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mllechartreux · 2 years

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Production Team

Summary: You’re an R&B singer looking to take more creative freedom over your music and life. Levi, your producer, helps you with that.

Tags: Singer!Reader x Producer!Levi, Rapper!Eren, Eren is an asshole, GN!Publicist, pining, professional friends to lovers, music industry bullshit, MDNI!smut, fingering, oral(f. receiving), vaginal sex, creampie, unprotected sex, tiny mention of mary jane

WC: 4.5k

A/N: Ya’ll, I need my props for this line right here, it’s so fucking Levi, “An asshole’s job is to find the newest shit,” I’m copyrighting that expeditiously! Also, don’t be mad at me for making Eren an asshole. Mannnn, I don’t even know how this ended up being so long, fuuuucckk. I also think I fucked up the tenses *sigh* bear with me still working on my writing style.

Masterlist

Normally, starting out your day with breakfast wasn’t a problem. In fact, you loved the smell of bacon, eggs and Thai tea in the morning. It made your mouth water, but it also gave you a sense of control in your life that was hard to come by, being a public figure. Oftentimes, being in the limelight, your life is reduced to what everyone else says it is.

Currently, blogs came out saying you were dating a rapper you met with for copyright reasons. You barely knew the guy, on top of that, you tried to convince the media, many times before, that you weren’t looking for a relationship. Yet, ever since you had debuted as a mainstream r&b artist, they never stopped asking you about your love life. Like can’t a girl be single, or pining after a man in secret. Either way, the thought of breakfast this morning made you sick, all you were focused on was ignoring the calls from your publicist and getting to the studio. You hoped that working on your new song with your favorite producer would help bring you a moment of peace.

You pulled up to the studio in your dark green Aston Martin, grabbed your white Fendi purse and hopped out of the car. On your way to your producer’s recording studio you passed security and the wall of records. Each time you passed this wall you hoped that yours would be the next platinum record to be hung there.

You entered his studio optimistically and couldn’t hold back the smile that crept on your face when you saw Levi sitting in his chair, headphones on, slumped over the computer, working. You were consumed with admiration watching how focused and attentive he was.

It almost didn’t matter that there was a band in the studio this close your time slot. In his defense, you did arrive 10 mins earlier than your session appointment, but you were still deflated over not having his undivided attention. Slightly irritated, you sat down on the couch behind him, bouncing your leg impatiently.

15 minutes passed before the band exited the booth and regrouped with Levi. As the band walked out of the studio they offered a short greeting to you causing you to look up from your phone to reciprocate, your eyes staring after them up until the door closed behind them. What you didn’t know was that you were being watched as well.

Levi marveled at your appearance. You had boho braids in a simple ponytail, a blue cropped tank top showing off your waist beads, belly button piercing and a fairy tattoo along your ribs, paired with tan cargo pants and blue mules. He cleared his throat absentmindedly to bring back his focus, but you snapped your head towards him, looking at him curiously, “You know I would have kicked them out anytime if I knew you were here,” he recovered monotonously.

You scoffed, rising lazily from your seat on the couch to plop down haphazardly on the swivel chair next to him, “You can’t kick out your clients, don’t be silly.”

His black eyebrow raised at your statement, pondering the brash way you moved across the room, “I thought I told you before I do as I please, I don’t care if you're a client or an exec.”

You stared at him unbelievably with your mouth slightly agape, “Levi. Don’t get fired running your mouth.” He rolled his eyes.

“As if, they wouldn’t have a single platinum record coming out of this company if they did that and they know it. Besides, who else would be able to deal with your bratty attitude,” he concluded. He brought a leg to cross over the other and ran his hand through the front of his hair, pushing his bangs back.

Consciously, you knew what he said was true, but the thought of never working with him is what made you react anyway.

Slightly taken aback at his observation of your attitude, you leaned back slightly and squinted your eyes playfully, “I’m far from bratty, a perfectionist maybe, but definitely not a diva,” you said matter of factly while pointing at him sassily as if you had a finger gun.

“Oh really, then if it’s not your personality, care to tell me what’s been up your ass lately?” He stares at you. He tried to say, ‘Tell me what’s wrong, I can always tell’, hell he’d been working with you for a year now, but he was never good at using words to show he cared.

You looked to the side and shifted in your seat to cross your legs, “Everyone is being an ass over this rumor of me dating so and so,”

He hums and continues, “Do they have it right this time?”

“No! I haven’t dated anyone since I became mainstream,” You retaliate, throwing your arms up. It kinda hurt that he thought there was anyone you could be interested in, anyone but him.

His eyes softened but his mind whirled in confusion, why did he feel relieved at that, “Then don’t worry about it, an asshole’s job is to find the newest shit,” he scratched the back of his neck, “just leave it all in the booth today,” a blush dusted his cheeks but his eyes never left yours.

He felt the need to reassure you more but knew there was a line of professionalism he couldn’t cross, at least not while on the clock.

His ‘shitty’ proverbs always made you laugh, they were so him. With watery eyes, you gave him a look filled with appreciation and understanding, hoping he'd receive your mental messages of gratitude. You stood from your seat, “You’re right. Thanks Levi,” and made your way into the booth.

You put the headphones on and he told you what track he was going to play, “Let’s work on the ad libs for this one, after that this one is pretty much finished,” you gave him a thumbs up through the glass. Once the music started playing you closed your eyes and started swaying to the beat.

“Ok that’s a wrap for today, great job Y/N, I got everything I needed,”

You took the headphones off, eyes still closed while your mind tried to find its way back to reality. Your eyes fluttered open to meet his through the glass before he looked down back at his computer. It was hard to make out his expression.

Levi continued to work on the song as you walked out of the booth and sat beside him. Your perfume wafted towards him, almost unnoticeably it made his eyelids lower and his hands pause from typing. Without looking up from his screen, “So for your album you only have three songs left to work on, but here take a listen to this one,” he took his headphones off and put them over your ears, his hands lingering over them for a moment longer before turning back to the screen.

The song started playing and you listened to yourself sing. It was a song about summer love, sweet, overwhelming, and colorful. It was probably your favorite song on this album. One, because it’s what you thought being with Levi would feel like, but also because it was the only song you had creative freedom over.

After the song finished you took off the headphones and set them back on the desk, causing him to turn his head towards you, “It’s beautiful, I really like how the bridge fades in,” you muse, “Definitely better than those songs the label commissioned for me,” your lip lifts in disgust.

“Tch, they sent me the demo and I thought they were joking,” he pinches the bridge of his nose, “I’m good at what I do but I’m definitely not a miracle worker,” his arms come to cross over his chest. More importantly, he thought you were better than those cheesy, shallow songs. Even if the lyrics weren’t a factor, the songs left no room for you to truly showcase your range and shit did he love to hear your voice. He loved to hear it before all the edits he made, when it was in its raw state.

“I know, I hate those songs, but capitalism over authenticity, right. It took a lot just for me to get creative freedom over this one,” you lean over to rest your arm on the desk and your head on your arm.

“Explains why this song is by far the best,” he says casually, watching you.

You look up at him sternly, “Don’t bullshit me Levi,”

He scoffed, “You think I have the capacity to bullshit anyone,”

At that you laugh, “I forget who I’m talking to sometimes, my bad,” holding your hands up feigning surrender before putting your head back on your hand, “I just wish they would let me release more of my music. They’re really trying to pigeonhole me into being yet another oversexualized black woman.”

Levi looked to the side before tilting his head back looking at the ceiling, “What if… what if I help you?” His heart was pumping thinking about the opportunity to hear more of your music, to see more of you.

“What do you mean?” Your eyebrows pinch together.

He looked back down at you and unfolded his arms, “I mean, what if I help you record your music? We probably can’t release it or anything but at least you’d be able to create it.”

You lifted your head in interest and looked at him unwavering, “You’d do that? For me?”

“Yea, I don’t really see a point in keeping it locked up,” he says matter of factly.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” you squeal, leaping from your seat and wrapping your arms around him.

Levi was hardly expecting you to be so excited and to inadvertently smother your boobs in his face. He was frozen so he couldn’t even bring himself to hug you back. He felt the heat from your chest on his blushed face. It was embarrassing how that paired with the scent of jasmine and orange blossom coming from you made his dick twitch.

You abruptly let go of him, “I imagine we won’t have time to do this during my normal sessions so when do you want to start?” Still smiling at him.

“Come back at 7, and the studio is ours for the rest of the night,” he nodded at you tensely.

“Alright bet,” you exclaim walking backwards toward the door, still looking at him adoringly, “and thank you again Levi, I really appreciate this,” your hand reaches to grab the door knob.

“Don’t forget your purse.”

You let go of the door and rushed to the sofa to grab your purse, “I wasn’t forgetting it, just making sure the door worked,” you said almost convincingly.

“Tch, right,” he grinned. He couldn’t help but find you adorable while you walked out of the studio.

The plan was to drive back to your house, work more on your music while you waited for 7 to roll around. It was a simple, solid plan until you pulled up to your house and saw your publicist and two other people waiting in front of your door.

As slow and languid as possible you got out of your car, slamming the door shut. They turned to look at you, and your publicist spoke first, “I’ve been calling and texting you all day, we have to talk,” their hand on their hip and hip jutted out.

“I assume you wouldn’t call to listen to me breathe, so no need to point out the obvious,” you walked past them to unlock your door, sparing an annoyed glance when you recognized one of the people as Eren Yeager, the rapper you met with a several days earlier, and the other person you guessed was his manager or something.

“Shoes off please,” as you walked into your house, leading them down the carpeted hallway filled with pictures of family and friends into the sunken living room with three couches.

The room was filled with plants and crocheted gifts from friends: pillows, blankets, even stuffed animals. Grabbing the blanket off the back of the nearest couch, you plopped down and relaxed into the cushions, wrapping the blanket around your body, “So what’s up then?”

Everyone found their way onto one of the other two couches that were following the square shape in the floor. Your publicist reached inside their bag for a yellow folder, “As I’m sure you’ve heard, the media believes you and Eren are together, and they love it. Your engagement has skyrocketed and this would be perfect to raise interest for your upcoming album. Of course for Eren-,”

“No,” you start, “I don’t care what it could do for me and I don’t care what it could do for him,” while you didn’t know Eren personally, you saw the scandals he was in. He was a known asshole and he treated his fans like shit, like hell you wanted to be tied to him in any way.

Manspreading with his arms on his knees Eren leaned forward, “You’re not the artist you think you are sweetheart, you need me. Go ahead and take the deal and if you’re good I might give you something real,” he smirked suggestively.

“I don’t need shit from you, if anything you’re the one that needs me considering you were caught copying my music. And watch how you speak to me in my house!” you seethed, leaning forward, pointing your finger at him. He laughed, reveling in how he got under your skin.

Holding their hands up and turning towards you and then to Eren, your publicist chimed in, “Ok ok, let’s be cordial. Y/N, this could be really good for your brand and even better for your album. A power couple like you and Eren could lead to a bunch of awards,” they sympathized with you, clasping their hands together as if praying.

Your eyes softened, “No, I understand the pros, but no.”

Your publicist looked at Eren and his manager and shrugged, “Then I guess we’re done here,” standing and putting the folder back in their bag, “ I’ll call you tomorrow about your upcoming album photoshoot then.”

You stood with your blanket still around you and led them to your door, “I’ll be waiting then,” your publicist was first to walk out, glancing at you supportively, then Eren’s manager who gave a short ‘nice to meet you’ before scurrying out. Lastly, Eren walked out turning to look you up and down causing your lip to lift in disgust.

His finger curled under your chin, “You know where to find me when you realize you need a man in your life. Call me and I’ll make room for you on my roster.”

You snatched your head away and glared at him as he swaggered out of your house, slamming your door as soon as he was out of the way.

It’s been over an hour since they left and you were still fuming, so much so, you couldn’t write or finish the sandwich and soup you doordashed from Panera. You were antsy and your adrenaline ran high. On a whim, you picked up your phone and texted Levi, ‘Hey I know we said 7 but can I come early, I just don’t want to be alone right now, I won’t distract you,’ you fidgeted with the beads along your waist, looking at your messages.

Two minutes later, ‘Yea, by the way, you’d be a welcome distraction,”

A bright smile overtook your face at the message. You grabbed your stuff and were out of the house and in your car within 5 minutes.

You walked into his studio, and up to his chair, squeezing his shoulder to let him know you were here. Before you could pull away he placed his hand on yours and squeezed, giving it a short rub with his thumb. He looked up over his shoulder at you, eyes serious but concerned before turning back to his screen and placing his hand back on the keyboard. The simple act relaxed you more than blunt after a long day. The leather couch groaned when you sat on it as you busied yourself with your phone.

It wasn’t until the door to the studio closed that you finally looked up from your phone to find Levi staring at you. He felt the urge to come sit by you on the couch but instead settled for, “Come show me what you got.”

You sauntered over, stood before him, and presented your journal. You flipped through the pages, choosing to explain your most recent song and your ideas for the melody.

Levi listened intensely, feeling the emotions behind your words and actualizing the song in his head so he’d have an idea of where to start. He admired the light behind your eyes and the vibrancy behind your movements as you explained what you wanted to convey. When you finished you looked at him expectantly, vulnerable.

He could see it all over your body, beckoning him for some form of reassurance, advice, anything, “It’s not your usual song,” he teases, “but I like it, I think I see where you want to go with it,” he adds.

Internally you let out a sigh of relief before pausing, “Wait, what do you mean it’s not my usual song?” you ask wearily.

“It’s about unrequited love, your usual songs are about being in love or having something more casual. I’m to use to you singing about about not getting the person,”

he explains. It was hard to believe you even felt the need to write about someone who didn’t reciprocate your affections. Who would be dense enough to not see or outright ignore your advances.

You scratch the back of your head, you weren’t expecting him to say that, “Yea, well, it’s been weighing on me heavily recently, like you said earlier I should leave it all in the booth right,” you say softly.

“Not saying that singing doesn’t help but maybe you should talk to the person, if they’re still in your life,” he studied you as you thought over his words. Watching the gears turn in your head as you bit your bottom lip.

“I see what you’re saying,” you looked down at your hands, rubbing them together before taking a deep breath, “I like you Levi,” you looked back up at him brightly.

Did he hear you right, was this a joke, a publicity stunt. His entire body froze, he was locked in this moment in time, unsure of what his next move should be. His eyes were widened slightly but he was otherwise unreadable.

Feeling emboldened, just ready to get your feelings off your chest you continued, “At first it was strictly professional but then I really started to admire your work. I really like the way you understood me through my music, it’s almost like I never have to say much for you to understand where I’m at. I’m know I’m saying a lot right now and if you’re uncomfortable or need me to leave-,”

He cut you off, putting a hand on your cheek and shaking his head, “No don’t leave,” he coughed into his other hand, “I- I’ve felt the same way about you since I’ve met you,” his heart was beating out of his chest but he moved his hand to truly cup the side of your face, eyes looking at you peacefully despite the anxiety.

You cover his hand with yours, “Really?” still unsure if he felt the same way.

Sensing your state, Levi pulled your chair closer to his, slotting your legs in between his, “Really. I know I didn’t say anything sooner, but if you’ll let me, I’d like to make it up to you.”

You nod, feeling your heart swell. You wet your lips and glance at his before meeting his steely gaze. He closes the distance between you two, using his hand to bring your head closer, placing a soft, sweet kiss on your lips before pulling back to stare at you open mouthed. You push back into the kiss, locking your hand behind his neck. The kiss is openmouthed, slow, and filled with all the unsaid words he needed to express to you.

Levi bites your bottom lip and drags his tongue along the length of yours, twirling it and mapping the inside of your mouth. You grip the strands of his hair and bring your legs up and over to rest on top of his thighs. He worms his hands under your thighs to stand up, bringing you with him. Instinctively, your thighs wrap around his waist still kissing him. Without opening his eyes he walks over to the couch placing you down to lean over you.

You break the kiss to gasp for air, choosing instead to grab his face and pepper him with quick kisses all over his face. He hums sweetly, squeezing your hips and relishing in the warmth of your body before pulling back to look at you, “Do you want to do this? We could stop here,” tone serious but his gaze was fervent.

Eyelids heavy you say, “I want this Levi, I want you,”

He went to kiss your neck, licking and sucking in the places that caused you to whine and squirm the most. Being underneath him was too much and you couldn’t help but grind your hips up onto his bulge, moaning at his hardness and causing him to gasp into your neck. He pulled your hips to meet his, helping you as he trailed kisses down your neck to your chest, savoring the sweet taste of your body.

You lift your shirt off, throwing it, completely forgotten, allowing him to trail wet open mouthed kisses while working to unclasp your bra. It unhooks and he slides it down your arms, letting it fall to ground before fondling both of your breasts, eyes staring at you earnestly. He leans down to lick your nipple, pulling the sweetest mewl from you, encouraging him to put your entire nipple in his mouth and tease it, interchanging between nipping, licking, and sucking.

Your eyes flutter closed and you rest your hands in his hair letting out sighs of pleasure, “Please Levi I need more,”

He releases your nipple with a pop, “Like I said, just like a brat to be ungrateful,” he mocks, “but since you asked so nicely.”

He removed your pants, underwear following. Feeling exposed, you help him strip down to just his underwear, his erection stretching them to the max and precum creating a dark stain. He climbs back on top of you, resuming his taste test down to your navel then going to bruise your thighs with lovebites, watching you writhe and yelp.

Pushing your legs up so your knees were to your side, he finally gave you what you wanted and licked a long strip from your entrance to your clit, stopping there to flick his tongue against the nub, listening to you moan his name softly, your voice so smooth and melodic.

He speeds up, changing the rhythm, savoring the taste of your sweet, tangy, juices gushing out, “I’d wait years if it meant getting to taste you,” he groans into you, eyes closing in bliss, ravishing you like it was the first meal he had in days.

You moan loudly, grabbing his head encouraging him to keep his rhythm, “Fuck Levi, don’t stop.”

Face coated in your slick, he brings up his two fingers to tease your entrance before slipping in, “Wasn’t going to brat,” sending vibrations through your body.

You shuddered and moaned breathlessly when he found the sweet spot, your hole convulsing around his fingers, pushing you towards your peak. Your back arched and you pushed your hips into his face, fiery white rushing through your body.

His free hand rubbed your hip as he cleaned up your cum causing you to whimper from sensitivity. You took his fingers in your mouth, loving the taste of yourself on him before slipping them out.

He pulled away from you, wiping his face with the back of his hand before sliding his underwear down and lining up with your entrance. He stares at you lustfully, cradling your head in his arms, watching your reaction as his dick slips inside, stretching you to a pleasurable fullness. He pulls back out slowly cursing when he notices you watching his dick fill your cunt. He continues with a slow pace, getting hotter when he notices your creamy arousal coating his dick and pooling at its base.

He lifts your legs up, putting them over his shoulders, folding you in half and causing your walls to flutter and squeeze him from the depth of the new angle. He smirks and grunts in response, quickening his pace, drinking in your moans and the way you can’t help but to suck him back in, “Damn Y/N.”

Blood shoots straight to your cunt and you beg him to go harder, wrapping your arms around his neck, fingernails scratching his undercut.

He loops his arm under your shoulder, holding on to it as he pistons into you at a brutal pace. His face contorts and sweat drips down his forehead as he concentrated on trying to make you climax. His hand goes down between you to rub your slippery clit in tantalizing circles.

You moan loudly, only capable of repeating his name mindlessly as the pressure in your stomach builds, “Levi-I’m- I’m-.”

“I know, go ahead sweet girl.”

You come undone, velvety walls crushing him, leaving a trail of frothy white cum covering his pelvis as you contract underneath him. You bring him in for a sloppy kiss, whining into his mouth as he chases his own end, deliciously overstimulating you. His rhythm stutters and he groans into your mouth. You move your hips to meet his thrusts, beckoning him. He moans your name as he explodes inside you, warm cum shooting into you, filling you up.

You break the kiss, look at him and smile, mouth parted breathlessly. He falls on your chest and looks up at you with loving eyes as his hand reaches for your face to caress it.

“Now what am I supposed to tell the public?” you ask lightheartedly, stroking his hair as he rests his face on your boobs.

He chuckles, “All you need to do is confirm the allegations when I come out saying you’re mine,” kissing your sternum.

#LEVI ACKERMAN #levi x black reader #levi ackerman x black reader #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman smut #music industry #aot fic #attack on titan #friends to lovers #shingenki no kyojin

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yankpop · 2 years

Text

Yandere NCT Dream: You lie to them

All copyrights belong to @yankpop (aka me) so do not post/translate my works on any other platforms without my consent/knowledge.

Check more: Masterlist.

Female reader

WARNINGS: Dating/friendship context.

AN: Another Dream reactions, Hope you guys enjoy it 💖

Mark

Mark is super upset that you decided to lie to him. Doesn’t matter if it’s a small and seemingly insignificant lie. It matters the world to him that you decided to break the strong bond of trust he has put on you.

How can he trust you with going out, spending time with all those “friends” of yours and expect you to stay loyal to him when you can’t even be honest with him? It really messes with his head how he’s gonna deal with it cause Mark also wants you to be fully honest on your own and without his pressure.

Eventually he’s gonna resort to confront you about it, on how he’s your friend (for now. Plans to become boyfriend on motion) and that he deserves the truth. Basically, guilt-tripping you into telling him everything.

“You know that I care about you but I’m not gonna accept any of this bullshit. Both of us know that you’re lying right to my face. How can you tell me that your favorite color is blue when you initially told me you hated it?”

Renjun

This boy can’t believe that you just spit a blatant lie to his face, without even thinking twice about it. Renjun takes in every single detail on your face while you tell him whatever lie you decided to tell yet the fact that you remained completely indifferent is what makes him the most incredulous. Don’t you have any respect for him? For his fierce love for you?

He purposely stays silent for a few seconds, with a completely blank face to make you uncomfortable on purpose. Then, the questioning starts. Who are you texting? What’s the relation between you two? Why are you texting them? Why do you keep smiling when texting them? And it goes on and on.

Renjun is not naive, and he definitely knows when you’re lying. He’s your boyfriend after all, it’s his job to know all about you. So, lying to him will not work. Will grill you with endless questions until you slip on a detail and then Renjun proceeds to extract the whole truth out of you.

Even if it ends up ruining a surprise party you were secretly planning for him with his friends

“What do you mean by surprise party? For me? Really? Oh, you should’ve said that before, darling, but it’s okay. I’ll just pretend like I don’t know about it, okay?”

Jeno

Doesn’t know how to react. He literally freezes when he finds out that you’ve been lying to him. On the inside Jeno is deeply hurt by your unloyal attitude but on the outside, he acts cold and indifferent, not even bothering to mask his change of behavior towards you.

How could he not react to the fact that you have a crush on one of his best friends, despite always telling Jeno that you never liked any of his friends. Sure, you’re only a friend but he was in deep love with you and how could you not see that? How could you be so blind not to see how perfect you and him are together?

And the worst is that you like someone else and didn’t share it with him. The only way he found was through a mutual friend that couldn’t keep her mouth shut, letting out your precious secret.

Jeno would be impassive whenever you tried talking to him, giving you short answers until you would finally try to discover why he was so mad at you.

“What’s wrong with me? I don’t know, you tell me. Do you think I’m a complete fool? That I wouldn't find out about you liking Mark hyung?”

Haechan

Oh really, that’s the game you want to play? Because Haechan also knows how to play dirty, and he does it better than anyone. If you think that you can meet friends behind your boyfriend’s back and pretend like nothing happened when you know he absolutely despises them, then you’re dead wrong.

All of the sudden, he’s the one “hiding” secrets from you but still making sure you know that he’s keeping something from you. Secrets messages all the time, constant phone calls where he literally moves to another house division and that only lasts a few mysterious seconds.

All of this just to raise your suspicions and to make you feel insecure. You can think whatever you want about it because Haechan will just act like nothing is happening and you’re the one being a controlling girlfriend.

When you finally break down because of it, he’ll reveal that it was to make you realize how your own betrayal and secrets could harm your relationship. Take it as a lesson to never keep secrets from Haechan, cause he’ll always know.

“You thought I was cheating on you? I wasn’t, but frankly you’d deserve it if I did. Now you know how I felt when you lied to me just to hang out with those so-called friends of yours. From now on, let’s promise no more secrets, okay? Otherwise, I’ll have to take things to another level, and you won’t like that one bit.”

Jaemin

Not the best attitude to have with Jaemin, for sure. The only thing you accomplish by lying to him is making the normally kind and loving boy pissed off. He doesn’t want his beloved princess lying shamelessly to him.

He doesn’t find it amusing at all and honestly, with his dangerously low level of patience Jaemin is not someone you want to mess around with, not even about small details. He expects - no - demands complete honesty from you therefore any lies that might innocently escape from your lips are gonna be severely punished.

He’s gonna spank you until his hand hurts and that only happens much after you lose any remaining energy you had. It better serve as a reminder that Jaemin loves you, but he doesn’t love your lies, so don’t test his patience.

“You’re telling me that you came home late because of work? Funny, because I saw you talking for quite some time with some stranger on the way home, so why lie to me? Seems like my sweet girlfriend has lost her respect for me, huh? Do you really think you can just lie to me? Should’ve thought about that before cause now you’re about to get punished for being a bitch.”

Chenle

Chenle’s not gonna put up with your lies and he makes sure you know that. He’s not gonna pretend like he’s okay with you lying to him, so Chenle gives you a hard cold stare while you keep enrolling with your story on how you can’t hang out with him because you have to attend a distant relative’s wedding when Chenle knows that you don’t have any family besides your parents, so why even bother to make up a lie?

You lying is just as ridiculous as you trying to ditch him.

Sometimes Chenle can swear you don’t have a brain, cause you act so dumb. He prefers to catch you red handed, so he merely accepts your poor excuse and lets you be, just to knock on your door on the supposed wedding day just to catch you there and invite himself to hang out with you in your house.

“Well, well, well. Look who’s here at home. Shouldn’t you be at some wedding function? Pfft, I knew from the start that you were lying cause you’re a horrible liar so don’t even bother to try again in the future.”

Jisung

Jisung is more hurt than anything. He can’t even believe that you’d do such a horrible thing to him, leaving him completely confused about why you just lied to him. It really messes with his head and he just can’t figure it out.

It’s such a random lie that Jisung simply can’t wrap his head around the fact that you lied. Why would you say that you hated pizza when you always ordered it when the two of you would go out? It’s a bizarre thing, for sure. Could it be a girl's thing to lie about the most trivial things to their boyfriends?

Jisung will definitely talk about it with his hyungs, learning that he needs to stay more attentive to you and your tastes and preferences.

“Oh, wait, you hate pizza? Really? But, for real? I really thought you liked it!”

Tags:

@mwitsmejk

#yandere nct #nct yandere #@yankpop #yandere nct dream #yandere nct dream reactions #yandere mark #yandere haechan #yandere jeno #yandere jaemin #yandere renjun #yandere jisung #yandere chenle #yandere scenario #yandere!nct #yandere kpop #kpop yandere

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brighteyedbushybrowed · 2 years

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𝐌𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐧!𝐄𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐉𝐉𝐁𝐀

Hey man I just needed to put this out there fully bc I’ve incredibly briefly talked about this and now I need to make it into headcanons.

FEATURES SPOILERS FOR JJBA BELOW THE KEEP READING LINE

So you introduce him to the first part of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure (Phantom Blood) because you’ve been wanting him to watch it for a while now due to all the music references in the anime and manga

Obviously this man is willing to try new shows and stuff that you’re interested in at least once so that he can get to know what you like better and maybe even gain a new interest

And you’ve of course told him vaguely that there are music references in the franchise, but not what the references are so he’s intrigued

And then it happens

Dio Brando is introduced

It takes a moment for the name to actually register in Eddie’s brain

And then he’s like “holy shit wait they said Dio!”

And he then knows what you meant by musical references and makes an effort to try and keep track of all the music references

Obviously Dio is his favourite music reference in Phantom Blood, although he does also appreciate REO Speedwagon being an important part of Phantom Blood as well as Battle Tendency

Eisidisi (AC/DC) has him confused at first because they don’t say it as AC/DC so you have to explain to him the changes they make in the dub and subtitles to avoid copyright issues

Dio ends up becoming his favourite Jojo villain when he returns in Stardust Crusaders

Not just because of the band reference but because he finds Dio to make a great villain

He yells when they kill off Avdol for real at the end of that part of the franchise

“C’mon, man! Wasn’t killing him off once enough? I call bullshit!”

Diamond Is Unbreakable’s main villain of Kira becomes another firm favourite of Eddie’s

Some of the localised Stand Names are kinda funny to him, especially if he’s high

Green Tea instead of Green Day really makes him laugh as well as Spicy Lady instead of Spice Girl

Once he’s watched all of the anime that’s available, you show him the manga of what hasn’t been animated and released yet

He fucking loses it when you tell him Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap becomes Filthy Acts At A Reasonable Price (as he should because that localisation is hilarious imo)

He starts singing Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap but instead of singing those words he replaces them with Filthy Acts At A Reasonable Price and it’s absolute chaos

Especially when he gets the guitar out and plays along as he sings it

In terms of his favourite Jojo, I think he’d either be a Jotaro, Joseph, or Jolyne kind of guy

I guarantee you he would be getting you both to do a couple’s cosplay of Jojo characters for Halloween. I’m thinking Joseph and Suzie Q or Jospeh and Caesar Zeppeli

#stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson headcanons #headcanons #eddie munson x reader #jojo's bizarre adventure #jjba #modern!eddie

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podracerbarrelroll · 1 year

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How to ditch subscription music apps and build your own library (mostly) for free

This post is brought to you by the most recent update to the Amazon music app which no longer lets me, as a Prime subscriber, download individual songs or albums. I now either have to download “playlists” or pay an extra subscription fee for Amazon music unlimited. Since I was only using Amazon’s app because I didn’t have to pay anything extra, I ultimately decided not to put up with their bullshit and to go back to the old ways, e.g., building my own music library that no corporation can randomly decide to take away from me.

If you grew up in the pre-internet, burgeoning-but-not-ubiquitous-internet, or pre-smartphone era like me, the following steps will be a blast from the past, so this post is not exactly for you. It’s for Kids These Days™ who may not remember a pre-algorithm, pre-subscription service internet in the same way, or just anyone who doesn’t know you can do this. Remember, one man’s time knife is another man’s Chris Fleming.

So, how do you get music for free?

Use your public library

Check out CDs

Rip them using Windows Media Player, which comes standard with windows computers

That’s it. Now you can save and back up the .mp3 files wherever you want, and you have them forever and ever. I recently ripped music from a CD I copied and burned onto a new disc back in high school, uploaded the mp3 files to Google drive, and downloaded them onto my phone. I paid zero dollars for that, and I now have that album forever.

Ok, so how do I do that?

I’m glad you asked.

1. Insert a CD in the disc drive. (I know a lot of new laptops don’t come with a disc drive--I’ll address this later)

2. Go to the Windows start menu and find Windows Media Player. (If you have a mac, use itunes or whatever, I’m sure it’s similar)

3. Find the CD on the menu on the left-hand side of Windows Media Player. It looks like this.

4. At the top of the screen, go to “rip CD”. If you don’t want all of the songs, uncheck the ones you don’t want to rip. It should now look like this.

5. When it’s done, go to your music folder and find the artist and album. Here are the .mp3 files. You can connect your phone directly to your computer to transfer the files, or you can upload them to Google drive or your cloud storage of choice and then download them onto your phone.

6. From there, the .mp3s should load automatically and play in the music player app of your choice. I use Musicolet because it doesn’t have ads.

Is this legal? Honestly, that’s a bit of a grey area. Technically, only the copyright owners can make reproductions of their work barring exceptions for fair use, but the real trouble does not come when you copy a work, but when you redistribute it. If you save this from a hard copy to your own computer or phone, who’s ever gonna know? Basically, it’s legal enough to get away with, and legal enough that no one will care. This is how back in the pre-CD days, people recorded songs off the radio onto cassette tapes, and how my parents saved all of the James Bond movies from a TV movie marathon by recording them to VHS tapes on the VCR.

Is this ethical to the artist? It’s as ethical as checking out their CD to listen to it on a CD player and then return it. The library already purchased their music legally, and checking out the CD to rip it is literally no different than checking out the disc to play it in a CD player. The more times something has been checked out, the more likely the library is to replace it if it wears out and gets ruined.

Will the library get mad at me / figure out what I’m doing? Emphatically no. They don’t give a shit. Checking out a bunch of CDs improves their circulation rates, which is good for your local library system as a whole, because that’s something they bring to their governing bodies to show that people are still using the library and that they still need funding.

What if the library doesn’t have the album I want? You can try getting it through interlibrary loan, requesting the library purchase it (a lot of libraries have forms for that), or just buying that album yourself if you want it that badly. CDs cost roughly $10-$25 each, less if they’re used, which is the equivalent of like 1-2 months of spotify depending on what tier you use. Compare that to having the music you want forever without having to pay a monthly fee.

My laptop doesn’t have a disc drive. Neither does mine. I bought a USB disc player from Amazon for like $20. Your library might also have one they’d let you use, although they might not have ones to check out and take home.

I don’t have a computer. Your library does. They’re free to use, and I can almost guarantee they have PC desktops running Windows. They may not have a disc drive, in which case you can [see last paragraph].

This would be great if I could actually get to the library / afford a disc player / had a phone, etc. Yes, I’m assuming several things here, including that you have a phone, can get to your public library, and (if you refer to the title of this post) that you are the kind of person who can pay for spotify or another streaming app. I’m also American, and I don’t know how well all of this applies to other countries. However, this is the most affordable and most accessible solution out there ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I don’t have the time for this and would rather just keep paying for spotify. That’s fine, and I’m honestly not judging you. I buy a lot of pre-cut vegetables from the store because I don’t have the fucking time to peel and chop carrots. My mom would say that’s a waste of money, but I’m paying for the convenience.

Lol I’m just gonna pirate shit. Cool, have fun. Just please keep your pirating to mega-rich artists who are already set for life and not struggling people putting their shit out on soundcloud, ok?

How do I get new music recs without suggestions? Listen to the radio. Look up music you hear in movie soundtracks. Get recs from friends. Go to YouTube (using ublock origin for Firefox so you don’t get ads) and use their algorithm. There are ways beyond the personalized playlist spotify gives you.

This seems like it takes a lot of time and effort. If you have no music to begin with, yeah, then it’s going to take some time to build your library. But, as I keep saying, the benefits are that you get to curate your own experience and that you get to have this music forever. Once you already have most of what you want set up, it’s going to take a lot less effort to add new albums or songs here and there as you discover them. In this modern hellscape of profit-seeking and algorithms, I will keep peddling the value of curating your own experience and getting shit for free.

#music #libraries #spotify #algorithms

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serotonincemetery · 1 year

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Hello! I’m Serotonin.Cemetery! I came over here from Wattpad to share my work!

I am a fanfic writer who has very unhealthy hyperfixations that lead to no sleep as well as a moderate caffeine dependency.

Uhhhhh, are boundaries a thing on here? eh I’m putting ‘em anyways.

You can call me Sero or Nin

(Or Mars, yk who you are one singular person ily /p)

I go by He/Him

please do not refer to me as “she” or “they”

I am transgender, don’t let that differentiate me from other people.

Don’t be creepy or weird, have some decency.

Following that ^ any NSFW adult photo accounts will be blocked. Though I will make the decision at some point to start writing NSFW but for now its a no. For the same reason of “dont be weird” I do not want to be engaged in such content. But if others do, I don’t control them.

(Though if any nsfw blogs((non bot)) like my non-nsfw content, I take that as a compliment because them mfs have HIGH expectations)

If you request something, I reserve the right to say no.

If my asks are closed. They are closed. No asking and trying to get it done. They are closed for a reason.

MY ASK BOX IS OPEN! I LOVE TALKING TO YOU GUYS!! (idk how to ask this but also just describing things? I like hearing people explain things and describe objects due to the fact I struggle to do so)

Are a proshipper, incest shipper (includes adoptive and step siblings), pedo shipper, anti LGBTQIAP+, misgender trans/enby folks, gatekeep labels, racist, sexist, anti-semitic, islamophobic, fatphobic, ableist otherwise bigoted (includes neurodiversity, body shaming, MAPS/PEARS)

✅Platonic relationships

✅Romantic relationships

✅Fluff

✅Angst

✅Prompts

✅Family Dynamics

✅Gore

✅Requests

✅Poly Relationships

✅POC

✅Disabilities

❌Smut

❌Limes

❌R*pe

❌Addition of an OC in an “X Reader”

❌Sexualizing of minors

❌Things that go against people’s boundaries

❌Things where two characters are different versions of one character and those two being shipped. Idk what its called but I absolutely refuse to write that.

❌Fem aligned Readers

‼️Most, if not all my works will now be done in AMAB perspective, and/or Gender Neutral perspective.

‼️I AM A NWLNW FANFIC BLOG ANY WORKS WITH A FEM ALIGNED READER ARE FROM YEARS AGO WHEN I IDENTIFIED AS FEM ALIGNED.

‼️I reserve the right to say “No” to an ask/request.

‼️Any NSFW asks will be met with an immediate “NO” As well as any asks that violate my boundaries

‼️ I know that y’all younger people don’t listen to the MDNI thing or “Dont read if under 18”. So just for the sake of simple hospitality. Don’t interact with my work. All my work is 16+ at minimum

ALL WORKS ARE ALSO FROM MY OFFICIAL WATTPAD. PLEASE DON’T COPYRIGHT OR ACCUSE ME OF PLAGIARISM

Mental Health Helpline

1 (877) 303 2642

Addiction Services Helpline

1 (886) 332 2322

Distress/Suicide Hotline

1 (780) 482 4357

Victim Services

1 (780) 968 7272

Sexual Assault Centre

1 (780) 423 4121

Child Abuse Hotline

1 800 387 5437

Kids Help Phone

1 800 668 6868

MY TAGS:

serotonin.writes

Where you will find my fics

serotonin.rants

Where you will find my bullshit

serotonin.talks

Where you will find my ask responses or any other thing when I engage with you

serotonin.doodles

Where you find my art. I promise I can do art, I take advanced art classes, I just typically have an empty brain

PFP MADE BY Humesteria ON PICREW

You can find that here

My masterlist is currently under reconstruction because this app decided to be a prick

My requests are open!

None yet!!

#writing #boundaries #fanfiction #serotonin.writes #serotonin.talks #serotonin.rants

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mighty-poop · 1 year

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Imma nag about Jkr and Hp some more because I can’t believe how upset I am about this and i need an outlet.

People who want to buy the HP game: I have no sympathy for you, you’re not a good person.

“You can’t just call all people who just want to play a video game evil” you literally have no excuses anymore!

JKR is transphobic. That is a fact, it is not up for debate. She blatantly admits it. She fits the definition in any shape and form. To her, every transgender person is just another lying rapist, somehow trying to trample on women’s rights. It doesn’t matter if the transgender person is male, female, neither or both, adult or child, we are all evil in her eyes. And if it was up to her, we’d be thrown in jail for daring to look gender-non-conforming. She’s literally advocating for that to happen right now!

She’s also freely spreading that hate to anyone who is dumb enough to listen to her. Attacks on trans people, and specifically trans women, has gone up since she started openly spewing her bullshit. That whole bathroom discussion should’ve stopped YEARS ago. She’s THE advocate for terf ideology which has been proven to be harmful to not only trans people but cis people as well.

Most people are aware of this. Everyone who doesn’t live under a rock have SOME semblance of her stance on all this. And you openly admitting that you still think she’s great and that you support her, makes you a transphobe. That’s also not an opinion, that’s a fact. That’s as true as 2 + 2 makes 4. If you support JKR, knowing what she stands for, you’re a transphobe. You’re evil.

Does that make you evil and a transphobe if you consume her content?

it depends on which content and how.

Buying the official merch, streaming the movies, buying the books brand-new, is all harmful. HP is JKR’s intellectual property and will remain so until 70 years after she’s dead. Every time you spend money on anything with the ‘wizarding world’ and ‘warner brothers’ stamp on it, a percentage of that money goes straight to JKR. Again: not an opinion. That’s how copyright laws works.

Knowing this, if you still spend money on JKR properties, you’re either very susceptible to capitalism or a transphobe.

Buying fanwork from etsy and consuming or creating fan content which is not sponsored by the wizarding world brand or warner brothers is less harmful, because JKR doesn’t see a single cent from that. But it is still harmful in a more metaphysical way. You’re keeping HP relevant, keeping it mainstream. The best way for JKR’s influence to die out, is if she’s no longer relevant. That means HP disappears from the mainstream.

Does this make you a transphobe? Honestly, no. HP has been part of people’s lives for decades. I personally believe it will never NOT be relevant or mainstream until most of my generation has bit the dust. Also, I think it’s psychotic to expect everyone to erase a part of themselves, which is what HP is for a lot of people. More than just JKR worked on the movies and on the old games. HP has always been more than JKR, even though she’s doing her hardest to make you believe otherwise. So no, and this IS an opinion, I don’t think you’re evil for consuming fan-content and wanting to keep the nostalgia bubble. I’m in a place where any HP content makes me feel physically sick, and that’s not a solution either.

Are you evil and transphobic for wanting to play the new game?

……. Yeah.

Like I said, what could POSSIBLY be your excuse? For the nostalgia? The game isnt even out yet. If you’re nostalgic, play the old EA games. In support of JKR? That means you’re a transphobe, we’ve been over this. To support the game devs? They’ve already been paid, dumbass. People in the corporate creative industry get paid while they’re working on the creative content. It’s like saying actors only get paid after they win an oscar or smthn, it doesn’t work like that. Plus, this will look great on their resume and portfolio, they’ll find work VERY easily after this. But the story and gameplay looks so fun? Really? The story of your playable character having to stop the goblin rebellion because the creatures that coincidentally look like Jewish stereotypes are sick of how the wizards treat them? The game where your playable character looks into their pureblood ancestry to find out if they’re the über-wizard? The wizard game that has only *checks* 26 spells?? That game???? You know you can just play Skyrim again, right? “But I want to be a character in Hogwarts and get sorted just like I always dreamed to be”! Yeah, I want that too! But not at the cost of REAL HUMAN PEOPLE that are in REAL ACTUAL DANGER because of the woman who gets royalties from this 60 dollar game! The woman who will happily take that money and spend it on rightwing activists who would love nothing more than to shoot trans people execution style. You’re basically saying that you getting to live a fantasy is more important than the lives and safety of real living people. That makes you an awful person.

A video game should not be more important to you than the safety of other people. It is literally that simple.

If you support transgender people, if you uberhaupt support any minority group, be it jewish people or poc, the solution is very simple: do not buy the game.

that is it, just don’t spend 60 dollars on a video game. However, some of you react like it’s the end of the world or that we’re demanding your firstborn child or something. I’ll repeat what some terf on tiktok said then: “it’s just a game.” You can 100% skip this one. I guarantee you there will be more.

“What if I pirate it and play it in private and don’t boast about it everywhere?” I mean, sure? It still speaks volumes of your priorities but at least you’re trying? Let’s talk about that main plotline after you’re done, I genuinely wanna know how you feel about it then.

But otherwise? Just take the L and the transphobe pin you so proudly wear and go away.

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theotherackerman · 2 years

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Chapter Three:

------------------------

Mikasa was at war with this story. She grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, uncapping it as she walked back over to her laptop.

Nothing.

Nothing new.

Nothing old.

Just a blank page.

Staring at her.

Mocking her.

If her laptop had a face, she would punch it.

It hadn’t even been this hard to write when Porco and her had divorced. In fact, she wrote chapter after chapter. Not stopping.

Porco entered the haunted house.

He was torn apart by succubus because he doesn’t know how to keep his pants closed.

Too cruel?

Probably.

But I just need to get words on this fucking page or Jean is going to kill me in September.

I was never bad at this before.

Why can’t I write anymore?

Where is my head?

Where is my heart?

I’m starting to think I don’t have one.

I’m guessing Eren is next door just cranking out his next book.

Some lovey bullshit about how love conquers all.

Sadly love does not conquer all.

Especially when you're a soulless black hearted bitch whose ex husband cheated on you with your only friend in Los Angeles and your two best friends have to come pack up all your shit and then move you back in with your uncle. Where everything is hard and your thoughts constantly wander back to that time you walked in and what heart you thought you had shattered on the floor.

Love was a lie.

It would always be a lie.

And then your ex husband calls you and tries to smooth things over. So you say you’re fine with it. You’re not by the way but you want to be the “cool” girl, the “chill” girl so you say you forgive him. You say it’ll be fine.

But it’s not fine.

It’ll never be fine.

Because every time someone flirts with you, you’re reminded of the last time you had someone who “loved” you.

And you remember that love gives that person the power to destroy you.

They always do.

They always will.

Mikasa’s phone went off with a text.

——-

Eren was excited for the book club. He always did well at book clubs.

His backpack was packed with all sorts of promotional material and a bottle of wine. That always went over well with book clubs.

Today, he wouldn’t have to think about writing his third book or the awful feelings left from the mess his father had made of his life.

He could just focus on his new book.

Levi had sent a text with the address of his house which Eren entered into the gps as he got into his car.

This would be a good day. He just knew it.

—------

Her phone rang. She shouldn't have been surprised to see Porco was calling.

"Your friends seem to forget I still follow them," he replied simply.

"I don't think they forgot."

"Pieck is yelling at me too. Her and Jean getting together is the worst thing that has ever happened."

"I thought the worst thing that has ever happened was you sleeping with Sandra while we were on a break in my bed but I guess that’s changed.”

“Ouch. I deserve that. But you knew she was pregnant. I told you before I told anyone else. Even my mom, my brother. We’ve been divorced for years. I’m allowed to move on with her. I’ve apologized multiple times. I thought we were cool and then you friends started posting that shit.”

“You act like I can control them.”

“Do they know the whole reason we went on a break was because you told me you didn’t believe in love? That you were the one who exited this relationship before it had even happened. Now I have to hear it from Pieck and everyone else.”

“What do you want me to say, Porco? I’m sorry! I told you I’m sorry just as much as you told me. I never once told you I loved you!”

“Then why did you fucking marry me?!”

“I don’t know!”

Silence.

Mikasa swallowed. “I’m sorry. I can’t be what you need. I’ll try to get them to stop. I just….”

“I know. I’m sorry too. I just…..I don’t want it to stress Sandra out.”

“Tell her I say congratulations.”

Porco scoffed.

“I mean it. You…you deserve every happiness and to be with someone who can give you that. Because both know I can’t be what you need.”

“You almost sound like an adult there, Mikasa.”

“Shut up.”

“You know you do too. And I know you don’t believe it or in it, but I did really love you. I just kept hoping that one day you’d look and love me. But you never did. I really hope one day you find someone who makes me believe in love.”

Mikasa snorted a laugh.

“I’m serious. You deserve it, Mikasa. Don’t let anyone tell you anything different, not even yourself.”

Mikasa took a deep breath. “Thank you.”

“And I’ll be the one there, telling you I told you so. I’ll throw you the biggest fucking party on the planet.”

“I’ll post congratulations on my Instagram. Jean wants me to post again. That’ll get them to stop.”

“Why do I feel like you’re going through something more than this? Is there something you’re not telling me?”

Mikasa sighed.

“You know you can still talk to me. Before today, I thought we were still friends.”

“We are. This is just something I have to deal with myself.”

“I understand. But if you need me…”

“I know.”

“Sandra is coming home soon so…”

“Yeah, okay.”

“I’ll tell her I called you and that you say congrats.”

“Okay.”

There was a pause.

“You really do deserve love, Mikasa,” with that Porco hung up.

Mikasa immediately sat down her phone and went straight to the kitchen. She grabbed a bottle of wine from the wire rack that sat on the counter, uncorking, and began to drink directly from the bottle.

——

This good day for Eren was shot the moment he arrived at Hange’s place.

Once he found out that he had a brother, the first thing he did was bring up every social media piece that Zeke Fritz had.

He was blonde, like his mother. Tall like Grisha. Wore glasses like Grisha. He looked more like Grisha than Eren ever would.

And he was standing on the lawn of Levi’s house.

This was his half brother.

His father’s secret.

Grisha’s true heir.

Grisha’s first born.

Eren was going to be sick.

But he had to be professional.

He wasn’t here for Grisha or Dina or Zeke.

He was here because book clubs were what sold romance books. That and social media were the two best markets for him. Since he was failing at the social media part, he could at least suffer through a few hours with Zeke. He could do this. The chance that Zeke even knew who he was low.

Eren took a deep breath as he exited the car. He walked over to the passenger side, unlocked it, and grabbed his backpack plus the bottle of wine. His grip tightened on the bottle as he swung his backpack over his shoulder.

“HANGE! Eren’s here!” Levi yelled as Eren made his way up the driveway.

“Eren?” Zeke asked, looking towards Eren.

His eyes weren’t Grisha’s. They were Dina’s. That awful woman who had shown up at Grisha’s funeral, dropped the bombshell, and ruined Eren’s life.

“Eren who?” Zeke asked Levi.

“Eren Jaeger,” Eren spoke.

Zeke’s eyes widened.

So Zeke knew then.

Grisha had told Zeke about Eren.

He didn’t know how to feel about that.

“Fan of romance novels, Zeke?” Eren dared to say.

Spite. It was pure spite that was fuel Eren right now. Zeke couldn’t say how he knew Eren without outing the fact that Dina was the other woman for years.

“I am, actually. Read all of yours. In fact, it was my dad who gave them to me,” Zeke stated matter of fact.

If Eren hadn’t been there for work, he would have punched his brother at that moment. No, Zeke didn’t get to make Eren feel like the bad guy. Why was he feeling like that at all?

Maybe Eren wouldn’t give this bottle of wine to Hange. Maybe he’d just knock Zeke upside the head with it.

Before Eren could say anything else, his phone went off.

—----------------

Mikasa Ackerman was drunk. She's drunk and she's stumbled into Levi and Hange's house.

Porco.

He was going to have a child.

A child.

She still didn't love him. She had never loved him, she thought maybe with time she would but this….this was something she had never seen coming.

So one bottle of wine turned into more and then she found herself stumbling shoeless to Levi's place.

The book club was happening.

Shit.

It was Friday.

They all looked at her.

Eren sat there. Of course, he was there. Of course, she was drunk. She could fake it. It had to be easy, right? Just fake her sobriety. She'd done it in college, she could do it here.

She swallowed as Eren stared at her.

"Hi," she gave an awkward wave.

"Oh. Right, you sent the text you weren't feeling well and needed a ride home, right?" Eren said as he jumped to his feet.

Mikasa just stared at him.

"Sorry, everyone. Mikasa's got the stomach flu. Nice to meet you all," Eren ushered her out the door.

He eventually passed her and walked to his car. He opened the door for her.

"Why did you help me?" She asked as she stood there.

"Because that man on the couch is my half brother and I'm not ready to deal with that."

"Well, shit. Thanks. I can walk home."

"You'll end up in a ditch."

"I've been living here for two years, Eren. I know how to get home from here."

"Uh huh. You'll end up in a ditch or worse. I'm not leaving you here on the road. Come on, let me take you home."

"How did you know I was drunk?"

"I saw you on campus. You always get this red flush when you drink."

"I do not!"

"You do."

"Did you pay that much attention to me, Eren Jaeger?"

"I did. Too bad you didn't do the same. Now come on, get in. I'll take you home. I promise. That's it. I won't even ask why you're drunk."

Mikasa looked back at the house.

"Okay," she answered before she got inside Eren's car.

———-

First stop had been to some hamburger place that Mikasa had insisted would sober her up. Eren had a feeling it was a bad idea but he wasn’t going to argue. He was starving. He had tried to pay but Mikasa had insisted.

Drunk Mikasa was normally not sad. Eren remembered her drinking in college. They had some friends in common so they frequent most of the same parties.

As she lay on the hood of his car, Eren wondered why he had never got up the nerve to dance with her except for that one time.

Oh. Right.

Because she was beautiful and he thought she hated him.

“Did you hate me in college?”

Mikasa turned towards him. “What? No!’

“Oh. It’s just that….they way you talked about my writing, I thought you hated me.”

Mikasa snorted. “You really want to have this conversation while I’m drunk?”

“Is there a better time to have it? It’s either that or what’s bothering you.”

Mikasa picked up the coke she had ordered and took a drink. “I talked about your writing that way because I was jealous. You had a way of making every situation better. You were like this fairy tale prince.”

“Yeah, I heard you said that.”

“It’s not a bad thing. It’s a compliment. You know the prince always saves the day, gets the girl, and rides out into the sunset.”

“And who are you in this scenario?”

“I’m not in fairy tales.”

“Right. You’ve got the dark stuff covered,” Eren rolled his eyes.

“Did you just roll your eyes at me?”

“Yeah. You always act like you’re too good for a happy ending.”

Mikasa sat up. “I’m not too good.”

“Could have fooled me.”

“Oh! And I suppose being all sunshine and lollipops isn’t a cover for something! At least you already know how it’s going to end! The couple rides off into the sunset, they have three kids, and picket white fence! The end! The hard part for you is over!”

“Are you saying writing romance is easy?”

“When you have the ending figured out, the rest is easy.”

“Bullshit! And you think writing the same depressing thing over and over isn’t easy? Your writing is always angst, angst,sad emo shit, and more angst! Just kill all the characters off one by one and have them make every wrong decision. No one is happy! The end!”

“I bet you can’t write it. Because if it was easy, why don’t you write it?”

“I will!”

Mikasa scoffed.

“Let’s see you write a romance novel!”

“Maybe I will! Since all the hard work of the ending is already done for me!”

Somehow, during all their arguing, they had moved closer to one another. Eren’s hand was inches away from Mikasa’s.

“I…uhh….” The words wouldn’t come to him. He could see her staring at his lips.

He wanted to kiss her.

Right here.

Right now.

“I think I’m going to be sick,” Mikasa jumped down off the hood of the car and proceeded to puke into the grass next to the car.

Out of instinct, Eren pulled her short hair back out of her face.

After she was done, she looked up at him. Eren noticed how vulnerable and depressed she looked. Something more was going on with Mikasa.

He desperately wanted to know what but it wasn’t his place. Maybe this friendship between them could become a real friendship. Not just the awkward neighbor or friend of a friend.

“Come on,” he said as he took a hold of her hand and walked her to his passenger side door. “I’ll take you home.”

————-

Mikasa fell asleep on the ride home.

Eren went to check if her door was unlocked. It wasn’t.

He walked back over to Mikasa and saw keys on the floor next to her shoeless feet. He picked them up, unlocked the front door, and then went back to the car.

He simply carried her inside and laid her down on the couch in her living room.

When he went to leave, her hand grabbed his just for a moment.

Was Mikasa awake?

Then she let go and rolled over.

Eren stood there for a moment, just watching over her. He randomly remembered Twilight and felt like Edward was not something he ever wanted. So he exited her house and locked the door behind him.

——-

Mikasa was in hell.

There was this annoying ringing noise that kept repeating over and over.

Her head was pounding.

Wine.

Burgers.

Throwing up.

And then nothing.

She had thrown up in front of Eren.

Her eyes shot open.

She grabbed her phone that she had left on the edge of the couch yesterday.

Levi was calling.

She quickly answered it.

“If you didn’t pick up, I was coming to see if you were murdered.”

“Not murdered. Just hung over.”

“Yeah, I could tell. Funny how Eren tried to cover for you. Like we didn’t know.”

“Is that what you called for?”

“Yes…and no. What’s got you so drunk you’re wandering around town without shoes?”

“Can we not talk about this right now?”

Her head was starting to pound harder.

“This is punishment.”

“Why?”

“Because you were dumb and now you must pay the price.”

“Which is?”

“Talking to me on the phone while I pretend to look for a book.”

“Who’s harassing you now?”

“That stupid Floch kid keeps saying we have a book in stock after I told him the website is wrong.”

“I thought Hange fixed all the inventory problems.”

“They did. I just don’t like this kid.”

“Levi!”

“What? He gets on my nerves.”

“You can’t just not sell something to someone because you don’t like them personally!”

“Sure, I can. I’m doing it right now.”

“There is something seriously wrong with you.”

“He does not need a first edition signed copy.”

“Of what?”

“I don’t know. I wasn’t paying attention. Whenever he walks in, I completely tune out whatever he’s saying.”

Mikasa shook her head. “You can’t run a business that way.”

“Too late.”

“You know every year you get closer to being the grumpy old man who yells at people to stay off of his lawn.”

“I already do that.”

“Since when?!”

“Since those bratty kids trampled Hange’s roses and knocked all of the cherry blossoms off. “

“Who did that?”

“I don’t know. Some high schoolers.”

“So how long are you going to keep me on this phone?”

“Until he gets annoyed and leaves or Petra comes and finds me.”

“You’re horrible.”

“Are you really okay with Porco having a kid?”

Mikasa sighed. She should have known that was the real reason Levi was calling her.

“Yes. I am. Levi, you already know. He wasn’t the one for me.”

“Oh. I was aware the moment I met him. I was just waiting for you to figure that out.”

“Thanks for that.”

“Hey. You’ve got to make your own mistakes. I can’t live your life for you.”

“I wouldn’t be opposed to that.”

“We all have to go through it. I’ve made mistakes. Kenny has. You have to too. Otherwise, you won’t be living your life. You’ll just be existing.”

“That’s not sounding too bad right now.”

“It’ll get easier. Shit, here comes Petra. I’ll call you later.”

The line went dead.

Mikasa laughed.

————-

Eren cleaned out the rest of the master bedroom.

All important things besides the bed had already been taken out. There were two lamps that each sat on two bedside tables. Eren figured he could leave them with the house. There had been some make up left behind that promptly went into the trash. He wasn’t sure why Dina kept her make-up in the bedside table but he couldn’t bring himself to think about it.

In the other that had clearly belonged to Grisha, Eren found a bunch of coins, a pack of cigarettes, a lighter, a pair of spare glasses, pens, and paper clips. He held the glasses in his hand for a moment.

He considered breaking them.

Just out of frustration and anger.

How dare Grisha live this double life.

How dare he keep an older brother from him.

Grisha just got to pretend that everything was okay and that he didn’t have this whole secret life that Eren knew nothing about.

It wasn’t okay.

It would never be okay.

But Eren couldn’t bring himself to break him.

He found himself sinking down to his knees, choking back the tears.

This was all he had left.

Glasses.

This cabin.

That was it.

Carla had removed most of Grisha’s things after the funeral. He didn’t know what had happened to them. He didn’t ask and she didn’t tell.

Eren got back to his feet.

He threw out the cigarettes and lighter along with the pens and paper clips. He started a donation pile where he put the glasses.

The tables and lamps would go with the house when he sold it.

Eren couldn’t go through the dressers today. That was too much for him.

Besides, he needed to attempt to write.

He made his way downstairs to the kitchen. He could see Mikasa in the other house, sitting at her own kitchen table that faced his house.

She looked up from her computer as he sat.

Mikasa gave him a wave which he returned. Then she stood up and disappeared into the other part of her house.

Eren stared at his computer as it started up. He happened to look up as Mikasa was walking back carrying a notepad.

THANK YOU FOR LAST NIGHT was written on it.

Eren smiled before nodding.

She turned the page. WE SHOULD KEEP THE BET.

Eren considered it before holding up a finger. He dashed over to his backpack and pulled out a notebook.

WHAT BET?

YOU WRITE A DARK NOVEL, I WRITE A ROMANCE.

WHAT DOES THE WINNER GET?

Mikasa considered it for a moment. WHAT DO YOU WANT?

Eren considered writing to you for a good moment.

YOUR PRAISE.

The next page that Mikasa held up was clearly a phone number. CALL ME.

Eren laughed as he took his phone out of his pocket. He dialed her number.

“I already gave you that. Remember?”

“Vaguely.”

“No, but seriously. We should do this. I think it might get us out of this slump. We each write a different novel, send it to our editors and then see who gets published.”

“I have a feeling that our editors would not like that.”

“Why? Because they’re rivals? Look, Jean has been all over me to post more on social media. So whoever wins has to promote the other’s book.”

Eren thought about it.

It couldn’t be that hard.

What did he have to lose?

“Well, I know nothing about writing that emo shit.”

“Like I know about romance but it can’t be that hard, right?”

Eren snorted. “That’s what you think now.”

“Okay, fine. I’ll teach you to tap into your other feelings.”

“And I’ll teach you about romance then.”

“How are you going to do that?”

Eren paused. How was he going to do that? Take her out on dates? Would she even like that?

“We do research,” Eren finally said. “I’ll take you out on cheesey dates and you can….take me wherever you go.”

“Just for research, right?”

Eren swallowed, “right.”

“Okay. Let’s start next week.”

“Okay. I should get back to cleaning up.”

“Okay.”

“Bye.”

Eren ended the call. He walked out of the kitchen and leaned up against the wall in the hallway.

He was so screwed. How was he supposed to go out on a date with Mikasa fucking Ackerman and not fall any more in love with her?

—----------------

There’s a comfort to misery that you won’t understand unless you experience it. There’s something about the freedom to feel horrible and just look back into all of those horrible things.

She was tired.

She was so very tired.

She had been fighting all of her life and for what?

She was not closer to freedom today than he was yesterday.

She wasn’t close to anything.

She was just here with trauma.

Loads and loads of trauma that no matter how much therapy she went to, how much alcohol she drank, it was still there.

She often wished that she wouldn’t wake up the next day.

Maybe there was only freedom in death.

Maybe that moment where you’re right on the edge of life and death…..

No.

Death wasn’t the sweet release she begged for.

It was permanent.

Stationary.

Forever.

There was no freedom in that.

Freedom lied only in choice.

This was the first step towards her freedom.

She looked back at his home where her family had been.

No more.

No more would he be trapped there.

She would be free.

She took a step forward then a step back. She turned around, leaving the house forever.

She was finally free.

——-

It was the most depressing ending Eren had ever read.

Why had read that whole story only for the main character to walk away from everything she fought for?

Eren ran a hand through his hair.

He looked over at the clock in the living room. He still hadn’t bought sheets for the guest bedroom. It was 3:00 am.

He’d been up writing for some long that he lost track of time.

He hadn’t expected to like Mikasa’s book.

He didn’t think the ending would weigh so heavy on him.

After hearing Mikasa talk about his books, he had to read hers.

Was it too late to text Mikasa?

She was probably asleep.

He shouldn’t wake her.

Yet he found himself very much wanting to talk to her about it.

It could wait, he reminded himself.

He stood up and stretched before going out back.

On the patio next door, in the light of the candle, he could see Mikasa. She was just sitting there, staring out into the woods.

It was funny how he had thought of her now here she was.

“Couldn’t sleep?” Eren asked.

It must have startled her as she jumped.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you,” Eren apologized.

“It’s fine. I’m just not used to anyone being out here besides me.”

“I can go back inside.”

“No, really. You’re fine. I mean you’re not bothering me. And no, I couldn’t sleep.”

“Any particular reason?”

“Besides the fact that my ex husband is having a kid with the woman he cheated on me with and I’m saying I’m okay with it to all of my friends?”

“He cheated on you?”

“Yeah. He did.”

“What the fuck is wrong with him?”

“Nothing…I just….I didn’t love him. He knew that going into it.”

“Then why did you marry him?”

“Because I thought I would love him. I thought maybe you know…I like this guy more than anyone else I’ve ever met. Maybe eventually it’ll turn into love. But it never did. Outside of sex, we didn’t really do many couplely things. We never held hands or went on real dates. We were just kind of existing. I’m sorry. You don’t need to hear this.” Mikasa stood up to go inside.

But Eren didn’t want her to leave. No, he wanted to hear her out.

“Carly checked all the boxes on what a wife should be. She was beautiful. We met at the same age my parents did. There was some other stuff but it all kind of faded away for me. I…I don’t think I never loved her. I loved the idea of her. I probably would have married her if my dad hadn’t died. But things were bad, things are bad. She couldn’t handle it. I don’t blame her.”

Mikasa towards him until she got to the railing of the deck. She pulled a pack of cigarettes out of her pocket and her lighter. She reached across the gap between the two houses. Eren took a cigarette out before producing his own lighter. Mikasa took her own cigarette, lighting it before shoving both the pack and lighter into her pocket.

As Eren took a drag, he couldn’t help but look at her.

She had seemed so sure of herself in college.

She had been a different person.

Then again, he had been too.

So they stood there, in a comfortable silence smoking and watching the woods behind their cabins.

#emotional kaleidoscope #my writing

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havnblog · 2 months

Text

AI Is Just Different

The discussion around the ethics and legality surrounding AI has been a constant the last year — and it’s culminating in some important trials that’s coming up.

I won’t go into the entire thing here — I just want to focus on a specific argument that I often hear when it comes to the way these large models are trained. It oftes goes something like: «But how is this different from how humans have always been learning and iterating on previous knowledge?» or «The information was available on the open web, so it can be used for anything!».

I think these are terrible arguments.

Humans are allowed into shopping malls.

However, that’s simply not an argument for that cars should be allowed there as well — whether they’re driven by a human or autonomous.

But while it would be «very bad» if someone drove through a mall with their Hummer, it would only be «annoying» if someone did it with their RC car. I’m not saying the opposite (that if humans can do something, machines can’t) — I’m just saying that it’s not an argument, and that we have to evaluate every «machine» for what it is.

Because scale and context matters.

At some point, we decided that cars were a large enough departure from things like bikes or horse and carriage, and that they required their own rules. And today you need a license to drive a car, but not a bike. And while bikes don’t really need speed limits, cars absolutely do because it’s capable of much more. They’re just… different.

I view AI the same way, and that is why I’m a bit annoyed that much of the discussion’s around «ancient» copyright laws written for a different time. I wish we’d just jump straight to what we think is right, and make laws accordingly. 1

Now, I absolutely have issues with copyright laws and how they’re enforced and who they benefit. **But as someone who plays in a small band, I wouldn’t like it if someone took one of our songs and uploaded it to YouTube as their own. At the same time, I wouldn’t mind if a performer learned the song and played it for money on the street — because scale and context matters. **

Could we please evaluate it for what it is?

I just want to get pass «But technically, according to these laws written for something completely different, it might be fair use» and «But humans have done something similar, so these machines should be allowed to do the same at a global scale».

AI ≠ Napster

AI ≠ Humans

Could we please talk more about what we think is fair and what we actually want?

Imagine if someone, at the beginning of the last century, said: «You can’t put the genie back in the bottle — these cars are driving all over the place, we can’t start regulating them now»?

PS: Let me add, that I think AI tools can be immensely useful. I think too many think you have to choose between

being skeptical of the ethics, and think that they’re useless, hallucinating bullshit machines, or

think that they’re useful, and thus must be ethical and right.

But you can mix and match here, people! 👆🏻

I’m not calling for the removal of all AI tools. 2 But we, as a society, can choose which society we want! And if we think these tools are more unethical than useful, we can make them illegal in their current form. And I wish those who argue for why they should be legal would say why, instead of just «Because humans…».

But sadly, even though the problem is global, most of it is decided in a country with about 4% of the world’s population, that doesn’t really seem capable of passing laws at the moment. ↩︎

At least not in this posts! I’m honestly not sure… ↩︎

0 notes

cherimaho · 5 months

Note

I just don’t understand what they thought was going to happen like you can’t just post without settling copyright issues… and now they’ve started another battle with people coming up with bullshit reasoning like the japanese execs being jealous lmao

the thing is that this is not their first rodeo! they've remade japanese shows before (hana yori dango, antique bakery) F4's IP is owned by the same company that owns CM's IP. F4 is only available on Viki for that reason I guess. Now if it's not that company's fault it's probably Square Enix. Which would not surprise me because Square Enix literally gets off to sabotaging Cherry Magic (see: english volume releases) I do not know much about copyright process but I do think there must have been some specification as far as distribution goes 😭

also i know people are mostly joking about the jealousy thing but i really need those fans to calm down because the first two episodes weren't even that good to be acting like that

#trying to keep an open mind since this is a new adaptation but blatant character assassination is unforgivable

0 notes

tender-rosiey · 3 years

Note

Last part! Maybe👀

But the latest post was so pure that I started to tear up😭💕💕💕

Thnx alot it really was a bless and made me smile from the the rough week I had lately🥺❤

Okay lets get down to business~

From giving birth to how they took care of the child to raising him/her or maybe twins👀💕to growing up u can divide it to parts if u want i won't mind😊❤

Same characters Atsushi/Chuuya/Dazai

❥ BSD characters as parents

Includes: Dazai, Chuuya and Atsushi

ᴀ/ɴ: I am really glad you liked it, dear; I am honored that you find my writing as such and I hope everything gets better for you. I hope you like this as well and my apologizes it’s late; this was so heart-warming to write oml 🥺💘

Dazai Osamu:

Dazai would be terrified I tell you

Like what if he does something wrong that leads them down the path he loathes :(

That’s why you reassure him alongside your beautiful baby

Let’s say you had a girl cause I think a girl would help in making dazai be more smiley and affectionate cause you know how most girls when young like affection?

That’s why

Anyways so, the first months of raising said spawn of satan are like hell for our little brunette

I believe that what would happen is that our little girl would see him as the vomiting stop

So like if you fed her and gave her to dazai to help her burp then she will take it as the cue to vomit to which made dazai think she hated him

“But y/n she keeps crying and screaming when I hold her, she must hate me; she never does anything with you.”

One fateful day however he had to take care of his lovely daughter for a whole day

Cause you had enough of the bullshit of the house and decided to go on a hangout with your friends

So let’s see how he dealt with this, she was not accepting of him AT FIRST and he was on the verge of giving up

But dazai then started humming a song and gently cradling her and swaying her in his arms

Your little girl liked his voice and held his finger while he was calming her down and smiled

That made dazai’s day a lot brighter, but he managed to contain his excitement so he doesn’t scare her

And when you came home you found them sleeping and she was in his arms clinging to his chest as strong as she can 🥺

Now cause I am not going through her whole damn childhood I am gonna talk about her first step and first word

THE FIRST STEP HAPPENED WHEN you two were chilling like the good bad parents you are on the couch

And your daughter wanted to join you people cause apparently she was put on the naughty corner due to somehow spilling pink dye in the shampoo of your husband

So like the determined baby she is, she tried crawling but found out it’s taking too long

So she tried copying how you sweeties walk

And she did :D

So when you looked to her side to check up on her, you saw her walking to you with her arms in the air and then pulled dazai by his arms and told him that she is walking

And he whipped his head SO fast you were afraid he would snap his neck

He took lots of photos and videos

Now her first word was basically a competition between you dummies

“She will say dada first!”

“No, she will say mama first!”

“kukida!”

“…”

Great job, darling

And you both lost to a handsome and respectful blonde

Chuuya Nakahara:

S/N means son name btw 😚

“OH MY GOD Y/N HE LOOKS SO HANDSOME!”

chuuya sweetie we don’t scream beside a newborn child and a woman who just gave birth

I honestly think he would be g r e a t with children

Like sometimes he does take care of Q I believe and he gets along fairly well with Kenji

Who wouldn’t get along with kenji

Anyways he would be so excited and proud of the child you gave birth to

And he was basically fangirling

Chuuya and his kid will get along so well, like your baby would just beam whenever chuuya comes home

Also fight me if you think Chuuya Nakahara wouldn’t take millions and billions of photos and videos of his children

A L L OF HIS CHILDREN

Be it eldest, middle or the youngest of them

He views them as treasures that should be valued every single moment

awie, I love soft chu chu

Now onto the memories

THE FIRST STEP

Yes you are only getting the two major events, deal with it you lovely people

As i was saying

THE FIRST STEP HAPPENED WHEN YOU AND CHUUYA WERE IN A MEETING

And your kiddo missed you two :(

So what did he do?

Be a champion like his dad said

Tried his best to walk to the meeting room and he did

Did the guards stop him?

They just went soft and opened the door for him like he is a damn boss

And then you felt something tug at your leg and giggle

I will let you imagine how the rest of the meeting went with chuuya carrying you both excited about his kid’s first step

The first word was not something with a good aftermath for chuuya however—

“Dazai that absolutely and utterly shitty shithead!”

“Shitheath!”

“Shit”

“Shit!”

“NO STOP REPEATING AFTER ME! AT LEAST SAY DADA!”

Cue you entering

“Hey S/N!”

“Shit!”

“WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT?!”

“Dada!”

“CHUUYA NAKAHARA I AM GONNA KILL YOU!”

“Oh shit! Dada!”

Atsushi Nakajima:

Nnnnnn

I believe he would have a girl

Cause he is such a girl magnet

Like kyoka and lucy

Reminds me of midoriya in that aspect

Anyways he would be so nervous to hold her but excited

Like “y/n I wanna hold her so bad but what if I drop her? :(“

He does end up holding her and crying tears of joy

What a cutie <3

Anyhow your daughter would cling to him like a koala and would only leave him when hungry or she absolutely misses you

He doesn’t wanna let go either honestly

BUT COME ON

YOU DIDNT STAY IN LABOR AND CARRIED HER FOR NINE MONTHS IN YOUR STOMACH TO END UP NOT HOLDING HER

Most of the time you would find them playing with each other

Your daughter also squishes his cheek a lot

That was a sweet introduction

Almost too sweet

Let me ruin it

THE FIRST STEP

The great uncle dazai had came to pay a visit to his lovely ‘nephew’ and subordinate

“Hello Atsushi and Y/N! I came to look at my beautiful and gorgeous nephew! :D”

Which brings me to the point that your daughter adores dazai with her whole heart

So she was sitting playing until she saw him and got so happy she stood up and walked towards him clumsily

The three of you malfunctioned

Dazai was so happy tho 🥺

She loves him that much? Plz that’s too much for his poor heart

He picked her up and spun her around

“AHHH SHE WALKED HER FIRST STEPS BECAUSE OF ME! YOHOOO!”

Meanwhile you and your husband are just staring at each other in confusion

Her first word was the classical mama but how and why she said it was absolutely heartwarming

So she was sitting in the lap of atsushi as he was showing her pictures of stuff so she can get to say anything

And then he reached the word queen with its picture

“And this is queen.”

“Mama!”

“Hehe, it’s a queen.”

“Mama!”

“Yeah, mama is a queen!”

“Yay!”

He was so happy cause he managed to film it and showed it to you

Let your reaction be of your choice <3

do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported

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babesonly · 3 years

Text

fic recs 2.0!

hello kings (gn) ive got significantly more fic than last time which means this is gonna be a little more organized than the last post bc it is much longer <3 categories in order are non casefic canonverse, casefic/roadtrip fic, finale fixits, endverse, non supernatural aus, and then non destiel ones. titles will be in bold for my favs! also within each category they’re in order from shortest to longest

Canonverse

I’m a tulip in a cup by godtiering (1.2k)

I worry that I never really came back from hell. I wonder why, if I got remade by heaven, I’m still the same screwed up kid that I always was.

Sometimes I worry I’m not into women at all.

"Guess not,” he looks at his shoes.

a REALLY good fic that’s basically just a look inside dean’s head during my bloody valentine do not read this looking for a fun time but please do read it

on vessels by flightsofangels (1.9k)

“You know,” Cas mutters into Dean’s bare skin. “When I was still… an angel, I used to dream that I would take you as my vessel.”

hello consumehimnatural fans!!!!! read newt’s fic right now its incredible

dean winchester is not a nicholas sparks protagonist by microcomets (1.9k)

Dean fell in love with Cas the way you fall asleep--slowly, and then all at once. Or some other hackneyed and trite bullshit. God, this is embarrassing.

dean is in LOVE. he’s also a disaster who keeps staring at cas’ hands. sigh

Stay by aeli_kindara (2.5k)

Coda to 13.06 (Tombstone). In which Castiel reckons with the aftermath of Dean's grief.

hello fellow widow arc fans <3 click here to see cas find out abt the events of advanced thanatology !

walking on a string by swordfishtrombones (2.7k)

Between the doomed offensive at the Firmament and the impending retreat from the ravaged northeast border, Castiel left camp long enough to answer one of Dean Winchester's prayers.

S6 DEAN IS A WAR WIFE. been really into early seasons deancas lately and this one is very good. god

the flesh of the mighty by Mudprophet (2.7k)

Ezekiel 39:17 "you shall eat the flesh of the mighty and drink the blood of the princes of the earth."

MY GOD. anyone who saw the @autisticandroids purgatory cannibalism talk and was interested read this right now. also anyone who enjoyed nbc hannibal OR raw (2016). if romantic cannibalism is remotely aligned with your interests read this right now. god

Sam Winchester, Ally At Law by alittleduck (3.3k)

Sam was pretty sure he could read every single gay friendly guide to coming out or supporting queer family members ever written and literally none of them would even imply that arguing with gay people that they were actually just homophobic constituted as "ally behavior". However, Sam was equally sure that none of those book authors had found themselves accidentally watching their brother get pounded by an Angel of the Lord at 9 am on Tuesday, so Sam was pretty sure he might actually still have the higher ground. Now, if only Jack would stop trying to bond with Dean using gay slurs long enough for Sam to convince everyone of that, he might just be able to cobble together some remnant of sanity or, failing that, dignity.

Or, the one where Sam desperately wants to invent PFLAG but Dean won't stop teaching Jack gay slurs

JACK VOICE HEY COCKSUCKERS.

hummed low by microcomets (3.3k)

Dean pulls the Impala over at a cider barn about thirty miles out; doesn't really think about it, just sees the hokey orange lettering off the roadside and lets his hands guide the Impala off the interstate with gravel spitting under the wheels.

they get a nice day out together and dean has a gay crisis and it’s written beautifully mwah

Vena Amoris and Other Old-Fashioned Bullshit by pyrebi (3.9k)

In which angelic marriage bonds are apparently stupidly easy to trigger, Cas wages multidimensional war in Heaven, Dean can't catch a break like ever, Sam rather enjoys being a dick, love saves the day, and nobody consummates anything.

sometimes i think about this fic and it hits that at this point dean and cas would have been married for more than a year. cas my beloved...

an exploration of gender; angelic by sometimeswelose (4k)

Castiel's true form is made of electromagnetic radiation. He has spent the majority of his life, if you really want to add it all up and average the whole thing out, as a wavelength of celestial intent.

The thing about being made of light: it's light in the physics sense of the word. Castiel's waves are gamma, x-ray, micro, and radio. He's visible light too, of course, a visible light so intense that it is blinding to most humans.

hello trans cas community <3 he’s literally trans he was assigned genderless and then went hm actually i will be a man! love of my life

Some Boys are Sleeping Alone by prosopopeya (4.2k)

This isn't something that's okay, not for him, but it chases him through the years until it turns into something he can't -- doesn't want to deny.

ohhh deans tenuous relationship with his sexuality my beloved...

love. worship. consummation. consumption. by redeyedwrath (4.3k)

ConsumehimNatural (copyright marcusantonius) the Series!

These are all snapshots centered around the idea of you know. Hunger in Supernatural. Both carnal hunger and other kinds. Fics are shown in semi-chronological order but this series is generally nebulously early seasons.

for ANYONE who is a consumehimnaturual this is required reading it is INCREDIBLE and gorgeous and very visceral and i am so very obsessed with it. thank you redeyedwrath for enabling my brainrot

the reach of human sense by perilously (4.5k)

“You know what Jimmy Novak looked like. You think he was beautiful—gorgeous, hot, all of it. It’s him. Not me. This isn’t my face.”

“But,” Dean says. He doesn’t know where he’s going with it. Just that Cas’ face is right there, brows drawn together and cheekbones gleaming in the lamplight. It’s a face that’s made his heart skip probably a couple hundred beats collectively since they met.

And it used to belong to someone else.

this one is just very nice <3 cas gets uncomfortable w dean calling him attractive since dean has never seen his trueform and they work it out

Down in the River by Ias (4.7k)

Alone in Purgatory and hunted by Leviathans, Castiel finds himself praying to the one person who can't hear him.

cas i love you <3 cas alone in purgatory praying to dean bc dean is the only thing he still worships i love you so much

Creature of Habit by trinityofone (5.1k)

The more you love someone, the more you want to kill them. Or: How Cas developed some bad habits, and Dean coped surprisingly well.

written in s5 when cas was depowered and completely nails the later seasons bitchy husbands dynamic it’s very good and fun <3

sink by crackers4jenn (5.4k)

"Where to?" A 9.06 coda.

very bittersweet very well written and also canon compliant so do not go into this one looking for a happy ending but i DO recommend it it’s very good

Sensational by castiowl (6.1k)

“When I first came to earth, it was advised that we temper the senses bound to our vessels. They were a distraction, we were told. An antiquated form of experiencing existence that would hinder our ability to complete our missions, whatever that may be. My true form can better facilitate these experiences. What you would recognize as heightened senses of sight and sound, among other things.”

Or, how Dean helps Cas experience all five human senses for the first time in one night.

early seasons deancas man. i love the sound part i love dean being so worried about doing a good job with this. god. read this please

Something to Protect by Sass_Master (6.2k)

Dean’s violent reaction to being unexpectedly woken has become something of a running joke among them, but Castiel can’t help but look past it to the underlying cause. It makes him ache to think that Dean feels so unsafe, so persecuted, before he’s even fully conscious.

Secretly, Castiel has been determined to work on that, to ease Dean into awareness in a less jarring way, smooth away one of the many stresses that follow him even in sleep. Now’s as good a time as any to try.

oh to sleep more soundly in the presence of someone you love...this fic is very nice i enjoyed it a lot

all this and heaven too by ftmsteverogers (7k)

“Hey,” Dean said. “I’m not ashamed of you, okay?”

Cas raised skeptical eyes to meet his.

“I mean it,” Dean insisted.

“I understand you mean it,” Cas said. “But I don’t think it’s any better if you’re only ashamed of yourself.”

hello trans dean community here is 7k of trans dean having to deal with his internalized homophobia now that he’s sleeping with cas <3 it is SO good

The wilderness. by orange_crushed (8k)

He takes a shower and the pressure is not especially good, but it doesn’t matter. It’s warm and he stands under the spray a long time. Human skin, he knows, constantly renews itself, shedding the dead cells of the epidermis. He wonders how long it will take until he is an entirely new person, until every cell on his surface is a new one. He looks at his hands under the water. It might take less than a month.

this might be the only post 9x03 fic on here with a happy ending actually? plenty of good melancholy leading up to it though <3 canon divergent after 9x03 though which means no 9x06 fanfiction gap but it is absolutely worth reading

till the juice runs by deathbanjo (8.4k)

Apparently whoever drew up the venn diagram of Dean’s sex life decided the circle labelled ‘good sex’ and the one labelled ‘sex with men’ should be kept far apart.

hello this one is SO funny dean finally gets comfortable enough with his bisexuality to start having sex with men and it goes so very bad every time so sorry about your shitty choices beloved </3

First Date by aeli_kindara (8.9k)

“We should go on a date. You and me.”

Castiel wishes he could see Dean’s face. He wishes he had any idea what to say.

“I’m asking you out, Cas.”

this one is very sweet i liked it a lot <3 good refreshing little fic where they just get to have a nice evening together

Entertaining Strangers by cadignan (9k)

Dean settles on to his side, lying in the bed facing Castiel. “So you had sex without me and you bit all my moves. I think I deserve to hear about it, at least. What was her name?”

op im in love with you. premise is established relationship deancas and cas mentions he did have sex before dean and not only that it was a threesome. good for him <3 this fic is cas describing the story of what led up to the threesome and what happened during it while dean interrupts regularly. incredible

the shape you take by noviembre (10k)

“What?” Dean says, fake-offended. “I’d be hot as a girl, you know I would.”

And this is when he really, really should have stopped talking. When he shouldn't have whipped back around and asked, “Cas, if I was a woman, you’d fuck me, right?”

Because if he hadn’t said that, then he wouldn’t have had to deal with this:

Cas, meeting his eyes, forehead wrinkles all smoothed out like there’s nothing to be confused about anymore. Cas with something at the corner of his mouth that might barely be called a smile.

Cas saying, calmly and without hesitation, “Yes, Dean.”

Dean Winchester fucks around and, with the inadvertent help of some witches, Finds Out.

dean winchester your gender is diabolical. this fic is insane and its the only thing that matters actually. dean fully convinced its normal and straight to think about being a woman so you can fuck your male friend. incredible. op im proposing to you

Sinnerman by a_good_soldier (10k)

Dean listens to Nina Simone, reads Anne Carson, and makes out with a dude (sort of).

yall want to read about dean realizing he’s in love with a man as a direct result of learning to better respect women right?

you’re fooling yourself by cowboydeanwinchester (13k)

Dean Winchester and Castiel retire from hunting to raise baby Jack. Dean struggles to allow himself the things he truly wants.

Jack is two, Castiel and Dean are idiots, and Sam's gotta solve everyone's problems.

love a married couple who doesn’t know they’re married <3 everyone say thank you sam for bullying dean

The Girlfriend Experience by rageprufrock (15k)

While it's not like Dean hasn't had a couple of truly regrettable hit-and-runs in his sexual history, this is probably the saddest fucking thing that has ever happened to him.

a classic for good fucking reason. we’ve all talked about dean thinking holding hands is too gay after having just had gay sex but my personal favorite was sam accusing dean of cheating on cas because dean bought condoms. incredible

No Kingdom To Come by domesticadventures (16k)

“We should fuck,” Dean says.

Cas looks up from where he sits on his bed, hair still damp from the shower, frowning as he places a finger on the page of his book to mark where he left off.

There are a million things Cas could say here; Dean has rehearsed them. After lunch, his restlessness had given way to a vague panic, a dread that matched his every step and crept along with him from room to room. Eventually, he had returned to his bedroom and spent the rest of the afternoon pacing back and forth, playing out all the possible scenarios. When Cas asks him Why? or Are you being serious? or when he sighs and says, in that way he has, Dean, he knows exactly what he’s going to do. He’s going to shrug casually, like he isn’t invested in the answer, like he isn’t desperate for an outlet, and say, Why not? He’s going to raise an eyebrow and say, What, are you not interested? He’s going to crowd into Cas’ personal space, he’s going to shove himself right up in there and whisper Cas against his ear.

Instead, Cas says, carefully, “Okay.”

literally the only quarantine fic i’ve ever bothered to read in any fandom and completely worth it it’s SO good. they become fwb and dean has an existential crisis and he keeps bringing up meaninglessness and death during sex

Bodies by Speary (18k)

It was a secret they never acknowledged even with each other. It would change everything, end everything if either of them ever dropped the act. So they became very good at acting, at keeping up the lie that gave them what they wanted. Even if that lie involved constantly seeking out temporary, consenting female vessels, Cas would do it. He told himself it was worth it for Dean. He just hoped that he could stop wanting more, or maybe one day Dean might stop pretending that he wasn't really sleeping with Cas every time.

i don’t even have anything to add tbh if that summary did not immediately make you click we are very different this fic is incredible. god. fellas do you ever make yourself a woman so you can fuck the man you love without him having to talk about it or confront his sexuality

it’s such a mystery (the way you know me) by fleeceframe (20k)

So the man crouching in front of Castiel is named Dean. He wonders if that’s supposed to mean something to him.

“Cas must’ve got hit with something earlier. He just dropped like a sack of fucking potatoes a minute ago. By the time I was checking on him, he had already woken up again, but now he doesn’t fucking know who we are.”

“I’m right here you know,” Castiel says testily.

Sam’s eyes are wide even as his eyebrows are furrowed, and he looks between Dean and Castiel again.

“What do you remember, Cas?”

“Firstly, that I’m not Cas. I don’t know who Cas is, but it’s not me. I don’t know who either of you are, either."

or the one where castiel is hit with a memory curse that makes him forget the winchester brothers and is stunned to find out he has a family... also why can't he stop thinking about dean?

BEST amnesia fic oh my god. cas my beloved you deserve the world. everyone read this that is not a request.

More Than Ever by Sass_Master (20k)

Dean’s getting some pancakes together for breakfast when Cas saunters in after a run.

He’s trying to focus on whisking batter, unfairly distracted by Cas a few feet away, breathing heavily and shining with perspiration. Dean’s been painfully aware for a long time that Cas is pretty easy on the eyes, but he’s used to seeing Cas buttoned-up and unflappable, looking straight-laced in a stiff oxford and an unflattering trenchcoat.

Now Cas is sweating, Dean’s borrowed t-shirt clinging to his skin, flushed from exertion and Dean really can’t deal with that in his kitchen right now.

this entire series is really good i enjoyed it a lot, i’m just putting this one specifically on the list bc the rest of the series is very explicit and this is really good as a standalone for anyone who wouldn’t be into the rest of the series!!

Being Dean Winchester by Anonymous (20k)

"You should show me some respect. I dragged you out of hell. I can throw you back in."

Who the fuck was this bitchy "warrior of God" doing talking to him like that? Fuck Cas-tee-el and his dumbass trench coat and abrasive motherfucking attitude.

Dean was done with this shit.

***

Wherein a monster of the week steals the essence of Castiel's vessel, so he must use Dean, recently raised from hell, as a vessel instead.

it is at this point i realize that there are more fics than i expected there to be on this list that involves a threesome with only two people/using the presence of a female body to act like what’s happening is heterosexual. deangirlism is a disease

I Shall Not Want by domesticadventures (20k)

His grace is burning out, and the wasteland it leaves inside him becomes an echo chamber for all the memories, all the fear and doubt and self-loathing he's collected over the years. Things said and done hound him on endless repeat until he's convinced they’ll break through his skin and fill the silence of the bunker.

His head is killing him, and he sits hunched over an open book, not really reading, just digging his fingers into his skull and praying nothing slips through the cracks.

this one is GORGEOUS i love it so so much. dean and cas are both struggling so much to get by and they’re trying to support each other but fucking it up and they have to grow together and learn to cope with the fact that this is where their lives are and they fall in love i need everyone to read this

To Boldly Go by 8daysuntiltheapocalypseiguess (24k)

Title: Just One of Those Things Author: Impala67 Series: TOS Rating: M Summary: Four years into their five-year mission, and all the planets start to look the same.

In which Dean is not Gene Roddenberry, but he does write Star Trek fanfiction.

mx winchester writing star trek fanfiction to process his own trauma <3 this is a wip but it’s SO good and i also have not consumed a single piece of star trek media so it IS definitely readable to anyone who isn’t a star trek fan. please read this

where the weeds take root by deathbanjo (30k)

“Are you happy? Y’know. Just—being here,” Dean says, gesturing to the yard with his beer bottle. “Being with—I mean, you used to fight in celestial wars and—and save the world. Now you’re growing vegetables and talking about chickens.”

this is on here just for the 1.5 people who were putting off this one like i did for no reason. it’s extremely good and it is just gentle. i enjoyed it a lot

Heroes for Ghosts by pantheon_of_discord (42k)

After Sam and Dean are arrested, Castiel is left alone and scrambling to find them. He knows they’re locked away in a government facility, and he’s still able to hear their prayers, but no matter how he tries Castiel can’t seem to track them. He chases leads and even attempts to hunt on his own, but Mary is AWOL, Crowley refuses to help, and Castiel’s options are running out.

Weeks pass, Castiel’s hope dwindles, and through it all Dean prays, keeping them connected. His voice is comforting, frustrating, and occasionally annoying, but in his solitude Castiel comes to cherish it. But then one day, without warning, Dean stops praying, and Castiel is forced to confront some uncomfortable truths about his feelings.

yall ever wonder what it would’ve been like if the sam and dean arrest storyline in s12 was interesting? yeah <3

Teaching Poetry to Fish by aeli_kindara (52k)

In which Castiel teaches poetry to fish. Also, himself. Also, eventually, Dean.

(A series-long story, diverging slightly from canon after S14.)

cas learning about humanity through poetry before dean and thats what led to him developing enough emotion to be lobotomized....cas i love you so much

Emergence by ellispark (58k)

Something’s been missing from Dean’s life for the past three years, a void left after a hunt gone terribly wrong. He often feels a sense of longing with no discernible cause, a need to talk to someone who isn’t there.

A call from an acquaintance leads Dean to James Novak, a man who disappeared more than a decade ago, and suddenly Dean gets the feeling he’s found what he’s been missing. But James isn’t really James — he’s the angel Castiel, who’s wanted by angels, demons and hunters alike. And he may be at the center of the storm that wrecked Dean’s life all those years ago.

another cool amnesia fic!! for unknown reasons everyone forgot cas three years ago but cas didn’t forget anything. cas deserves so much love and support. god

a turn of the earth by microcomets (95k)

Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.

Frigging fantastic.

(Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline preseries and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)

cas getting to meet and fall in love with pre hell dean just as much as he loves the dean he already knows oh my GOD. i love this fic so much. turn of the earth my beloved

Crossing Lines by sometimeswelose (122k)

Two Deans, one Cas - it's not as sexy as it sounds

An ethics lesson from Hell

The one where Dean from the past meets Dean in the present. They're not sure they like each other very much.

deans intense self hatred vs cas’ unwavering love for every version of dean oh my GOD also this is a wip fair warning but it’s so worth waiting for updates i’m having such a great time with this one i cannot wait to see how it gets ended

Plot Holes by saltyfeathers (160k)

Of course it wasn’t over after the apocalypse.

There was season six. Then there was season seven. Against all expectations, there was season eight. There were the alphas and purgatory, and then the Leviathans, and then the angels fell. Enter season nine. Loose threads Metatron, Abaddon, and Crowley have to be tied up. Sam, Dean, and Cas have to try to tie them while at the same time dealing with their evolving relationships and newfound graceless states.

Amidst all the chaos, someone has started publishing the Supernatural novels again. Convinced there’s something amiss in the pages, Charlie starts her own quest to suss out the truth behind the Winchester Gospels.

With the help of various faces, old and new, they must now not only deal with the typical runs of demons and recently fallen angels, but also reconcile the battles raging inside themselves, as the fate of the world, once again, quite literally lays in the palm of their hands.

saltyfeathers said i WILL make the plot holes in this show mean something because the showrunners are sure as shit never gonna adress them ! and i thank them for it bc this was a really cool read

Casefic/Roadtrip Fic

Deprived Of Every Planet by KelpietheThundergod (9k)

Dean's breathing is audible in the scant space between them, irregular. The motel room is dark, pale blue shadows falling in through the gaps in the blinds. Throwing a pattern of uneven white stripes over the bunched up covers. Over Dean's fingers twisted in the sheets. One half of him in shadow, softened by the dark. The heat of his skin. The tremble of him under Castiel's touch.

He caresses a hand over Dean's chest, slowly. Dean's mouth falls open, his body arching into Castiel's touch. Castiel stops over Dean's heart. Through the fever of his desire, he rejoices about the wonder of experiencing another's heartbeat through one's own senses.

Dean gasps, but then he turns his face away and towards the dark. Eyes closed tight and brows furrowed like something is hurting him.

Castiel stills.

“Dean?”

the case is background on this one but it Does take place over the course of a case so im putting it here. god touchstarved dean trying so hard to work through his shit for cas head in my hands i love this fic so much

before and after breakfast by spocklee (10k)

The monster of the week is a ghost who hates meat, alcohol, and feeling yourself. Guess who it is during the commercials.

chapter 2 of this one.....god. dean and cas you are both so unwell <3 i love everything abt this fic everyone read it now

we shovel all the ashes out by xylodemon (15k)

Dean’s always known things were headed this way. He just figured getting dragged under would be cleaner and easier than jumping in feet-first.

fics that make you go Oh they love each other...also there’s lesbians in it literally what else could you want.

thunder road by dothraki_shieldmaiden (20k)

After Chuck is defeated and the Winchesters settle into life without God, Dean Winchester is bored.

OR: Dean and Cas take a road trip and figure out some stuff along the way.

this fic is just like. it’s kind! this fic is kind it’s just a pleasant experience and i enjoyed it thoroughly. they’re in love and it’s good

Suck It, Judy Garland by GlitterDwarf, midrashic (20k)

It had to be St. Louis. Or, the one where Sam and Cas get fake married for a case, and Dean loses his mind.

actually im gonna defend dean here imagine youre dean and cas gives what definitely sounded like a deathbed love confession while making eye contact with you and then immediately afterwards fake dates your brother. who among us would not have been a bitch about this

best friends without benefits by lizbobjones (20k)

It’s nearing three a.m. and they’ve been on the road a long time. Sam’s been asleep in the back seat since eleven. Giving up and handing the wheel over to Cas and letting the guy who doesn’t sleep drive had seemed like a good idea.

the premise of this fic is so funny. cas voice dean you want to fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid. everyone read this

the taste of gravel in the mouth by deathbanjo (22k)

This is what Cas gave up Heaven for: greasy diner food, shitty motel rooms with even shittier cable, long car rides spent in complete silence except for the same six tapes playing over and over again, and a burnt-out husk of a man who can barely hold a conversation anymore.

alt version of getting rid of the mark of cain, the darkness never happens. this one is VERY heavy but it’s so good and it has a hopeful ending. ive read this one twice and loved it both times

Someone Who’s Feeling For Me by ellispark (45k)

Dean sees her for the first time in nearly six years in some no-name town in Idaho, and it's panic at first sight.

Lisa Braeden, the one woman Dean ever actually had a shot at a real life with, back from where he buried her in his mind. And her hand is on Cas's arm like it's no big deal, like it belongs there. Cas, Dean's dorky, sweet, badass, angelic best friend, and he's just standing there next to Lisa and not moving her hand away.

Dean feels the jealousy rising, and it's not directed where he expected it to be. Because it takes this exact moment for Dean to realize he's in love with his best friend. He's in love with his best friend, and Lisa is looking at Cas like he's the best thing since automatic rifles, and Dean is utterly fucked.

hello op please contact me. please contact me and let me see the inside of your brain. this fic was an unparalleled experience and everyone should also go through it. i love it so very much

Bumper Cars by mansikka (111k)

Two teenagers are missing from an abandoned carnival, and there’s enough to raise suspicion that their disappearance involves a ghost. Dean, Sam, and Cas arrive in town to investigate, though what they find leads them away from those teenagers, and on the trail of a ghost story that churns up things from their past.

Can newly-human Cas, and Dean, with the help of shipper!Sam, work out the mystery behind the abandoned carnival and its ghost, and along the way, figure out the riddle that is them?

one of my absolute fav case fics it forces dean to confront some aspects of johns parenting and work through some shit and also him and cas fall in love and it’s really well done. love this one a lot <3

Finale Fix-its/Finale Denial

Sorry Jimmy by K_K_TiBal (2.1k)

Based on the tumblr textpost:

jellydeans: so are cas and jimmy novak just up in heaven existing at the same time katebushstandean: #jimmy moves to heaven timbuku so that dean stops trying to make out with him every time they run into each other at the heaven grocery store

this one is just extremely funny. local midwestern heterosexual man is forced to play relationship counselor to the dumbest gay people in existence because one of them wore his face

Dean Winchester Really Needs To Make Some Gay Friends by AreYouReady (2.2k)

“Like, I’m trying to think if I’ve had, I don’t know, crushes. If I ever had a gay thing before you came along and just didn’t notice,” Dean said.

Cas suddenly looked down, and away from Dean. If Dean didn’t know better, he would swear Cas looked guilty.

“What is it, Cas?”

“You have had several… gay things before.” Cas still wouldn’t look at him.

“What? When? How come you know this better than I do?”

There was no way the answer to this question wasn’t funny as hell.

dean learning about gay ppl via the memories of dean smith...incredible.

tiny difference (between ending and starting to begin) by sunforgrace (2.4k)

Sometimes Dean catches Cas staring at the sky.

It doesn’t happen often. Not when Dean’s around to tell, anyway. But often enough that he starts to notice.

Eventually Dean starts to recognize the pattern.

Cas just doesn’t watch the sky. He watches the birds.

Chuck is gone, Cas is human, and the world is safe. In the quiet aftermath Dean and Castiel find each other again.

i really don’t have much to say abt this one it is just very good and they love each other so much

Bring Home by cenotaphy (3.8k)

Dean's phone doesn't ring on the drive back to the Bunker, but that's okay. Because—well, maybe Cas lost his cell, what with getting shuffled back and forth between a cosmic void dimension and all. And anyway, Dean doesn't want this conversation to happen over the phone, he wants to—he wants to talk to Cas face-to-face. They should talk face-to-face.

Dean will tell him—

Dean doesn't know what he'll tell Cas. Dean is, in fact, terrified by how utterly and completely he does not know what he'll say to Cas.

cas being forced to face the consequences of sending the risky text that was despair <3

dean’s coworkers vs the heteronormative agenda by cowboydeanwinchester (4.1k)

Dean started working at a local auto repair shop in Lebanon, Kansas about a year ago. His coworkers don't know much about him. Except that he has a wife. Or maybe he doesn't. But he has a kid. Who is either a toddler or a high schooler. Who is either named Jack or Sammy. He also might have a best friend named Cas, but that also might be his wife.

Truth is nobody knows what to make of Dean.

obsessed w people not knowing a single fucking thing about dean because he talks so much and never explains anything. this fic is SO funny

Enhanced Extraction Techniques by goldenraeofsun (5.8k)

The Empty takes Meg’s shape, Samandriel’s, Duma’s, every one of the thousands of angels Cas killed up in heaven. But in the middle of lecturing Cas in the form of Balthazar, it explodes in a burst of light and sound.

Dean Winchester stands in the aftermath.

the empty playing mind games on an awake cas bc it can’t put him to sleep is a thing i like a lot and this is very very good

Speak Silence No More by rea_sunshine (8.1k)

When Dean imagined this moment, it went like this:

Dean bursts into the Empty—guns blazing, chin high, righteous anger coursing through him. No matter what form his plans and fantasies and whiskey-drunk-whispered-promises took, he is always, always successful. When he imagined it, he was finally the hero Cas deserved.

The reality of the moment is this:

It’s fucking cold.

dean and cas STILL managing to not communicate with each other properly after the confession is so funny to me and this fic does it really well. also i like that a human being in the empty, where humans do NOT belong, had some like. consequences

my heart is a compass by lagaudiere (10k)

“There you are,” the Empty says, in Dean’s voice. It’s cold, like Dean’s eyes are cold, his expression set in contempt. It’s the expression Cas feared, he realizes, all the times he thought about saying it. Revulsion. It makes him feel sick in the way that goes beyond physical, here where there is nothing physical left.

The moment before it happened had been so sweet it covered up all the hurt. For years, Cas had been holding back those words, biting down on his tongue to keep from saying them. And now he had said it, and he knew that it was good, knew that it was worth it. But on the other side there is only this.

In the Empty, Cas dreams of his regrets, until someone comes looking for him.

one of thee best dean rescues cas from the empty fics out there i love the way his memories are written i love how many of them were ones that this fic came up with to give me new things to have brainworms over instead of just making me more fixated on He Watched Him Rake Leaves than i already am

killing time by orestespdf (11k)

It's been four years since Dean saved Cas from the Empty and confessed his feelings in return, and in their Vermont lakehouse, the retired couple is now learning how to heal. One morning, Dean gives Cas a haircut.

(A character study of Castiel.)

perfect fic perfect fic no notes no complaints they love each other so much and now dean is giving cas a haircut and they’re spending the day together. god.

and every time we kiss, i swear i can fly by knameless (14k)

Every time, Dean tells himself it’s the last.

aka, twelve times dean and cas kiss.

a just boy best friends kiss for every season <3 mwah

for which no words exist by MediaWhore (14k)

'a prayer for which no words exist' // richard siken

"Dear Cas who art in my bathtub, give me the strength to be honest about how I feel. For your sake and for mine. Forgive me all the times I wasn’t in the past, all the words I should have said but didn’t. And please stay. Please stay with me when all is said and done. Amen. "

Dean rescues a newly human Cas from the Empty. That's the easy step.

mediawhore i am in LOVE with you oh my god this fic. this fic. dean taking care of cas after rescuing him dean wrapping cas in a blanket oh my GOD

swimming with the fish pond fish by februyuri (17k)

Some time between Dean bleeding out on a makeshift hook in a barn in Ohio and Sam making marshmallows on his funeral pyre, Dean was brought back to life. By Castiel. Again. Dean agreed to it if only to give Jack time to work out the glitches up top. So, now Dean’s back in the land of the living and things are ... actually good, for once.

Or, as good as they can be when demons are attacking Earth, Dean’s failing to get over why he died in the first place, and Cas is suddenly, inexplicably taking every opportunity to casually tell Dean that he loves him.

this is a wip! but it is so good and so worth the read i love it a lot and am very excited for the last chapter. it IS pretty heavy though dean has a LOT to work through

looking like a true survivor (feeling like a little kid) by courfeyrac (20k)

"Jack’s a clever kid—has been ever since he was born, maybe even before that—but Dean’s pretty sure he hasn’t figured out where they’re going yet. And Dean’s… Dean’s excited about it. He remembers planning surprises for Sammy when they were little—saving up quarters and sneaking off to the arcade the year he turned seven, or slipping a book Dean had seen Sammy admiring into his jacket before sprinting out of the store the year he turned twelve. There was only so much Dean could give him back then, hindered by lack of finances and transportation and a father who paid attention. Now, though, Dean’s got a wallet full of cash, a tank full of gas, and the freedom to give his kid the kind of birthday he deserves."

Or, it's Jack's fourth birthday, and the kid wants to go to Build-A-Bear.

EVERYONE READ THIS RIGHT NOW. that is not a request this fic undid me. oh my god. oh my god. they’re a family and they’re going to build a bear and they love each other. oh my god. also no it isn’t a baby jack fic he is 4 and he is also alcal

what’s missing is found (our souls can exhale now) by sobsicles (27k)

It's not the first time Claire has ever gone missing. It is, however, the first time Kaia panics about it. Dean's dragged into the mess, but he soon finds that it's the best thing that could have happened to him.

~~~

"But have you ever just met someone and maybe it wasn't from the first moment, maybe it was after all these other moments that meant more than you ever expected them to, and it seems like your soul just—just—" Kaia makes a helpless gesture with her hands, pushing out, and she breathes out loudly. "Like it can finally exhale. And that person isn't guaranteed to make you happy, but they're—they're important. You just know it, you can't even escape it, you can't let them go. Ever met someone like that, Dean?"

"I—" Dean halts, his mouth hanging open. He's looking at Kaia, who's looking at him, and his heart is fluttering in his throat like a caged bird aching to soar again. His mind threatens to spiral out of control, but he focuses, swallowing hard. "Yeah. Um. I—yeah, I have."

deancas AND dreamhunter we love to see it also dean DOES smoke weed with kaia and apologizes for pulling a gun on her what more could you want in a fic

Command Me To Be Well by prospopeya (28k)

Dean did a lot of thinking about when and how he would get Cas back. Months of it, actually, stretching into a year, because while Sam and Eileen were settling into their new lives, Dean was stuck. He was stuck in a faraway corner of the bunker, dark and empty and hollow, ringing with the sound of a vibrating phone.

So when he falls to his knees in that same room, exhausted, hurting, breathless, and he feels a hand on his shoulder and looks up to see Cas, he realizes that he doesn't have a single clue about what to do now. Getting Cas out had been easy--actually, it'd been the opposite of that--but the planning of it, the methodical desperation of one attempt after the other had been a familiar rhythm. It'd been soothing almost, solid, something to focus on that wasn't Cas's eyes, watery and jubilant in a way Dean hadn't ever seen that up close on anyone, let alone Cas.

And now Cas is pulling him to his feet, and Dean's stumbling, and he instinctually grabs Cas's arm, and his hand lights up with a fire that he isn't prepared for.

"Hello, Dean."

oh post despair lack of communication....oh dean refusing to work through his feelings...this fic is incredible i love it everyone who enjoys dean doing everything in his power to avoid talking about feelings up to and including having sex with the guy who’s in love with him multiple times should read this

break the skin (to break the barriers) by sobsicles (29k)

The first time she meets him, he's nothing more than an almost-missed appointment.

SOBSICLES TATTOO FIC MY BELOVED. dean grieving and getting tattoos and it turns into tattoo therapy. im SO in love with mitzi it’s insane. requires some suspension of disbelief for how long a tattoo takes but it’s an incredible fic and an unparalleled experience. sobsicles does not miss

ascend by quiettewandering (53k)

Something in the world is wrong.

Demon activity is rising where mysterious black substance oozes and unusual ecological events are shaking the world. Dean, grief hanging on his shoulders, restlessly searches for answers that might lead him to the Empty… and to Cas.

But what Chuck wrote can’t be undone. The narrative thread pulls Dean along, forcing him to comply. Because once a story already has an ending, it can’t be rewritten.

Or can it?

SUPER cool concept i liked this a lot i’m pretty sure everyone’s read it already but just in case someone hasn’t you absolutely should

oh sooner or later it all comes down to faith by sobsicles (62k)

Getting used to Heaven is something of a marvel. It ain't perfect, and Dean thinks he'd hate it if it was, which is probably why it isn't.

~~~

"You don't understand," Dean whispers, exhaling shakily. "I know you don't, because even I don't. The instant you were gone, I wanted you back. Cas, I wanted you back. I wanted—I wanted—"

Cas stares at him, searching his face. After a moment, his own face falls slack, eyes widening just so. "Oh," he breathes out.

Dean wants to be furious that Cas has figured it out before he has—whatever it is—but he's not even that surprised. Cas knows him too well, always has, even more than Dean knows himself. He's been kicking Dean in the goddamn teeth with how deeply he understands him, even about the things Dean doesn't, ever since they first met. You don't think you deserve to be saved, that's what Cas had said. All bundled up in impossibilities and power, this being that looked at Dean Winchester and knew every single inch of him, as if he had a right to each part.

"What?" Dean grits out.

"I love you, too."

the ONLY heaven fic. i do not read heaven fics bc i refuse to budge in my finale denialism i refuse to read fic where it is accepted that dean dies. i was hesitant to read this but god im glad i did it was so good. literally the best possible outcome of dean dying

Endverse

final fantasy. by orange_crushed (1.9k)

“If I’d actually been born human, would I have gotten sick like everyone else? Would I be running around gnawing on the neighbors?” Castiel tilts his head up and even from here Dean can see the black ring of his pupils, wide and dark as dead stars. He’s high as fuck and he’s been loading the guns for forty-five minutes. He stares into the space where Dean is. He smiles and shows his teeth. “Maybe you’d have already put a bullet in my head.”

"This is why you don’t lead storytime anymore," Dean says. "This kind of shit."

endverse last night on earth fics are something that can be so personal actually. god

The Last Song by Moorishflower (3.5k)

The very last song is the Song of Solomon, and Castiel sings it only for Dean. Set in "The End."

this is like. pre endverse and the tone is so like. wistful? is the best word ive got? it’s gorgeous i love it but fair warning there is graphic description of like. viscera and infected wounds

to think that we could stay the same by cipherwriter (6.5k)

cas has all he needs; himself, his creation, and enough power to continue this cycle for a long time. he's fine. dean wants to take care of him anyway.

oh my GOD this one is good it’s based off the thing of how originally endverse cas was supposed to be just sitting in a room killing and resurrecting the same cockroach over and over. very bittersweet at some points i love it a lot, do not read it if youre looking for something happy though lmao

the first church at the end of the world by withbloodstainedclothingon (11k)

The angels don’t eat the brain. Only Croats do that.

this one is fucked but it’s incredible it contains very heavy and violent subject matter and cas is an Actual cult leader he doesn’t just have orgies it is SO well done and i had a great time reading it i recommend it very highly if the warnings sound like something you can stomach

Down to Agincourt by seperis (1.1 million. i know. yes it’s a wip)

There is no such thing as a guarantee when it comes to war.

The outcome's known. Why try? Return your rusty sword to battered sheath, bow your head and bend your stubborn knee. Why take the field when you cannot win the war? But Harry -- he went down to Agincourt.

PLEASE. i know the length is intimidating i KNOW it’s a very long fic but please. please read down to agincourt i am begging you. head in my HANDS this series is incredible.

Non Supernatural AUS

Long-Term Relationship by bendingsignpost (2.7k)

Castiel says, budging over to make room for Dean on the couch, “I thought we should have a serious talk about our relationship.”

Reflexively, Dean laughs.

Castiel does not.

“Uh, Cas... you know we’re not dating, right?”

look man it’s bendingsignpost okay. it’s bendingsignpost it’s good and it’s sweet and you should read it

One White Lie by komodobits (11k)

Castiel takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. He doesn’t need to run through what he’s going to say – he’s already planned and edited and rehearsed it a thousand times. He is going to ask Dean Winchester out to dinner. If it’s not too forward, he’ll say, perfectly charming. You see, I’ve seen you around the neighbourhood and you always seem so earnest and I’d really like to get to know you bette— The door swings open, and Castiel panics.

He intends to excuse himself. He means to apologise and come back some other time. However, in a moment of blind fear, what comes out of his mouth instead are the words, “Could you spare a moment for Jesus Christ?”

do you ever pretend to be a jehovahs witness for months to hang out with the guy you like because you fucked up asking him out? yeah.

separate ways and sleeping dogs by sobsicles (53k)

Dean is three years sober when Cas comes back into town.

~~~

For a moment, they just stare at each other. Dean, once again, has to swallow the urge to offer to swallow something else. It's very hard to resist the gut-wrenching pull of want that hooks in his chest whenever he looks at Cas. And to think, he used to have him, used to be able to act on that want.

God, he's so fucking stupid.

Well, there's no point in kicking himself three years later for shit he can't change. He'll just sit right here and pretend that his fingers aren't twitching with the urge to reach out and touch. He can't do that anymore, and it's his own damn fault.

"Three years ago," Cas prompts.

Dean huffs a weak laugh. "Yeah. Eventful."

this fic hit me SO hard emotionally oh my god. don’t have much to say bc most of my thoughts on this fic are very personal but my god read this please

Everyone’s a Critic by Englandwouldfall (109k)

The one where uninspired chef Dean Winchester has a one night stand with the male (!) food critic who described the flavour of his garlic bread as 'closeted' and accidentally ends up dating him to try and prove that he's a kick ass chef, thank you very much.

(He may have a point about the 'closeted' thing).

this one is SO fun. dating the food critic who called your garlic bread closeted and lying about your career because you’re embarrassed and you want to redeem your food in his eyes but then you fall in love with him

Non Destiel Centric

gender? you mean that thing i have that pisses people off? by bigender dean winchester (homosexualitie) (946 words)

sam and dean paint each other's nails and dean abuses the technicalities of her gender. what more could you want?

HELLO HE/SHE DEAN COMMUNITY oh my god the pure rush of euphoria reading this. oh my god. oh my god.

the quiet road to a distant city by rottingbrains (1.2k)

Sam stares out the windshield again. They’re approaching a city, and she can see the lights in the distance. She’s past the danger zone, and she feels like the world around her reflects that in some way she can’t put into words- as if God is telling her that it’s okay. She did the right thing, and soon she will be past the lonely unknown and into the warm, forgiving light of acceptance. Or something. Come to think of it, the lights only look warm from far away, and she knows that the actual city will seem far less welcoming. Still. Best not to imagine the worst when it’s already going well.

required reading for transfem lesbian sam fans. fics that live in your ribcage to make your heart feel good

Four People Ruby Seduced & One She Actually Fell For (Or: Ruby's Epic Love Affair with Humanity in General and Sam in Specific) by tuesday (3.7k)

In which Ruby has a lot of sex, is not any kind of therapist that would be legal, and helps a few people out for her own reasons. (S4/S5 AU)

for everyone out there who enjoys ruby being a girlboss <3

Fractured Link by Trell (orphan_account) (5.5k)

Meg goes on, resolute despite the way Dean flinches, "He likes me. He likes me a lot, and I like him back, and that's probably good enough for both of us. But fuck me for saying so, Dean-o, he loves you, probably more than anything else on his daddy's green Earth, and you need to man up and give back what Clarence over there has been devoting to you for years."

this is meg/dean/cas which is not smth i really seek out but this was extremely good. set in s7 so it’s meg and dean and honey cas and it’s a lot of dean figuring his shit out and trying to forgive cas and i love meg a lot in this

#spn #supernatural #destiel #deancas #mine

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