way but we don't time on our side."

"How fast can we get there?"

"20."

"20 is not fast enough."

"You, with the blonde kid. Move up here."

His arms wrap around Jack and gently lead them both to the front.

"Give him to me."

"No."

His breathing hitches.

"I'm not letting you near him. You'll have to take me first."

The click of the handriffle echoed in his ears before he felt the the world go black.

When the room came back into focus he realized he was in the ER. His chest was burning. He could feel the dizziness bringing him in and out of blurry awareness.

"Hey, just rest, you're really injured."

"Jack.. what about Jack?"

"He's safe with his father."

A knock at the door interrupts them.

"Hello Doctor is it OK for me to see him?"

"Mr. Hotch? Is that you?"

Hotch leans over the hospital bed brush some hair.

"How are you feeling?"

"I've been worse."

"Worse than shot?"

He giggled even though it hurt.

"Yeah. I'm better knowing Jack is safe."

"He was really scared for you, so was I. You don't know how much it means to me that you put yourself in such danger for my boy."

"I'd do it again."

Hotch felt strange. On one hand he was deeply relieved that he was safe but such a close call had his nerves in a twist. It was like a weight had been added to his psyche. Hotch couldn't let anything happen to him. He felt protective.

"How is he?"

"Exhausted but ok."

"Hotch I know he is just your nanny but you seem pretty worried."

"I can't help but be. He nearly died keeping Jack safe. I don't know what could've happened if I hired someone less bare. This whole time I've felt so.... connected with him. Like he is someone who I can trust."

"Does Agent Aaron Hotchner have a slight crush."

Oh no.

[strawbubbysugar]

Happy birthday Bubby!

Couple more questions!

-Are you able to say everyone’s ages in So(u)l, including the animatronics?

-Does June ever play his guitar and sing in public or at bars or anything or does he only do that at home now?

-Soulmate question, kinda regarding Rush and Morgan’s bond, does that imply that if you don’t have a soulmate due to your previous one passing away, you can get a new bond later even if your future soulmate already exists? Like the string will “wait” kinda until they’re ready? Or was Morgan and Rush’s string there right when Rush woke up?

-What are June, Hello, and Goodbye’s main fidgets/stims?

-Okay this might be weird lol but I’m curious, what are Hello and Goodbye’s favorite little things that June does in his sleep? Does he talk, twitch, unconsciously cling to them like a koala, anything like that?

-What kind of odd jobs does June do on the side?

Thank you!!

i wanna keep it vague, but June is roughly in his mid 20's matt is roughly in his mid-late 30's Marlow is roughly one year younger than June Morgan is two years older than June Hello is a year old (his AI is somewhere around June's age) Goodbye was a year older than June (now the same age as Hello) Rush is around 8 years old (his ai is early 30's) Wibble is around 6 years old (his ai is the same as Rush) Cammie is 4 around years old (her ai is the same as wibble and rush) Octavia is around 2 years old, but was technically never completed (her size makes it much easier to fit a more complex system in her, so her mental age is around 40) The skrittles have the same AI age as toddlers, but theyre a few months old Astro Cadet has been worked on off and on for about six years, and his ai is about the same age. It grows much slower than the WOW branded animatronics

Absolutely no in public things. He's gotten a lot more shy about performing since his band days. He only ever plays for hello/goodbye and piper

Soulmate marks are all about right time, right place. if you arent the version of yourself that would be soulmates with someone, no markings will show up. Morgan was a very different person with their last soulmate, and their life experiences changed who they are. it happens! people change, especially as they get older. its why a lot of people are told not to be upset if they dont get any markings until later on (SPOILERS BELOW) Its why samir and june didnt have any soul marks until samir was goodbye. he wasnt the person that wouldve been soulmates with june yet, he needed to experience and change and grow before that would happen. So did june!

June chews his lip a lot, and sighs. Sometimes he sighs for no reason just because he forgot to breathe. I think his favourite fidget toy would be one of those fidget cubes Hello stims by waving/flapping his arms, or playing with his hands. I think he'd enjoy fidget spinners or rubix cubes! Goodbye stims with squeezing/pressure. He'd enjoy weighted blankets, and I think he'd enjoy stress balls. Ones with thick stuff inside so he can really squeeze down

Hello likes it when June sighs in his sleep, or mumbles. Goodbye thinks its funny when he snores on occasion, and records it to play it back while pretending to nap. (taking inspiration from my roommate bc its hilarious, sometimes june will make the saddest, softest little sigh in his sleep and hello will wake him up like "WERE YOU HAVING A BAD DREAM ARE YOU OKAY" & june will be entirely confused)

June does a lil of everything. people in town come to him for a lot of stuff like yard work, painting houses/fences, cleaning houses. He occasionally comes into bryn's office and helps with anything they might need too, like fixing the chairs, etc. He's known as a jack of all trades around town (which makes him feel nostalgic, since that used to be what he called his childhood best friend)

[knoxic]

Doing a "who's most likely to" thingy but the answers are based on my DR:)

Who's most likely to-

1. Get arrested?

Hotch and Spencer. (let's be honest, they would make amazing unsubs with minds like that)

2. Act on a crush?

Rossi. (he would not hesitate. Derek claims its him but if he actually likes someone he will panic and avoid talking to them)

3. Join the army?

Hotch. (it would be like going to the gym for him yk, wouldn't feel a thing)

4. Win the lottery?

JJ. (buys them for fun and habit cuz her mom used to buy those every once in a while, except she's lucky and has won 5k as a teen and a motorcycle when she joined the BAU (she sold it))

5. Be late to an event?

Derek. (would claim its because Pen took too long to do her makeup but its actually because he does everything last minute and keeps dragging out leaving the house)

6. Lose their phone?

Garcia. (she has at least 3 phones in her bag but somehow always forgets one when we go out, once used my phone to text Derek and he thought I was confessing to him)

7. Always carry a pen?

Rossi. (has one specific pen that he wont share and it's a obligatory part of his outfit)

8. Start a fire?

Emily. (exploded our microwave heating up a coffe, Hotch made her buy a new one and she's now banished from the kitchen, only uses when one of us goes with her)

9. Go surfing?

Derek. (it's a talent, didn't know he could surf until after his 30s)

10. Cheat on a test?

Honestly everyone but Spencer... (Reid would be too scared to cheat but knows the answers anyway. I imagine if it's a work test to see if they're able to work, everyone would know which answers they're supposed to give. Hotch and Rossi have and would absolutely manipulate those exams to be able to work)

11. Cheat on a partner?

Derek. (Before Savannah, wouldn't cheat physically but got bored of his gfs really fast and would think of others while they're together. Eventually made them broke up with him so he wouldn't be the bad guy, canon)

12. Talk in their sleep?

Spencer and Emily (Spencer just rambles inaudible words but Emily is full on weird random phrases, she tries not to sleep in front of the team or else they'll tease her for it, JJ has a notebook with things Em said when they shared rooms)

13. Get a weird tattoo?

Garcia. (look me in the eye and tell me she never got a badly made tattoo before she joined the team, I dare you. Has a butterfly and some weird unidentified object/animal on her back she got while drunk, she does not remember getting it)

14. Adopt a stray dog?

Garcia and JJ. (while I think none of them would adopt any animals because of work, I do see them taking care of the stray dog to later give them to adoption yk)

15. Become bald-headed

Derek and Emily. (Derek for obvious reasons and Emily because she would totally shave her head if someone dared her)

16. Blow all their money on a impulse buy?

Garcia and Hotch. (Garcia is also a obvious one but Hotch would totally spend a tone if he saw something Jack has mentioned before, wouldn't hesitate)

17. Have a million followers on social media?

Garcia and Rossi (I would totally follow her on IG and Twitter, and Rossi because of the books, maybe he even buys followers... marketing reasons)

18. Cancel plans at the last second?

Hotch. (Already did that, has no problems cancelling plans unless it involves Jack)

19. Throw a fit during a game of monopoly?

Spencer and Derek(Already did, refuses to play again, everytime Derek makes him remember he almost cries. Derek is a sore loser)

20. Sleep anywhere anytime?

Emily. (I mentioned before that she tries to not sleep in front of the team and she really does but not always succeed, plane naps are the best for her)

21. Be the first one to die during a zombie apocalypse?

Derek. (thinks he could survive and would try to prove, would die in his 3rd zombie. I would also say Spencer but he would probably be so disgusted by the zombies that he wouldn't even go out to fight them)

22. Be the next USA president?

Hotch and Rossi. (ppl told Hotch he could but he refuses to believe, thinks politicians are dirty and thats an offence to him. Before his retirement Rossi was extremely involved with politics, after he came back and changed his mentality he thinks the same as Hotch (besties))

23. Be a stand-up comedian?

Rossi. (italian jokes, has a notebook with jokes he's heard along the way)

24. Start their own business?

Also Rossi, and Emily (Rossi would open an Italian restaurant that plays jazz all night. Emily would open a bar, totally safe for women. Free tequila shots for the ladies every now and then, calls you a uber and has ppl to accompany you if you need help, banishment rule If guys are being 🤮🤮🤮, bathrooms are safe for trans and nb ppl)

25. Be my best friend forever?

Emily. (the absolutely greatest friend you could have. made her my kids godmother)

26. Become a professional gambler?

Spencer. (do I need to explain?)

27. Have more than 10 piercings?

Garcia and Emily (both have had their ears full pierced but took it all off when they started working, Pen still used some of them when we go out)

28. Leave everything and move to another country?

Hotch. (already did... would be angry at himself if it had to happened after he joined the team)

29. Lock themselves out of the house?

Garcia. (most of the times she's too drunk to even remember where her house is, the few times she remembered she also lost her key during the front yard walk to her door, called morgan and he found her asleep on the floor)

30. Become a nun?

JJ. (grew up in a extremely religious family, wanted to be one before her sister died.)

found the questions on pinterest, just search "most likely to questions"

[vannilac0ke]

How to study like Rory Gilmore

Have you seen Rory Gilmore from "Gilmore Girls"? She's, like, this super smart and book-loving girl, and I'm totally obsessed with her study vibes! If you wanna study like Rory, here's what you can do

Create a Structured Study Schedule

 Rory was known for her disciplined study routine. Set aside specific times each day for studying, and stick to a consistent schedule. This helps create a sense of routine and makes it easier to manage your time effectively. So something like every single day after school you study. Or every other day. Some examples 

      Weekdays:

Morning (8:30 AM - 12:00 PM): Attend classes and take thorough notes during lectures.

Afternoon (1:30 PM - 4:00 PM): Focus on reading assignments, research, and note-taking.

Late Afternoon (4:30 PM - 6:00 PM): Review class notes, clarify doubts, and work on assignments.

      Evenings:

Early Evening (6:30 PM - 7:30 PM): Dinner and casual downtime to relax.

Evening (8:00 PM - 10:00 PM): Engage in focused reading, exploring new books, and taking detailed notes.

Late Evening (10:30 PM - 11:30 PM): Wrap up the day with a review of the day's accomplishments, plan for the next day's tasks, and unwind with light reading or leisure activities.

      Weekends:

Saturday (9:00 AM - 1:00 PM): Use the morning for in-depth reading of complex subjects, working on long-term projects, or catching up on any missed assignments.

Saturday Afternoon (1:30 PM - 3:30 PM): Take a break for a leisurely lunch and engage in a social activity or hobby.

Saturday (4:00 PM - 7:00 PM): Explore different genres of literature, research topics of personal interest, or engage in discussions with friends and family.

Sunday (10:00 AM - 1:00 PM): Attend a study group or engage in academic discussions with peers to exchange ideas and perspectives.

Sunday Afternoon (1:30 PM - 4:30 PM): Visit a library or bookstore to discover new books, gather resources, and continue reading.

Sunday Evening (5:00 PM - 7:00 PM): Reflect on the past week's progress, review notes, and plan for the upcoming week.

Remember, you should tailor your own study routine to your personal preferences and what's the most comfortable for you.

Minimize distractions:

Find a quiet and clean space where you can concentrate on your work without interruptions. OK, first things first, let's tackle that phone situation. Put it on silent mode, flip it face down, or even, like, put it in another room. Trust me, Instagram can wait. After that, find a spot that's cozy but not too comfy. You wanna be focused, not napping. Clear your desk or table of anything that's not study-related so you won't hyper- fixate on those things. Try playing music, but make sure it's not, like, super distracting. And if you catch yourself dancing, maybe it's time for a new playlist. Also Have some snacks and water ready, so you don't have to get up every five minutes. But, stay away from messy stuff that'll ruin your notes. Make sure to break it up. Set a timer for your desired amount of time  of focused study Then take a short break and get back to it. Get cute and organized stationary

Organized Stationary

Rory's organized approach to her studies is evident in her well-kept notebooks and study materials. Use binders, folders, or digital tools to keep your study materials organized and easily accessible. Having cute stationary ask increases your likelihood to study since it aesthetically pleasing to look at and enhances creativity. You can also add personalization which is always fun.You cant get cute stationary at stores like MUJI, Paper Source, Stationary Pal, Society6, Kikki.K and from retail stores like Aliexpress, Etsy and Temu.  And Finally Review Regularly.  Periodically review your notes and materials to reinforce your understanding. This spaced repetition technique can enhance your long-term retention of information.

[tomwambsmilk]

Choose Your Own Succession Adventure: Episode 2

The nicest bathrooms will be on the executive floor, but those are probably too nice. There's a much higher chance of being noticed if you go all the way up there just to use the bathroom. But two floors below? Those are probably just as nice, and less conspicuous.

You want to take a nice long shit, so you hunt around a little to find the bathroom with the least foot traffic. After a couple minutes, you stumble across a tiny two-stall bathroom tucked away down a hallway. It's got faux-marble countertops and a little vase of flowers, and those high-speed hand dryers that make the skin on your hands ripple. Perfect.

You settle in and pull out your phone to scroll through Twitter, which is currently dominated by tweets about Logan. You start to scroll and -

You hear the door open, and you sigh a little. All you wanted was some damn privacy. And then you hear the lock on the bathroom door - one you didn't even notice coming in - click shut.

Uh oh.

You freeze. A person starts pacing around the bathroom. A man? You can see Oxfords and dress pants under the bottom of the stall door. He doesn't go into the other stall, nor does he stop at the urinal, just keeps pacing back and forth and making bizarre noises. He's muttering to himself, you realize.

"Fucking... hulk shit. Hulk it up. Yeah." At least, that's what you think you hear. Is he... hyping himself up?

He stops pacing and stands in front of the sink without turning on the water. Just... stands there. Staring into the mirror, presumably.

You watch the numbers on your phone clock change. 8:59. 9:00. 9:01.

Just when you're considering flushing the toilet so he knows someone else is in here, his phone rings.

"Hey, yeah, thanks, man. Yeah, it's going great. Fucking fantastic. I- yeah, just had a call with the bank, which went, uh, super well. Fucking crushed it," he says, in a deeply unconvincing tone of voice. "And I'm just about to head into the all-hands senior staff, which is like 30, 40 people? But it'll be good, we're off to a strong start. Crushing this shit. Fucking... interim CEO who, right? Might as well just crown me now."

As soon as he says interim CEO you realize where you've heard the voice before - a memory comes rushing back of an episode of the Joe Rogan podcast your shitty roommate insists on listening to at full volume in the kitchen.

That's Kendall Roy.

You barely hear him make plans to meet up with the voice on the other end of the phone after the staff meeting. He hangs up the phone, makes what sounds suspiciously like gorilla noises into the mirror, and then leaves the bathroom.

As you wash your hands, a thought pops into your head. You really should head down to your desk, because you're now technically late. But.... that senior staff meeting sounds big. 30, 40 people... what are the odds anyone's going to question the presence of little old you? And when are you going to get an opportunity for this kind of tea again.

At the same time, though.... it sounds like everyone's going to be out of their offices for at least an hour. If anyone catches you in an office you shouldn't be, you can always claim to be lost. It is your first day, right?

Or. Let's be real. You are pretty tired. It sounds like no one will be around to notice if you find a corner to nap in.

Then again, if someone does catch you... is it worth the risk of being fired?

[cassiaallen]

The Jily Wedding post, which includes how I imagine their wedding has looked and what happened to them (and the rest of the marauders) afterwards.

Enjoy!

Jily Wedding

Proposal 31.03.1979

Wedding 31.08.1979

(I tried to attach pictures of the venue, engagement and wedding rings, bridal/maid of honour/bridesmaids dresses, Lily’s hair, the reception, groom/groomsmen/best man’s tuxedos, but tumblr kept messing it up)

After the wedding

-Dorothy & Robert Evans die in a car crash two days later (on their way home) 02.09.1979

-burial in Little Whinging 07.09.1979

-Petunia and Lily each inherit half of the house and money, but Lily leaves it all to Petunia as she (Lily) lives in the Wizarding World

-"honeymoon" late October

-31.10.1979 Sirius organises a Halloween party for the Order (the making of HP+NL)

-Lily finds out she’s pregnant a few days before Christmas

-she tells James by gifting him a onesie that says "I love Daddy"

-last big mission for the Order 08.05.1980

-Voldemort shows up (because Peter started leaking information), Order + Voldemort duel (third defy) [it was meant to be a harmless mission + he finds out Lily is pregnant, making the Potters potential Prophecy subjects]

-15.05.1980 Prophecy

-the Potters as well as the Longbottoms go into hiding

-Harry James Potter is born 31.07.1980

-Death Eater meeting in August informs Voldemort of the birth of the two boys

-by the end of the month he decides Harry is The One™️

-Snape pledge August 1980

-Euphemia + Fleamont visit Jily in September 1980 and meet Harry for the first and only time

-they also give them a baby book

-Jily find out V officially targets their son in October 1980

-E&F become ill with Dragon Pox

-because of his generally bad health, F dies 28.10.1980 and E dies 30.10.1980 largely because of heartbreak

-funeral 01.11.1980 (the last time Jily leave the house/they have the whole Order to protect them for this - the reason this is the last time is because they are marked people and the Order has other things to do and can’t always have everyone take care of them)

-Fidelius Charm (with Sirius as Secret Keeper)

-family bliss

-horrible vase 🏺 25.12.1980 (they adopt a kitten [Crookshanks])

-the war worsens

-little excursions

-Prewett brothers' death May 1981

-Dumbledore confiscates the Cloak

-Harry’s first birthday 31.07.1981

-McKinnon death 05.08.1981

-Peter visit 08.08.1981

-Letter to Sirius 12.08.1981

-early October 1981 Sirius is on an Order mission with the Bones’ during which they die and Sirius barely survives

-Sirius decides that him being SC is too risky, so he, James, and Lily decide to give the role to Peter

-switch happens 26.10.1981

-Peter thinks about the Betrayal for 3 days

-Peter tells Voldemort about the Potters' whereabouts 29.10.1981

-Voldemort decides to attack them on Halloween because symbolism

-31.10.1981 🖤💔

-Peter-Sirius confrontation 01.11.1981

-Jily funeral 04.11.1981

31.10.1981

-Harry wakes up around 7

-James gets up, changes Harry, puts him in a pumpkin costume and makes breakfast with him for Lily

-they have breakfast at 8:30

-Jily put up a few Halloween decorations

-Sirius comes by for lunch, telling them about the Order in general and Remus' mission in particular

-he leaves in the early afternoon after some Halloween fun and taking a picture of the Potters

-James puts Harry down for a nap

-Lily writes in her diary

-Jily sit on the sofa and talk about the war and other things (including how much they love each other)

-Lily gets Harry, takes him downstairs and they have family play time

-Harry gets fussy, so he and Lily snuggle while James makes dinner

-they have dinner and Harry spits up on his onesie, so Lily cleans him up and already puts his blue pyjamas on

-Jily finish dinner, James goes to the living room with Harry and plays with him for a bit while Lily cleans up (she leaves her wand in the kitchen)

-puffs of coloured smoke

-Lily watches them for a few seconds through the door which is slightly open

-she fully opens the door ("I think I’ll put Harry to bed, James.")

-James kisses Harry on the head and Lily on the lips

-stretching, yawning, wand on sofa

-door bursts open, J runs into the hall ("Lily, take Harry and go! […]")

-V kills J

-Lily screams, V laughs again and goes upstairs

-Lily places as much furniture as possible in front of the door and picks Harry up to give him one final kiss

-V opens door and Lily drops him into the crib ("Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry! […]")

-V kills Lily

-Harry stands up, clutching the bars of his crib

-attempted Harry murder and rebounding curse

-destroyed house and screaming Harry

-Dumbledore finds out about the broken Fidelius Charm because his wand shoots bright sparks and makes a noise

-Dumbledore sends Hagrid to the Potters

-Hagrid encounters Sirius who gives him his motorbike

-D gives H a portkey to his office, so they could talk about what should happen

-D explains to H that Harry needs to stay with Petunia + Vernon

-Harry stays in Hogwarts overnight, mainly to check if he’s ok

01.11.1981

-D moves Jily's bodies and provisionally seals the Potter Cottage

-Harry stays in D's office with Hagrid + occasionally Madam Pomfrey who checks on him

-McGonagall watches the Dursleys in her animagus form

-D takes care of things all day (Potter and school business) and tells Hagrid to meet him at the Dursleys at ca. 22:00

-when the time comes, Hagrid isn’t sure how to travel, so he takes Harry, wraps him in the blanket and takes the portkey which already took him to D's office the previous day

-he arrives at the Potter Cottage, finds the motorcycle and rides it to the Dursleys

[canon events]

Simultaneously (Sirius POV)

-after Hagrid leaves, he sits down on the stairs and thinks

-he realises Peter’s betrayal and, filled with rage, hatred and grief, decides to go after him

-Sirius finds Peter in a muggle street [S remembers a piece of information about P that leads him there] and starts a fight (verbally) that starts to draw a crowd

-P pretends to be sorry, while secretly taking his wand out

-P loudly accuses Sirius of betraying Jily, casts the Blasting Curse, cuts his finger off, transforms into a rat, and disappears into the sewers

-Sirius starts laughing hysterically in sheer desperation

-aurors appear, Sirius is captured and imprisoned

[udon-udon]

anyway, a big recap of my victoria bc trip

got up at 6:50 am ish and then headed out at 7:20 took the train and bus to the ferry terminal and then headed to victoria yay, lined up for a a breakfast meal for the ~experience~ and that pretty much took up most of the time. Arrived and took the bus to the royal bc museum, almost missed my bus due to it being full but someone pointed to the huge line to go take the other bus, got lucky there.

The Royal BC Museum was cool, though there wasn't much to it cause there were no feature exhibit at that time and one part of the museum was under reno, but it was still fun nonetheless!! I didn't realize how dark it was so honestly I was a lil spooked at times esp cause I was alone haha. Since it was a very nice day I went down to the Fisherman's Wharf cause I wouldn't have time on saturday and i heard the weather wasn't gonna be good on sunday. Most of the shops were closed for the season LMAOO so there wasn't much to see, but thankfully there was 1 fish n chips shop open and i bought some yum yum, it was very filling. Walked back to downtown and went through the Miniature World museum and it was super cute!!! It was also a lil spoopy for parts of it cause there were portions of it where it was dark and there weren't many people going through it.

Headed to the airbnb around 5 ish, and then chilled for a bit. Was wanting to order dinner but the place I wanted to order to was too busy at that time to take in takeout orders so i had to schedule it at 8 sobs but thats okay cause i was still full from the fish n chips, so i just chilled and tried to nap. The dinner was kinda mid ngl, wish i got the lasagna but i was like "but i can get lasagna anywhere else" it was okay but still LOL. also splurged and bought a cheesecake as well, that was pretty good though. couldn't finish it so i saved half of it for tomorrow's dinner.

The next day was con day!! I was supposed to go to a brunch place but i slept in a little and then when i got there, the line was pretty long and i didnt want to wait so im like eh okay nvm ima just go back home and eat the breadsticks i didn't eat yesterday LOL as well as the creme brulee given by the airbnb host they're so nice. And then I made my way to the con and omg it was a lot of walking lol. Got in and hung around mainly in the artist alley!! I was supposed to go watch the cosplay contest but i lost track of time and missed it LMAO OOPS. I spent waaay more than I thought I would, but very happy with my purchases and wish i bought more haha but my backpack literally would have no room for it. I spent the remaining time at my friends table til like 6:30 and made a new friend that was tabling with her, she was super kind and fun

Got home and picked up dinner on the way, ordered a mixed kebab meal set and it was so good and the portion was huge, very worth it and very delicious. Spent the rest of the night eating and showering and watching youtube and packed a little bit before leaving tomorrow.

Woke up the next day, final day, it was damn pouring in the morning sadly, so I just stayed in the airbnb until 10:50 and then made my way to explore the Chinatown (which I found out is the second oldest Chinatown in North America???? damn). Went to the little Chinatown museum and saw some cool stuff and then walked around the area and the shops nearby. Went to Boardwalk Burgers and chilled until it was time to catch the bus to the ferry.

I arrived hella early cause if I didn't take the bus I took, i would have been late to my ferry;;; BUT MY FERRY GOT DELAYED. So I just spent a lot of time sitting at the waiting area playing my 3DS LOL Made some progress in AA5 again finally, i haven't played it in sooo long ( i really should finish it, as well as spirit of justice, and i still have the great chronicles to play;;) Got on the ferry and played some more AA5 and holy cow the line for the cafeteria was so long im glad i didn't decide to eat dinner there cause I was originally gonna but thank god i didnt. Napped a lil before arriving at the bay aaaand then went home :)

Overall, very nice trip!! Even though I was alone, I had a blast exploring and seeing things and got to take my time to explore shops and whatever I wanted. I had no budget planned going into this and I probably should have cause I spent... quite a lot, but oop.

[myf00djournal]

The only photo I have from today 😂

Slept in until 8:30 who am I?! Also didn’t wear my watch today to give myself a break (rest day 😮‍💨)

Was HUNGRY - scrambled two eggs with zaatar, English muffin, and Nutrigrain cereal 🥣

We went out for sushi 🍣

Had a scoop of Hokey Pokey ice cream in a waffle cone

Came home and napped so hard under the ac

Now we made homemade Lebanese bread pizza 🍕 and there is garlic bread too of course. I put chicken on mine to bring up my protein. Trying to be mindful but not too much so.

You can only log the best you can when you eat out so give it take its spot on 2500 which is great. Heaps of carbs that will hopefully spur me through parkrun tomorrow morning!

Have also logged a protein smoothie but will see how I feel after dinner

✌🏽

Edit: I just realized I had no coffee today WHYYYY is it too late to go back??? Will make up for it tomorrow 🤣

[rothjuje]

Today broke me. My spicy one screamed for 90 minutes straight this morning. At that point we still had not unpacked ONE box (Tuesday leg drama and urgent care, Wednesday leg drama and urgent care, Thursday leg drama and ER). My absence this week has been dysregulating for the kids, as well as strangers coming and going.

Everything has been just running around in circles. Hired someone to paint. He painted part of the ceiling by accident and now the whole ceiling needs to be painted. He also spilled paint in several places, but oddly not the carpet that’s going to be ripped out anyway. Sigh. On top of that I don’t even like the paint color and he did a crappy job in general so I’m just going to buy a new color and do it myself. In all my spare time. Ha. I’d never worry about paint at a time like this, but we need the living room painted to get the tv up and I need Cocomelon for my sanity.

We still don’t have lights upstairs (lamp ended up behind couch in playroom, could move couch but it’s broken and lamp will not survive twin toddlers).

Can’t unpack kitchen because there aren’t cabinet locks. Decide on baby gates instead of cabinet locks. Order them. They’re late. They get here. They don’t fit. We still don’t have pots or pans. I haven’t had a home cooked meal in 6 weeks (I’ve been surviving off of cereal and bagels) and it just makes me so sad. Baking bread was how I kept my sanity.

Basically, to unpack, you need to take things out of boxes and put them somewhere that two two year olds can’t reach. Which is simply not possible when they’re awake, because when they’re awake they’re glued to me.

So. Anyway. I regretted every decision I had ever made to get me to this point, had a good cry, and then a good scream. Then Jess the neighbor finally got to come back over (48 hours fever and vomit free) and that restored some of my sanity.

Then neither twin had a 6 pm disaster nap and they were actually in bed before 9 pm. HALLELUJAH. Yes, it’s been a thing here. I’ll look over and one of the twins will just be passed out on the floor or on the couch. Transitioning out of naps is such a frustrating time in general. Sigh.

Justin and I managed to unpack about 8 boxes each after the kids went down. You can now walk in our room, the dining room, and the playroom. There are 9 boxes left in our room, 11 in the dining room, 7 in the girls’ room, 3 in George’s room, and too many to count in the basement.

But. Progress. Actual forward motion. Thank Gd.

Okay. Leg. Sat in ER most of yesterday (I drove to one of the good hospitals and I still sat forever, and then they had 5 patients in these giant rooms with little dividers). Texas is so different. You wait for 30-60 minutes and then get your own spacious room. Honestly, Texas has a lot going for it. It’s very functional down there. I miss it, a lot.

Anyway. Rash is still spreading, but that’s normal up to 5 days into antibiotics they say (which I wish urgent care would have said, I would like my time and money back from yesterday please). So. They said the purple is fine, the blisters are fine, that if it’s necrotizing it will be immensely painful and if I feel immense pain come back.

Hoping that things will continue on the up and up. Dining room looks cute, our room more spacious than we thought, playroom very cute. In-laws come tomorrow and I am very very thankful for the extra hands. I miss seeing familiar faces and I’m excited for the normalcy of a visit.

[scienceoftheidiot]

I was tagged to reply to those by @magipies thank you 🥰

3 ships : Royai (FMA) which I'm currently obsessing over in a seriously over the top way (people here can confirm but no one can confirm better than @qs63 I AM NOT SORRY), I would say Karedevil (DD) but I'm not invested in any part of the fandom anymore so eh and that would be Kirsten erasure so double eh, AND I ship anyone with Edmund (Ripper Street) now because that man needs. Love. A hug. Whatever. (Anyone but the redhead in S4 I mean this is obvious)(but Jackson counts. Just give the man some love please)(I think I like Mimimund the most considering the fics I wrote but 🤐)(just because I like the idea that they could find closure together after all that happened, but.... That's a very sad ship)

Last song : Requiem for a Dying Song by Flogging Molly, because.... Well, lyrics. Other hit is Oliver Boy (All of our Boys) by the same band. Same theme. I'm into a Flogging Molly time, which is not surprising considering late January is when I saw them live four years ago and this tends to make me listen to the bands I see. Damn that was long ago and damn that was a great time.

Last movie : I think... I think we rewatched Overlord ? Or... I think it was a horror movie. Okay either Overlord or 30 days of night (might not be the real title I translated word for word from French because I'm lazy)(there's Josh Hartnet in this one)(but Overlord is better)

Currently watching : husband has decided we would rewatch Obi Wan so we're rewatching Obi Wan and it's still not good but it's also not bad so.

Currently consuming : leftover pasta with olive oil. And raw carrots. Basically anything that's in the fridge cause I'm lazy. Maybe I'll eat some of the chili rice I made for tomorrow too.

As for media I'm reading the FMA manga, I'm at vol. 8 of the Perfect Edition, and it's great.

Currently craving : vol 9. And chocolate. Always craving chocolate. And chili rice too so I guess I'll just eat the chili rice. Cause I have no chocolate. AND A FUCKING NAP

Tagging : @heirsoflilith @residentdormouse @littleragondin and my brain is fried so open tag and I'll go nap bye

[johnsbleu]

Hold My Hand: John Wick x Reader Chapter 133

warnings: none, just a little nsfw (barely) convo at the end hmh masterlist

Life with a newborn hasn’t been completely life changing, but your routine is definitely a bit different now. Every morning Ronan wakes up between 6 and 6:30, and usually John is the one to get her since he’s already up. Once you’ve gotten more rest and you’ve healed more, you know that you’ll be getting up earlier to get her for her first feeding.

Since Ronan wakes up for her first feeding around 6, she usually goes down for her first nap at 8, which is perfect because it gives you and John time to get ready for the day yourselves. You’ll shower quickly, get dressed, eat some breakfast, and John makes a pot of coffee for the two of you for the day. Around 9, Ronan wakes up for another feeding, and John always brings her to wherever you are so the two of you can watch her eat and spend time together as a family before he needs to run some errands if he needs to that day.

Even though it’s only been a little over a week, the two of you already have a whole system down. It’s been helping a lot with your baby blues as well to have a routine.

Last night wasn’t exactly a walk in the park, but it wasn’t the most difficult night you’ll ever have or even have had. Ronan usually only wakes up about twice in the night to feed, but last night, she woke up about four times. John was there to help though, so that was nice.

Today is Ronan’s first appointment since she’s been born, and to say that you and John are nervous is an understatement. You’re not entirely sure why you’re so nervous since Ronan was healthy and happy at the hospital, and since she’s been home, she’s been just as good. The only downside is that she isn’t latching once again, so you’ve decided to just bottle feed from now on since she doesn’t seem to want to breastfeed. You’re a little hurt by it, which contributed a lot to your baby blues but you know that what matters most is that she’s getting food.

It’s a little after 8, which means Ronan is down for her nap and she won’t be up for about an hour, so you and John are already getting yourselves ready for the day. You’ve invited everyone over for a barbecue so they can finally meet Ronan, and you’re so excited to be able to show off the newest member of your family!

“So,” John looks up from the baby monitor at you as you inhale your breakfast, “Whoa, baby, slow down.”

“I’m sorry,” you laugh, covering your mouth with your hand, “I’m like…ravenous lately.”

John walks over to you at the table and sits down, “You did a lot of work, and your body has to recover from it. How are you feeling otherwise?”

“Pretty good. The pain is pretty much gone, which I was a little shocked about. I mean, it’s been a little over a week, but my doctor said it was normal, I guess. Emotionally I feel so much better too.” you say, and John smiles wide, then he watches as you put your hands on your boobs, “My breasts are a little tender, but what little milk I had is drying up. I’m still so bummed about not being able to breastfeed, but hopefully I can work with a lactation nurse next pregnancy and I’ll be able to do that.”

“You’re an amazing mother.” he says, pressing a kiss to the back of your hand, “Watching you this past week has made my heart grow twenty times bigger.”

You nod as you lean over to kiss John, “Mine too. Seeing you in the night with Ronan on your chest and watching you soothe her has been the highlight, no doubt. I just love you so much. I didn’t think I could love you any more than I do--which is a whole lot, by the way--but I have so much fucking love for you and for how you’re responding to our new roles.”

John shrugs as his cheeks turn a little red, “They’re great roles.”

“They really are.” you nod, getting up from your chair to sit in John’s lap. You wrap your arms around John’s neck to hug him tight, and the two of you bask in the silence for a moment before you hear Ronan whimpering on the the baby monitor. “That was 3 minutes. Definitely the record.”

John chuckles as you get off his lap, “I am determined to hold you for five uninterrupted minutes.”

“Well,” you laugh quietly, “Maybe in 18 years.”

Leaving the kitchen, you head up to your room to check on Ronan. She’s crying a little when you walk into your room but as soon as you say hello to her, she stops and looks around.

“Hi, bug.” you whisper as you bend over to look at her in the bassinet, then you get her unswaddled, her arms shooting above her head as she stretches, “Are you gettin’ hungry? Momma will feed you.”

Ronan lets out one big cry and begins to kick her legs as she grows more and more fussy. John rounds the corner with a bottle in his hand, and he waits until you’re comfortable on the bed to hand it to you. He watches you as you prop Ronan up in your arms to feed her, then he crawls into bed to watch as she drinks her bottle.

“She looks just like you, John.” you whisper, staring into Ronan’s brown eyes.

John presses a kiss to Ronan’s forehead, then he sits back up to kiss your cheek, “I think she looks like you sometimes.”

“Oh, yeah? When she’s crying?” you joke, and John starts to laugh.

“No, she’s beautiful just like her momma.” John whispers as he rubs his thumb against her forehead. “And she has my entire heart just like her momma.”

You smile as you look over at John, “I love you, Wick.”

“I love you.” he says as his gaze falls to your lips, and he leans over to give you another kiss with a little more warmth.

__

Thankfully you got to your appointment in enough time to fill out all of your paperwork, and Ronan has been a little angel this whole time. She’s still sleeping, but she’s in John’s arms instead. He absolutely loves to hold her, and you don’t blame him one bit.

John sits down in the chair next to you and bounces Ronan a little, “Hey, baby girl.”

“You’ll need to take her clothes off.” you say, and John looks over at you, “They’ll have to weigh her and measure her, so we’ll just take off her clothes and wrap her in a blanket. It’ll only take a few minutes.”

“Okay,” John nods, “I just don’t want her to be too cold.”

“She’s going to be fine, John.” you chuckle as he stands up and puts Ronan on the bed so he can pull off her onesie. He wraps a blanket around her, then he sits down next to you again as the door opens.

A middle aged woman with salt and pepper hair and pale skin steps in, and when she smiles, she has the most beautiful teeth you’ve ever seen. She looks at you and John, then she stretches out her arm to shake your hand, “Hi, I’m Amy. I’m your nurse, and I’ll be handling this first half of the exam.”

“I’m Y/N, this is my husband, John. And this little one is Ronan.” you smile, then you smile at John as he looks down at Ronan in his arms.

Amy bends down a little to get a look at Ronan, then she puts her hand over her heart as she stands back up, “Oh, she’s precious. Congratulations.”

“Thank you.” you smile, then you look over at John to see him beaming with pride.

“So, we’re just going to do some checkups today. Just measuring her height and weight, and don’t be alarmed if she’s lost weight since birth. That usually happens in the first week, but she’ll start gaining it back by her two week checkup.” she says, then she gestures for John to lay Ronan on the bed.

The two of you watch closely as she measures Ronan from top to bottom, then she uses the tape measure to determine the circumference of Ronan’s head. Amy smiles at Ronan and talks to her as she continues looking her over, and John is standing right next to her the whole time.

“She is a wiggly baby.” Amy laughs as she tries to listen to Ronan’s heart, then she gives John a nod to let him know he can hold her again. She writes everything down on the chart, then she smiles as she looks over at you and John, “So, she’s lost a little weight, and like I said it’s totally normal. She’s a pretty chunky baby, and she hasn’t lost enough weight to cause us any alarm. If she had, I would definitely suggest feeding her a bigger bottle and more often, but she hasn’t. Doctor Marlene will be in shortly to finish up the rest of the exam, so with that, I’ll be going unless you two have any questions.”

You look at John and shrug, then you smile as you look at Amy, “No, I think we’re good. Thank you so much.”

“Have a great day.”

Only a few minutes pass before the door opens again, and your doctor steps in wearing a bright colored top under her lab coat which is covered in cats and dogs. She’s a new doctor that you haven’t seen yet, but Doctor Mendez recommended her.

“Hello, hello.” she smiles, reaching out for John’s hand to shake, “Doctor Marlene.”

“John.” he nods, then he bounces Ronan a little, “This is Ronan.”

“Ronan, what a beautiful name for such a beautiful little girl.” Doctor Marlene smiles, then she looks over at you, “And you must be mom.”

You smile as you reach out to shake her hand, “I’m Y/N.”

Doctor Marlene looks over at Ronan as John places her on the bed, and she smiles when John keeps his hand on her stomach like he’s afraid she’s going to roll off and hurt herself.

“So, you’ve obviously met Nurse Amy, she’s great with kiddos. She took baby’s measurements, and from the looks of it, Ronan is just where she should be at this point. I see she’s lost a little weight, which is normal, I’m sure Amy reassured you of that a few times.” she says, leaning back against the counter, “Today, I’m going to be checking her collarbone…”

“Her collarbone?” John asks, and you look over at him as his deep voice fills the small room. “Why her collarbone?”

Doctor Marlene smiles at John’s curiosity and nods as she takes a deep breath, “Well, sometimes babies fracture their clavicle when they’re squeezing through the birth canal. It mends in a few weeks, you just need to be extra careful of course.”

John nods his head, then he looks down at Ronan, already growing worried about Ronan and her fragile little collarbone. The doctor looks over at you and smiles, then she moves to check Ronan before John bursts into tears. She feels along Ronan’s neckline, then she smiles and nods.

“She’s good, Mr. Wick. You can relax.” Doctor Marlene can tell that John is growing more and more nervous, so she decides to finish the rest of the exam. She palms around Ronan’s head to feel it, then she lays Ronan back down so she can check her hips, her reflexes, her pulse, and a few other things. “You can hold her now, Mr. Wick.”

“Please, you can call me John.” he says, then he sits down next to you as he wraps Ronan back up.

Doctor Marlene nods her head, then she’s silent for a moment as she types down the notes on her laptop. She takes a deep breath and looks over at you, “She’s in great health, and she’s doing really well. Are you breastfeeding?”

“I’m not. I was at the hospital and for a day or so after we got home, but she stopped latching, and my milk has dried up. Guess there wasn’t much in there.” you say, laughing a little to hide your hurt, “I called Doctor Mendez and she told me to switch to bottle feeding full time.”

“Nothing wrong with that. As long as she’s getting fed!” she smiles at you and nods, “How often does she feed?”

“About 7 or 8 times a day, every two or so hours.” you look at John, and he nods his head, agreeing with you. “She sleeps really well through the night so far, and we only have to get up once to feed and change her.”

“And you change her every time she gets fed?”

You nod, “Yup, and any time in between. It’s like we never stop changing her diaper, I’ve never seen so many diapers in my life.”

Doctor Marlene laughs as she taps away on her keyboard, then she keeps her gaze set on her laptop as she asks more questions, “And sleeping? You said she’s good?”

“Yeah, she sleeps really well at night.” John says, bouncing Ronan. “And she sleeps really well during the day. Always on her back too.”

“Very good, dad.” she smiles, letting out a small laugh, “So, Ronan won’t need any shots until she comes in for her two month checkup, if that’s something you want to do.”

You and John both nod in unison, “Absolutely.”

“Okay,” she nods, then she stands up, “Mr. and Mrs. Wick, you have a beautiful, healthy little girl, and I can’t wait to go on this journey with you and watch her grow!”

“Thank you so much.” John reaches for her hand and shakes it. He looks down at Ronan and smiles wide, “You did so good, bug! Didn’t she, momma?”

You nod as you look up at John, “Mhm.”

“Are you okay?”

You shake your head and shrug, “I just feel so sad that she’s a week old already.”

John nods his head as he puts Ronan in her car seat, then he looks over at you and smiles, “Are you ready to show off your baby, Mrs. Wick?”

“Yeah,” you nod, then you smile at John when he cups your face, “I can’t wait.”

__

It’s mid-afternoon, which means Ronan has just had her afternoon feeding and she’s now down for her nap. You had planned everything out so that while she’s sleeping, everyone will be getting here, and they can hang out and relax for a little bit before she wakes up. Hopefully she won’t be too fussy since this is the first time she’s going to be around more people.

John is helping you get the patio cleaned off since the wind was a little bit crazy this morning and it blew leaves all over the place. He pulled the grill from the backyard to the patio, and he even ran to the store to get a few things that he had forgotten to grab.

He sits down on the loveseat, then he pats it and looks at you, “Come here.”

You set the broom aside and walk over to sit next to John, and he carefully moves your hair off your shoulder to look at you before the two of you look around the yard. John presses a kiss to the top of your head, then he lets out a content sigh.

“I can’t wait for everyone to meet Ronan.” he says, wrapping his arm around your shoulder, “I can’t wait for Harper and Benji to meet her.”

You laugh quietly, “Harper will love her, Benji probably won’t really care. He thinks you’re much cooler than a baby. Amanda said he still talks about when we went to the roller rink.”

John hugs you tighter to his side, then he exhales contently, “I should probably get the food ready. You’re probably getting hungry, huh?”

“Yeah, but I’m fine to just snack on stuff until people are ready to eat.” you say, then you look up to see Aurelio pulling into the driveway. “Why don’t you go greet everyone? I’ll just make myself a salad or something.”

John claps his hands together as he gets off the loveseat to greet Aurelio and his family, and you can’t help but smile when you realize just how excited John is. You hear John greeting everyone as you walk back inside, and you stop by the monitor to see Ronan wiggling around in her bed.

“Oh, you little stinker.” you whisper, making your way up to her room. You get Ronan from her bed and change her diaper since she’s bombed it already, then you change her into a different outfit that’s a little thinner since it’s so warm outside today. “Hi, bug. How are you doing?”

Ronan coos a little, then she wiggles around on the changing table. Taking her back into your arms, you sit down in the rocking chair to see if she’ll maybe go back to sleep for at least another 30 minutes.

“So,” you exhale, rocking back and forth, “How am I doing so far? Am I good momma? Sorry I was having a rough go of it at the start there. Postpartum is no joke.”

Ronan yawns silently as she stretches her arms above her head, then she grunts a little as she moves around.

You press a soft kiss to her head and inhale her new baby scent, “Your daddy has been doing so much of the work lately, I feel like maybe you and I aren’t having enough time to bond. I try to get up and help you in the night, but daddy stops me.”

You know John is just trying his best to help you, but sometimes it feels like Ronan is his kid and not yours. Anytime you wake up in the night to help with her, John immediately tells you to go back to bed. You know that you should be grateful for it--and you are!--but sometimes you want to spend those early hours in the morning holding and feeding your baby. It’s obvious that it’s just his way of helping you since you really were having a hard time those first few days.

There’s a soft knock at the door, and you look up to see John poking his head in, “Hi, girls.”

You smile, holding Ronan’s hand up so she can wave, “Hi, daddy.”

John walks over and kneels down in front of the two of you, “Can’t sleep?”

“She had a dirty diaper. I’m hoping she’ll go down for a bit longer, but I don’t think we’re going to have much luck.”

“Well, that’s okay,” John says, standing back up, “Everyone’s starting to get here, so…”

John places his hands in front of you as you get up from the chair, then he smiles when you look at him. You grab Ronan’s blanket and pacifier, and you put it in her mouth and smile when you see her sucking on it.

“I think she’s hungry again.” you whisper as you walk out of the room, “She’s probably wondering why no food is coming out of that.”

“I can make her another bottle.” John says, placing one hand on your lower back and the other around you to help hold Ronan.

You look out the window as you walk down the stairs, and you see Aurelio and his family are all sitting around the table. You look out across the yard to see Finn, Tess, and Jimmy making their way over.

“Yeah, that would be great.” you smile, looking up at John as he leans down to kiss you. You head outside to greet everyone, and Amanda gasps when she sees the tiny baby in your arms. “Hi, everyone.”

“Oh, my gosh,” she stands up and walks over to get a good look at Ronan, “She is so beautiful. Look at her hair! Oh, my gosh, and her brown eyes!”

Aurelio laughs, “No denying she’s John’s.”

You laugh as you sit down in the loveseat, “Oh, I know. The moment she was born, she was the spitting image of John. Thankfully he’s cute!”

Amanda keeps a tight grip on Harper since she’s trying to get a look at Ronan, and she sits down on the chair across from you, “How are you feeling?”

“If we’re being honest, I feel so damn tired and so hungry. John and I are just so in love with Ronan, we kinda forget about ourselves. We’ll sit down to talk about what we want for dinner, then we fall asleep and don’t wake up until it’s the middle of the night.” you say, looking over as John comes out with Ronan’s bottle. You know he’ll be dying to feed her, so you hand her off to him so he can do it. “Poor John was having a hard time trying to figure out who to tend to first when I’d be crying along with Ronan.”

John chuckles as he nods, “I think we got it down now though.”

“Sort of, I’m still having weird emotions, and I’m still starving. Like I could literally eat non-stop.” you chuckle, then you shrug as you look at Amanda, “But things are starting to look up.”

Once Amanda got wind of what was happening with you (definitely from Tess, which you don’t mind), she started making some meals for you and John. She’d drop them off on the front step without even sticking around. It was nice how she respected that you and John just needed your privacy for awhile.

You smile as you look at her, “Thank you so much for making those meals for us. I think we have enough leftovers to last us for the next two months.”

“Of course!” Amanda smiles genuinely, then she looks at Aurelio, “I didn’t want anyone around after I had Benji, so I totally understand that you weren’t up for visitors. I am more than happy to respect that. Postpartum is freaking hard!”

“Well, she’s not gonna get rid of me though. I don’t care what you say.” Tess says, and you smile at her.

You chuckle as your eyes fall onto everyone, “I don’t want to get rid of any of you guys. You’ve been such a big help to us, so seriously, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.”

John nods, “Thanks for everything.”

Aurelio waves his hand, “Not a problem, man.”

“Are you feeling better?” Amanda asks, and you inhale as you nod.

“John and I went out and did some running around two days ago, and I felt so freaking good!” you say, then you shake your head, “We had breakfast out with Ro, we went and did some grocery shopping, went out to dinner with Tess and Jimmy. Had a great night at home just hanging out. Next morning I woke up and was just…dead. I had no motivation to get up, I wanted to crawl in a hole and just cry all day.”

John pats your leg, “She just needs to find a balance.”

“I feel like I’ve found it now.” you say, nodding your head, “I think I just pushed myself because I felt so good, so for the last few days, we’ve just been taking it really easy and keeping to ourselves. My mom has been coming over to help out too, so it’s nice. I’m really starting to feel like myself again. Thank god!”

Amanda laughs, then she looks at Ronan in John’s arms, “How was your labor?”

“It was so good. My labor and birth were really good, and everything went really smooth.”

“It was amazing.” John smiles, and you roll your eyes a little. “I was so proud of her.”

You shake your head a little and look at Amanda, “I started having contractions around 3 in the morning and they lasted for about 12 hours. I didn’t want to go to the hospital and be sent home, but finally I agreed to go since I had no idea what my progress was. We started heading to the house to get our things, next thing I knew, my water broke and John was frantically running around to get everything. I got to the hospital, waited a little bit longer, got my epidural, and didn’t feel much.”

“The best.” Tess says as she sits down.

“Yeah,” you nod, looking over to check on Ronan, “We came home that next night and had such good sleep, then everything went downhill with me. Honestly I thought he’d see what a mess I was and just take off with Ronan.”

John laughs, “Absolutely not. Who would I get to change her smelly diapers?”

You playfully slap the back of your hand against his arm and laugh, “Ass.”

“You seem much better!” Amanda smiles as she lets go of Harper.

“Much better! We’re so in love with this little bug and I feel so complete when I have John and her in my arms. I just adore them both.” you say, then you look down at Harper, “Do you want to see my baby?”

Harper nods her head as she looks up at you, then she crawls onto the loveseat between you and John. He carefully places Ronan in her arms and keeps his hands on her so she doesn’t fall. Aurelio and Amanda both get out of their seats and kneel down to take a picture of Harper, and the smile on her face is so sweet.

You look up at Benji, who is keeping his distance and playing with Finn, then you smile, “Benji, do you want to see her?”

Benji shrugs a little, then he walks over and looks at Ronan. He’s trying his hardest not to smile, but when Ronan kicks her legs and grunts a little, he lets out a laugh, “What’s her name?”

“Her name is Ronan.” John smiles, and Benji leans over more to look at Ronan.

“Uh, are you her dad?”

John smiles proudly, “I am. And Y/N is her mom.”

“She’s little.”

“She is very little.” John laughs, then he looks at you and leans over to kiss your cheek. “I think she’s gonna be pretty tiny like her mom, but soon she’ll be a big kid like Finn, so you can play with her.”

“I can play with her and Finn?”

Aurelio laughs as he ruffles his hair, “Of course.”

Tess sits down on the arm of the loveseat and nudges you, “Hey, how did her appointment go?”

“Really well. We liked Doctor Marlene.”

John laughs, “It’s a little weird that she goes by her first name, but she was nice.”

Tess lets out a loud laugh as she tilts her head back, “Jimmy thinks it’s weird too.”

“Our appointment went well. She lost a little weight, but that’s to be expected of course.” you say, and you reach over to take Ronan when she gets a bit fussy, “John was beyond nervous for our appointment, and he’ll end up giving himself a heart attack if he doesn’t calm down a little.”

John laughs, “It’s stressful having a kid.”

Aurelio and Jimmy both laugh and nod their heads, but Tess immediately rolls her eyes and scoffs, “Being a dad is much easier than being a mom, let’s be real.”

“I won’t fight you on that.” Jimmy smiles as he wraps his arm around her shoulder.

__

Ronan was a little sleepy from all the excitement she had today, and she went down a little sooner than usual. You and John got her bathed, fed, and in bed within an hour, and you’re just now waiting on the couch for John to get done cleaning the patio.

John finally comes inside and presses a kiss to the top of your head as he walks past. He heads into the bathroom, then he comes out a few minutes later and plops down on the couch next to you, “What are we watching?”

“Uh,” you look at the TV and shrug, “I don’t know. Up to you.”

As John exhales, he takes the remote from you and flips around the channels to find something. With no luck, he mutes the TV and puts the remote down, “How about we just talk? Maybe you can tell me what’s been bothering you all day?”

You scrunch your face up as you laugh, “How did you even know?”

“Remember, Mrs. Wick, I know you very well.”

Taking a deep breath, you look down at your hands in your lap and watch as John intertwines his fingers with yours. You look up at him timidly and shrug, “You promise not to be mad at me?”

“Never.” he says, letting go of your hand to wrap his arm around your shoulder, “These are your feelings, and I would never get mad at you for having them.”

“Since Ronan has been born, I feel like you’ve been doing all of the work. I wake up in the night to feed her and change her, but you tell me to go back to bed. During the day, I try to feed her and you go do it instead. I feel like I’m not getting the chance to be her mom. I mean, even at the doctor earlier, I just sat there and let you do everything. I feel like I’m either not pulling my weight, or I’m just not made to be a mom.”

John looks at you as you talk, and he squeezes your hand a little tighter to let you know that he’s listening and taking in everything that you’re saying.

“Thank you for telling me how you’re feeling.” he says, and he wipes away the small tear escaping from your eye. “You were definitely made to be a mom, baby. You are so good with Ronan. When you change her and feed her, it’s like second nature to you. You could do it all with your hand tied behind your back. I’m sorry that you feel this way, but I promise that it’s not true. You are pulling your weight. You’re doing exactly what you need to be doing right now: resting.”

“But I’m not getting up and helping you in the night.”

John smiles tenderly, “Because I want you to rest. I want you to feel like yourself again, and that starts with you resting. I know how tired you are, and trust me, I’m tired too, but it’s nothing compared to what you’re feeling.”

“I am pretty tired.” you whisper, then you exhale loudly, “It’s just that I’m starting to feel better now, and I don’t want you to think that I’m taking advantage of the fact that you are helping out with her. I don’t want you to do everything for her.”

John nods his head, “You and Ronan have a bond that I will never have with her. You carried her inside of you for nine whole months. She’s only been here for a week, but your bond with her is already incredibly strong. I feel like it’s important for me to take over some of the work because it helps me bond with her.”

“Hmm,” you look up at John and shrug, “I never thought of that. I guess I just thought about how I was feeling.”

“I was thinking about myself too.” John admits. “I guess I didn’t think about how that hurt your feelings when I would kind of push you out of the way to do things for her instead. I really was doing it in your best interest, I would never purposefully push you out of the way. I just want you to feel like yourself again.”

You exhale as you look over at him, “I know, and I know I should be thankful that you’re even willing to get up and tend to her in the night, so with that being said, thank you so much for all you’re doing for our daughter and me. I promise it doesn’t go unnoticed.”

John lets out a small laugh as he pulls you closer, “You don’t need to thank me. I’m just doing my job, and honestly, it’s fun. I like it. But I promise to let you get her in the night.”

“I just want us to have those special little moments as a family, you know? I just want to have those moments so we’ll look back in four years and say ‘man, she was up all night that night, but it was nice to have you with me the whole time’, you know?”

“I just…” John stops talking as he looks away from you, and you notice tears in his eyes when he looks up at you, “Seeing you in so much pain, it brought back memories that I never wanted to think about again. Losing Helen was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to go through, and even though I knew you weren’t going to die, I still had this fear of losing you--I always have the fear of losing you. I just thought if I did everything, you wouldn’t strain yourself.”

“John…” you whisper softly as you turn to face him, “I’m not going anywhere. I promise I will never leave you. Not only am I in this for the long haul, I’m healthy too! I’m perfectly fine! You’re not losing me…ever!”

John nods his head a few times and finally looks up at you, “I don’t think I’d be able to handle losing you. I would die. I’m not being dramatic either.”

“Well,” you laugh a little, “Yeah, you are. We had a talk about this already, remember?”

John playfully rolls his eyes, “I know, I know. Sometimes I just feel like you have an expiration date, sometimes I just feel like I’m running out of time with you. I only had Helen for five years before I lost her, and I can’t go through it all again. I feel…cursed.”

“Why are you talking about me dying as if it’s going to happen? John, I’m going to be around for a long time. I mean, you’re going to be sick of me by the time Ronan is three.”

“Never,” he shakes his head as he chuckles, “I will never be sick of you. You’re my favorite person on this planet. I never get tired of being around you. Haven’t you figured that out yet?”

You look at John as you smile, “Yeah, I mean, I’m the same way.”

“Even when you leave to hang out with Tess for the day, I just have my phone glued to my hand just in case you’ll text me.” he says, then he laughs, “Wow, I sound clingy.”

Shaking your head, you move to sit in John’s lap, “Not at all, because I’m the same way. I just love you so much, John. Seeing you with Ronan has, like I said earlier, made me love you so much more. I love seeing you in this role. It’s my favorite thing we’ve ever done together.”

“I can’t lose you.” he whispers against your lips.

“You won’t.” you whisper back, then you hold his gaze, “I’m sticking around for a long time, so you better get used to it.”

John smiles as he leans forward to kiss you, and he cups your face to keep you from moving away too quickly. He sucks on your bottom lip as you cup his face, then he slides his tongue into your mouth.

You sigh, “How are we ever going to last six weeks?”

“You wanna have sex with me?”

You shrug a little, “I mean, I’m still sore down there and when I start to get a little turned on, my vagina reminds me to calm down, but…”

John laughs so loud that he puts his hand over his mouth so he doesn’t wake up Ronan, “I’m flattered.”

“I miss having sex with you. I miss when we’d have sex and I could…” you look away from John as your cheeks turn red, but he cups your face to bring your gaze back to him, “I miss not having a belly and being able to lay under you and feel my chest against yours. I miss seeing you on top of me, I miss feeling you inside of me. I know we had sex the day before Ronan was born, but still…”

John chuckles softly, “I think this is harder for you than it is for me.”

“Thanks, John.” you say, flatly. “That sure made me feel good.”

“Hey,” he cups your face with his right hand and wraps his left arm around you tighter, “You know that I want you…so ridiculously bad. It’s very hard not to just bend you over the table and fuck you. We’ll never be able to do that again.”

You furrow your brow, “I have a mom and a sister who both would love to take Ronan off our hands for the day.”

John laughs again, “I can’t believe we’re sitting here a week after having a baby and talking about how we’ll never have sex again.”

“She is not sleeping in our room forever. I think she should stay in there for about a month, then she needs to go into her own room. We were smart when we decided that during the day, she’d sleep in her room for her naps.” you cup John’s face and smile, “Once I get the okay from my doctor that I’m good to have sex, you better run, Mr. Wick.”

John smiles as he pulls you closer, “Oh, yeah, I’ll run as fast as I can.”

Wrapping your arms around John’s neck, you press your lips to his softly, then you part your lips so he can slide his tongue into your mouth. You move your hand into John’s hair as the kisses become more passionate and frantic, then you lean back a little to look at John as the two of you smile.

“Yeah, I don’t think I’ll run at all,” he whispers, and you laugh as you get up.

John hops up from the couch and walks through the house to turn off all of the lights and lock up while you head upstairs to your room. You bend over a little to look at Ronan swaddled in her bed, and you shake your head a little as you look at her.

“She’s so unbelievably cute.” you whisper, rubbing your finger against her cheek. “I know parents always think their baby is cute, but like…she actually is.”

John stands behind you and wraps his arms around your waist, “She is very cute.”

“I know she’s sleeping, but I just want to hold her and snuggle her so bad.” you say, moving out of John’s arms to change into your pajamas--and to keep you from grabbing Ronan to hold her. “I can’t wait until she’s like six months old.”

“Why six months?”

You laugh quietly as you crawl in bed, “I’m guessing you haven’t read that far ahead in your baby books yet.”

John laughs as he pulls his pants off, “No, I was kind of focusing on the pregnancy and newborn stuff. Silly me.”

You playfully roll your eyes and chuckle, “Six months is my favorite. Babies can sit without support, they know their name, they know their parents by then, well, before then but…you get what I mean. Some babies try to crawl. They’re very talkative, and they’re usually pretty chunky at that point. You know I love a chunky baby.”

“I’m excited for that, but at the same time…” John sighs and walks over to look at Ronan, “I don’t ever want her to grow up.”

You nod, “I know. I can’t believe we have a week old baby.”

John sits down on the edge of the bed and you sit up to lean against his shoulder as he smiles, “Look at her. She’s just so perfect. Her perfect round little head and her perfect skin.”

“I still can’t believe that she’s ours. We get to keep her forever.” you say, chuckling a little. “I can’t wait to raise her with you, Jonathan. You’re such an understanding and patient man. Ronan is very lucky to have a dad like that. Especially in this day and age. I want Ronan to be able to be who she is and I don’t want her to ever feel ashamed about who she is. I want her to be confident and happy in life, and with us as her parents, I think she will be.”

“I just love her.” he says, looking down at her one last time before getting in bed. “I’ll love her no matter what. No matter what.”

“And that’s why you’re the perfect person to be her dad.” you say, wrapping your arm around John when he lays down, “Something tells me that that little girl is going to have a mind of her own, and she’s going to have a voice that she won’t be afraid to use. I couldn’t be prouder of that.”

John smiles proudly as he looks at you, “She is our daughter after all.”

__

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[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 3227

i went to PT this morning and got a phone call from them as i pulled into the parking lot that my appointment was for 7:30, not 8. which i knew because i'd looked at it after showering, which was still 7:45, so regardless i was gonna be late. while i was showering though i thought "wait, was today's supposed to be early, or...?" so when i was done i checked and ta da, that was today. but it wound up not being a problem anyway, because someone had space at 8.

after PT i stopped at starbucks for cocoa because it was chilly and i'd just had ice packs on my shoulders.

i went to work and was there on time and it was actually all okay even though i was really busy and i didn't get the chance to write reports. i need to do that. i really gotta write reports. i told myself i'd be better at writing them this year but that hasn't really happened. it's just exhausting, i guess.

after work i went back to joel's and napped for a while. when i got up i packed my things and came home, after briefly accosting joel with affection. (he also stole my pillow last night - i blame the lack of pillow for my bad sleeping lmao. he's so cute though, so i can't stay mad. ever.) at home i was just in time to open my class photos that had arrived, set the table, and sit down before dinner was done.

after dinner hummus and i went on an adventure to find medicine pocket treats for the cats because zoe needs meds and simon has an appointment tomorrow so he needs meds too. we found them at walmart and stopped for ice cream on the way back.

by 10 simon hadn't eaten his meds but he had launched himself at mom again, so i went downstairs to see if i could get him to eat the meds or at least lick it off. he hadn't been fed, so i eventually needed to tear apart the treats into little bits and add dry food to it so he'd get the mix of same size bits all at once. i think it worked. he's been pretty chill since then.

i laid down and started season 3 of lok, which is honestly incredible and i love it a lot. i love that it's getting into family dynamics of the different families of the original characters as time has gone on. it makes me happy but it also makes me cry because that shit is HARD.

anyway it's now half past 2 and i need sleep bc i'm gonna be working in the garden tomorrow or i'm going to be cleaning my room. i don't know which yet.

bonus thought: i hate that the far right button on movie isn't tags anymore. i hate that it's above the row above the keyboard instead of in the row above it. ugh. every time.

[bluedemon1995]

October 16: Trouble

Saturday detention at 8 am was not a place Pidge typically found herself. In fact, for all the trouble she caused, she actually had never been issued detention. But drastic measures were needed if she wanted access to the school’s main server. After some thought, she figured no one would notice if she disappeared for a little bit.

So far so good. It’s been about 30 minutes and the teacher assigned this dismal duty was busy whispering into his phone and not even looking out toward the class. No one checked the school id so she just initialed next to the name that had none. She figured to lay low until 9 then planned to ‘go to the restroom’ and she was good. Feeling bored, she evaluated her classmates who weren’t talented enough to not get caught. She saw a girl who was in her grade who she heard had got caught cheating on a Spanish test, then behind her was a guy who honestly was probably high. Then there were a few seniors who got in trouble for the senior prank. She didn’t know what they were thinking pulling fire alarms in the middle of the day during passing periods when teachers were actually in the halls! It’s like they didn’t even try! Honestly, a little planning really goes a long way.

Feeling exhausted, she lowers her head to the desk, absently wondering why the heat wasn’t on. If they were holding detention, at least, they could be warm. But for all she knows, this is part of the punishment. Smirking, she imagined the principal making this day as uncomfortable as possible. Closing her eyes she figured she could maybe nap until she got to work. She felt the air move and the scraping of a chair. The room was practically empty why would someone sit next to her?!

Determined to keep her eyes close and not engage, she tenses when she feels someone lean in close, warm breath on her ear, causing an involuntary shiver. Whispered words, “They warned me about you, I should have listened.”

What the fuck? My eyes flash open to stare into Keith’s laughing eyes.

October 17: Train

Self-defense class. Katie Holt was in a roomful of women, wives, and daughters, to train. Learn how to defend themselves they said. Matt said it would be fun. Her dad claimed it was for her own good. She nodded. She believed them. But really it was like a popularity contest. Sighing, looked around at the girls her age. They initially had everyone in one room, for one week. Then they split the group into groups and she was now stuck with a bunch of spoiled princesses.

Dressed in coordinating outfits, fancy shoes, and full-on hair and makeup. Who learned to fight all dolled up? Her brother was one of the ‘teachers’ and she could safely say he was not focused on teaching her how to punch or kick. Instead, he was too busy staring at Allura’s chest, which honestly was pretty impressive. But again, NOT the purpose of today. At her groan, Matt finally looked at Katie. “What’s up Pidgey?”

She pointed across the room. “Who’s that?”

Matt slapped her hand, “Don’t point! Oh! Someone. You don’t want to mess with it. I heard. That..”

Too late. She was already walking over. Yeah, that’s who she wanted to teach her. The one guy in the room who wasn’t busy staring at the bevy of beautiful women but instead was using the boxing bag. She thought his name might be …

October 18: Horseback Riding

Keith grinned taking a deep breath of crisp country air. This was definitely different; the group decided to spend fall break at a ranch. Pidge joked that it was because Matt needed a boyfriend but honestly they all just were desperate for a break. From politics. From watching what they say. From having to be decorous and polite. Or maybe that was just him but honestly, Keith was actually happy this place had a no-tech rule.

He turned back trying to catch sight of Pidge who was decidedly less enthusiastic about the lack of technology. Once they got here and they collected all their devices, he actually thought she was going to cry. The look she gave Matt, well, as Lance said he better sleep with his eyes open. Currently, he was second in a long row of his friends riding on horseback. They took a path through a small forest and currently on the edge of a small bluff. Looking down, he hoped these horses were well-trained. Knowing his friends, Lance was most likely not really paying attention and he knew Hunk would be scared shitless if he looked down.

As they were traveling around the bend, he caught sight of Pidge. She was, fuck, she was last. And falling quickly. Frowning he pulled his horse to the side, he thought these people were trained. The lady in front of him quickly turned, “Hey pardner, stay in line.”

“Uh, yeah, but my friend is falling behind. I’m going-“

“Oh don’t worry, Derek is bringing up the rear. He’ll make sure no one gets left behind. Now, as I was saying, this ridge line-“

Keith tuned out the woman and used the reins to head to the back. He wasn’t trusting Derek with his…halting his thoughts a yell clearly came from the back.

He couldn’t see Pidge at this point, but her voice clearly indicated she was not happy.

“I’m not getting back on the damn horse bud. Nope. The horse must be suicidal and he is NOT taking me with him!”

As Keith nears Pidge, he motions to Matt that he’s got the situation covered. His horse trots over and he sees Pidge standing off the side of the path and emphasized her point by stamping her foot. He jumped off his horse and asks, “What happened?”

Derek replies, “Nothing really, Katie just got scared when Wilson got a little too close to the edge.” He smiles encouragingly at her, eyes never leaving hers.

Keith stood an intentional step closer to Pidge and broke their gaze. Frowning, he decided he didn’t like this guy. At all.

The woman who was leading their group was suddenly here and Keith absently noticed that the entire group has now stopped and was watching.

“Listen, honey, you need to get back on your horse. We are too far to walk and our horses are well-trained. Up.”

Keith smirked. Yeah that wasn’t going to work.

“Excuse me!? I was on the damn horse so I know what I’m talking about! If you weren’t so busy flirting with anything with a penis you’d have noticed. So no, honey, I’m not getting back on that horse. Why don’t we switch if he’s so well trained?!”

Keith grinned. Yeah, he knew that wasn’t going to happen. But then the ranch hand interrupted and said, “You can always ride with me. I promise you’ll be safe with me.”

Keith growled, “Yeah, no. She can ride with me.” Pulling on her arm he moved her closer to him and his horse.

The woman once again talked down to Pidge but Keith was pissed now. “Annie, look, we are just wasting time and daylight. She’ll ride with me.”

The woman rolled her eyes, “My name is Ann! I’ve already told you that!”

Keith shrugged, “Okay, Ann. Why don’t you grab Pidge’s horse and let’s be on our way.”

“No, we don’t let guests ride double so she has to be with Derek.”

Before Pidge had time to reply, Keith quickly shook his head no. “This is not up for debate. She rides with me or we both walk. Non-negotiable and aren’t we paying you for this experience?”

“Yeah, your customer service sucks! Once I am back to civilization you better believe I’m leaving an in-depth review!”

Keith tried not to laugh but Shiro was not as successful. Going into dad and negotiator mode, he states, “We don’t mean to be difficult. But, this ride is much longer than the stated 30 minutes and I think we all are ready to head back. Katie can ride with Keith, he’s ridden before so it is fine. Really.”

“And maybe if you didn’t give me such a stubborn horse this wouldn’t be an issue!”

Keith nodded, “Yeah, okay that’s settled.” He turned to Pidge, lowering his voice, “Need a boost? I swear, I’ve got you.”

After a few tense moments, she moves back to the front of the line and Derek quickly moves off. As they start riding again, Keith murmurs into Katie’s ear, “Suicidal horse? Please tell me more.”

Keith can feel Pidge relax into his body and as she details her ride, he thinks, she fits in my arms really well. Really.

[sylvinuk-turkey]

For breakfast today (Saturday) we finished the amazing handmade sigara boregi that Gokay’s aunt made the day we arrived and left in the fridge for us. We also had some leftover borek. We left the house around 10:30a by taxi to get to the archeology museum. On the way Gokay had to stop to get his mom something that we will bring to them tomorrow. Due to traffic the taxi driver dropped us at the train station in old Istanbul and we walked about 8 min to the museum.

The museum is physically part of the topkapi palace but a different entrance fee. Luckily we have the museumpass, which let us skip the line that had formed and go right through. There was a woman and son from Rome entering at the same time and I said a quick hello.

The museum itself was alright, it had some beautifully preserved sarcophagi from Lebanon area that were very detailed. There were also a variety of pottery, sculpture/busts, some interesting metal coins/money, and some interesting jewelry/crowns. As we were finishing in the main building, it started pouring rain… which the forecast said nothing about. So we waited about 10-15 minutes and it cleared up. At which point we crossed the courtyard to the other building which used to be the head(s) of the palace staff/caretakers housing but now holds ottoman pottery. The building also still had its original tiling and stained glass windows (it seems).

Adam and Carley went to the outdoor museum cafe for coffee while Gokay and I finished looking at the ottoman stuff. Then we headed to lunch by taking the tram one stop back toward the train station we started at.

The lunch place Gokay found was in a covered alley way, and it was a Pide place since that was one of the last foods on Adam’s list to try in Turkey. Pide is basically pizza/calzone depending on the style, but in an oblong shape instead of round. We got three types - original minced meat, closed sucuk and cheese, and a cheese and egg. Yum! We drank “Turkish Sprite” called Nigde Gazozu We finished the meal with Turkish tea. Which Gokay told us today that Turkey consumes the most tea (Turkish black tea specifically) of any country… on average about 3.6 cups a day/person. That’s 1300 cups (or 15.5lbs) a year/person.

After lunch Adam and Carly wanted to finish some gift shopping in the Old Bazaar. So we walked back through the Bazaar the other direction from last time. I actually finally found some flowy pants that fit me, Carley found some earrings for her family, and Adam got more collectible paper money from around the world and a few other gifts.

We made our way out of the bazaar to take the tram out of the city. Instead of finding an empty road to grab a taxi there was a ton of traffic… so we finally decided to take public transit all the way home (4 total lines including the tram we just got off). We took the fenicular up the hill again and then got on M2 and then had to get on M6 which drops us one block from Gokay’s parents place.

Being a little cranky and tired, and knowing we were possibly going to have a late night, we took a nap (not too long though). Then around 8:30 we got ready to go out for the evening for dinner and possibly a club. We left around 9:30p by taxi, and ended up at the flower passage near Taksim for dinner.

We grabbed the first table and ate for about 2 hours. It was similar to the seafood place in experience in the sense that we ordered a variety of small cold appetizers (e.g, hummus, yogurt, beans etc.), then a couple of warm appetizers (e.g., calamari, fried mussels) then a main dish (kofta) and a dessert (some fresh fruit). We also had a beer each.

Once we finished we headed to a club Adam had heard about. It was closed, but we had passed a couple places on the way, so we headed back to one of those. I’m not a night owl so between it being late (even with a nap) and it being smokey inside which I’m not used to, I wasn’t super excited to continue the evening. Gokay and I were going to head out and Adam and Carley stay, but in the end we all left and headed back to the metro and took the metro home. We got home around 2a. Tomorrow is the last mostly full day, and we head to Selimiye on a 5p flight.

[dinamakan]

WNRS Pt. 2

Hi! Have you read the first part? I’m back with another deck (using the same secret seed): Healing.

2. What emotion keeps coming up for you lately? Why do you think that is? It’s hard to pick one so please let me answer this with two emotions: passionate and anxious. These keep coming because I’m on the way to achieve my goals.

5. How can you contribute to someone else's happiness today? Do that thing, big or small. Sorry, not today. I need to concentrate on a thing, but I promise that in weekly reading session tomorrow, I’ll let my pals to be joyful. As usual you guys are welcome to share your book reviews.

6. What title would you give this chapter of your healing journey? “The Most Resilient Person I Have Ever Known”

7. What hurt your younger self that you never fully healed from? What would you say to your younger self today? Uh, I clearly have the answer in my mind but it’s way too embarrassing. I’d say, “You’ll get that in your 20s, bigger things will come in your late 20s and years ahead, hence you have to live a long life.”

9. How have you neglected your mental health recently? What's one small way you can make it up to yourself? I put myself under tremendous pressure. Perhaps a small step I can take is allowing myself to take a nap.

10. Finish the sentence: I need help with ___prayers so that my life runs smoothly___.

11. What's a boundary you can set with yourself today that will benefit future you? Not always available for others! I have my own life, schedules and plans.

12. How do you define happiness? Get specific. Happiness is a feeling when I get what I want. Whatever my wish is, whether it’s a major life goal, finishing a work I love, or my favorite soy milk, I’m content when I get it. I never had wishes that were destructive or harmful, we’re responsible for our own ambitions. :)

15. Wild Card: Write out 3 things that made you smile today. This Tumblr (IDK why), some of the completed designs, and The Inside Outtakes by Bo Burnham.

17. What's something you can say "no" to this week to prioritize your mental health? What's something you can say "yes" to? I’d say no for long conversations and yes to exercising again this weekend!

18. What's been causing you unnecessary stress? What would help alleviate that for you? Unexpected people passing by on social media can stress me out, but thanks to “not interested in this Tweet”, mute, and block buttons.

19. Finish the sentence: I'm working on accepting ___the fact that I’m late in life so far, 'cause things will be fine in the future___. [#nowplaying Late in Life - Club 8]

21. Reminder: I'm proud of the progress you're making. No matter how small. Merci beaucoup. :)

28. Wild Card: Take 3 deep breaths before flipping to the next card. Hold for 2 seconds between each breath. This is good for reducing the tension in my head.

30. What do you need right now more than anything? Tons of energy to accomplish all tasks on a to-do list.

35. What is your body telling you today? Cramps in my body and tension in my head are enough to remind me not to push myself today. It’s like telling me to finish the plan step by step.

36. What do you understand now about the healing process that you didn't before? What seemed eternal (such as a wound that doesn’t heal) turns out to be transient. Perhaps that line looks cliché, but the contrast before and after recovery is palpable to me.

44. How has your mental health affected your romantic relationships, if at all? Romantic relationship is not my priority. Of course it has to do with my mental state which is focused on my life goals individually.

48. What song makes you happy? Play it in the background while you answer the next few cards. Faint - Linkin Park. Based on the lyrics, it’s definitely not a happy song but I feel like I can pour out all the emotions inside me just from hearing it.

49. What piece of advice has helped your mental health the most? Actually there was a tweet from stranger who shared a little story based on her own experience and it’s still comforting me now. I’ve bookmarked it, sorry for keeping it as a secret. But so far the books by Matt Haig and Paulo Coelho have given me great advice.

50. What's one thing (big or small) you're most looking forward to? What about it excites you most? The best version of me, because the opportunities are waiting in front of me. Glad to know there’s always a chance to be a better person.