#and ever since I first read about Wildings I been OBSESSED | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

a-certain-romance · 1 year

Text

Don’t be surprised when you get bent over

Characters/Ships: Ei, Miko, & Jean x fem!reader

Synopsis: You can’t avoid them forever <3

Warnings: Smut written by a minor, fingering (Miko), some somno (Ei), oral R receiving (Ei), overstimulation (Ei), teasing (Jean), face-sitting (Jean)

Ei wouldn’t call it an obsession. You’ve been slowly introducing her to Kamera mechanisms and she’s been hooked ever since. Her curiosity since her time spent with the traveler has been eye-opening, and as a surprise gift to Ei you went out and bought her one. She never really had much free time as it is, and now her hobby draws her to every small crevice of Inazuma. She finds herself accompanying her soldiers to various military camps or meetings with small villages, and not only do the experiences enhance her skills but it also becomes a way for Ei to re-familiarizes herself with Inazuma’s culture and landscape.

You support her, obviously, until it starts to keep her out of the bed. Despite her day time exploration the one thing you can always count on (unless she was on a long trip) was that she would meet you in bed and hold you until the both of you fell asleep. But now Ei is out in the middle of the night focusing on the stars, while you shiver in a bed that lacks Ei’s warmth.

Hatching a plan to get her attention was fairly simple; all it took was a lewd promise for her to come running. You spent the entire day out, not on the streets in the city but wandering around in the plains and cozying up to the wild foxes. You debated whether to not Ei would be home once the sun set, but then you remembered that tonight was supposed to be a full moon, and figured Ei would want to photograph that as well. You went to sleep early after finishing a meal prepped by the cooks and didn’t think of much else.

As you slept, you had the best dream about Ei. She tied you up to the bed posts and was eating you out as if she were starving for you. Her tongue felt so soft yet firm on your clit as she licked away at your cunt. And the best part was that it felt so real. Every swipe of her tongue left you feeling in so much bliss. But the sounds were getting echoey, and the spike of pleasure felt too good to be just a dream.

You opened your eyes to find that your arms were in fact restrained: wrists tied around in intricate little bows, just how long were you asleep? Your lower half remained free, but was extremely sore and sensitive. Ei’s arms hooked possessively around your legs, her head buried between them as the rest lay limp over her shoulders.

Your movement brings her back from her haze. Her lustful eyes, her cocky grin; fuck you can feel yourself dripping at just the sight of her.

“At last, you’re awake. You make the cutest expressions when you asleep, did you know that?” Those last few words were mumbled in your pussy, sending shockwaves of pleasure. Ei chuckles against you, “Though I suppose that is from my doing”

Her tongue moved around you, paying extra special attention to your sensitive clit. You whine and dig your heels into her back as you start to grind against her face. Your thrusts, almost automatically, start to speed up and soon Ei is licking up your mess.

Just as you’re catching your breath, Ei replaces her tongue with her fingers against your pussy lips. “I intend to keep you up til dawn,” Ei eyes bore into your own as she looks up at you from above your navel,

“A shogun doesn’t back down on her word”

Like Ei, Jean’s ignorance comes from a new hobby as well. You’ve noticed that Jean’s mental fatigue has been increasing for a while now. She’s been dealing with the stress in more physical ways: meditation, training, massages from you that sometimes lead to more. Yet she can’t shake off the feeling that wears her down at the days end.

You’re a library aide, training to become a librarian alongside Lisa. During one of your afternoon tea breaks she brings up the idea of reading. You dismiss it at first, Jean has always sighed that there was just not enough hours in the day for something like that, but after some consideration you took Lisa’s advice to heart. During one of her (forced) breaks you gifted Jean one of your favorites.

Suffice to say she was in and out of the Library nearly every other day. Jean feverishly flies through books every time she finishes another draining report. And every time she reaches the back cover you are always there to greet her when she comes in for a new one.

She’s been extremely invested in all these little worlds, but has slowly been less and less invested in your relationship. You’re extremely happy that Jean’s taking the time to nourish this new side of her, but sometimes she forgets to make the time for you too.

Jean can be rather clueless sometimes. It’s not as if you’ve tried to stop her, but she’s oblivious to the hints you drop. It’s been weeks since you’ve last been on a date, and the most interaction you get from her is when you see her at the library. Even when you’re back home, it’s like she’s a ghost, only ever feeling her presence when she’s nearby. And that’s if she has the energy to not collapse immediately she she hits the sheets.

The next time Jean comes in through those library doors you make sure to slip a note in the next book you give her.

Now you’re the one who’s occupied throughout the day. Even Lisa starts to question your spark of work ethic and Jean’s prolonged visits, but it’s the only time she can hope to catch you off guard since she’s so tired after a long days work. And there’s so many close calls, you would’ve let Jean take you against the tables had it not been for Lisa’s watchful eye.

Jean can’t take it anymore. She nearly lost it during this trip. Jean forced herself to sneak in before closing because one of her many library books, one that she nearly forgot about, was about to be due the next day, and she didn’t want to suffer Lisa’s wrath. But there was no Lisa in sight, just the two of you alone in the big, empty library.

Apologies spilled out of her mouth filled with promises to manage her time and attention better and begged, begged, for your forgiveness. You accept and become trapped as she bend you against one of the library tables.

Even though you were aching for her touch this was still your workplace, and the shame of cleaning up cum from the tables would embarrass you to no end, especially if Lisa happened to see. You walk home together and she spends that time teasing and discreetly touching you.

When you get home she pulls you flush against her chest and kisses your cheek sensually. Her hand hold the back of your neck gently as she twirls around a few baby hairs. Her mouth goes to your lips and you feel her tongue run along the bottom of your lip. The second you allow entrance she picks you up and carries you bridal style to set you down on the bed.

As she lays her weigh on top of you her knee presses right up against your heat. She pulls back to take a breath, and goes back in right after. It’s a slow make-out session, one that you weren’t expecting after how Jean’s been acting’s. You guide her hand to your panties but she stops short.

“In a rush, are we? Aren’t you forgetting we have all night?”

“We nearly did it at the library, I’m sure you’re as pent up as I am”

“Maybe so,” she says as she un-do’s the buttons of your shirt, “but it’s only fair after that stunt you pulled. I finally have you alone now, I want to make the most of it.”

She leans in to whisper in your ear, “If you cum before I say you can, there’ll be serious repercussions .”

She maneuvers you both so that you rest your pussy on her face. She lets you control the pace, control the rhythm and control how deep you want to go. But that statement was her only warning. And when your mind gets fuzzy from all the stimulation you forget about the rule, that one rule.

When you get back down to the mattress Jean is tsking.

“Looks like we really do have a long night ahead of us”

Yae Miko is such a tease

One second her hands are all over you as she whispers dirty things into your ear and the next, she’s laughing at your expression and walking away. She loves how you give into her so quickly. It made her wonder how you would fair if she were to cut off her affections all at once.

She’d cling to your arm in public and and act as if you were a stranger behind closed doors. Why? Her own curiosity of course. The psychology of humans will never not be of great entertainment for her. And, it’s been so long since she’s seen you so desperate.

You’ve had enough of her testing your resolve, so you decided to do the same. As Miko slept, you wrote a neat little message in an envelope and, in the morning, instructed a shrine maiden to deliver it to Miko. And once the plan was set in stone, you remain sure that bringing out Miko’s competitive side will make her end this whole…experiment.

You avoided that room like the plague. Despite her attempts to catch you off guard you know her well enough to predict her next move. Indoors it was like a game of chess, and outside a game of cat and mouse. This competition lasted for days. Both too stubborn to give in and both too filled with more tension than they can handle.

You came back home during the evening when you knew Miko was busy with shrine duties. You heard from an acquaintance that Miko was held up in her office with paperwork and would probably not finish until later.

Deciding to relax, you recline onto the bed for a break. You breathe in the sweet scent of Sakura blossoms from Miko’s pillow and realize how lonely the past few days have been. Sure, the competition and the tricks were sometimes fun but what you really missed was seeing the want in her eyes.

You pull off your shirt and unhook your bra, gasping at how the cool air brushes your nipples. You grope your breasts while thinking of the perfect, pink-haired Yokai who’s captured your heart. You imagine what it would feel like if she were here right now. Her touch is magnetic, you dream of it as you circle your finger around your nipple. The image of what Miko would do to you fills your mind and sends heat straight to your core. The hand that isn’t occupied with your boob grazes between your legs and you whine out “Miko”.

The door bursts open. “And so the mouse has been caught. You’ve surprised me, I did not think you would last for this long.“ She removes your hand and replaces it with you fingers.

“But I knew you had to come home eventually, and it seems the story I planted worked”. Her fingers begin to pump into you at a steady rhythm. “Turn around for me”

When you flip onto your stomach she slightly hovers over you, running her hands along your backside, admiring your beauty. “It’s been so long hasn’t it? Truth be told, I believe the wait makes it worth the while”. Her fingers return to your cunt and resume their thrusts, only much faster this time.

He fingers hit harder and deeper into you, sliding across all the right places. But before letting you finish she slows down her movements to an almost lazy pace. She simply laughs at your confusion, “You have all night to cum, why rush it?”

947 notes · View notes

universecorp · 2 years

Text

⤷ stoner!bestfriend!beomgyu x fem!reader

⤷ w.c: 6.2k

⤷ summary: as much as beomgyu tries to deny falling in love with you, even after he claimed you saved him from believing his whole purpose of life was to be bad luck, his heart cannot tell a lie.

⤷ warnings: this fic contains slight physical and verbal abuse (not from beomgyu)! read with caution!

⤷ contents: angst, fluff, switch dom leaning!beomgyu, switch!reader, oral (fem receiving), fingering (fem receiving), mutual masturbation, slight voyeur, beomgyu likes being praised, tummy bulge.. kinda(?), slight obsession(?), spit (not in the mouth), nipple play, lots of kissing, unprotected sex (be carefullll!), beomgyu has a big di–

“come here.” smoke left his mouth as he spoke to you looking at your frame with heavy lids. earlier, the boy texted you saying to pack a bag and get everything ready for you to spend the night and without hesitation you obliged. now, you were in his car at 2 in the morning hot boxing in it. you climbed over the armrest and sat platonically close to the pretty boy. he put the blunt in your lip making you inhale in the strong gas and release it through your nose.

“i’m such a bad influence,” he laughed, feeling your body relax from its tense state. you shook your head no as you laughed at his drawn out words. “to be fair, i did ask you to teach me how to smoke so it’s not you it’s just me and my curiosity.” he smiled at you and blew out another puff of smoke.

the almost empty parking lot was extremely quiet, letting his thoughts and memories run wild with whatever. the memories of you two almost getting caught by the police made your shoulders bounce as you tried to contain your laughter. “what’s running though that head of yours?” the boy asked.

“it’s really been almost three years huh?” it didn’t sound like a question, more like a realization on your part remembering the first time you met him. his hair was all but long, quiet as you two sat across from one another at the class table. it was you who had to initiate talking to him first, only getting close the first day. days and days passed and now you’re here cuddling with him as you smoke away every problem you two had.

“yeah it has…” he breathed out. “and you’re still as bossy as ever.” you playfully smacked his leg, rolling your eyes. it was quiet after, the sound of cars honking here and there and the music playing quietly in the background strangely making the high stronger and heightening your senses; it felt good.

“me and my dad got into another argument,” beomgyu sighed. his fingers played with the bottom of your shirt as he prepared to have this talk with you. he could see a glimpse of your jaw clenching in anger. “he was drunk and started talking about mom again and blamed me… again.”

beomgyu has told you about his dad ever since you two have gotten closer, and everytime he brings him up you could feel the fumes coming out of your ears. you hated him, he always blamed beomgyu for his mother’s departure. they never knew what happened to his mother but to beomgyu he was starting to believe it was true and it made you furious.

“he told me i was nothing but bad luck,” a soft chuckle fell from his lips until he replaced them with the blunt in his hand inhaling and exhaling one last time before he put out the small flame. “i’m starting to think it’s true.”

“i’ll hit you if you say that shit again,” you spat. “don’t believe him. he is bad luck, not you.” beomgyu smiled to himself as he played with your shirt again. of course he didn’t stop believing it, his father drilled that in his head for about four years now but hearing you say it’s not made him feel less shitty; your presence always made his life feel less shitty. he always admired your brightness, how nothing seemed to bother you but if it did you fought against and didn’t run away from it. he almost felt like a wuss compared to you, always running away from his problems and smoking it away when he had the chance. but the closer he got to you, the more his admiration started to turn into something more. to him it was still just admiration but in all reality he fell harder than anybody else.

he never wanted to put his problems on you, never went into crazy detail about his arguments with his father especially the ones that’s got physical. he never told you that you were his only reason to live, but he would tell you everyday that he loved you, he cared about you and wanted your friendship to last a lifetime. it would be selfish of him to tell you that, but he wanted to show you in every way he appreciated you.

“let’s go home, i’m sleepy.” a yawn came from you as you stretched your limbs out and climbed back into the passenger’s side. his thoughts were interrupted by your demand resulting in a smile as he climbed his way to the driver's seat. “anything for the princess.”

“thank fuck dad’s not home,” he whispered. you both walked up the steps to his bedroom and you instantly took socks off and jumped in his bed, sinking into the mattress like it was your very own. he just smiled and followed suit after he closed the door, jumping on top of you making an ‘oof!’ fall out of your mouth. “my fault.”

“yeah, your fault alright,” you huffed as you pushed him off of you. his hair fell over his pretty face teeth showing in a bright smile only causing you to form a contagious smile right after. “goodnight gyu.”

“goodnight princess.”

–––––

soft breathy noises came from the both of you as you slept comfortably on your designated side. beomgyu’s arm randomly across your body while you lay on your stomach with your legs tangled up in his (you don’t know how to keep still in your sleep). as soft and comfortable as you both sound at 5:42 in the morning, it was soon ruined by the devil himself.

“beomgyu!!”

this muffled yell was soon followed by stuff falling off of counters and some dishes being slammed against the table. “beomgyu!!” so used to the tone of his name being screamed, said boy rose up from his bed eyes roaming the room to see where he was. ‘fuck’ continued to run through his mind, wishing his dad didn’t come into the house like this. usually he comes into the house mumbling to himself and running into his room to puke up the remaining alcohol in his system and then sleep, but of course the time you spend the night his dad wants to start a riot. in the corner of his eye he sees you stir in your sleep slowly waking up from the noise. “gyu..?”

“shh,” he whispered to you, placing his hand on your head softly bringing your head back down on the pillow. “go back to sleep, i’ll take care of it okay?” he threw the covers off of him and placed his feet against the floor. he immediately jolted out of his room, making sure to close the door behind him just in case it got too loud. once he got off the last step, he heard his father scream his name one last time, making him flinch. his heart was pounding, his adrenaline kicking in making his jaw clench in fear and anger.

“yes, dad?” beomgyu asked, his voice showing no signs of fear while his heart did the opposite. the smell of alcohol was so strong coming from his father that he could smell it from the bottom of the steps while the latter stood at the sink filled up with dirty dishes.

“you finally came downstairs?” his father slurred as he tried to hold himself up using the sink. “how fucking lazy are you? why aren’t these dishes cleaned up?” of course, something so small is going to turn into something so big. it was a repeating cycle for beomgyu, it’s fine then once his dad started drinking it got worse. the small things will turn into something huge, making a two minute argument turned into a screaming match. “your mother never liked it when the dishes weren’t clean, here you go fucking up again.”

your eyes opened slowly again trying to take in the scenery and figure out where the hell were you. beomgyu’s black and white comforter was a dead give away once you shifted in your spot. speaking of the boy, you wondered if he was okay remembering his father came home. you looked at your phone to see the time at 5:58am, the sun was barely out and his dad was yelling like a maniac. you stepped down from his bed and slowly walked towards his door to hear the rest of the conversation.

the sound of beomgyu’s yelling voice boomed into your ears, later followed by items being thrown and destroyed. you could hear curses fall from both your best friend and his father’s lips and the sound of a struggle. you immediately ran down the steps with your heart beating as fast as possible, worried for beomgyu hoping he wasn’t getting hurt. your eyes fell upon his dad gripping his shirt and beomgyu yelling in his face and his hand on his father’s arm. the men turned and looked at you once they felt your presence, this made his father scoff and let go of beomgyu’s shirt.

“ah.. no wonder why you smelled like bitch..” he slurred. “shut the fuck up,” beomgyu spat. you ran over to beomgyu, seeing a slight cut on his lip making your scared face show concern and sadness; this being your first time seeing beomgyu and his father get into a physical fight you were scared for him and absolutely pissed beyond belief.

“she’s going to end up leaving you next,” his father slurred, letting a chuckle slip out of his lips. “just like your mother.”

“he’s not like you,” you mumbled to yourself but loud enough for his father to hear. the said man darted his eyes to you and took several steps closer to you. every step he came in quicker and quicker, and before you could physically defend yourself beomgyu’s fist came across the side of his father’s face, knocking the man out onto the floor. it felt like time was moving unbelievably slow, the body of the man laying on the floor not moving an inch and your fingertips cold with fear. beomgyu felt his life flash as he thought about what his dad would do to him if he got up. his mind screaming at him to defend you and himself, he grabbed the empty bottle his father left on the table and held it by his side slowly rising it up over his head. he didn’t know what came over him, only his fight or flight kicking in waiting to see if his father would get up.

“gyu..! what are you doing?!” your tone was stern and worried as you called him. you grabbed his arm to bring him back to his senses feeling him shake and tense up. “what if—“ his eyes wouldn’t leave his father’s cold body. “he’s knocked out cold, he’s breathing and he’s fine..” you reassured him. your eyes couldn’t help but drift over to the body as well. beomgyu’s father’s back moved up and down indicating he was breathing which snapped beomgyu back into reality. he dropped the bottle and grabbed your wrist, dragging you back up the stairs. “we have to go…”

frantically, he packed his bags. he didn’t care what he was putting in there, he just needed to leave before his father came to his senses. he ran into his father’s room, going into his drawer to find a couple hundred dollar bills and stuffing it into his pocket. once he finished packing, you two ran to his car and left without a care in the world.

“it’s 6:54,” you stated as beomgyu kept driving. you two stopped by the gas station and bought yourselves some snacks and water. you two decided to go to a hotel and stay there until whenever, just wanting to take everything day by day. “you wanna do something else before you go to the hotel or do you wanna sleep?” you could tell that the situation was running through his head nonstop. he picked at his lips every couple of seconds and played with the lobe of his ear, stimulating his senses while he thought about what just happened. “let’s just go to the hotel and sleep… i wanna shower.”

“this is nice,” you sighed once you walked into the room. you both put your bags down and put some of your belongings in the dressers and some of your things in the bathroom. “go shower i’ll help unpack the rest of your things.” beomgyu smiled at you and did as you told, grabbing his clothes and making his way towards the bathroom. you dig through his bag as you put the rest of his belongs in spots he could easily find them in. in one of the small pockets, you saw a small keychain that looked all too familiar in the palm of your hand. the longer you looked the more familiar it got until it clicked; it was a key chain that you bought him when you traveled out of the country, bringing back a small souvenir for him to remember you by. of course you didn’t think he would hold it dearly but he did. he remembered to bring it with him on this day by day journey with you as good luck, always having a small piece of you near him. you could feel your chest become warm as you smiled at the keychain in your hand, feeling the urge to cry knowing that he truly did care about it and about you. “he’s so cute,” you whispered to yourself once you put it back in the pocket. you put his bag to the side once you cleared everything out of it and finished off your bag also getting your pajamas ready to take a shower once the man came out.

“it’s all yours,” he said as he dried his wet hair. you got all your belongings and made your way into the shower. the feeling of the warm water eased up your tensed muscles, making you release a nice drawn out sigh of relief. this was exactly what you needed after the hectic morning, you could feel yourself drifting off to sleep in the shower due to the comforting water hitting your body. as you washed, you couldn’t help but think about beomgyu. before he even knew you he was going through terrible hardships, having him feel like he was the cause of his mother leaving and his father’s wrath. you wished he didn’t have to go through it, prayed to whatever higher being to get beomgyu out of that hell knowing he didn’t deserve any of it. without realizing, tears started to well up in your eyes blurring your version. “let me get out…” you whispered to yourself, rinsing your soapy body off.

“come to bed,” beomgyu spoke smiling at your beautiful frame, taking in every inch of you hoping you couldn’t read his mind. he was trying his best to be respectful in his mind but fuck it was hard keeping it sane while seeing you in a large shirt. you were so pretty to him, knowing that you are ten times more beautiful in his eyes due to his infatuation.

is it really only just infatuation?

no.

he liked you, found love within you and wanted nothing more than for you to know whether he told you or showed it through his actions. he didn’t want to believe it but as the days flew by he started to fall deeper and deeper, craving your attention and finding every way to please you and see your smiling face. maybe it was the start of an obsession? he truly didn’t know, but he tried his best to figure out what this feeling was besides the word ‘love’.

but that’s what it was.

you jumped into bed, the fresh sheets rubbing your bare legs making a soft sigh fall from your lips. you glanced at the clock one last time seeing how much time has passed; 8:26. beomgyu’s arm wrapped around your body bringing you closer to him snuggling his nose into your neck. “goodnight– night? good morning princess…?” he giggled. you shook your head with your lips forming into a smile.

“goodnight gyu.”

–––––––

“fuck i have to pee.” you slowly woke up rubbing your eyes adjusting to the dark light in the room. “what time is it..?” you spoke to yourself picking up your phone on the nightstand beside you. “fuck we slept that long?” it was 7:56 pm and the sky was close to becoming pitch black. you ran to the bathroom and relieved yourself breathing in and out slowly. you couldn’t wait to get back in the bed and sleep just a little longer, you could imagine yourself melting into the mattress once again making you shiver a bit in excitement. once you washed your hands, you laid back down in the bed pulling the covers over your frame. your eyes drifted to beomgyu’s face, taking in every line, crevice, bump, and every feature. he was so beautiful, everything about him screamed prince. sometimes, you wondered how somebody so beautiful came into your life, your boring life at that.

before you two met, your life was just a boring cycle; work, school, sleep, repeat. but thanks to a higher being, you two met. beomgyu was unpredictable, making the anticipation build up within you. unintentionally, your hand came up and caressed his soft cheek, your thumb rubbing soft and slow patterns against it. while you dazed at him softly, you saw tears run from his eyes in his sleep. a few seconds later his face started to twitch and his eyebrows furrowed.

“gyu?” you whispered. the hand that was on his cheek came down to his shoulder shaking him slightly to stir him awake. his eyes opened widely taking in your worried face. suddenly, he pulled you into a tight hug, crying harder into your shoulder. “gyu..? what’s wrong?”

scenes of his dream ran through his head as he sobbed into your shoulder. in his dream, you left him like his father foreshadowed. walking out just like his mother, still believing he was nothing but bad luck. he could feel his life crumble at the lack of your presence, begging for you to come back and you wouldn’t.

but thankfully, it was just a dream.

“don’t leave me..” you blinked at his words, softly pushing him off of you. his eyes blinked drops of tears, staining his beautiful face making yours soften. “please don’t leave me.” his hands found comfort on your warm thighs, hands shaking slightly as he rubbed patterns on them.

maybe it was how dark it was in the room or maybe it was your sick mind but…

fuck he looked so pretty.

his cheeks were red and his lips were puffy staring at you with his big shiny red eyes. it was the prettiest sight you’ve ever seen.

you smiled at him once again, leaning towards his face. beomgyu could feel his heart stop beating and his breathing pick up. you wiped the tear on his right cheek, pressing a kiss upon it. “don’t be stupid, gyu.”

you pulled back and looked at him crossing your arms. you were right, why would you? you were there for him through the hardest points of his life and you stood up against his dad, of course you wouldn’t leave. he looked at you but then his eyes drifted to your lips. he could feel them on his cheek like it was plastered there. he wondered if he could feel your lips somewhere else… and once that thought ran through his head his eyes trailed down to the heat between your legs. it completely slipped your mind that you had nothing underneath but panties and fuck beomgyu was losing it.

he found himself leaning towards you, his face closing into yours keeping his gaze on your lips. now, it was your turn for your heart to stop. hands going cold with anticipation at beomgyu’s actions. time was moving so slow the closer he kept getting, his lips only a few centimeters away from yours. your patience was weak, itching to feel his lips on yours and finally taste him. he looked back up making eye contact with you once more begging for permission. the tension in the room was suffocating, swirling around both of your bodies ready to feel one another. you leaned in slowly, connecting both of your lips with a soft peck just enough to feel electricity run from your lips to your tongue then the entirety of your body; this was the start of an addiction. as you pulled away you watched his reaction, his eyes slowly fluttering open only to find themselves staring at your lips again. “..more..” he sighed, his voice raspy from his sleep making your panties stick to your core feeling it become more hot and wet.

and you listened.

your lips connected with his once more in a peck then another.. and then another finally turning into a heated kiss. his hands found your face, bringing you closer to him. you placed your hands on the sides of his neck, deepening the kiss and pulling out a soft grunt from beomgyu. his body slowly pushed you down, your back against the sheets as he climbed on top of you with his lips still connected to yours. his right hand is placed beside your head while the other brought its way to your lower back, pulling your body close to his as his tongue suffocated you. you gripped onto his arm moaning into kiss as you felt your panties become soaked from the menstrations, your dizzy head only being filled with him. your moans turned into beautiful sighs which made beomgyu’s loose shorts feel tight around his semi-hard dick. “fuck..” he whispered against your lips breaking the kiss and seeing your already fucked out face. you began to bite at your lip unintentionally seeing gravity go against his hair, surrounding his face just a little. he was gorgeous and seeing him look at you like you were the only one, the only one for him made your cunt clench around nothing ready to be filled up with something. “you’re doing that on purpose huh?” you couldn’t help but smile at him and that sexy smirk on his face. “if you liked it.. then sure i did.”

he shook his head and brought his lips down back to yours, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth. a hand moved to your panties feeling that soaked patch near your entrance and making you shiver at his touch. you could feel his smirk on your lips as he continued to kiss you. his middle finger pushed against your clothed clit, forcing you to break from the kiss and moan out the cutest noise he has ever heard. he began to rub circles on your button of nerves, making your hips buck against his hand in urgence. his name fell softly from your lips wanting him to give you what you wanted. you continued to clench around nothing, bucking up for him to go faster ready to build up that bubble so it could pop.

but he didn’t want that.

he wanted to take his time with you, making you feel good as much as he could without a rush. immediately, he stopped. you whined from the lack of friction with his name rolling off your tongue. “uh unh baby,” he breathed. he placed his thumb on your bottom lip, bringing it down and forcing it into your mouth. your tongue swirled around the digit causing your eyes to flutter shut for a second before opening them again, “not yet.” he brought his head down making him and your heat meet face to face. the wet patch taunting him causing him to shiver. he stuck his tongue out shyly licking the wet patch making you gasp. his eyes came in contact with your hooded lids watching your chest move up and down from your heavy breathing. his nose pushed against your clit while his tongue pressed deeper into your clothed entrance only scratching the surface of that itch. “holy shit..” you breathed, your head falling back at the addicting feeling. he grunted at your sweetness only getting a teaser of your actual taste but fuck he loved the wait, he loved the teasing, and he loved seeing you become impatient. his aching dick rubbed against the cool sheets on the bed making more noises come out. he maneuvered his tongue over to your clit, still ‘eating you out’ with the cloth in between. his index finger pushed the panties at your entrance, wiggling them just a bit to tease around the hole. gasps fell from your lips as you bucked into him. “gyu please..” you begged. “off.. just take them off please.”

his mouth left your core with a small pout, a little bit of slick around his plump lips. “awee,” he whined. he gripped onto your thighs, placing small kisses on them close to your cunt. “where’s the fun in that, princess?” he bit a small mark into your thigh, immediately licking right after to soothe the pinch. although it was fun, he was feeling himself get impatient too, wanting to officially taste you and give you everything you desired. he pulled your panties down watching your cunt as it clenched around nothing, making his dick twitch in his shorts. he blew cool air against you and took a trial lick between your lips. the pretty boy whined at your taste, immediately diving back in for more. flattening his tongue against your folds and pointing it against your entrance as if his tongue was fucking you. “so good..” you moaned with your fingers through his long black locks.

beomgyu could feel something stir him up. you’re words of praise running through his mind constantly as he pleased you harder and harder. his hip rutting against the sheets knowing his precum was dirtying them up just a bit. you tasted so fucking good, better than he imagined remembering the times he got off to the thought of you riding his face. again, he thought you were just attractive, not anything else, but the more he lied to himself the deeper he dug himself into a hole, a hole only about you. your hips rutted against his face feeling the rope about to snap any second now. “gonna cum— aaah fuck please can i cum..?”

curse words ran through the pretty boy’s head. you were begging. begging? begging only for him and asking for his permission. he flattened his tongue against your bud, thrusting his middle and ring finger inside of you trying to draw out your release. hearing his name in the most explicit and vulgar way made his head go blank, only focusing on you and your heat. you gripped the roots of his hair as your abdomen tensed up from your release painting his fingers white. your hips rolled against his fingers, riding out the rest of your nut. your walls twitched against the pads of his fingers as he curved them up hitting your sensitive spot. you sucked in a tight breath of air once you got a shallow wave of that familiar build up. beomgyu pulled his fingers out from you, eyeing his coated fingers with hooded eyes. every intrusive thought hit him telling him to lick it clean, nothing could go to waste. tongue making contact with his fingers making him whine at the taste. his tongue flattened against his own digits then wrapping his slick lips around both fingers. you watched him closely, watching how the same lips that were devouring you alive work on his very own fingers. you gasped at the sight, unintentionally reaching your hand down to your wet core. you slowly pressed against your bud circling it around with just your middle finger already feeling how sensitive you were. it was swollen from the abuse but throbbing for some more.

beomgyu’s eyes drifted to your hand, watching it work against your clit and causing your cunt to clench around nothing, winking at him for it to be filled up once again. “you’re so slutty, princess..” he teased quietly loud enough for you to hear. so stupid of him. stupid of him to use that nickname he’s called you for years, ever since you two became friends. now, hearing him say it in the same sentence as ‘slut’ made your head spin. you moaned at his words adding another finger to your menstrations, circling your clit a little harder and a little faster.

“yeah.. did you like that..?” he continued. he reached his hand down into his shorts, pulling them down to release his unbearably hard cock. it slapped his stomach, precum staining his tank once it hit. he let out a loud grunt once he felt the cold air hit his sensitive wet slit. his hand wrapped around the shaft, using his thumb to collect the precum and rub it around it. “fuck…” his head flew back showing a beautiful view on his adam’s apple bobbing up and down. his hand moved faster, trying to keep up with the pace of your fingers.

this wasn’t enough.

both you and him craved for one another’s touch.

“gyu..” you whined. your stomach started to get tight. the build up was coming fast and seeing how pretty he and his dick was was going to send you over the edge. “i need you inside.. please.”

his ears rang at the sound of your voice and the words that fell within it. he felt like he was going to lose it, hearing you beg for him to fuck you. his dick throbbed in his palm wanting to be suffocated by your soft walls. he knew his eyes turned dark with lust, watching your cunt wink at him getting ready to be filled up with him. he let go of his dick and crawled over to you. he grabbed your wrist pulling it off of your clit and placing the fingers into your mouth. he watched how your eyes fluttered from the taste of yourself making the pretty boy bite his lip with them forming into a smirk. after he let go, he grabbed behind one of your knees, spreading you out more for him. he hovered over your heat collecting a heap to spit to lube up your cunt just enough for him to fit in. the trail fell from his mouth slowly and landed on your swollen bud then moved between your lips. “oohhh my god—“ you moaned, the sight too lewd for you… and him.

he gulped loudly at the view, the scene almost pornographic. his dick was basically screaming at him to just fuck you until you couldn’t walk to more, but he didn’t care. he was going to make this last long so it could burn into his memory and burn into yours. he grabbed his dick, rubbing the tip against your folds making both of you groan at feeling. he tapped it against your clit the proceeded to rub between your folds. you reached up to him wanting his chest on yours, wanting to be close, wanting to feel that weight on top of you. “you want me, baby?” he smiled. you nodded a yes grabbing on to his shirt to pull him closer. “so bad..”

your lips collided again, his tongue wasting no time to push into your mouth and take over. still holding on to his dick, he slowly pushed his throbbing tip in. you inhaled deep at the small stretch, sighing into his mouth. then he pushed in more and more causing you to break the kiss. you moaned feeling your core twist and turn at the delicious stretch. your faces still close, him watching your eyes roll in the back of your head from his dick. the corner of his lips turned upwards seeing the effect he had on you, knowing that he’s dreamed of having this effect on you and nobody else.

and the more he thought about it, in this very moment, he’s always loved you.

he couldn’t believe how much he denied that fact. infatuation? attractiveness? he felt like such an idiot knowing that it was something more than just those two words. the butterflies flew up from his stomach to his chest looking at your beautiful face contorting from pleasure. he pushed in just a little more, finally bottoming out inside of you. his mouth agape at the tightness from your walls. you were sucking him in completely, not letting him go at all. his grip on your leg got tighter, pushing it up just a little getting ready to give you everything you deserved.

he moved his hips slowly, giving you time to adjust to his size. a gasp fell from your lips indicating you were just fine. he placed another kiss on your lips, pulling himself out just a little then thrusting deep and fast into you. the pace wasn’t fast but it wasn’t slow either, hitting all the right places making you twitch underneath him. his hands pushed him up giving him room to go harder, caging your head in. “shit.. you’re so pretty..” he groaned. he could hear the wet noises you two were making together, and the skin slapping everytime you two connected. it was unbearable. the way your breast jumped under the shirt and how your thighs moved every time he drove into you, he couldn’t take it. he lifted your shirt up just a bit, only seeing your stomach. he placed one of his hand on your belly, pushing down as he continued to drive into you. “you feel me here, baby?” he pushed down harder, trying to feel himself fuck into you. you moaned at his question, turning your face towards his other arm, nodding your head as one of your hands held onto his arm. “yes yes…”

he started to fuck into you harder, feeling you clamp around him getting ready to release once again. he brought his body close to yours once more placing kissing on your jaw and the corner of your lips. “feel so good…” you moaned. beomgyu felt his heart drop at your words. his hips stuttered into you, bringing out a whine from you.

“again..” he murmured. his lips were close to yours, foreheads connect while both of your mouths are agape. “tell me i’m making you feel good.” you gulped at his demand, lifting your hips up and fucking yourself onto his dick. “i feel so good, gyu..” both you and his hips matched one another’s tempo, fucking each other nicely wanting nothing more than to cum together. beomgyu’s head was spinning. you cursed softly onto his lips. the pace he had once set earlier was starting to get more frantic, knowing he was going to cum soon.

your hands slipped under his shirt, grazing his nipples. the pretty boy sucked in a breath and stilled his hips for just a second. “holy shit…” he breathed. you bit your swollen lip and pulled his tank to the side to show his bare nipple. your thumb and index finger pinched the swollen bud while looking up at him with darkened eyes. his face was snuched up prettily, small sighs falling from him. “you’re doing so good, baby..” you praised. you replaced your fingers with your mouth, flattening your tongue to lick his nipple. the prettiest whine came from him, moaning your name high and submissively. you clenched around him as he slowly grinded his hips into you. “‘nna cum..” he moaned. you weren’t far from it either, you bit down on his nipple and clamped your cunt around him tighter wanting him to release inside of you. “fuck fuck fuck—“

his seed sprayed your walls, his dick twitching inside of you. he brought his hand down and circled your clit one last time, drawing the release out of you. your walls convulsed around him as you came on his dick.

you grabbed beomgyu’s face and kissed him passionately. your breaths tickling each other’s faces. while you two were kissing you felt something wet hit your face. “gyu?” you asked once you pulled away. his eyes were shining bright with tears as they streamed down his face. “awee baby,” you cooed. you two flipped to your sides as you held onto him tight. “i’m right here.” you kissed his cheeks and the corner of his lip. “you’re still such a baby.” you smiled at him as he tried to wipe the tears from his eyes.

“i love you,” he whispered. “i’ve always loved you.” honestly, you could feel yourself begin to cry too. your eyes slowly welling up with tears and finding it hard to hold the drops from falling. you smiled at him and placed a kiss upon his lips as your tears streamed down your face as well.

“i love you too, back then and now.”

#jaework #beomgyu #beomgyu smut #choi beomgyu #choi beomgyu smut #txt #txt smut #kpop #kpop smut #unicorp

2K notes · View notes

xxbimbobunnyxx · 4 days

Text

Introducing: The Sanrio Girlies

So this cute ass idea came to me to make readers based off the Sanrio characters and I kind of just ran with it. It turned into a whole ass little AU. I had so much fun doing this, it’s been a minute since I got lost in creating something for hours. I do have main pairings in my mind for all of them BUT they’re absolutely interchangeable. I can see them all together for different reasons. I have so much LORE about them so feel free to send me asks about this lil universe. I’ll def be posting more about them because they are my babies and I’m proud of them. Tag yourself, I’m Kuromi. (Yes I self inserted)

Kuromi Reader

Trashy Y2K emo princess. Rebellious kook whose parents never agreed with her style or life choices. Hates driving, she was born for the passenger seat. Acts super bitchy but under the surface is a die hard romantic. Has never had a day job. Kind of unhinged, she will slash your tires if you do her wrong. Halloween obsessed. Has an OnlyFans. Reads romance novels in her free time. Spoiled brat. Has a tramp stamp. She’s the friend that says she’s “really not going to get that drunk tonight” but ends up getting dragged out of the party because she’s more wasted than everyone else, trying to fight people twice her size. In my AU she is Rafe’s girl but I could also see her and Jj being together.

My Melody Reader

Cute lil bimbo core baddie. Kook but spends all her time with the pouges. She grew up with rich her grandma who taught her everything about baking, sewing, and being a lady. Shops till she drops. Total empath. She loves doing things and buying things for the people she loves. The sweetest person you’ll ever meet until you mess with someone she cares about. Loves all things pink. Extremely smart despite her outward appearance. Neat and tidy. She thinks she’s responsible but she goes shopping at least twice a week, doesn’t have a job, and party’s every weekend. In my AU she is John B’s girl But I could also see her being with Rafe.

Batz Maru Reader

Total grungy tomboy. Pouge. Super sarcastic. Has a bunch of tiny little tattoos. Loves horror movies. Skates. Plays video games. She has hardcore mommy issues but has a bad ass metal head dad who owns an auto shop where she works. She’s always up to no good. If it’s not spray painting her literal name on shit and skateboarding on private property, it’s getting stoned out of her mind and blasting music so loud the whole neighborhood hears it. She’ll never tell anyone she has pink lingerie under all of that either. Batz is 100% Jj’s girl but I could also see her being with John B.

Keroppi Reader

She’s a multifaceted girlie. She’s a total boho beach bum but even when she’s on the beach she’s studying. Sporty. Played almost every sport in high school and was always the top of her class. Pouge. Total yogi. Going to school to be a veterinarian. Kind of a health nut, watches what she eats all week but let’s lose on the weekends with the girlies. Down to earth lover girl. She’s always there to listen when you need her and gives the best advice. Even if she is a little blunt about it. In my AU she is Pope’s Girl but I could also she her being with John B.

Cinnamon Roll Reader

Coquette soft girl. Shy and quiet until you get to know her. Professional Ballerina. Loves baby blue so much it’s part of her personality at this point. Kook. She grew up spoiled and sheltered so she’s a little clueless sometimes. Definitely has a planner and a strict daily routine. Loves to snack even though her ballet instructor tells her not to. Self care queen. Cry baby. Spends most of her time practicing for recitals and day dreaming. Cinna is kind of a wild card, I couldn’t decide who to pair her with, my first instinct is to make her Rafe’s girl but I could also see her and Jj being a polar opposite couple that balance each other out.

#rafe Cameron x reader #rafe Cameron concepts #outer banks blurb #Jj maybank x reader #jj maybank concept #rafe cameron blurb #pope x reader #Pope Hayward concepts #john b routledge #john b x reader #John b concepts #John b blurb #rafe Cameron #jj maybank #Sanrio!Readers #Sanrio!Girlies #dolly writes

60 notes · View notes

georgie-weasley · 5 months

Text

Grinch Young R.L. x GN!Reader

Warnings: swearing, mentions of depression, mentions of poverty, and just disliking Christmas

Word Count: 2.8k

Pairing: Young!Remus Lupin x Gender Neutral Gryffindor!Reader

Summary: Christmas was quickly approaching and everyone was excited but you. As the residential Grinch you were not looking forward to the holiday but turns out Remus Lupin is a Grinch as well.

A/N: Hello all! This is my first fic back after a break and I'm really glad to be back. Thank you to everyone who is still reading my stories and I love you all. Also this was inspired by my disliking of Christmas so I projected on the reader and Remus a smidge.

Masterlist Taglist

Christmas had exploded around Hogwarts. Pine trees were set up in just about every corner in every single room in the castle. Trees were taller than most of the students and covered in brightly colored baubles and tinsel and magic balls of light that changed color every minute. Garlands and wreaths covered the stone walls and the smell of gingerbread followed the students everywhere they went. The suits of armor broke out into Christmas songs and danced anytime someone passed by. The Great Hall was by far the most decorated part of Hogwarts with festive table runners, stockings hung on the fireplace, large real snowflakes on every surface enchanted to never melt, and the magical ceiling was snowing. It was horrible.

You had never been one to get into the Christmas spirit. The songs were annoying and wormed their way into your brain and never left. The decorations were everywhere and followed you around, literally while at Hogwarts. People were just insanely obsessed with Christmas and overly happy. They were happy to the point of it being creepy and fake and weird.

Possibly the worst was just how excited all of your friends seemed to be. James Potter, sunshine incarnate and your best friend, loved Christmas. He loved everything you hated about it. In fact, James had been talking about Christmas since the beginning of November and he never let you escape it.

“Happy 10th day of Christmas Y/N!” James’s bright and cheerful smile popped up between you and your book. The sudden appearance of his face made you jump, smacking him a little with your book.

“James! You absolute asshole! I’m trying to read.” You huffed and shoved him away as you tried to turn back to your book. The common room was quiet and the perfect place to read until now.

James only rolled his eyes and wedged himself into the miniscule space between you and the arm of the couch. “You know there is an entire couch open? Actually the whole common room is open but you had to sit practically on my lap?”

“Well yeah,” James chuckled as he tore the book out of your grasp and fully moved himself onto your lap. “I have to tell you what I want for Christmas! This year I want Lily Evans to date me.”

“Fat chance buddy. You’ve been wishing for that since you were 13. Give it a rest.” With one hard push, James fell off of your lap and onto the rug with a loud thud. “Besides, don’t you know you don’t get your Christmas wish if you tell it to the Grinch.”

James just looked at you with a wild smirk. “Then I suppose I’ll have to sing a song to reverse the curse!” He then burst into song, singing the Twelve Days of Christmas at the top of his lungs. You clamped your hands over your ears but nothing managed to block out the horrible sounds coming from James until the portrait opened and a figure sped by and body slammed James.

Sirius pulled James into a headlock while Peter quickly sprinted over and sat on James’s chest. “Please Prongs, we’ve talked about this. You can’t sing. Don’t ever try to do it again.” While James struggled to break free from Sirius and Peter, the fourth marauder sat in the open space next to you, his eyes already on his book.

You knew Sirius, Peter, and Remus but not like you knew James. Yes they were friends with your best friend but you never spoke to them unless it was for class or James made you. There was nothing wrong with the three of them. Actually, quite the opposite. You loved them and loved hearing stories about them but you never ran in the same circles. In fact, you didn’t see James as much as you used to either. You had grown up next door to him and as kids you two were always together. It’s not that you two aren’t friends anymore because clearly you are, you just don’t see him around as much.

James found Sirius, Remus, and Peter and never left them. You found your own friends and spent more time on your studies than James ever could. Sirius was fine and you waved to him in the halls. Peter would wave if he was with James or Sirius but not on his own. Remus never really acknowledged you. However, that never stopped you from looking at him. Since James had become friends with Remus Lupin, you were drawn to him. He was quiet just about all of the time but that didn’t mean he wasn’t sassy. You heard the way he would call out James and it was cutthroat. He was tall and handsome and rather mysterious in a way. Not to mention he was smart and was always seen with a book.

“Hey Grinch!” James's voice came from somewhere on the floor.

“What?” You and Remus both said. At the same time, you looked away from Remus as he looked away from his book to find James. Hearing Remus, you then looked at him while he looked at you.

For only a second, no one moved or spoke until James broke the silence. “Right, sorry. Forgot there’s two of ya. Moony?” Remus slowly tore his gaze away from yours to look at his friend who had continued speaking but you could hear none of it.

That was an interesting development. You had assumed James was talking to you since not only does he know about your distaste for Christmas but you called yourself Grinch not very long ago. But Remus also responded so Remus must also not be the biggest fan of Christmas. Otherwise, there would have been no reason for James to call him that or for him to respond.

The night slowly grew darker and while more and more students arrived in the common room, Remus never left the spot next to you. James, Sirius, and Peter eventually left to find some poor soul to bother but Remus remained, his nose still in his book. Honestly, it was making you a little nervous at this point. The man has hardly ever spoken to you since you were introduced back in third year. It's been three years since then and it wasn’t like you were much closer than before.

“You don’t like Christmas?” Remus mumbled, glancing at you out of the corner of his eye. He sounded almost disinterested.

“Yeah, I think it’s quite dumb to be honest.” You expected him to respond, like people usually do when having a conversation but he didn’t. He just hummed a little and went back to his book. “You don’t like it either?” If he wasn’t going to continue then maybe you would just have to make him. It brought almost a sense of hope thinking about the fact that maybe someone else wasn’t enjoying the season. You didn’t want someone to wallow around with but to have someone that wasn’t going to complain about your less than thrilled outlook would be really nice.

“I don’t. Never have.” Remus didn’t even bother taking his eyes off of his book as he answered. It could have been just your imagination but you thought you could just hardly see him smile. He suddenly closed his book and stood, his arm brushing yours in the process. Remus made it to the base of the stairs before he turned back around to look at you. “Hey Grinch.” As soon as you turned and he could see your face, he smiled. “See you later.”

---

At the Gryffindor table later that week, you had once again been minding your own business when James interrupted you. He sat across from you and smirked, reaching over to poke your arm. “Happy 14th day of Christmas, Grinch Number Two.”

“How come I’m the second?” You said with a roll of your eyes before you continued eating your breakfast.

“Because Remus is number one.” He said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Well, I disagree. I knew you first.”

James hummed and shrugged. “I’ll take that into consideration. Did you talk to him after we all left?”

“Did you set that up James?” You asked with narrow eyes.

“No, I just simply called him the nickname I always give him this time of year which just so happens to be the same as yours and I assumed he would mention something about it to you after. Did he?” He leaned forward, eagerly awaiting your answer.

“Yes.” James let out a cheer at your answer, getting him some weird looks from the whole room since he was so loud. Before you could chastise him for being so loud and obnoxious, Remus sat next to you. Which was very odd since before last night, he’s never sat next to you.

Immediately, James got up and moved further down the table to bother Lily. “Are you going home for Christmas?” Remus asked as soon as James was out of earshot. “The final day to sign up to stay here is Saturday.”

“Will you be staying?” You asked.

Remus nodded. “I stay every year.” He opened his mouth and closed it a few times before he evidently decided he didn’t want to say anything and kept it shut.

You could have gone home and while it would have been nice to be with family, you never actually stayed at the castle for Christmas. Now might be a good chance to do it. “I think I’ll stay. I go home every year; my family can survive without me for one year.”

He smiled and started adding food to his plate. “I’m glad you’ll be staying.” You were too busy trying to hide the blush on your cheeks to notice the blush on his.

---

As the holiday neared closer and closer, everyone got happier and happier. Well, everyone but you and Remus. While James and Sirius, who were also staying at Hogwarts, were planning a Christmas party and singing songs, you and Remus bonded over the opposite.

His least favorite song was We Wish You a Merry Christmas, he thought Santa was beyond creepy, and he found the smell of pine to be overpowering. You sat together at meals and laughed at people who were wearing festive outfits. He made you smile as he made faces behind peoples’ backs as they gushed over holiday traditions. On more than one occasion, he shoved James into a pile of snow when he was being too cheery. Remus Lupin was bringing you a lot of joy this season and you were not the only one to notice it.

James made it a point to tell you that this was the happiest he had ever seen both of you around this time of year. In fact, it almost looked like you were enjoying Christmas. You had scoffed at that and then proceeded to shove him into some snow but he did have a point. Remus was making you really happy and it's hard to be a grinch when you’re happy.

But it was nice being happy around the holiday and it was even nicer that Remus was the one making you so happy. You always found him attractive and you knew he was smart and funny but now you got to know just how sweet he was. Yes, he was poking fun at other people but he was doing it purely for your entertainment. He admitted one night after you two had made fun of a particularly ugly Christmas sweater that he never does this; he just liked hearing you laugh. Which made your insides turn into jelly and you couldn’t stop smiling. You also learned that he liked the same books as you and he was so passionate about reading.

He was extremely loyal to his friends and would do anything for them. He wasn’t great at expressing his feelings but he tried his best to let the people close to him know they were loved. He was brutally honest especially when it came to James and Sirius; he was always telling them how stupid they looked or when they were acting like idiots. You felt like a cliche Christmas romance movie but you were falling in love.

---

It was Christmas Eve and James had insisted all seven of the Gryffindors who had stayed needed to sleep in the common room. It was a tradition you two used to have as kids. The night before Christmas you two would sleep on the floor in the living room in front of the tree; you kept up with that tradition until you went to Hogwarts.

Of course before that, there was a party. It was nothing insane like the parties Sirius and James threw after winning a Quidditch game but it was still a party. There were snacks, drinks, games, and Christmas music, much to yours and Remus’s disappointment. You mingled for a while, which is more than Remus could say. He sat on one of the loveseats and only moved to grab more snacks. James tried to get him to play pin the nose on Rudolph but it was easy to guess how that went. While you also didn’t join in on the festive games, you stayed to watch. Sirius managed to get the nose perfectly on Rudolph which made James accuse him of cheating to which Sirius tackled him for ‘insulting his honor’. He confessed to cheating ten minutes later.

Many more games went on like that and after the fifth one, you found Remus still on the loveseat. As you approached, he moved so there would be more space for you. You sat in silence for a while before he spoke up. “Why do you hate Christmas, really?”

You had told him once you didn’t like the music and yes that’s true but it's not the only reason. “I guess I just don’t like how happy people pretend to be. There’s real genuine happiness like James but so many people aren’t happy. Life is horrible and nothing is going right but as soon as it's December, they pretend. It's ok to be unhappy during the holidays; you don’t have to pretend life is perfect just because it's Christmas.” You looked at Remus only to find him watching you. “Can I ask why you don’t like Christmas?”

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I never really had a good Christmas. My mom really struggled to be happy around this time of year, especially after…”

“After you became a werewolf?” His eyes grew wide and he started to shake. “No one told me,” you whispered and put a hand on his arm to calm him. “You just were always missing on the full moon and sometimes the day after. I figured it out. I don’t think of you differently.”

Remus took a minute to process the fact that you knew his deepest secret before he continued his story. “Yes, after I was bitten my mother was horribly depressed around Christmas. I think it made her remember everything and she couldn’t be happy. It also was harder for my parents to get money after since no one really wanted to be around us. I saw my parents struggle all month to save money to get me a gift. My mother especially would go without dinner just to waste money on some stupid toy. After seeing that, well it makes it hard to like Christmas.”

Your hand found his and you intertwined your fingers with his. “I’m sorry Remus.”

He shrugged a little and watched your hand as his thumb stroked yours. “It isn’t your fault. Actually, you’ve made this the best Christmas I’ve ever had.” He smiled and looked up at you, his cheeks a dusty rose.

“You’ve made this my best Christmas as well.” It was then something bumped your head, causing you to look up. Behind the loveseat was James who had tied some mistletoe to a stick and was holding it over your head. Remus followed your gaze and sighed, rolling his eyes. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“Do you want to?” Remus whispered. You knew James could hear every word you were saying despite him pretending not to listen but you didn’t really care.

“Yes.” You hardly finished the word before Remus leaned down and brought his lips to yours. Immediately your arms wrapped around his neck and brought him closer if it was even possible. His hands found your waist, lips moving against yours in perfect sync. Unfortunately, the kiss had to end so you could breathe.

Remus nudged your nose with his. “Now it’s the best Christmas ever.”

Taglist

@100gaysnails @weasleybuns @s1aaaaayyyyyyyt @steelthistle @jsjcue @Andy200700 @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @daisydark @creepybloodykitty2 @avatheveela @themarauderswife7 @mintyme101

#james potter #sirius black #remus lupin #hp marauders #the marauders #peter pettigrew #james & peter & remus & sirius #marauders #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin fanfic #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin x reader #hp fanfcition #hp imagine #hp fanfic #young remus x reader

117 notes · View notes

sualne · 8 months

Note

Sorry if you're already working on this but with Luffy in Croc dad what's his hobby?? Like he's the biggest ball of energy and I think if wasn't fighting wild animals as a kid he would vibrate into another dimension from lack of stimulation. Does he draw and develop his art skills, has he taken up music or is he invested with the void century with Robin? Croc wants to keep him inside and safe so what did he think would be best to entertain him or does he buy a new thing every week that Luffy says he suddenly wants to do. Yes he looks at books but is that it. Also sorry if you answered this before and I've missed waht you said, I am pretty sure I've seen all your comics on this but I haven't seen all your ask answering questions.

i hadn't gotten these questions and im so glad you ask!! :D

so! luffy doesn't have one specific hobby and croc does end up giving him whatever he wants when he suddenly gets a new obsession, one of the reason he's so excited with finding the jewelry box and getting a dagger is because it's finally something new! after that he gets really into rings and knives until it gets bored of it and switch to something else again.

about him and learning about the void century with robin i actually got a comic later for that so i won't say anything here!

im going to make this a list and explain how it goes, under read more:

Fighting: this luffy doesn't know how to fight, but he still love the concept! he gets really excited hearing stories of fights, duels, martial arts and all the rest! In practice though, since he's been so sheltered and only ever saw one real fight that ended up with people being killed in front of him as a kid, if (haha) he were to witness another real fight he wouldn't be as giddy about it as when he hears stories. he does also learn the tiniest bit of kenpo from bonclay!

Dancing: luffy in canon loves dancing (and partying), here too! he doesn't know/master any specific styles but likes to drag people into dancing with him, if no one is around he'll grab some of the smaller bananawani instead.

Singing: he's still very bad at it.

Music: croc noticed how he'd taps on thing and tried to get him to learn some percussion, unfortunately for him, luffy doesn't care about music theory and just does whatever makes him happy. he also love loud noises and croc has to find a way to stop him from making a racket at any hours of the day, it gets worse when luffy loses some of his hearing and needs to make everything even louder. eventually he gets bored of it too.

Cooking: him and croc cooks together pretty often, if no one is there to supervise him luffy will ignore recipes and common sense, making all kind of abominations. it's a miracle he never set the kitchen on fire.

Bugs: he loves them! he collect them! alive. croc is horrified one day when he finds out baby luffy has been letting some food to rot so he could observes flies and larvae going through their little bug lives cycle. later croc gives him those pinned dead bugs collection boxes thinking luffy will like it, he doesnt.

Board&Cards Games: he mostly has to play them by himself, he doesn't like being alone so he'll often ends up playing it "with" the banawanis. after he loses a few too many times against the banawanis and can't get croc to join in for the millionth time he gives up on them. even when robin joins baroques works he still expect her to be too busy to play with him and doesn't ask (she would have accepted if he had asked).

Art&Craft: he tries a bit of everything, doing it his own way meaning most of it is kind of hideous or about to fall apart, canon luffy is completely fine with that, au luffy though, he's having ton of fun at first but when he gets old enough to see that his dad cant quite fake his enthusiasm or interest towards his disastrous creations he gets frustrated and stops for a while. later, robin finds an old drawing of his and thinks its cute so he start doodling a little again for her.

basically, he struggles keeping a hobby, some like fighting, dancing, bugs and staring at pictures in geography books he keeps through his life but mostly, he's very lonely and bored out of his mind, he's depressed, that's not something that can be helped for as long as he's isolated.

when robin becomes a part of his life everything gets better for him! she spends time with him, read stories for him, helps him get out more often, they even meet bonclay and for a few years he's genuinely happy.

#crocau ask #crocodad au #<- this one gets in the main tag cause this is important lore #i probably wont be able to show all of that in comic form so im glad i get to rant about it here!! it also turned out sadder than i expecte

212 notes · View notes

wen-kexing-apologist · 6 months

Text

IS BROTHER ANURAK THE ONE ARMED MAN?

OKAY! SO!

I feel like I am teetering on the edge of delulu for this fucking show, but…because I just wrote a post about the Left Hand Path and all the left hand/left side imagery, and because I’m…well, me, and hands in shows are My Jam. When I was watching the promo trailer for Episodes 8-14, I noticed something. I never once saw Brother Anurak’s left arm. So I went to the teaser trailer for the whole show, just to see if it was coincidental that the like 5 seconds total of screen time Brother Anurak had in the Part 2 trailer just happened not to show his left arm…but uh…

Brother Anurak holds his rosary with only his right hand…

And Brother Anurak’s left hand just hangs at his side, rather than resting on his lap like his right hand is doing…

And Brother Anurak is shoving Trin with only his right hand…

And Brother Anurak’s left hand is hidden from view by some books…

And this, naturally, started me thinking about the One Armed Man. We don’t know much about this man, only that lost his left arm in an accident and then engaged in some homosexual and substance use activity, he was arrested and executed. We know that Dan, after losing his lucid dreaming stone, had some sort of dream or vision about this one armed man.

We do not know what purpose he serves to the story yet, we do not know if he is truly evil or just presented that way by the villagers. I mean, if the One Armed Man truly is a wild ghost, the Venerable Monk gave a few theories himself: a) The wild ghosts in the village got angry when the school was built and floating bodies down the water in sacrifice was banned after World War II or b) the wild ghosts take those who ask them for help, and who they like.

And we do not, currently, know the One Armed Man’s identity. Or…do we, cause you see, I was thinking about the fact that in just these trailers alone, I had not seen a single instance of Brother Anurak using his left hand.

And so…I did what any completely reasonable, totally non-obsessed, definitely completely normal human being would do….

…and spent the last few hours watching every single scene that involved Brother Anurak in Episodes 1-7 to see if he ever uses his left hand. (I don’t have photo evidence for all of these because trying to screen shot them all would be impossible but, trust me or you can verify for yourself. I also recognize this is a lot, so you’re welcome to just like, choose at random which ones you read).

Episode 1

Welcoming Dan The first time we meet Brother Anurak is when Dan first steps foot on campus. Anurak is the person who gives Dan the school tour and walks him to class. When Dan arrives, he does the traditional ‘wai’ hands that we have come to expect of any Thai show, that is, he presses the palms of both of his hands together when he says hello. Brother Anurak, whose arms are both tucked behind his back, does not return the ‘wai’ and instead just nods. When Rerng, the groundskeeper, runs in to Dan and Anurak, he does the ‘wai’ hands at Anurak and uh…once again Anurak just nods, he does not return the ‘wai’. When he introduces Rerng to Dan, he gestures at Rerng using only his right hand. Otherwise his hands remain tucked behind his back out of view.

Rescuing Dan from Anan We are introduced to Anan in the locker room where he immediately establishes his Utter Irrepentant Douchebag status and tries to control all the boys. Anan comes in at some point and puts a stop to Anan’s hazing, and you don’t really see his body at all, the camera mostly focuses on close ups, but if you watch closely you can see only his right shoulder moving because he’s gesturing with his right hand. His left shoulder stays relatively still.

Talking to Dan about the Shadow

Brother Anurak has been working with Dan and his mother since Dan was about 7 years old. When Brother Anurak is talking with Dan in his office after his first Shadow dream, you can see Anurak’s left hand stays staunchly at his side, he does everything in this scene with his right hand.

Visiting Dan in the infirmary Dan spent the night in his dorm away from his dorm…the infirmary, after he faints in class. Brother Anurak comes to visit him, and both of his hands are hidden by the bed for the entire scene.

Episode 2

Finding Dan at the lake At the end of Episode 2, Dan collapses near the lake while coming face to face with the Shadow. Anurak and Rerng find Nai and Dan, and Rerng helps Nai carry Dan, Anurak takes the flashlight from Rerng with his right hand and that is his full contribution for Getting Dan Out of There.

Talking to Nai When Brother Anurak is scolding Nai about being off school grounds with Dan, his hands are once again hidden behind his desk, and he only gestures with his right hand.

Visiting Dan in the infirmary → transitions to his office

Brother Anurak is standing on Dan’s right in the infirmary when he wakes up after his collapse at the lake. Once again, Brother Anurak’s hands are hidden behind the bed, so you can’t see them, and then when, out of nowhere, Dan and Anurak are talking in Anurak’s office, his left hand is hidden behind the arm of his chair.

Dan wakes up from his dream

During their office session, Dan is shunted out of his dream and realizes that he has been in teh infirmary the entire time, and was not actually in Brother Anurak’s office at all. What has snapped him out of his dream is Brother Anurak shaking him awake, but… he is only using his right hand.

[Side Note: I am taking careful notice of the fact that Dan’s ability to remain present and conscious in reality seems to slip often when he is in Brother Anurak’s presence. Then again, he also sees the Shadow a bunch when he is around the theater teacher, but I have already looked at his hands, and his left hand is real and he does use it so I at the very least I don’t think he has any relationship to the one armed man.]

Episode 3

Dan, Josh, and Nai are punished for coming back late. At some point, Anurak appears to observe, but not deliver, the caning of Dan, Josh, and Nai for missing curfew after going to see the Venerable Monk. We get a wider shot, which means Anurak’s left hand is visible, but it is held in exactly the same position it always is, and he continues to only gesture with his right hand.

Telling Dan not to wear the ring Brother Anurak runs in to the boys in between classes, and he notices the lucid dreaming stone around Dan’s neck. Anurak reminds him that accessories are not allowed in school, and while standing there, his left hand still in the same position it has always been in, and he only points to Dan’s necklace with his right hand.

Teaching class

Brother Anurak is writing on the white board with his right hand, this in and of itself is not all too suspicious because he could just be right handed, but when turns to face the class, his hands are covered by the students so you can’t see either one of them. He moves to the podium and his left hand, which continues to hang at his side, is hidden behind the podium, so we can’t see his left hand. But he places his right hand on the podium, and whatever brief glimpses of the left hand we see when it peeks out the side of the podium, it is in exactly the same position as it always is.

Episode 4

Grabbing Dan from his room to take him to visit his Dad When Brother Anurak visits Dan and Josh’s room to bring Dan to the hospital to say goodbye to his father, not only is Anurak’s left hand hanging at his side, but he is shot from the right side of his body so any potentially visible part of his left hand is hidden by the open dorm room door.

At the hospital Anurak is standing on Dan’s father’s left hand side, making his left hand visible… in exactly the same position it always is, his fingers never even twitch. When Anurak leaves the room to give Dan some time alone with his father, he uses his right arm to comfort Dan even though his left arm is closer to Dan’s shoulder.

Outside the hospital room, after the flashback to Dan’s homelife Left hand visible, in exactly the same position it always is, cut to talking to Dan outside the hospital room, his left hand is hidden between his legs. We get the best close up we have had of Anurak’s left hand and it is too smooth, and is lacking in any pores or spots, and it’s weirdly shiny. (Unfortunately like the one above, the way my computer works for screenshots, the play bar covers the part of the screen I would need to take a photo of).

Flashback to Anurak talking with Dan’s mother

When we see Anurak interacting with Dan’s mother, because she was his patient, his left hand is visible, still in the same position. AND HOLY SHIT, ANYONE READING THIS, YOU NEED TO GO TO TIME STAMP 18:27 AND WATCH HOW BROTHER ANURAK STANDS UP FROM HIS CHAIR. THAT LEFT HAND IS FUCKING FAKE. IT’S FUCKING FAKE!!! He gives the rosary to Dan’s mother with his right hand.

Dan’s mother’s funeral Anurak is sitting on a bench outside the temple, and we only see him after Dan drops the coin he has leftover from buying ice cream, and it hits Anurak’s right foot. We pan out into a wide shot, and Anurak’s right side is visible. Both his hands are in Anurak’s lap but his right hand is covering his left hand so we can’t actually see it. Then, Dan sits on his left side so we never

Baby!Dan sees the Shadow and Anurak comforts him

Shortly after his mother’s death, Dan wakes up in the middle of the night and sees the Shadow looming over him. He runs screaming from his room, at which point Brother Anurak appears on the stairwell. (What he is doing in their home after Dan’s father accused his mother of sleeping with Brother Anurak, is beyond me but I digress). Brother Anurak’s right arm is hugging Dan while his left arm stays at his side, in the same position it always is

Right before Dan fights his father

Dan’s Father’s funeral Anurak comes up to talk to Dan at his father’s funeral, and as he does he places his right hand on Dan’s shoulder. Left hand? Does nothing, as usual.

Episode 5

Dan confronts Brother Anurak

We get the scene from the trailer where Dan tells Brother Anurak that he thinks Trin was murdered after seeing the visage of Trin’s dead body in the pool. This is one of my favorite instances of the hidden left hand, due to the creative use of binder placement. You get a little bit of skin from Brother Anurak’s right hand because it is further away from the camera, but in the foreground? We are not entitled to see what Anurak’s left hand looks like.

Flashback: Talking to Trin in his office after his Student President Win

After Trin wins the student body president race in a unanimous vote, he is taken first to the Headmaster’s office and then to speak with Brother Anurak about the policies he hopes to institute (read: the traditional systems Trin is hoping to change). Like always, both of Brother Anurak’s hands are initially hidden behind his desk, but as he gets more engaged, more serious about the conversation at hand (haha) he leans forward and he only brings his right hand on the table.

Anurak gets a phone call about Trin’s medical records

I don’t remember if this is the first phone call where Anurak is told that Trin had bipolar, was off his meds, and was treating his bipolar with narcotics, or if this is the second phone call where Anurak is calling an unknown person, angry because he didn’t know how Trin’s medical records got leaked to the press. Either way, and in both cases, he answers the phone with his right hand, and never uses his left.

In his office with Trin’s parents

Trin’s parents (one of whom is an MP) are naturally, pissed that Trin’s medical records got leaked and storms over to the school threatening to sue. Brother Anurak speaks with them in his office, and he offers them tea, using only his right hand, his left isn’t even in frame.

And while he is speaking with Trin’s parents, trying to calm them and sort things out, he once again, only puts his right hand on the table. His left is hidden from view.

In his study, listening to old recordings of his sessions with Trin Anurak is thinking more about Trin, and digs out old files of his using only his right hand to pull the files out of his cabinet. When he sits in his chair to listen to the audio tapes, his left arm settles in to the same position at his side as it always is when he’s in that chair, and he hides the hand very quickly underneath the file folder when he opens it.

Episode 6

Brother Anurak does not have a lot of screen time in Episode 6, but he is at the student org fair where he meets the husband of the homophobic teacher that is sleeping with Anan. And here again, the people he is with all do the ‘wai’ hands, while he just nods.

Episode 7

Taking Dan from the headmaster’s office after Anan beats him up

Dan is the unfortunate victim of Nai’s decision to blackmail Anan, and gets beaten up once again. He and Anan are called in to the Headmaster’s office to talk about what happened as Dan left the Funhouse, when all of a sudden Brother Anurak appears, asking to take Dan away since Dan is under his care. Brother Anurak’s left hand is visible, but it is once again, still held in the same position, and his right hand is the one he is using to place a comforting hand on Dan’s shoulder.

Talking to Dan in his office

We reach the final scene with Brother Anurak in the first half of the show, before the One Armed Man is introduced to the story. And it is, once more, the same deal as it has always been throughout the entire show so far. Brother Anurak’s left hand is sitting at his side, in the same position is has literally never changed from. And then he is gone from the rest of the episode, so we don’t have any visual reminders that he exists while the One Armed Man is being introduced and discussed. I have gone through every scene, I have watched to see if his fingers even twitch. They do not, his left hand, whenever it is in view, never moves. You cannot convince me at this point that Brother Anurak and the One Armed Man aren’t connected somehow. This man does not have an actual left hand.

I do not know if Brother Anurak is the One Armed Man, if he is the scapegoat for the One Armed Man, if he is possessed by, a reincarnation of, or a legitimate ghost of the One Armed Man we learn about at the end of the episode. I do not know what the Shadow is, what it wants, if it is malicious, neutral, or good, I do not know what the ghosts of Trin or those two boys want, who the dead bodies are, what happened at this school. I don’t know any of it, I don’t know if all the pieces of the puzzle we need to figure it out have been revealed yet.

But the one thing I do know, is that Brother Anurak does not have a left hand, and the level of detail that the show has done to both reveal and hide that is truly fucking impressive. Utt Uttsada who plays Anurak is doing a fucking phenomena job. I do not know how much time and effort went in to consciously never moving that arm. Like he has not once, not ever moved it. His shoulder remains completely still, his arm swings precisely as much as someone with no lower limb to control will swing. He has to be wearing some sort of prosthetic glove to keep his hand exactly in place, to make sure that his fingers don’t twitch.

It is so incredibly clever to hide his hand like this. To give us enough glances at his left hand from a distance so we don’t question it. I mean, we see his hand, right? We see it is there, it looks real, and there are so many other things to figure out about what the fuck is going on, that the last thing in our minds is the fact that Brother Anurak never uses his left hand.

Anyway, I don’t even know if this will end up being BL, but I need the entire rest of the BL fandom to deal with the occasional jumpscare and creepy smiles and stares and watch this show, so that I can scream about this with more people. Because holy fucking shit, if this show maintains the quality it has given me with the first half of the story all the way to the end, it might make a last minute grab for Show of the Year for me, with how intentional it has been.

#clown checkpoint #screaming crying throwing up about this show #shadow the series #I NEED MORE PEOPLE TO WATCH THIS FUCKING SHOW IMMEDIATELY #PLEASE #I NEED MORE PEOPLE TO SCREAM ABOUT THIS SHOW WITH #wka long post #singto prachaya #fluke natouch #utt uttsada

133 notes · View notes

letteredlettered · 4 months

Note

Hi Im sure you answered this already but i sadly cant find it: how did end up shipping or rather writing drarry fics?

I've actually been asked quite a few times why I ship H/D. I never answer, because it's complicated and long and I have an essay on the subject, so I'll answer the 'how' question without addressing the 'why'.

Once upon a time, the internet was becoming a thing that people used regularly. The news kept talking about how the youths of the day were "surfing the 'net" and this was going to be the new normal. As usual, I could not identify with the 'youths of the day,' even though I was one. What could possibly be of interest to me on the internet? Reading books was far better than talking to other people. Then one day in my senior year of high school it dawned on me that you could possibly talk to other people about books, something I had never done before, as I didn't know anyone but my parents and brothers who ever read for fun, and my parents and brothers did not like to read things like Jane Austen. What if there were people on the 'net who liked Jane Austen??? Seemed fake, but I gave it a try.

The first Jane Austen website I found was Republic of Pemberley, which hosted something they called "Bits of Ivory." Through the "Ramble" board on Republic of Pemberley, I found out that there were "Bits of Ivory" elsewhere. It was called fanfic and hosted on fanfic.net.

Almost all of it that I was introduced to was Harry Potter fic, as HP was the megafandom of the time, and my Sense and Sensibility friend was obsessed with Snape, mainly because of Alan Rickman. I was also obsessed with Snape, though I must say that even though I had been obsessed with Alan Rickman since 1995, I never did like his casting as Snape and still don't. Anyway, I ended up getting interested in Snape/Hermione fic, and continued to be interested on and off for over the next five years.

I should pause at this moment to say that I had been writing fanfic since the fourth grade. I didn't know it was called fic. I didn't know other people did it. It never occurred to me to share it. When I found "Bits of Ivory" it actually took me a while to process that the stories there were in a similar vein to the stories I had been writing all my life, stories based on fiction by other people. It was just so wild to me that anyone would share that stuff, as though other people would want to read the different endings that they came up with, the self-inserts and the cross-overs they came up with.

I should also take this moment to say that I didn't really have slash ships. I was aware that slash existed, and I thought it was great. Sirius/Remus was a background ship everywhere at the time, and even though I didn't really see it in canon and wasn't terribly interested in it, I thought it was a nice thing. And when I started getting into X-Men through Wolverine/Rogue, it seemed obvious to me that Professor X and Magneto had a past sexual relationship. I, in fact, had an original story that I'd started writing in eleventh grade that had similar tension between two male characters, and the idea that they were in love and unable to have sex about it explained so much. And I wrote more original stories in college that were gay.

I think my problem was that the canons I was consuming were quite straight, and while I wasn't obsessed with writing canon-compliant fics, I was (and still am, to some extent) obsessed with writing characters who were true to canon. At the time sexuality seemed some kind of immutable thing to me that was deeply a part of who a character was. Also, sex to me was very Other; it meant something really deep and serious about you that obliterated other things you were. For instance, I was frustrated with all the Frodo/Sam porn, because I felt it obliterated their beautiful friendship and made their relationship about sex and being gay rather than the deep pure bond of friendship. So I was maybe kind of homophobic and confused.

Then I fell in love with Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and while that canon has a lot of heteronormativity, it not only has a character who thought she was straight who realizes she's gay, it also has vampires who have lived for centuries and who have broken every kind of social norm that exists. It seemed silly to me to assume that Spike or Angel were straight, which is how I began shipping Spike/Angel, which is how I got absolutely obsessed with slash. It was so liberating to write porn where the power dynamic wasn't influenced by centuries of patriarchy! It was so liberating to write porn where I didn't have to think about my own anatomy or gender or position in a sexual dynamic! It was so liberating to write porn with a bunch of dicks!

Having discovered slash, I turned back to ye olde faithful fandom, which had ten billion fics about everything. I'm not sure I even tried Sirius/Remus, because I was still so uninterested in it, but now I read all the Snape slash, the majority of which seemed to be Harry/Snape. The thing is, I don't ship Harry/Snape. It can be very hot! But while the porn is fine and some of the stories are fun, these are not two people that I want to live happily ever after. I just think that the power dynamic between them, the history they have, and the personalities they are do not make me want to imagine them as a couple with a happy marriage who occasionally have the friends over for games of Quidditch and Exploding Snap. And while I like queer complicated, angsty stories, I also like a happy ending in a semi-heteronormative sense, especially for Harry Potter, who really seems to want one. So, I started looking for other Harry Potter slash.

I knew that Harry/Draco was a juggernaut pairing, but I just hated Draco Malfoy so much. I honestly could not stand him. I used to go about saying that I hated him not only as a person (like, I also hated Snape as a person; he's a dick, and he's cruel to children! But he's a great character) but as a character. I just didn't like the function he played in the narrative. I like big, dramatic rivalries and evil vs good; meanwhile, Draco Malfoy is a little worm. So I kept thinking about reading HP slash, but resisting.

Then, one day, I was sleeping on the couch, and woke up suddenly with the idea that Draco Malfoy could be reformed. He could be sorry for all the shitty things he's done! He could be really apologetic! He could be really trying to make up for his past, and Harry could find this truly beautiful, and they could have sex about it!

Surprisingly, it was hard to find fic about this. For some reason, in most of the fic, it was Harry having to earn Malfoy's approval, instead of the other way around, which I found absolutely bonkers. But I eventually found Eclipse, by Mijan, which was just what I wanted. Then I was obsessed and was reading every Harry/Draco fic I could find.

Eventually, I even read the ones in which Harry was a cad and Draco Malfoy was a perfect snowflake who never did anything wrong. And then I started finding fics that really emphasized that Draco had a very different point of view of what happened, which showed that he really had no way to understand who Harry was, or what Harry had been through. In these fics, Harry had to do some work to understand Draco, which is what really sold me on the pairing. I still want fics in which Draco has to do a lot of heavy lifting to address his past and deal with the hurt he has caused and the violence of his previously genocidal outlook, but I love it when Harry, too, has to adjust. After saving the world and losing most people he loves and protecting the innocent and doing his exhausted little best to be honest and righteous and true, Harry Potter still has to do work, again, to overcome his past and find a peaceful life. And that's what made me start writing Harry/Draco, the end.

#harry potter #draco malfoy

121 notes · View notes

howlsmovinglibrary · 4 months

Text

Top 5 Books of 2023!

I don't know if this blog even counts as a book blog anymore, but this year I read 60 books, which is twice as many as last year (and therefore also double my 2023 Reading Goal). I'm so pleased to have overcome my three year reading slump that has plagued me since Covid, and wanted to celebrate by... yknow. Actually doing a book blog post lmao. So here are my five favourite books of 2023!

1) Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries by Heather Fawcett

Not only was this book written Specifically For Me (faeries, rivals-to-lovers, academia), I just think it's a really good example of a cosy fantasy that is well-written and well-paced. The vibes are wholesome and fanfic-adjacent, but that doesn't mean that nothing happens. I'm not a fan of the new 'cosy' subgenre generally, but I think this book combined the right amount of comfort with action.

2) The Thousand Eyes by AK Larkwood

I read the Serpent Gates duology this year, and while the first book was good, the second book was just overwhelmingly brilliant. I loved the way this author manages time and character development - we follow all the characters for decades of their lives, so the final heroic triumphs in each of their stories just... hit different. It was such a wonderful book series, that left me feeling inspired to write.

3) The Adventures of Amina Al-Sirafi by Shannon Chakraborty

I love Shannon Chakraborty's writing generally, but it was really fun (after the slowburn pining of the City of Brass books) to give her a far less pious and brazen heroine that resulted in an entirely different tone of story from her previous trilogy! I loved the narration and plot of this novel, also obsessed with this pirate milf and her demon boyfriend.

4) A House With Good Bones by T Kingfisher

I love T Kingfisher but I've never been able to get all the way through one of her horror books before - idk why, I just don't tend to vibe. But this book, which leaned more towards Gothic horror, twisted to fit a modern setting, was so gripping - I read it all in one sitting. I love the funky little bug archaeologist protagonist, who's first sign that her house is haunted is the fact that there are no insects in her mother's garden.

5) You and Me On Vacation by Emily Henry

I went on a beach holiday for the first time since Covid and proceeded to devour every single fucking book Emily Henry had ever written. Although I loved all of them, You and Me On Vacation was the one written Specifically For Me, which was surprising given that the other two most popular releases by her are about books (oh well...mutual pining, my beloved).

Special Mentions:

Wintersmith by Terry Pratchett

I read all of the Tiffany Aching books for the first time this year, based on a diagnosis from a pal that Wintersmith would be 'my' Terry Pratchett book. Reader, she was right... (which says more about me as a person than I'd like).

If anyone wants to give me any recs for good books they read this year, feel free to reply to this post!

#booklr #bookish posts #book tag #2023 reads #best books of 2023 #emily wilde's encyclopaedia of faeries #the thousand eyes #the serpent gates #the adventures of amina al-sirafi #a house with good bones #emily henry

78 notes · View notes

stvrdrops · 1 year

Text

the american actress pt 1 | pt 2 ☆ shuri x fem!reader

an invitation to the most lavish and private wakandan ball suddenly makes its way into your lap, despite you being only a regular old actress compared to the world leaders who usually attend. could it be the princess invited you herself..? surely not.

warnings : some implicit actions , fluff & cute flirting between the two !

word count : 2,861

note : this is the first shuri fanfic i’ve written after coming back from my terrible writers block so i apologize if it’s not the best lol i’ve just been so obsessed with her lately that i had to write something for her :)

wakanda is a kingdom of utter extravagance. ever since they opened up their walls they had begun throwing lavish balls and galas to keep the countries distracted from stealing vibranium. the world leaders saw it as an elite gala while wakanda saw it as a way to share their wealth without actually sharing. only the most classy and most important of people could even dream about attending the wakandan dances. the most famous of these balls being the wakandan international gala. something so simply named would have to be but a simple event, right? you would be incredibly mistaken. women dressed to the nines while men wore their most expensive designer suits. governors would discuss politics while tribe leaders ate and danced. princesses and daughters of government officials would gossip and flirt with the many men eyeing them down. most importantly, the avengers themselves would attend. they treated the night as one of their many vacation days from work. the black widow would forgo her iconic black suit, captain america would drop the shield for a glass of whiskey, tony stark would still bring his suit but only to show off, thor’s cape became a tuxedo, hawkeye managed to go without his bow, and bruce banner left the green man at home.

this was your first and what you thought to be your last time attending the infamous event. you were certain to be an outlier compared to the world’s most important people. you happened to be just a simple actress. you didn’t sign treaties or protect the universe. all you did was read off a script and perform some stunts for a living. it was safe to say you believed the invitation to be a mistake, but your agent assured you it was not. apparently you had been invited allegedly by someone with high wakandan authority. they had left their identity a mystery which drove you wild. it made you laugh to think the person who invited you was the princess of wakanda, shuri. you happened to form a crush on her some time ago after seeing her on tv discussing world politics. somehow she made the war over vibranium sound sexy and adorable at the same time. which was quite insane.

you often found yourself wondering if the princess had seen any of your movies. she was far too busy to sit down and watch some silly academy nominated films. after all, she was the princess of a whole nation and led only the best scientists all on her own.

you currently stood in front of large doors made purely out of vibranium. it was carved with thousands of little people telling the story of how wakanda was formed. the attention to detail had been nothing short of incredible. it was so incredible, in fact, that your breathing even hitched a little. you had never seen anything quite like that with its craftsmanship. yet again, you hadn’t seen anything quite like wakanda.

the trip to wakanda had been fairly short despite the long distance needing to be traveled. a limo showed up at your quaint loft in nyc right when the invitation said transportation would arrive. after that you were taken to what seemed to be an army base. wakandan jets were lined along as you watched others enter. they went in groups, while you had a jet all of your own. the next thing you knew was arriving in wakanda and standing in front of these doors. everything had happened so quick!

“ehem.”

your gaze shifts from the top of the door to the two women standing on both sides of it. you blushed out of embarrassment, the red on your checks too bright for your brown skin to hide. out of your astonishment you forgot the two women had even been standing there. they oozed poise and bravery. not to mention they were incredibly sexy.

somehow you felt underdressed when you stared at them. they were wearing their normal dora milaje gear, but still it matched the regality of the gala. you looked down at your thousand dollar gown and frowned a little. it had stuck to your body like a glove, showing off every curve. you felt a little self conscious due to the low back and high leg slit. it almost felt too grown for such an event, but your stylist assured you it would be the right choice for the occasion. so maybe you weren’t overdressed, but perhaps just feeling like you didn’t dress for the right kind of gala.

it made you feel so much older than nineteen. the black sparkles shined bright as the lights in the hall hit every single one of them. your dark stilettos positioned you higher than normal, but you were just of the same height as the dora milaje women. your hair had been done up in a bun style updo, showcasing your collarbones and soft neck. the makeup you wore was soft glam, and that was just how you liked it. you knew you were beautiful but the nerves of keeping up appearances was eating you alive.

you move closer to the door and smile to the two women. they do not reciprocate the smile, but you know they would if they could. their training probably prohibited them from doing such things at events like these.

spears hit the ground causing the large vibranium doors to open. it caught you by surprise seeing how easily the moved open despite how much they had to of weighed. once they opened it revealed to you just how many people were truly at this gala.

your eyes land on everyone below and grow wide at the realization that everyone is staring back at you. you even make eye contact with one of the avengers, natasha romanoff. you quickly turn your eyesight away out of embarrassment, however, it’s just your luck that your eyes land right on princess shuri right after. you could feel yourself freezing as a wide smile grew onto her face. she looked happy? like as if she was happy to see you attending.

“introducing y/n y/l/n, the american actress.” a thick accent shouts before the spears hit the ground again.

everyone’s eyes linger on you for a second while you make your way into the room. the doors close suddenly behind you. you can’t help but feel totally exposed. somehow being in front of a million people at a premiere is better than this, because at least you know those people love you.

music fills your ears as you see the band has begun playing again. people go back to normal as the music starts and you can’t help but let out a sigh of relief. you finally allow yourself to go down the stairs without the risk of tripping from your anxiety.

the room looked much smaller from above, but as you’re in the middle of it all you realize the room is quite large. you can’t help but allow your eyes to scan the room as you take in all the lavish decor and beautiful greenery. the walls were covered in flowers and vines native to wakanda. sculptures of panthers made purely out of vibranium lined the walls and the pillars reaching from out of them. dora milaje stood in little doorways towards the top of the walls, watching down on the guests.

the large glass roof allowed for the stars to shine so beautifully on your sparkly dress. it also helped to create the perfect atmosphere as people danced and laughed. it was just the perfect amount of light.

you hadn’t realized you made your way to the bar until someone tapped your shoulder with a sharp nail.

“are you lost?” a sultry voice spoke.

“oh,” you quickly turn yourself around to see the black widow standing in front of you. you find it hard to form the correct words, only saying, “i’m sorry.”

she laughs, “for what?”

“i- i just…” your mouth goes dry, “i guess i don’t know.”

“hm,” she raises a brow, “you’re just as pretty in person as you are in the movies.”

you gasp, “you watch my movies?”

“who doesn’t?” a thick wakandan accent speaks from behind you.

you feel your legs go weak when you recognize who’s voice it was. it couldn’t be, could it? you turn to the side and your eyes land on the princess of wakanda, shuri. she flashes you a charming smile and you can feel your face heat up once again. she’s not that much older than you, but she looked incredibly mature. she didn’t wear a typical dress, instead opting for a suit that had no under shirt. you could see the most modest part of her chest and how toned her collarbones were. it’s almost as if you could see her muscles underneath the suit. shuri could feel you undressing her with your eyes, but said nothing about it.

“you do not mind if i take my guest, do you romanoff?” shuri spoke to natasha while gripping your hand. the russian spy looked down at the hang gripping and then up again.

“not at all.” she said before going back to sipping on her incredibly dark red wine.

“come y/n, i must show you something.” shuri speaks while flashing another smile and dragging you away from the party. you’re far too starstruck to even say anything, only nodding as a response.

you’re lead through the many corridors of the wakandan palace before reaching the least guarded area in the whole place. the doors were white and looked futuristic. you watch as shuri begins to type some password into a keypad.

“you’re the princess”

ugh, you cant believe you’ve said that out loud.

“yes, i am.” she chuckles, “and you’re a famous american actress.”

“why does everyone refer to me as that? i have a name.” you cant help but frown.

“hmm, fine. i will refer to you as y/n, the princess of all american actresses.”

what a stupid nickname, but it sounded so cute coming from her that you couldn’t help but smile. she noticed this and beamed with pride. her little flirting had been working nicely.

“that works.” you joke with her. for the first time tonight you didn’t find yourself feeling anxiety.

“ah! here we are.” shuri speaks as the white door begins to open. it slides from both sides to reveal what seems to be the infamous lab. you don’t have time to register much of anything due to shuri dragging you inside and up some stairs to a ledge. she stops in front of a table covered in different little trinkets and inventions.

“forgive me princess, but what am i supposed to be looking at?”

“hm?” she looks up at you, tearing her gaze away from the table. “oh yes, hold on.”

you watch as she picks through the items.

“to be honest i didn’t know you knew of my existence.”

she laughs and you can feel butterflies forming inside you. your schoolgirl crush on shuri was truly getting worse and worse by every moment you spend with her. surely she could never see you that way though. hell, you didn’t even know if she was into girls.

“i watch every movie of yours. you are quite an incredible actress. which is why i wanted you to test these for me.” she says while handing you what seemed to be a pair of black glasses. they were the exact same frames as ones you wore in your last movie.

shuri sees you raising a brow at this realization and says, “i liked how well they complimented you.”

“i see.” you say as you hear the subtle cockiness in her voice begin to dwell. you couldn’t help but think about how much taller she was even in your heels. so to look up at her with the glasses on made you feel a bit silly. you enjoyed it though.

suddenly words appear in your eyesight. the glasses lenses turn into screens that display what seems to be a script. it tracks what you read and what you haven’t, highlights certain parts of the text for you, and seemingly more. your mouth can’t help but gape open at how cool it all is.

“did you make these?” a stupid question, but you had to ask.

“of course, with you in mind.”

“why me?”

“it gave me a good excuse to get you in my lab, and trust me, i needed to get you in here somehow.”

oh. my. god.

“why wait until this fancy gala?” you blushed as you spoke, still searching through the words on the lenses.

“i just wanted to see you in a pretty dress. i guessed you’d look amazing based off your premiere pics, but somehow it’s so much better in person. you’re so much better in person.”

suddenly you feel her hand resting on your hip. you don’t refuse her, and she can feel you’re enjoying the reaction. she took pleasure in knowing your hairs probably stood up under that tight dress from her finger tips. she lifts the glasses up, allowing for you to make eye contact with her. she was looking at you like you were the only person in the world. she was looking at you as if she wanted to devour you.

how suave.

“you are much shorter in person, but i prefer it this way. much easier to do this.”

“do what—“ you begin to ask, but unable to finish as a gasp escapes from your plump lips. shuri had lifted you up onto the glass table so easily that it caught you by surprise. you swore you could feel your heart beating out of your chest. your body aches for her and she could tell.

her fingers trail up the slit in your dress as you both hold eye contact. she smiles as they slip under the dress, finding your black panties. the space between you two becomes much less by every passing second.

“i should’ve flown you out to wakanda much sooner if i knew you would let me get this far. perhaps even request you film a movie here.”

“a movie? for the wakandans?”

she laughs, “no silly. our own personal movie. one that involves little clothing. i’m sure you’d be a natural at it since it involves no real acting.”

holy shit she’s good.

she leans in while keeping eye contact. you began growing impatient so you grab her face and push your lips into hers. suddenly the space between you is no longer existing. her hands are on your hips as you attempt to chase some kind of high.

shuri takes pleasure in knowing just how fast you crumbled beneath her. you two didn’t even know each other for two hours and here you were grinding yourself into her and the table trying to chase a high.

your hands dug into the curly hair on top of her head as she dove to your exposed neck. her nails dug into your skin when you pulled slightly on the hair. her teeth sank into your neck and you moaned from the contact. it was almost as if she was a vampire with the way she was sucking and biting on you. she just couldn’t get enough of how fruity you had tasted.

you couldn’t help but melt underneath her and turn into a mess as she pushed your legs up. she was incredibly charming and the best kisser you’ve ever had the pleasure of experiencing. this certainly isn’t what you had planned for the night, but it would do nicely.

“princess shuri—“

“not,” she came up from your neck and kissing you to speak, “now.”

“but—“

shuri ignored the voice speaking from the walls. you were too busy taking everything in to notice the voice.

“princess shuri!”

a voice booms through the lab and suddenly shuri is pushing herself off of you. you quickly fix your position to keep from falling off of the glass table as you realize someone other than the both of you was in the room.

“okoye, how many times have i told you to not enter when the doors are shut?!”

the woman only raises a brow as she looks between you and the princess. you give a weak but embarrassed smile. her expression drops into a slight smile when she sees shuri’s hand still on your waist.

“i apologize to break up whatever this is, but the queen is requesting your presence.”

shuri sighs, “i better not keep mother waiting.” she looks back at you and attempts to hide a smile from seeing how flustered you look, “i will be back. do not move a muscle!”

you can only find it in yourself to nod your head, already missing how good it felt to have her lips on your neck.

she hurries after okoye and the doors to the lab open.

“must you have sex in the lab?”

“we were not going to have sex okoye!”

“lying is not good for the soul shuri.”

“hmph. you know how long i’ve been crushing on her.”

“oh yes, you never shut up about her last movie. such a lover girl aren’t you? at least take the girl out on a date first.”

“maybe i will.” shuri states in a matter of fact manner.

the doors shut cutting off the conversation to you. however, you heard all you needed to hear, a smile spreading across your lips.

˖⁺｡˚⋆˙✧⋆｡°✩☼⋆｡°✩☽

#stvrdrops #fanfic #princess shuri #shuri #shuri fanfiction #mcu shuri #shuri x you #shuri/reader #shuri x reader #wlw #actress!reader & shuri

583 notes · View notes

space-writes · 3 months

Text

hello (again) writeblr! i decided to make a new intro that has all my current wips on it, since i have way more than when i first started out on here.

about me

I go by Space, my pronouns are they/he, and I’m in my third decade of existence, which is absolutely wild. I’ve been writing for most of it, so I like to think I’m pretty decent

I write mostly fantasy and erotica (sometimes at the same time), both original and fanfiction, and all of it's queer

You can find my work on my AO3 here, crossposted to my neocities here, and under my snippets tag

I’m open to tag and ask games, and my inbox is currently open to anything as well. I don’t always reply the fastest, but I’ll get to it eventually! (I don’t take part in chain asks, so please don’t send me them)

I use obsidian.md for all my writing, and it’s my favourite notes app ever, so I also talk about that occasionally. The tag for it is here, and I’m hoping to write some more showcases/tutorials this year!

my main goal is to actually finish some damn books and also to inflict my OC brainrot upon people. so far the second one is the only thing that’s actually happened, but i live in hope

My current wips are Chronicles of Valloroth (Renegade Prince being book one), Obedience, Obsession, and claws—summaries and links for all four are under the cut!

this is my writing sideblog, you can find my main @thespacelizard, and i follow/like from there

tag directory is here

current wips

Chronicles of Valloroth

⚔ Genre: Fantasy Adventure

⚔ Features: Queer cast, found family, A Whole Entire Dragon, magical mishaps, The Mere Concept of Doing The Right Thing, a grumpy assassin, a sparkly mercenary, knock-off tieflings, a handsome prince (he’s gay), more banter than your average dungeons and dragons campaign

⚔ Status: Book One: First draft completed, re-drafting in-progress || Books Two & Three: outlined

⚔ One Sentence Summary (Book One): A runaway prince seeks freedom in a new world and must find a way to convince a rag-tag group to defeat an ancient dragon, all whilst he is being hunted by a band of mercenaries and an infamous assassin.

⚔ Series Tag: valloroth blogging

claws

🩸 Genre: Queer Horror

🩸 Features: teacher/student relationship (university edition), toxic romance, gender fuckery, broken identity, demonology, murder, self-harm, obsession, stalking, infidelity, a lot of blood, pact-based magic system, corruption, jealousy, eldritch entities, love is a wound, body horror, attempted suicide, and a little bit of arachnophilia

🩸 Status: First draft complete!

🩸 One Sentence Summary: A young student’s obsession with his demonology teacher sparks a twisted romance that draws him to the limits of his humanity—and into the web of an eldritch horror.

🩸 Series Tag: wip: claws

Obedience

💜 Genre: Erotic Romance, D&D fanfiction (original characters, Forgotten Realms setting & loose 5E ruleset)

💜 Features: a variety of BDSM scenarios, one closed off wizard dom, one enthusiastic nerdy sub, weird uses for dnd spells, a painful amount of pining, somehow; worldbuilding, emotional slow burn, as much self indulgence as I can possibly fit in a fanfic series

💜 Status: Arcs 1-3 are complete (read on AO3 here, or my neocities here). The first book of Arc 4, The Perils of Wanting is currently in edits. The second book of Arc 4, as yet untitled, is on its second draft.

💜 One Sentence Summary: A D/s M/M series featuring two wizard boys, the kinky magic they get up to, and the feelings they definitely don’t have for each other.

💜 Series Tag: obedience fic blogging (it began on my main, so the tag there has more snippets)

Obsession

🕷 Genre: War of the Spider Queen/Forgotten Realms fanfiction, also Erotica, Horror and a smidge of Dark Romance

🕷 Features: OC/canon, a nightmare transmasc wizard boy, obsession, stalking, jealousy, violent impulses, dubious consent, possessiveness, evil gender dysphoria, incest, gore, the inherent horror of Having a Body, and occasionally actual school things happening at Sorcere

🕷 Status: Ongoing serial, which you can read on AO3 here, or my neocities here

🕷 One Sentence Summary: Pharaun Mizzrym is everything to Vizaeth Thaezyr. He’ll do anything for him—even if Pharaun doesn’t know it yet.

🕷 Series Tag: obsession fic blogging (it also began on my main, so check the tag there for additional content!)

#writeblr #writeblr intro #writeblr introduction #writeblr reintro #writing community #writing #writers on tumblr #writers #i did it i remade the intro!#everyone cheer and clap for me #anyway hello to all the people who've joined me here since i started!#thanks for listening to me incessantly post about my blorbos

41 notes · View notes

frannyzooey · 2 years

Text

In The Dark: 9

Ezra x f!reader

Rating: Explicit, angst

a/n: Thank you to @mourningbirds1 who gave me so much help with this chapter. She is one of the most insightful readers I’ve ever met in my life, and is endlessly patient with me. The lessons she’s been giving me in writing have been invaluable, and I am forever grateful for her. Thank you also to @charnelhouse and @krissology who read pieces, or the whole of this, and to @the-ginger-hedge-witch - the entire beginning of this one is for you, my love. ❤

Series Masterlist

Your ass is an obsession for him.

It has been right from the start, since the very first time you came over.

He used to fantasize about it - squeeze his aching cock in the tight fist of his own harsh hand while thinking about you; in the shower, in his bed at night.

He recalled memories of it, his eyes closed tight.

You, bending over to get something from the refrigerator.

You, crawling on all fours of his living room as you knelt and adjusted the papers around your laptop.

You, walking away from him or in front of him, or leaning over his sink in the kitchen or the bathroom.

Once, a glimpse of it when you wore an especially short skirt and reached for something in his cupboard.

That was during the days when he was still holding out, still denying his attraction to you even though he could tell you wore that skirt just for him. (You told him as much last week, and he made you put it on so he could fuck you in it.)

He still fantasizes about it, fucking his fist in search of relief when you’re not there, but now when he does it, he has the physical feeling of it imprinted on his palm.

The plush mold of it.

The lush weight in his grip.

The perfectly round globes that fill his hands just right when he squeezes you through your jeans, or through your underwear, or through nothing at all.

You know how much he likes it, and have worn special things just for him: thongs, cheeky underwear trimmed with lace, one time some extra short sleep shorts that didn’t even touch the bottom curve. All of those things drove him wild, but it was the innocent things that got him even harder.

The slow reveal of it underneath his t-shirt, when you faced away from him and stood between his spread thighs as he lounged shirtless on your couch.

The soft curve of it when you wore your more practical, innocently white underwear, the cotton almost transparent.

The rounded bend of it when you placed your foot on the edge of the mattress and smoothed lotion onto the lower half of your leg after showering.

He can never keep his hands far from it - always cradling it in his hold when he kisses you, pinching it when you walk in front of him, sliding his hands back and forth over the bare mound of it when you lay on your stomach in bed. He likes to grip it tight when he pounds into you from behind, likes to stroke himself in a slick, rapid beat until he comes in hot spurts across it. Likes to use his fingers to gather his own mess up and rub it into your tender skin like a balm after biting the bottom of it, likes to swat it just to see you jump before your mouth stretches into a grin.

He has bitten it more than once, to stake his claim with a visible mark and he feels for the spot now, in your straddle on his lap. His hand mapping your smooth skin, it slides down to cup your ass through your underwear, digging into the meat. His fingers push underneath the hem of them to touch your skin and you shift forward in his hold, spreading your legs wider as you kiss him.

He sighs into your mouth, your hand slipping down to cup him through the thin fabric of his briefs. He’s so warm down there, the juncture of his strong thighs surrounding your hand as you find the tip of his cock and circle it through the cotton, and his head falls back into the couch with a soft grunt. His hips push up, raising you slightly in your seat before he brings them back down.

“If we’re gonna do it again, I gotta eat.” His eyes flutter shut, your own fixed on his handsome face as his mouth goes slack and they drop down the line of his throat, watching his pulse beat strong under the tanned skin. You can feel it on your tongue if you try hard enough; your hand opening to gently stroke the hardening length of him and with a frown, he reaches down to pull your hand away.

He brings it to his mouth, his eyes still closed and brushing his lips against your knuckles, he gives them a kiss.

“I’m starving,” he smiles, finally looking at you.

“The usual?” you ask, and he nods.

Staying on his lap, you hold onto his arm while you bend back to pick your phone up off the coffee table and though he just told you he’s too hungry to think about fucking you again, his eyes stay on your body when you open the delivery app, his hands running appreciatively down your sides in a weighty drag.

Tapping in his usual order from the place down the street, the app says it’s been received. An email notification pops up at the top of the screen and you almost dismiss it, but when you see the subject line, you freeze.

[UNIVERSITY COLLEGE LONDON: ADMISSIONS]

“Holy shit.”

“What’s wrong?” He watches your eyes fix intently on your phone screen, the illumination of it reflected in your pupils as they read whatever it is you’re looking at. You look so serious right now, a worried frown appears between his dark brows while he waits.

“I can’t believe it,” you say, breathless. Your hand drops down onto your thigh, your phone now forgotten. Your voice is so quiet, he almost doesn’t catch it. “I got in. I got into the program.”

An immediate grin lights up his face, his arms wrapping around you to pull you into a hug and his bare feet dance on the floor, your body jiggling in his hold as you bump on his thighs. You return the embrace with a giggle, winding your arms around his neck and you’re smiling into the warm crook of it with excitement as he peppers rapid kisses against your temple.

“Congratulations, my Birdie,” he murmurs, his voice low in your ear. You stay in place, hugging the solid breadth of his body tightly and the grin slips from your face for a moment, thinking about leaving him. You push it away, hugging him tighter.

“Thank you,” you reply, your words slightly muffled.

Guiding you back so he can see your face, he cradles it in his hands, his thumb stroking the plump of your lower lip as he smiles up at you and even though your mind is racing through so many scenarios, you can’t help but match it.

“I just can’t believe I got in. I thought for sure they were going to turn me down, with how long it was taking.”

He shakes his head, a heavy frown settling in reprimand at your doubt. “Not me,” he answers, sure of his answer. Using his hold, he brings your eyes to his. “I knew you were going to get it.”

He’s quiet for a moment, the pride on his face sliding into something more solemn. It’s only there for a fraction of second before he reins it back in favor of something more resigned, yet happy, but that fraction of a second is just enough for you to see it.

“We’re gonna miss you.”

You say nothing, your chest sinking under the weight of those four words. You have to go, you’re going to go, you’ve been waiting all this time to go - but that doesn’t mean you want to, right at this moment.

No, at this moment, in your seat on his warm lap on your couch, with the pools of his expressive brown eyes looking up at you, with the taste of his mouth still lingering on your tongue and the weight of his cock still felt inside you from an hour ago, you don’t want to leave.

Flakes float past your window, the sky a deceivingly bright blue for how bitterly cold it is outside and slightly embarrassed at the tremble of tears approaching, you lean forward to kiss him before they fall.

Taken aback by the fierceness of your mouth and by the need in your grip on his shoulders, he sits up straighter, gathering you in his arms.

“Hey,” he murmurs softly against your lips. “Hey.”

He kisses you, trying to slow you down and you push him back into the cushions instead, forcing yourself on him. He doesn’t have it in him to refuse you this time. Not when you so clearly need him. Not when he understands this feeling: the feeling of getting everything you want at the wrong time.

Almost trembling in his hold, you’re frantic in your touches and your mouth tastes like desperation, your tongue sliding hungrily against his. He can feel your brain working, your hands clinging on for dear life in order to anchor yourself in this moment, as if you’re trying to memorize the feeling of your bodies moving together.

The urge to protect you rises in him; something that’s laid dormant there from the start. If you want to be taken out of your head and reminded of his presence right now, he’ll do it.

A change comes over his body, one you can feel. His hand slides hungrily up your spine, burying into the hair at the nape of your neck and for a moment he splays his hand to cradle the base of your skull before his hold abruptly tightens, fisting your hair. The pull on the strands burns your scalp and his eyes flash when he uses the hold to tug you back.

“What do you want, Birdie?” His eyes fall down the stretched line of your throat, stopping at your heaving chest under the thin material of your tank top. He reaches up, palming the weight of your breast through the fabric. Just like his hold on your hair, it starts out soft, and then gets harder. He watches your face while he circles your nipple with his thumb until it beads under his touch and the ghost of a smile curls at the edge of his mouth.

Pulling on your hair in a silent reminder of who is in charge, his other hand reaches for your wrist, guiding your hand between his legs. He flattens your hold over the curve of his bulge, his cock twitching with interest as the tension between you builds and he pushes your fingers to mold around him.

“You want it in your mouth?”

You say nothing, and he flexes his hand over yours, making you rub him as he hardens.

“A mouth like yours was made to take me, did you know that?”

His hold on your hair pulls you closer, and he lets go of your hand. You loosen your grip on his cock, and he tilts his head in reprimand, pushing it back into place. Understanding his silent rebuke, you go back to stroking him and he lifts his hand to touch your mouth, tracing the shape of it. Two of his fingers come to rest on your bottom lip, and you instinctively open up, letting him push them inside. He strokes the wet muscle of your tongue, watching you wrap your lips around the digits and suck. Between his grip on your hair and his fingers in your mouth, you’re trapped.

“You were made to take a cock like this here,” pushing his fingers deeper. He tests you, saliva flooding your mouth the further back he gets and his cock fully hardens in your hand as he watches your throat work with a swallow.

“You’re so good at swallowing. Do you want it all, Birdie?” His fingers pull back, giving you room to breathe for a moment before he pushes them back in.

“You gonna be a good girl for me and — fuck,” he whispers in a groan, watching your lips circle the base of his fingers, feeling your throat open up. “If I give it to you, you gonna fit it all in there?”

You nod, as much as you can with his hold still tight and when he slowly slides his fingers out, you feel how wet they are. A string of drool drips down over your lip, sliding down your chin and before you can register, he quickly leans forward, a flick of his tongue lapping it up.

“Where else were you made to take it all? Hmm?” His slick soaked digits drag down the plane of your chest, catching on the neckline of your top as he pulls it down and he keeps going; your breathing picking up pace. His eyes are burning into you, watching your reaction and when you feel his knuckles brush against the damp crotch of your panties, you whimper.

“Here?” His hand flips, stroking you. “I know you can take the whole thing here, even though it’s a lot.”

His voice slides into a mock sympathy, and the tone of it shouldn’t make you as wet as it does, but a fresh wave of arousal flares under your skin. “It’s a lot, isn’t it?”

He waits for your nod and when you do it, he grins in wicked victory; the sight of it sinful. His eyes shift into a darker shade and he guides you closer, his mouth brushing against the length of your neck.

“You know what I think?” he whispers, ”I think you like it when it hurts. I think,” his tongue licking a line over your skin, “you like it when you’re stretched full. I think you’re partial to it, Birdie.”

Your hips shifting forward to force his hand to rub against your center, he gives in for a moment. Relief floods through your body, slick soaking the thin fabric and he rubs at the damp spot for a moment, running his tongue over his lower lip at your increasingly needy, yet distracted hold on his now fully hard cock.

His voice drops lower. “What about here, Birdie?” he asks, leaving the hollow of your entrance to push further back. His fingers follow the curve of your ass, until they rest featherlight between your cheeks.

Enough for you to feel the pressure of them.

Enough for the implication to make your face tighten with an aroused frown, your heart beating rapidly in your chest.

He’s a snake charmer, he’s a hypnotist, he’s a cat playing with a mouse, waiting to devour it. His fingers push against the ring of muscle, just a tiny bit. “Can you take it all here?”

You wait a beat, a moment of suspended time hanging heavy between the two of you when you swallow and then – you snap.

Lunging forward, he meets you halfway and your mouths meet with a crash, opening immediately for each other. His fist stays in your hair, holding you in place as he fucks your mouth with his tongue and before you can reach to pull his cock out, he twists and pushes you down into the couch.

His body falls heavy on top of yours, a weighted grind of his hips against your core when your thighs wrap high around his waist and everything is frantic; your breathing, your touches, your clothes being ripped off and tossed to the ground.

Making room for himself back between your thighs, he reaches down to line himself up and when you stop him, he frowns, looking up at you. He is half gone already, the heat of your cunt felt against the thick, rounded tip of his cock and he takes your hand and pushes it into the cushion above your head with a growl, kissing you.

He tries again, his cock catching against your entrance, so close to where you both want to be, but when you squirm underneath him, he stops.

“What? What’s –” he asks breathless, his tongue sliding along his bottom lip to catch your taste.

You flip underneath him, positioning yourself face down on the couch and you arch your back, fitting the curve of your ass against his hips.

“Like this,” you ask, bracing your hands on the edges of the cushion. “I want it like this, okay?”

He groans, pressing his cock tight against the crack of your ass.

Stuff of his fantasies, he wants to fuck you here so bad it hurts. He’s thought about it more than he would ever admit — this final act of claiming every part of you for himself.

It feels like a lot - the stiff weight of his cock resting there and he rolls his hips in a slow stroke, mimicking the act itself. His hands braced by your shoulders, his body draped over yours, you match his thrusts with a roll of your hips, meeting him. When he lifts himself off of you, you whimper in need.

His knee digs into the cushion next to yours, his hands tugging your hips higher in his hold and with his other foot on the floor for leverage, he lines up and shoves himself inside your cunt, pushing the air from your lungs.

“Fuck,” you cry out hoarsely, the word catching with how thick he feels sliding in so deep. His hand comes down with a crack before gripping your ass cheek so tight his knuckles turn white and he uses his hold to tug you back onto his cock, his hips pushing forward in a rapid slap against your skin.

The pace is brutal, fast, overwhelming, stroking against a spot inside you only he has ever been able to reach. You close your eyes and clench your jaw, letting out your muffled moans into the couch. He’s filling you so fucking tight in this position.

“Just like that,” you beg, your voice cracking. “Fuck – just like that. Just like that.”

Entering that blissfully empty higher plane, you know you sound desperate but you can’t seem to care. He feels so good, driving every worry you had clean out of your head with the command he has over you right now and you give yourself over to it, letting him use your body.

Don’t think about leaving. Don’t think about what this means.

A familiar tightening coils hot in your belly, the force of it pushing its way up, up, up, until the tingle of it makes your breasts tighten, your throat tense, and –

He pulls out, pulling you back from the edge.

“No,” you start to whine, and he scoots his knees forward, taking the stiff length of his cock in his hand and slapping the wet weight of it against your tight hole. His fingers replace his cock, two of them pushing snug inside your cunt with a practiced slip and you start to fuck yourself back onto his hand.

“Fucking look at you, Birdie,” he praises, a slip of awe in his low voice. “I’ll give you what you want. Just hang on and be a good girl for me, okay?”

His fingers fill you, pulling out before pushing back in. You’re so wet it’s audible; something he adds to when he slides his fingers out for a quick taste, sucking his fingers with a lewd sound before pushing them back inside your slick heat.

“Please fuck me,” you beg, your thighs tensing when he slips in a third. It’s unbearable, the way you can feel the stiff weight of his cock resting heavy against you like a promise just out of reach. Finally, he slides his fingers out and guides his cock back into place, something you almost thank him for until you’re distracted by another feeling - the pads of his slick fingers stroking the tight ring of your ass.

He doesn’t ask, but you don’t say no either and just like before, there is a beat – and then a slow push inside.

“Shhhh,” he soothes when your body tenses under his, your fingers curling around the edge of the cushion in a fierce grip when he slides his cock in all the way down to the base at the same time he eases a finger inside your ass. His knuckles are slick with you, smearing damp against your skin as he tests the depth of what you can take. “You can do it. You can take it.”

You nod, unable to form words anymore with how full you feel. He pulls them out in tandem, guiding them back in again at the same time and he does it again, again, until you’ve started to relax and your cunt pulls him deep with each clench.

“Can you take another one?” He’s the one begging now. “Oh fuck, can you take another one for me? Tell me. Tell me you can.”

“Yes,” you cry out, a sob catching in your throat when he adds a second to the first, easing them in. “Oh god, that’s – it’s a lot, Ezra. It’s a lot.”

He keeps his fingers buried, letting you adjust around them, and keeps fucking you, groaning at how wet you’re getting.

“I know honey, I know. But you look so fucking good like this,” he chants, slowly picking up his pace again. “You’re so fucking good for me. So good. You’re gonna make me come. You’re gonna make me fill this pretty pussy up until it’s leaking, and then next time –” his head tips back with a strained groan, heat building at the base of his spine, “next time I’m gonna fill your ass, okay? I wanna fuck it until I come inside it. I’ll make it feel so good.”

Please, please you chant, almost inaudible with how heavily you’re breathing and when he feels you start to come, he holds his own release back until you do. He’s never heard moans like this from you before; pleasure soaked on the verge of pleading, your cunt squeezing him so tight it almost hurts.

His fingers stay in place, buried down to the knuckle, and his cock is buried just the same, eventually making you take it all when he spills deep inside you.

You are limp, boneless, sated in a way you’ve never been before and he eases everything out, stretching to lay down next to you on the couch. Making room for him, you rest your cheek on his chest, his heart thundering underneath it.

It’s quiet again.

The solidness of his body. His scent. The timbre of his voice. The depth of his dimple. His smile. His laugh. The way you fit just right when you lay with him like this.

You don’t know it, but he’s cataloging the same for you.

The buzzer rings loud, startling you both from your thoughts as the moment breaks and you move to sit up, laughing at how very naked you both are.

“Thank god,” he groans, throwing his arm over his eyes. He smiles, the lower half of his whiskered face stretching with it. He’s so tired and worn out, he can’t even move. “I’m starving.”

–

Carefully holding the apple on the cutting board, you quarter it and then slice those chunks, setting aside crisp wedges. Cee studying at your place today, your writing has devolved into chatting about your professors and you can hear her talking through the crack in the bathroom door as she washes her hands.

The goat cheese out, a butter knife sits ready to smear some on each piece and as you cut off another slice, you arrange them on a plate.

“Care to explain this?” she says, exiting the bathroom with a grin. She drops an opened black condom wrapper on the counter right next to the cutting board and when you glance at it, your hand slips, the knife cutting your finger.

“Shit!” You drop the knife, walking over to the sink to rinse the cut out.

“Oh damn, hang on.” She leaves the room, going to find your box of bandaids and you can hear distant rummaging while you inspect the cut with a hiss. It’s not deep, thank god for that, but christ it stings. Your heart pounds in your chest, your eyes looking over at the wrapper.

“Here you go,” Cee says, walking over with the box and setting it down on the counter. She helps you dry the cut with a paper towel, unwrapping a bandage for your hand and when you’re winding it carefully around the digit, she leans her hip against the counter and watches.

“So you gonna tell me who's been coming over here?” She looks excited at the prospect of a secret, turning to glance at the wrapper before bringing her gaze back to you. “Giving you something good, by the looks of that wrapper. Aren’t the black ones, like, extra large or something?”

She reaches for it, picking it up and your stomach drops.

“Yea,” she reads, “Magnum.” Her eyebrows do a little wiggle. “Spill it.”

“I am not talking about this with you,” you reply without thinking and she looks momentarily hurt, falling silent. You try to back pedal. “I mean, it’s just — it’s kinda new? Or I’m….”

“Are you embarrassed or something?” Her face lights up in revelation, her eyes growing wide. “Oh my god, it’s totally someone you don’t want anyone to know you’re fucking. I bet he’s super embarrassing. Is it that guy from our study group? No wait — the one from our Thursday class?” Her eyes daze far away, her finger tapping on the wrapper. “I can’t believe he has a big dick. Now that’s all I’m gonna picture when I see him.”

“It’s not him,” you laugh, picking up the wrapper. You throw it in your kitchen garbage can, trying not to think about a very naked Ezra walking to the sink you’re standing by last week, to get a glass of post sex water. Your mouth goes dry, and you clear the thought from your head. “It’s someone else, but it was like, a one time thing. He’s not anyone you know.”

You try to keep your voice steady, hoping she doesn’t pick up on how fast you feel like you’re talking. If you dismiss it too easily, she won’t drop it. But if you try to come up with more details, you’re only burying yourself deeper in a lie. You try to keep it as minimal as possible, acting casual.

“It wasn’t that great,” you confide, wrinkling your nose. “I thought maybe it would be, when he pulled that out,” you gesture at the wrapper, “but it wasn’t. Won’t happen again.”

The lie seems like a betrayal to speak aloud, even more so given the way he does fuck.

“Damn. That’s too bad. I got excited there for a moment.”

She grabs the plate of apples while you take the cheese, and she leads you into the living room.

The first time he came over to your house, you couldn’t help but think about that spot on your couch being Cee’s spot. She always sits by the window, her body in the same lithe compacted curl of limbs and when he had sat there, it felt……strange.

Now, it's the reverse. The spot is still hers, but the room belongs to him. You’ve lain tangled on this couch, fucked him on this couch, watched him sleep on this couch - it’s just as much his as it is yours at this point, with how much looking at it makes you think of him.

He’s woven himself in the very fabric of it, and now she sits there, joining him.

“What about you?“ you ask, distracting her. “How’s it going with the guy from the party?”

She grins, holding a piece of apple aloft.

“Well, lemme tell ya.”

–

Ezra holds the worn, smeared cloth in his hand, bringing the brass hardware close to his face. He inspects it for a moment, turning it to look for imperfections and with a steady hand, starts to rub small circles into the hard surface, stripping away the dirt layer by layer.

Anything too abrasive, and he’ll wreck it. A touch too light, and it’ll do nothing. Years of practice come in handy, his motions almost second nature as he sits in his workroom by the window and the original surface comes forth slowly, glimmering gold peeking through the milky swirls of mixture. Usually, he appreciates this part of the process the most but today, it doesn’t even register with him.

Rumours by Fleetwood Mac plays on his stereo, the album on repeat since this morning. He heard Cee come home a while ago, the sound of the front door shutting underneath the music and an image of you dancing with him drifts into his mind, another of your thumb tapping along the side of his hand to the beat as you held it in his car.

He had introduced you to the album, delighting in your discovery of it over the last few weeks. He used to play it for Cee all the time, her tawny head swaying to the music while she did her homework and he made dinner, or her lips moving with the words in the backseat as he drove her to school. She used to like to sleep in one of his t-shirts for the band, always stealing the lightened with age black tee until she washed it so many times it began to fray around the neck. She gave it back long ago, and he wore it now - and so did you.

You, wearing it on your couch, bare underneath.

You, slipping it on before padding over to the kitchen to start some lunch.

You, sleeping in it as you dozed the afternoon away; the marks of his love peeking through a hole in the collar.

Maybe he should give it to you when you leave, as a parting gift. It’s one of his favorites, but it seems fitting to give it to you, since you are too.

His thumb rubs out the rest of the polish; his foot tapping to the beat.

Listen to the wind blow, watch the sun rise

Running in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies

“Hey,” Cee enters the room, peeking her head through the doorway and Ezra moves to turn the music down. “You wanna order dinner in? It’s brutal out there.”

“Yea,” he replies, setting the piece he was working on down next to the others in the row. He grabs another one, narrowing his eyes in search. “You can pick. Whatever you want.”

“My phone died on the way home, I’m gonna use yours, okay?”

She doesn’t wait for his answer, padding into the kitchen to grab it off the table where she saw it. She sinks down into the couch, one thumb typing in his passcode while the other hand rubs her cold toes and she makes a mental note to grab a new pair of socks after ordering food. Actually, maybe a hot shower to warm up.

Flipping through his home screen icons, she searches for the food delivery app.

Her eyes stop on a yellow icon. Snapchat? When did he download that?

She swipes the screen again, his photo roll accidentally popping up and she nearly closes it before she spots something familiar. Tapping it with her thumb, a small frown appears delicately on her face. She brings the screen closer.

A selfie, of you and Ezra, outside somewhere. She tries to remember when you would have taken this, her mind running through all the places you’ve gone together in the last couple weeks but when she comes up short, she glances at the date.

February 21

Hang on - wasn’t that the weekend of her retreat?

Maybe the two of you went out to lunch or something, or ran into each other while running errands? She makes automatic allowances in her brain, knowing full well that while you live close, but you don’t live that close - not close enough to frequent the same places for errands. Biting her lip and peering down the hallway towards his work room, she swipes the screen again.

You, smiling, clearly at dinner. Same date.

She swipes again.

You, tucked into the crook of his arm, and she recognizes their couch behind you.

She swipes again, and this time, her eyes narrow.

“What the fuck.”

You, clearly in Ezra’s bed. Your nude body languidly stretched out, your ass on display as you rest your cheek in the cradle of your arms and smile at him. The date at the top states the next day - you clearly spent the weekend together.

A hot wave of nausea rolls through her, an undercurrent of hurt rippling below the surface and she fights the urge to keep swiping, setting his phone down on the couch. What she really wants to do is throw it, anger demanding the satisfaction of hearing the screen break, her body filled with the urge to destroy something - but she holds it all tightly in, her face eerily calm.

Getting off the couch, she grabs her coat and boots, snatching her keys from the hook.

Ezra yells out her name when he hears the front door slam, but she doesn’t hear it, already running down their front steps.

It’s piercingly cold again today, the wind biting into her exposed face as she makes her way to the train station, but she can barely feel it. Not with how hard she’s mentally working to think of everything she’s missed.

To anyone really looking, they would see the glimmer of moisture in her eyes, or the screwed twist of her features as she tries to think about what she is going to say to you. No one is looking though. No one ever really is, not in this city and certainly not on a day like today when everyone has their heads down as they try to brace against the wind. She makes it onto the train before the first tear falls, but she doesn’t let any follow it. Her thumb smears it away, and she reaches into her bag for her headphones, shutting the world out.

How long? How long have you been seeing him? Been fucking him? She thinks about your schedule and his, all the times you’ve been over to their house. Did you do it there when she was gone? When she wasn’t? Her eyes close when she thinks about the condom wrapper she found in your trash and disgust pulls at her face, embarrassment coursing through her.

She’s such a fucking idiot.

Suddenly all those times you asked about him sound different, the subtext popping out clear as day. Seeing as how that started after the first time she brought you home, memories of every time after flip rapidly through her mind.

Was it always just to see him?

Another tear threatens to escape, but she pushes it down. She is determined not to be another person crying on the subway; one of countless in a day, or in a week, or this year. The pitch black of the tunnel beyond the window reflects her own face back at her, but she doesn’t see it. Her eyes glazed, her mind working; the conductor’s muffled, staticky voice breaking through to announce the next stop.

How long?

–

Fleetwood Mac’s The Chain plays in your living room, Stevie Nick’s voice carrying through into the kitchen. Your hips sway at the sink, your mouth moving with the words and when you rinse the plate you’re washing and put it in the rack, your foot taps with the steady beat of the drums.

Running in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies

Break the silence, damn the dark, damn the light

A memory of Ezra dancing in your kitchen last week to the song makes you smile, his hands reaching to pull you into his arms as he shuffled across your scuffed wood floors in just his black briefs and one of the five band t-shirts he owned. He looked so endearing, so happy and when he turned you to wrap his arms around your body while curling his own around your back, you laughed at his voice crooning in your ear.

He was so warm, crowding against you: your back a neat fit to his broad front, his hips tight against the give of your ass, his whiskered chin scraped delicately along the column of your neck when you leaned back into him and swayed with the music. You get lost deeper into the memory, picturing the way the sun from the kitchen window struck the white spot in his hair. Like a beacon, it called out for your touch, and when you threaded your fingers through the patch, he had nuzzled his face against your wrist and gave you a kiss there.

“Birdie, you taste good enough to eat.”

Your phone stops playing, ringing instead and you wipe your hands on a towel, picking it up. Before you can answer it, you spot two messages from Cee - but before you can read them, you see she’s the one calling.

“Hey,” you answer, “what’s up?”

“‘I’m out front. Can you let me in?”

“Sure,” you answer, pressing the buzzer. “Come on up.”

Hanging up the phone and pausing your music, you unlock the front door. In the kitchen when she walks in, you glance at her over your shoulder with a smile.

“Hey,” you greet her warmly.

“So I saw something today,” she begins, ignoring your hello and there is clear agitation in her movements, but you miss it, draining the sink.

“Oh yea?” you reply, turning to face her.

“Yea, I was looking at Ezra’s phone for a second, he asked me to order food or something, and I saw some pictures.”

You pause, holding her gaze and you wonder if it’s already too late to pretend like you don’t know what she’s talking about or if your face has already given you away.

“They were of you.” She looks down at the floor for a second before she brings her eyes back up to yours. “You were naked.”

You see a flash of hurt cross her features, a slip of vulnerability before the impenetrable wall comes down and closes her off. It’s the same look she had on her face the first time you met her on the subway, the same one she wears while navigating the city and while you’ve always admired it, it hurts to be the recipient on the other side of that blank stare. You’re supposed to be next to her, not pushed away. But what did you expect?

Your mouth dries, and you don’t know what to say. So you say nothing; your gut churning.

Her jaw clenches at your silence, her eyes turning to steel.

“So you fuck people’s dads now? That your thing?”

“Cee,” you hold your hands out, taking a step closer, “it’s not like that. I just – I don’t know. It just happened one night, but –”

You start to say that it’s become something more than that, but it doesn’t feel right voicing something to her that you’ve never even told him. Those words are meant for him first - which is part of the problem. The idea that you have words just meant for him now, and not her.

“When? When did it happen?”

You waver for a moment between a lie that would make her feel better, and the truth. Deciding that you’ve lied enough, you answer. “A couple months ago. I don’t know exactly when, but it’s been…..awhile. It’s been going on for a while.”

“That condom wrapper in the trash the other day?”

This question, you don’t answer and her face visibly pales. “That’s so fucking gross. I can’t believe you let me touch that.”

“I’m sorry! What was I supposed to do? Rip it out of your hand? Tell you –”

“How about not fuck him? Like everyone else? Why couldn’t you just do that?”

The remark is so cutting, so abrupt, you feel immediately chastened.

“I told you everyone throws themselves at him. I told you how I felt about it. I can’t believe I was so dumb and brought you around and let you spend the night and ignored all the times you asked about him and where he was – did you even want to be at my house because of me? Or was it just him?”

“Cee, no. No. You know that’s not true. I met you first, I liked you first, I wanted to – I still want to be your friend. He just came……..later.” You look away, ashamed, your hand shaking as it grips the kitchen counter.

On the verge of tears, you meet her eye, and when she sees your expression her face softens into sympathy just for a second, before disgust takes over again. Her arms cross tight around her body, and she studies you as if steeling herself against your pain and against her own.

“This is really fucked up, you know?” A tear slips from the corner of her eye and she angrily wipes it away. “I gotta go. I gotta — I gotta think about this.”

You nod, swallowing thickly. “I’m really sorry, Cee. I really am.”

She looks at you for a moment, her shrewd eyes assessing your face. Saying nothing, she pushes off the table and walks out the door.

The second she does, you reach for your phone. Hands shaking, you call Ezra.

“Hello, Birdie. I was just thinking about you.”

The smile in his greeting makes you close your eyes, the sound of his voice comforting.

“Hey.” Your voice is tight with the adrenaline pulsing through your body, your stomach twisting with it. “Cee found out and she’s — oh god, she’s really upset.” Your voice cracks into the beginnings of a sob, but you reign it in with a deep breath.

“Wait,” he begins, sounding a lot more serious than when he answered. “How? Wait. Are you okay? Where are you?”

“I’m at home.” You let out another heavy breath, sitting down on your kitchen chair. “She said she found some pictures of me on your phone? She was just here, but she left already. I’m not sure if she’s coming home, or –”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll find her and talk to her. Are you okay? Do you want me to come over?”

You don’t answer right away; his stomach sinking on the other end of the line.

“I don’t think that would be such a good idea right now. Not when she’s this upset.” You bite your lip, wiping away a tear tracking down the curve of your cheek. “Don’t you think?”

He lets out a sign on his end. “Yea, you’re probably right.” His tone shifts into something more earnest, more fierce. “But I will if you want me to. I want to.”

Your eyes close, and you put your head down on the table into the cradle of your arm. He keeps talking, your hand pressing the phone closer to your ear.

“I’ll fix it, Birdie. I’ll talk to her, okay? This is my fault, and she’s mad at me, not you. Are you listening?”

“Yea,” you reply softly.

“Are you okay?”

You sniffle, your voice shaking in your whisper. “She’s so mad, Ez. And it’s like, she’s not even angry, she’s just so…..hurt. She looked so disappointed. Like she didn’t even wanna know me anymore.”

“Hey,” he soothes, “hey. She does. She’ll come around. I’ll talk to her. I’ll figure it out and then I’ll give you a call, okay?”

You nod, wishing he was here to pull you into his lap, or wrap his arms around you, or murmur these words directly into your ear without the barrier of the phone between you. A fresh wave of tears fall, wetting the sleeve of your shirt. There was once a point in which you would turn to her for that comfort, being the first person you’d call when you wanted reassurance, but that’s changed now. You don’t even know when it did, but it did and the idea that you might lose both of them overwhelms you, crushing your chest.

“Are you there, sweetheart?”

The endearment makes it hurt worse, and you take a steadying breath in, answering him.

“Yea. I’m here. I’ll be here.”

He says goodbye and so do you; your hand placing the phone face down on the table before you hide your face in the crook of your arms and cry.

–

Cee’s phone buzzes with another phone call, and without even looking, she silences it. Her hand holding onto it inside of her coat pocket, she turns up the volume on her headphones and resumes staring out the window.

Leaving your house, she didn’t even know where she was going. Eventually she found herself walking up the freshly shoveled steps of the public library, wiping her boots on the mat before heading to her favorite table.

A four top, hidden in the East Wing and aged with the touch of countless hands and books, she’s spent hours here. The endless shelves of books surrounding her have been her refuge for years: they’ve seen her head bent over algebra homework in high school, silently observed her smile as she texted her friends in college, faded into the background as she shut the world out with her music and wrote. The spot set just by the window, it has an unobstructed view of Bryant Park just outside the old wooden frame and she lets her head rest there, against the cold glass.

Her phone buzzes again, the call going unanswered.

She watches people walk through the park paths, their figures standing out against the snow. The field is covered in snow now, but she can see the spot where the two of you sat one afternoon; hard boiled egg and cucumber sandwiches from a stand nearby, the paperback you were each reading face down with a bent spine on the blanket she had packed. You had spent hours under the shade of the green trees that afternoon, eventually moving inside to the very table she was sitting at when it was time to really get to work.

She looks at the chair across from her, thinking. She had asked you over for dinner that day, and she can still see the way you bit your lip and looked away from her. It was now apparent that you were trying to act casual.

“Will Ezra be there?”

At the time, she had thought that you were asking in hopes that you’d be alone, the dynamic always changing when you introduce a third person to a set of two. But now she knows the truth. You were hoping he would be there. You used to ask that question so much, peppering your curiosity about him into the conversation and she closes her eyes, focusing on her music.

She’s an idiot.

Of course you liked him. Everyone does. Instant friends with anyone he meets, outgoing and charming and handsome, she should have seen it from a mile away. She wonders how serious he is about you, never having seen him actually date anyone for long. She can’t decide which would be worse: him using you, or him wanting something more.

Her phone buzzes again, and waits a moment before pulling it out of her pocket, looking down at the screen.

Ezra: where are you

Ezra: answer the phone, Cee

He doesn’t text. When did he start texting? Was it when he downloaded Snapchat? Obviously to communicate with you in secret, so she wouldn’t hear any conversation with you. The premeditated secrecy of it all digs deep, and she ignores his messages, putting her phone back in her pocket.

The shadow of dusk starts to slip between the high rise buildings, the number of people in the park fading from a crowd to singles here and there, making their way home. Vendors start to close their stands; her reflection in the window becoming more pronounced against the darkness outside; the intercom system in the library crackling out an announcement to close.

Still, she sits, her forehead against the glass.

–

Ezra’s pacing in the living room stops the second he hears the key turn in the lock, and he stands still, watching Cee come inside. For a moment, she looks so small: her cheeks and nose pink with cold, her hat pulled low over her head, the headphones she’s never seen without over the top of it. She slips them down around her neck, toeing off her wet boots.

“Where the hell have you been? I’ve been calling you.”

“Out. Obviously.”

Ezra fights the urge to roll his eyes, and he slips his hands in his pockets, staring at her.

“Why didn’t you answer your phone?”

“I didn’t want to talk to you.”

He keeps his eyes on her, his jaw shifting. “I know you don’t, but we need to talk about it.”

His parental tone irritates her, and she brushes past him, walking into the kitchen.

“Don’t bother. Didn’t seem that important when you started this whole thing, so I don’t know why you wanna do it now.”

“Cee –”, he begins, and she cuts him off.

“Don’t feed me some kinda bullshit, okay? Do whatever you want. I don’t care.”

“Well, that’s not true. Seems like you care a lot. Care enough to go over there and –”

Cee huffs in disgusted amusement, crossing her arms.

“Already talked to her about it, huh?”

“Of course I have.”

“How many times have you guys had secret talks behind my back? Have you talked about me?”

“What?” he asks, confused. “Why would we do that? Of course not.” He shakes his head, looking down at the floor. “This is between me and her. It’s something that just….happened.”

“You fucked her.” Her blunt words make his head snap up, his eyes narrowing. “You’ve been fucking her. You’re telling me that “just happened?” And it’s been “just happening” for months?”

Her face is cold, a mask of indifference disguising her hurt and he’s momentarily thrown back into her years as a teenager.

“I did. You’re right. But I’m also an adult and so is she. She wanted –”

“Shut up.” She rolls her eyes, trying to back out of the conversation, but he keeps going.

“Cee, it was between her and me. It had nothing to do with you. Has nothing to do with you–”

She looks away, her eyes fixed on a point in the corner of the kitchen and it’s like she’s thinking; her jaw shifting for a moment. When she stares back at him, it’s with a look of decision.

“You can’t keep seeing her.”

“I can.” His gaze pins her in place. “And I will.”

“Of all the people, all the women who throw themselves at you, of all the friends you have and the people you know, of all the people in this fucking city, you had to pick her. The one person who was mine.”

“What do you mean, was?” he frowns, exasperated. “You aren’t going to be her friend anymore?”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” she yells. “How can I be her friend? How can I invite her over here anymore, knowing that you probably had sex on that couch and are gonna do it when I’m asleep or something? Knowing that she just wants to see you and not me? I don’t want to be a third wheel in my own goddamn house. And how can I trust her anymore?” She shakes her head, confident in her decision. “She lied. She hid this and so did you. She’s a liar and a fucking –”

“Hey.” His voice deepens into an authoritative clip, his face stern. “Don’t talk about her that way. She doesn’t deserve it. She lied to protect your feelings. This fight here is between you and me, and you know it.”

“You should have just fucking told me.”

Her anger at being treated like a child flares bright, and for a moment, he sees his mistake. Still, she’s acting more like a child than an adult right now.

“Yea, I can see you would have taken it real well.”

“Fuck you, Ezra. Of all the fucking people,” she shakes her head, as if trying to shake out the thought of the two of you. “It’s fucking pathetic, sleeping with someone half your age. Do you even care about her, or were you just gonna fuck around until she leaves? Does she know you never stay with anyone for long?”

“Because of you!” his voice rises. “Look at how you’re fucking acting right now! I’ve been taking care of you since you were little and I’ve always put you first. Always!” He turns, running his hand through his hair. “The one fucking time I think of myself first, this is how you act? Yea, I fucked her. I’ve been going over to her house when you’re at school and we’ve been hanging out every week and I talk to her on the phone in my room at night and last weekend when you went out of town, we spent the weekend together and –”

Cee puts her hands over her ears, stomping from the room, but he grabs her elbow, dragging her back.

“And when she said she was leaving,” he speaks louder, holding onto her, “I was fucking sad, because I don’t want her to go, okay?”

Cee stills, her hands dropping.

“What?”

“I don’t want her to go.” He didn’t even tell you that, and it feels wrong to say it to Cee now. Those words are meant for you — but he can’t. You’d feel like you should stay, and that’s not right.

“Well, she’s going,” she says flatly, almost defiant in her tone.

“I know she is. She should.”

“Yea, she should.” Cee’s words are harder than his, laced with resigned anger and he looks disappointed at her, letting her go.

The tension that had been rising in the small room dissipates, and they both slump at the loss of it, defeated.

Cee walks out of the room, slamming her bedroom door behind her. Ezra flinches at the sound, leaving the kitchen to go to his work room. Fleetwood Mac is still playing softly in the corner, your face floating into his mind and at the memory of your broken voice on the phone earlier, he picks up a piece of hardware and whips it at the wall.

Sinking down into a chair covered in a drop cloth, he puts his head in his hands.

#ezra prospect #ezra x reader #ezra x you #ezra/you #ezra/reader #ezra smut #pedro pascal

440 notes · View notes