#and everyone expected him to continue throughout high school and college

[chvoswxtch]

hello! I hope ur having a good day! I have a request if you’re up to it! we’ve always had Professor matt so to spice things up can we have a college!matt x professor!reader? he’s actively trying to gain the pretty professor’s attention and she’s slowly falling for it. you can make it fluffy or spicy or smutty. its all up to you!

hi nonnie!

I hope you're having a good day as well! I genuinely loved this idea bc we all know matty is a flirt but I feel like college!matty is a HUGE flirt and would totally go after the pretty professor. and honestly, she would eat that shit up, let's be real. but who wouldn't???

thank you so much for the request! ❤️

warning: contains mentions of sexual content (minors please dni), swearing word count: 3k

office hours.

When Matt was reminded by his advisor that he needed to take a literature course to satisfy his degree plan, his eyes nearly rolled into the back of his head. He had been continuously putting it off, but with one final semester left of undergrad, he couldn’t graduate without it. It wasn’t that Matt didn’t enjoy reading, he simply just wasn’t interested in taking anything that didn’t have to do with his program. He’d read enough “classic literature” and written enough analysis essays in high school, and he wasn’t looking forward to going through that agonizing process again. Reluctantly, he signed up for the last course available.

Taking a seat in the very back of the small classroom, Matt set up his laptop and plugged an earbud into his ear, prepared to appear engaged while he got started on a project for another class. All around him seats filled up with other students, but it wasn’t until he caught the sweet scent of pink grapefruit and blue wisteria that his fingers stilled over his keyboard. He turned his head slightly to the side towards the wall as the scent rushed down the hall, accompanied by a racing heartbeat. Matt’s head snapped towards the front when you walked through the classroom door slightly out of breath, heat in your cheeks from the run, and also a twinge of embarrassment. 

“Probably not the best first impression to be late on the first day of class, but in my defense, I’m still learning how to navigate New York. I can’t promise I won’t be late again, so we won’t be counting tardies in this class, to a reasonable limit.”

An anxious giggle left your lips, and luckily everyone seemed to find the humor in your admission. Matt’s lips parted slightly at the sound, and he quickly ripped the earbud out of his ear as you introduced yourself.

“Hi everyone. My name is Y/N Y/L/N, please call me Y/N. This is my first year teaching, and you guys are my second class, so we’re figuring this all out together.”

Another timid giggle left your lips, and Matt clenched his fist tightly as the sound settled in his ears. 

“I don’t expect perfection, I just want you guys to do your best. We aren’t reading things some arrogant ‘expert’ decided was a classic, or writing mind numbing papers identifying every literary device to prove you know what they are. I want to show you works that move you and make you think…make you feel. And I want to know what they make you think, and how they make you feel. The only way to fail this class is to not try.”

God your voice. It was as sweet as your perfume and had a velvet cadence that stuck to Matt’s ears like honey. He wanted to listen to you talk for hours, about anything. Your heart continued to beat wildly in your chest throughout the duration of class, and you fiddled with the rings on your fingers as you paced slowly around. You were incredibly nervous. Matt could feel it in the tremble of your fingers, hear it in the slight shake of your voice, and feel it in the rush of blood that never left your cheeks. He found it endearing that you were so anxious, and could hear how passionate you were in the way you spoke. Everything about you drew him in, and before he could stop himself, he was marching up to your desk once everyone filed out of the room to introduce himself.

“Excuse me? Hi, my name is-”

“Matthew Murdock, right?”

Matt abruptly paused, and he swallowed the sound that threatened to come out of his mouth at the way you said his name.

“J-just Matt, uh…yeah.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Matt. I’m Y/N.”

Your hand was so soft and small clasped in his own, and he could faintly smell the scent of blackberry from a lotion you’d smoothed over your body the previous evening. 

“It’s nice to meet you as well.”

“You have perfect timing, I was actually just about to come to you.”

Matt’s ears perked up at that, and he stood up a little straighter, already missing your touch as you slowly let go of his hand.

“You were?”

“Yeah, this is for you.”

You lightly wrapped your fingers around his wrist, carefully guiding his hand to a folder that you had outstretched in your hand. Matt cocked his head to the side slightly as he let his fingers glide over the folder, pausing as they ran over a braille label that had his name on it. Taking the folder into his hands, he opened it to find stacks of paper in braille on the inside.

“It’s the syllabus, a list of the works we’re studying, and the first section of notes we’re going to go over. I wasn’t sure if you were able to access the digital copies. I’m still trying to figure out how the portal works, honestly.”

There was a timid smile that stretched across your mouth, and Matt could hear a slight bit of nerves in your confession. For a moment he was stunned silent by the kind gesture, swallowing thickly as he closed the folder and offered you a small smile in return.

“I-uh…yeah, I was able to. But um…I-thank you. For this, I uh…I appreciate it.”

“Of course. I like to have tangible copies of things, myself. Helps keep me organized. Or, at least I think it does. Maybe it’s a sensory thing and I’m just tricking myself into thinking it’s making me more productive.”

Matt couldn’t help but chuckle as you giggled softly, nodding his head in agreement.

“I can understand that.”

“Well if there’s ever anything you need, any help or accommodations at all, please don’t hesitate to tell me. All my information is on the syllabus, and I practically live here since I never go home, so my office is always open.”

“Good to know.”

From that day forward, Matt sat in the front row for every single class. He blitzed through every single text on the syllabus, always prepared to participate in the discussions, and approached every assignment early. He wanted so badly to impress you, and his chest swelled with pride every time you complimented one of his thoughts or ideas, or stayed behind after class to offer your positive verbal feedback on one of his assignments. 

Matt knew he wasn’t the only one that wanted the pretty, young professor’s attention. He could hear the way the other students in class talked about you, which caused a tide of possessiveness to rise in his chest. Matt could also feel your affect on them as you smiled in their direction, or offered a compliment to one of their remarks, and it made jealousy simmer in his bloodstream. He was determined to be your favorite.

He found himself constantly stopping by your office hours to feign needing help or a second opinion on his approach to a paper, mainly as an excuse to talk to you alone, but also to scratch that itch of praise when you confirmed he was on the right track. Matt knew he was smart, and he knew he wrote incredible papers, but he liked hearing that come from you. 

He loved when you complimented his intelligence. Was it wrong to fake being unsure just to hear you say, “That’s exactly right, Matt” or “I hadn’t even thought of it that way, but I love that idea”? Probably. But it didn’t feel wrong. It felt good.

Matt had to be careful playing dumb. You both knew he was smart, so he had to switch his tactics up. He found himself asking for other recommendations for reading material from you, wanting to know what your favorite works were, going out to buy them and consume them just to get a glimpse into your head, and then listen to the passion in your voice as you explained why they meant so much to you. He liked that you asked him questions too, questions he didn’t hear you ask any of the others when they stopped by. You asked him about how his other classes were going, how his day had been, about himself and his friends, and he could tell you genuinely cared about the answers. Every second he spent with you, he felt the crush he had on you getting stronger and stronger. He knew the way he felt about you was wrong. You were his professor, and he shouldn’t be having the thoughts about you that he did.

He shouldn’t feel like his heart was going to beat out of his chest every time you smiled in his direction and showered his mind in praise. He shouldn’t feel the spark of something more when you let him hold your arm as you guided him towards your office, reveling in the feeling of your soft skin beneath his fingertips. He shouldn’t stroke his cock to the sound of your voice from a recorded lecture, waiting to let himself come until it got to the part of the recording where you said his name so sweetly. He shouldn’t be waking up with a wet patch on his sweats after yet another wet dream about fucking you over your desk. All of this was wrong, and the good Catholic boy in him knew that.

But he couldn’t find it in himself to care. 

Because every time he started to feel guilty about what he was doing, he reminded himself of the way your body reacted to him.

Matt was careful with his flirting, crafting his sentences in a way that could be played off as casual conversation or banter, but riddled with undertones that could only be understood by the person given the cipher. The blood that rushed into your cheeks when Matt complimented you back or said something teasing that made you giggle only fueled his confidence to get bolder and bolder as the weeks went by. 

He heard the uptick in your heart rate when he mentioned how soothing he found your voice, and the way it pounded beneath your ribs when he “accidentally” brushed his hand over your exposed thigh to reach for his backpack. He felt the warmth that pooled in your cheeks when he stopped by with your favorite coffee, and when he confessed that you were one of the best professor’s he’d ever had; definitely “his favorite”, he had said. He should’ve felt bad that he could possibly ruin a career that you were clearly very passionate about, but the selfish part of his brain was screaming that you felt it too. 

With spring break approaching soon, and the thought of going a whole week without being around you, Matt devised a plan to finally make you his.

The building was empty considering most professors and students had left the previous day to get a head start on vacation plans, but Matt smiled to himself hearing your familiar heartbeat coming from your office. You had made class today optional, in case anyone was traveling or needed the break, and Matt had hoped that he would’ve been the only one to show up. To his disappointment, about half the class was there, but he knew he would get you alone soon enough. Matt waited until your office hours were just about to end, in case any other student had some last minute question, and when he was certain that it was just the two of you alone, he raised his knuckles to knock softly on the worn wood of your open door.

A quiet gasp left your lips, clearly surprised by the company, and Matt had to stop the cocky smirk that threatened to take over his mouth at the way your heart started to beat faster noticing his presence.

“Matt, hey.”

“Hey. I didn’t miss your office hours, did I?”

“Uh…nope. You have exactly a minute.”

Matt’s mouth split into a wide toothy grin at the playful tone in your voice, chuckling as he followed the familiar path from the door to the chair that was directly in front of your desk.

“Well, I’ll make this quick then. I know you have very important spring break plans to get to.”

“Oh yeah. Super important. I mean, my takeout isn’t gonna order itself.”

Matt dropped his backpack on the right side of the chair, folding up his cane as he sank back into the plush cushion and tossed it down by his feet. He pulled off his glasses and set them on your desk, a habit he had gotten into since you’d let it slip that you preferred it when he didn’t wear them.

I feel like you hide behind those, sometimes. It’s nice to get to see all of you, Matt.

His tongue darted out to quickly wet his lips as he fixed his gaze in your direction, a timid smile pulling at the corner of his mouth.

“I actually need to ask a favor of you.”

“Of course, Matt. Whatever you need. What can I do?”

Matt gripped onto his own thigh to steady himself, your immediate response and sweet voice hitting his cock before they even reached his ears. His lips parted slightly when you sat up a little straighter in your chair, leaning in closer over your desk with a warm smile on your lips.

“I need a letter of recommendation for the law program.”

“And you’re asking me?”

Matt couldn’t help but laugh at the surprised tone of your voice, shaking his head slowly as he leaned in closer to your desk and rested his elbows on the surface.

“I already have a few from my other professors, but my advisor mentioned having one from a professor outside of my main area of study would make me seem more…well rounded.”

Matt should’ve felt horrible about lying. He didn’t actually need a letter of recommendation from you. He’d applied to the law program months ago, and had already gotten in, but he would confess that later.

“Mm, so I’m next in line to make you look good?”

“Well, you are my favorite, and you have a way of making everything sound beautiful. If I’d taken your class a long time ago like I was supposed to, I probably would’ve asked you first before anyone else.”

Matt didn’t miss the sharp intake of breath you took, or the way your face instantly became a few degrees warmer.

“You wouldn’t have been able to take my class earlier, Matt. This is my first year, remember? You would’ve been stuck with someone else.”

“I guess I forget sometimes because you’re so good at this. But, that’s true. I don’t think I would’ve liked who I got stuck with as much as I like you. I’m glad I waited for you.”

Matt did his best to stay calm as he heard you swallow thickly, your breathing becoming a little more shallow as your heart rate drummed loudly in his ears.

“That’s…really nice of you to say, Matt-”

“I mean it.”

A blanket of tension suddenly surrounded the two of you, and his lips parted slightly as he caught a faint shudder course through you. Your fingers clutched the hem of your dress where it settled high on your thighs, digging your nails lightly into your palms through the fabric. Matt was waiting for your body to give him a signal, indisputable proof that you wanted him just as much as he wanted you, before he crossed that line the two of you had been dancing around.

“Um…when do you need it by?”

“The earlier the better, I’m a little behind. But, take your time. I’d like this to be as…real and honest as possible.”

“I…um…I can have it ready for you by the time we come back from spring break.”

“That’s perfect, thank you. I really appreciate you doing this for me. I appreciate everything that you do for me, truly.”

“O-of course. It’s my job, Matt.”

Matt’s voice dropped an octave lower as he cocked his head to the side slightly, running his tongue along his bottom lip before the corner of his mouth curled upwards into a devilish smirk. 

“No. I think it’s more than that.”

Bingo.

The second he felt you press your thighs together under the desk and the enticing scent of your arousal hit his nose, Matt knew he had you. He rose from the chair steadily, gliding around the side of your desk slowly like a predator circling in on its prey, grabbing onto the sides of your chair as he bent over so that your faces were merely an inch apart.

“I think you know that too, sweetheart.”

“Matt-”

“I think if I put my hand between these pretty thighs, you’d be just as wet for me as I am hard for you.”

A shocked gasp flew past your lips as you sank back further into your chair, fighting the urge to spread your thighs to let Matt test his own theory, and averting your gaze from the prominent bulge in his jeans. 

“We can’t-”

Matt lightly grasped your chin in his hand as he forced you to look at him. He delicately traced his thumb along your bottom lip, leaning in ever so slightly to bump his nose against yours as he inhaled your scent deeply.

“You’ve done so much for me. Been so good to me, sweetheart. Shown me so much kindness. I’d like to repay that kindness, and show you how much I appreciate you. You gonna let me do that?”

A soft whine of desperation sounded in your throat, and a huge grin split across Matt’s mouth as you leaned further into his touch. He had you exactly where he wanted you.

“Yes you are. Because you’re my girl. My good girl.”

tags: @yarrystyleeza @little-miss-dilf-lover @neverlandcity @charmedkim @queenofthenoobs @stilldreaming666 @messymissy @dark-academia-slut @strawberry1042

[highwayorgantrade]

Art History

Pairing: (cis)fem!reader x Carlisle Cullen

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: Cursing, the most mild nsfw (basically intense kissing and references to sex), minor choking, general tomfoolery.

Summary: A certain doctor helps you find resources for your college art history class.

Spotify Playlist: Art History

A/N: Aaah okay my first fic on this blog!! I'm so excited to get back into writing, especially with my favorite characters and people. Also, I'm sorry, I love Esmé as much as everyone else does, she does not exist here and Carlisle is the Ultimate Single Father™. And God, I did not expect it to be this long!!

The way that you met the Cullens was, at best, not ideal. A broken down car here, the offer of a ride there. It wasn't a bad thing - the friendship you had with the family had lasted all through high school up to a local community college.

When they told you the truth about who they were, what they were, you thought it was a joke.

"Yeah, very funny. Halloween isn't for another two months, and you can't all go as vampires, that would be so stupid." You snorted, returning to the homework that was scattered on the dining room table.

"(Y/N)... Think about it." Alice placed her hand on your shoulder, forcing you to listen.How are you just now noticing her hands are so cold? "Have you ever seen any of us eat? Go into the sun?"

You didn't want to think about it, you knew they would never lie to you like this. It's too insane to be a lie. But didn't they lie and pretend like they were human? It was just all too confusing, so naturally, it took you a few days before you starting going around their house again. They answered all your questions, even when you decided to punish them all a bit for not telling you sooner.

"So, have you ever thought about the ecological damage you might be doing with all the hunting?" You had been interrogating them for hours, but honestly? They were grateful. Grateful that you didn't run off and tell the entire town, or worse, flee from Forks and lose you forever.

"Honestly, we all have different preferences." Emmett replied cooly, as if you were chatting about movies. "I prefer some of the bigger stuff: Bears, wildcats. It's mostly deer, though."

"Never people." Carlisle confirms with a smile, and you almost immediately regret giving him a chance to speak. Before their confession, the pounding of your heart was a fun secret, a dream you knew would never come true. The scenarios have run through your head all the time, anytime you looked at him. And those rare moments where you felt brave enough to make eye contact? But now, you knew that it was basically a public confession. You never talked about it. The Cullens never did, either.

"I know one of you has to know something about the Reliquary of Sainte Foy." You sighed, dropping your bag at your feet.

"Please, (y/n), come in." Edward quipped from the living room.

"I mean, this whole thing makes no sense!" You continued, thinking back to every single time you've used Edward to complain. "First, she starts off the semester with the Renaissance, then goes to modern minimalism, then back to freakin' Jesus times?"

"You know," Alice strode in, reading over the same paper, "When I have questions about art history, I usually ask Carlisle." She leaned against the counter. "He's the oldest of us." The look her and Edward shared were lost to you, as you already began to think of excuses as to why you shouldn't be alone in a room with him. The fear of looking and sounding stupid overcame the desire to just do anything with him. The desire to mess up that stupidly perfect hair of his, or his cold hands roughly wrapping around your-.

No. Absolutely not.

"Ah, no! I wouldn't want to bother him. He's probably super busy, with all of his... doctoring stuff-"

"Nonsense." Edward smiled. "He would be overjoyed to help."

"Edward, seriously, don't-" You pleaded, but it was too late. Carlisle's name echoed throughout the house, but it felt like a death bell.

"I hope you find your answers!" Alice quickly took her exit out the front door, with Edward following right behind her, with a polite "Excuse me."

"(Y/N)!" He greeted you fondly, noticing Edward and Alice's backs as they walked deeper into the forest that surrounded the house. "Didn't Edward call for me?" He was watching them, but you were watching how he saw you and immediately smiled, and the way his arms flexed on the table.

Stop.

"Yeah, he did. They insisted that you could help me with art history, but this is old, old crap, and like, yeah, you're old, but you're not that old, so it's not really..." He began to smile again. "Super important." You finished, suddenly very aware of how you were standing. And how your hand rested so close to his. And how hot your face suddenly got.

"Well, what is it you need my help with?" He took your assignment paper. "The Reliquary of Sainte Foy. Around what time was that?" He looked back at you.

"Uh, the- Jesus times. Like upper double digits for the year. Which, I mean, I don't know when you were born, but I don't think you're that old, I mean you're still fun and pretty cool." God, why couldn't you just stop talking!

"Come on." He turned his back, taking your picking up your bag and slinging it over his shoulder. "I think I have something in my office."

His office? He's taking you to his office? You've been inside of it before, but it wasn't just him and you, it was him and his kids. Just keep reminding yourself: You are his children's friend. You're friends with every single one of this man's children. You're probably not even on his radar! A (publicly) mid-30 year old local surgeon, and men that looked like him in this part of Washington was rare. And to be going after a college student? Pull it together.

The steely resolve quickly crumbled as he held the door open for you to walk past him, and if you had any doubts he could hear your heart before, they were absolutely gone. You could hear your pounding heart in your head. The office was gorgeous, a few lamps and some candles gave the dark office a warm glow, and you could see he had been actively working on... something?

"I'm so sorry, did I interrupt something?" You glanced at the papers on his desk.

"Oh, no, I was just going over some old files. You could never interrupt me."

Oh.

"Now." He began scanning a section of his large bookshelves. "I unfortunately was not born in 'Jesus times,' but I was born in 1640, and my father was an Anglican priest, so I might have something about early Christian relics." He finally pulled a large dark blue book from the shelf and handed it to you. "What about The Book of Sainte Foy? Written in 1010 A.D. and translated in 1995."

"Yes, please, that would be amazing." You replied quickly, eager to spend as little time in this room as possible.

"(Y/N), you seem stressed. If college is getting to be too much, you could always take a break." His eyebrows knit together and set the book on his desk. Your eyes followed his hand and you swallowed. This cannot be happening.

"Uh, no, it's not college! College is fine. It's just... other stuff." Your hands clasped together to try and ease some of your nerves.

"Well, (Y/N), if it's something more personal, you know you can always talk to me. I've enjoyed having you around and I hate to see you upset." You knew he was trying to ease information out of you, but his words just made it harder.

"Carlisle, I-" Oh god. No. Stop talking. His hand came to rest on your upper arm, his icy hand almost burning your hot skin. You've imagined this so many times "It's you!"

Wait. No! Keep talking! The look of slight shock and confusion on his face combined with the gentle grip he had on your arm had wiped your brain of whatever you were going to say. His hand relaxed and fell back to his side.

"Me? (Y/N), did I make you uncomfortable?" His voice was soft, but serious. Fix this, now!

"No! Well, sort of. But no! Just... listen." You rubbed the back of your neck, shifting your weight between your legs. He leaned back against his desk and looked at you.

This was going to be hard.

"It's just... You make me nervous because you know, you're like a genetically modified beauty of a human being. I mean, have you seen yourself? Actually seen yourself?"

Carlisle opened his mouth to respond but he couldn't get the words out before you continued.

"You are... gorgeous. And I know, Edward's complained to me about that whole 'Oh, our beauty just lures in innocent prey so we can destroy them,' thing, but you're just a... a genuinely beautiful person. You help people in need, you go to some extreme lengths to help people because why? Because you're a doctor and it's what you do, damn it! It's amazing. You're amazing." You took a breath, filling your lungs with all the words you've kept to yourself. "And I like your hands."

And you like his hands? That's what your confession is ending on? Okay, own it.

"You like my hands?" He questioned, biting back a smile. Of course that's what he focused on. "Tell me about my hands." He stood up off his desk and moved closer to you. You felt like the breath was being sucked out of your lungs as you tried to organize your thoughts.

"Well, they're..." His hand came up to your face, thumb grazing your cheekbone.

"Go on."

"I like the way they're..." In an effort to look anywhere else but his eyes, you glanced down to his chest. His face seemed to inch closer to yours as you searched for words you knew you wouldn't find. The hand on your face traveled to the back of your neck, and his other hand found the small of your back. Your hands rested on his biceps, your last attempt to try to cover up your attraction towards him.

"Tell me you want this." Carlisle whispered, pressing you closer to him, encouraged by your racing heart.

"I want this so bad." You admitted, and those were the words that broke the both of you. He pressed you against a bookshelf as his lips met yours, and the amount of passion coming from Carlisle was shocking. His thumb came around your neck to wrap around the front, and the simple weight of his hand caused you to moan in his mouth. He smiled into the kiss and your hands went to his hair, tugging as gently as you could.

"Jump." He whispered in between kisses. The faint taste of spearmint lingered, and you whined at the loss.

"What?" You pulled back and stared at him.

"Jump."

God, please let his vampire strength come in clutch. You wrapped your legs around his waist and his hands found the bottom of your thighs. He placed you on top of his desk, careful as to not disturb any documents or books, and pulled you in again. this time, there was something different. The kiss was more insistent, more demanding.

"More." He groaned, and slotted his head into the curve of your neck, biting gently, and kissing the same spots.

You had never seen Carlisle like this, never this... out of control.

"So, when is this paper due?" He asked, pulling you out of your thoughts. He walked back to the door of his office, laying his hand on the doorknob. You simply stared at him, still catching your breath. Did he seriously just ask that? Now? "Is it tonight?"

"No?"

"Good." He grinned at you, and turned the lock. "Because it's not getting done."

[florallylly]

now that i've caved i have so many opinions about steddie/steve harrington it's actually sad

but sorry everyone should be obsessed/in love with steve harrington. and this is kind of my rant or like general opinions (headcanons?) about him. this is all personal opinion and i would love to debate or have validation so PLEASE!

anyways...

i do wonder about steve harrington's actual "bully" characterization because in my opinion, he canonically displayed more mean girl behavior. the fight with jonathan could be explained as somewhat of an overreaction to him being rightfully mad about someone he doesn't know taking nonconsensual illicit photos of his girlfriend AND himself. also keep in mind it's 1983 and homophobia is like common and the aids epidemic was during this period of time.

i also think that there's much to be said about how it could make sense that steve completely fell from grace after breaking with tommy and carol, but he's still on the basketball team. he's still invited to parties. and i don't know if billy was actually ever considered "king" in the way people often characterize steve. i also just really want him to be popular for a reason. like networking is a skill, and not just anyone has the people skills necessary to climb to so high of a position that you're considered king of the school. also he pulled MULTIPLE girls during his reign. like there has to be merit to the idea that he's a charming individual with appealing qualities and a nice enough person to keep girls willing to date him. gossip is real and i don't know if people would continue dating him if he was as bad a boyfriend as some people think he is.

WHICH brings me to nancy wheeler who i think was simply a case of she was going through a difficult time and they process grief and trauma differently. there was no instance where steve was actually a bad boyfriend to her. in fact, all i saw was him defending her and treating her like a princess but perhaps that's just me... either way, it never would have worked out in the long run because of their respective dreams. which is OKAY and NORMAL and doesn't make steve a bad boyfriend

i do think that steve's fall from grace after high school makes sense because like. now he's working a minimum wage job despite having been mr. rich boy throughout high school. he's also only hanging out with middle schoolers and he didn't get into college. BUT he clearly bounces back in family video because he's dating again, so i don't think he would ever really be bullied or ostracized like some fics have him be. UGH i just headcanon steve harrington having charm despite being a bit bitchy and still being somewhat worshipped by the general populace because realistically it's hard to wipe expectations and previous perceptions of people.

i also... i want steve to have other friends. i love a good tommy&carol redemption arc because as much as robin is his platonic soulmate um. he deserves to be adored and loved by all no comment i just love him too much ...

i have much more but don't want this to get horribly long so . literally begging someone to talk to me

[bucky-barmes]

♥︎ Platonic Soul Mates ♥︎

[ gif from @topgundaily ]

bob floyd x gnc!reader

in which you finally meet bob's friends in Miramar

created off of this prompt from @givethispromptatry

never thought i would be one to read let alone write anything for bob floyd, but here we are and i adore him

word count: 1,599 words

contains: general fluffiness, seresin being a shithead (whats new), reader mildly threatening someone but all in good faith, just nice wholesome gentle fluff

As always, my blog is 18+ only, minors dni

[ all my work is my own and not to be reposted or translated anywhere else ]

To say you were nervous was an understatement. You and Robert Floyd went way back. Like way back. We’re talking all the way back to kindergarten. You knew the second you saw the bigger kids picking on him in the playground that you would be there to stand up for him.

From that first time you shoved the bigger boys away from him and stood between them and him, Bob Floyd knew he would always be friends with you. Forever.

And you both stuck three to your 4 year old selves promises. All throughout your school years, you were side by side, ready to take on the world together.

It wasn’t until Bob left for the Naval Academy that you truly separated. You hated to admit it, but it made you feel like a lost puppy, heading off to college without your best friend, your partner in crime. It was like you had to learn how to function all over again. It was so foreign, doing things you would have normally done with Bob, all by yourself or with other people. Like moving into your college dorm.

Nevertheless, life continued on and you learned how to live without him. The two of you talked as much as your schedules allowed, and you were present for each other’s graduations. He had to pull some strings to get the leave, but Bob would have done anything humanly possible to see you on your big day, even leaving base without permission if he had to. You were his best girl, and nothing was more important than the precious and now limited time he got to spend with you.

And that’s how you ended up here, at Miramar, AKA Fightertown, staying with Bob on base for two months.

After the Dagger teams’ success with the Uranium bunker bombing, they were all able to remain on base to rest and recuperate. Along with this, they were able to invite one person onto base to spend time with for the duration. Immediately, you were Bob’s choice, no questions asked. At this point, it had been years since you had seen each other and you both were feeling it. You were more than best friends, you were soulmates. Those two people that are just destined to be in each other’s lives forever. Two peas in a pod.

“Bobby!” Your high pitch squeal could be heard through the outside rec ground as you dropped your bags and sprinted towards your best friend. Everyone was staring dumbfounded as Bob wrapped his arms around your waist instinctively when you wrapped yours around his neck, lifting you off the ground and spinning the two of you around. Your legs had automatically wrapped around his waist and you stayed like that for what felt like hours, your head nestled in his neck, but couldn’t have been more than a few minutes. Neither of you feeling the burning stares from Jake Seresin, Bradley Bradshaw and the other Dagger teammates. All of them staring in utter shock. This was not what they expected in the slightest when Bob had told them about his friend from home coming to visit.

“Well, well, well, good ol’ Bob does have game.” Seresin smirked as he sauntered over to the two of you, bringing you both back to reality. Bob gently but quickly dropped you from his tight grip, hand flying up to the back of his neck to scratch shyly. The rest of the group made their way over behind Jake, everyone equally as curious, just trying the more subtle approach.

“Are these your friends, Bobby?” You turn to beam up at him after giving the group a once over. God he missed your smile, and he automatically mirrored it back at you. "Hi, y/n! You're new here, right! Let me present you some of my... Uh well I guess I can call that a family." Bob gestured awkwardly to the group standing before them. There was an unspoken understanding that after the events of the Uranium bunker mission, the group was now more than just a team, they were a slightly dysfunctional, makeshift family. And it worked.

“We’ve got Jake Seresin, Bradley Bradshaw, Natasha Trace, Mickey Garcia, Javy Machado and Reuben Fitch. The others are… around somewhere.” He smiled at you sheepishly. “Guys, this is y/n, my best friend.” You felt your cheeks grow warm as everyone was staring at you, some eyeing you up more than others.

“Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you, y/n.” Jake reached out his hand, smirking harder than before if that was even possible. He brought your hand to his lips and placed a kiss to your knuckles, making you blush even harder.

“I’ve heard a lot about you, Hangman.” “All good things I hope.”

You could sense Bob stiffen next to you and you nudged his shoulder with yours. “How could you keep a girl like this a secret from us, Bobby?” “Don’t call me that.” Bob’s teeth gritted together at the sound of Jake using your nickname for him, you chuckled at his reaction.

“Sorry, Hangman, that name’s reserved for me only.” Jake raised his arms up in surrender, but something told you it would definitely come up again in future.

“So, how do you two know each other?” Bradley’s eyes shifted between the two of you. There was certainly a stark difference between you. Bob and his famous shy and reserved personality, he was always one to keep a low profile and never get involved in a fight let alone start one. And there was definitely a look about him that was the total opposite of you.

You, on the other hand, were loud and in your face, never afraid to start a fight if necessary, hence how the two of you became friends. And there was no doubt about it, you were beautiful. Conventionally attractive, yes, but there was something about you that just lit up a room no matter what the energy was before. You radiated pure and unadulterated joy.

Except for when you didn’t. And only Bob knew the true gravity of a situation when you were anything but your joyous self.

“We grew up in the same town.” You spoke for the both of you, noticing Bob was too lost in his thoughts to answer Bradley.

“Met the first day of kindergarten, and the rest is history.” The group eyed you both again as you stared up at him with nothing short of adoration, him staring right back at you, a lopsided grin spread across his lips.

“Ah, childhood sweethearts, how sweet.” Jake had a shit eating grin plastered on his features, knowing full well that you weren’t dating, he was just trying to get a rise out of Bob. Which worked, Bob went bright red, hand flying up to awkwardly scratch the back of his neck again.

“What? No we’re not-“ “We’re not dating.” You interjected, finishing his sentence that he was probably never going to get out.

“Just friends.” Bob added sheepishly.

“Oops, my bad.” Jake held his arms up in mock innocence. “Anywho, I’m not sure about the rest of you, but I’m ready for some grub.” The rest of the group all nodded in unison, mumbling some form of affirmation.

Bob had jogged back to where you dropped your bags, carrying them inside for you.

You trailed behind him, spying Natasha hanging at the back of the group.

“So, you’re the famous Phoenix I’ve heard so much about.” Slowing your pace to walk beside her, you eyed her.

“Should I be scared?” She mimicked your movements, eyeing you, only hers held a note of nervousness.

“Mostly good things,” you offered her a small tight lipped smile. “But I heard about that training mission.” Phoenix’s face dropped, not sure where this could possibly be going. She’d only just met you, Bob’s best friend, and she’d already ruined it.

“If he gets hurt, I’ll kill you.” You stopped in your tracks, deadpan as you spoke and there’s a beat of silence. Then another. You couldn’t see it, but Phoenix was sweating. When she heard her WSO’s friend was coming to visit, she couldn’t wait to meet her. Now she wasn’t so sure.

Until, you cracked a grin, nudging her with your elbow. “It’s my job after all, as his best friend and personal bodyguard.”

The sigh of relief Phoenix let out was definitely audible enough for you to hear, deciding ignoring it was best after the stunt you just pulled.

“I’m just glad you brought him back safe from that mission.” Your eyes wandered to Bob’s retreating form, smiling softly. You could see just from the way he walked how comfortable he was with his team.

“So am I, so am I.” Phoenix reassured you, a knowing smile playing at her lips as she watched the way you looked at your best friend. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you. Bob was pretty reserved with what he let on about you to the rest of the team, but he’s told me a lot about you, too.”

“Oh really, only good things I hope?” You smirked at her as the two of you started your walk back into the rec hall inside, getting to know each other along the way.

You didn’t notice it, but Bob was watching the two of you from the doorway, a content smile on his face as two of his closest friends were finally able to meet. He already knew that this was going to be the best two months he’s had in a long time.

[boa-h]

【Roronoa Zoro】 Small Town Summer

*first fic of the year wooooo!

00

Summers in the small town always felt like the sky had turned into a heater fan. Cicadas cried like a newborn baby and mosquitoes flew in swarms. A girl could be seen sitting in the unpaved streets, her pretty dress now painted with mud and dirt. In front of her, stands a boy with naturally green hair, “Ha! You lost again!” He laughs. A cry that did not belong to the cicadas echoed throughout the street, the girl continued to wipe her endless tears despite her dirty hands, “That wasn’t fair! It wasn’t fair!!” She cried.

01

You and Zoro have lived across the street from each other ever since you were born. With your families being friends, you two hang out very often — basically every day. However, you two are nothing alike, naturally, girls and boys are different. You like to play with your dolls and play house while he watches his Ultraman DVDs on the square block they call a TV. But kids are more energetic, therefore energy needs to be drained by running and playing outside.

Zoro’s kick that landed on your stomach was the start of everything, your loud cries were everything the neighborhood heard that night. Challenges became a normal thing between you and him, with competitiveness engraved in your bones, you never wanted to lose, but you always do. You can’t run faster than him, can’t lift more weights than him, and you’re even shorter.

Years passed slower than ever in the first decade of your life. You can barely remember anything in kindergarten. But you do remember that you and Zoro were in the same class for elementary school. His grades aren’t the best, at least below average of the class. But then again, surprisingly, elementary school had a lot of smart students. Then came junior high school, you two were no longer in the same class, but it was a time where you grew a tad bit taller than Zoro. Grades and height were the two things you surpassed him at.

In high school, coincidentally, the two of you are distributed into the same class once again. Understanding the fact that you and Zoro have known each other since childhood, the teacher arranged for you to be deskmates. If this was elementary school, you would rather move to another class than to sit next to him, this troublemaker could do anything to make you cry. But as years passed, his temper had calmed down a bit, at least he wouldn’t go looking for trouble again, and you were grateful for that. Being deskmates with Zoro wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be, on the contrary, you were glad that you had someone you knew as your deskmate, it somehow made everything easier.

02

When did things start to change? You ask yourself that. He was caring a little too much about you, and you were caring a little too much about him. As you lay with him on his bed, playing on the GameBoy consoles, he asked: “Are you going abroad?”

Your fingers paused on the gaming console, ghosting over the button as if you’re trying to decide on your next move. Your brain now fogged with the question Zoro asked, you closed the console and sat up with a sigh.

Going abroad was a rare opportunity during the time, your grades were the only thing that supported this opportunity, along with the family savings that were barely enough. But your parents wanted you to go abroad, they think you could have a much brighter future there.

“Maybe.” You replied, looking back at him, and he nodded. “What about you, what are you going to do without me?” You joked, “I know you can’t live without me.”

Zoro didn’t deny like you thought he would, “I’m going to do sports. Kendo, perhaps.”

Time flew by like a monster with wings, the College Entrance Exam soon released their scores. The grade you got was what everyone expected, not the best in the state but enough for you to go abroad. The sun was setting and your parents hummed in the kitchen as they prepared for a feast. You look outside the window, Zoro’s house was right there, and you suddenly wondered how he was doing.

A knock was heard on the door, your thoughts were cut off and you rushed to the door. It was Zoro. The sunset rested on his tanned skin and the chilly breeze blew through his short hair.

“How did you do?” Was the first thing he asked.

“Wasn’t bad, good enough to go abroad.”

His shoulders suddenly dropped, “Oh, I see.”

“How did you do?” You returned his question.

“I tried pretty hard, it wasn’t a bad score for me. I got admitted to a decent sports university.” He paused, “Are you really going away?”

“I mean, I would stay, but…” You played with your fingers, thinking for a reasonable answer, but still just shrugged in the end.

Zoro nodded in understanding. “When.”

“As soon as break starts.”

He nodded again.

04

The night before your flight, you asked Zoro out for dinner. It was a popular barbecue restaurant in the center of the city, people chatting and cars honking filled the night air. Maybe because it was too busy, the waiter surprisingly didn’t check Zoro’s ID when he asked for two bottles of beer.

“Surely you’ll get a good beating if your dad finds out about this.” You snickered.

“Tsk, don’t pretend to be innocent, you did steal those money from your parents, didn’t you?” He gestured to the money in your purse that you planned to use to pay for the meal.

“What do you mean “steal.” These are already mine, I just took out a few bills. Plus, it’s me who’s treating you tonight, don't complain.”

Zoro stuffed the meat inside his mouth with his chopsticks before raising both of his arms up in a surrender position, “Ight, whatever you say.”

You didn’t drink during the meal, but strangely you felt a bit drunk too, maybe because the grill was spreading too much heat around, but you felt really happy that night, even when the embarrassing moments of your childhood came out of the mouth of the person sitting in front of you. You couldn’t help but to think back to the sky that was always blue, and the days that always passed too slow.

In front of your house, you two stood on the front steps without a word.

Zoro opened his mouth but paused, he probably changed his mind on what he was about to say.

“I have practice tomorrow, so I won’t be able to send you off.” He says, “Have a safe trip, though.”

You nodded at his words, but didn’t reply.

As he was walking away, he paused in his steps and turned around. The corner of his eyes were a little red, maybe he was holding back tears just like you are as well. “If you ever come back to visit, I’ll be here.”

You squeezed out a smile that was even uglier than a frown, “I’ll keep that in mind.”

05

Summer was as hot as always in the small town. A walk from the newly built train station to back home wasn’t such a long walk but it felt exhausting. A lot of things have changed since the last time you’ve seen this small town. You hurriedly drop off your luggage and greet your parents before walking out of the house again.

A high school class reunion was suggested by someone in the class so here you are, rushing to the restaurant, being late already as your flight was delayed. The delicious smell of food entered your nostrils when you stepped inside the restaurant that was filled with nostalgia, you remember coming here often with friends during high school, it’s a very popular restaurant in the small town, and it still is.

“Sorry I’m late!” You apologized to everyone at the table, your friends’ eyes showed happiness and surprise to your sudden appearance.

“Oh my! I didn’t think you would make it today!” Nami exclaimed as she hurried you over to sit by her side. “Sorry we started without you!”

“Oh no, don’t be sorry.” You laughed, “It’s nice to see everyone.”

You noticed that not everyone was here, including the boy who used to live across from you, maybe some couldn’t make it after all. But the ones who are here greeted you happily, glad that you were here.

“Zoro said he would come after practice today,” Usopp took out his phone to check if he received any new messages, “Well, it is rush hour, a drive from the city to here could take some time.”

“The city?” You ask.

“Yeah, you didn’t know?” Nami cut in.

“No, we sort of lost contact with each other.” You chuckled awkwardly.

It is true, iphones weren’t a thing yet when you left, you had to get a new inserted card, losing your original phone number, plus the fee that came with international calls, you rarely made any calls, aside from perhaps your parents a few times a year. They were the ones who told you about the class reunion.

It turned out that Zoro was a pretty successful swordsman now, having competitions here and there, has a winning strike and has only been defeated by a man named Dracule Mihawk.

“Sorry I’m late!” A familiar voice called out as the restaurant door slammed open, revealing a certain mosshead.

“Oh, Zoro!” Usopp waved.

“Zoro!” His friends cheered.

The man standing in front of you is now taller than before, still with tanned skin and green hair. Sweat ran down his forehead as he caught up with his breath, a few red bumps protruded from his muscular arms, bitten by mosquitoes, you presume.

His gaze locked with yours the moment he sat eyes on the table.

“Oh, you’re back too.” He says.

“What do you mean, of course I am!”

The other people snickered.

“Aright guys, let’s get some more food now that more of our friends are here!” Luffy cheered.

06

Night was silent as you and Zoro walked back to the same old street you guys always walk back to.

“You’re staying in town tonight?” You asked him.

“I always lived in town.” He looked back in confusion, “Where else did you think I was gonna go.”

“I thought you moved to the city.”

He remained silent until you reached your doorstep, “I told you I was going to be here if you ever visit again.”

You were stunned by his words, “I didn’t think you were serious. I mean, your job is in the city now, so I didn’t think…”

You two stood in silence once more, he didn’t say anything. It was you who broke the silence, “Hey, have you ever thought of… I mean,” You struggled with your words, “Have you ever, perhaps, liked me? You know, not in a friendly way, but more of a romantic kind of way?” You asked.

“Huh?! Who would ever like—” Was his immediate response, as if the denial was carved into his bones.

You opened your mouth but nothing came out, that was stupid of you to ask that, it would’ve been a nice summer if you didn’t. You wanted to slap yourself, now your friendship is probably ruined, and he probably doesn’t want to have anything to do with you. “Sorry, I don’t think I should’ve asked that.” You apologized, turning away from him to reach for the doorknob.

“That wasn’t what I meant.” He grabbed your wrist. “What I wanted to say was that I was, and still am, desperately in love with you, okay? I didn’t know how to tell you, after all it was me who made you cry so many times when we were younger. I didn’t know if you would return my feelings. I was a coward, I didn’t want to know the truth.”

You stared into his eyes, realizing he probably did mean what he said, your eyes began to water. You left for so many years and he didn’t even give you a hug, then proceeded to talk about this nonsense that makes you want to cry. Zoro, seeing that you’re not replying to him, thought you still didn’t believe what he just said, so he brought your hand to his chest.

“Feel my heartbeat then, it’s much more sincere than me.”

[francescacollie]

( olivia cooke, cisfemale, she/her ) have you met francesca collie yet? you know, the 26 year old graduate student majoring in secondary education with a focus in drama. ring a bell yet? every time i walk past their dorm i hear heart it races by dr. dog blasting through the door. everyone who meets them say they’re admirable but can also be a little invasive. guess when you meet them you’ll figure that out yourself. — carita, 24, she/her, est, triggers: sexual harrassment/sexual assault

meet francesca ‘franny’ collie!

FULL NAME: Francesca (Franny to close friends) Joanne Collie

AGE: 26 years old

BIRTHDAY: December 24th

GENDER & PRONOUNS: Cisfemale, she/her

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual

POSITIVE CHARACTERISTICS: Witty, sweet, generous, intelligent, outgoing

WEAKNESSES: Nosy, stubborn, pessimistic, blunt

 THE STORY SO FAR ...

(trigger warnings: terminal illness, hospitals, substance abuse)

Francesca is originally from a small town in suburban Massachusetts. She is the youngest in her family, having two older brothers and a twin brother born 5 minutes earlier than her.

She was born with a genetic disease called cystic fibrosis, and initially only expected to live to be about 5 years old, but through medical advancements and participating in sports as a child, she was actually fairly healthy throughout her childhood. Most of her friends at school didn’t even know she was sick.

She lived a very cushy, privileged life, in part due to her parents wanting to give her everything they could, as well as the fact that she grew up in a moderately wealthy household, so money was never much of a worry. Two of her older brothers were highly protective of her and would do anything for her, whereas her twin brother deeply resented her for constantly being the center of attention, and was quite cruel to her growing up.

Her brother’s cruelty came in part because he was deeply struggling with mental health issues and substance abuse issues. Because the focus was always on Franny, his parents did not realize the issues he was dealing with, and instead admonished him for his behavior.

Throughout high school, Franny excelled in almost every way. She truly had an almost perfect life. Smart and athletic, whatever she set her mind to, she believed she could accomplish. She did nearly every extracurricular you could think of, from soccer to running track, and her personal favorite, theatre.

In college, Franny decided to major in both theatre and drama. She wanted to pursue acting on Broadway, or potentially try to make it as an actress in LA, where she planned on going to after Radcliffe.

Her dreams were cut short when her health quickly deteriorated after being on her own for so long. Growing up in a small town with an overbearing family, she was used to having a lot of things done for her. Taking care of her health felt like a full time job, and it didn’t take long for her to suffer the consequences of neglecting her health. She eventually moved back home and was able to recover enough to graduate with her degree online, but with serious consequences, and was no longer fit enough to chase her dreams to New York or bring herself to come to a casting in LA.

After stabilizing a bit and getting her act together somewhat, she decided she did not want to stay back home living with her parents. So, instead, she decided to move back to Radcliffe and pursue higher education. A benefit of this was that her brother already was there, so she could feel more supported and not completely on her own. She is pursuing her degree in drama education now that she has essentially given up on her true dream of being an actress herself, while also trying to figure out how to thrive in the fast life as a disabled woman. She’s resentful of her past as well as her brother, who she continues to clash with at times, but also itching to figure out what she really wants at this time in her life, and take a break from always trying to be so damn perfect. after all, life is short, right?

ADDITIONAL INFO:

Francesca is generally an empathetic and generous person. Her heart is rarely in the wrong place. However, growing up privileged and in many ways, babied by her family sometimes results in her having a hard time connecting with and understanding people from a different walk of life. She is very sensitive and empathetic to certain experiences, but struggles to connect with others.

She likes to be the center of attention ... but not for the wrong reasons. She’d much rather show off the abilities she does have, rather than focus on what she lacks. Because of that, she can appear a bit pissy and even bitter at times, but she's never truly mean. When she finds herself in trouble, she will absolutely use her situation to her advantage when it benefits her. She might have struggles, but she's used to getting a lot handed to her throughout her life and needs to be humbled sometimes.

She’s lonely, but won’t admit it (most of the time). She craves affection from others in her life, be it a friend or a romantic partner, and really just wants to know the people she finds interesting better. Sometimes this results in her coming off as a little (okay, a lot) nosy. 

She is a lover of all things nature. Loves plants and flowers. But she kills everything in her care. No green thumbs over here.

She is a massive foodie and really enjoys every type of cuisine, but definitely has a taste for fine dining.

Because she spent most of her life being somewhat self-absorbed into her appearance, she’s acquired quite the collection of clothes. Her style is very ecletic and feminine, think large colorful sweaters, tights, Mary Jane heels, and funky earrings. But she's terrible at makeup and usually just sticks to the basics.

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

Her twin brother! I’ll submit this as an official WC, but the only real criteria that needs to be filled is that he’s older than her, grew up in MA, and has struggled with substance abuse in the past (currently is fine as well). It’s a relationship I’m hoping to develop more and figure out along the way. Also, if an older brother would be preferred, we could work that out as well.

People she has collaborated with before: this could be someone she was in a play with for undergraduate, a student, a fellow TA (she helps teach drama), anyone that she's done anything with for her degree(s).

An unlikely friend: this is one of my favorite plots! Someone that comes from a completely different walk of life, have different struggles they are facing, but somehow get along and have a genuine friendship with one another. Someone who is more closed off and brooding compared to her unassuming personality is what I think of.

An ex-boyfriend - someone she left behind when she first left Radcliffe in her undergrad to move back home when she was very sick. Most likely a mutual breakup.

A former or current roommate from college: this could really go anywhere, but an easy connection for them to know one another/be friends

Anything else you can think of!

Also - I haven't gotten the invite to the OOC blog yet but hi, I'm Carita! I am an oldie from the RP community (started around 2014 I think?) and haven't in yeeeears but I'm so excited to again! I am still getting acquainted with the newest Xkit and whatnot so I may ask someone for help if I run into issues if anyone is willing, hehe. But I love plots and am super open so feel free to message me anytime!

[shelterpark]

Welcome Stan Marsh!

Name: Stan Marsh Age: 24 Gender: cis male Pronouns: he/him Sexuality: bi-sexaul Height: 6’0 Location: Denver QZ Occupation: QZ Soldier, Civilian Affairs Specialist. FC: Deaken Bluman Art Cred: emilyartstudio-s.tumblr.com [8:17 PM]

[8:17 PM] Brief History: It seemed everyone had it all figured out, and Stan was the only one floundering. Of course he had a good head on his shoulders, he had high morals and strong will towards the things to be believed in, but Stan found it hard to be passionate about something obtainable for him. Stan always believed himself too smart to be talented, but too dumb to do anything worthwhile. Despite this, Stan did well in school. Throughout middle school he maintained good grades and was a major player on various sports teams, such as baseball (which he continued after being on a local softball team throughout grade school), football (which he did through middle school but opted to not try out for once reaching high school), and later hockey.

Sophomore year of high school is where things within his family dynamic got shaken up. His parents were known to fight, that was just normal for the Marsh household and Stan had made some peace with that, but after his older sister Shelley went off to college, it was as if his parents took a sigh of relief and finally decided to stop pretending things were fine. They filed for divorce, this time for good, and Stan was left to feel the emotional strain of that decision.

Part of him expected it to be like the last time when he was 10, when they separated for a few months to allow his dad to explore whatever it is he had to do, but things were serious this time. Stan pulled between two households and put in the middle of his parents' fights (sometimes he thinks their fighting was the only thing they missed about each other), and tried to make sense of it all. His grades saw a brief decline, as well as his sudden absence from baseball practice as his anxiety and depression started to gain more control over him. Despite that though, he later found any excuse not to be home, and enrolls in multiple after-school activities (which he ends up dropping out of most of them to instead spend more time with friends), and drops from the baseball team to put all his focus into Hockey. (edited) [8:18 PM] When the time came to start thinking about college, the idea of his future left him queasy. He knew that he did not have a flawless academic record, nor did he have any idea of what he wanted to study. He had spent so much time dipping his toes into a little bit of everything, that when he really thought about it, he was not truly passionate about anything. He loved animals but did not have interest in being a vet, wanted to see a change in the world but did not have a heart for politics, and he loved music but did not want to live his life chasing foolish dreams like his father had before. So, being a misguided, lost and unsure teen who didn’t want to be at home any longer but didn’t exactly have a heart for school, there was a simple solution to this. Stan joined the military.

He wants some sort of structure, structure he did not get at home and would not get from a normal college experience. He could see himself heading down a road he did not like, considering Stan was no stranger to alcohol and was already regularly drinking to get himself through the day, he thought that the army might help curb that crutch and honestly distract him enough that he wouldn’t be able to think too much. It did do that for him, maybe too well. Stan felt a strain in his relationships with people he use to be close with, didn’t talk to his parents much and started to talk less and less with the friends he thought he was going to have forever.

Stan did find some footing when it came to school, studying sociology as a very “generally I don’t care but I have to pick something” solution to the problem of deciding a major. It seemed broad enough to get his foot in the door somewhere at the end of this phase (being the army) of his life. Despite that, Stan would find his degree to be useful sooner rather than later. When the outbreak hit, Stan had only just earned his degree, and was being sent to Denver to aid in the securing of the Quarantine Zone. He had little idea of what was going on, given he had never had any social media he was not seeing any updates people were posting before everything got shut down, so he didn’t know what he was coming into.

Entering in with a knotted stomach, his unease only got worse when he was ordered to take an active part in the cleansing of the city contaminants. Killing what he had interpreted as infected innocents left him shocked, and after everything had been said and done, with their men lost, Stan was ordered to step up. He was the only one with any education on identifying critical requirements needed by civilians in such a critical  situation as this, and also the only one stupid enough to accept such a big job.

So Stan was forced to step up into a task that was way over his head, beginning to coordinate, conduct and participate in the redevelopment of the QZ under military order. Designating supplies and setting up for medical staff, organizing the early distribution of food and supplies, and listening to the concerns of the civilians these soldiers were meant to protect for however long this outbreak lasted. Stan had a purpose now, and he was going to try to do his best to handle it all.

Over the years, as the city mutated into a phantom of the normalcy he had tried to uphold, Stan is trying to remain focused and sure that he is on the right side. However, in the face of the corruption of his peers and superiors, Stan is finding himself unsure of how much longer he can stand on such a crooked stage. (edited)

Crow || Stan — Today at 8:27 PM

[8:27 PM] 5 or more HeadCanons: • Stan has a difficult time picking which parent to spend holidays with after the divorce, actually spending the first Thanksgiving with the Broflovskis in order to keep the peace.

• Stan and Wendy broke up in sophomore year after Stan grew distant due to a stuff going on at home. The pair managed to grow close as friends however despite the breakup.

• Stan has a decent singing voice (that he had to work for) and can play the guitar rather well. He actually learned to play guitar from his dad during middle school, and Stan remembers it was one of the only times he and his dad actually got along. He managed to get ahold of an old guitar that he fixed up, and occasionally plays it when he’s alone in his apartment and can't sleep.

• Stan still deals with asthma, which is annoying to him because inhalers made before the breakout would be expired by now. He still manages to get ahold of one or two that he keeps for emergencies.

• Stan is always clean-shaven, he thinks facial hair makes him look too much like Randy, and he thinks it maintains him as looking professional (even if this far into the outbreak it wouldn’t even matter anymore).

• Stan is harder to bribe, unlike his fellow soldiers. Stan tries to maintain a moral high ground and not stoop to a certain level, however he finds himself sometimes being lenient on people he catches breaking rules (as long as no one else is around) and lets them off with warnings. He knows this is going to eventually bite him in the ass.

• Stan has a lot of quirks and tells to what he is thinking, Hands in his pockets, pinching his nose, and small vocal stims. His buddies in the army had dubbed these “Stanerisms”, and often teased him about it. Stan to some degree can brush these things off, except when things are pointed out to him that he recognizes is something he learned/picked up from his dad. Those mannerisms Stan internalizes and attempts to not do anymore (unsuccessfully) because he doesn't want to find himself being anything like his dad.

• Stan had cut his alcohol consumption while enlisted, and for the first year of his role in the Denver QZ he did not drink, however as the years passed Stan fell on old habits. He keeps a flask of whiskey on his person, and has a bottle or two stashed in his apartment. He does not get belligerently drunk, but feels like he needs to drink to deal with the general agony of existence in these trying times.

• For the first few months in Denver, due to his nerves Stan always felt queasy and  threw up often after he and his mates cleared out hoards of infected.

[decaysate]

washed up pianist semi ( nods to myself )

[fullsunstrawberry]

Enhypen as Different Tropes:

*Warning: Mention of hookup during Jays part

*No gifs are mine! Credit to the owners :)

*Writing Type: Enhypen as…

{enhypen masterlist}

Heeseung:

Ex Lovers

You and Heeseung dated all throughout high school. But both of you decided to go to different Colleges. With Heeseung going to Seoul and you going overseas. You both decided to split up because long distance wasn’t working.

You wanted to stay in the states since you’ve got family there but you got offered a really good job in Seoul. So you had to take it. To be honest, you really missed Korea.

Finding an apartment wasn’t easy in the slightest. But you finally settled in an apartment close to your new job. The hardest part wasn’t even the apartment hunting, it was the fact you didn’t know anyone in Seoul. You realized this when you got a raise and you didn’t have anyone to celebrate with.

Luckily there were a couple of work friends that invited you to go drinking. This was an opportunity to make friends so you accepted.

What you didn’t expect was all of them to invite their own friends. One guy named Jake even invited five of his friends. Telling everyone a couple more are on the way.

It was honestly overwhelming but you liked being around so many people having a good time. It was the first time since moving that you felt at home.

“Jake! So sorry i’m late, traffic” A tall guy rushes into the bar. Giving Jake a handshake and pulling him into the hug. “No problem man! Let me introduce you all.” Jake turns to the table while gesturing towards the mystery man.

“Everyone this is Heeseung!” “Heeseung, this is some of my coworkers” Jake announces gesturing towards the table.

“Which one are we celebrating?” Heeseung questioned

“Well, Y/N did just get a raise! Next rounds on her” Jake pointed towards me while smiling.

In that moment you locked eyes with Heeseung. He looked so different. More mature and definitely hotter.

He definitely recognized you… Because he couldn’t look away. “Congratulations y/n, i’m very proud of you” He softly smiled.

Jay:

CEO 

Since you just got a job in Park Enterprise as a secretary your friends decided to celebrate. That’s why you are stuck at the club the weekend before your first day. It was all fun and games until your friends kept buying you shots after shots.

You noticed a very attractive man looking at you. “Looks like you're having some fun.” He smirked. “I got a big day on Monday! Starting a new job” You winked back while taking another shot. “ Lucky you, I’m also celebrating” he continued “a promotion and a raise”

“Well maybe you should buy me a drink with some of your raise money” you winked while leaning closer to him.

“What if we get out of this place instead?” He replied leaning in too.

That’s how you ended up waking up with a strong grip around your waist. You couldn’t lie, you loved it. You looked around and realized just how big his bedroom was. It had a huge window basically covering the whole wall.

You slowly removed his arm from around you. Picking up your close from the floor. You didn’t want to stay any longer even though your body wanted to.

Shutting the bedroom door quietly you started to walk around, trying to find the front door. He lives in an apartment but walking around this feels too big to be an apartment. Does he live in the penthouse? Then it hits you, oh my god you just slept with a rich ass guy.

You finally found the front door which took you forever. When you hear him call out your name. Shit…. You quickly shut the front door and leave.

Now it’s your first day, you made sure to wake up extra early so you could get coffee and drink it in the elevator. You regretted leaving your one night stand so early but you had to remind yourself that it was just a hook up and nothing more.

Walking into Park Enterprise was shocking. It was huge with glass windows surrounding the walls.

You press the elevator button, glad you got there early. There wasn’t anyone else in the elevator.

What you didn’t expect was the handsome man from the weekend asking you to hold the door. Once he stepped in he noticed you in the corner. His face grew a smug smile. He pressed the top floor button.

“Why did you leave so soon?”

Jake:

Frat boy

Everyone on campus is always talking about Enhypens Parties. It’s so annoying… Especially since you have to sit next to the infamous Jake. All he talked about was how “Crazy” the last party was.

He’s been trying to get you to go every since the teacher paired you guys up for a whole semester project. At this point you're convinced that he loves to annoy you.

“ Come on Y/N! We’re almost done with the project. Don’t you wanna celebrate”

“By going to one of your amazing parties” you rolled your eyes

“Come on! Why not” Jake whined

“ Well for starters, my friends aren’t really party people and I’m not going to sit in the corner.”

“I’ll be there! I’ll even stay by your side the entire night!” Jake pleaded.

“If I go this one time, will you stop asking me” you sighed while shaking your head .

“I Promise! Make sure to wear something sexy” Jake winked

That is how you ended up in a frat house’s basement. You're not in the basement because everyone else is in there. No, actually the opposite. It’s the only part of the house that isn’t filled with other people. The only thing in the basement is a cute puppy. Maybe going to this party wasn’t so bad. You can barely hear the music from down here and you get to pet a cute dog.

“Layla?” Someone shouts while closing the door and walking down stairs “I got you some treats!”

You recognized the voice as Jake’s. You really didn’t want him to see you down here. What if he got mad because you weren’t supposed to be down here. Ugh why did you do this to yourself.

While panicking you heard a laugh. “I should have known you were down here! thought you ditched me.”

Looking at Jake he had a huge grin. “I see you've you met Layla. Isn’t she cute” He walked up to where I was kneeling and kneeled down to pet Layla.

“She is a cutie, She’s been keeping me company” You said while giving Layla head scratches. In which she started licking your face in return.

“She seems to be taking a liking to you. She’s just like her dad.” Jake winked while looking at your lips.

Sunghoon:

Enemies to Lovers 

Just hearing his name makes your blood boil. Sunghoon is always bothering you. It doesn’t help that everyone LOVES him. They only love him for his stupidly perfect face and his amazing ice skating skills. But there is more to a person than just being hot.

He was always out to get you. You thought that college would be different. There’s no chance both of you go to the same college…Right?.. RIGHT???

WRONG!

Meeting your roommate was honestly amazing. They were so nice and perfect. Moving in was easy. No one fought over which bed to get or which closet they wanted.

It was honestly perfect! Until you had to go to class and you forgot your headphones. Heading back to your room, you pushed your door open and saw Sunghoon laying down on your roommate's bed.

“SUNGHOON!?”

He was startled hearing your voice. “y/n? What are you doing here?”

“WHAT AM I DOING HERE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE! THIS IS MY ROOM!” You ranted.

Sunghoon looked puzzled for a second. “This is my cousin's room.” “im waiting for her to get back from class” He continued

GREAT! Just great! When you think you’ll never see him again, he appears.

You huffed out “This isn’t fair! I thought I got rid of you”

“Oh baby, you’ll never get rid of me.” Sunghoon shot you a wink.

“Maybe i’ll even hang out with my cousin more often, just to see you.” He stood up once he saw his cousin open the door behind you.

“Got to go! See you around.” Sunghoon walked by you, putting his hand on your hip to move you over so he can get to the door. Before he closed the door he made sure to blow you a kiss.

This is gonna be a long year…

Sunoo:

Teacher x Teacher

Sunoo is the elementary arts teacher, while you are the school librarian. Sunoo is always asking you if you need any decorations or help with the Library. His students love to make fun of him for always being so nice to you.

Today started off the same but the school was decorated for Valentine’s day. A bunch of pink and red hearts.

Sunoo greeted you in the hallway before he rushed to his classroom. He will usually start up a conversation and even sometimes walk you to the library. But today he looked like he was in a rush.

You loved being an elementary school librarian. Kids are unpredictable so there is never a boring day.

While you were preparing for a class reading, putting pillows and books on the floor, Sunoo was dealing with a bunch of questions from his students.

“Teacher! Who'syour valentine!” “I bet it’s the librarian Ms. y/n!” “Oh it’s definitely her!”

“Class! I do not have a Valentine.” Sunoo tried to get the class to settle down.

“Why don’t you ask Ms.Y/N”

Sunoo couldn’t help but blush a little bit. His class teasing him about his not so hidden crush is very common. But something about today, being Valentine’s day, made his heart flutter hearing your name.

“Okay class! Settle down. I can’t ask her to be my valentine, I don’t have anything to give her.” Sunoo tried making an excuse so the kids wouldn’t continue.

“We can make paper hearts and then you can give them to her!” One of the little girls said with a big smile on her face. He’s definitely not getting out of this one.

You have been waiting for Sunoo’s class for ten minutes already. You were starting to get worried. So you decided to walk to his classroom. Once you got there, you peaked through the window.

Your heart fluttered. Sunoo was surrounded by his students holding different shades of red and pink hearts. He looked like glitter exploded in his face. You can tell he’s been helping make the little art projects.

You decided to knock on the door while pushing it open to say hello.

“Looks like you all are having a lot of fun in here!”

Sunoo quickly faced the door, startled by your voice. “Oh hi Ms. y/n! We were making Valentine's” One of the kids spoke up.

Sunoo couldn’t help but stare at you. One of the kids nudged Sunoo’s leg and whispered “Ask her”

Sunoo blushed (even more if that is possible) “y/n I’m so sorry I forgot about the reading time. My students were helping me make Valentine's .”

“Aww that’s so sweet” You replied

“I was actually wondering if you would like to be my Valentines” Sunoo extended his hands to reveal chocolate and a cute paper heart.

“Oh my! I would love to!” You blushed, hiding your face. While the kids all cheered.

Jungwon:

Childhood Best Friend 

You’ve known Jungwon since learning how to walk. His mom used to babysit you when your parents were on business trips. Which was all the time. Jungwon’s house was basically your house too.

So when Jungwon started to make more friends and you didn’t. It was kind of awkward. Especially when he didn’t tell you they were hanging out at his house.

Walking into a room full of guys would make anyone nervous.

“Oh everyone, this is y/n my best friend” Jungwon patted the spot next to him on the bed. You nervously walked to sit in the spot he patted. Dodging all the legs.

four new friends! Not counting the ones you already know. Sunoo and Niki. School just started again. How is that even possible?

“Y/N this is Heeseung, Jay, Jake, and Sunghoon! He said pointing everyone out to you. “They are a year above us.”

They all waved at you smiling. At least they were nice.

They kept hanging out at Jungwons house. You don’t even remember the last time you hung out with Jungwon alone. But you were happy to also make new friends. Jay even started to teach you to cook. While Sunghoon tried to teach you how to skate.

What you didn’t notice was the fact Jungwon also realized how little time the two of you have spent together, alone. So he had to fix it. Calling you over for a movie marathon.

Once you got to Jungwon’s house you expected everyone else to be there too. But it was only Jungwon on the couch.

“Where is everyone else?” You questioned. Jungwon was taken aback by this.

“Everyone else?” He felt a hint of jealousy in his stomach.

“Oh I just assumed that they were gonna be here too. I was excited for Jay’s popcorn” You shrugged while taking a seat on the couch.

“Well i’m sorry Jays not here” Jungwon scoffed.

“Are you okay, Jungwon?” You looked at him and he had an annoyed look on his face…and that’s when it clicked!

“Oh my god! You’re jealous!” You raised your voice, teasing him

“So what if I am! You have been distant. Even when you're around, you're all over Sunghoon or Jay.” Jungwon ranted. You did not expect this. You thought he would just laugh it off.

“Jungwon-“ “See you don’t even call me Wonnie anymore!” Jungwon interrupted.

“All the guys call you Jungwon so I thought you didn’t want me to call you Wonnie!” You didn’t know where all of this was coming from.

“I love when you call me Wonnie because I love you. Jungwon rushed out without thinking. His eyes widened once the words left his mouth.

“You love me? Like, LOVE me?”Your pressed for him to answer.

“Okay, yes I do.” Jungwon was clearly nervous, stuttering a little bit.

“Wonnie, I love you too!” You wrapped your arms around him. He hugged you back tightly.

“Okay well now you have to be my girlfriend. No take backsies!”

“Really.. Take backsies…is this what i’m getting myself into” You laughed

“Yes it is” Jungwon made sure to kiss your forehead after every word.

Niki:

Boy Next Door 

Living in an apartment can be fun. But not when only old people live there. Since you were taking care of your grandma, you didn’t have any time for making new friends or even hanging out with your current friends.

But this changed one day when a family moved in next door. You’ve seen a boy around your age coming and leaving the building a couple of times. You wanted to go up to him and introduce yourself. But you couldn’t find the courage.

With the little time that you do get to yourself. You like to go onto the apartment's roof. Now, you aren’t exactly supposed to be up there but the door alarm has always been broken.

Usually it’s very quiet and peaceful up there. But today you can hear a faint song playing. You swear it’s Replay by Shinee. But you're sure no one from the building listens to them. Your apartment wasn’t known for being huge boy group fans, with all the older people living here.

You started to follow the music. Once you turned the corner, you saw a tall boy dancing. He definitely knows how to dance. Once he was done he turned his face. You then realized it was the boy that moved in next door. You went to hide behind the corner but he noticed you.

He walked to his speaker and turned it off. “Oh i’m sorry, am I being too loud?” He spoke.

You were caught off guard, not expecting his voice to be deep.

“Oh uh. I'm sorry I didn’t know anyone else came up here” You spoke moving away from the corner so you didn’t look like a creep.

“It’s beautiful up here isn’t it. It’s the only place where I get peace” He sat down on the ground patting next to him.

You walked over and sat next to him. Looking up into the sky.

“I have always gone here for peace.” you continued to ramble “since my grandma needs me. It’s like a 24/7 job.” You realized that you started to ramble so you switched the conversation asking him why he’s here.

“My parents are trying to open a dance studio so they're always fighting about different things.” He explained while looking at you.

“Did they teach you to dance?”

“Yeah, we had a dance studio in Japan but we moved to Korea.”

“So you're new to Korea?” You looked at him

“Yeah, maybe you can show me around sometime” he smiled at you.

“I will love to-“ before you could say anything else your phone dinged. “Oh i’m sorry my grandma needs me to get her medicine” You quickly got up to leave.

“See you again, Same time?” he asked

“Yeah” you smiled.

[the-case-book-of-fanfiction]

1989

Ship: Eddie x reader

Summary: Returning to Hawkins after years of helping Eddie through English class (and specifically poetry assignments), you make Eddie watch a new film with you called Dead Poets Society.

Word Count: 4, 298

Warnings: DPS spoilers (ish?), fluff, ending is waaaay sappier than I originally planned, mentions of the events of S4E9

Note: I have elected to ignore season 4's ending due to the year DPS was released and because that episode was just painful to sit through anyway.

☟ Continue below the fold ☟

Hawkins had been quiet in the past week since your return from college. The town seemed to have reverted to the same peaceful place its residents had known before 1983. It felt strange. You couldn't say you hated the peace, but a part of you did miss the adventure, knowing that danger was around the corner. That urge to chase danger had curbed quite a bit since '86, of course, which was probably the only reason you had survived three years of college so far away from home and the people (read: person) you cared about most.

Summer break had begun two weeks ago, and you'd come back to your hometown to visit your family and friends—and most importantly, Eddie Munson. You had seen him during break of course, but that was nothing compared to spending three consecutive months of summer with him in Hawkins.

You had your other friends to entertain, of course—Steve and Robin had both been sending you letters nonstop throughout the school year, but this summer was important. This was the summer before your final year of college, and you wanted to make it very clear to Eddie you wanted to get your life together (preferably with him, which he ought to know by now) before you graduated.

Practically melting in the scorching heat, you slammed your car door shut and bolted for the AC'ed depths of Family Video. Steve was at the counter, concentrating on organizing a stack showcasing new movies. He looked up when the bell above the door chimed, a grin spreading on his face.

"Y/N!" he said, holding up his hand for a high-five. "Are you starting today?"

Family Video had been your summer job since the summer before heading to college. You were working there again this summer, but you weren't starting yet. "Nope. I'm coming back next week."

Steve frowned. "Then what are you here for?"

You rolled your eyes. "Maybe Dustin's right and you really do need to be told everything."

He made a face. "No no no, I mean why would you come to your place of work if you didn't have to work yet?"

"Maybe she just wants to see us!" called Robin, peering out from behind a row of movies. She beamed at the sight of you.

"As much as I'd love to spend time with you guys, I'm actually here for a movie," you said, leaning on the countertop. "It's date night."

Steve raised his eyebrows, his mouth forming an 'O'. "I suppose you'll want something a little more, ah, intimate, shall we say?"

You laughed, whacking his arm. "Hardly. I've got something in mind. A new release, if you have it."

"We might," said Robin, leaving the stack she was shelving and peering at the new releases Steve was arranging. "How new?"

"June 2."

Steve's head snapped up. "Dead Poets Society?"

You grinned. "You know it!"

He groaned, not the reaction you'd been expecting. "Nancy's been making everyone watch it. She cries every time."

You shrugged. "I can't blame her. They killed off the best character."

"As per usual," Robin grumbled. "You know, they always do that. They kill of the ones I like the most."

"You and me both," you groaned. "So. You got it?"

"Uhhhhhh, lemme check the box of stuff we just got." Steve crouched below the desk and you stood on your toes to lean over the countertop. You watched him sort through movies, looking for the familiar movie cover.

Robin snorted. "You be careful there, Y/N, or Eddie'll think you're into Steve."

Over your shoulder so Steve wouldn't see, you mimed gagging. She snickered and went back to shelving movies as Steve peered at the pair of you suspiciously.

"Speaking of Eddie," began Steve, "have you guys figured it out yet?"

"After college plans? That's what this summer is for."

"And is the movie with the ending that makes everybody cry going to help you sort that out?"

You shrugged, suddenly mute and unsure of yourself.

Steve stood back up, Dead Poets Society in hand. "You alright?"

"Gotta be honest," you sighed, "I'm scared for the whole conversation." You toyed with the ring on your hand, a simple silver band that had your initials and Eddie's intertwined on the inside, as Robin came back over. "Y'know, the whole...having a life together conversation."

"You think he won't want to?" Robin asked, aghast.

You shrugged. "I don't think he won't want to, I'm just worried about the other things that might...might get in the way. His band stuff is always pretty time-consuming, and I don't want him putting that aside for me, but I also don't want to be shoved aside for the band, y'know? It's just..." You sighed heavily, dropping your head into your hands. "After everything that happened in '86, in the Upside Down—"

Blood covered your jacket, the smell of it drawing even more bats. Dustin howled, trying to keep them away from the pair of you, but a few slipped through. You screamed, shielding Eddie with your body. Your shirt came away soaked with his blood when you sat back up, pulling him into your lap.

"Stay with me, Eddie, please. You hear me? You're not going anywhere, love."

"I'm sorry," he whispered, voice thick and choked.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," you insisted fiercely, cradling his head. "Absolutely nothing."

Eddie grinned up at you, and you couldn't help but flinch at the sight of the blood on his face, in his mouth, coating his teeth. You knew how this ended in movies, and you hoped to God this wasn't going to be like that. "Yeah," he whispered. "I wasn't a coward this time, eh?"

"You are many things, Eddie Munson, but a coward is not one of them."

His eyes fluttered, his head dropping.

"Eddie? Eddie!"

"'M okay," he whispered. "I just...need a mo...moment..."

"Ed? Ed? DUSTIN! Dustin, c'mon, we gotta get him outta here!"

"Y/N? Y/N, you there?"

Fingers clicked in your face. "Earth to Y/N?" said Robin, both of them peering at you with twin expressions of worry.

You shook yourself out of the memory, more vivid than the ones that usually plagued you and took you back to that awful moment, to the beginning of the weeks where you thought Eddie wasn't going to make it out.

"Sorry...sorry, I just...got thinking about it again." You rubbed your eyes. "After all that, I don't know what I'd do without him. I mean, you guys saw what I was like. And that was just a few weeks! Life without him? I'd lose my mind."

"Does he know?" Robin asked. "About that week. This."

You nodded. "We...we talked about it before I left for college. It wasn't really a conversation he wanted to have, because he knows it scared me half to death, but...he had it. I'm just hoping he'll be okay with talking about it all again now."

"It's been three years," Steve said reassuringly. "He'll be okay. You'll both be okay."

You nodded, knowing Eddie would listen. The memory had shaken you, and Eddie would notice, so you needed some time before you had your movie date. At least he was with his band for a few more hours beforehand.

"Yeah. I'll, uh, let you guys know how it goes. Say hi to Nancy and the boys for me! I'm off to go see my gremlin child."

"Your gremlin child?" Steve echoed, raising his brows. You grinned.

"Dustin!"

"That's my child!"

You laughed yourself out of the store, listening to Steve shout his irate questions after you.

~❊~

You rapped on the Hendersons' front door. Dustin whipped it open, shouting something to his mother further inside, but his words dissolved into a joyful shout of your name as he flung his arms around you.

"You're back!"

"So are you! How's Suzie?"

Dustin grinned, almost bashful. "She's great! I told her all about you. She wants to meet you, she says you sound like a fantasy character come to life!"

You laughed. "Eddie says the same thing, I'm guessing they'd get along just fine."

Dustin giggled, the kind of giggle that meant he knew something you didn't. You narrowed your eyes.

"Alright, what's he planning?"

"Planning?" Dustin asked innocently. "Nothing. Not that I know of. No plans. Nothing at all."

"You are such a bad liar, Dustin Henderson."

"I am not, Eddie taught me!"

You snorted. "Which is exactly why I know those tells, Dusty. Ed can't hide anything from me." Dustin smirked, his gaze flicking over your shoulder. Realization dawned on you. "He's right behind me, isn't he?"

Tattooed arms swooped around your waist, lifting you into the air. You shrieked as he put you back down, his head resting on your shoulder. "Miss me?" he asked in your ear.

You responded with a grin and a quick peck to his cheek. You turned in his arms, draping your own over his shoulders. "What are you up to, mister?"

He pouted playfully. "No hello?"

You put your hands on either side of his face, thumbs resting above the pale, hardly visible scars left on his cheeks, and put your foreheads together. "Hello, Eddie Munson." You closed your eyes as he kissed you softly and pulled you into one of those warm bear hugs you missed during the school year. "I missed you."

He smiled, pulling back to see your face and brush hair out of your eyes. "If you didn't, I'd be worried."

"No need to worry, believe me." You pulled him back into a hug. "I thought you were rehearsing with the band."

"They practically shoved me out the door when I told them we had a date. So Dustin here helped me set up a little surprise."

You glanced back at Dustin. "How on earth did you two know I'd come visit Dustin?"

"You're a creature of habit," Dustin said matter-of-factly, "and you always come to visit."

"'Course I do, I gotta visit the kid I've got shared custody with," you said, ruffling his hair.

"'Shared custody' is not how you say you're his mom, sweetheart," Eddie laughed.

You smirked. "Oh, sure, but we've gotta share him with Steve."

Eddie rolled his eyes. "Not my kid!"

"You both say that, you know that right?" You glanced at Dustin. "They're gonna fight over you for the rest of your life, just so you know."

"I'm sure," Dustin sighed.

"You like me better, right?" Eddie asked, grinning mischievously over your shoulder.

Dustin paled and hurried to close the door. "You guys should really, really get to your date! You know, um, it's been a while, I'm sure you really want to, uh, kiss and—and watch a movie or—or something. Like that."

Eddie frowned at you. "Since when does he endorse us kissing?"

You laughed. "I'm pretty sure he's just trying to stay out of you and Steve's custody argument."

Eddie slung an arm around your waist, pulling you down the road toward the trailer park. "Kid's right, though. We should get to our date." You leaned on him, murmuring your agreement. "You got a movie picked out?"

You held up the copy of Dead Poets Society. "Yup!"

He raised his brows. "Sweetheart, am I gonna fall asleep during this one?"

"You better not. It's my favorite thing since, well..." You looked at him with a smile. "Since you."

He whistled. "Damn! It's been since '65 since you found something you liked? That's rough."

You rolled your eyes. "Not since you were born, you idiot. Since we met."

"Still a good ten or so years since then," he said.

"Ah, well. Let's just say every day with you has been like discovering my favorite thing all over again."

Eddie beamed. "You sap."

"You love it and can't pretend otherwise, I know you too well."

He kissed your cheek. "Yes, yes you do." He glanced at the movie again. "And now I've been replaced with a movie!"

"Not a movie, but maybe a fictional character."

Eddie dramatically smacked a hand into his chest, feigning offense. "Excuse you." You giggled. "Last I checked, fictional characters could not write you songs and play them for you. And they couldn't hold your hand." He laced his fingers through yours as if to prove his point.

You wrapped your free arm around his waist. "Alright, alright—the real thing is infinitely better."

He beamed. "Are you going to keep that opinion while we watch this?"

You looked up at him. "With this beautiful face in front of me? How could I not?"

"Sap."

"You like it."

~❊~

"Mr. Perry, will you read the opening paragraph of the preface entitled Understanding Poetry?" said Professor Keating, sitting in his onscreen classroom.

In a bored voice, Neil complied, reading, "Understanding Poetry, by Dr. J. Evans Pritchard, PhD. 'To fully understand poetry, we must first be fluent with its meter, rhyme, and figures of speech, then ask two questions. One: how artfully has the objective of the poem been rendered? And two: how important is that objective? Question one rates the poem's perfection, question two rates its importance, and once these questions have been answered, determining the poem's greatness become's a relatively simple matter."

Keating had, by now, gotten up in front of his bored students and now stood before the chalkboard.

"If the poem's score for perfection is plotted on the horizontal of a graph," continued Neil, as Keating drew what he spoke of on the board, "and its importance on the vertical, then calculating the total area of the poem yields its greatness." Neil looked up as Meeks copied down the graph Keating was drawing. "A sonnet by Byron might score high on the vertical, but only average on the horizontal. A Shakespearean sonnet, on the other hand, would score high both horizontally and vertically, yielding a massive total area, thereby revealing the poem to be truly great. As you proceed through the poetry in this book, practice this rating method. As your ability to rate poems in this manner grows, so will—so will your enjoyment and understanding of poetry."

Eddie turned to stare at you. "Are they serious? Is that what we were taught?"

You hushed him and pointed to Keating, who had at last faced his class.

"Excrement," he announced. "That's what I think of Mr. J. Evans Pritchard. We're not laying pipe. We're talking about poetry. How can you describe poetry like American bandstand? 'Well, I like Byron, I give him a 42, but I can't dance to it!'" mocked Keating, getting a laugh out of his students. Meeks was crossing out his copied diagram. "Now I want you to rip out that page."

The class grew deadly silent.

"Go on!" Keating prompted. "Rip out the entire page! You heard me: rip it out. Rip it out! Come on! Rip it out!"

Dalton slowly tore his page from his book.

"Thank you, Mr. Dalton! Gentlemen, tell you what: don't just rip out that page, rip out the entire introduction. I want it gone, history! Leave nothing of it! Rip it out, rip! Be gone, J. Evans Pritchard, PhD! Rip, shred, tear, rip it out! I want to hear nothing but ripping of Mr. Pritchard! We'll perforate it and put it on a roll! It's not the Bible, you're not gonna go to Hell for this! Make a clean tear, I want nothing left of it."

Meeks, ever the academic, turned to Neil. "We shouldn't be doing this—"

"Rip, rip, rip!" urged Neil, turning Meeks back around in his chair.

The classroom was filled with ripping and giggling as the boys tore the pages out of their books, some more messily than others.

Eddie looked delighted. "A teacher is encouraging students to deface books," he said gleefully.

In burst another teacher, Mr. McAllister. "What the hell is going on here?" he demanded, and the class turned to stare at him, their joy and amusement fading quickly.

"I don't hear enough rips!" announced Keating as he returned with a wastepaper basket, just before he saw the other teacher.

"Mr. Keating," Mr. McAllister said.

"Mr. McAllister," said Keating, still wearing his smile.

"I'm sorry, I— I didn't know you were here."

Keating spread his arms. "I am."

"Ah. So you are." McAllister's discomfort was growing, much to the pleasure of the students. "Excuse me." He slowly backed out of the classroom once more.

Keating walked between desks, taking the ripped pages in his basket. "Keep ripping, gentleman! This is a battle, a war, and the casualties could be your hearts and souls! Thank you, Mr. Dalton. Armies of academics going forward, measuring poetry. No! We will not have that here, no more of Mr. J. Evans Pritchard. Now, my class, you will learn to think for yourselves again! You will learn to savor words and language! No matter what anybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world. I see that look in Mr. Pitts' eye, like nineteenth century literature has nothing to do with going to business school or medical school. Right? Maybe. Mr. Hopkins, you may agree with him, thinking, Yes, we should simply study our Mr. Pritchard, and learn our rhyme and meter and go quietly about the business of achieving other ambitions. A little secret for you—huddle up. Huddle up!"

The class leaned in.

"We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race! And the human race is filled with passion. Medicine, law, business, engineering—these are noble pursuits, and necessary to sustain life, but poetry, beauty, romance, love! These are what we stay alive for! To quote from Whitman, 'Oh me! Oh life! of the questions of these recurring, Of the endless trains of the faithless, of cities fill’d with the foolish / What good amid these, O me, O life?' Answer that you are here. That life exists, and identity. That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse. That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse. What will your verse be?"

Eddie leaned toward you. "Okay," he admitted. "I see why you like this movie."

You let your hand, wrapped around his shoulders, drift through his hair, a wistful look on your face. "Imagine if we'd had a teacher like Mr. Keating."

Eddie snorted. "I would have passed. I would have paid attention. I like this guy!"

You laughed. "Is it just because you want to rip pages out of a textbook?”

He grinned. "Maaaaybe."

~❊~

Contrary to Eddie's initial skepticism, he seemed to enjoy Dead Poets Society immensely, particularly the part where the kids all shouted at the top of their lungs and stood on tables. He cackled loudly while he watched, drawing a giddy smile from you.

While Neil performed, Eddie turned to you. "Okay, I like this movie."

You grinned, hoping his opinion wouldn't change in the next ten minutes. It, of course, did.

"WHAT?! Y/N, HOW DO YOU LIKE THIS MOVIE?"

"Um—"

Eddie turned to you, in visible distress. "He—! He just—! He died! His father was a dick, so he—" He groaned, shoving his head into your shoulder. "I don't like this anymore."

You held him closer, holding your own tears back. "I know. It's got a horrible ending. I really don't know why they chose to end it the way they did."

"This may be the saddest movie you have ever shown me," he complained, his words and tears muffled by your shirt and shoulder. "How can you like this movie?"

You shrugged. "Well, I mean...it's poetry, and it's Robin Williams, and it's about refusing to conform so it reminds me of you, and it reminds me that life is fleeting so why not make the most of it before it's over, and it's like this...this realizing why people are important and that they even are important to you and how hard it is to go on without them. And that just kind of...resonates with me."

Eddie lifted his head. "Did you have that list prepared?"

"Kind of?"

He sat up fully. "It reminds you of me?"

"Well, yeah. You stand on desks a lot and you like to be loud and you're passionate about the things you love. You'd fit right in at Wheaton."

Eddie snorted, then started to laugh. "Y/N, look at me." He spread his arms, gesturing to the tattoos, band tee, and rings.

"Okay, okay, fine, not entirely," you laughed. "You're too you for that kind of school, but you get my point. You're unapologetically you, and that's what this movie reminds me of."

Eddie pulled you up to stand with him, swaying in place to music only he could hear. "And...what about that last part on your list. The important people part."

"That...reminds me of you, too," you admitted. "I... After everything we've been through and done together, you're my favorite person. I trust you the most, I love you the most, I am most myself with you. I can't really imagine life without you, and those few weeks I did spend without you, not knowing if you'd be waiting for me when I came back to your bedside..." Your head slumped until your forehead rested on his chest. Eddie's arms curled tightly around you.

"You're thinking about the hospital." It wasn't a question or a guess. He knew, just as he always did.

You nodded. "I was so scared I'd come back from the bathroom or a food run or checking up on Dustin and some doctor would tell me you'd gone while I was away. I couldn't bear the thought of living without you." You reached up, touching the tiny scars littering his jawline and cheeks. There were more, these more severe, covering his sides, reminders of what he'd gone through and what he had almost lost.

"You didn't lose me," he said. "I'm right here. I'm okay, I promise."

"I know that, it's just..." You sighed and pushed the words out. "Are you serious, Eddie? About the future. About...our future."

Eddie cupped your face in his hands. "If you're asking me if I'm going to stay with you forever, of course I am." He lifted your face, kissing you gently. "I know I might have seemed delirious, or desperate, or scared, or just plain insane, but I recall asking you to marry me in the Upside Down."

You remembered. Your heart had just about dropped to the ground when he'd said it. As you'd lifted him up with Dustin's help through the rift in his trailer, then climbed up yourself and hobbled to Max's trailer to borrow her car, Eddie had slumped onto your shoulder, had said "You don't have to save me, but I'm glad that you are. Will you marry me?" in the same breath, and then promptly passed out from blood loss. He hadn't woken up after that, and nothing was every said about his impromptu proposal after he woke up for another year, when you mentioned it in passing.

"You know, that was one of the most unromantic proposals I'd ever heard."

He made a face. "Have many men proposed to you?"

You rolled your eyes. "No, but I am a regular romance movie watcher. Usually there's a ring, some flowers, and crying."

"You were crying."

"I was ugly crying because you were gonna die and you were bleeding to death on my shoulder."

He sighed. "Okay, fine, I'll re-propose if that's what you want, and I'll make it as sappy as possible. But the point still stands. I wanted to marry you then, and I still do now."

"Like...now now?"

"Now as in now or in the future, sweetheart," Eddie said, looking into your eyes as if he could see your soul. He brushed his thumb across your cheekbone. "Don't you worry. I'm not leaving you. I asked you to marry me, and you can answer that question whenever you're ready, so I am more than prepared to spend forever with you." He pressed his mouth to your forehead.

You looked at him as his lips left your skin. "So if I were to say yes...after college, could we move in together?"

A grin started to pull at the side of Eddie's mouth. "You serious?" You nodded. "Absolutely. Absolutely we could live together."

"Then start house shopping," you said, "because here I am, saying yes."

Eddie beamed, and it was the largest grin you had seen in a very, very long time.

~❊~

When you stopped into Family Video to return the movie the next day, wearing one of Eddie's rings, Robin caught on immediately and started screaming.

"OH MY GOD, ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED?!"

You giggled, showing off your hand. "It's a temporary ring because it was kind of impromptu again, but—"

"AGAIN?" Steve demanded.

"Well, he proposed to me in the Upside Down but he was bleeding out so he passed out immediately after and I never got to answer, and—"

Steve took you by your shoulders and made you sit on one of the stools behind the desk. "Alright, that's it. You're telling the story from the beginning."

You laughed. "Well, it all started in 1979, when I met Eddie in our freshman year of high school—"

"Y/N!" Steve and Robin yelled.

"Alright, alright, fine. So it was just when the movie ended that we started to get serious and talk about it..."

"You mean after Neil died you had this conversation?"

"You wanted me to do it before?!"

"Steve, shut up and tell the story!"

Maybe Hawkins had gone back to its regular old self, and maybe you were floating through life with Eddie's ring on your finger, but these two certainly hadn't changed. It was a reassuring thought.

☞ ❊ ☜

Stranger Things // Eddie Munson

[selfcarecap]

Kiss It Better [p.p]

pairing: Peter Parker x reader

summary: Peter tries to prevent you from making a bad decision with your boyfriend-of-one-week. Little does he know, he’s got it all figured out wrong.

warning: mentions of sex, swearing probably, sad and jealous Peter but you know me there’s a happy ending, the paragraphs in italics are flashbacks

word count: 2.5k

-this is a repost of an old fic (i didn’t remember this fic but i actually really like it atwjshsj)-

Peter waits for you on your roof for a few minutes before he hears your beautiful voice fill the street.

A guy from college invited basically all the students to his house for a party. You’d been eager to go but Peter had more important duties.

Just as he felt like he’d done a thorough job for the night and was about to join you at the party, he received a text from you that you were leaving.

He didn’t really care about the party, he cared more about spending time with you, so he was going to surprise you and hang out a bit at your place.

However, as he watches you walk down your street, he sees you’re not alone.

Making you laugh, walking way too close to you, is this guy from one of your classes, Harry.

Why are you with him? And why are you two talking like you’ve known each other for years and standing so close?

Maybe he’s just walking you home, it is kind of late after all, that must be it. But that doesn’t explain the vivid conversation. He’s never seen the two of you interact. Ever. And all of a sudden you’re close.

Peter’s watching from high up as Harry steps in front of your door with you.

“Can I kiss you?” Harry asks. Peter’s sure you’ll say no. Harry’s got no chance, you barely know each other.

It happens in slow motion as you nod, standing up on your tippy-toes - damn, he’s tall, taller than Peter. You smile at Harry and peck his lips softly. Peter looks away.

“Would you like to go on a date sometime?” Harry smiles. Peter hates his advanced hearing right now.

He hates that you reply after a split second, “Yes, for sure.”

You say your goodbyes and you throw Harry a stupidly adorable smile before disappearing to go up to your apartment.

What now? Harry’s gone, also stupidly smiling. Peter doesn’t want to hang out with you anymore. He’d cry from jealousy.

Peter expects a call from you or a text. You tell each other everything, so of course you’d tell him about your night and more importantly your kiss with Harry.

It’d break his heart even more, to hear you gushing about it. But as far as Peter’s aware, you’re oblivious to his crush on you, so you have no reason not to tell him.

He waits for five whole minutes. No messages. No calls. He swings home with a bad feeling in his stomach and his heart a little heavier in his chest.

Peter knows he’s got no right to decide about who you kiss. But he developed feelings for you from early on in your friendship. He waited too long to tell you about it, you’ve become such good friends that he doesn’t want to sacrifice it.

Now he regrets it more than ever.

*

Peter’s plan to avoid you at school doesn’t really work. You had a few classes together and now you’re sitting together at lunch, along with Ned.

It’s Monday morning so no one’s got the energy to talk throughout the whole break.

But Peter can feel the nervous/excited energy radiate off of you. You haven’t really touched your food and you keep glancing at everyone, trying to start a conversation.

You catch him staring at you and decide to finally talk.

“So where were you on Saturday? You really missed out.”

“Yeah?” Peter tries not to sound as passive-aggressive as he wants to be, “What was so special about it?”

“The party itself wasn’t really all that. But I talked to Harry, the guy from our chemistry class?” You wait for Peter’s reaction. He nods, looking down at his food.

“Well, yeah, we talked a lot. He‘s really nice.”

You seem to notice Peter’s lack of interest and don’t talk more until Ned asks you to continue.

“Harry and I are going on a date tonight.”

“On a Monday?” Peter spits.

“What’s wrong with Monday?”

“Nothing.” Is that all he’s going to say? He wouldn’t know what else to say, and he can’t just tell you how he really feels right now.

You scratch your neck and get up, “I have to catch up on homework, see you later.”

*

Give it one week and you and Harry are acting like two stupid lovebirds, all for Peter to see. Or maybe he‘s just staring too much.

Either way, it hurts.

He’s watching you two from across the hall. Your fingers graze Harry’s and Peter hears you whisper, “Tonight?”

“Yes. Can’t wait.”

“Did you get the…” Harry nods at you knowingly. What? Did he get the what? What word wouldn’t you want to say out loud in the hallway?

...

Condoms.

Oh no no no--

Peter can handle you two flirting in front of his eyes. Not without a little jab at his heart after every word - but he can somehow survive that. But not the thought of you sleeping with Harry. Not after you’ve known him for a week. Just no.

He has to stop you.

Peter hurries towards you, throwing an arm over Harry’s shoulders and one over yours, startling the two of you.

“Hey, you two! You doing something tonight?”

You look at Harry, “Yes actually.”

“Cool, can I join?” You’ve never been able to say no to Peter’s puppy eyes that he’s currently giving you his best version of.

This time it’s Harry who speaks, “It’s a date kind of thing, sorry, dude.”

“Oh that‘s fine, you two won‘t even notice me.” He’s giving you serious puppy eyes now, which is probably the reason why you can’t look into his eyes when you shoot him down.

“Sorry, Peter. Not tonight. We‘ve been planning this and it‘s just us two.”

Peter doesn’t want you to be mad at him, so he stops pestering you for now, which doesn’t mean that he’s giving up.

“Okay, have fun then. Maybe next time.”

You give him a grateful smile for dropping it and walk away, hand-in-hand with Harry.

Peter groans internally. It’s evident that your and Harry’s relationship has been fast-paced, kissing the same day that you talked to each other for the first time, and walking together as an official couple in public already.

But sex is different. Peter knows you’ve never done it before, and he always dreamt of experiencing his first time with you. Right now it’s not about him though, he only wants to stop you from making a decision you’ll regret. You should not trust Harry enough for this yet. How can you think this is a good idea?

*

Not even five minutes after Harry rings your doorbell, Peter does the same. He’s been following Harry all day, just to make sure.

You let him in and watch expectantly as he sprints up the stairs.

“Peter?” You say loudly enough so Harry inside the apartment can hear.

You’re wearing sleep shorts and a tank top, but he can see a lacy bra strap peeking out. Lingerie?

Peter invites himself in, walking to your room but he sees Harry in the living room, bedsheets spread out on the fluffy carpet.

Of course. Your bed is a single bed, not exactly enough room for two people to roll around on. But your living room carpet is big and comfortable enough.

Harry coughs as Peter walks in, hiding something under the sheets.

Before either of them say anything, you scuffle into the living room, huffing, “Peter, why are you here? I told you we wanted to be alone tonight.”

“What’s more important is, what are you two doing here?” Peter grabs hold of the sheets, pulling them up into the air quickly, expecting condoms, maybe lube.

He blinks. Confused.

“Star Wars DVDs?”

You and Harry throw each other a look.

“So.. you’re not having sex?” Peter cringes at himself.

“What? No- why would you think that?”

“I- I don’t know, I overheard you two and it sounded a lot like it..”

“Is that why you‘re here?” You ask.

“Yeah I..” he can’t make his crush obvious now, you might not be sleeping together but Harry is still your boyfriend, “I just... I wanted to make sure you‘re not making a huge mistake by sleeping with a guy you barely know. That’s what … friends are for.”

“If I did want to sleep with him, then you wouldn‘t have any say in it,” you argue.

“I know that. But I also know you. And I knew that it couldn‘t be that you were going to sleep with Harry,” who’s sitting there, staring out of the window while you and Peter are lowkey arguing, “but I thought you said you were going to do it, that sounded so… weird to me that I needed to check up on you.”

You take a deep breath and seem over it. You don’t want Peter to think he has the right to make decisions about your body, but you can’t argue with what he’s said.

“So,” Peter wonders, “why were you being so secretive and weird about Star Wars?”

Now Harry’s looking again. Looking guilty.

“We‘ve never watched any of the films,” you answer.

Peter’s speechless. Mouth hanging open. You try to defend yourself quickly.

“See. Especially as your best friend, I knew how you‘d react. I remember you were once being super serious about how you wouldn‘t be friends with anyone who hasn‘t seen Star Wars. So I always played along, pretending to know what you were talking about. I would have told you but I’ve pretended that for such a long time now that I was embarrassed to admit the truth.”

“I must have been like twelve when I said that. On a serious note, I couldn‘t care less if you‘ve seen Star Wars. But if it‘s so important for you to watch it, we could‘ve watched it together.”

“It was only important to me because of you.”

You and Peter share a moment. It’s interrupted by Harry, “So are we or are we not watching Star Wars now? Because the popcorn‘s ready.”

You take Peter’s hand, despite your boyfriend sitting only a few feet away, “Do you want to join us? I’d love to watch Star Wars with you.”

Peter sits between you and Harry as you watch the first film.

You keep glancing at Peter, which annoys him at first - you’re supposed to be watching the film, not him! - but then he’s also grateful that you’re paying so much attention to him. He’s barely spent time with you lately.

*

You’re all alone on the top floor of the party host’s house. The party’s going on downstairs, but without Peter, you don’t really feel like participating.

Speaking of him, you spot a framed Star Wars poster on the wall. He loves those films so much.

“I‘ve never watched it. Is that bad?“ A voice comes from behind you.

You turn around and see Harry, a classmate you’ve never really talked to before. “Huh?”

“Star Wars.”

“Don’t tell anyone but I haven‘t seen any of the films either. I know a few things, but only from conversation,” you say.

“Finally an ally. Everyone hates me for not having watched it before.”

You smile at him, “My best friend Peter would freak out if he knew I haven’t seen them.”

He smiles back, “We have chemistry, right?”

“What?”

“At college?”

“Oh. Yes, yeah we do.“

You give him another polite smile, not sure where the conversation is going.

“This might be a total shot in the dark,” he says, “but would you want to watch the films together? You seem really nice and it would be cool to have someone to watch them with who doesn’t judge me because it’s my first time.”

You agree right there, and somehow end up talking the whole night. You two could become friends.

*

“Hey, Pete. Can you do me a favour?” You’re finally hanging out again, at his place.

“Always.”

“Can you kiss me?” You say it so nonchalantly, he’s not sure how to react.

“You have a boyfriend.”

“I felt so out of place last week during that Star Wars thing,” Harry explains, “Like I was third-wheeling even though I’m your boyfriend. You know, maybe we should just be friends?”

“I didn‘t mean to make you feel excluded. I‘m sorry,” you frown.

“Don‘t be. I know you didn‘t do it on purpose. But clearly you and Peter are or at least should be something more than friends. I don‘t want to come between you two.”

“So friends?”

“Friends.”

“I’m not with Harry anymore,” you tell Peter. He tries to stop himself from grinning, “Oh no. How come?”

“We realised we’re better off as friends. Now can you kiss me?”

“Oh, um. Yeah okay.”

You scoot closer to him. Peter leans forward too.

You meet him halfway before he gives you a quick peck on the lips, he stays close to see your reaction.

Slowly opening your eyes, you bite your lip.

“Woah. So that‘s what a kiss is supposed to feel like?”

“But you‘ve kissed Harry before,” blegh, “I don‘t understand?”

“I realised that I don‘t think I ever really liked him... like that. I should have known that from the start.”

“Why did you say yes to being his girlfriend then?”

“No one‘s ever asked me on a date before, so it was exciting. And I have a bit of a problem differentiating between friendship and feelings that go beyond that, I guess,” you hint, but he’s not sure you’re talking about him.

“Back to the kiss, why was kissing me so much better? What was different about the kiss?”

“I felt.. stuff”

“Stuff?”

“Yeah like butterflies. And emotions. And I want to do it again. I kissed Harry like three times, and it was just like kissing a wall. I never had the desire to do it. He didn‘t force me. But it never felt good for me. Not bad but like I said not desirable either.”

“And.. I made you feel better?” Peter wants to hear you say it.

“Yeah, you did,” you nod shyly.

“Let‘s do it again, then.”

“No, Peter, wait. H-how do you feel about this? About me?”

“I feel the same. The kiss was amazing. But I‘ve known that I liked you for a while.”

“You have?” you grin.

“Yeah, it broke my heart, seeing you with Harry.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you pout, visibly hurt at hurting Peter, “D’you think I can... kiss it better?”

“Guess, we’ll have to make out to find out.”

You grin before pressing your lips back against his.

[neesieiumz]

6 Months {Izuku Midoriya x Reader}

(Pro-hero!Izuku Midoriya x Former Pro-hero!Reader)

[PART ONE] [PART TWO]

L E A V E.

Summary: You were done. Done with everything. So what do you do? You move on. What's new? What's old? And who makes an even bigger space in your heart?

A/n: So this isn't based on another song, well technically it's still based on Sorry, but it's more like a part two to sorry than it being it's own separate part, you feel me? I know it took longer than expected, but there were so many paths I wanted to take and I didnt feel like rushing it. I really wanted to focus on flashbacks for this final part, your decision to leave the pro-hero scene, when Izuku and Melissa started to see each other... etc... I always made a gateway... in case I wanted to continue you and someone else's romance if I ever felt like it... So enjoy!

Support me on Kofi! Commissions are open!

Word Count: 8.0k

Warnings: Implied NFSW, but no deed is actually done, light drinking, (all in good fun)

___

Falling into your mother’s arms, you spilled everything from last night and this morning. On how you eavesdropped on his conversation, the confrontations from both this morning and at the brunch. Your father wasn’t home, left earlier this morning for his job. Both you and your brother moved out not too long after high school, him going on to college to become an engineer, and you moving into an apartment with Mina and Jirou while you worked for the same hero agency. Your mother was your closest confidant, she was the only one who could come to mind to tell her about what happened. She just held you, rocking you as you cried, cried about your broken marriage, and seeing the girl your husband abandoned you for. You cried about how both she, your dad, and your brother were right. How you should have never listened to him about giving up everything you worked so hard for. She held you in her loving arms, whispering sweet things in your ear.

“I should have listened to you,” you sobbed, holding one of the throw pillows close to you as you sat up on your couch, leaving her hold on you.

Your dress was bunched up to your knees so you pulled the wrinkled material out from under you as you shifted around on your mother’s leather couch. She pulled you into one last hug, the warm embrace making silent tears fall down your face. Your mom pushed the braids falling out of your now-loose bun from your tear-stricken face. Continuing to caress your face slowly, her slightly rough hands provided a familiar comfort from your childhood.

“This is not your fault, you can not blame yourself for his infidelity, nor can you blame yourself for sticking by your husband’s side and decisions. You did what you thought was right and absolutely no one can give you shit for believing in your marriage.” Her soft voice provides extra comfort to you.

“WHAT?!?”

You were in your family home, six years ago. You still had a couple of bandages around your face and arms. Recently, you just completed physical therapy, nearly regaining full control over your limbs. The fight you had was brutal, nearly leveled the entire city. However, you came out successful from it, even if it put you out of commission for over a year. However, since you’ve woken up, you and Izuku have been having intense conversations about the two of you and your futures together, which led you to the decision you’ve made today.

“YOU’RE RETIRING?!?!” Your brother yelled, standing up swiftly out of his chair.

You took a deep breath, keeping your head down as you nodded your head. It was just you, your parents, and your brother here, Izuku currently being in the top 25 heroes, had a lot of work to do so he could join you as you broke the news to them.

“Izuku and I have been talking and seeing how fast he’s going in the Hero Charts. This incident caused us to do some major thinking. The two of us worrying about each other on the job isn’t healthy. Having two heroes in a relationship, especially two who are going as high in the ranks as us as quickly as we are. Considering how there are a lot more people expecting Izuku to go higher since he’s All Might’s prodigy. So, I’ll be retiring and helping Izuku with his career from the sidelines.”

You let out another deep breath as you finished your monologue, your fingers twitching in your lap. You knew this was a decision your family wasn’t going to agree with, after all, it’s not like you don’t have your legacy to meet up with. Your mother, before Miruko, was the highest-ranked female pro hero in all of Japan. You had her legacy to go after since your brother decided to go into the family business with pro-hero gear.

“You can’t be serious!! After everything, you’ve worked for?!?! You’re just gonna give it up BECAUSE IZUKU SAID SO?!”

Your brother was the most pissed, after all, it was always both you and his plan that the two of you would live up to our parent’s legacy. He would become the best support gear inventor and you would become the best pro hero. So saying this puts a damper on the dreams you both had.

“You had one bad fight with a villain, but the doctors said you’re going to be cleared right?” You nodded your head at his question, “so why? Why would you need to retire after that one fight?!”

“Izuku proposed.”

Gasps of shock flew from heri mouths, you smiled sadly as you pulled your hand from under the other, revealing the small, silver ring with the pure cut diamond sitting perfectly in the middle of it.

“He’s the love of my life, and he’s the man who I want to spend the rest of my life with… to have kids with. We both understand how difficult this job is, and we both know how much I wanted to become a pro hero, but since he’s my endgame… something had to give. And so I did.”

Next was your father, having raised you since you were 3 years old. He saw how much you looked up to your mother, and to your grandmother as well. You come from a line from female pro heroes, and it was always your dream to continue that. He’s always supported you throughout the years, remembering all the times the two of you would work in his workshop on new hero gear, both with your brother and without as well.

“Y/n, don’t you think you’re rushing into this decision? This is everything you’ve been working for, and you’re gonna throw it away?”

“I know your concerns but this is for the best for me and him. I know being a pro hero was what I wanted, but…” you trailed off, looking away from your trembling hands.

Your mother, who was sitting beside you, could only stare at your trembling hands. Almost reminds her of the time she told her mother who she was marrying. How nervous she was, not because she was putting her career on the back burner, but because of what happened the last time she decided to pursue a romantic relationship with someone. She got you out of it, but it was still a painful journey. She took a deep breath, before shifting herself to where you were. She placed her hand on top of your own, making you look down at them before slowly turning your head to look at her.

“Are you happy?”

The question caught everyone off guard, their heads turning towards your mother. You slowly nodded your head, smiling at all the memories you’ve made with Izuku. When you first met as a transfer student, your first date and everything else.

“Yeah Mom, I’m happy.”

You took a deep breath, leaning forward as you shook the memory out of your head.

Meanwhile, your mom tried to lighten the mood, “Well, let’s hope your father doesn’t get to him… you know he doesn’t play about you… or your brother either.”

“He won’t be able to land a hit on him unless Izuku lets him.”

“Well, he better let him then!”

You laughed out loud at that, throwing your head back against the back of the couch. You could feel your mom get off the couch, leaning up as she headed to the dining table. Looking through the papers stacked on the wooden table, she pulled out a business card before walking back to where you were still seated on the couch. Your mom sat back down in her original seat, before handing you the same card of laminated cardboard paper.

Renai Miya, divorce attorney at law.

“Renai is a good friend of mine, she gave me that in case anyone I knew was getting advice soon. I’m sure she didn’t expect my daughter but I’m sure she’ll be able to help you out.”

You looked over at your mother, who just gave you another knowing smile. She just rubbed at your shoulders in comfort as you pulled out your phone.

---

Izuku was sitting at his office, ignoring the texts from both Shoto and Katsuki. After the argument and confrontation from this morning, he decided to stay in the office today and complete some overdue paperwork. Typing away on his computer, his mind began to shift from the email he was sent to the hero commission to the argument that happened between him, Kacchan, and Shoto.

“I’m sorry, YOUR WIFE JUST TRIED TO KILL YOU! We don’t know what would have happened if we hadn't come when we did!” Katsuki yelled, throwing his jacket off of his body.

“Izuku, this is a serious matter. We need to know what happened,” Shoto explained next, kneeling in front of Izuku’s crouching figure.

Izuku just shook his head, diving his head into the insides of his elbows. Shoto and Katsuki looked at each other, the concern shining in their eyes. They looked back at their trembling friend, who was now starting to rock back and forth while whispering “I fucked up.” over and over again.

“Izuku,” Katsuki started tentatively, “what did you do?”

Izuku stopped trembling and his rocking ceased as he raised his head slowly, locking eyes with his childhood friend. Katsuki’s leg began moving up and down in anticipation, waiting for him to say something.

“I don’t want to report this, trust me. So just pretend you never saw that.” That was all he said before standing up, pushing past them.

Izuku shook his head, focusing back on his emails. He sent the long paragraph he was typing, after making sure there were grammatical or spelling errors. He then leaned back against his office chair, throwing his head back. A gross, yet very familiar feeling was arising from his stomach, it was slimy, it was painful, it was guilt. He felt guilty, remembering how his wife looked at him at breakfast and right before she left. How the look in her eyes felt more painful than other villains could ever inflict on him.

Closing his eyes, his mind slowly drifted to a memory, a memory from three months ago.

It was dark, and Izuku was tired, so very tired from the shift he worked. However, he needed to do this. He needed to end whatever the hell he and Melissa had. The way they were conversing over private messages was getting too much. In a week would be his wedding Anniversary, and how his wife, Y/n, surprised him, reminded him about what he and Melissa had.

And how wrong it was.

He wore a black, sleeveless turtleneck, paired with a dark coat along with dark jeans. He had fake glasses on his face and his curly was positioned to cover his face so people wouldn’t recognize him. He kept his head forward as he approached the apartment complex Melissa mentioned she was moving into. After living on I-island for all of her life, she wanted a change of pace, especially since what happened with her father way back when. So she got a job as a top hero support inventor at the company where Izuku got his extra gear from. Since it’s also where Hatsume worked as well. He opened the door and walked into the lobby. He looked around the expensive-looking area, seeing the receptionist, and only one other person sitting on the complementary couch talking on the phone. He walked to the receptionist, who greeted him with a smile.

“Are you here to see someone?”

He nodded and gave his fake name, the one he told Melissa he’d be using, along with the apartment number that she gave him. The receptionist simply smiled before typing in her computer, before reaching over to the phone and pressing a couple of the buttons. Izuku could hear someone pick up, a muffled voice through the phone.

“Yes, Ms. Shield, A Iseada L/n is here to see you.”

Izuku took a deep breath, hearing the fake name he gave along with his wife’s maiden name. The receptionist gave off acknowledging hums to the person on the phone, who Izuku knew was Melissa. He rocked himself against his heels, feeling his fingers twitch around in his pockets.

“Alright, I’ll send him right up!” She ended the call, placing the phone back in its holder.

She then smiled at Izuku before pointing at the elevators behind him, “you can use an elevator. Ms. Shield lives on the fifth floor.”

Izuku nodded and thanked her before turning around to the elevators. He picked on towards the left and stepped inside of it, waiting for it to close before choosing the button that said “five.” The doors closed as generic elevator music played throughout the rising mechanical box. Izuku sighed, pulling off the fake glasses, before pushing his curls out of his face.

Third floor…

Fourth floor…

The elevator dinged as the door opened, revealing the fifth floor. Izuku stepped out of the elevator, using the signs on the walls to find his way to Melissa’s apartment. Walking past all the other doors, of the patrons of the apartment, who were currently sleeping to the world. Unaware that their number one hero was sneaking past them, claiming to be ending an illicit relationship.” Seeing the apartment number up ahead, Izuu could feel his heart beat faster. Taking another deep breath, he stopped right in front of the pitch-black door. Swallowing his spit, he closed his eyes before knocking on the door a couple of times. Almost immediately after he knocked, the door opened, causing Izuku’s eyes to shoot open, jumping back a little as Melissa stepped into the doorframe. Izuku was about to speak when his eyes drifted down to what she was wearing. It was a simple white t-shirt, ending right at her upper thigh. Izuku licked his dry lips, before looking back up at Melissa’s face who was giving him a knowing smile, that looked smug as well.

“Izuku,” her usually peachy tone came out a little subtle, silky and sultry, “I’m so happy to see you after so long. Come in.”

Izuku simply nodded as Messlia stepped to the side, allowing him to enter her expensive apartment, which could be classified as a penthouse. Izuku looked around, his eyes landing on all the decorations around her living room. He walked toward her wall, where she hung pictures. There were pictures of Melissa with her dad, her mom, All Might, and a couple of her friends from I-island. He continued looking around, before his eyes landing on a picture of the two of them, back when he was a first-year.

“You were so short back then,” Izuku heard Melissa say, as she came to stand next to him.

Izuku just nodded, continuing to look at the frames. He was enveloped in the nostalgia he was facing when he didn’t even notice Melissa coming up behind him. He only noticed her when he felt a hand coming up around his waist. He froze, his heart pounding away in his ears. She then stood right behind him, before pressing up against his back next, her hands now circling his waist.

“Melissa…” he started, feeling her fingers mess with his zipper and belt under his overcoat jacket.

God, was she wearing anything under that shirt? He could feel her breasts, her hardened nipples pressing against his back. He took another deep breath, licking his lips before moving his hands to where her own was and prying them off his belt, just as she was beginning to unbuckle it.

“Melissa, we can’t do this. I’m married. Happily married at that. I can’t keep doing this to her.”

Melissa only hummed, moving her body from behind his own, stepping in front of him. She was wet, her long wavy dripping down her face and body. The water from her wet hair dripped onto her shirt, her white, very thin shirt. Izuku’s breath hitched as he slowly glanced down her body, her nipples visibly being shown through the fabric.

“Yet, you can’t keep your eyes off me Izuku.” Hands grabbed at his jacket, pulling him closer to her.

Izuku gasped as Melissa brought her hand, cupping his face before bringing it down. Izuku gasped once again as he felt lips upon his own, feeling her other hand reach inside his jacket to pull him closer by the waist. Izuku was about to push her away, he needed to push her away. God, he was married for fucks sake, to someone who loved him dearly. But her lips, they felt so good to him. Glossed from the shower she took, they tasted of mint and strawberries. Izuku, taking a deep breath, went to push off his jacket, never letting go of the kiss. Mellissa, smirking into the kiss, helped him out of the jacket before squealing as Izuku scooped her up before slamming her on the wall.

“This is a one-time thing,” he mumbled against her lips, using his hips to hold her up against the wall as he took off his shirt next.

“Yeah…” Mellissa said with a skeptical tone, feeling his hands go under her wet shirt next.

“A one-time thing…”

Izuku groaned, throwing the papers in his hands across his desk. Taking a deep breath, he pushed himself out of his desk. He stood up from out of his chair, walking over to the wall which was replaced with windows, looking down upon the city of Mustafa. He could hear the faint sounds of cars driving and honking, he could see the civilians, everyone he protects. Looking across the street, he could see a cafe. It was one that he frequents since it’s so close. The door opened, and it revealed a couple. A laughing couple. The man was holding a medium-sized bag, with the logo of the cafe plastered across the bag. He was wearing a dark brown suede jacket that was buttoned shut. The woman was wearing a matching jacket, wearing as a dress, her curly hair pulled up in a bun. She held their coffees as they walked along the sidewalk. Izuku smiled sadly, before looking over to the couch in his office.

Laughter rang out inside the office, the sun had already gone down a long time ago and the night shift heroes were all out patrolling, leaving Izuku, a couple of sidekicks, and a couple of more janitors. It was your anniversary, but unfortunately, a string of villain attacks happened today. This pulled Deku out of his day off and kept him away. So, you decided to surprise me with dinner at his office. You cooked shrimp alfredo, packing it in pretty containers, before stopping by a couple of stores, buying a fancy cake that said “Happy Anniversary.” The last thing you bought was some expensive alcohol, a bottle of wine and champagne just in case. She then dressed up, a dark green silk dress paired with a matching coat and heeled shoes. She brought a few decorations before carrying all of that, using your clouds. Izuku smiled once he walked into the office with everything, abandoning his work and helped you set up the table.

The two of you enjoyed dinner together, talking about your day, specifically on how Izuku was swamped with back-to-back villain attacks. To the point where he was the same police officer twice in two different scenes. After dinner, the two of you move to the couch, still holding your wine glasses now filled with champagne.

“I have a gift for you,” Izuku mentioned, pushing himself up off the couch before going behind his desk, going through the drawers.

You giggled, shifting around the couch to get a little more comfortable, your jacket long discarded. Izuku hissed out a “here it is!”, before pulling out a neatly wrapped box, closing the drawer with his foot. You took another sip of your bubbly alcohol as Izuku skipped over to you with the box in hand.

“Here you go, darling!”

You smiled, placing your glass on the small lamp table to the right of you before sitting up and taking the box from your husband. He smiled at you as he sat beside you, seeing you begging to open up the carefully placed wrapping paper. Once all the wrapping paper was removed from the box, you gasped, seeing the logo on the box. BVLGARI. A smile slowly appeared on your face as you untied the golden silk ribbon. Slowly lifting the top of the box, you pulled out of the pure white tissue paper. This revealed one of the most beautiful necklaces and earrings you’ve ever seen. It was an emerald necklace, it had two emeralds, and also was decorated with mini diamonds along the border, and considering the brand, you knew it was real. The earrings were dangly and matched the way the smaller emerald looked on the necklace.

“Izuku… it’s beautiful…”

He smiled, taking the box out of your hands before taking the necklace out of the box. He whispered at you to turn around. Following his instructions, you swept your goddess braids to the side as he placed the necklace around your neck, the cool feeling of the metal tingly against your warm skin. Izuku then connected the chain, letting the necklace fall against your nape before leaning over your shoulder and placing a light kiss on top of her almost-bare shoulder. You shuddered, leaning into his touch as his hands moved from your shoulders, trailing down your body to rest them on your hips. You let out a moan, feeling him give your neck a nip, reaching up to grab him by his messy curls. You smirked, before sighing into the neck kisses he was leaving on your neck.

“You smell,” he inhaled slowly, “really fucking good.”

Giggling at his words, you placed your own hands on top of his own before turning around. You lifted yourself off the chair. Izuku lifted an eyebrow as you placed your hands behind your back.

“I have a gift for you too, it’s not a material gift but…” you trialed off as you reached up the straps of your dress, before beginning to slowly pull them down, revealing the thin straps of your expensive lingerie.

Izuku’s eyes sparkled as your dress trailed down your body, revealing the expensive material cut and crafted to fit your body perfectly. The way the emerald green clashed perfectly with your deeper skin. Your manicured hands trailed down your body as your dress pooled at your feet, leaving you in nothing but the sinful lingerie and the heels to match. Izuku licked his bottom lip as you slowly walked over to him, dragging your heels with each step. Lifting yourself, you slowly placed yourself on his lap, feeling Izuku’s hands immediately attach themselves to your hips. He gave you a sly smile, looking up at you.

“And you look so amazing,” he gave your body another glance, making you smirk and lean back, using your arms and hands to steady you.

You smiled, wrapping your arms around his neck before diving into a kiss. His lips tasted of mint and strawberries, it was a new taste but one you didn’t mind. Deepening the kiss, you gasped as you felt Izuku’s hard on all the way through his pants.

“I love you so much, Izuku Midoriya.”

A moment of silence went by.

“I love you too, Y/n Midoriya.”

Izuku took a deep breath and was about to open the next one when his phone, his personal one, started ringing. He reached in the drawer and pulled it out and looked at the screen. Sweetheart was calling, a picture of you and Izuku at your wedding anniversary plastered across the screen. Izuku was less blacked up back then, and you still had a crutch from your physical therapy from your incident. But god did you both look so beautiful and happy. Izuku was wearing his suit from the wedding but without the jacket and a couple of buttons unfastened. You, however, changed out of your wedding dress into a white velvet dress that was strapless and came with these long gloves in the similar fabric that you only wore for official pictures. Izuku was carrying you bridal style along with the rest of you and his family and his closest friends.

Izuku simply smiled sadly, before answering the call.

“Y/n?”

He heard nothing at first, nothing but the phone static so he called out your name again. This time he heard someone take a deep, trembling breath as if they had been crying for a long time.

“Izuku.” Your voice was scratchy, and hoars too. Izuku could feel his heartbreak and drop to his ass all at the same time. He did that.

God he was supposed to be a hero, save people and never let them down.

Now he may have just ruined his marriage.

“Y/n.” He said again, “how- how are you?”

“I’ve called a divorce lawyer.”

Oh. Straight to the bullet.

“We can’t- we can’t talk about this?”

“What’s there to talk about? You did this to me. You did this to us. Now face the fucking consequences of your actions.” Your voice was scratchy, the rasp appearing with each word you say.

“I know what I did.”

“And yet, you still did it.”

Izuku took a deep breath, leaning back into his chair. He looked up at the ceiling of his office, looking at the dazzling, overhanging chandelier in the middle of it.

“So there’s nothing I can say or do to convince you to stay?”

“You can have the house, as long as you pay me alimony for the next two-three years, for a reasonable price of course.”

You completely ignored his question, going straight into what was going to happen next. Izuku took another deep breath, this time leaning against his hand as he placed his elbow, pointed up, against his desk.

“So this is it?”

“This is it, Izuku. I told myself I would never lessen myself for a man, and I already broke that when I quit my job. I’m not gonna keep doing that to myself.”

“I-I love you.”

You gave off an airy chuckle as if you couldn't believe the words coming out of his mouth. And with that you ended the call, those being one of the last words you’ll be saying to him until the meetings between the two of you and your divorce lawyers.

---

“Y/n?” A muffled voice called out, pulling you out of your sleep along with knocks on your door

You pushed yourself off the bed, throwing the hotel blankets off your body. It was late at night, you went back home after your impromptu visit with your mother. You packed up what you could in one go before stuffing it in your car. You couldn’t see Izuku after that, so you tried your best to remove any trace of yourself from that house. You were just about to fall asleep, the tv playing a random 90s show for background noise. Digging through one of your suitcases, you found a robe to wrap around your body before moving towards the door.

You summoned lightning in one hand as you checked who was at the door. Seeing red-and-white hair, along with a bright blue eye and a dull grey eye, you took a deep sigh of relief before slowly opening the door. Standing there, wearing a raincoat and holding a closed umbrella was Shoto Todoroki. His hair that grew since high school was pulled back in a ponytail as he looked down upon with concerned eyes.

“Y/n…”

You took a deep breath, closing your eyes as he said your name. You then opened them back up before giving him a sad smile.

“Shoto… can I help you?” You leaned against the doorway, placing a hand in your waist.

“I heard from Izuku, the two of you are getting a divorce?”

You leaned into the hallway, looking to see if anyone saw him before pulling him into your hotel room. You closed the door and locked it behind you immediately before turning on the light. Shoto looked around the luxury rented room, seeing all of your suitcases and other items stacked up against a wall. Feeling your hands tremble, you sat on your bed, folding your hands underneath themselves.

“How did-“ your voice came out raspy and dry, so you cleared your throat before speaking again.

“How did you find me? I didn’t tell anyone where I was.”

Shoto simply smiled, “being the #3 hero has its perks. I figured you didn’t want a lot of people crowding around you so I said I’d talk to you.”

Hearing that, you lifted your head swiftly, “people already know about the divorce?”

Shot shrugged off his raincoat, revealing the long sleeve black turtleneck he was wearing. He placed his umbrella in a random corner before going to sit beside you on the bed.

“After what happened this morning, Izuku only told us that you’re leaving him… and wouldn’t tell us why. We called everyone, Uraraka, Iida, Kirishima, we even called his mom and All Might… all he said was that his marriage was over. No reason as to why…”

You let out a slight chuckle, your shoulders jumping slightly at the irony of the situation.

“So the only person you could come to was me, right?”

Shoto simply nodded his head, shifting his body closer to you.

“Y/n… I know you… you aren’t this rash person. You wouldn’t come to this decision on a whim. I thought you and Izuku were okay?”

Taking a deep breath, you spoke, “I thought we were okay too… Shoto I… he…”

Your body shuddered and shook as sobs flew out of your mouth. As tears fell, you covered your face and turned away from Shoto, hunching over yourself. That’s when you feel hands, one warm and the other cold, pull at you, grabbing at your waist before pulling you into a warm body. Shoto’s comforting hands and his placing you on the fireside of his body allowed him to let it all out once again. He didn’t say a word, only letting out soft shushes in your ear as you continued to cry.

You could hear nothing else other than the air conditioning and your cries echo throughout your room. It felt like an eternity before you slowly started to quiet down. Taking a deep breath, you slowly pushed yourself out of Shoto’s hold before getting up to get a water bottle. Shoto, his eyes still shining with concern, said nothing as you twisted the cap open and drank half the bottle.

As the pudding of your head slowly went away, you placed the bottle on the desk before sitting back on the bed.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to cry my eyes out all over you,” you apologized, grabbing one of the pillows to hold closer to your body.

Shoto shook his head, waving off your concerns, “it’s okay, it’s black anyways.”

You just nodded your head and looked away.

“Are you gonna tell me what’s wrong? Why are you and Izuku getting a divorce?”

You took a deep breath, your mind racing with everything you’ve been through… the day you met Izuku, the day you asked him out for the first time, the day he asked to be your girlfriend, the day he proposed… the day you two got married… everything.

“Izuku… he cheated on me…”

It was silent after that, the buzz of the air conditioning and the beeps of the cars below the two of you filling the tense air.

“He… he what?”

You bit your bottom lip as you spoke again, “he cheated on me, with Mellissa, you remember her right? Melissa Shield? All Might’s “niece”?”

Shoto nodded his head, shifting his body to face forward as he leaned forward, using his hands to steady himself. He lifted his head to the ceiling as he fully processed your words.

“Oh… oh wow… I never thought that he would do that.”

You scoffed, flopping back into the bed, “well me neither, and yet… here we are.”

You started to laugh, laugh at this situation, laugh at here you are now. God, everything was so fucked, wasn’t it? Feeling the bed shift, you could feel Shoto lay down on the bed beside you. He wrapped his arms around you before pulling you into him once again, this time leaving you on his right side so you could cool down. The feeling left sighing, leaning into his touch even more.

“Izuku is an absolute idiot, and I’m glad that you’re leaving him at the first sight of disrespect.”

Coming from Todoroki and his background, those meant a lot to you. You smiled before lifting your head to look at him.

“Thanks, Shoto, that means a lot.”

He smiled, before slowly removing his hands from your waist.

“I should let you sleep, I just wanted to come to check up on you.” He bent over to grab at his umbrella before turning around to grab his raincoat.

Sniffling, you nodded your head, wiping away your tears before getting up to see him off, “thanks for coming to check up on me… even though the way you found me was a little creepy.”

—-

You officially divorced three months after that day, Izuku tried to hold out as long as he could but soon enough even the number one hero couldn't hold out that long. The number of times you had to tell him you weren't going to come back to him was astounding, his stubbornness knew no bounds. You allowed Izuku to keep the house and he was to pay you a hefty amount of alimony along with the money he was to pay you for spousal distress.

When news came out that the number one hero and his wife would be divorcing, the media went into a frenzy. Even bigger than the one about your wedding. You had to rely on your family to help you out until the news and paparazzi left you alone. It was even worse on Deku, being the top hero and not even able to save his marriage? Talk about a blow to his reputation, it almost cost him the #1 spot. If it wasn't for the Incident at the Kasona Mall, where a villain decided to blow up a mall, where he saved over 50 people in one swoop, Bakugo would have finally been able to claim that #1 spot.

Speaking of pro-heroes.

H/n is back on the scene! Officially signing with The Todoroki Agency!!

You were a pro-hero again, stepping back into the spotlight after over six years. After not much deliberation, and encouragement from friends alike, you decided to come out of retirement once more. You had to retake the licensing process and test of course, but you passed with ease. Being a hero was almost like riding a bike, it was ingrained within you. After The Hero Commission reinstated you, you got so many offers. From Fatgum to LeMillion, and Gang Orca. However, you already promised a certain person that you would join up with him.

“You sure you want me Shoto?” You were sitting in his penthouse, visiting him after he got hurt in the Incident at Kasona mall.

The two of you had gotten closer ever since that day he found you in your hotel room. He helped you get back on your feet, helped you pick out a new house to live in, (since you left the house to Izuku), and helped you study to retake the test. He nodded, shifting his position on his couch. The movement however, caused him to wince as he had to move his arm, which slung into a cast. You immediately got up and helped him move into a more comfortable position without straining himself. He thanked you for the help as you sat back down, grabbing your glass of wine.

“Yeah, you were an amazing hero when you were active years ago. I know this is a decision I’ll lose no sleep over.”

You chuckled, sipping on the wine he put out for the two of you. He smiled softly at you, his intense stare causing your body to heat up slightly, or that could be from the alcohol, you honestly didn't know. You licked your lips, shifting your legs to help lessen that heated throb between your thighs.

“Alright, I guess I’m joining your agency.”

You grew out of your old outfit, so with the help of Hatsume and other designers, you got a whole new outfit. Instead of the original leotard/bodysuit you had when you were younger, along with the thigh boots, it all connected into all one large jumpsuit. It was black with purple accents adorning all across the outfit along with a brand new cape. You turned around, summoning clouds to lift you as you twirled around. Hatsume, the designer who made your new hero costume, Hokkaido, and Mina, who you also told about the true reason you and Izuku got divorced, all smiled as you felt out your new outfit.

“Well?” Mina asked, smiling as you landed on your feet.

You turned around, trailing your hands down your body, feeling the aft fabric and metal accents clash together on your body before smiling at yourself in the mirror.

“I love it.”

Your office was on the same floor as Shoto’s, him constantly relying on your knowledge and wisdom on other matters. The two of you were the leaders in the recent missions the two of you had taken together. This whole process was a lot like riding a bike, coming back easily. You had missed this, you had missed this so much, and you could tell the world and missed you too.

The media accepted your return with open arms, jumping right back to the top 20s. You were a very powerful hero after all.

After three months of coming back, making it six months since your divorce, your parents decided to throw a party for you. To celebrate you coming back, and ranking high on the Billboard Chart in so little time. You tried to get yourself out of it but they took no excuses. So you decided to make the most of it, you felt like a whole new woman. Placing your braids in a bun, you wore a strapless black velvet dress with matching long-sleeved gloves. You slipped on some ankle-strap, black stilettos, and pearl jewelry set to complete the look. The party was small but it was filled with life, all of your old classmates and even your old co-workers from your old agency even came. Mina, Jirou, Tsu, and even Yaomomo, as busy as she is, came. Kirishima even got Bakugou to come. Everyone was so excited to see you come out of retirement and take to the streets again. Some did try to pry into your broken relationship with Izuku, but you just ignored them and told them to enjoy themselves at the party.

“Y/n.”

You turned around to see Shoto standing there with two champagne flutes in his hands. You smiled and walked up to him, hands extended out for a hug. He wrapped his arms around the best he could with the two drinks in his hands. You giggled at his struggle as he tried to step back without spilling the drinks.

“I see your hands are full, Boss.” You winked as you took one of the flutes of champagne out of his hands.

He just chuckled as you guys cheered, clinking your glasses together before taking a sip. As the sweet liquid hit your tongue, your eyes trailed down his body at the suit he was wearing. All black suit with the jacket, with a white dress shirt, red tie and tailored to perfection. You licked your lips as he breathed in, seeing his chest press up against the white fabric. Clearing your throat, you pulled your eyes away from his chest as you looked up at him finishing his drink. You smiled at him and he returned it as he placed the glasses on an empty table.

“You seem so much happier.” You heard Shoto comment behind you.

You turned to face him and couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow.

“What do you mean?”

Shoto walked up to you, the proximity between you two making your heart pound this a little faster. He leaned down, using his right hand to make you look in his eyes.

“When you first announced your retirement, and when I saw you after that… I do not doubt that you were happy but…” he trailed, his grip on your chin tightening slightly.

“But… but what?” You let out a whisper, feeling his thumb softly move against your skin.

“There was still this sadness in your eyes, that I could never pinpoint but now… I can’t see it at all.” He let go of you after that, taking a couple of steps back.

You took another deep breath, pressing a hand against your chest to feel your beating heart.

Smiling at Shoto, “thank you, that means a lot.”

The two of you continued to drink together, whether it be champagne or something stronger. The more the drinks came around you two, the two of you drank, and the more you two drank, the more handsy the two of you got. Shoto’s arms never left your waist and would find themselves trailing lower and lower down your body. You would find ways and excuses to slowly caress his face or his chest. The two of you would just get closer and closer. Luckily, most everyone around was drunk so even if they did notice, it was unlikely that they would notice. Soon enough, people began to leave, wishing you the best of luck and congratulations.

Then it was just the two of you. Shoto, despite being as drunk as you are, helped carry you to your bed upstairs. As he laid you in the bed, you reached out to him, pulling him down onto you and your bed. You giggled as he flopped on his back, allowing you to quickly straddle him.

“Y/n,” he giggled, he was more emotional, happy drunk, “Y/n why are you doing?”

You smiled, licking and biting at your lips as your hands trailed down his body. Feeling at his chest, before trailing down his abs, your hands and fingers going ever ripple and ridge on his body before landing right in the top of his pelvic area, feeling his hard-on poke out through his slacks. You hissed slowly as you began to rock into him, your dress riding up with every movement you made. Your movements caused him to whisper curses under his breath, his hips buck as he grabbed onto your waist tightly. You gripped at his shoulders as he guided you up and down his waist, his touch leaving your skin electrified, the opposite temperatures causing trembles throughout your body. You then leaned down to plant light kisses against his neck

“You’re so fucking handsome,” you whispered against his skin, your fingers fumbling with the buttons on his dress shirt.

He just smirked before flipping you on your back, using his knee to spread your legs.

——

It was a week after the party and you had just gotten back from your shift of patrol. It was early in the morning, say almost 4 am, and you were ready to go home and get some sleep. Saying goodbye to your sidekick, you walked towards your office to get some final papers before going home. As you opened the door, you could feel dull light entering your vision. So you turned and followed where it was coming from only to find yourself right outside of Shoto’s door. That’s where you could hear the argument.

“Izuku I—”

“NO— I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU, YOU’RE SLEEPING WITH MY EX-WIFE!”

“I think you’re the last person to be concerned about what she does now!”

“You’re one of my closest friends, I’ve known you the longest! And you just stab me in the back like this!?”

“I think that you should leave Izuku before I make you. What Y/n and I have, it’s none of your business.”

You could hear a slam, and hear something break before hearing heavy stomps echo throughout the room. You hoped it didn’t come to them full-on fighting, you knew Shoto could handle himself against, however, when Izuku was mad, Lord did he get mad. You hope you won't have to face him again, after all this time.

“I don’t want to hear a word you have to say!! I should have known, you’ve ALWAYS been chasing after her! Since our time at U.A!

You tilted your head at that, confused at what he meant. Shoto has been chasing after you since high school? You thought that Shoto always had a thing for Yaomomo, despite her and Jirou getting engaged recently. It was because of that, you believed Shoto had shifted his focus onto you…

“So what? I thought I left her in good hands, out of all my friends, you were the ONLY one that I thought could give her a good life. I thought you could love her and only be with her! Now I see that I couldn’t even trust you with that! So you don’t get to decide how she spends her time and who she spends it with! Not after what you did to her!”

It went quiet after that, but you could still see the heavy breathing out of both of them. You bit your lip, heart pounding as you grasped at the wall, staring to hear to see if they speak under their breath.

“What… what are you talking about?”

“She told me… she told me what you did... How you cheated on her with Melissa. Don’t give me that look, I’m not gonna tell anyone. She asked me not to, it’ll do no one any good if it got all. They’ll just hound her for months for this.”

You could feel your body begin to rock back and forth, you could feel the tension rising all the way from the place where you would stand.

“So I say again, you have no right to have any say about what she does in her own time. Even when she was married to you, she was never yours! She’s her own woman, and after being suffocated by you, she deserves to do whatever she wants. I’ll be here, no matter what, and I’ll stick by her because that’s what people who truly love someone do!”

You couldn’t help but smile at his words, you could feel tears swell in your waterline. Taking a deep breath, you stood up slowly, brushing off any dirt or dust collected on your lap before walking towards the door. You gave a knock on the door, before slowly turning the doorknob to reveal a trashed office. Plants turning upside down, smaller tables flipped around, and books spread all across the floor. Your eyes then landed on the two of them, standing behind the bigger office desk. Izuku was holding Shoto by his shirt, and the two of them had intense looks on their faces. You took another deep breath, seeing the way Izuku looks after so long. He grew out his beard, despite him hating it so much. His already scruffy, curly hair grew even more unruly. His eyes turned towards you, the shock after seeing you so long causing him to lose his grip on Shoto.

“Y/n…”

You closed your eyes and rolled your neck before closing the door behind you.

“Shoto is correct, what I do with my time is absolutely none of your business Izuku. We’re done, we’ve been done for six months. If I’m going, to be honest, we’ve been done for a year… since you had an affair with Melissa for six months as well,” you stated, slowly walking up towards the two of them.

“So what I do with him, what I do with anyone… is no longer your business. Now get out!”

Izuku stood there, shocked at your words, slowly turning his body to face you.

“Y/n I…” You made a motion with your hands, quieting him.

“Izuku Midoriya, get out now!”

He jumped back, before turning back to Shoto, giving him one last glare before walking past you towards the door. You kept your back towards him, and the door as well, as he opened it before walking out, shutting it behind him. With that, you then turned to the last man standing in the room. You gave him a soft smile, slowly shaking your head as you amble across to him. You placed your hands on his biceps as he wrapped his arms around your waist. He smiled down at you, before leaning in for a soft kiss. You chuckled and smiled into the kiss, tightening your grip on his arms. You could feel the grip you had on you tighten with every second of the kiss. Once you let go, you slowly reached up to caress the side of his face with the scar with your hand.

“You look stressed… is it because of your day? Or because of the walking trash that just walked out?”

He chuckled softly at your words, shaking his head. You smiled as you walked towards his desk, moving some of the papers off before sitting on top of his desk. Shoto gave you an up and down glance, before walking towards you and standing in between your legs.

“So… why was Izuku here?” You asked him, rubbing at his shoulders and arms.

Shoto took a deep breath before leaning forward and laying his head on top of your shoulders.

“He came up here, accusing me of different things. I never found out he found out that the two of us were seeing each other… I was more focused on other things…”

Izuku was always so stubborn, that could be a good or bad thing depending on who side you were on. You sighed, nodding your head as you wrapped your arms around him.

“Let’s go to your place? I’m really tired and I honestly just want to get as much sleep as I can.”

You could feel Shoto smile into your shoulder, before nodding. You were about to push him off of you, so you could both get what you need and walk out together, a sudden force whooshed you off your feet, arms grabbing at you and carrying you in a bridal position.

“Shoto!” You squealed, holding on to his shoulders.

He just softly chuckled once more, as he carried you out of the office, nothing but smiles on the two of you’s faces.

___

Taglist: @tremendouswolfsaladranch @simi0603 @tanakasprayer @kirishimaisthatbitch @theadorkablezaza @katemocha @pineapplejuic3 @kehlaniwwe @honeylavender13 @p102ab @maybeisthemoon @dark-yuh @introvertatitsfinest @lazymooneye @yzviea @fan-girling-over-everything @@chscklvr @dragonsdreamoffire @superheros-and-others @gabbygibbsgirl

[knivesareout]

take it fast

Pairing: Ed Baldwin x Female!Reader Word Count: 4.9k Summary: It’s not that you didn’t love your husband- you did. It’s just different now. Warnings: Smut. Light infidelity but, not really. A/N: Half based off of this request/the other half is just inspo I pulled while re-watching For All Mankind. I’m super nervous about this but I hope y’all like it!!

—

It wasn’t that you didn’t love your husband anymore, because you did, it was just different now.

You’d grown out of each other- marrying too soon, high school sweethearts and all that, and never really got any other experience but one another. Jack didn’t really want kids so it was just the two of you: moving from Boston to Houston after you graduated college and while he joined the astronaut candidate program, you got a job at the front desk of JSC.

Things were fine at first. The new environment helped and you were both excited to see and do all of the things Houston had to offer but the shininess of a new place dulled quicker than you’d anticipated and once a routine was established, it wasn’t uncommon for his side of the bed to be left cold for a few nights a week.

You wished you could say his infidelity bothered you but it didn’t. He always seemed happier, lighter, after he’d come back and that’s really what mattered. Jack was more of a friend than anything else and that was fine.

There was an agreement made a year into your move, an agreement to quietly separate. While you both continued to live together, he moved his things into the spare bedroom and slowly became a roommate as opposed to your husband. The action of a divorce would cause too much disruption into the life you were both carefully creating- Jack fully graduating the astronaut program and you making friends, settling into your job.

It wasn’t ideal but it worked. For now.

—

While most people hated Mondays, they were actually your favorite and even more after a mission that went smoothly. Apollo 86 had just landed over the weekend and everyone that trickled in through the doors of JSC seemed to be in a good mood, smiling at you as they passed by you at your desk.

You’d been promoted just a few short months ago, working your way up to Assistant to the Director of JSC in your time there. Margo Madison was a tough cookie but your personalities clicked from the moment you’d started working in the building so it was a no brainer when her previous assistant, Emma, needed replacing after moving.

After briefing with Margo, you settle down at your desk and start filing away your leftover paperwork from Friday, wishing you’d finished instead of being in a hurry to leave.

“Mornin’,” Ed mumbles as he passes by you on his way towards his office, coffee in hand and eyes heavy with sleep.

“Oh! Mr. Baldwin, Ms. Madison wanted to talk to you when you got settled in,” you call after him, raising out of your seat to shoot him an apologetic look. You knew Ed hated unexpected meetings, and more so with Margo, as they usually ended in an argument with no solution.

He slowly turns around and sighs, setting his coffee down on your desk, shooting you an expectant look. “Well?”

“She didn’t say much other than to catch you early. Sorry.” You purse your lips with a shrug. “You know she usually doesn’t give me much to go on.”

Ed nods, tapping his fingers along the wood and catching your gaze. “I know. Just thought maybe today might be the day. Tell her I’ll head over in 10. I’ve got a couple calls to make first.”

“You got it.” Glancing down at the coffee, you raise your eyebrows and give him a teasing smile. “Where’s mine?”

The bark of laughter Ed makes rings throughout the room and your stomach flips at the sound- full and hearty. As he catches his breath, the smile that graces his lips makes your heart squeeze and you wonder, not for the first time, how often he smiles like that and for who.

“Next time, alright?”

You nod quickly, “I’m holding you to it, Baldwin.”

He picks up his coffee and starts to walk backwards, pointing a finger at you. “It’s Ed, even at work!”

Once he’s tucked away in his office, you try and catch yourself. Your face hurts from smiling, cheeks strained and your stomach is still in knots. It’s a struggle to calm down but eventually you do, breathing deeply.

There’d always been this thing- with Ed. A spark of some sort that kept you up at times. It’d started just a few years ago after Jack had officially joined the program and you were both suddenly invited to all of the BBQ’s and events that encompassed the astronauts and their families. You and Ed both enjoyed the quiet companionship one another brought when things got too hectic, tucked away in a backyard or a kitchen while the parties continued on. You’d both just drink quietly, offering a small comment or two but in those hushed moments, you got to know Ed better than anyone else in Houston.

A beep of your computer startles you and you chuckle quietly, glad to be knocked out of the silly daydream.

Picking up the phone, you dial into Margo’s office and she answers with a quick, “Did you catch Ed?”

“He’ll be with you in 10,” you tell her, jotting down the meeting in the plans for today.

“Good,” she answers. “And remind me to run something by you later. Before lunch.”

“You got it.”

—

Friday rolls around quicker than you can blink. After the news Margo had given you on Monday it seemed like time wouldn’t slow down as you started to make preparations.

You had started to wonder when you would finally get the all clear to attend a launch. Fly down to Florida and meet the crew, attend schmoozing parties and start networking. While being Margo’s assistant was great, it wasn’t the ultimate goal- not with a degree in mechanical engineering. But with some experience under your belt, it seemed like it was finally time.

Apollo 91 was set to launch next week and you were getting a front row seat.

The office was a flutter as you made sure everything was in place for you and Margo to be gone the next week. Setting up a re-route for all of your calls and messages to come through the offices in Cape Canaveral. Your checklist was long and tedious but needed, not wanting to forget anything and making sure no detail was missed. So, when a cup of coffee is placed on your desk, you jump in your seat, a small shriek escaping your lips.

“Jesus, sweetheart. Gonna break my eardrums if you do that again,” Ed laughs, the noise doing nothing to calm your racing heart.

You try to glare at him but the smile he’s wearing breaks you down and there isn’t much you can do but shake your head, smiling behind your hand.

“It’s been days, Ed,” you point to the coffee, waiting for an explanation.

Ed shrugs sheepishly, “Better now than never? But I can take it back. I’ve been needing a second cup.” He slowly goes to grab the cup but you’re quicker and snatch it back.

“Don’t taunt me like that. I’m desperate for caffeine right now,” you tell him between sips.

His forehead crinkles and he finally takes in the state of your desk. Papers are strewn across what is normally a pristine surface and he crosses his arms over his chest. “Everything alright?”

You nod slowly, taking a deep breath. “Yeah, for the most part. Margo invited me down to the Cape with her for launch week and we leave tomorrow morning. It’s just a lot to try and take care of before then.”

“You’re going down to watch 91?” He seems surprised, happy almost, and you wonder why.

“Yeah. A surprise, I know. But since it’s a longer trip, she said she’d need me down there with her. Why?”

Ed rubs a hand across his jaw, his lips ticking up on the side and he shrugs. “I’ll be there too. Usually don’t go down for these things but since Gordo is headin’ up I thought I’d go and show some moral support.”

“Oh.” You pause, not wanting to make it weird because now your mind is racing, suddenly very aware of the band on his left hand. “That’s really nice of you.”

“Yeah. Well, maybe we’ll run into each other or something. I’ll try not to scare you next time,” he teases and your face heats up and it’s not from the temperature of the coffee you’ve just finished.

“That’d be nice,” you nod, “But please don’t scare me. I don’t think I could handle that embarrassment again.”

“I’ll try my best.” Ed crosses an ‘X’ over his heart and glances down the hall before stepping away from your desk. “I should get goin’ but I’ll see you later?”

“I’m sure you will. Have a good trip,” you tell him earnestly.

“You too.” Ed waves a hand around him before he turns and heads down the hallway, disappearing.

Your heart finally starts to slow a couple minutes later, slumping down into your chair with a huff.

The swift opening of a door breaks the spell and Margo looks at you, head cocked. “You alright there?”

“Yeah, perfectly fine.”

—

The energy at Cape Canaveral was different from Houston.

You couldn’t quite put your finger on why, but it was. You felt like a fish out of water following behind Margo once you’d both checked into your respective hotel rooms and headed towards the main buildings to start prep.

The days were rushed, blending together and while you only saw Ed a few times throughout the first couple of days, it was nice to see a smiling, familiar, face anytime you bumped into each other.

As the week ended and 91 had launched, an after party was being thrown in the ballroom of the hotel you were staying at and as much as you wanted to skip it and relax, Ed had mentioned he was going and looked forward to seeing you there so, back to your room you went in an attempt to freshen up.

It was the first time you felt like you could breathe once you’d locked yourself away in the room, no more work ahead of you. At least not until Monday. You had the party tonight and all day tomorrow to recoup and pack up and then you were headed back home the next day, expecting a slow Sunday to catch up on laundry and maybe have dinner with Jack if he didn’t have plans or someone over.

After a quick change of clothes, from your pants suit to a dress you’d almost not packed, you did a quick touch up of your mascara and headed down.

Margo had already told you she was flying back early, a red eye tonight, so your eyes searched for the only other person you’d know.

Ed wasn’t hard to find.

The tall, broad man stood out in the crowds of people huddled around tables and in groups. His smile was real but the laughs were fake, polite, to the group of three men he was talking to.

You grab a drink on your way over to him, sipping at it quickly and passing by a few people you’d met throughout the week and waving back. Once you successfully reach Ed, and your drink is empty, your stomach slowly starts to twist with nerves. While you’d seen him the last few days, it had only been in passing. Quick hellos and acknowledging nods when you were in the same room.

He’s quick to pull you into his side, squeezing you lightly before pulling away to introduce you to the group of men he’s been talking to. They’re all bigwigs at Kennedy and you fumble at first, not expecting them to want to speak to you but they’re eager to learn about who you are, what you do and what you want to do. You know it’s Ed’s doing with the way he’s smiling in the corner of your eye as you talk to them and you cock your hip against his in a show of thanks.

Eventually they leave, handshakes and promises to talk again soon. You and Ed wave them off with thanks before turning to each other and you’re quick to smack him in the chest.

“Jesus Christ, Ed. Warn a girl, won’t you?”

He catches your hand against his chest and that’s when you notice it.

His wedding band is missing.

Instead, there’s a band of pale skin wrapped around his ring finger on his left hand and suddenly your tongue is heavy in your mouth as he responds. “Didn’t realize what I was doin’ was a bad thing,” he promises, giving your hand a squeeze before letting it go and it falls at your side. “They were nice though, right?”

It’s hard to focus on anything else and when you watch someone walk by with a tray of drinks, you grab two, place your empty glass on the tray, and hand the extra to Ed. “Yeah,” you agree quietly, sipping at your second flute of champagne.

“Everything alright?” His tone is laced with concern and you’re quick to shake your head in protest.

“Yeah, no, everything is fine. Just a little tired is all,” you tell him, polishing off your glass and already on the lookout for another.

You can tell Ed doesn’t quite believe you but you’re thankful he doesn’t bring it up again, instead leading you towards the bar in the back of the room.

It’s a bunch of small talk once you’re both leaned against the bar with another drink in front of you. He asks about your week and you tell him about all of the things you’d seen for the first time and how it only made you want to strive for something better.

You pointedly don’t ask for another drink after you polish off your third. You felt better than before, less nervous, but still were aware of your surroundings and in control. At least you thought you were until you opened your mouth.

“Did something happen?” You can’t help yourself, blurting it out and you hold a hand to your mouth in embarrassment once you realize what you’ve said.

Ed only pauses before he holds his left hand up to the light, rubbing his thumb along the inside of his ring finger. “Yeah uh,” he pauses, like he’s trying to word what he says next carefully and you go to stop him but he stops you first. “We’re separating. I think. It all happened so fast- right before I left but. Yeah. I think that’s what’s gonna happen.”

“God, Ed. I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s not my business and-,” Ed cuts you off, places his hand over yours on the bar and shakes his head.

“Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault and,” he breathes deeply, finishes off his drink. “Honestly? It’s the biggest fucking weight off my shoulders.”

“What?” You’re lost, eyebrows knitted in confusion and Ed just chuckles quietly.

“Because now I don’t have to feel so guilty. And she doesn’t either.”

Your stomach sinks and you repeat yourself, “What?”

Ed’s thumb brushes along the top of your hand, turning it over and traces his fingers along the lines in your palm. It’s surprisingly intimate and your lungs are burning as you hold your breath, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“Come up to my room with me? It’s too loud down here.” He asks quietly, pressing his thumb into your palm and it knocks you out of your stupor, gaze finally meeting Ed’s and you can only nod.

The ride up to his room is quiet, the elevator dings filling the space as you pass the floors on the way up. You stop close to the top and trail behind Ed as he finds his room and you follow behind him, shutting the door and leaning against it for stability.

You’re not sure what to expect by coming up here with him but he starts puttering around the room, kicking his dress shoes off and loosening his tie. Getting comfortable.

His eyes find you pressed against the door and he motions for you to come further into the room, “I ain’t gonna bite ya. Want a drink?”

You nod but have no intention of actually drinking it, just wanting something to do with your hands and you walk further into the room. The curtains are pulled open, a view of the Kennedy Space Center below you, bright in the night sky. The stars are shining and clear and for whatever reason, it gives you a sense of calm. Like things will be okay.

“Here ya go.” Ed presses the glass of dark liquor into your hands and you nod in thanks, moving to lean against the desk that sits against the wall next to the windows.

“What did you mean down there?” You ask, dragging your eyes from your drink to meet his hazel gaze. “About feeling guilty? Did something happen with Karen?”

At this point you don’t care anymore, too curious. It’s safer to ask about Karen than to ask what’s going on with Ed and you’re hoping he’ll elaborate on his end on his own without prompting.

“She ah- she slept with someone else,” he laughs, tossing back his drink and rolling his eyes with a grimace. “I’d known something was off for the last few weeks but she told me last Friday right before my flight here and she said somethin’ about counseling but that’s not really my thing.”

You feel your heart squeeze at his confession and you set your drink on the desk, moving to sit next to him on the bed where he hangs his head low.

“I can’t let her take all the blame though, you know? I’m no saint either. I just ain’t done nothin’ about it. Yet.”

Ed drags his gaze up from his lap, meeting your own and your stomach drops, mouth going dry and you lick at your lips unconsciously. Your body warms as you realize Ed’s eyes are following the movement of your tongue.

“Ed,” you breathe in warning, suddenly aware of how close you are. Arms pressed together, thighs barely a breath apart.

“I’ve dreamt about kissing you for longer than I’d like to admit,” he confesses, his words hanging in the stiff hotel room air. “I told Gordo about it once. He told me to just go for it, said you had some sort of arrangement with Jack but-.”

“We do.” You cut him off, trying to explain. “We’ve had one for a couple of years now. We’re separated in the way that we have separate rooms and he has a girlfriend who’s actually pretty great.”

“Huh.”

Ed seems stumped at that, like he doesn’t know what to say.

Suddenly you feel foolish. Coming up here was a mistake and as you go to rise, Ed’s hand grabs yours.

“Don’t go.”

He looks desperate when you turn around to look at him. Eyes wide, neck strained. Like he’s been holding himself back and when you finally lock eyes, he pulls you into him, slides you between his open thighs and says again, “Don’t go.”

You’re quick to slide into his lap, dress hiked up and thighs wrapping around his waist, pressing into him. Your arms wrap around his neck and pull his head up to meet yours.

Kissing Ed is just how you thought it would be. Passionate and all consuming. His tongue presses deep into your mouth, sweeping in and around your own to coax the quietest of moans from you.

You want more. No, you need more and maybe Ed can sense that because he starts to tug at the zipper to your dress. The material goes slack and falls down your shoulders, exposing your chest to the cool air and Ed tugs it further down, off your arms and down your torso to pool around your belly.

His mouth is a hot press against your skin as he maps out all the newly exposed flesh for him to taste. Your fingers weave through the silky strands of Ed’s hair, tugging as his mouth sucks a hickey into the top of your breast.

It’s more passion than you’ve felt in years and your whole body is aching. Crotch damp against the heft of Ed, hard and swelling in his dress pants.

You have to stop him. As much as you love the way he’s taking his time, you need to speed things up, need him buried deep inside of you and you tug his mouth away from your skin before sliding off of his lap to stand between his thighs again.

The rest of your dress falls at your feet and you kick the material away, leaving you in your bra and underwear.

It feels like tit for tat once Ed starts undoing the buttons to his dress shirt, tossing it in the direction of where your dress had landed and so you reach back and undo the clasp to your bra, nipples hardening as they meet the air. His pants and boxers are next, his cock lying thick between his strong thighs and you feel yourself clench, bending down to slide your underwear off toe them off.

You thought you’d feel exposed but instead you feel a confidence rising through you that you’d never felt before because standing here, in front of Ed like this, makes you feel empowered. He looks like a man starved as he takes you in, hands reaching for your hips to pull you closer.

“You’re so fuckin’ beautiful,” he whispers against the skin of your belly, raises his head between your breasts and you just grin.

“You’re not too bad yourself there, Admiral,” you tease, pushing his hair back.

He picks you up then, tosses you onto the bed and positions himself on top of you.

Ed is just so broad and while it had always been apparent, it’s different with him looming over you like this, cheshire grin and sparkling eyes full of need.

He’s ravenous in the way he consumes you, mouth unrelenting as he maps out your body. Hands and tongue working in tandem to make sure they don’t miss anything, your body arching into the press and pull as he works you over.

It’s as he nips at your hip and presses your thighs apart that you finally feel a bit of nerves coursing through you.

It wasn’t common to find a man between your legs. Ever. Jack had done it once, in college, said he didn’t much care for it and that was that. He didn’t expect the same from you so it wasn’t really an issue but with Ed’s blonde hair peeking between your open thighs, his tongue darting out to taste you, you wonder why it had never become a problem because shit it was good.

Ed eats you out like a man starved, tongue lapping and sucking. He uses his fingers to pull you apart, give him more room to work and as his mouth latches on to your clit, you cry out, back arching and pressing into his open mouth for more.

“Shit, Ed,” you breathe out, hands bunching into the comforter below you and you can barely make out him chuckling through the ringing in your ears.

“You taste good,” he comments as he slowly presses two fingers into you, “Could just stay down here all night if ya let me.”

You have to school your breathing as he starts to thrust the two long, thick digits into you and your brain has gone static that you don’t even have a reply other than a moan as he curls them before pulling out and doing it all over again.

It’s torture, the way he’s playing you. Your mouth is open and pressed against the pillow underneath your head, eyes screwed shut. It’s too much and you need more but it’s hard to form words. You’re sure you look a mess, body covered in a light sweat, bottom lip swollen from pulling it behind your teeth too much but Ed seems to think differently when he comes up from between your thighs and presses a kiss to the inside, his fingers stilling.

“Do you realize how fuckin’ sexy you look right now?” He tells you, tone low and he slowly slides his fingers out and waits for you to look at him before pressing them between his lips.

You’re not sure how it’s possible for your body to heat up more than it already has but sure enough, a warmth spreads through you at Ed’s words and you shake your head slowly.

“Stop it,” you tell him weakly, hand unclenching from the comforter to press at his forehead that’s leaned against your thigh.

“You don’t believe me,” he says in surprise, turning his head in disbelief.

Ed crawls up, hovering over you once more and knocks his head with yours. Taking your right hand in his, Ed slides it down his chest to stop at his groin before knocking it against the hard thickness of his cock and groans. “You did this to me. Made me so fuckin’ hard I can’t think straight. And it’s not the first time.”

It’s hard for you to pinpoint what you want to take from that but with him so close, you keep quiet, hand wrapping around the thick of him and sliding down to the tip. He’s wet there, precum oozing steadily and you use it to smooth the way as you pump him in your hand.

“Shit sweetheart, if you keep that up-,” he chokes out, head dropping to your shoulder and you grin, guiding him between your legs.

“Ed?” You ask, hand dropping from his cock to press against his back and he looks up, eyes searching yours.

“Hm?”

“Fuck me,” you breathe. “Please.”

It only takes a few seconds for him to process what you’ve asked him and he’s quick to oblige, positioning himself between your parted thighs and notching the head of his cock against the slick of your pussy.

You both groan in unison as he stretches you open, buries himself to the hilt and you both pause to take in the sensation.

Ed fills you up in all the right places, thick and long and it just feels right. You know he’ll take care of you and that’s the best feeling of it all.

It’s a slow rhythm at first. Ed pulls back only to press in deeper, knocking the breath out of you. Then it’s quick, short thrusts that hit a spot you’ve never felt before, eyes rolling back as you cling to him.

“Fuck you feel so good, so tight,” he hisses and you lift your hips to take him deeper, harder, ankle hooking behind his thigh and you clench.

Ed chokes out, one of his arms giving out and he falls to your chest in surprise at how good that’d felt. You run a hand through his hair, tugging at the root and he snaps out of it, quick to recover. His mouth seeks out your breasts and pulls your nipple into his mouth, hips snapping against yours almost angrily.

Your breaths and quietly slapping of skin fills the air as you fuck, your nails dragging down the expanse of his back, his shoulders. It’s dirty words whispered as he makes you feel so fucking good.

Your body starts to feel tight, wound up and you need more so you tell him as much, “Ed, touch me please,” you cry and he snakes a hand between your bodies and finds your clit, rubs the slick nub in tight circles and it’s over.

Your body arches comically high, pulling him in deeper as you pulse around the swell of his cock. Head pressed back against the softness of the pillow, you whine as you cum, his thumb unrelenting against your clit as your orgasm washes over you.

“That’s it, baby. Cum around my cock. Shit-,” Ed groans, his own orgasm taking over and he pulses long and thick into you and you can feel it. Filling you up in deep pulses.

It’s intoxicating, the way it feels as he slowly pulls out of you. You’re dripping between your thighs and it’s so fucking hot in a way you didn’t expect.

A soft whine passes through your lips once he’s fully out and slides out of the bed and you’re about to protest when you hear the bathroom sink turn on.

Ed is nothing if not a gentleman, and it’s apparent in the way he cleans you up. Careful swipes between your thighs and he parts you slowly to make sure he’s gotten every trace of himself before tossing the washcloth to the floor and sliding back into bed.

You waste no time turning on your side to face him, eyes tracing along his chest, shoulders and neck before moving up to his face and smiling when you find him doing the same.

“Hi,” you whisper, hand sliding up to cup his cheek and he turns his head just enough to press his lips to your palm.

“Hi.”

Ed’s grin is contagious and soon your cheeks hurt from smiling, head turning to move against his chest.

You both giggle as you lie there, settling into a comfortable companionship.

It’s hard to tell where this will go, too many variables existing in both of your lives to be clear on exactly where it can go but you’re happy to be along for the ride so long as Ed keeps smiling at you the way he is now, soft and open, like there’s nothing else in the world he’d rather be looking at.

[lonelyl00n]

Je T'aime | Yandere! Joy

Summary: When your childhood bully won't let go of you.

Warning: manipulation, abuse of power, controlling relationship, jealousy, mention of killing

wc: 1.5K

This is was inspired by my favorite song Je T'aime by Hey. When I found out that Joy did a cover of that song, I got the creativity to create this. I wanted to get all of this out of my head, so it may feel a bit rushed in some areas.

You were in the library when you felt someone put their hands over your eyes. “Guess Who?”

“Hmmm.” You joked as you tapped your finger on your chin. “Is it…Namjoon?”

Your eyes were uncovered the second you said that. You laughed at Joy’s angry expression. “I told you not to mention him.”

“Sorry, sorry. What brings you here.”

“What do you mean what brings me here? It’s our night out.” Joy gasps.

“I’m sorry Joy, I don’t think I can do it tonight. Namjoon was supposed to be tutoring me, but I’ve been waiting for like thirty minutes.”

“I’m one of the smartest kids in the school. I’m in the Top 10 you know. Why didn’t you ask me?” Joy pouted.

You laughed at her outburst. “First of all, your parents would sue the school if you weren’t in Top 10, so that doesn’t really mean much.”

Joy's father was the CEO of a famous luxury brand, while her mom is a retired actress who was popular in the late 80's and 90's. Her parents had more money than you and your family could ever dream of. Growing up bouncing around from different relative’s basements made a lot of the kids at school growing up, make fun of you.

Especially Joy.

In 4th grade, is when she would begin to make your life a living hell. She would steal your lunch money and give you foods that she knew you were allergic to. She would constantly call you fat and make rude comments about you to her friends.

It got worse in 10th grade, when she made an announcement over the PA system that whoever talked, touched, or even looked at you would get beat up. She bought you and her matching rings at cost more than $1000, and would make you wear it all the time. She bought you clothes, gave you money, and even managed to convince her parents to buy your family an apartment with three bedrooms and a balcony.

 She basically owned you. You weren’t allowed to go out on the weekends because of her security guards guarding your apartment door. When you did try to leave the apartment, which you never succeeded, you would be taken by the guards to the Park Mansion and have to sit on Joy’s lap as you two watched a movie, as punishment.

You hated the power she had, you always did, she even forced you to go to the same college that she was going to, by threatening to hurt your Aunt Irene.

You reluctantly agreed to her ‘idea’, not wanting to hurt your family members that helped your family so much.

So now you followed Joy around the campus like a little puppy, while everyone else thought that you guys were just close friends who liked being near each other.

“And second of all.” you continued. “We are supposed to be working on a project together.”

Joy furrowed her eyebrows while thinking. A project? With a boy?! She thought she had already told all of your professors to not give you any partners at all. Especially a boy.

“I know what your thinking.” Y/N claimed, seeing the looked on Joy’s face. “But we went to London for a whole month, and this was a month-long project. I can’t do it alone.”

“Fine, then I’ll help you.” Joy suggested.

“But Namjoon has to get this grade too.”

“Why do you worry about other people so much, come on let’s just start this.”

You and Joy spent all night, researching, printing, and decorating your poster board. By the time you guys were finished it was 2 a.m.

“Well, that was quicker than I expected. I guess I’ll have to make a new reservation for tomorrow.” Joy sighed. “Let’s go home.” She said as she intertwined your hands and walke out the library.

As part of the deal, Joy had you move into a luxury 2-bedroom apartment that was about an hour away from campus. Joy demanded insisted that you shouldn’t use public transportation anymore because now, with the help of her money, you were worth a lot. Throughout your high school experience, Joy never let you get a driver’s license, so she has the pleasure of driving you to and from campus, always knowing your whereabouts.

You looked out the car window without having anything to do. As punishment for talking to a boy, Joy had taken your phone claiming that the only person you needed to talk to was always right beside you. “What do you want to eat.” She asked you.

“McDonald’s.” You say robotically. McDonald’s was the only fast food place that Joy allowed you to eat. It was the place she found your family at in 10th grade.

It was on a rainy day that your Aunt Irene had kicked you, your parents, and your little brother out of her basement for being a burden, which you didn’t understand because just a week ago your Aunt had said you all staying there was the best thing to happen for her since her illness was starting to worsen.

So, with no where to go and barely any money, your parents took you all to McDonald’s to split one box of 20 piece chicken nuggets, and 4 small drinks for each member of the family.

As you were told by Joy, her family's trailer had broken down on the way back home from the airport, so Joy offered to walk to the nearest building while her parents berated the driver. The nearest place just so happened to be the McDonald’s you and your family were at.

You instantly recognized Joy when she walked through the door, just like how Joy instantly recognized you. She sat a table across from the booth your family was at, and pulled out her phone. Gosh, were you so amazed. You had never had a phone before. Your parents only had one that they shared, and you didn’t have friends (because of Joy’s rules) to let you use theirs. Joy smiled at you awe-filled eyes and continued talking on the phone.

You didn’t even realize that you were staring at her until your mom slapped your wrist and told you to stop. When the phone call ended, Joy stood up and walked towards your table. You looked at the ground, afraid that she too would scold you. “Hello L/N’s. I’m Park Sooyoung.” She started. You heard a gasp in front of you and looked at your parents, who were looking at the entrance doors. A tall man wearing a suit, and a woman carrying a Chanel bag. Walked through the door.

Joy looked back and laughed. “Oh, those are my parents.” They came up to your booth, both shoke hands your parents and stood behind Joy. ”We wanted to give your family a place to stay, would you let us.” You mother, being the biggest fan of Joy’s mother growing up instantly nodded, while your father thought about it for a few seconds before evening his Wife’s beautiful smile. A smile he hadn’t seen since their wedding day. He agreed as well.

That night was significant to you because not only did your family get a place to reside, but it was also the first time that Joy was nice to you. Since that day she started treated you better, still not letting you talk to anyone else, but she was nice.

Although Joy would never tell you this, it was that night that she fell in love with you, completely.

After eating. You and Joy got into the bed that you two shared. Yes there were two bedrooms in your apartment, but you couldn’t sleep in a room by yourself.

You had slept in a room with somebody your whole life, it felt uncomfortable. So on the first week of living here, you asked Joy if you could sleep with her, even okay with sleeping on the ground. Joy let you into her bed, and sang you to sleep.

That became your routine every night after that. However tonight was different, you feel asleep the minute you got into bed. Joy snuck out of the bed and turned you alarm off. You didn’t need to go to school tomorrow, you wouldn’t have time anyways. Her makeup crew that were going to come today were rescheduled to come tomorrow. The day she had been waiting for since that night was going to happen.

 All of you and her family members were going to be at that restaurant and would watch as she would get down on one knee, just like in the romance movies, and propose to you. Just thinking about tomorrow made her heart flutter. Yes, she was furious about the change of plans today, but she would never take it out on you. Instead, she took it out on that Namjoon guy behind the library. Ugh! Just thinking about him getting close to you was sickening. She had her men take care of his body for her.

She kissed your cheek and whispers in your ear, “I love you.”

Everything was set in her plan. She loved you, and you…would have no choice but to love her. You were hers after all. Hers to love.

[cupofteaguk]

on the road (to you)

summary: as a young adult, one of the strangest revelations is the discovery that peers of yours from past fragile college years are getting married. so imagine your shock and excitement upon receiving a wedding invitation. there are, however, two problems: (1) you are a poor early-20s recently employed adult just beginning to adjust to your 401k plan, and (2) the only available ride to the wedding comes in the form of Jeon Jungkook—friend of a friend, attendee to that aforementioned wedding, and your old college crush. 

pairing: jungkook x fem!reader

genre: roadtrip au, strangers to lovers au | fluff/angst 

warnings: recreational alcoholic consumption, definitely not an accurate representation of how a road trip might actually be, mentions of anxiety + insecurities, very minor book reference to: The Night Circus, equally minor movie references to: Mission Impossible and The Princess Bride because I have a problem, light makeout sessions, talks of DTR (define the relationship), some angst but this is me so there’s a happy ending. 

word count: 27k 

a/n: a birthday present for the one and only Jeon Jungkook, whom I love and respect so much and only wish the bestest of days for. Partly inspired by Taylor Swift’s song “invisible string” +  a love letter of sorts to my own old high school crush for whom my memory of him helped build Jungkook’s character. This also turned out way longer than I ever wanted it to be lol oops! 

update: i was actually able to do a writer’s audio tag on this fic!!! check it out if you want to hear about the behind the scenes process that went into writing this fic <3 

.

When you land a job in the months following your college graduation, you feel as if you are on top of the world. How could you not? After all, the norm that follows post-college is one of disappointment and constant hunts online to find job openings for any position that could suit your background and previous work experiences. It’s a fear that plagues lots of your friends, both those in college and out. It’s the same paranoia you had in the months leading up to graduation and the few months after graduation—in which your days were measured by the boxes you packed to move out of your tiny college apartment and into an equally tiny new apartment you currently share with an old roommate of yours, as well as the days you spent hunched over your computer and scrolling through job postings. 

You had gone through more than a handful of cover letters, resume submissions, and in person interviews before finally landing the job you currently have and have been working under for a month now. 

Throughout the course of the recent month, you’ve continued to secure certain moments that solidify the confidence that you’re finally becoming an adult. Sure, a barely functioning adult who mostly still uses the microwave to heat up your frozen Mac and Cheese—but an adult nonetheless. From learning how to pay your bills online, to realizing that grocery shopping was something you needed to make a conscious effort to do, along with going to and from your nine to five job with your coffee order in hand. 

All of those things have helped you feel like you were, perhaps, finally getting your life together. 

And then you receive the invitation in the mailbox. 

It happens when you unlock your box on a bright March morning, taking out the usual round of bills and fashion magazines until your fingers lock around an envelope bigger than the normal letter size. It’s much sturdier too. 

You don’t know what to think of the letter, until you bring the damn thing back into your apartment and rip the opening. The mere sight of the content inside makes you feel like the hand of life has just taken your figurine and moved you back a good twenty squares. 

The post in your hand reads: 

WITH GREAT JOY, IRENE AND SEOKJIN REQUEST THE HONOR OF YOUR PRESENCE FOR THEIR WEDDING CELEBRATION ON THE DAY OF MAY 25TH. COCKTAILS, DINNER, AND DANCING TO FOLLOW. 

There’s a date at the bottom of the invitation. As you line the date up with your calendar, you realize that you have a week to RSVP to the event. 

You toss the envelope onto the counter in the kitchen just to glare at the cardstock, maybe to convince yourself this is a dream or at least convince yourself that it’s normal for your friend from college to be getting married even when you have yet to land a successful relationship of your own. 

You aren’t as close with Irene as you used to be, but the memory of your friendship is still at the forefront of your mind. The pair of you met during your final year of university, when you were assigned to work together for one of your many senior projects and immediately clicked. The months you spent in her apartment and vice versa pulling out all-nighters in desperate attempts to finish your project definitely earns you an invitation. At the very least, you are happy to see that Irene: bright and smart and funny, is getting married. 

Not only that, but getting married to Seokjin. He’s a year older than you and Irene, but those two met when he was still enrolled and have been inseparable ever since. You don’t know relationships that well, but you know them enough to recognize that Seokjin and Irene were what everyone called the ‘endgame’. In truth, it was only a matter of time before you were to receive one of these from them. 

But did she really have to one-up you like this? Not that it’s a competition. However, it does leave a funny feeling to see someone the same age as you display a much more put together handle on life. You groan at the thought.

“What’s got your panties in a twist?” Karly asks. 

You turn to your roommate. She’s seated at the kitchen table, books out and everywhere as she looks over at you. Karly: fellow alumni, graduated from her undergrad program early to go straight into pursuing her master’s degree. She’s a busy bee. You wave the envelope. “Irene is getting married.” 

Her eyes widen. “Ah shit, no way?” She takes the paper that you offer to her and looks over the invitation. “Damn, I knew it was only a matter of time before we started getting this stuff, but to actually see it happening…” 

You groan. “I know right!” You take the cardstock back from your friend. “It’s only been six months since we graduated, how could she be getting married already?” 

“Well, Irene did have a job lined up for her right after graduation,” Karly points out thoughtfully. She sees the look of bewilderment you give her. “What? It was on her Instagram.” 

You pout. “Of course Irene would have a job lined up like that.” You run a hand through your hair. “I mean, that’s good for her. Really good, actually…” 

Karly jerks her chin towards the envelope still in your hand. “So, are you planning to go?” 

“I don’t know, do you have plans that day?” You wave the paper. “I’m allowed a plus one.” 

Your roommate cracks a smile. “Are you asking me out? A little forward of you, we’ve been friends for so long…” 

You whine, shaking the paper and little more frantically. “Karly, this is important! I don’t want to go alone, I won’t know anyone!” 

She laughs. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. What was the date again?” 

You provide the date to her. You approach Karly’s place at the kitchen table and watch as she opens the calendar on her laptop. Immediately, you are overwhelmed by all the deadlines she’s got under practicality every date on the screen. Yet, a “wow” is the only thing you can say at the sight. 

Karly smiles, sparing you a glance over her shoulder. “One of the joys of being a grad student slash T.A. slash research assistant.” She scrolls down into May, and narrows her eyes upon May 25th. Underneath the date is an event—color coated to bright orange and typed out in all caps. CONFERENCE WITH PROFESSOR WONG. “Oh crap, I have a conference that day.” 

“No…” You whine some more, trailing off as you grab Karly by the shoulders and begin shaking. “Karly! You’ve left me out for the bears! What am I supposed to do?” 

Karly laughs as she lets herself be manhandled in this way. “I don’t know! Go and deepen your social life or something.” 

You stop shaking her and glare instead. “Is that a joke?” 

“What do you expect me to say?” She retorts, appalled by your answer. “Then don’t go.” 

You whine again. “But this is Irene, and I’ll feel bad for not going and congratulating her!” 

“Then go!” 

“But I don’t have a plus one!” 

Karly places her hands at her temples. “Oh my god, this is like the circle of stupidity with you. Then find a plus one! Or just don’t go!” She whirls around to face you. “I will help you find a dress if you decide to go. I will also sit with you on the couch and eat popcorn with you if you decide not to go.” 

You continue to pout, knowing that you deserve that gentle attempt at a lecture but still not liking the reason why you needed such a talking to. 

“Fine,” You eventually decide to say, sliding into the seat next to Karly and leaning forward to plant your entire upper body on the table. 

Karly laughs at your defeated posture. “Well, you have the rest of the week to make your decision.” 

She has a point. That doesn’t mean you have to like it. 

.

For the rest of the week the decision of whether or not you should attend the wedding becomes a weight in your mind. You spend the next few days pondering it, thinking over the pros and the cons. 

As overdramatic as it is, you think about it during work, when you’re partaking in your home workout routines, and even when you’re about to fall asleep. You do want to go, you really do. It’ll be the first time you attend a wedding that didn’t involve a relative, which feels like a big deal in your adult agenda mindset. And Irene is someone you wouldn’t mind spending an evening with to catch up. 

However, you wouldn’t get to spend the evening with Irene—after all, a wedding implies that she would likely be mingling with all of her guests and you would just be another attendee forced to find other means of entertainment. That’s where the plus one comes in handy. Except you don’t have a plus one. A slight problem. 

You sigh. Work is a little slow today, as you are also experiencing the afternoon slump in which your mind drifts away more often than usual. You find yourself with a small laundry list of tasks (such as emailing companies, working on drafts for releases, and trying to set up different appointments) but without the motivation to do those things right away. Because of that, your afternoon slump takes the form of opening airline services to find information and prices about flying to Irene’s wedding. It’s in her hometown, about a five hour flight time from here to there. 

You click on the various boxes that require information, finally allowing a search. As the search goes through, your eyes take in all the prices—both the amount to get there and to get back—and your lips part slightly at the totaling numbers. 

“Five hundred dollars?” You mutter to yourself. You’re not sure how this would work with budgeting, but you’re still trying to figure out how to balance the cost of AC, the internet, and how to eat appropriate meals at least once a day. You don’t have five hundred dollars to spend on an airplane ticket. A slightly bigger problem. 

You sigh again, resting your elbow on the desk and your chin in the palm as your eyes continue to scroll through the website. 

Behind you, fingers curl around the top of your cubicle. There is a silence between the two of you: him, merely observing, and you, completely oblivious, until he clears his throat. 

You jump, having not expected to be interrupted like this. A squeak leaves the back of your throat as you whirl around to see who is visiting you. “Jimin!” You exclaim, taking in the boy now perched along the wall of your cubicle. This is before you narrow your eyes. “Asshole, you scared me!” 

If you just started working here and learned that you’d be cursing out Park Jimin for startling you, that past version of yourself might have turned red, shocked, and nervous at the thought. A month ago, Jimin was that coworker—as friendly as friendly people come by. With his pretty eyes, perfectly soft pink lips, and freshly dyed brown hair, you had been immediately taken by his charm and helpful nature. 

Then the month went by, and you realized there were no romantic intentions on either end. Jimin then became your first friend in your new job. Albeit, he’s a nosy friend who enjoys asking questions and dragging you out to nearby bars and coming over occasionally with take-out, but a friend nonetheless. 

“Sorry!” Jimin says back, then he glares at you. “What are you doing over here anyways?” 

You shake your head. “What do you mean?” 

“What do you mean what do I mean? You’ve been sighing all afternoon.” Jimin pulls out a slip of paper from behind his back. “Fifty times in the last hour, I swear to god.” 

You straighten out of your seat to get a better look at the paper, unamused to find fifty tally marks across the surface. “You’re lying, there’s no way that I sighed fifty times in an hour.” 

“Of course you wouldn’t know, you’re the one doing all the sighing!” Jimin retorts, lowering his hand with the paper. “Is something up with you? Did something happen?” His eyes flicker to the monitor screen behind you and he frowns. “What the fuck? Are you moving away already?” 

You blink. “What?” 

He jerks his chin towards the computer. “You’re looking at flight prices.” 

“Huh?” You turn around, having completely forgotten about your previous predicament in light of discovering that Jimin counts your sighs. “Oh! No…” 

Jimin raises an eyebrow. “No, you’re not looking at flight prices?” 

You slide back into your chair, a silent invitation for Jimin to step further into your cubicle. You sigh again, and he holds the paper back up. Taking a pencil out of his pocket, he makes another mark. You look over at him upon hearing the pencil scratch and scowl. “Give me that!” You grab the paper from his hand. “I’m dealing with a crisis right now, don’t count my sighs!”

“Alright! Alright!” Jimin slides behind you and leans forward to get a better look at your computer screen. “So where are you moving to this time?” 

You press your lips together. “I’m not moving away. A friend of mine from college is getting married. I’m just trying to see how expensive it would be to fly over there.” 

He whistles at the five hundred dollar price in your cart. “That’s pretty expensive.” 

“I know!” You groan, throwing yourself further back into your chair. “I wouldn’t mind going, but I don’t have a plus one. And as you can see, flying there would be a challenge on my wallet.” 

Jimin hums at that. “Well, regarding your plus one problem, I wouldn’t mind going with you.” 

You turn to look at him. “Really? You’d go across the country and endure an entire evening with your coworker and her old college classmates?” 

He shrugs. “If you’re desperate, I’ll keep my offer around.” He actually pouts this time. “Are you implying that you see me more as a coworker than a friend? After all the times we’ve hung out outside of work!” 

Your eyes widen slightly, having not thought of that. “No, no, Jimin, I mean—yes, I do see you as a friend now but we met as coworkers so I just think of you as a coworker first—!” You’re rambling. 

Jimin interrupts by patting your shoulder, the corner of his lips quirked up into a smile. “I’m just messing with you.” 

You shake your head again. “Asshole,” You grumble, returning your attention back to your computer. 

Jimin is still mid-laughter behind you. “Anyways, yeah, like I said. If you’re desperate to go, I wouldn’t mind going with you. But deciding how to get there is a different question entirely.” 

You turn to glare at your friend for a moment. “I’ll let you know.” 

He nods, before his lips part and he’s snapping his fingers. “Oh yeah! I wanted to ask you something.” 

He backs up, allowing you enough space to turn around fully and face him. “Okay, what’s up?” 

Jimin grins, lifting his leg up to nudge your chair slightly. “I’m going out tonight—you should come with.” 

You don’t even give this a second thought. Your lips turn into a downwards curl as you shake your head. “Nope.” 

Jimin looks appalled. “Why not? Didn’t you have fun the last time we went out?” 

“If ‘fun’ to you is trying to drag your drunk ass home and staying the night to make sure you wouldn’t choke on your vomit…” You grumble, trying not to shudder at the memory. It has only been a few days since that ‘fun’ time. 

“I told you that sometimes I overestimate my abilities, and I already apologized for that,” Jimin points out, although he does have the decency to look guilty for that mess. He perks up again. “But this’ll be different, I promise. I’m meeting up with some friends and we’re just gonna catch up. It’s at one of the quieter bars uptown: no loud DJ, no bright lights, no bottomless rum and coke. Promise. It’ll just be a lot of socializing.” He watches you hesitantly. Socializing has never been your strong suit. “And finger food.” 

The mention of food does make you look up towards him—your first sign of interest towards something. However, another thought weighs you down. “Are you sure you even want me to go?” You ask after a moment. “I mean, this is a catch up with friends. Wouldn’t I be intruding?” 

“Not at all!” Jimin brushes off, waving away your concern with his hand. “I told you, it’s a socializing thing. Besides, my friends are always bringing someone along. They were asking me when I’d have a friend tag along, so I thought you’d be a good selection.” He notices you still frowning. “C’mon! It’ll be fun. When I’m not vomiting over your shoes, I’m good company. And I promise I won’t be vomiting this time.” 

You stare at Jimin for a moment longer, contemplating his words. This is very true. Jimin is an ideal friend to have during social gatherings—he’s good at keeping a conversation going so you don’t have to shoulder the weight alone, he’s good at reading when you’re in a good mood and when you’re ready to go home, and he’s excellent at keeping unwanted attention away. You know this. Jimin knows that you know this. 

It takes one curl of your lips for Jimin to grin, knowing that he has convinced you. “Okay!” He says, finalizing the decision without having to hear the actual answer from you. He pats your knee. “We’ll take the subway after work, it’s just a few stops down.” 

If your mind conjures up any second thoughts, Jimin leaves before you are able to express them. 

.

True to Jimin’s word, the pair of you step into a subway heading westbound as soon as you’re finished with work. It’s much later in the day now, the afternoon sun has changed into a night sky with a chill spring breeze to match. The carts are filled with the evening crowd of adults, all done with another day of work and finding enjoyment for the rest of today by returning home or seeing friends. It’s a rarity that you would fall under that latter category, but the thought makes you excited nonetheless. 

“Alright, so you wanna tell me a little bit about these friends that I’m seeing tonight?” You ask, gripping the handlebar above you but leaning towards Jimin so he can hear what you’re saying over the noise of the subway speeding down the tracks. 

Jimin grins. “They’re just some friends I grew up with. We like to get together once a month to catch up and hang out, since everyone is so busy with their own lives.” 

You smile back. “That’s actually really sweet of you guys, to plan hangouts once a month.” 

He lightly flicks your forehead. “Hey, are you saying I’m normally not very sweet?” 

“Well, not right now!” You protest, hand over your forehead. “That hurt.” 

“You’re being a baby!” Jimin retorts back. 

The pair of you continue to bicker like this until your stop is announced over the intercom. Jimin halts the further insults being thrown at each other as he gestures towards the approaching station, as seen through the window of the subway. 

“This is our stop,” Jimin says to you, allowing you to step out onto the platform first. He joins behind you right after, leading the way as the subway’s three chimes signal the closing of the doors. There’s a breeze that follows, running through your hair and clothes as the subway zooms away to its next stop. The station itself is crowded, filled with groups of friends and individuals carrying on with the rest of their evening, overall looking so lively and you can feel yourself feeding off their energy. 

With a gesture pointing up the stairs that’ll take the pair of you to ground level, Jimin leads the way. You make your way through people, following Jimin’s guide until you’re both exiting the station and entering the world of your new stop. It’s another area of the city you work in, so the change in scenery isn’t too dramatic—but it’s a place more catered towards restaurants, shopping areas, and hang-out sections. The bright neon signs protrude out from the building, flashing the various products or services the specific building offered: from manicure care to corner ramen shops. 

“C’mon, let’s hurry!” Jimin calls back to you, picking his pace up slightly. He’s not running, but his long legs make it harder for you to keep up. “Everyone is already there.” 

The pair of you continue to pace down the sidewalk, past the crowds of people waiting to eat, people lingering outside of clothing stores. Finally, Jimin slows down near a restaurant. He looks over his shoulder to make sure you’re still behind him, before entering the establishment. He mentions something about knowing where their seats are, before continuing deeper into the restaurant. 

As you look around, the place does look like a restaurant slash bar—not as crazy as some of the bars Jimin takes you with the intention of actually getting drunk, but there’s still a bar here and there’s still alcohol being shared heavily. It’s the same demographic of early 20s, young adults with friends, but there are actual tables and chairs and booths set up like a restaurant. So you suppose Jimin hadn’t been lying to you about this. 

“There they are!” Jimin says to you, as you look up and follow Jimin’s finger to the table in the far corner that is completely filled with the exception of two seats. You vaguely make out the back of some heads, most belonging to boys, before your eyes land on one of the boys facing you and Jimin. He’s sitting at the far end of the table, currently laughing brightly at something one of the boys at the table has said. For all intents and purposes, the boy is cute. Extremely cute. When he laughs, his eyes and nose crinkle and his lips spread into a wild smile—and brings out the dimple on his cheek. He looks like the embodiment of all your ideal types mashed into a singular being. 

All of those things. Yet, that is not the reason why you are staring. None of those things come close to why you stop dead in your tracks, why your heart drops in your chest, why your eyes widen. Even with the shitty lighting in this restaurant, you are one hundred percent positive. “Jimin!” You manage to choke out, having enough well power to grab onto his hand seconds before he is able to make himself and yourself known to his friends. 

He whirls around, wide-eyed and curious and worried. “What? Is everything okay?” 

You shake your head. The room feels too small. “I think there’s something I should tell you—!” 

“Hey, is that Jimin? Jimin!” Your voice is very easily drowned out by the sound of another, much louder voice that seems to boom through the restaurant. 

Jimin turns back around in time to face one of the boys from the table who has gotten out of his seat. You are able to see him from over Jimin’s shoulder—a tall boy with messy unkempt hair and a boxy smile. Jimin greets him with a “Taehyung!” before the boys embrace. “Taehyungie,” Jimin continues afterwards, turning around so both are able to face you. “This is Y/N, she’s a coworker of mine.” 

Taehyung grins, a friendly gesture that makes you relax. But only slightly. “Y/N! It’s nice to meet you, I’ve heard a bit about you from Jimin. All good things, I promise.” 

“W-Well, that’s good to hear,” You manage shakily, eyes nervously darting to the boy at the end of the table, who has stopped his conversation and is now looking at you and Jimin. 

“Let me introduce you,” Jimin says, breaking your concentration as he rests a hand on your shoulder. He points right at the boy at the end of the table, who is still staring at you. His eyebrows are furrowed together. You want to bury yourself alive. “That one over there is—!” 

A lightbulb seems to go off in the boy’s head. His face breaks out into a smile as he points at you. “Hey, Y/N!” 

Jimin looks taken aback at the fact you are being recognized by someone at the table. His hand lowers as he looks over at you. 

You, however, cannot focus on Jimin. You can only focus on the boy at the end of the table, the boy currently smiling over at you with all the light in his eyes, the boy who makes the memories flash through your mind. From that, the best you can manage is a tiny smile. “Jungkook!” 

Jungkook. Jeon Jungkook. Where do you even begin with him? 

You met Jungkook during your second year of university. He had been an arts major (you were not) and yet, your paths crossed multiple times throughout the quarter as a result of sharing many general education classes together. You even were forced to pair up on a project for one of those aforementioned G.E. classes. Neither of you ran in the same social circle, but that didn’t change how sweet, funny, charming, endearing, easy-going, friendly, smart, and nice Jungkook was. It was very easy for him to make friends, very easy for him to go out of his way to say hi to you in the library or in class or in the cafeteria, and very easy for him to strike up a basic conversation with you. 

Because of that, it was very easy for you to fall for him—to develop a deep-rooted crush that went on for the rest of your university experience. You would use the term ‘friends’ very loosely when describing what your relationship with Jungkook had been. You had never hung out with him outside the context of school, never went out to eat with him, and never saw him again after graduation. Until now. 

Actually, ‘acquaintances’ would probably be a much more fitting term. 

“Hey, I haven’t seen you since graduation!” Jungkook is saying as he stands up from his chair and approaches you. As if on autopilot, you return the one armed hug he gives you. His smile, while still pleasant, holds a surprising tinge of shyness to it. 

“Woah, hold on a second,” Jimin interrupts, immediately pointing between Jungkook and you. “You guys know each other?” 

“Y/N and I went to university together!” Jungkook provides. 

Jimin looks like his eyes are about to fall out of his sockets. 

“We’ve known each other since second year,” Jungkook continues. He looks over at you. “I didn’t know you know Jimin.” 

“Uh…” You forget how to speak. You’re too busy looking at Jungkook as if you haven’t seen him for years. In a way, it feels like that. Seeing people from college outside of college after a graduation ceremony is like meeting them again for the first time—most of them develop a more independent look. Some look like their life is seconds from falling apart. Some look much happier without the institutional pressure to secure classes and grades and internships. Sadly for you, Jungkook falls under the latter category. Did he always have that twinkle of starlight in his eyes? 

“Y/N and I work together,” Jimin provides, seeming to realize that you weren’t going to answer Jungkook’s question. “She started working about a month ago.” 

“Oh, that’s cool,” Jungkook replies, still looking at you. It is then he seems to notice that the three of you are standing in the middle of the restaurant. Although you are not distracting any patrons, the workers probably don’t appreciate it. “How about we sit down? We’ll be able to catch up more!” 

Jimin seems to regain control of the situation quicker than you do, because he nods at Jungkook. “Let me introduce her to everyone, then we’ll join you.” You look over to where Jungkook had been sitting and immediately notice the previously empty two chairs right across from him—like fate, or something terrible like that. 

So you watch as Jungkook makes his way back to his seat, and Jimin starts to guide you around the table. He only drops a name. Surprisingly, he doesn’t linger, he merely takes you to the next person. It only takes you a second to figure out why. 

“You didn’t tell me you know Jungkook,” Jimin hisses in between the time it takes to travel in between people. 

“I didn’t know you knew Jungkook!” You hiss back. You smile and nod politely at the person Jimin introduces as Yoongi. “Seriously, you never mentioned him once!” 

Jimin only keeps his frustration for a moment before he’s introducing you to someone named Hoseok, a boy with a bright smile, the one who was making Jungkook laugh earlier. “Okay, fine,” He relents, the pair of you finally move to take your seats. “But what was that earlier?” 

“What was what?” 

“You were just staring at him! What, did you have a huge crush on him or something—?” Jimin accuses, but he stops. Just as the pair of you are about to sit down, Jimin parts his lips in realization. “Oh.” Then, he sends you an absolutely wicked grin. “Oh, okay.” 

Your eyes widen at him, murder in your eyes. “Jimin!” 

“So, Y/N,” Jungkook’s voice cuts through your little biting banter with Jimin. 

You whirl around to face Jungkook, eyes completely devoid of murder and voice several pitches higher. “Hi, Jungkook!” 

He smiles, such a wonderful little thing that makes your heart flutter in your chest. “Hi.” 

Jimin ducks his head to hide the fact that he wants nothing more than to burst into fits of laughter. 

“So how have you been?” Jungkook starts up. “I haven’t seen you since graduation. Since you landed a job, you seem to be doing well.” 

“I am!” You manage, only continuing to try and keep a handle on your heart and managing well enough this time. “There were a few months of just scrolling through job postings and writing cover letter after cover letter though.” 

Jungkook laughs, another beautiful gesture that makes you mirror his smile. “I definitely feel that.” 

“Well, what about you? What have you been up to?” You ask. “I think I saw on your Instagram and you were traveling around for a little?” 

His eyes light up at that. “Oh yeah! I don’t know if you remember Kim Mingyu from school?” You do. “Well, he and a friend of his got into some freelancing and had to do some traveling around to work on some filming. He asked me to come along because I actually have some photography experience. So that was a thing I did for a few months.” 

You nod, smiling. “No way! That’s so cool.” 

You do relax after a few conversational exchanges with Jungkook. He’s just as relaxed and mellow, yet friendly and polite as ever, and it’s easy to make conversation with him as it always has been. Eventually, you join in on the larger conversations with the whole table—touching on topics from your university experiences to tales from your new job. A lot of your role, however, falls to listening. Jimin’s friends are rowdy, funny, and out-going. They invite you in like you have been in this group for years—and are able to provide context on older memories they are revisiting. 

Most of your evening, however, is engaging in conversation with Jungkook. Occasionally, Jimin will join in, but he does spend most of his time laughing along to something his other friends are saying. Since you and Jungkook have always been friendly with each other, long conversations aren’t out of the ordinary. You just never considered how well you and Jungkook got along, how easy it would be to transition from topic to topic. 

“I am really glad that Jimin invited you along,” Jungkook explains brightly after the pair of you are done laughing following Jungkook’s tale of another fuck-ups with Kim Mingyu. “Makes you realize how small the world is.” 

“Oh, you should have seen her moping around earlier today,” Jimin interjects, choosing now of all times to insert himself back into your conversation with Jungkook. “She was sighing all afternoon—so maybe we should thank her misery that I decided to invite her along tonight.” 

Jungkook turns to you, a sympathetic look across his face. “Did you have a bad day today?” 

You try for a laugh, waving away Jimin’s words. “Jimin’s just overreacting. Actually, I found out a friend of mine from college is getting married, so I was trying to figure out my plan…” You start, trailing off as you look at Jungkook. “Wait, you didn’t know Irene, did you?” 

“I did.” His eyes widen as his lips part in realization. “Oh my god, you were invited to Irene’s wedding too?” 

“I was!” You exclaim, unsure whether you should be excited or even more nervous at the prospect of potentially seeing Jungkook at the wedding event. “Holy shit, this makes it an even smaller world. How did you know Irene?” 

Jungkook is still mid-giggle at the pure coincidence of everything. “We both knew Mingyu! This is so crazy. Are you planning to go?” 

You shrug. Jimin chooses to interject once more. “That’s what Y/N over here was sighing all afternoon over.” 

You whine as you look at Jimin. “No need to sell me out! Listen, Jungkook.” You turn back to the boy opposite of you, who is still gazing at you. “I’m sure you understand my current predicament.” 

“Sure.” 

“You know how expensive flights can be.” 

“Of course.” 

You fold your arms over each other and rest them on the table. “So, are you planning to go to the wedding?” 

He nods. “Most likely, yeah. I actually knew that the wedding was going to be happening soon, since Mingyu told me about it as soon as Irene got the ring. I ran into the flight problem pretty quickly too, so I decided to just drive to the event.” 

Jimin whistles. “Drive across the country, huh, JK? That must be a four day trip, or something.” 

“It was coming out to be,” Jungkook acknowledges with a nod. “But it’s okay.” He’s grinning, looking excited at the prospect. “I’ve never done a cross country drive before, so it was actually kind of exciting to plan the route. There are a few places I want to stop by and visit. I’m sure it’ll be fun.” Then, Jungkook turns back to you. “If you decide that flying would be too expensive, then you’re more than welcome to come along. It’ll be nice to have some company and not spend four days by myself.” 

Entirely on instinct, you start to laugh. You think he’s joking—how could you not? This is probably one of the longest conversations you’ve ever had with Jungkook. Like you’ve mentioned before, you wouldn’t consider him a friend. Why would he seriously try to invite you on a road trip?  “Yeah, I’m not too sure—I’ve never done a cross country trip before…” 

The conversation shifts pretty quickly as soon as you reply back to Jungkook. Hoseok asks you a question that drags your attention away, simultaneously allowing you to forget about Jungkook’s request. 

The end of the dinner happens soon after, when the bill has been paid and you suspect the long line of people outside waiting for a table are waiting for your party to be done. So venmo exchanges and money debts go around until each member of the table starts standing up one by one to make their move to exit the restaurant. 

You and Jimin are one of the first to leave. Goodbyes are exchanged along with the polite ‘it was nice to meet you’ phrase thrown around. Jungkook is mid-conversation with Yoongi, but he still gives you a quick hug of parting before you and Jimin exit the restaurant. 

The pair of you only make it out a few steps before there is a familiar voice calling your name. “Hey, Y/N! Y/N, wait up!” You stop and turn around, surprised to see Jungkook dashing out of the restaurant. He rests himself for a moment before he’s straightening back up to look at you. 

You try for a smile. “Hey Jungkook, what’s up?” 

He takes in a few more deep breaths to calm himself—either from the dashing he just did or to steel himself for the next question, you don’t know. “It’s about me inviting you to drive up to Irene’s wedding—I just thought I’d let you know it was a serious invitation. Having the company would be nice, and you wouldn’t be a burden to me, seriously. Besides, it’ll be fun to spend some time together.” 

“O-Oh,” You stammer, wringing your hands together. “I’m not too sure… I still have to think about it.” 

“Of course, of course,” Jungkook dismisses good naturedly. “Just thought I’d let you know, so you know that you do have options.” 

Although the offer makes you nervous, you cannot dismiss Jungkook’s thoughtfulness. You give him a more relaxed smile. “I really appreciate that Jungkook, thank you.” 

He smiles at your smile. “No problem! Actually…” He digs around for the wallet in his pocket and produces a little card. “Here’s my business card—my cell phone number is on here so just text or call if you decide to join me. Or,” He presses his lips into a more bashful smile. “You can just text me whenever for whatever reason. I just thought I’d let you know that it was good to see you again.” 

You take the card slowly, unable to look away from Jungkook’s face. He looks so genuine and shy that it doesn’t help your own racing heart. “It was good to see you too, Jungkook…” You return, albeit a little breathlessly. 

He smiles again, dimples pressing in his cheek (and your heart). He turns to Jimin “Oh yeah, nice seeing you too Park.” 

“Hey.” Jimin hits him on the shoulder. “I’m your hyung, you should show me more respect!” 

“My bad, my bad.” Jungkook doesn’t apologize though. His gaze flickers to yours one more time, gaze looking strangely hopeful. “I’ll see you guys around.” He walks backwards a few paces before turning around and returning to the restaurant. Maybe to see his other friends. 

Either way, it doesn’t matter. You are still screaming internally regardless—as shown through your red cheeks, widened eyes, and singing heart. Jimin will certainly never let you live this moment down. 

. 

Now, you are screaming externally. You don’t even give a thought or an explanation. You simply walk into your apartment, nosedive for the couch, and start yelling into one of the throw pillows. 

There’s a rapid movement of footsteps coming from down the hallway almost immediately, one that grows gradually louder until the owner of the steps starts speaking. “Who the fuck is out there? I’ve played softball my entire life and therefore will not hesitate to drive this bat so far up your ass—oh, Y/N.” The voice lowers significantly, as does the threat level it emits into the air. “It’s just you.” 

You lift your face from the throw pillow, and immediately brush away at the hair that falls in your face. “What the fuck!” You croak, pushing yourself into a sitting position and pointing at the bat in Karly’s hands. “What are you doing threatening me with a bat? You’ve never played a game of softball in your life!” 

“Oh, this isn’t mine. It’s Soonyoung’s.” Soonyoung is Karly’s boyfriend from high school, who used to play baseball on the high school team. How Karly has her boyfriend’s baseball bat is a mystery, but it’s something you think you are better off not asking about. She places the bat down on the carpet next to the coffee table. “But I should be asking you the questions, you bitch! You scared the shit out of me!” 

You sigh, throwing your head to rest on the back of the couch. “Sorry, sorry. Had a crazy day.” 

Karly ponders this as she moves to take a seat next to you. “You seemed fine when you texted me about you getting drinks with Jimin. Did something happen during the dinner?” 

You straighten up again and grip Karly by the arm. “Okay, don’t scream.” 

“You mean like you did?” Karly retorts dryly. 

You shake her. “I’m serious!” When Karly doesn’t say anything, you take it as a sign to continue with your story. “I saw Jungkook.” 

Karly blinks, then grabs your arm right back. “Wait, Jeon Jungkook, as in the guy you’ve been crushing on since second year?” 

“Yes!” You whine, throwing yourself onto the couch all over again. 

“The one you had to work together on a project with and nearly cried even though you guys just had to submit a paper?” 

“Yes!” 

“The one who said hi to you in the library that one time and you tried to put your elbow on the table afterwards but you missed and hit your head instead?” 

You pause, scowling. “Okay, now you’re just being mean. Are you done?” 

Karly is laughing. “Oh my god. What are the chances of you seeing him now?” 

“There’s more,” You groan out. 

“Really? Honestly that yell could have been just for seeing him again and that would have made sense—!” 

You ignore her. “He’s friends with Jimin. He’s friends with Irene, too. He was invited to her wedding.” 

“Wait, Jimin is friends with Irene or Jungkook is friends with Irene—?” 

“He won’t pay for the flight though. It’s too expensive. I can attest to that.” 

Karly holds a finger up, trying to connect the dots. “When did you look up flight prices—?” 

“So he invited me on a cross country road trip to Irene’s wedding.” 

Karly frowns. 

You sigh. “Jungkook invited me on a cross country road trip to Irene’s wedding.” 

“Oh! Oh!” Karly’s eyes widen. “Oh my god, that’s huge. Are you gonna go?” 

“I don’t know!” You whine. “Jungkook mentioned it would be a four day drive to get there. I don’t know if I can survive four days in a car with him! We’ve never been that close, what if it gets awkward?” 

Karly ponders this. “I really don’t think it’s in Jungkook’s nature to be awkward with someone—especially someone he’s had a history with.” She sees the look of disbelief you give her. “Well, even if that history was really limited. What makes you think it’ll be awkward? Was it awful seeing him tonight?” 

“No!” You cry, straightening into a sitting position so your legs drape over the side of the couch. You force yourself to calm down. “It… it was pretty good actually.” 

Karly raises an eyebrow, amusement dancing in her eyes. “Really now.” 

“Yeah…” You reply, trailing off. “We sat across from each other during the dinner and we talked most of the night, surprisingly. I guess because we were sort of acquaintances we’ve always known about each other, so it wasn’t like we didn’t know how to ask questions to each other. And Jungkook… he’s easy to talk to as he’s always been and he’s so nice and positive and he has a dimple on his cheek when he smiles…” You finish slowly, noticing your racing heart that has come up as a result of this conversation and of your memory. You realize the predicament you’re in, further emphasized by Karly’s growing grin. You groan. “Shut up.” 

Karly looks like a Cheshire cat. “I didn’t say anything.” 

You grab onto one of the throw pillows and properly hit her in the face. “You’re saying many things right now, you bitch!” 

Karly takes the pillow from you and proceeds to whack you in the shoulder. “Not outloud!” 

“So you admit it!” You accuse, pointing at her. 

Karly yells. “Just admit you still have a crush on him!” 

Your groan turns into a cry. “Don’t say it outloud! Now I have to deal with it!” 

Your roommate sighs. “Bitch, I can tell you exactly how to deal with this. You’re gonna go on this road trip with Jungkook and see if you guys vibe—you honestly will not find a better way to discover your compatibility with him. If it works out, then you get more than a plus one to the wedding. If it doesn’t work out, just skip the wedding and take the first flight back home. Cut off your friendship with Jimin while you’re at it—it’s the only way to ensure you’ll never have to run into Jungkook again.” 

You pout. “That seems a little dramatic.” 

Karly thinks for a second, then she nudges you. “Remind me again about that quote your high school English teacher used to always parade around.” 

You stare at her for a moment, because you know exactly what point she’s trying to make. Still, you decide to humor her. And yourself. “‘You’ll never know if you’ll sink, swim, or float, until you’re willing to take the plunge’.” You level Karly with another gaze. Your friend has a point. You missed any chance to hang out with Jungkook during your college years—partly because your friend groups never intersected, but mostly because of your internalized fear of fucking up. But now that you are just a little older and just a little more versed in the art of conversing and befriending—maybe Karly is right. Maybe this is your chance to see if a different set of timing could make a difference. 

So you sigh. 

“I guess I should text Jungkook, huh.” 

Karly pats you on the shoulder. “Take the plunge, my dude.” 

.

You do take the plunge. You take Jungkook’s business card out from the pocket of your dress and dial the number. He expresses excitement—and also relief. 

These things lead up to the current moment. Eight o’clock in the morning: you lingering in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, your suitcase by the door, and a roommate keeping you company. 

You don’t realize how nervous you are until you get a text from Jungkook. 

Jungkook (8:03am): i’m here! u can buzz me up so i can help u with your stuff :) 

You (8:03am): it’s ok jungkook it’s just a suitcase. i’ll be down in a second! 

You pocket your phone, and Karly can read the expression across your face before you realize what is going on. She straightens up. “He’s here?” 

“Yeah.” You rinse your coffee cup and make your way towards the door. “Did you want to come down with me?” 

Karly stops and gives you a look. “I thought that was already implied.” 

“Well, thanks, that’s really nice—!” 

“Someone has to give you an embarrassing goodbye.” 

“There it is.” You sigh. You don’t say anything as you and Karly exit the apartment and make your way down the hall into the elevator. It only takes a few seconds for the elevator to lower down to the ground floor, where you and Karly exit and make your way to the front of the apartment complex. 

You swear your heart beats just a little faster as soon as you see Jungkook near the front entrance of the building. He’s wearing a pair of black jackets with an oversized denim jacket and currently looking down at his phone—overall appearing so tall and pretty and otherworldly. For a brief second, you are taken by the fact that for the next four days, he’ll be yours. 

Jungkook looks up as soon as he hears the door opening and he smiles. “Hey you.” 

You smile, albeit a little lopsided and dreamy. “Hi.” 

Jungkook walks towards you immediately. “Here, let me help you with that.” He reaches a hand out and gently takes the handle of your suitcase before you can say anything. Just as he’s taking the suitcase from you, Karly emerges from the building. “Oh, sorry about that.” 

Karly waves him off. “Don’t be. I’m Y/N’s roommate—I’m just here to see her off.” 

Jungkook stares at her for a moment, then he snaps his fingers. “Wait, I remember you. You went to college with us too.” He jerks his chin towards you. “You hung out with Y/N a lot, right?” 

“Yeah, I’m Karly.” She holds out her hand for Jungkook to shake. “And you’re right, she and I hung out a lot. We were roommates back then too.” 

Jungkook nods in understanding, before shoving his hand into his pocket. His other hand is still holding onto your suitcase. “Well, I promise to take good care of Y/N.” 

Karly smacks her teeth against the side of her mouth as she points at him. “You’re a good man, Jungkook.” She pauses for a moment, seeming to contemplate a new thought. You recognize the look immediately, and your fingers twitch as if you want to strangle her. Or at least let her know you’re throwing her a look of murderous intent. But of course, Karly doesn’t see it. And even if she had, you doubt she’d care. “But no funny business, alright.” 

You gape at her. “Karly!” 

Jungkook coughs at that. “I-It’s just a drive—y-you don’t need to worry about that.” He does, however, turn away to hide the red that dusts his cheeks. 

As soon as Jungkook’s back is facing you, you whirl around to shoot Karly with a glare. “Karly, you’re lucky I’m leaving for the next four days or I would not hesitate to figure out how to make stuffocation look like an accident!” You hiss out between teeth without taking a breath. 

Karly glares right back. “You’re really dumb, aren’t you? The fact that he recognizes me because he saw you hanging out with me on campus doesn’t strike any chords? Even though, like you said, you guys weren’t really friends?” 

You blink. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” 

Karly widens her eyes. “What the fuck do you mean? Are you dumb with all the boys or just Jungkook?” 

“What do you mean!” You snap back. 

“So, Y/N, ready to go?” 

You whirl back around to find Jungkook now standing in front of you and Karly. He must have finished packing your suitcase in the trunk of his car and is now looking over at you with a tilt in his head. 

So you force a smile. “Of course,” You say, turning to Karly. “I was just saying bye to my roommate.” 

He nods in understanding, sparing one more glance at Karly before seeming to decide against it because he looks away. He’s still a little red at Karly’s previous comment. “We should get going then.” 

“Sure.” You look over at your roommate. “See you, bitch.” 

Karly waves back, grinning wildly. You just know she has several other thoughts she’d like to share with you, but has probably deemed you embarrassed enough. Lucky for you, she keeps her mouth shut. 

Unlucky for you, without Karly to be a barrier of distraction, this leaves you alone with Jungkook. You slide into the passenger seat of his car, still not yet processing the weight of what you’ve just agreed to. You fiddle alone for a second before Jungkook is opening the driver’s side and shifting into his seat. 

There is a silence as Jungkook is starting the car, and a part of you wants to die. Or at least have the ground swallow you whole. Holy fuck, what did you just sign up for? 

Your mind somehow takes five seconds to turn into complete shambles that you almost miss Jungkook’s question. 

“Here, I’m giving you an important mission,” Jungkook says, rummaging through the various chords that lay over the center console before producing an aux cord. “Should you choose to accept.” 

He’s got on such a serious expression you momentarily forget about your anxiety. His usage of the iconic line from Mission Impossible makes you laugh—a breathy sort of noise that escapes when your mind is too full. You still take the aux cord. “Oh my god—ever heard of bluetooth?” 

He pouts. “It hasn’t even been five minutes and you’re already insulting my beautiful Celia!” 

You raise both your eyebrows. “Celia?” 

“Yeah, that’s the name of my car.” He catches the bewildered look you give him before angling himself back to face the steering wheel, where he shifts his console into drive and makes a turn onto the main street. “If you’re already weirded out by the fact I have a name for my baby, then you’re in for a very long four days, Miss. Y/N.” 

You giggle, feeling that distraction of nerves start to come off your shoulders. “Not weird at all.” You pause. “Ryan is the name of my car.” 

“Ah!” He holds one arm out in a grand gesture. “You see, not so strange after all.” He steals a glance at you, watching as you’re about to connect your phone to the aux cord. “Wait!” He says, pointing a finger at you. 

You look up at him, wide eyes. 

He’s still holding an arm up. “How’s your music taste?” 

You’re still giving him your surprised expression. “You scared me!” 

He laughs, returning his hand back to the steering wheel. “Sorry, sorry. I have to ask though—I’d rather know now than later, so I can kick you out and not feel as bad about it.” 

Your laughter seems to melt away the last of your nervous energy. “Nice to know you’re putting all your cards out now.” You look down at your phone. “Regarding my music taste… it’s whatever you want dude! I have some lo-fi on here, some pop, alternative, Broadway, anime openings… an ‘everything’ playlist. Honestly, the world is your oyster.” 

“How about we start with your ‘everything’ playlist,” Jungkook suggests. “That way I can judge you immediately.” 

“Were you always this charming, Jeon Jungkook?” You retort. “Or has graduation changed you?” 

“Oh, I’ve always been this charming—you just never noticed.” 

That comment, however, goes over your head as you focus down on your playlist. You look over, selecting the shuffle option as Taylor Swift’s soft music from her newest album fills the air. Another silence fills the car, but it’s much more peaceful and comfortable. You allow yourself to settle further into the passenger seat of Jungkook’s car. 

“So,” You start after a moment. Jungkook hums to let you know he’s paying attention. “What inspired the name Celia?” 

Jungkook brightens at the question. “She was this character from a book I read when I was younger. The Night Circus? Anyways, the book is about these two illusionists who try to one up each other with their skills of magic, but they end up falling in love. Celia is the name of one of those illusionists.” 

You grin. “Sounds like a very cute crush.” 

Jungkook grins back. 

The drive out of the city continues like this. The pair of you cover the topic of books, of music, of your favorite animes. Jungkook just has this magical power of ensuring the tension dissipates from your mind and stays gone—whether it’s through his relaxed nature or easy-going teasing or his ability to ease the conversation from one topic to the next. It feels like every conversation you and Jungkook had in college, whether vague or circling around classes, all have led up to this moment. It seems like everytime you or Jungkook run out of things to talk about pertaining to a certain topic, you would bring up memories from college and just continue from there. Everything feels natural. 

It continues to feel natural even as you and Jungkook slowly start to see the edges of the city landscape fade away. The high rises fade into shorter buildings and smaller business areas that surround the bustling city scene. You watch as those buildings and business areas become rows of houses. Residential areas in the suburbs, passing by the occasional school or corner restaurants. 

“Before we enter the wide unknown,” Jungkook starts up, breaking the quiet that has enveloped the car. “You want to pick up lunch? You hungry?” 

You haven’t even realized how much time has gone by until you look at the clock on Jungkook’s dashboard and notice that it’s past noon. You widen your eyes at the sight. “Wow, I didn’t even realize so much time had passed.” 

“Yeah, we drove through a few cities. Time flies when you’re having fun, huh?” 

“You wish,” You tease, sticking your tongue out. “So, what, do we stop at a Cheesecake factory or something?” 

Jungkook blinks. “I thought you were poor—why would we stop at the Cheesecake factory? And why is that the first restaurant that comes to your mind?” 

You wave your hands. “It was just a suggestion!” 

“Well, I’m realizing that I should probably let you know that the motel I picked for us to drive to tonight is pretty far out—Google Maps says we probably won’t get there until midnight, and that’s with us driving straight through.” 

“Midnight? Fuck, Jungkook. Will we make it to the wedding a day early or something?” 

“Ha, ha, no. I’ll go over the schedule I planned out tomorrow. Basically, I want to try and cover most of our ground on the first day so we can take the rest of the trip easy. But I thought I’d let you know now that sitting in a restaurant probably won’t be the most time responsible idea.” 

“That’s true.” You look out the window again and see the golden arches of McDonalds appear within your line of sight. “Let’s just stop at McDonalds.” 

Jungkook follows your gaze. “Alright, down. Let’s do it.” 

He exits off the freeway, following down a route that takes him almost immediately towards the McDonalds parking lot. Since this restaurant is still within the lines of the city, it’s not completely deserted. There are a few cars in the parking lot, even fewer cars in the drive-through line. Because of this, ordering the food only takes a few minutes. Both of you get chicken nuggets, sodas, and large orders of french fries. 

“You know, we’re really living like kings,” You comment as Jungkook drives out and makes his way back onto the freeway. “College graduates, both somehow able to secure a job, and still ordering chicken mcnuggets.” 

Jungkook shrugs. “I wasn’t told this is what adulthood would be like. But I’m not complaining. My 10-year-old self is singing in so much joy right now.” He says this as he’s stuffing a handful of fries into your mouth. You laugh, and hand him a napkin. 

You turn the music back on. The pair of you silently munch on your chicken nuggets, as you angle your head towards the side window once again. As Jungkook drives, the numbers of structural spaces become more scattered the longer you both continue down the freeway. 

The anime opening to Haikyuu starts playing when you turn back to Jungkook and realize that he’s trying to close the box of his chicken nuggets. You move right away, taking the cardboard from him and closing it yourself. “Let me know if you need anything, Jungkook. Think of me as your co-pilot.” 

He laughs gently. “Is that the rule of the passenger seat?” 

You shrug, putting the empty box into the McDonalds bag near your feet. “For me at least. Everytime I do one of these drives with family, the person in the passenger seat has to open the snacks, make conversation, and always stay awake with the driver. It’s just courtesy.”

Jungkook is smiling softly now, mostly to himself, but it lights the corners of his eyes that makes you momentarily unable to look away. “You wanna tell me about your family?” 

So you do. Your voice becomes softer as you continue, but Jungkook listens to every single word you say. 

True to his observation, it’s not long before the pair of you are surrounded by the wide unknown. Houses in the suburbs become farmhouses and farms. Conversations fade from your family to another comfortable silence as you continue gazing out the window. Jungkook requests your lo-fi playlist at some point, filling the car with the soft and distorted hums. It allows your mind to wander as you stare out the window. The empty stretches of land around you are filled with greenery, with mountains, cutting right through the perfect blue of the sky above you. 

By 4:00PM, your entire body is starting to feel the ache of having been seated for long hours on end. You feel the tightness in the muscles of your thigh, the bones in your knees. 

Jungkook must be feeling the same, because as soon as a sign for a rest stop comes on, he exits the freeway and pulls into a large parking lot. There’s a restroom on the side, but the area is surrounded by trees with mountains standing in the background. 

Jungkook stops the car. “We should get out for a bit to move our legs.” 

You’re already tugging on the latch that’ll open the car door. “I’m already feeling it in my knees.” You open the door and immediately extend your legs out onto the solid ground beneath you. You let out a sigh of satisfaction, and Jungkook laughs from next to you. 

He’s opening his own car door soon after, but he straightens up into a standing position pretty quickly and stretches upwards. He closes the car door behind him, watching as you eventually pull yourself together to do the same. 

You turn to face Jungkook. “I’m gonna use the restroom.” You gesture towards the building and earn a nod from Jungkook, who mentions something about doing the same thing. You meet back at the car a few minutes later. 

Jungkook gestures to the trees surrounding the parking lot. “Want to take a walk around the area? Keep the blood flowing to our legs.” 

You nod. “That sounds like a good idea.” 

“Why don’t you get started. I’ll catch up.” Jungkook watches you leave, before opening the trunk of his car and rummaging around. 

He does catch up with you, quickly enough that you hardly notice that he had sent you out first. You hear his footsteps, and the call of your name. You turn around. “Jungkook!” 

The sight before you makes you waver slightly, as bouts of shyness overtake you. Standing before you is Jungkook, with his camera in hand. The lens is pointed right at you. As soon as you’re staring straight into the camera, Jungkook grins. “Say hi!” 

You whine, whirling back around and covering your face. “Are you filming me right now?” 

“I’m a photographer at heart, what did you expect?” Jungkook teases back. “Besides, it’s really pretty around here. You think I won’t film it?” 

You snort, starting your walk around the parking lot. “Oh yeah, because there aren’t any parking lots and trees and bathroom stops at home.” 

Jungkook is quiet for a second. “That’s not what I meant.” 

You turn to stare right into the lens of his camera. “Then the mountains, right?” 

He’s quiet for another second. “Sure.” He does, however, sound a little disappointed. You do not notice this. 

The pair of you stay quiet as you make your round around the parking lot, taking in the mountains from different angles. The walk around is mostly just to rid of the sensation of your legs falling off, but it’s still a nice view to admire. As soon as you finish a complete round, you and Jungkook return back to the car. You watch as he carefully places his camera into his camera bag before you’re both back in your seats. 

Jungkook turns to you. “Ready to get going again?” He looks at the control panel behind his steering wheel. “We’ll probably have to stop for gas in a few hours. But after that, it’s straight to the hotel.” 

You settle back into the passenger seat. “I guess we already have our dinner plans then.” You’re referring to the gas station. 

Jungkook grins. “I’m down for that.” 

And so, the trip continues back on the freeway. With the lo-fi playing in the background, you watch as the sun tears through the blue sky, as the sun finally begins it’s dip to the other side. The singular color once spread across the pane of atmosphere now conjugates around the sun crawling behind the mountain—creating a diffusion of new colors. The corner of the mountain emits an explosion of oranges, pinks, and purples. 

You lift your head from the window, eyes taking in the rainbow of pastels around the now fading sun. “Wow, Jungkook, look at that sunset.” 

He snorts. “You wanna talk about things that you can’t see back in the city?” 

You pout. “But it looks so pretty, see!” You keep gesturing towards the sunset. 

Jungkook relents just enough to spare a glance in the direction. He hums. “Yeah, it’s pretty.” He looks back at the road. “Can’t really find a view like that in the city.” 

You spend a little more time admiring the sunset than Jungkook does, for obvious reasons. You’ve seen a sunset plenty of times before in the past, but the context of this whole situation makes you unable to look away from it. You’re really out here, stuck in a car with someone you have never hung out with for longer than a few minutes. But you are enjoying yourself. There's peace in that. 

So you watch until the sun dips below the mountain, momentarily leaving the sky in a navy color. 

The next time Jungkook speaks, the area around you is much darker, and the sky is nearly black. “You hungry now?” 

You lift your head from the seat, not even realizing you were drifting off. You’re thinking about Irene, wondering if you should have texted her directly congratulating her on the wedding rather than just simply sending in the RSVP. “Sure. We eat as the car eats, right?” 

Jungkook smiles, a gesture you can barely make out from the headlines. “Of course.” 

This goes on for a few more miles until the sign for a gas station comes up. A few other cars linger near the dispensers. Jungkook parks near his choice and gets out of the car. You follow behind him. He’s already sliding his credit card into the machine, and the sight makes you reach over to grab his wrist. 

“I should pay, you’ve been driving all day!” 

He shakes his head, waving you off. “We’ll take turns, okay?” He looks at you. “Buy me dinner tonight too, that sound fair?” 

You pout, leaning back as you cross your arms. “Not really, but I guess I’ll have to accept it.” 

He grins. “You are correct.” 

As soon as the gas pump alerts you of the filled tank, Jungkook returns the pump back to the machine and locks his car. Together, the two of you make your way towards the convenience store, where the bell above rings to alert the workers of your presence. Nods are exchanged as you and Jungkook tear through the aisles to find anything that could satisfy your cravings. You return back with family size bags of hot cheetos and beef jerky, while Jungkook holds his selection of roasted seaweed and Doritos. You select your drinks together before returning to the cashier. 

It’s nearing 9:00PM as you and Jungkook return back to his car, where you slide back into your seats and immediately tear into your bags of salt and sodium. 

“How are you doing?” You ask as Jungkook finishes his first bag of roasted seaweed. 

Jungkook pulls out his phone, scrolling through the final stretch needed to reach the hotel. “Yeah, about four more hours to the motel.” He looks over at you. “I’m good. The salt in this seaweed really helps. How are you doing?” 

You nod immediately. “Great. Perfect.” 

He smiles, shifting his console to drive and pulling out of the gas station. “I’m used to these weird hours. Remember how I told you I traveled around a bit with Mingyu and Wonwoo? There was this one day we only slept for an hour or something? It sucked, I think I almost passed out that day. But yeah, this is honestly not even that bad.” He turns to look at you. “I think the good company helps, too.” 

You roll your eyes, grinning. “You flatter me, Jeon.” 

Slowly, 8PM turns into 10PM. One glance at Google maps tells you that you’re still two hours from the hotel. Even though you’re not the one driving, and although you haven’t endured any physical activity that could result in this exhaustion, you still find yourself growing tired. Something about sitting under the sun, sitting in a vehicle that rocks side to side with a consistent hum—it makes your mind work slowly and therefore brings out the sleepiness quicker. 

You settle deeper into your seat. 

Jungkook giggles from next to you. “You tired already?” 

You pout slowly, eyes closed just enough. “I’m not a morning person and you made me wake up at 8!” 

“Sure, sure, of course.” 

There’s a pause. 

You ponder a question for a moment. It’s something that you would never dare ask Jungkook if you had been more awake and more alert. But you’re tired, and your defenses are lowered, and it means you are more prone to asking questions. “Hey, Jungkook? Did you have any girlfriends when we were in college?” 

Jungkook doesn’t answer immediately. “Where’s this coming from?” He asks instead. 

You shrug, making a dismissive noise as your shoulders rise up. “Curiosity.” 

A pause. “I went on a few dates, but I never had a serious relationship.” 

“No way.” You lift your head up from the seat. “But I remember seeing you hang out with the occasional girl in the quad, or at some restaurants around the school.” 

Jungkook smiles. It’s hard to read the look in his eyes. They’re focused on the road in front of him, but they seem almost hazy and faraway. “Like I said, I went on a few dates. I did really want to get into a long term relationship in college. A lot of my friends had them, that’s where my parents met, so I was really open to the idea of at least experimenting. There were a lot of girls that I thought were nice, easy-going, or just really pretty, so I tried my hand in the whole dating thing.” 

“And it didn’t work out?” You coax out gently. 

“Not really,” He continues. He steals a glance at you. “We’d go on a few dates, but none of them ever felt substantial. I think girls see me and have a certain expectation—an expectation I couldn’t meet. So I never could picture myself in a long term relationship with any of them.” 

You tilt your head towards him. “There must have been someone…” 

“Well… there was one girl.” Jungkook starts after a moment. He’s not looking at you this time. “We had a few classes together earlier—we weren’t in the same major program. I don’t even know if I’d say we were close or anything. We just had a few classes and saw each other around on occasion. But the conversations we did have during class or outside of class just felt more real. Honestly, I could have been totally wrong about her. I could have just been blinded by all these expectations I was putting on her, which is ironic. But she was the only person I could actually see myself being in a long term relationship with. Or at least try.” 

You hum, still facing towards him in your seat. “Why didn’t you try anything then? You’re a good guy, Jungkook. I’m sure she would have wanted to try with you too.” 

“I guess I was just afraid of pushing it and scaring her off. I thought it was better to stay friends with her than try to pursue something. She never gave me an indication that she felt the same.” 

“And how do you feel now?” 

There’s a pause this time. “I don’t know honestly. We remained friends up until graduation but, uh, never saw her again. I do wonder from time to time how she’s doing.” 

“You should reach out to her,” You advise softly. “Since you guys were friends before, I’m sure asking her out just to catch up won’t seem so weird.” You grin at him. “You need to make your move.” 

It is then that Jungkook turns to look at you. He looks for a little longer this time, eyes focused entirely on you. Underneath the small crescent of the moon above, you are still able to make out his facial features. His cheeks, his nose, his eyes—the latter is glimmering, like he knows something that you don’t. 

“I’m working on that,” He mumbles softly. You turn your head back towards the road. 

. 

You wake up the next morning feeling groggy, dirty, and messy. Your head lifts up from a pillow you can only vaguely remember falling on, laying on top of a bed you only vaguely remember throwing yourself in. There’s sunlight pouring into the room, but it feels like early morning sun. There’s a crisp in the air that you can feel, that you see out of the window. Right outside is the gathering of bushes and trees, a bright blue sky.

You are in the motel. 

Slowly, you push yourself into a sitting position, until you’re resting atop the white linen of your bed. Across the room, snuggled in his own twin bed, is Jungkook. His lashes are fanning across his cheekbones, his lips are parted, and his breathing is slow and soft.

It isn’t until Jungkook shifts in bed that you realize you’ve been watching him like a creep. Hastily, you tear your gaze away and decide to focus your gaze down. You notice immediately that you are not underneath the blankets. Instead, you are lying underneath Jungkook’s jacket. 

You roll the jacket off your frame, discovering that you are still in last night’s clothes—which explains why you were feeling so groggy and discombobulated. You look across the floor of the hotel room. Your suitcase is near the foot of your bed, and your phone sits on your nightstand connected to your charger. 

Vaguely, you recall what had happened the previous night—how Jungkook drove into the hotel room nearing midnight and the exhaustion was so overpowering that you and Jungkook blindly asked for any room with two twin beds before following through and practically collapsing into your respected beds. 

You definitely did that, which explains why you were on top of the bed, why you’re still in yesterday’s clothes, and why Jungkook’s jacket was your blanket. Stealing another glance at Jungkook: underneath the blankets and in a different t-shirt—you can assume that he was able to take a shower before lying down. 

With a sigh, you push off Jungkook’s jacket and lay it down on the bed next to you. Hoping not to disturb Jungkook, you slide out of bed and lower your suitcase to the ground. After fishing out a new set of clothes, you decide to take a shower. 

The warmth from the shower is the best breath of fresh air you’ve gotten since hitting the road with Jungkook. It feels like your body is going through a battery recharge, and it’s one you take your time with. You step out of the shower, running the towel through your hair and drying yourself enough to slip on your outfit for the day. The towel is thrown around your neck as you step out of the shower, letting the steam follow you out of the bathroom. 

Jungkook is still sleeping as you step out, which is good otherwise you’d feel bad for having disturbed his sleep time. After all the driving he did yesterday, you figure he deserves a few extra hours regardless of what the schedule calls for. 

You continue running the towel through your hair as you pick up your phone. Strangely, you do not remember connecting it to a charger before knocking out, but you pick it up regardless to see the 9:00AM time across your screen. 

There’s a quiet that takes over, in which you’re sitting perched comfortably on your bed and scrolling through your phone as Jungkook continues to drift a few feet away from you. 

About thirty minutes seem to pass before Jungkook is moaning softly to himself, letting out a puff of air as he slowly opens his eyes. His arms extend above him, knocking into the headboard and making him curse softly to himself. His eyes open as he lowers his hands to inspect the damage before immediately looking over towards you. 

He blinks, a tired smile overtaking his lips as he arches his back into a stretch. “Hey,” He greets, voice rough and scratchy and making your heart clench. Damn thing. “You’re awake. You knocked out pretty quickly as soon as we got the room.” 

You laugh. “Yeah, I honestly figured that.” You pick up his jacket, as if he hadn’t been the one to lay it on you those hours ago. “Thanks for trying to help me get comfortable.” You gesture towards the nightstand. “Did you find my charger too?” 

Jungkook sits up as he continues a small round of stretches and yawns. “I did,” He says. “You were barely coherent, but made enough sense to tell me where it was in your bag. Sorry for going through it, by the way.” 

You shake your head, waving him off. “No worries. Thank you again, Jungkook.” 

The pair of you stare at each other for a few moments, before that silence is broken by Jungkook’s phone going off. You look down as Jungkook snatches his own phone off the nightstand. He scrolls through something, before placing it back. 

“So, what’s the plan for today?” You ask, bringing your fingers through your hair to comb and give you a distraction. 

“Oh! Right.” Jungkook swings his legs off the side of the bed. “We have a slower day today. The hotel I picked is only about five hours away? We’re driving through the mountains today, so there’s this place I want to visit that has a little restaurant and everything. It’ll be a cute pit stop.” 

You nod. “Awesome, okay.” You curl your fingers around the strands of now loose strands of hair. 

It takes another hour until you and Jungkook are packed up again and ready to leave. A quick stop to the lobby provides both of you with a bagel and cup of coffee each as your breakfast. All before you’re once again sliding into the passenger seat of Jungkook’s car. 

You roll your shoulders before clicking your seatbelt in. “Ready for another long day?” 

“Of course.” He digs through his center console, producing his aux cord. “Your mission,” He says dramatically, not unlike yesterday. “Should you choose to accept.” 

You laugh gently, taking the cord. “You in love with Mission Impossible or something? This is the second time in two days you’re quoting it to me.” 

And this is how your day starts off—talks of Mission Impossible films that bleed into conversations about movies. 

The day at 10 o’clock in the morning is bright and blue as Jungkook drives back onto the freeway and continues down the road. The first few hours consist of the surrounding flatland, of green grass and high mountains all around. Conversations between you and Jungkook are a little more scattered today, but there’s a new level of comfort about the situation. With both of you well rested, it invites a more relaxed atmosphere as you pass the occasional joke or story time between the pair of you. 

As the sun continues to travel higher in the sky, Jungkook’s car starts it’s approach up the mountain. The trees start enveloping the pair of you into a newer, higher world. Not only that, but whenever you and Jungkook reach a clearing, it exposes a dip of lakes, grass, and mountains. And you, always having enjoyed the views of nature, keep an open eye for every single thing. 

You see Jungkook’s choice of destination before he does, and you gasp excitedly. 

Up ahead is a cloud of pink, white, and red flowers covering an entire mountain side. There is an occasional pop of cedar trees amongst the covering of pink, white, and red, but the colors are so poignant that it captures your attention immediately. 

You point to it. “Is that where we’re going?” 

Jungkook grins. “Surprise!” He’s selected this spot before offering the invitation to let you come along, but you’re not complaining. You’ve never been to a flower farm before, despite having heard about them and seen pictures of them for most of your childhood. You continue to watch with wide eyes and bright smiles as Jungkook drives closer and closer to the destination, finally parking in the appropriate lot after paying the fee. 

You’re practically vibrating in your seat with excitement. “Jungkook, Jungkook, c’mon let’s go, let’s go!” You push on the latch and nearly tumble out onto the ground. You straighten to stand on your feet, before meeting Jungkook near the trunk of his car. Surprise, surprise, he pulls out his camera and loops the strap over his head. 

He’s grinning as he closes the trunk. “You’re a little excited, aren’t you?” 

“A little?” You echo, clapping your hands, seemingly unable to wipe the grin off your face. “Jungkook, this is a flower farm! It’s so exciting!” 

So you dart off with Jungkook following closely behind you. The parking lot is located at the top of the flower farm, so the tour around the fields is a downwards one towards the bottom. A small pathway maps out a route for you to follow as you take in the various lines of flowers and colors. One short glimpse at the brochure tells you that these are spring flowers, and that you and Jungkook are visiting during the perfect season. You and Jungkook continue through your makeshift tour in silence, taking in the flowers as well as the view that extends out far beyond your line of sight while Jungkook snaps photographs behind you. Words don’t need to be said when everything around you says it all. 

At the bottom of the field is a cafe, a small brick building with an outdoor seating area facing the now upward flower display. You and Jungkook order sandwiches and soda, and take your seats outside as you wait for your number to be called. There are a fair amount of people today at the field, most of which you can see ahead roaming through the flowers ahead. 

“Have you ever been to a flower farm before?” Jungkook asks, as he glances over at you to see how bright your expression is. 

You smile as you turn to him. “No, never. But thank you for bringing me here, it’s beautiful here.” 

Jungkook smiles, looking a little smug. He looks proud of himself. “I’ve always wanted to come here, so I’m glad I was able to bring you along.” It looks like he wants to say more, but the number that rests between Jungkook’s fingers is called out, interrupting the conversation. He returns a moment later with the food. “I actually wanted to ask you something,” He says, taking the sandwich plate off the tray and placing it in front of you. 

You take the napkins that are being offered to you. “What’s up?” 

He settles down into his seat. “I didn’t get to return the question that you asked me last night.” 

It takes you a second to realize what he’s referring to. Immediately, you feel yourself turn red as you press your lips together. You were definitely drowsy last night, and hadn’t put too much consideration in the aftermath of asking Jungkook about his college relationships. You instead try for a laugh, as you wave him off. “Well, you don’t need to ask me. It’s pretty boring.” 

“Nonsense,” Jungkook brushes off, taking another bite of his sandwich. “So tell me, did you get into any relationships in college?” 

You laugh, albeit a little nervously. “No, not really. I never even went on any dates before—I guess, like you, I just couldn’t see myself in any long term relationship with anyone that seemed to like me.” 

“Well, how about crushes on your end? Did you like anyone?” 

You gaze over at Jungkook—taking in his wide curious eyes, his soft voice, his contagious laugh. The memories of him waving at you in class, of him catching up to you afterwards to continue previous conversations, of him going out of his way to say hi to you in the library. Jungkook has always been thoughtful, considerate, and soft along the edges. How could you not have crushed on him during college? 

And how could you not continue to have these lingering feelings for him afterwards? 

You think about your own advice you had given to Jungkook. You should reach out to her. Since you guys were friends before, I’m sure asking her out just to catch up won’t seem so weird. You need to make your move. Could you even follow your own advice? 

You look down before Jungkook could start asking questions about your staring. “There was this one guy,” You start, trying for an uneasy laugh. “But I don’t think he ever noticed me. Well, that’s a lie. I guess we were kind of friends? I think it’s more along the lines of me being out of his league.” 

“That’s depressing,” Jungkook notes as he finishes his sandwich. You hardly even noticed him inhaling the thing. “How could you be out of a guy’s league? You’re so smart and funny and easy to talk to—if anything, a guy would probably be out of your league.” He leans forward, bringing you close enough where you can clearly make out the mole underneath his lip. “Tell me about this punk. So I can tell you he’s not good enough for you.” 

You laugh, keeping your gaze on him. You doubt he’d be so confident had he known about ‘this punk’. “He isn’t a punk,” You remark quietly. “He’s really nice, and really sweet. I was pretty quiet in college. Definitely introverted and kept to myself and had a hard time making friends. Although I would have honestly barely considered him a friend, he just made me feel like my time was meaningful and my attention was valuable to him.” Jungkook’s eyes continue to bore into yours. “If anything, I just wish he knew how much I admire him.” 

Jungkook’s gaze is unwavering across your face, once again displaying that unreadable expression. Yet, despite that, something glimmers in his eyes and he seems to come to an understanding you yourself don’t know about. That glimmer keeps swimming across the orbs, even as he switches his gaze between your eyes. They flicker down to your lips for a second, and your heart stutters in your chest. 

Jungkook coughs, pulling away from you as he seems to hyper-focus his attention on the soda still in front of him. He looks shy as he steals another glance at you from across the table. “He might not have made you feel that important if you were too scared to tell him how you felt.” 

You look down at your sandwich and take another bite. Something about the way he’s staring holes into the side of your face tells you that he knows something that you don’t. You wonder what he’s thinking. 

Jungkook wears that thoughtful expression for the rest of the visit to the flower field, as the pair of you return back to his car and slide back in your seats. He stays quiet as you resume the trip, slowly making your way back onto the freeway and towards your second motel. 

This kind of quiet is different than the previous silences the pair of you have grown to share over the past twenty-four hours. Unlike the comfortable moments of unspoken words, this is more tense. Like he knows something that you don’t. 

You don’t know what to say, or how to break that silence. You don’t know if perhaps you said something you shouldn’t have, or said something to make him uncomfortable. All of those thoughts are not pleasant ones. 

Jungkook stays quiet for most of the drive through the mountain. The music you have selected is loud enough that seems to drown the tense atmosphere, but the questions still press themselves deeply into your mind. What is he thinking about? 

And worse of all: did he know you were talking about him? 

You and Jungkook only speak a handful of times during the trip. He asks you if you need to use the restroom, if you’re hungry, and if you could play him your favorite anime openings. The pair of you have a handful of laughs about your mutual love for Haikyuu and Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, but most of the drive to the motel is ridden out in silence. 

The pair of you reach the hotel around dinnertime, definitely nowhere as exhausted as you had been the previous night, but just as eager to finally reach your destination. The tension between you and Jungkook has eased slightly, so you can only assume that perhaps he has overcome whatever was bothering him. You yourself have pushed the thought of Jungkook knowing the truth out of your mind. After all, if he had known, you assume he would have brought it up. Or at least called for an Uber to send you home. You assume you would have provided some sort of reaction for the two of you to talk about. But alas, those thoughts follow a conversation that has not happened, and will probably never happen, because you’re sure that you’ll never have to be in a situation that forces your feelings to go out of control once again—! 

“Hi,” Jungkook returns to the hotel clerk behind the desk, a girl to be about your age, who is flickering her gaze between you and Jungkook. A flicker in her eyes tells you that she already has multiple thoughts and assumptions about your relationship. “Do you have a room with two beds?” 

“Oh!” The girl blinks, momentarily looking taken aback. “Of course, let me check.” She turns her attention to the computer screen in front of her. Her eyebrows furrow together. “I’m sorry sir, we only have rooms with one bed available—either a full, queen, or king-size mattress.” 

Jungkook makes a noise in the back of his throat as he taps his credit card on the desk. Just watching from the side, you notice how he swallows, how he looks down, how his cheeks turn red. He turns to you after a moment. “D-Do you, uh, do you mind?” 

It takes you a second to realize what Jungkook is asking. He’s asking if you’d be okay with sharing a bed with him. Him: your college crush, the guy you never really lost feelings for. 

You turn red too. “U-Um…” You press your lips together and swallow. “S-Sure,” You manage, waving your hands out in front of you. “I-I don’t mind. I-If you don’t mind, of course.” 

“I-I don’t mind either.” Jungkook, however, looks like he’s about to combust. He looks a little lost again. He blinks once, twice, and seems to realize that he’s supposed to hand the woman behind the desk his card. “Uh, whichever room is the cheapest.” 

“That’ll be the room with the full-size bed.” She flickers her gaze between the two of you. “If that’s okay.” 

“O-Of course,” He stammers back, allowing the girl to take the card. He looks at you. “Do you mind staying here? I have to go to the bathroom real quick.” 

“S-Sure, go ahead.” A part of you wants to hit your head on the desk. What is happening to you? Why is the mere thought of sharing a bed with Jungkook turning you into a pile of mush? You’re a grown ass woman—! 

“So the two of you on vacation or something?” The woman behind the desk asks. She’s still in the middle of scanning Jungkook’s credit card. 

You try for a smile. “Kind of, we’re going to a friend’s wedding.” 

“I see, that sounds fun.” She smiles. “You know, I have to be honest, I was a little surprised he asked for two beds. You guys would make a cute couple.” 

At the label, you start to turn red. “O-Oh n-no, we’re not a couple at all. That’s very flattering, b-but yeah we’re not together.” 

“Oh, I know,” The girl rebuffs. Her smile looks more like a grin. She places Jungkook’s credit card on the desk, along with a receipt and a pen. “I hope the full size bed will change that.” She gives you a wink. 

You part your lips, unsure what to make of the situation. “What—!” 

“I’m back,” Jungkook says, sliding up from behind you and making you jump slightly. “What did I miss?” 

“Uh…” You wonder if your face is too red or not. It certainly feels that way. “Here!” You push him forward towards the desk. “She scanned your credit card. You just need to sign and we’ll be on our way.” 

If Jungkook notices the stiffness in your posture, he doesn’t comment as he leans forward to sign the receipt. Just over Jungkook’s shoulder is the worker, looking at you with a now shit-eating grin across her lips. Several questions ping through your mind, but you don’t get to ask any of those because Jungkook is turning around with his credit card in hand. 

“Uh, ready to get going?” 

“Sure!” You say, voice a few several pitches higher and you return to wanting the ground to swallow you whole. Jungkook leads the way out of the lobby, and you dare one last glance back towards the woman behind the counter. 

She’s waving a slip of paper in her hand. 

You turn back to Jungkook. “Hey Jungkook, give me a second. I think we forgot to grab something at the desk.” 

It sort of feels like a walk of shame to reach the worker behind the counter, who is still grinning at the sight of you and your internal struggles. She hands you the slip of paper, mouths something that makes you go red, before you’re turning back towards Jungkook. “Good luck,” She had whispered. 

Before you’re reaching Jungkook, you open the paper. At the very top is the WiFi password. 

Underneath the WiFi password, in what you can only assume is her handwriting, is one sentence. Fate said you guys only get one bed- don’t worry, I think he likes you too :-) 

“What was that about?” Jungkook asks. 

You shove the paper into your pocket. “The WiFi password,” You supply. 

The walk to the hotel room is quiet as Jungkook leads the way through the different hallways, corridors, and numbers on plaques. That tense silence is back as he guides the two of you, stopping only when he reaches the number that matches the one on the index card. He gives you a look, and inserts the card key into the slot. The door beeps, and he pushes open the door to find, true to the word of the lady behind the counter, one full-sized bed in the middle of the room. 

For the first few hours, it’s easy to ignore that full-sized elephant in the room. Jungkook takes out his laptop and you guys watch your favorite season of Haikyuu together—it’s season two—or you guys linger about on your phones. It isn’t until nighttime falls into your bones, into your minds, that you realize that you really need to address the new situation. 

“I’m gonna take a shower first, if that’s okay,” You say, already sliding off the bed to gather your belongings from your suitcase. Jungkook is humming along to the Haikyuu ending song, but he stops long enough to accept you taking the first shower. He watches you as you fish pajamas out from your suitcase. “Hey, Jungkook…” You start. “Are you sure you’re cool with this?” You gesture to the bed. “I can sleep on the floor. They give you extra bedding for a reason…” 

“What? No, of course not, I’m not letting you sleep on the floor.” He moves until his knees are pressed into the mattress. “And I’m cool with this. Promise.” He hesitates. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?” 

“Y-Yeah,” You manage, straightening into a standing position with your clothes in hand. “I don’t really move around when I’m sleeping. And I trust you, Jungkook.” You keep your gaze on each other until you break it first, turning around to step into the bathroom. 

You step out many minutes later, hair freshly washed and feeling much more relaxed than before. Jungkook has moved to the desk in the corner of the hotel room, typing away at some emails on his laptops. He does, however, whirl around upon hearing you exit the bathroom. The sight of you in your sweats, t-shirt, and damp hair makes his eyes linger. 

You merely tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You can go now,” You say quietly. 

Jungkook nods. “Thanks.” 

Breaking that eye contact again, you turn to the bed and lift the blankets to slide under the covers. You rest your head on the pillow, and immediately start to drift away. 

You are brought back after what only feels like a few minutes, when you hear a light switch turn off followed by the blanket next to you lifting up. You turn slightly towards the other side of the bed. “Jungkook?” You whisper. 

A stillness. “Ah shit, I’m sorry. I was trying to be sneaky.” 

“Mmm…” You mumble softly, turning your body 180 degrees in order to face him. You can vaguely make out the shadow of Jungkook’s outline. “Don’t worry. I’m a really light sleeper. Come on in.” 

There is a shift in the blankets until you feel the additional weight of Jungkook’s figure crawling in next to you. The knowledge that Jungkook is lying right next to you turns your blood hot both with anxiety and because Jungkook brings in a new wave of heat underneath the covers. For a cool spring night, it’s comforting. But also further anxiety-inducing. 

Jungkook shifts and even though the pair of you are on opposite sides of the bed, you can still feel the warmth radiating off his body. In the silence of the hotel room, you can hear Jungkook breathing. 

“Is this okay?” It’s Jungkook asking. His voice is quiet, soothing, and very close to your face. You realize that you guys are facing each other. 

Still, you have to give an answer. “Y-Yeah,” You reply softly. “Goodnight, Jungkook.” 

“Goodnight.” 

You turn onto your back. You try to go to sleep, you really do. But your heart is pounding, and rather than the blood filling your ears, it’s the sound of Jungkook’s breathing. 

“Y/N, you still awake?” Jungkook asks softly. 

You snort. “It’s only been a minute.” 

Jungkook smiles. “Sorry. I just… I have a question. A thought, actually.” 

“What is it?” 

“Well, okay, I don’t want to come off as arrogant or self-centered, but it’s just a question and just this thought that I have…” 

“Jungkook.” You turn back to face him. “You can ask me the question. I don’t mind.” 

“Well, alright.” Jungkook shifts. He’s a little closer now, you can make out the outline of his face. Everything looks slightly more defined now, definitely a result of your eyes adjusting to the darkness. “When you were talking about the guy you had a crush on… you know, when I asked if there was someone you were interested in while we were in college.” 

“Oh, I remember.” Your heart feels fuzzy, even though you have no idea what he’s going to ask you. 

“Okay, um. I guess I just wanted to know. Were you talking about me? 

The world seems to stop tilting on its axis—and all the consequences of that follow along. Everything around you slows to a grind: your heart stops in your chest, and all the air drains out of your lungs. You hold your breath, feeling as if your body has just been dipped underwater. Thousands of thoughts ping through your mind. You feel like that episode of Spongebob where all the file cabinets in your brain are catching aflame. You suddenly feel like you have no thoughts, but too many thoughts at the same time. 

Above all, one question rises above all the rest: how did Jungkook know? 

You’re so wrapped up in your thoughts that you don’t hear your name being called. It isn’t until you feel a hand at your shoulder do you jolt. “H-Huh?” 

“S-Sorry.” Jungkook sounds a lot more nervous now. “You weren’t responding.” 

“I… I was thinking,” You reply lamely. 

A pause. “What’s your answer?” Were you talking about me?

You swallow. Should you tell the truth? Or should you deny everything with the hopes that Jungkook will forget this conversation ever existed? 

The words spill out before you can think of a proper answer. “What if I was?” 

Jungkook is quiet for a moment. “Well…” He starts up again, inching forward towards you. Every move he makes is amplified in your ear, every squeak of the mattress and every rustle of clothing echoed in the small space that is your hotel room. “I’d be kinda frustrated, to be honest. Because when I was talking about my own crush, it might have been about you.” 

At Jungkook’s confession, the world seems to come crashing down on you as everything around tries to catch up to you. Immediately, you assume that perhaps you hadn’t heard Jungkook correctly, or maybe you’re completely misinterpreting what he’s trying to say to you. 

In a perfect world, maybe you’d say something witty and smart. Maybe you’d play along until he snapped. Maybe you’d be fluent in courting talk and understand exactly what he’s trying to say to you. 

But this isn’t a perfect world, and you are neither witty nor smart. You most certainly are not aware of flirtations. You need boys to be as straightforward as possible. Which is why you utter the most comprehensible: “What?” 

You feel a warmth at your hip—Jungkook’s hand against your skin. “Ahhhh.” Jungkook starts, not at all sounding fearful but rather casual. Still the underlying case of shyness, however, because this is still Jungkook. “I forgot you sometimes need simple things spelled out for you. Remember when you emailed our Arts History professor three times because you kept forgetting what font she wanted the assignment in?” 

You flush—Arts History was the class you and Jungkook were forced to pair up together for. Maybe you would have protested it more had you known Jungkook would turn out to be a little shit over it. “That was a one time thing! You’ve been bringing it up for as long as I’ve known you!” 

Jungkook giggles, pulling you closer so your face is against his collarbone and his chin rests on your shoulder. “Shh, okay, okay, I’m sorry.” 

Your face is burning at the feeling of your bodies so close together, your fingers pressed against his shirt and your nose against his skin. He smells like floral fabric softener. “Jungkook…?” You whisper softly, breath fanning his neck. 

Jungkook tilts his head to rest gently against your temple. He stays quiet for a moment, absorbing the moment. “If you did have a crush on me in college, it would be frustrating. Because I had a crush on you too.” 

This time it’s straightforward, just like how you’ve always wanted it. Why can’t you seem to reply? 

“Oh.” 

“I know.” 

You curl your fingers around Jungkook’s shirt. “What if…” You start slowly. “What if I said I still had those feelings?” 

Jungkook seems to think about his answer. “I’d say that I do too.” 

You swallow, nodding in a way that allows him to feel the movement. “Okay then.” 

Without a warning, Jungkook moves to curl his whole arm around your frame. This brings you even closer together. He noses your hairline. “Go to sleep,” He whispers softly. “We can talk about this tomorrow.” 

A part of you wants to say no—that holding off on confessions isn’t what happens in novels or tv shows or movies. But the larger part of you knows that you won’t be able to have a proper discussion like this when you are weak, tired, and vulnerable. Your heart stalls at his consideration, allowing yourself to be content just like this: asleep, cuddling with Jeon Jungkook as you’ve imagined since you first developed your crush. 

It’s much better than the fantasy. 

.

You wake up the next morning with Jungkook’s arms wrapped around you, his soft breathing against your neck and his lips dusting the skin of your neck. There’s a new kind of comfort you find being held like this, and a part of you wants to melt back into his arms. You think you can pretend to be asleep just to stay here a little longer, but the urgency you have to pee and get the day started becomes too pressing. 

Your previous assumptions of Jungkook being a heavy sleeper are confirmed as you manage to untangle yourself from him without so much as a whine from his end. By the time you finish with the bathroom, Jungkook is just beginning to push himself into a sitting position. 

You linger near the foot of the bed. “Good morning,” You greet, almost nervously. For good reason to—the memory of last night is vague but defined well enough where you aren’t sure what the next course of action should be. It’s not like your college ever offered a course about what to do when your crush admits to liking you back. 

Jungkook looks at you from across the bed. He gives you a small smile, a reassuring one. “Morning,” He says back. “How did you sleep last night?” 

You twist your hands together. “Pretty good, actually. How about you?” 

“Me too.” He adjusts his position so he can crawl over to you. He slides his legs over the side of the bed right next to you. He brings his hands towards you, palms up. Although he’s close enough to reach you, he doesn’t. Instead, he asks: “Can I?” 

You don’t say anything, you merely rest your hand in his. He tugs you towards him, stopping only when you’re standing between his legs. He still keeps his fingers curled around yours, turning your hand up to play with your fingers. 

He looks up at you, a soft smile across his lips. “Hi.” 

You smile back. “Hi.” 

He laces your fingers together, resting them between your bodies. “I guess now for the bigger question… how are you feeling?” 

You look down at your hands, deciding you like the way his larger hands cover yours. “H-How did you know I was talking about you?” You ask instead, looking over at him. 

Jungkook shifts his gaze away for a moment. “I don’t know,” He admits earnestly. “You were just looking at me back at the flower field and I had a feeling. And I really think a part of me was hoping you were talking about me.” 

Unable to help yourself, you feel the side of your mouth quirk up into a small smile. “What would you have done if I wasn’t talking about you?” 

He exhales in a laugh. “Honestly, I might have just driven out in the middle of the night and gone over a bridge or something.” 

You laugh, trying to diffuse your smile by pressing your lips but it only works so well. “I was really surprised to hear you liked me back.” 

“Of course!” He exclaims, looking momentarily shocked that you would feel this way. “I wasn’t messing around when I said you were smart, funny, and easy to talk to. That’s what made me really like you when we first met. Whenever we talked you just felt so real and approachable—like I could just be myself around you. And even now, seeing you after graduating and realizing you’re still all of those things. It just makes me like you more.” 

You feel your heart thumping wildly in your chest. You’ve never thought of yourself in the way Jungkook is describing you—you always just assumed that you were in the background, that you’d never be enough. 

Jungkook is looking at you, his eyes big and wide and full of truth. “Is that weird?” He asks. 

You shake your head immediately. “No, no it’s not weird at all.” You shrug a shoulder, giving him a meek smile. “It’s really sweet, actually.” 

Jungkook grins at that, heaving out a breath as a sign of his lowered defenses. “I think you’re sweet too.” 

You groan at that, throwing your head back as Jungkook breaks into a series of giggles. “You’re corny.” 

“You’re not complaining,” He points out. This is true. 

You shrug. “I guess that means I’m expecting us to catch up on three years of terrible flirting.” 

The smile slides off his face. “You’re right.” He brings your joined hands closer together until your whole body is standing closer to his. “Can I ask to kiss you?” 

The four letter K word makes your heart stutter in your chest once more. Your hands are so close to his chest that you can feel his own heart beating, and the thought of Jungkook being equally nervous for this gives you enough confidence to return his question. “Why don’t you ask and find out?” 

He smiles, a bunny smile that crinkles his eyes. “Touche. Can I kiss you?” 

You smile back. “Yes…” You whisper, leaning down just enough for Jungkook to crane his neck up in order to meet each other halfway. It’s just a closed-mouth kiss, a soft weight against your lips.

It’s one that Jungkook pulls away from before you can really enjoy it, really ponder asking for more. “Sorry,” He says immediately, pointing to his mouth. “Morning breath.” 

The pair of you stare at each other for a moment, before bursting out into laughter. That tense atmosphere is gone, replaced inside with that previously casual and comfortable air—as you step away from Jungkook and let him get his morning started. Except this time, the air is filled with open lingering stares, shy smiles, and Jungkook taking your suitcase wordlessly as you exit your hotel room. 

By the time you load into your car, it’s nearing noon and the gas tank in Jungkook’s car is almost empty. The pair of you agree in another champion’s breakfast—gas station food. 

“I swear, we’re both going to have terrible breakout tomorrow during the wedding,” You point out. Despite your words, you still tear into your Nacho Cheese Doritos with the aggression of a gorilla. “I’m going to photograph horribly. Irene will be so embarrassed.” 

“You photograph horribly? Inconceivable!” He says the word just as it is said in The Princess Bride, which makes you burst into another fit of laughter. 

The afternoon pans out the same way it has for the past two days. Jungkook drives onto the freeway, you decide the music, and the conversations fade in and out. Neither of you talk about the events of the previous night or of what happened in the morning—but the way Jungkook reaches out to laces your fingers together is more than enough. 

The town Jungkook has selected to stop for the evening is a five hour drive from the wedding venue—and it’s an actual city space this time, with restaurants and grocery stores and apartments. As soon as Jungkook tells you this information, you are bursting with excitement. It’s been two days since the pair of you actually stopped and lingered in a city environment and you miss it. 

It takes another whole day of driving to reach the city destination, as the first alert you get is the increasing number of cars that have joined you on the freeway. These more busy freeways guide you into the city, where you are greeted with the first sight of buildings, sidewalks, restaurants, and parking lots in days. 

Even though most of these landmarks are simple flashes that you and Jungkook pass through on the way to the hotel he has selected, you keep your eyes glued out of the window in order to take in as much of the surrounding area as you can. You continue to watch as the immediate high rises become more sporadic and spread out, until he’s finally pulling into the hotel. The sun is just setting behind the many buildings along the horizon. Lots of other cars are parked in the parking lot. You can hear other cars, buses, and trunks driving around the background—and you feel strangely comforted by this discovery. 

“Are you okay with sharing another bed today?” Jungkook asks as he guides the pair of you into the lobby. “I may or may not have called to make a reservation earlier when you were in the bathroom.” 

You laugh, feeling giddy at the thought of Jungkook taking the initiative to continue progressing your now slow-growing relationship. “Was that all they had left?” You ask teasingly as you make your way to the counter. 

Jungkook smiles down at you. “Perhaps I didn’t ask…” 

Your lips part. “Jungkook!” 

“What?” He’s laughing now. “I think I’m gonna bow out of any excuse to cuddle with you now that you’ve given me a taste of what that’s like?” 

You’re gasping in the midst of your laughter. “You’re terrible,” You manage. 

So Jungkook checks in—true to his word, he has reserved a single full-sized bed for the room. 

“Hey, so, I was thinking,” He starts as he’s following the map provided to him by the employee with directions about getting to his appropriate room. This hotel is slightly bigger than the off-the-road ones you and Jungkook pulled into, so it takes a little longer to find the room. After a few minutes of turning the map over, you two eventually find the room. 

“What’s up?” You ask as you push open the door and roll your suitcase into the space, with Jungkook following closely behind you. 

“Come here,” Jungkook requests gently, watching as you let go of your suitcase and make your way towards him. You move into his space easily, allowing him to hold you by the waist. “Since we’ve both admitted to missing out on three years of courting, flirting, and dating—I think we should go out to an actual restaurant to have an actual date.” 

You lean back slightly and give him a slightly shocked look. “Really?” 

“Yes!” He says. “Besides, someone has to put their foot down and say that eating only McDonalds and gas station hot dogs is not the right way to go.”

You laugh at that. “True, but we were having so much fun!” 

“Nope!” He exclaims, shaking his head. “The foot is going down, we’re going to an actual restaurant for dinner. Get changed, take a shower, whatever you need to do to freshen up.” There’s a finality in his words as he finally steps away from you, the smile of sweetness still on his lips. 

The restaurant Jungkook picks after scrolling through Yelp and other lists of recommendations is a corner Italian place that apparently serves the best Linguini and clams—a dish that you really enjoy. So you put something together much more presentable than your usual round of sweatpants and baggy t-shirts—replacing the sweatpants with black jeans and giving yourself a cream colored cropped sweater. It makes Jungkook’s eyes widen all the same. He’s clad in his usual black jeans and oversized coat that is perfect for the spring breeze. 

Since the restaurant is within walking distance of the hotel, you and Jungkook agree to chill off on the driving just enough to stretch your legs and actually have a walk for once—all while celebrating the final night of the road trip. 

“I was a little worried about this at first, to be honest with you,” You admit softly to Jungkook, long after the pair of you have been seated in a corner booth and have ordered your food. You’re circling the pasta noodles around your fork, and Jungkook is watching with a touch of amusement and adoration in his eyes. 

“Not gonna lie, so was I,” Jungkook returns back with an equally meek smile. 

You gape at him. “You invited me though!” 

“I did!” Jungkook exclaims with a laugh, looking down at his own order of food. “Me inviting you was honestly a spur of the moment thing. Me catching up to you, however, was me trying to be brave.” 

“You seemed pretty brave throughout most the trip,” You point out 

Jungkook shakes his head, situating his arms in a cross motion. “Nah dude that was just all a very well thought out facade. A part of me was expecting it to go terribly so I could at least walk away knowing that I built you up in my mind and the fantasy of that was better than the reality.” He must see the look of uncertainty casting a shadow over your mind because he immediately cuts back in. “Just so you know, the reality is much better than anything I could have conjured up.” 

You lower your chin slightly, staring over at Jungkook. You bring one shoulder up into a half-hearted shrug, maybe to showcase a certain level of carelessness. “What were you conjuring up then?” 

“Oh, I don’t know if you want to go there right now,” He rebuffs, looking a little red in the cheeks. “I think we should start slow. Refer to the PG thoughts, if you will.” 

You laugh, focusing your gaze momentarily on the last of your pasta. You had sorted through the clams, since they weren’t your favorite things to eat. “Jungkook, are you admitting to me that you have thoughts above PG?” 

“Oh shit, that wasn’t my intention!” 

You giggle. “I’m messing with you, Jungkook!” 

He pouts. “Don’t do that.” He rests his hand on the table, palm up, inviting for you to take it. “I just want to spend today with you, and take it slow—I just want to hold your hand and kiss you and lay with you and just be with you in the way I couldn’t be with you in college. Is that too weird?” 

You look down, pressing your lips together, trying not to squeal and definitely not trying to throw yourself off the chair. You look back over at him and squeeze his hand. “That’s not too weird at all. That’s actually really sweet. Honestly, those are things I probably would have asked for regardless. I don’t really know the rules of dating—I never really went out that often.” 

Jungkook smiles sweetly back at you, he brings your hands up to kiss the back. “I’ll give you a few pointers then, let’s get going.” 

After the check is paid for—it ends up being a split between the two, it’s the best compromise you can come up with considering he wants to take you out but you want to pay him back for driving this far—the pair of you emerge back into the city space. Jungkook’s hand is still wrapped around yours, using that connection point to pull you close to him. 

“Now this move,” Jungkook explains, beginning to lead you both back to your hotel room. “Is when the gentleman walks the lady home, because their date went by smoothly and he wants to see her for as long as possible.” 

You laugh. “I’m enjoying this so far.” 

The pair of you continue down the sidewalk, using the time it’ll take to walk back to the hotel to walk off the food in your stomach. You resume your conversation, giggling and laughing all the same until you’re walking through the lobby of the hotel and slowly making your way to your hotel room. 

Right before you step inside, Jungkook stops you. “Normally, the front door is where the gentleman drops the lady off, and they talk about how well the date went.” 

“Oh, well, in that case, this was so nice, Jungkook,” You remark, beaming at Jungkook’s own smile. “I’m glad you convinced me to eat real food for once.” 

“You’re welcome—I had fun too.” Jungkook slides closer to you. You, completely hypnotized by his next movements, watch as he cups your face with his hand to angle you upwards. “This is the part where we have a first kiss, because the stars are lined up for this. And because I really want to.” 

You smile, curling one of your hands around the wrist near your face. “Seeing as we’ve already had our first kiss, how about a second one?” 

Jungkook smiles back, eyes lidded towards your mouth. “I guess that’ll work.” His lesson on dating, it seems, is done, as he leans in to kiss you. You suck in a breath as he covers your lips with his. It’s deeper than the first time he kissed you—which had been more of a peck with a side of morning breath. But now you’re both awake, tasting like wine, and drunk off each other. It’s a more real kiss. 

You whimper as Jungkook’s tongue runs over your bottom lip, before slipping into your mouth. It’s a sensation you can get completely lost in, until Jungkook pulls away. 

Under the hallway light, you can make out his flushed cheeks, his wet lips, his dark gaze. 

Immediately, Jungkook is pulling you to his side before he starts digging through the pockets of his jeans. “Alright, we’re going inside right now.” 

You lean into his shoulder. “I thought I was supposed to invite you inside, Jeon? What happened to giving me pointers on first dates?” 

“Screw that,” He retorts, practically shoving the hotel door open. He turns around to face you. “Now, this is our hotel room. And I want to kiss you in private.” 

Your laughter is drowned out as Jungkook tugs you by the wrist into the room. 

.

Under different circumstances, waking up next to each other after a first date would hit you with a wave of anxiety and maybe even a vague sense of embarrassment at letting someone you like see you in such a vulnerable position. 

Right now, however, under the morning sunlight within the covers of your shared hotel bed, you just feel happy and content. You wake up on your side, with an arm resting over Jungkook’s chest and his fingers curling around your own. There is an immediate feeling of giddiness that overtakes you, because it’s hard for you to believe that this is happening. Someone you’ve liked and continue to like actually returning your feelings? That has always been such a foreign concept to you. 

You don’t know how long you continue laying in bed until Jungkook starts shifting next to you, signalling his wake. You watch as his eyes slowly peel open, laced with grogginess but still looking unfairly attractive that there are butterflies in your stomach. 

Jungkook lets out a sigh, as he looks down at you. A tired smile takes over his expression. “Morning.” 

“Good morning,” You reply back, voice soft and a little shy. “Happy wedding day.” 

That is true. Today is Irene’s wedding—an event you and Jungkook will arrive at in nearly five hours. There’s a strange sort of knot that is beginning to twist itself in your stomach, a knowledge that something good is coming to a close but a fear in the unknown as to what this would mean regarding your relationship with Jungkook. Neither of you have laid down groundwork for your relationship—if this even is a relationship to begin with. You may be inexperienced with this kind of stuff, but you’re sure that one date and making out on a hotel bed doesn’t immediately constitute an exclusive relationship. 

If Jungkook notices the tension in your form, he doesn’t say anything. He kisses your temple and grumbles something about wanting to get the day started. He mentions something about not having to worry about getting dressed for the wedding straightaway—that he has reserved a room at the hotel some of the guests of the wedding would be staying at, which is where you will be getting ready before the event. You nod, hearing pieces of his words, but a lot of it gets lost in your own thoughts. 

Is it okay to ask questions about where you stand with Jungkook? Is it foolish of you to even bother wondering? You’ve seen movies and have had conversations with friends about guys who dismissed questions like that as ‘moving too fast’. You don’t want to scare Jungkook off, but you also need to know that you’re not wasting your time.

You remain in bed, staring up at the ceiling as you sigh and try to organize through your thoughts. You also try to break down how the past three days have been. 

However, trying to do so proves to be a difficult challenge, as Jungkook’s phone starts buzzing excessively on his side of the nightstand—it seems like he is getting a series of text messages from someone. 

You know you shouldn’t be looking or prying, but the constant binging of alerts only eats at your nerves more. You turn in the bed towards Jungkook’s side, picking up the device to search for the silence switch along the sides. The screen, however, lights up and you immediately see a name you have not seen or heard since college. 

Jennie (9:53AM): hey jungkook !! just thought I’d ask where you want to meet up before the wedding starts 

Jennie (9:53AM): since we’re each other’s plus ones, I think we should show up together but idk let me know what you think 

Jennie (9:53AM): I’m excited to see you again and catch up, it’s been so long !! :) 

You freeze, feeling your body overload with information and questions come flooding into your mind. At first, you think you reread the message wrong. You think that maybe Jennie is texting the wrong person. But after the third or fourth time, you realize that this isn’t a dream. That Jungkook already has a plus one to the wedding, and it isn’t you. 

More than that, it’s Jennie. 

Jennie is also someone you went to college with, and someone that you only heard of between the grape vines and therefore is someone that is only vaguely recognizable. But you definitely know her. Jennie had been one of Irene’s friends, president of her sorority—and labeled some of the nicest people on campus. Even just from rumors and the one time you ran into her around the school, you can see it. Jennie is nice, beautiful, friendly, and outgoing. All the things you are not. 

And now, she’s Jungkook’s plus one to the wedding. And Jungkook did not tell you. 

Your lips part as your head starts to spin. Why didn’t Jungkook tell you he already had a plus one to Irene’s wedding? Maybe he did not owe you the explanation, and maybe you should never have assumed he’d be your plus one to the wedding. 

The thought of you assuming Jungkook would be your date to the wedding fills you with a vague mortification—why did you have to go ahead and assume? 

Your mind starts to spiral as you fall into the depths of overthinking. Now you were set to attend a wedding alone, with no plus one, and surrounded by people you don’t know. All while watching Jungkook sit with Jennie, eat with Jennie, and dance with Jennie. 

Holy fuck, holy fuck, what were you going to do? You can’t go to this wedding alone. You can’t confront Jungkook about this—you’re not even supposed to be touching his phone or looking through his phone. He would definitely be upset. How could he not be? 

At once, the tears collect in your eyes. How could this be happening? Seconds ago, you had been so content and happy, excited to attend this wedding with Jungkook. Seconds ago, you had been confident about your feelings, and Jungkook’s feelings in return. From all the kisses he showered you in, the date, the talking, the confessing—how could you not feel that way? 

Had Jungkook just been pulling your leg? After all, he did have three years to talk to you, to go out with you. Why hadn’t he said something sooner? Is he here right now: talking to you and laughing with you because he hadn’t found anyone and knows that you would do anything for him? 

In the background, you can vaguely make out the shower in the bathroom turn off, signalling Jungkook’s near completion with the bathroom. At once, it feels like you’re in a car that has enforced sudden breaks and has sent you flying against the dashboard—like you can’t breathe. 

Hastily, you rest Jungkook’s phone back on the nightstand and roll back over to your side of the bed. You blink quickly, trying to rid of the tears that have collected in your eyes while also trying to calm the lump in the back of your throat. 

Just as you’re starting to get a handle back on your feelings, the bathroom door opens and you can vaguely make out Jungkook’s humming as he exits. The fact that he sounds so carefree while you’re hurting only a handful of feet away almost makes the tears come back in. But you’ve learned how to hide your emotions well. 

Jungkook’s soft laugh brings you out of your thoughts. “Still in bed?” He asks jokingly, sitting on the edge and placing a hand on your ankle. You try not to stiffen at the gesture. “You know, even though we’re getting dressed at a different hotel, we still need to get going.” 

You take in a breath. “I’m comfortable here,” You exclaim, sitting up and facing Jungkook. He’s looking as wide-eyed, easy-going, and comfortable as always. You’re not sure how long you can keep up the facade of being okay. “I was just waiting for you, that’s all.” 

You don’t wait for him to reply as you slide off the bed, grab your clothes from your suitcase, and lock yourself in the bathroom. You ignore the lump in your throat as you brush your teeth, as you get your day started. Finally, you look up at your own reflection in the mirror. Unlike previous times, when there had been a glimmer to your gaze—you don’t know you recognize the now disheartened individual before you. 

You exit the bathroom and immediately turn to pack up your suitcase once more, ignoring Jungkook in the process. The boy is on his phone, typing something—probably a text message. Maybe he’s responding to Jennie, confirming their date for tonight, as he remains completely oblivious to your feelings. 

The thought brings the tears back to your eyes. 

“Ready to go?” Jungkook asks, all smiles and soft eyes as he slides off the bed to face you. 

You don’t look at him as you shoulder your carry-on bag and straighten into a standing position. “Yeah.” You don’t mean for the tone to come out dry and unresponsive, but you’re too focused on trying to get the tears out of your throat. 

You miss the way the smile slowly slips off Jungkook’s face as he watches you move towards the door. 

Jungkook moves towards you, reaching forward to take your suitcase from you just as he’s done for the past few days. 

You, however, brush him off. “It’s okay, Jungkook.” You pull open the door and make your way down the hallway without looking back to see if he’s following closer behind you. You don’t need his help, you don’t need his pity. You don’t need him to do these things, to lead you on—especially if he was going to end up with some other girl at then end of the day. 

You stay quiet as you make your way to Jungkook’s car. Jungkook steals the occasional glance in your direction, seeming to finally realize that something is wrong. 

He, however, doesn’t say anything until you’re back on the freeway—on the five hour drive towards the wedding venue. “Everything okay?” 

You’re playing with your hair, but you stop long enough to spare him a short glance. You’re not even looking at his face, you’re looking at the chair he’s seated on. “What do you mean?” 

Jungkook clears his throat. “You’ve been really quiet since I got out of the bathroom. You…” He gestures to the center console. “You’re not even playing any music.” He tries for a smile. “I’d really like to listen to your ‘everything’ playlist.” 

“Sorry, I’m not really in a music-listening mood right now,” You whisper, realizing that you should probably cover up your ass a little better than you are currently. “S-Sorry, I think it was something at the restaurant yesterday. I’m not feeling super hot right now.” 

“Oh no, do we need to stop by a pharmacy or something? I can run in and get some stomach machine or whatever—!” 

“Jungkook, it’s fine.” 

Maybe it’s the finality of your tone, or the sharper edge in your voice, but Jungkook quiets down again. One glance in his direction shows you the furrow of his eyebrows, the set of his jawline—he looks hurt and confused. And that kills you inside. 

A small part of you wants you just lay all your cards on the table—to admit your side of the story and let him know about the texts and the hurt feeling still eating itself at your heart. 

But another part of you, the bigger part of you, doesn’t want to give Jungkook that power. You don’t want to be the one to crack first, to be the one who gets hurt first. So you refuse to say anything, settling deeper and deeper into the seat of Jungkook’s car. Contrary to your initial thoughts, he doesn’t plug in his own phone to play his own music. He simply allows the pair of you to bathe in silence. 

Without the music to distract you, without Jungkook trying to make conversation, it forces your mind to linger on the events of the early morning. Maybe Jungkook didn’t tell you because it was obvious to him that the pair of you would never have been a plus one to the wedding in general. He’s probably hurt because Jungkook can’t get his way with you. 

The realization that he doesn’t even have the consideration to warn you ahead of time that an invitation for a ride doesn’t equate to an invitation to be a plus one brings the tears back to your eyes. Did you not even deserve a warning? Why would Jungkook let you kiss him, let you fall in love with him—only to turn his back on you like this? 

You have to keep your eyes glued to the window of the passenger’s side of the car, just to make sure Jungkook won’t see the tears. You can just imagine that he’ll ask, and the conversation will steer the pair of you into an even more awkward space. 

It’s a very agonizing five hours. Not having that time to recover from the shock of those texts is becoming increasingly more difficult for you to handle. 

There are a few times that your tears overwhelm your whole system, where you have to sniff to get a handle on your body’s response to the emotions going through your body—which you’re sure Jungkook can hear. After all, there’s no music playing and there is a silence that is threatening to swallow you whole. 

Jungkook, however, does not say anything in response to your very obvious sniffle. He merely tightens his grip on the steering wheel, and keeps his mouth shut. You wonder if he’s waiting for you to talk first, to explain what’s going on with you. 

The sky is bleeding orange by the time Jungkook pulls into the new hotel, the final hotel. There is still two hours until the wedding is set to start, but every nerve in your body is screaming for you to leave and go back home. Every nerve in your body is telling you that you don’t belong here anymore. 

“Okay, I let you have your peace for the whole drive over,” Jungkook starts off, voice tight, fixing the car into park. “But I’m asking you this right now. Are you sure you’re okay? You don’t seem fine… and I’m worried about you…” He reaches across the car to land a hand on your shoulder. It’s a completely normal gesture, especially between you and Jungkook, but you cannot handle it. 

You jerk away. “I’m fine,” You snap out, actually fixing your gaze on him this time. Jungkook recoils, immediately retracting his arm from you, looking like you just burned him. You tear your gaze away from him. You’re not strong enough to see him hurt because of you. “Why do you care anyways?” 

Jungkook exhales in disbelief, turning towards the steering wheel of the car and running a hand through his hair. “What are you talking about? Is this about last night? Did I… say something to scare you off?” 

“This isn’t about what you said, this is about what you didn’t say and what you’re not telling me!” 

Jungkook looks like you just grew a second head. “What are you talking about?” 

You whirl back to face him. “Oh, so the fact that you and Miss. Jennie were already set to go to this fucking wedding together and you didn’t even think to give me a heads up and tell me?” 

Jungkook freezes like a deer in headlights. “What? How did you know about that?” 

You laugh, but it’s a hollow noise that only makes that lump come back to your throat. “Nevermind,” You bite out. This time, you don’t stop the tears from resurfacing as you give Jungkook a full look this time. His demeanor changes from frozen to pained at the sight. “I hope you guys are very happy together.” 

You don’t say another word as you fumble with the latch of the door before pushing it open with more strength than necessary. You can vaguely hear Jungkook struggling with his own seat belt, but you don’t care. You slam the car door shut and storm away. You don’t know where you’re going—maybe around the corner to scream, or to call a taxi that’ll take you to the airport. You don’t care about the wedding. You don’t think you could face the embarrassment in facing Jungkook or Jennie or Irene right now. 

“Shit, Y/N! Y/N!” Jungkook is calling for you now, his footsteps loud against the asphalt. 

Everything feels like you’re going through water, which is probably why Jungkook is able to reach you as quickly as he does. He catches you by the wrist. 

“Y/N—please, will you stop and just listen to me?” 

“No! Jungkook, let me go.” You start trying to tug your wrist, trying to pull yourself away from him. “Let me go! I’m leaving! I don’t want to see you anymore!” You’re gasping, the tears blurring your vision and making you feel powerless. 

Without a warning, Jungkook pulls you in his arms. Wrapping his arms around you, he traps you in his embrace. And you are miserable. 

“Stop it!” You gasp, trying to push him away. You’re heaving—crying and trying to escape from someone as strong as Jungkook is definitely a workout for your body. “Jungkook, leave me alone. This is all my fault.” 

He pauses. “What do you mean?” 

You stop struggling, allowing Jungkook to hold you as you pull back enough to look away from his face. You wipe at the tears on your face. “It’s my fault anyways. I said I liked you and you said you liked me too, but maybe that wasn’t enough for you. Just because we like each other doesn’t mean we’re exclusive. I should have asked up front, so I wouldn’t get hurt in the long run.” 

“You don’t need to get hurt though,” Jungkook whispers kindly, his voice overcoming the blood in your ears, as well as your own yelling. You quiet down at that, except for your own lungs contracting to catch more air. This leaves you a hiccuping mess. He waits until he knows you’re not going to say anything next. “You’re right, okay? Jennie and I were supposed to be each other’s dates.” 

You’re still trying to catch your breath. 

Jungkook rests a hand on top of your head, curling his fingers through the strands of your hair soothingly. “Are you okay?” 

You hiccup. “Why are you telling me this? I just told you that I’m hurt right now…” 

“Shhh.” Jungkook pulls back and cups your face in his hands so you can look at him. “You aren’t listening to me. I said we were supposed to be each other’s dates. We’re not anymore.” 

You blink, allowing the tears that were already filling your eyes to fall down your cheeks. Jungkook wipes them gently with his thumb. “What?” 

Jungkook’s gaze flickers between your eyes. “Jennie and I are friends, so we’d figure it would be fun to just go together and have a person to sit with, eat with, and dance with. As friends.” 

“W-What happened then?” You ask, a watery color in your voice. 

Jungkook gives you a gentle smile, the kind of gesture that tells you that you should know the answer already. “You happened, silly.” He keeps his eyes on yours. “I saw you at the party with Jimin and invited you to come with me. I assumed when I asked that we’d be each other’s plus ones. I forgot to tell Jennie though when I asked you out.” He tilts his head at you. “You saw the texts on my phone, didn’t you?”

“I-I’m sorry.” You hiccup again. “Your phone kept going off this morning and I was just trying to put it on silent. I-I didn’t mean to look through your messages…” 

“Shh, baby, you’re good, you’re okay.” Jungkook interrupts gently, wrapping his arms tighter around you and swaying the pair of you back and forth. The usage of the nickname fills you with a new feeling, a warmer feeling. It helps calm you down. 

Your breathing eventually evens out, bringing you back to reality and to the realization that you and Jungkook are hugging in the middle of a hotel parking lot. 

Jungkook loosens his grip on you, letting you step back. He watches you for a moment. “Here,” He says, digging through his pocket and pulling out his phone. “I think you should see this.” He clicks through a few of his apps, until he seems to find what he’s looking for because he hands the phone to you. You look over at him, confusion flooding through your features. Jungkook gives you a reassuring nod. “It’s okay.” 

Still hesitant, you take the phone and look at the messages across the screen. It’s the texts from this morning. 

Jennie (9:53AM): hey jungkook !! just thought I’d ask where you want to meet up before the wedding starts 

Jennie (9:53AM): since we’re each other’s plus ones, I think we should show up together but idk let me know what you think 

Jennie (9:53AM): I’m excited to see you again and catch up, it’s been so long !! :) 

Jungkook (10:20AM): hey Jennie !! oh shit i totally forgot to let u know but i actually found a plus one :( i’m soooo sorry i should have told you earlier omg i feel terrible 

Jennie (10:20AM): no worries jungkook !! who is it omg do I know them? 

Jungkook (10:20AM): it’s actually Y/N? We all went to college together… 

Jennie (10:20AM): OH!!!! wait isn’t she the one Irene was working with a lot for senior projects? 

Jennie (10:20AM): OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO

Jennie (10:21AM): OKAY JUNGKOOK I SEE U 

Jennie (10:21AM): she’s THE Y/N right???? the one u were in love with for our entire college career?? 

Jungkook (10:22AM): …… maybe? 

Jennie (10:22AM): WOWOWOWOW good for u Jungkook !!! glad to see u finally having the balls to ask her out !! 

Jungkook (10:22AM): OKAY THAT’S ENOUGH 

Jungkook (10:23AM): I actually felt BAD for leaving you by yourself BUT NOT ANYMORE 

Jennie (10:23AM): LMAO Jungkook I’m friends with Irene’s entire bridesmaid row i’ll be fine 

Jennie (10:23AM): just go get ur dick wet!!!!!! 

Jungkook (10:23AM): istg i will leave you on read 

Jungkook (10:23AM): also that is NOT the point!!!!!! Just wanna love my new girl :( 

Jennie (10:24AM): You’re gross 

Jennie (10:24AM): but sounds good see you tonight! 

You look up from Jungkook’s phone to see him watching you carefully, gauging your reaction, pleading for you to forgive him. 

The only thought that can be translated into a coherent sentence comes out: “You were in love with me during college?” 

Jungkook exhales in a laugh, his arms finding your waist once again. “I think ‘in love with’ was a bit of a stretch back then. I think you could agree that we didn’t know each other well enough before for me to say that.” 

You’re still looking at him. “Back then…?” You echo. 

He nods. “Back then.” He brings you closer, one hand moving up to gently brush at the skin of your cheek. “But it’s different now. Now, I can say with absolute certainty that I’m in love with you.” 

Your lips part. “You’re in love with me?” The tears spring back into your eyes, but for a different reason entirely. The emotional rollercoaster you have just been on is unbelievable. 

Jungkook’s eyes widen at the sight of your tears. “Oh shit, I’m sorry! Is that too fast? I’m sorry, I should have given you a warning or something. Or more time at least. Oh no, please don’t cry…” 

You brush him off with a watery laugh, waving his concern away. “It’s okay Jungkook. This is fine, really.” You give him a smile. “I love you too. I really thought you were pulling my leg or something.” 

Jungkook gives you his own small smile. “I’m sorry. I should have brought this up sooner about us being each other’s plus ones. Just because I assume something doesn’t mean it’s an established thing.” He brings you closer, his smile turning into a grin. “You love me too, huh?” 

You giggle. You’re too strung out to come up with something witty or clever. “Yeah…” 

Jungkook is still smiling, his gaze switching between your lips and your eyes. “I’m gonna kiss you now.” 

You nod. “About time.” 

He kisses you again, softly and sweetly, tongue slipping past the seam of your lips but it’s gentle caresses that make your heart feel like it’s crawling up your throat. 

“OH MY GOD GET A ROOM!” A voice calls from the other side of the parking lot, forcing you and Jungkook to pull away. The pair of you look at each other and you start to laugh. 

Jungkook kisses your forehead, sweeping down to your ear. “How about we check into our room and get ready?” 

You giggle, nodding over at him. “That sounds good.” 

So Jungkook leads the way, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as you gather your suitcases from the car and enter the lobby. You check in easily, as Jungkook is provided a map with directions on how to reach the room. 

The pair of you don’t pull away once until Jungkook is sliding the key card into the door and pushing it open to reveal the bedroom you’ll be sharing for the night. 

Both you and Jungkook park your suitcases near the foot of the bed, as per usual. 

“Do you want to use the bathroom?” Jungkook offers. 

You nod, smiling softly. “Okay.” 

You gather the dress you’ve brought in your arms, about to enter the bathroom, before Jungkook’s voice stops you. “Hey,” He calls, approaching you and wrapping you in his arms again. He’s much more handsey this time, like he needs to make sure you’re not going to run away again, like you’re going to be okay. “You feel better now?” His thumb brushes your lips. “Your eyes are still a little red.” 

You nod. “The makeup will probably help that,” You reassure in a soft voice. 

Jungkook mirrors your movements. “Still, how about I get some ice for you so you can put something cold underneath your eyes… to stop the puffing.” 

He looks genuinely concerned and worried for your wellbeing that you can’t help but smile. Since he is insisting, you decide to just let him be. “Okay, Jungkook.” 

He smiles. “Okay! You start getting ready and I’ll get the ice, okay?” A quick kiss on your cheek before he’s bounding out of the door with the provided ice buckets. 

Your eyes linger on the door for a few minutes before you’re turning back to your suitcase. The dress you have picked is a pink flowing floor-length number—something Karly helped you pick out before leaving. It’s soft enough that it doesn’t leave crease marks along the fabric, which had made this outfit perfect for the trip. You take the dress and your bag of makeup before entering the bathroom. You’re just slipping on the dress when you hear the hotel room door open and close. 

“Okay, I got the ice!” Jungkook announces through the bathroom door. “Did you want to work on your eyes right now?” 

“Sure,” You call back. “Do you mind zipping me up first?” 

“Of course,” Jungkook returns, sounding distracting as you open the door to the bathroom. You peek your head through, noticing Jungkook opening his suitcase on the floor and sorting through it—probably for his own suit. 

He must hear the door open, because he looks up towards you. Immediately, his eyes widen as he straightens up into a standing position. “O-Oh wow…” He’s looking you over up and down, up and down, as if he needs to commit this to memory. “Y-You look great. Beautiful.” 

“Really?” You stammer back. “Thank you.” 

Jungkook keeps his eyes on you as he approaches you. “You needed me to zip you up?” 

“O-Oh right, yeah.” Hastily, you turn around, brushing the hair from your back to expose your undone zipper, and your bare back. 

You think that he purposely grazes the tips of his fingers against your skin in his process of bringing the zipper up to the top of the fabric. You’re about to turn, thank him, but his hands back at your waist do the gesture for you. “Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome. You look really pretty.” 

You pout. “You’re being too nice to me.” 

Jungkook whines, hugging you close to him. “You’re too cute.” He noses at your temple. “I just wanted to see you smile.” He pulls away after a moment. “Let’s take care of your face, yeah?” He turns around and returns with a small baggy full of ice. “Here, sit down for a second.” He leaves for a second, returning back with a towel. “Maybe… five minutes each eye. I don’t know. I’ll get ready while we’re waiting.” 

So he takes his suit out from his case and disappears into the bathroom, leaving you alone with a towel of ice pressed against your eye. The cooling sensation definitely helps with the puffiness. 

Jungkook appears from the bathroom a few minutes later—dressed in a black suit with a white button-down and a long skinny black tie. His hair has been fiddled with a little, but he still has that messy, boyish, lovable appearance that makes your heart race. 

“Did you switch the towel?” 

You nod. 

“How do you feel?” 

Slowly, you bring the towel down and rest it on your lap. You look at Jungkook. “How do I look?” 

He leans forward towards you, holding your chin gently between his fingers. “You look better. Did you need to finish getting ready?” 

“Yeah. I just need to touch up my makeup.” 

“Okay, go ahead then.” 

Jungkook takes the towel, and watches as you make your way back to the bathroom. You’re only gone for a few minutes before you’re emerging once more—eyeshadow a little darker, lashes a little closer, and lips slightly pinker, but overall still looking like the same version of the girl he fell in love with. 

The pair of you drive to the wedding venue, a cute brick building with browns, greens, and whites surrounding. Guests already swarm the outside area, some of whom you recognize from college. The sight makes you nervous. 

Jungkook sees this, and he reaches over to grab onto your hand. “You can just stick with me, okay?” He smiles. “I’ll protect you.” 

You roll your eyes, but you are thankful to have Jungkook as your source of comfort and be that person you could run back to. 

He parks and meets you at the front of his car, where you lace fingers and make your way towards the venue. You go through a small round of hellos and ‘nice to finally meet you’ conversations—most notably from Mingyu and Jennie, both of whom light up at the sight of your presence. Contrary to your previous worries, you find that you don’t really need to be so nervous. Mingyu and Jennie are friends of Jungkook’s for a reason—they radiate a relaxing nature that you can tell is what has drawn the three of them to each other. 

They ask about you, your college experience, your current experience, passing easy conversation in the ceremony space right before the start of the wedding. It’s fun to see Jungkook joking around with the friends he grew up with, and even more fun to see how easy you are allowed into that world. 

The actual wedding ceremony is a blur. You vaguely recognize the extremely attractive, excited, and watery-eyed version of Seokjin at the head of the aisle. You definitely recognize the equally as attractive, excited, and watery-eyed version of Irene, downed in white lace and looking much more beautiful than you ever remember her. Vows are exchanged, kisses are shared, there’s an applause, and pictures are taken before the guests are ushered into the main entry room—decked out with a bar and a few scattered seating areas. Jungkook whispers to you that guests are put here temporarily, as the ceremony space is being converted into a dining area. 

True to Jungkook’s promise, he lingers by your side most of the night. Although you reassure him that you are fine, you are much more emotionally stable compared to a few hours ago, and that perhaps you are okay catching up with Nayeon—another girl from college, actually someone from the first party you ever attended who defended you when you were receiving unwanted attention—but Jungkook simply tells you that he likes being around you. He likes being able to put his arm around you, likes to rest his hand at your waist, likes people knowing that he has you. 

It’s a few more minutes of conversation, of laughter, of old stories being exchanged between people you haven’t seen for years, when the guests are called back into the newly converted dining area. Instead of rows of chairs lined up, there are round tables filling the space. The long panel of doors once closed along the wall of the room have been opened—exposing a gazebo with a D.J. and a dance floor, all encircled by a string of big bright fairy lights. 

You and Jungkook are situated at the same table as most of the guests you recognize from college. You assume this is purposefully done to give you all a common ground, and it works because conversations spring easily between you all. Even when you’re not talking about your experiences from university, you’re able to transition from topic to topic. You and Jungkook occasionally talk amongst yourselves as you’re eating, but you sit together and laugh together when Irene and Seokjin emerge and listen in during the wedding toasts. 

Finally, Irene and Seokjin make their rounds through the room, stopping at the tables to cheer and laugh and exchange a few words of congratulations and conversation. Following this process, everyone at your table stands on their feet as Irene and Seokjin make their way towards you. There are bright smiles, Irene’s cheerful gasp as she takes in all the guests that have come to join her. She circles your table, hugging every guest, continuing this when she reaches you. 

Irene grins at the sight of you. “Y/N! Oh my gosh, it’s been so long!” 

“I know!” You return, pulling away from Irene. “Congratulations. This wedding is beautiful.” 

She beams, absolutely radiating in her white dress and glittering makeup. “Thank you so much for coming! But oh my god, are the rumors true, did you really show up—!” She looks over your shoulder, and grins again. “Jungkook!” She hugs Jungkook. “I should be saying congratulations to the two of you. I was surprised to get the text from Jungkook saying that you guys were coming as each other’s dates. Gave me a whole pain because I had to switch some seats around at the last minute. But anything for my favorite people.” She turns to you and holds onto your arms. “Jungkook has had a crush on you for years, so you’re really doing him a huge favor.” 

“Okay, enough,” Jungkook interrupts, scowling. But there is still that playful look in his eyes. “Did all your friends know about this? Jennie knew something was up too when I texted her.” 

Irene presses her lips together. “Mingyu might have mentioned something.” She presses her hand to Jungkook’s cheek. “Stay safe, you guys. Hope you enjoy the rest of the night.” She moves onto her next guest. 

Jungkook is groaning. “Remind me to never tell Mingyu anything ever again.” He glares at the boy from across the table. “Gonna fling some peanuts at that son of a bitch.” 

You laugh, wrapping your arms around Jungkook’s waist. “Oh, let him be. It’s Irene’s wedding. You can get him tomorrow.” 

Jungkook pouts, but he does wrap his own arm around your shoulder. “Ah, love my girl—promoting evil behavior after festive events.” He kisses your cheek as your table takes their seats once more. 

The good natured atmosphere continues as you and Jungkook down your food, remaining fully engaged in the conversations happening around the table. After another hour of this, the DJ announces the start of the married couple’s first dance. Irene and Seokjin take to the dance floor and spin around, her white dress flowing around the room like light. Underneath the glow of the fairy lights, it looks like the couple is in an entirely new world. And you are so taken by it. 

Jungkook does not turn to you until the DJ plays a slow song—a first slow song after a series of upbeat dance and pop genres. He jerks his head towards the dance floor. “You want to dance?” 

You take his hand when he offers. “Of course.” He leads you across the room, towards the gazebo, where several other couples have moved to cling to one another. Jungkook pulls you in: one hand on your waist and the other with your own hand. “This is really nice,” You start off. 

Jungkook laughs. “The wedding, or the dance?” 

You smile over at him. “Both. Being able to slow dance with you, however, is marginally better.” 

Jungkook is quiet for a little after that. He seems content just staring at your eyes, taking in the magic of this moment. “Thank you for coming with me,” He starts. “The whole road trip thing. Definitely would not have been as fun if I did all that by myself.” 

“Well, thank you for inviting me,” You return. “Even though we had that big misunderstanding. I had a lot of fun.” 

“Hey.” Jungkook angles his head a little so he can look at you in the eyes. “You know that I would never hurt you, right? You’re too important to me that I wouldn’t even think to pull some stupid shit like that again. You know that I love you too much to do that to you, right?” 

“I do know now,” You say, gazing over at him. “And I love you too.” 

You’re not usually an expressive person. But it’s worth saying those words just to see the grin that overtakes Jungkook’s face. It’s worth even more when he leans forward, kissing you openly in front of all his friends, nibbling gently at your bottom lip, running his tongue over the wound, and into your mouth. It’s worth it to have his fingers dusting sweetly over your skin, coaxing your mouth to open to allow exploration. 

It feels like worlds pass before Jungkook pulls away, giving you that breathless smile dimple and all, before he’s leaning forward to bury his face into your neck. 

“I think the drive home will be fun,” Jungkook mutters softly. 

“Hm?” You hum, eyes closed as he presses tiny kisses along your neck. 

“Most definitely,” Jungkook says, lifting himself just enough so that his lips hover over your ear lobe. “Because I plan on fucking you in every hotel bed for the rest of the trip.” 

You feel your heart race, your cheeks heat. Yes, this was definitely worth it. 

[dear-wormwoods]

headcanons on the main four's relationship with girls (romantically, platonically, etc.)?

Hmmmm... okay let's see...

Stan:

- It seems like he's pretty much gotten over his puking thing when it comes to Wendy, so I can't really see him being super nervous around girls when he's older. I do think he'll try hard to act 'cool' around girls he likes (basing this on the way he initially wouldn't act the 1864 part in Super Fun Time because Wendy would see).

- Platonically, he seems to get along fine with the girls. He's respectful of their whole deal in The List and plays with them/is impressed by them in Board Girls. So I think, when it comes to friendship, he'll grow up not necessarily seeking out friendships with girls, but he won't see them any differently than guy friends.

- That being said, when he IS attracted to a girl, he'll want approval from his friends and have moments of talking about her in kind of an objectifying way (like the buttcrack incident in Bass to Mouth) because... well, Stan can be kind of a dick sometimes.

- However, he takes the concept of love really seriously and while he might mess around some in high school, I don't think he'd really feel good about it unless there are real feelings there.

- He and Wendy date on and off throughout middle school, but ultimately break up in eighth grade because he's tired of feeling like a project and she wants more passion and maturity. It's amicable though, and they stay on good terms.

- Stan has a few girlfriends in high school, but nothing too serious, and each relationship ultimately fails because he can't give them the same kind of time and energy he gives to Kyle and it's noticeable to everyone except for him.

- He's always kind of popular with girls, because he's really conventionally attractive, but he sucks at recognizing when a girl is flirting vs. just being nice, so he misses out on a lot of opportunities for dates just because he's a dumbass.

- When he and Kyle are in different states in college, he has one serious girlfriend who he thinks might be 'the one', and she fits his type profile - smart, feisty, passionate, political - but he finds himself comparing her to Kyle a lot and starts to realize he might be trying to fill a void and it's time to seriously examine how he feels about his best friend.

Kyle:

- I have some thoughts on Kyle's previous crushes. First, I don't think he actually liked Heidi that way, I think he related to her and wanted to help her and confused that with having a crush because the other girls told him that's what it was. With Leslie, he didn't know anything about her, he just wanted to help her and, again, equated that with liking her. As for Nichole, he's so starved for acknowledgement that he instantly 'liked' her, despite again knowing nothing about her initially, just because she offered to listen to him. And finally, Rebecca, who he liked basically because she's really smart and he's not used to being around other intellectuals. Kyle's crushes tend to fade away quickly or stop abruptly when the girl doesn't live up to his expectations of romance.

- In the show, he likes relating to girls on an intellectual or emotional level, but doesn't like physical attention from them - he is offended by Rebecca's sudden physicality after their initial kiss, and is grossed out and confused by Bebe's attention in Clubhouses because it's purely physical. Throughout the series, he never comments on girls' bodies or appearances outside of like, saying a girl has nice eyes in The Hobbit as the reason why she's 'hot', and places a lot of value on emotional connection and love. And yeah, part of that is due to being a kid, but considering how the other boys act there's definitely something different about Kyle's relationship with relationships.

- That all being said, I think Kyle will continue to have brief crushes throughout elementary and middle school, sometimes just as a way of fitting in because he feels left behind by the other boys, and sometimes confusing feelings of identification with having a crush. Each of these crushes will fade or end when he fails to develop a real emotional connection on par with how deeply he cares about Stan and/or whenever he feels pressure to do anything more than chaste kissing.

- He does, however, feel extremely validated when girls have crushes on him. He has low self esteem and wants to be liked, so if a girl shows even the slightest bit of interest it will make him super happy. Not because he likes her back (though he'll think that's what's happening at least up through middle school), but because his self worth really hinges on what other people think of him. If The List proves anything, it's that. And it's dumb, too, because he IS very good looking, he just can't see it himself.

- By the time high school rolls around, Kyle starts thinking there's something 'wrong' with him because he's not interested in getting to any bases with anyone like so many of the other boys are. He can't relate at all to Kenny and Butters trying to hook up with girls, and doesn't get how guys like Clyde can just date girls based purely on physical appearance. He hasn't had a crush on a girl since middle school, but he's pretty sure he's not gay because he doesn't think about boys that way either beyond wanting to be close to Stan at all times (but that's not something he's ready to read into much).

- At some point in high school he comes out privately to Stan and Kenny as ace, but that label doesn't feel entirely right. It's the closest thing he knows about at the time, though, so he uses it for the rest of high school and part of college. Eventually he settles on labeling himself as demi, though. I have more thoughts about Kyle's sexuality journey, but it's not really related to your question because it doesn't involve having any girlfriends, so I'll leave it for another time. Mostly I just think his physical attraction has a prerequisite of deep emotional connection, and he just won't happen to find that with any girls though he never really rules it out as a possibility.

- Platonically, he gets along well with girls. He respects them, wants to bridge the gap between boys and girls, and doesn't find it difficult or off putting to have conversations with them. I can see him developing real friendships with girls, especially later on in college when he's able to branch out beyond the kids he's spent his entire life with.

Cartman:

- Cartman will basically have no game up through high school. All the girls he's grown up with think he's disgusting and every single one of them remembers how he treated Heidi, so they'd never stoop so low as to date him. Try as he might to manipulate someone into being with him, he just can't do it.

- But of course he pretends to be just as experienced with girls as the other boys, so every story anyone else has about hooking up is met with a 'oh yeah? well I did that first' from Cartman.

- He and Wendy do eventually hook up in like Senior year, but it's a secret because she's so ashamed of being attracted to him, and he's already lied so many times in the past that when he inevitably brags to everyone about it, no one believes him.

- He's also obsessed with Kyle during all of this, and although pretty much everyone knows about it, he denies having any attraction to guys. Despite being very, very bisexual, Cartman will claim to be straight for years to come.

- After he leaves South Park, he's actually really successful in the dating world. He's a handsome guy and very charismatic, and he's great at love bombing and manipulation, so he's very adept at using Tinder (and, secretly, Grindr) to get dates. Most of the time his hookups end with a very unsatisfied woman or man taking an Uber home after he finishes and falls asleep, but sometimes he can sink his claws in long enough to manipulate a girl into actually dating him. His relationships are disastrous because he's, y'know, an abusive asshole, but he has plenty of them.

- I can't decide if Cartman will ever get married. I think he'd want to, if only to have a woman around to take care of him and also to control, but at the same time I think he'd assume everyone is just after his money. If he does get married, it will be to someone like Liane. He'd make her sign a prenup, and naturally he'd regularly cheat on her but expect her to be completely devoted to him, and then grow to resent her if she ever asks for anything in return from him.

Kenny:

- Kenny's a hard nut to crack because he's so sexually motivated for so much of the show, but he's also such a nice person that it's hard to imagine him just using girls for sex. I do think that he'll have a lot of 'firsts' before the other boys do, especially considering what he's already done in canon. But I don't think he'll be as casual about it as a lot of people imagine he would be.

- During middle school Kenny will likely be really insecure about his looks, his financial situation, and his family, and will probably think that girls wouldn't want to date him because he's skinny and has nothing to offer the way like, Clyde can offer shoes. But in reality, lots of girls like him because he's cute and sweet.

- I think Kenny will have a lot of girlfriends throughout school and as an adult, but I don't think any of his relationships will be super serious emotionally. I think he'll hold his cards close to his chest and will hold girls at arm's length because he won't want to put them through any grief when he inevitably dies, even if they won't remember it.

- I also think Kenny will find it increasingly difficult to relate to people in general, which not only makes dating hard but maintaining his friendships too. I think he'll be kind of a loner as an adult because of this. He'll have casual friendships and relationships, but nothing deep.

- Despite this, I think he'd get along very well with girls, not just in a dating sense but also as friends. I do like the idea of Kenny exploring his gender identity, maybe even coming to the conclusion that he's genderfluid, and I think making more girl friends would be part of that.

- Being super nice and easy to talk to, Kenny will end up with a lot of knowledge about girls and their thoughts and feelings. And he'd be trustworthy too, so he'd never gossip about them to each other or to the boys.

And that's really it, hopefully it all makes sense!