#and getting through winter wont seem so hard

[indecisive-dizzy]

thinking about Julie going into hibernation, but also how she was participating in winter activities and was at the Homewarming party.

obv an in-universe excuse is writing inconsistency within the show but nahh. i wanna get sad.

My headcanon is that Julie begins hibernation after the Homewarming party. Right after. And later in the evening it turns into a different party, Julie's Goodnight Party (name in progress).

It's fun, because any party with this rainbow monster's name in it is gonna be fun! but there's an underlying somberness. They eat, play games and talk about everything and anything like the Homewarming party, but it just feels different.

(continues below, sad warning bc I made myself sad)

When Julie starts getting sleepy, the party ends with her neighbors giving their farewells, goodnights, and big hugs.

Frank is the one to walk her home, of course. He brushes Julie's hair, makes sure her and her nest has everything she needs, and stays with her as she falls asleep. But not before they share a big, comforting, long hug filled with every unspoken "I'll miss you" and every ounce of love they can pour into it.

It's the longest Frank has ever hugged anybody. "A hug long enough to get him through winter," according to Julie.

He wished that were true.

Either way he smiles, he smiles for Julie as it's the last expression she sees before finally closing her eyes to sleep.

The tears that later soaked into his pillow are the only secret Frank's ever kept from his best friend.

[leviathanleva]

Sugar Bomb

Pairing: Findlay 'Hazard' Docherty x Fem!Reader

Description: After months of dancing around each other, you and Hazard come to one last draw before your inevitable departure.

[3.7 k words]

Chapter 7

Early February morning, the snow has partly melted by now. Out on the second-story balcony, the vapor coming from your coffee isn’t the only visible steam. Your breath is as well, it comes out in puffs before rising above your head and dissipating.

The air is crisp and refreshing, the sky is clear and the sun is shining brightly. For a moment, you close your eyes and let the rays warm your frozen, runny nose.

The coffee mug is scalding against your chest, it’s comforting, brings you solace and helps you think clearly about the conversation that is to come. You rest against the railing of the balcony, taking in the city beyond, Maisie is sniffling at your feet, already walked and fed because that’s the first thing you do in the morning, even before showering.

Your feet are cold despite the thick woolen socks and slippers you have on. You think it is what it is and decide to just live with it, your extremities have always been cold during the winter.

The sliding door behind you opens and you look back to see Findlay’s disheveled form standing there, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He yawns and stretches, the thick muscles under his tank top flexing and expanding, it’s a sight to behold for sure, but sadly you won’t be a witness to it for much longer. And he’s never cold, a part of you has always been jealous of that trait of his.

“Hey.” You call softly, voice still heavy with sleep. You keep your eyes on him for a bit longer before turning them back to the city.

“Ey.” He responds in kind and comes to your side, your elbows collide when he leans on the railing next to you, following your gaze towards the cluster of skyscrapers in the distance. There’s a brief moment of silence before he asks. “Is everything a’right? Ah didn’t expect you leavin’ a note f’ me out of all people.”

You take your time sipping coffee before speaking up again.

“Yeah, sorry. Didn’t mean to worry you. Just wanted to talk in private.”

Deep, steady breath and a calm mind were how you were going to get through this encounter. You just had to stay level-headed, that’s all, be friendly but keep him at arm’s length, for both your sakes.

“Was this about?” He doesn’t even seem bothered that stray snowflakes are falling on his bare shoulders, meanwhile, you’re shaking, but whether that’s from the cold or from anxiety is uncertain.

You take a breath, then another, then finally manage to string together the words.

“I found a place.” You begin and glance at him anxiously. “Y’know, to move into and finally stop being a freeloader here.” He doesn’t react and you take it as a bad sign so you continue, trying to lighten the already heavy atmosphere. “It’s already furnished so I won’t be stealing any of your things.”

“You can take wha’ever you wont, you know I don’t care.” He rasps, you hear the strain surging in his voice, the pebble stuck in his throat, the weight suddenly pressing down on his chest, a weight you had just put there. “You can take the whole place wi’cha, if y’ wanted. Still won’t care.”

“Fin…”

“Why?” You stiffen at his question, the rawness of his tone, the betrayal he’s trying to hide but is still so visible in those honeyed eyes you’ve come to love. It’s painful to watch him at a loss, not knowing how to combat your decision and ultimately having to let you go.

He looks like he’s been slapped.

You’d been preparing for this talk for days and it was hard for you, you couldn’t imagine what it was like for him. But you were set on your words, you couldn’t stay any longer, you didn’t want to.

“Because – ”

“ – Is someone botherin’ you?” He finally turns to face you. “Did someone do someth’n t’ you? Y’ can tell me, I always listen.”

“No, it’s not that.” You avert your eyes and stare into the blackness of your coffee instead, trying to find the right words in the murky caffeinated water. “Of course, nobody’s done anything, I love you all like family.”

A breeze blows past and manages to force a shiver up your spine. His first thought was to take you in his arms and bade the cold away, but just as abruptly as his hands lifted to reach for you, they fell back to his sides.

You wanted to cry… protest and have him continue, tell you that everything was going to be okay and that he’d take care of things like he always did. But now wasn’t the time for weakness. Because the hug would end, then he’d ruffle your hair and leave, nothing more. He wouldn’t hold you like a lover but like a sibling, a friend.

And you didn’t want to leave. You had to.

“Wot is it then? Yer room? Too small?” He asks abruptly, wracking his brain and trying to figure out your reasoning while simultaneously coming up with solutions. Anything to keep you from leaving him. He couldn’t bear the thought, not after everything. He’d move with you if it weren’t for his family depending on him, he didn’t care where in the world he was as long as it was with you. “You can have mine, Ah don’t care.”

You shake your head and his world shatters a little bit more.

“No. Fin, please listen to me.”

“Why den? Why leave?” He’s at a loss, completely forgetting that you can speak for yourself and he doesn’t need to play a guessing game. So he goes quiet and stares at you pleadingly, ignoring the ache in his chest and focusing solely on you.

“Please…Please, tell me what’s wrong…”

You take one last stressed sip of your coffee and set it down before turning to him properly, no longer leaning on the railing but instead facing each other in your full stature.

He at least deserved a proper reason and to look him in the eyes when you giving it.

“Because it’s not right to stay.” You say, then motion towards your chest as your brows knit together, an angsty expression bittering your features. “I don’t benefit you guys in any way. The best I can do is make food and clean up, help you with some tasks and run errands. I don’t fit in here. I’m not phreak, I don’t have any skills.”

Even in dire moments like these, you’re still so pretty to him. His little angel…

The way the sunrays cascade over your form, giving you an otherworldly glow, it takes his breath away and balms over his turbulent feelings and racing thoughts.

You always did have a way of soothing him. Soft words and gentle touches, that’s how you were, those are some of the many things that made you perfect in his eyes. Always caring for others, especially him who’s been alone in shouldering the unfairness of the world for so long.

“That never mattered.” He shoots back with confidence this time because it’s true. You’ve been a vital part of their team since you first came to join them. It didn’t matter that you weren’t a skilled hacker or couldn’t shoot a gun. Civilians had their own set of irreplaceable skills. Even if all you wanted to do was be Maisie’s sitter, you’d still be doing more than enough. “We all love you, we do. Couldn’t have made it dis far without ya.”

“Findlay…”

Why did he have to fight back so hard? Why couldn’t he just make things easy on you? You were already suffering with regret and the agony of separation before you’d even left, and seeing him this desperate, this sincere in trying to keep you from slipping away was just adding salt to the wound.

You wanted to hug him close and coo at him until he was calmed, tell him that this wasn’t goodbye forever. You’d come to visit, have dinners as a family again, take walks with Maisie and him, just the three of you. You just wouldn’t be constantly around.

That’s all. It wasn’t that serious, you weren’t moving to another city.

“So is not just tha’ then.” He scoffs to himself, rips his eyes off you to stare into nothingness. “Someone did do somethin’.” There’s a brief pause before his gaze rises again to meet yours, you see the bleak fire within it, still the combative spirit persists, refuses to let you go without a good tussle. “Tell me who, I’ll have a talk with ‘em, can resolve this right now.”

“No…” you rub at your eyes to massage away the tears.

You couldn’t tell him. You couldn’t.

It wasn’t his fault, it was yours. You’d fallen for him, not the other way around.

“What then? Why d’ ya wanna leave so badly?” His anguished, sullen words are like razors to your neck. You can’t breathe properly anymore. The sobs are beating down on your throat and you can’t fight them off for much longer.

“I – ”

“ – Don’ leave.” He says, begs you as much as a man of his character and ssize can. Your knees weaken at his pleads and you bite down viciously on your bottom lip to keep from breaking down completely. “You cannae leave me. Won’t let you.” He takes your hands in his, sucks in a long inhale and pulls you a bit closer, shielding you from the glare of the sun, from the cold, from the world, everything. “Please. Stay.”

You’re crumbling in front of him as he stands there silently and lets you speak. Mentally drained and emotionally at the brink, yet you refuse to let go of his hands and that’s enough to tell him that you don’t want to leave, but something is making you. And the worst part is that you refuse to tell him to keep him unburdened while you take on all of the weight and try to carry it away with you silently.

A part of him is enraged by this. How dare you try to take all the blame and let him demonize you for simply wanting to abandon him? How dare you take his job of carrying the hefty loads? He was the strong one, he was the tank, he was the shield that was supposed to separate you from all danger and problems.

He’d failed you…

He couldn’t stand it…

“I just…I can’t do this anymore, Fin.”

His thoughts come to a screeching halt.

“Do wha’?”

“This!” You let go of one of him long enough to motion between the two of you. “Whatever this is, whatever we are. I just… I can’t…”

He’s almost relieved to hear you confess your woes finally.

“Tha’s it?” He quirks a brow and you see the strain in his shoulders vanish. “Okey, aye I get it.” He rubs at the stubble on his chin, presumably in thought, but not really. The answer to your problem was right there. “I’s no problem. I’ll leave ya alone. Won’t hear a peep from me.” Despite the rejection that had been thrown in his face, he smiles wide. If this meant keeping you, he was willing to sacrifice. “Should’a said something earlier, lass. I just thought you – ”

“ – No!” You protest, yell nearly loud enough to wake up everyone still asleep. You want to rip your hair out with how exasperatingly daft he is. “You don’t get it!” You grip the straps of his tanktop, then tear your hands away from him only to hug yourself out of frustration. “I want – I – ”

This is the perfect moment, but again you’re left with a lump at the base of your mouth, a lock on your tongue, unable to speak the words. Beyond desperate to explain, you do the only other thing you can think of, you act before your self-sabotaging mind has a chance to talk you out of it.

You kiss him.

Stand high on your toes, pull him down by the neck, and link your lips to his. It’s a brief kiss, a sloppy and uncoordinated one, your mouths don’t even fit together properly.

Gasping for air, you pull away as abruptly as you’d leaned in and search his eyes for anything to hint at rejection.

He’d not done anything when you’d locked lips, hadn’t reeled back, but hadn’t reciprocated either so you were left in a standstill until he made up his mind.

He stares at you dumbly with his mouth agape and eyes wide and unblinking.

A minute passes and the doubt is already munching at your sanity. However, then you’re unceremoniously picked up and hoisted against his broad chest. He guides your legs to wrap around his toned torso, has your arms locked around his neck and mapping out what skin you can reach as he molds his lips back to yours. You feel your back being gently pressed into a wall to make sure you had support on both ends.

A meek mewl slips past you and his reply is a pleased grunt as he rubs needy patterns into your thighs.

He pushes his tongue past your teeth and twirls it around yours, beckoning you to play. The muffled moan that erupts from you is music to his ears, a noise unparalleled by anything he’s ever heard in his life. He presses harder against you, squishing you between his warm chest and the cold wall behind so there’s nowhere for you to run anymore. This was it, you were stuck with him now.

No more running, no more denying, no more beating around the bush.

He was certain now that you wanted him as much as he’d wanted you and he’d not let anything stand between you anymore.

And to think this was why you’d wanted to leave…

His baby stubble grazes your skin deliciously, a single compliment from you months ago and he’d started keeping it instead of shaving it off every morning.

He kisses you with suffocating need, bruising your lips and making them swell as he nips and licks and tastes, and explores every inch of your mouth. He indulges himself, gives into you like you’re a peace of Heaven on Earth, a sinful delight that’s been dangling before him for months, just out of reach.

The skin on his back ripples to life under your touch, awakens into eager goosebumps that you ghost over with flattened palms. You cross your ankles over his waist, your toes curling in delight the longer he smothers your mouth with his own.

A thin trail of saliva still connects you when Hazard pulls away long enough to take a breath before diving for your neck. You lean your head back willingly, rest your crown against the cement wall and crane your neck to the side to give him more room to explore. Your thighs begin to quiver when you feel his sharp canines grazing over your sensitive skin. His tongue works wonders into your flesh, makes you both giggle and choke on moans, completely forgetting about the cold or the exposure.

“Findlay…” You wail weakly, then gasp when he automatically bucks into you, spurred on by the call of his name. Sparks fly behind your lids and you rake your nails over his shoulders, riling him up even more.

“Shite…” He groans and struggles for air as his grip on your legs tightens. “Don’t do tha’, luv.”

“Why?” You question dumbly, too drunk on him to truly care for the answer. All you want is to keep feeling him, keep hearing his voice, and smelling his scent.

“Makes me go wild.”

You laugh out an apology, note the grin, the widest one you’ve ever seen, listen to him pant heavily through his nose and rest his forehead against your collarbones as he comes down from his high.

“I love you…” You blurt out and thump a fist weakly against his back. Your legs untangle from his waist without your consent, but every muscle in your body has turned to jello and you’re given no choice. You’ve turned to mush in his brutish embrace and you’d have it no other way. “You moron…I love you so much…”

It comes out so easily now like you’ve been saying it forever. It’s smooth on your tongue, feels right, deserved.

“I thought..” He chuckles, shaking his head in disbelief and the tips of his hair tickle your nose.

“You thought wrong.” You’re all too eager to interject, cutting off whatever idiotic, self-detrimental bullshit he was about to spit out.

Hazard brings his gaze away from the soft comfort of your sweater, and watches you from beneath his brows as the passion darkening his features morphs into the gentlest love. He readjusts, gives you a bit more movement space, but has no intention of letting you go. His hands are still palming at your legs, you can feel the heat coming off them and seeping over your skin even through the thick leggings hugging your thighs.

“Cannae blame me.” He says softly, words only meant for your ears. And despite the twinge of a joking tone, you know he’s serious, that he doesn’t think very highly of himself in terms of appearance. “Who’d wanna wake up t’ this ugly mug every mornin’.?”

It’s sad to think he’s been denying you and himself for so long because of self-doubt, thinking that you deserve better, that you should find better. Someone who has a stable life, can provide you with comfort instead of dragging you into a war and offer you a safe and calm life. Someone who didn’t have half his body replaced by cybernetics, a man fully human who wasn’t littered with battle scars.

“I would.” You combat tenderly and glide your hands down until they’re resting over the steady beat of his heart. “I want this.” You tap his forehead next. “And this. Everything that’s you, I want, Fin.”

“Don’t deserve a pre’y bird like you.”

It’s a compliment for you and an insult towards him, it’s unbearable to hear such bitter-sweetness. You press the cushions of your thumbs against his lips to shush him.

“None of that, please.”

He kisses you then, having forgotten for a moment that now he was free to do that whenever he wanted. The puppy love flares, lashes out, needing more of your essence on him. He wanted to have a piece of you always with him, hell, he’d carry you around in his pocket if that was an option, show you off to anyone who crossed his path.

You smile in contentment against him, cling to him with one arm as your free hand travels up to comb through the soft tuft of hair you’d helped him bleach not too long ago.

Serenity isn’t something you take lightly, you know it’s a gift to feel at peace, and he’s brought you so much of that this morning. You caress his cheek, both look over and trace his features with the tips of your fingers, committing every dip and line to memory.

He stands still for you, closes his eyes, and leans into your touch like a man who’s never been touched with tenderness before, never been handled with care.

Your very own hazardous beast turned pet by a drop of affection. It was as cute as it was tragic.

He deserved so much more. He deserved the world.

“Whenever we were together.” You begin, drawing his attention from studying your kiss-bruised lips to your eyes where he lets himself get lost. You shake your head at the confession, nearly cringing, but it was only natural, for which couple didn’t have their cringe-worthy moments? “Outside that is, running errands. I’d always watch you closely to see which women you’d look at. Wanted to know what you fancied.” It’s a silly little confession, but you want him to know, you want him to know everything about you, be your lager of sorts and from the way he’s focused all his concentration on you, you can tell he’s more than willing to be put to the task. So a smile etches itself onto your winter-chilled features and you continue. “But you never looked at anyone…I had to guess what you liked.”

The answer is simple in his mind, he spits it out without even having to think it through.

“Da’s cuz I only got eyes fer you, daftie.” He shrugs as if his words didn’t melt your core and nearly give you baby fever. “Don’t need ta be lookin’ at other birds.”

It’s been such a long game of denial and restraint and now that all cards have been laid face up on the table, you’re not sure what follows. You didn’t expect things to turn out as they did, the bags in your room were ready for departure, you’d thought this morning would be goodbye.

You kick your feet nonchalantly, still propped up several feet above the floor. He holds you as if you weigh nothing and compared to his usual load, you probably don’t.

“What do we do now?” Is the only thing you can muster to ask next, looking to Hazard for guidance as if he wasn’t just as lost as you were.

Mischief twinkles in his honeyed orbs, a certain thought pulls a smirk onto his lips before he answers:

“Shag.”

“Findlay!” You exclaim. You’re mortified while he just laughs. Anticipation makes your skin tingle. The image of peeling off his clothes and witnessing everything you’ve only dreamed of is both nerve-wracking and enticing. But his choice of words couldn’t have been more unattractive, he went straight to the point though.

“I don’t shag.” You say and cup his face gently, rub your thumbs over his cheeks and smooth down his cocky smirk. You make sure to catch his eyes and draw his attention out of its bubble of lewd images. “I make love.”

He blinks blankly at that, processing your statement, before showering you with suffocating pecks. He leaves no surface untended in his kiss crusade. You fight him off weakly, turning your head this way and that, eyes squinted shut at his loving assault.

His excitement is unmatched, he’s like a pup at a pet store.

When he’s satisfied with his work and you’re left visibly breathless, he pulls back.

“Le’s get some breakfast first doe, ‘m starvin’.”

<<< Chapter 6

Masterlist

[gamblersdoll]

Can you make guts x reader, and guts is like, super soft w reader, but he snaps the moment he gets horny 🙏🏻 and he gives reader head, being soft dom but still a dom (HEAVY ON SIZE KINK PLS 😭) I LOVE YOU GUTS X READER SO SO MUCH! IT MAKES ME SO COZY 💓

aligns with berserk timeline, soft yet harddom!guts, oral (f receiving) size kink

the water was freezing, the winter’s frost biting into the stream of whats left of water and leaving its venom inside of it. you shiver, teeth chattering along with goosebumps raising along your silky skin.

the only warmth was from him, the black swordsman who accompanied you for years. his hands carried more heat— along with the past blood of who hes killed and callouses that made his fingers thicks. his hands carried the water up to your chest, rinsing the blood from your skin (you knew you werent bleeding, but he had to make sure).

his hands cupped more water and brought it over your breasts, nipples pebbling and he kisses along your neck. “thank you,” he grumbles, his plump ass lips suckling your neck to leave his mark. “for checking you.” he finishes, hands sliding down your hips. “you know how i am..”

“i understand, Guts.” you say, him chortling and his hands feel along your groin, and alongside your lower stomach. “you want to go lower.. dont you?”

he stops, breathing through his nose heavily. “only if thats what you want, i wont do anything you dont want to—“ you cur him off, pulling his hand down to your cunt. it was only embarrassing since you never had anyone touch you there.. you wished there were something to do about hair. like some kind of elixir or powder. he pulled you in closer, looking over you to watch his hand fully cover your cunt. “youre so .. ethereal.” he says, a carnal desire starting to creep up on him.

you try to speak and reply, but he picks you up bridal style to press you against a tree. it was probably a bad idea, the tree starting to leak its own sap from the bark.

his lips smash against yours, yours colliding with his and you embrace him in all of his size— his body covering and swallowing you wholly. its not long before he’s ready to crack your legs open, seeing your drenched cunny (both water and arousal) slick down your folds. your hole clenched, an invitation for him to give you a once over before he pressed his head into you.

your moans bubbled out, his hands reaching up to your breasts for something to give his hands to do. you pant heavy, groaning when he presses his lips together to suckle hard on your bundle of nerves. “guts,” you say, eyes on him and a hair going into his hair. “whats gotten into you..?”

“stop talkin’..” he grunts, leaning up to gather all of his spit to ‘spat!’ onto your folds, going back down to lick it all back up onto his tongue. “just let me savor you, woman.” his hands move from your breasts to your thighs, squeezing hard and moving to suckle hard on the light stretch marks on the inner of them.

you close your eyes and gasp for air, feeling his tongue return back inside of your creamed walls to almost hit your gspot. “oh.. god.” you pitifully say, hearing him breath heavy from inhaling you.

you return to look at your position, seeming like a wounded animal being devoured by the biggest bear youve ever seen— because you were, you were the wounded animal that he captured long ago and barely healed you, and now? he was eating you, from cunt to tit, and he deserved all of your air.

“feel that?” he suddenly asks, you snapping back to him and he has his eyes on you. “youre about to come on my tongue, arent you?” he queries, you wonder how he even guessed that— because you were. “go on then, make my night.”

[ppnuggiexxx]

-> CHAPTER ONE | CHAPTER TWO

•| was it truly worth taking his word for it? how does one even enter hell, or was this all some strange cosplayer’s roleplay you happened to get roped in?

•| taglist :: @z4rph1m ,, @theultimatewaffle

        "fine!" as crazy as the whole situation was, you accepted his invitation. how else do you tell the supposed king of wrath no? not to mention the guys name is satan. honestly, if youre lucky these guys might be cosplayers. but the whole situation seemed surreal, the angel seemed too real.

        "follow me," he smiled and grabbed your hand before leading you away. "where are we going?" you questioned. he led you off the mainroad and into a forest, soon getting lost and turned around with the repeated trees. going into a forest you dont know or aren't acquainted with feels like youre in there for eternity. "the first gate of hell is where we're going." he stated.

        gate? what did he by the first gate? how many are there? "what do you mean?" you asked him, not caring that he still gripped your hand in his. his red eyes looked back at you before looking ahead of him again. "hell is gated off into different sections. there are nine gates in total; three of stone, three of brass, then three of iron." he explained.

        "it's to ensure utmost secrecy and security between the worlds. heaven has nine gates as well. though if you were to gaze upon them there would be nothing. its impossible for a human to see the gates unless theyre an angel. its what makes heaven quite hard to find."

        the deeper in he led you, the darker and colder the forest became. your hands went to your forearms and rubbed against them, your body hunching over to try and maintain as much body heat as you could. it almost felt like it was winter despite it being spring.

        ahead a dark cavern appeared into the side of a mountainside. you didnt even know there were mountains in the area. "who's that?" you pointed to a figure waiting around the cavern.

        "chaos. they usually guard outside of the gates. its to ensure any soul taken to hell doesn't attempt to escape." satan explained, saying a brief hello to chaos before entering the cave. "it does get dark and wet fast, so watch out where you step. ill lead the way though so stay close behind me."

        you nodded and glanced at chaos. they were a creature of unknown nature, they werent humanoid in any way yet didnt look like an animal. it was as though they were a clumb of skin, a few eyes sticking out and having a singular hand at the top. bones and blood stuck out from it. its hard to describe a being that made you feel like puking your insides out upon first glance. you turned your head away from chaos quite fast. you didnt want to look at them if you didnt have to.

        "can you tell me more about hell?" you asked and followed after satan, noting how dark it got. your hands stuck out in front of you, catious with your steps in case you run into a wall.

        "what do you want to know?" he asked, walking swiftly down the tunnel.

        "like, about the inside. where in hell are you taking me? is there cities? or is it like how biblical books say it is, a rampant city filled with torture and death?" you asked, curious as to what you would see. its not every day you take a trip to hell after all.

"well, we're going to gehenna. thats where i rule in hell. there are seven different nations, and to get to them you have to go through the gates. gehenna is protected by the first stone gate." he said before stopping in his tracks. "the further down you go, the colder it becomes. the more of a wasteland hell is until you reach abbadon at the bottom. abbadon is hotter than anywhere in hell, its the core of it. under abbadon? im not sure what lies there." he said.

"now, we wont be able to continue walking through. you'll have to crawl. its wet though, so be careful." he warned before taking off his jacket and holding it out to you. you raised an eyebrow at him before taking it and putting it on. "is there water?" you asked. he simply nodded before dropping to his knees and hands, crawling into a small hole. it was hard to see anything but the area itself closed off abruptly into a small crawl space.

who knew hell would be tricky to get to? you soon got on your knees and hands, the stone beneath you slick and cold. maybe you shouldve asked if he had gloves. feeling around for the hole, you had a small idea of how big it was, which wasnt that big at all. you had to keep your head down so you wouldnt hit it on the top of the crawl space.

crawling through felt weird, at random points it felt warm, then cold again. it was a repeated process, and sometimes it felt like something was touching you at certain parts. hopefully it was just the rock and nothing else.

"be careful up here, it gets smaller. you'll have to crawl on your stomach here." satan warned from ahead of you. it was like how people described entering hell to be. being forced to crawl on their stomachs, wriggling like serpents to trespass into hell.

it was hard to move through. your breathing quickening as you wriggled around in the tunnel. just how long was this going to take? how far down is hell? were you even going down, or was it straight? how was minhyeok? it had to of been morning by now, and he would be worried. maybe you shouldn't have came along, maybe you shouldve gone back to minhyeok?

it was too late to turn around now, incapable of moving backwards without knowing where you were going exactly. there had been a few turns through the tunnel. and you couldnt turn your body around, it was too cramped to do so.

"stop...." what was that? you couldnt see where the voice came from, but it sounded right on top of you. "hello?" you called out.

        "stop....moving." it almost sounded as though it was struggling to talk, like their words were forced between harsh breaths. you squinted your eyes and looked around as best as you could, desperate to find where it came from.

        "ignore it." satan called from ahead of you. why? what was it? some sort of mythical creature meant to drag you to temptation? you didnt want to find out, truthfully.

        the tunnel beneath you got slimier, sticking to your hand the further you crawled in. it felt like the stone turned to mush, almost equivalent to fat in a way. you heard a pained groan that didnt come from you or satan. your head tried to look around you, but the tunnel was too narrow. why did the ground beneath you feel oddly like skin?

_______________________________

birds chirped and flew across the sky, city almost a direct copy to any on earth. tall buildings and shops spread around, citizens walking about with their days. the only difference is that they were devils, horns big and visible as satan's. though some had little horns, so little you'd have to squint your eyes to see.

"welcome to gehenna." satan smiled at your expression of awe and wonder. "and welcome to hell." he grabbed your hand again and took you through the streets. it was almost like walking on the red carpet with a celebrity; citizens immediately noticed their king and you beside him. their faces held curiosity yet no ill intent.

he led you towards the largest building in the center of the city. it looked almost similar to a cathedral; stained glass windows covered the outside. it was larger than any you'd seen too. "my nobels and i live here." he explained as though he could read your mind.

        "what are they like?" you asked, a little nervous. you were still wary of the whole 'devil' thing, especially seeing as this seemed as legitimate as it could get. what weirdo shows up randomly to just lead you through a gross and disgusting tunnel into another city? how could a random crackhead explain what chaos was, or the things you saw? not to mention all the devils around you, eyes piercing into the back of your skull. was this just a surreal lucid dream? you didnt even know you could lucid dream.

_______________________________

        loud yells came from inside the room, the sound of complaints and cursing clear as day. satan grinned, waiting a moment before leaning his head against the door. "it seems theyre in an argument," his eyes widened and lit up. he waited another moment before busting the door open, any and all conversation taking place before was stopped.

"your majesty satan!" a blue haired devil announced. he had one horn on the side of his head and eyes similar to satan's, yet his were pink with blue saint peter's crosses. these devils sure like that cross, despite it not being demonic in any way.

        there were six devils in the room altogether, not including satan. one red one, small and squishy with small horns and wings. they had a dopey look on their face. another stood next to the blue haired one, long bangs covered their eyes. their horns were smaller than the others, yet a small red creature sat upon them.

        then a tanned devil with white horns curled over their head, with long white hair and blue eyes. two devils stood the farthest away; one with short hair and a long singular horn. next to him was a devil with three horns, all different colors, long, blonde hair and decked out with the color pink.

        all the devils in the room stood up from their chairs and kneeled before their king. "sitri," satan said to the blue haired devil. he looked up at him, eyes only focused on him. none of the devils bothered to look at you, eyes closed and heads pointed towards to floor.

        "ive found solomon's descendant."

[justhereforprettythingsandfanfic]

Stutter

Eddie x reader eddie x reader my very first attempt at fanfic no use of y/n no physical description of reader other than afab. Flight of icarus sort of canon no upside down though. I want to go ahead and start posting I'm not finished and I'm not sure how long the story will be I'll try to update weekly if y'all like it

word count 2518

trigger warnings reader with a severe speech impediment, parent with cancer, dead parent more warnings in later posts

The summer of ’85 Eddie and Wayne are sitting on the porch sharing a cigarette before Waynes shift when an old beat up pick up truck pulls into the trailer park loaded down with boxes. Its you and your dad moving in with your grandma fresh from Texas. You don’t really want to be here you know its going to be too cold in the winter and you’ll have to go to public school terrifying enough on its own you know your dad might not make it to the end of the school year. When he told you he was sick you thought it’d get better but its only been getting worse so here you are in Hawkins Indiana to stay with your last living relative. Your grandma never liked you much always impatient and angry with your stuttering you didn’t miss her much when she moved away only visiting once when you were little. Unpacking seems daunting the drive felt like forever but the boxes need to come in Dad is having a good day so you’ll be unloading together at least. You don’t notice Eddie watching you as you grab the first box out of the back. Grandma opens the door “hey sweetie glad y’all made the drive alright hope you didn’t make your daddy do too much of the work” yo don’t want to respond but know she”ll get angry so you try to stammer out a simple no ma’am that turns into a “nu nu nu nu nu 

no muh  mmm, muh muh ma’am” she sighs at you making you feel small as usual your neighbor and best friend Pete had helped you and your dad with the packing and loading and old Miss Annie from across the hall had packed y’all food for the trip. The rest of the unloading is dad talking to grandma giving her updates and whispering about the cancer you try not to take mind. You make up the couch for yourself after the last box is brought in grandma managed to get a two bedroom trailer when she moved here thinking that you and your dad would follow after her and now she’s right you’re going to miss having your own room but you don’t want to think about what having your own room here will mean. Its a restless sleep dad wakes you up sometime the next day suggesting you bake something miss Annie aught you to do for the neighbors he knows Wayne from when y’all visited last and sometimes Eddie helps grandma with things around the house need fixing. So up you get put up your hair and lose yourself in grandmas kitchen making beignets for the neighbors. Once they’re done dad walks over with you to the Munson trailer “ howdy I think darlene told you we’d be here this week figured we”d introduce ourselves I’m John and this is my daughter” you’re trying to hide behind him and the plate of beignets you don’t want to embarrass yourself or be interuppted but it looks like dad meant it when he said you’re going to have to stop hiding behind him he gives you a look letting you know he wont do your introduction for you it takes some time but you eventually manage to get out your name and you’re starting to tell mr Munson you made the beignets his nephew comes barging through in the middle go your struggle “ I mmmm muh 

muh muh muh made “Oh hey you made these awesome!” He’s so cute and you feel humiliated and angry you shove the treats into his hands turn tail and grab your walkman some tapes and your sketchbook from the trailer you now call home determined to find somewhere to lick your wounds you only walk a little while until you find a picnic table that’ll do for your pity party you know you shouldn’t be so upset its just so hard and he was the hottest guy you’ve ever seen in your life he probably thinks you’re retarded you turn the volume up on Stiff Little Fingers hoping the earth with swallow you whole. A sudden hand on your shoulder makes you scream and fall forward off the table because you couldn’t just sit like a normal person you’ve definitely scrapped your arms up your scrambling to see who or what just made you wipe out and maybe run for life but when you look up and see mr Munsons gorgeous nephew youre hoping that being on the ground will make it easier to be swallowed now you’re even more humiliated “Oh my god are you okay I wasn’t trying to scare you I’m so sorry are you okay is that bleeding” you take a long breath trying your best not to cry out of frustration “ I I I I its fu fu fu

Fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu fu 

Fu fine”“Listen Im so sorry I scared you and for being kind of an idiot when you brought those donut things over but I uh I’ll leave you alone”

Now you’re absolutely about to panic he looks like you just kicked his puppy and as much as you kind of want to hide you don’t really want him to leave theres no way you can get something out of your mouth fast enough to let him know that without looking like an even bigger moron than you currently do still sitting on the ground on your knees. You hold out your headphones like a dove with an olive branch. The soft smile he gives makes your insides squirm and then he’s pushing his hair back and wearing your headphones. Hope beats her fist inside your chest with a battle drum beat. Eddie starts head banging a little and hope beats faster. He takes of your headphones and hands them back to you “ super cool you like metal too” drum drum drum

“Th th th th th th th th

Thrash mostly” Eddie is still wearing that soft smile and you’re pretty sure you’re going to die. Then just to kill you softly even more he grabs your elbows to help you up “ So I know I said sorry already but I’m definitely sorry for being kind of a jerk and then for being a bigger jerk by scaring you but also your dad seemed kind of freaked out so I should maybe tell you to let him know that you’re okay but also it’d be cool if we could maybe hang out again” your head feels like a lightbulb about to explode from too much electricity and simultaneously feel like a brat for leaving your dad like that, Eddie definitely sees it on your face “ We can totally walk back together we don’t have to hang out or anything” Why cant your voice just work “nu nu nu nu nu nu nu nu 

Nu nu nu no I uh I uh huh rrrrrr ruh ruh ruh really huh huh wuh wuh want to ha ha ha ha ha ha ha 

Hang out” “cool thats cool so to your dad first and then I’ll com by like tomorrow or something maybe” its too quick back to the trailer, but you absolutely know you’re going to be writing your first letter to Pete as soon as everyone goes to bed.   

Eddie was pretty confident when he first stayed behind instead of going to LA with Paige, but now that its been a month he was starting to regret his choice a little, but now after meeting you he’s really confident staying was the choice. It kind of feels like fate from a fantasy novel or something equally as cheesy maybe he’s losing mind maybe he should put the joint out. He cant believe after his fumble and scaring you nearly to death you actually want to hang out. He falls asleep excited about seeing you again. His hope are kind of dashed when he walks out of the trailer to see you driving out of the park with your grandma in the passenger seat. Before he can turn to go back inside your dad comes out and starts walking his way Eddie’s palms start to sweat this is probably going to end with him getting a fist in the face or worse. “Hey kid, you got a second to talk to an old sick man” your dad kind of laughs a half hearted attempt  at humor, 

“uh yeah sure of course, Wayne’s sleeping though so uh is it cool if we stay out here”

“Absolutely I remember what its like working nights it wasn’t that long ago”

“So uh you wanna tell me tasty away from your daughter right”

Your dad actually laughs now so hard it almost hurts, poor Eddie sweating bullets is confused and mildly terrified Hopper is gonna be finding pieces of his body in the woods or something

“Well quite the opposite actually as you can certainly tell my girl has a rough time and I’ve been sheltering her probably too much I was wondering if you’re still in high school I’m enrolling her in public school for the first time since kindergarten we’ve been homeschooling ever since but uh anyways so you still go to the local high school right?”

“Unfortunately yeah I’m gonna be a senior again” Eddie kind of thinks he might know where this is going but he cant quite shake his anxiety 

“She’s going to take her placement test, but I want to ask you to maybe look out for her”your dads face is firm like he’s dead serious because he is Eddie reminds him of some of his own friends from Texas as a kid

“I don’t think I’m the person you really want to be asking that”

“ What cause you got long hair and listen to the “devils music””

“Well most people around here aren’t really cool about it”

“You been helping my ma with her garden and yard for how long son and I’ll have you know my hair was prettier than yours ‘fore the meds made it fall out I think I know who I’m asking, but do me a favor and don’t tell her I asked you alright I don’t want her to think I don’t think she can do it I just want to know she’s got at least one person looking out for her” Your dad holds out his hand, Eddie self consciously wipes his palm on his jeans before he raises it to shake hands with your dad.

“I do have one question though I mean well I asked her if we could hang out sometime or whatever, but like would it be cool with you if I took her out to the diner or something” Now Eddie knows he’s going to get punched.

“ You know not to interrupt her, no matter how long it takes her to get her words out and to be kind about don’t look away while she’s talking you can do that, you can take her to the diner.” Your dad nods his thanks and goes back to the trailer. Eddie goes to his own room tiptoeing and being careful not to disturb Wayne. He doesn’t know what to do or how to feel its absolutely insane that he met a girls dad and they actually want him to take her out its insane. Maybe he got sucked into an alternate dimension. He should be doing something productive he should go out and do something but now all he can do is stare at his ceiling and wait for you to come back from your test. His chest hurts hes pretty sure he might actually be having a heart attack. Eddie really really cant believe your dad is actually cool with him and enough that he got asked to watch out for you damn.

When you get back from your placement test you kind of just want to hide in the couch and sleep through the next year. You absolutely do not want any part of public school it looked like a prison and the teacher administering the test was about as warm as you assume a prison warden would be, but at least you only have to do one year. You don’t make it out of the truck before Eddie comes bounding over to open the door for you. Your grandma is not impressed and clears her throat loudly in her distaste so Eddie runs around and opens her door too. You’re kind of frozen in your seat you watch your grandma say something to Eddie before she goes into the trailer and he comes back around to you. Well this is not what he expected you look scared of him again and its clear you’ve been crying. “Oh sorry I just wanted to well you said yesterday you’d like to hang out but its totally cool if you’re not into it.” You’ve got to get some words out you can already feel the lack of air and pain in your chest “tha tha tha tha tha

Tha tha tha tha.” You cant get it out you didn’t want to cry anymore but its coming anyway. Eddie feels incredibly awkward and isn’t sure what to do he starts backing up giving you space he doesn’t want to just walk away but he doesn’t want to crowd you and you have him all sorts of confused. You notice his step back and you are absolutely devastated the first guy you’ve ever even thought was cute the first guy to give you the time of day and you’ve ruined it full on panic attack now theres no air peripheral vision is gone can’t even get out of the seat of the car. Eddie decides the best thing he can probably do is grab your dad for you he has no idea how to handle this he can handle some of the freak outs from his sheepies at school but this is like way out of his wheelhouse. Looks like your grandma beat Eddie to the punch your dad is already walking out onto the porch when he turns around the look on Eddie’s face lets your dad know its bad “hey kid you wanna help me with her or do you need a minute?” “Help yeah yeah I can help” you cant hear anything over your hyperventilating and pounding heart positive this is the time you die and then familiar hands are on your face “pumpkin breath” “big breath pumpkin” “you’re okay” you finally start to match breaths with your dad and realize eddies still there and you want to panic again because you’re once again humiliated. Your dad can definitely tell you’re embarrassed, “its okay pumpkin he said he wanted to help just like Pete and Annie.” You really want that to be helpful unfortunately that just makes it worse, but actually you know it would make sense that your first crush on an actual guy and he’d be gay.

Next

[charliemwrites]

(losing my fucking mind rn tumblr closed out on me and made me have to rewrite this ask from the beginning 😞😞)

but anyways!!! obedient sitting on johns lap, dozing off in their heavily decorated house (he bought her every holiday themed decoration her lil heart desires, the theme of their house is light and snowy with white tinsel and pretty garlands and fairy lights around every corner, accenting the dark wood floors and oak furniture perfectly <3) the smell of cocoa heavy in the background. price never ever lets her drink, but tonight is an exception. shes cupping a mug of peppermint schnapps in her little hands, sipping on it slowly and price laughs so hard at the sight of his good girl being tipsy, the vibrations of it rumbling through his chest and slightly jostling her; but shes too sleepy and warm, almost asleep from the combination of her keepers big burly arms wrapped around her and the heat in the house being cranked due to the cold outside. shes chatty today, probably because of the drink but mainly because of how excited she is to finally see her owner again. they talk about their days, share stories about childhood holiday experiences (she cant seem to remember hers though..), share lots of little kisses and snuggle each other; watching various winter themed hallmark movies and giggling about how corny they are (she secretly loves them and more than once, price catches her peering up at him from her place on his lap; her big doe eyes staring at him in adoration) shes more than a little drunk when she ends up falling asleep on him in front of the roaring fire. he chuckles to himself and kisses her head, shifting just barely to keep from waking her; as he grabs a big plush throw (one she picked out!!!!!) and spreads it out over them. they wake up the next morning, tangled together and faintly smelling of mint and his cologne. they both get up to go potty a little while after price nags obedient enough; and her legs feel like mush from sleeping on the couch overnight. (even if she technically slept on price, EVEN though their couch could count as a small twin sized bed its so big and cushy) its okay though, because price is off for a week and has time to help his kept bake and cook all day!!!! (rare holiday leave<3, he might get called in but god help whoever he has to face if it means taking away from the time he has with his babygirl) they make lots of cookies, end up feeding each other half of them before they even get to icing them (!!!!! they make a game out of it, seeing who can get more of the unused icing on the others face !!!!!!!!!!!); and price hasnt seen his pet this happy; ever. if only he had time off all the time!!! oh. oh. he wont bring it up just yet, but retiring is starting to sound like a good idea…

-🎄🎄anon (happy holidays love!!!!!!!)

Oh I hate when tumblr does that, you’re a trooper for rewriting it. Fun fact, if my computer doesn’t save something I’ve written, I just about abandon the whole project. It’s only happened a couple times, but it drives me a special kind of crazy.

Now for this little Drabble I’m utterly obsessed with. 🎄🎄?? This is brilliant. Ever since @ceilidho made that bear!price fic, I’ve been yearning to just hibernate through the damn winter with this man. I love everything about this, no notes. Just a deep deep need to have this experience.

[rain-day-today]

Happily Ever After

“And with a loud crash the dragon swept the princess into the blazing sky, igniting terror in the hearts of all who dared gaze upon the wretched sight”

Lucy was in far too deep in the world of the book. The pacing and word choice made each character seem to come alive,but now with this final line it was over. “That's not the way its supposed to end” She lightly shrieked, tears stinging her eyes as she momentarily mourned for the poor souls in the textual world. The cruelty of the pages contrasting with the sweet smells of cherry blossom and orchids outside her window sill. Tears rolled down her cheeks as the last page was turned to reveal nothing. It was all over.

“Lucy!” Dashes of pink and blue came to her side wrapping her into a hug. “What's wrong? What happened, who do we need to fight?!”

“No it's nothing, just-“ Lucy wiped a tear, unsure if it would be ok to tell them or if it would just be more ammo.“ The book... I thought that they were going to get their happily ever after and they didn’t .” Her two confidants looked at eachother unsure of what to do. “It's stupid I know.”

“No it's not,” Natsu affirmed softly, but with a steady firmness that made her believe him. “You really liked that book.”

Lucy sighed another tear falling “ I still do, the writing is amazing…it-it-just didn’t end the way I wished it did.”

Natsu brushed away a hair from her face. Lucy had a habit of getting attached to the character she read about, and this book was all she could think about for weeks. A reaction like this though? The ending must have been horrible to hit her so hard.

He glanced at his little buddy. Happy nodded in knowing, already heading towards the kitchen to start the teapot. “Wanna take a walk?”

Lucy looked up at him feeling stupid but grateful. “Yeah”

Magnolia was in full bloom. The winter had let up and the trees were swaying in spring winds. Wind chimes danced and the sound of footsteps created a rhythm so very real.

“So what was the book about?” They had been silently wandering around the streets like stray cats. It was calm. Lucy kicked a rock, a wave of regret washing over her. Her childishness and lack of controll over her emotions was something she felt she needed to overcome, and having it on display, felt mortifying in hindsight. “Luce, You don't have to go into detail or tell me anything, I'm just curious”

“It was a…fairy tale novel.” She started, “a romantic story about a princess under a curse and her lover, whose own curse could heal her.” Natsu listened intently, until her sniffles and voice cracks smoothed, untill she got to explaining the end. “They won, they beat the villain, broke the curse, and, well— I thought they were going to get married. And now…they wont.” Her voice strained and softened. She turned away from him , eyes watery and embarrassed, but her best friend grabbed her hand before she could take another step and just held it. No words of comfort came, but the action was all she needed. Her pace slowed to a stop as she intertwined their arms and he squeezed her hand, reminding her how to breathe.

“It makes me worried.” The truth tumbled out. “If they can't have a happily ever after–how could I?” Sometimes it felt as though she was fighting a losing battle. Calm moments passing by like the light of a shooting star. It felt hopelessly overwhelming, as if she was running through a tunnel without a light at the end of it. The silence beside her felt deafening. Say something. She wanted him to say something. Claim that her happily ever after was around the corner, Insist he could see it waiting for her by a fireplace, that he could take her there.

“Isn't this Happily ever after though?” His answer, a question that echoed in the night sky, made her. look up at her partner in true wonder. His Green eyes, only showing their true vibrancy in the most special of light, replied back with a look of earnest adoration “I mean, I don't think most people would like all the nitty gritty stuff we do, but we like it dont we?” A classic natsu smile spread onto his face accompanied by a small blush. He scratched his cheek looking away, but still holding her tight. “Well I mean, I do! I like fighting monsters and looking for treasure way more than sitting still in a boring old castle doing taxes all day!” Somehow a giggle escaped her, leave it to her Natsu to say the perfect thing, with the most humorous reasoning. His head snapped towards her, an expression of mock anger crossing his face “I'm being serious! Imagine having to stay inside forever, and never getting to go on adventures! That sounds so boring and—oh god imagine getting stuck with someone annoying, like Gray!” Her giggles had turned into full laughter at his wholehearted explanations, completed with intense hand movements. “Lucy quit laughing! I'm being super serious!” She only cracked up harder.

“I thought you were trying to make me feel better!”

“Yeah, feel better, not die of the giggles!” Natsu tried to hold a serious expression, but also quickly dissolved into a fit of giggles, making her laugh harder.” Quit it!” He grabbed her waist and started spinning her around “stop giggling!”

“ NATSU!!!” Her sides started to hurt, but she just couldn’t stop, she didn't want to. maybe this really was happily ever after.

It could have been minutes or it could have been hours later but they were breathless. Still in his arms she couldnt help but ask,

“Natsu, do you think they ever got their happily ever after?” Tears weren’t pricking her eyes anymore, but her heart hurt a little at the idea that her precious book characters never got their deserved ending.

“They found each other, didn’t they?” he breathed through a smile. “I think that was there happily ever after”

[seldomscilence16]

Alright so this all started with a lego set at work, turned into a long ass intro, then its 11 on Christmas Eve and I decide to just do the Christmas snippet and finish the rest/context later.

So please ignore spelling 😬 and Happy Holidays all! Also TW for a bit of Racism at one point, theres a bullying scene but a short one. "Well if it isnt..." is where it starts and "there a problem here." Is where it ends.

Hope you enjoy this snippet! Stay safe everyone and thank @autisticlancemcclain for the Bug boy Lance!

...

Lance could kick himself.

He knows better than this. He knows what happens, he knows that once they get what they want, they'll leave.

And yet, here he is, spending hard earned money, on four classmates. Sure he'd saved them for last, focusing on his families gifts first and foremost- its the main reason he got the job, part going to saving for emergencies, the rest to spend on Christmas- but he was doing the thing he'd sworn off.

No people. People hurt and use and lie and tease. Lance was supposed to he strong until college, his fresh start, but then these four had to go and be NICE and do their part and- yeah the bar was really low...

"This isnt going to end well." He mumbles, the hustle and bustle of the mall overwhelming with holiday traffic and leaving him worn out before he even enters an actual store.

He scans aisle after aisle, berating himself for putting so much thought into something he wasnt even supposed to be doing. His eye catches something green and he comes to a halt. Its legos, one of those collectors sets that costs an arm and a leg, but Lance hadn't even known Lego did THIS.

'The insect collection'.

"Blue Morpho Butterfly, Hercules Beetle, and a Chinese Mantis." He breathes in awe, eyes scanning every detail.

"Well if it isnt Mclame."

His head snaps up, a group of classmates before him, most of which are his very reason for his No People rule.

"Still a freak about bugs I see, surprised you havent married one yet- maybe even they dont want you!" He snorts when he laughs, a strange noise from the back of his throat that remind Lance of a Donkey or Pig.

"Not like he could even afford it, if you want you can have your mom come clean my house." One girl taunts from the back, Lances blood boiling at the blatent racist remark despite Lance's CUBAN heritage.

"If you do have money to spare you should buy me lunch instead, for having to be in your vecinity for this long." Another boy plugs his nose, like he showers every day. Lance sits behind him in English, and he does not.

"There a problem here kids?" A man in the mall security uniform eyes them all carefully, eyes giving Lance a once over that makes him uncomfortable.

"No sir." He replies polity, deciding another store may hold better finding anyway- at least better company.

....

Lance's budget was low to begin with, but eventually he comes up with ideas for the four.

It starts with Hunks treats. The things that get them through their library sessions when the projects blur. And Lances job allows him access to plenty of people who would love to share things with anyone who will listen. So painstakingly, Lance translates recipes to paper as the older generations he enteracts with give him a little baking show.

Shiro's, surprisingly, comes next. A single comment about how much he hates ruined shirt sleeves, as they get caught on his prosthetic port. Its winter, and tank tops simply wont do, so Lance finds himself knitting in his spare time. Doing hours of research to see what possibilities will be the most comfortable, with of course a very lame joke on the front.

Pidge's was an accident. Lance's bike- sabataged it would seem- leaves him crashing off path in a ditch on his way home from work. He ends up limping his way through thick folliage, dragging a broken bike in the late hours of the afternoon. The little squeak is almost ignored, the second one however, well its Lance.

The little thing is a puffball, Lance was almost sure it was a toupé, until it moved and blinked at him. He thinks its a dog, no idea what kind, but its tiny and fluffy and following him home. Lance has three allergic family members, but Pidge mentioned a family dog who had sadly passed away and nearly broke Lances heart. The green eyes tell him this little thing will be a lovely match.

Keith is the hardest. Lance honestly almost buys a knife, because the guy is a conspiracy theorist and gets into way too much trouble not to have a few knives on him. But it doesnt seem right.

But Lance see's how often he doodles.

Freakin gorgeous doodles.

Then he finds the brand 'Keff Artistry' and its too close to 'Keef' for Lance to pass up.

...

He almost tells his family to simply lock him up and burn the gifts, but then they'd be worried and he's trying to avoid that thank you, hes been doing an excellent job masking his turmoil thus far.

So, the day before Christmas Eve, Lance gathers his gifts in trembling hands, and slips out of the house unseen. If this turns into a mess, he'll deal with it himself this time. He has to grow up eventually, he cant keep crying about bullies to his family, its not a big deal anyway.

"What the heck happened to your face!?" Pidge's incredulous tone has everyone eyes snapping towards said face.

"Its nothing, bike accident." Lance shrugs it off, as he'd done when he'd come home with it, he had too little proof anyway. Anyone could have carved 'McLame' into the side of it.

"Accident huh?" Its mumbled by someone, but Lance cant place it and decidedly ignores it anyway.

"I uh... have gifts... for you guys." He changes the subject, directing the attention to the bags he carries.

"For us?" Hunk asks, eyes wide and sparkly, "You know you didnt have to buddy."

Well, supposedly.

"Yeah, its not much, but uh, here." He hands them out carefully, extra careful with Pidge's.

"Guess its a good thing we brought ours to you then." Shiro says, pulling a wrapped box from the spare chair.

Lance's eyebrows furrow, staring at the box in confusion, perhaps with a little trepidation,

"You guys got me something?"

"Yeah! We all pitched in!" Pidge grins at him, something she does sparingly- grin that is.

He takes it with clammy hands, still shaking ever so slightly. He holds it to his chest as he watches the others open their bags, watches their faces carefully.

Hunk holds the hand bound book tenderly, eyes shining as he flips through the pages carefully.

Shiro stares in awe at his sweater, a chuckle escaping him as he runs his fingers over the soft material.

Pidge squeaks, as the small dog bumps its head against her face, cold nose sniffing excitedly. She holds the animal close, the dog snuggling up like he always belonged there.

Keith is staring at his gift. The art set held half out of the bag, as if he hadnt been expecting it. He turns wide eyes towards Lance, and the cuban can see the emotions there.

This is one of Lance's favorite parts about giving. When he did good in the eyes of the reciever, when they LIKE what he gave, genuinely. No matter its monetary value.

"Lance, this is amazing." Shiro breaks the silence, turning wide eyes his way, smile big and bright and real.

"I cant imagine how long this took, this is amazing! I havent even heard of some of these!!!" Hunk is tearing up, book hugged to his chest, grinning at Lance like he'd been given a great treasure.

"I cant believe you got me a dog! He's just a little puff!" The excitement is so nice to hear, its practically contageous.

"I... havent recieved something this nice from anyone but family before. Thanks Lance." Keith is downright shy as he admits this little fact about himself, and Lance could cry.

"I'm... really glad you guys like them."

"Now open yours!" Hunk encourages quickly, sitting to watch him intently, practically vibrating.

Lance could almost feel scared, but....

He allows himself a little hope.

He opens the paper gingerly, savoring his first gift from anyone outside of family. A corner is revealed, familiar for some reason, another inch-

Lego Ideas The Insect Collection.

"What-" It comes out choked, shock clear on his face.

Is it a joke? Are they mocking him? It was expensive, theres no way they'd spend that much on a joke right?

"Its the one you wanted right?" Pidge asks, a slight pinch to her brow.

"We only saw you from across the mall, so we didn't know- You're crying oh Gods, whats wrong Buddy-" Shiro Panics, quickly kneeling by the chair Lance had collapsed into.

"I don- Why- I can't- "

"Breathe! Come on-" Hunk exagerates his own, encouraging Lance gently to follow as he chokes on tears and air and spit alike.

"Its not a joke right?" He finally gets out, looking pleadingly to the group, running a reverant hand across the box, "You did this to be nice?" He can hear the vulnurability in his own voice, but he's about a second from breaking completely.

"Yes, yes, of course! All 1,111 pieces are inside!" Shiro assures quickly, rubbing a soothing hand over his shoulder and arm.

It gets a wet chuckle from Lance, as he pulls the box to his chest once more.

"No ones... thank you so much, I can't... can't tell you how much this means." He wipe at his face, "I'll repay you, I promise-"

"Hey, its a gift Lance." Keith says, voice softer than ever, "We wanted to get it for you."

"Merry Christmas Lance."

"Merry Christmas."

[carries-corn-syrup]

i’m gonna take fandom fanfic requests. under the cut is the first chapter of a fanfic i’m writing, so you get an idea of what you might be getting!

what i’ll write for:

1. dead rising

2. slasher/horror films (none on my blacklist, request-based)

3. american horror story (i wont write x readers)

4. five nights at freddy’s

you can also ask about me looking into fandoms!

Cecil Hargrove. Not a particularly remarkable person in the least. Prone to nosebleeds and seizures, just barely holding on to life. Cecil was strong, somehow. His parents always knew that. Strong how? Nobody really knew. Not even his family.

The house they lived at was unremarkable as well. Ranch house, 3 bed, 2 bath. Cecil had a brother, Samson, who didn’t seem to care about anyone except himself. Their aunt, Dannie Sue (her real name was Danielle), had just given the family reservations to the resort she worked at as a caretaker.

“More like janitor,” Samson snorted when Dannie first gave them the envelopes with their reservations. The key card was in mom’s envelope, obviously. A 17-year-old boy and his 12-year-old brother can’t take care of a card by themselves. Dannie was indeed a pushover, so she got great rooms for her sister. A suite, actually. Poor old Dannie, with her downturned eyes and dark hair that never bothered to grow past her shoulders. Brave Cecil, who clung to life and wouldn’t let go. Stupid Zinnia Hargrove, who accepted Dannie Sue’s request.

The road is unforgiving in Colorado. Any resident will tell you as much. The road in Colorado in winter? A different, worse story. Zinnia maneuvered the van through the icy roads, being extra careful with Cecil’s wheelchair in the back. Cecil was ambulatory some days, but most days his disorder would make it hard to walk or move on any given day. Chronic pain, hot flashes, nosebleeds. The doctors couldn’t really identify it. They said it was epilepsy. Old people in the park seemed to talk to him, ask him what his favorite dinosaur is, without moving their mouths. Cecil loved dinosaurs. He always did.

Magnus Chapman got ready for his shift as he always did. That goofy little white jumpsuit he always wore, stained by grease and his blood. He really put everything he had into this job. A simple, tedious job: keep the commercial-grade convection heater (better known as a “boiler”) from exploding. Apparently some vandal back in 2019 made headlines by doing the opposite. It had made strange sounds to Magnus a few times, but he always kept the boiler in check.

Until now.

Check, adjust, calibrate, repeat. He did it all day every day. Magnus forgot to calibrate today. He forgot to adjust. Then, he forgot to check. Once the blonde returned from his lunch break, the boiler did exactly what he’d been preventing it from doing. The force of the blast knocked him unconscious. Right?

He woke up in the staff room with an ice pack on his head. One of the workers, a guy his age by name of TJ, was standing over him.

“You, uh.. you fell real hard. Feel ok?”

“Yeah, I’m… i’m fine,” Magnus returned the gesture, setting a hand over one of TJ’s. They’d built a rapport since then, awkward exchanges and drunken chats at staff parties. TJ was a janitor, but had a habit of not really doing his job. He was a somewhat anxious guy, always on-edge despite his face often saying otherwise. TJ worried. He felt something, like a radio tuning to a station that played something evil. He felt a disturbance.

It was back.

Good God. By it, TJ’s frantic mind obviously meant the Overlook. Where he died. Where he couldn’t leave. Poor Magnus. He didn’t know TJ was dead. He didn’t even know he was dead. Sweet, innocent Magnus. Unmarried, died at 39. His lip nearly quivered at that. He snapped himself out of it. They were good friends. Colleagues. He can pity a colleague. He can pity a friend.

“Uh, TJ?” Magnus’s voice racked him out of his panic.

“What?”

“The forks… the forks are floating,” Magnus responded, pointing at the ceiling. He seemed almost unphased by this. TJ looked up and, surprise, the forks were indeed levitating, their tines brushing the ceiling. He blinked a few times. They all came crashing down, the sound grating on his sensitive ears.

A silent beat between the two of them. Hesitation? Tension? TJ’s mind wandered, worried, panicked.

“Wanna go.. forget about that?” Magnus asked TJ, obviously referring to getting a drink.

“I’ve been sober for years, Mag,” TJ responded flatly.

“That being said, I’d be alright with a cigarette and a good chat out on the back stair.”

[uefb]

Chapter 3 of Older, or Two Brothers and a Train Station is up now ^_^

Note: this fic is so far before canon I’m really stretching on these damn gifs, forgive me 😆 but 5yo Newt cuddles with a puppy in this chapter and 14yo Theseus gets one of his first examples of using one’s wiles for personal gain, so they seemed… vaguely appropriate? /sweat emoji

Excerpt (Opening Scene):

Theseus sat on the couch across from the fireplace, reading in the light of the oil lamp, the single electric bulb his father had installed in a fit of fascination the summer before, and the golden sphere of illumination his mother conjured for him to read by as she hurried through the room. For the better part of an hour now, Rowan and Helios had been cloistered in their bedroom, apparently engaged in some kind of very serious adult conference about the contents of the IUM’s letter. In that time, Theseus had gotten up once to yell outside for Newt—to be certain he hadn’t managed to get himself killed in his brief hours of unsupervised activity—but, beyond that, he was just trying his best to focus on the herbology chapters he was meant to be reading in preparation for the Fourth Year’s upcoming unit on bubotubers.

He looked up, though, at the sound of sudden fumbling at the door—the distinctive thump thump of small boots being kicked off on the porch—and then Newt’s head appeared, peering in, between the screen door and the frame. Theseus waved and patted the cushion beside him in invitation as Newt shucked off his coat in the doorway (or, more accurately, wriggled out of it, for his fingers were apparently too clumsy with youth and winter-cold to manage the buttons). Newt rubbed hard at his runny nose when done and observed Theseus’ repeated patting of the couch, but he still hesitated, and then very unsubtly glanced toward a short dark shape just behind him, outside the door.

“You can let whatever animal that is in, little brother,” he immediately reassured, with a quiet laugh. “Just come on - sit with me. I’m doing herbology homework, so I could read to you. Hm?”

Newt hovered only a moment more before throwing open the screen door and scooping up a floppy-eared puppy, which looked very much like it had just been well-fed and was consequently very ready for bed. Newt scuttered across the room and handed the little dog up to Theseus, before clambering onto the couch beside him to curl about the tiny thing. The puppy immediately began licking his cheeks and rolling onto its back, showing its little pink belly like puppies are wont to do when they want affection. Theseus selected a section of the assigned chapter to read aloud; and Newt listened as he stared at the flickering flames in the hearth across from them, fingers moving soothingly down the puppy’s nose until—within a half hour—both dog and boy were deeply asleep.

(Theseus certainly couldn’t fault Newt for choosing sleep over homework—management of bubotubers was hardly invigorating...)

When their parents finally returned downstairs a half hour after that, though, it was very obvious Rowan had been crying, and Helios had the kind of look on his face Theseus had seen a few times at Dueling Club: something between annoyed, rueful, and defeated. It didn’t quite look right on him, for—around his children, at least—Helios spent the majority of his time bemusedly smiling. Rowan was not particularly a “crier” either so, between the two of them, Theseus’ back stiffened of its own accord and he shifted slightly beneath the weight of the textbook.

His mother crouched in front of him and closed the book—thoughtfully marking his page with a pin from her loose hair—and she set it all aside on the floor before placing gentle hands on his knees—

“We need to talk, sweetheart,” she said quietly, and Theseus tried to catch his father’s eye for context, but he seemed farther off in his own head than usual, for he was observing Newt with an expression Rowan liked to teasingly call his ‘discerning Ravenclaw face’.

“Mum—”

Theseus turned his attention back to her but reached out a hand to pet the sleeping puppy within his brother’s arms.

“What was that letter about? From the Ministry?”

“Well, we need to talk, ducky,” she repeated, and she turned over a palm, offering it for him to take. “Come here and let me make you hot chocolate. A holiday treat.”

“But Newt—”

“Is not your problem right now,” she interrupted firmly, though not without kindness (even if he still felt his cheeks flush hot at the admonishment). “We are the parents, Theseus, and your father is putting Newt to bed.”

So Theseus stood reluctantly, moving gingerly to prevent upsetting his brother or the puppy, and he let his mum wrap her hand about his and tug him toward the kitchen.

Over his shoulder, Helios was gently scooping a slightly stirring Newt into his arms, puppy tucked tight beneath his chin. He turned and took the stairs smoothly—humming what Theseus was almost certain was one of Uncle Hesiod’s “quidditch” (drinking) songs as he disappeared from view—and Theseus sat down with his mother, again, at the kitchen table.

He watched the minute movements of her face in the flickering lamplight as she summoned ingredients for drinking chocolate.

He forced a reassuring smile when she turned back around with the steaming milk.

He folded his hands on the table and waited.

[thelavendercatalogue]

Wrote something for my LJ series that wont be posted on my AO3 for a while cause we're not up to this part of the story, but this was an attempt at writing 2 characters that are being introduced into the story and I figured I might as well share it cause I actually like how it came out

Characters belong to @pavlien

"Keep walking"  Someone mumbled, breathing warm and harsh and that voice was the only thing grounding Kaz to his own body. He felt sick, his muscles burned and chilled and there was an acrid aftertaste in the back of his throat like nothing he had tasted in years. How many times has he gotten sick so far? He didn't know. It was all spinning hard and fast around him...

...there had been so many dead bodies. So many corpses with no reason to be dead. People he knew. . .people he once knew. Why did it ever get this bad?

He should have listened. 

He should have listened to Oliver, Oliver always was the smarter one of the two of them. He knew better. Kaz hated him for leaving, but now he understood why he did. Now he understood and it took everything in Kaz to keep from sobbing for the first time in such a long time. 

Sobbing. Vomiting. Cursing his own name. 

Oliver had never steered him wrong before. Why on earth would he have ever thought that he would do it now? Why did he never say anything when Don labeled him a traitor. . .when they. . . he knew better. . .why did he. . .

God. Why was it so fucking hot.

It was supposed to be winter for god-fucking-sakes, the season of falling leaves and frosty mornings. Instead, it felt as if he'd just walked out into a blazing, relentless sun that pierced through his eye like needles and made his head ache.

He'd never been thirsty and hot like he had been now in such a long time. . . 

"Kaz."

He tried to say something but his throat was too dry to do more than give a thin whine.  Someone grabbed his shoulder roughly and shook. A shock-wave of pain raced down his side and he let out a hoarse cry, practically curling in on himself.  

“You gotta stay awake.  C’mon, stand up straight-” It was an order, rough but with the smallest bit of shake underneath. Enough to force the man back to reality. 

He blinked and forced his eye open. He had been wrong. . .It wasn’t the sun overhead that greeted him with needles forced into the only eye he had left in his buzzing skull. It was instead a blindingly bright overhead fluorescent lamp against a bruised blue sky, flickering and buzzing and making spots dance in front of his vision. A cold breeze blew around him, bringing with it a bleak winter chill, but it didn’t bother him much. He was hot anyways. He was warm, the cold didn’t bother him. Instead something else did. Something sharp pricked his chest and he squirmed. He ached, waves of pain still rolling through him every time those rough, calloused hands touched him.

Kaz’s breathing lapsed in little spasms and waves and there were so many things wrong with this that he couldn't keep his eye open for more than a moment without feeling the need to retch in the nearest bush.  The voice that spoke to him sounded warbled, like he was hearing it through water.  His head spun. Maybe it wasn’t Oliver. . .maybe it was someone else. 

The hands grabbed him again and lifted for a better hold. “Damn - dang it, you’re heavier than you look.”

No it couldn’t be Oliver. . .there was a shake underneath that tone. Oliver never did scare easy. . .besides. . .he was gone. . . Oliver was never coming back. Don had seen to that. So who was this holding onto him with such desperation? 

He doesn’t have time to think before his knees buckle under his weight and he hits the floor, the  sharp concrete underfoot driving deep against his kneecaps.  Someone else falls with him, knocked off balance. The pain, hard and jarring, seemed to galvanize Kaz for a moment and with a sudden snap back to reality he looked up. Sweat dripped in his eye and Oliver was already getting up and was yanking him on his arms to pull him back up.

It was Oliver. . .

oh god it was him. 

Wait. . . Wait.. . .when had he come back. . .why did he come back. Why was he here, what was he doing here. Don was going to kill him if he knew he was here.  Oliver was a traitor. Don would have him killed. . .

But he was here. Oh god he was here and he was yanking him to his feet and Kaz’s head swam and dipped and turned and tilted and whirled. . . 

And Oliver was indeed very much silent but there was a fear in his eyes that even Kaz couldn't begin to describe even if he could think long enough to do so. But Oliver remained warm and present and rough, a solid weight against his bad side, grounding him to reality. That's all he wanted, that presence. Even after all that had happened, even after all that he did, Oliver had come back to him. 

Maybe people were right. Maybe they were indeed inseparable, in both life and death it seemed. 

“Kaz, c’mon.”  Oliver shook him again and he blinked, trying to focus. It wasn’t hot anymore, but the pain in his side was growing, a throbbing burn in his stomach that stretched across his side and down his leg.

“On your feet,” he commanded this time, throwing Kaz’s arm over his shoulder. “I can’t drag you Kaz.”

“Let me sleep,” Kaz rasped, even though he knew the answer would be no.  

“You need to walk…” 

So much damn pain over so much shriveled useless tissue.  Why was it getting worse?

"Shit…"

Kaz felt something warm and wet against his stomach. His fingers trail down, but Oliver slaps his hand away. 

"Don't touch it, you idiot. C'mon, keep moving."

 Kaz was pulled upright suddenly and a shock of pain traveled down his side. The wet warmth on his shirt spread, so hot he thought it might burn him. His fingers tingled and the lights began to spin.  He didn't really feel hot anymore, just...confused. Why was Oliver here? Why did he come back. . .why didn’t his feet want to move properly?

"Ollie, I can't do this."  

Oliver visibly winces at the familiar nickname and God Kaz absolutely despises how he sounded. He didn't want to give up, not again. Not after...He didn’t want to sound weak. . .but why was he hurting so much. . .what was going on, why was his head swimming and burning and cold and. . .

And was this what dying felt like. . .it had to be, he remembered a similar feeling from years ago and it still scared him how much he remembered about it. . .but. . .this felt 

different.

"We need to leave, Freak," Oliver finally rasped, exhausted and Kaz never thought he would ever hear that nickname flow from his lips ever again. But for the first time Kaz could hear it shake just so and he was sure now that something was indeed very wrong. "Walk with me, that's it."

They walked. Half walked, half ran, stumbled. Tripped, fell, got up again.

There was silence between them. Quiet, and Kaz felt his heart in his throat, legs sticking and movements jarred as Oliver ushered them both on. 

And on, and on, and on. 

"But what about Don..." Kaz rasps suddenly. . .because he still remembers Don’s orders. . . Oliver was a wanted man. . .what if Don found him. . .what would they do? But Oliver doesn’t sound too worried. . .

“Don’t worry about it. . .just keep moving”

Something was wrong. . .Kaz knew that. . .but what.

"But Ollie. . .Ollie where will we go?" Kaz whispered finally.

At that, Oliver stops suddenly. Kaz holds his weight on a numb leg as best he can and opens his eye, and Oliver is bright and shiny in the heat encompassing his vision. Oliver’s brow creases in a way Kaz never thought he would miss seeing. And Oliver thinks before he starts moving them again.

"I don't know, Kaz," Oliver answered just as quietly.

Kaz didn’t question it any more. Sometime later, they hear sirens rumbling in the distance, blue and red flashing rapidly down the road. Oliver curses. He pulls Kaz close to him and holds him tightly against him, pressed hard against a concrete wall out of sight. A breeze blows, rustles the bushes they hide behind. The cold of the air seemed to lift him bodily. The moon was in the sky.

The police cars turn a corner and head straight for the Docks. Oliver waits a few moments till they're all out of view before they start moving again. 

On the slope at the end of the road, a car seemed to sit in the moonlight. Like a savior in the night, a boat to a drowning man lost at sea, and pressed against him, Kaz could suddenly feel Oliver’s heart begin to give off tremendous explosions like a rifle, 

bang bang bang.

Oliver leaves him pressed against the cool metal of the car's passenger door while he goes to jerry-rig the other door open. He still talks to him; he mentions something about Vincent but Kaz doesn’t really hear him anymore. By then his body had been giving it its all, but his vision and hearing had slowly started to fail him. When he finally got a good look down at himself, he noticed how bloodsoaked his shirt and the front of his jeans were; the wetness bright red and warm but almost inky black in the night. 

He also noticed how his leg looked near mangled and laid at an awkward angle from just below the knee. The sight should have frightened him, and the sudden chill should have done worse. But when the encroaching darkness finally encompassed his failing vision, and all he could hear was Oliver’s rough and accent-touched voice suddenly start calling his name with a frantic sense of urgency, Kaz’s only thought though, was how happy he was to admit to himself and only to himself. . .just how tremendously joyful he was to have Oliver’s stone-like presence beside him once again.

[aamethyst000]

i didn't realize exacctly how slow my progress will be (july 9,24 - 10:56pm)

holy fuck i did not realize how slow my progress in life will be! it feels so weird to be 26. like, not only the progress of my name and gender change, im talking about my progress in life! the changes im gonna have, the hardships ill probably cry to. i thought teenage life was hard, no siree. the adult life is difficult. once the adults before you leave you alone to be independent and strong and whatnot, they all end up telling you how wrong you are and how you're living life wrong. one side is trying to control how you live, the other wants you to be dependant and independent and some how balance that out on your own. anyway, getting off track here. today i woke up feeling lazy but also feeling pretty good about myself! i actually wanted to clean the house and do the dishes without complaint! which is a rare thing for me since teenage hood. it can get pretty bad on most days. my little brother and i did the dishes today and a little bit of sweeping. i am planning on doing the rest of the house chores tomorrow and start on the towels that were supposed to be done last week. which kind of sucks that it is only me doing the laundry, but what the hell can i do when we got my mothers' brother staying and only doing his own laundry, a 17 who is overly cranky, yknow, normal teenager bs, hes gotta do his own laundry whether he likes it or not. and a mother whose arthiritis hurts her enire body and really bad insomnia. 10 year old me would be very surprised of where i am at right now and 14 year old me would be very confused.

july 11,24 - 11:16pm - just got through washing the dishes and cleaned up a bit in the living room. finally and now i have time to clean up my room and start washing the towels, we desparately need clean towels considering how hot the weather will be this week. you know the funny thing about this? i have stopped taking my anti depressants for nearly a month now! i think i only need to take them during the winter. they seem to work better by then, which is weird to me. anyway, now that i have more trans tapes, im going to wash the towels tomorrow and have a bath by the next day. my poor room has been a mess for too long now and it has been bugging me for a couple of days. doing this will help me feel better about buying myself a new 3ds and cases for it, being more prepared about taking care of it than i did the first time around. i ended up buying another black 3ds, kinda thought i wanted a white one but i ended up changing my mind part way through the search of the new 3ds. i found one for somewhat cheap that came up to 195 plus 10 shipping which was fckn awesome! i so cant wait till they arrive now. though they wont be here till the first week of next month. i know ill be impatient about it but that is not new at all lmao im impatient with every perchase i make, i just gotta keep myself distracted till the items get here.

july 18,24 3:43am - i am planning on rearranging my room to open up the air vent in my room. since i bought the 3ds, i feel like i need to ''earn''' when it finally arrives here, but i am hoping to god that it works for me or id cry. well, not really, i'd be sad about it but wouldnt do nothing about it until i have enough money to save again to buy another 3ds. hopefully it wont come to that at any point for me. anyway, as im typing this out, i am wathcing chuggaconnroy's lets play of kirby 3ds. i heard about his recent..situation, not happy to hear it and not sure how to feel, not entirely anyway. not gonna lie, it kind of sucks and nearly ruined my day. im better now, i heard about this a week ago, so im fine. i think. i havent been able to go to sleep at a reasonable time lately and it sucks. some nights i dont go to sleep until it is literally gets really bright outside (5am or 7am), i did not think id be slowly devolping insomnia at the age of 26. though, i shouldnt be too surprised considering the fact that my whole ass family has it and possibly autism or adhd. not gonna lie, my whole family is a mess. but they are my mess, i guess. you ever feel that way? they are not the best, toxic in their own way (the older ones, not my cousins), when it some down to it, they are there for you (until they sabotage that closeness during any death) they seem to have continued the generational trauma. i hope my cousins are doing alright, some if them have a kid or two, others are single or childless, but they all have a decent job that helps them keep their apartment. so, i hope they are doing well.

by this point, i have one more journal entry to edit and double check on, and a set of papers to look for in my room. i was supposed to mail it back to the place i was getting my legal (now dead)name to my current one, it is coming up to a year so that it is my own fault on that one, considering that all i needed to do was give them the signed papers that i have right now. well, i can do that now and be a bloody adult about it instead of putting it off for tomorrow, every single day. is it weird to still feel like a teenager (16-7) at the age of 26? should i go to therapy for this? is this normal or should i be worried? does every other adult feel like this? and not just me and my friends possibly being delusional or just dramatic about it. either way, i am not entirely sure if ill find the answer or if itll be given to me. i am going to have a puff and then head to bed, it is already very late so im gonna have a puff and enjoy whatever sleep i can get. good night/day, readers!

[werechampions]

van is not naive or delusional about what she's doing in the woods with the storytelling and mythologizing. she's actually being very intentional in what she's doing because her focus is on survival, yes, but it's more than that. it's keeping the team together because they're stronger together than apart. i feel like people often forget that of the varsity survivors, van is the one with the shittiest home life except for nat. now we don't know anything about the JV team's background, but even if we extrapolate solely from what is actually seen on screen, we know van's mom is an alcoholic and her dad isn't in the picture anymore. she's the one who has to play adult to make sure she gets to national's on time, so i think we can make some inferences that her stuff outside of the yjs is pretty dismal. couple that with her very obvious queerness + butchness (AND being a ginger in the 90s, i remember those days) and van has a better sense of the world than most of the rest of the team.

van and nat both know that sometimes, life isn't fair and it just sucks and you have to deal in order to get through but most of these girls haven't had that lesson yet. but she knows that they’re a team, they’re athletes, they were going to nationals, they’re fucking badasses, they’re champions. and to be a champion requires many things. she's intentionally using familiar language that they all resonate with to tie it into their new circumstances. she's saying "look, yeah it's been hard, but we're fucking champions and we will overcome even if it's not on the soccer field" she is not making up the story just to make herself feel better. there IS an element of that, but van is not delusional. she knows exactly what she is doing by creating the story because while she and nat (and maybe a few others) have had to deal with the grit and shit of life, but people like tai, lottie, even shauna and misty, they're literally suburban high school girls. they haven't HAD to deal with life yet and now they’re getting the most extreme introduction

shauna copes by staring everything directly in the eye and daring it to flinch. van copes by dressing it up in a story to make it more palatable. neither is wrong nor right imo, just different approaches. if we follow shauna's lead and basically have the team confronting the fact that they let a kid drown and ate him to survive, i'm like 90% sure that they would not have made it this far, certainly not thriving in this community like they seem to be. they'd be bogged down by guilt and finger pointing, throwing the blame on others to shed that feeling of doing something wrong

van's not trying to be an asshole and rub shit in travis and shauna’s face. she's being pragmatic. she no longer believes that rescue is on the horizon so she’s determined to make it work in the wilderness because that’s all they have. right now, it’s spring and they have abundance and no problem with survival, but i am sure there is an element of her sort of putting off the elephant in the room of “what happens when winter comes again?” that’s why she wants this community to succeed and they don’t have time to waste on petty squabbles. if they can get their shit together, maybe they can properly prepare for winter this time around and they won’t have to do that again but there is no point in dwelling on the past because it can’t be undone. she's not ashamed of being alive!! but that doesn’t mean she’s a bloodthirsty monster like shauna describes them being. she truly sees javi as an unfortunate sacrifice, something that had to happen for the rest of them to survive, but fuck, life happens and awful shit happens to good people. it sucks but what can they do?

i do think van is looking at this as a way of (once again) minimizing conflict as she is wont to do, but it’s more than just “van doesn’t want to admit what they did so she’s making up a story to feel better”. sure, it helps her in her own way, but i believe there is a part of her that is doing this for everyone else too. is it the right way to go about things? who's to say and this show isn’t about that - but the story is intentional, there is a function to it. van grew up with an alcoholic, which means she learned to read moods and adapt on the fly and i feel like that's a lot of the function she's been serving in these first two episodes. she's watching the moods of the others and nudging and intervening to keep the peace because that's how they'll survive

i have been thinking about this quote all day

[kalims]

hello ! may I request number 3, 7, 8 from the Christmas prompts for Floyd? thank you in advance <3

‎˃ ᵕ ˂ . . "YES YOU MAYYY"

prompts,

twisted holidays

ukiyo — to be fair you had no idea when winter arrives in twisted wonderland, it's cold so you just resort into snuggling to your lover out of nowhere.

serene — their gift is in their front door, catch is it's you wrapped around hazzardly in wrapper meant for presents. there's no better gift than you duh!

not so lonely — you returned to your world and it's a christmas they'd have to spend alone. well they thought that way till you showed up on their doorstep with a bouquet of flowers!

character. floyd

ukiyo

on a range from 1 to 10 his happiness would probably break the scale (as well as your spine probably from how hard he was hugging you) you're well aware of floyd's tendency to 'squeeze' people, more or less his favorite being you but it doesn't take off the suprise every time he does it.

^ well atleast when he just does it out of nowhere. usually? he's pretty easy to read whenever his actions point to a future squeeze.

the definition of: 😊 meanwhile you're: 😨 because what the fuck he's cold and you were trying to find warmth in him not even more cold!

he just hugs you tighter, giggling and stuff ignoring or just completely oblivious to you struggling in his arms trying to get away from his freezing skin.

"floyd please!"

"what's wrong shrimpy? i ain't done squeezing you yet."

"ITS COLD."

"deal with it." *proceeds to laugh at your pathetic attempt to get away.

sleep with both of your eyes open,, actually you will cause now floyd likes to invade your space and its no different during bed time.

you only allow him to sleep with you if he didn't kick away your blanket as well.

serene

"this is the best gift ever."

"careful floyd. you don't want to break your new present." jade grins, watching floyd practice haul your (still wrapped in.. wrapper..) self to his room.

congratulations. you've dug yourself an early grave and a wedding.

floyd is spouting all about how this is the best gift he likes the most and for some reason only let's you remove the ribbons and other stuff after he's finished practically displaying you to azul and bragging.

"so you didn't get a gift like this did you? figured."

"floyd get out."

asks you to give him the same gift next christmas and wont accept anything else if you refuse. he's like a child, huffing and looking away but you know you'll win the ignoring game cause he never lasts two hours.

yes he literally just picked you up, regardless of your size with his monstrous strength and carried (ran) over to his room like a child taking a gift under the tree and choosing to unwrap it in their room.

though you never seem to escape the endless remarks jade quips.

"hm. floyd liked your.. present during that time. he'd be quite disappointed with this.. picture."

"jade. it's a polaroid and can you please stop doing this?"

"doing what? 🙂"

not so lonely

looked pathetic ngl he was just staring at the aquarium of the dorm with a tiny little santa hat on his head (courtesy of jade who claimed he needed to have atleast a little spirit) didn't even want to answer the door but when jade called him he just begrudgingly walked over.

screamed your name (in happiness) so loud that he actually woke up azul. don't wonder why he walked out of the dorm looking disgruntled and rubbing his ass.

is insanely happy but I worry that he'll actually throw a fit like last time if you ever try to leave again. mc you're too cruel to just come back and leave again don't do this I'll be sad again 🥺 *grips you tightly* lowkey guilt tripping you tbh

like floyd loves the flowers but stuff but you're the real deal here and he might've actually cared about them more if you sent them through long distance or something.

wow hes so glad he wore the santa hat.

"we're matching! 🥰" he points to the hat on his head and then to yours unable to keep his arms away from basically encasing you whole.

you missed floyd and his hugs even if it might be a little crushing sometimes <3

[thegirlwhowritesfics]

The Two Summers You Loved Me, and The Winter You Weren’t Around

Part One

Summary: Pennys niece is passing through town and just happens to meet a handsome mechanic when her car breaks down, Summer romance brews but everything isn't quite what it seems.

You’re surprised to see how packed Hard Deck is on a Friday at 4pm, you quickly grab a drink and locate a small table in the back, making yourself comfortable you watch as various naval staff mingle with the locals, there is a warmth to the bar that is comforting, it gives you a sense of belonging.

“Aunt Penny!” A grin spreads out over your face as your aunt manoeuvres towards you across the crowded bar.

“Kiddo your mother is going to kill you for being here” she says as she takes the drink out of your hand placing it on the table behind her “but I sure am glad to see you” pulling you into a tight hug, you breathe in her familiar scent of salt water and honey.

“I’m twenty-eight, she’ll get over it” you laugh off her remark, knowing deep down next time you see your mom she’s definitely going to lecture you for your spontaneous road trip.

Releasing you and pulling you to your feet, Penny loops her arm through yours guiding you out onto the deck, the crisp May air hitting you square in the chest.

“You know why your mom hates you coming to visit” Penny says softly “she’s told me to send you home”

You roll your eyes “actually I don’t know why she doesn’t like me coming to town, all I’ve got are fragments of whispers behind closed doors, so unless you’re going to fill in the blanks” I say looking over at Penny. Her lips are pursued but she doesn’t say anything.

“That’s what I thought” I mutter “I’m not going to be in town long anyway, I’m heading up to Washington, I just made a small detour”

“Alright, I guess you can stay a couple of days” she replies playfully “Go home, Amelia’s already made a bed up for you” her gorgeous smile lighting up her face.

“Thanks Aunt Penny, you’re the best” kissing her on the cheek you turn towards the car park.

“Oh and kiddo” she says, turning your heel she looks you dead in the eye “stay out of trouble”

“I’ll try my best” you sing out, your voice drowned out by the bar door opening and music spilling out.

Your soft laugh fills the quiet evening night as you duck around the corner colliding with a solid body.

“Oh crap” you exclaim “I am so sorry” you fluster as you look up into the deepest brown eyes you’ve ever seen. They are framed by long eyelashes and a gorgeous tan face, his delicate pink lips framed with the dumbest 80s moustache you’ve ever seen.

“Are you okay?” he asks, smiling down at you, his hands gently resting on your shoulders, steading you.

“Yeah I am fine, are you okay?” you ask stupidly like you could have done any damage to his frame.

“I’m good,” he says with a goofy smile on his face.

“Good, we are both good” you could kick yourself for how stupid you sound “ah, anyway goodnight” you say as you step around him heading towards your car.

“Night” he calls after you.

Fumbling in your bag for your keys you curse yourself, it's not like you’ve never seen a good looking man before, your body still trembling at the feeling of his warm hands on your shoulders.

“Ah-ha” you exclaim as you pull your keys from the bottom of your bag, unlocking your car you throw your bag on the passenger seat and put the keys in the ignition. Your car lets out a groan but doesn’t start.

“Seriously” you mutter trying again, you keep trying your car for at least 10 minutes before calling it quits and heading back into the bar.

Walking back in you hear the familiar tune coming through the doors

“I chew my nails and I twiddle my thumbs, I'm real nervous but it sure is fun, Come on, baby, You're driving me crazy”

the whole bar is singing along, you shake your head laughing at the drunken karaoke session, waving down Penny.

“My car wont start” you say sheepishly as you slide up to the bar.

Penny laughs reaching into her pockets pulling out her keys “I’ll organise someone to come look at it in the morning” tossing you the keys “now scram”

You wave goodbye as you head back out of the bar.

…

The early morning sun kisses your skin reminding you summer is getting closer, the walk to the bar isn’t that far and you’re grateful for the coffee shop just around the corner from Penny’s as you sip your iced latte.

When you walk into the parking lot of the bar there’s a handful of cars including your own, so you head inside and start opening up while waiting for the mechanic. Flicking on the jukebox you pick out a few of your favourite songs starting with ‘Shake it off’ by Taylor Swift. Dancing around the bar as you wipe it down, your voice carries through the empty bar.

“Shake it off, just shake it off” a male voice echoes along with yours.

Spinning around you see the gorgeous guy from last night leaning against the door smiling at you. Today he’s dressed in denim shorts, a white tee and a stupid hawaiin shirt, dark aviators covering his eyes.

“Oh hey” dropping the cloth you were using and smoothing down the front of your dress “if I had of known you were the mechanic I would have asked you to look at my car last night” you say.

He looks at you puzzled.

“You are a mechanic right? Penny called you to look at my car?”

“Oh yeah – that's me. I was just expecting Penny, what's the problem?” He says quickly like he’s desperate to get the words out but his tan face lights up with a smile.

“I don’t know, it just won’t start and it makes this groaning noise” you reply grabbing your keys and walking around the bar.

He holds open the door and bows slightly gesturing for you to walk through “after you”

Biting your lip you can’t help the stupid smile that spreads across your face.

“Why thank you” you reply ducking out the door.

“So I’m Bradley, I didn’t get a chance to introduce myself last night” he holds out his hand.

“I’m Eliza, Penny’s niece” you say, shaking his hand, as soon as your skin meets an electric current flows through you, and butterflies start in the pit of your stomach.

“Alright, lets see what's going on here” he says and you hand him the keys, he pops the hood and starts poking around.

You quickly grab your jacket out of the back seat and use it as a seat in the parking lot, settling in next to your car.

“I’m just going to grab some tools” Bradley says as he heads over to his jeep, you watch as he suaners away, his body tight with decadent muscles. You feel a blush spreading across your cheeks. Shaking your head you jump up.

“Hey do you want some water or something?” you call out heading back towards the bar, desperate for anything to cool off.

“Water would be great” he calls after you.

After splashing some cold water on your face and grabbing two bottles you head back out taking back up your spot. Placing the bottle for Bradley next to your front tire.

“How long are you visiting Penny for?”

“I haven’t really decided how long I’m going to be in town for, my mom has mixed feelings about me being here so I guess I will try to not disappoint her” you say with a nervous laugh “but this weather is making it difficult to leave” turning your face up to the sun you continue “so it’s just kind of a stopover on my next trip”

“And where is the final destination on this trip?” he grunts a thunking sound coming from under your hood.

“Is everything okay?” you ask peeking up towards the hood

“Yeah it's just a bit stiff under here” he grunts “so where to next?”

“I am heading further up towards Washington. I'm planning on camping and hiking and just relaxing. I’ve taken the whole summer off” you say wishfully.

“Compared to the summer on the beach? That sounds horrible” he laughs.

“Like I said, I’m trying not to disappoint my mother” your voice dripping with sarcasm, before you can continue a booming sound echoes through you, and a blink and you miss it moment, there's jets flying over your head.

“Why doesn’t your mom like that you're visiting Penny? If that's too personal you don’t have to answer” Bradley pops his head out of the hood, leaning over to grab a wrench out of his toolbox, sweat dripping down his face.

“Don’t forget your water” you tell him “my mom doesn’t have an issue with Penny its that she has a problem with” you say pointing off in the distance after the jets.

“A problem with the Navy?”

“Navy boys specifically” you reply laughing “my dad was a pilot and he broke her heart and she’s held a grudge ever since” you take a swing of your water, surprised at how easy it is to talk to Bradley, you’ve never opened up so quickly to someone before.

“I’m sorry about your dad, are you close with him?”

“It's okay, he died just before I was born” you say quietly.

A thunk comes from under the hood “Oh shit, I am so sorry” Bradley’s head pops up and he quickly wipes his hands on his shirt.

“What happened?” you say jumping up “did you do something worse to my car?”

He looks at you puzzled “no, I meant about your dad”

“Oh yeah, right” you shake your head “thanks I didn’t know him so it's not really that big of a deal” shrugging your shoulders you plop back down on the ground.

“You must really love this car” he says laughing as he sticks his head back under the hood.

“Yeah, we’ve had some really great adventures” you laugh before continuing “are you from Miramar?”

“Nah, I moved here a couple of years ago but I am a California kid through and through. Have you been here before?”

“Yeah, once when I was about 10”

“Well I am sure a lot has changed since then”

“You’re not wrong”

You both fall into a comfortable silence as Bradley works on your car. You soak up the sun and breathe in the salt air, letting the calm of the ocean soothe you.

“Would you like a tour?” he asks, interrupting your drifting thoughts.

“A tour?”

“Of the town”

“Oh yeah, that would be great” you say, your smile growing wider at the thought of spending time with him.

“What are you doing today?” he says popping his head out from under the hood

“I was planning on taking Penny’s boat out, but just don’t tell her if you see her” I say with a laugh.

“You can sail right?” He says concern written across his face.

“I’m actually very handy in that department, cars not so much”

“Well why don’t I take you to my favourite spot? further up the coast, no pressure we don’t have to if you don’t want to” he says nervously.

“I actually would really like that”

He smiles down at you “alright well let me just finish up here. It looks like you’ve got a crack in your oil tank so that will need replacing. but I know where I can get one really cheap for you” he tells you.

“No don’t be silly like I don’t want to put you out”

“It's not putting me out, don’t worry about it seriously, it’s no problem at all” he tells you “hopefully I’ll have the part by Wednesday. Is that okay with you?”

“That sounds so great thank you so much” you exclaim

“Well why don’t you go grab anything you need for the sailing trip and I’ll meet you back here in about an hour” he says, shutting the hood of my car.

“Yeah, that sounds really great. I'll see you in about an hour” I say, pulling myself up off the ground. After locking my car I help Bradley clean up his tools and I head back to the bar and lock up.

I remember passing a market on my way in so I slowly walked down the road, letting the now hot midday sun warm my shoulders. After grabbing a few snacks and some beers, I head back to the bar and wait for Bradley giddy at the thought of spending the afternoon with him.

… “Have you ever sailed before?” you laugh at Bradley’s poor attempt at following your instructions as you hit the open sea.

“Not really” he yells over the wind whipping around him.

You’re laugh carries over the yacht “it’s okay, I can do everything, you sit back and relax” You follow his directions around the cape, and after about half an hour of being out on the ocean he exclaims “here we are”

You round the cliffs and the most beautiful private enclosed beach appears. You wonder if you could swim it from the boat, it looks like a perfect slice of heaven. Letting down the anchor you take it all in.

“It's gorgeous” you breathlessly say.

“Yeah it is,” he replies, looking over at you.

“I wonder if we could swim to the shore” you think out loud.

“I’ll race you” he says with a wink, quickly stripping down to his boardshorts and before you can respond he’s diving into the water.

“Hey, that's not fair!” you call after him, you quickly pull off your dress and dive in after him bracing yourself for the first hit of cold ocean water. You catch up to him about a mile off shore.

“Looks like I won” he exclaims with a smirk on his face.

Shaking your head you playfully splash him “you cheated”

A mock look of shock appears on his face “I would never!”

Flipping onto your back you float in the soft current the sun hot on your skin.

“Now this is relaxation” he says floating next to you.

You two spend an hour floating in the water, paddling back to the same spot every time you drift apart. You can feel the warmth from his body through the water even though you aren’t touching.

You talk about movies and books you both love, you’ve never felt this type of comfort with a person before, it kind of scares you.

“I am starving” you say “I’ll race you back to the boat” you quickly flip over and kick off, hoping your head start will help.

It doesn’t, he kicks your ass beating you by a good few minutes, when you get to the boat he’s standing on the deck doing a goofy looking victory dance.

You laugh as you climb up on board, he holds out his hand to help you with the last step. The same warmth is flooding your body as earlier. You try to shake it off as you wrap yourself in a towel and head underneath to grab the food you brought earlier.

Spreading everything out picnic style on the deck, you both devour everything before laying down and enjoying the sunshine. The conversation between you flows as you talk about places you’ve visited, places you want to go, the afternoon sun kissing your skin.

A comfortable silence drifts between you and you feel your eyelids growing heavy. And no different than this morning a giant boom sounds over you and you jump up, clutching your chest “jesus christ” you mutter.

Bradley hasn’t moved, he pushes his glasses on top of his head laughing at you.

“You’ll get used to it” he says with a smirk.

“I hope I never get use to it” you say laying back down “such a waste”

“What's a waste?” he says, propping himself up on one arm facing you.

“The navy, a ridiculous amount of money is wasted on defence, it's terrible for the environment and then when they are done with you, they spit you out, leaving serving members with trauma” you ramble, Bradley’s face twisted in an expression you can’t quite place.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean–”

“It's okay, my dad was a navy pilot, I guess I just get a bit defensive,” he says, laying back down.

“Was?”

“He died when I was little, a training exercise gone wrong” his voice flat.

“Oh Bradley, I am so sorry” you say mentally kicking yourself.

“It's okay, you are right about a lot of it” he pulls his arm up in front of his face blocking out the sun.

“shit” he exclaims, “I have to get back”

“Yeah, okay” you say jumping to your feet “sorry I kept you all day” you start to lift the anchor and start heading back to shore. The wind picks up once you set sail making it hard to talk.

Pulling into the marina, Bradley jumps off tying the boat.

“I’m sorry I have to go, but are you free tomorrow night?” he asks, reaching his hand out for you to jump down.

“Ah yeah I am” you say confused.

“Awesome, do you want to grab dinner? There's a restaurant on the main walkway called Bayside, I’ll meet you there at 7?”

“That sounds great”

“Perfect” he says “but again I am sorry I have to run”

“Seriously it's okay” you say as you wave him off, he throws you one last smile as he jogs down the dock.

You follow on a much slower pace heading back to Penny's, a giant smile plastered on your face the whole way there.

… You arrive at the restaurant a few minutes early so you decide to wait outside for Bradley, quickly shooting a text off to your mom,

‘Hey Ma just wanted to let you know that I was going to stay with aunt Penny for a few weeks. I'm just having a really great time with her and Amelia and also her awesome boat ha ha’ You add a :-) emoji and hit send.

Leaning against the railings of the bistros deck you look out across main street and can see glimpses of the ocean between the buildings. Watching the sunset you take a deep breath of warm evening air, calming your nerves 'it's not a date’ you tell yourself, shaking the nerves out.

“hey you” hear Bradleys raspy voice call out from behind you.

“hey yourself” you say, turning around, tonight he has on chino pants, a white T-shirt and another one of his Hawaiian shirts “what’s with the shirts?” you enquire.

His deep laugh rumbles across the deck “I like them, they’re good conversation starters”

His laugh making you laugh “you’re not wrong, no one would ever lose you in a crowd”

Bradley starts to manoeuvre you towards the door, opening it for you. He gently touches the small of your back as you enter, sending butterflies straight to your core.

“Good evening” the hostess greets you both with a smile.

“Hey, I have a reservation for Bradshaw” Bradley says as you enter, his hand leaving your lower back,

“right this way” she responds, grabbing two menus and gesturing into the restaurant for you to follow her.

After you're seated you look at Bradley “Bradley Bradshaw?” you say laughing “seriously that is a serial killer name”

“Hey” he says defensively “it’s not that bad”

“No seriously, are you a serial killer? am I gonna end up chopped up on the beach?” you say with you say with a laugh.

“Look, my dad named me, I don’t know why it is Bradley Bradshaw but my dad just thought it was very funny” he says with a shrug.

“Ahh– speaking of your dad, I’m really sorry about my comments yesterday” you start.

Before he can respond a waitress appears beside you “good evening guys, welcome to Bayside, can I get you some drinks to start with?”

“Ahh– yes please can I please get a glass of Chardonnay?” you say

“I’ll just grab a beer”

“Perfect, I’ll be right back with those for you and I’ll be back shortly to take your order” she says walking away.

Bradley watches you across the table, “seriously don’t worry about it, you didn’t know about my dad. Also I hope you don’t think that’s the reason I ran off yesterday. I did really have something I had to do”

“No, it’s fine, I only thought it was me for like most of the night” you say kicking yourself for blurting that out.

“I was gonna call you that night to explain but I realised I didn’t get your number”

“oh shit” you mumble “hang on” you say reaching into your bag and grabbing your phone out unlocking it you slide over to him. “here pop your number in there”

he quickly types in and then you here danger zone playing from his pocket “and now I have your number” he says with a smile “my plan is all coming together”

You laugh “what plan?”

“The one to convince you to stay for the summer” he retorts with a wink.

“danger zone definitely fits with the moustache” you say laughing changing the subject.

“Hey! What's wrong with my moustache?” he says playfully

“oh nothing it’s just very 80s, it really suits you though”

Your waitress appears with your wine and his beer

“Have you guys had a chance to look over the menu?” she asks.

“Could you give us another couple of minutes?” Bradley asks.

“So what's good here?” you ask, opening the menu.

“I’m not sure, I’ve never been here” he says opening his menu “it's nice though”

You both sit in silence as you study the menu. A couple of minutes later your waitress reappears and takes your orders, after taking the menus she turns to leave and you’re left alone with Bradley again.

“so how was your day today?” you ask, unsure of how to bring back the level of comfort from the day before, your body frozen in nerves.

“I had some work things to do” he says noncommittally “what about you? what did you get up to?”

“I took Amelia out on Penny’s boat. We just went for a sail and laid out a little bit. It's really nice being able to spend time with her” you reply, your eyes focusing on the soft dimples he has when he smiles.

“Did Penny find out about you borrowing the boat the other day?” he says with a laugh

“I have a feeling she knows but she just hasn’t said anything yet. But Penny has invited me to stay for the summer” you tell him.

“Huh, it's nice to have Penny on my team” he says, winking at you.

Shaking your head you laugh “what can I say, I am sucker for a nice boat and beautiful water”

“Is that the only reason?” he asks with a wink.

laughing you reply “it's the only reason I am willing to share” a soft heat rising up your neck and spreading across your cheeks “ I really wanted to thank you for coming out with me yesterday, I had a really great time” you stammer “Can we just pretend I didn’t say that? That was awkward”

“It's not awkward” his smile growing wider “I had a really good time too, it’s been awhile since I’ve just been able to relax and I don’t know what it is, but being around you makes me feel relaxed” pausing he watches your face closely “was that too serial killerish?” he asks you.

You burst out laughing, causing people at the tables around you to stare, clapping your hands over your mouth “oh I am so sorry” you say completely embarrassed.

“Don’t be, you’re laugh is beautiful”

You take a sip of your drink, his stare across the table making your flush deepen.

Your waitress returns with your food and you both fall into a comfortable conversation. The restaurant fades away around you and you find it impossible to look away from Bradley, the way his nose crinkles when he smiles and the soft dimples.

You hadn’t realised how late it was until the waitress came over with the bill, reminding you there was ten minutes until close.

“Shit, I didn’t realise how late it had gotten” you tell her apologetically reaching for your wallet.

Out of the corner of your eye you see Bradley slot his card into the server book.

You try to hand Bradley cash to cover your part of the bill “Don’t be ridiculous, I asked you to dinner, I am paying” he says gently pushing your hand away.

“Well thank you, I had an amazing time” you tell him.

“Me too”

You both get up and head out of the restaurant “how did you get here?” he asks, looking around the empty carpark.

“I walked, Penny’s isn't that far”

“Can I walk you home?” he says, offering his arm.

“I would like that” you reply, slipping your arm into his as you start to walk down main street.

The warmth of his arm against yours filling your stomach with butterflies, you feel like a teenager with their first crush again.

You sneak down Penny’s driveway towards the guest house in the back, gesturing the path to Bradley to avoid the automatic outdoor lights.

“You did that like a pro” he whispers, making you smirk.

“I’ve had practice” you tell him stopping outside the guest house door “well this is me”

“I wasn’t lying earlier, I had a really good time with you tonight” he says moving closer.

“Me too–” you start to say, before you can finish your thought Bradleys soft lips press against yours and his hand comes up cupping your cheek. You feel every thought disappear from your head as you deepen the kiss, your body on fire.

Bradley breaks the kiss pulling back, resting his forehead on yours.

“When are you free next?” he murmurs.

“Tomorrow?”

“It's a date” his lips brush your forehead “sweet dreams”

You watch as he walks down the driveway avoiding the sensor lights a smile on your face.

[paranoidgemsbok]

[PULLING UP A CHAIR] 

OKAY, SO-

about 5 or 6 years ago these new neighbors move in directly across the street, a couple and their like.  3 year old daughter.   it quickly becomes apparent that theyre Churchy people, the kinda ‘weird fringe christian’ that pops up around here constantly thats like a step away from a cult.  

their house sits against a stretch of woods that go deep enough that bears come out of them sometimes, and its a decent sized bit of land on the lot itself, to put it in perspective. 

immediately the guy starts Landscaping, which like, fine okay.  whatever put a garden in sure.  but he keeps landscaping.  way into the night sometimes, like 11-1am, machines running, lights on, his truck pulling in and out.  he starts a landscaping Business, and buys Machines and Equipment. 

Every Night he backs his truck into a Very Specific part of the yard, against the treeline and nearly touching the shed on the property.  I’m talking VERY specific like, he would spend upwards of 15 minutes per night aligning this vehicle. 

He builds a second shed, behind the first shed.  not an addition to the first shed, mind you, but a second shed.

he continues landscaping.  he sometimes puts in more Piles of Mulch and Trees in the yard, but its never the amount of change youd expect from the sheer time he spends Doing Shit In His Yard.  day and night he is coming in and running machines and generators by the shed.

they homeschool their kids (they since have another child) and largely keep isolated.  he keeps landscaping.  and up until this point im mostly alone in being like THIS DUDES A WEIRDO and its largely vibe-based, yknow?  its half a running gag.  literally he has not stopped landscaping his yard at insane hours since he moved in and i just think thats weird.

suddenly, about three months ago, a FOR SALE sign pops up, in the yard.  my mom casually asks the lady (Dani) what’s goin on and why theyre moving.  Oh, They Are Moving To Alaska.  theyre selling Everything and putting their valuables into a trailer and selling their house and theyre going to Drive to Alaska from Pennsylvania.  no, they dont have family or friends up there.  No, no one got a spectacular job.  No, they don’t have a fucking house lined up.  they plan to be out of the house by september (again, about two months after the decision to move) and Dani seems honestly pretty unsure about this whole thing, but her husband the serial killer pops out of the shed all cheery and cordial and talking about moving and how they’re selling all their things. hes selling the landscaping business and equipment and is planning to do Snow Removal as a freelancer.

oh, also, they didnt start shopping for an RV until like two weeks ago, and its going to be two to three months until the RV they want comes in.  putting us nicely in december.  to drive to alaska.  he reportedly talked about needing hay bales(?) to pack around the vehicle so it doesnt freeze at night.

ps they have two young children, who both seem outwardly to be special needs

pps they have two doodle-mix large dogs.

im begging you to imagine this RV. 

they are intending to homestead up there, in a ‘census designated place’ that is 700 square miles with less than 2000 people.  he mentioned offhand how its apparently hard to get animal feed shipped in and they have to get a special freezer for it to last through the winter.

they left sometime last week in the middle of the night.  i do not know where theyre staying until the RV comes in.

this is at the very least incredibly unhinged behavior and when they find bodies in that yard they wont publish my interview because ill just be like I FUCKIN TOLD EVERYONE! I SAID IT! YOU HEARD ME.  I TOLD YOU.  I FUCKIN TOLD YOU.